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amarrymeinbostonwriter · 1 year

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Okay BUT that ancient idea that all 'good' women don't have any sexual desires at all, only men do is highly destructive and still influencing society today...

For a very long time, I was so uncomfortable with the idea of having a sexuality at all because I internalized that shit. YES, REALLY!

For many years, I fought for the rights of my gay friends fiercely (all the while not connecting the dots of why it mattered to me on a more personal level).

I was loudly vocal about LGBT activism at my college, all while living like a nun and avoiding ever having to deal with any of my personal feelings.

Suppressing yourself like I did is NOT healthy. I wouldn't suggest it at all.

#I tell you I was probably the least self aware person you have ever met #granted I am sort of glad it turned out this way because I didn't know I was bipolar until I was 22 #So somehow younger me was just put all her manic energy into really loving the gays...hmm wonder why #I would not want to be a scary unmedicated girlfriend nooooooo because trust me it would have been UGLY #and somehow I thought I was asexual...I was just very good at supressing things which I can't any more because of the bipolar #and because I wanted to be the perfect daughter I tried to be straight and failed horribly at it...comp het is horrible it really is #don't waste your entire 20s trying to be someone you aren't #look you can be ace and be a woman that's not my point #hypersexuality which is a symptom of bipolar disorder pretty much rules out being asexual- sorry but I realized it #I wasn't asexual because I wasn't interested in men I was gay because I had been interested in women the whole time #I just aggressively ignored it for the most part since I had some fucked up ideas about myself and cared too much what people would think #one of my best friends is a lesbian irl and many many of my friends in school were LGBT of some kind #I purposely sought out other LGBT people to hang out with- because on a level I knew I belonged with them #I definitely miss the communities at school and I could just be around other gay people and just chill there #I'm lucky in that way I think and I hope all LGBT people experience that sense of belonging in their lives #Idk but I was thinking about the damaging confinement of assumed asexuality for women when uhhh that's not accurate WOMEN CAN HAVE DESIRES #mychatter

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punkeropercyjackson · 2 months

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Related to my prev post:

I don't give two shits if Bruce is written like a bad dad if it means we get good writing for everybody else since i think minorities are more important than a white cishet male nepotism baby unlike his butch lesbian counterpart who's judaism is an actual fundamental part of her character and since he's been written as abusive so consistently over the years it's in-character anyway

Dick can be both bi/pan and demisexual and there's more evidence for the latter than the former so making him be sexually loose is aspec erasure and mspec stereotyping and he dosen't have a thing for redheads,he has a thing for black women and to me the only guy he seems to like romantically is Roy and that adds on to his demisexuality since they're childhood best friends

'Catholic guilt Jason' is a shit headcanon that misses the major and critical part of him being Red Hood that he didn't feel the slightest bit bad about killing people and the point of his redemption was learning remorse,afrolatino Jason isn't based on stereotyping but him filling out so many black and latino cultural aspects and if any hcs for him are stereotyping it's the one that he's a slut because he's a very handsome and hot and cute goth punk man

Tim is perfect the way he is and dosen't need power ups or to get 'punished' for the oh so horrible crime of being a realistic teenage boy,he's not JUST huge a loser or a super cool dude but both at once and it's bad writing and fetishistic to ignore his wide range of relathionships that consists of mostly of women to make him a 'guys guy'

Stephanie is heavily autistic and bpd-coded so she's far from a 'normie',much less an 'it girl' but people see blonde hair and blue eyes and throw away everything else about her because that's all she's worth to them or call her an abuser and a pick me just like they do irl bpdtistic women and she's also canonically pastel/indie punk and a Team Mom but gets her presentation switched to basic and made out to be a womanchild instead

Cass had a million times more moral conflict than Jason ever did,would never in her LIFE wanna be feminine even in the chinese way and would be butch in it instead,turning her scattered speech into sign language is ableist not unlike(but not on the same level as)changing Babs' type of wheelchair disability and she'd be a better Batman than any male character in existense

Duke is only a golden child in the sense he has a yellow motif and is as disruptive and authentically quirky as his siblings,We Are Robin is a better team than the canon Outlaws,his powers are cooler than any Al-Ghul ones you could come up with,he has more femme energy than Tim does and Carrie Kelley ain't shit and only gets brought back to replace him because DC is antiblack

Damian's introduction mentality was a result of not only child abuse but also psychological grooming to get him to dehumanize himself and all his bigoted comments are explained either by him being like 12 or his writers trying to demonize brown people and anybody who thinks he's a bad person is a super-sized pissbaby with no sympathy for kids of color,shipping him with Jon is making a bisexual man into a ped0phile and Jay is good even if aging Jon up wasn't and he should be friends with Maya,Suren,Nell,Colin,Kathy,Maps,Tai and Miles,Gwen,Peni,Pavitr,Hobie and Margo from Atsv and Nico and Hazel from Pjo instead of Billy Batson or Danny Fenton or ANY Mcu characters

Talia is super hot but should be drawn in accurate arab clothes instead 'sexy assasian gear'(not that these two can't co-exist but you get what i mean),her personality is extremely rich and her stories are mega interesting,she's a good mom to Damian and literally never 'took advantage of Jason' seeing as That Scene In Lost Days was decanonized by it's writer who said it was ooc for her on his part,she should've been a mom figure to Stephanie in her Robin Days too since they would get along and she deserved her own run where she takes over Lexcorp to transform it into a force for good and become Superfam-adjacent to free herself from having only male connections

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 2 months

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wibta for telling a friend some things another friend of his said to me

🧠🐀 so i can find this later

i (17m) don’t have many irl friends (mainly bc. autism.) but there is one person, ‘alex’ (15m) i currently consider my best friend irl. he has another friend, ‘jay’ (16m) who i used to consider myself friends with. important context: we’re all trans.

jay has said a few things to me that made me end the friendship with him.

first, i’m gay. a while ago (before i realized i was a guy) i used to think i was lesbian. i mentioned this in passing to him once bc i thought it was kinda funny, and he made a weird comment about how ‘some people just don’t want to be straight’ that came off like he thought i was pretending to be gay? (tbc i very much Am gay, i literally have a boyfriend)

second, mcr is my and alex’s favorite band. every time i bring them up in conversation (which i do a Lot bc. again. autism) he makes ‘jokes’ about it being stereotypical trans music and me being a stereotype

third, i dye my hair bright colors fairly often. he’s made multiple jokes about me having ‘stereotypical trans hair’ and when i had a mullet a while back (which fucked severely btw like i looked Good with a mullet) he made a couple jokes about ‘ugly trans haircuts’

fourth, he has really bad dysphoria which isn’t an issue in and of itself, but if other trans people don’t have his level of dysphoria he often dismisses like. any dysphoria they have at all. he’s also said things about me ‘not trying to pass’ in the past as like. a way to imply my dysphoria doesn’t affect me? (i do genuinely try i’m just short and really feminine looking so i can’t pass even with a binder and masc clothes and shit)

all this made me uncomfortable and i distanced myself from him, which i don’t feel guilty about. but he’s closer to alex than he is to me, and i don’t know whether i would be justified in bringing these things up to alex. i don’t want to create drama or anything yk? so wibta?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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moonandris · 3 months

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Omg, I actually did it! I finally joined a queer dating/friendship app!!! EEEEEEK!!! I'm sooooo nervous!!! I literally have almost no queer friends IRL so I don't have anyone to get excited with me!! 🥳

One of my New Year's resolutions for 2024 was to put myself out in the world more and try my best to be more social, meet new friends (as well as potentially find a partner), and explore all my passions, hobbies, and interests with like-minded people.

As a very shy bisexual woman, it's so hard to meet other queer people, especially when you live in a more conservative area. So when I joined a queer dating/friendship app I was was SO surprised to see how many other lesbian/bi women were located near me.

Also, for some reason I've always had this super toxic thought in my head that queer women wouldn't be attracted to me because of the fact that I'm S U P ER femme/girly and I think I look very 'straight' to the average person assessing me. Trust me when I say I was genuinely SHOCKED at the matches I was getting like??? Why did I think such terrible things about myself and my sexuality? I feel really silly for thinking that and I've realized that I have a lot of inner work to do regarding my sexuality and self-worth.

This is honestly such a new, exciting experience for me and was so healing for my mind and mental health to just be able to communicate and talk with other queer women. I know this isn't writing related but it's really not something I can share with other people or on my other social media (yet) so I knew I had to make this post bc I'm just SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO excited!!!

It honestly makes me wanna cry a little. It's a very emotional feeling and also feels so freeing to just BE MYSELF and not have to hide my queerness or be afraid that someone is going to find out I'm bisexual and act really awful/disgusted towards me, you know?

Regardless of whether I find a partner or make new friends and whatnot, I'm super proud of myself that I'm not denying this part of myself anymore. I'm exploring my sexuality with people who know what it's like to be queer in this crazy world we live in. It's a really awesome feeling. 💕💕💕💕

Anyways, if you've made it this far thank you so much for reading this silly lil post and wish me good luck! Happy New Year!! 🎊

#faye speaks #faye's personal posts #not writing related #bisexuality #bisexual feels #i'm very nervous but also very excited #i'm just so happy that i can FINALLY explore this side of myself in such a positive way #if you're queer i KNOW you KNOW this struggle lmao #this was/is SUCH a healing experience too #sorry for making this silly little post #but thank you for reading

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americascomic · 3 months

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Hello. I sat here for a good 30 minutes trying to think of best how to ask this question without giving the online version of an annoying exposition dump, so I hope this somewhat makes sense: I’ve found myself, increasingly, having conversations with the more tenderqueer-esque queers in my life surrounding slurs- specifically slurs like faggot and tranny. I’m a trans guy, and I was told by another trans guy of the genre of person i just mentioned that only gay men can reclaim the word faggot, and trans women can reclaim the word tranny. I thought this was a stupid and gatekeep-y idea, and told him so, but i have been genuinely wondering if this is just a manifestation of terminally online induced queer infighting or a form of ignorant transmisogyny on my part. Is tranny a slur directed at and only to be reclaimed by trans women? Or is it just another tick in the barrel of a long line of slur speciation discourse?

I think the short answer of who can say what slur is "this is terminally online bullshit"

And my second answer is "this is a conversation that mostly people under the age of 30 have, and people mostly online have." I think the age is important - it's feels like it's a developmental phase a lot of queers go through, where they negotiate their identity." So, like I'm patient (if a little irked) when I see it on my feed. Or hear some dipshit socially awkward t-femme at Bluestockings rudely chime in to a conversation I'm having with a friend.

and I sometimes put it as a hypothetical;

I'm telling you right now, as a trans woman, in my lived experience, people of your exact intersecting identities are only allowed to say the word "tranny" on a Tuesday and "faggot" on a Friday. If you forget, remember 'tranny' and 'Tuesday' starts with 'T' and 'faggot' and 'Friday' starts with 'F'

Like, that's absurd for me to ask. And so I think that kind of forces the thought that at the end of the day I'm the one asking it. There'll be no consensus on this issue.; you have to decide for yourself whatever or not to respect one point of view over the other.

We say "listen to black people" but I had this moment in my life where IRL I did a call-out of Nazis in my community and a Black friend told me that I was talking over people of color and another thanked me for speaking up in a way that they wouldn't be listened to. Who is right? Neither. Both. You have to decide for yourself and have a strong sense of race. Same with interacting with our own queer community.

Who can say what queer slur where and when is a thing that can never be litigated online. It's such an interpersonal person-to-person thing. There's no pundit square that can fit all slurs and all identities and all experiences.

in the case of the teen in the previous story who told me not to use the word "tranny," I immediately retorted that people say that word to me on the street and spit at me, which means they recognize it as a thing of power and so I will use that power. And I don't think she'd ever had copped to it, but I think changed her mind because she was saying "tranny" over the next months.

I think for some of this shit, us trans women policing who can say "tranny" is us just doing a proxy war for transmisogny. Like, we get transmisogny in our community, an AFAB person queer person of some type who could probably leverage their privilege against us says "tranny," I can see it irking some. But, have you met a trans woman? Everything irks us. We're reprehensible.

And, I think in terms of your conversation and your friend. I dunno, I think of who-gets-to-be-lesbian discourse. I see so many people online twist in the wind trying to justify to others that they're a trans masc lesbian, or a non-binary lesbian or a bisexual lesbian and I'm kinda sitting there on my ass wondering why they're trying so hard to get probably the dumbest people online to justify our identity. Like, we're hear, we're queer, get used to it. I sometimes feel of the matter that we're all a mass medium as one and just going about shit without apology as a way to force people to confront our humanity.

Iffen you want my personal feelings on the matter, you're just as impacted by the codified violence of the state that's imposed on us and so we're all faggots at the end of the day. But the t-girl sitting next to me might feel differently, and you have to negotiate with that. Sometimes times calls for moments of respect and sometimes it's a matter of saying "fuck it" and doing the thing you know how it is.

If you would like, I can draw you a card that says "Amber, a hot trans woman, says I can say 'faggot'"

Finally, I'll say I wrote a couple paragraphs for you so I'm going to force you to return the favor and just challenge you to sit on your ass and ask yourself in honest ways what the word means and what it means to you and what's beautiful and what's ugly about the word. That - an internal process - a lot more valuable thing worth to litigate then everybody in-community being cops to each other.

And then after that, I always like to challenge people to look beyond the debate. This post I made on the matter is about a dead trans teen. It's nice to debate words, but it's also nice to look out at our wonderful, annoying community, name problems we see that creates material struggle, and then imagine solutions.

#asks #slur discourse #tenderqueer #trans #queer slurs

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jasontoddssuper · 7 months

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Okay so speaking as a long time fanfic author and aspiring books author,Percy works best as a trans girl from a writing standpoint and not just because she'd be extremely good rep.Percy being a cis guy who's stereotypically masculine is forced characterization because she has no reason to want to be one-She had no positive male role models growing up.There were definitely male teachers who were mean-spirited to her as much as female ones,Poseidon abandoned her and even after they met he prioritized her or at least treated her like a father who genuinely loves his daughter out of just her being his child instead obligation a grand total of zero times,Smelly Gabe is self-explanatory and Luke abused her too right from the start by gaslighting her.All she had was Sally so it's realistic that Percy would think women are better than men and not give a shit about being manly and preferring femininity

It's semi-canon that Percy has a trauma based dislike of men if we're looking at subtext-In the og series,she speaks much more positively of the girls around than she does the boys and she actually trash talks the latter while using being hypermasculinity as an insult,such as implying Ares is ugly multiple times.And one of the three male friends she has vs being friends with almost every girl in her age range?Nico,Pjo's first canon mlm.This just absolutely screams 'baby gays spotting eachother without either knowing they're not cishet yet' and it's only added on to by how devoted they are to eachother despite the problems in their relathionship.Plus,just sayin',but the explicit reason Nico got over his crush on Percy is that she wasn't a traditional male hero like he thought she was

On similar note,Rachel is a lot like many irl lesbians and her and Percy remain besties after their break up and the first point applies to Reyna too,who liked Percy and likewise after taking away the posibility of romance to their dynamic,they remained great friends and it's a common tgirl experience to still be close to all your ex girlfriends in a platonic way post-egg cracking.Percy reminds me so much of so many of my trans woman friends in tons of ways and i've seen others say the same and back to my first point,the logical conclusion to Percy hating having to be a man who's super masculine is to make her a woman who's super feminine so she can be happy so this all comes full circle

And onto specifics for the Pjo storylines and developments,Percy gains even more depth if she's a trans woman.A self admitted former 'troubled kid' who just wants to be normal but is always getting shoved into a role she dosen't want by people who think they know better than her despite barely knowing her,Luke's fixation on targeting younger girls can be told as a feminist tale by having her the hero of the prophecy instead of him and also be the one to kill him to avenge her female friends and you cannot tell me that the idea of the protagonist of one of the best children's books series out there being a trans girl who's got bad social skills,anger issues and merciless tendencies but never gets demonized for them,is the funniest person in the whole franchise,hyperfemme too and the fucking daughter of Poseidon isn't based as all fuck

She would also help Annabeth's character development by teaching her to not be a pick me anymore and Annabeth would thank her by teaching her to be more self-confident,Nico and her would've become found siblings and Nico and eventually Hazel could've even been adopted by Sally because of it,her transfemininity would've changed the angles of her dynamics with the gods to make them make more interesting,we could dive into how Pjoverse greco-roman mythos play into transgenderism and other types of queerness,Percy's already canon present Team Mom habits and hinted love for cute and 'kiddy' things would be used to their full potential like they deserve,it opens to door to an even more interesting potential romantic dynamic with Jason and there's definitely way more

I'm not sure how to end this so i will make a /hj:Percy Jackson is a female protagonist of all time

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olderthannetfic · 4 months

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https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/738186087970881536/i-dislike-a-lot-of-transcharacter-fic-because-a

Yeah, with some of the judgy comments left on the anon about the friend who was squicked out by a trans headcanon smut fic... I get the frustration that one identity is opt-in while the other is just assumed, and maybe it was that anon's wording, but I do think for a lot of people (including, or perhaps especially, trans people), trans fic is a DNW on requests less because they NEVER like it, and more because it's the sort of thing you've talked about on here about how if there's anything you only like when it's "handled well," that a lot of fanfic writers routinely handle poorly, you should DNW it. Because you can't know if the random person you're assigned to will be good enough to "handle it well," or even know what "well" means for you. And a lot of the people who write it the worst will jump at any gap in your wording to write it, if you aren't absolutely clear.

And honestly, I really dislike reading PIV especially in slash or femslash, so even in the fandoms where I am really into trans headcanons for particular characters, I still have to DNW PIV specifically because it seems like SO many people think that's the only option with trans characters in M/M or F/F relationships! In ones where I don't have any trans headcanons, or that have a habit of trans headcanons for characters where I disagree with it, or whatever, just DNWing trans headcanons seems more convenient. (I also am a veteran of a fandom where there was obnoxious discourse suggesting that anyone who disliked PIV in slash was transphobic, or sometimes even if you were a cis gay man or lesbian and didn't like PIV in your own offline sex life. Not even about if you're interested in trans people who haven't had bottom surgery in the first place, just if you like having a *specific kind of sex* with them. It was... yeah. Yeesh. [Also surprising to me, because I've had a lot of close trans friends IRL over the years who had dysphoria around PIV and preferred other kinds of sex with their partners themselves, to see people online treating it as like the Holy Grail of gay trans sex.] So it put a further bad taste in my mouth about a trope I already disliked, which is unfortunate because people in other fandoms I've joined since aren't like that at all. But you can't help when past bad discourse ruins a thing for you personally.)

Some of the best fic I've ever read, including smut, has involved trans headcanons for canonically cis or unspecified characters. But it is definitely a thing that - probably not helped by the fact that it was promoted so hard a few years ago in certain spaces as a thing to make your fic more "progressive" - is done so poorly SO often. And you can often really tell if the particular shitty writer is trans or cis, too. Because if it's a bad writer who is trans, it will feel like a self-insert fic. If it's a bad writer who is cis, it will be inaccurate and fetishy and often unintentionally-transphobic.

But I've read incredible trans fic by both cis and trans writers, and I only knew which one they were because I knew these people personally - because when it's done well, you (usually) can't tell.

--

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ace-of-pussy · 20 days

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Hey!

I’m Boo, Ace or Monday. Just a silly little guy trying my best. About Me:

minor • asexual • lesbian • she/they • British • neurodivergent

(banners below were designed by @lgbtq-userboxes they have loads on their blog go check them out <3)

Fandoms:

Good Omens • The Sandman • Percy Jackson • BBC Ghosts • Sherlock • Jujitsu Kaisen • My Hero Academia • Bungou Stray Dogs • Sky Children of the Light • Cult of the Lamb • Legend of Zelda • Undertale • MCU

I have an side blog, @ace-of-poets

What I do there (and take prompts for):

art • creative writing • poetry • book recommendations • headcanons and lore dumps

I have many OCs that I would love to talk about if prompted, but I probably won’t make art of most of them. something something anxiety about ruining them for myself.

And I don’t draw smut but I will draw gore :)

below is the closest I can get to me irl~

⬆️~image above is from adrisona maker~⬆️

⬆️~image above is from little guy maker~⬆️

DNI:

homophobia • transphobia • xenophobia • racism • sexism • porn

⬇️~moots under the cut~⬇️

@loveisaseriousmentaldisease: my irl I love her very much

@tinksro: also my irl. Literally only reblogs and likes but I still love her

@paloma-ascends-into-hellfire: my silly Canadian bestie. Doesn’t know what a sleep schedule is. Love her

@cycloneseven: aussie. devoted. love you

@redmegarex: fucking freak (affectionate) a bit silly and the about really says it all

@allum3r: wonderful friend i met playing Sky, really nice and kind. posts incredible sky photos on her blog

@samijami: funny, probably needs a hug. love them very much :3

@distinctlyrevived: gorgeous poetry. wonderful blog.

@starry-eyed-darling: is probably gorgeous irl based off of vibes. lovely blog

@bookscorpion73: one of my oldest moots! dont interact much but they r very cool :)

@throatofdelusion12: jonathan sims. i dont know beyond that

@belabeya: me but emo. love u <3

#text post #text #intro post

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v-anrouge · 28 days

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Answer some or all, I want to know more about you 👀 that wasn’t the right emoji but oh well I’m using voice to text

Do you have freckles?

Do you drink tea or coffee? How do you take it?

What was the last song you listened to?

Do you sleep on your back, stomach or side?

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?

Do you prefer drawing or writing?

What’s your ideal number of blankets to sleep with?

What’s your favorite band/artist?

When is your birthday?

How tall are you?

What color are your eyes?

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now?

Fears?

What’s your favorite color?

What’s your favorite season?

Want any tattoos? What of?

Want any piercings? Where?

Who is the last person you texted?

Do you have a best friend? How long have you been friends?

What/who do you miss?

How was your day today?

How much sleep did you get last night?

Do you believe in aliens?

When was the last time you cried? Why?

What’s your favorite decade?

What are some seemingly childish things you like?

What’s your favorite book? Or just one you’ve read a few times?

How are you, really?

Does it take you a long time to make decisions?

What are you looking forward to in the near future?

What are you looking forward to in the distant future?

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go?

Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

What’s your favorite flower?

Do you currently have a squish?

Do you like your middle name?

Do you prefer dogs or cats?

Do you have any phobias?

Do you stay up late?

Do you like the beach? Do you prefer it sunny or cloudy?

What’s your favorite cartoon?

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs

Do you have siblings? How many?

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?

Is there anyone you would die for?

What do you need when you’re sad?

Have you memorized your phone number?

Who’s someone you can trust with your life?

What does your last text say?

Wild Card. Any question, ask away.

1- actually yeah but theyre super super super light so u can barely see them

2- coffee, i hate tea. i drink it with milk and sugar

3- more KDA

4- side, shrimping

5- yes:3 rook vil and my childhood plush

6- drawing

7- one, and it has to be thin

8- DONT DO THID TO ME I CANT DECIDE

9- june 19

10- 5'3 💀

11- very dark brown

12- all my mooties

13- abandonment, forests, insects, worm like things, heaven, dogs

14- blue and purple

15- winter 100%

16- yes! maybe of a deer, not realistic tho

17- i want all my piercings back my mom made me take them off so now im only left w my bites and the cheek ones😔

18- my mother

19- my lesbian irl :3 like two years?

20- peace

21- okay-ish

22- like 4 or 5?

23- i don't care for them

24- like 1 hour ago, obey me 💀

25- i don't think there are decades to be celebrated humans are evil in all of them

26- cute things, children movies and cartoons, they make me happy

27- i haven't read in LONG because books in brazil are way more expensive than i can afford

28- okay i think

29- yes😭

30- getting a job that i actually like

31- moving with my irl

32- to my irl's house :3

33- locked shut

34- oleanders!

35- nope

36- HATE IT

37- CATSSS

38- insects, worm like things..i think that's it?

39- yeah💀

40- no, but also yes, i dislike beaches because in there's always those fucking sand dollars , i prefer it sunny because the water is cold

41- GUMBALL!!!

42- I CANT I DON'T WANT TO MAKE ANYONE SAD FOR NOT BEING HERE

43- two older brothers

44- my irl

45- my irl...

46- distract myself and talk to people i like (usually my irl)

47- no i havent 😭

48- my irl <3

49- it's a fight between me and my mom id rather not, sorry

50- I have absolutely no idea what to ask tbh😭 uhmm i guess id like to ask why so many ppl like me

#✎ ⇣‧₊˚ 【asks #ৎ୭ ⇣‧₊˚ 【stinks #♡ᭂ ⇣‧₊˚ 【 caspian

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97ify · 1 year

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ʬʬ﹕ MEET THE DRiVER .ᐟ

BENJi or JENNA ORTEGA’s REAL GF (CANON) ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⌁ nineteen. he!xe. puerto rican. your typical mean lesbian !

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀˖ ࣪⭑

⠀ ❝ shut the actual fuck up before i raw dog your mom. ❞

personal shit ! ☆

ABOUT JJ ✦ professional milf fucker. graphic design major. aspiring sugar momma. uzui tengen’s doppelgänger (i have so many wives fr). irl ava ayala (100%). miles morales’ actual cousin (real). venom's real life best friend (aside from eddie ofc). certified makima & himeno hater. diagnosed BPD pill popper. eren's biggest bully (so real it's canon). soul’s guardian. denji’s sibling. quanxi’s fifth gf (not clickbait).

MY ACCOUNT ✦ is for hispanic/latines that never see themselves in either oc's or readers, mainly because they're always white and don't have culture. it is also for my tall girls (i'm only 5'6, but tall women are everything) who never get representation in media, aside from the tall girl movie where they weaponized her height until the last 30 mins of that god forsaken film. so if you're one of the two, or even both, then my account is definitely for you love.

my beloveds ! ☆

ANIMANGA(S) ✦ attack on titan. god of high school. jujutsu kaisen. classroom of the elite. soul eater. chainsaw man. blue lock. gangsta. tokyo revengers. haikyuu. demon slayer. death note. hunter x hunter. sailor moon. angels of death.

COMFORT LOSER(S) ✦ takemichi hanegaki. michael afton. yuji itadori. denji hayakawa. suzune horikita. mikasa ackerman. mori jin. black star. meguru bachira. nicolas brown. aran ojiro. suma uzui. misa amane. killua zoldyck. usagi tsukino. isaac foster.

vibin’ things ! ☆

PLAYLIST ✦ bts. piwon. e'last. ateez. txt. le sserafim. new jeans. twice. xdinary heroes. onlyoneof. wonho. jiae. monaleo. megan thee stallion. flo milli. glorilla. kehlani. young m.a. ski mask the slump god. d4vd. kali uchis. joji. mitski. rae sremmurd. bad bunny. daddy yankee. melanie martinez. pierce the veil. zion & lennox. hector & tito. selena. a boogie.

MI FAVORITAS ✦ women. milfs. racing (fast cars). music. drawing. coloring. writing. reading. the color pink. dogs. cats. embracing and getting educated on my culture. kpop. watching kdramas. video games. maladaptive daydreaming. anime. mangas. manhwas. horror movies. slashers. lesbians.

⠀ ✿ 。 ׄ ׅ 𝟶𝟶 ׄ 𓈒 : 𝟶𝟶 ꞌꞋ ۪ ׄ ﹏

mis escribe ! ☆

BASIC STUFF ✦ i always write tall (6'2), indigenous taíno puerto rican oc's for my stories. only time i won't is when a request specifically asks for an unlabeled reader, or a specific type of reader that doesn't correlate with my typical one.

WARNINGS Y DISCLAIMERS ✦ i am obviously lesbian (if you still couldn't tell), so a majority of my writings will be for female characters and/or non-male characters. however, whenever i DO do an x male character book or oneshot, it'll either be a request from a mutual or because it's one of my favs.

mi personalidad ! ☆

MY ATTITUDE ✦ i am very blunt and honest, when it's needed. i try my best not to be sarcastic all the time online cause i am in real life and it's caused too many altercations for my liking, especially since i don't like people. if i sense something is off, i'll tell you. if you did something wrong, i'll tell you, so i expect the same in return. but aside from that, i try my best to be as nice as possible, especially to others with similar interests.

DISORDERS ✦ i have both ADHD & BPD (recently diagnosed with BPD) and i'm still trying to adjust to it, and the medicine. furthermore, i have moments where i "split" which means i won't want to interact, talk, or even do anything. i become a state of wanting nothing to do with anyone; friends, family, no one. so when that does happen, i will put my account on lockdown and won't be active until it's over, which usually lasts a few days.

➷ TO ADD ONTO THAT . . . whenever i take my ADHD medicine, it usually makes my splitting worse due to the symptoms of the medication, and also makes my anger issues insufferable. the only reason i'm making these publicly known is because i've learned from my mistakes in the past about not alerting people of them and it causing problems in the future.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ © 97ify

#✶ .ᐟ navigation #✶ .ᐟ 97ify navi #✶ .ᐟ about me

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glitterock · 3 months

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i’ve seen some people claiming you’re a terf or at least friends(?) with a terf. is this true?

i’ve answered this before and i really don’t want to talk about it again because it’s super upsetting to me that people would even think that with 0 evidence but i’ll lay it all out one more time:

a friend of mine from irl also just so happens to have a blog. she accidentally reblogged a picture from an apparent terf on here and didn’t know. since then someone on here made a post about my friend saying that since this happened she must be a crypto terf and that since i know her, i must be a terf apologist or a terf myself. this post included absolutely no evidence that i hold terf ideals except for the fact that i simply know someone who accidentally reblogged a picture. since this person has a following and once someone in here is called a terf it sticks to them, now a large amount of people who know nothing about me and have no real facts to go off of are calling me a terf, telling my mutuals im a terf, and spreading a huge fucking nasty rumor about me.

for starters, my friend is not a terf. me and her are a part of the same irl community so i’ve seen her interact with trans people and trans women in our community as well as my friend group which consists of trans people and she’s nothing but kind. we also have had conversations about transness in the lesbian community so i know exactly what her morals and thoughts are on this particular topic and she isn’t a trans exclusionary person. she says she just doesn’t check where she reblogs things from as many of us do because we have lives and don’t have time to research every single username we reblog from. I am believing her because i know her actions in real life and my real life friendships and relationships are more important than what ppl i will never meet on the internet think of me.

i don’t want to have to prove myself because it feels fucking ridiculous and weird and performative to have to make a list of reasons why i’m not a terf but since people keep saying this about me:

i have trans femme friends, i have lived with trans femme roomates and currently live my my best friend who is a trans man, and a i have little cousin who i adore who is a trans woman. When my cousin came out i sent her a huge box full of old clothes, makeup, books about queerness and transness, buttons, accessories, etc. and my aunt called me crying saying what a huge difference it made. When i am out at queer events and see trans women who are are by themselves i always try to make a point of saying hi or complimenting their outfits so they feel a little less alone. When creating my zine, i knew that it would be imperative for me to include trans femme voices in it to create a proper narrative of the lesbian community because trans women are an important part of our community and i have nothing but respect and adoration for them. I always try and do my best to be a trans ally especially knowing the privilege i have as an afab femme in the lesbian community, and I have never once in my life held any terf ideals and never will because that is genuinely not how i am. it’s extremely extremely upsetting that people have stuck this label to me without knowing anything about me and especially without having any proof that i’ve ever said anything against trans women, trans people in general, and tbh i don’t even know anything about radical feminism.

the person who made that post also claimed i was friends with 2 people on here who are terfs, one of them being the person that said something along the lines of: “i would only fuck a femme but i could only be with butches” and it caused a huge fucking mess on here a few months ago. I need to make this extremely clear that we are no longer friends and haven’t been in over a year and have been no contact, again, for a year. i was in an absolutely terrible toxic sexual friendship with them that made me feel genuinely horrible about myself and I spent weeks in therapy trying to unpack it all, get over it, and get out of it. having this old friendship that was so awful for me being thrown in my face as if i’m still in it also is super upsetting for me.

if u want to see the post, im pretty sure the user that made it is meansweatydyke or something like that and im sure it’s still up so u can see for yourself. i want u to pay attention tho to the fact that nothing in their call out post actually pertains to my personal morals or thoughts and only is about my proximity to people who have mistreated me/ or have done things unknowingly. it’s super fucking irritating and upsetting. I am 100% on board for calling people out when their actions show that they are bad people, but i have made 0 actions that show this besides being guilty by association.

short answer: no i am not a terf, have never been a terf, and will never be a terf. it says that in my pinned post, and i always strive to uplift my trans friends and trans voices in the community with the platform i’ve made for myself online and in my zine. anyone who knows me knows i am not a terf.

id really love it if people would stop spreading this horrible fucking rumor about me and stop telling people i am a terf now with absolutely no evidence to back it up

#anon #like i don’t want to keep talking about this but i need everyone to know this #this also isn’t the first time the person who made the call out post has said stuff about me #when i made that post about how queerness is messy they made an indirect saying i was lesbophobic? literally for what #that person just doesn’t like me. and it looking for a reason to validate that.#like you can not like me that is totally fine but to make up a reason as to why you don’t like me and that reason being that imma terf #with nothing ti back it up other than i know someone or used to know someone #is actually vile and fucking bully behavior tbh #especially since i’ve never interacted w that person ever in my life like just hate me from afar like a normal person pls #in the call out they were like ‘i’ve always had a bad feeling about her but never had any evidence to back it up!’ like yeah #that’s called just not liking someone for no reason #which you can totally do!!!!! that’s fine!!!! just don’t make up a fucking reason to go along with it

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yourtoradorasextendedwarranty · 1 year

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I can't in any capacity say that I'm an ally to anyone. That's not me being an asshole. That's not me being a bigot. I'm an ally to no group. I'm a friend to people. And I care about people. Someone asked me about one of my asks where I got called a transphobe and a homophobe and it reminded me about the topic in general.

Fact is I don't care what color you are. What religion you belong to. What sexuality you are. What Identity you assume. If you are not a dick to me or to people that I care about, I won't take issue with you. What's weird though is to be called homophobic when a lot of my friends are lgbt. And this is not one of those, "Well I have a black friend" moments. I legit have friends from varying walks of life. One of my best friends from college was a gay black furry. And one of my favorite past times was picking on him in playful ways. Why? Because if was always fun to see him flustered and he actually thought it was funny. Am I gay? No. I'm comfortable in the fact I'm straight. And my friend knew that.

There are going to be a lot of things that people say that I don't agree with. Does that make me hateful? No. It just means that I have my own views on things. I however understand that if I WAS hateful towards certain groups, I'd have to be bigoted against a huge number of my friends. Like my college buddy from Sri Lanka, his friend and our roommate who's have Korean half Black. Several of my ex GF's who've been bisexual. Even friends of mine who are lesbians whom I've defended in public after they have been accused of being transphobes for, and I'm not kidding, "No being willing to suck the dicks of trans women". That's not a fucking joke. And it's sick.

I've made posts about how I'm not an extremist because I'm not. Fact is, and I mean this, I should not be considered an bigot because I don't worship a movement. No one else should either. And on my blog I will cover a lot of topics. Like:

-Groomers -Gun Laws -Radical Feminism -Black Representation in TV and Movies -Race Swapping -Capitalism -Communism -Socialism -Anarchy -State and Federal Powers -Etc.

And there will always be more. I'm not transphobic. I just want kids left alone. I'm also not homophobic, but again leave kids alone. If you are an adult you can love another consenting adult. I take ZERO issue with it. And I never will take issues with it. My only focus on any of that stuff is quite literally "Let kids be kids. Let them figure out who they are without pushing them. Don't sexualize them ever." Simple rules to live by. Anything else? I'm willing to have a discussion about. Hell I've been on record losing my shit at least in one of my reblogs borderline making promises to deal with anyone who would threaten any of my friends/family irl because they are LGBT.

What many don't understand about me is that I'm an angry ginger who is actually pretty moderate on most issues. And it's only in cases where people belong to cult like mentalities that anyone can even REMOTELY consider me hateful or radical. More so when we consider that the only people I actively hate are those that actively seek to harm others. And not just in a weird way that won't do anything. I'm talking people that WILL or would enact actual violence onto people I care about. Like the FBI. Or Antifa. Or real extremist white supremacist's. Or segregationists leftists who have called some of my non white friends "house N-". I typically don't give that word any power myself and most of my friends don't, but believe me when I tell you, I'll make you look like a punk and I won't even have to touch you.

So even the notion, that I'm X type of bigot is hilarious to me. And no amount of this, "Bow to me and my ideology or you are a bigot" will make me change who I am to my friends, my family, and the people I care about. I worship no one. And I will never bow to your cult like ideals. And maybe one day, someone like the person who sent that ask will find it justifiable to kill me. Who knows. I certainly don't. All I do know is that I'm a very caring person. And a lot of the time the stuff I mean get's lost in translation. What I say might be interpreted one way by one person and another by someone else.

That's just reality. But if you can't even come to me and ask for clarification, or you just expect me to placate someone because of the group they belong to, then you are barking up the wrong tree. You are not my friend. You are not my family. And a number of you are people that would actively endorse having me end my own life, or wishing someone would end my life for you.

Why? Because you are tyrants. You believe yourselves gods and that your "moral rights" are and should be everyone's "Moral rights". You will not rule me. You will not control me. You will not make me worship you as if you were gods. I am me, and only me. And I will live me best life not just for myself, but for the people I hold dear.

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wndaswife · 4 months

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heey, we never interacted but i really like you as person and u pass me such a comfy vibe like😭 and i really need to vent or else im going insane-

uhhhh im a little lesbian of 20y and in uni, fine. and a curiosity abt my uni: since its a private one, my department gets the same teachers since the 1st year of undergrad which is cool bc they really track our development there BUT i have this teacher (really. really beautiful btw.) who gives biology, cognition, neuropsychology and forensics psychology and she’s also a hard one…her classes are only for those who pay attention, she’s super demanding and a black cat energy (she literally gives nooooooo fucks to anyone). so OFC i had to develop a little crush on her🤠 anywayss months passed, im on my 2nd year now and she still has this HORRIBLE (but i love it) habit of looking at a person’s eyes when explaining something and she really STARES so i was always **giggles and laufs**, but this year i fell into a depressive episode so i stopped going to classes (including hers), i stopped going to her orientation classes and so one day my friend said “she’s worried abt you and she asked me to tell u that she wants an email from u to agree on a time and day to talk to her personally”. i thought i was fucked honestly, but we eventually agreed on a time at her office and turns out the convo was actually nice (i cried my eyes out while she said how worried she was abt me).

after that she was more touchy with me? like when she talked to me after class she always grabbed my arm or put her hand on my shoulder or she talked to me SUPER close AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO THINK specially bc she herself said “if u were a student who didn’t care abt my classes it’d be totally different, but you’re not. i care about you” BUT BRO??? i NEVER saw her act that way with other students, also she doesn’t ask anyone to come to her office-

(i actually thought she hated me bc a while ago she spent MONTHS ignoring my existence💀)

omg this is so funny u say this... one of my best friends always says i give comfort vibes like when im over i always make his place feel really comforting... that's so weird i wonder how it's possible i give the same vibes online.. but anyways im actually really glad that's the kind of vibe i give, cuz i also love this vibe!!! comfort and comforting things are really important to me

that's so cute... also first of all for you, that means you are such an attentive student and so hardworking for her to pay so much attention to you, so look at you you little academic star!!!!! you little academic you!!!! you little academia student you!!! so that's good for you

also that's so sweet of her... comforting older women <3 tbh the last thing i need rn is an irl older woman obsession like that shit always has me so down bad with a twinge of mommy complex LMFAO like i need that bus girl i mentioned before many eons ago (im trying again next semester cuz im a HARD WORKER)... but this aint about me... that's so good for you and that's so sweet of her <3

if you want to deepen a connection you should talk more about the subject, get her to recommend some interesting things for you to research and study and books to read, so she can start talking to you about things she likes on a personal level, and also this builds off of a good reputation you already have of being an attentive student who is interested in the class!! and ofc she sees you this way already as she has mentioned it

even if platonic (tho the gay panic is so real either way) a good connection with a professor you look up to within a topic you're interested in is a very good connection to have, you will always get something good from it

#rae responds #anon

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sopestvr · 11 months

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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀† ABOUT THE WRITER !

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♱

XANJYL⠀or⠀BTS RAPLINE’s #1 STAN (CANON)⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀✶ nineteen. he!xe. boricua. your stereotypical mean lesbian !

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⟡

⠀⠀⠀“ my name? mf there’s too many, next question. ”

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ wattpad † tiktok † instagram

♱⠀PRIVADO⠀ᵎᵎ

VENOM⠀⟡⠀benji. evren. venix. yociel. czar. certified milf pursuer. graphic designer. born n raised new yorker. aspiring sugar momma. miles morales’ cousin. hobie brown’s unprovoked sidekick. professional makima & himeno hater. irl gwenpool. venom realest best friend. ava ayala in the flesh. diagnosed bpd pill popper. keeho’s secret bsf. ricky’s boss baby. yunjin’s needy.

BLOG⠀⟡⠀is for hispanic/latines that never see themselves in either oc's or readers, mainly because they’re always white and don't have culture. it is also for my tall chica’s who never get representation in media, aside from the tall girl movie where they weaponized her height until the last 30 mins of that god forsaken film. so bienvenidos mis amores.

♱⠀MI VIDAS⠀ᵎᵎ

TWIZZY’S⠀⟡⠀hobie brown. nagi seishiro. katsuki bakugo. keiji akaashi. yuuji itadori. maki zenin. ava ayala. america chavez. aña corazón. miles morales. shoyo hinata. takemichi hanegaki. hinata tachibana. denji hayakawa. chigiri hyoma.

MIS QUERIDAS⠀⟡⠀adri. mia. mula. lin. via. aster. riah. zeph. amy. cori. zayi. lulu. anahi. bri. naomi. mars. raj. dawn. rissy. sol.

REPLAY⠀⟡⠀chief keef. yeat. kanii. lijay. koto. odetari. cade clair. ken carson. playboi carti. a boogie. d4vd. ice spice. kendrick lamar. lil uzi vert. 2pac. biggie. labrinth. joji. monaleo. flomilli. glorilla. megan thee stallion. kehlani. young ma. ski mask the slump god. kali uchis. melanie martinez. mitski. rae sremmurd. bad bunny. daddy yankee. pierce the veil. zion & lennox. hector & tito. selena. baby metal. bts. e’last. piwon. ateez. txt. le sserafim. new jeans. xdinary heroes. onlyoneof. wonho. jiae. zb1. insane clown posse.

♱⠀PREFERIDO⠀ᵎᵎ

ANIMANGAS⠀⟡⠀attack on titan. god of high school. jujutsu kaisen. classroom of the elite. soul eater. chainsaw man. blue lock. gangsta. tokyo revengers. haikyuu. demon slayer. death note. hunter x hunter. sailor moon. angels of death.

COMFORT LOSERS⠀⟡⠀venom. miles morales. takemichi hanegaki. michael afton. yuuji itadori. denji hayakawa. suzune horikita. mikasa ackerman. mori jin. black star. meguru bachira. nicolas brown. aran ojiro. suma uzui. misa amane. killua zoldyck. usagi tsukino. isaac foster. katsuki bakugo.

♱⠀ESCRIBE⠀ᵎᵎ

BASICS⠀⟡⠀i always write tall (6'2), indigenous taíno puerto rican oc's for my stories. only time i won't is when a request specifically asks for an unlabeled reader, or a specific type of reader that doesn't correlate with my typical one.

#♱⠀—⠀sopestvr #♱⠀—⠀navi #♱⠀—⠀about me

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moonlightcookie · 23 days

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a love letter to seamoon

disclaimer this will get Very long. majority will be under the cut. this will be very personal

i didn't grow up seeing lgbt media, only glimpses of gay fanart and fanfiction, created by fans. openly gay or trans characters in media didn't really exist when i was a child, and when they were, it was all homophobic and transphobic stereotypes, meant to get a laugh out of the cishet audience.

i grew up in a society where being gay (or trans), was a bad, shameful thing to be. the very first time i came out to anyone, it was my best friend in 7th grade. i texted her, crying bc i was so ashamed of myself, and afraid of her reaction. i texted her, bc i couldn't bear to say it aloud. she was the only one i had told, for years.

It's terrifying to even think of outing yourself when your peers were like hungry wolves, taking any opportunity to find anything wrong with you. i was already fat, ugly, a teacher's pet, etc. I generally kept to myself, and other kids didn't like that. especially since i was poor, and would often show up to school in old, torn clothes every day. nooo way i felt safe enough to come out to anyone else, until a few years later in high school (which was still super scary btw!!)

imagine how i felt as a teenager, seeing Steven Universe on air, especially after the Ruby + Sapphire reveal. a kid's cartoon with largely female/nonbinary characters AND canon lesbians? with onscreen lesbian kisses? on the MOUTH?? nowadays it might seem silly to praise SU for its lgbt representation, when now there's a lot more (by comparison) of openly lgbt media. but i feel like people, esp young people who grew up alongside SU and other openly lgbt media, don't realize just how revolutionary (and recent!!) SU was for its time. SU had actually been cancelled shortly after the Rupphire wedding, for obvious reason. before then, people would jump thru hoops to say that Ruby and Sapphire were sisters, or just "very good friends" . other countries would censor their relationship or not air it at all. sadly, i still see the same happen to other sapphic characters/relationships, including seamoon.

All of this is to say, i just want to let out how important Sea Fairy and Moonlight, and their relationship, are to me.

I first learned about Cookie Run 6-7 years ago when kinning CR characters was a big thing on tumblr lol. one of my mutuals would post about it, and the characters i saw looked cute, so i went to the wiki to look at some more. immediately i was drawn to Moonlight Cookie, and getting her on the official CR personality quiz didnt help either lol

then when i saw Sea Fairy's page, and her mentioning her deep love of the moon, i immediately knew she was really talking about Moonlight, and that seamoon was intended to be canon. this was all before the relationship charts, mind you. all we had were Sea Fairy's inital LINE/Kakao release event, and both Sea Fairy's and Moonlight’s loading lines to go off of

even back then, people were upset at the possibility of them being in love, headcanoning them as sisters or just "best friends", others would say Sea Fairy was talking about the literal moon, or even the moon that Moonlight rides on...

frankly, it was obvious to I and many other sapphics that seamoon was canon. the moon affecting the sea's tide IRL, Sea Fairy being the legendary released after Moonlight, with her entire story up to that point was of a sea fairy who was cursed to be frozen upon trying to reach the moon she so loved. Both their lines referencing longing + loneliness, the City of Wizards and the Tower of Frozen Waves's proximity... it all added up.

finally, on November 14th 2019, Devsisters released the "I Want You Every Day" MV. where we finally get real confirmation of Sea Fairy and Moonlight's relationship, and especially Moonlight's reciprocation of Sea Fairy's feelings, with this legendary moment:

(gifs from @/kumiihocookie) to finally have confirmation- there is no sentence in the English language that could accurately describe my feelings. Elation, jubilation, vindication, ecstatic, the list goes on. literally where else am i supposed to find a character who's just like me, including being canonically sapphic?! to have a character i see so much of myself in, be confirmed to be in love and in a relationship with another woman, one who loves her so much as to literally go to the ends of the Earth(bread) for, i cannot find the words although LDRs arent for me, they are the reality for many lesbians, including my own at one point. seeing these two women continue to love each other unconditionally despite their distance, despite the very real reasons they cannot physically be together, brings me hope as a lesbian.

i hope that i too, can find a love that will always look to the sky, thinking of me. a love that will love me unconditionally, the way Sea Fairy loves Moonlight. a love that can bring me peace and comfort, the way that Moonlight does for Sea Fairy.

#moon.txt #seamoon #sorry theres SO MUCH more i could talk about but. Here

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schizowitchic · 1 month

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re: the last post i reblogged i am now going to rant about biphobia i have experienced and am experiencing! yay /s

(under a cut bc this got way too long)

so in secondary school i was in a friend group full of queer people, majority of whom were bisexual girls (at the time. a couple are now nonbinary / asexual) . and they were very big on the whole "bisexual culture is liking every woman and 2 men" thing, a lot of "ew men" jokes, and all in all general "liking women is better than liking men" "why am i dating a gross icky man i should be with a woman".

now i am more attracted to men than women, not by much, its typically fairly equal, but i definitely have a leaning towards men. and i repressed that for AGES. because it simply was "frowned upon", so to speak, from almost everyone i was close with

(for further context for the rest of this. i am not out as genderfluid. i use she/her pronouns irl and ppl know me as a cis woman. i am not really out as aromantic, when i identified as aroace i did tell a few people but i think they either completely ignored me or forgot. lol.)

nowadays, i tell my friends i am bisexual. one in particular always seems to forget, constantly calling me gay/lesbian, assuming i have no opinion or that my opinion will be "ew no" when she asks if i find a man she likes hot. (she has told me so many times "why am i asking you this you don't even like men". i have told her i am bisexual several times) (she also thinks it's funny to call me & another friend "f-slurs" . she says that not the actual word but still. i have to find it funny bc she gets so defensive if we imply she's homophobic)

(i do call myself gay bc i consider none of my attraction ever to be straight. i have no major issues with being called a lesbian apart from the fact that. yknow. im not a lesbian and have never identified as such)

i made a post a while back saying something like "help im being biseuxal erasured". because i am!! i am stuck in yet another situation with people who are either mainly attracted to women/only attracted to women/don't often talk about their attraction to me & also two cishet girls who are attracted to men in a very different way than i am (one of whom erases the fact i am attracted to men and the other who i don't like and probably assumes i'm a lesbian bc of how often everyone else says that)

also full of "ew men" jokes!!. might i add.

i literally have no space to talk about the way i experience attraction, i have to water it down and pretend i only like women, pretend i am interested in romance, pretend i feel attraction when the occasioanll bout of extreme sex-repulsion hits, take (albeit censored) homophobic slurs, sex jokes about me & another female friend that are getting uncomfortable.

and pretend like the main perpretatror of this isn't being at all queerphobic. (she also has massive racism and antisemitism issues. although my friend did throw basically a whole book at her face when she made a really bad joke). to the point where i no longer consider her a friend but i can't say that bc then im overreacting and i'll get the same bullying ostracisation treatment & my friends are still gonna hang out w her so i can't avoid it

people wonder why i am aplatonic when throughout friendships i have experienced: making fun of me to my face & behind my back, bullying, homophobia, biphobia, aphobia, ableism .

like what the fuck. im sick and fucking tired of having nowhere safe to express my sexuality bc let's be real, the internet often isn't the best space.

ive made my peace with either having to compromise my aromanticism or my allosexuality irl (ie either be out as bisexual or out as aroace) but apparently i can't even freely be bisexual without people making assumptions and at this point im just waiting it out until i can hit restart and try make new friends

#biphobia #homophobia #long post #aphobia #queerphobia #bisexual #im aware some of my wording may be misinterpreted . im struggling to explain this #as you may be able to tell from the longwindedness #having friends is exhausting and stressful #aplatonic #aromantic #personal #rant #nyxie be quiet challenge

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