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#i might recognize i have a problem but will i do anything with it?
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overwatch ratings based on how they would date
did this a while ago but spent too much time on it for it to not be posted. this is just a personal opinion and personal ratings based off lore and bias tbh. this will be updated with every hero (if I remember to lol)
Tanks:
D.VA: 6/10. Caring and loving, fun gaming dates, but gets recognized a lot, and if it came down to it she’d choose her job to protect south korea over her lover
Doomfist: 4/10. He’d be a gentleman but probably only in it for sex or to be a sugar daddy. He’d treat his “lover” with respect tho so not a total loss i guess.
Junker Queen: 7/10. After the shit she’s been thru i think she doesnt really want a partner cuz shes afraid they’re just using her to get to the throne or that she’ll lose them. She’s protective and caring but also a bit overprotective to the point where it’s like okay calm down. Also might get into a few fights but eh.
Orisa: 0/10. she thinks it would be cute to be in a relationship but knows she cant be in one due to being the “protector of numbani”. so no.
Ramattra: 8/10. Deadass depends if it’s an omnic or not. If his lover is an omnic he will cherish them and take care of them, knowing that they’re one of the few things he loves in this life. If it’s a human then theres some. Problems. He doesnt open up easily and while he’s still protective and caring he can sometimes get very distant towards them because he fears that they only got close to him to use him or kill him.
Reinhardt: 9/10: Perfect gentleman. Treats you with respect and love, and cherishes you no matter what. -1 is because he can be really loud sometimes even when he doesnt mean to be
Roadhog: 5/10. I think of him as aroace but he would try and give it a shot just to feel what it’s like. Hes very quiet but also very calm. He would listen to his lover and do his best to help them, but he moves around a lot thanks to junkrat now and might cut off communication with you just to keep you safe when he's on the run
Sigma: 5/10. A real gentleman, would treat his lover with respect and kindness and love. Only downside is when he has one of his mind breaks and breakdowns. He forgets who he is and just focuses on violence. Also his control of gravity in that state is very fucky so if he’s having a breakdown his lover might get throw to the ground. He feels like jackshit afterwards and probably realizes it’s best not to have someone he cares about so close to him
Wrecking Ball: 0/10 no. he would simply not even if he wanted to. Aroace hampter 
Winston: maybe a 1/10. i feel like he doesnt want a romantic relationship with anybody and just wants friends (aroace monke)
Zarya: 6/10. Protective and caring but would focus too much on her job. would also pick her country over her lover if it did come down to it
Mauga: 8/10: Would treat his lover right and give them anything they asked for. Free beach house, gifts, and a loving, protective, obsessive bf. -2 because slight yandere vibes and can get too possesive-
Damage:
Ashe: 6/10. Partners in crime kinda thing but if you’re not really into that stuff she’s probably not that into you. She has BOB watching you when she cant during a fight but shes always next to you when she can be.
Bastion: 0/10. Dude just wants to live in the woods with his bird he doesnt want that stuff.
Cassidy: 8/10. Southern sweetheart. Treats his partner with love and respect. Only downside is that he’d be out a lot doing his job, but he would let somebody else do it to be with you if it’s a special occasion or if he really wants to stay with you.
Echo: 2/10. Not big on romance but would try it out for science. Sadly in the end it’s not real love so. Oof
Genji: 9/10. Probably doesn’t want a relationship at first because of his body but he gets used to it and opens up his heart. Honestly very good boyfriend would be there to listen and help you with stuff. -1 cuz he might be out doing overwatch stuff a lot and also might not be the most exciting person to be around if you're a hyper person.
Hanzo: 6/10. Can’t see him getting in a relationship after everything thats happened but if he did he’d be kinda bad at it but you could tell that he’s trying his best.
Junkrat: 5/10. I love him but i cant really see him *staying* in a relationship for long. He doesn’t know how to stop sometimes and can get really annoying really quick but he loves making things for his lover and would do his best to keep them away from the dangerous bombs. He loves them a lot but doesn’t know how to turn the love down. Really clingy so if youre into that cool.
Mei: 9/10. Absolute sweetheart. Loves you to bits and takes you out to her favorite restaurants and stuff. -1 cuz you had to have a long distance relationship due to her being in Antarctica and the fact she slept for years with no communication with her lover-
Phara: 4/10. Cares about her job more but would be an okay girlfriend, doing the basics.
Reaper: 1/10. He’s done with love and would probably just just be a sugar daddy or just be there for sex. Even if he did find himself feeling something he’d ignore it and move on
Sojourn:5/10. Not interested in dating or finding love but if it finds her she’ll go for it. Pretty nice girlfriend, makes sure to take care of her lover but does focus on her job a lot more sometimes.
Soldier:76: 0/10. Not interested and has made sure to break off any past relationships. Doesn’t want the people he cares about to get hurt. So he still cares but doesnt go see them.
Somba: 7/10. Would be a pretty good girlfriend if she wanted to have a relationship. She keeps all people she cares about far away and unaware of her deeds at Talon. So a long distance relationship until she can take some time off to go see her lover and vibe.
Symmetra: 3/10. Doesn’t know how to even start a relationship and doesn’t really want to. Her job is important to her so she wouldn’t want distractions from it.
Torbjorn: 6/10. His wife and him had a few children and have been married for a while so he’s probably got the whole love thing covered.
Tracer: 9/10. Probably one of the best on this list. She’s loving and caring and makes sure to spend a lot of time with her partner. 
Widowmaker: 3/10. Last partner she had was um. killed by her so. +3 if you could break down her walls and see the real her but very low chance
Venture: 8.5/10: Would talk to you about rocks, fossils, and everything else they can think about. They’d even let you name rocks around the house. -2 cuz they’ll talk your ear off about rocks n stuff while also bouncing around everywhere. They can also be gone for long periods of time but always makes sure to call. If you can deal with the infodumping and adhd then 9.5/10 for you 
Support:
Ana: 5/10. She doesn’t want a relationship but she’d be very loving and caring to her lover.
Baptiste: 8/10. Great boyfriend, lovers needs always come first and he’s very open and always has an ear out to listen. -2 because he’s constantly on the run and the relationship could get stressed.
Brigitte: 5/10. Mostly focused on her work but would make a pretty good girlfriend if she finds the right person. The relationship would mostly be a test one because she lowkey doesn’t understand it.
Kiriko: 4/10. Would love to be in a relationship but protecting her home is more important than finding love to her.
Lucio: 9/10. Actual sweetheart. Would make music for you and would cancel shows last second if something came up and you needed something. If you need anything he’ll be there to help.
Mercy: 8/10. She’s really focused on her work but no matter what would take time to come stay with you for a while. -2 because sometimes too focused on work and sometimes doesnt have time to see you for a long time.
Moira: 0/10. Not looking for a relationship and would probably lie just to get you strapped to a table and butchered.
Zenyatta: 7/10. Would make a decent boyfriend but he can’t have relationships due to being a monk. He’d be there to listen and to give advice when you needed it.
Liveweaver: 9/10. Perfect boyfriend in every way. Like no competition. -1 cuz he's on the run from multiple governments so he won't be able to talk all the time or be with you much to his dismay. multiple texts a day tho
Illari: 4/10. Tbh I can't see her getting into a relationship after everything. She's too scared that something will happen with her powers again and hurt her lover
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sn00pism · 3 days
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"Do you have a heart? Within."
WC! Kunigami Renskue x reader
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He was handsome, that you'd give him.
But oh God was he an asshole.
You really hated his guts, at least you thought you did, maybe annoyance was the word for what he made you feel? You couldn't stand rude or mean people, you really didn't get what his problem was.
However, when you asked Chigiri, the Kunigami that Chigiri described was with him in the Blue Lock program was a completely different person than the one you had interacted with the last few weeks in class. Maybe somehing happened to him? You didn't know exactly what but it must have been terrible for him to do 'a complete 180' as Chigiri described. You really wanted to stop paying attention to him, stop interacting with him, yet you couldn't help glancing his way when he entered your shared class.
Something that drew you to him, maybe you were kind of a masochist? Those BL manhwas were starting to get into your head. Daydreaming about this rude guy, built like a brick, mean to everyone but you, traumatised by something terrible. You could fix him. And as much as you wanted to convince yourself you could, it was anything but realistic.
Kunigami looked down on everyone and mostly stayed out of your way when you came over to study with Niko or Chigiri, yet, you found your eyes never leaving his figure when he exited his room, eyes glued to his toned arms and, dare you say, pretty face. Maybe you were delusional, always bringing stuff to share with them and without realising it, getting him something too even if you knew he wouldn't take it. You couldn't help being kind to him even if he proved to be indifferent to you gestures.
Seriously, what the everloving fuck was wrong with you? You'd be better off liking someone like Yoichi from your mandatory sports class or even Yukimiya from english literature, but you had to get your eyes on the rudest, most insufferable guy on campus.
In an effort to completely put distance between you and Rensuke, you stopped studying over to their dorm, opting for going to a small café near campus and changing your seat over to the far back.
As a few weeks passed by, you kind of forgot about your small infatuation with Rensuke. After all, I seemed it was nothing short of a crush.
In this past weeks, you began speaking with a guy in your class, doing some paper on the hero's journey in fiction books, you grew closer quickly and before you knew it, you had a date.
This of course prompted you to talk about it excitedly with your friends, during a break you had from class. And later on, bragging about it to Ryusei, who complained about not scoring a date with Rin's brother of all people.
And as the day came, you found yourself waking up slightly earlier to get ready, your make-up and outfit casual but sweet, nothing too big or flashy.
Once you got there, no one had arrived at the place you were supposed to meet in.
He's probably late, after all you're thirty minutes early. You'll wait.
After twenty minutes had passed from the time you'd agreed on, you began getting anxious, checking your phone for any messages or calls you might have missed from him but none arrived. Deciding to call him up, immediately noticing he had been online a few minutes ago. The call went unanswered, a simple 'sorry, I think we are not a good match.' following up in the message app you had been checking for the last twenty minutes.
Are you serious?
You began to feel stares on you, couples whispering to each other while looking in your direction. Maybe it was your anxiety, but you couldn't shake the sadness that washed over you like a wave, drowning you in self-doubt and insecurities.
Was something wrong with you? Was it that you came on too strong? Were you boring? Weird?
Sighing and preparing to leave, ego bruised and tears of humiliation begining to appear in your lashline, someone sat right in front of you.
A voice you recognized apeaking up over the chatter of the place.
"Hey"
"Come to laugh at me, Rensuke?"you bit you lip, tears threatening to fall. "Really not in the mood now," you looked down, the first tears sliding down your cheeks "Please just go.." you spoke, your voice was barely above a whisper. You seriously felt like just going home and crying while playing a funny Ryan Gosling movie to cheer you up slightly.
"Now why would I do that?" You stared at him dumbfounded, "I'm here to keep you company while I rest." He flagged down a waiter, ordering a piece of your favourite cake and a glass of water, "Besides, really needed some water, forgot mine."
You scoffed softly, although it sounded more like sigh, "You don't eat sweets, what are you really doing?" You looked up at him, drying your cheeks and looking down at you hands. You didn't want to look at him more than necessary, each time you looked at him, your heart began to beat a like faster, but you didn't want to make assumptions that he was here for you, besides, the pain of being rejected and stood up was still fresh in your chest.
Rensuke looked at you, seemingly bored, but never taking his eyes off you.
"Are you done interrogating me?," he thanked the server gruffly, taking a fork and a small piece of the cake. "I was just on my run and happened to see you." he psuhed the fork near you, motioning for you to take the utensil, "Heard you talking to Shidou the other day, weren't you supposed to be on a date?" you took the fork and took the bite, it made you feel a little better.
You looked back at him, immediately noticing that his hair was slightly damp and there was some sweat sliding down his neck and face. "But this place is far from your dorm, you're telling me you went out of your route to get some water?" your heart raced in your ribcage, hoping he had done that romantic thing the main leads do when they realise they like the protagonist and chase after her, but you didn't want to get you hopes up, look where that got you. That was fiction after all, this was real life and the facts are that you got rejected because of whatever reason and Kunigami probably hated you along with ninety percent of the campus population. Your shoulders sagged in dissapointment as another wave of sadness rushed out of nowhere.
"I did, yeah." He looked away, sighing at you defeated state. Maybe this was his fault, maybe he should've said something sooner to avoid this mess. He took a swig of his water.
You looked at him with a small frown, motioning to his half empty glass, "You're free to go then, won't keep you hostage any longer." Kunigami shook his head, looking out the window next to you, "It's fine, I'll wait for you to finish up."
He turned his head towards you bored, emotionless eyes staring directly into yours. There was something different on his eyes you had never noticed before, did he want to say something?
Kunigami found that he couldn't stop the words from leaving his mouth, the feeling of almost losing you because of this stupid date, the fact that his chest ached when he found you sitting far away from him in class, the way he wouldn't see you in the dorms, studying or watching anime with Niko. Before he knew it, he had to come to accept the fact that he liked you. Every small glimpse he could get of you around campus felt like a breath or air on his strained lungs, he longed to find you waiting for his football practice to finish, looking towards the bleachers hoping to see your figure waving at him, but he never got the courage to even accept these feelings. He wanted to erase them, go back to the machine they had designed him to be, cold-hearted, mean. A wall had erupted between everyone and his feelings, yet you broke through it like it was made of glass, and all it took was a smile. Whenever you went to study, you'd buy them snacks, you got him something everytime, even if he never showed any affection to you. Before he knew it, you had him completely hooked. The old Kunigami resurfacing, soft, firm but gentle.
"I came here, because I was worried.. I just.." He ran his fingers through his disheveled hair. "You probably hate me, and won't want to hear what I have to say... but please just hear me out, you can tell me to piss off if you want after I finish." You sat looking at him stunned, you had never seen Kunigami act so different, he seemed almost desperate to say whatever he wanted to tell you. You nodded at him to keep going. This was weird.
His eyes softened "I like you." He dropped his head into his hands, the weight of his words and feelings sinking into his heart, thoughts of you leaving him there, rejecting him, distancing yourself from him even more had his chest thightening. He found it hard to breathe. The glass wall broke, his feelings flooded him like a wave, had you created a gap between you and him because you hated him in the first place? Had he said something wrong? Mean? Had he pushed you away the way he pushed his friends away? The thought made hot tears line in his eyes, breath shaky. He swallowed, trying to calm his racing mind and heavy heart, "I'm sorry, I never wanted to be mean or rude to you, I like you so much."
You blinked, you had never seen Kunigami cry. You reached over to grasp his hands buried in his face, gently peeling them away from his cheeks, warm and wet with tears, your heart raced and a small smile made its way into your face. Kunigami looked up at you, misty eyes looking into your softened eyes, waiting for the blow that would make his heart break again.
"I like you too." The words stunned Kunigami and he shook his head, heart stuttering in his chest against his will. "No you don't, I know you don't..." his eyes watered again, looking down to you joined hands as you reached one to cup his face, "Yes, I do" Kunigami looked up at you, seeing the smile in your face, warm, sincere.
"Then why-?" you didn't let him finish his question, shaking your head and looking down. "I was being stupid, should've told you how I felt since the start instead of playing around." You smiled at him, gripping his hand again, "How about we go and watch a movie? I think that'll be a good first date, don't you think?"
Kunigami stared at you for a second before his lips broke out into a slight smile, eyes full of warmth, heart sighing in relief and happiness. How long has it been since he felt this at ease? Always looking to be better, pushing his limits, withdrawing from connecting with others to avoid getting too close, letting them get too close.
"Yeah, I'd like that."
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it's been a hot minute since I wrote anything in english, let alone fiction. I'm sorry if the pacing is kind of weird, I'm kind of used to slow burn and I kinda rushed this one, I'm sorry!
Thanks to @pinksodacan for being my beta reader and editor! Eternally grateful bub.
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rin-and-jade · 2 days
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Welcome to the World! : A Starting Guide for Alters
This guide's purpose is to help either new formed/split, or those recently risen from dormancy, or the unregistered/unrecognized alters to get one step closer to functioning at the outside world!
It'll be one long rundown, click below to start right away, see you on the flip side.
From here on, what will be mentioned are things to assess some potential problems, questions, and self-discovery prompts. It is recommended to follow the flow of the guide, but if you necessarily need to skim to a certain section, this table of contents will help you:
table of contents
The beginning - Introduction
Things to look out for - potential problems to assess - Mobility - Gender & Species unalignment - World confusion
Starters - self discovery questions
How a system works - lite educative version
Closing - last notes + extra materials
The beginning
Nice to see you here, in the flip side! Now i know you have lots of questions on hand right now, and why you might be reading this as first thing's first; it's because i am here to help prepare yourself in many different aspects that cannot be learnt/figured out in such a short amount of time unless it is assisted with an experienced person.
If you haven't know what's going on up to this point, along with the kind of situation you're in, first off, you're a system.
Yes, thats right, system is a word for a collection of many parts within one body and you are also a part of it. This can mean you'll hear other kinds of accent inside head, and feeling + liking fully different things, as well as possessing different levels of certain skills and memory. More or less, this belongs to the qualities of a Complex Dissociative Disorder,, where there are types like DID, OSDD, Polyfragmented, etc.
This happens because of how dissociation can wall up barriers between other facets of yourself that stops some level of communication or complete it's integration when bad things happen in early years, leaving them mainly separated and self-autonomous; they're known as 'alters' but i personally love calling them as 'parts' or some might go with words like 'headmates' or 'facets' or even 'members'.
This isn't enough to explain the disorder itself, but i hope it suffices in explaining your situation! Feel free to check some extra system details if your gang has one, let's get to the next section.
Things to look out for
Just a quick warning and a reminder, if you are rather new or have not been actively out,, there is a high chance of having issues with limb coordination, control, and balancing. Other than that, the off-putting sensations you feel such as wrong type of species, height, gender, or even the world being foreign from how you perceive it can make things scary and overwhelming.
Fear not, as i also have the solutions for all these:
Handling poor mobility: First off, take a good moment to recognize your length of the arms, legs, learn the shape of your palm and fingers, and to every corners of your body. Start holding some simple objects like mugs or pens, remember how it feels to grab something with your fingers and gauge your grip strength, experimenting when you squeeze or loosen it. Then start interacting with the objects with both your hands, attempt to twirl it, or hold it in different positions and turns. You can also go for a test walk and sway all your joints to get a better picture of your movement range, practice makes perfect in easing your balance and momentum, it is normal to stub or be wobbly or clumsy at first, so take it easy okay?
To manage unalignment: It is hard to feel comfy if it is not the right height, especially for non-human aligned parts, so using props or any equipment or accessories can give you some sense of comfort (you can even walk on toes if you do need to feel a bit more tall, but don't over do this). Since fully eradicating this is impossible, doing anything in your power to lessen the discomfort is the best thing you can do,, there are also phantom limbs which basically means the extra body parts you identify with does not exist. This can be remedied by applying some gentle pressure to think that it is attached to your main body or use your imagination to satisfy that missing limb. for those not being aligned with the gender, if the body is feminine but you are masculine; try investing or search for a binder. If a binder is out of reach, wearing oversized, or baggy clothes, or hoodies will do the trick. And a boyish clothing style and short hair style if possible too. If its masculine in a feminine instead, using more girly oriented clothing style and do your nails, or any activities that affirms feminine aligned gender. I am very sure there are silicon chest pads but not in terms of where it is being sold at, so try to find them if it's available in your area. When neither and is androgynous instead, try searching for gender neutral clothes that are also neutral colored like grey/black/brown. There are many inspirations of this type of fashion so use the internet to gain inspirations on making your own androgyny look, you could even use make up to contour your shape of face. Now, for the ones who walk in hind-legs, get some platform heels/shoes/sandals/boots. You can find a flat one or the slanted one to match your needs. The idea is the slanted part of the shoe and the thick base gives an impression of canine/feline foot balance and for those who have hooves, respectively. (honestly, paw printed socks will do too, i hope) Lastly, to manage claws, or fangs, try using fake nail art of your color, or attach a fake vampire teeth guard, respectively. For symbolic means, you can even consume foods that are juicy and red, like meat cooked in medium,, or if you want the more vegan option: watermelons, or gummy that represents meat or grubs or just by being red to represent blood.
Getting used to the world Start learning how technology works--phone, laptop, kitchen tools, vehicle if any, and anything else that are often used. Make sure you practice enough to easily operate them, and learn how to use the internet and helpful plural apps or websites such as Lighthouse or start using Simply Plural. Try many foods to enhance culinary awareness, identify lots of other objects and the geography of your area to navigate and understand better. Touch many kinds of materials to train your sensory processes. You could also invest in watching shows and try a variety amount of activities to deepen your understanding of life. Explore different kinds of subject that you are particularly interested on, and lastly, never be afraid to do and try new things! This will guarantee you to seamlessly function with anything the world has to offer.
For starters - Self Discovery
Do you have a name?
do you what's your age?
What's your gender?
What are your pronouns?
Do you remember anything, and how much?
Do you seem to retain some past knowledge?
Can you describe what you look like? (Includes species)
Do you find the outside world familiar or foreign?
Can you state your bio name, family, or any important info?
Is it possible to describe yourself identity/vibe wise? (crucial part to tell apart fragments from splits and from holders that do not embody a personality)
What role could you fit as? (a host, protector, etc. Search for alter roles)
Do you like the outside world? Will you have a chance of being out more often? (to gauge how often one will front)
Have any likes and dislikes or preferences/hobbies?
For the bullet points you couldn't answer, take this as a sign to start searching! It will take some time, but you can ask help from anyone and even me when needed.
How a system works
A system works in communication (be it internal or external) and switches that also often have a specific trigger to call out someone else. Sometimes, though not a must, will have an innerworld that facilitates as a place for everyone to meet and interact.
These things are crucial for cooperation, because you'll definitely need that in order to navigate the world and adapt accordingly.
Communication
There are many kinds of communication styles, sometimes a mix of some or have all of the above,, whatever style you have, make sure to use it to the maximum. There are: via images, via abstract vibes, via emotions, or via direct (verbal) internal thoughts. Some do not have any internal communication, so external ones would be things such as keeping notes or write in a diary or any app for text editing.
Keep in mind that the clarity of communication fluctuates due to various factors, stress as one of them. So it is important to know that it will not work in a constant 100% at all times, use this awareness to strategize if, somehow, you have lost contact with the others.
Trigger & Switches
It is something that elicits a feeling that belongs to a part, which in return, can 'wake' or call one to co-con or front. There are negative and positive charged triggers, and i suggest you to explore what are your potential triggers.
The relationship with trigger and switches is, depending on how strong it is, can cause a switch to happen, where you will be swapped out by another one who got 'called' upon. This mechanism is for adapting to different kinds of situations, and these certain triggers are the key to ensuring the right part handle it's respective job as needed.
Switches can be very subtle, or slow, or obvious, or in a snap. This fully depends on how your system is made to handle problems on hand or when in stress, as sometimes it can cause rapid-switching, or the opposite, being stuck or locked in front. Sometimes, they also cause physical symptoms.
System terms - Basics
Fronting - the alter who has full control of the body, and performing tasks. Co-front - the alter, who have awareness between the outside and inside world, as well as able to control the body though not as complete as the fronter. Co-conscious - the alter who have awareness of the outside world, and spectates, and does not have any direct control of the body. Passive influence - when an alter's specific traits or likes/dislikes leaked to others and/or at front, that changes the initial reaction to be more blended with the other one. E.g. A like fries, B is there and likes spicy sauces. So now, A is craving to eat the fries with something spicy, even if A has no interest when it comes to spiciness or sauce.
For closing
Practice makes perfect, this is everything you need to know to hone your knowledge before finally stepping outside with complete freedom, where you can start anywhere you'd like, and to resume your collective's path to functionality and well-being. It's okay if things didn't go well at first try, and remember to reach out to people who you could trust as it'll help you progress faster!
I am aware that this guide still have a lot of room for improvement, so any requests or feedback will be added here for future viewers! This guide will be subjected to constant updates with even more sections being discussed on, or added touch of details. I will also add on my own posts here to serve as additional knowledge that is related to this topic:
Types of amnesia
Are you a Shard, Fragment, or Alter
Types of subsystems
Front-stuck, and how to deal with it
Physical switches
Comorbidity
Being blurry
Starters to system foundations
How comorbidity affects plurals (ADHD & Autism)
Dealing with the sense of faking
The person who needs to give their back a break, - j
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mxtxfanatic · 13 hours
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sorry if you're done talking about it and don't want to discuss it anymore, but for me the 'trolley problem' post was just a sad note about how xie lian's attempts to stop "the trolley" (who always has a name and we very well know about it) end up in a disaster. not because xie lian did it, but because the trolley is actually an unstoppable force with malicious intent and no one else gives a fuck or doesn't have resources to help
but xie lian also shows us that even if things end up like that, it's worth trying. it's worth it, because you might not save everyone, but might save a child. a village. a little boy. a little girl. but if you don't do anything, you'll never know
I’m gonna go ahead and link this addition to my original commentary plus this response that I had in the notes to someone else with a similar reading of that post:
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All I can say is that some of y’all are nicer readers than I, because I took that post to mean exactly what op said. If op came back and clarified something, I didn’t see it; I’m only talking about the original post and how inappropriate it is to 1) victim-blame a victim of the events in question for apparently having the audacity to not passively accept events he could influence for the better and 2) say this as a “joke” (because the blasé tone, minimalization of the actual events, overexaggeration of the victim’s responsibility for how said events turned out, and the flat-out avoidance to name what was the actual cause of everything that happens to make it into a meme format was fully meant to be taken as a “joke”).
The issue both with the trolley problem and the likening of it to the events of tgcf is that neither the trolley nor anything Xie Lian experienced are “unstoppable forces.” The trolley is not a natural disaster or the act of an omnipotent god: it is just a trolley. And not only is it just a trolley, it is a trolley that was made, owned, driven, and maintained by people. Everything that goes into a scenario where a trolley is on track to run over a crowd of people (tied to the tracks, another thing that is decidedly not a natural occurrence), is one that is 100% manufactured by multiple different people.
Likewise, while the Yong’an drought was a natural disaster, everything that led to the fall of Xianle was 100% the machinations of multiple different parties, from the rich nobility of both Xianle and Yong’an hoarding their wealth, the corrupt officials who stole aid, the corrupt religious officials who blocked Xie Lian’s followers from praying to him, Guoshi and the king for keeping all of this from Xie Lian, and to the other heavenly officials who withheld help with the intent to prey on the victims of the disaster. Jun Wu’s contribution could honestly be considered the least in this conversation, merely serving as the wind fanning the flames of a fire that had already started. None of that was a coincidence nor the fault of anything Xie Lian did or attempted to do.
Yes a big part of tgcf is recognizing that Xie Lian’s steadfastness to helping should be a personal goal, but another big message that mxtx pushes in all her works is that 99% of all societal problems can be tracked down to a few select individuals choosing to do evil because they don’t think that their greed, selfishness, insecurities, fears, or entitlements are a bad thing while most everyone else either looks the other way because “it’s not my problem,” tries to benefit because “why let opportunity go to waste?” or actively participate because mob mentality. Mocking good people for doing good under these circumstances will never be funny, sympathetic, or relatable to me.
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tortellinigirl · 2 years
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I feel like recently, ADHD has kind of become shorthand for “a person who is annoying online and has no real problems,” and I don’t really think that’s awesome news, given the context that ADHD has a long history of being disregarded as a made up disorder that’s just an excuse for poor/obnoxious behavior, no matter how much scientific research proves otherwise. ADHD is not by any means the only disorder that has people making a thousand misleading tiktoks about it, so perhaps do some critical thinking about why specifically ADHD has become the poster child for that behavior. There are certainly valid criticisms to be made of the way we discuss mental health online, but maybe use your brain and determine why this disorder in particular is the one that’s easiest to point at for being “annoying” and “not that big of a deal.”
#idk maybe if u actually watched a couple of the tiktoks u might learn that the lack of focus thing is reall not the main issue#its just what the people around us are most likely to notice and be bothered by#not saying it doesnt get obnoxious seeing people say the same thing over and over#and yes some people are like purposely vague and disingenuous about the symptoms to get views from people thinking they have it now#but i see that with everything. like autism PTSD depression OCD anxiety#im always getting tiktoks saying that im a lesbian or i have repressed memories or “x normal thing is a symptom of y disorder!!”#and yes its annoying but its probably somewhat helpful to people who actually are dealing w those things#and also like. if u simply stop treating ur for you page like a crystal ball that sees into your soul and reflects it back#and realize its just an algorithm designed to make u interact whether thats bc u like what u saw or fucking hated it#then u will not be as bothered !#but yes our generation seems to have a habit of constantly trying to find the right box to out ourselves in so we can be like. “marketable”#like people seem to want to design their personality like an movie character or something#but its so shitty that we’re dog piling all that on ADHD as if our specific disorder has anything to do with it#also personally i think its kind of normal to be really focused on a particular aspect of your identity when u just discovered it#and it usually evens out and just becomes part of the background of your identity#but yes there’s often a problem with pathologizing normal things#but i think its important to recognize that lots of things that are normal occasionally are pathological in excess. like thats how it works#like we’ve all been through how being sad sometimes is not the same as depression#why cant we grasp that occasionally going into a room and forgetting why you’re there isnt the same as ADHD#my posts
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cant do it anymore sorry, unfollowed literally everyone except for a very VERY small handful of blogs, mostly ppl i know irl or im very close to like on priv or something. i will still post but it's Just Me jfhdk there's probably not gonna be any new art reblogs or anything... just reminiscing on old stuff, i cant deal with the new stuff anymore
i did keep all the smplive blogs in my following tho on the off chance someone decides to come crawling back lmao
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caffeinatedopossum · 1 year
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My anxiety is awful, I genuinely don't know how I live like this
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llycaons · 1 year
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not to be a downer and say things like 'jc is doomed to be miserable forever' but imo his most significant trait IS his lack of personal growth. his complete inability to let anything go and his fixation on blaming people for what happened and his insecurity and fear of looking foolish or taking risks or being vulnerable and all strong emotions expressed as anger is really not doing anything for him or for his relationships and at least in the novel it's stated explicitly that he's never going to be able to change so...yeah I think he is doomed to be miserable forever :/
#in the drama I have hope for him still#in the novel hes quite hateful so its fine if he's unhappy#like yeah hes been through a lot and that wasnt his fault#but still blaming lwj and wwx for his parents dying over 20 years later??!!#not to be like 'he needs forgiveness to heal' but he literally cannot seriously still blame them#and recover from his losses#like it is very tragic but he needs to do some work here as well#and I hope the gc is a turning point#after wn told him the truth and like forced him to recognize that other people were hurting too#and hurting for his sake#like hes unable to take responsibility for anything its infuriating#this is not me being a hater btw I dont hae him I realluly want his drama self to heal and find peace#I dont think he and wwx can have a relationship at all until he stops relying on wwx to solve his emotional problems#hes so. hmm. yeah hes very reliant on others to care for him#which isnt even a bad thing on its own but its not rly reciprocal and he never seems to recognize that wwx#also might need that sometimes. well he does a few times in post ss. good for you jc#but I do think for drama jc their closeness in the past and the temple scene will rly#help them move on past it#for novel jc they honesty werent that close so jc rly will be miserable and angry forever. lmao#anyway this is your regular jc programming from someone who literally cant stop thinking about him ✌️#tl;dr: please take some responsibility for your actions and have some humility and learn to be ok making mistakes you'll be happier for it#cql txp
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peachesofteal · 5 months
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Light On - single mom/neighbors fic Simon Riley/female reader - reader POV
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You have a problem.
You miss your neighbor.
He's been gone for two and a half weeks, and every day you catch yourself holding your breath, listening for him next door. Watching for the light on his balcony, checking your phone relentlessly.
You've been worrying, anxiety turning into a gnawing ache beneath your ribs, wondering about how he is, what he's doing, if he's okay. If he's safe.
He'll text you. Right? When he's home? He said he would, didn't he? You're not sure. Not sure of anything when it comes to him, confusing thoughts and feelings turning over and over in your head every second, twisted up and tangled in your heart.
You've friend zoned yourself, you know it. Relying on him too much, asking him for help all the time, inviting him for dinners but too afraid to try to take the next step. And didn't you do it to yourself anyway? Didn't you ask him to babysit for you, so you could go out on a date with some asshole that didn't even show? He's your friend. He's your neighbor.
Yeah but he asked you to go for dinner, the night you were sick. And he rushed to you and Emma when that creep was following you in the park. Doesn't that mean something?
He asked you AND Emmaline to dinner, not like on a romantic date. And he did the same thing anyone would do, if they thought their friend was in trouble, didn't he?
He doesn't act like your neighbor. He acts more like... a husband, than anything else.
Not knowing is confusing, and on top of your grief, it makes you feel a little more vulnerable than you care to admit, but you can't deny your own truth. You like him. Even Emmaline likes him, little face smiling up at him every chance she gets, staring at him like he's the whole world. Maybe he is. You can't help but swoon over the way she interacts with him, how she settles so easily with him, how she coos and babbles at him like she's having a whole conversation with him. When he walks into a room, she lights up like the sun, happy baby giggles and everything, the sweet sounds of her glee at her favorite person's face like music to your ears. So unfair. You suffered for sixteen hours trying to give birth to her, alone... and he comes around for a few months and all the sudden you've been replaced.
You can't blame her too much, you guess. You get it. He's... something else. Something you're not sure you understand. Something you don't know you're ready for.
Still, you think he might feel the same way.
You shake your head. Stop. You're getting so far ahead of yourself.
Which is why you've convinced yourself that when he's home, the next time you see him, you're just going to buck up and do it. You're going to tell him how you feel. No matter how hard it is.
You've even practiced what you'll say. Staring at yourself in the mirror nervously, reciting different ways to say 'hey Simon I really like you and was wondering if you want to go out on a date even though I have a baby and am basically a widow.'
Emmaline cries, announcing that she's awake, and you're so quick to soothe her, holding her to your chest, whispering a good morning to her, rubbing her back and tummy as you always do. You think some people might say you're spoiling her, that you're not letting her cry long enough, that you're teaching her bad habits or manners but you can't help it. Her father died before she was even born. You're the only thing she has in this world, the only person that gives her love, that makes her feel safe-
or at least, you used to be.
You hear your neighbor in his flat hours and hours later. Well past sunset, Emmaline already sleeping in her crib, your dishes already done, little chores taken care of, and you're sitting on the couch with a glass of wine, watching a movie at a low hum.
Was that- is he?
You sit straight up, straining to listen. It takes a second, but eventually, you recognize the tell tale sound of an interior door closing, and then the balcony glows with the light from the inside.
He's home. You take a large gulp of wine, and a deep breath. Just go over there, and tell him how you feel.
Your fingers curl into a fist, hesitantly knocking at his door, holding your breath. When there's no response, you try again, a little louder, and then feel immense relief when the lock clicks.
Until it opens.
Simon doesn't look like himself. He looks lost. Haunted. There's remnant of black grease around his eyes and instead of being maskless or wearing the usual cloth one, his head is mostly covered by a balaclava bearing a skull, and his eyes are blank. Dark. Something is off.
"Hi." You squeak, and cringe inwardly, stomach flipping like you're on a carnival ride. You raise the two bottles of beer that you brought over with a meek smile, gesturing to them and the monitor. "Thought we could um... try this again?"
"No." His refusal is flat, rough, and you blink in surprise. No?
"Oh- I uh... just thought-"
"It's not a good time." He cuts you off, and then before you can even get another word out, the front door closes in your face, leaving you outside in the hall, bewildered. Hurt.
Guess he doesn't like you after all.
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amomentsescape · 4 months
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Hey I love yanderes and slashers and used to have a sleep walking problem where I would try to crawl through windows, can you do a yandere slasher x reader where the reader has developed Stockholm syndrome and been loving to the slasher so they trust them and let them have more freedom. Then they see them try to crawl out a window in their sleep? How would they react? Would they believe the reader? What would make them believe them if they didn't? If they didn't believe them the how would they react to finding out the reader told the truth?
Thank you so much! And merry Christmas! 🎄 🎄🎄🎄🎄🎅🎅🎅🎅🎅
Slashers with Reader Who Sleepwalks & Tries to Leave
Yandere! Slashers x Reader (Separate)
Warnings: Yandere behavior, of course. Mentions of abusive behavior
A/N: Merry (late) Christmas! I hope you all had a great holiday! For this request, I decided to leave Eric out. He's just the complete opposite to a Yandere in my opinion, and it was nearly impossible for me to write him as such. I hope that's okay!
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Freddy Krueger
He knows you would never purposefully leave him
Like, he actually knows
His (undead) life revolves around sleep
He knows when you're awake and where you're actually sleeping, even if he keeps you stuck in his dream world
So when he finds you trying to escape out of the little window he built for you, he just laughs
He had already known you sleep walked
He'd been haunting your dreams for weeks prior to actually taking you
Freddy just keeps watching you, not really doing anything about it
You're stuck in his world either way
Might as well see how far you'll go
He'll almost use this as a test of sorts
He'll let you wander to wherever you want to go in your sleep, and he may even change the environment to something you don't recognize
When you wake up, his name better be the first thing that falls from your lips
If it's not...
Well, he'll just have to try harder at getting you to need him
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Michael Myers
It took a very long time for Michael to get to this point
The fact that he lets you sleep without chains is a huge decision on his part
He doesn't trust easily
And any feelings of trust he did have come crumbling down the moment he wakes up without you beside him
It didn't take long to find you
There you were, pushing and prodding at the boarded up window
He's truly pissed
And a little hurt
He really thought you were growing to actually like your situation
But when he spins you around and sees your eyes staring blankly through him, he tilts his head
You don't seem... right?
He'll shake you harshly until he sees the life come back to your eyes
When you finally look up at him with a similarly confused look on your face, he starts to realize
He understands you well enough to know when you're not acting like yourself
When he finally explains what you were doing after you repeatedly asked him, you sigh
You explain that sometimes at night, you wander around without realizing it
A sleepwalker, huh?
Sadly, the chains will need to come out again
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Jason Voorhees
You wouldn't actually leave him, right?
You seemed so caring
He actually believed you when you said you needed him
But here you were, trying to leave your shared home in the middle of the night
He almost breaks down as he picks you up and takes you back to your room
He finds it a bit odd that you don't fight back at all, but he assumes you just don't care to
He locks you up and makes sure that you can't go anywhere
How could you do this to him?
When you wake up the next morning in chains and not in your shared bed, you begin to cry for Jason
He tries to ignore you, but he can't bring himself to hear your sad voice calling out to him
You try your best to tell him that you don't remember what happened, and that you would never leave him
And maybe he's too trusting, but he believes you
You just seem so sad and so genuine that it's impossible for him to think it's anything other than honesty
You couldn't be that stupid anyways
You'd get lost in those woods alone at night, he knows that
So he just has to believe you
He loves you, and love means trust, right?
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Thomas Hewitt
But you were being so sweet to him just hours before
How could you lie to his face like that?
He wakes up without you in his arms, and he just about loses it
Frantically searches for you around the house and finally finds you at one of the nailed in windows
He pulls you away quickly, staring at you sadly
He's waiting for an explanation, but you don't say anything
You just stare
You weren't acting like yourself
He pushes you back towards the bedroom and you walk the rest of the way yourself, climbing back into bed with ease
He's confused, but decides to see if it will happen again
You can't leave anyways
The whole house is locked up, and you don't even know where the keys are
You act just like your normal self the next day
And that night, you're back to walking around with a blank stare
He figures this just might be a thing you do
Doesn't really try to stop you, but he does follow you most nights to make sure you don't accidentally hurt yourself
On nights he wants you in bed, he ties some old fabric around your ankle and holds you tight while you sleep
You might not ever know about your late night adventures unless he decides to tell you
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Bubba Sawyer
He's quite literally blubbering to you
He's crying, he's frantic, he even shakes you a bit, and you just stand there not responding
He keeps waiting, and when you start to just wander around again, he loses it
What's wrong with you? Why are you acting like this?
He ties you back into bed and stays up the rest of the night, watching you
The next morning, he confronts you stressfully
You keep telling him over and over that you don't know what he's talking about
But he refuses to believe you
(He wants to believe you, he's just scared)
He only finally realizes you were being honest when in the middle of the day during your nap, he finds you wandering back to the window with his whole family watching you
You weren't stupid
Why would you try to leave when literally everyone could see you in broad daylight?
His family begins laughing and saying things like "looks like you got yourself a sleepwalker"
So you weren't purposefully trying to leave him?
He cries tears of joy and spends the next couple of days pampering you and giving you just about everything you want
He does his best to show you that he's sorry
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Brahms Heelshire
It's quite literally known that Brahms has abandonment issues at this point
So when he catches you climbing up onto the window sill
He loses it
Will grab you and roughly pull you off, your body falling to the ground
This immediately wakes you up, your eyes searching around frantically
When you see Brahms standing above you, you try to reach for him, but he only shoves you away
You look so sad and confused at this, but Brahms is too stubborn to give in
He starts tying you up again each night, still very hurt that you would try to leave like that
It takes weeks for you to gain his trust again
And the one night he lets you sleep freely, he catches you by the window again
But instead of grabbing you immediately, he decides to just watch
He wants to see how far you'll go so he knows just how severe your punishment will need to be
But instead, you just give up on unlocking the window (it was jammed), and you just turn around and walk straight back to bed, not even registering Brahms being right there
This is odd
You need to explain the concept of sleepwalking to him the next day
He still remains skeptical for a while, but he'll come around
You just need to be extra attentive for a while...
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Norman Bates
Norman already knows a lot about sleepwalking
(It's what he thought was going on for a while when he couldn't remember large chunks of time throughout the week)
When he finds you opening a window in the middle of the night, he bolts at you, ready to lock you back up in one of the motel rooms again
However, when you don't respond or reveal any emotion on your face, he immediately knows what's going on
He's surprised
He didn't know you'd be a sleepwalker
He decides to just lead you back to bed, knowing that waking you isn't the best idea
Sits you down the next morning and talks with you about it
When you seem very apologetic, he uses it to his advantage
Has you cuddle up with him even more than normal and stay by his side at all hours of the day
He still gives you some freedom
But he's always watching
He does take some precautions and ties your wrist up in the middle of the night
He has to, for your safety of course
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Billy Loomis
To be honest, you don't make it very far
Billy has an iron grip on you at all times, and he's a light sleeper
The moment you get up, he's awake, observing you carefully
Sometimes you have to pee in the middle of the night, but he still makes sure you aren't lying to him
His ability to trust is practically in the ground
The moment you turn the wrong way, he's up and chasing after you
Were you that dumb? You knew he watched you every time you got up from bed
He grabs your wrist quickly and points a knife at your throat as a threat
He can't bring himself to actually hurt you though, not that you knew that
Or did you?
Because you just stand there not even moving away from the blade
Billy becomes very confused
He takes his hand and begins to wake it in front of your face, looking for some sort of reaction
You don't give him one
Are you still... asleep?
He shakes you a bit until you finally look at him, confusion written all over your face
You're a sleepwalker, aren't you?
He just rolls his eyes annoyed and drags you back to bed, not explaining anything
Just another thing he needs to look out for now
You sometimes wake up to bruises on your hips and waist from how hard Billy holds you in the night, but he's just trying to protect you, right?
He doesn't mean to hurt you, he just refuses to lose another person in his life
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Stu Macher
Stu literally sleeps on you, so it's nearly impossible for you to leave the bed most nights
But if you somehow wiggle your way out, you wouldn't make it outside the house
The windows have been nailed so that they only open a small amount
When he finds you the next morning, curled up under a partially opened window, he just smiles
Call it naive, but he just assumes you were getting too warm in the bed
When you wake up in a confused state however, he becomes concerned
What do you mean you don't remember opening that window?
He honestly just becomes more worried that there's something wrong with your memory rather than you trying to leave him
He'll likely talk to Billy about it
He just hears laughter from the other end of the phone
"Sounds like they sleep walk," he'd say
Stu does a bunch of research on it later
He doesn't really mind though
All of the unsafe objects are already hidden away, and every possible exit is locked down
You aren't going anywhere
If anything, he finds it fun to wake up some mornings and look around for you
It's like a game, and Stu loves games
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svtskneecaps · 1 year
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i am. emotion.
#why does this. why. like number one why am i like this bc if i just wasn't like any of this then i wouldn't have problems#i feel mean i feel like i was mean and i wasn't trying to be mean and i didn't mean to be mean but there was a communication breakdown#i think i'm pretty sure there was a communication breakdown and i didn't notice in the moment because i'm an idiot#but i'm also instant replaying the entire conversation and it was texted so it ain't like i don't have the specifics#and i feel like i was mean i feel like i was teasing and didn't recognize a line that i shouldn't have hit#he didn't say anything and i don't think he's gonna and i'm probably just going to sit on it until it has a place to slot into the convo#and i can pretend that i haven't been thinking about it since i said it because like i don't want to be?? That Guy????#i already apologize for too much to the point where he fuckin outright noticed i was apologizing for everything#it wouldn't necessarily be out of left field for me to just fuckin. apologize to him out of the blue for something he might not remember#is it worse if i apologize for something that he doesn't remember or if i don't. i don't. i don't know.#my chest hurts. i don't want to be mean. i really don't want to be mean.#i don't want to be an Unsafe Person. i really don't. but i. like i mean i Know that sometimes people just take quiet note#like they think to themselves 'ok don't talk to this person about that'#and i don't want to be that!!! i don't!!!!!! but idk if it bothers him!!!!!!! but idk!!!!!!!!!#i'm going in circles. i'm losing my mind. there's a reason i put the ball in his damn court so much and it's because i don't want to fuck up#but even that is a fuckup!!!! bc then there's no reciprocation!!!! and then he asks me what's going on in my head#bc there's words behind my eyes and we both know it but even still i don't!! say them!!! bc i am so condtitioned into DO NOT SAY THAT#the mentality of DO NOT SAY THAT#it runs deep. i put it there. i can't escape it anymore. and it sucks and i don't KNOW.#i'm not even anticipating this friendship to last past the year i don't KNOW#like god i want it to god i'd love it to because he is wonderful and like i am Not Exhausted by being around him#like he is a comfortable person and i don't want to be exhausting but i feel exhausting and i have no idea#there is so much in my head right now i'm so sorry#not kpop#shut up vic#negativity
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dduane · 9 months
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I think one of the most amusing things from following you on Tumblr is when people go "wait, you wrote that?" about a series/book, like they were following you before they knew you were you.
Meanwhile, I followed you because I remember the Young Wizards books quite fondly and recognized your name when someone else I started following reblogged something of yours.
Thank you! It's always nice to be recognized. :)
...You know, though, I don't mind when the recognition sometimes gets really delayed: or maybe doesn't come at all.* I have absolutely zero problem with people following me simply because I reblog things that interest them. In fact, it's kind of encouraging, actually: that some folks like my online "company" without knowing that I've ever done anything in particular. (Not least because there are precious few of us in any branch of the media who're immune to the progression of career stages as once described to me by a producer I was working with:)
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...And if you're lucky enough to be doing this for long enough, the progression can cycle—sometimes repeatedly, so that you may sometimes not be real sure whether you're currently in (1) or (5).** :)
Anyway, thanks again.
*I mean, we've all seen even @neil-gaiman get asks from folks saying "Wait, I thought you were just some tumblr guy: who are you?" So that has to ease any putative sting, even on low-self-esteem / impostor-syndrome days.
**Or you might be at like (2) in one medium and (4) in another. Work in enough kinds of media at once, and you may wind up needing a spreadsheet. :)
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darthannie · 8 months
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thesis statement
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Pairing: professor!Jim x f!reader Summary: You accidentally bump into your Professor, Jim, at a sex shop. Word count: 3.3k Warnings: 18+ please for the love of god, age gap (reader is ~25, Jim is ~45), alcohol consumption (a few sips of wine), kissing, praise, soft dom! Jim kinda, fingering, p in v, Jim takes his time, a smidge of cockwarming, idk what else to put here! a/n: There will probably be a part two where they explore their little arrangement a bit more. Maybe it'll turn into something longer. I love Jim sm. I also want him to FUCK you know. We’ll get there, but I was feeling a lil soft. Also hmmm i wonder why Jim was at the sex shop in the first place.
It was around 5 pm on a Sunday and you were really in need of something new. Very in need. Your old toy just wasn’t cutting it anymore. To remedy this it was time for a trip to Deluxxx, your neighborhood sex shop. Your friend, Nadia, knew someone who worked there and you’d go there for all your wants and needs. You strolled in and gave a wave to the person behind the counter. 
“Hey, David! How’s the shop been treating ya?”
They looked around at the empty shop, “Hey! It’s slow but I can’t complain. What are you in for?” 
You sighed, “You remember that last toy I bought?“ 
”No way, does it suck?! It was so expensive.” 
“No, no it’s great! Gets the job done, waterproof, 10 settings-“ 
“So what’s the problem”, they asked.
You gestured in front of yourself with both hands, “It’s just… a little too small?"
They laughed and threw their head back. “Of course. Well lucky for you we got something new in recently that you might like. It’s in the back aisle, bottom shelf.” 
You thanked them and made your way to the back. You crouched down to find the one David was telling you about. It was definitely bigger than the one you had. And thicker. It didn’t have any extra frills but that wasn’t what you were looking for. You snapped a picture and sent it to Nadia with “new bf” as the caption. You let out a little laugh that was more like an exhale as you got up. Nadia has been nagging you about needing a boyfriend and you said you were just going to buy a new one. You were still looking at your phone as you turned to exit the aisle and bumped into someone. The apology on your lips died as you recognized the person in front of you as Jim, your professor and thesis advisor. 
His jaw went slack for a moment and his eyes widened as he recognized you. You were the last person he’d expect to see there but it wasn’t an unwelcome sight. He enjoyed teaching you, not knowing whether it was your interest in the subject or the fact he thought you were the most beautiful person he had ever seen. He broke eye contact for a moment, scanned your body, took note of the item in your hand, and then met your eyes again. You were suddenly very aware of your surroundings and before anyone could say anything he cleared his throat, said “Excuse me” and walked past you.
You would be lying if you said you didn’t find him attractive and it was becoming clear why you did not have a boyfriend. You wanted him. This wasn’t a new revelation by any means. Nadia was in the same class as you, and she bugged you about it almost daily. You hadn’t expected him to find you in such a vulnerable position. You collected yourself and walked swiftly to the counter and paid. Jim was long gone. You said your goodbyes to David and you texted Nadia to let her know what happened.
She called you almost immediately and opened by saying, “So you know you gotta fuck him now. Like you have to. You don’t have an option. You MUST”. You laughed. There was absolutely no way Jim wanted you. You let her know as much and she disagreed. 
“There’s no way he doesn’t want you. Come on. All the silent stares in class. Asking you to stay after. Constant emailing about things that have nothing to do with class. I mean who just emails their student a TED talk because they thought of them? All signs point to him wanting you. AND what about that one day where you teased him about not having a ring on his finger, and he just said I’m working on it? You know there was this smile he gave you afterward that I don’t think you caught. You were too busy hiding the blush on your face”
“I know I know.” You relented, “I don’t know, it just seems so far-fetched!” 
You knew that was the logical response but something was telling you Nadia was right. He had to have known that his voice sent a shiver down your spine. That you wanted him to take you right there on the table after class. You had caught him staring during class. Maybe she had a point. You couldn’t help but wonder if he really did want you too. 
Later on in the day, you got into the shower. Scalding hot water hit your back. You couldn’t help but recount the events from earlier. He had lingered, looked at the item in your hand, and raised an eyebrow. You would’ve been embarrassed if he didn’t already feel so familiar. 
Soft music played as you lathered a silky body wash along your body. Your mind started to wander, thinking about what it would be like if it were his hands instead of yours. You rinsed off the soap, running your hands over your arms and breasts all while imagining they were his. You turned off the water, dried off, and headed towards the bag you placed on your small table.
You unpackaged your new toy and went back to the bathroom to clean it. Getting back to bed, you lied down and opened up an incognito tab on your phone. You looked for some porn to watch. Once you found an adequate video, you relaxed and continued to watch. The man in the video touched the woman’s body in all the right places. He laid her down and kissed up her thighs before starting to eat her out. This was enough for you to start teasing yourself with the toy, feeling the weight of it on your clit. Suddenly the video was unnecessary. All you could think about was Jim.
You positioned it just right and started to insert it. You gasped as you felt how it stretched you out. This was what you needed. You paused the video, throwing your phone on the side to focus on the task at hand. You put the rest of it inside you and let yourself adjust to the size. You began to move the toy as you thought of him. You wondered if he felt this good. He had to feel better than this. You got off that night thinking about him and only him. When you finally came down from your high you grabbed some water, cleaned your toy, and got straight to bed. 
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You didn’t want what happened yesterday to impact your experience in class so you decided to just go on like nothing happened. 
You headed to the bathroom and began going through the movements of the morning. Before you knew it you were by the building where class was held. A bit further down the sidewalk was Jim walking from the opposite direction. The both of you got to the door at the same time. He didn’t say a thing. He just gave you a polite, awkward smile as he opened the door for you. You returned the smile and walked in. Side by side you walked to the classroom. This time you opened the door for him. You watched as he entered and mentally prepared yourself to take a class. It was just the two of you in the room. You sat at the round table with your laptop in front of you trying your best to seem busy.
He broke the silence, “Did you have a nice weekend?”
You summoned a response, “Yes, actually, I was able to spend some time with myself.”
He quipped back, “Oh, I’m sure you were.” 
Your eyes widened trying to process what he said. He let out a light chuckle as another student arrived. The class was full within the next five minutes. Nadia walked in and looked between you and him. She smirked at you. The air was buzzing for the next two hours. You could cut the tension between you two if you tried hard enough. You asked and answered questions like usual. Each time you spoke he paid extra attention to you. When class ended you began gathering your things slowly, hoping you were the last in the class. Nadia leaned over and whispered in your ear, “Just don’t do it by my seat.” You gave her a light slap on the arm and she laughed. Then, it was just you and him. He approached you and spoke softly. 
“Listen, I apologize if I overstepped a boundary with the joke I made earlier. I thought it would help ease the tension if, I don’t know-“ 
“It’s alright, Professor. We’re both mature adults who can bump into each other at a sex shop and move on with our lives.” You got up ready to leave but he spoke.
“Since when am I Professor?”, he asked. 
You looked at him confused. He clarified, “Since when do you call me Professor? You never call me Professor.”
You cleared your throat, “Well I just thought we should reestablish a professional boundary since the- you know. Keep the personal and the professional separate.”
He looked at you, pensive for a moment. He moved a bit closer to you. “Well, what if we don’t keep it separate?” 
Your eyes widened as you realized what was happening. “Are you serious?”
“Very.” He lowered his voice a bit and moved closer. He ran his hand down your arm.  His mouth was now near your ear. There was no chance someone else was going to hear him, but he whispered anyway. “I think you should come over tonight. If you want to.” 
“Yeah, I want to.” You mentally cursed yourself for caving in so quickly.  
“How’s seven?, he asked.
“Seven’s good.” Your head was spinning. This was happening.
“I’ll also need your number so I can send you the address.” He handed you his phone with a new contact page open. You entered it in, gave him a shy smile, and turned to leave.
He grabbed your wrist before you were able to move away from him. “By the way, leave your new purchase at home. You’re not going to need it.” 
Summoning some courage, you leaned in to kiss him. He didn’t close the gap all the way. “Let’s save it for tonight.”, he said as he pulled away. He gathered his things without looking at you and left. 
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When you returned home you threw your stuff down and immediately called Nadia. “I KNEW IT!" she yelled. “I KNEW that’s why you hung back. God, it was so tense between you two.”
“You could tell?” You didn’t think it was that obvious until she chuckled and said that everyone could tell. The rest of the conversation consisted of Nadia giving you a pep talk and making her promise you’d tell her everything.  
As time passed you got more nervous. Around six you received a text from him telling you to wear something comfortable, along with his address. You sent a very quick response and, per his request, put on something comfortable. It would end up on the floor anyway. He didn’t live very far from you, which was lucky. You wondered if this would be a one-time thing. What would class be like now? I graduate soon anyway, you thought. If this all went south you could just forget it happened. You got to his apartment a couple of minutes before 7 and he let you up. When you got to the door you knocked twice and waited.
You’d never seen him so casual and… nervous. “Please, come in! You can put your things wherever you’d like,” he said. 
You looked around at his apartment. You could tell a professor lived there. Bookshelves lined the walls. On the dining table, there was a bottle of wine with two glasses. You put down your bag near the door. You didn’t know what to do with your hands. He noticed your apprehension. 
“Do you like wine? I got a nice Malbec after class today. Thought we could crack open a bottle.” 
“Yes, I’d like that very much.”
“Nerves?”
“Yeah.”, you confirmed.
“Me too. But, uh, there’s nothing to be nervous about. It’s just me.”
He smiled and the tension in your body slipped away. It was replaced by a sense of calm. Jim was letting you into his home, and into his life. You sat down at the table and he removed the cord from the bottle. You watched his hands work, feeling eager to get them on you. But that had to wait, he was about to take his time. He poured you and himself a glass. You sat across from him and took a sip, hoping its effects would be immediate. 
“I’m glad you came. You know, I thought you’d think I was too old for you.” And he might’ve been. Twenty years was a healthy gap but it wasn’t anything you wouldn’t indulge in. Hell, if you could, you’d date him. 
“Not at all.” You replied. “I can’t lie, I’ve been thinking about it all year.”
“About what?”, he pushed.
“About… seeing you.”
“You can say it.” He noticed your blush. 
“I want to hear you say it.”, he egged you on.
You sighed, trying to muster up the words. “I’ve been thinking about… being with you all year.”
“And doing what?”, he took another sip of his wine and raised an eyebrow. “Do you want me to say it?”
“Yes.”, There was no way you would be able to admit it to him fully.
“You want your professor to fuck you. You want me to take you to my room, undress you, and take care of you better than anyone ever has.”
Your face was red. “Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.” You drank from your glass. 
“Come here.”, he spoke softly and you got up. “Straddle me, love.” 
You sat on his lap and he looked up at you, grinning ear to ear. He brought his hand up to your neck and pulled you down to kiss him. It was brief. He pulled away and looked into your eyes. Then he kissed you again. And, again. Then, he started kissing your neck. You couldn’t help but let out a small moan as you felt him getting hard underneath you. He kissed and nipped at your skin. His hands reached the hem of your shirt and he pulled it off before you could register it happening. Once it did, you helped him out of his. 
He tapped your ass a couple times, silently saying get up. He walked you backward and pushed you up against a nearby wall. He started removing a bra strap, but you stopped him.
“Well don’t get shy on me now.”, he chuckled. “Come.” He reached out his hand and you grabbed it. He led you down the hall to his bedroom and you sat down on the bed. You took your cues from him. As he started to lean over, you began to lay down. His hand was unhooking your bra with one hand. He was finicking with it and after a few moments, it was off. The cool air hitting your nipples caused them to rise. Jim kissed you again, then kissed down your neck, and finally put his hands on you. He licked, sucked, and grabbed your breasts. 
“You’re so beautiful. Even more gorgeous than I could have imagined. Baby, I need to taste you.” 
You wanted to protest but your pants were already coming off. Your panties followed. He groaned, “Fuck, baby, all this for me?
Before you could respond he kissed the inside of your thigh, then down, down, down until he reached your pussy. You were so wet for him already. He used his fingers first, wanting to feel you first. 
“You always get this wet for your Professor?”
“Yes.”, you responded breathlessly. His fingers were moving in and out of you. Slowly at first and then faster. He hit that perfect spot each time. Then he added his mouth. This time he didn’t go slow. He was licking and sucking on your clit. You moaned out his name and he smiled. He ate you out like his life depended on it. No one had ever done this to you. No one had ever paid this much attention to your body. You were a whimpering mess. His hand found its way back to your nipple, rolling it between his fingers. He then squeezed, hard, which made you load loudly. 
“Please Jim, I’m gonna cum.”, you plead. 
 He got you close to the edge and then pulled away. You whimpered at the loss of him. “Please, keep going.”
“No, if you’re gonna cum, I’m gonna be inside of you.” He took off the rest of his clothing. You moaned at the sight of him. He was right. You would never need the toy again. You couldn’t wait for him to be inside of you. He knew this and instead decided to tease you with his cock. He dragged it along you and tapped your clit the same way you did with your toy at home. Only this was a hundred times better.  
He nipped at your ear and whispered. “You really want it, huh?”
“Yes,” you begged “It’s all I want.” 
He grinned and entered you slowly and without warning. Your jaw dropped slightly. You couldn’t even make a sound, you were too busy with the feeling of him filling you up entirely. He let out a sigh and grabbed your chin.
“Look at me. Open your eyes. Look at me while I fuck you.” You did as he said. He started to pick up the pace. He was making this intimate. He caressed your face and made almost as much noise as you did. “Good girl. You’re such a good girl, following directions. Ready for another one?” You nodded. 
“Get on top. Sit down on my cock.” You started moving before he even finished his sentence. There was no room for shyness anymore. He sat up against the headboard as you sunk down on him; the new angle was doing wonders for the both of you. He thrusted up, wanting to feel more of you. He held you close to him as you began to ride him. 
“You sure know how to treat a girl, Professor.”, you said breathlessly.
He chuckled and kissed you. “You sure know how to treat your Professor. You’re being so good for me. Such a good girl.”
His hand found its way back to your clit, his thumb rubbing circles. He wanted to make sure you came first.
And you did.
It came in waves. You felt it build up and told him you were close. Then, you fell apart. You pulled him close and kissed him passionately. He wrapped his arms around you and whispered sweet nothings in your ear as you came. 
“That’s it, baby. So, so good for me. God, such a pretty little thing.“ He took control, holding you up and thrusting into you. The sensation was almost too much to bear. 
“Where do you want it.”, he asked.
“Inside. Please. I’m on the-“
“Are you sure, love?” You could tell he couldn’t wait any longer. 
You begged, “Yes. Yes, I am, just please cum inside me.”
And he did.
He filled you to the brim. You felt him twitch inside of you as his hips stuttered. He held onto you so tightly you were sure it would leave marks. You were both breathing hard. He stayed inside of you and held you against him. He put his forehead against yours as you regained your breath. 
He kissed you again, this time not wanting to pull away. But, you did. You pulled yourself off of him and laid down as the realization of what you did started sinking in. He lied down next to you and stared at the ceiling.
Silence. And after a few moments, you turned your head and spoke.
“So, is this it?” It came out more timid than you would have liked it to. 
He gave you a look you couldn’t quite place and after a moment he said, “Oh, love, you’re mine now.”
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neopuppy · 7 months
Note
Bestfriend Jeno who invades readers privacy and goes through her computer filled with videos of ykyk💀
warnings. errrhhmmm🤔 masturbation, yeah..
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“Damn, he really did a number on your phone.” Jeno’s fingers drag down the shatter of cracks distorting your screen, neck ticking to the side. “I can definitely fix it though.”
“You can?”
“Yeah, I worked at one of those phone repair kiosks a couple summers ago, these screens cost a fortune to get fixed you know? I have a lot of leftover supplies, can probably find something in my stash that will fit.” He informs, patting your shoulder. “Means you’ll have to be disconnected all day though, is that okay?”
“I guess, have some lectures to get through and a group project to finish so I’ll be at the library most of the day if anything.”
“Alright, write down your passcode and maybe your apple log in just in case.” Jeno nods to a notebook, grabbing a pen to hand you.
“Why the log in?” You hesitate, eyeing your phone nervously.
Jeno shrugs, holding your phone out to you. “I only want to help, I know you’re kind of down on your luck right now. I understand if you want to be around when I fix it but today’s one of my only free days for the rest of the week, so..”
“No no, it’s fine.” You sigh, pushing the phone back toward him. “I might be back late, don’t know how long this meeting with my group will take. If you could leave my phone on DND? I’ll probably still be texting from my laptop.”
“Yeah, not a problem.” Jeno nods to his notebook, smiling as you scribble down your passcode and password. “I’ll get this all fixed up for you, free of charge.”
“I’ll have to repay you somehow..”
“What are friends for?” He laughs, motioning to the living room area scattered with your belongings. “Shit happens..”
“Thanks Jeno, everything you guys have done for me..” trailing off, you murmur shyly. “I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to repay you and Jaemin for helping me out like this.”
“Don’t worry about it, focus on school.”
After bidding you goodbye and good luck with your project, Jeno moves to his bedroom, whistling to himself as he traces down the largest crack on your phone screen. “Gosh, what a dick..”
He didn’t ask what the fight was about, the timing didn’t feel right with you sniffling as he and Jaemin helped you carry your belongings in. He never liked your boyfriend much anyway, or well, ex-boyfriend..
Jeno boiled it down to jealousy at times, whenever he’d have to witness the unfortunate public displays of affection between the two of you. It’s not that he likes you, not necessarily.. but your friendship hadn’t exactly stemmed from genuine interest in forming a platonic relationship. It just so happened that while he had one idea, your mind had already honed in and focused on another.
“Eh, I always knew he wasn’t right for you.” Jeno mumbles to himself, tapping your phone screen to the image of your now ex-boyfriend’s lips squished against your cheek. “Gross.”
Jeno gets to it, unwrapping a new razor to begin removing the old screen topper first and see the real damage. Lucky for you, he’d gifted you a durable screen protector when you’d gotten a new phone. Great for dropping, not so much for a crazy boyfriend hurling it at a wall though.
He’s pleased to see the damage is a lot more minor under the protector, mentally patting himself on the back for handling that for you in the first place. A text pops up lighting the bare screen. “Oh right, do not disturb.”
Jeno taps in the passcode, swiping down to turn off notifications only to come to a pause as another text comes in.
‘It’s easy money, I did it my first year of college to cover rent, and you're shit out of luck at this point if you think a dorm will open up this far into the semester.’
He knows he shouldn’t, but there’s no way you’d find out anyway..
‘Isn’t that prostitution?’
The last text sent from you has his eyes going wide, quickly reading through the chat between you and the name he recognizes as your best friends, the same one whose car Jaemin had found you using as a makeshift home..
‘It’s not illegal in our state, and it’s anonymous. You won’t get caught or anything. Trust me, I worked there for 11 months, best money I’ve ever made.’
Jeno mumbles a ‘what the fuck.’ To himself, opening his phone to copy down the address she sends in next.
‘Besides, what difference does it make? You were getting fucked by your asshole ex on stream for way less.’
“What?!” Jeno looks around in shock, covering his mouth in case someone else is home. An arsenal of unanswered questions race through his mind, swiping to put your phone on ‘do not disturb’ finally as he takes a deep breath to calm down.
“There’s no way..” he chuckles, licking his lips nervously as he taps open your photos and scrolls until a locked album named ‘delete’ catches his eye.
Jeno spent a year learning different ways to break into stolen phones with not even a passcode to assist, the thrill of unknown has his thumb punching away before he can even talk himself out of it. Not that he would..
Why wouldn’t you immediately delete photos or videos you wouldn’t want anyone to see anyway? You can’t be that stupid..
“Oh shit.”
You are that stupid.
Jeno groans, leaning back in his computer chair as he slowly scrolls through the album of over 1000 photos and videos, most consisting of topless shots. More scandalous as he reaches the middle and sucks in a deep breath reading the time on the first video he sees.
Eight minutes and twenty seven seconds..
Patting around for his headphones, he plugs them in and opens the video up to hit play, sinking deeper into his seat as your face appears half-fucked out with dreamy eyes and saliva wet lips.
The deeper familiar voice he recognizes as your ex’s comes through, making his stomach tighten. “Fuck.”
‘How can you ask me for more after I just fucked you full?’
‘Please daddy, n-need more.’
The camera runs down your bare body, laid back against dark sheets with your thighs hoisted up and open; panning down to where white streaks of cum paint your stomach and mound. ‘Feel that? My dicks still so hard.’
‘Keep fucking me, don’t stop fucking me. Fuck that cum deep inside of me.’
Jeno pants, short of breath as he digs the heel of his palm against his groin and groans. Fuck fuck fuck… he knew it. The past few years of having to pretend he valued your friendship more than his desire to fuck you, he always knew you were nothing but a pathetic sobbing whore. The sound of your sobs and aroused whines vibrating through his ears has him ready to make a mess, smoothing in past the waistband of his sweats to free his length, he’s thankful for the point of view shot; making it easy to tune out the masculine grunts passing between your pretty cries.
‘Fuck. I’ll breed you better than that.’ Jeno voices to himself, surprised your lazy ex didn’t make you get on top. The amount of cum covering your lower half has his hips jumping from the chair, eager to fuck into his fist faster.
One thought continues to pass through his mind as he grips around his cock and strokes to match the pace pushing you up and down along the screen.
He needs to fuck you.
1K notes · View notes
evilwizard · 2 months
Text
I do want to say, my views on AI “art” have changed somewhat. It was wrong of me to claim that it’s not wrong to use it in shitposts… there definitely is some degree of something problematic there.
Personally I feel like it’s one of those problems that’s best solved via lawmaking—specifically, AI generations shouldn’t be copywrite-able, and AI companies should be fined for art theft and “plagiarism”… even though it’s not directly plagiarism in the current legal sense. We definitely need ethical philosophers and lawmakers to spend some time defining exactly what is going on here.
But for civilians, using AI art is bad in the same nebulous sense that buying clothes from H&M or ordering stuff on Amazon is bad… it’s a very spread out, far away kind of badness, which makes it hard to quantify. And there’s no denying that in certain contexts, when applied in certain ways (with actual editing and artistic skill), AI can be a really interesting tool for artists and writers. Which again runs into the copywrite-ability thing. How much distance must be placed between the artist and the AI-generated inspiration in order to allow the artist to say “this work is fully mine?”
I can’t claim to know the answers to these issues. But I will say two things:
Ignoring AI shit isn’t going to make it go away. Our tumblr philosophy is wildly unpopular in the real world and most other places on the internet, and those who do start using AI are unfortunately gonna have a big leg up on those who don’t, especially as it gets better and better at avoiding human detection.
Treating AI as a fundamental, ontological evil is going to prevent us from having these deep conversations which are necessary for us—as a part of society—to figure out the ways to censure AI that are actually helpful to artists. We need strong unions making permanent deals now, we need laws in place that regulate AI use and the replacement of humans, and we need to get this technology out of the hands of huge megacorporations who want nothing more than to profit off our suffering.
I’ve seen the research. I knew AI was going to big years ago, and right now I know that it’s just going to get bigger. Nearly every job is in danger. We need to interact with this issue—sooner rather than later—or we risk losing all of our futures. And unfortunately, just as with many other things under capitalism, for the time being I think we have to allow some concessions. The issue is not 100% black or white. Certainly a dark, stormy grey of some sort.
But please don’t attack middle-aged cat-owners playing around with AI filters. Start a dialogue about the spectrum of morality present in every use of AI—from the good (recognizing cancer cells years in advance, finding awesome new metamaterials) to the bad (megacorporations replacing workers and stealing from artists) to the kinda ambiguous (shitposts, app filter that makes your dog look like a 16th century British royal for some reason).
And if you disagree with me, please don’t be hateful about it. I fully recognize that my current views might be wrong. I’m not a paragon of moral philosophy or anything. I’m just doing my best to live my life in a way that improves the world instead of detracting from it. That’s all any of us can do, in my opinion.
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sugawarassoulmate · 1 year
Text
someone else tries to get with them
feat: bully!osamu, best friend!iwa, and rich bf!sakusa inspired by
part 2
cw: fem!reader
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bully!osamu
you wanted to be anywhere but here right now, listening to this girl act as if she was your friend. you'd much rather be home, or at work, or at the library—quite literally anywhere but in front of this person you barely knew.
"i just think that osamu is a bit more extroverted and you might be too shy for him!" she said in a shrill, condescending voice. "he's always going to all these parties and i always see him talking to people...maybe he should date someone that's a more like him, you know?"
she must not know osamu all that well. he only goes to those parties because his brother or one of his friends drags him there and he spends the entire night blowing up your phone. as for talking to people, osamu can barely remember the name of his own lab partner, so it wouldn't surprise you if he got into meaningless conversations with people just to pass the time.
but on the surface, it looks as if one of the most popular guys on campus decided to date his weird, quiet childhood best friend and some people appeared to have a problem with that.
you tried to walk away from the conversation but the girl was persistent, not letting you leave until you vowed to leave osamu alone.
"don't you think it's selfish to stay with him when the two of you are so different?"
before you could respond—what you were going to say, you still had no idea—you were yanked into a solid figure, one you immediately recognized as your boyfriend already huffing in annoyance.
"been lookin' everywhere fer ya, jesus christ," he chastises, planting a quick kiss on the side of your head. "c'mon, let's go home—"
"samu! hiiii, i was actually just talking about y—"
osamu doesn't pay the girl any mind, rolling his eyes as he continues talking to you. "who the fuck is that? this is why i can't leave ya alone, babe. yer always talkin' to weirdos, let's go."
osamu pulls you away to talk about plans for dinner, leaving the strange girl dumbfounded by what she just witnessed.
best friend!iwa
"do you know if iwaizumi is seeing anyone?" the girl asked as she approached you on campus. it wasn't uncommon for random girls to come out of the woodwork to ask you about your best friend—he's a sweet, respectful, incredibly handsome man.
most of these girls figured that if they could get on your sweet side, they could get closer to their dream man. little did they know you were judging them every second they spoke to you.
when was the last time she even bothered washing her hair? or ew, her voice is annoying, haji would hate that. you let them get through their whole spiel, how they've liked iwa for ages but didn't know how to approach him and how they have a whole date planned, only for you to throw down the proverbial hammer.
"i'm sorry, haji isn't actually interested in dating anyone right now. he's really focused on his studies," you said confidently, watching the light in their eyes die.
"oh, but—"
"yeah, i would really give up if i were you," you shrugged, walking away before she could get another word in.
if anything, you were doing iwa a favor. there was no way he'd be interested in a girl like that. besides, if he got into a relationship now, he'd be too distracted to spend time with you.
"who were you talking you?" iwaizumi asks a bit later, noticing the weird interaction you had with a girl he didn't recognize.
"ugh, just another bimbo asking me about oikawa again," you lied so easily, throwing your legs over iwaizumi's lap as the two of you sat in the campus lounge. "you'd think they'd give it a break already."
iwaizumi doesn't question it. why would he? as far as he knew, you had nothing to gain by lying to him.
rich bf!sakusa
sakusa told you he had to take an important phone call and stepped away, leaving you in the shop. though, you weren't left alone for long. a few moments later you could hear incessant giggling behind you and after a while, you got the feeling it was about you.
turning around, you see a face that you're sure you've seen before but couldn't exactly place where. she must have known you, though, as she had no issue judging you with her eyes. "so kiyoomi does leave his little pet unattended. it's hard to recognize you when you're not in his shadow."
she was flanked on either side by one of her equally pompous, identical-looking friends, who both laughed at her cruel joke.
"excuse me?" fully turning around, you finally got a good look at the woman and realized that she was the daughter of a colleague that sakusa's father knew. you vaguely remembered your boyfriend complaining about having to entertain his father's guests during a boring gala a few weeks ago.
it wasn't uncommon for women to flaunt themselves at sakusa. he was the son of a prominent ceo, the heir to a successful company, and is absolutely breathtaking when he bothers to put his face mask down.
"it's just cute that kiyoomi still bothers to keep you around but he's always loved doing charity work." you weren't sure what was worse, her pathetic attempts to get a rise out of you or the shrill laughter of her air-headed friends. "our fathers are very close so don't be surprised when i'm the one on his arm whenever he gets tired of you."
"i'll be sure to remember that," you shrug your shoulders, turning your attention back to the rack of stupid clothes sakusa wanted you to try on. another day, another stupid business dinner with more spoiled brats of his father's stupid colleagues.
you tried to ignore the constant snicker, how they loudly wondered if you could even afford the clothes you were looking at—of course, you couldn't but sakusa loved to spoil you despite your attempts to dissuade him.
the teasing gets the better of you and you're about to snap back at them when the noises finally stop. you weren't sure when sakusa walked back into the store but he's by your side, staring daggers at the girl and her clique.
"and you shouldn't be surprised if my father never does business with yours again," he says curtly. his features soften the second he locks eyes with you. "here, babe. this gown will look perfect on you. go try it on for me."
the other girl tries to get a word in but she's stopped dead in her tracks by sakusa's harsh gaze returning to her. "you can go. i don't associate with trash."
the trio of mean girls drop the pieces they were looking at and scurry out of the store before they could embarrass themselves yet again. "do we still have to do this dumb business dinner?"
sakusa snorts, pushing you towards the dressing room. "of course, love, don't be foolish. you're going to be the most beautiful woman there.”
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