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crystallilytarot · 4 months

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Choose a coffee cup. How will your future partner show their love and jealousy

(there's a little mention of some 18+ stuff. MDNI)

Pile 1

It's like a puppy who is happy when their owner is home hehe. They are so happy when looking at you. Heart eyes, literally. They want to make your every wish come true. A genie. A little bit of a Daddy /Mommy vibe, but you will be spoiled, they want to buy you everything. Even if they act like they are grumpy and doesn't want to do something, they can't say no to you. Jewelry, a lot. Definitely gift giving is one of their love language. Trips, little vacations, a weekend get-away. And they are very patient, understanding, caring too. I heard a gentle giant. Even if they aren't so much bigger or stronger physically, but I think they are older. And a bear, but like a real life teddy bear. Altough they may look like a serious person, they are a softie at heart, at least for you, definitely. And if you have any mental or physical problems, ever, they will be so caring, protective and understanding.

If they are jealous. At first they will act like they aren't jealous. But they will be very insecure. Anxious even. I feel there will be even more gifts. Like they say in this way, that nobody else can take care of you like me. I can give you everything, don't look at others! They definitely want to have sex with you that day. Want to show you that they can take care of you in the bedroom too. A little possessiveness, nothing toxic. But if you want children, they would like to well, give it a try that night. A little like a marking kink, but it's not always like that. It can be when they give you the ring, when proposing, they see it like you belong together. They want to have you just for themself. But it's their secret kinda, they try to act like they aren't that possessive, they just can't even think about you being with someone else, it would hurt them so much.

Pile 2

A no nonsense person, they are not a player. If they like you, they will show you. I don't think they are very comfortable with speaking about all these romantic feelings, but they will show you with their actions. They are always there when you need them. If you need something, they will drive all night to you. If they are in the other side of the world, they will try to go to you as soon as possible. Maybe not a lot of speaking but a lot of messages. Good morning texts. A little sweet message. They are very giving. With their money too, and with their time, energy. Always going out of their way to help you in any way possible. You can share the responsibilities, the stress, the burdens with them. You have a partner, you don't need to do anything alone. You will feel like you belong with them. Definitely want to marry you, and I think your values will be the same too.

If they are jealous. Well, they are not really jealous. Very mature, they trust you, so it's rare that they are jealous. If they feel like something is wrong, they will try to speak about it with you or try to find a solution. Maybe try to solve it alone. Sometimes you won't even know. But they thought that you liked a shirt on someone else, they will buy something similar. Actions, so they don't show it really, they can act a little differently. If someone is bothering you, however they will talk with them. Can say a little harsher things to them too. But it's rare. I feel in this situation, they are so authorative, maybe they have a strict voice, so nobody will mess with you. I mean, you can go out with your friends, they won't be a very controlling person, but if someone don't leave you alone, well, I won't be that person.

Pile 3

You will feel safe and sound with them. Calm, and peaceful life. If you had a trauma, any bad experience, they will help you heal. You will be more confident. I think you will even have more energy, vitality. They are romantic, there will be a lot of romantic surprises, love notes, love songs. Lot of emotions here and they are not shy to tell you how much you means to them. They will compliment you a lot. Likes to go on romantic programs with you. I love you-s, cute nicknames. Tell you like every day that you are the most beautiful person in the whole universe.

If they are jealous. Oh, no. They will feel so sad, heartbroken. Don't make them jealous intentionally, because it's not something that brings spark in the relationship for them. They will feel betrayed. Even if you didn't do anything, they don't know what to do. Probably need some time alone. In the end of the day, they will realize that they can trust you, but they need to be alone a little with their thoughts, because it will bother them a lot. At first they can be grumpy, and they don't even know why. Until they think about it a little and realize that something made them jealous. Maybe they would feel bad about it, even if they weren't really mad, but probably after that, they will try to do something romantic. At least a bouquet of flower definitely.

#free tarot #pick a card #tarot #pick a pile #18+ tarot

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loveyourlovelysoul · 5 months

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Choose a number 1-30 and read a sentence for you in time of needs. You can ofc read them all.

1- You're braver than you think. You can get through this too. Just take a breath and then start again. Do not give up.

2- You're not alone even if at times it feels so. Don't worry about being a burden or annoying others: ask for help, talk about your needs and feelings. You don't have to deal with all that by yourself. Keep asking even after being rejected. Someone will answer you.

3- Look inside and see your real worth. No one else can compare to you. You're you, and you're enough and deserving already as you are. Don't let others' harsh judgement make you think otherwise.

4- Life is made of light and dark and so are you. Find your balance again among the two and keep going. It'll be fine, no feeling is going to last forever.

5- Things look scarier and rockier cause they're changing (you're changing too). It's okay to feel uncomfortable and a bit loss or overwhelmed: give yourself time until you find a new balance in your new reality. It won't be bad, I promise.

6- Go slow, take your time. Nothing and nobody is rushing behind you. It's okay to take breaks, it's okay if you're taking a bit more time than you thought in doing something. Focus on the journey not on how much time you're using or thinking you're wasting. You're not wasting time when you use it for yourself. But worrying will make you lose a part of it and hurt you even more.

7- Try to believe that things can change. Be open to them, even if you cannot control this process and see how it is gonna be, chances are it will be great. Trust yourself too (not your fears though, separate from them).

8- You're on the road of success, whether you see it or not. Keep learning, keep welcoming (your feelings in particular): the more grounded and stable you will be able to be, the more opportunities you'll be able to see and make yours.

9- Always be kind and compassionate with yourself: the mistakes you made today won't ever be the mistakes of tomorrow. Making mistakes is a way of learning, not a confirmation of you not being enough. Nobody ever has made no mistakes while trying or becoming better at something. Be patient and give yourself another chance (and even more).

10- Remember the last decision in your life is always up to you: you're the protagonist of your life, don't let it pass you by. Even if at the moment you cannot see a way out, it will come to you. Keep staying hopeful. Keep focusing on what you can actually control, be it even just your feelings.

11- You're not responsible for anyone's feelings or emotions. Remember you cannot control how they react to you or anything really, and you don't have to necessarily make everything better for others. Respect yourself too.

12- Be confident in your abilities and knowledge. Do not second guess yourself cause you were somehow taught you're not good enough: you are. And you can be wrong here and there too and it won't change your worth ever. Trust yourself whether you're right or wrong and soon you'll be just right.

13- Remember that as you give, you also need to receive from others as much. Stay open to that. You don't have to just empty yourself in order to get crumbles or the bear minimum: that's not what healthy relationships are about.

14- Set your boundaries and stand up for yourself. You're not being selfish for this, as you're not imposing on or taking advantages of others. You're just putting yourself on the same page as them, you need as much respect and love as them.

15- Take care of you: stay hydrated, make your bed, take a shower, go for a walk, enjoy a nice book or video or movie, sing, dance, paint... prepare yourself a nice cup of tea and treat yourself with a little gift here and there. You deserve all this, especially when things get rocky and too much to bear with. Celebrate your little successes too.

16- Surround yourself with the right people for you. If you cannot get away from some negative people, try at least to build boundaries and find other people with whom you can share nice moments of peace and growth, and that can get your feelings too. It's important to communicate with people that can understand us.

17- If you feel alone, try to go out and go visit place where you may find like-minded people. Join a volunteering association, go to a movie teather, a park or a library, or start a course of something you're passionate about. Sometimes we need to be the one creating opportunities to ourselves instead of waiting for others to approach us first.

18- It's okay to feel lost while trying to figure out what to do or where to go. Take a breath when this happens and focus on just doing things you like. The more you'll get to know yourself and work on something you enjoy, the faster you'll get to understand more about the next steps to take. Ask to someone trusted for their advice as well: many times people around us can see us better than what we do. Just remember that not everyone can really do that anyway so trust yourself first.

19- You don't have to work on your fears anytime you get triggered or feel overwhelmed. Take a break, focus on something else and come back to it another day. Taking breaks is part of the healing process as much as working with your shadows and triggers, so take time to enjoy your present life away from that too.

20- Help yourself liberating from the excess of energy, caused by anxiety and overthinking, that you may have stored in your body. Move your body: walk, dance, do yoga or any little light exercise (as much as you body allows). Go back to yourself, get in touch with your body and release what is not serving you anymore.

21- Journaling can help you wording and throwing out your confused thoughts, in order to clear them from the inside. You don't have to write them reasonably, this will come later: just focus on freeing yourself first and foremost. At times we just need to pour emotions/events out to process them.

22- Trauma may have caused you to detach from yourself, so take time know yourself again. Know your values and what you can compromise on and why. List things you like and dislike, what you think are your strengths and what may be your flaws (be objective here, don't let others or your wounds decide for you) and so on... you make the rules. Making lists of pros and cons for something may also be useful.

23- As we never stop learning, we never stop making mistakes and growing. Share everything you got around you, keep welcoming and understanding yourself and the world around you. Keep spreading your talents: yes you do have talents, and no they're not negative ones. Allow yourself to try anything you want: who cares if others do it too? They are not doing it better than you, they're doing it differently. See yourself where you can get just by trying with no pressure.

24- You can also try something new and different from what you're used: getting out of your comfort zone can be very inspiring both for your creativity, your mind and your life in general (and in knowing yourself). Share your finds, share your passions. Don't be shy.

25- Having being judged so harshly during your life has probably made you more insecure and willing to close off from the world: please try and allow yourself to see that even if it hurt you so much, it wasn't on you. You weren't the real object of those judgement. It is always all in the head of the person judging, it's never on the object. Be nicer with you, you're worth much more than that.

26- What is really stopping you from trying what you have in mind? Fear of making or not making? Either way, take your fear by the hand and take it to see how is it gonna be for real. Our minds want to keep us safe and try to make things look worse than they actually are just cause they want to keep us in a known zone. But what if that's not where we're supposed to stay? Or where we want to stay?

27- Don't fear: you won't be let down forever nor you won't be alone forever. Your people are coming, try to get ready to meet them and let them in. You're not made for everyone and, if your past has been tough, you may fear not being good enough for the relationship (any type) of your dreams, but you are. And you'll have the chance to build it the moment you'll be ready for it.

28- You may not trust others much out of past hurt, but the fact is that it's never your fault what others do with your trust. You don't have to feel guilty or any less cause you trusted the wrong people. It wasn't your fault.

29- Take your time when you need to bring yourself closure about an event or a relationship. Go slow and try to welcome and nurture each of your emotions and feelings, of whatever type they may be. Ask for support, talk about how you really feel, write, and slowly go back to your passion. Act according on what you feel like doing. Do not make sudden decisions and also, take time to grieve and cry. Grieving is complex, you'll experience ups and downs: it's okay, give yourself time and space to deal with all that at your own pace and conditions.

30- Healing is not about not being triggered anymore and feeling like nothing can scare you: healing is about learning how to recognize your triggers before they hurt you and taking action so that these emotions won't overcome you as they did. It's about learning to not let your fears decide your actions, but taking actions even if not knowing the results feels really uncomfortable and scary. It's about learning to be in discomfort and not letting this ruin your whole life.

---

I hope these short texts can help you in your journey. I hope you take care of your whole being even if you don't really love yourself. I hope you can see yourself as someone you may end up liking after chatting a bit or as someone in need and that you may want to support. Start with that. And be open to see your good sides too, cause you have plenty even on your darkest days (they never disappear).

#words #healing #important #positivity #thoughts #self love #self healing #positive thinking #healingjourney #self care #life #life lessons #slef care #self embrace #self help #self support #encouraging words #encouragement

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overthinkinglotr · 8 months

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People always say “Thorin could never retire in the Shire because he has to be King” — and I think the funniest way to handle that plotline would be for Bilbo to convince Thorin to eliminate the monarchy.

Bilbo has lived all his life in the Shire, where they elect their main leaders in a democratic system. Thorin is the first king he ever meets. Bilbo would initially think monarchy was very storybook-like and fantastical, like the things he’s read about in tales from distant lands…..but he would quickly find the reality of monarchy underwhelming, baffling, and annoying. Thorin/ Thranduil/Bard would make Bilbo decide that all monarchies are terrible. Being a king makes you self-important, haughty, greedy, and warlike. Kings are too powerful and use that power to fight over utter nonsense. They’ve got no one to keep their stubbornness in check. He would come to decide that the Shire really did have it right by holding elections.

I’m imagining a scene where Thorin dramatically confesses “I suffer under the burden of my duties; heavy is the head that bears a crown” and Bilbo flatly responds “don’t be king, then. >:/Elect someone else. If your people don’t want you then they won’t choose you! Im very tired of this whole affair and I wish I were back in the Shire, where folk are more reasonable >:(“

Thorin is enchanted by the strange foreign Hobbit custom of “elected leaders.” He has never considered this as a possibility. Overwhelmed by the Hobbit’s wisdom after the Battle of the Five Armies, Thorin converts his kingdom into a democratic republic and retires from public life.

This causes a domino effect. Other kingdoms across Middle Earth are inspired by Erebor’s example, and band together to reject their monarchical systems. Revolutions ensue.

Thorin’s consort “Bilbo Baggins,” known only as “the dwarf-king’s advisor who first set off this wave of revolutions,” becomes one of the most controversial and reviled people in all of Middle Earth. Bilbo becomes a figure of mythic proportions, loved by the democratic republicans and despised by the royalists, each of which invents their own wild legends.

To the democratic republicans “The Great Baggins” is glorified as a great warrior sent from Valinor to restore the long-forgotten wisdom borne out of The West— he snaps his fingers and with a poof of smoke he washes away all the old corrupt systems of the world, just as the Valar washed away Numenor.

But to the royalists, “The Mad Baggins” is a scheming shadowy monster who crawled up from the deep places of the world to burn the very foundations of Middle Earth to the ground; he’s a monster more powerful and terrible than a dragon or a balrog, who threatened Thorin into submission and brought the world into chaos. he snaps his fingers and monarchies collapse in a puff of smoke.

Meanwhile elderly Bilbo grumpily putters around the Shire with Thorin, mostly oblivious to all of this.

#and that’s my reshirement au. like comment and subscribe #read my webcomic adaptation of the hobbit *dabs*#lotr #the hobbit #Bagginshield #lord of the rings #I would write this fic but I’m already making high effort hobbit fanfic #don’t know if I have the energy for another one XD

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ushiromiya · 9 months

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(madoka magica / rebellion spoilers below. TW: suicide and controlling behavior)

I don't know the direction in which walpurgisnacht rising will take homura's character but I can say with confidence that from at least where rebellion left off that I truly believe that homura made the decision that she felt was the most correct one even if it meant she had to become a monster in the eyes of every person that loved her. she felt that if things were left in the way the law of the cycle was currently running things that it was inevitable that kyubey would eventually capture madoka in her goddess form, study her, and use her to as a source for mass amounts of energy at the suffering of herself, the others within the law of the cycle, and magical girls at large again. this is something he explains very clearly when talking to homura before her transformation into homulilly.

I get so exhausted when I see people try characterize homura as an actually evil person with completely selfish desires and no regard for others. all of her actions, while not explicitly explained outright, when looked at closely always indicate that she does things out of her care for the other girls but feels like she bears the burden of having to do it alone because she believes she's the only one who doesn't let her emotions get in the way of protecting madoka and the others from kyubey and sometimes each other.

I will always use the scenes of her interactions with mami and sayaka in rebellion as huge examples of this. she has no reason not to kill them if she's a completely selfish and unemphatic person that only cares about madoka and no one else when given many opportunities to do so. I also don't personally think she keeps them around JUST because of madoka's happiness either. she very easily could have suppressed their roles in madoka's life with the world rewrite and clearly choose not to. I believe her mocking sayaka and acting in a clearly "evil" manner is deliberate acting on her part to frame herself as a villain. she might believe this would her actions more palatable and will create distance between herself and everyone else to protect them as well as allow her to assert more control in this situation. it is further emphasized how she truly feels with imagery displayed in homura's new world around herself (shoes abandoned on the side of a building to potentially indicate suicidal ideation, a half moon alluding to homura feeling unfulfilled and unhappy with this decision, her dancing around happily before stopping and slowly falling off the cliff side with a similar implication as the shoes).

homura's relationship with the others is incredibly complicated but she cares for them deeply too as they are also people she considers friends, she just had a particularly strong attachment to madoka. we don't get to see as many instances of her interacting with them as we do them interacting with each other as we are unfortunately only really privy to homura's life after she began looping for the most part but we can see it in the way she has expresses concern and distress for them in moments where she believes they are in real, tangible danger of being hurt (she's winces and tries to turn away when aiming for mami's leg and screams out when she believes mami is about to be truly harmed after their gun fight, which neither ever had the real intention of hitting one another with any of those bullets in the first place). her entire witch's labyrinth is one where everyone is happy and gets the lives they desire. why would her labyrinth, which is meant to reflect in-part her inner feelings and desires, appear that way if she didn't truly want that for everyone?

rebellion is so compelling to me for all of this and so much more!! (I could write a whole other post on the way it presents it's freedom with danger vs control with safety question at the end of the film) she is a girl who has repeatedly suffered incredibly traumatizing events and longs for a world where the person she loves and the friends she considers dear are safe. homura is not really the devil, but she wants to appear to be because being the devil would be easier than being a human being in these circumstances.

#I “joke” that i'm a homura apologist but like for real I am LOL #homura's actions aren't holy and good #but I don't believe they are evil either and that's kind of the point #anyway can you tell i've watched this movie like 10+ times #madoka magica #homura akemi #madoka magica rebellion #walpurgisnacht rising #homu #letters from rokkenjima

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wondermilka · 11 months

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Tragedy Of A God

Pairing : Zhongli x gn! reader

Synopsis : Zhongli sacrifices you for the sake of his nation.

Warning : angst , no comfort , death implied

" My nation is very dear to me "

" Dearer than I? "

" Yes. "

With your remaining strength, you desperately extended your bloodied hand towards the man before you.

His gaze lacking of warmth, his face displaying an unyielding expression as he held your fading body.

The icy pierce in his eyes is enough to shatter your heart into countless fragments.

Zhongli, the man you had loved with all your heart, had made the unimaginable choice. He had chosen his nation over you, over your love.

With each labored breath, he managed to whisper, "My nation is very dear to me." His grip on you tightened.

Your voice laced with regret as you replied, "Dearer than I?"

The pain in his eyes matched the ache in your voice as he mustered the strength to reply, "I'm afraid dearer than you."

Tears cascaded down your cheeks, mingling with the blood that stained your trembling hands.

"I love you," you choked out, the words weighted with both heartbreak and understanding. "But I cannot bear witness to this. To the sacrifice you're willing to make."

Zhongli's grip loosened slightly, his face etched with a mixture of anguish and resolve. "Please understand, my love," he pleaded. "The burden I bear is not one I choose, but one that destiny has placed upon me."

Knowing that his duty demanded the ultimate sacrifice shattered the illusion of a future you had once envisioned together. In that moment, love and sorrow waged a battle within you, tearing at the fabric of your soul.

With the last vestiges of strength fading away, you reached up to gently cup Zhongli's face, tracing the lines etched by the weight of his responsibility.

"I understand" you whispered, your voice barely audible.

Zhongli's eyes, filled with anguish, locked with yours. "I never wanted to hurt you," he murmured, his voice heavy with regret.

"I know," you replied, your voice filled with a mix of sadness and acceptance. "But you have made your choice, Zhongli. And I have made mine."

With your final breath, you whispered words you hoped would find solace in his wounded heart. "May your sacrifices bring prosperity and peace to Liyue. Farewell, my love."

As your life slipped away, the weight of your sacrifice settled heavily upon Zhongli's chest. He cradled your lifeless body in his arms, the enormity of his decision consuming him. The cold winds that swept through the desolate landscape echoed the void left by your absence, leaving behind a somber reminder of the price paid for the sake of a nation.

#angst #genshin #genshin angst #genshin impact #genshin impact angst #zhongli #zhongli angst #zhongli x reader #zhongli x reader angst #zhongli x you #zhongli x you angst

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gojos-fr-bae · 7 months

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Liar pt.1

GIF by bakemono04

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

Pairing: Gojo x fem!eader

Warnings: Pregnancy, blood, mass k1lling, heavy themes kinda, angst, not proofred

Word Count: 1.9k

A/N: Finally done😭 This took so much energy and honestly I'm still deciding how I feel about it. Hope you like it tho.

You looked up from your bed, buried in your blankets as you watched your husband hurriedly get dressed in his sorcerer uniform, buttoning his jacket and rushing to reach for his phone before realizing that you were awake.

He looked deep into your eyes, his being covered by his signature blindfold, and although you couldn’t see them, you could tell that they held a chaotic medley of heavy emotions.

He slowly leaned closer to you, placing his right hand against your cheek and pressing his forehead against yours.

“Where are you going?” your feeble voice whispered.

“I have to work,”

“Do you have to go now?”

“Don’t worry honey, I’ll be back before you know it,” His heart ached as he lied to you. He knew his words weren’t true, but he had no choice.

“Promise?”

“Ofcourse, baby, I’m-”

“The strongest, yeah yeah, I know,” You croaked, feeling sleep begin to take over you once again.

Satoru chuckled softly as you slowly began to drift back into your dreams. His left hand slowly rubbed your swollen tummy.

“Keep our little Kikufuku safe until I get back, okay? He said softly, placing a kiss above your belly and then your forehead.

As you hummed in agreement, he slowly moved away from you and walked towards the bedroom door. Every fiber of his being was telling him to stop. To turn back and stay with you. But alas, he had a role to play, and he was needed elsewhere, and there was nothing he could do about that.

As he closed the door behind him, he dragged his body away from you, from your child, and to his students and fellow sorcerers. He begrudgingly trudged himself towards the Shibuya station.

He didn’t want to go but he had no choice, no matter what he wanted, he had to go…

He HAD to go.

Week One

You stirred from your restless slumber, shivers running down your spine from the cold latching to your skin. You groaned at the aches and pains that have been plaguing you for the majority of the latter half of your pregnancy.

As you were still waking, you heard your doorbell ring. You slowly pushed yourself off the bed and lugged yourself down the stairs.

As you opened the door, you were met with a somber looking Ichiji. He could barely meet your eyes as he whispered an apology, bowing his head and holding a letter out to you.

“What’s this,” you asked, heart racing because you knew exactly what it was but you didn’t want to accept the glaring truth.

“It’s from G-Gojo Sensei,” He feebly whispers, voice cracking slightly.

Your shaky hand reaches out to grasp the letter, thanking Ijichi before closing the door. You made your way to your couch and went against every fiber of your being to open and read the letter.

Dear Y/N

Hello my love. If you're reading this it means something has happened to me.

I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my promise. I know you deserved better and my biggest regret is not being able to give you a life you deserved.

I don’t know how long I’m going to be gone, and as much as it would pain me to let you go, I can’t bear the thought of you having to deal with all the burdens that come with being with me.

If you choose to leave, I fully understand and don’t blame anyone other than myself.

Please take care of our kikufuku, I know you will be the best mother in the world.

Always know that I love you more than life itself, I always have and always will. Please never forget that.

-Satoru

Your hand covered your mouth as a sob was ripped through from your lungs. Tears flowed nonstop from your eyes as you cried and cried and cried.

You clutched your belly as you tried to stop crying for the sake of your baby. All you could think about is how you were going to raise the baby alone and you only ended up crying even more. But you decided to be strong. You had to for your little mochi.

Month One

You squeezed your mother’s hand as you pushed through the most excruciating pain you may ever experience. The nurses were trying to coach you through your breathing as you went through labour.

“One more push,” your doctor instructed you, causing you to put all your energy into birthing your precious angel.

Suddenly, the room was silent except for the crying erupting from the newborn.

“Congratulations, he's a beautiful, healthy boy!” the nurse whispered, placing your son on your chest.

Tears blurred your vision as your precious angel on your chest, your mother hugging you and at that moment, all you could think about is how much you loved and would lay your life down for the happiness of your little prince.

“As he slowly opened his eyes, you were mesmerised by the sea of blue that met your eyes, matching his white hair.

“Hello Kaito,” you said with a happy but simultaneously sad smile as you gazed down at yours and Satoru’s child.

Like father, like son.

Month 2

Satoru

Gojo layed silently, eyes bare and staring into the seemingly unending void of the prison he has been submitted to, and all his mind would drift to his thoughts of you and his presumably unborn child.

In the prison, no time would pass, and considering you were 8 months pregnant when he was praying to every being willing to listen to him that you wouldn’t give birth to your child without him by your side. He wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if you had to go through that and handle the Jujutsu higher ups without him.

Although he was surrounded by darkness, his mind was racing because on top of all of this, he was trying to understand why he had seen his best friend’s being in the station, but that wasn’t his priority. That was getting back to you and his baby, but from the looks of it, it wasn’t going to happen any time soon

Y/N

Ever since you had given birth to your little prince, you had been constantly harassed by your husband’s parents as well as all the upperclassmen of the Jujutsu world. You hadn’t even been able to leave your house for the past week because It was surrounded by men trying to take your son away from you.

You had always known that bearing the son of the strongest sorcerer in the world would come with its consequences but you and Satoru had always agreed that you would be able to face these things together. However, ever since his sealing two months ago you have been under constant pressure and harassment from the Jujutsu world telling you to give up your son, but you would rather take them all to the grave with your bare hands than even think of giving up your son to them.

All of this had been building up even before your little mochi’s birth and it had reached a point where you don’t think you can handle this anymore. Although you were also a sorcerer, and a special grade at that, you wouldn’t be able to protect your baby from the dangers and toxicity and dangers of the Jujutsu world. You had to leave.

You wanted to raise your son in a place where he could be safe and grow happy and healthy. And although you didn’t want to leave your job and your students at Jujutsu Tech, you had to do what you had to do for the sake of your child. Even if that meant abandoning your marriage with Satoru.

Your heart ached as you looked back at Japan from the airport, baby in hand and family and friends bidding you farewell before you slowly made your way to the boarding gate. Tears filled your eyes as you thought about your now technically ex husband. You looked down at your now bare left ring finger, thinking of the future you could have had together, but you had to do it. Not just for yourself, but for your son as well.

You had to leave.

Month 3

It had been a month since you had left Japan and although it had been extremely difficult to settle in a new country with new cultures, a different language, and different people whom you know none of. Finding a new home and job to be able to provide for your son, but it was beginning to feel worth it by the end of the month you had finally begun to feel comfortable.

However, as you looked over your son, clutching his blue and white monkey plushie, your mind couldn’t help but drift off to Satoru.

Was he back?

Was he still sealed?

Would you ever see him again?

Although you knew he would never find you where you are, what if you met him one day. You had kept in touch with megumi throughout the move considering to you, he was always going to be your son. But other than him and your parents, you never really spoke to anyone back home, and you decided that you need to look forward and focus on bettering yourself and making sure you give your baby a happy home. And you weren’t going to turn back, at least not anytime soon.

Satoru

Gojo Satoru is free.

He had finally been released from the prison realm and before he could do anything, he went on a rampage, killing every curse and curse user within a 20 km radius, painting the city in all of their blood.

He finally stopped seeing red and immediately thought back to you. He warped back into your shared home, hoping to find you asleep and wrapped in the warm duvets on your shared bed.

His heart began to race as he warped into a dark, empty and cold home.

“Y/N!” He called, running through the house searching for you before reaching your presumably shared bedroom.

As he burst through the door, his eyes met your bedside clock. Three months. He had been gone for three whole months. Panic began to seep into his bones.

This means you must have already given birth. Were you okay? What if you didn’t even survive labour?

He quickly rummaged through the drawers, moving to the vanity, and his heart sank as laid atop the table were a picture of you in a hospital holding a bundle of blankets covering your precious child. The life you created together. As he held it with shaking hands, tears cascading onto it, his gaze shifted from the image to a letter, and to his regret, your engagement ring.

In the letter, you told him about the harassment you and your son had to endure, turns out you had a boy, and how you had to flee the country for both of your safety.

His heart shattered and he hated himself more than he ever had anyone else.

“No, no, no, no, no, no no” He whispered, hand gripping your ring so tightly its gems began to cut into his palms.

He was overrun by countless emotions. Guilt, grief, regret, self hate, anger, all of them.

Sobs Ripped through his chests so violently that it ripped his throat, causing it to bleed. His knees gave in and he clutched the ring and picture to his chest and he cried. And as he cried, something inside him died. His happiness, joy, his smile, all left him at once, and his eyes lost their shine.

That night, Satoru passed away, and left behind Gojo, an empty shell of what he once used to be. What he could’ve been.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

I tried. Longest imagine I've ever done, I'm so tired. lemme know if ya'll want a pt.2

@porridgesblog , @giannitaa , @c0pkiller

#gojo satoru #gojo #jujutsu gojo #gojo x reader #gojo saturo #gojo x you #gojou satoru x reader #jjk gojo #gojo imagine #gojo fluff #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojo angst #gojou satoru x you #satoru gojo x reader #suguru #jujustu kaisen #geto suguru

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taylortruther · 3 months

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I actually agree with you 100% on all long-term relationship breakups being pretty much the same. When you've loved someone for so long, it means they're also part of your routines, part of your comfort, part of your home and part of your family. Their family becomes your family, their friends become your friends, their hopes and aspirations become things you care about as well as their struggles. The reasons why the rs starts falling apart aren't as simple as one or both parties no longer "being in love", but rather a combination of issues: career ambitions intolerable to the relationship for various reasons, incompatibility of personalities or of extended families, growth at different paces, the goals and wishes agreed at the start of the rs changing with time, loss of trust and connection, etc. I thought of this the other day when an anon mentioned the movie Blue Valentine, and I think the reason why that film feels so realistic (and devastating) is because all long term relationships slowly desintegrate in similar manners to what happens to the couple in the movie. And piggybacking off the discourse we had on The Alcott, it's quite desperating and frustrating to slowly realize that things that once were profoundly sacred have come to feel like a curse; you no longer feel like you're choosing everyday to be with this person out of love, but rather that you're emprisioned to them.

What we know about TTPD department so far makes me think this will be explored but not in the way many fans seem to be expecting (not you guys lol but I have seen ppl that expect the songs to be sassy, petty, and accusatory). Instead, I think we will see her show and deconstruct all the ways she fought for it to work, compromising, committing, twisting herself into a pretzel, and making herself smaller, not because he was "forcing her" like some fans think but rather from her own decision bc that's just how much she loved him. Which is even more devasting if you think of it: she locked herself away, tried to dim her shine, beared emotional burdens alone because of her own conviction and desire to make things work, not as a result of him "making her" do all of that. So imo one of the reasons this album will be particularly devastating is bc we will learn in a very raw manner just how much she loved this man and how much she was willing to give up for him, and how much regret she probably has about things she did for him that at the time felt like a no-brainer but in hindsight seem ridiculous (which is a very common thing for everyone bc that's simply what you do when you love someone; love isn't usually rational). And this will undoubtedly be very relatable for ppl who have been in ltrs that ended bc, as you say, most of them end in the same way and most of us realize how much we actually sacrificed for it only after the fact.

i agree!!! also, we know taylor never does anything by halves. we know love is basically a religion of drug to her. we know she felt that he believed in her and loved her for her at a time when she felt she was distinctly unlovable. we know she fought hard to deal with her baggage. we know she was reflecting on fame, how fickle it is, and why she wanted it so badly (miss americana doc, mirrorball, midnight rain, to name a few.) we can look at midnights to see the things that were haunting her and they were things like: dealing with fame, choosing the hard way, reckoning with loss of self, wanting to protect love that felt fragile, blocking out noise, the empowerment and loneliness of relying on oneself. midnights feels like a very honest and logical progression past folkmore, which discussed those topics as well as infidelity, taking up space, confronting depression and pain and other sticky human desires. ttpd feels like it will further touch on these complicated and sticky and dark topics, with the added "bonus" of the specter of a breakup, and the breakup itself, haunting them. anyone whose ever lost a part of themselves to try and save a relationship of any kind will understand, i think. love is a beast that way.

#a black dog you might even say #predictions #ttpd

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drarrily-we-row-along · 3 months

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Harry was a lot.

And if he was being honest, he felt like he'd always been a lot. Like the burden of his company came with far too many complications, far too many challenges for his friends and loved ones to bear. His emotions were big, his sense of duty and justice were big, his opinions of the world were big.

His body and its desires (or lack thereof) were a lot. The way he loved, obsessively, immensely, deeply, every atom of his soul devoted to reshaping itself to fit that of his beloved, was a lot (too much, always too much, and still not enough).

He was just a lot. Loving him, he reasoned, must be a fairly difficult task (it was difficult for him, so surely it would be difficult for someone else).

This dilemma tumbled around in his head as he fried some eggs and potatoes, avoiding the garlic since it did something funny to Draco's stomach. Wondering how he could possibly make himself into something less, or perhaps, if he was unable to do that, how he could give Draco enough in return for his love. Was there a way to repay someone who loved him enough to give up sex, to listen to the endless ramblings in his head, to sit and cuddle with him on the couch even when Harry's most innocent of touches caused a wave of arousal that he then ignored? How-

"Morning, love," Draco murmured, wrapping his arms around Harry's waist and leaning against him.

He swallowed around the thoughts crowding into his throat, marbles rolling around in his mouth. "Hey," he rasped, light and cheerful as he could.

Draco moved so that he was at his side, arms still around him, "what's that?" he asked softly, thumb trailing over his side.

"What?" Harry asked as he flipped the potatoes.

A finger traced the frown at the corner of Harry's mouth, brushed over the line between his eyebrows, "What's going on in that marvelous head of yours?"

"Breakfast is ready," he said in lieu of answering the question that he wasn't even sure where to begin with.

Draco caught him as he started to turn toward the cupboard for a couple of plates, "Wait," he said, throwing a stasis charm over their eggs. "Tell me?" he asked softly, eyes warm and soft, curious and just a little afraid.

And Harry couldn't stand that look, couldn't bear the thought that Draco might be wondering if it was something he'd done that had upset Harry's delicate balance inside his head. "It's just," he bit his lower lip and looked down at where Draco's hands had caught his. "I'm a lot. Asking you to live with me, to share a life with me, it doesn't feel fair to you."

He chanced a glance up at Draco only to find him staring back with that particular look of affection that made Harry want to curl up into a ball because it was too much and he wanted that affection too badly. “Darling,” Draco started.

“No,” he said, shaking his head and barely resisting the impulse to cover his ears.

“Harry,” he said, a soft huff of a laugh escaping with the sound of his name. “Light of my life,” he continued, moving closer to Harry again and wrapping his arms around his waist once more, firm chest pressed solidly against Harry’s back. “My love,” he continued.

Harry squirmed, letting out a plaintive groan.

“I love you so much,” he pressed a soft kiss to Harry’s neck and Harry couldn’t help the way his head tipped to the side of its own accord to give Draco room. “You are my most favorite human being in the entire world.” He squeezed Harry’s stomach a little tighter, “better yet, the entire universe. Getting to live with you makes me impossibly happy.”

“But-”

“No buts,” Draco replied. “I choose you, Harry. I choose this life. I want this life. And nothing you can say about it will make me change my mind.”

Harry sighed and let his body relax against Draco’s, the sweetest defeat he’d ever accepted.

“That’s more like it,” he said, holding Harry tighter. “Just love me and let me love you. What else could we possibly want?”

And when he put it like that, Harry supposed there wasn’t really anything else he could ever want.

———————

Read more of my fics if you’d like :)

#drarry #love #soft #fluff #ace harry #short and sweet #reassurance

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chronicdisasterwrites · 10 months

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these morons of jujutsu high

pairing: gojo satoru, geto suguru, shoko ieiri and fem!reader

genre + warnings: - this is NOT a poly fic. they’re all just vvv good friends. nanami and haibara were mentioned. mentions of blood, death and general jujutsu kaisen TW stuff. smoking, the word “goddamned” is mentioned. gojo being an idiot lmfao.

overall FLUFF !!

word count: 1219

authors note: so this is just a cute, heartfelt piece about the jjk troublemakers including and reader. i was thinking of making this the intro of a potential series but ✨ let’s see ✨

enjoyyyy <3

Is this really my life?

A question that always lingers in your mind.

Being a jujutsu sorcerer was no walk in the park. Death was a regular occurrence in your line of work. Deaths you anticipated, deaths you caused, deaths of friends, and even deaths of curses. None of them are ever easy to deal with. Nothing about this goddamned job is easy.

The smell of blood is as common to you as the smell of antiseptics is to a doctor. The sound of a curse evaporating into nothingness is ingrained in your brain as the sound of a child's first laughter is ingrained in the minds of their parents. Your hands are used to the touch of the cold steel of your weapons as a guitarist is used to the wood of their guitar.

This is your life. Your weapons are your instruments and the world is your stage. The only difference is, you have the blood of the crowd on your hands every. single. day. The blood of curses, the blood of humans, the blood of your comrades, and the blood of your own body.

How could it be that this life; so full of hurt, pain, despair, regret, fear, loneliness, anxiety, and depression, can also have so much happiness, love, excitement, companionship, adventure, humor, and serenity? That’s life, you suppose. But how can a life like yours have so much love alongside such hatred?

Your friends are the reason, you suppose.

These morons of Jujutsu High.

They feel the same emotions as deeply as you do. They have all felt loss, betrayal, grief, and death as much as you have.

Gojo Satoru had basically been raised as a trophy or a high-value product kept in perfect condition for the world to gawk at with wide eyes and ulterior motives. With the weight of the responsibility of being ‘Strongest’ hanging over his shoulders and daggers and spears pointed at him from every direction, he never had the chance to be a mere child. Which is what he was. Just a child. From birth to the present day, he has had eyes on him with the neon sign labeled ‘Strongest Sorcerer Ever’ blinking over his head. Always on his guard, being wary of who to trust. Not a moment to be a child. Not a moment to be a teenager and certainly not a moment to be an independent adult, free to choose who to love or what to do in life. He only has one thing to do. One obligation he has had since birth. Be the strongest. Throughout the heavens and the earth, he alone is the honored one.

It's a pretty lonely role for one person to bear.

Geto Suguru has kind eyes, a simple smile, and an extremely feared cursed technique; but what that smile and easygoing personality covers is his heart burdened with the horrors he has had to face in his life. He too, was born with the responsibility of using his cursed technique to help people. Born with the ability to absorb curses and later use them as he so desires. Living every day just killing and absorbing something that tastes like a rag covered in vomit and shit. Having to force your oesophagus to open up and force your mind to think of something more delicious whilst absorbing the thing you killed a few minutes ago is all second nature to Geto Suguru. Doesn’t mean it ever gets easier. But the smile comes easily to him and his voice stays soft and stable as his words soothe even those who hate him.

Because Geto Suguru wants to help those who are weak, and he would swallow all the curses necessary in order to do so.

Shoko Ieiri is the epitome of genius. Since she was a child she knew fully how to use the reversed curse technique; the ability to heal oneself and others, a technique even the strongest and most experienced jujutsu sorcerers have trouble mastering. Being so valuable means she has to stay in a lot, or go to missions alone a lot. She doesn’t get to choose missions, doesn’t get to accompany her friends to even ‘potentially’ dangerous locations. Being so valuable, she is the first person every jujutsu sorcerer goes to for healing and rejuvenation. Which also means she has to see a lot of her comrades lie on the steel bed, lifeless and cold and limp. She is the one who has to patch them up and she is the one who has to cut them open. Dealing with death and the aftermath is her job.

That's a lot of death for two eyes to see and two hands to explore.

Meeting them, knowing them, and growing to love them is the most rewarding experience your roller coaster of a life has had to offer by far. Checking out every single cafe Japan has to offer, milking Satoru of all his wealth by going out to eat and Satoru eating the most (ironically), pissing off Yaga-Sensei, celebrating birthdays, arguing and then making up with actions instead of verbal apologies, being the loudest group in every train station, smoke breaks with Shoko and Suguru while hiding away from Satoru, spending sleepless nights under the stars with Satoru, teasing Nanami and Haibara for acting like a 50-year-old married couple, fighting curses and always having each other’s backs. This was your family. However dysfunctional and however small.

So now, sitting in the classroom watching Suguru and Satoru bicker about who knows what this time, with Shoko sitting next to you fiddling around with Satoru’s sunglasses making faces and terrible impressions, bathed in the golden rays flooding the room through the windows as the sun goes down, you ponder the question; is this really your life?

You hear your name being called and the train of thought comes to a halt, as you look up to find honey-gold eyes staring back at you.

“What’re you thinking about so hard?” Suguru asks with his soft eyes and an even softer smile.

“She’s obviously thinking about how right I am and how wrong you are, Suguru,” Satoru interjects with his usual cocky smile and teasing lilt to his voice.

“Yeah, she definitely thinks a seal can beat a hippo in a fight to the death,” Shoko quips with unimpressed eyes and an obviously sarcastic smile.

Satoru slaps his hand on the desk so loudly that the sound reverberates throughout the entire floor you’re on, “HAH! Thank you Shoko, exactly what I’m saying. Of course I’m right.”

He wears an accomplished smile as the sarcasm completely flies over his stupid head.

“Gojo… I was joking. You’re obviously wrong.”

You can almost hear something crack in his head. The sound of disappointment.

“HEY just think about it okay? So a seal-“

As a new chapter of bickering begins between Shoko and Satoru, Suguru nudges your shoulder with a quirk of his eyebrows, silently repeating his previous question.

You look at him, look back at Satoru and Shoko and shake your head with a content smile and a huff of laughter, “Just thinking about life, I guess.”

With a hum and a smile Suguru relaxes on your other side as you both turn your attention to the ongoing argument unravelling before you.

Yeah. This really is my life.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x reader #gojo x reader #geto x reader #shoko x reader #jjk fluff #gojo satoru #geto suguru #shoko ieiri #gojo uses sarcasm but fails to understand it when someone uses it on him #shoko is babygirl #geto is babie boy #nanami and haibara are a certified married couple #yaga wants to die #i love them your honor #jjk x y/n #gojo satoru x reader #geto suguru x reader #shoko ieiri x reader

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calentvre · 3 months

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that one person in the replies of the black sails vs ofmd poll arguing against black sails being "an actual queer show" is being deliberately obtuse and a troll but i can't sleep so. sure. i'll say why dismissing black sails like that is intellectually dishonest

defining how black sails is a "queer show" or how queerness is written into its core is i think explained best by the other things that black sails is about. queerness is but one among the show's most important themes, that all overlap and intersect each other

on the societal level: hierarchies of power and influence - hinging on wealth, status, gender, reputation, et cetera. transatlantic empires - colonization, slavery.

on the personal level: identity, image - the performances we put on for others, safety, independence, dependence on other people. the narrative of a life. how human life resists narrative payoff. becoming, then bearing the burden of what you've become.

in general: stories - the power they and the act of telling both hold. the truth and its importance; its irrelevance. reasons. consequences. inevitability.

black sails is about all these things and it connects the threads between them with precision, narrative grace and emotional payoff. it is a tragedy about disenfranchised characters that are navigating their wants and needs in the face of various expectations, crafted with historical plausibility in mind.

if it's somehow still unclear how queerness ties into the show's themes... it is insulting and frankly absurd to denigrate the queerness of the show with arguments dismissing flint's struggle just because there wasn't on-screen sex between men. flint not being straight is only the backbone of the plot! and reducing wlw relationships that span the entirety of the show's four seasons into "male gaze fodder" or whatever is an incredibly disingenuous take that not only glosses over how multifaceted and integral their characters are but also reveals the bad faith nature of these arguments. the first season featured a lot of sex and violence, sure, to lure in a mainstream (GoT era) audience, but the mere existence of a wlw relationship alone? what about anne and max building their trust and love, balancing against duty and image caters to the straight man, exactly?

yeah, black sails does not really play for representation points - instead, it has real things to say: about fighting against a rigid society that would rather get rid of you. about choosing either idealism or pragmatism in the face of oppressive forces. about escaping your identity or holding onto it and the violence and freedom concealed in each choice.

#black sails #text #discoursing as a little treat to myself<3

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bartxnhood · 9 months

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lost stars | c.b

colby brock x reader

summary: colby is always there for you. even at your worst.

warnings: mentions of depression, anxiety, thoughts of suicide, etc.

a/n: i’ve been kinda in a slump lately so this is kinda a self insert, but also if any of my followers or you come across this i genuinely hope you know that it will get better. if you need someone to talk to me, please reach out to me. i’ll always be here for you. ❤️

requests open

not proofread

✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵

you were overcome with a familiar sensation. the sensation of having everyone around you but still feeling alone in the world occurred often. the need to curl up under your covers and wither away, the pain in your chest, the random tears, the feeling that you're going crazy. everything was wrong, but you were unable to express your feelings.

you surrounded yourself with toxic people over the years, hungry for any type of attention, even if it was unpleasant. you desired to feel something. even if that meant it hurt you more, it was better than nothing. you weren't numb.

you tried to block out your thoughts with music, but the songs only served to highlight how unhappy you were. your life was uninteresting, and you feared you'd never feel genuine happiness again. until you met colby, you saw everything in black and white.

he was a colorful person who saw the good in the world while you only saw the terrible. it has been said that opposites attract. despite this, you two had a lot in common after the meeting.

first and foremost, both of you had excellent musical tastes. if one of you discovered a new song or band, you'd tell each other about it. alternatively, if colby was droning on about the paranormal and his love for hunting the unknown, you'd be all ears, staring at him with the brightest smile, seeing how his eyes lit up. colby often enjoyed movie marathons with you; you'd both choose a few films you hadn't seen before and watch them together, along with the occasional old favorite you both adored.

“oh cmon, there was totally enough room for jack!” you exclaimed with the remote in hand. you just finished watching titanic for probably the hundredth time with him and you were back to arguing about the ending. “i’m not saying there wasn’t, jus sayin it would’ve been hard to balance!” he laughed, standing up from your sofa with the popcorn bowl in hand. “okay yeah maybe, but that’s why she had the life jacket!” you heard him snicker from the kitchen, “y/n, the movie is twenty years old, i don’t think it’ll change anytime soon. sorry darling” he walked back into the living room falling by your side.

though, it wasn’t always glamorous. you knew colby was famous, you know girls practically threw themselves at him and it did make you uneasy.

not that you thought you weren’t good enough for him, but the fear that once you had another episode, he would leave you.

colby understood about your mental health; he was always there for you and would do whatever to help you the best he could. you never wanted him to see you at your lowest; it was a difficult period for you, and you didn't want colby to bear that burden.

you were going through that again. everything went back to black and white, and the color faded day by day. you began to lose that sparkle in your eyes, you stopped smiling at his texts, you slept most of the day, you didn't leave your bed, and you even forgot to eat some days. your body was once again being overwhelmed by that sensation.

colby began to notice your absence, your one-word texts back, or even not messaging back for hours. it was like a complete shift. he was aware of what was going on and did not hold it against you. you needed time to deal with everything, but he didn't want you alone. he didn't have much experience with what you were feeling, but he would spend every single day with you just to understand; he wants to help you. he doesn't want you to suffer any longer, and even if you didn't talk to him or tell him how you felt, he wanted you to know he was there for you no matter what.

you lay on your bed, a mountain of sheets covering your body. all of your lights were turned out, and the only light came from your window. you couldn't recall when you last showered, maybe four days ago if you had to guess.

when you tried to close your eyes, you felt that familiar aching in your chest again. you began to cry as memories flooded your head. it was annoying not to be able to sleep without your mind taking control. reminding yourself of all you could have done better or things that have contributed to your depression. you felt guilty for everything, even if it had nothing to do with you.

you rolled over, facing your window and door. It was almost midnight. you just wanted to sleep, but following your previous naps, you doubted you'd get any. you tried to close your eyes and rest, but were interrupted by a knock at the door. "y/n?" you heard your boyfriend's voice and opened the door, only to be met with darkness. you opened your eyes and looked at him. "colby?"

he entered, closing the door behind him. "you vanished, and I just wanted to check on you." he left his spare key on your desk. "im okay," he knew you weren't, so he moved over to your side and perched on the edge of the bed. "you sure?" he asks, reaching for your hand. "i know you're having a hard time; whether you let me in or not is up to you." "but I hate seeing you suffer like this, y/n," he implored, his thumb sliding over your knuckles. meanwhile, you chewed on the inside of your cheek as you stared at the wall, fighting back the surge of emotions. "I just," you began, exhaling the breath you felt you'd been holding.

“I'm not sure, colbs. "I just don't know," you hesitated, "I always end up like this again." I can't express how I feel. "I've spent so much time suffering that it's normal," you explained, a few tears falling from your eyes. I don't want to put you down because you deserve so much more."

colby rose, had you scoot over, and took your place on the bed. he drew you closer, allowing you to cry with your head on his chest. "please don't say that." knowing how depressed you were shattered his heart. "i want to be there for you no matter how many times you go through this. “its a part of you that i still adore. you closed your eyes, fighting back tears as he smiled sadly.

"youll get through this, and I'll be right here until you do. you don't have to be alone anymore."

#colby brock imagine #colby brock #colby brock fic #colby brock x reader #colby brock angst #colby brock x you #colby brock fluff #colby brock x y/n #colby brock fanfic #sam golbach #sam and colby

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shadowqnights · 2 months

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crazy how everything about mcd is so much more insane when you apply what i call the dog rule and that is when they are all dogs now in some way shape or form: an analysis.

when garroth is purebred, a hound made to serve, that does not know how to do anything but heel. he has purpose. he is sleek and well-groomed because he has to be, because he has always been tended to. a dog that falls into desperate spiral when that dynamic shifts - because who is he, without someone to follow, protect, love? a dog that becomes flea-bitten and hungry when he runs because he was never taught to take care of himself, to be his own master. he falls apart. he needs this, he knows, but what is he without someone to own him? a dog that cannot lead any kind of pack or family because it is afraid to understand the kind of animal it is if not in submission. if a parent, a teacher, he is promptly punished by his students as cruel reminder that he is not allowed to find joy in anything other than what his makers intended. a dog so desperate that it offers up its own leash to whoever will take it when things crumble - even if it means turning back to distasteful company. as long as it is held at all. time and time again, he tried to tend to the younger, weaker. he tried to feed them and lick their wounds - and time and time again, only to be mauled in turn. no more, he thinks. life was simpler when he was mindless, just four paws and a purpose. if that was what he was bred for, what business does he have pretending?

when laurance is a stray but made out of love. his coat shines thanks to the love of his family, his sister. he is sleek and well-groomed with them. the nether breaks him in, turns him a little wild. gives him cause to show teeth when threatened. when he bites, he mauls. there is something wicked in his animal eyes. he goes for the kill. when he bites, something in him wants it to hurt - whether his prey or himself, he can't tell. a part of the dog believes the suffering is natural because its maker declared it so. the pain wanes in and out like the cycle of the moon; life is unpredictable. he is braced to survive, sometimes with teeth already bared to expect the suffering. constantly on edge, pacing, waiting for the next disaster. a loyal, desperate pet that will follow to the ends of the earth - a desperation that borders on obsession. he will eat you alive, if only you would stay with him, inside of him, never leave him. never look at anyone else the way you would him. don't put him on a leash - let him choose who to lope after. his leash, in fact, is in tatters. he can't be collared. he merely follows, hungry at the heels of who fed him. his sense of duty is not of obligation but of love, a sacred need to stay at the side of those who treated him with kindness and them alone. and worse, he is burdened with the constant fear that if left untethered for too long, that obsession might turn carnal - that if wronged, he may not kill to eat and feel full, but kill merely to feel the blood on his teeth, just to feel the pain. feel something. anything. that he might enjoy the taste of his loved ones. maybe a leash is the right thing. maybe he needs to be caged. he can't bear either thought.

when they both bite the hand that fed them. when they bite each other. when they are dogs and kind of made for each other.

dante is a dog. aaron is a dog. aph is a dog. katelyn? oh you fucking guessed it. ivy. jeffory. zane. yeah. all of them are dogs. welcome to the dog rule fuckers its exactly how it sounds. are you sick of the word dog yet.

#i feel very passionately about my dog rule. i like dog metaphors. sue me #mcd #minecraft diaries #aphmau #garrance #garroth ro'meave #laurance zvahl #if god may grant me a brand. let my passion for dog talk in mcd be it #i have like rambled on for HOURS to oomf about the mcd dogs i am also really into aaron dante dog duo #and the aaron-aph wolf dynamic could be REALLYYY interesting.#but thats like a whole can of worms that is mostly gaping open no one has asked me to spill yet is all #every thing comes back to garrance.#AND THIS IS JUST LIKE A CLIFFNOTES VERSION OF MY THOUGHTS I HAVENT GOTTEN INTO THE HALF OF IT #also if you see the hints of me and oomfs vampire au no you do NOT

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nbspacegay · 1 year

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sitting here feverishly thinking about knights and their lords "I cannot order you to do this" and "I have to order you to do this" two sides of the same coin just like 'no I can't ask you to risk your life for me or die in this way' and the knight choosing to do it anyways vs 'we have to do something your moral code does not permit and we both know it has to be done but you will never forgive yourself and so I will order you to do it in the selfish hope that someday you night forgive me' they're the same!! they're the same!!! it all means I love you just ahh!! 'I am asking you to do it I am asking you to bear this burden hoping that my asking is enough, that you will do it for me because I asked'

#knights #tropes #writers on tumblr #me

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nanomooselet · 1 month

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Wolfwood and Martyrdom

There's something everyone tends to misunderstand, about martyrdom.

You don't become a martyr against your will. It has to be a conscious choice between renouncing your faith and keeping your life, or remaining faithful and being put to death. It's not just dying, even if it’s in service of faith. It has to be a decision.

It has to be a willing sacrifice. You have to, consciously, purposefully, choose surrendering your life over renouncing your faith.

I do not think people are realising just how profound Wolfwood's devotion to Vash had become. How truly he believed in Vash. How deeply they loved and were devoted to each other.

Because Wolfwood truly did not want to die. And yet he chose to in Vash's name.

Wolfwood loved Vash and his ideals so much that they became his reason to live, and then he accepted death to uphold them. Vash would never have asked that of him. Vash apologised for judging Wolfwood for killing when his willingness to do so saved innocent lives, told Wolfwood his ideals were a burden Wolfwood wasn't required to bear.

Instead, his death was something Wolfwood had to request.

Do you accept this offering?

And Vash had to give him permission.

I do.

His proposal accepted, Wolfwood took up everything he had left, his body and spirit, the life he could have had, the welcome home he always yearned for - and he purposefully set them aside in the name of Vash's ideals. He was obedient unto death.

It's so painful. Vash is devastated, openly howling and weeping in anguish. But he had to let it to happen because it was Wolfwood's choice. That's why when he prays it's not answered. And it's why Wolfwood tells him, with his final words, to smile - because he has no regrets. He chose this. He chose Vash. Don't blame yourself, tongari. You look better when you smile.

It is absolutely a wedding. There's literally no other way for the whole series of events to be properly understood otherwise. The passion and devotion of Wolfwood's sacrifice leaves me standing back in genuine awe.

Because to live outside of Christ is to die, and to die in Christ is to live.

Wolfwood entered the story as a dead man, and then realised he wanted to live. Vash wanted to share all his tomorrows with Wolfwood - and he will. Because martyrdom?

Can be how you become a saint.

And this is why Vash burned through his power to protect Wolfwood's body. Because Knives may consume everything else in his madness and fear and vengeance, but he doesn't get to even come close to touching this. This is sacred. This is a holy relic. This is something that belongs only to Vash.

A sinner like Knives is unworthy.

#trigun maximum #trigun spoilers #trigun meta #nicholas d. wolfwood #an intercessor specifically #like. this about recognition of exceptional holiness and closeness to God #vashwood #it's perfect #like i ain't even mad #The Couch Did Nothing Wrong

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