Silly old people

"Can't say for sure as I thankfully haven't been through that particular experience, but I imagine gettin' shot in the bollocks has gotta be one of the worst pains ever."

More Than An Intern (Tony Stark X Daughter!Reader) *PARENTAL

Characters: Tony Stark X Daughter!Reader

Universe: Marvel, Avengers

Warnings: Mention of drug addiction, child abandonment

Request: Imagine: Tony has a daughter in a one night stand when he's 21. He doesn't know of the kid's existence. Mom has post-partum depression, struggles financially, becomes an addict and sells the baby to random guy (he works for Hydra and knows that the kid is Tony's-It's an extension of Project Insight and they wanna train people with brilliant ppl DNA). Around Ironman 1 and 2, she gets inside Stark Industries as an intelligent intern and Natasha catches her spying and the rest is left to you. 😊

The silence in the stairway where you were sat against the wall between floors was deafening, so quiet that you were certain that if someone was to step into it they’d hear your heartbeat from the top floor. You could definitely hear it, so loud that it was like standing beside a speaker at a concert, but you tried to act calm and collected like any other day, hunched over your phone, a half eaten sandwich in hand, like you did every other day in this internship that you had been working for the past 3 months.

Nothing to raise suspicion. Nothing to make anyone think you were up to anything. Nothing to make anyone think you’re a spy.

You weren’t entirely sure why you were so nervous about this. You’d done similar things before in the past despite your age, but this was a much larger project for you. You were stealing weapon blueprints and plans from one of the greatest minds and also in one of the most secure buildings you’d ever seen. Normally you would be able to do a simple sneak in and out within an hour, but you quickly realised that this would be a case of sneaking in, hiding in plain sight, not raising suspicion, gaining their trust, gathering the intel, and then sticking around a while afterwards instead of booking it to maintain that trust and also to get them off your scent and tie up any loose ends if needs be. You couldn’t mess this up. They’d kill you. 

After finishing your sandwich, you checked the clock on your phone, having memorised the routine of those who use the lab just down those stairs, and knew it would be empty now. You packed your things up, before heading down the steps, going through the door at the end and into the hallway. You tried not to look around too much, instead heading straight to the lab door, going on your phone, and after clicking a few buttons you glanced up at the camera in the corner of the room, seeing it power down, before you walked to the door, finding it unlocked and letting yourself in. You wasted no time in searching the space quickly for anything important, not wanting to focus your time on something and as your leaving realise you’d missed something even more valuable. You spotted Tony’s desk as well as some of his suits in the corner in the midsts of construction and repairs. Seeing no cabinets, you walked over to the desk looking over everything on the table- papers, blueprints, and the interface instead of computer. Unfortunately for you, you knew that to get in you’d have to temporarily disengage JARVIS to get inside unnoticed, so that was down, so you were relying on the physical copies, which luckily it seemed that Tony had out- usually to show to the ‘old people’ like Mr Rogers and the God who you kept away from. You looked over the papers, not moving any of them, just looking for anything of importance. You saw design ideas for his suits, suits that didn’t exist yet, designs for their unique abilities- notably weapons that fit in your hand. Bingo. 

“What’cha doing?” The voice made you jump a little, eyes shooting up to the door of the lab, seeing a familiar red head leant against it with a smirk, arms crossed. You of course knew who she was- Natasha Romanoff, one of the most deadly assassins in the word, and she just caught you somewhere where you didn’t have clearance. 

“Oh- I’m so sorry- I was looking for Mr Stark. My clearance pass keeps messing up and my supervisor didn’t know how to fix it so I hoped he’d be able to…” You switched to the personality you’d perfected the last 3 months, a shy, anxious, fly on the wall girl fresh out of college, eager to learn and a goody-two-shoes… okay some of those traits might have already been yours, but it just selled the character. “And now I’m saying it aloud I realise that’s… stupid. Sorry. I’ll go.” You tried to excuse, but as you went to rush out embarrassed, she stepped in front of you, making you halt. She glared down at you, and you shrunk into yourself. “I’m really sorry, I won’t come in here again, I promise.” She raised an eyebrow at you, before grabbing your arm, pulling it out, showing her your phone, and she plucked it from your hand. She removed the case off the back, turning it over, showing the small chip on the back- a small tracking device that also sent all info on the phone to another location. HYDRA. You were anxious before, but the second her eyes landed on the chip, it vanished. You’d failed your mission, and now it was a lose- lose situation, all options probably ending in you tortured or dead, or both. Now, you were terrified. 

Her eyes came back up to meet yours, and it felt like she was reading you like a book, dissecting you piece by piece. She knew your name was fake, your background fake, your credentials fake.The person she’d seen around the tower didn’t exist, and now she was piecing together who you really were. A Hydra agent. A young one at that- she thought you looked a bit young for 23, but clearly had at least some decent skills to have snuck under her nose and get past Tony’s security checks for months. “Are you going to co-operate?” She inquired. 

“I don’t have a choice.” You huffed, dropping the act. The red head grabbed your arm, leading you out of the lab and to the elevator, taking you up to the floor where the meeting rooms were (why Tony needed more than one you never knew), shoving you into one of them, sitting you down in one of the chairs. “JARVIS?” She called, hoping that the AI would still be working here. 

“How may I be of assistance Miss Romanoff? I am aware that I seem to have lost connection to Mr Stark’s lab-”

“I’m also aware of that. Please let Mr Stark know immediately that I’ve caught an undercover agent in his lab- that was why you’ve been locked out.” Natasha interrupted the AI, not wanting to waste any time. “I’m keeping her in one of the meeting rooms.” 

“Of course Miss Romanoff.” The AI responded. You slumped into your seat, chin resting on your chest as you kept your eyes on Natasha who guarded the door to ensure you didn’t make a run for it, and it wasn’t long till you could see Tony Stark through the glass walls of the room, and he looked back at you as he came into the room.

“So, who’s this little troublemaker, Romanoff?” Tony asked her as she shut the door behind him and locked the door. 

“Undercover agent, probably HYDRA, it’s their usual style, though I think this one has been here a while… JARVIS?” Natasha called again. 

“Our files say she’s been working here for 3 months. I’ve done a deeper background check on her files and it seems she does not exist, and is using a fake identity.” JARVIS answered. Your eyes were kept on Natasha after Tony entered the room- she was the deadly one, one of the main ones they had warned you about, and your eyes were focussed on her so closely you didn’t spot Tony stalking closer till he stepped in front of you, blocking your line of sight on the woman, and squatting down in front of you. In that moment, your fear of Natasha seemed to diminish as Tony looked at you like a disapproving parent or something. You felt almost ashamed. Almost.

“What’s your name? Your real name?” He asked you. You paused, not answering him. “Don’t make this difficult. If you cooperate then we-” 

“Are you going to kill me?” You asked, interrupting him. Your question seemed to catch him off guard as he straightened his posture a little, blinking a bit. 

“No. Of course not.” He spoke confidently, but also bewildered, which gave you some comfort that he was probably telling you the truth. “Is that what they told you? That if you failed this mission they put you on you’d be killed by us?” 

“Or them… You caught me, if they find out they’ll kill me.” You spoke lowly and oddly calmly despite how terrifying that thought was. 

“Were you in the Red Room?” Natasha inquired to you. It was something she remembered being told when she went on missions before she graduated, a way to control her and the others, and it seemed to line up with your age, but you shook your head. “How long have you worked for HYDRA?” She asked instead, and she caught you swallowing in response. 

“Better question, how old are you?” Tony asked. “I’m not sure if you have a baby face or if you’re actually a child.” 

“I’m not a kid.” You huffed. 

“That’s something a kid would say. More specifically a teen.” He responded. “Especially a teen who’s close to no longer being one and wants to be seen as an adult. 16? 17?” He questioned, and when your eyes averted at the second guess, he knew he hit the jackpot. He knew from his own guessing that you were a kid, but to actually confirm it seemed to light something inside of him, a sort of despair and fury. You were a kid, a kid with training that would have taken years, and the brainwashing they’d ingrained in you to make you think they’d kill you is something they’d have to have put into your head at a young age. So young you knew nothing of the outside world. “Do you know anything other than HYDRA? Parents? Siblings?” He asked far more softly, tilting his head a little.

“...I had a mom. She gave me to them.” You answered him in barely a whisper. 

“How old were you when she did that?” He asked, getting a shrug in response. “So young. Really young, probably younger than 4, maybe a baby or a toddler?” He asked, and you nodded. Your sudden willingness to respond to his questions didn’t go unnoticed, and Tony knew he had unlocked a way to get you to open up- softness and kindness, something you probably hadn’t seen… ever. “Do you know what her name was? Or what she called you?” He asked.

“I don’t know her name, but HYDRA called me Y/N, so I think that’s my name.” You answered him. 

“Alright. I really want to find out more about you so I can help you, okay? Would you be okay if we get Dr Banner here so he can get a few swabs and maybe some blood to try and find out more about you? Who knows, maybe you have some siblings or some grandparents wondering where their granddaughter is and we can give you a fake name and you can start afresh, alright?” He suggested to you, and when he didn’t get a disagreement, he turned to Natasha, standing up. “Let’s up security to ensure she’s safe.” 

The next couple of hours were admittedly quite boring. You were placed into a holding cell, searched for other weapons or technology, Dr Banner came, took some swabs from your mouth and some blood, and Natasha quizzed you about your entire time under HYDRA, what you had worked on prior, names you remembered and the sort of thing they put you through. Admittedly, you weren’t very talkative with her- she was quite stern and cold with you, and you were expecting that as soon as she got her answers she’d just put a bullet between your eyes, which was why you purposely kept some of your own information from her. Inevitably she gave up and left you be, and after another half an hour of boredom, you tried to get comfy, eventually finding yourself resting your head on the cold table in front of you, and closing your eyes, drifting uncomfortably between sleep and enough conscious to know when someone was walking by your cell, and it was enough to know when the door opened. Your eyes opened, your head already turned to see the door, letting you see it was Tony stepping in, stopping when he saw your eyes on him, before he shut the door behind him and moved to sit down as well, and only then you raised your head to look at him. You noted the slip of paper in front of him, which was odd since he usually liked to keep things digitalised, though he took one glance at it before placing it face down so you couldn’t read it.

“Did you find anything?” You asked him, his eyes looking up to meet yours, and you immediately knew from the emotions swimming in them, he had. There was a heavy feeling of guilt emitting from him, weighing his eyes down and making it hard for him to meet yours, and you knew it wasn’t good news. “If it makes you feel any better, I have no memories of my life before HYDRA, so I have no emotional ties. I’m not gonna cry.” You tried to assure him, mostly hoping he’d just spit it out. He cleared his throat finally, leaning on the table, resting his arms on the piece of paper. 

“You had a mother.” He started, and your mind immediately noted the past tense. 

“Dead?” 

“Complications due to drug use. A few years ago.” He confirmed. “She formed the addiction a few weeks or months after your birth- I got records of your birth, they gave her a blood test then and she was clean and healthy. It was probably Postpartum Depression that led her there, and after your birth there’s no trace of you, so you weren’t taken by social services, or reported missing…”

“So she handed me over to them? Is that what you’ve established?” You inquired, sticking to your word and not showing emotion, remaining calm and collected and cold, and Tony nodded, his eyes dropping again, the guilt he was emitting seeming to only weigh heavier. 

“I knew her… your mom.” He admitted after a pause, still not looking up. “Before she had you, before she… I knew her when we were in university together. She was studying something else in a different building, I don’t remember what, I never really got to know her despite the fact that…” He seemed to catch himself before he said anything, shuffling in his seat, and his nervousness was starting to rub off on you as you shuffled in your own seat, crossing your arms against your chest, not sure what he was getting at. Did HYDRA know he knew your mother? If so, why did they send you to do this mission? Why does that matter? 

“How is this relevant?” You asked him blankly. 

“We were…” He seemed to stumble over his words, before he rethought the, and spoke again. “We were able to track down a paternal line as well, and that proved that you’re… mine.” He confirmed, and it was like there was a flick of a switch, and you felt the change both in the room and in your body. Ah. That was why he was so anxious all of a sudden. His eyes stayed on you, but remained quiet, waiting for a reaction, though you weren’t giving him much. Your expression barely changed, with no signs of shock or joy or sadness or anything, other than confusion, judging by your eyebrows coming closer together. 

“That doesn’t make sense. Why would HYDRA send me to do a mission involving you if they knew we were father and daughter?” You asked him. 

“I don’t think they knew. We don’t know what kind of detail your mom gave about your background before handing you to them, or if she even knew I was your father to begin with. But that doesn’t matter right now- what matters now is that you’re here, you’re safe, and you’re my top priority right now. I need to keep you hidden to the best of my ability until we can even convince HYDRA it’s a lost cause to go after you, or think you’re dead.” 

“So, a safe house?”

“Exactly. I’ve got this little cabin on the edge of a lake that surrounded by woodland, little to no internet connection, it’s practically hidden from a birds eye view. I’ll up security there, but I’ll have it excused by me also being there as a sort of getaway with me and Pepper. That’ll also let us get to properly know each other, see where we stand, what you’re comfortable with and how involved you’d like me to be. If at the end of the time there you decide you want to go and do your own thing I understand, I’ll support you with whatever you want to do. If you want to go live in a tiny town in Wyoming then I’ll find you a nice place there and I’ll just want to keep tabs on you to ensure you’re safe. If you want to make up for lost time, go to college and live with us until you’re ready to go, then I’m happy with that.” He explained, almost rambling in nature, but it brought a faint smile, but a smile none the less to your face. 

“Thank you.” You interrupted him, making him stop, and relax a little and smile back. 

Hope you like it! If you have any questions, please send them in! 

*Not my gif

TAGS:  @klanceiscannon14​ @marvelhoeingismyhobby-blog @bellamyblakemorley @dummiesshort  @freyathehuntress @abbybills22-blog @mutantjediavenger @theoraekensnotsosecretlover @alicedanganh @sleutherclaw @sleepy-coffee-bean @stawwpp  @courtneychicken  @graysonmalfoy @bellero @originalpottervengerlock @supernatural-pan @esoltis280 @lady-of-lies @lenaswritingandstuff @macbetheliza @mandywholock1980 @cdwmtjb8 @caswinchester2000 @determinedpines @huntheimpossible @automaticbakeryfreakshoe

*presents u my dick grayson hcs like ur @ my garage sale* (dick hcs #1?)

♡ this

♡ hes a passenger princess(no this is cannon whoopsie)

♡ dick is like the first girl 2 b killed in a slaughter movie, but just as a 27-ish yr old adult man

♡ draws on a beauty mark in a different spot everytime & gaslights any1 who asks about it -"hey wasnt ur beauty mark under ur other eye?" -"idk i cant see my own face"

♡ hes always losing his hairties bc he keeps shooting them @ ppl -& rubberbands 4 that matter

♡ we dont talk about the skin grip example -it involves a lot of falling & a lot of crashing -if ykyk

♡ dick usually has a twix in his pocket, but in order 2 get it u have 2 guess if its a left or right twix -he also respectfully keeps the left twin in his left pocket & the right twix in the right pocket

♡ he never believed in santa claus but is terrified that watermelon will grow inside him if he swallows the seeds

♡ not rlly a hc but hes vry mcdonals girl toy coded

♡ says "fuck it we ball" b4 jumping in2 a drug ring

♡ the hardest hes laughed in a while was @ a bucket falling over

♡ "masculine but in a peacock way" quotes,,,,,

♡ makes hot chocolate in a pot -refuses 2 make it in a mug it HAS 2 b done on the stove or its not the same

♡ knows how to do his make-up but doesnt know the name of the product he uses -foundation? no thats just my face paint

♡ if u ask him 2 draw, hell say "i cant even draw a straight line!"

♡ dick; *pulls out sticker sheet* *puts mlp sticker some1s face*

♡ swallowed grapes/blue berries whole as a kid bc he didnt know better -didnt chew them*

♡ dicks fav turtle is leo

♡ fixates on tinkering w/his bits & bots

♡ wears crocs -"y do u wear crocs?" -dick; kicks in their direction so the croc hits theyre face

♡ eyeballs measurements(like cooking) -until it comes 2 clothes, then its ultra mega super duper whopper popper deluxe edition focus

♡ h8s grippy socks -the textures weird + attracts halys hair(as if all socks wouldnt but-) -prolly h8s socks in gen

♡ had 2 have snorted pixie stick as a kid -i am such a believer that every kid has done this so he will 2 -as a dare @ LEAST

♡ when hes angry he plops 1 of those sweet cough drops in his mouth 2 chew on just so that he doesnt go off -any hard candy works 2 -he needs 1 of those chewie chewables

♡ biting/chewing hcs bc it needs a separate category @ this point -keeps chewing on earbuds -h8s biting his nails actually -no pen or pencil or eraser is safe -loves biting but h8s when his food is 2 chewy/has 2 bite harder than usual -has more than 1nce caught himself about 2 chew on electrical wire -bites ppl he loves 2 show appreciation/love nom -(i will defend this goddamn hc till the day i die)

♡ pizza bagels -if ur confused, come see me after class

♡ titans have basically banned horror movies from movie nights bc dick would complain about the gore/physics/traps/mo/literally anything 'inaccurate' -"dick its just a movie" "U DONT UNDERSTAND."

♡ has the most social media followers out of batfam but only posts 1nce a month(sometimes not) -its just a picture of his half eaten cereal captioned "beautiful day today"

♡ titians walked in on him doing a backbend & thought some1 murdered him(not 4 vry long though cause oviously he was alive i just like the thought of some1 like roy when he 1st joined the team walking in & doing the most dramatic gasp ever)

♡ listen, i like contortionist dick -its fun & silly

♡ takes 'cringe' as a compliment

♡ "ur mature 4 ur age!" dick; "let me fix that real quick"

♡ hair grows vry quickly

♡ h8s functioning labels(i mean we all should but yk)

♡ skilled in bingo

♡ over buys treats 4 haly -& toys

♡ insane internal clock -kinda ties in; tells ppl specific times -"meet me @ 2;37 pm" as an example

♡ comic sans enjoyer(literally stole from ttg but shhhhhh)

♡ more invested in presidential gay love affairs than WW1 or 2

♡ hes about yay high

♡ hyperfixates on languages istg

i literally could go on 4ever bc my brain is that highway in germany but i wont i regret nothing

pt 2 <- if i make 1 lol

The pdudes at bingo night

P1- The old ladies won’t stop pinching his cheeks and telling him how handsome he is and how they don’t know how he doesn’t have a girlfriend by now. One mean lady tells him to cut his hair. He gets gifts from the old ppl a lot.

P2- is taking all the old people candy he can find. Is somehow cheating. And he’s lowkey jealous of all the praise p1 is getting.

P3- is looking for a dilf.

P4- is the only one who’s normal about bingo nights. When he wins & he cheers, champ gets excited and p4 will hold champs front paws while they ‘dance’ together

Happy Friday!!! from the trope bingo card, "in a cabin in a middle of a snow storm" - Cullen and whoever you want? bonus if his book collection becomes relevant in some way 👀

Okay so first of all THANK YOU for this prompt because it was hilarious to write. Last week, I was sitting here thinking about who I could do this with and my brain immediately went to Cullen/Lavellan in my current fic timeline bc there’s nothing funnier than ppl who hate each other being forced to huddle for warmth HOWEVER in the spirit of challenging myself, here’s Cullen being awkward and Bull being…himself. (PS there's no snowstorm, just very cold rain and a cabin in the Fallow Mire lololol) @dadrunkwriting this post is brought to you by tequila

***

“Really comin’ down out there, huh?” Bull stood—hunched, rather; the cabin was too small for him and his horns—and stared out the window, sipping his flask and soaking the floor with wet clothes he seemed in no hurry to change out of. 

“Indeed, it is,” Cullen muttered, scrambling to free himself from the horrendous texture of wet socks clinging to damp skin. 

He searched the abandoned room for blankets, towels, old cloth—anything to stave off the bone-deep freeze of a rainy night in Ferelden. Everything was covered in a layer of dust, and he coughed as he shook it loose from an old quilt chewed to bits by whatever critters made it their home before he and Bull arrived. It was big enough for all of him, or maybe one of Bull’s legs.

“Here.” He thrust it in Bull’s direction. “I may have another rolled up in my pack.”

Bull’s shoulders shook with laughter as he pinched the cloth between his thumb and forefinger, like a handkerchief. “Thanks, Commander. But I think I’ll manage.” 

“Suit yourself,” Cullen said. He rifled through his pack, mumbling curses under his breath. Everything was soaked—his tools and spare clothes, the matches, his—

“No, no, no.” He pulled a leatherbound book from the bottom of the pile, shaking his head with furrowed brow. Though the cover survived, rain seeped through to the binding, and the pages were falling out in sopping, haphazard clumps. 

Bull crouched on his heels by Cullen’s side, lips pursed. “You brought…books?”

“Yes, I brought books,” Cullen snapped. “Some of us like to read.” Bull maintained his gaze, brows raised, and took another swig from his flask. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply—”

“Any drawings in these books of yours?” 

“Any…what?” Cullen shook his head. “I’m not following.”  

Bull grinned. “Pictures, Commander.” He peered over Cullen’s shoulder as he tried to reassemble the pages. “Maybe of the naked variety.” 

“Andraste, preserve me.” Cullen pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “No, Bull. There are no pictures of nude women in my book collection.” 

Bull chuckled. “Never said it had to be women.” He stood, took a final drink from his flask, and started undressing. “Can’t believe you brought books to the fucking Fallow Mire.”

Cullen’s cheeks grew hot, both from embarrassment over his penchant for nighttime reading and the abrupt sight of Bull’s naked ass in full view. He knew better than to stare—if Bull caught him, Cullen would never hear the end of it—but when he was at eye level with Bull’s…endowment, it became exceedingly difficult not to. 

“Jealous, or horny?” Bull asked, grinning. 

“Neither. I, erm…” Cullen cleared his throat and averted his gaze. “Well, we should settle in for the night.” He resumed rifling through his pack, inwardly groaning at the sorry state of his books. Why had he brought them to the fucking Fallow Mire, of all places? Perhaps because he knew, per usual, when the group paired off, the Inquisitor would send him out with Bull. The only thing more irksome than Shielan’s juvenile teasing was Bull’s, and the only way to avoid it entirely was to cozy up with a book and ignore him. 

“Those wet clothes are going to give you pneumonia, you know.” Bull kneeled at the fireplace in the center of the house and sighed. “Not a dry log in sight.” 

Shit. He was right. With no fire, no dry clothes, and temperatures that continued to sink, they’d be blocks of ice by morning. “What are you suggesting?” 

Bull took another swig from his flask. “Body heat.” 

Cullen swallowed thickly. “I’m not sure I follow…”

“Sure you do,” Bull said, chuckling. “Listen”—he turned to Cullen, who begged his eyes not to look down—“I don’t know what kind of hang-ups your people have around this sort of thing, but I’m good with it.” 

“Good with…what, exactly?”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” Bull leaned his head back and sighed. “Unless you want to wake up with frozen toes, we have to spoon—naked.” A devilish smirk crossed his face. “Don’t worry, Commander. I’ll let you keep your little blanket.“

Cullen clutched the aforementioned blanket to his chest, eliciting a maniacal cackle from Bull’s throat. He was not a prude. 

...

Fine. He was a bit of a prude. But he hadn’t a great deal of time to devote to bodily pleasures over the years, nor had they been encouraged in his position—and Bull certainly wasn’t making things easier. Perhaps this sort of routine melted the hesitations of women in the tavern. All it did for Cullen was make his muscles clench. 

He huffed a nervous laugh, one hand running down the back of his neck. “You could at least buy me a drink first.” 

Bull howled with laughter, and very nearly choked on his latest gulp of whatever bitter concoction lived in his flask. He slammed a fist into his chest and coughed. “Didn’t think you had it in you, Commander.” 

“I wish you wouldn’t call me that,” Cullen said. “It’s not my title anymore.” 

“Ah.” Bull waved his hand and plopped down next to Cullen. “Consider it a nickname, then.” He looked Cullen up and down, tutting. “Hate to be pushy, but we should probably get this thing going before your tiny body gives out from the cold.”

Cullen wrinkled his nose. “I am not tiny.”

Bull gave him a little pat on the back. “You’re all tiny to me.” 

“Fair enough.” Cullen cleared his throat, searching for what to say. “If you could just…erm…” He twirled his finger in a circle. 

Another ripple of laughter shook Bull’s body, but he obliged, and turned away. “By all means, take your time. I’m not freezing my ass off or anything.” 

“I’ll be quick about it,” Cullen muttered, and he meant it. The sooner he got undressed, the sooner they could get this over with. 

“Hand me your clothes and I’ll hang them up.”

Cullen shoved each article into Bull’s waiting hand without checking to see if he’d turned his head. Maybe he peeked and maybe he hadn’t. Knowing would make Cullen no less embarrassed. 

As Bull threw their clothes over someone’s old dresser, Cullen shook the blanket a second time—how was it still so dusty?—and settled onto the floor.

“Not the bed?” Bull asked. 

“Well no, I…” Cullen cleared his throat again. “I assumed you wouldn’t fit. No offense.” 

“None taken,” Bull said, and Cullen breathed a sigh of relief—he could hear the grin in the Qunari’s voice. “You ready for me?”

Maker, was he? When was the last time he’d touched another? Long enough for him to forget. Long enough for him to forget what it felt like to yearn for it. It’s only a matter of practicality, he told himself, which was true! There was no need to stress himself over what boiled down to survival. 

“Come on, then.” He waved Bull over, back turned to avoid his eyes, and prayed there’d be no further comments about his “tiny” body. Then again, he’d assumed the position of the smaller spoon without question, so perhaps his comrade had a point. 

Bull sank to the floor and reclined alongside him. He did so quietly, his movements soft and careful, and pulled Cullen closer, until skin met skin. He wrapped his arm around Cullen’s body, palm pressed against his chest, and Cullen’s breath quickened. 

He felt trapped, suffocated all the sudden, like the room was closing in. His body shook harder, and he clenched his jaw, fighting the irrational urge to struggle. 

Bull loosened his grip. “Easy, Commander,” he murmured. “I’m not going to bite. Unless you’re into that sort of thing.”

Cullen forced himself to laugh until it felt real. “I might be, if you ever get around to buying me that drink.” 

Over the next hour, the Qunari distracted him with absurd stories he’d never believe if he didn’t know Bull, tales that encouraged questions and kept him laughing until his muscles unfurled, and he allowed himself to settle into the warm reprieve Bull’s body provided. It wasn’t until his eyelids grew heavy that Cullen realized how easily he'd been disarmed by a Ben-Hassrath. But maybe that was okay. He was warm, and he was safe.

Maybe it would all be okay.

Theres this post on reddit where some dream anti is all "why would dream choose to go party with 18 year olds instead of ppl his own age"

Im past the drinking age in my country, why am i drinking peach juice instead of wine?

Because i want to, simple

imagine trying to go to any party with no 18 year olds like sure let him go to wine night at the local bingo club. bffr

Would u ever analyse/write about peter bipolar stuff bc i see so many ppl psychoanalyse daniil but i just want to put the stamatins in a lab and examine them anyway i saw ur peter daniil bingo thing and i think manic depressive peter is so real and we should spread the word and there isnt enough peter content maybe daniil can b there too so yh what do u think about petrs brain ??...... umm im a little weird from many painkillers but i hope this makes sense

bipolar peter ask part 2 -- but also i think p1 petr is so different from p2 peter kind of a bigger different than most other characters   [[like peter1 is still consumed by his vision and a pretty wizard and insane utopian but p2 peter is more tired disillusioned ready to be a dilf]]]  so  like man they might need to be separated if analysed  but anyway hes got problems  ❤️

soooo i am trying to answer this for the second time. tumblr’s new ask formatting kind of fucked up when i tried to insert the few screenshots i thought explained peter’s mental state. so here’s peter thoughts... 2!

i don’t really have the screenshots required to make a lengthy meta post about peter’s mental health issues on the scale of my daniil & autism analysis - though i doubt any analysis i write will quite surpass that - and even less for classic peter, but i do have a few thoughts.

i think a lot about peter’s state of mind because he’s probably my favorite utopian. which isn’t to say that i dislike the others (except georgiy), but peter holds a special place in my heart because i really relate to that depression he’s got going on. i like to think of peter as bipolar type ii, because the depression seems more pronounced. i also think it’s a good balance with andrey, who i hc as having bipolar type i. in contrast to peter’s depression, andrey has the irritability and impulsivity of a manic episode (i mean, he’s walking around without a shirt while there’s a sentient plague outside. shout out to everyone who’s walked around in the freezing cold in tank tops and shorts because they were (hypo)manic)

Peter: We don’t see eye to eye, the Judge and I. He argued taht the Tower was never their family’s crowning achievement... merely mine. And I concur. It was my crown. I’ve hit the ceiling...

i know the tower’s creation and existence is the source of much speculation and i’ve seen and liked a lot of what i read that people have had to say about it, the role it plays in the story, and the role it plays in peter’s depression. but i think it’s also fair to read it as something he may have created and feels he can’t replicate because he was hypo/manic at the time and has since crashed. once while hypomanic i was writing 5k a day like it was nothing, and when i finished the project and the episode i became overwhelmed with grief, like i would never write again. i think this hypothesis is supported by the fact that he and andrey obviously have created many fantastic things - they reference the dancing bridge and i think the other two are the cold hall and the house house? it’s late so lol if i got the names wrong - so clearly those unfinished stairways are not all there is. and he’s inspired again when he temporarily has custody of grace, so clearly he can and will create again, with or without the polyhedron.

Peter: You know, old boy, I was never persecuted for my genius. Nor was I prosecuted for murder. And yet, it turns out all this was my hell after all.

Voice line: Life is a night at the bar. All the wisdom you gain, you pay for in pain.

i think one of my friends w bipolar suggested that the way he interacts with his creations hints at psychosis, but that's something i'd be ill-equipped to discuss as i don't experience psychosis. his paranoia that farkhad and andrey are mad at him, though...

Peter: I wonder how long my tower will hold. I wonder if Farkhad forgave me... if Brother is angry with me... I wonder about many things.

this screenshot isn’t exactly proof of anything, but he definitely seems wrapped up in mistakes that he’s made in the past in a way that feels familiar. at some point in time all the mental illnesses become inextricable, but there’s a lot i’ve felt i’ve lost to the bizarre shit i’ve done while strugging w bipolar disorder and i think the regret is real. not to mention the significant comorbidity of bipolar disorder and anxiety disorders. and the high rate (70%, according to this) of comorbidity between bipolar disorder and substance use disorder

Peter: A lot. I have to quit drinking, but I don’t have any willpower left.

peter clearly has a lot less faith in his potential for recovery and it makes me wonder if he’s tried to get sober before and failed.

also i tend to mash my characterizations together when writing fic because i look at the two games as accompaniments of each other - especially as we only have one route of p2 so far. but i do think p2 peter seems slower and sadder than classic peter. i think they’re different symptoms of the same illness though... maybe when i get around to replaying bachelor route i’ll take more screenshots of peter and formulate more thoughts on his mental illness but boy. he’s got it.

thank u for the ask!! i love talking n thinking about this kinda stuff.

late fee

jeon jeongguk x (f) reader

summary: “Captain Underpants isn’t glorified by all the tryhards, so when I pick those books, you’re unknowingly more interested in me.” tags: f2l, flirty kook, jk’s obsession w/captain underpants, he’s a fuckboy but he’s a soft fuckboy dont get it twisted, campus boy crush jk(yes again), jk abuses the FuCK out of pet names, miss koo1aid actually writes some PLOT warnings: much flirting, nsfw bc of a lot of heavy petting, pussy eatin’, a lil dirty talk, very s l i g h t coochie sniffing, BUT!!! protected sex :) wc: 10.3k

i wrote another fic (applause) and the entire thing is based off my belief that jungkook 10000% would enjoy captain underpants books. not proofread bc i am a hermit and speak to exactly 0 ppl on here, que dios los bendiga

“Helloooo, sexy librarian,” Jeongguk says the moment he steps through the door, lopsided grin adorning his features as he swaggers over to obnoxiously lean against your desk. You can’t even pretend you didn’t see him, his presence so blaringly consuming, and evident in the way some dorky high schoolers glance over to gawk at him.

“What book are you checking out today, Jeon?” You muse instead, leaving your desk chair to head over to the stack of new books that needed to be stamped. As you turn, Jeongguk whistles at the sight, and you don’t even have it in you anymore to retort back the same way you would when he first started bugging you. “Also, are you aware that your copy of Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants is due tomorrow? It’s a dollar for every day it’s late—”

“You needn’t worry longer, baby,” Jeongguk interrupts, and the loud smack of a hardcover against the desk catches your attention. There lies Jeongguk’s Captain Underpants book, alongside the paperback copy of Beloved that has definitely seen better days.

You furrow your brows. “When did you check out this one?” You question, checking the spine to make sure the book belongs to your library. Much to your surprise, there’s no barcode on the side, and no stamp on the inside.

Your question goes unanswered as Jeongguk jumps into a full-length novella recapture of the hot frat party he’d been to last weekend, and how the Zeta Theta Psi guys knew how to party. That Jimin fellow that Jeongguk frequently mentions had apparently snorted a line of coke off their friend Seokjin’s broad shoulders just to prove his friend had godly proportions. It’s weird, but Jeongguk says it’s because you have to ride for your bros. You try to act uninterested, but Jeongguk’s a funny guy, really, and you can only hide so many chuckles with the sound of a stamp.

He’s in the middle of trying to cover up of one of his frequent trysts after accidentally exposing himself—”Don’t get it twisted, baby, I just took her upstairs to call her friend.”—when Namjoon comes out of the back room looking for you. He barely glances at your guest, before handing you a list of overdue books.

“Would you mind calling these people?” He asks, voice soft, just as everything else was about Namjoon. “They’re all a week past.”

“Yikes,” you say, eyes scanning over the list. Surprisingly, Jeongguk is still there, hovering over you as if waiting for you to dismiss him. “Do you mind, Jeon?” You say, channeling your best customer service voice. As much as Namjoon was wary of him, he still considered Jeongguk a patron in your establishment and hated to see him treated poorly, no matter how many library rules Jeongguk broke.

“Of course,” he sighs, and you miss the hostile glare he throws Namjoon when you whirl around for a highlighter. “I’ll see you later, sweetheart,” he says when you turn back around, stretching ana rm in your direction.

Half of you knows exactly what he’ll do, but the other half of you, the one trying desperately to act like his advances have no effect on you, have you placing your palm in his. You’re not super surprised when he tugs your hand upward, pecking your knuckles with a flirty wink. “Adios, Juliet,” he smirks.

“Wrong language,” you inform him, rolling your eyes nonchalantly even though your heart is beating one hundred miles per second. Jeongguk cackles, loud as all hell in the silent library, before making his exit.

It’s silent for all of twenty seconds before Namjoon jumps right into it. “So are you seeing him, or…” he interrogates, trying to act like he’s hardly interested, but you’ve known and worked alongside Namjoon long enough to know he’s secretly the community gossip.

You ignore him, choosing to jam the buttons on the phone instead.

The weird thing about Jeongguk, was that, although he was notoriously known amongst the undergraduates (and even some graduates, because he just had it like that, you suppose) as one of the biggest fuckboys, he was different. Not to sound like every teen romcom you’d ever scanned, but he genuinely was. For starters, he’d fuck your brains out and then make you his best friend the morning after. He definitely had a very peculiar, and backwards, way of doing the whole one night stand thing.

All this you’ve gathered from your friends, who, at one point have had some sort of encounter with Jeongguk. Dahyun’s was last spring at a club event, when he’d oh so smoothly flirted with her for a solid hour before realizing she didn’t swing that way. Which is how they become close friends, which is how, by association, Jeongguk set his sights on you.

Your introduction to Jeongguk wasn’t anything out of the ordinary; he’d been tagging along behind Dahyun like a lost puppy, begging her for some class notes, and had subsequently followed her all the way to your favorite meeting place. From then, he’d dropped his petulant, childish act and put on his macho face, chest puffed and eyes hooded as he devoured your very presence.

The next time you see him, it’s at a frat party where some guy had been harping on you go upstairs with him. Another weird thing about Jeongguk, he hated when other fuckboys didn’t utilize their brains. You assume it’s because it gives the fuckboy community a bad rep as a whole, but Jeongguk hated when guys were overbearing. So he’d taken the initiative to snatch you away from that fellow, guiding you all the way back to Dahyun and friends just to make sure you were alright. Somewhere along the way, you’d informed him you worked at the local library—”The one that does bingo on Tuesdays?” “That’s for senior citizens only, why do you know that?”—and he’d never left you alone again.

This time, he spots you in the dining hall.

“You come here often, dollface?” He says the moment he slides up beside you, instantly zeroing in on the burrito wrap on your plate. Like the little immature baby he is, his hand immediately snakes out to touch the precariously wrapped white tortilla holding the deliciousness inside, and you have to physically slap the offender away. He jumps, bumping into a girl standing in line behind him, not that particularly cares. “So, it’s fuck Jeongguk hours, huh?” He huffs, adorning his face with that uppity glare he mastered from watching Mean Girls on repeat a few months ago.

“Your plate is stacked, but you wanna grab the one thing on mine,” you point out, and his lips curl into a smile at your response. “By the way, your book is past due.”

At this he gasps, all real, no Regina George effects added. “You’re lying,” he chokes, switching his plate to his other hand, and you nearly jump when the muffin balancing dangerously on top shifts. He tugs his phone out of the pocket of his sweats, scanning through his remind app until he sees that his book is overdue by three days. He groans, staring at the ceiling in shame.

You nod, breezing over his inner meltdown. “Was wondering when we were gonna get the wedgie winner, or whatever its called, back.”

He scoffs, giving you an unimpressed glare. “Wrath of the Wicked Wedgie Woman,” he corrects, looking so disappointed that you don’t have these bizarre titles memorized. “For such a pretty librarian, you sure are ignorant to these literary masterpieces.”

This makes you cackle, and your cheeks flush when at least three people turn to stare at your outburst. “You aren’t seriously calling these Captain Underpants books masterpieces,” you snort. Jeongguk shrugs, and you begin to wonder if he really is as airheaded as the characters he admires. “Jeon,” you try to reason, giving him a pleading look, because arguing the credibility of kids novels in line for lunch simply does not seem real. You must have been warped into another dimension where all pretty boys are as dumb as the movies make them out to seem.

“Listen,” he says, smiling when you grow desperate for him to prove you wrong. “I’ve read a lot of good books, but nothing tops a hypnotized superhero principal fighting crime in his underwear.”

You sigh, paying for your meal, and then, surprisingly, waiting for him to pay for his. You tell yourself it’s because you want to finish this conversation, but part of you just genuinely enjoys being in Jeongguk’s presence. Gag.

“I saw you with Beloved last week,” you carry on the second he’s done giving flirty eyes to the middle-aged cashier. “Now that’s a masterpiece.”

He nods in agreement. “But, baby,” he purrs, and the sudden switch from weird, 12 year-old literary enthusiast to grown as hell, suave bastard has you jolting a step that you try to play off by pretending to look at something on the ground. “How else will you remember my face?”

You blank. “What the hell are you talking about.”

Jeongguk gives you a pointed look. “Sweetheart, you wouldn’t remember a damn thing about me if I did what every other stuck-up bastard did trying to pick up chicks at the library.” You tilt your head in confusion. Jeongguk sighs. “If I went in every rainy Friday and checked out a Tale of Two Cities, or Oliver Twist, or some other Charles Dickens shit, you wouldn’t glance my way.”

“Do people still read Dickens?” You say instead, glossing over the fact that apparently Jeongguk’s visits were apparently blatant attempts to flirt with girls. Finally, you find a suitable spot at a long, dinner table so you don’t have to sit completely alone with Jeongguk.

“You know damn well better than I do that that those wannabe sophisticated books have waitlists.” He shoves half a pizza slice into his mouth, and you hate how your eyes immediately laser in on the strong movements of his jaw. “My point is,” he says through a greasy mouthful. “Captain Underpants isn’t glorified by all the tryhards, so when I pick those books, you’re unknowingly more interested in me.”

You cradle your burrito in your palms, rolling his words around your head for a bit. Jeongguk doesn’t particularly seem like he’s awaiting an answer, munching through the mountain of food on his plate as you revel in your thoughts.

It’s right when you go to take your first bite that you finally come to a conclusion. “But have you ever considered I’m interested in you because I think you’re funny?”

Silence. Jeongguk stares at you through his fringe, pizza slice slowly going limp in his hold as he absorbs your words. Before you know it, his ears flush red. He splutters. “I-You think I’m funny?” He asks, cheeks slowly growing rosy as well, and his lips quirk in a cute way to the side, as if he’s trying desperately to hide his excitement.

You nod, because it’s true, why would you lie? “Duh. You come in every week and just talk about your day, Jeongguk,” you say, as if it’s the most obvious answer in the world. “I think you’re very interesting and entertaining without trying.”

“Thanks,” he mutters, and for the first time, you’re thrown off by how adorable this man looks, lips pressed tight to contain a smile from your compliments.

Realization hits you all at once, but you’ve long since trained in the fluid art of avoiding your emotions.

“There’s a party tonight,” Dahyun announces from her desk, not even bothering to glance at you when you return from the showers. You hum, not really that interested in whatever is going on this fine Thursday evening. You plop down at your own desk, starting your skincare routine.

Dahyun lets you relax in the soothing motions of self care for all of three seconds before she adds, “Jeongguk wanted to know if you’re coming.”

You press down too hard on the pump of your moisturizer, sending a large glomp onto the tips of your fingers. “That’s nice,” you say, trying to play it off, but you doubt Dahyun hadn’t heard the little spaz you had, or that she couldn’t sense the way your body immediately lit aflame at the mention of him and you in the same sentence.

She turns in her seat, and you catch sight of her in your mirror. You avert your eyes right away, because Dahyun had many talents, and her best one was reading your mind with a single gaze. You maintain an aura of unbothered and uninterested, finishing with the rest of your skincare.

Just when you think you’re safe, Dahyun pounces.

“Y’know,” she says, and you can hear the grin in her voice. “He hasn’t slept with anyone in almost a month. In fuckboy time, that’s the equivalent of two years.”

You roll your eyes, putting away your products before trying to busy yourself with anything else. “He probably has, but with people who know how to keep their mouths shut.”

Faintly, you hear Dahyun’s chair scrape against the carpet, and then suddenly she has you in a headlock. “Admit you like Jeongguk or I will throw your toothbrush into the toilet on the third floor.”

You choke, grappling her arms in an attempt to pry her off. “No,” you huff, switching tactics to tangle a hand in her silver locks. “Why would I confess to something that isn’t true?”

She shrieks when you give a sharp tug, sending her careening sideways against the foot of your bed, but not without taking you with her. “You are lying to yourself and to the entire librarian community, you sick fuck.”

You snort. “The fuck does Namjoon have to do with this?”

“He told me Jeongguk’s been bringing you Starbucks.”

Her reveal has you halting in your tracks, cheeks flushing at being exposed. “That gossiping fuck,” you seethe, finally loosening your grip on your friend. Somehow, you’ve ended up sprawled on the floor of her side of the room, nestled into the stupidly fluffy carpet she thrifted. She rolls onto her belly, propping herself up on her elbows to narrow her eyes at you.

“So it’s true,” she sighs. You shrug. “Well,” she claps her hands together. “Shimmy into that sexy dress from Windsor, we’re going out.”

You groan, rolling over in metaphorical agony. “Dude, I just washed my face. No way in hell, I’m putting on makeup now.” She considers your point for negative three seconds.

“The Glow Kit is in my bottom left drawer,” she announces right as she exits the room with her towel and shower essentials in hand.

The Glow Kit is in fact in Dahyun’s drawer, which is a little suspicious considering it’s the same one you thought you lost three months ago. Nonetheless, it never lets you down, and by the time you’re done with your makeup, you’re looking like a shimmering, little succubus in the hot dress from Windsor.

Normally, you and your self-esteem were rivals; never on the same page, always bickering, sworn enemies from birth. But right now, as you admire yourself in the closet mirror, you can’t help but marvel at how good you look in the slightly loose dress.

“Damn,” Dahyun says as soon as she returns, all fluffy in her towel. “You will fuck tonight, or else.”

“Hey, baby,” Jeongguk smiles at you the moment you walk in, hooded eyes raking over your body in an agonizingly slow manner. Dahyun chooses then to do her party trick—disappearing without a word.

“Hi…” you respond, voice meek in this party setting. There’s more people than you anticipated, which is weird because it’s a Thursday and surely some of these people have morning classes. You can’t comment, though, because you’re here knowing damn well you have an eight am tomorrow.

The music is blasting, so loud you can feel the bass shaking the floor, sending jolts up from your toes to your head with every beat. There’s people in every crevice of this household, some even taking refuge on the staircase leading up to the bedrooms. Someone brushes by you, and you instinctively step closer to the wall to avoid being in the way. You should have known Jeongguk would follow.

He ducks down to shout into your ear. “Wasn’t sure if you were coming tonight,” he tells you, right as one of his friends rushes by, thrusting a cup into his hand that Jeongguk doesn’t even stop to question. He takes a sip, then offers you some.

“Dahyun didn’t wanna come alone,” you lie, tentatively sipping from his cup only to realize it’s worse than any alcohol here: it’s Sprite. Jeongguk seems amused by your subtle disgust, immediately taking the cup back. You send out a light prayer for his stomach and his skin. “Aren’t you supposed to be out pulling hoes or something?” You say, trying to go for teasing and playful but missing by a mile.

Jeongguk grins. “Why would I do that when the only girl I want is right here,” he motions, and then does that cliche move where he places a hand by the wall behind you. The worst thing is, even though Jeongguk seems intent on pulling every cheesy act known to mankind, your heart actually races.

“Shut up,” you laugh, “you just like that I don’t charge you the late fees on your books.”

At this, Jeongguk genuinely smiles, nose scrunching up as he gazes at you. “False,” he argues, and then leans forward, same stupid dopey smile on his face. “I love a woman who snorts milk out of her nose.”

“Jeon!” You shriek, smacking his arm as embarrassment washes over you. “You said you would forget about that!”

Jeongguk cackles, all boyish and rough like he does when he’s around Hoseok for too long. Somehow, knowing you’re the cause of that charming laughter has your annoyance fading away, a soft smile crawling onto your features.

“I hate you,” you say instead, looking up and meeting his gaze dead on for the first time that night.

Jeongguk smirks. “Do you now?” He throws back, then takes a step forward. Your shoulder touches the wall when you take a tentative step back. You give a half-assed shrug, entranced by the playfulness that lurks behind his eyes. He gives you an exaggerated pout. “That sucks, because I,” he steps closer again, and this time he’s looking down at you over the bridge of his nose, “really like you.”

“I…” you trail off, too hypnotized by the pink tongue that swipes across his lips as he gazes at you. There is no hesitation on his face.

When you don’t say anything for another moment, Jeongguk ducks down. His nose bumps against yours, his breath warm as it fans across your face. “Y’know, I’d treat you so right,” he suddenly says, and your panties immediately turn into Niagara Falls at the newfound deepness of his voice. You feel lightheaded from his close proximity and promising words. “Could make you feel so good, baby, if you just let me.”

You shiver, nearly jumping out of your skin when a hand snakes its way around your waist, tugging you forward gently. Not overbearingly, because you know the last thing Jeongguk would ever do was want to make you uncomfortable. He pulls you close enough that it ends up being you who steps completely into his embrace. Your trembling hands find their place on his shoulders, and Jeongguk has never looked more content.

“You... only want sex,” you softly accuse, and the only reason your quiet voice doesn’t get lost in the noise is because of how close the two of you are.

Jeongguk bites his lip at your words, and you wonder if part of him is surprised that you’d so openly say such a thing. “Not with you,” he says eventually. “Wanna hold you like this forever, ___. And if that leads to you cumming on my tongue every now and then, well,” he smiles, “all fine by me.”

“Jeon,” you scold, scared that someone might have heard him.

“What?” He grins, pressing impossibly closer. His lip gives the slightest pucker, and you find yourself unconsciously leaning closer, the hand around your waist tightening. “I want you, baby.”

You can’t hide the lovestruck expression on your face as you look between his mouth and his eyes, and you wonder if he’s being honest.

Right as you’re about to throw all your doubts out the window and kiss him, you’re bombarded with the sound of obnoxious air horns from a DJ who obviously knows shit about, well, DJ-ing.

You jump at the sudden sound, bumping your head against the wall behind you. Jeongguk’s eyes widen. “Oh shit, are you okay?” He fusses, all traces of that suave, heartthrob replaced with a fretful Jeon.

“I’m fine,” you say, though you’re not because you’re absolutely dying right now. From the fact you almost gave into Jeongguk but also the embarrassment of hitting your head. “I-I need to find Dahyun,” you announce, and give Jeongguk no time to process that before you’re bolting into the crowded house like you just broke something.

jeon tell me you got home safe jeon please

You pause in the middle of removing your makeup, one eyelash on to symbolize the mess you are right now. Dahyun is humming some tune as she does the same, the both of you clad in your pajamas and fuzzy socks. Carefully, you pick up your phone.

you im home! me and the girls ubered home lol you sorry i didnt get to say goodbye :(

jeon dont worry abt it babe jeon just happy to know ur ok

“You better be texting Jeongguk, since you failed to complete the one job you had tonight,” Dahyun calls and you curse. You whirl around to face her, and she snorts at your one eyelash.

“Be honest,” you say. “If you were the campus crush who could get coochie every time he breathed, would you leave all that for me?”

Dahyun freezes. “Well, not when you’re only wearing one eyelash.” You groan, flopping into your seat uncomfortably. “Babe,” Dahyun sighs, as if sensing the gravity of your dilemma. “You’re hot! Everyone knows this except you.”

“But am I?” You whine. “Am I attractive or do you just feel obligated to say that because you’re my friend, be honest.”

“Oh my god,” she huffs, climbing into her bed, phone in hand. She doesn’t even bother looking your way when she’s all settled in. “You have this weird idea that Jeongguk is some intangible idol, as if you haven’t seen the dude deepthroat an entire bratwurst at the diversity fair. If anything, you’re the dream girl on campus, you stupid bitch.”

“The only true thing I heard is me being a stupid bitch,” you mope, and Dahyun throws a pillow at your face. You take this attack as initiative to finally take off your other lash, finishing your cleansing and moisturizing (for the second time) routine.

“Listen,” she says, setting her phone down to stare you dead in the eye. Her voice is devoid of any emotion. “If it makes you feel better, he wrote JK + __ on our group handout last week.”

You don’t sleep that night.

The last person you’re expecting to see at this secluded cafe on a Saturday morning was Jeon Jeongguk, yet here he was in all his delicious morning glory. By morning glory, you mean the soft, sleepy eyes that stare at you from across the table, voice so deep and husky.

“Why are you here if you just woke up?” You interrogate, settling into the empty seat in front of him. Carefully, you begin pulling things out of your bag, trying your best to not look away too long. This sight was rare, Jeongguk usually being at an energy level of about eighty seven at all times. To see him so tired and sluggish was unheard of.

He gestures over to where Taehyung is in the middle of what looks like a job interview. “Moral support,” Jeongguk informs you. You nod in understanding, before returning your gaze to the sleepy angel in front of you.

He’s ridiculously tired, eyes dropping shut every time you so much as pause for a second. He seems apologetic too, murmuring I’m sorry I’m sorry whenever his eyes flutter shut. Your heart was going haywire at the sight. “Jeon,” you say softly, and get one, soft hum in response. “I think you should go home, Taehyung seems fine.”

He shakes his head. “Needs me,” he murmurs, trying desperately to snap his eyes back open to no avail. Eventually, you make the call, packing your things up way earlier than usual. You haul Jeongguk out of his seat, him sleepily trailing after you as you drag him out of the shop. He sleeps on the short bus ride back to campus, and even almost sleeps on the elevator up to his dorm.

“In we go,” you announce, unlocking his door before nudging him inside. His roommate is nowhere to be found, oddly enough given the early hour. Jeongguk stumbles inside, plopping down on his bed right away. “Sleep.”

He lets out a high pitched whine the moment you turn to leave. “Come cuddle,” he huffs, face pressed against his pillow. His hair’s haloed around him, pout smushed against the cushion as he stares at you.

“You need to sleep,” you point out.

He rolls onto his back, patting the mattress beside him. “Wanna feel you,” he says. Your cheeks flush red. As if realizing the meaning behind his words, sleepy little Jeongguk takes the initiative to push you further. “Pressed against my body,” he drawls, his deep chuckle resonating throughout your body. “C’mon, baby, too scared to be in bed with me?”

You scoff, though your cheeks are warm. “You wouldn’t do anything anyway, you’re half asleep.”

Jeongguk shrugs, lips quirking to the side as he motions to his side again. “So? Can tell you like it slow anyway,” he grunts, before sitting up and shuffling to the edge of the bed and assuming a sitting position. Without warning, he catches your wrist in his hand and tugs you between his spread thighs.

He’s more awake than he’s been all morning, and part of you is happy but the other is anxious. God, was this boy dangerous.

“You’re half asleep, Jeon,” you say, trying to diffuse the sudden sexual tension. Jeongguk smiles up at you.

“Cmon, baby,” he exhales, and one fluid tug has you plopping onto his thigh. You startle at the sudden change, grabbing onto his shoulders for support. All he does is laugh some more, nuzzling his face against your neck as your heart goes into panic mode. “Bet I could get in so deep,” he murmurs, breath tickling your neck and you feel your legs turn to jelly.

“G-Gguk,” you try to warn, but it ends up sounding more like a plea. For what, you’re not entirely sure.

A sudden kiss to the junction of your neck and shoulder has your spirit ascending into another plane. Jeongguk smiles at your pliant body. “Look at you,” he continues, kissing down your neck until your body is physically quivering. “So sensitive. No one ever touched you like this before, doll?”

You shake your head no, and nearly jump out of your own skin when a hand clasps onto the inside of your thigh. “Jeon, we shouldn’t…” you choke out, even though your traitorous hand clamps down on his and pushes it closer to where you need him most.

“We shouldn’t?” He teases, and then cups your sex.

You transcend.

Jeongguk laughs, airy chuckles fanning across your jaw. “Then stop,” he tells you, the both of you watching as your hips unconsciously grind into his palm. Even when you tell yourself you need to stop, your body feels heavenly being touched by him, so you physically can’t.

“I can’t,” you reiterate, and muffle a moan against the side of his face when he presses a finger down on where he knows your clit is hiding. The thin leggings you’d worn did nothing to spare you.

“God, you’re so fucking sexy,” he sighs, watching you work yourself on his hand. He traces his index finger over the seam of your leggings, where your folds meet and you moan again. “You gonna let me finish you off, princess? Gonna let me finger your tight little pussy until you cry? But I bet you’d make the prettiest noises if I licked you down there. Or are you gonna cum in your panties like this?”

All the different ideas he stuffs into your brain are overwhelming, especially when the only thing you really want is to be stuffed with his fingers and cock. “J-Just do it,” you beg.

“Do what?” He plays, watching the way your face contorted with every brush against your mound.

“Whatever you want,” you cry, biting down on your fist to stop any more noises from spilling out.

Jeongguk smiles, pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth. Such a simple gesture, but it has your stomach somersaulting. God, you needed this. You were practically sobbing for his dick, which was embarrassing in itself, but actually getting dicked down sort of cancelled it out. PEMDAS or whatever. 

Just as his hand creeps to the hem of your leggings, there’s a rattle of the doorknob, and you jump. The cloud of lust that had engulfed you two fades away and you’re suddenly aware of the jingling of a key outside.

“What the fuck,” Jeongguk whisper-shouts, looking absolutely scandalized that his roommate is coming home at this moment of all moments.

“Should I hide?” You whisper back, never having been in such a situation before. Jeongguk looks at you like you’re stupid.

“Just,” he sighs, standing up. He ruffles his hair anxiously. “Just… act natural.”

You sit perfectly still. “Not like a Sim!!”

“Captain Underpants and the Invasion of the Incredibly Naughty Cafeteria Ladies from Outer Space (and the Subsequent Assault of the Equally Evil Lunchroom Zombie Nerds),” you read, gasping for breath by the end of it. Jeongguk beams at you. “You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Nope,” Jeongguk says, leaning over the counter and watching as you scan his book under his name. “I’ll let you know how it is.”

You roll your eyes, writing down the return date on a piece of paper you stuff inside. “Please do, I’m absolutely dying to read this book.”

You hand the book over to Jeongguk, and try to ignore the way he stares at you for a second too long. Namjoon chooses this exact moment to take his lunch break, sauntering off whistling the the Angry Birds tune.

Right before Jeongguk can jump into an interrogation, the door swings open and Jisoo from your sociology elective saunters in, carrying the same mountain of books you had checked out for her two weeks ago.

“___, hi!” She exclaims right away. She, too, was infected with the same bimbo disease as Jeongguk, the one where they both had no concept of being quiet in a library.

“Hi,” you greet back, immediately standing to take the books from her. “Did you actually read through all of these?” You ask, trying to make polite small talk. You’re not particularly close to her, but it’d be rude to act like you didn’t know her.

She laughs at your comment. “Oh god, no. I just open random pages and reference them for essays,” she admits.

You try to make more small talk with her as you scan through her books, but the girl literally almost hit the material limit, which is fifty books, so you soon become consumed in scanning the barcode, briefly flipping through the book for any damage, and then repeating it all over. You’re not surprised when she drifts away, and you’re mentally cursing Namjoon for going on break now of all times.

It’s about ten minutes later when you’re all done, the computer’s library system going haywire on you, the same way it had when she first checked out all these books. You look away from the screen, standing to face Jisoo, only to find she’s drifted to the other end of the welcome desk, where a certain someone had gone to while you served her.

Oh.

You’re not anticipating the wave of jealousy that hits you watching gorgeous, smart Jisoo talk to Jeongguk. She matches him perfectly, both so beautiful it hurts. It’s when she says something to him that you snap out of it. “When can I come over again?” Soft enough that you wouldn’t have heard if you hadn’t been paying attention.

Jeongguk’s toying with a bookmark stand, but you still see the quirk of his lips on his face when she says that.

All you can do is watch from the sidelines, so close yet somehow miles away as he says something back to her that gets drowned out by the thundering of your heart. You suppose it’s only natural for a guy like Jeongguk to flirt with girls, and he’d never said he only, exclusively wanted you. Really, you shouldn’t be as surprised.

But you are.

You’re surprised and, dare you say it, discouraged by the scene. He’d been so eager to finally win you over the other night, so much so that he made you feel special with every word he uttered and every look he gave you. You’d almost believed in his sincerity, but seeing him so easily converse with Jisoo about whatever past they have, served as a cold reminder that you and Jeongguk believe in two completely different relationship styles.

So you sit back down, gnawing on your lip as you try to do other duties, clicking around uselessly on your computer until eventually, Jisoo wanders back.

“Am I all set?” She smiles, and you can’t even find it in you to dislike her. You plaster on your best customer service smile, nodding and handing her back her library card. She thanks you three times over for the hassle, before waving goodbye to you and Jeongguk.

When the door falls shut behind her, you immediately drop the facade, though Jeongguk doesn’t seem to notice. “Whew. She left a lot of work for you,” he laughs, eyeing the big stack beside you. You don’t even bother responding, as, at that moment, Namjoon returns from his lunch break.

(How convenient! You swear this fucker had a sixth sense for knowing when work was about to become hard.)

“Joon, I’m taking my break now,” you announce, and Namjoon stares at you like a deer in headlights, the last bite of a sandwich raised to his mouth.

“Uh,” he says, 140 IQ and all. He glances behind you at Jeongguk, who also is confused as all hell. “Okay, then.”

“___?” Jeongguk questions. You stalk off, pushing the gate away from the desk before bursting into the employee break room right across from it.

You cry the moment you get home, and Dahyun jumps ten feet out of her bed in shock. Her girlfriend, Momo, is sitting on the floor painting her toes. “Oh no,” she cries, sweet and understanding in all the ways Dahyun wasn’t. “My poor baby, what’s wrong?” She asks, waddling over in the my-nail-polish-hasn’t-dried-yet way to hug you.

“He was flirting with another girl,” you sob, dropping your bag by the door as Momo continues fawning over you, wiping your face with tissues. Dahyun gets out of bed, cracks her fingers, and promptly announces:

“I’m gonna kill him.”

Initially, you would have let her. But after a while you manage to calm down, loud Kim Kardashian sobs fading into tiny hiccups as the two of them coddle you. You tell them all about what terrible, good for nothing Jeongguk did, and in true female solidarity, they vow to kick his ass for you. Eventually, you settle on not whooping his ass, just cutting any romantic notions with him off to avoid further heartbreak. After all, you were kinda friends before you had your little crush revelation.

It’s later in the night when you announce you maybe got 2% over him, which the girls count as an absolute win, but then Jeongguk texts you and they groan at the way you jump for your phone.

jeon hey can we talk ? jeon did I do something wrong today? jeon felt like u were mad at me lol, and then u took a really long break and I had to leave for class so I didn’t even get to see u again jeon just wanna know if everything is ok

You read through the messages a couple times, and wonder if he’s being serious and didn’t see anything sus with his actions, or if he’s just toying with your emotions. Momo tugs Dahyun away to give you some sort of privacy, and then you’re left alone in your thoughts.

you everything’s fine ! you I just wasn’t feeling well lol

He responds right away.

jeon please don’t lie to me ___ jeon I know what you’re probably thinking and I just want to say it’s not like that

For some reason, him saying he knows you enough to know your thoughts irritates you. He obviously didn’t know shit about you if he was out here making you look like a clown. Your fingers type before you can even think.

you lmao you thats funny

jeon ?

you you most def do not know what I’m thinking so please just take my word when I say I felt sick

jeon lmao. what do you mean...

you you barely know ME besides the fact I work @ the library and dorm w Dahyun. don't say u know what I’m thinking, bc that would imply you know me on a closer level which you don’t

jeon ok seriously what's up with you?  jeon im trying to make sure ur okay but ur just being difficult as fuck

you I’m not being difficult I’m just being real

jeon ur not tho, ur being defensive for no reason at all

you so? we’re barely friends and we barely know each other, how I feel is none of ur business

jeon lmfaoooo, so now we’re barely friends?

you thats what I said didnt I

You set your phone aside when you don’t immediately see the texting dots appear, assuming your dry response is probably enough to ward Jeongguk off. Your face feels warm, and you’re not sure if it’s from frustration or anger, but you guess it’s both. You’re not sure what set you off, the fact Jeongguk wants to act like he knows you, as if he wasn’t just chasing after you for some pussy, or the fact he wanted to act like some all-knowing being when it came to your feelings.

Eitherway, you’re extremely heated, grinding your teeth together when five minutes pass and he hasn’t texted you back. As if sensing the tension, Momo and Dahyun abruptly announce that they’re going to the ice cream place down the street, offering to bring something back to which you decline.

They leave, the heavy door slamming shut behind them. You get exactly two seconds of peace and quiet before your phone starts going off like crazy, all from Jeongguk.

jeon you’re starting to piss me off jeon drop the attitude baby. jeon bc I can be just as mean as u jeon and I won’t hesitate to make you cry

You blink. Every ounce of your body that had been consumed with an unknown anger slowly fades away as you stare wide eyed at Jeongguk’s messages. This was nothing like the Jeongguk you knew; he was soft and playful. He never raised his voice at you, and he’d never been anything less than a sweetheart.

you I don’t have an attitude

Is your feeble reply, too scared to reply to any other part of his message because you truly had no experience with this Jeongguk.

jeon so then put your big girl pants on and tell me what’s wrong jeon enough w this other shit

You sigh, snuggling into your covers as you absentmindedly tap the back of your phone.

you nothing is wrong

He doesn’t reply for a couple minutes again, but Dahyun sends you a text letting you know her and Momo decided to go to an event on the other side of campus, and telling you not to wait up. You reply back a simple ok right as Jeongguk responds.

jeon ok. so let me tell you what’s wrong then jeon you’re mad bc I was speaking to Jisoo today and she asked abt coming over jeon she comes over all the time jeon bc she is my roommates girlfriend

Your mind goes blank.

How embarrassing to have your mind read word for word, even more so when apparently, your worries weren’t even plausible. God. Instantly you feel stupid, replaying today’s entire scene and trying desperately to find something to catch Jeongguk in a lie. But other than asking that one question, there had been no other interesting talk between the two.

Your phone pings again, and you scramble to type a response, only to freeze at the words on the screen

jeon what blows me is that i don’t even owe u shit especially not an explanation jeon u don’t give 2 flying fucks about me. U just like the attention I give u and watching me make a fool of myself for u jeon I bend over backwards chasing after you, trying to get you to notice me, but you’ve done nothing to show me u feel the same jeon but you’re the one allowed to get mad when I speak to other girls? like u said “ that’s funny ”

Oh, no. Immediately your heart comes crashing down, and your fingers tremble as you watch Jeongguk slip away right before your eyes.

you Jeongguk you it’s not like that please you I like you so much, it’s just hard for me to

jeon to what? Get over your stupid stereotype of me?? jeon lmfao. Yeah that must be sooo hard jeon it’s whatever tho bc I had one of u too jeon my dream girl

This is not what you expected when he said he’d make you cry.

“Honey, you just have to talk to him,” Momo says the next morning, pressing a cucumber slice onto your eyes. You flinch at the initial iciness, but then relax when she brushes your hair out of your face. You’d gone to sleep a wreck, crying and sobbing as you thought desperately on how to win Jeongguk back, but everything he had said was true.

You’d done nothing but reject him since the beginning, had only just begun treating him as a friend, yet you instantly placed the blame on him at the first signs of trouble. God, he was right. You’d been selfish this entire time, and now he wasn’t responding to your messages anymore.

Dahyun nods from her cocoon at the foot of your bed. “I’m sure it’ll be easier in person, text convos are always weird,” she tries to comfort you. “But keep those slices on, those bags under your eyes are no joke.”

Momo smacks her calf. “Be nice! She’s going through a crisis.”

Right as you’re about to pay for your meal and sprint back to hide in your dorm, you spot a coconut head of hair facing the windows in the far corner of the dining hall. Fuck. Faintly, you can hear Dahyun’s voice shouting for you to stop being a pussy and go talk to him. You pause by the exit, one leg in one leg out, before saying fuck it. If worse comes to worse, you transfer schools and live with heartbreak and three cats for the rest of your life.

“I-Is someone sitting here?” You say before you can chicken out, and mentally curse yourself for stuttering. Oh, the social horror.

Jeongguk visibly jumps at your voice, wide doe eyes staring at you as if he expected to never see you again. After all, it’s been a week since your little fight, three days since you last tried texting him. He shakes his head, turning his attention back to his plate, but not before tugging the hoodie of his sweater over his head in a classic self defensive tactic.

You slide into the seat, staring at the plate of food like you’ve never seen it in your life, never mind the fact you picked it out less than fifteen minutes ago. You accidentally scrape your fork against the bottom, and the both of you cringe.

Jeongguk clears his throat, hands clasped together between his thighs as he stares out the window. “Don’t you have work?” He asks, voice raspy.

You shake your head. “I took the week off,” you confess, hoping he doesn’t press for more, because then you’d have to tell him your reasoning was due to heartache.

“Oh. That’s nice,” he says, and then you fall into a pit of awkward silence.

You push the food around on your plate, hoping he’ll say something, anything to save the two of you. In the end, he stays silent, sleepily glancing out the windows.

When you look closer, though, Jeongguk doesn’t look much hot than you. He’s got the same bags as you under his eyes, and his hair looks messier than his usual messy style. The fact he’s wearing his blue crocs out in public only confirms your theory.

After a solid five minutes of silence, even your hungry stomach managing to stay quiet, you decide enough is enough.

You shift ever so slightly, until you’re somewhat facing him and clear your throat; Jeongguk barely spares you a glance. “The Preposterous Plight of the Purple Potty People,” you blurt. Jeongguk blinks, face slowly morphing into one of confusion. Your cheeks feel hot under his gaze, having missed his brown eyes in the past week. “It’s your favorite one,” you announce. “Of the Captain Underpants books.”

After a moment, Jeongguk snorts, turning his attention away from you. “You’re not gonna win me over with that,” he says curtly, and your heart tightens at his emotionless tone of voice.

But you’ve done your research, and you’re not letting it go to waste. “You like George more than Harold because you think he contributes more. You love the characterization of Mr. Krupp the most, but you hate his theme song. You think the cover art could use some work, but you enjoy the overall art style. You hated the movie adaptation because Kevin Hart was in it,” you list, recalling every bit of information you’ve ever heard Jeongguk share about the stupid novels.

There’s a small quirk in the corner of Jeongguk’s lips, but it’s not the one you’re aiming for, so you switch tactics. “You hate the smell of bananas because you don’t think it should have a smell. You can’t put your left sock on first, because it’s bad luck to you. Your mom still washes your sheets for you. You know the lyrics to the original Dragon Ball series in three languages. You like wearing rings because it makes you feel like a pimp. You hate when Hoseok calls you the baby, because, according to you, you bench press his weight times two.”

“And a half,” he softly corrects, gazing at his hands, cheeks slightly tinged with red. You bite your lip, tentatively reaching a hand out to place on his arm. He looks at you right away, doe eyes so vulnerable and scared, like nothing you’ve ever seen before.

“I said we barely knew each other, but that was a lie,” you chuckle humorlessly, suddenly feeling your eyes tear up just remembering the conversation. “I know so much about you because I love listening to you talk. I love hearing your voice, and watching you wrestle with your friends, and fight with Dahyun. But I never tell you,” you bite your lip, blinking your eyes to backtrack the tears.

“And you’re right, I made you do all the work and I’m sorry, but I’m just so scared, Jeongguk,” you admit, voice cracking on his name. Your press a hand over your mouth, trying to collect yourself. Suddenly, a soft hand gently pats your thigh, and you find yourself reaching down to tangle your fingers together. “You can have anyone, Jeongguk, and you obviously know this,” you sigh. “I’m scared that I won’t be enough for you.”

“Hey, it’s alright,” Jeongguk says, voice soft in the way you’ve missed so much. His hand, shaky and unsure, reaches up to brush a tear from the corner of your eye. “Look at me,” he commands, and you do. “I think we’re both stupid, because I feel like I’ve never been enough for you,” he confesses with a chuckle you try to replicate through sniffles.

Suddenly, he’s close, forehead pressed to yours. “And maybe it’s true,” he says. “You won’t be enough for me, and I’ve never been enough for you.” Your heart aches at his words. “But that’s okay,” he assures, squeezing your thigh between his fingers. “We don't have to be right now, but we can try.”

You nod, clamping down a sob. “God, I hate how optimistic you are,” you laugh, and he smiles, cupping your face in his hands.

“And I hate watching you cry,” he says, fingers wiping your cheeks. Before you can say what you’re thinking, he’s snatching the words right out of you, “yes, I know I said what I said, and I felt like such a dick typing it, I made Jimin flick my forehead right after.”

You giggle, and he beams that dreamy smile at you again. “I’m gonna kiss you now,” he announces, and your heart thunders in your chest faster than the wings of a hummingbird.

And he does.

“I don’t know, I think Kevin Hart sounds great in this,” you mention, and you feel the hard scoff Jeongguk lets out from your position cradled on his chest. “It’s not the worst thing in the world,” you defend.

“You’re sick,” he says, then pauses the Captain Underpants movie to engage in your third debate of the evening. You’re barely fifteen minutes in. “You think that weirdo did George justice? How? In what world?”

“Babe, it’s just a voice actor,” you placate. “No one died because Mr. Hart voiced him.”

Jeongguk splutters. “Mr. Hart—you don’t know this man! And something did die! My hopes for a sequel!”

You shush him, pressing your index finger to his lips. “Enough complaints, Rotten Tomatoes. We won’t even finish at this rate.”

Jeongguk hits play, grumbling under his breath.

Just as you’d predicted, you don’t even make it to the halfway mark before Jeongguk’s got you on your back, plush lips working yours until they’re bruised, tongue halfway down your throat. “The mov—“ you mumble.

“Fuck Mr. Hart,” Jeongguk says, kissing down your jaw like he can’t allow himself to miss a single spot. When he reaches the collar of your shirt, he wastes no time tugging it off of you. You whine, instinctively covering your chest. “Don’t be shy,” he chuckles, “here, look-,” he tugs his sweatshirt over his head, and you’re met with the strong muscles of his abdomen and pecs, “-twins.”

You roll your eyes. “Just kiss me, Mr. Jeon,” you tease, wrapping your hands around him to bring him closer. He chokes, and mumbles something about saving that for another time.

Before you know it, he’s kissing between your thighs, soft lips producing the most erotic sounds with every smooch he gives. “Can I take these off?” he asks, one lone finger creeping beneath the hem of your panties, right where your hip is. You nod, biting your lower lip hard the moment he begins sliding them down. His hands are soft as they glide over your legs, and when he finally tugs them away from your ankles, he wastes no time nudging your legs open for him.

“Don’t just look at it,” you whine, jabbing his ribs with your foot. Jeongguk grins.

“Sorry I stare, you’re just so pretty,” he smiles, and you muffle an annoyed groan into your palms. “Gonna eat you out now,” he announces, finally, and you uncover your face to watch the way he lowers his mouth onto your throbbing pussy, pink tongue coming out to lick at your clit.

The first press of the wet muscle has your toes curling, back arched. You’d been craving this for the longest, and just as you’d expect, it’s better than any fantasy. “Right there,” you moan, reaching down to tangle a hand in Jeongguk’s wavy hair, the other fisting the pillow beneath your head.

Jeongguk absorbs all your tiny reactions, toying with your clit just how you like it. He rolls his tongue around it, making sure every part has been in his mouth at least once. When he suctions his lips around it and moans like this was getting him off, your body melts. “Fuck,” you cry out, your thighs quivering around his head. Part of you wants to slam them shut, hide from his tongue and all its devious ministrations. But the other part has never felt so good in your entire life.

When Jeongguk decides he’s pampered your swollen clit enough, he gives it one final kiss, wet and slippery. “Good?” He smiles up at you, lips slick with your juices. You nod, probably already looking fucked out. He smirks at your response, and your heart backflips in your chest, when he reaches up to knot your fingers together.

He kisses your knuckle and you whine. “How many fingers do you want?” He asks, and you blurt out the first number you can think of.

“Eight,” you choke, and immediately flush in embarrassment afterwards.

Jeongguk laughs, dropping his head to your thigh in a fit of giggles. He looks absolutely ethereal there, soft brown hair sprawled across your skin like an angel. “Smaller numbers, baby, please,” he chuckles. You shrug, so he decides for you. “How about I just use my tongue instead?” You think you might love him.

He settles back down, lips pressing against your mound one final time, before he’s diving in. You mewl right away, body becoming one with the mattress beneath you at the first brush of his tongue.

“Oh, Jeongguk,” you gasp, hands burying themselves in his scalp again. He hums in response, and the sound has every nerve in your body lighting up. His tongue prods against your folds, slowly licking his way deeper and deeper into your cunt.

The worst comes when he sighs against your pussy, literally sighs, like he’s so blessed to be there. “You’re s-so good at this,” you cry out, trembling fingers twisting his hair so tightly that you manage to pull him off just an inch. He pinches your thigh in warning, before stuffing his tongue into you again, absolutely plunging into the depths of your hole.

Just when you think he couldn’t possibly outdo this, he jolts up suddenly, nose brushing against your clit. His eyes go wide for the slightest second, as if he really hadn’t planned that, before flickering at you.

To your utter embarrassment, he takes one long whiff, eyes rolling to the back of his head in pleasure.

He pulls away from your dripping hole. “You smell so fucking good,” he informs you, spreading a fiery blush across your cheeks.

“Thanks?” You say, and he grins, shuffling onto his knees all of a sudden. You mope the loss of his tongue on your pussy, but forget about it the second he reaches for his desk and returns with a condom.

He tears the foil packet open with gentle hands, eyes weirdly zeroed in on that only. You nudge his hip, and when he meets your gaze, he instantly averts it. Like he’s suddenly shy.

Oh he was gonna be the death of you.

You tug his boxers down and get to revel in more of those bashful glances, but you soon forget about that when he grips his rock hard member in one hand, jacking it to its full potential. “Ready?” He says, one hand gripping your hip, the other his cock. You nod, and then shift up onto your elbows to watch him sink into you.

You can barely keep your eyes open, the second the tip of his cock brushes against you your eyes roll back into your head. You moan, letting yourself flop back against the mattress, chest heaving with each inch he sinks in. “Fuck, you’re big,” you cry, biting down on your fist.

Jeongguk chuckles. “Yeah?” He grunts, and then stills as he waits for you to catch your breath. He gives you exactly four seconds before he’s thrusting the remainder of the way in.

Your back arches off the bed, a high-pitched moan ripping itself out of your throat. “Jeon!”

“Relax, relax,” he croons, releasing your hip to lean over you, peppering your face in kisses. You’re heaving for air, so overwhelmed with emotions. “You’re doing so good for me, doll,” he comforts, kissing every inch of you until you regain your wits. “So wet and warm for me, you have no idea how bad I wanna just ram my cock into your tight, little pussy.”

You huff, heart still skipping by the time you grow familiar with the sheer size of his dick inside of you. When you’ve finally come back down to earth, eyes fluttering at Jeongguk, he gives you one affirmative nod before he begins really fucking you.

He starts carefully, like he’s afraid he’ll break you with one push. You’re thankful that he’s at least somewhat aware of his own bear strength, but you’d prefer if he picked up the pace. Before you can file a complaint, he’s hiking your thigh up onto the crease of his elbow, and ramming himself into you.

“Could already hear some smart ass comment coming,” he groans, snapping his hips into you with a newfound intensity. You moan, trying desperately to reciprocate some movements back.

“Wasn’t gonna say anything,” you gasp, fingernails digging into the skin of his shoulders, scratching lone lines down his back. Jeongguk snorts, pushing in, and then grinding your pelvises together deliciously.

He rolls his eyes, then chooses that exact moment to capture your lips in his. You groan softly, body boneless beneath him at the gentle way he kisses you, like his entire life depends on this single kiss.

When he finally releases your lips, he’s huffing against your mouth, hips having not stopped a single time. You know he’s tired and so riled up; you’d felt the brush of his half-hard member from the moment you first laid down to watch the movie.

But Jeongguk was a gentleman, through and through. You’d felt the brush of his cock, and heard the thundering of his heart, but he hadn’t pushed you further a single time. He basked in your presence, waiting until you crept your hand beneath his shirt to finally pounce.

“I’m close,” you tell him, reaching down to toy with your clit. Jeongguk had treated it like the finest treasure earlier, but now your gentle caresses feel mediocre compared to the way he’d touched it. Jeongguk nods, the tips of his wavy hair sticking to his forehead and the back of his neck. You abandon your quest to finish yourself off and focus on brushing his hair away from his face. “You’re so good to me,” you moan, lightly picking the corner of his mouth. “Don’t deserve you.”

He rams his cock into you, the arm not holding up your thigh weakening, until he’s leaning on his forearm over you. “Don’t say that,” he chokes out, and you wonder if his orgasm is as close as yours.

A particular brush of his cock against your cervix has you seeing stars, thighs clenching around him. “Just a little bit—more,” you beg, body writhing beneath him, pushing yourself up to meet his thrusts.

“So perfect,” he praises, kissing along your jaw. “Come for me, baby.”

You nod, but not before cupping his face in your hands, and pressing a sweet kiss to his lips. He makes a soft little sound of surprise, smile pressed against your mouth, and the heat in your abdomen finally explodes. You disassociate for all of one second, consumed in a wave of bliss never before heard of, his pistoning thrusts working you through it.

You nearly cry from how good it feels, throwing an arm around his neck to pull him closer. You’re babbling like an idiot, saying shit you won’t remember later. What you do recall is the chuckles Jeongguk had muffled against your neck, hips never faltering as he chased his own high.

He finds it a few beats later, the muscles of his back suddenly going rigid. He moans your name, somehow making it sound like it’s the best song in the world, before his hips begin stuttering in their mission. He eventually goes slack, slumped over you without completely crushing you beneath the weight of his muscles.

By the time you’ve fully recovered, he’s sliding out of you. Right as you go to speak, he stuffs two fingers into your sensitive cunt. “Jeon!” You wail, reaching down to push him away before you come again.

He snickers. “What? It’d be a waste to let it out,” he says, letting go when he’s decided he’s done his job, popping the digits into his mouth. You groan, trying to quell the excitement that builds in your chest from watching him suck your cum off his fingers.

“You’re the worst,” you sigh, snatching his t-shirt off the edge of the bed to tug over your bare form. Jeongguk tugs his underwear back on, retrieving yours from where he’d flung them across the room. When you’re settled into the blankets again, you’re not expecting the laptop to return as well. You raise a questioning eyebrow.

Jeongguk shrugs, nestling into your chest. “Hit play, this is when Professor Poopy Pants begins attacking the city.”

Hello! For the meta asks, would you do 1, 5, 8, and 17?

you did not come to play, lilac! thanks for all these questions! <3

1. Tell us about your current project(s)  –   what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

oh lord. that’s a... question. i have. so many current projects, i don’t even know where to start. this is gonna be long so please bear with me lol i’ll probably give more detail for some fics over others, and i’ll only go over fics I’ve got documents for because otherwise we’d be here forever.

The Art of Love: so this one is obvious because it’s been in progress for the last 2ish years? no i think it’s three now. I won’t go into detail with this because the fic is roughly halfway through, so there’s plenty of content for that up! I’d say the progress with that fic is actually going really well, though. Unlike Alliance, which took 8 years--five years of writing, three of editing--TAoL has been up for way less time, and is already about to hit the halfway mark! I really need to get back to it, tbh because it’s been way too long since my last update.

Honor Bound (sequel to Alliance): so this is.... kind of on pause. I’ve got the first three chapters written, but my focus has been more on TAoL when it comes to my more complicated, long running stories, so HB has taken a backseat. I think I won’t get back to working on the Allied Nations Saga until after TAoL is done, in all honesty.

Find Me: this is my HS AU, which has been on the back burner forever and I feel terrible because I think it may honestly be my most popular fic. Unfortunately, AUs/slice of life stuff is difficult for me because I’m more interested in politics, so I lost momentum on this fic. It is about halfway done. I have a good chunk of chapter six written, but not enough that I could say I’m close to finishing it.

It Eats Your Heart: obviously I just started this one, and it’s a horror fic. I’ve really gotta sit down and do some major plotting on it because I only have some very vague ideas currently.

Pearl-Filled Lungs: this is one of like three ningyo AUs I have--the other are pirate/ningyo AUs (and ones actually a selkie not a ningyo). I started it last year for the GaaLee fest, and it’s been sitting unfinished for far too long. I finally sat down recently and plotted the whole thing out, so I’m hoping to get back to working on it soon! It’s only 5 chapters in total, so I don’t think it’ll take me super long to get through once I sit down and do it.

Who Dares to Love Forever: This is a working title, and I may change it. This is a fic idea I’ve had for a couple years, inspired by the song Who Wants to Live Forever by Queen. This particular fic is a vehicle for my sage mode!rock lee headcanon, and explores just how effective Chiyo giving Gaara her life would have been given she was an old biddy. So the idea for this fic is that Gaara’s running out of time because Chiyo only had so much to offer.

Absolution: this is another fic that I’ve had on the back burner for years. it was initially inspired by art by @brianadoesotherjunk but quickly spiraled into something much bigger because of course it did. This particular fic is one I’m extremely excited about. I need to go back over the first part, because I feel like it’s not quite right, but I do technically have the first part done. This fic follows Gaara struggling with bouts of narcolepsy that trigger nightmares induced by trauma and guilt from his childhood. These nightmares are incredibly dangerous for obvious reasons, but even more so because Temari’s baby is on the way. Temari and Shikamaru are married, living in the Kazekage estate, and with their baby coming and both needing/wanting to get back to work, they also need a nanny. Unbeknownst to Gaara, the year prior to the events of the fic, Maito Gai died, succumbing to the 8th Gate finally, and Lee has since been spiraling. His depression has become so self-destructive that he’s been taken off active duty. Shikamaru, along with the rest of the Konoha 12 (minus Neji and Sasuke), get together and discuss what to do. Tenten believes that Lee being a nanny would be the perfect thing. And so Rock Lee is sent to Suna, hired by Shikamaru and Temari as their live-in nanny...

We Need Not Be Yellow Tulips in a Garden of Gardenia’s, Yet We Go the Way of the Red Camellia: true to form, I decided that a hanahaki fic was something I had to do, and I was not going to pass up the chance at being as Extra As Possible with the flowery language, ergo the ridiculous title. I’ve gotten part way through the first chapter of this fic, but the whole thing is roughly plotted out and each chapter title is just as extra as the whole fic’s title.

Thirteen Strokes: so this is a fic I have--once again--had on my mind for ages, and--once again, because I am nothing if not a caricature of myself--inspired by a Florence+the Machine song, All This and Heaven Too. I started writing this the other night, as I wanna use it for GaaLee bingo. It’ll be 13 chapters, as per the 13 strokes that it takes to make the character for love, ai, in Japanese. The fic is from Gaara’s PoV, and follows his journey with and his relationship to love, with lots of worldbuilding and politics because it wouldn’t be an Eeri Original without those things.

Scarification: this is another idea for bingo based around the prompt shinshoubyou, which is a fictional disease where your emotions cause physical marks on you

Fill in the [  ]: another bingo idea, based around the prompt bouaishoukoigun, the fictional disease where you forget the person you love if it’s unrequited.

The Eagle’s Augury: an idea that allows me to play around with more worldbuilding and focus on Karura. In this fic, the curse (mentioned briefly on the Naruto wikia) that has led to every single Kazekage being assassinated, is coming for Gaara, and Karura is trying to warn him from beyond the grave. At the same time, Temari and Shikamaru’s marriage is approaching, and their ceremony is being held in Suna, with all the fan fair a marriage for someone from the Kazekage line should see. Again, another fic inspired by Miss Florence+the Machine, the song is Mother

Pomegranate Sun: this is a fic that I am... so excited about. Another fic that was originally inspired by a Queen song, Under Pressure, and has of course taken on a life of its own. This fic, I am actually going to be writing with @ghoste-catte! It’s an arranged marriage trope, and I’m super pumped for it! We’ve only got a little bit started, and it has obviously not taken priority for either of us since we both have a lot of fics on our plates.

The Ballad of the Dragon and the Phoenix: this is a fic I’m really excited but is going to take a LOT of research to get off the ground. I had this idea sometime last year, I wanna say? This fic is another self-indulgent headcanon about Lee’s origins, his family, etc. This fic starts when Gaara shows up on Lee’s doorstep, asking him to accompany him to another country for reasons Lee cannot understand. Gaara has been in talks with Phoenix Kingdom, hoping to forge a new relationship only to find that the Emperor wants to use shinobi for militaristic purposes. Lee doesn’t understand what help he could possibly offer the Kazekage, but he can’t very well turn him down.

okay, i’m gonna stop there. these are the ones I have titles and documents for, and honestly that’s probably way more than you wanted to know about lol

5. What character that you’re writing do you most identify with? 

Despite the fact that most of my fics end up from Gaara’s PoV, I actually identify with Lee the most!

8. Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read?

Yes! Which is hard to find, tbh, because I am a sucker for political dramas with slow burn romances, but I don’t see a lot of that in the GaaLee fandom. I’m not as into like slice of life or short stories where the characters get together quick, I’m really not into established relationship fics unless it’s a sequel, so I tend to avoid those. I like AUs but it really depends on the AU, because I ultimately prefer the canon and I love seeing the way people write the shinobi world and all its rules and cultures and things. I’m just a big fan of worldbuilding, politics, and slow slow burns. Not this 25k SLOW BURN! crap because that is NOT a slow burn. I wanna see a fic that’s 200k words in and they still haven’t even figured out they’re in love! I like stories I can really sink my teeth into, ya know?

17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?

Oh gosh. I generally don’t think too much about it except like hoping people don’t think I’m like a stuck up asshole because of how I talk about my writing, writing in general, my hcs, etc. I mean, obviously I don’t expect everyone in this fandom to like me--and there are ppl I’ve gone out of my way to be vocally against because they do nasty shit--but largely I feel like I come across as too intense, so even the general population of GaaLee fans that I do want to interact with I’m always a lil nervous that people secretly don’t like me and basically are like “oh god this bitch again” when they see me in the tags. But I just get really excited and invested in my ideas, and honestly for the longest time this fandom was SO small and there weren’t a lot of people putting out content regularly so it was like a handful of us so I think it made me more emphatic about GaaLee lol I think I always like assume people aren’t as excited about my writing as I am or that people are like “too much politic, i need more romance”.

I’m always surprised when people really love my AUs, like Kado or Find Me have had such fantastic reception, and it’s like people just eat that shit up so much. And then I look at like Alliance or Art of Love and get kind of confused because I think by comparison those are more interesting and more developed than my AUs. I put a shit ton of work into everything I write, especially anything that requires research, so it’s not to say that I do less work per say, just that I feel like TAoL and things like it are more interesting and more developed, and the relationship feels.... somehow more to me there than in an AU.

a lot of my motivation really just comes from the lack of content this fandom had for so many years, and the fact that Naruto could have been a much more interesting series and I love worldbuilding so much. I think my motivation for each fic is different though. Like Alliance was started because I wanted to write something different from what was mainly in the fandom at the time because mind you I started that in 2010. But my motivation for TAoL is more wanting to tell a beautiful story with a complex narrative that looks at the failings of the shinobi world. Whereas like any slice of life fic is really just meant to be a fun break. And sometimes I write something literally just because I wanted to fulfill that trope for the GaaLee fandom--again, a lot of my ideas have been sitting for years and years and years (TAoL was an idea I had literally right after starting Alliance, but I didn’t get to it until 2017), so a lot of ideas that are old are because at the time that trope hadn’t been fulfilled yet in the fandom though that’s changing a lot with the recent GaaLee Renaissance of the last couple years.

HAPPY BDAY MILLIE!!!! welcome to the old ppl club, bingo night is every sunday and we have complementary prune juice

i will not drink my prune juice because it fucking yucky :/ thanks tho great-great-grandparent youre the best >:) 💖

beanmaster-pika replied to your post “why am I suddenly thinking a KHR farmer AU”

Would Xanxus run a raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanch and Squalo could organize thing like bingo night for the town's old ladies' association, ah? Ah? :D

Yeah pretty much. Xanxus was gonna keep bulls for no apparent reason and when asked about the lack of cows he would just throw bottles of milk at ppl

...And it was gonna be Bel organising bingo night????

Squalo was gonna have goats.

July 17 Dancitron Movie Night - Sing

Swoop and Tarantulas got in a small kerfuffle and Prowl sent a flying kick at Swoop, and honestly Prowl jumping into a fight with a Dinobot is easily the dumbest thing he’s done all month.

Soundwave, Tarantulas and Prowl hung out after movie night was over. The contents of said hangout are still being roleplayed out and the chatlog is forthcoming. Highlights of what IS included in this log: Tarantulas has promised to capture a bunch of cephalopods for Soundwave, Bevel, and Prowl to meet. (Prowl doesn’t really care about meeting them all that much, but he decided to come along anyway so that Soundwave gets to meet three more species.)

ItsyBitsySpyers 7:48 pm *Soundwave settles in on his usual spot, props his legs up with one feeler, and uses the other to give himself a head massage.* Swoop 7:50 pm *scampers in smelling like a furnace* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:50 pm [[Please smoke outside.]] Swoop 7:50 pm *which isn't measurably different from how he usually smells, but much more ... immediate this time around* What? Oh! Kehehehhehheh Me Swoop not on fire it okay :> *is a stinky stinker today, be prepared to get ash on all the things* best decepticon leader 7:52 pm ((We don't have Starbuck's here, is it good? FakeProwl 7:52 pm *appears, claims h is usual spot, and then gives soundwave a vaguely semi-concerned look. why headrub?* ItsyBitsySpyers 7:52 pm [[Try to contain your smell, then. We will have other guests.]] ((idk i don't like coffee haha)) Swoop 7:52 pm ((I don't drink coffee but their hot chocolate isn't bad.)) Uhh... how? Keheh FakeProwl 7:53 pm ((same. their ice tea tastes like ice tea, nothing super special. def overpriced.) Tarantulas 7:54 pm (( starbucks is like fancy-mcdonalds of coffee tbqh Bevel 7:54 pm [[starbucks is ok for like fastfood/chain shop coffee. i like their chai [[not much of a coffee drinker tbh Bay 7:56 pm (( *settles into chat* i didn't know who to bring, bc it's been a while. So for now I'm just a bunny 8D )) FakeProwl 7:56 pm ((eyyyy)) ((... i don't think i ever played with you on this account but hiiiiii)) ItsyBitsySpyers 7:57 pm ((fifteen minute warning. y'all get your snacks and drinks and bathroom breaks)) Swoop 7:57 pm ((thanks mom)) Bay 7:58 pm (( WELL idk about tumblr, but we've def played in the chat before -- looong time ago Bevel 7:58 pm [[roger roger, slender Bay 7:58 pm (( *with Prowl, I mean )) FakeProwl 7:58 pm ((did we?? which of your characters?)) Bay 7:59 pm (( I remember I came in as Jazz a few times? Unless there are secretly more Prowls than I'm aware of Bevel 7:59 pm [[all the prowls FakeProwl 7:59 pm ((............ you have too many characters, which jazz are you)) Bay 8:00 pm (( it was just an NPC Jazz on Twincast's blog boomtank 8:00 pm ((gdi bay Bevel 8:00 pm [[...was that my prowl? Swoop 8:00 pm Her Carly make a cake for Sparkplug birthday Chip say it taller than him And them laugh and then Sludge try to touch and it SMASH dead cake Bevel 8:01 pm *oh right here now just in time whoo, trudges over to her seat* Bay 8:01 pm ((...you know, now I'm doubting myself. HM.)) Swoop 8:01 pm *IS A BABY DRAGON sort of* FakeProwl 8:01 pm ((mighta been ur prowl, i don't specifically remember playing with an NPC jazz)) ((was the prowl you played with Aligned or IDW? im IDW)) Clich A 8:02 pm It is I, who is a bunny now apparently. Impact 8:02 pm *nyooms in* What's the moooovie? Swoop 8:02 pm *pretends to cough and pounds his chest so a little flame flickers out* *sparkplug taught him that one* :> Bevel 8:02 pm *makes room for tiny Impact* Impact 8:02 pm 3:D Bay 8:03 pm ((I do not recall. It was probably literally over a year ago at this point. I'mma give it a shrug. I remember them debating Twincast's defection to the decepticons, but that's about it? )) boomtank 8:03 pm -trots in and glances around for a seat- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:03 pm *Soundwave nods to the assorted newcomers and lifts his datapad to double-check the title. Once he sees what it is, he wonders why he even needed to do that.* [[Sing.]] Bevel 8:03 pm [[oh then it was probably definitely mine as it's been over a year since i've rp'd anything Tarantulas 8:03 pm *erring on the wrong side of caution, tarantulas arrives in root size, his usual mess of legs and fur, "sneaks" over to try and surprise prowl and/or soundwave* Swoop 8:04 pm *notices that he has dust, dirt, and/or ash falling off himself* FakeProwl 8:04 pm ((i don't remember that debate so yeah, prob not mine)) Swoop 8:04 pm *proceeds to jump somewhat in place to make a bigger mess* *good job swoop* Bay 8:04 pm ((Then I've had y'all mixed up for that long LOL. geez. this is what I get for crossing fandoms)) FakeProwl 8:05 pm ((i think we probably haven't played since i drifted off of starscream? unless we played on my drift at some point)) Swoop 8:05 pm *fuck clean floors, anarchy for life* Bay 8:05 pm ((I played w/ Drift as Kid. I know that for a fact. FakeProwl 8:06 pm ((THAT'S right. So it has been more recent than starscream.)) ((STILL. far too long.)) ((u jumped to megaman with butters, didn't you?)) Bevel 8:06 pm [[nice seeing you again, bay boomtank 8:06 pm ((Baaaaay what have you been up to? Bay 8:06 pm (( I DID and then to Yugioh & it's been. 8T I have regrets)) FakeProwl 8:06 pm ((lol)) ((how's that anime hell treating you)) Impact 8:07 pm ((i used to highkey adore yugioh but then the original series ended)) Bevel 8:07 pm [[*has been buried in the marvel fandom since leaving tf, so many regrets* FakeProwl 8:07 pm ((marvel's a rough place to be rn)) Bay 8:08 pm ((TBH there's a lot of drama in YGO and it's p elitist. idk. I play a filler character which means few ppl will give me the time of day)) Impact 8:08 pm ((awww, that sucks)) FakeProwl 8:08 pm ((tch. sucks for them.)) boomtank 8:08 pm ((their loss Bay 8:08 pm ((Also, I've had to make a whole new universe/timeline for every new character I encounter ((and I scream rl loud)) FakeProwl 8:09 pm ((ugh god ygo is one of those fandoms?)) Clich A 8:09 pm ((Oh wow, that can go to heckie.)) Bay 8:09 pm ((YEP FakeProwl 8:09 pm ((i can't STAND roleplaying in fandoms where everyone insists on a separate verse for every character interaction)) boomtank 8:09 pm ((that...kinda REALLY sucks Bevel 8:09 pm [[oh geez, i hate that FakeProwl 8:09 pm ((WHAT ABOUT CONTINUITY? WHAT ABOUT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT??)) Bay 8:09 pm ((there are a few group unis, but it's. ugh &&YEAH. P MUCH.)) Bevel 8:10 pm [[what about the fun of playing with eight different versions of the same character all at once and having to make up nicknames to keep them all straight Swoop 8:10 pm Soundwavwe ItsyBitsySpyers 8:10 pm *If Tarantulas has made his way over to Soundwave, he'll find that the feeler massaging Soundwave's head turns and tries to catch him instead* [[Yes?]] Swoop 8:10 pm This sound like Her Carly sleepy music You put on LOUD FUN stuff!!! Clich A 8:10 pm Got any Miles davis in this playlist? FakeProwl 8:10 pm ((you haven't truly roleplayed until you've made a "Soundwave liked this post" bingo card and couldn't even fit all the Soundwave URLs on it.)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:11 pm [[One something more Swoop's style and then that, as requested.]] Swoop 8:11 pm :> Bay 8:11 pm ((SO YEAH. I mean I've had some fun, but I wouldn't recommend it at all. 8'] I miss y'all regularly Clich A 8:11 pm Would Swoop enjoy "Screaming Jay" Hawkins? This is something I would like to know. boomtank 8:11 pm ((and your tf muses are still mia? FakeProwl 8:11 pm ((ur always welcome back here~~~)) Bay 8:12 pm ((don't tempt me)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:12 pm ((*tempt tempt*)) Impact 8:12 pm ((*teeeeempts*)) boomtank 8:12 pm ((come baaaaack FakeProwl 8:12 pm ((also im trying to bring starscream's blog back from the dead so, yknow, folks to interact with would be VERY welcome.)) Swoop 8:12 pm *is 1000% sure Jazz has played this song while they were training before* :> Bay 8:12 pm ((also I might have to refresh here a sec, bc I just realised there's nothing playing on my end & there probably should be lmfao)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:12 pm *Don't tell him. Someone already ruined Mr. Saxobeat.* FakeProwl 8:12 pm ((yeah, we got music going on here)) Swoop 8:13 pm *you're the one who can read minds, buddy* Bay 8:13 pm ((YEP THERE WE GO ((branch.io is very important)) Bevel 8:14 pm [[i came back as an updated version of an OC I used to play with minor plans for an old blog eventually Impact 8:14 pm ((:D)) Bay 8:14 pm ((fffff. I'd probably just come back as Twincast/his crew boomtank 8:14 pm ((awww Swoop 8:14 pm You Soundwave always do sitty music thing. Us do FIGHT stuff one day! Him Chip show games - Tekken, Mortal Kombat - fight tournament. THAT more than talky movie! Then OTHER dinobots come too!! Bevel 8:15 pm [[but bevel gets focus right now because OCs are a bit harder to establish tbh boomtank 8:15 pm ((boom gets to poke at twin again? Swoop 8:15 pm *JUMPS* Bay 8:15 pm (( /we *we'll see Tarantulas 8:15 pm *yeah, gonna try to dodge soundwave's feeler, probably fails because of the whole mess-of-legs thing* FakeProwl 8:15 pm *what's all this feeler waving abou—? oh.* Hi. boomtank 8:15 pm ((hehehe Swoop 8:15 pm *bounces straight into tara* Ka! Clich A 8:15 pm Ooh, nice, thanks Soundwave! ItsyBitsySpyers 8:16 pm *Also, the mun missed Prowl asking a question, so - a quick private text.* Clich A 8:16 pm WHo wants to big band dance with me? *Brow waggle* boomtank 8:16 pm -is just going to watch this mess of a room- Tarantulas 8:16 pm What's that sm - /ah/ Swoop 8:17 pm *catches onto a couple of tara's legs and just holds them* kehehehhehe Tarantulas 8:17 pm *ptero, meet spide* Impact 8:17 pm *wiggles by Bevel, gotta get comfy* Bevel 8:17 pm *pulls out a rust stick for Impact* Impact 8:17 pm *DELIGHTED GASP* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:18 pm @P: (txt): Sore spot. Backed into Buzzsaw sculpture during transport. Soundwave: fine. Tarantulas 8:18 pm Let go, let /go/, PLEASE. *not a fan. squirming legs will toss the kiddo around if he's not careful* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:18 pm ((ALL RIGHT SO... uh, I think there's flashing lights at some point and... and to be honest I watched this like two weeks ago so I don't remember well but I don't think there's much else?)) Swoop 8:18 pm *IMMEDIATELY clamps down once the wiggles start, it isn't even a thought, just an instinct* Tarantulas 8:19 pm *DEFINITELY not a fan* Lady306 8:19 pm ((wait I remembered a muse I could bring in w/o having to remember too much .u. )) Impact 8:19 pm ((oh?)) Swoop 8:19 pm *eventually all the parental lectures catch up with Swoop's body and he lets go* Bevel 8:19 pm *hopes this is a movie that's actually appropriate for Impact* Swoop 8:19 pm *but .... the setae feel weird on his hands* Lady306 8:19 pm ((306 -- assuming my name changes like it should)) Swoop 8:19 pm *better catch one in his fingertips and bring it with him* Bevel 8:20 pm [[it did ItsyBitsySpyers 8:20 pm ((one sec my audio glitched)) Tarantulas 8:20 pm *gonna get that servo slapped, swoop* What are you DOING. FakeProwl 8:20 pm *DISTRESSED TARANTULAS. Immediately zeroes in on the conflict.* Swoop 8:20 pm *bounces, holds up the yanked setae* Swoop grab! FakeProwl 8:20 pm *If it goes any further he's launching a flying kick at swoop's head* Lady306 8:21 pm *casually strolls in... not entirely sure what's going on, but he's going to get comfortable!* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:21 pm [[Let go, Swoop.]] ((oh ffs chrome... hold on y'all.)) Tarantulas 8:21 pm He can have the seta, for Primus's sake, but Swoop, you can't just - *inarticulate noises* Swoop 8:21 pm *cocks head* boomtank 8:22 pm -well, this is interesting to watch- Swoop 8:22 pm Can. DID! Keheheh. Tarantulas 8:22 pm You OUGHTN'T have Swoop 8:22 pm Why? Tarantulas 8:24 pm Because you don't just JUMP people you haven't - I mean, I /suppose/ we've met, but still Lady306 8:24 pm *if there's room somewhere over by Boom, he'll probably go sit by him, actually. It seems safe.* Swoop 8:24 pm Me Swoop am bomber :> ItsyBitsySpyers 8:24 pm ((OKAY FINALLY... sorry, y'all. my new computer is a glitchy piece of crap :| )) Tarantulas 8:24 pm The only bomber you are is a STINK bomber, by the way Swoop 8:24 pm ((pee on it to establish your dominance)) Impact 8:24 pm Animal movie! 3:D boomtank 8:24 pm Ah. Hello...um? Lady306 8:24 pm Hello, darling Swoop 8:24 pm Kehehehh! Yah. Me Swoop burn stuff *reaches up to try to touch the optics on Tara's forehead* FakeProwl 8:25 pm You might be a bomber, but Tarantulas is neither an enemy nor a target, and should not be treated as such. Tarantulas 8:25 pm *stands up straight for once so swoop can't reach* best decepticon leader 8:25 pm ((technical difficulties FakeProwl 8:25 pm Tarantulas, come over here. *he's going to be an anti-Dinobot shield* boomtank 8:25 pm -there's space, and Boom is probably a safe bet- Lady306 8:26 pm *and a cute bet* Swoop 8:26 pm *grabs tara's shoulder and steps on his knee to try to climb up* KEHEHEHEH Tarantulas 8:26 pm Ah - *don't have to tell him twice, prowl, tara's scrambling over to ya* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:26 pm *Makes room* Tarantulas 8:26 pm *and falling over because he got climbed on* FakeProwl 8:26 pm *THAT'S IT, THAT'S THE SIGNAL FOR THE FLYING KICK* Swoop 8:26 pm *SWOOP WINS* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:27 pm [[SWOOP.]] boomtank 8:27 pm -wait, what?- Swoop 8:27 pm Hi :> FakeProwl 8:27 pm *admittedly there isn't much weight behind a hollow holomatter avatar, but.* best decepticon leader 8:27 pm so dramatic ItsyBitsySpyers 8:27 pm [[Other side of the room or Laserbeak will not visit later.]] Tarantulas 8:27 pm *grumbling in a heap on the floor* Swoop 8:27 pm *is a bigger heap once Prowl hits and tara is the bottom of a pileup* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:28 pm [[Oh, for Primus' sake.]] Swoop 8:28 pm *is used to wrestling dinos so this is nothing* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:28 pm [[This is a movie night, not a brawl.]] Clich A 8:28 pm *Clutches spark* I love this song.. boomtank 8:28 pm ....whoever you are, I think we need to scoot over a bit more FakeProwl 8:28 pm *immediately rolls off and tries to rescue tarantulas from the bottom* Lady306 8:29 pm 306, but, ah, yes I tend to agree Swoop 8:29 pm *holds onto tara but whines at Soundwave* Me Swoop want to play with Bird! ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm [[Then let go.]] Lady306 8:29 pm *quietly obliges the not-request and scoots further over* Swoop 8:29 pm *holds up his hands but makes no other move* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:29 pm [[Now go sit down.]] Tarantulas 8:29 pm Last I checked, I'M not Bird, so go play with HER *grumble mumble* boomtank 8:30 pm -follows to keep out of the way of the pileup- Swoop 8:30 pm Nooo kehehehh YOU not BIRD at aaaaaaaalll Lady306 8:30 pm And... I assume you're a Blaster? boomtank 8:31 pm Yeah, that's me Tarantulas 8:31 pm *gonna use his legs and prowl to dislodge the graspless swoop and try to crawl over to the couch* Swoop 8:32 pm *giggles the entire time* You pokey bot Tarantulas 8:33 pm *nope, a BOPPY bot. swoop gets bopped on the helm crest* Lady306 8:33 pm @boom - I apologise if it's rude to ask, but I take it you're alone tonight? Swoop 8:33 pm :V keheehee FakeProwl 8:33 pm *follows Tarantulas, keeping himself between him and Swoo—* Tarantulas! Don't encourage him. Swoop 8:33 pm You bad at punches Tarantulas 8:34 pm That wasn't a punch! That was a minor tap! *whiny hiss* Swoop 8:34 pm Yah! It suck. boomtank 8:35 pm Hmn? Yeah, no one with me. FakeProwl 8:35 pm *points at Swoop* And you. YOU keep your hands off of Tarantulas unless he gives you permission to touch him. Swoop 8:36 pm *is OVERCOME by a desire to poke Tara* Lady306 8:36 pm *smiiiiles at* Then I suppose we'll have to keep each other company, hm? Impact 8:36 pm *dozes off* boomtank 8:37 pm Yeah? Aren't we already? Tarantulas 8:37 pm /Don't./ *he can see the desire in swoop's optics damnit* Lady306 8:38 pm *pfft* Technically, yes. boomtank 8:39 pm ...? Swoop 8:39 pm *has zero interest in the movie, stares tara down* FakeProwl 8:39 pm @Soundwave «Requesting permission to bridge Swoop out if he lunges for Tarantulas again.» boomtank 8:39 pm -confused tank noises- ItsyBitsySpyers 8:40 pm @Prowl: (txt): Granted. Coordinates here. *Gives* Swoop 8:40 pm *iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinches* FakeProwl 8:41 pm *reaches back to put a hand on Tarantulas's arm* Tarantulas 8:41 pm *squiiiiiiiints* Impact 8:41 pm ((too sleepy for movie night. i'm off guys. night!)) FakeProwl 8:41 pm ((gnight!)) Lady306 8:41 pm ((sleep well!)) best decepticon leader 8:41 pm ((night Clich A 8:41 pm ((SLeep welL!(( ItsyBitsySpyers 8:41 pm ((night!)) Swoop 8:42 pm ((night)) Lady306 8:42 pm @boom I just didn't expect you to be so cheeky. That's all Swoop 8:42 pm *crouches as he leans, getting almost down on all fours* Tarantulas 8:42 pm *whisperhiss* Prowl, can I test how fireproof my webs are? boomtank 8:43 pm Cheeky? Tarantulas 8:43 pm *too bad if you say no because he's gonna do it* Swoop 8:43 pm ((JESUS CHRIST)) Lady306 8:44 pm Yes, cheeky. FakeProwl 8:44 pm @Tarantulas «Unnecessary. If he tries anything else, he's being immediately ejected.» boomtank 8:44 pm What do you mean? Lady306 8:44 pm I was offering you company and you answered that we were already sharing it I'd call that cheeky boomtank 8:45 pm But...? We are? Swoop 8:45 pm *leeeeeeeeeeeeans forward slooooowly and reaches out with one claw tip for tara's leg* Lady306 8:47 pm *would it be rude to pat you? Because he wants to* FakeProwl 8:47 pm *bridge open underneath Swoop's feet* *bye-bye* boomtank 8:47 pm -go for it. he'd only get more confused- Swoop 8:47 pm *squeals all the way to the next location he'll terrorize* Lady306 8:47 pm *Then he will* Never mind. It's not important Tarantulas 8:48 pm *tara already started to shoot silk at swoop's servo - it gets cut off by the bridge when it closes* ItsyBitsySpyers 8:48 pm *Shakes his head. He was really hoping that wouldn't be necessary. And yet, he's not surprised.* boomtank 8:49 pm -more confused noises from the tank- Okay? Swoop 8:49 pm *and it'll happen again, since he's has punched and headbutted people at movie nights before, there is absolutely no way he learned a single thing* *finger guns* Lady306 8:50 pm ...also, have you been following this movie at all? boomtank 8:50 pm ...nope Lady306 8:50 pm Oh good, I was worried that I was the only one. boomtank 8:50 pm -waves data-pad- Been reading Tarantulas 8:51 pm I /had/ him, Prowl *huff* Lady306 8:51 pm You came here to *read*? That sounds rather counter-productive ItsyBitsySpyers 8:52 pm *Well, now that that's over, he'll focus himself more on the film. So much music. Soothing after a rough week and a bump and too much work.* FakeProwl 8:52 pm I'd rather you not need to have him. Bevel 8:52 pm *is following the movie more than anything happening in the room right now* Clich A 8:53 pm That is just impressive boomtank 8:53 pm It's the only place I can go for some peace ItsyBitsySpyers 8:53 pm [[She is a many-talented creator.]] Bevel 8:53 pm *claps* That was awesome! FakeProwl 8:53 pm Besides, he wanted a fight. If he'd got one, it would just encourage him to do the same thing. Lady306 8:54 pm Ah, fair, then... although, I might contest that tonight. *chuckles* What are you reading? ItsyBitsySpyers 8:54 pm *Thinks the word "praise" in honor of Whirl.* boomtank 8:55 pm True, true...and I'm reading reports Tarantulas 8:55 pm He wouldn't have /gotten/ a fight, he'd have gotten wrapped up! FakeProwl 8:56 pm He would have had something to struggle against. Come on. *gonna try to, guide tarantulas to the seat. we're sitting now.* Swoop 8:57 pm ((PFFF okay that was legitimately funny)) ItsyBitsySpyers 8:58 pm [[This is either a very power-efficient theater or that was a very inefficient O.]] Lady306 8:58 pm *helm tilt* Should I leave you to it, then? Tarantulas 8:58 pm Nnnn *more whining but he's coming to sit down. can has cuddles pls* boomtank 8:58 pm Nah, I'm good ItsyBitsySpyers 9:00 pm [[He dislikes the... the whatever that is. The pointy creature.]] Lady306 9:00 pm ((they're acting like 100 grand is a really huge amount. Honestly, a super fancy car like that is gonna be more than that)) Clich A 9:00 pm Looks like a Poorr cuiiie pine Tarantulas 9:00 pm *mumbles* Porcupine ItsyBitsySpyers 9:00 pm [[Porcupine. Thank you both.]] Clich A 9:01 pm OH NO YOU RUN OVER YOUR Never mind. FakeProwl 8:01 pm *yes. absolutely. rubs his back comfortingly* You're not damaged, are you? Where did he pull on you? Lady306 9:01 pm *quietly settles in closer to Boom then. Goodbye personal space* best decepticon leader 9:01 pm Wish I could hit Megatron Bevel 9:01 pm It cleaned the dishes. Awesome. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:02 pm [[If you do so, do it with a warp cannon.]] Swoop 9:03 pm ((what was that voice acting)) Bevel 9:03 pm *so impressed with the pink lady* boomtank 9:04 pm -whelp, he's not going to complain- Tarantulas 9:04 pm No, I'm not. *huff* Just because I'm partially organic doesn't mean I'm /fragile/. Lady306 9:04 pm *excellent. He'd pull you into his lap, but that seemed a bit much* boomtank 9:05 pm -Yeah, he'd be so confused if Lady did that- Tarantulas 9:05 pm *arms curling around, he's starting to sulk over prowl worrying so much, but cuddles are priority* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:06 pm *Glances over at the two of them.* FakeProwl 8:06 pm Good. *continues backrubs* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:06 pm *...Doesn't sound like a full-blown argument. He'll let them be.* FakeProwl 8:10 pm *okay. tarantulas is taken care of. looks at soundwave.* FakeProwl 8:11 pm @Soundwave «I apologize for my role in the altercation. It was inappropriate and counterproductive.» ItsyBitsySpyers 9:15 pm *Looks back, tilts his head.* (txt): Next time, suggestion: bridge first. However... Swoop: dangerous. Prowl: protected Tarantulas. Action basis: accepted, approved. Tarantulas 9:18 pm *is totally lost in the movie but there are animals so he's distracted well enough to sit still* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:18 pm *Small cringes at the bad notes.* FakeProwl 8:20 pm *slight nod. yeah. bridge first next time.* FakeProwl 8:21 pm @Soundwave «... How's your head?» Clich A 9:21 pm These are all good things to hear. Bevel 9:21 pm He should leave him there. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:21 pm [[Yes, he should. And what do you mean, good things?]] @Prowl: (txt): Ache decreased. Check-in appreciated. ((also: anyone who says they've never wanted to do this kind of thing in the store is a liarrrr)) Clich A 9:23 pm *Seat dancing* FakeProwl 8:23 pm ((i haven't gone to grocery stores with exciting enough music)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:23 pm ((:o i must tune your store to our store's channel)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:24 pm *Perks. Squid!* Bevel 9:24 pm Oh no. *laughs* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:25 pm ((what the hell is that menu. go away menu)) Lady306 9:26 pm ((butters is trying to steal me)) FakeProwl 8:26 pm ((get revenge. steal butters.)) boomtank 9:26 pm ((hehe ((yes ItsyBitsySpyers 9:28 pm *Scoot scoot* [[Bah. He wished to see more squid.]] Swoop 9:30 pm ((Why would they think he'd keep that kind of cash around?)) Lady306 9:30 pm ((ikr FakeProwl 8:30 pm ((seriously)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:31 pm [[Primus below.]] best decepticon leader 9:31 pm so... how many drown Clich A 9:31 pm apparently...just mike Lady306 9:31 pm None, apparently Tarantulas 9:32 pm I'm terribly sorry about your squids, Soundwave. Hyeh boomtank 9:32 pm .... Lady306 9:32 pm And that was also clearly not a very structurally sound building FakeProwl 8:32 pm ... Are the squid going to be okay in the sewer system? boomtank 9:32 pm That...went badly Swoop 9:32 pm ((omfg)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:32 pm [[...He hopes so.]] Bevel 9:32 pm Aww no. best decepticon leader 9:32 pm Probably not Swoop 9:33 pm ((how did a broken fishtank turn into the flashback from Pacific Rim?)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:33 pm ((the water pipes were still running)) best decepticon leader 9:33 pm Genius ItsyBitsySpyers 9:33 pm ((also: no $$$ for upkeep i guess)) [[Property of-- WHAT property?]] Tarantulas 9:34 pm There you are! Lady306 9:34 pm She's petty enough to claim the rubble just to spite him ItsyBitsySpyers 9:34 pm [[Oh, good.]] FakeProwl 8:34 pm Oh good. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:35 pm *Small huff. Jinx, Prowl.* FakeProwl 8:36 pm *thin smile at soundwave* Tarantulas 9:36 pm *craving cake now. are there treats? he's going to cast his gaze around for some* Lady306 9:36 pm Are we supposed to like the.. koala, was it? ItsyBitsySpyers 9:37 pm *Over on the bar, bowls full.* [[He thinks so.]] Lady306 9:37 pm Ah, pity boomtank 9:37 pm -huffs- Lady306 9:38 pm *yes Boom?* Tarantulas 9:38 pm *zoop goes the thread. that bowl is tarantulas's now* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:38 pm *LOUDER HUFF* Lady306 9:38 pm *..what* Bevel 9:38 pm ... Swoop 9:39 pm ((oh good god)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:39 pm *Doesn't know if this is hilarious or horrifying* Lady306 9:39 pm *horrifying* Tarantulas 9:40 pm *definitely hilarious* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm *Slowly looks over to Tarantulas* FakeProwl 8:40 pm *is trying to figure out what it is* Swoop 9:40 pm ((is anyone else remembering that scene with skids in the marvel comics and just.....)) boomtank 9:40 pm -just watching the show and kinda...no- Swoop 9:40 pm ((combining it.... with this....)) ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm [[...Are you a wash or dry spider?]] FakeProwl 8:40 pm PFF—!! *claps hand over mouth* Bevel 9:40 pm Ah, she is singing! Tarantulas 9:40 pm *FLOOFS UP* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:40 pm *Oh! What a voice.* boomtank 9:40 pm !!! Clich A 9:40 pm *falls prone, trying not to laugh* Tarantulas 9:41 pm I - I'm not dignifying that with an answer!!! *you're lucky he's not shoving you off the couch* Bevel 9:42 pm *giggles* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:42 pm *Dips his helm and places a smiley on his visor. Only meant in good humor, Tarantulas.* Lady306 9:42 pm Should they really be rebuilding on the property the bank repossessed? Tarantulas 9:42 pm *tarantulas hates that smiley so much* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:42 pm [[Probably not.]] Lady306 9:42 pm *also where did they get the money for it, anyway* FakeProwl 8:42 pm *it's an adorable smiley* Tarantulas 9:42 pm *a spider paw lands on the smiley and halfheartedly shoves* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:43 pm *Accepts the half-hearted shove with trembling shoulders* boomtank 9:43 pm -hums a bit and settles to watch the concert- FakeProwl 8:43 pm *... scoots closer to soundwave and tugs tarantulas closer* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:44 pm *Leans in.* Lady306 9:44 pm *also: cute* Tarantulas 9:45 pm *grumbles more but lets prowl pull him in* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:45 pm *PFF* Tarantulas 9:46 pm ...She looks like a cat pig peacock hybrid ItsyBitsySpyers 9:46 pm [[That is an interesting mental image.]] Tarantulas 9:46 pm *squints hard* FakeProwl 8:46 pm ... Getting ideas? Tarantulas 9:47 pm I'm not going to graft multiorganic chimeras, no, if that's what you're insinuating Bevel 9:47 pm They are gonna have like twenty more kids now. ItsyBitsySpyers 9:47 pm [[She can invent another machine to help her with them.]] Clich A 9:47 pm Please invent birth control Roseeta Bevel 9:47 pm Yeah! FakeProwl 8:47 pm Mm. Had to check. boomtank 9:47 pm That was fun boomtank 9:49 pm !!! Tarantulas 9:49 pm (( i love that this movie is basically advocating jailbreak for the sake of family love ItsyBitsySpyers 9:49 pm ((LOL)) boomtank 9:49 pm That...was probably a BAD idea Bevel 9:49 pm [[it also advocates running your family via machine ItsyBitsySpyers 9:50 pm *Looks at Prowl. How's he thinking about the prison break?* FakeProwl 8:50 pm *zero expression* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:50 pm *Ah, well.* Clich A 9:51 pm You cannot deny the power of a lorgee crowd Bevel 9:52 pm 😃 Tarantulas 9:53 pm *giggles a little, it's just like urticating hairs* Bevel 9:53 pm She is awesome. boomtank 9:53 pm These songs are fun Lady306 9:56 pm *um* boomtank 9:56 pm -snickering- Lady306 9:57 pm *is pretty sure the mouse should have been flattened* *not lifted* ItsyBitsySpyers 9:57 pm ((they do such a good job depicting stage fright. i have been her so often)) Tarantulas 9:58 pm *oh dear, tara has sudden feels for meena re: anxiety* Clich A 10:00 pm Wish they had..named..girl mouse. boomtank 10:02 pm Oh! It impressed her! Bevel 10:02 pm Yay FakeProwl 80:03 pm ... With that kind of structural damage, they should NOT be rebuilding on the ruins. They should have torn it down completely, removed the rubble, and rebuilt from scratch. Tarantulas 10:03 pm Oho, did you see the squids? *visor wink* best decepticon leader 10:03 pm they are not smart ItsyBitsySpyers 10:03 pm *Is delighted the squids are back* Bevel 10:03 pm *giggles* best decepticon leader 10:04 pm I would have thought that the squids would have been killed boomtank 10:04 pm That was a fun movie Lady306 10:04 pm It was.. something ItsyBitsySpyers 10:04 pm [[Hopefully it will not break again, then.]] boomtank 10:04 pm I liked the singing I guess I'm a bit biased FakeProwl 80:04 pm *... looks at soundwave* Do squids actually have biolights? Bevel 10:04 pm [[GDIT I KNEW I RECOGNIZED NANA Lady306 10:04 pm Oh, no, the actual singing was fine, but the rest of it... Bevel 10:05 pm [[*FLIPS TABLE* Tarantulas 10:05 pm *huffs, vaguely offended prowl would ask sw instead of him* Bevel 10:05 pm I liked it a lot. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:05 pm [[Some of them have bioluminescence, yes.]] FakeProwl 80:05 pm *soundwave spent over an hour lecturing prowl on a many-limbed earth sea creature. as far as prowl's concerned, he's the expert.* Clich A 10:05 pm Some Cuttlefish have rainbow style lights! Bevel 10:06 pm Can they change colors like that? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:07 pm [[There is a species which uses very tiny creatures living in it to glow based on the levels of light in the area. It is fascinating.]] [[It is a camouflage tactic.]] Bevel 10:07 pm Cool. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:07 pm [[And squid do change colors. Not... quite so neon as that. But others.]] boomtank 10:08 pm -and he's standing up now- Thanks for the movie, but I kinda have to go now. G'night ItsyBitsySpyers 10:08 pm *Soundwave nods farewell to Blaster* Bevel 10:08 pm Bye, Blaster FakeProwl 80:08 pm *... has a sudden realization* *didn't see a single dog singing* Lady306 10:08 pm Take care! FakeProwl 80:08 pm *inexplicably pleased* Lady306 10:08 pm ((LOL Tarantulas 10:08 pm *keeps going in and out of sulking and is considering faking a prior injury, now that he thinks of it* Clich A 10:09 pm Thanks for hosting Soundwave~! boomtank 10:09 pm ((g'night! Mun ahs to sleep! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm [[Quite welcome, Clich.]] best decepticon leader 10:09 pm ((night ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm ((night! sleep well!)) Tarantulas 10:09 pm (( night! Bevel 10:09 pm [[night! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:09 pm *Now, now, Tarantulas. You know many kinds of organics inside and out. He only favors the one. Let him have his moment.* Tarantulas 10:10 pm *psh, he's catching up on old sulking too from earlier. just give him some pets and he'll perk up* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:10 pm *Very well. Stretches a feeler behind Prowl to gently pat a spide shoulder.* FakeProwl 80:11 pm *has probably been petting him off and on all night tbh* Tarantulas 10:11 pm *moarrrr* Tarantulas 10:13 pm *squints, this is something he hasn't heard of actually* FakeProwl 80:13 pm *oh! educational videos! prowl's favorite.* best decepticon leader 10:13 pm ((I have to go Tarantulas 10:14 pm (( /waves ItsyBitsySpyers 10:14 pm ((aw! thank you for coming 😃 )) Bevel 10:14 pm [[night best decepticon leader 10:14 pm ((night, thanks for the stream FakeProwl 80:14 pm ((night!)) ... Do they have spots that glow? Bevel 10:14 pm [[prowl should to see rock dog, it definitely has singing dogs ItsyBitsySpyers 10:14 pm [[This variety.]] FakeProwl 80:14 pm ((i think he'd be inherently suspicious of the name)) Bevel 10:14 pm [[lol Bevel 10:16 pm *100% into this* FakeProwl 80:16 pm *already knows everything the narrator has said. is pleased.* Bevel 10:17 pm *has armor /and/ camouflage ha* FakeProwl 80:17 pm ... So the glowing ones have luminescent chromatophores, then? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:19 pm [[The ones he showed. Photophores. The others use... what are they called.]] Pause. Viruses? Plankton? [[Bacteria.]] Bevel 10:19 pm Cool! FakeProwl 80:20 pm ... Aren't bacteria like parasites? Do they kill the squid? Tarantulas 10:20 pm *finally speaks up* Generally they're symbionts. Bevel 10:20 pm I think bacteria make humans sick. Not squids. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:20 pm *Perks. Tarantulas knows of them?* FakeProwl 80:21 pm ... Do bacteria only prey on humans? *that one gets directed to Tarantulas* Tarantulas 10:22 pm No, they're quite literally everywhere and prey on mostly things that can't be seen, if they prey on anything at all Tarantulas 10:24 pm They - hm! *is surprised by video* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:24 pm ((one more and then i'll do music lol)) Tarantulas 10:25 pm Soundwave, have you ever actually /seen/ a live squid before? *not accusatory or anything* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:25 pm [[Not the Earth variety. Nevada is notoriously lacking in oceans.]] [[And they do not fly.]] FakeProwl 80:25 pm ... What about an octopus? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:26 pm [[He has not had the pleasure.]] FakeProwl 80:26 pm *that's tragic* Bevel 10:26 pm I want to see all of them. Tarantulas 10:26 pm Well then, I know what my next order of business is, hyeh FakeProwl 80:26 pm You should introduce him to an octopus. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:27 pm [[He can do that?]] Lean. [[You can do that?]] *Looks over to Bevel. He will show you, if Tarantulas does.* Bevel 10:27 pm *would enjoy that very much* Tarantulas 10:28 pm I - yes? Of course I can. *forgets that other people don't just snatch specimens from Earths for science things* FakeProwl 80:28 pm ... Can any species safely survive on Cybertron? Bevel 10:28 pm You could make an environment for them! ItsyBitsySpyers 10:28 pm [[...Oh. Yes. He would not want to terminate a cephalopod.]] Tarantulas 10:28 pm A few, but none you would have heard of, I'm afraid Bevel 10:29 pm My creator has a special building just for Earth plants. FakeProwl 80:29 pm I'm sure a room could be temporarily arranged for one to visit. Tarantulas 10:29 pm Why would we need a room when I have a /lab/? Bevel 10:30 pm A lab is a room. FakeProwl 80:30 pm ... Is your lab set up to support Earth's ecosystem rather than Cybertron's? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:30 pm *Knows very well about the plants. Is hiding one. >> * FakeProwl 80:30 pm ... Oh. Wait. It WOULD be set up for Earth, wouldn't it. *chimera experiments and all that.* Tarantulas 10:30 pm *snickers and shakes head. there we go* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:31 pm [[...Would it harm them if he touched one?]] Bevel 10:31 pm *not following but yeah ok if Prowl says his lab is set up for Earth she'll believe it* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:32 pm *Same. Because if it's not, and the creature(s) die, he'll be irritated* Tarantulas 10:32 pm I could calculate the force necessary to harm one if you needed, but I think you'll be able to tell on your own. That is to say, you'll be fine, don't worry ItsyBitsySpyers 10:33 pm *Slowly growing brighter. This is the best thing. If it happens.* Tarantulas 10:33 pm I don't know why people think organics are so fragile, they're - well, they are, but they're not THAT fragile Bevel 10:33 pm I want to see. Can I see too? Because squish. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:34 pm [[He is not accustomed to handling them.]] Tarantulas 10:34 pm Don't squeeze, and you'll be fine ItsyBitsySpyers 10:35 pm [[He knows how much strength to use to contain a flobster. Not an Earth lobster.]] Tarantulas 10:35 pm OH - but for Primus's sakes please don't electrify them ItsyBitsySpyers 10:35 pm *Looks at Bevel, and then Tarantulas and Prowl. Would she be able to see too?* FakeProwl 80:35 pm *looking back and forth as they talk/"talk", quietly delighted* *... why's PROWL being looked at? he didn't say anything* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:35 pm *He's the one who had the idea.* [[He would never.]] Tarantulas 10:36 pm ......I don't see why not, hm. *if he's letting sw into his lab, why not a mostly-stranger* Bevel 10:37 pm Yay! FakeProwl 80:37 pm *... sudden sharp vent in. oh. wait.* Bevel 10:37 pm *oh no what happened* FakeProwl 80:37 pm @Bevel «Don't visit his lab alone. Go when Soundwave goes.» Bevel 10:38 pm @Prowl <<...Ok.>> Tarantulas 10:39 pm Is there any particular species you'd be interested in meeting? Bevel 10:39 pm *perks at songs* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm *Immediately wants to say "all of them" and has to stop himself. He knows there are too many kinds for that.* Tarantulas 10:39 pm ....Pick three. Top three. Bevel 10:39 pm *wants to say all of them too* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm *His feelers twitch and writhe while he thinks. So hard to trim down* Bevel 10:40 pm Cuttlefish! *c'mon, Bossbot, we just watched a buncha videos about them and they are awesome* FakeProwl 80:40 pm ... Is that three per visitor or three total? Bevel 10:41 pm *hums along to the song while waiting for SW's opinion* Tarantulas 10:41 pm ...I suppose three per visitor, but the more you suggest, the longer it's going to take to obtain them FakeProwl 80:42 pm So that's nine choices. *yes he did just invite himself over.* @Soundwave «Give me your fourth, fifth, and sixth choices.» ItsyBitsySpyers 10:42 pm [[One pacific octopus. One bobtail squid. One pearly nautilus.]] *Pings Prowl with something akin to actual glee. Let him think.* FakeProwl 80:43 pm *carefully suppresses smile* Tarantulas 10:44 pm (( i'm tempted to throw "octopus's garden" at you for the lolz ItsyBitsySpyers 10:45 pm ((i'll do it when this is over 😃 )) Tarantulas 10:46 pm You're starting with some heavy-hitters there, hyeh But of course ItsyBitsySpyers 10:46 pm @Prowl: (txt): Mimic octopus, blue-ringed octopus, stubby squid. Bevel 10:46 pm Mimic octopus. The one that turns into other fish. FakeProwl 80:46 pm Mi— *stops* Bevel 10:46 pm *Bevel can't hear you Soundwave* FakeProwl 80:47 pm @Soundwave «... SEVENTH choice?» ItsyBitsySpyers 10:47 pm @Prowl: (txt): Firefly squid. FakeProwl 80:48 pm *to be safe, he's waiting until they hear Bevel's third choice* Bevel 10:48 pm Are there really big ones? I want to see a really big one. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:49 pm ((what is with youtube not having this)) Tarantulas 10:49 pm That'd be the pacific octopus, as mentioned FakeProwl 80:49 pm ((... are there different octopus gardens?)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:49 pm ((i was trying to find the actual one but i guess it's not on YT)) ((this version will be fine)) Tarantulas 10:49 pm (( oh my god.... beautiful. i/she were referring to the beatles one, but the copyrights are fiddly on the beatles Bevel 10:50 pm [[apple likes to take their songs down a lot yeah Tarantulas 10:51 pm There are larger squids, though Bevel 10:51 pm Really really big? Tarantulas 10:51 pm ...Although I oughtn't have brought them up, I'm not tracking down a colossal squid Bevel 10:51 pm Aww ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm *Damn.* Tarantulas 10:52 pm They're larger than I am - well, larger than I currently am Bevel 10:52 pm ...awesome. [[not sure how big tara is atm but it's probably impressive for an earth critter Tarantulas 10:53 pm (( tara's 32ft, squid can be upwards of 40ft Bevel 10:54 pm [[lol Bevel's as tall as that squid right now Tarantulas 10:54 pm (( xD nice Bevel 10:54 pm [[i love this skit so much Bevel 10:55 pm Something that glows that Soundwave did not pick. *she knows you picked glowy ones* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm [[Hmph.]] [[He knows what he likes.]] Tarantulas 10:56 pm How about we make it chef's choice~? Pick of the day ItsyBitsySpyers 10:56 pm ((me: what are good classic sesame street bits? me: oh! i know. it's not easy being green. me: nO NO NO)) Tarantulas 10:57 pm (( sdgsfg FakeProwl 80:57 pm ... You're not going to eat them when we're done? ItsyBitsySpyers 10:57 pm [[What do you mean, CHEF.]] Bevel 10:57 pm *knows she'd like to see a huge mcfuckoff squid but reasons* Tarantulas 10:57 pm *snickering* No, probably not. I'm not fond of the texture. Bevel 10:57 pm I do not want that kind of energon either. FakeProwl 80:58 pm If you're going to eat cephalopods, at least don't eat the ones we'e befriended. *is expecting soundwave to make friends with them all* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:59 pm *You bet he's going to. He's going to try listening to their spread out minds too* Bevel 10:59 pm *is going to want to make a robot one for a pet* Tarantulas 10:59 pm You can't really - hyeh. As you wish. Tarantulas 11:00 pm Wh - ItsyBitsySpyers 11:00 pm ((i forgot that was in there omg)) Bevel 11:00 pm *laughs* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:01 pm ((i'm so sorry)) [[...He did not expect this.]] Tarantulas 11:01 pm *hard side-visor at sw* FakeProwl 81:01 pm *extremely neutral face* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:02 pm [[He only knew it was a parody of a human film we have seen. His apologies.]] FakeProwl 81:03 pm *what an important lesson that most Autobots NEVER LEARNED* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm *The listening?* FakeProwl 81:03 pm *unfortunately, yes* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm *Perhaps Prowl should anonymously send them that.* ((one more and then back to music)) FakeProwl 81:03 pm *he's sure they wouldn't listen to it* Tarantulas 11:03 pm *alas, if mesothulas had listened either* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm ((their parodies are usually p funny)) Bevel 11:04 pm ...*starts giggling and probably not going to stop until this is over* Mount Crumb Tarantulas 11:06 pm *...this is strangely uncomfortable for tarantulas, moreso than the ridiculous spider* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:06 pm *Soundwave's quietly dying inside. He didn't know this would have eggs.* *He'll never convince Tarantulas he didn't mean this.* Bevel 11:06 pm *in hysterics now* Tarantulas 11:07 pm *pfft he's not even thinking about the eggs actually, but NOW YOU MENTION IT* FakeProwl 81:07 pm *is it the self control, tarantulas.* Tarantulas 11:07 pm *shh maybe* Tarantulas 11:08 pm *.....he forgot about the snacks he snagged, they're just sitting there in his ding dang lap* Bevel 11:08 pm That was funny. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:08 pm *Is he gonna do it.* Bevel 11:09 pm *he did it* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:09 pm *No, no. Is Tarantulas gonna eat the bowl of snacks.* Bevel 11:10 pm *he definitely should* Tarantulas 11:10 pm ...Are you trying to pull some sort of reverse psychology here ItsyBitsySpyers 11:11 pm [[Not at all. He's simply suggesting that you enjoy the snacks you claimed. He can't put them back now.]] Tarantulas 11:12 pm *is tempted to subspace them just to spite u* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:12 pm *That's fine, too. Just leave him the bowl.* Tarantulas 11:13 pm *he subspaces MOST of them and slips one snack in between his mandibles before plopping the bowl in sw's lap. THERE* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:13 pm *Sets the bowl down. Fussy, fussy.* Tarantulas 11:14 pm (( omg cro (( like GONE gone? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:15 pm ((they're on the dead laptop)) Bevel 11:15 pm [[oh honey Tarantulas 11:15 pm (( 😨 sorry FakeProwl 81:15 pm ((oh no)) Tarantulas 11:17 pm *hm. mandibles. he never DID get to talking to bevel about them now did he* Bevel 11:18 pm *nope he did not, though Bevel's been lectured by Prowl and SW now* Tarantulas 11:20 pm @Bevel : «I JUST remembered. We never did have a proper mandibular demonstration. Might you be interested in popping over early before the cephalopod showing, just to sate a little of my scientific curiosity?» FakeProwl 81:22 pm *... scoots hip against tarantulas's, leans shoulder against soundwave's, and dims his optics* Bevel 11:22 pm *had been about to leave and halfway to standing up when she was pinged. she drops back down into her seat awkwardly* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:23 pm *Contemplates Bevel's presence. Decides he doesn't particularly give a damn if she sees. Gives Prowl's avatar a helm nuzzle and makes sure not to wiggle too much* FakeProwl 81:23 pm *nuzzles back* Tarantulas 11:24 pm *arm around prowl's waist, with his other paw scooping up some snacks from his subspace because you can't eat just one* FakeProwl 81:25 pm *puts a hand over tarantulas's paw.* *this is nice.* Bevel 11:26 pm *...awww, the mystery of SW's Prowl is solved. too bad she's not able to appreciate it since she has to awkwardly navigate a conversation over comms* @Tarantulus «Um, maybe. I got to see if Soundwave has to bridge me over since I do not think you want Blurr to know where your lab is.» Tarantulas 11:27 pm @Bevel : «Oh, there's no need. I have portal technology of my own, I can pick you up at your desired coordinates.» Bevel 11:29 pm *welp* Tarantulas 11:29 pm *welp indeed* Bevel 11:33 pm *ok frag it, she's an adult, even if he is apparently some sort of mass shifter who could outsize her by... a lot.* @Tarantulus «...Just mandibles?» *i'm an adult she says. caves immediately to pressure* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:34 pm *Someone somewhere is making a bad decision. He can feel it in his spines.* *...Probably Frenzy.* Bevel 11:34 pm *definitely frenzy* Tarantulas 11:34 pm @Bevel : «Yes, whatever you're comfortable with.» *in other words, whatever tarantulas can reasonably get away with* Bevel 11:37 pm *mentally decides to show up like ten minutes before Prowl and Soundwave so Tara will have very little time to actually poke too much at her. it's like following their advice except not at all yeah* @Tarantulus «Ok.» Tarantulas 11:38 pm @Bevel : «Lovely! We'll set things up once I've acquired the - cephalopods, then.» *almost said "the other specimens" instead* FakeProwl 81:39 pm ((run bevel, run)) Bevel 11:39 pm *nods and now she is going to leave before she either agrees to more or something else happens yep yep* Tarantulas 11:40 pm *visor winksmile at bevel as she goes* FakeProwl 81:41 pm *... is the coast clear?* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:41 pm *Waves farewell with a feeler. Lots of little wiggly tendrils goodbye.* Bevel 11:41 pm *waves to room and dodges out the door as fast as her big bulk will take her* FakeProwl 81:42 pm ... YOU'RE not the one who sent me this song, are you? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:42 pm *Soft puff.* FakeProwl 81:43 pm ... Is that a confession? *the room is down to three. excellent. pulls his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around them.* Tarantulas 11:44 pm *little bit of squinting at sw&prowl, but is gonna cuddle real close to prowl when he pulls his knees up* *....while also eating snacks one by one. because why not* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:46 pm [[Consider it signed.]] *Stretches arm behind Prowl's back. It just so happens to also nudge Tarantulas a wee lil lil bit while it's there.* FakeProwl 81:46 pm Hmm. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:46 pm [[Thank you again for the opportunity to meet cephalopods up close, Tarantulas.]] FakeProwl 81:47 pm ... You're welcome to continue sending cheesy police-themed love songs. Tarantulas 11:47 pm *also gotta be conscious of - that. yes. not touching soundwave, except soundwave touched HIM, so. alright then* FakeProwl 81:47 pm Oh. I didn't give you my list of three. Tarantulas 11:47 pm Ah, no you didn't. I figured you hadn't made one yet FakeProwl 81:48 pm Blue-ringed octopus, stubby squid, and firefly squid. Tarantulas 11:48 pm ...You asked Soundwave, didn't you FakeProwl 81:48 pm *poker face* Tarantulas 11:49 pm I SUPPOSE that counts. They're wonderful choices, just not simple to get a hold of FakeProwl 81:50 pm Are any simple to get hold of? Tarantulas 11:50 pm Hyeh, I didn't mean literally, physically I'd be hard-pressed to actually catch one. It's just a matter of commonness And their global distribution FakeProwl 81:52 pm ... Not prohibitively difficult? ItsyBitsySpyers 11:52 pm *Almost suggests raiding an aquarium. Remembers Prowl is there and thinks better of it* Tarantulas 11:52 pm I shouldn't think so. Not the ones we've listed, at least. That's why I nixed the colossal squid. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:53 pm [[Perhaps if you had tanks, and a way to locate them, he could...]] *Trails off. Now thinking about what would happen if he opened a small bridge in the middle of the ocean and ran it past a squid* Tarantulas 11:54 pm Hyeh, no, I can manage on my own just fine. *has plenty of reasons why not to get sw or prowl involved* FakeProwl 81:55 pm ((nice album cover. two thumbs up. A+)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:56 pm ((LOL)) [[Very well.]] Tarantulas 11:56 pm *nom. nomnom* FakeProwl 81:56 pm ... Don't do anything destructive to the environment or human property. Tarantulas 11:57 pm Tsk, don't worry so much, Prowl. Of course not. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:57 pm [[Or to the creatures you're capturing.]] FakeProwl 81:58 pm *don't say "of course not" like u would actually have compunctions against destroying someone else's property if prowl didn't tell you to have compunctions* Tarantulas 11:59 pm *shush let tarantulas tell prowl what prowl wants to hear* FakeProwl 81:59 pm Or that. We'd prefer them to be cheerful guests. ... Or whatever passes for "cheerful" in cephalopods. Yesterday Tarantulas 11:59 pm Lively. Lively and eating well, I'd say Tarantulas 12:00 am They'll be perfectly cheerful, rest assured. FakeProwl 82:01 am *nods. good. wants soundwave to have A Good Time* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:01 am *Very low, very quiet hum* [[Perhaps we could see more of your lab when we are done with them?]] FakeProwl 82:01 am *a sound!!* *leans on a little more* Tarantulas 12:03 am *wavers* ...Mmmaybe. We'll see. I'm not sure what of the lab you even COULD see, safely. Best not to worry about that now though ItsyBitsySpyers 12:04 am *Now you have his attention* [[Why? What is unsafe about it?]] *Doesn't want to move and dislodge Prowl; peers around him with feeler* [[Surely there are precautions he could take.]] FakeProwl 82:05 am *usually would be peering with soundwave. can't work up the giveafuck for it.* Tarantulas 12:07 am *it occurs to him he could invite sw in holo like prowl and avoid quite a few many things that way, hm. more thoughts he'll keep to himself* Tarantulas 12:09 am Not so much for you as for everything ELSE. There would simply be so many things to take into consideration, and depending on which hallways we choose, it just - it's /complicated/ *half true* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:10 am *Considers this. Shockwave's lab moves its insides around and can be dangerous to roam unattended. Maybe the "depending on which hallways" means something like that.* *...He'd better not try to sneak off after the cephalopod meeting.* [[He understands. Just this, for now.]] [[Though if there is anything else you wish to show off, he might be curious.]] FakeProwl 82:11 am *assumes tarantulas means that a few hallways exploded and are now too dangerous to travel* Tarantulas 12:12 am Of course you would be. *he knows that curiosity well by now* *ok what. he can't not hear rihanna* ...Soundwave, are you still in charge of the playlist? ItsyBitsySpyers 12:14 am [[Why? Is there something you'd like to request?]] FakeProwl 82:14 am *... if soundwave is going to be staying after the cephalopod meeting to explore part of the lab, then it would be inappropriate for prowl to not stay as well, since he's the one who's into that stuff. which means he'll be staying longer.* *is suddenly exhausted about a social interaction he hasn't even gone to yet.* Tarantulas 12:16 am Nnnnot in particular, but I - am... questioning that song choice ItsyBitsySpyers 12:16 am *"The one who's into that stuff," as if he doesn't like learning about everything Shockwave does too* FakeProwl 82:16 am *okay, the OTHER one who's into that stuff* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:17 am [[Ah. It's against your musical tastes, then. He'll be sure to find other artists in the future.]] Tarantulas 12:17 am *hard squint, but sure, he'll... go with that* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:17 am *He knows full well what Tarantulas means and is having a bit of fun* *As can be currently heard by the continuation of a theme* FakeProwl 82:18 am *nudges Soundwave* Puppet Man is good. Similar theme, different genre than the first two. *has picked up on the theme; hasn't realized it's being used as deliberate teasing* 5th Dimension. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:18 am [[He does not know this one.]] *Immediately puts it on.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:20 am *...Vaguely uncomfortable with this one.* FakeProwl 82:20 am *well PROWL likes it* Tarantulas 12:20 am *is just going to eat, because that's always a stabilizing thing right. gonna turn his head and pop a dozen snacks in where they can't see well* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:20 am *It's good, it's just - he wouldn't have thought of it as being part of the same theme if Prowl hadn't said. His mind went somewhere else first.* [[He knows you have the snacks. You don't need to hide.]] FakeProwl 82:21 am *look on the bright side: you probably just learned something new about prowl's sex life* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:21 am *Yes. Yes, he has.* *And in that respect, he is interested. And maybe wondering if Tarantulas shares it.* FakeProwl 82:22 am *... and it's a good thing prowl isn't thinking too hard about the song right now or else HE would be uncomfortable too* Tarantulas 12:22 am *tara wasn't paying much attention to the lyrics so he's chill rn* FakeProwl 82:23 am *but he decided he liked the song before it acquired what would have been very negative connotations, so as long as he doesn't listen too hard he's safe* Tarantulas 12:26 am *well, maybe not entirely chill, he did just give an awkward twitch and laugh some as he swallowed* Hyeh, I'm - not hiding the /snacks/, that'd be silly ItsyBitsySpyers 12:26 am ((that is not the song i was remembering oop)) ItsyBitsySpyers 12:28 am [[...Ah. Do you not consume fuel in public? He apologizes.]] *Immediately withdraws the feeler* Tarantulas 12:29 am *snickers some, actually* No, not generally, but - I was considering /your/ comfort here, not mine FakeProwl 82:30 am That's good. *uncrosses one arm to pat Tarantulas's... knee? yeah, knee works.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:32 am [[It is not as....]] *Fishes around for a word. Can't find it.* [[He knows to expect the noise. It is less distracting that way.]] Tarantulas 12:34 am *nudges more into prowl at the touch, touch is good* Tarantulas 12:36 am *smol helm tilt* Hm, is it just the sound that might disorient you then? Because I was considering the entire - well. You call them mandibles, but I've more than mandibles technically FakeProwl 82:36 am *more touch? thigh. thigh touch.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:37 am [[It is both, in truth. But he should try to become accustomed to this sooner or later.]] Tarantulas 12:38 am *paw touch on thigh touch* Tarantulas 12:39 am I see. *restraining urge to click his mandibles now, heh* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:45 am [[...You are not required to, of course. You may eat in unseen peace, if you wish. He was simply - commenting. On it.]] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:47 am *Wasn't sure how much contact was permissible in this shared couch sort of situation; going to test the example set by Prowl and curl the feeler he withdrew from Tarantulas' vicinity up and around Prowl's lower leg. Maybe absently pet the armor with the tendrils.* Tarantulas 12:48 am Hyeh, not required to - ? Would you /like/ to see, then? *genuinely wasn't sure, is also very much looking at prowl too* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:49 am [[...................................Yes.]] FakeProwl 82:49 am Yes. *doesn't even know he's being looked at, he just felt like throwing that in* FakeProwl 82:51 am *shifts a bit to get a better view if tarantulas is going to—something's on his leg. glances down. hmm. puts his other hand on soundwave's thigh.* Tarantulas 12:53 am *can't help but laugh a bit at soundwave's hesitance, and shifts while they move around too* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:53 am *Fluffs the armor a bit to make more room for seam stealing and joins the watching* FakeProwl 82:54 am *not going to be as adventurous tonight, there's another person here* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:55 am *As he wishes. Soundwave's thigh armor comes with sizable gaps anyway, pff. Either way: he is, notably, pleased.*

Textual Contact

chapter 3 × feat. Michelangelo

Y: hey ^>^

R: sup shortstack

Y: nm tallstack

R: thats horrible..

Y: wut?

R: tall stack? Really? Whered u learn that. School for the uncreative

Y: hey!

R: hey 😄

Y: 😒

R: so whats up?

Y: nm honestly. Im in gym.

R: And?

Y: its boring. U run around inside a room with smelly boys and snotty girls

R: its good for you

Y: shaddup

R: lol

Y: wbu?

R: im chillin. My second work out starts in 10 minutes.

Workout schedule: 6am-10am-3:00pm-7:30pm

Y: and where does training come into play?

R: whenever dad schedules it

Y: oooooh tell me about ur dad. Plz.?

R: uugh ur soooo wantttyyyyy

Y: yes..yes i am

R: lol well hes old, we were all orphans and he took us under his wing. Hes really been there for all of us. Even if we arent blood related.

Y: wow. Didnt see that coming. At all.

R: XD

Y: thats really sweet of him. So like what? U guys lived on the streets. Or orphanage's?

R: well we were just babies at the time so I dont remember

Y: oh alright

R: wbu. I dont know anything about you and im just spilling my guts

Y: ewwww!!

R: what

Y: thats so graphic! Omg the imagining in my head right now. -barfs- 😷😦

R: Lol so?? Tell me.

Y: well i live in bronx and Ivd been here for the last 8 years. I moved when i was just a girl. Life has been alright. I could do without the cat calling from guys. Its pathetic. I dabble in art sometimes. Only when im in the mood. I go to school (duh). I; just like any girl love to cook and bake. I just got into yoga.

R: nice. So what can u bake me?

Y: bake u? Like.. for u?

R: yeah

Y: practically anything. But i wanna see this ✌family✌ first.

R: quotes? really? Make me sound like a liar. Whats wrong wit' chu.

Y: well mmeehhhhh to u too grumpy

R: pfft 😝😝

Y: hey i gotta go. Gym teacher is walking my way.

R: mk

~3 hours later~

M: hheey gurrrlll

Y: lol nm. Wbu raphie kins

M:..are u raphs secret girlfriend or something. Cause only i call raph stuff like that.

Y: 😐 who is dis? Isnt this raphs account.

M: yeah im that kind of brother. So what's ur name sweetcheeks??

Y: y/n

M: ooh Mikey Likey.

Y: mikey? That's ur name

M: well my name is much longer so ppl call me mikey.

Y: oooohh. OH u must have a renaissance name too!

M: bingo

Y: whats ur whole name

M: eehhhh idk if i wanna tell you. Ur kiinndaaa short.

Y:....wut

M: ur kinda short

Y: well ur kinda weird

M: why thank you (Casinova voice)

Y: 😳

M: so tell me. How did u meet leo and then raph?

Y: leo texted me first by Accident thinking i was someone named april. Then leo used raphs phone which led me to talking to raph.

M: makes sense. So u like to bake?? I love baking! Im trying to make my own dish but i cant seem to get any right.

Y: oooh~ whats ur dish?

M: well it tends to vary. I tried to make a carrot lasagna. Failed ✖ Marble pancakes. Something went wrong there. ✖ I tried making chocolate covered asparagus. Failed✖

Y: oo so ur going all out?

M: yea.

Y: maybe i could help. Maybe i could finally meet ur family.

M: oh~ um. I dont think dad would like that. He doesnt like new ppl.

Y: but everyone loves me 😃😃😗

M: lol that may be true (idk) but i shouldnt disobey.

Y: ur family is very different from others ive met. Its like ur hiding. U guys dont go to a public school. Ur home schooled. U cant share ur 'Training' with me.

M: ..well its complicated. But lets not talk about that.

Y: but i want tooooooo

M: nu

Y: yeash

M: nu nu

Y: fine.. what do u do for hobbiez??

M: well i love gaming. I read comics. I guess u could say knunchucks are my passion. I use them everyday. I love movie nights OH and pizza friday. Llovveeeee pizza. Im sometimes my older brother's assistant. He's a nerd. Hes all sciency and stoof. Oh and im a drummer

Y: knunchucks!  😵😵 Wow bro. ..just wow. Thats awesome! Thats a ninja weapon right?

M: yea. But i live by a non-assassin code.

Y: wait... Is ur guyses training.. is it ninjitsue????!😱😱

M: ...nu

Y: awe. I was all excited for nothing

M: lol

Y: so whatcha doin

M: texting u during training

Y: lol so u stole raphs phone?

M:😈😈

Y: lmao so whats going on during training?

M: raph and don are in one team while Im on the other team with lameanardo.

Y: lmao ppl dont like leo?

M: hes like Secondary dad

Y: really? I havent noticed. Like legit havent noticed. No sarcasm in this.

M: lol well if u really knew him. Youd understand.

M: i gotta go. Leo and splinter are on my butt about me on raphs phone.

Y: Lol figured raph would be more on u than the others.

M: lol tru. Ttyl

Y: kk

~since its after school and ur at home. U decided to go for a walk with earbuds.

You clicked ur earbuds into the headphone jack and grabbed a pop tart before u left ur parents apartment. You opened the door to fell a perfect autumn breeze in the cool air. You slipped on your light blue sweater with dark blue lining. Your (hair brushed out/hair in a pony tail.) You locked your door and started walking. You walked around for 40 minutes. Your elbow got caught on the wire of your headphones making them pop out of your ears. You Ughed as you tried putting them back in. You stopped when you heard a trashcan lid fall. You froze as you looked down the sunset shadowed alleyway. You narrowed your eyes adjusting your vision. You saw something trying to stand still but you saw it move just a little as it was breathing. Your eyes grew wider in fear. you continued walking but then turned around to look at the alley one more time to make sure u werent imagining it. You didnt see anything. You felt something touch your ankle. You screeched with a jump back as you looked down to see a taby cat. You exhaled as you then looked up to see it was getting dark. A "let me out im stuck in your pocket" notification tone went off. You looked down to see Leo texted you. you answered his text as you walked away from the alley. Up above on a fire escape crouched over in the alley was someone watching you answer the text with their green eyes. They narrowed as they watched you walk.

L: hey

Y: aye 😀

L: whatcha doin?

Y: just walking around ny wbu

L: same

Y: maybe ill bump into you 😎

L: doubt it XD we're looking down at our phones.

~you laughed out loud by an apartment Leo was ontop of. Leo looked over the edge to see a girl on her phone. As she texted

Y: lol so tru

L: so where are you anyways?   ~ leo heard a Let me out of your pocket notification from down below. He looked back down at the girl still standing there

Y: Im at est. N' broadway

L: ohh i see.

~ he heard the notification tone once again. He rose a brow at this point.

Y: wbu??

L: im no where near u ~leo lied considering thats exactly where he was~

Y: im getting hungry. Ooh i see s hotdog stand! Yaassss!!

L: lol

~leo saw the girl go and get a hotdog from Oscars dogs

His eyes widened realizing he practically met you at this point. "Dude is it time to go home yet??" Mikey whined "yea no kidding. Im tired." Donnie joined in as he held his shoulder in his grasp as he moved his arm in three huge circles. "yea; you guys can go. Im gonna stay behind." Leo told them. Raph just arrived to the roof after his run. "sorry. Someone almost saw me." Raph explained. "leo said we're done for the day." Raph looked over at leo looking over the edge. He walked over to his brother and looked down. "ooh-ho-ho your stalking a girrrllll." Raph pointed out as he stood tall and confidentiality. Leo stood up from "i am not! Im just seeing if this girl is who i think she is." Raph rose a brow with his arms crossed. Leo rolled his eyes "fine im kinda stalking her." "Why??" Mikey asked. "I think its the girl ive been talking to. Also raphs been talking to." "Also me." Mikey included himself. "how come i havent met her??" Don asked feeling left out. "well i stole raphs phone to talk to her." Mikey explained.

Y: okay got my weener! 😂

Leo looked down at his phone. "oh shes texting u right now??" mikey asked enthused. "Maybe.." leo answered without looking at mikey and his brothers as he texted you. "Ooohh let me see!" Mikey tried swiping it from leos hands to only let leo dodge. Don slipped it out of his fingers as he blocked leo with his bo staff twirling in front of leo blocking him. "sorry my brothers are distracting me." Don read aloud. "give it back!" Leo demanded as he tried grabbing it from his tall brother. Looking completely short compared to his little brother. Leo stopped As he huffed annoyed at his brother as he scrolled through the convo. Leo then Drew his sword and whacked his brother on the wrist with the handle. The phone dropped out of his grasp and leo swooped down with his hand and saved it.

Y: ??

L: sorry my brother took my phone away as a joke cause hes a Jackass.

Leo typed as he spoke aloud everyone what he was typing. "a jackass huh?" Don rose a brow as he crossed his arms "yes. Now im leaving to somewhere else. Where u cant bother me." "Dude. We know where u live. We can take the phone any time we want." Mikey informed him. Leo flaunting his phone as he said " i can hide my phone." He smirked and then jumped to the next building. he lost you. His brother's distracted him for too long.

Y: so whatcha doin?

L: just walking around still. Wbu

Y: oh just walking home. My stomach doesnt feel to Good. That hot dog didnt agree with me at all.

L: sue em'

Y: lol no ty. Idk why but i really wanna go to an art museum or something. Weirdest craving ever.

L: lmao well imma head home. Ttyl y/n 🤓

Y: 😊😎

Tagged by @fairyqueenmira and @musicalmientus (thank u so much!!! u both seem rly cool and I feel like I’ve somehow tricked u into tagging me in this tbh)

Rules: tag 20 blogs you want to get to know better

Okay I filled this out last night and fell asleep halfway through tagging ppl and I’m too lazy to change whatever the heck I wrote so?? Y e a h.

Nickname: I don’t have one But my chem teacher posts our grades with codenames and mine is Moritz so I’m ? going with that 

Zodiac sign: Leo 

Height: Like? 5′6? I used to be rly tall when I was a kid but I stopped growing and everyone else didn’t and I still forget that other ppl are taller than me sometimes it’s kind of hilarious tbh 

Last thing I googled: google docs 

Favorite music artists: Watsky, P!ATD, Stromae, and David Bowie are all that’s coming to mind? Some musicals I love listening to tho are Spring Awakening (which is surprising to no one, I’m sure lmao), Side Show, bare, and Chicago. 

Last Movie I watched: Sugar Coated (im assuming documentaries count? idk a good one tho)

What I am wearing right now: that’s up to you and your imagination ;* (really fuzzy purple polka dot pants and an old oversized DC tshirt. nice n comfy)

Why did I choose my URL:  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (idk I think it’s pretty clea r)

Do I have any other blogs: A bunch! My main is @foolishsmartsandhowtolosethem (c a n o n movie title h*ck yeah) @kylerook is my not-spring awakening musical blog @ilovehanschenrilow is mostly shitposts/Bad Things  @iloveernstrobel is my aesthetic/animal blog @ilovecredencebarebone is a blog for another boy I lov (not rly active there anymore tho,, 2 much gr*dence in that fandom it’s gross tbh) (also r u seeing a pattern w these urls lmao) @credencebareboneart is for Credence Barebone Art @weirdgoosebody is my art blog that I never use bc im ? lazy  @littlerathands is an art ref blog that i don’t update as much as i would like bc I hate tagging but also im dedicated to tagging Well. there r so many things in the drafts rip.  @b99bingo is exactly what it sounds like,, bingo for 4 brooklyn nine-nine

and last(i think?), but certainly not least, @vorenomore is where I voreshame Ryan @melgayiorgabor

What did my last relationship teach me: I don’t remember my last relationship tbh? Like, it’s been too long idk which one was the most recent. Something I learned from relationships in general tho is that that aren’t rly my thing. I’m Very Aromantic. 

Religious or spiritual: no but I’m not a Melchior abt it  , 

Favorite color: p u r p l e!!! (i love cool colours in general t h o)

Average hours of sleep: not enough (i haven’t slept in like 40 hrs im actually dozing off rn t b h) Lucky number: idk maybe three?? just because I like to list things in threes, send emojis in threes, etc. 

Tagging:  @awfulllyadorable @conspiracymoritz @jc-ramirez @musiclovely54 @nifty-skeleton @phantastic-times @springreturn @gettallmadge @broadwaybabess @sugared–geeks @rainboboy @destroywhore @cryptidcorvids @broadwaywestand @deafwestnewsies @crutchierilow @hvnschen

Olde Towne road

They meant go find mine

Us, ours. We stopped them, then he said something wierd, i luv u man but not in a gay way, and your bro did it

So we say what is this. He meant the video. They mean to say they intercept get the money

He says they get hit by Xenomorph, lots

Then we hear this they ain't gonna get me i stay here

He says they compete lk right there

So we hear we threaten to hold them off. We say they compete hard

They say we threaten harder

We went at it for quite a while. They then said what if it we die then

Caring little a sign they wish to fight. Found them at the TRACKS that night the boy under them

Used him to sniff them out they said your vulnerable all the time

We agreed

Not anymore,

We stop them now no more olde Town road... None. Not even thier own. All of it sits overgrown or destroyed and overgrown

We can't let Fedor get it out, he hasn't. We see tons looking he wasn't at the window told not to.

Planes go down

No passengers to be found

No blood.

Very odd but explained, they fought and fought sorta in s. Korea

Only when it was time to move me did I see blood. Must HV grabbed millions

We see why he saw huge crowds then none crowds then none huge blocks of police then nobody.

Harrassment??

No they go away now.

Hundreds of wire window buses. Hundreds he counted 3-500 busses at any time coming and going

No

They appeared

We're gone

Returned, no ppl, then gone

Odd patterns he actually struggled to figure out, they see buses cops and the buses leave they show up again.

White bread too left.

Over and over. Same gig here as there. Stolid USA brats using fag shit and so on as cover, I say cover for them to do what? Find you! Lol

True it's backwards iether way they need to see it works. He says no.

Same here. Haul you off somewhere somehow

Someone. Nit even your cops.

Never see any caravans. Only school buses, huge lines of them from time to time

Huge I mean a hundred or so

No greyhound no trains. No ppl on the school buses.

You drive round me daily, thousands millions eventually. In a caravan to my destination. Most fall off. New cars daily here.

Millions

Mostly different not new. Some are familiar. But mostly different.

Odd tooi found that too Hera says. Nobody comments.

Then I heard they think they do it.

And more. We do it all. We checked then too odd for us.

Some were seen driving around him. Dissappeared, re appeared after near Apollo beach

They saw it. Went in found it. Terminators. The real thing

Thor knew but we didn't, we took it, saved us all. Thor was doing it but it was too complicated. Too hard to track.

We felt great so did he they didn't respect it at all. We felt too odd checked. Too many, eventually may find a hole we moved on iron Man. He got shot, no injury. Iron Man drive to our area, but we may have also triggered the shooting as we started taking hardware they triggered us taking it all, Hades worked it all up and Thor per his ideas not layout.

We then heard this all day all night you can't and won't get away with it. We differed, they fought it by delivering more to us. Felt odd. Checked. They didn't care.

We overload them fired all we had as my husband got curious, bingo not enough firepower, test confirmed, Gabriel in trouble, move the fleets in.

Wefired for a long time it seems three month and nuked tono avail ships in trouble us in jeapordy, clones moreso birthing

The wall.

It works. Holds them out. Helps us think. We felt safe he saw it announced doomsday wmd thoriumnukes

We mobilized

Still. Odd reactions.

Too odd. We find it now or forever hold our peace

Hera

If it exists

Thor