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vhstown · 8 months

Text

time out (part 2)

[boxer au] — 42!miles g morales x gn!reader

summary: Miles Morales makes boxing history. Your boyfriend isn't there to celebrate.

warnings: angst-ish, hurt/comfort, fluff, description of (boxing) injuries, briefly implied death, gtranslate spanish

word count: 5.3k

a/n: editing this was actual torture. kind of becomes a song fic? song is dreamer by bobby bland if you wanna listen before u read lmao entirely not necessary tho. part 2 of 2 but i might write this au again in the future !

← PART 1 / THE AU

Boxing — you tried to be as well versed in it as possible, learning as many terms and moves and whatever else you could pick up from Aaron when he was helping Miles train for all those weeks. What you weren’t sure of, though, was if a “time out”, or a break, had to be this awkward. What you also weren’t sure of was what on Earth your boyfriend was thinking doing here at midnight training (or splitting his knuckles open, though you didn’t quite know the difference anymore,) right after his tournament had finished.

Regardless, there was nothing you could do about it. Even if you wanted to, you couldn’t just leave and “give him space” as you might’ve done before. The weather didn’t look like it was going to clear up anytime soon, and you had no signal or money; it wasn't like Miles would call a car for himself anyway — stubborn.

Miles was sat on the floor against a set of shelves with various things that belonged to Aaron, and you were on an unbearably stiff bench press seat, legs close together so you wouldn’t fall off and your jacket hung around the weight. Cold, uncomfortable, dead silent — the perfect atmosphere for a productive conversation, of course.

Truthfully, you had no idea what to say. Yeah, you’d just talked big game to your boyfriend and scolded him like his mother probably would’ve if she knew what the hell he was up to, but you hadn’t planned anything after that. Miles wasn’t a talker — not by any means. Right now, he was sat on the floor with his legs crossed, stretching uncomfortably on his elbows with his hands in awkward positions to try and not strain them too much. He hadn’t said anything, so you hadn’t said anything either, and now you were stuck without any words and too many thoughts.

It was a lot of unmet glances and quiet shivers, and you tried your best to kill the urge to just... lean over and hug him. As much as you missed him and wanted to let out everything you’d been feeling for the past couple of weeks, now wasn’t the best time — Miles probably couldn’t even hug you with those gnarly injuries anyway.

Miles’ eyes were dull and tired, fixed on the ground or maybe somewhere you couldn’t see. As usual, you couldn’t gauge anything from his expression besides mild annoyance. It was like a constant guessing game. First, why your texts weren’t going through, secondly, where the hell he was, and now you had to figure out why on Earth he was so frustrated. Your luck had ran out with those first two guesses, and his silence certainly didn’t help — again, not a talker. Not even a looker; he wasn’t stealing glances of you anymore, like he was thinking about something. If only you knew what.

The most you could guess was that this was about not winning — but it couldn’t just be that simple. Miles was stupid sometimes, but he wasn’t delusional — he knew that he probably couldn’t beat every single person in that championship when he was just starting to go professional. This wasn’t some kiddish, lofty dream Miles had either — he was serious from the day Aaron got him those gloves, which were now crumpled up in the corner next to you. He wouldn’t throw a fit over nothing.

It wasn’t right to force it out of him though, and you could still sense the stubbornness lingering in the crease between his brows. You resisted the urge to smooth it out with your thumb, instead just killing it with every other thought you deemed “selfish”. Apparently, waiting was just as much of a competitive sport at boxing.

The door rattled as icy drafts bit at your ankles and fingertips. It sounded like the sky was going to collapse from how intense the storm was growing. Miles was just in a tank top, his hoodie abandoned on the bar behind you. You figured he could get it himself; any sort of help always seemed pitying to him anyway.

“I’m training with uncle Aaron tonight — stay home.”

“I can handle myself. How else you think I got this far?”

“You ain’t comin’ to Vegas with me.”

You found yourself reaching for the hoodie anyway. Miles didn’t notice, of course, but you could see the goose bumps on skin even from this far away.

“Hey,” you muttered, making him look up. “Are you gonna tell me what’s up, or sulk some more?”

His mouth opened, but only to let out a breath, before silence fell between you again.

“Fine, I don’t… get it, or whatever.” You continued, fingers trailing into the sleeves of the hoodie. “But I don’t get how I’m supposed to when you’re not talking to me.”

“There’s nothing to get.” It was like you had Vegas between you two again — like he wasn’t even here.

The fabric of the hoodie was warm, and a part of you didn’t feel like letting go of it — if only your boyfriend was in the hoodie too.

“I don’t get why you’d box without wraps, for one.”

“I’m just… frustrated,” he yielded, albeit unhelpfully. “‘S nothing serious, promise.”

Serious enough to have your fingers hanging on by a thread. You noticed his thumb nursing the blackened skin around his knuckles, and his expression seemed even more distant than it was before. It was always some impossible game, and you hadn’t lost, but were drained and out of words for now.

Maybe he’d figure it out for himself; you weren’t too convinced of that. Despite that, it was getting annoying to hear the constant howling of wind and rain outside. Walking over to the shelf, you dropped the hoodie in Miles’ lap. You doubted he had even looked at you, but you didn’t need him to. Right now, you needed something to fill this boring, cold and wordless room.

Looking through the shelves behind Miles, you noticed a picture: a much younger Aaron wearing boxing gloves, a medal around his neck and standing next to someone you assumed to be Miles' dad. You'd never looked at any of the pictures close up, but you noticed there were a lot of old pictures like that, before finding Aaron's collection of records.

Taking the first one out, you put it into the player and carefully set the needle, glancing at the name of the song. His taste in music wasn’t exactly popular, but you’d rather listen to “DREAMER” than “inconveniently timed Brooklyn storm” right now.

Letting out a sigh of your own, you slumped down next to him as he pulled the hoodie over his head, arms going back to being crossed.

"~Dreamer... dreamer... Like a fool, I thought that it could be..." Of course it was a sad song. Blues? The haunting melody made you feel blue. It made the cold feel more numbing than biting on your skin. It made you feel, in general — what, you couldn’t really place.

“…Are we okay?” you muttered without much thought. The urge to talk had come back, and you hadn’t decided if you regretted speaking yet.

"~Dream on... dream on... surely someone, will understand me..."

Miles let out a breath, and it felt like you were exchanging more sighs than words. “Yeah. I just… ‘S not you.”

No “promise”, though. Did that make it more or less honest?

"~What do I say, when I've, oh, said too much? I think by now, I'm wastin' time..."

“...I love you, y’know?” you continued, hating how out of place it sounded. It was as useless as that text you tried to send, but you were tired, and missed your boyfriend, and wished he would give you even a glance.

“~I'm going… oh Lord I'm gone…”

“Love you too,” he mumbled in reply. It wasn’t very reassuring, and it didn’t seem like it to him either, because he reached out to brush your hand against his. You took his hand first — gently, and his thumb pressed into your palm in a sort of silent apology.

You hated how futile it was, and how much you craved it again. You hated you couldn’t be even a little mad at him, and how you were defending him to yourself. Maybe you were both in the wrong. No — you weren’t wrong, you were trying to be understanding.

You weren’t wrong for feeling this way, were you?

“~You are the absence, of my mind…”

You hated how much you missed that boy from all those months ago — even though he was right in front of you. It didn’t feel like Miles Morales was yours anymore, he was theirs — whoever “they” were. His competitors, his managers, the media… It was like there was no trace of the Miles you knew before. Maybe it’s because you couldn’t deny it anymore: that Miles had a dream, and you probably weren’t in it. You hated how you took it so personally.

And you hated how you reached out to hug him, despite all of that.

It was just you for a moment, and you were about to pull away before his arms wrapped loosely around the small of your back.

You hated how you hid your face over his shoulder, and how nice it felt. You hated how warm he was, and how the room was freezing.

You hated how familiar this was.

“~Lord, dreamer… dreamer…”

“Sorry, cariño. Didn’t mean to be an asshole.” Miles’ fingertips dragged uselessly over your back, and you shamelessly tightened your arms around him as he pressed his cheek into yours. You might’ve shed a tear, if it weren't for how heavy your eyes were already with the late hour. Neither of you could go home yet, though you weren’t sure if you wanted to right now.

“~Like a fool… I thought, well, that it could be…”

The long sigh you let out was followed by Miles’ own quiet one before he kissed you on the cheek. His breath warmed your frigid face and brushed at your heart, as he always did. You wished you could be upset, overreact, scream at his face, tell him how you felt all this time. It just always had to end with forgiveness, because now, you couldn’t even remember what you had felt.

And you hated it — not as much as you’d like.

Closing your eyes, you buried your head into his hoodie while the music, the storm and the sound of your own breathing blurred together in your mind. All you were left with were your own thoughts.

This boxing thing didn’t involve you — it never did. He didn’t want you there to see him, or even tell you he was home from Vegas, and now it felt like he was just putting up with you here. It felt like you and him were on opposite sides of the pavement, only walking together to share the same umbrella. He just didn’t want you to get soaked — or hurt.

“I told you not to come today… I’m walkin’ you home.”

He didn’t want you to expect too much.

“Nah, you don’t need to see me train. It’s borin’ as hell.”

He didn’t want you to give up on him.

“I’ll make it big — promise.”

He wanted his dream — did he still want you?

“Just be patient with me, cielo.”

Patient, huh? If only you could be like Rio. It felt like you were just as bad as Miles. Maybe you were — both just as bad as each other.

“Why didn’t you text me? …At all?” Muffled against his hoodie, you hoped your voice didn’t waver. It felt a little manipulative, even if it wasn’t in the slightest, but you couldn’t keep telling yourself things were all good. Miles had been avoiding you, whether that was intentional or not. You were just being open — trying to be open. You hope he’d try too.

The boy in question was silent, before he pulled away, hands lingering at your sides.

“I was…” Miles took in a breath, voice dying out for a moment. “Look, I…”

“~Down the wrong way, on a one way street…”

“I can’t be a boxer anymore.”

It felt like the rain had gone quiet. There was no need for an umbrella between you two anymore. It felt like you’d closed it yourself, walking to the opposite side of the pavement again, watching him and the dull, empty sky from afar.

You were the one that asked him — you wanted him to speak to you, and now you weren’t even sure what to say.

“~You'd think by now, I would have learned…”

“What do you mean…?”

“My contract got terminated.” His voice sounded forced, strangely robotic. Was that what you so wanted to get from him?

“Can’t you just… get signed by somebody else?”

“There is nobody else. I had a contract with Norman Osborn — he basically owns boxing.”

“~I saw a little, but I learned even less…”

Your heart dropped a little — you wouldn’t let it drop any more than that. It made sense why Miles was so excited back then if he got signed by someone like that. Now, that excitement meant nothing. All you could think of was that video, that interview…

“I jus’ hope you watchin’, cause I’m here. Miles Morales made it!”

So he’d just… given up? Miles had given up? Was that it? The end of it?

Boxer or not, you suddenly had the urge to punch him — maybe even punch yourself. It didn’t even matter who was right and who was wrong anymore, because you didn’t even know who was in front of you. It was almost uncanny to see Miles like this, so dejected; that’s what he’d been feeling all this time. As much as it seemed like he was mad at you, or was avoiding you, or lying to you, it was never really about you.

Miles was refusing to let go of his dream — of himself — until right now.

And you didn’t know what overcame you at that moment. Maybe it was Rio’s words, or the fact that Aaron wasn’t here, or the fact that you felt like you’d lost your boyfriend — if he wasn’t going to be stubborn about it anymore, you sure as hell were.

“So you’re telling me nobody else is gonna sign you? At all? You haven’t even looked?”

“You don’t get it, ‘s more complicated than—”

“Baby, look at me for a sec.” Your hand was on his shoulder with more confidence than common sense, eyes were square with his avoidant, dull, hopeless gaze. You haven’t ever seen Miles hopeless before. You couldn’t let him be if it was the last thing you did. “You, Miles Gonzalo Morales—”

“Aight, you don’t need the full name.”

“I do need it, because my whole ass boyfriend changed boxing history.” Frankly, you had no idea what you were saying; it felt like you were shooting in the dark, but you didn’t care if you sounded a little stupid, or over-the-top, because if that’s what it took to get your boyfriend to crack even a little… “His 'legendary left jab'—”

“Babe, where the hell did you get that from?” The look he was giving you was probably more of a “jab” than anything.

“…The news.” The corner of your mouth quirked up despite your best efforts, face pricking with heat as you remembered reading through that Bugle article like it was divine revelation. A little stupid, a little over-the-top, sure, but it was true.

Miles’ lips pressed together, and your face heated more trying to decipher his expression. You didn’t have to, because the snicker that escaped his throat was enough make all the rain and thunder and lighting, and even the song insignificant.

“~I only learn to regret…”

“Miles, I’m serious,” you muttered, rather unseriously, brows furrowing as you tried to smooth out the meekness on your face.

“Legendary?” There was a hint of his usual mirth in his tone, and you tried not to be bothered by it. Anything was better than seeing Miles like that: ridiculous, over-the-top, unserious, but not hopeless.

“Look, it was the Bugle, okay? Some millennial wrote that — like, some lady called Mary.”

“Why do you even remember that?” Anything that could come to mind, you’d tell him. No more silence. Just be yourself. Keep talking.

“I read it, like, a lot, okay? I was really proud of you and I just…”

The smirk fell fast from Miles’ face, and you held back any words you might’ve had. The rain eased back in as a constant patter against the windows — the silence had come back despite your efforts. Your heart started to sink a little again, but all you could offer was an awkward smile.

“You’re proud?” he asked, like you’d just lied to his face.

“Yeah…? I always am, but seeing you make it so far…” It was something you didn’t say enough, you realised. The words echoed in your mind as you found the confidence to look at him.

“…Miles Morales made it, right?”

Another tiny breath left Miles, his eyes closing for a moment as you waited for him to speak. You wanted to backtrack, maybe hope the rain would die down soon so you two could leave — you had sort of snuck out… That wasn’t the point, though. You weren’t sure what the point was right now, and you weren’t sure what he was thinking, as always — again.

His lips pressed to your forehead, and then your forehead was against his chest — somehow.

You still had no idea what he was thinking. Now you had no idea what he was feeling — or what you were feeling.

The room was freezing, but you were sure you were slowly setting on fire. Traces of the awkward smile you had were stuck on your face as your cheek pressed into the fabric of his hoodie, and suddenly every little thing you’d thought about saying to him had disappeared in its entirety.

“Dios (God), am I a dumbass…” he murmured to himself. With no clue what to do, you could only focus on the hesitance in the way he held you close, because of his injuries, you weren’t sure. His fingers were cold, like the air was. You didn’t hate the warmth this time.

The silence returned again, and instead of your heart sinking, it was fluttering wildly. You so wanted to take it in your hands and hold it still, but you couldn’t even hold Miles back.

He did this sort of thing often — used to do this often, when he was stressed for whatever reason. He wouldn’t say if he was, but you could always tell. Sometimes he’d ask, and right now, he didn’t, but it wasn’t like you ever refused; it was nice, safe, and away from the storm — close.

"~Surely someone, will understand me..."

He kissed the top of your head, like he was hoping you’d understand.

If only you could. If only you could understand why your boyfriend couldn’t see it — see how far he’d come, how much he’d achieved, how proud he should be of himself, how neither of you should be here right now.

If only Rio was here to tell him how proud she was. Or Aaron. Or his dad.

You never really knew his dad. You knew he’d be proud, at least. He'd probably be beaming seeing how far his son Miles had come, like he did in those pictures with Aaron.

You were proud too. Did that count for anything? Would that change anything? It wouldn’t get him another contract.

You wanted to squeeze his hand, but that was a stupid idea considering the state of it. A lot of your ideas felt stupid as of late. None of them would get him another contract.

It felt like a lot more than just the contract, though; maybe that's why it was so hard. If only he’d tell you.

But waiting wasn’t a game, or a competitive sport. It was nothing like boxing; there was no winner. Waiting was a choice — a promise, that you’d be there when he was ready.

“Just be patient with me, cielo.”

You wondered if he’d ever be ready.

"~Dream on, baby."

You wrapped your arms around him, finally. At the very least, you promised to hold him, if not before, then now. He tightened his grip too, just mariginally.

“I’m sorry, mi cielo.” he started, voice barely audible. “I swear, I didn’t know you actually…” Miles trailed off, resting his chin on the top of your head instead.

“Cared?” you suggested, wondering if he could hear you. “It’s a lot more than that.”

You felt his chest fall as he let out a sigh. “I know.”

“I want you to know.”

“I do, I just… I’m being real dumb and—” You squeezed your arms around him before he could finish his sentence; no more avoidance. What you were going to say after, you didn’t know.

“…What?” His voice was suddenly soft, controlled. It was like he could hear what was going on in your head.

“You ever…" You moved your head away from his chest slightly, so he could hear better. "You ever had a stage name in mind?”

It was the only thing you could think to ask, though you didn’t ask it with much thought at all. Still, things weren't going to go anywhere if you kept dodging the subject.

Miles was silent for more than just a moment — it was enough to guess he did have one. “...Why?”

“Cause… when you get back in the ring, people gotta know you right?” It wasn’t just blind optimism — you decided that you did really believe in him. They weren’t going to see the end of someone like him, not by a long shot — or a legendary left jab. Your boyfriend was one hell of a boxer; it wouldn't just stop here — no way.

“I mean, '17-year-old from NYC' isn’t exactly catchy,” you continued, despite his silence.

Just one loss before so many wins. At his age, a win, against a “long-time champion” no less, was worth a million times more than that Norman guy’s contract, no matter how much of a big-shot he was.

“You think I’m gettin’ signed?” They’d be stupid not to.

“I know you’re getting signed.” Rio's words came back to you, and despite your hesitance, you found yourself saying: “If not, I’ll sign you and go to Vegas myself.”

Patient — like his mom, but also with that fighting spirit. You realised you had to be on his level too — match his energy, his enthusiasm. He’d spent long enough being on his own.

“...Fine, fine,” he shrugged. The edge in his tone seemed to fade as he thought for a moment. “If you’re signin’ me, you’re signin’… The Prowler.”

Miles loved boxing? Screw it, you loved boxing too. You loved boxing more than him, in fact — because it was a part of him. And even when he didn’t love his dream so much, you’d be there to love it for him. He loved all of you, and you loved all of him. That was still true now, even if he was going through something not so lovely.

And soon, you’d have something else to love too. Something new.

“The Prowler,” you repeated, a smile of your own creeping up on your face. “…You sure?” The groan Miles let out was enough to curb your need to annoy him… with love.

“Cariño…" he mumbled. "You ask just to make fun of me?” Miles shook his head, and you just squeezed him around the waist again.

“No, no way. I wanna welcome you to the team, Prowler.” A few firm pats on his back got him to laugh again, and though it was barely, that moment felt worth all those weeks.

“You can’t be serious.”

“I’m a hundred percent serious. You and your 'legendary left jab' and all.”

“You…” The hint of a smile was in his voice, and his good hand came to pull you closer, pressing the two of you flush against each other.

“Me…?” Your voice was muffled as you rested against the hollow of his neck, feeling the vibrations of his voice as he spoke.

“Can’t believe you’re still here.” It sounded more like he was talking to himself, speaking under his breath. The way it came out, it seemed like something he'd wanted to say for a while.

“Why would I leave?” Why would you ever leave?

“No clue.”

His good hand found your face, and you turned your head a bit so it wouldn't be so awkward to reach it.

“Don't know why I ever thought that.”

You felt his thumb run across your cheek, before pulling away and tilting your face up to meet his eyes.

“Damn, you're beautiful,” he murmured, dipping his head down to bump your nose with his, stoic expression and all. You were just about able to keep your composure.

“You trying to make it up to me with flattery?” It wasn’t like he had much to make up for — in your eyes, at least. The tease made his eyes narrow, but the ghost of a smile was on his lips.

“I can make it up to you a hell of a lot better than that.”

“Morales,” you warned, thought it didn't come out much like a warning. Especially not with how quietly you said it, your face so close to his.

“What?” It was his turn to be annoying. “Lo imaginé…” (I thought so…) You weren't sure you minded it.

It was nice to be joking, and flirting, and close again. There was no need to protest right now — no reason to pretend to be mad. His arm shifted to search for your hand, and you unconsciously laced your fingers together as your faces drew closer. You were already squeezing his hand before—

“Aye…!” Miles hissed, slipping his hand away as you both remembered the nasty, loud bruise that was spreading across his hand. His left hand, you realised, was the one he’d injured — it wasn’t exactly legendary now.

“Sorry…” you muttered, lips pressing together tightly as you took in the sight again. “But that was your fault."

Miles frowned at you almost incredulously as he held his own hand. “Nuh-uh.”

“Time out, Morales.” You couldn’t help it. Or help the smile on your face.

“You’re kidding.”

“Nope.” You kissed his cheek to really rub it in. No more words from him, it looked like.

After a moment more of silence, and watching Miles nurse his own hand, you spoke up again. “…Are you gonna go back? To boxing?” Miles looked back at you, before nodding.

“Yeah. Eventually, I guess...” He let out a sigh, but it seemed like one of fatigue rather than frustration. You blinked away your own tiredness that was creeping back. "As the Prowler.”

“Got a lot of… prowling to do, then.” He pursed his lips at you in contempt, and you gave him a meek look in return. As much as you made fun of the name, it was pretty cool. “When are you thinking?”

“I’ll wait a little. ‘S too soon." Miles put his less-brutalised hand on your knee, looking at you a bit more earnestly. "Gotta make it up to you, first.”

“Obvio.” (Obviously) You tried hiding your smirk this time, but he caught it anyway.

“Driving me crazy for no reason,” he mumbled to himself, shaking his head. The few times you did speak Spanish, it usually wasn't to be sweet.

“A good crazy?” you tried, hoping he'd humour you a little. Maybe he could find it sweet?

“Ni hablar.” (No way.)

Sweet enough to kiss you, anyway. With his better hand, he held the side of your face by his fingertips, pressing a short, chaste kiss to your lips. The feeling was warmer than anything, and you were left with a smile tugging at the corners of your mouth as he pulled away.

“Te amo (I love you),” he whispered with his own shred of a smile. You caught a glint in his eye before his expression faded into that same serious look. “I'll fix up, I promise.”

“No need to promise." With your thumb, you finally smoothed the crease between his brows — an old, shared habit. It made his expression soften a little. "Cause you will, and you’ll make it even further next time.”

“Right,” he agreed, hand still lingering by your jaw. “I will. Gimme a time out if I don’t.” A laugh escaped your mouth at that.

"Sure." You met him with your own chaste kiss, your heart swelling as you felt him smile a little against your lips. “I love you too, by the way.”

The record had stopped playing, ages ago, you noticed, and there was another stretch of silence. Total silence, actually — it had stopped raining entirely.

“We should probably head back,” Miles stated as he looked out the window with you, before getting up with a bit of a groan. The two of you needed rest, especially him.

“Yeah,” you murmured, reaching for your jacket. “I mean, I sort of… snuck out.”

His silence made you turn back, only to be met with an unamused look. You tried not to laugh again. “So you’re sayin’ we’re both dead.”

“Pretty much.” He rolled his eyes at your sheepish smile, but you caught the corner of his mouth lift up as he turned to the door. It wasn't like the two of you hadn’t snuck out before — this was just like all those other times, just more… unplanned.

The night time air was strangely cool and breathable as you left the warehouse. Though the concrete was slippery, and you and Miles had to hold onto each other to not fall, Brooklyn was glimmering almost ethereally by the moonlight, the sky clear with any lingering clouds now gone. You hooked your arm in Miles' arm, his hands loosely tucked into the pocket of his hoodie. He’d have some explaining to do to his mom about his hands, and you’d have to creep back into your apartment as quietly as possible — but right now, in the silence hum of the city, you felt that things would be okay. Maybe they weren’t excellent, or ideal right now, but okay was a good start. The Prowler was a thing of the future, albeit near future. Right now, it was just you and Miles Morales, going home together past your curfews.

Ping! Ping Ping Ping Ping Ping Ping—

Way past your curfews.

At the same time, the two of you pulled your phones out, only to be bombarded with notifications of missed calls and texts. You were a short distance away from the warehouse now, and your phones had only just gotten signal. It was 1:02am, and you had walls of texts asking you where the hell you were and to "get your ass home right now" on your lock screen. Miles gritted his teeth, and you didn't want to think about what Rio had to say.

As the pinging died down, your eyes met, the both of you thinking the exact same thing:

“We’re so dead.”

You shot a quick message back and mental prayer, Miles doing the same before hastily linking arms with you again. He returned your sheepish look with his own as the two of you kept walking, trying not to slip in the puddles. It had already been a long night, and it was about to get way longer, but at least you could have each other’s company.

"~All my life, been a dreamer..."

"~Dream on... dream on..."

After all, you could guess that a lot more than just a “time out” was waiting for you at home.

"~Maybe somewhere... maybe somewhere..."

🕸️🔭👾

↑ the song! bobby bland 🔛🔝

felt a bit empty without a message hi this is vee it is midnight and i have to go to school in less than 8 hours ! thriving !!!! also if you're interested i have a post about just the au itself here <3

taglist (ppl who asked anyway 😭): @iissza

reblogs appreciated (like so much i literally melt and die) catch the rest of my atsv stuff here!

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lunarw0rks · 3 months

Note

professor!price 🫦…you gotta write something about this now that you’ve mentioned it omg I’m a sucker for prof!price gosh

anyway I love your work/writings !! they’re freaking amazing💆🏻‍♀️

a/n: this was supposed to be a full fic, but i physically could not finish it for months. but rather than deleting all this work entirely, i decided i would release what i had! just to give you guys something. i hope these mere crumbs are sufficient as a kind of soft launch back into this blog...

─── ꒦꒷ MAIN MASTERLIST ꒷꒦ PRICE MASTERLIST ꒦꒷

PROFESSOR!PRICE

synopsis: you catch the eye of your supportive, but firm literature professor. warning(s): SFW, BUT 18+ MDNI, professor/student dynamics, hint of dom!price, fem!reader, no use of y/n, not edited

Just your luck, being late on the first day of the semester.

It truly wasn't your fault. Your schedule was in shambles, and you had the administration to thank for that. Not to mention, your literature course was in an entirely different building; one you had yet to step foot in earlier in the year.

It was like starting kindergarten; eyes wide with nerves, knees trembling, searching for the correct classroom with a crumbled schedule in your hands.

Only today, those hands were grown and holding your phone screen, examining the digital schedule you'd been sent after the ordeal at the scheduling office. Still, that same troubled look in your eyes, no matter how far you'd advanced into adulthood.

But it wasn't a colorful large print displaying the three-digit class number like it had been when you were small.

It was a bland monospace font displaying your next stop;

┃ Classic Literature - Prof. John Price, Rm 1026

You were late by a few minutes, not an entirely catastrophic start to your first day, was it?

Internally, you were crossing your fingers that this professor wouldn’t be a complete hardass. That would be the taunting cherry on top of an already stressful mid-morning.

From behind the door, you could hear the gentle drone of what you assumed to be the professor's voice.

Gruff and sophisticated — that much you could tell before walking in.

"The syllabus is available—" his introductory speech interrupted when you opened the door slowly, causing an echo through the classroom when the hinges ground. His eyes met yours, staying on you as you shuffled along, for too long.

He broke himself out quickly, continuing on, "—available online or on the table beside the door. Paper or digital, it's your decision. Study it, learn it, and follow it."

Your new professor is intensely intimidating, despite not being outwardly threatening. Perhaps it was his aplomb when he spoke to the class, or maybe it was the gaze bordering on a glare he gave you.

Following, you made even more of an effort to blend in with the rest of the class. To sink lower into your seat, keep any and all attention on him, as if to undo the unfortunate first impression.

It was hard to focus, and not because of his teaching.

The following week, you made your best attempts to keep up. He wasn't assigning too much work or especially rude to the students. His gentle intimidation made it troublesome, despite not speaking one word to you yet.

There you were again.

Watching intently as he spoke in that soothing voice. White button down, or sometimes gray, exposing just a bit of his chest. Wispy dirty blonde hairs, just barely poking through, more so when he'd lean down to change his presentation slides.

Shit. He'd announced a test you had spaced completely, when you were too occupied with your other courses.

He reaches into a folder and holds it up. "This assessment is on paper. I want you all to do your very best; think back to the material we read in Chapter twenty-three."

23? What material? You were completely fucked, with not even a half-chance at earning a grade passing on this. You hear the rustling of paper, and then see all your seatmates passing the packets. With a widened expression, you shuffle the stack to the next person over, finally taking a gander at the paper below you.

Minutes passed, spent either chewing on your pencil or doing your best at bullshitting answer; analyzing a literature piece you hadn’t read a word of. He knew it, too. A sharp gaze whenever you’d happen to look up, jolting you back into fake focus.

This was bad, and you were running out of ways to define the feeling.

You weren’t even sure fucked would suffice.

Twenty-three percent — etched on the top of the exam. Surely, the only reason there was any sum at all was because you spelled your name correctly and scribbled the date.

It might as well have been a zero.

Beside the humiliating score, SEE ME was bolded in red ink, as if he’d murdered a sharpie to emphasize his disappointment. Fortunately, you snagged the graded paper exams from a box outside the room, saving you the heat of looking into his eyes.

Now, the real nail-bitter was going in to see him after hours. By no means was he an intimidator, nor callous, but he had power. The authority to tarnish your transcript forever. Whether he would or wouldn’t isn’t important — that scenario is still startling.

At least you had yourself to thank for not being careless in class; those students that huff or mutter curses when addressed directly. He always noticed their snide attitudes, whether they knew it or not.

But you weren’t them; you were attentive and reserved during his lectures, no matter how under stimulating their contents were. Though, the professor had a way of making anything feel profound or educative.

That’s what you told yourself when you knocked on the door. After hours, nothing but a dim light through the frosted glass next to the door. “Come in.” His gruff voice muffled back.

The cold metal fo the doorknob did little to soothe your nerves. Neither did the sight of him — and only him. No other students here to sort out a grade? Not a slacker begging for extra credit? A fellow teacher making boring small talk?

None of the above.

It's only you shuffling inside awkwardly and him at his desk. A small reading lamp illuminated only his workspace and not much more, leaving the rest of the lecture hall pitch black. He's writing fast with a fancy pen, one that's surely worth a pretty penny. When you've failed to make the first move, he glances up with a scowl.

Price curls his finger into a 'come here' motion, earning a gulp from you. You'd swear that bricks were tied to your ankles, and it was any wonder you didn't stumble the closer you got.

As if failing an exam wasn't humiliating enough; now you were alone with the stern professor behind the mark.

You trekked closer to the large desk, peering at the copy of your failed exam he brought forward. As if you needed another reminder. He brought out a felt tip pen as red as blood.

“Want you to be honest with me, save us the grief. Did you study for this exam?” Price asked, followed by an stone expression.

For a moment, you thought about lying. Muttering some pathetic yes and hoping for the best. Until you kept looking at him, how his stillness made you gulp and rethink.

“No, sir.” You sigh, suddenly having a parched throat.

For a moment, he went still — as firm as the glances he always through your way. When you were tempted to wave a hand in his face, he composed himself again, straightening and adjusting himself in his desk chair.

As if ignoring you, he resumed grading the assignments neatly stacked in front of him. Every glide of the crimson tip against the milky paper struck a nerve in you. You leaned on a hip in impatience, clearing your throat softly to regain his attention. After all — he was the one who called you here, wasn’t he? And now he’s treating you like you’ve faded out of existence.

You balled your fists, digging your nails into your palms to gather courage.

“Is there something I can do about this score? Or have you called me in here for no reason? Sir?” You’ll be the first to admit that the words came out brattier than intended.

But, to you, they were justified. And you most definitely didn’t want to spend the rest of the semester despising one of your professors.

His head raised slowly, placing the pen down at a slow speed. Leaning back with his legs spread, his hand dropped to his inner thigh. “Adding Sir won’t make this any easier on me you, darling.”

You got the attention you wanted. But not in the way you expected. At all.

As if breaking a record for speed, you were flush and shifting around awkwardly, unable to spit out a rebuttal. Who could? Especially when your opponent had the power to frame an expulsion, or flunk you purposefully. However, Professor Price wasn’t the malicious type — and that made this so much worse.

It was all genuine. Those glances, the stern tone, his want — no, need — to want better for you. Even if the methods were the definition of questionable.

“Don’t act meek around me. What is it you’re trying to say?” He inquired nonchalantly, blinking as he waited patiently for you to catch your breath. But you never did; you remained utterly stunned.

After what seemed like forever, but was really only a few seconds, John realized that this meet was going nowhere. Clearly, being direct was the only way to get through to someone as clueless as you.

His tone is firmer whilst assuming a lower volume — as if afraid someone would hear. But he wasn't. If there was the slightest chance of getting caught, he would've directed you to an extra credit sheet and sent you on your way.

Price curled his fingers. "C'mere."

⊹。°˖➴ SECOND NOTE: should i release more of my forgotten WIPs? | divider cred. - cafekitsune ༉‧₊˚.

#mw2 #call of duty #task force 141 #mw2 fanfic #task force 141 x reader #141 headcanons #captain john price #john price #john price headcanons #price headcanons #captain price headcanons #captain price x you #captain price x reader #captain price #price mw2 #price x reader #price cod

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fancyfade · 4 months

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random question but i'd love to hear your analysis of damian's speech patterns/cadence! ik it's changed over time a bit but i'd love to hear ur take on it

I kept saving this in my inbox trying to be like "i'll think of a good response sometime and dedicate time to it" but I could not ;_;

In general, when he just starts in the comic, Batman and Son, we see a lot more focus on him having like "spoiled kid" vibes (at least how people conceptualize that) in dialogue, with stuff that it's hard to imagine him saying later (like yelling 'why can't I have a laptop').

He also curses freely in Batman and Son, I can't remember level of cursing later.

IIRC he doesn't start calling people mostly by their last names until at least batman and robin 2009 (possibly 2011?) but he does speak notably different in batman and robin 2009. He takes himself seriously. We see later comics indicate he doesn't use slang a long (like when he says something sucks, dick is like "i'm proud you're finally using youthful colloquialisms").

Damian in general sounds pretty confident when he speaks, and does not readily admit fault. He likes trash-talking people as he's fighting. we see this multiple times in Robin: Son of Batman (in his fight with Talia in a flashback, in the preview comic, etc) and in Batman and Robin 2011.

Williamson kind of bland-ified his voice so much I don't count it as evolution of Damian's speech patterns but Williamson just failing as a writer.

like IDK for some reason this bit

Batman and Robin #2

just seemed so un-damian-like to me? like I get him being concerned about the animals, that's not OOC. But him pleading immediately is super weird. Williamson's probably like "oh the reader's too stupid to tell he cares about animals if he doesn't" but like.. in general, in pre-Williamson writing, Damian can obviously care about people or animals without immediately coming across as pleading or desperate

I will keep in mind how his speech is portrayed as I continue my Damian re-read! Hopefully then I'll have a more defined answer for you :P

#dc comics #anon #ask #damian wayne #robin #batman and robin 2023 #batman and robin 2011

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tozettastone · 24 days

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RE: "there's so little F/F fanfiction," and its supposed relationship to misogyny, unexamined "fandom truly hates women," statements, and also why "eating your veggies" ala dutyfic is all kind of... inadequate and poorly expressed, in my view (and in my experience, as an AFAB person).

"Fandom hates women," is a statement that's usually written as though the person writing it does not hate women themselves. I think feminists who can't acknowledge their own misogyny are probably living the unexamined life (sorry, Socrates).

These people are right that misogyny is a problem. But they are wrong about how, why, and whether or not the amount of F/F fanfiction or female character-centric works is a proxy for measuring it.

I think there must be room to accept that among the people who happen to be assigned female at birth, even the most liberated suffer from some amount of internalised misogyny — or even just the relentless examination of their own thoughts in trying to root out the misogyny they know is in there. It's an ugly thing people really try to pretend isn't real. Feminists are also misogynists. Society has raised us all ugly and correcting it is a lifestyle, not a one-and-done deep clean.

Sometimes we've thought about it so much that every line of text is haunted by the long shadow of that misogyny. I know I often start and don't finish, or finish and just don't post, my f/f fanfics. It's not just because it attracts more harassment (although it sure used to, at least; I don't know now), but also because I overthink what I'm putting into the world: Is her vulnerability in this moment an attitude of feminine weakness? Is her stoicism just me the writer falling into a bland stoic butch trope because it's easy? Am I replicating gendered things I hate in M/F fanfiction but don't notice in F/F? Is this just writing in character, or is it a sexist stereotype? Hey, what if writing "in character" IS a sexist stereotype? What does this female character, a representative of her entire constructed identity, say about women? Shall I write another scene where she cuts her soft hair and rejects pink girly things and takes her job ever so seriously as part of a power fantasy, in which the excision of femininity goes hand in hand with the attainment of that power?

Every line of text might be a new enfilade in the long identity war. It's Schrodinger's sexism. Who's reading? What will this imply? What will they infer?

I just feel like, personally, until you can exist in society as someone that other people view as a woman, in a way that isn't being perpetually dissected and examined (by yourself, by others, by the people who feel insecure and defensive and want to respond to this saying "uhmmm sweetie that's YOUR problem, I'm an enlightened woman who genders and fucks how I want actually, YOU'RE the only misogynist here, you just suck," as though that's not yet another permutation of exactly the high-pressure, high-critique behaviour I just described), there will simply be fewer people putting their writing about female characters (and by extension F/F) into the public eye, and fewer people who want to do that writing at all.

It's just so fucking exhausting. I think it must be nice, sometimes, writing deathly boring (to me) M/F romance that openly embraces gender stereotypes, where she's always taken by surprise, and he's always competent. Ha.

But then you attempt a M/M romance, and you have to think, "isn't writing masculinity as the totally unexamined default actually kind of an act of collusion, too?" It doesn't have to be. But it sure can be, when you feel like this. And then you throw your laptop out the window. (I'm writing this on my phone. How did you guess?)

You have to draw a line somewhere, horribly, between your existence in a politicised body, your representation of politicised bodies in your art, and your existence as an individual who wants to enjoy their fucking hobby.

Maybe that means you delete all your social media accounts and go herd goats on a mountainside. Or you write about aliens for five years and give them whatever genitals you feel like today. But, like, listen. It's going to be fine. Gender is made up. I know, I know, pretty much everyone else thinks it's a holy binary, just like good and evil, and you have to live in the same world with them, sending coded gender messages all day every day and unable to stop. I know. But it is made up anyway.

Key takeaways: People should write whatever they enjoy writing and kind of just worry less about it. Worrying isn't helping you make fun art. And the amount of fanfiction about female characters and F/F relationships is a poor proxy for whatever we think we mean when we say, "fandom hates women."

#tozette.txt #just venting lol #I do not write long unhinged posts like this very often anymore #but what's a blog for if not to have a whinge about fandom wank now and again #fandom wank

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fruitzbasket · 1 year

Text

twiyor eden headcanons pt 2 📚

• time passes. people realize loid is okay. for a guy from westalis, at least. he has the best grades in his class, he’s insanely skilled at tennis and other sports, he’s good at cooking, and… he’s handsome. very handsome. chaos ensues.

• most girls are cool about their attraction to loid. and then there’s people like camilla, who go an extra mile to drive yor away from him and vice-versa. they find it easier to target yor, so she gets the short end of the stick.

• one afternoon loid notices that she’s being strangely quiet. shying away from him, avoiding his eyes. he eventually convinces yor to tell him what’s going on and it turns out that someone (camilla) told her that she’s not pretty or smart enough for him. that she’s too bland. too weird. he almost earns a tronitus bolt for the public telling off he gives to yor’s group of “friends”.

• yor receives many love letters. loid always looks like he’s about to stab someone so even though he’s more popular than yor, he doesn’t get as many confessions as her.

• she’s seen loid around his mom. she hugs him often, ruffles his hair, fixes his uniform. westalians must be affectionate people—that’s why loid holds her hand while walking to class, right?

• franky learns quickly that flirting with yor, even jokingly, is a death sentence.

• the library is their favorite spot in eden. yor reads true crime/horror books and points out gruesome paragraphs with a sweet smile on her face. “…and then his spine was ripped out!” “wow. is that book even allowed here?”

• they often have study dates. not that yor would call them dates, mind you.

• in fact, loid thought they had been dating months before they actually started dating. they walked home together everyday, they went on (one-sided) dates with each other all the time, yor disliked it when he was around other girls, she frequented his house, she slept with her head on his shoulder sometimes, etc.

• the day they became imperial scholars is the day yor kisses his cheek for the first time as a thanks for helping her out with her studies. loid valued that kiss more than his new status as a student.

• you know that official art where eden!loid is wearing a bandaid on his nose and yor is looking kind of bashful? she’s to blame for that bandaid being there at all to begin with. it’s just that he was so—so close! she couldn’t not have panicked!

• confessing to yor is a whole ordeal. loid has to come up with several plans and they all end up in failure for one reason or another. when he finally managed ask yor out on a date and walked her back home with the full intention of confessing his feelings on her doorstep, yuri threw a rock at him from the window.

• yor has very organized notes. she adds a few hearts/flowers/stars next to titles when she’s bored so there’s stuff like ♡WAR CRIMES♡ on her notebook lol. yor also writes things like yor forger, yor briar-forger, yor and loid forger… she remembers those too late, when her notebook is already in the possession of the forger in question.

• yor is part of the volleyball club. loid hoped to join the art club since he’s fairly skilled at drawing, but he's busy with the part-time job sylvia dragged him into. also, the tennis club would riot if he were to give his time to any other club.

• loid confesses to yor during valentine’s day. he sees yor being confessed to by someone who’s getting too comfortable, saying things yor doesn’t understand, touching her arm—normally he would just watch. not this time. he's had enough.

• "you should’ve punched him." "i was about to! why are you so mad for, anyway? it's not like we're d—dating." "...i would like to." "what?" "i would like to date you, yor."

• she straight up runs away from him. it's a disaster. loid thinks he might have miscalculated everything yor has done up until now. to him, that was 100% a rejection. he treats it like one.

• yor avoids him like hell after that incident. they only really talk again a few weeks later, when yor kisses him in the infirmary. she sprained her ankle during volleyball practice and loid carried her all the way there without a word. always so good to her. there's no way loid would see her in a romantic light, not after she's showed all her bad sides in front of him. he'd want to date for someone prettier, someone smarter, someone he can protect.

• loid is expecting her to tell him to leave. he doesn’t expect her to look down and quietly tug on the sleeve of his uniform. "did you mean what you said the other day?" (of course he did.)

• yor’s parents were strongly against their relationship at first, citing yor’s naivety and loid’s westalian origin. loid and yor even had to meet secretly for some time. for that reason and that reason only, they waited until loid was done with medical school to get married.

• in this au, loid retains his canon day job. loid is a good match for a psychiatrist, especially one focused on treating war veterans. he’s unbiased, well-acquainted with the subject of war, has great observational skills, etc. i read somewhere that yor’s performance working in the city hall is average at best? enough to not make her boss mad? so i could see her doing something else that she’s more passionate about, maybe as a teacher for younger kids. she’s great with them. and i like that part where she disguised herself as a teacher to infiltrate eden. more yor in glasses, please.

#spy x family #spyxfamily #twiyor #loid x yor #loid forger #yor forger #yor briar

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fryuteih · 10 months

Text

I'm Into Older Guys!

Na Kamden x Reader

High School AU where reader is into older guys to the dismay of Kamden, who's in the same grade.

Note: The writing in this post probably sucks so read at your own discretion if you hate bad writing ✍️. (First work too & it's too many words long)

----

It was a well-known fact to those who spent time with you, that you took an interest to older males. Your friends, most especially, knew this.

Said friends would often find themselves stuck, listening to your banters about how this celebrity in his late 30's had the "most beautiful" jawline, how this senior from photography club was so "passionate" about his craft, how this upperclassmen looked at you with the "dreamiest" eyes a bit too long in the school cafeteria, and so on. Your banters were, to put it, "over excessive and delusional" in the words of your best friend named "Keita".

"Can you shut your delulu-ness for 1 second?" Keita exasperatingly whisper-screams infront of you.

Currently, Keita, Kamden, Jay and you were seated at the school cafeteria. The four of you often spent breaks together and had frequent hangouts or study sessions after school. So, it was no suprise that the lot of you were currently seated together during lunch.

"No! Look behind you! He literally is shooting me love-eyes!" You whisper-scream back, trying to make a point.

"I think he's shooting love-eyes at Karina" Jay pipes up from beside you, gesturing behind him with his eyes.

"Exactly! You're just a delusional idiot" Keita happily claps and gives Jay an affirming shoulder pat.

"Hey, I'm not taking sides, ok? I'm just saying what I think is happening."

"You guys are just haters, for real. Kamden, tell them he's shooting love-eyes at me!" You expectantly waited for Kamden who was beside Keita, to prove them wrong.

In response, Kamden sighs tiredly and rubs his forehead with his unoccupied hand. The boy was quiet up until this point as he was trying to eat in peace, and so, was tuning out to your group's banter. He was especially skilled in zoning out, but somehow, he couldn't whenever you were talking. You were assertive and loud when you wanted to and it was difficult to ignore, right now was a prime example.

"Well..?"

"Leave me out of this" He whispers solemnly

"Look you made him sad!" Keita points at Kamden with a mouth full of food

"One: Gross, Two: I didn't mean to!"

"Awwww, Kamden are you sad? C'mere" Jay tries to comfort his friend by attempting to hug him, arms outstretched towards the boy infront of him and upper body leaning forward. Leading your hand to forcefully stop him by the stomach in an attempt to avoid the tray of food infront of him splattering on his shirt. Kamden instinctively rejects Jay's efforts with his body and seemingly had lost his appetite, dropping his utensils down.

"Jay can you stop? You're making a scene." You try to mediate the situation as people started side-eyeing at Jay and his antics.

"This wouldn't have happened.." Keita takes a big bite of food "..if you weren't delusional over older guys way out of your league." He finishes with a mouth full of food

You grimace at the boy infront of you "One: You're actually disgusting, you need to stop that. Two: Are you trying to make a point?"

"Yeah, stop making everyone uncomfortable over your addiction on ancient men and start going for guys age-appropriate."

"Please, a mere one to three, sometimes even five year age-gap isn't that bad." You were going to continue your tangent, already opening your mouth to say the next words, but was soon interrupted.

"You should start eating, lunch is going to end soon and you've barely touched your food." Kamden says before you could continue talking

"I didn't know their salad was going to be this bland." You defend, still restraining Jay "Anyway, back to what I was"

"Here, you like potatoes right?" Kamden nudges his tray of food containing an already one-fourth eaten dish with some potatoes on it towards you "Next time, think about what you're going to eat thoughtfully."

"I-" You were going to reject the offer, guilty that the boy was giving you his food out of pity, but was once again interrupted

"I lost my appetite anyways, it's better to not waste it." Kamden shuts you down

You accept the offer, taking Kamden's tray of food with your hand that wasn't restraining the persistent Jay, "If you change your mind and still want to eat, I can buy you food later after class."

"Whatever, eat already." Kamden says while Keita shoots him a look, raising one eyebrow

You sweetly smile at the boy that offered you food and start eating, then you refocus your attention to Keita, "Anyway, age doesn't define whether or not their out of my league."

"Nahhh, anyone older than you is too mature for your kid attitude." Keita argues, yet again with a mouth full of food "If you don't want to be a kid, maybe stop your obsession over older guys for a bit, yeah?"

"I'm not gonna change my standards just because you're a hater, besides, why should the world care when I'm not hurting anyone."

Kamden scoffs, seemingly at your statement which makes Keita howl in laughter causing him to choke on his food. You laugh, trying to muffle your laughter with your hand as Kamden stares at you, head resting on his right hand. On the other hand, this makes Jay stop his incessant attempts to hug Kamden and transfer his attention to patting Keita's back profusely.

You were about to go off at Keita about how karma had bit him, patting his back lightly as you were shaking from laughing too hard, but his continuous choking was starting to become concerning. Too concerning that people were full-blown staring at your table now. Too much concerning that the Kamden who usually ignored your group's antics had started hoisting Keita up to get him to the clinic, putting one of the boy's arms around his shoulders. Most concerning when Keita had started spitting out his food. You started to wrap Keita's other arm around your shoulders and helped Kamden lead Keita to the clinic. Jay trailed behind the three of you, telling reassuring statements to Keita while the on-goers you lot passed by stared at the predicament and Keita, well, continued letting out the most gruesome choking sounds.

Once the group reached the clinic, the nurse quickly ushered Keita to sit on a bed. The nurse then made Keita lean forward and gave him the loudest back blows you've ever heard. The boy almost had his eyes gauging out but it wasn't for naught as the food he was choking on, went out from his esophagus.

"Rest here for a while boy." Keita was one step ahead of the nurse, moving his body to lay sideways on the bed. The nurse then looked at Kamden, Jay and you, "The bell rung a few minutes ago, all of you go now, I'll give you an excuse slip for being late to class. The youth should really learn first-aid" The nurse whispers the last part

You all comply with the nurse, taking your slips and bidding farewell to the silent Keita. Walking down the hall together, you finally reach the intersection where you would part ways with Kamden and Jay who had class in the other hallway.

"Jay go ahead without me, I need to buy water" Kamden says pointing to the hallway you were going

"Isn't there a vending machine with water there? Why waste the time, you might get in trouble for being too late" You question pointing to the hallway where Jay and Kamden's class was.

"I don't like the water there, it tastes fishy." Kamden scrunched his face while waving at Jay to go.

"Alright, you're dead meat to Ms. Lee tho. Enjoy walking together while I walk in loneliness" Jay bids farewell, shooting Kamden a look, eyes squinting.

"You should bring your tumbler next time to save on money." You direct to Kamden as the two of you walked down the hallway.

"Hey [name]"

"Hi Kamden"

"Don't feel guilty about what happened, Keita was bound to choke on his food these days"

You chuckle, "Yeah, I can't help it tho. He did keep talking because I kept talking to him."

He chuckles back, "That's how you always are, huh?.. Besides, this'll probably stop him from talking with his mouth full."

The both of you stop at the vending machine. Kamden raises his eyebrow at you.

"It wont hurt waiting for you a while, yeah?" You say

Kamden smiles, buying two bottles of water. He offers you the other one, "Here you didn't drink water after eating, right?"

"Oh right, how much is a bottle of water again?"

"No need to pay me, it's a hassle if you give me money now."

"You already gave me your lunch, I don't want to use you that much." You say guiltily

"Come on, we're going to be even later now. Just take it, you said that you would treat me after school, yeah?"

You reluctantly take the bottle of water from Kamden, "I'll remind you everyday from now on to bring your water bottle"

Kamden silently nods and waves goodbye at you, walking fastly to his class. You don't think much of what he did and paced to your classroom, thinking heavily on what Keita had said to you.

-------

Once classes were dismissed for the day, you rushed to the clinic, thinking that Keita would still be there. Just like what you had thought, he was there, sleeping soundly.

You sat down on the chair beside the bed where Keita laid. A few seconds passed and you watched as Keita's breathing pattern started to slow down. You panic and guiltily reminisce about what Keita had said to you earlier at lunch that had led to him choking. Was it really that bad that you liked older guys? Keita did just want what was best for you, because who would he pester if you weren't fine? Jay would only get too apologetic whenever someone was bothering him for whatever reason and Kamden would only avoid someone annoying him. You felt the same way about Keita, he was your good friend that you could always rely on to not hold grudges for something idiotic. Keita wouldn't necessarily forgive but he would get back at you, it was a mutual friendship.

Your thoughts then wandered to times you and Keita spent together.

------

"Keita! Look, look!!" You excitedly brought your phone up to your best friend's face

"Okay, okay! Be glad you're my only friend right now" Keita mumbles "What? A 50-year old man's profiting off a concert?"

"One: He's 37 years old. Two: let's go together! He's going here."

Keita thinks for a second, "Admit it, dogs are better"

"Cats are superior"

Keita sighs at your stuborness and then thinks for another second, "You're lucky I like his music, otherwise I wouldn't agree."

"So you're going?" You excitedly ask

"Yeah, it'd be cool to actually see an artist in action. Besides, I want to see how he's attracting so many people."

"One: Omg omg you're actually agreeing. Two: He has a jawline that can slice a person in two."

"That's weird"

You decide not to argue with Keita as he had already agreed to go with you and might take his word on it back if you provoked him. You were going to show Keita in real-life anyways how handsome this male artist was and how influential his career must be with all the fans at the concert as evidence. An experienced artist like him knew the ways of life and used that to uplift his career, it was admirable to you and so was his jawline.

When the concert was finished, to put it, Keita officially was a fan with you as the both of you blasted his music on the way home.

---------

You stood at the front door of your best friend's house. After pestering Keita to let you visit, he finally let down. Was there an ulterior motive for wanting to visit? Yes. What was it? Well, you rung the doorbell to Keita's residence and only a few seconds later, the door opened to reveal Matthew who was smiling so very brightly. Matthew was Keita's older brother by 3 years and that meant 3 years older than you.

"Oh hey [name]! So nice to meet you, Keita said that you were coming!"

"O-oh yeah, nice to meet you too" You bowed at him, hiding the crimson rising to your face

"Yahhh, no need for formalities around me! It makes me feel old." Matthew ruffles your hair "Come in, come in!"

Matthew leads you to their living room where Keita was residing. Keita looks at you with an unpleasant look and pats the space beside him on the couch repeatedly and loudly.

"Be nicer to your friend, Keita!" Matthew playfully berates "Their a guest!"

"Yeah, yeah, stop shouting. You'll make my ears bleed."

"Be nicer to your older brother" You pipe in

"Don't tell me what to do, guest!"

Matthew laughs at the two of you, "I'll prepare drinks for the both of you! You like iced tea, [name]?" He looks at you

"Ofcourse! Anything will do haha" You smile

"Great! I'll get that prepared!" Matthew pats your back lightly and sets off to the kitchen

You sit down next to Keita as he stares at you in disgust, "Try not to drool over my brother challenge" He whispers

"Your brother is so cool, I can't believe you two are related." You whisper back

"I'm actually going to curse you out, be happy I even let you in here."

"Gosh, your brother is handsome and well-kept." You continue whispering as Keita deepens his disgusted stare, "So well-mannered and kind, he even asked if I liked Iced tea."

"Iced tea is all we have, idiot."

You shoot him a look, "Try being like your brother and maybe you'll get someone to look at you."

"DANG OKAY"

"Hope you guys are having fun!" Matthew comes in with two iced teas. It couldn't be helped but to notice his smile. His smile that showed so much of his pearly whites, it felt illegal to see premium content for free. The way that he sets two coasters for the iced teas so that the table wouldn't get wet was so endearing, his mother must have thought him well. The way that he told you and Keita to enjoy your time at their home made you think of how he must be such a caring brother and person overall. After finishing drinking your refreshments, he refused your help to clean up, one could only imagine how he must be a person of service.

Let's just say that Keita was even more reluctant to invite you over again.

-----

It was a Friday and classes were dismissed, but unfortunately, club time was scheduled so students couldn't go home yet. Well, it was unfortunate for most but not for you. Why? Club time was a time to see the person you joined the club for.

"Hurry up Keita!!"

"Damn be patient for one second, he probably isn't there yet!"

"Well I can't risk wasting a second to see him"

"Ok dang!" Keita huffs as he quickly shoves his things into his bag.

The two of you set off to your club room as you shared the same club, photography club, to be exact. As you reached the club room, a second-year classroom, it was already set in groups meaning that every four desks were put together to face one another. You hurried to sit at the group table upfront while Keita followed you. Both of you sat, facing one another.

"Remind me why I even joined."

"Because the club president is always open to share his limitless expertise on photography." You matter-a-factly say

"Well, well, well, don't we have two early-birds here."

You turned around towards the entrance door to see Park Hanbin, a senior and the club president, in all of his glory. He struts towards the front of the classroom and sits on the teacher's desk, "Don't mind me here, let's wait for the others to come. Go do whatever you kids do these days."

You try to subtlety stare at the blue-haired man who was looking at his camera's gallery, he was chic and never afraid to make a statement hence the blue hair. A confident man was so appealing as they would hold themselves in a manner that is sharp and takes your attention in a fraction of a second.

Keita couldn't help but roll his eyes at you and the situation he was in. It seemed as if his eyes would roll out of his eyes until two people approached your table.

"Uhm hey are these seats available or are you guys saving it for other people?" A boy with brown hair questions the two of you, behind him was another boy with black hair seemingly trying not to look at the both of you.

"Those seats are free, you can sit with us if that's what you intend." Keita answers for the both of you as you were to occupied admiring the club president still on his camera.

"Awesome! Thanks!" The brunette ushers the other boy to sit beside you and then sits beside Keita, "Oh, my name's Jay by the way and my friend over here is Kamden!"

"Eyy, I'm Keita and that over there is [name]. I wouldnt blame you if you forget their name, their pretty irrelevant." Keita smiles warmly at Jay and Kamden

"I think they're pretty cool.." Kamden murmurs side-eyeing you

"Really?" Keita looked like the whole world was upside down

"Ohh yeah! I think [name] is pretty cool too! Me and Kamden think everyone's cool!" Jay tries to laugh it off

"You guys sure are enthusiastic.. I like that!" Keita says enthusiastically to which Jay smiles widely to

More people started pouring in and soon Park Hanbin started to lecture the people in the classroom about types of photography. He shows his own examples of the type of photography he was explaining, be it shadows, clouds, and the lot.

A person listening to him could see how passionate he was about photography and what he was doing. The way he led the class on photography was exemplary and showed off the authority he had in the matter which was so very intriguing to you.

While you stared at Hanbin, Kamden stared at your focused state. Your eyes didn't waver from Hanbin at all and your hand jot down notes so quickly about what the club president was lecturing. Your dedication was entertaining compared to the long and never-ending talks of Hanbin.

Soon, another bell rung, signaling that club time was over but Park Hanbin didn't let anyone go yet. He had already locked the exit door prior and was guarding the entrance door. He had the key to exit door and was tauntingly showcasing it on the palm of his hand. His wit was applaudable to you and you didn't mind doing overtime unlike the others who were waiting to go home.

Once Hanbin had actually finished his lecture and dismissed the class, he didn't forget to tell everyone that he was free for any questions anytime. You couldn't help but sigh, you were enthralled at how the boy was willing to sacrifice so much time on photography.

"We should definitely hang out together sometime!" Keita finger-guns Jay and Kamden

"Yo, that'd be awesome! You love that idea dont you, Kamden?" Jay wiggles his eyebrows

"If it's alright with [name]"

"Eh, don't worry about them. Hey, [name]!" Keita calls for your attention

"Y-yeah?" You say caught off-guard by your day-dreaming

"Y-y-y-yeah" Keita mocks you

"Not cool" Kamden says while Jay laughs and pats Kamden on the back, seemingly trying to play what Kamden said as a joke.

"Because I'm a nice person who's considerate of others' feelings, I would like to ask you if it'd be alright to hang out with these fine gentlemen." Keita shows off Jay and Kamden

You roll your eyes and finally get a good look at the two boys whom you didn't pay much attention to earlier. You pointed at Kamden, shaking your index finger. He was familiar and you were trying to remember where you knew him from. Kamden starts to fidget with his hands under the weight of your stare.

"Leave the poor man alone, [name]. I'm your only friend, don't scare off potential other friends."

"N-no, it's alright." Kamden's face starts to turn slightly red and the pace of his fidgeting hands quicken.

You suddenly snap your fingers, "You were my classmate once, yeah?" You excitedly ask after remembering

"Oh, yeah" Kamden cooly says, stopping his hands from fidgeting.

"Great! You know each other, let's hang out!" Jay excitedly claps, jumping up and down.

"Yeah, you guys totally made that boring lecture fun." Keita smiles

"You wouldn't be saying that if you listened." You defend your club president.

"I did try to, but I couldn't because it was boring." Keita shows you a thumbs-down.

"I thought it was fun" Kamden says monotonously

"Ofcourse you found it fun" Jay wiggles his eyebrows

------

"[name]" A gruff voice calls out to you

You look over to Keita and see him awake

"Whew, you're alive" You jokingly whisper, though a part of you wasn't really joking.

"I've been awake for a while now" Keita admits to you

"Oh"

"And I've been thinking that I should just let you be on your love for older guys."

"Yah, let's not talk about that for now." You say not wanting to feel even more guilty.

"I can actually hook you up with an older guy, you know?"

"What? I said let's not talk about that right now."

"You were born on 2001, right"

"Same year as you" You say, giving up and soaking in your guilt.

"You know Kamden was born in the year 2000."

"He's in the year level as us though? Our year is only filled with people born in 2001 to 2002, as far as I know."

"Yeah he and his twin were placed in our grade level during first grade, for some reason, probably enrolled late."

"Oh"

"He always acted older than us, no?"

"Oh"

"I could help you guys get together"

"Oh"

"Did I mention that he was the older twin?"

"Oh"

You sat in silence as Keita kept talking. You didn't know that Kamden was older than you, you always assumed you were the same age.

"Keita, you're awake! You wouldn't believe how mad Ms. Lee was at Kamden!" Jay threw himself at Keita

"Hey" You jumped slightly on your seat as Kamden placed his hand on your shoulder, "I just said hey, no need to be scared." Keita chuckles lowly at you, his Adam's apple moving ever so slightly.

Was Kamden's voice this deep? Did Kamden have eudermic hands all this time? Why is Kamden looking at you so intensely?

"Did you drink the water I gave you?"

You could only nod. This make Kamden tilt his head at you and scrunch his eyebrows together. He looked like a lost cat, you thought. His eyes were sparkling like a cat's. His hair was fluffy like cat's fur. His pink pout resembled a cat's smile when its purs.

"Yo Kamden, what's your type?" Keita loudly asks for the boy's attention, holding Jay in his arms

"Hey, hey?" Jay questions, smiling and wiggling his eyebrows like he always does

"Why?" Kamden plainly asks

"Oh you know.." Keita ponders for a short while, "Someone might be interested in you and I happen to be their helper."

"Well, they shouldn't really change themselves for me if that's the case."

Was Kamden always thoughtful? You asked yourself, and then your thoughts started to spiral. Did Kamden ever care for other people? Was Kamden always this considerate of others? Now that you thought about it, Kamden always acted more mature than the average person your age.

"It's club time right?" Keita asks and everyone turned to look at you expectantly. That included Kamden, who was now looking back at you.

Unknowingly you had been staring at Kamden but you didn't break your gaze as he reciprocated your stare. His eyes were intriguing, a really dark brown that was almost black. It was under small lids and small eyelashes and over slightly dark eyebags. Kamden always took his studies seriously, it wasn't a secret to you that he didn't want to be overtaken by his twin brother, hence, why he worked hard. Kamden always worked hard, you remembered how he would always be awake at late hours of the night. Citing the times you would message him during those late hours and he would always respond, under the reason that he was awake because of an assignement or studying. Now that you thought about it, Kamden was always available for you, when either Jay was asleep or Keita was ignoring you, Kamden always answered whatever idiocracy or academic question you had. His attentiveness towards you had made you more motivated as his his constant help made an assignment easier, a sad moment less sad, and a day happier. You could always rely on Kamden to be there for you, always.

"Earth to [name]" Keita mimics an echo, repeating your name repeatedly and each time in a softer volume all the while smirking

"Oh yeah what is it?" You snap out of your trance and look over to Keita

"I said, isn't it club right now?"

"Ohh yeahh" You suddenly remembered

"So, I can't go and I need someone to bring me home because my mom can't pick me up" Keita smugly says

"Maybe [name] can bring you home." Jay suggests as he quickly brings his index finger to Keita's mouth to sush him and quickly retracts it, seemingly trying to stop Keita from refusing his suggestion.

"No, club is important to [name]. I can bring you home." Kamden refutes Jay's suggestion

Kamden really is thoughtful, you thought.

Kamden's statement seemingly makes Jay and Keita smile knowingly at each other, "You know what? I remembered that I left my house key in Jay's locker. Jay should bring me home."

"Oh yeah, right, totally. Kamden and [name], you guys go to club without us, I'll bring Keita home." Jay says gesturing the both of his hands for the both of you to go.

"Alright" Kamden looks suspiciously at the pair and gently pulls on your forearm, signaling for the both of you to go, "You don't want to be anymore late, yeah?"

Kamden really was well-mannered, you remembered how he would always touch you gently whenever needed. You also remembered how he would always remind you of things whether it'd be to take care of yourself or of other things, Kamden was always so put-together, "Yeah".

--------

"Well, well, well, I'd never thought the two of you would be late." Park Hanbin's voice booms in the middle of his lecture as he sees Kamden and [name] entering from the front door, "Especially this late"

"Apologies, our friend wanted to see us at the clinic before going home. Keita and Jay won't be present." Kamden says quickly to Hanbin

"Ahh, yes, yes, I guess one of you youngsters was the one who choked earlier lunch." Hanbin clasps his hands together, "Well, hurry up and get seated, I'll excuse your tardiness today. Try not to get in any more trouble, kay? [name], right?"

Kamden nods for you as you seemed to be pre-occupied being in a daze and softly grabs your wrist to lead you to the unoccupied seats at the back.

Once the two of you were seated, Kamden found difficulty in letting you wrist go. Sure, the two of you had frequent physical contact but it led for the boy to yearn for more. You were warm on days that he wanted warmth and you were cold on days that he wanted to cool down. Simply holding you for a few seconds wasn't enough.

But Kamden had to have boundaries, he didn't want to make you uncomfortable, that was what he didn't want to do the most. So, he lets go of you. He stares at you longingly, you were looking down at your desk, so he couldn't necessarilly see your face well. It didn't matter though as he remembers your face well, already having memorized you from his moments with you, moments where you were afar, and moments in his imagination.

Whether you were frowning, smiling or resting, Kamden found his eyes at ease in making you the default to look at. When your face rests, Kamden rests, making looking at you an easy job that paid in time seeing you, a better pay was almost non-existent. When your face frowns, Kamden worries. He doesn't frown incase it would lower your spirits down, rather, he tries to cheer you up indirectly, whether it'd be buying you drinks or taking care of measly tasks for you. When he knows what's making you frown or when you tell him yourself, he's more than motivated to give you small words of encouragement. When your face smiles, Kamden tries not to smile. It's almost impossible but he manages everytime to hold his smile in. He's the happiest when you smile genuinely because it's what makes you happy.

Kamden wants to be happy. That's what a normal person wants.

So, he started talking with Park Hanbin a while ago. He asked for an opportunity to see the upperclassmen in the guise that he wanted extra photography lessons. The ulterior motive was to get the older boy to take an interest in you. In the so called "extra photography lessons", he would slip in a good word or two about you. After the lesson, he would ask for another one, continuing his act of making you look good infront of Hanbin. It wasn't hard as he would just list down the things he liked about you. When he would take pictures of clouds, he would tell Hanbin how you were imaginative and creative, how you frequently said how a cloud resembled a persian cat you once owned named "Grill", no matter how far from the truth the cloud was. When Hanbin would tell him to change his shutter speed, Kamden would relay how you would always explain the different shutter speeds to him for different outputs, saying how diligent of a club member of the photography club you were and how you would always listen to Hanbin's lectures.

Soon enough, he didn't have to try and involve you in the lessons as Hanbin would now be the one to frequently ask questions about you. Hanbin was well-mannered, passionate and most importantly, older than you.

That's what you had always wanted in a partner, the two of you would be a good match, you would be happy. Kamden would always think about you being happy. That would make him happy.

Kamden reminisces the older times

-----------

It was a sunny day, much to everyone's luck from a certain class in 4th grade. It was this class' class field trip day to an aquarium. Kamden wouldn't lie, he was happy to spend time with his friends socializing for once. So, he looked forward for the field trip.

On the bus ride to the aquarium, obnoxious noise resounded from the back. Kamden looks back and sees the infamous group of boys from his class who were known to be free-loaders on group assignments and obnoxious in general.

Unfortunately, Kamden was groupmates for school projects with one of the boys from that group. What was worse was that he was the group leader and had just enough of the free-loading boy. This led to Kamden snitching to his teacher about how the boy had never contributed anything and pleading for fair treatment. Kamden could only surmise that the teacher had a talking-to with the boy as the boy was unusually less-vulgar around him, it made him uneasy. This uneasiness wasn't reduced in any way as he would be almost sure that he'd hear his name every now and then whenever the group of obnoxious boys talked with each other.

Once the bus dropped off the class at the aquarium, the field trip went smoothly. Kamden was having fun with his friends, pointing at sharks and unique sea creatures along the way. That was until a bucket of ice cream was splattered across the hallway they were walking on. The culprit? The group of obnoxious free-loading boys, though some of the boys were missing and that included Kamden's free-loading groupmate.

"Oh no. Hey Kamden fetch us a mop would ya? You're the tallest after all." One of the obnoxious boys smugly asks

"Why should he? You guys made that mess." Kamden turns his head to see that you were the one to defend him.

"Well Mrs. Ban sure would stop this field trip if she found out that we made a mess, that's her nature. Doesn't matter who did it, everyone will face the consequence." One of the obnoxious boys seethed, "Let's not waste time, shall we? The sooner you get this cleaned, the more chance that Mrs. Ban won't find out."

You looked like you were going to say something back but Kamden wanted to get this over with, "Alright, I'll get a mop." Kamden turns to the other direction to set out for the cleaning supplies.

Kamden remembers that an aquarium staff had instructed the class to clean up after any mess they made and mapped out where the cleaning supplies were.

"So you're just going to follow me?" Kamden awkwardly side-eyes you

"I thought that maybe the mop might be too big or heavy for you to carry alone."

"Oh" He dryly says

"Where's Mrs. Ban anyway, isn't she supposed to watch over us?" You try to make conversation

"Yeah.." Kamden really didn't know how to respond to you

The two of you walked in silence, Kamden never really interacted with you in class and never bumped into you in past school years, so, it was akward to talk to you now. Kamden and you further set out to the cleaning supplies and then reached the echinoderms part of the aquarium. The aquarium became quiet. He guessed that no one found echinoderms interesting. Though, that silence was quickly shattered,

"Well if it isn't the snitch, Kamden." His free loading groupmate tauntingly says, "The snitch Kamden, fell right into my trap."

The other missing members of the obnoxious group laugh, revealing themselves.

"And now, he's gonna pay for being a snitch." The obnoxious boys crack their knuckles while Kamden is paralyzed, not knowing what to do. He was outnumbered, but so he thought.

"Did you know that starfishes are part of echinoderms." You say matter-a-factly rather than questioning, "Starfishes unlike their organism name aren't actually fishes, they don't have gills, scales, or fins like a normal fish, and also have no blood."

You continue your banter, not letting anyone interrupt you by raising you tone of voice whenever someone did try. Kamden stares at and listens to you. He never really saw this side of you, you were loud and guarding when needed to, he guessed. The more he listened to you, the more he assumes that you were passionate about certain things, like starfishes, he guessed. Though he was confused at your sudden banter, he couldn't really complain, as it was preventing him from being beaten up. Soon enough, your banters were becoming interesting to him.

"Starfish are actually edible and safe to consume but certain species are poisonous and dangerous, so, be careful on what kind of starfish you eat. That's how my cat died." You suddenly halt your banter.

Kamden snaps out of his trance and looks to where the group of obnoxious boys were. They weren't there anymore.

"Seemed like you scared them off." Kamden tries to awkwardly joke with you, "Oh uh, sorry about your cat."

----------

"Hey Kamden, what club should we join?" Jay excitedly shakes Kamden, "There's so many options"

As Jay jumps up and down, Kamden stares at you and Keita who were conversing, just infront of him and Jay. It was club opening day, wherein multiple booths of each club were placed in the school field, to let students to choose their clubs and for club officers to recruit people into their clubs. Though it was noisy and there were a lot of people passing by, he could still hear your's and Keita's conversation.

"You're joining photography club for a singular guy?" Keita asks in disbelief

"Well, that singular guy is extremely talented."

"Extremely talented at scaring and boreing people away."

"You don't have to join me, I'm not changing my mind." You cross your arms, "Besides, I'm not hurting anyone by my own choice."

Keita groans, "You do know that you're my only friend right now, can you be a little lenient?"

"I'm joining photography club."

Jay seems to catch on to what Kamden was distracted by, "Heyy, you're staring at them again"

"Huh, oh what, no."

"Hmmm sure, what's their name by the way?"

"[name]"

"So you were staring at them! No less eavesdropping!"

Kamden's eyes widen, "Lower your voice, would you?"

"Photography club, huh. I heard the club president is scary but I guess their adamant on joining."

"Their always passionate on what they like."

Jay wiggles his eyebrows at Kamden who has not stopped staring at you, "You know what? I kinda want to join the photography club, Kamden."

---------

"Here" Kamden gives you a drink

"What is this for?"

"Nothing, I just thought to give you some."

"You keep buying me drinks, I'm starting to feel guilty."

"You always feel guilty when you shouldn't. Besides, you buy me food a lot of the time, don't you remember?"

"I guess.."

Kamden sits beside you on the bench. Silence sets in, the both of you don't hang out much alone without Keita and Jay. It just so happened that you and Keita fought, and Jay went off to cool Keita down.

"Do you and Jay fight alot?" You break the silence

"I ignore him alot but Jay isn't the type to argue."

"Do you argue?"

"Not really, arguing is tiring." Kamden pats your back gently, "Though, it's normal to fight. It happens when you care enough for something or someone."

You stay silent, sipping on the drink Kamden gave you.

"Not to say I don't care for Jay." Kamden laughs awkwardly, "It's just that people have different ways of showing how they care for things."

"I get what your saying now, you can stop being uncomfortable. Sorry I involved you guys." You take a sip of your drink, "You know, you sound like a 70-year old guy sometimes."

"So you're into me?" Kamden joke

You laugh and clutch your stomach, not being able to stop laughing. Kamden chuckles, your smile was enticing. It was serene and alleviated the stress he was currently going through. He then realizes that it was always like that, his problems seemed to be solved whenever you were around, even if you just simply smiled. What you did to him was amazing.

"You know, I started liking older guys since I was a kid." You said in between laughs, "There was this teenager who worked at the zoo my family frequented at and he would always entertain the kids. He was handsome, confident but well-mannered, would cheer up any kid crying, and would slip a piece of candy every now and then. He'd tell me facts about wildlife, but he was especially passionate about sea animals, more specifically, starfishes. He said they were the easiest to look after. His words influenced me so much that I would beg my family to buy me a starfish but they found it weird. One day the guy asked me if I wanted to look after something for him. I said yes because I wanted to impress him and so, he gave me a white fluffy cat. My family was mad because they'd thought that I stole an animal from the zoo. So, they took me and the cat back to the zoo, only to find out that the cat wasn't part of the zoo's care and that the guy that gave me the cat quit the day of. My family decided that I should just keep the cat. I don't really remember much of what happened during that time but a thought always stuck to me, I'm going to marry a guy just like him."

Kamden listened to you intensely throughout your talk.

"I'm sorry, I probably bored you to death" you chuckle

"No, no. I like hearing whatever you have to say." It was true, he always did, and he always wants to hear you. He always wants to see you, he always wants to be close to you, but he wasn't your type. So, Kamden tries ever so slightly to not smile at you, afraid that he might want you more. He didn't want to reach a point where he would try to take you, try to ruin your dreams of marrying an older guy.

-------

Kamden stares at you, you were still looking down at your table. He couldn't deny the fact that he didn't want you, he loved you. Wanting you was superficial, he didn't want to claim or force you to be there with him 24/7, he just wanted you happy. He realized that when he started setting you and Hanbin together. If he wanted you, he wouldn't be doing what he did. Who didn't want you to be happy though? Your face was too loveable, your eyes yearned for passion, your lips creased to spread melodies of joy, and you were staring back at him.

Kamden gets caught off guard, how long have you been staring back at him?

"And that's it for today! You're all dismissed, except you, [name], can you stay for a bit?" Park Hanbin disrupts Kamden's thoughts.

This was it. Kamden thought. He gently pats your shoulder and gives you a thumbs up. You look confusedly at him.

"Good luck" Kamden whispers to you, subtly pointing at Hanbin with his thumb.

As he starts to walk towards the door, you stand up to follow him but he stops you at your place, "Don't ruin this for me" he whispers to you and quickly exits the scene.

--------

It was 4 A.M. in the morning, Kamden had trouble sleeping. "How were you doing?" Circled in his mind a lot. He didn't reply to any messages Jay and Keita sent him, asking him how his time with you went. Infact, he had turned his phone off as soon as he reached his bed from school.

"Ding"

A notification went off on his phone. It was you. He only had his notifications on for you. He rushed to open his phone.

"Can you come to that Cafe next to school tomorrow? 12PM? I'm nervous. Bring your tumbler by the way"

Before he rushed to respond to you, he saw a text message from Hanbin that was sent earlier at 6PM.

"Hey, hey, hey, Kamden! tha cafe nxt to the schol tmrrw @12PM!!!"

Hanbin had asked you out on a date. You were probably nervous so he responds to your text message to agree to be the third-wheel.

"Yeah. Goodluck. Dont be nervous, I'll be there :)" Kamden responds only to you. He waits for your reply that doesn't come.

--------

11:00AM, Kamden was one hour early. Due to the lack of sleep, he had forgotten his phone but somehow remembered to bring his water bottle.

11:30AM, You arrive, Kamden doesn't make himself known, to try and not disrupt any momentum on your date with Hanbin.

12:00PM, Hanbin was supposed to arrive by now, maybe he was just a little late. You start texting away on your phone.

12:30PM, Hanbin still hadn't arrived, Kamden started to get angry. He would've texted Hanbin himself asking where was he but he didn't have his phone with him.

1:00PM, It seemed like you were stood up, so you left the cafe.

Kamden couldn't express how angry he was, you? Were stood up? Kamden thought that Hanbin was a man, a man good enough for you. But he assumed wrong. He was angry at himself for assuming so wrong, for letting you get stood up. He follows you out the cafe.

"Hey, [name]! I'm sorry, I didn't know he would be that type of guy." He says catching up to you

"Oh, there you are. Where were you?" You ask seemingly upset at Kamden

"I was in the cafe, I didn't want to interrupt your date with Hanbin but he never showed up." Kamden sighs "I'm so sorry [name]"

"Date? I just texted you to meet me at the Cafe at 12. What do you mean date with Hanbin?" You ask, growing frustrated.

"Oh, you weren't going on a date with Hanbin?" Kamden looks confusedly at you, infamously tilting his head.

"No! I just wanted to talk with you, what made you think that?"

"Oh well you guys talked alone yesterday, so I thought.."

"So you thought what? Look, I just wanted to talk to you. I don't know how you reached to that conclusion." You look away at Kamden, too frustrated.

"I'm sorry it's just that I was trying to make Hanbin like you by telling him nice things about you and that's why I thought he asked you out on a date yesterday." Kamden confesses to you

"What?" You look back at Kamden

Kamden stays silent, accepting his fate that you were going to end your friendship right then and there.

"So, you were just trying to set us together?" You gulp down on your words, "So, you don't like me?"

Kamden's eyes widen, "I like you! No, I love you! Wait, where? I love you a lot. Where did you hear that, love?" Once he ended his sentence, he wanted to end his life. Why would he say it like that?

"So, you like me?" You confusedly ask

"I love you" He couldn't stop his mouth from opening and releasing awkward things out in the wild

"I love you too then."

Kamden doesn't believe your words, "What about Hanbin?"

"Hanbin? He told me that you liked me alot. He said that you wouldn't stop talking about me."

"Oh"

"I love you" You smile awkwardly at Kamden

Kamden puts his hands on either sides of your shoulders, "I was born on June 9, 2001, emphasis on 2001, the same year as you. I'm not any older than you are."

"Oh really?" You weren't surprised anymore that Keita would lie to you, "That doesn't change anything though. I love you." You smile awkwardly yet again at Kamden.

"Why though?" Kamden raises his voice, bringing his hands up to the nape of your neck, "I'm not older than you, like that guy from the zoo."

"You remembered." You say not surprised, "That's why I love you."

Your answer was vague but Kamden understood you, he always did, "You know I'm the younger twin right?" He asks in disbelief, bringing his hands up from your nape to cup your face.

"I love you."

Kamden doesn't say it back but he does bring your faces closer to one another. Close enough that his lips touched yours.

_______

This story has reached to its end. I don't know whether or not Kamden is the younger twin or not, I pulled it out of my ass. A lot of what I wrote was pulled out from my ass. If you saw that Chainsaw Man reference, you didn't. I'm sorry if you read all of that and found it underwhelming or not good in general. I tried my best. I might make a ZB1 x reader fiction story, might. Thank you for spending your time reading.

------

#na kamden #boys planet kamden #na kamden x reader #kamden x reader #boys planet kamden x reader #boys planet imagines #kamden imagines #na kamden imagines

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teeth--king · 8 months

Note

Eats your Stardew Valley Elliott art

anyways! Ive seen barely anyone do this but what do you think Elliotts’ backstory is? Like what’s his relationship with his parents? You can draw and/or write it if you want :)

(i crave angsty backstory for Elliott…because I love him…)

Please, feast away! It brings me so much happiness that people are enjoying my Stardew Valley art so much! I usually make my own personal art, so dabbling in a little fan art and it going so well is very appreciated.(also all the nice comments and tags, those fuel me and make me go forward each day)

But for the main part of the ask, it takes so much for my little writer self to not just go hog wild and re-create characters who I get attached to. I have a love hate relationship with this, but it's very easy to do with Stardew characters because they are all so blank slate, those little buddies can be what ever you want because they are the perfect level of lovable yet bland. As for Elliott, yeah I'm a little more on the angsty side of backstory for him, partially from some dialogue and partially from some projecting, haha.

I am not the worlds best writer(despite the fact that it's technically what I do) so I apologize if any of this is a bit rough or odd sounding :P I also feel odd about writing and sharing backstories for already made characters as a creative myself, so this might also be a bit awkwardly worded on my end as well. So just a little heads up before my rambling thoughts below.

So I've always read him as no longer connected to his family due to his passions and actually following them. He's distanced himself from most people in his past, some intentionally and some outside of his control, to try and become who he actually wants to be. I feel like before he came to Stardew Valley he was working his ass off by not gracefully juggling both a job and trying to write at the same time, probably developed some bad habits during those times to cope. He tries to not show it and mask but being kind and welcoming(sometimes overly so if in a rough spot), he has too much ego to let others know he's not doing well chasing his dreams. After moving to Stardew Valley he's started to do a bit better but he's even more of a starving artist because he's just living off savings, most of which he used to buy the cabin. Man's got a male living space by slight necessity but plays it off as being a minimalist. Also no idea where I would place this otherwise, but he gives me the vibe that he has a more public facing persona where he's more flowery and puts on a slight voice, while in reality he's just a dude(still poetic tho, he can't stop that, theater kid vibes).

Ironically trying to not make him too much like my character Elliot. Both of these men are my current stress toys and I am throwing them around so much in my mind.

Ah! Thank you so much for this ask, it was a wonderful distraction for my night! I love answering stuff and getting to get my thoughts out of my head somehow. They are quite loud in there so I'm pleased to have them out and about now. This likely isn't everything but my brain works in such scattered and anxious ways that I am not sure. Thank you again!

#ask #stardew valley #stardew elliott #no clue if I should tag that but ah. guess so for at least my own blogs sorting

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noodlefluid · 1 year

Note

I HAVE A RISE X READER ASKKK post krang invasion. donnie and reader are hanging out in his lab. donnie is upset bc he misses his old lab and the tech he had, now he has to build everything from scratch again. reader is chilling on one of donnies many spinny chairs and gets curious abt how his life was before the krang invaded, reader starts asking questions abt his lab and life n stuff.

he tells them how cool his lab was and the adventures they had and how they fought villians, then donnie brings up jupiter jim and the reader is like “what’s that??” and from then on, donnie is scavenging the base, looking for the comics (maybe the comics can be in leos room and they have a lil argument bc leo wants to know why donnie needs his comics and donnies ashamed to admit he wanted to get them so he can read them to reader) after donnie retrieves the comics he shows them to the reader and the two of them chill w each other, reading all of the jupiter jim comics

Never the same | Donnie×Reader

▪︎Sumary

Donnie gets nostalgic about his past life and start talking about it. After you ask him about one of his favorite super heroes, Donnie decides he have to show it to you no matter what.

❥Type: Fanfic

❥Characters: Donnie Leo Reader

❥Reader's pronouns: no mention

❥Relationship: Crush (implied)

❥Autor notes: Hi, sorry for the delay. This is my first request and therefore I wanted it to be the first one I published,I think this ended up being more focused on donnie and leo, but I hope you still like it . Also, please remember this is my first time writing and that english isn't my first language, any mistake either in writing style, grammar or just any suggestion in general is welcome, but please be kind :)

Warning: probably ooc leo and donnie, Angst, verbal argument, y/n is bland as hell lol, minor swearing

Word count:3225

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ »◦✿◦« ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

“ugh…” Donnie was looking at one of his latest invention, it didn't go as planned and it was starting to annoy him, this was already fifteenth try and it was going nowhere

You were sitting in a chair beside him, spinning to beat the boredom and just trying to disconnect with the world for a moment, but as soon as you heard the sigh leave the purple turtle’s lips you stop what you were doing “What's wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s just…this stupid thing doesn’t work” you could see the frustration in his face, he was agitated, he groaned out of frustration “This wouldn’t happened if I just had my old lab”

Curiosity began to flourish from the moment these words were uttered. Even when the four brothers were seen as heroes, no one really knew too much about them, and no one could be bothered to ask either, we were in and out of danger every single day. Still, the atmosphere of this half-built lab make you feel nostalgic, you were starting to miss normal even when you sometimes complained about how boring was your past life, you were missing those exact moment of boring.

You met the brothers once they saved you in one of the many rescues they performed after the krang began to invade New York and finally the whole world. A world of suffering, where humans and yokai struggled together trying to survive the apocalypse. Maybe it was because of the way you encountered them for the first time, but it didn't take you long to get attached to them.. Especially, the purple one, Donatello, he never left the base unless necessary since he was responsible for maintaining the shields, because of that you saw him often. Donnie took his job seriously, always making some sort of gadget to make missions easier and faster. You spent a lot of time around him, it seemed to bother him at first but now he was more used to your presence. It was probably because of this that you started to feel curious about the past of the turtles that saved your life, and this was just the perfect moment to ask

“How was it?” You asked, looking at the ground due to nervousness

“hmm? what do you mean?” The mutant looked away from his work to pay attention to you

“your lab, how was it?"

Donnie's face immediately light up “Oh my dear y/n, it was magnificent” He turn his whole body to you, noticeably excited to talk about it “I had so many inventions and material, you would be impress, a-and” The excitement make him trip over his word “Not to brag but the aesthetics were, heh, just marvelous, if I say myself, the purple LEDs and my incredible organization make my lab the best room in our...home” he sigh that last word, leaning back on his chair “I’m sure you would have loved it...I use to spend days in between those walls. I had this drone named S.H.E.L.L.D.O.N, he was sometimes annoying, but he was my pride, almost like a son to me, he was severed damage in a fight, and just when I managed to bring him back… this happened” He looked annoyed but you could feel the sadness on his words, he keep talking. “I just kinda wish this lab could make itself, you know?, now it just messy and doesn’t look scientific enough, my old lab had everything a turtle could wish, it was perfect”

“Well, I think is nice tho” you felt stupid for saying that and gave yourself a mental slap in the face, he didn't need kind words, it was a dumb

“Yeah…it is "nice", but I miss my old one, and…well, I guess my whole life in the lair” He sounded a little down there, looking somewhere between his work and blueprints

“How…how was your life before?" You feel imprudent for a moment, you already make him quite sad, and you were just putting salt on an open wound. Sometimes you hated your curiosity “if…if you don’t mind me asking, I-I understand if you don’t…” your voice reflected a bit of shyness as you spoke faster than usual, it didn't matter if you were friends with the turtle, he still was your superior, and most important,the hero of the apocalipse, you always tried to treat him with respect, but the familiarity was such that you sometimes forgot to put your filter on

Donnie gives you a little smile “It's okay." Of course the turtle was oblivious to your thoughts, he didn't care about ranks between you two "Well…hmm" He started talking "we were just hiding in the sewer, we couldn’t really go out that much. I think It is one of the few things I like about now, we can interact with humans without scaring them away” He looked puzzled, hesitant, probably asking himself what was worth telling “we were…usually fighting again some mutant who was dumb enough to use their power for evilish things, those oozquitoes where quiet the trouble”

You opened your eyes, news were full of strange event about people turning into monster, one of them being the world famous chef Rupert Swaggart, but you actually never pay too much attention to it, since it always ended up solving itself in some strange circumstance, now you knew the true “Wait, it was you? that it's so awesome” Your eyes were sparkling of excitement, just when you thought they couldn’t be cooler "Those incident were everywhere, I actually thought they were just some kind of stuff TV came up with for the audience or something like that, b-but it was you?, it must have been fun, you're amazing Donnie" This just add to the reasons you admired the turtle brothers

Donnie's cheeks burn at the compliment, he try to hide it “Yes, it was fun. Although I preferred it when we were just relaxing in the lair, making fun of the last stupid thing Leo did, playing video games, and when the only fights we had were over who got the last slice of pizza or which Jupiter Jim movie we were going to see first, you know?” He spoke softly, looking down and making a few gesture with his hands here and there while speaking

You looked at him confused. “What's that?” you asked

“What's what?”

“That umm.. Jupiter…Jim?” you were quiet for a few seconds trying to figure out if you had said it correctly, after deciding that you did you start talking again “What it is?”

Donnie looks at you like if you had insulted all his ancestry “Captain Jupiter Jim? you don’t know who captain Jupiter Jim is?!” You started thinking that this had to be really important for one of the Hamato brothers to be this defensive, maybe it has something to do with their training? perhaps a really important figure in the ninja world?. Donatello looked thoughtful you were gonna ask about it but you were interrupted as the soft shell suddenly stood up with a determined look “I need to go” and with that the turtle walked out his lab leaving you even more confused

« • ❁ • »

Donnie went into Leonardo’s room, he was the biggest fan, so it wouldn’t be weird for him to have the comics and maybe the movies that were saved from the lair. He was searching in the bookshelf

“What are you doing?” the sudden sound of a voice make him jump, slamming his back against the shelf and knocking some things over., it was his twin brother

Donnie didn't know whether knowing who the voice was coming from made him panicked more or relieved...he was panicking obviously. “uh- um…no-nothing?, nothing! not searching for anything here” the soft-shell turtle picked up the thing that fall from the bookshelf while speaking

Leo looked at his brother with obvious oddity “uh…sure” the blue turtle throw his odachi on his bed, he was just arriving from a mission and totally didn’t expect to see his brother trying to steal something, he keep making eye contact with Donnie, he knew how to get responses from him “so?”

“s-so what?” Donnie try to maintain the eye contact

“What ya looking for? Need your big brother's help?” Leo smiled teasingly, it was weird to see Donnie so nervous, and he was gonna tease the hell out of him to get answers

“I just said I wasn’t looking for anything, and for the last time, it is obvious that I’m the older Nardo.”

“uh-huh…yeah, sure” Leo looked unimpressed of both statements

“As I say, I wasn’t looking for anything, since anything that belong to the such of you it’s probably unworthy” Donnie broke the eye contact first, looking at the door, obviously wanting to escape from this situation

Leo saw his intentions and immediately put himself as a barrier between his brother and the door “Well, if my belongings are so unworthy, what were you doing in my chambers?” he made a mocking gesture along with the last word, kinda proud of himself for using book words

“I-I…um” he stuttered trying to find the correct words to leave this situation “You know…I was just doing normal typical brotherly things, just uh…wanting to spend time with my favorite brother” Those last two words had a bitter taste in donnie's mouth.

Leo couldn’t help but laugh “I’m your favorite brother?” he continued laughing so much that tears started to come out “That was a good one Dee hehe…so what do you want?” The face of the blue turtle turn serious with the last sentence

“I said it was nothing” Donatello hissed annoyed “...but just by chance, have you seen those jupiter jim comics?” He finally admitted,

“Ah ha! you did want something” Leo shouted victorious, just to realize about something not even a second later “Wait…Why do you want my comics?” Leonardo knew his brother, this was suspicious behavior, Donnie was something special when it comes to comics.

“Why do I have to tell you everything? Do you have them or not?” The soft-shell bark his words at his brother, trying to hide his embarrassment, if Leo was to know the reason, he would never hear the end of it

“I do have then, but I'm not giving them to you if you don’t tell me, so start talking” Leonardo insisted, it sounded like a command which make Donnie even more nervous

“I’m not telling you”

“Then you won’t have the comics”

“But I need them”

“Then talk."

Both twins were known for their stubbornness, they never gave to others, much less to each other.. Their fight could last hours if you let them, and one of their brothers always had to interfere. They stared at each other once again with flaming eyes, trying to intimidate the other

“Why do you want to know?”

“Because" The other replied "I’m talking to the person who cried when he had to open his comic without gloves”

“I didn’t cry!”

“You did!”

“Ugh! whatever, just give me the comic for einstein sake” Donnie’s fist clenched

“Just tell me why you want them!” Leo demand once more

“I just want to...read them”

"Why can't you just tell me the true?"

"I JUST DON'T WANT TO" The soft shell shouted, making his twins take a step back, both looking at each other surprised. The purple turtle covered his own mouth, he wasn't expecting to yell

Leo sighed, he didn't wanna fight with his brother for some dumb comics, he has more important thing to worry about, and knowing Donatello, he knew he wouldn't tell a thing if he didn't want to "Fine…no need to yell, I was just teasing" He sighed once again, not dearing to look at his brother

Donatello had a complicated expression. Back in the lair, they would keep screaming at each other until Raphael or Michelangelo made them stop, they would keep teasing at each other, maybe go physic, but at the end of the day they wouldn't even apologize, at least not with words, they would hang out in one of their room or Donnie's lab and have those unspoken conversations they always had. But this wasn't the lair or their past lives, there were just so much that wasn't the same, even when they were still living together, they never see each other, they were starting to feel like strangers, and it make Donatello feel insecure "I-I'm...sorry…I didn't- I" he spoke tripping over his own words. Donnie felt pathetic, starting to fidget with his fingers, his breath a little accelerated, avoiding any eye contact

"Hey, hey, It's okay, don't worry" Leonardo tried to comfort his brother, smiling and making sure the other knew he wasn't angry or anything while searching for something under his bed. A cardboard box "Here..." Leo offer the box to the other mutant

Donatello took a closer look at the box, inside there were not only the Jupiter Jim comics, but also some action figures, posters, among other stuff from the franchise "umm…thanks" both brother were uncomfortable, neither of them were good with "feelings" and "sincere moments"

"Yeah yeah, but next time just ask, don't come to my room to snoop around like a creep, you weirdo." Leonardo teased Donnie, trying to make the atmosphere a little less serious, it was starting to suffocating them both

The comment make the other laugh a little, but he covered his mouth to not give the him a clue "Scoff" he looked away

"Oh, shut up."

Donnie finally had the comics, now it was time to show them to you, were you gonna like them? What if you didn't like them? He went through all those problems, if you didn't like them he would probably cry internally.

« • ❁ • »

Donnie sends you a message to come to his lab. You were still confused about the events from early on, but maybe he needed you for something important, it wasn't weird to ask you to test his inventions. When you arrived at the turtle's lab, he was on his desk looking at something, but you couldn't see it.

He then noticed you standing on the entrance "Finally!" the mutant spoke, he get up of his seat and walk towards you, taking you by the shoulder and sitting you on omce of the chairs, you then saw the thing he was looking at, there were various comics with Jupiter Jim as the title in it

"What's all this?" You asked

"This, my dear y/n, is one of the best comic and movie franchises of all. And I just can't be friends with you if you don't know about this" Donnie has bright eyes, you could see how they were sparkling on excitement

"So...It's this the thing you talked about early?" You take on of the comics and give it a quick look at it, all your theories of a great and important ninja figure collapse with one glance, it was just a comic

"First of all, you can't call it "thing", this is a super valuable collection of Jupiter Jim merchandise" He takes the comic off your hands "second, you shall treat it with respect" he sat beside you. You couldn't help but laughed at how serious he was about those comics, it was hard to believe that the great Hamato Donatello, the smartest living being and one of your saviors, could be so excited about sometime so childish, your heart feel all fuzzy and warm inside.

The mutant searched sometimes inside the box, it looked like he was looking for something specific “ah ha! found it” the turtle beamed at the comic book in his hands, after giving it a quick look he gave it to you “here, read this one. It's one of the best to begin with”

You took the comic, staring at the cover. Just like the one before, the pages had the title “Jupiter Jim” in bright yellow, a dark skin man standing heroic, dressed as an astronaut with a little funny looking red fox on his side. You started reading the first page “The colors are so pretty”, it was the first comment you made, colors always had been a focus point for you

Donnie was just staring at you while you kept reading in silence, nodding or adding a few “I know, right” to your occasional comments. The purple turtle started to order the comics, trying to decide which one to give you next, there were a few chapters missing, he put a piece of paper to remember what needed explanation from a previous loss episode. He then just stared at you some more, it was quite interesting for him how focus you could get at something

“Wow…” You proclaim, closing the comic book and looking at the distance for a few seconds, trying to process what you have just read, and then looking at the turtle “That was such a roller coaster of emotion, like- like the fights a-and…“ You spoke fast, as if you were trying to put all your thoughts in one word "It just so awesome!! I can't describe it, I don't know how I have been living without knowing this" You kicked your feet with pure joy

Donnie was flapping his hand while listening to you talking about your first impression of the characters, story, just the whole thing! he didn’t want to interrupt but at the same time he wanted to ask so many questions about your thoughts. He felt himself over the moon just listening to you talking about one of his favorite things, he could barely conceal his delight “I know! I told you, this is a history treasure” he shouted, not being able to regulate his voice.

“I feel so foolish for thinking of such an amazing creation as childish, I shall regret my words and promise to worship this great creation.” You hold the comic with both hands, putting it in the air as a sign of respect for a few seconds before snapping “Please, please!! show me some more” you got a little too close to the contrary

Donnie would have usually pull you back, but his joy was just enough for him to not care and unconsciously put you closer instead “Oh dear y/n we are just getting started, this is not even a fraction of how amazing Jupiter Jim is” he took another comic book, holding it with both hand with the cover facing you, it was quite close to your face so you couldn't actually read the title “This is one of my favorite, buy I would need to explain some things, since to my sadness the first episode of this saga is missing” He put his chair closer to yours, opening the first page, you also got closer to get a better look “First…” He started explaining “The previous episode ended with this big battle between Jupiter Jim and…” You both began to read the comic, laughing and sharing your thoughts of the story. Time seemed not to move forward as you both enjoyed your time together, just having a fun time in the middle of this chaotic world, which may never be the same again, but for that moment you both forgot about that.

#rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt donnie #rise donnie #rise donatello #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt x reader #rottmnt donnie x reader #rottmnt x y/n #rottmnt x you #rise donnie x yn #rise donnie fanfic #rise donnie x you #rise donnie x reader #one shot #canon x reader #canon x y/n

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zzzzzestforlife · 5 months

Text

day 8 of 30 // don't give it up 🤗

시작은 항상 너무 힘들어 😮‍💨 그래도 저는 시작할게요 💪 그리고 나서 저는 더 행벅게요 ☺️ 오늘 도, 제 책은 끝 읽어요!

(starting is always so hard 😮‍💨 but i'll start anyway 💪 and then i will be happier ☺️ today too, i finish reading my book!)

today's accomplishments 💯

🧠 aced Clinical Psych quiz

🧠 aced Cognitive Psych quiz

🥰 physiotherapy exercises (morning set)

🥰 rowing (while listening to a ~3m song)

🧠 read for Clinical Psych (focus time: 30m)

🙊 completed Japanese lesson (3x)

🙊 completed Chinese lesson (2x)

🙊 completed Korean lesson (2x)

🙊 listen to one ChinesePod episode

📚 read Mother-Daughter Murder Night (focus time: 1h)

🙊 continue watching Your Lie in April

🥰 physiotherapy exercises (evening set)

❤️ vocabulary + practice sentences under the cut if you're interested ☺️ have a lovely day! 🌷

Korean vocabulary 🙊

싱거 — bland

매력이 — charming

인기가 — popular (just remember that popular people are on inkigayo!)

신선한 — fresh (i thought i learned this and forgot but then i remembered i'd learned it in CHINESE not Korean 🙈)

제일 — best (finally i can stop saying 베스트 🙈) BUT it's also sometimes "most"

Example usage

세븐틴은 제일, 인기가, 매력이 가수입니다 — Seventeen are the most popular, charming singers 🙈

저는 가장 신선한 야채 찿다 — i find the freshest vegetables

한국은 쉬운 때때로 — Korean is easy sometimes

Japanese vocabulary 🙊

ようこそ — welcome

おなまえは — what's your name

はじめまして — nice to meet you (i don't know why there's a different one from よろしく...)

はやく — quick/hurry

などなど — et cetera

音楽 — music (learned and forgotten and re-learned 🙈)

し — death

ぼっく — i/me (casual probably)

から — "because" in some contexts but "from" in others??

花 — flower

Example usage

ようこそ! はじめまして! おなまえは? (welcome! nice to meet you! what's your name?)

ゆじん, はやく! (friend, hurry!)

音楽としとなどなど — music and death and et cetera (i don't know, lol)

Chinese vocabulary 🙊

我 keep forgetting 筷子是 “chopsticks”, 为什么? 我用筷子! 我喜欢吃的筷子! 现在记住?? (i use chopsticks! i like to eat with chopsticks! remember now??)

工作 — work (i kind of remember this but i keep thinking 中国 for some reason when i hear it?? yay, podcast is helping clarify!!)

职业 — occupation

做生意 — to do business (做 is do, 生 is produce, 意 is meaning)

作家 — writer (but 写 is write, 为什么??? 作 is compose, 家 can also mean expert besides home/house)

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waltwhitmansbeard · 9 months

Note

could you write another why haven’t you been eating with vaxleth but it’s Vax that’s the one who hasn’t eaten and keyleth finds

43. "Why haven't you been eating?" this is set in grow with the flow! tw: depression

Vax isn't as slick as he likes to think he is. Keyleth notices when the shadows in the apartment start to coalesce, when his eyes dim in the string lights she's hung to make their tiny studio feel less like a shoebox. His smile hasn't reach his eyes in days, and she's still learning the steps to this dance, when it's okay to push and when she needs to let him come to her. She hears him talk to his sister on the phone and wonders if Vex can hear it too, the dull edge in his voice, like the script he's reading from isn't particularly interesting. They've been together long enough that Keyleth doesn't take it personally anymore, except for the gnawing guilt in the pit of her stomach that she doesn't know the right thing to say to breathe life back into him.

So on one chilly autumn night, when the sky is black as a raven's feather and the moon is swollen and bright, Keyleth slides up behind him on the bed, hooks her chin over his shoulder, and plucks the phone he's been doom-scrolling on out of his hand. She ignore his "Hey!" of protest to point past him at the dinner left untouched on the bedspread beside his knee. "Why haven't you been eating?"

His whole body tenses, so she wraps her arms around his middle. He's skinnier, she can feel it. "Not hungry."

Sometimes, this conversation can be like pulling teeth. "For four days? Because that's how long it's been since I've seen you put anything in your mouth."

"Something in particular you'd like me to put in my mouth, Kiki?" But neither of them find his joke very funny.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?" There's a long silence as he picks at the stitching in the bedspread. "It's okay if there isn't. But...I miss you. When you go away like this. And even though I know you'll come back to me, I can't help but worry in the meantime."

His body sags back into hers, just a bit, but she holds him up. "It's just...the food." He shrugs. "It tastes like ash."

She presses a kiss to the crook of his neck. "Do you think...maybe getting some help could...help?"

"Hey." He peels one of her hands from his middle and plays with her fingers. "I'm fine, really. Just...in a funk."

"I mean, I'm no expert, but when I'm in a funk, I make Tiktoks exposing my plants for being drama queens. I don't go four days without eating because food tastes like ash." She squeezes him tighter. "I don't want your world to be bland and gray. You're the brightest person I know. You deserve that light, too."

Vax sniffs once. "Yeah. I don't know. I don't want Vex to worry."

Keyleth snorts. "Too late for that, dude. She texted me an hour ago to let me know she could get black market Zoloft if we needed it. I think Percy's physically blocking the door to stop her from charging across town right this very moment."

For the first time in over a week, Vax smiles a smile that doesn't send Keyleth's heart sinking into her stomach. "Yeah, she's pretty great." He turns to look at her, and there's a warmth in his eyes that nearly brings Keyleth to tears. "So are you."

"So are you." She kisses his forehead. "If you eat your dinner, I'll let you play with my hair."

He laughs, and hope swoops fast and bright through Keyleth's chest. "You'll let me play with your hair, anyway."

"Eat, or I'm blending it into a slurry and baby birding it to you until you don't look quite so much like death."

"Rude." But he obliges her, picking up the plate of leftover pasta and popping some into his mouth. He's going to be okay, she knows that, but she's gonna be here every step of the way until she's sure, until the winter passes and spring blooms in his eyes once again.

#ask #Anonymous #critical role #critical role fic #cr fic #vox machina #vox machina fic #vaxleth #vaxleth fic #my fic #critical role au #cr au #vox machina au #vaxleth au #grow with the flow au

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from-izzy · 4 months

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addressing my health and writing!!

fun fact: i'm rereading this post as careful as i can because i wrote ~90% of this post with my eyes closed!!

hi everyone!

the title of this post seems so serious but also not so serious at the same time...? 😅

anyways! this is just me updating a little bit of my health and how it's been affecting my writing.

on january 31st 2022, my psychologist wrote a letter to my school addressing that he 'has...identified that [I have]...Sensory Processing Disorder' (words quoted by the letter that was sent out). as far as i'm aware, i specifically have sensory modulation disorder.

i'll try to keep this concise and to the point. in terms of my spd in general, four of my five senses are hypersensitive with my top two being visual and hearing.

i recently just found out an important info by quite literally timing myself. i stayed in my room, lights out and in the dark for 20 mins. during that time, i did nothing but just stare at the ceiling (or i don't know, the spider that went past too) and jammed to some music. after, i started to write.

there is small time gap of 14 mins before i felt a twitch in my right eye. there is a small 1 min gap after when i started to get a headache. for me, i knew this before but i was afraid to admit it especially when i love writing so much but it's clear now that i am hypersensitive to lights.

that's why (at least, i personally feel like this) my writing quality has decreased drastically and writing errors are more apparent than ever. i get people to proofread for me but i'm really bad in asking for help so i usually just try to do it myself to the best of my abilities. the way i explain scenes have also been more boring and bland, and i want to tell you that if you think so too, you're most probably right! it frustrates me more than anything.

i'm trying to find ways to counter this or at least make the time gap bigger. i recently found out that writing in the dark, phone brightness down to the lowest helps and i was able to write for about ~40 mins before i started to get a headache. but unfortunately for my sleep hygiene, no technology should be in my room (i even moved my piano out of my room because of this) and so, i am trying to find another way.

another way i found is that closing my eyes works. fun fact: i'm rereading this post as careful as i can because i wrote ~90% of this post with my eyes closed!! yes it works but you can imagine how hard it can be.

if i can be fully honest, it's actually really hard for me to both read and write these days as well because there is no way i can make out the words without any form of light. when the headache strikes, it strikes and walking in a straight line can become difficult sometimes. the reality is that it's hard to write without reading and it sucks that i can't support anyone's work at the moment, especially when they have supported me so much (i'm so sorry to all the writers out there). there is nothing much i can do right now but to remember and learn the stories in my head as references when i write.

i'm still exploring for more ideas but if you have any ideas, do tell! i would love to try them out!

but i'm not going to stop writing! not when i have ideas to write and stories to share! it's just going to be slow and i'm planning to take it in a pace where i can handle. like i've mentioned before, i don't want to release stories that i'm not proud of.

thank you everyone for the support so far! 'double a decade' reached 100+ notes in less than a week! that's so crazy for me, thank you 😭💕

#🎙️ izzy wants to tell you...#sensory processing disorder #sensory processing issues #sensory processing sensitivity #writer stuff #writer things #writer problems #creative writing #writerscommunity #writeblr #writing community #🥹 izzy's ahhhh moments #🤭 a peak into izzy's thoughts

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justatinycollector · 6 months

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Thank you for the tag, @wyrd-syster!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Five! I'm a newbie.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

A humble 35,362.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I've only uploaded for The Rings of Power. A very, very, VERY long time ago, I started one crossover work between two other fandoms.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

#1: "swimming in the shallows"

#2: "if you're gonna play the game, you've got to learn to play it right"

#3: "crimson headache, aching blush"

#4: "exit light, enter night"

#5: "we could just kiss, like real people do"

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Try as I might, I can't seem to stop replying to virtually every comment I receive. It's a problem. I just...get so flattered that I want to thank people for spending any second of time reading words I strung together.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Angstiest? That's a tough call, considering the route my stories usually take. I'll say "exit light, enter night" because that one is by far the darkest.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I haven't written much with what you'd call a happy ending so far - my uploaded works tend to be on the darker side. But I'd say the happiest one would be "if you're gonna play the game, you've got to learn to play it right".

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've been fortunate enough to not receive any hateful comments on my work so far.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes! Not well, but yes. I usually write it with some darker elements thrown in. My beloved @thecoziestbean has told me that my smut perpetually leaves her in the following state:

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

My one and only (unfinished) crossover from LONG ago was a crossover. I am far too embarrassed to reveal what both fandoms were but...it was bad.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I have not. I think the AUs I write are either so specific that it's hard to lift detail or so general that I can't claim the details within them.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have not!

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No, but I have plans to co-write one with the lovely @bad-surprise.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Oh this is TOUGH. Not including Haladriel because it seems like a copout. I...really loved Dean/Lisa from Supernatural. Me and my doomed ships, I suppose.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

"crimson headache, aching blush" is one that I get so excited about but can't seem to nail down. The other one would be the musician AU that will most likely never see the light of day in full, though I have posted it in some promptfills on Twitter.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Sometimes, when I hone in on the right details, I can make those details come to life in a fairly compelling way. I also have been told that I can create an atmosphere of dread fairly well.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

There are so many I could name. I cannot, for the life of me, keep a concept alive for more than one chapter, so I've confined myself to one-shots. I linger too much on the wrong details frequently. My paragraphs aren't long enough; I separate my dialogue and supporting sentences too much. I reuse phrases and details and motifs like my work is my recycling bin. My dialogue is...boring? I think my work is fairly bland. I could go on.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Speaking just for my own writing, I'm not fluent in any other languages and therefore don't feel comfortable writing in a language other than English. In other works, I very much enjoy seeing other languages represented. I just don't feel that I currently have the ability to use other languages well in my own work. I hope that changes soon!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Okay, OKAY. I'll reveal ONE of the above fandoms. It was the Jumper fandom (originally a novel written by Stephen Gould, adapted into a 2008 film starring Hayden Christensen). You won't catch me dead revealing the other one, though.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

It's a tie between "swimming in the shallows" and "exit light, enter night". "swimming" is my first fic, and by far my best. Nothing I write ever seems to top it. It sings in all the right spots and just...works. "exit light" is not loved widely, but it is loved deeply, especially by me. I am so proud of it, of the ways that the translation from the original video game to a Haladriel AU worked so well and of the few, small details I was able to add that make it mine.

tagging @alicuntisms @bad-surprise @thecoziestbean @formerlyir @mostlydriedmango @sawdustandstardust @pursuitseternal and anyone else who wants to play! Please, understand how much I love reading these from every single author.

#hmm the fear of being perceived is real today

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miyagifangkai · 1 year

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Crossing Paths

Chapter 1: The Meeting

Summary: You work at a boring convenience store and just as the days start to run together and you get tired of your routine a new customer walks in, what will happen?

Word Count: 1.7k, I think???

Warnings: nothing really, maybe some curse words??

A/N: hi, this is the first chapter. I’m a little rusty on writing.. tbh if this flops I’m still gonna write and post idgaf lmao but again, thank you for taking time out of your day to read this. Much appreciated! Love you all! 💕

As the days seemed to pass the more they ran together, faces started to mesh into one, your work duties started to get done while you were on autopilot, you started greeting customers with a robotic tone in your voice, and your smile started to wear out. You felt like you were always here, alone. Even in a small convience store you still wouldn’t mind interaction; not with just customers but with someone or something exciting. Even your life outside of work seemed boring.

The hours were long when you worked. Always working open to close due to you being one out of two key holders at the store. You would work into the night closing around 9pm, grab take out, drive home, go inside, eat, watch an episode of your favorite show or movie, brush your teeth, drag your feet across the floor into your bedroom, and fall asleep.

Of course there were days off but lately those were very far and inbetween. Sometimes you didn’t mind being away from home too much because you were alone when you were there too. You wanted to pick up more shifts and your manager, who held the other set of keys, didn’t mind that.

But here you were on a bland Tuesday evening around 5pm getting prepared for a slight rush because of the adults getting off of work. You sat in one of the most uncomfortable stools you could ever think of to relax for a bit and hopefully to cool down because you had gotten overheated from the afternoon sun blazing through the windows above the cash register. You were chewing on a piece of gum while reading through a magazine about the big drama surrounding celebrities or how they are “just like you,” you scoff to yourself muttering “yeah, sure they are,” as you roll your eyes.

You hear the little bell on the door chime as you see a light blonde haired man walk in. Your eyes dart up at him and you instinctively straighten your shoulders and get ready to put on your fake smile and customer service voice before you realize he doesn’t even look your way. He makes his way to the back of the store near the coolers as you silently wait upon his return.

You look back down at your magazine and absentmindedly tap your fingers on the counter as you read.

You’re interrupted by the clattering of cans being roughly sat down beside your magazine. You look back up and are met with dark blue eyes and a sad expression on his face. He didn’t look like he took care of himself that greatly but still one of the cleanest looking customers you’ve seen in awhile. You give him a small smile, “This all?”

He looks at you and nods.

You ring up the beer cans and tell him the price and he starts digging for cash in his pocket.

“Sorry,” he quietly apologizes.

You smile, “Oh, no worries. I get paid by the hour, so.”

He chuckles lightly and hands you the cash.

“Thank you, need a receipt?”

“No thanks,” he grabs the cans and quickly makes his exit before you can tell him to have a good evening.

You mumble, “What a weirdo,” and go back to your reading.

That was the first interaction you had with him and it surely wouldn’t be last. As he started to come in more often. Not every day. But every other day, here and there; and he would come in at the same time every time. Close to 5pm before rush would hit.

You wondered about him on the days he didn’t come in, hell, you could say you almost missed him sometimes. He was something. Somebody you could possibly get to know or truly, he wasn’t that bad to look at.

Your interactions didn’t have enough words for any type of brain stimulation but every time he walked in you could feel your heartbeat start to get faster.

He always bought the usual, beer.

You even got the chance to ask him how he was and he would answer with, “Alright, I guess. You?”

That’s when you would always give him your catchphrase, “Oh, you know, livin’ the dream!”

He always laughed when you said it giving you a small smile.

After that your conversations started to become a little longer. Even though, you two avoided formalities with each other. Never getting his name or his occupation but you didn’t think that you wanted to know. You wanted to keep him a mystery. Usually reality really bites and you decided to keep dreaming.

A few weeks later he came in with another boy, a highschooler, you didn’t know him as you weren’t in high school yourself but you still wondered. He was a lot more outgoing than the blonde, you almost laughed at those two, how opposite. You thought that maybe the mysterious blonde man was his teacher or a family friend. They both came up to the counter with chips, soda; and of course, beer.

You look at the blonde and smile, “This all?”

The blonde nods, “Yeah, that’s it.”

You give a small nod and smile at the kid, “How’s school going?”

“Sucks. School’s school,” he shrugs his shoulders.

“I get that,” you answer, “your total is $14.87.”

The blonde hands you a $20 and you type into the register and as you’re getting out the change you hear the kid ask, “Why don’t you wear a name tag?”

You look down at your shirt and sigh not believing that you had forgotten to wear a name tag that day.

“Oh? I usually do. I forgot today!” You facepalm.

The brunette boy asks, “What’s your name then?”

“Y/N, what’s yours?”

“Miguel! This is Johnny.”

You look up at Johnny, “Johnny. Nice. Well, nice to meet you both. Miguel and Johnny,” you smile.

Johnny quickly looks at the ground trying to hide his evergrowing blush.

Miguel seems to notice something going on between you and Johnny and he smirks, “Have you heard about the karate dojo opening up here?”

“What? No. I haven’t! Who’s teaching?”

Miguel points at Johnny excitedly, “Yours truly!”

You look back up at Johnny, “Oh, karate huh? Well, that’s good. I’m glad there’s something going there. It’s been vacant for a while now.”

Johnny pipes in, “Yeah, I wasn’t sure about opening a dojo but Miguel here really talked me into it.”

“Well, that’s cool. How do you two know each other?” You ask.

“We’re neighbors and Johnny helped me get out of a sticky situation with some bullies one day using his totally awesome karate moves.”

You see Johnny start to give Miguel an intense look and it seems like he didn’t like Miguel sharing that information with you so you stay silent and don’t ask questions.

“Yeah. Well, we better get going. Got a dojo to set up,” Johnny places his hand on Miguel’s back to get him to start moving.

“Oh, yeah, totally. Well, good luck with everything guys! I’ll see ya later!” You wave.

“See ya!” Miguel waves back.

Another week or two passes by and you see Johnny again, this time without Miguel.

Johnny quickly glances at you and gives you a kind nod and you reciprocate with a smile. He makes his way into the back to get his usual. You wanted to get to know him more, for some reason there was something about him that drew you to him.

You slowly walk back towards the snack area to see if you could get a good look at him. As you stand there practically staring a hole through the back of him without realizing it he confidently says, “It’s rude to stare, you know?”

Your eyes widen and you quickly say, “Oh, I’m so sorry.. I didn’t mean to be rude!”

He turns around with a faint blush and almost a smirk, “Need anything?”

You sigh, “Uh, no. I just wanted to make sure you were finding everything alright,” nice save.

Johnny chuckles, “Right. Well, I have everything I need,” and he raises up the beer cans and starts walking towards the front.

You take a second to breathe and take in all your embarrassment and then start to follow him. You just wanted to melt into the floor so you could never see him again.

You make your way behind the counter and scan the cans, “So, Johnny,” you wanted to make conversation with him. Besides, you’d seen him here so many times in the past and you are just now figuring out what his name was so you couldn’t help but let curiosity kill the cat.

“Yeah?”

“I was just wondering, like, I’ve seen you here a lot. What do you do? You know, for a living?”

Johnny looks at you with a piercing gaze but quickly softens, “Teach karate.”

You almost face palm. You knew that. Miguel had told you that not too long ago. You couldn’t believe you just asked him that like a big idiot.

You chuckle at your stupidity, “Oh! Yeah! I knew that!”

Johnny cracks a small smile, “Yeah, dojo is down that way. You should swing by some time if you’re interested,” his smile falls into a smirk and he looks away from you at the floor with red cheeks. You couldn’t help but take in his handsome features.

That’s when it hit you swing by? Was he hitting on you? No way. He couldn’t be. He was so out of your league. Or was he?

“I definitely will one day! I wouldn’t mind learning some self defense since I work nights too.”

“You work nights? By yourself?”

“Well, kinda. We close at 9 but still that’s pretty late around these parts sometimes.”

“Yeah, hey, I don’t mind to stay after class to walk you to your car if you need me to.”

Every bit of you wanted him to. You didn’t even know him barely but you felt like you’ve known him forever.

“Johnny, you don’t have to do that. Really, that’s late. I don’t want to keep you out.”

“No, really I don’t mind.”

“Okay.”

You see his eyes lighten up a bit more, “Yeah?”

You nod, “Yeah, sure. I close up by 9.”

“Alright, I’ll be outside the dojo waiting for you,” he slowly steps away.

“Uh, wait!” You raise your hand slightly to stop him, “uh, you’re not planning on kidnapping me or something? You’re not like an axe murderer or something?”

Johnny laughs, “No. I don’t plan on murdering you, Y/N.”

Johnny steps back up to counter and reaches out his hand for you to shake, “Johnny Lawrence.”

You shake his hand, “Y/N L/N.”

“Nice to meet you, officially.”

You smile, “Nice to meet you too.”

Johnny let’s go of your hand, “Alright, I’ll see ya later!”

“See ya!”

Johnny makes his exit and you sit down on your uncomfortable stool and take a deep breath. Holy shit, he was hitting on you.

#cobra kai #johnny lawrence #miguel diaz #william zabka #johnny lawrence x reader #daniel larusso #cobra kai imagine #hawk moskowitz #demetri cobra kai #eli moskowitz #robby keene #karate kid

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