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pucksandpower · 14 days

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MILF

Toto Wolff x wife!Reader

Summary: Toto knows his wife is a MILF … but this doesn’t mean he is okay with his son’s friends calling you that

Warnings: teenage boys doing teenage boy things

Based on this request

“Pass the schnitzel, darling,” you say to your husband as the three of you sit down for dinner. Your teenage son has just gotten home from school, and you can’t wait to hear about his day.

Toto smiles at you as he passes the platter of breaded veal. “How was school?” He asks.

Lukas shrugs as he takes a bite. “It was okay,” he mumbles through a mouthful of food.

You give him a look. “Don’t talk with your mouth full, sweetie,” you gently chide. Even though he’s almost an adult now, you still see your little boy in him.

Lukas swallows and straightens up. “Sorry, Mum.”

“So tell us about your day,” you prompt. “Learn anything new and interesting?”

Your son fidgets in his seat. “Well … some of the guys were talking about you today.”

You raise your eyebrows in surprise. “Me? What about me?”

Lukas glances uncomfortably at his father. “Just … stuff they saw online. Paparazzi photos from when we were on the yacht last month.”

Toto sets his fork down, his expression darkening. He’s no stranger to being in the public eye, but he’s always been protective of you and Lukas. “What exactly were they saying?” He asks in a carefully neutral tone.

“They, uh …” Lukas rubs the back of his neck. “They called Mom a MILF.”

“A what?” Toto sputters, while you have to suppress a laugh. You’re familiar with the crude term, given your substantially younger age compared to your husband.

“It’s not funny!” Toto says indignantly. “I won’t have people objectifying my wife like that.”

You reach over and pat his arm. “It’s okay, dear. I’m not bothered by it.” You turn back to Lukas with an amused smile. “I’m flattered those boys think your old mom’s still got it.”

“You’re not old!” Lukas protests loyally. “It’s just, you know, you’re a lot younger than Vati, and you’re really pretty, so the guys notice.”

Toto scowls, but you grin and blow your son a kiss. “Thanks, sweetie.” Your playful reaction seems to visibly relax him.

“This is unacceptable,” Toto shakes his head. “I should call the school. Get those little punks suspended for sexual harassment.”

“Oh Toto, don’t be silly,” you wave dismissively. “They’re just teenage boys. I’m sure they didn’t mean any harm.”

“It doesn’t matter!” He insists. “Your dignity and privacy should be respected, not exploited. People think because we’re in the spotlight that they can say whatever vulgar nonsense they want.”

You reach over again and lace your fingers through his, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “I know it bothers you, darling. But I married you knowing full well how public our lives would be. A little crude gossip comes with the territory.”

Toto opens his mouth to retort, then pauses, some of the indignation leaving his eyes. “I just don’t want anyone disrespecting you,” he says finally.

You smile softly. Even after all these years of marriage, your heart still flutters at his protectiveness. “I know. It’s one of the many things I love about you.”

Lukas makes a face. “Ugh, gross. Can you guys not be all mushy right now?”

You laugh and blow him another kiss. “Sorry Lukas. I can’t help it — your father’s the love of my life.”

Toto smiles back at you, the anger fading from his face. “And you’re mine, schatzi.”

Your son pretends to gag. “Seriously, stop. I’m trying to eat here.”

You chuckle and spear another bite of schnitzel. “Alright, we’ll behave. Now, tell me more about the rest of your day ...”

The conversation moves on to lighter topics as you finish up dinner. You listen attentively while Lukas fills you in on the drama with his friend group and his struggles in history class.

After clearing the dishes, the three of you move to the living room. You curl up next to Toto on the couch while Lukas sprawls out on the carpet to play video games.

You close your eyes contentedly and rest your head on your husband’s shoulder. Despite the lifestyle that being married to Toto provides you with, this right here is your happy place — your little family, spending a quiet evening at home.

Toto wraps an arm around you and presses a soft kiss to your temple. “Have I told you lately how lucky I am?” He murmurs.

You smile up at him. “Even after all these years, you still give me butterflies.”

“Good,” he says firmly. “I’ll tell you every day if I have to, until you’re sick of hearing it.”

Lukas groans loudly from the floor. “Could you guys be any more embarrassing?”

You and Toto both laugh. “What? I can’t tell my beautiful wife how much I love her?” He calls out in protest.

“Not when I’m right here!” Lukas complains. “Get a room or something.”

You grin mischievously. “That’s not a bad idea ...” you say, running a hand up your husband’s chest.

Toto’s eyes darken. “Minx,” he murmurs.

Lukas scrambles to his feet. “Okay, I’m out of here.” He gives you both a look of exaggerated disgust as he heads upstairs.

You and Toto chuckle as you listen to his bedroom door slam shut.

“Now, where were we?” Toto says in a low voice, pulling you closer. You bite your lip coyly as he presses his mouth to yours. No matter how many years go by, the chemistry between you is still electric.

You shift against him eagerly as the kiss deepens. His hands slide down to grip your hips, and you make a soft noise of pleasure. After nearly two decades of marriage, he knows exactly how to touch you.

“Tell me again,” you whisper when you finally break apart, slightly breathless.

Toto gazes into your eyes. “I love you,” he says sincerely. “I will always love you. Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

You kiss him again, tenderly this time. “I love you too, Toto. Forever.”

No matter what people say or how famous you become, your relationship has always been grounded in this — the unwavering love between you. The rest of the world falls away when you’re together.

You rest your head contentedly on his shoulder again, his arms wrapped around you. This right here, next to the man who still looks at you like you hung the moon, is home.

***

The next day after school, Lukas comes home with a few of his friends in tow. You’re just finishing up putting away the groceries when you hear the chatter of teenage voices approaching.

“Hey Mum, we’re gonna hang out downstairs,” Lukas calls out as the group of boys raids the kitchen fridge for snacks.

You smile and give them a little wave. “Hi boys. There’s more drinks in the pantry if you need it.”

The teenagers rumble acknowledgements through mouthfuls of food before thundering downstairs to your home theater room. You chuckle and shake your head. Teenage appetites are truly a phenomenon.

You’re straightening up the living room when you hear the front door open again, signaling Toto’s return from work.

“Hello, liebling,” he greets you warmly, sweeping you into an embrace.

You kiss him in welcome. “How was work today?”

“The usual madness,” he sighs. “But coming home to you makes it all worthwhile.”

You smile up at him adoringly. Even after all these years, your heart still flutters at his smooth compliments.

“Oh, Lukas has some friends over,” you mention. “They’re downstairs watching movies or playing video games.”

Toto frowns a little. “Those wouldn’t happen to be the same friends who were objectifying you?”

You pat his chest placatingly. “Now dear, we talked about this. Don’t make a fuss.”

“Hmph.” He still looks slightly disgruntled. “Well, I should at least go down and say hello.”

You follow him downstairs, where the group of teenage boys are sprawled out on the sofas engrossed in some action movie. Explosions boom from the surround sound system as CGI buildings crumble onscreen.

They look up when you and Toto enter. “Oh hey Mr. Wolff,” one of them says.

“Vati, you remember my friends right?” Lukas introduces. “Jason, Andrew, Ryan, and David.”

“Ah yes, nice to see you boys again,” Toto says smoothly.

Too smoothly.

You can sense the storm brewing beneath his polite façade.

Sure enough, as the teens’ attention returns to the movie, Toto clears his throat. “So I heard you boys were discussing my wife the other day.”

The room goes silent, save for the cinematic explosions still blaring through the speakers. The boys glance around uneasily.

“Um, we didn’t mean anything bad by it,” David finally offers timidly.

Toto raises an eyebrow. “Oh? So objectifying and sexualizing a married woman is not meant to be disrespectful?”

The teens squirm under his icy stare. You put a warning hand on your husband’s arm, but he continues.

“Let me tell you something about my wife,” he says, an edge creeping into his tone. “She is an elegant, successful, and highly intelligent woman. Not some piece of meat for you ogling schoolboys to drool over.”

The chastised boys all mumble apologies and stare fixedly at the floor.

Toto points a stern finger at them. “I trust there will be no further vulgar comments, or you won’t be welcome in this house again.”

“Yes sir,” they mutter. Lukas looks like he wants the leather couch to swallow him whole. You have to stifle a smile at your husband’s overprotective papa bear routine.

“Good. I’m glad we understand each other.” Toto straightens his suit jacket. “Now you boys enjoy your … movie.”

He turns and heads back upstairs, with you following after an apologetic smile to the shell-shocked teens.

Once you’re out of earshot, you swat his shoulder reproachfully. “Toto! Did you really need to traumatize the poor kids?”

“I didn’t traumatize them,” he huffs. “I just … explained a few things.” At your skeptical look, he amends “ … Firmly.”

You shake your head in exasperation. “You’re impossible. I thought I asked you not to make a fuss.”

He takes your hands earnestly. “I’m sorry, schatzi. I just can’t stand anyone disrespecting you. You deserve to be treated like a queen.”

You soften at the sincerity in his eyes. “Oh Toto. You’re too good to me.” You wrap your arms around him in a conciliatory hug.

He holds you close. “Nonsense. I’ll spend every day proving you’re the most important thing in the world to me.”

You snuggle against his chest, reminded yet again how lucky you are. Even when he overreacts, you know it comes from a place of devotion.

“Just promise me you’ll go easy on the boys,” you say wryly as you pull back. “I think you scared them straight for life.”

Toto smiles ruefully. “I suppose I did get a bit … intense. But the message won’t do any harm.”

You laugh and kiss his cheek. “My noble protector.”

He grins. “Proudly.”

Later, as the boys are getting ready to leave, Toto stops them at the front door.

“Before you go, I have one more thing to say,” he announces. The teens glance at each other nervously.

Toto looks each of them in the eye. “If I ever hear of you disrespecting my wife again, I won’t be so kind. You see, she’s actually a MIDF … Mother I Do Fuck.” He enunciates the words pointedly.

The teens’ eyes widen in horror, and Lukas turns bright red. “Vati!” He hisses in embarrassment.

Toto ignores him. “So I would appreciate it if you kept your crude comments to yourselves next time.” He gives them a tight smile. “Are we clear?”

The boys nod rapidly. “Yes sir. Crystal clear, Mr. Wolff,” one mumbles.

“Good.” Toto claps his hands together. “Then get home safely.”

After the front door shuts behind the fleeing teens, Lukas rounds on his father. “Oh my god, Vati! Why would you say that?”

He shrugs unapologetically. “I wanted to make sure they got the message loud and clear this time.”

Lukas just shakes his head in mortification before stomping upstairs.

You slide your arms around your unrepentant husband. “You just couldn’t resist, could you?”

“They left with a healthy dose of fear and respect,” Toto says smugly. “I think my work here is done.”

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sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog · 9 months

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I just read the article you posted a while back about TB (heads up- it said the gift article link has lapsed or some such). Did J&J ‘evergreen’ (be allowed to be evil) or was it allowed to become generic?

Relatedly, how do you manage empathy fatigue? I deal with OCD too and it screams at me that I have to care about and do all the things all at once. How do you choose where to put your time and energy?

(Also, when I get the coffee subscription for my husband’s birthday, which version should I get?)

For me empathy fatigue sets in when I careen my attention from this crisis to that one to the next one to the one after that, always feeling overwhelmed by each emerging problem but never having the time or attention to devote myself to one problem or another.

I'll give you an example. In 2014, a horrific ebola epidemic swept through Guinea, Liberia, and Sierra Leone. The world paid attention to it. Everyone was talking about it. And then .... it ended. At least in the global imagination. Money dried up. The world moved on to the next crisis.

That's not to say the next crisis wasn't important. It was important. But in Sierra Leone, the ebola crisis wasn't really over even after people stopped contracting ebola. 15% of Sierra Leone's healthcare workers had been killed by ebola, and the already fragile healthcare system plummeted into what one Sierra Leonean physician described to me as "a state of collapse."

And so the crisis remained a crisis even after the world's attention shifted. 1 in 17 women in Sierra Leone were dying in childbirth. Over 10% of kids born died before the age of five. Tuberculosis killed thousands every year despite curative treatment being available.

And this is when Hank and I finally, belatedly realized that responding to crises in the news was not adequate. Instead, we would need to commit the kind of long-term attention and long-term support that long-term crises demand. This means making difficult choices--there is also high maternal and child mortality in countries other than Sierra Leone, but we choose to focus on Sierra Leone because we see an opportunity to make a difference, because the government is serious if limited in its commitment to improving healthcare and educational opportunities, and because we had to make a choice or else we would be overwhelmed by the many causes.

What about the other causes? Well, we trust people to work on those causes. We believe in their importance. And we support their work by doing ours as well as we can, and trusting they are doing theirs as well as they can. I still get overwhelmed. I still get depressed. But I find that the deeper I go into my particular areas of interest--global healthcare delivery, health care accessibility, ending TB, fighting maternal mortality--the better I feel personally, and the more good I feel like I'm able to do.

2. Johnson & Johnson has not abandoned their secondary patents on bedaquiline but they have committed to allow generics to be available in most countries, even those where the secondary patents apply. Unfortunately this deal leaves out many countries that need generic bedaquiline, including Ukraine, which is absolutely unacceptable. So progress has been made, but the progress (as is so often the case) is inadequate. The fight goes on.

#tuberculosis #global health #partners in health #empathy fatigue

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paellegere · 1 month

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dean's sexuality is an overwhelming recurring theme throughout the show: his fetishes are prominent, he flaunts his sexuality and sexual behavior freely, he's a relentless flirt, and he has the most sexual encounters in the show. what i want to briefly consider here is how his sexuality and, more importantly, his fetishes may symbolize a freudian eroticization of a fantasized domestic life, particularly in his fetishization of femininity.

so hear me out: dean subconsciously eroticizes his mundane desires because he can't externalize them in a safe or realistic way. the desires are, namely, a longing for a domestic, "apple pie" life, which is a desire that has been explored in the show multiple times. dean routinely covets domesticity, through his desire to raise a child (ben and lisa subplot), the djinn fantasy (2.20), his "nesting" in the bunker (8.14), and his displacement of that desire onto sam (who is the primary subject of his erotic fixation in general and a subconscious extension of himself—if sam acquires a happy domestic life, dean can live vicariously through it).

he also routinely denies himself this domesticity because he's given up on getting out of the hunter life. he was raised in a survival environment and never was given a real opportunity to escape (even sam had to fight tooth and nail to get out, and we all know where that got him). the one time he had a chance to reject john and embrace normality he returned smiling because of sam (9.07). he's the one that vehemently secludes himself (and sam, like in 1.06) from society because connections are a liability. he leaves potential long-term relationships preemptively, always choosing hunting (and sam) over them before anything "real" can happen (1.13, 6.01, 6.21, also consider 8.19, perhaps more abstractly). he's so broken inside that he lacks any real desire at all (5.14). et cetera, et cetera. he denies himself his domestic desires to the point that he lacks desire at all—he's a broken shell of a man.

so the violent repression of the id causes the secret desire to leak out through erotic fantasy, a playground of fiction that is used by, well, most if not all people to explore desire in a safe and controlled medium (see: how many women have rape fantasies, for example—the sexual fantasy is a constructed world for safe exploration of certain desires, often abstracted through erotic symbols).

dean is so repressed as an individual, likely by external pressure to conform and control himself via john, that dean could subconsciously transform his secret desire for domesticity, into an erotic fantasy. he displaces those unacceptable desires from the unattainable mundane onto the safer erotic and they eventually distort into fetishes. the fetishes themselves are then abstractions of the things he covets but can't obtain.

and i want to focus specifically on his desire for domesticity and make an argument for feminization as a fetish (thank you rhonda hurley for your contributions to society) and how that relates back to that base desire.

there are several episodes in the show which suggest that dean fetishizes femininity itself, or rather feminization as it pertains to him (4.07, 5.04, also consider 10.05 in a more abstract sense). in 4.07, dean openly fantasizes about living in a "hot cheerleader's" body (youthfully feminine). in 5.04, dean recounts the time rhonda hurley forced him into her pink, satiny panties, saying that he liked it. 10.05 is a meta episode which additionally posits a plotline where dean becomes a woman through supernatural means, suggesting that fans are invited to draw a connection between dean and feminization. (these are the episodes i can pull off the top of my head; it's probably not comprehensive but i can't remember others atm)

so let's consider this feminization kink: we have dean fantasizing about femininity, womanhood, and especially girlhood, which he notoriously eroticizes (again in 4.07 and also in 4.13 and 10.13, to name specific references, but there are so many examples of this) in relation to himself, specifically. you can layer this in the way his deeper desires are of domesticity, and the home is traditionally (importantly) the domain of the woman. if dean would come to associate domesticity with femininity, then he would subconsciously connect his desire for domesticity with a desire for femininity. therefore, this feminization kink can represent an eroticization of his own (perceived) femininity. dean craves domesticity, but the domestic can only be achieved through womanhood, and therefore his desire for the domestic manifests through femininity, and thus feminization.

this "perceived femininity" of the domestic is important because of how dean conceptualizes the world largely through his consumption of media (see also: his "wild west fetish" via 6.18), which enforces gender roles and the relegating of the woman to the domestic sphere. this additionally aligns with dean's lived experiences: he had a domestic life while mary was alive, and when mary died the domesticity died with her. his only personal experiences with a settled home life are inexorably tied to the presence of femininity (his other excursion is when he lives with lisa, strengthening this association), and the absence of it and subsequent domination of john (the masculine) also took with it that domestic life.

and then you could even go so far as to make the argument that his eroticization of girlhood and his fetish for barely legal girls is a symbol of the domestic life he didn't get to live himself. it can represent a longing for youth in an environment that was inaccessible to him, a stability and domesticity walled off by womanhood. his youth was masculine, and his desire is for the feminine. it would stand to reason that when he yearns for an idealized youth, it would be through the lens of the symbolically feminine. and so this desire manifests through a fetishization of youth (girlhood) and his subsequent creep behavior. it all comes back to the life dean didn't get to live, eroticized and represented through a sexual fantasy born of rigidly enforced gender roles and the loss of femininity in his home life.

#supernatural #dean winchester #this is so long. i know no one is going to read it #but that's okay i'll survive #i've been thinking about this since before i saw a poll going around about 4.07 #and whether his 'hot cheerleader' thing was him being a creep or him being trans #and then i got to thinking about it again because i saw the poll. creep is much closer to my answer but this is my full response to it #i just think he is a mess of psychosexual fixations on everything he wants but can't have #and it manifests in the weirdest and creepiest behavior imaginable #so thanks for coming to my ted talk i guess #.txt #dean #the winchester gospel #spn posting

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echofromtheabyss · 3 months

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Medium talk is worse than small talk and probably what we're all most afraid of

We all know Small Talk:

hi, how are you, nice weather, how about them (insert sports team here).

Small talk follows algorithms and a kind of ritual pattern. It's the kind of appropriate conversation level for interacting with retail workers in public, and total strangers.

We also all know Big Talk. (I'm only calling it that as the logical inverse implied by Small Talk.) Which is basically where a high degree of familiarity is assumed. A common ND fuckup is conversing in conversational modes that, to many of the general population, are reserved for high familiarity. Either in terms of talking at length about a topic (which I feel is something that was actually more socially acceptable in the past, but has become broadly unacceptable over time; this was NOT really part of a diagnostic category in the 70s) or in terms of overfamiliarity/not being at the right level of social distance from the person for the thing you're talking about.

Most people rely on lots of context cues that inform how they will hear what the other person is saying, and those context cues may not be there for a near-stranger. All they're left with is the most uncharitable possible assumption about your intentions.

So with this in mind, this leaves me with the WORST conversation category, that nobody acknowledges, because we're stuck on Small Talk and Big Talk:

Medium Talk.

You actually need something in common with the other person or something you relate to, to really successfully do Medium Talk. Small talk can be done with total strangers you're never going to see again, and Big Talk can cut past a lot of stuff; I don't need every social belongingness or ideological thing or hobby in common with my family members, or other people in a high-trust relationship with me, to have a meaningful conversation with them.

Medium Talk is actually where a lot of the tripwires and landmines are.

People are making decisions to escalate or de-escalate here, and listening for loyalty indicators. You run the risk of keeping things superficial while missing an actual connectedness bid, or of being overly familiar - or getting too comfortable and offending/scaring the other person before they have any context for processing what you're saying to them.

Medium Talk is when you're moving from the Social Niceties, along the continuum toward Big Talk. You're dipping your toe in the water, moving toward the deep end.

Average to high social skills people will often throw out feelers about escalating the conversation. In the 90s, LGBT people would sometimes drop hints about some or other thing that only other LGBT people would know about, based upon some kind of context cue. There is ultimately some of this same dynamic going on with some forms of nerdy gatekeeping ("name one star war") albeit in a clumsy way.

But people do it all the time.

I think there is a tendency for some people to assume talk is 100% verbal while habitually ignoring the visual and relational context cues that are processed as communication. It's especially hard for people who *can't* process that information, but I think that there are lots of reasons some people end up just not learning to do it.

People often escalate small talk based upon presence of some kind of marker such as a nerdy enamel pin, or a sports jersey. This is what wearing tons of geek swag is actually all about. 70s-80s social skills guides and advice for single people, often advised having/carrying/wearing some kind of "conversation starter."

Once I learned about 70s/80s/90s gay hanky code, I realized that there was a lot of this going on in all kinds of ways and that people scan other people visually for various kinds of context cues for the escalation of small talk.

A big problem is getting too "real" too fast, and people in the Medium Talk Zone will commonly use celebrities, low-stakes fandom stuff, and the like as socially acceptable proxies for discussing their viewpoints while saving face. If you are still in a low trust space, then the problem with just blurting stuff out to another person is that they don't know you well enough to have any context for what you are saying.

Most people are processing a ton of context cues while you are speaking, besides the words you are saying. When still in a low trust zone, you are likely to be taken in bad faith. You saying the same thing that their friend said, is not being heard by their brains as actually the same thing.

Nor is your presentation of the project being heard by the boss as being the same presentation that is being given by the shinier co-worker who steals it from you.

Most people don't just process the information, they process *who is saying it* as a *necessary part* of that information.

And this is where Medium Talk is so dicey.

Small Talk? No problem. Most of us can do it on a good day and most of us do it without realizing how much we do it.

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unhelpfulfemme · 10 months

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Halt and Catch Fire is the best show ever and you should watch it if you haven't.

It has amazingly deep and three-dimensional and tender characterizations and a plot that's structured kind of like a spiral, in that you observe the characters over the course of ten years where they keep ending up in similar situations and you can see how much they have or haven't grown since the last time they had to face a similar thing.

It gives you a new appreciation for the wild west days of IT of the 1980s and 1990s, which is something I keep seeing people mention but have actually never experienced on my own unless you count searching for pictures of the W.i.t.c.h. on dial-up and playing some kind of pop the bubble game in 1999.

It has amazing female characters that aren't perfect but also don't have flaws that are sexist stereotypes. The two female leads are an angry punk girl and a hyperfeminine Southern girl and they are both presented as equally competent and given equal importance, even though the hyperfeminine girl gets underestimated a lot in-universe (she has a STEM degree and is as good with computers as the other one, but gets relegated into a "team mum" role a lot).

There is A LOT of focus on friendships and business partnerships and found family - it gives these relationships equal focus to the romances, and they are all realistic and grounded in the characterizations of the leads. In fact, the last episode focuses on the two girls' partnership, not their respective romantic lives. But the romances are amazing too, I have never been invested in a pair so hard the way I currently am in Joe and Cameron, if I weren't bi already they'd be my bisexual awakening. They seem like total opposites but have so, so, many parallels between them, and they have realistically sad backstories that aren't the stock "I was beaten by my mean dad" type. And they have amazing chemistry. And I love how the show is aware of the fact that they need to go outside of their relationship to grow and address their shortcomings because they kind of have the same flaws too, and even though they're still kind of pining after each other they only come back to each other when they're capable of having a stable relationship. This is especially good beacuse the girl is in her early 20s at the beginning and it was so so good to see the show let her grow into her own, on her own, rather than leaving her stuck in an endless back-and-forth with a messed up guy who's her boss and 10 years older than her, but then also respecting the connection they have.

All the characters are realistically flawed, and their flaws come back to bite them in their asses in the end, and the setups for this are strewn across several seasons. And it all makes sense for the character as a whole - for example, the punk girl is rebelling against pretty controlling parenting, but she obviously never learned how to handle relationships except in terms of the dominant person and the one who obeys, so she'd rather live in anarchy and never form any kind of power ladder in the first place. However, when she is forced to do so in order to handle the people who work for her punk IT startup she becomes very autocratic and controlling, and when people try to give her ideas she replies with, "Well, I'm the boss so we'll do what I say."

Why does she do that? Because she obviously doesn't know how to argue constructively. She knows how to a) aggressively overwhelm you, b) get up and leave (as she did to her family) and c) submit (unacceptable).

She does b) to her smarmy yuppie "it's complicated" man who is also one of the main leads - he does something to break her trust, she just abandons him and that's it. But then she gets into a fight with her next boyfriend, and she just assumes that that's it, and he says, "Woah, we're not breaking up, we're just arguing, have you never done that before in your life?"

At the same time, she forms a partnership with the girly girl and the girly girl starts just going around her whenever she hears the "I'm the boss so we'll do as I say" thing because she's frustrated that she has no say in things. This leads to several fallouts because spiral plot structure, and they're all mostly over one of two things: Cameron (punk girl) is being autocratic or Donna (girly girl) is being manipulative. Eventually they run the company into the ground because they can't listen to each other, and the plot always varies which one of them is right and never paints one of them as the 100% villain because they're both being kind of assholes but also deeply sympathetic.. But over the course of all this Cameron kind of learns how to be more functional in her partnerships, which then helps her with both her love interests AND her career. And then other things happen to address and highlight other flaws of hers, and this happens to all of the characters - three marriages fall apart in the course of this show, several companies with really good ideas are run into the ground and a guy commits crimes and then commits suicide because he bought into a Steve Jobs-type bulshitter's cool aid too much.

It has what I'd call great queer rep because one of the leads being a bisexual man is treated very casually and yet the rare instances where homophobia is touched on fit into the rest of his character and backstory so well (he insults a homophobic business partner at some point, and he also has an AIDS scare, and he recalls being bullied at school and how it affected him, and he makes friends with a queer teen because he notices she's like him and that's it). Like, there's an episode where his ex boyfriend comes into the picture and the plot doesn't revolve around them both being men - the plot revolves around his current girlfriend feeling insecure about the guy still having feelings for his ex and coming off as flaky and untrustworthy. The genders of the characters are incidental.

Like seriously this is the best show ever and I don't know why people don't talk about it more, current stuff like The Bear and Succession can only wish to be this nuanced.

#halt and catch fire

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topgunreacts · 8 months

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Principles of Aviation

An IceMav omegaverse tale

Chapter One Snippet

The call from destiny came on a Tuesday morning. Its arrival was not terribly early, but Maverick had been out bar hopping well into the witching hour, so seven AM might just as well have been half past midnight. Maverick rolled over carefully so as not to disturb the bed’s other occupant, and picked up the phone. He was midway through a groggy greeting when the voice on the other end of the line interrupted him.

“Mitchell,” a man barked. “We’ve found you a match. You’re to report to the Pheromonal Analysis and Pair Bonding Allocation Center in one hour. Bring your rut prescriptions.”

The voice was stern. Mildly annoyed. And quite familiar to Maverick’s ears. Captain Anderson didn’t make a habit of leaving his hoity-toity office to visit TOPGUN’s facilities across the station, but whenever he did, he always made time to hound his least favorite naval aviator regarding said aviator’s unacceptable marital status. Last year, in a moment of deceitful brilliance, Maverick had managed to get the brass off of his back—for good, he’d thought. It was a good story, with a leading lady worthy of the starring role. But the fact that Anderson had summoned Maverick to the fun police directly from home could only mean that the jig was up.

“Yes, sir,” Maverick said.

Click. The line went dead. Groaning, Maverick hung up the phone and rolled back over until he was on his back again, glaring up at the slowly rotating ceiling fan.

“It was nice while it lasted,” said a sleepy, feminine voice to Maverick’s left. The mattress dipped as Charlie turned to her side and propped up her upper body on one elbow. She’d been warning Maverick about this very phone call for months.

“I think we have to see other people,” Maverick said. “They know we’re not going to breed.”

Charlie gave him an affectionate smile. “Maverick, anyone with a functioning nose could tell we’ve never had sex with one another. Did you really think this would work?”

“I hoped it would.”

Charlie gestured towards the phone with her chin. “So, is PAPBAC having you meet another female today?”

“A male,” Maverick corrected.

“Really.” Charlie raised her eyebrows, thought for a moment, and then frowned. “Maverick, you didn’t—”

“Tell them I was gay to buy more time? Yes. Yes, I did.” Swinging his legs over the edge of the mattress, Maverick sat up. The five drinks lingering in his body in the form of nausea protested, but Maverick brushed them aside. “I really, actually thought to myself, ‘Hey, Mitchell, you know what would make the Navy stop pressuring you to do the mommy-daddy dance to produce more alpha male pilots? Telling them you’re gay.’ And I did not for one moment imagine that they would simply switch tracks from straight to otherwise and find me some prince charming in heat who needs my dick to calm him down so he can fly straight.”

“Well, of course they did. You’re famous now,” Charlie said. “Maybe if you’d done this before you finished TOPGUN, you’d have gotten away with it. They seemed eager to let your father’s line die out back then, anyway. But the Layton changed everything. It proved to the Navy that you’ve got pheromonal and genetic potential. They’re not going to let you fly under the radar anymore.”

Grumbling under his breath, Maverick wiggled out of his underwear, wadded them up, and threw the ratty ball towards the laundry basket in the corner. Miss. “Why not?”

“Because everyone’s eyes are on you,” Charlie said, slowly edging towards the warm spot Maverick’s body had left behind. “And they see an intelligent, talented young man whose recklessness needs to be tamed if he’s going to advance his career. They want to see you steady. Stable. If you aren’t going to breed, then maintaining a long-term relationship with a male omega is perfect for that. It forces you to settle down, and ensures he will, too.”

“But why push this so hard right now, all of a sudden?”

Charlie settled into Maverick’s side of the mattress and shrugged. “Maybe this was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Or maybe that male they matched you with needs immediate attention.”

“Of course he does,” Maverick muttered darkly. “Of course my life doesn’t matter as much as his.”

Swiping a hand over his face, Maverick stood and made his way naked to the bathroom. Charlie didn’t care. She’d seen it all before, and hadn’t been interested.

“Don’t take your medication,” Charlie called to him. Like Maverick, she wasn’t a morning person, and would remain in bed until the last minute. She even showered at night to sleep in as late as possible. “The first thing they’ll have you do is quit, cold turkey. You might as well get a head start.”

#top gun #icemav #writing #top gun fanfiction #iceman kazansky #maverick mitchell #principles of aviation #alternate intro post #less metadata more Substance

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lattefanficcafe · 2 years

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Twisted Wonderland Anya Like MC Faints Because Of Magicam Monsters

Spoilers for Halloween event!

Diasomnia members know about Anya Like MC’s power here!

You thought that your first Halloween in Twisted Wonderland would be fun.

It was your first time celebrating Halloween actually.

You had your very own dragon costume like Lilia and Malleus.

First day of Halloween week was so much fun for you.

But…

When magicam monsters showed up…

You weren’t sure anymore.

You sure attracted those magicam freaks with your cuteness.

They thought that a photo of you would bring lots of likes.

A huge crow was surrounding you wherever you go.

Those freaks made you feel uncomfortable.

As a telepath you weren’t on good terms with crowds.

Especially very crowded ones…

You tried to bear with it.

Your father Lilia and Malleus was busy with the Ramshackle attraction. So you were with your big brother Silver and Sebek, checking the situation in the other attractions.

“Those magicam monsters… Everyone is literally suffering because of them.”

“Hmph! Lowly humans..!”

“MC hates them too.”

“Don’t worry little lady! I will protect you from those lowly human beings!”

Then you suddenly heard a loud rumble behind you.

“Oh my god! Look at that girl!”

“Is she a NRC student too?!”

“She looks so young though. Is she a prodigy?!”

“I need to take a photo with her!”

“Hey! I saw her first! I will take a photo with her first!”

“That photo would get thousands of likes!”

Oh no…Magicam monsters.

Unfortunately before you could run away they already surrounded you with cellphones in their hands.

“Big brother! Sebek! Save me!”

Sebek and Silver tried their best to take you away from the crowd but they failed.

“You lowly humans! Leave little lady alone!”

Sebek was about to take out his magipen when Silver stopped him.

“We are not allowed to hurt them Sebek.”

“But little lady..!”

“We have to find another way. And your magic can harm MC in this crowd. So it’s not a safe option.”

You started to feel dizzy from all of the peoples thoughts.

It was so noisy and disturbing for you.

Your nose started to bleed and you felt sick.

When Silver and Sebek managed to get you out of the crowd you were about to faint.

“MC! You are bleeding!”

“Big brother…. MC doesn’t feel so good.”

Silver used a napkin to cover your nose and carried you.

“Sebek we need to get her to infirmary.”

“Yes! Quickly!”

You fainted in Silver’s arms when he was carrying you to infirmary.

When you opened your eyes you found yourself in one of the infirmary beds.

Your family was sitting beside you with a worried expression on their faces.

“MC! Thanks seven you are awake!”

“Chi chi…”

It was the first time you saw Lilia’s face like that. You could tell that he was worried sick for you.

“MC is okay now chi chi! It doesn’t hurt anywhere.”

“I am so glad that you are okay.”

“Little lady I apologize! I failed to protect you from those magicam monsters!”

“But big brother and you saved MC from them! MC would be in worse condition if you didn’t. Thank you big brother! Thank you Sebek!”

“Little lady… I won’t let you down in the future!”

“MC… we were really worried when you lost your consciousness. Did they do something to you?”

“Not at all big brother. But… their thoughts was so loud and noisy. MC couldn’t handle it.”

“I see. So your nose bleed as a side effect?”

“Yup.”

“So that’s what happened huh… Those magicam monsters… How bold of them to mess with my daughter.”(I will make them suffer. Peace won’t be an option.)

(Chi chi can be really scary…)”Um… Chi chi. Where is Tsunotarou?”

“He is in a meeting with the headmaster and all other dorm leaders. He is also worried about you a lot so he promised that he will come to visit you once the meeting is over.”

“Okay.”

“Would you like to go back to Diasomnia? Can you walk?”

“Yes. I want to go back to Diasomnia chi chi.”

“Very well. Let’s go everyone.”

Meanwhile in the meeting…:

“Principal Dire! Those Magicam monsters actually harmed a student! This is unacceptable!”

“Dorm Leader Rosehearts I know you are angry but-“

“Oh wow… Seriously? Are we just gonna ignore how those normies harass plus harms the students?”

“Wait… What did I miss? Who did they harm again?”

“MC fainted because of them Al-Asim-san.”

“Say what now?!”

“Uh… This meeting is pointless. We just need to punish them right? End of the discussion.”

“We certainly cannot do that Dorm Leader Kingscholar!”

“But they have no right to do that too. Maybe we should solve this with a contract.”

“No we can’t!”

“Principal Dire I understand that you are worried about the reputation of NRC. But are you really going to pretend that none of this happened.”

“Of course not! They made MC faint after all! And… Crewel would beat me to death if I ignore the fact that MC was harmed. He really adores her.”

“Dire Crowley… MC is my beloved friend. If you ignore the fact that she was harmed I think I could do something so much worse than that. And I think you would feel Lilia’s wrath as well and trust me it’s not a pretty sight. I hope I made myself clear.”

Silence filled the room. Surprisingly Idia was the one who broke this silence.

“Wow… Um… So technically if principal doesn’t do anything about it NRC might not exist anymore? Now that I think about it. Ortho always considered MC as his little sister so… we are lucky he hasn’t heard anything about this yet.”

“Maybe we should cancel the Halloween party…”

“No! MC looks forward to that party!”

“We shall make this party happen!”

And that is how dorm leaders came up with a genius plan of scaring Magicam monsters away.

You can be sure that Lilia and Malleus got your revenge.

And Lilia insisted you to stay in bed for a day.

You didn’t got bored in that day because you had lots of visitors such as Ortho.

“MC. I heard that you fainted! Are you okay?”

“I am okay big brother Ortho!”

“Your health data seems very good indeed! I am glad that you are okay! Don’t worry! My big brother and everyone else is scaring off those Magicam monsters! They won’t bother us again!”

You had lots of fun at the Halloween party.

Walking at the parade was your favorite part of it.

“Chi chi! MC loved Halloween!”

“Fufufu… I am glad that you enjoyed it!”

“Happy Halloween chi chi!”

“Happy Halloween my daughter.”

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xx-slug-xx · 4 months

Note

I’m really not sure who to send this to, because there’s no “one blog” to talk to about this. However, with you being a proship discourse blog, I figured it would be.. alright? The best choice? Not sure. I’m sorry if this isn’t the right place to say this, or you don’t want me to send you this.

(I’d appreciate it if this was posted so more people can see it)

I would make this my own separate post, but I’d rather not deal with people telling me horrible things in my inbox.

So.. I was an anti. Keyword was. I like to think of myself as a generally open-minded person, and I’m okay with most things that the internet deems weird or unacceptable. The ONLY REASON I was an anti is because of how antis twisted the meaning of the word “proship”.

I want no association with the group of people that actively send horrible, horrible things to people, all because they enjoy their fandom. Because I want no association with the people that think it’s okay to doxx and harass people over fandom.

I thought that proshippers were people that supported and were okay with “problematic” ships such as incest. I thought that proshippers were people that were okay with those ships being carried over to real life, or people that might be influenced by those types of ships to do those things in real life. I thought that proshippers were people that wouldn’t mind seeing similar content of real people.

While yes, some proshippers do like to consume content of “problematic” ships, I now realize that that isn’t the real term. It was just antis making the term “proship” associated with the word “pedophile” or “pro- (real) incest”.

Just one half-hour long scroll on the proship tag has made me change my opinion. Just THIRTY MINUTES.

I am now a proshipper myself, and don’t mind being called such. Would I consume content that I’m uncomfortable with? No. But do I respect those that do and leave them be? Yes. Do I support the ORIGINAL, UNCHANGED intentions behind the word proship? Absolutely.

If you are an anti yourself reading this- first of all, why are you in these tags in the first place?- second of all. The original meaning of “proship” is the golden rule. Taught in elementary school. Treat people how you want to be treated. And if you don’t like something, don’t interact with it. It is ultimately your fault if you are actively seeking out content that makes you uncomfortable.

Yeah I used to be an anti for the same exact reasons, Anon. You aren’t alone in your experience! :) I don’t like “problematic” fiction, and I stay away from that. But it’s not really my business if others DO like that type of thing, for ANY reason. Fiction doesn’t hurt people, groomers and other abusers are the ones who hurt people. Sure, someone can see things through a fictional medium that effects them negatively, but ultimately, it’s the choice to act on thoughts that makes the difference.

I keep this blog private from my other corners of the internet, for good reason. Antis can be dangerous and I don’t want to deal with that. And I don’t blame you for feeling the same way! You still should have a voice though, and feel like you are making some sort of difference :)))

#proship #profic #anti anti #profiction #comship #anti censorship #anti harassment #fandom discourse

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ceeroosa · 4 months

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i hate to be this guy

but i will, cuz i'm seeing it a lot a lot a lot lately:

i am begging people who have poor self-esteem and are extremely sensitive to external judgements (like, say, losing your absolute shit cuz someone made a mildly shitty comment in their public bookmark of your fic)

to work on that.

no, i'm not saying it was cool for them to say something mean about you in a public space where you could see it. i'm saying it's an extremely normal thing that you can't control, and you will be happier if you figure out how to focus on handling those things over trying to control other people

sure, make the PSA's reminding people that ficwriters have feelings too and demand that people stop making negative comments in public bookmarks because you're not wrong - it is a mean thing to do.

but it is also normal.

people talk about you. sometimes it's where you can see or hear it, and often it is "behind your back."

you cannot shame, demand, plead or tantrum your way out of the fact that people talk.

people talk about everything, and often in unfavourable terms. i have known people in my life who have torn themselves apart emotionally, have created such an obscene amount of stress in their lives, over the things people have or may be saying about them to other people.

"it's WRONG" they said

"let them be wrong" I said

because at some point you have to accept the way people can be. people can be cruel as much as they can be kind. they can be smart and thoughtful and insensitive and daft.

you, my little lovely darling, cannot control that and every attempt you make to try (and yes, I'm sorry, but the aforementioned PSA's absolutely count as an attempt to control)

the more stress and pain - disappointment, shame, righteousness, violation because i set a boundary why did they do the thing i asked them not to do why doesn't anyone ever respect me - you bring on yourself.

i don't want you to hurt yourself, i don't want you to suffer more than you have to. (unless you wanted to, i guess.) i don't want the things you enjoy and feel passion for to be tainted and ruined by other people.

i wasn't born thinking this way. i also went through stages (still do! often! recently!) of being frustrated that people can just go about life doing things wrong and being cruel and being stupid and i've experienced the way just thinking in that way increases my internal distress, it increases feelings of hopelessness and powerlessness, of feeling like things happen to me instead of being an active participant in life.

the following skills have helped me greatly in managing these feelings:

radical acceptance: practicing accepting the unacceptable, letting it happen without fighting or bargaining or resisting, relinquishing all illusions of control over this, that, or the other thing while recognizing that the only thing we do have control over in this life is how we respond - and carefully choosing how to respond after allowing the reaction to pass.

distress tolerance: radical acceptance can be under the umbrella of distress tolerance, but this is basically anything that helps ease the sensations of a distressing experience; things that are comforting and soothing, distraction, and, yes, even avoidance can be a useful tactic in the right situation.

self-assurance: this one's pretty tough. you don't have to love yourself necessarily, but you do have to respect yourself because there will be moments in your life where it feels like nobody respects you and if you can't even retreat into the sureness of your Self...well, it's gonna be hard. humans are social creatures and reliance on others is not weakness, it is nature. however, we've constructed a society that does not serve us and hyper-individualism leaves people alone. regardless of whether or not it is fair or OK, we have to accept that possibility - and figure out how to be our own champions so when those moments happen, we can survive it by saying:

"I know who I am. I know that I am (a good writer, a kind person, capable, sexy, whatever). I do not need anyone to validate my identity as (a good writer, sexy, kind, etc) because I know that my actions align with my values as (a good writer, a kind person, a capable person). Even if someone else's idea of what is (a good writer, a kind person, sexy) does not align with mine, and they invalidate my identity based on their values, I still know who I am because of my values and actions."

or something of that nature.

AND I AM NOT SAYING THAT YOU DO NOT NEED EXTERNAL VALIDATION OR THAT YOU SHOULDN'T SEEK IT OUT! OR THAT YOU CAN ONLY RELY ON OR TRUST YOURSELF or anything else annoying and lone-wolf-y like that.

you deserve engagement - comments, likes, reblogs, general squee-ing over your work, being told that you are lovely and sexy and powerful - we all do!

give and receive as much validation as you can. pay it forward. but in those inevitable moments of lowness, of radio silence, of questioning if you really are who you think you are:

it pays to have your own back, to be able to focus on the steadiness of your feet and who you are rather than what other people have done, are doing, or refuse to do.

#courtney thinks about things #i just think you all deserve to be happy #the only way to change the world is by doing the things you wish other people did for you

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night-wyld-system · 1 year

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Leaving Syscourse || Our Final Statement & Apologies.

This has been brewing for a long time, and we are at a point where we have to burn bridges for our own mental health and well being as well as own up to ways we have failed in the past.

20 weeks ago we made our first post with anything in regards to syscourse by reblogging a post saying we wanted nothing to do with it. I wish that had stayed the case and we had never pushed it further- even with the good to come out of it (getting help from some people to find a therapist, having ppl to talk to when first starting to understand our disorder- DID in our case.) I was also at a place where another group would have still in the end helped me out if we had not met them, this isn't to say all things were bad- but the way it has destroyed us mentally is something we regret doing to ourselves.

19 weeks ago we wrote our first real syscourse post. It was talking about the terms traumascum and sysmed and why we hated both. We now better understand why "sysmed" is used, though due to trauma with transmedicalism we cannot find it to be anything but upsetting when used by people because it feels like a downplaying of the ideas transmeds push. This is obviously not the intention but we cannot magically get over our triggers. We can however acknowledge why that term is used and understand that it is not coming from a place of people wishing to do trans systems like us harm. We still hold that traumascum is terrible, for obvious reasons. This was the start of something that led us to make several overly emotional posts on the topic over time, and we apologize for adding to the stress of others or for assuming the worst in people using "sysmed" to describe exclusionism on the basis of whether or not someone is a medicalized system.

16 weeks ago, on the 5th of January 2023, we made a post entitled "Our Experience In Endogenic Spaces" this post wasn't bad on the surface of it... however what was bad was the fact we had no business making it due to how many gaps we had in our memory at the time of writing it. We could do it much more justice now- and mention how the endogenic systems who helped us as much as they could were the larger group- and the group that was horrific to us for mentioning things that we did know were traumatic at the time was a smaller group. We plan to remake this post but with more accurate information, and we apologize especially if anyone was able to recognize who we were and we misremembered how much you helped us.

Eventually after being involved we started to interact with some accounts we now feel guilty for propping up. These were prominent anti-endo accounts who now more recently have either defended McLean Hospital's video on DID, or have pushed the idea that OSDD-1a cannot cause a system, or that trauma holders aka emotional parts- are not alters, or a variety of other takes that we find to be unacceptable or uncomfortable or something we cannot feel good with ourselves in endorsing. We know we cannot pretend that this was not also our own fault or that we didn't help them with previous arguments or takes- and we are sorry for not realizing what that mentality we were holding could cause sooner. We contributed to the issues that a lot of endogenic systems face, and we don't want that.

We are sorry for ever making statements such as "Harm done to endogenics is not ableism" when a lot of the time it does come from a place of ableism. Not always, but, we as we are now do not believe in a such thing as "misdirected x". The people who are horrific mean to hit the people they target with bigotry regardless if they're "technically" in the group they hate or not. It was wrong of us to EVER make such a statement.

We regret getting involved with the "plural kit isn't an accommodation" discourse because that was just a whole fucking mess. We use it all the time and it actively is helpful because we dissociate more without it. And we do now see that most of the time the reasons people have for refusing to allow it on servers is literally just them being ableist. Servers we have been in for ages have it and there has never once been a struggle for mods to know what was said by who using the bots. And these were in non-system focused servers.

Some of you may recognize this image

Though we do not fully regret it's creation, we do understand how much it is lacking in nuance and how it was not well made. We don't particularly like or dislike it now. We're just... kinda embarrassed by it. Because it's just not correct.

Another chart we made later on is one we feel does better, but still is not perfect...

If this were more accurate all the rings would overlap and also not overlap and also go off the page it's a whole mess and I do not have the energy currently to make a proper one.

We don't magically hate everyone we used to interact with- and even people who fall under the grouping of those we do not feel comfortable interacting with publicly or safe around due to our own current mental issues and differences in morality we do not hate. We just do not want to continue associating with such people.

All syscourse has done is made us split and ate up our time that we could be spending on art, learning the language of our people, researching the history we were never taught, and literally anything other than arguing with people and experiencing lateral aggression almost daily.

The only account we will engage in syscourse in is our RAMCOA vent account, and that would only be if somebody brings RAMCOA into syscourse again and we happen to see it and feel the need to crack down on people spreading false narratives about things people like us experience or have experienced- nothing else will be something we are willing to get involved with on tumblr.

We will not leave this account, we will use it to continue to talk about our own system and sometimes opinions on things but not have it be syscourse. We also plan to talk about Native issues and our Autism and we have to go back to work in a few weeks anyways so we may become more inactive.

#syscourse #leaving syscourse for good #I am not open to being convinced to change anything said on this at this time.#I am not dropping names because that's not reasonable- this also has more to do with OUR actions than anyone else's #pro endo #did splitting #alter splitting #apology #transmedicalism #sysmed #sysmed mention #transmed mention #anti-endo sentiments

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football-in-tuxedos · 1 year

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One thing I really hope people are starting to understand is, you cannot appease conservatives. You cannot appeal to their reason, to their hypocrisy or to the existing rights that they enjoy, or even are utilizing at the moment they attack us. I see so many people, willing to give up small rights or let specific minorities (usually trans people right now) suffer, on the assumption that it will appease conservatives. It won’t. They will just start their next assault.

The history of Roe v. Wade is, I think, instructive. Cause from the moment it came down, the left has been backing away from it, trying to placate, trying not to force the issue. Well they’ll let people pass bans at this many weeks. And then at this many weeks. And then under these circumstances. Surely each of these steps will appease them. And it never did.

And now Roe is gone. And the next time conservatives gain control over the government, they’re probably gonna try to pass a nationwide ban.

“But Ellie,” you say, “that would be opposed to their stated philosophy to leave it up to the states.” Yes. Which is why I say you can’t appeal to rights or hypocrisy, because a typically unstated, but increasingly stated, presumption of conservative politics is that there is an in-group and an out-group. The in-group, in the case of American conservatives, is white straight cis conservative Christian men. If you are a member of any other group, if you fail any of those tests, you may have rights on paper (and they are increasingly moving away from that) but you exercising those rights, you voting counter to them, you being represented in government is unacceptable.

We can already start to see this in the way that trans rights is being talked about in states. They have enough momentum to ban trans health care for minors...so they’re immediately moving on to banning it to age 21. And age 25. And from there I imagine they’ll move on to just banning it altogether. The reasons for this are ever shifting and frankly contradictory, because they’re ultimately unimportant. The point is to attack trans people, all other concerns are just the lie they’re telling to excuse them attacking trans people.

I have seen some “Allies” (and I use that term generously) arguing in favor of letting them ban trans health care under some ages, or even just abandoning trans rights altogether to try and focus on other things and to them I say; You cannot appease conservatives. Me going on hormones at age 30 is as unacceptable to them as me going on puberty blockers at age 11. Two girls holding hands is as unacceptable as them having sex in public. Us suggesting police be held accountable for their actions is as unacceptable as us stripping them of every ounce of funding they have. You cannot appease them. You can only stop them.

#politics #queer politics #queer #lgbt #roe v. wave

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now-we-say-c0ral · 8 months

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September 7, 2023

We're still not in talking terms. I had a good night's sleep for some reason. I didn't know if he was here or not. I checked the living room and there he was. Odd. It's 6:30am and he's still here. Probably off work. Oh, well. I don't really care.

Made it to work early. Saw Shaunie and she asked me how were things last night. Well, nothing happened. We're still pissed at each other, well, he's pissed and I'm angry. There's a clear difference.

I was supposed to scrub for the PSF. Ieron wanted me to double scrub. I sensed that he wanted to scrub but I wanted to. He's done the procedure so many times and I've not mastered it yet. I told him that I'll do it. I was preparing for the case. We were missing a set and we were not sending unless we have everything because it simply wouldn't be possible to go on without the towers. I descrubbed and had my break. When I came back, he scrubbed in to fix the sets because the missing instruments just came in and the patient was already in the anaesthetic room. I scrubbed but noticed that he was still preparing my stuff. He then told me, "Do you still wanna do the case?" I got a bit crossed. Fuck it. You know what? You do it. I can't even care anymore. I was crossed the whole day. He even asked me again if I wanted to double scrub over and over again. I just told him no and that he can do it. I don't know what he's playing at but I'm visibly and audibly upset about it.

Martha came in and she said, "Why aren't you smiling?" Funny how people can tell when I'm not fine. I just said, "Men are stupid." I told her all about my situation with Eddie and told me that it's hard to maintain a relationship and that sometimes she wished that she was single. That's the thing. Just now, JUST NOW, I think I realized that I'm at my best, rather, I'm better when I'm in a relationship. I don't want to be alone. I become brighter and better when I nurture somebody. I guess it's something to do with how I was brought up considering my parents separated and they didn't take care of me and I have to do it somehow to my partner, if that makes sense? Though my partner has been ungrateful about all the things I've done for him. Well, fuck that.

Went home around 6pm. Didn't bring gym clothes so I wanted to chill first before heading to the gym. Nico came down from the stairs and asked me, "Are you okay?" I said, "Why'd you ask?" and he said, "You're not okay." Apparently, Eddie was worried and asked him if he saw me because he didn't see me all day yesterday. Sweet? No. I got annoyed.

I texted Carl and asked if he wanted to hangout during the weekend but he was working. I told him that me and Eddie weren't talking and I shared about how I think men are dumb and gave some advice. Ross, on the other hand, interestingly replied to my IG story asking how I've been. Nagsumbong ang Edmark. Eto naghahanap ng kakampi. Apparently, he told Ross that he got upset because of the lunch issue and I told Ross that I was mad because of what he said to me. TRULY, men are dumb. Ed asked him to talk to me and ask me how I've been. He told Ross that he wasn't sleeping good and that he's thinking about me. It should have been sweet but I got annoyed. Apparently, he didn't know that I was mad about the thing he said and not the thing that he didn't do. It was a good vent out to Ross and Carl over the phone. A bit of the weight has been lifted from my heart.

He texted me around 9:50pm and asked for a truce. I simply didn't reply. Bukas ka na. Mangamba ka muna d'yan. Leaving the country without even texting me that you're going? Unacceptable. This cold war is just starting.

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 1 year

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Rage Fire Institution

Movement. 11.

“You have heard of resting, haven’t you? You’ve been in estrus again, and you’re still recovering. When’s the last time you’ve been home to see mother?”

Nursing the drink he’d had for the last half hour, Tatsumi had indeed heard of this mythical resting thing. And he had indeed been through estrus with the help of medical technology. The sleep pod took care of everything. From deification, feeding, pheromone release, breathing capabilities through to the mess of release. Everything was handled by the self contained unit once he’d shown up at the omega only clinic. The omega wanted nothing more than to go back to sleep until the end of the year, yet that was completely unacceptable. He’d woken up to dozens of messages from other students, even a couple from Doctor Poaw and Skylark, both filling him in on Maki as if that was the first question on his mind post-estrus.

Glaring slightly at Samara, it hadn’t been Tatsumi’s idea to go straight from the clinic to the cafe. He’d had other plans, only he’d gotten his timing wrong and bumped right into Samara when dealing with other business

“That’s where I was headed next”

“Nonsense, you would have gotten caught up then returned to the institution. When’s the last time you visited your poor mother?”

“I took a month off. She’s still the same”

“Ah, maybe I’ll take her some flowers. You really ought to be thinking about a prospective mate. Even if it’s only physical, it’d do you the world of good”

“I’m…”

“You’re busy with work. I can get you a deal on the optics you need, you don’t need to keep suffering this way”

Tatsumi sighed. Samara knew too much. Too much about him. Coming out of estrus and bumping into him had been a serious stroke of misfortune

“It’s fine. The pod works for me”

“It’s still not the same. Generic alpha pheromones, tricks to make your body think you’ve been knotted, pheromones to deal with a lack of conception…”

“My mental health is better than it was. I would have been fine had someone not stuck his nose in”

“Hardly. Any alpha would take one look at you and know you’d just come out of estrus”

“It’s fine. I appreciate your concern but it’s not needed��

Samara gave a light laugh. As someone who’d dealt with his estrus on his own terms, Tatsumi didn’t see the need to go changing things this late in the game

“Alright. Finish your drink, I’ll run you home after”

“I’m going back to the school”

“You need rest”

“And I can rest in my quarters there. Blame it on omegas needing familiar grounds or whatever you want, but I’m going back there”

“I expect you to stay there. If I hear any word that you’ve turned up at the club…”

“You won’t because I won’t. You ruined that. I only went to notify Donny”

“Yeah, yeah. I know what that means. You can’t keep living like this. I don’t want to see you this way. They wouldn’t…”

Anger flashed over Tatsumi’s face. For half a moment he had the desire to throw his drink on Samara’s face then storm out, but that would only prove Samara right. He had no right to bring any of that up, not now and not ever

“Don’t. I like where I am. I like the other students. It’s not what it was, but that doesn’t make my life bad. Everyone who comes back has to find a way to move forwards again. This is mine. Now, I’d appreciate the lift, but I’m not sticking around for a long winded lecture about how I choose to spend the rest of my days”

Samara raised his hands in defeat. Tatsumi could understand his friend too well. All the government campaigns were total bullshit and the moment you became a burden to them they ceased seeing you as anything remotely human. An unmated, unwed, unbonded omega with psychological scars could only expect their government payment and maybe a few medical perks in the first few years. His government payments went to the upkeep of his family home, leaving him limited option on that sense. He couldn’t say he was happy all of the time, but being around people forced him not to withdraw further, that alone should have been seen as a win. But not to Samara… Samara who had a long term partner and soon would have kids… something so out of reach of Tatsumi that it felt like an insult.

“Alright. You win this round. But don’t think I won’t keep trying to recruit you. I don’t want to see you left rotting when there’s something more out there. Take your time, I’ll get you some food, space knows that fridge of yours will be empty”

“I don’t need you too”

“Relax, if I don’t then how will be able to face my misses? She’s going to pick up your pheromones the moment I get home”

“That’s not my problem. You shouldn’t give her reasons to be upset”

“Just finish your damn drink already”

Taken back to the institution by capsule car, Tatsumi made a show of waving until Samara left. He’d bought him far too much food. With classes in session, Tatsumi’s plan was to head straight back to his quarters and crawl right into bed. He’d nearly succeeded too when a knock came on his door. There was only one bastard who’d come bothering him within the walls of the institution the day he came back, and that was Skylark.

Dragging himself back up, Tatsumi crossed to the door, counting to three before opening it. Skylark standing there as if ready to barking orders at him, the man seriously never knew how to relax. Casually, Tatsumi leant against the door frame, counting off the coming conversation points on his fingers

“I’m fine. I have food. I’m not going back to work until next week”

“You look like shit”

“And you look ready to blow up. Come in then, you can get it all off your chest. I’ll get us some food”

Food turned the omega’s sensitive stomach. Lighter food would have been easier to digest, yet Samara had bought mostly heavy pastry and noodles. Plating himself up some noodles, Tatsumi half hearted pulled out a few meat pastries, before bringing the two plates over to the sitting area. Taking the plate when offered, Skylark raised an eyebrow

“I didn’t think you’d get this fancy”

“Samara stuck his nose in. Is this about Maki, what’s he done this time?”

Skylark shook his head

“You don’t know the concept of rest, do you? Off having a date straight out of estrus…”

Skylark was as delusional as Samara, Tatsumi tiredly correcting him

“You know it’s not that way. I’m struggling to see what was so urgent you had to come the moment I got back”

“That kid, he been out lately?”

So it was about Maki. His username might be “MakingGood”, but right now he was “MakingAHeadache”. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Tatsumi sat across from Skylark

“I wouldn’t know. I was intercepted before I could see Donny. Did he sneak out again?”

“No. That’s the damn problem. The little bastard hasn’t done anything”

“That’s supposed to be a good thing”

“Not when it comes to him. He and that mate of his came to see me, pissing themselves as they did. You didn’t tell you’d cleared their project already”

“I wasn’t exactly thinking about the pair of them. Did you sign off?”

“I did. The little shit’s managed to pull off something half decent. I get you want to help them all, but you can’t be giving them projects like this”

Tatsumi sighed at implication

“I didn’t. You know I want to keep my head down. He thought that up with Poaw while I was sleeping. Though it does seem I gave him the idea”

“Now, you know…”

Tatsumi knew what was coming next. He was pilot who was stuck in research and Maki was a researcher stuck on the pilot track

“No. You knew the kid was smart, that’s why you wanted someone keeping him out of trouble”

“I didn’t think it’d actually work”

Maki wouldn’t be curbed so easily from seeking out what he wanted in his life. If the young alpha wasn’t going out, he’d have a good reason. Probably so Skylark wouldn’t deny him and Li access to the student mechs. Tatsumi expected more from Skylark as he spelled it out

“You should know some of the worst kids have a way of coming around in the end. Though I doubt he’ll give up his freedom any time soon. I’d place money that once this project is over, he’ll be going out again”

“The little bastard’s going to get himself hurt if he keep this up”

“You can’t stop a curious mind. Anything else happen I should know about?”

“No. Not particularly. He’s been going to classes and been seen over at the research wing. You had to go stick your nose in, didn’t you?”

“If all you’re going to do is complain about your plan working, then what’s the point?”

“Who else am I going to bitch too? Those little shits piss themselves when I come round”

Tatsumi knew Skylark was only bitching to prolong checking in on him. He knew Skylark well enough to know he felt superior to the students… even to him. Drawing his knees up, he made himself comfortable

“You can take that to go if you want. I’m not rushing anywhere”

“You should be. You know you can’t let your pheromones out on campus”

“They’re only a problem because you showed up. Don’t go sniffing me without permission”

“Then learn to take a shower before you come back. I’ll take this to go, like you said, but only because I don’t want your stink on me”

“Sure, sure. Next time, don’t come racing to me when the kid doesn’t mess up. It’s not my job to care about him”

“See that you don’t. That kid’s got a career a mile long in front of him if he doesn’t fuck it up now. I don’t want to be bailing him out in five years time down the road”

Leaving the conversation at that, Skylark left. Tatsumi poking at his noodles without any desire to actually eat them. If only Skylark would give a little. No. He’d never break face and tell Maki to pull his head in because he’d seen too many good people die. The man was a bundle of contradictions that made the omega’s aching head throb harder. Maybe it was better to forget eating and simply shower before someone else decided to darken his doorstep?

***

“Dude, did you hear, the prodigal Professor has returned. He walked right through the front gates like it was nothing. Man, I wish I had the balls to do that”

Humming, Maki didn’t look up from his data pad. Li sliding into his seat next to him, before pulling out his own data pad. Maki has hoped to finish what he was reading before his best friend arrived, but from the buzzing next to his ear, he’d run out of time. Li disliking the hum he’d gotten in reply

“Are you listening to me?”

“Not really”

“I’m telling you the Professor’s back and you don’t even care”

Maki didn’t have time to care. Annoyingly, his curious mind had locked onto the research student project and he’d been able to get it out of his head. He knew he’d let his friendship slide as he hadn’t told Li about the research group, but no one had ever called him a social butterfly

“Hurray? It’s not like we needed him”

“Aren’t you curious? Skylark said the end of the week, not 7 days with change and no explanation. He didn’t even tell us he was back”

“And? How do you know he’s actually back?”

“It’s on the school forum. What’s for you so interested you don’t have time for me?”

Before Li could lean over, Maki turned the data pad screen off, then placing it down and looking to Li

“I was reading. It’s not that important. The Professor totally bailed on us. He didn’t even bother explaining, why should we be the ones to make the effort of caring?”

Li rolled his eyes so hard that there should have been sound effects. Part of Maki was curious, yet the bigger part of him was angry that Tatsumi had first pushed his way onto the project, then left as if he didn’t have some form of responsibility as to whether the project passed. Li sassing him

“You should care because he’s our friend. You know what a friend is still, right?”

Ouch. Okay. Maki could see why he deserved that

“I said I was sorry. Cut me some slack, I’ve been working on our project”

“You said that, but you haven’t changed anything that I can see. How can you be working on it still?”

“So I can remember what’s in the presentation”

Li gave him a good hard look before burying his face in his hands

“You’re right. I’m no good at this stuff. What if we totally fail because of me?”

“And what if we don’t? If that prick turns up and slides by on our work, I’m not going to be happy”

“But if he doesn’t pass we won’t either. Can you message him? Ask him to meet with us?”

His best friend cared too much. He was faithful to a fault when it came to friendship and he seemed genuinely worried

“Li, you’re too kind hearted for this world. I’ll message him later”

“Thank you, I’m sure he’ll reply if it’s you”

“Don’t go saying weird things”

***

Skylark was a strange man, Maki decided that on the spot seeing his ban from piloting had been lifted suddenly. Taking pity on him, Fleur matched up with him for the hand to hand drills, their comms open with each other as they both pondered and speculated about why. Given his suit wasn’t against school rules, he’d swapped from his trainee pilot suit to the one produced by Doctor Poaw, the effects of which raised his synchronisation by 2%. In an actual battle a 2% raise was huge. Even to him the extra 2% felt huge. The cut of the fabric, and the feel of the fabric, felt far nicer too. There was no rubbing on his glands, and it had excellent sweat absorption.

Once the warm up was done, the entire training hall was converted. The floor moving to take the shape of a simulated battlefield so two teams of three could take part in mock battle, working to capture the flag in the middle. Student mechs lacked any actual firepower. The limiters on what they had were lifted by Andes in the control room. First years only had access to lasers and tiny smoke bombs. The lasers signified a hit provided a pilot could hold the target longer than 10 seconds. In the second year that became 5 and they also had small energy chargers that would spread across the point of combat like paint, then vanish with instruction from Andes. As shields didn’t fall into direct attack weaponry, they were one of the first things pilots learned about before even getting into a mech and allowed to be openly used. Still, they took a large amount of focus.

The days simulation was a jungle type environment. Technology making it so real around them that was it hard to think of the environment simply as generated pixels. Nature sounds accompanied, to the point where should a tree be bit, the sound of cracking and falling was authentic, as was taking fake damage if hit by the falling tree.

Thanks to his stupid reputation, Maki wanted to do what he usually did, recklessly charge the flag and get it all over with. Thanks to his new suit, Maki also wanted to make the most of it. He didn’t care if the other students saw it as an unfair advantage. They should have picked a similar concept for their own projects instead of modding mechs that meant unmodding them after. The research students had been working on a mod system for mech barriers, which also helped him in situations such as these. Without their own private mech and team of pilots, data had came from the piloting classes of past years. His mind a whirl of figures that he’d crammed into his brain, trying to assess the project from every possible angle to predict battle techniques.

With the same system for everyone, everyone knew what their mechs could do. Melee combat a given, yet Maki’s eyes had been opened. Even in melee combat, if he could shape his barrier, the barrier edge could be used effectively to subdue a mech while staying mostly protected.

“Sato, what are you doing? The match has already started”

“Leave him out of it. He always goes for the flag, everyone knows it”

“That doesn’t mean anything if he doesn’t move. Andes is going to be all over us if he stands there the whole time”

Flexing his mechs hand, Maki bit back a snappy retort. His team mates would have been the same if they had new suits. He and Li had tried hand to hand combat, but that wasn’t with the terrain in place. Maybe if he asked Skylark again, he’d let them try suit to suit combat with terrain activated… then again, the sky just might fall down if he asked too many questions

“Give it a rest. I’m thinking”

“Forget it. He’s thinking. Great. Let’s go without him”

If his team mates were going to do as they pleased, he may as well as do as he pleased. Activating his barrier, Maki slowly drew it out between both hands, watching the edges rather than the shimmering middle. It brought up new ideas and a new need to ask Li a favour. Being inside the mech meant he couldn’t be outside checking how the suit did against the barrier or how thick it was. If the research students could get permission to observe it’d do a lot for their project. Not that he cared about them… they simply provided an interesting idea.

“Sato! Stop messing around and get moving! They’ve already advanced!”

Scowling at the overhead voice of Andes, Maki had to admit now was not the time to be intrigued. Now was the time to be his labelled self and charge the damn flag as they all expected. If he kept dawdling he’d be benched again, and how could he test his new theories if he was?

“Yes, sir”

Following his teammates route through the dense jungle, Maki was the last one there. The melee had already started, three against two, with all five mechs around the central flag. Despite the dislike his teammates had for him, he couldn’t simply leave them that way. If this was a street brawl he also wouldn’t have been able to leave two against three and keep a clean conscious.

Plowing straight into the battle, Maki activated his smoke bombs as he went, using his barrier to keep his vision of immediate area in front of him cleared. Cursing him, it didn’t stop the alpha as he manoeuvred behind his teammates, pulling the first one back from the blindly swinging opponent. It was a total rookie move. If the smoke was in the way, the only thing you could do was back out the space

“What the hell, Sato? What are you trying to pull?”

“Activate your barriers and use the space to clear your footing. When I’ve got their attention again, go for the flag, you’ll be fine”

“You arsehole, what are you trying to pull?”

“I’m trying to win. It’s not my fault you didn’t use your own smoke bombs to put distance between you”

If his teammates didn’t like him before, they certainly didn’t like him now. Both cursing as Maki jumped backwards to move around the smoke field. Activating his laser weapon, Maki charged the opponent mech ground from the side, with no other plan of forcing them into to the smoke and hoping they’d swing at each other in the confusion.

Unfortunately things didn’t go that smoothly. As soon as one mech cleared the smoke, the others followed. Annoyed at the cockiness of dropping smoke bombs, all three mechs teamed up against him… while his two teammates focused on the flag. If only he could weaponise his barrier. If he could have modded the barrier to form how he desired a lance would have been good, or even a whip. Instead, alarms started going off as the three mechs started firing at him. The best he could do was return fire.

But his best wasn’t good enough. Three mechs acting independently meant three opponents, all with different thoughts. As he barrelled into the closest mech, the alarms in his cockpit suddenly stopped, the word “Eliminated” popping up on the display. The defeat was bitter, yet it would be unseemly to fight after being disqualified, even if his mech had more to give.

Reluctantly, Maki was forced to sit back as he watched his team lose. He’d not gotten to fight, nor had he gotten to test his suit’s capabilities further. It stung.

#omegaverse #mpreg #mech #mecha #pilot x pilot #older uke younger seme #rfi #rage fire #rage fire institute

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chattingwiththelightkeeper · 2 years

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Hello again. It’s the anon who messaged you about red flags with regard to mentorship scamming. I should clarify, I listened to your podcast about lifestyle trainers. That’s not what I’m asking about. Specifically, I am asking about other subs who take on the role of mentor, and have their own agenda, therefore making things inconsistent, confusing and causing doubt in oneself. Sorry if I wasn’t clear in my original ask. Thanks!

Thank you for the question Anon and since people reading this will not be able to see your first message, I will put a short version here to make it easier for others to understand the your question:

Please accept my ask using this method, rather than on your podcast link. I’m anxious about enabling my mic. I’m enjoying your podcast so much. I’ve learned a bunch and have even figured out how to explain things about myself more concisely. My ask is related to your episode that focuses on red flags. I’ve been on and off Tumblr over the past 4 years. I leave when I get spooked and rejoin when I learn enough to navigate more responsibly. Most recently, I left because I found a group that I considered my friends. However, both the individual and the group organizer, in my opinion, had a selfish agenda and tried to lead and mentor, but were hypocritical, inconsistent and pretty closed-minded when it came to others. So my question is, would you, please, address red flags when it comes to choosing a qualified mentor? I know you’ve touched upon this, using your background as an example. But I wonder if other subs fall prey to bad mentorship when it doesn’t involve a Dom or partner, but rather when it involves someone who acts as a friend. This, too, has a negative effect on one’s confidence and makes moving forward with trust more challenging. Thank you for taking time to read this and for your podcast.

Bad or unproductive mentorship can happen both professionally and personally so it is important to find the right mix of people to be mentors.

So here are some of my thoughts on mentors within the lifestyle but I think these will also help with mentors in the vanilla world as well.

Mentors, I believe most people think of as a personal relationship with a more experienced person that is long-lasting but mentors can come in groups, for example, a group of d-types a person feels comfortable asking a question to. Additionally, mentors do not have to be a long-term 'commitment’. They can be very situational, offering advice and sharing wisdom on a specific situation rather than

When you are getting to know a mentor(s), it is important that the person seeking the mentoring be clear about what they are seeking along with your goals.

It is also important, I believe, to find mentors who will be comfortable with sharing different viewpoints and/or opinions that might be divergent from yours. This does not mean they should be condescending or “put your thoughts/ideas down”, that would be unacceptable but a mentor should challenge you to see things differently.

Do not expect someone to volunteer to take you under their wing, instead be assertive by reaching out, getting to know them, and ask for their mentorship.

Finally, the last bit of my advice on mentors, make sure to be grateful to those who mentor you. With the world always in a big hurry these days, it is very easy to overlook letting a mentor(s) know you appreciate them.

Okay, now on to the question, red flags.

The first one that comes to mind is to avoid Cool Hand Luke’s. In the movie Cool Hand Luke, there is the famous line “What we have here is a failure to communicate.” And this is a red flag. Communication styles may mismatch meaning the mentorship would not be good or a prospective mentor simply does not respect you by communicating/answering your inquires.

What’s in it for the mentor? I feel that a mentor should want nothing in return, other than to see a person grow. So in the lifestyle, if a “mentor” wants to lay hands on you or otherwise have you do things ‘for them’ then it is a red flag in my book.

As I mentioned above, mentors should encourage you even if you see things differently than they do. There are some wrong and/or dangerous things in the lifestyle, there is no true way to practice the lifestyle. So look out and endeavor to avoid a mentor or group that wants, expects, or discourages you from approaching things differently than they do. I think that a good mentor will at times play devil’s advocate challenging you to see other methods or ideas. So lack of diverse thoughts/opinions would a red flag.

If you are looking at a group for mentoring, be a fly on the wall for a bit before jumping in with both feet while watching for this next red flag. Look at how happy the collective is. I understand that some may feel this is overly simple but if you notice that the group is made up of unhappy individuals, the group will more than likely not be helpful (or happy). There is the old saying birds of a feather flock together and life has taught me that grumpy folks love the company of other fuddy-duddies. So unhappy people is a red flag.

If a mentor causes you to feel stressed, anxious or even depressed this is another warning sign. Yes, sometimes a discussion with a mentor can be a bit stressful as perhaps it causes a bit of stress to ask something a second time or say that you did not understand their answer. But these are little stress things if they cause stress other than perhaps worrying that you will feel ‘silly’ for asking the question. A mentor or group should never make you feel anxious, depressed, or truly stressed. If you feel any of these, it is another red flag.

Are they trustworthy? A mentor should foster the building of trust. I know I have said it before but a mentor should not belittle, be selfish, or have any hidden agendas as these do not create a safe space. If you do not sense a safe, and trusting environment this is a red flag.

Finally, just in case anyone is curious about my podcast that Anon mentioned, this link will take you to all the info.

I appreciate the question and I hope you did not mind my delayed reply. I hope my thoughts help and thank you again for asking.

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