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damnfandomproblems · 3 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/damnfandomproblems/739064506502791168/fandom-problem-4499-i-think-sometimes-people-get

Thing is op

People like to use "coded" as an excuse to harrass others over a fictional character

"this character is minor-coded therefor if you like them or draw them sexy then you are a pedo"

"this character is gay-coded so if you ship them qith the opposite gender your homophobic"

"this character is autism-coded so if you dont see them that way you are ableist."

"this character is poc coded and if you dont portray them that way then you are racist"

And then they go and rip people to shreds over it. And most of the time they are actually "coded" as anything.

Ill give you a good example as to why coding should just fucking die in fandom.

In transformers (all of them afaik) there is a sentient ROBOT named Jazz. He is often voiced by a black voice actor, even in the early days of Generation 1 in 1984. Though it changes a few times Jazz is well known for his accented voice. Jazz (the music) is also known to be pioneered by black people.

In a way jazz is black coded. He is designed with all these elements related to black people.

The thing is. Jazz is a fucking robot. "Jazz" is the name he chose for himself because his cybertronian name does not translate or cannot be spoken by humans. Jazz is also a type of music he only heard when he arrived on earth and is something he loves, hence why he chose the name. He chooses to express himself in such a way because its what he enjoys.

It does not mean he is black. A white person can do all that because they have a love for jazz music. It isnt going to make them "black coded"

He is also again, a robot. Not human. Not even organic.

However of all the problems ive seen in the TF fandom the one about whether you should draw a human version of Jazz as black or white is probably the one thats sets people who give a shit off the most.

It doesn't matter what characteristics a character has. It doesnt matter if Jazz is drawn as black or white. Cuz he isn't human. Its literally up to fan interpretation and none of them are wrong but people want to shit fling, and react hostile over others not drawing him as black anyway.

Same could be said about a certain more popular pink skinned character (who is also human and japanese but when have people ever viewed japanese people as important.)

You can have your queer coded villains. Doesn't actually say they are queer. Hell in the past it would be done as a way to demonize queerness and traits. But queer people still loved those villains because they could relate to their tragedies.

What "coding" actually is, is a part of the design process to add depth and character. It's an inspiration born from reality. But it's not always that the character is meant to be that thing.

Theres a character from genshin impact i could say is "DID-coded" because when she falls alseep or is so stressed she passes out there is another version of her that takes her place that she doesnt know about.

In the same vein theres the game "At Dead of Night" (recommend it, its a horror game) where the main antagonist is possessed and murders people. They even had to put a disclaimer that the character didnt have DID and the game wasnt made to demonize people with DID or portray them as unstable serial killers. However despite the creators saying that, fans still "DID-code" the antagonist, not out of hatred for people with DID but because some people with DID still relate to the character. Not so much the killing people but the struggle the antagonist has with "being possessed". Having DID can be a frustrating and tiring experience and not many cope with it very well even when they do no harm. Feeling of loss of control is very relatable even without DID.

Regardless the rampant "coding everything trend" in fandom has caused a new "ship war" like wave of harrassment. If you dont view a character this was your a horrible person and you deserve *insert graphic content and threats of harm and suibaiting and more*

coding can be a cool thing to discover while analyzing a character or even creating one. But its become hated with good reason because people have no reason left in them. Coding is a cool way of adding depth and nuance to a character and would actually REALLY help beginners with their "bland" characters. Unfortunately even thats discouraged, since it can be seen as "baiting" or "stereotyping" and sometimes appropriating culture. (But a giant sentient robot making his entire personality about jazz music isn't? Lol)

Posting since this is a response to a previous problem.

#fandom problem 4499 #response to previous problem

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frankingsteinery · 22 days

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(for the ask game from a few days ago) could you do Victor for 2, 12, 15 and 24

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

i had to sit and think because this one was so hard to narrow down. on a surface level i find all sorts of things about him endearing from his mannerisms to his speech patterns, but i think the thing that got me hooked on victor as a character was how emotionally demonstrative he is, particularly for a male protagonist. this also extends generally to his love for nature, for his friends, and his siblings (disregarding the incestuous implications of his relationship with elizabeth...)

i think this was only intensified for me when i started delving into frankenstein academic essays and analysis and then, by extension, the frankenstein fandom, and found that en masse it was people criticizing victor for just what interested me to him in the first place: being emotional, and therefore somehow melodramatic, overreacting, self-centered, egotistical, etc. it was this kind of climate of victor-hate that pushed me to make a tumblr account in the first place. someone had to be the sole victor defender in this barren wasteland

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

this is silly and probably not the serious answer you were looking for but like 2 years ago a dear friend of mine and i were joking about how you could catch victor frankenstein in a mouse trap and ever since then his assigned fursona in my head has been a mouse:

15. What's your favorite ship for this character?

by far its waltonstein (robert x victor). im aware clervalstein is vastly more popular, and while im charmed by it in-canon i dont find most depictions of it to my taste. i don't see their relationship as wholly reciprocated–one-sided on walton's end–which is part of the reason why i like their dynamic so much: its established that walton romanticizes the unobtainable, chases the unknown, and that's why he hangs all his hopes on things he cannot feasibly reach. first becoming a famous poet and going down with the greats, then sailing to find the northern passage despite being an inexperienced captain, all the while hoping for this impossibly idealistic image of a companion who would be perfectly tailored to his interests and manners, and then, against all reason, he finds this in victor, wherein victor becomes an extension of this habit, who is dying and too hung up in the past and on martyring himself, because everyone who has grown close to him has been hurt for it, so he cannot love again, or at least in the way walton wants. yet victor still has a reciprocated interest and finds a friend in him, even shares the same sentiment of the importance of friendship, but like he says no man can "be to him as clerval was." its very much wrong place/time but the right person.

ive said this before but i think, too, that if victor had recovered and lived than walton may fall a little less in love with victor. their relationship was founded on their dynamic of sick/caretaker, and beyond that, victor would have already exhausted his story, so there's no air of mystery around him anymore–nothing for walton to glorify or romanticize. ultimately i think even if they had the best of intentions and loved each other, they could not have a healthy or fully mutual relationship, and part of the appeal to me is this tragedy!

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

im drawing a bit of a blank on this one because no other character encompasses just what victor Is to me, but theres a whole host of victor-esque characters i could name because he is the literal foundation for the mad scientist archetype. if i was pressed i think id say geoffrey tempest from sorrows of satan by marie corelli (beyond his blatant misogny), and i remember some parts of emil sinclairs early narration in demian by herman hesse reminded me of victor. lucifer/satan from paradise lost also, particuarly the bit where he says he cannot enjoy the beauty of earth for the suffering of his fall, but that almost feels like a cop-out answer.

lastly–and this one is completely unfounded–itd have to be double dee from EEnE.

#rob.txt #frankenstein #frankenstein the modern prometheus #victor frankenstein #gothic lit #asks

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acourtofthought · 3 months

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Hi I was wondering if you still think eluciens book is next after hofas?

Even after HOFAS, I still think Elucien's book is next especially because as of HOFAS, Az still does not seem to give credit where credit is due in terms of Elain.

SJM gave Chaol a book but not at the expense of Aelin finding the person with whom she was meant for.

I like Chaol very much but I don't think it can be denied that he was unable to truly embrace Celaena for everything she was. Dorian once said to him that he didn't get to pick the parts of her that he loved and it was true. He struggled with thinking she was assassinating people at the Kings orders though that is what she was hired to do. He struggled once he found out she had magic. He struggled once he found out she was really Aelin.

So imagine if SJM gave Chaol his HEA with Yrene before Aelin fell in love with Rowan? It would send the message that "hey, it's cool you had prejudices and here's your reward in Yrene!"

People in the fandom go gaga over Az. They either moon over his interactions with Elain or over his interactions with Gwyn.

But his attitude towards both Elain and Lucien often gets swept under the rug unless it's being addressed in a post trying to prove why he and Elain aren't endgame. There's a sense of "he doesn't respect Elain and therefore will not end up with her" and then many move right on to how he and Gwyn would be great for one another while completely skipping over the fact that he probably needs to learn a lesson or two before that ever happens.

It would be like SJM giving Tamlin his HEA with someone before Feyre ended up with Rhys. Or Tamlin getting his HEA before Lucien.

I'm not saying Az is exactly like Tamlin but there are similarities there and I think it's odd that we would all probably agree Tamlin should not have gotten his HEA before Feyre or get one before Lucien because of the way he treated them while some believe Az, with the way he acts towards Elain and treats Lucien, should get his HEA before them.

Az's behavior is problematic but many want to turn a blind eye, believing that as long as he is with Gwyn, he'll be a better male.

To me, Az's true growth will not ring as true until he sees that Lucien is in fact good enough for Elain, that she does in fact have interest in him, that Elain and Lucien are in fact just as powerful and capable of Az himself and him feeling happy for them, him being able to acknowledge he was wrong.

Az finding his mate in the next ACOTAR book and him suddenly being gracious as a result is not a lesson learned. "I got my mate so now I can admit you're a good guy Lucien, sorry about that."

It rings insincere. I think that as we just got the first hints of a Gwynriel mating bond introduced in SF, it's not crazy to think that SJM will give their story a little more time to cook while Elucien's mating bond is first dealt with.

Beyond that, I don't think a Gwynriel book at this time moves the plot forward with Koschei, Beron, Tamlin, Vassa, or the peace treaty.

Suddenly drawing the current "villains" into Night Court territory drama with the Illyrians, the Valkyrie or the Prison lands doesn't make a lot of sense to me because then, Elucien's story would be set in the NC.

I think it's clear that the current main issues in their world exist outside the NC borders.

Beron wants Spring lands and the NC needs Springs armies as an ally yet Tamlin isn't getting better.

Koschei wants to free himself of the lake to become master of their world (not just one territory).

The fae in Vallahan want to move into human territory.

Vassa's curse takes her back to Koschei's lake on the continent.

The Valkyries and the Illyrians have nothing to do with these plots. People claim that Koschei is connected to the Illyrians because of the Rite but that was Briallyn's plot for Nesta because she needed to wear Nesta's powers down. "Your power is too strong - throwing you into this primitive spectacle wore you down". It really had nothing to do with the Illyrians themselves.

I also don't believe that SJM is going to heavily tie Merrill and time travel into what's going on across the continent and Spring. I think SJM laid the groundwork for her future series which I imagine will deal with more crossover plots, Merrill as a villain and world walking but the Valkyrie storyline which consists of building up an entire legion of elite female warriors is not something I see happening within the same year that the idea of the Valkyrie being reborn took place. And there's no point in suddenly tying the Valkyrie / Illyrians to Koschei and the peace treaty in a single book when we know Elucien's book will not take place in the NC. It makes no sense for SJM to turn Beron's attention to the NC when Rhys remains the most powerful HL and could easily wipe Beron off the map if he dares to enter NC territory. The reason Beron is looking to Spring is because of it's weakened state.

I once called it a marble run but SJM recently used the airplane taxiing metaphor.

Yes, Gwyn talked of wanting to leave the library but Vassa has been trying to free herself from her curse for much longer.

Yes, Gwyn and Az have both been given mysterious backgrounds but both Lucien and Elain have had unexplored powers and Lucien's still hasn't learned of his real father for a much longer time.

Yes, Gwynriel had the first hints of their mating bond established but Elucien's "will they / won't they?" has been one of the main questions of the ACOTAR series since ACOMAF.

Yes, Gwyn has her own story to tell but Elain is Feyre's sister and she's been waiting to tell her story for much longer. And I do think the underdog deserves her chance to shine when SF continued reminding us that there are still some who feel it's alright to speak for Elain and who don't believe her capable.

This series is not going to end up only being about the Archerons, I imagine SJM will continue on with Mor's story, Gwynriel's story, and more on Nesta's journey outside of Feyre and Rhys.

But to me it doesn't make sense that she would skip over Elain to tell Gwyn and Az's romantic arc first, especially when Az is one of the guilty parties of underestimating Elain.

SJM herself spoke of how her stories revolve around the female's journey and while I admit she also writes books that start off because of a male's journey (Chaol), I think Az getting a book before Elain would completely go against the foundation of what she typically writes. A problematic male character's happiness gained at the expense of a female character's happiness (and an unproblematic male like Lucien) would not be a very Girl Power message.

But of course, that is only my opinion and I have no idea whether SJM sees it that way or not.

#elucien #pro elucien #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #anti e/riel #pro lucien vanserra #pro elain archeron #Azriel critical

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sparrow-in-boots · 11 months

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okay so, I'm going to get to Lucy Stillman and the franchise's treatment of her, but i think I need to explain my own feelings about the portrayal of the modern brotherhood first. I do not buy the "brotherhood = conspiracy theory cult" angle. It's flawed and leads to terrible takes overall, by the lore and by the fandom.

It's a holdover from the fact that the game decides to run with conspiracy theories that we have in the real world, and assign them all to the Isu. they even poke fun of it in the earlier games with the whole lizard people and space wizards in tinfoil hats comments. now that's a whole can of worms in itself given how deeply racist and antisemitic the overwhelming majority of conspriacy theories are, but it's not a good way to portray the assassin brotherhood because that's not what they are. they are far leftists. they are anarchist cells, they are commune organizers, they are revolutionaries. that's not me saying it either, that's just canon, plain and simple.

but that would make the story too close to real-life politics and they can't do that cus it's not in their interests.

therefore, the brotherhood is coded as isolationist cultists, or at least as far as The Farm goes. in current year, i think we can all agree there's an inherent fallacy (if not outright disengenuous portrayal) of painting your leftist organization fighting against the capitalist neocolonial hegemony with the same strokes as the whacky people starting communes in the middle of nowhere to escape 5G towers, fluoride water and the [insert villanized minority group here].

i don't buy it, i don't appreciate it, and i think we could have had a stronger story without it, even regarding Desmond's backstory.

THAT SAID, let's take a look at Lucy. her's is the story of a girl who was forced into adulthood too early after being left to her own devices by a very sheltered and isolating community that failed her, and then inducted into a cult which ultimately killed her and then was promptly swept under the narrative. that cult is the templar order by the by.

Lucy was born and raised within the Brotherhood, and pretty much set lose on the world with no connectiosn to speak of. surely they must have given her a paper trail, fake parents and school enrollments, medical records, the works. she was told to infiltrate Abstergo and probably given a general path towards that, namely research that could be useful to them, but otherwise? she was on her own.

first thing that comes to mind is when Amish folks get their time away from their hometown to experience the world and choose to come back or not. i can't comment on their experience and general view on this so i won't attempt to draw a parallel here, but just that initial mental connection speaks for itself imo.

She speaks of having to wait tables to make ends meet, and while that's the socially expected experience of solo living for a young adult leaving home (work minimun wage jobs, go to college, climb the chain, start small, etc), she has no home to return to. In fact there's this looming tension that even opening up to missing her home or going into detail about it could blow her cover. Even in the privacy of being around friends and colleagues, there's this necessity of keeping up a front. She has to buy it so deeply it becomes her, inside and out, and doing that at such a formative age is bound to take it's toll.

You're removed from everything and everyone you've ever known. You don't know when or if you'll ever see them again. In fact they can die at any moment and you might never hear about it. Contact with them is a fraught and dangerous thing, and even the slightest slip could spell your doom and theirs. Connection is a constant swinging sword of Damocles over her, and who can take comfort and solace from community like that? No one, is who. So of course she'd seek that away from where she could endanger everyone.

So in comes Vidic. She knows he's a templar, of course she does, but he's kind and understanding, a bit frustrating and headstrong, but she can usually talk him into chilling out here and there. And of course, one can draw a parallel between him and Bill. Both are strict and charismatic (in their own way) father and mentor figures, but while Bill is cold and hard, Vidic feigns affection (as Haytham so eloquently put) and the worst part is, it works. Any affection and attention is good attention for the starved, and Lucy's been on the end of her ropes since she's been outside of the Brotherhood.

She knows and can see it's all manipulation, she's not that blind of course, but it chips away at her. That's what emotional manipulation does after all. And then, in come the agents to kill her, and Vidic stops them.

All her life she's heard how brutal and merciless the templars are, and surely she's seen it too while working under them, but right when her facade slips and she should be dead, she's not. Because Vidic spares her. Of course that leaves a deep impression on her, and further erodes her resolve. Slowly but surely, she opens up, and Vidic is an expert at what he does. She may hold quite a bit of guilt and shame at turning, but the templars were there when the brotherhood wasn't.

Bill says that of those they send to infiltrate the templars, they are either "too strong" and can't keep up the charade, or are "too weak" and turn. How is being a human being who needs connection and community "too weak"? How is being slowly lovebombed and manipulated into choosing the wire mother and then being foresaken the plush one when in need weakness?

Desmond says that she "seemed so sincere, like she really wanted to make a difference", and I truly believe she did. Her morals and belief were twisted through years of emotional torture and isolation, and she knew she couldn't return to the brotherhood after how far she caved under the pressure. There's no space for the nuances and endless gray areas of such an unbalanced war in the current brotherhood, and she knows it, so throwing in with the templars for her was the lesser evil. She's not fool enough to buy their propaganda wholesale, but it's a necessary concession in her mind so she can excuse her taking advantage of their attention and community. Again, as long as she's useful to them, she has a place among them.

However, the way she's treated by the narrative is... w o w. We never get the chance to hear it from her side, expect by a pathetically short email on the ACR dlc. While having the protagonists agonize over someone's beliefs after their passing and finding no solid answers, they really don't spend nearly enough time for that to carry much weight narratively. In fact, there's hardly much of a critique on the conditions that led her to that kind of fall from grace, and even less is done to fix it.

She, much like Clay, are the epitomes of how the brotherhood is mirroring too much the templar's and Juno's disregard for human life, and how that needs to change in order for them to turn the tides. But nothing comes of it, because our anchor to the modern timeline gets doomed by the narrative and now all those loose plot holes go nowhere. Her funeral, her burial, her memory, it all gets waved about like an annoying gnat on the dinner table, and nobody does anything but try their best to ignore it until it goes away. Her actress couldn't keep with their schedule, so they got rid of her in the most pathetic horrifyingly dismissive way possible.

Personally I'm not a fan of the templar turncoat plotline they gave her, but if that's what they wanted to go with, then it needed much MUCH more careful writing and it needed to fucking GO SOMEWHERE. But it doesn't. And it sucks.

#assassin's creed #lucy stillman #pardal rambles #ac meta

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thegirlwhowrites642 · 6 months

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I can understand the parallels between jily and hinny, but I sometimes find it really unfair. More often than not, we can see a link not only inside the fandom but with other fandoms too. The deduction of the nature of Harry and Ginny's relationship in context of James and Lily's relationship tends to strike as stereotypical albeit somewhat necessary to some people. However, I feel it's specially unjust to Ginny as she, unlike Harry has no direct connection with either James or lily. So simply reducing her entire personality to Harry married is mother or father feels rather delusional and prejudiced. I understood your meta and appreciate the through analysis of the parallel but don't you think it's rather unjust to rely on predecessors just to analyse a separate character as a whole?

[the post being referenced is this]

First of all, the point of what I had written was that I disagree with making parallels one-on-one between characters:

In general, I have to say that while there are parallels between the characters of the two different generations, I find it very limiting to connect a character to only another of the other group.

I'm sorry if that got lost in all the things I said.

When I said that Ginny between James and Lily is James, it was contextual to the ask I received (I'm also quite fond of the parallels between Ginny and James because they are an excellent way of showing how rooted in misogyny is the fandom's perception of Ginny).

Now, about drawing parallels between hinny and jily: the original story does it. The drawing of parallels between generations and the idea that the next does better is a theme of the original material. To be fair, it's not as central as love or family or choice. Still, it is quite significant, to the point that a lot of the epilogue revolves around it, not limiting itself to the two generations we see throughout the saga but also introducing a new one. Teddy and Victoire are an obvious reference to Harry and Ginny, Ginny herself draws a parallel between her son James and Ron, and Lily Luna has basically the same lines of dialogue Ginny introduced herself with in the first book. And then of course there's Albus Severus, whose name not only is a reconciliation with the generation before Harry but he also looks just like Harry. And just like we saw Harry starting his story at the platform now we see Albus starting his own. The last scene of the saga is Harry and Ginny reproducing the scene of when they first met, but now Harry is not on the train, he is on the platform with Ginny and they both follow the train saying goodbye to their son. Harry is worried for Albus (who, again, looks just like him) because he is thinking about what he, Harry, went through and he is afraid for his son. But Ginny tells him that everything is going to be alright and Harry looks at her and only at that moment tells her he knows he will. He knows because despite everything he went through, now he is the one on the platform, now he has Ginny and their family, so he knows Albus is going to be alright too. [And in fact, what's the running theme of Harry and Ginny's relationship? That they never have time, that they can't be together until Harry defeats Voldemort.]

All of this explanation to say what?

It's the books, it's the author that makes these parallels, and all we can do as readers is acknowledge them. You can also dislike them of course, but they are still there.

But acknowledging the parallels does not mean reducing one character to another, as I previously said: it's not a one-on-one connection. And it's not even the meaning behind those parallels being made, the point of the parallels is a sort of learning from the past kind of concept. And also, I might add an if you try to do the good thing, one day, everything is going to be alright: James and Lily's sacrifice saves Harry; Harry, therefore, can grow up, he goes through a lot of shit just like Ginny, they fall in love, Voldemort is defeated after they sacrifice their happiness, and so a generation that grows up without knowing war is born. Adding parallels between these generations helps connect the characters and highlights the chain of events, a chain of events that revolves around the three main themes of the story: love, family, and choice.

And yes, the previous generation the parallels are drawn with is connected to Harry because it's his story. The saga is not about a war or friendship or whatever. It's Harry's coming-of-age story told through the journey of the hero. I don't find that unfair towards Ginny.

Also, at the end of the day, it seems to me a lot more fair to make parallels between Ginny and James (the first) than, let's say... Ron and Sirius. Ginny is a Potter. That's her family too even if she never meets them, a family she chose, a family she decided to carry the name of. If we had the story from Ginny's perspective we probably would have parallels between a bunch of other characters. Who knows... maybe Harry really resembles Grandpa Weasley.

#ginny weasley #harry potter

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caralara · 26 days

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I know Louis' your fave so I hope it's okay that I send you this. But recently the blinkers have been coming off for me in regards to Louis. I think I used to have him up on a bit of a pedestal. I just thought he was this really intelligent guy, really aware of social issues and willing to fight for the right thing and be rebellious when necessary. I don't know. I saw things playing out very differently. But unfortunately, lately, I've been seeing a lot of laziness and complacency and a willingness to settle from him. A lot of contradictions as well. Like he gets the anarchist symbol tattooed but doesn't speak out or place his support behind anything substantial. I'm sorry, legalizing weed is his most political stance. And then being seen with the Starbucks cup and actually covering it in the video like lmao. Not knowing what number year your festival is when he supposedly had big dreams for it. I know this is so small but it irks me that he's been going on about playing the guitar for years. And he is yet to bring it on stage for even one song! I know it comes from a place of self-doubt and insecurity no matter how confident he makes himself appear but like he just doesn't help himself. And fans exaggerating and praising every little thing he does as if he isn't just some basic white man does my head in. Sorry I word vomited on you and I know this sounds harsh but I acknowledge it comes from a bitter place where I feel like his potential is just not being met. At the end it's his life and I genuinely hope he doesn't have many regrets later on.

hi babe

I think I am completely in the same situation as you! I might not be triggered by exactly the same things but I’ve been going over and over it for the last couple days asking myself why I’m so annoyed with him right now?? And I think it really is just the disappointment finding out your fave man is after all, just a man.

Like, to me, it feels like he’s been stagnant since early 2023. right now, to me it feels like he’s just on the hunt for the cheap thrill, getting the validation in that he also can pull massive crowds of screaming girls just like he did during 1D (and it isn’t even the actual validation he’s looking for??? Like he still starts yapping every time a man validates him as if it’s so much more important??)

I feel like he lost focus, or energy, or both. You know, you said it!! You know I love Louis to death, he’s my favourite, and genuinely, I don’t blame him. It makes a lot of sense to me. He’s finally proven himself to not be a flop to all the people doubting him. He’s overcome all the obstacles, did LTWT and had massive success with it, way beyond anyone expected, rode that wave, made a second album that proved he’s not a one hit wonder either, an album he actually enjoyed making, and proved his fans liked it, too. And then… it just kind of stagnated. His team made mistakes and miscalculations. Announcing Asia tour so short notice thinking, then cancelling bc it didn’t sell out, handling the announcements horribly, not realising LTWT was massive bc of all the pent up excitement and desire throughout years of a pandemic, the magnetism of it being the first solo world tour. They also didn’t get it when it came to Milano Summer fest vs. AFHF. The 35k sold out bc it was announced many months in advance and it was the last LTWT show - that’s meaningful to fans. It was easily accessible. You can’t translate just the numbers to „it’s bc he’s popular in Italy,“ there’s so many factors at play they ignored, and therefore AFHF Italy only sold 2/3 of tickets, and a lot of these people didn’t even show up (couldn’t, I better say).

For me, FITF felt like he had checked out a little. He’s plateauing. The excitement and irresistible draw he has is largely due to his resilience, his underdog persona he created that allows normal people to identify with him. And there just wasn’t any… growth since early 2023. He‘s also alienated a large part of his fandom with the bbg pushes, and as you know, I still believe it was all part of the bigger plan to end it, but it does feel like he gave up, got comfortable. And it’s not that I blame him for it necessarily?? Like all he’s been through? It makes a lot of sense to me that now he’s achieved all the things people told him he wouldn’t be able to achieve, that now the burn out sets in, that now, the driving energy of spite and wanting to prove himself has run out.

I feel like the jokes of “oh I’m a pothead I can’t remember if it’s the third or fourth edition of my super duper important close to my heart festival project” or “oh yeah sometimes I forget I’m an actual parent and have a kid” are getting old. Like, it doesn’t serve him anymore it feels like? To me it feels like the weed was a coping mechanism that helped him get through hard times, and that’s completely valid, but now it looks like to me it’s holding him back, blurring his genius.

I’m sorry for the rant back to you. I’m deeply upset because Louis is my escape, my happy place, fandom is my comfort, and I feel like it’s slipping through my fingers because it causes me more upset than happiness at this point. The amount of “kill yourself” messages I have gotten over criticising louis for announcing AFHF so short notice is frankly INSANE. Do people not talk to other people in real life?? How do the people around these people that send those messages deal with them in real life?? It’s so upsetting to see how many people feel comfortable typing out these kind of messages and sending them.

I do hope this feeling of mine calms down, and I can go back to just glorifying louis and have him as my comfort place, because I do not like the thoughts I have and the way it makes me feel.

#anon #louis #sorry anon #please be gentle with me #I am just genuinely expressing my feelings #and believe me I am aware that I am judgemental #and have no idea what his life and thoughts etc look like in reality bc I don’t know him at all #but this is my fandom experience #and the way I feel about it atm

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ryuichirou · 24 days

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Replies

A couple of replies with fandom stuff, then a couple of twst replies.

irregardlessly-tish asked:

A friend message me "YOU FOLLOW THE LEVI X GRISHA PERSON" and I had no clue what they were talking about but then they showed me the two pictures you drew of Levi and Grisha lol. It made me laugh a lot. Then I helped them found the uncensor version of one of the drawings in your pixiv since the link to twitter seem to be broken (I'm a great friend I know/j). I guess you could say they are big fans of your rarepair work!

LEVI X GRISHA PERSON AAAHH 😭 It’s always so funny to learn how people are referring to us; I was the Zevi artist, the Shroudcest artist… For some reason, being a Guriri (wow Grisha’s and Levi’s shipname is cute, I completely forgot about it) artist feels like such a high honour lol Especially because I had no idea there was someone out there invested in this ship. Your friend’s taste is excellent. A huge thank you to them for enjoying our stuff, and a huge thank you to you for helping to find the uncensored version. You really are a great friend hehe.

It’s honestly a shame that even the pixiv version is still censored (albeit not cropped like the tumblr version), because you can’t really post uncensored stuff there… So now only a few people who had saved our snk smut back when it was posted on our now-deleted twitter have it :(

(it’s a bit embarrassing looking back at those sketches and seeing all the mistakes though, yikes)

Anonymous asked:

I want to shake antis by the shoulders and scream at them all the time cause I see them being sooo unhealthy with themselves, and I've BEEN there I know what they are doing and I know it is just going to get them hurt with the same train wreck I got myself in!!

It's the whole problem with black and white thinking where you go "people treat incest shippers like satan himself, so I cannot accidentally enjoy it or I would be evil incarnate too, and adopted/step is the same thing, so I cannot accidentally like that, and found family is basically the same as adopted, so I have to avoid that, and character A called character B his bro one time, so..." that thinking pattern does not have a stopping point!!!!!! It is so unhealthy!!!!!!!!

And then people realize they can't stop themselves from enjoying unhealthy ships, and instead of separating fiction from reality, they just excuse everything abusive about the ship like it is fine and normal behavior because they cannot accept themselves enjoying something that is remotely problematic. It is so much more likely to get people hurt than just enjoying the porn of some fake brothers fucking 😭

Anon! First of all, sorry for replying late; we received your ask about a week ago but I didn’t have enough time to properly address it. Second of all, thank you for talking about it and sharing your experience.

It’s just like you said; people really don’t want to get ridiculed or hated, especially younger people, therefore, they are afraid of liking stuff that is even slightly problematic. And for some of them, if they don’t want their so-called friends to suspect them loving problematic stuff, they’ll act even more aggressive than they should to overcompensate. I feel like when it comes to antis who talk about us specifically, the most vocal and persistent ones are those whose friends called them out for following my accounts or liking my drawings. And this is honestly both sad and pathetic at the same time; I cannot imagine how bad of a headspace this might be. I don’t pity them though lol

We always talk about it, but still: this is a game you can’t win because the rules are always changing. The only thing that never changes is that there is no nuance, once the crowd decide that the ship is bad, it’s bad. Starting out with the basics, age gaps and incest are bad, right? Right. But what if the characters aren’t canonically related but could be interpreted as brothers? Then it’s still bad, right? But what if they aren’t at all brotherly, but one of them expressed that they want to do bad things to the other? Sounds bad, right? And thus, the only type of dynamic that exists is a romanticised version of a perfect gay couple: they are equal in every way, they love each other, they are SUCH DORKS together who fit perfectly to any “redraw this as your ship” meme that’s the hottest thing these days, they don’t have arguments, they don’t have misunderstanding and rough moments. Their personalities, everything that made their relationship unique or interesting completely disappears and smoothes out, and after that it’s not even a ship, it’s just a nice blend that is perfect for consumption because it doesn’t irritate your teeth, your throat, or your stomach. It’s tasteless, it’s boring, it’s nothing, and it’s not about the characters, it’s about deciding which two characters are unproblematic enough to be transformed into blorbos, and if they have some problematic elements in-canon, it’s okay, we’ll just erase those because being unproblematic doesn’t really matter. What matters is to act in a way that doesn’t go against what the rest of them are doing, because otherwise you’re making people uncomfortable, and if they are uncomfortable with you, they feel morally correct for attacking you.

It’s never about characters. It’s always about control, about cliques, about bullying and making everyone afraid to have an actual opinion. It’s about instilling in people’s mind that attacking strangers on the internet makes you a cool person because you are simultaneously a rebel for being so ballsy and brave, and a saint for having moral standards so high that you can’t stomach bad things even if they are fictional.

Sometimes people just have different ships and that’s okay. Sometimes people don’t have any ships and don’t understand the shipping culture, and that’s okay. What’s not okay is to feel entitled to this control over the way others consume media and interact with it.

Because it makes the fandom experience boring at best and unbearable at worst.

Sorry, I digress lol What I wanted to say is that you are right, it messes with people’s brains. And it is much more unhealthy than fantasising about the things that are 100% fictional (which is, by the way, a huge part of their appeal).

Anonymous asked:

just wanted to say I love your content a lot, it's a breath of fresh air from all the anti content present in the fandom

You are very welcome, Anon! And thank you so much for your support <3 It means a lot to hear that our stuff is refreshing to you.

Anonymous asked:

Is Lilia sneezing on people on purpose, or is it a sneeze button for him?

(this is related to this post)

We’ll never know, Anon, it’s one of Lilia’s many mysteries…

Maybe it started out as a joke, but then he really began to sneeze on people every time his nose gets booped lol

Anonymous asked:

Where can I see the art for the new Shaftlands event?

I don’t think all of them are fully out yet, but people are pretty active on twitter, so simply looking up characters’ names is probably going to work!

Anonymous asked:

…Quick, someone bully Idia into sending nudes.

And be quick about it because Idia could also quickly change his mind and hack the recipient’s phone to delete the pictures!!

#replies

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mydemonsdrivealimo · 2 months

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a note on my commissions ~

so fun fact i hate making posts like this but i kinda have to. so.

over the last few months i have felt like Garbage. i have been chronically tired and exhausted. its been taking a very serious toll on me mentally (or the other way around? cant tell); i can be perfectly fine one minute and within the next hour i can barely communicate with or tolerate anyone else. my ocd has been impacting my daily life much more than usual to the point that has made functioning inside and outside of my home an immense struggle. it has taken up much of my mental space and makes focusing incredibly difficult. i believe this is also what has led me to stop drawing, stop enjoying drawing, and writing, too

i recently had a family emergency that required my full attention, and it made me realize just how exhausted i really am. it put me out of commission way more than it should have and it has been a nightmare catching up again. it's hard to tell if i am trying to get back at it too soon, or if there truly is something wrong, but it has made me realize that im pushing myself more than i need to

commissions have been a serious part of the stress ive been trying to ignore. im not great at "being chill," especially during an emergency, so instead of putting it on the backburner and separating my responsibilities, it all goes into one pot and boils over. with this said, i have a lot of changes coming in the next few months of this semester that will required my attention as well

so, for the next few months, ill be closing my commissions. of course i will honor current commissions--though they may take longer than normal--and event hosts please feel free to reach out to me in that time! theres always a chance ill be up to one or two, but, for now, its something i need to take off my plate as a full time responsibility

i dont tend to like these types of posts because i enjoy keeping my fandom life strictly for fandom, and i hate being perceived, but this has also been a way for me to admit these struggles to myself, which i hope will prove to be somewhat freeing

its hard to tell if i will be on less or more than normal. my characters have always been a place of creativity and escapism for me, but i also tend to use it as a distraction from my problems, which just leads to nothing getting done, which turns into more stress, and therefore more problems. i still of course will be around and be posting regularly, but it's hard to tell exactly how im going to go about all of this

thanks for reading if you got this far and i hope to be back to my regular art and fic posting soon (with the hope that im able to regain my time, energy, and love for those mediums)

#personal

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volixia669 · 2 years

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Vampire Chronicles Basics

Okay, with the new Interview with the Vampire show coming out, there’s probably going to be some folks who might be curious about the books and wondering why there’s so much disrespect towards the author. This probably isn’t the ONLY primer, but like, whatever.

Note: I never got around to reading all of her books, and some of this is drawing from memory though wikipedia is helpful.

Contextual History Lesson Time!

As a media criticism type person, I find it important to not examine media in a vacuum, and take into account what was happening at the time it was created.

The timing of the first three books is notable. Interview with a Vampire was released in 1976, The Vampire Lestat was released in 1985, and Queen of the Damned was released in 1988.

So we have one book with gay subtext released post free love movement but prior to gay folks becoming more known in society, then two more released during the aids crisis with the queer subtext/text still going strong. This? This is huge. Reportedly, there were people sending Anne Rice letters about how amazing it was to see themselves in the characters. Some these days might roll their eyes at how subtext might be revolutionary, but please understand. During the aids crisis, the queer community, particularly gay men, were being blamed and discriminated against to horrifying levels to the point gay men still can’t give blood.

So for a book series to have not only the metaphor of penetration and being an outbut but also have these characters seem very gay? It’s huge! It’s like a weight being lifted off, even just temporairly, while you go, “Someone sees me and my situation.”

The Vampire Lestat even had Lestat’s mother questioning her gender and deciding to dress and act more masculine. Sure, these days we’d call it “problematic” trans rep for many reasons, but back in 1985? Except for certain more indie films, trans people weren’t even talked about.

Which is a huge reason the series got big among the queer community, others caught wind, and eventually that movie with Brad Pitt was made.

And now we’re in the 90s with a few things happening. One of which being Anne Rice uh...Firing her editor? Not bothering with an editor? Whatever happened, the quality of writing goes downhill.

Additionally, Anne Rice was going through...a lot, and it shows in her writing. She started as one sect of Christianity, left it after a family member died, was athiest/agnostic for awhile, then went to a different sect of Christianity when another family member died, then eventually was in her own thing of believing in God & Jesus but not following any particular sect. Then she died.

This is relevant, as we see Lestat go from prissy rockstar to literally meeting Jesus. So. There’s that.

Another thing that happened in the 90s was the internet becoming bigger, resulting in things like forums, chatgroups, livejournal, and essentially online fandom. People in the Vampire Chronicles fandom began sharing their fanfiction.

Anne Rice hated that. It was her world, her property, her Gary-Stu, and therefore only she could write Vampire Chronicles. She began suing anyone who was writing fanfiction, yes, even the broke teenagers.

She wasn’t the only one doing this of course, but she was certainly adamant about it. Additionally, there’s an emotional element too. Because her work was one of the few popular media where queers could see themselves in, it was like a betrayal to have her say, “No, I hate anyone who loves this world so much they’d write fic.” (not a real quote btw just how it felt)

This is why many fanfic writers in the 2000s, early 2010s, and a few even today write disclaimers at the top of their fic. Because a “I do not own this property. This property belongs to blah blah blah” was one of the few defenses (however flimsy) fanfic writers had. It’s also why, as of the last time I checked ff.net, Anne Rice’s works are not allowed on that site.

That said, from this backlash against fandom, Archive of Our Own and its lawyers were born. The volunteers of OT3 are why y’all will be able to write Lestat fucking Louis into next week and post it there without worrying about Anne Rice’s estate hounding you.

The Books Themselves

So! With that lengthy history done, what about the books? To start off with, while the movie, and this new show are called “Interview with the Vampire”, that’s just the first book. The series as a whole are The Vampire Chronicles.

So we’ve got:

Interview with the Vampire (1976)

The Vampire Lestat (1985)

The Queen of the Damned (1988)

The Tale of the Body Thief (1992)

Memnoch the Devil (1995, the one where Lestat meets Jesus, a lot of people hate it, I think its hilarious with some interesting theological points)

New Tales of the Vampires-Pandora (1998, prequel about an older Roman vampire) New Tales of the Vampires-Vittorio the Vampire (1999, another prequel, about a 15th century Italian Nobleman vampire)

The Vampire Armand (1998, it’s Armand’s story and also I maintain the first 60 pages reads like an M-rated fanfic on ff.net, which is objectively hilarious imho)

Merrick (2000, crossover with another her series called the Mayfair Witches)

Blood and Gold (2001, now the ancient vampire Marius gets his own origin story.)

Blackwood Farm (2002, more Mayfair Witches crossover)

Blood Canticle (2003, EVEN MORE CROSSOVER also was originally gonna be a conclusion buuuuuuuuuuut)

Prince Lestat (2014, Lestat is back and is facing pressure to lead the vampires because I guess all the ones with enough of a brain cell to go that would be a TERRIBLE idea are dead)

Prince Lestat and the Realms of Atlantic (2016, I guess we’re now in Atlantis?)

Blood Communion (2018)

As you can see there’s a lot of books and content. Especially because Vampire Chronicles wasn’t her only series. On top of her erotic romance series that even my “sure you can watch Criminal Minds while 9 years old” mom was like, “Do not touch that,” she had her Tales of the Mayfair Witches series, which AMC incidentally also has the rights for. So...Lots of books, one world with vampires and witches and Jesus.

However, because of the drop in quality as well as the level of batshittery (no I’m still not over Lestat going to fucking Atlantis), last I checked the main reads are the first three, with Vampire Armand also being thrown in because I mean, after you see Antonio Banderas as Armand you want to know more about him.

Of course by all means! Read more of the books! Maybe you’ll get a laugh like I did! Maybe the quality doesn’t seem so bad to you! Maybe you enjoy batshittery!

And if you don’t want to give the Anne Rice estate more money because she was a bad person, there’s plenty of libraries that have the books! Trust me. They do. Some might even have them in ebook version, so you can use apps like overdrive or libby to check them out without even leaving your house!

Appropriation in Vampire Chronicles

This is gonna be short since I’m sure there’s whole pieces about this and I don’t have the books in front of me nor am I part of any of these cultures, but I do want to run over that yes, there’s certainly some cultural appropriation in this series, particularly of Egyptian Culture, but also of voodoo and creole culture.

I want to warn of this, so it doesn’t catch anyone off guard, especially since “Merrick” and “Queen of the Damned” in particular are uh. Full of this. I also have no idea if the more recent books are any better in this regard.

That said, I’m curious about how the AMC tackles these aspects, as its already quite clear they’re not following the books 1:1, which is actually going to make for a better story.

Hopefully all that is helpful!

#vampire chronicles #interview with a vampire #the vampire chronicles #anne rice #interview with a vampire amc #this turned out longer than i thought #but yes hello people new to this welcome to a fandom with a shitton of baggage #also yes theres a lot of personal opinion about the books #BUT I'M SORRY WHY TO FUCKING ATLANTIS WAS SHE SMOKING CRACK BEFORE KICKING IT?#read memnoch the devil for the hilarity of lestat coming to jesus and cool theology and nothing else #also literally the only thing i remember from tale of the body thief is lestat jacking off while in a human body #...i think that's just from reading it when 12 so unused to such things #granted i reread it when in college and it was still a weird scene #even with context #ANYWAYS HAVE FUN Y'ALL AND RESPECT AO3 FOR BEING WHY YOU DON'T HAVE TO FEAR THE RICE LAWYERS

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vallyofshimmeringstars · 2 years

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Calling out OM and theories. Welcome to fandom theories.

Their is A LOT of spoilers on Lilith and overall spoilers

I love how MC and the Brothers are holding onto mc .000000001% angel

Like Lilith had to have died and turned human a long long time ago and it’s not even like the brothers once thought that mc looked like Lilith or had any resemblance like if Lilith was her grandma or sm

And didn’t Lilith turn human to be with the human she loved? So she wasn’t even a angel when she had kids making the whole bloodline human

And I love how the OM fandom just ignores that it’s somewhat WEIRD and incest like to think of mc as their sister and liking them. Even if they aren’t biological it’s still on the back of our minds

Sure Mc might have angel in their blood because their great great great great great great ^100000 grandmother was once a angel but it still makes them human

But that also opens another question, why was MC able to open the attic without all the brothers pacts if they were human

(I saw this one TikTok of Lilith spying on mc and she saw some certain lesson iykyk so possibly ) BUT here is what I like to think of it

Did Lilith grant mc the powers of a angel or have something to do with it? What ever happen to liliths soul when she passed, maybe sense she was a angel she became MC guardian angel and hence why she was allowed to open the attic?

And if Lilith was a angel was it worth the brothers falling for the sake of Lilith? If Lilith was going to be sent to devildom then wouldn’t that make more sense for being in love with a human?

We all know she died in the celestial war but the celestial war was because of her. . . ? Why would she die in the same war she caused. Wouldn’t it make more sense for the brothers to die during the war and Lilith being sent to devildom? Or all of them die?

And how could a angel even die? So was the brothers fall really worth the death of Lilith?

And it isn’t like she died and turned human. Lucifer was the one who made the deal to turn Lilith human which cycles back to her being a human and mc being fully human. But let’s say Lilith still had angel blood in a humans body

That would make more sense that Mc would have those powers. But wouldn’t anyone else related to Lilith have the same thing? Or was MC chosen.

But once human Lilith died wouldn’t she be a angel once more if she still had angel blood?

Or was it like a Steven universe type of thing where Rose became Steven once she gave birth

And maybe that’s why when MC was sent to devildom they didn’t have any memories because Lilith became mc

But that’s also another reason why them having a crush on their sister is weird

Lets get to the angels

Obey me is suppose to be the biblically accurate for the most part

But we never see Jesus

Is it because MC is Jesus because Lilith was made by god (god son but we are going to say child) and Jesus was a angel who was most part looking human and sacrificed himself for god. Though Mc did sacrifice themself it wasn’t for god. So is mc Somewhat Jesus? (I would die if they added Jesus to the game)

Ok ok maybe Mc isn’t Jesus. Going back to biblically accurate, angels are TERRIFYING. Their meant to look terrifying to keep the demons away and demons are the most beautiful to draw in human (they got that right). So why do the angels look so pretty (adorable for luke) to us? Is it because mc isn’t human and therefore they don’t need to look scary? But from what I said Mc is a human.

That makes for sense. but do the angels knows that Lilith ever turned human to be with the person she fell in love with? If so then the war was a waste if they can hippy boppity boo makes Lilith a human. So maybe the angels don’t know mc is related to her. It would make sense if Lilith became MC and saw the angels as beautiful creatures.

But is that why Lilith was able to talk to MC?

Not 100% like rose and Steven. I’m sure we know a difference between a Alien rock and a angel.

Was Lilith able to turn into Mc because they were the chosen one to go to devildom. Absolutely. Is that why mc have some powers? Absolutely. Does it all kinda make sense? Yes.

Thats all I can think of, I’ll make next part I’m not done yet

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psshaw · 1 year

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Just to throw in a "different third thing" into the conversation, I was a fandom artist for most of my life simply because I was fine with my characters staying inside my head, but blorbos from the shows existed outside said head, therefore had to be drawn. Idk.

But I never cared for trends and ish, so it was like: *Draws for a completely dead fandom*. *Draws background characters no one cares about*. *Comes into a magical girl fandom obsessed with romance/fashion and draws about WAR and FIGHTING instead, upsetting some people*.

I had like. 20 people of audience to show for it, at any given time :D So now that I'm finally drawing my own stuff, the drop is... Not high.

OOOH yes, this is how I remember it being before I had a solid stable of characters too! Fantastic point.

A lot of what made pre-socmed fandom great was the sincerity of getting really stuck on something and playing with that dollhouse for years. I remember it was around the time Devilman Crybaby came out that we started saying to each other… oh, things are different now. We’re going to have a new fandom every season.

The accounts I see on twitter that change their avatar/banner/theme every time a new anime hits the scene are like. An alien world, to me. Like speed dating. You can’t possibly be reliably, singularly touched by ALL that incredibly popular media, right?? Or are they more in love with the newness and the consumption of it all…?

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michelleelizabethtanner · 1 year

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Omggggg, I am so thankful you answered my ask! I love your work and your blog is my safe haven for Brio! I love that you always take the time to answer in depth and reading your blog is just as fun as reading your fics!

Fangirling aside, I agree with everything you said about Mick! Not gonna lie, I read "miscast" and had to take a deep breath for a hot minute 🤣 But I finished reading your response and I see your reasoning. I totally agree!

I hate to keep saying it, but I think the writers really dropped the ball on that one. I do believe they intended him to be ruthless with no loyalties, but when a performance shines through differently from the script, they should adapt to it, especially since it didn't seem like they had much understanding of the character! I agree that Carlos made that character what it was and did the work for them. Mick is my baby and I attribute my love for him to Carlos' performance. All they had to do was follow his lead like many other authors in the fandom did with their fics! Or they should have given him direction to play it meaner if they wanted ruthless, idek at this point. He was such a cinnamon roll and it was so hard to think he would do that, especially since he seemed to end up really liking the girls.

As for Rio and Nick, my interpretation of their whole relationship comes just from the opening scene of 4.08 alone. Again, this is all headcanon because, once again, I don't think they put as much depth into Nick's character as they should have, therefore, I don't feel that we got deep enough into his and Rio's dynamic despite the backstory. There are some holes to fill in!

The scene starts with Rio drawing and Nick playing on his gameboy. He appears discouraged because he can't draw the eyes, so Nick does it for him and then encourages him, telling him "you'll get there, brother" and Rio playfully corrects him saying "cousin". Then when his abuela starts groaning by the oven, indicating something went wrong, little Rio gets up to go check on her and Nick stays playing with his game boy. He tries out Abuela's cookies even though they taste bad and Nick declines to taste it when offered. Then of course comes the pretty on-the-nose rotten egg metaphor where the egg that Rio drops sinks (indicating good egg) and Nick's floats (bad egg)

Rio getting up to go check on his abuela shows he cares for her. He heard her fussing and got up right away to check on her. Meanwhile, Nick stays seated. I think because Rio shows he cares, he is grandma's favourite. Later in the episode, we see them joking around about him buying her a new oven and just being a sweet grandmother/grandson duo. We never got any shot of Nick cutting up with grandma like that.

So Rio is a good-looking guy, charming, smart, very talented in boxing and he's grandma's favourite? Oh, brousin is clearly jealous and insecure and that causes tension between them growing up. I think he spent his whole life trying to prove to himself that he is better than Rio. When you're jealous of someone, there's an aspect of wanting to be the person you envy because really, you envy that person because that person is great. I think Nick hates himself and wishes he was Rio, which is why he does a lot to put him down. He rats him out and gets him arrested, which causes his trainer to drop him and he assumes the boss position in all of their operations and makes him an underling. It must feel validating to "conquer" him.

I also think this is why he switches between calling him cousin and brother. Whenever he refers to Rio as brother, it's to put them in the same boat. For example, during the dinner in 4.06, he doubles down on calling him brother to show Beth he's not different from Rio or rather, that Rio is not better than him. Whoever this suburban mama is who Rio clearly has a thing for, she has to know he's not all that. They are brothers connected by blood, the closest he can be associated with Rio. Another example is when he has to get Rio out of jail in 4.08. He feels so high and mighty telling Rio that he owes him and he says "That's why you got me, brother". It must feel incredibly validating to him to be needed by Rio at this point (same sentiments for the first scene in 4.08 when he draws the eyes for him). Calling him brother is pulling him down from this imaginary pedestal and puts him on Nick's level.

When he calls Rio cousin, it's to lift himself above Rio. He refers to Rio as cousin only twice. The first time is in the same episode when Beth comes to the community garden. In the midst of humblebragging about being a councilman who actually does something, Beth asks him "what does your brother think?" and he corrects her by saying "cousin". It's giving now that we're talking about my accomplishments and how great of a councilman I am, he's no longer my brother, we are not the same, I am better. The second time is in 4.09 at the boxing ring right before he "disciplines" Rio. He feels so on top in that moment because Rio is powerless.

For all these reasons, I think Nick hates Rio because he hates himself. But does Rio hate Nick?

I think you're right, no he does not. The first scene in 4.08 shows they were not always butting heads, but Nick's growing resentment and insecurity caused more strife between them. I believe Rio admired Nick. When Nick ratted Rio out, I don't think Rio fully understood why. He made it seem like growing all of their illegal money-making endeavours was for family and for Rio's benefit and Rio was the sacrifice for a better life. He thought Nick was smart for thinking long term. He probably expected that after being sacrificed, they would be chill again, but that's not the case because Nick hated him. I think not understanding why Nick hated him so much really affected him, which is why he lacks emotional intelligence (c'mon, his brother/cousin gets him arrested, he doesn't walk away, then Beth gets him arrested and he doesn't walk away either. He was taught those were just setbacks in a long term plan. No emotional intelligence!).

I think he only really understood once Beth got shot. Nick used her to torture him under the guise that they really needed her for business (which they did, it was a good idea to involve her, but let's be real, he wanted to toy with Rio). For Rio, there's clearly no reason for Nick to want Beth other than Rio wanting Beth ("always want what I got"). Beth and Rio both chose each other and Nick just could not stand that, could not understand why people always choose Rio. His rage causes him to hit Beth where it hurts. When Beth gets shot, I think Rio finally realizes that his brother figure is not some great man to be admired. There's no method to his madness, he's just mad. It's the moment he realizes that Nick's competitiveness is just a result of him being insecure and jealous. In their final call in prison, Rio does not address him as bro, or cousin, he just calls him "man". I think that shows he finally sees through Nick entirely and addressing him as "man" is him severing their familial ties. I don't think that means he hates him. A part of him will always remember those times when they were cool, but he will never consider him family again.

Oh gosh, this turned into some 500-page essay that might only make sense in my head 🤣 I apologize in advance for this mess!

What are your thoughts on Rio and Nick?

Anon, this is such a good dissection! All the supporting evidence and analysis! You did such a good job, idk what I could add. I agree: Nick always resented the easy way Rio gained affection from others, and Rio always tried to justify Nick’s cruelties despite them escalating over time. Their natures were set up in the flashback scene and you picked up on so much important detail. I love it. 💕

#nick and rio #goes to show #who we are as kids is who we are forever #doesn’t matter what mask we try to put on #our natures always ultimately show #good girls nbc #Rio #Rio’s grandma’s special little baby #headcanon

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lady-starbind · 2 years

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So the Your Boyfriend Fandom seems to be resurfacing?

...or maybe not, but I still wanna say my lil piece before going on with my day: As little to zero of you guys know, I used to be interested in Your Boyfriend. (A Christian, into a EROTIC horror dating sim?! ...Look, Fuboo was promising a SFW version of the game, I was looking forward to that)

Sometimes, a deranged, creepy yandere guy wanting you and only you can be very enticing... BUT that enticement turned into rage when a good Samaritan on this very website pointed out the true nature of Fuboo and her hubby.

But just being told “X person is a groomer and her husband is a rapist” is not enough to get me to fully believe you... but it wasn’t just HEARSAY either, there were like what... a couple of docs? With some very compelling evidence. Reading those docs was enough for me to be like “Screw this crap, I’m not supporting a groomer and her rapist hubby!” ...I went from wanting Peter on my wall, to wanting to burn the pictures of him that I had printed out. That being said, I don’t believe one should support the creator and her crew that works on “Your Boyfriend”. If you want to enjoy Peter and crew, that’s fine I guess... Just remember to separate Artist from art. And since Fuboo isn’t as big time as other gaming companies such as Nintendo, Sega or Cheritz, I highly recommend that you keep your YB stuff more private among yourselves, as displaying your amazing art talent may get other people into the fandom... And honestly? That’s not really a good thing. I have my own fanon version of Peter known as “Seater”, he’s going to be used for a private RP between me and a couple of my friends. (Our Ingening RP to be exact, he’s one of the antagonists!) ...The point is, I’m not going to draw my fanon Peter and post him to my blog here or anything like that, because I don’t want Fuboo to get more exposure and therefore more support. My art talent is NOT for supporting groomers and rapists. ...And please, do not donate to the Patreon of Your Boyfriend or Black Shepherd Games. These shady people do NOT deserve any support whatsoever. Was thinking about posting this potential small tweet on my Twitter, but refrained bc I have baby minors who follow me and I don’t want them to get an interest in the game. By the way, if you’re a minor and you’re reading this PLEASE DO NOT GET INTO YOUR BOYFRIEND. Firstly, it’s highly NSFW. Secondly, the people who make the game are highly shady and dangerous. You’re far better off playing Pokemon, Zelda, Splatoon or heck even Fall Guys! ...Can’t go wrong with good old fashioned Among us either~

(I have made retweets and mentions on my Twitter not to support YB and to spread awareness though.)

Which now I’ll state my second point: I find it very disgusting how there are people who are blindly supporting Fuboo bc they “Want the game to release so they can leap into Peter senpai’s pants UwU” ...There’s actually a whole doc explaining how the Black Shepherd Games server was like this cult, and they were encouraging folks on the server to talk crap about the victim and anyone who dared to stand up for someone speaking out against their rapist. If they did that. they’d get server perks or something to that effect. Now with me just telling you all this, I don’t expect you to blindly believe me. Good on you, BUT: I have a link to a thread on Twitter as to why I believe Melissa and her hubby Jake are such awful people and why they and Black Shepherd Games as a whole should NEVER be trusted. >>> Proof that backs up the claims made in this post. Now... If you still believe that Fuboo and them are innocent after going through all of this proof, please do me a favor and block me. My blog, Ingo Simping and my silly antics are not for your enjoyment. We do NOT allow Fuboo Apologists here!

But: If you just enjoy the content, separating art from artist and adamant about not supporting Fuboo and Black Shepherd Games whatsoever, then your cool. Please feel free to interact with me if you want, as long as you don’t fall into and of my other DNI criteria.

God bless and have a lovely day, and Fuboo and BSG if any of y’all are reading this, just know one thing: You may escape the law, and you may escape punishment for your actions for now... BUT MARK MY WORD, Karma has your name and when she comes to your doorstep with a piping hot plate of justice, y’all WILL NOT ESCAPE.

You guys don’t fool me, I hope you guys rot in prison!

#Your Boyfriend #YBG #YB Peter #Your Boyfriend Peter #Peter #Seater #adult issue #Fuboo #Melissa King #Jacob King #Black Shepherd Games #BSG #Inverted Mind #Inverted Mind INC #Your Girlfriend #Your Girlfriend Sarah #Sarah

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maple-the-awesome · 1 year

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We'll Meet Again...I Know When || Chapter 11

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x GN Reader

Words: 3,672

Overview: Given your old-fashioned personality and obsession with all things 1940s to 1980s, it’s no wonder that most people refer to you as an ‘old soul’ who would’ve rather lived back then than in the modern era. Little do they know, you already did, but with your previous life as Hollie Stark cut short, you’ve been left with some…unfinished business, to say the least. Top of your list? Finally getting to marry your thought-to-be-lost fiancé.

Series Masterlist 🤎 Marvel Masterlist 🤎 Fandom Masterlist

CHAPTER ELEVEN: LIKE THE GOOD O' DAYS

Like an animal returning from hibernation, you've become considerably more energetic as the winter begins drawing to a close. The idea of warmer weather, even if just a small improvement from what you've been seeing, has made the idea of leaving the apartment far less bothersome, therefore much to Bucky's joy, you've finally agreed to visit Old Town with him.

Going to the historical neighborhood in Bucharest has been on your roommate's mind for a while now. He had first been informed of its existence while helping your elderly neighbor, Rosetta, bring groceries up to her apartment as he normally does every Monday. She made the designation sound so interesting and given Bucky's wonder, you happily agreed to go sometime.

Of course, that was a week or two before the first snowfall. Now, you love Bucky with all your heart- enough to remember him in a completely new life even - but enough to trek through mounds of freezing snow just to see some old buildings? If you wanted to look at something old and beautiful, you'd just stare at him all day; no risk of hyperthermia needed!

Honestly, you would've toughened up and gone for the hike if it made Bucky happy, but perhaps taking pity upon you, he decided to bless you with a compromise to wait for warmer weather. Seeing that the streets are no longer buried in slippery snow or splashy slush, it's a perfect time to make good on that deal.

Armed with an oversized coat, hat, scarf, and mittens, you're fully equipped for the chill which still holds a tight grasp over the air unfortunately. Even Bucky wears several layers of clothing topped with his own coat, although it isn't that much compared to what everyone else is wearing. Then again, the man's built like a brick wall; you doubt much wind gets passed those muscles.

"So, what's on the itinerary today, Barnes? I'm assuming you've got the whole day planned for us, right?" Despite your mouth being covered by your scarf, your breath is visible in the air for each spoken word and Jack Frost is already nipping at your nose.

While this trip had been his idea, Bucky didn't expect to be in charge of plans since you've normally got that part covered yourself, so hiding his panic, he suggests quickly," let's just walk around, 'look at some of the buildings and see if anything interests us along the way."

"Fine by me!" Fortunately for him, you hold no objections, continuing to cheerfully skip along his side.

Bucky tilts his head, holding a thought on the tip of his tongue for a moment before finally daring to speak it,"...can we also check out some of those souvenir shops Rosetta suggested?"

You mock a pout, embracing his arm in yours and giving it a playful tug," oh, I don't know. She said they have a lot of old stuff in there. I would hate for anyone to try stealing you away from me now."

He rolls his eyes," I'm sure you won't have to worry about that."

"Hopefully not or else there'll be a fight! But just to be sure~!"

Bucky stops when you suddenly jump in front of him, holding out your mittened hand high into the air near his face. All the while you wear an impish grin that peeks out from behind your scarf, one that promises only mischief yet that familiar glossy shine in your eyes promises something else entirely; something much softer and genuine.

"Hold my hand."

"Hold...your hand?" For a split second, he almost obeys without another thought. His right hand reaches out as if attached to a magnet being pulled towards yours, however it hesitates midair once he gains control of his senses again.

"Your hearing hasn't gone out yet, that's good," you smirk, blowing air from your nose," yes, I want you to hold my hand."

"Why?"

'Damn, why does he always have to make such simple things so difficult?'

"Because my hand is cold, I don't want you to get lost out here, and I just want to hold your hand. It's been a while anyways," far too long.

Bucky glances at your hand which makes a childish grabby motion, hopeful he'll take the bait for once, but instead, he walks right past you, his hands remaining stuffed inside his pockets as they have been since leaving the apartment.

Frowning, you let your hand fall back to your side in disappointment, yet you would've accepted this defeat without voiced complaint if not for Bucky's hand suddenly clenching yours before beginning to tug you along behind him.

It's a delicate grip, one you can't realistically call a grip at all given how easily you could just slip your hand away, although you know him well enough to understand what it means: the poor thing's afraid of somehow harming you.

Sneaking a curious glance at his face, you notice the hint of red brushing his cheeks which he fruitlessly attempts to hide by the shadow of his tilted hat...Cute.

Walking on your own, you nestle yourself against his arm while taking no shame in your shining smile nor his shy embarrassment as he does nothing to stop you...Adorable.

Old churches, modern museums, and a much needed café break; that's been your day so far. Oh, and the hand holding. That's been wonderful, too. Since the moment Bucky took your hand in his, he's been cursed to hold it for the remainder of the day which has kept both your hand and heart pleasantly warm throughout such an otherwise cold afternoon.

"This has been fun. Excellent choice for a Friday date, Barnes," you praise, taking another sip of your beloved drink. You've had him order the same, offended that he's never tried it before. Trusting you with his life, he complied, although he hasn't commended much on whether he actually enjoys it or not.

Bucky flinches while fidgeting with his own warm porcelain mug. Date...That simple four-lettered word sticks in his head more than he'd care to admit. He almost corrects you, but decides against it in favor of just busying himself by studying the passersby from the café window you both sit next to.

Unfortunately, Bucky isn't as smooth as he thinks and you definitely notice his discomfort. Guilt eats at you, begging you to apologize and insist this is just a friendly date, however feeling that the discussion would only confirm any awkwardness, you comment on something else instead.

"Getting worn out from all this socialization?"

"No-" Bucky presses his lips into a thin line before changing his answer,"...a bit. I just..."

"It's fine. We can finish up here and get back to the apartment," you lean back into your chair with crossed arms," you know, I'm proud of you. You've managed to let loose and be yourself within a public space. That's a big step in the right direction."

His lip twitches upwards at your compliment, although he's hesitant to actually accept it, soon lowering his head with a frown,"...this feels wrong."

You barely hear his whispered words and answer back just as quietly," what does?"

"Being out here with you, having a good time when I...I don't think I-"

"-James Buchanan Barnes," you're quick to lean forward, reaching towards him without actually touching. Instead, you keep your hand near his where it can at least gain his attention," you have every right to enjoy life. It's gonna feel weird and wrong at first, and it might for a while, but that's a part of the healing process, too. You just have to do your best to set aside those negative thoughts and trust in your own happiness.

"You've been having fun today, right? We went to the museum and looked at the art, we checked out the Stavropoleos Monastery which was cool, and you even got to buy stuff at your souvenir shops...What did you get anyways, you never showed me?"

"Nothin' special," Bucky states, tapping his metal finger against the mug with a 'clink'.

"Alright then, keep your secrets," you rest your chin on your hand with a wicked grin as you admire his handsome features. If only this was a romantic date, then you'd have every excuse to decorate his cheeks and lips with dozens of butterfly kisses.

"...What?"

"Nothing," you mumbled.

Something else you've noticed about this Bucky is his easily flustered nature which is very different from the Bucky you once knew. Back in those days, he took every compliment right to his head, adding it to his already steep ego and responding quickly with his silver tongue. It was nearly impossible for you to get the man to blush, but the same couldn't be said about him with you. He always had some flirty reply prepared, well aware of the effect his charm had over you and damn, did he use it to his advantage.

Now, Bucky behaves in a way Hollie never thought possible. While he does admittedly have his smooth moments, he's rather shy and reluctant. You now have no problem drawing that blush from him and can even make him completely tongue tied if you feel evil enough. You don't mind this change, actually. It's cute seeing him so flustered...Maybe that's why 1940s Bucky always teased you so much.

While you're lost in thought, present Bucky shifts in his seat, grabbing the small paper bag hung on its back before placing it on the table. This movement snaps you out of it, your eyes dropping to the object then rising to him in wordless question. He bashfully nods towards the bag which gives you the hint.

As he hides his worry behind the mug he brings to his lips, you peek inside the paper barrier, not seeing anything too well through the shadow, thus you opt for reaching inside. Snatching something, you pull it out carefully to examine it further.

In your hand rests a beautiful Romanian bead bracelet like the very ones you had been observing in a souvenir shop earlier during this trip. Some had plain colors while others had designs with many triangles, but your favorite contained flowers. In particular, you enjoyed the contrast of a white bracelet with red and blue flowers and green stems; the very bracelet you currently hold now.

"That was the one you liked, right?" Bucky's hopeful towards this question, his eyes watching your every movement intensely as you run your fingers over the tiny beads.

"Yeah...I really liked this one, but how did you-?" From what you remember, Bucky had been across the shop searching the book section. You hadn't even been looking at the bracelets long, only a minute or two before going to wait outside of him, so when did he...?

"-I noticed you at the bracelets and even the owner mentioned how much you seemed to like that one, so I figured I'd get it- you know, as a small 'thank you' gift for helping me out so much..." he smiles slightly, glancing at the bracelet in memory. He knows you don't usually focus on yourself much, instead keeping an eye out for him, thus he wanted to do something special to show you his utmost appreciation.

Raising his attention from the bracelet to your face, Bucky frowns immediately, shame and panic filling him at the sight of your tears," w-was I not right? I can get you a different one if you want or-or should I have-?"

"-No, no," you're quick to wipe your sleeve under your eyes, giving a sniff before smiling his way brightly," I love it! Thank you so much, Bucky. It's perfect."

He isn't too convinced, voicing as much," you're sure?"

"I'm sure. It's just..." biting your lip, you move the beads with your thumb in thought. The bracelet truly is beautiful, but it means so much more coming from him," no one's gotten me a gift like this in a while. I'm touched."

Bucky stares at you for a second before carefully asking,"...not even your fiancé?"

You flinch, but shake your head and clear away another tear," well, it's not really his fault. He's been...busy, you could say...but maybe I should tell him about this, huh? Let him know he's got competition and better shape up real soon before you steal me away from him, hmm?"

At this, Bucky rolls his eyes," no, don't tell him that. I don't wanna start a fight."

"Fine, for your sake, I won't say a word," you laugh heartily, pinning the bracelet around your wrist finally and holding it out to get a good look at it in the sun,"...thank you, Bucky. I'll treasure this forever."

He smiles, creating a mental photo of the way your eyes glimmer happily in this moment," you're welcome."

"So, how was it?"

"Today was nice. We went to Old Town for the afternoon and had a lot of fun. Bucky was able to let loose, I had him teach me some Romanian words I immediately forgot, and then we ordered take out for dinner," you list off the events of your day while raising your hand towards the ceiling and staring at your bracelet with a gleeful smile. By the way you've been coddling the jewelry, one might think Bucky had proposed to you again with it.

"And then~?"

"’Then’ what?"

"The sex! How was the sex? I need details."

You feel your face flare, sitting up quickly from the bed with a growl," Natasha, what the hell makes you think we had sex?!"

"Oh, I don't know…You're currently living with a hot guy who you used to be engaged to in your past life, you're so in love with him that you retrained all your memories from said past life just to remember him-"

"-We think that's the reason anyways-"

"-Aaaand you seemed really excited to call me tonight. With all things considered, you really can not blame me for thinking you just got laid!”

"Well, I didn't," you run a hand over your face with a shake of your head. Thank goodness Bucky went to pick up the take out. While you normally have your conversations with Natasha in private so that you can stress all your secret worries to her, apparently you also need to keep him from overhearing this topic, too.

"Really? What's his problem? I figured he'd literally jump at the chance after he found out you're his Hollie?"

"Probably because he still doesn't know that part yet."

"...Oh..." Natasha's silent for a moment," you mean you still haven't told him? (Y/n), how long do you plan to wait exactly? I mean, I understand why you didn't say anything out of the gates, but the two of you have been together for a while now. Don't you think it's about time he learned the truth?"

"It's just not that easy, Nat," you sigh. Deep down, you do feel wrong for not saying anything. It kills you everyday to not be able to have Bucky see you as Hollie. Your relationship - and undying love for him - would be so much easier to manage then, but there's too many ways a reveal could go south.

"Assuming that Bucky would even believe me is a stretch to begin with and even if he does, there’s several issues that could present themselves. For one, I’m only Hollie through memory. What if (Y/n) being Hollie creeps him out so much that he wants nothing to do with either of us - me - whatever?!”

“Or he could see past that little detail and love you for who you are on the inside.”

“Okay, sure, but what about his unresolved guilt towards Hollie? I mean, we’re not talking about him just mourning her death the way anyone else would. As far as he's concerned, he's the one who killed her. No matter what I try to say to convince him otherwise, he blames himself for it and it destroys him inside. What if that guilt remains and he ends up pushing me away with some fucked up reasoning that it’s to ‘protect me’?”

“By telling him you’re Hollie, you’d be telling him as her that you forgive him,” Natasha speaks slowly to not get tripped over all the pronouns,” maybe he’d be more willing to forgive himself then.”

"Yeah…but this is Bucky we're talking about. I don't think he'd move on that easily regardless of whether it's Hollie or (Y/n) telling him to. He’s got catholic-style guilt, Nat!”

“That serious, huh?”

“Yes!”

Now it's Natasha who sighs,"...listen, I understand why you’re scared. I know how scary it can be trusting people with your past especially when they’re someone whose judgment means so much to you, however I also know that the truth will come out eventually. The risk only grows the closer you are to someone and the more you try to keep things hidden. At one point or another, the truth might be exposed and the more you wait to do it yourself, the more you risk it being at a bad time in the worst way.

“Just look at how I found out. We were already on edge with everything that happened then you began acting weird…For a second there, I was worried you were either a double agent or plain insane. In the end, I believed you, but not everyone is going to be as understanding as your super cool best friend.”

You chuckle softly, practically able to see Natasha’s smirk, too.

“Now, I don’t know a single thing about Barnes other than those times he tried killing me, so I’m probably not the greatest judge of this, but based on everything Steve and you have said, it sounds like he really loves you - uh, Hollie that is. Think about how you felt finding out he was still alive? Don’t you think he’d be just as relieved to know his fiancée’s gotten a second chance at life, too?

“Even when talking about (Y/n), Bucky clearly trusts you. Take it from me, there’s no way an assassin would go on a date and hold hands with someone they don’t trust with their life; that’s worth something, isn’t it? He’d be more willing to listen to whatever you have to say, all you gotta do is think of something only Hollie and him would know - something he still remembers about her - and use it to convince him. You managed to convince me as a total stranger to Hollie, so I’d imagine it would be easier to accomplish with someone who truly knew her. He’d be able to confirm for a fact that you’re telling the truth since he knows it himself.

“I’m not going to sugarcoat things. Everything that you mentioned before can happen. He might be really creeped out. He might push you away to protect you. Truthful, you gotta admit, it’s a little-”

“-Weird knowing someone’s practically two different people at once?” You finish with a roll of your eyes," yeah, I've realized that…and I’ve long expected that part. My main concern is just not hurting Bucky. I want him to believe me and, even if he doesn’t want to be together in this life, I want him to move on from Hollie. I want him to know it’s okay to go be happy without either of us…Ultimately, I just want him to have closure…”

You take in a shakily breath, pulling at the bracelet around your wrist. It kills you inside to see Bucky’s guilt and not truly be able to stop it. When he first broke down that day, admitting he remembered Hollie and her death by his hands, you wanted nothing more than to jump at him and kiss away his tears, telling him over and over again how much Hollie loves him, how much you love him…but you couldn’t bring yourself to do that.

“I’m tied to Hollie. Through me, she can finally tell Bucky everything’s going to be okay - that she doesn’t blame him for what happened…Maybe it won’t help him, maybe it will, but at the end of the day, he’ll at least hear it and that’s the greatest push I can offer…He deserves it so, yes, I am going to tell him eventually. Now just isn’t the right time; not while he’s still trying to find his footing. I can’t be the reason his life gets more confusing and chaotic than it already is. I just…We need a little more time.”

Natasha must’ve realized it by now. Yeah, you’re concerned over Bucky’s feelings and you’ve listed every worry you have regarding them, however deep down, this isn’t only about him. You’re scared. Despite every night that you’ve told yourself you’d be okay with him leaving you- with him hating you-, deep down, you fear such an outcome. You don’t want to lose him. You don’t want to feel his hate…So you’re delaying the inevitable until you magically find the strength to face it.

“...Can you just make me a promise?”

“To tell him? Yeah, I-”

“-No, not just to tell Barnes. I want you to eventually tell Steve and Tony, too. I think it’s safe to say Barnes isn’t the only one needing closure over Hollie. Steve went into the ice then woke up decades later with no one and Tony was a child who tragedy lost his only aunt. Don’t you think they deserve answers just as much as Barnes?

“They might not accept it, but if they do, they’ll be able to know they still have a piece of her around…You know, I can’t do much regarding lover boy, but I can always vouch for you to Rogers and Stark; punch them over the heads if they give you too much trouble.”

You chuckle softly, giving her question some thought. Steve and you were close friends in the past and Tony was practically attached to your hip whenever around. Even in this lifetime, you’re close to both of them and you’ve observed their own remaining sorrow over Hollie. They both mourn her, Steve disappearing on his own during any anniversary related to her while Tony still keeps her last present to him on his desk, avoiding any mention of her otherwise. They deserve to know how close she’s truly been to them this whole time…

“I’ll tell them, too. I promise.”

NEXT CHAPTER ➡️

⬅️PREVIOUS CHAPTER

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