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#riot living up to his name
fruit-salad-ship · 1 month
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Ranger au doodles, post-grad.
They will never know peace.
I am in a real funk art wise, so any encouragement, ideas, or anything at all might kick me to do something. Feel free to dump asks.
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fictionadventurer · 5 months
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Guide to PBS Kids writers:
This is an early episode of a quality animated show and is one of the most hysterical things I've ever seen on children's television = Joe Fallon
This is an early episode of a quality animated show and is very funny = Ken Scarborough
This episode has strong, vivid and realistic female characters = Kathy Waugh
This is an episode of an animated show that has undergone a notable quality drop where the characters get lessons preached at them and seem to exist only in a very narrow urban upper-middle-class worldview = Peter K. Hirsch
This is an episode of that show that has undergone a notable quality drop but the characters are believable and I'm actually laughing at several really good jokes = Ken Scarborough
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attractthecrows · 9 months
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amusing myself by imagining how much pellinore warthrop would HATE any potential bastard of his
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horrorartsworld · 4 months
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Hi! I’ve read quite a lot of your works and I’ve got to say, you’re a great writer, like oh my god!
I was wondering if you could write a one shot of Alastor with a female reader wife who’s like Beetlejuice? Appearance wise (but more feminine), personality wise and power wise as well. Maybe he hadn’t seen her full power before due to no one chanting her name, but during extermination day, as a last resort, someone does and she kind of just goes full on “beast mode” to protect her husband? What would Alastor’s reaction be? Would he like it?
If you can’t do it, that’s alright! I hope you have a great day! ^^
( ≧ᗜ≦)₊˚⊹♡ OMG NONNIE!! you do not understand how excited i was to write this for you hence beetjuice being one of my favorite movies hehe and thank you so much i hope you enjoy this one !!
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ghost with the most !
alastor/beetlejuice f!reader
warnings: slight angst, mentions of blood and massacre, some fluff towards the end!!
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“Wait…sooo you’re telling me chuckles over there has a wife?!” Angel Dust asks his voice raising in disbelief towards the chipper blond in front of him who just so happened to spring this unbelievable information on him.
“Oh sure!” Mimzy raved, with a sort of twinkle in her eye that she only got when she started to gossip. “Under all that creepy and murderous exterior there’s a big ol’ sap! Can’t say I blame him ether — his wife’s a real firecracker! Me and her use to get into all kinds of trouble when we were living!”
She sighs reminiscent on her past looking like she was lost in thought before Angel erupts in bewilderment once more, “There’s no fucking way! I can’t believe i’ve never heard about this…”
Then he suddenly glares at Husk who was unamused by the whole thing. “What?” He huffs with an eyebrow raised, using a towel to wipe off the innards of a dirty glass.
“You knew about this didn’t you…” He eyes him with the worst stink eye making Husk snort, “Listen…I did but that women is bad news and if anyone bothers to say her name three times it’s over…” The cat then places the glass delicately amongst the others before Mimzy gestures for a drink earning a scowl out of him, grabbing the glass once more. “Besides why wouldn’t i know…”
Angel Dust rolls his eyes, resting his cheeks in a pair of his hands taking all this new information in, then sitting up straight again. “Wait? why three times..”
Mimzy giggles delightfully like a toddler clapping her hands seeing Husk place a full glass in front of her. “It’s like her way of a contract honey, to make sure you truly need her when she’s summoned and she’s not all that bad Huskie she’s just a little eccentric and bizarre is all, but truly a fun gal!”
Husk lets out an annoyed huff turning his back to her as she downs her drink in one big gulp with a small hiccup following. “Besides no one’s seen her in years, bless her damned soul…” Mimzy goes back to being reminiscent once more, but this time with a frown forming on her face which was unusual for her.
“Anyways tits, are ya joining us tomorrow? Gonna be a riot.”Angel Dust attempts at changing the subject though he still wanted to know more, seeming that his question somewhat spooked her she started readying herself to leave.
“No, no, no sweetheart! As much as I loooove a good brawl, this one is just not my cup of tea, kick ass though, choa!” And like that the tiny little blonde broad was gone out the door.
Leaving Angel to stew on all this information he just consumed, his eyes then wandering on the grouch in front of him with a smirk playing on his face.
“Wanna fuck before we die?”
“No.”
“Worth a shot.”
⁺˚⋆。°✩₊🪲
On Extermination Day it wasn’t looking so hot for the Hazbin crew.
Each and everyone getting hit down one by one like a domino effect without really too much that they could do about it with their fire power seeming to not be enough like they thought.
Angel Dust looks along the battle field, spotting most of his friends injured or worse and none other than Alastor actually getting his ass kicked. Causing the spider insane amounts of uneasiness, when suddenly an idea clicks.
“Y/n…..,” Angel Dust hesitates thinking back to what Husk said about you and how this could possibly turn out. “Ah fuck it….Y/n! Y/n! Y/n!” He gives in shouting it as loud as he possibly could and within an instant the sky above the hotel swirled in green, causing many sinners and angels to look into the direction of it completely in awe of what it could be.
Alastor holding his chest as the gash across it starts to burn profusely, he notices everyone had stopped for some odd reason making him look in the direction of what had caught everyone’s attention, and if that man’s smile wasn’t permanently on his face already you would’ve saw the biggest grin known to man.
Suddenly a loud noise of a playful accordion rips through the air in a circus theme. ( https://youtu.be/gwsR5gOKK1U?feature=shared sounds something like this if your curious.) “Attention Kmart shoppers!” Your sweet yet sinister voice echoes throughout everyone’s ears with a menacing giggle following. “CLEAN UP ON ISLE SEVEN!! ,” Everyone looks around confused without noticing your form appearing in the middle of a bunch of the Exterminators, Angel Dust finally getting a good look at you causing his jaw to drop. Green hair flowed down your shoulders, a white and black striped dress hugged your body as two large mallets adorned both hands with a mischievous grin that could put Alastor’s to shame, then spinning both mallets around before giving quick blows to each and every dumbfounded exterminator that you saw, leaving an absolute massacre in your wake. Chest heaving with golden blood on your face, when you suddenly notice them, quickly wiping the blood with your striped sleeve and made your way over.
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(dress ref!!)
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Your green cloud forms behind a unsuspecting Adam with a pointed black nail coming out to tap his shoulder. He looks around aimlessly before facing Alastor once more, and then suddenly a large golf club appears with you on the other end of it with a golfers cap on your head. “FOUR!” Is shouted from your lips as you suddenly swing it with much force sending the douche bag flying lord knows where.
You hold your hand over your eyes pretending you saw where he was going, but then quickly snapped out of it to tend to your lover. “Always know how to make an entrance my dear,” Alastor says rather proud of his wife for being able to keep her cool all while kicking ass. “Oh you know I can’t help myself when there’s a crowd!” You dust yourself off before you do your best to help him up seeing his gash slowly dissipating into nothingness leaving just the rip in his nice dress shirt making you frown. “Awww Al, he ruined my favorite shirt!” You then loose track of what you were upset about and start playing with the hole delicately skimming your fingers across his skin, making him shiver as you made it seem like a mouth making ‘nom, nom,nom’ noises until Alastor cleared his throat.
“Sorry babe..” He chuckles down at you while then patting your head, before you wrap your arm around him taking him back to his friends.
“That’s quite alright…now how about we do some catching up, i want to hear all about your adventures,” He says looking down at you feeling how much he really missed this, missed you, clinging to you close like he never wanted to let you go again while you two walked.
Your eyes light up, bouncing up and down giddily next to him before jabbering on the rest of the way about things like almost getting eaten by a sand worm and practically ruining a recently deceased married couples start on the after life.
And of course Alastor was happy to hear all of it from his precious wife who he adorned and loved very much…
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isitcorrect · 11 months
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Over on Twitter, "community notes" are "factchecking" claims that drag queens and trans women were at Stonewall by invoking the words of one Fred Sargeant, a Stonewall veteran turned cop turned TERF - not using that as a generic descriptor, but an accurate one, as his bio has "I Stand With JK" in it.
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Fred Sargeant has, in recent years, pivoted hard to erasure of trans people and drag queens from the history of Stonewall, in the name of proving that it was entirely cis lesbians and cis gay men responsible, and when anyone pushes back, he drops the phrase that in his view terminates all debate: he was there and you were not, so you've got to trust him.
One problem, though. By his own admission, Fred Sargeant was not in the Stonewall Inn that night, and only came upon the event after police entered the bar.
Yes, his story has always been that he was at a dinner party when it began, and observed Stonewall when he walked by and saw people and cops gathered outside the bar. As he said at the time:
The kids felt that some of the other kids were being kept inside and being beaten up by the police. I don't know whether it really happened that way or not, but the rumor spread.
Authoritative stuff.
Sources do agree Stormé DeLarverie, alone or part of a group of butch lesbians, scuffled with police; they disagree on if that was the singular cause of it escalating into a riot or one of several causes. Stonewall is...a incredibly fuzzy event we'll never have a perfectly objective record of, for many, many reasons, and we accepted that, until a guy who was at a dinner party instead of in the bar decided to appoint himself the One Authoritative Voice on what really happened at Stonewall that night, and frame anyone who disagrees with him as a liar who just can't accept the truth.
Stonewall probably wasn't exclusively about trans people, but it sure as hell wasn't not at all about trans people either.
...again, this guy lived through Stonewall and then became a cop, and he wants himself to be the sole acceptable elder for the entire gay community.
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bluerosefox · 2 months
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GHOSTS WITH HEARTBEATS
When Jason had been going to Gotham Academy, he had (for a good reputation for the media and to help him catch up on his penmanship, remember he had been on the streets and dropped out of school before getting picked up by Bruce for a while) signed up for a penpal project for 'less privileged people' to write to.
(Although Jason was annoyed the penpal project stayed within the states and only selected a middle of nowhere town, he knew the Richie Rich Elites would never subjugate their 'Heirs' to actual kids in need of learning how to read and write)
But Jason didn't mind his penpal.
Danny Fenton was a riot to talk, err write to in all honestly.
From his dry punny humor (and boy can he give even Dick a run for his money in the pun department but hey using some of them actually got Dick to warm up to him a few missions ago) and death jokes so many death jokes, to his nerdy love for space Jason enjoyed writing to Danny.
Even the short stories he would write about a ghost kid protecting a small town from other ghosts was interesting to read. He really liked the different kinds of ghosts there could be. Granted some seemed very OP like that Clockwork dude.
Jason liked writing to Danny, and even after the penpal project was over they had plans to keep sending letters, maybe even exchange numbers soon...
But then he died by the hands of the Joker.
The letters leaving Wayne Manor may had decreased but the letters being sent never did or at least until a few years ago.
Then Jason somehow returned to the land of the living.
Got taken by the LoA, tossed in the green waters and turned into their Pit Raged weapon for a while before leaving them behind and setting out for his revenge against the Joker and to force B's hand.
And becoming a Crime Boss for a while too. Can't forget that.
Point being with all this going on, the old warm memories of exchanging letters with Danny Fenton was pushed into the back of his mind and forgotten about for a while.
It isn't until one afternoon at Wayne Manor that while roughhousing with Dick, who had Jason in a brotherly headlock as they walked down a hall to one of the sitting rooms, that while Jason had slipped out of Dick's hold had stumbled into a hallway desk that had a few things on the top of it, one of the things being a small box that tumbled off when Jason hit it.
The box lid opened and out of it spilled out a good number of letters.
"Shiii-p, dang it Dick!" Jason said when he looked at the mess he accidentally made and stopped himself from swearing, the place might be named Wayne Manor but everyone knew this was Alfie's domain and no swearing was a rule within his halls.
Dick only laughed and teased only in a way a sibling can do "Hey not my fault your as big as a tank Jaybird! We should get you some caution signals if you keep bumping into things!"
Jason flipped him his favorite finger, thankfully Alfred only knew when they swore thus it did not summon him, and bent down to the letters.
His hands froze when he recognized the hand writing and the address it was sent from.
"From: Danny Fent Nightingale
Amity Park, IL"
To: Jason Todd-Wayne
Gotham City, NJ.
Wayne Manor"
And when Jason opened the letter. He really wasn't expecting what was written inside.
"Jason.
I'm finally leaving Amity Park. I can't be there anymore, not after everything. I'm too tired, and emotionally hurt. Everything is just to much. And I can't keep doing this to myself. My parents still can’t understand there is nothing ‘wrong’ with me or why I refuse to let them take care of Ellie, I refuse to let her live the way Jazz and I did, Jazz has to much on her plate already with her own life and college but she’s been hounding me to reach out to mom and dad, Sam refuses to listen to me when I tell her I want to be more than ‘Phantom’ in Amity Park, and Tucker is so busy trying to get into a good college and job we barely have time to talk nowadays. And don’t get me started on Vlad, that fruitloop’s been breathing down my neck since Ellie’s deaging.
Despite how much of a hellhole you like to call it, I think Gotham might be my, no mine and Ellie’s best bet of living some kind of life, especially now since the whole deaging she had to go through, she needs an ectoplasm rich city as well and since she has no actual papers because she was my clone and I remember you saying Gotham has people who can create new identities and-
I’m rambling again, to letter you again. I really need to stop it.
I can’t keep pretending you’re going to read these.
I know you’ll never read these. You’re gone. I can’t even find you in the Realms no matter where I look.
I’m sorry. For using you as, well, a way to vent my life for last couple of years. I shouldn’t had done it but it helped me.
Believing my friend was still alive and getting my letters I mean.
Again I’m sorry.
This will be my last letter to your ghost, pun unintended.
Goodbye Jason. Wish us luck in your city.
-Danny Fen-Nightingale...."
The sent date on the letter was roughly eight years ago.
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nomsfaultau · 2 months
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Dark sbi where Tommy accidentally kidnaps Philza, not knowing he’s a crime lord. And he swears it was an accident! He just, you know, panicked. Tommy and Tubbo were just minding their own business slapping graffiti on a building (practicing their art skills, you see) when a cop started screeching at them, apparently not an appreciator of the fine arts. And since Mrs. Innit would KILL him if he got arrested, Tommy panics and takes a hostage, shouting at the cop not to take a step further or he’ll kill the random civilian he’s ducked behind so he can’t get shot.
Meanwhile Philza isn’t entirely paying attention, and realizes there’s suddenly a small child sheltering behind him from a cop. He gives the cop the nastiest look imaginable, which causes them to back off enough that Tommy thinks his plan is working. Once the negotiations start Philza is baffled by who would have the gall to kidnap him, and so poorly at that. Frankly it’s an umbrage to face the work of an amateur.
Well, till the abductor asks his name. “…do you not know who I am.?”
Tommy squints at the guy. His suit looks kinda fancy? Is it better or worse for him if he managed to randomly capture some Wall Street schmuck? “Hell no,” he hisses. “And I don’t care. I’m a dangerous guy alright? You don’t know what I’ll do to you.”
Philza’s laugh causes the cop to advance, wagering the situation isn’t intense. But because Tubbo’s ‘Yes And’ game is a force to be reckoned with, he casually pulls out a nerf gun (painted to look real for a prank on Ranboo) and trains it on the cop. Philza is positively delighted as he realizes just how amateur his abductors are. Oh this will be a riot to watch.
With more bluffing than Tommy knew he had in him, promising the hostage 20 bucks if he pretended to go along with it, the pure manic chaos bleeding from Tubbo’s eyes and ample gun waving, and creative use of spray paint in the eyes of the chasing cops, Tommy and Tubbo somehow manage to book it. For some reason the hostage keeps up with them instead of escaping. Huh. Can you develop Stockholm syndrome that fast? Tommy would ask, but he’s panting from sprinting. And as they live in an unjust world, hostage guy isn’t even breaking a sweat despite the three piece suit.
“You’re not going to get far on foot,” Philza murmurs. As corrupt and useless as the cops are for most things in this city, he doesn’t imagine there’d actually be that much fuss over a random man being kidnapped, but he wonders what they’ll do if spooked a little more. It’s been amusing thus far. The boys bicker, then elect to force him to drive as neither have licenses. They don’t ask him to drive to their homes, instead some secondary location. Smart, albeit Philza will definitely know both addresses within the hour.
While Tommy is busy ‘threatening’ Philza about the consequences of not getting them there, Tubbo just leans over from a bag of chips he’s munching on and offers them to Phil. Tommy rounds on him, less for showing exploitable kindness to the hostage and more for eating the Doritos that were meant to be his. Philza almost chides them for revealing each other’s names, but decides it might just be easier to hand them notes at the end of this. So far they aren’t getting a passing grade in abduction. But he has to admit it’s far more entertaining than the ‘business’ meeting he was planning to attend.
(Techno, meanwhile, hasn’t heard from Philza and is going BALLISTIC trying to figure out who kidnapped him. From the police report Phil just kinda went along with it, and looked terrified after a private exchange with the abductor, which has to mean the threat is ungodly to convince the Angel of Death to submit. Techno’s about to have a panic attack imagining the unthinkable horrors happening to his best friend, and is only holding it off by doing atrocities about it. This is the THIRD secret criminal organization he’s ripped apart in the last two hours and PHILZA ISNT HERE EITHER!?)
Philza has decided he likes his kidnappers. They’re not experienced in the slightest, but they make up for it with bravado, determination, and a certain lack of rationality that is necessary in the line of business Philza is in. Yes. They’ll do nicely if given a little guidance.
It’s half an hour before either of them notice Philza is driving aimlessly and they don’t recognize the city around them at all. “Hm? Next time I don’t recommend you give the hostage control of the vehicle. I could have immediately driven to the police station.”
Tommy frowns, almost more nervous at the implication the obvious blackmail would go unused. “…why didn’t you?”
“There’s no love lost between the cops and I. And even more importantly, you amuse me. I like your…potential.” He grins at the soft click of Tommy covertly trying the handle and finding the car doors locked. “Getting out at this speed is almost always fatal, Tommy.”
Tubbo lifts the muzzle of the fake gun towards him. “Let us go right. now.”
Philza leans over, ruffling Tubbo’s hair. The teen gulps at the glimpse of the holster Philza’s jacket was hiding, sharing a wide eyed look with Tommy. “I’m not exactly scared of foam bullets, mate.” He chuckles lowly at the tension freezing both of them. “Relax. You’ll be home by dinner. After you went through all the effort of kidnapping me to avoid trouble with your parents, I don’t intend to ruin it. I like you two; you have spunk I don’t see often. After all, it takes a lot of guts to kidnap the leader of the Syndicate.”
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holylulusworld · 15 days
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Indifferent (1)
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Summary: Your father wanted a bond between you and the Barnes Empire. No matter what.
Pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Wife!Reader
Warnings: arranged marriage, angst, mentions of impotence, arguments, mafia au, hand around throat (no choking/non-sexual), strong reader, mentions of cheating/attempted cheating?
Indifferent Masterlist
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He glares at you from across the dining table. His upper lip curls when you dig into the too-dry chicken his new cook prepared for you and your not-so-lovely husband.
“I’m not satisfied—” he leaves open what crawled up his ass today, but you know, it’s not the food. James Buchanan Barnes is bad at hiding he despises you when you are alone.
“You are not satisfied?” You chuckle dryly and drop the fork onto the table with a loud clank. “Why don’t you ask me how I feel?” You get up, chair scarping loudly over the expensive parquet.
His eyes darken when you dare to walk toward the end of the huge table. “What is it that bugs you, love?” He spats the last word as if it burned his tongue.
“You!” You throw your hands up. “This marriage is a farce. If I could, I’d be out and about in the blink of an eye. Everything is better than living with an indifferent, moody, and impotent man!”
“IMPOTENT?” Bucky rises from his seat. He squares his jaw and clenches his metal fist. For a second, you’re scared to the bones, but you brush it off.
“YES! If not I wouldn’t ride a pillow every night,” you spat in his face. “Just you know, I’m going to look for a lover first thing today. And I won’t be subtle about it. Everyone knows by now that this marriage is a bad joke. I refuse to be the butt of the joke, though.”
“You won’t ruin the union of our empires over selfish reasons.” You gasp when you end up pressed into the wall, Bucky’s metal hand wrapped around your throat. He leans closer to brush his nose over your cheek. “Even though, I don’t think you’ll find a lover anytime soon. Who would go for you if they can have some other girl? I’d go for someone else too if only I could…”
He drops his hand from your throat and smirks. Bucky steps away, flashes you a smile, and storms out of the dining room.
You stand there, shell-shocked at his outburst as you rub your throat. His words hurt like hell. You drop your eyes to look down at your body. It’s been a while since you felt this kind of hurt. 
Maybe it’s you. Maybe Bucky isn’t interested in being with you because of your looks.
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“Hurry the fuck up,” Bucky barks outside your shared bedroom. “Woman, I don’t have all day. My parents want to have lunch with the two of us. Just put a smile on and come here.”
You walk out of the bedroom, an armful of your clothes. “I think it’s for the best to not keep the act up. We are married, but this doesn’t mean I must spend time with your father.”
Bucky watches you walk toward the west wing of the mansion. He follows you hot on your heels, all the while throwing questions at you. 
“Where are you going? What are you up to? Y/N, answer me!”
“I’ll stay at the west wing from now on. Annie will help me bring my belongings to the west wing. You can do whatever you want to at your wing. Just stay out of my sight.”
You walk away, leaving Bucky stunned and angry. He grits his teeth and calls you names as you slam the heavy door parting the west wing from the entrance hall shut.
“What the fuck!” He mutters under his breath. So far, you suffered in silence ignoring his unbearable behavior, and the openly shown hatred towards you and your marriage. Now you riot and he doesn’t handle it well.
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“Where’s your lovely wife?” George cocks his head as his son sits down on their table. “I thought you said she’ll be here too.”
“She’s not feeling well today,” Bucky lies straight into his father’s face. What else can he do? How shall he explain that the bond your parents forced upon the both of you lies in ruins after not even six months into marriage?
“Ah, she finally snapped,” Winnifred remarks while studying the menu. She smiles to herself, while her husband and Bucky turn their heads toward her. “Good for her. I was rooting for Y/N.”
She slowly closes the menu and lies it down on the table. Winnifred doesn’t give away more. She orders her food and a glass of white wine. Your mother-in-law is in the mood to celebrate.
It wasn’t a lie. She was rooting for you to take matters into your own hands. It took you longer than she liked but now, she’ll lean back and watch her son grovel.
“What do you mean?” Bucky and George say in unison. They are surprised at Winnifred’s answer.
“You forced that lovely woman into marriage and didn’t even try to make her feel welcome. Did you at least give her orgasms?” She chuckles. Bucky’s face turns red, he swallows thickly, and uncomfortably shifts in his seat. “I see. The poor woman suffers in silence.” She sighs now. “Alright, I’ll give her the number of our gardener. He’s got a son who will gladly help Y/N take care of her secret garden.”
“What?” George is at a loss for words while his son tries to forget that his mother was asking him about your non-existent sex life. “Mother!”
“What? I’m a red-blooded woman, just like Y/N. If you don’t find satisfaction with your husband, you must look elsewhere. Men do it all the time.” She shrugs before taking a sip of her white wine. “Y/N is a beautiful woman in her best years. Her sexual drive must be over the top after six months of not getting any attention.”
“Winni, stop saying things like that in public,” George snarls. “You are making a scene.”
“I’m not making a scene,” Winnifred bites back. “I try to make our son see that his wife will turn toward someone else in no time if he doesn’t take care of her every whim soon. You’ll weaken our bond, and this will shatter both of our empires. Is that what you want, son?”
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Is that what you want? His mother’s words echoed in his mind the whole way back home. Of course, he doesn’t want to weaken your empires. 
The only purpose of your marriage was to strengthen not only his father’s empire but your father’s empire too.
If you turn toward someone else, an enemy maybe to get back at Bucky, the empires could crumble and fall only because he’s too stubborn to let you inside his life.
Bucky enters the mansion, a grim expression coloring his features. If only you weren’t so infuriating and stubborn he could’ve easily settled for you.
But no.
Y/N Y/L/N is the most annoying and bratty woman he ever met.
Sometimes Bucky believes you’re riling him up on purpose.
“Wait—” he stops in his tracks. Bucky furrows his brows as he tries to recall all of your little fights. “Is she doing it on purpose? Maybe she wants me to lose control and just…”
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“Where are you going?” Bucky follows you out of the mansion. “Y/N stop being a brat. I asked you a question and I expect you to answer my damn question!”
“Out,” you glance over your shoulder at Bucky. “Your mother sent me something interesting and now, I want to find out if it’s for me.”
“She did what?” Bucky looks like he’s about to have a heart attack. He pants heavily and clutches his fists to his sides. “You won’t leave the ground for the time being.”
You huff. “Try me.”
He closes the distance between the two of you with three long steps to grab your arm. “Don’t tempt me to throw you over my shoulder! You’ll go back inside and listen to what I have to say.”
You laugh in his face. “Make me!”
Part 2
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Tags in reblog.
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sometimesanalice · 1 year
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What’s In a Name?
Summary: Bradley really loves the way you say his name. At the grocery store. At the bar. In his bed.
Warnings: fuff, and so much smut. Minors DNI
Length: 9K
Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw X Female Reader
(This is a one-shot for my ‘Like I Can’ series. You don’t need to read it first, but you might want to. It’s pretty cute! You can check it out here!)
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Bradley loved hearing you say his name. 
He’d gone almost two years without hearing it. Back when he was ‘Rooster’ or ‘Bradshaw’ to you. Back when you weren’t sure how you would fit into the life he had built in San Diego when you had moved there for a promotion. Now he made it a priority to show you just how seamlessly your lives fit together, to remind you just how right you were for each other.
There were times when he still couldn’t believe that he was able to have you so entirely. You went from being just his closest childhood friend to being his everything. And now that he had you there was nothing he liked more than the sound of his name coming from your lips. 
He loved hearing it every chance he could. 
He’d never come so hard has he had the first time he’d heard you chanting his name over and over again as he’d fucked you in his bed. Your hair had been a riot on his pillow, your lips swollen from the attention he’d given them with his own. He’d just barely gotten you over the edge before he’d followed, so overwhelmed by your sweet voice so needy and breathy in his ear.
BradleyBradleyBradley
He had even changed his contact information in your phone from ‘Rooster’ to ‘Bradley’ one lazy Sunday afternoon when you had been dozing on his chest, adding a little sparkly heart next to it for good measure. In general, he wasn’t much of an emoji user, but he thought you might find it cute when you discovered it. He was very pleased with himself months later when he realized you’d never changed it back, pink sparkly heart and all.
He loved hearing you say his name at the grocery store. 
He had gone off to find his favorite brand of protein powder, the store had recently rearranged their health food section and he could never remember where it was stocked. He didn’t want to drag you around on the scavenger hunt, especially when he knew you’d rather be doing anything else than grocery shopping.
Once he had it, he’d tried a few different aisles before finding you standing near the baking things and spices, he would have recognized your curves in those jeans anywhere.
You were chatting away with an elderly woman like you were a pair of old friends. It didn’t surprise him, since you’d always been the type that strangers had gravitated towards, your warm energy apparent to who crossed paths with you.
Walking up to you, he put the powder in the cart with the items you had accumulated while he had been wandering the same three aisles over and over again before he found what he was looking for near the bottom shelf.
“Bradley!” you greeted turning towards him beaming, your smile pure sunshine, before cheerily spinning back to the older woman, “See, I knew he’d find us eventually.”
“And he’s just as handsome as you said,” your new friend replied, giving him the once over.
“Yes, he is. Very handsome and very tall,” you told her with a teasing lilt in your tone, glancing back over your shoulder to send him a wink.
He’d happily be objectified by anyone you wanted, including elderly women wearing fuzzy purple sweaters, just as long as it meant you were bragging about him to them. That they knew he was yours, and you were his.
“How can me and my six-foot-two-inch self be of assistance to you ladies?” he asked, putting on his most winning smile. It couldn’t be said that he wouldn’t commit to a bit when the opportunity was presented.
“Can you reach Ruth a couple of those containers of Hungarian paprika, please?” you asked him while pointing to the red and green tins on the top shelf.
He was glad you had waited for him. They were so pushed back that there’s no way you would have been able to reach them on your own without climbing on the bottom shelf for a boost. 
Safety first and all that, but also, he wouldn’t have wanted anyone to see the way your shirt would have ridden up your back. The dimples at the base of your spine were for his eyes only.
“Of course, I am at your service,” he pressed a quick kiss to your temple before stepping around the cart to grab the spice for the older woman. 
“Oh, and then maybe one for us too, Bradley. I’ve never tried making Hungarian Goulash before. You’ve made it sound so good, that now I think I have to.”
“If you want to make it, mine is the number one reviewed recipe for the dish on AllRecipes,” Ruth boasted, there was no hiding the pride in her voice. 
He hands Ruth the tins he had grabbed, and passes the other one to you to add to the collection in the shopping cart. 
“But what I left out is that I always use this specific brand of paprika, and that I make mine with half pork and half beef. I save that tidbit for friends and family, I couldn’t just give all of my secrets away to the internet people.” 
That had you laughing, “So sneaky, I love it! Thank you for sharing your secrets with us. Sounds like we know what we’re having for dinner tonight.” 
You were already opening pulling the recipe up on your phone for later. 
“I’m looking forward to it, especially since we know the tricks of the trade now.”
His eyes catch on the overflowing hand basket resting near the older woman’s worn Birkenstock mules. It looked heavy, almost like she didn’t originally plan on getting as many things as she ended up with.
“Can I carry that for you? Or if you have more shopping to do, I would be happy to go and get a cart for you,” he asks, gesturing to her overloaded basket.
“Oh no, those were the last things on my list,” Ruth replies, waving off his offer, “My youngest daughter is having her 50th birthday and the whole family is having a get together. I thought doubling my recipe would be fine, but I decided last minute to triple it.” 
She bends down to reach for it, but he beats her to it. His mom raised him right.
“No, ma’am, I insist.” He’s pretty sure he catches you checking out his ass when he stands back up, “I’ll be right back, sweet girl. Stay out of trouble.” 
He holds out his other arm for Ruth to take so he can escort her to the front of the store to pay.
“I don’t find trouble, it always seems to find me,” you joked.
“I believe that,” chimes Ruth.
He turns back to get a look at you, and sees you bringing your hand up to your forehead to mimic a full swoon.
He just smiles and shakes his head at you and your antics. Such a brat.
He helps Ruth at the check-out unloading the basket onto the conveyer belt, and then carries her packed grocery bags to her car getting them settled in her trunk. 
Once they’ve parted ways, he heads back inside to find you.
You’re standing in front of the cooler with all the dips and fresh salsas, your head cocked to the side as you deliberate your choices.
What he also notices as he makes his way to you is that you’ve caught the attention of another man, one who should be paying more attention to his bagged lettuce instead of eyeing his girlfriend. 
Sneaking up behind you, he wraps his arms around your middle lifting you up off the ground.
“Bradley! Oh my god, seriously?” He can’t help but laugh at how startled you are, he’s pretty sure if you were wearing pearls you’d be clutching them right now. 
“Here I thought you were a gentleman, helping sweet Ruth with her groceries. It’s rude to sneak up on innocent and unsuspecting women,” you protest trying to twist out of his arms once he has set you back down.
“Ah, don’t be like that,” he settles his hands on your hips pulling you back to his chest, letting his fingers slide through your belt loops, before lowering his voice, “Unsuspecting, maybe. But innocent? There wasn’t anything innocent the blowjob you gave me in the Bronco outside the Hard Deck last night.”
He knows the shiver that goes through your body isn’t from the cold case you are both standing in front of.
Looking over to his left, he sees the man who was checking you out putting down the bag of spinach in his hands. And he is hit with a feeling of smug satisfaction watching as the guy quickly wheels his empty cart out of the section completely.
“No getting handsy by the hummus, Bradley,” you tut, still set on giving him the cold shoulder, but the way you lean back against him gives you away, “Should we get that lemon beet kind again?” 
“Whatever you want, kid,” he murmured against your neck. “Plus, the word on the street is that you think I’m handsome, so that’s got to count for something.”
When you pull away from him this time, he lets you go. Getting a glimpse of the skin above the top of your jeans as you reach up to grab the square container of hummus.
You set it in the cart looking back at him as you toss your hair over your shoulder, before primly stating, “Oh, and Bradley, if you’re going to quote me I do believe I said you were very handsome.” 
And with that final word, you push off with the cart meandering to towards the fruit section, the sensual sway of your hips he knows is just for him.
He especially loved the way your voice sounded when you’d just woken up, when his name was one of the first words out of your mouth to start a new day.
There was nothing Bradley liked better than the nights you spent together in the same bed. It didn’t matter if it was his place or yours, just as long as he was able to wake up to find you warm and tucked away under his arm. 
“G’morning Bradley,” you’d whisper, voice soft and sleepy, a little raspy from disuse, as you turned to nestle closer burrowing your face in his neck.  He knew you liked a gentle wake up, and he was more than happy to trail his fingers along your back until you woke up a bit more. 
He was always up before you, his internal alarm clock permanently altered from his time in the Navy. For as much as you claimed to be a morning person, you were always the one snoozing yours in favor for spending a few more minutes in bed. It wasn’t something he’d ever expected to learn about you, and he liked being the one who got to share those intimately domestic moments with you.
The only surefire way to get you out of bed and moving on those mornings was the suggestion of hot coffee-- that or the promise of his mouth. 
He loved the way you said his name when you were surprised. 
When he’d gone to that furniture store you liked, his only plans were to find a new larger dresser for his bedroom. He had claimed he needed more space for his stuff, but really, he wanted there to be more room for you to keep your things at his place.
The home stylist at the store not only helped him pick out a new dresser he thought you’d approve of, but also convinced him to also purchase the matching king-sized canopy bed frame and set of nightstands. 
He was told the mood was “cozy mid-century chic”, whatever that meant.
Bradley knows he runs hot, you’ve told him enough times that he’s like a furnace. So when the stylist showed him the cloudlike and breathable comforter along with the 800-thread count white cotton sheets, he had them add that to his collection too.
You still wouldn’t move in with him, but he was working on it. He knew he’d reel you in soon enough. And if it took a payment plan, so be it. 
Although, he could only blame himself for the new lamps and giant rug he also purchased. He’d gotten a little swept up in the salesperson’s enthusiasm. 
Hopefully that guy got commission, he deserved every dollar. 
It had hurt a bit when he swiped his credit card, but it was worth it to hear the way you said his name when you saw it all for the first time after it had been delivered and assembled.
“Oh my god, Bradley!” you laughed, “I thought you said you were just getting a new dresser. Did you buy the whole store?” 
“What can I say? The salesperson was very good at his job, sweet girl,” he was trying to not let his leg bounce as he waited for you to say more. A little nervous now that he’d gone overboard and missed the mark, “Do you like it?”
“It’s absolutely perfect, Bradley,” you gushed as you slowly made your way around the room taking it all in. “It’s warm, it’s classic, it’s cozy. It feels like you. You’re going to have a hard time getting me to leave now, I love it in here.”
That was all he wanted.
He felt all the tension leave his body, grinning as he watched you sit down on the bed running your hand over the soft deep green duvet. It had become his favorite color the second he’d seen you in that green dress the night at the seaside restaurant when he’d told you how he felt about you.
“So, do you want to help me break it in?” he asked, pushing off from where he had been leaning against the doorframe and sauntered towards you. 
The way you slowly reclined back on the bed, your lips turned up in a mischievous smile was an answer in itself. 
He loved the sound of you saying his name at the Hard Deck.
Your voice was so familiar to him that he could pick it out anywhere. He was so attuned to the way you said his name that he could be in a conversation with someone in the noisy bar, but his ears would perk up if you said his name in a passing comment. 
It was like he was hearing his friends talk with one ear, while the other was always listening for you.
He could be with Mav catching up and chatting about the new plane he was working on, until:
“Yeah, I could use another one, let me see if Bradley needs one really quick and then I’ll go up with you.”
And then he would find himself standing next to you at the bar. 
He could be playing around of nine-ball with Hangman, until:
“No, you’re kidding me! There’s no way you caught Coyote doing that, has Bradley heard this one before? Oh my god, you have to tell him.”
And then he would find himself abandoning his cue on the pool table. 
“What the fuck, Bradshaw? You can’t just quit because I’m kicking your ass,” Jake would shout at him as he made his way towards you.
After all, you’d said his name and now he was curious.
He could be at the jukebox trying to find something better to put on than whatever terrible song Fanboy had picked, until:
“Oh! Bradley knows how to play that one, let’s see if we can bribe him to go perform it. I doubt we’ll have to try very hard, he’s such a little show off.”
And then he would find himself seated at the piano.
To everyone else he was ‘Rooster’, ‘Bradshaw’, ‘Lieutenant’, and soon to be ‘Lieutenant Commander’. 
To you he was Bradley. 
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Seeing Bradley seated at the piano was a normal sight for you.
Since being permanently stationed in San Diego, he’d had all of the things from his storage locker shipped over, including his Dad’s old upright. He liked to play in the evening to decompress after his day and you liked to watch.
There was something about the way his large fingers moved over the keys so gracefully that was always so mesmerizing to you.
You still remembered how embarrassed he would get all those times when your moms would beg him to put on an impromptu piano recital. Usually fueled by a couple too many glasses of Cabernet Sauvignon, you realized later on. 
Your mom and Carole had definitely been the “Wine Moms” at the baseball and tennis games they’d sat through in support of you and Bradley.
He would get a little sulky in the way that all self-conscious teens got, but he could never hold out for very long before pulling out the wooden piano bench. Bradley wasn’t one to purposefully disappoint his mom, their relationship special in the way that only a single parent and an only child could understand.
Once he realized it was a good way to get noticed by the girls in high school, he’d been quick to change his tune. And now it was clear he reveled the attention it got him when he sat down and started tapping out a carefree riff before launching into a song, all preening posturing and smug smiles.
You were usually right next to Bradley when he put on a show, an arm wrapped around his shoulder, always one to want a front row seat to see him in action.
Tonight the bar was a bit more packed than usual. It took a little longer to move around, and a little longer for Penny to make your drink since you had opted for something slightly more complicated than a beer.
Slowly, but surely, you wove your way through the crowd. Careful to avoid any stray elbows to avoid jostling your full drink as you made your way back to your friends where they were gathered around the ancient upright. You were nearly there when a burly man stepped around you, giving you a clear view of Bradley playing. 
And you were stopped short by the picture in front of you.
The performance he was currently putting on at the Hard Deck was different than anything he did at his own home. His leg bouncing in tempo as he shimmied perched on the piano bench, like it’s a struggle for him to be contained to one spot.
He was captivating in the way that he commanded the room. 
Maybe it was the way the way the muscles of his forearms were flexing as his fingers were precisely flying over the discolored keys.
Maybe it was the way the light sheen of sweat was collecting in the hollow of his collarbone.
Or maybe it was the way the veins were standing out against his neck, the way the thick tendon that ran along his throat had you transfixed as he threw his head back to sing at the top of his lungs. 
His sunglasses were sliding down his nose as his head bobbed between glancing down at his hands and scanning the room. He smiled when his eyes found yours over the top of his aviators. Your hand tightened around the glass in your hand, the condensation dripping down your wrist as you stood there and watched. 
You weren’t sure if it was your imagination or the tequila you’d been sipping on all night, but it seemed like he was working the keys of the piano a little harder, a little faster as he held your gaze. 
And then his tongue was slipping out. Just a bit, and just for you.
Thankfully no one could hear the way your breath hitched in your throat over the sound of everyone in the bar singing along. You’d be embarrassed if you weren’t so turned on. 
The intensity of Bradley’s heated gaze, the way his body was moving, the way you wanted to crawl in his lap and lick the taut line of his neck and taste the salt of his skin right there in front of everyone.
You probably looked as desperate as you were feeling, because his easygoing smile turned more knowing every second your eyes stayed locked.  
“I’ll be right back,” you said to no one in particular as you abandoned your spicy margarita on the nearest surface to make your escape.
You felt like you were about to vibrate out of your skin.
It was easier to slipping away to the bathroom than had been trying to reach Bradley in front of the stage, needing a moment to yourself out of his heady orbit.
Locking the door behind you, you lean against the worn wood that was littered with stickers that had been collected and brought back from around the world. You try breathing in and out a few times, the way you’ve learned to do at your expensive yoga classes, in an attempt to slow down the rapid pounding in your chest. Actively trying to not think about the way he looked at you.
There was no question in your mind that you suffered from an incurable Bradley kink. Now that you could let yourself revel in all sorts of unfriendly thoughts about him, everything he did was a turn on for you.
You had a sneaking suspicion that he might have one too. His eyes always a got a bit more heated, and his hands would grip you a little tighter when you said it. 
You knew that if you were to slip your fingers past the waistband of the dainty lace underwear you had just bought that you would find yourself wet. 
And for a moment, you’re tempted to do just that. To let your fingers skim up your thigh, along the scalloped edge of the panties you’d bought specifically with Bradley in mind, to think of him as you slide your fingers inside of yourself. 
You’re feeling so high-strung that you know it wouldn’t take long to come. It wouldn’t be the first time you would have used the bathroom at the Hard Deck to get off.
Your hand is halfway under your sundress, when you hear the chanting:
Roo-ster! Roo-ster! Roo-ster!
In your mind’s eye, you can picture him standing behind the piano doing his version of a touchdown dance. 
You’ve teased him about it before, calling him a “slutty little songbird”, which he didn’t deny. He thrives off the attention, and you can’t say you mind watching him do that sexy little shimmy he is so fond of. 
You also don’t mind helping him find other ways to work off the post-performance high.
Knowing that he will probably be looking for you now that he’s done, you smooth down the skirt of your dress with shaky hands and make your way to the sink.
Standing in front of the dingy mirror, you can see just how much a wreck your appearance actually is. Your cheeks look warm, your lips are slightly swollen from Penny’s special spicy margarita mix, and your eyes have that certain wild gleam in them that only Bradley brings out in you.
You turn the cold tap on, and stick your wrists under the running water. Hoping the cool water on your pulse points will help ease the heat that is spreading under your skin.
While the chanting has stopped now, you can still hear the lively sounds of the packed bar. Figuring it’s alright to leave the safe confines of the tiny bathroom, you turn off the water and dry your hands, determined to not let anyone see just how riled up you were.
You’re barely five steps outside of the bathroom, when a strong arm wraps around your waist.
“Hey, kid.”
And just like that your heart is racing out of control again. His woodsy smell paired with the faint hit of sweat has your brain going fuzzy. 
“You doin’ ok?” he rasps against the shell of your ear. He has you pulled against his warm, broad chest and you can feel the echoes of his question reverberate throughout your whole body.
You pull out of his grasp to turn and face him, taking a small step backwards towards the wall.
“Uh-huh, yeah. Everything is fine,” you ramble, nodding your head as you try to avoid looking in his honey brown eyes.
“You sure about that?” he asks taking a step towards you, which has you retreating another one back. “Thought I should check on you since you disappeared there for a bit.”
“Just you know,” you trail off briefly glancing at him and gesturing pathetically towards the bathroom like that explains your clearly unusual behavior. 
“Mm-hmm, sure,” he allows, his head tilting to the side as he observes you. 
You know the exact moment when he realizes what’s going on by the way his cheek twitches as he tries to control the wolfish smile he is fighting back. And you’re suddenly feeling very much like his prey when he presses forward again. This time when you step back you feel the wall against your back as he crowds into your space.
“We should probably go back,” you stutter out when he cages you in with one hand above your head.
“Maybe,” he muses, tracing his thumb along your lower lip, “You sure you don’t want to tell me what’s got you so ruffled?”
The way he is looking at you, the way he feels against you, it’s all too much.
“Bradley.” 
You don’t know what you were trying to sound like when you said his name, but there’s no missing the neediness in your voice.
“Yeah, I thought so,” he murmurs, his voice rough and low. He takes your hand in his, guiding you to his zipper, letting you feel him through his jeans. “You got me all worked up too, sweet girl.” 
The sound you make is lands somewhere between a wheeze and a whimper.
“C’mon, let’s get out of here.”
He doesn’t wait for a response before he has you leading the way up to the bar, using your body to hide his hard on as he pays. Not even bothering to wave goodbye to your group of friends as he hustles you to the Bronco. 
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He definitely broke the speed limit and a couple minor traffic laws on the drive back trying to get you home to his place.
You had looked so flushed when he had been pounding away at the keys of the upright at the Hard Deck, and you had dashed away abandoning your freshly made drink. He might have sped up the tempo to wrap it up faster so that he could check on you, worried for a moment that you might have caught a bug or food poisoning or something. 
That was until he caught you outside of the bathroom, and saw just how flustered you’d been and he knew.
It took everything in him not to push you back into the tiny bathroom and have his way with you right then and there. He was hit with an image bending you over the sink, and showing you just how good you looked coming around his cock.
However, a hot and dirty quickie at the Hard Deck wouldn’t have been enough for him.
He knew exactly how he wanted you: flustered, flushed, and thoroughly fucked.
So yeah, he floored the gas pedal needing to feel your body under his as soon as possible.  And it didn’t hurt that it probably cleared out some of the engine build up in the Bronco along the way either. 
He pressed you against the door the second you’d gotten inside, letting you rock your hips against his thigh as he sucked along the curve of your collarbone. Your hands coming up to tug at the curls at the top of his head.
“U-upstairs,” you gasp when he grazes his teeth along the swell of your breast.
You didn’t need to tell him twice. 
He lifts you up, and your legs wrap around him immediately. It had taken all of his will power not to slip his hands up your frilly dress at the Hard Deck. He loved any chance to he got to get his hands on your ass.
He almost misses the first step going up the stairs when you drag your hot mouth along his neck.
“Wait, wait,” you pant in his ear, “Put me down.” 
“It’s fine, I got you,” he promises as he tightens his grip on you.
You pull away and shake your head at him, “I don’t want either of us to end up in the Emergency Room for a sex related accident. Could you imagine? Jake would never let us live it down, and Nat would be worse.”
“It’d be worth it though,” he winks at you.
“You say that now, until you’re stuck in a neck brace unable to fly or have sex,” you admonish jokingly, stroking the side of his throat with the scars he earned from that night at Jason Cameron’s homecoming party.
“Yeah, but you could still ride me. The way I see it, it’s a win-win either way,” he chuckles at the exasperated way you roll your eyes.
“You’re handsome, but I don’t think even you could pull off the color of those hospital gowns,” you quip with a quick peck to his lips, “Now, hands off the goods.”
Giving your ass one more squeeze, he lets you slide down his body. He may not have his hands on you anymore, but it doesn’t stop him from admiring your figure as you bound up the stairs in front of him. 
He stops short at the threshold of his bedroom at the sight of you pulling your dress over your head. Of all your soft skin on display for him.
There were times he still couldn’t believe he got to have you like this.
How did he think it could have ever just been a friendship with you?
He liked how comfortable you were in this space with him, liked how perfectly your things fit in with his. 
He liked knowing that one of the pillows on the bed smelled like you.
He liked knowing that if he went in the bathroom he would find your expensive shampoo and conditioner in there next to his. 
He liked knowing that if he opened the drawer on one of the nightstands that he would find your lip balm, your lavender lotion, a vibrator from your place that had found a home here, and a notebook and pen in case you needed to remember to do something because you didn’t like having your phone in bed.
What he currently liked most about his bedroom was the way your dress was decorating the floor, and the way you were kneeling on his bed like a vision.
You were wearing a matching pale pink lace set he’d never seen before. Your skin was peeking through the floral embroidery of the sheer mesh in an all too enticing way.
You were his sweet girl.
“Come here,” you beckon, inching closer to the edge of the wooden canopy bed. 
He’s not one to deny you, he’d willingly go wherever you wanted. He saunters in towards you slowly, putting on a bit of a show for you as he comes to stand before you.
“I like this, it’s pretty,” he hums as he runs his knuckles slowly over the edge of the embroidered cups, enjoying the way you lean further into him. 
Cupping your jaw, he pulls you forward for a lingering kiss. Being this close to you, the smell of your musky floral perfume is intensifying thumping of his pulse. 
Your hands slide under his Hawaiian print shirt, helping to ease it off his body and then tossing it somewhere near your dress. You ruck the tank he has underneath up his chest and he reaches down to pull it over his head as your hands run over the ridges of his abs.
His body has been humming for yours since the bar. The hurried encounter at the door barely managed to take any of the edge off, and he was still just as starved for you as he had been when he saw you holding that drink looking at him like he was something to be devoured. 
His left hand moves from where it’s been settled on the flare of your hip and up your back to the clasp of your pretty bra.
He’s been letting you take the lead, but you’re not nearly naked enough for him. 
“Hands to yourself,” you mutter as you work to get his belt undone, “I’m trying to get you naked you here.”
Part of him wants to take his time with you, to take you apart slowly and see what new sounds he can uncover. The other part of him wants to have you holding onto that rich espresso colored headboard while he shows you just how much he appreciates you wearing this little set just for him.
“You like my hands,” he murmurs against your neck. He is quick to unhook the clasp of your bra with one hand, easing it down your arms and flinging it behind him.
Yet another offering to his bedroom floor. 
And then he is trailing his fingers down your soft stomach, dipping them under the band of your matching panties. 
He groans when he discovers you’re already wet for him. He finds your clit, and teases you there making gentle figure-eights with his finger, “Got yourself so worked up you couldn’t even stick around for the end of the damn song, huh?”
You’re quick to abandon your crusade against his favorite pair of jeans, leaving him unbuckled and half unzipped, as you circle your arms around his neck to pull him closer to you.
“God, your fingers feel so much better than mine,” you sigh against his mouth as he licks his lips before bringing them back to yours.
Your full lips soften under his demanding ones, the sensual slide of your lips against his has him desperate for more.
He slips his tongue in your mouth taking advantage of your gasp as his circles against you turn from teasing to purposeful. The kiss turning messy with need. With want. 
“I know another part of my body that you like just as much,” he murmurs, as he palms your ass.
Your hand starts moving down his chest, down his stomach. 
“Nuh-uh,” he tsks, catching your tricky hand before it has a chance to reach his cock, bringing it back up to rest on his shoulder. 
“I want to touch you,” you whisper against the spot below his ear that you know drives him wild. 
“I’m getting you off right now,” he says firmly as he speeds up his motions against your clit.
It doesn’t take long before he has you panting against his mouth, your hips rocking against his fingers. 
“That’s it,” he coaxes, “Let me give you what you want.” 
He knows from the sweet whimpers you’re making that you’re close, he breaks away from your kiss to hold your half-lidded gaze as you come for him.
He will never get tired of watching you fall apart. 
He will never get tired of seeing you satisfied and spread across his bed. 
Giving you a moment to catch your breath, he shucks off his jeans and his briefs, releasing a small groan as his cock springs free. He’s been hard for you since he cornered you by the bathroom at the bar. Sending you a lazy-half smile at the way your eyes take him in standing there above you as he slowly pumps himself. 
He knows he looks good, it’s literally his job to keep his body in peak condition. 
But you make him feel good.
No one knows him better than you, makes him laugh harder than you, makes him feel as important as you do. Your appreciative gaze of his body is just another bonus to the many ways you make him feel good about himself.
He climbs on the bed, settling between the cradle of your open thighs.
“You gonna tell me what got you so keyed up, sweet girl?” he asks in-between scattering kisses across your cheeks.
“That’s classified,” you retort breathlessly as you wrap your legs around him. 
“Is it now?” he grinned, kissing along the delicate line of your jaw. He’ll let you keep your secret for now, he had other more pressing questions he wanted answers to, “Did you touch yourself when you ran off to the bathroom?” 
“No,” you whine, as he pulls your nipple into his mouth, laving it with his tongue.
“Did you think about it? Think about me?” 
He wanted to know. He needed to know that he drove you just as crazy as you did him. 
“Yes,” you gasped out in confession when he moves to your other breast, giving it the same attention, “I’m always thinking about you.”
Good.
“Already know how you feel about my fingers,” he rasps as he kisses down your stomach, making sure to place one on the little tattoo near your hipbone. “Should I let you have my mouth too, sweet girl?”
“Yes,” you breathe working your hands into the curls at the top of his head, “Please.”
“Yeah, I think so too,” he agrees mouthing at the last little bit of lace still on your body.
He pulls off your pretty pink panties and throws them somewhere behind him, probably landing on that overpriced dresser he bought for you.
He loved that he was the one who got to see you like this. Your hair was a mess from his hands, you pupils were blown wide, and your flushed chest rising and falling with rapid shallow breaths.
“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” he says reverently before licking a firm stripe parting you open.
It’s not long before his mouth is meticulously working between your thighs, his tongue gliding over your clit, one of your legs thrown over his shoulder. 
He’s sliding his finger into you and then another, making room in your body, determined to pull a second orgasm from you.
You’re so wet for him, so soft for him, so sweet for him.
He knows what you like. He’s studied your body just as thoroughly he did the aircraft manuals he was given, if not more so.
“More,” you moan, your hips rolling from the stimulation, “I need more.”
Pulling away from you with one more broad lick of his tongue, he leans his head against the thigh that’s thrown over his shoulder, watching your face as he pushes another finger into you. The way you’re pressing your heel into the muscles of his back has him fighting the urge to grind himself into the bed. 
“You look so good like this,” he praises, taking in the way you writhe against the three fingers he has buried deep in you, as he squeezes you hip with his other hand.
He’s seen a lot of unforgettable sights from the cockpit of his plane, but nothing will ever compete with the way you look as you chase your release. Your eyes fighting to say open as you watch him watching you.
“Oh my god,” you exhale when he hits that spot inside of you, your leg starting to tremble with the need, “Please, I’m so close.” 
Using his fingers and mouth in tandem, he works you with same pressure, the same pace. He feels you clenching around his fingers a few moments later, your back arching in pleasure as you fly apart for him. 
Teasing his lips and mustache along the sensitive skin at the crease of your thigh, as you come down from your high, before kissing his way back up your body. Your greedy hands reaching out for him, pulling him to your mouth. He feeds you his tongue, letting you taste yourself on him.
The way you’re whimpering beneath him is making him feel out of control.
“I want you inside me.”
Wrapping his large hand around his cock, he drags it through your folds few times before he finally lines himself up at your center. 
And then he’s finally pushing into you, savoring the way you cling to him as he gives you a moment to adjust to his size.
“Rooster,” you say with a sigh against his lips. 
He starts to move when your hips start to shift seeking more friction. And then he’s rocking into you with the smooth, deep strokes that never fail to make your toes curl. Once, twice, three times.
“What’d you say?” he asks, as he slows the pace down. 
Your hands are in his hair, and you tug on the strands when he pulls away to look at you. Your lips are swollen, but he knows that look in your eye.  He can already can guess what you’re going to respond with before your lips have even formed the word.
“R-ooster.” 
The word comes out a stutter, as he roughly thrusts into you again. 
He doesn’t know why he’s bothered asking, he should have known that you were going to make him work for the one thing he wants to hear.
“Say my name.”
He was so gone for you, he wants you riled up and feeling the same way as him. He wants his neighbors to hear you saying his name. Wants them to know that he’s the one making you feel so good.
“Lieutenant,” you taunt, not bother trying to hide the self-satisfied on your face.
If he wasn’t going to get what he wanted then neither were you. 
He pulls out of you completely, flipping you over on the forest green duvet. His hand coming down on your ass, a quick sharp slap.
The sting of it has you gasping into your forearms pillowed underneath your head, and your cunt fluttering around nothing.
Leaning forward, he kisses down the length of your spine admiring the way the goosebumps pebble on your skin now.
“Say my name,” he coaxes again.
He tugs your hips up and licks deeply into you once before pulling away. Watching smugly on his knees at the way your hips tilt up after him, your legs spreading further apart as you offer more of yourself to him.
“Bradshaw,” you counter.
Closer, but still not what he wants to hear. 
His open hand connects on the other side of your perfect ass, earning him a sweet moan from you.
Grasping his cock to slide it through your wetness, he stops just short of where he knows you want to feel it the most. 
He wants you dazed. He wants you desperate for him.
You’ve always been the type to take a mile when you’re given an inch. And he intends to only let you have exactly eight inches tonight.
“You want this cock?” he rasps.
He knows he’s got you where he wants you when you don’t reply with another bratty remark, only desperately nodding ‘yes’ into the mattress.
“Look at me,” he demands. 
You’re slow to lift your head up to look back at him, your eyes are a little glazed over as you take him in. You look as wrecked as he feels. He can only imagine what he looks like through your eyes. He can feel the sweat collecting at his temples, can feel the flush that’s working its way down his neck to his chest.
“You know what I wanna hear, kid.”
That makes you whine. 
“Oh, you wanna be my sweet girl now, huh?” he asks, squeezing your hips.
He wants to taste that lower lip, the one that’s pouting prettily at him as you nod for him again. Even now as you writhe against him you’re still trying to get your own way, still trying to get him to break first.
“Well, you know what to do,” he feels like barely hanging on now, “Say. My. Name.” 
He punctuates each word with the rock of his hips, his cock just grazing your clit. Enough to keep you on edge, but not enough to give you the stimulation that you want.
“Bradley!” you cry out.
He’s inside of you before you’ve even gotten the second syllable out. 
Groaning your name, he throws his head back at the sensation of finally being surrounded by you again.
“Good girl. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” he tries to ask teasingly, but it comes out more a rumble than anything else. “My sweet girl.”
Your pussy squeezes him harder at the praise as you roll your hips up more to better accept his body in yours. He loved the view he had, loved seeing how wet you were for him, loved seeing just how well he filled you, loved seeing you stretched around him.
He leaned forward a bit, brushing back your hair off your face to see you better. The change in angle making you gasp as you fisted the material beneath you.
“Say it again,” he prompts, smoothing a hand down your back, “I wanna hear you say it again.”
His name. 
The only thing he wanted running through your mind. 
His name. 
The only thing he wants coming from your mouth, other than the sweet whimpers and moans he is pulling from you. 
“Bradley,” you indulge, his name sounding something between a plead and a purr.
Without disrupting the pace he’s set, he nudges your knees further apart. Wrapping an arm around your middle to pull you up against his chest, needing to be closer to you. 
“Go on, let them hear who is making you feel this good,” he grunts roughly in your ear.
“Brad-ley,” the staccato of his name punctuated by his steady thrusts against you. Your hand digging into his hip.
Interlocking his fingers with yours, he lifts your arm to hook it around the back of his neck, holding you to him there. Turning your head, you greedily mouth at the column of his throat, frenzied and wet.
You were it for him, there was no question about it. And he would happily prove to you in all the ways he could think of that he was it for you too. There’s nothing he wants more than to make you feel good. To please you. To give you the best you’ve ever had. 
His other hand slides up from where he had been squeezing your waist to get his hand on your breast. He loves how perfectly you fit in his hand.
He meets you for a kiss, sloppy and perfect, messy and deep. 
He can’t control the sounds of satisfaction escaping him as you move together, feeding off of your sighs and moans. Your hands are grabbing onto whatever part of him is in reach: his hair, his thigh, his arm. 
Enjoying the drag of his cock as he moves in you, he lets himself get lost in the sensation of being connected with you like this. The room filled with the sounds of labored breathing, of your bodies coming together, of you saying his name over and over again.
You’re starting to tremble in his arms, he’s pretty sure your legs would have given out by now if it were for the way he was holding you against him. Your nails biting into the back of his neck, as he slowly drags a hand down your body to where you’re connected.
“I love this,” you murmur into the base of this throat. 
He doesn’t know if you realized you said it out loud, doesn’t know if you meant to say it out loud, but he loves hearing it all the same.
“God, you feel so good,” he can feel the sensation building at the base of his spine, “You’re perfect. So fucking perfect.”
The way his circles his fingers against your clit has you gasping into his waiting mouth. 
“Bradley, please.” 
He’d give you anything. He’d give you everything.
“C’mon then,” he insisted hoarsely, pressing his forehead against the side of your temple, “Say it for me one more time, sweet girl.” 
He speeds up his fingers, set on ending you. Working your body with the precision that he handles his sixty-five million dollar aircraft. Determined to give you what you’re so sweetly asking for.
And it’s his name you gasp as you come undone.
Your is head thrown back against his shoulder as you spasm around his cock, your hips rolling as you are lost to the pleasure of your orgasm. He kisses your neck and lightens the pressure of his fingers on your clit, wanting to extend it out for you as much as possible, enjoying the tiny pulsing aftershocks he is drawing from you. 
It’s only when he feels you go boneless that he starts to lose his own composure. His breathing going completely ragged and hips snapping erratically against you as he chases his own climax.
A few more powerful strokes later he follows you coming hard with a groan, burying his face in your neck as he spills in you.
Somehow, he manages to get you both sprawled out horizontal on the bed without him completely crushing you.
“Holy shit,” he curses flinging an arm over his eyes, his other reaching out to touch whatever part of you he can find. There’s nothing but the sound of the blood rushing in his ears as he tries to catch his breath.
Time gets away from him as he runs his hand up and down your back. It could have been a few minutes or an hour when he feels the bed move, and you slipping out of his grasp as you get up to use the bathroom. 
“No, stay,” he attempts to pull you back to him, feeling the need to have you close again as he tries to settle back into his body. You’re seemingly recovering much quicker than he is at the moment.
“I won’t even be gone two minutes, you can time me.” He can hear the soft affection in your voice. 
“Don’t think I won’t,” he grouses halfheartedly lifting up the arm with his watch on. He manages to raise his head up in time to get a glimpse of your naked figure as you close the door behind you.
True to your word, you are back one minute and forty-seven seconds later. He opens his arms to you as you climb back on his bed and drape yourself half over him.
Much better.
He feels you shift yourself up a few moments later to press a kiss to the scar on his shoulder. 
“I just want to try something,” you murmur before making your way along the bend of his collarbone. 
Up the side of his neck.
He feels his pulse start to kick up again as you work your way up the line of his jaw. He tilts his head away to give you more access to his skin there, basking in the feel of your lips on his body.
“Bradley,” you whisper lightly against the shell of his ear.
The guttural groan that rips through him surprises him. He feels his cock twitch against his thigh, a visceral reaction to you.
And then you’re giggling.
“I knew it,” you get out between fits of laughter, “You’ve got a name kink.”
Your face pure joy at your discovery. He’ll happily let you tease him for the rest of his life as long as you keep looking at him like that.
“Nah, I got a you kink,” he says as he hauls you on top of him.
“I’m already planning on letting you have your way with me again tonight, Bradley,” you proudly declare, propping yourself up on his chest, smiling down at him. “You don’t have to try so hard, I’m a sure thing.” 
If he wasn’t already gone for you, the cheeky wink you sent him would have sealed the deal.
He feels himself already starting to get hard again, one of the perks of being a part of the 1%.
“Sweet girl, you’re gonna be the end of me,” he chuckles, running his hands up your back, “And I remember someone once telling me that they give as good as they get, so I won’t be dialing it in anytime soon.”
And then he is pulling you down for a kiss.
Later that night when you’re riding him so good, you get him chanting your name. 
Over, and over, and over again. 
A couple hours later, he watches you slip away into slumber, satisfied and spent beneath the fluffy comforter on the bed.  
His bed. Your bed. Their bed.
It was just as much yours as it was his, regardless of whether you were officially living together yet or not. He bought it for you, after all.
Even on the occasional nights you spent apart, you were still everywhere. 
He liked the plants you had picked to fill out the empty spaces in the room. He liked that the right side of the bed was your side of the bed. That those were your books on the nightstand, the bookmarks peeking out waiting for you to pick up where you left off. 
There was a trinket tray for your jewelry on top of the dresser right next to the to the leather watch display box that you had gotten him for his birthday. And the drawers of that well-made, but overpriced wooden dresser were filling up with more and more of your things, just like he had hoped for when he got it.
He smiled to himself as he gently stroked your hair. The last time he was at your place, he had accidentally seen the letter from your apartment’s leasing office confirming your decision to not renew your rental agreement and your move out date. He hadn’t told you he knew, he’d rather hear it from you anyways. 
You would always be worth the wait.
The packages that were delivered to the door?
His, for now, until you moved in a couple months from now.
The name signed on the lease for the condo? 
His, for now, until you were ready to ink yours down on a deed for a new home with him. 
The little velvet box tucked away in the back corner of his nightstand? 
His, for now, but always meant to be yours.
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You can thank @mak-32 and her photo set of Rooster at the piano for this fic!
Also, many many thanks to @gretagerwigsmuse​ for being my go-to gal! I wouldn’t have been brave enough to post the smut if she hadn’t given me the all-caps go ahead! 
Here’s Bradley’s bedroom, if you’re curious!
You can check my other fics out here!
Taglist:
@sehnsuchts-trunken @top-hhun-main @itscheybaby @prettylittlelauraa @startrekfangirl2233 @marantha @callsign-viper @teacupsandtopgun @itsizzythebell @shanimallina87 @angelbabyange @boltgirl426 @oneelleandaneye @mizzzpink @cornishkat @torres-espana @uzumegui @dont-talk-me-down @fandomunite2107 @alana4610 @20th-centu-fairy-girl @pariahsparadise @pono-pura-vida @donttouchmycarrots @nina-sj @eg-dr3amer3 @whaledots-blog @a-beaverhausen @misty-inferno @angellwingsss @hangmanscoming @mandolin22 @theweekndhistorybook @lilpeekabooze @high-bi-imgonnacry @ahintofkiwistrawberry @mrsdaamneron @ruewrote @spiderman-stilinski @jayniebop @melllinaa @my-soulmate-is-mycroft @mandolin22 @imaginecrushes @soleilgrec @keyrani @finelytaylored @phantomxoxo @viridianphtalo @chicomonks​ @starryeyedstories​
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taexual · 9 months
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sleepwalking ● 1 | jjk
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summary: due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.
pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
genre: rockstar!jungkook / exes to lovers / fluff / angst / smut (in later chapters)
warnings: explicit language, suggestive themes, SLOW BURN
words: 7.5k
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chapter 1 ► when i open my eyes to the future, i can hear you say my name
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There was virtually not a single person left on the entire fourth floor of the company building, despite it being a Monday afternoon. Normally, two other managers worked in offices adjacent to yours, so the noise in the hallways never settled below a pleasant hum: producers, promoters, and publicists – the three cursed Ps – shuffled in and out, heels clicking urgently against the marble floor.
This funeral silence was unusual, but you knew it was only a calm before the storm.
Rated Riot were going on their first-ever European tour in two days to promote their sophomore album – named aptly, “ready, set, RIOT” – and today was the final day of meetings. Evidently, the executives at Jett Records assumed that the band deserved to have a whole floor to themselves, so everyone else got a half-day, leaving you and the Floor Administrator, Rue, all by yourselves until the band got here.
This unsettling silence was exactly why you heard them arrive as soon as the door of the building opened four floors below. Rated Riot lived up to their name by making themselves heard before they were seen.
As soon as the sharp ding! of the elevator reached you in your office—your door was always open on meeting days, because the four members of one of the most promising rock bands in the world at the moment lacked any sense of direction—you could immediately feel the atmosphere lighten, the previous silence long gone.
“Rue! The apple of my eye!” Hoseok, the drummer and the de facto mood setter of Rated Riot, exclaimed as you listened to the familiar sounds of the band as they exited the elevator and, based on the repeated clicking of shoes in the lobby, momentarily got disoriented.
“Always looking good, Rue!” Jungkook, the vocalist, as well as the new Golden Boy of Jett Records followed after.
“Good to see you again,” Taehyung, the always well-mannered bassist, said. Silence followed and you assumed he shook Rue’s hand.
“Hello,” Yoongi, who was, technically, the guitarist of the band, but, really, played any instrument he could get his hands on, was the last to speak. He’d always been very well-spoken in songwriting, but quieter and more careful in most everyday conversations.
“Welcome, guys,” Rue greeted them. You couldn’t see any of them from where your office was located, but you’ve been in a similar situation countless times before and you could imagine what was happening without needing to witness it first-hand.
Rue would stand up from her seat and point her right hand down the hallway, reminding them—yet again—that they needed to walk down the hall and take a right turn. The members of Rated Riot, in turn, would walk down the hall. At least one of the four of them would turn left instead, causing a pause as the group gathered back together, exchanging confused glances. Then, they would turn back to Rue—who would still be standing there, her right hand extended like a helpful Statue of Liberty. They’d laugh at themselves, nod at Rue, and take the correct turn.
If things were going well, they’d find your office on first try—they’d just need to find the open door and peer inside; your desk was right in front. More often than not, however, they stumbled around, knocking and chuckling to themselves as they continuously interrupted the offices of everyone else, but you.
They were special. Not just because they looked like loose ducklings, separated from the Mother Duck, whenever they entered the company building, but also because, in spite of their own lack of coordination, they still managed to get things done.
And they brightened the day of everyone they came across. Which was almost ironic—as you realised by watching the four of them enter your office—considering the effortless rockstar aura that surrounded them.
Jungkook walked in first. That was typical because he usually did: sometimes because he was the only one who remembered where your office was, but usually because the other members offered him as a sacrificial lamb when they went knocking around every office on the floor in search of yours.
He was dressed in all-black—always—adorned with silver chains and necklaces that often gave you a start when you looked up, because he had a very specific way of entering the room: he seemed to make sure to position himself in just a way that the light, coming in from the window behind you, always reflected off his jewellery and momentarily blinded you.
Sure enough, you blinked, cringing into yourself as the brightness hit your eyes, and when you opened them again, he was already grinning.
“Hi,” he said and the rest of the members followed in after him—a brighter palette of colours.
Even Yoongi, who was the only one who could have given Jungkook a run for his money if you had to count which one had more black items of clothing in their closet, was wearing a beige, loosely buttoned shirt.
Despite that, however, you could tell they were rock artists as soon as you looked at them—all tattoos, piercings, intense eye make-up behind sunglasses, and old band tees—and you stood up, excited to let them know that, finally, every last loose thread had been found and tightened. They’d get to introduce their artistry on a different continent, and you’d make sure it’d go smoothly.
“We’re leaving for Prague tomorrow morning,” you told them once the five of you settled down at the round table in the back of your office. “So, if you were planning a going away party, I strongly advise against it.”
“We weren’t,” Yoongi said, lifting his glass of lemon water—there was a jug on the table—and giving you a reassuring look. “This is the strongest drink I’m having tonight.”
“Thanks,” you said paradoxically enough, but being grateful when the members of the band you managed didn’t get drunk before an important day was part of the job. “I’d also appreciate it if—”
“Hold on a second, though,” Jungkook interrupted—you’d been anticipating it. “I’m going to a gig tonight, Reconnaissance are in town again. And there’s obviously an after-party—”
Despite Reconnaissance being, arguably, one of the most popular rock bands in the world right now, you were definite when you cut him off, “No.”
“—so, I—wait. No?” he paused. “I never miss their shows, you know that. And I don’t get drunk easily. You know that, too.”
“That’s why you drink so much,” you rebutted. The rest of the band members got their phones out, knowing well enough at this point that this would take a while. “And then I have to come get you out of trouble.”
“You absolutely do not have to do that,” Jungkook insisted. “We’ve been through this.”
“Have we?” you argued. “Because I keep telling you it’s my job to keep you from passing out in a dirty bar bathroom, but you don’t care enough to hear me.”
“Well, you’re not very convincing. What’s the worst that can happen? I’ll wake up again.”
You were used to having this conversation with him—you’ve argued about this way before he became a singer and you ended up as his manager. And yet, the lax way he said this made you clench your fists.
Despite being mostly introverted, Jungkook did enjoy getting drinks with friends: even if said friends enjoyed his celebrity status more than they enjoyed the drinks.
“And if you don’t?” you threatened. “Rated Riot’s vocalist gets his stomach pumped. A catchy headline.”
“Yeah, man,” Hoseok interjected, putting his phone screen down on the table and crossing his arms. “Doesn’t go well with the vibe we’re going for. Don’t get your stomach pumped.”
“Fine, I—”
“What he meant was, don’t drink so much that you’d need your stomach pumped,” you clarified because Jungkook moonlighted as a Loophole Finder.
“I never have!” he insisted. “Seriously, you treat me like I’m still nineteen. Have some faith.”
Out of the corner of your eye, you could see the other members of the group look up from their phones. The band had only formed a few years ago, so you were the only person in this room who knew what Jungkook was like when he was nineteen. You never spoke about it – that was likely why everyone was so curious.
In any case, Jungkook was wrong. You did have faith—that’s why you spent so many of your off-duty nights driving down deserted streets to pick him up after his asshole friends convinced him it was a good idea to try the biker bar on the outskirts of town, and he’d gotten in an altercation with a burly redneck that was twice his size.
There was no time for that now, not when he was supposed to be on stage in Prague in three days.
“Well,” Taehyung spoke up. “I was thinking of going to the show as well. Not so much the after-party, I have better plans. But, uh, I could come, after all.”
You appreciated the offer, but you knew that these better plans involved him spending time with his girlfriend, Luna, who was going to join him for a few weeks of the European tour, but after that, the two of them were going to be apart for several months.
“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to,” you said, not trying very much to hide the hopeful undertones in your voice. Jungkook’s friends felt intimidated by all the members of Rated Riot; they’d be on their best behaviour if Taehyung was there.
“No, I think it might be fun,” Taehyung said. You exhaled quietly and he could sense your gratitude without words. He turned to his younger bandmate. “Should we go together?”
Jungkook groaned and mumbled under his breath, “not if I have to third-wheel again.”
“When have you ever third-wheeled anyone?” you asked rhetorically, but he was already opening his mouth to reply. Quickly, you added, “be careful, is what I’m saying, okay? I am complaining about having to pick you up from all kinds of holes, but if you need me to bring NDAs, I will bring them. So, ask.”
Jungkook rolled his eyes, but chose to stay quiet. He knew better now – the one time he did not make anyone sign a non-disclosure agreement after an impromptu, drunken busking session in New York, pictures of him, half-dressed and giving a lap dance to a random, equally as drunk, groupie, were on every rock page on Instagram. Accompanied with detailed retellings of how it came to happen, of course; all of them more ridiculous than the next. Your personal favourite story was that he was recruiting members for a sex cult.
“We’ll call you,” Taehyung gave you a nod, “if we have to.”
“Perfect,” you said, glancing at Jungkook again, even though expecting him to confirm that he, too, would call you if he had to, was wishful thinking.
Every time you reminded him how he needed to start going out with a less destructive crowd, he’d treat his phone like a poisonous snake – and he’d been doing that even before you became his manager. His friends seemed to get their pleasure fix from watching you arrive and rip him a new one, so they were the ones who called you most of the time, always laughing into their phones like true accomplices.
It was funny how Jungkook was the only one who passed out or got so wasted, he ended up on a ferry to Martha’s Vineyard. His friends always walked away unscathed and, usually, only called you by the time they were back in their bedrooms – “when we left, he was ordering mint and honey daiquiris, you should probably go over there and check up on him.”
It was like they loved pushing him into danger and purposefully bringing the two of you together again, and Jungkook either didn’t realise or didn’t care anymore. It’s been a while, after all.
You and Jungkook had been broken up for almost two years when you got the unbelievable offer to manage an up-and-coming rock band. This was over two years ago now and you were only twenty-four back then. Up until that point, you had worked as an assistant manager for various indie artists, so that offer was massive.
You figured the downside that your ex-boyfriend happened to be in this particular band was worth it, considering the huge leap in your career you’d make by accepting this job.
And, for the most part (excluding the first two months that were pure chaos of repressed feelings), you and Jungkook both made this work, drawing a strict line between your relationship before Rated Riot (back when he still had your phone number saved as “❌”) and after he met you again as Rated Riot’s new manager (ironically, now your name on his phone was “❌❌❌”).
You’ve managed Rated Riot for almost exactly two years now, and if you’d asked the band – which you wouldn’t, partially out of humbleness, but also because you were scared – you’d know that they loved working with you as much as you loved working with them. So, in the end, it all really had been worth it.
“Check your emails for the descriptive itineraries,” you continued smoothly enough. The guys at the table put their phones down and returned their attention to you. “Now, who else is coming with us?”
Technically, the band wasn’t supposed to bring anyone – the label was explicitly clear about that. They wanted the first European tour to go “without a hitch” (meaning, without distractions), but you held a more liberal view here.
You didn’t think loved ones coming on the road were a distraction; if anything, they were a firm support mechanism that made touring easier for the artists.
“I know Luna’s staying until the Barcelona show, yeah?” you asked, double-checking the notes on your laptop.
Taehyung nodded, a small smile on his lips at the mention of the girl. “She flies out the next day, yeah.”
“Okay. Who else?”
“Well, Sid and Jude are coming,” Jungkook spoke up and, after seeing your eyes roll back, added, quieter, “and Minjun isn’t sure.”
The three musketeer-wannabes – Sid, Jude, and Minjun – were on speed dial on your work and personal phones, because if Rated Riot had a performance and the vocalist wasn’t there, it was likely those three who were to blame. They were the only ones who knew Jungkook longer than you did, and they seemed to take pride in the fact that they had successfully been causing you headaches for seven years now.
“Sid and Jude,” you repeated, “aren’t worried they’ll lose their jobs if they travel to Europe abruptly?”
“No, they’re cool,” Jungkook shrugged, not catching the mockery in your voice—both Sid and Jude worked for their families, which really meant that they got paid to occasionally show up at the shareholders’ meetings on behalf of their parents. “I’ll text Minjun right now. Maybe he’ll come when we’re in Poland…”
“I needed confirmation by last week,” you reminded him. “At the latest.”
He glanced at you from his phone and then went back to texting. “So, why’d you ask now?”
“To double-check,” you said. “They’re going to have to book the hotels themselves. Or sleep on the street. Honestly, I don’t really—”
“So, uh,” Yoongi interrupted before another argument could begin, “how many hotels this time?”
“Prague, Amsterdam, and Paris. And some nights in London, depending on our flight time,” you said with an apologetic smile. “Bring your favourite blankets. We’re living on buses for the next three months.”
None of them minded – if anything, you could see a little glitter in their eyes as they listened to you. Being on the road and having to sleep on the tour bus every night was an experience they’d missed. They hadn’t gone on an actual tour in almost a year – as someone who thrived on live performances, they had obviously missed this.
Really, you’ve missed it, too. Rated Riot may have been a riot to look after as their manager – pun fully intended – especially on tour, but they were your riot to deal with.
You liked your job and the challenges that came with it, because, in the end, you overcame most of them: starting with your previous relationship with Jungkook (no one in the band had a problem with it, and the label miraculously seemed not to know about it) and ending with your relatively young age (Jungkook was the only one who had a problem with you being his age, but he had a problem with almost everything).
Hopefully, one day you’d manage to overcome the challenge that was getting Jungkook to open his eyes and realise that the people he surrounded himself with were more groupies than his friends. But all in due time.
“If you have questions,” you said as the meeting approached its’ conclusion, “go right ahead.”
“Wake-up calls,” Yoongi said. “Any possibility of arranging those?”
You smiled – this had been traditional practice ever since you started to work with them.
“I’ll call,” you said and then remembered a particularly frustrating way in which this had backfired. You added, “and keep you on the phone until you’re out of bed.”
Back when you were an assistant manager to a different band, this had been your main task. And, you supposed, if Rated Riot had assistant managers, they’d be the ones making wake-up calls, too – however, the band had only started to live up to their potential now. Before you booked the European tour for them, Jett Records thought they barely needed one manager to begin with.
You’ve made it this far. If the tour went well, maybe you’d get to expand your team as the band gained popularity.
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Jungkook felt giddy the whole night. The Reconnaissance show with Taehyung and Luna was a lot of fun, as expected—he’d seen the band five times before tonight, and they never failed to let him down.
When he arrived at the after-party, he was nearly vibrating with excitement—on top of everything, he was going on tour tomorrow and he knew he might lose his mind over it—and this was usually the time when he tended to get reckless.
He did drink a little too much to retain a completely sober mind, but he stayed true to his word and did not wander anywhere or caused any—serious—trouble. You would have said that’s because Sid and Jude weren’t with him, but Jungkook was convinced it was because he simply had great self-control when he put his mind to it.
The only place he went to after the party was his family’s house, so he could say goodbye to his grandma. She probably wouldn’t even hear him—and if she would, then she probably wouldn’t recognise him—but he couldn’t leave to Europe without saying goodbye to her.
He thought he’d take his Katana to the house, but then remembered immediately the last time he got on his motorcycle drunk – his grandma had, literally, smacked him on the back with a rolling pin, yelling about how careless he was. She didn’t say that she hit him out of concern for his safety—that was obvious—and, instead, she focused on how hard he’d worked on restoring the bike after he’d bought it; his first purchase with the money that he made off Rated Riot’s music.
“Don’t you want it to last?” she had said then. She’d been the only person who believed he could bring the bike to life, despite it not having a single properly functioning part, least of all the engine. “You worked so hard on it. Do you want to wreck it in one night?”
Tonight, however, everyone in the house was asleep when he arrived. It was quiet, so he tried to be silent as he went up the stairs to her room—and then knocked over a picture frame after his feet fumbled on the carpet in the hallway. But no one went out to check who was making the noise—which was dangerous, he realised for a brief, semi-sober second; but the house had security, so he figured they were safe from outsiders—and he gently lowered the handle on his grandma’s door, peering inside.
The room was painted in blue hues from the night light next to the bed where his grandma was sleeping. He approached—really trying to be quiet this time—and carefully pulled her comforter up, so she wouldn’t get cold, even though the room felt warm.
It was always warm here and Jungkook had to bite his lip when he realised how much he missed sitting here as a child while dozens of his cousins ran around the house and wreaked loud, childish havoc. How much he missed his grandma reading him books—never children’s stories, he always insisted she read him the thickest, most boring books he could find on her shelves, just so he could stay in her room longer, listening to her soothing voice and feeling her comforting warmth.
Sniffling quietly, he leaned closer to her and brushed a strand of white hair from her face, listening to her soft breathing as she slept, unaware of his presence.
“I’ll be back soon,” he promised in a whisper as he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. She didn’t wake. “We will talk again then.”
He knew he’d keep this promise even if she didn’t hear it, even if she didn’t remember. But leaving her room felt painful and he was far less excited now. The alcohol had begun to wear off and heaviness settled in his chest instead. This happened sometimes when he was left alone with his thoughts, especially after he visited his grandma.
He'd come back, he knew he would. But as he glanced at his grandma’s sleeping frame one more time—remembering how she hadn’t called him by his name in months; not one glint of recognition in her eyes when she’d see him—he wondered if he’d have anyone to come back to.
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Surprising exactly no one, Jungkook was the only one who did not answer your wake-up call the next morning. Having foreseen this, you’d already called Hoseok, Yoongi and Taehyung – in that order, because the first two took the longest to wake up, and by that time, Taehyung was already awake on his own – and only then attempted to reach the one remaining member.
Fifteen minutes later, you were already dressed and ready to drive over to his house and personally wake him up with an icy bath in bed. And just then, your phone rang – his name as the caller’s ID.
“Look who—”
“Okay, okay,” Jungkook’s groggy voice cut you off before you could greet him with the appropriate sarcastic remark. “I’m awake. Halfway in the shower.”
“I don’t hear running water.”
He responded with a groan first, then shuffling. You waited patiently, balancing the phone on your shoulder as you unlocked the door of your apartment. Finally, you could hear the water start running on the other end of the call.
“Happy?” Jungkook asked, always the brightest of all rays of sunshine in the morning.
“Ecstatic,” you replied, equally as enthusiastically. “Sending a car to pick you up in half an hour. Don’t be late.”
“I can drive myself—”
“No driving when you’re hungover,” you said, not for the first time. “In fact, don’t even go near your Katana.”
He considered several ways to respond to you; first and foremost, defending his beloved, navy-coloured Suzuki Katana with a matte coating, custom-made leather seat covers, golden rims, purring engine, and—anyway. He ended up choosing to respond with a question, “how do you know I’m hungover?”
“I’ve known you for almost ten years,” you replied. “If you go out drinking the night before, you’ll wake up hungover.”
“Well, how do you know I drank that much last ni—?”
“Listen,” you cut him off, hoisting your suitcases over the threshold of your front door. You fixed your phone against your cheek and continued, “how about you take that shower, and we’ll resume this nice little Q&A at the airport?”
“No,” he replied and, in a purposefully exaggerated breathy voice said, “I simply can’t stop talking to you.”
“Hanging up now.”
Jungkook laughed as he listened to the beep, indicating the end of the call. Putting his phone on the side of the sink, he took his shirt off and was about to continue undressing when his phone vibrated and nearly fell off the sink.
Scrambling to catch it, he smacked it against the cupboard and exhaled in relief when he saw that the screen hadn’t cracked. He was expecting a text from you – a threat, in case he’d go back to bed – but it was actually Sid, asking for the time of his flight.
His friends were taking a separate flight out to Prague – they weren’t happy about it and neither was he, but at least they’d get to hang out in Europe eventually – and, obviously, they wanted to know what time they’d meet up and where.
He double-checked the itinerary you’d emailed him, got confused about the time zone difference and texted Sid back.
“Gonna be there the day before the show,” his text said, “jetlag. Sleep. Maybe beer? Catch u there.”
Sid was, of course, delighted to hear the mention of beer and Jungkook snickered to himself before he resumed undressing for his shower—knowing from experience that you wouldn’t be above shipping him to Prague in the cargo section on the plane if he was late to the airport.
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As it turned out, for the first time in his life, Jungkook was so terribly jet-lagged, that he did not feel like doing anything – not even drinking with friends – but sleeping.
He slept through the whole layover in Paris – and, consequently, through Taehyung and Luna’s stories about the 5 minutes they got to spend in front of the Eiffel Tower before rushing back to the airport (never mind that it was about 2 AM) – as well as the flight to Prague.
He only woke up on the bus ride to the hotel when he felt something nudging his lips and opened his eyes to find an open bottle of Coca-Cola in your hands as you held it by his face.
“Did you just—” he started to say, but his voice sounded brittle, more a croak than a voice, really. He cleared his throat and tried again, “did you just wake me up by making me sniff soda?”
“It worked,” you replied, nudging the bottle at him again. “Drink. You need sugar. You didn’t eat anything on the plane here.”
“I had that bagel on the flight to Paris,” he mumbled, but sat up properly and took the bottle from you.
“That was a croissant,” you clarified. It was almost cute to see him barely awake. “And I warned you about flying with a hangover. You did this to yourself.”
“I’m fine,” he replied after taking a big gulp of coke. “Not sure which day it is, but other than that, I’m perfect. Do you have anything for headaches?”
Snickering, you nodded. “Yeah, give me a second.”
You went to fetch your carry-on bag and returned with ibuprofen, which allowed him to go back to sleep until you arrived at the hotel. The other members were also in and out of slumber, but that was their own fault. You and the other girls on this tour, which, really, only meant Luna— Taehyung’s girlfriend—and Maggie—the tour photographer—had planned ahead and taken sleeping pills as soon as the plane took off. Meanwhile, every man on this trip thought too much of himself.
By the time you arrived to the hotel and checked in, it was already lunchtime. If this had been your first time travelling with Rated Riot, you would have been beyond surprised to see what effect food had on them: they looked like they'd just returned from the most refreshing vacation in the Caribbean. Lively conversation and cheerful laughter echoed around the table – no one would have guessed that they’d just spent over 13 hours on airplanes. Their recovery was nearly always miraculous.
And, naturally, since they were feeling better, they wanted to do something as soon as the first rehearsal was over. You had far too many things to do before the show tomorrow, so you couldn’t babysit them – again, an assistant manager would have been life-saving – but you knew you’d still have to keep an eye on them.
Taehyung and Luna went sightseeing, but they were the sort who kept you updated on their adventures through pictures, which you were endlessly grateful for. There was never a reason to worry here; if you were a teacher who had to pretend not to have a favourite student, Taehyung would be the student you were pretending about.
Yoongi and Hoseok, initially, went to a record store together, but then split up – one of them returned to the hotel for a nap, and the other one went café-hopping. Those two were also fine – they usually took some members of the crew with them anyway, so you knew that in the worst-case scenario, you’d still have several people you could call to reach them.
Now Jungkook was going to meet up with Sid and Jude, both of whom had, most unfortunately, successfully landed in Prague. The Diabolical Duo would take him out drinking, you had no doubt about it – and this was where you’d have to step in with another warning. You weren’t the angry mother, dragging her children by their ears, but you felt it necessary to remind Jungkook of what was at stake if he allowed his friends to be their usual, obnoxious selves tonight.
However, you didn’t want to ask, so you had to figure out where to find them yourself. You didn’t even have to use the seven years that you’ve known them to deduce two logical, universal-for-all-assholes things: one, Jungkook’s friends wouldn’t be nearly tired enough not to want to drink. Two, they’d be too jet-lagged to look for their usual hole-in-the-wall spot that sold drinks. Therefore, they’d have to settle for the bar of the hotel.
And when you exited the elevator on the ground floor later that night, your assumption was confirmed – you could hear their laughter from where you were standing in the lobby.
You’d texted Jungkook as you arrived, hoping he’d leave his friends and come see you at the back of the bar for a minute, but unfortunately, Sid and Jude noticed you and waved you over with loud cheers.
Embarrassed as the people in booths around you began to turn to look, you swallowed and walked towards the front where Jungkook and his friends were sitting by the bar.
“Wow, it’s been so long!” Jude exclaimed as you approached. In your opinion, it wasn’t nearly long enough, but you only lifted the corners of your lips and did not comment.
“Jungkook, a moment?” you said instead.
“Let’s get you a drink!” Sid suggested as though you hadn’t spoken and extended a hand, clicking his fingers to get the bartender’s attention. “Hey! Can we get some Margaritas here?”
You cringed watching this, but, again, restrained yourself. They could behave like pricks all they wanted; it wasn’t their reputation that you had to protect. Someone else would, hopefully, teach them a lesson.
“Sure,” Jungkook said to you, sliding off the stool. He seemed sober enough to walk without any sort of waddling or stand without swaying, but you could tell by the relaxation behind his eyes, that he was already tipsy.
His friends patted him on the back and whistled as he followed you to a quieter spot in the back of the bar. He shook his head at them—but had a grin on his face, and for that alone you wanted to punch him.
“Can I count on you to take it easy?” you asked, once the two of you were out of earshot. “Not because you’ll make my job much harder if you don’t, but because you have a rehearsal tomorrow at eight, and that’s hard with the jet lag alone, but add a hangover into the mix, and—”
“I’ll be fine,” he said, but you’ve heard this song many times before. It was one of his top hits. “I’m actually tired, so I might have a few and then go straight to bed.”
“Okay,” you said, choosing to believe him, because that was easier than making him sign a contract, swearing not to wake up in a dumpster. “Can you text me when you’re back in your room? So I know you’re not lost somewhere in Prague with Dumb and Dumber.”
His lip twitched in an almost-smile at the nickname, but he resisted – a loyal friend, even if they didn’t deserve it – and gave you a nod.
“Fine,” he said. “I’ll text you. And I won’t get lost.”
“Okay—” you started to say and then squinted your eyes at him, realizing. “I meant don’t go wandering the city streets while drunk.”
He snorted and placed a hand on your left shoulder. Gazing into your eyes, he enunciated very dramatically, “I will not get into trouble. Promise.”
You pursed your lips. “You’d better not.”
“I realise what that would mean, believe it or not,” he said, straightening. “Tomorrow is an important day. I’d never do anything to ruin it.”
“I know,” you said. “I trust you to make smart choices. I don’t trust them.”
You pointed at the twosome by the bar – both of them watching you like you were the entertainment of the night – and Jungkook turned to look. Sid and Jude both immediately waved at him. Jungkook waved back and, when he looked at you again, he was smiling softly.
Clearly, he genuinely enjoyed hanging out with those two. You’d never believe that there was anything about them that was bearable—let alone enjoyable—so Jungkook’s weird attachment to them had to come from some sort of weird destructive force inside of him.
“I’ll keep them in check,” he said and then, possibly prompted by the skeptical frown on your face, he felt the need to explain, “they help me relax. If it weren’t for them, I’d probably be shaking from anxiety all the time. Kind of like you are.”
He winked as he said that last part, grinning at his own wit, but you rolled your eyes in response.
“Goodnight,” you said then. “Don’t forget to text me.”
“Are you going to stay up late waiting for my text?” his tone was humorous and it stopped you from leaving.
“Hopefully not,” you said, ignoring the flirty comment that was obviously meant to rattle your composure. “But it’d do you well to remember that I can make life very difficult for you if you disobey me.”
He lifted his eyebrows at this, but did not lose the grin. “Oh? Will I get punished if I—”
“Goodnight, Jungkook,” you said again—louder—and turned away.
You glanced over your shoulder when you reached the archway leading to the lobby and caught him watching you leave—he was still beaming, but he composed himself and nodded when he caught your eye. You nodded back.
Maybe he really would be fine tonight.
And, truly, Jungkook had meant what he’d said – he couldn’t wait for tomorrow and there was nothing he’d do to ruin that. Not even if the smirking faces of his friends prompted him to laugh as soon as he returned to his seat by the bar.
“What do you want, assholes?” he asked, punching Jude on the shoulder as he walked past his friends. As soon as he sat down, leaving Sid in the middle, he took a big gulp of the beer he’d left waiting; only his third one tonight.
“We don’t want anything,” Jude said, still smirking. “What did she want? Another moral how you’re not being a good boy?”
Jungkook rolled his eyes. “No—”
“I was always curious,” Sid interrupted. “Was she like that when you dated, too? You know, always in charge?”
Even before you and Jungkook had settled into a steady enough rhythm of working with each other, neither of you spoke to others about your relationship. Not while you were dating, and not after you broke up. So, all your friends—real friends and whoever the hell Sid and Jude were—essentially knew nothing of your relationship.
And there was nothing he’d tell them now.
It’s been four years since you broke up—plenty of time to move on. Not to mention, you were both (trying to be) professionals. There was no point to bring back the past; there never had been.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Jungkook teased, managing to keep the banter going without revealing how the question irked something inside him.
“I would. That’s why I asked,” Sid replied, laughing haughtily. A few heads turned his way. Sid sounded very much like an entitled heir—or an elephant high on helium—when he laughed, especially when there was nothing funny going on. “I mean, you never talked about her to us. Was it getting rid of her that made you who you are today?”
Jude snorted, slapping Sid on the back in a half-supportive, half-warning manner. Jungkook knew that the level of your patience for his friends ranged from Sid (no patience) to Jude (case-by-case), to Minjun (bearable)—and he could see why.
“I didn’t get rid of her,” he said, an edge to his voice. “We broke up and moved on. Did you hear from Minjun?”
Sid laughed again—even louder than before; the glasses behind the bar seemed to clatter.
“Look at him, trying to change the topic!” he wheezed, looking at Jude over his shoulder.
“Leave him be, man,” Jude said and nodded at Jungkook. “So many girls around us and this dumbass is still hung up on your ex, huh?”
Jungkook finished his beer and held the liquid behind his cheeks for a second before swallowing. He caught the bartender’s eye and lifted his empty glass, indicating a refill.
“I don’t think I’m the one who’s hung up,” Sid said with a very knowing look in his eye.
Jungkook looked at him and raised his eyebrows—surprised and momentarily distracted from his drink. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“Well, you come to her as soon as she calls, like a puppy,” Sid replied. “So, you tell me.”
“I have to come when she calls,” Jungkook defended. “She’s my manager.”
“Yeah, dumbass,” Jude said, slapping Sid on the back of the head this time. “She’s his manager.”
Jungkook suddenly found himself smiling when he realised that you’d probably consider this the reason why Sid acted the way he did sometimes – permanent brain damage from Jude’s incessant slaps.
“Well, then someone,” Sid said, angrily accentuating the word—the anger was clearly directed at Jude, but the pronoun at Jungkook, “has a fucking crush on their manager.”
“I don’t have a crush—”
Sid spoke over him, “I bet you could never get her to go out with you again.”
Jungkook saw the bartender approach to pour him a drink and he heard Jude scoffing, but he could only blink, taken aback by what sounded like an accusation.  “Why—why would I even—why—”
“Oh, see, see?!” Sid screeched, turning to Jude with a triumphant expression. Jude gave him a pitiful look—and looked about ready to give him a black eye, too. “He knows I’m right, it’s why he’s stuttering!”
“Dude,” Jude said slowly. “You are yelling.”
Jungkook cleared his throat, nodding at the bartender as a thank-you and then bringing his refilled glass to his lips. “And I’m not stuttering.”
“You so are, my man,” Sid taunted, patting Jungkook on the shoulder with so much force, the beer nearly spilled from the glass and from his mouth. “Your ass is so whipped, you’re going to be singing at her wedding to some random producer.”
Suddenly hyper-aware that there were several producers on tour with them right now, Jungkook put his drink down and straightened in his seat.
“I’m not fucking singing at weddings,” he said.
“Not yet,” Sid pointed out, grinning. He knew he'd gotten under his skin.
“Okay, come on now,” Jude interjected, leaning back in his seat to be able to see Jungkook. “You promised you’d sing at my wedding.”
“As if anyone would ever marry you,” came Sid’s snide.
“You shut the fuck up,” Jude snarled, but there was no malice behind his bark. “I have more chances of marrying someone than he has of marrying his manager.”
“He—oh, fuck!” Sid was about to argue, but then burst into laughter—so loud and thunderous again, that the bartender was forced to glance over at the security guards by the entrance to the bar. “That’s good! You’re so right!”
“Both of you are fucking idiots,” Jungkook spoke. The edges of his vision were red. “I could get her to go out with me again if I wanted to.”
“Oh, sure, sure,” Sid nodded, wiping invisible tears from his eyes. “Big talk.”
“Jungkook, no offense, my dude,” Jude said, leaning forwards this time. “Let him have this one. Sid may be dumber than box of rocks, but he’s got a point here. Forget about her.”
Another insinuation that had Jungkook throwing his head back in frustration.
“There’s nothing to forget!” he groaned. “What the fuck are you even talking about? I just fucking told you I moved on.”
“So why are you getting all riled up, then?” Sid smirked, more and more satisfied with each curse that he provoked out of him.
Jungkook felt even angrier, because he was getting riled up, but he had a good reason for it. He enjoyed banter as much as the next person, but he did not enjoy mockery at his own expense—especially not the kind that involved you.
He snapped back, “because you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”
His friends snickered at this – convinced that his irritation only proved the point they were both making – and Jungkook clenched his jaw, annoyed.
“If anything,” he added sharply as he picked his beer up—as if that could somehow distance him from this conversation, “it’s her who’s still hung up on me.”
That was a cheap, childish defence, and everyone by the bar knew it.
“Yeah, right!” Sid cried out, but resisted from laughing again. “We’ve heard her yell at you more times than we can count. You fucking wish she was still hung up on you.”
“Okay, to be fair, Sid can probably only count to five,” Jude added—Sid finally punched him on the shoulder—as he toyed with the paper umbrella on his fourth cocktail; the Margaritas they’d ordered were long gone. “But he’s right, you know? You’d never get her to go out with you again.”
There was pity in Jude’s voice—as if he felt sorry that Jungkook lived in denial, chasing after you and convincing himself that it was only a matter of time before you’d come back to him.
This made Jungkook’s temper vile, his face red, hot, and angry. He slammed his beer back on the table, forcing some of it to spill. “Yes, I fucking would!”
Sid was hiccupping as he laughed.
“Okay, okay, listen—let’s make a proper bet,” he managed. He picked up a napkin from the bar top, then looked around for something to write on it with—not finding anything, he stood up from his seat and leaned over the bar, grabbing a pen before the bartender could notice. “$1000 says you can’t get her to go on a date with you again.”
He glanced at Jude for approval—Jude shrugged.
“I’d suggest $500,” he said. “We don’t want to rob him blind.”
Jungkook’s face remained stoic, prideful.
“Fine with me. But you have no idea what you’re getting yourselves into,” he bit.
“Oh, that’s right, he’s been awfully cocky about the whole thing, hasn’t he?” Sid spoke, addressing his rhetorical question at the bar. He wrote something on the napkin and then lifted it to show the number “4000” to Jungkook. “How about this: Jude and I each pay you $2000 if you win. But if you lose, you give us your Katana.”
Jungkook lifted his eyebrows, the sudden mention of his bike catching him off-guard. Sid came from old money, he could afford fifteen brand-new motorcycles with the change he found in his suitcase, probably.
“How is that fair?” he asked. “Do you even know how much a Suzuki costs these days? It’s not $4000, I can tell you that much.”
“Why should you care?” Sid asked, his eyes glinting with mischief. “You were so confident about winning the bet just a second ago. Scared you’ll lose after all?”
In his defence, Jungkook did hesitate for half a moment. But there was a shit-eating grin on Sid’s mouth that he wanted to wipe off more than anything else, and he downed the rest of his beer in one big gulp—a showcase of his determination.
“Not at all,” he said then. He wasn’t sure if he was lying as he said this, but he had no time to figure that out. He extended his hand at Sid. “Get your money ready.”
Here, he was putting up a front – this wasn’t about the money at all. It was more a thing of pride; they were teasing him, purposefully making fun of him—and he wanted to prove them wrong, regardless if they were actually wrong.
Smirking, Sid shook his hand—cementing the bet between all three of them, as Jude was busy finishing off his cocktail—and was about to say something when Jungkook jumped off his stool.
“Have to go now,” he said, always a show-off with his overly creative comebacks when he was tipsy. “My horoscope predicts a date and a big fortune in my near future. Got to prepare.”
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chapter title credits: sleep token, “rain”
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special shout-out & thank you to @eleni-cherie who delivered the much-appreciated kicks in the ass, so that i would keep writing. the odds were really against me, so if it weren't for you & our in-depth fanfic discussions, i definitely wouldn't even be writing this note right now, let alone finally starting this story 💜
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thelastofhyde · 12 days
Text
a mercenary named time.
pairing. jackson!joel x fem!reader
synopsis. as joel begins to age, memories of sarah are beginning to fade. though he wants nothing more than to talk to you about his troubles, there's something standing in his way: he never told you about sarah.
warnings. this is more joel x sarah centric than joel x reader oops, hurt/comfort, ageing + difficulties that come with it, grief, mentions of death/religion/afterlife+ generally other sensitive topics, fluff, does this count as whump? (v minimum editing/proofreading)
word count. 4.9k
hyde’s input. wrote this as an attempt to distract myself from the fact i was on a plane (i hate flying). not much happens plot wise, and it just becomes me analyzing joel (in my own way) halfway through but hey, i wrote it and, though it's nowhere near perfect, i'm gonna post it!
due to the ties tlou has with zionism, here are helpful posts/links regarding the ongoing genocide in palestine. from the river to the sea. ( post, link, post )
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Aging has become a threat again.
A part of him wonders if the threat ever truly left, or if it simply migrated south of his brain, chasing a warmth only leisure possesses, to make way for a survivalist winter’s cold. With the safety of walls and the sanctity of the commune, at last he’s caught on to the passing of time, the slow-crawling spider who spun its web into his skin. 
During the cold, there'd only been movement. Pacing down streets divided by those who live in fear and those who brandish riot gear, and tip-toeing past fungal-faced mutations, and stumbling in a daze of pain through snow to find her. A safety distance of unmarked miles, away from that hospital, is what it took for him to finally pull over, cut the engine and exhale. Out with the panic, and the urgency, and the fear. Ellie was there, laid across the back seats, a paper gown as blue as any April sky, a cursed relic upon her sleeping form, terrorising him with images of what could’ve been, had he failed to save her too.
In the warmth, there’s tranquillity. Stretched out legs upon worn out sofas, quiet hums of forgotten tunes on rescued guitars, tangled limbs on love-stained sheets. A home, a daughter, and a you, whatever you may be. A fallen angel, a summer fairy, a ray of sun. Any form you come from, he accepts it, welcomes it. Thanks it for bringing you to him, smelling fresh as a daisy, riding up next to him on his first patrol, smiling as sweet as the honey he’d eaten with his breakfast when you asked him if he needed help reigning in his horse.
No, he’d grunted more than spoken to you. And wound up flung off its back, ten paces later. From the ground staring up, he’d watched your face appear above him. Bitten back laughter, a stretched out hand, and a question of if he wanted to swap rides, take your mare for the day.
She’s far friendlier, you’d assured him, after he let you think it was your strength that pulled him back to his feet. Takes to strangers a little easier than him, you’ll be safe.
And he’d believed it, against his own nature.
Tommy had been the one to notice, to nudge him hours later and nod his head in your direction. Real sweetheart, ain’t she? Joel’d said nothing. Shrugged his shoulders, dipped his head, sipped the whiskey out his cup. Tracked your movement across the room like a hunter stalks its prey. Or, maybe, it was more like a bee examining a flower, wondering if the pretty vibrance of your outsides carried a match to your insides, if the taste of your soft petals was a great enough sweetness to satisfy a craving he’d long foregone.
Four months of observing later, spring came and he stung.
Since then, you’ve been his, whatever that may mean anymore.
He’d already been yours.
And yet he finds himself unable to tell you of his recent trouble, the emerging signs of his age that the needle of time has begun to stitch into his seams.
The greys that curl upon his head grow more frequent. Blink, and they seem to double. His skin stretches differently than before, at times it feels he wears it more than owns it. There’s aches, and pains, and cracks from his joints, where before there’d been numbness and tiredness. A back that refuses to straighten like it used to, no matter how hard he stretches under the fleeting warm drops of his morning shower.
A guilty conscience whispers in a voice much like Tess’, a memory of her telling him ageing means he’s still here, even if she’s not. It’s harder to find the good in it, anymore, when he has so much to lose again.
It’s his memory that scares him most. Like a photo album, the images within seem to fade with time and, the more he grabs at them, the more they wear away.
It started with something small. Forgetting you’d told him you would be heading over to visit Maria and the baby after your patrol shift, leading his heart to near beat out his chest as he raced down to the stables like some crazed man, rambling about how something’s happened to you, you’re not back, only for some kid- Jessie, a friend of Ellie’s- to tell him you came back hours ago. He’d pulled you a little tighter against him that night as you crawled into bed, the earlier unnecessary fear a little too visceral in his racing heart.
Then, it happened more often.
Ellie asked him to help her clean out the garage space for her, he forgot and agreed to cover someone’s turn cleaning the stables.
You told him of your love of mint tea, and instead he found you green.
Tommy asked him across the dinner table- a double date, a cause to debut Ellie’s first solo babysitting duties- if he remembered the name of that old bar they’d liked, and his mind was blank. Empty.
All of it, inconvenient. Yet he could brush it off, let it affect him only like a bruise: momentarily, till it faded.
Until recently.
Until the memories of her began to fade.
He’d woken up one morning, earlier than you like always. Kissed your sleeping face, creeped down the creaking staircase, switched on the stove to boil some coffee. And realised he could no longer remember what she’d liked better: pancakes or waffles.
A few weeks later, he tried recalling what shade of blue her soccer team’s kit was. Was it light blue? Or a darker blue, like fresh denim? Was it even blue at all?
Ellie asked him, the caution she used to bring towards mentioning her name long gone with the changing of seasons, if she’d liked any comic books. The sound of a runner, itching and twitching behind some fence interrupted before she could notice he didn’t have an answer.
Sure, she read. He couldn’t count the number of times he’d caught her curled up in bed, the light of her torch illuminating more than just the pages of a book, but her face, too expressive for her own good at times, reacting to each twist and turn of the story. Sometimes, he’d stand in that doorway, unnoticed, till her eyes dropped shut and the light rolled out her hand. Other times, he’d clear his throat, catch her off guard, and tell her get to bed, kiddo, or I’ll tell Mrs. Atkinson you’ll be round after school tomorrow.
What use is it, however, remembering all that, if he can’t remember if she liked comics?
He should talk to someone about it, he knows. He’d tried to, at first. Had tried to drink the courage into him, sat across Tommy one late night, sat around a fire as they settled in for a night in the ski lodge, stranded by some heavy snowfall. He failed then, just like he failed when he tried to tell Ellie, till she raced off to throw snowballs at some kids and he remembered she was too young to listen to his burden, too beaten by life already to deserve stress within the respite of Jackson’s sanctuary. When he failed a fourth time to speak to Tommy, the real issue dawned on him.
He wants to talk to you. You’re the one he talks to, the one he goes to bear his wounds to, trusting no other’s love but your own to patch him up and calm him down. There’s only one issue, however.
He’s not told you about Sarah.
It was never a conscious decision, some secret he’d chosen to hide. Speaking about her simply hurt and, after the arduous months of crossing the country with Ellie, finding a place to call home in Jackson, and learning to hold somebody close again, he’d wanted to get away from pain, for a little while.
Then came the first anniversary of her death spent inside the commune. He’d drank himself blind, like every year before. There’s a hazy memory of that night he’s glad to suppress, one where he’s covered in his own vomit and you’re struggling to hold his weight up under a pouring shower, the sounds of his sobs muffled into your soaked sweater. He’d awakened, and awaited the questioning. Expected to open his eyes and find you stood at the foot of his bed, arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed. Seeing the room empty was a shock, but drifting slowly down the stairs and finding you scrubbing the stains out of his shirts near floored him. 
The very same shirt you wear now, curled up on the sofa. Your eyes are shut, legs are bare, and there’s a gentle breeze that blows at the curtains you’d hung up, your first act upon moving in with him.
With a careful step, he avoids the creaking floorboard as he crosses the threshold. Slow as he can, he lowers the bag off his shoulder and props it gently against the wall, careful it doesn’t slip and let its contents spill out. Then he works at his laces, undoes them one by one, loosens them so his feet meet no resistance as he steps out of them. The summer’s heat affords him the liberation from heavy coats, less layers to shed now he’s returned to you at last.
You lay right, he strays left. Towards the kitchen, footsteps light as he can manage. Two chairs are pulled out at the table, two bowls sit drying neatly by the sink. Ellie must’ve stopped by for dinner. He’s glad to know she’s eaten, glad to know you kept each other company, glad to know the light is off in the shed and her snoring fills the hollow space. And he’s glad to find some food for him. He takes a bite, lifts the plate, finds a note beneath. Your handwriting, what do Joel Miller and breakfast have in common? followed by an arrow, urging him to turn the page around. The answer’s there, weakening his ageing knees. I can’t start my day without them.
Back by the sofa, a book sits split open, spine broken and pages pressed into ageing wood. Its cover is faded, frayed, much like he feels himself becoming.
He recognises it as one he’d gifted you, seasons ago. If he tries hard enough, he can remember the snow collecting in his unruly hair as he waited at your doorstep, and the way your smile melted the chill away, and the mumbling fool he’d made of himself upon handing the present over to you, some version of said you were bored, so I found this for you all he managed before turning on his heel and striding back to his own home, ignoring the teasing smile upon Ellie’s face.
After all this time, you still have it. Still read it. The fact slows his heart, soothes his aching back. Suddenly, he’s more than ready to head back out there, beyond the walls of Jackson, if it means collecting more books for you to remember him by when he’s long gone and withered away, no more than a familiar smell stained into your sheets and a fading warmth in the palm of your hand.
Two loud pops sound out of his knees as he crouches down by your side, the smell of your shampoo flooding his senses the closer he grows to your sleeping form. There’s a want, nestled deep inside his bones, to pull you into his arms and deliver you upstairs to a bed made for two, in search of a peace his soul has not found since he’d left for his shift in the early hours of the morning. It would be cruel, however, to wake you when you’re so beautiful.
Joel once thought he’d liked you best when you were smiling, till you’d fallen asleep on his porch one night, after hours of talking his ears off. Since then he’s liked you best sleeping, resting. Comfortable enough to trust his watchful eye to keep any harm away while your body takes back its much needed rest, even on days like this when he’s not physically there. You’ve got his shirt, his scent embedded into every thread of it, and that’s enough to keep you safe.
The rough of his fingertips reach out to graze the soft of your cheeks, gently dancing up to comb a few strands of damp hair away from your face. It seems you’ve gained your own spider, the faintest of lines beginning to take shape upon your skin. You wear it better than him, Joel thinks, the passing of time upon your body a picture of love, and prosperity, and hope for more time to come. He wears it like a burden, however. A death sentence, a timer on how long till the cold hand of Death takes the place of your warm one clasped in his.
Adjusting to a life he fears to leave has not been easy. There’d been a time where the promise of death was a comfort. To wake each day, reckless with his time and mindless to his body, a thought of all the pain, and all the sorrow, and that overwhelming, heavy, overbearing loneliness that hung over him like a storm cloud at last coming to an end and ceasing to exist, it had kept him going. Though faith died alongside her, a dream of reuniting with his babygirl on the other side was one he clung to on nights when no drop of alcohol and no unlabeled pill was enough to send him off to sleep. Death now, however, means parting from you, from Ellie, from Tommy. It no longer comforts so much as it disturbs him.
Would you comfort yourself, in the wake of his death, with dreams of reuniting someday, down the line, when Death takes you by the hand and guides you back to Joel?
He can only hope his babygirl can forgive the way he now longs to keep living, in spite of her waiting patiently for him in whatever comes after this life. Perhaps his failing memory is a consequence of this, a punishment she sends for making her wait even longer to feel his embrace again, slowly stealing away the only parts of her Joel has anymore.
Even in guilt, he can’t bring himself to believe his Sarah would do such a thing. Her heart was never touched by the bitterness that had hardened his own, her soul pure a freshly fallen snow.
I want you to be loved, dad. Echoes of her voice in his mind, words she’d confessed to him with teary eyes, a half-eaten birthday cake sitting between them, two candles, one in the shape of three, the other a zero, tossed messily on the table. There’d been no real fuss for his thirtieth, at his own insistence. Just his parents, his brother, his daughter. Those he loved, gathered around one table, eating away at food he’d made.
I’m already loved, kiddo. I got you, don’t I?
Joel knew what it meant to feel unloved. For a long time, that’s all he felt. The love only a child could gift died just as quickly in his arms as she had, under the watchful teary eyes of his brother. Grief he dragged around with him, dedicated to both her and the love he no longer felt.
First came denial. A steady 48 hours post-mortem, in which he walked ahead of Tommy and convinced himself she was there, a few feet behind him, talking her uncle’s ears off as he made sure to clear any oncoming threats The denial culminated in him bleeding down the side of his face, a missed bullet somewhere left behind, and Tommy’s pleading voice trying to move him forward, dragging him to tents set up by the army.
Eleven stitches, each one imbedding loss and cowardice into his screaming skin. The anger settled in a few days later. It made a home within Joel, latched onto his heart and began to beat in place of it. It changed him, aged with him, convinced him it was the only partner he’d ever need. A hopeful glimmer of bargaining came in the shape of Tess. But anger and all its roots were too deeply burrowed within Joel, unwilling to be weeded out, no matter how firm the hand. 
Complacency was far easier than any fight. Tommy left, the buzz of a firefly seducing him with the idea of better, of more, of a cure. Joel convinced himself things were easier without Tommy and his morals around. The routine of waking, struggling, drinking, passing out was one he practised well and thoroughly. Till Marlene and her suicide mission.
Then, the strangest thing happened. Ellie, with all her snark, and her crass words, and her humourless puns, reminded Joel how it  felt to be loved. Laid upon his chest, a need for warmth and a plea for him to survive, she became the closest thing that felt like Sarah in twenty years. How could Marlene expect him to walk away, to leave her in that hospital?
Pain rushes in like a wave meets the shore, dampening him in a melancholy he saves for whiskey. Still resting peacefully on the sofa, your chest rises slow, steady, and constant. He tries to mimic it, matching his own breathing to it. It reminds him of dancing with you in the kitchen, barefoot and bare chested, arms entangled and forehead pressed to forehead, doing his best to stay in sync with your gentle sways.
The floorboards creek the further his aching body sinks to the floor. Like a man meets the altar, he’s on his knees. Blunt fingernails dig into the worn out brown leather of the couch, the only grip he has on reality. 
A discombobulated memory dances across his mind. One of a much younger him, with a head full of brown locks and a sleeping daughter upon his couch. Outbreak night. He’d been peacefully unaware of the happenings outdoors, happy to turn another year older next to his Sarah, when a call came through. His brother, dumped in some jail-cell and begging for release. He’d not thought it through much, sighing in frustration yet rising slowly to his feet nonetheless. If he’d known how that night would end, he’d have held his daughter a little tighter as he carried her to bed, he’d have left every kiss he could afford against her forehead, and speak every I love you he had left in him.
Grief is a river that travels the mountain of his mind. Strong, cold, descending upon a downward slope. Its currents are unforgiving, grabbing a hold of anything that blocks the path. Too easy is it for him to slip and fall into the rapids, losing hold of his footing on reality before he realises he’s struggling to breath and there’s a whole new river carving a way for itself out his eyes and down his cheeks. 
His eyes close. His breath halts. He tries to remember those breathing exercises, the same ones he uses any time the pain swells too much and the panic begins to attack his nervous system. Deep breath in. Slow breath out. Deep breath in. Choke down a sob. Slow breath out. Joel. He pictures you, feet upon solid ground, hand stretched out as you try to goad him out the trepid waters of his grief. Joel. This image of you reminds him he’s got a name, got a life, got a purpose. To help Tommy on patrols. To make sure Ellie always has a place to call home. To keep you warm in the winter, and kissed during spring, and safe no matter where the sun may sit. Joel. The tears fall faster. Messier. He’s no longer a quiet companion at your side, but a mess of ragged breathing and nose sniffles. 
“Joel?”
Skin to skin. Soft hand to wet cheek. You’re awake faster than he can process, too quick to wipe tears or feign smiles. Legs scramble off the couch, parted and bent at the knee on either side of him. Musk, and lilies, and every scent that makes him feel safe and close to you envelop the shared space between you.
“Joel, baby, what’s wrong?” Your thumb swipes uselessly at his cheeks, fresh waves rolling out his eyes before you finish wiping the last. Sleep is written all over you, woven into your breathy voice and weighing down the bags of your eyes. He feels a whole new wave of guilt, waking you from such a peaceful slumber with the sight of him and all his ailments bursting out the frayed seams that hold him together.
He thinks he says your name. It’s hard to tell. The blurred image of you through his teary eyes inspires a heavy burden of disappointing you that he can not cope with, and so he ducks his head between your legs, forehead pressing on the inside of your left thigh. His breath is short, his heart is sore, and he’s staining your delicate skin with his pain. You let him grieve upon you, pull him closer. A hand soothes up his back. Your voice tells him it’s okay, and you hum a sweet tune he’s sure he’s played you many a drunken nights, when the confidence kicks in and he’s serenading you with his country twang and guitar strings.
There’s no prying, no demand to rightfully know why you’ve awoken to your lover, steadfast and stoic at his worst, collapsing into your hold. You let him cry. He lets you hold him. You’re all he’s been missing, this feeling of support he’s denied himself for far too long. No fear of your judgement, but fear of pulling you in amongst the dangerous currents alongside him. 
An anchor comes in the shape of your fingers carding through his unruly hair, a tether that pulls him back into the living room, into your home, into you. With the patience of any saint, you let him move at his own pace, head slowly rising from your thigh, back straightening to the best of its abilities. His hand, rough and hardened by time and grit and survival, paws at your thigh, clumsy in its attempts to dry his tears off of you, a fear of it sinking into your skin and some part of his sadness taking root inside your bloodstream.
Your hand stills his, gently, coercing his fingers to thread with your own as your other hand cups his face and guides him to look at you. You're beautiful, in a way that makes Joel wish he was better with words so he could spend the rest of his days finding new ways to tell you so. Instead, he has to settle with a simple, “my pretty girl.” You smile, bashful, as if that’s enough, as if you don’t deserve more.
“Hello to you too, handsome.” You peck his cheek, he chases after you with his mouth. Two small pecks, a third he fails to achieve as you hold him back. “Don’t think you can distract me with those perfect lips of yours, Miller. I’m worried about you, and no amount of kisses are gonna change that.”
He refocuses on his breathing exercises. Deep breath in. Slow breath out. Deep breath in. No sob this time. Slow breath out. Your gaze, soft as a cloud, rests over him gently, your own chest rising and falling in sync with him. With every night he’d lay awake, trying to think of how to bring up Sarah and the details of her he’s failing to hold onto, never did he imagine the weight to fly off his chest so easily with just a supportive smile from you.
“I had someone before, who I loved.” He pauses. Clears his throat, shifts his weight. His knees are beginning to ache the longer they sit digging into the hard floor. He should have listened to your advice of scavenging a rug. “Not how I love you. Like I love Ellie.”
Silence.
Not the kind where you hear a pin drop, but one that allows the laughter of children playing down the street to blow in with the breeze, and the creaking of the old house you’ve both made a home, and the squeaks and chirps of wild-life continuing on outside, unaffected by the end of civilisation.
Then, “I know.” Joel’s eyes widen, disbelief painted across them. “Tommy’s let it slip a few times. Just when we’re on patrol and he sees something that reminds him of her. Or he’s telling me a story that’s sole purpose is to embarrass you.” A part of him wants to feel angry at his younger brother, stealing his right to reveal such a large part of who he is. The other part of him feels for him too, a reminder that Sarah’s loss is not one he tackled all by himself. She was his daughter, but she was also Tommy’s niece. How could he blame him for feeling comfortable enough to share his grief with you? “Ellie also mentioned it, once. Back before you and I were really…” You fall silent, trail off, as you both usually do when faced with tackling the task of labelling what exists between you.
“Why,” he chooses to distract himself from it, scared of a world where he asks for the right to claim himself as your husband. Those things don’t matter anymore, with the world gone to shit, but a man could still dream. “Didn’t you say anything?”
“It’s your story to tell, I didn’t want to force it out you. I figured you’d tell me when you wanted to.”
He may not know how to label what you are to him, but he knows he loves you. God, does he love you.
“Thank you, darlin’, I really-” He’s getting choked up, caught between his grief for Sarah and his love for you. You seem to understand, as you always do, hands slowly pulling and coercing him up onto the sofa, occupying the space next to you. “Can’t thank you enough.”
“You’ve nothing to thank me for.” You promise, sealing it into his skin with a kiss to his cheek. “I don’t like to see you cry, Joel, but I prefer you do it in front of me. Don’t hide parts of yourself. I want all of you. Good, bad, and everything in between.”
There’s the urge to let himself fall into the river again, now that you’ve pulled him ashore and attached yourself to him like a life vest, an oath to never let him drown. He feels his eyes well-up, but doesn’t let them fall, as his mouth runs ahead of his mind and at last confesses the troubles he’s been keeping close to his chest.
“It used to be like this every day. Tears, unless I numbed myself free of consciousness. Then, things got better. With Ellie and you around. Anytime I felt the anger or the pain swelling, you’d be there and there’d be room for laughter. But I’m getting older, darlin’. Memories’ not the same. There’s things about my babygirl, my Sarah, that I just… can’t remember. And it scares me. Scares me so bad that I don’t know how to cope with it. If I ever woke up and couldn’t remember her face, it would kill me. I wouldn’t be able to go on.”
He speaks slowly. You cling to every word, a gentle nod lets him know you understand. A part of him wonders how deep that understanding runs, if you too had lost a child. He wants to afford you the same grace you’ve given in, and so he doesn’t pry. If you have a story to tell, he can only hope to still be around to listen.
Oblivious to the thoughts of you holding a faceless child swirling around in his head, you pull Joel into you, encouraging him to let you hold his frame. You’ve told him countless times he needs to let himself be cared for, a spark that ignited many  arguments in the early days of your love. It feels nice to comply at last, head drifting down to rest on your steady shoulder. Your legs curl up onto the couch, lay gently over his own, as an arm wraps itself around his aching back.
Only like this does Joel feel he’s finally arrived home after weeks of wading through the depths of his own sorrows, evading a bounty placed upon him by time.
Joel is ageing. Everyday, a new line appears on his face. Every year, a new ache burrows in his bones. But, if each moment he can feel your love in acts of kindness, and left-over meals, and sleepy limbs upon a shared mattress, it doesn’t feel as daunting. He wonders what awaits him in the afterlife, when he and Sarah reunite as he so hopes. He doesn’t doubt for a moment that she’d be proud of him for finding solace in a heart like yours.
“Tell me about her.” You plead to him something he’s spent years longing to do.
Without missing a beat, words flow easily and memories play on in his head, his precious daughter no longer blurry in a haze, but fully in focus, smiling wide at him with a mouthful of food.
“She loved pancakes.”
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stevesbipanic · 4 months
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To my most lovely @undreaming-fanfiction Happy Valentine's Day love youuuu 💕💕💕 I hope I managed to do all three of your prompts justice (small routines, learning new things about each other, and ghosts of your past) ENJOY!!!!! And Ty @artbean for putting this together 💕💕💕
After five years together there's not a lot of things Eddie doesn't know about Steve.
He knows that Steve likes to colour co-ordinate the calendar on their fridge and that his favourite day of the month is the first since he gets to write out everything on a clean slate.
He also knows that Steve has a particular way he does his hair, and that it was a big deal just seeing it done let alone being taught how to do it, it helps he now knows Steve loves a good head scratch.
He knows that Steve is an early riser and always goes on a run, but will shower and curl back in bed with him if Eddie is still asleep.
He knows that there's an order to how and when he checks on their family. The Sinclairs are first, making sure he's waited until Lucas should be back from training and Erica back from Tracey's, calling there too if there's a sleepover. Next is the Wheelers, Nancy promising him they're all ok if they're visiting and Mike letting him know if she's available that night if she's at college. Then the Hendersons, Claudia inviting him to dinner in the background as Dustin regales his day. Max is next, letting Steve know if she wants to stay over that night. The Byers are the end of the kids, El and Will promising him it's really over. Wayne is near the end, back from his shift safe and sound. Before they dated Eddie was during this time too, helping him to sleep just hearing Steve's voice. Robin is last and she'll be on the line until they're both safely in dreamland.
Eddie loves learning new things about Steve, especially when now they're further and far between. It comes as a suprise when it's something as simple as tea that teaches him something new about his sweetheart.
They're visiting Steve's grandma, who was a lot cooler about the whole boyfriend thing than Steve's parents were.
"Your grandpa, Otis, had a friend, Freddie, who kept a picture of his boy in his pocket, would've gotten him in a lot of trouble back then but love like that was worth dying for."
She had been I'll lately so him and Steve had taken a drive up to visit her, now living in a retirement home in Indy. She was a riot in Eddie's opinion, and made a mental note to make sure they visited her more, he was happy to drive them, anything for Steve.
They were halfway through a game of Scrabble, where Eddie had successfully convinced Steve that Megadeth should be allowed (it shouldn't), when the question was raised.
Edith, yes Eddie also got a delight out of the fact that they shared a name, buzzed her nurse who popped her head in knowing there were visitors.
"Everything good, Eds?" Eddie's eyes twinkled in mischief, he was teasing Steve about the name similarities when they got home.
"A spot of tea, darling? I'm parched and I'm sure these lovely boys are too. Steve, sweetheart?"
"Oh yes, milk and two sugars please, but cubes on the side instead of scoops of it's not trouble."
Eddie's heart skipped a beat at his answer, "Eddie, you want a tea?"
"Oh um, yes, same as him, please ma'am."
"Such polite boys, we need more grandsons like you visiting," she laughed leaving to make the tea. It was surely just a coincidence that Steve took his tea like that, he's sure plenty of people do.
The real suprise came when the tea was set down, cubes on the side, and Steve picked one up and mixed it in, leaving the other alone. The game continued, Eddie eyeing that lone cube, a similar one on his own saucer. When Steve took his last sip of tea he picked up the cube and popped it into his mouth, crunching it. Eddie did the same.
"Done that since you were a kid, always a sweet tooth."
Steve laughed, "It's how my nanny did it when we played tea party with Carol."
Edith smiled, "She was a lovely woman, shamed they moved outta town."
Something settled deep in Eddie's heart. The rest of the afternoon it sat there, and through the goodbyes and hugs, all through the drive home too.
Eddie didn't mention it as they made dinner, Steve doing the chopping and as always Eddie dutifully stirring. The feeling sat there through the night as they watched tv, curled up in a blanket built for one not two. Nothing was brought up as they cleaned up, Steve washing, Eddie drying. It wasn't until bed, in the safety and quiet of their room that Eddie asked.
"Your nanny? What was she like?"
Steve's eyes lit up, "Oh she was the best, noone as good before her and no-one as good after. She loved taking me to the park, sometimes if his dad said it was ok her son would come too, he was fun, built the best sandcastles. She always baked me cookies too, especially if Carol was coming over for a tea party. And she would tell me the little extra sugar was a treat and that I should always have something a little sweet in life."
Eddie's eyes were tearing up by the time Steve finished, "Eds, baby are you ok?"
"What was her name?"
Steve's eyebrows crinkled, "Sarah, why? Oh." He said, remembering the dark curls that surrounded her face, the ones on her son, the boy laying across from him.
"Your mum, oh Eds, so when the tea? I'm sorry." Steve knew about his mum and how when she died it left Eddie all alone.
"Can't believe in five years, we've never had tea," a wet chuckle followed Eddie's words.
A sad smile graced Steve's face, "We should have more, need a bit more sweetness in my life."
Eddie smiled at him, "Knew there was a reason I called you sweetheart, and I clearly won you over with my awesome sandcastles."
A laugh burst out of Steve and that sound was sweeter than any sugar Eddie could eat.
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I APOLOGIZE IF ITS A LITTLE TOO MUCH, JUST A LITTLE TOO SOON
kirishima x reader
thoughts on how kirishima acts in a relationship
lovey dovey stuff, teenagers suck but love is an experience
a/n: i need 17 more songs that sound and feel exactly like so american ♥️ GUTS i’ll always love u
a/n: falling in love is the best healing feeling and also hell on earth simultaneously
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eijiro kirishima, who texts you goodmorning and goodnight religiously. you're the first person he wants to talk to in the morning and the last person he wants to hear from before he drifts off. his face turns almost as red as his hair and eyes whenever his phone lights up with a buzz, seeing that you've replied to him. he saves your contact with a <3 right next to your name. your photo is a picture he snapped of you wearing one of his tank tops, sitting loosely on you. normally his sculptured biceps fill out the fabric to the brim, but he prefers the way you wear it. he wants to stare at you every time he picks up the phone in the morning to text you.
eijiro kirishima, who lets you help him dye his hair after the third time you insist on it. he feels a slight hint of embarrassment, thinking its un-manly to need help with a simple task, but after the first couple of rounds he insists on you doing it. he loves the way your fingers weave delicately through his hair, touching up his roots and treating him like he’s a glass sculpture. and afterwards while he waits for it to set he’ll help you with menial tasks in return- like finishing your algebra (not that he’s any better, but he means well) or making you a quick dinner. he’s an expert when it comes to self-care, and knows that working out and eating well isn’t healthy if its not accompanied by nourishing your happiness. he knows what candy’s to bring to pick up for you while he’s purchasing his dye, what movies to play in the background while he’s letting his hair soak, and exactly how to hug you when it’s all done.
eijiro kirishima, who becomes a sucker for sappy love songs once you get him introduced to it. at first, he hums along to your playlist in the car. then he’s following the artists you like on instagram and keeping up with their recent music. then it’s actively going out of his way to listen to them because each line about love and longing is about you. he makes a playlist titled [y/n] <3 and its all the songs that have made you come up in his head. little do his gym friends know that he’s streaming the tortured poets department while he’s lifting weights DOWN BAD CRYING AT THE GYM ANYONE
eijiro kirishima, who absolutely loves anything you create. muffins, bread, brownies- you’ve suddenly tested his willpower when it comes to his rigid diet. but he can’t help himself- everything tastes better when he knows you’ve put the time and effort into it. with so many eyes watching the young hero, he often forgets to properly feed himself- which is when you come in, always reminding him to eat. when he’s not looking, you’ll slip an extra treat or two in his bag, and come home greeted with a hug and kiss of gratitude for keeping his tummy full.
eijiro kirishima, who comes to you seeking refuge from his insecurities. he has quirk envy badly, sometimes just staring at the heroes he sees around him and wonders how he could ever live up to them. he feels as though he pails in comparison, not knowing how to articulate his worries into words. sometimes he’ll simply hug you, resting his chiseled chin on your shoulder while a huff escapes his lips. he doesn’t need to say anything because you know him. you know how he gets in his head. so you kiss his temples and remind him that he is exactly how he should be. that he’s enough. enough to be strong. enough to be a great hero. enough to be the red riot you love so much. he’s enough for you. and thats what plants are smile on his face as he leans in to kiss you. it’s enough for him too.
eijiro kirishima, who loves showing you off at the gym. mostly to his friends, who comment on how he seemingly never shuts up about you- but a part of him finds pride in the jealous stares others give him. he almost wants to give them a look of ‘i know, right?’ while they admire your beauty, the way you look when sweat ripples down your skin and your cheeks are flushed pink. but he feels sorry for them. sorry that they can’t have you they he’s got you. his eyes sparkle when he sees you pushing yourself, feeling inspired that he now has someone to be so proud of. he’s always proud of you.
eijiro kirishima, who worries he’ll mess it up with you. that it’s all too good to be true- that theres no way he got so lucky so young. he worries you’ll grow bored, tired, or sick of him. he worries you aren’t as in love with him as he is with you. because eijiro kirishima is so, so in love with you. he knows this is love because he sees more than just a high-school fling, he sees the future. he sees someone he will always run to with open arms. and when you kiss him back, arms wrapped around him in a tender embrace, he gets the feeling that you’re so in love with him, too.
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crushmeeren · 7 months
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Bakugou/Fem Reader/Kirishima
Everyone involved in this fic is aged up/18+; continue scrolling or block if you’re not into this
Warnings; fluff & smut, reader is 6 months pregnant, cursing, pussy eating (Katsuki is a champ at eating pussy), blowjobs (deep throating, M/M & F/M), pregnant vaginal sex (Eijirou has a filthy deep stroke), squirting, dirty talk (Katsuki has a nasty mouth), cream pie, katsuki paints your tits with cum
Word Count; 8k
AO3 Link; Back Aches
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Eternally uncomfortable. Way too sweaty. Belly stretched into the shape of a medium sized watermelon, because hell, it sure feels like you’re carrying one around 24/7. These are only a few phrases you would use to describe the way it feels to be 6 months pregnant with Katsuki’s baby. Today however, you seem to be really struggling with all the lovely side effects that come along with it.
Specifically, your lower back. It’s been twinging horridly whenever you take so much as one step. So you’ve set up camp on your large, fuzzy couch. Cozy blankets covering your bare legs. You’re only wearing soft shorts and a large, worn, Red Riot T-shirt. You’ve been out here for a while, aimlessly watching different movies and shows, scrolling through your phone.
Katsuki’s playing some video game in the other room. Quite loudly, you might add. You can occasionally hear him yell at Todoroki that he’s the worst player in existence and to fuck off, venomously. You hope Todoroki is taunting him just as much. Sadly, Eijirou is out on patrol today, not coming home until later in the evening.
Now, the sun is getting close to setting, and you’re in the middle of watching a Tik Tok when your baby starts to wiggle around. The fluttering sensation makes you squirm and sit up ram-rod straight. Which in turn, causes a bright flash of pain to radiate through your lower back, up your spine. You desperately need some sort of relief, so you set your phone down on the armrest.
“Kastukiiiii,” you whine loudly, dragging out the i, wishing you could summon the blonde telepathically. You shift your weight in the seat, keeping your feet perched on the large ottoman in front of you. You wait a few seconds, hearing nothing except the background noise from the movie you’ve left on. What the fuck, you think.
“Katsuki!” You yell this time, his name falling sharply from your tongue. Your eyes widen significantly as you suck in a sharp breath through your teeth. You rest a hand on the lower part of your belly, rubbing the spot soothingly when you feel a tiny foot kick you harshly. Apparently she does not want you to yell. Yeah, your daughter is certainly going to have Katsukis bad attitude.
“Baby, I heard you! I’m coming,” Katsuki yells back, tone slightly irritated. You huff, cheeks puffing and heating as your easily agitated temper flares a bit in response. You take a deep breath, both hands now placed on either side of your stomach as the tiny feet continue to try and burst out of your skin. Like a scene from fucking Alien.
Your attention turns to Katsuki, when you hear the blondes soft footsteps as he rounds the corner into your living room. Your eyebrows pinch, lips turning downwards. He comes to a stop next to your legs, eyebrow arching as he crosses his arms over his chest. He pointedly says nothing and waits for your request.
“Kat, love of my life- baby daddy, can you do the thing please? My back hurts.” Pouting up at him, you openly appreciate his slender frame, despite your discomfort. It doesn’t help that he’s only clad in mid thigh length black sweat shorts and a black tank top. It gives you access to the lean muscles of his shoulders. Motherf-He’s so fucking hot. He notices your wondering eyes, rolling his own when you call him baby daddy, he hates that. Nevertheless, his facial expression is soft when he gazes at you.
“Do you think you can wait five minutes while I finish this round of my game? I’m about to kick Icy Hot’s ass,” he says, smirking when he places his hands on his hips. You know the unwarranted spark of anger you feel is not fair to him, but you can’t help it. You sit up a little straighter, wincing when your back cramps again.
“That’s too long,” you groan dramatically. “Can’t you kick his ass later?” you whine, over exaggerating your movements as you run your hands up to the top of your baby bump. Katsuki is more than amused at your behavior, finding it unbearably adorable at how much you want him to be in here with you. He smiles, snickering softly. You glare playfully at him.
“It’s five minutes sweetheart, Todoroki fucking sucks at this game.” Laughing, Katsuki runs a hand up and through his spiky hair.
“It’s your fault I’m like this Katsuki,” you complain. You press a hand to your forehead as if you might faint if he doesn’t do what you want right this second. His head tilts back in another laugh.
“Oi! You know it takes two people to make a baby right? I’m not the only guilty party,” he retorts. “Why isn’t Eijirou getting any blame for this huh? He was there too! Maybe you should get him to hold your belly,” Katsuki teases, ultimately giving in to your request. Todoroki be damned. Katsuki pushes the ottoman flush against the couch so you can scoot forward, making space for him behind you.
“He’s not home right now,” you pout. “Eiji’s actually nice to me, he would help his pregnant wife,” you joke, getting comfortable. The blonde crawls on to the cushions, maneuvering until he sits in the space between you and the backrest. He’s got a thigh bracketing both your hips and you recline into his chest.
“Should’ve let red get you pregnant first then,” he murmurs, stretching his legs out, pinning your blanket under his thighs. You smack his thigh in retaliation, making him jolt.
“Oh god, kitten, wanna see you swollen with my baby so bad, blah blah, I’m Katsuki and I’m a giant fucking hypocrite,” you mock, in a high pitched, horrific imitation of his voice. To be fair he did whine those things to you and Eijirou in bed multiple times before you all agreed to it. Katsuki sputters behind you, feeling his face burn as he pinches the soft flesh of your thigh.
“Oi! You’re such a fucking terror!” he says, voice colored in laughter. “I should make you wait until Eijirou gets home,” he taunts, slipping his hands beneath your shirt. His palms are so warm, comforting, when he places them on the underside of your belly, fingers spread. Katsuki gently presses upwards. You melt into his chest, letting out a soft moan of pleasure, relief immediate as he takes the pressure off your back.
“Your actions say otherwise,” you reply smugly, resting your hands over his. He hums in agreement. Katsuki loves holding your belly. He’s always hoping he’ll be lucky enough to feel his daughter kicking. He kisses the back of your head, relaxing into the backrest as he holds you, feeling the flex in his biceps. You both turn your attention to the movie you had playing earlier, your eyelids starting to flutter every now and then, feeling gooey and warm. Like a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie.
Your baby must have recognized her daddys voice. It’s not even 10 minutes later, when the blonde makes a snarky comment about the current scene on screen, she’s playing kick ball again. Directly into Katsukis hands. You giggle when he gasps, accidentally releasing his hold on your belly.
“Holy shit,” he breathes, in awe. He presses the pads of his fingertips into the same spot, trying to get her to hit him again. His heart thumps hard, excitement swirling around in his chest, when she responds, kicking him once more.
“She’s been really active today. She must have heard you talking.” You smile softly, placing your hands on top of your stomach, letting him have full range to feel below. “I hope she’s this way when Eijirou gets home. I know he was upset last time he missed it,” you remark, tilting your head where it lays on the blondes chest, trying to get a look at his face. He’s still staring at your belly when he speaks.
“She’s fiesty,” he coos, rubbing soothing cirlces into your skin when she kicks him once more. “She’ll respond to him, she loves him,” he murmurs lowly, genuine smile tugging on his lips. The amount of love you’re feeling bubbles up to the brim in your chest, spilling over at his actions. You surge up, lips brushing his jaw swiftly in a sweet kiss, before turning back to the movie. He lets out a soft sound of surprise.
“I love you too,” he teases, kissing your temple. You hum contentedly, and Katsuki goes back to holding up your belly. You feel a vibration near your leg recognizing the pattern as a text. Picking it up, you see it’s from Eijirou. Your face lights up instantly.
“Kat, Eiji messaged that he’s gonna be home soon,” you tell him, eager to see the red head.
“Bout fucking time, my arms are gonna fall off,” he rasps, teasing as he runs his thumbs over the smooth skin of your belly. It tickles.
“Get out from behind me then, ya dick,” you laugh, gently removing his hands, back feeling significantly better. He softly tickles your ribs in retaliation, making you squeal with laughter. You’re wiggling in his grip. “You’re lucky I can’t get up quickly right now Katsuki! I’d kick your ass, you shitty excuse for a bomb!” Your voice high pitched, blushing to the tips of your ears. Katsuki stops, gasping in fake offense, wrapping his arms around your shoulders.
“Shitty excuse for a bomb??” He sounds incredulous, but unbelievably entertained. You nod, unable to hold in a giggle. He squeezes you tight and plants several quick kisses on your cheek. You turn your head the best you can, briefly snagging his lips with your own.
You’re only able to hold your neck at the uncomfortable angle for a second. The sound of your front door opening makes both your heads turn, watching Eijirou waltz through. He’s wearing a smile, bright as the sun. All his sharp teeth on display. The red head melts into a pile of warm mush when he spots the two of you snuggling on the couch.
“What a sweet sight to come home too,” Eijirou happily sighs, bouncing on the balls of his feet. “All three of my babies snuggling on the couch,” he coos, walking around the side, coming to a stop next to the ottoman. He’s in street clothes. Gray sweats, red tee and a white bandana tied around his head. Per usual, he looks like he may bust out of the shirt he’s wearing. It’s unbearably hot.
“Get lost on the way home red?” Katsuki teases, smirking and raising his eyebrow. The blonde lets go of your shoulders as you strain to sit up. You struggle trying to brace your feet on the ottoman, Katsuki notices. He brings his feet up and pushes the furniture away for you. Making space for the red head. Grin never leaving his face, Eijirou rolls his eyes playfully, shoving the foot rest further away so he can fully get in front of you.
“No, I’m actually home earlier than I thought I would be,” he replies, pausing to kneel in between your spread legs, since your feet have come to rest on the floor. Katsuki slips out from behind you, sitting next to you instead.
“Thank God,” you sigh. “Apparently Kat isn’t strong enough to hold our 5lb baby without his arms falling off.” Straight faced, you explain to Eijirou, trying extremely hard not to smile. Katsuki growls next to you. You can practically hear his teeth grind together as Eijirous bright laughter fills the air. You know you’re poking the bear, but sometimes he’s just too easy to rile up.
“Is that so?” Eijirou teases, looking at the blonde as he grips the edge of your T-shirt. Eijirou notices your red riot shirt, looking up to wink at you. Cheeks turning red, you watch the red head push it up over your belly until it rests on top. Exposing all your smooth skin.
“I can hold a fucking five pound baby!” Katsuki snarls, harmless, yet he still dramatically throws his hands up. You choke on the swell of laughter that threatens to tear out your throat. Hearing Eijirou snickering as the red haired man settles both his large hands on your belly, fingers spread wide. His hands are so fucking warm. You let out a soft groan, weaving your fingers through Eijirous soft hair.
“I know Kat, just teasing,” you laugh, giving him your softest smile. The blonde can only hang on to his scowl for a moment, before the corners of his mouth curve upwards in what resembles a smile.
“How’s she been today?” Eijirou questions softly, nuzzling his nose near the top of your belly.
“Feisty little shit,” Katsuki croons. The blonde is smirking now, chest puffing up a bit. He’s definitely proud of it.
“Just like her daddy then?” Eijirou teases, brushing his lips over your belly in a sweet kiss. A soft giggle leaves your mouth.
“Absolutely,” Katsuki says, with complete certainty and confidence. Eijirou laughs.
“She’s been moving a lot today Eiji. Kat’s just happy she kicked the shit out of him earlier,” you explain, scratching the red heads scalp softly. The blonde makes a protesting sound but Eijirou hums, speaking to your baby girl now.
“Hi my feisty girl, daddy Eiji’s home,” he purrs. “I heard you were trying to kick box with daddy Kat. You’re gonna be just like him,” he whispers, affection falling off his tongue. He rubs his thumbs back and forth, caressing your soft, silky skin. Eijirous heart swells up to the point of bursting. Warm love oozing out of him when he places another sweet kiss above your belly button. The red heads eyes flutter closed, resting his forehead against you for a moment.
You jerk in surprise when Eijirous head suddenly shoots up, narrowly avoiding head butting the shit out of you, looking at you with wide, bright eyes. Your daughter has rewarded his affections with two thumps right where his head had been resting. The red head looks up, gaze tracking between you and Katsuki with stars in his eyes. He’s almost vibrating with excitement.
“Did you feel that baby? Oh my god! Kat, she heard me!” The red head yells, almost tripping over his words. You nod, cheeks hurting from smiling so wide. You tug on his soft strands between your fingers. When his gaze locks with yours, you’re overwhelmed by the sight in front of you. Up to your eyeballs in the amount of love you’re feeling for your little family.
“Dammit Eijirou,” Katsuki growls, crossing his arms. “Stop being so-,” he pauses. “So fucking cute!” You laugh as the blonde crosses his arms, lip curled. You chance a look at his face. The blonde is flushed red up to his hairline. A sly expression immediately takes over Eijirous face.
He slips your shirt back down over your belly and you let go of his hair. You meet him halfway when he leans up to kiss you briefly. For being made of rock half the time, his lips are also so soft against yours. Your tongue pokes out to wet your lower lip, warmth burning through you when he pulls away.
The red head shuffles on his knees until he’s between Katsukis thighs. He leans forward and wraps his arms around the blondes waist, wiggling his eyebrows up at him. Katsuki narrows his eyes but places his elbows on Eijirous shoulders. Your toes curl into the plush rug below as the red head smoothes his hands up and down the blondes sides before squishing his face into Katsukis chest. Hugging him close, his tight embrace pushes the air out of the blondes lungs.
“Eijirou.” It comes out of Katsuki in a squeaky, gravelly tone.
“You’re so sweet Katsuki, I think you’re cute too,” he purrs, muffled by the material of a black tank top. Eijirou breathes in deeply, taking in just how good the blonde smells. Feeling the warmth of his chest on his face. You’re starting to flush as the blonde wrap his arms around Eijirous neck, holding him tight, mumbling I love you under his breath. Watching them together also sparks a fire inside of you. Even if it’s just something as tame as hugging.
The intense pulse of fondness you feel at their embrace, squeezes pleasantly in your chest. It’s a picturesque moment, until a pang of hunger rolls around inside you. Placing a hand on the underside of your belly, you chew your bottom lip. Not wanting to break up the tender moment, but it seems your daughter is hungry.
“I hate to burst the bubble, but our daughter is starving,” you tease gently, grinning as you watch them part. Eijirou kisses Katsuki sweetly, making a loud smooching sound when he pulls away, before the blonde stands up. He pushes playfully at the red heads shoulder when Eijirou rises from the floor as well. “Will you make something Kat?” You ask, puffing out your lower lip. Usual smirk etched onto his face as he lets out a scoff.
“I swear, you and Eijirou are like bottomless fucking pits,” he grumbles, turning and making his way to the kitchen. He’s not fooling anyone, you all know he actually loves cooking for everyone. Especially now that your daughter is getting closer to being born. He likes to express his love through his food. You and the red head share a look, laughing as the large man flops down onto the couch with you. It jostles you a little bit.
“Thank you Kit Kat! Love you,” you coo, watching as he throws a hand up over his shoulder in response.
“Sooo, can I hold your belly now?” Eijirou prods, way too excited for something so mundane. One of your eyebrows lifts as he shifts around until he can lean his back against the armrest. Planting one foot on the couch, letting his knee rest on the back side of the cushion. He lets the other dangle to the floor, opening his arms, making a grabby motion.
“You don’t have to ask me twice. She definitely has been missing her other daddy today,” you joke, picking up your discarded blanket from the couch, slotting yourself into his embrace. He lets one leg be pinned between you and the cushion as you get comfortable, pulling up the blanket over both of you, relaxing into his thick chest. Eijirou plants his hands on the top of your belly, slowly sliding them down to the bottom of your shirt.
“I love your shirt, pretty girl,” he whispers, low and sweet in your ear, soft lips pressing on your neck, snaking his hands under the soft material. The combination sends hot tingles down your spine. He forces a tiny, shocked moan out of you when he sinks his sharp teeth into your shoulder, spreading his fingers and lifting up your belly. He brushes his lips over the bite.
“Jesus Eijirou,” you breathe, placing your hands on his. The low heat pooling in your belly is very enticing. “Trying to fuck me on the couch?” You shift, feeling his cock is half hard. Fuck, you’d be a damn liar if you said that didn’t send a sharp flash of arousal straight to your pussy. His laugh tickles your neck.
“Maybe,” he says, sly voice tickling your ear. Pressing his hips upwards a little, he runs his cock over your lower back. You pinch his thigh. He groans softly. “I can’t help it pretty baby,” Eijirou whines, continuing to hold your belly. You can’t say you aren’t extremely tempted, it’s just- you are really hungry.
“After we eat, promise Eiji. I’m sure Kat will be up for it,” you murmur, trailing your fingers gently over his forearm. You can physically feel the red heads pout, but he hums in agreement, more than likely not wanting to bother Katsuki while he cooks. Which is smart. You wrestle with your own arousal as you let Eijirou hold you, and talk about his day. All the way until Katsuki calls out for you both to get your asses in the kitchen.
🍓💥🍓💥
You were right. Katsuki immediately flushed red, when you casually mentioned wanting to get fucked, once you all had finished eating. The blonde had you and Eijirou ushered into the bedroom no more than five minutes later. You’re completely naked now, elbows resting on the headboard behind you. They ache a bit as you strain to hold up your weight, bone at the inner corner digging into the wooden frame.
Your thighs are bracketing Katsukis head in a harsh grip, knees sinking into the mattress below. The sensitive skin of your inner thighs being tickled by the blondes barely there stubble while you sit on his face. His mouth buried in your pussy. He’s got you sitting backwards, so you can enjoy the view of Eijirou swallowing the blondes cock over and over as he lays on his belly between spread legs.
“Fff-uck, Kat,” you whimper, rolling your hips so your pussy slides slickly over his lips. The blonde has one arm snaked around your thigh, his other hand braced gently on your belly, thumb absentmindedly rubbing back and forth. A gasp tears from your chest. Hot shivers sluggishly traveling up your spine when his tongue slips up through your folds, moving up to circle around your clit.
God, you’re so wet, eyes fluttering shut when he sucks on your sensitive bud. He flicks the tip of his tongue up and down as he continues to suck. The pleasure is searing. Not helped by the sinful, wet schlicking sounds that are coming from Eijirous mouth. He’s so enthusiastic at giving head.
Your eyes shoot open, jaw dropping as your fingers curl into fists, elbows still braced uncomfortably on the headboard. Katsuki is humming against your pussy, moving his head side to side, tongue barely poking out to hit your clit with each pass.
The vibrations resonate through your pelvis and the change in direction is enough to make the muscles in your lower belly clench tight. Thick, warm sensation of an orgasm starting to curl up behind your belly button. You whimper when he switches back to licking firm stripes into your clit.
You know your cheeks are a soft peachy color, eyes drooping when your gaze connects with the red head. A zap of electricity races through you at the sight of his pretty lips stretched tight around Katsukis cock, cheeks blooming a sweet shade of pink. It’s unbelievably erotic, the way his fingers grip the thick flesh on the underside of Katsukis thigh.
His other hand rolls the blondes balls. Katsuki has his knees bent, feet planted. The red head fits perfectly between his legs, snug between slender thighs. Katsuki shallowly thrusts his hips upwards, like he can’t help himself because it just feels too good. Eijirou dips his head in time with each motion, taking his cock completely, easily. His lips kissing curly blonde hair at the base of Katsukis cock each time.
Your pussy throbs over Katsukis lips when Eijirou sends a wink your way. Your pulse kicks, as you start to pant, tongue flicking out to wet your bottom lip. A yelp rings out from you when Katsuki secures both arms around your thighs, pulling your pussy further into his mouth. He starts alternating between licking firm stripes into your clit and sucking on it with his tongue.
It makes your hole clench around nothing, insides twisting, as you feel your slick coating the blondes chin and mouth. It’s too good. You may not cum like this, but you’re getting as close to the edge as you can be. Your eyes flutter, catching on the way the blondes belly is twitching.
His muscles are starting to clench, stomach rolling and folding periodically. It’s an obvious sign he’s getting close to bursting down the red heads throat. You know you want to get Eijirou more involved before that happens. After all, it was originally his idea to have sex tonight.
“Kat,” you whine, cutting yourself off with a groan. Your fingers wrap like bracelets around the bones of his wrists. “Wanna switch, baby, please,” you gasp, as he bites your clit gently, before patting the side of your ass twice, pushing you up from his mouth. You hover over his mouth for a moment, trying to get your bearings about you again.
Eijirou stops as well, pulling off with pop, letting the blondes, thick, glistening cock slap wetly against his pelvis. Blonde curls at the base of his cock taking the brunt of the saliva and precum that had accumulated. The red head sits up on his knees, hair starting to fall around his eyes from its original style. His cock is flushed, hard, as he wraps a hand around the base. Contact making warmth bubble in his belly.
“Whaddaya want pretty thing? Tell me, you know Eijirou and I will give it to ya,” Katsuki purrs, lips brushing over your slick folds as he speaks. Eijirou hums in agreement. You squirm, peering into the red heads eyes as you make a decision. Hands coming to rest on your belly out of habit. Eijirou wiggles his eyebrows at you. The action forcing you to smile.
“I want Eiji to position us how he wants. Since he’s been so horny all day today,” you tease, chest rising and falling as you, with difficulty, swing your leg from Katsukis head, settling back on your calves next to him. Elbows aching from holding your weight, you stretch them out in front of you. Eijirou turns as red as his hair, looking back and forth between you and the blonde, who has also sat up. Leaning back, weight resting on his hands.
“Oh,” Eijirou breathes, looking at the blondes chin, wet with saliva and slick from your pussy. He wants to lick it clean. His cock twitches harshly in his grip, thinking about what he wants. “Yes! I mean- yeah, totally I can do that,” he says, failing to hide how eager he is. The red head takes time to look between both of you. Katsuki snorts, waving a hand in front of himself. Vaguely inquiring how Eijirou wants them.
“Well red, how do you want us?” He coos, a sharp edge to his tone. Teasing, but mean. In a way that he knows will crawl under the other heroes skin. As well as yours. Eijirou rolls his jaw around a couple times before biting his bottom lip. You lightly punch Katsuki in the shoulder for his attitude. All he gives you is a smug look from the corner of his eye.
“Okay, pretty baby c’mere,” he speaks warmly, reaching a hand out to you. You do as told, grabbing his fingers as he helps you shuffle forward on your knees. Once you get to him, he helps you twist until your back faces the edge of the bed.
He grips both your hands until he can slowly recline you, back flat on the mattress, head hanging off the edge of the bed. You feel a bit like you’re suffocating, baby sort of crushing your lunngs, but it’s comfortable enough. You’re still a bit unsure of what the red head has in mind until he speaks.
“Alright Kat, go stand near her head. I wanna watch you fuck her throat while I fuck her pussy,” he says shyly, flush traveling down his chest as he traps the tip of his tongue between his teeth. He sits in between your spread thighs.
“Didn’t feel like getting your ass torn up today Eijirou?” Katsuki remarks, condescendingly. You raise your head up in time to see Eijirou stick his tongue out at the blonde, watching Katsuki slide off the bed. Lazily making his way towards you.
“Shut up,” Eijirou mumbles, helping you bend your knees and plant your feet. His blush has traveled up to the tips of his ears. You can’t help it, you laugh along with Katsuki at your sweet red heads embarrassment.
To be fair, he does turn into a drooling, blissed out mess everytime he’s fucked by the blonde. Katsuki reaches you, placing a palm under your head to support your neck. Your throat is dry when you swallow. Katsukis cock is right next to your cheek, looking every bit of flushed and thick. Your pussy throbs in anticipation when you think about the position you’re in.
“You okay with this sweetheart?” Katsuki purrs, intense ruby eyes looking into yours. You fucking flush again, forehead starting to sweat. The room feels sweltering, but you nod up at him either way.
“Yeah, I’ll be fine Kat. I’ll tap your thigh if it’s too much,” you dreamily sigh, as he lets your head fall, base of your skull resting on the edge of the mattress.
“Such a good fucking girl, already knows the rules,” the blonde coos, a rumble in his chest. He grips the base of his cock with one hand, running his slick tip over your lips. You whimper, tongue darting out to barely lick at his head. He hisses.
“Eiji, go ahead love, I’m ready,” you whine, desperate. Wiggling when the red head places a calloused thumb on your slippery clit, rubbing circles into it.
“You’re so fucking wet pretty girl,” Eijirou murmurs, thumb trailing through your folds. He grips his own cock, sliding his tip over your clit, down to your entrance, slowly pressing the head into your pussy. He leaves his other hand braced on your knee for now. A moan gets stuck in your throat, hands gripping the blanket below you tightly. Soft material bunching up under your damp palms. Eijirou is fucking thick.
“Fuck, that’s it. Let that tight little pussy swallow Eijirou whole,” Katsuki breathes, fisting his own cock as he watches Eijirou fill you out. You whine loudly, pussy stretched to the max. The way his cock pushes at your walls, the friction as he pulls back, then rocks in again, teasingly.
It makes your eyes roll back, pleasure blistering through your veins. Eijirou feels his stomach tighten, watching as your silky, slick pussy hugs him just right. His cock throbs once as he starts a slow rhythm.
“Oh, oh god, pussy so perfect f’me,” Eijirou whines, one hand coming to rest on the underside of your knee, the other he places sweetly on your swollen belly. You can’t see anything besides Katsukis thighs, but Eijirous words burn pleasurably in your brain, pushing a low moan out of you.
“Fucking christ, open up that mouth for me sweet thing,” Katsuki growls, speaking directly to you. A little lost in the bliss Eijirou is giving you, you just nod, letting your mouth drop open, pink tongue poking out as well. Katsuki brings up one leg, bracing his knee on the bed, other one standing firm, muscles in his thighs flexing. A syrupy heat swirls in the blondes gut, groin tightening in excitement.
He braces a hand on the bed and grips the round flesh of your tit with his other. As he guides his cock into your mouth, your soft pallet becomes a track for him to fuck against. Instinctively, you wrap your lips around the middle of his shaft, sucking as he curses, hips jerking forward a little until his tip hits the back of your mouth. You groan around him when Eijirou snaps his hips harshly by accident, the image of the Katsukis cock in your throat spurring him on.
“Motherfucker,” the blonde chokes out, starting to pump his cock in and out of your tight, hot mouth. Electric tingles start in his groin, flaring down to his toes as you suck on him every so often. You’ve relaxed your throat, but struggle to breathe through your nose as he fucks your mouth. He’s not moving too hard, but a dull ache starts up in the muscle of your jaw. You need something to anchor yourself with, so you secure your arms around the blondes thighs.
Eijirou can’t control the little whines that keep spilling from his lips. The way your tits bounce, the sensation of your belly moving under his palm, he thinks it’s so fucking hot. He pushes your thigh back to get his dick deeper into your pussy. He can’t pull his eyes away from the rolling motion of Katsukis slow, deep thrusts into your mouth.
The way his abs flex. The sweat trailing down the side of his face, over his jaw, onto the corded muscle of his neck. God, Eijirou wants to lick it off. The thought sparks his arousal even more and he thrusts forward harshly, curling his hips. He hears your muffled wail, realizing he must’ve hit your sweet spot. He keeps going.
“Fuck, pretty girl, ah-shit, right there yeah? S’good, feels too good,” Eijirou moans, bullying that spot inside you. You whine, the lightening like heat radiates in waves from your pussy to your toes every time.
Katsuki moans continuously, a gravelly edge to them. The blonde feels himself throbbing in your mouth, pulling back to let you breathe. You gasp, lungs burning for air as he squeezes your tit once more, pinching the nipple, before letting go. He pets your throat in a soothing motion as your bounced a bit by the red heads thrusts. Steady rhythm to Eijirous movements.
“Fuck, I’m gonna cum soon baby, want me to paint your chest?” Katsuki coos, running a thumb over your lips.
“Y-yes, please, paint me Kat,” you whine, stuttering between moans as your lids squeeze shut. Eijirou is still fucking you so deeply. Katsuki hooks his thumb into your mouth, gripping your bottom jaw, prying it open with a growl. You dig your nails into his thighs again as he roughly slides his cock back into your mouth, slipping into your throat.
It burns, an uncomfortable tickling sensation as you get the urge to cough. Forcing your throat to relax enough that he can thrust all the way in and out, to the root. You’re able to focus on the cock in your mouth a little bit more as Eijirou slows his movements for the time being. Presumably wanting to watch Katsuki cum.
Katsukis palm is slick with sweat, when he rests it on your belly, next to the other heroes hand. You free a hand from his thigh, smoothing it up over his hip and lower belly. His breath hitches when your nails dig into his slick skin, muscles flinching away from your touch. The threat of his orgasm is coiling tightly in his groin. His heart is in his throat as he reaches the peak right before he climaxes.
Katsuki makes a strangled noise, hearing going fuzzy, as he thrusts into your throat once more before pulling out completely, bracing his weight to lean further on the bed. Taking the hand from your belly, he strokes his cock quickly groaning lowly as he cums, painting your tits and a little bit of your belly with his warm, sticky release.
“Shit,” Eijirou laughs incredulously, movements having stopped completely at the sight in front of him. “That was fucking hot Kat,” Eijirou beams, running a finger over the release on your belly, then quite seductively, sucking it off his finger. Katsuki laughs, breathlessly, dick throbbing at the sight before he leans back standing on both feet again.
He’s trying to catch his breath, chest heaving. Your hands fall away from the blonde, letting them dangle as you try to remember how to breathe. Eijirou, reluctantly, pulls out with a hiss, slick cock bobbing. A whine pulls from your throat. The other two snicker.
“Are you alright pretty thing?” Katsuki asks, voice scratchy. You nod, as Eijirou grips your ankles, yanking you up the bed, so your head no longer dangles off.
“I’m definitely good, although can we switch around now? The baby is suffocating me,” you joke, laughing a little. Eijirou pats your thighs encouragingly.
“Of course my little love bug!” He says, brightly. “You want Kat to hold you baby?” He coos, gripping both your hands and pulling you up to sit.
“Please,” you giggle, angling your head to watch the blonde crawl up on the bed near the headboard. He pauses near Eijirou, to kiss him swiftly, making the red head giggle. He turns then, setting a couple pillows up so he can rest his back on them.
“Yeah yeah, c’mon needy thing,” he teases, smirking as he bends his knees and lets his heels dig into the mattress. Eijirou flicks his knee in retaliation and helps you get to your knees, holding your hands until you can shuffle around and sit on your ass in between the blondes legs.
Only having to lean back a little bit, your heated flesh comes into contact with his chest. His skin is too hot, making you immediately sweat a little. You look down at your chest, noticing you’re still covered in the blondes release, but they for damn sure won’t wipe it off until you’re done. Truthfully, you find it kind of hot, but you’re eager to keep going.
“Eijirou, c’mon, wanna cum please,” you beg. Voice so sweet and needy when it reaches the red heads ears. You let your thighs fall open for him, reaching out for Eijirou. He grins, sharp teeth fully on display.
“Course baby girl,” he purrs, inching forward on his knees till he’s right there, hard cock brushing over your swollen clit. You whine, feeling the blonde snake an arm around your middle. His fingers spread out on your belly, the other gripping your tit, pinching your nipple. Katsuki bites a kiss into your neck, laving over it with his tongue. You tilt your head to give him more access, bracing your hands on the blondes thighs.
You moan softly, Eijirou placing a hand on the underside of both your knees, pushing until your feet are off the mattress. Not too high, belly stopping you from being folded further. He raises up to his knees, angling his hips until the head of his cock catches on your slick pussy. So stretched out he can slide all the way in with no resistance.
“Eijirou,” you gasp, mouth falling open as he splits you completely. Your nails dig into Katsukis legs, pussy clenching involuntarily and the red head whimpers, feeling his cock throb in response. Eijirou’s suffocating in your silky pussy, eyebrows pinching together in concentration so he doesn’t cum too fast.
“C’mon red,” Katsuki purrs from your shoulder, chin digging into the muscle there. Ever the snake in the garden. “You’re big and strong right? Make that pussy cum,” he teases, voice low, curling down into you and Eijirou. Twisting your guts with arousal.
“Fucking hell Kat,” Eijirou pants, moving his hips in a testing pull backwards, before smoothly pushing in, until the dark hair at the base of his cock brushes your clit. You feel like he’s in your throat, telling the red head just that. “Ah, I’ll - fuck, make your pussy feel real good sweet girl,” Eijirou promises, starting slow at first.
Katsuki stares at the scene below, biting his tongue roughly, as he’s assaulted by the sight of the thick cock that disappears into your pussy over and over. He’s getting half hard again just watching. The blonde squeezes your tit, fingers biting in to the squishy flesh. You cry out, gripping Eijirous shoulders as he picks up the pace. His eyes are glazed over, eyelids hooded as he fucks you.
Your teeth clench, eyes rolling back as he hits the spongy spot inside you. Pussy clenching, toes curling as your head thumps back onto Katsukis shoulder. Something snaps inside Eijirou after that, because his deep stroke is fucking nasty from then on out. Hips curling upwards as he fucks into you, slamming your sweet spot repeatedly. You howl out his name as he moves relentlessly, dull nails scratching at his skin.
“E-Eijirou, oh my god!” You almost scream, feeling Katsukis hand rub up and down your belly soothingly. The blonde brushes his soft lips over your neck, releasing your tit and trailing his hand up to grip your jaw. His fingers dig into the muscles, yanking and forcing the angle of your head down, so you have to watch as Eijirou pummels your pussy.
“That’s it, watch Eijirou baby girl, doing so good, taking him like a goddamn champ,” the blonde growls. “Looks like Eijirous gonna fuck another baby into you, isn’t that right red?” He mocks, winking at his husband. The filthy mouth Katsuki has never ceases to push the two of you closer to the edge.
Eijirou whimpers out a mhmm, watching himself fuck you, cock so slick. The lips of your pussy stretching on his cock with each thrust backwards. His palms are slippery under your knees, sweat gathering in the hollow of his of neck, chest glistening. The wet sounds of skin meeting skin is unbearably lewd in the otherwise silent room.
“I - oh fuck, I’m gonna cum,” you choke out, sounding and feeling surprised at how fast you’re about to climax. The warmth is winding up so tightly behind your belly button, pussy fluttering and feeling amazing. The angle making you feel like you might squirt. Katsukis half hard cock jerks against your back when he hears what you said, gripping your jaw tighter.
“Fuck yeah, cum for him sweetheart, he feels unbelievable huh?” Katsuki murmurs in your ear, voice smooth as silk. You nod the best you can, Katsuki letting go of your jaw so you can look into Eijirous eyes.
“Give it to me baby, please,” Eijirou begs, mouth falling open as your pussy flutters around him again. He leans in closer to you, the two of you breathing the same air. You nod quickly, lips brushing his, toes curling as the coil tightens to the point of snapping.
Water balloon of pleasure popping, gushing waves of warmth throughout your limbs. Your body tenses, mouth open in a silent o shape as you cum, hard. Eijirou licks into your mouth once, behind your teeth before he can stop himself. Katsuki has stayed silent for the majority of this, breath hot against your ear as he’s bewitched by all that’s happening in front of him.
Hot shivers vibrate down your spine as Eijirou fucks you through it, choking on his own tongue as you clench him tightly. Pussy acting as a vice. A few more thrusts of that filthy deep stroke, one of Katsukis hands comes down to thumb at your clit roughly, forcing you to squirt all over Eijirous belly. It runs down your thighs, pooling on the sheets. You feel dizzy with pleasure and you wail, pussy trying to push the thick cock out of you.
“Oh shit, just like that sweet girl, squirt f’me baby, ah f-fuck I’m gonna c-cum,” Eijirou whines, through gritted teeth, dropping one of your legs to rest his hand over Katsukis on your belly. Both holding you almost protectively as you breathe heavily, trying to get some reprieve from your high. Katsuki takes his hand from your pussy, placing both hands back on the baby bump.
“Fucking- cum Eijirou, such a good boy, fuck her full with another baby sweetheart,” he says, voice edging on a growl. Eijirou pushes his cock all the way to the root inside you, sobbing through his teeth as his balls tighten. The sensation of his climax washes over him as his dick pulses, cumming hard. Stuffing your tight pussy with ribbons of warm, sticky cum. You kiss the red head, swallowing his moans as his orgasm fades.
Breaking apart, you whine, holding onto his forearms as he lets your other leg go. Eijirou places his other hand on your belly. All three of you take a moment, catching your breath, letting your souls return to your bodies. Your limbs are warm and gooey, feeling content. Eijirou sets his forehead against yours, pressing your lips together once again. You hum softly, lips sticking when he pulls back. He swiftly kisses the blonde as well before leaning back, pulling out slowly.
“My god, that was really fucking good,” you say, cheeks burning as you unstick your back from Katsuki, leaning forward a little.
“You felt so amazing pretty girl,” Eijirou coos, grabbing a discarded shirt to help clean you off. Which he does, wiping the slightly tacky release off your chest and belly. He sweetly cleans his release which was starting to leak from your pussy.
“It was a goddamn great fucking show is what it was,” Katsuki boasts, slipping out from behind you, sitting next to you. Eijirou agrees and you laugh, reclining into where the blonde was sitting, pillows giving your aching back some relief.
You all are feeling the sweet afterglow of sex, atmosphere warm and cozy. You hadn’t felt any movement during sex, but now you place a hand to your belly, feeling your daughter kicking you, moving around. Your stomach growls and you curse yourself for being hungry again already.
“Kat,” you mumble, looking over at him. He hums in response. “I’m hungry again,” you say, giving him puppy dog eyes. Eijirous laughs brightly as the blonde gives you an incredulous look.
“I guess we did just burn a shit ton of calories,” he snickers, rolling his eyes playfully. “Alright, get dressed you insatiable thing. Let’s find something to eat,” he teases, patting your thigh and getting up to get dressed.
“I mean now that you mention it, I’m hungry too,” Eijirous says, agreeing with you. Katsuki sputters.
“Fucking of course you are! You’re a mountain for a man!” he says harshly, jerkily tugging on his sweat shorts, tossing you a clean shirt and some shorts.
“How else would I be a top ten hero, if not for all your amazing food Kit Kat,” he coos, winking at the blonde. Katsukis cheeks turn pink and he stomps out of the room. You giggle, watching Eijirou pull on his own mid thigh length, red shorts. He runs his hands through his hair, pushing it out of face. You greatly appreciate the fact that they both remained bare chested.
“He’s gonna blow something up if you keep teasing him,” you say, smiling as you take the hand offered to you by the red head. Climbing off the bed, pulling your own clothes on.
“It’s just too much fun. Besides you’re just as bad,” he replies, framing your face with his hands and squishing your cheeks. You giggle, holding his wrists as he leans down to kiss you dramatically. You return the gesture, love blooming brightly in your chest. Smirking as he lets your face go, you lace your fingers with his.
“Guilty as charged,” you muse, letting the red head tug you out of the room. Katsuki, despite his dramatic actions, does end up making you all a snack. You all sit in the living room, enjoying the food and watching a movie. The boys taking turns whispering sweet words to you and your baby.
The three of you enjoy the rest of the night, relaxing together until it gets late. You can’t wait to see how the boys react when your daughter is born. You know, without a doubt, they’ll be amazing fathers. Then in a couple years, you’ll let Eijirou get you pregnant. You laugh to yourself, because you know, with certainty, your back definitely is gonna hurt with his giant ass baby.
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paradiseprincesss · 1 month
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Absolutely ANYTHING with psychiatrist reader x patient jon crane! We don’t have enough of these 😭 and I loveee your fics so far!
Just a suggestion, maybe him meeting reader who has suppressed feelings for him in order to not cross any professional boundaries, at her place after breaking out of Arkham. Could be angsty with some intense lovemaking afterwards (once again, it’s totally up to you what you want to write. This was just an idea I had. No smut is fine too)
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experience - jonathan crane x psychiatrist!reader
hello my love - this is such a good idea! i tried to write it the way you explained it so i hope this lives up to all ur expectations haha <3 and thank you for the kind words! i had so much fun writing this!
summary: falling in love with your patient was not something you ever thought you'd experience - but what if he's fallen for you too?
word count: 3.8k
warnings: smut 18+ mdni!!, mentions of suicide, swearing, p in v, masturbation, slight choking, kind of size kink lowkeyyy, just sex lol
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working at arkham asylum was...interesting to say the least. you were in the last year of your psychiatry residency, and after this you'd be a full, licensed, practicing doctor specializing in psychiatry. it was exciting for sure, but dealing with your patients at arkham was no easy feat.
you'd seen it all - criminals, drug addicts, the insane; all of it. every single day there was something, wether that was an patient or inmate causing a riot or someone having a mental breakdown and hanging themselves in their cell - there was always something happening.
however, there was one patient; inmate - that stood out the most to you; jonathan crane.
he'd been your patient for the last eight months as none of your colleagues wanted to take him on because of who he was - but you loved a challenge. you wanted to prove yourself to your higher-ups, you wanted to show the preceptor in charge your residency program to see what you were capable of.
so, you offered to take him off everyone else's hands - and well, you'd come to partially regret that decision. however, your higher-ups and preceptor were impressed by your skills. he wasn't easy to deal with, that's for sure. he was the scarecrow after all - and don't forget, he was a psychiatrist himself.
though, you had a hold on him the same way he had a hold on you - but you didn't tell him that. jonathan made it clear from the start that he found you attractive, even behind bars and wrapped up in a straightjacket he would find ways to flirt with you, talk to you, or get your attention.
today, you had a scheduled session with jonathan to see if any progress was being made regarding his medication (which you knew he never took), and his behaviour.
your black pumps clicked against the wooden floor, and you closed the door quietly behind you, taking a seat in your office chair. you pulled up his file quickly on your laptop, and he sat a few feet away from you on the plush couch in your office. straightjacket and all.
"good morning, jonathan." you say, finally looking up from your laptop and locking eyes with him - god, his eyes were so pretty.
he never addressed you as "doctor" with your last name following, but instead, he insisted on calling you by your first name, or some pet name he felt like using that day.
you didn't mind actually, he was one of your more...tame and easy patients that you had, if not the easiest to deal with.
"you look beautiful as always." he said, and you smile at him sweetly. "thank you, jonathan."
today, you wore a black, mid-length pencil skirt and white blouse, with your hair down in your favourite style, some black pumps - and you finished it off with your doctors coat, of course.
skimming over his file, you type a few quick notes into your laptop - freshly done nails clicking over the keys in the otherwise silent office. after that, you got up and went over to him, helping him out of the straightjacket as he sat there in his white arkham inmate jumpsuit.
at first, you didn't let him have this privilege, but as he proved himself to be non-temperamental over time, it started off with the loosening of the straightjacket just a little...then taking it off fully but making sure he wore handcuffs. slowly, under your careful watch, you allowed him the freedom of zero restraints in your office once he proved he wasn't a threat or a danger towards you.
"let's get you out of this." you say softly, and he stays quiet for a moment, just stretching once the restraint was fully off of him. you had a different method of approaching him than the other doctors who worked (and gave up) with him.
you noticed that in a calmer, less hectic environment he responded better. so instead of having check-ups in his cell or in an interrogation room like you did with all your other patients, you let him chill in your office - restraint free.
you returned to your chair, and started to type away as you asked him the usual questions.
"how are you feeling today?"
"fine, i missed seeing your face though. seeing you three times a week isn't enough for me anymore." he says to you, making you stop typing and look up at him.
"please elaborate for me, jonathan." you say clinically, trying to ignore the way your heart started to race when he said that.
"you know what i mean. you're the only thing keeping me sane in here." he says to you with a pleading tone, making you sigh as you continue to write down your clinical notes onto the laptop.
"but you're making progress, jonathan. you seem to be doing better, there's no need for me to be seeing you more frequently." you answer curtly, but pause for a moment for letting the next few words slip out in a hushed tone, "...unless you feel like you need a few extra therapy sessions on a weekly basis."
he smirks, looking you up and down - clearly checking you out with no shame. "that's exactly what i need. i'm going crazy without you. i'd be so good to you if you were mine..." he throws in that last part quickly, but you catch it.
you clear your throat and try not to pay any mind to it, as to appear professional - but he's slowly breaking your walls down. he already has. you couldn't even lie to yourself - you were attracted to your patient. fuck, maybe you were even in love with him - how could you not be?
the fluffy brown hair, slightly tousled and messy, those beautiful, blue eyes that reminded you of sapphires, those plump, pink lips that-
no, stop it, you told yourself, focus on your job.
"ah, um- have you been taking your medications?" you ask softly, giving him a small smile to which he returns. "...yeah." he says hesitantly, and you know he's lying - you find the little cup the nurses gave him full of the pills he's supposed to be taking every time you check up on how he's feeling in his cell.
but you turn a blind eye - you may have been giving him special treatment because you were attracted to him, but you tried to tell yourself it was fine, that it wasn't like you were breaking any professional boundaries because technically, you didn't act on his advances - yet.
"good, just wanted to make sure." you speak in a hushed tone again, typing up all information in his file.
"you're a really good doctor." he says, breaking the momentary silence between the two of you, "you work hard, i can tell."
"thanks, jonathan." you say, trying your hardest to sound detached as you keep your eyes on the laptop in front of you, continuing to type away but he speaks again.
"you're welcome. you're so pretty." he sighs, "is it wrong for me to be having these thoughts about-? never mind, actually."
now it was your turn to sigh, looking up at him with a raised brow. you knew what he was doing, he was literally trying to play mind games with you. he was on purposely trying to get you to pry so he could flirt with you more - but that was your job...right? to pry?
"what thoughts?" you ask, biting your lip. "i have to ask cause...it's my job to know what's going on up here." you gesture to your own temple. he knew that this was indeed your job - to know what was going through his mind.
buuuuut you were definitely curious. the way he would talk to you gave you butterflies. the way he would act out and act violently to everyone except you gave you butterflies - even though it shouldn't have.
"i just can't get you out of my mind, pretty girl. you do things to me. 'm thinking about you when i'm all alone in my cell, how your body would feel. how it feels to kiss you, hold you. what it's like to love you." he breaths out, and you look at him incredulously, feeling your cheeks heat up at his admission.
"well," you stay, breathing slightly staggered now, "you must have an active imagination, then." you couldn't look him in the eye after that. you were trying so hard to suppress your feelings for him that were ever growing.
although one part of you knew it was wrong on both ends, wrong of you to let him effect you this way (and letting it happen), and wrong of him to be talking to you like this - you couldn't stop yourself. however, a part of you wondered if this was really how he felt - or if it was just some ploy to get out of arkham. perhaps he thought if he could get into your head, you would either help him escape or sign his release papers.
you always tried to force yourself to believe that to prevent your fantasies from growing any further - but it drove you wild.
"i know you feel the same way," his voice cut through the silence, snapping you out of your thoughts again, "i have a doctorate in psychiatry - don't forget i can also see right through you and your thoughts too."
"i-i can assure you that this is strictly professional - you and i. i mean, even if it were true, that it was mutual, it wouldn't work. you're my patient in an asylum for the criminally insane and i'm your doctor because you are criminally insane." you say, looking at him with a stoic expression, though both you and him knew of the feelings that were lurking underneath your "professional" facade. "plus, saying this won't help you get out of here any quicker. i'm not stupid."
you entirely regretted those words as soon as they left your mouth, and he shot you a look of surprise.
suddenly, he got up off the couch and made his way over to your desk - your heart now palpitating in ways you didn't even realize was physically possible.
he placed his hands on the desk, looming over you - but not in a psychotic way - or threatening, even. he just looked at you up and down, with a small smirk.
"why can't you just give in? i'm not going to tell anyone. it's not like i can, anyway." he said jokingly, but went back to being serious quickly. "please."
the way he said "please" made your breath hitch, and you look up at him with poorly concealed desire. "w-we can't, okay? we just...can't."
"but i have feelings for you - and i know you do too." he insists, and you get up out of your chair, walking over to him, having to look up at him due to your height difference.
"how i feel isn't important," you state, trying so hard not to break your facade. "if you really cared about me, you would stop doing this to me. stop making my job harder than it has to be, please jonathan. it's- it's just not fair. telling me this won't make me sign those papers-"
"fuck the papers, i don't need anything as long as i have you. you're-" he exasperates, but pauses before continuing, "you're all i have in here, you're the only one who's treated me like a person, like a real person with valid emotions. you know who i am and you don't have any fear - you aren't scared of me. you see me for...me."
silence.
after he confessed that to you, it was silent. he stood there, looking at you through his wire-frame glasses that he always wore, and you stood there in shock. at that moment, you didn't know what to say - what to do.
"i'm not feeling well," you suddenly say, "i-i'm going to take the rest of the day off. i'm going to call a nurse to escort you back to your cell." you say quickly, trying to keep your composure.
you weren't very good at that when he was around, but he didn't say anything. he let you process your emotions in your own way - of course he would. but he was plotting.
you paged a nurse to escort him back to his cell early, and you didn't dare look at him when they took him out of your office - too embarrassed and such to do so.
that night, when you got home, you decided to take the next few days off work before returning - you were too high strung with anxiety for work right now; and the cause of that anxiety was literally at work.
you ran yourself a hot shower, dried your hair, and got ready for bed throwing on your silk nightie in your favourite colour. that night, you couldn't sleep at all - constantly tossing and turning in bed, thoughts running wild.
why did it all have to be so complicated?
you didn't understand, honestly. the one guy who actually managed to steal your heart happened to be...him.
you laid in the dark quietly, the only thing light source being the tv on the wall of your bedroom. the sound of your tv playing faintly in the silence, some random show you put on was on in the background.
"can't sleep either?" a familiar voice said softly from the doorway of your bedroom, causing you to let out a small scream from being startled - nobody expects someone to be in their house at nearly 3 am unnoticed.
"what the fuck?!" you say, reaching to turn the light on your bedside table on, and sat up in your bed - seeing the one and only jonathan crane standing in your bedroom looking a little different than before.
he had escaped, that much was clear. but instead of that stupid inmate jumpsuit, he was in his actual suit and tie attire but no scarecrow mask.
"sorry, darling." he cringed at the way he startled you. "hear me out, please. you look beautiful, by the way. you always do."
"jonathan-" you warned.
"i know." he says, walking towards you, now sitting on the edge of your bed as you watched in both fear and awe. "i can't let you go. if 'professional boundaries' are whats standing between us-"
"you broke into my house, jonathan!" you exclaim, cutting him off but he just gives you a small smile, which made your heart leap. "and i'm sorry for that," he explains, "but like i said, now there is nothing standing in between us."
you look at him, and your jaw almost drops. was he for real right now?
"i just wanted you to know that, um, i wasn't just saying those things with the hope that you'd ya know - release me from arkham." he says to you softly, and you nod. "well, you've made that pretty clear by doing...this." you tell him, a small smile playing on your lips.
god, he was crazy - but he was crazy over you, and maybe you were fucked up in your own little way because you found it endearing, the thought of it all excited you.
"you don't need to fight the feeling anymore." he informs you softly, reaching a hand out for you to take - and you do. his hands were surprisingly soft, a little calloused but soft.
"you know how i feel about you, i want to be yours - i want us." you finally tell him.
"be mine, then." he whispers, and you crawl over to him on your king sized bed. you crawl onto his lap, and you can already feel him getting harder by the minute.
"i can't sleep, dr. crane." you tease, calling him 'dr. crane,' instead of the usual 'jonathan.'
he places a trail of kisses down your neck softly, pushing your hair back to do so, and whispers softly to you. "why don't you let me take care of you for once?"
the words gave you shivers, and you felt yourself getting wetter with every word he said - hanging onto them with desperation. "please, baby." you whisper, and he pulls you into a frenzied kiss.
his lips were soft - so soft. you kiss him back and he takes his time with you, hands roaming all over your body as he explored your mouth. you moaned softly into the kiss, giving him the green light to keep going. he pulled away from the kiss hesitantly to undress you.
slowly, he pulled the skimpy little nightie you wore to bed down, past your shoulders - then all the way down. you felt the cold air of your room hit your bare chest, but that feeling was replaced with the new sensation of jonathans warm mouth taking one of your nipples in his mouth. he took the bud in his mouth, licking and sucking.
"oh, baby." you say, letting out a breathless moan at the sensation. in response, he took hold of your other breast and started to play with your nipple between his fingers.
"fuck, need you so bad." you say, profanities leaving your mouth every five seconds with the way he was touching you. "yeah? tell me how badly you need me, sweetheart." he says to you, coming back up to trail kisses along your jawline and neck.
"i need you so bad, jon. please, you're everything i want." you tell him, breathless and soaked. he snaked his hand up to your neck and gave it a light squeeze, keeping his hand there. "fucking jerked off to the thought of you every night in arkham," he says, making your cheeks heat up from the thought, "every time we had our little scheduled meetings - fuck, you looked so good. just the thought of you alone had me cumming all over my fist instantly."
"i-i touched myself to the thought of you in my bed, too." you tell him, making him smirk. "did you?" he cooed, "why don't you show me how you did it. let me see."
that had you blushing, and you swallowed. you nervously laid back, propped up on your elbows as he watched. with a little hesitance, you spread your legs - suddenly feeling very vulnerable. he watched you intently, still smirking, and ran his hand along your lower leg - slowly trailing it up to your thighs, rubbing up and down.
"don't be shy, sweetheart." he says lowly, licking his lips at the sight of your glistening cunt on full display for him. you take your hand and slowly started to rub your clit in front of him, and you can feel how wet you are.
tossing your head back slightly, and closing your eyes you let out a filthy moan, and he groans at the sight of you. you hear his belt buckle being undone, and you open your eyes to see him pulling his cock out - fat and leaking at the tip.
he positioned himself between your spread legs - your hand still rubbing your clit. he started to stroke his cock slowly, the pre cum leaking out the pink head of his cock. it was so big it looked like it could split you in two. "feel good, princess?" he asked, making you nod and moan.
"f-fuck, yeah. f-feels ah- so good, baby." you respond, and he started to rub the head of his cock through your sticky, soaking folds making you whine. "please!"
he chuckled lowly, and pushed into your soaked cunt with no warning. your hands flew to his shoulders, and his hand snaked to your clit to replace yours. "oh fuck-" you say, his cock stretching you out to the limit. you felt so full.
"jesus, sweetheart," he moans as he sunk into you, "fuck- tightest pussy i've ever had. best pussy i've ever had, actually." he decided as he started to thrust himself in and out of you.
"right there, baby ah-" you moan, looking up at him. his fat cock was stretching you so good - he was so deep. as his fingers played with your clit, you couldn't help but start screaming out his name.
"jonathan, fuuuck-!" you were a screaming, moaning mess for him - and he adored it. the sight alone almost had him cumming into your tight little cunt. as he pounded the same spot in your cunt, you felt yourself about to cum for him.
"i-i'm gonna fucking cum, please." you started to beg incoherently, and he moaned as he felt your pussy tighten up around his cock. "cum for me baby, i wanna see your pretty face when you cum." he says to you softly, voice saccharine.
as you came all over his cock, you swore you saw stars. the feeling was otherworldly when your orgasm washed over you. jonathans thrusts started to get sloppy and erratic indicating that he was about to cum, too.
"gonna fill this little pussy up, make sure everyone knows your mine, fuck-" he grunted, "you're gonna be dripping with my cum."
he fucked his cock into you a few more times before stilling with a groan, and his cock twitched inside of you; spilling all of his cum into your cunt, filling you up with everything he had.
he pulled out slowly, and used his fingers to push his cum back into your cunt as soon as it started to leak out, causing you to moan. "what a sight." he sighs out of breath, and you giggle breathlessly to that.
"can we cuddle?" you ask quietly, and he was already pulling you into his arms. "open." he says, fingers covered with both your fluids mixed together at your lips. you wrap your lips around his fingers, sucking them and swallowing the mixture with a little moan. "such a pretty, obedient girl." he coos, making you blush.
you settle into his arms, exhausted, and he holds you close as his heart beat heavily in his chest. he placed a kiss on the top of your head, and you felt your eyes grow heavy.
when you went back to work, you knew you would have to pretend that you didn't know where or how jonathan escaped arkham (to be fair - you still weren't 100% sure on how he actually escaped), but that was still a few days down the road - you were too fucked out and sleepy to think about that right now.
"go to sleep, sweetheart." he says to you softly, turning the light on your bedside table off, "i'll be here when you wake up - i'll always be here. i love you."
with a content sigh, and a sleepily mumbled little "i love you too," you fell asleep wrapped up in your no-longer-forbidden lovers embrace for the night.
together at last.
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reiderwriter · 1 month
Note
Requests for when you get to it:
Reader feeling inadequate at new job (doesn’t have to be BAU) and Spencer makes her feel better. 🥹
(Or you can ignore this request and release it back into the wind, whatever works best for you.)
A/N: Thank you for requesting! I hope you enjoy:)
Warnings: vomit/ mention of throwing up, small references to case details/death
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As your stomach emptied itself for the third time that day, you found yourself alone by a park bench, shaking and with tears blurring your vision. 
You wiped your mouth, pulling a bottle of water out of your backpack and swishing the water through your teeth, trying to rid your mouth of that dry feeling. 
Your body pushed itself through the stages of composing itself, but your mind stayed a riot. A corpse was not something humans were able to view naturally without response. Something inside would always wonder at the uncanny feel of knowing something that had once been imbued with life now was not. 
The corpse of a BAU case victim was even more harrowing. 
It had been three months since you'd begun working at Quantico, and every time you had to face death, your whole being protested. You'd cried, loudly, thrown up and passed out multiple times. You watched the medical examiners roll their eyes at you as you walked onto every crime scene, knowing you'd need a minute for air after. 
Instead of becoming more composed at crime scenes, though, it was like you were regressing. You'd gone from small squeaks of horror to tears to throwing up and passing out, as if your entire being were protesting your decision to be here in the first place. 
All you could see in your head were the lifeless bodies you'd encountered on both coasts of the country since accepting the job. Their names played in your head on repeat as you stumbled your way to a park bench and tried to steady your breathing. 
You didn't hear or see Spencer Reid so much as feel the change on the bench as he sat next to you and cradled your hand in his. 
He'd taken to sitting with you, in comfortable silence like this with you when he could be spared, being there for you if the emotions ever got too overwhelming. 
“I don't know if I can do this, Spencer,” you whispered, clutching his hand like a lifeline, a tether to the world you lived in. You let your eyes open, let the names in your head quiet bit not disappear as you looked to him for guidance. 
“Everyone here is so collected and driven. They compose themselves in the face of loss to find justice, and that's why I'm here too. To get justice for these people, but-” 
His thumb stroked the back of your hand as you fell into silence again. 
“I think,” he said slowly, taking the time to think about the words he was saying, to make his meaning clear, “that there is something truly admirable in your sympathy for each victim.” 
You were about to scoff when he scooted a bit closer, turning his head to look straight at you. 
“You weep for each victim as if they were a brother or a sister or a son or a daughter or a mother or a father. You weep as if their pain belongs to you, and your body reacts to the grief. You are human, and your reactions remind everyone in the vicinity that we are, too.” 
You sniffled and finally met his gaze. 
“How am I supposed to get through this? How am I supposed to progress if I can't handle even seeing them?” 
He pushed closer to you still, and you let your head rest against his shoulder, soaking his shirt with the tears you'd spilt again.
Companionable silence greeted you as you watched the world from that park bench. With the crime scene behind you, you could only look forward to the trees, the grass, and the sky. 
“Did I ever tell you that Gideon used to collect pictures of all the people he saved? He had their names, what they were doing when he last heard from them, all kinds of stuff. He decorated his office with those pictures. Those happy endings.” 
The wind blew as you listened to his words and the rise and fall of your chest, breaths syncing as you sat entwined. 
“I think everyone finds their way through. You can't force the grief out of your head, or your body will suffer, but you can use it to help you find your place.” 
The words weren't exactly absolution to your problem. People usually went to Spencer Reid for solutions, for answers, for facts, and for a clear cut yes or no. Spencer Reid had come to you with something else. Comfort, sympathy, and understanding. 
You lifted your head to the sun and let go of his hand, standing from the bench and straightening your clothes. 
“Okay, Doctor Reid,” you said, extending your hand for him to grab. “We have an unsub to catch.” 
He took your hand, and with your comfort and your grief, you walked back to the body. 
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