I think there's a genuine conversation to be had about how aro spaces have begun pushing QPRs in a similar way that amatonormativity pushes romantic relationships onto people but a majority of aros just refuse to engage in the discussion because they see it as an attack on QPRs or people saying QPRs are romantic relationships lite instead of actually looking at the fact it's critiquing how some Aros have begun pushing it almost like an alternative to romance and something all Aro's want.

No one is saying QPRs are bad but rather that there is too much push that the idea of a QPR will fix people's problems. "oh you're lonely? just find a QPR!" "You dont have to be in a romantic relationship you can be in a QPR!" "QPR is MORE than friendship" etc etc.

There's a genuine critique here of QPRs being used to continue to push amatonormativity by again assuming that every aro wants a partner - even if not romantic - and I think we can have a genuine conversation about this rather than going at each other throats over a fake argument of "QPRs bad"

I’ve recently accepted myself as partnering aro. I’ve got myself a girlfriend whom I love very deeply. I thought I was straight up aromantic, but now I see I’m demi/grey romantic and I feel levels of romantic attraction to certain people and I crave relationships with them. My girlfriend herself is also aro. And yes, we are romantically invested yet there are some romantic cliches and other romantic things that we do not participate in. And it is a perfect relationship with someone I care deeply for.

So what I want to say is that partnering aros are completely valid and are no less valid than any other type of aro.

Shoutout to aros that don't know if or how they feel romantic attraction. Shoutout to aros that definitely feel romantic attraction at some point in some way. Shoutout to romo aros and shoutout to aros who see having a partner of some kind as important to their life goals. Shoutout to aros that aren't ace. Shoutout to aros that enjoy romance and nevertheless experience romantic attraction differently than alloros do.

Just a big ol' shoutout to aro ppl that don't relate to the restrictions that uneducated and alloro ppl may project onto the aromantic label, because they don't understand that aromantic is a spectrum. You are aro enough, and your experiences with attraction and romance are not alloro!

I am giving you big hugs if you like hugs, and a big serving of your favorite refreshing beverage if not!

Hey i want to send a big shout out to everyone who uses older aspec terminology. shoutout to people who use zed instead of allo, who still primarily describe themselves as partnering or non partnering or favorable. shoutout to using nonsam and not making the jump to the newer similar terms. shout out to people who dont keep up with all the latest identities and labels. shoutout to they people who are still using greyspec and who are helping keep where we came from alive. its super cool that you keep doing that and i cant wait for younger people to find out about their options because those terms and phrases are still being used.

as someone who was partnering for most of my life until recently it really sucks that there’s no representation for partnering aros , and i think a major part of that is because alloros push so heavily “it doesn’t have to be romantic love” and “aros can date too/we can ship aros too” as a way to try and make us seem more human to them that we as a community have pushed partnering aromantic experiences away as an attempt to combat those statements

from the time i was little i wanted deeply to get married/have a life long partner i spent most of my adolescent and teenage years desperately searching for someone to like and be with, my last relationship was only 2 years ago (i’m 24)

and honestly one of the main reasons i’m nonpartnering rn is because i’ve been doing some serious healing and growth that i don’t think i can do in a partnership, i think could see myself one day being interested in partnership again

i still think of what theme my wedding would be often even when i’m not trying

we cant let the fear of alloros dehumanizing us keep us from acknowledging partnering aros

at the end of the day the baseline definition of aromantic is experiencing little to no romantic attraction not whether or not you want to date

I find myself in a weird position on romance.

Yes, let’s walk together along a forgotten pier to look at the barge that is held together by a small tugboat.

Let’s walk down to Main Street and look at all the shop windows to the pointless trinkets we can’t afford,

But don’t come too close. I don’t want to see your reflection in the window with an arm around me, I don’t want anything more.

Your more than a friend, but not what you would be to someone who isn’t me, who isn’t us.

I want to take your car out to the farmland far away from my home, I want to take you to another place that only I know,

But don’t tell me you love me. Don’t say it like someone on tv would, or how a book does.

I want to be loved, but not by someone who’s in love with love.

I want to be with you, in the same space. Talking and thinking, saying we are beautiful and we are not like this because we are broken. No matter how the past shapes us to think or love. We are different and we are beautiful.

Shoutout to aros in plural systems who have in sys partners!!

[endogenic - safe post. sysmeds DNI]

yes I am aromantic and yes I have a current partner. shoutout to aros or arospecs in relationships (romantic, sexual, queerplatonic, or any other label!) as well! 💕

If anyone is a partnering aro, can you tell me what it is like, I'm curious.

Also, what do you think of people shipping Aro characters and using partnering Aros to justify their ship?

I love the term “partnering aro”. romance???? I don’t know wtf that is and I don’t plan to. Partners, however, could mean anything we want it to mean. No expectations, no set rules, just the implication that our relationship is significant. 

Normalize wanting committed, non-romantic relationships that aren't QPR's or PLP's

shoutout to aros who don't experience any romantic attraction but are still in romantic relationships

Gets married under the aro flag, gets railed under the ace flag

Me: I'm non partnering. Agamous. Single pringle life for good. Nope, no partnerships here. It's just me, myself, and I, baby!

Queerplatonic Relationship: *exists*

Me: Oh. Uh..

Wavership: *exists*

Me: Ngnnggh..!

Appromour: *exists*

Me: HGGHGH.

Delamour: *exists*

Me: HRGHHHRHG.

Soft Romo: *exists*

Me: SHIT. I GUESS IT SOUNDS NICE.

I don't date, I pair bond.

Me 3 years ago, predicting the future:

I think that I can still be in a romantic relationship bc the intimacy and closeness would be nice. Spending time alone together. Making time to hang out. Cuddling. Stuff like that. I think that I can still gain the benefits from a romantic relationship and give to another. Like a closer friendship. Maybe it would be like a qqp from my side (queerplatonic partnership). Idk.