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ricardotomasz · 3 months

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Such is life! Behold, a new Post published on Greater And Grander about The Dancing Rabbit; Derek Carranza

See into my soul, as a new Post has been published on https://greaterandgrander.com/the-dancing-rabbit-derek-carranza/

The Dancing Rabbit; Derek Carranza

Raised in Southern California, Derek attended the Mae West Drama school at age 15, now defunct, where he found representation with Todd Turzo at Encino Talent, an also now defunct agency. Over the course of that year Derek auditioned for big brands like Nike, adidas, Nintendo, Dr. Pepper, and Quaker Oats cereals, to name a few.

Once 18, after deciding acting wasn't for him, Derek attended Cal Poly Pomona, where he obtained a bachelors and Master's degree in Biological Sciences and even taught Human Anatomy there for four years. Always a fan of films and fiction novels, plus with the added experience of thesis writing and teaching, this influenced Derek's attitude toward conveying information, and storytelling.

A few years ago, Derek made the decision to return to the entertainment business, in a different capacity: screenwriter and director.

Since leaving his job as a Professor, Derek has dedicated his time to writing several scripts and making films, which is how Derek got his first work - PEPPERBOX REVOLVER - optioned by producers. During this time, and before, he also worked on several videos for GIER PRODUCTIONS, in many capacities.

Furthermore, Derek is also an alumni for Jimmy Lifton at LIMSLA, where he took part in several productions that have included talent like Viveca A. Fox, Adrian Paul, Joe Montegna, and Nichelle Nichols.

He continued writing other works until eventually making his first feature. The low budget I FEAR NO BEAST, which opened at the IFS film festival to great response. Currently, he's in pre-production on his second feature.

What are you working on now that you’re excited about?

I’m currently working on a few projects, but the one I’m most excited about at the moment is a small contained crime mystery thriller called CAFÉ MONTEVIDEO. This is the one I’m working very hard on to get made at the moment. We’ll see it soon.

Why did you get into the entertainment industry?

For me it started back in 2003 with Kill Bill Vol. I. I was 21. Before that, I was in college, trying to make my way into Dental School, then I went to the theater on the Friday it opened and it was like holy crap! I knew from that point what I wanted to do, which was to make these commercial auteur vehicles that were all written and directed by me. As soon as the picture started, I was in on it. I got it instantly. I knew what Tarantino was trying to do in a way I hadn’t noticed before. He was paying homage to everything he loved and cared for, including himself. Before that, I didn’t think that was a thing. I certainly didn’t think you could make a profession out of directing movies like that. I said, I think I can do my own version of that. I want it to be funny and exciting and tense and engaging. Definitely pay homage, but go entirely my own way. That’s how it started for me. Now, I didn’t necessarily know what my own style would be, I just knew I had to work hard to find it. It took years, but it was worth it.

What was the first project you worked on?

It was an original screenplay I wrote called Pepperbox Revolver. It was a low-budget heist film. I wrote it with the intention of directing it myself, but when I got offered to get it optioned by actual producers, I couldn’t resist. I let it go. Well, I was actually talked out of it, but I didn’t resist much, because I knew I wasn’t ready to do a serious one yet. I was still developing my own signature. In the end, they paid me to rewrite it and optioned it for two years.

How did you find the optioning experience?

I saw many crime films, noirs, westerns, behind the scenes interviews and documentaries and decided that I needed to write something low-budget that had some punch to it. At the time, that was the best idea I could come up with. Thank God I let it go. Now, I look back on it and I realize why. It wasn’t that good. It was primer of who I wanted to be. But, at least it got me noticed.

What were your goals when you started Pepperbox Revolver?

My goals at the beginning, whether I knew how to articulate them or not, were to find my signature style. My personal niche. Define my uniqueness if you will. Even before writing that thing that sold for a lot of money and got recognized. I knew I didn’t want to be like everyone else, that much I did know, even when I tried to. I also wanted to learn and socialize with others who had similar goals in order to learn.

What are your future goals?

At this point, I have several screenplays in several stages of development, including CAFÉ MONTEVIDEO. I would really like to get all of them made, maybe not direct all of them, but certainly putting them in front of an audience. I think this is gonna help direct my original objective within the industry, which is to be that auteur director whose work is seen by lots of people.

What kind of school did you originally go to? And do you regret not going to film school?

I went to a polytechnic school where I majored in Biological Sciences. The plan was to go to Dental School and follow in my dad’s footsteps, but that really wasn’t what I wanted. Then I thought I’d be a teacher, which I eventually did for a few years, then I just decided to stop kidding myself and dove into the entertainment business, which is what I really wanted for myself.

Well, I think people should do what they feel they’re ready for with no pressure. If you want to go to film school and build yourself up, then by all means do that, but if you feel ready to play along with professionals and learn by doing, then I think diving into the industry is the path for you.

What advice would you give to a prospective student who is applying to film school?

Learn all you can, but definitely make your own movies. It never hurts. I did. No one’s gonna make them for you.

I always wanted to write and direct my own films. That’s still the goal.

What difficulties did you encounter in Hollywood?

Well, first of all, this is an industry (entertainment) where you really have to know people. A simple resume won’t do it. Moreover, it’s an industry where no one wants to help you get ahead. And no one wants to pay you for anything. Everyone wants you to help THEM get ahead and pay THEM. I mean, I understand it. Everyone has dreams. We’re all selfish. The challenge is that you have to be persistent and make things happen for yourself. Keeping that energy up. Waiting around for others to help you is a bad way to go about it, I think, here or anywhere. But especially here. If you want something done, you have to really sell yourself along with it.

What did you do for a day job while looking for showbiz work?

I’ve been a teacher, an insurance broker, a busser, a courier, a waiter, cashier. I’ve had lots of day jobs.

When did you decide to stop working for free?

As soon I got my first work optioned. That script wasn’t even that good, yet someone was willing to pay me for it. Why would I go back to doing free work? My writing would only get better, I thought.

So far all the scripts I’ve written have been on spec. It’s the only way I know I can write exactly what I want. But hey, look, I’m not opposed to working on assignment, it’s just that if you’re not into the project you’re writing or the direction it’s going, or the people with whom you’re doing business, then why get involved? Money only provides so much motivation.

I’m currently working on CAFÉ MONTEVIDEO. This is a confined crime thriller with elements of mystery, suspense, romance, character study and comedy. By confined I mean that it all takes place in a steakhouse. It’s an odd little duck, but a very entertaining one that I think is far above average. I think this is exactly what I always wanted to make with my first optioned work - Pepperbox Revolver - it’s just that I didn’t know enough and wasn’t refined enough as a writer at that point. I mean, it’s a completely different story and has completely different characters, but the energy of what I wanted drove it, I think. It’s an idiosyncratic signature piece that exemplifies everything I like about movies and then some, plus it’s probably the first purest creation that I wrote. Everything I’ve written after that has been more enjoyable to find.

What are the biggest mistakes a person can make when they first start working in the industry?

I think not improving and being lazy are the two biggest errors people make when they “break in.” Resting on your laurels is unfortunately how many people in the business fade away never recover. Look, if you make it in, that’s great, but then something else has to keep you there. Consistency in your work is a must. So overtime if you don’t learn or collaborate with other talented people, I think you’re shutting yourself off and won’t go beyond a certain point. Always learn how to do it better, keep entertaining people and avoid doing what you don’t want to do.

What’s the biggest thing you depend on, on set?

(laughs)

You mean besides the equipment and the script? Well, I don’t really have a thing I depend on, like a personal thing. No. Well, maybe my sense of humor. That definitely gets me through the day, always. I like making people laugh. That also comes through in my work, I think.

Did someone ever try to take advantage of your inexperience in Hollywood?

Yes. There was one work I got optioned a while back where one of the producers wasn’t fully aware of the terms of our contract and tried pushing me down over the phone when I asked for my option money. He was yelling and insulting. I told him to settle down, then when he wouldn’t I just swore at him, quit and ended the call. I was done and I meant it. About an hour later the other producer called and patched things up with me and got me paid.

Did you ever pay for a program that promised big results to help further your career, but it never delivered?

I once paid a line producer to make me a schedule and budget for $600.00 and he did a very poor job, so I fired him, then hired someone else [at Greater & Grander] who charged me less and did a way better job.

Did you ever come across a project or a person that looked promising, and then the whole thing blew up in your face?

A couple times. Mainly the one I just mentioned. That was the worst. The telling signs are when they seem standoffish or you feel you’re not welcome by them on the project; they won’t tell you certain things. They’re not friendly. It’s all in the energy that they project. In that case, from the very beginning I felt unwelcome. They thought of me as “just the writer.” It was all in how they dealt with me.

What did you do?

When he insulted me. That was the last straw. I quit. I meant it. It wasn’t a ploy, a game or a bit for me. When they called me back and ended up giving me what I wanted, I learned a lot.

Did anyone ever approach you and say they would offer you a job if you slept with them?

No, nothing like that. And I’m a little insulted, to be honest. (laugh) No, I’m kidding.

The BEST part of my job is finishing a project or getting it made. Even while you’re on set getting it made. It feels like you’re actually accomplishing something. It’s tangible. The worst part is when you’re gathering all the elements together; the writing of the script, the gathering of funds, the talent referrals, etc. It’s a lot of work.

Did you ever embarrass yourself in a job interview?

As a P.A. on a show I did once. I took a nap after my duties were done. That was not seen well. They still invited me back the next day to work though, so it all worked out.

Did you ever meet someone casually at a club that wound up leading to a great job, or a major step in your career?

Never at a club, but definitely online and on other sets. I met a few great people online which turned out to be people I’m collaborating with on Café Montevideo. One of them I met on a set that I was a part of a long time ago. Also, my first script option was done through people I met online.

How would you advise people to network?

Wherever you meet like-minded people, be sure to keep their contact information and reach out when you need them. Don’t be embarrassed to call and say hi even once in a while if nothing’s going on and definitely try to elicit other contacts from them that might be of use to you. Make sure it’s synergistic, too. You might have something THEY want.

If you had it to do over again, what would you do differently?

I would’ve started doing this when I was a teenager instead of at 30. (laugh) The quicker the better.

What motto do you try to live your life by?

A motto? I don’t really have a motto. Well, maybe something cheesy like:

LIVE AND LET LIVE. (laugh) There is something I do live by though, which is: be cordial and polite, but don’t just make friends with anyone. Not everyone’s friendship or acquaintance can lead to something. You also have to learn how to read people’s energy quickly. If it matches yours, then it could lead to something fruitful. If you spend too much time being casual, you’ll never go your own way or reach what you want. Things are earned, not given.

Where’s your favorite place in Los Angeles?

Definitely going to the New Beverly Cinema or the Aero Theater in Santa Monica. I just love seeing films on 35mm, they way, I think, they were intended to be seen.

Where can people find you and your work online?

You can go to my youtube page online at Oranje Pictures. It’s spelled with a J, not a G. Or type in Derek Carranza. You’ll see my work there. Or go to filmfreeway.com. All my work is on there, too.

Do you have your own thoughts? Let us know in the comments! Or join our community of successful creators on Patreon!

#CAFÉMONTEVIDEO, #Celebrity, #DancingRabbit, #DerekCarranza, #Interview

#CAFÉ MONTEVIDEO #Celebrity #Dancing Rabbit #Derek Carranza #Interview

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anchoviesinthenightsky · 3 years

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Bruh paranorman having this cool ass jock be openly gay (even for the last few minutes) definitely was a highlight. Usually when it comes to mlm they’re never cool jocks. They’re always angry meld or violent guys, or they’re very effeminate, it’s nice to see a himbo.

(Nothing personal to mlm like this, I was just happy to see people like that like me)

yeah totally! I think the way Paranorman handled having a mlm character was really interesting, and I think also very much reminiscent of 2012.

Like, not to talk about recent queer history, but this movie came out 3 years before gay marriage was legalized in the US. And having queer characters was not a... super common thing? and when there were queer characters they were often stereotyped, made into villains, or their story centered around a type of queerness that benefited their straight counterparts (think like: the gay best friend trope). There weren't a lot of stories where queer people just got to like... exist and not be defined with their queerness.

And I think that's the angle Paranorman took. The directors/writers had this queer character that they knew most audience members would assume was straight (bc heteronormativity, and also the fact that they have a straight female character flirting with him for most of the movie), and they let the character just be who himself, let the audience like him for him, and then reveal he's queer at the end of the movie. It was almost like a "well you liked this character before he had a boyfriend, so that fact really shouldn't change your opinion of him." kind of vibe. Which was not a far cry from the type of humanizing representation a lot of queer people wanted to see at the time.

I feel like queer representation in media is super different now, and a move like that in a film would be seen as... underwhelming. But younger me definitely felt like it was a big deal when I first watched this movie in high school.

That was kind of a tangent from what you were saying, but I do really like how they choose to portray him too. I think himbo is the perfect way to describe him. Some other aspects of his character that I really like-- how much he cares for his brother but also accepts his brother's choices (he warns Neil against being Norman's friend, because Norman doesn't have a great social reputation, and Neil already gets bullied. And when Neil affirms that he wants to be friends with Norman, Mitch doesn't push him on it.), he's also surprisingly down to go on a hunt in the woods to try to find his brother's friend (when they've only been friends for one day). Like he's got all the qualities of a himbo: strong, not that smart, cares a lot about the people around him.

#bullied for a thing you're born with #ask box #mitch truly is head empty heart full #paranorman #also i feel like paranorman could make for a really interesting essay on sexuality #because you actually see other character's sexuality shown more explicitly than Mitch's. Courtney is seen frequently talking about boys #and then flirting and touching Mitch #you have Alvin talking about trying to get on dates with girls and touching Courtney's ass (which is not great obvs)#and you also have Neil pausing a yoga video to look at a woman's butt #the only characters who don't have those types of conversations/ scenes are Mitch and Norman #Mitch gets that one line at the end #and Norman doesn't really get any indicator of sexuality #/plus/ you have the whole plot of like that Norman goes through #and that whole thing very much reads as a metaphor for queerness

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tcm · 3 years

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Reframing Films of the Past: An Interview with TCM Writers

All month long in March, TCM will be taking a look at a number of beloved classic films that have stood the test of time, but when viewed by contemporary standards, certain aspects of these films are troubling and problematic. During TCM’s Reframed: Classics in the Rearview Mirror programming, all five TCM hosts will appear on the network to discuss these issues, their historical and cultural context and how we can keep the legacy of great films alive for future generations.

Also joining in on this conversation are four TCM writers who were open enough to share their thoughts on their love of classic movies and watching troubling images of the past. Special thanks to Theresa Brown, Constance Cherise, Susan King and Kim Luperi for taking part in this conversation. Continue the conversation over on TCM’s Twitter.

What do you say to people who don’t like classics because they’re racist and sexist?

KL: There are positive representations in classic Hollywood that I think would blow some peoples’ minds. I always love introducing people to new titles that challenge expectations.

That said, anyone who broadly slaps a sexist or racist label on a large part of the medium’s history does a disservice to cinema and themselves. That mindset keeps them ignorant not only of some excellent movies and groundbreaking innovation but history itself.

I think people need to remember that movies are a product of their time and they can reflect the society they were made into a variety of degrees - good, bad, politically, culturally, socially. That’s not to excuse racism or sexism; it needs to be recognized and called out as such for us to contend with it today. But it’s important for people who say they don’t like classics for those reasons to understand the historical context. In particular, we need to acknowledge that society has evolved - and what was deemed socially acceptable at times has, too, even if sexism and racism are always wrong - and we are applying a modern lens to these films that come with the benefit of decades worth of activism, growth and education.

SK: I totally agree K.L. For years I have been encouraging people to watch vintage movies who keep proclaiming they don’t like black-and-white films or silent films. For every Birth of a Nation (1915) there are beautiful dramas, wonderful comedies and delicious mysteries and film noirs.

These films that have racist and sexist elements shouldn’t be collectively swept under the rug, because as K.L. stated they shine a light on what society was like – both good and bad.

CC: First off, fellow writers may I say, I think your work is amazing. I'm continually learning from the talent that is here, and I am humbled to be a part of this particular company. Similar to the prior answers, for every racist/sexist film the opposite exists. Personally, classic musicals attracted me due to their visual assault, creativity and their unmistakable triple-threat performances. While we cannot ignore racist stereotypes and sexism, there are films that simply are "fantasies of art." There is also a review of evolution. In 20 years, what we now deem as acceptable behavior/conversation will be thought of as outdated and will also require being put into "historical context." What we collectively said/thought/did 20 years ago, we are currently either re-adjusting or reckoning with now, and that is a truth of life that will never change. We will always evolve.

TB: I would say to them they should consider the times the movie was made in. It was a whole different mindset back then.

Are there movies that you love but are hesitant to recommend to others because of problematic elements in them? If so, which movies?

TB: Yes, there are movies I’m hesitant to recommend. The big one, off the top of my head, would be Gone With the Wind (1939). The whole slavery thing is a bit of a sticky wicket for people, especially Black folks. Me, I love the movie. It is truly a monumental feat of filmmaking for 1939. I’m not saying I’m happy with the depiction of African Americans in that film. I recognize the issues. But when I look at a classic film, I suppose I find I have to compartmentalize things. I tend to gravitate on the humanity of a character I can relate to.

KL: Synthetic Sin (1929), a long thought lost film, was found in the 2010s, and I saw it at Cinecon a few years ago. As a Colleen Moore fan, I thoroughly enjoyed most of it, but it contains a scene of her performing in blackface that doesn’t add anything to the plot. That decision brings the movie down in my memory, which is why I have trouble recommending it.

Also Smarty (1934), starring Warren William and Joan Blondell, is another movie I don’t recommend because it’s basically about spousal abuse played for comedy, and it did not age well for that reason.

SK: Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961): Audrey Hepburn is my favorite actress and I love her Oscar-nominated performance as Holly. I adore Orangy as Cat, as well as George Peppard and Buddy Ebsen, who is wonderfully endearing. And of course, “Moon River” makes me cry whenever I hear it. But then I cringe and am practically nauseous every time Mickey Rooney pops up on screen with his disgusting stereotypical performance as Holly’s Japanese landlord Mr. Yunioshi. What was director Blake Edwards thinking casting him in this part? Perhaps because he’s such a caricature no Japanese actor wanted to play him, so he cast Rooney with whom he had worked within the 1950s.

CC: I cannot necessarily state that I am in "love," but, a film that comes to mind would be Anna and the King of Siam (1946). It is an absolutely beautiful visual film. However, Rex Harrison as King Mongkut requires some explanation.

Holiday Inn (1942), and the Abraham number...why??? Might I also add, there were many jaw-dropping, racist cartoons.

How did you learn to deal with the negative images of the past?

KL: I often look at it as a learning experience. Negative images can provoke much-needed conversation (internally or with others) and for me, they often prompt my education in an area that I wasn’t well versed in. For instance, blackface is featured in some classic films, and its history is something I never knew much about. That said, seeing its use in movies prompted me to do some research, which led me first to TCM’s short documentary about blackface and Hollywood. I love how TCM strives to provide context and seeks to educate viewers on uncomfortable, contentious subjects so we can appreciate classic films while still acknowledging and understanding the history and the harmful stereotypes some perpetuated.

SK: It’s also been a learning experience for me. Though I started watching movies as a little girl in the late 1950s, thanks to TCM and Warner Archive I realized that a lot of films were taken out of circulation because of racist elements. TCM has not only screened a lot of these films but they have accompanied the movies with conversations exploring the stereotypes in the films.

CC: As a Black woman, negative images of the past continue to be a lesson on how Blacks, as well as other minorities, were seen (and in some cases still are seen) through an accepted mainstream American lens. On one hand, it's true, during the depiction of these films the majority of Black Americans were truly relegated to servant roles, so it stands to reason that depictions of Black America would be within the same vein. What is triggering to me, are demeaning roles, and the constant exaggeration of the slow-minded stereotype, blackface. When you look at the glass ceiling that minority performers faced from those in power, the need for suppression and domination is transparent because art can be a powerful agent of change. I dealt with the negative images of the past by knowing and understanding that the depiction being given to me was someone else's narrative, of who they thought I was, not who I actually am.

TB: I’m not sure HOW I learned to deal with negative images. Again, I think it might go back to me compartmentalizing.

I don’t know if this is right or wrong…but I’ve always found myself identifying with the leads and their struggles. As a human being, I can certainly identify with losing a romantic partner, money troubles, losing a job…no matter the ethnicity.

In what ways have we evolved from the movies of the classic era?

KL: I think we are more socially and culturally conscious now when it comes to stories, diversity and representation on screen and behind the scenes, which is a step forward. That said, while there's been growth, there's still much work to be done.

SK: I think this year’s crop of awards contenders show how things have evolved with Da 5 Bloods, Soul, One Night in Miami, Minari, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, The United States Vs. Billie Holiday, Judas and the Black Messiah and MLK/FBI.

But we still have a long way to go. I’d love to see more Native American representation in feature films; more Asian-American and Latino stories.

CC: There are minority artists, writers, producers, directors, actors with the increasing capacity to create through their own authentic voice, thereby affecting the world, and a measurable amount of them are women! Generally speaking, filmmakers (usually male) have held the voice of the minority narrative as well as the female narrative. I agree with both writers above in the thought that it is progress, and I also agree, more stories of diversified races are needed.

TB: One important way we've evolved from the movies made in the classic era by being more inclusive in casting.

Are there any deal-breakers for you when watching a movie, regardless of the era, that make it hard to watch?

KL: Physical violence in romantic relationships that's played as comedy is pretty much a dealbreaker for me. I mentioned above that I don't recommend Smarty (1934) to people, because when I finally watched it recently, it. was. tough. The way their abuse was painted as part of their relationship just didn’t sit well with me.

SK: Extreme racist elements and just as KL states physical violence.

Regarding extreme racist elements, D.W. Griffith’s Birth of a Nation (1915) is just too horrific to watch. I was sickened when I saw it when I was in grad school at USC 44 years ago and it’s only gotten worse. And then there’s also Wonder Bar (1934), the pre-code Al Jolson movie that features the Busby Berkeley black minstrel number “Goin’ to Heaven on a Mule.” Disgusting.

I also agree with KL about physical violence in comedies and even dramas. I recently revisited Private Lives (1931) with Norma Shearer and Robert Montgomery based on Noel Coward’s hit play. I have fond memories of seeing Maggie Smith in person in the play when I was 20 in the play and less than fond memories of watching Joan Collins destroying Coward’s bon mots.

But watching the movie again, you realized just how physically violent Amanda and Elyot’s relationship is-they are always talking about committing physical violence-”we were like two violent acids bubbling about in a nasty little matrimonial battle”; “certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs”-or constantly screaming and throwing things.

There is nothing funny or romantic about this.

KL: I try to put Birth of a Nation out of my mind, but S.K. did remind me of it again, and movies featuring extreme racism at their core like that are also dealbreakers; I totally agree with her assessment. I understand the technological achievements, but I think in the long run, especially in how it helped revive the KKK, the social harm that film brought about outdoes its cinematic innovations.

CC: Like S.K., Wonder Bar immediately came to mind. Excessive acts of violence, such as in the film Natural Born Killers (1994). I walked out of the theatre while the film was still playing. I expected violence, but the gratuitousness was just too much for me. I also have an issue with physical abuse, towards women and children. This is not to say I would not feel the same way about a man. However, when males are involved, it tends to be a fight, an exchange of physical energy, generally speaking, when we see physical abuse it is perpetuated towards women and children.

TB: I have a couple of moments that pinch my heart when I watch a movie. It doesn’t mean I won’t watch the movie. It just means I roll my eyes…verrrrry hard.

-Blackface…that’s a little rough; especially when the time period OF the movie is the ‘30s or ‘40s film.

-Not giving the Black actors a real name to be called by in the film (Snowflake…Belvedere…Lightnin’). I mean, can’t they have a regular name like Debbie or Bob?

-When the actor can’t do the simplest of tasks, i.e. Butterfly McQueen answering the phone in Mildred Pierce (1945) and not knowing which end to speak into. What up with that?

Are there elements they got right that we still haven’t caught up to?

KL: I don't know if the pre-Code era got sex right (and sensationalism was definitely something studios were going for) but in some ways, I feel that subject was treated as somewhat more accepted and natural back then. Of course, what was shown onscreen in the classic era was nowhere near the extent it is today, but the way the Production Code put a lid on sex (in addition to many other factors) once again made it into more of a taboo topic than it is or should be.

One thing I particularly hate in modern movies is gratuitous violence, and it perplexes and angers me how America weighs violence vs. sex in general through the modern ratings system: films are more likely to get a pass with violence, mostly landing in PG-13 territory and thus making them more socially acceptable, while sex, something natural, is shunned with strictly R ratings. Obviously, there are limits for both, but I think the general thinking there is backwards today.

CC: The elegance, the sophistication, the precision, the dialogue, the intelligence, the wit. The fashion! The layering of craftsmanship. We aren't fans of these films for fleeting reasons, we are fans because of their timeless qualities.

I'm going to sound like a sentimental sap here, ladies get ready. I think they got the institution of family right. Yes, I do lean towards MGM films, so I am coloring my opinion from that perspective. Even if a person hasn't experienced what would have been considered a "traditional family" there is something to be said about witnessing that example. Perhaps not so much of a father and a mother, but to witness a balanced, functioning, loving relationship. What it "looks like" when a father/mother/brother/sister etc. genuinely loves another family member.

I was part of the latch-key generation, and although my parents remained together, many of my friends' parents were divorced. Most won't admit it, but by the reaction to the documentary [Won't You Be My Neighbor?, 2018], the bulk of them went home, sat in front of the TV and watched Mr. Rogers tell them how special they were because their parents certainly were not. We don't know what can "be" unless we see it.

#Reframed #TCM #Turner Classic Movies #representation #racism #sexism #inclusion #diversity #cinephile #film #old Hollywood #Theresa Brown #Kim Luperi #Susan King #Constance Cherise

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twh-news · 3 years

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Kevin Feige Breaks Down the MCU's Phase 4 So Far: WandaVision, Falcon, Loki, and Black Widow | Rotten Tomatoes

The Loki Team has taken “the TVA conceit that we’ve loved so much and turned it into an entirely different way of looking at the MCU and looking at the timeline of the MCU.”

“I think everything we do, I hope, are building blocks towards the bigger MCU while actually just being entertaining pieces of art in and of themselves. The Loki series explores an organization from the comics that we’ve been obsessed with for years at Marvel Studios called the Time Variance Authority. And honestly, 15, 20 years ago [we were] going, ‘This is a great idea. I wonder if we could ever do something with this…’

Honestly, [we were] thinking it was a pipe dream that would never come to fruition. (But Avengers was a pipe dream 20 years ago.) And now that we have this series, our producer Kevin Wright and our director Kate Herron and our head writer Michael Waldron and executive producer Stephen Broussard have taken the TVA conceit that we’ve loved so much and turned it into an entirely different way of looking at the MCU and looking at the timeline of the MCU.

And yes, the potential of alternate realities that we’ve heard whispers of from the Ancient One and from other characters in a few of our movies [is there], but [we’re] actually being able to explore it and try to understand it in, again, a rather subversive way – in a very bureaucratic organization that may or may not be telling the truth about the way things work. The title character also being someone who you shouldn’t necessarily take at face value, and is perhaps the most famous trickster that there is.”

“Tom can take that enthusiasm with his immense amount of talent and really rally a crew behind him as well, which is what he did on that show.”

“Tom [Hiddleston] is as great an actor as they come. He’s as charismatic a person as there is, but he also honestly loves that he’s been given this chance, from the moment we hired him with Ken Branagh on the first Thor film to the response that episode three [of Loki] got the other week when it debuted on Disney+. Tom is just as enthusiastic from that first call to each episode of Loki coming out. And that is so important. I think all of us at Marvel Studios try to maintain that enthusiasm and acknowledgement and humility of how lucky we are to be in this position. Tom can take that with his immense amount of talent and really rally a crew behind him as well, which is what he did on that show.

One of the other things that’s personally so exciting about continuing a franchise for this long is getting to evolve your relationship with the cast. Tom started as an actor that Ken Branagh knew who – as people may know – famously auditioned not for Loki, but for Thor, and then felt very thankful to get this job as Loki. I now find myself thankful that he said yes and that he is an executive producer on this Loki series and is helping us make the series what it is. Relationships evolving over the years is one of the other great pleasures of working with spectacular talents like that. And that’s true on films like Black Widow, which Scarlett Johansson was a producer on with us as well, and all of the Disney+ series.”

On Loki’s Bisexuality: “Representation is important across the board and the comics chart the path.”

“Representation is important across the board, and the comics charts the path in almost all ways for what we do in the MCU. And in the comics there are many LGBTQ characters and we want to showcase that on the screen as well. We want to bring those characters to life on the screen. As Stan Lee used to say, ‘Marvel represents the world outside your window.’ And outside of our window there are all different types of people in all different types of places with all different types of preferences and we want that reflected in the MCU and in our fictional world as it is in our real world. So it is of utmost importance that when people go in and see one of our films, or log on to Disney+ and watch one of our series, that it represents the true world outside their window when it comes to the types of people portraying the heroes and the characters in our world.”

#loki #loki series #kevin feige #tom hiddleston #interview #article #rotten tomatoes #long post

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blasphemous-tiefling · 3 years

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I think part of the reason why there’s so much discord in the MCU fandom has something to do with the varying directors for TFA, The Avengers, Winter Soldier, AOU, Civil War, Infinity War, and Endgame. And really, the backbone of the issue is how the different directors and how the audience interprets Steve’s character. Strap in. Because this is a long rant on a topic that normal people really don’t care about.

Joe Johnston created a Steve Rogers that was eager, begging to go to war. I absolutely adored the line in AOU when Steve says, “What kind of monster would let a German scientist experiment on them to protect their country?” Because I feel that sums up Steve in TFA pretty well. He’s anti-bully. He wants to fight. But his whole life he’s been put down, stomped on. Steve repeatedly enlisting is both selfish and selfless. His conversation with Bucky in TFA is a great example of this. Steve says, “There are men laying down their lives. I got no right to do any less than them. That’s what you don’t understand. This isn’t about me.” And Bucky says, “Right. Because you’ve got nothing to prove.” And that’s it. Yes, Steve wants to fight because he’s always been bullied and doesn’t want anyone else to feel that way. Yes, Steve wants to fight because he wants to defend his country. But also Steve wants to fight because no one has ever given him a chance. Steve wants to fight because he wants his life to mean something. Steve wants to die in battle because he thinks it’s honorable. He wants to prove himself. Steve wants it so desperately for both selfless and selfish reasons, which is why he was so willing to take the serum despite the fact that Erskine told him about past failures. There’s even a certain selfishness to his sacrifice at the end of TFA. Many stories that involve sacrifice ride the line of selfishness and selflessness. By sacrificing himself, you could argue Steve is taking “the easy way out.” He’s distraught over Bucky’s death. He’s won the battle he’s been fighting since getting the super soldier serum. By sacrificing himself, Steve can effectively end the troubles caused by the Tesseract and leave without dealing with the consequences of his sacrifice. This point is a bit of a stretch, and not something that I personally agree with, but the thought it there.

Joss Whedon takes that selflessness and turns it into irrefutable righteousness, and it’s disgusting. Steve has a few goofy lines in The Avengers and AOU that I’ll laugh at, but ultimately, everything he does seems so out of character for him. His constant nagging and arguing with Tony is so unnecessary and doesn’t build friendship. His desire to do everything S.H.I.E.L.D. tells him to do is completely incorrect because Steve went against the military and broke the 107th out of the Hydra facility without permission and repeatedly did whatever he wanted without asking. His incessant need to have all the Avengers do as he says is totalitarian and unbearable to watch. Truthfully, this is where I think people misunderstand Steve the most because not everyone watches every solo movie. The Avengers movies are the biggies that most people won’t miss. So general audiences only see this righteous, dictator Steve Rogers and that really pisses me off.

This is one of the only times you’ll hear me praise the Russos, so get ready- Thank goodness Winter Soldier and Civil War follow Joe Johnston’s characterization of Steve. They even dig into his selfishness and rebellious streak, which I adore. Steve isn’t one to just blindly follow orders. Hello? Does “not a perfect solider but a good man” ring any bells? Perfect soldiers follow orders. Good men fight for what’s right even when the world is telling them not to. That’s who Steve Rogers is. What I adore about Winter Soldier so much is that we see Steve attempting to be this perfect soldier, but it’s just not sitting well with him. Something is fishy and weird. He talks to Peggy about her life. She says her only regret is that Steve didn’t get to live his. Steve talks to Sam about possibly getting out of government work. Sam is that representation for Steve- having a hard time finding out why he’s really in it to begin with. The entire film is about Steve going against the government, military, and S.H.I.E.L.D. with both selfish and selfless desires. He knows he needs to do something because Hydra is growing in S.H.I.E.L.D. but he also doesn’t want anything to do with it anyway, so why not tear it all down? Once Bucky is revealed as the Winter Soldier, Steve puts his life on the line to try to get him back. It’s selfish really. When Steve takes off his helmet and drops his shield, he made the decision to die because he wasn’t gonna continue to live without Bucky. Despite the fact that Steve made friends with Natasha and Sam, he didn’t care. All that mattered to him in that moment was James Bucky Barnes. This is very reminiscent of TFA when Steve breaks Bucky out of the Hydra lab. As the world’s only successful super soldier, Steve could’ve been very valuable to the American government and military. He was even doing mild good by helping sell bonds. But that didn’t matter. His country and his military was no longer priority number one. When it comes to Steve Rogers, nothing and no one means more to him than Bucky. Steve and Sam’s conversation that I previously mentioned also parallels this. After Sam lost Riley, he didn’t want to be in the military anymore. He said he felt like he was up there just to watch, nothing he could do. This is a direct parallel to how Steve feels about Bucky.

Civil War, while a trash movie, sticks with Steve’s selfish yet selfless motivations. “What if this panel sends us somewhere we don’t think we should go? What if there is somewhere we need to go and they don’t let us?” Not wanting to surrender his right to choose is Steve Rogers. He just put down S.H.I.E.L.D.- an organization that was giving him demands. Why would he sign his life away to the American government again? Corporations can be run by greed and corruption- something Steve doesn’t want the world to be full of but also something he doesn’t want his world to be ruled by. When Bucky is framed for killing King T’Chaka, Steve knows the Accords will bring Bucky in and possibly execute him. He can’t let that happen. And he asks Natasha not to get in his way because he doesn’t want anyone else to get hurt. He knows how dangerous Bucky can be, but he doesn’t want Bucky or anyone else getting hurt or in trouble due to this sticky Accords situation. Both selfish and selfless. I don’t even want to get into later in the film, but I guess I will. Guys, there’s no world, no universe, no place in time that Steve wouldn’t try to stop Zemo. Tony never even gave him the chance to explain himself. It was either, “Come with us or we fight.” Steve gathered that team together- not to fight Tony but to fight Zemo. It was never his intention to fight with Tony. He was just trying to stop Zemo. Now, when Tony learns about his parents’ death, anger is a valid emotion. Physically fighting and attacking Steve and Bucky to the point of death? Not valid or even remotely reasonable. It makes no sense as to why Tony would be that angry at Bucky- someone who was tortured and brainwashed to do what he did. Steve had his reasons for not telling Tony considering that when it comes to Steve Rogers, nothing and no one means more to him than Bucky. Of course, Steve was going to hide the truth from Tony in an effort to protect Tony, Bucky, and himself. Selfish yet selfless.

Infinity War gives us the glorious lines of “I’m not looking for forgiveness. And I’m way past asking permission. Earth just lost her best defender. So we’re here to fight. And if you wanna stand in our way, we’ll fight you too.” and “We don’t trade lives.” These lines beautifully sum up Steve’s rebelliousness and need to fight while also not risking others’ lives. He’ll always risk himself first. There’s not much to say about this film considering it’s mostly action and Steve shares the screen with just about every other superhero, so we’re not given a lot of time. But overall, the Russos kept that same Steve Rogers.

And then Endgame does a complete 180 and decides to serve us Joss Whedon’s Steve with a conservative, pro-military, unbelievably illogical twist. Steve’s obsession with Peggy in this film is so out of place. She would’ve died seven years prior in the MCU. Steve’s been living in the present with Natasha, Sam, Bucky, Wanda, Vision, and T’Challa. That was his family. He lost Sam, Bucky, Wanda, Vision, and T’Challa in the Infinity War. It only makes sense that he would be fighting for them in Endgame. Yet he’s not. We’re beat over the head about how much he misses Peggy and it’s so unbelievably weird. Steve is never allowed to mourn Sam and Bucky specifically despite the fact that they were his number one companions. He never mentions them. Never has a touching reunion with Bucky. Barely has any reaction to Natasha’s death. It’s disgusting honestly. This is not “I will fight to my death for the people I love” Steve Rogers. And the ending is the most pathetic of all. There’s no world, no universe, no place in time that Steve would willingly go almost a hundred years away from Bucky and Sam, somewhere he wouldn’t fight for others. “Pretending you could live without a war.” I mean, come on. He’s Steven Grant Rogers. It’s disgusting to paint him as this man who would throw away his friendships and a world that is being bullied all for some girl he kissed once and barely knew. No. No, no. Not my Steve Rogers.

I give the directors a little too much crap. I’m fully aware that a whole team of people make these movies, but you can’t deny that Steve changes from movie to movie depending on the director. Endgame is the exception in which the directors were the same, yet they diverged completely from their original interpretation of the character. I’ve heard people say that it had to be an anti-gay agenda- that ending Steve’s story with Bucky would’ve been too gay even if they weren’t romantically involved, but I still think that’s pathetic. Honestly, I would’ve rather seen Steve die than have his character trashed and pooped on like this. From a narrative perspective, what happened in Endgame is not okay. Marvel Studios’ treatment towards “sideline” characters like Natasha, Rhodey, Sam, and Bucky- particularly in Infinity War and Endgame- is not okay. Yeah, I’m aware I get too heated over this fictional universe. But the characters are the only reason I stick around. The stories are lackluster for me. I’ve never been one to watch movies for action sequences. But I’ve always been in love with Steve Rogers as a character- complicatedly riding the line of selflessness and selfishness, dedicating himself wholeheartedly to a cause and to the people he loves. When in the end that character was completely scrapped and shredded in the garbage disposal like crust on bread or the skin of an apple, I’m gonna be angry for a long time.

#why throw away steve’s character?#sorry but I’m just not over any of it #anti endgame #mcu #marvel #steve rogers #captain america #the first avenger #winter soldier #civil war #I’ve seen every marvel property #but I hate #marvel studios #rant #honestly this rant was just for me #may delete later

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nikaidou-stan · 3 years

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MY THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING THE SANGATSU NO LION LIVE ACTION PT. 1

⚠️SPOILERS BELOW!!!⚠️ (also super long post warning?? i have a lot of thoughts sorry)

- they cremating the bodies in front of the whole family???? japanese people mad asf

- ACTUAL REPRESENTATION OF HOW A TEENAGER'S APARTMENT WOULD LOOK IF THEY LIVED ALONE IN IT

- i love how in the movie Kiriyama's almost skeletal, like you can see how loose his uniform is

- SO THE SHOGI BUILDING EXISTS IRL??? BITHC IM SHOOK

- ok Kouda's terrible and all but the actor looks so much like him it's almost scary

- Gouto in the anime 🤢 <<<<< Gouto in the live-action 😍

- wtf is up with Smith's hair like 😭 sir this is why Matsumoto chose Akari instead of u

- "even tho u don't have any friends" "I know that already." KIRIYAMA AND HAYASHIDA'S INTERACTIONS ARE SO NICE I LOVE THEM

- "since I'm a minor, I'll have a juice" boy u literally could've chosen anything else but u ordered a fucking juice. perhaps do u want some crayons and some paper too??

- it's almost embarrassing how in my country kids start drinking at like 12 yo but Kiriyama after one shot is literally dying on the concrete

- AKARI IS SO PRETTY AJNSJIFKJN

- NIKAIDOU MY BOY MY MAN MY PAL MY BROSKI I LOVE U

- also screaming in a megaphone in front of the whole school not realizing he's embarrassing his friend? big kinnie moment

- fuck yeah Hina dressing like an actual 15 yo, no more of that dress over jeans shit 🤢

- Gouto's back muscles >>>>

- MISAKI'S A WHOLE ASS MILF DAMN

- "you have great seniors" "we teach him how to get along in the society" SIMPS

- when Kyouko appears at Kiriyama's door in the anime he's like "omfg not this shit again" but in the live-action he's straight-up scared. i wonder if the director was hinting at something...

- ok no they were definitely trying to tell us something; like the body language, how he refuses to look her in the eyes... poetic cinema (but also really sad)

- THE EMOTIONS ARE SO FUCKING RAW IN THIS OMG I'M IN LOVE

- Kyouko Kouda shut the fuck hup challenge

- finally some representation of people who die after running for 50 meters

- I feel like I could enjoy this movie a fuckton more if I wasn't a highly emphatic person and if I knew how to deal with emotions

- shit, the actor who portraits Kiriyama as a child should get every prize there is

- psa that Smith canonically thinks Kiriyama's adorable

- also Akari has definitely a fat fetish like girl what the fuck is this

bestie you live with a middle schooler and a toddler, at least try to hide it

- "you're unexpectedly good looking, for a shogi player" sis you're just mad he's skinny af

- I really feel like they're exaggerating Nikaidou's character, like hurr durr look at him he's funny and he's fat :/ (or maybe I'm just not ready to face the fact that he's not as cute as I expected him to be idk)

- fuck bro I would've obliterated Kiriyama too 😭 we can't really blame Gouto he did what he had to do

- Kuranosuke Sasaki looks so much like Shimada, I love this cast

- but also why do they slam the pieces on the board?? is it their way of t-posing or something?

- Momo really just had to say "stop being mean >:(" and Kyouko shut up, what a queen

- besties the worst thing about this movie is that Nikaidou isn't at least a head shorter than everybody else

- broke: Gouto's drinking water during the match with Shimada bc he's thirsty woke: he's actually drinking vinegar to assert his dominance

- there's so much sexual tension, I'm not even kidding

- 🎵two rivals best friends in a limousine 🕺 they might kiss 😳

- *sees Shigeta at the workshop* I HAVE DIED EVERYDAY WAITING FOR YOU

- the pigeon guy looking kinda hot tho 👉👈

- aww in the movie Shigeta visits Nikaidou at the hospital with Shimada :D

- Nikaidou's voice is so deep and for what 😭 he's like "calm down Kiriyama, 👹 ÇÄLM DÕWN 👹"

- damn

Shigeta's canonically married

- I'm sad, the pigeon guy looks like he's about to cry :(

- ok now I'm the one who's crying, everyone's so proud of Kiriyama 😭

- they couldn't give us Kiriyama's green eyes, they couldn't give us short king Nikaidou, and now Souya's not even albino??? fuck this, I'm out (jk)

- where tf is Raidou????? who's this old dude???

- hell yeah Gouto, put him back in his place

- god if I were in Shimada's place I would have simply unalived myself

- SHIT THE TRAILER FOR THE SECOND PART IS CRAZY ASF WHEN TF DID MOMO GET KIDNAPPED

RATING: 9+/10, I absolutely fucking loved it, BUT:

- they really did my boy Nikaidou dirty, he seemed like a caricature of himself :(

- it took me 5 business days to finish it (ADHD? don't know her)

- overall, WATCH IT

#rei kiriyama #hinata kawamoto #akari kawamoto #momo kawamoto #nikaidou harunobu #kyouko kouda #kai shimada #morio shigeta #masachika kouda #gotou masamune #touji souya #misaki kawamoto #march comes in like a lion #march comes in like a lion memes #sangatsu no lion #sangatsu no lion memes #3 gatsu no lion #3 gatsu no lion memes

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popwasabi · 4 years

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“Who are you?” The scene that defines Chadwick Boseman’s legacy

Yesterday, the world lost a bright and promising, burgeoning talent in Chadwick Boseman.

I had wondered privately for a while if something was wrong with him, as others had as well online, as he appeared increasingly sicker with each interview he gave over the last two years. I thought maybe I had been looking too much into it, not wanting to jump to conclusions about who he was but now gravely we all know why.

The much too young star of films such as “42,” “Marshall,” and of course, “Black Panther” had been fighting a largely private battle with colon cancer for four years.

It was devastating hearing this news yesterday, the man who undeniably left behind a legacy of playing prominent black heroes, both historical and fictional, passed away just as he was starting to truly hit it big. When you begin to realize the man was dealing with cancer as he performed physically demanding roles in the MCU you begin to see the character and determination of a man unwilling to quit in the face of true adversity.

But he clearly wasn’t just doing it for himself when he continued making and promoting NINE more movies despite his diagnosis, afterall no one would’ve blamed the guy for taking it easy these past four years. He’s had many scenes that define his legacy over his all too short career but I feel it can really be summed up in one particular moment from by far his most famous film; “Black Panther.”

Those who know me or have read my work know that I have a fairly cynical relationship with the Marvel Cinematic Universe. While I would not say most of them are “bad” per se, I would say a ton of them are largely interchangeable action comedies with pretty straightforward messages about good vs evil for general audiences. They are largely popcorn escapism and though there is nothing technically wrong with that, I was starved for an MCU film that was sincere about its story finally and had something real to say.

Enter “Black Panther” in early 2018.

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“Black Panther” was everything I had long been waiting for in the MCU; a film with a real sense of vision and theme, a killer soundtrack, great supporting characters, a complicated and nuanced villain, and a story that didn’t feel the need to add a joke after every single scene like more typical MCU movies. The tip of that spear of course was Chadwick, who had already proved to be a great Black Panther in one of the few other sincere Marvel flicks “Civil War.” His natural charisma, physicality, and dramatic presence in this role made him a huge standout in frankly the best ensemble cast of any superhero movie ever.

The scene that truly sums up not just the mark “Black Panther” left on Hollywood but Chadwick’s own legacy comes at the very end though (the first of three, of course. It’s an MCU movie, afterall).

T’Challa has defeated his usurper cousin Erik Killmonger, his rule restored in Wakanda but clearly a changed man from the story’s beginning as he reckons with the complicated legacy of his father. He travels to Oakland, the birthplace of Killmonger, with his sister Shuri who he explains the crime committed by their father in this place and how it set off the events of the story. He turns to Shuri, tells her that he has decided to help this afflicted community by creating a Wakandan outreach center for the youth to give them a new hope in life. As he says this he decloaks their ship nearby, surprising the youth already in the area who are immediately in awe of it. One of the kids turns to T’Challa, smiling, a sense of inspiration and intrigue brewing inside, and asks “Who are you?” to which the young King simply smiles, then the credits roll.

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It’s a simple scene but it truly speaks to the impact left behind by Chadwick and the importance of representation.

“Black Panther” is hardly the first starring vehicle for a black man, it’s not even the first black super hero movie but what it made it different is it was the first blockbuster to truly lean unapologetically into its African identity to focus on the inspiration of a story centered around that culture. It showed Hollywood that an action blockbuster not just centered on a black star but centered on African culture had vast widespread appeal.

White kids will never have a shortage of white superheroes to grow up with on the big screen; a diverse palette of Supermans, Spider-mans, Captain Americas, and shit we’re even getting our sixth new Batman actor since 1989 soon. But Chadwick gave black kids their first real Superman of their own.

In the years since this came out, I have seen the influence, at times, firsthand among the youth. I work part-time as a kids martial arts instructor and each Halloween party we’ve held I’ve seen a few more T’Challas among the costumes represented. When I ask kids, black, white, or Asian, what their favorite superhero is, it always warms my heart to see a kid light up when they say “BLACK PANTHER!”

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(Seriously, cute AF)

This goes beyond just my anecdotal observations of course; the film grossed a billion dollars, and there are countless videos online of kids yelling “Wakanda forever!” at the top of their lungs while rocking a Black Panther suit or reciting one of the movie’s memorable lines. It’s beautiful because it speaks to that last scene’s key message; inspiration.

Growing up myself, as a half Asian American, there weren’t a ton of role models who looked like me to take inspiration from. I didn’t really understand how much this could affect me until I finally did start seeing people like myself occupy positions of influence. I didn’t start caring for baseball until I saw a slugger named Hideki Matsui smash a couple dingers in a Yankees’ uniform in the early 2000s. I didn’t care much for martial arts, outside my very early youth, until I witnessed a half Japanese Brazilian named Lyoto Machida KO Thiago Silva at UFC 94 in 2009. I didn’t care much for soccer until a striker named Keisuke Honda played out of his mind in the early rounds of the 2010 FIFA World Cup.

Sometimes you gotta see something happen in order to believe and be inspired by it and it’s easier to visualize it when you see someone who looks like you do it. That’s what representation means and why it’s important.

It’s easy for white America to dismiss the need for representation in media when theirs is so saturated in the culture everyday. Cries of “wHaT aBoUt wHiTe HiStORy mOnTH?!” delivered unironically while their history is proudly given front seat consideration in all forms of media, film, and influence every day. This is why it drives me so crazy when a white person tells me “representation isn’t important” because apparently, they “don’t need it.”

Well motherfucker, of course you don’t need it. You fucking got yours already!

(What every non-white person wants to say when confronted with this tired, out of touch argument...)

“Black Panther” delivered a superhero that not only black children could be proud of and love but someone they could draw inspiration from. Kids are going to want to become film directors cause of this movie, actors, stuntmen, martial artists, scientists, engineers, and so many other different things that the world of Wakanda proudly showcases and it’s all thanks to Chadwick’s leading man performance that made it possible.

Some jokes I’ve heard frequently on the internet is that Chadwick was on somewhat of a quest to play every major black role in story-telling history, what with performances as Jackie Robinson, Thurgood Marshall, James Brown, and of course Black Panther. But I think his 2018 speech at his Alma Mater of Howard really explains why he kept looking to play these major positive black roles.

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(I encourage you to listen to the whole thing but the part that’s important here begins at 21:55)

Hollywood likes to pigeon hole certain demographics of people (aka non-white) to play stereotypical roles forever until they are proven to be lucrative in different ways (Qualified Immunity of film-making if you will…). Black people largely could mostly play thugs and drug dealers, Latinx can only be gang bosses and poor servants and gardeners, Asians are either kung fu masters or some other offensive perpetual foreigner. And in worst cases no role at all, instead whitewashed for general audiences (aka white folk).

Chadwick took a stand that the color of his skin did not define who Hollywood narrowly believed he could perform as and set out to play characters and people who could inspire a new generation of African Americans and show the rest of the country that they were more than a stereotype.

When that young kid in that final scene asks, “Who are you?” and T’Challa smiles its because he knows he’s already changing hearts and minds for the future, just as Chadwick did playing this truly inspirational role.

“Black Panther” is not a perfect movie. I could discuss the ways it could’ve been better and even, less problematic in parts on a different day, but the legacy it leaves behind is one that’s undeniably positive and Chadwick was able to make that a reality. Perhaps he understood that if the world knew his diagnosis it would blunt the impact of “Black Panther’s” release, that if little kids and African Americans alike knew their superhero was already dying it would mar the film’s positivity and influence. I can’t speak for the dead obviously, and in no way am I saying one should just push through a cancer diagnosis and keep it secret, but I can see Chadwick understanding what it would mean for the audience if they just believed for as long as possible that they would have their king of Wakanda forever.

As Robert Downey Jr. said on social media last night “He leveled the playing field while fighting for his life.”

Though I will never know him personally, by most measures Chadwick seemed to be exactly the kind of hero he showed up to be on the big screen and his legacy will ultimately be that of one who looked to inspire others, particularly the next generation until his final breath. If that doesn’t make him a hero, I don’t know what does.

Rest in power, King. Wakanda Forever…

(Via BossLogic)

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itisa-profoundbond-sarandom · 3 years

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Destiel, Buddie: the great love patterns and one failure.

I'm going to highlight the patterns of baiting and good storytelling. Chim sounds like the Sam to Dean!Buck. Cas!Eddie and Claire/Jack!Chris.

WARNING: not a negative post, this is from a destielshipper!POV looking to something so beautiful like 9-1-1.

As someone pointed out: if Eddie was a girl they would've already get laid. Same thing with Dean if Cas was a girl.

(my gifs)

We know Dean and Buck like to get laid with many girls...and have some homo-joke-scenes with guys.

Dean Winchester being a disaster bi (since S1)

(+ Josh and roomate!Albert - I know someone ships it xD) What I really enjoyed with Buck/Abby is the meaning of the storyline. D (who likes older women also) and B always get the part of having fun, and when it comes to express their feelings, not all their crushes understand their soul and they don't always admit those with themselves.

Abby: I think I was afraid that If I came back, I would become that person again. Because I missed you. I wanted to see you. But I didn’t trust myself.

Buck: Because being there, being with me, you might lose yourself again?

Shannon: I can’t fail him again, or you and I won’t. I’m still learning how to be someone’s mother and after that maybe I can be someone’s wife.

Eddie [to Bobby]: [...] she wanted a divorce. And I’m still mad. How stupid is that? I’m agry at a dead person and at myself because I forgave her for everything, and that wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough.

Buck [to Maddie]: You’re never the one getting left behind. You’re the one who leaves. You don’t know what’s like to watch someone you love walk away.

Dean [to Lisa]: When I do picture myself happy...it’s with you.

Lisa: You've got so much buried in there, and you push it down, and you push it down. Do you honestly think that you can go through life like that and not freak out? Just, what, drink half a fifth a night and you're good? Dean: You knew what you signed up for.

Lisa: Yeah. But I didn't expect Sam to come back. And I'm glad he's okay. I am. But the minute he walked through that door, I knew. It was over. You two have the most unhealthy, tangled-up, crazy thing I've ever seen. And as long as he's in your life, you're never gonna be happy. That came out so much harsher than I meant. Dean: It's not your fault.

Who does understand them? The best friend. Cas and Eddie are the best friends to who they talk to, they can feel judged by but it doesn't really matter (or it DOES); they trust each other and feel safe.

you gave up an entire army for one guy (dean)

thank you, for not giving up

stupid for the right reasons

maybe you could’ve come at it a little differently

The Abby-phase was very important 'cause B wanted to stop to think about just the sex part and really connect with the person, doin' romantic stuff, even VDay; feelings were in the game.

(He literally asked to the firetruck!girl to see her again...but she said no. Ali? She acted like a Lisa.)

B really tried to find someone and always felt left behind. D had two important relationships, one with Cassie (yeah, that's fun) and I liked her -but he couldn't have a black girlfriend, right(?). Always felt left behind, by his father, by his brother, his mother’ memories were a lie.

When we first see Cassie, they didn’t see each other in a very long time and they get a reunion during a case.

Much like Eddie and Shannon.

(not saying also this...but....this)

Lisa and the weird-and-bad-written-originally story with Amara...who knew Dean bc of his 'dark' side. (Amara has found Cas and Dean’s profound connection and Dean was scared by her darkness connected to his anger and loniless).

At one point Amara will find Dean thanks to Cas's heart just my reply to go fast (while Cas was possessed by Lucifer- an annoying bitch who is used as a destiel bait)

We know Buck for his autodiagnosed sex addiction with women and Eddie as a married man with a son and wife not in the picture...and the episode- I'm so sorry, but the beginning of S2 with Buddie can't be described as two hets - there are tropes.

We start to fall for them and Chim with Maddie, wait- Sam!Chim and Eileen!Maddie.

Sam and Eileen’ first episode is basically a blind date on a hunt. They flirt and make a badass duo, she's deaf and super sassy and they're so sweet together. Many start to ship it asap.

I cried with Madney asap.

What does Maddie do since Buck start talking about Chris and Eddie? Yeah.

What does happen in Fanfiction with Sam (he’s a Maddie here) and when Saileen comes back on S15?

Bros shipping their bros with their best friends, mirroring them.

Madney have Buddie patterns.

Saileen is presented as a Het!Destiel parallel...and they can kiss.

Sam asks Dean if he could start thinking about settle down with someone who understand the life, another hunter. Eileen is a hunter. Cas is an angel - the one who raised him from perdition and got lost for his beautiful soul/hunter.

I LOVE that Eddie can be just a friend to Lena and Marjan, basically (I hope not to see this ruined in the future).

Now, over the line: Dean has a mother figure in Bobby!Jody and Jody is shipped with Athena!Donna (also good friend to Dean) and he's got a sister figure in Hen!Charlie.

[Jody, Charlie]

(Jody and Donna have many daugthers figures and a spin-off who hasn't been picked bc too many poc girls, queer girls and two not young women with perfect bodies.)

Bobby!Jody helped him with his mother-plot-fiasco (that was really bad) and I loved Mary before s12.

[I'm having fun thinking about this connections, leave me alone if it'ss just a great big illusion]

I forgive you / of course I forgive you

personal space / personal space

Destiel, uncle!Sam and Jack

Destiel, uncle!Sam and Claire

*love is in the air*

oh and beside the MurphyPatterns (Klaine, Bryan&David) we do have the KripkePatterns also (Timeless, The Boys 2 3 )

One of the most loud BI!Dean eps

I’m ready for some domestic Buddie and Madney

Eileen and Cas back from the dead

Just to make you all laugh after this big movie, remember the chars:

what a destiel scene always looks like

THE END:

Yes, C*W and Fox aren’t the same, and yes producers can make the difference. all SPN writers WEREN’T the problem, directors neither, not to mention the actors.

C*W thrived on Destiel for 12 years, building a very good story that could’ve show two men accepting the love they deserved....but they failed, erasing every other (lgbtq, poc, disable) characters.

Fox doesn’t need more viewers but they WILL gain more of them showing Buddie because representation of a M/M ship with BI/PAN (I see Pan!Eddie) it’s a huge thing for TV and it matters. I always see gay love not many other possibilities, with Murphy mostly, he can make the change again.

A reminder to what C*W did

#destiel #buddie #I just want my couples to be happy

21 notes · View notes

serensama · 4 years

Text

To Release #2

Zen needs to let MC go.

Years ago, I had asked the amazing @promiscuous-jalapeno to write a HC for me when I was too scared to write my own and she did an amazing job- tore me right up it did. I asked her shortly thereafter if she minded if I tried to do it and she was kind enough to encourage me. Nearly 4 years and I’ve finally done it.

Trigger warnings: Character death, mentions of blood and aneurysm.

This is for my friend, my sister- Susana. I don’t know how to let you go. But one day I will. And one day I will see you again. Rest well until then dear one.

This is for my baby, my puppy Meiko- run free my little one. I know you’ll be waiting for me too. Keep Susana company and keep her safe until we catch up, okay? Good Boy.

- It wasn’t a particularly long or difficult day when it happened.

- They were wrapping up the film and just going over the last few scenes that Zen wasn’t thrilled with; ever the perfectionist he didn’t want sub-par acting from him or his co-stars, he loved his fans too much to offer them nothing but the best.

- The director hadn’t called cut but everyone had started to make a commotion on the set and forced the actor to stop and look around. A crowd had congregated near the catering table, someone calling for the onsite doctor for one of the crew who had seemingly fainted.

- The director walked towards the people and when she got close enough to see what or who the cause of the ruckus was, she spun on her heel and screamed out to him.

- Zen turned towards the sound of his name and saw his director calling him over with frenzied hands, urging him to quicken his pace and pointing towards the throng of people- “… It’s MC.”

- The actor had pushed one of his colleagues out of his way, apologising to them in his head as he bounded over to where the director had motioned to. He easily pulled people away to let him through when he finally got to eye of the masses, his MC laying on the floor in a heap. Her arms were thrown askew and her legs in an odd angle, a trickle of blood from where she caught her head against the edge of the table forming a pool of the rich, dark liquid beneath her.

- Zen hissed curses at the idle idiots around him, just standing there slack jawed staring at his girlfriend instead of doing anything else.

- With a gentleness he only ever showed to her, he caressed the inside of her wrist softly careful to not jostle her in case she hurt her neck or back with her fall. “MC, baby, please wake up, let me see those beautiful eyes again,” he cooed, praying his voice was enough to coax her from her unconsciousness. When she furrowed her brow but remained wholly unresponsive, he tried once again, convinced he could reach her. “Come on baby, I know you. You’re probably screaming at yourself for falling and being careless- especially with so much to do. So do it, kick your own ass and wake up. You can do this. Show me how strong you are MC.”

- Her eyelashes began to flutter as she sluggishly began to move.

- Zen exhaled a breath he didn’t know he was holding and a collective sigh of relief was released on set. Everyone knew and loved the ivory haired star but the only thing he was ever pedantic about to a fault was the health and safety of his manager, his girlfriend- his ‘whole world’. He couldn’t care less if all they gave him was warm water for lunch so long as she was well taken care of and comfortable.

- The doctor finally reached them and quickly rushed the remaining stragglers away from the couple, even managing to push Zen back when he said he needed more room to make sure MC was okay, the young man hovering around them, pacing worriedly about the sidelines like a mother hen.

- He watched on as the doctor patched her up, wincing as the thread and needle cinched up the gash- silently threatening the doctor to do a good job and not leave MC with a scar. However the more he thought of a scar on his girl got him a little excited, it would make her look mysterious, dangerous, his every own femme fatale- a physical representation of her inherent bad-assery for all the world to see.

- Zen could feel the tension in his shoulders relax as she slowly stood up and accepted whatever direction the doctor was giving her. He practically sprinted to her side when the older man gestured for him to come over, his long, toned arms carefully gathering her to him and pressing soft kisses to her skin, ignoring the scent of dried blood mingling with her sweet perfume. “… and make sure she doesn’t fall asleep again until you’re at the hospital and she’s in their care. Your blood pressure is pretty low and you’ve looked paler as of late, have you been getting enough iron lately MC?”

“Mhmm.” “Mm. Okay. Well go get those tests and make sure nothing too serious happened with that hit on your head. Make sure you watch out of her Zen,” the doctor instructed with a terse nod before taking his leave.

- A few moments passed with Zen still holding onto MC, lips still against her brow. He wanted to remember what it felt like to hold her and feel her breath against his skin, the warmth of her body, the sting of the pinch at his… the hell?

- Crimson eyes looked down to see MC pinching at his arm.

- “AIR!” she finally managed as she pried herself away from him, her mouth open and gaping for the precious gas to enter her lungs once more. He chuckled as he allowed himself one final self-indulgent kiss on top the crown of her head and stepped back, letting her find her own footing and collect herself.

- “What happened Jagi?” he asked, tucking an errant strand of hair back up into her messier messy bun. “Do you remember anything?”

- MC grimaced as she thought back, trying to remember anything before waking up to a blistering pain in her head and the sounds of hushed whispers all around her, and the large worried eyes of her lover peering down at her. Ignoring the pounding at the base of her skull and the way her world was just slightly off kilter, she focused on the chain of events that led her there.

- She had been looking over his schedule and worrying herself over how to get to one interview to another with only twenty minutes to spare across the city during peak hour traffic when she felt a sharp pain at the back of her eyes, acute and with such intensity she had to put her planner on the table and steady herself and then… nothing.

- Zen frowned not liking what he was hearing. At first he thought that she had neglected herself again, probably forgetting to eat something during the day because she was so fixated on him and his commitments she disregarded her responsibility to herself- it wouldn’t be the first time. Although this time, it felt different. Apart from the fact that he had practically force fed MC lunch with him not two hours earlier, he didn’t like the way she had been acting in the days leading up to this episode. She had been more exhausted than normal, crashing into bed often without having a shower which was something she was loathe to do, always yelling at him for doing it if he stumbled home from the set late at night. She was irritable and short tempered, yes she was a fire cracker and he loved her for it, but he could see she was being snappish for no good reason and that just wasn’t his MC.

- That and his dreams. Dreams he suppressed because they didn’t sit right with him, didn’t make sense, didn’t want to make sense of it. So he didn’t. It didn’t make sense that he would be in the middle of a choreographed number, with MC front row and centre watching him and he would do a turn and then she was gone. Just him alone on the stage, with people waiting for him to continue. It just didn’t make any sense.

- He would focus on what was real and happening in front of him and he would take things one step at a time instead of jumping to conclusions from stress addled dreams. Yes, that was it. It was the stress of this new movie. It was going to be the biggest one to date and with so much riding on his performance, there was no doubt that was what was causing such terrible images to play out before him the minute he closed his eyes.

- “Let’s get you to the hospital okay Jagi?”

- He almost throttled the doctor in the ER. How the hell did he dare say such things. He was going to ask for a second opinion and then a third. He wasn’t going to stop until he heard the right opinion, the only one that mattered. That MC was just fine. MC was going to live- anyone who said otherwise was going to taste the heel of his boot.

- “I know it’s difficult to hear but as it stands it might be best to start making some arrangements just in case-”

“You need to stop talking Doc,” he ground out behind his teeth, both hands squeezing against the metal of MC’s hospital bed. “Zen,” she chided with a disapproving look but with a gentle hand on his arm. “Let him speak.”

He shook his head and crossed his arms in front of him like he was trying to intimidate a better diagnosis out of him instead of the bullshit he was already sprouting.

“Not unless he goes back and does those tests again and comes back with some different results, because those are wrong,” he replied pointing at the chart the doctor held in his hands. To his credit the older man didn’t flinch too badly at Zen’s bullying, probably used to all kinds of bargaining from people in the ER. “As much as I wish they were wrong… they aren’t. I’m afraid there isn’t much else that can be done- what we’ve found is an intracranial aneurysm and at the size it’s managed to get we need to do emergency surgery or it’s at great risk of rupturing. All I’m saying is that the surgery comes with risks- as if it does rupture during the surgery she could have a stroke or receive permanent brain damage and, as such, she should get everything in order in case the worst were to happen-” “What we need you to say Doc is that the surgery is going to save her life and everything will be fine,” he snapped pointing at him menacingly. Zen tapped on the clipboard and then into the doctor’s chest to get his point across.

- The doctor sighed and gave MC a pointed look which she wordlessly responded with a nod, still disoriented from trying to catch up with what the man had just said. “Can you believe that guy? What kind of bed side manner was that? Jumin would be classified as downright cuddly compared to that guy,” Zen bristled, a shiver climbing up his spine as he thought about both men. MC sighed as she grabbed Zen’s hand, squeezing it to steel herself for what was to come. “The last thing you need to hear before impromptu surgery is hey- you’re probably gonna kick the bucket so make sure you know who is going to get your china.” “Jaehee is going to get the China. Saeyoung my shoes,” she grinned, stroking at the smooth skin on the back of his hand absentmindedly. “Yoosung said he wanted my gear from LOLOL, V will have my sketchbook and Jumin all my cat paraphernalia. You can keep my lingerie.”

- MC was giggling until she looked up at Zen’s face, his downturned mouth and sparkling eyes clearly showed a man who was not impressed with the jokes she was telling.

“Zen, Oppa, it’s going to be okay,” she soothed, bringing his forehead to touch hers, rubbing her nose to nuzzle him. “I need you to tell me it’s okay, that we’re going to be okay.”

“You only ever call me Oppa when you want something,” Zen pouted as he returned the action, he took a deep breath in and stilled himself. MC was in his arms and she always would be. “Hey, hey I promise Jagi you are going to be fine. You are going to go in there and that aneurysm thing won’t be able to win against you, nothing can whenever you make your mind up. You’re my girl. You’re wonderful, feisty. My take no prisoners warrior queen- you’re going get out of this completely unscathed.”

- MC sniffed and pulled back, clasping his larger hands with hers, her lips twitching at the sight of it.

“But…”

“No buts, that is until you are given the okay from the doctors that you’re all good after the surgery. Then this ass is mine,” he playfully growled, grabbing a handful of her rear to lighten the mood. MC laughed, an almost strangled noise through her tears and pecked him chastely on the lips.

“But-”

“MC I know in my gut that this isn’t the end of you okay, I wouldn’t let anything bad happen to you, you know that right?” he said earnestly as he looked into her eyes.

- “I know but-”

“But what?”

- “My hair!” she wailed much to his surprise. “They’re going to shave a huge patch of my hair off and I’m going to look like an idiot!” she continued, fat tears rolling down her face.

- Zen stared at her nonplussed before throwing his head back in laughter. This woman was strong. She wasn’t afraid of death. She feared for her style. She was his match in every way.

- Before they took her in to prepare her, he asked a favour with the nurses at the station who wholeheartedly agreed to assist him in his quest.

- Without a second thought or the slightest hesitation he cut off his pony tail and the nurses shaved off his signature ivory locks. MC screamed in protest but he would have none of it.

“It’s you and me MC. Whatever you do, I do. Your hair will grow back with mine and we will do all of this together. So you make sure you get out of this surgery and we can get back to living our lives together,” he negotiated as they started to wheel her away. “Promise?”

“Promise!” she called out to him, holding up a pinkie finger as they rolled down the corridor.

- Everything was hazy and everything felt heavy when she prized her eyes open, but she saw her handsome Zen and knew he was saying something sweet to her and all was right in the world. She could hear him saying something, she couldn’t quite make out exactly what but she knew they were comforting and probably stupid. Ah Jagi, you look so ravishing in that hospital gown or I got you baby girl or MC! You should have heard how you raved about my skills in bed as you came down from the anaesthetic! They need to keep me in the hospital to do all sorts of tests on how it could be possible for a man to be so beautiful and so talented in the bedroom- they say it’s some sort of genetic wonderment, I say it’s all because of you.

- “Thank you for coming back to me.”

- They said they did the best they could with what they had, that she would need constant supervision for the time being and they needed to keep close observation on the aneurysm to see if their intervention measures worked. That meant for the first time in a long time Zen willingly cancelled his schedule, all of his schedule. He didn’t attend any interviews or photoshoots, no fan-meets or even any online streaming events- his only goal was to care for MC. Even when she realised it was the premiere of his biggest feature film to date, the project she had fought so hard for him to get and he worked so diligently for- nothing would sway him. His place was with her and she just needed to get over the fact that there was nothing more important to him than her.

- “Zen, don’t be a fool.”

“I’m not. That’s why I’m staying here.”

“Zen! After everything we’ve done to get to this point, you need to be there!”

“I don’t need to do anything but be here with you, you’re the only reason I’ve gotten anywhere these last 5 years!” he yelled back, clearly not budging from his stance. MC was about to retort with a snappy comeback but as she did she got a sharp pain in her head and got woozy, prompting Zen to rush over and pick her up like she were a doll and place her back on the bed all the while apologising for yelling at her and hurting her and if she really wanted him to go he would, whatever would make her feel better.

MC let out a small sniffle and outstretched her arms towards him prompting the man to lay beside her and hold her to him, his immense warm radiating into her, his body comfortable against her like a weighted blanket luring her into sleep.

“Don’t go. Stay with me.”

“Always.”

- For a time after that, everything went well.

- Her check-ups were positive and things seemed to be under control.

- Then the headaches started. Not just the kind that a few ibuprofen could handle but the kind that had her crying, pulling at her skin to stop the pain. Then she had difficulty focusing her eyes at times. It was when she was falling down and forgetting how she got on the floor that he –

“I’m here Jagi. I’m right here. Don’t be scared… oh please… please don’t cry.”

- Those dreams had come back again. And once again, he swept them away because he refused to accept them. He would change the outcome. He had already saved her once, he would do it again. He just needed time.

- The doctors were useless. Absolutely useless. He punched one right in the face, it was a miracle he didn’t sue him. Perhaps he had felt sorry for MC and paid heed to her pained pleas that he not press charges against her carer. Or in truth, perhaps he felt sorry for him, the mess of a man on his hands and knees on the floor begging him to take his life instead of hers. As if the doctor had that kind of power to grant his wish. He would never know.

- MC urged him, begged him to back to work. She would be fine. She could stay with her mother and he could pick her up and it would be fine-

“Whatever you do. I do, remember? If you’re staying here, then so am I- stop trying to get rid of me,” he scolded before attacking her with his wondrous fingers, finding every single ticklish spot on her to force her to forget such treacherous thoughts.

- He had taken a liking to making her breakfast every day and actually eating with her, a luxury that they couldn’t afford during his normal timetable; she usually grabbed a large coffee for both of them to tide them over until they got on set to snack whatever they could before sharing lunch together… when possible. How they didn’t sit down more often to eat together all those years beforehand was baffling to him, it wasn’t something he was going to take for granted again. Moments with her just truly enjoying each other’s company with some good food as they sat in their pyjamas- he wouldn’t take it for granted anymore.

- Some days he let her cook when her symptoms weren’t too severe and he wasn’t petrified she was going to chop her finger off accidentally trying to make a bowl of cereal. Zen had to duck from her attack of dry Cheerios when he had made the mistake of saying so out loud. Not that he minded, without his long hair it made cleaning himself up much easier.

- He took the opportunity of being mostly unrecognisable to the public to go out and enjoy what they could. Going to the movies like a normal couple and tenderly making out in the back row when she felt up to it like some loved up teenagers. Going window shopping and having her try on outfits she had planned to wear for his future premieres and seeing her being fawned over by shop assistants made him beam with pride. None of those dresses would ever out shine her beauty for him… but the smile she gave him as he told her she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen when she donned a particularly dull dress, stole the air from his lungs.

- Zen liked to take her out for walks around the city or they’d drive out somewhere nice to take in the sights of whichever town or park they found themselves in- until she grew too tired and he would carry her on his back like she weighed nothing, never once complaining if he had to carry her for five minutes or fifty.

- Once the snow started he rented a cabin for the week and they lounged about naked as the day they were born; at times indulging in each other and others just lying in each other’s arms in silence. Words didn’t mean too much when Zen could understand everything her eyes silently confided in him. They said she loved him, that she was grateful to him and that with him, she was safe. That she was happy.

- It was on their way back to Seoul that she had her first seizure.

- She plummeted onto the ground, thankfully covered with fresh soft snow to cradle her fall. Zen tried to talk her through it, to keep her in a safe position until help arrived and the fit ceased. Seeing her so helpless, her body betraying her so completely and him utterly powerless to help her- he wanted to scream but this wasn’t about him, it was about her and he needed to focus on her. It couldn’t have been more than two minutes until she stopped shaking and her limbs started to relax under his hands and her breathing returned to normal.

“Z-Zen?”

“I’m here Jagiya.”

“I… I’m cold,” she said turning her face to look up at him. Zen looked into her eyes, he could see what she truly meant.

- Zen, I’m scared.

- Me too MC, me too.

- The doctors did their tests. She looked so small in her hospital gown. So small and tired.

- Their interventional measures… they were no longer working.

- “There’s nothing else we can do.”

- They walked together hand in hand down the stark white hallways of the hospital not saying a word, neither knowing how to proceed. He was feeling too many emotions to even begin picking out which one he was actively experiencing at any time, he could only imagine what MC was feeling. He felt a quick squeeze of his fingers and found MC gazing up at him, with clear eyes and a weak smile on her lips.

“Let’s go home Zen.”

- There’s nothing else we can do. Let’s enjoy the rest of whatever time I have.

- He waited until she was asleep and went into the kitchen and pulled out six pack and drank, one after another, nothing able to sate the growing chasm in the pit of his stomach. When he had finished that pack he quickly checked up on MC who was still resting soundly and decided to walk down the street to the nearest convenience store and pick himself up another pack or three of any available alcoholic beverage to drown some of his sorrows. He was entitled to it god damn it, he just needed to feel nothing at all, no confusion, no to too many things to process at once - just a drunken stupor he’d regret in the morning. That’s what he needed.

- He had gotten there and filled a little cart with so many beers they threatened to topple over, so he did the only reasonable thing and drank a few right there in the store. He could hear a few people whispering about the weird guy in the back chugging down drinks like the end of the world, joke’s on them, it was ending. A world without her in it was no world worth living in.

- “Yo. Slow it down man,” he heard a familiar drawl say. He did not want to see him. He didn’t want to see anyone. Zen drained the final drop out of the bottle and turned back to see white and pink and an inordinate amount of leather. Reaching down into his cart, he picked up another can and cracked open the tab, nodding half-heartedly towards the younger Choi brother before downing another- oh shit, there it was. Blissful ignorance rushing through his veins. “Seriously man what the fuck, get a hold of yourself.”

“You know what Saeran, just fuck off okay,” he said, or slurred, who the hell knew.

“No I don’t think so,” he said waving off his friends that he had originally entered with. “What’s going on with you? Why are you doing this?” he asked, managing to pull the cart of drinks away from Zen’s hand.

“Fuck. Off. Choi,” he spat out before polishing off his drink. Saeran clucked his tongue and shook his head in pity, he didn’t need to be a genius to know that the man before him was hurting. He knew because he had felt a very similar pain before. He had tried to drown that pain and could easily recognise it in the man before him.

“Yeah yeah I heard you. I will. After I get you back home,” he said pulling at Zen’s arm and shoving some money on the counter to pay for the consumed beverages. Zen yanked his arm away from Saeran and almost lost his footing, his natural grace the only thing saving him from falling head first into the rack of glass bottled condiments.

“I’m not ready to go back yet, don’t touch me, I’m fine-”

“Sure drinking at a convenience store at 3am in the morning on a Tuesday dressed in your pyjama pants and a shirt and slippers is really the epitome of fine-”

“I don’t need this right now-”

“And that’s why I’m helping you-”

“I don’t want your god damned help-”

“And that’s why you’re getting it. Come on, don’t make this harder than-” Zen had pushed him back and sent him flying into the front desk, startling the attendant. Saeran muttered an apology and stood in front of him, feet grounded once more in case he decided to attack him once more.

“Just leave me alone, okay.”

“I can’t. MC would kill both of us if I did,” Saeran explained with his palms raised to the ceiling as if he were trying to reason with Zen that he truly had no other choice but to stick around until he finally submitted.

“MC won’t be around long enough to do anything to either of us,” Zen whispered, tear-laced lashes fanning across his cheeks as he closed his eyes, the alcohol loosening his tongue and heightening his emotional outburst. Saeran swallowed his shock for the moment, his mind quickly digesting the new information Zen had just given him. He didn’t think she was that bad but by seeing the normally suave and cocky actor looking like a homeless man trying to kill himself with alcohol was enough to know that he wasn’t being melodramatic about it. MC was going to die and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Saeran clamped his lips together to seal any shuddering breaths he had wanted to take, or any pathetic noise he was bound to make after hearing one of his closest friends was not long for this world. Breathing deeply from his nose and exhaling strongly through his mouth, Saeran nodded to himself as he made up his mind.

“All the more reason for you to get home to her.”

- Zen had wanted to fight him, to pick up another drink and just sit in the corner of the store and pretend just for a little bit longer that this wasn’t happening. But it wasn’t the truth. It was happening. And every second away from MC felt like another needle to his heart. If he didn’t have long left with her, no matter how long it was, shouldn’t he be with her as much as humanly possible?

- “Saeran… can I still get that ride?”

Saeran smiled and dangled the car keys from his right index finger.

“Sure. But if you puke in car I’m telling ‘Young you did it and you can be at his mercy for stinking up his baby.”

- He stumbled into their apartment and wandered back into the bedroom. MC still asleep.

- Zen tiptoed into the room and watched over her prone form, the rise and fall of her chest enough to ease the dread in his heart that she had left him while he was away drinking himself into oblivion. Slipping under the covers carefully, he cautiously took her into his embrace and allowed the tip of his nose to trace at her warm, soft skin, still clinging to the scent of their soap from their bath together earlier in the day.

- Everyday. Every minute. Every second. Always. He would never leave her side.

- MC was getting worse, even though neither of them was saying it, it was obvious her health was in decline. The pain in her head so strong that she couldn’t make a sound as she buried her head in her arms and shook on the bed, her mouth open to scream with no sound but stifled noises from the top of her throat able to come out. Sometimes even the softest ambient light hurt her and she would encase herself in total darkness, letting herself succumb to self-pity and allowed herself mourn the loss of what could have been.

- Still Zen tried his best to maintain the most normal of lives for her. They would eat in bed by candlelight. He would push her in a wheelchair around the city and he would put on fashion shows for her as she was too tired or weak to do it herself. They would watch black and white movies because they hurt her eyes less and they would drive- drive for hours sometimes just to see the world pass by and pretend that nothing else mattered but the two of them.

- “Hey Jagi?” he called out to her as he washed the dishes from lunch.

“Mmm?” she hummed back, sitting up in bed as she tried to read a book. It was a good day. Her vision wasn’t swimming and she could focus. It was so nice to be able to see Zen again.

“It’s a really nice day outside, you feeling up for a quick walk?” he chimed, turning off the water and made his way back to their bedroom to lean against the door frame. His hair had grown back much faster than hers she noted, the longest strands able to reach the end of his ears whereas she only managed to have the shortest of pixie cuts come through upon her head. She half joked she looked like an egg and Zen answered that it was no wonder he enjoyed heating her up and eating her. She scoffed at him and slapped him the next morning when he boiled up some eggs and drew their likenesses on the shells.

MC tested her limbs, first her arms and then her legs, everything seemed fine and she thought she could even walk a little on her own today- she was so sick of being stuck at home and being coddled between the couch and the bed, the bed and the dining table, the dining table to the bathroom. She wanted to feel the grass beneath her feet, if only for a moment. Feel the sun on her face without having a window between her and the rays. Hear children playing instead of trucks go past their house. Yes. Yes she wanted to go for a walk.

- Zen had helped her into the bath with him; he carefully washed her hair and scrubbed her back, pressing kisses on every new spot his hands had just cleaned. She was so relaxed she almost fell asleep until he asked if she had changed her mind about their outing and she sprang back up like a puppy being asked if they wanted to go out. Perhaps she was just like that. Not the way she’d imagined wearing a collar and lead with Zen but at this point she’d take whatever adventure she could get. Zen questioned the amused expression on her face but she refused to let him know the reasoning behind her secret merriment. She didn’t want to give him any ideas.

- She asked which park they were going to and he answered the one that was closest to them. MC pouted as he helped her get dressed in a pretty sundress she hadn’t worn for almost a year and a light cardigan to keep any chill away from her. She decided not to sulk too much, he probably chose the location because it was close to home and if she needed to go back if she had any symptom flare ups, she would be grateful to be back home as quickly as possible.

- The drive there took no longer than a couple of minutes and after finding a carpark quickly Zen had prepared to get her wheelchair out only for her to stop him, telling him that she wanted to try to stretch the cobwebs out of her legs to which he only smiled back and nodded. MC looked out of windscreen, there was some sort of party being held not too far from them. She could see some kids running and some people all gathered around and enjoying themselves and she felt an envious smile slip across her face. When was the last time she’d been well enough to attend a party? Goodness, nearly four months at least. Yoosung had practically cried when she and Zen had entered through the door, the blonde man clearly very drunk, enhancing his already tearful welcome.

- “Do you think we could steal some cake from that party over there?” she cheekily asked Zen as he opened her door and helped her stand up, her legs giving a tentative wobble as she acclimated herself. Her boyfriend smirked and had that devious glint in his eye that she only knew too well.

“Why don’t we go over and ask?”

- MC’s eyes widened as she realised that he absolutely meant to do as she asked. She swatted at him impatiently, telling him he was an idiot and that she didn’t mean it, she was just joking and…

- Those kids were her niece and nephews running around.

- The people congregated around were her mother and father, her sister, the RFA and some of Zen’s co-stars from their last project- this was for her?

- Jaehee came over with the biggest smile she had ever seen and placed a crown of flowers on her head and supplied her with a modest bouquet of wildflowers made up of her favourite blooms from their numerous nature walks, before kissing her on the cheek and walking away.

“What… what is… what is all this?” she asked, her heart constricting at the sight of all her favourite people around them, all smiling and some even crying. She turned to where Zen had been only to find her father come up behind her, his face ruddy with emotion as he offered his arm out to her. The other hand motioning for her to look ahead as she Zen positioning himself at what looked like an altar covered in the same wildflowers, Saeran behind him and Jaehee on the other side.

- MC could barely breathe, her heart soaring at the sight of the man she loved more than anything, waiting for her at the end of the aisle. His beaming face lighting up the area better than the sun ever could, his eyes fixed only on her and nothing else. He simply mouthed the words will you marry me and she nodded, so hard she thought she would her head would fall off, causing his smile to grow even more as he held out his open hand to her- just waiting for her to come to him.

- MC released a choked laugh as she clung onto her father’s arm, her other hand wrapped around the bouquet tightly to confirm this wasn’t just another dream, this was happening and it was real.

- When they finally reached Zen, her father placed a kiss on her temple and whispered words of love in her ear before taking a seat next to her sobbing mother. She took his hand and yes, thank god yes, it was all real.

- The ceremony was short, it had to be to ensure she would be able to endure it but she didn’t care. She would have stood there for days on end if it meant being able to marry the man beside her. Neither of them could take their eyes off each other, both having to be prompted by the wedding minister to answer “I do”.

- Their first kiss as man and wife was tinged with the salt of both their tears but nothing tasted sweeter to them. Not even the cake that MC had ‘stolen’ a slice of.

- The drive home, MC couldn’t stop smiling at the light glinting off their matching plain white gold bands, simple and elegant just like Zen was, the meaning behind the ring far more important than the kind of ring it was.

- He had promised a whole week of it just being them, no doctors, no visitors, nothing she didn’t want to do. It was just going to be her and him, the occasional bowl of cereal and their bed.

- Married life was much as the same as life before, nothing apart the signing of paper and rings to prove anything was different between them. However the knowledge that he was officially her husband and she his wife, it added a pep to his step, a deeper renewed vigour to continue to care for her no matter the outcome.

- She slept longer than normal, but after the excitement of the last couple of days he couldn’t blame her for being tired. She at least wasn’t complaining of pain anymore and her eyes weren’t too bad for the most part.

- It was into the second week of their elongated honeymoon after he had done his best to alleviate her sore neck as they sat on the couch that MC turned to him, her eyes wide with revelation.

“What is it Jagi?” he asked, massaging her head and relishing the feel of her soft hair on his palm. She hummed appreciatively and leaned into his touch, earning her a smile from her husband.

“We never had a first dance, at our wedding- we didn’t get to dance!” she said dreamily, still mesmerized by feel of his hands on her. Zen hadn’t wanted to push his luck during the wedding, he didn’t want to exert her too much and cause a random headache to appear or cause her any embarrassment if her legs tired in front of their guests, he knew how much she hated showing anyone her weakness- even him. Maybe him most of all. Though here, in the confines of their home, with only him and her, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to indulge in their first dance.

- Zen put on their favourite song on his phone and stood up with a flourish, executing his most perfect bow to his wife, his hand outstretched to her once again as she sat before him on the couch. MC laughed as she demurely bowed her head and slid her hand into his. He carefully helped her off the seat and locked his free arm around her middle, the curve of her waist fitting perfectly into the crook on his elbow. He had started to sing along to the music knowing how much MC enjoyed hearing him sing to her, MC joining in as much as she could in the parts she was sure her voice wouldn’t crack in. Zen didn’t care even if it did, he loved singing with her, off key and off pitch- it never mattered. The woman he loved was singing with him, nothing would ever sound as good as their voices together.

- Zen skilfully lifted her as he spun around, putting her feet on top of his as he could feel her start to waver in her steps, her hands griping his own so tightly.

“I’m so glad you’re my husband,” she said as she lay her head against his chest, suddenly too heavy to keep up on her own. Zen chuckled and pressed a kiss against her forehead as he continued to dance for them both.

“I told you Jagi, it’s going to be me and you forever.”

“Always, right?” she asked quietly, closing her eyes to listen to the sound of his heartbeat, so strong in her ear.

“Always,” he affirmed, bringing up her hand to kiss the back of it before placing it against chest beside her face. Only for it to fall down loose beside her.

- Zen stopped for a moment, it wasn’t the first time her limbs had failed her but never so suddenly.

“Jagi, you getting tired on me?”

- …

- “… Jagi.”

- …

- “… Jagiya.”

- …

- He couldn’t loosen his grip on her. He knew if he did her whole body would fall within his embrace and… to see her listless… lifeless… that wasn’t his MC. That wasn’t his wife.

- So Zen cupped the back of her head with his other arm lifting her up against him, her feet dangling above his as he continued to sway them back and forth to the music. And long after it finished.

- “I’m… I’m so glad to be your husband MC.”

- When his feet ached so much he could no longer stand and his arms burned to the point of numbness, both of them fell to the ground, his face buried in her chest as he cried the tears of man who would never learn to dance with another again. His feet only knew the beat she set for them. Zen would dance with her again one day but until then, they would remain still. Until he found her again.

- Always.

#mystic messenger #mysme fanfic #zen #zen x mc #hyun ryu #mysme headcanon #angst

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letterboxd · 3 years

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Life Detained.

The Mauritanian director Kevin Macdonald talks with Jack Moulton about researching Guantanamo Bay’s top secrets, Tahar Rahim’s method-acting techniques, the ingenuity of humanity during the pandemic, and his favorite Scottish films.

“You’ve got to understand that for a Muslim man like Tahar, this role has a much greater significance than it does for you or me.” —Kevin Macdonald

It’s not uncommon for a director to release two films in one year, but Academy-Award winning—for his 1999 documentary One Day in September—director Kevin Macdonald is guilty of this achievement multiple times. Ten years ago, he released his first crowd-sourced documentary Life in a Day and the period epic The Eagle within months of each other. A decade on, he’s done it again.

The Scottish director (and grandson of legendary filmmaker Emeric Pressburger) released both his Life in a Day follow-up and the legal drama The Mauritanian this month. The latter tells the story of Guantanamo Bay detainee Mohamedou Ould Slahi (sometimes written as Salahi), who was held and tortured in the notorious US detention center for fourteen years without a charge. The film, adapted from Slahi’s 2015 memoir Guantánamo Diary, features Jodie Foster and Shailene Woodley as his defense attorneys Nancy Hollander and Teri Duncan, with Benedict Cumberbatch, who also signed on as the film’s producer, playing prosecutor Lt. Stuart Couch.

Benedict Cumberbatch as prosecutor Lt. Stuart Couch in ‘The Mauritanian’.

The Mauritanian also introduces French star Tahar Rahim to a global audience, in the role of Slahi. “The ensemble is excellent across the board,” writes Zach Gilbert, “while Tahar Rahim is best in show overall, bringing honorable heart and humanity to his role [of] the titular mistreated prisoner.”

Much of the story is filmed as an office-based legal thriller involving thick files, intense conversations, and Jodie Foster’s very bright lipstick. Macdonald expertly employs aspect ratio to signify narrative shifts into scenes recreating Slahi’s vivid recollections of torture and his achingly brief conversations with unseen fellow detainees.

Qualifying for this year’s awards season due to extended deadlines, The Mauritanian has already earned Golden Globe nominations for Best Actor and Best Supporting Actress for Rahim and Foster respectively. Slahi remains unable to travel due to no-fly lists, but he was a valuable resource to the production, providing an accurate and rare depiction of a sympathetic Muslim character in an American film.

It was the eve of Life in a Day 2020’s Sundance Film Festival premiere when we Zoomed with Macdonald. Behind him, we spied a full set of the Italian posters for Michelangelo Antonioni’s classic Blow-Up. As it turns out, he’s not a fan of the film—only the posters—so we got him talking about his desert-island top ten after a few questions about his new film.

The attention to detail on Guantanamo Bay in The Mauritanian is impressive. There are procedures depicted that you rarely see on-screen. How did you conduct your research? Obviously Guantanamo Bay is a place which the American government spends a great deal of effort keeping secret. It was important to Mohamedou and me that we depicted the reality of the procedures as accurately as we possibly could. That research came primarily from Mohamedou who has an incredible memory. He drew sketches and made videos of himself lying down in spaces and showing how he could stretch half his arm out [in his cell]. There are a lot of photographs on the internet of Guantanamo Bay which are [fake] and others are from a later period because the place developed a lot over the years since it started in 2002 and Mohamedou was able to [identify] which photos were rooms, courtyards and medical centers he had been in.

Director Kevin Macdonald on set with Jodie Foster.

How did you approach creating an honest representation of the graphic torture scenes, without putting the audience through it as well? Whenever films about this period are [made] they’re always from the point of view of the Americans and this time we’re with Mohamedou. You can’t underestimate the fact that there have really been no mainstream American cinematic portrayals of Muslims at all, so in portraying a sympathetic Muslim character who’s also accused of terrorism, you’re pushing some hot buttons with people. It was important that those people who are uncomfortable with him understand why he confessed to what he confessed.

Everything you see in the film is what happened; the only difference is that they weren’t wearing masks of cats and Shrek-like creatures, they wore Star Wars masks of Yoda and Luke Skywalker in this very perverse fucked-up version of American pop culture. Obviously, we couldn’t get the rights to those. Actually, I don’t feel that it is graphic. There is more violence in your average Marvel movie. It’s psychologically disturbing because you’re experiencing this disorientating lighting, the [heavy-metal] music, and he’s being told his mother’s going to be raped and he’s flashing back to his childhood. To be empathizing with this character and then to see them to be so cruelly treated is so deeply disturbing.

How did you prepare Tahar Rahim for his convincing portrayal of such intense pain and suffering? Tahar went through a great deal of discomfort in order to achieve it. He felt that to give a performance that had any chance of being truthful, he needed to experience a little bit of what Mohamedou had suffered, so throughout the movie he would insist on wearing real shackles which made his leg bleed and give him blisters. I would plead with him to put on rubber ones and he would say “no, I have to do this so I’m not just play-acting”.

He starved himself for about three weeks leading up to a torture sequence—he had lost an awful amount of weight and he was really unsteady on his legs. I was very worried about it and I got him nutritionists and doctors but he was determined to stick with that. You’ve got to understand that for a Muslim man like Tahar, this role has a much greater significance than it does for you or me. He felt a great weight of responsibility to do this correctly, not just for Mohamedou, but he was speaking for the whole Muslim world in a way.

Jodie Foster and Shailene Woodley as defense attorneys in ‘The Mauritanian’.

What compels you to study this period in time? Mohamedou was released a couple of weeks before Trump came to power in 2016, so the story is still ongoing for him. He’s still being harassed by the American government and he’s not allowed to travel because he’s on these no-fly lists. I didn’t want to make a movie that was saying “George W. Bush is terrible”. We’ve been there, we’ve done that. This is looking back with a little bit of distance and saying “here’s the principles that we can learn from when you sidestep the rule of law”—what it takes to stand up like Lt. Stuart Couch did when everyone else around you is going along with something that’s really terrible.

You see that around Trump with the choices within the Republican Party to stand up and say they’re going to sacrifice their careers to do the right thing. It is a hard thing when there’s this mass hysteria in the air. The basic principles that the lawyer [characters] are representing is not about analyzing and replaying what happened after 9/11, they’re directly related in a bigger way to the world we all inhabit.

Did anything surprise you in how your subjects for Life in a Day 2020 addressed the pandemic? One of the most affecting characters in the film is an American who lost his home and business because of the pandemic, so he’s living in his car. He seems very depressed when you meet him for the first time, then later he’s telling us there’s something that’s giving him joy in his life. He brings out all these drones with these cameras on them and puts on this VR headset and loses himself by flying through the trees. I thought that was such a great metaphor for the way that human ingenuity has enabled us to survive and thrive during the pandemic.

I get the feeling of resilience from [the film]. This is a more thoughtful film than the original one. I see this as a movie of [us] being beware of our susceptibility to disease and ultimately to death and mortality, [and] how we’ve found these consolations as human beings. To me, it’s a really profound thing. It also speaks to the main theme of the film which is how we’re all so similar, same as The Mauritanian. It’s confronting you with all these people and saying we fundamentally all share the basic things that underpin our lives and the differences between us are much less important than the things we have in common.

Let’s go from Life in a Day to your life in film. What’s a Scottish film that you love but you feel is very overlooked or underrated? That’s really hard because there aren’t many Scottish films and there aren’t many good ones. Gregory’s Girl is the greatest Scottish film ever made—it’s the bible for life for me. That’s very well-known, so I would have to say Bill Forsyth’s previous film That Sinking Feeling, which was self-funded and made on 16mm black-and-white. It has some of the same actors and characters as Gregory’s Girl in it. Or my grandfather Emeric Pressberger’s film I Know Where I’m Going! which is a rare romantic comedy set in Scotland.

John Gordon Sinclair and Dee Hepburn in Bill Forsyth’s ‘Gregory’s Girl’ (1980).

Which film made you want to become a filmmaker? I think it was Errol Morris’s The Thin Blue Line, which is one of the top five documentaries ever made and in my top ten desert-island movies.

What else is in your desert-island top ten? Oh god, don’t! I knew you were going to ask me that. I’ll give a few. I would say there would have to be something by Preston Sturges—maybe The Lady Eve or The Palm Beach Story. There would have to be a film written by my grandfather, so probably The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp, which is the best British film ever made. There would have to be Singin’ in the Rain, which is the most purely joyful film I’ve ever seen. There would probably be The Battle of Algiers, which I rewatched recently and was an inspiration on The Mauritanian. Citizen Kane I also rewatched in anticipation of watching Mank, of which I was very disappointed. I thought it completely missed the point and was kind of boring.

Which was the best film released in 2020 for you? I thought the Russian film Dear Comrades! was really stunning. It was made by a director [Andrei Konchalovsky] in his 80s who first worked with Andrei Tarkovsky back in the late 1950s. He co-scripted Ivan’s Childhood. I would love to make my masterpiece when I’m 86 too!