#steve rogers 40s
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Birthday Kiss
Summary: It's Bucky's birthday and he decides to spend it with his best friend, Steve, and Steve's little sister, you.
Pairing: 40s!Bucky Barnes x Rogers!Reader, Brother!Steve Rogers x Sister!Reader
Warnings: Angst. Idiots in love. Fluff. Vague mentions to sex. Language 'cause I can't help myself. My poor attempts at being funny.
Word Count: 3.4K
Prompt: "So what should I say?" "when?" "when I love someone." "you should say it"
A/N: Since it's almost Bucky's birthday I wanted to celebrate it with my first fic with 40s Bucky! He's one of my favorite Buckys and I've been wanting to write about him for a while and I finally got this idea! Hope someone enjoys it! In my mind this happens like a year before Captain America: The First Avenger, so Bucky is turning 25, Steve is 23 and the Reader is 21, but you can always imagine any age you want. As always, any ideas for fics are appreciated!
Masterlist
You enter the room to see Bucky is hanging out in yours and Steve's apartment, like he always does, sitting down at the window, smoking a cigarette and reading the evening newspaper while a football game plays on the television in the living room and Steve sits on the couch, drawing on his notebook.
You're used to Bucky being here, he's your big brother's best friend and you've come to be very close friends with him too, even if you wished there was more.
As clichè as it is to have a crush on your brother's best friend, you couldn't help it. He was handsome and funny, and he's always sweet and protective of you.
You've known him since you were 9 years old, and he's the only family you have left other than Steve.
"Is this really how you're going to spend your birthday?" You ask Bucky as you sit on the couch next to Steve.
Bucky turns around towards you with a bright smile, his blue eyes lighting up as soon as he sees you, like they always do whenever he's around you.
He puts out the cigarette and stands up, walking over to you, sitting down on your other side and pulling you into a side hug.
"Hey, doll. I didn't think you were gonna be here today." He says, although he seems more happily surprised by your presence than disappointed.
"I live here, Barnes." You tease him with a smile. "Unlike you."
He rolls his eyes playfully as Steve snickers next to you while he keeps drawing. "I know that. I meant, I thought you were gonna be out with your friends tonight."
"I didn't feel like it." You dismiss him quickly, not wanting to actually say out loud that you'd rather spend his birthday with him doing nothing than go out with your friends, so you try to casually change the subject. "I thought you'd at least want to spend today with Dot."
Dot isn't actually Bucky's girlfriend, they've been on a few dates and you've seen them together a couple of times, but Bucky introduced her to you as a friend so you don't think they're that serious.
Not that Bucky ever is, girls are always all over him and he takes advantage of that. He's a ladies man.
But you try not to worry too much about his love life, not wanting to hurt yourself more than knowing Bucky will never see you like that already does.
"Well, I wanted to spend my birthday with my favorite pair of siblings. She can give me my birthday kiss tomorrow." He says with a grin while ruffling your hair.
"So... What's been going on with you lately, doll? Anything interesting happening in your life?" He asks curiously after a pause, genuinely wanting to know more about your day-to-day activities and experiences.
"I... Well, I went on my first date." You say shyly while playing with the edge of your dress.
Bucky's eyes widen in surprise, his interest piqued by your sudden confession. "First date? Who was it with? How'd it go?" He asks with what seems like excitement but mentally preparing himself to potentially become jealous or possessive no matter who you mention.
"It was fine..." You say quietly, still not looking at him. "It just wasn't... It wasn't what I was expecting..."
Bucky senses something off in your tone and expression, and immediately becomes concerned. He places a gentle hand on your knee, trying to comfort you without making it too obvious.
"What happened, doll? Did things not go as well as you hoped they would? Are you feeling okay?" He asks softly, trying to gauge whether or not you want to open up about what happened during your date and if there's anything he can do to make it better.
You don't really know how to answer his question, so you don't, simply glancing at him before looking away and shrugging.
"Tell me what happened, I'm here for you no matter what. If that guy hurt your feelings or made you uncomfortable, I'll kick his ass for sure." He promises fiercely, his protective instincts kicking into high gear whenever you seem vulnerable or upset.
You giggle weakly at his protectiveness but still don't look at him, so he takes your chin gently but firmly and makes you look at him. "Tell me what happened on your date. Was it some creep who tried to grope you or something worse? Because if he did, I swear to god I will find him and break his fucking legs."
"That's not it, Bucky." You say quickly. "It's just... He just... He wasn't..." You. He wasn't you. That's what you want to tell him, but you can't, so you sigh and shrug again. "He just wasn't my type."
Bucky knew what was your type. He knew he was your type, he has seen you ogle him countless times when he walked past you or sat near you.
He also knew that you had never shown any interest in any of the men who approached you, always dismissing them as not good enough for you. Or at least that's why he thought you did.
Glancing at Steve before looking back at you again, Bucky says quietly. "Well, that's too bad for him I guess."
"It doesn't matter, I'm not seeing him again." I say quietly, avoiding both Steve and Bucky's eyes.
Bucky's brow furrowed in confusion, he couldn't believe you were so quick to give up on a potential relationship just because the guy didn't live up to your impossible standards.
"Doll, you gotta give guys more of a chance. They ain't all as bad as you seem to think they are." He scolds you playfully, but there was also a hint of underlying irritation in his tone as he takes a long sip from his beer bottle.
You glance at him before looking away again. "So... You think I should go on another date with that guy?" You ask quietly.
Bucky thought for a moment, weighing the pros and cons of pushing you to go on another date with the mystery guy. "Yeah, actually. I mean, if you think he's worth giving a second chance, then why not? And if he turns out to be a total dud again, then at least you can say you gave it a shot. But only if you're really sure he's worth your time though. Don't waste it on some loser who doesn't appreciate everything you have to offer."
He advised you, trying to strike a balance between being supportive and challenging you to take risks when it came to relationships. "But whatever you decide, don't let me pressure you into doing something you don't want to do. You've gotta follow your heart, doll."
"You know, Stevie doesn't care this much about who I date, and he's my older brother." You tease Bucky while glancing at Steve.
Bucky snorts in amusement, "Yeah well, I'm not your brother, sweetheart, but I'm your friend and your wingman, and I'll be damned if I'm gonna sit back and watch you throw away a potential chance to be happy. Now come on, make up your mind already. Are you gonna give the guy another chance or not?" He pressed, playfully but determinedly.
You look at his face for a moment before looking away again and sighing. "I'm not." You say quietly but firmly. "I'm not going on a second date with that guy." You clarify.
Bucky felt his jaw tighten a little as he realized that you had completely ignored his previous suggestion and were instead deciding against giving the guy a second chance.
He didn't like the idea of you potentially missing out on something good due to your own stubbornness, but he also knew that he couldn't force you to do anything you didn't truly want to do.
"Well, fuck. Guess that settles that then," He said after a moment of silence, trying to hide his disappointment but failing miserably. "You're really gonna just throw that opportunity away? Fine, suit yourself, I guess. But don't expect me to hold your hand or anything when you get sad because you're alone. You're on your own with that shit."
"I guess I am." You say quietly before getting up from the couch and going to the window, climbing into the emergency staircase to go up to the roof, like you do most nights to watch the stars.
Bucky watches you leave, feeling a mix of frustration and concern as he realizes that you're retreating to your usual spot on the roof rather than staying and talking to him.
He wants to call after you, to make sure you're okay, but he knows better than to push you if you need time alone.
Instead, he takes a deep breath and tries to focus on the present moment, reminding himself that sometimes people need space and time to themselves.
"Fine. Have it your way," he calls after you, knowing that there isn't much else he can do in this situation. "But don't think for a second that I won't be keeping an eye on you up there. You better not try anything stupid."
You roll your eyes but don't stop, going up to the roof, that's right above yours and Steve's apartment, and sitting on the picnic blanket you and Steve use every night.
After a few minutes someone else comes to the roof and you can tell it's Steve by the light steps. "You sure you want to let Bucky alone in our apartment, Stevie? I'm afraid he might burn it down." You joke weakly without turning around to look at him, your eyes locked in the city's skyline.
Steve chuckles and you can feel him sitting down next to you. It's not the first time you sit together on the roof, everybody in your apartment building knows this is the Rogers siblings' spot.
You don't say anything and neither does Steve, and you're especially glad he doesn't say anything when he sees a tear falling down your cheek but simply wraps his arm around you as you lay your head on his shoulder.
"What's going on in your head, little sis?" Steve asks you after you stop crying.
You try to gather your thoughts, trying to find a way to make sense of everything swirling in your head. You take a deep breath before you pull away slightly and turn your head towards the city again. "What should I say?" You ask quietly.
"When?" Steve asks with a frown.
"When I love someone." I clarify looking back at him.
"You should say it." He tells you firmly. It's not the first time you've talked about this, Steve knows about your feelings for Bucky and like a good big brother he always tells you to express yourself. "You should tell him."
You sigh and look away from him and back to the New York skyline. "I don't know, Stevie..."
"Why not, Bambi?" You smile softly at his use of your childhood nickname because Bambi is your favorite book, but then you shake your head.
"Have you seen the way he looks at Dot? I have no chance with him. I'm not his type." You say with conviction.
"You really don't see it?" Steve ask, getting a little frustrated.
"See what?" You ask confusedly while looking back at him.
"The difference between you and her is that he looks at her like she's the prettiest girl in the world," Steve says and your heart sinks so you look away from him, but he still goes on. "but when he looks at you it's like... It's like maybe you're magic. He looks at you with such reverence and respect. He looks at you like if he could just have you in his arms, everything would be okay. Like if he had you, nothing could touch him. He looks at you like he just realized what love is."
Steve pauses and grabs your chin gently to make you look at him before finishing. "He loves you. Anyone can see that. You're just too blind to notice it."
Steve kisses your forehead and then gets up and goes back inside to the apartment, leaving you to think about everything he said.
You lay down on the picnic towel on the ground of the roof and look up at the stars. Could Steve be right? Does Bucky really love you back but you just haven't noticed?
If Bucky had feelings for you, certainly you would've noticed.
Yes, he's protective of you and he's always happy to have you around, but you've been friends for over a decade and he is your brother's best friend, so he probably sees you as just that. His best friend's sister.
But he never did treat you like Steve's annoying little sister.
Even when you were kids he always tried to include you in their games and literally held your hand whenever the three of you went somewhere, like the park a few blocks over.
He would always coo on you when you got any scrapes while playing and kiss your boo-boos away.
He's always been very sweet to you and he stood up for you as much as he did for Steve whenever someone bothered you.
But could that really be actual love? Or is it just affection for a girl he's known since you were little and sees as his own little sister?
You rub your eyes before putting your hands behind your head, getting comfortable while looking at the sky full of stars.
In the meantime, Bucky heard everything from the window of your apartment.
He couldn't deny the truth of what Steve had said, he did look at you with a sense of reverence and respect, like you held the key to unlocking his heart and making everything else in his life fall into place.
But he also knew that he had to tread carefully, to approach you in the right way or risk scaring you off completely.
As much as he wanted to take control of the situation and make things happen on his terms, he knew that he needed to let you come to him, to give you space to process everything that Steve told you and to allow you time to realize how much you actually mean to him.
As Steve climbs back into the window, he gives Bucky a pointed look and a pat in the back, silently encouraging him to talk to you.
Bucky takes a deep breath and then climbs into the stairs, getting to the roof but not getting any closer to you. He's determined to talk to you, but his nerves are getting the best of him.
You can hear Bucky coming to the roof and when he doesn't move closer you frown slightly but think he's just giving you a moment before sitting next to you.
When he stays put for a couple of minutes, you roll your eyes and with a small smile you say "You can come lay down next to me, if you want." Loudly enough for him to hear, your eyes never leaving the stars above you.
Bucky's heart skips a beat as he hears your invitation, and without hesitation he steps forward and drops down onto the towel beside you.
You can tell he's trying to keep his movements quiet, not wanting to startle you or disturb your peaceful contemplation.
He lays there quietly for a few moments, taking in the sight of you lying there so effortlessly beautiful, before finally speaking.
"You have no idea how much I wanted to hear those words coming from your mouth," he whispers and moves closer to you, placing one arm around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder, feeling incredibly vulnerable by the fact that you were so physically close and you were allowing him to get even closer.
"Thanks for letting me do this," he added, indicating the embrace.
"It's not the first time we've watched the stars together, Buck..." You whisper back, resting your head on his while willing your heart to stop beating so fast.
Bucky smiles softly, feeling a warm sense of contentment wash over him as he wraps his arms around you, feeling incredibly grateful for this moment of intimacy between the two of you.
He can feel the gentle weight of your body against his, and it feels like the most natural thing in the world. He listens to the sound of your breathing, feeling his heartbeat slow down as he takes comfort in your presence.
"Yeah, it's not the first time... But it feels different tonight." He whispers back, feeling a newfound confidence and boldness coursing through his veins.
He moves even closer to you, pressing his face against your neck and inhaling deeply, savoring the scent of your skin. "I've always... I've always wanted to hold you like this."
"I... I always wanted you to..." You whisper back hesitantly and bite your lip when he presses his face against your neck, almost scared to move, worried that if you do it'll ruin the moment.
Bucky feels a surge of pleasure course through his body as he hears your response, knowing that you too cherished these special moments with him.
When you don't say anything at his physical contact he continues to hold you tightly, feeling a deep sense of connection growing between you.
He presses his lips against your neck, gently kissing and nibbling on your skin, feeling a newfound desire burning within him that he had never experienced before.
He wants more than anything to take things further, to remove your clothing and explore every inch of your body with his hands and mouth, but he forces himself to remain patient and wait for your signal that you actually want something more intimate.
"You know... I've always been afraid to show you how much I really care about you," he whispers into your ear, his voice barely audible over the sound of the city below them.
"Steve thinks you love me..." You say quietly, hoping to god that your idiot brother is right for once in his life.
Bucky freezes a little, feeling a mixture of relief and surprise wash over him. He's surprised at your boldness but so relieved that the truth is finally out there.
But he also knows you well enough to know that if he wants you to truly believe that he loves you, then he has to act quickly to prove it to you and make sure that you never doubt his feelings again.
"Yeah... I do love you, Doll. More than anything else in this world. And I'm sorry that I didn't say it sooner... But I was afraid to lose you." He admits quietly, as he takes your face in his hands.
"You really mean that?" You ask quietly, a mix of hope and uncertainty clear in your voice.
"I do." He says without hesitation while he looks at your beautiful face turned towards his. "And I want to spend the rest of my life showing you just how much I care about you."
The smile that comes to your face is so bright that it feels to Bucky like the sun suddenly came up in the middle of the night.
"I know you already gave me a birthday gift," He says, referring to the jacket you gave him this morning. "But can I ask you for one more?"
You're definitely curious about what he wants so you nod. "Sure, what is it?"
"Can you give me a birthday kiss?" He asks quietly while brushing a strand of hair aways from your face and behind your ear.
You blush a little and can't help but smile because he wants a birthday kiss from you, not Dot or any other girl, and you nod slowly as you start leaning in.
Bucky meets you halfway and when your lips touch it feels like fireworks, your stomach filling with butterflies while he brings you closer to him while deepening the kiss.
After a few minutes you both pull away for air, breathing heavily while looking at each other. "Wow." Is all he says after a moment.
You giggle and bite your lip. "Happy birthday, Bucky." You say softly and give him a kiss on the cheek before settling back against him, your head on his chest as you look up at the stars.
Bucky wraps his arms around you, kissing the top of your head and then relaxes while looking up too, more content than ever to finally have you in his arms.
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sadbucksblog asked: Ok here’s a thought that’s been running through my head. 1940s steve forcing himself on shy!innocent!reader and forcing her to marry him. Later when reader found out that he ‘died’ (during the plane crash), she was secretly glad. But surprise surprise Endgame steve came back to return the infinity stones n decides to stay with his widow for good.In my head, endgame steve is meaner & more jaded 😈
Oh, definitely!! Endgame Steve gives the most dom vibes out of all his previous versions. If reader thought Steve was bad in the 1940s, she has another thing coming when he returns. His stay in the modern age has corrupted him more and made him kinkier. Like imagine the things he would do against 40s reader now that he knows how to pleasure a woman, because I know for sure they didn’t care about that stuff in the 40s.
18+ ONLY | MINORS DNI
WARNING - Following contains: non-con, explicit smut, forced marriage, misogyny, 40s gender roles, dom/sub dynamic, dom!Steve, unbalanced power dynamic, mentions of somnophilia, slight bondage, dumbification, loss of virginity.
Title: His return
I imagine with this scenario, Steve liked Y/N a lot before he received the serum. You were so sweet and actually nice to him unlike the rest of the girls, but whenever he asked you on a date, you would reject him, saying you only saw him as a good friend.
And so after he got his super soldier strength, he expected you to like him back, because all women love strong and masculine men who can protect and provide for them (at least that’s how the gender norms were back in the 1940s). So imagine to his surprise when you kindly reject him even then after he has become a living female fantasy.
He literally cannot contain his fury and forces himself on you the same day, ignoring your pleas when you beg him to stop because you wanted to save yourself for marriage and give your virginity to someone you love.
“Don’t worry, my love. It’s not a sin if we end up getting married. You will take me as your husband or I’m going to tell everyone how much of a whore you are for spreading your legs so easily for me.” Steve threatened.
You were so scared, and knowing you had little authority in this situation, you did as he said. You knew no one would side with you if you were to protest against the new hero of the country; Captain America.
A month later, the two of you married and became husband and wife. Steve made you into his little house wife, and for each mission he came home from, he would fuck you for hours until you passed out. You were so clueless of the things Steve did to you sometimes, like whenever he would thrust inside of you in a specific angle causing you to feel an arising sensation from your abdomen. You didn’t know what it was, but it felt good no matter how shameful you were of it.
Whenever you accidentally dropped something, like a plate of food or when you burned dinner in the oven because you forgot the time, Steve would punish you by harsh spanking, telling you how bad of a wife you are for messing up your husband’s food. You would cry and apologize profusely until he stopped and left you with a sore butt.
He would also take you when you were fast asleep. You were a light sleeper, and only would you wake up when he jackhammered into you, causing a burning feeling around your sore pussy. Steve was huge due to his bodily enhancement, and it took a while for you to get used to his size. He would hardly talk when he fucked you as his only mission was to cum for relief. Steve was a busy man after all, with the war still ongoing. The weeks he was gone were the most peaceful times of your life ever since Steve took claim of you.
One fateful day, a military personnel visited you at your house and gave you the unfortunate news of the Captain’s loss. You shedded tears, but not because of Steve’s death. It was rather because the nightmare of a life was finally over. You felt relieved knowing Steve could never put his hands on you ever again.
2 years pass by, and you have all forgotten about Steve Rogers. You would occasionally see his face on posters and articles, and while it brought back some of the trauma, you always reminded yourself that he was gone for good.
At least, you thought he was.
It was a day like any other in your small little suburban house that you moved to after selling Steve’s house, and you suddenly heard the doorbell ring to your front door. You shouted ‘coming!’ to whoever was waiting outside, and turned off the temperature of your oven where there were freshly baked cinnamon rolls waiting for you later.
You open the door, and it’s like your whole world shatters before your eyes. There he was, your unmistakably still alive husband standing there. He looked more older, and it was only 2 years ago he was announced dead.
“Hello, my love. Have you missed me?” He asked darkly. You shrieked and tried to escape through the back door, but it was too late. Steve ran after you and grabbed you around your waist and held you down on the floor, preventing you from struggling away.
“That is no way to greet your husband after thinking he was dead for such a long time. I expected better from you, my wife. Maybe you have forgotten who you belong to and I need to give your dumb little brain a reminder.” He said, and carried you upstairs to your bedroom.
He threw you onto the bed like a rag doll and started to tie your wrists with velvet ropes he had brought with him to the headboard. This was new to you from all your previous experiences of having sex with Steve, and it scared you. “S-Steve, what is this?..what are you-!”
“I’m going to fuck you so hard and make you wish you never pulled that little escape stunt earlier. Silly woman, thinking you stand a chance against me. You’re mine, and I’ll do everything in my power to make sure your dumb head understands that.”
He ripped your clothes off harshly, and he unbuttoned his trousers to free his cock from the restraints. You expected him to penetrate you like he always did before. That was the only type of sex you two were familiar with. But this ‘new’ version of Steve had different plans.
Your eyes widened when his face lowered at your pussy, causing you to feel distressed. “W-Wait, don’t do that!…I-It probably smells, I don’t want you to get too close to it!”
“Oh, Y/N, my sweet wife. You’re so clueless. What I did and did not do before I disappeared was when I was a boy. But I’m a man now, and I’m going to teach you so many things of how we can pleasure each other.”
His tongue stuck out of his mouth and he licked a stripe of your cunt, causing you to cry out a moan. You have never felt anything like this before. It almost felt unreal. It only got worse when his tongue glided between your pussy lips, gathering all your juices for him to savour.
“You taste delicious, my love. There isn’t a thing that’s more tastier than your sweet pussy…” he mumbled into your sensitive skin.
Steve never talked like this during sex, and somehow you preferred him not to talk because it made it easier to not enjoy it. This Steve however was making it harder to hate it with each new thing he did, and it made you feel horrible about yourself.
Suddenly, Steve used what felt like his thumb to rub at a particular spot. It caused your whole body to jolt at once like you were electrocuted, and you felt an overwhelming heat spread across your whole body.
“Do you know what this little pearl is, doll? It’s called a clitoris. It’s your most sensitive part of your pussy, and it will only be recognized as what engorges your wetness and surrounds your vagina in 2009 - about 70 years from now on. It also has about 8,000 nerve endings, which is why you become so sensitive when I touch it. Isn’t that fascinating, my love?”
You didn’t pick up a word of what he was rambling about because you were too out of it from his circling motion of rubbing your pearly nub. You couldn’t stop moaning and panting. Again came that familiar feeling of a rising high. Before you knew it, the feeling hit you like a wave and you felt your hole quivering.
“Aaaww, you just came. How cute….” He cooed, with a victorious grin. “Now, let’s get to the main course of this session. Haven’t been in this pussy for a loooong time. And I’m sure you’ve been a good girl not having anyone else inside you, right?”
You didn’t respond to that question, still pretty out of what had taken place moments earlier.
He slapped your cheek lightly but harsh enough to take you out from your daze. “Answer me, whore.”
“N-No! I haven’t, Steve! No one has been inside of me since you disappeared! I promise!” You answered with frantic.
He smiled again. “Good.”
He aimed his cock at your hole and shoved himself in with little care. He groaned loudly, sounding so content with the current feeling. “Oh, I’ve missed her…missed your pussy so much…I’ve missed you..” he said followed with a grunt. “I’m so glad I’m back. Back together with you.”
For the rest of the evening, he would torture you with new tricks of his that opened a new world of sex for you. By the end of the night, Steve had you wrapped in his strong arms, whispering the most obscene things and promises in your ear. Most of them were connected to one promise that made you dread for the future.
A promise of never leaving you ever again.
Note from author: this turned out a lot longer than I originally planned but I really enjoyed the concept and couldn’t help myself. I’m a hoe for endgame AND 40s Steve.🧍Anyways, thank you @sadbucksblog for sharing your idea! <3 Hope you enjoy it!
(This has been reposted here as I have deleted my old account!)
Hearts & Reblogs are very appreciated! <3
#dark steve rogers x reader#40s steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x reader#dark steve rogers#steve rogers x female reader#drabble#chris evans fanfiction
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and they were best friends since childhood...
so, guys chose days ago for 40s stevebucky so here it goes...
my commissions are still open and you can support me on ko-fi
#sorry for the bad quality idk what's happening with me lately#hope you guys liked#that's on yall anyway lmao#bucky barnes#stucky#bucky#steve rogers#captain america#stevebucky#marvel#wintershield#steve x bucky#winter soldier#40s stevebucky#my art#stucky fanart#stevebucky art
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When Bucky hugged Steve for the first time since he got the serum, they were alone in a tent. They had just got back to the base camp after their miles long walk back from the hydra base and they were both exhausted.
Steve is situating himself around the very nice, fancy tent that he insisted on sharing and Bucky hasn't taken his eyes off him since he saw him from the table he was strapped onto. Steve. Little Steve. Steve who got sick every winter and who's asthma played up every summer. Steve who had been 5'4 and had remained as such since he was 14. Steve who got into too many fights and never won but not once for lack of passion.
Bucky has to say something, because he hasn't been saying anything since escaping the base and now he feels like he's about to boil over. "Steve"
The same big blue eyes he's always known greeted him and were quick to lace with concern. "You okay, Buck?"
And generally speaking no, Bucky was not okay, he'd been experimented on, he'd been taken by the enemy and strapped down to a goddamn table and he couldn't even remember half of what they did to him there.
For all Bucky knows he could drop dead at any moment but he isn't thinking about that, because he's thinking about how Steve is here, in front of him, all 6'2 of him. He's thinking about how the breath exiting his mouth doesn't follow with wheezing, or how he can take the full rib expanding breaths when he needs it without coughing until there are tears forcing themselves out of his eyes.
Bucky steps forward, his hand gently presses against the expanse of Steve's chest. He stops himself from gawking considering the fact you could park an eighteen wheeler on this thing, he even opens his mouth to say just that but then he feels Steve's heart beat, steady and pumping under his palm.
It's only slight considering the amount of muscle and thick bone in the way but he can feel it all the same and it's not stuttering and irregular. It's pumping blood, lots of blood wherever Steve needs it, constantly and in all the right places instead of spending most of its time in the lowest point of the body.
If Steve were to get sick this heart would help him get better instead of having to fight to keep itself working, and his new lungs might get congested but they wouldn't spasm every time he needed a breath of fresh air. Steve won't be laying in bed all winter sick and out of his mind with any and every illness that has always loved making his life a living hell.
Steve is healthy.
And suddenly feeling overwhelmed, Bucky clears his throat and blinks away any escaped liquid from his eyes, which are very pointedly looking towards his hand. Because if he looks up at Steve and sees those blue eyes all concerned, seeing right through him like they always do, he really will loose it.
"You're okay.." He mumbles mostly to himself.
It comes off as a statement more than anything and a chocked out one at that but Steve knows, because he always knows what Bucky is trying to get at. He places his hand over Bucky's wrist and just holds him, his hand is steady and must be magical because Bucky grows calm at the touch.
"I'm okay."
Feeling himself falter at the affirmation, he leans in, arms wrapping around the waist he could once circle completely with one arm. But he almost backs out as quickly as he started it, the foreign body giving the wrong signals, like hugging a coworker or a distant relative you see once a decade.
But taking a deep breath to centre himself, Steve smelled like he always did, plus the scent of cheap soap hardly lingering, faded from the long day they both just had.
And when he ran his hands over his back he could feel the familiar humps of his spine and count them all the same. Even Steve's hands find the same spot on Bucky's back as they always used to, where his ribs end and his back start to dip in at the start of his waist.
Bucky can still reach the hair at the base of Steve's head and run his fingers through it like he used to see Steve's ma do when they were young.
Now Steve sighs into the hug and Bucky squeezes tighter since he knows he won't be doing any damage. They stay like that for a long time in their own personal world, the centre of their own solar system, everything else moving around them, floating within their orbit.
When they pull back, Bucky's hands linger on Steve's waist for longer then they should and when he looks up Steve's eyes are so full of admiration but his nose and eyebrows are scrunched up like he's got something to say.
Bucky takes his hands back to his sides. "what?"
"We aren't going to leave each other again, okay?" He says it so sure, like they aren't going to be in the heat of battle every other day but Bucky wants it just as bad as he does so he nods and smiles.
"You're stuck with me pal, I'm not going anywhere"
#and then he fell of a train so yeah#steve rogers#bucky barnes#captain America the first avenger#catfa#stucky#bringing stucky with me to my grave#40s stucky#drabble??#headcanon#ficlet perhaps
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REAAAGHHHHHH‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
#woman you’re WAY TOO CLOSE PEPPER SPRAY#this is my therapy right now leave me alone#steve rogers#captain america#marvel#yes i’m aware the bottom one is 50’s fashion not 40’s#edit: THAT IS NOT BUCKY LMAO#edit 2: it’s confusing cause of the clothes but that actually IS Tony i just didn’t wanna tag his ass. this aint abt him#they went to a 50’s themed party.
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[The Last Night Before War] for the lovely @april2007
Steve and Bucky sharing a bittersweet moment on their window sill in Brooklyn the night before Bucky is sent off to war.
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#stucky#stevebucky#steve rogers#bucky barnes#prewar stucky#40s stucky#40s steve rogers#fanart#captain america#mcu fanart#marvel
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Between the pages of a journal
Pairing: Stucky x 40s!Reader
Summary: You had been in a relationship with Steve and Bucky up until the time they went off to war only to lose them both. Years later when Steve and Bucky have reunited the receive the letters and journals you had written. Through them they learn about your life without them.
word count: 6.0k
Warnings: character death, the blip/snap, implied domestic violence, major angst, some fluff... let me know if I forgot something.
A/N: Not really sure how I feel about the ending but over all I loved writing this and I hope you like it too.
Steve stood with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hands as he looked down at the slightly dirty headstone. One that sat towards the back of the small cemetery with your name on it. His fingers trace over your name after placing the flowers down. The date of your death mocks him. It was the day he woke up. The day that he had come back to life was the day yours had ended. In fact the difference had only been a few hours from the time that you closed your eyes for the last time and the time he opened his.
On good days Steve was grateful for that. You didn’t have to watch him walk back into your life looking as he did all those years ago while you were stuck in a bed, withering away. Wishing you had been able to live the life they had both promised you. On bad days he hated he didn’t get to say goodbye. But he had already been through the process of seeing someone he loved die when Bucky fell off the train. He wasn’t sure he would be able to do that with you. It had been you who begged him not to go. The fear in your eyes when Bucky got his orders still haunts him and it doubled when he told you he had been accepted. Now all that Steve has is the headstone with your name on it to grieve for both of his greatest loves. And he did it often.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hope.
Something Steve hadn’t felt in a long time. It bloomed in his chest the longer he looked at his long lost love. But just as quickly it faded.
“Bucky?” Steve stood in the middle of the street. Chaos erupting all around as he looked at the brunette with confusion and concern.
“Who the hell is Bucky?”
Just as quickly as he was there, Bucky was gone. Steve tried to look for him but there was no use. He had been arrested along with Nat and Sam.
If there was one single word to describe Steve Rogers at the moment it would be determined. As much as it hurt that his oldest friend and lover didn’t recognize him. Steve knew he had to save Bucky. If not for him than for you. It was one of the promises he made to you the morning he left. He would keep Bucky safe and they would come back home to you. At least now he could keep half of the promise.
The next time Steve would see Bucky it would be in a helicarrier. Blow by blow Steve tried to remind Bucky of who he was, what they meant to each other. In the end Bucky walked away after saving Steve. Still it was better knowing he was out and free than knowing that he was still under hydra’s control.
It would take some time but eventually Steve would find Bucky once again. With time and help, Bucky was free of hydra’s control and they slowly rebuilt their relationship. Soon Bucky began to remember you as well.
Now Steve didn’t feel so lost or so alone. The ache of loss was still there but it was made easier when he was able to turn in bed and find Bucky asleep next to him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There were many things Bucky and Steve needed to adjust to in the modern times they were now living in. Being able to love each other without fear of being persecuted was a liberating experience. So they found themselves walking hand in hand on a beautiful Saturday afternoon through a small park in Brooklyn. The same park that the three of you frequented when you didn’t have anywhere else to go.
You always packed a picnic and your journal, Bucky always had a new book to read out loud and Steve always had his sketchbook and pencils. There was one specific tree the three of you preferred to sit under. It was close to a small pond with the best shade and it was surrounded by bushes which afforded you the privacy the three of you craved.
While to the outside world it looked like you were being chaperoned by Steve while on a date with Bucky, the reality was that you were dating them both. This little corner of the park allowed the three of you to be free to love, touch and kiss each other as you wished.
It was this tree that provided cover for the three of you so long ago that Steve and Bucky came to look for now. Where Bucky carved your initials in the trunk within a heart. They hoped the tree was still there and they were gladly surprised that it was, initials included. The only difference though was the fact that there was a wrought iron bench in the once cleared space. Steve and Bucky make their way over.
“Y/N, would have loved to have a bench here.” Steve commented as he sat down.
Bucky hummed in agreement as he inspected the small plaque screwed into the armrest.
“Steve, look at this.”
The blond leans over to look at the inscription. His breath catches in his throat.
‘Til the end of the line.
A couple of tears hit the small plaque. Steve’s chin rests on Bucky’s shoulder and his arm wraps around the latter’s waist. They both just take a moment to look at it and appreciate that you had taken time and money to have this placed here in their honor. It felt like fate mocked them now that it was them that used this bench to remember you. For the remainder of their time in that park Steve and Bucky talk about their past, especially about you.
“Remember when she chased Tommy Phillips down the street with a broom?” Steve chuckled but it took Bucky a moment before he smiled.
“He kept following her home, right? Always tried to ask her out whenever we weren’t there to walk with her.”
“She ran right by me and only stopped because that cop was on the corner.”
Their smiles fade after a moment.
“I wish she were here. She would definitely love all this shit.” Bucky said as he waved his hand around vaguely.
Steve moved closer and gave Bucky a quick chaste kiss on the cheek before resting his head on Bucky’s shoulder. The blond took a deep breath before looking up at his love through his lashes.
“It’s rude to stare.”
“Well it’s not my fault you’re handsome.” Steve’s compliment makes Bucky blush.
“There’s something I want to talk to you about.”
“What is it?”
“I think it’s time we go see her. I know she’ll want to see you.”
Bucky looked up at him with a pained expression.
“What if she hates me?”
“She would never. She’s called me everyday since she heard you were alive.”
“Ok, we’ll go.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Are you sure I look ok?” Bucky asked as the couple stood in front of a door waiting for someone to answer their knocks.
“You look great baby, and trust me she’ll just be happy to see you.”
Steve had cupped Bucky’s face with his hands and leaned in to give him a kiss.
“What the fuck is going on here?”
They parted at the voice.
“Hey, watch your mouth.”
“I can say the same about you James.”
A staring contest happened until Bucky looked down.
“I’ve missed you, Becca.” Bucky said as he looked at his younger yet older sister. She was shorter and her hair was fully gray. The wrinkles were evidence of the time that had passed but the mischievous glint in her eyes told a different story.
She opened her arms and her brother gladly accepted the embrace.
It had been a shock to Bucky to learn that he had one living relative. Well one living sister, he of course knew of the kids all three of his sisters had but he couldn’t seek them out. Mostly for safety but truly he kept his distance because of his guilt. Who would want someone like him in their family?
When they finally pull away from each other in a hug that felt that lasted years and seconds at the same time, Becca cupped Bucky’s cheek softly. Her thumb moved back and forth on his cheek as he leaned into her touch. This time her eyes were full of tears and relief.
“I’ve missed you too. Now come in, we have so much to talk about.” She had grabbed Bucky’s hand like she did when she was younger and they had to cross the street.
They made their way into Becca’s cozy living room and sat down. Steve took the armchair while Bucky and Becca sat together on the couch. The latter started telling both of them everything they missed after they had disappeared, from meeting her late husband to her children and grandchildren. There were tears and laughs exchanged.
“I think we should head out Becs. But I’ll come by again soon.” Bucky promised as they all got up and headed towards the door.
“You’re both welcome anytime.”
They stop at the door, Bucky and then Steve hug Becca. Before the door is opened Becca speaks up again.
“Oh I can’t believe I almost forgot. I have something for you.” Becca shuffled along into the hallway and opened a door to a closet. “I’ll need your help Buck.”
He walks up behind her and she points towards two boxes high up on a shelf. Bucky pulls the first one down and hands it over to Steve before grabbing the second one.
“What’s in here?” Steve asks, his curiosity piqued.
“Letters and journals. They all belonged to Y/N. She wrote the letters whenever she missed you and you know she wrote in her journals all the time.”
Bucky and Steve looked at each other and then back at Becca.
“Why did you keep them?”
“Because she asked me too. The day she passed, I was with her and she asked me if I could hold on to them. Maybe someone would want to know about the love she had for both of you. It broke my heart when it was announced you were back.” She turned to Steve. “She would have loved to see you one last time.”
“What happened to her?”
“I’m surprised you didn’t ask earlier.”
“We never stop thinking about her but it hurts to know she isn’t here anymore.” Steve says with a sad smile.
“When we were informed that you were both gone she was a wreck. Ma forced her to move in with us so that we could be there for her. She would stay up in your room for hours just writing. We could hear Y/N crying for hours on end. This was just her way of coping.”
Both men thanked her again and they were gone. On their way to their shared apartment in Brooklyn they didn’t really talk, each of them holding a box under their arm. It was heavier than anything they’ve carried in the past. It was all that was left of you.
They didn’t know it yet but their heart would break with every single letter or entry of your journal they read.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
March 10th, 1945
My love,
I received your letter last night. I’m so sorry you had to go through that alone. You know Bucky wouldn’t blame you, and neither do I. But please, if not for yourself than for me, take care of yourself. I don’t care that you have that serum, don't do anything reckless. We’ve already lost Bucky, I don’t know if I’d be able to live knowing I lost you too.
I know you think the Barnes’ hate you but they don’t, they’re just as worried about you as they were about their son. They know how much we love Bucky and they can’t wait for you to come back home.
I love you so much. I can’t wait to see you again.
Love,
Y/N
P.S. I’m with you til the end of the line.
Steve tried and failed to swallow the lump in his throat, the tears won as they slowly trailed down his cheek and onto the aged paper. It was a response to the letter he had sent you, telling you about Bucky’s death. He felt so much guilt then, still did from time to time. Once Bucky was free of hydra’s hold he reassured Steve he wasn’t to blame.
Steve was sure you’d blame him too. But the return to sender stamp with the date on the envelope the letter had gotten to him too late. It was just a day after he had crashed the plane into the ocean. Now decades later you gave him peace. Somehow he felt that it wasn’t fair.
That night Bucky held Steve close. Placing soft kisses on his cheek and whispering sweet nothings in his ear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Normally when they didn’t have missions or early training both men loved to stay in bed, pretend the time they were living in wasn’t real, that you’d walk in through the door at any moment and take your place in between them. That your lips would search for theirs and your hands would roam their bodies as gently but demanding as they did before.
This time when Steve woke up the spot next to him was empty. He got up and walked toward the living room, the closer he got the more he could hear small sobs and sniffles. When he rounded the corner he found Bucky sitting in the middle of the room. Letters and journals sat open around him. Bucky was currently reading a journal and when he heard Steve’s footsteps he looked up. His eyes were rimmed red, it was obvious he had been there a while.
“What are you reading?”
“Nothing.” Bucky held the notebook close to his chest.
“If it’s nothing then I should be able to read it too.”
Bucky shook his head as his grip on the journal tightened. He averted his eyes when Steve sat beside him and held his hand out. Reluctantly the brunette moved to hand the notebook over but stopped.
“You have to remember she was grieving when she wrote it.”
May 3rd, 1945
What did I do to deserve this? We were supposed to be planning the rest of our lives. Now I have to plan two funerals. The only thing in those matching empty coffins was my heart.
What am I supposed to do now? Everything I had planned was with Steve and Bucky.
I hate not knowing what comes next and I hate them for making me love them. How could they do this to me? How could they leave me alone?
Steve put the journal down and sighed. He remembers going to the cemetery and finding the headstone that was being removed with his name on it, the one to his left was Bucky’s. He’d never allowed himself to put too much thought into what that must have been like for you. Mostly because he would break his own heart thinking about you mourning them alone. He knew it wasn’t fair and there was nothing that he could do to make it right.
After that day they became obsessed with your writing. There were years worth of it but they decided to pace themselves. Instead of sitting down and reading for hours they instead decided to read one letter and one journal entry a day.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
July 4th, 1945
Dear Stevie,
Happy birthday my Love. I miss you so much but I find some comfort in knowing that at least you and Bucky are together somewhere, hopefully looking down on me. I went to the park today for the first time since you both went off to war. It’s not the same without you here but it was a beautiful day, you would have liked it.
I signed up for an art class and it went as well as you would expect. Everything at my station, except the canvas had paint on it. Even my dress. But I think you’d be proud that I went for it. The little painting I managed to make is hanging up in the living room next to yours. If only we had convinced Bucky to paint something I would have a perfect set.
I’ll never stop loving either of you.
Y/N
P.S. I’m with you til the end of the line.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Through missions and long days of training recruits, both men carried some of your writing with them. As time went by they noticed your shift from grieving to trying to survive. It was a journey for them reading your struggles in your everyday life. Steve and Bucky would be lying if they said they didn’t have a favorite letter or journal entry. There were some that reminded them of the happy young woman they had fallen for. Those were the ones they carried with them.
****
Bucky had been through a difficult mission. He had been confronted by his past again and he was putting his walls up as he sat away from the rest of the team on the jet. Some of the others tried to talk to him but he just kept quiet and his eyes fixated on the wall ahead of him. Sam quietly walked up to him and placed an envelope on the seat next to him and walked away. That caught Bucky’s attention and he turned to see his name in your handwriting. He picked it up and opened the envelope as carefully as he could until he was able to retrieve the piece of paper out.
August 25th, 1946
Dear Jamie,
I took the girls to Coney Island today. I know they wished you could have been here with us. Becca and Elizabeth finally convinced Mary to get on the cyclone. It reminded me of when you made Stevie go on and he threw up afterward.
They had a great time. Maybe next time I’ll try to win something for them at one of those game booths but I’m not as good at them as you.
It was nice to be with them. They’ve grown so much in such a short time. You’d be so proud at how well they’re doing. Elizabeth has started reading all of your books and Mary is starting to like science more. But Becca looks the most like you and she’s taking the role of protective big sister very seriously (wonder where she got that from?). I promise to keep an eye on them since they like getting into trouble from time to time.
I love you so much,
Y/N
P.S. I’m with you til the end of the line.
Bucky smiled as he imagined poor little Mary on the Cyclone. Then his smile got slightly bigger as he recalled the day you had mentioned. You had been so mad at him for making Steve get on. But it didn’t take much to get on your good side again.
Bucky finally looked back up, his eyes meeting Sam’s. He nodded in a silent thanks to his teammate.
It was no secret amongst the Avengers that both men had been in love and dated the same woman at the same time. No one really said anything, except the occasional joke from Tony. Sam and Nat took it upon themselves to ask them questions about you, especially when they seemed to be having a hard time at work. At the mention of your name they could see how the super soldier’s demeanor would instantly change.
Their shoulders would drop, a small smile would appear on their lips but it was the sense of longing Nat and Sam saw in their eyes that really let them know you meant more to them than being just some girl from their past.
~~~~~~~~
They had been more than halfway through your journals and letters when they finally found another interesting entry. There was both a sense of relief and a bit of jealousy as they read it.
June 18th, 1950
I’ve met someone. I’m still not sure how I feel about it but he asked me out on a date. Johnny Richards is his name and he seems kind. Becca has tried to make me say yes that Bucky would want me to move on but I’m not so sure he would, ha! He’d probably pout and cross his arms over his chest and give me his puppy dog eyes to convince me to not go out with him.
Steve looked up to find Bucky sitting exactly how you had described him and he smiled.
I think I’m going to say yes though. He’ll never be Steve or Bucky but I think I deserve to find some type of happiness. We’ll just have to see how the first date goes.
They read the rest of that journal quickly. Your entries talked about how your dates with Johnny were going but mostly they compared him to them. Steve and Bucky weren’t even sure you realized that you were even doing it. With everything Johnny would do for you, you would write down how Steve and Bucky would have done it instead. They found it odd however that the journal was left incomplete. It prompted them to start looking through both boxes again only to come up empty handed. The one thing they did realize was that journal entries picked up in a new notebook with the year 1952.
“That’s almost two years missing.” Bucky finally said after rechecking everything. A sinking feeling in his chest the longer they searched only to find nothing.
“We can ask Becca tomorrow. We should get some rest.”
~~~~~~~~~~
The next morning both men head over to Becca’s home hoping to get some answers. However when she opens the door she isn’t surprised to see them. She dreaded the conversation she was going to have with them but she still ushered Steve and Bucky into her living room.
“What happened to Y/N between mid 1950 and 1952?” Bucky asked, not bothering to sit down. He feared he already knew the answer.
Becca sighed as she reached into the pocket of her robe and produced another letter. She held it out for Bucky to grab. “You should sit.” Is all she said.
December 24th, 1951
Mr. Barnes
Please help me. He keeps hurting me and I don’t think I’ll survive the next time.
Y/N
The writing was sloppy and in the corner there was a faded brown spot. Through tear filled eyes Bucky looked at it closer.
“Is this blood? Becca, is this her blood?” He looked up at his sister with rage and a pain in his chest nothing would ever be able to get rid of.
Bucky and Steve had sacrificed their life only for them to find out that their girl had been hurt and they weren’t there to protect her. They hated themselves. Steve more than Bucky because Bucky had been drafted, he didn’t have much of a choice but Steve? Steve had done everything he could to get into the army. He left you alone and for what?
“When daddy read that letter he was enraged. Called up some old army buddies and they handled it. But Y/N, she was broken in more ways than one. When they got to the house he had beaten her so badly she could barely move. She was in the hospital throughout the new year. When she was released we brought her home again. Then she never left. Y/N took care of Ma and daddy ‘til the day they died.”
Steve was fully sobbing now. No matter what he would have done, one of the people he loved would end up hurt. If he hadn’t signed up for the experiment with Erskine, you wouldn’t have been hurt like this but Bucky would still be in with hydra.
“You can’t blame yourselves.” Becca sighs. “If she could see you now, see that you’re alive and together, that you saved Bucky from those monsters she would be so happy.”
“She suffered the rest of her life because of us. Was she ever truly happy after this?”
Becca looked away from her brother with a small frown on her face. That was all the confirmation they needed to know that you had never found happiness again. They left without another word to Becca or each other.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Steve and Bucky didn’t speak for a while. Anger rolled off of them in droves. The issue was that neither of them knew who that anger was directed at. Was it at themselves or each other? The war, the draft, the serum, or the son of a bitch who dared put his hands on you.
Their relationship suffered, missions almost failed, they were more reckless than usual and it went on like that for weeks. There was no lecture from anyone on the team that could make them see that what they were doing would get them or their teammates killed.
Steve and Bucky had one moment. A single moment when they realized that they weren’t to blame. They apologized and forgave each other for being cold and distant. It’s not what you would have wanted. Just as they were getting back on track Thanos happened and Steve lost Bucky all over again.
~~~~~~~~~~
5 years later
The team had one chance and they took it. They defeated Thanos. Now Steve has another. He checks himself over again and smoothes out his hair. The day was beautiful just how you said in your letter. Everyone was already celebrating the 4th of July. But as Steve stepped out of the alleyway all he could think about was the conversation he’d he’d with Bucky before he left on his mission to return the stones.
“Don’t do anything stupid until I come back.” Steve said with a smirk.
“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.” Bucky replied as he brought Steve in for a hug.
Steve pulls back slightly only to connect his lips with Bucky’s.
“Make sure you find her and make her happy. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be alright.”
“Don’t worry Buck. Everything will be alright.” Steve smiles before heading up to the platform.
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Bucky.” With that final word Steve disappears.
Now here he was just a block away from the park he’d frequented when you were all together. All of the stones were back in place all he needed to do was find you. And that he did. You were sitting on the bench here and Bucky frequented. All of your attention was on the letter you were writing. Steve could recite it from memory now.
He took a moment to admire your form. You were wearing his favorite dress. The one he bought for your birthday right before he left for the war. Your hair was pinned back the way you loved. Steve smiled, you were more beautiful than he remembered. He finally gathered the courage to step up to you and hoped that this would go well.
“Is this seat taken?”
“Yes it is.” You respond without even looking up.
“Are you sure I can’t have a seat kitten?”
Your head snapped up in the direction of the intruder. His voice had been familiar to you but it couldn’t be who you thought it was. His eyes were so familiar to you but it wasn’t possible because the owner of those beautiful ocean blue eyes had died. Still the sense of familiarity made the ache in your chest lessen and the same of your lover slip from your lips.
“Steve?”
“Hi sweetheart.” He said as he sat down next to you.
With hesitant movement you brought your hand up to his cheek. Steve closed his eyes and leaned into your touch.
“Am I dead?”
The question made Steve chuckle. “You’re not dead, kitten, I’m really here.”
The answer made you start to sob uncontrollably and your tears made Steve tear up. He pulls you into a hug and tries to soothe you as best as he can. After some time you finally pull away and look at him. Steve kisses your forehead, then your cheeks and finally presses a long awaited sweet kiss to your lips.
“How is this possible?” You say in between hiccuped breaths. “You died. You-your friend Howard, he showed up and told me everything.”
Steve takes a deep breath and explains everything from waking up in the future to traveling back in time only leaving out the part about Bucky.
“So are you staying?” You look up at him through your still wet lashes.
“I can’t stay-“
You pulled away from him and stood up. Heartbreak and anger rolled through you.
“Why would you come to see me if you’re leaving again? This is so cruel. Do you know how much I’ve cried for you? Since the moment you left to become a lab rat. It wasn’t fair then and it’s not fair now.”
“Hey,” Steve stands and cups your face. “I would never leave you again. I came to get you, if you’d like to come with me.” He pulls out a watch from his pocket.
“What about the Barnes family? I can’t just leave them too.”
“I think they’d be happier knowing you’re with me and Bucky.”
A small gasp escapes your lips as you look from the watch to Steve who’s smiling.
“Bucky? How is that possible?”
“It’s his story to tell.”
“He’s not dead?”
“Nope. He does think that I left him to stay here with you though. But I think we deserve to be together again. So what do you say?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The platform comes to life again a minute after Steve had left. To Bucky’s surprise and slight disappointment Nat appears. He disguises his heartbreak behind a smile as Nat walks down and hugs Sam and then him.
“Glad to have you back.” He whispers into her ear.
“Glad to be back.”
“Come on, I’ll buy you a beer and tell you everything you missed.”
“Buck, aren't you going to wait for Steve to come back?” Sam stopped him.
“Nah, I’m going to grab a drink with a friend. You can come if you want.”
“You’re a jerk, you know that?”
“So I’ve been told. Now let’s go.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bucky got home late. He had been trying to avoid the emptiness. Not only in the home he used to share with Steve but the empty feeling in his chest. It was the punishment he deserved or so Bucky thought. To live the rest of his life alone with only the thought of your and Steve’s happiness. He could make due with that.
Bucky sets his keys in the bowl by the door and takes off his jacket. His thoughts were elsewhere so he didn’t immediately pick up on the fact that he wasn’t alone. Still, he was quick and he pulled the gun he always had on him out.
“You can put the gun down, Buck.” Steve stepped out from the darkened office door. The streetlights filtering through the windows provide the only source of light.
“Steve? What are you doing back?”
“Did you really think I’d leave you alone?”
“But what about Y/N?”
“She agreed with me.” Steve smirks.
“What are you-“ Bucky’s words die on his as you step out from behind Steve. “Y/N.” He said your name as if it was the most precious thing in the world.
Bucky’s steps were slow and heavy, as if the world itself sat on his shoulders. You met him halfway way with arms wide open. Bucky fell at your feet, his arms settling around your hips and his head resting against your stomach.
“Oh honey.” Your body shook as Bucky cried against you. All you could do was run your fingers through his hair. “It’s ok. We’re together again baby.”
You managed to get on the floor with Bucky and cup his face and press multiple kisses over his face.
“I missed you, doll.” Bucky says between kisses. It’s frantic and uncoordinated and desperate.
Steve joins you both on the floor wrapping his arms around each of you. There are more shared kisses amongst the three of you. Someone eventually gets up and pulls the other two along with them. The first night the three of you stay awake just talking and catching up. You tell them things that aren’t in your journals and they tell you about living in the present. Reluctantly Bucky tells you part of what happened with hydra. You can see the guilt in his eyes and all you can do is comfort him.
The sun is barely starting to rise when the three of you finally fall asleep in each other's arms.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
When you did wake up you were disoriented by the room you were in until you remembered where you were. The bed was empty but even back in the past both boys were early risers. You fixed your hair and changed before walking out to find Steve and Bucky. As you neared the living room you heard more than two voices talking animatedly.
“You still haven’t told us what took you so long.” A man said as you got closer.
Steve opens his mouth to answer but his whole face lights up when you turn the corner and stand at the entrance of the living room. The reaction caused Steve’s friends to turn around and look at you.
“I was picking someone up.” Steve says.
“Please tell me you’re Y/N.” The woman had asked and you smiled and nodded.
“Y/N, this is Nat and Sam.”
“I have so many questions. Especially about Bucky.” Sam said as he stood up.
Before he could even stretch his hand out to greet you properly Bucky came up from behind you and wrapped an arm around your waist and glared at Sam. He had flowers in his hand which he presented to you.
“Thank you honey.” You kissed his cheek before turning back to Sam.
“Let me put these in water and I’ll answer all your questions.”
Bucky groans as Sam gives him a shot eating grin. You chuckle and when you come back you move to sit down. Eventually Steve and Bucky sit on either of you as Sam and Nat ask you about what they were like back in the day.
With time this would become a routine until you met everyone on the team, including Howard’s son. They had questions and you had the answers. You were sure to include all kinds of stories, especially the embarrassing ones.
It hadn’t gone unnoticed how much more relaxed and happy Steve and Bucky had been. Bucky smiled more and was more open with others. Steve had handed over his shield to Sam and was starting to enjoy his free time. Bucky was still required to go on missions but it was ok. Whenever he came back from a mission you and Steve doted on Bucky. From having his favorite movie on or playing his favorite songs and dancing in the living room to cleaning him up and cuddling in bed. Life in modern times wasn’t always easy for you but fortunately Bucky and Steve were always there to help you.
You still wrote in your journal and on occasion letters for your loves for them to find. The entries were vastly different from what Steve and Bucky had first read. Your journals remained an ode to the love you had which transcended decades and heartbreaks and loss. Now they reflect your joy, love, hope and happiness. The love you had for each other grew with each passing day and you were able to build the home the three of you always dreamed of.
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#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#steve rogers#steve rogers x reader#Steve Rogers x reader x Bucky Barnes#Stucky x reader#stucky one shot#stucky fanfiction#stucky fic#Steve Rogers x Bucky Barnes#40s!reader
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#james bucky buchanan barnes#bucky barnes#sebastian stan#steve rogers#captain america#the winter soldier#40s bucky#tfatws#i need heeeeelp#i love him#k bye
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What If: Captain America Were Revived Today? #44 (April 1983) by Peter B. Gillis and Sal Buscema; Original Image by John Romita Sr.
In this What If? Marvel tale, Captain America is unfrozen in 1983 rather than the 1960s. Without the leadership of Steve Rogers, The Avengers disband. Meanwhile, a Captain America imposter, who calls himself a "real American," has decided to use his newfound influential media status to publicly support a National Identity Card to "deal with illegal aliens,” to suggest that members of civil rights groups "ought to think seriously as to whether or not their actions contribute to the strengthening of communist enemies," and declare that if those groups tear the country apart with protests, martial law is justified "for the peace to find a solution.”
Neighborhoods with large black populations (e.g., Harlem) are walled off and forced into poverty, and one character even mentions that Jewish people are being “put back into camps.” The right-wing politicians make sure that things like this aren’t shown on television, keeping the majority of the American public ignorant of the horrors committed with their indifferent support. The public are simultaneously told that with some sacrifices, America can be free once again. The fake Captain America confronts a group of peaceful protestors, and he is shot by a sniper (in what reads like an inside job), allowing the police to have “reason” to attack the protestors. The imposter does not die and instead uses the attack to provide more reason for the violent crackdown against protesting groups.
When the true Captain America is unfrozen, he is horrified to see what America has become, especially with his emblem stamped all over it. He immediately seeks out the resistance forces (who clearly represent the Black Panther Party) and joins their cause, stating that "the wrongs [he's] seen will take much more than one man to right -- but [he's] got a name to clear, a costume to unsoil-- and a country to die for!!"
By the time Steve joins them, the resistance only has one chance left to stop the American downfall: a political convention where the "America First" party will be able to secure its support to sweep the national elections and allow them "to return America to the pure and great nation [the] forefathers envisioned."
The resistance strikes just as the convention begins. The Captain America imposter is no match in a fight against the true Captain America -- especially against a Steve Rogers who's fucking pissed. ("Get up so I can knock you down!!")
With the imposter knocked unconscious, Captain America addresses the convention crowd, warning that an America that does not represent all its people does not deserve to exist at all; that liberty can be "as easily snuffed out [in America] as in Nazi Germany" and "as a people, we are no different from them."
The crowd realizes that the man speaking before them is the true Captain America and cheers. Captain America holds his hand up and silences them, stating that he will not allow them the chance to simply replace one idol with another. He alone can’t undo the horrible damage, and he pleads that there’s still a chance for the people to “find America once again.”
Fascism doesn’t change its tune, just its singers.
A 2021 Marvel Trumps Hate ( @marveltrumpshate ) commission, completed on 22-count aida cloth with embroidery floss and watercolors on a 9" diameter bamboo hoop.
#captain america#Steve Rogers#hand embroidery#fuck fascism#if you don't think cap says 'trans rights' then you're a fascist#i reread the issue to write the summary and it is a powerful stand-alone story#40 years later and still relevant#a part of me was worried that it wouldn't translate well to current events and.... welp#the commissioner asked that i make one minor change of 'freedom of all men' to 'freedom of all people'#i think that is a very appropriate update and i think 2023 cap (and good cap writer) would support the change#i know this is a super long post with a lot of image text -- if someone wrote Image ID text for me I'd be super grateful and i'll reblog it!#embroidery art#textile arts#embroidery#needlework#needlecraft#comics#mixed media#my work#also just let it be known that the first thing steve rogers says when he wakes up is:#'all right nazis! what have you done with Bucky?!'#(the Bucky in the issue is a fake too)#(the real Bucky will still be dead for another 20 years :(((((( )
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⸺ 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐄
𝟰𝟬𝘀!𝗦𝗧𝗘𝗩𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗚𝗘𝗥𝗦 𝘅 𝗙𝗜𝗟𝗜𝗣𝗜𝗡𝗔!𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗘𝗥
𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 — thanks to the super soldier serum, steve gets to appreciate your body in a way he never had before.
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 — 18+ ONLY; MDNI. porn without plot. smut: penetrative sex, dirty talk, multiple orgasms, creampie, copious amounts of cum bc i’m disgusting, pussy drunk steve.
꒰ ͜͡➸ 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐎𝐘𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘, 𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐀 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆! 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒❜ 𝐁𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃 & 𝐁𝐔𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑! ♡
PUFFS OF AIR TICKLED your ear as sharp exhales left your lover’s body.
You too felt as if the oxygen had been drawn outside of your tiny little room in your shared Brooklyn apartment. You were lightheaded as Steve vigorously thrusted in and out of your cunt, the newfound heaviness from him and the heat radiating from his body still an unfamiliar furor to you. His hands were significantly bigger and meatier, able to engulf both of your wrists in one and pin them above your head. His chest was broader and fuller, the wall of muscle fiercely protecting the thumping heart that lay beneath it. His legs were longer and robust, never faltering despite the immense pleasure he felt while he was inside of you. And those arms. The arms that held you every night were large and burly. Nonetheless, they were feelings you welcomed with
He was still your Steve.
You knew he was when he removed his dewy face from the crook of your neck and stared right through your soul with those crystalline eyes. He gazed at you like a man seeing the sun for the first time. And perhaps he was. With his newfangled heightened senses, Steve could now view your beauty without interference. You resembled Aphrodite reincarnated as you lay underneath him, features twisted into an expression of pure ecstasy. Your skin glowed in the candle light exquisitely, the tiny beads of sweat resembling tiny crystals shimmering against you. You were something straight out of a renaissance painting. Only no one else would see you like this, needy and wanton. Just him.
Like a shark sniffing out blood in the ocean, all rational parts of his brain shut down as his nose picked up the barest waft of your arousal. His jaw clenched as his pupils dilated. Steve’s clear-water ocean blues now donned a deeper shade, the kind of blue that made you fear what lurked below the undiscovered waters.
“Fuck,” Steve groaned, his eyes involuntarily rolling to the back of his skull as your velvety walls squeezed his member when the tip of it hit a particular spot within you. “Fuck, sweetheart, I can smell you.”
A part of you felt embarrassed for a brief moment, the overly self-conscious part of you snapping you out of your trance. But then you looked up and were met with the sight of the love of your life plowing into you anomalistically, looking the most feral you had ever seen the golden boy look through the entirety of you knowing him. His gilded locks were a mess, pieces sticking to his sweat covered forehead. His head was slightly bowed, shoulders hunched as he slowly began to lose control.
“You feel so fucking good, baby,” Steve whispered. “I didn’t think you could even feel any better—”
Releasing your hands from his vice grip, he grabbed hold of your hips for purchase. You could feel your delicate skin bruising under the pads of his fingers. Your Steve was not fully cognizant of his strength quite yet, you knew he could never leave a single mark on your body unless you begged for it. Yet, you cared not. His ferociousness was unleashing something within you. You liked watching him lose control in his new body of his that defied limitations. You were experiencing all of these newfound sensations right alongside him.
Your body jerked violently against the bed from the force behind each impel. With a sharp gasp followed by a string of pornographic, staccato cries, you outstretched your arms to pull him to you. Your vermillion varnished nails sunk into the meat of his back as he pressed his forehead to yours.
“Look at me, Stevie,” You begged, swollen lips brushing against his. “Please.”
As if he was under your spell, his eyes snapped open to meet yours. A small whimper escaped his lips, his eyes falling shut for just a split second before he forced them open again, unable to look away from you for the life of him.
“I can see you,” He breathed in awe, eyed widening. “Holy shit, I can really see you.” His gaze trailed your body before finding its way back up to your face. “You’re so fucking beautiful, sweetheart. The prettiest thing I have ever seen. Look how well you take me.”
It was your turn to whimper, his honeyed praises and the precision of his thrusts a deadly combination. Steve was right there with you. His nerves felt like they were on fire in the best way possible. Every vein on his cock was hypersensitive, highly receptive to every drag against your walls. He crashed his lips against yours as he lost control, shooting his load inside of you. Your own reverie hit you like a bus the second the first rope of cum painted your cavern. You mewled into his mouth, embracing him tightly as you felt his large body tremble. His moans turned into deep, guttural growls as he fucked his spent into you. Steve’s body fell forward weakly, his muscles turning into jelly as your pussy twitched around him.
With another growl and wave of trembles, he came once more. He sloppily continued to pump himself in and out of you, creating a mess where you were adjoined.
"Stevie,” You murmured, pressing kisses against his shoulders, chest, and neck as he came down from his high.
He went completely lax against you, resting his head on your chest as he wrapped his arms around you. With an ear flushed against your bosom, he listened to the sound of your heart with a clarity he never thought was possible. It was his new favorite song. Once its rampant pounding reached a ritardando, he lifted his head. His own heart swelled as he admired you in your afterglow. You belonged in the Sistine Chapel to be rightfully worshipped. Or perhaps in a Greek mythology book.
And yet, here you remained. With him.
Your eyes met his, and the two of you giggled in shock and disbelief. You nuzzled your nose against his before kissing him sweetly.
“This…This isn’t throwing you off?” Steve asked innocently.
You could not believe he had the sheer audacity to even ask you that after what had just occurred, but he wouldn’t be Steve if he didn’t. That was all the confirmation you needed.
“You’ll always be my Stevie.”
© all rights reserved to honeystevie
#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x woc!reader#steve rogers x filipina!reader#steve rogers x y/n#steve rogers x you#40s!steve rogers x reader#40s!steve rogers x you#40s!steve rogers x y/n#40s!steve rogers x woc!reader#40s!steve rogers x filipina!reader#chris evans x reader#chris evans x you#chris evans x y/n#chris evans x woc!reader
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Bucky Barnes Masterlist
Series (3+ parts)
Broken - finished
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Bonus Part
2-part shots
I love you and I hate it
Part 1 | Part 2
Meet the Guardians of the Galaxy
Part 1 | Part 2
Sargeant Grumpy
Part 1 | Part 2
One-shots
On Thin Ice - Figure Skating AU - requested
Mornings Like This - requested
Love Is A Battlefield
New Year's Eve
Back To You - alternative ending
Happy Birthday
Birthday Kiss - 40s Bucky
Can I Be Him?
Not So Bad
Sputnik - requested
Obsessed
Stargazing
#bucky barnes#avengers x reader#bucky barnes x you#sam wilson#steve rogers#shuri#clint barton#tony stark#peter parker#morgan stark#natasha romanoff#scott lang#pepper potts#tchalla#avengers x platonic!reader#bucky barnes au#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes one shot#black panther#bucky barnes oneshot#guardians of the galaxy x reader#marvel fanfiction#40s bucky barnes#literaryavenger's request#wanda maximoff#thor odinson
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Happy Birthday Buck!
#bucky barnes#stucky#steve rogers#40s bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanart#40s steve rogers#steve rogers fanart#stucky fanart#march 10#happy birthday bucky barnes
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I wanna be yours
♡ Pairing: 40’s!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader, 40’s!Pre-serum Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader
♡ Summary: You were childhood friends with Steve and Bucky. You had always had a small crush on Bucky. But now as your older, you realize that harboring a crush on Bucky is hard. Especially watching him flirt with girls that aren’t you.
♡ Warnings: very cheesy, angst, fluff, mentions of alcoholism, mentions of parent death
Smoothing down her dress, she took a last look at herself in the mirror. She was excited to finally go out with her boys, things had been rough at home with her dad, resulting in her seeing Steve and Bucky less.
Switching off her room light, she was flying down the stairs, catching herself from falling by the last step.
“Quit running down the stairs, ya gonna crack ya head open one of these days.” Her father announced from the couch.
“Sorry daddy, just excited.” She giggled, fidgeting with the end of her dress.
Standing up, he set down the whiskey bottle, walking over to her.
“Where ya going?” He asked her, receiving an eye roll.
“Dad, I told you this morning.. I’m going to the Stark Expo thing.”
“Oh yeah..” He muttered, scratching the back of his neck for forgetting. “When ya gonna be home?”
“I don’t know, I haven’t seen them in awhile— I wanna spend some time with them.” She said solemnly, not wanting her father to feel guilty for being the reason why.
“By them, you mean Steve and James?” He asked with a raised brow, not particularly fond of his daughter hanging with those boys.
“Steve and Bucky.. yeah.” She corrected him, slipping on her boots.
“I don’t like em.” He mumbled, uninterested and heading back to his spot on the couch.
“You never did.” She huffed, walking towards his sitting form.
Her body sagged at the sight of him nursing yet another bottle, grimacing she straightened her posture and slapped on a fake smile.
“I gotta go, love you daddy. I won’t stay out too late.” She promised him, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.
“Yeah.” He breathed out, letting his gaze focus on the wall in front of him.
She knew her mother passing would be extremely difficult for him, they had loved each other wholeheartedly, truly made for one another. He had gone downhill mentally, killing himself slowly with the aid of alcohol. Nights on end she’d find him passed out, bottle never scattered too far away from his limp grasp. And it was always the same, he’d feed her empty promises that it would never happen again.
She would never disregard his feelings, but she had lost her mom too. She never had time to fully process her mothers passing, having to babysit her almost always drunk father. All she knew, was that she shouldn’t be living her youth like this. But she could never leave her father.
Feeling the familiar burn in her nose, she took a deep breath, trying to keep her emotions locked away. Not wanting to ruin this night, plus she didn’t want to mess up her makeup.
____________________________
Half walking, half running, she was eagerly trying to make her way to her boys. When suddenly, a loud crash alerted her. Walking closer to the alley behind the theater, she spotted Steve in a defensive stance, while a much larger man laughed, winding his fist back.
Ignoring she was outmatched, she sprinted, jumping on the mans back, slapping the sides of his face harshly.
“Hands off him!” She shouted.
Taken by surprise the man grunted from the impact of their bodies colliding, wincing as his skin stung from the hard smacks. Growing annoyed, he reached behind his head, grabbing a fistful of her hair and swinging her around to his front, finally getting a glance at his attacker. He smirked disgustingly, pulling her closer.
“Well, I sure do like a girl with some fight.” He practically growled into her ear.
Thrusting her knee up into his crouch, he released her immediately, stumbling back into Steve who caught her. Doubling over, he hissed angrily, straightening back up to face the two.
“You bitch!” He spat, ready to advance towards them.
Steve quickly shoved her behind him, throwing a wobbly punch towards the man, only for him to catch it and strike him across the face, sending him back into the trash cans face first.
“Hey!” Bucky shouted, pulling the man by his sleeve towards the alley entrance. “Pick on someone your own size.”
(Y/n) seeing the bully was taken care of, she kneels down to check on Steve.
“Stevie, you okay?” She asked worried, grabbing his chin and tilting his head side to side, checking the damage.
Steve embarrassed, gently pushes away her hands, making her frown.
“I’m fine.” Steve tells her, not making eye contact.
“What were you thinking?” She hissed, angry at him putting himself in danger.
“Oh yeah, I just love getting beat up (Y/n).” He spat back.
“Can you just not get in a fight for one day?”
“Can you just shut up?!” He shouted, while (Y/n) was taken aback.
“Hey, that’s enough!” Bucky stepped in finally. “Steve, come on man. She cares about you.”
Steve felt his anger fade at the sight of (Y/n)‘s saddened form. He felt bad for being mean after not seeing her for a long time.
Bucky gave Steve a look, turning to (Y/n) fully.
“You alright doll?” Bucky asked her softly, lifting her chin with his fingers, making her cheeks heat up.
She loved it when he called her that.
“Yeah, I’m good buck. Just a tender scalp.” She replied, rubbing the back of her head, soothing the sore skin.
Bucky smiled at her toughness, pulling her into a bone crushing hug.
“I’m sorry, (Y/n).” Steve spoke.
“It’s fine Stevie.” She assured him, not wanting to drag out the argument.
When he pulled back, it dawned on her (and Steve) that he was in uniform. And he looked so damn handsome.
Steve and Bucky were talking back and fourth, while (Y/n) was practically drooling over his new look. Taking him all in head to toe, and she realized that him like this was doing things to her.
It only took a few extra seconds for her to realize what this meant, and her face dropped.
Before she could comment on her concerns, Bucky had pulled Steve and her to his sides.
“Gotta get Steve cleaned up, doll.” Bucky told her, watching her cheeks grow red.
“Where are we going?” Steve asked him.
“The future.” Bucky said cryptically, making (Y/n) and Steve laugh.
________________________
(Y/n) was shaking with excitement, getting time with the boys, going to the Stark Expo. The night was going great, until it wasn’t. Bucky had brought along two girls, dates for both him and Steve. She was offended at the audacity, spending his night with two random strangers. She missed when it was just them three.
Yes, she realized that Bucky couldn’t read minds and he had no idea of her feelings for him. But that didn’t stop her from being upset, she did however try her best to not let it show.
Unfortunately the girl Bucky had brought along for Steve wasn’t interested, and instead clung to Bucky. Now having two girls swooning for him. The girl holding hands with Bucky squealed in excitement, pulling Bucky along to watch the show ahead. Leaving Steve and (Y/n) behind, dragging their feet.
“Yup.. this is so much fun.” She mumbled, trying to come up with an idea.
“What’s wrong with you?” Steve asked, offering her popcorn from his bag.
“Thanks.” She grabbed some, “It’s just.. why did he have to bring.. them.”
“No idea, but she definitely doesn’t like me.” Steve said, keeping his head down.
“Ignore her Stevie, she doesn’t realize how awesome you are.” She told him, making his scoff.
“But that can’t be the reason why you’re in a mood.” Steve said blankly.
“Sure it can.”
“No, it’s something else.” He insisted, making (Y/n) roll her eyes.
“Definitely not.” She fired back, her eyes locking with a handsome stranger from far away.
“Mhm.. you’ve got that look you get when you have a bad idea.” Steve pointed out.
“Okay just this once.. you may be right.” She agreed, but wanted to follow through.
_____________________
Bucky was talking with the two girls, aware that (Y/n) and Steve had wandered off. He didn't want to ditch the girls, but all he really wanted was to spend time with his two friends. Thinking about it, (Y/n) had been off ever since he introduced her to the girls, and it made him wonder.
Just as Bucky was about to excuse himself, to try and find his two friends. He spotted (Y/n) walking over, her arm hooked with a random guys.
She had watched Bucky's face go from confused to annoyed in a second, making her smirk deviously.
"Hey Buck, mind if we join you guys?" She asked, suddenly all happy and willing to hang with the girls. Bucky tried to force a smile while he glared at the man.
"Who's this?" Bucky asked her, raising his brows.
"Oh right, this is Danny." She told him.
"My names actually Don." The guy corrected her shyly.
"Same thing." She muttered, kicking the side of Don's leg.
Bucky watched the interaction between the two with a confused look, was he was missing something?
"Hey Sarge, can we go dancing?" One of the girls asked, batting her eyelashes. Making (Y/n) clench her teeth.
"Of course. (Y/n) you wanna join?" Bucky asked, side eyeing Don.
"We, would love to." She said a little too harshly, emphasizing the we, making sure he got the point.
Bucky nodded, still confused at her behavior. Had he done something wrong? He didn't understand the switch up. What he was sure of on the other hand, was that he did not like Don touching her.
Before she could walk away, arm in arm with Don, he stopped her.
"Hey (Y/n), can we talk?" Bucky asked her, watching her defensive posture melt and she nodded, excusing herself from Don.
Making their way to a more secluded spot, (Y/n) was the first to speak.
"Can we hurry this up.. uh, got a hot date waiting." She said, trying to sound uninterested with wherever this conversation was going.
"What's going on doll? You've been acting…off." Bucky started with, not sounding like himself. She's never thrown herself at guys like that, and he didn't like it.
"I'm not, just found someone I might like." She told him, crossing her arms over her chest.
"You barely know the guy's name." Bucky argued, watching her cheeks grow red from being called out.
"So? You barely remember the names of the girls you've been with." She shot back, seeing Bucky be taken aback.
Bucky had it hit him there, she was jealous. He tried not to smile, but he couldn't help but think how adorable she looked, at all her effort in trying to make him jealous. Which kind of worked.
"Are you jealous doll?" Bucky teased, watching her swallow and her cheeks grew a deeper red.
"Hell no, and don't call me that." She told him, her heart beating erratically.
"Doll, what's going on?" He asked her again, but less teasing and softer.
(Y/n) took a deep breath, knowing that if she was ever going to tell him, it best be now. She didn't want to wait for him to get back from war, or worse... never get the chance.
"I don't like that you brought those girls around… okay?” She started, looking down at her boots, kicking pebbles around.
Bucky lifted her chin, urging her to continue. Swallowing nervously, she decided this was it. No going back, this could ruin their friendship.
"I wanted to be your date... I wanna be yours." She quieted down at the last part, embarrassed. She knew he most likely didn't feel the same way, and from his silence, her eyes started to water.
"(Y/n), can you look at me." Bucky asked her finally, his heart breaking at the sound of her sniffle.
She inhaled deep, her bottom lip quivering, buried emotions deciding now was the best time to show. But otherwise looked up and met his steel blue orbs, ones that held no judgment.
"I’m sorry for never saying anything, guess I was confused too. But you’ve always had me wrapped around your finger, hate that I didn’t see it sooner.” He confessed, keeping her gaze in a gentle, affectionate hold.
“You want me too?” She asked shyly, not believing what she was hearing.
“Doll, I want you… all of you.” He told her, stepping closer, wrapping his arm around her, pushing on her lower back. Their fronts meeting, she faintly gasped.
“I don’t want you to leave me.” She whispered, a tear escaping through her lashes, but was quickly wiped away by Bucky’s thumb.
“I don’t want to either, but I promise I’ll come back to you.” He declared, pulling her shaking form even closer. “Now i’ve really got something to fight for.”
With a sad smile, (Y/n) stood on her tippy toes, giving Bucky a lingering kiss on his cheek. Making his stomach flutter with excitement.
“Now, why don’t we find Steve and get out of here.” He suggested, wrapping his arm around her waist, keeping her trapped against him.
“What about the girls?”
“Don’t worry about them. Plus i’ve got my girl right here.” He told her, watching her cheeks grow red again, which he would never get over. Loving the effect he had on her.
“And Don?” She teased, earning a chuckle from him.
“Don’t care, you’re mine.” He told her, giving her an adoring look, loving the way he could say she was his now.
Deep down they had always loved each other of course, but now it was something fathomless. They had already gotten a crumb of what things could be like now, and they craved more.
A/N: poor don deserved better😭 thank you for beta reading @foreverrandomwritings 💕
#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes#40s bucky#light angst#fluff#cheesy#marvel#marvel imagines#oneshot#reader insert#james buchanan barnes#the winter soldier#sebastianstan#steve rogers#pre serum steve#40s steve rogers
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a good man
summary: Steve Rogers will make sure your image is impeccable, whatever it takes
Pairings: Dark!40s!Steve Rogers x naive! Barnes! reader
Warnings: 18+ content, noncon, loss of virginity, rough smut, dark themes, slight blood play, degradation, forced marriage, mean! Steve
the bitch is back!
After your brother died, Captain Steve Rogers promised your Ma he would take care of you. After all, your father had died when you were young and your Ma’s health was quickly deteriorating. On a cold winter day, her heart couldn't take it anymore, and she made Steve promise he’ll marry you to a good man and keep you in line. Steve, who had grown fond of Winnifred after Sarah’s death and loved her as a mother, said he would do everything to ensure her death wish. So he took you out to every high class party to celebrate the end of war, presented you to all his high-rank officers and bought you the nicest dresses in town, along with a house of your own.
Your little poor girl heart grew infatuated with the gifts and lavish things, building the courage to ask for more and more over time, but always sweet and grateful. You barely noticed how Steve’s gaze darkened after you turned, mind imagining for too long how you'd look with the lingerie that you had shyly asked for, hiding the satin in your clenched hands before grinning devilishly and running to the dressing room when he agreed. Or how he would shadow over you as any man actually tried to make a move on you, scaring them off at the slightest chance.
He didn't understand why he made his life harder, as he had promised to marry you off. But none of those men deserved you, they were either going to be too rough or too forgiving. God help the terrified look on your face when a man was trying to impress him, talking about the discipline he’d enforce on his future wife. But he also couldn't get you a permissive husband, as he knew the mischief inside of you. The lustful and flirty side that was too naive to men’s evilness.
Steve believed that he needed to find someone like himself, hard but loving. He would spank your ass raw if you misbehaved, but hug you and kiss you afterwards, telling you how much of a good girl you were for enduring your punishment. He found himself dreaming about it much more than he’d like to. And sometimes, when he tossed and turned late at night, he found himself dreaming of how you'd look wriggling beneath him, face flushed and eyes slanted as your mouth parted in a perfect “O” shape. Sometimes, tears ran down your eyes and your breathing was desperate, and you were gently begging for him to get away. He liked the intrusive thoughts more.
So in a particular New Year's Eve party, he was drowned in a monotonous conversation with Peggy’s parents, who kept hinting at their expected marriage proposal. Steve liked Peggy, she was intelligent and beautiful, but she would never be tamed into the daily life of a housewife. But he had to smile and nod, for America’s golden boy couldn't be rude.
Little did he notice how you preened and blushed under Howard Stark’s comments, his mouth dangerously close as he whispered in your ear -which he claimed was because of the loud noise- about how fun it would be to spend New years somewhere else, because he “hated crowds”. Your empathetic soul was quick to feel sorrow for him, and before eleven o’clock, you were heading to your residence in a preppy Brooklyn neighborhood, right next to Steve’s.
When the clock was about to strike 12 Steve began to search for you, in order to give you a big hug where he would be able to hold you tightly against himself. But as the crowd gathered in front of the clock, he realized he couldn't find you, Howard Stark or his car. He cursed all the way, icy blues stuck to the road as his knuckles turned white from his grip on the steering wheel as the parties started to dwindle down.
You were dancing in your living room down to your undergarments with the brightest mind of the century. A whole bottle of some unknown liquid laid on the floor as he ran his hands dangerously close to your rear, sloppy kisses interchanged. You almost peed yourself when the door slammed open, the huge form of your older brother's best friend storming in in a maddened haste. His usually gelled back and controlled hair messy as he peeled back your frame from Howard’s, slapping you to the floor hard enough to sober you up in fear. He then turned to Howard in scary calmness.
“I'll resolve this matter with you afterwards, now leave.” He ordered, and the scientist obeyed, head low from pity or regret, you wouldn't know. You were too scared to actually say anything. The moment the front door closed, Steve was marching towards you. His strong hands pulled you up in a death grip. This wasn't sweet ol’ Stevie that bought you everything your heart wished for and was slightly creepy sometimes.
“Do you have any idea of what you had just done?” He barked and you trembled, tears forming in your eyes, but pride still stuck on your throat like a ball. He looked at you in disbelief, how could his sweet girl act so slutty? “Not even whores invite men into their houses-not to mention that this house isn't even yours- and dance around naked!”
He attempted to pull your bra to emphasize his point, but with his new superstrength, he ended up ‘accidentally’ ripping it. He stopped for a second, as if to think what could happen now. And you laid there, eyes as big as weeping saucers and hands shaking as your lips trembled. In a fast motion, Steve threw you over his shoulder. You heard the clicking of his belt coming undone, the thick brown leather coming to view as you whimpered in fear.
He didn't say a word until you reached the bedroom, where he tossed you face down on the mattress, one hand firmly planting your head on the bed. He somewhat regretted that, as he would have preferred to see your gorgeous face.
“Everyone tomorrow will see you as a floozy, are you proud of that?” He asked, but you were too ashamed to answer. After seconds of silence, you felt the flames of hell lick the skin of your backside and a fast, snapping side. You cried out in pain. “Promised your Ma I’d take care of you, spoiled you too much, and this is how you decide to pay me?”
You whined in pain, but did not dare to answer him. Another hit was whipped, on top of the previous one, and you dug your nails on the sheets.
“WIll have to marry you to the first oblivious man that comes across for you to still have some fucking honor, is that what you wanted?” He grunted, fisting your hair and pulling up your face to see your tears. “How many men have you fucked in this house, you easy whore?”
“None!” You choked out, and even though he knew it was true, he still was getting aroused from the whole ordeal. He felt his pants stiffen around him, and noticed how your panties began sticking to the skin of your wet, needy petals. His hand ran through the red skin, sighing deeply as he allowed himself to emerge in his deepest desires. After all, people had seen him drink all night.
In a swift movement, he pulled down the white satin underwear, exposing your impeccable, virgin cunt. It drooled as Steve admired it. You gulped, unaware of his intentions.
“Stevie? please, I’m sorry, it will never happen again…” you whispered, just loud enough so he could hear. You felt uneasy as your legs quivered and you began to tremble.
“Of course it wont,” He said, awfully calm, fingers running down your slit. “Because imma gets you a good husband that knows how to keep his little harlot in line.”
His fingers were shoved inside you, tearing through your hymen and with that, any hope of finding a decent husband was gone. You weeped, pain and frustration coursing through your body wildly. His ministrations started in a halt, moving his fingers in and out quickly and painfully, stretching you open. He chuckled at your tears, knowing that most of them were not simply because of the ache in your cunt.
“Don't worry baby, I’m gonna take care of you.” He muttered, observing how his fingers scissored your bloody core. “Gonna treat you real nice baby, give you a big fat wedding ring, I know how you like expensive things.”
Your tearful eyes widened as you understood what he meant. You didn't want to believe it. “S-Stevie?” you croaked up, between violent intrusion. “Please, please stop!”
He stopped, removing his fingers from your cavity and smearing it on your thigh. He took a good look at your folds, puffy and pink in contrast with the specs of dark red painting it. His hands splayed your cheeks open, seeing the inviting canal that pulsated with every breath you took. Something inside him took over as you shivered, from both cold and fear.
In his knees, he neared you, pulling down his zipper as his hand delved to fist his bulging cock. Before anything, he turned you around so you laid flat on your back. You saw how the fabric of his shirt wrapped around his muscles, the wild glare in his eyes as you finally saw his imposing manhood, you sobbed as you realized this isn't your Stevie who would spoil you rotten at your whims. He was an angry supersoldier.
“Please, I’m so sorry Stevie, it won't ever happen again…” You begged one last time, but he only grasped your waist and pulled you closer, lining up his cock with your hole. “No!”
Your little scream did little to stop him, as he pushed his cock inside carefully, he wanted you to feel every ridge, every vein and every bump as he deflowered you. Your soft hands shot up to his immense shoulders, nails digging into his skin as you whined from the intrusion. It burned; he let you taste the fires of the hell he was condemning you to.
He softened when he saw your face, but he had to punish you. He began moving just before you were ready, making you gasp and moan as he delivered merciless hits to your cervix. You had never felt so full, Steve’s digit wrapping around your waist tightly as he observed how your tiny cunt enveloped his cock to perfection, a bulge forming just beneath your stomach from the curve of his manhood.
“My little nymph,” He groaned, pressing you against himself until his hip bones were engraved in the back of your thighs. He wrapped your flailing legs around his narrow waist as he ripped off his shirt one handed, his dark tie hanging in between the valley of your breasts. The stretch became pleasurable, but it was still overall humiliating.
He forced pleasure on you as his face came down to your chest, wrapping his mouth around your erect nipple as he took both of your wrists in one hand, the other gripping your ass hard. You whined as he handled you how he wished, words no longer falling out. Electricity began piling up in your lower belly, your cunt closing around him tighter and tighter as you unconsciously pulled him closer. Your hips reached up to him, needing more, just a bit more.
Steve understood this tell-tale sign, slipping his hand down the tight space between your bodies to find the engorged bead crowing your folds, right on top of where his dick pierced into you. With a couple of flicks of his wrist, which translated onto jolts of rapture rupturing through your body, spasming on him until you drenched him in your sweet cream. His pants were ruined now, but he couldn't care less.
You began feeling sore, but Steve was no longer pleasing you, he was searching for his own release. He forced your head down to see the union, how his cock disappeared into your channel, coming out red and white. Your body was just a stupid little outlet for all of his war frustrations, where he could channel all of those intrusive thoughs and desires. But he couldn't spoil you, not yet.
Just before he exploded, he pulled out from inside, leaving you clenching around nothing. He kneeled closer to you, hand wrapping around your head and pushing his cock down your tight little throat. He let his salty cum flood down your throat, so close you could smell your own essence on his pants. He didn't let go until you choked, pulling back to observe how the corners of your lips were stained with your own virgin blood.
Steve allowed you to lay back, now sobbing. Everything ached, and your mind wondered what was going to happen next. You were terrified of the monster in front of you. He calmly grabbed a small velvet box from his jacket, the one he was going to give Peggy. When you saw this, you began to cry harder, head shaking violently as your sore throat mumbled out “no’s”. He took the sizely diamond, grabbing your wrist hastily to secure the ring on your finger.
“You will marry a good man, want it or not.”
#Steve Rogers#steve rogers smut#steve rogers x reader#dark steve rogers#dark steve rogers x reader#dark!40s!steve rogers#dark 40s steve rogers#40s!steve rogers#40s steve rogers x reader#mcu#fanfiction#dark!fic
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Timeless lovin’ - pt. 3
Pairing: CATFA!40s!Steve Rogers x present!reader
18+ ONLY | MINORS DNI
WARNING - The following story contains: explicit smut, oral sex (F receiving), boob groping, dom!reader, Steve calls reader ma'am, sub!Steve, virgin!Steve, pet names, Steve has a praise kink, angst, fluff, developing feelings, spoilers, time skips, alternative reality, wingman!Bucky Barnes.
Pt. | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |
Summary: Steve left for Peggy in the past, and you were determined to travel back in time and get answers after he left your relationship of 4 years behind him just like that. You get a little ahead of yourself and travel past where your Steve left off, and you meet Steve Rogers, - the man before he hit the ice and was frozen for 70 years.
Y/N’s POV
For the night, I decided to give it a rest and leave my issues for tomorrow, seeing as there wasn’t much else I could do now that I had walked away from Steve. It was a good thing that I was exhausted anyway, and a good night sleep was very much needed.
Throughout the night, I was a bit tempted to leave back to my time before the morning rose, but it felt like it would be too wasteful. I acknowledged I was extremely privileged for receiving the opportunity of traveling through time, and so why leave when I could spend one more day to witness the life of the 40s myself?
The next day I woke up earlier than most and set course to the nearest town from the military base. Soldiers greeted me along the way of getting to the gate, as news had spread that a new female 'soldier' had joined amongst the Howling Commandos and had been of great service for the previous mission.
It felt good to be acknowledged with smiles and nods as a form of respect, but there was also the whistles which still put me off guard. I wasn't quite used to it yet but it wasn't like it surprised me. Due to people's acknowledgement of me, I didn’t have to show my ID when I left, which was convenient.
I took the bus downtown and walked out at the stop of the plaza. It wasn’t busy this early in the morning, but thankfully some shops were open for me to explore.
For me it was mind boggling to think I was the only one in the whole world with the knowledge of what would happen the next 70 + years. Everyone was walking around with the war as their only concern, - not robot and alien invasions. I envied that a little.
40s!Steve POV
I knocked on Bucky’s door and rushed inside once I heard his voice of approval. He was sitting on his desk, going over some of his files. Cutting through the chase, I asked him, “Buck, have you seen Y/N?” hoping he would possibly know something.
Bucky turned around, “You mean the girl you haven’t told me a thing about? I may have overheard someone mentioning her whereabouts. Why?”
I felt a sense of relief when Bucky said he had heard she was still around. Good, she hadn’t returned to her time then.
But who knows when she will.
“It’s urgent…I need to talk to her.”
“Steve, you’ve never been this secretive with me. Have I done something to break our trust or what?” Bucky asked with confrontation, his arms crossed as he expected an explanation.
I sighed, understanding why my best friend was feeling left out, when it was just too complicated for me to bring him into it. I had promised Y/N to not speak of our situation, and while it was tempting to share it with Bucky, I knew it wasn’t the right time for that yet. Not when there was too much going on from before.
“I…listen, I can’t go into details right now but let’s just say this woman is very important to me and I have to find her cause she left me yesterday before we could clear things up, and I’m risking on loosing her if I don’t leave right now…”
Bucky’s eyes widened with surprise, “Woah, hold on, what happened last night?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose as I was growing more impatient, and luckily Bucky retorted immediately with, “Fine, we can save it for later. I overheard some guy by the gate say he got to have small talk with her and she told him she’ll be exploring downtown today cause she’s curious about the area, - something like that. Don’t know what could be interesting in downtown Dover but -!”
“Thanks Buck, I’ll see you later!” I interrupted him from finishing his sentence as I left to head for the gate and take a ride on my motorcycle.
Second person POV
You had bought an ice cream sundae and had a taste of delicious apple pie at a cafe, - something that tasted so fresh and homemade, it couldn’t compare to your time’s desserts. Why didn’t they make them like this anymore?
Oh right, because in present time, all they do is put chemicals in every single ingredient because it gives a ‘better colour’ or ‘makes it last longer’ despite increasing risks of cancer. Lovely.
As you were carrying your bag of bought items and walking around for some more, you heard the rumble of a motorcycle catching up to you from behind. You turned around out of habit to make sure you weren’t in the way, but when you saw who it was, you turned almost panicked.
You had at least wanted to be mentally prepared to be approached by Steve or approach him again, - not like this where you were halting with shopping bags in your hand as Steve parked his motorbike by the sidewalk to come over to you.
Out of grudge and stubbornness, you decided to keep walking, even when Steve was calling after you. Once he inevitably caught up, he had you confronted.
"Y/N, please stop running away from me." Steve called you out, and you eventually went full stop.
You wrapped your arms around yourself, feeling conflicted about the whole situation but you didn't want to be a coward anymore. You were going to tell him what was the issue.
"I’m not running away…- Steve, this was all a big mistake. I should have returned a long time ago before we..before all of this happened...” You gestured at the space between the two of you. “We’ve been around each other long enough. There's nothing else for me to do here."
"No, come on Y/N....don't say that." Steve pled, sadness spreading on his features. He reached out with the extra motorcycle helmet to you, “Come back to the base with me, please. I’d like to take this conversation there instead of here in the open. The last thing I want is a HYDRA spy listening in on us.”
You huffed but agreed, and took the helmet from his hands before sitting behind Steve on the motorcycle. He put your items into the trunk, and had you wrap your arms around him as he drove back, being welcomed with an open gate at the base.
Once you got off, he led you to a secluded area, behind the wall of a bunker, where no other person would have a reason to be at the moment.
You met his eyes when you turned to look at each other, expecting him to talk first, - and that he did.
“Y/N, I…I don’t want you to leave. Not like this anyway. Yesterday was…well, I quite frankly enjoyed our time spending together, and I didn’t see why…you had to leave so abruptly after we…you know…” Steve trailed off as his cheeks became red, “I-I thought we had a good time. Didn’t you?”
“You’re with Peggy.” You started off with your reasoning. “It isn’t…- it wasn’t right for me to do that. I’m sorry I did that. I really don’t want to be the other woman anymore..” You said the last part above a whisper, biting the inside of your cheek as you tried your best not to cry.
“…You’re not the other woman.” Steve said sternly. “Me and Peggy…we aren’t official. Never were. She’s always given me mixed signals, and while we’ve shared a few romantic moments, it hasn’t been remotely the same as the ones I’ve shared with you. I’ve never…we haven’t done anything like I have with you.” Steve put it in his own way, trying hard to speak without crudeness.
You scoffed, “Okay, so you haven’t had sex. So? That doesn’t mean anything. At the end of the day, you left me for her. How can you be so sure this will be any different?”
Steve’s body turned tense, and he slammed his fisted hand onto the iron wall of the bunker, causing it to bulge. That had really caught you off guard. “I didn’t leave you! He did. Everything you’ve told me about my future self, - I don’t recognize myself in him at all. He obviously went through certain things that changed him. That made him miss what he once called home and made him forget of what he had right in front of him! You can’t keep on pushing me away just because of his mistake.”
You couldn't look him in the eye as emotions were once again bottling up and you were scared it would spill out. Steve’s face softened, regretting he had been harsh with his tone, but he felt like it was necessary this time. He took your cheeks into the palm of his hands carefully.
“Y/N, please look at me…” Steve plead. “I used to think I loved Peggy too, but with you, I’ve learned it was purely platonic. I only have fondness for her because she was the first woman apart from my mother to care about me despite being the puny kid from Brooklyn. I was practically all alone before the serum, with everyone else being way ahead of me. Including Bucky, no matter how supportive he was of me. I don’t expect you to understand...” he said, his eyes trailing down to the ground.
You gathered the courage to look him in the eye again as you spoke, “…Yes, your experiences are yours only…but you were the first man to take me seriously and care about me too. I used to think I would stay single for the rest of my life because no man would look my way, but then you did. I guess that’s one of many reasons I haven’t been able to let go. I’m upset he made me believe I had a shot in ever lasting happiness.”
Steve stared at you then, not believing what he was hearing when he was taking in your appearance. “You do deserve ever lasting happiness as any other good woman...I don’t know what kind of light is blinding the men of your time, but your beauty is beyond graceful.”
You chuckled lightly, “....That’s...sweet of you to say, -”
“I’m serious.” His voice sharpened. “I want to get to know you. It has only been a few days and I’m feeling things I’ve never felt before. A feeling I don’t want to let go of, and if you feel the same, you will not go back.”
You sighed with stubbornness, not willing to easily let yourself go defeat. “I…-”
“Captain, I’m so sorry to disrupt, but Miss Carter has just returned from London and would like to meet you.” A soldier said out of breath, as if he had wandered around for some time to find Steve, and Steve cursed under his breath for the bad timing.
“I’ll be with her in a minute, thank you.” Steve politely responded, and the soldier left. He looked at you again and held your shoulders. “Please listen to me. Don’t leave for the future while I go talk to her, okay? I’ll tell her about us.”
You sighed once more, “Steve, I can’t stay here, -” You were disrupted from speaking when his lips connected with yours for a kiss. It was unexpected, but you easily melted into it as his soft lips made it impossible to resist. He was gentle as he held your body close to his, showing how much he didn’t want to let you go.
Once he actually did, he whispered, “Please,…stay.” Steve pleaded once again, his cheeks turning pink at the bold move he had just pulled, but he desperately wanted to prove to you his worthiness.
You held your gaze to his and accepted your defeat, “Okay, fine…It’s a bad idea but fine.”
“Thank you. You won’t regret it. And I’m sorry for…not asking for permission to kiss you. I just,…you know…I really want you to stay.”
You laughed while shaking your head. “Fine. I’ll be waiting for you then, Captain.”
Steve went on his way after that, letting out a huff as a proud smile formed on his lips.
His heart rate had increased and it wasn’t just because he had kissed you moments before, but because he left you wanting to get back to you as soon as possible. You had laughed at his awkwardness, - not mockingly but out of being charmed, and he felt confident on being himself around a woman for once.
He couldn’t say he’s been able to be himself like this with any other woman without receiving a weirded out frown, - including Peggy.
Speaking of Peggy, - Steve spotted her by the mechanics, and before Steve could even think out what he should say, her eyes had caught him and she waved at him with a smile. She had her suitcase in her grip and a folder under her other arm, which told Steve she had quite literally just arrived to the base.
When they got close enough to each other, Peggy greeted him, and Steve returned it, “Hi Peggy, welcome back.”
“Steve, how nice it is to see you again. It’s been a moment but I’m sure they won’t be needing me in London for a while, - not until we go through the next big mission anyway.” Peggy informed contently while placing her suitcase and folder on a nearby table.
“That’s good. Things aren’t the same when you aren’t around.” Steve said.
Peggy snorted at that. “I’m sure it isn’t. I heard the last mission went swiftly though. You’re getting the hang of it and it has only been, - I suppose a year? It’s impressive really.”
Steve smiled as he made short eye contact with her, “Thank you, and yeah, I take pride in my progress. But of course there’s always room for improvement...”
“You’re right about that.” Peggy said, and pulled a frown when she looked to the side at her folder, taken aback at how simply Steve was responding. She was used to his rambles whenever she initiated a conversation, but now he was being awfully reserved.
When she looked up again from her documents, she continued, “Something’s on your mind. I can tell. Is there something you want to tell me? Something that has happened?”
Steve's eyes didn't know where to stay a-put as he grew nervous, and it didn't help with how he knew Peggy could tell he was.
Peggy sighed, realizing she would have to take initiative to get whatever picked Steve's brain to come out verbally to her. “Come, let’s sit down, Steve.” Peggy proposed, and Steve accepted.
They sat down at whatever place was available since there were no chairs outside by the mechanics. Steve cleared his throat, not sure where to begin, but he found what he could start with before he spoke.
“Peggy…you know that you’re very important to me, and that I would never purposefully push you away, or hurt your feelings, right?” Steve asked, as he fiddled with his fingers.
Peggy slowly nodded as she looked at the man who could only maintain his eyes on the ground. “There’s a ‘but’ to this, isn’t there?”
Steve swallowed a lump down his throat as he hesitantly looked up at her, - his 'first love'.
“I may have fallen in love with someone else.”
Peggy blinked, “Oh..is that so?” She asked, surprised to say the least.
“Yeah…I guess I just wanted to let you know because I think it’s only fair. I know we were never official and all, but we didn’t exactly keep it friendly all the time so I…-…I won’t blame you if you stop talking to me or ask me to leave you alone. I know this is out of nowhere, - these feelings came to me unexpectedly too, but I’ve never felt anything like it…so that’s why I…- I want to hold onto these feelings with this woman. I wouldn’t help it if I otherwise ignore it…” Steve spoke his end.
Peggy inhaled through her nose as she stood up, quietly walking over to Steve. “Hey, look, - If this woman is special to you, I am not going to come in the way of your happiness, Steve. You will always find a friend in me if that’s how you want to maintain it.”
Steve’s face lit up as he looked up at Peggy, who had a matching calmness to her face as her voice. “Really? So you’re not upset?”
Peggy laughed as she stroked Steve’s cheek. “My skin is thicker than you think. I can assure you I will manage just fine. I’m not going to lie to you and say it doesn’t hurt me a little bit but…moping around doesn’t do any good. Winning this war will be my top priority to the end of it, and I’ll follow you as a fighter despite where your heart’s at.”
Steve’s lips formed into a smile of relief to Peggy’s response. “Thank you, Peggy...it's relieving to know I haven't lost you as a friend."
He stood up and the pair shared a friendly hug at last, one of which Steve felt going into peace with the fact that he had made this decision to follow you instead, who his heart was currently beating so hard for. Steve couldn’t help but wonder if maybe this closure would have helped future Steve to move past Peggy as he didn’t feel any regrets or as though he was missing out on something, - not when Peggy had said she still sees him as a friend in her life and that it didn’t have to be anything else.
It felt right.
So how come future Steve hadn’t felt the same?
When he left Peggy to go see you again, his mind was wandering as he tried to reason with, -…well, himself. With circumstances being so different, where he in the 40s was now aware that at one point he will be going to the future and possibly meet you and become lovers, - the idea didn’t frighten him anymore.
It led him to believe perhaps future Steve hadn’t ever been at peace with it all as it wasn’t like he was warned about it. No, he most definitely couldn’t have been.
The kind of closure he got from Peggy moments before is something he never would have gotten if you weren’t here.
There had to be something about that, Steve thought.
You waited for Steve by the bonfire that had been vacated by the soldiers as they were deployed on doing their assigned tasks till afternoon.
You stared into nothing while you were thinking of so many things, but before you could get too deep into these thoughts, a familiar voice came from behind you.
“Hey, there. Y/N, right?”
You turned around and weren’t surprised by who had greeted you.
Bucky.
Ever since you met him for the first time, you grew incredibly annoyed each time you saw his face on a news article or literally anywhere else.
You were familiar with him first after he became listed as a wanted target by S.H.I.E.L.D., but the two of you only met face to face after Steve left as you were desperate for answers. You reached out to the person who was closest to him, but he didn’t know anything of you as you and Steve had only become a couple within the years of which half of the population was gone. Amongst those was of course Bucky.
So when you finally met and you explained everything, you were so disappointed with his answer. Offended would probably be a better word to describe it.
“Look, I apologize on Steve’s behalf that he left you without at least saying goodbye, but you need to see it from his perspective. Steve had it all taken away from him of living the good life after fighting Second World War. And then he was pushed into all this mess of becoming an Avenger, saving me and fighting wars with aliens. I was involved in a lot of that so I know just how draining it was for him. Steve has always put everyone else before himself, and now that he had the chance to live the life he wanted, he had to take it. I think it’s best for you to let it rest and respect his choice. -
He deserves to be happy.”
All of your nerves were hit by the end of his ‘wise words’, yet you managed to silently leave the place in order not to loose control and choke the man. Not that you had a chance against the super soldier, but you were too angry not to entertain the thought. You tried to excuse him for seeming a bit out of it himself, but you still would have preferred a shrug for a response rather than that.
What a way to excuse him for leaving his girlfriend of 4 years with no indication of doing so instead of being, - you know, - a man and say it as it is.
Fuck my happiness I guess, you thought.
“Hello, James.” You greeted back with less enthusiasm.
“You can also call me -“
“- Bucky. I know.”
He frowned but dismissed your hinted attitude. “I have a feeling Steve didn’t tell you that.”
You narrowed an eye. “Oh?” Had Steve told him about who I really am?
“Yeah, Steve usually introduces me as James until I get a chance to introduce myself in my own charming way.” Bucky explained smugly as he sat beside you at the bonfire. "But I guess with everyone calling me that around here makes it harder for me to do that."
“Right…” You replied.
“So…It’s come to my attention you and Steve are close. Is that true?“ Bucky asked curiously.
You shrugged, “I suppose you could say that.”
“You know, Steve is a great guy. He’s got all the qualities you could want, - he's this big macho guy yet he's sensitive, as you can probably tell just by looking at him. He can be a little shy sometimes but I can assure you it’s only cause he finds you gorgeous. A gorgeous dame makes any man nervous after all. If you're looking for something serious, you can most definitely count on him, - unlike the most soldiers around here....” He said, snickering in the midst of his last sentence.
You had to chuckle. It was obvious to you what he was doing, being Steve’s best friend and all. You didn’t need him to tell you he had all these qualities when Steve was good at showing those himself, but you welcomed it as you found it entertaining.
Suddenly another someone made an appearance, that person being none other than Steve.
“Excuse me, I don’t mean to disturb you two but I’ll have to borrow him for a bit.” Steve spoke while wrapping an arm around Bucky’s shoulder to lead him away. Once they got away from you far enough to be out of earshot, Steve glared at Bucky with concern.
“What are you doing?”
Bucky chuckled, “Nothing bud, I only put good words on ya. Figured I would give the lady some reassurance from someone who knows you the best. Maybe that will give the both of you a push and you’ll be sliding into second base in no time.” Bucky said, smirking at Steve who was left to blush with embarrassment.
“You don’t need to do that…I have it under control.” Steve mumbled. “I’m not a puny kid anymore. I can take hold of things myself now, including my love life.”
Bucky chuckled, “Hey, I’m sure you can but having a wingman is always useful, don’t you think? You lack experience despite how buffed up you have become. You’re still a virgin, aren’t you? Unless…?”
Steve gulped nervously, knowing full well lying out of the topic wouldn’t save him as Bucky could always tell when he wasn’t telling the truth. “I’m not about to answer that.”
Bucky laughed, “I know damn well Peggy and you haven’t gone beyond making out. I’m pretty sure I heard from someone that she’s one to wait until marriage. So come on, tell me. You’re killing me here.” Bucky begged, almost whining for an answer at this point.
Steve sighed as he tried to be as discreet as possible with his words without saying too much. “I haven’t -…you know…gone through intercourse, but I might have done something else.”
Bucky looked back at the woman again. “With her? You two did something last night, didn’t you?” Steve nodded hesitantly. “Damn, Steve I’m so proud of you! You’ve passed third base! That must mean the two of you are serious serious. Can’t believe you’ve never mentioned her before.”
Steve pushed Bucky’s arm, “Keep it down, will you? You’re practically shouting.”
“Hey, I’m just proud of you. You’re finally taking big steps.” Bucky pointed out. “With Peggy it was taking forever for the two of you to even kiss each other’s cheeks, - which speaking of which, are you over her? Have you told her?”
“I did tell her actually, only a few minutes ago…she was very mature about it and honestly, I admire that a lot of her.” Steve said, smiling to himself as the reminder that they were still on good terms was nice to him.
“But that might have been the problem.” Bucky added, “I noticed there was no real spark whenever you were together. Too much admiring and ‘looking up to’. You two were always…too polite with each other. I kind of knew by looking at the two of you that it wasn't going to go anywhere beyond friendship.”
“Really?” Steve asked, surprised to be hearing that. It was sending him in a spiral of questions and theories. Because he was aware that somewhere, there would be exactly that, - something beyond friendship. Him and Peggy being together with commitment. So why would Bucky say that? Had Bucky from a different timeline where Peggy and him did end up together share the same opinion?
Steve's head started to hurt the more he overthought it. Gosh, was it exhausting to be aware of these things, Steve thought.
Steve returned back to you after sending Bucky to the rest of the team, hoping this would be last interruption between the two of you.
“I’m sorry about that, Bucky is a bit…extra sometimes.” Steve excused.
You smirked, “It’s fine, he only said good things about you.”
“So he claimed…” Steve chuckled nervously. “I told her.” He apprised.
“Okay…so you’re done with her? Just like that?”
“We are still good friends, - but in the way you're thinking, yes..." Steve confirmed, his eyes shimmering almost nervously. "Are you now convinced you want to give us a try?”
You looked down, staring at the fire which was dying at this point. “Maybe,…I’m not sure where we should go with this. I don’t exactly belong here.”
“Is there...anyone you’ll be missing if you stayed? Family, friends?” Steve asked carefully.
You narrowed an eyebrow, "Are you implying I should stay here, Steve? In the 40s?"
"Would it be so bad?" Steve asked, expressing worry from perhaps suggesting the far fetched. "I know your time is way more advanced and impressive, but...- I'll make sure you have everything you need. I'll help in any way for you to adjust...and if it still doesn't work for you then..."
"- Then I'll go back, and try to move on. And so will you." You completed his sentence, though it wasn't the same words Steve would've used.
He gulped but nodded understandingly. "Yes. Exactly that."
You half-smiled sympathetically, hinting your sadness. "I don't mean to be harsh, but I don't want to have our feelings hurt more than necessary. We still have time to figure out and decide what we do, but you understand why we need to draw a line, right? If it doesn't work out, we call it quits."
Steve nodded again, “I understand…but that doesn’t mean I’ll promise I won’t allow myself to fall for you. Besides…I believe I’m already falling as we speak. There’s usually no return from a fall.” He said, almost poetically but it didn’t sound like he had put it together on purpose. He was just being his charming self.
“If you keep talking like that, I might stumble over the edge too.” You said with a wink. Steve laughed at that, and returned a cheeky grin.
From there, you decided to walk back to center base. There was a long silence on the way, where you simply observed the environment. When you got close to your assigned rooms though, Steve broke the appreciated silence.
“Uh, Y/N?”
“Yeah?” You asked, turning to look at him with curiosity.
“I had a thought and....- before we call it a night, I was wondering if...I could return the favor?" You stared at him, confused at what he was trying to insinuate. "I want to do what you did to me yesterday…but to you..” Steve whispered his clarification in your ear. “I-If I may..”
“You mean…you want to go down on me?” You asked as you bit your lip. You had figured as much that the concept of oral sex didn’t have its own descriptions in the 40s, which explained Steve’s lack of dirty talk.
Or maybe he was just like this.
Regardless, you loved it.
”Yes….I want to return the favor to the prettiest woman in the world.”
“Now you’re reaching it.” You giggled, humored.
“Am not.” He said with a slight pout.
You bit your lip, “Well, if you’d like…we could take this further in my bedroom this time….would you like that?” You asked innocently, but Steve knew it was anything but.
“Very…” he responded, sounding out of breath but he was simply overwhelmed.
At his reply, you hurried to your room with Steve behind you, making sure you were in the clear before you quickly entered the door and closed it behind you, locking it. You didn't leave Steve waiting as you climbed on him, Steve taking it as cue to hold you up as you started doing what he least expected, - have his neck and earlobe attacked with sucks and kisses. He whines when you suck for longer periods, but turns his head further away to give you full access. He backs over to your bed, his hands holding firmer around your ass as he lies down, leaving you on top of him to do whatever you please.
You unbutton his uniform jacket, leaving him in his white shirt. His nipples poke through the thin fabric, making it irresistible for you not to pinch them a little as you continue marking his neck with hickeys. His mouth slips out a cry, and you hush him, reminding him he has to be more quiet.
“Please, kiss me…” Steve pleaded, and you stopped what you were doing at his simple, yet heart fluttering request.
“Why should I do that, Steve?” You asked teasingly, pulling back to look at him again.
“Because I want to feel that feeling again,” he breathed out. “-- That feeling that tells me how right this is..- how right we are.”
Your heart skipped the hardest beat at his words. It was as if you were falling in love all over again, though this time there was so, so much more passion. Stronger than the first time.
And It scared you, but at the same time it pulled you closer to him. It made you think that perhaps this Steve could pull you even closer than your Steve.
No. Not your Steve anymore.
The man in front of you was becoming more ‘your Steve’ than Steve from your present could ever be, and it had only been days.
You pulled him by his collar and smashed your lips onto his, making out heavily with him. He held your waist with both of his hands, needing to hold onto something as he tried not to squirm too much. Whenever you pulled away for air, you saw for yourself how empty headed you had turned him. He was panting breathlessly, his face bright red from all of the sensations you were giving him. You smiled, pecking his lips lastly before you started to undress, making Steve's eyes go wide as he was brought back to reality.
Seductively and slowly you removed your jacket, revealing your white silky shirt. Once that was off, you removed your bra too, revealing your bare breasts. Steve was in awe, his eyes becoming relaxed for once as he stared at them.
No porn magazine could ever compare to the real deal... went a thought through Steve's mind.
Carefully you took his hands from your hips and placed them on your breasts, making his breath hitch as he felt the softness of it.
"Feel them, Steve...you're allowed to." You assured him. He swallowed before firmly groping them in his palms, squeezing them out of fascination.
He took a deep breath, trying to loosen up, "I...oh god, I can't believe this is happening.."
You made a concerned face from what he had just said, and you had to ask, "Do you want to take a break, Steve? Cause if this is too much -!"
"N-No!" Steve interrupted you hastily, "No...I just...I'm mesmerized, that's all...you’re so beautiful…you look like a goddess…”, he whispered as he took in your body in front of him.
You grinned, and watched as his thumbs curiously rubbed against your hardening nipples. You hadn't had anyone touch you like this for a long time, so you couldn't help but let out a soft moan as you felt your arousal between your legs grow. Steve groaned in response, feeling his own arousal rise at the sound that had just slipped out from your lips.
You removed yourself off of him all of a sudden, making him freeze from confusion.
"I have to take off my skirt and panties, otherwise I'll soak right through them..." You explained as you had caught his reaction, and that made him sink his shoulders with relief. Just a little bit.
Before Steve could even process it, you were fully undressed in front of him with everything on display as he got a small glimpse of your pussy with your legs closed. You smirked, not only because of his shuddering response but also from seeing his raging boner making a tent through his trousers.
When you spread your legs revealing your cunt, Steve let out a sharp exhale as he mumbled something in the lines of, ‘Oh heavens..’ He had never seen female genitalia before, - not face to face anyway. With a nod of approval from you, he bowed down and got closer to it, the arousing smell hitting him like a wave. He licked his lips, wanting nothing more but to have a taste and a feel of it.
His hopes were answered as you spoke up, “Go on, baby…make me feel good…”
“Yes, ma’am…” he responded, following the same pattern you had done on his cock which was to touch you first.
He touched your cunt lightly at first, having his fingertips gracefully stroke over the sensitive flesh. His sharp ears heard your breathing hitching when he touched particular spots, - the spots being your hole and at the top where there was what looked like a tiny pearl to Steve.
Your hand reached down to touch at the spot he had first touched, and you explained, “this is my clit…it’s the most sensitive part of my pussy, and if you keep rubbing it, I’ll get more wet..”
Steve hummed with fascination, and he mimicked the motion. When he rubbed your clit in a circular motion, he heard mewls slipping out of your mouth, making him turn flushed at the lewd noises.
"Your flower is so pretty, Y/N.." Steve commented huskily. Before you could say anything, Steve used his other hand to pay attention to your hole. He curiously spread your pussy lips apart before he carefully inserted his index finger in, wriggling his way to get it in there, - though your pussy juice was more than helpful as lube.
He began to pump his finger in a slow pace while still working on your clit, causing you to occasionally jolt. Bucky had shared plenty of advice on how to pleasure a woman, and to Steve's delight it seemed like those instructions worked like a dream based on your reactions.
He still had to ask, “I’m not hurting you, am I?…” worried your twitching was of pain, but the way you were moaning said otherwise.
“No, you’re doing so good…ngh, you're a natural, Steve...keep on shoving that thick finger of yours inside of me…” you instructed him, and he did so with quicker thrusts.
The quicker he thrusted, the more wetter you became. Steve licked his lips instinctively, and without asking, he pulled out his finger causing you to whine at its absence.
He was too eager to put his mouth on you, first flattening his tongue so he could flick it all over your folds and clit while his finger did the work below. You mewled loudly and slapped a hand onto your mouth, not wanting to let out more noises for others outside to hear.
“Y-You taste so good…I think…mmh I might get drunk on your juices alone…so addictive..” he spoke through his breaks before he dove in for more. The taste was so sweet to his tastebuds, it was driving him insane. He was leisurely humping against the mattress now, grinding his clothed dick along the sheets as he got off on pleasuring you. His tongue explored everywhere, - from the source of your wetness to around your folds and then at your sensitive nub.
“Ohh, you’re doing such a good job, baby…” you praised through high pitched moans. “…keep using your tongue…want you to tongue-fuck me..push your tongue inside of me, sweet boy…” you began to repeat your plea with desperation.
Your vulgar descriptions of activities and the pet names was only adding to Steve's maxed out lust. You were so fierce and exploring compared to him, given that you come from a society where that is more socially acceptable.
And Steve loved it. He felt confident with your praises and with your guidance. He wasn’t as scared as he thought he would be when experimenting with sexual activities such as this. He felt comfortable.
His fingers parted your folds carefully before his tongue dived into your quivering heat. You wither as Steve's tongue laves at your cunt, pushing the warm, wet muscle of his tongue into your tight core.
“Aaah! Such a good boy…oh fuck, Steve!” You fisted his hair, pushing his head closer as you began to grind against his face, and Steve happily accepted it. He was close himself, uncontrollably rolling his hips against the mattress as he pleasured you.
You whimper when Steve's finger finds your g-spot, and by your physical reaction he continues to thrust his finger at the same angle, seeing you fall apart in front of him.
"Holy shit, I'm cumming, Steve!!" You howled, quickly shoving your pillow over your face as you came, your orgasm hitting you like a wave. Steve drank you up as he hummed against your core, letting out a long-drawn moan of his own before he came in his pants. He panted against you, his hips coming to a halt as he looked up, his hair almost in the way of his eyes due to how messy you had made it.
“D-Did I do good, ma’am?” He asked, dazed, but desperate to know the answer.
You let out a breathless laugh before raising your head, “You did more than good,” you praised him as you cupped his cheeks and brought him forward for a heated kiss. He was in awe, and with his slacked jaw you slipped your tongue into his mouth, going in for another but shorter make out session. “You were perfect.” You specified further, making him squirm at the praise.
He had a praise kink alright, you thought.
As he rose up, you noticed the huge wet patch on his trouser with its sticky texture that had come on the sheets.
“Aw, did you cum?" You cooed the question. "What a mess you made…”
“Well, can you blame me?…” Steve spoke shyly, lowering his gaze out of embarrassment. “How could I not get aroused when you’re in front of me, naked, - especially after having a taste of your flower. It was beyond intoxicating..”
You chuckled, bringing Steve in to rest his head on your stomach with his arms wrapping around you as there was no pillow for him to use. You couldn’t help but snort after some silence, causing Steve to look up with curiosity as to what you found so funny.
“Why do you call pussy ‘flower’, Steve? I’ve never heard that one before.” You asked him, sharing the thought that you found amusing.
Steve looked away, turning sheepish again but he was more than willing to explain as there was a reason behind it. “Um…you see, my mother used to call female genitalia that to not ruin my innocence. I was 9 when I asked about what makes girls and boys different, and she told me girls have flowers that bloom and boys have tools that…turn more functional I guess? She never went down the details because she knew I would learn eventually. But since then, I’ve always called it that, - but it’s not like I talk about female genitalia often. Bucky mocks me all the time and corrects me by calling it a 'cunt’…but I’ve never liked that word. It sounds too crass for me…it just doesn’t sound nice. Female genitalia deserves to be called something more respectable I think,...- something pretty.” He said.
You hummed contently, “Mm, I like that a lot. Don’t stop calling my pussy a flower.” You grinned, slipping out a chuckle but it was out of adoration, not mockery. He turned to look at you, surprised with your response but glad you found it endearing.
“You know, I could never talk about this to any other woman. Somehow, you make me feel comfortable talking about anything..it just feels so natural to blurt things out to you without a second thought.” Steve shared, tightening his grip around you, and you smiled, putting your hand on his hair to play with it.
With a pleased expression, you responded with “I feel the same.”
You laid quiet for a while, until you felt Steve's weight leave you as he rose up, “I suppose I should leave to my room then…before it gets late and people start swarming in the hallway. Least I’d want is to be caught fooling around when I’m in service.” Steve reasoned, but he was making that face, as though the idea of having to leave was upsetting him a little.
“Or…” you trailed with another option in mind. “- you could just stay here with me. We can sleep together...unless you have other work to do?”
Steve’s eyes widened with surprise of your proposal, “…Um, yes, - I mean no! I don’t have more work for tonight…and uh, only if you don’t mind,..yes, I’d love to sleep with you…in your bed. - With you..”
You laughed, pulling him back in and having him beside you this time as you pulled the covers over the two of you.
You cupped his cheek, kissing his forehead which made him have to hold back a wide grin while you still chuckled.
“You’re such a big dork, Steve.”
The sun barely lit up through the closed blinds, but the commotion going around outside was loud enough to wake you up. Your eyes flickered open, and you saw Steve, already awake with his upper body risen against the headboard.
"Morning, doll..." Steve greeted you, then turned back to his sketch book he had in front of him. You greeted him back through a yawn.
“Wow, what a pretty drawing…” you murmured with your morning voice, holding an arm around Steve as you saw him adding shade.
It was a sketched portrait of you in your sleep. You could assume he had been up a while with how far he was with the drawing process.
He smiled, “The beauty comes from the motive beside me, doll..”
“Ha! You didn’t include all my flaws in the piece, that’s why.” You joked a little with your insecurities.
“What flaws?” He asked, turning to you confused, and you laughed, thinking he was trying to be smug. “No seriously, tell me what I’m missing cause I’m pretty sure I added every single detail…”
You shrugged as you pulled some hair strands away from your face. “I don’t look that pretty when I’m sleeping. My hair is usually messier and I’ve been told I sometimes drool in my sleep, which..- yep, I’m spotting a wet patch on your shirt...” you sighed. “Sorry about that…”
“It’s okay, I think it’s kind of cute actually…” Steve spoke softly. “And your mouth was shut when I started drawing, but adding a little drool could bring more life to the drawing.”
“Don’t add it, it’s fine.” You said, slapping his hand away playfully from having him do any changes.
He put his sketch book down and turned his body to you while rubbing his eye. “Gosh, I can’t believe you had me staying in your bed. I’m surprised we managed to sleep with the little space we have.”
“We were close enough to make it comfortable.” You said with a smirk.
He hummed as he started to think. “I feel like…I’ve known you my whole life, yet I don’t know a lot about you apart from things involving future me.” He said, guilt featuring in his face.
He raised his upper body up again as a sudden realization dawned upon him. “Where are my manners, I haven’t even asked you out for dinner, a-and we’ve been so intimate already…we’ve touched and….’tasted' each other’s genitals without going on a first date. - essentially I’m an awful man.”
You pulled him to lay back again and had his face in the palm of your hands, making him look at you as you spoke up, “Hey, don’t say that. It’s not a big deal for me. Well, it would still be nice to go out but you don’t have to worry about giving into your sexual cravings with me. I was the one to engage in oral sex with you first time around and what you did to me yesterday was so wonderful too…” you reassured tenderly. “You’re such a sweet man, Steve. You were such a gentleman, putting my pleasure first before you came yourself. I adore you. I really do...” your tone became more whispery with each sentence as you closed in to Steve’s lips, stroking his bicep with comfort.
He looked into your eyes through his lashes, then at your lips, hoping you will reward him with a kiss. With the way you were closing in, he knew he was getting what he wanted so much.
“I adore you too, doll…” he said, a second before you put his lips onto his.
It lasted moments until you decided it was enough to keep you non affectionate for the rest of the day as anything different wouldn’t be ideal at all. Steve was very busy that day and the week onward, but he kept his promise of taking you out when they set him free on one of the weekends. Through the lunches and dinners Steve took you out to, you had been able to connect better through temporarily leaving behind the elephant in the room. Since you were in public, you focused on getting to know each other without putting anything out there about your time travel business and future predictions. You were getting better settled into the environment in the process, and with Steve it was easy to feel like you belonged.
Steve asked you about your hobbies and interests, where and how you were raised, and about your accomplishments and failures. He seemed genuinely interested about learning everything there is to learn about you, his back hunched with his elbows on the table as he tuned in to listen about your life. It was nice how little he made it about himself, though you couldn't help but feel bad that he couldn't tell much about himself without you already knowing it. So instead, you asked him personal questions, - things the Steve from your timeline probably had forgotten to mention as it was far in the past.
After all, you had only recently learned Steve liked to draw and was a self thought artist, - a very talented one at that. Surely there was more to know about the Steve in front of you.
"Tell me...about your biggest fear, Steve. What makes you scared the most?" You asked. The question had put him on the spot, but you were curious.
After the blip and Steve had claimed you as his girlfriend, you had asked this question to him once. You had been restless like the rest of the world, wondering how you could move onward after something so catastrophic. You had a hard time finding your place in the new ordered world, and with that you developed new fears. Did a hero like Steve also have similar fears? Steve hadn't really answered that question when asked, only muttering something along the lines of 'I don't know...no possible fear of mine can top what has happened anyway.'
"That's an interesting question." Steve started, "Uh, I suppose...being useless is my biggest fear. Me being gifted with the super soldier serum in hopes of bringing justice to the world has made me think of what other importance I would have once justice is served. I want to be of good use, but what more use do I have once the world is all good?"
You gave it a thought for a moment, reaching out to hold his hand as you held your gaze, "Steve...you want the world to be a good place, right?"
Steve nodded without hesitation, returning the grip affectionately, "Of course I do. I know it might sound like I don't with what I just said but...well, it's hard putting words to how I feel without sounding a little selfish.."
You hummed, smiling reassuringly. "That's fine, I understand. Realistically speaking, the world will never be such anyway. With rising good also rises evil. There's no stopping it no matter how much we endorse good, so you don't have to worry about ending up as only a mere symbol of justice. There will always be work to do all over the world." You said. "And even if major threats such as HYDRA don't rise up again, you being there for people and giving them a reason to keep fighting will serve a purpose in itself. No one is ever useless if they contribute keeping peace around the world."
Steve smiled, looking down at your hands as he intertwined his fingertips in yours. "You're right. I think...I'm letting my insecurities get the better of me, but hearing something so reasonable helps a lot. Hearing that from you especially is...reassuring, for reasons I shall not mention in public." He said, suppressing a grin as he looked behind him cautiously.
You shook your head in midst of laughing. Steve was full of humor despite an ongoing war happening. He has made you laugh in numerous occasions and you haven't been together for that long. You really, really liked him, you had realized, - 'like' was perhaps an understatement.
The following weeks consisted of a routine of which you quickly got used to. Through most of the day you would observe what the Howling Commandos were up to, hanging around Steve's arm when you were allowed to invade space.
Thankfully you hadn't run into Peggy as she had her own separate schedule to follow. It wasn't like you were scared of bumping into her, but you couldn't handle an awkward conversation with that woman, where it would break down to the fact that you were the reasoning for Steve 'friend-zoning' her.
A wicked part of you took pride of reclaiming Steve's attention from Peggy, but you knew it wasn't Peggy who you should be mad at for what Steve from your timeline did. He chose to go back to her, and she was long dead when he made that decision. There was no way you were going to make enemies with her, - it would be too pitiful of you.
You stayed another two weeks in Delaware base, Steve and his soldiers following through their routines before you set course to Houston military base Texas, taking 3 days to get to by train. The beginning of December welcomed you in your arrival, and there you were to prepare for your transportation to Europe where the Howling Commandos would continue their mission of putting down the remaining HYDRA bases, as well as taking HYDRA down all together.
Dr Zola and Johann Schmidt - otherwise known as the Red Skull were still out there somewhere, and there was no doubt that the HYDRA ideology would be kept alive if they were left loose.
You knew that for a fact that it would anyway, knowing Dr Zola would make his way through S.H.I.E.L.D and contribute in compromising the agency.
When you were alone, you kept yourself occupied with Genesis, reading through upcoming events. While most events were insignificant, there was a particular event that had caught your eye, making your blood turn cold.
January 4th, 1945. - James Buchanan Barnes presumed death by accident mid-mission of capturing Dr Zola.
Oh no...
This was one of the biggest life changing events of Steve's life and it was approaching within weeks.
You tried not to let it haunt you too much. There was still time to consider how you were to interfere in that situation, - if you were to interfere at all. You didn't want to worry Steve either, especially when Christmas was around the corner.
The Christmas celebration was simple, yet so lively because of the soldiers. You could spot cheap, - clumsily put together Christmas decorations everywhere around the base, but it had its own charm. The real Christmas spirit came from the people you were surrounded with. You made small talk with the members of the Howling Commandos, - members such as Dum Dum who you knew was a well respected man among them. He was keen on having you share about your relationship with 'The Captain', but you only responded like a smartass, giving away little input about it. He was halfway drunk and didn't seem to mind though, - only finding you entertaining.
As you gained more attention from the members, Steve saved you by pulling you away, asking you, "May I dance with you, miss?"
You smirked, "Can you even dance, Captain?"
"If you take the lead, I might get the hang of it." Steve answered cockily, his confidence sparked from the 6 glasses of whiskey he drank. While alcohol barely affected his soberness, it sure made him feel lighter from his usual nervousness.
You found yourselves matching to the rhythm of the music being played by the musicians on stage, - classical Christmas carols being played on repeat. While it wasn't perfect dancing and unorthodox of you to take the lead as a woman, you enjoyed yourselves, occasionally laughing at how silly you were being. It wasn't like you were the only ones being silly, - half of the people dancing were drunk and making a fool of themselves too. It was all harmless fun.
No gifts were exchanged, but the free turkey serving made up for a pleasant Christmas celebration at a military base. After a couple of shots, your drunk self grew sleepy and Steve being the gentleman he is brought you back safely to your room.
Of course you didn't let him leave you too easily as your arms clung to him, begging him to stay. He couldn't resist you even if he tried.
The day after came and you were leaving for Europe. While dealing with your day after hangover, you made sure you had everything with you, most importantly Genesis and the suitcase which had the Stark industries logo removed by you for some time. Steve had you close to him, from when you first packed your stuff till boarding of the aircraft. He was also with you for the duration of the whole flight, sitting beside you and only turning to Bucky a few times who sat behind you for short conversations.
You didn't miss the exchanged smirks between the two men, making you internally laugh at how boyish they were being. It was the equivalent of two high school girls being excited for the other over a text from a crush. You decided to be bold and lean your head on Steve's shoulder, pretending you were going to take a nap. The sound of someone choking on their spit came from behind and you snorted, something that went unnoticed by Steve as he tried not to turn red again.
Snickers and chuckles from the soldiers sitting aisles back became background noise of the loud turboprop sound, and Steve couldn't do much other than bear it for the sake of you 'resting'.
The time of the long flight passed quicker than you anticipated, and you now found yourselves in northern Italy, in the very same country where the Howling Commandos made their first print.
People were held busy as, according to Steve, this area had been reclaimed from HYDRA only months ago, and now they were enforcing the place to make sure it stays that way.
Steve led you to a huge tent, which was personally set up to accommodate members of the Howling Commandos. That left less privacy than previously, but it wasn't like you and Steve had plans to go about your sexual conquests around this time. For the two of you, it only meant you had to go elsewhere to talk, to prevent slipping out confidential information.
That was why when everything was dropped by your designated bunker beds, Steve led you to a nearby abandoned church, which was only down a trail of the military base. While there was no power when you stepped inside, there were candles lighten up by the huge icons which gave the place a cozy vibe to it. Steve walked over and lit a candle himself, placing it carefully by the others before he sat beside you at the bench furthest back and pulled up his sketch book to draw. You watched as he started drawing a few lines while talking about all kinds of things, such as how it was for him to be here first time around when he was on U.S.O tour but then took the turn of rescuing soldiers and destroying the first HYDRA base; the foundation of him becoming the hero, - Captain America.
He had a smile plastered on his face as he talked passionately about how it was to finally be of use and rescue the soldiers, which also founded the Howling Commandos. How he was thankful for being able to save his best friend from whatever HYDRA was going to do with him.
Oh that's right...Bucky received HYDRA's mild super soldier serum at the HYDRA base in Anzano... Did Steve not know this now? You began to wonder. Seems like he didn't.
You moved the conversation forward before you considered speaking up about that, and a sudden question popped in your mind.
"Where has Peggy been all this time?"
"She's been around when we were in Delaware and Houston, though I believe she's in New York now, with Harold Stark. We had claimed HYDRA technology last time we were here and it was taken back to America for inspection." Steve shared the information he had on top of his head. "Why do you ask?"
You shrugged, "I don't know, I guess I'm surprised I haven't bumped into her once...she wasn't with us at the Christmas gathering."
"She was there." Steve clarified, which made you stiffen. "I suppose you didn't notice her. She only came by to wish us a merry Christmas before she went on her way."
"Does she know who I am? That it's me you're mingling with?"
"She hasn't asked after your name or any of that, but I can only guess she knows it's you since you're the only other woman here doing active service...she knows I'm not getting myself out there so she might put two and two together.." He closed his sketch book just then, putting it aside as he gave you full attention. "Why so curious about her all of a sudden?"
"No particular reason...I've been mentally preparing myself for the moment we inevitably meet each other, and I'm just surprised it has lasted so long without it ever coming." You explained.
Steve chuckled at that, pulling you into his embrace as he gave the top of your head a kiss. "She's not going to bite your head off if that's what you're worried about...if anything I imagine you two getting along well. You're both strong, highly intelligent women, it would only be natural."
You huffed and rolled your eyes, "I'm not scared of her. It's just weird you know...to be within reach of the woman I envied for two years because I learned she has something I don't have..."
"Hm.." Steve hummed quietly. His face turned sad when he realized what the meaning behind your statement was. "I'm not going to judge you if you feel...'uncertain' about yourself...but there's nothing Peggy has of her character and appearance that is superior to your own." Steve assured while stroking your back. "I have been thinking about it a lot about your situation and...I may have worked up a theory based on some logic, if I can call it that...I think the reason Steve from the future left was because the lack of belonging and familiarity, as well as him thinking too much about what he had potentially missed out on...he didn't have anyone tell him what he had to prepare himself for. That there would be a matter of time-traveling to the future. That is what makes our situation so different. I know some of the basics of what will happen and to be honest...I don't feel worried about it as much as I probably should be...knowing that I'll meet you and keep being of service, and getting to see the advanced world is...exciting? It's hard to put words on it really."
"I'll agree that is the most logical reason so far...but the more I'm with you, the less am I looking for an explanation. He left and...there's that...." Your face lit up when you processed what he had said last, and you tilted your head to meet his eyes. "Do you really mean that though? You'd be excited to meet me in the future?"
"Of course, doll..." Steve confirmed softly, "If I do appear in the future, we can at least continue our relationship from there. Maybe I'll cheat with my knowledge and meet you a few years earlier, so we can hit it off together with a head start. You can show me around, help me get settled, just like I've helped you settle here. It'll all be the same, just switched up circumstances. That sounds nice, doesn't it?"
""...I appreciate you sharing that with me, Steve. But I hope you realize, it most likely won't be me you're meeting."
Steve frowned, although he was a little zoned out and the sentence hadn't fully registered in his mind, so he asked, "What do you mean?"
You decided to stand up from the bench just then, dismissively shaking head, "It's...I'll explain it another time...It's getting late don't you think? We should rest." You suggested with a tight smile.
"I mean, we had a long flight, sure but...it's only 06:30 PM?"
You became silent, only letting out a sigh as if you had held your breath a little too much during the whole conversation. Steve grew worried, and so he stood up himself to come over to you and touched your shoulder.
"Doll, what's going on? You have been acting...kind of strange, - more like different the past week. As if something is bugging you." Steve spoke observingly. "Is everything alright?"
"Steve, I..." You started as you swallowed a lump down your throat. "I checked up with Genesis about upcoming events and...something bad is going to happen soon.."
N/A One more chapter and an epilogue to go! The stakes are getting higher. >>
Feedback and reblogs are very appreciated to help me complete this story! Thank you for reading! <3
#steve rogers x y/n#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x you#40s steve rogers x reader#captain america x y/n#captain america x you#captain america x reader#steve rogers#cevans characters#chris evans#chris evans x reader#chris evans character fanfiction#40s steve rogers
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we'll always have London ...
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