#i honestly hope he gets a happy ending somewhat
Note
Omg I love your stories so much especially the cod ones 😍😍😍 could you please write a ghost x reader oneshot where the reader maybe gets shot taking a bullet meant for him and maybe they are in an established relationship please with a happy ending
Ignoring Orders & Accepting Lead
A/N: I loved this req. and I hope you're okay with the direction I took this in. I'm trying to get the other asks I've been sent finished in a somewhat timely manner... haha! Honestly, I never thought anyone would enjoy my writing as much as all of you have. <3
Summary: Established relationships mean occasional arguments... You and Ghost have one before a mission. And the make-up conversation is a little less than standard for most couples.
T/W: Canonical Violence, guns, knives, Blood, Death (non-major characters), severe injuries, tension, hurt/comfort, HAPPY ENDING, Ghost being a bit overprotective, Reader being a smartass, not proofread.
Arguments with Ghost happened a lot more frequently than anyone would ever suspect. While he liked to stay quiet when the opportunity arose, it was also know that if you could avoid a conflict, you would just to make sure the temperature of the situation didn’t rise too high. As a pair, it made you great operators, just for the skill-set you each had as well as the predisposition to get things done quickly, and quietly. As for being in a relationship, your character’s held zero influence on the way that you cared about each other of how that would display itself during moments of tension or disagreement. Especially in moments during missions where things weren’t going to plan, and your ideas severely countered Ghost’s.
One of those fights had occurred right before you’d been dropped into a very small town outside of Culiacán, Sinaloa. At HQ, Price was splitting everyone up for their distinct purposes, and you’d been immediately assigned with Ghost for an infil job. One requiring both of you to get in and get out of the well-known cartel stronghold without getting caught or being killed. Naturally you accepted the task without so much as flinching, whereas Ghost didn’t have such an easygoing attitude about it.
He was fucking furious.
First he tried threatening Price, demanding that you not be listed for that and go with Soap for the much less risky job of tracking down a small-time dealer who’d been listed as having information valuable to the task force. Price wasn’t stupid enough to not recognize where Ghost’s rage was coming from, and just simply said that if you wanted the job, there was nothing he could do about it since you’d already read the briefing and knew the entire plan just as well as anyone else. It wasn’t what he wanted to hear from the Captain, and that made things all the worse for you when you said you weren’t going to let him go in alone.
One of the worst fights you’d ever had with Ghost since your partnership became a fully-fledged romance happened right off the helipad being fueled-up for your departure. God it was miserable, and it hurt every ounce of you to have to defend yourself over the one thing that you were certain you could do. Your job. Understanding Ghost’s protective instinct was one thing, but there had to be a line drawn where him throwing his weight and rank around to limit your exposure to risk couldn’t be done anymore.
He’d been totally insensitive to your side of the story, and was obstinate that if you got on the helo, he’d not do a damn thing to keep you safe once you got to Culiacán. Merely to prove the bullshit point that you couldn’t to the job without him. That statement alone had you strapping into your flight harness quicker than Ghost could utter ‘jesus christ’ under his breath. Totally stonewalling you for the entire flight and practically acting like you didn’t even exist. Hell, he wouldn’t even go over the mission plan as was typical, leaving you fully to fend for yourself and follow his lead without even a hand signal to lead you through it.
Everything on entry went smoothly.
No guards were stationed in the underground sewer tunneling, leaving you very dry and unhindered on the half-mile walk from your drop-point to the access ladder leading up into the basement of a massive chapel-turned-base of operations. Whether or not you’d been keeping up or not didn’t appear to phase Ghost in the slightest, and he continued on and up into the basements without so much as glancing your way. You were quickly losing your patience, and getting than much more hurt with hoe easily he could turn off the affection and care that he always had for you. Sure, he wasn’t the coddling type, but you’d never wanted that from him; but this was a whole different level of coldness.
Inside the basement there were stockpiles of cocaine, pre-packed on shipping crates with a printed docket of everything contained on each. Just seeing that much shit all in one room made your head spin. It was one thing knowing it existed, and understanding that tons of it were being shipped all over the world, but actually being in a room surrounded by it from almost floor-to-ceiling was quite overwhelming. And Ghost’s own utterance of the sheer volume confirmed that it wasn’t just your own imagination leading you to think this was way too fucking much to handle. Bad part was, you couldn’t touch any of the shit or destroy it, and were solely on the objective of cloning their hard drives and bringing them back for examination.
Clearing stairwell after stairwell, and only needing to dispose of two guards -quick work with a sharp knife- you’d been able to access their massive data stores collected in what appeared to be nothing more than a personal server farm. Kept extremely cold for the benefit of the rows of towers, you’d been given the small cloning chip needed to transmit data back to HQ. But you needed a window of up to fifteen minutes to ensure everything was fully copied. You -and Ghost- both knew that fifteen minutes was far too long to just stand around with your thumbs up your asses and just hope that no one wondered why the two guards you’d shanked hadn’t checked in, or come to make a round inside the server room.
Ghost very instinctively covered the access door to the room, not even bothering to demand you give him the chip or take care of the data itself. A small reminder that he wasn’t totally untrusting of your skills, but still not large enough of a show that made you feel any less miserable about how your relationship was quite strained at the moment, all of something as small as a fifteen minute window of gathering information. By some miracle, you watched the progress on a small tablet linked to the chip and HQ’s data stores, watching it hit one-hundred percent in just under eight minutes. Perfect. It couldn’t go much smoother than that.
You were tapping Ghost on the shoulder, and giving a small thumbs-up just as the sounds of footsteps running up the stairwell outside began echoing. More than just one or two. It was actually a lot more than you even had the ammunition to handle, considering the job was deemed covert. Neither you or Ghost went without some protection… but you’d been packed out a lot lighter than normal. Right away he was stepping back from the door and checking his watch with a stern look in his eyes. One you recognized as realization that you’d have to fight your way out of this. Ugly, bloody, and violent.
Exactly what he didn’t want in the fuckin’ first place.
Ghost was inside of his own mind, trying to balance out the fear of you being in the middle of a cartel fire-fight and the rage he still felt when you just wouldn’t fucking listen to him right from the beginning. He knew what cartels did to women, and a pretty one like you wouldn’t have the mercy of just being killed. No. They’d fucking torture and toy with you until there wasn’t anything human left inside of you. That’s why he’d been so goddamn adamant that you stay behind for this one.
The data you’d copied over was bullshit compared to you living and breathing for another day. And Ghost couldn’t stand to think he’d walked you right into this place without at least trying to show you that he cared enough to see you live. Dying wasn’t a fear of his, but there was nothing he dreaded more than the mental image of you bleeding out in his arms all because of his own fucking mistakes.
Yet, here he stood. Having to make the decision on what to do or how to get you both out of here alive if he could even manage that in the first place. Part of him was already preparing to let them take him and give you enough time to slip away. You were fast enough. Small, so they’d have a far harder time picking you out in a crowd. But if he’s assumptions were correct, the tunnels would still be clear.
He gave you one last look, and grabbed hold of your vest to pull you behind him; Hearing the footsteps of more than six men filling into the large room outside of the server farm. Some barking orders to check down the hall, while others were meant to stay posted at the stairs to block off anyone flushed out. Ghost felt his own body starting to get cold. So desensitized to the violence he was already prepping himself to commit that if it wasn’t for you being there, he’d had already burst through the door and met them head on.
“Fuckin’. Listen,” He snapped as quietly as possible. Your ears perked up, happy to have just heard him speak, even if he sounded downright vicious. Your little hand tapping at his ribs as confirmation you were paying attention sent a shiver up his back.
“Don’t engage unless they’re right in your way. Take the tunnels out, I’ll be right behind you.” He barked out the orders under his breath.
Ghost couldn’t help but feel your hand fist into the material of his shirt. You didn’t like that one bit, and he didn’t need to see your face to know better. Because for whatever reason, you had it in your thick little head that he needed protecting as much as you did. Like it was your job to make sure he didn’t get hurt. Cute and a little bit amusing, Ghost hadn’t the slightest clue where you got the idea from or why it was such a massive trigger for him to challenge it. But right now, there was no fighting about it. He’d not take no for an answer, and when you didn’t give a confirmation right away, he growled in impatience.
Reluctantly, you gave it with a small tap rubbing your thumb over his hip bone.
One minute, Ghost was pushing open the door and spotting only three men within direct threat distance and seeing only one man standing at the top of the stairs. A split second of decision had him throwing two knives, and charging at the third to ensure that you’d only have to take care of the one remaining. He sunk a third knife in, feeling the man sink to his knees and drop to the floor, retrieving two of his blades before turning around right as the sound of a pistol registered. Ghost realized his fatal error in the squeeze of a trigger too late.
Only you saw what was coming, and Ghost watched you crumple to the floor between the shooter and himself; Stopping the man from shooting him in the back, but catching you somewhere of your front that residual splatter from the rained over his mask and tac vest. Everything around Ghost slowed, nearing an entire halt to the earth as you fell limply to the ground. Not even moving to try and cover your wound or catch yourself from the fall to the marble floor. Nightmares couldn’t compare to the sight of you crumpled in a heap of gear and bulky material after watching you purposefully allow your life to be traded for his.
The shooter wasn’t lucky enough to squeeze the trigger again for the knife that embedded itself in his forehead. Retribution. Quick but not as instantaneous as it would’ve been with a gun of his own. He was forced to see his own death approach with the snapped rotation of a throwing knife Ghost had sharpened days ago. He wanted to it last longer… make the bastard pay for it. Torture him for as long as his body could take, then give him just enough time to recover and start all over again.
But you needed him… Fuck. He needed you.
On the ground, you knew you’d taken a shot. But the adrenaline and immediate blow of it had you frozen on the floor. You couldn’t really tell where you’d been shot, or how bad the damage was. Truthfully you’d never experience it, and while many of the stories you heard over the years of your service, nothing they ever did to explain it was touching the utter fire radiating through your body. What you did know was that you were bleeding, and the shot had missed your tac vest; A small stream of blood was rolling through the grout lines in the floor, staining the white marble a sickening color.
Seeing Ghost on a knee in front of you, eyes wide and searching over your face was the next hazy image you recognized. His mask was shifting with the motion of him talking, but your ears were ringing. A pitchy and high whine blocked any other sound, even Ghost’s voice which you’d always been so very keen on paying close attention to. You felt awful. Putting him through this after you’d literally just had the fight about you getting hurt. Guilt flooded your limited emotional capacity, and as Ghost readjusted to pick you up, you felt tears rolling down your face.
You’d not had a single second to react to the fourth man in the room, him having the jump on visualizing Ghost facing the other three. It made him a vulnerable target. And in the split second you had to do something, you’d jumped in the way. Laying out totally flat to use your entire body to shield his. Hoping to god luck was on your side. At this point, hanging over Ghost’s shoulder limply as he rushed down the stairs on his way towards the basement, you weren’t sure if luck was on your side or not.
Thankfully, your hearing was slowly coming back in certain frequencies.
Sounds of gunfire and sirens blaring from the street level let you know that everyone within a few miles of the cathedral would be on the lookout for intruders. With all of the people who’d seen you, killed, no descriptions could be sent out or blared to citizens under control of the cartel. It didn’t help that Ghost was the largest man in the city who just happened to have on a skull mask and carrying a woman leaving behind noticeable drips of blood as a gruesome kind of trail to follow.
“C’mon baby, answer me!” Ghost panting yell finally registered, and you were able to manage a weak pat on his lower back. You felt his hand squeeze the back of your thigh for a moment before his pace slowed from a quick run to almost a crawl.
“We got company…”
There hadn’t been any men in the tunnel. But now that Ghost was less than fifty yards from their extraction point with a “medical” heli waiting for their return; three men were posted at the gated slope leading up to the hillside entry. The Lieutenant could feel your blood soaking into his shirt, wetting his shoulder. A bad reminder that you needed to get the fuck out of here right now. But he couldn’t get rid of those fuckers unless he put you down.
He squeezed at your thigh again to get your attention.
“I need - need to -fuck- set you down…” Saying those words utterly destroyed Ghost. You were the only thing he cared about right now, but the longer he put this off, the risk of you dying loomed closer.
“Need ya t’stay right here… okay? Don’t come out…”
Carefully you felt him settle you behind a large sewage drain pipe connecting from the street into the small walkway. Easing your back against the curved brick wall and once again taking a very hard look at you. This time, he could see where the bullet had just missed the edge of your tac vest, entering through the ripped hole in your shirt just below your collarbone. Every hopeful fiber in Ghost wanted to believe it wouldn’t be non-lethal. But if it shattered your collarbone, the bullet fractured and clipped a vein or small artery, there was plenty to be concerned about.
He would’ve packed the would just to stave off the blood flow. But he didn’t have the luxury of time. And whether or not Ghost would ever admit it to himself, repeatedly shoving his finger into your wound would render him down to a shell of a man. He couldn’t hurt you. Fuck, he couldn’t hurt you.
“Stay here… I’ll be right back.” He whispered against your forehead, pressing his masked mouth to your forehead.
You leaned into him, hearing his words and consciously noticing just how difficult it was to understand the words after hearing them. Almost like you couldn’t natively speak english and the meanings just weren’t instinctual anymore. God it took everything to comprehend that he was planning to clear the rest of the way, leaving you here. Eyes trailing after him sluggishly, you fought with your own arms to try and scoot back just a little further to peek between the large pipe you were leaning against to see if you could spot Ghost or the targets.
Being told to stay was always a difficult order for you. Even if you weren’t shot and struggling to manage simple bodily functions. Surprisingly, you were able to see the shadowed figured standing guard right at the gates you’d come through, holding rifles and totally unaware of Ghost lurking within such easy range. You wondered why he didn’t just shoot them, and get this over with.
Why he needed stealth when the entire city was looking for you didn’t make a lot of sense in your mind. Until you saw five more men walk down to join the others. With one cut of your eyes to look at Ghost, you realized he had anticipated more and planned of making quick work. It’d been a long time since you watched him work alone. Nearly two years. Attempting to shift your shoulder it rocked your entire system. Biting your jaw to keep from making noise, you tried focusing through the tears in your eyes as the only man who held the key to not only your life, but your heart in his fist.
Ghost kept reevaluating his odds with each step closer. Feeling distracted in the worst way with the guilt of leaving you unprotected, and in no position to defend yourself in the case that he wasn’t able to take all of these men alone. Those odds -either realistic or narcissistic confidence- didn’t phase the Lieutenant in the slightest. He was fueled with rage. And while these bastards hadn’t done anything, just being in his path was a death sentence.
The fight started smoothy and efficiently, taking out the largest of the men and using his half-dead form as enough of a shield to eliminate the threat of three 12.7x99mm wielders, too surprised to shoot off five rounds. Another three surrounded him with nothing more than machetes swiping through the air with near misses. One smooth draw of his own pistol dropped two men, and when Ghost turned around to face the third the butt of a shotgun smacked across his vision, dropping him to his knees and hearing his pistol slide across the floor out of reach.
He hauled himself to a knee, watching the man throw the empty shotgun away and approach with a knife, glinting in the sunlight just on the outside of the tunnel. Ghost could actually hear the rotor blades of the helicopter cranking up, set into motion by the small tracker in his belt giving the pilot a comm-less tip off. He’d have to fight this hand-to-hand, and while he didn’t feel the least bit tired, Ghost knew a long fight only risked you further. And fuck if making you wait didn’t make his hair stand up on edge. Even in your state, he knew better than to think you wouldn’t start getting worried in the next couple of minutes.
His opponent took the first blow and used the hilt of his large blade to connect fully with Ghost’s jaw. A heavy crack sounded, but the Lieutenant merely flinched; Throwing his own weight on the weight-matched man, and there ensued a grappling match that risked deadly knife wounds being grazed against straining forearms and a battle of wills that totally opposed one another on every basis… Save for being the last man standing. For the second time in a single mission, Ghost found himself at the razor’s edge of a knife pressing against his throat and no really foolproof tactic of getting out of it.
“Seré el que te mate, fantasma..” The man breathed hotly against Ghost’s ear, jerking the knife closer and fighting the sheer strength in the Lieutenant’s arm. “Colgaré tu cabeza en mi pared, bastardo.”
Ghost fumbled with his other hand under the pressure on his throat began taking away the normal dexterity he functioned with; Trying to find a knife on his belt, or any kind of weapon at this point. Only all of them had been embedded in the dead bodies scattered around them. It had been a bad decision to listen to Price when he said to pack lightly. It would be the end of him.
Simon Riley didn’t show himself often during missions. Always locked away in the recesses of Ghost’s mind, quietly biding his time until there was the few-and-far-between moment for him to appear for a few moments. Typically in the darkness of your shared bedroom with your face pressed between his shoulder blades and your little arm wrapped around his waist.
Simon loved feeling your hand against his belly, twitching your fingers in your sleep and reminding him just how soft and loving you were; Happy to hold his hand tightly in the middle of unconsciousness just like you did when awake. Ghost did everything he could to protect Simon from anyone and anything that could hurt the other half of himself. But hearing another pistol register loudly in the tunnel, echoing back and forth for almost a whole minute; Ghost found himself losing control to Simon.
He felt the man above him slump in dead weight against his back. Muscles slack and the knife held to his throat clanged to the concrete. Looking in the direction of the shot, whatever protective grasp Ghost had on himself utterly dissolved. You’d managed to lay yourself out on the floor, hardly propped up on one elbow with your smoking pistol shaking in your hands. Tears spilled over your cheeks and with each second that passed, he could visualize the pain you felt from such a rough kickback in how you abruptly dropped the pistol in front of you and collapsed flat on the floor with a low groan.
He couldn’t have moved to your side faster.
Immediately picking you up again and making the very short but tense run back to the heli; all the while the pilot was looking between his instruments and the sight of Ghost holding you close to his chest in the floor.
“No one… threatens… to kill you… but me…” You mutter pained, bearing a muddled smile up at Ghost.
Unbelievable… Ghost hardened his stare, putting pressure to your wound and watching in quiet grief that he needed to cause you pain.
“Good shot… did good baby…,” He whispered back weakly, burying his face in your neck and squeezing you against him. Desperate to get you home and safe.
“Gonna ignore how you refused to follow a superior’s orders three times…” He added stiffly, feeling you twitch when a spasm in your shoulder seized. You just bit out another pained noise, coughing a bit with the dust being kicked up from the helicopter lifting off.
The look you gave him couldn’t be seen as anything other than pure, innocent, and unflinching devotion. It nearly ripped Ghost out of the body you clung to, leaving Simon bracing you against his chest as the pilot at the front started giving information to the rest of the squad about fifty miles away at a safe house. Much too long for the Lieutenant’s liking. But close enough that he could get you to his squad and they could ensure you didn’t leave him.
He couldn’t stand losing you, and they’d make sure you didn’t.
“Simon,” Sweet and weak, your hand cups his cheek as you bring him out of an initial trigger. “M’not leaving you anytime soon. Love you too much.” Your eyes close as your head leans agains him trustingly.
His chest crumbled in on itself. “Love you too, baby… I love you too.”
Reblogs & Comments are Appreciated! <3
#simon ghost riley#ghost x reader#cod#cod mwii#simon riley x reader#simon ghost x reader#velvetures writes#velvetures#hurt/comfort#angst with a happy ending
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Kissing is... Neteyam XF!Omaticaya Reader
Warnings: just much fluff
Note: ok this gets shorter and shorter and honestly i dont know why but i owed them a happy ending and really i wasn't very inspired but after talking to my special person he gave me some ideas, hope you enjoy it and thanks for the support i have recently received
-Owed you girl @jjyourcake
WORDS: 499
The first time you kissed Neteyam it was soft. You could say that he was shy. At first their lips just brushed against each other quickly, but after a few seconds, immersed in the sounds of the forest around them, you felt your lips slowly open with the brush of his tongue, welcoming him, both of them just feeling good, like never before.
With the passage of time it became somewhat hot. Sometimes, perhaps more often than either of them would admit, they would slip away into the night, taking a long walk through the high branches of the trees, discreet enough that no one could hear or see them, until they came to a small lagoon at the foot of the river. They both jumped, stirring up the water a bit and when they surfaced for air, Neteyam would take you by the hips and wrap your legs around his, after looking into each other's eyes desire would wrap them both and between kisses he would rip you off. Little breathy sounds as you felt his sharp teeth bite into your bottom lip, you could be sure the night wouldn't end there.
It would turn desperate as his teeth tugged at each other's lips, your fingers entwined in his hair and clenched into a fist when you felt full in every way, as Neteyan licked carelessly at your mouth and they just couldn't get enough.
But other times, like that for example, in the celebration after their engagement, the kisses were tender, in front of the large Sully family, Neteyam had asked for her parents' blessing to become your partner, the only one for the rest of his life, as if you had not been for so long ago. The warm fire at dinner surrounded them while his brothers shared stories of little Nete with you to embarrass him in front of you. When you sometimes glanced at him, you would see his adoring gaze on you as his parents spoke a few words to him in private, and later that night, when the stars rose brighter than ever over their heads, he kissed you with barely any pressure visible on the lips, traveling the corner of your mouth to the center and then to the all of your face gently kissing the bright freckles on your cheeks and pecking everywhere, showing you how much he adored you in front of everyone, because that's what did you deserve
And a couple of years later, when he was named Olo'eyktan of the town, and while the fruit of their love was barely visible on your slightly swollen belly, Neteyam took your hand and gently squeezed it, seeking the sensation of your completeness support in his new duty, you subtly returned the gesture as they stood together in front of the whole town, his town. They had already survived many things apart, there was no doubt, in either of them, that they would survive much more like this, together.
#neteyam#avatar the way of water#avatar#avatar 2#fanfic#neteyam x reader#fluff#jeke sully#lo'ak#kiri#neytiri#tuktirey#the way of water#female reader#god dam im in love#why this man is so cute
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Off Day
ʚ pairing: Kate Martin x Roommate!reader
ʚ word count: 2.6k words
ʚ warnings: RPF!! angst, creepy!stalker-ish!classmate, harassment, some fluff at the end
ʚ ri speaks: okay so i literally just dropped part one and the masterlist and right after i literally wrote this part! i literally pulled this series out of my ass last night…pardon my french. so i finished the masterlist and first part last night and so far, the feedback im getting is really good so…yay!☺️ anyways, this part is a little dark? but trustttt it will be resolved soon.
Part 2
| Series Masterlist |
You desperately wanted to crawl back into bed, get back under the cool covers, and just lie there until the world ended. Or until Kate got home. Either way, you wanted to be anywhere but class.
Something about today was so off. You woke up and did your routine like any normal day. Kate left earlier than you but came back right before you left. You left her breakfast or lunch, whatever she decided to classify it as on the counter, and said you'd see her later at practice. That was 3 hours ago.
But today you had an exam in your anatomy class. This class was easy but you just did not want to be there because of Nick. Ever since a couple of days ago when you told Kate what went down between him and Gabbie, he's been relentless in getting the details of "your and Kate's relationship." You didn't want to tell him it wasn't Kate because you'd rather have to pretend to date her than anyone in California. Especially the girls you knew.
Something about Nick was off so you weren't going to pick a random girl in your following on Instagram. Knowing him, he'd probably stalk the poor woman. You just wanted to skip this class altogether. You hoped this line in the coffee shop on campus would move faster to possibly find a seat where other people could fill in around you before he could.
"Hey!" You turned your head, pulled one airpod out of your ear, and smiled at the brunette next to you. Her name was Juliana and you had class with her in like ten minutes.
"Oh, my god, hi!" You put the AirPod back in its case, abandoning the tranquility for the rest of whatever conversation was going to ensue.
"Not to be nosy or get in your business, and I really don't want to make you uncomfortable, but that guy over there keeps staring at you." She pointed her finger, subtly, in the direction behind her. You got to be fucken kidding…Nick. "He's been saying things to people in anatomy, saying you guys are talking, and how he doesn't like how you're too close to Kate. Or something like that, it's all unclear. But I found it weird and thought you should know." Her face looked genuinely concerned. Her eyes went soft as she looked at your expression change from friendly to somewhat terrified.
"Oh, my god. Thanks for telling me. I don't even know him. He's asked me out a couple of times but I rejected him. Who is he telling? Do a lot of people know?" You asked her. Your hands started to get clammy, as you started to move to the pick-up counter, your name being called; your drink ready.
"I honestly have no idea, but if anyone asks just tell them you're in a relationship." Juliana suggested, unsure of how to handle the whole situation.
"Yeah, I thought he'd leave me alone when my friend Gabbie had said I was seeing someone already. He automatically assumed it was my best friend Kate." You really thought this was behind you. This was probably the bad feeling you've been feeling all day.
"Oh, so you're not dating Kate?" Juliana asked, her face lightening up.
"No, but she said she was okay with going along with it to keep him away from me. Why? You like her?" You had no idea she swung that way. She usually talked about boy drama whenever you guys did group work in your class.
"Uh, no. But if she decides to start seeing someone and needs to drop the whole "fake girlfriend" thing, you can definitely ask me. I'm happy to help." She smiled warmly at you. You were very grateful for her willingness to help.
"Oh, okay. Thank you so much!" Her friend then called her over, and you both said goodbye. You had already made it to your class. Juliana keeping you company the whole way. You walked in and took a seat, pulling out your phone. You figured you could text Kate and let her know that if Juliana was willing to help, you'd relieve her of her duties. You also wanted to catch her up on what the hell went down in the coffee shop.
"you will not believe what just happened..."
almost instantly, her response bubble popped up.
"omg, what?"
"a friend in my anatomy class came up to me in better buzz and told me some guy was staring at me"
"what guy? are you okay?"
"and the guy was Nick!"
"oh..."
"apparently he's telling people me and him are talking but doesn't like how me and you are so close"
"wtf. are you serious?"
"did you tell her that me and u were together?"
"ab that...she said she would be down to be my "girlfriend" if I needed it. so I was thinking I would just tell ppl that me n her are together, so that way you're not dragged into this mess lol"
"Oh."
"okay for sure."
"I gtg. I'll see you later at practice!"
"alright, see you later. love you!"
" 'bear <3 loved "alright, see you later. love you!" "
Usually, she said it back. You, Kate, and all the girls got in the habit of saying 'love you' to one another because it was true. You all loved each other so dearly. None of you had shame in how you felt about one another and how close you held each other to your hearts. But you just decided to brush it off, she was probably just super busy.
You honestly had no idea why your mind told you to read into everything she's been saying and texting you, lately. I was seriously getting unhealthy with how much you worried about what she thought about you. You were lost in thought before someone took a seat next to you. Assuming it was Juliana because she was just outside with her friends, you turned to tell her that if she was down to be your "girlfriend." You were pretty startled to see it wasn't her but Nick instead.
"So, how have you been?" He asked. Something about him seemingly so off. You didn't like the feeling you got around him at all. You noticed his gaze following you out of the shop with Juliana ten minutes ago. You looked around the room, the spots in the class filling up quickly. You saw Juliana walk in, but before you could get her attention, Nick moved into your line of sight and prevented anyone from coming between you two.
"Uh, good?" You looked down at your phone trying to find anything to keep you looking as uninterested as possible.
"That's it? Nothing else to say to me?" He seemed to be growing more irritable with the short responses.
"I don't know what you want me to say, I didn't want to talk to you anyway." You looked at him, wishing he'd go away. You didn't want to say it out loud and catch the attention of everyone around you.
"Oh, now that's not nice. That's no way to talk to your boyfriend." He said, a weird smile encroaching on his lips. You did not like this at all. You were genuinely starting to get scared. You pulled up Juliana's number, thankful you asked for it last week so you could send her the notes she missed.
"911. he's starting to really freak me out."
You sent the message and immediately Nick asked who you had been texting. "Can you please, for the love of god, leave me alone? I'm seeing someone." The smirk on his face dropped, a cold stare being directed right at you.
"No, you're not. You're seeing me."
"No, she's not you creep. She's my girlfriend." Juliana then sat on the opposite side of you, staring Nick down. Nick's face flushed, his eyes looking at a few people who had turned around to see what was going on. She placed a hand on your leg.
It wasn't long after your exam and when the class was dismissed that Nick approached you again. He tried to talk to you, you just want to get straight to the Carver stadium. No students that weren't on the team or staff weren't allowed in. You just needed to get there as quickly as possible.
"Hey! Stop ignoring me." Nick semi-shouted at you. You had put both airpods in, trying to tune him out. It wasn't until he tried to grab your arm and pull you back from walking away from him that you turned around ready to blow up before your saving grace came up to both of you.
"Hey, man! Watch the fuck out. I don't know who you think you are but you are not gonna put your hands on my friend like that. Not like that, not now, and not ever." Hannah, with the hand she had placed on his arm to throw it off you, pushed him back a little before putting her arm around your shoulder and walking away from him. "That was fucking weird. You know that guy?" She looked back to see if he was still there, and indeed he was. Watching you both walk in the direction towards the arena.
"No, actually. He's a fucking creep who asked me out a couple of times and took it horribly. He's been harassing me for a little. He was staring at me while I was getting coffee before my class like two hours ago." You said, calming down significantly since Hannah showed up. But your stomach was still uneasy and you really did not want to go to that class tomorrow or ever until he was gone and far away from Iowa City.
"Yeah, don't walk around campus alone anymore. I'll come to find you after every—what class is this?"
"Anatomy."
"Okay, after every one of your anatomy classes, I'll come to find you and we can go to practice together. Do you have friends that know what classes you have and can walk you?" Now that you think about it, Juliana was in a lot of your classes. She wanted to do nursing so most classes you had in the week, were with her.
"Yeah, funny story. The girl that's pretending to be my girlfriend to keep that guy away, which he obviously doesn't give a damn about, is in a lot of my classes. And it works out because the ones she's not in, Kate takes me because they're on her way." You smiled at the tall girl, grateful.
"Okay, good. I don't want you getting stalked and possibly worse because of that guy. You should report him before it gets too bad." Hannah suggested, and rightfully so.
"Yeah, I will. Thanks again, Hannah."
The girls' practice was going well. Until it wasn't.
"Hey, you got a minute?" You were organizing gauze and wraps in the med bag behind the bench before you looked up and saw Kate holding her nose.
"Yes, of course, Kate. Another one?" You looked at the girl as she walked around the bench and you handed her a towel. She broke her nose every year, you and Caitlin swore on it. You grabbed some gauze squares and put them in each nostril, to absorb as much blood as possible before you completely ruined the towel.
"Don't tilt your head back. It could cause clots." You knew she already knew that with how prone Kate was to bloody noses. But it never hurts to refresh her mind, as it is instinct to stop the bleeding.
"Yeah, thanks." You and Kate stood there while the bleeding stopped. "Alright, I think I'm good." She said a small smile on her face. You saw some blood on her shirt, grabbing the small bottle of peroxide in the bag, and a small gauze pad, you tried to soak as much of it out so it was easier for her when she did laundry. Suddenly your phone started buzzing. A new notification every second.
"Jeez, who is blowing up your phone?" Kate asked, as she looked at your screen lighting up and watching the notifications pop up one by one.
"I don't know. Can you check?" You asked as you tried to get the last spot of blood off her clothes.
"It's Instagram. Someone named Nick? Is it that same Nick guy Hannah said harassed the fuck out of you today?" She set your phone down. Your stomach immediately churning. You were honestly getting the creeps.
"Oh my god. She told you?" You asked as you looked into Kate's eyes. Both of yours mirroring each other. The same worried look.
"Yeah, and I'm glad she did. You need to say something. Or I can if you're not comfortable." Kate suggested. Now six more new notifications popped up, all from Nick. "I'll block him for you." She said, picking up your phone but stopping to look at you. Her eyes silently asking if that was okay with you.
"Yeah, please." You sighed as you threw the gauze squares away, putting the peroxide back before watching Kate block Nick. On your main and spam account. You have no idea how he found you; your name isn’t in the usernames. You really should go private and change your message settings. "Alright lemme check your nose though, to make sure it's not broken." There was absolutely no need to do this. You knew it was probably just a simple elbow or ball to the face. You both would've known if it was broken.
"Alright." She sat on the bench, signature manspread. Good lord. You stood between her legs, putting pressure on different parts of her nose, checking for any indication of pain. It was a little tender but that was obvious, and so was you making an excuse to keep Kate a little longer. I mean, could she blame you? You haven't seen her much in the last couple of days. Late practices you missed for studying for your exam, her leaving earlier than you and by the time you get home she's either asleep or visiting her nephew. You missed your best friend.
You could see her looking at you as you checked. Your eyes meet once or twice, small giggles escaping your lips every time. Her eyes dropping to your lips occasionally, watching your tongue poke out a little as you focused on the task at hand. That made her giggle too. "Okay, bear. You're good." You kissed the top of her head and patted her shoulder before she stood up and ran back to the court.
"If I roll my ankle, do I get a cute nickname and a kiss too?" Caitlin shouted as she pretended to throw herself on the ground. You laughed at her antics loudly before nodding your head and yelling yes. You laughed harder as she pretended to limp towards you.
"Yeah, I'm gonna need like ten kisses to make this unbearable pain go away." She fakes winced as she took a seat in the spot Kate was previously in, resting her "injured" foot on the chairs next to her.
"Oh for sure, Cait." You laughed.
Suddenly, Sydney, Kylie, Jada, and Gabbie, hobbled over pretending to be injured to get their kisses too. "You need one too, Coach Bluder?" You shouted after you made your way through half the lineup. You made the assistant coaches laugh, including Coach herself. The practice was better after that, but you just couldn't shake the events from today off.
Maybe another movie night with Kate would fix this. A lot of ice cream must be eaten tonight. Just one night, peaceful, and Nick free.
#kate martin#kate martin x reader#kate martin fanfic#iowa wbb x reader#iowa hawkeyes x reader#iowa hawkeyes#iowawbb x reader#caitlin clark iowa#caitlin clark#hannah stuelke#gabbie marshall#jada gyamfi#sydney affolter#kate martin is so cutie#god i love kate martin#kate martin is indeed my gf#i love kate martin#she is my wife#real#sapphic wlw#wlw fanfic#wlw blog#wlw#rimunagenius writes !#and they were roommates#series
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It's your birthday - 141, Los Vaqueros + König
A/N: Since it's my birthday today, thought I'd indulge myself so hope you guys enjoy :))
Summary: It's your birthday and the guys find out.
Simon "Ghost" Riley
Depends on if he's close to you or not.
Mans has the emotional range of a sock, so realistically the most you'd probably get out of him is a gruff "Happy Birthday."
And that's only if he somewhat likes you - if he doesn't then he'd probably just say "You're getting old now, cunt." *Affectionately? Who knows.*
If you were part of the Team, he'd probably take the piss out of you for it.
Would definitely be the one who would tell the waiters that it was your birthday - even if it wasn't - just to embarrass you.
Nonetheless, despite all his teasing, you came back to your room that night to find a little gift on top of your bed spread; there was no name on it, but scrawled across the tag said "Happy Birthday, (Y/N)."
It was a hunting knife with your initials carved into the base of the handle.
You never questioned it but whenever he saw you use it, a small glint briefly sparkled in his eyes.
Johnny "Soap" MacTavish
He's lowkey annoyed that you never told him when your birthday was.
Would absolutely rope you and some of the Team into going out clubbing - Ghost refused but ended up turning up anyways; "Wanted to watch you make arses of yourselves."
I can just imagine him going to the bar and coming back with a tray of shots - the people who carry and sell the shots in clubs know to carry extra because he buys them all each time.
Would honestly have spent most, if not all, of his money if it hadn't been for Price being the voice of reason.
Would also be the type that would be telling anyone and everyone that it was your birthday so you guys could get free shots.
Orders you whatever food you want on the way back home aswell - kebab? Got it. Pizza? Done. Whatever you want, he'll stumble into the shop and get it.
Your birthday would be absolutely chaotic but it would be one to remember.
Captain John Price
He knew it was your birthday, he's seen your file - the fact that you hadn't mentioned it to anyone meant that you probably had a reason not to, so he didn't say anything.
Would probably wish you a casual 'happy birthday' on a passing, in his normal formal tone.
When Soap invites all the team out on your behalf for clubbing, he's reluctant to go - claims he's "too old for that shit."
But ends up going anyways, purely because he knows that when Soap gets drunk he's a bit of a liability and can easily spend way more than he should (and honestly, same).
Would buy you a drink - whatever you wanted, alcoholic or not.
And maybe, just maybe, if he's had a bit to drink and or is in a good mood, he'd let you wear his hat. Just this once.
But then Soap tried to put it on and said he was keeping it...
So he took the hat back like >:(
Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
He also knew when your birthday was - it came up in a conversation ages ago, and he has a great memory.
Also gets roped into your birthday night out by Soap.
He'd probably get just as drunk as Johnny but he'd be taking photos and posting onto his Snapchat Story, basically vlogging the whole night.
I can also see him surprising you with a cupcake, placing a birthday candle in it with a sheepish smile.
Would also buy you drinks but unlike Soap, he wouldn't be killing his bank account - self-control and all that.
Would get the DJ to play a birthday song for you - not the traditional cheesy one, but either 'It's My Birthday' by Will.I.Am or maybe 'Birthday' by Anne-Marie.
Alejandro Vargas
"Ah, feliz cumple!" *idk if this is correct, using this article for reference*
Like Soap, he wants to go all out for your birthday - if both teams were together at the time, it'd be one big chaotic night out.
He's a big flirt, regardless of what age you are he's complimenting you nonstop.
If he and Rudy get roped into the Night Out by Soap, Rudy and Price end up having to the be the voices of reason - Soap, Gaz, and Alejandro keep ordering shots; they managed to convince you into doing that challenge of getting a drink of everything from one end of the bar to the other.
Needless to say, you're all legless by the end of the night - well, Alejandro's still vertical but his alcohol tolerance is insane.
Would definitely want to spoil you - takes you shopping and tells you to pick anything that you want, don't worry about the price.
Honestly this is making me think of what Sugar Daddy! Alejandro would be like and it's giving me ideas...
Rudy Parra
This sweet guy would absolutely go out and get you a cake, maybe a balloon, and a card.
How did he know it was your birthday? He's a good listener, you'd been talking about your life outside of the military and had flippantly mentioned when your birthday was, which he noted.
Like Alejandro, he would honestly spoil you rotten.
If you both weren't deployed, he'd plan a trip away somewhere, surprising you with the tickets.
If he gets roped into going out by Alejandro - who was roped in by Soap's enthusiasm - he's practically glued to your side for most of the night.
Takes a bunch of candid pictures of you - they're honestly really good, he should be a photographer.
He'd probably have to stop Alejandro from feeding you and the others stronger shots - the jump from sambuca to jagerbombs to tequila was not a good idea.
He'd listen to your drunk ramblings with a smile on his face, letting you feed him your pizza.
He always remembers your birthday and makes each year memorable.
König
Finds out it's your birthday when your Superiors wish you a brief 'Happy Birthday' during training.
Straight away, he feels so guilty for not knowing but you reassured him that you hadn't really told anyone so he needn't worry.
Nonetheless, he'd still try and make the most of the rest of your birthday.
He'd cook for you - a traditional meal that his Mother taught him, and she used to make it for him on his birthday.
He'd run you a bath, give you a massage, and pamper you - he'd dote on you even more than usual, if that's even possible.
If you wanted to go out and do something, he'd do it - even with his social anxiety, he wants to see you happy so he'd bite the bullet and go for it.
If you wanted to stay in for a chill night and watch a movie, he's game for that too - lets you choose whatever film you want to watch, gets all your favourite snacks and gets all the fluffy blankets and pillows he can find to make a comfy spot on the couch.
He'd also secretly set a reminder on his phone for next year, so he never forgets.
He's honestly just so sweet.
#simon riley#soap mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#captain john price#john price#alejandro vargas#rudy parra#konig#simon riley x reader#soap mactavish x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#captain john price x reader#captain price x reader#alejandro vargas x reader#rudy parra x reader#konig x reader#cod#call of duty#multifandomimagin3s
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Clockwork
University AU - angst with a happy ending, best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers
Pairing: Jung Wooyoung x Female Reader (ft. Yeonjun of TXT x Reader)
Synopsis: Being best friends with Jung Wooyoung was everything you could imagine. That is, until you catch feelings for him. Now, you navigate a heartbreak minus the rejection, and Wooyoung doesn’t seem to like it.
WC: 8.7k
Content/Warnings: mentions of scars, subtle hints of disassociation in the beginning, mentions of spiraling, one harassment scene. less serious stuff —> making out, somewhat possessive!Wooyoung(not toxic), Wooyoung gets jealous:>, kind of idiots to lovers. kind of slow burn. apologies for any typos I’m afraid I can’t re read this even one more time
the hollow feeling in your chest eats at you while you lay on your couch, snuggled in a blanket clad in one of Wooyoung’s soft grey hoodies. you pull the hood up over your head and stare at the chipped paint on the wall.
would you ever find someone who loved you enough? someone who would stick by you after seeing you at your worst; someone who would kiss the scars on your body and reassure you when you got insecure. someone who would look at you with overwhelming love and whisper I love you between kisses on your skin.
you wanted it to be Wooyoung. god, you wanted him to love you like that, but Wooyoung has only ever looked at you like his best friend. and you should be thankful for that, after all, you were so incredibly lucky to be close to Wooyoung, able to receive the intense amount of love and care he has to offer.
but you can’t help but feel selfish and wish for more.
a knock on your door pulls you from your spiraling. you allow yourself to stare into nothingness for a second longer before pulling yourself together and getting up to open the door.
the winter breeze feels crisp against your bare legs. you look up to see who’s visited you so late, and there he is; dressed in baggy jeans and a black tee shirt layered with a jacket much too large for him, there was Wooyoung. your Wooyoung.
well, in your dreams anyway.
you’re once again pulled out of your spiraling when he calls out to you with that irritatingly gentle, yet teasing voice of his, “Y/n? Are you gonna let me in?” and suddenly you’re back to reality.
the cold night air brushes against your skin again, goosebumps arising in their wake; a reminder of how cold Wooyoung must be.
you roll your eyes and smile, grabbing Wooyoung's arm and pulling him in. he lets you lock the door before engulfing you in a hug. you inhale softly at the smell of his subtle cologne and wrap your arms around his back, shutting your eyes and allowing yourself the selfishness of wanting him close. but he breaks the hug a moment later, looking at you with that maddening smile and you feel yourself relax in his presence.
“So, what’re we watching?” he asks lightly, pulling your arm towards the couch as if he lives there. and he might as well, with how often he sleeps over. he removes his jacket, throwing it on the couch before sitting down. you struggle to not ogle his arms, “Nothing, actually.”
you plop down on the couch next to him, an unfamiliar distance between the two of you. you hope he won’t notice, but Wooyoung looks at you with an unreadable expression as he observes the space.
“Are you okay?” he asks quietly, serious eyes boring into yours.
of course, he noticed immediately, you think fondly. “I’m just tired, honestly. but let’s watch something?” you smile, trying to change the subject.
Wooyoung lets it go, but only after squinting his eyes and moving closer to you. you sigh when his shoulder touches yours, craving the skinship yet hating yourself for it.
Wooyoung decides on a random movie, and while you were distracted throughout the film, your eyes immediately snap to his phone when a notification pops up. Wooyoung picks it up, swipes to open the message, and text back.
you force yourself not to check who he’s texting and speak casually, “What is it?”
he glances up at you before looking down and shutting his phone off, “Just Miyu, she’s asking if we can see each other tomorrow.”
“Oh, are you guys a thing then?” a forced smile makes its way to your face, though you ensure it looks genuine enough for Wooyoung to not notice.
he exhales, “Honestly? Not really. I like her and I think she’s really cute, but I’m not sure I see myself in a committed relationship with her.”
Wooyoung runs a hand through his two-toned hair, black strands falling over the blonde, “I’ll see how it goes though after a few dates.”
“Good luck!” you smile; a response you always gave whenever Wooyoung told you he was dating someone. because although it hurt, you wished him happiness, even if that meant he found it in someone else.
the rest of the night goes uneventful, but you can’t stop thinking about the fact that something needs to change. you don’t want to do it anymore; you don’t want to sit on the sidelines and watch your best friend fall in love with someone other than you.
but Wooyoung was never going to choose you, so perhaps it was time you found someone who would.
you needed to move on, you realize. not only for yourself, but so you could continue to be close with Wooyoung even after he ultimately finds another girl; someone who isn't you. with a goal in mind, you bite your lip and click the contact of the only person you could think of; Hongjoong.
-
"So what, i’m supposed to just ask for his number?" you sigh, already regretting asking for his help.
Hongjoong crosses his arms, "Yes, exactly that. Men love when women ask for their numbers, something about the assertiveness or some shit like that.” he shrugs.
you squint wearily at him, “Well, you don’t sound so convinced yourself, but I don’t really have anyone else to ask,”
you groan as you watch Hongjoong’s face stretch into a smirk. “Okay, asshole, when should I do it?”
“Do it today after your last class.” Hongjoong moves closer to you and whispers, “From what I know, Yeonjun’s class ends at the same time as yours. So when he’s leaving the building, you just need to be ready to catch him.”
you pout at his instructions, unsure how you’ll manage to do something like this. Hongjoong pats your head in comfort. “Okay… thank you Joongie, I’ll try my best.”
You move to wrap your arms around his waist, feeling his chest rumble with a laugh, “No need to thank me Y/nie, just let me know how it goes, and if he’s an ass to you I’ll beat him up.” he pulls back at you to wink and you push him away with a laugh. Well, what could possibly go wrong?
-
Everything is going wrong. you were supposed to be running out of class immediately to find Yeonjun, but someone accidentally ran into you, dumping their entire large caramel macchiato on you in the process.
and unlucky for you, you were wearing white; now you had to put off asking Yeonjun out and walk home with sticky skin and a stained shirt.
you ruffle your hands in your hair frustratedly as you exit the school building, regretting not bringing a hoodie that day. in your rushed walk towards your car, you fail to notice someone standing right in front of you.
you run straight into their chest.
“Oh my fucking-, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going.” you blurt out quickly, eyes filling up with tears in exhaustion as you look up to see Yeonjun.
Yeonjun.
No, No. No. this could not be happening.
you were supposed to ‘casually’ run into him with your hair neatly done and your outfit clean, but here you were with a huge stain on your chest and mascara tainting your tears.
your eyes move towards the floor as a tear falls, avoiding eye contact as you quickly wipe it away.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay. nothing to apologize or get upset for,” he reassures, hands scrambling before landing on your shoulders.
he bends down to catch your eyes, “You okay? Doesn’t look like you’re having a very good day.”
and maybe it’s because you’re fed up with the events that occurred. not just the stupid sticky shirt but your stupid massive crush on your best friend that hasn’t gone away no matter how hard you try that you’re talking to the guy you were supposed to ask out to get over him and-
Yeonjun tucks a piece of hair behind your ear, staring at you in concern as you sniffle, trying to calm down and not have a total mental breakdown in front of someone you were not close with.
“Uh… I don’t exactly know what’s making you so sad, but if you need anything I’m here, even if we don’t know each other so well.” he smiles cutely, and your eyes dart to his full lips before glancing back at his eyes.
you don’t say anything, mind scattered and tired after the long day you’ve had. you wonder how you’re even functioning in this conversation with one of the hottest guys you’ve seen.
Yeonjun pouts once he realizes you are too tired to speak, before an idea comes to mind and his eyes light up. he grabs the hem of his hoodie and pulls it over his head, ruffling his hand through his hair as he hands it to you.
you don’t understand, this interaction is a lot more confusing than you initially thought it would be. but perhaps that was just your luck. your hands reach out unsure, so he pushes the hoodie in your arms firmly.
you clutch the lavender coloured fabric in your hands tightly, looking up at him in confusion. “What’s this for?”
he smiles again. you find you really like his smile. not as much as Wooyoungs though, an evil voice in your head reminds you. you frown as you ignore it.
“Well, I’m going to assume one of the things that’s got you so upset is about your shirt, so don’t worry about it, you can return the hoodie whenever you want,” he reassures kindly.
Your cheeks feel hot as you remember the humiliating stain. “Ah… I see. Thank you, you really didn’t have to do this for me.”
“It’s okay, honestly! Like I said, don’t worry about it.”
you bite your lip and nod, before remembering your mission to ask for his number. would it be too awkward now? would he even want to speak to you after this odd encounter? your mind races as you think of what to do next.
luckily, Yeonjun picks for you.
“I don’t really know if this is an appropriate time to ask, but could I by chance get your number?” he looks to the side, rubbing the back of his neck as a light blush coats his cheeks.
your face brightens at his question, and a soft laugh bubbles out of you at the sight of his blush.
“Yeah, sure, of course.”
he opens his phone and hands it to you. your fingers shake as you type your number in, but you hand it back to him with a steady smile.
“Thanks, I should get going, but I hope the rest of your day goes well.” he winks.
your eyebrows raise at his sudden confidence, but you would be lying if you said you didn’t find it attractive.
“Okay,” you smile, “Thank you for the hoodie, really it means a lot.”
he shakes his head back at you, “It was nothing, seriously. and I’ll text you later!”
you bow your head, agreeing as you watch him wave before jogging to his friends.
you clutch the hoodie in your hands tightly as you turn to walk to your car. you smile giddily,
mission accomplished.
-
it’s a Friday evening.
Wooyoung lays on your bed unceremoniously as he scrolls on his phone while you search your closet for an outfit to wear to the party tonight.
while normally you would’ve gone for something a little more comfortable, you decide to go for something more risky.
you did enjoy parties, but tonight you had someone’s attention to catch. someone who wasn’t the boy sitting on your bed.
“I don’t get why you’re putting so much thought into it. We go to parties all the time, what’s so different about this one?” Wooyoung nags, body laying on his side as he’s perched up on his hand, elbow digging into the mattress.
you huff, “Because! I just want to look prettier tonight, isn’t that a valid reason itself?”
Wooyoung looks at you suspiciously before sighing, “Fine, fine! I’ll find out the truth eventually y/nie,”
you roll your eyes at his tone before looking in the full-body mirror. you have a tight black skirt on paired with a matching fitted cropped shirt. underneath the skirt are sheer stockings, and you top it off with an oversized leather jacket.
your makeup and hair are already done, styled in your preferred way as you twirl in front of your mirror with a happy smile. this will surely catch Yeonjun's attention tonight, and your stomach swirls with joy at the thought.
a cough breaks you out of your stupor and you look up to find Wooyoung staring at you with wide eyes. his cheeks are tinted red as he licks his bottom lip.
“What? Does it look bad?” You look down self-consciously, unused to Wooyoung looking at you like that. you wonder if this outfit will catch more attention than you predicted.
he shakes his head and relaxes his face, “No, no. I was just surprised.”
he smirks, “You look hot.”
your lips part stupidity as you swiftly turn around to face the mirror again. “Shut up,” you mumble, ignoring the way your heart jumped at his words.
-
Loud music blares through your ears as you step foot into the party, eyes scanning the chaotic room for someone familiar. Wooyoung grabs your hand, lacing your fingers with his as he pulls you towards your mutual friends. you stare at your intertwined hands in awe before remembering that it meant nothing.
nothing to him at least.
your fingers slip from his grasp once you reach your friends and he looks at you in confusion. you smile reassuringly at him, however, and he turns back without noticing anything.
you bite your lip as you look around; you need to leave. not the party, but you need to leave from Wooyoung's side. you don’t belong there. you never have.
you tug at Wooyoung's arm to get his attention, prompting him to bend down as you speak into his ear, “I’m gonna go get a drink.”
“Okay! Just let me tell them and we can go.” he smiles dazzlingly, but you frown in response.
“No! Stay here, it’s okay! I’ll get it myself.”
the smile slowly slips from his face and his brows furrow. you look around anxiously, you don’t know why you feel so nervous. "Alright, just be careful and call me if you need anything, okay?” he grabs your arm, gazing at you seriously, and your stomach rolls at his protectiveness. you wish he wouldn’t be so perfect. but this was Wooyoung, so that was rather impossible.
you nod at him in response before leaving, letting out a breath when you were far enough.
you glance back at Wooyoung who is speaking animatedly, upset that you couldn’t enjoy yourself with him all because of your selfish feelings. you ignore the internal pull to be close and turn back around.
until you bump directly into someone’s chest.
“Fuck, what is wrong with me lately?” you murmur to yourself, rubbing your nose lightly before looking up.
“I’m so- Yeonjun?!”
the universe is not on your side it appears, as the Choi Yeonjun is in front of you looking at you with that cute boyish smile. you want to melt into a puddle of embarrassment then and there.
he chuckles at your expression, “So, is running into people always your thing? Or is that exclusive to me only?” his lips stretch into a grin.
“Seems to be exclusive to you, unfortunately,” you say teasingly, giggling at his offended look.
he puts a hand above his heart appearing wounded, “Unfortunately?! I will have you know it should be considered an honor to bump into me.”
“Considered an honor by who? Yourself?” you gloat, enjoying the flirty banter with a guy you found immensely attractive.
he clicks his tongue before giving up the facade and smiling genuinely. “I thought you said you’d text me when you got here.” he pouts at you; you have to force yourself to look away from his lips.
you and Yeonjun had been texting ever since your little run-in on campus. he knew you were coming here, hence the fact that you also put in more effort for your look today. you hadn’t exactly told Wooyoung about him either, unsure how your best friend would react to you randomly finding interest in dating.
“I just got here! I was going to text you once I got a drink, I promise.”
he nods sulkily, and you suddenly think he and Wooyoung would get along well. “Okay then, let’s go get you a drink?” he asks, grabbing your hand to lead you.
you stare at your hand in his as he leads you through the swarm of people. his is much larger than yours, warmth radiating off him so intensely you wish you could feel butterflies. but it is nothing in comparison to how you feel with your hand intertwined with Wooyoungs, and your heart dims at the realization.
the rest of the night goes by fast and enjoyable, and you find yourself enamoured with Yeonjun. but as much as you wish you liked him romantically, you find him amazing platonically at best.
you feel as though you are fighting a losing battle, and that using Yeonjun to get over Wooyoung would not only fail, but be selfish in case he caught feelings for you.
so when it gets a little too late, you make your way back to Wooyoung. Yeonjun is still next to you, and the two of you are engaging in a very serious conversation about whether or not water is wet when you feel someone grab your waist softly.
you jump at the feeling, unintentionally moving closer to Yeonjun until you turn around to find Wooyoung.
you relax at the sight of him, now gravitating to Wooyoung subconsciously, “Hi! Ready to go? I’m so tired and my head is pounding from the music.”
Wooyoung smiles at you, but it looks forced. “Yeah, yeah. Who’s this?” he tilts his head toward Yeonjun, and you blanch as you realize what kind of situation you put yourself in. but it shouldn’t go awry; the two didn’t know each other, and Wooyoung had no idea that you were interested in Yeonjun- if you could even call it that.
“This is Yeonjun, he goes to our University. He’s majoring in Dance actually, just like you!” you try unsure, glancing back to Yeonjun to assess his face.
he doesn’t look as standoffish as Wooyoung however, seeming rather amused as he eyes Wooyoung's hand on your waist.
“Hey, it’s nice to meet you. I hope I didn’t hog Y/n to myself all night.”
Wooyoung's hand tightens as he takes a step closer to you. you can smell the cologne on him and feel the heat coming from him on your back.
Wooyoung laughs, but it is far from genuine, “No, of course not. Y/n is her own person, she can hang out with whoever she wants, even if it’s with someone like you.”
your head whips to Wooyoung, face scandalized at his last words. you push at his chest, moving him away from Yeonjun, “Dude, not fucking cool.”
you turn back to Yeonjun, ignoring the way he is still staring at Wooyoung in mirth.
“I’m sorry, he’s had a long night and too much to drink, we should get going.” You slap your hand over Wooyoung's mouth when he moves to open it, giving a crooked smile to Yeonjun as Wooyoung fumbles beneath your hand.
Yeonjun glances at Wooyoung before his eyes land on you, “No worries, I get it. Just text me when you get home. I’ll see you on Monday?”
you nod quickly, “Yeah, of course, I’ll see you then!”
without another word, you grab Wooyoung's arm and drag him out of the house and into his car. once seated in the passenger seat, you open your hand and look at him expectantly.
he glances to your open palm, “What?”
“Keys.” you sigh, wanting this night to be over so you can lay in bed and go to sleep.
Wooyoung places the keys in your hand with a pout and you clutch them before standing up, shutting his door, and getting in the driver's seat.
“So, Yeonjun huh? Didn’t know you two were so close.” Wooyoung says, voice cutting the deafening silence. your hands tighten on the wheel as you focus on the road.
Wooyoung is still sulking, and while you have no idea why, you also have no interest in finding out. his behavior in front of Yeonjun was extremely uncalled for and disrespectful, and you would give him an earful had he not drank anything tonight. “C'mon, Y/nie, don’t ignore me. I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have talked to him like that but I just... got bad vibes from him.”
you roll your eyes at his words, though some of your anger diminishes at his apology. well, at least he knew why you were upset.
“Bad vibes? Why? You’ve spoken to him for a total of two minutes.”
Wooyoung deflates. it seems he knows he is being unreasonable. “I dunno, okay? But listen, I’m allowed to be upset too. You haven’t told me anything about your relationship with Yeonjun, and I'm your best friend.”
you glance at his crestfallen face before sighing, “You’re right, I’m sorry too. I should have told you about him, I just didn’t know how to bring it up.”
“It’s okay I guess, but I’ll only forgive you on one condition.”
you narrow your eyes at him before looking back to the road, “And what would that be?”
Wooyoung grins mischievously, “You tell me all about it. When did you first meet, how did you first meet, how often do you text? And most importantly, how it went tonight with him!” he rambles excitedly, and you hate that he seems so happy at the prospect of you speaking to a guy.
and so you begin to tell Wooyoung the events leading up to the party, including the details such as your stained shirt, the hoodie, the fact that the two of you have been texting for quite a while, and why you dressed up tonight.
he nods excitedly at you as you go through the events while driving, but you fail to notice the dimness in his eyes and how his smile seems a little more strained as you go on a tangent about Yeonjun's cute lips.
you arrive home soon after, dropping Wooyoung off and parking his car before walking to your apartment. the two of you lived quite close.
once in bed, you recount the events that occurred at the party, stomach lurching when you remember Wooyoung's possessive hand on you.
but then the butterflies morph into moths, an ugly wretched feeling of yearning swallows you whole, and you find yourself spiraling at the realization that you are zero steps closer to getting over Jung Wooyoung. you have merely been going in circles from the start.
Wooyoung on the other hand, lays in bed with a permanent frown. he doesn’t understand the irritation he feels towards Yeonjun, and he certainly doesn’t understand why he felt threatened by seeing you two together. you were his best friend, and that’s all you’ve ever been to him.
but as he stares at his ceiling and pictures a life where you are not his, he wonders if you’ve meant more to him all along.
-
"I’m going to break things off with Yeonjun." You rest your head on your hands, elbows perched on the table in front of you.
Hongjoong sits before you, mouth open as he looks at you as if you are crazy. and perhaps you are for even thinking of letting Yeonjun go, but you were never really a selfish person, much less a selfish lover. and while you were not considered Yeonjun's lover just yet, you figure you need to pull back now before the tide takes you too far, leaving you stranded and alone drowning in your own consequences.
he exhales rather dramatically, "Are you sure? I'm going to be honest, I don't understand at all. Everything has been going so well! Why would you give up now?"
"But it hasn't been going so well Joong. I find him attractive but my feelings for Wooyoung are still very much there and alive." You take a sip of your drink, allowing the cool beverage to calm you. "I don't want to be one of those assholes who lead someone on when they aren't over their first crush or whatever."
you shake your head, "That's never going to be me."
Hongjoong nods understandingly. "Well, if you put it like that I can't really disagree."
he reaches over from across the table to pat your head comfortingly, "I'm proud of you, though. You are so selfless, it makes me worry someone will take advantage of you." You smile abashed at his praise, having always looked up to Hongjoong.
"Don't worry, I'm strong too, okay? I learned from you, after all." You smile as he scoffs teasingly.
Hongjoong glances out the window before looking back at you, "So, when are you planning on breaking the news to him? And what do you plan to do after?"
you press your lips together, "I asked him to meet me in an hour, so hopefully that goes well."
"As for after that..." you smile bitterly, "Maybe I'll confess to Wooyoung. I don't know, maybe a rejection would help me move on properly."
Honghoong tilts his head up and down, "You're a good person, y'know? It's not selfish of you to catch feelings for someone. Stuff like that is inevitable."
"And confessing your feelings wouldn't be a burden, I know what you are thinking, you deserve an answer to your feelings, whether that is an acceptance or a rejection."
you smile at Hongjoong's words, "Thank you, my unpaid therapist I so dearly love."
"Anytime." he deadpans, and you giggle as you watch his face break out into a smile.
you leave the coffee shop soon after, enjoying the breeze as you walk back to campus to meet Yeonjun. you aren't sure how your talk will go, but you know you need to get everything off of your chest, including the guilt of leading Yeonjun on.
"Y/n!" a voice calls out from behind you, and you turn to see Yeonjun waving at you. He jogs up to you, smiling once he is close, "Hey! How are you doing?"
you grin softly at him, "I'm doing okay, how about you?"
he runs a hand through his hair, and you are once again reminded of his strikingly amazing looks. you hope he finds someone to appreciate him as he deserves. "I'm alright, but I'm guessing you have something to speak to me about after that ominous text."
"Yeah... you're right." you glance up at him before looking back in front of you. "Lets walk and I'll tell you?"
"Of course, start whenever you're ready."
you exhale shakily, "So, there is no easy way to say this, but for as long as I've known Wooyoung, I have had feelings for him," You bite your lip, ripping the bandaid off immediately. "Maybe it was something about the way he treated me, or the way he treated everyone else. He was just so full of love and I was immediately smitten."
you look up into Yeonjun's eyes, "It's been three years, and no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to get over him." You move to stand directly in front of Yeonjun. "I owe you a massive apology. I am so incredibly sorry for showing interest in you despite having feelings for someone else. It wasn't right for me to practically use you, not when you have been so good to me from the beginning."
you finish your apology with a deep bow, only rising when Yeonjun scrambles to make you stand straight.
"Well, I can't say I'm totally surprised. I did see how he looked at you at the party, but I do appreciate the apology." he smiles, not seeming resentful in the slightest. you wonder if he was an angel in his past life.
but you're also confused, "What do you mean how he looked at me? It's unrequited, he only sees me as his best friend." Your mind races as you try to imagine what Yeonjun could possibly mean, but you try not to get your hopes up.
he tilts his head, "I just mean he looked really jealous, but I guess you didn't notice." You look at Yeonjun with furrowed brows, before pushing the thought out entirely. you could overthink this later, when you weren't in the presence of the sweet guy in front of you.
"Anyway! I just wanted to talk to you about that. I really am sorry, and I hope we can be friends even if I was a selfish asshole."
Yeonjun shakes his head seriously, "You are not a selfish asshole for trying to get over him. You telling me all of this now proves that you are much kinder than you give yourself credit for."
"And of course we're friends! If it makes you feel any better, I'm still not one hundred percent over my ex, so I hope that will ease your conscience." he pats your shoulder reassuringly.
you raise your eyebrows at his confession. "Thank you, seriously." You move to hug him and he wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into him firmly.
what you don't notice, is your best friend staring at you a few feet away, your favorite donut in one hand and his iced americano in the other.
he eyes Yeonjun's arms wrapped around you, wanting nothing more than to pull him off and surround you with himself instead. you deserved someone better than Yeonjun. you deserved someone who would make you breakfast when you slept in; someone who would bring you hot cocoa between classes during harsh winters, and someone who would shower you with more love than you could possibly imagine.
he could do that for you; he could be that person for you.
Wooyoung's chest feels lighter when he realizes what this means, but his brows furrow as he watches you break apart from Yeonjun, looking up at him with a sweet smile. he pouts, glancing at the donut in his hand as he turns away, a new goal in mind.
he is going to pursue you. not Miyu, whom he hadn't had an interest in quite some time, nor Yujin, the girl from his class who wouldn't leave him alone. he doesn't know why he's been searching so hard for something- or someone who was right there all along.
but he has time to make up for it, and he certainly will.
The next time you see Wooyoung is during your break between classes. you are sitting at a bench outside, headphones on as you whisper the lyrics to 'Dust' by Seventeen.
you shriek when you feel a cold sensation on the back of your neck, pulling your headphones off as you hear that familiar cackle behind you. you glare at Wooyoung as he wipes tears from his eyes, finding you very amusing.
"I'm glad that was so funny to you," you say snarkily, but all Wooyoung does is beam at you in response. "You're not going to thank me? I drove all the way to the store to grab it."
you glance down at the cold drink in front of you, seeing your ultimate favorite beverage from a store all the way across town. you look up to Wooyoung with an excited smile, "Oh shit! Thank you, you really shouldn't have."
Wooyoung shrugs your comment off with a wave of his hand, but his cheeks burn pleasantly. he takes a seat next to you, nuzzling your neck as he wraps his arms around your waist and you freeze. you haven't been this close to Wooyoung in weeks, courtesy of the distance you implemented in order to get over him.
"I miss you," he whispers, and you relax instantly. the last thing you wanted was for Wooyoung to feel neglected in your friendship, so you accept his hug without a care for your initial goal.
you pat his head, running your hands through his hair as you notice it has gotten quite long. he melts underneath your touch, and you smile fondly. "You okay?" you ask.
Wooyoung lifts his head, facing you. the two of you are inches apart, and your heart races at the close proximity. you can see his precious dot, as he likes to call it; your eyes trace his nose bridge as your gaze falls to his lips, eyeing the beauty mark on his bottom lip.
he bites his lower lip, and you glance back up to his eyes, noticing his gaze stuck on your lips as well. you wonder what he’s thinking.
you swiftly turn to your laptop, "So, how was class?" Your cheeks feel hot, and your chest burns. you were about two seconds away from saying fuck it and kissing him.
Wooyoung sighs, "It was okay I guess. Nothing interesting, I'd rather be with you."
your stomach lurches at his words, but you turn to him puzzled. "Isn't Miyu in your last class? What happened?"
"Nothing," he shrugs. "I've just realized there are more important things for me to focus on. More important people to focus on."
you stare at his unusual seriousness, "Ah... I see."
he suddenly smiles brightly, "Plus, I'd rather be around my Y/nie than any other girl!" he moves to hug you again, and you stare bitterly at the drink in front of you.
you would never get over him. it was like clockwork.
-
"Okay, let's go?" you ask Wooyoung, who is once again perched up on your bed as you exit your bathroom, spraying your perfume and eyeing the black bodycon dress that hugged your body flatteringly.
when you look up Wooyoung is standing with his arms crossed, mouth pursed in a pout. you raise your eyebrows at him, "What?"
he falls backward on your bed, facing the ceiling. "How is it possible to look that beautiful. I'll never know."
your heart jumps like it always does when he compliments you, though you giggle as you wave him off, "C'mon, Youngie, we’ll be late."
the two of you arrive at the club less than thirty minutes later, and Wooyoung laces his fingers with yours the moment you step in. you glance down, stomach swirling at the sight of the rings adorning his hands and prominent veins leading up his arms. you bite your lip and look up; you could not get distracted by his arms so early into the night.
"Wooyoung! Y/n! It's so good to see you." the tall bartender greets.
you smile up at him, "It's good to see you too, Mingi. I hope you're doing well,"
Mingi nods, "I am, and I'm doing even better after seeing you two. It's nice to see some familiar faces in this place."
"When you finish your shift you should come with us! We miss you, Mangi, it's been too long." Wooyoung whines from his place beside you. you roll your eyes at his antics, but you would be lying if you said you didn't miss Mingi too.
Mingi laughs, smiling at the two of you. "So, the usual?"
"Yup! Please and thank you." You grin cheekily. Mingi winks before leaving to get your drinks.
Wooyoung turns to you, "The others should be here any second now, I'm honestly shocked we got here first." You lean your head on Wooyoung's shoulder, unable to hear his breath hitch due to the loud music, "I'm not really surprised, we've always been punctual people."
you lift your head and smile at him, faces close as you wink, "That's why we get along so well."
Wooyoung gulps at your closeness as he smiles nervously, "Yeah, I really hate people who are late." You giggle and nod, understanding him completely.
a large figure runs into Wooyoung from behind as their arms wrap around him, and you laugh as you watch San smile at you from his place on Wooyoung's shoulder, "Hi, Y/nie! Youngie! I've missed you guys so much, it's been like, forever!"
"It's actually been three days, but I gather that's too long for you two." you tease, and Wooyoung pouts at you as he turns around to hug San properly.
San moves to hug you next, "Yeosang and Hongjoong are using the bathroom, those two losers drank too much water or something." San looks disgusted as Wooyoung giggles.
"TMI Sannie, TMI," you say stifling a laugh. San was very close to Wooyoung, and very similar to Wooyoung. those two were the cutest platonic soulmates you've seen, and it has always been fun when they were together.
"What did you tell them, San-ah?" a deep voice deadpans from behind you. you turn to see Yeosang and Hongjoong, squinting at San as he hides behind Wooyoung.
you jump out of your seat, "Sangie!" you run into his arms, squeezing him tightly. "I missed you so much, you barely come to these events anymore." You pout up at him as he smiles, "Sorry, Y/n, I've been a little busy, but I promise I'll try to come as often as I can."
Hongjoong stands to the side, "The fuck am I? Chopped liver?"
you break away from Yeosang and giggle as you move to hug Hongjoong as well, "Hi, Joongie. I missed you as well, even if I saw you two days ago."
"Uh-huh. Sure." Hongjoong says dismissively, though the smile on his face tells a different story.
the four of you move to a booth, ordering another round of drinks along with some food. the night is fun, filled with laughter and jokes as you watch Wooyoung and Hongjoong bicker like children. you are almost finished your meal when you spot a familiar head through the crowd.
"I'll be right back, I want to go say hi to someone," you tell them, taking a sip of your drink before sliding out of the booth as you stare at your target.
Wooyoung eyes you from his seat, ignoring the looks of mirth he gets from his friends. you look amazing tonight, just as you do every night, and it's been hard for him to not want to keep his arms wrapped around you the whole time. not because of others staring, but because of how irresistible you look. he wonders who you have left to speak to, but once he gets a glimpse of their face, he scowls.
Yeonjun.
"Yeonjun! Hi!" you greet, smiling toothily at the tall man.
he looks shocked for a moment before his face relaxes at the sight of you, "Hey, Y/n, how's it going?" he moves to hug you, arms covering your torso as you stretch to hug his neck. you feel as though someone is staring at you from behind, but shrug it off as you look back to Yeonjun.
"It's good! Hongjoong, Yeosang, and Wooyoung are over there." You point back to them, and Yeonjun glances at the table, coughing when he sees Wooyoung glaring at him.
"Oh, that's cool. I came with Beomgyu, and HueningKai. They're over there getting shitfaced as we speak."
you look behind him and find the two of them dancing sloppy and chuckle at the sight. "And let me guess, you are the responsible parent for the night?"
Yeonjun sighs, "Unfortunately. Without me, these idiots wouldn't end up home most nights."
you nod at him, amused.
"So, how's everything with Mr. Loverboy?" Yeonjun asks, tilting his head toward Wooyoung. you glance back and catch Wooyoung's eye; he smiles charmingly, and you grin back before facing Yeonjun, and your face drops. "I actually have no idea. Sometimes it feels like we're having a moment, but then he treats me like normal, so I'm not really sure."
you exhale, "If there's one thing I know, though, it's that he isn't interested in any girl right now. He told me he has more important things and people to focus on or something like that."
you smile sadly, "I wonder if it's too naive to think it's me."
Yeonjun scoffs loudly, and you look up to him startled. "Listen, if I wasn't sure before, I am sure now. Wooyoung most definitely feels the same way about you." he leans down to your ear, feeling only slightly scared as Wooyoung glowers at him from across the room. "Not only was he incredibly jealous the first time I met him, but he has been shooting daggers at me since you approached me."
Yeonjun lifts his head and smiles encouragingly, "I'm sure all he needs is a little push, and he'll confess. Don't give up yet, Y/n. He's almost there, I can tell."
you look at Yeonjun, not very convinced though not as dejected as before. "Okay, yeah. I should get back."
You glance at his friends, "Good luck with those two, let me know if I can help." You smile, giggling when Yeonjun sighs dramatically at the sight of them.
"Don't worry, I can handle them. You should focus on the jealous boy who's waiting for you across the room." Yeonjun waves before giving you a little push towards Wooyoung, "Please, go before he rips my head off."
you roll your eyes with a chuckle, smiling as you wave and make your way back to your friends and Wooyoung. you attempt to swiftly pass the people dancing, but you get caught up in the crowd, losing sight of the table and struggling to get out.
when a hand grabs at your wrist, you flinch, moving back as you cradle your arm against you protectively. "Hey, sweetness," a gruff voice comes and you glance up to see an older man with missing teeth.
Just what you needed.
your hands shake as you attempt to move past him, "Sorry, not interested." but he grabs your arm again and you rip it out of his grasp for the second time.
"I said I'm not interested."
he laughs, and you can smell his rancid breath from where you stand. "You don't mean that, c'mon, why else would you be wearing that?" Your face drops at his comment, and your mind races as you wonder if you'll be able to run fast enough to lose him. you glance at the dancing bodies surrounding you, realizing that was highly unlikely.
but before you can panic any longer, a familiar scent fills your senses as you are pulled into someone's chest. you flinch again, still jittery, but when you see Wooyoung you relax immediately.
Wooyoung curls an arm around your waist and you sink into his embrace, "She said she’s not interested, you fucking loser." he glowers, face devoid of the usual joy it contains, as his eyes are hardened with protectiveness.
“Well, maybe she shouldn't be wearing that outfit if she didn't want the attention!" the man yells, causing people to look your way as a circle forms surrounding the three of you. you tug at Wooyoungs arm when you see his nose flare in anger not wanting things to get physical, "Wooyoung, fuck this idiot, don't bother with him," you glance up at the man before you,
"He has enough problems, like the fact that he wakes up every day looking like that." You sneer.
Wooyoung grins, "Good point."
the man opens his mouth in fury, but he gets interrupted, "Is there a problem here?" Two security guards approach and the man pales. you interject before he can speak, "Yes, actually. This guy grabbed me twice when I said I wasn't interested."
the man flails uselessly as the two men escort him out, cursing at them in rage. a rather anticlimactic ending to such a panic-inducing situation, but you gratefully accept it. you exhale once they are out of sight, relaxing onto Wooyoung as he wraps both of his arms around your waist. you feel exhausted, though Wooyoung feels comforting around you, and you do not wish to move.
"Y/nie, let's go home?" he whispers in your ear, and you nod slowly before turning around and burying your face in his neck. Wooyoung, your Wooyoungie. you feel tears spring to your eyes, because the truth is he wasn't yours.
perfect, protective, kind, thoughtful, and sweet Wooyoung was not yours, and you find that thought a little harder to digest right now. Wooyoung feels something wet on his neck as he looks down at you worriedly, "Y/n? Are you okay?"
you don't respond, clutching him harder as he curses before maneuvering you outside.
the cooler night air feels refreshing as it greets you, and you sniffle once the door closes and you are alone with Wooyoung. "What's wrong, Y/nie? Talk to me, pretty."
another tear streams down your face at the term of endearment as you push him away frustrated. "Don't call me that!"
Wooyoung's face drops, "Don't call you pretty?" he looks at you helplessly, "I-I'm sorry, but I don't- Are you upset about what just happened? Because why does it seem like you're upset with me?"
you wipe your tears, annoyed with your shaky hands and legs that felt much too like jello. "I am upset! I'm scared because that was a really scary situation to be in, but more importantly, I'm upset with you!"
Wooyoung looks heartbroken, his hand reaching out to you before falling to his side.
"It's not fucking fair, okay? You don't get to buy me sweet drinks and get possessive when I flirt with someone, and then glare daggers into guys I'm just friends with and protect me from creepy ugly men without me catching feelings for you!" you cry out, breathing heavily as you continue.
"I'm so tired of the shitty butterflies I get when I see you, or the sadness I feel when you look at every girl but me, and most of all I'm sick of your stupid pretty lips that look way too pretty to be real and- now I'm rambling about your lips being pretty-"
he grabs your cheeks gently, pushing his lips onto yours and your brain short circuits. your hands lift unsure, before finding purchase on Wooyoung's broad shoulders as you part your mouth, a small noise leaving your throat when he bites your bottom lip gently.
he pulls back first, and you swallow the whine you want to let out. "I have feelings for you too, Y/n. I'm sorry it took me so long to figure that out, but I'm here now." he smiles unsure, "And uh, if it's okay with you, I'd like to take you out on a date sometime. Or something like that." he says shyly.
you smile at his red cheeks before cupping his face and pulling him down into another kiss, this time taking your time as you slip your tongue in and tug gently on his bottom lip back with your teeth, before parting and giggling at his furious blush.
"I'd love to go on a date with you." You kiss his nose and smile before grabbing his hand and leading him back to the car. "And you're coming home with me tonight! I deserve cuddles," you demand as Wooyoung stares at you dopily from behind.
you would get all the cuddles you wanted, and more. Wooyoung would give the world to you if you asked, because that was exactly what you deserved.
Extra:
“C’mon, Junnie. Don’t be scared. I just want to introduce you two since you both mean so much to me,” you whine at Yeonjun, pulling his arm as he shakes his head back and forth.
he whines back at you, “Why would you subject me to this knowing how Wooyoung feels about me? You are cruel, Y/n. Very cruel."
you roll your eyes at his dramatic behavior, “This is exactly what I mean when I say your extra ass will get along with Wooyoung. You two act so similar it’s honestly kind of scary.”
“Yeah, except I don’t glare at people when I feel jealous.” he crosses his arms, staring at the ‘Welcome’ sign in front of the cafe Wooyoung was waiting for you two at.
you push him closer to the door, “Please, Junnie? It would really mean a lot to me,” you beg softly, knowing Yeonjun wouldn’t be able to handle your sad eyes.
he sighs, head falling down before he looks back up, “Fine, fine. Just stop looking like a kicked puppy.”
you cheer with your arms up, smiling happily as you drag him inside.
“Wooyo!” you call, watching Wooyoung look up with a cute smile. you let go of Yeonjun's arm as you take quick steps toward your boyfriend, “I know you two know each other already, but this is time for re-introductions.” you state seriously, grabbing Wooyoung's hand softly.
he stares at you sulking, but listens obediently. “Wooyoung, this is Yeonjun, one of my close friends. Yeonjun, this is Wooyoung, my boyfriend! I hope you guys can get along well.”
the two of them wave half-heartedly, mumbling ‘hellos’ but you figure that’s good enough for now. “Okay, I’ll go grab the food then,”
you ignore the way both of them turn to you with wide eyes, smirking as you approach the front and leave them alone with one another.
Wooyoung glares at Yeonjun as he avoids eye contact, finding the stain on the table much more interesting. “So. Yeonjun, I’ll be frank, do you like Y/n?”
Yeonjun's eyes snap to Wooyoung's serious ones as he sighs, “No, I only like her as a friend, I promise.” Wooyoung sits back unconvinced as he crosses his arms. Yeonjun figures he should come clean and explain himself properly, for your sake at the very least.
“I understand why you would be skeptical, especially since we did flirt before, but neither of us actually felt anything for each other from the start. We may have tried, but Y/n was way too in love with you to even bother looking at me, and I was still getting over a breakup so I never really looked at her like that.” he bites his lip, glancing at Wooyoungs face for a reaction and is in shock when he sees Wooyoung... blushing.
“She’s… in love with me?” he smiles elated, and Yeonjun wonders if he spoke too much. “Well, yeah? I thought… oh fuck.” he rubs his hands on his face; he was just fucking up one thing after the other.
he places his hands on the table as he watches you pick up the food making your way back to the table, “Okay, please keep this conversation to yourself otherwise I will never see the light of day again.”
Wooyoung giggles, “Mmhm, no worries!” he looks the happiest Yeonjun has ever seen him, and he sighs as he figures Wooyoung wouldn’t out him immediately at least.
you place the tray of food on the table, “What’s got you so happy, Woo?” you ask, smiling at his very obvious joy.
“Nothing, nothing,” he winks at Yeonjun, and he has to stop himself from face palming.
you glance at Yeonjun amused, “Okay, you guys can keep your secrets, don’t mind me.”
the rest of the lunch goes by shockingly pleasant, as Wooyoung and Yeonjun get along just like you knew they would. by the time the three of you are leaving the cafe, Yeonjun and Wooyoung have their arms intertwined as Wooyoung tells Yeonjun about the time he free styled for his dance exam after someone stole his choreography, Yeonjun listening intently as his mouth parts in awe.
you giggle as you watch them from behind. sure, Yeonjun might be your new rival for Wooyoung’s attention, but so long as Wooyoung was happy, you didn’t mind. the grin on your face only grows when you watch them hug goodbye.
this was your true happy ending.
unofficial tags: @scuzmunkie
#ateez angst#ateez fanfic#ateez imagines#ateez x reader#ateez x you#wooyoung x reader#wooyoung x you#jung wooyoung x reader#wooyoung angst#wooyoung fluff#wooyoung x y/n
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Dad duties (pt.2) | cl16
Summary: where you meet an adorable dad and his little girl at the beach.
Warning: none, single dad Charles, a bunch of kisses and pure fluff... And a somewhat kinda spicy surprise near the end + shy Charles at the end too.
a/n: this is a little too long, but I hope you like it. Let me know if you want another part of this!!
Part 1
taglist 🤍 @mehrmonga @barcelonaloverf1life @sillyfreakfanparty
You find yourself waiting on the porch of your house, Charles had told you that he was going to be a little late since he was fixing some things with Ava, tonight is finally the famous date that you both had promised. The last few weeks have probably been the most fantastic of your life, the company of Charles and his little Ava make your days happier and brighter and that made you happy. You were so absorbed in your thoughts that you didn't realize that Charles was pulling up in front of your house, a smile already on your face.
“Hey y/n! You look incredible, so pretty, oh my...” He says as he gets out of the car, you were wearing a flattering dress, a little more dressed up than usual for your date night, you laugh slightly.
“Hey you handsome! Ready for our fancy dinner?” you say with a smile.
He smiles apologetically. “Uh... About that, there might be a slight change of plans.”
You both walk towards the car and he, like a gentleman, opens the passenger door for you, to which you thank him with a smile. You follow his gaze to the back seat, there, in a bright pink dress with white polka dots, sits Ava she beams at you, clutching a stuffed bunny, she giggles.
Your heart just melts, you weren't expecting Ava, but you can't help but smile even wider. “Hi there little princess! You look beautiful tonight!” You say happily.
Ava beams while Charles sighs apologetically. “Look, I'm so sorry babe. I couldn't find a babysitter on such a short notice and I was hoping maybe we could reschedule the dinner, but...” He was practically babbling, you cut him off.
You reach into the back and scoop Ava into your arms, tickling her belly. She erupts in delighted giggles.
“Charles, it's perfectly fine! Honestly, the more the merrier, don't you think? Besides who could say no to this cute little princess?”
Ava reaches out and tugs on your hair playfully. “Pwincess!” she giggled again and you nodded.
Charles looks surprised and relieved at your words. “You... You really don't mind babe?”
You glance at Charles, his eyes filled with warmth. “I don't mind at all darling! So... Where are we taking our little princess for dinner?” you asked softly while looking at him.
Charles throws his head back and smiled. “There's this great Italian place that has a fantastic kids' menu. Ava loves their pasta.”
You settle Ava back into her car seat, buckling her in. “Sounds perfect, Italian it is! Maybe she'll share some of her pasta with us?”
Charles leans over and gives you a quick kiss, you blush slightly. “Maybe... But you're definitely getting your own plate. This might be a date night with a little one in tow, but I still want to spoil you.” he winks at you.
“Just having you here is spoiling me enough.” you whisper softly. “Now, let's go get our little princess some dinner, I bet she's starving.”
You smile as Charles starts the car, his smile brighter than the restaurant lights ahead. You can't help but feel a warmth spread through you, this might not be exactly the date night you envisioned, but it's already shaping up to be something even better.
***
When you arrive at the restaurant the hostess leads Charles and you to a booth big enough for three with a high chair for Ava. The restaurant is super elegant, with soft music playing in the background.
Charles speaks smiling to Ava. “Alright, little one, what kind of pasta are you feeling tonight? They have farfalle shaped like butterflies, or penne that look like little tubes...”
Ava points excitedly at a picture on the kid's menu. “Bunny!” she giggles.
You and Charles look at the picture, then at each other and burst out laughing. “Looks like it's bunny pasta for the princess, I bet it's delicious!” You say with a smile on your face.
The waiter arrives, a friendly man with a neatly trimmed beard, Charles orders a glass of wine for you and a apple juice box for Ava, he also orders the bunny pasta for Ava, requesting it with a side of steamed vegetables. You order a light pasta dish and Charles gets something heartier. The conversation flows easily, sprinkled with stories about Ava's day and Charles' latest win on the track. You steal a glance at him while he chats whit Ava, noticing how his eyes crinkle when he smiles at his daughter.
“You're such a good dad, you know.” you say whispering.
Charles catches your eye and gives you a warm smile. “Thank you mon ange. Being a good dad is easy when you have a princess like her.” he whispers. (my angel)
While you wait for your food, you take out a small pack of crayons and a coloring book you brought from home. “Hey, Ava, want to color some pictures with me? See, this one has a cute bunny and another animals!”
Ava nods eagerly and starts coloring with delight. You watch her for a moment, then turn to Charles and you smile. “She's so much fun. I can't believe it's only been a few weeks...” you whisper softly.
Charles reaches across the table and takes your hand. “Me neither, you are amazing with her! You're even amazing to me.”
Just then, the waiter arrives with your food and drinks. You turn your attention to Ava, making sure she eats some vegetables before digging into the pasta.
The night continues like this - a delightful mix of conversation, laughter, a little spilled food, and genuine connection. While you might not have had the quiet, romantic dinner you initially planned, you find yourself enjoying this even more. It feels like the start of something special, a family you're slowly becoming a part of.
***
As the plates are cleared and Ava starts to get drowsy, Charles leans back in the booth.
“Looks like our little adventurer is ready for bed. What do you say we call it a night?” He says smiling as he holds Ava in his arms.
You nodded. “Looks like little miss enjoyed her bunny pasta a little too much, don't you think? We might be in for a long night... I can help put her to bed when we get home, I don't mind.” You say with a shy little smile.
Charles smiles, a hint of tiredness in his eyes. “Any help would be appreciated, you're a lifesaver, you know that?” he asked softly and you nod.
He throws his arm around your shoulder, pulling you close.
“So, how about we head straight home? Maybe we can watch a movie after Ava's asleep, just the two of us? How does that sound?” He asks you softly, the way his eyes hold yours makes the butterflies erupt in your stomach.
You smile once again. “Sounds like a perfect plan for me... Lead the way, papa.”
You two have a funny little argument about who pays the bill, but in the end he paid like a gentleman, and together you head out of the restaurant. The night air feels cooler now, but your heart is warm, as you walk side-by-side, Charles steals a kiss, quick and sweet, making butterflies explode in your stomach. You know this might be the beginning of something truly special, a messy, wonderful adventure with a charming single dad and his adorable daughter.
The car ride is filled with the soft snores of a sleeping Ava nestled in her car seat. Charles reaches over and squeezes your hand, a silent thank you for your help throughout the evening.
Pulling into his driveway, Charles helps you unbuckle Ava and carefully carries her inside. The house is quiet, bathed in a soft glow from a lamp left on in the living room, the white walls aren't so white anymore due to some colorful scratches on Ava's part, but it gives the place personality. Charles leads the way to Ava's room, a haven of pastel colors and stuffed animals.
“Alright, little one, it's bedtime. Let's get you out of those clothes, okay?” he whispers softly towards Ava.
He lays Ava gently on the changing table. You reach into the diaper bag that he had brought to dinner and pull out a pair of soft, pink pajamas with a fluffy bunny on the front.
You smile softly. “Looks like someone's favorite animal is making another appearance tonight.”
Charles chuckles, taking the pajamas from you. He expertly removes Ava's dress, careful not to wake her. You watch him with a lot of love and affection in your eyes, a comfortable silence settling around you both.
He started talking in a sing-along voice to Ava. “See, bunny pajamas for a sleepy bunny. Time for your warm snuggles, princess.” He slips the pajamas on Ava, who stirs slightly and lets out a contented sigh.
You help him to tuck Ava in. “She's so peaceful when she's asleep... You seem like a natural at this dad thing.”
Charles smiles, a touch of pride in his eyes. “Practice makes perfect, I guess. But having you here makes it a whole lot easier.” He leans in close, his gaze lingering on your lips. “Maybe after she's settled, we can have that movie night... just the two of us?” he whispers.
The air crackles with unspoken desire. You glance at Ava, a small smile playing on your lips. “Let's get her to sleep first, then we'll see. But don't expect a quiet night in. I might have some movie-related cuddles in mind.” you whisper back at him.
A slow grin spreads across Charles' face. He leans in and kisses you softly, the promise of more hanging in the air. Every time he kisses you it's like a dream, he is so sweet and delicate with you that it makes you sigh.
He smiles at you and whispers. “Sounds like a challenge I'm willing to accept.”
With a final goodnight kiss to Ava's forehead, you and Charles tiptoe out of the room, the quiet anticipation of a stolen moment hanging between you. Charles smiles at you, a silent thanks in his eyes. You return the smile, a pleasant tiredness settling over you.
“So... Movie night? Do you have any preferences?” he asks softly.
You shrug playfully and whisper. “Surprise me... Just something that doesn't require too much brainpower, I'm running in fumes after that mega dinner we had.” you let out a little giggle.
Charles chuckles and heads towards the living room and you follow him, collapsing onto the large couch with a contented sigh. He pops a movie into the DVD player, something light and comedic based on the box art.
The movie starts, and you snuggle up on the couch with a fluffy blanket, Charles sits beside you, leaving a comfortable gap initially. As the movie progresses, you find yourself drawn closer... You share a laugh at a funny scene, his arm brushing against yours, you don't shy away, instead leaning in slightly. He seems to mirror your movement, his warmth a comforting presence.
By the halfway point, you're practically cuddling, his arm wrapped loosely around your shoulders. You rest your head against his chest, his heartbeat a steady rhythm beneath your ear. The movie plays on in the background, but your focus has shifted.
Charles speak with a raspy and low voice. “You know, you're amazing with Ava. I don't know what I would have done tonight without you.”
You snuggle closer, a small smile playing on your lips. “She's a sweetheart! And besides, seeing you be a dad is pretty darn cute.” you whisper shyly.
He lets out a soft chuckle. “It's not always cute, you know? There are sleepless nights and mountains of undone laundry. But I swear, it's the most rewarding thing in the world.” He whispers as he looks at you sweetly.
A comfortable silence settles between you for a moment. Then, Charles takes a deep breath.
“Look, I know this might be crazy, but... it's late, and it's been a long day. Would you maybe consider staying the night? The guest room is all made up, and there's plenty of space on the couch if you'd prefer...” he says a little hesitant and even shy.
He trails off, waiting for your response. You turn in his arms, meeting his gaze. His eyes are full of hope, a hint of nervousness lingering in their depths.
You smile, a genuine warmth spreading through you. “Actually Charles... There was something I was thinking too...” You lean in closer, your lips brushing against his ear. “Maybe instead of the guest room or the couch, we could cuddle up in your bed and watch the rest of the movie? Movie-related cuddles, remember?” you whisper softly.
A slow grin spreads across Charles' face. He pulls you in for a kiss, deeper and more passionate than before. The movie fades into the background, the only sound your laughter and the promise of a night spent closer than ever before.
***
The movie credits roll, the sound barely registering over the soft snores coming from the baby monitor on the coffee table. You stretch languidly, the warmth of the blanket and Charles' arm wrapped around you making it hard to move.
He smiles sheepishly at you. “Wow, I don't know how we lost track of the movie. So much for brainpower, right?”
You chuckle, your eyes meeting his. There's a spark there, an unspoken invitation. “Maybe the movie wasn't that interesting after all. But hey, at least the company was good.” you smile playfully. “Oh, take this honey!” he says shyly and then walks over to a drawer and pulls out a soft, grey t-shirt. “This is probably a little big, but it's comfy! You're welcome to use any time you want.” he whispers.
You take the shirt, the fabric warm from his touch. It smells faintly of laundry detergent and something uniquely Charles.
“This is perfect, thank you Charlie! I think I can manage in a big, comfy t-shirt.” you giggle and smile.
He smiles back, his eyes holding yours. The air crackles with unspoken desire, the night stretching before you full of possibilities. He reach out to take your hand. “Then come on. Let's get you settled in, and maybe we can find a different kind of movie to watch... one that doesn't require a screen.”
He pulls you gently towards the hallway, his hand warm and strong in yours. Your heart races with a mix of excitement and nervousness. The hallway light casts a warm glow as you follow Charles. His hand remains clasped in yours, a silent invitation. You can practically feel the electricity crackling between you.
Reaching his bedroom door, Charles hesitates for a moment, then turns to you with a shy smile.
“Just a warning, my room might be a little messy, Ava has a habit of leaving her toys everywhere... So an apology if you find a colored build block or a stuffed animal on the floor.”
You squeeze his hand reassuringly. “Don't worry, I can handle a little mess, especially if it means more cuddles.” you say shyly.
He throws his head back and laughs, the sound warm and genuine. He pushes the door open, revealing a room that's undeniably lived-in. Clothes are scattered over a chair, a colourful build block and a stuffed bear lies abandoned on the floor. But amidst the slight disorder, there's a sense of warmth, safety and comfort in his bedroom.
He waves an apologetically hand at the mess. “Like I said... It's a little bit messy, but the bed it's made, at least.”
The bed dominates the room, a large king-size covered in a duvet the color of the sea, It looks impossibly inviting. You can't help but smile at the thought of spending the night snuggled up in it with Charles.
You smile. “The bed looks perfect. Thanks for offering the guest room, though. This is much more... spacious.”
He raises an eyebrow playfully while grinning. “Spacious enough for warm cuddles, I hope?”
You blush slightly, but hold his gaze. “We'll see about that, Mr. Leclerc... Now, where's the bathroom? I think I might need to change before those cuddles begin.” you say teasingly.
He points you in the right direction, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Take your time love, I'll be waiting... patiently... Although, no promises on how long that patience will last.” he giggled a little bit.
You wink at him before disappearing into the bathroom, your heart pounding with a mixture of excitement and anticipation. The night may not have gone according to plan, but it's turning into something far more special. The prospect of a night spent in Charles' bed cuddling, the promise of stolen kisses and whispered secrets, fills you with a happiness you haven't felt in a long time.
***
The bathroom door clicks shut behind you. You take a moment to splash some cool water on your face, trying to calm the nervous butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Slipping on Charles' oversized t-shirt, you steal a glance in the mirror. It hangs loosely on your frame, the scent of his laundry detergent clinging to the fabric.
Taking a deep breath, you step out of the bathroom. Charles is sprawled on the bed, the movie barely audible in the background. He glances up when you appear, a slow smile spreading across his face.
He smiles warmly at you. “Looking comfortable chérie. Ready for some more movie... or maybe something else?” (darling)
His eyes hold yours, the question hanging in the air. You walk towards the bed, a teasing smile playing on your lips. “Let's see what kind of mood this movie sets first. Maybe it'll inspire some cuddling, don't you think?”
He pats the space beside him on the bed, the duvet invitingly warm. You crawl in next to him, the familiar scent of his cologne filling your senses. He pulls the duvet over both of you, the space between you suddenly feeling too large.
As the movie plays on, you settle into Charles' side, your head resting comfortably on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around you, his touch sending shivers down your spine. You lose yourself in the quiet rhythm of his breathing and the steady beat of his heart against your ear.
The movie becomes a distant hum, the plot lines forgotten. You focus instead on the warmth radiating from Charles' body, the way his fingers gently brush against your arm. You steal a glance at him, his eyes already trained on you.
A slow smile spreads across your face. You lean in closer, your lips hovering a breath away from his. He closes the gap, the kiss soft and tender. It's a taste of what could be, a promise of something more.
You pull back, breathless.
“Maybe the movie can wait. How about we focus on some real-life entertainment?”
Charles chuckles, his voice a low rumble in his chest. “Sounds like a much better plan. Besides, I doubt this movie has anything on what we can do right here.” he said coquettishly.
He pulls you closer, his kisses becoming more insistent, more passionate. You melt into his touch, every thought of the movie forgotten. The only thing that matters now is the warmth of his body pressed against yours, the promise of a night spent tangled in his arms.
The movie plays on in the background, a silent observer to the unfolding scene. But neither of you cares. You're lost in your own world, a world of stolen glances, whispered secrets, and a growing intimacy that promises something truly special. As the night deepens, the movie fades into a distant memory, replaced by the intoxicating reality of a connection blooming under the soft glow of the bedside lamp.
You and Charles are caught in a heated embrace, the movie forgotten on the screen. The only sound is your own ragged breaths and the frantic pounding of your hearts. Just as Charles dips his head for another kiss, a faint sound pierces the air.
It's a whimper, barely audible, but unmistakable through the baby monitor nestled on the nightstand. You both freeze, pulled back from the brink of passion by the tiny sound.
Charles reaches over and turns up the volume on the monitor. The whimpers become clearer, accompanied by a soft snuffling sound.
“Sounds like Ava might be waking up...” he frowns slightly.
Disappointment flickers across his face, a mirror of your own feelings. You both know it's time to pull back, the night taking a different turn than anticipated.
You let out a soft sigh. “Maybe we should check on her, poor thing might be having a bad dream.”
Charles nods, a hint of frustration battling with his concern for his daughter. He leans in and gives you a quick peck on the lips.
He smiles apologetically. “Duty calls princess. Maybe we can pick this up where we left off later? After Ava's back to sleep, of course.”
You smile back, a touch of longing lingering in your eyes. “Of course darling, Ava comes first. But don't worry, I'm not going anywhere! Besides, a little mystery only adds to the fun, right?”
Charles lets out a soft laugh, the frustration melting away. He throws back the covers and gets out of bed, heading towards the door.
“You're right. Maybe this little detour will just make the reunion even sweeter. I'll be back soon babe.” he smiles.
He throws you a quick wink before disappearing down the hallway. You watch him go, a mix of disappointment and amusement swirling inside you. The night may not have gone exactly as planned, but the unexpected turn of events only adds to the growing connection you feel with Charles.
Settling back against the pillows, you pick up the remote and turn off the movie. The room falls silent, except for the faint hum of the baby monitor. You close your eyes, a smile playing on your lips. Maybe there's no need to rush things. After all, the best things in life often come when you least expect them.
***
You wait for Charles' return, the silence amplifying the soft hum of the baby monitor. Curiosity pulls you towards it, and you pick it up, placing the receiver near your ear. You hear the familiar sounds of Ava stirring in her sleep, little whimpers turning into soft murmurs.
Then, a gentle voice cuts through the static... It's Charles, his voice low and soothing as he speaks to his daughter.
“Hush little one, don't you cry, The moon is out, the stars are high. Close your eyes and drift away, Dreams of sunshine and flowers at play.” he sings softly through the monitor.
His voice washes over you, warm and comforting. You can picture him sitting on the edge of Ava's crib, rocking her gently as he sings. A pang of tenderness hits you, a glimpse into the protective and loving father Charles is. The whimpers gradually subside, replaced by the soft sounds of contented breathing. Charles speaks again, his voice barely a whisper.
“There you go, my little princess. Sleep tight, Daddy loves you so much.”
A lump forms in your throat. The tenderness in his voice sends shivers down your spine. You can't help but eavesdrop a little longer, yearning to be a part of this sweet moment.
After a few more minutes of silence, the bedroom door creaks open and Charles peeks in. He sees you with the baby monitor in hand, a soft smile gracing his lips.
“She's sound asleep, seems like my singing skills did the trick after all.” he whispers and smiles at you.
You blush, caught eavesdropping. You put the monitor back on the nightstand. “Guilty as charged... Your singing voice is impressive, Mr. Leclerc. Although, I'm not sure Ava fully appreciates your operatic skills yet.” you whisper softly and smiled at him.
He lets out a playful chuckle, walking towards the bed. “Maybe not... But, hey! At least she's asleep now.” he giggled. “Now... Where were we?” he whispers.
He reaches for you, his hand brushing against yours. You feel a warmth spread through you, the disappointment from before melting away.
“I believe we were about to explore some real-life entertainment. But this time, maybe with a little less noise... After all, we don't want to wake the princess again, do we?” you smile playfully.
Charles' smile widens, his eyes flickering with desire. He pulls you back into his arms, the promise of a stolen moment hanging heavy in the air.
The night may have taken a detour, but with Ava safely asleep and the connection between you growing stronger, it seems like a new chapter is about to begin. The adventure may be messy, filled with unexpected turns, but the prospect of exploring it with Charles fills you with a mix of excitement and anticipation. As you settle back into his embrace, you can't help but wonder where this unexpected journey will lead you both.
The soft glow of the bedside lamp casts a warm, intimate light on the scene as Charles pulls you back into his embrace. His touch is gentle yet insistent, his eyes sparkling with a mixture of amusement and desire.
He smiles and whispers again. “Absolutely not. Princess Ava deserves her beauty sleep... Besides, there are plenty of ways to have fun that don't involve waking the entire house.” He trails a finger down your arm, sending shivers dancing across your skin. You lean into his touch, a playful smile dancing on your lips.
“Oh, really? Do tell, Mr. Leclerc. Enlighten me on these... quieter forms of entertainment you have in mind.” you smile shyly while blushing.
Charles leans in close, his lips brushing against your ear. His voice is a low murmur, sending a delicious warmth through you.
“How about we explore each other, one slow touch at a time? See where the night takes us, without waking a single soul.” he whispers huskily.
His words ignite a spark within you, a thrilling mix of nervousness and excitement. You nod, your voice barely a whisper. “Sounds like a plan. But remember, we don't want to get too carried away. After all, Ava's room is just down the hall.”
A slow smile spreads across Charles' face. He tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his touch lingering.
He smiles shyly while blushing. “Don't worry bébé, I know how to control myself... to a certain extent. But trust me, this is going to be better than any movie we could watch... I promise.”
He dips his head for a kiss, this one slow and lingering. His lips move against yours, a delicious exploration that leaves you breathless. His hand trails down your back, sending shivers down your spine.
As the kiss deepens, you become acutely aware of the warmth of his body pressed against yours. The t-shirt you borrowed from him smells faintly of laundry detergent and something uniquely Charles, a scent that intoxicates you.
With a soft sigh, you pull away slightly, your heart pounding in your chest.
You say breathlessly. “Maybe we should start by turning off the light. A little darkness can add to the mystery, right amour?”
Charles lets out a low chuckle, the sound rich and warm. He reaches over and flicks off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into a comfortable darkness. The only light comes from the soft glow of the moon filtering through the window.
In the darkness, you feel Charles' hand find yours, his fingers intertwining with yours. It's a small gesture, but it sends a jolt of electricity through you.
He leans and whispers in your ear. “The night is young, and the possibilities are endless... Let's see where this adventure takes us.”
With that, he pulls you closer, his lips brushing against your neck. You know this is a path untrodden, a journey into uncharted territory. But with Charles by your side, the uncertainty is exhilarating. You close your eyes, surrendering to the moment, ready to explore the night and the deepening connection that binds you together.
***
The kiss breaks, leaving you breathless and wanting more. You rest your forehead against Charles' chest, your heart pounding a frantic rhythm against his ribs.
A moment of comfortable silence stretches between you. Then, Charles clears his throat, a hint of self-consciousness creeping into his voice.
“Listen babe, I just wanted to apologize. Maybe I came on a little strong there. It's just... well, it's been a while since I've had anyone in my bedroom, you know, other than Ava when she needs a middle-of-the-night cuddle or she has a fuss.” he mumble slightly.
He sounds embarrassed, the vulnerability in his voice a stark contrast to his earlier confidence. You reach up and cup his cheek, a sympathetic smile playing on your lips. “Hey, it's okay... I understand, It's been a while for me too. Besides, I don't blame you for getting a little carried away after that movie... or maybe it was the cuddles on the couch... Either way, there's no pressure. We can take things slow if that's what you want!” you smile again. “But honestly, your straightforwardness is kind of refreshing... No games, just genuine interest. And that's something I can appreciate.” you giggle softly.
A flicker of relief washes over Charles' face, followed by a slow smile.
“Really? You're not offended? Because honestly, the last thing I want to do is make you feel uncomfortable.” he sighs softly. “Slow sounds good, really good. But honestly, the thought of having you here all night, even if it's just for cuddles, is pretty darn amazing. It's been a long time since this place felt... well, alive.”
His words tug at your heartstrings. You understand the loneliness that comes with being a single parent, the longing for adult connection that can easily get overshadowed by the daily responsibilities.
You smile reassuringly. “Then consider yourself cuddled! Besides, I wouldn't want to leave you to face Ava's next potential night terror alone. Maybe I can even offer some expert advice on soothing a restless toddler. After all, I have a few nieces and nephews who keep me on my toes.”
Charles lets out a laugh, the sound warm and genuine. “Expert advice is always welcome, especially if it comes with a side of cuddles. Come here darling, just... Closer.”
He pulls you back into his arms, this time the embrace filled with a newfound tenderness. You rest your head on his shoulder, the sound of his heartbeat a comforting rhythm in the darkness.
The night may not have unfolded exactly as you planned, but as you settle into the warmth of Charles' embrace, you realize something unexpected... Sometimes, the best adventures are the ones that take you by surprise.
The night stretches before you, full of possibilities. There may not be any more passionate encounters, but the promise of a slow burn, a connection built on shared experiences and genuine connection, is far more enticing. You close your eyes, a contented sigh escaping your lips. You may not have gotten the fiery night you initially craved, but the prospect of a slow, sweet exploration with a charming single dad and his adorable daughter is a much more promising prospect.
#formula one x reader#charles leclerc imagine#f1 x you#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc fluff#charles x reader#charles leclerc#dad!charles leclerc#charles x you#charles!dad#charles single dad#single dad charles#mariclerc fics#✿ mariclerc masterlist#charles leclerc soft#charles leclerc soft smut
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you're gonna go far | 6
pairing: jake sully x neytiri x tsu'tey x fem!human! reader
summary: a scientist arrives on pandora (unwillingly) a year after the exile of the rda. now she must deal with the likes of a clan leader, a great warrior, and a thanator rider. . .
word count: 8.5k
read on AO3
It was a little difficult to get out of bed that morning.
One of those days.
Long and exhausting. It was challenging to get stuff done. You knew things like this wouldn’t just go away instantly. But you hoped that maybe…
It wasn’t too bad like before. You were able to think about the chores that had to be done later in the day and pushed yourself out of the bedroom.
So you went through most of the day barely existing. Norm was the first to notice your slight change in behavior because he began trying to joke more with you—no matter how bad they ended up being—and tried getting you out of your head. And you were thankful for that. At least that’s what was different this time around. You weren’t entirely alone nor held up in your room.
That was progress, right? You honestly couldn’t tell. Sometimes you felt like you were still stuck, that you weren’t moving forward. Or getting better. At least back to what you used to be.
Yet, you’ve been this way—asleep—for so long that you have forgotten what you used to be like. You forgot when the last time you smiled. You forgot when you felt the most happy or any other emotion besides anger and grief.
You wondered where that part of you went. Some days you went searching. Other days you somberly accepted that it was a part of you, that you were never going to get back.
At some point, you figured it died along with your mother.
“You want me to check on the baby today?” Norm asked you as you were getting ready for your link for the day.
You shook your head as you sat on the link bed, “No, I’ll be fine. Just one of those days, you know? We all have em’.”
He frowned when you shrugged it off or appeared a little too nonchalant about it, “Yeah, I guess.”
“Thanks for offering though.”
“Anytime, Doc.” He gave you a pat on the shoulder, while watching you particularly closely, “Just tell me you need a break. Don’t push yourself, okay?”
He was nice. You needed something like that.
Neytiri noticed it too.
While the two of you were in the garden that day, Neytiri had been saying words in Na’vi for you to repeat. And you did it, not perfectly of course, but you managed. It was just that you didn’t take in any information. Not in the way she knew you to.
You had a certain look that told Neytiri you were hanging onto her every word, whenever you were learning something new from her. Eyes slightly vibrant with curiosity.
That look wasn’t there today. Instead, in its place was a dullness and lifeless sort of unfocused gaze.
Your ears were low again.
Neytiri didn’t know when she became so attentive to your moods or facial expressions. So much so that she could tell when you were somewhat happy and really, painfully sad—
You were just easy to read in this form.
Yes, that was it.
“What is wrong, tanhi?” Neytiri eventually asked because she didn’t completely despise you so much to ignore your change in mood.
There was a twitch in your ears when you heard your name being called. You looked up from the newly planted mushroom seeds you had been mentally counting at Neytiri to find her staring at you expectantly. “Huh?”
She rolled her eyes, “You are not listening. I know you are distracted. What is wrong with you?”
You cringed at yourself for allowing yourself to get so distracted by your swimming thoughts. Drowning in them as usual. “It’s nothing. Just have a lot on my mind.”
But the answer did not satisfy her. Neytiri shook her head, “Sky People are always hiding their feelings. You are doing that. It is okay to be sad. It is natural.”
“I’m not hiding it—” You sighed, turning your gaze back to the mushroom seeds. “It’s just one of those days. Maybe—Maybe today I am sad. I could barely get out of bed and tomorrow it might be worse—what are you doing?”
You watched as Neytiri got up and moved behind you. A second later, you feel a brief tugging at your hair until it became loose from your short braid. “If you want to learn our ways, then you must take care of your hair. I look at it and it is a mess.”
“It was in a braid before…”
“I did not like it.”
With that, she got up again and trekked back into the forest. You watched her go in bewilderment at the sudden change of conversation and attitude from the Na’vi woman. You had no idea what had come over the woman or what made her suddenly leave, but you didn’t focus on it for too long. The confusion and startlement you had was enough energy to continue planting the rest of the mushrooms. You didn’t bother putting your hair back into a braid, not wanting to spend time threading through the thick strands until your fingers were too sore to complete your job. And the last thing you needed was something stopping you from finishing this one simple task—
A splash of cold water was suddenly dumped onto your head, leaving you soaking wet.
And terribly pissed.
You snapped your head behind you to find Neytiri placing the leaf down next to her—which was glistening with water. The same water that was now spilled all over you.
“Neytiri—ouch!”
“Hold still.” Neytiri hissed at you as she ran her long fingers through your hair.
You grumbled but reluctantly listened, still confused and a bit pissed at what was going on. And for a while, the two of you remained there. You, sitting on the ground still counting the seeds quietly to yourself while Neytiri stayed behind you. Braiding a few strands of hair.
It was then you realized just how different your hair was from the way it was in your human body. The hair length was very similar to how you used to wear it when you were a teenager. You wondered then just how old this avatar body was.
Once she was finally finished, she crouched down in front of you to get a better look. Her yellow irises scanning your face and her work. Tucking rebellious strands behind your ear, patting down some of the fuzziness, and making sure the braid was visible around your face.
You watched her quietly. And soon, when she was done obsessing over your hair, she watched you too.
It wasn’t the way you and Jake watched each other. This—this had something different about it.
Time was an illusion here. Trapped in her yellow gaze. You hadn’t realized you had been staring for so long—nor did you realize you had briefly glanced at her lips—until a sudden sound from the forest pulled the both of you out of this strange trance.
And once you snapped to your senses, your body quickly reacted. You shot to your feet and cleared your throat, “I gotta check on the avatar now.” You didn’t meet her gaze. “I’ll see you.”
Before she could stop you, you already scurried off. Stopping once you were far enough away out of her sight.
Stopping when you felt a new pair of eyes watching you rather closely.
You glanced around the forest surroundings as you approached the longhouse with a frown until your eyes locked on another pair of yellow eyes. Severe ones.
Tsu’tey was in the trees further away but enough for you to see him watching you, even when you caught him doing so. He did not look away from you. Narrowed eyes and that scowl resting on his angular face.
For a moment you wondered what the look was for. You wondered what he could yell at you about this time, even though you listened to his demands and had stayed away from the Omatikaya territory.
A scared part of you wondered if he had seen you and Neytiri just now.
Nothing happened. But still, it would give enough ammunition for him to verbally attack you. Hate you even more possibly.
Except there would be no battle today. As Tsu’tey disappeared within the trees without a word.
You were confused but relieved at the same time.
Dealing with an angry clan leader was not on your to-do list. Nor were you properly prepared for it.
After watching the trees in silence, you eventually went inside.
Neytiri watched your retreating figure with a frown, her heart…shifting—only a little bit as you disappeared. Her gaze then moved toward the trees, the area where the sound had come from before. And with an irritated frown, she got up and stalked toward the area.
They were still there. She could feel their eyes on her as she went further into the forest. With a hiss, she glared at the trees, “Come out. Enough hiding!”
Just a little bit above her, a few feet away a familiar warrior snaked out of the bushes and seated himself on the large branch with his usual expression he wore whenever he was away from their shared hut.
Neytiri frowned up at Tsu’tey, “You are watching me.”
“I am watching her.”
After a beat and a quiet sigh, Neytiri climbed up the tree and joined him. Despite his very sour mood, he tugged her close to his side as they sat together. On the branch, they had a good view of the Avatar Compound. A few dreamwalkers were running about but none of them seemed to bother Tsu’tey as much as you did. Neytiri could easily tell with how he kept glaring at the longhouse, the same place she always watched you disappear in whenever you left your false body.
“You have been spending time with her,” Tsu’tey stated more so than asking. There wasn’t much to hide, they both knew Neytiri spent some of her free time visiting you. Only when Tsu’tey or Jake are busy with their duties and she’s finished with hers before the both of them. “I do not like it.”
“She has done nothing.” Neytiri reasoned.
“Yet.”
“And what did I say if she does? I would kill her myself.”
As she said this, Neytiri felt a certain wavering in her heavy words. Like a part of her didn’t believe it anymore.
She rested her head on his shoulder, hugging his arm with a content sigh, “But I cannot ignore what the Great Mother has shown me. She has stopped my bow before and now she’s done it a second time. Do you not think it means something, yawne?”
In the corner of her, she watched as his jaw tightened, his features becoming particularly focused. “I do not trust this.”
“You do not trust the Great Mother?”
“That is not what I mean.” He corrected her calmly. Neytiri knew that Tsu’tey, like any other child of Eywa respected her and trusted in her signs. Always had. That was how he was raised. And she knew he wasn’t about to abandon that because of one demon.
But his words were still reluctant, “I do not know where our Great Mother is leading us. I do not know why she wants that demon spared—when she is just like the rest of them.”
Neytiri considered his words, “Perhaps she is like Jake—”
“There is only one Jake. And she is nothing like him.”
She made a sound of disagreement but didn’t push further on the subject. She noticed how tense he was, how tense he had been for the past week. She wondered then if he was truly upset by this or if there was something more to this quiet anger he so carefully restrained. Of course, his hatred for the Sky People was no question.
But Neytiri knew Tsu’tey.
Skin and bone. Heart and soul.
She knew her mate. Not only as a mate but as a friend. They had grown up together. Along with her sister, Sylwanin. There was nothing he could hide from her even if he tried.
“She may not be like Jake. But clearly, the Great Mother has chosen her for a reason. My mother even allows her to stay—I believe it is time you seek the answers.”
Tsu’tey scoffed but didn’t brush her off. Instead, he leaned in closer, allowing his hand to rest on her growing stomach. “You will be a great Tsahik.”
“Not as great as my mother. Nor my sister.”
Tsu’tey shook his head and cupped her cheek, “You will be great, my beautiful heart.”
A soft smile tugged at her lips only to falter when she noticed how exhausted he truly looked. How close he looked to breaking but hiding it. He could never hide it well from her. Nor Jake.
She then took his face in her hands and whispered soothingly, “What is it, my love?”
Knowing that there was no point in denying a response—knowing that Neytiri would not stop until she got what she wanted—Tsu’tey turned away from her to stare back at the compound.
“The Tipani clan are becoming reckless. They already do not like the Sky People that have stayed—but now that the demon has come, I worry they will begin to take matters into their own hands. I worry…that our clans will begin to clash.”
Neytiri took his hand in hers and pressed a gentle kiss onto his knuckles, “If it comes to it, I will stand by you. Jake will too. But I also will ask you to speak to our Great Mother about your troubles.” She caressed his exhausted lines with a small frown, “I worry for you, Tsu’tey. I do not want you to take on this task by yourself. You have Jake and I to be with you. That is why Eywa brought us together.”
Right then, he seemed to consider her words. His gaze was still unfocused while staring at the longhouse. A silence settled between them.
“Eywa has created this new path for us.” Tsu’tey mused. “Somedays I wonder if it will lead to something good in the end.”
“Do you think it won’t?”
He was silent. And Neytiri didn’t push.
When Tsu’tey went to the Vitraya Ramunong, the night had already settled around him. When he went to kneel at the tree, connecting his queue to one of the links, his prayers were silent. But his questions were clear. His intention was pure to the Great Mother.
What does it all mean? Guide me, All Mother.
So when a single atokirina flew away from the tree, Tsu’tey took to following it both out of curiosity and apprehension. The Great Mother’s answers weren’t always clear. If anything, her signs only led to more questions.
So, Tsu’tey wondered. He wondered if this would lead to any more answers.
Or just more unwanted questions.
Tsu’tey rushed through the forest, never losing sight of the spirit. He kept going and going until he was nearing the Sky People’s base. Until the trees suddenly became familiar. Until the grounds he had seen many times before unwillingly began to appear around him.
But his body never stopped moving. He never stopped following it. Too desperate for answers. Too desperate, too yearning.
Oh Eywa, he was yearning.
And then, and then, and then.
And then he was staring down at your still false body.
It was strange. Seeing no life in your face. Tsu’tey had only seen your false body from far away, but now seeing you up close. You looked so different yet the same as your human form.
Why was he here? Why did the spirit bring him to…
No.
No.
No.
His vision rippled. Your body morphed from your human form to your false body—impossible.
And then he woke up.
Awake.
Awake.
Awake.
Tsu’tey finally realized where he was. Instead of standing in the middle of the forest chasing an atokirina, instead of standing over your false body, he was back in his hut. With his mates sleeping next to him. With his son cuddled between both Jake and him. With Neytiri hugging his waist from behind.
A dream. It was only a dream.
But why you? Why you?
Why?
“Yawne?” Tsu’tey breathed out a sigh and looked over his shoulder to find Jake shifting out of his sleep, looking at him through heavy eyelids. He sat up a bit, careful not to disturb Neteyam’s sleep as he did, “Another nightmare?”
Tsu’tey hesitated—considered the question. The dream he just had. Was it a nightmare?
“No. I am fine. Go back to sleep, my love.”
Jake didn’t look entirely convinced but eventually lied back down. Usually, it took a while for Jake to fall asleep, so Tsu’tey lay back down, adjusting Neytiri’s arm around his waist and squeezing his other hand on Jake’s shoulder.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jake asked, his voice deep and sluggish.
Tsu’tey nodded, and tucked his nose into Neteyam’s cheek as gently as he could, “I am now.”
It took you a little longer to get out of bed the following week. But you managed. You watched a few more of your mother’s logs and even some of the other ones still in the system.
Dr. Augustine. Norm. Some guy named Quaritch. And then there was Jake Sully.
As a human.
You paused the video to examine his face. You suppose the traits matched his now blue form. The only difference was that instead of his longish dreads, he had a buzz cut in the video. And a tattoo poking out of his short sleeve shirt.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget his face for the time being.
You also tried not to think about the fact that Neytiri hadn’t been back for about a week now. Which was normal. You didn’t overthink it. Especially not after that moment—
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget your thoughts about her.
Then you remembered Tsu’tey. Him watching you so closely. You hoped he didn’t see you and Neytiri. Frankly, you weren’t sure what would happen if he did know.
He’d kill you. That’s for sure.
Eventually, you moved on, willing yourself to forget all three of them.
When you finally got out of bed, you continued with your regular schedule and tried to think of literally anything else. You tended to your garden by yourself and continued checking the baby.
There was a bit of determination for yourself, to keep moving. To not stay in one place any longer or else you’d be stuck.
And you weren’t sure if you’d make it out if you did.
Jake continued visiting the tank room whenever he could.
Today was one of them. Only this time you made it before he did.
“How’s the baby?”
You glanced up briefly from your notes, “Healthy. It might be because Na’vi babies might grow faster in pregnancy—judging by that we might have a couple more months before it’s born.”
Jake nodded, his face serious, “Anything else?”
For a brief second you didn’t respond, too caught up in your thoughts until you realized he had asked you a question. Jake tilted his head, brows furrowed at you.
You shook your head eventually, “No, everything’s all normal.”
He stared at the belly for a moment longer before he left. You were somewhat surprised at his quick retreat but didn’t think much about it. He was some type of great warrior, he was probably busy with something else in his clan. If it meant that the two of you didn’t have to interact much with him anymore or probably a lot shorter than before, then you were okay with it.
It seemed he finally took the hint.
All you could do was keep moving.
Jake came again the next day.
This time around you brought out the ultrasound.
He watched you and the machine intensely. You noticed and gave a sound close to a huff or a snort, “Nothing’s wrong with it. I’m just doing a thorough check-up today.”
A quick look of relief crossed his otherwise exhausted features, “Right, right, of course.”
Once you got the ultrasound running and connected to the avatar, you immediately found the heartbeat with the blurry image of the fetus appearing on the screen. It had grown considerably since the first time you saw it.
“There she is.” You mumbled mostly to yourself. The heartbeat was calming in a way, easing your usual tense muscles.
Jake perked up instantly, staring at you in disbelief, “She? It’s a girl?”
You glanced up at him briefly to find a soft expression on his face upon looking at the fetus. Neteyam—who you just noticed attached to his chest—sleepily snuggled closer to his father’s chest. When his head moved out of the sling, Jake held the back of his head, giving it support.
“Yes.” You gave a short nod.
Another look of relief flashed across his face, this time he didn’t try to hide it like before. A small smile tugged at his lips, “That’s—That’s nice. Amazing.”
In the corner of your eye, you watched him. That easy fatherly expression fell upon his face. How soft his smile was, for something that wasn’t even his. You weren’t sure what to think of it—no, you expected it. It was foreign. A father loving his child. To you at least.
You didn’t know your father. Nor did you have a father figure in your life. That type of love was unfamiliar to you.
Love itself was a foreign concept that you could not yet grasp. The only time you could truly say you experienced something close—similar to love—was with your mother.
And if love was like this—heavy. Leaving you…like this.
You weren’t sure you would want to experience any type of love ever again.
“You sure you’re ready to take on another?” You raised your brows, not looking up from the belly.
Jake looked at you, “Do you care for my answer?”
“I am watching over her. I suppose I should make sure she is left with somewhat tolerable parents—that is, if there aren’t any problems with her when she’s born.” You hummed, rolling your eyes at the sudden look of worry on his face. “Relax, that’s the standard check-up of any baby—well, I don’t know how different it will be compared to human ones.”
A beat went by before he finally answered, “I wouldn’t be honest if I said I wasn’t nervous. What new parent isn’t?”
“Mmm.”
The rest of the session was just the two of you, sitting in a somewhat comfortable silence. Comfortable for you because you were able to ignore him without any problems. And Jake wasn’t being too talkative or apologetic, which was a plus. But he was noticeably less hostile toward you as the time went by. Showing that he was taking the truce quite seriously and keeping his end of the bargain.
In other words, the truce was possibly the best option for you both. You could work in peace without being hammered or interrogated. And Jake would continue his visits without any problems.
You still didn’t like him. And you were sure the feelings were mutual.
But things were becoming easier.
And sometimes you like easy. Just as much as a challenge.
There was a part of him that was curious. Jake didn’t understand it. He didn’t understand Neytiri’s easy trust in you but it only made him more curious as he kept coming to see the baby.
Of course, you were guarded and curt around him. And he was quite the same but that didn’t mean he wasn’t at least a little bit interested in why you were so important to their deity.
So many questions.
A part of him wanted to ask Eywa himself—he wasn’t much used to praying to her but he would now and then out of respect for the People. If he asked, he would possibly gain an answer—which was incredibly rare—or he would gain more questions, which was the more common response.
So, Jake took to finding things out for himself. Even if it meant doing it the hard way. Even if it meant getting his head out of his ass and finally putting things into perspective.
Jake Sully was willing to at least keep this tolerable relationship with you going. Keeping this stable cord steady. You weren’t going anywhere anytime soon. It was time he had to get used to it. It was time for him to get over himself.
And he was willing to show that he did want something different. That he was ready to change, to finally understand you in a way.
But you still didn’t like him. Which was fine.
He didn’t like himself all that much either.
Another week went by and Neytiri still hadn’t come back. Surprisingly, you found yourself missing her. And when you began missing others, you got angry.
Since you didn’t feel like going through that process again, you resolved yourself to thinking that she must’ve gotten busy with her clan. Or grown tired of watching over you and your depressing personality once she realized that you weren’t a threat to her clan.
That must’ve been it. That’s what you chose to believe at that moment.
One day at a time.
You moved forward. Because you had to.
Throughout the week you focused on your work tending to the garden, checking on the baby, and even taking on more responsibilities around Hell’s Gate.
Sometimes you’d help Dr. Patel in the bio labs, other times you went with the other avatars to train your body. There were also days you would help Norm pack different human items he’d usually bring for the Na’vi children of the Omatikaya Clan. You, of course, never ventured too close to their territory whenever you went with him to drop off the items. You’d either stay in the ship you flew in or stay at the base as he left on his own.
Jake still kept coming around but his time there became shorter and shorter with each visit. Again, you didn’t bat an eye. You welcomed it and continued with your work.
Toward the end of your busy and long week, you woke up with a start when a blaring sound struck your room. It had to have been the middle of the night as you looked around frantically, only to realize the sound was coming from your tablet.
Quickly, you grabbed it to find the alarm was the system alerting you something was wrong.
And the problem was coming from the tank room.
You stumbled out of your bedroom and dashed through the long halls until you finally ended up in the tank room. Not caring that you were probably making a bunch of noise in the process.
When you got to Augustine’s tank, your heart sank when you found Grace’s avatar was violently twitching with the lights inside of the tank blaring a red.
“Fuck!” You hissed as you immediately checked for the problem.
The first thing you checked was the avatar itself. Her heart and the baby’s were fine but the avatar’s was slightly elevated, probably in response to whatever was happening to the machine which was the next thing you began to check.
There you discovered that something in it was malfunctioning. Throwing the liquid temperature off, the placentiums weren’t giving any more nutrients like they were supposed to. Whatever was going on, you didn’t have time to fix it or the machine.
If you wasted time like that more damage could be done and you weren’t going to risk that. Especially when the baby was in there. Especially when the baby could receive the worst of your mistake. Of this malfunction.
So, you worked fast.
You searched the room for an empty tank—which you were able to find and rolled it over next to the one Dr. Augustine’s avatar was in. You pulled the empty tank open just as Norm and a few other scientists entered.
“What happened?!” Norm questioned hastily.
Quickly, you jumped down from the empty tank and rushed toward Grace’s, “It’s malfunctioning. I don’t know why but we have to move her.”
Thankfully, Norm didn’t ask any more questions. He ordered the other scientists to help you.
You worked quickly. Draining the rest of the liquid from the tank, carefully moving the avatar—this required multiple hands—until you placed it in the new tank.
“Track her heart rate.” You ordered one of them.
A second later, a woman responded, “Stable but its body temperature’s dropping fast.”
By the time she said that you closed the tank. “Norm, fill it up.”
You jumped down, grabbed the heart monitor from the female scientist, and watched the lines closely. The tank was nearly filled up as Norm came up beside you.
Along with the heart monitor, your heart pounded through your ears as the tank finally filled up. You gave the monitor to Norm and went to adjust the temperature back to the usual settings.
When the blue lights came on it felt as if the room breathed a huge sigh of relief. You took the monitor back as Norm hummed, “Lucky you were the one to get here first. And quick thinking too—do you know what went wrong with the other one?”
The rest of the scientists poured out of the room as you slowly shook your head. “I don’t know. I couldn’t waste time, Spellman. Not when it could’ve risked the baby.”
Norm nodded and patted your shoulder, “You’re right. Good work, Doc.” He moved to the other side of the tank with a thoughtful expression. “You want me to stay and help with anything else?”
The lines on the monitor were stable, which brought you some sense of comfort. And yet the slight panic remained. “No, no. I’m good here. You can go back to bed. I’ll finish up here soon.”
“Okay.” Norm eventually moved toward the exit. “Get some sleep, Reeds. I’m serious.”
You nodded without looking at him. “Yeah, sure. Goodnight.”
“Good morning.” Norm corrected with a tired grin.
With that, Norm left. You breathed in a steady breath before grabbing a chair from the corner of the lab and sinking onto it. The monitor was kept nearby, the heart rate melodic in your ears as you set your tablet down on your lap.
For a while, you studied how far along the avatar was. It had been a good couple of months since you first discovered the child—which left her at about twenty-four to twenty-seven weeks at least. That’s not even counting when she first got pregnant. But compared to a human, the Na’vi pregnancy went by a lot faster, which also confirmed your theory.
Or maybe your perception of time was fucked up with how distracted and busy you had been.
Was that why the malfunction happened? Were you too distracted to notice any faults in the system during your usual sessions? What did happen?
You contemplated this for a while. Until your mind became hazy and your eyes droopy. At some point, you fell asleep next to the tank because there was no way you would leave the fetus’ side at that point. Not after all of that.
It felt as if your eyes had been closed for only a couple of seconds before you were suddenly jolted awake to find Norm standing over you.
“What happened? Is it the tank again?” You instantly asked, turning to check on the tank.
“No, no, no—the—she’s fine!” Norm quickly assured while easing you back into your chair. “I thought I told you to get some sleep.”
You stared at him for a beat, both a tired and an annoyed expression easily falling upon your face. “Well, I assure you I certainly wasn’t sitting with my eyes closed just then.”
Norm winced, “Sorry. I thought you’d want to get in your own bed before Jake gets here.” He rubbed the back of his neck as you got up from the chair. “I had to tell him what happened—he’s flying over now.”
“That’s fine.” You grumbled. “I can stand just one day in the same room with him. Besides, I should probably figure out what went wrong with that tank.”
Norm nodded, “Okay—uh, should I be a mediator for the both of you or..?”
“Oh, please.” You rolled your eyes. “It’s not like I’m meeting their clan leader.”
“You really need to try and get along with him.” Norm chuckled with a shake of his head.
You scowled, “Are you going to keep yapping in my ear about it or be useful?”
“Alright, alright, don’t an ass.” He strolled toward the doorway. “Jake’ll be here in fifteen.”
Once he left, you got to work again. You weren’t an official engineer but you knew a good amount of information from your training back on Earth. You hoisted yourself up and into the tank before you began taking it apart. You stood in it, trying to find out what exactly had gone wrong—while glancing at the heart monitor now and then.
Your brain was moving quickly yet hazily from the sleep. Eyes honed in on the mess of wires in front of you. So distracted by your silent questions and theories that you didn’t hear the incoming footsteps. Only the voice that followed after.
“What happened? Is she okay?”
“Yes, she’s fine.” You replied immediately, watching in the corner of your eye as he approached the new tank. His hair was tied back and across his chest was a leather strap that carried what looked like a machete. “It was just a malfunction with the tank. We were able to get her out before any real damage could be done.”
Jake frowned, “Malfunction? How the hell did you let that happen?!”
“Look, I don’t know.” You replied calmly, ignoring the twitch in your jaw. “I’m still trying to figure all that out. But she’s out of it and fine. Norm helped if that makes you feel better—”
“I thought you had things handled? What happened to that?” Jake scowled, his tone vicious.
“I do.”
“Then what the hell happened—”
“I already said I don’t know!” You seethed, glaring down at the group of wires now hanging from your hands. Somewhere in the back of your brain, you realized that Norm really did have to stand between the two of you. That this truce wasn’t stable enough. That the two of them were just too explosive. “The hell do you think I’m trying to do? Kill the baby?!”
You missed the way Jake’s face faltered slightly, catching himself. “No…No, that’s not what I—”
“Then get off my fucking dick!” You snapped, throwing a piece of the tank to the floor with a clatter.
All sound was gone from the room then.
This was the last thing you wanted to deal with. Being scolded like some child—like you already weren’t beating yourself up over this mess.
You sunk onto the floor of the tank and continued working. Because that’s what you were best at. Not conversations. Not people. Not love.
Work. It was everything to you.
Already you were mentally drowning Jake out, ignoring the fact that there was another person in the room with you. But eventually, you realized that there was nothing wrong with the wires. It must’ve been something else. Another theory down the drain.
Jake uttered your name at one point. And you ignored him.
There was a sigh followed by a short pause before he spoke, “I’m sorry.” You continued ignoring him. There was something about his apologies. You were just tired of them. “That wasn’t fair, you’re right. I shouldn’t have come at you like that—”
“Augustine’s avatar is over there.” You mumbled. “You can check on her yourself.”
There was another silence but you were too focused on what was in front of you to notice or care. You were so determined to ignore him and the sting in the corners of your eyes.
You didn’t like to cry. Especially in front of others.
Thankfully, you ignored him long enough until you realized you were finally alone.
After a while, you breathed out a tired sigh.
Fortunately, as the days went by there were no other problems with the new tank or baby, but it didn’t stop you from always double-checking everything after that close call. So much so that you didn’t realize how much sleep you were missing until Norm pulled you away from your work and forced you back into your room. Locked the door and everything just to make his point.
With the promise of Norm taking care of your work, you eventually allowed yourself to sleep for practically the entire day. Not without the tablet on the dresser next to your bed of course.
Even after catching up on some semblance of sleep, Norm still didn’t let you get back to your schedule right away. Which irritated you of course.
“I don’t want you in my garden, Spellman.”
He rolled his eyes, “And I don’t want you stressing yourself out. As your friend and colleague who happens to care about your well-being, I demand you stay away from the garden until you’re completely rested.”
You frowned at him, “We’re friends?”
“Shut up and accept my love.”
And he kept true to his word. Norm kept you away from the gardens, even the tank room. And made sure that the scientists knew how to keep you away as well. He covered all of his bases.
Damn him.
You couldn’t sit around and do nothing though. So, at some point you were so desperate you resorted to practically begging Norm to just give you something to do that would distract you throughout the whole day. You nagged and nagged and nagged until Norm finally gave in.
“There’s an old link shack north of Hell’s Gate. We’ve been thinking about restoring all of them around the area. But that particular shack’s connection is a little wonky. Maybe you could head over and restock the supplies with your avatar. Maybe even fix the connection while you’re at it.”
You nodded quickly, “Yeah, sure thing. I’ll get on that—”
“And don’t try to sneak your way to the gardens!” Norm added sternly, sending you a look over his shoulder while clicking away at his computer. “Plus, you won’t need the Samson ships. The shack’s not too far from here.”
With that, you went to grab supplies, such as med kits, weapons—one gun and a few stacks of ammo—blankets, Na’vi weapons, a hunting knife, and a bow with a few arrows. You kept the hunting knife to yourself just in case.
After getting all of this, you placed the bag of supplies in the compound longhouse where your avatar always slept when you weren’t linked. Once you got to your link bed and linked up with your avatar, you grabbed the hunting knife and the bag of supplies before taking off north from Hell’s Gate.
The sky was grey today with a few darker clouds on the horizon instead of the shimmering blue you were used to. A storm might’ve been coming.
Which meant you had to make this trip quick. There was no telling how bad these storms could get on this planet.
Similar to how you traveled through the forest with Neytiri, you took to the trees so that you’d have less of a chance of running into or disturbing any of Pandora’s finest. Hopefully, you had learned to be quiet enough to not draw any attention your way as well.
As time went by, the sky got darker. You followed the coordinates Norm gave you while slipping through the trees like the true shadow you were. Traveling and climbing through the trees got easier as you went. You had done it enough times with Neytiri that you knew what to do and how to do it. Albeit not perfectly, but enough to get by. Blending into the environment as best as you could.
You enjoyed it, the vibrant life and colors of the forest once again. Every time felt like you were taking in Pandora for the very first time. Every time felt like a huge breath of the freshest air. Here, you were weightless. You weren’t a scientist. You weren’t human. You weren’t an avatar. You were just were.
You existed here. You were real.
Truly this place was everything you dreamed of when you were younger.
Rain began to pour by the time you spotted the shack. It was propped up and well hidden in a large tree, with moss growing out of the sides, the entire thing looking like it hadn’t been used in a long time.
You slid down from a branch as quietly as you could and landed in front of the metal entrance. By the time you got the door open and crouched inside, you were soaking wet from the rain.
The shack itself wasn’t too small, which surprised you. It must’ve been made to allow avatars to be able to roam freely through here without too much trouble.
Once the door was closed, you sunk onto the empty cot in the corner of the shack and began unpacking the supplies. The med kit went into the cabinets above a wooden table attached to the wall. The blankets went on the cot. The gun and ammo went under the cot in a long black case filled with old and rusted weapons you had to throw out into the rain. You kept the hunting knife tucked in your shorts.
The rain kept going. It was relaxing. Stopping for a moment to listen. Smelling it through the cracked window next to the cot you sat on.
It was nice. You could stay here if you wanted. This could’ve been your new home if you didn’t have responsibilities at Hell’s Gate.
Lastly, you worked on the radio that sat on the wooden table—which you assumed was connected to the main base. So, for the next few minutes, you took your time messing with the radio. Listening to either ongoing static or barely audible voices going in and out. At some point, you messed with the wires a few times before Norm’s voice finally came through.
“Tomato. Tomato. Tomato.”
You pressed one of the buttons, “Hey, Norm.”
“Oh, Jesus! Reeds!” Norm startled. “Warn a guy next time!”
You pressed your lips into a thin line, “I just wanted to test if it worked. Clearly, I fixed it.”
A snap of thunder drew you away from the radio. Seemed like it was getting worse out there. You hadn’t realized how long you’d been out there until now.
Norm seemed to realize this too, “You gonna stay there and unlink?”
“Mmm.” You paused. “I’m gonna try bringing the avatar back.”
He sighed, “Alright, good luck.”
“Don’t need it.” You said as you got up. “I’m too awesome.”
“Whatever, Reeds.”
Another clap of thunder filled the air as you stepped out of the shack. Immediately you were soaked by how heavy the rain was.
Thunder continued to boom, making your skin jump every now and then. It was just terribly cold, making you start to run so that you could get out of it faster.
You ran and ran, and ran, and ran, and ran, only to realize just how much noise you were making and that the area was too unfamiliar to you. It wasn’t long until you realized how lost you were. It was just too dark to navigate your way back or recognize any familiar spots guiding your way.
With that in mind, you went toward the nearest tree and began to climb.
But your body was yanked away from the tree bark almost instantly as you were tackled down to the ground by a large weight. Your left shoulder exploded with vicious pain as if a bunch of sharp knives buried itself into your skin and continued to tear through it.
A strangled scream left your lips as the thunder clapped in the sky once more. You could barely see the creature but it was a dark, large beast. Digging further into your shoulder.
You hadn’t even seen it coming. You hadn’t been paying attention.
Now…
Now you might die because of it.
You tried shoving at it, managing to get most of its weight off of you. But the teeth were still in your shoulder. There was still pain. There was still warm liquid dripping down your arm.
When you moved your leg, you remembered the hunting knife in your shorts. Immediately, you dug into your pocket and found the handle instantly.
After that, you didn’t waste any time stabbing at it blindly and desperately. You did this, you kept going until more warm liquid covered your knife-wielding arm. You did this until the animal was limp against your body. Until you were able to push it off and scramble to your feet and run.
The pain was awful but bearable enough for you to run back to the shack at least. Mud was all over your clothes—some of it in your mouth. If anything, you probably looked insane right now.
You ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Ran. Way too clumsy to be quiet. What’s worse was you had no clue where you were. And there was more shuffling coming from the bushes and trees surrounding you. If anything, you were probably throwing yourself further into the lion’s den.
It wasn’t long until a black creature suddenly came out of the bushes in front of you, causing you to stumble to a stop as it made its way toward you. Sleek and dangerous. Eyes locked on you.
Thunder boomed again. An identical creature came out from your right. Another on your left. Another. And another. And another.
Until you were surrounded. Until you knew there was no way you were going to make it out of this.
You kept your knife in front of you, trying to ignore the pain in your shoulder, the warm liquid running down your arm, the shakiness in your legs. You began to wonder how much blood you were losing with your energy slowly dwindling as time went by—no, it didn’t matter.
Damn it, you weren’t going to die here! Not like this.
“Come on!” You hissed as you pointed the knife at them. “Come on!”
They growled at you, closing in. Finally, one of them pounced toward you. With the knife, you slashed at it. At that, the creature cringed away and missed you entirely but that didn’t mean the others were going to try their luck.
Out of instinct, you stumbled back as two more tried coming for you. Your back hit a tree as you yelled and swung your knife wildly at them.
Only neither the creature nor your blow landed.
The two creatures were thrown to the side as another clap of thunder struck your ears.
Another figure emerged from the trees and rushed toward you.
Instantly, you swung the knife, only for it to be caught in an iron grip.
You screamed.
“Hey, hey, easy!”
It took you only a couple of moments for you to register the words and that they were coming from a familiar avatar. The last person you ever expected to be here.
Jake lowered your arm with a hiss. You blinked as another round of thunder rattled your ears.
The creatures were closing in again. Jake turned his back to you, hissing at them. His larger arm stretched in front of you protectively when one of them got a little too close for his liking. The creature hissed back
You watched warily behind him, still clutching the dirtied knife. Both of you exhausted and animalistic. Yellow eyes glimmering. One with warning and the other with desperation.
Jake looked terrifying in this light. Just as murderous and dangerous as the animals that surrounded you.
You remained behind him, trembling but glaring. Gripping that knife like your life depended on it.
There was suddenly more shuffling, more thunder, and the creatures then scattered.
You, dumbfounded by this, spoke shakily, “Why did they—”
Jake grabbed your wrist holding the knife.
“We need to move.” He said, dragging you forward.
The two of you ran in the opposite direction of the creatures. He hauled you up a tree before climbing up himself. “Is there a link shack nearby?”
For a moment, you wondered how he knew about the link shacks. You leaned on a branch both to catch your breath and because the quick movements left you a bit dizzy. When you couldn’t come up with plausible answers to your silent question you instead said, “I just came back from one. North from here—I don’t know how far it is.”
Your body leaned a little too far. Jake was quick to grab you in his stronger, more stable arms as he pulled you away from falling off the edge, “Hey, hey, Reeds, I need you here with me, okay? Just stay awake long enough until we get to the shack and we’ll clean you up.”
“I’ve...I’m losing a lot of…” Blood. Blood was what you wanted to say. But the adrenalin was wearing out. Your shoulder throbbed horribly. Exhaustion weighed you down and placed inconvenient black spots in your vision.
“I know.” He draped your good arm over his shoulder and kept you upright. “I know, we’ll get there. I promise.”
There was no arguing with him. You were soaked to the bone and in a hell of a lot of pain. Going back to the shack was your best bet in this horrid weather.
Jake continued to support your weight as the two of you followed the same coordinates leading back to the shack—or rather you haze inaudible directions of what you could remember from the information Norm had given you while Jake haphazardly followed.
Thankfully, the rest of the way wasn’t a long journey. Or maybe you just kept blacking in and out along the way, you didn’t know.
Jake and you stumbled through the door of the shack. He closed the door while you made your way to the radio with whatever strength you had left.
“Norm.” You tapped the radio while wincing. The pain in your shoulder was getting worse. Before now you had been tolerating it. “Norm, can you hear me?”
The static went on.
“Storm must be messing with the signal,” Jake said from behind you as he rummaged through the shack. “We should stay here until the storm settles—”
You rested your head against the small table, the rest of his words becoming nothing but muffled noise to your ears. God, you’ve lost so much blood. And you were so tired.
For a moment, just for a few seconds, you wanted to sleep. Only for a moment.
“Reeds.”
A larger hand rested on the back of your neck, bringing you slightly out of your unconsciousness.
Jake kept calling your name. “Hey, where’s the med kits at? We need to work on your arm, okay? And I need you to stay awake. Can’t have you unlinking in this condition.”
Sluggishly, you nodded, “They’re in the cabinets.”
More thunder rolled by. Jake left your side briefly to search through the cabinets above you. You leaned back in your seat, staring bleakly up at the ceiling.
“How long do these storms last?” You asked.
The thunder responded with a clap.
sorry for the long wait! hopefully it was all worth the wait. another 8k chapter, yay, that wasn't difficult to write at all lol! but now jake and reeds are alone in a shack. anything could happen....
(i'm not adding anymore people anymore!)
taglist: @doggyteam2028 @bigbootahjudy @innercreationflower @n7cje @celi-xxmoon @readerofallthingss @sillyblues @squirtlebob @saturnhas82moons @1mawh0re @aprosiacperson @loserwithnofriends @garfieldsladybird @slutforsmut4ever @lik0
#jake sully#jake sully x reader#avatar jake sully x reader#avatar jake sully#avatar jake#avatar the way of water#neytiri avatar#neytiri x reader#neytiri x jake#neytiri sully#neytiri fanfiction#neytiri te tskaha mo'at'ite#dilf!jake sully x reader#dilf!jake sully#neytiri x y/n#jake sully x y/n#jake sully x you#jake sully x tsu'tey#tsu'tey x reader#tsu'tey avatar#tsu'tey imagine#tsu'tey te rongloa ateyitan#jeytiri#avatar 2009#atwow#[you’re gonna go far]
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Hi there :)
Can I request some headcanons about Xiao and Wanderer (separated) with an old s/o? Like, they've been together for decades, but reader is a mortal and they're not, therefore they don't have many years left to live now that they're in their 80s. I would like something sweet but feel free to add some angst in it.
HI ANON TY FOR YOUR ASK! Ok so I’m literally goiNG TO CRY because I actually purposely make my own self insert immortal because this makes me so depressed but dw I will make it a fluffy happy ending. I would be unwell if I didn’t make it a happy ending LMAO
[Fluff + Slight Angst] [Xiao/Wanderer x Reader] Mortals
CONTENT
Fluff, some angst, gender neutral reader, HAPPY ENDING WOO, CHARACTERS ARE 18+
XIAO has been alive for longer than he can genuinely remember and most of it was spent suffering alone. He’s scarred so deeply that even until the end of time, the marks will never fade. He can’t get rid of his past but you came along and he realized he could at least start to heal from the centuries of pain. Your time together has been the best years of his life and it makes his heart ache to think that you’re about to come and go before even living for a fraction of his life. He’s watched your mortal body age but he still thinks knows that you’re the prettiest thing he’ll ever encounter. Xiao has always treated his time with you like it was limited, even when you were younger. He’s been getting desperate recently though, your body has slowed down, and you’re well into your elderly years. He’s always wanted to ask you if he and Zhongli could help you with this, return you to your younger body and help you live forever. But, he thought it would hurt you. Immortality is more of a curse than a blessing and he of all people should know that. But as your health deteriorated, he started to plan how to ask you without pressuring you. Honestly, when he finally brought it up, you giggled at him and said “I didn’t even know you could do that.” He blinked as he realized how much time had passed and how he really had been avoiding it all these years. It was just somewhat unfathomable to a 2000 year old being that all these fun years with you had already been a few decades. He explains why he felt bad suggesting it, but you quickly comforted him and thanked him for even bringing it up. You said you needed some time to think about it but you knew that you wanted more time with your beloved. It’s near impossible for most people to find their soulmate and so since you found yours, you wanted to somewhat selfishly hold onto him as long as you could. Of course he secretly felt the same though. Your time together might end soon as the traveller discovers the underlying mysteries of the world or it could end millenia later. Either way, you knew you’d be able to face it, together.
WANDERER has been through so much over the past few centuries of his life and he’s believed his emotions have been so useless to him as he isn’t even human. His suffering, pain, and desire never made sense because he always lacked a heart. He thought he’d be doomed to this forever until he met you. You breathed life into his mechanical body and into his new anemo vision heart. He felt truly alive with you, it was like he was freshly born as a real man when you came into his life. He took a while to properly warm up to you before he could express himself in a healthy way but you always had the patience for him. The problem was that he couldn’t have the same patience, not because he wasn’t a healthy partner, but because your life had a definite end. He was impatient because he couldn’t lose you and he didn’t know what else to do. He consulted Nahida/his mom about it and she suggested using his body as a template to create a body for you. One that would last forever with him. He was immediately overjoyed to hear that there was hope and he almost forgot to consider that you might not want to live forever. He probably tries to gauge if you would want to by prodding you with small questions but you see straight through him. You know something’s up, and you tell him that you know there’s enough trust between you two for either of you to speak freely. So he does. You take some time to debate it and decide to do it because even if at some point you can’t take it, you’d talk to him about it and come up with a solution (but you doubt that'll come up <3). There was a lot going on in Teyvat at the moment but just knowing that you’d have more time gave both of you peace. He was worried that afterwards you might not be the same, and that you might become emotionally hollow. But you knew that with him there, you’d never feel any less alive. Even without your physical body, you both had your souls, and it was all you’d ever need.
Thank you for reading!
|| MASTERLIST <3 ||
#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#genshin fluff#genshin angst#genshin impact fluff#xiao x reader#xiao fluff#xiao angst#wanderer x reader#wanderer fluff#wanderer angst#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche fluff#scaramouche angst#my asks <3#j's silly ramblings
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Love & Mischief
Loki x Female!Reader
Rating: M (Mature)
Warnings: There's nothing explicit, some allusions to sex, probably language, violence, and heavy descriptions of grief and loss, although there is somewhat of a happy ending.
Word count: About 2.9k
Synopsis: You're Asgard's goddess of love and loyalty, but you've lost your god of mischief, how do you move forward?
Author’s note: This is set in Thor Love and Thunder. Also if you've ever seen the last scene of the show Reign, it has an inspiration in this fic too. I've had a lot of grief and loss in my life lately and this felt very therapeutic to write. I've tried writing for Loki a couple of times but always chickened out, so I really hope y'all enjoy this and hopefully there will be more to come!
I am no longer using a taglist! Instead if you would like to be notified when I post new fics follow my side blog @jo-writes-fanfic and turn your post notifications on!
“And what are you the goddess of?”
The words resounded in your head again and again and again.
When Hela said those words to you, years ago, you had fired back, so sure of yourself and your role in Asgard, your role in your life, your role in his life.
But now…
What was a goddess of loyalty and love who no longer had love? Who no longer believed in such things as fate and security in love?
Your powers should have died when he did.
It was an odd pairing to many, you knew. But it worked perfectly, your strengths and weaknesses worked in tandem and created a love worth fighting for.
But the fight was gone.
The god of mischief (and betrayal- some would argue) and the goddess of loyalty and love were a match made in Valhalla.
Until he was gone, ripped from you so violently that you still woke up screaming from nightmares regularly.
You sat next to your king in New Asgard during another security council meeting.
You were completely zoned out, thinking of bright blue-green eyes, dark curls, and a blade-thin smile. Valkyrie nudged you. “Hey, tone it down, you're bumming out the whole room,” she whispered.
You sighed and blinked out of your reverie, and finally noticed that the mood of the room, despite the recent good news that had been received (you can’t remember what it was - honestly, you forgot to pay attention, these meetings were very dull and tended to drone on) was altogether glum.
“Sorry,” you whispered back and reigned your mood in.
Normally, your powers were extremely helpful; tightening the bonds of loyalty in those around you, increasing love in both romantic and familial bonds, reading others moods - often influencing them, and sometimes even manipulating loyalties. But currently, drowning in grief as you had been the past several years, your powers were more of a burden than anything.
The heaviness in the room instantly lightened, and the conversation flowed in a more productive direction once more.
“We need to talk about these moods of yours,” Val said once she was satisfied that the meeting was going better.
“No thanks,” you grumbled, and promptly zoned out once more. You really preferred it when Thor was also a mess, before he got his shit together, and you weren’t the only one that hadn’t moved on from the repercussions of the war with Thanos. But you know what they say, misery loves company. And back then, no one nagged you as much to get your shit together.
“A little help here?” the king asked you, irritation in her tone.
Another disagreement had broken out, this time a fist fight. Honestly, you found it amusing and were inclined to let it go on for a while, but when Val glared at you, you stood up and clapped once.
Everyone stopped their movements immediately and looked up at you.
“Enough,” you said sternly. “Asgard, though we may have differing opinions, we all fight for the same thing, the prospering of New Asgard. Remember that,” you ordered, infusing the room with compliance, reminding them of their bonds of loyalty.
Everyone looked sheepish and sat back down.
You flourished a hand to Val and said, “My king,” giving her the floor.
She gave them all a rousing speech, it was honestly quite good, some of her best work, and then ended the dreadful meeting early, much to your relief.
“Good job, boss. Well, I’m off-”
“Not so fast,” she said as she caught your arm.
You sighed once again.
“Do we need to talk about this? About Lo-”
“Don’t say his name,” you hissed and the tension in the room raised significantly as your anger and grief filled the space, making the large room feel claustrophobic.
She sighed and took your hand.
“Look, I can’t pretend to know what you’re going through and what you’ve lost. We can all feel it from time to time and I know it’s an incredibly heavy burden. I’m just concerned for you and want to help you,” she said.
With tears in your eyes, you nodded.
“I’m concerned about me too,” you mumbled.
“What can I do to help? Tell me. Anything,” she practically begged.
“Nothing, unless you can drag him back from Valhalla,” you muttered and brushed past her.
And life continued to trudge forward. As a goddess, never had such a short amount of years felt so long, an eternity really.
You felt as if you were stuck in a time loop and every day was close to the same.
You woke up and for a split second forgot he was gone and reached across your bed to find it cold. Then, a wave of grief hit you that was so heavy, each and every time, that you forgot how to breathe.
Eventually you forced yourself out of bed, shoved some food in your mouth as you rushed out the door and met Valkyrie for early morning training. Then you usually sat by the sea and stared as the sun rose in the sky, thinking of him but trying so hard not to. And again, you forced yourself on.
You completed your daily tasks as the King’s right hand goddess; meetings, meetings, and more meetings usually. Most nights you sat at the bar, watched Valkyrie drink an ungodly amount, then when you got bored enough you walked through New Asgard.
You walked and walked, thinking if you moved enough, if you stayed ahead of your sadness, maybe it wouldn’t catch you in the morning.
It always did.
Rinse and repeat.
There were differences of course, sometimes, you had to leave New Asgard to do the whole ambassador thing. Occasionally Thor came to visit and brought along his various cohorts and problems.
Today was one of those days. You were improving in your hand to hand combat skills, according to your King, through your daily rigorous training sessions, which pleased you since you spent most days feeling like you wanted to fight the whole nine realms. And then, following your routine, you sat on the cliffside and stared at the sea.
You never even got to give him a proper funeral, you thought, which then made you think of Frigga and the beautiful funeral service for her that you had watched through tears.
A voice called your name, you looked back and for a moment, a blink and you miss it moment, you saw him. A flash of green-blue eyes and inky black hair, your heart skipped a beat and the vision was gone.
You shook your head in an attempt to clear it, honestly these flashes of him you’ve been having lately should be concerning, but instead you clung to them, desperate for any connection to him that you could get.
Although the true sight before you was one that made you smile, as Thor came up and wrapped you in a bear hug.
You wheezed and when he finally put you down he chuckled heartily.
“How are you?” he asked and you gave him a look like he should know the answer to that question.
“Well I have something that should cheer you right up,” he said as he steered you back towards the town.
“Does it involve needing my help to fight another dangerous life-threatening bad guy?” you asked wryly.
“Perhaps….” he said.
You huffed a laugh and said, “I’m in.”
The threat you were fighting turned out to be a whole lot more dangerous and life-threatening than you anticipated.
Which is how you found yourself on a ship with Thor, Jane, Valkyrie, and Korg on an unfortunate adventure to confront the God Butcher.
Watching Thor and Jane fall back in love was not doing much for your mood. Val handed you another drink and you downed it.
“Hey, hey, you’re totally bringing down the vibe, mate. This is supposed to be about love,” Korg said to you. You huffed and rolled your eyes.
You made an effort to lessen the dark cloud you’d brought on the ship.
“Do you think you’ll ever find love again?” Val asked you, after she confessed that she’d avoided any serious relationships for decades.
“No,” you said, like it was final.
“Really?” Korg asked. “Shouldn’t the goddess of love fall in love easily?”
You shot him a glare.
“I love. I love a great many people. But true love, like soulmates and shit, that only comes once in a lifetime. And after you’ve had it, you’re pretty much ruined for anything less. So no, I don’t think I’ll ever truly find love again,” you said with a sigh.
“Heavy,” he replied and you cracked up.
You laughed so hard you snorted, and at first your friends looked at you in shock, then joined you in laughter, and the room filled with love once again, the love of friendship, and you realized you’ve been overlooking the amount of love you actually had in your life due to your grief.
You grabbed Val’s hand and patted Korg’s disembodied head, and watched Thor and Jane reignite their flame of love.
“I love you all and am grateful for all the support you’ve given me,” you said.
“No final confessions,” Valkyrie said, “this is not the end for any of us.”
You nodded and then the ship reached its destination. The shadow realm yawned open in front of your vision and you gulped.
You had this horrible feeling, like dread, in the pit of your stomach, and you saw him again. That flash you’ve seen so many times recently, but more and more frequently since this misadventure started and that dread molted in your stomach into resolve.
You were certain and you were ready.
Of course the plan went immediately sideways. You crossed swords with Gorr the God Butcher and your heart threatened to pound out of your chest.
Yes, your sword fighting skills had improved, but not enough to be a good match for a seasoned warrior and god killer.
“What are you the Goddess of? Are you even worth my sword?” he growled out.
You gritted your teeth and went on the attack. Your rage filled the space as you dodged, slashed, and pushed him as hard as you could.
You could hear your friends yelling, but you couldn’t lose your focus even for a moment as he pushed back and fought with skill beyond your own.
And you realized you’d been doing this all wrong. You were fighting without your biggest asset, your own natural gifts and abilities. The powers that made you a goddess of Asgard.
He didn’t notice your impact on his mood because your rage didn’t even touch the deep well of his own, he didn’t feel your rage due to the mountain that was his own.
No, rage wouldn’t work, you thought, and as your swords crossed again you used your other hand to grab his.
Your power was more potent when you were skin to skin.
You poured love and loyalty into your enemy, thinking only of happiness and good memories, trying to lessen his rage. Trying to decrease his fight, hoping to convince him to put down his sword.
Your breath caught into a gasp as his emotions infected your own. His love and loyalty were intertwined with an ocean of grief. Just like your own.
And you were drowning.
His emotions, his rage at the injustice and unfairness and unending sadness felt so close to your own emotions that you were thrown back into a memory.
Your worst memory, actually, the day you lost him for good. And you knew your enemy was in his worst memory as well. The origin of his grief.
Just like you watched the origin of your grief as it unfolded in front of you once more. The reason for your nightmares, the reason you woke up screaming, you stepped back and gasped as the memory overcame you.
And Gorr did the same.
You think the sound might be the worst part. Loki’s choking. Or maybe it was the snapping sound, like a branch, a snap that ended everything for him. And for you.
And then there’s the sight. You couldn’t even describe it, it was too awful to explain. You’ve never spoken about it, even in the therapy sessions your King forced you to attend.
He thudded to the ground and you gasped as the vision cleared.
You were drowning in your own grief and it was clear Gorr was more accustomed to drowning than you.
He recovered one second quicker, and your battlefield reflexes were not quite up to par.
You slashed your sword up but all it did was clang against his where it was embedded in your stomach.
All the air whooshed from your lungs.
“You are not a god that deserves death, are you?” he said as he cocked his head. “But you lost faith in yourself, in what you stand for.”
You weren’t even sure you felt the pain. Maybe the shock inhibited your ability to feel any pain. You’d been injured before, sure, but you always felt the sharpness of it. But of course you’ve never been hurt this severely.
You tried to speak, but it came out as a groan.
“I am sorry,” he said and slowly slid the sword from your abdomen and you fell to your knees. Blood gushed and you saw that flash again.
“Beautiful,” you mumbled as you saw the flash of a wry smirk, eyes full of love, and a hand outstretched towards you. Beckoning you.
Finally, you thought.
The last thing you heard was Thor roaring and your king calling your name as she caught you before your body hit the ground.
There was darkness, utter darkness, and then a solid weight beneath you.
You realized you were laying down. You were laying on the most comfortable bed you’d ever had the pleasure of sleeping on.
Sleeping? Are you sleeping? Wasn’t there something…something painful? You couldn’t remember.
You blinked your eyes open and let out all the air in your lungs.
Your eyes filled with tears, this time happy tears. For the first time in what felt like an eternity, you cried happy tears.
Loki laid beside you, close enough for you to touch, staring at you with such love in his eyes that tears spilled down your cheeks.
“Oh,” you gasped.
He reached out and cupped your cheek, wiping the tears away.
You sobbed, and he shushed you even as he pulled you closer. You buried your face in his bare chest and he crushed you against him, so tight, tight enough that you were sure he would never let you go again.
He ran his hand up and down your back, and with a start you realized you were void of clothes as well.
You awoke in the afterlife just as you would have every day of the best years of your life with him; naked in his bed after a night of making love with adoration in his eyes as he watched you sleep.
You took a shuddering breath and pulled back to look at him in the eyes once more, your hands never leaving his body, you ran them up his chest, across his face, twirled your fingers in his hair.
“This is Valhalla, isn’t it?” you asked.
“Yes, my love,” he said, and kissed the fresh tears on your cheeks away.
Then he kissed your lips. It was a delicate thing at first, but then it molted and grew until it felt exactly like it used to. The kiss cemented you to him, secured you right where you should be, where he had been waiting for you.
And all of the pain you experienced before that kiss didn’t even matter anymore. Because you loved him and he loved you, and that’s all.
His lips moved against yours and your tears mixed with his and it was perfect. You loved him, that’s all.
You weren’t angry at him for dying and leaving you alone. You weren’t drowning in heavy emotions anymore. You held no grudges or hard feelings over anyone or anything anymore, not now that you were in the arms of your greatest love once more.
“It’s been so long,” you gasped out when he pulled back and smiled.
“I know,” he said with a small smile.
“I’m sorry,” you said.
“I am as well,” he replied, simply and sweetly.
You felt light as a feather. You felt released from your pain and anguish. You were with him again, and that’s all that mattered.
“Isn’t the introduction to Valhalla traditionally supposed to be much different?” you asked.
He smirked and mischief twinkled in his eyes, “It is possible I managed to bend some rules for you.”
You huffed a laugh and pulled him into another kiss. One that could’ve lasted seconds or could’ve lasted a lifetime. It didn’t really matter. You had eternity in the hall of warriors with your Loki, and you were secure knowing you died fighting for the ones you loved.
“Would you like me to give you the grand tour?” he whispered in your ear as he pulled back from your lips and began kissing his way across your skin.
“Maybe later,” you said as you wrapped your arms around him and pulled him atop of you.
“We have an eternity,” he promised and kissed you, slow and deep.
Tagging those who showed interest in this fic (thanks for the support!) : @thespiralstaircasewriter @bellaisasleep @elly-hiddlesherloki @izhunny @drachenkinder @spacefloosie
#loki#loki x reader#loki x you#loki x y/n#loki laufeyson#loki laufesyon x reader#loki imagine#loki odinson#loki friggason#loki angst
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🔞🌃Nights (Adult!SatoSugu x Fem!Reader)🌃🔞
A/N: This is a short smut piece, serving as the follow-up to Moving Day.
CW: MATURE 18+ CONTENT INSIDE. NSFW, P in V, P in ass, double penetration, MMF, threesome, throuple, polyamory, short smut.
I'm no master at writing smut so sorry if it's not longer and stuff but writing short pieces means more often posts.
All credit for the characters/show goes to Gege sensei.
* Please DON'T plagarize, translate, or repost my FANFIC content. Reblog, like, and follow instead.
I hope whoever reads this enjoys.
Gojo boastfully laughed as he regaled with tales of pissing off the stingy higher ups, Geto whisking his drink about in his hand with a wry grin and invested eyes, and you sitting in between them.
Sushi dinner with your two loves. What a way to celebrate this newest chapter in all your lives.
You resting your face in your folded arms as their banter rang richly to your ears, lulled by their shared warmth. Feeling cozy, at ease, and entranced in ways you didn't think you'd ever receive. With them, it was like you three were in your own little world.
It had gotten late. Leaving the sushi joint with leftovers in bags, you three were heartily full, light-headed and happy. Driving back home in your five seated cozy car with Geto at the wheel. Gojo leaned his head back in the passenger seat while you kissed them both on the cheek, making small talk with Geto while Gojo zoned out to nap.
Honestly … you felt on top of the world.
Like right now.
In the comfort of your newly shared bedroom.
As your soaking cunt gobbled up Geto's shaft with such ease as he lowered you down slowly enough to slide it in; his giant hands squeezing you from your hips to your thighs.
"Fuck~" His raven hair fanned out beneath him, panting heavily already. "Honey, you are heaven sent~" Geto's lovesick smile made your bud tingle at his girth stuffing.
"Aaah~!" Your erotic moan made Geto swell up even further. His cheeks turned more red, sweat trailed down his enamored face and his flexing muscles; his veins popping out in the process.
Scratching your nails down Geto's ribs elicited rough hisses from him that made you carefully lay down atop him so you could smooch him. "Sugu~" Your shortened nickname for him made Geto smile further as he opened his mouth to let you two French kiss sloppily.
The moment you felt Gojo's lean warm presence lay atop your back, his girth throbbed as he jerked off in his hand whilst rubbing his dripping head in between your peaches.
"Nngh!" Geto grinded his hips forward just to get friction stroking his balls against Gojo's.
"Mmph!" Your lips broke off, head reeling as your arse swayed in the air, just begging to have Gojo's girth stretch you out. And that's what he did, your scorching wet caverns sucking him up just as greedily. "Ha – Aah … Toru~" Your shortened nickname for him, panting needily, had his hips jolting into yours, kneading your cheeks roughly, leaving scratch marks in their wake.
"Fuuuck~! Tight as ever, sweetie~ You've really missed me, huh~?" His head plopped down on your back as his hand fondled your right tit from behind simultaneously with Geto massaging your left tit.
"Missed us both, honestly~" Geto drawled, flitting his tongue along your neck, suckling your collar bone, grinning at the red welt marks now imprinting you. "The feeling's mutual~"
With Suguru's left hand gripping your right hip, and Satoru's own left hand grabbing your left hip, you felt somewhat anchored through your heated mindset. Your hands dug into Geto's broad shoulders for steadiness, your hips rotated upwards as they together lifted you up only to pull you down to take them in further, striking every nerve ending ingrained inside.
When they thrusted upwards, you jolted forward. When they pulled back, your walls fluttered, squeezing their cocks desperately.
This addicting pattern was quickly escalating as neither man was not even close to fully truly releasing. And so, their now frenetic rhythm had you a moaning yelling mess as familiarity of times before began racing through your memory. Them pounding into your soaking tightness specifically.
"God, this feels right~!" Gojo buried his face in your neck, kissing and biting you insistently enough to leave marks as much as possible in every inch of skin there. "So fuckin hot~!"
Geto took in a mouthful of your bountiful breast that he was just twisting your nub with his fingers, now tracing patterns with his sizzling tongue as he nibbled on your bud starvingly, his lips curling on both ends up at you. "Agreed~ Such a fine tasting angel~"
God, their teething, their burning mouths, their firm-built hands fondling and rubbing your skin, everything drove you up the wall. Their touch. Their taste. And you wouldn't have it any other way.
Dopamine jutted through all three of you.
FWOP!
Pushing yourself off Geto as you raised your hips frenzy in tune with them pulling away just as swiftly.
FWOP!
Only to SLAM yourself down on them both, earning lustful swearing yells from them, amorously smiling looking at their squeezing eyed, panting, sweating flushed beauty. Up and down you went, rewarding you with unreasonable pleasure and their deep enriching symphony of moaning.
"Horny little lady~" Gojo hissed as his hand released your abused red boob to grab your chin and turn you around enough to kiss you savagely; your surprised mewls mingling with his growls as he won supreme exploring every inch of your mouth.
SCHLICK!
Pulling your hands off his shoulders to intertwine with his, the squelched sounds of Geto popping out your breast heard loud and clear; a line of drool connected his tongue to your drool covered hill as he pushed up on his elbows, dark lust coating his eyes. "Satoru, let me take the lead here."
"Aw~! But taking her from behind is heaven~!" Gojo's whine as he parted from your swollen slick mouth was accentuated by thrusting in one fast thrust up said ass, having your loud squealing self lean back against his front; your horny tongue out expression had their dicks twitching.
"So is this." Geto's devious smirk was your only warning as he quickly pushed off the bed, situating yourself straddling him, when his hand released yours to grab your right thigh and heaved it high enough and far apart to stretch your pussy to go with another angle had you crying out. "Well~?"
Pulling your left thigh enough apart to drape over his hip from behind, Gojo followed his lead, earning him the same result, seeing your wanton crying self hugging Geto around the neck.
"Huh … not bad Suguru~" Gojo chuckled before leaning over your curling whimpering self to kiss Geto deeply.
"I try~ Now Satoru, shall we~?"
"W – wait~!" Your breathless plea had both men watching and amazed that you turned around to tug on Gojo's black blindfold, pulling it off to let his hair down and his eyes be free. "Beautiful~"
Gojo blushed darker, his heart felt struck harder by Cupid's arrow, and his eyes brightened with unbridled love before he kissed you his thanks, smiling cheekily as he rubbed noses with you. "Kawaii~!"
Holding your legs up from under the knees in one hand, lifting you higher off the bed, you were blown away by their sheer strength electrifying your nerves in this new angle, taking turns thrusting in and out, tugging your legs further apart in tune to their spasming pegs.
Burying your face in Geto's thick neck as your boobs aligned against his boob like pecs, you chewed on them luscious builds before biting hard enough to leave teeth marks. "Goddess~!" Geto gushed, dazedly smiling at you marking him as yours.
Shaking the bed insistently enough had the headboard smacking the wall a lot as one slid in and the other slid out, shaking you back and forth between them as they sucked and bit every inch of you they could reach, further claiming you.
The cacophony of profane, raunchy yells and screams served as the melodies to your ears, bouncing off the walls from the overwhelming sensations rendering you unable to spot when blue and brown gazes made eye contact.
Both slid out until only their tips remained inside. Then they struck in unison. Your tender flesh stretched to its limits until they reached that right spot. You then saw blinding white, popping off Geto's pec to breathlessly gasp. Your cunt and a-hole slick and swollen enough for another double pining.
Grinding as one, their composure long lost, all that mattered now was carnal release. Your breath hitched at the overwhelming high, your nails dragging down Geto's back; his pained growl giving you goosebumps before devouring your open mouth, swallowing your cries.
Blood rushed to your core chaotically. The air between you all got so smothering hot, difficult to breathe calmly. You barely able to pull free from Geto's swollen wet mouth before Gojo's head swerved around to entrap you in a deep tongue fuck.
Your hair stuck to your forehead, gleaming from sweat, you were losing composure. You felt muscles tighten as you were literally pressed in between their built chests, bruising left on your knees from their grip digging in painfully.
"T – Toru! S – Sugu! I – I'm – !" You struggled to utter against Gojo's perfect lips as you felt yourself about to reach the precipice.
"S – Same! Sh – Shit!" Gojo gritted through his teeth before going back to sucking and nibbling roughly at the back of your neck.
"Come, love! C – Come for us~!" Geto croaked out as narrowed brown eyes blazed with vigor; his furrowed brows and set jawline evident signs of him barely keeping it together.
The same was said for you as your continued insatiable clenching around their lengths had them pegging you in their hardest drive. Combined, it all drove you over the edge.
All you saw and felt was that same white hotness, wailing out loud as you unraveled. Drenching their abdomens, their thighs, the bedsheets covers. A lot really.
Your obscene wail was what set their beings spasmodic; the trigger warning, as their guts tightened in unison as they convulsed hard, roaring out loud, bursting the dams, painting your insides with their essence, leaking out of you, down their lengths and mixing with your own.
Dissolved into pleasure, you all came undone, the highs coming in waves of heaven. Wanting to chase that high, the chaotic duo kept at it, their cream coated loads still hitting your deepest crevice just to get the rest out, grunting whilst you were an exhausted mewling wreck.
Finally, their own highs in the clouds faded off, leaving their once stiff dicks now softened up. They lowered you down, releasing your knees, setting your legs draped against the soiled sheets.
Gojo collapsed against your backside, resting his sweaty warm face against your right shoulder while Geto draped himself over you up front, his face buried in your tits. You shuddered as one hand draped through Geto's ruffled raven locks while your other hand brushed back Gojo's snowy locks stuck to his sweaty forehead.
"Y/n-chaaaaaan~" Gojo cooed teasingly despite the fatigue, no doubt smirking. "Hands on practice, success~"
"Quite the memorable lesson, indeed~" Geto's soothing voice also teemed with wry humor as he looked up at you with his nose lodged between your hills.
Of course, they'd be smug about making you cum hard.
"J … Jerks." Your halfhearted jab was overshadowed by you nearly fainting sideways, instinctively triggering their sudden boost in reflexes, having them grabbing you before laying you gently down on your side.
"Maybe we pushed her too far." Gojo hinted at.
Geto raised a questioning brow at his crazy bestie lover. "Maybe?"
Still, they chuckled weakly at the night's events as they laid on their sides, keeping their shafts inside your comfy self; the bump in your tummy being sheer physical evidence of them in the womb. Their arms encased you, flushed between their glowing drenched selves, their legs entangling with your own.
"Love you two." Your nearly silent murmur added to your overall allure as your hands balled up against Geto's abs, your cheek pressed up to his scar covered chest as your own pillow for the night, dozing off leisurely to la-la land.
Gojo kissed your free cheek, using your shoulder as his pillow, whispering into your ear, "We love you too, beautiful~"
Geto kissed your forehead, smiling looking at your precious self snuggling into him. "Always."
As the iconic sorcerer duo kissed each other goodnight, they too conked out, leaving cleaning up to the morning.
For now, three being one, in their own little world, was like and will be like many more nights to come.
Literally.
#geto suguru#gojo satoru#jjk#jjk geto#jjk gojo#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu geto#jjk fanfic#jjk au#jjk smut#jjk suguru#jjk satoru#gojo satoru smut#geto suguru smut#satosugu smut#satosugu x reader#smut#gojo satoru x reader#geto suguru x reader#gojo x reader#geto x reader#geto smut#gojo smut#jjk anime#satosugu#gojo x female reader#geto x female reader#short smut#suguru smut#satoru smut
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how are you feeling?
+ all the other asks asking me how I am SPOILERS AHEAD
I am... fucking devastated. I absolutely loved it it until saw the ending but it is very difficult for me to like something with a bad ending so now so now it's very difficult for me to like S2. And honestly, Season 2 was the only thing in life I was looking forward to so... yeah, I'm pretty fucked up by it. I had entertained the possibility of somewhat open ending but I believed it will be a happy one like in S1, Neil said it will be soft, gentle, romantic so I truly believed in that happy ending.
And I like... logically I know that Neil has planned more, and that we might get Season 3 or he might finish it in a book. So brain sort of knows that this is not the ending and the ending is in the cottage, but does it help the heart? No, not at all. Yeah, fucking gutted, I cried a lot, tried to sleep, went for a long walk.
I will have to try to somehow love the bits before the S2 ending - and I truly to love them - it's just there is such a fucking big strangling shadow over my heart for it.
So... yeah... not feeling good.
Hope you are doing better. <3
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Platonic Yandere Kento Nanami x Adoptive Daughter!Reader
This was the Request of @yukiotacon i hope You like it!
Genre: Headcanons
Reader: female
Warnings: Yandere behavior, Overprotectiveness, isolation, past trauma (HAIBARA), unhealthy relationship, UNHEALTY MINDSET, some persecution, angry Nanami is a scary Nanami. I think that's all.
At first Nanami never thought he would be a father, with his line of work and how lethal it is, he did not believe he could even get married to start a family.
Although of course, that changed completely when you lived in his life.
You were the youngest daughter of a family that had been a victim of the curses, and a special girl at that, because you were able to see the curses before apparently, but your family had discarded them as imaginary friends of their infant daughter.
Thanks to this, they could not foresee the imminent danger and it cost them their lives.
to everyone except you.
When Nanami found you, all alone, crying for someone to help you, but still with innocence on your face... it awakened something in him.
(Haibara, you remind him a lot of Haibara, someone whose life and innocence were taken from him, he can't let them do the same to you)
Kento decided that he would take care of you, although to be honest, he knew there was something wrong with him at the time he decided.
but he honestly didn't care at that point.
That's how you ended up as his daughter. I tried to make you have a normal life, away from the curses, to make you forget about your bad experience, but some marks remained forever...
Nanami has mostly overprotective tendencies and is somewhat strict, but at the same time she is very aware that what she feels is WRONG.
So I have long insisted on having your life, yes, but away from the world of Sorcery.
He will tell you HORRIBLE anecdotes and stories of co-workers who died at work, the horrors of curses, everything to keep you away from that world.
He himself usually eliminates curses that appear near his house, so he will hardly teach you anything at first.
It is only when you start your high school years that you insist more on the topic of learning how to better deal with curses because, well, schools are full of them.
(Nanami begins to regret not having taught you at home but it's too late)
If you insist enough, you will finally get him to teach you the basics of cursed energy and thus be able to kill curses little by little.
honestly Nanami is a nice Platonic Yandere to have. in this special case at least.
As long as you don't do anything related to the world of Wizardry, he's almost like a normal father. Just a little paranoid and protective, but hey, what father of daughters isn't?
When Nanami is an office worker, this side of him is more noticeable, because although he is miserable with his job, he is more than happy to see you have a normal life as a NORMAL teenager. Coming home from work and finding yourself either arriving or leaving school is very rewarding.
He feels like he found a reason to live.
Even if Nanami is more manageable at this time, he is no less lethal to anyone who even remotely poses a threat to you.
Did you mention someone who followed you at school? no more.
Is a classmate teasing you at school and the teachers do nothing? Kento will talk to that person...
The same goes for people he considers a "bad influence" yup, he's that kind of father. It requires knowing your friends (or at least, their parents) to know if it is safe to leave you with them. If they don't pass his standards, you won't see them or hang out with them again.
He just don't want to lose you...
(^^MANIPULATION)
For this reason, he is quite undecided about whether to tell you about his return to the world of Jujutsu.
He KNOWS you're interested in Jujutsu even after all, but he doesn't want you to go down this hole with him.
You would eventually find out, he reasons, and if he were to die on the job, you DESERVE to know why after all.
whether he tells you or you find out, you find out and Nanami doubles down on his overprotective tendencies by 200%.
Your current year of high school is homemade, why? because Nanami no longer trusts that high-grade curses cannot appear where you study and you cannot defend yourself.
stay home where it is safe.
I can see him even installing (without telling you) a baby monitor somewhere in the house to make sure you're there all the time.
If Gojo finds out about you, Nanami would be soooo screwed. Gojo wouldn't stop pestering him to tell him things about you, but at some point Nanami explodes and threatens him VERY SERIOUSLY to rip his throat out if he breathes another word about you.
It startled Gojo a little to be honest.
I mean, he was used to annoying Nanami all the time, but seeing how he changed so drastically when he brought up a specific topic related to you...it was even terrifying.
what topic was it? Letting you go on quests as a Sorceress.
Nanami thought it was just a joke from Gojo (as always) but in reality the thing was... different.
You had gone for Gojo to give you some training secretly from Nanami when you saw that he clearly wouldn't give it to you.
and Gojo simply accepted because he thought it would be fun to see Nanami's reaction when he found out.
Gojo didn't think Nanami was AS bad as you made him out to be with the overprotectiveness, you were a teenager after all.
but now...he took it more seriously.
Satoru wanted to know if Nanami would be okay in a "hypothetical" case because even if it seemed funny at first, he didn't think that with everything Nanami had been through he shouldn't take his opinion into consideration.
Although in the end he decided that the best thing would be to send you for more experience and (hopefully) give Nanami a lesson in your capabilities.
NOW, when Gojo sends you on your missions, you are ecstatic, finally some action! Finally something different from your normal, monotonous life! It was great!
The hardest part was altering the monitor that you KNEW your father had left at home and fixing it before he arrived. A part of you tried not to feel bad about all this, but on the other hand, who in their right mind puts a MONITOR on their TEENAGE DAUGHTER?? You had valid points.
although it didn't last long...
Nanami knew there was something wrong with you and in general several things were happening simultaneously with that.
Nanami randomly lost control of the monitor she had left at home and only recovered the image even hours later.
and he could feel that every time you were with more... attitude? more challenging.
He HAD to know what was causing this rebellious phase in you that he KNEW it would get worse if he didn't stop it, maybe some guy? He will kill him,a bad influence friend? He will get rid of it, but he has to know.
and when he does that is when he sees you come out of a successful mission.
tired, with some scratches, with your energy damned at FULL and when both of you exchange glances....
you run.
And run, and run and run...
What else should you do? You weren't going to tell him this way! You didn't want to face it.
Besides, the dark look your father had before he realized you had seen him was...dark to say the least. You never thought you'd see your father like this.
although you also didn't expect to see him come after you with a new level of anger.
It looked like a wild animal going after you.
You tried to use the advice that Gojo had given you, but you found yourself overshadowed by your desperation, he was much faster than you...
You tried to take him near civilians, thinking that he wouldn't try anything with them around, but you were scared when you saw him take out his tool.
Was he REALLY going to use it!?? With so many people around!? It's leaving you without options.
You finally decided to go somewhere further away from the people for their safety, but at some point you lost Nanami from sight. no no no no where the hell did he go??
The only thing you remember before falling unconscious was thinking about how you left your teacher waiting.
and now here you are back, at home, with your "father" on another "normal" day.
The house now looked like a military fort when you woke up, with an anklet on it.
despite all the turbidity of the matter. You just wanted to know something from your father. The WHY of all this, what makes it worth it?
His answer sounded both crazy and made a lot of sense, at the same time that you understood something...
that he just wanted to protect you at all costs, he has already lost so many people in his life for that reason, he refuses to lose you too...
He will never leave you.
Shares, reglogs, and comments are very welcome!
Thanks for the Request ❤️❤️❤️
#headcanons#fem reader#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu no kaisen#yandere platonic#platonic reader#platonic yandere#nanami kento#jjk nanami#platonic yandere nanami#yandere nanami#yandere nanami x reader#platonic nanami
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Charlie Morningstar is probably one of the worst written characters I’ve seen in the series.
(This one’s gonna be a long one…)
Ok…. So I watched all six episodes and to be honest I’m pretty much pissed off by this character specifically. This might be more of a rant rather than a critique, so I do understand that not everything I say in this will end up being as constructive exactly but I genuinely need to get this off my chest, especially since she is a character I’ve specifically and recently been hyper fixating on before the show released…
(Side note: I realized the post was very long so, to have it be easier to read I added titles for each section! Hope this helps)
!!WARNING FOR SPOILERS FOR THE SERIES BTW!!
> Charlie lacks the qualities of being a main character.
Now besides the piss poor excuse of an introduction for her (and the rest of the cast) in the main series, I honestly question why exactly Charlie specifically is the “protagonist” in the first place (and I say protagonist with the biggest of quotes here, you’ll see why).
In the first episode of the series “overture”, we don’t really see much of her character, most of the time we’re shown screen time of Vicky (a nickname I made for v*ggie since I’m not gonna call her by her genitalia thank you) trying to make an ad for the hotel and even when we do get the screen time of her, she’s barely doing anything other than hearing viv’s self insert- I mean- Adam just go on and on about whatever he’s talking about.
And when Charlie does go on to explain her plan to redeem sinners she’s just interrupted and then stands there when they start singing hell is forever, she doesn’t “go off” like the hazbin Twitter says, she just stands there and then tries to say something only to get interrupted again and again and then gets pushed out of the meeting room before going back to the hotel to see it’s spread across in the news that the next extermination happens in 6 months.
Now although one might argue “Well didn’t Charlie at one point said in the show that giving orders is so mean?” Well yes but again, Charlie is literally the princess of pride ring, you would think that since her parents are literally rulers of pride, they would’ve probably teach her how to stand on her two feat, especially if your RUNNING A HOTEL. And the thing is, she has stood up and did so in episode 6 and the goddamn pilot (which is at this point is probably canon due to Charlie calling it the hazbin hotel instead of happy hotel), even going as far as to fight Katie Killjoy because she thought it was stupid.
Not only that but the episodes after overture, her screen time lessens until somewhat in 5 and 6. She doesn’t really appear that much in the between these episodes to the point where she feels like a supporting character rather than a protagonist. And when she does get screen time, she’s either forgettable at best and infuriating at worst.
> Charlie’s character is poorly written and just dumb.
In the episodes past overture, she’s literally rock solid stupid that I literally screamed in real life multiple times “you’re a fucking idiot” because of how frustrated I was from what she was doing, In episode 2 she literally trusted sir pentious to go to her hotel even though he almost destroyed her place and in episode 6 thought it was a hunky dory idea to let a person who literally exploded buildings to take charge of giving her employees a “good time”. Yes it could be played off as her being naive but if she’s that naive of a person then maybe she shouldn’t be a boss of a hotel to rehabilitate sinners.
Heck, in episode 4, Charlie gets pissed off and turns into her demon form because val literally started hurting Angel when he followed him into the room (and rightfully so) but when angel tells her to leave and drags her out of the studio, she’s just in her normal form and fucks off??? Reminder she’s literally the princess of hell! She could beat the shit out of val if she wants to, why did she just fucked off after angel had her leave?
“But Kat, what if something bad happens to angel if valentino dies?” Like what? If it was explained that if an overlord dies then the sinners that made a deal with them die too or something like that then yeah, that would make sense but we don’t know that whether or not that’s the case, if anything angel could be just fine after Valentino dies but we don’t know that.
And even when Charlie had the opportunity to go out there and apologize to him herself after he stormed out of the hotel, she and Vicky just send Husk to do it. And I have to ask, WHY? HUSK didn’t know what was happening to Angel earlier. HUSK wasn’t at the porn studio that Angel was working at. CHARLIE WAS….
“Well Kat, what if Charlie was scared about making things worse?” Fair enough, but again sending Husk is a stupid idea, I feel like it would’ve AT LEAST made sense if she sent Vicky out there. Because Charlie didn’t know if husk could fight (if you could even call it that, all he did was throw cards at people), BUT SHE KNEW VICKY COULD THOUGH. But nah we gotta do it for the ship right?
And then Charlie had the gull to be crying that angel forgave her after she fucked up, like shut the fuck up… it’s like if viv looked at a bunch of chars that had the optimistic care-free ‘ish personality and thought that meant making her as pathetic as a baby crying that they didn’t get a lollipop from their mommy.
Like I’m gonna be honest with you, it’s literally gone to a point where I think Orel Puppington (aka the 11 yo Christian kid who worships Jesus and gets harmful lessons from other Christians) makes a better Charlie Morningstar than the Charlie Morningstar herself!
And that thought is justified when he tried to go help people in Sinville, “Kat he ended up turning into a pimp at the end of the episode” yeah but AT LEAST HE TRIED TO ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING! Which leads me to another question….
> How is Charlie gonna redeem sinners exactly???
Like honestly, I’m serous with this one. How is Charlie gonna redeem these guys?
I ask this because in the series, she barely does ANYTHING to help these guys, she and the rest of the characters just sit around and then do an activity that is the equivalent of something you would do in kindergarten except it’s with ADULTS.
I don’t know about you but If your idea of helping people is doing just that and nothing else, then the only thing the people around you are gonna get is them being annoyed at first and eventually walking out with thinking your not helping them but rather just treating them like a baby who doesn’t know anything, and the only thing your gonna get personally is nothing because you did dick all.
Like other than that she pretty much just whines about sinners not going to her hotel and oh gee I wonder why, it’s not like your not doing anything to help these sinners not committing sins anymore, oh definitely not, your absolutely being helpful.
“Oh but Kat! Charlie was born in hell, how can she know how to help people? She’s not from the human world so, she wouldn’t exactly know how to help these people!” I would tell you to look at the world building for the series and it’s spin off but that’s a whole other can of beans that I don’t wanna cover today and this is already getting to long, so y’know what? We’ll go with that.
If Charlie didn’t know how to help people and was trying to figure out what she can do to help sinners get better, then why didn’t she just ask her employees for suggestions? Y’know, the other sinners who were from the human world and had experiences while they were alive and such?
Yeah, I get that not all of their advice would be exactly good or healthy (since they’re sinners who’ve done many bad things after all) BUT ITS AT LEAST SOMETHING FOR FUCKS SAKE!!!
She literally does nothing, she just expects you to immediately get better after some improvisations or whatever other activities she does and once you’ve done one nice thing then boom you’re close to redemption.
> Conclusion.
Charlie Morningstar is (like I said in the beginning) probably one of the worst characters in the hazbin hotel series, she at best a stereotype of the “everything is sunshines and rainbows” character tropes and at worst is a pathetic excuse of a main character and is nothing but a rotten shell of her character from the pilot.
I would go on about how her design’s also bad but I’m sure millions of people have already said the same issues and I’ve already posted my redesign of her before the show dropped.
I might plan on posting a rewrite of her or maybe explain my problems with another character or episode but I don’t know.
But until then, I’ll see y’all later!
#hazbin critical#hazbin hotel critical#hazbin hotel charlie#charlie morningstar#hazbin hotel criticism#hazbin hotel critique#Kat’s rants#rant post#hazbin critique#hazbin criticism#hazbin charlie#charlie magne#watch as I get hate on this post and get called an anti#like I genuinely feel like that’s gonna happen but idc
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Eldritch monster anon here! So to answer your question, yep that image you shared is what I have in mind ^^
Slashers with Reader Who's Secretly an Eldritch Horror
Slashers x Reader
Includes: Freddy, Michael, Jason, Thomas, Bubba, Brahms, Norman, Billy, Stu, Vincent, Bo, & Lester
A/N: I'm not super confident I wrote Reader correctly, and I didn't go into too much depth about what they look like or everything they're capable of, so I hope you still like it!
You can find the original request here.
Freddy Krueger
He can't help but fantasize of the damage you two can cause when together
He sensed something was a little different about you from the beginning
But he didn't think it would be quite this drastic
What's funny though is that he thinks you don't know that he's found out about you
He's dead wrong
But it's kind of a game to you, and you're having fun with it
He's "secretly" caught you distorting the people and things around you
And he admires that fact since he does the same thing in his Dream World
You were hoping he'd catch on sooner
But oh well
It's just more fun that way
Michael Myers
He somehow doesn't know already, and you kind of want to keep it that way
Michael has this thing with power
He knows he's unstoppable, chaotic, and deadly
And he likes it that way
If he ever found out about the things you're capable of...
It would not be good
Your partnership would go from providing to battling
He wants- needs to be the monster in the relationship
And although you have the upper hand on him, he would not go down without a fight
He knows there's a darkness brewing in you
He just doesn't know quite what it is
And let's hope it stays that way
Jason Voorhees
He honestly learns about what you are pretty early on
He didn't really assume anything was off about you, but he was so open and sweet to you that you felt comfortable enough to tell him about everything
And knowing that he's not the most dangerous being around is somewhat... nice
He really admires your power and strength
And it feels good to be able to leave for a while and not worry that something will happen to you
You are more than capable of protecting yourself, and that lifts a huge weight off of Jason's shoulders
Perhaps he's too trusting, but he doesn't worry about you turning that dark power on him
You've only showed him genuine love and care, so he feels like he has nothing to worry about
Thomas Hewitt
Perhaps he's being a little naive
The way you immediately ate his "dinner" without so much as a question
The sudden increase of people coming by the house and being captured
How you come out of the most dangerous areas unscathed
There is clearly something about you that isn't... normal
But it's not his place to question it
He loves you, and you love him
End of story
Even if he did start to question what's really going on, he wouldn't press the matter
He figures you'll open up to him whenever you're ready
And if that's never, then so be it
Bubba Sawyer
He's just a sweet, naive man
You could literally show your true colors right in front of his eyes, and he'd still have no clue
But it doesn't really matter
He loves you for you no matter what you look like or what you're capable of
As long as you still care for him like this, you can do whatever you want
He will admit that his family has had a much easier time getting "food" than ever before
And those that do come by are really easy to capture since you've been with him
But those are just coincidences, surely
You're his sweet angel
He has to protect you
Little does he know that you really can handle yourself...
Brahms Heelshire
He has found it a little odd that the food still arrives on time without so much as a word from Malcolm
And he hasn't seen a single soul since you began to staying with him
But he's very happy with all of this, so he doesn't question it
He can sense that you're a little... different than other people
But that's part of the reason he likes you so much in the first place
He only realizes the true extent to this theory when you somehow force him to bed without so much as a touch
He was completely flabbergasted at this, but he didn't dare question it
Safe to say that he has no intention on giving you a hard time again
Norman Bates
He doesn't question a thing
If anything, you're his good luck charm since all of these good things started to happen when you showed up
The motel business is booming
Any issues he was dealing with seemed to disappear in plain sight
Everything seems to be going his way for once
Mother keeps telling him there's something off about you, but he ignores her
What does she mean?
You're his sweet and perfect partner
There's nothing else to it
You want to show him the truth at some point, but he just seems so happy right now
Maybe you'll tell him later
Billy Loomis
Billy straight up demands for you to tell him what's going on
Unlike a lot of people, Billy follows his gut instinct
He's known something was up with since you two started seeing each other
His world was just too... perfect
And he swears that there's this dark aura that surrounds your head at all hours of the day
It's only after his latest kill went too well that he interrogates you
When you tell him, he asks you to prove it
The look on his face when you showed him just what you were was enough to send you into a fit of laughter
To be honest, Billy is a little bit scared of you now
Knowing that you're capable of literally taking him out of existence is intimidating to say the least
Best believe Billy is going to do his best not to get on your bad side
Stu Macher
Stu is true golden retriever energy
Meaning, he is very sweet and loving towards you, but there's not much else going on inside that brain of his
He doesn't suspect a single thing with you
You are his perfect partner, and that's about it
Sure, his killings with Billy have been going super well, and he always comes out unscathed
Yeah, that person who shushed him in the movie theater was found completely mutilated the next day
What about it?
You wouldn't have anything to do with it
Stu just thinks that you are made out of 100% innocence
And you kind of like it that way
You'll tell him when you're ready
Until then, you just appreciate Stu treating you like a person and not some powerful God
Vincent Sinclair
Vincent has been finding himself with a new sense of inspiration for his wax art
He dreams of this ethereal yet terrifying being he has never seen before
He's told you about the dreams, and you always respond with a soft smile and a "that's interesting"
Vincent as no clue that you're the creature he's been seeing
And you must say, his art is pretty damn accurate
You didn't have any intentions on telling him the truth, at least not right away
But the way he sees this version of you as his muse makes you want to say something sooner
He's basically idolizing you, and he doesn't even know it
Not that he doesn't act this way with you normally
But how fun it could be to see his reaction once you tell him the truth
Bo Sinclair
Maybe he suspects something is going on, but he doesn't say anything
Ignorance is bliss
And although he's usually one to demand what he wants to know, he doesn't quite feel comfortable doing that with you
There's something in those eyes of yours that tells him he may be better off not knowing
Plus, things for him and Ambrose have been going suspiciously well for him
He literally had some random man run up to him begging to become one of the wax figures
This is all just odd
And he knows you're hiding something by the way you smile at him
But everything is so perfect that he doesn't want to ruin it
So for now, let him be ignorant
Lester Sinclair
He's never really been in a relationship as passionate as this one before
So you best believe any single thought or doubt that goes through his head is immediately thrown out
He loves you, and you're so nice to him
There's no way you could be hiding something from him, right?
I mean, it's a little odd how you seem to appear from thin air, and your hair never has a single strand out of place
There was something that feels... not real
But that's just crazy
He probably only feels that way because of how perfect he thinks you are
Until you explicitly stand before him in your true form, he's going to just ignore these thoughts
#slashers x reader#slasher preference#slashers headcanon#slashers preference#slashers#michael myers headcanons#michael myers x reader#michael myers#jason voorhees headcanons#jason voorhees x reader#jason voorhees#thomas hewitt#thomas hewitt x reader#brahms heelshire x reader#brahms heelshire#brahms heelshire headcanon#billy loomis x reader#billy loomis headcanon#billy loomis#stu macher x reader#stu macher#stu macher headcanons#vincent sinclair#bo sinclair x reader#bo sinclair#lester sinclair#freddy krueger#freddy krueger x reader
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uh...hehe. no reason why i wrote this...no reason at all🙂in any case, writing this has also let me know i'm not that great at writing threesomes. oh well, ya live and you learn
Summary: You go to a concert of your favorite band and you manage to catch the attention of the vocalist, who invites you backstage for a more intimate meet and greet. In a not so surprising turn of events, the guitarist walks in on you two at just the right moment.
Warnings: Rockstar!Steve x Reader x Rockstar!Eddie, slight drug use, SMUT (MINORS DNI) threesome, fingering, light degradation and name calling (slut, whore), king of consent Steve, grinding, spitroast, oral (m!receiving), overstimulation, multiple creampies, and some Steddie implications and impossible situations
word count | 5.3k🤙🏻
You were finally going to a concert of one of your favorite bands ever, Corroded Coffin. Having enough money saved up to get the tickets, you almost cried tears of joy seeing the big bold letters of Ticketmaster read: You Got ‘Em. Let the Anticipation Begin.
And anticipate, you did.
The waiting was the hardest part. You had bought the ticket a few months in advance, purchasing the VIP meet and greet package as well. You did without thinking honestly, and as soon as you realized what you had done, you almost had a full blown panic attack. You knew this band were just people like everyone else, but these dudes practically saved your life and the realization that you were going to meet them? It felt like you were going to meet God, but like, ten times the nervousness of that. You had no idea how your mind and body was going to handle this. You’d never met your idols and inspirations before.
You just hoped to every deity out there that you wouldn’t pass out. That would’ve been fuckin’ embarrassing. But the nerves only got worse the day of, the drive to the venue not helping in the slightest, but talking to other fans about each other's shared nerves made you feel a little better knowing you weren’t the only one to feel this way. And before you knew it, it was time to head inside the building to meet and take a picture with the band before the show started. Time sure flies by talking to other people while waiting in line.
You tried to keep your hands from shaking as you waited your turn, seeing the fans in front of you return with wide smiles on their faces and even some with tears. Oh god, you really hoped you didn’t cry, that would be even more embarrassing than fainting somehow. You won’t cry, you won’t cry…
You tried your best to not freak out when you walked up to the band members, but you couldn’t stop the smile that decorated your face when they seemed just as happy to meet you. Okay, you weren’t crying or freaking out, you were behaving like a normal human, so far so good. You made small talk for a few seconds, introducing yourself, telling them how much their music meant to you, etc. You felt a little guilty about it, but you were most excited about meeting Steve and Eddie. They were by far your favorite members, everyone who’s met them always talks about how sweet and down to earth they are, which made you feel much more at ease when you first bought the meet and greet pass. And those comments proved to be right, if anything it was an understatement.
Steve was somewhat handsy, but not in a creepy way, you could tell that’s just how he interacted with people, but it didn’t stop your face from heating up. What made it worse was how Eddie was staring at you, a smirk on his face as he watched you and Steve talk excitedly. It almost distracted you from the conversation, but Steve’s hand on your shoulder quickly made your brain focus back on him.
For the picture, you were standing in between Steve and the drummer, with Eddie and the other member on the end. But that wasn’t okay with Eddie for some reason, you had to hold in a soft gasp as he pushed his way over to stand next to you, wrapping his arm around your waist with an innocent smile while Steve, after rolling his eyes, put his own arm over your shoulders.
While you all got in your picture poses, your eyes almost widened comically as you felt a wetness gathering in your underwear…right in front of them.
Why? Out of all the moments, your body had to pick exactly now to lube itself up. You hoped the band couldn’t tell how your face was. If your cheeks got any warmer, you would probably have steam rising from your skin. You really respected these dudes, you felt awful being so goddamn horny for them. But it seems luck was not on your side because when you lifted your arms to wrap them around Eddie and Steve at the same time, your shirt rode up just enough for Eddie’s hand to touch your skin. “Damn, you’re hot.” Eddie blurted out suddenly, making everyone stare at him in confusion, mostly embarrassment from Steve.
“Dude, what the fuck?”
“No, no, no, not like that.” He winced but before you could get slightly offended, he corrected himself again. “No, fuck, I mean, you are hot but you also feel hot.” The long haired man stuttered, making you giggle.
Then Steve decided to put the back of his hand to your forehead, as if you couldn’t be anymore mortified. “Wow, you’re right, Eds. She does feel kinda hot. You okay?”
Not even having time to register how sweet Steve was for being concerned, you came up with the first excuse you could. “Yeah, yeah, I’m good, I’m always a bit warm. Plus, it’s August.” They seemed to be okay with that excuse enough for the photographer to finally take the fuckin’ picture, allowing you to escape the awkward situation without any more blows to your ego.
“Hope you enjoy the show!” Steve smiled at you before you had to leave. You knew you would.
It was by far the best night of your life so far. Meeting the people you looked up to, watching them perform your favorite songs up close. The barricade was so close to the stage you honestly thought you could probably reach out and they’d be able to reach back, but you were too busy ogling Steve and Eddie to even think about doing such a thing. They all sounded pitch perfect, just like they do on their albums. If you couldn’t hear the breaths Steve took before belting out another lyric, you’d think he was lip syncing because his vocals were perfect. And you didn’t even know Eddie could sing until you heard him doing backup vocals. You felt like you were in heaven. No matter how much your feet burned from being on your feet dancing around and how hoarse your voice was going to be in the morning from how loudly you were singing along, you felt like you could do this forever.
Watching Eddie play guitar was a privilege in its own right, seeing how fast his fingers moved across the fretboard shouldn't have made you as horny as you were. You were positive your underwear was going to be drenched by the time the night was over. Steve winking at you in the crowd didn’t make your situation any better. If you didn’t know any better, it’s like he knew. But he couldn’t, right? No way. You caught Eddie’s eye multiple times as well, you both smiling at each other before he looked back at his guitar. Yeah, this was the life.
All too soon, the show was over and people were starting to head home. Time really does fly when you’re having fun. But something happened and you had no idea how to react. About to head to the merch table, you heard your name called. Out of all the people that called out your name, you never expected it to be Steve. You saw some members of the opening bands out on the standing room floor and merch tables talking and taking pictures with fans, but you never expected to see members of the headlining band out and about. “Hey, did you enjoy the show?” He asked and you had to blink a few times before being able to reply.
“Yeah, yes, I did! It was the first time seeing you guys and you really knocked it out of the park, seriously. I doubt any concert I go to in the future will even come close to this one.”
“I’m so happy you enjoyed it.” He grinned, reaching up to gently grip onto your upper arm. “I mean, from the way a smile never left your face during the show, I figured you must’ve liked it a little.”
You felt your face heat up again, a wide eyed expression on your face. “You…you were watching me?”
He shrugged. “It was hard not to, you’re pretty adorable.” You giggled like a schoolgirl and immediately regretted it, hated being flustered so easily. But being called adorable by the vocalist of your favorite band was definitely not on your mind when you woke up this morning.
“T-Thanks.” You stuttered, unsure of what to do, but Steve already had a plan in mind.
“Look, I’m gonna be straight with you and if I make you uncomfortable at all then you have my permission to kick me in the nuts, I swear.” You chuckled in confusion, but motioned for him to continue. “I think you’re gorgeous, I’m pretty sure I kept looking for you in the crowd cause I don’t remember doing anything but that, besides singing of course. So, only if you’re a hundred percent comfortable with it, I’d like to take you back to my dressing room and…show you how much I appreciate you coming to see us.”
You blanched, your body freezing in shock at the sudden proposition. You were dreaming, you must’ve been. Unable to form words, Steve took your silence as offense and quickly started to apologize, calling himself stupid among other self deprecating words. “No, no, don’t be sorry! I just wasn’t expecting it, is all” You quickly explained.
Steve winced. “I’m sorry, I should’ve phrased it a bit better.”
You giggled. “Steve, stop saying sorry! It’s okay, really! I’d…I’d love to.”
Steve’s eyes lit up instantly, a shine coming to his puppy dog brown eyes. “Really?”
“I haven’t kicked you in the nuts, have I?” You joked with a light smile, eliciting a relieved chuckle from the man.
“Then please…follow me.”
You were all nerves as you followed Steve to the dressing room, wringing your hands and trying to take deep breaths to calm yourself. You obviously wanted this, so badly, but you couldn’t help but to be a bit intimidated alone with one of your heroes.
“You want a drink or weed or anything?” Steve asked politely as he escorted you into his dressing room.
“Oh, no, thanks. I’m good.” You replied, trying your best to keep the timbre in your voice from wavering.
Steve smiled, taking a few cautious steps closer to you, his eyes gazing over your form. “Okay.” You tried to even out your breathing as he gently pulled you to him by your jeans’ belt loops, his hand coming up to trail a finger along your jawline, the act making your core throb and causing goosebumps to raise along your arms.
Impatiently, you went to lean in, but Steve stopped you. “Just to make sure; you do want this, right? You don’t feel pressured? I don’t wanna force you to do anything. You can walk right outta here and I won’t judge you one bit. Hell, you can still kick me in the balls if you want.” Steve’s eyes portrayed genuine care, making your heart melt at his blatant kindness and consideration. It made you absolutely sure.
“I do, Steve. I want this. I want you…” You whispered, feeling your body already being consumed by lust. Your stomach churned at the boyish grin he gave you, gently grabbing a hold of your hips and leaning you against the vanity, tugging at the hem of your shirt before kissing you.
It was soft and slow at first, more of a peck. You could feel him testing the waters, giving you an out just in case you changed your mind at the last minute, but your heated body soon grew tired of his carefulness. Steve let out a quiet noise of surprise as you deepened the kiss, hungry for more of him already.
Your mind went fuzzy as you felt Steve’s hands traveling across every inch of you he could reach, each tentative squeeze and pinch growing more confident as the rougher he got the more mewls he elicited from you. You gasped into his mouth as he started to grind against you impatiently, keeping you securely pinned to the vanity behind you, the desk digging into the small of your back.
“Can I give you a hickey?” Honestly, he asked so sweetly that you had to say yes. So polite, so soft and innocent sounding, it almost made you forget he was grinding his erection against your clothed core.
His lips on your neck raised goosebumps all over your body, you were sure he could feel it. But he continued sucking and licking the soft skin of your neck until stung, making the friction of his pelvis against yours all the more pleasurable. Fuck, you could feel your arousal pooling in your underwear as the minutes passed. The more Steve pressed his obvious erection against you, the more your sticky slick spread. You couldn’t take it anymore. “Steve, please…” You whined, craving more of his touch.
“Tell me what you want, pretty girl.” Steve whispered, his lips coming up to gently nibble at your earlobe.
“I want you to fuck me…but I need you to stretch me out with your fingers first.”
Steve smirked. “As you wish.” And before you knew it, the man had expertly tugged down your jeans along with your damp underwear, then awkwardly tried to remove them over your shoes before you just kicked them off to make it easier. Steve let out a boyish chuckle that made the butterflies in your stomach flutter rapidly before pushing your legs apart to stand in between them. You shivered as Steve ran his fingers through your slick folds, a cheeky grin decorating his face at the feeling. “So wet already?” I’ve been wet ever since the meet and greet, you wanted to say but you were cut short by two of Steve’s fingers entering you without warning. “Still tight, though.” He chuckled, pressing further into you until he was knuckle deep, curling his digits and hitting that sensitive spot at the front of your walls.
Steve looked up at you with bright, wild eyes, a small smile playing at his lips as you stared back at him in a pleasured haze. “That feel okay?” He must’ve known it did, from the way you were breathing heavily, grabbing at his shoulders like a lifeline; but he sounded so genuine that you nodded with a soft whine. “Good. Let me know if it ever stops feeling that way, deal?”
God, he was so sweet and patient, it started to make yours run thin. You wanted him so badly, and after a few more minutes of Steve finger fucking you, you were sure you were ready to take his cock. You palmed him through his jeans, feeling his thickness, making your mouth water. “I need your cock, pretty boy.” Steve’s cheeks dusted a light shade of pink, making you grin.
You eagerly helped him shimmy down his jeans and briefs down to his ankles, too impatient to remove the articles of clothing. You were already so sensitive, so when Steve ran the head of his dick though your slick folds, you let out a pitiful whine. Steve gave you a once over before slowly pushing himself through your entrance, the two of you letting out gasps, groaning once he was fully sheathed. “Are you okay?”
“God, yes, Steve. Please, move…” You whimpered, trying to restrain yourself from canting your hips to get some more friction. You wanted it hard and fast, but Steve decided to take it slow…way too slow.
Steve thrusted in and out languidly, the feeling heavenly but not enough. You could feel how much he stretched you out, could feel every pulse in his veins, could hear how much your cunt was sucking him in deeper and deeper; all the while Steve never broke eye contact with you, he was every expression on your face, how your eyes subtly rolled to the back of your skull every time he brushed against your cervix, ate up every cute noise you made. You knew he was trying to draw this out for as long as possible, smiling every time you whined impatiently. He knew what you wanted, he was just being a fuckin’ tease. “Steve, please…I need it faster. Harder.”
He playfully raised a brow. “What? Trying to get it over with, huh?” He asked, pinching your side through your shirt.
“No-ah!” You yelped as he suddenly rammed into you, the force making you bounce, his grip on your waist the only reason you didn’t fall off the vanity. “Fuck.” You moaned loudly as Steve thrusted into you at a much faster rate, any objects on the vanity’s desk toppling over and falling to the dressing room floor. “Yes, yes, yes…” You cried, feeling his cock beat against your pleasure spot at the front of your walls, trying to keep in your embarrassing wails as he finally was giving you what you wanted.
“Goddamn, you feel so good, pretty girl. Fuck, I’ve been wanting to feel this gorgeous pussy for hours. I loved watching you in the crowd tonight, a smile never leaving your face, looking up at me like I was a god. You sure know how to make a man feel special, huh?” He rambled.
“You-fuck, you are special, Steve.” You tried to reply back, stuttering with every syllable.
“Yeah? Tell me again.”
“Y-You’re s-special, Steve…”
“Fuck, yes…” Steve’s lips attached to your neck once more, his teeth grazing against your sweet spot immediately, your walls pulsing around him as you were already so close to that peak.
You and Steve were so eager to take pleasure from one another, you both didn’t even hear the door to the dressing room open. “Well, well, well, now what do we have here?” You both gasped and turned to the intrusion, a sweltering heat coming to your cheeks as you saw the guitarist staring you both down with a small smirk playing at his lips.
Steve looked at you first, gauging your reaction before he replied to his bandmate, finding no shame or nervousness in your expression. “Caught myself a little groupie, Eds.” Steve chuckled, his thrusts halting to a stop, almost eliciting a whine of protest from you. Fuck, you were almost there. You could feel your almost orgasm dull and fade away. “Ain’t she a beaut’?”
You probably should’ve been mortified, but the way Eddie was staring down at you from his place at the door, you couldn’t help but want him as well. Both him and Steve seemed to pick up on your desires. But from the way you were looking at both of them, it didn’t take a genius to put it together.
Steve leaned down to peck the underside of your jaw, slightly jerking his head in the direction of his bandmate. “Want him to join? Though, I gotta warn ya, he’s a kinky little shit.” He teased.
You giggled, the idea already making your stomach churn with overwhelming excitement. “What, you like being called daddy or something?”
Eddie scoffs, his already dark eyes darkening further. “Anything that’s not missionary is kinky to Steve. What about you, hmm? Why don’t you tell me what kinks you enjoy and I’ll decide if you can handle me or not.”
His words went straight to your core, your walls pulsing around Steve’s dick, making the man grunt. “Big on impact play. Spanking, slapping. Choking is fun. Scratched, bit, hair pulled; love all that.”
Eddie smirked widely, allowing himself to step closer to the two of you. “Right up my alley. I think we’ll get along just fine, sweetheart.” Then he gave a look to Steve, he had stopped thrusting into you as soon as Eddie started to chat you up. “Take her to the couch and keep fucking her, Stevie.” He didn’t have to be told twice, as soon as the words left his mouth, the man above you switched you both over to the little loveseat in the green room, continuing the pistoning movements of his hips, making you cry out at the sudden pleasure. “And you don’t have to call me daddy, sweetheart. Just Eddie. What about you? What titles are you okay with?”
Steve’s cockhead rocking into that sweet spot inside you made your mind go blank once more. You knew what you loved, but nothing came to mind. “Any. All. Whatever you want to call me, Eddie. I’m fine with anything.” You whined, reaching out to palm the growing bulge in his ripped jeans.
“Whatever I want, huh? What if I called you my little whore, hm?”
You blushed. “Or slut…”
“My pretty little slut…” Eddie tested, interrupted by Steve’s groan.
“Fuck, she squeezed down so hard on me when you called her that.” He mumbled out shakily.
Eddie’s eyes lightened up at the conformation. “You liked being degraded, huh?” You squeaked when he wrapped one of his large hands around your throat, squeezing roughly and cutting off your oxygen supply. “You like being called a dumb little slut, don’t ya? Such a greedy little fucktoy.”
“Woah…” Steve laughed in shock. “I was gonna say that’s a little far, but she pulsed around me again. Felt so good…I think you can make her come with those words alone, dude.”
“I could see it on her, man.” He chuckled darkly, removing his hand from your neck, allowing you to take a gasping breath. “Flip her over, Steve.” Taking instruction obediently, Steve flipped you over onto your front, forcing you to slightly lean over the pleated arm of the sofa, making your face level with Eddie’s crotch. “I could just tell she’d love being degraded like the whore she is. Now, go on and take out my cock for me, pretty slut.” You cried out as Steve reentered you from behind, the new angle making stars obscure your vision. A harsh slap to your cheek forced you to come back to reality, Eddie’s expression morphing into impatience “Already too cock drunk to listen to simple commands?” He cooed condescendingly.
Trying to ignore the immense pleasure your body was feeling, you reached up with shaky hands to undo the fly on Eddie’s jeans, feverishly shimmying them down along with his boxer briefs. You gasped as his hard cock sprung from its confines, gently smacking you in the face before you got a hold on it. The tip angry and red, feeling the blood pulsing through the veins on his shaft from underneath your fingertips, your mouth watered in anticipation. You looked up at Eddie with a grin before wrapped your lips around the head of his dick, a relieved sigh escaping his mouth. “That’s a good girl…” Eddie moaned as you tried taking him deeper, your own moans adding a vibration around his cock.
“She caught your eye too, didn’t she?” Steve’s voice echoed from behind you, not stopping his thrusts into you, inadvertently forcing you to take Eddie deeper.
“How could I not? That cute little nervous expression when she met all of us. Plus, she was at the barricade, practically drooling.” The admission made your face flush with heat, but you were too preoccupied to care.
“I could see her eyeing your fingers during all your solos.”
You took a big gasping breath as Eddie pulled out of your mouth, getting on his knees to be level with you, a smirk playing at his lips. “That true, gorgeous? You liked watching my fingers play along my fretboard?” He chuckled condescendingly when you nodded. “Pretty girl’s so cock hungry, hm?”
“Fuck…” You whined as you felt your orgasm build and build, faster than before, feeling edged way too long.
“Oh.” Eddie hummed in amusement. “Steve, I think she’s gonna come. Can you feel it?”
“Yeah, she’s squeezing around me so fuckin’ hard.” He groaned loudly.
You moaned as Eddie’s hand returned to your throat, gripping tightly enough that you felt lightheaded. Sharp pricks of pain shot through your entire body as you felt the pressure on your trachea, but it only careened you forward to your release, eliciting a loud strained moan from your lips. “Fuck, are you gonna come for Stevie, hm?” You nodded, babbling nonsense you were sure Eddie couldn’t understand. “Good slut, go on, come on his dick.” You heard Steve moan beautifully as you pulsed around him, your velvety walls holding him in a vice grip as you shook and jolted from the intensity of your climax. You barely registered the dark chuckle that escaped Eddie as he watched you writhe and sob, almost hyperventilating as you came down.
“Oh, fuck…” Steve whispered, leaning down to place gentle kisses on the nape of your neck. “So good, so good, pretty girl. Doin’ so well for us.” You purred at the praise, the hodgepodge of both Steve’s praise and Eddie’s degradation throwing you for a loop. You barely had time to recover before the two men started to thrust into you at both ends, moaning in overstimulation and gagging on Eddie’s dick as Steve’s continued its relentless pace, desperate to get to his end too.
“Look up at me, sweetheart.” Eddie spoke and your eyes widened when you noticed his phone’s camera pointed down at you. “Such a pretty thing, sucking my cock so good.” He growled, keeping a tight hold on your hair. The fact that he was filming you sucking his dick probably should’ve concerned you, but honestly, it was kind of hot and you were too fucked out to care.
“Fuck, I’m close.” Steve announced, his dick pistoning into you like his life depended on it.
“Yeah?” Eddie grinned, putting his phone away. “You gonna come in her tight little pussy, pretty boy?”
Steve grunted as his thrusts became more sloppy and erratic, using you for his pleasure wildly. “Shit, I’m coming…” He moaned, throwing his head back in pure ecstasy as ropes of his warm cum filled you to the brim. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” He chuckled in exhaustion, pulling out and watched as your pussy clenched around nothing, how it slowly pushed his release out and dripped into a little puddle on the loveseat beneath you.
You took deep breaths as Eddie finally pulled out of your mouth, gently wiping drool off your chin before pushing a fucked out Steve out of the way so he could position himself behind you. “My turn, Stevie. Her mouth is fuckin’ phenomenal, but I wanna feel her tight little pussy myself.”
You gasped as Eddie flipped you over, making you face him. He looked fuckin’ angelic with him above you, much like how he looked performing on stage earlier. “Let’s take this shit off.” He growled, all but ripping your shirt and bra off your body, rendering you completely naked while he and Steve were practically still fully clothed. “Gorgeous fuckin’ tits, baby.” He groped them roughly, pinching your nipples until they stung. Eddie was much more comfortable being rough with you than Steve was. You were a hundred percent sure you’d have a multitude of bruises just from Eddie alone.
Again, unlike Steve, Eddie started with a much more rough pace. He wasted no time fully sheathing himself inside you with a hard cant of his hips, your slick and Steve’s leftover cum making his cock slid right in, the force making you cry out. “So tight still, baby girl. I wanna feel you come on my cock too. Think you can do that for me?”
“Maybe. Can try…” You stuttered, your brain practically melting from oversensitivity.
“Aw, she’s so eager.” Steve cooed, running his thumb along the sweat that was formed on the crease of your brow. “A people pleaser, this one, huh?”
Eddie smiled down at you. “That true, sweetheart? You wanna come on my cock just to please me?”
“Y-Yes…want you to feel it too.”
“Then let’s see if we can get you there one more time, okay?” Eddie’s cock was thicker and longer than Steve’s, the stretch a bit more painful but no less delicious. You couldn’t keep in your moans even if you tried. “Yeah, babygirl, let it out for me. Get fuckin’ loud. Let this whole building know how good my cock is making you feel.” You glanced over to see Steve lighting up a joint, his hair tousled and jeans pulled back up to his hips but left them unbuttoned. He looked properly beautiful. “Hey, eyes on me, slut.” Eddie growled, lightly slapping your face to get you focused. “Give me a hit of that, Stevie.”
Steve grinned as he placed the joint at Eddie’s lips, holding it for him as he took a deep inhale and blew the smoke out onto your face. The smell of the drug mixing with sex made for a delightful combo you wouldn’t have expected, the secondhand making into your lungs and making you dazed. With Eddie’s ruthless thrusts and the contact high, you felt yourself building and building up to your second orgasm, wailing and holding onto Eddie’s wrists where his hands were holding onto your love handles with a bruising grip. Your stomach ached with how rough and deep Eddie was inside you, but you never wanted him to stop, not when you were so close to another climax.
“Oh my god…” You sobbed, unable to hold back your loud moans even if you tried, the pleasure all too consuming and intense, you feared you’d black out.
“Oh fuck, you’re gonna come again, aren’t you?” Eddie mocked as he saw your body start to shake, chuckling darkly when you nodded hastily. “Steve, play with her clit for me, would ya?” You almost sobbed as Steve’s deft fingers came back for round two, finding your throbbing nub immediately and rubbing in a swift circular motion, making your eyes roll to the back of your head. Paired with Eddie’s long, thick cock hitting that spot inside you with every thrust, you were barrelling towards your orgasm at speeds that made you lightheaded. The room almost spinning and you couldn’t focus on anything besides the intense, blinding pleasure that was surging through you. “Yeah, good fuckin’ girl, come on this dick.” Eddie groaned, fucking you through your orgasm until your were crying in overstimulation once again.
“S’okay, pretty girl, you can take it.” Steve encouraged, coming to sit next to you to slot his lips against his and wipe away your tears. You couldn’t stop moaning into his mouth as Eddie sped up even more, chasing his release.
“Yes, yes, yes.” Eddie moaned. “You want my cum, slut?”
Steve grabbed your jaw, forcing you to keep your eyes on Eddie. You only nodded, all words escaping you for how fucked out you were, but Steve gripped tightly and making you wince. “Use your words, gorgeous.”
“Yes, E-Eddie, I want your c-cum.” You squeaked. “Come in me, please, Eds.” Eddie grinned at the whiny cadence of your voice, barely able to form the words. Steve started to suck and lick at your nipples as Eddie’s cum painted your inner walls, the man letting out downright beautiful whimpery moans as he finally finished, pulling out of you with a sharp exhale.
Finally able to fill your lungs properly, Steve and Eddie both peppered your face with gentle kisses before they helped clean you up, though not before admiring their handiwork. Hickeys and bruises galore, it looked like you were hit by a truck, you definitely felt like you had been due to the endurance of these two boys. You started to wonder how you were going to be able to walk to your car, let alone drive home with how wobbly your legs were.
“Are you okay, sweetheart?” Eddie asked softly as he and his bandmate helped you dress.
You beamed giddily. “More than okay. That was…amazing.” You giggled, causing both men to grin proudly. It was like a dream come true…
“Glad you enjoyed yourself, we sure did.” Eddie teased.
“And be sure to let us know whenever you’re coming to another show. We’ll let you have a backstage pass so we can do this all over again, pretty girl.” Steve winked.
“Oh, don’t worry. I definitely will.”
lalalalalalalala brain rot brain rot, i'll be in horny jail bye-bye!
#stranger things smut#steve harrington#steve harrington smut#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x fem!reader#steve harrington x f!reader#eddie munson#eddie munson smut#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x f!reader#steve x reader x eddie#eddie x reader x steve#steddie x reader#steddie x reader smut
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dear autumn / jeon wonwoo
➝ Wonwoo x Reader (ft. Joshua, Seungcheol, Mingyu, etc.)
➝ nonidol!au // angst???? // romance // fluff?????? // drama...ish??? // soulmate!au // somewhat past life!au
➝ word count: 18k (lol🧍🏻♀️) // playlist🎶
➝warnings: curses, lots of pov changes i'm sorry lol, i'm honestly not sure if the pace is a abrupt or not?, i'm not sure how you'll like this OC, she cries quite a lot towards the end sddfgd, that's about it i think
➝A/N: happy birthday, wonwoo❤ shoutout to @ahundredtimesover who's not even a carat but readily brainstormed with me when i asked🥺😭 also special thanks to @sleeplessdawn @twogyuu @savventeen for sparing your time to talk with me when i was unsure where to go with the plot💕💕 i'm gonna talk more on the author notes at the end instead of here. enjoy! hope you'll like this and don't hesitate to drop by and tell me what you think abt it even if you... don't like it sdjhfbsjhdf
In a world where everyone bears the soulmate mark to find the one heaven perfectly made for them, Wonwoo is an outlier with no marks in sight. But he has more pressing matters to attend to because he remembers his past life and the promise he made to his soulmate that he’d find her again no matter what.
Alternatively,
He didn’t think he’d be reborn in a world where you are made for someone else.
Wonwoo isn’t sure when it began. But he’s eighteen when he knows why they appeared and realizes that the memories in his head do not belong to his current lifetime.
They come to him through his dreams; sometimes long, sometimes short. At first, he thinks his mind is just playing games with him, but when he wakes up with an almost perfect recollection of whatever his older self in the dream did, he eventually realizes they aren’t simply dreams.
They’re his memories from another lifetime. Which one, he’s not sure. Wonwoo imagines they’re pieces of a puzzle–a very big one–making a bigger picture he doesn’t really understand at first until he does. Until it clicks one day why the dream has been getting longer and why he’s getting them in the first place.
He’s not himself when the dream happens, more like a shadow that watches from the sideline. He’s been seeing this older self of his for quite some time; he can’t be much older than he is now, probably in his mid twenties or so.
It was weird at the beginning, knowing how he’d look (looked?) in the future (...in the past? Fuck, this is confusing), but it was even weirder to watch himself with a girl that he seemed to be so very much in love with. Not that he can’t blame his other self. They’re soulmates, after all, if the identical marks on their wrists mean anything.
The word doesn’t even sound bitter in his lips anymore, and he wonders if it ever was.
Sure, he used to question why he’s an outlier and why he deserved to have no one when everyone else around him has someone predestined for them–someone that the universe deems just right and someone that will complement them in ways unimaginable.
He’s never angry though. Just a little lonely.
It’s not easy to be surrounded by people who are happy with their fate, who have someone that they know is their person for as long as eternity allows them to live. People are subtle with their pity when it comes to him and Wonwoo would like to think it probably has to do with the fact that Wonwoo doesn’t seem bothered at all.
Outliers aren’t that rare; perhaps one every one hundred people or so, and they’re not ostracized from society, just that they need to handle the pitiful looks every now and then–which never stops being annoying.
Wonwoo knows there’s a community for people like him though he has never been one to seek companies. He’s fine the way he is. He’d attend their gatherings when it’s one of the rare days he feels like being social, but he doesn’t attend enough to feel any kind of kinship towards them. They’re just some people who he somewhat sympathizes with.
Naturally, it means the community becomes a place where people try to find their romantic partner. After all, it is frowned upon if you try to date someone with a soulmate even if they haven’t met their other half.
…Which makes it awkward when they break up because even if the community isn’t very small, they’re still a minority and they need to stick together.
Hence, Wonwoo never really bothers.
It’s not like he’s into the concept of romance. When he was a kid, it simply didn’t appeal to him. During high school, games were more worthy of his time than anything. And during university… How could he when he’s been dreaming of the same girl over and over again? Any other romance potential simply didn’t register in his mind. His parents, who obviously had no idea about the dreams, tried to talk to him about it; to try dating and find love but quickly changed their insistence once they realized their son wasn’t too bothered himself.
He doesn’t even know if she’s alive in this lifetime, and yet…
“You’re really moving, huh?” Seungcheol brings him out of his mind, reminds him that he’s packing and he needs to get things done.
“They knew I’d be the one most willing to move away.” He shrugs. “Everyone else has their significant other here. Pretty sure they asked Namjoon first but with his pregnant wife and all–yeah.”
“I’m sure you’re still a choice because you’re competent.” The older guy reassures him. “What do you need me to do to help?”
“Help me throw away those bags in the living room, please.”
“Got it.”
Five minutes later, Seungcheol pops back into his bedroom.
“Are you throwing this away too?”
Wonwoo looks at the postcard in his hands, a look of recognition passes through his face before he takes it from him before he says he’s keeping it. The older guy throws him a curious look, but Wonwoo doesn’t offer any explanation so he leaves him be and returns to the living room.
“Autumn, huh.” He mutters to himself as he stares at the rows of yellow trees and ginkgo leaves adorning the ground on the postcard.
Autumn in the city is beautiful, Wonwoo has heard. He doesn’t know how it would be more beautiful there than here with the buildings and the busy lifestyle, but perhaps he’ll take the time to find out now that he’s moving there.
Maybe he’ll find out once he’s seen it himself.
And maybe…
Maybe he’ll also–
“Should we have some jjajangmyeon for lunch? I’m starving, man. Think I’d be able to eat two servings and an entire plate of dumplings. What about ordering some shrimp also? I think–”
Yeah.
Maybe.
Four months pass by in a blink and July comes around.
The city life is better than Wonwoo expected, but it’s not like he has any particular expectations to begin with. He’s a twenty six years old doing a regular job, living a regular life. He doesn’t have any grand plans in life, doesn’t strive to climb the corporate ladder nor make any difference in the world.
By theory, he should be some kind of a main character: an outlier with no soulmate mark and memories of a past life? Wonwoo would’ve written a book had he possessed any sort of literature gifts. But he can even barely express himself, let alone pour them into writings, so there goes his spotlight.
Plus, it’s not like he has ever told anyone about the memories. He tries looking things up online, and except for some ridiculous claims that were eventually proved to be false, he barely finds anything about it that would help. And if he could find nothing in the wonderful, vast world that is the internet, he doubts he would find answers in the real world.
So he’s just another guy. Another Jeon Wonwoo in the sea of people that would pass by people’s lives and lots would forget about.
And he doesn’t mind.
He really doesn’t.
But if there’s anything he could wish for…
He looks down at the small birthday cake his brother has ordered from the delivery app for him on behalf of his parents, the package greeting him in front of his door when he has just gotten back from work. He doesn’t really celebrate his birthdays, and usually only does so if the people around him encourage him to, namely Seungcheol and his family.
Though, now that he’s actually by himself in a city he’s still trying to get familiar with, it does feel a little lonely to be celebrating it alone, if you can even call it that. At least there’s a cake from his family and he might as well keep up with the tradition.
He lights up the ‘27’ candle and stares at it for a few seconds before he closes his eyes and makes a wish. A familiar smile he’s only seen in his dreams flashes through his mind, the warmth of the small fire blankets his face for a few seconds before it goes out.
I hope I can find you… whoever you are.
He dreams of another memory that night.
But, for the first time, he’s not watching from the sideline. The love of his life is pressed to his side as she urges him to blow the candle and make a wish. She takes his face while hers scrunch up into a smile, wishing him ‘happy birthday’ that he doesn’t think is the first that day before leaning in to kiss him on the lips.
He catches a glimpse of the single ginkgo leaf on her right wrist, the same exact thing on his left.
Wonwoo wakes up with a jolt before he could taste her lips against his, a thunderstorm outside his window and another inside his heart.
Despite being born in the season, Wonwoo isn’t fond of summer.
It’s too hot and there’s almost nothing he can do about it. He would’ve stayed inside 24/7 if he could, but that’s out of the question because he needs to go to the office and the amount of people in the public transportation is not something he looks forward to.
He doesn’t like winter for basically the same reason: it’s too fucking cold.
Spring and autumn are nice. But Wonwoo has a pollen allergy so he can’t enjoy the blooming season even if he wants to.
So if someone asks what his favorite season is, he always says autumn.
Wonwoo isn’t sentimental enough to actually have opinions about seasons. Like he said, he doesn’t like summer and winter because they’re extremely hot and cold respectively. He doesn’t mind spring but he has pollen allergies. And so he’s left with autumn.
It’s all just practical.
But, if there’s one season that actually means something… it’d also be autumn. And it doesn’t even have much to do with the actual season. It’s the memories it carries.
Yeah, that’s what he’ll call it.
Memories.
Because no matter what–
“Get going, will you?” Someone grumbles and goes past him.
Right, another reason why he hates summer. People get (rightfully) annoyed all the time and everyone wants to hang out near the Han river, him being one of them.
What can he do? He was already outside due to prior meetings, it’s hot, and being near the body of water sounds like a good idea if there’s any. He just happens to be in the area and he supposes why not. It’s been quite some time since he’s spent some time outside by himself, anyway.
At least he’s by himself so it’ll be much easier to find a seat. –Or so he assumes as he sighs, still trying to look for an empty spot to sit down ten minutes later. He doesn’t find any, if only because the only one-person spots available are surrounded by couples making googly eyes at each other.
Eventually, he finds one a little further away and settles there with his plastic bag filled with a canned highball and a bag of chips. It’s only somewhere after two in the afternoon, a weird time to be drinking alcohol, but he sighs blissfully at the first sip and stares mindlessly at the people around him.
He likes people watching, though he doesn’t make any grand scenarios about them in his head; simply thinks about how he’s only one of many in the sea of people. That he can be special but he chooses not to be. On the contrary, he likes to pretend that he’s normal; that he has a mark somewhere hidden on his body and he just simply hasn’t met his soulmate. That his dreams are simply dreams.
Or maybe they are nothing but dreams.
Maybe he’s simply thinking too much about them.
Maybe he’s just projecting the ideal life he’d have had he not been an outlier.
He blinks.
Why… had he not considered that before?
Sure, he feels too strongly about them (and Wonwoo isn’t even an emotional person) and is way too conscious because they feel real, but what if his head really is just messing with him? What if they really are just illusions and–
“Hey, sorry, do you mind if I sit here? Everywhere else is full and you’re the only one by yourself so…”
Wonwoo looks up at the weirdly familiar voice, freezing when he recognizes the person in front of him at once, the word coming out of his mouth before he even can stop himself.
“Autumn?”
Surprise colors your face at the name, your head empty because you honestly have no idea what to think. You don’t even have it in you to be suspecting, just very fascinated and somewhat nostalgic in the matter of seconds.
It’s been some time since someone calls you ‘Autumn’; the nickname that your late grandfather would always call you by because he said it’s his favorite season and you’re his sweetest grandchild. A few of your relatives adopted the name even though they outgrew it almost immediately after your grandfather passed. You’ve never told anyone outside the family about the nickname, not even your closest friends, as you’d like to keep it dear to your heart.
And it still stings to think about it after his passing ten years ago.
Several seconds–minutes?–pass like that, with you and this stranger looking at each other, mouth a little ajar, unsure what to say. But he breaks the silence first, shakes his head before he apologizes.
“Uh, sorry. You just–umm, uh, look like someone I know. You can sit down, sure.”
You nod and whisper a ‘thanks’, holding back the urge to ask him about his friend who apparently looks like you and shares your old nickname. But the silence that looms over you both is a little suffocating, and your usual extroverted self who never hesitates to talk to new people seems to die in front of him as you ponder if it’s okay to start a conversation with this handsome stranger.
Perhaps it’s just the weird interaction earlier, you think to yourself, the memory of your grandfather and your favorite nickname that no one except your family knows filling your chest with warmth. The last time you heard someone referred to you by that name was probably a decade ago, and to be referred to ‘Autumn’ again after so long… you wonder if you should’ve told someone about it if it inflicts this much fondness within you.
Or maybe it wouldn’t be so special if you had.
“So you have a friend who looks like me and is called ‘Autumn’, huh?” You try to maintain a confident smile, pray that you’re simply imagining the slight shake in your voice.
The stranger flinches a little, a gesture that you’re not sure what to make of, but then he nods and offers you an awkward smile. “Yeah, something like that.”
“You know, it used to be some sort of my nickname as a kid.” You’re not sure why you’re telling him this, but you are and it’s almost comical the way his lips open a little in surprise before he mutters a small ‘I see’. You offer your name to him, and thank him once again for letting you share his spot.
“Don’t mind it.” He smiles tightly before returning the gesture, and you can’t help but wonder why the name Jeon Wonwoo rings something in your head even though you’re sure you haven’t met this guy. You’re pretty good when it comes to remembering names and faces. You’ve never had any friends called Wonwoo, though you recall there were probably some people from your year in school and university who share his name.
Never a Jeon though. And he doesn’t look familiar at all, so you’re sure he’s not a friend of a friend that you might’ve seen in passing either, but… why does he feel familiar?
You shake your head before you let go of the thought, and then rummages through your bag to look for your drink. You take everything out of the way only to find your bottle lying sadly at the very bottom of your tote bag, when you look up again, you see Wonwoo glancing at the book you’ve put on the table.
On Soulmates: Love without Commitment
Xu Minghao
You hope the way you put everything back to your bag is subtle, like you’re not trying to hide the book you’ve been reading and the glimpse into your mind that people can easily decipher from your choice of literature alone. His face doesn’t tell you anything though, and it’s his next question that gets your heart beating in irregular beats.
“It’s quite the book, isn’t it?” He takes a sip from his can. “Gave me insights that I didn’t know I needed.”
“Right!” You reply with exaggerated enthusiasm. But can anyone blame you? Anyone who catches you reading that book always gives you the side eye, some people who are frontal even asked why you’re reading something that sounds as stupid as a flat earth. “I haven’t finished, but it’s so interesting to read why the author thinks soulmates aren’t it because it doesn’t give you a choice and everything about the relationship is a given. That perhaps the love that people who don’t have the soulmate marks might be purer because they choose to love and they put effort into it. I’m currently on chapter 7 and–”
You stop when you realize you’re rambling, words of apology on the top of your tongue when you see Wonwoo tilting his head in question. Not in judgement because you’re enthusiastic about it. Not in annoyance because you talk too much when it hasn’t even been twenty minutes since you’ve met him.
“Why are you stopping?” He asks, further making you speechless with the genuine interest in his voice. “Chapter 7 is about fate and destiny, isn’t it?”
You cough a little to hide your flustered face, a little too excited to finally find someone that isn’t against you reading this essay. You’ve been wanting to talk about it with someone–anyone–, all those hours you’ve spent on countless communities online with people who share the same sentiment as you not being enough.
“Yeah. I’m almost done with the chapter, though I haven’t been able to pick it up again these days.”
Wonwoo hums, seemingly deep in thought before he asks you again. “What do you think about it?”
“Fate and destiny?”
“Yeah.”
“I think it’s bullshit.”
He looks at you in surprise; whether it’s because of your choice of words or because of your opinion, you don’t know. But he doesn’t look like he’s going to jump at you for having such an opinion, so you continue even though he didn't ask you to.
“I’d hate to think that someone–something out there has enough power to decide what’s going to happen to us moving forward. That everything we do is predestined and that we have no choice whatsoever in life because it’s fated to be and it’s thanks to the universe that something happens a certain way.” And then you add, your voice comparably smaller as you suddenly realize you’re being too open with this stranger. “It feels… confining…”
He nods as he opens his bag of chips, putting it right in the middle as if telling you it’s okay to take some.
“I agree.” He doesn’t meet your eyes as he says this, looking straight over the Han river like he’ll find an actual answer there. “If it’s true, it’s very cruel for some people to know that their life is fated to be miserable and can do nothing but accept it.”
“Right? And, personally, I don’t know how I feel about the soulmates concept. You know how in the book it says that soulmates might take each other for granted because they’re meant to be together? Or that they simply accept the other person because, apparently, they’re their person? What if the universe messed up and you’re paired with a serial killer or something?”
Wonwoo looks at you alarmed, and you laugh before you say that you’re just speaking in general. He hesitates before he asks, unsure about where you actually are when it comes to soulmates. Are you this opinionated because you don’t have a soulmate? His heart skips a beat at the thought of it; or perhaps you simply hate the idea of it regardless. But before he can actually ask the question, his eyes fall to the side of your neck, and he notices the strings of flowers on the side of your neck, something that you also notice–so you clear your throat to dart his attention away.
“You feel… strongly about it, don’t you?” Wonwoo settles it at that, not wanting to offend you somehow. He doesn’t deny the mixed feeling in his heart as he realizes what it means. You have a soulmate. Even though there’s a chance that you don’t want them, you still have a soulmate and whatever feeling that’s brewing on the pit of his stomach, it’s not a good one.
What was he expecting, anyway? That if somehow he found you in this lifetime–which he did, what the fuck. It’s you who found him, even–you’d happily take him in your arms? The bitter taste on his mouth is getting worse by the seconds, only now realizing that even though he’s been wishing he’d find you, he never has any real plan about what to do if he actually did.
It helps that he doesn’t actually think he would, so he can hold on to it like a dream that would never come true. Something he holds dear in his heart but doesn’t really need to take responsibility for because it’s not going to happen. Something that somewhat keeps him going and some sort of wishful thinking.
You shrug, not offering any explanation.
He doesn’t press.
“I think.” He begins, looking at you this time, and if anyone ever asks, you’re going to deny the way your heartbeat picks up and up and up the more he looks into your eyes, your face getting hot like a high school girl with a crush. “You can always go against your destiny if that’s what you choose to do. If fate and destiny actually exist, who is there to say that what the universe has decided for you is your best path? Perhaps it’s just one of many and you can try taking another road to see if you’ll like it more. Even if they exist, it doesn’t mean you have to follow them all the time.”
You lay in bed thinking about his words that night, wondering if it’s as easy as he makes it to be to get away from your path and try a new one.
You dream of Wonwoo, a birthday cake, and a ginkgo leaf mark that you’re sure was not on Wonwoo’s wrist when you saw him earlier that day.
You wake up wishing you’ll meet him again.
Joshua, you’ve always known, is the ideal partner that anyone could ask for. He’s sweet, he takes care of you well, is respectful, and you honestly feel bad for not returning even half of what he feels for you.
You love him, you really do, but you don’t think what you feel for him is strong enough to be considered in the same league with the love that people believe soulmates should have for each other. It’s nowhere near there.
You love him, he’s very important to you, and you’ll drop anything for him if he needs you. But you know something’s wrong when Joshua starts talking about living together, marriage, and family, and dread is the only thing that fills your chest.
You know something’s wrong when you don’t feel the butterfly nor the fireworks that everyone–and you mean everyone–says they experience when they meet their soulmates.
It was nothing like that for you; you knew he’s your soulmate, and if there’s anything right about what people said regarding your first meeting, it’s true that it just clicked that it’s your soulmate in front of you. But your heartbeat picked up for all the wrong reasons that didn’t have anything to do with rush of excitement nor romantic expectation. You were a little anxious, even, but you couldn’t do anything when Joshua immediately recognized the feeling once his eyes met yours and he ran to you like he’d give you the world right that very second.
There was nothing magical about it.
You’re not sure how you feel either about the universe giving you the perfect partner by theory, but also somehow shaping you into a person that believes the whole soulmate thing is bullshit. It doesn’t seem to matter whether Joshua notices your lack of romantic reciprocation or not, because Joshua still treats you like you’re the love of his life and he looks at you like you’re his whole galaxy.
Or perhaps he mistakes the way you care for him as romance?
What a fucking drama you live in.
“What got you thinking?” You blink at his voice, and Joshua looks at you amused as he settles right beside you despite the heaps of empty space on your sofa. “You’ve been zoning out a lot these days.”
“Have I?” You ask, accepting the way his arm automatically goes behind you on top of the sofa head. You like his warmth, you really do. You like–no–you admit that you love a lot of things about Joshua and you’re glad you met him even though you absolutely abhor the soulmate system.
You love his eyes, the way they seem to stare into your soul and are able to tell what’s inside your mind most of the time.
You love his hands, they always know to wrap around yours when you need it most, pull you closer when you stray away because something distracts you along the way.
You love his voice, so calm and soothing that you would ask him to talk you to sleep through the phone on nights sleep refuses to find you, the way he’ll hum when he’s in a good mood though he never actually sings in front of you because he says he can’t carry an actual tune otherwise. (Two years since you’ve found each other and you’re still on a mission to make him sing because you just knew he sings well.)
But, most of all, you love the way he treats you.
The way he’ll ask if he’s not sure what you want him to do, the way he’ll carefully thread through your mood when the day hasn’t been good, and the way he gives you space even if he wants to be near you all the time.
He respects you. Not only as his soulmate but also as a person, and you can’t thank him enough for that.
Perhaps that’s why it hurts much more now; why guilt is eating you inside out because you can only think about Wonwoo and his words when Joshua is right next to you, his thigh pressed against yours and his thumb caressing your shoulder over your shirt.
If fate and destiny actually exist, who is there to say that what the universe has decided for you is your best path?
You force back the tears before they can actually form, gulping before you tell him it’s nothing.
“Should we go out?”
“Where?”
“Hmmm. Namsan? We can take a walk, get you off your mind.” His smile is kind, and you feel like crying again because of how considerate Joshua is. He doesn’t even ask, doesn’t push even once just in case you’ll crack. He simply accepts that you don’t want to talk about it and offers you something that might help.
Why the fuck aren’t you in love with him when he’s your soulmate and he’s as perfect as someone could be?
His arms envelop you and thrust you into his chest before you could break, and you manage to hold it for three full seconds before the tears stubbornly fall and you whimper softly into his hold. Joshua doesn't say anything, doesn’t hush you and asks if you’re okay.
No.
He accepts that you’re not okay and you don’t want to tell him about it. That you’re crying and he feel so fucking useless because he can’t do anything to help you with it.
That you’re hiding something from him that’s possibly making you cry even though you never did before.
Still, he holds you close and lets you cry.
You grasp the front of his shirt as you try your best to stop your tears. You don’t even know why you’re crying this much, but you suppose between the stressful week and the whole Wonwoo situation, the guilt combined with Joshua’s innocent look trigger something within you.
“I’ll just get you some water.” He whispers against your head once you’ve calmed down, squeezes your shoulder and then lets you go. He’s back not even a minute later, and you thank him as you take your mug, embarrassed when you wipe the remaining of your tears off your face. “Feeling better?”
“Yeah, sorry about that.” You manage to whisper, too embarrassed to even look him in the eyes.
His smile is meant to be comforting, but thinking yet again about the reason why you even cried to begin with, it only makes your heart squeezes painfully.
“You probably need it. You know I won’t judge.” He caresses your cheek as if to make sure to get rid of all traces of tears there. He searches for your face, as if he can tell what’s inside your mind just by doing so, and for a moment, you’re afraid that he really can; that he’ll see the man that you’ve met once some time last week clouding your mind like there’s no tomorrow. “Do you want to go for a walk anyway? Perhaps you need to get out of the house for a bit?”
“Yeah, you’re probably right.” You reach up to circle your fingers around his wrist, smiling back at him because despite everything, you’re still thankful that the universe thinks you’re deserving of someone like him. You’re still thankful that you get to be on the receiving end of his affection.
Joshua leans forward to kiss your forehead, lingering for a good few seconds before he tells you to get ready.
It doesn’t take you too long to get ready, nor does it take long for you two to arrive at Namsan. Climbing the stairs to get to the park, Joshua asks instead if you’re willing to just go further up to get to the peak where the tower is. You’re not exactly dressed for climbing (though it’s really just stairs, stairs, and more stairs), nor are you in the mood for it, but you think exhausting your body is just what you might just need so you can pass out the moment you reach your bed later on.
He extends his hand, and you take it with a smile despite the pinch in your heart. You spend the first ten minutes in silence, hand in hand as you ascend up the seemingly never-ending stairs.
Already out of breath, you begin to doubt your decision of climbing up when Joshua speaks.
“I haven’t gone here in so long.” Undeniably, it’s a very nice weather out. You being out of breath has more to do with your lack of exercise on a daily basis more than anything, but even in your predicament you can still appreciate the night view around you. As much as you feel like dying right now, you know you don’t actually regret it.
“Yeah? Me too.” You grip his hand tighter for support, then ask if you could rest for a bit when you see a rest stop. Joshua laughs as you ask this, though he nods and hands you a piece of chocolate the moment you both sit down on an empty bench overlooking Seoul from where you’re at.
“You’re a lifesaver.” You moan as you take a bite of the chocolate, leaning your head on his shoulder and stretching your legs. “I haven’t climbed in so long. My legs will fall tomorrow, I’m sure.”
“I’ll run a bath for you before I go home tonight.”
You try to trample the way your heartbeat picks up; not because you’re fluttered, but because you’re once again eaten with guilt by how perfect Joshua really is. He doesn’t exactly know how you feel about soulmates; you’re not cruel enough to say things right to his face.
But you know for sure that he’s aware of your choice of literature.
He doesn’t comment on them, and you try not to read them when he’s around. But he once caught you reading on your phone over your shoulder and you sheepishly said you simply find those essays interesting.
Joshua isn’t stupid, knows that there’s a reason why you find them interesting, but he chooses to be in ignorant bliss and says you’re free to read whatever you want and there’s no need to justify yourself to him of all people.
Yeah, because it’s totally normal that your soulmate is interested in reading essays on why soulmates are bullshits.
Forty minutes later with some short breaks along the way, you finally reach the top. There aren’t as many people, and you walk around for a bit to let your legs relax before finding yet another bench to sit on.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been here at night.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhmm. Sure is different from being here during the day.”
“It is, isn’t it?” Joshua agrees, his palm absentmindedly caresses your thigh as if it helps relieve your sore muscle.
“Should we have some cup ramyeons?” You suggest, pointing to the convenience store you pass by earlier. “I think I can do some if I share with you.”
Joshua nods, but before he can offer to go, you tell him he can rest instead.
“I’ll go get it. Should I buy two or are you fine just sharing one with me?”
“Two is fine.”
“And the usual drink?”
“And the usual drink.” He grins. “You sure you can take everything by yourself?”
You roll your eyes in mock annoyance, exhaling a ‘duh’ as you tell him to just wait.
Pleased that the convenience store isn’t crowded either, you hum as you go through the snack isles instead. Knowing yourself, you’ll probably only eat two thirds of the cup ramyeon and wolf down the snack instead if you buy some; but you don’t see why not because Joshua’s there to finish your food anyway. Plus, it’s a nice night out and that’s enough to justify your choice of dinner.
Juggling two big cups of instant noodles, a packet of cheese, a hotbar, and a bag of shrimp chips isn’t your talent, but you manage and you drop them on the cashier before quickly telling the cashier you’re just going to grab a drink real quick.
Almost bumping into the person behind you, your apology is stuck in your throat once you realize who’s the person exactly.
What the fuck.
“Oh…” Wonwoo says in surprise, the words seemingly out of his mouth before he even realizes. “Hi…?”
You give him an awkward smile and nod before quickly going to the drink aisle. Apologizing once again to the cashier who’s still scanning your purchase (and to Wonwoo) once you return even though it’s barely been five seconds.
“Need help?” Wonwoo says good-naturedly, gesturing to the amount of things you’ve just bought.
“Hey, I–”
Wonwoo looks at you staring between him and the guy who has just entered. Getting the hints immediately that his help isn’t needed, he smiles before paying for his stuff and leaves the convenience store.
He looks spitefully at the night sky, it’s so unnecessarily pretty too, unsure if he wants to curse whatever’s up there that of all days he decides to go outside, he just has to see you again. With another guy at that. He doesn’t want to jump to conclusions. The guy could simply be your friend for all he knew.
But if there’s one thing that is Wonwoo, he’s quick to put pieces together. From your panicked glance and the way you tense when you see him, he knows. Perhaps it’s also just intuition. But he just knew that man, whoever he is, is the one that heaven has decided to be the one for you.
He exhales a deep breath before finding a secluded place somewhere behind a tree, carefully hidden to minimize any chance of being seen by you (or seeing you with your soulmate). He would’ve immediately left if he could, but he’s only arrived and it feels like it’s such a waste for him to leave just like that despite the situation.
What even is the situation?
He’s been thinking a lot since he met you, if he wants to seek you out again and what he wants to do if he does. The thought is no longer so much of a wishful thinking like it used to be. He knows you exist now. You’re actually living, you’re real, and you have a soulmate that is not him.
It sounds so much like an exaggeration, but he’s never felt so empty after going home that night, thinking about you and your soulmate. Do you live together? Do you care about him regardless of your stance on the whole soulmate thing? Does he treat you well? Does he get to hold you while you sleep? Does he–Fuck.
Wonwoo hates being like this, and he’d love to say it’s gotten better the more time passes by, but it has only gotten even worse because his dream is getting longer and even more prominent since meeting you. And what he hates most is he’s started to feel more and more strongly about you even through his dreams.
What is one supposed to do when they fall in love with an illusion that has a counterpart living in the realm of reality? He’s pretty sure no one would have the answer.
He glances up at the sound of faint laughter, seemingly so loud in the silent night, or perhaps he simply picks it up because he knows exactly who it belongs to before he even sees you. He bites his lip at the scene he’s witnessing: you, laughing with your soulmate at god knows what.
He can’t blame the guy for looking at you like you hold the universe for him. After all, Wonwoo would probably do exactly the same thing had he been given the chance. His past self from another life could vouch for that.
Fortunately, or unfortunately, he’s not sure, you end up sitting a good distance away from where he’s at, your back facing him as you settle beside the man destined to be with you. You’re not too far that he can’t see your side profile, which gets his heart both squeezing in pain and fluttering at the same time.
He doesn’t even know that was possible.
Wonwoo looks far to the distance, at the endless night sky that’s so unnecessarily full of stars today of all day. He wants to think the universe is mocking him, playing a joke on him for being alone by himself on such a beautiful night, making him watch you laughing with your soulmate as the cherry on top.
But he knows he’s not that special.
He’s just one of many; his misery wouldn’t be all that amusing for the universe.
Scoffing at the thought of the universe, he lowers his eyes from the sky only to accidentally meet yours.
Is this the work of the universe too?
Nah, he shouldn’t give too much credit to the damn thing. But, then again, blaming it for every single thing that went wrong in his life has proved to be some kind of comfort if he’s being completely honest.
You offer him a small smile anyway, not even waiting for him to return the gesture.
It hurts still to see you with your soulmate, sharing food and talking about what he assumes to be nothing and everything. But as he lays in bed that night and thinks about your smile, he admits that if the universe lets him meet you in this lifetime, perhaps it isn’t so bad, after all.
Wonwoo has always liked the number three.
Third’s time the charm and all that jazz. He doesn’t hold on to it religiously, just some fun little routine that he finds amusing. When he takes an item in a grocery store, he takes the third one from the front; when he goes to the convenience store because he needs one (1) thing, he takes two small snacks so it’s three items in total; on the rare days when Wonwoo feels like trying a new drink in a cafe, he’d just choose the third item in the menu.
It’s fun.
Today, Wonwoo’s supposed to meet Mingyu for a little get together. He’s the first friend he’s made in Seoul, a guy that’s a little too flashy for his liking but is still a good person nevertheless and definitely a much better company than most people that he’s made to be acquainted with in the new city.
He’s not too excited about the invitation, but doesn’t see why he should turn the younger guy down when he has no plan during the weekend, and, as much as he loves staying inside, the four walls of his apartment is starting to feel a little suffocating because it’s almost been a month since that night he randomly went to Namsan and saw you, and… he hasn’t gone out for anything that’s not a necessity since then.
So when Mingyu asks for the third time since they got to know each other if he wants to join him on a night out or not, he decides he should also appreciate the guy’s persistence despite already being turned down twice before.
Anyway.
He was supposed to meet him for a little get together. Apparently, Mingyu’s version of ‘a little get together’ is to invite a group of friends that Wonwoo obviously doesn’t know for dinner and only notifying him of the additional party thirty minutes before their promised time.
He exhales. It’s too late for him to bail. Right now, his hope is only as high as the ground: he simply wishes he wouldn’t return home socially exhausted.
It’s a small pizza diner inside an alleyway where they promised to meet. And Mingyu along with his friends thankfully arrive at the same time as him so Wonwoo wouldn’t need to go inside and look around like a fool, wondering where his table full of strangers and a slightly familiar friend is.
He’s not close enough with Mingyu to say he’s comfortable around him, but he’s still the most familiar face between the four faces in front of him so he decides sitting next to Mingyu is the best choice. Thankfully, the younger guy doesn’t seem to be the type to push him to interact with new people immediately.
Thirty minutes into dinner, Wonwoo can tell Mingyu probably brings these friends around because he thinks Wonwoo needs to meet new people (or maybe he thinks it’ll be awkward if it’s just the two of them?). It’s easy to tell that he’s brought the friendliest people who’s just loud enough, who understand that Wonwoo’s quiet but still able to naturally included him in conversations without making him feel bad about being, well, quiet (god knows how many people have tried to make him feel bad for staying quiet during conversations).
Jungkook is a friend from high school, he’s learned, apparently one of Mingyu’s closest friends. Jeonghan is a senior from his previous company; someone that he didn’t know he’d end up being close with because, at first, Jeonghan was obviously just someone he had to work together with. Jisoo, he finds out later on, is Jungkook’s ex-girlfriend before he found his soulmate, though they treasure their friendship too much to cut each other off.
Except for Jungkook, the other two friends seem a little unconventional and Wonwoo doesn’t understand how Mingyu ends up being close enough with them to go out together like this.
He doesn’t ask.
“We’re planning on bar hopping.” Mingyu tells him, and Wonwoo feels dread fill his chest at what this might imply until Mingyu adds, “You’re free to leave if you don’t want to go with us though! I understand it might not be everyone’s thing.”
Weirdly, Wonwoo now wants to go because he’s been given the freedom of choice. Plus, at least he knows he’d be surrounded by these people and he can go home at any time if he wants to.
“What kind of bar?”
“Definitely not clubs pretending to be a bar.” Mingyu jokes. “Maybe wine or cocktail bars?”
“Sure, I’ll come then.” Wonwoo shrugs, then tells Mingyu he’ll probably return home first if he and his friends are planning to go until morning, to which Mingyu nods and says that it’s no problem at all.
Wonwoo doesn’t really understand the concept of bar hopping. He’s always been curious about it, but never curious enough to actually do it. So he supposes it’s also his curiosity that pushes him to say yes. He kind of wants to see what it’s all about and he doesn’t think he’d have another opportunity where he might remotely enjoy the experience if not now.
The first cocktail bar isn’t that great, if only because the place is small and it feels like everyone can hear what they’re talking about. They each have one drink and immediately leave for the next one. They go to a wine bar, and Wonwoo is pleased to know the alcohol in his system (and the current company, he’s sure) has made him more relaxed than he had been the past week.
After an hour or so, Mingyu decides he’s had too much energy and asks if it’s okay to move to an open bar that’s not as noisy as a club but is still noisy enough for people to enjoy the music and fill the dancing floor.
Normally, Wonwoo would say no. But he surprisingly still has enough social battery and thinks might as well go all out while he’s at it. It’s not often that he’s in a social mood.
The bar is a little too noisy for Wonwoo’s liking, though the half part of the building has no roof so it’s not too loud nor suffocating. After ordering their drinks, Mingyu and Jungkook head to the dance floor. Jisoo and Jeonghan stay at the table with him; Jisoo says she’s not really in the mood to dance while Jeonghan says his soulmate is picking him up in a bit so he’s just going to stick around til then.
It’s thirty minutes later that he leaves and Wonwoo’s now left alone with Jisoo. It’s not uncomfortable, but it is a little awkward and Jisoo seems to share the sentiment as she tries to find topics to talk about.
They end up talking about literature and movies, and Wonwoo has to lean forward to be able to listen to her clearly over the music until she eventually moves to sit next to him so they can talk easier. He notices Jungkook glancing every now and then, and when Jisoo follows his gaze, she chuckles a little and shakes her head.
“Sorry. It’s just a habit of his, don’t mind him.”
Wonwoo blinks, unsure. “Why are you apologizing?”
“I know a lot of people find his stares uncomfortable.” She shrugs. “He’s just protective of me. It’s nothing, I promise.”
Wonwoo’s not nosy. But between the alcohol in his system, his remote curiosity, and the way Jisoo looks like she wants to talk about it, he kindly throws the bait.
A subtle one, though.
“How did you end up being close with Mingyu?”
“Through Kook, at first.” Mingyu and Jeonghan don’t refer to Jungkook with that name, he notes. And a part of him wonders if it’s a nickname that Jisoo has for him or if it’s just how his girl friends call him. “We dated before. But we broke up because, well, he found his soulmate and… Mingyu was kind enough to keep me company and made sure I was okay after the whole ordeal. I’m not sure why he felt the need to do that, but I’m thankful regardless. So… yeah.”
He bites the question about soulmates. Doesn’t ask why they tried dating each other if they knew they aren’t soulmates, but he does wonder about how she must’ve felt or how she’s feeling right now. He can’t exactly compare his situation with hers, because as much as he’s going through a… heartbreak, it’s somewhat onesided while Jisoo actually had a relationship with Jungkook.
And she still has to be friends with him.
He doesn’t know if it’s the universe or Jungkook that is cruel.
Or perhaps Jisoo is a masochist.
Apparently, she’s also very honest when she’s tipsy.
“I’m an outlier.” She smiles bitterly after downing a shot, then she pulls up the sleeve of her cardigan and shows him what he assumes to be a trace of a soulmate mark; a faint outline of a snowflake that’s barely visible unless you actually take a look at her wrist. “I hav–had a soulmate. They died before I even met them and that’s why the mark… burned.”
Her chuckle is nowhere near amused when Wonwoo’s eyes widen in surprise, and she answers before he even asks as she pulls down the sleeve of her cardigan.
“It literally burned. I was sixteen; and I was out with Jungkook getting ice cream when it started to burn and he had to witness me being all hysterical, crying as I told him my wrist burnt and it felt like it’s going to fall off.” She doesn’t look bitter at all as she talks about this, just very sad and perhaps even a tad bit nostalgic. “He was fourteen. A little shorter than I was at that point, but he tried his best to tug me to a secluded place so people wouldn’t stare despite my struggle because everything hurt and I just felt like crying, hugged me to muffle my scream, and stayed with me for hours after that even though I was just zoning out, not saying anything.”
Wonwoo isn’t sure if it’s a story for him to hear; but Jisoo looks like she needs it (or is it just the alcohol?) and the least he could do is to listen. At least he can rest easy knowing this story wouldn’t be going anywhere else.
“I knew what happened even though I didn’t know by theory. I could feel it; felt the connection that was only faintly there just… gone. Jungkook took me home and told my parents about what happened. Of course they knew what it meant and they thanked him before sending him home. I couldn’t really talk for weeks, the emptiness and the burn were too prominent for me to be doing anything. My parents told the school I was sick so I was dismissed from classes.”
She pauses, and for the first time, Wonwoo can tell exactly what she’s feeling: she’s numb and she’s exhausted. There’s no trace of tears in her eyes. They’re void of anything and Wonwoo suddenly feels an odd sense of affinity the more he listens to her.
“Jungkook… stopped by everyday even though he didn’t know what actually happened. He probably had an idea, but he didn’t press and he talked to me about anything and everything even if I didn’t say anything–said from the beginning that I didn’t need to answer, that he’d do all the talking for me.”
Wonwoo doesn’t need to listen to the rest of the story to know why Jisoo still treasures Jungkook as…, well, whatever she regards him as right now. He doesn’t want her to talk about more sad things like how she ended up dating him and how she broke up with him, so he offers her what he could: honesty and a change of topic.
Even if it’s only a little.
“I’m an outlier also.” He says quietly that Jisoo almost misses it. “Doesn’t have a soulmate but… it’s complicated.”
Thankfully, Jisoo doesn’t pry, simply takes another shot and offers a cheer to him.
“Sucks to be us.”
It’s weird, but Wonwoo finds himself chuckling before he takes his own drink and clinks his glass to hers and takes a sip of his highball.
“Sucks to be us.”
His mind wanders to you, thinking if he could stand being in Jisoo’s place had it been like that for him. He had only seen you with your soulmate from afar, had only talked to you once, and it hurts anyway.
Why is he cursed with the memories of his previous life, again?
He’s been mentally restless since that night. How could he not when he keeps on seeing you everywhere? His dreams are getting more and more prominent and so are his feelings. He keeps on thinking he sees you somewhere–everywhere–only to realize it’s not you, just ghosts of you haunting him in every person that he sees.
How fucking stupid, falling in love with a series of images and illusions.
Drinking the rest of his drink, he shakes his head and winces at the alcohol and at how his mind is playing tricks once again. Perhaps drinking alcohol hasn’t been the best option if he ends up imagining you even here between the blurry images of people.
Fuck, he’s down bad.
In such perfect timing, Mingyu and Jungkook return to the table, so Wonwoo leaves Jisoo with them and excuses himself to the restroom. He looks at himself in the mirror, and then looks at his phone only to realize it’s already almost one in the morning. Perhaps it’s time he goes home; the talk he’s shared with Jisoo proves to be more mentally exhausting than he thinks it is.
He almost bumps into someone on his way out, hands reaching out to the person in front of him in reflex only to let go just as quick once he sees your face once again. Christ, is he that drunk? He really needs to go home.
That version of you is very pretty too, fuck.
“Uh… Wonwoo?” He’s even imagining your voice now? “Are you… okay?”
He looks up in alarm once he realizes you’re real. It’s actually you in front of him and you’re not a figment of his imagination. He opens his mouth to say something, but someone bumps into you hard and you tumble into his chest.
Wonwoo’s breath is caught in his throat at the turn of events, but his arm catches you anyway and glares at the guy before he looks down and asks if you’re okay. You look as flustered as he’s feeling, and he hopes the loud music is enough to cover the sound of his heartbeat.
“You’re okay?” It’s stupid how disappointment fills his chest the moment you step away, a sense of longing already making its way to his heart.
He needs to get away.
“I—yeah.” You look unsure and Wonwoo doesn’t like how your body screams uneasiness.
“Are you by yourself?”
“No?” Now you sound unsure, and even though Wonwoo is also another stranger in the sea of strangers, he thinks he trusts himself better than any other people here to help you if you don’t want to be here. “Well, I was with my friend but she… yeah.”
You’re biting your lip, as if afraid he’d scold you (Why would he? He’s not your boyfriend (Wait. No. Back pedal, back pedal)). Fuck, fuck, fuck. He swallows hard to calm himself down; this is not the time to imagine what it’d be like to be your boyfriend.
“Come on.” He says as calmly as possible, his fingers balled into a fist to stop himself from taking your hand in his. He considers bringing you to his table, but he doesn’t know how he should introduce you to his party so he quickly texts Mingyu he’s going home because something turns up before he leads you out of the club.
It’s silence filling you two despite the somewhat noisy alley you’re walking through, and you don’t know Wonwoo enough to be able to tell if he’s pissed or what; but he does seem tense and you’re the one uncomfortable with the unnerving silence.
“I’m–I’m sorry.” You try to open a conversation. Wonwoo stops in his tracks and turns to you in confusion. “You were probably there to have fun or something… Sorry I made you get me out of there.”
He shakes his head, and your heart relaxes when he smiles a little. “It’s fine. About time I go back anyway. Do you mind if we stop by a convenience store for a bit?”
It’s then that you realize you’ve been blindly following him. You don’t even know the guy. You’ve met him twice before, and your second meeting barely even lasts five minutes, yet you readily follow him because you know you’ll be more comfortable with him than there–more safe, more… secure.
Fuck, you didn’t even ask him where he’s taking you earlier. It was almost automatic the way you followed his steps. You try to convince yourself that it’s his familiarity that makes you feel safe. Because even if you don’t know him that well, his face is still one imprinted in your head so it’s normal that you’d feel safer than you would with any other person in that club.
Plus, you’ve talked to him once before and he at least passed the vibe check, right?
But as you pile these thoughts in your head, trying to justify the uncalled feeling of security this stranger brings you, deep down you know why exactly your anxiety seeps away at the sight of him earlier, why your shoulders drop down in relief, and why your chest is no longer filled with dread.
“Here, have this.”
That’s why. You think to yourself.
Wonwoo isn’t smiling at you, but there’s a kind of warmth that he radiates as he hands you a drink and ushers you to sit on the table in front of the convenience store. There’s a certain warmth that reaches you as he sits in front of you and places a hot bun on the table, pushes it towards you without saying anything.
You watch him slot his hands into the pocket of his jackets, and you suddenly wonder if he gets cold easily. It’s not that cold outside, though you suppose it is one in the morning and the wind picks up a little at times like this.
“Thanks.” You mumble as you wrap your fingers around the small bottle of warm honey water. You can’t help but smile at the drink of his choice, a little funny how he didn’t get you a hot chocolate or tea; something most people would usually get. “Can I ask why honey?”
He blinks, as if not getting what you’re talking about until you hold up the glass bottle for him to see.
Wonwoo panics a little. He has bought the drink without thinking, a part of his mind that stores the information about you from his dream making him do so. In fact, it was only yesterday that he dreamt of you drinking one.
The dream is still vivid in his mind. He dreamt of you sleeping, and he assumed he was trying to sleep himself when you jolted awake out of nowhere, eyes frantic and hands flailing around looking for him. He saw himself whispering words of comfort to you, and he saw you burying yourself into him like there’s any space between the two of you before he pulled away and said he’d get you some drink from the kitchen.
You had smiled weakly at the sight of your favorite drink, a warm honey water that always comforted you at nights like this.
“Do you not like it? I can get you something else if you want?”
“No, it’s fine.” You smile, something inside you blooming dangerously at his words and what you may or may not be implying with yours. “Just… I usually drink those too. Some of my friends judge me for that.”
He’s more surprised about the fact that you share this with your past self more than anything, but, still, he asks. “Huh? Why?”
“Just because it’s unusual, I suppose.” Shrugging, you proceed to open the lid and take a sip. “Not a lot of people drink this, you know? Or, at least, they drink it cold. I prefer it warm.”
He wonders if you share anything else with your past self. So far, there’s been two: Autumn and this drink. Would you be suspicious if he threw it out there? Would you freak out?
“Someone I know eats watermelon only if it’s frozen; I’m sure it's just a preference on your part.”
You smile shyly as you answer him, an image that’s forever burned into his mind. “I do that also.”
His mind runs a thousand hundred scenarios of what this could mean, wonders if it’s simply a coincidence or if the universe is on to something.
“Aren’t you special,” he smiles tightly, hoping that you don’t catch upon his awkwardness.
“Thank you for putting it that way.” The sound of your laughter makes him want to be selfish; to drag out conversations and spend as much time as possible with you even though he knows you have a soulmate. Is it considered cheating like this? Is he immoral for wanting this? “My friends also judge me because I don’t like cheese cake, cheese sauce and anything cheese flavored even though I don’t mind an actual cheese.”
“You… don’t like cheese cake?” Wonwoo blinked, unsure if he heard right. He wasn’t a cheese lover or anything, but he didn’t think he’d ever seen anyone who grimaced at the word ‘cheese cake’.
“They’re too… cheesy.”
“Autumn, it’s called cheese cake for a reason.”
“And the texture… yuck.” You grimaced before telling him to stop talking about it before you lose your appetite.
“Are you judging me too?” Your voice snaps him out of his gaze, and he blinks a few times before he shakes his head no. This can’t be good, fuck. It’s been less than 10 minutes since he’s been talking to you, and yet his heartbeat is out of control and the fact that you share a lot of things with the illusion of yourself that he’s developed an attachment for isn’t good at all.
He tries his best to remind himself that his feeling isn’t real; that perhaps he’s too blinded by something that he’s been holding on to and he doesn’t know what to do now that it’s somewhat changing. That he’s confused and he shouldn’t do anything that would cause him further confusion.
But with you in front of him, as real as you can be, smiling and launching into a bunch of topics that is actually dear to his heart, he can’t help but indulge his feelings and bask in your presence, in your smile and your voice, in the sound of your laughter and the way you lean forward so you can speak to him better, a habit that he notices the you in his dream also had.
So he lets go.
Whatever consequence that awaits him, he’ll face it when it comes. Right now, he just wants to pretend like you don’t have a soulmate who’s probably waiting for you back home–who may be worried sick because you haven’t looked at your phone even once since the moment he sits down in front of you.
Wonwoo isn’t usually selfish and he hopes that the universe will let him go this one time for wanting to be–for wanting to keep you to himself even for a limited time. Even if you aren’t aware of it.
This chance might not come again, he tells himself. The chance of talking to you under the stars in front of a random convenience store at ungodly hours, like you’re just two people talking to each other–like soulmates isn’t a thing and he’s free to feel whatever it is he’s feeling.
He wants this, he realizes as his eyes flicker down to your lips for a few seconds, subtle enough for you to miss. He wants a real memory of you. Something real that he can keep to his heart, something that isn’t a part of his dream and a fragment of his memories. And even though he’d go home feeling empty and he’d curse himself tomorrow, it doesn’t matter because what matters now is that you’re here with him and he’s going to take as much as you’re willing to give him.
“I’ve finished reading the book, by the way.” You open another topic. A controversial one, if you may say so yourself, and you know deep down what you’re trying to do by saying this even though you’ll deny it if anyone asks.
“Oh yeah? How do you find it?”
“I think I agree with most of what he said.” You bite your lip, your mind wandering to Joshua for the first time since you saw Wonwoo. “I just… I don’t know. I’m not anti soulmate, I just don’t see why you should succumb to your… instincts? Feelings? And simply accept your soulmate without thinking too much about it.”
Wonwoo doesn’t say anything for a moment and you wonder if he disagrees with you or if he’s simply gathering his thoughts. He seems thoughtful, perhaps trying to find words that won’t offend you before he offers you his opinion.
“Can I ask why you started thinking that way?” he asks instead, and it’s your turn to be silent and arrange your words.
Because you don’t know.
You can’t tell since when do you feel this strongly about the soulmate situation. You used to be quite indifferent about it, not having any opinion whatsoever though you sure weren’t as excited as the other kids your age when it came to romanticizing anything about soulmates.
Your friends would talk about their dream scenarios of the first meeting with their soulmates, or they would go on and on about looking forward to meeting them.
But you were never that excited.
It was just another thing in your life: like eating ice cream or trying out a new cafe. There’s nothing so special about it.
“I think…” You contemplate, wondering if you want to be that honest with this beautiful, familiar stranger in front of you. “It was when I met my soulmate?”
Wonwoo seems surprised, probably not sure how to interpret your words and you don’t blame him at all.
“Sorry?”
“You know how people say that there are… fireworks? And butterflies? Just those big, grandiose feelings blooming inside your chest at once when you meet your soulmate?” He nods, trying to see where you’re going with this. “Well, I… didn’t feel those when I met mine. Sure, it all made sense and it just kinda… clicked in my head. Like a moment of eureka, if you will. But I wasn’t… excited or anything of the sort. If anything, my heartbeat picked up because I was anxious, already worried about what he might expect of me and all that.”
You refuse to look at Wonwoo. You’re not sure what kind of answer that you expect from him, but he doesn’t seem like he’d judge and, between the ungodly hour and the little alcohol that’s left in your system, it feels relieving to finally be able to say this out loud.
You’ve never been able to. Not only because people would call you crazy, but because you know no one wouldn’t not judge you for it.
But here in front of Wonwoo… Jeon Wonwoo who you’ve only met for the third time in your life, you feel safe for reasons that you can’t comprehend.
So you continue. You’ll blame it on the alcohol tomorrow morning, even though you know you’re not intoxicated enough for it to be the case. You’ll justify yourself by saying Wonwoo isn’t a friend and he knows no one in your life–that if this goes south, you technically wouldn’t lose anything.
Yeah.
That’s how you’ll go down this road.
“I mean… I love him, you know?” You would’ve seen Wonwoo’s face drop had you not been busy staring at your nails, still too afraid to look at him despite the resolve you’ve made. “But not… that way.”
“Like… platonic?” Wonwoo offers, careful.
“Yeah…” You bite your lip, trying to stop the tears that suddenly blur your eyes. “Like platonic.”
You hate yourself for the way your heart lightens at your own words. Because even though it’s something that you’ve thought of once before, you bury it so deep somewhere you can’t reach. You never say it out loud to anyone; never admit it to yourself even though you know it’s true.
And to say it like this to another person–out in the open… You hate yourself so fucking much because it’s true and you’re somehow going to hurt Joshua even if you don’t mean to.
Wonwoo panics at the sight of your tears, at the way your lips tremble and the way he’s sure your nails are digging into your palms. He doesn’t know what to do, unsure about what he can do because you’re…, he winces as he thinks to himself, not even a friend.
What is the appropriate distance he needs to keep? Is he even allowed to comfort you? He can’t even be relieved at your revelation because you’re obviously not fine and there’s something churning at the pit of his guts the longer he sees you try to stop yourself from crying.
It’s when a sob eventually escapes your lips that he stops thinking. Because how can he stand still when you’re there crying like you’re admitting a crime worthy of a death sentence? When you can’t even lift your head because you’re trying so damn hard to hide your face and your tears?
He hears you gasp when he wraps his arms around you, something that he wishes you’re okay with, and if there’s anything Wonwoo would describe as magical, it’s the way you perfectly fit against him as you press yourself closer for comfort, your forehead on his neck and your tears warm against his skin. He’s sure he’s just making things up, but it feels like there’s a soft wind going through his whole body, leaving trails of goosebumps on his arms.
It’s probably not the most appropriate moment for him to be feeling that way, but he doesn’t have time to be guilty because it seems like you somewhat share the sentiment–pulling away like you’re electrocuted before you look at him wide-eyed and gaping.
“Won–”
“I’m an outlier.” He cuts you off, riding the rush he’s feeling across his body and letting his honest words get out before he can think too much. He doesn’t know why but he feels like he should tell you and he should do it right now. “I don’t have a soulmate and–”
“Kiss me?” There’s urgency and a slight tremble in your voice as you ask this, fingers grasping the material of his shirt tightly like it’s your lifeline.
“But your soul–”
“Wonwoo, please?”
It’s hard to tell who moves first, or perhaps you two move at the same time, but the moment his lips meet yours, Wonwoo would like to retract his statement earlier about your embrace being magical because it’s nothing compared to this.
It’s absolutely nothing compared to the thousand fireworks exploding in his chest at different intervals–never stopping and electrifying in the most pleasant way possible. He doesn’t know it’s possible for humans to feel this way. Is this what people with a soulmate feels like when they meet their soulmate? Isn’t this what you said earlier: fireworks and butterflies?
It’s not even butterflies in his stomach. He’s pretty sure there’s an earthquake down there. But, the most important of them all, it feels right and it makes sense even though it shouldn’t be.
The longer his lips move against yours, your fingers grasping the front of his shirt to pull him closer while his fingers thread through your hair to pull you closer, the more it feels like… fuck, he hates to say it but, it feels like it’s meant to be.
It’s only because you both need to take a breath that you pull away, and Wonwoo doesn’t think it’s possible for his heart to run even faster than it already is, but it is because, Christ, the way you look like you’re in a trance and your slightly swollen lips are doing things to his heart that he has never experienced before.
It’s a mystery how long you spend looking at each other like that in silence, wrapped against each other without saying anything. He wants so badly to just kiss you senseless once again, but the gears in his head are starting to turn and he knows the right thing to do is to talk.
You have a soulmate. But you asked him to kiss you and he did. And it was magical and all the good things he’s heard before, but it’s not supposed to be… right?
“What was that?” You whisper, more to yourself than to him. “I… I don’t understand?”
He whispers your name softly, trying to pull away only for you to pull him closer again, your eyes full of distress and your body tense, a complete 180 from how you were just seconds ago.
“W—why?” You look at him like he has an answer. But he doesn’t, because he’s not even sure what you’re asking about and he’s still trying to find words to say. “This… this is what they say about–about fireworks and… and butterflies but… you’re not my soulmate? What does this mean?”
Wonwoo tries once again, this time reaching out to caress your hair to calm you down. It helps, because your shoulders visibly relax and he reminds you to breathe. You refuse to let go of him though, and his heart squeezes painfully at how shaken up you seem to be.
“Hey, I’m–I’m not going anywhere, okay?” He tells you softly, trying to appear calm even despite what he’s feeling inside. But he can’t show it. Not when you look so lost and your feelings are presumably all over the place. “I’ll just… get some stuff inside. I’ll be back in a minute, I promise.”
True to his words, Wonwoo comes back not even a minute late with a pack of tissues and two water bottles. He opts to sit right beside you as he hands you the tissue and opens the water for you.
“Here, drink this.”
“Thanks.” You murmur quietly, embarrassed now that you’ve (somewhat) come to your senses. There’s a thousand questions running through your head, some of them hateful, loathing yourself for asking another guy to kiss you when you have a soulmate who’s probably worried sick at home because you haven’t texted him at all since you left the club.
But you have more pressing matters at hand–like why did Wonwoo actually kiss you, and why did it feel like how people around you have been describing what it feels like to be with your soulmate? And… Did he say he’s an outlier?
“Feeling better?” His voice is meek, like he’s not sure if it’s okay to talk to you. But you’re too all over the place to think about politeness and whatnot. It’s a trainwreck inside your head. Your head isn’t dizzy because you’re overthinking; it’s dizzy because you’re thinking of too many things at once–it’s thought after thought after thought after thought. They’re colliding and everything’s a mess.
“You felt that too right?” is the first thing that you manage to say and it’s only after you say it that you realize how horrifying it would be if Wonwoo says no.
He nods, albeit hesitantly, but you don’t really mind because you’ll take anything right now. “It’s… what was that? Why… Why do I feel it with you but not Joshua?”
Joshua is your soulmate, Wonwoo registers in his mind, and he looks at you helplessly, his heart dropping a little at the mention of his name. Should he tell you? About the dreams and the memories? He thinks the dreams and the memories are simply, well, dreams and memories after he met you and Joshua all those nights ago.
Perhaps he really is just an outlier, a special one at that, but that’s about it. He has trampled any hope of making something out of his dreams when it’s clear that you belong to someone else in this lifetime. The universe that gifts him the memory of his past life with you, one that arranges another meeting in this lifetime with you, is the same fucking universe that decides you have a soulmate and it’s not him.
What the fuck was he supposed to do?
But with how he–and you, apparently–feel earlier, he doesn’t think it’s a meaningless coincidence.
He might’ve considered it as one if it was only him feeling it. That he might’ve been desperate and any contact that he was to have with you would simply be magical because it’s nothing but an illusion on his part.
But you?
You’ve just said you feel it too, whatever it might be. And he feels a glimpse of hope even though the whole situation is completely fucked up and there’s no way to get around it without hurting anyone.
How would you feel if you knew?
Would you freak out?
Would you hate him for hiding it?
Would you think he was planning something against you?
Would you laugh at his face and call him crazy?
“You know something.” Your voice brings him back to reality, your eyes searching his face. You don’t sound accusing, you sound downright confused and, dare he says, a tad bit hopeful. “There’s something you’re not telling me… right?”
Wonwoo takes a deep breath and braces himself for whatever he might need to face afterwards. He owes you that much, he thinks to himself. To a certain extent, his memory is your memory, and if you’re as distraught as you seem to be, he hopes this would help you somehow.
“I remember my past life.” He says as calmly as he can, carefully hiding his fear somewhere behind. “They come to my dreams. I thought it was just dreams at first, but they’re… memories and they’ve been getting longer since I met you. Clearer, too.”
It’s hard to say why you’re not freaked out, why you simply believe him like it’s not the craziest thing you’ve heard in your life. But if the universe can decide two people are destined for each other and grant marks to people to seek their other half, why should this be regarded as impossible?
“Did you… know me in your past life?”
Wonwoo smiles bitterly, and it takes everything in you not to reach out to cup his cheek–tell him that he can be honest and you’re going to listen to him no matter what.
“Do you really want me to answer that?”
“As honest as you can be.”
“I might sound crazy.” He whispers, basking in your touch. “This… might affect you in a bad way.”
“Crazier than you remembering your past life?” You smile a little as you say this, which he returns. He appreciates your attempt to lighten up the atmosphere, and he reaches up to take the hand that was cupping his cheek, his fingers tighten around yours before he braces himself once again.
“You were my soulmate.” He rips the bandaid in one go, afraid that he wouldn’t be able to say it otherwise.
It’s hard to describe what you’re feeling: your breath is caught in your throat, the revelation means more than you thought it would. But it’s not shock that’s filling you up. No. It’s recognition, acceptance, and tears because things finally make sense.
“I promised you that I’d find you again in our next life and–”
It finally fucking makes sense why you always feel like there’s something missing in your life, why Joshua’s arrival doesn’t fill it up even though you secretly thought it would; why you feel that pull with Wonwoo since that first time you met him.
You remember that day still. You were just taking a walk, there was no plan whatsoever to sit around and spend time out in the open when it’s so hot outside. But you had seen him by himself, and it felt like time stopped for a few moments and you were enchanted. You felt compelled to look at him–to approach him and ask if it’s okay to take the empty seat on his table.
It wasn’t magical, your first meeting, but something about Wonwoo had pulled you in and you didn’t even try to question it.
The shock you felt when he called you ‘Autumn’ never really died down. And while you tried to convince yourself that it’s simply because it had been a long time since someone referred to you with that name and it was a nickname that is so dear to you, you could feel deep down that there was something else.
And then there was that dream.
Wait.
Right, that dream.
Is that dream…?
“Ginkgo leaf?” You whisper out of nowhere, trying to recall what you saw all those nights ago. “Was that your mark? In your previous life… was that your mark?”
It’s his turn to look at you in shock, the way he’s gaping at you wide-eyed giving you the answer you were looking for.
“H–how?”
“I had a dream, once.” You’ve never felt this vulnerable in your life, but how can you not be when it feels like you’ve just found the reason you’ve been seeking for your whole life? “It was… that night we met… at Namsan. It was your birthday and we were celebrating with a cake and–”
“Hey, breathe?” Wonwoo cuts you off, and you squeeze his fingers in return, only then realizing that you’ve been holding hands the whole time. “Take your time, okay?”
“And I saw the ginkgo leaf on your wrist…” You finish, trying your best not to glance at his wrist even though you know it’s not there. “I didn’t get to see mine though, and that’s why I didn’t assume you were my soulmate.”
“I see…”
You hate how defeated he sounds. And for all the time you’ve been doubting the universe, questioning its means and cursing its ways, you don’t know what to do right now.
Should you be cursing it some more for putting Wonwoo in that position? For making you feel the way you feel only to find out the reason why is because your heart is apparently caught in the past? What does this make Joshua? What does this make your entire relationship with him?
You ask about his dreams, and even though Wonwoo is hesitant at first, he gets more comfortable the more he relays them. And you feel like crying because, apparently, all of them are about you. There’s not one single dream that doesn’t have you in it, and it feels like a punch to your guts to know that he has to live his life with this replaying in his mind, that he can’t even talk about it to anyone because he doesn’t want to risk it, that he’s been keeping something this big for his whole life because he doesn’t really have any other choice.
You grief about the memories you don’t have. About what could’ve been and about the pain Wonwoo has to go through by himself because the universe has arranged you to be with someone else when he’s been seeing pictures of you with him in his dreams.
“What… what do you think we should do?” You throw the question out there, hope that someone has the answer. But Wonwoo stays silent, and he looks at you with eyes full of yearning that wrenches your soul. You know what he’s trying to say. You’re the one who has a soulmate. Whatever that he might want with you, what he might’ve imagined throughout the entire time he has those memories, they all don’t mean anything because you’re off limits.
“I don’t… think there’s anything that we can do.”
“But–”
“It’s okay.” He shakes his head with a sad smile. “I didn’t… I wasn’t expecting anything. I didn’t even think I’d be talking about this with you.”
“But, still!” You’re grasping his hand tightly–as if he’ll be gone if you let go even slightly. “This… this has got to mean something!”
“You have a soulmate.” He reminds you, his voice shaking. And tears blur your eyes once again at how resigned he sounds, but can you blame him? The universe has fucked him up in more ways than one, you would’ve lost it a long time ago if you were him, but here he is, taking care of you still even though it might make things worse for him.
“Do you love me?”
Wonwoo exhales deeply, pressing his lips together to hide the fact that they’re trembling because he’s so close to tears.
“I know my past self loved you more than life itself.”
“Do you love me?”
“Look–I…”
“Because there’s—there’s clearly something because my heart feels like it’s about to burst and I already want to be with you all the time.” You cry as you honestly bare yourself in front of him, as you tell him all the emotions that have been going through you since the kiss you share with each other minutes ago. “I don’t… I’ve never felt like this before and I’ve always questioned why–wonder what went wrong and if there’s some kind of mistake. But I couldn’t do anything because supposedly he’s my soulmate and I’m supposed to accept that. Because it’s a given and it’s obvious and there’s just no fucking reason for me to question it.”
Wonwoo lets his tears fall as you say all this, his hands warm against yours and he relishes at the way you’re holding on to them tightly, like you want to convince him that there’s something–some way to go around this.
“But you just gave me a reason to question it now.” You sob, reminding him about the talk you had the first time you met each other.
If fate and destiny actually exist, who is there to say that what the universe has decided for you is your best path?
You must look absolutely hideous right now, with tears all over your face that won’t stop no matter how many times you wipe them. But you don’t care, because you finally feel content with him beside you. Because even though it’s selfish and you would need to figure out the whole Joshua situation, you’re not going to let go of the person who finally makes you feel complete, who makes you realize the things your friends have been saying are all true: that it just makes sense, that it’s practically binding to the point where you even hate to think about having to separate with him after this night ends.
“You told me I could always go against my destiny if that’s what I choose to do. Why are you not letting me? Do you not feel it?”
“I do. I swear, I feel it too.” He wipes the last of his tears and calms himself down, makes you panic when he tries to let go of your hands only for his palm to rest warmly against the side of your face. “But you have a soulmate and it’s not something that you can decide by yourself. It wouldn’t be fair to him, don’t you think?”
“Has the universe ever been fair to you?” You ask him, wondering how he can still have this much consideration for someone who he should’ve harbored ill feelings for.
“It leads me to you, doesn’t it? In two different lifetimes too.” He smiles and caresses your cheek, wiping your tears also.
“Please stop making me cry.” You whisper weakly, certain that your eyes will be red and puffy once you’ve stopped crying.
Wonwoo chuckles at this, and the sound of his small laughter brings a smile out of you despite the tears.
“I’m not saying you’re not in your right mind. But perhaps… we’re too high on our emotions right now, don’t you agree?”
You don’t. You really don’t. But you get what he’s saying so you nod and instead bask in the way his thumb is caressing the apple of your cheek.
“So what do you suppose we should do?
“You… might want to think this through and have a talk with… Joshua.” It’s bizarre to hear Joshua’s name from Wonwoo, but you know he’s right and if… if you want to try whatever it is you’re going to try with Wonwoo, you don’t want to do it in hiding and you don’t want to betray Joshua’s trust and respect more than you probably already have at this point. He might hate you, he might not accept it, but you have to at least try and a part of you believes Joshua would understand somehow. “And then we can decide from then?”
“Okay…” You close your eyes and lean forward to rest your forehead against his shoulder, feeling his arm pulling you closer and trying to memorize his scent and his warmth to calm the erratic beat of your heart. “Okay.”
Wonwoo takes you home, sitting a good distance from you in the taxi like you both weren’t pressed against each other just minutes prior. But you know why he’s doing it, and you still appreciate him for going with you just to make sure you’ll go back safely even if he doesn’t have to.
For the first time that night, your mind wanders to Joshua. About how you should approach the subject with him and all the consequences you might need to face afterwards. It’s not going to be pretty even if Joshua somehow understands: what would you say to your family? To his family?
But you can’t let go of Wonwoo. Not now that you’ve met him, that you’ve found out what his existence means to you and you’ve felt all the magic you’ve been hearing from other people.
You wonder now if the reason why you’ve questioned the whole soulmate system is because it doesn’t apply to you personally. Because you didn’t feel the pull and all that should’ve come along with the first meeting.
Now that you’ve felt it with Wonwoo… You glance at him, which Wonwoo catches almost right away. He smiles at you, though you can tell his eyes are full of worries, his mind probably elsewhere. You don’t blame him though, what has transpired tonight is beyond the two of you; it’s only right for him to be out of it.
You suddenly feel like one of those stupid main characters in a romance movie, one who would throw everything away for a man they barely know. But your heart knows Wonwoo, yearns for him before you even know it. In a world where two people are destined to be together… you don’t think it’s stupid of you to want to do this.
When the driver tells you that you’ve arrived you hesitate before you get off, not wanting to leave Wonwoo. But he smiles in encouragement, tells you that you have his number and you’re free to text him after you’ve figured things out.
He omits Joshua from his sentence, but you know that’s what he means.
“Hey.” He calls for you right when you’re about to close the door and reaches out to squeeze your hand once, letting go before you can return the gesture. “Don’t rush it, okay? Take your time. I’ll be waiting. You know I’m good at that.”
Wonwoo waits.
Days turn into weeks and weeks turn into months.
There’s a reason why he gave you his number instead of asking for yours.
He wants you to be ready before deciding anything, wants you to make the decision that you think is best for you.
He knows he’d call you right away if he has your number, to make sure you’re okay and to see how you’re doing.
But that’d be even more painful, he feels like. More painful than a thousand scenarios going through his mind because he’s by himself. At least like this, he knows it’s nothing but scenarios that he comes up with; nothing is real and it’s all in his head.
Like his dreams.
Like his memories.
He exhales as he looks at his phone once again, waiting for your message that isn’t coming.
The third time Wonwoo meets you might be the last time he sees you, after all.
Three months later, October comes around, yellow leaves telling him that autumn has arrived. Not his Autumn, obviously, and he glares at the ginkgo tree he passes by that is still annoyingly green even though everything else has started to turn yellow.
The third week of October, you finally text Wonwoo, apologizing for the time you took and asking if it’s still okay to see each other even though it’s been months since then. He says yes, of course, and you’re currently sitting anxiously in the taxi on your way to his place.
You don’t know how Wonwoo is going to take what you’re about to tell him and you don’t think it’s wise to be having this conversation out in the open; hence why you’re thankful that he agrees when you ask if it’s okay to talk in the privacy of his walls.
“Hi.” He opens the door, offering you a small smile that you return tightly. It’s weird that you immediately feel at peace in his presence despite the anxiety that has been building up in your chest.
“Hi.” You press your lips together, exhaling a deep breath before you apologize to him once again. “Sorry it took me quite some time to text you. I didn’t want to… rush, like you said.”
“It’s okay.” You know it’s not, you can tell by how tense it is and how forced his smile seems to be. Plus, it doesn’t take a genius to know why he looks like he hasn’t been getting decent sleep because you know you probably would’ve looked the same if not for your makeup.
He ushers you to come in, tells you to sit down on the sofa and offers you a drink, in which you say you’re fine with just water.
Wonwoo returns with a cup of warm tea though, and he says that he’s put some honey in it, that you look tense and hopefully the drink helps.
“I figure you’ve made up your mind?”
Truth be told, you can’t even begin to imagine what’s been going on inside Wonwoo’s head. You offered yourself to him only to go missing for three months straight, not even a text that tells him that you’re okay and you’re not forgetting him.
But you didn’t want to text him when things were uncertain, not with what happened right after you got home–with what went down between you and Joshua.
You couldn’t.
That’s why you’ve only finally managed to text him a few days ago. With things being in the clear, you can finally talk to him and decide what’s going to happen moving forward.
“Give me a chance to explain?” You look at him hopefully.
“I wouldn’t tell you to come if I wasn’t going to listen to you.” His smile lifts parts of your tension, and you take a deep breath before you begin, already having imagined this conversation a hundred times in your head.
“Joshua was there when I came home that night.” You bite your lip, already feeling like crying as you recall that scene in your head. “He was on the floor, passed out. He wouldn’t wake up no matter how much I shook him, and I realized he was clutching his neck–right where our soulmate marks are. It was hot, like it was burning before, and I called the hospital right away and–”
“Wait–burning?”
“Yes and… and the mark was fading and it was only hours later that I realized mine was fading also.” You swallow hard at this, a painful wave crashes against your heart as you recall his face when he came to, when he told them what happened and when they told him what actually happened.
“It just… started burning out of nowhere.”
The doctor glanced at you, your eyes were puffy from crying even more than you already did before that, your fingers tight against Joshua’s because you thought you’d lost him.
“Did you feel the burn also?” The doctor pulled you out after Joshua fell back asleep, a conclusion already knitting itself together in her mind. There’s no way you’d be fine enough to stand on your own feet if you had felt the burn, but still, she had to make sure before jumping into conclusions.
“No…” You sniffled. “I… was out with… a friend and he already passed out when I came back home.”
“No pain, at all?”
You shook your head, mentally and physically exhausted after everything that had happened in the last twenty four hours.
“No. I–He’d be fine, right?” You asked in desperation. “What… what happened, exactly?”
“We need to run some more tests. But… you’re sure you didn’t feel anything at all?”
“No, I didn’t. I really didn’t. Does that mean anything?”
“They… they said it’s the universe… taking our marks from us.” You force a smile just right after the first tear falls, your feelings still all over the place even though almost three months have passed since then. “Apparently, it had happened before. Though it’s been fifty years or so since they last heard of a case. They couldn’t really tell why it happened because there weren’t many cases to study and compare, but I felt like… I might have an idea why it happened so I met the doctor privately and told her about you.”
Wonwoo holds back the urge to reach for your hands that are balled into fists, to free your lower lip from your teeth because he’s sure you’d bleed if you bite down just a tad bit harder.
“She said that there’s a possibility that I was right. That… the universe is rearranging my soulmate because I met you. It’s not unheard of, but it’s not something that you’d even find in books because it’s some sort of myth at this point.”
You look up to meet his eyes. His heart breaks at how sad you look, and the protective feeling from three months ago when he saw you crying at one in the morning returns at once. He’s not sure if it’s okay to comfort you this time around though, because by the way you’re relaying the story, he can’t tell at all where you stand exactly.
“I was debating with myself whether it would be better to tell him right away or wait until he got better. But Joshua… caught on easily that something bothered me and it just… came out. I didn’t say your name, and I only told him what he might need to know: that I met someone and it just… made sense.
It wasn’t easy. He was the one laying on the hospital bed but he was also the one comforting me. And I felt so bad and I kept on apologizing to him but he said it’s okay and he understood. That it’s not my fault because he knew I didn’t have a say in how I felt.”
From the thousand scenarios Wonwoo has imagined in the three months you left him in silence, this is not one of them. He can’t even begin to imagine how painful it must’ve been for Joshua, both physically and mentally. His mind takes him back to Jisoo, about what she said about the burn she felt and how it affected her after.
How could Joshua say that in his position?
For what it’s worth, Wonwoo is glad to know that you were meant to be with someone as caring as Joshua is–who is so understanding that he would withstand that kind of pain and said it was fine. That he doesn’t blame you for it.
But where does this leave the two of you now?
“He asked me what I wanted to do now that we’re… no longer bonded by the marks. And I told him honestly that I don’t want to lose him; that I still… love him even though it’s not how he expected me to. That I understand if he doesn’t want me around because it can’t be easy to look at someone who used to be your soulmate.”
You’re sobbing at this point, and he hands you some tissues to wipe your tears, reminds you to breathe before you continue.
“Can you… can you hold me, please?” Your voice is small as you say this, as if you’re uncertain whether you’re allowed to ask that. Wonwoo is glad you did though, because he immediately comes closer and pulls you into his chest, offering you whatever comfort he might be able to give that way. “Sorry, I just–”
“Shh. It’s fine.” Whatever the outcome of this conversation may be, this is the least he can do for you. And perhaps a little for himself also, because it’s painful to see you cry and not able to do anything at all. Because he’s been dreaming of hugging you–the you in this lifetime, not the past one–and he’s not going to pass any chance that’s presented in front of him even if it might be wrong. He still doesn’t know how your talk ended with Joshua, but if you asked him to hold you… that should mean something, right? “Take your time. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Promise?” You sniffle, pulling away to look at him.
“It is my place, so.” He tries to joke to help you relax, and it works because you weakly hit his chest before you exhale another deep breath and continue after Wonwoo makes you take a sip of your tea.
“He… He’d like to keep me around too.” You say quietly, your tears now replaced with hiccups. “But not now. Because it still hurts and… and he says he’d contact me once he’s ready.”
“And how do you feel about that?”
You shrug, burying yourself further into his neck. Is it bad that it feels so right to do this already? Is it bad that you’re doing this when you’re still trying to move on from your guilt?
“I honestly have no idea… But… Well, he says he wants me to be happy with you and that he doesn’t want me to not give you–us–a chance because I feel guilty towards him. That… what’s done is done and he’ll eventually be okay.”
“He’s very kind, isn’t he?” He comments instead, unsure how to feel after everything you’ve said. A big part of him is relieved, but it’s still hard to be completely happy when he knew it cost someone the kind of pain that would last a lifetime.
“The kindest.” You smile for the first time, agreeing with him. “I think that’s also why I’ve always had this guilt within me, you know? Even before I met you. Because I just know I can’t return his feelings but he was supposed to be my soulmate.”
“I understand.” He whispers against your head, leaning his cheek there. “Is that also why it took you three months to text me?”
“Partly… yeah. I ended up taking care of him until he got discharged, and we decided to just… talk to our parents separately about what happened and what… might happen moving forward. And then I spent some time arranging my thoughts and cleaning up his stuff from my apartment. I haven’t given them back to him, but they’re all in a box in my place. So… yeah. Sorry for not texting you at all.”
He hums and holds you tighter, feels the way your arms are also hugging him in apology. He doesn’t press about your parents, he supposes you would’ve talked about it if you want to. But you’ve just relayed a very emotionally loaded story which must be very exhausting in itself.
“I did tell you to take your time.” He says, a smile blooming into his face at what he says next. “Thank you for coming back to me.”
“Thank you for letting me come back to you.” You say instead, pulling away from him to meet his eyes. Your eyes must be puffy from all the crying, gosh, you seem to be crying all the time when you’ve only seen this guy four times in total. You wonder if you were this much of an emotional wreck too in your past life, but you decide against asking about it because it does not matter now.
Your past lives might be the one that eventually leads you to each other; but Wonwoo has probably had enough stories regarding the past life and you don’t see why you should talk about it when you have the future in front of you.
“They’ve stopped, you know?” Wonwoo suddenly says.
“What have?”
“The dreams.” He presses his lips together and looks at you for comfort, which you readily give as you squeeze his shoulder. “They don’t appear anymore. Like, completely stopped. I do dream of you, but not… you from the past life. Just you.”
“How do you know it’s not me from the past?”
He takes your hand before he answers, gently lifts it up to point at your empty wrist and smiles.
“Because there’s no mark on your wrist.”
“Ah… right.” You lean forward to rest your forehead against his shoulder, and you spend a moment like that: your body pressed against each other and the ghost of his lips on top of your head.
It’s then that you whisper, a little afraid but also hopeful–perhaps even excited at what the future might have in store for you two.
“Are we really doing this?”
“A little too late to not do this, I think.” He jokes, which earns him another hit on the chest and a glare that doesn’t affect him at all. He cups your cheek and looks into your eyes, making you shy from the sudden attention. “If you want it then I want it. Easy as that.”
You press your lips together and bask in his stare, get lost in his eyes as you finally try to let go of the guilt holding you down and focus more on the certainty that you felt that night you tried to convince Wonwoo to do something about your situation.
“I’ll be okay.” Joshua reassured you for the nth time as you dropped him off his place, your second home that you probably wouldn’t be able to visit until an indefinite time. “Don’t worry too much about me, okay? You know how I am.”
“I’m really–”
“I don’t want you to apologize again.” He cuts you off, his voice stern. “I don’t blame you, I really don’t. I’m happy to know you’ve met someone that has made you complete. I’m sorry for not being able to do that to you. It must’ve been hard for you all those time, hm? So try to be happy now. Don’t think too much about me. I will be okay, trust me on that. I’ve never gone back on my words, have I? I don’t regret the time I had with you and I don’t want you to feel guilty for not feeling a certain way.”
“Let’s do it, then?” You say, wanting to make sure like there’s any way Wonwoo would say no. “Fuck the universe, right?”
Wonwoo laughs and gently squishes your cheeks before he nods, his forehead leaning to rest against yours, his breath warm against your face even though his lips aren't touching yours just yet.
“Fuck the universe, indeed.”
It's later that night that you point at the inside of his wrist and gasp when you check yours: identical marks of a twin gingko leaves intertwined with each other adorning your wrist and his.
Wonwoo grins.
His Autumn is finally here.
©wonwoonlight – all rights reserved. I don’t allow any reposting, translation, and any other kind of redistribution of this fic. Please tell me if you’re aware of anyone doing this without my permission.
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pls tell me if you wanna be removed btw it's totally ok, no hard feelings!!
A/N 2: well, if you're reading this, thank you once again!! i have never written this trope before and i honestly can't tell at all if you'll like it or not. but i wrote this for wonwoo's birthday, so hopefully i'll have it in me to accept it if it's not your cup of tea. but anyway, it's been some time since i write anything this long also--didn't even know i had it in me to still write anything this long, and it kinda made me realize that... this might be my last long piece for a quite some time. it's not easy to write this, to see my notifications everyday and see less and less feedbacks while the likes take up 95% of them. i've said it before, but it gets discouraging the more it goes. i'm not announcing hiatus or anything, but i hope you know where my blog stands at this point. happy birthday once again wonwoo, my muse, the loml 🥰💕
#caratwritersclub#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo angst#seventeen scenarios#seventeen angst#seventeen fic#seventeen fluff#seventeen scenario#seventeen au#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo au#wonwoo fanfic#wonwoo imagines#seventeen x reader#seventeen imagines
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