#there is still somehow that voice in my head that’s like
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How would you do a short free-use story staring your favorite idol?
Thanks for the ask! Although I'm not sure what you mean exactly with "How" Do you want me to explain it or write it? I decided to just write it, hope you enjoy. @mechaknight-98 I saw your other request, I will get to it when I have the time.
(I hope I understood the concept of free-use correctly)
White
Kim Jisoo X Male Reader
You hear voices behind the door, after you rang the doorbell. Footsteps come closer and you take a step back. A moment later, the door is being opened.
For a moment, you are stunned by her beauty. How can a person be so pretty? So perfect? You smell her flowery scent. Maybe roses.
Her eyes grow big once she realises who is standing in front of her.
"(Y/n), I-I..."
Jisoo stutters, too surprised to see you standing in front of her parent's mansion. The young heiress of the Kim Group is usually very well spoken.
"What are you doing here?"
"Just came back from a business trip. I haven't had your pussy in weeks."
You catch her flinching.
Despite the amount of times you've already taken advantage of your arrangement, she is still uncomfortable talking about it openly.
"S-Sure. Please follow me."
Jisoo turns around and leads you inside her parent's place, after you shut the door behind you. You walk behind her, enjoying the view of her naked shoulders. The back of her necklace sparkles in the light of the chandelier in the hallway.
Approaching the big wooden stairs in the middle of the house, the two of you pass by the entrance to the dining room.
"Jisoo!"
She freezes in place, before you both look into the room. You recognize her parents, who sit on one side of the table. A chair is empty, the one next to it is occupied by Jisoo's fiance.
"Who is this man?"
Her father looks at you in suspicion.
"He is a business partner of mine. We are headed to my study, cause we have to make an important decision on the future of our companies' relationship, which can't be delayed."
That's the Jisoo everyone knows. The strong, independent and successful businesswoman. The complete opposite of the Jisoo you know. Your submissive, free-use toy.
Her father nods in approval, visibly oblivious. You do a short bow in his direction. Jisoo starts walking again. Her chin raised, back straight.
Halfway up the stairs, you can't help it anymore. She just looks flawless. And you really have been longing for her for weeks.
You reach out, your hand squeezing her ass through her white dress. Jisoo jumps, but she doesn't say anything. She keeps walking as if nothing is happening. After squeezing her right cheek a couple of times, you stop walking, making her stop too.
"Suck me off."
Jisoo turns around. You are almost at the top of the stairs already. You see the confusion in her eyes. Why can't you wait one more minute?
But she doesn't talk back. Jisoo carefully gets on her knees in front of you, making sure she doesn't mess up her dress somehow.
A moment later, your cock lands on her face. Jisoo closes her eyes, taking a deep breath as she savours your smell. You can tell that your absence made her sexually frustrated.
"Are you still waiting until you married him?"
It's an odd question to ask, when the soon to be bride is giving the tip of your dick a sensual kiss.
"Yes. But he keeps trying to initiate something. I don't know if he is gonna wait until he puts a wedding ring on my finger."
You sigh as your gaze gets caught on the big silver diamond ring on her ring finger. The hand it's on is stroking your cock, while she talks.
"I don't like it. But I can't blame him."
You reach down and cup her cheek. Jisoo leans into it, looking up at you with big eyes.
"A woman like you could make a man do whatever she wants. You are fucking gorgeous."
You quickly realize the irony of your words. You are making her do whatever you want.
"Thank you."
A shy smile plays around her lips. Jisoo still can't take compliments. At least when they are coming from you.
After your quick exchange, she finally starts giving you head properly. You can't believe how much of a slut you've turned her into. She is sucking you off in the middle of her parents house in plain sight, while her parents and her boyfriend are in the room next door.
"That's a good girl."
You encourage Jisoo as she bobs her head on your cock. You've missed her mouth. The way her lips wrap around you. The way her tongue glides along your length. The way her throat tightens, when you push past her gag reflex.
As exciting and adventurous this little scene might be, you know that you will get caught sooner rather than later, if you don't move on.
"Let's go to your room. I don't want to waste my time here when I could be in there, plowing your pussy like I own it."
You help Jisoo to her feet, catching the slight blush on her cheeks.
"Because I do."
You whisper into her ear, before spinning her around.
The two of you finally make it down the hallway without any further incidents. Once you reach her room, you walk inside, waiting for her to close the door behind her.
She has turned into a shy, innocent girl once again. You lean against Jisoo, pressing her against the door, kissing every inch of her exposed skin.
"How did I even make it these couple of weeks without this body of yours?"
It was a rhetoric question between kisses, but Jisoo tries to come up with an explanation. An explanation that satisfies you.
"I send you several pictures of me every day. And videos. I kept thinking of you while I..."
A growl escapes your lips. The power you have over her right now gives you a familiar rush of adrenaline.
"Strip."
You sit down on the edge of her bed, crossing your arms in front of you. If you were sitting on a chair at your desk, it would've looked like Jisoo was there to apply for an internship.
She shyly brushes all of her hair on her right side behind her ear.
"Can you help me please?"
Jisoo turns around. She know uses her whole hand to put all of her hair over her left shoulder. You reach upwards, taking the zipper of her dress, before slowly pulling it down. Your eyes follow her dress as she lets it slip down her frame.
Her porcelain like skin and her white lace panties captivate you. Her fiance must go mad, knowing she is together with him and he still can't have her.
The sight of Jisoo, standing in front of you almost completely naked, makes you finally jump into action. You pin her against the door, before she can react. Your pants are on the floor a second later.
After pushing the white fabric to the side, Jisoo does nothing but moan as you ease yourself inside.
"Oh fuck."
You groan into her ear, relishing in the familiar feeling of being inside her tight cunt. Jisoo's cheek is pressed up against the white wood as she takes your pounding from behind. Her moans are deeper than they usually are. Maybe because you haven't fucked her in a while. Or because her parents and fiance are downstairs.
You kiss her other cheek and her naked shoulders as you thrust into her again and again. Her scent only makes you go harder. You hold her waist with both hands, pounding her against the door.
Jisoo's eyes are closed. You can't tell if it's because she is liking it so much, or because she is cheating. Either way, you keep using her body to make yourself cum. Her tight walls do most of the job. They squeeze around you, trying to make you cum as quick as possible.
Leaning against her, you fuck her into the door, slowly approaching your orgasm.
"Fuck Jisoo."
She knows what's coming next, moaning a little louder as she feels you throbbing inside of her.
That rush, coming from knowing you are using another man's woman as a free-use toy, pushes you over the edge. You claim Jisoo's pussy as yours as you paint her insides white. She feels your cum warm her lower region. While her fiance is probably begging her to sleep with him, you don't even bother asking where she would want your cum. You creampie Kim Jisoo, enjoying the familiar feeling of her cum filled pussy squeezing your cock.
Jisoo was never the loud type. Which is a blessing in disguise, especially when you use her in public. She barely talks, only moans and whines escape her mouth. It fits her reserved, proud character. Jisoo doesn't look very elegant or proud right now as you finally come to a hold. You bite into her ear, just above her earrings. As she flinches and hisses in pain, you only have time to think for barely a second. You wonder if she bought them, or her fiance did. They look beautiful on her.
When you open your eyes again, you see your teeth marks in her ear. Jisoo's forehead is now leaning against the wood. Her eyes are still closed, she is taking heavy breaths.
Resting your chin on her naked shoulder, you stay buried inside her snug hole.
"I have a meeting with your company tomorrow."
You kiss her neck, this time more careful not to leave a mark.
"Put your hair in a ponytail. I need something to hold onto. You don't want me to mess up your hair, do you?"
You step into her huge office after the first half of the long meeting is over. Jisoo surely did not disappoint.
Throughout the whole meeting, you were the only person aware of the fact that Jisoo is not wearing anything underneath that dress. She send you a picture this morning. She is only one button away from standing naked in front of you.
You walk around her desk, sitting down in her comfortable leather chair. Jisoo knows how the two of you will spend your lunch break.
#ask#kpop#kpop smut#kpop girls#kpop gg#male reader#blackpink#blackpink jisoo#blackpink smut#kim jisoo#bp jisoo#jisoo smut#jisoo#authorhjk1shorts
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I hate when you're away
Pairing: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader
Summary: Joel fucks the soreness away.
Warnings: +18 MDNI, smut smut smut ahead, unprotrected p-in-v, fingering, mentions of blowjob, cum eating, begging, horny asf Joel, eating out, daddy kink.
A/n: it's my first weekend with some time off, and what else should I be doing instead of trying my first attempt of writing smut hm hm?! Hehehe enjoy :) also, GIF ain't mine.
" Joel, baby! I'm so sore. " You whine softly as your fingers tenderly caress his tousled morning locks while he spreads warm, affectionate kisses all the way down your abdomen, tracing a path to his intended destination.
" Shhh, just relax now princess, let daddy stretch ya needy lil hole just a bit for his cock, will ya? " His thick accent sending shivers down your spine, leading you into closing your eyes, missing the way Joel spits in his fingers before smearing the sticky liquid all over your still puffy clit from last night's event, rubbing tight circles on the bud and dragging moisture up and down your pussy before shoving two dampened fingers inside you, curling his digits against your spongy walls, feeling you squeezing his fingers inside, your head falling back onto the mattress as you moans his name and bucks your hips against his palm.
Joel had spent a few weeks out due to one of his often travels around the state, doing god knows what with his most faithful partner, Tess. You used to be jealous of their proximity once you realized you had more than a crush on him, annoyed at how close she could casually be around him without making things up as an excuse to get his attention. Thankfully, the jealousy quickly went down the toilet once you found out she probably liked women more than himself did when she boldly hit on you while she was drunk, which you might even had enjoyed if you weren't so focused on seducing her partner.
You were reading a book on the living room's couch when you heard the jingle of keys unlocking you and Joel's shared apartment's door, your back sinking in an somehow uncomfortable position in the old cushions. You dropped your book aside, getting up to greet your man as he had spent long enough away from you, making you all needy for his presence and touch. To your dismay, instead of embracing you with his strong arms and whispering sweet nothings against your hair in attempt to show you how bad he had missed you, Joel didn't even look at you on his way in, dropping his seemingly weighty backpack on the floor, loud thud filling the air, before hurriedly barging in to the bathroom, not even bothering to close the door behind him.
You froze next to where he had just gotten in, not knowing how to react to his awfully unsual demeanor. As a matter of fact, you hadn't even had time to look in his eyes, only taking a hint of his beyond smudged clothes as he stormed away from you. Concern fill your chest as you begin to try to piece the puzzle on what had happened for him to act so distressed. Had the work he went to get done gone wrong? Was he pissed at someone who deared to go against him? You even wondered if Tess had gotten fucking killed by some motherfucking clicker. An assumption that soon vanished once you hear her voice on the other side of your door, talking to someone random on the hall.
Maybe he was just sick of you, afterward. Maybe he had gotten back to his strict and fuzzy way of treating you just like he was when you first got in his and his friend's way.
Unbestknown to you, the reason Joel had ignored your presence was due a fucked up wet dream he had had in the middle of the night when camping in the woods a few days earlier, leading him into waking up with a hard and leaking cock against the restrain of his pants, furious at how he wouldn't be able to take care of it when Tess was snoring right next to him and you were miles away. He tried to ease himself the best he could, struggling whenever he'd revivid the dream where he had you all on fours as he pounded you from behind, squirting on his cock as he demanded for you to cum, referring to him as daddy.
Well fuck, the way he missed your cunt the following travelling days should be forbidden.
The second Joel left his shower he went out looking for you, not bothering to wrap himself up in a towel much less get his body dried. You were sitting down, still in the living room, blankly staring at a random wall when he found you, a hint of regret hitting him when he realized that it was probably his fault you were so quiet but the incessant throb of his cock vanished the concern away. He approached you with loud steps, your eyes widening as you take in his naked form, droplets of water tracing paths behind him and all over his shaped body onto the floor below his feet, your eyes following his whole, parking at his pelvis where his cock was standing hard against his wet stomach, tip glistening with precum. Your mouth went dry as waves of shocks found their way up to the pitch of your stomach landing onto your core, it was safe to say the image of him only took mere seconds to affect you. Joel had his glare stuck on your face, his features harsh and eyebrows furrowed, almost as if he was in pain.
Joel knew that if he looked at you the moment he walked home, all sweet and loving with your big sparkly eyes staring at him, he wouldn't be able to keep his hands to himself as he was in a dreadful need of your mouth on him, but he couldn't give in before taking a long shower, there was no way you would even want to fuck with him smelling like shit. So instead, he chose to ignore you, which wasn't the smartest choice considering you probably would have nasty second thoughts on it, but he would make things up with you the sooner he was all clean and smeeling nice. And boy, did he do.
" Hi there, doll. Have you missed me?" you nodded, speechless. " Well then why don't ya kneel for daddy and show me how much ya missed him, huh? "
The following events were all a blur, your body probably working on auto pilot as it only took seconds before Joel had himself shoved deep down your throat, hands tugging tightly around your hair as he bobbed your head against him the harder he could, desperate to fill your throat with his thick ropes of cum in attempt to get rid of the burning feeling of his need. Which obviously, wasn't enough. After making you give him head he fucked you senseless on the floor, making sure to vividly manevour you in all of the positions he had dreamt of while traveling. You and Joel spent the following hours drowning yourselves in each other's desires until there was no hint of energy left for you to keep going.
That was until he woke you up the morning after, in your shared bed, spreading warm kisses all over your face and neck, engulfing himself into the warmth of your body and silently thanking the heavens for letting him return home safe to your embrace. No matter how much of you he had taken the previous night, his cock didn't seem to take any near satisfaction from it.
He keeps fingering you until the previous soreness you'd been feeling turned into a desperate buck of your hips, wishing for him not to stop, your cunt twitching and leaking as you feel yout orgasm approaching.
" Are you ready for me, doll? " Joel towers over your laying trembling body, bending his torso so he could grab your tits, assaulting your erect buds with harsh pinches. You moans, nodding quickly " Yeah? Then beg for it, wanna hear ya say it "
He knew you hated when he made you beg, annoyed at how easily he could work his way onto your brain and manipulate you into becoming nothing but a slutty whore for him. He knew you hated that you were so easy to succumb to him, not willing to stop once you had it started.
" Oh don't ya try to stop yourself from bein' my bitch now, doll. Your pussy's dying for my cock to get it all wretched " You whimper, your core burning for him.
" Please Joel, p-please... please fuck me! Come on, ugh, I need you inside me already "
Your pleads seem to ignite fire on him as he lowers his face next to yours and smirk hungrily, like a predator scolding his prey. Joel presses his lips against yours in a harsh motion, swallowing your moans. He keeps on clutching on your tits, his free hand lowers to grab his member, holding it against your now drenched cunt. He interrupts the kiss and gets back to kneeling in front of you on the bed, he positions his throbbing cock onto your entrance, bumping on it, eliciting a loud moan from you.
" Mhmm, such a naughty lil bitch for me, all whinin' and beggin', gonna fill you up so good hun' " All of his teasing was growing impatience in you, he hell knows how to drive you insane and would never skip the opportunity of seeing you squirming underneath him " Joel, will you shut the fuck up and fuck me already? For fuck sakes! "
" So much swearing for sucha pretty lil mouth, I think someone's growing mad at me now, huh " He mocked, causing you to growl in annoyance, but before you could complain any further Joel fully knocked himself inside you with no previous warning, thrusting his hips rapidly, both of his hands wrapped around your hips, pushing you desperately against him as his face contorted in pleasure. Your arms pull him against you making his torso bend over again, face falling onto the crook of your neck as you stick your nails into the flesh of his back, scratching and pulling him closer in a way that probably would draw blood from it, which only seemed to get Joel even more turned on as his cock would fuck you harder at each second.
" Yes, yes, yes, FUCK, fuck don't stop, don't stop baby! " Joel smirks, admiring your perky tits bouncing next to his face.
" Such a good girl begging for me. Fuck, ya pussy feels so tight, squeeze daddy's cock harder baby, c'mon " Joel mutters against your neck, his warm lips popping loud pecks and bites on it, you loved the way his beard would scrape your skin while he was fucking you.
" Mhmmm yes, want you cumming inside me daddy, I know you can't get enough of m-me, oh fuck! "
" Fuck, ya know me so damn well, don't ya? Daddy's gonna cum so hard, doll. Where do ya want me huh? " Joel pounds your pussy harder at each sentence, you know he's close from cumming, his hips muscles burning and twitching from how hard he's thrusting his way inside you, loud wet noises filling the air and sweat dripping down his naked back as you keep on scratching it raw.
" I-inside me daddy, mhmm ughh fuck please please fuck... gonna cum, fuck... I'm c-cumming Joel "
Joel tried his best to delay his release, to make the addicting feeling of your pussy swallowing him last the longer it could, but how could he ever control himself when his girl was begging so beautifully for him? How could he resist the thought of cumming so hard inside you that it would make you see stars and scream his name? Joel is addicted to you in ways he had never been with any other woman and his body would always betray him on it. He wouldn't miss the opportunity of bragging about making you cum when himself had jerked off so many times to the thought of it while he was still a mere friend of yours.
Joel growls, emptying himself inside you, cock twitching abruptly as white ropes of cum paint the tight walls of your cunt, your eyes rolling to the back of your head once you reach your own orgasm, jaw hanging open before eliciting a loud whine.
When you're both finished, Joel's body falls upon yours, panting and sweating, his cock softening within your warmth. He kisses your sternum, resting his eyes and listening to your heartbeat.
He pulls his cock out of your hole and you stops breathing for a moment when you feel his hot seed dripping down your pussy, you didn't know if it was the aftershocks of your climax but you could feel something gathering on your lower belly again. You shove one of your hands in between you and Joel's body, your fingers collecting his dripping cum and smearing it upon your swollen clit, making a mess all over it, dragging a low whimper from your throat, which caught your boyfriend's attention.
" Watcha doin' down there, doll? Seems like I'm not the only one who can't get satisfied, huh? "
" Mhmm, seems like it, yes "
" Here, lemme do the work for my woman "
Joel lowers his body all the way between your legs, nipping on your belly until he finds the spot you needed him so badly. You were still recovering from your previous orgasm but there was something about you being covered in his cum that wouldn't let your nerves cool down, you needed him just one more time.
He holds one of your legs and rest it above his shoulder, licking the insides of your thigh before stopping by your pussy, closing his eyes and inhaling your scent, his cock twitching for what it feels like the millionth time since he had gotten back, which almost seemed impossible but honestly, he couldn't care less about possibilities. Joel's jaw drops against your puffy core, his lips caressing your clit in a silent tease, he taste his own juices on you in a delicious mix of musky and sweet.
Lapping up your gathering moist, Joel licks and sucks on your pussy, pressing his tongue right where he knows you would die on the inside, you feel the coil building up again, tousling your fingers in his hair you pull him impossibility closer, bucking your hips on his skillful mouth, he alternates between shoving his tongue inside you and assaulting your clit with circling pressured motions. You feel as if you might explode at any time, wondering when he had learned to give head so fucking well, hints of jealousy hitting you when for a mere 2 seconds you imagine him making other women feel this way, getting interrupted by your orgasm ripping through your body.
If whenever Joel would return from a long trip he would make things up with you by giving you the pleasure of seeing him panting, face covered in your cum and a smirk on his lips after fucking you senseless for a whole night, then maybe it wouldn't be all bad having him away for a lil bit.
#joel miller x reader#joel miller#joel miller smut#joel miller fluff#the last of us#the last of us drabble#joel miller imagine#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x oc#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal imagine#tlou
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An Education in Malice — Part Four
Pairing: Vanserra!Reader x Azriel
Summary: With the sharp tongue of your notorious family, you are Azriel's most tantalizing challenge yet. It only takes one small meeting before you both realize that the line between hate and desire is dangerously thin.
Warnings: 18+ heavy making out and wandering hands, lots of bickering, sexual tension, threats, name calling, torture and wound descriptions, abuse, two emotionally dysregulated cunts tbh
Word Count: 7.7k
←Part Three
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
The air between you and Azriel had taken on a peculiar tension lately, some overwhelming, suffocating force that made you feel entirely too nervous for your comfort.
Neither of you could ever pinpoint who made the first move— or rather, neither of you were willing to admit who did— but somehow, like clockwork, your dress was hiked up, his leathers were undone, and he was rutting into you from behind. It was always the same: a possessive grip on your waist, in your hair, or on your breasts, breath hot against your ear as he whispered words that only fueled the fire between you, responses to whatever comments you had made to rile him up.
It had become a distraction, this strange dynamic you created, that even Renard's interrogations had taken a backseat in lieu of it. It was proving increasingly difficult to get work done between fighting or fucking.
The chamber was a dismal pit, darkness swallowing any hint of light that dared to enter. Moisture clung to the walls like a thick veil– the dirty, fetid atmosphere was tainted with the unmistakable stench of blood and other bodily fluids. You wrinkled your nose in disgust.
Azriel approached Renard, head cocking slightly to the side as his shadows danced around him— seemingly curious, excited almost. A twisted sense of satisfaction grew within you at the sight of Renard's pitiful state—starving, bloody, bruised, and desperate.
Perhaps you should have felt some semblance of remorse or pity; even with how cruel Renard was, a compassionate soul should still feel a sense of guilt, a sense of sickness. But as you searched your body for it, as you attempted to muster it up, you came up empty handed. Instead, a rush of power surged through you. It felt like karma– well deserved karma.
You glanced at Azriel. There seemed to be a mirrored expression of satisfaction on his face, an unphased coolness to the situation before him. Even his shadows seemed at home, falling into familiar, rehearsed positions as he moved. Deep down, something within you rested at the realization that he felt no remorse, either.
“Is your plan to just stare at him until he confesses his secrets?”
Azriel could already anticipate the scowl on your face from the tone of your voice alone. He slowly turned his head to toss an unamused glare your way, hazel eyes momentarily scanning your figure.
For the first time since this arrangement had begun, you were clad in something different, a departure from the usual dresses that adorned your form. The ensemble was a blend of regality and practicality, more akin to the attire of a warrior than a courtly lady— fitted pants and a tailored tunic, fabric adorned with subtle embellishments of autumn. It seemed as if Azriel wasn’t used to the sight yet— or he was entirely repulsed. You weren’t sure which, but you didn’t quite care, either.
When his eyes met yours again, you gave him an impatient eyebrow raise, nodding towards Renard’s limp body. “Are you done checking me out yet?”
Azriel’s stare remained on you for a few more moments before he followed your line of sight back to the male before him.
“Maybe if I didn’t have an incessant pest over my shoulder, I would be more successful.”
You stepped closer to him, a faint smell of night-chilled mist and cedar reaching your nose. “Maybe if you were actually good at anything besides harboring a grudge, you would’ve already been successful.”
Azriel didn’t move, didn’t so much as toss a glance your way as he responded, “Being a hypocrite isn’t a look fit for a lady.”
You let out an angry breath.
Too much time had passed with Renard missing. Soon enough, your father was bound to get suspicious— and Eris was bound to get worried as well. There wasn’t any doubt that Renard didn’t know much, not only because your father was a paranoid ruler, but because he failed to plan ahead more often than not. You didn’t need much information. All you needed was an idea of what Beron was planning, some inkling. Once you knew that, you could easily prevent it and ensure he didn’t gain any more power— ensure that Eris was set up to successfully overthrow him.
But Azriel seemed to be taking his time, attempting to get other information about your court that could prove useful for the Night Court.
“I think we’ve already established I’m past that title.”
Azriel looked at you. “Clearly.”
An all-too familiar simmering prickled at your skin and you clenched your jaw, matching the intensity of his glare with one of your own.
Renard let out a weak chuckle, blood staining his teeth as he lifted his chin.
“Listening to you two bicker is almost worse than the actual torture. You’re like a married couple. It’s pathetic.”
Azriel’s head snapped towards the male and a growl rumbled through the room. “Watch your mouth.”
But Renard only sneered, turning his bloodshot eyes to Azriel. “Big bad Shadowsinger, always lurking in the dark. Afraid to face your own inadequacies in the light, boy?”
Azriel’s eyes narrowed, tendrils of shadows now swirling around him, agitated, buzzing with a need to move. Renard offered a sickly, bloodied grin as he observed their movement. “No wonder you hide behind those shadows—they're the only things that can stand being around you.”
There was a pause as Azriel’s gaze grew predatory. And then a small, involuntary sound left your lips.
It surprised you as much as it did Azriel, who turned to look at you with a furrowed brow and growing scowl. Your eyes widened a fraction at the sound, and within seconds, you let out a laugh.
The softness of it felt sinful, felt completely and utterly wrong— and something rippled throughout Azriel’s body at it, dug its way deep down into him until his wings felt slightly limp. From around his arms, his shadows slowed, coming to a curious, awe-filled stop. They began whispering, but he paid no attention. He pushed the foreign sensations away, his surroundings registering in his mind as he scowled.
“What the hell are you laughing at?”
You shook your head, another laugh escaping your lips at his face, contorted in frustration— in an irritated confusion of being so caught off guard. His wings flared out, twitching slightly in response to the repeated sound. “Nothing,” you said, “Your life just may be more pathetic than I thought if you’re getting psychoanalyzed by the male you’re torturing.”
Azriel’s irritation deepened as a grin grew on your face. “Shut up.”
A weak scoff drew your attention back to the bound male next to you.
“You shouldn’t be laughing, princess.” Renard’s eyes gleamed with malice as he shifted his gaze to you. “Pretending to be tough, but the only reason you’re here is because you’re too weak to do anything on your own. Everyone knows Beron’s little girl is just a pathetic, needy bitch.”
The laughter died in your throat almost instantly, jaw clenching as your amusement quickly faded into a red haze of annoyance. A flame flickered at your fingertips.
“Careful,” you warned. You moved to take a step towards Renard, but Azriel’s hand shot out instantly, stopping you with a firm grasp around your arm.
You glanced down at where his hand met your body before pulling yourself away with a scowl. “Can you just do your job so we can kill him already?”
Your voice had a bitter, agitated edge to it now, a drawl that sounded more whiny than it did threatening. Azriel folded his arms, a gleam in his eyes as he responded with a mocking, “Why? Did he hit a nerve?”
You growled, watching as the edges of his lips turned up slightly— just enough for you to notice, just enough for that hint of an arrogant smirk to bother you.
“I think I preferred when you stayed quiet and sulked in your shadows.”
Azriel continued to stare at you, the ghost of a smirk still plastered on his face. A sense of annoyance prickled at your skin, mixed with something that tasted nauseatingly like embarrassment. Faintly, you felt the rush of heat threatening to spread to your cheeks.
You clenched your jaw harder, gaze flickering from Azriel’s amused face to Renard’s bruised, snickering one. You landed back on Azriel with a sneer.
“Wipe that stupid look off your face before I do it for you.”
Azriel watched in amusement as you stormed off, disappearing with another huff of annoyance and a vulgar gesture over your shoulder.
Renard turned to him with a vile grin. “I have to ask. What’s she like, Shadowsinger? We’ve all wanted to fuck her. I bet she’s just as desperate in bed as she is—”
Azriel's expression darkened instantly, shadows swirling violently around him as he flared his wings out, poised and deadly. He held Renard by the throat, grip unyielding, siphons glowing angrily. His voice was deadly calm as he muttered, "I warned you to watch your mouth."
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
Only a couple hours had passed when Azriel found you again in the Spring Court, standing in the small house he’d grown strangely accustomed to.
“You're here.”
You glanced over your shoulder, a sarcastic smile tugged at your lips. "Great detective skills on your part. Think you could use those with Renard?"
Unphased, Azriel rolled his eyes, the motion barely perceptible but unmistakable to someone who had spent as much time with him as you had. He moved with silent grace until he was standing right behind you, shadows hovering over his shoulders.
"What's all this?"
His tone was flat as he took in the various items you had strewn across the table.
You shrugged, not bothering to turn around. "I brought some things so I wouldn’t need to keep going back and forth."
You could feel his presence behind you, the warmth of his body caressing over your skin as he leaned closer. Azriel's gaze landed on a leather-bound notebook among your belongings.
"What's the notebook for?"
You stared at it for a moment, gingerly picking it up in your hands. There was a smirk on your lips as you turned to face him, face seemingly innocent and sweet.
"All my private thoughts and hopes and dreams. At night, I sit with it and write in cursive letters, 'I hope the shadowsinger shuts the fuck up and stops being nosy.'"
Your voice started light, teasing, but as you finished the sentence, your expression hardened into a glare. Azriel seemed anything but amused, and a muscle feathered in his cheek. He gave no verbal response, opting to keep his gaze trained on you until you let out a huff of annoyance.
He’d collected certain observations of you over the past few weeks.
You rolled your eyes in almost every conversation he held with you. You smelled like a crackling fire and forest pine branch, something so similar to fresh fall air. He’d seen you sneer more than he’d ever seen you smile— which was once, today, as Renard commented on his shadows and apparent self-loathing. But most of all, you hated prolonged eye-contact. It made you angry, frustrated— flustered even. Azriel wouldn’t deny the satisfaction he felt every time he watched your jaw clench, watched the tinge of pink appear on the apple of your cheeks.
“What?” You snapped, glaring at him through your lashes.
“Any particular reason you're more insufferable than usual?”
An eye roll. “Bite me.”
“Hmm.” A slow, dangerous smile curved his lips. “Do you want me to?”
Your mouth parted for a fleeting second. And then you scowled, nose scrunching at the movement. “I brought this to keep track of everything I find out about my father and Koschei.” You shoved the journal into Azriel’s chest with a little more force than necessary.
Azriel frowned, catching it effortlessly. His shadows flowed to his fingers, gliding across the cover as he flipped it open. He glanced at you through his lashes, a single brow arching in question. “This is empty.”
“Point proven,” you shot back, “Go back to Renard and find something useful. We’re running out of time.”
He stood up straight, rolled his shoulders back, and narrowed his eyes at you. “I wasn’t aware we were on a deadline.”
You chewed the inside of your cheek. Another sigh of annoyance left your lips. "Beron is bound to realize that Renard isn't on some drunken bender anymore. He's going to come looking. I don't want there to be anything for him to find."
Azriel's lips quirked in a small, humorless smile. "I think I'm capable of hiding a trail or two."
"Are you sure about that?" You narrowed your eyes. "Because you barely seem able to get Renard to do anything besides read you like a boring, sad, self-loathing book."
Azriel let out a scoff, glancing to the side as he threw the journal back onto the table behind you. You clenched your jaw at the movement, at the sound of the thud it created as it fell onto the wood.
"Your insults are getting weaker, princess. Maybe you should take some lessons from him."
"Shut up," you snapped, the words coming out more petulant than you'd intended.
He crossed his arms across his chest. Your eyes fell to his hands, to the siphons that beamed with color in front of you. His shadows followed the movement, gliding down his forearms and around his wrists.
“What would happen if Beron found out you were sneaking around? That you were holding Renard?”
His voice drew your attention back to his face, where his eyes were narrowed in on you in a deep, curious, almost unsure gaze.
Your answer was swift, no hesitation. “He would kill me.”
Azriel wasn’t quite sure why his body reacted the way it did, why he felt himself flinch, why his wings seemed to twitch in discomfort. Whatever the reason, you noticed the reaction immediately, noting how his brows seemed to furrow ever-so-slightly—- a motion nearly minuscule for the normal eye, but you were talented at picking up these things. Years of blending in gave you such abilities— and weeks around Azriel made it easier to read his tells.
There was a feeling in your stomach that you couldn’t make out yet, but it was heavy and made you antsy. You broke eye contact, dropping your eyes to the ground as you absentmindedly kicked your shoe at some tracked-in dirt.
“Don’t act so surprised,” you said nonchalantly, “My father has no ties to me beyond the unfortunate blood in my veins. I’m a bitch to be bred by the highest bidder.”
Something tightened in your chest as you paused for a moment. You blinked away the images that were flowing in through the corners of your mind. “I’m not worth any extra hassle.”
A silence followed. Your gaze was still on the ground, still on your black boots and the floor beneath you. A faint motion caught your eye and you watched as a tendril of Azriel’s shadow drifted to the ground— cascading down his ankle before it fell to the ground, stopping at your feet.
“I’d say,” Azriel murmured.
His words ran through you like a cold chill.
Azriel watched as something dark and fleeting passed through your eyes. You stood up straight, dropping your hands to grip the edges of the table as you leaned the small of your back against it. The faint smell of something burnt lingered in the air.
You tilted your head at him, gaze flickering between his eyes. And then a mocking, sly grin pulled at the edges of your lips. It felt unnatural. “Says the man who fucks me in the forest like a starved beast.”
Azriel’s hands slowly dropped from his chest. He took a step forward. A sense of tension crackled in the shared air, and you felt it within your stomach— a small flicker of fire.
“You let me.”
You shrugged. Heated pooled in your veins. “A good fuck is a good fuck.”
Azriel’s lips curled into a smirk, and his hand reached out to trace up your arm. You tightened your grip on the edge of the table as the touch traveled through your skin. “It doesn’t bother you that it’s me?”
There was something inherently dangerous about the way he spoke, about the taunting, accusatory tone his words now dripped with. He traced the movement of his hand with his eyes, continuing a path up your arm.
“I could ask you the same thing.”
His eyes flickered up to yours. You took a deep breath.
“Truthfully?” He leaned in closer. “I loathe it.”
His movements momentarily stilled, but you felt his shadows continue the path he’d started, felt as they slowly snaked up your arms.
“Yet you keep coming back.”
His eyes darkened, and then he let out a soft, cool hum. “A good fuck is a good fuck.”
By now, you were inches apart, the space between you a thin, taut with a suffocating tension that made it hard for you to breathe. His shadows slithered around you, caressing your skin so delicately you could’ve sworn it mimicked a lover's touch— their darkness wrapping around your neck, weaving themselves through strands of your hair.
You bit your lip, and Azriel's hand moved to your mouth, the pad of his thumb slowly pulling your bottom lip down. "You said you don’t care about Koschei,” he murmured, “That you just want to help your family.”
He released your lip, thumb resting on your skin as he held your chin in his hand. He titled your head to his line of sight. “But Eris doesn’t know about Renard.”
"No, he does not.”
Your voice was quieter now, a low, soft tone that made Azriel almost groan in response. The feeling went straight through his body, coiling in his stomach and making his cock twitch.
"Would he disagree with the methods?"
Azriel’s lips were inches from yours, the space between you practically nonexistent.
You frowned at the question, feeling your chest tighten as his mouth hovered near yours. Your knuckles turned white as your grip on the table turned iron, feeling the chipped wood beneath your fingertips.
"He would disagree with me interfering so boldly with my father.”
"Because it would get you killed," Azriel stated.
"Yes.”
His nose brushed against yours, and he met your gaze as his hand moved to wrap around the base of your neck.
"You’re willing to continue this even if it risks your life?"
You felt strangely exposed, naked in a way that you’d never felt before— not even when your clothes had been torn off and he was deep inside you, hands roaming your naked skin with a scorching touch and a ravenous mouth. This felt intimate. You didn’t like it.
You traced the features of his face, his gaze still laser-focused on you, intense and wanting. He had a few freckles across his cheeks that you’d never noticed, and the flecks of green in his eyes were overshadowed by his dilated pupils. You took a deep breath, finding the courage to meet his heavy gaze once more.
"Wouldn’t you do something similar?"
Azriel paused. A sense of conflict passed through his eyes as he pulled back slightly, just enough to scan your face entirely.
"No," he finally said. He hesitated for a moment. "I’d do the exact same thing."
There was a beat of silence. You stared at one another, breaths turning heavy, ragged. Your heart thundered beneath your ribs. Before you could come to your senses, you closed the distance between you, wrapping your hands around his neck to pull him into you. Azriel responded eagerly, mouth slotting over yours with a natural, practiced ease.
His hands fell from your neck, tracing down your waist until his palms gripped your hips, pulling your body further into his own. You let out a sound of pleasure at the feeling, at how his hands explored you, how the heat of his body seared against yours. You melted into his touch.
Azriel’s lips trailed along your jawline, and with a guttural groan, he suddenly spun you around, pulling you back against him with a possessive force, his arousal pressing hard into your beck.
The sudden change in position only fueled the haze in your mind and you placed your hands over his, following as he roamed over your curves. You threaded your fingers through his, roughly guiding his palm up your chest, moving to cup it over your breast.
His lips nipped at your ear from behind.
"This change in wardrobe is interesting," he murmured, voice husky and rough with a delicious sense of desire.
You tilted your head slightly, reveling in the feeling of his breath against your skin. "Don't like it?"
He chuckled lowly, his hands cupping your breast roughly. “Don't particularly favor how difficult it seems to take off."
The sensation of his touch sent a rush of heat coursing through you. Every inch of you burned with need— an all-consuming, humiliating need.
Your eyes fluttered shut and you leaned into his touch, head falling back onto his shoulders as his lips found the skin beneath your ear.
You raised a hand to tangle your fingers into Azriel’s hair, your eyes opening once more as his touch grew hungrier, rougher.
The view of the table slowly came into focus. Your gaze fell to the notebook, its empty pages seemed to mock you with their blankness, and you blinked as a sense of sanity washed through you like a cold tide.
With a jolt, you pushed yourself away from Azriel, prying his hands off your body as you broke the heated embrace.
Azriel blinked, shadows rushing back to him as if startled by the sudden pull away. His hair was tousled, lips still tingling from the kiss.
"What is it?" he asked, breathing heavy.
You took a moment to compose yourself, patting down your disheveled hair with quick hands. "I’m bored. This isn’t doing it for me," you lied. You swallowed as Azriel’s stared at you with a furrowed brow. "Just go work on Renard."
You left no room for him to respond. Within the blink of an eye, you had disappeared from Azriel’s sight.
His hands ran through his hair, attempting to shake off the lingering effects of the moment with you. The air still felt suffocating, still smelled of you and the sweet, addicting scent of your arousal. He scowled to himself.
His shadows slowly moved down his frame, falling to the ground and gliding across the floors. His eyes fell down to their movement, watching as they wrapped around a foot of the table, as they made their way up to the tabletop.
He squinted at where they landed, reaching a finger out to the area that they traced. There, etched into the wood, was a faint outline of a burnt handprint— a perfect replica of your palm.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
Even with the familiar scene of pine and earth, returning home to the Forest House– to your court— never brought you a sense of comfort. But today, with the heat of your blush still spreading through your cheeks, you welcomed the quiet, empty halls.
The soft patter of paws drew your attention as Laney approached with her head lowered. A small smile grew on your lips as she nudged you with her wet nose, but quickly the smile dropped as a small whine escaped her.
Kneeling down, you gently ran your fingers across her coat. "What's wrong, girl?"
She only nudged your hand once more and turned, leading you deeper into the house.
A sense of foreboding settled over you as you followed her through the corridors. Your steps quickened when you spotted Flint lying outside Eris’s room. The dread in your chest grew heavier. Eris had a special connection to Flint. There were only a few situations in which he’d refuse the company.
Your face fell as you pushed the door to Eris’s room, heart clenched at the sight before you.
Eris sat on a small, velvet bench at the end of his bed, his head snapping back to the sound of his door opening. His expression quickly softened when he met your eyes, and you watched as his shoulders slumped. “It’s just you.”
You gave him a small nod as he turned back around, your gaze falling to the blood-soaked shirt he wore, the crimson color spreading throughout the thin fabric. Flint and Laney pushed past you, paws pattering on the ground as they entered the room. A heavy feeling settled in your chest, something entirely dark and queasy.
Eris grumbled as Flint neared him. “Shit. Y/N, close the godsdamn door.”
“I-” You snapped out of your daze, quickly closing the door before rushing over to him, gently pushing the hounds aside. “I’m sorry.”
You sat down next to him. “They just want to help you,” you said quietly.
Eris sighed, a deep, weary sound. “I know. I just—”
Your eyes wandered to the hounds who had settled down nearby. Such regal, cunning, smart creatures. You’d never think them caring enough to sense such pain, yet here they were, eyes reflecting a deep understanding of the situation. Flint let out a small whimper, laying his head on his paws.
You looked back at Eris, slumped with his head in his hands, spine curved in a manner that made his wounds pour deeper into his shirt. A similar thought made its way through your mind. Your brother, regal and intelligent, a male who carried so much, who bore his father’s wrath time and time again– a male with a warm heart somewhere deep within the anger he radiated. The heavy feeling in your chest grew, began to fester into something fighting between fury, loathing, and suffocating sadness.
“What happened?”
Eris didn’t lift his head, voice muffled by his hands. “He found me talking to my men. It wasn’t anything. Wasn’t about Koschei, wasn’t even about him.”
There was an exhaustion in his voice that dripped with every word.
“He was feeling particularly upset today,” Eris finished as he lifted his shirt, revealing the full extent of the damage. The lashes were deep, and you could see the dark, almost blackened edges where your father’s special concoction had seeped into the wounds. Eris bit back a groan, jaw clenched tightly.
That heavy feeling in your chest turned hot, burning— all consuming. So many things ran through your mind, overwhelming, crushing floods of emotions drowning your senses.
You registered the anger first, the empty, crushing pressure of it, a feeling you’d grown too familiar with. Anger at your father, at the situation you were all trapped in, at the sheer unfairness of it all.
And then it was guilt. Dark, suffocating, guilt. Renard missing had probably put your father on edge. Not only had you lied about it, kept it a secret, but you hadn’t been there when Eris needed you most. Instead, you’d been entangled with Azriel, a male who had no respect for you, for your family, who would so willingly watch your brother suffer. Selfish, selfish, selfish.
You opened your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. There was nothing you could say, nothing that would make this situation okay, that would take away Eris’s pain– that would prevent it from happening all over again. You swallowed.
“Eris-”
He lifted his head and turned to you a resigned expression, eyes slightly wide with desperation. "I’m going to call it all off. We can’t meet with them now, not for a while.”
You didn’t need to ask for clarification, you already knew who he was talking about, what alliance he was referring to. You shook your head. “No, we need-”
"It’s too dangerous," he interrupted, voice urgent and pleading. "He’s watching everyone more closely now. If he finds out you're involved, I don't know what he'll do."
You shook your head faster, a hard sense of determination flaring in your chest. "We can’t, I can't. I need to figure something out. I need to help you."
Eris sat up straighter, grimacing at the motion as he reached out, his hand finding a firm but gentle on your wrist. "You need to stay safe, Y/N. Please. Nothing else matters."
You looked at him, brows furrowed and throat tight. Your strong, protective brother now reduced to pleading with you. You took a deep, ragged breath. “It all matters. I need to help you, okay? I need to make sure you have the upper hand."
Eris just shook his head, shook it so firmly and desperately that you could’ve sworn he was a teenager again, hand on yours as he scolded you for breaking something.
"Please," he repeated, his voice breaking. “Just listen to me."
A wave of helplessness washed over you, and now you felt small again, felt as if you’d shrunk in place. Your mind traveled back, throwing you into memories where you’d hide away from your father, fearing his disappointed hand, desperate for approval but receiving only pain. The same feeling bubbled in your chest.
You swallowed hard. "I can't just stand by and do nothing."
Eris's eyes softened. "You want to help me? Stay safe.”
You frowned, biting the inside of your cheek. The words you wanted to say caught in your throat. You couldn’t promise him that. You couldn’t lie. So instead, you turned your attention to his back, to the angry wounds that marred his skin.
"Here, let me help you," you murmured. He gave you a long look, then nodded, slowly moving his body to expose more of his back to you.
You moved your hand to his back. Heat surged through you, flickering at your fingertips. Your hands shook, trembled as you attempted to focus. You tried to channel it, to control that divine fire within you, but the energy was wild and unsteady. A self-loathing bite gnawed at you.
"I can't—" you whispered, the words laced with frustration.
Renard’s's taunting voice echoed in your mind. Too weak to do anything on your own.
Eris turned to look at you again, calm words breaking through the rising storm you felt inside your chest. "It's okay,” he said, “I can do it."
"I'm sorry.”
He shook his head at you, a small smile gracing his features. “There's nothing to be sorry for.”
There was something about the fact that he was able to smile, that he pulled such a gesture out for you, that made the bitter loathing inside of you spread even faster.
"Just stay with me?” Eris asked.
“Yeah,” you breathed. “Of course.”
With one hand, he held yours, and the other twisted over his back. You watched as his own hands began to heat up, glowing with a controlled, steady flame.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
All you felt was anger. All you saw was red.
Memories flashed in your mind, one after another. Eris’s bloodied wounds and the far-off look in his eyes, your mother hid away from the world and the echoes of her crying, being forced to clean the floors of your brother’s blood, your paralyzing inadequacies. It all twisted inside you, each image wrapping itself around your ribs, wounding itself tight enough to make you struggle to breathe.
You weren’t sure how you got here, but the smell of blood in the air tasted sweet on your tongue. Renard lay slumped in the metal chair. Despite his appearance, a mocking grin spread across his split lips as you entered.
“Come back for more, have you?”
The sight of him, significantly more battered than the last time you’d seen him, brought a welcomed sense of satisfaction. At your sides, you clenched your fists until they were white.
“I’m done playing,” you said, your voice a low, dangerous growl. “Tell me what you know.”
Renard’s grin widened, a cruel glint in his eyes. “I'm trembling in fear,” he mocked, “What's a dolled-up whore like you going to do?”
Something inside you snapped.
With a snarl, you lunged forward, hands slamming down onto the metal chair. All the anger, all the pain, everything you’d been holding back, surged through you. The metal beneath your palms began to heat up, the sensation almost soothing in its intensity— cathartic, even.
Renard’s eyes widened. “I already told you both, fuck, I already gave you all I know!” he shouted, painful groans leaving his mouth as the hot metal below him began to bite at his exposed skin. “We don’t know anything.”
“You’re a liar!”
In the back of your mind, you grasped at your resolve, grasped at the strength you needed to keep your desperation hidden— all attempts proved futile. You grabbed Renard’s neck, fingers digging into his flesh as a simmering heat radiated down your arm. “Tell me what you know!”
Renard’s screams filled the room, his body writhing in agony. “I don’t—” he choked out, voice hoarse with pain. You stared at your hand, stared at the flicker of flames that began had to grow, watched as they moved to Renard’s skin–
But before the flames could fully spread, black smoke enveloped your wrist, wrapping around it with a smothering, extinguishing touch.
Not smoke—shadows.
A hand grabbed you next, pulling you back with a rough hand.
You pulled against the familiar grip. “Let me go, you foul-bred animal!”
Azriel’s voice was a low growl in your ear. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
You struggled against him, but his hold was firm.
Within a blink, you were winnowed to an open area in the forest, the sudden transition leaving your senses reeling. A cool breeze brushed against your skin, carrying the scent of pine and damp earth. You blinked. And then you pushed Azriel off, staggering back with the force of the motion. Your heart pounded with residual fury, a trickling sense of adrenaline still coursing through your veins.
“What do you not understand about 'let me go'?” you spat, “Is there something in those bat genetics of yours that makes you lose brain functioning at random intervals?”
Azriel’s didn’t budge. “Do not go back there.”
“You don’t tell me what to do, Shadowsinger. I think it’s time I handle this on my own.”
“Handle it?” he echoed, his shadows curled at his fists. “You were about to burn him alive, losing control like some child throwing a tantrum.”
The color drained from your face. “And you’re the expert voice on self-control?” The taste of resentment lingered on your tongue, sour and sickly familiar. “Where was this energy when you slaughtered and tortured my brother’s men? When they were being controlled, when they knew nothing?”
Azriel’s wings twitched almost imperceptibly. Your voice fell slightly to a tone lower, more raw.
“Was what I was doing truly that bad, or do you only care that it’s me doing it?”
There was a beat. Azriel looked away before finding your eyes again. He shook his head, a small scowl on his face. “What are you implying?”
Something inside you shifted as you stared at him, every detail seemingly magnified, as if your emotions had sharpened your perception at last. You’d noticed this intensity around him, wrote it off as the thrill of an adversary. But you realized now, as Azriel stood before you, that he was something else entirely: a stark embodiment of everything you loathed, everything you sought to avoid, and everything you secretly craved.
He wielded cruelty with impunity, praised for his ruthlessness, while his family basked in the warmth of love and freedom, despite their own moral shortcomings. And now he stood before you, a bastard-born nobody who had stumbled into luck, blind to anything beyond his own skewed perceptions.
There was a defiant, knowing glint in your eyes, as if something had been confirmed— as if that you'd found the answer to some question you’d asked for centuries.
“You are so desperately searching for some confirmation that I am as horrible as you’ve made me out to be.”
Azriel's eyes narrowed slightly. His demeanor remained outwardly composed, a practiced facade of stoicism and indifference, but the glow of his siphons gave him away.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
You raised an eyebrow, fists slowly unfurling at your sides. Your breath was more even now.
“I understand more than you think. You’ve been waiting for me to slip, to prove that I’m just like—”
“Beron.”
You paused, slighting flinching at how much contempt was fit into one word.
Eris. You were going to say Eris. Not Beron. Not your father.
A flash of hurt crossed your face and something in Azriel’s chest tightened. His shadows fell into a frozen wreath around his arms.
“Right,” you scoffed, moving to brush past him. “Then I better do a good job and prove you right.”
Azriel stopped you with a casual sidestep, wings flaring out to block your path further. “Do not go back there.”
“I will do whatever the hell I please,” you hissed, meeting his gaze defiantly. There was a burning hatred in your eyes that he’d never felt before, something more foul and rotten than what had been there before.
Azriel’s jaw clenched even further as he let out an angry breath. The strength of your gaze alone triggered his hand to instinctively wander to the dagger on his hip, to the cool steel of Truth-Teller. His shadows curled around his fingers, threading through them as if calling him back to reality. He blinked, and then pulled his hand away, flexing it as he looked at you once more.
“Why?”
Azriel's voice was probing, his gaze searching— scanning your face with a scrutiny that made you itch.
“Why what?” you snapped back, your tone sharper than you intended, the itch spreading, making you want to pace or scream, anything to shake off his intense stare, to rid yourself of the tightening in your chest.
“You’re desperate. This wasn’t as thought out as you tend to be.”
You let out a dry, humorless laugh, feeling the sound scrape against your throat. "Because you know me so well?" The words felt like ash on your tongue, a bitter taste lingering in your mouth.
“Yes,” he stated simply, his eyes piercing into yours still. “We’re allies. Explain yourself.”
"I was just trying to pick up your slack and get information." The lie rolled off your tongue naturally.
But Azriel wasn’t buying it. "No, that’s not it," he countered, "We’re working for the same side. There is no reason for you to go off like this."
You gritted your teeth, the pressure making your jaw ache. “We are not working for the same side.”
“We have an alliance.”
His calm demeanor only fueled your frustration. Your hands fell into a familiar position at your side, curled into tight fists, your nails biting into your palms.
“Your alliance with Eris is to support him when he takes over the throne. But when it comes to Koschei, there is no doubt in my mind you’re willing to undermine your allies to get rid of his threat. And in doing so, you’ll endanger me and my family.”
Your voice was rising, the words spilling out in a rush of pent-up emotion. “ I want to— I need to know everything before any moves are made. My brother needs an edge to stay ahead, and he sure as hell isn’t going to get it if he’s playing by the rules and having to defend his every move because of this stupid agreement.”
Azriel’s jaw tightened, his eyes darkening to near black. “Eris wouldn’t need to defend himself if he wasn’t a vile snake.”
Rage boiled through you, its fiery grip yanking onto your stomach and your chest.The intensity of it casted a hazy glow, distorting your vision with its searing heat.
“I am fed up with your little group thinking that we need to beg for your forgiveness. Tell me, does it get cold on all of that moral high ground? Does the high horse ever get uncomfortable?”
You stepped closer to him, pushing against his chest with your finger, the contact sending a jolt up your arm. Azriel's hand shot out, gripping your wrist tightly.
"Perhaps Eris feels the need to beg for forgiveness because of the acts he’s committed.”
“And what has he done? Besides refusing to give in to every whim?”
You tried to yank your hand free, but his grip held firm. Your pulse pounded in your temples, a steady, throbbing beat. You felt that familiar prickling feeling grow across your skin, a simmering fire creeping up your arm.
“He left Morrigan in those woods to die.”
He dropped your hand, the action almost dismissive, as if he couldn’t bear to touch you anymore. You pulled it back into you and took a step back, shaking your head. Of course. The thought echoed in your mind, bringing a bitter realization that settled like a stone in your stomach.
“It always comes back to that, doesn’t it?”
Azriel’s expression hardened, centuries of a grudge etched into every line of his face. His shadows danced around him, dark tendrils coiling and writhing like live fire across his body. You felt it radiating off him in waves— a palpable hatred that made your skin prickle. It was a feeling so intense you wondered how he had managed to lessen it before, how he could bear to be inside you, even with you turned away.
“My brother didn’t put that nail in her. He didn’t touch her at all.”
Azriel’s eyes were hard as steel. “He left her there. Naked, scared, and dying.”
“He gave Morrigan mercy in the only way he knew how.”
“You call that mercy?”
“Yes! Eris was just as much of a child as Morrigan was.”
Every word felt rancid now, burned like bile in your throat, fueled by a protectiveness born from years of standing by your brother's side. You stepped closer to Azriel, not bothering to hold back the flames that now licked at your skin. His shadows coiled around his arms, formed an almost protective barrier around his clenched fists.
“Do you know what my father would have done had Eris touched her, helped her at all? He didn’t take lightly to the disrespect and humiliation she passed. He would have made a public show and slaughtered her. Just as he later did with Jesminda.”
Azriel stayed quiet, stayed eerily still as he watched you. You didn’t expect a response. A new emotion curled itself into your gut, something much heavier than anger, than rage. You thought about Eris, thought about the lashes on his back, thought about how he used to stay awake at night to wander the halls, listening outside of your parent’s chambers in case your mother needed help. You thought about how he’d helped you bury Jesminda, how he’d kept a figurine of Lucien’s to give to you.
No matter what he did, or what you did for him, he would never be free— not truly. Not from his past and the assumptions people have made of him. He would always be cruel. And you, in association, would always be evil. Vile. It was in your family's nature. You felt foolish for thinking otherwise, for not learning how to take your rage and make it something useful, forge it into a weapon, train it like a beast to eat the remaining shreds of your empathy.
Eris deserved better. He was better than Rhysand. He was better than the male that stood before you.
"But none of this matters to you," you continued, your voice tinged with bitterness and resignation. "Even if it's the truth.”
Azriel’s wings twitched. You didn’t need further confirmation that your words held true. He would never accept a version of that night besides his own, because a version that included the truth would force him to see Eris as something other than a wicked, evil male. As long as your brother was worse than Azriel, as long as there was someone worse than him, he’d never have to face the fact that he wasn’t as good of a male as he claimed to be.
"You make excuses for your brother, but where are yours?" Azriel finally spoke. "You've done cruel things. You've hurt people. Killed people." His gaze flickered to your fists wreathed in flames. "Burned them alive," he added.
The fire at your arms grew in response to his words. You cocked your head. And then you ignored him. "You threatened my life. At that High Lord’s meeting— you lost control, put my brother in a chokehold, and threatened my life."
Azriel's nostrils flared and his siphons began to shine with a dangerous, angry glow.
"I dare you to live up to your word, Shadowsinger," you challenged, taking a slow step towards him. "I'm here. I've been here.”
His eyes traced your every movement.
“And yet, you've just fucked me."
There was a flicker of something in his eyes, a mix of anger and shame that he quickly masked behind a veil of indifference. But you saw it, felt it, reveled in it.
"You're weak, Azriel," you said, voice low and calm. "A slave to your anger, to your impulses, to your High Lord. You have always been weak."
He blinked at the sound of his name falling from your lips, a wave of uncertainty washing through his face. But his eyes stayed on you, still burning, still angry. They simmered hotter now, heavier with a new strain of contempt.
Your breath escaped in a half-hearted chuckle. "It's a pity," you said, shaking your head slightly. Your flame dwindled to a faint firefly glow. "To see such a pretty face marred by blind devotion."
With one final glance, you turned on your heel and winnowed away. You didn’t see Azriel again for two more weeks.
✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹
←Part Three
guys.... the next part is one of my favorites tehehehe cause its mainly just azriels perspective and where his mind is at. PLUS this is where those content warnings start to get lighter :DDDD
permanent tag list 🫶🏻: @rhysandorian @itsswritten @milswrites @lilah-asteria @georgiadixon
@glam-targaryen @cheneyq @darkbloodsly @pit-and-the-pen
azriel tag list: @thisiskaylin @serrendiipty
#azriel x reader#azriel#azriel x you#azriel x y/n#azriel x reader angst#azriel fanfic#azriel fanfiction#azriel shadowsinger#azriel spymaster#azriel acotar#acotar fanfic#azriel angst#a court of thorns and roses#acotar fanfiction#acotar#acotar x reader#malice series
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What if MC was sent to an alternate dimension somehow and that dimension contained all 7 overblots who woke up there after they were defeated in main story. How would they react to the magicless prefect who managed to defeat them suddenly showing up out of nowhere?
Overblot Universe | Yandere Twisted Wonderland
Imagine a trip through the mirror portal gone wrong
Ending up in this other place where it looks like an ink covered version of Night Raven
Reminding you of your dear friends’ overblots
You hesitate to call out for help of any kind
Instead your greeted immediately by an army of ink blotted students marching towards you quickly
A single soldier steps to the front bearing a gaudy but familiar collar
“The Queen of Hearts demands you return to his side at once!”
Before you can say anything, another voice rings out
“Our Sultan demands the magicless one.”
This one has a smaller group but they are much more heavily armed
It leads to a brawl which you are uncomfortably at the center of
Escaping from the warring factions as you make your way to the school’s mirror room
Barely able to step on the premises you’re stopped by a small patch of sand sucking you into the ground
The only one you can think that’d use this is–
“Thought I smelled a troublesome herbivore.”
It’s Leona in all his overblotted glory
Snickering with a fanged smile he grabs you by the arm
Easily yanking you out of the sand and holding you against his chest
Still standing of the quicksand you hold on tight
You’re surprised when he almost lovingly rubs his cheeks against your own trailing down your neck with his nose
Then without warning he takes a deep bit into the crook of your neck
Only holding you still as you try to shove him away
When he pulls back with blood on his smile, you can only look at him betray
“What you think I’d be gentle after you chased me away? Not this time sweet heart.”
He tosses you over his shoulder as he walks further away from the building you want to go
Taking you to an inky territory that looks as though Savvannaclaw turned into some rocky mound in the dessert
With too much ease he tosses you into a scratchy pile of sand
He plops down practically on top of you
“Ow! This is really uncomfy how do you sleep on this?!”
“Don’t whine. Now that you’re here it’ll be a lot softer.”
Too fast and so familiar to your Leona he falls asleep
Anytime you move a centimeter the sand whips angrily around keeping you in his vicinity
But it seems the only time it didn’t react was when a drone with a bucket of water dunked on the sand rising to swat at it
The damp sand could only bubble slowly as the drone came closer to you shooting some small metal thing on your reaching hand
“NO!--”
The ugly snarl from the overblotted Leona dissipates as a flash of blue and black transports you someplace else
“There they are brother! You’re player 2! I told you they’d be here for the special day!”
You want to voice your confusion as you blink your blurry sight into something sharp
But somethings over your mouth
And your hands and your legs
Looking around you are in what looks like a cave lined with wires and technology baring an uncanny resemblance to a friend of yours
“You were right all along brother! Let’s prepare for the final act!”
It’s an overblotted Idia taking a heavy looking crown from the claws of some nearby machinery
Stopping to admire you his cold clawed hands run along your face as if checking if your real
Before placing the crown on your head
The minute the device is settled how he likes it tightens on your head
Bringing a numbing pain to the sides of your skull as you desperately try to wiggle free
Nothing you do stops the inky creation that looks like Ortho manipulate your binds to stand you upright
Bringing you to an alter, it’s there you notice the swirling abyss just pass the electronic officiant
“Now say your vows, my fruit.”
“Of course my precious future husband, master of the underworld and overworld. For years–”
It’s your voice but not
With a tinge of automation your voice chimes happily from the restraint over your mouth
At your not–real—vows Idia seems to giggle causing the abyss to widen and the suction intensify
Eventually ‘your vows’ end and Idia claims he’s going to skip
Letting his robotic officiant carry through like a typical ceremony
Until it gets to that part
“I’d be wrong not to speak my piece when both parties so clearly have withstanding debts with me.”
Part 2
#yandere x reader#yandere x you#lovelyyandereaddictionpoint#yanderexrea#yandere#yanderes#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twst#yandere twst x reader#yandere idia x reader#yandere idia shroud#yandere leona kingscholar#yandere leona x reader#yandere leona kingscholar x reader#yandere idia shroud x reader#yandere riddle rosehearts x reader#yandere riddle rosehearts#yandere riddle x reader#yandere jamil viper#yandere jamil x reader#Part 2? Maybe?
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hidden.
Feyd x WoC Reader (can be read by anyone tho)
you and Feyd have this thing and it can never be more.
warnings: Feyd bc let’s be real, smut, a little degradation, breeding kink
note: I love feyd, don’t know if I did him justice at all BUT the need to write him just won’t leave me be. I have a few others in the works so let’s see how it goes. Also no proofread, it’s late and I’m horny so yea.
No description of ethnicity but reader when I write is always written with myself in mind. It’s soooo self indulgent.
if you like it, love it, fuck with it leave some love. I DO NOT give permission for my shit to be used anywhere by anyone.
x
x
You know you shouldn’t be doing this but you just can’t help yourself. In all honesty how could you be expected to control yourself and behave like a lady of a great house when HE exists, when he was fucking you completely stupid against this cold wall in a darken slightly hidden hallway in the fortress.
You were extremely thankful this meeting of the great houses was taking place on Giedi Prime because not a living soul on this planet would dare speak of seeing the sight that the two of you made. Completely lost in each other, your legs wrapped tightly around his waist as he fucked into you with a desperate need, his muscular ass on display, your face full of pleasure as he bite love marks into your chest where your breast were fully exposed - because he knows there’s less chance of anyone seeing and he only even thinks of that for you and your honor - His plump lips pulling a nipple into his soft wet mouth to suck making you cry out.
Even your handmaids could be sent away and wait where they wouldn’t be spotted without you because he could do so on his own home planet though he probably could manage it on any planet he was that feared. You were lucky enough to sway your father to let you bring the only two you knew you could trust.
You could hardly keep your thoughts together when a particularly hard slow thrust made you scream out. You knew you were caught letting your mind wonder.
He tsked against your ear, his blacken teeth nipping the lobe before his tongue flicked it.
“Am I boring you my lady?” His deep raspy voice questioned in the deathly quiet hallway.
“No my love, know s-sometimes can’t help it” You answered breathlessly as you pulled your head back, your hand cradling his cheek as your eyes finally found each others.
Sometimes you got too caught in your thoughts and worries about being found, something he didn’t like. He was the kind of man that didn’t like anything to take your attention away from him and with the limited time your both able to find to be together he demanded you were fully present with him at all times and if not he’d have to bring that pretty little mind of yours back to the situation at hand.
He smirked, it was then you realized he had pulled out. The empty feeling sitting in.
“Then let me help you”
Before you could respond his thick long cock was pushing past your sensitive lips and burying its self deep within you to the hilt. You choked on your own scream as his pelvis pulled back and snapped forward with another hard thrust. You felt every veiny inch of him within your slick tight walls.
“Oh fuck” you moaned eyes rolling back as he continued his short brutal thrusts “oh Feyd, please”.
“Please what?” His deep voice mocked.
“Please, please wanna cum” you mumbled hardly getting the words out as your head fell backwards into the wall.
“Would you let me fuck you like this in front of all of them? In front of him?” He mocked some more, the “him” carrying the hatred you knew he had for the man he viewed as weak that your father had promised you to.
“Oh god yes! ‘M all yours!” You yelled desperately, pinned to the wall like decor, a fine piece of art as he drove his cock into you at that tortuous pace. It was hard, slow and deep.
His large rough callous hands which were somehow still soft held your bare ass under your dress to keep you in place as he fucked you. His fingers tips gripped you so tight you were sure there would be bruising.
“Let him see how wet I make you? How my pretty girl screams for me? Begging for my cock?” He rasped as his eyes bore into yours, your faces were so close at this point your sure you both were just breathing in eachothers breaths.
Your tight walls clenched even harder on his throbbing cock causing him to falter slightly, his hips needing a split second to get back into rhythm.
“Fuck!” He roared in that unique tone of his, “Look at you getting wet like a whore” he spat at you, though there was no malice.
“Getting fucking wet when I talk about fucking you in front of him, is that what you want? Want him and the whole known universe to know that you belong to me? That you belong to na-Baron Feyd Rutha Harkonnen? Know how well you take my cock?” He gritted, the look of pure possessiveness in his blue eyes as his nostrils flared, his full bottom lip being pulled between his teeth.
You couldn’t help the tears that sprung, and your nails that dug into his back no doubt breaking skin, you heard the hiss pass through his lips at the pleasure of it but he was just fucking you so good, splitting you wide open on his cock and saying the most nastiness things a lady of a great house should never hear. He was speaking to you a way no one would ever dare and it was driving crazy you like he knows it always does.
“Y-yes! Wan’ them all to know!” You moaned as your shaky breath washed over his full lips. You closed the small space and took his mouth upon yours, his opening immediately to take dominance over your tongue. The kiss was just as messy and sloppy as the fucking currently happening in a hallway anyone could walk down. Yet you couldn’t care less because of the pure ecstasy he was making you feel and because you knew Feyd would kill anyone stupid enough to walk this way, let along gaze upon you in this state.
The rest of the world may have not knew but those here did and they knew better than to ever speak on it.
Here they all know you belong to Feyd and that made your heart soar because you’d give anything for all to know.
“Fuck pretty girl” he groaned against your wet mouth, “You’re dripping down my balls, my fucking thighs are wet with you”.
His words just made you moan louder.
“Go head, cum for me, let go my pretty little pet” he rasped.
The scream that tore through you should make you embarrassed how much you sounded like a common whore but nothing in you could muster a care in the world. Feyd was worth everything. Worth getting caught, worth the embarrassment on your family, worth whatever came with being found out.
Your body shook as the force of your orgasm pushed Feyd’s cock out, momentarily catching him off guard before the loss of your heat and your desperate whine at the action caused him to snap back in action and drive his cock back in til he was brushing your cervix.
Your body continued to shake as your pussy claimed his cock in a vice grip and your eyes rolled back, your mouth hanging open with some slight drool down the corner. Everything about the moment sent a chill down Feyd’s spine as his balls drew tight and his cock swelled, the release of his cum shooting into your warmth and drenching your walls with his thick seed.
How Feyd wished more then anything you both could allowed it to take, the thought of you claimed in that way, round with his child caused Feyd release to prolong. A groan ripping through his chest, as his cock continued to spurt his cum into your warm haven. Desperate to see you round, full of him.
“Fuck!”
Your hands guided his head as you brought him in for an embrace. Your faces pressed together.
The both of you stayed that way for awhile. Deep breathing slowly coming to a normal pace as the mixture from both your releases cooled on each of your thighs.
He slowly pulled out his soften cock as you verbally mourned the loss.
Feyd helped you fix yourself before slipping his cock back into his pants and pulling them back over his hips. He hadn’t pull them down far to begin with with the rush you both were in. Just enough to get his impressive cock out.
“Did you mean it?” He asked catching you off guard with the softness and vulnerability of his deep raspy tone.
You searched his handsome face looking for an answer before it hit you. You fought back the tears that threaten to fall. The sadness that washed over you you wished wasn’t the reality.
“Of course, more than anything but we both know it would never happen Feyd. I am already betrothed” you remind him. “My father will not reconsider, not while house Fenring has offered so much and he still carry’s hatred for the Baron”.
Feyd didn’t seem surprised at your statement, it was the truth you both knew. He just seemed to be contemplating and that worried you. You didn’t want him to do anything that would get himself into trouble.
x
It was two long days later when you got to see Feyd again, this time in the arena. You don’t understand how it all happened because it had happened so quickly.
You were sitting up in the guest seats watching with a few the other young lady’s of great houses, gossiping about Feyds skill and brutality with the rest of your respective families when Feyd had just finished his slaughter. He stood there proud after taking off his shield and finishing in an even more entertaining way when all realized some of the slaves weren’t drugged.
He raised a single fist as the roar from the area slowly came to a stop. A servant rushed to him handing over something. You sat watching with all wondering what was happening since this wasn’t customary for the end of the fight.
“What is the na-Baron up to?” One of the lords from the other houses asked as everyone watched.
Your heart raced as you watched through your glasses as he brought a mic up to his mouth. He smirked before announcing his challenge to the young lord of house Fenring for your hand in marriage.
You could swear he looked directly up at you high in the sky above him smirking before he cut his palm, made a fist and pounded his chest in a salute of ultimate respect. The stunned crowed of Giedi Prime following their beloved na-Baron. The sound was deafening. Your breathing stopped as you heard all the gasps around you. The young lady’s grasping at you asking a million questions as your father and Lord Fenring jumped to their feet yelling their rage at the disrespect of the young na-Baron. For they understood things were different here and just like the na-Baron was currently explaining on Giedi Prime his challenge must be accepted by the young lord himself and he would not be able to choose a fighter instead where the laws of marriage was considered. It was fight to the death or be shamed and seen as weak. Which on Giedi Prime was seen as the worst fate. To refuse meant House Harkkonen would refuse to acknowledge House Fenring because of their weakness. All deals and trade voided.
You couldn’t slow your breathing as you leaned on the railing watching him watching you. You could hear the commotion around you and the young lord Fenring fighting with his father over his acceptance before making his way out the room. Hope bloomed in your chest, you knew your father could not refuse a display like this. Such an open declaration of love, of ownership. You were his and he would fight to the death to make it so in all ways.
It wasn’t long before you seen doors on the stadium floor beginning to open. And Feyd’s smirk turned into a monstrous smile full of blackened teeth. You were his and it was time all knew. Giedi Prime would finally have their na-Baroness.
x
x
#feyd#feyd rautha#feyd x reader#feyd x you#Feyd x yn#feyd rautha x you#Feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha x yn#feyd smut#feyd rautha harkonnen#austin butler#austin butler x reader#austin butler smut#dune fanfiction#dune 2#Ughwrites#Ughfeyd
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𓈒ㅤׂㅤ 𓇼 ࣪ 𝐋𝐔𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐘 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⭒⠀
꒰͡ ⠀ ִ 𝐴𝑒𝑔𝑜𝑛 𝐼𝐼 𝑇𝑎𝑟𝑔𝑎𝑟𝑦𝑒𝑛 𝑥 𝑇𝑎𝑟𝑔𝑎𝑟𝑦𝑒𝑛 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟 ⠀ׂ ⠀ ͡꒱
♡ㅤ𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝅄ㅤೀ
˚꒰♡꒱‧ Hi there! Before you read this, you should know that English is not my first language. Also reader is Rhaenyra's daughter. Hope you enjoy!
The room was dimly lit by the soft glow of the dying embers in the hearth. The heavy drapes blocked out the light of the moon, casting long shadows across the ornate furniture. Aegon lay beside you, his body glistening with sweat, his chest rising and falling heavily as he struggled to catch his breath. His hair, damp and tousled, clung to his forehead. There was a raw vulnerability in his eyes, a pleading that tugged at something deep within you.
As you began to rise, intending to dress and leave, his hand shot out, grasping your wrist with surprising strength. “Please,” he whispered, his voice hoarse and desperate. “Don’t go.”
You paused, looking down at him. His eyes were wide, filled with an anguish that seemed to pierce through you. “I have to,” you replied softly, trying to pull away, but his grip tightened.
“Please,” he repeated, a tremor in his voice. “Stay with me. Just for a little while longer.”
His vulnerability was palpable, a stark contrast to the arrogant, cruel man the world knew. Here, in this dimly lit room, he was just a broken boy, desperate for a gentle touch, for love. You sighed and sat back down on the bed, allowing him to pull you close. He buried his face in your chest, his body trembling with silent sobs.
“I need you,” he choked out. “I can’t be alone. Please, don’t leave me.”
Your heart ached for him, for the pain that seemed to consume him from within. You wrapped your arms around him, holding him tightly, as if you could somehow shield him from the darkness that haunted him. “Shhh... I’m here,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. “I’m here.”
You gently stroked his hair, running your fingers through the soft strands, trying to soothe him. He clung to you like a drowning man to a lifeline, his tears soaking into your skin. “I’m so tired,” he confessed, his voice breaking. “Tired of being alone. Tired of being hated. I just want… I just want someone to love me.”
You swallowed hard, fighting back your own tears. You didn’t love him. How could you? But in this moment, he needed you, and you couldn’t turn away from that. “Hush,” you whispered, rocking him gently. “It’s going to be alright. I’m here.”
He sobbed harder, his body shaking with the force of his misery. “No one loves me. Not my mother, not my father. I’m just… just a burden to them. Why can’t anyone love me?”
His words tore at your heart, the raw pain in his voice echoing in the stillness of the room. “I’m here,” you repeated, your voice breaking. “I’m here.”
Aegon pulled back slightly, his red-rimmed eyes searching yours desperately. “Do you love me?” he asked, his voice trembling, every word heavy with hope and fear.
You felt a lump in your throat, the weight of his question pressing down on you. You couldn’t lie to him, but you couldn’t bear to tell him the truth either. Your silence stretched on, the air thick with tension.
Aegon’s face crumpled, his tears flowing anew. “You don’t,” he whispered, the agony in his voice piercing through you. “No one does.”
He collapsed against you, burying his face in your chest again. “Please,” he begged, his voice muffled against your skin. “Even if it’s a lie, tell me you love me. I need to hear it. Just for tonight, make me believe it.”
Your heart ached with the impossible choice before you. You couldn’t love him, not in the way he so desperately needed, but in this moment, perhaps you could give him a fleeting comfort. You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the lie. “I… I love you, Aegon,” you stuttered, your voice barely above a whisper.
He lifted his head slightly, looking up at you through a veil of tears. A sad, broken smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, his eyes filled with a fragile hope. “Thank you,” he whispered, his voice trembling. Tears continued to fall, tracing silent paths down his cheeks. “Thank you.”
You gently stroked his hair, running your fingers through the soft strands, trying to soothe him. “I’m here,” you repeated softly. “I’m here.”
You began to hum a lullaby, a soft, soothing melody that your mother used to sing to you when you were a child. As you sang, you could feel the tension slowly ebbing away from his body. He clung to you, his breathing gradually evening out, the sobs subsiding.
“Sleep now, my love, let dreams take flight,
In the quiet embrace of the gentle night.
The stars above watch over thee,
In their light, find serenity.
Hush now, my dear, let worries fade,
In the warmth of this moment we’ve made.
Close your eyes and drift away,
To a world where you can safely stay.
Rest, my sweet, in this tender lull,
Where the moonlight kisses, soft and full.
In this night, let peace surround,
In my arms, where love is found.
Dream of a place where hearts are kind,
Where no sorrow lingers, no pain you’ll find.
Let the night carry your fears away,
And in my embrace, find solace, stay.”
You continued to hum, your fingers still tangled in his hair, until finally, his breathing slowed and deepened. He had fallen asleep, his face pressed against your chest, his arms wrapped around you as if he feared you would disappear if he let go.
Just as he was on the edge of sleep, he whispered, “I love you, Y/N.” His voice was soft, vulnerable, and filled with a heartbreaking sincerity.
You looked down at him, at the boy who had grown up in a world of cruelty and neglect, who had been shaped by the bitterness and pain of his childhood. Your heart ached for him, for the love he had never known, the affection he had always craved but never received. You knew you couldn’t give him what he wanted, but in this moment, you could give him peace.
You held him tightly, your heart heavy with the weight of his sorrow, and whispered softly into the darkness, “Sleep well, Aegon. I’m here.”
@ 𝒇𝒓𝒂𝒈𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒃𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒔 . 𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑔𝑖𝑎𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑒, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑡, 𝑜𝑟 𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑦 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑘𝑠 𝑜𝑛 ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑒𝑏𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑠.
MASTERLIST
#ㅤㅤ⠀ㅤ 𓇼ㅤ ㅤ𓂂ㅤㅤ ˚ㅤㅤ ◌ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ㅤ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏#house of the dragon#tom glynn carney#aegon targaryen x reader#aegon ii targaryen x reader#aegon ii targaryen#house targaryen#hotd#house of dragons#aemond targaryen#a song of ice and fire#aegon ii#aegon targaryen#king aegon#aegon the second#aegon x reader#hotd x reader#hotd fanfic#aegon fic#aegon fanfic#aegon ii fanfic#aegon targaryen x you#tw.incest#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond x reader#hotd angst#angst
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The Maiden’s Voyage - A Sukuna x Reader Fanfic Part 3
You’re a passenger on a ship attacked by pirates. The pirate captain Sukuna chooses you to be his entertainment for the voyage.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Smut. 18+. Fem Reader. AU. Sukuna as a Pirate Captain. Noncon/Rape! Very rough sex! Bondage. Violence. Blood. Spanking (with belt). Sukuna is a cruel, sadistic monster here! You’ve been warned!
Part of CandyCandy’s 2k Followers Event! There will be multiple parts because I got really attached to this idea and it was getting too long. Any feedback, comments, reblogs, etc. will make my day sunny and bright! 💖 Dividers by @benkeibear!
Pure, unbridled terror overwhelms you as Captain Sukuna drags you back into his quarters and slams the door shut behind him. He’s angry, you can feel it even though he’s still wearing his regular, smug expression. The fact that he’s not outwardly showing his rage is somehow even scarier.
“Sukuna, I’m sorry! I-“
He suddenly rips the dress over your head, cutting off your pleading voice. You’ve been naked in this room many times, but you’ve never felt more vulnerable. You curl in on yourself, wrapping your arms around your body as you shrink away from him.
“Do you know what I usually do to women who try to escape?” he asks, stepping closer to you.
You shake your head, tears pouring down your face.
He grins. “I use a hammer to break their ankles. Then I force them to dance for me.”
You look him in the eyes. “Is that what you’re going to do to me?”
He stares at you, and for a brief moment, the smirk disappears, and an unreadable expression replaces it. But it only lasts a moment before he grins again. “No. I don’t want to hinder your ability to get on your knees for me. You suck my cock so well after all.”
Sukuna puts his hand on your face, wiping your tears gently. “But I have to punish you. You understand that, right? So I’m going over options in my mind.” His hand moves, his thumb brushing over your lips. “I could break your fingers one by one. Watching you try to jack me off with your little mangled fingers might be exciting. Or I could dig one those pretty eyes out of its socket and keep it as a souvenir.”
You flinch as his fingers come dangerously close to one of your eyes. Both his hands are on you now, pulling your arms away from your body. “Of course the easiest way would be to hand you over to my crew for the night, let them take turns fucking all your holes.”
All you can do is look up at him with teary eyes, the occasional shudder or hiccup shaking your body.
“But I don’t like sharing my toys,” he says, one hand moving to your hair while the other slides down to lightly grope your breast. He jerks your head back by your hair, then kisses you roughly. When he pulls away, he says in that smooth voice of his, “Thirty lashes. With my belt.”
“What?” you ask, not sure you heard him right.
“That’s the punishment I decided on. I’ll give you thirty lashes. That’s the standard on this ship, though we use a whip on the men. I’ll be extremely lenient with you and use my belt.”
You blink away your tears. Being whipped with a belt will surely be painful and humiliating, but it’s far better than broken bones or gouged out eyes. “Why?” you find yourself asking him. “Why be lenient with me?”
He pulls you closer, your body flush against his. “Because I don’t want to completely break you just yet. You’re so delicate,” he says, his large hands moving over your nude, trembling body, “the slightest little thing could crush you. I’m not done playing with you yet.”
You shudder under his touch, his fingers ghosting over your bruises. The room isn’t cold, but you feel an inexplicable chill.
“Now get on the bed, on your hands and knees,” he commands.
You do as you’re told, not wanting to anger him any further. When you’re on the bed, facing his headboard, you suddenly feel shaky on his firm mattress. “L-like this?” you ask.
“Raise your ass higher,” he says, “and spread your knees.”
You glance back at him in time to see him pulling his shirt off, those mesmerizing tattoos moving with his taut muscles as he unbuckles his thick leather belt.
He’s seen every inch of you so many times by now, but somehow you feel more embarrassed than usual as you follow his orders. You move your knees far apart and lean slightly forward so that your ass lifts higher than the rest of you. In this position, your pussy is totally exposed. You bury your face in his sheets, mortified.
“Keep your face up,” he says, stepping closer and wrapping one end of his belt around his fist. “I want to enjoy the expressions you make.”
You look over your shoulder at him as he stands behind you. “Monster,” you mutter under your breath.
“What was that?”
“N-nothing!”
He grins, his red eyes seeming to glow menacingly. “I’ll show you a monster.”
Then, he swings the belt down, hitting it right across both your ass cheeks with enough force to knock your body forward a few inches on the bed. Fresh tears fill your eyes at the pain. You didn’t think it would hurt this much!
Whack!
The second hit is somehow worse than the first, and you choke back a sob. You’re supposed to endure thirty of these?!
Whack!
You clamp your hand over your mouth to avoid screaming. In your mind, you’re repeating a mantra: it’s better than broken bones! It’s better than broken bones!
Whack!
This one hit directly where a previous strike had, and it occurs to you that there’s only so much space on your ass. Meaning most of the hits are going to be on already damaged flesh.
Whack!
You whimper, finally letting pitiful cries escape you.
Sukuna pauses, stepping around to the side to look at your face. “Don’t tell me you’re breaking already,” he says in a mocking tone.
“It hurts!” you cry, your hands gripping the sheets beneath you.
Suddenly you feel his hand on your sore ass. He squeezes it, making you yelp. “It’s supposed to hurt,” he tells you. “This is a punishment, remember? Though I’m not sure your slutty body understands that.”
You look back at him. “What?”
He’s behind you again, staring between your quivering legs. “You’re a mess back here, dripping all over my bed. It’s running down your thighs.”
No way. That can’t be true! You’re not enjoying this! But now that he’s mentioned it, you can feel the wetness there, the fluid sliding down your skin. More humiliated than ever, you try to hide your face again. That’s when his hand slides down, his fingers slipping inside your soaked pussy.
You gasp, your body jerking. Your first instinct is to try to crawl away, but his fingers feel so good! They’re stroking you just right, and the pleasure is such a sweet distraction from the pain. You let out a weak moan, and you hear Sukuna laugh.
“You want me to fuck you, don’t you? You’re clenching around my fingers.”
“No!” you cry, you legs growing wobbly from the pleasure. “It just… it just…”
His thumb glides over your clit. “It just what?”
“It just feels good!” you scream, on the verge of climax.
He moves his hand away, and you whine at the loss. “I’m not letting you cum,” he says, and he brings the belt down again. This time the rough leather collides with your sensitive pussy, and the sting of it makes your vision go white. You cry out, but Sukuna is merciless, giving you five more lashings in the same spot, reducing you to a sobbing mess.
“Now you’ve got my belt sticky,” he says, holding it up. You can see parts of it glistening with your juices.
“Please, I don’t think I can take anymore!”
He moves to the side again, this time putting a hand on top of your head, rubbing your hair. “You can, and you will. And when it’s over, I’ll reward you. I’ll make you cum until you lose your mind, then I’ll fuck this needy little cunt until you can’t walk.”
*********************
Sukuna loves the look on her face, the mixture of arousal and pain. He’s already so hard he could burst out of his pants, and watching her drenched pussy twitch and leak is making it very difficult for him. But he’s strong enough to hold back until her punishment is over.
He continues the lashings, enjoying the sight of the red stripes appearing on her soft skin. Droplets of blood bead along some of the lines, and she makes the sweetest whimpers and sobs. She’s shaking, the sheets balled into her small fists, her lovely face wet with tears. He has to start talking to keep himself from cumming at the mere sight of her.
“Why did you wait so long to try escaping?” he asks her. “I was just about to give up and go back to my cabin. Were you afraid of getting caught? Or… something else?”
Her voice is so small when she answers, “Something… else…” between strikes.
“Oh?” Has she broken down to the point that she can’t think to lie? “And what would that be?”
She doesn’t answer, so he gives her a particularly hard strike, and she cries out, dropping her head onto the mattress. He gives her a moment to catch her breath. When she raises her head again, she looks back at him. Her pretty face looks so embarrassed! It’s delicious!
“I just… had trouble walking out the door,” she finally says. “I don’t know why!”
His hand moves to her wet, quivering pussy again, rubbing it gently. She flinches, probably because of the lines etched into the delicate skin by his belt. “I see. Your body is growing addicted to the pleasure I give you.”
As if to emphasize his point, his fingers stroke her clit, making her moan.
If Sukuna were honest with himself, he’d admit that he’s also becoming addicted to her body, to the way it responds to his touch, to the way she feels wrapped tightly around his cock.
To the way she looks at him and says his name.
There’s only a few lashings left, and bizarrely, Sukuna is eager to finish them. Is it because he wants to fuck her as soon as possible? Or because he’d rather hear her moan than sob?
He’s being very lenient with her already. He didn’t lie when he told her he usually broke the ankles of those who attempted escape. And he did actually consider doing it to her. But when he looked into her terrified eyes, he just couldn’t bear the thought of maiming her.
It’s strange. He finds the pain of others arousing, especially that of beautiful women. And he certainly enjoys hurting this lovely maiden. But he doesn’t think he could enjoy seriously injuring her.
“Last one,” he announces as he swings the belt down a final time. Her body jolts from the impact, but she holds back any sound. Her shoulders are shaking, and he feels the inexplicable urge to pull her into his arms and hold her. But he doesn’t.
“I believe I promised you a reward.”
She looks back at him sharply as his fingers begin caressing her sore, striped body. “Wait, please, I can’t-“
He finds her clit, rubbing it gently, and her words become a moan. Perhaps as a reflex, her body presses back, toward his hand. He looks over the red lines covering her flesh, admiring the way they criss-cross to make beautiful patterns. He traces them with his other hand, then begins lightly kissing them.
She shudders, sighing softly. The small droplets of her blood cling to his lips, and he licks them clean. Every part of her tastes so sweet. Speaking of which….
“Ahhh!” she cries out when she feels his mouth on her dripping pussy, his tongue invading her folds to lap at her swollen clit. He wants to bite her, but remembers this is a reward, so he licks gently until her whole body trembles and she nearly collapses. She cries through her orgasm, overwhelmed by sensation.
He continues licking her, his fingers sliding in and out of her. Totally exhausted, her arms give way, and her top half falls limply on the mattress, her ass still slightly elevated and her thighs still spread. It’s such a vulnerable position, it’s almost pitiful. But how can Sukuna resist such a feast laid out before him?
He makes her cum twice more with his mouth, leaving her weeping and pleading for him to stop. She’s overstimulated, sore, and probably getting emotional. That much is obvious. But Sukuna hasn’t had his fun yet, so he opens his pants and pulls out his rock hard cock, then shoves it into her tender, drooling pussy.
She cries out in sheer desperation, her body practically a rag doll at this point. He firmly grips her waist and pulls it back toward him at the same time as he thrusts into her, allowing him to penetrate even deeper than ever. He thought she’d lost all strength, unable to move, but she’s clenching him so tightly that he has to think of the smelliest, grossest member of his crew for a moment to try to calm himself down.
He slams into her, over and over, while she lies there with her tear streaked face smashed against the sheets. Poor little thing. She doesn’t even realize her night is just getting started.
******************
The next few days go by in a blur. You spend all your time in Sukuna’s quarters. If he’s in the room, he’s usually fucking you, or he’s looking over maps at his desk while you suck him off underneath it.
When you’re alone, you sleep. Once a day you bathe in his private washroom. So far he’s given you no restrictions on how often you can use the bathroom or what you can eat. From what you can tell, you eat the same things he does.
One day you realize with a start that you’re looking forward to him returning to his room, looking forward to seeing his face. You can’t understand why. You’ve come to crave his touch, even though he’s rough and often hurts you. Because sometimes, his touch brings you so much pleasure that you think you might die.
“We’re stopping at a small port today,” he tells you out of the blue. “Just to load up on supplies. You’ll be staying in my quarters of course.”
You nod, having no desire to risk another escape attempt. You got off easy last time. If it happens again, he’ll surely do something terrible to you.
Sukuna leaves, and you spend the day waiting for his return. When he comes back hours later, he reaches you something wrapped in brown paper. “What is this?” you ask him.
“A present. Something that suits you more.”
You can’t imagine what it could be, but you sit on the bed and carefully open the package. Inside, you find a beautiful dress made of red velvet with white lace trim. You hold it up, marveling at its luster. “This is for me?”
He’s grinning as he watches you. “Try it on. I think I guessed your measurements well.”
You hurriedly pull off the tattered dress you’ve been wearing, barely feeling any embarrassment at all at this point. Then you pull on the new dress. It fits you perfectly, and feels luxurious. You rush over to the mirror in the corner of the room and look at your reflection. You’re bruised and your hair is a mess, but the dress looks lovely on you.
“It doesn’t compare to your beauty, but it’s better than the rag you were wearing,” he says.
You feel heat flood your face. You don’t know how to react when he says something like that. “Thank you for the dress. I love it.”
“Good,” he says. “I’ll try not to rip it off you.”
Two days later, Sukuna invites you to join him on the deck. There’s no celebration this time, but the sun is setting over the water, and he pulls you close to him as the two of you watch.
It’s a quiet, peaceful moment, and you almost begin to relax for the first time in days. But then you hear a strained voice say, “Sukuna!”
Both you and the captain turn around to find a man standing a few feet away. He’s clutching a shiny silver dagger in both hands as he stares at the two of you. Sukuna looks at him for a moment then says, “You’re not a member of my crew. Who are you?”
The man has rage in his eyes as he says, “My fiancé was on a ship you raided a month ago. You bastards murdered her and left her body ripped open on the deck! Now I’m going to kill your woman!”
Everything happens so fast. The man lunges at you, pointing the blade right at your chest. You scream and try to put your hands up in a defensive manner. And at the last second, Sukuna moves in front of you, his tall body creating a shield. You hear the terrible sound of a blade stabbing into flesh, and blood splatters across the wooden deck as you cry out Sukuna’s name.
#sukuna x reader#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#jjk x reader#jjk smut#x reader#candys2kevent
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119
&&. unfortunately you aren't as slick as you thought you were.
pairing: lee jeno x gn!reader
genre: fluffity fluff fluff fluff
warnings: sexual jokes, thats it 😚
word count: 1.2k
notes: jj spread the jeno bias disease i literally cant believe this 😭😭 hes so……….im abt to draft another long jeno fic + an smau + another stupid drabble and all of that fun stuff!! dont get it twisted jisung is still my ult though 😒 no ones ever replacing him, anyway this came from a prompt someone sent me, smth about "kissing someone on a ferris wheel" which i just LOVEEEED hello??? okay ik none of you care abt my words, love jeno, love nct dream, pray i get park jisung pcs 😇 good night now <33
you are going to murder na jaemin.
the moment you get off this ferris wheel your throwing up your guts all over his shirt, or punching him in his face, or strangling him to death, whatever. the moment you step off this ride you're making sure he doesn't open his eyes to see the rest of his fellow human beings ever again.
maybe if you were less awkward you'd actually be thanking him, but you take one side glance at the boy beside you and want to smash your head against the glass.
jeno doesn't notice your side glance (and thank goodness he doesn't because you probably would've died if he took so much as a glance at you), he's much too busy glancing at the view from the height your at. you assume that jeno likes ferris wheels, he probably likes them more than you do.
"are you alright?"
you mentally prepare yourself for the voice crack you know might escape your lips. just talk to him like a normal human being, y/n, yeah you're into him and shit but that doesn't mean you can be a weirdo.
"yeah" you finally respond, thank goodness the voice cracks don't come out. "just feeling a little nauseous".
jeno raises an eyebrow. "scared of heights?"
you only manage a curt nod, a nod that makes jeno scoot closer to you, his lips stretching into a smile. "it's alright, i'll protect you".
fuck you lee jeno, fuck you, fuck you, fuck yo—
your somehow able to chuckle, amused by his words. "it's not like i'm dying or anything".
jeno frowns. "so you don't want my protection?"
you pretend to think about it, pressing your lips together as your eyebrows furrow, avoiding eye contact with jeno at all costs. if you look at him, your going to fall and never get up. "i wouldn't be entirely against it".
jeno's shoulder nudges yours, nothing but a small touch that drives you crazy. you wonder if the mini breakdown your having is noticeable, if maybe, he's doing it on purpose, making your heart race to get a kick out of it.
but when you think about it further, it makes you giggle, because this is lee jeno, you could get down on one knee and propose to him yet he'd still be confused by how you feel for him.
if lee jeno knew how you felt for him really, you probably wouldn't have resisted the urge to make out with him on this fucking ride or already.
that was a strange thought, a stupid one even, but it's one manifested from your deepest desires.
when you think about it, though, you wouldn't exactly mind it.
"that's good" jeno snickers at you, eyes examining your face as if it's an interesting exhibit at an art museum. "you need me".
you feign a sigh of irritation. "of course, what would i do without you?"
"you'd die, clearly" jeno replies, tilting his head and reaching over to lace your fingers with his. the cold rings on his fingers feel like glass shards against your fingers, but his soft hands contrast his stabbing rings. "isn't this sort of romantic?"
you choke on your spit.
"romantic? roma— hah! what are you talking about? what is romantic about this?"
soooo natural, y/n.
jeno simply shrugs, suddenly very interested in the view of the carnival from the ferris wheel. "were on a ferris wheel together, stars before us, just the two of us, this would be like.. the perfect date".
you blink, the words making you pause and your head spin. is he serious? is he really serious?
"is this your way of asking me out?"
you manage to ask that without sounding like a pathetic idiot who wanted to hear those exact words, and your response gets the same reaction out of jeno, flushed cheeks with an awkward chuckle accompanying the sight. you would've thought you were a genius if you weren't as flustered as he was.
jeno is speechless, and he fumbles through his speech like someone's holding him at gunpoint or something. "i— no! no! ..maybe? kinda?"
you pause, all your former confidence suddenly withering away, the blood rushing to your cheeks in full force. you laugh, taking his words as a joke, but jeno keeps silent, and so do you.
"are you serious?"
jeno can't speak, so he just nods wordlessly.
you blink, glancing from side to side, this ferris wheel won't be on the ground soon, but at least this makes it a little more bearable. "did you just confess your feelings for me like that?"
"well to be fair—"
"i was supposed to do it first!" you yell in another fit of feigned irritation, your cheeks a color reminiscent of jeno's cherry red shirt. "that's not fair! you beat me to it!"
"well how was i supposed to know you liked me back?"
you scoff, and jeno goes silent again, embarrassed by the question he just asked.
"you're such an idiot lee jeno.."
"can i kiss you?"
the question is a blurt of pure desperation, pure honesty from the deepest corners of jeno's mind, an inquiry he's been dying to ask you ever since he found himself interested in staring at your lips.
you hope you don't faint from the scorching heat radiating off your face.
"it's romantic" he laughs, his best excuse for that random inquiry. "i've always wanted to kiss someone in a ferris wheel, unless you don't want to then—"
you (in the most cliche turn of events) cut jeno off with a kiss. though you'd love to keep your fingers intertwined, you let go of his hand to find purchase on his shoulder, then tug him closer to you with a light jerk. a small squeak emits from him, but he quickly relaxes into the kiss, giggling at your enthusiasm.
though he giggles, he isn't much better off. it's nothing but a small press of the lips, it's not intense or anything, but jeno feels his heart soar. hie face heats to overwhelming heights, and he loops his arm around your waist, pressing you against him, as if the idea of not feeling every part of you would be maddening.
you both are just as desperate as each other, there's no push, just pull. it's a playful competition, your waiting for the other to pull away, stop the kiss because they need breath, it's stubborn in an idiotic way.
but jeno loses your little battle, because he pulls away for air, as red as the sunset in the early morning.
and though you laugh at the sight, you aren't much better off yourself (if the heat continuing to permeate from your face is enough).
"was that romantic enough for you?"
even with how breathless he is, jeno still manages a stupid question.
he squeals when you land a slap on his shoulder.
and while you thought you two were slick about it, considering you were like five feet in the air with nobody to see you, your equally red faces and intertwined hands were enough to get feigned vomits from your friends.
jaemin snickers as he looks between you two, and you glare as you see him open his mouth.
"so what happened up there?"
"clearly they got it on".
upon hearing the words, you let go of jeno's hand to yell and chase after lee donghyuck, who squeals and sprints away, shouting for renjun to help him.
jaemin just sends jeno a knowing look, a look that the older pretends he isn't bothered by.
for once, one of his ploys finally worked.
#lee jeno#jeno#nct#nct dream#nct imagines#nct drabbles#nct scenarios#nct dream imagines#nct dream drabbles#nct dream scenarios#jeno imagines#jeno drabbles#jeno scenarios#lee jeno x reader#𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!
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Hey so, I was wondering if you could do a f/f hero x villain snippet, where the hero is in a super secret relationship with the villain, but, despite the villain explicitly having other goals, betrayed and used the hero, the hero still loved her? Until one day the hero gets so tired of it that she leaves the city without a single world and villain goes after her? sorry if its too specific
"Where are you going?"
Part of the hero had expected it, but it still didn't make it any easier to hear that voice in her motel room. Her shoulders tensed. She kept her gaze trained firmly on unzipping her bag.
"Hey." The villain's voice sharpened. She crossed the room, taking hold of the hero's wrist. "You can't just leave. What the hell?"
The hero yanked her hand back. Her head snapped up.
The villain stopped, at whatever expression it was that she saw on the hero's face. She wet her lips. "Look," she said, gentler. "This is silly. Just come home, alright? We can talk about this."
"I don't want to talk to you right now."
"Baby-"
"Don't." The hero's jaw clenched. "Don't you even." The hero looked back down again, pulling out her toiletries and night clothes. It was easier than looking at the villain; flaying herself raw with the memories and the longing and the awful truths that she should have accepted so very long ago. "Just go. If you ever loved me, just go. Please."
For a second, she thought that might work. At least, she'd thought the villain might temporarily back off, maybe get another room and try again in the morning.
(She wasn't sure if that would be a confirmation of love or the lack of it. Did it matter anymore?)
The villain crouched down in front of her, studying the hero's face. Her eyes flickered.
"I really hurt you this time, huh?"
The hero swallowed.
They'd had so many arguments, the villain and her. There had been times when she'd been furious that the villain simply couldn't seem to change her ways, change her plans, not even for the sake of the two of them. There had been yelling and cold demands and promises to do better. Apologies pressed on honeyed lips.
"We're more important than the world," the villain had said, kissing the hero's head. "You're my world now."
But that hadn't been true.
There had been times when she'd broke her heart over the villain. She'd wondered if it was her fault, somehow. If she needed to try harder, love better. She'd wondered just how bad things had once been for the villain to so compulsively choose victory over kindness. Revenge over love. Her plans, over the hero.
"Of course I love you," the villain had snapped. "I just don't see why love means I'm the only one who has to change. What about you? You're not perfect! Crying in an argument is super manipulative, you know?"
All that was left was tiredness. A hollow exhaustion.
"Yeah," the hero said. "You win."
"This isn't what I wanted."
"Well, now you know what it's like to have your lover not care about about what you want."
"You care." The villain said it with such certainty. She reached out to cradle the hero's jaw in her hands, delicate, like she was incapable of any pain she might cause. "You've never been able to stop caring. You're caring right now."
"Maybe. But I'm still done."
The villain's grip tightened.
"You're not done. We can't be done."
"Go home."
"Not without you."
"Why?"
"What do you mean why?" The villain's eyes turned stormy. "You're mine. I'm yours. We belong together."
"And do you still find it good? Us?"
The villain stopped short again, as if she hadn't expected the question, as if she hadn't even considered it. Her hands dropped to her sides.
"You used me," the hero said. "I loved you and you used me. Do you understand that?"
The villain stared at her, uncertain in the face of the hero's tone. The tectonic shift of it. "I love you."
The hero shrugged.
"You don't love me anymore, is that it?" the villain demanded. "Because I don't believe that for a second."
"Sure, I love you."
"So come home. Baby." The villain surged to bestow a kiss to the hero's forehead, as if enough sweetness could once again wash away all that was bitter, or at least sufficiently mask the taste of the poison. "We've got over worse than this before. It's just how we are, you know? We fight. We make up. We don't just - you don't just leave."
The hero had wanted to simply slip away. Let it go without another fight she wasn't sure her heart had the energy for anymore. Of course the villain would never allow that.
There was always a final battle, wasn't there?
And the villain would stay no matter how cruel the hero was to her in turn. It was the way of her. But the hero didn't want to be cruel. She'd never wanted that.
"I don't think we're good," the hero said. "I don't think we've been good for a long time now."
"I'll be better."
"You never are though, are you?"
The villain swallowed. Tears flooded her eyes.
"I spent so long thinking that my love wasn't enough." The hero reached up, despite herself, to wipe those once-in-a-lifetime tears away from the villain's cheeks. Then she stood, looming over her very own perfect monster. "But it was. I was. And yours just isn't anymore."
The hero plucked up her things and made for the bathroom, pausing in the doorway, glancing back. The villain knelt on the floor, her head bowed as if for the slaughter. The hero summoned up the very last of her strength.
"You've always been so good at keeping secrets, but you're not keeping me anymore," she said. "Don't still be here when I come out."
She locked the door of them for good.
#villains and heroes#heroes and villains#angst#break ups#relationships#writing#story#f/f#fic#fiction#original fiction#dialogue#betrayal
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Genius (8) - R U Mine
Cairo Sweet x female (G!P) Reader
Summary: It was such a cliché, a reunion she didn’t expect to ever happen, let alone six years after she last saw you. It was supposed to mean nothing, a bit of nostalgia, maybe a brief catching up while waiting for class, it was supposed to be a small wave of nostalgia, not a tsunami that disrupted her entire life. You were her opposite, and as hard as she tried she couldn’t resist your pull.
Story masterlist / First part / Previous Part
Word count: 2.5k
-And I can't help myself all I wanna ever say is, "Are you mine?"-
She really should have started writing her assignment, just so she could get it over with as soon as possible, but somehow, she just wanted to stay right where she was right now. In her bedroom, lying on her bed, engulfed in warm, soft blankets and your arms around her waist as she snuggled with you. It’s been a while since she relaxed like this, now, she wasn’t a morning person, but she rarely spent her free mornings in bed.
“What’s on your mind?” you asked her softly and kissed the top of her head. She straddled you and sat up with a teasing smirk on her face.
“How dare you be so gentle now? After you rocked my world last night?” she poked your chest jokingly.
You pressed a finger on your chin and looked up, acting as if you were in deep thought, the entire act completed with a soft hum. “Good point, good point, I don’t think you minded it thought,” you grinned, way too happy with what you did to her and for a moment she wondered how quickly could she get you hard and just leave you hanging.
Eh, that was a bit too cruel. Besides, you were right, though she wouldn’t admit it right now. In the throes of passion, yeah, absolutely, now that she was just cuddling with you, no, no way in hell would she admit how much you affected her.
“I’ll never say it,” she teased you, leaning down to kiss you.
You wouldn’t open your mouth for her though, and instead cupped her cheek and went for a more gentle, innocent kiss.
“I have your letter, it’s all the proof I need,” you laughed and well, she did confess how much she wanted you in the letter.
“I’ll burn it,” Cairo countered, not yet ready to admit her loss.
“You read it to me, I won’t forget it,” you had a point there, she had to admit that.
Well, she still had a way out, at least she hoped. “I’ll fill your brain with so many even dirtier thoughts you’ll have to forget it,” she whispered it in your ear, enjoying how sharply you inhaled at that.
Your pupils dilated as you looked her in her eyes, and she was sure her own eyes weren’t any less filled with desire and love she felt right now. She wasn’t ready to say it to you, that what she felt went above and beyond high school love, that she felt the madman’s love, and that she knew her feelings were returned. She felt it yesterday, she felt it as you took her, as the two of you burnt up in your emotions, all the desire and lust and need. She found it in you, the ruins of a friendship being rebuilt into the love that felt so right, that felt as if it was tailor-made just for her.
Maybe it was.
“Cairo,” her name rolled off your tongue so smoothly and she wanted to hear you say it more, she wanted to hear you say it ten years from now, twenty years from now, fifty years from now, with that same intensity and love in your voice. “What was on your mind?” you demanded, and she was at a loss on what to tell you.
“Us, this morning, yesterday, so many things at once. I just feel happy, I feel loved for the first time in a long time, maybe in my entire life,” she pressed her finger on your lips when you tried to speak up. “You asked why I pushed you away when we were kids, well,” she paused, moving from your lap and lying back down next to you. Her arms wrapped around you as she held onto you, knowing you wouldn’t disappear on her, but still needing to make sure.
“I wanted my parents to love me,” she began, knowing how confusing it must have sounded. “You remember how they were, right? Distant, uninterested, yet with high expectations,” she told you and felt, more than saw, you nodding. “I got a C on that test, remember? The one where only you and I got Cs and more than two thirds of the class failed?”
“I remember,” you told her, and she could tell you weren’t done. “If it was some other test I would have forgotten it, I can’t even remember if it was my first C or not, but I lost you right after it, and it just remained stuck in my memory,” you sighed, tightening your hold on her as you likely remembered how your next conversation went.
“They were disappointed, yelled all night, and I thought I’d make them happier is I stopped ‘wasting time’ as they put it,” she paused, buried her face in your neck and waited for your response.
“And one of those was the time you spent playing with me,” you said what she couldn’t and she just nodded.
“I thought if I did even better, if I never made any mistakes, if I was their perfect daughter, that they would love me more. They still pretend I don’t exist, like I’m the biggest mistake they ever made,” that was at the core of everything she did, she figured. Craving madman’s love, a love so strong it would consume her entirely, because she’s never been given the unconditional love of her parents she heard and read so much about. Perhaps, looking at it now that she was no longer trying to seduce him, she went after Miller’s love for that reason as well. Because deep down she felt like she needed validation from someone older, someone old enough to be her parent. Sure, Winnie’s talk pushed her toward Miller, but deep down, the key push was likely related to never feeling love from her parents. “I had you, and I gave you up for something I couldn’t ever gain,” she sighed, angry at herself for ever thinking that, for ever giving you up.
“Your parents are a special kind of fucked up,” you sounded angry, and though she knew any anger you may be feeling was directed at her parents she still worried some of it was reserved for her. “You have me now, we’re together, we’ll make up for the lost time,” you assured her as you gently rubbed circles on her back.
“I guess you would have left anyway, since your parents moved,” that was something that brought her some comfort, though it felt so hollow. “Right?” your silence made her prop herself up to look you in the eyes and the uncomfortable look on your face was enough even without your confirmation. “Y/N?”
“Not quite. I could have stayed, I just, had no reason to. And I could have come back two years ago as well,” you confessed, not wanting to lie to her, and she just looked down, processing the information as you sat up and pulled her onto your lap. “Cairo, listen to me,” you brushed her hair back, “Don’t get stuck on what-ifs, things worked out, and maybe they wouldn’t have if we stayed as best friends.”
It was a valid point, but at the same time, the fact that she was the one who gave you the reason to leave by not being your reason to stay hurt. She never considered that your departure could have been avoided, but then again, she never cared to learn more about the circumstances behind your parents moving. Maybe one of them could have stayed with you, or maybe they could have paid for someone else to make sure you were taken care of, they certainly had enough money to do what Cairo’s parents did.
It was also true that the past six years shaped both of you. Nothing proved that as much as how long it took her to recognize you when she first sat down next to you. Hell, she failed to recognize you in the hall, not that she paid much attention to you, even after Winnie said your name, she brushed it off as coincidence, as universe playing a cruel joke by reminding her of you.
In the end, you were right, thinking about what-ifs wasn’t helping either of you. “I still wish I didn’t push you away, I was stubborn, and then I was scared you were angry at me,” there, you had all the pieces of the puzzle.
“I knew you were stubborn, I guess I wanted you to come to me, we were children, immature, not realizing it didn’t matter how we made up didn’t matter as much as making up itself,” you understood, you weren’t angry at her, you accepted everything she said, and Cairo felt the weight she carried for so long being erased. She felt lighter, she felt even more loved.
“Are you mine?” she asked, bringing her lips closer to yours.
“I am,” you closed the distance and kissed her.
And there, with your lips dancing with hers, with your hands resting on her sides and her own holding you close to her, she did her best to convey, through her kiss, through her touch, to her soft moans into the kiss, that she was yours as well.
~X~
“Never fear, Winnie is here!” resounded through the mansion as you cleaned your helmet in Cairo’s living room to the soft tunes of Celine Dion playing in the background. Your helmet got really dirty, the mud and the rain didn’t do it any good, that was for sure, and you were surprised it wasn’t scratched, considering Cairo tossed it aside yesterday.
“That is exactly what I fear,” Cairo teased as she came into the living room just as Winnie barged in with the most flamboyant outfit you saw on her thus far. She had the bright sunglasses on, even though she was inside Cairo’s house, her skirt was longer, though still above her knees and it flowed a bit as she moved, but that was nothing compared to the flashy coat she had on, hanging from her shoulders as the sleeves magically flowed behind her back. Her shirt was so bright you wondered if you should go grab some sunglasses as well and she had several bags in her hands.
“Don’t tell me, there’s a secret government organization after you and this was your only disguise,” you grinned a bit when she raised her sunglasses and looked through the window.
“I lost her, for now,” she laughed, dropping down on the sofa close to you. “And it’s even worse than secret organization. It’s my art teacher, and I’m late for her assignment,” she cackled, tossing one of the bags toward you while you still had the helmet in your hands.
“Wait!” you yelled helplessly and fumbled a bit, but still managed to catch it.
“So that’s why I can’t see your underwear,” Cairo teased and sat down next to you.
“I’ll show it to you if it’ll get me a threesome,” Winnie tossed the second bag to Cairo and then took her sunglasses off.
Cairo rolled her eyes. “I’m not sharing,” she took out her chicken biscuits as you checked the content of your own bag and saw it was the same thing.
“Baby, you’d be shared,” Winnie said it so casually you nearly choked on the chicken you were chewing.
Cairo glanced at you and hummed. “You don’t know what I know,” and now you definitely choked, and she had to pat you on the back.
Winnie raised an eyebrow. “Share the spoils, also, that was quick, I didn’t think you’d lose your virginity before me, yet here we are,” the girl had no filter whatsoever.
“Not one word,” you warned Cairo as you tried to clear your throat and get rid of the awful feeling of nearly choking on food.
“And here I brought you lunch,” Winnie teased you and you just had to wonder how Cairo managed to deal with all the teasing, because, damn, the girl didn’t hold back. “Did you know Cairo dreamt about you? Like, way before you came back?”
Now it was Cairo’s turn to nearly choke. “Winnie!” she cried out, blushing furiously as her secret was revealed.
You just grinned and nudged her with your elbow. “Oh, you’ll never hear the end of this,” you promised her, and you decided you’d do everything in your power to get the details out of her.
“I’ll never tell you,” Cairo knew exactly what was going through your mind.
“Wanna bet?” you smirked and leaned over to Winnie. “Say, you’ve been her best friend these past four years. Give me some advantage here,” you nearly laughed at how betrayed Cairo looked at the moment.
Winnie raised her hand to her lips and pretended she was whispering, though Cairo heard everything loud and clear. “You could fuck her on your bike, or hear me out, reenact one of the smutty scenes she loves to read so much in return for the details,” she suggested. “I’m not sure how you’ll fill her with cum, but I’m sure she’ll be satisfied with 95 percent accuracy.”
Cairo glared at both of you. “She won’t have issues with filling me up,” she immediately got her revenge, and you watched as Winnie glanced down and then up to your face. “Yes,” Cairo confirmed it before Winnie could ask.
“So,” Winnie paused for a moment to clear her throat. “About that threesome,” she just laughed when Cairo threw a paper bag at her.
“I’ll go and get something sweet,” Cairo grumbled as she stood up and went toward her kitchen.
“You sure we can’t share you?” Winnie cackled when all she got as a response was a middle finger. “She’s happy, you know,” she suddenly told you and smiled, an actual, honest, no teasing whatsoever smile softened her face.
You tilted your head, not sure how she got that from this interaction.
“You still have some catching up to do, but she likely isn’t as open and relaxed as she was when you were kids. She’s absurdly stiff, and sure, she laughs, and smiles, but she’s just radiating from how happy she is right now. You see her, you love her, and she’s wanted that for so long, to be loved by someone who can take her loneliness away and take her away from here when she can’t do it for herself,” Winnie explained to you, and though she didn’t say it, you dared to think she left one bit unsaid, the part likely going along the lines: ‘you did something I couldn’t,’ because you saw just how much Winnie cared about Cairo, and you were thankful for that.
“I’ll get up to speed, I want to make her as happy as I possibly can,” you said, looking toward the kitchen. And you’d do just that, you’d do absolutely everything in your power to make sure she never felt lonely again.
A/N: How do I put this. Enjoy the happy times! We’re entering a bit of a angst part from the last third of the next chapter… Four chapters to go though!
Taglist: @deimaisgail @bee-keeping @marvelous-disaster @jmwetterlund @tekanparadiae
@alexkolax @ioveyouyouloveme @aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh @autorasexy @lifeforsimp13
@puta1 @minnyyminny
#cairo sweet x female reader#cairo sweet x reader#cairo sweet#miller's girl#jenna ortega x reader#x reader#x female reader
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Simon/reader
This is my first Simon fic so be kind! Check me out on Ao3 (DirtyMana)
Fuck.
Rage was a nasty thing. Where anger simmered, rage boiled over. Where sorrow lingered, rage consumed. Simon knew that this would bring nothing but pain, though that didn't stop the nasty sensation from creeping up his throat, paired nicely with bile and an excess of saliva. His jaw tightened. His fists clenched. He felt feral.
It wasn't fair. Wasn't fair that other men could conjure up flirtations so easily. Wasn't fair that other men could make your lashes flutter and your cheeks flush. You weren't his, sure, but maybe if he had the words you would be. Why didn't he have the words?
Simon knew how he felt. He knew he softened his tone around you. Knew he went out of his way to make you laugh. Knew his heart beat faster at the sight of you. But how do you put any of that into words?
This would all be fine if it was just sexual. He’d had his fair share of quick fucks, sure, but this was different. This went deeper. You deserve better than him, he knows that, but still he craves what he can not have. He fumes in the corner of the shitty pub. Rages. Watches silently as you brush drunken advances off, ordering a second round and swiftly carrying the drinks back to your shared booth. Your lips move but he doesn't hear a thing. Just nods every few seconds.
“Simon?”
Can't you see what you do to him?
“Simon.”
Can’t you see how he aches?
“Simon!”
He startles. He can’t remember the last time someone startled him. The fuck’s happening to me?
“Hm?”
“You okay? Been hitting it pretty hard.”
Your pretty eyes dart down. His gaze follows. Empty glasses that were once filled with a piss-poor brew are scattered around him. Shit.
“Guess ‘m just feelin' a bit messy.”
Concern dances across your features, a confused smile melting into a pout.
Fuck
“Do you need me to drive you home?”
You must be able to tell he’s about to refuse because your face hardens, insistence written all over.
“Alright big guy, let’s go.”
The car ride is quiet, nearly silent if not for your soft humming. The tune had been damn near intolerable when blasting through the pub’s speakers, though your sweet voice transforms it into something much more grand. His thoughts swirl as he watches the dreary scenery flit by, head pressed to the window of your car.
You’re too sweet. Too kind. It isn't fair that you're so good and he’s so bad.
It isn't long before you're pulling into his driveway, your headlights shining into the bare interior of his house. Price had encouraged him to buy the place, tired of Simon lingering on base when he should’ve been relaxing. He had yet to decorate, much to your irritation. “What kind’ve friend am I if I let you live like this?” You'd said it with a teasing smirk, gesturing wildly about. Cute.
There is a moment of pause, the car’s engine rumbling to a stop. You turn your head, presumably to say something, though you stop yourself. He thinks for a second that you're trying to kick him out, bid him farewell and leave. You really ought to. You don’t. When he reaches for his car door, you reach for yours. You loop your arm through his while walking him to his door, as if you could steady his stumbling, catch his fall. Simon breaks contact only to rifle through his pockets, pulling his house key out and sliding into the door. Again, there is a pause, a moment of uncertainty. Your eyes seem to plead. When he turns the handle he makes sure to give you enough room to slide past him, shedding shoes and coats in his entryway.
Already the room seems more alive, your scattered belongings somehow ushering light into his dark little life. Few words are exchanged as you help him shed his outer layers, the occasional murmur of his name and exacerbated chuckle echoing in the foyer. He catches himself leaning into your warm touch.
Fuck
You manage to untangle yourself from his grip, nudging him away from the door. He briefly considers making his way to his actual bed, but quickly dismisses the thought. He doesn't want to scare you off and, honestly, in his squiffy stupor, the couch looks quite nice. With his back the cushions and his arms outstretched he looks to you.
“C’mon then, pet.”
You blush, must be the lighting, and follow suit, making yourself comfortable atop his chest. It’s not rare that the two of you touch, though it’s the first time Simon’s been the one to instigate. If he could purr, he would. He’s getting lazy, not even trying to hide the way his droopy eyes trace the lines of your face. He leans forward a centimeter, an inch, two inches. He’s ready for you to jerk back. For you to scream. For you to insist that you always have been, and always will be, just friends. But you don’t do any of those things. You lean forward too. You close the gap.
Sparks fly as lips part.
Didn’t know it could be like this, I don’t think. Didn’t know it could be so sweet. So soft. Is this what all those lovesick, puppy-eyed recruits were talking about?
Thoughts slowed as the kiss went on. It felt like touching an exposed wire, somehow burning and numbing all at the same time, intensifying every feeling yet dulling any sense that wasn't focused on you. When you pull away, an unspoken tension seems to be cleared from the air, leaving only the comfortable warmth of familiarity and affection. Simon wants to say something suave, something charming. Simon wants to finally find the words. But his eyelids feel so heavy and you feel so warm and for the first time in his life, he knows he will sleep.
It can wait for the morning. I can wait for the morning.
#call of duty#cod mw2#simon riley x reader#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost cod#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghost call of duty#dirtymana
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1 STEP FORWARD, 3 STEPS BACK: Rafe Cameron x fem!reader
Based off of the song 1 step forward, 3 steps back by Olivia Rodrigo
TW: Toxic relationship, emotional & verbal abuse, drug usage, references to sexual relations but no smut, addiction, heavy angst, small amount of fluff, guilt tripping for not having sex (I do NOT condone any of this, you should never be made to feel guilty if you don’t want to sleep with someone!), Rafe being an arsehole
Word count: around 3,500
‘Called you on the phone today
Just to ask you how you were
All I did was speak normally
Somehow I still struck a nerve
You’re laid down on your front, hand mindlessly plucking at your lilac coloured blanket as your other hand holds your phone close to your ear, waiting for your boyfriend to answer your call.
“Hello?” Rafe’s deep voice rings through the other end, cutting out the ringing sound that you’d been listening to whilst waiting on an answer.
You smile softly, “Hey baby, just thought I’d ring, not heard off of you in a few hours.” You say, still plucking mindlessly at your blanket as Rafe sniffles down the phone before he answering.
“Uh yeah, been busy with Barry sorry, what’ve you been up to?” He asks, and while deep down you know he’s distracted and probably doesn’t even care about what you’ve been doing as long as you’re not out flirting with other boys or…out doing anything at all.
“Barry? I didn’t realise you were hanging with him today, is he doing okay?” You ask sweetly, kind nature shining through despite how much you disliked Barry for continuing to get Rafe involved with dealings.
“Why you sound so mad about me hanging with Barry, huh?” Rafe snaps back and your heart plummets to your stomach as you pause your mindless ministrations on your blanket.
“Wha- I’m not mad, baby, I was just asking-“ You start but you don’t have the opportunity to finish as Rafe is quick to cut you off.
“Well fucking don’t! I don’t wanna deal with your bitchy attitude, it’s like you- you’re judging me or something so just cut it out a’ight? Get enough of that from my fucking dad, didn’t know my girl would be all up in my business to.” He says, voice agitated and slurred making it clear to you he’d been snorting up lines like there was no tomorrow.
You stay still in your place, eyes laced with tears that were on the verge of falling if you didn’t swallow the lump in your throat.
“What, you gone mute or something?” Rafe snaps and you jolt slightly, clearing your throat as you answer.
“M’ sorry.” You mutter, voice strained and quiet as though he’d zapped every inch of energy and happiness from you in a matter of seconds.
“Yeah, yeah whatever.” He scoffs, the sound of beeping ringing through your speaker signifying that he’d ended the call and as you slowly lower your phone from your ear, silent tears stream down your face and instead of picking mindlessly at your blanket you bury your face into it.
You got me fucked up in the head, boy
Never doubted myself so much
Like, am I pretty? Am I fun, boy?
I hate that I give you power over that kind of stuff
Parties had become something you dreaded immensely.
Rafe would usually leave you as soon as you arrived, seeking out people to sell his stuff to and snorting so many lines of it that you’d be left to deal with either his raging temper or his raging boner.
Despite that fact, you made sure you looked your prettiest each time. At the start of your relationship, Rafe showered you in compliments each time you’d get all dressed up but now he’d simply complain about how long you took and then he’d go flirt with some other look or touron making you seriously question whether you were even pretty enough anymore.
And at this particular party? You felt the burning pit of insecurity like it was etched onto your skin.
You were sat beside Rafe, two other kook girls across from you who were alongside Kelce and Barry.
Rafe was pouring out some coke from a small baggie, organising it into lines as he glanced toward you briefly.
“You want some?” He asks, pupils blown as wide as spaceships.
“No, I’m okay.” You say immediately, you’d never wanted to indulge in things like cocaine as you’d drawn the line at weed and alcohol.
“Oh my god, you’re like no fun are you? Live a little, girl.” One of the kook girls hanging off Kelce’s arms says, making the surrounding people laugh in response as their eyes dart to you.
And the worst part? Rafe laughs along with them.
“Alright then.” You mutter quietly, making the same girl holler in excitement as Rafe smiles, gesturing to the lines of cocaine he’d organised.
“All yours, baby.”
And as you sniff up the line of coke, you wonder when you’d let Rafe have so much power over the way you perceived yourself.
‘Cause it's always one step forward and three steps back
I'm the love of your life until I make you mad
The next morning you woke up to a regretful Rafe, the boy showering you with a million apologies for essentially forcing you to do something you’d never been comfortable doing in the past.
You’d assured him it was okay but he still preached his guilt, continuing to spend the remainder of the day spoiling you with a shopping trip and ending it with a walk on the beach.
The day had you feeling hopeful, Rafe had promised earlier on that he’d atleast stop doing cocaine around you so you wouldn’t be forced to.
This was progress…wasn’t it?
The hope you felt quickly diminished when you caught sight of your old friends, JJ and John B.
And JJ would be damned if he didn’t say hello to you, while you never talked much to the Pogues anymore JJ’s loyalty was impossible to extinguish. If the Maybank boy cared about you, he wasn’t ever going to let those feelings diminish.
“Ain’t this a sight for sore eyes?” A voice calls from behind you, making yours and Rafe’s heads whip around as you come face to face with JJ who is lightly jogging toward you both. John B trailing slowly behind as he adjusts two surf boards under his arms.
“How you been, y/n/n?” He asks, head cocking to the side as his messy blonde hair moves softly with it.
You open your mouth to speak but Rafe quickly cuts you off, hand tightening on your own “She’s good.”
JJ’s face immediately drops as he narrows his eyes, “Don’t think I was asking you, bro.” He says dryly as Rafe clenches his jaw.
“You gonna answer then?” Rafe spits out, making you look at him with pleading eyes, knowing by the look on his face that he was going to end this in a fight with you.
He simply gives you a glare and you turn to JJ, eyes not daring to meet his.
“Uh yeah, I’ve been good, you?” At your words Rafe lets out a scoff and you bite your lip anxiously, praying to whatever god that whatever has him mad will be resolved quickly.
“You know me, I’m always a’ight, you should uh come by the Chateau soon so we can catch up with ya…we’ve missed you.” JJ says, eyes trained intently on you as he ignores Rafe’s looming presence.
“Yeah, that sounds real nice.” You say, smiling softly and before you can say anything else Rafe is tugging you away.
“Yeah, real good to see you JJ, always a fucking pleasure!” He shouts sarcastically, ignoring how the blonde boy calls out your name when John B finally makes it to his side. You send an apologetic smile over your shoulder as Rafe’s hand detaches from your own.
“That sounds real nice?” Rafe parrots your words, eyes wild with anger as he scoffs to himself continuing his rapid walk back to the truck.
“What else was I supposed to say?” You ask desperately, running slightly to keep up with Rafe’s fast paces as he refuses to slow down for you.
“Rafe!” You call out when he doesn’t respond, the two of you now all but five meters from his truck.
That’s when he spins back to face you, face scrunched in anger as he points at you.
“I’ll tell you what your fucking problem is, y-you can’t be happy with what I’m giving you so you put on the sad kicked puppy act when Maybank is around for what? Huh? You fucking him or something?” Rafe shouts in anger, now towering over you as you all but freeze in your place.
“What? No I’m not fucking Jay, Rafe. I haven’t seen him in months, ever since you told me to stop hanging round with my friends!” You say, voice trembling as you attempt to hold back tears of frustration not missing the way Rafe’s eyes flash with more anger.
“You might as well be fucking him, you got nicknames for him and shit?” He states mockingly, letting out a dry laugh when you go to correct your mistake as a force of habit from your childhood, he spins back toward his truck before you can even respond. “Go hang with Maybank for all I care, prove how much of an attention seeking whore you are.”
Your brows furrow as Rafe rounds his truck, clambering into it as you step forward.
“Rafe?” You call out, listening to him start his truck and rev the engine. You begin walking toward the truck but Rafe reverses so quickly that sand flicks up leaving you to shield your face when he spins the truck around,leaving you stood there.
It's always one step forward and three steps back
Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don't understand
You receive an abundant of text messages from Rafe later on in the same night as your pacing the small space of your room, nibbling anxiously on your nails.
Rafe 💜: am sory baby
Rafe 💜: Pogue get me soooooo pissed
Rafe 💜: I lobe u so moch ❤️❤️
You let out a groan of frustration at the words, your mind spinning as though you’d experienced whiplash. You didn’t know how to keep up anymore, you didn’t understand.
No, I don't understand
You: I love you too 🤍
And maybe in some masochistic way
I kinda find it all exciting
Like, which lover will I get today?
Will you walk me to the door or send me home cryin'?
Your sat reading on the dock at the back of your house, one foot dangling into the water when your phone buzzes.
Rafe 💜: coming over.
Your stomach churns with an excited sort of nervousness, mind reeling on how Rafe is going to be today.
His emotional imbalance had made such an impact upon your own that you didn’t know how to feel anymore, whatever you felt was never right in his eyes.
you: okay, on the dock <3
When you hear Rafe’s footsteps drawing closer you don’t dare look up, pretending to be engrossed in your book to see how he would react.
Whether he’d be his teasing normal self that you’d fallen in love with or the coked up angry Rafe that you’d grown to hate.
Rafe steps grow dangerously near and his voice comes along with them, “That book so interesting it mutes your hearing?” He asks, voice boarding on teasing as you look up at him a few meters from you.
You smile and shrug, “It’s a good book.”
Rafe cocks a brow, coming to a standstill in front of you as locks down upon you.
“That good book better than my presence?” He asks, and some part of you sighs in relief at his calm demeanour and undiluted pupils.
“Not a chance.” You say, holding your hands out for Rafe to pull you up and as he does he picks you up into a tight hug and spins the both of you around as you squeal in delight.
It's one step forward and three steps back
I'm the love of your life until I make you mad
It's always one step forward and three steps back
Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don't understand
“Come on baby, please.” Rafe pleads with you, hands tugging at the waistband of your pants in the country club bathroom as you give him a pointed look.
“Not here Rafe.” You say softly as he groans, head on your shoulder.
“We’ve done it here before.” He says in response, lips suckling on your neck as you laugh, gently prying him away from you.
“Yeah, when we weren’t at a business party with your father here.” Rafe then stands to his full height, his jaw ticking and your stomach immediately drops at the quick shift in demeanour.
“My father’s never seemed to bother you before.” He says, referring to the abundant amount of times the two of you have fucked in the house while Ward was just downstairs.
You sigh softly, “We’re at a business party, baby, I promise when we get home-“
Rafe withdraws his hands from you and runs one through his bangs, “Whatever.” He mutters, moving swiftly toward the bathroom door as you reach out for him.
“Rafe, talk to me, what’s wrong?” The boy in question turn his head and rolls his eyes.
“What’s wrong is my girl is more interested in my father than me.” He says simply, shrugging as he goes “I didn’t even wanna fuck anyway, you make it to much work.”
And like a child who’d been refused his favourite toy, Rafe leaves you stood there swallowing the all too familiar lump in your throat.
No, it's back and forth, did I say something wrong?
It's back and forth, goin' over everything I said
It's back and forth, did I do something wrong?
It's back and forth, maybe this is all your fault
Instead it's one step forward and three steps back
Rafe had been giving you the silent treatment since you’d gotten to Tanny hill, only exchanging a grunt in response to you when you placed a kiss to his head as you sat beside him.
Your mind was raking over whatever it is you’d done wrong as you sit on his bed, anxiously waiting for him to come off of the phone to see if he’d talk to you.
You’d be a fool to yourself if you said this wasn’t a regular occurrence, Rafe constantly gave you the silent treatment in response to something.
And then he’d act like you were stupid for thinking such things.
You’re mind couldn’t pin point a thing you’d done wrong nor could it pin point anything you’d said wrong.
You should know by now that this is Rafe’s way, when he’s annoyed at everyone else he takes it out on you. When he doesn’t want to face his own emotions he pushed them onto you so you can face them. Like his own personal punching bag, you should know it’s not your fault yet you feel like it is every time.
When Rafe re emerges from the balcony, he lies down on the bed beside you as you remain sat up trying to find the courage to ask him the question that often leads to him essentially biting your head off.
“Are you mad at me?” You blurt out, turning to look at Rafe who sighs loudly in annoyance.
“Not this shit again.” He groans, rubbing a hand over his face as you fiddle with your fingers.
“I- you just seem quiet today s’all.” You point out and you can predict Rafe’s response before he even says it.
“What? I can’t be quiet now? It’s all good when you wanna be quiet but when it’s me I’m suddenly mad at you?” He asks rhetorically as you shrug half heartedly, avoiding his gaze as he sighs again bringing himself to a sitting position as he places his chin on your shoulder.
“Stop asking me stupid shit, a’ight?” He says and all you can do is nod numbly.
And I'd leave you, but the roller coaster is all I've ever had
As youre walking out of Tanny Hill, face wet with tears due to another screaming match with Rafe, a voice calls out your name from behind you.
You’re quick to wipe your cheeks when you realise it isn’t Rafe, it’s Sarah.
You turn, forcing a smile onto your face as she approaches you, and by the look on her face you know she heard.
“Hey Sare, everything good?” You ask, voice hoarse due to the amount of shouting and crying you’d done.
“I should ask you that, are you okay?” She says softly, brown eyes so kind that your heart nearly breaks to think of how much anger her brother’s blue ones hold.
“You heard, huh?” You ask, watching as she nods, “Look, he- he’s just had a long day and-“
“Y/n, he’s always either had a long day or he’s had a fight with our dad, that doesn’t justify the way he treats you.” She states, deja vu hitting you remembering the similar conversation the two of you had but in that conversation she’d been cautious with what she’d said to you but it was obvious now that caution had gone out of the window.
You stand silently, biting your lip as you look at your former friend “But he loves me.” You whisper, as if that justifies anything.
Sarah’s face breaks out in so much empathy that you swear you can hear both of your hearts break, “Love isn’t supposed to be that hard.” She says and you suck in a harsh breath, “He does love you but…not in the way you deserve.”
Tears roll down your cheeks once more as you respond, “How am I supposed to know what I deserve? I’ve never known anyone else’s love apart from his.”
Sarah immediately brings you into her arms, hugging you so tightly that you have no choice but to let yourself fall into the embrace.
Yeah, it's one step forward and three steps back
Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy
I don't understand
You and Rafe sit silently together at one of Rose’s infamous parties, your eyes trained intently on both Sarah and John B as the Routledge boy pains her around whilst watching her with such a lovesick expression that it makes your stomach churn.
You don’t think Rafe has ever looked at you in such a way.
Not even Ward argued with the fact that Sarah was dating a Pogue, JB was so fiercely in love with his daughter that everyone with eyes could see it. He worshipped the ground she walked on making you come to realisation that Rafe had never been that way with you.
Your head turns to said boy as you speak up, “Do you love me?” You ask, making Rafe slowly turn his head toward you in return, the motion slow due to how high he is.
You don’t think he’s been sober properly since you got together, and you know he won’t be sober any time soon.
You’d helped him in every way you could, he threw it all back into your face.
He needed to figure his shit out for himself now.
“You really asking me stupid shit again?” He asks harshly, yet this time, you don’t waver in your response and you chose to ignore the lump in your throat.
“It’s a simple question, Rafe.” You state calmly, eyes twinkling with such a small amount of hope for whatever thread is hanging on in yours and Rafe’s relationship.
Rafe simply stares at you, as though he can’t bring himself to say the words he’s always eager to say when he wants to get you into bed.
You nod, hope dying out as the thread finally snaps and you unlatch the necklace he’d given you, signifying you breaking free of the prison he’d had you in for over a year.
“I hope you get better Rafe, but I don’t think you’re ever going to do that when you’re with me, I don’t want to be the thing that takes on all your shitty emotions…you need to face them for yourself.” You say, gently prying apart his clenched palm and placing the necklace there before you stand up.
Rafe is quick to follow, calling out for you as you walk away, ignoring the multiple gazes on you and the attention drawn toward you at Rafe’s desperate shouts.
Somewhere in the crowd, Sarah and John B watch with small smiles, happy you’d finally made the first step for yourself.
No, I don't understand
Two weeks later and you’re sat on the front porch at the Chateau, hair flowing softly in the morning breeze as you watch the sunrise.
Rafe had been non stop texting you during the duration of your split, words of love and hatred that you still couldn’t begin to understand no matter how hard you tried.
You did come to the realisation that he’d never even allowed you to understand him, despite how hard you’d tried.
He’d attempted to come to your house but you’d made the wise decision to crash at John B’s, rekindling your friendship with the Pogues as they welcomed you with open arms. Eyes filled with immense guilt for not realising how bad things had gotten with you and Rafe but also with so much love that you’d felt overwhelmed, you didn’t realise such love still existed.
You smile softly to yourself, eyes dancing over the colours coating the sky and you decided things would be okay.
You’d be okay.
#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x reader#rafe obx#rafe outer banks#rafe x you#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron x pogue!reader#outer banks#outer banks pogues#rafe imagine#rafe fic#angst#rafe cameron angst#sarah cameron#john b routledge#jj maybank#olivia rodrigo#sour olivia rodrigo#1 step forward 3 steps back#obx#obx imagine#obx fanfiction
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Let The Light In: Part 6
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7
Words: 1.3K
Pairing: Paige Bueckers/Media Manager! Reader
Warnings: Angst, Friends to enemies to lovers, reader is actually so incredibly in the wrong, slow burn.
A/N: In an absolutely tragic twist of fate I didn't get off work 'till 11 but part 7 is still coming tonight, just needs another read through 😭.
“Go? You question, your eyebrows furrowing in confusion, barely registering a twinge of pain in your chest as you tighten your grip on her waist, refusing to let her leave you just yet.
You catch her gaze, searching for any hint of what she's feeling, but her expression gives nothing away, thoughts well hidden behind a veil of faux indifference.
Paige is obviously in some sort of trance as shakes her head softly, eyes blank, before hastily pulling herself away from your grip and moving to open the door.
You rise from your position to follow, acting like she's your life line, like you'll die if you aren't within arms reach. Your heart pounds deftly in your ears, drowning out the quiet padding of her feet, eyes remaining fixed solely on her as she moves away from you.
'This isn't happening again, this isn't happening again.'
Frantically you speak up, your voice was soft and pleading, “Paige,” desperately wanting her to at least look at you, to give you some kind of answer. “What just happened?” Your words hung in the air, the silence suffocating, until finally, finally, she turns to look at you, eyes filled with guilt.
She freezes under the weight of your gaze, hand still hovering just above the door handle. “I don’t know,” she whispers, voice thick with emotion. “I think I just... I just needed to know how it felt.”
Cautiously, you step towards her, your feelings momentarily forgotten as the vulnerability in her words pulled you closer.
"How what felt? What do you mean?"
“Kissing you,” she whispers, finally looking up from the patterned carpet that covers the hotel floor. Her eyes were red-rimmed, tears threatening to spill over. “I needed to know if I just really wanted it or if I needed it.”
“And?” You held your breath, waiting for her response, hoping against hope.
“I need it,” her voice finally breaks, choking on her tears. “I think I already knew but I just wanted to feel it.”
At this, an unfamiliar combination of relief and sorrow mingle within you, each word that left her lips somehow cutting you deeper than you ever thought possible and simultaneously stitching you up.
"Paige," you began, stepping closer, reaching out to take her hand. “Close the door angel.”
She looks down at where your fingers were now interlaced, the silence stretching between you.
“I can’t do it. Deep down I know you don’t need me like I need you. And I can’t let you back in, I want to but I can’t do that anymore.”
The words hit you like a physical blow, the hope that had been flickering within you threatening to finally - permanently - be snuffed out.
Tears run down her cheeks as she begins to speak again, “this past year has been one of the hardest, most stressful of my life. And this is going to sound so mean but I found a lot of peace in not having to constantly be on my best behavior around you, praying and hoping that eventually you’ll love me back.”
“Paige, please,” you begin, voice breaking, the unexpected creak echoed by the door hinges as she briefly looses her grip on the handle. “I know I messed up, and I know it’s going to take time, but I’m here. I want to fix this. I want to fix us. I know what I’ve done and I want to be better for you? Please. I love you.”
She nods, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I know.”
A heavy silence hung between you, one that's becoming all too familiar. Both refusing to speak up again, caught in a moment that feels both too fragile and too important to break.
'What have I done to us?'
“P, don’t make me leave, don’t push me out again. I won’t say anything you don’t want me to, I won’t do anything you don’t want me to, just let me stay.” You’re begging now, hands reaching out to her, trying desperately to get her to listen to you, to really listen to you.
Paige closes her eyes, her body trembling under the weight of her emotions. And when she opens them again, the veil was lifted, she no longer even trying to hide her sadness. “I can’t." She pauses to take a shaky breath, "I can’t do this right now.”
And, in what can only be described as a moment of pure desperation you move your hands up, frantically taking her face between your palms, pressing your lips to hers once again. Hoping to make whatever magic spell the first kiss had cast on you spread to her.
For an all too brief, but perfect, moment, she kisses you back, hands gripping your wrists as if anchoring herself to you, accidentally giving you permission to trick yourself into thinking that she wants you like this too.
Your heart pounds in your chest as your lips move against hers, the moment seemed to stretch out forever, the physical space between the two of you closing and shrinking to nothing again, again, and again.
You feel the way she holds onto you, and the way she kisses you back, and it feels like a sign of hope. For a moment, everything is going to be okay. When you pull back, you are both breathless, your foreheads pressed together.
But then she pulls away again, her breath ragged, tears flowing freely. “Stop. Please- please, don’t make this harder than it already is.”
'Oh god no.'
The words cut deep, tearing at your heart in ways that you've never felt before.
'This must be what dying feels like.'
“I’m scared, Paige,” you admitted, voice trembling. “I’m scared that if I leave, you won’t ever let me back in again.”
She looks away, her shoulders shaking with silent sobs. “I’m scared too.”
You take a deep, shuddering breath, the weight of her words pressing down on you, all hope officially lost.
If your heart wasn’t already broken, you’re sure it is now, crushed on the floor and beaten black and blue. It’s karma, you suppose, it's what you deserve.
The first time you heard the phrase 'an eye for an eye a tooth for a tooth' was in your 2nd grade history class. At the time, the concept had seemed nothing short of barbaric but now it make perfect sense. You had unknowingly broken Paige's heart a million times over, and if it meant that in the end she might forgive you, then it is time for yours to break too.
“If you need space, I’ll give you space.” You say softly, each word a painful concession, one you desperately don't want to make. “But we need to figure this out. We have a whole season coming up together and we need to make it work.”
“I know.” She repeats, and with one last, lingering look, Paige turns and opens the door further, officially signaling to you that this conversation was done, there's nothing left you can say.
The dim hallway stretched out before you, an unwelcome contrast to the warmth of the room behind you, of the girl behind you.
The walk back to your own room feels like a blur. You are barely conscious as Charlie met you in your hall, arms wrapping around you the second she catches a glance at your heartbroken expression.
“Oh honey what happened?”
You collapse into her embrace, the emotions of the night overwhelming you.
“I told her she loved her, she kissed me, then said she needed space. I don’t know how to fix it, Charlie,” you choke out, voice thick with tears. “I don’t know if I can.”
Charlie pulls back slightly, “you're gonna focus on yourself, on getting through this season, on being the best version of you that you can be. If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. But for now, you need to take care of yourself, okay?”
You let her guide you back to your room, the familiar comfort of her presence helping to steady your racing thoughts.
As you lay in bed, the events of the night replay in a loop in your mind. Paige's tear-streaked face, her trembling voice, the way she had kissed you back but then pulled away—it all swirled together, pressing down on you until you almost aren't sure you'll be able to take it.
Sleep does not come easily. You toss and turn, the heaviness in your chest refusing to dissipate. Every time you close your eyes, you see her, feel her, but it's not real and the longing for it to be gnaws at you relentlessly.
You know Charlie is right; you needed to focus on yourself, on the season ahead, on becoming the best version of you. And, in the stillness of the night, you make a promise to yourself. You will give Paige the space she needs, no matter how much it hurt.
You will work on being better. And you will hold onto the hope that, in time, things will be different. You’ll never let her feel alone again, and if you do that, maybe you’ll never be alone again.
#paige bueckers x reader#paige bueckers#uconn wbb#paige buckets#paige bueckers fic#wcbb#wcbb x reader#wlw#uconn huskies#paige bueckers fanfiction#paige bueckers headcannons#fanfic#angst#wbb#paige bueckers angst
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Read on AO3 | Masterlist | Cabin Fever Masterlist | Join my taglist here!
Summary: You have a surprise for Jake.
Pairings: Jake x Wife!Reader, Josh x Baby, Sam x Danny | Genre: domestic fluff, slight angst | Word Count: 3.7k | Warnings: pregnancy, morning sickness
A/N: I have to throw in a little angst, you know me. But here you go! Jake and Sparrow are having a baby! ♡
Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, you listened to the steady roll of thunder and patter of rain and tried to will yourself into feeling better. So far, it wasn't working very well; rocky and nauseous, there was little you could do but hold your head in your hands and be as still as possible. One wrong move and you'd be down for the count, just like you had been yesterday morning and the morning before that.
You know what that means, a little voice said in your head. You grimaced.
“It’s just the flu,” you said to yourself. “Some weird flu with no other symptoms that only happens in the morning.”
The power of positive thinking seemed to be a useless venture, but you kept it up anyway. You couldn't be pregnant. No way you were ready for that.
There was a knock on the bathroom door, and as you quickly straightened up and made yourself promise that you weren't going to be sick, no matter what, you were reminded of somebody else who wasn't ready for you to be pregnant either. You and Jake hadn't really talked about it — the occasional tipsy proposition to get started having a bunch of little Kiszkas wasn't exactly a serious discussion. Neither of you had pictured it this way, on the cusp of a tour and new album, and you decided to stick with your useless positive thinking for a little bit longer.
“Come in,” you said. Jake made his way in, drowsy and sleep-soft, dressed only in his black boxers and the necklaces he never took off. He looked at you in the mirror as he started to brush his teeth.
“Feel okay, sparrow?” he said around his toothbrush.
You nodded. “Fine. Just don't want to be up this early.”
He hummed in agreement and spit toothpaste into the sink. “You were the one who booked us a flight at the crack of dawn.”
You couldn't deny that. Though Josh and Baby had given you plenty of notice on the date of their son's third birthday party, and though you knew the date by heart because you’d been there the day little John Denver Kiszka was born, you’d procrastinated booking a flight until the early-morning option was the only one. To be fair, you'd had a lot on your mind.
Jake turned on the shower. “You wanna save water and jump in with me?”
You smiled. “I love it when you talk conservation to me.”
He smirked and pulled the shower curtain aside, ushering you in. You felt yourself relax in the quiet morning ritual of showering together, washing each other’s hair and gently bickering over who was getting the most water.
“Can you believe JD is three already?” you asked. His present from the two of you, a pint-sized pirate sword you'd gotten at the ren faire a few weeks ago, was neatly wrapped and packed in your suitcase. “It doesn't seem like it's been three years.”
“Seems like it was only yesterday,” Jake crooned in a teasing voice. “The first baby of the Kiszka-Wagner clan.” He shook his head. “It could be us, sparrow. Can you imagine us with a three-year-old? Holy cow.”
All the tension you’d thought had left quickly made its way back into your body. A nervous hand fluttered to your tummy, somehow worried that a pregnancy that you weren't even convinced was real would show itself.
“It wouldn't be so terrible,” you said weakly.
He smiled and kissed your cheek, turning the shower off and grabbing you a towel. “No, it wouldn't be so terrible. But not right now. Soon, but not right now.”
You felt nauseous again as you toweled off and dressed. You didn't talk much as you both readied to leave, putting your suitcases in the back of the car and patting Gibson, your cat, goodbye. A kind, cat-loving coworker of yours was coming by to feed Gibby while you were gone, but Jake gave him snuggles and kisses like it was the last time they were ever going to see each other.
“You be good,” Jake said, stroking Gibby’s head as he purred like a car engine. “Mama and I love you very very much.”
Some weird, clawing thing stuck in your throat at him calling you “mama” even though he'd always referred to you that way to your cat. You kissed Gibby’s head and went out to the car, taking a few deep breaths as you watched the rain slide down the passenger side window.
“Five-thirty?” Jake groaned as he backed the car out of the driveway. “Sparrow, we gotta get some coffee.”
Your mood was pensive and distant through the drive, checking in at the airport, and boarding the plane. Jake got away with just one request for his picture and signature in the terminal; the girl was wearing a Mirador shirt, and Jake grinned at her promise to get his signature tattooed right where he’d signed it on her arm.
“Never gets old,” he said, slinging his arm over yours as you stood in line to board. “Tell me you like being married to a rockstar.”
You gave him a weak smile. “I like being married to a rockstar.” You did, and you wouldn't trade the constant enjoyment of Jake’s skill and success as a musician. But the rockstar life made some things difficult, and you didn't dare think of what problems would arise if you really were pregnant.
Jake very sweetly gave you the window seat, intending and quickly managing to fall asleep against your shoulder. You looked out at the rainy tarmac and thought of Josh and Baby, two of your dearest friends, people who had not only managed to start a family in the middle of the rockstar life but become very good at it. Their son was the light of their lives, and they'd integrated domestic life into Josh’s whirlwind schedule of recording, touring, and constant limelight with every ounce of joy and patience a couple could ever hope to have. They would help you and Jake, happily, if it turned out that your positive thinking came to naught.
You tried to push the thought out of your head and rest against Jake, readying yourself for a day of summer birthday fun with your family. Your friends and your precious nephew deserved the best version of you, and by the time you pulled up to Josh and Baby’s beautiful old house in Frankenmuth, you were ready to jump right in.
The theme was toddler-friendly life on the high seas, and sweet, colorful, swashbuckling decorations adorned every inch of the house. Coming in, you heard your family in the kitchen and out on the back deck, the sliding door wide open to let dripping, bathing-suited partygoers come back and forth for snacks and popsicles before another splash in the pool.
“Ahoy, mateys!” Jake called, following you as you came into the kitchen. Baby looked up, a bright smile on her pretty face, and abandoned the cubes of watermelon she was spearing with tiny plastic swords.
“You’re here!” she said happily, throwing her arms around you. “Oh, I was worried — Josh said you might have bad weather coming out of Nashville.”
“Just some rain,” you assured her, so relieved to be here with her and the rest of your family. You hugged her back tightly. “How’s the party so far?”
She laughed and gestured to the back yard, accepting an affectionate ruffle of her hair from Jake. “Ready to get started, now that you're here. Have drink, put on your bathing suit, enjoy yourself.”
You went to say hello to your brothers, and JD graciously paused his relentless jumping into Sam’s arms in the pool to hug you and Jake. Dripping wet, his curly hair wreathed with sunshine, he looked up at you and your husband like you’d hung the moon.
“I so happy you're here!” he said gleefully. “Is’ my birthday!”
You smiled and kissed his chubby cheek. “It is! Happy birthday, honey.”
You let him get back to swimming and went to change into your bathing suit. Before long, you were happily drawn into sun-soaked hours of lounging by the pool, talking about everything and nothing with your family. Rosie, who wasn't as spry as she used to be but still patient and amenable to JD’s wet hands mussing her fur, thumped her tail as she lay under the shade of Danny’s chair.
“Sam wants another puppy,” Danny said, taking a long pull from a Corona. “He told his mom we're going to be parents, and she almost lost her shit until she figured out he meant another dog and not a baby.”
Sam planted a kiss on Danny’s forehead. “No babies until we're married, Wagner. I've told you this a hundred times.”
“He’s old fashioned,” Danny agreed, giving you a slightly wistful smile. “But he’s right. We’d have our hands full with a bunch of dogs and a whole entire person.”
“Oh, it’s not so bad,” Josh called from the pool, holding JD as the little boy paddled and splashed and giggled. “You should go for it. All of you. Me and Baby feel kinda left out being the only ones with bedtimes at seven-thirty.”
Jake laughed. “No thanks. I've still got some partying years in me.”
Your throat felt tight. “Maybe partying’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
“Speak for yourself,” Sam teased.
Baby seemed to notice something was off with you, and she put her hand over yours.
“Will you come help me get some stuff from the kitchen?” she asked.
You went with her willingly, needing a break from the sun and the harmless teasing that seemed to twist like a knife in you. You took the Capri-suns and sub sliders from the fridge as she mixed a pitcher of what was appropriately labeled “Jack Sparrow’s missing rum punch”.
“You want some?” she asked.
You bit your lip. “Better not.”
She poured herself a drink and joined you at the counter where you half-heartedly put pirate-sail toothpicks in the sandwiches.
“All the decorations came out really cute,” you said, meaning it despite your quiet tone.
She smiled. “Thanks, sparrow. You know Jake’s had JD into pirates since the day he was born, and now that he's finally old enough to enjoy it, I figured it was time to pull out all the stops.”
She brushed your hair back from your face. “Sparrow... are you pregnant?”
You felt a vivid blush rise to your face. Was it pinned to your dress like a scarlet letter? But meeting her eyes, seeing sympathy and understanding there, you slowly nodded.
“I think so,” you all but whispered. “I — I haven't taken a test. I don't know for sure.”
“But your period’s late?” she asked calmly.
“And I've been having morning sickness,” you managed. “It — I mean, it could be the flu, but —”
She laughed, but it wasn't unkind.
“It’s probably not the flu, honey.” She squeezed your hand. “I have a test in the bathroom if you want to take it.”
You were surprised. “Are you pregnant?”
She shrugged. “Not at the moment. I’m not planning on it, but...” She gave you a wry smile. “Sometimes these things happen, sparrow. It’s not the end of the world. It might actually be the start of something really wonderful for you and Jake.”
You felt the sting of tears. “I haven't said anything to him. I didn't want to if I wasn't sure. I don't know if he’ll...” Tears spilled over. “If he’ll be happy.”
“Of course he’ll be happy,” she said, and it was so confident and so sure that you felt a buoying of hope. “He’ll be over the freakin’ moon, sparrow. Don't let all this nostalgia for partying get to you. Josh was happy when we found out we were having JD, and Jake will be happy if you find out you're having a baby too.”
You swallowed. “You think so?”
She smiled and brushed the tears from your face. “Yeah, I think so. Go find out if you are.”
You did as she said, finding the Clearblue test under the sink. Waiting was agonizing; you forced yourself to wait longer than you were supposed to, not sure if you could bear it, whatever the result was. You wanted a baby with Jake; nothing would give you more pleasure than to make him a father, to start a family with the man you loved. But was he ready? Were you ready?
Finally, you looked at the test. There, in little black letters: pregnant.
A gasping sort of sob escaped you. You clapped a hand over your mouth and sank to the floor, holding the test in shaking fingers, reading it over and over. Pregnant. You and Jake were having a baby.
You cried, but whether they were happy tears or just a sign of how overwhelmed you were, you couldn’t tell. Sitting on your best friends’ bathroom floor, you watched your tears blur that one little word that would change everything.
Eventually, you collected yourself enough to wash your face at the sink and tuck the test in the pocket of your sundress. You ventured out to the back porch and found your family in a safe, comforting chaos; Baby and Danny were swimming with JD, and the twins were soundly beating Sam in garbage.
Jake looked up as you came out, a handsome smile lighting his face. “Hi, sweetheart. You wanna play the next hand?”
You looked over at Baby, and she grinned when you gave her a little smile. She nodded towards Jake, urging you to tell him.
“Um...” You twisted the fabric of your dress in nervous fingers. “Actually, can I talk to you for a second?”
“Sure. Let me just...” He laid out his cards and was met with groans from his brothers, and he smirked. “Read it and weep, fellas.”
Josh gathered up the cards to be dealt again, and Jake was careful of the empty beer bottles on the table as he stood and came inside with you. He was a little tipsy, his piratey swagger giving it away more than anything else, sun-kissed and smiley and so beautiful to you that you thought you would never get tired of just looking at him. Would your baby look like him? You hoped so, and it was the promise of another someone like Jake Kiszka in the world that made you brave enough to speak.
“I need to tell you something,” you said, your voice a little wobbly.
He pulled you close and gave you a kiss. “Don’t tell me. You want to ravish me.”
You gave a soft laugh. “Not exactly.” You led him to the guest bedroom, though, wanting it to be just the two of you with no one walking in accidentally.
“This is... not convincing,” he teased when you closed the door behind you. “I guess you’re feeling better than you were this morning, huh?”
You were, but the reason wasn't what he thought. Now that you knew, now that you were sure and had the confidence and encouragement of your best friend, you were feeling much better. Now you just needed Jake to tell you it would be alright.
“I think I might not be... over that,” you said cautiously. “Like, it might be a recurring thing. Every morning.”
He frowned, searching your face. “What do you mean? Is something wrong?”
You shook your head. “Nope. Nothing's wrong.”
“What is it, then?”
You pulled the test out of your pocket and handed it to him. “Um... I think that’s what it is.”
You waited for him to speak, to do anything, but he just looked at it in silence, cradled in the palm of his hand. Then, after a moment, he looked up at you.
“Are you serious?”
You couldn’t read his tone. Shock, surprise, maybe a little fear, something you hoped was excitement — all of them bled into the color of his voice.
“I'm serious,” you said, starting to feel like you were going to cry again. “I just took it. It's... I mean, it's pretty clear.”
He closed his hand around the test. Almost like he’d taken a blow, he stepped back and sat on the edge of the bed.
Your heart dropped right to the floor when he hid behind his free hand, leaning over his knees. Tears blurred your vision.
“I know it’s not the best time,” you said, desperate for some kind of reassurance. You came close to him. “But I think if we — if —” You didn't know what to say. “I think we can do it, Jake. I think we can have this baby.”
He lifted his head and met your eyes, a big, bright smile shining through a tearful haze.
“You’re really pregnant?” he asked, and it was all joy.
You all but collapsed against him then, putting your arms around his neck, holding him as he tested your head against your tummy. He put his arms around you and held you close, caught somewhere between laughing and crying.
“I’m really pregnant,” you said softly. “Jake, are you happy?”
He stood and spun you around, exultant, laughing like a little boy on Christmas morning.
“Yes, I'm happy!” He stopped spinning you to kiss you, sweet and messy and so in love with you. “Are you crazy, sparrow? I've never been so happy in my whole life!”
You looked up at him with your heart in your eyes. “You don't think it's a bad time?”
He hushed you with another kiss. “No way. It's the perfect time. Forget everything I ever said about it being a bad time.” His smile was so big and beautiful. “I can't believe we're having a baby, sparrow. You're gonna be such a good mom. I love you, and I'm so proud of you. I love you so much.”
“Oh, Jake,” you said gently. “I love you too.”
He held you close and you melted against him, safe, loved, so happy you were delirious with it. You were having a baby! It sang in every part of you, and you joined in his joyful tears and watery laughter.
“Let’s go tell everybody,” he said, taking your hand. “You want to?”
You nodded, feeling that you'd never been more in love with him than you were just then.
He led you back out to the porch and tried to keep the suspense up as your family watched your giddy, excited entrance. Everyone was sitting at the table now, JD fast asleep on Josh’s lap; Jake was grinning to beat the sun, bright and shining with pride and contagious joy as the two of you stood before the people you loved.
“I don't mean to steal the little man’s thunder,” Jake said, looking with heart-rending tenderness at his brother and his baby. “This a great birthday for a great little guy. But...” He looked to you, and you gave his hand and encouraging squeeze.
“Well, I guess we’ll be planning another birthday party soon,” Jake said, the words fairly bursting out, “because... we're having a baby!”
Your family erupted into a wonderful cacophony shocked questions and joyful hollering, chairs protesting as they were pushed back, pirate decorations toppling on the tabletop as you and Jake were surrounded with hugs and kisses and congratulations. JD woke, a little uneasy at all the happy noise, and Josh cuddled him close with a beaming smile and told him he was going to have a cousin very soon.
“Oh,” was all the little boy said, one hand tangled in Josh’s shirt as he looked on the gathering with a bleary smile.
Baby fairly tackled you, telling you how much she loved you, how happy she was for you. You stood in the circle of your family and couldn't help a few tears, but they were nothing but happy now.
After the boys reined in their joyful rowdiness and you had been hugged so many times you felt the pressure of love on you like a warm blanket, it was time for cake and presents and celebration of the first little Kiszka your family had been blessed with. JD loved all his presents, running around in his too-big pirate outfit from Sam and Danny and waving the sword you and Jake had gotten him, and the adults settled at the table to enjoy each other's company. In the light of the setting sun, sun-flushed cheeks sore from smiling and music playing and drinks flowing, you family was as beautiful to you as they had ever been.
Jake patted his lap, and you squeezed with him in the chair and welcomed his protective, loving arms around you.
“So, what are we naming this baby?” Sam asked, dealing out a hand of cards. “Jake junior?”
“Jack Sparrow,” Josh offered.
You laughed. “Maybe. I think it’ll be a girl, though.”
Jake looked up at you. “You know already?”
You kissed him. “Not officially, honey. I didn't mean to get you all excited. But... I don't know. I can feel it.”
Baby nodded as she gathered her cards. “I could tell with JD. Sometimes you just know.”
“It should be a bird name,” Danny suggested. “Since you guys are into that sort of thing.”
Jake smiled. “Yeah, it should.” His hand rested on your tummy, and you put your hands over his. “What about Robin?”
The name washed over you with a special kind of peace. “Okay,” you said softly. “Sparrow and her Jake-bird and their little Robin.”
Your family cooed over the name as you gave Jake a gentle kiss, and you knew it was perfect for your little girl.
Cake was eaten, drinks topped off, and music cranked up until it was well and truly a party. JD, with all the enthusiasm he could muster while falling asleep on Danny’s lap, joined in the various cheers and groans as you played cards together. You couldn't wait until you had another little Kiszka to join the party — your Robin would be around five months old at JD’s next birthday bash, and maybe there would even be another Kiszka-Wagner baby on the way. For now, though, everything was perfect, and you rested in it as you spent time with the ones you loved.
Jake pressed a kiss to your shoulder.
“I love you, sparrow,” he said gently, just for you. “And I love our little bird.”
You touched his cheek and drew him up to kiss your properly, loving the feel of his smile.
“Jakey,” you said softly. “We love you too.”
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THE IUDEX CANNOT FORGET — NEUVILLETTE
⋆｡˚ ❀ prompt: "don't ask me to forget last night. in my heart laid a map of your body" by delilahfairchild
⋆｡˚ ❀ contents: implied smut, fluff but bittersweet
⋆｡˚ ❀ wc: 1.5k
⋆｡˚ ❀ a/n: loosely based on the dialogue prompt above! i saw it and immediately thought of neuvi c: writing this made me so soft for him ahh pls enjoy!! xo
Amidst the stupor of the night was when poor decisions appeared to be good.
Add in the mixture of wine from a celebratory evening out and you felt just about invincible. The mere thought of any consequence seemed so far away from you.
But the moment you woke up with a throbbing headache and lack of clothes, you knew the consequences would catch up to you.
You stilled as you noticed the plush, royal blue sheets you laid in. It was all too familiar, yet experiencing it in such a way was foreign to you. Turning your head cautiously, you spotted a sleeping Neuvillette who looked completely unbothered in blissful unconsciousness.
Gravely, you examined his peaceful figure, savoring the last few moments of normalcy before your relationship was likely to change forever.
As you took one last look at the slow rise and fall of his bare chest, you slipped out of the bed to gather your clothes—all strewn around across the room. You felt the heat rise to your cheeks at the memory of exactly how your clothes came to be on the floor in such a way. For such a gentle soul, Neuvillette sure surprised you in that department.
Once you located your undergarments and began to clothe yourself, you felt guilt flood through your body. Guilt from the events of last night, guilt at the act of you leaving in the morning without a word…
“Heading out so soon?”
You jumped, your dress falling from your hands and back onto the carpeted floor.
“Neuvillette! You’re awake.”
He sat up slightly in his bed, exposing the toned muscles of his torso out for anyone to see. Tilting his head to the side, he said, “Your tone informs me you are not pleased with the situation. Shall I pretend to continue being asleep?”
Shaking your head, you hastily pulled your dress up from your feet, slipping your arms through the bellowing sleeves. “No, of course not.” You shut your eyes. “I just didn’t expect to have to talk about this so suddenly.”
Neuvillette didn’t say a word, instead staring expectantly at you.
“About last night—“ you began hastily, fingers tugging at the loose fabric of your dress. “You are one of my dearest friends, and I, yours. And we were both intoxicated. And—”
“If you are about to ask me to forget last night, please, stop.”
His voice was filled with such sorrow that you forced yourself to look up at him. With a morose, yet understanding look in his eyes, you were hit with the realization that this likely wasn’t the first time he went through something like this. Despite his preference towards solitude, you knew his heart was kind enough to let people in, no matter how hard he tried not to let it be the case. Throughout his many, many years of life, he must have experienced a multitude of love and loss.
And that only reminded you just why last night had to be a mistake.
As if reading the expression on your face, Neuvillette spoke once more. “You may wish to erase the memory we made together, but painted in my heart is a map of your body. I am uncertain if I would be able to comply with your wishes.”
You held your breath, grip tightening around your dress as your stomach churned. Feeling the wrinkles beneath your palms, you sighed. You would certainly need to get your outfit dry cleaned after this.
“Neuvillette, I don’t want to forget last night, either,” you said, breathless. How could you forget, even if you wanted? The feeling of Neuvillette’s hot breath against your neck, the image of his sculpted figure that could somehow be so gentle when it touched you. Those moments were etched into your memory, too. “But what if it is for the best?”
“How could it possibly be so?”
“You’re immortal, for one. I am not.”
Truly, that was the bulk of it. You could have stopped there. What reason could be more potent than this? You were a human, with a lifespan limited by health, illness, aging. He was the Sovereign Dragon on Fontaine. If you friendship turned into something more, then the attachment would only grow. And when the time came for you to part with Teyvat, a storm was certain to come to the land.
“I am not immortal,” he corrected. “I have reincarnated.”
You looked at him helplessly. “And I have not. I will not. We’re good as friends—amazing even. If we stay this way, it’ll be easier on the both of us.”
Neuvillette rose from his position in bed, slipping on a silken robe before walking over to you. Slowly, he approached, placing his hand on your cheek and you sucked in a sharp breath at the cold touch.
“The easiest way does not always mean the best,” he said, softly stroking the high point of your cheekbone. “I would rather spend a life being able to hold you, kiss you, love you, until the last moments, rather than living in regret.”
You squeezed your eyes shut, allowing yourself to melt into his touch. “But then when those last moments come, and it is inevitable that they will… What then? I do not want you to suffer—to feel anymore loss and sadness.”
“I have grown to accept that it is part of life, no matter how long or short we live for. Loss is a constant.”
You let out a breathless laughter, feeling almost hopeless. “Is that supposed to make it any better?”
Neuvillette gazed fondly down at you, hand falling from your face to trace its way down your arm. You found your own hand finding its place in his, and you hoped he would never let go.
“It does not make it better,” he said solemnly. “Loss is still painful, no matter how many times it occurs. Still, we cannot let that stop us from living our lives.”
He drew closer to you, so close you could almost feel the warmth radiating from his core. You held your breath and peered up at him.
“I, for one, believe experiencing moments such as last night with you, and those like it to come, is worth the crushing pain of it all coming to an end,” he declared. At the look on your face, he placed a chaste kiss on your forehead. “Still, I cannot decide for you.” He took a step back. “If you wish to not go further in our relationship, I will respect that. I can never forget how you looked, how you felt, as you laid underneath me. But for your sake, I will not speak of it again if that is the what you so desire—”
“No!” you cried out, tearing your hand from his to hold his face gently between your palms. “That is not what I desire. I wish to have more moments such as last night with you. I wish to grow old and experience life with you. Still, I just wish I could always be there for you.”
Resting his forehead against yours, Neuvillette sighed solemnly. “I know, mon coeur. There are days I wish the same, but until that is a possibility, please know that you will always have my heart.”
You nodded, pressing your lips against his. You felt relief overcome his body as he returned your kiss. He enveloped you in a warm embrace, hands cupped around your waist as he nipped at your lower lip. Your hands that rested on his face made their way to the back of his neck, only deepening your connection.
As you pulled away for air, you managed a quiet, “Thank you.”
“What for?” he asked, brushing aside the hair that fell across your face.
“For one, not getting mad at me for trying to sneak out and pretend nothing happened,” you said sheepishly, looking down in shame. “I am truly sorry. I really thought it would be the best thing for both of us… But it’s not.”
Neuvillette gently pinched your cheek, hints of humor in his eyes. “Indeed, it is not. And while I may not be mad, a punishment has yet to be doled out.”
“The Chief Justice’s work is never done,” you said with a nervous laugh, wondering just what type of punishment he could be speaking of.
“We deal with that later tonight,” he said firmly, giving you a gentle squeeze. “For now, we celebrate the evolution of our relationship.”
“Here’s to the rest of my life that I now have the honor of spending with you.”
“The honor is all mine, mon coeur.” Neuvillette held your hand in his, placing another chaste kiss on lips. “Thank you for choosing me in this lifetime.”
#neuvillette x reader#genshin x reader#neuvillette x you#neuvillette x y/n#genshin impact x reader#genshin imagines#neuvillette
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Celandine (c.b. one-shot)
♡ Chapter Inspo: Celandine - Cures depression, brings victory and joy. Serves as a protective ward when worn. Carry to increase self-confidence when facing adversaries. Use in ritual work when you feel trapped in undue negativity.
♡ Summary: You are feeling a bit blue about your body PP, Carmy takes it upon himself to show you just how beautiful you are! :) <3
♡ W/C: 1.2K+
♡ Posted Date: 05/27/2024
♡ A/N: Hello! Happy day 2/7 of the Capri 200 Follower Celebration Extravaganza!!! You can find said extravaganza ♡ Here ♡ this celebration will be going until next Sunday (06/02/24) so get your requests in! Here's another celebration ask on the books! This ask is from lovely @jesscolon529 I hope you enjoy, my darling!
♡ Warnings for BTC: Speaking of pregnancy, Fem/AFAB!reader, No use of y/n, feelings of self hate / insecurity, sad reader, comforting carmy, established relationship, not edited, Pics are just vibes, reader isn't described!! Established relationship
♡ 𝐌𝐲 𝐋𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 ♡
➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 ♡
➵ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞-𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐠𝐞 ♡
➵ 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘬 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 / 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘵 ♡
➵ 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬 ♡
It had been 12 weeks since you’d delivered you and Carmy’s first baby, and your postpartum depression was in full effect. It really had not much to do with your baby, and everything to do with you. You felt gross after you delivered, you barely even wanted Carmy to look at you which he took like a stab in the heart.
When you came home, it wasn’t really different. Even though showering was…very painful, and you could really use the help and would appreciate that help very much - you couldn’t accept it. The idea of your husband seeing your naked body that you considered to be mangled and gross brought tears to your eyes. The idea of him watching blood run down the drain as you carefully rinsed your mangled bits he used to devour nearly every night made you want to throw up.
There was still a tiny part of you that believed he did this to you, so he shouldn’t be upset with the result - but somehow that just made you more angry because what if he was upset with how your body looked now, and just wasn’t saying anything? And how dare he not like your body after all you’ve done for him, for your family?!
You were stood in front of the full length mirror in the bedroom after you showered, observing yourself. You could have sex how, if you wanted. But you had convinced yourself you’d never let Carmy see you naked again in fear he would shriek and cover his eyes and run away, a bit dramatic - but still you couldn’t face the idea of your husband not loving you anymore because he saw what left you have to give after 9 months of hell.
You touch your now jiggly, wrinkly belly, pulling the skin back with your hands and sighing a bit, remembering how you used to look. Tears welled in your eyes, “you’re so fucking vain” you whispered in the mirror.
“Baby?” Carmy nudged the door open and you shout
“JESUS CHRIST!!! IM CHANGING! Shut the door Carmen!”
He jumps a bit at your sudden outburst, a frown coming to his features “why?” He asked and shut the door behind him. You quickly grabbed your shirt, sliding it over your head and pulling it out so it wouldn’t rest over your belly.
“Cause- cause I deserve privacy?” You snap, angry that he wasn’t just running away like you’d expected him - or wanted him to.
“Privacy? From…y’husband?” He comes over and rubs your arms gently “baby- are you gonna tell me wha’s up?” He asked.
Your lip wobbled, more tears coming to your eyes. You shook your head quickly and looked at the floor, squeezing your eyes shut and hot, thick, shameful tears roll down your cheeks. “I’m ruined now” you said, your voice watery and defeated.
“What?” He wiped your tears and hugged you, rubbing your back “baby what’s been goin on? You haven’t let me see you in months. I miss you, y’know that, right?” He kissed the top of your head as you sniffle in to his shirt
“I- I’m ugly now an-and wrinkly and covered in stretch marks and- and all…different down there. What if you stop loving me?” You burst into sobs. He could barely contain the lump growing in his own throat as he hushed you and rubbed soothing circles into your back.
“Princess” he said his voice cracking a bit and he led you to the bed, sitting and pulling you into his lap “I could never stop loving you. I would have to be warm and dead to stop loving you. Y’hear me? You, and little dude, are the only things in this world that matter t’me…and maybe the restaurant…but-“ he said, just to bring a tiny smile to your lips
“Mmm? See there’s that smile” he wipes your tears “what’s been bugging you baby, show me. I promise, I love every bit of you, I love you more every day- I still don’t know how that’s possible, but you make it work somehow” he teased and you blush, hiding your teary cheeks in the crook of his neck as he rubbed your back and side soothingly.
“You say that but what if you see me and you can’t help it” you sniffled a bit.
“Not possible honey” he countered. “Cmon- tell me. What’s been buggin you?”
“My belly. And - and my thighs are so big now. My belly is all…ugh. Wrinkly and has all these red marks on it. And my bellybutton looks all weird” you whine
“This belly?” He rubs his palm over it “the belly that kept our son all warm and happy n’safe till it was time f’him t’come home?” He asked and you huff
“Yes but..it’s not…normal anymore” you said and he hums in agreement.
“Y’right, it’s better, it’s new, it’s gonna take you some gettin’ used to- but I love it. Can I tell y’somethin and y’promise not t’be mad?” He asked and cuddled you into him more, kissing your cheek and hairline, wherever he could reach.
“Mm” you hummed, sniffling softly
“Your body now is the most beautiful it has ever been. Because it’s yours. It’s my wife’s body, my beautiful Mrs.Berzatto, it’s your belly, and your thighs, and your new different pussy you’re so afraid of” he said playfully in your ear to which you giggle a bit, cupping his cheek and looking at him with tear rimmed eyes.
“Y’not just lying to make me feel better?” You asked and he shook his head
“Nope- all the truth babygirl. Why would I lie t’my best girl mm? My only girl” he kissed your lips gently and rubbed your hip over.
“And - and you really like it?” You pouted
He raised his brows in the ‘are you fucking with me’ Carmy way, “want me to show you?” He asked and you felt heat in your cheeks, looking down shyly. “Okay-“ he laid you back on the bed carefully, pushing up your shirt. “I think-“ he starts kissing from your ribs, over your sternum, down, down, over your belly, making it a point to kiss each little dimple and mark
“I fed you and little boy sooo good while you were pregnant, so these? You can blame me. But I love them as selfish as it makes me” he kissed over your hips. “And these” he squeezed them with his hands “mmm fuck I looove these- I can’t wait to hold these while I’m fuckin’ you mm?” He traveled his hands up your waist, squeezing gently and continuing to ravish you in kisses.
“And these” he gently squeezed your breasts together in your nursing bra “are fucking amazing. And a literal life source for our boy. An’he’s growin so well. He’s in the 95th percentile, he’s so healthy, and chunky. Y’doin amazing babe.” He cups your cheeks.
“The most important thing though baby is you. You’re still my beautiful, kind, thoughtful wife. And I wouldn’t change anything about you, not a single fuckin’ thing, hear me?” He kisses you deeply.
You felt more tears running down your cheeks, but it wasn’t fear or sadness this time that brought them,
It was gratitude.
#Capri 200 follower celebration#carmen berzatto imagine#carmen berzatto blurb#carmen berzatto fluff#carmen berzatto smut#carmen berzatto x reader#Carmen Berzatto x fem!reader#Carmen Berzatto x you#carmen berzatto x female reader#Carmen Berzatto one shot#Carmen Berzatto drabble#carmy berzatto#carmen berzatto#carmy the bear#carmy berzatto fic#carmy berzatto imagine#carmy berzatto smut#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto x fem reader#carmy berzatto x female reader#carmy berzatto x you#carmy berzatto blurb#carmy berzatto x oc#the bear fx#the bear#the bear fic#the bear hulu#the bear fanfiction#carmen berzatto fanfiction#carmy berzatto fanfiction
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