#if i don’t like ur characters ill stop just as fast as i would if i didn’t like ur plot
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kinda think it’s weird that zuko’s scar looks so…mild in the live action. like they just drew a red splotch with little flame details in it and thought they ate. like they look right at what everyone in the fandom writes/draws/wants and did the complete opposite… make it a bit horrifying. make it intimidating. make it real.
but it’s obvious with the other choices they’re making for the characters that they don’t understand how big a part zuko’s scar (and what came with it) play in his overall character, and the entire series itself.
#but i feel like they didn’t do enough… research into burns?? it looks v strange#like#THEYRE the ones talking ab making alta a ‘drama’ and ‘serious’ or whatever so why wouldn’t they pay more attention or put more effort into#that?#over all not jazzed for the live action show#just v obvious they don’t understand core parts struggles and arcs of the characters and how those impact the plot#they’re just too plot focused#which is sadly what a lot of media is today. which sucks bc the characters are such a big and important part of stories???#if not more important than the plot sometimes???#if i don’t like ur characters ill stop just as fast as i would if i didn’t like ur plot#smh#live action#live action atla#live action avatar#alta#alta series#zuko#zuko’s scar#scar#burn scar
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Topic: Genshin impact.
au: Sagau.
idea: So what if you had the powers of every character you played as in every game you played and then get isekaid into genshin impact with imposter au. I imagine it goes smth like
Zhongli: “I will have order!”
reader, Who played Roblox as someone who lagged the game (explanation: I’m pretty sure ping is also how time works in games. If you can control the flow of ping you can control the flow of time in games.): “ZA WARUDO!”
Heyyy!! Thanks for waiting for the reply/response from my slow ass :0
So they did clarify what they meant/expand so imma just copy paste that here!
“k now I remember. So basically imma write it here since it’s easier: Basically you don’t have to (but you can) transform into the character that has those set of powers but if you do those powers are enhanced.”
Sun: Reader (”you”/they/them)
Orbit: Headcanons-ish, Light Imposter AU (as in, NOT Yandere/Dark), mild crossover elements bc Shapeshifter Shenanigans™️
Stars: bro idek
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: mild cussing, genshin typical mild violence, & Trigger Warnings: none known.
Please comment if I missed any. /gen
☆
so fair warning,, ive never seen jojo bizarre, but i appreciate i come off well-read/watched? LMAO
so im just gonna kinda,, guess? like just cycle thru diff. random media, and im hoping both me and you reading this will have a fun time (as this is a little challenge, but i like it so ill give it a shot, dont kno if its a good one but- 😅)
so to set the scene, of how u got to this point, ykno of running like ur life (maybe?) depends on u running around different teyvat countries,
u thought it was weird everyone knew a little too much about you?? (ofc theyve heard u during gaming, they know u the same way we all know Markiplier, get it?)
then a bunch of NPCs/Vision users/Archons?? were REALLY invested in talking to you, which freaked u out even more
and by the time you saw Zhongli, yknow, just the oldest god in game, making a fast-walk towards you, ykno the retired god who didnt move an inch when an old water god attacked Liyue for a test, is now hurrying to you???
ur logically get so fucking scared sm shits abt to go down, u just start running
it isnt until ur reaching for a ledge and some webbing shoots out of ur arm (from a glitchy little spot on ur arm, where it could be coming out of ur skin, but sometimes its a blue and red bracelet)
it latched onto the nearest building, and thats how u find out u can grapple ur way, literally Spiderman style, out of the harbor
and bro, idk if it would be fun, or confusing and stressful, or maybe both?? to just find out u can use any video game power from any game youve played before as you go running from countries bc for some freaky reason they know too much abt you/are pursuing you-
dUDE- they had small statues of you in like every little section of their cities
u head to Mondstadt and as Venti comes screaming and flying at you (in excitement, but ur freaked), u go to hold a hand up and suddenly ur holding a heavy stone tablet that unleashes some holographic yellow chains that freeze him in place-?? why is this familiar-
oh my god u have the sheikah slate from Breath of the Wild,
and as ur booking it out of there, u manage to get ahold of a sword, and u know exactly how to use it to knock back favonius knights trying to stop you (they are concerned for their god who is just unleashing random powers on ppl, pls let Grandmaster Jean just talk to you Your Majesty-!!)
by the time you teleport ur way to Inazuma, (bc u still have this worlds access to ur player/traveler’s powers), ur trying to find a nice place to stay for a little bit
at least in that sweet spot of the Raiden not noticing/finding you, while things cool down on the main continent, before moving on,
and u get some tools to help fashion just a little shelter, bc u dont have any money/mora rn, and ur able to literally build a house???
a mailbox pops up and thanks you for renting with Tom Nook???? As in Animal Crossing-
and rlly if the BOTW/slate thing didnt clue u into video game powers, then this definitely would tbh lmao
right as u see Yae Miko circling ur house, with an armful of books? ..is she planning to thru them at you??, u get the hell out of dodge before her favorite god can follow along
(she knows ur prefrences in books and got authors/trends to start so youd have plenty to read, and she was making sure it was ur house before politely dropping them off! how was she to know thatd spook their favorite God, Ei?!)
u get to Sumeru and think ur safe, hiding in an abandoned forest watcher outpost (1 person treehouse rlly) when Nahida shows up in ur dreams,
and u just,
walk out of the dream, into reality, and possess a nearby ruin guard so u can sleep in peace, bc she cant access a robot,
that one baffled u as you re-possessed ur own body before realizing-
Five Nights at Freddy’s. 💀
U cant do that forever, so u try Fontaine, hoping Neuvillette/Furina wont rlly give af abt you, plus theyre the latest region, so maybe they have the least exposure to whatever the other archons didnt like abt you??
u get there and are immediately summoned to court, and right as the mekas show up to escort you, jfc they have a mecha army
(meanwhile, theyre thinking, yknow. high profile guest/our god of gods. ofc we need state of the art mekas to escort them, its only polite-)
meanwhile ur cape has now become wings, and a mask covers ur face as you glide and fly ur way over the city in an attempt to get to where u assume Snezhnaya is
it doesnt occur to you the game until ur running out of stamnia and catch ur reflection in the waters of fontaine, Sky: Children of the Light
u hope the Tsaritsa’s dislike for other gods/Celestia doesnt extend to ur otherworldly presence so ur just hoping for the best atp tbh
tbh youd forget what all powers you have, and the absolute chaos ur causing urself as u try to desperately rememeber what games youve played thru ur entire life is NOT helping to reduce confusion when u randomly wake up with elf ears (legend of zelda/botw) or get dragged into another ruin machine when u fall asleep/faint/do smth u guess mimics death lmao- (fnaf) 💀
…
(meanwhile the Tsaritsa does get wind ur coming this way, and just, makes the people have a parade/festival to celebrate you coming,
she did also have to get Pierro/Captaino to physically restrain some of them from going ahead to meet/escort you to the palace, she’d heard how the others scared u off, and was, ironically, hoping the warm welcome would clear things up)
☆
well that was, something. 😃🫠
sorry lil car, that was such a fun idea idk if i did it justice!! i thought itd be too op to include every media youve consumed ever, so i kept it to video games, (which, could u cheat the system if youve played smash bros??)
i hope it was at least a decent read, and sorry im half asleep so i was not v funny this time around, but, again, hope u got smth out of it 😭
</3
on another note, im having my wisdom teeth surgery this friday, send whatever u got my way, prayers, blessings, good vibes, ill take anything im nervous 🙃
have a good week guys!
Safe Travels Lil Car,
💀♒
If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"
(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit / @chinuneko / @silvers-tongue
If ur tag doesnt work, pls check ur settings to see if ur a "searchable blog"!! Its not the same as the Ai selling data thing.
#genshin isekai#sagau#genshin sagau#genshin imagines#genshin impact#my asks#genshin impact sagau#genshin x reader#aqua asks#aqua chats#10/10 rlly fun idea#this was fun to juggle and even tho i feel like i kinda flopped it#it was still a fun idea for future sagau endeavors tbh#:) <3#no but srsly im getting wisdom teeth surgery pls send everything good u got my way im nervous#its just intimidating to be knocked out and drugged up what can i say#might even write some sagau angst abt it when im languishing my fate in bed afterwards
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Random dr characters react to you asking to ride them
taka, byakuya, leon, souda, gundham, kaito and rantaro - nsfw
if i missed anyone you want these of, leave an ask!!! ill do whoever :D
also may make a reverse one of characters reacting to u asking them to ride u.......... if u guys want that hehe
Kiyotaka Ishimaru
“Y-You want to what?!”
Blushes like crazy man cannot handle a thing.
Low key scared you’d get hurt when you bottomed out
He’d absolutely let you because hes a gentleman.
newfound fav thing wow. nervous to ask you to do it again so he kind of just gets you into the position when youre kissing heheh
“You look so good like this-”
slowly hed become more and more comfortable and hold your hips and help you. praise you!!!!!!!!!! tell you how good you were doing
HOLDS UR HAND WHILE U RIDE HIM CRIES
constantly asking if youre okay and if you’re too tired :’))) “Y-You can stop if you need to! I can take over”
But when you shush him and tell him to stop worrying and start riding him faster hed m e l t. just go into shock and watch you do ur thing
Byakuya Togami
“Oh? Really? Why should I let you, hm?”
He’d tease you for asking but secretly hes very proud of you for being able to get the courage to come out and say it.
Either treat you like you’re priceless if youre genuinely nervous or be a complete asshole the entire time. No in between.
“Careful, my treasure. Don’t want to rush yourself.” // “Well? You going to do it or what? You wanted this, may I remind you.”
Wouldn’t touch you very much, just look up at you and watch your face as you grab onto him for dear life and rock on him.
Hed mark you up tho. so much. just to make sure everyone you see knows youre his
He would hold your face though, whispering to you. Also would absolutely hold your throat.
“Come sit on your throne, my prince(ss).”
Once he was close he would lose his cool persona and pull your hips down and fuck up into you and curse and growl and doubwdddaodubawodihawoi bruhrruh thank u sm togami
Leon Kuwata
He’d just bite his lip and. be like aw shiiiiii
i imagine him to be kinky but have no idea ab it and neither do u so all of the sudden hes like mega egotistical
“Why didn’t you say so earlier, baby?”
He’d grab ur hips and just immediately have his tongue down ur throat as soon as u asked him
From then on he’d make you ride him like every time u got busy bc he just loves to see u all desperate and doin all the work.
you wanting him immediately gets him off bc ego smh
“That’s right. Bounce on that dick.”
touches ur chest/butt while u ride him bc he likes jiggle. bonus points if he can motorboat u
like togami he’ll sit back and watch a lot, one hand on your hip biting his lip. the sight of u literally gets him off as much as fucking you
Kazuichi Souda
jfc this dude. nosebleed instantly
“Holy shit, please! That’d be so hot- I, holy shit.”
he can barely handle sex by itself, now youre gonna do this to him??? jeez what were you thinking.
i hc that he basically goes feral during sex just. rlly fast and hard and loud and just streams of dirty talk
so hes basically holding your hips and fucking up into you and praising/degrading you (whatever hes in the mood for)
Youd barely be able to ride him, it’d mostly be him fucking up into you while you just shake above him and hold onto him for dear life
“You’re so good, feels so good, f-fuck baby,”
can go for a while,,,, which is a benefit of him doing most of the work bc you’d prolly collapse if you rode him for as long as he would want you to
hed just go so fast you’d be writhing and drooling all over yourself bc you can’t form a sentence. just goin wild. my man.
Gundham Tanaka
queue blushing scarf sprite
“O-Oh! My rose! I didn’t expect such a request from you... But... I suppose you can, yes.”
Hes nervous literally up until the sex itself, where he becomes just. huge soft dom vibes lol
holds u so gently hehehe. little groans and praises bc wow he loves u so much
“That’s my beautiful little pearl. You’re doing wonderfully for me.”
Keeps it very slow and loving, making sure you know how well you’re doing every second.
will tuck your hair behind your ear and stroke your face and hush you when you whine too loud
loves to look you in the eyes n will rest his forehead on yours. he loves your expressions so so much
hums very deeply. you know the gundham voice. hes just so pleased and so proud of you for doing so well.
kisses everywhere :) n soft bites and hickeys as a reminder you’re his
Kaito Momota
This guy. God he’d get a boner in a millisecond.
“Y-You’d do that??”
Touches u all over when you do. Like wow he’s. Yeah. So in awe genuinely can’t form a sentence at the sight of you.
Praise u so much tho. In a kaito way.
“You’re so strong! Look at you! You can sit all the way down, take all of me in. Such a good baby.”
After the first time he often just sits against the headboard and touches himself inviting you to sit on him :3
Or he’ll flip u over mid fuck and just lay back and flex his muscles while you bounce on him Bc wow his ego. Bigger than his dick.
Kisses your neck n chest while you ride him
Rantaro Amami
holy shit i am gonna have a stroke writing this im a whore for rantaro anyways
“I believe that can be arranged, my love.”
the first time hed be waiting for you all ready and beckon you with his finger and hed have all his rings on and hngngggggggg
praise the fuck out of you if ur nervous. just telling you how good you’re doing and being so gentle and sweet. my beloved
but when ur comfy enough. oh god. the god complex comes out. hes just staring at you with this fucking look and taking in all of your sounds and iefubaieufiudh
“You’re doing so good, you look so beautiful. So gorgeous sitting on my cock.”
His jewelry would jingle when you bounced what the FUCK
absolutely hold your waist and scratch you up. also bite your collarbones i know that man loves collarbones
would roll his hips up to meet yours and push himself deeper and bite his lip when you cry out at it
a lot of eye contact. hed encourage you to keep your eyes open if you were scared to look at him too. just staring you in the eyes and groaning just to turn you on more knowing youre on this man’s dick and BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEee i may pass away
Haha simps
#rantaro amami#rantaro x reader#kazuichi soda#kazuichi x reader#gundham tanaka#gundham x reader#byakuya togami#byakuya x reader#leon kuwata#leon x reader#kiyotaka ishimaru#taka x reader#drv3#sdr2#dr1#danganronpa#danganronpa smut#bottomshuichis
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Hello!!! I love ur fics sm 😭💖 This is weirdly specific and been plaguing my mind for days,,, Can I req an angsty fic where Atsumu broke up with the reader because he wants to chase his dreams and ultimately leaves but with the reader saying "I'll wait" . A few months later he seeks for the reader again and finds out the reader has terminal illness and is dying. You can decide if there's major character death or a miracle,,,, please and thank u so much!!
𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐨𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐨 - 𝐚𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
aw thank youuuu <33 and also WOW this request is in-tense, i modified the ‘terminal illness’ part a little bit for plot convenience, but i rly hope you’re gonna like it ! i am : stressed. also, i’m a sucker for happy endings (just ignore my last bokuto fic) so i couldn’t go full angst on that one 😅
quick storytime : my great grandpa died from heartbreak and i always thought it was a beautiful (yet very sad) way to die, so i guess that’s where i got my inspiration from <3
⤷ atsumu x gn!reader | angst | word count : 1.7K
warnings : hospital environment, heart condition, mild description of ‘illness’ and mentions of death (a little)
your first kiss with miya atsumu had been sloppy, dizzy, with a strong scent of rum and smudged lip balm all over your lips. but there was no doubt that it had been the best kiss of your entire lives…
…just like your last had been the worst.
two months later, atsumu still couldn’t forget the salty taste of your lips that begged him not to leave. if he focused hard enough, he could even remember the feeling of your hands desperately clinging to his jacket in a last attempt at making him stay by your side.
but he didn’t, and as much as he hated himself for putting an end - even temporary - to what had been the most beautiful chapter of his life, he had never regretted his decision ; and he knew exactly why. you had promised to wait for him, and in pure egoism, he knew and hoped that you would. because no matter the distance, he was still madly in love with you.
which is why he did not understand why osamu was so outraged when he told him that he was finally ready to come back to you. but the younger twin knew things that his brother didn’t - he had seen you let yourself waste away, like nothing else mattered without the one you loved.
but more than that, atsumu did not know about the secret his brother promised to keep. he did not know that, two weeks ago, osamu had found you unconscious in your living room with an alarmingly slow heartbeat. the poor boy had not understood everything the doctors had told him - but whatever a cardiogenic shock was, he knew that it would have carried you off if without his intervention.
however, you had been categorical : atsumu shouldn’t not know about this, under any pretext. you refused to be a burden to the pursuit of his dreams for which he had already sacrificed so much for. but now that atsumu was back, something about this promise didn’t sit right with his brother. and so he decided to tell him everything.
« …most doctors thought about a standard heart attack » he told him after explaining the situation, on the lookout for any impulsive reaction from his brother. « … but one of them talked about something else. you might want to sit down ».
but atsumu couldn’t care less about his brother’s advice. actually, he didn’t care about anything else than you right now. it was already taking a lot of effort for him to stand there listening to samu instead of being on his way to the hospital - but he stayed. for an obscure reason that he didn’t really understand, he stayed.
« did you know that people can die of heartbreak ? » osamu asked, more serious than he had ever been in his whole life.
the blonde twin felt like the ground had suddenly swallowed him whole - although his brother was trying his best not to sound too accusating, it was more than obvious that whatever situation you were in was because of him. and only him.
« no they can’t » he tried to protest, not even believing in his own words. panic was beginning to win him over - and in a matter of seconds, he lost all his composure « WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU NOT MOVING ? LET’S GO ! » he shouted, already opening the front door. at that moment, one question burned his lips, but he knew he would never have the guts to ask it out loud.
‘did i kill them ?’
——
the steady beeps of all the machines around you were the only thing disrupting the deafening silence of your hospital room. you were sick of spending your days alone. but you had no right to complain, osamu had offered to come and see you after work every day, but you had politely refused. well, politely was a big word… your body was so exhausted that you had trouble articulating simple phrases, and therefore exclusively communicated through nods or hand gestures.
your phone had been confiscated and the doctors kept you away from the news - or at least from the negative news, because they knew that your heart might give out at the tiniest emotional distress.
which is why you were so surprised to hear a knock on your door at about 3pm, outside of the nurses’ shift hours. knowing that you were too weak to talk, osamu let himself in, slowly closing the door behind him before coming closer to your bed.
« how are you doing ? » he asked, resting his hands on the other end of the bed. you shrugged, pointing at the IV and all the monitoring surrounding you. as long as these machines were there, it was hard to feel better than just ok. « listen, um… someone is here for you. the doctors said i could bring him in, but i wanted your authorization first… » he started before clearing his throat. « atsumu is back. do you- are you ready to see him ? ».
ready was probably not an appropriated word. but after two months spent pretending that he was still laying next to you in bed every night, still texting you good morning every day, still sending you the dumbest memes at the most random times, it would have been a huge mistake to refuse osamu’s proposition.
and so he let him in. obviously, atsumu had orders from the doctors and his brother : don’t run, don’t move too fast, don’t speak too soon, don’t touch them without warning. but nobody had asked him not to cry. and how could his eyes stay dry when you looked so fragile and so vulnerable ?
osamu quietly left the room, leaving the two of you together not without apprehension. but if there was one thing he could trust his brother on, it was taking care of you. two months could not have gotten the better of four years of relationship.
but as much as he cared about you, atsumu had always been - and still was - pretty bad with words. and the first ones that left his mouth were a great example. « are you going to die ? » he asked in a shaky voice, brows knitted.
you would have given him an answer if you had one, but you didn’t. the doctors said that you had gone through the most painful part, but the risks of aggravations were still too important to let you go home. you were not 100% safe yet.
« i told you i’d wait » you spoke in a hoarse voice, the beep of your heart monitor getting a little bit faster.
the steps atsumu took towards you were slow, like he had been told, but just one glance at his eyes was enough to know that deep down, he was dying to feel your skin against his.
« i know you probably hate me right now. and for good reasons » he started as he sat on the chair next to your bed, still painfully avoiding any contact. « but there’s something i need to tell you, in case… in case… well, if something were to happen ».
his eyes lingered on your fingertips, blue and cold, and his whole body tensed at once. the thought that everything you were going through had been caused by his own selfishness was driving him crazy. but he had one last thing to keep himself grounded, and that thing was exactly what he was about to tell you.
« i love you. but i caused you so much trouble that i think there’s only one way to prove it… » he said, taking a deep breath before finally resting a timid hand on your arm. « i want to marry you. right now. i don’t fucking care if it’s not considered official, i just want you to know that leaving you was probably the biggest mistake i ever did. and that i’m not leaving ever again. so fuck it, let’s get married ! you almost died, life’s too short to plan a stupid ceremony ».
he stopped for a few seconds, panting from his teary monologue and paying attention to any beep or other sound that might indicate that he had made things worse for you. but it seemed like you were doing ok. how could you not be ? the love of your life had just proposed to you - sure, it wasn’t how you had imagined it, but wasn’t it even more beautiful like that ?
the tears that started rolling down your cheeks were undoubtedly tears of happiness and relief to know that, finally, your life was back to normal. atsumu was your normality, and for the first time in two months, you finally felt like you had a purpose. you had no idea if soulmates existed, but what you had with atsumu seemed more than close enough.
if someone had entered the room at that moment, it’d probably have taken them several minutes to understand what was going on. two young adults, crying yet smiling, one of them laying on a hospital bed looking like they had been through hell and back, and the other tearing off two pieces of his t-shirt and looking genuinely proud of himself - nothing about this made sense.
« my apologies, it was the easiest way to make us rings » atsumu chuckled, eyes still blurry as grabbed your hand in his with infinite tenderness. slowly, he tied the piece of cloth around your ring finger, loosely enough so that the doctors would not consider it dangerous for your blood circulation.
« i’m keeping that until you’re getting out of here. by my side. » he affirmed, pointing at his own makeshift ring before looking right into your eyes, as serious as ever. « and i’m also keeping you. forever. consider this my wedding vows »
as much as he hated to phrase it like that, you could both die in peace now.
i spent so much time on medical sites to be as accurate as i could, i felt like meredith mf grey for a few hours
@toworuu @catwithangerissues
#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu oneshot#haikyuu angst#miya atsumu#atsumu x reader#atsumu angst#miya atsumu x reader#atsumu one shot
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ok some thoughts after last night’s ep that i don’t want to make 100 individual posts for so i am just gonna write them all in one:
absolutely love how kara brags at lex constantly abt lena loving her more than him. she gets so cocky abt it too it’s like they’re having a little feud over who gets to keep lena and kara is obviously winning
absolutely love lillian luthor can i say. not only is brenda strong a total milf but i really do enjoy the complexity of her character. like she’s evil and abusive obvs but her underlying genuine care for lena makes that dynamic so interesting. plus the luthor family dynamic in general is so fucking good would watch a show focused on that ft the awkward family dinners that come from kara being lena’s wife lol
alex’s makeup is godawful and whoever decided on that look for her deserves to go to jail full stop. like tf were they doing w the eyebrows going to the bridge of her nose it’s so bad 😩 and if ur gonna give her a random blue braid at LEAST make it good otherwise don’t do it? hot take
brainia continues to be superior het ship. they really are adorable together & they’re both great characters so just in general they’re super likable together. going off of that the brainy/lena dynamic is also soooo good love to see two mentally ill ppl b mentally ill together!
i do enjoy how they all accepted lena back in so easily bc 1. the understanding that lena genuinely did not do what she did out of malice but rather out of hurt which doesn’t make it justifiable but does make it forgivable now that she’s back on track. lena deserves that after everything she’s been through. and 2. bc it really does show just how much kara loves her. like kara knew that whole time that lena was still good and for her to immediately trust her again shows that she truly did never give up on her and was just waiting for lena to come back so she could forgive her.
i absolutely love kelly & i wish they’d give her more screen time. she has such a calming presence to her which is so nice in an action show that’s always moving so fast. having her as the person in the superfriends to b like let’s all take a second and think if this is actually a good idea would b nice & her using her therapist skills whenever someone is having a breakdown too id love that. also she looked so good in that ep 😩
am still ambivalent towards andrea. just do not care for her character tbh. she’s not interesting or compelling to me at all. julie gonzalo is hot though! so at least there’s that.
i hope that kara being in the phantom zone makes them finally delve into kara’s trauma and past. i don’t want this to just b kara running from bad cgi dementors or whatever like i really hope this is character focused for her let melissa act!!!!!!
final note: this was honestly a really good episode for supercorp. it established that 1. kara still trusts lena more than almost anyone 2. that lena is ready to let go of her last name herself and to be the person that she has always wanted to be and that kara is her driving force and encouragement for that 3. that kara/lena is the second most important relationship of the show and in some cases even surpasses the kara/alex dynamic which is mind blowing 4. that lena is willing to and is going to fight for kara when no one else will and refuses to give up on her 5. that kara and lena’s relationship is on par w alex and kelly’s which. ok. not saying supercorp endgame but! at this point i do think that it could be a definite possibility 🙏
#michelle speaks#after the first like. 5 mins that was incredibly confusing i really enjoyed that ep! which is nice.
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I Know What You Did Last Summer
Part 1 | Part 2 Preview | Part 2
Summary: After a fun-filled graduation night, your heart is torn between your two best friends, Ten and Lucas. A fire is ignited between the three of you that isn’t as easy to calm as it was to start. And this lustful fire, just like any fire, spreads and seeks to destroy anything in its path, for there is no telling what Ten will do for you, or rather, to you.
Pairing: King!Ten x female reader (as well as Prince! Lucas)
Genre: Royalty!AU, love triangle, angst, smut, fluff
Warnings: manipulation, possessiveness, blackmail, cheating!, character death, mention of blood, mention of self-harm, alcohol use, smut!: threesome, unprotected sex, penetration (v and a), oral sex (m and f), hand job, fingering, fondling, c*eampie, biting, bdsm (paddle use, choking, rope use), orgasm denial, overstimulation, semi-public sex.
Word Count: 20.9k
Taglist: @suhweo @5shotsamericano @alreadyblondenow @khiphoptrash-0 @adorejaehyn @08skrr @ateez-babygirl @cherriesaries @suhfluffy @starlightdustsposts @agnessvaltersen @krispysun @montersloth @galadrielbeth @cafe-lectura @Jiyoungiejae @labelleetoilex3 @ceruleanskies @neo-cult-ure @goldensky @verasloggia @jaewalking @hhaechann @commentgirl @uwusofties @toffee-reads-and-writes @generalkpopwhore @kawaiimusiccollection @ainigmatikos-posts @kkuljungwoo @kaiwatabe
A/N: PART TWO is HERE!! Thank you all for your support for part 1!! We appreciate it so much! We hope you enjoy part two, the finale to this adventure. We are so excited, once again, for you guys to see what happens! We had so much fun writing this and would love your feedback💕
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[JANUARY 1896]
It’s the night of the Chinese festival. Kids run about the town as folks put up their decorations and line up delicious and colorful foods for all that walk by. The air is light, with everyone laughing and talking as they enjoy each other’s company.
Friends meet from all over the land, as all kingdoms come together to celebrate the turn of the new year.
You’re dressed in a beautiful red dress with gold adornments, leaving Ten’s mouth agape once he opens the door of carriage to help you out. Seeing you in your bright and dazzling outfit under the lantern lights makes his heart flutter. Your gold eye shadow brings out the depth of color in your eyes, the ones that looked around nervously.
“You look amazing, my love.” Ten states as you take his hand and fall onto his chest lightly.
He gives you a light peck on the cheek, but you move away and let go of his hand soon after, hoping that you didn’t move too quickly while in front of the other attendees.
The last thing you wanted was for everyone to be able to see or even speculate that your marriage was in trouble.
You walk slightly ahead and force a smile to the onlookers.
“Hello, hello.” You say to everyone that bows while standing poised with both hands in front.
Ten also forces an awkward smile as he is left behind.
You look over the crowd, hoping to catch a glimpse of the tall man that neglected to speak to you for the last few months. Oh, how you missed him and his letters. You missed his warmth, for Ten’s coldness only grew to annoy you more and more as your time together increased.
You start to frown slowly, but in an instant, you see his bright smile. He holds Rosé’s hand and reaches for a lantern from a store owner. He hands the beautifully detailed lantern to her with the brightest smile on his face and wide eyes.
You heart begins to shatter. You wished you could have that moment with him, you wished you could be the one to kiss him when the fireworks went off later that night. Rosé was so lucky, she had no idea.
Ten quickly steps forward and takes your arm into his hand from behind, guiding you to the left and distracting you.
He knew you had spotted Lucas so he took you away as fast as he could.
“This way, honey.”
You and Ten enjoy some of the food provided by local chefs. It’s the finest food you’ve ever had, as they worked diligently to provide for you two, the highest royals in the land.
But you can’t focus on the flavors, you still think of Lucas’ face. Even with the loud drums and strings that play throughout your entertaining dinner set, you can only see his smile.
“What’s wrong? Are you displeased? Waiter! This food is no good! Can’t you see how upset my wife-?” Ten waves over the servant.
“Ten! No! It’s great, amazing actually.” You put your hand over his and turned to him, your eyes big as you try to stop him.
“It’s fine, calm down..please.” You whisper to him.
Ten frowns. “Then what’s wrong? You look like you’re unhappy. It’s not good for us or for the people.”
“It’s nothing..I was just lost in thought Ten, I’m sorry.”
“No need to apologize, sweetheart..I love you.” He forced a smile and brought his fingers to your chin. A moment passes when you look into each other’s eyes.
His calm demeanor shifts at your hesitancy.
“Do—you love me?”
“Of course..” you turn your head away from him and look back at your food.
“Then say it.” He holds your chin again, this time placing his thumb on it to bring your attention back to him with a little more force.
His eyes are dark, his tone is low as he speaks through gritted teeth.
“I—have to go to the ladies room.” You stand up instantly.
Ten exhales loudly. “Seulgi! Please escort our Queen to the nearest bathroom.”
Seulgi walks up to you and quickly places her hand around your arm to guide you, but you pull it away.
“I don’t need..your assistance. I’m not a child.” You look from her and back to Ten, who knew what he was doing. He wanted her to watch you and make sure that you don’t find Lucas.
“You look a little ill, darling. She’ll go with you to make sure you don’t fall out. I know you and corsets don’t exactly get along.” Ten flashes a small smile when he sees your look of disbelief and nods towards Seulgi.
You turn to leave but Ten calls you again.
“Oh, and my love..”
You turn back to him.
“Yes, Ten?”
“Hurry back before the fireworks.” he winks and takes a sip of his wine.
The two of you walk slowly to the bathroom as you think of a way to escape her. That’s when you see a dance going on between a group of teenagers. They hold hands and move in a tightly knit circle around a large dragon.
You take this as your opportunity to scurry away from Seulgi, ducking under the joined arms quickly and putting yourself by the large dragon in the center.
The immense dragon spins around quickly and moves up and down to the music and cheering.
“Your majesty!” You hear her call out, but you duck again and shimmy around the dancers.
When you look behind you, you see that she’s looking for you on the opposite side of the circle so you run underneath the linked arms again and away from her.
About five steps away, a store owner hands out decorated dragon masks, so you swiftly grab one and bow.
You place it onto your face by pulling the string around your head. Luckily for you, the town is crowded with thousands of people so you’re able to slip away and into any corners without anyone really noticing you, the Queen.
You walk around, searching for Lucas while avoiding Ten, Seulgi, and the rest of the servants. It’s difficult to breathe behind your mask, but you’re not focused on that, you’re focused on finding him.
You eventually see what looks to be the back of Rosé’s head, but you don’t see her giant counterpart. So you step closer.
Suddenly, you’re snatched up by the arm and dragged into a dark alleyway.
Shit.
“Hey!” You yell as the large hand squeezes you.
You try to identify the man but he wears a mask similar to your own.
“How dare you hold me, the Queen, like this? Unhand me right now!” You have a fit as you believe that it’s one of Ten’s men that has dared to touch you.
“Shhh!!” The man pushes you into the wall and tears his mask off.
Your heart drops when you recognize the beautiful brown eyes that look into your own deeply.
You take your mask off slowly and stare at him for a moment. He bends down towards you, keeping you locked in between his strong arms with his hands placed flat against the wall.
“Lucas..where have you been? Why have you been ignoring me? Wait, how did you even know it was me?”
“Shhh..just kiss me.” He leans down and places his lips onto yours, drawing you into a kiss full of passion and longing.
His tongue traces over your bottom lip as you lean into him more.
You wrap your arms around his waist to pull him closer to you, your shoulders raising as your eyes shut.
His face leaves yours, steamy breath decorating your bottom lip as he looks into your eyes.
“Lucas..that’s not enough..you ignored me.” You lick your lips.
Lucas still stares at your lips. “What do you want me to do, y/n?”
“I want you to write letters to me..tell me..”
“Tell you what?”
“Tell me..you love me” you look into his eyes as your heart races because of his close proximity.
“I could write a million letters proclaiming my love for you, y/n. But it wouldn’t matter. You still belong to him. We aren’t meant to be together, can’t you see?”
“I..I don’t care. I need you, no matter what happens, I’ll always need you.” You hold the side of his face as you whisper.
“Please..y/n. I love you, but we can’t do this anymore. One of us will get hurt.” Lucas pleads, but looks out to the side, carefully watching for anyone that walks by and peaks in. He looked worried, like he was contemplating spending any time with you.
And the truth is, he was worried especially after Hendery’s threatening visit. Hendery topped it off with a challenging duel to assert his devotion to the King, but as hard as Hendery fought, Lucas overpowered him. Nonetheless, Lucas wouldn’t tell you this as he wouldn’t want you to worry.
“It’s best that we stop this.” He exhales.
But you want him so badly. You want to feel him hold you in his arms again. You want that feeling of sunshine running through your veins as you make pure love.
“Fine. But first put my heart at ease, Lucas, don’t just ignore me. Look at me and tell me you don’t care, tell me you don’t love me and that you want this to end. Tell me that your heart does not tremble as mine does when I’m with you.”
He turns to you and looks into your eyes, his mouth falling open but no sound comes out.
He shakes his head slowly and closes his eyes while sighing. “You know I can’t do that.”
So you kiss him again. Your arms circling around his neck this time as you press your lips into his hard. Your teeth clash as the kiss becomes messier, your lips becoming red.
The two of you kissed as a feeling of frustration filled your bodies. You couldn’t be together honestly, yet you couldn’t be away from each other. Lucas tried to ignore you unsuccessfully. It tore him apart when he had to stop writing letters to you. He tried to distract himself by hunting and fulfilling his duties, and by being a good husband to Rosé and giving her happy nights. But at the end of it all, he always missed you.
Lucas stopped the kiss, pulling away to look into your eyes filled with tears.
“I missed you.” He says before giving you the softest smile.
You feel your face become hot. “I missed-“
“Has anyone seen the Queen?!” You hear a man shout.
“Put your mask back on.”
He states before putting his on.
“W-what?”
Lucas only takes your mask out of your hand and places it onto your face then tying it for you.
He takes your hand and leads you out of the alleyway.
“Hold your head down.”
You both hurry past the crowds, working your way to wherever Lucas was taking you.
People gather to the river where they will get the best view of the firework celebration that is to happen soon.
But the two of you move in the opposite direction.
After about 10 minutes of brushing past hundreds of people and into an empty area outside of the market, you finally reach a gazebo.
It just the two of you there, everyone has gathered over a thousand feet away and towards the river where music is playing while people cheer and dance.
Lucas tears his mask off and sits down onto the bench in the gazebo. You take your mask off too as he holds your waist and brings you down onto his lap.
You resume your kiss, breathing heavily as your body moves back and forth onto his growing bulge.
He reaches under the many layers of your dress, laughing out as he struggles to find your thighs.
“I know..it’s a lot.” You laugh.
He smiles widely. “But it’s beautiful...you’re beautiful.” He looks into your eyes while pressing his fingers onto your slit.
You hiss at the contact, your hips instantly moving faster.
He fixes his pants down his legs as you lift yourself up slightly. His free cock now presses against the skin of your inner thigh. You wish you could see it or even touch it, but you had to move fast. Surely, Ten and his men would be combing through the crowds now looking for you or even Lucas.
“Fuck.” Lucas whispers through a staggered breath as you lower yourself onto him.
You kiss him hard as you grind down on him, his fingers gripping your legs hard, pressing into the soft skin.
He licks your neck and kisses it softly, careful not to leave any marks. He would tear your dress off and decorate every part of you with kisses if he had his way, but he knew it was impossible for tonight.
Just being close to you for this moment was enough. Red made you look gorgeous and the night lights and makeup you wore made you look like an angel that graced the earth.
You moved up and down faster, your mouth falling open as that familiar feeling started to return.
Lucas brought his hands onto your ass now, pushing himself deeper and deeper into you as you cried out.
“Shhh.” He tried to shush you as your moaning grew louder. No one was close by, and the commotion would’ve covered any noises the two of you made but he had to be sure.
He grunted into your ear, his teeth lightly grazing your neck as he also got closer, his pre-cum spilling into you.
He places two fingers onto your clit, rubbing it slowly. Your chest falls and you can’t hold back any longer.
“Yes..” you cry out, moving faster. Some of your hair falls out of your bun, you can’t form coherent sentences as Lucas dick commands your wet flower, pushing against your sweet spot repeatedly.
You begin to make out again, your lips covered in spit as your tongues dance.
“Lucas!” You moan loudly, but the sound of the fireworks booming through the night sky covers your noise.
Your eyes shut tightly.
He curses as he releases into your trembling body, holding you down onto his hips.
The fireworks still blow up and out into the sky while you relax.
Your heart rate normalizes and you pick yourself off of him. You sit beside him, legs weak and chest still heavy.
He fixes his pants and clears his throat.
“I love you, y/n. I love you so much. I would never abandon you.”
Lucas contemplated telling you about Ten’s demanding letter, but it wasn’t the right time.
“We must be careful, should we continue.”
You smile and kiss him once more. Nothing mattered in that moment. You just wanted to enjoy the fireworks with him, for you knew that the fireworks were meant to bring good luck to any couples that stood beside each other as they went off to bring in the new year.
Maybe you would receive a blessing. Maybe..the two of you could end up together.
After several minutes of enjoying each other’s company, you both decided to head back to your spouses, departing in opposite directions.
You made sure to wipe yourself clean in a restroom, then fix your lipstick and hair before heading out towards your carriage.
People started to disperse as the celebrations calm down after the fireworks. They made their way back to their own carriages, smiling and laughing, but you heard a commotion as you got closer to your grand carriage.
You flinched as you heard a screeching scream. You picked your dress up and walked faster, your smile fading from your face.
“What’s going on?” You asked a man in the crowd that circled around your carriage.
“Oh!...your majesty, excuse me.” The man stepped out fo your way as did several other men that stood in front.
You heard the thunderous crack of a whip and another screech followed by a woman crying.
You looked closer and saw that someone kneeled on the ground, their back was naked and littered with red slash marks.
“Oh no..” you ran forward when you saw Ten watch as one of his men pulled his arm back to deliver yet another blow to the poor girl.
Your eyes widened when you saw who the person being attacked was.
Seulgi.
“Stop!” You threw your body over hers before the man could whip her once more.
“Halt!” Ten called to stop the man.
“And there she is..” Ten says softly, a smile creeping across his face as he watches you hold Seulgi, her blood staining your expensive dress.
You start to cry, looking into her cherry-red face wet with tears. “I’m so sorry, please forgive me.”
“What are you apologizing for? She’s the one that’s incompetent and cannot complete a simple task for her king.” Ten raises an eyebrow.
You become furious. He took his madness out on someone innocent and in front of many people. He humiliated and hurt her all because they could not find you.
You snap your head up to look at him through angry eyes. “Have you lost your fucking mind?”
The crowd gasps and Ten’s eyes grow, but his face still displays an evil smile.
“How dare you talk to your king like that!” You hear his mother yell.
“You wretch! You should be punished!” She steps forward.
“Mother..calm down..shes our Queen after all. She’s allowed to express herself.” Ten speaks calmly.
He walks over to you and crouches down.
You hold Seulgi tight, covering her body as she sobs into her hands.
“It’s my fault, your majesty, I shouldn’t have abandoned you. I failed you, please, I must receive the lashings as punishment for my incompetence.” She says in between sniffles, her body shaking out of fear and immense pain from her burning wounds.
Your heart breaks at the sight, you’re the cause of all this. You were the one that abandoned her. “No..no, it’s not your fault, I was the one that slipped away, I was the one that lost you. I’m so sorry.”
“Go away!” You yell out at the people that still crowd you and watch the drama unravel.
They quickly disperse into all directions and leave.
“And where exactly did you slip away to for all that time, y/n?” Ten turns to you.
“I got lost, there’s thousands of people here, Ten..but how could you do this?”
“And what about Lucas?”
You look up at him slowly, a moment resting between his question and your answer, but you are quickly interrupted by a soft voice.
“He was with me, your majesty.” Rosé walks quickly towards the three of you, Lucas following behind.
She lied to protect you, or rather, to protect Lucas.
Ten stands up straight and looks past Rosé and onto Lucas.
“That’s good to hear..it seems he understands the importance of being beside one’s spouse once the fireworks light up the sky on this special night.”
Ten smirks and turns back to you. “Get up, we have business to tend to back home.”
You obey his order as to not piss him off any more. You don’t dare spare a glance to Lucas but you can feel his eyes on you, how sorrowful they must look.
“Irene! Get her cleaned up and out of my sight!” Ten says before squeezing your arm and taking you to the carriage.
He helps you inside and sits beside you before the two of you endure a long and silent drive back home.
Once you get back home, Ten takes your arm and practically throws you inside. You quickly turn to him and close your fists tightly.
He pushes you into the wall, pressing his body into yours. “Do you take me for a fool? Huh?! After all this time, do you think I’m just some foolish schoolboy still?”
“I think you’re crazy! Wait, no, I KNOW you’re crazy!”
He takes your jaw into his hand and brings his lips to yours, forcing a kiss onto them.
You slap him and watch as he backs away.
“You expect me to love you after that? You embarrassed an innocent woman, Ten! And on the night of the Chinese festival of all nights, how can I love you?! You keep me caged like some kind of animal! I can’t take it anymore!”
Ten rubs the spot you slapped him and grows furious, fire roaring through his veins.
“You were supposed to come back to me! We were supposed to kiss as we bring in the new year together!”
“I’m sorry I couldn’t find my way back, but you have to understand, I didn’t do it on purpose. It was an accident.”
“I know what it is..” Ten exhales and walks around the foyer.
“I’ve been too lenient, I’ve been too giving. I am not a king, I am a weak fool that falls for the same person over and over. The person that never stops taking advantage. The person who I just can’t say no too.”
“Ten..” you shake your head.
“But I know what I’ll do..I’ll release you..I’ll let you go, like the caged bird you feel like you are. You will be free.” Ten swallows hard..he walks into the guest room and sits down. You follow him and watch as he pours himself a glass of scotch.
“You will no longer be Queen, you can leave me..”
Could Ten possibly be letting you go? Could you be with Lucas after all?
You sit down on the chair adjacent to his.
Ten gives you a moment to protest, but once you don’t, he begins to grow angry again. He thinks that you do in fact want to be free from him since you do not call him a fool for saying such outrageous things. He knew he’d never let you go, but seeing your eyes grow with hope made him irritated.
“You can be relinquished of all royal titles and live as a beggar, you’ll never see your family again, but that wouldn’t matter, right? Just as long as you have Lucas..”
Your eyes flicker up to him.
“Ten..”
“But poor Lucas and his family, they’d have to live and eventually, die in poverty..hmmm so sad.” Ten downs the liquid and slams the glass onto the table. He gives you a sarcastic smile.
“I...despise you, Ten.” You stand up and head for the door, but Ten rushes after you spinning you around before grabbing a fistful of your hair.
His lips smash into yours once more as his hand pulls your hair pin out, your hair falling loose.
You kiss him back, biting his lips on purpose but not pushing him away as you did before.
He bites into your neck as he listens to you whine. Your hands scrape at his back, scratching him through his shirt as he groans.
He breaks the kiss off and tears away the fabric of your dress, revealing your breasts and exposing them to the cold air.
“Do you want to know what I was thinking when I watched her be punished?”
“What?” You say before he sucks your nipple as the two of you stand in the foyer, angrily embracing each other.
“How badly I want to punish you in ways you’ve never been punished before..”
Ten flips you around, pushing you into the wall so your back is against his chest.
He kisses you from behind, but quickly bites into your shoulder while grabbing your hair and pulling back roughly.
“And the way you spoke to me in front of all those people..that was the icing on the cake, sweetheart.” Ten’s gravelly voice enters your ear.
He unlaces your corset and slides down what’s left of your dress with one hand while his other hand holds both wrists tightly and over your head.
He then presses his fingers onto your clit, immediately rubbing circles into it as you cry out his name.
He bites harder into your shoulders, breaking the skin to draw blood.
“Fuck!” You moan at the mixture of pain and pleasure.
He fingers you as his cock presses against your ass, your head falls back, you close your eyes and focus on the way his fingers stretch you out so wonderfully.
Ten pinches your nipple with his other hand, but continues to suck hard onto you shoulder.
Your essence runs down your wavering legs. You can’t think or even speak straight.
“Yes..T-Ten..right..there.”
You’re so close, you clench around him but he takes his fingers out and spins you around to face him.
“Did you really think it would be that easy?”
He kneels and gives you a smirk as he looks up at your disappointed face.
Ten was never like this, he always made sure you came no matter what, but now he was denying you.
You lock eyes as he sucks his fingers clean.
“You’re cruel.” You whimper.
He chuckles and runs a hand down your abdomen, adoring your soft skin and the way you fidget.
“Oh, you have no idea.I’ll show you crazy, my darling. Yes, tonight, I’ll drive you mad, just as mad as you’ve made me.”
He holds your legs by the crook of your knees and places them over his shoulders, his head now in between them and hot breath fanning over your soaking entrance.
He licks slowly as he watches you moan.
Your hand goes to the back of his head, and runs through his hair.
“Oh, my love. I would be a fool to let such a sweet thing go.” Ten whispers then licks in between your folds.
His kitten licks drive you crazy, you can’t help but grab onto his hair tighter.
“Please Ten..”
But he continues to go slow, watching you above him as you play with your nipple and mutter out curse words. He won’t push in further, but he allows the tip of his nose to tickle your bud.
He flattens his tongue, working his way past your folds as you shake.
You’re needy to the point of tears, but Ten doesn’t budge.
“Oh fuck.. let me cum please.” You whine again.
He finally dips his tongue in, swirling it around as he kisses your slit. You move your hips against his face, feeling the bridge of his nose press onto your bud.
“Yes..” your head falls back.
Ten applies pressure to that one spot he knows will make you go crazy, and just as you’re about to cum he pulls his face away from your pussy, kissing your thigh while your chest falls.
“You don’t deserve to cum.”
He yanks your arm and drags you upstairs to the bedroom.
“Do you..remember..the first night we fucked sweetheart?”
“How could I forget?” You breathlessly let out, your legs still weak from being close to your climax not once, but twice.
“The safe word..what was it?? Ah yes, gold.” Ten pushes you onto the bed.
“On your stomach, hands behind your back.” You turn over as he demands, your ass up and ready, but little do you know what Ten has planned for you.
Ten takes silk rope that was placed inside
the nightstand and ties both of your wrists together.
You squeal as he tightens it so tight, you know that you won’t be able to shimmy out of it if you tried.
Ten holds the back of your neck as he leans down to whisper into your ear.
“Ass up at all times, if you falter, you’ll be like this all night.”
You nod. You’d do anything to cum at this point.
Ten then ties two silk ropes around your ankles, each rope leading to your wrists. You can no longer separate your legs from your arms. You’re open for him and restricted, unable to close your legs or move your arms. The ropes are right, you can feel the blood pressure increases, but a part of you likes it.
The image of Ten over your bound body only makes you ache for a release even more. You want to feel him inside you, running his veiny cock against your walls.
Ten rubs his hand over your ass teasingly, just barely touching it to trace the roundness of it.
He pulls his pants down and pushes into you in one swift move, you can’t adjust in time and whine loudly at the sudden penetration.
Your body falls forward, but he grips your wrists and brings you back to him, grunting as he reaches your depths and runs his length along your soothing walls.
“Ahh!! Ten!” You scream as he pushes into you again, ramming his dick into.
“Don’t be so surprised, sweetheart, I told you I would punish you. But you’re so fucking wet, I’m beginning to think you’re enjoying this.”
Ten pulls out slowly, groaning at the way you clench and twitch around his length.
Your feet and hands go numb, the tight rope digging into your skin to leave a mark.
“You look so pretty like this, all tied up for me. If i could have you like this all the time, I’d be overjoyed.”
Ten growls then slams into you once again, this time, letting your body fall onto the bed while you moan.
He pulls you by your hair and whispers into your ear, pinching your nipples so your eyes fly open.
“I hope it’s not too much for you.” He states in a mocking tone.
He pushes your head forward into the bed again, drilling into your body as his skilled hips fail to miss a beat.
The sounds of skin against skin and your moans fill the air, making you feel weak. The tingly feeling in your stomach just begging to be eased.
“Ten..please..I’m almost-“ you say through staggered breaths.
“I’m gonna..”
“Do you want to end up like Seulgi? Don’t you dare cum without my approval.” He growls and moves even faster.
It’s hard to hold back, but you’re not exactly sure what Ten is capable of anymore. You follow his orders as tears run down your cheeks. You bite your lips and try not to cum as he coats your walls with his own essence and holds you fast against him.
He pants and lays his body on top of yours.
He pulls out, but replaces his dick with his fingers, pushing the cum that has leaked out back into you.
He looks at the side of your face as he fingers you, looking into your eyes before giving your cheeks a light peck. His hair has fallen into his face, his exposed shoulders shining in the dimly lit room with sweat. He’s incredibly gorgeous, even when he’s angry.
“Don’t cry, sweetheart. A king never disappoints his obedient queen at the end of it all.”
Obedient being the key word.
“Ten..baby, please.”
“Shhh...it’s too late to beg, stay here.”
Ten leaves the room, your body still on the bed, aching in your strenuous position.
He comes back in not too long after, however, retaking his position behind you.
“Ahhhh..my beautiful queen, how will I let the world...” he takes a breath before continuing, traces of sarcasm echoing in his tone. “And any other man..know that you are mine?”
You breathe heavily.
Then feel a sharp slap to your butt. A wooden paddle sends you into the bed, your voice letting out a crackling cry at the unexpected hit.
“No..no..keep your body up, sweetheart.” He puts his arm under you and brings your body back to its original position.
He then smacks you again, but with less force.
“See? Here I go, going easy on you again.”
Another smack, you shut your eyes tightly and feel your slick run down your legs.
“Look at you..getting turned on by this.” He swings the paddle onto you again, but with as much force as he did the first time.
He grabs you by your hair before you can crash into the bed.
“Oh my god, Ten!” You cry out.
He slaps you again.
“There we go..now we are getting the reaction that we need..your skin is magnificent, especially in this bruised tone.”
You sob, but you won’t give him the satisfaction of saying the safe word.
He delivers another blow as you yelp.
He becomes hard again at the sight of your entrance dripping and ass irritated.
He moves behind you and places the paddle down. His fingernails dig into your hips as he drags your ass towards him, this time he pushes into your asshole slowly.
“Ten!”
He grunts then pushes into you all the way. “So tight. Just like the first night.”
He moves in and out at a steady pace, your breath leaving you with each thrust. You whimper and struggle against your restraints, but he feels amazing, you don’t want him to stop.
He leans forwards and pushes two fingers into your mouth, his hips increasing in speed.
“Ahhh..fuck.” Strings of cum enter you once again.
That night, Ten teased you endlessly, playing with your body like it was a toy for a spoiled child on Christmas. Keeping it in weird positions as he fucked into you over and over. Choking you while denying you of release, your makeup was smudged and messy as you cried from over-sensitivity. He took his frustrations out on you all night and you wondered how he was still so energetic.
And when he finally let you experience your long awaited orgasm, your hands loose and scratching at his back, your ankles over his shoulders as he pushes into you from above and kisses your lips like he needs them to survive. You came hard, your eyes rolling into the back of your head. Shortly after, you fell asleep as he cleaned you up.
The next day, you couldn’t walk. Your bum, wrists and ankles were littered with painful bruises. Your neck and chest also had too many love bites for you to count. It was safe to say you’d be in the house for a while. No one could see you like this.
Your eyes squint as the sunlight burns through the thin curtains.
Ten walks into the room. “Good morning.”
He gives a small smile then scoops you off of the bed.
“W-where-?” You rub your eyes.
“Is a man not allowed to take his wife to the bath?” Ten looks onto you with furrowed brows.
He places you down into the bath filled with water and rose petals. Usually, your maids helped you bathe while Ten was out of the room, but here Ten was being the caring husband he should be.
“That was the hardest I’ve ever gone, darling. You are clearly fit to be my wife after all.” He says as he washes you down. He sits on the side of the tub and massages your body with warm water, and expensive soap he created far away in the mountains just for you.
You moan and bite your lips. His touch is soothing, his hands move over your breasts and your abdomen slowly, and soon, the apex of your legs.
“Ten-“ you draw in a sharp breath.
“Yes, sweetheart?”
“Join me..please.”
And so he joins you in the oversized, luxurious tub, making love to you once more as water splashes onto the floor, your legs around his waist, your hands running along his soft back. Ten moans as he feels your fingers delicately trace over the scratch marks you gave him last night.
“I’m so happy you’re mine.” He whispers as you drift into sleep again.
————
[MARCH 1896]
Ten holds your hand tightly as the two of you walk into a tea shop.
The store owner immediately bows to both of you. “Your majesty, welcome! Allow me to provide you with the finest tea in the land. I would’ve been more prepared had I known of your visit, I do apologize.”
“No need to apologize, thank you for welcoming us.” You cut in before Ten can make a snarky comment like he always did to people below him.
The two of you sat down to enjoy delicious tea from all over the world. Some spicy, some incredibly sweet, and some so refreshing, it felt like you were drinking liquid happiness.
“Which ones do you prefer, my love?” Ten turns to you as you wipe your mouth with a napkin.
“I like..the Wuyi Narcissus..” you breathlessly let out, suddenly becoming weak and dizzy. Your heart beats rapidly, almost like it’s threatening to burst through the cage it’s in.
Blood rushes to your head as you lean over, your vision blurring and hands releasing the tea cup you held.
A crash sounds as the fine china splatters all over the floor, a commotion follows.
“Y/n? Y/n! What have you done to her?!” Ten holds your body and shakes you lightly, but you’ve already passed out completely.
Later that day, you wake to find yourself laying on your shared bed. Your eyes flutter open to see a man with glasses and a small smile over you.
“I don’t care if no one has ever been sickened by his tea before, I want that man dead by sunset!” Ten yells outside of the room.
“What-what happened?” You ask the man that seems to have just taken your temperature.
“Sweetheart! You’re okay..” Ten rushes over beside you.
“I promise that man will not see another morning for hurting you like this.”
“Ten..what are you talking about?” You still feel very weak, your hands and feet are numb.
“Bring him in!” Ten yells outside of the room.
Two guards drag the tea shop owner inside your bed room and make him kneel at the foot of your bed by kicking the crook of his knees.
“Ahh! Your majesty, I did not poison you! I swear by it! I would never-“ the old man cries, his eyes are bruised, swollen and blood runs from the corner of his mouth.
“Shut up!” Ten slaps the man hard with the back of his hand, making him fall forward and cry louder.
“Ten!” You cry out and reach for him.
“Please..please don’t.” Youre voice is barely above a whisper as you still struggle to breathe normally.
“this bastard poisoned you!”
Ten walked back towards you.
“Actually, that may not be the case.. your majesty, now that you are awake, may I ask you a question?” The man with the glasses beside your bed cuts in.
“My name is Kun Qian, I am the royal family’s physician.”
“Hello, Doctor. Yes, you may ask me anything.”
“When was the last time you experienced menstruation?”
Your eyes widened at the doctor asking such a private question, but then you really thought about it. You hadn’t seen your period for some time.
“It-it’s been quite a while, doctor.” You look up at him and nod your head.
“As I suspected, based on your temperature and low blood pressure, it seems as though you are pregnant.” He gives you a smile and looks back at Ten.
“A heir is on the way!”
Your mouth falls open as anguish covers your entire body. You weren’t ready to be a mother, you didn’t think you could even carry a baby. Hell, it was only the first few days or so and you had already fainted.
Your brows are knitted as you stare at the doctor, then look back at Ten.
He smiles from ear to ear, then leans down to pull you into a big hug.
“My love! We are going to have a baby!” He exclaims then pulls away to see your reaction. You still look dumbfounded, clearly not as excited as he is.
Ten frowns slightly, then turns back to the men in the room.
“Leave us!” He yells and they quickly scurry out of the room.
He turns back to you. “Well, don’t look so thrilled, sweetheart.” A sarcastic smirk falling over his face now that the room is empty.
“I..I am excited..I’m just nervous.”
“Please don’t worry, my love..” he rubs a hand slowly on top of the blanket covering your belly.
“I will ensure that you receive the best care throughout this pregnancy and after. As well as our dear child. They will be the most spoiled baby on Earth. Do you trust me?”
The answer was no. Ten was aggressive sometimes and words were just words. You weren’t sure what he was capable of.
“Darling?”
“Y-yes..I do.” You nod, and give him a reassuring smile to ease his concern.
“I would like to rest now, Ten.”
Ten nods before kissing your hand and leaving the room. He felt like he was on cloud 9, he ran through the house like a child that was just gifted a dog to chase and play with.
You rested your head onto your pillow and stared at the ceiling, thinking all sorts of things.
The night of the Chinese Festival..it had to have been then.
But which man was the father of the baby growing in you?
Ten believed it was his, but you weren’t sure, for little did he know, you too had been unfaithful.
————
[MAY 1896]
You sit and have tea with Ten’s mother.
“How do you feel?” She asks, faking concern.
“Well..I’ve had better days.”
She sighs and takes a sip from her cup.
“I don’t understand what my son sees in you. You can barely handle a pregnancy, how can you handle a nation of needy people?”
“You’ve said that before. How do you expect me to react?”
“I don’t expect anything from a weak girl like you, I know I’d only be setting myself up for disappointment. You came into his life out of nowhere. Your family barely has a respectable lineage. He could’ve gone with someone like that gorgeous Yoona from the Im Estate. But instead...he’s fascinated with you. And why? I’ll never understand.” She shakes her head.
You place your tea cup down loudly and exhale. “Why do you hate me so much, mother?” You say with venom in your tone. You’ve just about had enough with her for she always treats you like you’re less than Ten. She practically threw her hatred in your face since the day you met her.
“Oh, is it that obvious?” She chuckles then takes another sip.
“Well, quite frankly, y/n..I knew you were a lustful wretch from the minute I met you by the look in your eyes..even at your young age, I knew you wanted to corrupt my son, my baby. I knew you were gonna enslave him with your body, taint him and make him forget all that he’d learned.” She spits out while leaning forward.
You stare blankly and look at the table, trying to calm your nerves.
“You’re a whore, y/n, and I just know you fucked that fool, Lucas. That mistake of a man that was birthed by a disgusting prostitute. She threw herself onto my husband in order to take his money. And you’ve done the same to my naive Ten because you are just like her..a whore.”
You chuckle and leaned forward as you remembered catching her son all those times, in the stables, in the library.
“The only whore in this house is your son! He’s just like his father, your cheating bastard of a husband. All he does is stick his penis into anything with a heartbeat! And yet the King ended up with you! A hateful and downright evil bitch! Bless him for being relieved of your presence finally in death!” You lash out.
The queen backhand smacks you so hard, you placed your hands flat onto the table to hold yourself up straight.
The queen gasps and shoots up from her chair. She huffs. “If you ever dare open your foul mouth and speak to me like that again, I’ll see to it that your tongue is removed and fed to the wolves! I can’t kill you, for your death would ruin my son, but I will hurt you, child. Do not..mess with me.”
Seulgi runs over and helps you up from the table after the queen leaves.
Your back aches in pain as you stand up from the dining room table. You press your hand into the small of it and wince.
Your belly was so huge, you couldn’t even walk 10 steps without the need to stop and take a breath.
“I believe you should rest in your room, your majesty.” A maid helps you up the stairs and towards your bedroom. She was the one to always hold your hand and help you through any cramps you felt. You rarely saw Ten. He was always away for some trip or completing tasks in town, writing orders, or even hunting with other men.
You found it quite odd that he promised to give you the best treatment, but neglected to even check in with you on some days.
“Where..is my husband, Seulgi?” You move up the steps slowly.
“I-I am not sure, Miss, I believe he is out of town at the moment.”
You sigh. “Of course he is.”
“A letter came for you today, your majesty, I have placed it onto the desk in your study.” Seulgi changes the subject quickly, for she knows of Ten’s true whereabouts. She knows that he is actually in the very same castle that you’re in, only, he rests in a room far away on the other end of the large mansion, laying in bed with his favorite servant, Jade.
She knew that your pregnancy would be in danger if you ever discovered this.
“I would like to go there now, I will rest later.” You tell her. You put Seulgi in charge of collecting letters and hiding the ones that were closed shut with a distinct label. She didn’t know who the letters were from, but even if she had her own assumptions, you knew you could trust her of all the maids to stay quiet.
“Yes, your majesty.”
Once in the study alone, you open the letter from your beloved Lucas.
Your mouth widens into a smile as you read it and rub your irritated cheek.
Dear y/n,
I am delighted to know that you are doing well. Please continue to rest, eat, and sleep well. I wish I could be there to hold you and feel the subtle kicks of our child. I can imagine how cute it will be already, with your beautiful eyes and my dimples. The baby is so loved , it does not even know. We will provide it with everything that it needs and more. It will have the most caring parents known to man. Once the delivery is successful, I will pick you up and we will run away from this place together, raising our child in the sunniest place for the rest our lives. We will finally be together, my love. All three of us. I promise to see you soon.
Yours Always,
Lucas
A tears drops onto the paper. Your heart swells with joy when you think of finally living your life with your true love, Lucas. Carrying a baby was painful, but knowing that he loved you and planned to take care of you made it easier.
You wouldn’t have to deal with your careless, self-centered husband, you could finally be happy.
You clutched the letter to your chest and brought it with you to your room, holding it tightly as you fell asleep with a smile on your face.
————
[One Day Later]
“Your majesty...” Jade rushes into Ten’s study.
“What are you doing?! You know we can’t meet here!” Ten quickly stands up and walks close to Jade.
With shakey hands she lifts up a piece of paper to him.
“I am so sorry, your majesty, but I was cleaning the Queen’s quarters when I came across this letter. It was under one of the pillows on the bed!”
“Shhh..quiet down, you’ll wake her.”
Ten grabs the paper from her and looks into her eyes sternly. “And what gives you the right to read through our Queen’s personal documents, Jade?”
“I-I’m sorry, but I couldn’t help but recognize the name at the bottom.”
Ten raises an eyebrow, but then proceeds to read through the note.
His face grows angry, his grip on the paper tightens as his knuckles become white as snow.
‘Our son.’
The audacity of this man. Ten thinks to himself.
“How dare he..” Ten scoffs, he begins to lose it slowly, he can’t even form coherent sentences or words to express how upset he is. So many thoughts run through his head. Had you and Lucas really fornicated that night when you disappeared at the festival?
Lucas wouldn’t be a fool to call the baby his child if this wasn’t the truth, for this was the only time that you had slipped out of Ten’s sight.
How dare he. Ten thought Lucas would’ve stopped it all. He thought he would’ve been a decent friend and left you alone like he asked, but he disobeyed his order and still continued to keep in touch with you.
How dare you. Oh you...you lied to him. His sweetheart, the one he loved so dearly with all his heart. He gave you everything, the world, and anything else that you could possibly ask for. You took advantage of his kindness, you took him for a fool once again.
And the worst part is, he still loved you. You could stab him in the chest with a sword while daunting an ice cold expression, and he’d still adore you.
And the fact that the two of you planned to run away together made everything worse. The child that he was so excited to welcome and raise into the world with you, would be snatched away from him by his own best friend.
He doubted that even being murdered by you was worse than what he felt right now.
“What will you do?” Jade whispers.
Ten sighs, his eyes narrowing. He knew better than to lash out like some sort of maniac. So he decided to stay cool and calm, he was notorious for that. No matter how difficult a situation be for him, he always remained calm. He was feared by all for this very reason, his silence and unreadable smile made him nothing short scary.
“It seems..Lucas and I will need to have a talk.”
He hands her the paper. “Put this back where you found it, then wait for me in the room at the end of the hall.”
Jade nods quickly and takes the paper from him before turning around.
“And Jade...I have no patience today, if you’re not naked and on your knees in five minutes..I will have no choice but to punish you..again.”
“I understand, your majesty.”
————
[JUNE 1896]
Ten gives your cheek a light kiss as he leaves your side.
“I’ll be gone for a few days, sweetheart, try not to miss me too much.”
“You’re always gone, Ten. I stopped missing you a long time ago. Now, I’m just used to it.”
“Ahhh, darling, don’t be so harsh. You know how it is for the King.” Ten straightens his arms out as his servant cleans his uniform of lint.
“I have to be here, I have to be there..the kingdom needs me.”
“And what about me? I’m carrying your baby, some care would be nice, what if I need you?” You were irritated at Ten today and couldn’t control your emotions as the contractions kept you up all night.
“My baby?” Ten quickly caught himself. “Don’t you mean our baby?”
You roll your eyes and lay back down in the bed as Ten smirks.
“I’ll have Seulgi bring you some tea for the pain.” He says as he exits the bedroom.
————
[JULY 1896]
“You have another letter, your majesty.”
You quickly take the letter from Seulgi and wave her off. “Thank you, you are dismissed.”
It was the first letter that you received from him in about two weeks, so you were more than excited to read it.
Dear y/n,
I apologize for taking so long to follow up with you. I have successfully escaped the Park Estate. Do not be worried, my love, for I only ran away to get settled before the baby arrives. I have taken several trains to get to where I am right now. It is beautiful, perfect even. I cannot think of a more suiting place for our family to thrive. I look forward to taking you here and being with you all the time. I am far enough so that no one will recognize me. Please promise me one thing, if Princess Rosé sends for me, do not tell her or anyone else in the kingdom where I am or about the letters that I send you. You are the only one that knows of my location. My mother and brother do not know and likely will not be asked for me, but when you get here safely, I will, of course, inform them as well. I am beaming with excitement. I cannot wait to see you again.
Yours eternally,
Lucas
———————
[AUGUST 1896]
You’re resting in your chambers, a heat flash making you too dizzy to even comprehend what time it is. You wish you could see your mother and father, but Ten’s mother has kept them from entering the premises, claiming that they would only add stress for you.
Ten sent your parents away to a different district where they would be in charge of finances. You thought it was unnecessary for them to be hours away from you, but Ten deemed them the right and only fit for the job.
A servant enters the room and calls out to you.
“Your majesty..”
“Yes..” you say groggily, squinting as the sun flight hurts your eyes.
You rub your belly and wince. “What is it?”
“Princess Rosé has come to see you, she says it is urgent.” Seulgi states with a look of worry.
“Let her in, please.” you sit up straight, preparing yourself for what is about to ensue.
Rosé comes rushing into your room.
“Your majesty! I cannot find Lucas!”
You furrow your brows. “What?”
Rosé sobs. “No one has seen him in two months...I thought he was visiting another city, but it turns out he never showed up. Your majesty, what if something’s happened to him? I am so worried..I.”
“Shhh...please, sit on the bed. We will find him, I’m sure he’ll be back from whatever trip he has taken soon enough.”
It hurt you to lie to Rosé like this, but it’s what Lucas asked of you.
He made you promise not to tell anyone the truth.
“It’s just..he’s never done this before, he’s never left and not even written a letter to me..oh, your majesty, I miss him so much.” Rosé cries hard into her hands.
You lean forward and rub her back. “He’s okay, Rosé, perhaps he needed some time away.”
She looks up at you. “You’re right, I think I left him too often. What if he doubts my love for him? He’s been so sweet to me, what if I’ve broken his big heart?”
Your eyes tear up as you think of the man you and Rosé both knew. Lucas loved everyone so deeply, he was a tall glass of love ever flowing, brightening anything and anyone he came into contact with.
It was a pity that someone as nice as Rosé would have to be hurt by both your actions.
Ten struts into the room. “What’s the matter?”
“I can’t find Lucas, I think something has happened to him, it’s been two months!” Rosé cries harder.
“Oh no..oh dear.” Ten steps closer before locking eyes with you, as if to ask if you knew anything about Lucas’ whereabouts.
You shrug your shoulders and shake your head as you pat Rosé’s back.
“Lucas, my dear friend. I’m sure he is hiking somewhere, going on some grand adventure like usually does. But do not worry, I will send out any and all of my men in search of him. We will speak to the countrymen and ask if they’ve seen him so we can trace his steps. We will search far and wide, even outside of the kingdom, Rosé. We will find him.”
“Oh, your majesty, I am forever in your debt.” Rosé stands up and bows to Ten.
But Ten watches your eyes, anxious to see how you react to his words. You wipe your eye of a tear and mouth “thank you.”
—————
[SEPTEMBER 1896]
“Doctor Qian...I might just rip this baby out myself..he dances like his father, and my belly is blessed to be the dance floor.” You wince as another contraction sets in.
The doctor lifts the stethoscope and his head from your stomach.
“Well, your majesty, I’m afraid you don’t have just one dancer in there.”
Your eyes grow large.“W-what?”
“There are, in fact, two heartbeats coming from your belly.”
“Doctor..what are you saying?”
“It looks like you’re in a considerable amount of pain because you’re pregnant with twins.”
He gives you a big smile.
You gasp. “Oh..my God.”
Ten walks into the room, fixing his pants as he steps in.
You scan him up and down while he smooths his hair back and breathes heavily.
He never made it to your appointments on time..even if he was already in the very castle that they occurred in.
“I’m sorry I’m late, any news doctor?” He says as he walks to your side of the bed.
“Yes, I was just informing your wife of her pregnancy with twins, your majesty.”
“Twins?!” Ten gasps, he immediately smiles from ear to ear, new found hope flooding his head. Could you possibly be pregnant with his child also?
“Yes, that is why she is in so much pain.”
“Sweetheart, that’s amazing.” Ten bends down to give you a kiss, but you turn your head.
“Doctor, when is the delivery date?”
Ten’s smile falls and he stands ups straight before rolling his shoulders.
“Late October or Early November, your highness.” The doctor snaps his briefcase shut, turning to bid you and Ten a farewell.
When the room is empty, you turn to Ten.
“Where were you, Ten?”
“Doesn’t matter, darling. I’m here now.” Ten shimmies off his jacket and sits on the edge of the bed.
“It does matter, because while the doctor is informing me of my health and the health of our CHILD, you’re off doing God knows what!”
You grip the sheets to hold in your anger.
“I can smell that bitch on you!” Your voice raises.
Ten moved over to you quickly, grabbing you by the throat and squeezing it slightly. His eyes full of pure anger.
“You’ve got some nerve, woman! I’ve given you everything you ask for, yet you lay here on the most expensive bed in this continent and all I hear from you are complaints! Be grateful for once and I may just want to spend time with you!”
He releases his grip and stands up before smoothing his pants.
You stare at him in shock. You contemplate tearing him apart with words, but you calm yourself. You needed to rest and keep your heartbeat stable to ensure the safe delivery of your babies, the ones you would soon raise with Lucas.
Ten walks to the door.
“You should rest and make sure my children are healthy..”
He looks at you over his shoulder. “Because if they aren’t...I’ll have your head put on a stake.”
—
Later that week, you receive another letter from Lucas. He tells you once again that he is safe and doing well, and is longing to see you.
You reply with a letter.
My dearest Lucas,
The doctor has informed me that I am pregnant with twins! Oh, how excited I am for you to meet them. They will have your laugh, your smile, your warmth. I love you, I wish you were here to take care of me. Ten has been absent on most days, leaving me to endure this pregnancy alone, even on the most painful nights. I know that if you were here, you’d be beside me through it all. Nonetheless, I pray that you are prepared for the twins. I will do my best to ensure their safe arrival. I look forward to reuniting with you soon and running away from this dreadful place, you will relieve me of my ties to this insane man and bring me to a paradise filled with true unconditional love, and we will live happily forever. My love, I need you..more than ever. Please be safe.
Yours Truly,
Y/n
After sending your letter off to a post office Lucas had given you the address of in another letter, you decide to walk about the castle for a while. The doctor advised you to take walks every now and then, but to not pressure yourself.
You head to the planetarium that Ten had built in just for you about a year ago. Back when Ten was caring and genuinely sweet, he did things for you just to see you smile. He knew you loved to look into the sky when you rested under the cherry blossom tree together, so he’d decided to get you a room where you could gaze together and hold hands just like you did in the old days.
You sit there and gaze at the stars, silently praying for a safe delivery that both you and your children would survive.
When you’ve spent an hour or so in the room, you finally get up and walk back to your room. You stop just after you pass by one of the rooms in the hallway. A loud groan escapes the door.
You lean in close and hear the whimpers of a woman as well. Your brows furrow. Surely, your servants wouldn’t be fooling around in your house.
You slowly turn the handle of the door and peak into the room.
Your heart drops at the sight and sound.
Ten makes love to Jade on the bed, thrusting his dick into her as her head falls over the edge of the bed and her legs spread further
apart. He sucks her neck and moans while a male servant enters him from behind, holding him by the waist as he pushes deep into your husband’s ass.
The man doesn’t see you as he throws his head back and looks to be on the brink of his climax.
A hand flies over your mouth, falling open.
You don’t make a sound, but Ten feels a gust of wind when the door opens up a little more.
He looks up at you, locking his dark, lustful eyes with your teary ones as you stand there in shock. Their bodies are naked, sweaty. Their moans and groans flood your ears.
But unlike the first time you caught him, he doesn’t stop. He pushes into her harder, still keeping eye contact with you.
He grabs her neck and begins to choke her, however, you just can’t seem to stop watching it all happen.
Her face begins to turn red, her eyes fly open and when she gets the upside down image of you in the doorway, she only chuckles.
Her voice gets louder as she cums.
“Oh! Oh, yes! Your majesty! Yes!” Her body shaking on the bed. Ten cums soon after, choking her harder as he watches you and grunts. The man behind him slams into Ten one more time before releasing into him and gripping onto his waist with his fingernails.
The audacity of them all. You clenched your fists, then slammed the door shut.
You wiped your tears with one hand and held your belly with the other. You tried not to cry too hard, for you didn’t want to stress yourself out, but Ten really ruined you. He didn’t care for you or love you, he only lusted after you. He only wanted to possess you.
That night, you kept yourself from crying by re-reading Lucas’ letters and dreaming of your wonderful life with him.
Ten had the nerve to bring breakfast to you the next morning.
You took the tray and threw it on the ground.
“Do you really think I’d eat something from you? You’re a revolting liar!”
“Oh? Revolting? Nice. Haven’t heard that one from you yet.” Ten sits on the edge of the bed.
“Yeah..well you really brought out my creativity after what you did yesterday.”
“What’s wrong? Are you jealous? You looked like you liked it..did it remind you of the first night?”
Ten taps the blanket with his fingers, slowly pushing them into the apex of your legs. “the night when Lucas and I played with your body? Ah, yes, we took turns entering and filling it up with our seed? It’s a shame he’s not here for us to do it again..”
His voice is laced with lust as he gazes at your swollen breasts.
“Don’t TOUCH me!” You move your leg and brush him off.
“So what? You’ll never let me touch you again? You’re my wife, darling..I have to touch you..kiss you..fuck you.” Ten gives a sadistic smile that you wish you could erase from your memory forever.
“You will NEVER put your dick in me again.”
“Then what good are you as my queen? We have to create a family..even after this pregnancy, there should be more, no? That’s what the people want, my love.”
“And if I leave you?” You say through gritted teeth.
Ten chuckles loudly. “Leave me? The king? I guess our children will be motherless, how sad. ‘Til death do us part,’ sweetheart, did you forget?”
“Why do you keep me around? You have people that give you what you need, because clearly, I am not enough..why do you hurt me?” Tears start to fill your eyes, making his apparition blurry.
“They’ll never be you..I love you..I need you, you’re mine and I’ll die before I let you go.” Ten runs his finger down your neck as he whispers.
“It feels amazing..having you here..to myself.”
“You’re pretty when you cry.” He wipes a tear.
“I hate you, Ten.”
Ten takes your hand and kisses it, laying it on the side of his face as he pouts.
“I love you too, sweetheart.”
————
[NOVEMBER 1896]
You hold Ten’s hand tightly, letting out another blood-curdling scream. Your hips feel like they will shatter at any moment as you deliver your children.
But after several hours of grueling contractions and labor, you deliver two beautiful girls. Ten let you choose the names so you chose Yīngtáo for Cherry and Kāihuā for Blossom as Lucas had suggested in a letter to you once.
Ten rocks one twin in his arms as he tears up. You rock the other in your arms and smile at her.
“Oh, y/n..they’re beautiful.” Ten sobs.
You smile. “I know..”
Your nurses take the babies away and into their care room, where they are bathed and fed. The doctor also checks their vitals to ensure that they are healthy.
It’s just you and Ten in the room after it’s been cleaned up.
Ten lays down beside you, pulling you into his arms. You’re too tired to push yourself away from him, so you welcome his embrace by relaxing your body.
Your head rests on his chest, rising up and down slowly and steadily.
“You did well, my love.” Ten says softly.
“Yeah..I guess I did, even after all the shit you put me through.”
Ten chuckles lightly then sighs. “That night of the Chinese festival..it was so long ago..and look at what has happened. We have been blessed with not one, but two healthy babies. How can we tell which is which?”
“Well, I’m sure it will be easier to differentiate between the two as they get older..”
“No, my love. How can we tell which child is mine..and which child is his?” Ten says slowly.
Your eyes open as you sit up straight and look at Ten.
“His? What are you talking about?”
Ten runs his fingers down your back and the look on his face makes your skin crawl, his eyes low as he daunts a proud smirk.
“I know about everything, my love. I know what you did last summer. I know that you had sex with Lucas several times...even on that same night that I lost you.”
Your mouth falls open, but Ten doesn’t give you a chance to speak, his hand still running up and down your back.
“And..I want you to know...I forgive you...whether or not they’re mine..I forgive you.” He kisses your cheek.
“I will raise them as my own, for you have just made me the happiest man on Earth.” He whispers into your ear.
“Ten..” your eyes still wide after the shock. Ten knew that you and Lucas were engaging in and affair, and he didn’t tell you until now. How was it that he was so calm? Why did he keep you alive after learning of your whereabouts that night?
“Everything is all right now. I love you, my darling. I love our children.” Ten nuzzles himself onto your neck and pulls you closer to him as he drifts off into sleep quietly.
Your eyes fill with tears, but you quickly wipe them away and remind yourself of the last letter Lucas sent you.
He said to meet him at the cherry tree next week at a specific time. That is when he will come to your rescue and take you and your kids away. You smile and close your eyes, dreaming once again of your love.
————
[One Week Later]
It is after midnight when you creep out of your chambers. Ten had once again disappeared but you didn’t care where he was. In fact, you are beyond thankful for his neglect tonight of all nights. This evening you and your babies would run away with Lucas.
The palace was basically dead. The servants were working downstairs on the first floor. Normally, you and Ten had the top floor to yourselves for the evening. If you ever needed to call for a servant, there was a bell that could be rung that could be heard across the residence.
It was the last thing you needed. You didn’t pack much into your small bag. You removed your sleepwear and put on a pair of pants and a loose-fitting shirt. You put a cloak over yourself and bundled your sleeping girls up in your arms. You prayed they stayed peacefully asleep. You ran away quickly, knowing it would be stupid to leave Ten a letter.
You run towards a servant’s exit to the gardens that were right outside of your bedroom. You knew that no one would cross paths with you up until this point. You let out a sigh of relief and looked down at the babies. They still slept peacefully. You smile down at them and exit through the gardens.
You enter past the schoolyard you once frequented, amazed and saddened at the sour turn your friendship with Ten and Lucas had taken. You spot the cherry blossom tree in the distance and see a man leaning against the back of it, a baby stroller right beside him. Lucas was already waiting for you and your heart swelled with happiness.
You say, “Lucas…”
As you get closer and closer, Lucas slowly turns over and you see…
Wait.
“Darling,” Ten starts with a wide smile on his face, “Fancy seeing you here of all places in the middle of the night. Quite careless of you to expose the girls to the elements so soon.”
You back away. What is he doing here? How did he know you were-
Ten clicks his tongue. “Were you expecting someone else?”
You are stunned to silence. You couldn’t think straight. Where was Lucas, you thought. Perhaps he was late. What if he was still on his way to the rendezvous point? And now that Ten was here, you wouldn’t be able to get away with Lucas. You hope Lucas is stealthy and he avoids detection. You could arrange another meeting time. Find another way to escape.
You try to make up an excuse. “I-”
Ten raises his arms. “Your arms must ache from carrying both of the girls. Allow me,” he says as he takes Yīngtáo.
He cradles her and continues, “What brings you here, y/n? You have one chance to answer honestly.”
His nurturing smile at his daughter fades as he looks at you. “Don’t test me.”
You sigh as you cradle Kāihuā. “I’m leaving, Ten.”
Ten laughs. “You are? Are you walking on foot with my daughters to the next town?”
You sigh. “Enough, Ten. I’m leaving. With Lucas. You have kept him and I apart for too long. This,” you say, “Is not a true marriage. If you loved me at all, you would let me go.”
He caresses your cheek. As quickly as you flinch, he removes his hand from you. “Oh, sweet, foolish y/n. How do you explain my presence in the cherry blossom tree? Exactly at midnight.”
“You must’ve followed me…” You start.
He smiles. “‘You will relieve me of my ties to this insane man and bring me to a paradise filled with true unconditional love, and we will live happily forever’.”
Your heart sinks as he reads the words you wrote to Lucas. Ten found one of your letters. Did that mean he got it before Lucas could receive it? But how, you wonder.
He pouts. “Insane? Me? Is that how you really think of me?”
You are tempted to snap at him but don’t want to alarm your babies. You take a deep breath and reply, “What would you call an unfaithful spouse who won’t let you go?”
He laughs. “You’re one to talk about infidelity.” He then coos as he looks at your daughter, “You are just as flawed as I am. That is why we are a perfect match, y/n.”
You scoff. “We are not meant to be, Ten. I’m leaving with Lucas. No matter what you say. Have us banished from the kingdom. Tell everyone you banished me. I’m sure your mother will be thrilled.”
Ten shakes his head. “Oh, no, no. That just won’t do. Where will you go?” He fakes concern in his voice.
“You don’t have to worry about that,” you say.
Ten continues to mock. “Well, it will be hard for you to go alone. Especially since Lucas won’t be joining you.”
Your stomach churns. “What are you talking about?”
He beams. “He will remain in the kingdom. In the most permanent sense, sweetheart.”
You frown in confusion and fear. “Ten, what-”
He continues, reveling in what he will share with you.
He recites, “‘Once the delivery is successful, I will pick you up and we will run away from this place together, raising our child in the sunniest place for the rest of our lives. We will finally be together, my love’.”
Ten also got a hold of Lucas’ letters to you. How long had he kept this hidden, you wondered. And your eyes widened at another realization.
Ten says, “Ah, y/n...y/n...You underestimate me. I must admit that hurts me deeply. Did you really think this charade would go unpunished?”
“Ten…What did you do?” You ask shakily.
————
[Flashback - JUNE 1896]
Lucas brushes Hazel’s mane at the Park Estate’s stables.
“Your Highness,” one of the servants calls to him.
He looks up at the servant and freezes up at the sight of Ten beside him.
“His Royal Majesty Ten Lee seeks an audience with Your Highness,” the servant says.
Lucas nods stiffly. “Thank you. You are dismissed.”
The servant departs and Ten stands there, an unreadable smile on his face.
“It’s been a long time...brother,” Ten begins.
Lucas steps away from Hazel and approaches his half-brother. “Your Majesty, to what do I owe the pleasure?”
Ten replies, “I’ve missed our friendship.”
Lucas scoffs. “Have you now?”
Ten shakes his head. “Remember that I am your king, brother. I won’t tolerate you speaking down to me.” He nods his head over to his team of guards, which included the ever-hostile Hendery. Hendery flashes a condescending smile at Lucas.
Lucas was still nursing the cut under his chin that Hendery gave him from the first time he visited. Lucas chose not to mention anything to arouse suspicion from the Parks. When they inquired, he said that it was from a sparring incident and they all left it at that.
Ten continues, “Let’s go hunting.”
Lucas begrudgingly accepts and joins Ten and his men to go hunting in the nearby forest that Lucas was most familiar with. The two brothers take their bows and arrows to hunt for deer. It is a tense and quiet walk.
When they finally see targets, Lucas eases up and is thankful for the distraction.
Ten shoots at a deer in the distance but misses. The deer scurries off. He hisses.
Lucas can’t help a chuckle. Hunting was never Ten’s strong suit.
Ten turns to Lucas. “Something funny, Lucas?”
Lucas shakes his head, smiling. “You’re still terrible with a bow and arrow.”
Ten recalls the times he and Lucas went hunting when they were kids. He laughs. “I’m afraid so.”
Lucas had his reservations about Ten. He resented him for marrying you, cheating on you, neglecting you during your time of need, and keeping you away from him. But deep down, he still had affection for his best friend. That connection didn’t just go away, especially since they were actually bonded by blood. And part of him ached for Ten because soon, you and Lucas would leave and never see him again, your friendship permanently severed.
Lucas does his best to put on a good face. He and Ten regale about their adolescence and their shenanigans in the palace. Ten asks about Rosé and his time in the Park Estate. Lucas asks about the kingdom and how his reign is progressing. He even politely asks about you, acting like you two hadn’t spoken to each other since the festival. Ten replies that you are well and are expecting to deliver the baby sometime in October or November. Lucas pretends to not know this information.
“Congratulations, Your Majesty. A royal heir,” Lucas starts as he aims his arrow in search of a target.
Ten only watches Lucas now. “Indeed, y/n has made me the happiest man. The baby is just the beginning for us, Lucas.”
Lucas evens out his expression so Ten doesn’t catch onto his irritation. However, Ten knew what he was doing.
Ten continues as he readies his bow and arrow. “I think I’ve found my first kill for the day, brother...” He turns to Lucas, whose back is to him. Ten positions his arrow against the bow.
“Oh?” Lucas asks, oblivious, focused on finding deer.
“Take a look,” Ten says quietly. He closes one eye shut and focuses his aim.
As Lucas turns to face Ten, Ten releases the arrow, striking Lucas.
Very near to the heart, as Ten anticipated.
Lucas groans as he falls down to his knees. “What have you done?!” He quickly falls on his knees, blood seeping out of his wound. Lucas loses even more energy and falls to the ground, face first.
Ten walks over to Lucas. Lucas slowly crawls away, attempting to evade his hunter. “You know, I had my doubts about today. Coming to see you, inviting you to the forest, and making you the prize of this hunt...But I can’t take any chances, Lucas. y/n belongs to me. It’s time for you to know that. Soon, she will see it, too.”
Lucas gasps heavily, “Help...me…”
Ten laughs. “Do you think anyone here is on your side, bastard?”
Lucas feels faint. He is about to lose consciousness, knowing that he is very near to his end. He was torn between wishing to be saved and ending his suffering. But through all of this, he could only think of you and his child. Tears fell from his eyes. He had to fight until the end. He continues to crawl but he is fading with each passing moment.
Ten barks, “Hendery, Doyoung, pick him up.”
Ten’s guards appear. Lucas can only see their shoes. Hendery and Doyoung pick Lucas up off of the ground. Hendery quickly pushes Lucas against the nearest tree. Lucas loses his breath at the harsh contact.
Hendery quickly pulls the arrow out of his chest and Lucas yells in agony. Hendery can’t help himself, pulling out a dagger and stabbing Lucas right in the heart, turning the dagger slowly and torturously.
Ten shakes his head. “You were supposed to wait for my order, Hendery.”
Hendery pulled his dagger out of Lucas’s bloody chest. He lets go of Lucas’s body. It falls to the ground like a chopped down tree, heavy but lifeless.
Hendery backs away and bows to Ten. “My apologies, Your Majesty.”
Ten nods. “Doyoung, prepare the crate. We’re going home, gentlemen.”
————
[Present - November 1896]
The twins slept in the carriage now.
“What did you do to him?” You whisper loudly, hot tears streaming down your face. You knew it in your gut that Ten got to Lucas.
“What had to be done, dearest,” Ten says.
“Where is he?” You ask, dreading his answer.
“Right underneath us,” Ten says as he looks down at the grass.
You slowly process his words. You look down to the ground and realize Lucas was buried right underneath the tree that started it all.
You stumble and fall to the ground. “No…”
Ten continues, “Lucas is dead, y/n.”
You shake your head. “Ten, you wouldn’t…”
He responds, “You were straying. I had to intervene.”
You refuse to listen. “You...are many things. You are not a killer.”
He finishes, “I would do anything for you, y/n.”
Images and memories of your true love flash into your mind. Lucas’s welcoming smile when he meets you the first time. The horseback riding. The first time you made love before Ten entered the room at the party. The days in Wanderlust. Your last night together at the festival. You sob, trying to control your volume. “No, no, no. Please, God, no...Ten, what-”
“I did it for us, angel,” Ten says as he bends down and raises your chin to look at him, adoring your gorgeous face as you weep.
You pull away. “You killed him...Ten, that’s an act of treason. You can’t get away with this.”
“I can. And I will, y/n.” He gets you up off of the ground. “Come along now. The girls will soon need to get fed again.”
You pull yourself away from Ten. “Don’t touch me. I will never let you touch me again.”
Ten laughs. “You would be smart to obey me, y/n. Or I will take the twins away from you.”
Tears staining your face, you grasp the stroller handle and your knuckles turn white. You want to lunge for your monstrous husband but know that regardless of your status as queen, Ten always had the last word. You knew he could take the girls away from you. He was as good (well as evil) as his word.
Ten leads you back to the palace. He offers to handle the stroller but you refuse to let go of your babies. They were your reason to continue living this never ending nightmare. It was up to you that they didn’t grow up to be like their “father”.
————
[DECEMBER 1896]
You silently mourn the death of Lucas, cursing at the heavens for taking away the most heavenly creature from you. The Park Estate and the Kingdom of Hearts have continued their search parties across the continent for Lucas. Ten, unironically, was at the forefront. He made sure they looked everywhere. The last place they would look was where Lucas’s remains laid: the cherry blossom tree.
The search teams were losing hope and Princess Rosé was inconsolable. Your heart ached for her as you knew the truth. So you did what you could and listened to her when she came to visit. You could not leave the palace under your concerned husband’s orders. You theorized that the pressure of becoming king overwhelmed him and he ran. That at the very least he was safe and starting a new life. You and Rosé knew that was a load of bullshit. Lucas would have at least sent a letter, apologizing. That was the kind of person he was.
You continue to nurse the babies. You channel all of your energy in taking care of them, checking in with Doctor Kun daily. You drink the best herbal teas. Your diet is consistent. You couldn’t starve yourself. Even if every bite of food was no longer savory, you continued to eat. You had to sustain yourself for the sake of your children. Ten is thrilled that you have invested all of your time as a mother, as you should’ve from the start.
If you allowed yourself to think about anything besides the well-being of your children, you knew your mind would wander to a dark place.
You are reading a book on motherhood in the library one day while the babies are napping. Seulgi comes to you.
“Your Majesty, a letter has arrived for you,” she says.
You shoot Seulgi a look as you take the letter. “Did His Majesty get a hand on this?”
Seulgi’s eyes widened at your hostility. “Your Majesty…”
You sigh. “I trusted in you, Seulgi...Ten got his hand on my personal letters. And I know he got to you.”
Seulgi panics. “I am so sorry, Your Majesty. I wanted to protect you but the king threatened the safety of my family.” Tears well up in her eyes. “If it were up to me, I would be fiercely loyal to you. Only you. But as long as the king reigns, I have no choice.”
You get up from your chair and put your hands on Seulgi’s forearms. “I know.”
Seulgi hiccups. “Your Majesty?”
You say, “I understand. You don’t have to worry. I know that you are a good person. You have always stood by me. You’ve taken a beating for me, for heaven’s sake. I still carry that with me to this day.”
Seulgi shakes her head. “I would do it again, Your Majesty. You have always been kind to me.” She had worked in the palace for over ten years, ever since she was a little girl. “Without you, the palace would be hell.”
You smile at Seulgi, “I appreciate that. And there’s no need to worry. The personal letters have ceased so if His Majesty inquires about the letters, you can hand them over…” You have given up on keeping secrets from Ten. He was right. You truly underestimated how vile he was.
Seulgi shakes her head. “His Majesty has not seen this letter, Your Majesty...And it’s better that he does not.” She bows.
You realize what she says and quickly dismiss her. You open the letter.
Dear y/n,
I am so sorry to write to you as you are still nursing your children. I congratulate you and your husband for the safe delivery of your daughters. I implore you: if you know anything that the palace has not admitted to the public about Prince Lucas’ whereabouts, please tell me. I fear that something terrible has happened. He wouldn’t have run away. He was committed to staying with the princess. He wouldn’t have disappeared without sending us a letter after the fact at the very least. I await your response.
Many blessings,
Kahei
Lucas’ mother and the rest of his family were also kept in the dark. Ten forbade you from reaching out to them again. It was a part of his threat to take the girls away from you. And even if you dared send them a letter, you feared for their safety and yours. You wondered just how long Ten would keep the charade up. He could easily have Lucas’s remains moved and found anywhere he commanded. Why keep everyone in the dark about his status? He was a sick man.
You complied with Ten’s orders but refused to lie in bed with him. You were thankful that the twins needed to be fed every few hours throughout the night, as well. Ten was displeased but he couldn’t deny you from protecting his daughters. For they were his daughters. Soon, they would be weaned and you two could get back on track, he thought. You needed time to forget Lucas and you would, he firmly believed.
Ten continued his affairs throughout the palace. It was a game to him: a game of where can I sleep with the help without my wife knowing. But he got sloppy sometimes as his lust overtook him more times than he could count. You caught him several times without detection and simply resumed your day. Ten fucked Miss Oral in the kitchen at 4 AM? Okay. Ten had an orgy with nine other servants in the garden? Ambitious. Ten kept that little tart Jade on after so many months? You were disappointed but not shocked.
It infuriated you but it wasn’t like you didn’t know the truth.
And then, the next blow was delivered.
————
[2 Weeks Later]
You finish eating dinner alone in your chambers. The twins are being bathed by the servants. Ten is away on another useless search party. It was like a pageant for him. The public would say, “The honorable king is unrelenting when it comes to searching for his lost childhood friend.” A touching story. You resisted the urge to punch a wall.
Seulgi hands you another letter. She bows and quickly leaves you to read in private.
My dear daughter,
I pray this letter finds you well. I don’t know if you have been receiving my letters as you have not responded. In case they have disappeared due to the distance, I should tell you that His Majesty has transferred us to the Western continent and we only just caught wind of your delivery. How we wish to meet our grandchildren. How your father wished it more than anything. y/n, I am so sorry to say this but your father has passed from tuberculosis. I miss him so much and I wish more than anything for us to be together to mourn him. We have buried him the day I write this to you. Please, if you receive this letter, send for me. Or come to me, if you can. I miss you and love you, always. Many blessings to you and my beautiful granddaughters.
Love,
Your Mother
You fall down to the floor and wail. Seulgi and Irene quickly run into the room, having been nearby cleaning the other rooms.
“Your Majesty, what’s wrong?” Irene asks.
Seulgi rubs your back. “Your Majesty…”
“My f-father,” you say between sobs, “H-he’s gone.” You shake yourself off of the two women. You shake your head as you look down at the two women.. “Did you two know?!”
Irene shakes her head. And so does Seulgi.
“Seulgi...Did. You. Know?!” You demanded as you took the glass pitcher of water and threw it to the ground, the glass shattering all over the marble floor. You stand there, barefoot.
“Your Majesty, don’t walk over the-” Irene starts.
You don’t care. Nothing could hurt as much as the pain you feel inside. Not only did you lose the love of your life. Your freedom. Your happiness. You lost one of the only people in your corner who had been stripped from you because of the king and that crone’s orders. You walk over the glass, the shards piercing your feet.
Seulgi runs over to you. “Your Majesty, stop. Irene, get the first aid kit immediately!”
Irene runs off to get the kit. Seulgi tries to put her arms around you.
You shrug her off and say quietly, “My father was dying and you mean to tell me no one knew?”
Seulgi shakes her head. “King Ten was always there when I collected your mail and I could never deliver their letters to you. That is the truth. Please, Your Majesty, you have to believe me.” She cries again. “If I had known...I would’ve told you. I-”
“Of course,” you stop her, “Of course, my beloved husband knew. That witch of a mother of his also knew...Those two will really stop at nothing to strip every person I love away from me.”
More servants rushed to your chambers.
You yell. “Leave! Get out! Run along and tell the king his queen is acting up if you haven’t already. In fact, I demand his presence. So go get him up from whatever bed he lies in and yank his dick off of whatever pussy it resides in.”
A couple of servants run to get the king, astonished at your behavior.
Seulgi and Irene quickly disinfect and bandage your feet. “We will call Doctor Kun to tend to your wounds this evening,” Irene says.
Ten returns, his hair disheveled and bites apparent on his neck.
You look up at your husband, who stands at the door in shock at the sight of you.
“Husband! How nice to see you!” You said as you laid your bloody feet up on the bed.
Ten only looks at you in dismay. “What happened to your feet? Who is responsible for this? I will have them-”
“Oh, shut up,” you start, “I did it.”
Ten looks at you in shock. Your eyes looked so lifeless, so defeated. He almost didn’t recognize you. “Why?” He asks, pathetically.
You show him the letter. “I got this letter before anyone else could get to it. I wanted to see how my parents were doing. Since you and your mother have moved them away from me, I figured it was about time I got an update, no?”
Ten sees the letter in your hand and turns to Seulgi.
“Do not take this out on any of our servants. This is between you and me. Now, I’ve received news of my father’s passing. That’s interesting...Do you know why? Probably because I never got news of his sickness, much less that you transferred them to the fucking western continent.”
Ten pushes past the servants and his shoes crush the broken glass into tinier pieces. “y/n, I was going to tell you but I wanted to ensure your safe delivery first and-”
You raise your hand. “You took them away from me. My parents. And now my father’s dead. You just couldn’t be the only one fatherless, could you?!”
“y/n, I will not allow you to-”
You cut him off. “I’ve had enough of your games, husband. I have been so damn complacent. Meanwhile, you’ve probably fucked every maid in this room…”
The female servants, apart from Irene and Seulgi, couldn’t meet your eye, confirming your thoughts.
“Am I a joke to all of you?” You ask everyone in the room. “If it weren’t for me, you would all be rotting in the dungeon because of His Majesty’s intolerance for ONE miniscule mistake.” You grab the glass of water on your nightstand and break it. You hold one sharp piece of glass.
Ten tries to calm you down. “y/n, I-”
You hold the piece of glass in your hand, quivering. “You will send for my mother and for my father’s casket. We will give them a proper burial in the kingdom. It is the least you can do, Your Majesty.”
Ten relents, fearing you for the first time. You simply needed time to digest the news and he would give it to you. He would abide by your wishes and bring your family back to the kingdom.
————
[JANUARY 1897]
Ten gave you the distance you needed. You didn’t give a damn where he was so long as he left you alone. Your mother arrived, along with your father’s casket. Your father was given a proper royal burial. Your friends of the family attended. Ten stood beside you and your mother. The crocodile tears were provided by Ten’s mother.
You were able to see your mother more as she moved back into your childhood home. She helped you take care of the twins.
The time apart from Ten gave you more time to think.
Perhaps you weren’t as trapped as you thought.
Your animosity faded for you still had appearances to maintain. Ten believed you to forgive him for his indiscretion with your father. Like there was nothing else to be forgiven.
Ten continues lazing around with the servants but his favored servant remains to be Jade. Jade slowly gets it into her head that she can one day get rid of you and take your place. Ten never planned for that. You were number one in his heart.
Ten and Jade lie together in a bedroom in the first floor west wing of the palace.
“I love you, Your Majesty,” Jade whispers into his ear as she snuggles herself closer to him.
Ten only grunts, imagining you to say those words again. How he longed to hear your words of affection directed towards him again.
Suddenly, his heart and abdomen grow bigger. “J-Jade, I...I feel ill. Hand me a glass of water,” he starts.
Jade gives him a glass of water and he downs it. The pain he feels only worsens. It felt like he was being eaten from the inside out. All over his body. He starts roaming his hands all over his naked body, trying to feel for what is gnawing at him.
“Ahhh,” Ten yells out in pain. “Jade, there is something wrong with me.”
“Your Majesty!” Jade yells as she gets out of bed. “I will call the doctor.”
Jade runs out the door. Ten lies in bed, his body burning from the gnawing sensation he feels inside. What was wrong with him, he thought. An hour or so passes and Jade still has not returned.
“Jade!” Ten calls out. “Anyone!” His voice has fallen weak. He cannot move because the pain is too agonizing.
The door opens and you enter. “Why, hello Ten.”
You look absolutely radiant. Better than you have looked in months. You are beaming with a joy he had never seen you have. You wore a green ball gown, like you were ready to tend to visiting royals. You hadn’t dressed up this nicely since you conceived the twins.
“I ran into that little tramp of yours and she told me you were ill so I thought I would come tend to my poor, poor husband…” You coo, mimicking the way he patronized you for so long.
“Darling! Please help me, I am in pain. Get the doctor,” he grunts out word for word.
You sigh. “Now why would I do that?”
He looks at you with wide eyes. “Wh-”
You sit on the bed beside him, increasing his discomfort at the sudden movement of the bed. “Now if only Jade was around...She would’ve called the doctor for you. She would do nothing short of murder for you if you wished it. But...Jade is indisposed. In the most permanent sense, sweetheart.”
“y/n-” Ten starts.
“You two enjoyed rolling around in the hay so much...So I thought it fitting that she’d die the way she would enjoy most.”
Ten looks up at you in horror as you ruffle his hair.
You finish, “Consumed by the earth itself.”
Ten cries out. “y/n, help...me...Please…”
You quickly get off of the bed. “It hurts a lot, doesn’t it?” You ask.
Ten is furious but his pain overpowers any emotion. He only cries. He doesn’t have the words.
“Are you familiar with the Gu poison?” You ask, softly.
Ten’s eyes widen at the word “poison”.
You continue. “It is incredible how it’s created. You see, venomous snakes, scorpions, and centipedes are collected into a jar. They have to fight each other for survival and ultimately devour each other. The last creature standing holds a concentrated toxin. The toxin has no taste so someone can easily slip it into your supper and you would never know it was laced with poison. It takes up to ten days for it to act. And look now, on our dear old friend Lucas’ birthday, the poison has taken effect. It was meant to be this day.”
“You bitch-” Ten spurts out.
You check your nails and shut the curtains. “Do you really want our last moments together to be so full of hatred?”
You tie one of his silk ties around his mouth. He thrashes about but you overpower him. You take the other silk ties and tie them around his arms.
“You must want to know what it feels like to be tied up, don’t you? You certainly loved doing it to me,” you continue.
Ten continues to writhe in pain. He feels himself slowly fading. It was torture. He would much rather get stabbed in the heart. Any death must have been better than this feeling: he felt like he was being eaten alive. Tiny little creatures were gnawing at him from the inside. He wanted to rip his flesh open and take the critters out.
You sigh. “My father’s death was the final straw, Ten. I wanted to kill you the moment you told me Lucas was six feet under the cherry blossom tree but you had me under your thumb. I’m not going to take it anymore, dearest.”
Ten cries. “y/n, please...I will do anything...Please save me…”
You say, “You promised a lot of things to me. But you failed me. Time and time again. Fucking anything that moved. And I can’t take this anymore. I was ready to leave. You could have let me go and still laid with any woman you wanted. But no...You wanted to possess me...like some doll. And you killed Lucas, the true love of my life. You and your mother have pulled the strings of our lives for too long. This is the end.”
Ten manages to say, “y/n-“
“I have had it, Ten,” you say. “I know where the antidote is but I’m afraid it is impossible for me to get it now.”
Ten cries. “No…”
You sigh. “It’s buried with that harlot. Such a pity. She really left you in the lurch, didn’t she?”
That was how you planned to spin it. Jade, the jealous servant, who wanted to take your place, threw herself into a jealous rage and poisoned the king. You had her confession letter prepared very nicely. You wondered if you hired the same scribe who Ten hired to imitate Lucas’ handwriting. Either way, that scribe kept their mouth shut when they saw the fire in your eyes.
Ten cries loudly but his screams are muffled by the silk tie.
“Now, I would be with you during your final breaths but that wouldn’t look good for me, would it? You certainly wouldn’t want me to take the fall for a crime that the commendable Jade committed?”
Tears stream down your face now as you finally release your suppressed emotions. “You brought this on yourself, husband. All of this. You’ve brought me to this point with each betrayal. Now accept the consequences.” You walk out of the room, not a servant in sight.
Ten lies in bed and thrashes around, his eyes red and teary with angry veins as he screams loudly. Unfortunately, no one hears him because his rendezvous points with his multitude of lovers were always away from the majority of servants.
All he felt was agony. Surely, any death would’ve been better than this. His heartbeat dwindled and his last thought before he succumbed to his death was of you being taken by him the very first time at the graduation party.
————
[Three Days Later]
The Kingdom of Hearts was once again in mourning. The people mourn the death of King Ten. He was a strong presence, just like his father. The young King was destined to expand the kingdom and its wealth, but his life was cut short due to poisoning. Found by you, his dead body was found in the west wing, tied up. You found a letter from one of your servants, confessing to the crime. She was in love with His Majesty. She quickly disappeared with the night. Now, there was a bounty for her head and her family was under watch in case she returned or made contact with them.
His Royal Majesty is survived by you, his wife, the Queen, and your twin daughters, Princesses Yīngtáo and Kāihuā.
The funeral procession was beautiful. People from all over the continent gathered to pay their respects for the fallen king. Flowers from all over the continent were tossed over his casket. He was laid to rest in the Royal Cemetery beside his father.
Ten’s mother was inconsolable. She lost her husband and her son. You were also inconsolable. You wept and wept. Nothing was holding you back from mourning who you've lost.
You lost a lot in a matter of months. You lost Lucas. You lost your father. Hell, you lost Ten a long time ago. Nearly everything you once treasured vanished in the blink of an eye.
You could finally let it all out and it worked to your benefit. No one would dare suspect you of foul play. Not even former Queen Lee.
You had tea with her after the procession.
“y/n, you really loved my son,” she says between sniffles.
You sip your tea, feeling calmer now. It took her so long to realize that you weren’t the wretch she thought you to be. But maybe that was just her spiked tea speaking. She would probably return to hating you, tomorrow
Or would she?
You are the sole ruler of the kingdom now. Until you marry again. Then again, who said you had to marry again? There was no official law that mandated you to.
The queen was complacent now because you were in charge. It was in her best interest to be on your good graces.
But after years of enduring her insults and for her hand in omitting to tell you about your father's illness, you were afraid that that was no longer an option.
“Mother,” you begin, “You should know that the little slag Jade was not responsible for your son’s death.”
Ten’s mother nearly drops her cup of tea as she shakily puts it down.
She openly glares at you now. “What are you saying, y/n?”
“Do you really think Jade was smart enough to get the poison to put into Ten’s supper? There is only one thing she excelled at and it was fucking your son. He loved to fuck her like the little whore he was.”
The queen got up from the table and was about to grab you. “You take that back, you little wretch.”
You refused to cower away from this crone. Her baby boy was no longer there to shield her now. You had the power.
She is about to slap you but you grab her arm. She tries to wriggle out of your grasp.
“I poisoned your son, Mother. I exterminated that beast before he hurt me again. He fucked all of the servants behind my back. He killed Lucas. He lied about my father.”
“You’re the damned beast,” she says as she spits in your face. She bawls. “My baby...What have you done?!”
You don’t flinch. You take a napkin and wipe away the spit from your face. “It is not in your benefit to defy me, Mother…”
“Shut up, you insolent wench,” the Queen removes herself from your grasp and attempts to lunge for you. You trip her to the ground.
You continue, “I have to wonder...how much you knew…”
Ten’s mother opens her mouth and closes it immediately. It is all in her eyes.
“You hag,” you say, “I’ll take that as a confirmation of my suspicions.”
You place your foot over her back so she can’t get up. “Does the term Gu poison ring any bells?”
The queen’s eyes widen in shock as she looks up at you.
You add, “I believe you tried to poison Lucas’ mother that way once upon a time…”
“How did you know-“
“Surely, Ten brought you up to speed on my visits to Wanderlust. In fact, I’m sure you were the first person prepared to set the town ablaze so long as Kahei burned, didn’t you?”
“Don’t mention that whore’s name in my palace!” Ten’s mother pushed herself and yanked you by the leg so you stumble.
Seulgi runs in. “Your Majesty, are you alright?”
You regain your footing and you kick the woman’s legs away.
The former Queen barks at Seulgi. “You were outside this whole time, girl? The queen is at her wit’s end. Someone needs to detain her!”
Seulgi stands there, awaiting your orders.
Ten’s mom grabs Seulgi by the arm. “What are you doing, you worthless fool? This woman poisoned the king. She admitted it. Arrest her.”
Seulgi shakes herself off of her. “You must be hearing things, madam. It must be from your age.”
Ten’s mother was an irritable crone. One of her biggest triggers was any mention of her age.
“Girl,” Ten’s mom begins again about to yank Seulgi by the hair. She quickly backs up.
Seulgi speaks up, “I’ve served this household since I was thirteen years old. You have never called me by my name. You have beaten my mother more times than I count. You have paid my family insufficiently. Your abuse and condescension made you an unfitting Queen. Your son was the spitting image of you in terms of how he treated the staff. The minute news came of his passing, I breathed a sigh of relief. Because Queen y/n is now in charge. She cares about her people and her servants. Unlike. You.”
Ten’s mother yells, “Insolent vermin, you are!”
Seulgi bows. “I will be outside the door if you need anything, Your Majesty.” She leaves you with the Queen.
Ten’s mother grew more livid. “You have turned the help against me, have you not?”
You shrug. “A little kindness goes a long way, Mother. It’s unfortunate neither you or your son have possessed it.”
Ten’s mother is about to lunge at you again when she clams up and clutches her chest.
“y/n...my heart…” Ten’s mother falls over. You simply stand there.
After a few minutes, you tell Seulgi to alert the servants that the queen suddenly died of a heart attack. It was sudden and as you and Seulgi tried to get her up, it was too late.
————
[February 1897]
Ten and his parents were united in death. Now that they were out of the picture, it was time to announce the findings of Lucas’ remains. It just so happened that you found a letter in Ten’s study, confirming his instructions to bury Lucas under the cherry blossom tree.
It turned out the scribe you hired before had indeed worked with Ten. The scribe had also imitated Ten’s handwriting rather well.
Princess Rosé was beside you as the servants uncovered Lucas’ remains.
Lucas’ body was decomposed a long time ago. But specialists confirmed that his body was severed into many pieces, like he was a piece of meat.
You and Princess Rosé cried together. You felt some of your guilt leave your body. Now Rosé could move on, just as she rightfully deserved.
You two had dinner and then walked around the palace grounds together.
“I don’t know what I would’ve done without you, y/n,” she says as she sniffles.
You squeeze her hand as you walk together. “Thank you for everything, Rosé. You’ve been my rock throughout this whole process.”
It was true. Although you and Lucas had cheated, you never harbored any negative feelings toward Rosé. She didn’t know that you and Lucas were in love when he entered the arranged marriage with her. She was never malevolent. She trusted her husband and believed the best of him. She protected him at the festival when she knew he had run off God-knows-where. It was unfair to her.
You wished you could keep your distance from her because you didn’t want to keep living a lie with her.
“I know you and Lucas met the night of the festival, y/n…” She admits as you walk through the rose garden.
You stop in your tracks.
Rosé hasn’t let go of your hand, even after admitting this. “Originally, when he disappeared, I thought he’d run away to meet with you…”
You listen to her, afraid to say something that will anger her.
But Rosé, ethereal and gentle, looked at you, calm. There was sadness in her eyes. “I know he loved you.”
You cry, about to apologize like you wanted to for so long. “Rosé, I-“
She says solemnly, “I know…When I realized you never ran away to meet him, I realized that something was wrong. As much as you two hurt me, I...couldn’t stop loving Lucas. When we were together, he was so kind, y/n. He just pulls you in with those eyes and that smile. You know this more than anyone.”
You nod shyly. “I do.”
“I would’ve let you two run off. You would’ve had to evade my vengeful family for all of your days but at least, you would’ve been together.”
You weep, astonished at Rosé’s kindness. “You...I don’t deserve your kindness.”
She shakes her head. “You don’t. But you need it more than ever.”
You two hug and continue your walk. You make it to the weaponry room near the stables where you overhear some of the guards drinking.
“A toast to our fallen king,” a man begins.
“To our fallen king,” the other men continue.
“Now we are subject to the whims of His Majesty’s unhinged wife,” the first man continues.
The men matter and some laugh, making derogatory comments about you. How they would still bed you, regardless of how insane you were.
You and Rosé eye each other in confusion and quietly move closer. The men sit at a table with a box of spirits.
The first man you recognized as the head of the army, Hendery. “At least, the Queen cannot fuck that prince again. His Majesty saw to it.”
Your heart clenches as do your fists.
The guards clink their bottles together. “Hear, hear.”
Hendery continues, “And I ended him with that final blow, didn’t I?”
The guards cheer. As you hear this news, you carefully scan the room. You recognize all of the guards. None of them appeared to be shocked at the news. You wondered how many of these men were present the day of Lucas’ murder.
Rosé scares you then. Her complacent nature had completely shattered. She grips the wood of the room tightly as her knuckles whitened.
You still didn’t have the full details of what happened the day Lucas died. But it seemed the Lord had smiled down at you and decided to give you the truth.
Hendery commands the room, only stumbling every now and then from how inebriated he was. “His Majesty shot him like any deer in that forest. Very near to the heart. His Majesty had improved greatly in his archery skills. He was able to put it to practice, at the very least.”
He continues as the men’s cheers become all muttered and incoherent from the alcohol.
“And then Doyoung and I picked up his body and pushed him against a tree. And I stabbed him really neatly in the heart. And now, no more Lucas.” He laughed.
Rosé pulls you away now. “y/n, he must be punished.”
You open your mouth in disbelief. “What?”
Rosé retorts, “I know you had a hand in Ten’s death. So why should this be any different?”
“What?” You ask her. How the hell did she figure it out?
“Lucky guess.” She shrugs. “Your reaction was the confirmation I needed.”
Sweet Rosé was not to be underestimated you thought. She could be as cold and calculating as the next person.
“Come on,” she goaded, “You want to end his pathetic existence as much as I do.”
Of course you did. It was all you could think about the minute he admitted to fatally stabbing Lucas.
You shake your head. “You can be better than me, Rosé. I can do this on my own.”
Rosé takes your hand and leads you to the stables. “Your hands already have enough blood on them. Let me take some of that burden.”
You protest more but Rosé won’t have it. The gears in her head were moving a mile a minute and you had no idea what she had in store for Hendery.
A few hours passed and the men slowly left the weapons room. Hendery, to your and Rosé’s luck, remained behind.
A sad excuse of a human being, you thought. He was a bully in high school. Belittled the women around him. It blew your mind that he married and procreated.
You would see to it that his family is taken care of when he is gone.
Princess Rosé awaited him. “Commander,” she began.
Hendery stumbles and upon seeing Princess Rosé, he gives her a lewd smile. “Your Highness, what are you doing here alone so late at night? It’s dangerous for a princess to be unattended.”
She plays him. “I’ve never felt so safe, having the commander of the royal army with me.”
Hendery slides his arm around her, groping her bottom. Rosé flinches and hides her distaste.
Hendery replies, “Allow me to escort you back to the palace.”
Rosé shakes her head. “Actually, there is one place I wanted to go. With you.”
Hendery smiles wide, like he’d successfully gotten the biggest kill in a hunt
Rosé leads him to the stables, where you wait in the shadows.
You trip Hendery as he walks in. “Wha-“ He starts.
He groans in pain as you quickly tie rope tightly around his right leg.
“What are you-who is that?” Hendery asks, dazed.
“It’s His Majesty’s unhinged wife, of course,” you say, echoing his words back at him.
Hendery sobers up as you bring a lamp close to your face. “Y-your Majesty?!”
Rosé takes the other end of the rope to an occupied stable, where Lucas’ horse Hazel resides for her visit.
She greets Hazel quietly and Hazel nuzzles her, trusting her completely. It seemed Hazel had added Rosé into her circle of trust. Rosé ties the other end of the rope around Hazel’s left hind leg.
“Alright, girl,” she whispers, “We’re going to go for a ride.”
Hendery panics as he sobers up even more. “What are you doing?”
You swiftly bind him with rope so he can’t use his arms. “That’s for you to find out, commander.”
Hendery is about to speak up by you bind his mouth shut as well.
Rosé gets up on Hazel. “y/n, will you join us?”
You nod. “I’m ready.”
You get up on Hazel and sit behind Rosé. She spurred Hazel forward with her heels. Hazel starts off slowly, moving out of the stables.
Hendery feels his body move forward as the rope pulls him.
You and Rosé ignore Hendery’s protests. Rosé beckons for Hazel to run faster. You make it to the grassy field where the horses can ran freely. Hendery already suffers burns from the traction. Hazel has trampled him a couple of times now. He is losing consciousness.
Rosé pulls her last trick and pulls the reins back to stop Hazel and Hendery’s body slips right under and she steps right over him. Spooked, she tramples him even more.
“Well?” Rosé asks you.
You get off of Hazel and check on Hendery.
His body lied there, bruised, lifeless. His right leg was positioned awkwardly having broken a mile back, at the very least.
“He’s dead,” you confirm.
You and Rosé already planned to pin the murder on Doyoung, for he was just as responsible for Lucas’s death. Doyoung wanted to overthrow Hendery for a while and the guards confirmed it when questioned.
Doyoung was sentenced to death by decapitation.
Rosé returned to the Park Estate. You both continued your friendship, retiring from your murderous tendencies. As you have avenged the man you loved.
————
[June 1897]
Months have passed and the kingdom celebrated their beloved Queen’s birthday. You were still in mourning but everyone was relieved to see your enchanting smile again. The kingdom had a strong and capable leader in you.
As the citizens adored you, the palace staff grew to respect you. No whispers of “simpleton Queen” ever slipped from their mouths again. Most respected you. The skeptical ones feared you. No one dared to defy you now so long as they treated you with respect.
Seulgi had always been your most loyal servant so you elevated her position in the household. She and her family could live comfortably, as well. You made sure all of your trusted servants received fair payments.
You tracked down Miss Oral and the other servants who Ten fucked around with. Just as they themselves were loose, their lips were even looser. You dismissed them all from the palace. As for Jade’s family, you pardoned them for they didn’t sleep with your husband multiple times.
As for the guards who knew about Lucas’ murder, you had them dishonorably charged from the army. Most of them were slackers anyway, uncommitted to protecting the kingdom. They only cared about their titles. You needed to hire truly honorable men for the army and you knew just the right person to lead the new wave.
You welcomed Kahei and her family to move into the kingdom. They lived next to your mother and became friends. Only you and your mother knew of the actual identity of Lucas’s family. To everyone else, you claimed them to be distant relatives that you looked out for. Kahei and her family were also given the royal treatment. In a matter of time, you would let them join you in the palace, where they rightfully belonged. Beside you.
Yangyang was in the running to be the next commander of the royal army, outranking several of the other guards, much to their dismay. You knew it was a matter of time before he was given the official title.
Rosé visited you from time to time. You have become close friends, much to the shock of the public. It was believed that mourning the loss of your husbands brought you closer together.
If they only knew the true hell you both endured.
You had no plans to remarry. Your heart remained with Lucas. Even if there were only memories left. Lucas was buried, per his family’s wishes, in his summer home in Wanderlust. You told Rosé about Lucas’ true origins and instead of punishing you and his family, she befriended all of you. You, the twins, Rosé, and Lucas’ family went to visit Lucas’ grave and decorated it with flowers.
It was a bittersweet summer. You were in Wanderlust with Lucas, just not in the way either of you had hoped for. You knew he was with you in spirit and just like Kahei told you the first time you visited her, you two could meet again in the next life.
Hopefully, without the menacing presence that also lingered in your memories. Ten must have been an evil incubus that escaped hell, but you hoped that you sent him back to suffer, eternally.
Fin.
#wayv ten#wayv au#wayv lucas#ten x you#ten x reader#lucas x you#lucas x reader#wayv smut#nct smut#ten smut#lucas smut#wayv yukhei#wayv x you#yukhei smut#nct angst#wayv angst#nct prince au#nct royal au#nct romance#nct boyfriend#wayv boyfriend#wayv moodboard#nct moodboard#wayv ff#nct ff#nct x reader#nct x you#wayv x reader#wayv scenario#wayv series
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Heatwave Drabble #6: lovesick
(sorry i had to insert these gifs. if this isn’t the taehyung you’re imagining for heatwave, you’re unfortunately wrong.)
[Heatwave // Godless // Heatwave Drabbles] <- read first! :)
Pairing: Taehyung x reader
Summary: You fall feverishly ill one morning, and the responsibility of looking after you falls onto Taehyung’s lap. Of course, there wouldn’t be a problem with that at all if the both of you weren’t so confused about your feelings for each other.
Genre: drabble, fluff, crack, little angst, fwb au, roommate au, f2l
Warnings: tsundere!y/n being bratty as usual, boyfriend but not ur boyfriend!taehyung who all our hearts belong to, “I love you so much” (I feel like that should be a warning lol), maybe confession who knows
Word count: 6.5k
A/N: It’s been over a month holy shit. But VOILA! Enjoy the calm before the storm and try not to bust a lung from all these feelings running wild. (requested by my bb @taexxxiiaa.)
.
Taehyung should have known something was wrong with you when you didn’t protests against him slipping into your room last night and crawling beneath your covers.
Usually, you would at least act like you don’t want him there, complain about his invasion with that trademark eye roll of yours, before snuggling back to his warmth, ass conveniently wiggling onto his poorly-hidden boner. His hands would quickly find your hips, one of them creeping under your shirt to cup your breast, lips latched onto the cradle of your neck. And before either of you knew it, he would be inches deep inside you, both still dressed because impatience and neediness gave way, and shedding of clothing isn’t necessary during copulation anyway.
But last night, all you did was hum a pleasant sigh at his arrival, eyes not even opening as you pull his arm tighter around your waist. Taehyung fell asleep beside you within minutes.
You have been feeling slightly under the weather lately, sniffly nose and funky throat. Most do in the harsh winds of January where winter has still yet to defrost into the floral bloom of spring. But when Taehyung had so much as mentioned the possibility of you maybe having a wee bit of a cold, you had been passionately adamant that you - you - are not one of those commonfolk who catches colds from a slight breeze.
“Do I look like a peasant to you?” You had scoffed in utter dismay at his proposition. The audacity! “I don’t get sick this easily, certainly not before you do. My immune system is superior and that’s a fact.”
However, you are soon to be haunted by your own words because what is a fact is that you are currently shivering in bed beside Taehyung despite your immense radiation of heat, skin scalding to touch, groggy even after ample hours of sleep.
Taehyung is a lazy riser, but your state has spurred his eyes to fly open, springing upright and instantly wide awake. The sheets around you are absolutely drenched in your sweat. As you’re still in the foetal position you had fallen asleep in, he carefully turns you on your back, you hardly rousing from such commotion that would usually wake you up. You would look rather peaceful in your slumber if it weren’t for the perspiration coated all over, damp hair matted to your face, and brows occasionally drawing almost as if in pain. When he places his palm against your forehead, he curses. “Fucking shit.”
You have a fever. That’s just grand, isn’t it? You should have listened when he told you to wear more layers but no, apparently fashion matters so much more than your own health. Superior immune system his ass.
“Hey…” Taehyung nudges your shoulders gently. No response, still shivering in your sleep. “Y/N, wake up.” He prods a little harder this time but, again, to no avail. This isn’t looking good. You’re not even stirring, and he knows you’re much lighter sleeper than he is. Taking your face in his hand, he shakes your face side to side, your heat almost burning his fingers. “Baby, please…”
Nothing.
Cue the panic unleashing in his head.
You have a fucking fever, and you’re unconscious, and you’re shivering like you’re hypothermic, and your forehead feels like a fucking kettle. What the hell is Taehyung supposed to do? He doesn’t know. Of course he doesn’t fucking know. You’ve always been the one to look after him. What does he do now? Should he call the police? Wait no, the ambulance. Yes! The ambulance! This is a medical emergency for sure, it has to be!
He reaches for his phone on the bedside table.
But wait.
As his thumbs hover over his screen, he realises that he doesn’t know the number for the ambulance. Is it just the same number as the police? Holy fuck, what does he do? Why is he so incompetent, what the fuck?
“Taehug…” At the sound of your voice, soft and nasal from your blocked nose, he spins around to you, heart leaping out his chest in relief. With one eye barely open, you’ve lifted your head as much as you can, clammy hand reaching for his jumper to tug him to you.
“Oh my god, are you okay? What the fuck, you scared the shit out of me.” Wasting not a second, he dives back to your side, fingers interlocking yours in a motion that’s like second nature to him. Jeez, you’re sweaty. “How are you feeling?”
The pale absence of tint in your lips speaks for itself. Your eyes are still not fully open, or more like they can’t be. You regard Taehyung with a slightly confused expression. “Burning. My head is killing me.” It’s barely even a whisper. Taehyung’s heart aches. It aches more knowing just how much pain you must be in to forget your pride and admit your vulnerability out loud. You never do that. Not even that time you fell over on the ice-skating rink and broke your wrist, yet insisted it had hurt no more than a bruise, even though Taehyung had seen how much you were wincing when you thought he wasn’t looking.
“Ah, okay, fuck. I don’t know what to do, Y/N. What do you need? Water? Ice packs? Ibuprofen? Are you hungry? Do you want some cereal?” Taehyung is duly aware of how much he currently resembles a concerned mother fussing over her sick child, but he doesn’t care. He’ll be mother hen if he has to.
“Shh… Too loud, Taehub…” Laboriously lifting your arm as if it weighs two tonnes, you silence him with a finger to his mouth. And he shuts up immediately. He shouldn’t, given the circumstances, but he savours your touch as your finger slides down his bottom lip when your arm drops. “Water, please.”
And like that, Taehyung is sprinting to the kitchen for a cool glass of water for you, ignoring the cold that slaps at his bare feet. He has never looked after a sick person before, this is all very nerve-wracking and stressful for him. He is so fast that he arrives back to you with only half the contents of the glass still contained, the rest spilled during his hurried journey.
Taehyung finds you sat up, looking a little more awake than half a minute ago but no more alive. Your hair is tangled the way it always is in the morning, and your face is puffy the way fluffy pancakes rise - the same way that makes Taehyung want to kiss you all over and tell you how much he likes pancakes and he likes you. But god bless, you’re just sat there, spaced out, staring off at the sloth drawings of your bed sheets, you poor thing.
Something clenches in Taehyung from how you kind of light up when you notice his approach, eyes twinkling and corners of your mouth turning up ever so subtly.
“Here.” He breathes, now especially weary of his volume so not to disrupt you. You jump at the cold that’s pressed on your lips, and take the glass from him as he perches by the bed next to you. Not that there was much to begin with, but you down the water like you do with vodka shots during happy hour. “Better?”
With a great sigh, you shut your eyes and shake your head. “No. I feel like we’re in a furnace, and someone is hammering my head.” There is something very gentle about your voice that Taehyung does not recognise at all. It’s soft, shy even, the completely opposite from the way you normally speak. And from the babyish way your lips are jutted out…
Taehyung doesn’t for a second doubt that the fever is frying your brain. Because your mannerism would never be this mild and soft-spoken in your right mind. You haven’t even sworn once despite the condition you’re in; that’s how he knows with absolute certainty that you’re not yourself.
Just as he is about to suggest taking you to the doctor, you pinch the material of your top and begin peeling it off. It rides up your damp skin to reveal your glistening waist. Higher. Over your ribcage. Higher. The underside swells of your breasts peeking through.
All sensible thought vacates him.
Nowadays, not much can fluster Taehyung anymore, so the attack of heat rushing to his face feels rather foreign, strangely tickling his chest. The female body is a frequent sight for him, especially yours, so this really shouldn’t faze him at all. It’s perhaps the context of this situation, how you are hardly conscious, completely vulnerable and beside yourself.
“Stop.” He catches the material of your rising shirt in your hand. You look at him with a cocked head when you notice his prevention, cheeks red from the fever, confusion worn so genuinely that he chokes. “Fuck- Don’t look at me like that while taking your shirt off. Stop taking your shirt off, even.”
“Look at you like what?” Your voice is soft, its usual cockiness absent. Just pure innocence. It shouldn’t suit you given your typical boisterous character, but it strangely does.
“Lookingatmelikesomeinnocentfuckingkittengoddammit.” He mutters under his breath, staring at the wall to avoid that heart-ruining expression of yours as he tugs your top back down. It takes everything in him not to dwell on those perversions. God, what is wrong with him? This is so completely inappropriate.
“But it’s hot…”
At a moment of weakness, Taehyung takes a glimpse at your face and, lo and behold, immediately gets shot in the heart by your beseeching pout. Not to mention the way you’re whining…
Fuck. Taehyung is going to fucking melt.
“Okay, but don’t take off your shirt just like that. Warn me next time.” He grips onto your shirt as tightly as it takes to ground himself, fist rested on your hip. You’re his friend right now. Nothing more. Stop being a sopping melt.
“Okay, sorry. But can I at least change into new jammies? These are too stuffy.” Disgruntled, you plead, eyes wishfully wide.
Jammies? Jammies? Are you kidding him? Taehyung is this close to banging his head against the wall. Who is this person sitting in front of him right now? Because he has never, never, in his two and a half+ years of knowing you, witnessed you like this. Literally who are you?
“Um, er, okay, so- How about, I’ll let you change into some lighter clothes, then we’ll get you to the doctor. How does that sound?” He tucks your hair neatly behind your ears and pluck on your lobe endearingly.
“What? No, please, no!” You throw your hands up and groan, narrowly missing whacking him on the chin. Now, you’re infamous for your stubbornness against medical care, steadfast to your belief that one’s body is sufficient in recovering itself in most cases. No pain killers, no cough drops, no flu medicine. Taehyung theorises that you like to suffer, gives you a good boost of self esteem knowing that you can endure the pain. He knows what you’re like with your pride and ego.
But now is not the time. “Why not? You’re burning up. Don’t be so headstrong.”
“I don’t want to move.” Sniff.
“I’ll carry you.” That makes you pause.
“Taehyung, no! I don’t wanna go.” Tantrum on the brink of bubbling, as you bang your fists against the mattress and cross your arms, frowning in displeasure at him. Ah, there’s the Y/N he knows. “And you better keep your distance too, or else you’ll catch whatever I have.” Sniff.
“I’ll keep my distance if you let me take you to the doctor.” Two can play this game. Taehyung’s stubbornness isn’t to shabby himself. And though in your past arguments, he has usually always been the one to be lenient and back down, he won’t budge this time.
“Stop being fussy, or I won’t drink any water or take any medicine and-”
“Stop being a brat, or I’ll kiss you right now.”
You shut up right away. It’s hard to suppress the smirk of triumph that overcomes Taehyung. “W-What?” You stammer, visibly shying away from you.
“Did I stutter?” He dares to provoke, before swiftly leaning his face into yours.
“Dude!” Even in your sickly state, your reflexes are quick, hand immediately catching over his mouth before he could kiss you. His face stops, inches away from yours, the only barrier between you being your hand. In such proximity, he can feel the heat melting off you, radiating into his bones. Your eyes, wide and panicked. “Are you crazy? You’re going to get ill too.” Taehyung swears the heavy tint in your cheeks is only partially due to the fever. He smiles against your warm palm, making sure to pucker his lips for emphasis of his intention. You are so fun to fluster.
“Then go to the doctor.” His voice his muffled by your hand.
“You’re so stubborn, god!” Oh, the hypocrisy. “Look. The doctor can’t do anything except give me some medicine to decrease my temperature. But fever is good for the body anyway. It’s optimising the temperature for my immune cells to fight off the bugs. This is gonna pass. Stop worrying.”
Lightly, you shove his face away and slide down the bed until you’re buried neck-deep by the covers, mouth pursed in a tight, irritated pout that Taehyung finds adorable.
“Then you shouldn’t have a problem with me kissing you then, if it’s nothing to worry about.” Taehyung hovers over you, dangerously close, and you quickly cover your own mouth this time. This is a fun game, one that he knows he will win. If there is one thing that can overcome your stubbornness, it’s his own health in jeopardy. And Taehyung doesn’t even feel remotely bad for taking advantage of that.
It’s not that he wants to catch this sickness from you… But if that’s what it takes to threaten you to seek medical help, then he’ll do it a hundred times.
Plus, he misses your lips, okay? It’s a win-win situation for him: either he gets to kiss you, or you let him take you to the doctor. Genius.
For a moment, you just stare back at him, fury brewing in those eyes that are no longer hazy from the fever but ablaze with annoyance and displeasure. But he already knows what your answer will be.
“You’re a bully, Kim Taehyung, you’re a fucking bully. I’m not going to speak to you ever again.”
Taehyung chuckles and hauls you out of bed.
.
You sulk at the way to the hospital, not uttering a single word to Taehyung as you swore you would. He’s kind of impressed, actually. Anything he asks you, you would reply with a nod, shake, or shrug. He guesses it’s a combination of your anger and genuine fatigue and light-headedness.
When he tries to loop his arm around yours in the Uber, you let him, but look out the window as if he isn’t right beside you. Hmpf, so this is what he gets for looking after you. Fine, he can handle it.
“Are you just going to ignore my presence, baby?” The pet name is intentional, to tease you further and see if you would break your silence to tell him off.
You don’t fall for it.
Instead, you briefly turn to him, give him a daggered look that says I’ll never suck you off again, and turn back around, pretending to find the empty streets wildly interesting.
“Fine, baby girl. Suit yourself.” Taehyung catches the driver’s amused eyes in the rearview mirror. Something along the lines of: women, am I right? He smiles and rests his head on yours for the rest of the ride.
Upon arrival to the hospital, you silently storm out of the car and register at the reception. Taehyung doesn’t quite understand why you’re so mad, and what exactly you have against doctors that appears to be so personal, but he is finding this rather entertaining.
The two of you are ushered to the waiting room by a kind-looking nurse roughly of his mother’s age, the type of kind that makes you want to pour your heart out and entrust her with all your secrets.
Still not a peep from you. Though many sniffs.
“How are you feeling right now?” He asks as he sits himself down on the seat next to you. It could be wishful thinking but your eyes soften when you look at him. You throw him a thumbs down before returning to the form you are intently filling out.
You are startled when Taehyung takes your chin in his long fingers, pulls you slightly closer to him and plants his lips on your fever-heated cheek. “I’ll get you some water then.” He gets up before he can dwell too long on your reaction, the way you are completely frozen, pen nib pressed so hard on the paper that a blodge of ink has oozed out of the ballpoint. If he dwells too long, he thinks his heart might do a funny thing.
As he walks towards the water dispenser in the corner of the room, he passes the nurse again, who smiles knowingly at him as she heads towards where you are sitting, no doubt to check up on you. God, he wants to spill all his feelings to this nurse. She reminds him of his grandmother when he was young.
Taehyung returns with a cup of cool water, this one more full than the one he’d poured for you this morning. He finds you chatting quietly to the nurse, the face mask she had just handed you resting around your chin, oblivious to his approach.
“You are lucky to have such a great boyfriend, young lady. Trust me, he’s a keeper.” The nurse muses at her.
Taehyung fully expects you to scoff or choke on your own spit, stand up and yell at the clueless woman: WHAT THE FUCK, HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND. EW. WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Because that has totally happened before; people tend to mistaken you two as a couple everywhere you go.
Except... You just blink at the nurse, rather blankly as if trying to comprehend her words. Then you nod.
Just nod.
The paper cup almost slips out of Taehyung’s hand.
“Love, the way he looks at you? Anyone would die to be looked at like that.” The nurse continues.
Taehyung rushes to your side before she can say more.
“Here. Water.” Clearing his throat, he hands you the cup without making any eye contact. He hopes he’s not blushing but the heat rushing to his face says otherwise. When he glances up at the nurse, she is smiling at him as if she knows exactly what is going on in his mind.
“Thanks.” You whisper.
Oh, so you’re back to speaking to him now. Is it because of what she said? When your eyes meet, something clicks. An emotional click that tells him that your annoyance towards him had been a mask for your genuine gratitude. Taehyung’s chest is fuzzy with relief.
Not long later, you are called to the doctor’s room. Taehyung sits waiting for you outside, silently pondering the nurse’s words and your lack of protest.
.
“Come on, Y/N, what’s the point of going to the doctors if you aren’t going to take the medicine they prescribe you?” Taehyung lets out a rumble of frustration. A bottle of water and a packet of pills clutched in one hand, he is this close to plucking his hair out.
“The point of going to the doctors was to get you not to kiss me and catch the same flu. The doctor said this virus is contagious, and could still be at this stage.” Your voice, nasal from your blocked nose, is stifled further by the face mask. Changed into a t-shirt and shorts so you don’t sweat through your clothes again - yes, the shorts, the heatwave shorts - you cross your arms and roll to the other side of the bed. Taehyung’s hand is itching to spank your ass pink.
“That means I’ll probably get ill anyway in the next few days. We literally kissed yesterday.” He points out, and it might be psychological but his head is beginning to hurt a little. Of course, he wouldn’t dare tell you or else you’d turn this around and be the one fussing over him. “Come here.”
Taehyung locks his fingers around your ankles and drags you back towards him, ignoring your feeble squeak. He gives in and smacks your butt lightly.
“Oi!” You twist around and kick the shackles of his grip off. “You dare hit the sick?! My head is killing me as it is.” Sniff.
“Oh, so you admit that you’re sick? Why don’t you take the medicine then?” Forcing you onto his lap, he wrestles your battling arms and hold them in place behind your body. In any other situation, he would be awfully turned on right now. Something about your brattiness is a kink to him.
With the rest of your face covered by the mask, your eyes are fiercely emanating your obstinate defiance. It should be a scary look, your death glare, but after this long, anything you do in Taehyung’s eyes has been reduced to animated cuteness. He feels like he’s the only one who could go up against you like this without cowering. You’ve stopped struggling against his grip now, rather sulking as you’re perched on his thighs. He doesn’t hesitate that you’re unconsciously pouting behind that mask.
“Because I promise I’m going to feel better. Medicine is for the weak. The doctor said herself that the fever will subside tomorrow! Then what’s the point of administering these extra chemicals into my body if I’m recovering on my own?” You whine.
“To help you recover better!”
“Flu medicine is a scam. You’re too gullible-”
“Do you love or care about me at all?”
You tense at his abrupt question that appears out of the blue. “Well... yeah. You-You’re my best friend. Which is why I don’t want you falling sick too, so just shoo.” You’re squirming, trying to brush off your initial surprise at his question which is all the more accentuating your bashfulness. Taehyung just wants to kiss, god dammit.
“Then don’t you know that it’s killing me to see you in pain like this? To see my best friend burning up with a fever and refusing to let me look after her? Are you seriously that cold-hearted to let me suffer like this if you claim to love and care about me?”
Yes, Taehyung is playing this game. Emotional manipulation? Yes. Probably a little bit of a dick move? Yes. But does he care as long as it does the trick? No.
“Bro, you can’t use this against me. Just let me suffer, I like to suffer, this fever feels fucking fantastic.” When he lets your wrists go, you punch his arm lightly, frowning, though he can see the tiniest spark of amusement in your pupils. Not to mention the rise in your cheeks that indicates your attempt in hiding a smile.
“Shut up and be a good girl, or I’ll kiss you right now.” Hands running up your bare legs, he tugs you closer by the hip before resting his arms around your waist. Though you’re arching away, he sees your cheeks rise even higher.
“Stop trying to kiss me.” You groan overdramatically and try to wriggle away; you would think he’s the one with the illness from how much you’re trying to get away from him. When you proceed to clamp both hands over your masked mouth, Taehyung knows he’d sooner receive the ball of your foot to his temple than be able to feel your lips at this rate.
Okay fine, different approach. “I’ll cut my hair off.”
“What? No-nO. Dude that’s not fair, what the fuck?” Your whole body falls limp in defeat in his arms as you wail. Taehyung can’t help but laugh. “Okay I will take the stupid medicine. Please don’t cut your hair.”
“Okay, good girl.” Humming against your neck, he tries to hide the smug grin of his victory. “On one more condition though.”
“Wow, you’re literally using my love for your hair as blackmail, you dick. Spit it out.” He feels your fingers sink through his long untamed curls, tips massaging his scalp like your lover. Taehyung sometimes feels like you love his hair as if it is a completely separate entity from him, like if you could marry his hair, you would.
“Let me kiss your mouth.” He looks up at you, craned neck and sheepish smile. He knows he’s being unfairly demanding, especially of someone who is ill. But it’s been over 12 hours since you have last kissed. 12 hours. Come on. He’s only human.
“Taehyung, I swear to G-” If your legs weren’t straddled around him, he knows his chest would be met with your foot.
“And I swear to God I’ll get a buzz cut.” Not even bluffing. Every other guy goes through a crisis at some point in their life and gets a god awful buzz cut. Nothing special.
“OH MY GOD- NO. BUZZCUT? NO. Okay, okay, quickly kiss me over the mask, then I’ll take the fucking meds.” The utter horror and mortification that detonates across your face has Taehyung cackling. In the back of his mind, he wonders if you’d still like him with no hair. He’s sometimes afraid that you wouldn’t. But then again, he has vomited on your face before, yet you still like him. So there’s that.
“Wait over the mask?” It just registers with him what you said.
“I’m all gross. You don’t want to kiss me on the lips anyway.” Your gaze falls as you sniffle for probably the thousandth time today, hand reaching to scratch the back of your neck but dropping it right away when you realise that it’s a nervous tick.
Taehyung sighs. “Over the mask is better than no kiss. I’ll take it.”
As his face approaches yours, he is keenly aware that you’re unwilling to meet his eyes. Cute. Soon, your eyes are level with each other, yet you only dare peer at his nose. He boops his nose to yours, breath separated only by the thin material of the mask, waiting for you to lean in.
But when you make no move to initiate it, Taehyung smiles. God, since when did you become so shy. He knows he tends to have this effect on people but since when did he turn you into a blushing, eye-avoiding mess?
He doesn’t expect much when he places his mouth over yours. The gauzy material of the mask grazes his lips, smelling like the overly-sanitised stench of hospital. So he is surprised to find something in him tingle slightly, even despite such physical obstruction of intimacy. The white fabric folds over the curve of your lips to mould with his. He feels a rush of cool from the sharp inhale through your nose.
He pulls away sooner than you want. Your expression is confused by the short duration of the kiss, so not what you expected and is used to.
“I’m sorry, that’s not going to do it for me.” Taehyung rasps. And with that, he pinches the mask down and presses fully onto your lips.
Your heat that greets him sends a surge down his spine. Jeez, you are burning. But he’s pretty sure he is too, from the way he can hear his blood pounding in his ear. You are completely static at first, frozen in place from shock of his boldness. He can wager what exactly is going on in your head. This boy. This boy has some fucking nerve.
And that is correct, he does have some fucking nerve.
But soon, you are kissing him back, probably not out of your own free will but simply from the natural instinct that overrides you when met with his lips. Nowadays, kissing each other feels like sinking into your bed after a long day at college. Comfortable, heart-warming. Kissing other people doesn’t feel half as nice, just like how no bed ever feels like your bed.
Taehyung can sense how much you’ve been longing for this as well from the low gentle vibrations of your throat as you purr. Your entire face is a few degrees hotter than it normally is, and worry is gnawing at the back of his brain almost irrationally. Because he knows that as much as you are bickering with him and acting playful, your head must be hammering. The last time he’d checked, your temperature was still 39˚C.
He has to be the one to pull away again. “You’re burning.” He watches your eyes linger on his glistening lips before glancing up. “How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine…” You whisper, leaning up to peck his lips several more times. There are moments where Taehyung’s heart completely clenches, like seizes. You say you don’t want to kiss him for his own good, yet here you are savouring his taste like you can’t get enough. Fuck. Taehyung is feeling things.
“Are you sure? Here, take this.” He passes you the bottle of water and packet of medication that were carelessly tossed to the side when he was busy holding you. Without protest, out of fear for the fate of Taehyung’s hair no doubt, you pop a pill out of its foil bubble. “Two pills at once, three times a day.”
“Yes, dad.” You roll your eyes and put them in your mouth, swallowing without so much of a gag.
Taehyung sucks in. “Don’t say the d-word.”
“Wh- I purposely said dad, not daddy.” Flabbergasted by his implication, you scoff and remove yourself from his lap, rolling back under the covers until no more than a burrito with your face peeking out. “I can’t believe you are even thinking about that, nympho.” Sniff again, though you make no effort to put your mask back up.
“Hey, I’ve been so good, I was just warning you! That’s a triggering word for me.” Taehyung joins you under the cool duvet. “You have absolutely zero right to call me a nympho. Do I have to remind you of the time you called me out of my lecture so we could fuck in the toilets in the middle of a school day? Or that time in the library-”
“Shhh. I’m ill, my memory is a little hazy.” You smile, rather wholesomely, at him.
Sometimes, when he looks at you, he can look through the narrow windows of your ego and view the persona that lie within. Just a girl who loves kisses and cuddles and making bad decisions at 3am.
And maybe a girl who loves him.
.
You fall asleep fairly quickly after the medication. One would have thought that would give Taehyung plenty of time to make use of his day, maybe start an abstract painting or finish his coursework due in a week and a half. But nope.
Taehyung has discovered that he has an extremely irrational fear of you being sick. He simply couldn’t stop himself from going into your room every 15 minutes, making sure that you’re still breathing and placing cold towels on your sweat-beaded forehead to help your temperature drop. You are in deep sleep, shallow breaths, no eye movement. He may have snuck in a few cheek kisses just to check if you’re really asleep, and you were. He still kissed you a bit more anyway.
After a whole evening of restlessness, he finally decides to give up and go to bed. He debates sleeping with you, just for his own peace of mind, but you probably want your own space anyway.
So, after brushing his teeth and changing into his so-called jammies - he will give you shit for that once you feel better - he quietly creeps into your room one last time with a fresh towel. With soundless steps, he perches lightly on the edge of your bed, eyes adjusting to the pitch darkness.
This time, you wince slightly at the cold wetness of the towel, rousing, but not completely conscious.
“Taehyung?” Your voice is incredibly hoarse, barely a croak, so he scrambles for your bottle of water and feeds it to you.
“Hey, it’s me.” He murmurs softly, and resumes wiping your forehead gently.
“Wh… are you do..g here?” Incoherent syllables indicate how you’re mostly still asleep.
“Looking after my baby. I’ll go to bed and leave you to rest soon.”
When your hand abruptly flies up and clamps around his, Taehyung jumps. You’re freezing. “No. Don’t go, please.”
His mind doesn’t know what to respond to first, your sudden cold sweats, or your request for him to stay. His chest squeezes. “I- H- You’re freezing, Y/N.”
“I know, but please stay.” In the dark, Taehyung can only barely make out the shape of your face and see that your eyes are still shut. Maybe you’re dreaming.
Please stay.
“Okay, don’t worry, of course I’ll stay. But just please tell me how you’re feeling?” He climbs in at the other side of the bed and presses his palm on your neck. Your temperature regulation is fucked up by this fever. Seeing you like this makes something in him crack.
“Finenowthatyou’rehere.” You snuggle up to his chest and mumble into his hoodie, already beginning to fall back into heavy slumber.
Chest squeeze, again.
Taehyung feels his own heart pounding. These words of endearment are rare from you; he’s going to hold on to them for as long as he can. He plants a kiss on your forehead. “Of course I’m here. I’m always here.”
He is such a sap, he knows, a hopeless fool. But you’re his missing part, he feels it in his bones. He hopes that he’s yours too.
Then you mutter something inaudible into his chest. The iciness of your touch flails his back as your hands reach beneath his hoodie to hold him tighter. There’s something about the way the scene is set, how you’re delirious from your fever, clinging onto him in complete darkness of your room. Taehyung’s emotions are flooding.
“What was that?”
“I love you so much, Taehyung.”
His brain short-circuits entirely. It just switches off.
I
Love
You
So
Much,
Taehyung.
Words that he’d never expected to hear from you, not tonight, not any time in the near future, and certainly not unprovoked like this, utterly at your own accord.
Then his brain turns itself back on again, and is instantly swept away by the chaos that breaks out. “W... What do you mean by that?” He needs to know that he’s interpreting this correctly and rather than hearing what he wants to hear.
“Mmmm...” You groan sleepily. Taehyung shouldn’t take this too seriously right? You’re not even in your right mind. Your head is still buried in him, inhaling his scent like he is your oxygen. “You know what I mean. I just mean I love you a lot more than I love myself.” Sniff. “I love you big and tall and wide. I love you and only you, that’s it.”
I love you a lot more than I love myself. I love you big and tall and wide. I love you and only you, that’s it.
Taehyung feels a sting in his eye, what the fuck.
He isn’t moving. He doesn’t think he can. And so you just lay there in each other’s arms, in complete silence, but also not silence because you had just declared your love for him and all his thoughts are screaming.
What the fuck is ‘I love you big and tall and wide’? He fucking loves you big and tall and wide too.
Okay. Okay. Let’s stay calm.
No. He loves you.
He has loved you for a very long time, and a part of him has always known. It’s you. It’s always you. The way you met. The way you found each other. The way everything fell in place in his life after you. It’s fate. It’s all fate. And it’s all you. Because Taehyung is not a violent person by any means, but he would kill for you, he would do anything for you. It scares him.
And that’s just the funny way that love works. A lot of the times, it is standing right there in front of you, waving its hands and shouting for you attention. And you dismiss it at first because you mistake it for friendship, even though there’s an inkling in you that has considered the possibility that it’s more than that. So you go about your life, day by day with this person who you love but don’t know you love yet, collecting your little moments together into a heart-shaped glass jar without realising it. Until one day you look at the jar and see that it’s completely full.
His heart is full. His heart is full of you.
He doesn’t know what to do or what that means. He isn’t even sure of his own feelings, whether it is a heat of the moment confusion, or a cauldron of bubbling emotions at the brim of spillage.
But no, he is sure.
He knows that he loves you. He knows it.
Because why else would nothing boil his blood more than the sight of you in the arms of someone else? Why else would nothing hurt more than seeing you in pain like this? Why else would nothing bring him more joy than simply sitting next to you, being able to touch you, making you laugh? And why else would it feel like he can spend the rest of forever just looking at you, memorising your details while you play with his hair that you love so much?
He loves you.
It is perhaps the darkness that gives him such courage, because he gathers himself and says, “I love you. So fucking much, I love you, Y/N. I thought I knew what love was before you, I thought I was happy and content with my life. But now, I can’t even remember what I was like without you. Because that guy wasn’t me. I’m not me without you. And I love you. I entirely belong to you. And I love you.
“I love you a lot more than I love myself. I love you big and tall and wide. I love you and only you, that’s it.”
And it’s like a weight has been lifted off his chest. His insides aren’t twisted into knots anymore. Suddenly, he can see with such clarity. In the dark, he only sees you.
He sees you fast asleep against his chest. Arms looped around his waist in a way that makes him never want to leave his bed.
Taehyung takes a deep breath and exhales. Maybe from relief.
You are asleep. You hadn’t heard.
Yes, he is definitely relieved. He doesn’t think he’s ready to face the consequences of his feelings yet if he had really just poured his heart out to you. You probably didn’t mean it that way anyway; he is overthinking.
But the ‘I love you so much, Taehyung.’ The heartfelt passion in your voice could not have been his imagination.
So, with a great sigh, he makes use of the fact that you’re asleep to rehearse it a few more times.
“I love you. I love you. I love you.”
.
02/02/19
© Copyright 2020
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@taexxxiiaa @shookpreme @taetaeobsessed @tangledsparkles @nonexistentfucks @evilkookie @nbiased95 @taehyungmakesmeoof @itscalledgayhoney @tahaing @deliciouslydisturbed365 @expensive-bangtan-girl @jwlmnbt @herakimkim @dnyad @kaepjjang365 @gingerpeachtae @spring2787 @askingtheimportantthingshere @casualminiaturetimemachine @xblackclover13x @vasysauce @deadinsidebitch2412 @emiyooa @i-dont-even-know-fck @chimycthulhu @gixanjos @hisunshiine @xtaeyi @softjellyjimin @bluemooncnblue @malfeitofeitto @bangtanfancamp @keopitae @out-of-jams @camilaxpolanco @d-noona @haechanspudu @dawnispeaceshe
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techno liveblog w timestamps lets go for ‘a new home (dream SMP)’ stream
good laugh times: 00:13:50, 00:14:55, 1:38:45, ik it doesnt look like a lot but like u should watch the stream anyway bc philzas there and his laugh is amazing and they just go so well together
times techno calls phil his friend: 00:6:00 00:37:00, 00:45:17, 0:1:09:30, 01:11:15, 01:26:35, 01:50:05, 2:35:00
FSDJKFAF;LS HE KEPT THE MUTED INTRO IN JHKADFLS (ends at 00:1:25)
i like how, when faced with Leaving Youtube, techno would choose to be an author. i want a book by techno. reblog this if u want a book by techno (with an audiobook by him as well) /hj. 00:1:33
i love how he says ehhhhhh so much lskjhdfas (abt 2 mins in)
who the FUCK just remembers that the word fortuitous exists wtf 00:5:17
00:7:45 PHILZA TIME PHILZA TIME LETS GO
00:8:55 tommy time :/
0:14:10 rANBOO JUST WALKS IN, LOOKS AROUN ,AND LEA VE SIM CRYING
i love how much philza laughs at technos jokes bc pretty much everything he says IS a joke he just says it in such a serious voice that p much everyone else is like,,,yeah,,,,yup,,,,and phil just knows when hes joking and his laugh is so good with technos voice. sbi? whos that? i only know philza and technoblade
00:19:30 ghostbur joins! this is my first time hearin ghostbur btw
00:19:40 haha string axe technos so bad at crafting what a fool /j
00:21:07 ghostbur: “Even I remember how to make a fishing rod!” ghostbur u just MURDERED technoblade oh my god im gonna scream hgjdfksla i love ghostbur so much
00:23:55: GHOSTBUR NO!! DON’T DIE YOU’LL BECOME A DOUBLE GHOST!!!! -technoblade 2020
00:24:55 technoblade neva lies -guys he almost did the technoblade neva dies ahh!!!!!
i havent heard anyone talk about this but techno has a dedicated roleplay voice. like listen to him talk to tommy at 00:25:08. his voice gets more even, he uses names a lot more often (seriously, listen to his theseus speech. he says tommy so often, its incredible.), and his voice gets,,,,deeper? not deeper but smoother, in a way, and he repeats what he says for emphasis instead of humor. and his voice is louder, and he seems more assertive.
00:27:30 philza: where we goin, by the way? techno: to our- to my new home.
techno cmon let phil live w u wed get so much more content cmonn
00:28:50 the fact that he calls the manhunt theme “dream music” makes me laugh so hard. and then his version of it,,,,,m love he (also he sings it here and at 01:14:20)
00:35:10 why is ranboo so cryptic im-
why does he just casually know the word sentry wh at i hate him 00:39:45
this is the worst sentence (structurally) ive ever heard techno say im gonna cry 00:49:33 ‘im too busy thinkin of new ideas to sleep so i could actually execute them’ and tubbos *oh?* after is just hdsfgkjlka
LKSJDHFJK 00:51:49
00:54:30
techno: thats one of dreams powers, he can just stop the rain
tubbo, quietly: like jesus!
i love them sm dsfhkjla they kept going but i jus gdfhjksa jesus has op
techno @ being the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans: haha funnie!!
techno @ having fun w religious stuff: i wILL BE CANCELLED NO-
00:58:10 “hey if ur [ghostbur] a ghost, do instant damage potions heal you now?” “...no,, they hurt me still :(” DSIULZKJHFSLKFJH
01:04:00 his brother named the cow bob im- aww
also he has a fanart wall again!!!
01:09:30 “phil, you’re the only friend i have left in this world.” aWWWWW HE GAVE HIM THE COMPASS
“dont smoke, it’s a joke” -technoblade 01:14:15
ROLEPLAY SPEECH VOICE IS BACK AT 1:16:10 “they pillage my base for everything i’m worth, they use me for the revolution, but oooOOOoo i took a pickaxe with his consent? oOOOooOo i’m a thief!”
holy shit 01:17:15 “you know what, phil? for you, the world, alright? it’s fine.” oH MY GOD HHHHGHG (context, right before they were arguing bc phil took some blocks from his base and techno thought that when he said phil could take anything he meant from the chests)
the COMIDY of that villager coming in and sleeping while techno was readin donos at 01:22:05 RIGHT AFTER phil freaked out abt inturruptin his dono readin im SFDHKJLA:
techno talkin bout the winstreak and how he wont be able to live up to that sort of playin at 01:22:30ish is super important and ill transcribe it tomorrow, but if u can id highly rec watchin it.
01:24:20 “[readin dono] what’s your favorite movie? uh, the princess bride is pretty good” techno ily that movie rocks also he said it so fast like hes ashamed of it noo
techno says no to canon ranboo son btw! 01:25:30
01:25:55 “i wasnt in that story, therefore it doesnt matter” all of technoblr be like
01:37:49 is great lemmie transcribe
“how have you still not gotten a second monitor?? holy shit.”
“let me tell you something. and im only telling you this because i know that so many people in the chat are gonna be furious. so i recently realized- i think the second monitor can just be any ol’ monitor, right? you literally just plug it in, and its set up? well i mean you have to turn on some settings, but like, thats it, or something?”
“yeah,,,,, uh techno you fuckin destroyed my chat, by the way, oh my god, [earlier techno told his viewers to twitch prime philza] there has been like 40 primes just flying through”
“yeahhh twitch prime!!! twitch prime philza yeahh!!! so anyways the other day, i like, i looked to my left, and realized that my old monitor has been like, five feet away from where i sit and stream for the last three years?”
“oh my god...”
“so i- i literally do not have to leave my room to set up a second monitor and i havent. and i’m still usin my laptop for this stream.
“is this gonna be one of those situations where you like, you have a thing, you just refuse to do the thing?”
“listen, my desk is-
“yOU STILL HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE!!!”
“AHHHH I HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE! I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY MCC COIN! DUDE I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY ONE MILLION SUBSCRIBER PLAQUE! ITS STILL THERE RIGHT BEHIND ME! ITs sTILL IN THE BOX! i never made a video on it....”
“bruhhhhh [philza laughs] thats FREE VIEWS what are you doing??”
“ill open it at 8 mil :/.”
“you could LITERALLY make a video of you just like, throwing it off a wall, and then thumbing up, like doing a thumbs up, and then that would be it. 10 seconds. ten seconds. thumb and elbow in shot. [laughs]”
techno is such a disaster i love him
01:34:18 the way techno says “tommy, that statement has NEVER been true” i dont like sayin i simp for block men but GOD sometimes his voice is nicer than usual hhhgn
“man i sure wish tommyinnit was in this stream” -nobody ever (just after previous timestamp)
01:40:15 is fuckin hilarious and im actually crying oh my god techno just says things and says them well with a completely straight face how does he do it
i cannot WAIT until theres a president w the last/first name andy so we can say president andy and think abt technoblade
IM CRIASDNGUSFHD 01:44:38 PHILZA LOOK OUT LOOK OUT PHILZA LSKJDAFJASD;LKF
i love when techno talks abt his vids. like u can tell he puts a lot of thought into the vids (esp these ones) and like at 01:47:00 he talks abt the “I DIDNT PUT DEAPTH STRIDER ON THOSE BOOTS, FUNDY!” and how its just that creepin realization that you were doomed from the start and how he made the armor, he isnt intimidated by the netherite bc he didnt enchant it all the way and only he knows that,,, and i just,,,hgg he
he reveals that hes writin the next arc at 01:48:00: “oh, speakin of arcs, chat, i’m writing the next arc. so, you know. hope nothin bad happens in two weeks, chat!” IM SO EXCITED like he clearly has his character fleshed out and is SO good at writing and retellin history im so so excited to see where he takes it AHHHH and also taht means he might stream more bc he might make his character more important (keep in mind this is the guy who wrote self insert hypixel fanfics. he has no shame in puttin himself first and i respect him so much for it)
01:51:20 “they’re tryin to get a second customer but they’re riskin their first” is lowkey a good line
has anyone else noticed that techno says wise a lot? like at 01:55:10 he literally says “wise dragon armor” as a joke but like i think he says wise so much BECAUSE of skyblock like hjkfdsla
01:57:30 techno plea se eat
ok 1:58:45 is hilarious and all but at the end of his ramble he says “come back, i miss you” and lowkey im crying
techno needs to stop knowing his audience more than we know ourselves im hsfkjda 02:05:25 “the chat’s spammin ‘eat technoblade, eat!’ like they’re not gonna start, like, theyre not gonna get super sad if i ended the stream right now, like theyre not gonna all cry ‘i miss technoblade *sniffs* why- whyd he leave to eat food, why did he listen to our advice noooo’”
02:14:50 NEW VIDEO POGGGG CARL THE HORSE POGGGGGG NOT A STREAM HIGHLIGHT POGGGGG
02:17:40 “i could start a potato farm out here to show how much ive changed” techno last time u made a potato farm u started an entire war that lasted a year that does NOT say calm and retired to me lskgdfjagsldj
02:23:00 why does techno just reference greek mythology so much. makin me scared for his arc.
also he talks abt smp earth a lot in this stream i love it so much
i also just. love?? how much sbi respect tommy like they bully him but when talkin bout him they just have so much respect for how much work he puts into youtube and i just,,,,hgnn they r friends
02:33:13 sbi streamer house lets go cmon
02:34:15 “i think if i streamed every day i could keep up” on one hand YE S but on the ohter oh god techno no we have to keep up tho
hearing techno say “violence isnt the answer” is so scary 02:35:40
02:37:30 technosneeze
hiS BROTHER SENT HIM 46 DISCORD MESSAGES SFKDJLFLKASF 2:49:25 i love his end screen so much hes just sadness,,,,retirement,,,t,echnoblade,,,the government is going to fall on its own due to lack of organization and ideals,,,,,,subscribe,,,,,sadness,,,,,also 2:50:45 is making me laugh so hard its just sad music and technos like??? whys phil in my house drinking milk?????
overall, fantastic stream, if ya want some chill techno philza content i highly recommend.
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omg werewolf matsukawa elaborate i want dem hcs
ok so ive got this horrible word doc with my jambled mess of a concept for this witch makki werewolf matsun fic im writing its like 3% done expect it within 2 business years
(edit. this post is too long but i cant stop typing this is good)
werewolf matsun is the SEXIEST idea ever anyone thats done it is doing gods work because that shit is hot . its fucking sexy okay
in my barely formed au he becomes a werewolf in third year
he hears about weird sounds in the forest at night ok
and he convinces witch hanamaki that they shld camp out and see what it is
because he’s been so interested in the witchy supernatural shit since even before he met him
and hanamaki is like okay fine But im wearing my warding pendent and matsukawa is like WHEN WILL U ADMIT YOU’RE A WITCH and hanamaki, mid-putting on his witch hat, ruffles his hair and says idk what ur talking about
they camp out and they’re just bantering and its cute and fun for 2 hours then
matsun hears growling and snapping noises and he’s like hanamaki stay in the fuckin tent
and obviously hanamaki is like on god that is the stupidest thing uve ever said issei no
and matsukawa steps outside and he holds a hand back to stop makki and he steps out and looks around, eyes narrows
and he’s like … straightening up and furrows his brows and ‘theres nothing here’
and he feels like everything is slow and odd and unreal and he turns and sees bright, yellow eyes and he hears the snarl and jerks back
and he’s being attacked and leaped upon and he shouts curses and screams and theres sharp teeth at his side and the smell of matted fur
and hanamaki sprints out and ?? magic spells it away (leave me alone)
what is the spell? what kindof witch is hanamaki? what does he say?
(begone thot!)
the wolf creature howls and thuds off, fast and loping and hanamaki turns and he’s panicked and is like ‘issei? oh FUCK’
matsukawa is like fuck fuck fuck
leaning against a tree and lightheaded and he collapses, head back against the trunk and sweat pouring down his temples, iron in his mouth where hes biting his tongue to keep from scremaing at the sharp pain
touches his side and his fingers come away bloody
his breath is heavy and hes like takahiro im dying
and hanamaki’s dropping down beside him and lifts his arm and says shut the fuck up you’re not dying you asshole and hes sniffling
and matsuns like im sorry i dragged u out here and hanamaki’s like shut up shut up. issei. shit . issei you were right
and hes like wh what was i right about and hes like you were right. im a witch . and youre not fucking dying here, asshole
issei mumbles fuck yeah and does like a little fist pump
and he whispers a spell to carry him over back to his house
and he bandages him up and matsun is tired and in pain and staring at him in the moonlight
MONDAY
go to school and matsun has white bandages wrapped around his side hidden under his shirt and hes a little scraped up even though hanamaki healed and cleaned up as much as he could
someones like oooh matsukawa your arm is scraped up wtf
and hes like yeah man i got in a fight to protect takahiros honor
makki’s like yeah…. :/// he lost
and matsuns like shut up asshole and theyre laughing and theyre good theyre okay
half way through the school day, long and tired and the bell seems louder and harsher and shriller and everything is too bright and loud and making his eyes and ears hurt
in the bathroom matsun takes off the tape bc hes feeling nauseous and everything feels a little too much for some reason hes assuming bc of the wound, maybe its infected
and he checks it while hes inside and the bandages come off and
its clean no bite no blood no mark
and he stares at it and says what the fuck and texts hanamaki
and hanamaki sees the text and its just ‘SOS BATHROOM NOW PLELASE’
asks his teacher to let him go to the bathroom and he steps into the bathroom and matsun spins around and gestures at his side and chest wordlessly
hanamaki like blinks at the sight of matsuns abs and then blinks again at the healed skin and hes like what the fuck
so
he has sharper vision and sense of smell and hearing
and hes like takahiro……..everything feels horrible and too much and hanamaki’s like ok so what do u want me to do knock u out so u don’t feel anything? and matsukawa’s like huh actually and hana’s like Shut up Dumbass
werewolf matsukawa suddenly stronger and hanamaki so so bitter about it ignoring his personal ‘im attracted to him’ feelings and pretending hes mad abt the super strength
matsukawa’s eyes glinting yellow on occasion and hanamaki trying not to scream bc god that’s sexy
the day they see the healed skin they like walk home silent and shell shocked
matsukawa staring hollowly at the sidewalk his posture lost
hanamaki squinting off into the distance
makki opening his mouth angrily at one point
only to close it defeatedly bc he cant even……
a conversation in hanamaki’s bedroom along the lines of
‘issei why is my life literally teen wolf why am I stiles from teen wolf’
matsun perks up ‘oh that’s dylan o briens character right? does that make me derek !!!’
and hanamaki turns from where hes muttering angrily and squints at him and says slowly
‘why the fu- dude? u r scott ??? because u are a FUCKING WEREWOLF ??????? why would u be derek ???? ur my best friend that turned into a GODDAMN WEREWOLF-‘
‘okok calm down hiro fine fine chill out‘
matsuns like slumping like ‘ugh, scott. i don’t wanna be scott hes painfully straight-‘
and hanamakis like throwing his hands up and shouting like ‘SO THEN !! why would u want to be derek!!!’
and issei’s like ‘…….nevermind we r not in the state to have a conversation about teen wolf, a show neither of us finished and obviously dont have any knowledge about’
im gonna have it properly set in 2013 itll be so cringey and fun
matsukawa also has insomnia and and gets migraines sometimes
and hanamaki’s witchy incense smelling house and bedroom having him nodding off so easily and he sleeps over a lot
especially after he gets bitten, because the migraines get worse
moreso near the full moon
and he comes in through the window and hanamaki is half asleep but always automatically pulls up his blanket and lets him in
big spoon matsun
he curls into his chest as best as he can, pressed tight between the wall and matsukawa
also i have this
italics: makki
bold: mattsun
list of signs pointing towards issei probably being a werewolf:
got bit by a giant dog-creature the bite mark disappeared next day (???? freaky shit)
sudden super healing and durability (useful for when oikawa serves the ball into your head – lmfao)
sudden heightened senses (my headaches r .. multiplying - :( )
sudden super strength (fuck u issei – i didn’t ask to be bitten takahiro – oh no u were bitten how sad for u and ur six pack – the werewolf actually decided i deserve super strength bc of how cool i am – and immeasurable pain every full moon too huh ???? – ...sacrifices were made)
90% sure he got stupider – sign of a dog brain ?? (FUCK OFF – do u want me to explain what a percentage is <3 – no </3)
hair growth (wtf does that mean ??? – it means i suddenly have more chest hair its very weird – ngl to u u were already pretty hairy - fucker)
eyes turn yellow sometimes (wait, really????? – yes its so fucking weird – that sounds fucking epic actually – no comment)
big dick energy went up the ROOF (ok that’s enough asshole – tell me im lying hiro.)
edit: ok the full moon happened we’re all traumatized and hes definitely a FUCKING werewolf.
ill finish this as a fic one day ill post when i do
might also make a useless porno oneshot with just werewolf matsukawa and ? possibly dancer makki im very into dancer makki atm
long post im very sorry but !!!! thanks for the ask
#ask#digimondestined#matsuhana#my writing#matsukawa issei#hanamaki takahiro#it is 2:30 am#goodnight guys#haikyuu#this is a fuckin mess and my word doc is even messier#hq
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BAU - Types of Yandere
ive gotten back into my weird yandere phase and ive seen literally no yandere bau so ive decided to make my own headcanons on them ;) im gonna do the og team + tara lewis, since im only on season 11. i’m not gonna do anything nsfw unless requested. enjoy!
TW // DARK THEMES, ABUSE, GASLIGHTING, JUST BAD THINGS!! i do not condone any of this behavior!!! this is just for fictional purposes!!!!!
Spencer Reid:
calculated, resourceful, patient, emotional/extremely jealous
he’s gonna fall fast. u could literally do one nice thing for him and hes hooked.
he’ll watch u for sure, pictures of u will cover some secret area in his house
he won’t try to kidnap u, unless he feels like he has no choice.
u get a gf/bf? he’ll panic and grab u.
remember: he has an iq of 184. hes smart smart, so he’ll probably get away with ur kidnapping
if he has u,he’ll be patient then too. probably lock you up in a closet or empty room till uve calmed down.
if u calm down and pretend to love him, he’ll honest-to-god be the best boyfriend
he’ll read to u and treat u like a literal queen, with limitations, of course... until u earn his trust
hes literally the smartest babie so he knows how to break u if u dont listen or if ur trying to escape
good luck trying to escape becuz ur in the hands of a genius and he probably has plans to either: a) prevent u from escaping or b) bring u back if u escape.
Aaron Hotchner:
resourceful, sadist, calculated, strategic
he probably met u at a coffee place or at the park, ur gonna talk and he’ll be smitten but the way u interact with jack will make or break his obsession
if ur good with jack, then ur done. ur his now. sorry i dont make the rules.
if ur bad/not good ig? with jack, then he’ll slowly distance himself and u’ll be free :)
holy shit, he does not mess around
unlike spencer, hotch has social skills lol
he’ll probably try to get close to u and then show his true colors slowly.start showing, very very manipulative
if u start dating, he’ll rush for u to move in and try to get u to slowly only depend on him and only him.
if u don’t fall in love, he’ll maintain distance and slowly integrate himself into ur life until he is THE most important person in ur life.
if u end up dating someone else, he’ll try to get u to break up with them and try to make them seem like a bad person.
if this person is ur eNdGaMe, ur gf/bf might end up dying in a weird accident and ur going to wake up in hotch’s spare guest bedroom, tied up on the bed. sooo... sorry.
anyway, once hotch has kidnapped u, there is a 50/50 chance u can escape successfully, but in the end, u’ll be back in hotch’s manipulative arms in no time.
jack will be the no.1 manipulation tactic. ex.”jack sees you like a mom,u can’t leave him”
if u do escape, good luck staying low, hotch will find u no matter where u are on the globe.
Derek Morgan:
sadist, quick tempered, manipulative, quick-witted
morgan has literally one of the best social skills on the team.
u are his gf/bf. u have fallen for him. there is literally no way in hell u didn’t
he is the king of smooth (lol thats the dumbest shit ive ever written)
but like once u guys are dating, he’ll start controlling you.
he doesn’t have to manipulate you becuz ur just gonna listen to what he says
if he tells u to stop talking to ur friends, ur going to stop talking to ur friends
if he tells u to not wear that dress, ur not wearing that dress
morgan doesn’t have to kidnap you becuz you’ll willingly move in with him becuz he’ll make u dependent on him and only him
there is no chance you’ll escape becuz u’ve been gaslighted into being his
sorry babie, you’re out of luck.
David Rossi:
listen, out of all the cm cast, i cannot see rossi as a yandere. maybe like a platonic parental figure yandere but like...romantically? ill write for both tho lol
manipulative, phD in gaslighting, toxic, obsessive
Platonic:
he is a helicopter parent on STEROIDS
you wanna go out with ur friends? who are they, what are their names, where do they live? what are their parents names, address, and contact number?
if rossi doesn’t like any of ur friends? holy shit don’t even bother asking to go out, you’ll only get him mad.
toxic parenting TO THE MAX
literally if u don’t listen to what he says, he’ll shame u and degrade you. ex: “you’re so stupid, y/n! didn’t i tell you to put the dishes in the dishwasher AFTER rinsing them? Do you not have a brain in there?”
he’ll try to not physically hurt you, but if push comes to shove *shrug*
if ur 18, honestly fucking RUN. get into a college as far away as you can and get a job vastly different from his. so you’ll never cross paths
rossi will check in tho at least once every day
if anyone’s bothering you? you won’t see them again
ur boss is being a dick? he won’t be at work tomorrow or ever again.
if u decide to go back home, don’t bother getting a ticket back cuz once you go back to rossi, there is no going back.
Romantic:
parent rossi but romantic instead of platonic basically lol
manipulative, toxic, obsessive, abusive
he’s controlling, emotionally and mentally abusive
god, hes awful
he will make u feel like shit for wanting to hang out with someone else or if you want to leave his mansion
he’ll make u feel like he’s the only one for you.
ex:”no one else will love you like i do” or “who will anyone love you? ur a mess you shouldn’t even be outside!”
you can try escaping, since he’s gone and he “trusts” you to stay home, but there is 89.99% chance you’ll be caught.
Penelope Garcia:
sensitive, jealous, emotional, possessive
omggg yall are probably friends at first
so easily jealous abt e v e r y t h i n g
you can mention how you had brunch with a couple friends. “are they better than me? u never have brunch with me? why do u always hang out with them?”
god forbid you try to defend urself, “are you mad at me?” immediate tears.
then ur apologizing instead of her.
if ur dating? she tracks everything, ur phone, bank accs, where u are, what u watch. (incognito is ur best friend)
but even then,she knows everything ur doing,no matter the time of day
you can easily escape Penelope tho
shes not out in the field much, so as long as u stay off the grid, you’ll be safe.
the only person she trusts you with is the BAU team, so if you escape
be warned that they’re going to look for you too.
Jennifer Jareau:
possessive, obsessive, kind, deceptive
she’s a mild one honestly
she treats you well, and asks you out + dates you like a normal person
but sis believes that u are the only one for her
if you try to break up, “YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME. ILL DIE WITHOUT YOU”
of course, thats not true, but you can’t risk it.
jj is probably the safest one to be with, she won’t endanger anyone unless she has no other option.
you won’t need to escape either, you have freedom and everything in a normal relationship.
you just can’t leave. thats all.
Emily Prentiss:
obsessive, protective, strategic, patient
holy shit, emily is the worst. like jj, she’ll let you have your freedom
you can go out, but emily comes with, she chooses what you wear, and where you go.
“youre going to wear that? are you sure? cuz that color makes you look fat. you should wear that one dress i got you.”
“baby, stop wearing make-up, you look like a whore.”
“the beach? ill come too. i can’t trust you to take of yourself.”
you probably met at a club and clicked
if you try to break up, “you want to break up? go ahead, leave. who would want you, other than me? you’re pathetic and stupid. no one would ever date you.”
she’ll break you down till you only depend on her, so don’t bother to escape.
you won’t have the will to try anyway
Tara Lewis:
mild, protective, calculative, gaslighting
honestly, tara is the last person i see as a yandere, but she’ll be a lot like jj
she’ll give you freedom and everything in a normal relationship, except if you don’t listen her.
tara is controlling as hell, so if you disrespect her or don’t listen, she’ll break you down and make you question your own sanity.
she’s incredibly protective and she plans like 20 steps ahead (a lot like spencer)
be a good gf/bf, and tara will be good back
be disobedient, and you’ll regret it
if you plan right, you can escape.
tara has to be out of town and you would have to be in her good graces to be allowed out when shes gone, but if the stars have aligned in your favor... you have a small chance of escaping
if she didn’t get help watching over you from the team.
thanks for reading! hope you liked! I take yandere requests as well as normal character requests! nsfw/sfw are both okay!
#yandere#criminal minds#spencer reid#aaron hotchner#derek morgan#david rossi#penelope garcia#emily prentiss#jennifer jareau#tara lewis#the bau#yandere headcanons#headcanons#trigger warning#bad stuff ngl#abuse#sfw#ignore the typo#my laptop is shitty#donate to my gofindme#lol
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hey um, idk if ur taking suggestions rn, but would u be up to do a short fluffy thing with trans peter (or whoever, really) dealing with period cramps and getting comfort (probs from tony)? (i sent this previously to send-me-your-headcanons, but I wasnt aware they didn't do trans characters and they recommended reaching out to u, among a couple others) :)
I do write trans character lucky for you! Not very often since it’s close to home but I went for it and tonight was one of those nights even I needed some good trans vibes.
I went with an irondad angle but you can read it however you’d like, I’m just not one to write them as a ship normally so I do apologize if that was what you wanted!!
Warnings: None other than some mention of periods and one mention of a uterus.
The rolling pain was bubbling in his groin with a vengeance.
To say it hurt was an understatement. It was a constant bombardment he not only didn’t want but didn’t need. It drove him to bed and his heating pad, the cramping bad enough the average pain killer wasn’t enough to do more than take the worst of it off.
It must have been a few hours into the throws of day two of his period when Tony came to check on him. A concerned parent despite their lack of relation as he practically barreled down the door to see what was keeping Peter cooped up inside. Too tired and achy to deal with a lecture on disappearing without telling anyone, he rolls to face the wall, trying to fall back into his fit full napping.
“Peter,” The notes of concern present and ill timed as a wave of pain crashed into him. Attempting to quell the nauseating sensation, he curled up, pressing on his pelvis in a vain attempt to stop some of it. “Kid, what’s wrong? You don’t look like you’re doing so hot.”
The bed sinks as Tony sits on the edge of his bed, a gentle palm resting between his shoulder blade. It’s quiet between them, Peter not wanting to explain the situation. Tony knew already, but that didn’t make it something he wanted to talk about. Tony sees that the situation isn’t going anywhere and switches gears.
“What can I do to help you?”
That’s just a little bit easier. “Something to help with the cramping. Anything really.” He grits it out, jaw clenching painfully but unable to ease up until things settled again. God, this was the worst.
“Cramping… Oh.” It seemed to click now and Tony was moving. Peter shut his eyes, wanting just to sleep. He nearly jumps when hands come to rub his back in long, flowing movements. He heard some muttering and guessed it must be the man talking to either an AI or an actual human about getting something over to them. Whatever it was, he hoped it was fast.
Tony keeps him tucked in, comfy as possible with his hands now moving to rub over roughly where his kidney’s sat. It was a parental gesture, one that was just ever so enduring even despite his bitch of a uterus trying to tap dance it’s way out of him.
Eventually, a hot water bottle magically appears and replaces the heating pad at his front, the pad now being shifted under him. It was warm and eventually, he asked for the heating pad to go and it vanished like it had never been. A pill meant to counterbalance his metabolism and actually provide some relief was pressed into his palm and he took it, greedily chugging water to wash it down.
Content now to wait it out with not much else to do, he loosens up and does his best to relax. Tony is still there, now rubbing his belly and jokingly patting it, teasing him now and again. Enough to pull the softest of laughs out of him.
Periods may suck ass, but at least this one sucked just a little less.
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damn i knew john lennon was bad but never the full entire extent. Fuck that man ill piss on his grave. I mainly meant that im not a huge fan of penelopes scott music. Not really my thing. Also tell me the island tea 👁👁 what have ur villagers gotten into this time - amii
yeah my fucking enhanced sense of justice kicks in when i see this shitbag he literally deserves no rights
okay so my island tea:
jacques was being a dick. like a whole asshole. i gave him a hermit crab like i give all my villagers and he said “Oh great. now i can scare my bugphobic friends with it haha” like.... jacques... jacky... that’s literally not funny. don’t go around traumatizing people with an animal that i lovingly gave you.... jacques more like john (funnily enough this is not related to john lennon but to a different john who is also an asshole that i would not hesitate to beat the shit out of)
i also visited walker and uh.. he broke the 4th wall on me. like, i wrote it down, not word for word bc i was so shook, but i summarized it:
"hey, i've heard some rumors. folks around here are saying that this all isn't real. like that this is all fake."
and my character actually reacted to that, with like an emotion. "like they are saying that we all just exist to entertain someone. and it would explain so much. have you ever noticed how fruit grows so fast, or how every tree has only 3 types of wood, and how there's always music everywhere. it's nice, but it's so weird. and have you noticed how weird tom nook is? 'sell me some seashells so that i can give you money that you can give back to me to so that you can pay off your loan'. that's.... SO WEIRD."
AND MY CHARACTER REACTED WITH A DISTRESSED EXPRESSION and then he hit me with the "oh dont worry im just joking. i ate 6 packs of chips and i fell asleep with the TV on yesterday. i had some weird dreams"
walker i do not fucking need an existential crisis. i went on the wiki and lazy villagers do in fact break the 4th wall in new horizons. and here i thought i was in some haunted videogame creepypasta 😳
also paula told me smth nice. she told me that she used to work at an arcade and this one time a kid beat her highscore on her fav game. and she got so pissed that she played that game non stop until she had the highscore again. i’d like to think that if this wasn’t a kid friendly game she would’ve totally thrown hands with the poor child and lost her job over it. either way she implied that she lost her job lmao. i love her a lot, she’s a girlboss
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a run-down of / my thoughts on the novel ‘trade secrets’
so! i’ve recently finished this beautifully written novel by @bettsican, and am anxiously anticipating for the second book in the trilogy! (seriously, give it a read. it’s a great lgbtq+ thriller and mystery story, i promise you’ll love it!! you can find trade secrets in many places, including amazon, where it’s only $6)
as i was reading it, i noted down all the thoughts i had. it was fun, interesting, and kept me on the edge of my seat!
oh, and spoiler warning, of course.
Chapter One
okay. this is interesting. why are they in paris? or rather, why are they NOT in paris?
2080. damn.
who is cooper hall and why is he important i want to knowwwwwwww
Chapter Two
HOLY FUCK
CHAPTER ONE WAS A PROLOGUE
OKAY IF I DIDNT NEED TO BEFORE I HAVE TO READ IT NOW
-ahem- anyway
nate literally everything you think of has to relate to smoking, doesnt it?
clyde you absolutely bitch raccoon
im sort of piecing together what’s happening here? either way this is a SUPER interesting concept.
i love the idea of every word being important
nate look at you being a nice guy. testing the CAPS before giving them to ur clients
or maybe it’s just good business
but whatever
okay, so credits are money in this world. but how do people get them? obviously there’s what nate’s doing but what’s the legal way to get them? ill probably find out soon
if it wasnt explicitly said by betty that nate ends up with another guy (i forget his name. cooper?) i would have thought audry was the romantic interest
audry you loving caring hypocrite
i feel like she’s gonna be one of my favourite characters
who is this young man that dares disturb nate’s slumber
cooper? cooper.
Chapter Three
nate get up
u turtle get up and hurry down the stairs
or—okay you can fall into that drywall that works too
ohhhhh so nate is a detective. that’s interesting
i also love this idea of keeping secrets (haha trade secrets)
dude are you sure that your embarrassing entrance wasn’t the ONLY reason you blushed? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIGHT DIFFERENCE HEIG—
nate ur spending an awful lot of time looking at his features you funky little bisexual
oh damn ur smarter than u seem, just watching him take a single breath and you’re already making connections. i guess that’s why he’s a detective
im gonna assume this is cooper, even tho it never explicitly says so
i feel like we aren’t gonna get his name for a while, bc clients and whatnot and not getting attached
Chapter Four
NATE WEARS GLASSES???????
that’s kind of cute
im lowkey gay rn
anyway
NATE CALLED HIM SWEET-FACED AND PRETTY-FACED O K A Y
oh he has curly brown hair
and oh the glasses aren’t real glasses. oh. the use is actually pretty cool!
so from what im gathering civilians are people who don’t live in sanctuaries, and lemnis are people who do?
cooper sweetie why do u need so much money what have u done
nate’s pretty clever
HAH I WAS RIGHT WE AREN’T GONNA GET HIS NAME FOR A WHILE
well that’s that i guess
Chapter Five
he’s so timid awh
hehe he’s on nate’s bed
sorry
goddammit man calm down or else you’re gonna get everyone in a 5-mile radius around you arrested
wait…. zero-credit balance?? didn’t he just have a few hundred thousand credits???
OH THIS IS A FAKE PROFILE HE MADE
so cooper isn’t his real name either
oh
Chapter Six
oh we’re back to 2080
oh they’re back in the apartment??
it was obvious before but at this point it’s confirmed that they’re going to be doing some travelling together or something
Chapter Seven
this is getting really interesting i dont wanna stop reading and type everything that comes to mind
these are gonna be shorter now hehe
“i’d been a petri dish of mixed emotions and wild chemical changes for half the day” I LOVE THAT METAPHOR LMFAO
what happened with nate’s mom
i want to know
my prediction: she wanted him to either change up or completely remove the chip bc she did something horrible? or maybe she just wanted to leave idk im bad at predictions
either way it said she was crazy
o h
that’s why he’s terrified of cutting the chip
poor nate
Chapter Eight
oh this is strangely intimate
very intimate
i feel that, because cooper has such high pain tolerance (or doesn’t show pain), he has some backstory for it
Chapter Nine
lmao nate just went off didnt he
THEIR FLIRTING IS CUTE FHJKJDLSKAJDKLSJAK
also is being lgbtq+ widely accepted as the norm in this setting? bc nate considered cooper to be flirting with him
ughhhh it’s so good so far, from the character interactions to the suspense, especially in this chapter
Chapter Ten
rude cooper is rude, rude nate is even more rude
F E D O R A
“coop”
Chapter Eleven
aw i love jimmy already—
WHAT THE FUCK COOPER
EXCUSE ME
JIMMY
WHAT
HOW COULD YOU
goddammit
what the fuck is cooper hiding
cooper oh my god
you
you’re playing a dangerous game, mate
are you really that heartless
“deceptively innocent eyes” you got that right
this chapter hurted
thanks a lot jess
Chapter Twelve
“like a weeping wound on the canvas of my home” this has got to be one of my favourite similes ever omg
the way nate’s describing cooper makes my heart hurt awh
i feel like butterflies have some sort of symbolism
maybe being ugly on the outside and beautiful on the inside, or vice versa? the vice versa was basically cooper lol
aye we finally get to meet audry!!
PEANUT BUTTER AND TRICYCLE I WANNA HEAR ABOUT THAT
i love audry omg
IT’S NATE’S BIRTHDAY?? HAPPY BIRTHDAY YA SMOKEY CONMAN
“bright eyes” is the cutest nickname ever
Chapter Thirteen
oh we’re back to 2080
wait what they’re trapped together
is this story gonna have a sad ending
please no
Chapter Fourteen
OH IT’S THE LINE ON THE COVER
i like that
nate’s back to where he left cooper
also if it wasn’t obvious before, it’s definitely obvious now that nate and cooper or gonna find each other again. hm. not sure how i feel about that
kind of pissed at cooper but also we need him for the story to progress
O H
COOPER IM ONLY KIND OF PISSED AT YOU NOW
IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE
NATE IVE SAID IT BEFORE BUT YOU’RE PRETTY CLEVER
also who is ‘her’?
COOPER WANTS TO BECOME A?? LEMNIS?? GODDAMMIT MAN
I CAN FEEL THE PRESSURE RISING
nate’s in danger
wow this chapter is
a lot
i need a break
-cue a break-
Chapter Fifteen
i’m back
eisley is a cool last name
oh wait so even people outside of sanctuaries can become a lemniscate
i’m still not 100% sure what a lemniscate is
it’s so ironic elijah’s last name is king, but i assume you did that on purpose. i also like the slight nod to royalty by his first name
OH
COOPER’S BACK
why hello there
Chapter Sixteen
they’re
competing
to become a lemniscate
and one of them dies
do they fight back?? is that why they end up in prison??? so many thoughts are going through my head right now
nate, your fantasy about becoming a lemniscate is surprisingly dark. i’m totally down for it
Chapter Seventeen
oh wait so joshua is cooper’s blackmailer?? Interesting that it’s a lemniscate
i keep forgetting nate is wearing glasses
cooper, my dude, calm the fuck down. you’re gonna get yourself and nate killed
it’s the return of soft™ nate
Chapter Eighteen
oh there’s another one
oh this is very ominous i don’t like
Chapter Nineteen – Twenty-One
okay i was eating while i read so i couldn’t type here but just know that these chapters were really really good
Chapter Twenty-Two
wait fuck what’s happening this is all happening so fast
cooper brought out his gun,,,, it’s aimed at ivonne,,,,,,, they’re walking,,,
OH IT WAS A FAKE KIDNAPPING
nice
i like ivonne a lot
Chapter Twenty-Three
the entire story just changed course
this isn’t just about cooper and nate anymore, it’s about a corrupt government
NATE AND COOPER ARE HOLDING HANDS AS THEY RUN THROUGH THE BARRIER THAT’S SO ROMANTIC
also the line “only the dead are ever truly free” is beautiful
THAT’S WHERE PARIS COMES IN
THEY ALL GO TO FRANCE DON’T THEY
I’m so curious to find out where this story is going
Chapter Twenty-Four
this is doin me a confusion
but tbh these hints/ visions of the future, if you could call them that, are giving just enough information to keep me super interested. props to you
Chapter Twenty-Five
AUDRY STOP TEASING NATE
just joking keep doing it, this might actually get their relationship somewhere
ivonne is definitely my favourite character so far. she reminds a little of melia from xenoblade chronicles, in that they’re both ‘royalty’ that rebel. also they’re badass and smart
oh fuck the brother is here
okay thank god he’s not an asshole
oh god things are happening again
Chapter Twenty-Six
nate stop ogling at cooper when you’re in a life-or-death situation
holy shit the lemniscate are messed up
this crew is pretty great, it sucks that it’s almost the end of the book
WAIT I FORGOT THERE’S A SECOND COMING SOON HECK YEAH
anyway
YES COOPER PULL THROUGH
awwww yiss
Chapter Twenty-Seven
oh
oh
O H
oh my god i ship them so hard
THEY KISSED
THIS IS SO STEAMY
this chapter was art thank you so much for this
Chapter Twenty-Eight
AHAHAH AUDRY
once again, i’d like to state how much i love her
oh the tension just grew twentyfold
this is… great
oh god nate what are you planning, you just got together with cooper and now you want to leave him?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
what’s with all the dancing?
Chapter Thirty
oh god the description
so he’s going around and giving people credits, all the while confessing things that would help the lemniscate track him down. i assume this means he’s going to die, but why?
just what are you planning?
oh we’re back to clyde, the guy who started it all. it feels full circle
Chapter Thirty-One
OH
HE’S MAKING HIS CHIP SHOW THAT HE’S DEAD
that’s much smarter
FUCK
NATE YOU IDIOT—COOPER’S REAL NAME
SHIT NOW KING IS HERE
everything’s going downhill now isn’t it
Chapter Thirty-Two
wait that took an even darker turn
there’s so much happening right now i can’thandlethis
cooper and nate are couple goals
Chapter Thirty-Three
king isn’t as horrible as i thought
still horrible, but not a monster
NEVER MIND YOU’RE A FUCKING MONSTER WHAT IS THIS BS
cooper
actually
shot
nate
Chapter Thirty-Four
OH MY GOD
WHAT
THIS IS HOW YOU END IT
I CAN’T
HOW DARE YOU
NO
NO
NO
NO
i need the next book
like right now
what the hell
Final Thoughts
okay so this book was SO good, and so well written. like damn
aside from that horrible ending how could you do this to me
i’m joking, it was an incredible and emotional ending, i loved it and hated it at the same time
it very rarely felt static, and especially in the first half, there was a good mix of action and backstory/description. it was never boring
the story is just,,, so unique. i seriously haven’t read anything like it, EVER
the world-building?? Is?? so vast?? and insane??
the increasing tension and speed as the story progressed is perfect, i felt my heart beating faster the more i read
anyway that’s all from me
this book was amazing i cannot wait for the next
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get madder :^)
hey yall remember that post where i gave a 1-or-2 sentence comment about each fanart that got featured in the community update? many people promptly took their panties and corkscrewed them directly up their very touchy buttholes, so i thought it'd be fun to do a follow-up :^)
>everyone who just said "lol bad post u suck ur opinion SUX"
it's my opinion lol deal w it
>it’s kinda cute how you think we would care about this / nobody cares
clearly u do bc ur mad fam!!! hahaha rekd got u!!1!
>perhaps… perhaps art is subjective and they wanted to make some community members happy by featuring them?
they couldve picked a little better was my only point
>"It’s people like this who give new artists anxiety for posting stuff online" / everything about how mean i am bc it will make newb artists feel nerbous :'(
hey guess what! it's the internet where literally everyone can see and say whatever they want. that's the risk ya fuckin take when u post online :^) waahhh
>"It’s called a personal art style"
its common knowledge by now but "its muh style" is not an excuse and yeah its subjective but also sometimes aspects of a pic are just bad
>"how does desnik only get a 5/10 lmao. Amazing shading, a super unique and difficult perspective that brings life to the whole piece? Ye nah that’s shit, apparently."
i said the shading (painting) was pretty good, and they lose points bc "bringing it to life" with a weird pose only works if the anatomy and perspective (which i specified) isnt so off that it takes away from the entire piece pretty significantly, which imo it does. also that pose isnt unique i can find u 10 pics of furries in that exact pose on like the front page of furaffinity or wherever. also i didnt say it was shit LOL
>"“this is anime uwu garbage” is not criticism OP"
fuck yeah it is, you ever been to the front page of deviantart? i assumed the implied "stop using super stylized shitty anime pics as a reference bc ur overall "style" is severely and obviously suffering for it" was kinda evident but i guess not
>"why the fuck do people get so butthurt when someone says their art is bad"
dude THANK you i mean i was expecting pretty severe backlash but i was as least expecting more creativity than literally just "bad post op" 20 times. tho i DID see enough to make this post i guess? this blog is fun but like in a painful way
> “not to be rude to the featured artists, good on them” pick a tone and stick with it
sorry man i really just do have a rude-sounding speaking (,,typing) voice and i dont mean any bad feelings towards these artists, my literal only point is that that one pic has some problems and maybe staff had some better pics to spotlight instead (and i don't even mean that for all of them. top, middle, and bottom left were all good choices and so was desnik's tbh. but i figured id ""review"" them too cuz they were there) i usually even pointed out something i liked about it? but i gotta move fast here cmon 100 character limit
>"dude… do you even know what a sketch is? because that’s in no way a sketch"
what do YOU define as a sketch? i guess the snapper one could also be lineart but its in 2 midtones (which people do when theyre "sketching" out values) and they used a messy brush so my mind went to sketch. and the coatl one looks like they did it really fast and slapped some flat colors on it. actually my point was literally that it looks like they did it fast, like a sketch rather than a lineart
>"at least put in some effort in writing a couple of sentences on each drawing on what, why, and how to improve the drawings. Seeing that some of the art is clearly from amateur artists, some words of advice would at least be helpful here."
yeah u right they definitely deserve better. but i was going fast cuz i just have an affinity for short snappy reviews i guess. like i tried to do cliffnotes, just "this part is good but this part is bad" and then a meaningless number score cuz i aint even addressing this to them, i posted it to a drama blog to complain about staff basically
>the nocturne guy who wrote a lot
alright cool. you totally have gotten a lot better. i never meant to discourage you for drawing in the first place. incidentally i said u had potential bc u were obviously a new artist, but like u were OBVIOUSLY a new artist with a loose understanding of depth and shading and stuff, and again this is a front page spotlight yadda yadda. ill fuckin hit u with a review right now:
you clearly understand shading and anatomy way better, and that coatl actually looks pretty fuckin good. the lineart is more consistent, it's framed way better, the proportions are WAY better, and it's really clean and stylized. the shading is infinitely more convincingly shiny and reflective. from here, imo you could benefit from going further with shading (darker, more dynamic, leaving little to no flat spaces like the crest fluff and tongue), and maybe polishing the lineart a little more too, like coloring/highlighting it and really pushing/polishing the linewidth (there are tutorials for that). overall that coatl is v cute, keep on pushing poses & shading
>"i bet OPs art sucks ass"
fIT e ME IrL
anyway thanks 4 reading my fucking essay and i'm super high. if you read al lof this then shame on you
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What We Do In Bram Stoker’s Dracula
alright so i rambled on about this in the Discord buuuut this is a slightly more shiny and cleaner version! :D *enthusiastic single party blower goes off* okay so tbh it’s kiiinnd of gunna be the same thing but just, idk, with a little more information lol. while there’s a few details a bit more ‘set in stone’ plenty is open and i’m seriously flexible with ideas so don’t hesitate throw any suggestions at me~ you can DM me on Discord (it’s Nazcool#8991 if u happen to come across this train wreck and don’t know wtf i’m talking about) if you’re interested and/or have any questions (and if there’s enough of y’all that wanna coordinate maybe we can get a channel up/a group chat or somethin’ & go from there <3)
**if u see that there’s no info for w/e character it just means i literally have no ideas for ‘em so go wild & have fun~**
EDIT 1: I FORGOT THE BRIDES OF DRACULA AAAAHH + other details lol
btw this is a two part ad so bear with me as i try to keep things organized:
Part I.
alright alright alright so like i said think Dracula but with 75% less charm & wit & competence. the characters for the ad will have vibes of satire of something resembling being srs but at the same time they’re just ridiculous & dramatic & just, idk, too much™ at times (maybe even more so than Dracula Dead and Loving It lololol). i’m gunna be playing The Dracula role (he doesn’t have a name yet ssssshhhh but at least i have Luke Evans as his face??? :D :D :| okay cheesy as hell i know i know pls forgive me) but everyone else is open! i’m going with the main few folks for rn but in all honesty if you wanna play another character from Dracula that i don’t have listed pls be my guest?? as for ideas themselves i’m still figuring my guy out so what might be listed for him may change -but i’ll update things so dw about that- & tbh besides a few main details for The Mina Harker character i’m super flexible on everything so just holler at me if ur interested :D
also just ‘cause this might be more silly doesn’t mean there can’t be drama~ & sadness~ & murder~ pls pls gimme all the tragic stuff!!
BTW u can race/gender bend any of the characters in the list tbh lol (i’m doing a gender bend for The Mina Harker + The Jonathan Harker so yeh go for it babes <3 <3 <3)
A L S O, u don’t have to be that well-versed with the book/characters u just need a basic grasp so that the character can be barely influenced by the original one. If u need help with any of this just lemme know i am more than glad to aid u <3
roles:
The Dracula- taken. so hey i’ll be playing The Dracula! I’m still working out how old he is but he’s probably gunna be old old to keep with the #aesthetic of the character (also i wanna have it so that he’s still oblivious to some more 80s day things & he’s that weirdo who dresses in old clothing when not in public). Think between 1800 and 2000 y/o old xD;;; anyway so backstory is still obv. In Progress but really he was probably stupid and got himself turned into a vampire ‘cause he was a gullible fuck & now has to suffer with the consequences -this includes adapting to having pointy sharp teeth, feeding on the living in order to survive, and outliving everyone that u have ever loved :’D he’s totes fine w/ this guys it’s fine. he pretty much struggled for ages & while he likes to exaggerate/romanticize what happened to him it was pretty terrible™ & he has plenty of a fuck up under his belt. over time he got to know other folks + vampires & he adapted but not enough? like he’ll quote you some fancy-ass poem to be elegant~ and he has a pity party every 5 seconds & gets pissy when no one pays attention to him he’s just needlessly #dramatic
somehow, he pissed off a family of vampire hunters who have been going after him ever since??? i haven’t plotted out when this began so it’s open as of rn lololol & it’s The Abraham Van Helsing who is now in charge of hunting him down~ (more info, or rather just ideas, in The Abraham Van Helsing character section)
& now here comes the more complicated section tbh: so i haven’t planned out when this happened yet -i’m torn between sometime just before/after he was turned into a vampire or during WWI big range i know- but he fell in love w/ a man & that man died tragically so he decided to try to be w/ the guy’s kid only for them to die too at some point but not before they had a kid (might be bad luck? might be a curse? who knows *shrug.gif*) so yeah fast forward MANY YEARS & now he’s trying to be with The Mina Harker who is the last(?) possible descendant of his first love. rn they’ve been best friends for 6 yrs w/o The Mina Harker knowing A. that The Dracula is in fact a vampire, B. that he is the descendant of the first man The Dracula loved, & C. that The Dracula is, in fact, in love with him -he just thinks he’s a rad and weird best friend who does weird stuff at weird times of the day. SO YEH that’s his awkward life he’s just trying to be w/ the love of his life piss off other vampires/hunters/supernatural creatures/world pls & ty
he’s also super weird ‘cause he doesn’t wanna turn any of the descendants into vampires??? which makes each death more painful ‘cause he has a code or w/e & it’s becoming more & more tempting w/ each descendant so yaaay for drama~
also! he has a few roommates & there might be a documentary being made about them which is detailed in Part II. of this ad~
The Mina Harker- open. as listed in The Dracula section The Mina Harker is the descendant of the first man The Dracula loved & The Dracula has been pinning for him for the past 6-ish yrs. rn they’re the best of friends & The Mina Harker thinks The Dracula is a totally good guy -he’s a mostly™ good guy *cough*- & super cool but also super odd but he likes him a lot anyway as a best friend lololol. as for the descendants of the first guy honestly that’s pretty open (like The Dracula pretty much loved every guy after that BUT if there was only a female descendant at the time he loved them too even if they weren’t his technical preference ‘cause love > all) but they pretty much died in bad ways??? like it could be mundane bad ways like illness or war or it could be off-the-walls weird like being crushed by an elephant or getting struck by lightning five times idk idk whether it’s just Bad Luck on The Dracula’s part or a curse is open so yeh lmao.
ANYWAY so for personality i was thinking that this descendant is more on the quiet/introverted side??? like he’s super nice to ppl and wants to help but confrontation??? big groups??? talking to ppl a lot??? not his forte he is an awkward bby. while The Dracula & he aren’t exactly the same personality-wise they get along absolutely great which probably is even more tough for The Dracula ‘cause??? he loves him??? & has to protect him from all of the other vampires who probably wanna eat him??? like pls no he wants this guy to live leave him alone *sobs*
there’ll probably be ppl to try to stop The Dracula from pursuing his dreams maybe because they’re dicks but actually probably because The Dracula is a dick & he has a few skeletons in his closet (he dresses them up in costumes for Halloween & nobody's the wiser, except for his roommates ofc) but it’ll just be random and confusing to The Mina Harker ‘cause, yeh, who would hate his bestie???
besides being best friends w/ The Dracula for about 6 yrs, being engaged to The Jonathan Harker (for w/e reason is up to u tho it could be funny that he wanted to fulfill some wish/will that a dying relative had aka them trying to fuck over The Dracula), not knowing that The Dracula is a vampire despite possible signs + ppl maybe hinting/telling him, & woops having no kids of his own & he’s what thirty or forty-something that’s a nail-biter for The Dracula for sure everything about the character’s past is open!
okay so final lame part but i’d absolutely LOVE it if you used Michael Fassbender as the fc ‘cause I <3 him a million times BUT if you really don’t want 2 you don’t have 2 i won’t force u into that decision if you like the idea but wanna use someone else~
The Jonathan Harker- open. an idea i had for this one is that, for whatever reason, she’s engaged to The Mina Harker character & they’re pretty much complete opposites. she’s a nice girl but she just… is too active. a pure extrovert by nature, she’s always going to parties and socializing and dragging The Mina Harker along with her. she loves him with all of her heart it seems though it appears as if she really doesn’t listen to her fiance & enjoys the concept of him rather than who he is actually. The Dracula is pissed off about this and has contemplated her death approximately fifty five times now. probably calls her vapid or w/e while he’s on his pity party couch (yes that’s a thing don’t judge) rofl
The Abraham Van Helsing- open. the idea i have for him is that he is the descendant of the family who have vowed to hunt down The Dracula. kind of awkward because The Dracula just wants to be left the fuck alone (and okay maybe he wants to kill a few peasants in peace but he can’t seem to get what he wants, can he?) but overall the tone is that this guy hates The Dracula. however, times have changed a bit and nowadays he just confronts The Dracula, declares his hatred for the man, and then pretty much just resumes his day. maybe puts garlic in the doorway to a place in order to disrupt The Dracula, switches out regular spoons for silver ones, etc. etc. etc. (honestly, on occasion, he more brings up the fact that The Dracula is in love with a man rather than being a blood-sucking vampire which makes The Dracula go :/. ALSO PLOT POINT if u wanna go this direction but mb actually the reason The Abraham Van Helsing keeps going on about this is because he's trying to push The Dracula away and has feelings for The Mina Harker??? idk idk late-night ideas flooding in here lmao). overall, he just acts like a prick to The Dracula tho The Dracula probably deserves it lololol. it doesn’t help that they live in the same building, which typically causes The Abraham Van Helsing to be locked out on stormy evenings while The Dracula bemoans whatever fate he thinks up at the time on the couch near the entrance.
the fc i have in mind is Jonny Lee Miller ‘cause i really like his appearance in Elementary but tbh if you have anyone else in mind go right ahead!
The Brides of Dracula- (shhhh ignore the fact that i forgot this section initially) so that this is pretty open since there'll probably be at least a few folks The Dracula has turned like the dumbfuck he is lololol. more than likely they have their own lives but they may??? still have contact w/ him??? & while he pretends to not give a fuck about them they're like his kids???? like pester him for money and he'll be all ‘Why??? I just gave you some!!’ but if anyone hates them he'll be all ‘Don't talk to me or my 100 children ever again’ & be defensive. overall he'll still be an asshole to them lololol
i have two vague af ideas just in case u guys are interested:
the first one is that this progeny has an actually good relationship with The Dracula & is always visiting (or mb lives in the same building idk) & is always bringing him presents and nice stuff & mb looks out for The Mina Harker when The Dracula can't (probably helps cover up a lot of crap ‘cause The Dracula is a mess tbh *shrug emoji*).
the second is a progeny obsessed w/ The Dracula & wants to be w/ him forever & doesn't wanna share him w/ any1 else. which a major problem cause??? The Dracula is in love with The Mina Harker??? so mb this progeny wants to sabotage the relationship anyway they can??? & wants The Mina Harker dead???
they can be any ethnicity/gender ‘cause The Dracula doesn't discriminate LOL
Brides:
any #
The Renfield- open.
The Lucy Westenra- open.
The John Seward- open.
The Quincey Morris- open.
The Arthur Holmwood- open.
Part. II
soooo for this part the concept is fairly simple: i wanna have a What We Do In The Shadows sort of plot where my character has a few roommates (preferably 3-5 though the number isn’t in stone yet) and they’re all weird af. not only that but potentially??? they have a documentary being made about them -w/ 80s London aesthetics + technology- due to vampires revealing themselves 2 years prior. it’s still in production which means there’s at least one cameraman around at all times. my character is dreading the time when it’ll be showed on TV because he has been trying to hide the fact that he is a vampire (alright really only to his love interest & best friend he dgaf if anyone else knows). like, think: he enters one of the rooms, minding his own business, & while the camera is technically focused on something else you still see him as he tries to walk backwards as inconspicuous as possible. he can’t deny that he loves the attention, though, so there are points/gunna be points where he’s more featured and may “subtly” try to push aside whichever roommate is around in order to be noticed.
he may or may not threaten the others with death and doom on a daily basis as well over the smallest of things -at this point his roommates know he’s full of shit, tho the crew might not woopsie
ALSO, there's (1) amulet to walk in the sun among all of them (probably his but idk lol) so everyone is always fighting over it rofl he is not happy that he can't be normalish all the time. they probably try to be all fancy but really they're doing rock-paper-scissors or tossing a coin. plans are ruined all the time, ppl are pissed off, good times.
there won’t be any technical ‘inspirations’ for any of the spots from the movie but honestly if ya wanna base your character on one of the wacky vampires go right ahead! everything about the roommates are open & while i prefer them to be vampires due to the aforementioned info but if you have an idea for another species (besides human) lemme know!
**also if u wanna make inspirations for the other characters from the movie besides the roommates 2 be involved w/ them too go right ahead~**
roles:
The Roommates:
(3-5 individuals)
The Crew:
(any # of individuals, at least one-two cameramen)
#justmycharacterthings#really long ad fml#these tags r really only 4 my entertainment#holler @ me babes 4 some drama fun~#& so it begins#Naz leaving crap out accidentally lololol
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ILL COMMUNICATION: “ Compressor Families and their Digital Counterparts” - BY ILL POETIC
It took me a long time to wrap my head around what I should be hearing a compressor do. Even now, I’m still learning, both intellectually and aurally, how to hear compression as well as how to more effectively utilize it. This piece below offers a brief summary into my understanding of analog compressors and their digital counterparts with additional resources available for further learning.
Four years ago I officially made the plunge back into the world of higher education. I’d been majoring in Digital Music Technology, which covered everything from sound-designing synths to recording and mixing in a large-scale studio setting. I’ve been inside a lot of larger studios but never had a full grasp on what all the hardware was really doing. Finally, I’d been given that opportunity.
During a summer break, I came across a podcast that sent me into a small wormhole on compressors. This podcast led me to an additional article (info below) that gave me a deeper insight on how to ultimately view analog compressors as well as how to translate that understanding into digital compressor emulators (plug-ins).
Sine Language Podcast
Before I dive into the specifics of compressors, I’d like to highlight the podcast that brought me here. The Sine Language Podcast dives deep into numerous aspects of audio engineering. From gain staging and EQs to recording wind ensembles, stereo miking and compressors, this is a great podcast to ride around listening to (it’s only available on iTunes as of now).
Compressor Functions
Before receiving a more formal education in audio engineering, I’d always struggled to grasp the true process of compression and how to truly use it effectively. I’d like to give a brief summary as to the basic functions you will see in most compressors, as it will give more meaning to the upcoming analysis of compressor families and their digital counterparts. By no means am I an expert at this. If you’re a novice to compressors as well, this may be to your benefit, as I’m not that much further beyond your scope of knowledge and in many ways may be less so.
I’ve heard compression explained a million different ways, which would always just confuse me more. Not to mention, every compressor seems to look different. It initially feels very overwhelming. And though some compressors may offer different layouts (all of which serve important purposes), understanding basic functions will make these different layouts far less intimidating.
Above is a picture of 5 compressors (all from the Waves Plug-in collection). Each looks radically different but perform the same function: reducing the dynamics of an audio recording. Here’s why: if a vocalist started singing in a whisper and ended scream-singing into the mic, you as the listener would have to turn the music down to save your hearing. Compression boosts that whisper up and squashes that scream-singing down to a much slimmer dynamic range. You as the listener still hear the whisper and the scream-singing and recognize the shift in dynamics but you don’t have to physically turn the volume up and down each time the singer shifts intensity.
So let’s single out one of these compressors and offer a quick definition as to what’s doing that:
Above is an image of the RCompressor from Waves-Plugins and here’s a quick rundown on what’s happening:
Gain - Think of gain as your final volume control. Once you’ve made all your adjustments in ratio, threshold, etc., you will boost or lower your gain to finalize your final level for audio output. Again, I’d think of this primarily as a final volume control, accompanied by a meter that will let you know when you are peaking.
Threshold - Think of threshold as the ceiling for your audio. If a singer is belting out a loud note, lowering that threshold will lower the ceiling on just how loud that note will sound. For example, if you lower a threshold to -5db, you’re telling the compressor that every part of an audio clip that exceeds this level will be squashed down to -5db. Nothing can move past that ceiling. I recommend applying this to an audio file you know well and bringing the threshold as far down as you can to get an exaggerated understanding of what’s happening. Before you do though, you’ll want to understand ratio.
Ratio - Ratio accompanies threshold. Ratio will often be shown as 2:1 or 6:1 or 24:1, etc., though in the example above you can pull the ratio down to any exact number you’d like. Ratio says that for every 2 (or 6 or 24, etc) decibels that you lower the threshold, only 1 decibel will be allowed out. So if you choose a ratio of 6:1 for a vocalist singing a loud run, the compressor will squash 6 decibels of vocal dynamics into 1 decibel. If you were to choose 24:1, you’d be squashing nearly the entire dynamic range of the vocalist into 1 single decibel. I recommend trying this just to get an idea of what’s actually happening.
Attack - Once the compressor detects a sudden rise in audio, you can determine just how quickly it will react (or attack) to that shift in dynamics. For instance, you may want an extremely fast attack if you’re compressing drums since they are primarily sharp transients (the sudden impact of a kick or snare hit). If you set the attack to slow, you’ll miss the initial impact of the kick or snare that you may be trying to compress. Conversely, you may want a slower attack for vocalists and softer instruments to keep a smooth flow of sound.
Release - If the attack focuses on how the compressor starts to compress, the release focuses on how it lets go of what it’s compressing. A longer release means the compressor won’t just stop suddenly once a piece of audio (vocalist, drums, etc) falls back below the threshold, rather it will smoothly release until it’s activated again.
There are plenty of other functions in compressors but I feel these are the 5 base functions to get a true understanding and application of before moving on.
Compressor Families
The Sine Language Podcast has a great 2-part spread on compression. Both are definitely worth listening to, but it was their episode titled “Compressor Design Topologies” that really stuck with me. In this episode, they interview Christopher Dion of Quantum Music Mastering who breaks down his process for grouping compressors into families. Understanding what’s happening inside of each family of compressor really helped me begin choosing which compressors to use for which instruments or vocals and how they were truly functioning behind the knobs. Compressors can be broken down into four families: VCA, Opto, Variable Mu (Veri-Mu) and FET.
VCA
VCA stands for “Voltage Controlled Amplifier” and they are the most common compressors used as they are electrically stable and relatively cheap to replicate. Most plug-ins are based on VCA compressors. Two key features of a VCA compressor include:
Transparency - There is no limit to attack time in a VCA compressor which means you can compress the quickest dynamic shift (such as transients from a kick or snare drum) instantly. This can work fantastic when it’s your sole purpose for compressing, but can feel sterile and lack character for other compression needs, such as long-term
PEAK hard knee - VCA Compressors attend to the PEAK of an audio as opposed to RMS (root mean square). This means they hone in on the highest peak of audio file’s amplitude (say, an abnormally loud snare drum in an audio take) rather than RMS, which takes a more averaged out level of the entire audio clip. Hard knee refers the response curve. Hard knee would be linear, therefore more abrasive in it’s compression vs. soft-knee which has slight curve and softness to the compression.
When to use: For transients notably out of the dynamic range of the rest of the song.
When not to use: Attempt to adjust the overall volume and compression of a song or audio file.
Advantages: Gives a punch and aggressiveness
Disadvantages: Sounds thin and sterile.
Physical Examples: SSL, Neve and API mix bus compressors, Focusrite RED, DBX 160, Alan Smart C1.
Digital (Plug-In) Equivalents:
SSL 4000 Bus Compressor- SSL Duende Native SSL Bus Compressor, Waves SSL 4000 SSL G-Master Buss Compressor, Native Instruments Solid Bus Comp, T-RackS CS Bus Compressor, FXpansion "DCAM Dynamics" BusComp, URS 1980, Sonalksis SV-315, Cytomic The Glue (SSL XLogic G-Series), Stillwell Audio Bombardier
SSL 4000 E/G Channel Compressor: Waves SSL 4000 SSL E/G Channel, SSL Duende Native SSL Channel, T-RackS CS British/White Channel, Eareckon ANALOG87 series, Native Instruments Solid Dynamics, OverTone DSP DYN4000
Neve 2254 - Waves V-Comp, Lindell Audio (Plugin Alliance) Lindell 254E, URS 1970 Classic Console Compressor, Nomad Factory MCL-2269, McDSP CompressorBank
Neve 33609: IK Multimedia T-RackS CS Precision Comp/Limiter, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor
Neve 8014 console (-esque): Sonimus Britson, Slate Digital “Virtual Buss Compressors” FG-8014 (see also Focusrite RED)
Neve VXS Console Comp: Brainworx bx_console
Rupert Neve Design Portico 5043 Compressor: Steinberg Rupert Neve Design Portico Compressor
Rupert Neve Design Portico 5015 Compressor (-esque): Slate Digital “Virtual Buss Compressors” FG-4014
API 2500: Waves API 2500
API 525: LSR audio VLB525, URS CCS Pro 1967
Focusrite Red - Focusrite Red Plug-In Suite, Slate Digital “Virtual Buss Compressors” FG-8014 (see also Neve 8014 console)
DBX160 - Native Instruments VC160, Waves dbx-160, Sknote C165a, Yamaha Vintage Channel Strip "Compressor 260", URS 1975, URS VCA60 (CCS Pro), Slate Digital Virtual Mix Rack, Stillwell Audio Major Tom, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor, McDSP CompressorBank
Opto
In explaining what an Opto compressor does, I’m going to pull a quote directly from the Quantum Music Mastering article that gives a thorough explanation:
“Opto (compressor) uses photocells as a detector and a light bulb to determine the gain reduction. As the signal passes through the light bulb, it will make the light bulb glow more or less depending on the intensity of the signal. Since the intensity of the light is function of the temperature of the filament, the light intensity will vary as a smoother version of the signal. In other words, if the detector in the VCA design sees the exact signal, the opto one will see an averaged over time version of it.This makes the opto compression much less sensitive to transients, peaks and sudden spikes. For this reason, much higher ratios can be used.”
If a VCA focuses on PEAK compression (the loudest moments in an audio clip), Opto focuses on RMS, the overall amplitude of an audio file. The Opto moves slower than a VCA which makes it less ideal for transients (percussion) but more ideal for an overall smooth compression with noticeable character. Because of this, there’s not real need for an attack or release time.
When to use: Opto will even out the overall dynamics of a song. If a song has peaks and valleys, Opto does a good job of leveling them out as much as you’d like. It’s fantastic for tightening a final mix without destroying the integrity and punch of the transients.
When not to use: Again, not to be used with sudden transients, of which it will pass right over.
Advantages: extremely transparent. Tightens up a mix without flattening transients.
Disadvantages: Not built for fast transients. Also, due to to how frequencies of bass vs higher end frequencies work, opto’s traditionally do not work well with low-end frequency content. This causes a pumping effect in low-end frequencies, which can be solved by side-chaining a high pass filter to the compressor (around the 150-250hz range). This side-chain filter can actually be fantastic in a mastering chain.
Physical Examples: LA-3A, JLM Mac Opto Comp, LA-2A, TubeTech CL1B.
Digital (Plug-In) Equivalents:
LA-2A/3A - Waves CLA-2A/3A, IK Multimedia T-RackS CS White 2A, URS Opto2a/3a (CCS Pro), Cakewalk CA-2A, Native Instruments VC2A, Black Rooster Audio VLA-3, Bomb Factory BF2A/3A, U-he Presswerk, PSP Audioware oldTimer, PSP Audioware MixPressor2, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor, McDSP CompressorBank, Antress Modern The Lost Angel
TubeTech CL1B - Softube Tube-Tech CL-1B, URS Tube T (CCS Pro)
Variable Mu (Tube Compressor) (aka Vari Mu)
One of the earliest compressor designs, the Vari Mu is still very popular for high-end audio, specifically in the field of mastering. What makes the Vari Mu special is in it’s relationship between gain and ratio. Vari Mu compressors increase the ratio as the gain reduces. At a technical level this results in a non-linear transfer curve. What this creates for our ears is a smooth compression in which the louder transients are automatically compressed at a higher ratio.
The Vari Mu also does not respond as reflexively as the VCA or FET compressor. Because it’s a tube compressor, it takes more time which means it will never overreact to a transient. This is why it’s often used at the mastering stage, as it really helps glue a mix together. Below is an example of the inner-workings of a Vari Mu compressor, if you want to get deeper into the mechanics of how these compressors and side-chain filters work, I recommend reading this article on compressor topologies:
When to use: When you’ve leveled the dynamics of a song, running the song through this tube compressor will tighten it up and smooth it out. It will glue the elements of the song together.
When not to use: For punch, aggressiveness or solving compression issues within the mix.
Advantages: Warmth, richness, texture and definition that cannot be replicated by plug-ins.
Disadvantages: Not punchy, operating with no side chain filter can be an issue for bass.
Physical Examples: Fairchild 670, Altec 436C, Manley Variable Mu, HLC Varis
Digital (Plug-In) Equivalents:
Fairchild 660/670 - IK Multimedia T-RackS CS Vintage Compressor Model 670, Slate Digital “Virtual Buss Compressors” FG-MU, Waves JJP PuigChild 660/670, Overtone FC70, U-he Presswerk, Nomad Factory LM-662, Nomad Factory FA770, Bomb Factory Fairchild 660/670, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor, McDSP CompressorBank, URS Child (CCS Pro), Antress Modern The Fire Chainer
Manley Variable Mu - Native Instruments Vari Comp, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor
FET (Field Effect Transistor)
A FET Compressor combines the best of the compressors listed above. It provides the smoothness and warmth of Vari Mu and Opto Compressors with the quick attack time and punchiness of the VCA compressor. This is an extremely popular compressor, primarily the 1176 and is noted for its versatility on every type of track: percussion, instruments and vocals.
When to use: for bite, aggressiveness and punchiness on drums, bass, or vocals. Great for warm and rich distortion as well. Also great for use in a mix bus or mastering chain with the compression turned off, just to add color and warmth to the final track.
When not to use: On a master or mix bus with the compressor on
Advantages: adds a punch that cannot be replicated by plug-ins, as with the Vari Mu.
Disadvantages: Most don’t have options for side-chain filtering.
Physical Examples: 1176
Digital (Plug-In) Equivalents:
Urei 1176LN - Softube FET Compressor, Waves CLA-76, Bomb Factory BF76, IK Multimedia T-RackS CS Black 76, Native Instruments VC76, U-he Presswerk, FXpansion "DCAM Dynamics" ChanComp, Slate Digital Virtual Mix Rack, Lindell Audio 7X-500, McDSP 6030 Ultimate Compressor, McDSP CompressorBank, URS Fet (CCS Pro), Yamaha Vintage Channel Strip "Compressor 276", Stillwell Audio The Rocket, Antress Modern The Seventh Sign
Final Notes
A couple final thoughts to include with the information above:
I’d recommend keeping this link of digital plug-in emulators in your bookmarks. Though I pulled some compressors off of here to group them in their proper families, there are a TON of other digital emulators on this link that can help with EQs, reverbs, synthesizers and much more.
None of these compressors are stand-alone. I’m currently getting deeper into applying various compressors to certain tracks in a mix at incremental levels to help shape the specifics of that sound. I have a long way to go still, but the more I understand these compressor families and apply the knowledge, the more I see compressors as just another set of paint brushes to color and shape sound with.
For more information on me, you can visit my portfolio at www.soundrzn.com
Sources: Sine Language Podcast, Christopher Dion of Quantum Music Mastering, Joe Kucera - San Diego City College
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