reblog to scare the aphobes

Kinda curious as to if people prefer to use the umbrella terms or not. Personally I tend to use umbrella terms (for me just ace) out of total laziness since explaining all the time is beyond tedious for me 🙃

Small but mighty! Ace Los Angeles representing at Long Beach Pride 2023 🖤🤍💜

Fur babies support ace and aro people too 😎

Officer it’s not what it looks like

were not gay and doing crimes

happy pride bitches

-Martha the sus heart necklace from barbie and the diamond castle

and @thecakeswithnocream -aka the cheeseball, "cheesiest ball on earth"

Demisexuality: Type of sexuality where a person experiences sexual attraction only after establishing a strong bond with someone. This strong bond can consist of either a romantic relationship or a strong friendship.

It is one of the many shades of asexuality. It lies in the middle between asexuality and allosexuality. It should not be confused with chastity or sexual abstinence, and therefore IT'S NOT A CHOICE.

A demisexual person can be gay, lesbian, straight, bi, etc. but many people struggle to understand this.

Months ago I was defined by a TERF as a "spicy straight woman who wants to pretend to be discriminated against" when she herself was discriminating against me and it is a fact that people on the asexual spectrum are discriminated against both inside and out the LGBTQIA+ community itself.

We exist, and we will not stand down.

Let’s talk about what demisexuality

Very basically, demisexuality describes a sexual orientation in which a person does not experience sexual attraction to anyone of any gender unless a close bond is formed. This does not mean they are attracted to everyone they are bonded with, nor is it just abstaining from sex.

Abstinence is a choice anyone of any sexual orientation can make, and is a choice about sexual behavior. Celibacy is also a choice anyone of any sexual orientation can make, and is a choice about sexual behavior. Both are often confused for asexuality, but asexuality is a sexual orientation which describes a spectrum of little to no sexual attraction, and sexual behavior for aces can vary from ace to ace.

Demisexuality describes how attraction is formed, rather than who it is towards. For this reason many demisexuals choose to delineate their romantic orientation separately. For example if I’m romantically attracted to the same gender, I would be a homoromantic demisexual.

This is predicated on the idea of splitting romantic, sexual, and even tertiary attractions via the Split Attraction Model, or SAM. While many demisexuals us the SAM, not all do nor is it required.

Demisexuals can be any romantic orientation. This means a demisexual may or may not be aromantic or alloromantic. Demisexuals aren’t necessarily demiromantic; demiromantics aren’t necessarily demisexual.

Demisexuality exists under the spectrum of asexuality because it describes sexual attraction that is only experienced under a specific condition and context. The term originated on forums discussing the gray area of asexuality on @avenpt forums between 2003-2006. The rumor that it was started for a fictional character for a role play isn’t true; the link in this paragraph has citations and screenshots showing where it was originally coined.

Being demisexual doesn’t automatically mean that you’re sex favorable. This misconception stems from the idea that “all women are demisexual”, which misconstrues the spectrums of gender and asexuality, and also robs allosexual women and feminine people of their sexual autonomy. Choosing to not have sex until you trust the person isn’t the same as not experiencing sexual attraction to anyone at all until a specific bond forms, and not with every bond. The perception that only women would ever wait until there’s trust to have sex isn’t true either; anyone of any sexual orientation and gender can make that choice.

The more common misconceptions about demisexuality, and asexuality as a whole, are largely based in ideals around conservative Evangelical Christianity; that is to say the heteronormative notion that women and feminine people are inherently “more” asexual than our male counterparts. This is false. Not only is demisexuality’s existence (and asexuality’s existence) not predicated on gender, it is an experience of conditional sexual attraction, not sexual behavior or action. This view is dehumanizing and plays into seeing women and feminine people as objects whose sexuality only exists for the pleasure of others instead of complex people. In addition it boils men and masculine people down to only desiring sex for its carnal pleasure, rather than viewing them as whole people, and erases the experiences of ace men and masculine people.

Anyone can be ace; anyone can be demisexual. Aces can also have and enjoy sex for a variety of reasons. While many don’t have sex, it’s not true as a rule. Aces can have and enjoy sex, or not have sex at all.

I hope if you’re demisexual, you’re having a great day and you feel valid about yourself! Because you are.

reminder to my fellow demiromantic and demisexual friends that just because you have experienced romantic and sexual feelings to someone, it doesn't make you any less aspec. the way we experience these feelings is in no way similar to the way people around us seem to do it. we are a valid and valuable part of the aro and ace communities. thanks if you read this 💚💜.

Chibi Engineer Mark 🌈 Pride Tea aesthetic ☕️✨

Part two - Here & Part three - Here

(Let me know if there’s other Pride colors you’d like to see and I’ll add them 💕)

"Demi Aspec"

Being demisexual and/or demiromantic is not the norm and it absolutely isn't just a word for having standards. It isn't a preference. It's an experience that is too often misunderstood.

Happy Ace Awareness Month from our queen! 🖤🩶🤍💜

Celebrating day 11 of Pride Month with an adorable Black-capped Chickadee perched among some Queen of the Night Tulips, representing Demisexual Pride! 🤍💜🖤🩶

Demisexual Sword Angel. One of my favorite childhood games was World of Warcraft, so I took inspiration from the iconic sword Frostmourne for the redesign. Let me know in the poll if you prefer it with or without the banner - and if you have an idea for a different saying, let me know in the replies.

Demisexuals, where are you? 💜

Ace LA's very own Izzy is featured in this new video from Anthony Padilla! 

This video is about different assumptions that people make about asexual people. It already has over 200K views! Please go and support! 💜

Type in "Is Asexuality Even Real? Assumptions" on YouTube to watch! Or click here ✨

A finished pride ych for @dookerino and the alts for it as well! In order there are the bi, nonbinary, demisexual, and demiromantic flags

I was incredibly happy to get to make this piece, especially since I never really get to see much demi representation in pride pieces and as a demi person it was an extra special same flag sort of solidarity making these!

Happy Pride, beans. Take care of each other