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#dick is a gravity defying cat
icantseepurple · 2 months
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Late night thought.
You know how when you need to put a cat down you can kinda just gentle toss them. And that sometimes people who are use to holding cats then hold a dog and forget that you can't really do the same thing for them. So they end up just throwing a dog. I would like to imagine that was what it was like for Bruce to go from having Dick as a child to Jason.
Bruce main experience with children would be this little acrobat who would just jump/flip out of his arms and honestly enjoyed the extra momentum of the toss when being put down. So that's just how he is use to releasing kids when carrying them. But then he has Jason, and is holding him and they have a cute moment, but then by instinct he throws Jason, and Jason just thumps to the ground. And both of them are staring at each other with confusion.
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soulmate-game · 3 years
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part 2 (of that new bio!dad fic)
Dick whipped his head over to Bruce, who could feel the heavy gazes of all his children as if they were physical. If they had had heat vision like Clark, he would have already been reduced to a puddle of mush. Bruce shifted, the only sign of his discomfort, but he recognized that the middle of a gala was no place for this discussion. There were too many busybodies trying to listen in for the latest gossip. So he plastered on a smile that he couldn’t quite feel, and held a hand out to Marinette. He was careful to keep a good distance though, and left the choice for contant purely up to her.
The young woman looked down at his hand, then back to his face. Damian had been shocked silent by what she had to say, and perhaps even more by the all too telling way that Bruce hadn’t so much as implied that she was lying, and the look he was giving her was making her a little uncomfortable. Yes, she hadn’t planned on interacting with her father more than just the years-overdue confrontation she had just done, at least not while at the gala… but her plans always left room for improvisation. She could make this work.
With a soft sigh, Marinette extended her own hand— half the size of Bruce’s, he noted almost immediately with a rush of illogical fondness— and grasped his lightly. She couldn’t help but notice the way his impossibly blue eyes brightened, no different than her own when she was particularly happy, or the way his mouth twitched with a barely suppressed beam. Instead, he controlled himself enough so that the only smile he gave would look professional and entirely in character to the nosy socialites still spying on them, and led them out onto the dance floor.
What everyone else saw was the unfairly charming Bruce Wayne giving his young guest of honor a simple dance. Just a basic swirl around the floor that every other social elite had learned when they were five. Clearly he was taking it easy on the self-made girl, who probably didn’t have experience with such dances. Humoring the accomplished young woman with his approval for a moment before he would slink back to his family or patrol the crowds and make the necessary greetings and meaningless chatter.
What his family saw was Bruce taking time to slow his steps, not for Marinette to keep up but rather to prolong the event. What they saw was the grace in Marinette’s steps as she never once faltered, and that Bruce was careful to take his cues from her instead of the other way around. He only led the dance in technicality, Marinette had all the real control.
What they saw was a father’s first dance with his daughter.
“Eighteen,” Dick whispered, eyebrows drawn low. “She said she’s almost eighteen.”
“Well, that lines up doesn’t it?” Jason asked gruffly, his own gaze never leaving the dancing duo. “We were planning on doubling up your big thirtieth birthday party as your eighteenth adoption anniversary,” he reminded his brother, who just made a slightly distressed noise in the back of his throat. Whether it was at the reinforcement of his adoption coming only months after Marinette being put up for adoption, or the fact that he was turning thirty, nobody could really tell.
“Hurt,” Cassandra spoke up from behind them, looking incredibly concerned as she watched the dance. “Uncertain.”
Stephany rolled her eyes, fidgeting from her quickly building energy. Anger was making her restless. “Of course she’s hurt. Bruce replaced her, with a boy he knew virtually nothing about, not even that long after she was born. How do you think that made her feel, when she found out?” Stephany let out a little growl, grabbing a flute of champagne from a passing server and downing it in one gulp. She ignored Dick protesting that she wasn’t of age yet, which made her wrinkle her nose. “Only one more year, Dickhead. Get over it, I need the buzz.”
“Well,” Barbara sighed and maneuvered her wheelchair around the group so that everyone could see her. “Nothing we can do right now but be supportive and watch Bruce like a hawk so he doesn’t make this worse,” she stated easily, not looking even the least bit ruffled by the news despite the disturbed glitter in her eyes.
“... Guys,” Tim spoke up, not looking at any of them. “Who wants to volunteer for Damian duty?” At first glance, it might seem like Tim was thinking about his own first disastrous meeting with the younger boy. Once everyone paid attention though, they could see that the truth was that Damian had snuck away and Tim was pointedly looking at a slightly hidden-away staircase to the second floor.
“Shit,” Dick muttered, but before he could say another word Jason shoved him back and started towards the stairs.
“No, not this time Dicky. I’ll talk to the brat.”
Back on the dancefloor, Bruce and Marinette broke away without any fanfare at the end of the song. If Bruce tried to hold her eyes for a moment too long, nobody noticed besides his observant children, and two of Marinette’s protective friends.
Then, just to make sure that nobody caught on with the help of hindsight, Bruce said something vaguely polite and praising, which Marinette accepted with flawless, distant poise. And they went back to their own groups, Bruce quickly noting that two of his sons were missing. He raised an eyebrow, about to ask why when a presence behind him caught his attention. Unlike Marinette and Chloe, this newcomer was not at all trying to hide their approach or be sneaky about it, even though Bruce couldn’t hear any footsteps that were close enough to belong to the mysterious entity. Closing his mouth, Bruce turned around only to be greeted by yet another vaguely familiar face. Bright green eyes bore into his, unreadable.
“Mister Wayne,” the newcomer greeted, voice warm but stiff. If the Waynes hadn’t all had years of recognizing when a person was only pretending to be cordial, they never would have suspected that the boy was anything but pure-heartedly happy to be there. But they did have that experience, and thus they instantly honed in on the very well-hidden fact that he had a bone to pick with them. Or, more probably, with Bruce.
He cut an impressive figure, for all that he was lithe muscle instead of bulk. Hair that was lighter than Chloe’s, less like cloth-of-gold and more like sunlight glinting off of wheatfields. It somehow hung in gravity-defying tufts, yet perfectly arranged to evoke a calming aesthetic. Like the fluff of a long-haired cat, almost, and it looked just as fluffy and hypnotizing. It contrasted with his emerald eyes, impossibly vibrant in their gleam. And the suit he wore was decidedly top-notch, much like the other two they had met from his class. He was daring, in a dark silver suit that slightly shifted in the light, green accents that matched his eyes standing out strikingly against the collars and trim, and coiling in tantalizing swirls at the cuffs. The lining of the suit jacket was done in a dark green that could almost pass for black in the right lighting, adding a layer of both drama and mystery as it peeked out at the back of his collar, the insides of his sleeves if he moved just the right way, at the bottom hem of the jacket when he turned or bent just so. And with his notoriety in the modeling world? He always knew exactly how to move or place himself to get the reactions he wanted. And he was clearly showing off the craftsmanship of his suit just then as he faked adjusting his cufflinks and lifted his head just the right amount to both look challenging and let the dark green on the back of his collar flash in the light in such a way that Bruce and those nearest him wouldn’t be able to miss the brief reveal of color.
“Adrien Agreste,” Bruce greeted back, eyebrows pulling down in slight confusion. Normally the topic of clothing was far from his genuine interest, but in this particular case it was an intriguing, and possibly even concerning, observation. So he said next; “That suit is not of your father’s usual style of design.”
Adrien scoffed, straightening out his suit’s jacket and making the obsidian buttons glint. “Of course not. I’ve started my rebellious phase— or, well, I finally started being blatant enough about it that my father noticed anyway,” the way his lips curled was decidedly not very attractive, but painted a vivid picture of a son who despised the way he was treated. Adrien quickly wiped the distasteful expression away and replaced it with a camera-ready smile. “I’m wearing one of Marinette’s designs, much to his chagrin. She insisted on making this for me as soon as she heard that my father was planning on sending me in a white suit.”
Bruce quickly caught on, and sighed. How long would the gala go on for, again? He didn’t remember what time it was anymore. “Your friend Chloe already got a pretty clear warning in. I suppose you know as well?”
Adrien’s grin darkened with mischief, and he nodded all too happily. “Of course! Marinette told me almost as soon as she found out, a few years ago. You see, we had to put down a very solid rule about secrets between the two of us. She has a bad habit of trying to shoulder the entire world’s problems and not tell anyone about it, if you don’t pay close enough attention,” his voice was deceptively light but his eyes were hard, warning. “And let’s just say, I have a lot of experience with bad father figures. I can recognize them a mile away by now. The signs of neglect, of apathy,” his eyes suddenly lightened when he saw how Bruce’s throat visibly caught, how the man didn’t seem to realize he had stopped breathing. Maybe he was being a little to mean, Adrien thought. So he let the dark slip out of his eyes, and his smile turned more genuine. “You don’t have those signs. You looked at Marinette like you were both the happiest and most miserable man in the world at the same time. But you can’t change what you did to her, Mister Wayne. If you want some advice from Marinette’s oldest friend?” Adrien held out a closed fist.
Bruce took a second to realize what was happening, too busy trying to recover from his situational whiplash and wave of relief. Once he caught back up to the present, however, he held out his open palm and let Adrien drop something into his hand.
To his shock, it was a pen, engraved with the name he recognized as Marinette’s biological mother. He also recognized it as a popular model of pen-knife. He raised his eyes to Adrien, who winked.
“Marinette doesn’t know I had this made. And she has a lot of tricks that might surprise you, but what she wants more than anything is stability. If you try to give her that, show that you care and you want her safe— and then prove that you’re gonna stay— then maybe you can repair the damage you’ve done. It won’t be easy though, Mari is the single most stubborn person I’ve ever met. And I grew up with Chloe.”
Bruce closed his hand around the pen, swallowing a lump in his throat. He couldn’t quite figure out why, but Adrien’s faith in him and his help… somehow felt significant. He nodded to the young model.
“Not to worry, I have experience with stubborn,” he glanced back at his other kids with a small smirk. None of them were the least bit repentant. “And I do want to stay. Thank you for the advice.”
Adrien shrugged. “Don’t thank me. If you hurt her again, you’ll never see my revenge coming. It can be rather… catastrophic,” with that ominous threat, Adrien bowed dramatically and turned to leave and do some rounds charming the elites. Bruce tucked the pen in one of his hidden pockets, but stayed silent after that. He had a lot to mull over.
—*—*—*—*—*
Damian leaned on the railing of the balcony, looking out over the gardens behind the gala’s venue. He was glaring at nothing, and his hands trembled from where they gripped the rail. It was five minutes, a little longer than he had expected but not that odd considering everyone’s distraction over Marinette, before he heard the glass doors behind him creak open.
“Yo,” Jason greeted, knowing it was better not to catch the boy off guard. None of them were good with surprises anymore, for good reason. It was always best to announce their presence before they made someone react violently on accident. Damian’s shoulders relaxed a little— not a lot, but enough for Jason to notice. The older man sighed, walking up and leaning on the rail next to his little brother. “What’s on your mind, kid?”
“That could have been me,” he almost instantly blurted. It was still hard talking about his feelings, but certain things were easier with Todd. This was, apparently, one of them. “If Mother hadn’t kept me a secret.”
“I don’t think so,” Jason disagreed, shrugging. “There are several big differences here. For one, Marinette was born three years before you were. By the time you were born, he already had Dick and he would have only been a year, max, away from taking me in. Which means he already had built up his problem with taking in kids, and nothing would have gotten him to give up a chance at raising you. With or without Batman getting in the way.”
“But then why—” Damian growled. “Why did he give her up?”
“Because he’s an idiot,” Jason remarked bluntly. “You know how he is. He didn’t have a kid at the time. Hell, Bruce would have only been twenty-two back then. He only adopted Dick on impulse because Dick reminded him of himself, but before all of that shit? He probably made a million excuses about not being able to raise a baby and be Batman at the same time. About his life being too dangerous for a kid. Which, yes it is, but that clearly didn’t stop him later.”
“She’s older,” Damian muttered, this time softer.
“Yup.”
“Her mother wasn’t an assassin, probably. She designs. I hate to admit it, and you are never to repeat it to anybody, but her work that we’ve seen so far is impressive. She can clearly charm even the most stuck-up of gotham’s upper crust.”
“Yeah,” Jason agreed neutrally, his eyes never leaving Damian.
“Father won’t need me. He already doesn’t have much patience—” Damian was cut off by a flick to the nose. “Hey!”
“Not my fault you’re being stupid,” Jason defended himself. “Look, B’s actually been real patient with you these past few years. I mean, when was the last time he yelled at you? Or told you that stupid ‘justice not vengeance’ line?”
Damian opened his mouth, then closed it. After another moment, he replied; “Almost two years.”
Jason nodded. “It might take him way too long, but he can still learn new tricks. Especially after that mess with Heretic, he’s been trying really hard to be better to you. He still screws up, because I think we all know by now that he’s a bigger mess than any of the rest of us and that’s an accomplishment, but he’s trying. He doesn’t keep you around because he needs you. He’s got plenty of us around if all he wanted was soldiers— though none of us would stick around if we thought that’s all he wanted.”
Damian flexed his jaw. He was still the most violent of the kids, besides Jason. He saw Bruce rubbing his forehead or pinching his nose far too often at some of his decisions or comments. He was stubborn, impatient, reckless.
But hadn’t Bruce himself told him on several occasions that he wasn’t trying to make him a perfect soldier? Hadn’t Bruce himself said that he just wanted Damian to grow into himself?
It was just really hard to swat away those stupid voices in Damian’s head. Voices of the past, mostly, old dialogue he had never actually forgotten. That he merely pretended had never affected him. The “you’re too violent”s, the “that’s not how we behave, Damian”s. All the old lectures, the old fights. They echoed like stupid little gremlins of doubt.
“...Marinette has his eyes.”
“Don’t beat yourself up over something like that,” Jason’s voice was soft, but gruff at the same time as he cuffed Damian over the head. “You didn’t choose to be born, idiot. And despite being a little demon, none of us would reverse it, You’ve saved all our skins at least once. And besides,” he nudged Damian a little with a grin. “You’re not half bad, nowadays.”
Damian chuckled. “That makes one of us.”
“Hey!”
@peterxwade24 @mizzy-pop @maskedpainter @ladybug-182 @khneltea @itsmeevie01 @fusser90 @woe-is-me0 @lolieg @moonlightstar64 @jayjayspixiepop
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moonlightchildz · 3 years
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wild; j.h
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summary: jung hoseok had the tendency in driving you wild while fucking you senseless.
tags: M, established relationship, smut, creampie, fingering, domestic!hoseok, somewhat of spit play, slight degradation, drug usage (weed)
“So you do this,” Hoseok began showing you how to roll, his eyebrows furrowing in deep concentration. He was too busy trying to demonstrate to you how to properly do it as you watched him in fascination. He was just too cute to not pay attention to. From the way he slowly bit down on his lower heart shaped lip to the way his pretty hands looked underneath the dim lighting in his back porch.
In his thighs he had a basic raw tray, and you were peering up at him in admiration even though what he was doing wasn’t exactly the most legal thing he should be doing at the moment. His wavy hair was swept on the sides, heart shaped lips looking kissable right there and then. He was humming, concentration passing beyond 100 percent and right then your heart sighed. Followed by it fluttering once you saw the tip of his tongue begin to lick the tobacco leaf. His short, manicured nails were turning the half made blunt in his hands, tongue shutting it sealed. 
He was always detailed, precise, and quick when it came to rolling his shit. One of the things that fascinated you of him was how he was constantly putting his all in literally everything. His work, his dancing, his rolling, his goals, ambitions, and everything that made him into the person that was Jung Hoseok was magnified even more by his sheer beauty. So as your boyfriend occupied himself in finishing it, you let your thoughts wonder straight down to the gutter. Hoseok was always fucking phenomenal with his hands and mouth. That was something he was definitely cocky of and with every damn right he should be. The first night you two were intimate he had fingered fucked you into oblivion and ate you out until you felt like you were defying gravity.
“And that’s how you perfectly roll a blunt,” he cockily finished, holding the ending product out towards you. You tried to compose yourself, tried to make it look as if you were paying attention from the beginning, but it was too late. He had caught you.
He sighed once he glanced up through his long, thick lashes. “You weren’t even paying attention, y/n.”
You impishly smiled, eyes crinkling as you leaned forward. “I’m sorry,” you began, though not feeling sorry at all. “You’re just really...wow.” you lamely tried to express just why your attention span was shit.
He looked annoyed now and you simply giggled to yourself since your boyfriend always tended to take instructing so damn seriously. But hey, he was a pretty damn great instructor. A really, pretty and beautiful one. A hot one too.
He however was not the least amused. Judging by the way he was gazing at you with a pouty mouth, you knew you were bound to get an earful. “Just because we’re dating doesn’t give you the excuse to slac—” he began, and even when he was reprimanding you, you still viewed him as your beautiful, breathless, and irresistible lover.
“You’re not even paying attention right now!”
Sheepishly, you just leaned into him with apologetic hands already framing his squishy cheeks. His words slowed down and lowered to a mutter once upon seeing you so close to him, as if catching him off guard. And just like a charm, your spell had already rendered him speechless as usual. With a tiny, but cocky smirk you teasingly brushed your lips against his, fingertips slowly caressing his skin, admiring him up close.
A hot whisper left your lips, “I’m sorry baby, I really didn’t mean to.”
Hoseok just grinned against your mouth before he slowly leaned in, eyes set on you until they fluttered to a close as he softly kissed you. Your hands slowly abandoned his face, lips molding against each other’s. You let yourself clung onto your boyfriend, arms winding around his neck as his hands began to encircle you. His hands were already working their way underneath your dress, fingertips ghosting your sensitive thighs all while he slowly began to unravel you with just the magic of his lips. 
 He quickly eased into you once your hands began to tug at the hair strands at the nape of his neck. His body was turning towards you, mischievous fingers squeezing and bruising your bare thighs. It didn't take long before you were already crawling on top of his thighs, blunt forgotten now. You caressed his face, admiring his beauty before you turned and leaned backwards into his arms.
“Am I forgiven now?” you softly teased, a smile edging your lips. “I promise I’ll pay attention next time.”
“You were staring at literally anything but at the blunt,” he said, amused now. His hands were on your thighs once again, gently squeezing part of one. However your eyes were mainly fixated on his swollen pink lips. “It’s cute actually, even though you have the attention span of a squirrel though.”
“I’m sorry,” you brushed your lips against his, momentarily catching his bottom lip with your teeth. “It’s just, I have a really, and I mean, really, hot boyfriend you see, and uh I can’t help myself when he’s looking at me like that.”
His light brown hair covered his eyes so you ran your fingers through his wavy strands, wanting to see your man in all perfection in this dim lighting. There was a soft breeze, reminding you of the ocean that was just a couple feet away from the both of you. The both of you were in the comfort of his home, alone, enjoying the water nearby, and being wrapped up in each other for as long you both needed. Tonight was just barely the beginning for the two of you.
 He was already shaking his head, shyly uttering out, “Yaaa, stop it.”
You noticed how his cheeks were flushed, bashful smile luring your heart into his mercy.
“I am so serious right now, baby,” you purred out, lips tracing the underside of his jaw until you could feel his breathing fan your skin. You could feel his breathing pick up, fingers tightening around whatever part of your body he could grasp at the moment.
You felt him begin to grin, and as you glanced up, your wandering hands had managed to loosely wrap around his neck.
He quirked up an eyebrow, “Oh, really?”
“Mhm,” you nodded eagerly.
His hands were already framing your face, kissing you deeply before you could respond. His tongue was making love to you as your hips slowly began to move against his. Your fingers slowly made their way up his shirt, roughly fisting it. God, right now all you wanted was to run your fingers down his skin, kiss every part of his body, and leave love bites to adorn his melanin skin. Every fiber of your body wanted nothing but to feel your lover against your warm body. You wanted nothing more than having his plushed lips suck your sensitive skin into his mouth.
Hoseok’s fingers tangled in your hair, pressing your mouths together as you panted out against his lips. You felt your hips move on their own, rocking your whole body against Hoseok’s hardening cock. You could feel your underwear dampen as the tip of his cock brushed against your center each time you moved your hips. Soft, keening moans emitted from your lips and it was driving him wild. Your whole existence drove him to utter madness. He just couldn’t get enough of you. Your hands were already bunging up his shirt, urging him to take that damn thing off already. As Hoseok pulled it over his head with one hand, your hands nimbly unbuttoned his shorts.
He was already hard, and the anticipation to feel him inside of you was already brimming out of you. He wasted no time in letting his fingers find your covered clit, his thumb gently brushing it in guided circles. His fingers stroked your sex, rolling it between his fingers in such a teasing motion. He was a teasing little fucker and his batshit smile was a dead giveaway.
“I don’t need it,” you whined out, hands stopping his fingers. As much as you loved his hands, you wanted his dick inside of you at the moment.
“You’re not wet enough,” he contradicted, trying to shush you. This time he slid your lacy underwear to the side and with his thumb on your clit and finger, he slowly continued playing with your pussy. He watched as you impatiently ran your hands to your breast. Thumbs stroking on your nipples as he coated his fingers with your juices. He began stroking you and you were a hot mess, lolling your head to the side, and slowly beginning to rut yourself against his magic, slender fingers. 
“Seokie, please,” you whined out, trying to feel him even more as urgently and desperately as possible. He simply curled his digits inside of you, dark eyes watching his princess beginning to lose control of herself once again. Fingers were digging into his shoulder blades, soft moans emitting from your reddened lips.
“H-Hoseok,” you cried out, strands of your damp hair attaching to your face. Your eyes were clamped shut, mouth pressed directly against his cheek. Hoseok simply gave you a peck on the lips, grinning like the Cheshire cat. He knew if he licked the pussy, you both would simply forget about the finished blunt and take care of business for the rest of the pending night.
“Please,” you kissed the side of his mouth, stopping his movements with your hand. You continued to leave wet opened mouth kisses all over his jaw, your breath ghosting the nape of his neck. His darkened gaze studied you, slowly sucking his fingers into his mouth with such delight. 
Once he was done, his hands cupped your cheeks, puffing your lips out to him. “You’re the most impatient brat,” he mused out, his smile just making your chest swell with pride and happiness. Yeah you were a brat, but you were his brat to deal with. Heart, soul, and body belonged to him wholeheartedly and completely.
He swiftly moved your panties a side, slowly sliding down a finger. “mhm,” he began, getting cocky since his girl was already dripping wet and mewling to get fucked. “I guess you were right, baby.”
His hands were firmly placed on your hips, guiding you over his thick, and veiny cock. His hooded gaze fervently landed on your face, watching as he teasingly rubbed your pussy against the tip of his cock. With each movement, you coated his dick with slick and he softly groaned at the delicacy, the blood rushing straight down to his dick. Your mouth was slightly ajar at the sensation that you couldn’t help but spread your thighs wider, having yourself rut against his cock with such teasing and slow movements. 
“Oh my god,” you murmured out against the crook of his skin, your tongue tracing his hot skin as your fingers dug into his back. You felt his cock twitch underneath you, and you knew he loved it when you were being such a dirty whore just for him. So you tugged at his earlobe, whispering, “I can’t wait to have my pussy stuffed with your cum.” 
You felt how slick your pussy was incredibly getting from swiveling your hips against his hardened, thick, and veiny cock. He was teasing as he nudged the tip of his cock inside your folds, and then slid it back out. He was practically biting back his groans, enjoying just how much you were already mewling. 
“Please,” you whimpered out, lips trying to find his swollen mouth in need. Your dilated pupils met his, cheeks were flushed already, and your fingers were beginning to wander all over his toned abdomen. Your heavy breathing fanned his mouth, foreheads were pressed against each other’s, and your eyes were trained on his. Bodies were overwhelmed to the point where Hoseok found himself pushing inside of you. Your breath hitched as you felt him, slowly fill you up.
“Oh fuck,” you softly moaned out at the feeling of his cock pulsing inside of you. Your slick covered thighs rubbed against his, driving Hoseok absolutely insane. All he wanted in that moment was to lick your mess away with his tongue and shove his fingers inside your wet cunt until you were a sobbing mess just for him. You felt him smirk against your skin as his hands grabbed your ass, and thrusted into you. 
“You take my cock so well, princess,” he grunted out as you slammed down against hips, meeting his thrust halfway. 
“Only for you,” you incoherently whimpered out, moaning afterwards as you rolled over him. His hands engulfed your back, helping you bounce right back up and slamming you down against him. Pants began to leave his lips, your soft whimpers and pleads of ‘more, more’ edging him on.
“Such a pretty princess,” he agreed, dark gaze taking in the way you rocked your hips so sensually. Your hands were matted into your head, his cock making you stupid dizzy.
“I-ah-I,” you incoherently cried out, eyes screwed shut, and nails digging into his shoulder blades. You felt your body arch, arms instantly wrapping around his neck as you felt sweat coat your skin and his. The sound of skin slapping and your wet pussy sliding out and slamming back down was all that echoed in the back of his porch. Hoseok was keen on watching the way his cock slid out of your pussy, edging mewls out of those sinning lips.
His hand grabbed a hold of your neck, halting your movements. His hand was large enough to cup the side of your face and right underneath the base of your throat. He teasingly nudged his thumb inside your mouth, knowing damn well how much you loved his hands. He was grinning down at you, amused at how fucked out you seemed to be and he wasn’t even done with you yet. As you glanced up at him, your hands caressed his flushed face, mouth finding his in seconds. His lips sucked your bottom lip into his mouth, saliva dripping down your chin as he nipped and licked away until you were begging against his mouth in such moans. 
“You want on your knees, or back?” he nudged your nose with his, his voice a bit huskier and slurred. There wasn’t a second thought as you responded, “Blow my back out.”
His hand was grabbing a hold of the back your neck as he lowered you down on your back, legs hanging from the edge of his settee. He didn’t even need to spread your legs apart from him since you were his whore and you loved doing that already. 
“Fuck,” he groaned out in disbelief. The sight of you looking completely disheveled and ready for more had him rendered speechless. 
He pinned your wrists above your head, tongue running up the side of your neck. His plumped lips peppered kisses down your collarbone, tongue sliding and tracing them to his liking. He was absolutely infatuated with you and his love language was marking his significant other. 
he released your arms, spitting out, “stay still, whore.”
you kept your arms crossed, chest heaving as hoseok grabbed a hold of his aching cock. he ran the tip of it against your glistening pussy, moaning at the soft whimpers emitting from your lips. your thighs were quivering and you were so fucking messy, mouth slightly ajar as he watched your hole clench around nothing but air. he slowly pushed himself inside of you, grunting at how you were swallowing him completely, mewling so fucking loud. it’s all he wanted to hear from you now and on.
“mhm, fuuck,” you choked out, your fingers desperately grabbing a hold of his arms to tug him upwards. you needed his lips on your neck, your collarbones, and him whispering the dirty things he would do to mess you up even more.
“baby likes it, huh? my cock?” he rasped out, lips ghosting the underside of your chin. he was grinning from ear to ear, watching as you arched your back for him, spilling nothing but your dirty sins out into the void.
“mhm, mhm,” you cried out, eyes fluttering to a close as he slid out and pushed himself all the way back in to the hilt. you swore you could feel the pulse of his cock drag against your walls, and you relished at how hoseok nipped at your soft skin. he bit down on your collarbones, then ran his tongue over, splattering his spit all over your chest just how you loved it.
he bottomed down, fingers digging into your thighs.
“oh my fucking god,” you moaned out loudly, head thrown back in absolute bliss. He was thrusting into you, his hips snapping with such fervor that had your head bouncing against the settee. at some point your fingers were holding on to the back of the settee, hands barely managing to grip on to it.
“More, more, please--” you kept repeating over and over again as your legs to quivered. With each thrust, you could feel the pulse of his cock hit every inch and corner of your sweet cunt.   
Perspiration coated his body and yours and the summer breeze made it even more exhilarating. The both of you too wrapped up in each other’s arms, lost in sense as he kissed your worries away and welcomed your most sinful desires. 
He shifted suddenly, gathering your right leg and pushing it to the side. His forehead was pressed against yours, mouths missing each other’s in desperate attempts to reach your high. You felt it bubbling up on your lower region, toes curling and on your slick covered thighs.
“So close,” you cried out, body shaking in his arms. Your nails were dragging down his back, edging him on. Hoseok kisses you, swallowing your moans into his mouth as he gave one last thrust, sending you into a state of euphoria.
You felt his cum begin to drip down your thighs, and as you tried to close your legs, Hoseok simply spread them wider for him. He would never get tired of seeing his cum leak down your thighs.
“Brat.” He pulled back, leaving you panting. you could barely breathe, much less try to at least sit up. so he delicately wrapped an arm around your body, helping you sit up right on his lap. he was quick in grabbing the soft towel, the pad of his fingertips ghosting your sensitive skin. you watched how his fingers nimbly cleaned you, imagining how they would feel being sucked into your mouth.
even as he spread your legs open to clean you up, he definitely noted the way your skin arose with goosebumps. it made him smile.
“I love you,” you smiled in return, your hands cupping his face, turning him so he could glance down at you.
“Yeah, yeah,” he huffed out and even while you were motionless, you still managed to punch him on the arm. He chuckled, and purposely kept on ignoring you until he was done cleaning you up completely.
“Hoseok,” you pouted and he leaned back into your clingy arms, kissing you dizzy again. His fingers were tender as they caressed your cheek, smile endless and eyes closed.
“I love you more, silly.”
content with that, you judged your nose against his before he said, “So, how about that blunt?”
You were already lighting it as you slightly leaned away from him. “Can you pass me your shirt? I’m cold.”
Hoseok threw you his shirt, shaking his head as he watched you deeply inhale. Sure, you didn’t pay attention to the rolling, but you sure as hell didn’t need teaching in smoking all of his shit. He watched as you paused momentarily to slide on his shirt and crawl over to him once again. your throne was his lap - specially his thick thighs - and he knew that already. his thighs and mouth were all yours.
You sat with your legs entangled with his, eyes half lidded, and a pouty mouth. “What?” He chuckled, his index finger bopping your nose rather cutely.
“Miss you,” you nuzzled your nose against the crook of his neck.
He let you into his arms before embracing you and pulling you tight against his chest. “I’m right here baby.” He muttered out as you passed him the blunt.
You sighed in contentment, smoke wafting the both of you as you nuzzled yourself on to him. you pressed your lips on the base of his throat, mumbling out, “I love you.”
Smoke emitted from his lips as he slowly crooned out, “You drive me absolutely wild, you know?”
“I love you.” you smiled widely at him. You would never get tired of saying those three words to him. Expressing your love to him was one of your most endearing features and he absolutely loved you for it. vocalizing your love for him was his own reward after making you cum countless of times.
He slowly kissed you, humming against your lips as you cheesed from these simple words. “Impossible, princess. I love you more.”
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jason-bitchass-todd · 3 years
Text
Batboys and Their Singing Voices
(feat. alfred)
honestly?? idk man i just finished three essays and cannot get this from my head
dick cannot sing but that does not stop him
his voice is shrill and high
can he belt most broadway musicals by heart? yeah
will hearing a butchered dead girl walking from heathers one more time make jason finally kill him? also yeah
he’s not tone deaf but he’s so close that it hurts
jason swears up and down that after dick tried to hit the high notes in defying gravity his ears actually bled
on that note (pun intended) jason’s voice is low and raspy
like the kind of voice you imagine humming to you when you’re about to fall asleep
jason doesn’t sing in public unless drunk, and even then it’s nothing compared to the loudness of the music he’s following
he can by no means hit more than like two notes a line
but just the deep rasp from his throat makes up for it
duke can sing and he does so beautifully
he’s got the kind of voice to serenade people from a balcony with a boom box in arms
he can carry a tune fairly well with no training
his voice is mid range
he can’t hit the high notes dick screeches at but he also can’t hit the low notes jason can
a happy medium for the best batboy😌
tim drake has a higher leaning voice
if he’s mumbling along to a song it sounds like some indie back up vocals that are already auto tuned beyond belief
no one has ever heard him sing besides alfred and the one time bruce didn’t knock on his door and heard him
he can hit the notes but they don’t sound normal
like they’re not bad but they do not sound anything like how they’re suppose to
damian literally has such a beautiful voice
it’s a deep baritone
subconsciously hums along to his classical music while studying and it sounds like heaven on earth
this is gonna sound absolutely insane but his voice sounds like how the lindt master chocolatier looks in those commercials
over all his voice is a ten out of ten even though no one has heard it but talia when he was like seven
alfred can do anything and that includes singing
can he reenact the entire cats musical as a one man show because an eight year old master dick asked him too? absa fuxking lootely he can
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cubeswhump · 3 years
Text
Part Six: Shatter
Hey y’all @more-miserables and I are back from the dead. 
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Okay okay I'm really sorry for my absence I don't even know what the hell I've been doing. Anyway, here we are.
Huge thanks to @haro-whumps for helping me with the plot and thanks to anyone who's stuck around.
Tagging @haro-whumps @albino-whumpee @broken-horn @eatyourdamnpears @whumpsblog @more-miserables
Warnings for institutionalized slavery, power abuses, victim blaming, dehumanization, violence, blood, hints of dubcon (nothing explicit). Skeevy stuff.
"I've given you every fucking reason to trust me!"
"You stick your dick in anything with a pulse!”
She pressed the heels of her hands against her ears but the noise grew louder.
“She’s just going through a phase!”
“She’s out of control!”
Sweetie clenched her teeth against the throbbing in her head.
Michelle was awake so she had to be too, though it wasn’t like she could anyway with all the noise. She paced about her room, forcing herself to listen to Kurt and Michelle’s shouting, because if she let her mind wander she would imagine herself in a different home with long hair and no-
Bad, very bad. This was her home and she was very happy with Michelle as her owner... more so when Kurt wasn’t here.
No, no. She loved Kurt because Miss Michelle loved Kurt and she loved Miss Michelle... Wait, no, Miss Michelle said not to even look at Kurt, but...
She draped a scarf from her cat-ear headband and stuck it on her head. Flicking the scarf back and striding about, she could pretend that was long hair she felt down her back even while she stayed grounded in the apartment she loved, listening to the owner she loved so bicker with the man Sweetie... existed in the same space as.
“Don’t put your fucking hands on me!”
The scarf and headband had scarcely touched the carpet before Sweetie was out the door, exiting the hall, flinging herself between the man and woman.
“DON’T HURT HER!” Sweetie screeched.
They could hear each and every breath, her heartbeat, a pin dropping on the pavement outside as two sets of eyes bore into her.
“Don’t... what do you take me for?” Kurt asked incredulously.
A tug on a lock of hair near Sweetie’s nape, sharp and quick. Again, longer.
“Look at me! NOW”
The world slowed as Sweetie turned and looked into her owner’s red face.
“What the fuck has gotten into you?”
“I thought...”
“You didn’t think! You don’t! Nothing goes on in that stupid fucking head of yours!” Michelle roared it, anger defying gravity as spittle flew up into the tall girl’s face. “I said not to leave your room, and you come out screaming like a banshee. What the fuck?”
She grabbed Sweetie’s wrist, nails biting into her skin as they went toward the smaller bedroom. She let go and pointed at the air mattress, calling after Sweetie as the latter hurried into the room, “Do I need to remind you to stay like you’re a fucking dog?”
The door slammed shut.
“Oh, good, it’s not just me you’re a bitch to,” Kurt snorted.
Sweetie pressed her hands against her ears again, sitting on her bed.
Fuck Kurt. She wished the elevator would fall when he got on it and they could go back to the time before Kurt, their wonderful grace period. The party ruined everything. Kurt, the Heathers, those other people... They should all just...
No. Sweetie loved Michelle and Michelle loved her friends so Sweetie loved Michelle’s friends because Michelle loved them and Sweetie loved Michelle... But Sweetie was for Michelle and Michelle alone so don’t love the friends, only love Michelle...
What was the answer?
“No, no,” Sweetie mumbled to herself. Serve Michelle, don’t wish death on anyone. She was a pet, how dare she act like she was better than anyone? She lifted her hand near her face but lowered it, then raised it again to tug on her hair.
Why would she disobey a command? Of course Kurt wouldn’t harm Michelle. And now Michelle was upset with her.
Sweetie couldn’t imagine Michelle, or rather anyone, scrolling down a page, looking at her horsey, too long face and general... just seeing everything about her and going, “Perfect, I’ll have that one.”
Whatever it was, it was luck. Her face was too long and her feet were too big and her body was a weird shape and she couldn’t follow a simple instruction. And one return, on top of that! She was a refurb!
Oh, that was it. She would be refurbished, no doubt. Michelle was the best thing that had happened to her, and to lose her... And there would be no finding another buyer, not with that face and that record. But she wouldn’t want a new owner, no one but Michelle.
“People like me don’t usually have boxies,” Michelle had told her recently. It was during some free time together, and Michelle was combing Sweetie’s hair. Sweetie wanted to pause time and savor this moment.
“People like you?” Sweetie asked.
“College kids renting apartments. The middle class. You’d probably cost a bit more than you did but my dad cashed in a favor or something. Got you for my birthday.”
“A favor?”
“Yeah, some WRU employee owed him, so he pulled some strings and we got you cheap.” She’d set the comb down then and leaned until her chest pressed against Sweetie’s back, pushing with every breath as she wrapped her arms around Sweetie. Her breath had tickled Sweetie’s ear. “You know, even if you cost a fortune, you’d be worth every penny.”
Sweetie wrapped her arms around herself as Michelle’s voice trailed off in her memory. No real voices filled the silence.
She waited a heartbeat, and another, and another. She scarcely breathed. Was Kurt really gone? 
She stood by the door and listened. Was it all right to leave the room? She could taste her breath by now and wanted to brush her teeth, and she could stand to use the bathroom.
The door squeaked as she was leaving the bathroom after. She flinched, eyes squeezing shut.
Peeling them open, she almost felt... confident. She crept across the living room and to the kitchen. Just a glass of water for her dry throat. Fill, drink, wash, retreat. Don’t leave again until she’s given permission.
She stopped dead in her tracks. Michelle stood at the counter with her back to Sweetie, head bent. Sweetie could had gone back to her room, but sniffle cemented her feet to the ground.
“Miss Michelle?”
Michelle whirled around, gripping her phone so tightly it just about snapped in half. Sweetie couldn’t fully see her face in the fading evening light leaking in through the window, but she imagined tracks of tears and furrowed eyebrows, inviting eyes, no trace of anger. She would open her arms and tell Sweetie she forgave her.
“Miss Michelle, are you all right? I’m sorry for my disobedience and upsetting you so.”
Michelle’s  hand fumbled behind her before shooting forward. Sweetie didn’t have time to process before icy liquid soaked her and the plastic cup bounced off her shoulder. 
“Oh!” was all she could manage.
Michelle slammed her phone down and yanked open one cabinet after another, throwing plates and bowls and cups. Sweetie squeaked and dodged but didn’t quite dare run and retreat even as glass exploded inches from her head and bit into her feet.
“DID I SAY YOU COULD FUCKING LEAVE YOUR ROOM?” Michelle screamed. “Again, you pull this shit! AGAIN! You’re such a fucking failure! You’re a mistake! STOP APOLOGIZING!”
Sweetie clamped her mouth shut. A thick glass - oh no, was that Michelle’s favorite mug? - hit Sweetie right on her breastbone and she spluttered, trying to catch her breath.
Michelle seemed to take a moment to catch her breath too, a hand against her chest. Sweetie dropped to her knees and ignored the stabbing pin in them, frantically picking up glass shards. She kept dropping pieces and she was sure she was getting blood on the floor but this made her start picking them up faster.
“Oh, Sweetie.” Michelle took a step forward.
“Watch out, you’ll cut your feet!” Sweetie squeaked.
Michelle walked tiptoe and leaned to flick on the light behind Sweetie, looking down at her. She placed a hand on Sweetie’s back.
“Drop that glass, we can worry about that later.” Her voice was so soft now, and Sweetie hesitated to do so. “Go on, we can come back with a broom once you’re taken care of. Look what you’ve done to yourself.”
“I’m- I’m so sorry.” Sweetie carefully set the glass down, but a few pieces stayed stuck in her skin. It looked as if she was wearing red gloves.
“Yeah, I’m sure you are. I’m sorry too, you just made me so mad. Now you’ve made me do this and you got yourself all cut up.” Michelle helped her stand, tutting and stroking her hair as the movement shifted the glass in her knees and feet. “Oh, you’re bleeding all over. And you’ve got such a mess here.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
“Shh, I know. Let’s get you fixed up. Then you can clean this mess and I’ll order takeout, yeah? No need to make a big dinner, you can take it easy.”
“I can clean the mess now.”
“No, I can’t have you work while you’re all cut up, Sweets.”
Sweetie breathed out, barely feeling a thing as they walked to the bathroom. The nickname hung in the air. Things were okay again.
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Note
So I decided to put my playlist titled MAXIMUM DRAMA on to read your deniall btl fic and can I just share some gems that happened: Niall showed up to Dev’s to the tune of My Heart Will Go On, Dev realized this wasn’t just making out to Do You Hear The People Sing?, They started undressing to Far Over The Misty Mountains Cold, Dev appreciated Niall’s dick to Drive It Like You Stole it and blew him to Chariots of Fire, and Dev finally got off to Defying Gravity. Just thought you’d like to know :)
this is the best fucking thing I’ve read in my entire life, first of all. thank you so much for sharing; it truly is a gift.
now story time: Mr HH recently stopped working nights after two years, so he’s back to sleeping in the bed at night—along with our two big dogs & usually one of the cats. The animals sort of sardined me last night to the point where I woke up around 4am because I was super uncomfortable. So for whatever reason I check my phone—& this is what I find. I read it in a haze, then fall back into fitful sleep where I dream about Dev & how I can’t believe I forgot to write about his OCD in the DeNiall fic, the fuck????? LMAOOOO & then to wake up at a normal time this morning & read this absolute gift to humankind again...just thank you.
Chariots of Fire & Defying Gravity are really getting to me
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my friend’s impression of star wars
I have a few friends who haven't seen Star Wars or have seen like two movies out of order with no context. So Star Wars came up in conversation and I decided to do an experiment. I asked one of them her opinion on/impression of a bunch of Star Wars characters, and I can’t tell how much of this she was joking about. (Some stuff has been edited for clarity, and my notes are in italics)
Without further ado: Greedo: he's one of the seven deadly sins and he hoards Oreos. I mean, his name does sound like greed. I don't know how she got Oreos Mon Mothma: he's a moth. h e ' s Bail Organa: is she a robot? s h e Admiral Piett: He's a cat dude. If I write anything that features him as a background character, you know what's going to happen Amilyn Holdo: I don't even know who that is. fair Darth Maul: He's the red dude who looks like a burnt death eater. I bet he collects tomatoes. I see how she got burnt death eater Yoda: he's a green Kermit dude who floats accurate Chewbacca: Oh I know him, he's the robot... his name sounds like a chocolate bar. Lando Calrissian: He sounds evil. Is he a traitor or a general or something? HOW WAS SHE SO ACCURATE WTF. I'm not saying Lando's evil but he does betray Han and he is a general, so that's two out of three Poe Dameron: He sounds super evil.... does he try to kill the bear person? I think she got him confused with Kylo Ren Rey: Oh, that's the girl. Is she a princess? She's a rebel or something. She's all like 'I'm the last Jedi dramatic dramatic, please don't kill me I have the Force' look, some people would 100% agree with you, and some would murder you for saying that Obi-wan: Isn't he like Darth Vader? He gets burnt alive in lava. Padme: she's the queen woman. Doesn't she marry a really young dude? I'm gonna say she's a lesbian and I think she's related to Rey somehow. Her name sounds like Panadol. She wears a weird crown, doesn't she say 'I don't like sand'? okay some people would agree with you on almost all of those counts. I'm surprised she got the sand thing, actually Anakin Skywalker: I bet people call him Annie and he hates it. He wears black, he's emo. Doesnt he get his face burnt or something and kills one of the bad guys? ...yeah, pretty much Han Solo: I think he's single. Does he use his name in puns like 'I'm going Solo'? He kind of sounds like a pop star Han absolutely uses his name in puns; he's just Like That™️ Luke Skywalker: meh.  Okay ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Leia Organa: Her name sounds Jamaican. Does she like fruit? I'm renaming her Leah. She has the gravity repellent ((inside joke)) Is she a Disney Princess, I bet she's best friends with Ariel ((one of my other friends asked 'doesn't she date Rey' and I--)) Does she join the dark side? She should, they have cookies over there. Not gonna lie, those dark side cookies at pretty good The Jedi: They're a bunch of dicks. Can't they defy gravity? Sure? The Rebellion: they're like an evil army they want to build a wall around something they're like the Winter Soldiers of Star Wars. ?????????????????? This wasn't even edited because I can't work out what she's trying to say The Empire: they're just trying to protect their peaceful planets, leave them alone guys. All I can think of is this scene now:
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princess-havok · 6 years
Text
Pop Kids Read-Through: Chapters 6-10
This section of the book covers pages 35-58.
What happens?
Mike & Sarah hook up in the projection booth at the theatre where he works. Mike is not engaged in the moment, worrying about his clothes getting dirty and the prospect of detailing this encounter to Zach later. In short, he’s concerned for his image and anticipating reaction from his peers. That’s important for his ultimate goal of being famous for being famous -- everything becomes staged, everything becomes material for a story or a social media post later and social capital becomes more important than real human connection. Reading this section reminded me of this interview because I think it’s the same point being made. Mike is not living in the moment.
After this, Sarah leaves with his shirt (because hers has cum on it) and he starts clicking his lighter again. That habit is tied to Sarah, and possibly to sex.
Later, Sarah won’t return his texts and it’s clearly causing him anxiety. This is the first time we see him think “I have to clean” (pg 43) in relation to his arson. Earlier, though, when he and Zach are exploring the hotel for the first time, he says it’s in need of a cleaning, which in the moment is easy to write off as a literal statement since it’s filthy down there, but might actually be foreshadowing.
Mike and Zach start planning the party in earnest, which seems to involve copious online shopping. Again, Mike doesn’t think twice about using Zach’s family’s money for this and even tries to sneak in a pair of $500 sunglasses for himself. It’s Zach who has to talk him out of it, but they still spend untold amounts on inflatable mattresses, throw pillows and faux fur throw rugs.
At home, with Sarah still not responding to him, he and Gina talk briefly about another church burning down. This is the day after his activities in the projection both with Sarah, after which he needed to clean, but even in his inner monologue he seems entirely divorced from the burned down church and makes a casual comment about it to Gina. It almost comes across like he doesn’t remember it, or doesn’t connect himself to that.
Mike and Zach are skateboarding outside Zach’s house when The Twins, whom we finally learn are named Drew and Michelle, walk by with Becca. The entire scene serves so little purpose and literally just seems to be a reason for the twins to tell the guys that Jamie and Sarah, respectively, are into them. Like, the twins serve zero other purpose here. Becca only seems to be there for Mike to fantasize over -- she’s wearing another band shirt he likes and he can see her side boob.
The best part about the whole scene is that we meet Dustin, Zach’s little brother, who is so good and so pure and does not deserve any of this narrative. He’s introduced as he’s jumping out a window and immediately plays along with Mike’s joke about being his boyfriend. To be honest, that entire exchange actually seems like the most natural flow of dialogue so far in this book. Mike’s description of Dustin is “People think he’s coked out, but I know that he’s actually just really stoked” (47), and later as everyone else is caught up in their own stuff, he’s skating on his own and cheering himself on: “Punishing the ramp, defying gravity, he vocally approves of his own tricks, mid-air. ‘Sick! Whatttt? No Way! He’s so handsome--” (48) and it is so, so endearing. Dustin, too, has a girl -- a grown-ass woman named Star, who is a surfer in her twenties -- essentially grooming him, and no one seems concerned by this. I’m so charmed by Dustin already that I want somebody to care, he’s 15, and deserves better.
Mike and Zach enlist the help of The Boys - Hector and David - to haul all their purchases over to the hotel to set up for the party. The Boys are... very stereotypically Mexican. They call Mike “Miguellito” and say “dios mio” and generally just seem like your basic ‘Latinx characters as written by a white dude’ tropes. They’re also a couple, though, and it seems like Mike can only fathom that in terms of their sex life. But Mike can’t really process anything except in terms of sex.
Zach & Mike set up for the party and develop their screennames -- so far, Mike has no objection at all to Scorsese like he claimed in the prologue, maybe because it hasn’t been shortened yet.
Mike goes home and designs the invitations. And looks at porn. There is a lot of care and description put into what he does and how he designs them, what he writes, everything. That is something that, as I recall, lessens as the parties continue.
Throughout all the planning of the Premiere, Mike is less fixated on the fact that Sarah hasn’t returned his texts. He notices when he finishes the invite that she has actually texted him, and that’s where the section ends.
There are a few other things to talk about in this section of the book:
Moths
Mike sees a moth float around Becca for the first time on page 49. This happens after she hints at visiting him at work and he takes it as a suggestion that she’ll fuck him there like Sarah did.
Bad Euphemisms
We’re introduced to the phrase “oral joy” used for blow jobs in this section. I forgot to point out, back in chapter 1 is the first instance of Mike calling his dick his Producer. The Bad Euphemisms are definitely a Thing, but I’m going to put a pin in those because I don’t quite know what to make of them all yet.
Women
Women so far in this book are a huge red flag for me. The girls are almost literally just sex objects with nothing to their characters outside of that, except what Mike projects onto Becca based on her clothing and employment, but even she may have done some nude modeling. Zach’s mom has only made one appearance and it’s been to bicker with her husband and ask him to come on vacation with her. It appears she doesn’t work. Mike’s mom is pretty much a 50s housewife. At least two girls over the age of 20 (Mike’s former babysitter and Star) have been shown to act inappropriately towards underage boys. Every other female who isn’t a car who’s written about in passing is a socialite/”hairdresser”/party girl/porn star. There is not one female character so far with any sort of depth, let alone a “strong female character.” It bothers me.
Cats
-Mike spots the gray Manx again as they’re pulling into the parking lot to drop off the party supplies
-Eddie makes another appearance, pawing at Mike’s neck when he wakes up.
So that’s two cats here, although both have appeared before. The cumulative cat count remains at 4.
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49scribes-a · 7 years
Text
Starters From Shit Said In Gaming Streams:
Some NSFW and potentially triggering content
“Yeah sometimes those big zombies just don't take the hint and then half their bodies come after me.”
“Stop throwing up zombies. Its unsanitary.”
“Thigh highs fit for any _____.”
“BARREL ROLL.”
“Stop keeping quotes about the shit I say when I'm _________.”
“OH, RAPID FIRE. RAPID FIRE. LOOK AT THAT.”
“...whatever the fuck that shit is.”
*sarcastically* “Oh nooo... an ambush. Like, whatever will I do.”
“Y'know I would've fallen from whatever height that was and I would've gotten up.”
“OYNO. Where is it? KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT.”
“Ew it popped.”
“____lord disapproves.”
“Rocking that [name]licious scarf.”
“SHIT ITS BOY/GIRLFRIEND IS COMING.”
“Oh, shit, that's a lot.”
“Of course half of them had to live.”
“Oh did you die finally? Thanks for the money! Even if you only had ___.”
“You made people suffer enough when you were alive. Can't you, y'know, give it a rest?”
“I'm little red riding hood~”
" 'Just got [name]'d'. WOW. You really gonna go there?”
“Already went there.”
“Okay I'm bored. I'm gonna leave it. I'm gonna leave it alone.”
“Op she's vomitting zombies.”
“Deeeeaaaaaath.”
“[name]licious used Swift! Its super effective!”
“Please stop.”
“Whoa that star kinda freaked out.”
“Pop goes the zombubble.”
“Y'know whenever people say [ran him through with a sword] I think of someone like literally running and PLUNGING their sword through someone.”
“If ur sword-running game ain't as strong as Season 2 Suzaku's y'ain't doin it right.”
“We don't talk about that ending. That still hurts me.”
“OF COURSE WE DO. You know what we REALLY don't talk about?"
“WE DON’T TALK ABOUT _____.”
“The goat people!!! And the trees...”
“We've got demonic goat people, I think some frogs... yep, definitely a frog.”
“This house is on fire but it wasn't me.”
“Ooooo legendary shoulders.”
“Oh great, they explode.”
“Biiiirb. Birb birb birb birb. Caw caw motherclucker. BIIIIIRB.”
“I'm going to name this bird ______, and it will be the best ______.”
“Did you just name that ____ after [name]?”
“[name]licious and [name]. Nice(tm).”
“You could've lived if you just stayed still like a good tree.”
“Swift Game Intensifies.”
“Cat Fight!”
“Long time no dick shot.”
"[NAME] YOU ARE BANNED.”
“Holy shit that was a trip.”
“The sweet sound of projectile evisceration.”
“Anybody alive on this side? Okay good I don't need that kind of drama in my life.”
“I COULDN'T STOP PUNCHING HIM.”
“Story of my life.”
“I love how you got literally blown away.”
“Fuck your _____-- SHIT, FUCK--”
“We forgot to start a swear count.”
“Explode, explode, explode-- yyeeaaaaa.”
“I HATE LIFE WHAT IS THAT HOW DID I MISS”
“RIPPERONI SWISS CHEESE”
“Don't you give me your patronizing pats I don't need them.”
“See if I ever give you sympathy pats again.”
“I'm still keeping quotes just fyi.”
“Fucking gasp.”
“BLOWUP BLOWUP BLOWUP BLOWUP.”
“STOP TAKING QUOTES, [NAME] oh my god--”
“I need to take that guy over there with that freaking shotgun Hell nya.”
“YOINK.”
“Eeeeew he ragdolled...”
“Uuuh what did you guys see-- actually nope no I take it back I don't wanna know I don't wanna know what you guys saw.”
“2 much swear 4 utube.”
“I... read that as [do you know how many brain dead dick heads I've hung in my life] and I was like... since when did you kill people?”
“If I killed people you would know because I wouldn't be able to keep my disgusting disection pictures to my fucking self.”
"[CHECK OUT THIS ORGAN LOOK HOW WEIRD IT IS].”
“I was going to laugh if you pole-vaulted to your doom.”
“Well, no, you can swing across. Me? I'm gonna get fUCKED.”
“HIS LEG WORK.”
“I'M IN ATUAL TEARS.”
“I'm like... expecting something to blow up at this poi-- aaand there it is.”
“I don't know what you're reaching for cuz God ain't gonna help you.”
“Wouldn't it be funny if he hit the window and he just... didn't go through it. Just hit the window with a loud THUNK like a bird hitting glass.”
“That rocket launcher is gonna become my best friend.”
“YOU STILL FUCKING SURVIVED THAT SHIT? YOU TOOK IT TO THE /FACE/.”
“Fuck off, I don't want what you're selling-- I DON'T WANT WHAT YOU'RE SELLING.”
“Fuck your turret gun.”
“Fuck it.”
“YEAA-- NOOOOO.”
“How did that not just shove his nose into his skull?”
“I wouldn't have gotten back up, I would've been down. I would've probably been knocked out or... winded... and crying.”
“Yea fuck you _______ I don't like you either.”
“Her name is _____ lady and _____ lady it shall stay.”
“I can't wait to-- Oh look another fucking _______.”
“MAN, HE TWIRLLLED.”
“When I die, I want to ragdoll.”
“Why ragdoll like an Uncharted NPC when you can ragdoll like a Skyrim character leaping off the top of the Throat of the World on the back of a horse.”
“The music is so nice when you don't pay attention to the destruction around you.”
“I want to glitch through the ground, stretching for miles across the land while twitching enough to unnerve the most bad ass fucker before flipping off into space like a goddamn hyper speed rubber band.”
“You want the weirdest things...”
“But they are simple things.”
“How is her makeup still straight. Eye liner still on point.”
“HEY LOOK ITS YOU-- I'm just kidding.”
“You hurt my feelings, that IS totally me.”
“Worship me and my big blue ball.”
“Oh that werewolf fucker. Fucking closet furry.”
“Manicure my _____ nails.”
“I know, I have to fix your ass because all your shit is where its not supposed to be.”
“WELL ITS NOT FUN IF I MAKE IT EASY.”
“DO U THINK I WANT PEOPLE IN HERE TOUCHING ALL MY SECRET SHIT.”
“I GOT PORN MAGS IN HERE.”
“You know I just kinda realized how weird of a pose that is.”
“Tbh -- its taking a huge shit.”
“For some reason I forgot the water drains and thought the statue's loin cloth lifts to reveal a doorway between its legs.”
“God damn it, tired of your bullshit. Have to keep fixing your stuff. Keep fixing your ______...”
“This isn't a dagger. Its a _____. But I'd still stab someone with it.”
*Opens my chastity belt.*
“You know its actually kinda romantic down here---no its not.”
“I transcended the ban like a boss.”
“YOU'RE STILL BANNED, [NAME].”
“GET VORED BY THE STATUE.”
“WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS.”
“I really hope I get that job so I can buy that shirt that says [_______] I've been wanting.”
“No, the part with the ice caves, before you meet Furry McFuckgoat.”
“While that is a very metal fucking way to die -- it also seems extremely uncomfortable.”
“I was surprised there wasn't anything supernatural... or weird. I mean besides the exploding mummies.”
“WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THOSE GOLEM POSERS.”
“What a dick! Making me throw that grenade without meaning to!”
“You know I just shot him... a clip full... in the dick. I didn't mean to but... it happened.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
“Have a grenade.”
“Yeah you're not allowed up here. You have a ______. We don't serve your kind here.”
“New user -- who dis”
“I might regret this decision later.”
“[Name], please, stop playing peek-a-boo.”
“That dead guy just... waves goodbye as he ragdolls.”
“I HAVE REGRETS.”
“You know what, just as well. I have regrets. I didn't mean to throw that grenade.”
“PANICKING. PANICKING.”
“THINK YOU'RE FUCKING FANCY WITH YOUR ROLLING?”
“Okay that guy was defying gravity for a while there, that was kinda weird.”
“YOU'RE NOT FANCY-- Oh my god he twirled.”
“I FOUND WHAT I WANT.” *runs*
“REGRETS. Aaaah, regrets. A lot of regrets.”
“That death twitch... as seen on Twitch TV.”
“Little man, compensating much.”
“Right in the Shnoz.”
“ZIG ZAG, ZIG ZAG.”
“I DON'T THINK ZIG ZAG WORKS WITH MILITARY RPGS.”
“Make-up still on point. Hair still flawless.”
“LAMINATE YOUR FUCKING MAP. ITS RAINING. IS THAT MAP EVEN RELIABLE AT THIS POINT.”
“Where would you laminate a map in ______? What do you think there's a Kinkos around the corner?
“GOD IDK, BUT PUT IT IN SOMETHING MORE WATERPROOF THAN YOUR ASS POCKET.”
“Oh man that is the best twirl I have ever seen.”
“Fab. He practiced.”
“I just had to process Impressed because I heard it as Imp Breasts.”
“Drama queen. Fucking clutching his chest to die. Just ragdoll like everyone else.”
“Hey, what has more brains than the gunmen right now? The wall behind them.”
"[that didn't attract too much attention] YOU RAN A TRAIN THROUGH A BUILDING.”
“I am just a soggy man.”
“I have water logged fingers.”
“Yeah. YEAH. I forgot about these actually. Ah... ha ha... I forgot about these...” *cries*
“Her tits are always bigger from the side. The fuck is with that. They never the same size either. Watch. Watch them titties grow.”
“All Aboard the Pain Train.”
“Push your ass off the train-- BYE.”
“REALLY. YOU-- who has the strength of a shit ton of fucking monkeys... can't kick that through?”
“My heart just did A Thing at being called [they].”
“I never actually see the scenery on this train because I'm always dying.”
“BANE OF MY EXISTENCE RIGHT HERE. Guess my streak of Not Dying is gonna end right here.”
“AAH I ALMOST DIED-- I almost died there too.”
“SPLAT.”
“Railroaded.”
“Oh, I'm gonna have to fight a big guy. I really-- please don't make me fight a big guy.”
“Damn he thicc.”
“Here, its a present~” *throws a grenade*
“I think they want a receipt for their present so they can return it.”
“Bye-- I think that was a dick shot.”
“I love the sound of glass breaking.”
“I missed...” *tsk* “That's a problem.”
“Hey. For stress relief, fling yourself. Right there. To the left.”
“LAAAAAAAAUNCH.”
“Just fucking launch into oblivion for stress relief.”
“I just ate someone else’s half eaten burger like the trash goblin I am.”
“I am both mildly disgusted with myself and yet satisfied because it was a good burger.”
“Oblivion is to the left. Just launch into it. Embrace it. Fly like the majestic fucking eagle you are.”
*singing* “Life... hates me. I hate life.”
“Did he just die crab walking.”
“Died doing what he loved. Being a crab. Snip snap.”
“Am I the only one here who sees perfect opportunities to fling myself off a cliff and actually does it?”
*whimpers* “WELLIguessitwasallfornothingbecausenowIhavetodiebecausethisasshole--”
“That's the sound of when you get your ass shredded.”
“Good lord--”
“Shredded Wheat [name]s.”
“I hope if I ever die by gun, its to one of those. I wanna look and feel like swiss cheese.”
“You gonna one-punch fuck me like jason borne?”
“ONE PAAAUUUUUUUUNCH.”
“FUCK I got stuck in the wall...”
“HOW THICK THAT DUDES ARMS ARE.”
“STAY AWAY FROM ME I was trying to get away from you.”
“That cat is looking at me like [Why are you yelling so much?]”
“Man you eat more bullets than dogs in Resident Evil.”
“Fuck my life, Terminator.”
“That's not his liver...”
“That's totally his liver.”
“Well that's what you get for not paying for your train ticket.”
“Train stops here.”
“Guess they got... sidetracked.”
“You could say he's got a one-track mind.”
“You could say its been derailed.”
“I don't think this is the best train of thought for this situation.”
"I think I can, I think I can...”
“YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE, SNEAKING UP ON ME LIKE THAT.”
“I hope I took them out wiTH MY DEATH.”
“Fucking gave him a sliding icy nut shot.”
“Packed some powder onto those donut holes.”
“I didn't say I was coming naked to this place.”
“Just barrel roll over a fucking corpse it coo'l.”
“Where do these fuckers get grenades at like... they need to shove their grenades up their ass.”
“I don't know what the fuck you think you saw but it wasn't me.”
*Hands you voreos*
“Get out of here with your voreos.”
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Text
I was tagged by @captainatalya
Rules: Answer the questions and tag 20 blogs you want to get to know better
Nicknames: Desi or Des, though I just prefer Destiny usually
Star sign: Sagittarius, though I’m more of a Virgo, so…
Height: 5'7
Time right now: 10:33
Last thing you googled: 
Fave music artist: Anthem Lights
Song stuck in my head: Defying Gravity from Wicked
Last movie I watched: Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
Last tv show I watched: Young Justice (again 😂)
What I’m wearing right now: Fluffy pajama pants, a purple hoodie, and fuzzy socks. I also have my cat sleeping on top of my shoulder, so that’s happening right now.
When I created this blog: I think two years ago or so 
The kind of stuff I post: Batfamily, Young Justice, Voltron, pretty much anything DC, Tim Drake, ships, headcanons, and a bunch of other geeky stuff I love
Do I get asks regularly?: Yeah, I usually get headcanons and ideas from so many awesome creative people and I love it
Why did I choose my url: I’ve got really bad self-esteem issues
Gender: Girl
Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff
Pokémon team: Instinct 
Favorite color: Pink
Average hours of sleep: Either 9 or 3, there is no in between
Lucky number: 16
Favorite characters: Argh, SOOOO MANYYY. Tim Drake, Keith Kogane, Jason Todd, Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne, Cassandra Cain, Roy Harper, Wally West, Artemis Crock, Conner Kent, Garfield Logan, Barry Allen, Cisco Ramon, Shiro, Lance McClain, Hunk Garrett, Pidge Gunderson aka Katie Holt, Coran, Stephanie Brown, Kaldur'ahm, Bart Allen, Barbara Gordon, Alex Karev, Colin Wilkes, M'gann M'orzz, Batcow, Jaime Reyes, Killian Jones, Selina Kyle, Harley Quinn, Oliver Queen, Blaine Anderson, Kurt Hummel, Finn Hudson, Santana Lopez, Rachel Berry, Noah Puckerman, Sam Evans, Billy Batson, and SO. MANY. OTHERS.
Dream job: Author or a housewife (pls don’t judge)
Number of blankets I sleep with: 2, one comforter and one really fluffy one I bought for five dollars at Wal-Mart
Following: 197 
To be honest my brain is kind of fried right now and I'm not up to figuring out 20 amazing people to tag, so anyone who sees this and is fabulous and wants to do it can :)  
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