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#they are all together in my head this is a set do not separate
ms-demeanor · 2 days
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You posted about adhd and I was hoping to follow up to clarify something. I’ve explained to my partner a million times about how the borderline-hoarding mess of his space is very mentally draining to me, and he understands but we’ve both essentially accepted he won’t clean his mess because he can’t because of his adhd. You’re saying he’s actually being a shit head?
This isn't necessarily an issue of him being a shithead, but it also isn't a sustainable situation. It's not good for you and there's a level of clutter that's probably not good for him either.
Large bastard is a lot more clutter-y than I am. The solution we've come to is trying to keep our messes at least isolated from one another; he can have his messes and I can have mine, but he can have those messes in his spaces, not all over the place. Sometimes those messes migrate, and that's when it's important for him to make the effort to rein them in rather than trying and failing to make a daily effort to keep our entire shared space tidy.
I think when you say "we've both essentially accepted he won't clean his mess" what I'm hearing is resignation; you're not happy about this but you don't know what to do so you've thrown up your hands and he feels helpless and unsure of what to do to improve the situation. This is the kind of "it's fine" that isn't really fine.
I think it would be worthwhile for you to each separately think about the mess and talk about it together. Are there areas that YOU *need* to have not-messy? Both for utility and your mental health? Are there areas where you can tolerate more mess than otherwise? Are there areas that are going to be harder for him to keep the mess out of than others? Are there things he doesn't *know* about cleaning up the mess?
I'm obviously a big "communication communication communication" person so I'm going to recommend a lot of talking about stuff, which is probably going to mean a lot of thinking about and interrogating stuff. I'm going to say "talk to him about why the mess bothers you" which means you also have to really articulate to yourself why the mess bothers you (for instance I'm not actually *bothered* by a messy kitchen, but I know it's going to reflect badly on us - and me specifically b/c of presumed gender roles - if someone pops by and the kitchen is a disaster, AND a messy kitchen is going to be harder to use). Genuinely, sometimes knowing *why* something is a problem might make it easier for someone with ADHD to do something. And it's not that he doesn't care that it upsets you, it's just that "Oh if I don't wash my breakfast dishes Anon won't have clear counterspace to make lunch" might be stickier in his brain (and less hard to look at emotionally) than "this thing I forget to do upsets my partner so I should do it."
For the record, I think that people with ADHD should read up on Demand Avoidance and see if it might explain some of the issues that they have in their day-to-day life; I've seen some really unfortunate situations with friends where trying to do things that their partner needed became the subject of demand avoidance. *I* have experienced negative outcomes of demand avoidance. The solution to that, however, isn't to stop making attempts to do the thing OR to simply try harder to do as they're asked/told (which reinforces the demand), it's to work on setting up a situation where the partners' needs are not interpreted as a demand. This is fuck-off difficult and requires a lot of patience and care and many attempts to succeed and will be different for each person and relationship.
(Also for the record demand avoidance isn't *super* strongly linked to ADHD and it's not a definitive symptom; like Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, it is something that occurs in some number of people with ADHD and can be a useful lens through which to examine various behaviors; you don't need to have DA or RSD to have ADHD, and having DA or RSD also doesn't invalidate your diagnosis; they're symptoms. For me, DA often feels like "if I don't look at it, it can't get me" - If I ignore all the messages I've got they aren't real and don't have real consequences so I'll just ignore my texts. If I don't look at the vendor email about the order, the problem with the order isn't real and it won't get added to my task list. If I don't look at the requests in my inbox I can't let people down when I don't do them. It's a self-protective coping mechanism but it's *maladaptive* and I can't just ignore the vendor email or all my texts. I need to work on a way of doing the stuff that I'm avoiding in a way that makes it less stressful and doesn't hurt the people relying on me. That takes a lot of effort, personal insight, trial and error, and )
But before I dive into specifics I want to be really really clear about one thing: sometimes people are simply incompatible. Sometimes one person has such a low tolerance for "mess" and the other person has such a high threshold for "mess" that it can't be reconciled. It sucks that this can end up being a thing that people break up over, but it is MUCH better to acknowledge incompatibility as early as possible instead of spending years and years building resentment.
There used to be a great forum called MiL's Anonymous that I spent a lot of time on. It had a lot of people in a lot of difficult situations struggling to get by and hold their relationships together. The question that was used as a litmus test to approach each situation was simple: If you knew today that everything about living with this person would be the same in five years, would you stay?
Because you can't control your partner. You can't control the future. You can only control yourself and your proximity to situations that are harmful to you. If you knew, 100%, that things wouldn't get better in five years, would you be okay with staying in this relationship? If the answer is "no," then that's that. Don't worry about questions of whether or not your boyfriend is a shithead, start the process of ending the relationship because there's a good chance the situation is going to be exactly the same in five years.
If the answer is "yes," and you'd stay in the relationship regardless of whether or not things changed, then it's time to take actions to improve your life within the context of the relationship.
(No judgement on that yes or no, btw. If you would hate living like this for another five years, and you would feel like you'd wasted your time and hadn't done the things you wanted to with your life, get out. Bail. Go. It will be better for you and better for your partner if you split instead of spending half a decade building resentments and and problems that you'll have to spend another half a decade healing from.)
Also, a note: you describe your boyfriend's mess as borderline hoarding - is the issue *mess* or is the issue *clutter*? I have friends who are very tidy, but whose homes are very cluttered. They like things, they have many things, they keep many things around, but their houses are always clean and well-dusted and orderly, just with a tremendous amount of *stuff.* I am addressing all of this as though the issue is mess, not clutter. If your boyfriend's situation is clutter (the space is busy and packed with things but it is functional and clean) and your issue isn't with *mess* (things out of place, things not having a place, things that need to be cleaned up gathering in stacks, falling behind on regular chores like laundry and dishes and taking out the trash) then you definitely need to assess whether or not you are compatible.
For instance here's a room that is messy but not cluttered compared to a room that is cluttered but not messy:
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That first room is a *mess* but it would be very easy to clean up in under an hour. The second room is fairly tidy, but would take significant effort to pare down and declutter. BOTH of these can be difficult to live with but the second one is not dangerous or threatening to anyone's health. (The second one is QUITE cluttered and if every room in a house looks like this it can be overwhelming to live with; this is actually harder to deal with in a relationship than the first one in a lot of ways. I don't have a lot of advice for what to do if your partner is a high degree of tidy-but-cluttered because I don't actually think it's a problem or wrong to have thousands of books or bins full of lego or a million kitchen appliances as long as you have the space and can keep it safe and well-maintained; this is a really significant compatibility issue)
Okay, all that out of the way, here's the hard work.
Talk about this shit
Talk to your partner and define "mess." Make sure you are on the same page about what you mean when you're talking about what a messy room looks like versus what a tidy room looks like. Gather reference pictures. DRAW reference pictures.
Explain not just that the mess upsets you, but *why* and *how* it upsets you. In this context don't think of it as your boyfriend's mess, think of it as an unpleasant roommate. Discuss this using "I-statements". "When I have to pick up laundry all over the apartment, I feel like a parent more than a partner." "When there are piles of miniatures all over the table, I feel like I don't have anywhere to do things I'm interested in." "When there are dishes in the sink, I feel frustrated because I have to clean before I can feed myself."
Discuss, frankly and openly, whether he knows how to clean. I'm not trying to make excuses for him here but a lot of people with ADHD have a lot of stress and avoidance around cleaning because they spent a lot of time getting yelled at for not knowing how to clean properly.
Discuss your needs, be firm about what you require but willing to compromise. You *need* some spaces to be clean, and some spaces may be harder for him to keep clean than others. It may be MUCH harder for him to keep a bedroom tidy than it is to keep a kitchen tidy; if you need a clean and empty bedroom with everything put away and he simply cannot do that, that is a compatibility issue. But perhaps you need *your* side of the bedroom to be very orderly and can tolerate a moderate level of mess and clutter on his side. Maybe you're really really bothered by a messy kitchen, but it doesn't bug you if the dining table is covered with projects and papers. Figure out something more workable than "his mess goes everywhere and i live with it because he's incapable of cleaning" because he probably is not incapable of cleaning and you deserve to have places in your home that are comfortable for you.
Reduce friction for cleaning
Sometimes the problem isn't cleaning, the problem is the many many steps before cleaning, or not knowing where something should go when you are done cleaning. One of the absolute best things I've done for myself for cleaning my space is getting a broom holder and mounting the broom to the wall. Sweeping is now essentially thoughtless. I don't have to find the broom or pull it out from a pile of fans or go scrounging around for a dustpan it's right there on the wall, frictionless. So here are some ways to reduce the barriers to cleaning:
Make sure you and your partner both know how to use your cleaning supplies and know where those supplies are. When I switched dishwasher soap I had to re-show Large Bastard where I was storing it and how it was used, because to him what happened was the dishwasher tabs just vanished one day and he didn't know what I was putting in the machine or the process I used. He sometimes puts tools away in places that I can't see (he's more than a foot taller than me) so sometimes I can't get started on a maintenance project until he shows me where he put the battery pack for the drill.
Consider making a how-to chart to or having him make a how-to chart to keep someplace accessible so he can reference it while cleaning. Goblin.Tools Magic ToDo is great for this. Basically a lot of the time people with ADHD have trouble knowing what to do from step to step even if they've done something before, so having a step by step guide can make it easier (I have notebooks full of step-by-step guides for everything from paying for my tuition to removing licenses for my customers to weeding my yard)
Remove obstacles; don't keep cleaning chemicals in the garage in a box that's behind a stack of parts, keep them in the room you'll be cleaning. Don't keep the cleaning supplies that you use to clean the bathroom in the kitchen. Sometimes this means buying two bottles of bleach solution and two scrubbers and two sets of cleaning gloves but having fewer steps (fetch the windex, fetch the paper towels, fetch the gloves) is often the key to getting things done (open under-sink cabinet and grab windex, gloves, and paper towels that are there instead of in the kitchen).
This sort of overlaps with the next category, which is:
Create Dump Zones
One thing that I've found that seems very different between people with ADHD cleaning and neurotypical people cleaning is that neurotypical people are good at getting to a point where the cleaning is "done." They have checked off their tasks and they have finished and it is over. There are *SOME* chores that are like this (taking out the trash is a binary state, the trash has been taken out or it has not) and some chores are perpetual (horrid cursed dishes) but I think with people with ADHD, some chores that are binary for neurotypicals are actually perpetual chores. For instance "clean off the counter" is not a one and done for me. "Clean off the counter" may involve a three day reorganization project. "Clean off the counter" does not mean "wipe down the tile and put dishes away" it means assessing whether or not I need to make vegetable stock and bleaching three tea containers and reconsidering whether or not the sharps container should live somewhere else and going through the mail and figuring out what needs to be responded to and taking out the recycling and on and on and on.
We have had company at the house for the last two weeks, so I asked large bastard to clean off the dining room table, which is largely a project zone for him. Cleaning off the dining room table meant putting away his meds (and since he's a transplant patient that involves a 30 gallon rubbermade tote), throwing away some trash, and totally reorganizing his workshop. It also incidentally involved picking up a table from facebook marketplace and moving my plants, which has now involved moving my former plant rack outside (moving buckets, finding and organizing planters and gardening tools) and taking the former table to the thrift store (not done yet) and cleaning the rug that was under the former table. So "either the table is clean, or it isn't" isn't really true for us.
HOWEVER "hang on we can't eat until the table is clear so let's drive to Pico Rivera to get that console table right now" isn't a workable plan, so you create dumpzones as areas of holding between the start and the finish of the chore.
A dump zone can be a laundry basket. It can be a craft bin. It can be a back room or under your bed. It is a place to put things that you are going to deal with later because if you deal with them now it is going to derail the thing you are actually trying to do, which is set the table for dinner.
Dump zones are vital to cleaning with ADHD and I recommend them for day-to-day cleaning as well. The day-to-day dump zones might be more for you than for your boyfriend. For instance, Large Bastard works with bullets and he sheds bullets all over the house. I used to get stressed when I found bullets when I was cleaning because are these work bullets? Are these recreational bullets? Are they in testing? Do they need to be pulled? Do they go in the workshop or the office or the garage or does he need these today so they have to stay on the counter? And the answer now is "that's not my problem naughty bullets go in the jar." Which is perfectly sensible because he gets to say "mystery yarn goes in the bin" and "art supplies go in the bucket."
I feel helpless when cleaning a lot of the time. I'm frustrated and lost and I don't know where stuff goes and everything I pick up spins off into three projects in my head and every step feels like a wall to scale. Dump zones help me with that when there's pressure or a reason for cleaning beyond day to day home maintenance. People are coming over? The bedroom is a dump zone, I'll deal with that later. I'm just cleaning up because I need to? Okay I can find a permanent home for this new dish soap.
AS A VERY IMPORTANT COROLLARY TO THIS:
Active projects do not go in dump zones while you or your partner are cleaning. This may mean designating a project sanctuary area like a corner of the table or one particular chair in your main room where a project can be placed so as not to be disturbed. (if my current crochet project ends up in the yarn bin, that may mean that I don't pick the project up for another three months, it lives on the windowsill behind the couch because that's where it'll get worked on)
Do not put things away for your partner, put them in the dump zone for your partner. Your partner has to be the one to put their own stuff away in a way that works for them. I tend to find that this naturally puts a limit on the time stuff sits in the dump zone, because eventually you'll go "hey where's my thing?" and will put stuff away. If that doesn't happen, it's still generally better to have stuff in a dump zone than all over the home.
Do not decide you know what things go together from your partner's stuff and try to "put like things together." The neurotypical urge to put like things together is the mindkiller(j/k). You do not know which things are "similar" in your partner's organization schema and attempting to organize things on your own is going to end up with all of the things "organized" being functionally lost forever from your partner's perspective. Large Bastard's mom would do this and it was infuriating, she'd say "oh I put all the electronics stuff in one box" and she would mean soldering irons, transistors, ham radios, HDMI cables, and cellphone chargers. We are *still* going through boxes of stuff that she "tidied up" when he was hospitalized in 2020 and 2021.
To prevent the need for quite so many dump zones over time, you can work on setting up landing zones and "homes" for projects and tools.
Landing Zones
Landing zones are places where things go when you come inside from doing various things. Sometimes your landing zone only needs to be a tray for your wallet and keys, sometimes your landing zone needs to be a place to take off muddy boots and put a trowel and gloves down before you shower.
To make an effective landing zone, consider what behaviors you're trying to minimize and whether the people using it are ACTUALLY going to use it. For instance I was tired of the corner of my hearth getting cluttered with random junk so I hung up some hooks and put a shelf and a basket there and it became a really effective landing zone for my bag and keys and the mail, but it was VERY ineffective for Large Bastard because it's by a door that isn't the primary door he uses to enter the house. As a result I always know where my keys and bag are but he has trouble finding his keys and wallet. He tends to enter the house through our bedroom and has an overloaded valet next to the door and that's usually where his wallet ends up. Mounting a shelf to the wall above the valet and putting a basket and a hook on it will be a better place for his stuff to land. It's not that he's not using the first zone because he doesn't know that it's there, or because he doesn't care about lost time when I'm searching for my car keys after he borrows them, he's not using it because it's not by the door he uses. That's all.
I have a landing space for when I come in for gardening that's different than the one when I come in from grocery shopping. I have a landing space for when I walk into the dining room instead of the kitchen when I get home.
Landing spaces prevent stuff from piling up all over the place because they are a limited functional space that should be used frequently. Mail ONLY goes in the landing zone. If you have mystery mail or if you're not sure it's safe to toss, you put it in the landing zone. You can't let the mail get piled up too high or you won't have a space for your keys. You can't let the change in your wallet tray get too deep or your wallet is going to slide off, etc., but you also don't just put change on the coffee table or your nightstand because the landing zone is right there.
Homes for items are just what they sound like. They're the place the item goes. It lives there. My meds live on my nightstand. You would not believe how poorly I did with taking my meds on my vacation because they weren't on my nightstand. A while back large bastard lost one of his sets of sorted meds and we tore the house up looking for them because he couldn't find them in his nightstand, which is where they live. *I* found them in his nightstand because I emptied out the entire top drawer (he had only looked on the top layer) and found them underneath a radio and a hammock. Even though they were *hidden* they were in their home, so they were findable. I recently needed ink for an art class. Art supplies live in a dresser by my desk. Ink lives in the art bin or the top left drawer. The ink was not in either of these places (it was on a cabinet in the dining room behind a teacup) so it took me weeks to find it.
Sometimes the reason that ADHD spaces are so messy is because objects have been assigned homes in places that are visible and if they get moved they get lost. This is a genuinely difficult problem that requires a lot of effort to solve and can involve a lot of trial and error for creating a tidy living space. For some people, open shelving and visible storage might be a good solution. For some people, assigning a VERY clear home and inculcating that location by habit is the only way to clean up a space. For some people one very cluttered corner to at least isolate the chaos does the trick (for me and large bastard open shelving doesn't work because anything in one place for too long becomes invisible; that means that I rely on assigning things homes and large bastard relies on having contained chaos and a general idea of where to search but what that DOES NOT mean is that he is clean or tidy. His spaces look like an explosion. But he can mostly find his stuff and do what he needs to do and as long as that's limited to specific places in shared spaces I can live with it; the dining room table can be a disaster, the kitchen cannot).
People organize things differently. It often takes a while for neurotypical adults to settle into an organizational style that works for them and ADHD adults may need to settle into a new system every few months for it to continue working. The cleanup and declutter is most likely going to be a permanent project that is always going to demand some level of attention from everyone in a shared space, but "my ADHD means I can't do it" is not really going to fly. Maybe his ADHD means that he can't keep his space tidy, but it doesn't mean you can't move stuff from shared spaces into dump zones or that he can't do stuff around the house.
If he's insisting that his ADHD means that he can't clean it is possible that he's not being a shithead, he just feels helpless and doesn't know where to start and has adopted the belief that he's a useless piece of shit who can't even keep a tidy space like a grownup because he's internalized a lot of shitty attitudes (hello, my internal monologue about keeping a clean house). But it's also possible that he's just being a shithead.
It's something that's worthwhile to investigate with him. If he's unwilling to make an attempt, then he's being a shithead.
It is also not your responsibility to rehabilitate another person. If he wants to clean and it's something he feels bad about and needs some help and support with the way that someone might need help or support for learning to use a mobility aid, that is fine but you don't have to be the one who gives him that support if it's detrimental to your health, and you don't have to be the one to teach him that stuff if it's not something you're capable of. And if he is NOT interested in working on making your shared living space more accessible for you, that is not your suitcase to unpack and you just have to ask yourself the question from the start: would I stay with this person if I knew the situation was never going to change?
IDK, I'm sure a lot of this reads like "anon you must take on the emotional labor of training your partner to be an adult" but it's really meant to be more of a way of assessing yourself and your relationship. If you created landing zones do you think he'd use them? Would he get angry if you assigned a laundry basket as a dump zone for his stuff while you tidy the living room? Is living with him long-term going to be comfortable for you if nothing changes? Do you have enough of a shared definition of "mess" that you're at least in the ballpark for what counts as a clean house?
anyway good luck, and a reminder to folks that I'm compiling a bunch of adhd resources and other information on my personal website, ms-demeanor.com. It's coming along slowly but it will eventually include stuff like ADHD cleaning tips and how to tackle a hoard, so maybe keep your eye on that space.
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melodydrifts · 1 year
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anyway they should all make out
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audarcy · 6 months
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Me in the shower thinking about my wife: i think one of the big reasons why het culture "wifey/hubby" "his/hers" "tiaras/mustaches" matching sets other than the cis binarism of it all is that it reveals the thought process behind heteropatriarchy wherein ideal love is a product of inversion; two puzzle pieces that fit together but are separate and made functional solely by the utility of their differences. Heteropatriarchal love retroactively redefines a person as a half of a whole, their functions and idiosyncrasies only valuable when curtailed by another's. But more than that, heteropatriarchal love is so divided. My "hers" towel and your "his." Married on a friday because saturdays are for the boys. Your woodsmoke-scented deodorant and my lavender. We cant possibly hope to understand each other and that's what lends our partnership value, somehow. But the love i cherish--the love that nurtures me--is inextricability. Not the teeth of your personality spinning the cogs of mine but the blend and blur of our edges together. The further in the tide rolls the better. The love that nurtures me is accepting everything about you into my life even if i dont feel the same way about it that you do. Its a becoming. Becoming you, becoming myself, becoming us, again and again. There are no puzzle pieces to snap together, and im no more or less of anything with or without you. But no matter what happens i carry you with me now. Even in the small ways like how we wear each others jackets and deodorant and hats. I wear your mannerisms, and your jokes. I have your interests. You have my music taste. We subsume and consume one another. We explore each other by exploring ourselves and vice versa. The process of loving you is a mapping of a vast expanse and it is the creation itself of that expanse, ad infinitum. Loving you is a fluidity of the self. I try out new ways of living through you. I see through your eyes. My life doubles by virture of sharing it with you. We finish each others sentences and joke that were the same person but its truer than we have the language to describe. My selfhood blurs into yours; Im not half of a whole, but together we are a whole. You could draw a straight line from one end of me to the other end of you, no breaks. And why shouldnt we travel that line? Step inside my head and get comfy. Mi casa es su casa. Youre me and im you.
What comes out of my mouth when she walks into the room: id let you wear my skin if i could
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champagnefountains · 3 months
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LUCIFER MAGNE - H.H.
Prompt: Lucifer continuing to wear his wedding ring despite being in a relationship with you.
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Genre: Angst and hurt; somewhat fluffy (but only for a brief while). Warnings: Swearing. Unhealthy relationship/coping mechanisms (?). Word count: 2.2k+
Lucifer had been courting you for a couple of months already, the King of Hell finally deciding it was time to make the two of you official. The tension was so incredibly thick, that even the hotel’s patrons were growing sick of having to watch the two of you dance aimlessly around each other. Charlie included. 
The past couple of months were more than delightful – Lucifer treated you like a Queen, taking you out almost every other night, having nice candle-lit dinners, and dancing the night away. And if you weren’t really feeling the glamour, the both of you would stay cuddled up against one another whilst watching some cliche rom-com. It was like a dream. It was perfect…well, almost. 
The very source of your concerns was the golden band that remained in Lucifer’s ring-finger. 
You knew about the heart-break and torment that Lucifer underwent following his separation with Lilith. Understandably, having been together for many decades and centuries, the King had a difficult time trying to move on. Even in the earlier stages of your relationship, when he had been comfortable confiding in you, it was evident that he still deeply cared for Lilith, despite her absence. 
You tried to be understanding – you really, really did. But every time you held his hand, the cold metal feeling against your fingers set a painful reminder that maybe he still hasn’t moved on completely. 
It filled you to the brim with self-doubt. Perhaps he was just keeping you around just to fill in the void she had left. And if that were the case, were you even doing a good enough job in that? Hypothetically, if Lilith were to waltz in front of the hotel’s doors one day, was he going to throw you off to the side and run away with her? What if he’d grow bored of you all of a sudden?
Questions such as these would linger at the back of your head constantly, and as they did, you would cast a longing gaze in his direction. When he catches your eye, he would automatically send a smile your way, pearly-whites in full display. It would make you smile without fail, because how could it not? You loved that dashing smile of his. But everyday, you wondered if you could continue to maintain that smile in your life. 
One night in particular, during dinner at one of Hell’s finest establishments, Lucifer noticed that something was off. Your smile hasn’t been reaching your eyes, and you seemed like you were anywhere but here. Your eyes had a distant look to them and whenever he’d ask if something was wrong, you would become dismissive. It concerned him a lot. 
“Darling, are you alright?” Lucifer carefully asked once you both made it to the front porch of the hotel. “Was it the food? Was it not to your liking? Because the chicken was a bit off to be honest, it could’ve been a bit more seasoned–” 
“Luci,” you intervened and grabbed his hands, giving them a reassuring squeeze. “The food was great, really. It’s just…” As your voice trailed off, you were quick to feel that damn ring around his finger. Because, of course you did, and it didn’t help your mood at all. You force out a huff and pull away, causing the demon’s frown to deepen, “I’m feeling a little under the weather tonight – probably just lacking a bit of sleep.” 
Lucifer scanned your face all over, his brows furrowed in worry. “Well…I guess you have been working harder for the hotel recently.” There had been some truth in that – after all, there had been an influx of sinners in the hotel since the cancellation of this year’s extermination. But he didn’t seem to stop there, not fully convinced by your reasoning, “...But are you sure that’s all, my dear?” 
You looked at him, surprised, as if suddenly caught red-handed. He was quick to pick up on that too, confirming his suspicions and making him all the more nervous.
 “What are you trying to say?” You ask. 
“Well, i-it’s just that I noticed that you’ve been acting a bit off recently,” he splutters. “And not only tonight. You’ve become a bit more…I don’t know, distant with me. And it worries me, y’know? I just…I really, really care about you. A lot.” He almost looks defeated as he rubs anxiously at his nape, “And if I’m being honest, it scares the absolute shit out of me that what I’m doing now isn't right."
Your brows crease in confusion, “...What are you talking about?” 
Lucifer closed his eyes, dragging a palm against his face as an exaggerated groan leaves his lips. “Look, I’m not exactly experienced with all…all this – the one woman I’ve ever been in a committed relationship with left me. Just like that!” He lets out a humourless snort. “A-And I don’t know what I did to make her leave and I for sure don’t want to make that same mistake again. I…I want to be assured that I’m making you happy.” 
Lucifer looks up at you, eyes filled with warmth, as he places a gentle hand against your cheek. He breaks the distance between you to press his forehead against yours. You automatically lean against him out of habit. “I don’t want to lose you. And if I’m doing something wrong, tell me. Please, don’t shut me out.” He pleads, his voice almost falling into a whisper. The unexpected confession left you speechless, your chest feeling all the more tight. It was making you feel worse than you already did. 
You let out a shaky sigh, trying to keep the pending tears at bay. “Luci, I’m sorry. I didn’t know…I-I didn’t mean to make you feel that way. Trust me when I say that you’ve been nothing more than a gentleman, and every moment we’ve spent together has been magical. I appreciate you so, so much, and I could never, ever ask for anything more.” 
You shut your eyes tight, shame filling your very core. “I’m just being a little silly–”
“No, no. Don’t say that, darling. Please tell me what’s going on. It’s okay,” Lucifer encourages softly, his thumb rubbing reassuringly against your cheek. 
You grab his wrist and gently pull your face away from him. With the hand on his arm, you slide it down to grab at his own, bringing it up into view and in-between the both of you. Almost instantaneously, both your eyes lie on the golden band on his finger – to Lucifer, it suddenly clicks. But he couldn’t help but feel an internal conflict brew within him. 
“I-I know how much that ring and Lilith means to you. I really do and I feel awful having to feel this way, but I just…I can’t help it,” you mutter, finally allowing the first couple of tears to fall, “I-I often find myself counting the days and hours when you’ll suddenly realise that I will never be good enough for you. It feels like I’m constantly having to compete with her–heck, what am I even saying? I know I’ll never be able to compete – because, I mean, come on. I'm a nobody!” You chuckle tearfully whilst gesturing to yourself with a free hand.
“And I don’t think I’ll ever understand how you’d ever settle for someone like me. I’m not nearly as important, nor am I the best-looking demon out there. I’m just me.”
“But Lucifer, whenever I’m with you, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. I smile more. Laugh more. I even enjoy the little things more. And I don’t want that to go away. And I’m just hoping– Satan, I’m fucking hoping that it’s the same for you. And if it is, then how long is that going to last with me?” 
Completely shocked, Lucifer watched in silence as his love sobbed their heart out in front of him. He wanted nothing more than to go and wrap you in his warm embrace, and whisper reassurances and hush down your cries. Because, you were right – you did make him happy. So unbelievably happy. You had been the light that casted away the shadows in his darkest times. And yet, why? Why did he remain where he stood, unmoving as tears pathetically poured from his eyes? Why wasn’t he saying anything?
There was a brief, stagnant moment of contemplation where the both of you just stood there. It was the realisation that Lucifer didn’t make any effort to formulate some form of response, that disappointed you even further. It only made the doubtful voice in your head louder. 
It was you who ultimately decided to make the first move, wiping tiredly at your reddened face as you glanced at the hotel’s door. “I’ll be heading off first. I’ll be in the guest room tonight – it’s been a long day,” you raspily say, hiccuping as you pushed through the doors and disappeared into the hotel, leaving Lucifer alone outside. 
As you entered the hotel, you immediately noticed Husk’s presence by the bar, who had been polishing some glasses by the counter. In front of him was Angel, who was making some sweet, small talk with him. They were both alerted by your entrance as the doors flew open, and as Angel was about to greet you in his usual playful fashion, his voice fell flat when he saw the depressed state you were in. 
“Woah, there. What the hell happened to you? You look like shit,” Angel asked, standing to meet you half-way, “I thought you and Short-King were out on a date. Did something happen?” 
“We were but we had a fight or something,” you tiredly shrugged as you walked past the arachnid and plopped yourself down on one of the bar stools. You swirled yourself on the seat to face Husk. “Give me the strongest shit you have. And make it double,” you waved absently at the feline-demon, who raised an incredulous brow at your bluntness. “Damn, it must be that serious considering you don’t even drink,” he grumbles as he turns to start brewing a glass of something, “...do you wanna talk about it?"
You contemplated his offer for a second and realised that you did. For the next five or so minutes, you ended up recounting everything that happened earlier tonight, all the while shedding even more tears. Angel was kind enough to supply you with a mountain of tissues to cry into.
“Well, it sounds to me that your man’s got a whole lot of thinking to do,” Husk clicks his tongue. “But what you’re feeling is completely valid.” “Yeah, who the fuck wears their ol’ wedding ring while dating someone else? What an asshole,” Angel hisses. 
“S-So you guys think there’s a possibility that he might consider ending things with me?” You question dejectedly. Husk and Angel share a look of uncertainty, suddenly feeling the need to be careful of their words. Because they genuinely weren’t sure.
“I–Look, that’s not something we should be focusing on at the moment– I mean, of course, let’s hope that that’s not where this is going. I just think he needs some space to think things through properly,” Husk says. 
“And I know I was talking a whole lot of shit before but let’s take the benefit of the doubt and look at things from his point of view. He was in that boat for more than a couple thousand years. And shit, that’s a lot of fucking years.” Angel points out. “It might take him a while longer to adjust to that, y’know?” Angel places a hand on your shoulder, grinning at you reassuringly, “But there’s one thing for sure that myself and everyone else knows: the guy loves yah, toots. Anyone with eyes can see it, and you guys are really fucking disgusting about it too–ow!” 
Angel suddenly lunges forward against the counter as one of Husk’s wings swipes down to slap the back of his head. “‘The fuck was that for?! It’s true, ain’t it?!” Husk rolled his eyes at his dramatics, before turning back to you. “He’s right, though. Just…just give him a bit more time. I’m sure in the end, the both of you will be fine.” 
Meanwhile, Lucifer decided to head back to his own castle, wanting to be alone to sort through his cluttered thoughts. He was beyond upset with himself for making you cry like that, because it was the last thing he wanted. But he was more upset at the fact that he didn’t know how to navigate through his emotions, despising that he found himself second guessing his feelings. 
As you explicitly implied, was he really still unconsciously longing for Lilith? Was that why he kept wearing his ring? Why was he still wearing it? Was it just for his own comfort? But why would he need it anyways? You were there, weren’t you? All he had said to you tonight, he was contradicting himself, wasn’t he? Perhaps he’s scared. Maybe he isn’t ready yet. But, why would he be with you if he didn’t think so? What exactly were you to him? And what exactly was Lilith to him now?
Lucifer was a complete mess, and that night he couldn’t find a single blink of sleep as these thoughts plagued him. And neither could you, as you scrutinised every aspect of your relationship, thinking of what this could mean for the both of you, moving forward.
Yeah…perhaps you both needed some time. 
Chapter II [x]
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guzhufuren · 1 month
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A Guide to Some of the Best Queer Asian Shows
The guide includes a show’s basic summary; main genres/tropes/themes and official streaming links (additional info on how to watch at the end of this post)! You can find some content warnings in the reply section of this post. Shows are listed by countries, numbered by the order I recommend watching in, not by rating. All shows have happy endings unless specified otherwise. The list will hopefully be updated regularly (last updated on 04/04/2024, 98 queer shows in total).
Most shows are about mlm, I specify with coloured notes those that are focused on wlw, polyamory, aromantism/asexuality, etc.
Tumblr does not allow large texts or more than 30 images per post at the moment, so you can click on every country’s list to expand them and view them fully in a separate post. You can access this guide in a google doc here.
Thailand 🇹🇭 (full list here)
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1. KinnPorsche mafia boss/bodyguard; action; kidnapper/kidnapee side couple
Kinn, a son of a prominent mafia head, is ambushed by an enemy, and meets Porsche, a bartender who comes to his rescue for a price, thus beginning their reluctant relationship as boss and bodyguard, which soon turns into something more.
iQIYI
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2. Bed Friend friends with benefits; office setting; trauma
King and Uea work in the same office. After a company outing ends in a drunken hook-up between them, Uea and King agree to keep seeing each other on a strictly physical basis. With no strings attached, will these two be able to keep things between them simple and carefree or will their emotions eventually get the better of them?
Uncut 18+ on iQIYI or GagaOOLala or cut on YouTube
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3. The Sign reincarnated lovers; fantasy; thai mythology; police
The story of the love between Phaya and Tharn who used to be mythological creatures Naga and Garuda in their past lives, and were forced apart. But fate intervened, and two men were reincarnated in new bodies. Now, they work together as partners in the Special Investigations Unit to uncover violent crimes and supernatural mysteries while their love is tested by mystical forces and past enemies.
YouTube
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4. I Feel You Linger In The Air period drama; time travel; bittersweet
Jom, an architect overseeing the renovation of a rundown villa, continuously dreams of a man he's never met. When a twist of fate transports Jom to Chiang Mai in the 1920s, he assumes the role of a servant to the affluent young master Yai, the mysterious man from his dreams.
GagaOOLala or YouTube
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5. You're My Sky sports; university setting; coming of age
Thorn, a young basketball player follows his senior Fah to university as a result of the promise they’d made — to become national basketball champions. However, to his dismay, he finds that Fah has already given up on basketball. --- Aai has to work in pairs throughout the semester with San, 1 year footballer; in order to receive a scholarship to study in Japan, Ai must be willing to do everything to get an A grade. --- Track running requires the compatibility of the team members to be very high. Vee, who became the new racquet 4, has to speed up training to fit in with the team as quickly as possible, especially with Dome, spending extra time together to train. Is love actually a major obstacle on the path of being an athlete?
Viki
> more tv shows from Thailand
GMMTV Thailand 🇹🇭 (full list here)
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1. My School President high school setting; secret crush; school president/rebel musician
Gun is the head of his high school music club. Tinn is a school president and Gun's long-term rival. The Principal wants to disband some of the school’s “useless” after-school clubs, especially the music club. Per school rules, the student council president is the one who has the power to dissolve clubs. Gun is now at Tinn’s mercy, so he attempts to do whatever he can to persuade his rival not to cancel the music club. Little does he know, Tinn actually has a secret crush on him. Could romance brew as Gun makes a desperate attempt to secure the future of his band?
Viki (MSP) & YouTube (Our Skyy special 33-40) & YouTube (special)
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2. Moonlight Chicken adult romance; age gap; deaf character
Jim is an ordinary guy running a chicken rice diner. One night, he meets Wen when he stays past closing drunk. Brought together by fate that night, intangible feelings arise. Neither can stop thinking about the other despite Jim's efforts to remain unattached. Jim also takes care of his nephew Li Ming, who is falling in love with Heart, a deaf teenager who is practically kept under house arrest by his affluent parents.
YouTube
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3. Not Me revolution; freedom fighters; secret twins
When his twin Black is viciously attacked and subsequently left hospitalised in unconsciousness, White is unable to endure the harm done to his brother in silence. He learns Black was a part of a gang of anti-capitalist freedom fighters, and it was one of them who betrayed him. White disguises himself as Black to discover which one of them betrayed him and put him in a coma.
YouTube
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4. 23.5 wlw; high school setting; secret admirer
Ongsa moves to a new school and meets Sun, a cute popular girl who she immediately falls for. However, she decides to approach Sun in instagram dms under the pseudonym Earth, leading Sun to believe she's talking to a guy. But Ongsa does not want to lose the opportunity to talk to Sun, so she decides to keep the fact that she is a girl a secret and continue talking as Earth.
YouTube
> more tv shows from GMMTV Thailand
Japan 🇯🇵 (full list here)
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1. Cherry Magic!   mind reading; secret crush; office setting
By still being a vіrgin at 30, Adachi gains a magical power – the ability to read other people's minds by touching them. At first, he’s overwhelmed by his new ability, and it’s not proving to be helpful to him. But that all changes when he accidentally touches their office’s most perfect guy Kurosawa, who he learns has romantic feelings for him.
WeTV (Cherry Magic) & no international streaming of Cherry Magic The Movie is available to my knowledge, so watch on bilibili or KissKH
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2. Kieta Hatsukoi (My Love Mix-Up!)   misunderstanding; high school setting
Aoki has a crush on Hashimoto, the girl in the seat next to him in class. But he despairs when he borrows her eraser and sees she's written the name of another boy — Ida — on it. To make matters more confusing, Ida sees Aoki holding that very eraser and thinks Aoki has a crush on him!
Viki
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3. Our Dining Table food; child character
Salaryman Yutaka finds it difficult to share meals with other people. However, his life starts to change when one day, his cooking attracts the attention of a young boy named Tane and his older brother Minoru. The two brothers are impressed by Yutaka's cooking skill and invite him to their house to cook together. Yutaka's dreary life begins to change, and soon he finds himself looking forward to the meals he shares with the Ueda siblings together, as well as developing a taste for romantic feelings.
GagaOOLala
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4. She Loves to Cook and She Loves to Eat wlw; neighbours; self-discovery; food
Nomoto loves to cook, but tends to make too much food and has no one to share it with. Luckily for her, turns out her neighbor Kasuga has a big enough appetite for the both of them.
No international streaming available, translated to english by Furritsubs, S1 & S2, watching instructions provided, please support translator on kofi.
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5. Takara-kun to Amagi-kun high school setting; relationship exploration
Takara is a good-looking popular guy in class, while Amagi is a simple but bright and pure fellow classmate. The two begin to date in secret after Amagi's blurted out confession.
Viki or GagaOOLala
> more tv shows from Japan
China 🇨🇳 (full list here)
Most chinese shows are adapted from explicitly queer novels, the shows are undeniably and obviously queer, but nevertheless the queer romance part is censured. The only exception is number 4 on the list, it is not censored.
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1. The Untamed period drama; fantasy
An epic fantasy led by a problem child who comes back from the dead 16 years later in order to fix the broken world he left behind — and finally unite with his soulmate.
YouTube
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2. Word of Honor period drama; fantasy
The leader of assassin organisation Zhou Zishu quits his position in pursuit of freedom with drastic measures. In his travels, he meets Wen Kexing, the leader of Ghost Valley who wants nothing but revenge. The two become entangled in various machinations within the martial arts world, and eventually become soulmates instrumental in each other's redemption.
YouTube & Special Episode on Tumblr or DailyMotion
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3. Couple of Mirrors wlw; period drama; socialite/assassin
You Yi is a kind-hearted socialite and a successful author. Her perfect life is turned upside-down when she discovers a betrayal by the two most trusted people in her life. With no one left to turn to, she finds refuge in the friendship and support of Yan Wei, a lonely female killer disguised as the owner of a photo studio.
YouTube. the show doesn’t have a happy ending, but it can be a happy ending for you if you stop watching at episode 12 timestamp 28:02.
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4. Stay With Me enemies to lovers; high school setting; unconventional families; slow burn
Su Yu is a high school student who lives with his single poor father. Su Yu gets a new classmate Wu Bi. The two clash right from the start, and after getting off on the wrong foot, their explosive relationship takes a turn.
YouTube or GagaOOLala. the show doesn’t have a happy ending, but it can be a happy ending for you if you stop watching at episode 24 timestamp 05:00. OR watch the full thing and look at this post after
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5. The Spirealm inside of a video game; mystery; fantasy; horror-ish; hopeful ending
A game designer Lin Qiushi is transported inside of a game he recently played, and now he must go through 12 horrifying survivor game doors to survive in the real world. Inside his first door he meets Ruan Nanzhu, a mysterious man who offers him to team up.
The show was taken down from streaming, download files here and subtitles here.
Various WLW mini web-dramas here.
Various WLW short films here.
South Korea 🇰🇷 (full list here)
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1. Love for Love's Sake inside of a video game; high school setting; healing
At the age of 29 Tae Myungha finds himself transported into a fictional video game, and now 19 years old, he meets Cha Yeowoon, who is in the darkest moment of his life. And a translucent window appears where he receives a mission — to make Cha Yeowoon happy.
iQIYI (better subtitles) or GagaOOLala
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2. Semantic Error enemies to lovers; university setting
A serious programmer and a rebellious artist clash over a school project. Their animosity keeps escalating to new extremes, defined by petty pranks and feisty arguments.
Viki
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3. Love Tractor farm setting; farmer/city musician
Sunyeol, a city man with zero ability to survive in the countryside, comes to his grandfather's rural home. In front of him appears Yechan, a passionate and kind young farmer. While learning about rural life and assisting with farming tasks, Sunyeol gradually finds himself drawn to Yechan's warm and straightforward nature, while Yechan helplessly falls for Sunyeol.
iQIYI
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4. Our Dating Sim high school friends to lovers; office setting
After 7 years, Lee Wan meets his first love, Shin Kitae, in a gaming company. When they were best friends in high school, Lee Wan was in love with Kitae. But he ran away and disappeared after confessing his feelings to Kitae after graduation. When the two of them begin working on a new dating simulation game and get more immersed in the project, old feelings are rekindled.
Viki or GagaOOLala
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5. She Makes My Heart Flutter wlw; bar setting; niece and aunt dynamic
The extroverted Gang Seol is hired by her aunt Jung at her only-women bar. Even though they are both lesbians, they seem to be worlds apart and have very different love stories.
YouTube
> more tv shows from South Korea
Taiwan 🇹🇼 (full list here)
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1. History3: Trapped mafia boss/policeman
The story of a police officer who becomes trapped in the underworld, as he develops feelings for a gang leader.
YouTube or Viki
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2. Kiseki: Dear to Me mafia; age gap
Bai Zongyi, an exemplary high school student with dreams of becoming a doctor, is one day unexpectedly drawn into the world of a charismatic and mischievous gangster Fan Zerui, who blackmails him into taking him in and treating his wounds. Just as their love story begins to unfold, Fan Ze Rui's criminal life catches up with him. On the other hand, Chen Yi and Ai Di are two orphans who grew up in the gang together. Ai Di has always loved Chen Yi, but Chen Yi only notices their boss.
Viki or GagaOOLala or YouTube
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3. My Tooth Your Love dentist/chef; trauma healing
Bai Lang is a successful bistro owner with an severe fear of visiting the dentist... until a toothache forces him to come face to face with the handsome yet cold dentist Jin Xunan.
Viki
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4. Anti Reset android/human
When Chu Yi Ping, an emotionless man, dislocates his hand in an accident at school, his uncle gives him Ever 9 as a caretaker, an experimental intelligent robot that his company is secretly testing.
Viki or iQIYI or GagaOOLala
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5. History2: Crossing the Line sports; high school setting
When an injury sidelines a high school senior from the volleyball team, he develops feelings for a recruit.
YouTube or Viki
> more tv shows from Taiwan
Philippines 🇵🇭
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1. Sleep With Me wlw; radio; disabled character in a wheelchair
A science textbook writer with a sleep disorder meets a wheelchair-using radio host who runs the midnight shift. This chance encounter at the radio station quickly sparks their interest in each other.
GagaOOLala
---
You can watch many shows for free on YouTube, and watch others on the streaming websites by setting VPN to one of the countries in the list. In other cases I recommend paying for subscriptions to show appreciation and support of content in order to get more of it in the future, but if you can’t, watch on KissKH (better quality), Dramacool or get files from MkvDrama. Enjoy!  🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
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simplyholl · 1 month
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Reckless
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Summary: When you act recklessly on a mission, Bucky gets mad at you.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F. Reader
Warnings: Smut. 18+ ONLY. Minors DNI.
See My Masterlist Here
You had really done it now. You made Bucky so mad, he couldn’t even look at you. You were paired together for a mission, and you acted recklessly. You got separated from him and instead of waiting for him, you found the Hydra bunker where they were hiding.
You burst in without a plan and they would have most likely killed you. But Bucky came in and saved you. On the way back, he wouldn’t look at you, speak to you, or even acknowledge your existence.
It took a lot for him to get angry. So you didn’t know how you could fix this. You were such good friends, and he always made time for you. It was going on three days and he ignored every text, call, FaceTime, and knock on his door. You didn’t even know why he was so upset with you. You had done stupid stuff during missions before.
Finally you had enough of the silent treatment, so you waited until it was his normal time to train. He liked to work alone, so you didn’t have to worry about anyone else being there and interrupting you. You made your way to the gym, disappointed that he wasn’t there, nobody was.
You were just about to leave and come up with another plan when you heard someone in the men’s locker room. You hoped it was Bucky as you entered, the smell of soap filled the steamy room. Your sneakers squeaked with every step on the wet tile floor.
You heard Bucky singing some old fashioned song. Following his voice passed the lockers, you step over Thor’s discarded shorts. You shake your head, feeling sorry for the cleaners Tony hired. You see Bucky’s head peaking over the shower door. For a split second, you debate turning around. But you want your friend back more than anything, so you continue all the way to the showers.
“James, we need to talk.” Bucky jumps at the sound of your voice. “What are you doing in here? This is the men’s locker room.” He rolls his eyes, turning towards the spray of water. “You wouldn’t talk to me, I didn’t know when I’d be able to catch you.” He doesn’t answer, instead he picks up the shampoo bottle squirting some into his palm.
“I’m sorry for what I did. I just want you to talk to me.” He reaches up to wash the shampoo out of his hair, eyes closed. “I know you can hear me. Bucky, please?” You beg him but he continues ignoring you. He could be a real asshole when he wanted to. You set your phone down on the bench beside you. You reach down to take off your shoes then your socks.
You grab the handle to the shower door, letting yourself inside. Bucky’s eyes widen as he sees you in the shower with him. He makes an awkward attempt to cover his self. “Get out of here!” You walk over to him, “No! This is the only way to get you to pay attention to me!” You walk closer, “Tell me why you’re so mad at me.”
Bucky watches as the water sprays you, making your already tight workout clothes cling to your body. His throat bobs as he finally answers. “I’m not mad, I’m furious. You weren’t thinking. You never do. You went by yourself when you were told to wait, and if I hadn’t been close by, you would be dead.”
“I do stuff like that all the time, Buck. Why did it make you so upset?” Bucky takes a step toward you, removing his hands from his hardening cock. “Because I care about you! If you were mine, you wouldn’t be able to sit down for a week after that stunt you pulled.”
That was just the answer to send all your worries about crossing boundaries out the window. You press yourself against him, standing on your tiptoes to kiss him. When his lips met yours, it was like you were the only people in the whole world.
His metal hand makes quick work of your sports bra, ripping it right off you. The warm palm of his flesh hand meets your breast. He groans against your neck as his hands travel lower. He jerks your leggings off in one swift motion, throwing them to the side with a wet thud.
You were never so thankful that you didn’t wear panties as you were today. He reaches between you, long fingers dipping into you. You were so wet just from arguing with him, and he knew it. “All this from fighting with me, doll?” He smirks, knowing the effect it will have on you. You clench around his fingers as he curls them upward, his palm gently brushing your clit. “James” you moan, grasping his shoulders for support.
He removes his fingers from you, turning you around so fast that you don’t have time to register how empty you feel now. Bucky presses his body to your back, trapping you between him and the shower door. The cool door makes your nipples harden against it. You feel Bucky’s hard cock rub against the curve of your ass. You try to move to create some type of friction between you, but you can’t. His big body doesn’t budge. He uses his leg to spread you further.
You gasp as he thrusts into you, not giving you any time to adjust to his size before he plunges deeper, bottoming out. You claw at the shower door, as his thrusts grow brutal. His metal arm wraps around your waist, holding you where he wants you while his flesh hand grabs your chin. He tilts your face to look at him, “Are you going to do anything that stupid ever again?” He asks, his cock brushing that spot inside of you that makes your vision go blurry.
You can’t form words, it feels too good. “I expect an answer when I ask you a question.” Your eyes are glossy, you try to answer but you only make sounds. “My pretty baby, she’s too cock drunk to talk. Is that it, doll? Is my cock too much?” You manage to whisper yes, sending his ego into overdrive.
“That’s right, nobody will ever make you feel like I do. I’ll never touch you again, if you don’t follow orders. Am I understood?” Visions of his old army days flood your mind, the band in your stomach threatening to snap. “Y-yes sir.” You stutter. He seems satisfied with your answer, holding you closer to him. His fingers dig into your hip, no doubt leaving bruises, marking you as his.
He snaps his hips one last time, burying his face into your shoulder as he comes inside you. He stays like that for a minute, catching his breath before turning you around. He checks all over your body, his forehead wrinkling as he notices the multiple marks he left behind. “Was I too rough? I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just so caught up in the moment-“
“It’s okay. I really liked it.” You confess. Bucky sighs in relief, bringing you back under the water, he starts to wash you. “Hey what about me?” Bucky smirks, “What about you, doll?” He washes down your arms. “I didn’t get off.” You state matter of factly. “Oh, I know. Only good girls get to cum.”
Tags
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pupkashi · 9 months
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oranges
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gojo knows how to peel oranges
a/n: just something simple inspired by the poem oranges by jean little, i cried the first time i read it, hope you guys enjoy <3
wordcount: 843
masterlist
there was a lot you did for satoru.
you helped ground him, reminded him to drink water, made him food, taught him how to fold clothes and do laundry, showed him all your favorites- from places to eat and videos to play.
you reminded him what love felt like, your tender touches late at night, gentle thumb pads wiping away hot tears, soft whispers and proclamations of love.
satoru always wondered what he did for you.
he didn’t think much of the quality time he’d spend with you, he thought that was a given. he often brushed past the shower of compliments he gave you daily, figuring that was the standard. the little gestures of holding doors open, buying you flowers, remembering your favorite candle scent and buying your shampoo seemed too natural to him for it to be considered and outward act of love.
“you want some oranges?” you asked, looking at him with a smile from the kitchen.
“i could go for some oranges” he replies, getting up from the couch and joining you in the kitchen, taking an orange in his hand.
his thumbs easily tear into through the peel, gently digging his finger and separating it seamlessly from the sweet fruit, continuing his motion until the peel comes completely off, all in one piece.
you on the other hand, are putting too much force into your thumb, your finger piercing straight into the flesh of the fruit, shrieking when the juice gets on your face a bit.
“how do you always peel it so neatly? i have never once been able to” you huff, setting the now punctured Orange on a towel, washing your hands in the sink before drying them off.
“cmon sweetheart it really isn’t that hard!” satoru grins, taking your orange and easily peeling it apart neatly. “you have to do this, and then… get it there and boom!” his smile widening as he stares at you, a pout on your lips and an annoyed look in your eyes.
“yeah yeah mr. ‘I’m so good at everything’” you tease, tasking the orange from his hand and munching on a piece. “they’re sweet today” you smile, putting both your pieces and satoru’s in a bowl, heading back to the couch the two of you were on.
two weeks later the two of you are cooking dinner, reading off the recipe and realizing the dish called for an orange.
“can you hand me an orange?” you ask, turning around and thanking him as he hands it to you. you were determined to not make a mess this time, it’s just an orange after all.
but as gentle as you were, the peel wouldn’t budge, and the little force you applied proved to be just a little too much as your fingers pierced through the flesh again. you groaned in frustrations satoru already taking it from his hands, a smile on his face as he so easily peeled it.
“coulda just asked” he hums, handing you the orange, you’re glaring at him, giggling when he misses your nose.
“thank you angel boy,” you mumble, chopping the orange and adding it in.
one year later you’re sitting together in a grassy field, the wild blowing past the two of you, your laughter and love filled gazes scattered in the wind.
“i got some oranges from the market today!” you grin, taking them out of the wicker basket and showing them to your snowy haired lover. “you owe me breakfast in bed if i can finally peel this damn citrus fruit” you wager, satoru easily sitting back, a small smirk on his face as he nodded.
“I’ll do so breakfast in bed for a month if you peel it in one piece” your eyes widen at his proposition, nodding before looking at the fruit in your hands.
it’s only ten seconds later that you’re throwing yourself back, saying the fruit was obviously defective because ‘there’s no way the peel was that easy to cut through!’
satoru takes the oranges from you, peeling them perfectly and separating them into neat sections.
“I’m glad i have you to peel my citrus” you smile one night, taking the mandarin slices from his hand and humming in delight as the sweet taste hits your tastebuds.
“I’ll always peel your oranges for you” he replies, voice soft, his blue eyes seem a little lighter and his face a bit more relaxed as he looks at you.
it’s been years since then, and you never learned to peel oranges, the times you’d attempt to, juice would get everywhere and the peel coming off in chunks, the aftermath looked like an orange massacre.
satoru’s heart flutters when he sees the citrus fruit, knowing you’ll hand it to him, for him to peel for you. he knows you’ll always ask him to do this for you.
satoru is grateful everyday that you can’t peel oranges, because with the boundless things you do for him, he knows this is the one thing he’ll always be able to do for you.
taglist (send an ask to be added!): @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @4sat0ruu @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags @fushironi @nineooooo @the-mom-friend-dot-com @luna0713hunter @torusmochi
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captainfern · 2 months
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Hi fernie ☺️
I wanted to request some sweet time waking up next to Price/Gaz after getting back with them… these ex-husband and ex-boyfriend tropes are so bittersweet and I love them but I also crave some solid resolutions 😭 You can make this smut or pure fluff, whatever you want.
Thank you ❤️
ex-husband price, but the “ex” lays on significantly blurred lines now.
fem!reader, 18+ [unprotected piv, etc] — lazy writing/editing + formatting sorry
a/n: i’m so sorry for how late this is !! i’m literally terrible at completing my asks 😭 i hope this is good enough <3
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He had come crawling back to you last night.
Amidst the howling wind and the cold, sleeting rain, John appeared on your doorstep like a stray dog— hair wet and clinging to his forehead, his clothes soaked through, his lips quirked into a slightly embarrassed smile.
And then, then he looked at you with those warm eyes, his pupils expanding beneath the weight of his gaze, and you folded.
Of course you folded.
You let him inside, allowed him into the cradle of your very life. A life in which you had built around the absence of him.
The divorce happened a year ago. The constant strain of John being away, and the crippling loneliness his job brought you, was too much to bear. Without him, your home had felt like a shell of itself, so empty and quiet. Separation allowed you to make your own home not-so reliant on him.
And maybe it was hard. Maybe you did cry for him, yearn for him in the penetratingly dark hours of the morning— a want for his body pressed to yours, a need for his heat against your chilled skin.
But you had to move on. You were strong and, once the initial emptiness of your ring finger no longer bothered you, you were set free. The shackles of grief snapped and crumpled and allowed you to spring forth into a fresh life.
Yet, the night he appeared on your front step, cold and white like a wraith against a sea of black, you allowed him entry.
There was no hesitation like you convinced yourself there’d be. There was no sort of what the hell are you doing here, John? You simply sighed, your heart clenching beneath the calloused fingers of your reappearing grief, and stepped aside.
He had thanked you profusely.
And then broke down.
Still in his wet clothes, he hung his head and let tears well in his eyes, his hands balled into fists at his sides as he attempted to control his emotions. You watched him patiently, your own sadness itching tightly at the back of your throat.
He apologised. For everything you knew affected the relationship, and for everything he thought affected the relationship.
Long periods of absence, missing important milestones in your life and holidays, the strained communication when in the field. He apologised for it all, shaking and dripping like the lost dog he was.
When he looked up at you, eyes red and glossy with tears, his cheeks rouged beneath his facial hair and lips bitten from nervousness, you broke too.
Of course I miss you, tumbled from your lips. Of course I still think about you. Of course I haven’t been with anyone else. Of course I want you back—
The two of you broke like a dam, a crack of lightening outside acting as the starting gun, spurring you on as you moved in unison, meeting together in a searing kiss that made you whine out for him. But his groan of pleasure, of relief, was louder than any sound he had ever made before. It made your heart flutter.
That night, he held you so impossibly close to him that you feared you may sink into him— that your souls would intertwine within the heat of him, and you’d be stuck with him forever. But, after a moment, you realised it wasn’t fear. You’d happily seep into the grooves of his soul if he let you.
The next morning, you awoke bundled in his strong, warm arms, the coarse hairs a deliciously familiar juxtaposition against your soft flesh. You moaned quietly as you drifted awake.
John stirred behind you, the arm he had around your midriff moving, his large hand moving to splay across the curve of your bare tummy. He pressed against the warm fat, nose in the crook of your neck, nuzzling you. You whined when he gripped your tummy, but he just chuckled quietly with a kiss to the pulse beneath your ear.
Only now did you realise, against the warmth of the skin above your navel, that John was still wearing his wedding band.
It made your stomach flip.
Last night, while he had your knees to your ears, his cock heavy inside you, he asked about your rings.
“In the drawer— fuck— the bedside table—!” You moaned, his hips snapping forward, his stomach pressed to yours, pinning you to the bed.
He stopped only to lean over and open the drawer. Then, he fished out both your extravagant engagement ring, and the more simply wedding ring. Then, he resumed his thrusts, knocking another moan from your chest.
When you came around his cock with an earth-shattering orgasm, a moan of “Yes, John!” echoing through the room, he slipped the rings back onto your finger. Your sweet moans were a welcome nostalgia, a guilty-pleasure in this very moment. He came inside you after that.
Now, John was kissing the pulse behind your ear, arms around you, his chest to your back as he slotted one of his legs between yours, separating them so he could rut his hardening cock between the plushness of your thighs.
“I’ve missed you so much,” he whispered to you, the leaking tip of his cock rubbing against your wet folds, dipping in and out in a gentle rut with each movement of his hips. “I’ve missed my pretty wife.”
The hand on your stomach snaked down, brushing over your mound and then cupping you there, a finger pressing to the already swollen bud of your clit. He hummed when he began to run circles across it, slow and steady.
You mewled, arse moving backwards to press against him, then moving forward again to buck into his touch. The warmth of his cock between your thighs had your pussy fluttering, leaking.
“John…” You whispered, flexing the muscles of your thighs, the sensation against John’s cock making him groan. You begged, “Please, I need you.”
“Then you’ll have me,” he whispered back, the ruddy tip of his cock finally snagging against your entrance. He slowly, slowly began pushing inside, splitting you open with a soft, wet sound. He moaned against your neck. “You’ll have me forever, sweetheart. Whenever you want me, you’ll have me.”
John bottomed out with one final lazy snap of his hips against your arse. You both moaned, the air around you warm and thick like honey.
His cock reached so deeply inside you, nudging the pliant plug of your cervix with each rut. His movements never left you empty, keeping you stretched open around his girth. Your cunt squeezed him, dribbling along your inner thighs now as he rocked into you, the mattress creaking beneath you both.
The finger in your clit sped up, the circles deepening and quickening in pace, timed with his thrusts as they grew faster and faster, still lazy, but coordinated and intent on dragging you to release.
The pleasure was sickly sweet, parting the veil of sleep with ease. You could taste it on your tongue, the precipice of your orgasm, and the many more to come— sweet and warm against the wintery rain outside. Just like John.
“John…” You whimpered, your body tightening, sweat building along your already-dewy skin.
“That’s it, sweetheart, doing so well for me. My good girl. My pretty wife,” he praised, his cock hitting that perfect spot inside you every damn time. He drank in your moans, an elixir he had longed for since the moment you two separated, and continued his thrusts. Kissing your neck, he asked, “Will you marry me?”
“Yes—!” And you came around him, moaning loudly, writhing and spasming as your orgasm wracked through you. It was intense and hot and it had your pussy clenching around John’s cock like a vice.
Your acceptance made him moan, moan your name, and then come deep inside you, painting your slick walls white.
For a long while, he held you to him, cock still inside you, but the two of you weren’t in any hurry to part from one another. You felt sticky all over, skin tacky with sweat and cum, but you couldn’t care less. Wrapped up in your ex— your husband’s arms, was all that mattered.
“I love you,” John said to you. “Always have. Always will.”
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yesimwriting · 3 months
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something about bestfriend!felix who's so used to the world bending over backwards to please him that he seems entirely separated from the concept of boundaries.
it's one of the few things about him that remains unspoken because it reminds those in his social circle that no matter how much influence or money they might have, someone has more. and that someone is felix catton.
he's never weird about it, there's just this rule that everyone learns to pick up on and never mention. if felix wants to go out for the night or do anything socially with someone, it's customary for that person to cancel any other plans.
it might be more of an issue if felix's proximity didn't feel like sunbathing on an early summer day, but it does. so he's used to not having to work to get someone where he wants them.
until you.
despite your friendship still being relatively new, the two of you have bonded enough for you to accept his presence instantly.
felix didn't call before coming over. you answered the door after two knocks, grinning as soon as you saw him standing there. you didn't even think to ask about the lack of notice, you just invited him in and made some comment about how you were just studying.
he told you he didn't mind if you wanted to keep studying, that he brought over his own textbooks just in case. even though you were set up at your desk, you moved your supplies over to your bed so that you could sit with him.
it started off as separated as the two of you ever are, just your bent knee pressing gently into his lower thigh. your shared restraint dissolved quickly.
you're practically laying down, back partially supported by a wall and two pillows, felix's head resting on your stomach as you comb your fingers through his hair. he's holding up a textbook for you with one arm, fingertips absentmindedly brushing against your bare leg.
he breaks the silence with a sigh. when you don't respond, he turns his head and presses his lips against your thigh. your nails freeze against his scalp. "felix."
"lovie," he replies, tone as scandalized as yours. you sigh, and he can practically feel your eye roll.
felix grins, turning his head look up at you. he knows he should be good about this, about you, but he's not accustomed to practicing this kind of restraint. he's preoccupied with terribly soft thoughts of closer when he blurts out the question, "come out with me tonight?"
it's only a question by technicality, his eyes bright as if you've already agreed.
you press your lips together, and the hesitance in the look jabs at him. he brushes his knuckles against the side of your leg like that might tip the decision. "i have an econ test on monday."
the excuse deflates him. it's only friday, and even if it wasn't, you don't need to worry about your grades. there's a naturalness to your schooling, you grasp everything almost immediately. any personal selfishness aside, you don't need a weekend of studying. it's objective fact.
you're still watching him, expression unsure. "y'know too much studying's bad for you." your lips part, but before you can say anything, felix is shutting the book he'd been holding up for you.
he extends his arm, his palm covering the upper half of your face with the palm of his hand. you laugh out his name. "what? your eyes need the rest." you shift, still giggling as you halfheartedly try to push him off. "you'll get a headache."
your fingers wrap around his wrist. "you're my headache."
he lets out a mock gasp before pulling away entirely. felix doesn't miss your slight pout as he sits up. "actually?"
you're chasing after him, sitting up and attempting to grab his arm. felix lets you. "no." you squeeze his arm to you. "i meant it in a you're my best friend way."
"that so?" you nod innocently, all wide eyes as if to say see? i have no intentions of being anything other than a perfect angel.
felix pretends to contemplate forgiveness, then, with no warning lays down. you're not given a chance to deliberate what that means before he's tugging on your arm. he mumbles a brief, explanatory, "c'mere," as he pulls you into his chest.
you listen, moving to rest your chin against the side of his chest. your arm's across him. felix's shirt has ridden up right where your fingertips naturally rest. the bare contact makes goosebumps break out across your arms.
"go out with me tonight," he tries, voice soft. you have to drop your gaze to keep from immediately melting and agreeing to whatever he wants. "c'mon, think it's good for you to take a break every now and then."
you lift your head up just enough to glare at him. felix shifts his leg, pressing it against yours. you push back gently, just enough to reciprocate the gesture. "so you're saying i'm a friendless loser that only ever goes out when you make me?"
"i'm saying," he extends the syllables to buy himself some time to think, "i have to go, and i won't have any fun without you."
you find it hard to imagine that felix catton ever has to do anything he doesn't want to. you're also confident in his ability to find fun at a party. "you have farleigh, and oliver, and annabel--you'll be fine without me."
his hand is on your back, fingers tracing lazy patterns against the fabric of your t-shirt. "i don't want anyone else." the soft whine in his tone paired with his slight pout makes him seem smaller, like a little kid that just needs to be wrapped up. "i want you."
"you have me."
felix frowns, "doesn't feel like it."
you're losing. "do you really want me to go that badly?"
he smiles, feeling the crack in your resolve. "we'll just go for a little. have a drink or two, then y'can sleepover if you want." you do like sleeping over in felix's dorm. "and then tomorrow we can do whatever you want--study, watch a movie, dinner."
a sleepover and a saturday. this no longer feels like a loss. you smile, "deal."
felix's available hand finds your hip. "that's my girl."
the comment makes your face feel warm, you drop your head to rest on his stomach to hide any potential signs of being flustered. he'd tease you to no end about it. "i should get up, start getting ready."
he runs his hand down your back, "it's not until later." he moves his hand back up slowly. his thumb starts traces circles against your shoulder. "we've got time."
----
omg bestfriend!felix blurbs are everything to me,, if you have any thoughts about bestfriend-verse pls lmk,,
also?? might have to write a full fic for bestfriend-verse
taglist; @vader-is-hot @spiritofbuddha @getosangie @freyafriggafrey
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mattsrod · 5 months
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- ; MATTHEW STURNIOLO ; - ' MORNINGS '
✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪✪
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- ; warnings - smut, sub!matt, a little plot, masturbation, boners, interrupted sex.
- ; 9:05 am
your eyes were still glued shut with sleep as you rolled over in bed, throwing your arm to the right which hit your boyfriend in the stomach, of course.
matt shot awake, clutching his stomach instantaneously. after a few seconds of sputtering out swear words under his breath the said, "new way to wake me up, huh?"
you groaned in response, much too tired to give him a proper answer. the only thing on your mind was going back to sleep, but your boyfriend poking you in your side made that pretty difficult .
"matt, stop." you said curtly, grabbing his hand.
"your the one who woke me up, shouldnt i be mad?" he turned you over so you were facing him, taking a moment to look at all of your features.
"matt i can feel you staring at me." you spoke before opening your eyes. he was already staring into them. fuck. you wanted to be mad at him for not letting you sleep, but you couldn't.
he laughed before sliding his hand under your head, separating you and your soft pillow . you leaned closer to him and he kissed your lips softly.
he pulled away for a moment and you smiled. "come here." you said grabbing his face and brining it to yours, smashing your lips together.
you bit his upper lip and he licked your lower, and soon after his tongue pried your lips apart. he sat you up against the headboard, not separating his lips from yours for a second. he unclasped your bra, taking a tit in his hand.
every second that passed just made the kiss more heated.
your hands slid up and down his body as his tongue explored your mouth. just as your hands made it to his waistband you received a call, to which you ignored.
and then another call came.
and finally a text.
he pulled away, recognizing whoever was trying to reach you probably really needed you, considering the amount of times they had called you.
matt got off of you, letting you recollect and grab your phone.
"fuck." you mumbled
"what?"
"its my best friend. her dog ran away. she wants me to come over and grieve with her. probaly eat ice cream for three hours? i dont know.." you rambled on, shocked at the messages you had just received
"oh shit. you gotta get going then?" he yawned. handing you a previously discarded bra from the night before.
"i guess so." you slipped the bra over your head. "want breakfast before i leave?" you asked him, grabbing a pair of his pajama pants off of the floor and swiftly putting them on.
"i mean, why not?" he got out of the bed slowly ruffling his hair and then standing up.
you walked over to him, giving him a peck on the lips before walking out of the room "meet you downstairs yeah?"
"yeah." he paused, "your not putting a shirt on?" he said loudly, knowing you were far down the hallway by now.
"i mean its just us at home, right?!" you called back.
hearing that he smiled to himself. rushing out of the room and following you down the steps.
- ; time skip - 9:32 am
"matt, im gonna burn the fuckin' eggs if you keep staring at me like that." you shuffled the eggs around in the pan once more before turning around to look at matt, leaning your hands into the counter.
"what am i distracting you?"
"just let me cook your eggs in peace." you smiled.
saying that you turned around, you knew matt wouldn't let you do that.
you felt matts gaze burning into you as you walked over to the fridge to grab orange juice which you set on the counter next to you.
why not take advantage of this?
you opened the freezer and bent down to grab the mini pancakes you knew matt loved.
you arched your back as you stood up and turned around. "you want some of these, babe?" you held up the box of pancakes, waving them in the air.
your boyfriend traced your curves with his eyes. how his pants hung low on your hips, how your bra held your perfect tits.he was getting harder by the second. who gave you permission to do these things to him?
and then, looked up from the floor where he was pretending to stare, blinking and shaking his head before speaking "oh shit- sorry babe what'd ya say?"
"hm." you crossed your arms and leaned against the counter once again, sighing this time. "what am I distracting you now?"
"i gotta use the bathroom, be right back." he said coldly.
you pursed your lips and then shook your head. "you want the pancakes or not?!"
"yeah!" his voice cracked as he ran to the bathroom.
you giggled and turned off the stove. you knew exactly what he was up to.
matt bee-lined for the bed and threw himself on it, tossing most of the pillows to the floor and stuffing the remaining behind his back, before yanking his sweatpants down to his knees. there was no need to drag this out. he had enough foreplay just watching you downstairs, and not to mention the interrupted scene that morning that had been playing through his head for the rest of the time after that.
he grasped his cock firmly from the spot on his stomach where it had lay hard and wet-tipped against his stomach.
he gasped at the contact and let his head fall back, his mouth falling open as he squeezed himself, before letting his cock fall with a slap against heated skin.
with a flat hand, he pulled the moisture from the tip, smearing it down his length, before curling his fingers over his balls, just grazing his fingertips below them.matt ran his tongue over his dry lips, picturing you in the kitchen, remembering how you'd looked with your pajama pants hanging so low that just the slightest tug would pull them off.
he groaned and brought his hand around his dick again, tugging jerkily, frantically, and bent his knees, planting his feet on the bed.He could see you between his legs, one hand on his thigh, the other pleasuring yourself right along with him.
matt screwed his eyes closed and clamped his other hand over his own thigh, breathing hard and fast and stroking even faster.He imagined fucking you over the counter. both of you whimpering as he thrusted roughly into you, one hand gripping your hips roughly, leaving small marks. his other roped around to the front of your body, rubbing your clit.
the muscles in matts’s arms began to burn as he stroked himself but that barely registered, the only thing he could think of, the only thing he could see, was you beneath him.
him plunging into you and hearing your pretty noises.
your face as it twisted with pleasure.
He stroked himself long and hard, inside and out, his breath ragged and heavy and he knew it wouldn’t be long before his releass. he moaned loudy, picturing you against the counter once again. This sent him right over the edge.
with a loud cry of your name, his knees hit his shoulders as his belly strained and his hips thrust up onto his plunging fingers, his body pulsing around them, and quick lines of milky liquid squirted over his hand and the quivering skin of his stomach.
you opened the bedroom door and matts head snapped at the creaking sound it had made.
"huh. well this isnt the bathroom." you teased, making your way towards the bed.
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iknityounot · 5 months
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I am going to make this a separate post, since the other one got so long.
So, like I mentioned there, I sent my grandma's granny squares off to my Loose Ends "finisher" with the intent of giving my mother the blanket when it was complete. I had NO thoughts in my head at all for saving something for myself.
When I received the box in August with the completed blanket, it had two additional things in it. It had a letter and a bag. The bag had two and a half skeins of left over yarn (please peep the picture of all they yarn I sent this lady, I was SO surprised she was able to use so much of it!) my grandmother's crochet hook, and a single granny square. In the letter, my finisher, Katherine, wrote that she set aside one of the original squares my grandma made--she specifically said the one she guessed may have been one of the first--in order to put it in a central place in the finished blanket. But then she forgot about it when she went to put the blank together, so now there was one left over. She said she sent it along with the blanket, hoping it would still find a home.
So, like I said in my last post, I gathered up the blanket and brought it to my mom....but I kept that lone granny square for myself. I immediately knew what I wanted to do with it:
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I bought this little shadow box on Amazon, pinned in the granny square, and added my grandma's hook. I plan on hanging it in my little crafting zone in my apartment ❤️
Just another reason why the Loose Ends Project has my heart in a chokehold. There was so much thought and kindness that went into what Katherine did--for both me and my mom.
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steddiealltheway · 1 year
Text
Everyone thinks that Steve and Eddie hate each other. No matter how many times they insist that yes, they were once jealous of each other, but now they are friends, no one believes them. The whole party and even Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, and Argyle think that it's just some big joke that the two of them are friends.
Even with matching scars, shared trauma, and spending time together healing from both of those things, no one can wrap their heads around Steve and Eddie being friends. So much so that when they interact with each other, everyone insists that they don't have to pretend to like each other.
It gets to the point that Steve and Eddie have to hang out alone and avoid each other in group settings. "It feels like you're my secret lover or something," Steve jokes while staring up at Eddie's bedroom ceiling.
Eddie huffs a laugh while lightly strumming his guitar. "I'm not sure what we're going to do at Dustin's birthday party."
Steve sits up and looks at Eddie. "His what?"
"His birthday party this weekend," Eddie says still strumming. Steve stares at him cluelessly and that's when Eddie puts down his guitar. "Hey, I'm sure he just already thought he invited you," Eddie insists and gives Steve's hand a squeeze.
"Or he's having separate parties as if we're divorced parents," Steve groans. "I don't get it. Yes, in high school we were not friends and probably never would have been-"
"Ouch," Eddie interrupts and pretends he's been struck in the heart. He flops back on his bed and stares up at Steve. "You flatter me too much, Harrington."
Steve snorts, "Yeah as if you wouldn't have avoided me like the plague in high school if I tried to talk to you. Not that I blame you." He stares down and runs a hand through Eddie's curly hair. Soft.
Eddie hums and leans into the touch. He really is adorable. Steve thinks out loud, "I don't see how anyone could hate you."
"Except most of the town still."
"Anyone who knows you," Steve elaborates. Eddie just shrugs in response. Steve takes a moment to think to himself.
"What's going on?" Eddie asks.
Steve smiles and shakes his head. "Nothing."
"You stopped playing with my hair and there's worry all over that pretty face," Eddie flirts, but Steve is used to it by now equating it to Eddie's charm.
Steve looks down at him and brushes a strand of hair behind Eddie's ear. He hesitates before saying, "Do you think... Well, Robin said... I just- Never mind." He glances away before Eddie can read what's on his mind which seems to be a gift of his.
The mattress shifts slightly as Eddie sits up and puts a hand on Steve's cheek instantly soothing him. He raises his eyebrows and has the look in his big doe eyes that says you know you can talk to me.
"Do you think there's a weird tension between us?" Steve asks. "I mean, that's what everyone says when I ask why they think we hate each other."
Eddie takes a few moments seemingly considering the thought, but then he shrugs. "Not that I'm aware of."
Steve nods and leans forward until his head rests in the crook of Eddie's neck. "I'm going to have to convince Dustin that we can be in the same room together for this party, aren't I?"
Eddie chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of Steve's head. "I think you are especially since we haven't interacted in front of anyone for a few weeks now."
"Has it really been that long?" Steve asks turning slightly so he isn't basically mouthing against Eddie's neck. He feels Eddie nod and he huffs a sigh. "That kid is so stubborn."
"I think we're to blame for that," Eddie replies.
"Now we really sound like divorced parents," Steve says then sits back. "I've gotta go talk to him."
"I'll walk you out," Eddie says.
Steve doesn't remember when it became a thing for them, but he can't remember the last time Eddie didn't walk him to the door and hug him goodbye. Steve lingers in the embrace for as long as Eddie allows - which is always as long as Steve needs.
"Good luck," Eddie says as Steve pulls away.
"Thanks," Steve says and lingers in Eddie's space for a few moments longer. In times like this, he can feel the tension that Robin talks about, and he doesn't know why but it feels like he's missing something.
As he makes his way out the door with a parting squeeze to Eddie's arm he wishes he could talk to someone about it. Maybe Robin will stop thinking he's joking soon because for some reason he thinks she could help.
-:-:-:-:-:-
After a long conversation insisting he and Eddie could be in the same room together, Dustin finally gives in and invites him to the party. Then Steve has to get an even longer lecture about how he can't be rude to the Hellfire members no matter how much he hates Eddie.
Steve just brushes it off, but as the day of the party approaches, he gets more and more anxious. He really doesn't want to draw attention to himself and Eddie, but he wants to talk to his friend free of judgment. Eddie insists that things will be fine and this is their opportunity to convince people that they're friends.
For some reason it hurts Steve a little, but it's probably because his friends don't believe him and definitely not about him and Eddie just being friends.
He pushes that thought out of his mind by the time he approaches the Wheeler's house which was declared the ultimate party spot although Steve told Dustin his parents would be gone and he was more than happy to have everyone over. Maybe this party really is the time to show everyone that he and Eddie can more than tolerate each other.
Steve knocks on the door which quickly opens to Eddie on the other side. Without thinking, Steve does their usual greeting by hugging Eddie.
It's as if Steve punched him or something because the house goes silent.
"Okay, you two break it up. Just because it's my birthday doesn't mean you have to go out of your way to be nice to each other," Dustin says, pushing the hug apart before launching himself into his and Steve's handshake. Steve then pulls Dustin into a hug and rustles his hair while wishing him a happy birthday. Dustin thanks him and runs off to the basement following the rest of the group.
Steve glances over to Eddie who is staring at him in slight awe and what looks like a bit of confusion. "You've never seen the handshake?" Steve asks.
Eddie shakes his head, "No-" his voice cracks and he clears his throat. "No, I have not. It's..."
"Pretty nerdy, I know, but-"
Eddie holds his hand up and cuts him off, "It was sweet. You're um... you're really sweet to him. Hey, is it hot in here?"
"I think it's just me," Steve flirts with a big smile.
"I think it is," Eddie replies somewhat serious sounding.
Steve is about to flirt more when a loud ahem from beside them that Steve definitely recognizes interrupts. "Robin?" He asks before turning and giving her a brief hug. "What are you doing here?"
"Dustin invited me as a buffer," she answers honestly. "You didn't see me when you got in? I was obnoxiously waving for like a full minute."
Steve shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. "No, I was uhh... I guess I was distracted."
Eddie bumps his shoulder and says, "Do I distract you, Harrington?"
Steve rolls his eyes and bumps his shoulder back. "Go to the basement before you distract me some more, Munson."
Eddie winks before making his way to the basement, and Steve can't help but watch to make sure he gets there safely. If he's learned anything about Eddie is that he is a bit of a clutz.
"Oh my god," Robin says and smacks Steve's arm hard.
"Ow. What?" Steve says rubbing at his arm.
Robin gestures to the stairs and points accusatorily to Steve. "When did you and Eddie hook up, and why didn't you tell me?"
Steve snorts, "Really? You go from thinking we're enemies to secret lovers just like that?"
"Yes! Because I finally figured out the tension! I have to tell Nancy!" Robin says already running up the stairs.
"I knew you had ulterior motives!" Steve yells back and Robin turns to flip him off before she's out of sight.
Steve sighs as he hears yelling from down the stairs. Time to embrace the madness.
As he makes his way down the stairs, he can hear what sounds like an argument about some campaign Eddie had been telling him about. He spots El and Max first who huddle in a corner, rolling their eyes and whispering. Steve makes eye contact with them and gives them sympathetic looks.
He turns and finds Eddie standing on the couch, yelling down at Mike and Dustin who seem to be arguing about some character while the rest of Eddie's Hellfire friends try to interject in random ways. They all have slight smiles on their faces - especially Eddie - so Steve knows he doesn't have to break anything up.
That is until he spots Will behind them all looking off in slight distress. Steve knows it's been a bit hard for him to get back into things since he came back because not only was the whole mindflayer thing really horrible, but not being a part of Hellfire really made him feel out of the loop sometimes. Luckily, Lucas had his back and made sure to stick by his side since he could relate with the whole basketball thing.
When Eddie glances over, Steve shoots him a look and glances toward Will. Eddie takes the hint and clears his throat. "Well, it is Dusitn's birthday, so I guess I'll have to agree with him for today. But in our next campaign, there will be no room for arguments! Especially if I can get the infamous Will the Wise to help me with it."
Will gives Eddie a smile and seems to light up at the idea. "Yeah, I- I'd really like that."
Eddie hops off the couch and offers his hand out to Will who takes it and shakes it quickly. "Welcome to Hellfire. Now, what does the birthday boy have in mind?"
Before Dustin can respond, Lucas interrupts him and yells to the girls, "Get the tape!"
The girls comply and Eddie looks at Steve and shrugs then pats his lap. "Looks like there's one free seat available."
Steve laughs and rolls his eyes, but he ends up sitting in Eddie's lap as everyone stares. "What? I'm not sitting on the floor when there's an open spot."
"There's literally a free chair right to your left," Mike says.
Steve turns and looks. Sure enough, he's right. "We don't want El and Max sitting on the floor. Now what's this film about?"
"Yeah, what's the film?" Dustin asks.
Steve glances over to Will who has a small smile on his face. Steve suddenly remembers the camera Will had been sneaking around for the summer, and it all starts to add up.
El and Max return with a film that Max puts in the VHS player and announces, "Introducing some of our favorite Dustin moments."
Everyone laughs as Dustin watches in horror all the videos pieced together of him. Steve is surprised to notice he made the cut in a lot of them, but he's more excited when he sees Eddie.
Then, Steve tenses as he notices a video from Family Video that he didn't know was being taken. He recognizes the girl, and even worse, he recognizes the signature Harrington charm as he flirts with her. Dustin mocks him in the video, and he ends up running up to Steve and scaring the girl away.
Everyone around them including Dustin laughs, but Eddie tenses. Steve doesn't know why he feels the urge to soothe him so badly, but he finds himself whispering, "That was weeks ago, you can tell by the length of my hair." He doesn't know why he needs Eddie to know that, but he does. He reaches up and starts running a hand through Eddie's hair. "I promise, Eddie."
"I know," Eddie says sincerely and leans into the touch like he always does.
"Okay, why are you guys acting like that?" Dustin asks, and suddenly Steve remembers where he is and realizes everyone is staring at them.
Steve guiltily puts his hand down. "Like what?"
"Like you're in love or something," Dustin says. Steve freezes. In love. "You guys can cut the act and go back to avoiding each other. It's okay."
"We don't hate each other," Steve groans, "I don't know where you got the idea from."
One of Eddie's friends laughs, "We know Eddie and we know what you were like in high school. You two would never get along."
Everyone joins in agreeing, and Steve gets fed up. "Yes, we wouldn't have gotten along in high school! But things are different now!"
Everyone continues going on over Steve. Eddie looks at him and insists, "It's fine, Steve, they'll eventually come around to the idea of us being friends."
And for some reason, that's what makes Steve snap. He's not sure what overcomes him, but he raises his voice and says, "Just look how friendly we can be!"
Then, he cups Eddie's cheek and kisses him with everything he has. The room fills with silence again except for the tape that's still running, but the worst part is that Eddie stays frozen. Steve pulls back and realizes what he's done.
Eddie looks anywhere that isn't at Steve and says, "I need to go."
Steve stands up and lets Eddie run off.
Everyone stares at Steve in silence, but after a few moments, Max shoves Steve. "Go after him, idiot. This is what happens when no one listens to me about the tension between them being sexual!"
Everyone groans, but then Will joins in telling Steve to go after him.
Steve looks at Dustin who appears to be in shock and asks, "Can I go?"
It takes a few moments to process but then Dustin nods. "You can if I get credit for getting you guys together," Dustin replies with a big smile.
"I love you guys," Steve says then takes off as everyone yells at him to go.
Steve sprints up the stairs and runs into Robin. "Where'd he go?"
"The front door just- Where are you going?" Robin shouts after him as Steve races out the front door.
"I'm about to confront that tension!" Steve yells back and closes the door behind him. He looks in the driveway and notices Eddie's van is missing. But he knows exactly where he is.
As Steve gets into his car, he notices a few raindrops on his windshield. A glance up and he notices the sky looks like it is about to open up and completely flood Hawkins. "Well, this is great," Steve says sarcastically and quickly takes off toward Skull Rock.
He gets there in record time and immediately spots Eddie's van where he usually parks. By now it's pouring down rain, and Steve knows he didn't leave an umbrella inside his car. He looks down at his clean shoes and sighs, "Sorry guys, this is going to be worth it though. Why the hell am I talking to my shoes? Losing my mind..." Steve trails off as he takes off into the woods.
He finds skull rock easily and climbs it quickly managing not to slip on the slick rock. He finds Eddie laying in his favorite pit staring up at the sky. "Go away, Harrington," Eddie says not even sparing Steve a glance. His eyes are a bit red and Steve can't tell if the water going down his face is rain or tears. Probably both.
"Just hear me out," Steve pleads. "Just right now, and if you want, we can tell everyone they were right, and you never have to interact with me again."
"I don't want that, Steve," Eddie says barely loud enough to be heard over the rain.
"Don't want to listen?" Steve asks.
Eddie's lip slightly quivers and he sits up so Steve can't see him. "Don't want to lose you."
Steve walks closer to Eddie and sits behind him. "You could never lose me."
Eddie laughs humorously, "I think you will after I tell you this."
Steve's heart races as he asks, "Tell me what?"
Eddie takes a deep breath in and out. "I'm gay, Steve. And to make matters worse, I have had the biggest crush on you since before the Vecna shit, man. And you kissed me, and I just... I know I'm always going to want that. And I'm so sorry."
Steve's heartbeat is practically in his ears at this point. "You know that tension I was talking about a few days ago?" Eddie nods. "I've felt it since we first met. At first, I thought it was maybe hatred or jealousy, but then those feelings went away but the tension was still there. But tonight Dustin said the whole 'in love' thing and Max called it sexual tension-"
"She did what?"
"And I realized," Steve continues, "I think... I think I've also had a crush on you for longer than I even knew, but I could never find the words for it."
Eddie turns around and looks at him. "You don't have to lie to me."
"I'm not, and you know that I would never lie to you." Eddie raises his eyebrows. "Okay, except when you make food because sometimes it's really awful, Eddie."
Eddie snorts. "Kick a man while he's down."
Steve smiles when he sees a small smile on Eddie's face. "I really like you, Eddie. And I know how dramatic you are, so here I am in the pouring rain confessing my feelings for you."
Eddie laughs, and Steve stands up. "I like you!" Steve yells with his arms out wide. "Please tell me this is working!"
Eddie throws his head back as he laughs and then stands up and makes his way to Steve. He cups his face and says, "It's definitely working."
"Yeah?" Steve asks with a big smile.
"Yes, now kiss me again or it will no longer be working," Eddie jokes, but Steve is already leaning in and kissing him.
This time Eddie kisses back.
When they return later for cake, Dustin just shakes his head at them and says, "You could've told us you were hooking up the whole time."
Steve groans as he tries to towel dry his hair, but Eddie leans in and whispers, "Just go with it," before giving him a kiss on the cheek.
And although everyone insists that they knew they were hooking up the whole time, Steve couldn't be any happier.
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sukunas-wife · 1 month
Note
What about the idea that baby Yuuji overhears the screams in the bedroom and thinks Sukuna is hurting mommy?🥺Mommy's little protector. Or the baby asks why they need a collar on the bed, but the mother lies that it is for their future dog/cat. Sukuna is unhappy, but is forced to get a pet because Yuuji is too happy
Hehe pervert 🤭 I’m joking 🥹🤍 but I love the idea
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This is the first time your little sweet heart Yuji wasn’t by your side. Today his heart was set on following Uraume around, he was set on following him convinced at times of the day he was just a ghost who would vanish into thin air. Uraume didn’t have a problem with letting his young master follow him as long as he didn’t have to slow down his own business.
You’d see them cross your path a few times that day, Yuji always waving his chubby hand at you with a bright smile before running off to catch up.
The first time Sukuna saw you that day was just before midday, you were out in the garden under the plum tree fingers grazing the fruits you craved. He strolled over scaring you when you felt two of his hands on your waist, the third reaching up with ease to pull down the golden plums you struggled to reach.
“Thank you,” you reached up to his face bringing him down to kiss his lips, he bit at your bottom lip before he pulled away looking at you amused, “Where’s my son?” You turned to face him, smiling as your eyes moved away from him, “OUR son wanted to assure Uraume is not a spirit. Yuji is set on following them around from dawn till dusk.”
You looked back up at Sukuna, he brought a hand up to each side of your waist, “Is that so?” You felt like prey when he pressed you back against the tree, his third arm pressed over head against the bark, his fourth hand came up grabbing a strand of your hair running it between his fingers. “Well, now that you don't have our little brat with you, what are you going to do?” He leaned down closer to your face, his scent filled your air accompanied by his low suggestive tone, “More importantly what are we going to do together.” All it took in that moment was for his lips to meet yours while he brought you closer to his body, holding you close and whispering filthy words against your lips.
It was four or five hours past midday, one or two hours before dinner. Uraume was still on the move with purpose in their step and their mind set on completing whatever tasks Sukuna had assigned them that morning.
One of those tasks was to bring fresh robes to Sukuna’s separate chambers. Which lead Uraume to enter though your shared chambers and they would’ve gladly ignored the sound of wooden frame of your bed creaking. Not have batted an eye at Lord Sukuna’s muffled grunts and your quiet cries. Uraume, the master of “I mind my own damn business but I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS” went about business until they heard the small voice.
“Uwaume! Mommy’s crying! We need to help her!” Uraume quickly snapped around snatching up Yuji, “Don’t worry Young Yuji, your mother is perfectly-“ Both of them were cut off by the sound of wood cracking and a slam. Followed by Lord Sukuna’s voice reverberating clearly through the heavy wooden doors to your private chamber. The last thing was your weak voice saying Sukuna’s name. The string of curses and your name from his father had Yuji shoving his way out of Uraume’s hold and running to your doors.
Behind closed doors you almost peed yourself hearing the bangs on the door and Yuji’s screams. “MOMMY MOMMY ARE YOU OKAY!? DADDY IF YOUR HURT MOMMY IM IMA! IM GONNA…” the banging stopped, “LEMME GO LEEMMEEEE GGOOOOAAAGGGGHHHHHHH” you could almost see the way Yuji was kicking and squirming in Uraume’s hold.
Your heart was racing, and you took a deep breath, “Su,” you looked down at him where he was still laying on you. He looked up at you amused, “Your son just threatened me through a door for hurting you.” His chest rumbled as he let out a breathy laugh. You rolled your eyes, “OUR SON, just heard you trying to give him a sibling and your humoured that all that came from it was he was threatening you?” Your eyebrows raised with a slight smile, you were amused but still concerned for what your little Yuji heard.
Sukuna groaned rolling off your body to avoid crushing you entirely, your bed creaked and finished falling to the floor as the last two legs gave out. You tried not to laugh at Sukuna’s slightly widened eyes. “Your next bed will be one of those made of solid cedar. These raised beds are flimsy and break always.” Rolling over to his side you placed a hand on his chest, your head resting on his shoulder, “Or maybe, you shouldn't let your ego get so big and see if you can break every new bed you bring into my chambers?” Sukuna looked away, both arms on the side you were pressed up against holding you close, “I’ll think about it. Now come here, take that collar off before it taints your skin red.”
Almost an hour passed of Uraume holding Yuji like a sack of potatoes under his arm to keep him from running to your room. In that hour you briefly fell asleep under the graze of Sukuna’s hands. The red leather Sukuna had his name branded into was pulled off your neck and thrown onto your bed to be cleaned up later with your bed.
Waking up from your short rest you got up, Sukuna helping tie your Obi and managing to loosely tie your hair in a nice manner. Of course you couldn’t walk away from him without having your ass smacked. Your walking was cut short the moment you tried and couldn’t take more than a few steps and your own legs caving causing you to fall into your husband who was smirking down at you with lidded eyes. The puff in chest, pride in his lidded eyes, the smug “heh,” you almost missed made you side eye him. “You were the one who asked me,” he mimicked your voice poorly, “Please please fuck me Sukuna, give me everything.”
While he snickered he assisted in helping you sit in your shared chambers bed while poking and prodding at you and your sensitive bruising body.
Sukuna was chuckling to himself as he pulled the blanket over your lap, “I’ll call for Uraume or one of your little maids to bring you dinner. I’ll tell them you’ve fallen ill and it’s best to let you eat and rest.”
There you sat, watching your husband look back at you one last time with a faint smile before he left. You sat in the silence taking a breath, that was until you heard a familiar scream and the sound of little feet running in your direction, “OI BRAT! I JUST TOLD YOU YOUR MOTHERS ILL!” You laughed silently at Sukuna’s yelling, Yuji who let out a little grunt and shoved with all his weight against the wooden doors, “mmoommyy!!?!” He ran to your side of the bed doing everything to climb up, even pulling your blanket down so he could hold on and pull himself up. When he was finally on the bed he sat on your legs looking up at you with those big round eyes, “Are you okay?” His little hands came together, he was looking at you with so much concern it squeezed your heart making you wanted to kiss all over his face and fawn over him.
So you did, he laughed being pulled into your chest as you kissed all over his face and squeezing him in a tight hug that he did his best to hug you back. “Yes baby I’m alright, daddy and I were just having a discussion and you know your daddy.” Yuji laughed, eyes closing while he smiled big “hehe he breaks things.”
It wasn’t long before Sukuna walked in with one of your ladies, she was holding a tray with your dinner, Yuji bounced off your lap and onto the floor “Wanna go see what daddy broke.” You watched as he ran to your room, pushing past the door. Your lady in waiting helped you adjust yourself to be able to eat whatever was served. That was until you heard Yuji’s loud cheery voice “WERE GETTING A DOGGY!?”
You were confused as you looked at Sukuna and he seemed equally confused until you saw his eyes widen slightly before he went back to a neutral expression.
“Yuji, we are not getting a mutt.” You watched as he got closer to your door and you understood why he came to that idea, you looked down at your food feeling heat rise in your cheeks, “but it even had a name!” Yuji came running out of your room with the bright red collar in hand, an oval token hanging that said “Princess” . He had the biggest smile and was visibly excited.
Your lady in waiting was quick to dismiss herself as you waved her off, “We ARE getting a dog Yuji, come here.” You waved him over moving your tray off your lap, “Y/n- we’re not getting a- we are Ryomen.” You gave him a look and he gave you a look. You were both stuck in a stare off, the tension was there, “Ooouu that’s why daddy broke the bed, he can’t say no.” Sukuna looked taken aback, “I said no! And No is no!” He crossed his arms over his chest staring down at You and Yuji who sat in your lap holding the collar. Yuji looked up at you with a smile kicking his feet waiting to hear what you would say.
“Sukuna.” Your brows raised before you angled your head taking the collar from Yuji, “Why wouldn’t we get a DOG if we have a COLLAR.” you spoke through gritted teeth and he kept a hard stare on you, Yuji brought his little fists up to cover his smile, he was looking up at you with stars in his eyes, if anyone could bend his father like bamboo it was you.
Sukuna sighed and rolled his eyes, “FINE- but I'M choosing it, and NO ONE gets a say.” Yuji’s cheer of pure joy made him kick out his legs and throw out his arms. He was quick to hug you and kiss your chefs before running to his dad hugging his leg, “thank you daddy.” Sukuna couldn’t deny he had a soft spot in his soul for his son, especially when he placed a hand on Yuji’s head giving his head a rub. “Sure brat.”
A week had passed and you were outside with Yuji, he was using a stick like a sword attacking a tree making all sorts of sounds as if he were really fighting for his life.
“Oouuuuaaahhh” Yuji’s hands dropped to his sides when he saw his daddy emerge from the path.
“Mommy…” you were just as shocked. Here came Sukuna tether in hand. Until he got to both of you, “well?”
“Sukuna…” you looked at Yuji who looked excited, his eyes were wide and shining, his smile was big and his little fists were shaking in excitement as he stood there basically vibrating in excitement, “That’s not a dog..”
“IT'S A TIGER!!” You didn’t catch Yuji as he ran and hugged the tiger, your eye was twitching while he buried his face in the tiger's neck, his little arms not enough to encircle the beast.
“It’s better than a mutt,” you watched as he knelt, on arms resting on the tigers back, the other leaving firm pats on the tigers chest. Keeping the tether in his hand. “It’s tame also, she came from a palace where she was used to guard someone’s children, so she’ll take care of Yuji.”
You wanted to reject the idea just to hear Yuji’s little voice “I love you princess.” It squeezed your heart to see how cute he looked hugging her, she sat bringing one of her big paws over his shoulder like she was actually hugging him.
“I don’t think… I don't think it's good.- you hear that Yuji? I don’t think your mom wants us to keep her?” He looked at you while hugging Princess, his eyes started to tear up, dammit you never thought he’d use that against you, much less would it be that effective., “Please mommy?” He was looking up at you, and Sukuna was too, behind his son he had a sly smile, turning your plan against you, then there was princess, who looked up at you, purring while Yuji held on tighter, “Fine- but no Tigers on my bed, and maybe a new name… I don’t think the collar we have was meant for a fully grown… tiger..”
Yuji ran hugging you, “Daddy can get her a new collar and we can think of a new name like… like… lightning!” You snorted trying to not laugh, “Lightning is cute Yu, but I think she needs a better name.” He hummed, thinking while looking around, “What about lilies like the flower?” His little finger pointed past you, you turned to see the tiger lily he was pointing at, “It’s a pretty name if you like it.”
He walked over to Lily, his hands on her cheeks fluffing the tufts of fur, “What do you think lily?” The only response he got was Lily nuzzling his face with her nose, “I think she likes it.”
You looked at Sukuna and didn’t miss the smile on his face and the soft expression on his face. He loved his brat. You knew that he didn’t just find a tiger in some palace, he had to have already planned it to some extent.
Walking to his side you hugged his side, “I love you.” Doing your best with your free hand to pull him down, you kissed his cheek and he let out a “heh” sound. “So how long have you really had this planned?” You cocked a brow with a sure smile, “From the day of Yuji’s birth it was made known to me, one of those fools that live scared behind palace walls imported more than just a few.” You saw the smug look on his face and shook your head with a smile, “You are beyond belief.”
“LOOK” both of you turned to Yuji who had jumped on Lily trying to ride her, “Go lily go!” She only looked back at him and you looked away with a smile before Sukuna dropped the tether, “You heard the boy Lily.”
All you heard was Yuji’s scream when Lily started a decent pace run. Your mouth opened slightly, “su- he’ll be fine.” Was all Sukuna said cutting you off before wrapping both arms on his side around you. “Now, let’s talk about your punishment for defying me so openly in front of my son.” He took your jaw in one of his free hands, making you look up at him, those lidded eyes and sly smile made your nerves tingle, “Oh?”
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Here’s my shop btw 🥺
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kisakis-boyfriend · 8 months
Text
They have a wet dream in your lap - Genshin Impact pt. 1
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Pairings: Scaramouche/Wanderer, Xiao, Venti, and Aether x reader (separately)
Warnings: Male!reader, dom/top!reader, somnophilia, clothed humping/grinding
Genre/Format: Smut; Scenarios
Please check my blog title to verify whether requests are closed or not! Thank you!
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After a long day spent adventuring and completing commissions, you and your companion set up camp for the night. Opting for a secluded spot inside of a cave, the two of you cooked dinner together and chatted about your day and the plans for tomorrow. It was a particularly chilly night, even within the shelter of the cave and a small campfire you had cobbled together to keep you both warm, so your companion decided to cuddle up to you and fall asleep sitting in your lap
You didn't really mind, it had been a long day and snuggling up together would keep you warm throughout the night. Though when they began to stir in their sleep, you truly didn't expect what would come next....
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He was sleeping peacefully, a rare occurrence seeing as he didn't actually need to sleep the way humans do, when soft moans began leaving his lips. Wanderer was now squirming in your lap, grasping at the hand wrapped around his waist. Was he having a nightmare? You knew he was prone to those rather frequently...
The way his thighs squeezed together and the whine that filled the cave made you realize that this wasn't a nightmare... He was definitely having a wet dream, and with the way his ass grinded against you, you were quickly becoming aroused too
You tested the waters by placing a hand on his thigh, his head pressed back against your shoulder and he gasped in his sleep. Your hand trailed upwards until you brushed over his clothed cock, already semi-hard and dribbling a bit of precum, twitching from the tiny bit of contact
Wanderer humped at the hand that was now cupping his erection, applying just enough pressure to satisfy his needs. He continued rutting against you and you lifted your hips slightly, just to feel a bit of friction and press your own member against his ass
His thrusts sped up as he neared his climax, his breath tickling your skin as he released sweet moans into the crook of your neck. You hummed in satisfaction when you felt the growing wet spot from his orgasm, his muscles going slack as he relaxed against you once more
-
Xiao didn't like to sleep, preferring to watch over you all night while you get ample sleep. Tonight, however, you managed to convince him to rest with you. His back pressed against your chest, sitting between your legs while you leaned against the wall, you began to doze off once you were sure he had fallen asleep
You pressed your lips against his neck, leaving a few kisses and nuzzling closer, the soft gasp that left him next caught you off guard. You pressed another kiss to a particularly sensitive spot on his neck and Xiao suddenly moaned out your name
Considering how your darling yaksha usually ended up having terrible nightmares, you figured you would try to help him have a pleasant one for once. He whined when you began sucking on his neck, leaving marks on all of his sweet spots. Your hand slipped in his pants, quickly finding his arousal and palming him over his underwear
Xiao's hips bucked into your every touch, chasing every instance of contact in order to bring himself closer to orgasm. You pushed his underwear to the side and started rubbing him faster, massaging the head of his cock with your palm and using his precum as lube, creating lewd wet sounds as you jerked him off
Xiao cried out your name as he came all over your hand, his cum leaving a wet mess inside of his pants
-
The rain poured down, lulling the archon in your arms to sleep rather quickly. Venti had made himself comfortable in your lap, straddling your thighs and hugging you close, burying his face in your neck before dozing off. The sound of raindrops hitting the ground outside put you in a sort of trance, only breaking out of it when you felt Venti shift in your lap
It sounded like he whined in his sleep, but you weren't too sure since it was muffled. Then he shifted again, wiggling his hips and clutching your shirt tighter. Another whine escaped him, and you were sure that's what it was this time. He seemed restless, wiggling around more and more, rubbing his face against you like a cat
You whispered his name, your breath fanning against the shell of his ear, “Hey, Venti? Honey? ” That's when he suddenly thrust his hips forward, gasping at the friction. You were a bit taken aback by all of this, though still turned on nonetheless
How could you not be when your darling was making such sweet noises and humping you in his sleep? You couldn't just let him suffer like this. So your hands slid down his back until they reached his soft ass and squeezed, pushing him further against your clothed member
Venti instinctually began grinding against you, continuing to moan as you dry humped him back. The friction eventually tipped him over the edge, crying out your name as he spilled all over himself, your own orgasm following soon after. You were definitely going to tease him about this when he wakes up
-
Camping with him was a regular occurrence, you were traveling across seven nations with him, after all. Aether cozying up in your lap wasn't surprising either, the days were long and tiring and given how much you two had seen together, most nights he just wanted to collapse against you and drift away for a while
You held him close, arms cradled around his sleeping form and his head resting on your chest. He remained relatively still for several minutes, then he started squirming a bit, sighing and nuzzling his face into your chest. You rubbed his arm reassuringly, hoping that he wasn't about to have another nightmare about his sister
Aether's sighs slowly turned into what sounded like... moaning? Soft moans paired with his thighs squeezing together as he continued to stir in his sleep. It dawned on you that this might not be a nightmare... The sound of him calling your name drew your attention to his face, scrunched up in frustration
Aether grasped at your shirt, his hips bucking at the air. You took the unconscious hint and placed a hand in between his legs, he was already hard. He thrust into your touch, even with the layer of clothing dulling the sensation of your hand on him, he still cried out for you. You moved your hand along the outline of his dick, jerking him off as best as you could in this position
Your pace increased until Aether's hips stuttered forward, keening as he made a mess of his pants, your harsh stroking ceased and allowed him to go slack. You chuckled at how cute he was, desperate for relief even in his sleep. Kissing the top of his head, you adjusted yourself before squeezing him closer and drifting off to sleep
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Reblogs are extremely appreciated <3
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cheoliehansolie · 2 months
Text
Lip Balm
Summary: You and Seungcheol spend the day together in your apartment and he notices your not so subtle obsession with lip balm.
Word Count: ~1.7 k
Pairing: gn reader x Seungcheol
Warnings: none, but just know that lip balm is written a total of 22 times 🫠
an: If you like reading this, make sure to reblog! If you have any suggestions or you just want to talk, send me an ask 💕
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You and Seungcheol had been dating for a few months and one thing Seungcheol noticed about you is the fact that you kept lip balm with you at all times. He had grown accustomed to seeing you pull lip balm out of your backpack during lectures or while you were studying at the library. It seemed as though there was never a moment where you weren’t wearing lip balm.
The first time he noticed was when the two of you were sitting next to each other during class taking notes. He saw you rummaging through your backpack out of the corner of his eye. Distracted, he turned to look at what you were doing and he saw you applying lip balm to your soft, plush lips. It’s safe to say that for the rest of the lecture, Seungcheol was barely paying attention to the professor, instead choosing to take not so subtle glances at your lips every few minutes.
When you and Seungcheol went on your first date, he had taken you to a cafe on campus. The two of you had been friends for a few weeks before he asked you out, so he knew there wouldn’t be any awkward small talk, but Jeonghan had convinced him to do something simple and short for the first date just in case.
The two of you had finished your drinks and pastries but were having too much fun talking to each other to leave. Seungcheol was going on a tangent about how his roommates, Jeonghan and Joshua, were constantly teaming up to terrorize him. While nodding your head to show him you were listening, you opened your purse and grabbed your lip balm. You returned your gaze to your date and, while maintaining eye contact, applied lip balm to your lips.
It took every ounce of self control for Seungcheol to not lean across the table separating the two of you and place a kiss on your lips when you finished rubbing your lips together. 
Fast forward to today when Seungcheol came over to your apartment for the first time. Normally the two of you would go to Seungcheol’s place after classes since It's closer to campus, but since today’s a Friday Seungcheol decided to sleep over at your place. 
You and Seungcheol are cuddling on your couch watching a movie when Seungcheol loosens his grip around your shoulder and scoots away from you. You pout at him when you realize he’s trying to get up.
“Baby, don’t look at me like that. I’m just getting a glass of water and I’ll be right back.” he pouts back at you.
“Fine, but you better be back quickly.” you say as you untangle your limbs from him to let him get up.
Seungcheol can’t help but lean over and give you a quick kiss on your still pouting lips. You just look so cute sitting there looking up at him through your lashes with the cutest pout on your lips. The two of you can’t help it when you break away from the kiss and give each other the most love struck smiles.
Seungcheol makes his way to your kitchen and he wanders around, opening random cabinets to find where you keep the glasses. Could he ask you where you kept the glasses and would you immediately come help him find where they are? Yes, but you looked so comfy wrapped up in your blanket on the couch and Seungcheol couldn’t bring himself to ask. 
Luckily, he was able to locate the glasses on his second try and quickly poured himself a drink so he could return to the warm embrace of your arms as soon as possible. While he was chugging his water, he noticed a small pink tube on the corner of your kitchen counter. He sets his glass in the sink and looks closer at the small tube and he realizes it’s a tube of lip balm. 
Seungcheol slowly makes his way back to the living room where you’re (not) patiently waiting for him. He sees you returning a small tube, similar to the one he saw in the kitchen except this one cream in color, to the end table next to you. 
He smiles when you two are snuggled together on the couch again and the movie continues playing. He begins to wonder why you have random tubes of lip balm scattered around your apartment and he makes a mental tally of how many he’s seen thus far. Even if they don’t mean anything, it’ll be fun to tease you about your lip balm obsession.
A few hours later, you and Seungcheol are getting ready for bed. The two of you had spent the rest of the evening snuggling while watching movies, getting a few assignments done, and eating snacks together. Now you were in your bathroom doing your skin care while Seungcheol waits for you in bed, teeth brushed and ready to spend the rest of the night snuggling while you show him TikToks that you had bookmarked to show him tonight.
Seungcheol’s alone with his thoughts while he waits for you to join him in bed, and he starts reviewing how many tubes of lip balm he saw scattered around your apartment. It was honestly like a fun scavenger hunt for him to be able to see where you’ve placed them. He saw the one on your kitchen counter and the one on your end table while you were watching the movie, he saw one on your desk when the two of you decided to be at least a little productive and get some work done, he saw one in your medicine cabinet behind your mirror in the bathroom, and there’s one on your night stand. 
That makes for a total of five tubes of lip balm placed in seemingly random places around your pretty small apartment. Not to mention the lip balms he knows you have in your backpack and all of your purses. By the time Seungcheol finishes tallying all the lip balms around your apartment, you emerge from the bathroom ready for bed. 
While you get situated on your side of the bed, Seungcheol decides that now would be a good time to ask you about your lip balm obsession.
“Babe, I have a random question.” he says, waiting for you to acknowledge him while you get comfy under the blanket.
“What’s your question, Cheolie?” you ask, looking sweetly into his eyes.
“I couldn’t help but notice that you have tubes of lip balm in random places around your apartment. Is there a reason, or are you just so obsessed with lip balm that they’re part of your decor now?” he asks jokingly.
“Oh, those? I put them there so I can use them whenever I want. I like having lip balm on my lips so I don’t pick at the dry skin on my lips. It’s something I do when I’m anxious, but if I have hydrated lips, there’s nothing to pick at. Plus, even if I do have dry lips, I hate touching my lips when they have product on them.” 
“Why don’t you just put one in your pocket instead of having five around the house?”
“First of all, bold of you to assume my clothes have pockets deep enough to fit a tube of lip balm, that is if they have pockets in general. Second of all, I’m more likely to lose it if I take it everywhere with me. Knowing me I would leave it on a random table or it would fall out of my pocket and I would have no idea where it went.”
“You actually put a lot of thought into this. I thought you just kept them there for no reason.”
“Well, I just put them in places where I know I’ll want to use lip balm. But it’s also kinda for fun because I like the way they smell and I’ve been consistently wearing lip balm for so long now that it feels weird to not have anything on my lips.” you say.
Seungcheol smiles to himself as he listens to you explain. He loves listening to you talk, and he could listen to your voice for hours. But a sudden thought comes to his head and he smirks to himself as he himself is astounded by his brilliance.
“What flavor is the lip balm you’re wearing now? Can I try it?” he asks completely innocently where you don’t even realize what he’s planning.
“Yeah, I think it’s strawberry? Or maybe it’s cherry? I can’t tell. Here, let me grab it for you.” you say as you're about to turn to reach over to your nightstand to grab the lip balm that lives there.
Before you can turn your face away from Seungcheol, he grabs your arm and says, “It’s fine, I’d rather take it from here.”
Before you can fully process what he means, you feel his lips on yours and your stomach erupts with butterflies. This isn’t the first time that you’ve kissed, but you definitely were not expecting him to kiss you at this moment. His lips are soft against your own and the kiss is gentle. 
A few seconds later, you pull away from each other and Seungcheol says, “Definitely cherry.”
You feel heat rush to your face as you’re shy and flustered by his actions. Seungcheol laughs at your flustered state and you can’t help but reach over and smack him in the arm.
“What? You’re so cute when you get shy. Besides, you’re the one who said you like having things on your lips, so why not mine?” Seungcheol says, offended that you would hit your loving boyfriend who would do anything for you.
“Whatever.” you grumble as you try to calm your racing heart.
“I know you love me!” Seungcheol exclaims as he drapes his body over you, almost squishing you into a pancake.
You can’t help but laugh at his antics as you struggle under him.
“Yeah, you’re right. I do love you.” you say as the two of you burst into a fit of laughter.
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thatfandomslut · 3 months
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Regina George x Reader
Trigger Warnings: insecurity, underage drinking, jealousy, threatening language
Word Count: 1.8k
Request:
I saw the movie a day after it came out and I have been desperate for jealous Regina x reader. Like Cady tried at the party and BOOM Regina like smothers reader with kisses. Btw thoughts on the movie?
My thoughts on Mean Girls: Initially, going into it, I was nervous due to being such a big fan of the musical and move. I loved the movie, and I think the cast is amazing. I have seen it two times in theaters, and I will be going for two more times, at least.
(Y/n) adjusted herself in the mirror, determining whether she felt confident enough for the outfit she had chosen. However, Regina's words rang through her mind: "Honestly, babe, this costume would look so hot on you." Regina didn't know that she had chosen to go as a devil, decked in red with a horn placed on her head. She went all out, even adding a touch of red, glittery eye shadow. The outfit hugged her curves in ways that she wasn't sure about yet. (Y/n) sighed before checking the time. She couldn't back out of it now. It was officially too late, and after looking at Regina's current location, she saw that the girl was three minutes from her house.
Grabbing the purse and pitchfork she bought to accompany her outfit, she made her way downstairs in order to meet Regina at the door. It also gave her an extra minute to adjust herself in a different lighting. Hearing a honk from outside, she walked outside, spotting Regina's orange jeep, the chill in the air making her wish that Regina chose a vehicle with doors. She shot a quick 'goodbye' to her parents as she made her way over to Regina's Jeep.
"Hey, baby," Regina greeted, pulling her into the passenger seat with a smirk. (Y/n) grinned as Regina kissed her deeply, and (Y/n) got so drunk on the kiss that she almost forgot about Karen and Gretchen in the back. "You took my advice on the costume. You look hot, (Y/n)."
Due to the way that Regina's eyes raked over her body as she got situated beside her girlfriend, (Y/n) began to feel hot, too. Pushing her hair behind her shoulders as the wind whipped it around, she smirked. "Thank you, angel. You look very hot yourself. I'm glad I took your advice. It seems to match your costume very well, huh?" (Y/n) traced her eyes over Regina's angel costume. There was no question when determining how amazing Regina looked. She was the hottest girl in school, and (Y/n) often wondered what she saw in her. To others, Regina might come off as abrasive or angry, but she was never that way with (Y/n). She was soft and flirty, and she was whipped. (Y/n) was, too, though. Not only was she whipped, but she was absolutely in love with Regina.
As they got to the party, the bass could already be heard from the outside, and a girl in a corn outfit had just puked off the side of the porch. The action made (Y/n) curl her nose before following Regina in, hands latched together. They tended to stick together at events like these. Not just because they were in a relationship, but because of the boys around them. "I'm going to go find Jason," Gretchen called out, separating as Karen followed her as she often did. (Y/n) didn't mind them going off together, leaving her and Regina alone as they made their way to the kitchen.
Regina began pouring drinks for her and (Y/n), passing the red solo cup to her girlfriend. "You really do look hot, baby. You should wear red more often." Regina complimented as she set her drink beside them, keeping an eye on it. Her hands fell onto (Y/n)'s hips and she leaned in to kiss her. (Y/n) wasn't one to object to a kiss from her girlfriend, allowing Regina's lips to dance on hers with ease. The base kept them at a pace as they kissed, not caring about the people around them. They were almost secluded in the little kitchen area they were in. The two would've continued to make out if it wasn't for the screams that caused them to jump apart, some of (Y/n)'s drink splashing onto the floor.
(Y/n) quickly went to clean it as Regina narrowed her eyes to see what everyone was screaming at. "Oh my God, Cady looks horrendous," Regina commented, her eyes widening as (Y/n) stood up to see what was going on. She was someone who often defended Cady due to being so new to everything in America. After all, it was evident that she was very sheltered growing up. Regina texted Gretchen, who said Aaron had invited her to the party. "Interesting… Did you know that Cady likes Aaron?" Regina personally felt that Cady was out of her league, but it was whatever Cady wanted, not her obviously.
"Really." (Y/n) said, drinking the contents in her cup before getting a refill. "I wouldn't really have expected it. I think Cady might be too pretty for Aaron of all people. I kind of thought she might like Janis since I've seen them talking a bit. Or, maybe she and Gretchen?"
Regina and (Y/n) tended to try to pair people up with each other for fun. Cady wasn't the exception to that. "Speaking of Gretchen, she's going to be upset if she sees Jason making out with that girl over there. I'm going to go break it up, but I'll be right back," Regina kissed (Y/n) before going to tell off Jason before Gretchen noticed. (Y/n) smiled at her as she walked off, grabbing her drink to keep it safe as she approached Gretchen and Cady.
"Hey, ladies," she greeted with a soft smile. Gretchen was about to respond until she watched Karen from a distance do something she wasn't supposed to. Quickly excusing herself, she ran over to the other girl leaving just Cady and (Y/n). "So, Cady, how are you enjoying North Shore so far? Find anyone you might be interested in yet?" (Y/n) just knew that there was no way that Cady had a crush on Aaron. He wasn't unattractive, Cady just was more attractive. Leaning in slightly, (Y/n) smiled widely. "You can tell me, I promise not to tell anyone. I am like a vault, you know?"
Cady blushed at her question, thankful for the abundance of makeup her mother helped her apply. However, even if (Y/n) couldn't see the blush, she saw the shy fidget. "Yes, actually, but Gretchen and Karen told me not to do anything about it. But… She is pretty cool." Cady answered, taking a small step forward. (Y/n) almost jumped up excitedly at the fact that Cady just confirmed her crush wasn't on Aaron. Now, she was thinking she was right. Cady had to like Janis if not Aaron or Gretchen. She only took Gretchen out of the equation because Cady confirmed she had told her who it was. Cady might be a brainiac when it came to math, but (Y/n) was the best matchmaker on campus.
Too bad she didn't realize that Cady was insinuating her. Sipping the alcohol in her cup, she leaned back a bit to examine Cady, trying to figure out who it was. "Oh, come on, Cady. You can't always listen to Gretchen and Karen, no matter how amazing they are. I say if you like them, you should go for it. Is this person here at the party? Do I know them?" (Y/n) glanced around, seeing Regina return from pairing Jason back up with Gretchen. This was a task she hated doing, but she knew Gretchen was head over heels for Jason for some reason.
"Yeah, she is actually, and you know her very well," Cady answered, placing a hand on (Y/n)'s wrist since her hand was full. (Y/n) was now suddenly very aware of who she was hinting at. Unfortunately for Cady, Regina was now right next to (Y/n) and kissing her deeply before sending a death glare to the girl in a black wig. (Y/n) shook off Cady's hand gently, taking a step closer to Regina who wrapped a hand around (Y/n)'s waist. Cady looked shocked, dejected, and embarrassed. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have… I should go."
Regina provided a sickly sweet smile at this. "Yeah, Cady, there's no hard feeling or whatever, either. Just next time, hands off my girlfriend. I hope your night gets better." Regina said, taking one of the drinks from (Y/n), waiting for Cady to make her way away from them or out of the house. As Cady practically rushed out the door, Regina felt herself crushing the red solo cup before releasing it and replacing it.
(Y/n) didn't feel bad in the sense of Cady's feelings towards her, but seeing Cady sad made her feel bad. But it was awkward now that she had practically admitted that she had feelings for her without saying it. "Regina, I'm sorry. I didn't realize until she took my wrist that she was coming on to me." (Y/n) apologized, hoping Regina wasn't mad at her. She had never made Regina mad before, and she didn't want to.
"It's not your fault that Cady can't keep her hands to herself. What were you two talking about anyways?" Regina questioned, drinking a sip of the alcohol in her hands. She knew her mother would come to pick them up and have someone grab her vehicle in the morning, so she wasn't worried about drinking. Plus, now she needed the drink having witnessed the girl she was trying to help fit in touch with her girlfriend. She was jealous, and she didn't want anyone touching (Y/n) that way ever. "It must've been pretty good seeing as Cady felt the need to grab your wrist. It looked like she was about to kiss you."
(Y/n) finished her second drink as she ran a hand through her hair. "We were talking about how she had a crush on someone, and I was trying to get it out of her. I didn't know it was me so I said go for it, and then when she grabbed my wrist, I was like 'oh, shit.'" (Y/n) explained, hoping Regina believed her. She was telling the truth after all, and Regina was really good at reading the truth about people. Especially (Y/n), not that (Y/n) really ever lied. It was more so little white lies like 'Oh yeah, I totally didn't just take a three-hour nap, I lost my phone.'
"Okay, baby, I believe you. But if Cady ever tries that again, she won't get another chance to be a part of our group, and she will be a social outcast. I will not let her think that she can touch my girlfriend and get away with it." Regina glared at the exit as if Cady might re-enter. Regina then took (Y/n)'s hand. "But let's forget about that and her. Let's just go to my house. We can watch Halloween movies and make out if you want?"
(Y/n) smirked at the offer, nodding slightly. "You know what, you got a deal, angel. Let's do it."
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