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scienceoftheidiot · 1 year

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Find the Word Tag Game

I was tagged by @residentdormouse ! Thank you dear 😊

My words were : calm, frantic, joy, sadness, anger

It’s pretty funny that it makes me realize I very rarely use these words in plain to describe emotions. Like. Really, they were hard to find. I don’t know what it says about my writing (that I use too many adverbs, I know, I know, but you can pry them from my cold dead hands, thanks). (Also, so much for thinking Desden is an angry arse. There’s no occurrence of the word "anger" in the 9 chapters I translated into English. This man is the personification of serenity. Yeah. Yeah.)*insert hedgehog emoji*

Ah and ! I’m terrible at titles and all my titles are FUCKING LONG like the good french idiot I am !

I tag : @residentdormouse (right back at you!) @heirsoflilith @qs63 @riotbrrrd @musing-and-music @littleragondin @dairogo @goneadrift and this tag is open, please do it and tag me even if you're not tagged, so I can read your stuff !

And your words are : smile, dream, tear(s), dark, soft

Some original stuff and fic WIPs under the cut.

Calm - Dead men talk way too much (Original story), Chapter 4

The door from his bedroom to the living room was wide open – out of the way. He got out, and stayed in the doorway. Kalinka was still barking, but the man was now just making crying sounds. Not very frightening, for an armed robber or a mafia killer. Desden’s left hand, the one that was not holding the door frame to the point of cracking it, was shaking terribly. He closed it in a fist, clenching his teeth under the pain from his wound, and went on. He surprised himself with how steady and calm his voice sounded:

“What the hell is going on in here?”

Kalinka immediately shut up and emitted a low growl instead. Even if he knew it was not directed at him, Desden couldn’t help being a little frightened by his dog. She had never acted like that before. That was the second time this kind of thing happened in a week.

“Please, take that dog away, please.”

Frantic - Everyone learns faster on fire (FMA Royai fic - fully posted on AO3)

His last comment had been a reference to her father, that had boiled under the surface for some days. She'd acted with Mustang as she had acted with her father, catering to his every needs, getting everything ready in advance for him, growing more frantic about it as time passed and her General had become more frustrated. It was a vicious, never ending circle. She was able to understand now, to look at it with a somewhat clinical eye, but in front of him, she’d been completely blindsided.

Mustang wasn't a bedridden, dying old man.

And he wasn't her father.

"Do you want a drink, Roy boy?"

Joy - President Grumman’s little puppet theater - (FMA Royai fic - WIP)

No occurrence of joy by itself anywhere. So you get “joyful”

"Yeah," he said as he followed her, seeing her reaching for her finest gin. "No alcohol, please. Just, fresh water or, whatever."

He placed the little suitcase at his feet and sat at the bar, his right hand massaging the palm of his left. It wasn't that painful after all these years, but it had become a habit. It soothed him. And he felt he needed so, what with the pointed look Chris gave him.

"Here," she sled a glass of juice towards him on the counter. "Try this."

It was just a glass of orange juice, bright in colour and strong in smell. A good smell. Roy drank a sip, and it felt like the most tasteful thing he'd ever drank. Maybe it was that the food in prison was, well, prison food, or maybe it was because everything since he was out felt and smelled and looked brighter and stronger than it had done in years. But the orange taste was perfect, the amount of sugar just enough to feel sweet but not overtly, the whole thing so flavorful he thought there was something else. He put the glass down, looking at it, enjoying the aftertaste on his lips.

"That thing is… great."

Chris smiled, and he smiled in return.

"Ishvalan oranges. First harvest in twenty years. I felt it'd make you happy to hear that."

Roy looked at the simple glass of orange juice on the counter, its bright, joyful colour, the sweetness of it lingering on his lips.

"Yeah. It does."

Sadness - FMA Royai fic WIP (codename dismissed Roy)

No occurrence of “sadness”, so you get “sad”.

Anger - FMA Royai WIP (codename Ishval)

The major's arms curled around their necks like constrictor snakes. Riza tapped on the prominent biceps to make him let go, but Alex was on a roll. "It is such a sad thing you had to be dismissed –"

"Alex," Roy's strangled voice rose on Riza's right, "if you don't let go we'll both be dismissed for being very dead –"

" – but love overcomes all obstacles –"

"Major!"

Mustang walked between the piles of crates, effectively hiding them from people who would enter the tent directly. Then he turned around and folded his arms.

Hawkeye looked miserable, her eyes low, her face gaunt. Mustang felt his anger ebb at this sight. But he just couldn’t believe it.

“What the fuck, Hawkeye ? I’m stuck in hospital, don’t see you for a couple of weeks, and I find you in the middle of the camp with your gun to the head of a fellow soldier, trying to defend my honour ? One of Kimbly’s men, on top. This is going to bite us in the arse, you can count on that. Bite me in the arse, more surely, and I’m not even your superior.”

“I’m sorry, sir.”

He didn’t want to rub salt into her wound, but he had to say it. Because it was probably what had surprised him most. So he took a more gentle voice.

“Worse, though. Your hand. Your gun, it was shaking. What happened?”

#tag game #writing #wips #find the word tag

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captainfightingflower · 1 year

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Hi friends! Can someone go into my DMs and describe the characterization of Rue Meringue, Professor Nanners, Nikolas Knacklus & the Quixort hostess in excruciating detail for me?

I want to make more content featuring The Jackbox Party Pack 9 hosts, but interacting with the actual games themselves causes me excruciating physical pain, not to mention that i have an irrational seething hatred for Nikolas Knacklus & whenever i see Professor Nanners in motion i can't stop myself from suddenly crying in distress for unknown reasons. Also do not send me any voice lines for Rue Meringue, i ask of this for personal reasons, not that i hate how she sounds or anything, i just don't want you to send me their voice lines in particular.

Also please do not send me your headcannons about them until after you've finished telling me about the cannon facts regarding all 4 hosts that you know of, after you finish info dumping me about all of the cannon facts you know about: i'll gladly listen to your headcannons! I just don't want cannon & headcannon getting all mixed together and stuff (you can put an emoji or something next to the cannon fact if you got a headcannon relating to it if you want). I also do not care about the nature of the facts, so you don't need to put content warnings before any iffy facts (i know how fucked up they can get).

Thanks so much in advance! You can take as much time as you want with dispersing the facts, i'll look over them all in my own time and add them to my reference folder. Please put the facts in my DMs and not in my ask box, i cannot stress this enough, i want the facts to be sent to me via Tumblr Direct Message. Again, thanks in advance!

#Jackbox games #the Jackbox party pack 9 #roomerang #nonsensory #junktopia #quixort #looking for lore dumper!#very weird request: but a request all the same!

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sandundersun · 3 years

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Everyone has a Downside, He isn't Excused

vernon x reader || romance || 1.3K words

warning: mention of blood

tbh this is not really romance, it’s a short description of hansol’s life

He was probably the weirdest and the toughest man you passed by in life.

He wasn't afraid of any extreme entertainment; haunted house ride, skydiving, any kind of spice, putting water in extremely hot oil, walking as if he owned the hall when he was ten minutes late to class. He gave a little to no fuck about challenges in life. If his parent put him in a sports club on his younger day and he chose to be a long jump athlete, he probably would be good; or you could send him as a shepherd with no internet connection for two months and he would come back with no scratch; it was some strong kind of endurance partnered with adaptivity, or witchcraft.

So, maybe, maybe that's why God gave him a little downside—that could kill him in a colossal amount but on a usual day it was only mildly annoying.

The boy was allergic to mundane things you stumbled upon in everyday life. He was hardly enjoying springtime when the grass became less green and more colorful, as flowers blossom here and there, because the pollen made his eyes itchy; he couldn't eat peanuts, where it came in so many delicious snacks and foods; he loved cat to death, he probably would have a dozen if it wasn't for his busy life, but he was kinda allergic to them. It was comedy.

Plus, this stupid reckless boy, who was brave enough to punch someone in the face for messing up with his sister or friend, constantly had a wound on his lips; not because of chapped lips and sun combo, nor because of the fighting he had once in a while. This boy just felt like, eh, it's a good day to bite my lips until there was blood on it, and he needed to put an ointment, stay calm for a while and, oh hello another good day; a fridging vicious and addictive cycle.

Though—at first—you didn't understand in the littlest bit of why it became a "cycle".

"It's a reflex," he said. "I don't know, I just bite it when I find something cringe or funnily dangerous."

Except, anything his peer group said or did was cringe or funnily dangerous; from talking with a lovey-dovey tone in public like a romance classic novel to coloring someone's eyebrows with red chili paste—his mates was, suffice to say, insane.

The first time his lips got sore after you dated him, he sent you a chat with a crying emoji and an "aw" , followed by a picture of a drop of blood—as a proof because he was like some kind of an indestructible god until now. It was alarming. You saw blood, meaning pain, and you hurriedly jumped out of your bed, going to a store, and knocking on his door.

The sight in front of you was not what you foresaw.

Well, there was someone who was tired and in—a bit of—pain, and the other was the happy healthy one, but he was the fine one. Standing while hugging his orange cat Leo, with a small scar, yet super red; a little lost.

"Oh, hi!" He welcomed you and ushered you to sit on the couch. "I didn't know you'd come."

"Well, I brought you a compress for the scar," you said, "you sent me a pic and I thought it was painful?"

"Yeah, for five seconds, it's fine by now."

That was one of the oddest and funniest excuses you heard in a whole year, and just like that, your effort went to waste—in your defense though, that was also the first time he sent you a crying emoji.

You sighed out loud, meanwhile, in a flash, he gave you a kiss and a hug and the damn cat was trying to keep it civil with you.

"Thank you for the ointment, by the way. I'll keep it for the next one."

"The next?"

"I get this once in a while."

Glad you bought two because once in a while meant 24/7/365.

Dear God, sometimes you wondered, why were you worried for a man that should barely survive the world, but was actually thriving in life? Seriously, if someone hated him, they could just lock him in a greenhouse or sneak up peanut on his meal, and get done—well, he was an awesome person, so perhaps no one disliked him that much, but—you believed some super force magic must be circling around Hansol.

You should just stay put and enjoy the day—like him.

It wasn't easy.

It took time for you to not get panicked every time his lips bled. For the first fifth time, you bought him a new ointment and compressor; by the eleventh, you tried to breathe and mumbled it's fine, it's just a scratch. It was annoying for you too though, worrying for a grown-up man who made biting lips his habit. But after the twentieth, you had let it go. For someone as pretty and as magnificent as him, this one addiction simply served as a reminder that no one is perfect except God.

Well, another downside, you could go with no kissing for days, sometimes a full week if his scar kept reopening.

Not that it mattered that much though.

You can still kiss him on his eyes and nose and cheeks, and he would press his lips in return, on your knuckles and arms and stomach—though not as strong as you. And his love surging through his hands on your arms, whisper in your ear, and everything in him that was all around you.

Anyway, the third time it happened, you slept in his apartment. It was half-healed at the time you arrived and instantly got better.

His olive-colored sofa was soft and fluffy and comfortable, you probably had been there for almost three hours, devouring the melancholic novel in front of you, with five minutes breaks two or three times to get another drink or go to the bathroom. The sun was barely seen on the west when he snuggled up on you, made you—forcefully—put down your book and wrapped your hands around him instead.

"What?"

"Nothing." He buried his head deeper on your chest, voice muffled. "I just miss you."

"I've been sleeping in this apartment for two days," you ruffled his dark brown hair, "what kind of missing?"

He sat up and let out a witty smile, then he brushed your lips with his. "Missing to kiss you."

You laughed at the rare sight of him being so soft and spoiled. Your fingers voyaged to his jaws, thumbs softly brushing the corner of his lips. The rashes weren't as bad as the first time, it had become flat and the color faded into soft pink.

"Doesn't it hurt?"

"Yep." And he leaned closer to give you another light peck.

"You said it hurts?"

Then another kiss, not quite a peck right now "It does, very faintly."

You pulled yourself and gave a look what are you doing. "Hansol ..."

"Oh, come on. The bit of pain dawns on me after I kiss you, I can't feel it when your lips are on mine. So maybe,"—two kisses, short and sweet—"maybe we can kiss all night long so I don't taste the pain."

And he was gone for the long endless kiss before you could deny any of it. Left hands wrapped your neck, fingers crawling on your back, chest going against each other. You wanted to let go yet wanted his desire too, and in the end, you succumbed.

Well, maybe the aftermath of his habit wasn't that bad.

note: this was supposed to be a short writing under 500 words after my friends talked about Hansol’s constant wounded lips, I thought it was from his allergy, but people said it’s his habit of biting lips lmao. So, I just kept typing and typing describing him and a bit of seventeen dynamic (ofc edited a bit), and end up with 1.3K rambling and a little romance

#caratwritersclub #vernon #hansol vernon chwe #vernon chwe #vernon x reader #vernon scenario #vernon imagine #vernon fic #vernon drabble #vernon fluff #mine:svt #mine:writing

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mrs-dynamight · 3 years

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Be Nice To Me 4

Part 3

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Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x fem!Reader, Denki Kaminari x fem!Reader

Warnings: Eventual mature content, angst, hurt/comfort, love triangle, the reader is lowkey toxic, everything will be adressed in every episode (:

Chapter warning: Just a single curse word.

Chapter: 4/? I'm sorry, this is going to be long :c but I just loooove writing it

Synopsis: You're in love with your best friend Bakugou, and you're cofessing to him but things get a lot more complicated when Denki starts to treat you different *wink wink*

Word count: 1.6k

Author's note: This is a little bit shorter, but it's pure fluff, and the next one is going to be so long they will compensate eachother, hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 4 Bloom- The Paper Kites

I was floating in cloud nine, everything I have ever dreamt of suddenly became true, there he was, the boy of my dreams liking me back, what else could’ve I asked for? Maybe a little more time together before he’s gone.

The doubts in my heart were getting more difficult to ignore with every passing minute, we came back to the dorms like two hours ago but I was incapable of going to bed, let alone trying to sleep, there was so much to think about, were we a couple? I’ve never had a boyfriend, I don’t know how these things are supposed to work, we like each other, that’s all that it takes right? A long-distance relationship? I’ve heard that those never work, or should we wait for him to come back to make it official? Aren’t we already official? We’ve kissed, like a lot, there was even some tongue; ugh those thoughts made me feel so embarrassed.

The light of my home screen lightly illuminated the room, and with my blushed cheeks I went to check who was messaging me, it was Kaminari, I opened the text that reads “R u awake? I had a nightmare and I really could use a hug from my bestie rn” followed by five crying emojis; “See you in the place” said my reply, the place was this empty service room in the rooftop of the dorms, nobody ever used it for anything so it is completely empty, we made a copy of the key one day that we had to clean the entire dorms because a certain yellow-haired guy decide to play “potions” in chemistry class, and since then it’s been our hiding place, it had everything that we needed, a lot of junk food, fairy lights, a portable speaker, blankets and an Opossum holding a cigarette poster in one wall; whenever one of us needed a break from the outside world we came here, this is our safe space.

I opened the door to the place and saw Denki standing there, he looked so tiny and vulnerable, I hugged him instantly, the dim fairy lights in the opossum wall made his facial features even prettier, it was obvious he had been crying, I didn’t asked any question and he didn’t said anything, we just hugged for what it seemed like hours, with a heavy sight he pulled apart and give me smile

-Thanks Y/N I really needed that- Said Denki with his hand in my cheek and his eyes fixed in some point between us

-They’re back, aren’t they? - I asked with concern

He nodded and lied in one of our blankets in the floor, I did the same, we both were looking at the glow in the dark stars glued to the celling not saying a single word, he held my hand and started to cry

-Why do they keep coming back? I don’t wanna be afraid anymore- I knew exactly what he meant, he had a recurrent nightmare, a big fight against villains, every one of us dying in awful ways, he is always the last one to die, and before that there is always someone telling him that he is the weakest of us, that this was all his fault for not being enough.

-Your mind is playing tricks on you, you are not weak, I know I’ve told you that a gazillion times, but I’m willing to do it a million more, all the times you need it, I’m here, we are all safe and sound, you have nothing to worry about- Anytime the nightmares come back I make sure Denki knows he’s just as strong as any of our other classmates, that he’s smart and capable of being a great hero.

-I want to be able to protect you, I don’t want you to die- Said Denki facing me and locking his eyes with my own.

-I promise you, I’m not going to die in the hands of a villain, I’m going to die being the coolest grandma in the neighbourhood, doing a sick backflip and daring Satan himself to come for my soul- I said to make Denki laugh, and apparently it worked

-You’re my best friend Y/N, I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t here, please never stop being like that-

-Being how? -

-I don’t know, funny, smart, a real pain in the ass to the villains and the teachers, a stubborn whiney stuff-

-Are you sure you aren’t describing yourself? –

-Nah, I didn’t said the most handsome man who ever walked the earth, but you’re not bad looking-

We both laughed, I really enjoyed being around Denki, his presence always felt comforting, like coming back home after a long trip, or eating your favourite homemade dish after a rough day, like a cool late summer breeze, he makes my heart warm and my troubles go away, I never feel more like myself than when I’m around him. That’s what friendship feels like, right?

-Could you do me one last favour Y/N? – Denkis voice took me out of my own mind -I don’t want to go back to my room and have another nightmare, I don’t wanna make you unconformable or anything, but could I sleep with you? -

It definitely took me by surprise, we had a lot of sleepovers over the years, but never just the two of us

-I understand if you say no, but I promise I just want to sleep, and having you around makes me feel safe-

-I have an idea, let’s have a sleepover here in the place, I’ll put one of those white noise videos that last hours, so you don’t have to think about anything-

-I’ll set the alarm to get up early and go to our dorms before anyone sees us, thank you so much Y/N, I’ll make it up to you, I promise-

-You don’t have to; I know you’ll do the same for me-

-You’re an angel but with no wings-

-So, like a person? –

-Shut up Aubrey Plaza-

We were both lying in the blankets on the floor, our heads at the same level (look at the reference above) and I was slowly falling asleep, all I could hear was the white noise and Denkis soft breathing, I closed my eyes and just before I completely lost my consciousness and succumb to the tiredness of my body I heard it, Denkis soft voice, “I love you Y/N”. I turned my head to look at him with my heart racing miles, but he was deeply asleep. Maybe I just imagined the whole thing, it probably was my tired mind, I took one last look to the boy next to me, sleeping so peacefully and with a little smile in his lips feeling the same familiar warmth in my soul, is this really what friendship feels like?

The alarm went off exactly at 5 am, I woke up and it took me a moment to realize that I wasn’t in my dorm room, then I remembered Denkis nightmare, our sleepover, and that thing I thought I heard. I had to wake Denki up so we could go to our respective rooms without Aizawa founding out we were out of our rooms at night, or even worse that we had the keys of the place. I sat there and moved Denki to wake him up. He opened one eye and whined

-But moooooom, it’s Saturday, I don’t have to go to school-

-Come on Denki we have to go to our rooms-

-Five more minutes- He said and hugged my leg

-Do you want Iida to found out we didn’t sleep in our rooms and telling Aizawa? -

And just like that he got up and started heading to the door

-Shit, you’re right, come on, you know that guy wakes up hella early-

We were in the stairs heading to our rooms, and although we were on Denkis floor, he kept climbing down the stairs with me.

-You don’t have to escort me to my room Denki-

-Oh but I want to- Replied the yellow haired guy

When we were in front of my door he leaned down and planted a chaste kiss in my forehead.

-Thank you for being there for me, I will remember this night for the rest of my life- And he turned around without waiting for a response disappeared heading towards the stairs.

I stepped into my room with a heavy cloud around my mind, there was so many feelings inside me that I couldn’t even tell them apart, where do I draw the line between friendship and love? Between admiration and affection? Between what I feel for Bakugo and what I feel for Denki?

I closed my eyes and remembered everything that happened yesterday, Bakugos confession, our shared kisses, the promise we made, six months apart now sounded a lot more crucial, after all the things that could happen in the matter of a few hours. Did I just said that because the heat of the moment? The words Bakugo said to me sounded so mature and logical, not like my own thoughts right now, am I just a slave of my own feelings? How would he react if he were me? What about Denki? Was he aware of all those years after his friend? And what if he knew and that is the reason why he hasn’t told me anything yet? Maybe I was just overthinking the situation, nothing was written in stone, neither my relationship with Katsuki nor Denkis feelings for me. I was getting tired of my own thoughts running in circles and not coming to an end, so I wrapped myself in the sheets of my bed and prayed for my mind to shut down so I could get some rest.

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Part 5

Heeeey I just wanted to thank all of you who read my work, LY, the next few chapters will be like an episode of skins UK, soo be warned, also there is going to be some thirst but nothing too explicit because I'm a shy motherfucker. Enjoy the last chapter free from Mrs-Dynamight Drama™

Taglist: @mikasalt

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gaemkyuu · 3 years

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I’m Right Here (Owen Joyner x Fictional Character

Warnings: anxiety attack and self-deprecation A/N: Sorry this one took so long! The fictional character has been shamed for her anxiety from her parents. The experience of an anxiety attack is based on the ones I have. It’s different for everyone. Disclaimer: This is a FICITONAL writing piece! In no way do I claim characters in this piece act this way in real life.

Masterlist *now taking requests ;)

I’m Right Here

“Hey Jade! Wait up!” Jade was walking out of her trailer and on her way to her car, until she heard Owen call out for her. She paused and turned around to face the tall blonde, who stopped in front of her slightly out of breath. He bent slightly over his knees, catching his breath and still in costume.

“Aren’t you supposed to be filming a scene right now?” she cocked her eyebrow at him and rested a hand on her hip. They were on set filming for Julie and the Phantoms season 2, and Jade was brought in as a minor character as a part of Carrie’s posse. She didn’t have any major dialogues save the one or two quips her character had, so she was mostly there for the dance portions. That often meant she was able to leave set earlier or she had less days on set than others.

“Yeah, they’re setting up, but I wanted to catch you before heading out” Owen started to shift his weight from leg to leg and began to avoid eye contact. Jade felt butterflies in her stomach but immediately tried to suppress them, knowing that what she hoped was happening was probably not. She didn’t want to get her hopes up, only for them to be deflated. “You got any plans Tomorrow night?”

“Just snuggling with my dog and drinking wine while singing karaoke” she mentally facepalmed herself at her honesty. She just sealed the deal on being forever single. Owen fidgeted and the air between them became awkward, no thanks to Jade’s awkward confession.

“Listen, I was wondering, and you can totally say no, if you wanted to maybe go to dinner with me? That’s if dinner is something you do, not like eat, because I’m sure you eat dinner, but if you don’t I’m not judging you. I mean like dinner dinner, y’know?” the boy looked frazzled and a little desperate to stop his verbal diarrhea from making him look even stupider than he did in that current moment.

“Like a date?” Jade hoped she wasn’t being too forward, but then again, a girl had to know. Owen gave her a sheepish smile and a nod yes, instantly filling her with excitement. “YES! Uhm... I mean sound great. I’d totally love- i mean like to go on a date with you” she blushed furiously, hoping she didn’t sound too desperate or too excited.

“Great! I’ll pick you up at 7?” she nodded and he smiled turning around and jogging back to set. Jade felt like she could fly or bench press a bus. She always tried to deny having feelings for him, but whenever she was asked she would stumble over her words and everyone instantly knew. Savannah and Tori often teased her about her feelings and pushed her to ask him out, but she was too nervous. Correction, she was too afraid to be rejected.

Jade never thought of herself as anything more than a plain and ordinary girl who happened to be able to dance well. She wasn’t overly pretty but she wasn’t hideous either, and there were very little standout qualities. Most people described her as quiet, mousy with a pretty smile, but nothing ever more than that. She believed she got it from her family as they too were described similarly. Her mother was a dentist and her father worked at a law firm. She was an only child and they have always lived a comfortable life, so naturally Jade never had any interesting stories to tell. She was just your average plain Jane.

The drive back to her apartment was full of joy and she blasted the music in her car as she drove, singing along to every tune. She was extremely excited to go on this date and her enthusiasm carried on as she bounced to her apartment door and inside. Placing her keys on the counter by the door, she went to her closet to pick out the best outfit. Looking at the array of clothing, she picked out a few and sent them to her co-stars/best friends for their opinions. Unfortunately, they both had different ideas as to what she should wear that night.

Sav: go for something cute and conservative! Southern boys like all American girls!

Tori: go for something a little sexy Cali girl. Like I’m a good girl but I’m also capable of being bad too

Sav: for the first date? Idk...

Tori: Sav, do you really think Owen is only about them all American girls? He was the one talking about how peaches were a brilliant emojis for butts

Sav: point taken.

Sav: go for something that best represents you!

Jade: a paper bag?

Tori: really?

Tori: you are more than just a paper bag J

Sav: we gotta go, Kenny’s calling places. I’m sure what you’ll pick will be fine! Send us a pic!

Jade frowned that her friends couldn’t chat longer to help her, but she knew she had to do this on her own. After filing through clothing, she finally found something she liked but noticed that she had spent an hour picking an outfit. Owen would be by in two hours, meaning that she had to speed up her process if she didn’t want to feel rushed!

She slipped stepping into the tub to take a shower, smashing her elbow on the towel bar. She quickly tried to rub the pain as she cursed under her breath. She had no time to be clumsy! She started her shower up and gracefully hopped in this time, hoping to avoid any further injury. After doing her daily hygiene routine, she applied the hair mask and wrapped it up in a shower cap, applying her face mask right after. She noticed that her legs felt the slightest bit fuzzy and cursed herself for not shaving in the shower. Quickly glazing at her phone for the time, she slathered on shaving cream and attempted to shave her leg using her bathroom counter, which was a mistake. She slipped, nicking her leg on the way down, bumping her head against the wall too.

“It’s fine, you’re fine, not a big deal Jade” she comforted herself. “Stick a Band-Aid on it and just wear jeans!”

She began to wash out the hair and facemask, making a mental note to patch herself up after. As she patted her face dry, she opened the medicine cabinet to grab a Band-Aid, when the lights shut off. Fumbling around for her phone, she quickly turned on the flashlight to find a Band-Aid and her bathrobe. Slipping on the robe, she made her way to the apartment breaker. Nothing had tripped on the breaker panel, but the power in her suite was completely shut off.

“That’s fine! You’ll just have to go with your natural curls instead of spicing things up with a straightener!” she could already feel the nauseous and claustrophobic feeling in her chest creep up on her, but she took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Now was not a good time for her to have an anxiety attack. She had an hour and fifteen minutes before Owen came. Plenty of time... right?

Making her way over to her closet, she began to look for another outfit that would look good with the jeans that she had picked out. She tried on top after top, but nothing seemed to fit right. Giving a huff in frustration, she sat on the bed to take a deep breath. She had to get going if she was going to have enough time to do her makeup, but it seemed like life had other plans. All of a sudden, the fire alarm in the complex went off, indicating that everyone was being asked to evacuate. She jumped at the noise and quickly threw on a sweater, grabbing her passport, wallet, documents and phone before exiting the building with the other residents.

It turned out to be a fire drill that was scheduled to happen last week, but Jade had completely forgotten about it. They all had to stand outside while the fire marshal cleared the building and checking the safety of it. By the time Jade had made her way back into the building and up to her suite, she had 30 minutes before Owen came over. She hated the outfit she was wearing, her hair was a mess due to the wind outside and she had no makeup on!

The feeling in her chest increased gradually as she rushed around the house, doing her best to multitask. The power came back on when she entered the suite, so she tried straightening her hair as the curls were a mess, but she underestimated her multitasking skills. She burnt herself multiple times as she tried to do her makeup and hair at the same time. It didn’t help that the bottom half of her hair was straight and the bottom half wasn’t, and her eyeliner was uneven. Looking at herself in the mirror stressed her out even more, so she washed her face and decided to restart. The alarm on her phone notified her that Owen would be at the door in 5 minutes, and that’s when everything bubbled over. Looking at her messy face, half done hair, wet shirt and jeans, she sniffled until the tears welled over. She sank to the bathroom floor feeling like an idiot. No normal person would be this upset over their appearance, so why was she? Would Owen think she was weird because of this? Would he even want to go out with her? Her breathing increased and she started to feel her ensuite close in on her, signaling a full blown anxiety attack.

Jade wasn’t comfortable talking about her anxiety. Her parents often made her feel like she was overreacting or seeking attention whenever they happened, but they never understood that if Jade had the choice, these things wouldn’t get to her. This feeling that you need to escape, but you don’t have the energy so you’re just a buzzing ball sitting in a deep dark hole. She would often cry during her attacks, ashamed that she lost control and ashamed that she got to this place. Her friends would tell her to seek professional help for it, but she waved them off knowing that if she did see someone, it would make things worse between her and her parents. She loved them a lot and often sought for their approval, and doing this would work against the hard work she put in to make them proud.

“Jade?...unlocked...hope that’s okay?... helloo?....dead?.... Jade?”

“Jade? Hey... Hey you’re okay...”

“Jade? It’s Owen.”

“Squeeze my hand if you hear me”

“Okay good. I want you to breathe with me”

“You’re doing great”

“That’s it”

“Breathe in for five, out for five”

“In five”

“Out five”

The murkiness of the voice became clearer and clearer as she regained control of her breathing. She began to feel a warmth enveloping her and holding her firmly. She wasn’t in the bathroom anymore but rather on the sofa in her living room with the balcony door open, letting in a cool breeze.

“Jade?” She focused her attention on the blonde boy who sat beside her, his arm currently wrapped around her and the other holding her hand. “Hey” his smile was warm and understanding, but Jade couldn’t help the tears that came to her eyes. Seeing this, Owen knew immediately what was happening. Before the apology left her lips, Owen had already began to speak.

“You have nothing to apologize for... Is this the first time?” She bowed her head sadly, wiping away the tears and shaking her head no. In this moment, she felt like a little kid getting into trouble, bracing herself for the disappointment she caused.

“Listen, I know how you feel. Your anxiety? Your panic? I feel it every day. You don’t have to be ashamed in front of me. Hell, you shouldn’t have to feel ashamed in front of anyone. Everyone goes through this right? Well obviously, in their own ways and not like you and me, but I think you get the point” his rant elicited a small chuckle from the girl. “Want to talk about it?”

Jade nodded her head, feeling comfortable around him. She recounted her struggles since getting home to the razor to the power to the fire drill up until their current moment. Owen was silent and attentive the entire time, hanging on to every word that came from her mouth.

“I mean, I’m flattered that you put in all this work to go on a date with me, but seriously, and I’m not saying this to like get on your good side or anything, but you don’t need all the makeup and stuff. You’re pretty pretty on your own” she smiled at his comment, grateful for the compliment as it made her feel better.

“Thanks, I’m sorry I ruined our date” he scoffed and shook his head, moving to the kitchen counter picking up the flowers he had brought for her.

“I was going to give these to you at the door, but seeing as the plans have changed, you should probably take them and put them in some water?” she blushed at the gesture and took them gratefully from him. As she puttered around the kitchen for some sort of vase, he tapped away on his phone. “Do you like pizza?”

“Owen, I LOVE pizza” he grinned back at her and tapped a couple more times on his phone. “What are you doing?”

“Bringing date night to us.” he replied simply, locking his screen and plopping down on the couch, clicking through the apps on the TV. “Alright, so you’re gonna show me your favorite musical and I will show you mine”

Jade thought that in order to make a good impression on a first date, you had to look perfect. Owen that night helped her see that when two people like each other, Pizza and Musicals are all you need on a first date.

#owen joyner #imagine #fanfiction #owen joyner fanfiction #owen patrick joyner #owen patrick joyner fanfic

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come-on-shitty-boys · 3 years

Text

// green hearts. kuroo tetsurou //

Warnings: kuroo’s like . . . hella mean?

Word Count: 1.45K

Notes: inspired by this fake fic by shitty. also i finished assassination classroom last night and LISTEN I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT THAT DIDN’T STOP ME FROM SOBBING wow my heart hurts

Usually the chime of your phone was easily ignored, but even he couldn’t help but get the tiniest bit frustrated when that small ding stole your attention away every few minutes, a cute smile on your face as you raised your phone up to snap a quick selfie. And it would’ve been fine. Kuroo had always stood idly by as you flirted and talked with other guys, being your shoulder to cry on whenever your heart was inevitably shattered into a hundred pieces. He was there to help you type out responses and laugh at the boys who thought “Hey” was a good enough opening line to get your attention. Kuroo was that friend. The best friend who was always down to listen to your girl problems, who had a steady stock of tampons and Midol in his club room locker just in case, your meme supplier and the one person that you would have trusted with your entire being. Yes, Kuroo was your best friend and that’s all he could ever want to be.

Well, that’s what he always told himself anyway.

But, it was your phone alerting you of yet another Snapchat that finally drew his eyes down to your screen. You snatched it up so quickly, clutching it to your chest as if you were doing something that you shouldn’t be. If that wasn’t enough to raise his suspicions, the way your eyes kept darting towards him every few seconds while you tapped out a response, each glance only making you seem to shy further away from him.

“Who’s in your DMs this time?” The remark was teasing enough, a simple question that he’s asked dozens of times, but this time your response was different. Your normal giggle as you would sidle over to him so you could show off an Instagram profile was only replaced by a shake of your head and nervous laugh as you rubbed the nape of your neck.

“It’s no one.”

“I’m pretty sure someone is blowing up your phone. Come on, show me! How am I supposed to scare him o- I mean- help you talk to him, if you don’t at least give me a name?”

Kuroo scooted closer to you, but you only slid away from him, the grip on your phone tightening even as it alerted you of an incoming message. “Kuroo, really. It’s just some guy.”

“Well, yeah. But, you at least have to tell me who.” His hand reached out to gently pull your phone screen towards him.

He wishes he hadn’t.

Snapchat from Daishou Suguru 💚

Kuroo’s normal teasing smirk fell before he even had the chance to catch himself. A hardened stone settled in his stomach and no matter how hard he tried, there was no overlooking it. He wanted to smile, pretend to be happy for you, put on his usual smile and laugh and tease you about your new beau until the day would come when it would all come crashing down around you. But, he couldn’t even bring himself to say a word, let alone push a fake smile.

Really? Of all people, you chose him? Had Kuroo really taught you nothing about that sneaky bastard? He was a manipulative, lying snake who was just going to throw you to the side when he got bored. He didn’t care about you. Not like-

Kuroo couldn’t keep that scoff away. His entire being felt heavy, head pounding at a rhythm steady with his heart. He was sure that if he dared to open his mouth, he wouldn’t have anything good to say to you. Kuroo felt his fists clench, nails digging into the palms of his hands as his jaw squared.

“You’re mad,” you state.

Of course he was mad. He was angry and frustrated and- and, well, he didn’t really know. He did know that he couldn’t stand the thought of Daishou Suguru being anywhere near you. That snake holding your hand, smiling at you, kissing you? Kuroo could have thrown up his lunch right there at the mental image of you and the one person that he hated most swapping spit. What was even so great about him? Daishou wasn’t anything exceptional. He wasn’t that tall. He didn’t have an impressive physique. He was smart, but there were definitely better options. Kuroo just couldn’t wrap his head around what the hell you were seeing in someone like him.

“I really like him, Kuroo. I know that you two have beef, but come on. He’s really a good guy. He’s one of the sweetest guys that I’ve ever talked to. You’re my best friend. Please, just let me try to be happy, even if it is with Daishou.”

He had never felt more hurt. Hearing you utter that he was your best friend felt like someone had just taken a knife and sank it hilt deep into his chest, leaving him to bleed out on the floor. That’s all he was to you. That’s all he ever would be to you. Kuroo Tetsurou was simply your best friend and that’s all he would ever be. But, as time continued to tick on by, he found himself hating that idea more and more. He didn’t want to be your best friend. He was already the one that you ran to when you were upset, but he wasn’t the one who would sit you in his lap and kiss the top of your head to tell you that everything would be okay. He wasn’t the one who got to send you sweet good morning and good night texts with heart emojis and cute pet names.

“He’s just using you, you know that right? The second Mika says she wants him back, he’s going to forget about you,” Kuroo says, leaning his head back so he didn’t have to see the way you physically flinched at his words or the way that your whole body trembled as you shrank further into yourself, becoming smaller than a meer field mouse. He leaned his head back so he didn’t have to see your heart shatter into a thousand different pieces from his words.

“Y-you don’t know that.”

He rolled his eyes, a bored expression painted across those features that you knew so well. “He doesn’t want you. He wants a distraction.”

“Kuroo-”

“Daishou doesn’t give a shit about you, but if you don’t want to listen to me, that’s fine. Just don’t expect me to be there when he hurts you.”

Your phone buzzed again. Another Snapchat from Daishou to tell you to have a good rest of your school day, that he would talk to you when he was done with practice, that maybe you guys could call tonight if you were free, to remind you that he really did like you, signed with a simple green heart emoji. But all of that didn’t matter to Kuroo. He didn’t care what the Nohebi captain said to you, it didn’t change that undeniable overwhelming sense of envy that completely and utterly consumed him.

The bleachers creaked as you stood and the weight shifted, each step only bringing another groan from the wooden seats. Kuroo finally looked at you, a completely defeated shell of who you used to be. There was no smile that would push a matching one to his own lips. You weren’t laughing and leaning into his side. No, you were walking away from him without another word, your phone clutched to your chest, eyes focused on the ground because you were sure that if you looked anywhere else, everything would come pouring out.

Kuroo Tetsurou was your best friend, but he had wanted to become something more for a while now. Watching you walk away from him without so much as a goodbye? He was sure that he had ruined any relationship that he had ever had with you and any chances of pursuing something further. He was so busy trying to convince you that Daishou Suguru would be your ultimate heartbreaker that he didn’t even realize that he was causing you some of the greatest pain that you had ever felt all because he was in love with you and his bitter rival just had the balls to tell you how he felt first.

The green heart was the ugliest emoji that Kuroo had ever laid eyes on, but there was nothing else that better described him. A heart filled with twisted green flames of envy, a horrible sight really.

#haikyuu!!#haikyuu #Kuroo #Kuroo Tetsurou #tetsurou #kuroo x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines

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lesberrian · 3 years

Text

take the shot

Chapter 1: lets kill this monster

Resting his chin on his hands, the principal sighs. “Listen, you two are my most brilliant international students here. Kiki Arata and Mio Rivera I’m willing to make an offer with the two of you just this once. Either you get expelled or sent to the E class.”

Kiki smiles on the inside, not letting her poker face break. “Doesn’t sound like much of a deal to me. I mean if I go to E class no school wants me and if I get expelled no school would want me.”

“I gotta agree with her sir, sounds like a lose-lose for us.” Mio yawns before rubbing the spot she punched him. ‘Not normally on the receiving end of her hits. Can’t say I’m excited for later either.’

The smile on his face is something Kiki would describe as ‘the evilest look I’ve ever seen and I’ve seen some evil looks’. He pulls out a file and places it before them. It seems to have some octopus-like creature that weirdly resembles an emoji as well inside it. “This is why you started the fight, yes? So you had reason to be sent to E class and kill this thing off is it not?”

‘Shit… he’s fucking with us. He has to be! Goddamnit! He wasn’t supposed to know.’ Keeping her cool on the outside only Mio can tell just how mad she is.

“Welp, caught us red-handed, sir. Suppose you know the old reason we were here too?” Mio laughs, trying to play it cool when he’s just as upset. ‘Was he told? He couldn’t have figured it out. No that’s impossible he’s too closed-minded.’

The man glares at the two students in front of his desk. “I do. And if this were any other circumstance I would be much more upset. But I’m willing to drop this all and send you to E class.”

Crossing her arms and huffing, kiki rolls her eyes. “Yeah yeah, whatever. We know everything already can we switch classes next week or what?”

Gakuho’s eye twitches in anger. “Don’t forget I’m still in charge here. I could call this whole thing off if I wanted.”

Standing up she grabs Mio by the jacket and forces him up too. “We know you won’t though. See ya’.”

“You’re going to keep this class until the deadline.” Mio stares down at the principal. “Otherwise I’ll make sure the chemistry lab’s chemicals make their way into the city’s water supply.”

Kiki walks out of the office, slamming the door behind her. “Honestly boys can be so annoying.”

The two men in the office continue to stare at each other until Mio turns around. “Whatever. Don’t think I’m joking though.”

The door closes normally unlike when Kiki left. Gakuho closes his eyes for a moment to regain his composure. He wasn’t scared of them, they’re just children after all. As long as they are at his school he is the one at the top no matter what they think. No, he’s more annoyed and unsettled by the odd students.

Mio notices that Kiki was already gone from the hallway. Not bothering to catch up with her he turns the corner only to fall down.

“What the..?” Moving his hand to his nose he looks up. He got punched. She had punched him in the face. “The hell was that for, huh?”

Kiki shrugs, “Dunno. At least you’ll have a reason to hit me Monday.” Pulling him up by the sleeve for what he swears is the 20th time today, she heads off to go home leaving him behind. “I call not it on cooking!”

“Whatever just order takeout or something!” He catches up to her quickly, thanking God she wasn’t running. “Governments money we’re on anyways. Not like it comes out of our paycheck.”

Kiki smirks, “Even if it did, the 10 billion would definitely cover it.” She flips her hair behind her shoulder. “Once this is over I’m going to have a field day at the mall.”

Mio deadpans. “Don’t tell me you’re going to spend it all so quickly…”

“Don’t tell me you’re going to spend it all so quickly” She mocks in a high-pitched voice. “Man, knowing what we do there’s a good chance I’ll end up dead soon. I can’t feel pain so I could bleed out and not even know. Not like you could understand.”

Kiki was annoyed. She always got upset over the smallest things. Everyone always wishes they can’t feel pain no matter what she said. All the scars on her body because of her condition should be proof enough that life without pain is hell.

“Right, sorry.” Mio looks away from her, focusing on the ground. Kiki looks at him in annoyed confusion. “Guess if I was in your situation I would focus on right now too.”

She clicks her tongue. “Yeah, I guess you would.”

Walking off campus she keeps an eye on him, wondering what’s up with him. Before about two months ago, he would’ve fought back with her. They got along fine but because of her moods, arguments broke out pretty often. ‘Is he just giving up on the arguments? Decided there’s no point since it always ends the same way? Ugh, he’s so annoying’

Pulling out her phone she orders something to be delivered. “Hey, what do you want for-” She notices there’s a huge cut on her arm. “Oh. Good thing I have an extra shirt.”

Mio glances over. “When did that happen?” Looking behind them, he notices a sharp piece of metal sticking out of the fence she was walking near. He points at it nonchalantly. “Maybe that?”

“Sure, makes sense.” She agrees before going back to the topic before. “Anyways as I was saying what do you want for dinner? I’m thinking sushi.”

“Sounds good, what about the one over near the theater?”

Kiki’s face scrunches up in disgust. “Absolutely not. That place smelled so bad I think I felt pain.”

Mio starts laughing at her over-exaggeration. “Yeah, I think a skunk ran that store. But seriously this time the one on that corner street a bit from the house is good.”

“One by the house…” she mutters, trying to think of what he’s talking about. “Oh yeahhhh, that one. Yeah, let’s go there.”

Before they turn the opposite way of their house to go to the restaurant, Kiki stops and heads to the house. “Probably should bandage this up and change. Plus it’s still early.” Smiling a bit she laughs at the first time she didn’t notice she was bleeding and walked into the store. “You know, no matter how old I get, other people’s reaction never changes.”

After wrapping her arm, she heads over to Mio’s room. Knocking on the door she waits until he answers. Hearing a ‘come in’ she opens the door and leans against the frame. “You have the anti-octopus stuff?”

“Yeah, come here I’ll show you some of the things we get to use.” Standing up, he goes to the box they were sent and places it on the bed, grabbing what he made as well he starts prepping it. “We ready to kill this octopus monstrosity or what?”

“Hell yeah, that ten billion is ours.” Looking at what’s in his hand she fake gags. “Now hurry up and get this over with.”

“Yes, your majesty.” He bows with a goofy smile before doing what she asked. “Alright, let me grab my wallet and we can go.”

Arriving at the restaurant, Kiki notices someone from school. Nudging Mio she nods her head towards him. “That’s Nagisa. Goes to our school.”

“And we should care why? We’re in E class now, doubt he’ll talk to us.” Mio shugs.

Rolling her eyes, Kiki brings him over to Nagisa’s Table.

“Nagisa. Tell me how to kill your teacher.” She sits down in front of him. Mio stays standing. He’s caught on to the fact that Nagisa is in E class and decided to play along with whatever Kiki is doing.

Nagisa stammers, obviously flustered by this question. “I- I’m sorry- Uh- Did you just ask how to-”

“We’re in E class as of now and wanna know how to kill that thing.” Mio stares down at him. Kiki almosts laugh at him being so serious as he came crying to her about not knowing how to bleach his hair before the school year started. “And since us two have a better chance of killing that teacher than any of you combined, if you help us we might give you some of the money.”

There’s a silence between the three of them and Kiki sighs. “Listen, if you don’t know how to kill it then tell us some ways you’ve tried. Knock it off the list for us.”

Nagisa hesitates before bringing out his notebook with Koro-Sensei’s weaknesses. “These are his weaknesses I’ve gathered so far. Go ahead and look. Also, we call him Koro-sensei.” Handing the notebook to the girl in front she tosses it to Mio and stares at Nagisa, waiting to go on. “So far, Karma’s the only one who’s been able to land a hit on him. Cut up the knife and taped it to his hands. When he shook his hand, he got a tentacle. Don’t try a suicide method either. He tried to fall off a cliff so he would be forced to die saving him or let a student die. Koro-sensei just made a net underneath him..”

Mio smirks. “Smart kid. Did anything else work?”

Nagisa shakes his head. “No, I tried a grenade on myself-”

“Damn, Nagisa.” Kiki laughs. “Did not expect that from you, I like that.”

“Well, looking at you right now must mean it failed,” Mio says, making Kiki move so he can sit down.

Before they could continue, a waitress comes over. “Hello, is there anything I can get you?”

‘Oh yeah, we came here for food.’ Kiki realizes. The three of them order what they want and when she leaves the two assassins continue to integrate the poor boy. For the rest of the time they spent at the restaurant, the main conversation was about Koro-sensei. When the waitress came back with the check, Mio and kiki covered Nagisa’a bill.

“Payment for your information. Plus this is the government’s money we’re on.” Kiki says, taking the last sip of her drink before standing up. “See you on Monday, Nagisa.”

Leaving the boy in the restaurant, he questions everything that just happened while heading home. ‘E class sure is special…”

Over the weekend, Mio made sure they had everything they needed to kill Koro-sensei while Kiki did research on everyone in the class, even going and finding some of them in public to talk and see how they behave. Waking up early on Monday, they make their way up the mountain to the old building. Arriving slightly late so they were sure everyone was there, they see Koro-sensei through the window.

“You do have the first aid kit right?” Kiki asks. Mio nods and she smiles. “Good.”

Punching him straight in the jaw with her right fist before turning to the side and using her left foot to kick him in the side.

Getting up he mutters, “Little less hard, this is fake, remember?” Before tackling her to the ground, she slips out of his grip easily and runs to the classroom, pulling off her sweater. Mio grabs it before it’s fully off her head and slams her into the glass. Pulling her back her fully slams her into it, successfully breaking it and tossing her into the classroom. The class sits there in horror while Koro-sensei doesn’t move to do anything yet. Standing up with no issue, Kiki grabs Mio, making sure he doesn’t land in the glass.

“Get out of my way and let me kill him, Arata.” Mio spits some blood out and glares up at her. He grabs the knife dedicated for Koro-sensei and goes to stab him. Kiki pushes him out of the way and he pulls out the real knife and slashes her right side while going for the teacher.

Koro-sensei finally pulls him away and Kiki fakes collapses, pretending to be in pain. Slowly getting up she staggers over to him and he goes to touch her face to see how bad the bleeding is. Right when he does his tentacle explodes off of him. Both assassins take his moment of shock to attack. Mio cuts the tentacles holding him and aims for the head while Kiki launches her entire body onto him. Getting some tentacles destroyed, he realizes what’s happening and quickly moves using his speed. Neither hesitates to continue aiming for him. Mio with his gun and knife and kiki using herself and a knife.

“This is all your fault this failed you useless waste of space!” Kiki turns her attention to Mio, going to attack him instead. He blocks her attacks and goes to stab her with his real knife again and she decides to back out of the class. While Koro-sensei is taking time to recover from what just happened, the two new students left. Nagisa and Karma run to find them. Karma was impressed by the two and Nagisa was concerned for them both. Other classmates followed and so does Koro-sensei. Getting to the two, Kiki is backed onto the branch Karma jumped off of.

Karma’s eyes widen in excitement “Jeez, Nagisa! You really know these people?!”

“For fucks sake I can’t believe they thought that you of all people would be able to kill him! You can’t even kill me!” Mio laughs in anger, before walking on the branch to her. Kiki takes a step back and the branch snaps, causing her to fall.

Both teens automatically forget their act and Kiki screams in fear. Mio, in a moment of panic, jumps after her. Grabbing onto her and pulling her close to him they both close their eyes tightly.

“Guess I’m not getting that shopping trip…” Kiki tries to joke before they both hit the mountain ground and die.

Mio pulls her as close and he can, flipping himself to have his back against the ground. “I’m sorry… I lo-”

Both of them are wrapped in a large white sheet and brought back up being set down onto the ground, neither of them moves from their position. Mio sighs shakily and what happens finally catches up to both of them

“Holy shit...” Kiki mumbles quietly.

Mio grabs onto her in a panic. “Are you ok?! Jesus christ I almost killed you!” Picking her up he runs back to where they dropped their bags. He grabs them both and brings them into an empty room with no windows. Setting her down gently on a desk he grabs all the first aid, rushing back to her.

Before he can do anything, Kiki puts her hands on his shoulders, looking up at him from the desk. Before you try to play doctor I’m going to need you to take a breath. I don’t know what got into you but I’m okay. We didn’t kill him but we still have time. Don’t rush to fix me so we can try again.”

Mio closes his eyes and takes a breath, trying to calm his nerves. “Right, I was just…” Looking at her he realizes she’s going to need to take off her shirt for him to get all the glass out. “Uh, you’re gonna have to take your shirt off.”

“I cannot allow that to happen I’m afraid.” Koro-sensei appears next to them. “Sexual acts are not allowed on campus.”

Both of them turn red, Kiki yelling at the teacher. “HE DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT HE JUST HAS TO GET THE GLASS OUT OF MY BACK AND BANDAGE ME UP YOU UGLY, PERVY, NASTY OCTOPUS!”

Thankfully for them, Another teacher comes to help them out. Karasuma is there to get the octopus to leave them alone. Once he’s gone, Karasuma clears his throat. “I’m sorry about him. I would like to congratulate you on your attempt to kill him. You two have gotten farther than anyone else here has.”

“Yeah… we know.” Mio is still embarrassed by what Koro-sensei said. “Kinda our job to kill him.”

Kiki hides her embarrassment and goes back to her normal, uncaring tone. “Now, could you leave so we can finish this? Just cause I can’t feel it doesn’t mean I’m not bleeding.”

“I’ll leave now.” Shutting the door, he leaves the two teens sitting in silence not looking at the other.

“Well, he should hurry up, I’m sure the class has questions…” Kiki unbuttons her shirt and pulls it off so he can get to what he needs.

“...right. Uh let me grab the stuff, hold on.” While tending to her wounds, he tries to focus on only the glass and cuts, not wanting to make it any more awkward. ‘Damn octopus, if it wasn’t for him it wouldn’t be so awkward right now. I’ve done this plenty of times before. Why did he have to make her uncomfy?’ After 30 minutes she was completely bandaged up and put her other uniform on. “Have you seen my sweater?” Looking behind her as she fixes the last button she sees it in front of where’s he’s sitting. ‘Is he even listening?’

Reaching over him to grab it she quickly puts it on. Seeing he has earbuds in she purses her lips. ‘He’s so weird sometimes. He was all panicky and now he’s not even listening to me.’ Poking him he takes out his earbuds. “Come on, dummy. Gotta go to class now.”

“We should skip.” He looks at her. “I don’t know if I should even let you be walking. Some of the glass went deep into your leg and too much movement will mess with the bandaids.”

“Stop being such a mom. Besides, that’s less of a chance of killing him.” Grabbing her bag she opens the door, staring at him expectantly. “Besides, you were the one who was in a rush to fix me up for a second chance.”

“That’s…” He trails off ‘not the reason I was so scared.’ deciding not to say that he shakes his head “That’s fair I suppose.”

“Good,” Her eyes darken, “Now, let’s kill our teacher.”

#assassination classroom #assclass #assassination classroom nagisa #assassination classroom fanfic #assassionation classroom oc #first chapter and they almost die lol #kiki has CIP and cant feel pain so i hope that helps #honestly i wish i could write some of my fave scences and the ending but noOoooOO i gotta do this first #anyways that was my TED talk

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laurelnose · 4 years

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ngl, at first i read the title of one of your WIPs as "lambert X rotfiends" instead of +, and i had a moment that can only be described as "!?!??!?!", but in bold and italics, lmao. anyway, i am!!! most intrigued by vivisection. *heart emoji*

lmfao oh my god yeah rotfiends are... a bit beyond even my monsterfucking intrepidness! it’s funny though because that fic is actually about rotfiend sex, just like, they are definitely having sex with other rotfiends and not with lambert! i have a real specific headcanon about rotfiends reproducing like a certain type of marine worm, i.e. by exploding (warning: gross) and Lambert is often the most fun to inflict my biology nonsense upon. he just gets so het up when the world serves him some absolute bullshit like “an entire lake is going to be poisoned by a rotfiend orgy and this ealdorman wants to make it your problem,” it’s delightful

re: vivisection: sldkfjdfd YEAH OKAY congratulations on finding the most self-indulgent idfic on the list!! cut for gore reasons

it is exactly what it says on the tin! this fic consists of the flimsiest possible excuse to pin eskel to a table and make him cry. there is shockingly little gore in this fandom and you know what, sometimes you just want to be elbow-deep in your fave’s chest cavity, you feel me?

It wasn’t as if Eskel didn’t know there were pain receptors inside vital organs. He’d learned Kaer Morhen’s physiologia texts back to front, fascinated by the inner workings of the body, monstrous and human. It wasn’t even the first time he’d confirmed his readings with first-hand observation. There came a point in the career of most witchers where you either learned how to stitch your own intestines back in place or you prepared to attract necrophages, and Eskel wasn’t carrion yet.

Despite all that, shockingly enough, having someone else’s hand jammed in there made the whole experience very novel.

it’s a mage. probably. they have reasons for doing this. probably. eskel is fine in the end. definitely. haven’t quite figured out how he escapes post-vivisection but it’s okay i’ll get him out of there eventually

#gore cw #also you didn't really ask about [lambert + rotfiends] but I LOVE ROTFIENDS SO IM SAYIN THINGS ANYWAYS #wip titles meme #laurelnose fic #asks #Anonymous

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kurowrites · 4 years

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The Sweetest Admission (Part I)

Ok, have 3k of Wangxian University AU, only they’re both girls, live in the same dorm, and Wei Ying might or might not have a crush.

Also, this is very definitely NSFW.

---

Wei Ying knew that she wasn’t exactly what people would describe as the ideal of femininity, but it had never really bothered her before. Sure, she had long black hair that she was rather proud of, and she liked wearing nice skirts and heels from time to time, but in general, she couldn’t really give a damn about what she looked like, or if anyone found her attractive at all. At a time when her female classmates discovered dating and boyfriends, she discovered that she definitely had no interest in that, thankyouverymuch. Flirting was fun, but she didn’t care about the part that came after.

It was fine, she thought. She had her family that she loved, and she had received a full scholarship for the university she had been wanting to go to. She had good friends and would make new friends at university. Who had time for anything else when your life was already so busy? She didn’t care that she had never been confessed to, or that her stepmother sometimes criticized her for not caring about her appearance enough. She had places to go and things to do, and she could do all of that in a t-shirt.

Her thinking changed shortly after she had moved into the on-campus dorm of her university. There were many other girls like her, with similar stances on fashion and dating, but one fateful day, she met an elusive unicorn that happened to live on the same floor as her. Lan Zan was her undoing.

Wei Ying wasn’t joking when she said that she had never met such a beautiful woman in her life. She had long, glossy, perfectly straight hair that nearly reached her buttocks when she wore it open. She had a regal countenance that would a marble statue cry in envy. She had long, slender limbs that moved with incredible poise and elegance. She was always dressed in shades of white and ice blue, the cut of the clothes never revealing, never tight, but suiting her figure so well, that in all honesty, she looked hotter fully dressed than had she strutted around the dorm half-naked.

Wei Ying was insanely jealous on first sight. This was a level of beauty and perfection that she couldn’t possibly hope to achieve, and while a comparison with other girls had never pained her before, it pained her now. God, she was so jealous of Lan Zhan. Lan Zhan was too beautiful for her heart.

It didn’t help that Wei Ying realized quite early in her acquaintance that while Lan Zhan might seem rather cool and distant at first glance, she was actually a very nice person that would go out of her way to help her dormmates. She was strict about the rules, which put her and Wei Ying on opposing sides more than once, but she was interesting. She was incredibly interesting and fun once Wei Ying got to know her, and sometimes had an amazing sense of humour, when Wei Ying managed to tickle her just in the right spot. She was also a talented musician and an excellent student. Wei Ying had thought perfection didn’t exist, but here she lived, three doors down from her.

It was easy, almost irresistible, to keep badgering Lan Zhan into spending time with Wei Ying, since they both lived on the same floor of the same dorm. Wei Ying could hardly ever convince her to come to a party or some other “fun” kind of event, but Lan Zhan would always let Wei Ying into her room if she wanted to study together (even when they were studying different subjects). She would go to art exhibits or concerts with Wei YIng, provided that the concerts weren’t too loud and rowdy. They would go on walks together, and eat in the dining hall together. Whenever Wei Ying came to Lan Zhan’s room, she had some delicious snacks ready to share with Wei Ying.

Lan Zhan was, all in all, an excellent friend.

Wei Ying wanted to do that newly gained friend justice. When she first came to uni, she was fine with existing mostly in black jeans and some kind of shirt, because honestly, who had time for more than that. But the more time she spent with Lan Zhan, the more she started to become conscious of her own appearance. She couldn’t walk around like a rat that crawled out of a sewage tunnel when Lan Zhan was next to her! He couldn’t hope to be on Lan Zhan’s level, ever, but she felt that she had to put a little more effort into her appearance.

So, she dug deeper into her wardrobe and pulled out all the cute clothes that she hadn’t worn for a while, the little gifts she had gotten from her sister Yanli she had never fully appreciated before. She wore short skirts with overknee socks that showed off the nice shape of her legs. She wore loose crop tops together with those high-waisted jeans that looked proper when she sat down but showed off just a little bit of her midriff when she moved around. She wore shorts paired with patterned stockings, and that very cute black fifties-style dress with the red heart-shaped buttons in the front that Yanli had gifted her last year.

Lan Zhan never commented on her looks, but sometimes Wei Ying was almost sure she caught Lan Zhan looking. She kind of liked that, getting Lan Zhan’s attention. Wei Ying could hardly ever take her eyes off Lan Zhan, beautiful and elegant as she was. To catch the attention of such a woman, it was flattering.

It was a Sunday, and Wei Ying and Lan Zhan had originally planned to take a nice walk in the nearby botanical garden, a small break from studying all week. But when morning came, instead of the expected sunshine, heavy rain had greeted Wei Ying when she looked out of her window. They would have to give up on the botanical garden.

When Wei Ying sent Lan Zhan a message that said as much (with a row of sad emojis), Lan Zhan sent her an immediate reply.

If you want to, you can come to my room. We can watch that movie you’ve been wanting to see.

Truly, Lan Zhan was the best! She always knew how to make Wei Ying happy.

Ecstatic, she danced over to her wardrobe and picked out her nicest overknee socks, a short, red pleated skirt with a high waist, and a black crop top that complimented the look. She checked herself in the mirror and declared the look very nice, before she tied her hair in her usual high ponytail and rushed off down the hallway to Lan Zhan’s door.

The door opened almost immediately when she knocked, and she darted into the room, throwing herself onto Lan Zhan’s bed with out hesitation, face first.

“Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, let’s watch!” she giggled into Lan Zhan’s pillow.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan said, and it was her warning tone.

Wei Ying looked up at Lan Zhan, trying to figure out what had made her use that particular tone. Lan Zhan had already moved close, reaching out to fix Wei Ying’s skirt that had slipped up and nearly exposed her underwear.

Wei Ying laughed. “Lan Zhan, always so proper! It’s fine, we’re in your room, it’s only you here! I don’t mind you seeing my underwear!”

Lan Zhan’s ears turned red at that, and Wei Ying laughed again. Lan Zhan was always perfectly put together, so it must bother her to see Wei Ying being her opposite in all aspects. But ever since he had been wearing more skirts again, she had also bought new underwear, cute slips and frilly bralettes that she didn’t mind Lan Zhan seeing. She might want Lan Zhan to see them. She might be a little bit of an exhibitionist, but after she had spent so much money that she didn’t really have on unnecessary things…

“Don’t worry,” she said, turning around until she was facing Lan Zhan looking down at her. “I wouldn’t do that with anyone else. But Lan Zhan is Lan Zhan, so it’s fine.”

Lan Zhan sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed, an impossibly elegant movement that made Wei Ying want to reach out and touch her, to assure herself that she was really real. She still didn’t know how she had managed to convince Lan Zhan to be her friend.

“Perhaps you should be worried,” Lan Zhan said in a quiet voice.

Wei Ying tilted her head in confusion.

“What? Why?”

Lan Zhan’s eyelashes fluttered for a moment before she closed her eyes. “Because I have always liked girls.”

The room seemed suddenly devoid of oxygen. Lan Zhan liked girls? Girls? Perfect, competent, controlled Lan Zhan had an interest in someone?

“Oh.”

Lan Zhan was quiet and still.

“Lan Zhan… am I a bother?”

With an expression of confusion on her face, Lan Zhan turned around to look at Wei Ying.

“I mean… I’m always hanging around you,” Wei Ying stuttered, her heart pounding painfully in her chest. She clutched the sheets underneath her hands. “And uh… if you want a girlfriend, then I must be… an annoyance, because, uh…”

“I understand, Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan said, her voice distant as she turned away and got up from the bed.

“What do you understand?” Wei Ying asked, sitting up. She felt upset, but she wasn’t quite sure what was happening right now. Lan Zhan liked girls. Lan Zhan might want a girlfriend. Lan Zhan might not want to spend time with Wei Ying anymore. It hurt. “If you don’t want to hang out with me because you’re interested in someone else, then just tell me that! I don’t know what you’re thinking if you don’t tell me, and as long as you don’t reject me, I will always want to spend time with Lan Zhan!”

Lan Zhan turned back to Wei Ying, a minute frown on her face. “Interested in someone else?”

“Yes, why else are you telling me all this?” Wei Ying shouted. “I mean, it couldn’t be– it could never be me, the person that Lan Zhan likes!”

Oh god, she thought to herself, panicking. What am I saying? What am I doing? I’m destroying the best friendship I’ve ever had.

Suddenly, Lan Zhan was in her space, back on the edge of the bed. A hand found its way under her skirt, clever fingertips wandering up her thigh, and suddenly, there was Lan Zhan’s voice, murmuring in her ear.

“You don’t even know,” she said with a voice that went straight down Wei Ying’s spine, making her entire body erupt into electric tingles, “the things I want to do to you.”

There was a sudden heat between Wei Ying’s legs that was so overpowering, she might have gasped. She couldn’t be sure, however, since she felt like she had just lost all control over her bodily functions.

God, she felt so hot. And Lan Zhan was so close. And she was looking at her like that. And her hand was up Wei Ying’s skirt.

“Lan Zhan,” she whined in her distress.

She didn’t know what she wanted, but she wanted Lan Zhan closer. Closer. She swayed closer to her, pressing herself to Lan Zhan’s body, delighted when Lan Zhan’s hands moved to close around her waist, pull her onto Lan Zhan’s lap.

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan whispered. “It’s always been you.”

Long fingers found their way under her top, stroking her breasts and nipples over her bralette.

“Oh my god, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying groaned. She thought she might be going out of her mind. “Please, kiss me.”

Lan Zhan did exactly that. Her first kisses were hesitant, small pecks peppered over her nose and cheeks. Then her lips found Wei Ying’s, and soft, gentle presses quickly escalated into deep, drawn out kisses that left both of them gasping. At some point, Wei Ying couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment, Lan Zhan had laid her down onto the bed, pressing her into the soft, silky sheets, one hand still exploring her sensitive breasts.

With a sudden bout of clarity, she realized that she had spread her legs, almost rubbing herself on one of Lan Zhan’s thighs, begging to be touched. She blushed with an intensity she hadn’t thought possible, and tried to get her body to stop embarrassing her.

Lan Zhan’s hand removed itself from under her shirt as she gently bit Wei Ying’s swollen lips. Her hand wandered lower, dipping under her skirt, feathering over the inner side of her thigh, making Wei Ying gasp and spread her thighs further almost against her will. The fingers halted just at the seam of her underwear.

“Do you want me to?” Lan Zhan asked.

“Oh god,” Wei Ying gasped, unable to control herself as Lan Zhan’s finger brushed along the seam of her panties. “Oh god, Lan Zhan, oh, I– I want it so bad, Lan Zhan, please, please, please touch me.”

Lan Zhan hummed in a way that sounded like approval, but Wei Ying couldn’t concentrate on that right now because Lan Zhan was slowly peeling off her underwear, and oh god, she felt so wet down there, she might have never been so wet in her entire life.

Was that normal?

She was going out of her mind.

With her usual infinite care, Lan Zan pulled Wei Ying’s panties down her legs, removing them carefully, taking care not to damage them, leaving her overknee socks exactly where they were. Wei Ying couldn’t stop looking, because it was so, so hot. Lan Zhan might be the most erotic person she had ever seen.

Then, with Lan Zhan’s hands still on her feet, Wei Ying lay exposed in front of Lan Zhan, her rucked up skirt only providing a modicum of modesty. Lan Zhan’s fingers travelled up her legs again, stroking her calves, her thighs, and Wei Ying thought her heart would beat out of her chest at any moment. Every movement of Lan Zhan added to the tension. She was more nervous than she had ever been in her life, but she couldn’t move. She could only lie there and wait for Lan Zhan’s next action.

This time, the fingers didn’t stop as they had before. They travelled over her labia, stroking her exposed skin gently, and the feeling was already too much. They hadn’t even started yet, and it was too much.

“Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying sobbed in desperation.

Lan Zhan’s fingers found the way into her soft flesh, light and seeking at first, and then pressing down with more intent, making a few experimental, circling strokes. Wei Ying shook so hard, he nearly fell off the bed.

With the same small frown with which she usually attacked a complicated problem in her homework, Lan Zhan repositioned herself, moved Wei Ying’s legs until Wei Ying was completely exposed to Lan Zhan’s intent gaze, and then, holding one of her legs to keep her in that position, touched her again. The small rubbing motions were pure torture and agony. Lan Zhan moved up and down, varying her pace and position, checking for Wei Ying’s reactions.

Wei Ying didn’t care what Lan Zhan did; she was already gone. Every stroke of Lan Zhan’s fingers shook her to the core, had her gasp and moan and beg in the lewdest manner, her body jerking as if it was possessed. If she had been of sound mind, she would have been mortified. Luckily, Lan Zhan’s fingers made it impossible to form a single rational thought.

With a litany of “Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan, Lan Zhan” on her lips, she came so hard that she whited out for several moments, a strange sound ringing in her ears.

When he came back to herself, she was breathing heavily, gasping for air. Lan Zhan was looking down at her, something not unlike satisfaction in her gaze.

When rational though finally set in again, Wei Ying covered her face in embarrassment.

“I will never be able to look you in the eye again,” he mumbled from behind the shield of her hands.

“Wei Ying is beautiful.”

He felt soft lips press a kiss onto her knee.

“Perfect.”

Another one, on her thigh.

“Shouldn’t be ashamed.”

The inside of her thigh.

Wei Ying struggled for breath. Lan Zhan wasn’t going to– she wasn’t going to–

Lan Zhan’s lips brushed her pubic mound.

“Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying gasped in desperation. “Lan Zhan, I’m going to die.”

“Mmh,” Lan Zhan replied, and licked her clitoris.

Wei Ying had no idea what was happening to her anymore. She could only hope that the other girls on the floor had gone out today, because whatever was happening in this room right now, it wasn’t happening quietly.

Her flesh was already oversensitive, and she had never had anyone go down on her before in her life. She saw stars, was sure that she saw the beginning of the universe. Lan Zhan’s tongue diving into her innermost parts had her sob and beg like she hadn’t been able to believe just a minute ago. When she came the second time, much faster this time, she collapsed onto the bed like a puppet with its strings cut.

She wouldn’t be able to move if she wanted to. She couldn’t feel her extremities, and her muscles were jittery and weak.

“’m sorry,” she eventually croaked, trying to get some feeling in her fingers again. “I don’t think I can return the favour right now.”

“No need,” Lan Zhan replied, and kissed her brow. Then she conjured forth a wet towel from somewhere and cleaned Wei Ying up. She carefully slipped Wei Ying’s panties on her again and fixed her skirt, moving it down until it covered her upper thighs properly.

Wei Ying’s heart felt full to bursting. Lan Zhan was so good to her. She couldn’t believe that Lan Zhan was… fuck.

Lan Zhan had just utterly destroyed her. She would have to quit university, because she was pretty sure that all her sense had fled the building. She would be stupid for the rest of her life.

Lan Zhan made a movement as if trying to get up from the bed, but Wei Ying grabbed the sleeve of her shirt before she could pull away.

“Lan Zhan,” she begged. “Stay with me.”

There was a moment of silence, and Wei Ying feared she had made a grave mistake. But then, Lan Zhan laid down next to her, wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling Wei Ying to her chest. She was so soft, and so good, and so beautiful. Wei Ying thought she might die.

“Mh,” Lan Zhan agreed softly, and Wei Ying could see the faintest smile lifting the corners of her mouth. “I will.”

#kuro writes #the untamed #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #goodbye fellas #it was nice knowing you

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jumoonjae · 4 years

Text

I’LL NEVER LOVE AGAIN- THE STORM

PART 1 PART 2 PART 4 PART 5

Pairings: Ji Changmin (Q) X Reader X Jaehyun (Hyunjae) Ft Kevin Moon Genre: Fluff x Angst X SLIGHT SMUT Word count: 21,562 words

Summary: A talent show will take place in three week times and you still struggling with putting emotion in the song that you choose, a masterpiece by Lady Gaga, ‘I’ll never love again’. You meet Changmin who you fall for instantly after he jumps in to help you figuring out how to perform the song. Will he manage to help you? Or will he be the one who cause you to sing the song for him? Image are not mine. Credit to Google.

Changmin

He came late to his group gathering after sending her back to her dorm after another sleepover last night which he had a hard time saying goodbye with a long make out session in his car before he had to let her go and promised to meet her after her class end tomorrow evening.

“Changmin-ah.” Jaehyun call as soon as he get into the restaurant.

“Hyung.” He smiles and walk straight to him giving him a long manly hugs before greeting the other and Kevin who was oddly silent.

“How are you? Isn’t it your semester break too? If you told me you’re here during your break, I’m not going back and hang out with you instead.” Jaehyun pat his shoulder as he took the seat between Jaehyun and Kevin.

“Yeah it was. But I’m helping my girlfriend out with her performance next week, then I’ll be spending the rest of my break with Ghana afterwards.” He didn’t realize how Kevin’s eyes almost popped out from its socket after he heard the words girlfriend. He leaned forward to get Changmin’s attention asking for explanation but the guy just pushed him away playfully and there’s a glint of shyness plastered on his face.

“Girlfriend? Wow. I’m happy for you. Finally, its almost a year now am I right?” Jaehyun smiles at him and he nods. Its no that can’t move on from his ex or anything, its just tiring dealing with the heartbreak. He needs to start over in relationship again sooner or later and she just came into the picture. He was more than happy to claim her for himself.

“Yeah. We just made it official. I think you know her too because she’s Kevi..” He stop at his words when he saw the name of the girl he has spent the whole weekend with a heart emoji and a candid picture of her smiling so sweet holding a flower bouquet admiring it pops on Jaehyun’s phone waiting for Jaehyun to answer, his heart drop dangerously a thousand feet, free falling. The picture probably taken way back because her hair was black and she still look exceptionally beautiful that it hurts him so bad.

“Excuse me guys. Baby hey, why aren’t you answering my calls?” Everything around him seems like a picture that it has stop for a moment, he didn’t move or say anything it's like his body is shutting down, a shock is an understatement to describe how he feels, he was numbed that he couldn’t process what was happening, it was happening so fast that he think that maybe what happened during the weekend was only a dream. Or was it really? He felt a hand squeezing his shoulder and look to his right to find Kevin giving him an apologetic look and that was when he felt the pain, and then anger.

“Kevin. What is this?” His voice came out shaky but loud enough to make the other stop talking and all the attention was on him. He couldn’t believe that the girl he fell hard for which he spent his whole weekend with was the one who his hyung always brag about all the time. How he wish he could turn back time and.. he don’t even have a clue what to do if he turns back time. Falling for her was never an option, it was not something he can control. Maybe it was his fault for falling for her and he has no idea what to do or how to react. He was hurt. No. He felt betrayed and he had to control himself so he wont snap on anyone by balling up his fist tightly until his knuckles turns white.

“Its not what you think Changmin. You need to give her chance to explain. It’s a lot more complicated than what you think.” Kevin grab his shoulder gently try to calm him but he felt otherwise. He was furious but he want to heard it from Kevin if its not from her. Well at least he has a clue about the situation.

“Tell me then Kev. Tell me the truth.” He was about to lose his mind but he couldn’t snap at Kevin because it wasn’t his fault and he couldn’t blame her either because he needs to know from her side of story too.

“I can’t because I’m not in that place to tell you or him. She needs to tell you both herself. But I promise that all her feeling for you is genuine.” Kevin try to talk him out while the other has no clue what was going on. But his answer wasn’t enough, it drive him to the edge even more.

He rub his face harshly out of frustration while Kevin still try to calm him down but when he look out, he saw her outside walking towards Jaehyun. She look fresh with no make up on, nothing. Not even her signature red lips. She wears her black hoodie and matching back ripped jeans and he hates it because he still admires her for it and it kills him to think that she was more comfortable showing her raw side to Jaehyun than him. He prayed hard that it was all a lie. That she was just trying to pull a prank on him and hoping that she’ll walk into the restaurant and run to his embrace instead. But it wasn’t. Because she was walking into another man’s arm making his heart shattered into a million pieces. That was it. That’s the answer he’s been searching for and he wont need any explanation from anyone anymore. He couldn’t stand to look any longer before mustering all the strength he got left and stand abruptly wanting to leave.

“Changmin wait. Please let her explain.” Kevin grab his wrist but he pull away harshly. He was mad. Mad at her, at Kevin and at anyone who already knew about her and Jaehyun but just let him fall for her. Everyone is at fault.

“You and your best friend can just go to hell.” He growled before walking to the main door towards her and Jaehyun. He saw how her tensing up when Jaehyun pull out a dark blue velvet box from his pocket making Changmin stop walking and as by looking at her in another man arm couldn’t hurt enough, this time he felt like dying is a better option than watching another man was about to propose to her. He saw how she covered her mouth and she frowned when he reveals a diamond ring to her, she looked uncertain and he was disinterested to know why because he was too clouded by his anger. He was about to give up on everything because the pain was unbearable. Her eyes suddenly wanders and caught his who was staring, taking in all the hurt she had caused that he will later will use it against her while she was in shock that she didn’t even look away when Jaehyun shook her body lightly trying to get her attention back to him, the velvet box was closed and Jaehyun followed her line of sight to find him, Jaehyun was confused that he keep looking back and forth at Changmin and her. With the last strength he could muster in his numb body, he walked out the door heading the opposite way from where they both were standing.

“Changmin wait.” He heard her sweet voice calling for him while Jaehyun calls for hers but he didn’t stop even how much he want to. He fight the voice inside his head that asking him to stay and listen to her explanation, but his heart was hurting and he don’t want to cry or fall back into her, what if she tell lies? No. He wont stop or look back or even gives her the chance to play him. He got into his car and speed up without looking back to save himself from breaking apart and refuse to cry in front of her or anyone. He bit his quivering lips hard before hitting the brake stop by the park when he’s sure that he’s far enough from everyone else where he finally break down into tears. He press his eyes hard using his palm to stop himself from crying.

“How could you.” He cries letting it all out. His heart was broken beyond repair and even she couldn’t fix it. She’s broken glass that he had thrown himself into, and falling for her was like walking on a shattered broken glass, the more he tries to pull the pieces out, the more damage it causes.

Y/N

You smiles closing the door to your room before plopping into your bed shrieking excitedly. You rolled on your back and smile again staring at the ceiling and how you wish that you still staring at his ceiling instead of yours. You decided to take a bath before doing your assignment and call Changmin afterwards. You took out your phone to charge it and realize it was dead for almost 2 days, you smiles again reminiscing the past two day when nothing else matter as long as you have him with you. You turn it on after connecting the charger and it was bombarded by texts and dozens of miscall from Jaehyun washing your smile away. You had forgotten about him for the past two weeks when you were too occupied with Changmin. You were happy and you’re determined that you’ll tell Jaehyun the truth as soon as you can. You decided to check all the text before heading to bathroom.

‘Y/N I’m at Seoul now. Where are you?’

And few asking the same thing but the last and the most recent was the one that made you broke a cold sweats.

‘I love you. I have a surprise for you and for our future. Please call me back. I missed you baby.’

You know what he was about to do because before his semester break, he keep asking about what kind of jewelry do you like and keep showing you a video of man proposing and shit like that and even ask how would you feel if someone proposed to you like that. You suddenly regret for not telling him earlier and making him wait for years. You went to the bathroom to take a shower before calling him as you head out from your room.

“Baby hey, why aren’t you answering my calls?” You stop at your tracks when he greets making inside of you churns at the pet name that he gave without your permission and it somehow made you disgusted with yourself for letting another man other than Changmin calling you that.

“We need to talk. Where are you?” You said urgently, putting on your Vans before walking out of your dorm.

“I’m at the restaurant near your dorm, you want me to come and pick you up?” You know the restaurant located few minutes away just by walking from your dorm and you run. You run hoping that it won't be too late for you to tell him before Kevin does or Changmin. You pretty sure they both hang out together because you knew they both know Kevin and Kevin only have one group of friend. You run without cutting the call until you saw him standing outside the usual restaurant they always went to.

“Oppa.” You call out finally cutting the phone call and he smiles widely as you walked towards him. It kills you that you has to hurt him after knowing what he will do. But you have to, you need to choose between him or Changmin and you didn’t even need to think twice to choose Changmin over anyone else. You stare at him trying to smile back at him, trying blurt out the words you’ve been trying to tell him. But you couldn’t, you were very fond to him, he was your first best friend before he decided to confessed and scared you away. But he never stop chasing you, maybe because you never dare to hurt him or push him away. You love him as a friend but now you need to tell him to stop. You need to tell him the truth.

“Y/N. Oh my god I miss you.” He pulls you into his embrace but you didn’t wrap your hands on him like you always did when Changmin hugs you. You push him away lightly not wanting to hurt him and you hate yourself for doing so. Because you keep on giving him hopes. You don’t mind before because you didn’t have Changmin. But now you have him and you want to cut this non-existent relationship that you and Jaehyun has caught in. You want to stop giving him hopes even if you have no clue how to. You will try anything for god sake.

“I bought something for you.” He pulls out a dark blue velvet box from his pocket and your world came crushing down even you know this will come. You covered your mouth to hide the quivering of your lips when he open the box revealing a diamond ring inside it. If people who doesn’t know your situation they might be feel happy for you. But you almost broke into tears when the guilt started to eat you up. How could you push him when all you could see inside his eyes was sincerity. You stare at his sweet smiley face that was gleaming and it rip you apart because you’re going to take his happiness away. You are the one to blame when his smiles fades and you are the bad guy who will break his heart.

“Can you please marry me? You still can take your master if you want. We can sort things out just like we always did when we’re in high school.” And at the moment you prayed to god that the ground swallowed you whole and you try to avoid his eyes but somehow your eyes found at a pair of eyes that you adores so much from inside the restaurant standing still probably saw the whole thing. You could feel your heart and head stop working and all your senses numbed when you saw the hurt in his eyes. He look away and walked out the door to the opposite side from where you and Jaehyun were and you started to panic.

“Changmin-ah.” You called and started to run after him. But luck wasn’t at you side when he got into his car and drive away leaving you behind.

“No please. Changmin.” You scream on top of your lungs running to the busy road and almost got hit by a speeding car if it wasn’t Kevin who pull you away from the road.

“Kevin.” You whispered as he grab your both arms trying to get you on your senses.

“Just let him settles first. Just let him be.” He pulls you into his embrace as you break down in tears.

“Y/N.” You heard Jaehyun calling your name but you refuse to look up. You afraid that you’ll lash him out when it was your fault in the first place. You know you just broke his heart too and it will kill you to see his face now. You can’t even apologize to him. Its too late now for everything. Its too late to apologize, its too late to explain. Its too late to fix thing and everything was your fault.

“Take me home please Kevin. Take me home.” You plead and you could feel he’s turning his head to Jaehyun.

“I’ll call you later hyung. I’m sorry.” He said before starts walking to your dorm leaving the guy behind.

“I should have warned you yesterday I’m sorry. I just don’t think..” you both were almost at your dorm when he breaks the silence between you two which made you stop walking.

“You knew?” You push his body away from you to take a look on his face. You felt you scalp tightens and got goosebumps from his words.

“Why didn’t tell me Kevin?” You snap at him and trying to throw all the blame at him entirely because you’re being denial. You cant register what you have lose in the span of just thirty minute and now you’re going to lose your best friend too. He was taken aback by your sudden rage at him.

“I didn’t know you already made it official with Changmin Y/N. All of you three are my friend. It wont be fair for Jaehyun hyung If I told you about his plans. Do you think I have the choice? Even if I have I cant choose sides. You all are my friend. I didn’t choose to stuck in your love triangle Y/N. But I have warned you about Jaehyun’s hyung feeling and you did nothing about it. You left the poor guy standing on cliff for god sake.” You cover your mouth as his words hit you hard and pull you back to reality. He was right. It was your fault. It will always be your fault. You throw yourself into the mess.

“Don’t blame me for things that you have started. I’ve done my part Y/N.” He lashes out on you making you broke harder into tears. You feel bad for lashing on him and you run back to your dorm leaving him behind and lock yourself in your bedroom crying all night.

You didn’t attend class the next day, you decided to drive to Changmin’s apartment to apologize and explain everything to him. But when you’re sure you saw his car parked on the parking lot, you went up to his floor and rang his bell. When he didn’t answer the first four time you called him, you knock his door on repeat. But his neighbor came out instead greeting you.

“He went to his parents just now.” He said.

“But his car is downstairs.” You force a smile when you felt yourself frowning to his answer. You’re still being denial. Your sleep deprivation didn’t help much when you’re at your most fragile state that you almost broke down at every mention of his name. But you fight it because you need to find him.

“Yeah he usually take the train whenever he head to his parents. I think you can still catch him now.” He said again watching his watch and you thanked him before rushing to the station looking for him franticly. You know you’re on the right place as his neighbor told you. You force yourself to run everywhere looking at people faces even your energy was drained. You stop to catch your breath almost losing hope after running here and there for a few round. You straightens your back when you sense someone was looking at you. When you look up inside the train, you saw him looking at you without any emotion. As if you’re a stranger to him, you were holding back another sets of tear mouthing ‘please’ to him, begging for him to stay, to listen to you just once. You began to panic when the train door was closing and started moving.

“No. No please. Changmin-ah.” You call as you break down again chasing after him banging the side of the train and running dangerously close to the train. While him, he just looked away from you.

“Changmin please.” You pleaded before stop when you reach the end of the platform. You fall to your knee crying shamelessly ignoring the people who was looking at you. You prayed so hard that you have enough courage to just jump on the railways and kill yourself.

You cried and cried and cried as if no one was watching you until you feel someone wraps a jacket over your shoulder and you look up to see Kevin who was looking back at you.

Kevin

It was during class when he got a call from Jaehyun asking him to pick her up at the station that he had to rush out and take a taxi and sprint to the platform where he saw she was still crying on her knees hands covering her face. He took off his jacket and walked to her covering her petite body and it break him when she look up to him with her swollen eyes from crying. He pulls her up and keep her face covered because some people already taking video of her and take her away from the crowd.

“What are you doing there?” He asked after they both arrives at his shared apartment with Jacob and Eric. He help her settles on the couch before sitting down next to her.

“I was trying to looking for Changmin.” She said in between her sobs.

“Was he there too? Why are you alone then?” He was irritated at Changmin for leaving her alone crying like that. But he can’t blame him either after what happened last night.

“He left. For good.” She cries harder at her own word and it hurts him too to see her like that. How he wish he could just told her about Jaehyun plans or told Jaehyun about her feeling on her behalf. He had nothing to say because he know how much she love Changmin even before they started dating. He pulls her body closer to him letting her cry on his shoulder.

“How did you know I was there?”

“Jaehyun was looking for Changmin too, but he saw you came out from Changmin’s apartment building and he followed your car. He wanted to comfort you, but he’s afraid that he’ll end up messing up your emotion more. So, he called me.” She didn’t react to his explanation but he know she was lost too. This is her first heartbreak and to put all the blame on her isn’t fair because it's like blaming her for being innocent. For being too nice not daring to reject Jaehyun because she was afraid, she’ll hurt him. But in the end, everyone is hurt.

“I’m sorry Kev, for everything I said last night.” He pat her head slowly.

“Its fine.”

“I’m sorry for dragging you along with this shit that I made.”

“Hush. Just stop crying. You’ll find another one.” He know it was impossible for her because she’s kind of reserved whenever she is around strangers and it’s a miracle that Changmin could get through the thick wall that she have built up to separate her from others. Even Jaehyun who she have known for years couldn’t make it into her heart after years of trying.

While he himself was a special case, he met her during registration when he and she both came late and almost got into trouble if wasn’t for him who talked the dean out saving both asses from penalties. He’s been the only person she ever talked to and became best friend ever since. He helped her deal with her anti social even she didn’t change much, but he helped her out with gaining confidence while singing by forcing her to sing with his friend Jacob every weekend. He met Jaehyun through her when she constantly avoiding the guy by hiding behind his back and he had to make up tons of excuses for her to get away from him.

“I wont say that I know how you feel because it would be a lie. But lets just focus on this week. Its your long awaited solo. Lets focus solely on that. Okay?” He caress her hair gently and she nodded.

“You can sleep upstairs, Jacob and Eric will be back soon and I don’t want them to see you like this.”

“Thank you Kevin. What would I do without you.” She lifts her head from his shoulder and he could feel his heart suddenly beating abnormally harder at the close proximate of her face with his chin that he could feel her breath tickles his skin.

He straightens his body up pushing her gently away from his shoulder to shake any feeling from forming inside him even he know it was always been there.

“You’ll live Y/N. I promise.” He looked into her red eyes and then to her red nose making him chuckle.

“What.” She whined adorably still so fragile.

“You look like a clown. Your nose.” He was about to poke it but stop himself from doing so afraid he would fall by such a simple gesture.

“You should get some rest.” He exhaled still looking at her wearing his jacket and she still look good even when she’s a mess and it hurts him to see her like that. He sent her to his room before decided to call Changmin himself. But all his calls goes straight to the voicemails.

A/N: This one a bit long but thank you anyway for reading it. Ahh Kevin, my second bias, i just couldn’t help to put some back story about him and how he’s been crushing on reader for quite sometimes. But that’s just it. He might be getting his own fics later. but i hope you enjoyed this one. Two more chapter will be shorter i promise. Thank you again.

#tbz scenarios #tbz Q #tbz kevin #ji changmin scenario #ji changmin #tbz ji changmin #the boyz #the boyz scenarios #hyunjae

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bangtan-sonyeonddaeng · 5 years

Text

Yoongi Scenario| Crossing paths without meeting, all of it destiny

Summary: On a lonely night you decide to text a random number on a whim in hopes of making a new friend. You fully weren’t expecting anyone to respond, so imagine your surprise when you received a response back and soon realized maybe fate was on your side for once.

This is fluff fluff and more fluff. <3

You sigh heavily as you stare at your wall. You’re tightly clutching your pillow and hugging it to your chest as you lay in bed as you have been all day. You feel a weight on your chest, a sadness and pretty soon a few tears start to stream down your face and onto your pillow. You hastily wipe them away willing for the tears to stop. For the entire day the only emotions you have been feeling are loneliness and sadness. You are craving a connection with somebody, anybody. It is that very thought that wills you to take out your phone, and text a random number in search of a friend when you need one the most.

You: I’m depressed and lonely plz respond.

It’s a random message, you try to lighten your own mood with humor in hopes that maybe someone will give you a funny answer back. You don’t know why you picked this random number, it just seemed to pop into your head. You save the contact name as random stranger. You give it 5 minutes before you give up and throw your phone on the bed sighing heavily.

“I knew this was a stupid idea.” You say to yourself. You shut your eyes tightly in hopes that you'll fall asleep. You are just about to drift off when your phone chimes with a new message.

Random Stranger: Who the hell is this? Are you aware that it is 3:00 in the fucking morning. I swear to god if this is Taehyung playing some stupid joke I will end you.

Out of all the people you could have messaged, it had to be this one. Your stranger seemed awfully grumpy in his message. But then again you'd be mad too if you were woken up at 3am. You hadn't realized the time when you sent out that message and immediately felt bad.

You: What’s a Taehyung?

Grumpy Stranger: Cut it out you asshole I’m trying to sleep. I know where you live and I will cut you.

You: Oh I highly doubt you know where I live since I just texted a random number. Looks like you were the lucky winner.

Grumpy Stranger: ...

Wait you’re serious? So you actually just texted a random number that you were lonely?

You: Yeah pretty much.. Pretty pathetic huh? I don’t have any friends who actually want to talk to me so I went seeking a random stranger to talk to. Sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep and just forget this ever happened.

Grumpy Stranger: No, wait.

I’m sorry.

I shouldn’t have snapped at you I just genuinely thought you were my friend trying to mess with me. Uh, I’m not exactly sociable but.. if it helps you feel better I’ll stick around.

You: No really it’s fine. I’ll be okay just had a moment of weakness.

Goodnight

Slightly less grumpy stranger: I’m not tired anymore you might as well just stay awake and talk to me. It’s the least you can do for waking me from my peaceful slumber.

You: ... Okay.

Slightly less grumpy stranger: Okay then. How about if you start of by telling me your name?

You: It’s y/n.

Slightly less grumpy stranger: Where are you from?

You: Okay I know I said I was lonely but I’m not trying to get murdered.

You could be some mass murderer for all I know I am not telling you where I live.

Slightly less grumpy stranger: Fair enough.

My name is Yoongi by the way.

You: Aw and I was happy with my contact name I had for you now I have to change it.

Yoongi: What did you have it as?

You: Well

I changed it throughout the course of this conversation.

First you were random stranger, then you were grumpy stranger, then you graduated to slightly less grumpy stranger. But now you’re just Yoongi. Boring.

Yoongi: Maybe you can think of something more clever the more we get to know each other.

I had some contact names for you too.

You giggle at that, wondering what he could possibly have set your contact name as.

Yoongi: First you were ‘little shit Taehyung’

You read that and immediately burst into laughter.

Yoongi: Then you were weirdo, then lonely weirdo. And now you're just weirdo y/n.

You: Alright well fine then I am saving you as grumpy yoongi in my phone then if you're going to insult me and call me weirdo. You brought this upon yourself.

Grumpy Yoongi: I’m not that grumpy you brat.

You: Don’t call me brat I could be older than you. Or wait maybe you're an old man. Oof what did I get myself into.

Grumpy Old man: I’m not an old man! I’m in my 20′s. Not gonna tell you my exact age since you could also be some crazy murderer. 😜

You: Did you really just use an emoji with me Yoongi? Look at how our friendship is progressing! Also I’m not a crazy murder. Promise.

Grumpy Yoongi: That’s probably exactly what you say before you lure in your victims.

You laugh again and instantly find that you are comfortable with this Yoongi. You guys didn’t get off on the best foot at the start, but having seen this new side of him you are actually growing quite fond of this stranger.

Grumpy Yoongi: You laughed didn’t you?

You: Yeah I did.

You’ve actually made me laugh on quite a few occasions. You're funny.

Grumpy Yoongi: I’m going to have to screen shot that and show my friends. They think I’m some boring old man but now I can show them some kind stranger called me funny. HA take that Taehyung.

You: This Taehyung sounds like quite a character.

Grumpy Yoongi: He is. He’s hilarious. Even though he’s a pain in my ass I actually am quite fond of him and couldn’t ask for a better friend.

You: I’m glad you have people like that in your life, Yoongi. You should cherish him dearly.

Grumpy Yoongi: You okay? I mean I know we don’t hardly know each other but.. You said you were depressed I just want to make sure you don't need me to call anyone for you..

You: Oh, no I am alright. Even if I wasn't though there’s no one to call.

You sigh heavily and start to feel that familiar sadness creeping up again. However no sooner than the feeling came did it disappear.

Grumpy Yoongi: Well you have me now.

You: Waht thjhe fukc

is taht you?!

Yoongi: Yes?

You: HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LOOK SO GOOD AT 3AM I LOOK LIKE FREAKING GOLLUM.

THE WORLD IS NOT FAIR.

WHO DID YOU SACRIFICE TO BE BLESSED WITH A FACE LIKE THAT?

Handsome Yoongi: What’s a Gollum?

You: Who is... Who is Gollum?!

What the hell have you never seen The Lord of the Rings? Or The Hobbit??

Handsome Yoongi: No?

You: I take it back.

We can’t be friends.

By the way this is Gollum I hope it fuels your nightmares.

Handsome Yoongi: What the fuck?!

That thing is terrifying as shit what the hell kind of movies are you watching ffs.

Get that thing off my screen.

You: skljdf;wje

]slkjf;ewijrjwbr;jqr

kjsenr;wehr;iq

weoirj;wijrq

Is it gone now?

Handsome Yoongi: lol yes thank you.

You’re cute. I’m sure if your looks match your personality you’re adorable.

There is no way you look like that creepy.. whatever the hell that is.

You: Shit now I’m blushing

You smooth talker look at you go trying to win my heart over and stuff.

Handsome Yoongi: Is it working?

You: ... Maybe a little.

Handsome Yoongi: Good :)

Are you feeling better?

You: After seeing that beautiful face of yours I feel like I can conquer the whole world.

Handsome Yoongi: Lol and you said I was a sweet talker? Listen to you.

Seriously though are you feeling less lonely now?

You: If I say yes are you going to leave?

Handsome Yoongi: Of course not.

You’ve seen my bare faced selfie at 3am you know too much

so guess you’re stuck with me.

Sorry those are the rules.

You: I ain’t even mad about it.

But I to answer your question yes, I am feeling much better. When I messaged you this was not what I was expecting to be honest..

Handsome Yoongi: What were you expecting?

You: To be ignored.. like always.

You see the 3 dots appear on your phone as Yoongi seems to be typing a lot. You wait a few minutes before his message finally comes through.

Handsome Yoongi: Listen, I don’t know what kind of assholes you had in your life but they didn’t value you at all. In just the short conversation we’ve had I can already tell anyone would be lucky to have you in their lives. You’re funny, you’re caring and kind, and witty. Honestly you’re one of the most down to earth people I have talked to. If people can't realize that then fuck them. They don’t deserve you.

You reread the message at least 3 more times, letting his words really sink in before you text him back. You’re in the middle of typing when he sends you another message.

Kind Yoongi: You alright?

Did I say too much?

Shoot I probably came on too strong and scared you away.

Or maybe you’re just asleep.

In that case I should stop texting you or you might wake up shit I’m sorry I’ll shut up now.

You: I’m here. Just typing back something long give me a sec.

Kind Yoongi: Okay.

You: Yoongi you have no idea how much that means to me. To hear you say that, it’s exactly what I needed to hear right now. I think fate was kind to me today in making sure you were the one I texted. I can’t even begin to describe how happy you’ve made me in just the short amount of time we’ve been talking. You’ve made me laugh so much that my cheeks hurt from smiling and I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to thank you.

Kind Yoongi: Just keep talking to me and that’s all I need from you.

Honestly I’ve been in kind of a rut lately too.

But talking to you really helped me feel better.

Even though our paths may never cross, I just want you to know this is enough for me. You’re enough.

You: I swear to god if you make me cry one more time Yoongi..

Kind Yoongi: D: Sorry!

Anyway it’s late!

Get some sleep okay? I’ll be here in the morning just text me when you wake up.

You: Promise?

Yoongi:

Promise.

You: Whut lol did you change your shirt or something just to send me a selfie?

Kind Yoongi: I was in a robe before. I just finally got my ass out of bed to change into my pajamas.

You: #mood

Kind Yoongi: Alright no more texting get some rest!

You: I will.

Um. Yoongi?

Kind Yoongi: Yeah, beautiful?

You: Thank you..

Kind Yoongi: You don’t need to thank me. Sweet dreams, angel <3 I’ll talk to you in the morning.

#BTS reaction #BTS reactions #BTS scenario #BTS scenarios #BTS imagine #BTS imagines #bts #min yoongi #suga #yoongi x reader #reader x yoongi #suga x reader #reader x suga #yoongi reaction #yoongi scenario #yoongi imagine #suga reaction #suga scenario #suga imagine

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freeshavacado · 4 years

Text

My thoughts while reading Gone by Michael Grant:

* wait how old is Sam

* He do be liking Astrid doe

* Damn so Sam is a Leader

* Ew Orc is an 8th grader? 🤮

* Ok I googled it Sam is 14

* I like Quinn

* Sam thinks he’s so awkward but he’s actually really chill so far

* THE PAIN THIS GIRL IS GOING THROUGH OH MY GOD

* Poor Mary :(

* Howard’s a bitch

* Cut to Quinn being a racist motherfucker

* I love Edilio

* Sam is WHIPPED for Astrid

* Orc is such a piece of shiiiiiit

* LANAAAAA :(((

* Poor thing is in so much pain

* Patrick her dog is alive so that’s good

* She’s deadass slowly dying

* Thank god her arm is better

* I want to make this into a TV series

* If Sam and Astrid don’t kiss at some point I swear

* Hahahaha Sam do be shirtless rn

* Why isn’t Astrid happy to see Little Pete???

* MARY. IF YOU POUR HOT ASS COFFEE ON A CHILD, DONT JUST STAND THERE AND THEN RUN AWAY. PUT COLD WATER ON THE BURN

* Aw Mary has had bulimia since she was ten :(

* Ok so what she just took her Prozac and then threw up? Wouldn’t the pill go up too? I think your stomach/body needs like 30 minutes to absorb it into the blood stream...

* HELP SAM HES CHOKING

* Bruh my ass would be so exhausted

* Quinn low key an ass tho

* Lol edilio isn’t standing for this bullshit

* Lmaooo Astrid knew 💀

* Omg little Pete has it too

* Wow Quinn is an asshole pt 2

* I feel like Caine is gonna be a villain...like he’s pretty AND nice? Nah bro too good to be true

* Fucking Orc god 😒😒😒

* Caine is up to some shit 🤨

* Lmao hold up

* Diana probably whipped tho

* Sam please only be a simp for Astrid 😩

* I bet Drake is hot

* Aww computer Jack :) DONT YOU TURN ON ME SON

* “The captain is already maintaining” Bullshit 💀

* Are they really gonna call this eighth grader ‘Captain’?

* LMAOOO THE BASTARD CANT EVEN READ OR WRITE 💀💀💀

* Lol making Sam the fire chief because he was brave enough to go into a fire one time, so therefore he is the most qualified

* Bruh that’s like if I gave a kid the Heimlich maneuver bc he was choking on a gummy worm or some shit and they were like “Well because she did that, she should be the head doctor!!!”

* CAINE IS FULL OF SUCH BULLSHIT OML

* PRETENDING TO CRY N SHIT GOD

* I already know that Diana is gonna try and seduce Sam while she’s actually a spy for the private school kids

* Which, btw, of course it’s the private school kids smh

* I feel like maybe Computer Jack will be someone who eventually switches to the Good Side

* ALSO wow jack really be thinking that he’s smarter than Astrid smh 🙄

* Jack is such a smartsass

* Diana is such a fucking bitch oh my god 😒😒😒

* “You don’t look tough, Astrid” STFU SHES THE TOUGHEST OF THEM ALL

* Ok but I bet Diana and Astrid low key have sexual tension. Like obviously nothing’s gonna happen...but still

* Bruh I hate Caine

* Fuckin Diana with her ‘readings’ bullshit smh

* YESSSS LANA 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 so strong

* Literally how do they not know how to make pasta

* “I thought your people ate tortillas,” QUINN YOU RACIST PEICE OF SHIT UGH

* Poor Bette :(

* Orc is a piece of shit, I know we’ve already established this but I wanted to say it again

* I love Edilio so much

* Orc really using a slur against Edilio huh. Imma kill him

* IM SO DONE WITH QUINN. THIS BITCH REALLY JUST SAID “let him have her” LIKE TF????

* Drake is such a bastard oh my god

* If you hate Quinn and you know it clap your hands 👏🏻👏🏻

* No seriously. I fucking hate him.

* Nooooo Bette died :((

* “I can’t kiss you with your little brother watching” AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

* Did they kiss or not wtf

* What the hell is up with this cat

* Ah so they did kiss!!

* Why didn’t I get details 🤨

* No a baby died 😞

* Quinn s u c k s

* How convenient that Sam got there *right* before Emma disappeared

* Those last 6 minutes before Anna disappeared too and was calling out to her sister, and so for what she thought was her last few minutes on earth she held sams hand :(

* Lol Diana sucks

* ‘WoRDs DONT sCArE mE’ shut up Drake

* Okay Computer Jack is definitely going to betray them because they underestimate him and take him for granted

* You’re telling me Caine and Sam could be TWINS???

* Why was the kiss ‘a mistake’ ?

* Okay NOW they’re awkward

* “But it was the first time I meant it” I CANT. ITS SO CHEESY

* I HATE QUINN

* These kids are crazy violent

* Fuck Diana

* Yikes now Sam only has some of his eyebrows left 😬

* Caine is in love with Diana 👀

* Little Pete might be more powerful than Caine 😛

* THESE KIDS ARE CRAZY LIKE CHILL

* Diana: I really dislike you Astrid: of course you dislike me, I make you feel inferior

* ROASTED ^

* Mmmm Quinn is trying to redeem himself

* “Don’t call me brah. I’m not your brother” OHHHHHHHHHHH HE REALLY WENT THERE

* that’s what you get for being a backstabbing asshole

* Poor Astrid :(

* Poor Little Pete :(

* Bro I need this to be a movie

* I love that Sam just punched Quinn like we had no choice but to stan

* Ok drake would definitely shoot up a school

* Fuck Drake

* Lana is so strong. Like she’s been in so much pain physically and mentally, and she almost died. But she saved herself and now even though she thinks she might be the only person left alive on earth, she is still keeping strong.

* What happens if the boat runs out of gas?

* Bruh these coyotes don’t give up

* THE COYOTES AGAIN??

* “Go out” “You’ll kill me,” “Yes. Go out, die fast. Stay, die slow”

* Wowwwwwwwwwww^

* Lmaooo “L.P.”

* Awwww Sam: “...she was still so beautiful that sometimes he had to look away.”

* Okay he a lil’ horny

* Awe Astrid and Sam hugging I’m soft 🥺

* I’m so sick of these damn coyotes

* Bruh these coyotes 😒

* Diana is annoying

* Literally can’t remember who Andrew is, but they’re about to film his passing away like wtf

* Poor Andrew :(

* “You’re a deep sleeper, Jack. Just now, while you were sleeping? I held your pudgy little hand. Probably as close as you’ll ever get to holding hands with a girl. Assuming you even like girls.” FUCK YOU DIANA

* Okay so Diana will protect Jack as long as he ‘belongs’ to her and does what ever she wants? That’s pretty sus

* Sam and Astrid kissed again 😖☺️

* Lmaooo Albert over here running McDonald’s

* Salads disappeared quickly from the McDonald’s menu since this whole thing? Who the hell orders a salad from McDonald’s?

* So Albert kinda whipped for Mary 👀

* I haaaaatttteeee the private school kids

* Y’know what depending on where I was and who I was with in this situation, I might’ve just killed myself

* “Remember who owns you” ew 🤨

* Diana. I hate you

* Bro I feel bad for Andrew

* How is Lana back at the cabin?

* That IS Lana right??

* Okay things are moving fast between Sam and Astrid. Like she’s already saying “I just want you here with me. Safe” like 🤢

* Lana, about Sam: your boyfriend? Astrid: ThAts nOt WhAt iTs AbouT

* LMAOO AFTER SHE SAID THAT SHE SAID IN A LOW VOICE “kind of” WHAT

* Lol Lana be out here like “yeah shits crazy. Get with the program”

* Ew they’re eating pudding with their hands 🤮

* I don’t care how hungry you are, that’s gross

* Like get a spoon or something

* Lana just called Astrid “smart girl Barbie” 🤨

* Part of me is like “lol” but the other part of me is like “bruh stop Astrid did nothing wrong”

* I still hate Quinn but he is kind of funny

* Lana calling Astrid “the blonde” like girl 😑

* Bruh you’re stuck in a house that is literally on fire and getting hotter by the second as it fills with smoke, now is not the time to be kissing Astrid

* Finally the damn coyotes are gone.

* Sam is so angry and he’s disgusted with himself for being so angry, I relate

* Fuck you, Quinn

* Fuck drake

* I would gladly kill Drake

* OOOOOOOOO EDILIO LIKES LANA AHHHHHH

* SIMP

* omg I love it 😩

* Lmaooooo Sams speech wow

* Sam you should NOT forgive Quinn. Especially not that fast. Yikes.

* Orc should feel bad for killing Bette. I have no pity for him rn

* Yes please kill drake.

* I am so happy that his arm is on fire. 100% he deserves to feel that pain

* Aww that’s kinda nice that Albert is planning thanksgiving dinner for everyone

* DAMMIT DRAKE

* I hate drake so much like dude just shut up and leave everyone alone

* Orc oh my god I could not be rolling my eyes harder right now

* Tbh if Orc and his other friends die, I’m okay with that

* What tf is up with this DVD

* Little Pete caused all of this??? 😦

* I’m sooooo sick of this whole darkness and coyote stuff istg

* Where is Patrick?????

* If Patrick is dead imma throw hands

* Diana is such an evil person. Like Drake is a monster, but she’s horrible in a different way.

* Also ughhhhhhhhhh Drake is back 😒😒😒😒😒 so sick of that mf

* “So. When do we go take down Sam Temple?” 🙄🙄🙄 no one likes you Drake

* AHAHAHHSJAHSHSHHSHD

* SAM JUST TOLD ASTRID HE LOVED HER

* AND SHE SAID IT BACK

* IM. S O F T

* (like my brain is still saying “y’all have talked for less than two weeks and you’re 14”)

* But like whatever 😭❤️

* My eyes just rolled into the back of my skull once Diana appeared

* Taylor low key flirting with Sam tho 👀

* When I first met Dekka, I was all: ‘what the hecka?’

* THOSE DAMN COYOTES

* I’m crying because Quinn couldn’t kill Drake because he was scared, and now children are screaming. Ugh I really wanted him to kill Drake but I understand that killing someone is a crazy thing to have on your conscience

* Call me cold hearted, but I would’ve shot him

* This is all in theory of course ^ I bet if I was in that situation though it wouldn’t be as easy as “just shoot him”

* I don’t think I’ve ever been more annoyed with a fictional character than I am with Drake rn

* Yooo I bet Isabella has some animal powers or sumn

* Caine 🙄🙄🙄 like that emoji doesn’t even come close to describing how annoyed I am

* Wait so is Patrick back now or...?

* Caine really just. Kissed Diana. Because she “owed him”????

* THIS IS SOME BULLSHIT

* I literally hate sooooooooo many characters in this book ugh 😒😒😒

* Quinn is watching Drake kill Sam and is doing nothing. I’m so done with this piece of shit

* Ok finally he tried to shoot him

* “You know it always gets me hot when you say ‘apt analogy.’” “Why do you think I do it?”

* Y’all 🥴🥴🥴

* THOSE DAMN COYOTES

* Literally? Imagine being this heartless. Giving up hundreds of kids to coyotes without hesitation. The hate I have for Caine is real

* Once again, Orc feeling bad for what he did to Bette. And honestly? I’m still okay with that

* This kid is an a l c o h o l i c

* Computer Jack is so annoying like dude stop holding on to Sams leg. Literally

* Still hate Diana, but I like that she’s helping out Sam a little bit

* Ew Diana just kissed Sam on the corner of his mouth 🤢

* I TOLD YALL ^^^

* Yay Patrick is alive :)

* “I guess we won,” Sam said. “Yeah,” Edilio agreed. “I’ll get the backhoe. Got a lot of holes to dig.”

* ^im. Depressed

* I cannot for the life of me remember who Cookie is

* “Orc sat with Howard in a corner by themselves. Orc had fought Drake to a standstill. But no one-least of all Orc-had forgotten Bette.”

* ^good.

* Y’all Sam and Astrid flirting I- 🥴🥴

* We love to see it ^

* Awww “we’re going to the beach” y’all Astrid and Sam are so cute

* THOSE DAMN COYOTES

* FUCK. Goddamn this cliffhanger 😡

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actuallyrandomperson · 4 years

Text

I wanna ramble about how I experience dysphoria as a genderfluid person for a bit, and my identity in general, so I figured Tumblr was a good place to do it.

So, for starters, I should probably clarify how I'm fluid, as all of us are a little different in how we experience gender. I was assigned female at birth, and, to be completely honest, I wish I was amab. This shocks some people, especially as I tend to sit on the female/demigirl/nonbinary side of things, but it's true. Realistically, I know my life would be a lot different if I had been, and I would have experienced a different set of struggles, but in an idealistic world, where nothing would change about me except the way my body looked and what pronouns were used for me, I'd want to be assigned male. I could not care less what genitals I have, especially since I'm ace so it has no real effect on how I'm gonna live my life, this relates back to the two other most obvious issues with being afab: Periods, and boobs.

I hate getting my period. As most people do. I don't even have particularly painful ones, just some semi-bad cramps on the first day or two, but I hate it anyway. 9 times out of 10 I'm non-binary on the first day of my period. Whether that's related to hormone levels or some subconscious part of my brain whispering "hey periods suck being a girl sucks why were u born a girl", I do not know. I just know it happens.

I also hate my boobs whenever I'm not female. Including when I'm demigirl. I don't hate the idea of boobs in general when I'm demigirl, and don’t think I need to be completely flat-chested to feel happy when I’m non-binary (but that could come back to me doubting I’ll get fully flat without surgery), I just hate my boobs. That is because I am incredibly busty, especially for someone who is 5'1/155 cm tall. I'm an Aus 10G/US 32I, I have small shoulders (my straps slip down no matter how tight we pull them), and a large part of what made figuring out my gender identity hell was the constant question of whether me hating my boobs was an ace thing (not wanting to be constantly sexualised) or a gender thing. My best fitting bra actually helped me figure that out, as reportedly it made me look smaller (i.e. technically less likely to be sexualised) but it had the side benefit of making my boobs, well, actually look like boobs, and when I looked at myself in the mirror I wanted to claw my eyes out. So. 90% of the time I hate my boobs because they're so big, and 100% of the time I hate my period.

You might be sitting here, reading this, and going "but Em, are you sure you're genderfluid? Not just demigirl or nonbinary or agender or any of the other non-binary identities?" My answer to that is, well, sorta no. And sorta yes. No, in the fact that I've never been sure about anything in my life. Maybe time will go on, and I'll begin to identify with some other label, or no labels at all. Yes, in the fact that genderfluid feels right right now, and that's all that matters. Humans change. In turn, labels can change too. Hell, as a genderfluid person, my labels technically change on almost a day to day basis! That doesn't make my feelings and my identity at any single moment any less valid. It also doesn't mean that long term, I'll wake up one day and realise that I actually just identify with x gender. It just means that it could happen, and that’s ok, just as it's okay that my identity is changing constantly at the moment. Side note, while we're talking about labels- you also don't need to identify with one! I personally like to use them, as they bring me comfort, but everyone is different, and y'all who choose not to use labels for whatever reasons are entirely valid.

I have 4 main types of day, gender-wise. Days where I feel like a girl, days where I feel kinda like a girl, days where I feel non-binary, and days where my gender is that 'women' shrugging emoji (that I use all the time because long hair babeyyyy also their shirt is purple on iOS and purple rules). Day 4 I mostly lump under demigirl, as with day 2. Day 3 could probably be most accurately described with agender, or a similar identity label, but I find it personally easiest to just refer to myself as non-binary on said days.

In a hard to explain way, I feel as though I experience less dysphoria on days where I am demigirl than on days where I am fully female. This is not entirely accurate, and is almost certainly as a result of me having unintentionally put in place coping mechanisms for said days in terms of how I present myself for years now, and probably isn’t the right terms for me to use, but it's true.

You see, I dress in a fairly gender-neutral way. My presentation has still always come off as feminine, as I love my long hair and enjoy nail polish, but I've always hated shaving, and I avoid wearing dresses and skirts as much as possible in my day-to-day. I don't mind wearing dresses etc when I'm demigirl, I just don't gravitate towards them, and when I'm demigirl I generally present as a not-overly feminine girl whose a little uncomfortable with their body shape and likes to be comfy, and wears heels in an effort to be taller rather than as a fashion statement.

But when I'm fully a girl, I often love being feminine. I usually want to wear dresses/skirts, and jewellery, and lipstick (not any other makeup though, years of dance and stage makeup ruined me- if someone puts it on for me and it's not heavy/powdery I'm not actively adverse, though), and have my hair braided, and generally just to Get Prettied Up. But that’s not 'me' to other people. That’s not the person I've presented myself as for years. I've spent my entire life catering to my demigirl and non-binary days because they're more common, and whenever I do lean into my feminine self on girl days my family and a lot of my friends are kinda surprised. I wore lipstick and nice clothes to two separate movie hangouts with two different friends, and one of them (who I hadn't seen in a while, to be fair) commented on how it was unusual for me while the other looked visibly surprised. It's not a coincidence that the two irl people I'm out to outside of my schools lgbt+ club are my brother and my best friend- both of whom complimented me (in a non-creepy way with my brother slvjfk) when they saw me wear lipstick for simple things last year, without making a big deal out of it. My mum still acts shocked and gets excited about me being feminine when I express an interest into buying clothes from a particular brand (Princess Highway/Dangerfield in general, for my fellow Aussies, as I don’t think they exist in the US) even though I've been getting presents from there for a few years now. She's talked about slowly starting to replace my clothes with 'fashionable stuff' from places like Dangerfield as the years go on now that I've 'expressed an interest in nice clothes' and I feel anxiety start to ball up in my stomach, because I don't want to wear fashionable clothes all the time, because fashionable for me, closeted and big-chested as I am, means feminine. When I present or show interest in presenting in a more feminine way on my female days, my mother and a few people I'm surrounded by unintentionally make me feel guilty about not wishing to present like that all the time, make my dysphoric for my future and past self, and make me doubt myself as a genderfluid person because I wish to present as my birth gender on one day.

So rather than dealing with all that, I don't present in a more feminine way unless I'm going out, and even then, avoid wearing lipstick if my mum is home, or coming with me. If I can, I'll stick a tube into my bag to apply when I get to wherever I'm going, but it's not always possible. I have Safiya Nygaard’s colourpop collection hidden away in my room. I continue to present myself in a way that aligns more closely in my mind to my demigirl days, with the slight change of being able to actually look at myself in the mirror for extended periods of time, being ok with my slightly more tight-fitting tops, and being chill with wearing my best bra. And I feel, as a whole, dysphoric on these days. I am not happy with how my gender presentation is, because it does not reflect how I want to present. Dysphoria is probably not the exact right term to use to describe these feelings, given I'm afab but it is the easiest way for me to put it, as it most closely reflects the unhappiness I feel with my presentation on my non-binary days, it's just my non-binary days come with a whole lot more body-related dysphoria piled on top. A song I like to listen to on female days is Platform Ballerinas, by MIKA, as it helps remind me that I am a girl, and the way I'm presenting as a girl is valid even if it's not exactly how I want to (it doesn't actually fully come back to societal expectations placed on women because I might shave my armpits but my leg hair still stays, and I genuinely want to get prettied up rather than feeling like I should to be seen as a girl, it's just something I want to do and not being able to makes me feel whack, but the song is definitely more focused on the whole 'societal expectations suck y'all are all valid' thing).

Non-binary days suck in the same way I've heard a lot of trans people of all varieties discuss. I hate walking past mirrors, if I have to wear feminine clothing for whatever reason I feel like I'm going to cry, she/her pronouns kinda make me want to die (generally I'm chill with she/they, and on female days they/them is okay, but she/her on nonbinary days makes my dysphoric as hell), and I generally Do Not Have A Great Time dysphoria wise. But hey, one day I’ll have enough money for a binder. Eventually. I always feel weird about entering giveaways given there are people who experience extreme dysphoria around their chest every day, I can deal on my demigirl days and survive on my non-binary ones.

So, that’s been me rambling into the void about gender for almost 2000 words, how are y’all doing? Also, if anyone actually read all of this I’d appreciate like,,, a like. Or something. I kinda want to know if people have actually seen and read this.

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