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mayaree-darling · 4 months

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Hi i've been binging some of your fics recently and im in love! I saw that you had requests open so I was wondering if you could do scaramouche x fem reader but where reader dresses in jojifuku or other known as cutecore and scaramouche dresses in a baggy 'cool' way and reader gets made fun of for dressing differently?

of scary dog privileges & matcha lattes // scaramouche (modern au)

pairing: Scaramouche x Cutecore!Reader

synopsis: look, you may be a cute ball of pastels that can test scaramouche's patience, but you're HIS cute pastel lover. but if anyone messes with you, it's okay - his hands were made to be thrown.

from aree: for @amia-69: thanks for requesting and i hope this was satisfactory. i had too much fun with this so i hope you don't mind if it's a tad long with more scenes than you requested. i also made this a bit more feel-good by being a little silly but it’s still mostly serious, i hope you don't mind!

content: slight stalking and bullying scenario (be warned if triggering); very annoyed Scara means swearing; i'm in silly writer mode rn so this is a mix of crack and serious writing; slightly unhinged reader but hey so is scaramouche; praying this ain't OOC; fully accepted this is cringe; fem reader

fic length: 4k~ (unedited)

Scaramouche isn't dumb. He can tell anyone who sees him is asking it in their head.

How the fuck did you two end up together?

There was nothing soft looking about him besides the hair he inherited from his mother. He was his mother but with sharper lines, edges, and words. His eyes were almost a permanent glare if he didn't look bored or annoyed at everyone and everything. He always seemed to wear dark clothing, accompanied by the right amount of chains or belts here and there to complete the look, but they suited him nicely. If anything, he wore them best than most. If he wore anything less than clothes that didn't hang off his body he looked uncomfortable. Didn't mean he didn't hear enough older people talking about his choice of clothes though.

So when he first stood next to you on the fruits and vegetables aisle at the grocery store, he realized how you two stood at different ends of the fashion spectrum. He was there with his mother for their weekly food restock and ended up getting left behind when he went to check something on his phone (typical. How may times had this happened?) When he blinked, gone was his mom, and there beside him stood you, looking at a bunch of melons.

"This shit's overpriced, the hell." you grumble it under your breath, but Scaramouche heard it loud and clear. The snort he lets out isn't unnoticed by you and you turn to him, eyebrows raised. You look at him up and down before your eyes land back to his, and he frowns.

Goddamn it, here we go. He's heard his mom talk his ear off about the clothes this morning and he wasn't gonna hear it from anyone else. He opens his mouth, ready to cuss you to next Tuesday, but you beat him to it.

"I like the eyeliner," Scaramouche stares at you incredulously, and almost as a final nail into the coffin that he heard you right, you nod in approval. You tilt your head to the side. "I gotta say though. I think eyeshadow would look a lot better. Maybe... red? Just a bit at the corners. It would look a lot nice with your eye color and would make them pop considering you wear a lot of dark shades."

Scaramouche gapes at you. He's used to getting cussed out or getting the occasional talking to about his choices in life, but fashion advice was the last thing he expected to get from some stranger in the fruits aisle.

"Thanks..." he eventually lets out. He finally takes a moment to look you up and down and wonders how the hell did he not notice you sooner when you stood out from everything like a sore thumb.

Scaramouche didn't know there were so many shades of pink in the world. Or maybe he never noticed since he never wore clothes like that, and if he was honest, he spent time with people who didn't wear that color at all. Seeing it now was like a jumpscare, just a lot softer considering it's not like you posed any actual threat but slightly still as surprising considering people randomly approaching him first was so rare. If you weren't wearing a shade of pink, you were wearing some pastel shade of another color. Pastel blue, pastel purple, white lace here and there. The skirt you wore was so frilly you looked like you were walking around with a pink cloud. You looked... soft. That was the best summary Scaramouche could put together in the amount of time he gave you a once over.

You looked like everything he was not.

"I like... the frills," he inwardly cringed the moment he said it, but he ended up just frowning at you. It was your damn fault for putting him in this position in the first place so why the hell was he the one suffering. It's not his fault he wasn't good at giving other people compliments.

You laugh, and Scaramouche wasn't sure whether he should be glad you didn't take it to heart or be offended that he actually tried his best to give you a compliment only to be shot down. "It's okay. You don't have to force yourself."

Scaramouche just frowned deeper. Now it feels like you're saying he can't give out a compliment at all. He looks you up and down again and just says what comes to his head on the spot. "You look like the cotton candy sold at the fair across the street. Actually, I think you're a lot more pink than that stuff, but still lighter? Can't tell accurately with how many shades you got going on."

He must've said something good enough for you because you're grinning at him the next second. "That's one of the nicer ones people have said to me."

Scaramouche looks at you in disbelief. "How is that even remotely nice?"

"Well, for one, I know you mean that sincerely. Second, I'll have you know I worked hard to get pretty vibrant pinks that weren't too hard on the eyes, so thanks for confirming that!"

"You made that?" You nod, and Scaramouche nods back slowly in approval, actually impressed. "Not bad."

Your eyes land on his watch and you jolt, looking at the time on your phone. You pick a random melon even when he sees you scowl at the price tag and put it into your basket. Nodding once more to him, you turn around and leave. But as he watches you round the corner, you're running back to his side once more before he can even turn away. The sudden look of alarm on your face, so different from the grin and laughter you had on earlier, immediately has him on edge.

"Please help me," you whisper, but there was no one else in the aisle besides a mother and her baby at the far end. He frowns and looks to the side.

"Do I look like I help people." it came out harsher than he intended, but didn't he give you more than he was already willing to give any other stranger? Now you were just taking advantage of him.

"I need a scary dog right now," you said it so casually and seriously he wasn't sure he heard you right. But your voice echoed correctly in his head and he actually takes a step away from you, face incredulous.

"What the fuck did you just call me?" he scoffs, not sure if he was supposed to be offended or it was a compliment from you in some weird way. "The pet shop is right next door. Go get a dog there."

"Please. You know what I mean." you look at him pleadingly and he looks away. No, no, he was not gonna break first. This wasn't his business to deal with. He's done enough for people for the day. Nope.

"Again, go look for that somewhere else. Don't you have a boyfriend to help with this kinda thing?"

You roll your eyes and Scaramouche has half a mind to smack you silly. "If I did, you think I'd be going up to strangers for help?"

"So this is a regular thing, huh?" he takes a step back and you take a step towards him.

"Of course not, you expect this kinda thing to happen sometimes. But I don't want to hide away just ‘cause some people couldn't stay away and mind their own damn business," you shuffle from one foot to another. You cast a hesitant look behind you. His eyes follow.

"What are you even-" he stops. In the corner where he last saw you turn, a hooded man hovered over the bread aisle. For a shelf that only had five pieces of loaves left he was taking his time picking, so that only meant one thing. Scaramouche watched as the man glanced over once in your direction before seemingly turning back to the bread with fake focus.

"I thought I was imagining it. But he’s giving me the evil eyes," your voice is a whisper again.

That's unpleasant. Scaramouche straightened his posture and looked at you directly. If it's a scary dog you needed then so be it.

"What are you waiting for, then?" his voice was loud, not enough to be too distracting, but enough to carry over to the asshole who decided to be a creep for the day. Scaramouche kept his eyes on you. "You need anything else? I got the car running. Let's go if you're ready."

You look up at him like he was a fucking hero and Scaramouche all but does his best to not look as pompous as he felt. He sees the guy step back a little from his view, most likely thinking twice about following you when you're suddenly with company. He all but stares the fucker down until he leaves his line of sight.

Scaramouche breathes a short sigh of relief and he sees you do the same. He wanted to leave it at that, but if the guy was planning to follow you around the mall, he'd probably stick around a bit more. So fucking annoying. Not you, though. Although you were a bit annoying, you've probably been through more today than he had. He takes your wrist lightly.

"Where to next? I have family waiting outside."

You smile, relaxed and familiar. He holds your wrist, but you guide him around the store for a few other things before heading to the counter. When you leave the shop, plastic bags in hand, he motions for you to head to the parking lot and you follow albeit hesitantly, only visibly relaxing when you see a woman standing by a car who looks eerily similar to your rescuer.

"Oh? You have a friend." Scaramouche bites back the retort that almost slips past his lips. What did she mean by that? Of course he had friends. He'd never introduce them to her and her to them but he preferred keeping those two sides of his life away from each other.

"She had a bit of a problem and needed some help," she looks at you once and back to him. She gives him a knowing look but Scaramouche could swear on his grave that what she was thinking was vastly different from what was really going on.

"I see. Will your friend be joining us for dinner?" she looks at you with a soft smile and you return it. Scaramouche has half a mind to facepalm himself, he thanks what shred of patience he has left that he doesn't because you give him a glance.

"Thank you for the offer, but I should really be heading home," you turn to him fully and take the plastic bags from him. "Thanks for... helping me."

He opens his mouth but before he can say anything, you give him a knowing nod before quickly walking away. He watches you walk a few paces before he hears his mom clear her throat. He looks to her, already scowling.

"Don't tell me you're just gonna let her go like that?"

"What do you want me to do?"

Ei sighs. "At least make sure she gets a ride? If you walked her all the way over here, I can guess you wanted to give her a ride home. But that's out of the question now."

"Why are you so invested in this anyway? I just met her today."

"Oh, really? I thought you already knew each other." Ei hums as she rummages her purse for the keys. "You look like a pair. Not quite sure what kind, but definitely a pair of something. I think she’s rather cute."

He curses silently before jogging to catch up to you. He finds you standing by the bus stop. When you turn to him, you smile.

"Thanks for helping me again."

"You know I was planning on dropping you off at your place, right? Thought that was kinda clear with what I said at the grocery."

"Nah. I'd bothered you enough. Don't wanna bother your sister either." you grin at him, shuffling from foot to foot again, now with a pep in your step.

"First off, that was my mom, not my sister." you repeat the word 'mom' silently before looking at him with barely suppressed admiration, and Scaramouche barely holds himself back from groaning. "Second, it's fine. You're not scared that guy's gonna follow you home?"

"I'll be in a bus full of people. If he tries anything I'll scream my head off." you laugh. Scaramouche can hear a shred of doubt in your voice, but he doesn't say anything else. There's a pause of silence before you look at him from the corner of your eye and hum. "Y'know. I don't know how to properly thank you."

He waves you off. "Forget about it."

"How about I treat you?" you turn to him fully, like he just didn't brush you off. "I know a cafe by the train station that makes really good matcha lattes."

"What makes you think I even like matcha?" he sighs, but he thinks about it for a second. And then another second. Scaramouche blinks before he turns to you with a deadpan face. "You're just trying to take advantage of my scary dog privilege or whatever you call it."

"Maybe? Who knows?"you grin mischievously. "I'm serious about treating you to a meal, though. I owe you one. If you want you can just take the meal and forget about ever seeing me again."

Scaramouche sighs. Surely, it wouldn't hurt...?

"Alright then. When's our date?" You blink at him in surprise before laughing.

When people ask him how you two got together, he says you treated him to matcha for saving your life and you just hit it off. When they ask you to confirm, you excitedly show a picture of the two of you in the cafe of your first date. Should anyone try to mention the foam of milk from the matcha latte gathered around the top of his lips or the cat ears you had graciously edited onto the top of his head, Scaramouche is quick to silence them with a murderous look, almost the very same one he has on in the picture.

Some might think why doesn’t he just ask you to stop showing the photo to people? It’s enough for you to confirm that you got together over drinks, end of story. But as he watches and listens to you recount how you met again, the smile on your lips and the laughter that slips past and the grin as you show all the pictures - he can’t imagine saying no.

Why would he make you stop when you’re so happy?

That’s what he thinks now, as he sees the frown on your face.

He thought people already understood. He let you tell the story over and over even though it got on his nerves time and time again because it made you happy, yes, but also so people saw who they were messing with if they ever even thought of messing with you. This city was a small one - if people didn’t know him from his mother, they surely have heard of him and his friends. This city was the kind where word travelled fast if you were even in any social circle. If not for that, they would have surely seen him walking around with you with all the places you wanted to see.

He underestimated how dumb people could be.

Scaramouche rolled his eyes before frowning. He pocketed his phone and all but jogged to the park. From a distance, he could see two guys in front of the bench he was sure was where you were supposed to meet. It was the bench he and you stopped at to exchange numbers, so it became a place that meant a lot to you. When he was close, the group of guys looked at his direction, snickering, before heading to the next bench over. Finally, he has a perfect view of you, your head down, holding on to your drink and phone like a lifeline. His drink almost lay forgotten beside you.

He quickly grabbed the drink from your side and sat beside you. From the corner of his eye, he can see the group of guys stealing glances at the both of you, not even trying to hide their laughter and sneers. He’s gripping his drink almost as hard as you were.

“You’re here,” you smile at him, but as quickly as it’s on your face it drops back to a wobbly frown and you look away. “Sorry if I made you hurry, I-”

“What happened? Did they do anything to you?” his voice comes out in a rush but it’s soft, as comforting as he can muster with the situation at hand. He can feel his blood boiling, his senses on high alert.

“No, no, they were just being mean and annoying and I-” you shakily pocket your phone and hold on to his hand. He can feel you shaking and he grit his teeth.

“What did they do? What the fuck did they say?” he was gripping onto the cup so tight he would’ve been surprised that it hadn’t broken yet if he wasn’t so focused on you.

“Nothing important.” he squeezes your hand, not enough to hurt, but to make sure you know that he’s here now. You didn’t need to hide anything from him. You just need to tell him. You look up at him and purse your lips. “They just said-”

He hears laughter and immediately whips his head towards the two guys, feeling absolutely feral. The closest one sitting on the edge of the bench flinches for a second, before he meets his glare with a sneer.

“I was wondering what kind of parents would leave their little princess walking around alone like that,” the guy smirks and Scaramouche can feel you flinch under his touch. “But another kid just showed up to pick them up. Where are your parents, kiddies?”

The two guys laugh and Scaramouche can feel his teeth crack with how hard he was biting down. He stands up but you hold on to his hand.

“Just let it go. Let’s just get out of here.” you mumble to him, but the guys heard perfectly.

“Let’s just get out of here~” the other guy copies your voice, all high pitched and mocking and everything that Scaramouche knew you were very much not. “She dresses like a little princess and sounds like one. Aren’t you too old for that?”

They howl with laughter and slowly, Scaramouche feels you let go of him. He looks to you, concerned, but you meet his eyes, your face blank but he knows that look.

Go for it.

With quick strides he’s right beside their bench. They stop for a moment to look at him.

He looks at the matcha latte in his hand and sighs.

What a waste of a drink. You got it for him, too.

“What are you- ARGH!” Scaramouche shakes the cup empty of all it’s content, making sure that each of the guys’ heads had at least a bit of the matcha drink. But Scaramouche was sure he got them both - it was a large drink, after all.

“Pick on someone your own size, you lil’-” the man closest to him goes to stand, but just as he does, Scaramouche raises his own leg and drives a kick right on his knees.

*CRACK*

The man screams in pain, forced to his knees and tending to his newly acquired wound. The other guy stands to try and help, but his form quickly falters as Scaramouche takes one step towards him, eyes blazing. The man doesn’t move, too frightened, as Scaramouche leans down to the man on the ground.

“There you go. Now we’re the same height.”

Scaramouche feels a pull on the back of his shirt and he’s ready to throw his arm back to punch when he sees you. He lets you pull him and you make a break for it as he hears the man crying in pain behind him.

Trees turn to buildings around you both as you leave the park and head to the city center, stopping only when you’re sure the coast is clear. You both take in large breaths of air after running for so long, but even the silence does nothing to make him realize the gravity of what just happened. That’s not the case for you, though.

“Oh, God, I didn’t think you’d do that. The drink, yeah, but...” you say between breaths. You take a shaky laugh and rub the back of your neck. “Was the kick really necessary, though?”

Was that necessary? Scaramouche knew the answer for himself. He walks closer to you.

Why would he let anyone destroy whatever you two had going on? You came as a pair.

"Scara, what are you-" he stops in his tracks and looks you in the eyes. There's a pause before he lifts his hand and flicks your forehead.

"Talk smack, get whacked."

"I didn't even say anything! And why are you hitting me?!"

There’s a pause as he runs his teeth over his lower lip.

“Hey… you.”

“Wow, I thought by now you knew my name,” you sneer at him. “You telling me you still don’t know it?”

He inhales before he says your name softly. You gape at him, suddenly aware of how serious he’s gotten. “You’re happy with… yourself, right…?”

“Of course I am. That’s not even worth asking about,” there’s a doubtful look on your face, but not because of your answer. Your apprehension stems from where this conversation was going.

“Keep being happy, then.” Scaramouche rubs the knuckles of your hand with his thumb before pressing a kiss to your palm. He smirks at you. “If anyone else says otherwise, a drink over their head and broken kneecaps are the least of their concerns.”

“Now, come on,” he doesn’t let go of your hand and you make no mention of it. “We still gotta stop by Nahida’s, right?”

＝＝✿＝＝｜✧••❀••✧｜＝＝✿＝＝

❀BONUS❀

“Your mom’s gonna kill us when she finds out what you did.”

“Nah. She’d be fine with it.” Scaramouche scoffs.

“Find out what?” Ei appears by the kitchen doorway and looks at you both expectantly. You turn to Scaramouche, eyes wide with fear, but he doesn’t flinch or even stop chopping the melon.

“I poured a drink over some guy who said Matcha was acting too much like a kid,” Scaramouche answers easily, passing you a melon slice. “Also might have broken their knee, but we didn’t get to see.”

“I’m really sorry, Ms. Ei-”

“That’s it?” Ei leans on the kitchen counter and to your surprise, looks at Scaramouche with disappointment. “You should’ve broken a bone or two more.”

You blink as they continue talking about how best to have handled the situation; all their solutions involved hurting someone.

Well, you guess Scaramouche must have had to got it from someone in the family.

✨ Masterlist ✨

Taglist: 💛@wonpielle 💜@shikanosn

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine and belong to their respective creators. Their portrayal is merely my own interpretation of them and may not be accurate to their intended characterization. I stake no claim to the original works, only to the ideas and plot of the fictitious stories I’ve written them into.

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact scaramouche x reader #scaramouche x reader #wanderer x reader #genshin impact modern au #scaramouche modern au #genshin impact reader insert #scaramouche x reader fluff #scaramouche fluff #genshin impact x reader fluff

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honestlydarkprincess · 19 days

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welcome to the club

buck & hen || rated: g || wc: 908 || read on ao3

Buck rang the doorbell to Hen’s house and took a deep breath. He was nervous but since coming out to Maddie and Bobby, he wasn’t as anxious as he might have been. He was ready, he was going to tell Hen today.

Hen opened the door with a look of surprise. “Buck?”

“Hey, Hen, uh, can I come in?” Buck asked, biting his lip as he played with his hands.

“Yeah, of course,” Hen said, shaking off the surprise and stepping to the side, gesturing for him to come in. “If this is you wanting to get day drunk again I’m afraid I’m going to have to take a rain check, I have to pick up Denny in two hours.”

“No,” Buck laughed, proud that his voice was only a little bit shaky. “That’s not it at all.”

“Okay, then what brings you to my door?” Hen asked, taking a seat at the table and nodding for Buck to do to the same.

Buck swallowed, taking a seat and folding his hands on top of the table. “I came to tell you something. It’s something I only recently figured out and I’m telling you guys one by one which feels like the right move but also it’s been terrifying as fuck. So far I’ve only told Maddie and Bobby and that’s because Maddie’s my older sister and Bobby asked me about it, y’know?” He rambled, unable to stop now that he had started. “And I know it would be ridiculous to think that you would think differently of me because,” Buck gestured vaguely. “but I don’t know, you’re like a sister to me and this is really scary and—”

“Okay, okay, slow down there, Buck,” Hen interrupted, putting a calming hand on his. Buck let out a shuddering breath. “Now, I think I know where you’re going with this, but take a deep breath and continue.”

Buck followed her instructions, letting her steady presence anchor him. He felt his heart slow down and he closed his eyes, inhaling and exhaling. “I’m— I think— well, actually, I know—“ He cut himself off, huffing when the words refused to tumble out. “I’m bisexual.” He said finally, forcing the words from his lips.

He stared at his hands as he waited for her answer.

“I was wondering when you were going to figure it out.”

Buck’s head shot up and he stared at Hen in shock. “You knew?”

Hen shrugged slightly. “I’ve always had a feeling but I was never one hundred percent sure.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked.

Hen laughed quietly. “Buck, I can’t tell you how to feel or how to identify. Sure, I had my suspicions but they were always just that.”

“Yeah, but I might have figured it out earlier if you had told me,” Buck grumbled, pouting slightly.

Hen gave him an amused look. “This was always something you were going to have to figure out on your own, Buckaroo. And now that you have, I can say welcome to the club.”

Buck smiled widely, his cheeks hurting. “Y-Yeah, I guess I am part of the club.”

“Now,” Hen gave him a mock serious look. “Who is it?”

“What do you mean?” Buck asked even though his cheeks flushed. He had a feeling he knew what she was asking.

“Who made you realize it?”

“Uh,” Buck briefly considered lying and claiming it just came to him but if he was being honest with people he might as well go all the way. “It was Tommy. He kissed me.”

“Work Tommy? Tommy Kinard?” Hen asked, surprised. The surprise only lasted a few seconds before she said, “Yeah, you know what, that makes sense.”

Buck laughed, his cheeks bright pink. “Yeah, he, uh. He’s something else.”

“Well, thanks for telling me, Buck. I know that it’s not an easy thing to do,” She reached over and squeezed his hand again. “I’m very proud of you.”

“People keep saying that,” Buck said, ducking his head to hide the tears that sprang up in his eyes. “I don’t know if I deserve it.”

“It’s not an easy thing to do, Buck. Being open and honest about yourself is terrifying, even when it’s people you know who will support you,” Hen said gently. “So yeah, I’m proud of you and you should be proud of yourself.”

Buck felt his throat go tight as he got choked up. “Thanks, Hen,” He whispered. “That means a lot.”

“Anytime, Buckaroo. Anytime.”

And when Buck got to work the next time they had a shift together, Hen came up to him, hiding something behind her back. “I have a present for you.” She handed him a little bag and after giving her a curious look, Buck looked inside.

In the bag was a rolled up bisexual pride flag, a pin, and a fridge magnet. Immediately Buck felt like he couldn’t breathe, emotion choking him up. “Hen…”

She shrugged. “It’s not much but I know how much it meant to me when I got my first flag, so I hoped that I could be the one to give it to you.”

Buck tugged her into a bear hug, his throat too tight to get the words out, so he hoped that she felt just how grateful he was through their hug. God, he loved his family. Hen hugged back just as tightly and Buck knew that she had gotten the message loud and clear.

#the coming out series #jess.fics #jess.writes #hen wilson #evan buckley #evan buck buckley #911 #911 abc #911 on abc #911 spoilers #911 spec #911 speculation #bi buck #bisexual buck

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intrulogical · 4 months

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🍊: The Semantics of The Orange Side

Explaining his function, understanding his role in the narrative, and debunking/dissecting common notions about the Orange Side.

To be honest, this essay was inevitable. I've had thoughts about Orange brewing since 2020, but only recently has it developed into something more concrete. For the longest time, most meta surrounding Orange began with theories about his role as a side, then extended towards narrative and side mechanics later on. I, for one, have been a victim of this pattern.

Then, I realized that asking who Orange is is a terrible opener for theories.

There are many important questions glossed over if we start that way. For example, what is Orange's role in the overarching theme of combating black-and-white thinking? What does it mean for Orange to be a side? Who is he in the context of the Dark Sides? There are many crucial things to consider when it comes to predicting who Orange is, and I feel like concrete theories can only be made if we can establish the semantics of how Orange works.

This essay definitely won't be perfect— this is literally my second draft— but I will try my best making it in a way that flows, somehow. Some sections will discuss general ideas I have, some will try to dissec popular preconceived notions to reorient our logic surrounding Orange. As always, I'm open to discussion! My words aren't gospel.

Important notes: All mentions of Thomas refer to him as a character. Moreover, I acknowledge that Remus is a flawed depiction of intrusive thoughts. Technically, he acts more of a mix of intrusive thoughts, forbidden creativity, and impulsive thoughts. Because of this, when I talk about Remus in the context of his role, please be assured that I am talking about all his functions at once, not just intrusive thoughts.

(Full essay under the cut! I worked hard on this, so I'd definitely appreciate the read. <3)

i. Orange as a Dark Side

The ways fans have characterized and defined Orange has always seemed to be rooted in their perception of what being a “Dark” Side is. That is— they are edgy, and somewhat suppressed. They are more “morally questionable” compared to the rest. More fics would even go as far as depicting Orange as morally black, in that he has no role in the narrative other than being a stirring force of conflict; a villain that needs to be defeated.

It is unfortunate to see such a surface level perspective on who the “Dark” Sides are and what they mean as an oppositional force to the “Light” Sides.

My stance on the “Dark” and “Light” sides has always been the same (if you read my past essays, you'll know). Like what Logan said in CLBG, the labels are arbitrary because no side can be argued to be “good” or “bad”. Although, it would be a complete lie for me to say there's no distinction. Rather, Thomas’ black-and-white thinking literally created one. But the distinction does not lie within the sides’ morals, rather it lies in how big their influence is on Thomas. Because the “Light” Sides are welcomed, Thomas will entertain their contributions more than the sides Thomas considers as “bad” or “taboo”.

In my opinion, Orange being morally black makes no sense in a series that is a.) thematically focused on dismantling black-and-white thinking, and b.) a man vs. self conflict. The villain is the problem of Thomas not being able to cope with his mental struggles properly. It would be odd to blame a portion of his brain as the evil of all evils. Although, I'd like to clarify that while Orange most likely wouldn't be morally black, it wouldn't be a surprise to me if he is just as dubious and mischievous as the other “Dark” Sides. After all, if they are the most suppressed sides, they would have to stick to unconventional tactics (aka looking scary) to get Thomas’ attention.

I'll explain more later when I get into what I think Orange actually does as a side. For now, I want to focus on Orange in the context of the “Dark” Sides, because I genuinely think it's an overlooked idea! While nothing is explicitly confirmed, the “Dark” Sides are implied to know something the other characters and we, the audience, don't know about.

Janus and Remus share this sense of meticulousness. They always feel like they're scheming something. Janus, for example, took his time from CLBG to SVS.R to successfully impart to Thomas that acting out of self-interest isn't the worst thing in the world, especially if your mental health is crumbling. Remus is even in on this plan, although his motivations for assisting Janus aren’t actually explicitly expressed yet. Even if Remus wanted to challenge Logan's self-restraint in WTIT to prove how much it was harming Thomas’ long-term mental health, we still don't know if Remus is doing it out of care for Thomas, or just… ‘cus. Either way, it's important to know that whatever Remus is doing seems to point to the same direction Janus is going, which is to break Thomas’ black-and-white thinking.

Assuming Orange is another “Dark” Side, it feels crucial to understand who Orange is in the context of this undisclosed plan. More than anything, because the “Dark” Sides want to be heard, it would make sense if they unionize to achieve that goal together. If they dismantle Thomas’ horrid perception of them, then all three of them would benefit. Thus, it would make no sense for Orange, if he were not morally black, to act solely out of individual interest. Yes, the “Dark” Sides seem to be introducing themselves one by one, but I feel like that's because a.) narratively, it's to pace, b.) it would scare Thomas for three strangers to pop up to him only for them to be shunned as a collective by the “Light” Sides, and c.) Janus and Remus seem to be performing specific roles in this overarching plan, so while they work separately, it's mostly for the same cause.

So, what does that mean, exactly? Like I said, the “Dark” Sides have an overall goal of being heard, strengthening Thomas’ mental wellbeing, and breaking his black-and-white thinking. If my theory is correct in assuming each “Dark” Side has a specific role for this plan, then pinpointing Janus and Remus’ roles may help us factor out Orange's role.

Here's what I deduced: Janus is there as some kind of soft launch, to set the principle. Janus mirrors Patton in that sense, although in the opposite direction. He breaks apart Thomas’ preconceived notions of the world and bandages it with better, more nuanced foundations. On the other hand, Remus somewhat acts like an alarm clock. While not all his contributions are worthwhile, his mere presence is a reminder that something has to be done. In the series, it's to cater to his deteriorating mental health. He checks if the principles Janus provides aren't being followed, and makes a good fucking clamor about it if it doesn't.

Orange, I'd argue, serves as a means for Thomas to externalize these principles. It would make sense that the last thing Thomas would need to do is to put everything into action. Janus points out how one can be disenfranchised, Remus points out when he is being disenfranchised, and Orange ensures Thomas can express his discomfort when he is disenfranchised. Makes sense, right?

Speaking of externalization.

ii. Personal and Narrative Purpose

If you’re a fan that pre-dates the release of WTIT, you're well-acquainted with the idea that Orange represents Rage or Wrath. This theory came about in cahoots with an old notion that each “Dark” Side needs to have a “Light” Side counterpart, especially if you share complementary colors. Thus, many people assumed that Orange is Logan’s foil. Consequently, most interpretations of Orange depict him as emotion-centric, specifically Rage, as that’s what most people assume is an oppositional force against logic. Moreover, because a portion of Logan’s arc revolves around accepting one’s emotions, it would make sense if Orange, as an emotion-centric side, would be part of that. We’ve gotten two hints from the series itself that confirms this: 1.) a fight sequence in SVS.R showing “Blinding Rage” as one of Thomas’ attacking options, and 2.) the infamous orange eyes in WTIT that appeared when both Thomas and Logan felt angry simultaneously.

What’s funny is, if you really think about it, we literally only have two pieces of evidence that point to this widely accepted fan theory. Although, unlike the previous section, I’m more inclined to actually believe these theories because it… does make sense! Especially narrative-wise. At the moment, miscommunication amongst the sides are at an all-time high. This is mostly because each side refuses to express their thoughts, especially since they’re at the midst of a complete paradigm shift in terms of morality and principles. Everything’s just a little too fragile, and it does not help that Thomas’ mental health is also at the brink. After SVS.R, the sides have acknowledged Thomas is on edge, but they’re still doing nothing concrete to actually fix it.

WTIT is my favorite episode of the series because it encapsulates the entire conflict so well. While Logan isn’t perfect, much of the useful suggestions he provided since DWIT never last past the moment he suggested them. Did Thomas ever see a therapist? Not really. Did Thomas find someone to talk about his issues with? Doesn't seem like it. Is Thomas taking his time with his mental health recovery? Nope. More than anything, the “Light” Sides and Thomas are very reactionary towards their problems. It’s even worse when you consider that Thomas is opting to pursue a relationship in the middle of this mess. WTIT showing us Thomas getting irrationally angry at Nico for not replying to his texts is… an interesting Chekhov’s Gun for future episodes, lemme tell you that.

Now, why am I relaying all this? It’s mostly to prove that something, or someone, needs to snap. There are grievances between the sides and Thomas that they are consciously suppressing that need out. Roman, Logan, and Thomas, specifically, need some sort of outlet for their frustrations— a way to justify them, in a sense. Logan’s eyes glowing orange while he snapped at Remus speaks so loudly of what Orange may offer. Externalization, justice, “cathartic release,” as my friend Orb (@orbmanson7) put it. Presently, Orange as an externalizing force is needed so they can actually do something about this damn issue!

And if not, I also see Orange’s role similarly to Remus’. As I’ve explained earlier, Remus’ presence acts as an alarm clock for Thomas to be aware of his deteriorating mental health. If Orange isn’t there to assist in an all-encompassing externalization of a side or Thomas’ deepest grievances, the mere presence of Orange as an emotional force can act as another kind of alarm clock. What I mean is, if we’re feeling mentally low, for example, we don’t need to express our grievances in the most eloquent way possible. Sometimes we just need to get angry. To cry, to shout nonsense. And that alone would be enough to prove that we need help. We need to do something about this.

To summarize, I think most depictions connecting Orange to emotional externalization are not off. There’s a lot of objectivity surrounding it, both when it comes to the narrative and his semantics as a side. We need a driving force that can topple the sides and Thomas over the edge to fully process the depth of Thomas’ mental health issues.

But, how does he, a supposedly, emotion-centric side, differ from Patton?

iii. Orange’s True Identity

Now that we laid our foundations, I think it would be a good time to entertain the question of: well, who is Orange?

Truth is, I have my own guess on what I believe Orange to be, but I cannot say my opinion is conclusive. My theories on Orange literally change every two months. So what I'll do, I suppose, is first, explain what makes a side a side. Then, I'll explain my own current predictions about Orange. Lastly, I'll list some popular fan theories I've heard about Orange and give you my thoughts.

a. What is a Side?

First— what constitutes a side? To me, there is no real basis in the conception of a side. Like what my friend Orb once explained to me, the interactions between sides are mental processes personified. This doesn't mean we should simply view the sides as metaphors, by the way. They're a hundred percent characters in their own right. But what I mean by “process personified” is that if we view one of Thomas' conflicts on its own— as in, without the sides— can we imagine the mental processes he's undergoing? To make it clearer, let's use an example. In WTIT, we see Remus and Logan battle out on who gets to influence Thomas more. If we saw this without the sides, we can think of it like— imagine you're having a bad mental health day. You wanted to do a list of chores but your mind is in the gutters right now. You feel guilty because of your demotivation. You try doing what you planned, but you still suck at it, and now you're spiraling, thinking about every insecurity you have, but you're also trying to combat that by rationalizing it.

I'm not gonna say that this definition solves who Orange truly is, but it does help when it comes to understanding how the sides work. Another characteristic of a side would be their multifacetedness. No side embodies one thing alone. They can have roles that are adjacent to each other, but not the same thing. For example, Roman embodies both the ego and creativity. Not the same thing, but it works in tandem in Thomas’ context. Same goes for Remus with intrusive thoughts and dark creativity. It is important to entertain the idea that Orange can encompass more than one role.

The last thing to consider would be the technical difference between a “Light” Side and a “Dark” Side. The division was created for Thomas to compartmentalize and suppress sides of himself that his Catholic upbringing taught him to believe is bad. If we assume Orange is a “Dark” Side, he must be embodying something typically thought of as taboo.

b. Who is Orange?

This brings us to our earlier question of, how does Patton differ from Orange if they both embody emotions? In DWIT, Logan confirms Remus was born from the categorization of certain thoughts as good or bad. I think it wouldn't be farfetched to suggest the same happened to Orange if he did embody emotions at a certain capacity. One of the biggest arguments I hear against this suggestion would be, if Patton already represents Thomas’ emotions, why do we need another side who does? The answer, again, lies in the themes of black-and-white thinking and compartmentalization. If Remus embodies the thought of committing a “sin”, Orange could possibly embody the actual emotions of wanting to do so. Anger is merely one possibility in Orange's roster of emotions. There are other emotions as well deemed “sinful” by Catholicism— pride, jealousy, hatred, greed, grief, etc. It would make sense that Patton would try omitting these out of himself when he was younger because he viewed them lowly.

So, what is my actual guess on who Orange is meant to embody? Well, I mean, I think my stance is pretty clear from the past 2500 words written literally before this. Simply put, if Remus is meant to embody forbidden thoughts, then Orange embodies forbidden emotions. Anger is merely one of many. He aids both Thomas and the other sides in externalizing strong emotions that seep past their efforts of suppression.

This is, of course, under the assumption that Orange is his own separate entity. I'm more inclined to believe this because Virgil confirms in CLBG that Janus has “Dark” Side friends (as in, plural). It also just feels more balanced this way if we consider the forbidden thoughts vis-a-vis forbidden emotions parallel to be true.

c. How could Logan be Orange?

But, of course, I've also considered the possibility of Logan being Orange. It's not my theory of choice but as someone who was balls deep in this theory a few months ago, there's definitely some merit to it. Here's the link to the post if you want to read my theory in full. It's pretty lengthy, but to summarize: This theory operates under the assumption that Thomas’ suppression of certain sides (ie. making them a “Dark” Side) makes them develop an additional role— the role Thomas perceives them as.

To explain better, let's use Remus as an example. Logan explained that, originally, Remus separated from Roman as Dark Creativity. Because Thomas refuses to entertain any creative thought he deemed bad, any suggestion provided by Remus was immediately labeled as intrusive. Thus, he became intrusive thoughts via Thomas’ low perception of him. Same goes for Janus, but to a lesser degree. As a side, he mostly acts out of the interest of Thomas, somewhat like self-preservation. But, because Catholic upbringing teaches that selfishness equates to evil, Thomas perceives Janus’ role of keeping things hidden as deceitful.

Thus, if Logan is Orange, then that means Logan’s role as logic is warping due to Thomas’ low perception of him. It’s no secret that Thomas views Logan as a “strict” side. In this scenario, I wouldn’t exactly say his additional role has something to do with externalization. Moreso, it has to do something with assertion or strict discipline. Think of an authoritative figure, like a teacher. Usually, when an authoritative teacher isn’t being respected in a class, they resort to meaner tactics like passive aggression, manipulation, etc. to impose their power. Logan doesn’t really transform into anything opposite to who he is as Logic. Rather, he has an additional role that coincides with Thomas’ perverted perception of logic. I’m not actually sure what this role is, but if I were to guess, it has something to do with restriction, discipline, or conformity.

Narratively, Logan becoming a “Dark” Side makes sense when you realize that his entire character arc is about him losing his sense of self-assertion. I made an essay last year that explores this if you want something to read later. To explain, WDWGOOBITM establishes how it’s important for Thomas to balance his practicality (needs) and aspirational desires (wants) for him to function as a human being. At the same time, we get LNTAO where Logan realizes that he failed to contribute to the discussion as usefully as the other sides. This creates a scenario where Logan concedes a lot of the decision-making to Patton and Roman’s hands. The result: Logan’s presence is minimized. Even in the episodes where he “saves the day” (DWIT and the Frozen episode), Thomas refused to consider his suggestions until the latter halves of the episodes. WTIT emphasizes this even more when we see Thomas prioritize his date with Nico to keep himself happy instead of focusing on the chores he promised to do. Even if we don’t know if Roman had anything to do with this, it’s obvious Thomas is naturally more inclined to do things Patton and Roman would prefer than something Logan does.

Thus, it makes sense that Logan becomes a “Dark” Side. But, and this is an important but, I don’t really agree with depictions of Logan suspending his role as logic to become a “Dark” Side. Logic is such an integral part of who we are as people, that even if you’re an intuition-focused person, you’d still have logical facilities in your head that connect one thing to another. Basic knowledge and all that. I can only see Logan be a completely new role if someone takes his place as Logic. Personally, I don’t like that idea, but you can make your own takeaways on this.

How “Dark” Sides are conceived would still be a mystery. The closest we’ve gotten to an explanation is Remus’ origin story, where he and Roman originally started as one creativity until they separated. In this sense, becoming a “Dark” Side didn’t really uproot Remus’ original role. He just changed a little. I’d like to assume the same for Logan, because if he is literally born as Thomas’ Logic, then he as a “Dark” Side would still have similar roles, just with minor changes.

d. Other Theories

Now with the main theories out of the way, let me speedrun through other theories I’ve heard and give my thoughts on it:

Procrastination: I feel like this is too surface-level for a side. As in, hHow would Procrastination justify itself to Thomas as a side that wants to help? Yes, Procrastination would be a good foil to Thomas, but Thomas’ inability to work doesn’t stem from Procrastination. It stems from bad solutions to his mental health crisis. Anyway, too cheap.

ADHD: This feels like… it’s prone to problematic territory. For real, ADHD is so multifaceted in itself, and is literally a disability? I think it makes more sense to have ADHD traits sprinkled amongst the sides rather than one character representing it as a whole. To make it its own guy is like suggesting the other six sides are divorced from Thomas’ ADHD characteristics, which feels wrong to me.

Hatred and any other suggestion that relates to “taboo” emotions: See my argument on Orange encapsulating forbidden emotions as a whole instead of Rage/Wrath on its own.

Justice: I actually liked this idea and sort of incorporated it with my idea of Orange as a means of externalization! To enact justice means to externalize your deepest desires— cathartic release.

Regret: See: the last two points, since it’s very similar.

Repression: Your heart’s in the right place, but most theories that subscribe to this literally just describe Janus. Keeping things secret because you think it’s unbeneficial? That’s one of Janus’ roles.

Insecurity: That is literally Remus’ role. While intrusive thoughts shouldn’t be viewed as meritable, intrusive thoughts base itself on a person’s sensitivities and insecurities. I also have an essay detailing how Remus is incredibly perceptive about everyone’s insecurities here.

That's about all the other theories I can recall, but if anyone else has other suggestions, send it to my inbox and I'll give you my thoughts.

Now that we understand Orange's fundamentals and who he is as a side, the question to ask next is what is he capable of as a side?

iv. Powers and Influences

Now we get to the part where I am! The most unsure about! As of the time I'm writing this, I literally just had a conversation with Orb trying to understand how Orange “possesses” Thomas and the sides, and nothing conclusive came out of it. Even if we are shown one instance of how Orange influences the others (ie. Logan's orange eyes), we actually do not know how that works at all.

I suppose we can start by asking ourselves how Orange embodies forbidden emotions. I see his insistence for Thomas to perform a certain emotion similar to how Patton would do it. It's impulsive, reactionary. They undergo a situation, then they make Thomas feel an emotion they deem apt for that situation. The only reason Orange isn't utilized as much as Patton is because, of course, Patton is who Thomas is more familiar with. I'd also like to argue that the emotions Orange would possibly encapsulate aren't ones that are constantly expressed. Most of the time, we are in a state of happiness or contentment, emotions covered by Patton. If not, we experience sadness, another common emotion covered by Patton. I would imagine Orange's roster of emotions are only experienced rarely, or if put in a continuous dire situation. Immense anger, for example, would pop up if you feel continuously disenfranchised by something. See: Thomas’ mental health crisis.

Ergo, Orange allows Thomas to feel “taboo” emotions when the situation calls for it. Pretty straightforward. But we're not done yet, because we have to consider what it means that Orange also assists other sides in externalizing their own emotions. We can't use the same argument we gave to Thomas because the sides… aren't each others’ sides. They're Thomas’. If Orange assists in the externalization of the other sides’ repressed emotions, then it has to work differently.

A widely accepted theory or headcanon I see in the fandom is that Orange “possessed” Logan to make him get angry. Or, Logan made a deal with Orange, and now he has angry spurts he doesn't understand. While I appreciate the efforts to make juicy angst, I'm not fond of the idea that these theories basically imply that Logan's anger in WTIT was not his own. In reality, it was. Logan suppressed his frustrations about everyone ignoring his suggestions, and now he snaps. Making it seem like he can't achieve these emotions on his own volition implies he has no frustrations about his predicament to begin with.

The real question is, then, why did Logan's eyes glow orange if his emotions at that moment were genuine? Well, like other segments of this essay, it's hard for me to say something conclusively. We literally have nothing else to work on, guys, pardon me if I can't be a hundred percent certain on my assertions. But if I were to guess, I'm inclined to believe that Orange cannot make the sides feel emotions that they don't already have. Rather, he's responsible for enhancing it. In Logan's situation, for example, his frustration is completely his own. But when you submit to something like, let's say, blinding rage, sometimes you lose your sense of control and simply act. In this case, Orange possibly assists the flow of emotions the side in question would be experiencing.

I'll admit though, I literally have no clue how Orange does that, how he assists the other sides to feel their repressed emotions better. Again, we are working with practically nothing here. Although, one thing we can entertain is the idea that Orange has something to do with a side's state of being. Just like how Janus causes the sides to cover their mouths when expressing a lie, the sides’ eyes could possibly glow orange just because they're feeling an intense, “taboo” emotion. If you don't want to imagine Orange as its own side, you can also factor in the popular fan theory that Orange is simply a state of being the sides experience, no additional side required. Either way, while we cannot dive deep on the semantics of the glowy eyes thing, we can at least confirm there is a link between a side externalizing repressed or “taboo” emotions and Orange himself.

v. Relationships With The Sides (Especially Logan)

Another thing I wanted to discuss is the relationships Orange shares with the other sides. The most accepted depiction of Orange shows him distanced from the “Dark” Sides, while also having a crude fascination with Logan. We've discussed enough of how I view Orange in the context of the “Dark” Sides, so I'd like to focus more on what it means for Orange to assimilate with the “Light” Sides, especially Logan.

Because Logan's first to be seen with these orange eyes, many are quick to assume this is an isolated case. Fair enough— we don't have other examples to compare this with. At the same time, I think a lot of people aren't considering the idea that, if we go by the assumption that Orange is connected to states of being, then any other side can also experience the orange eyes. I won't even be surprised if it happens to Roman in this coming season finale.

But is the much entertained idea of Logan being specifically targeted by Orange unfounded? I would say no, not necessarily. The “Dark” Sides and Logan have always had an interesting relationship. Logan in particular is shown to be the side most unbothered their presence. Again, he's the side who argued that no side can actually be categorized as “good” or “bad”. He's the most sympathetic to the “Dark” Sides, but also… isn’t.

There's an explainable contradiction here. Even if Logan is nicer to the “Dark” Sides compared to the others, he also has the reputation of being able to easily and successfully shut down their suggestions. He completely opposed Janus’ side in SVS out of Thomas’ interest. He shut down Remus not once, but twice, to protect Thomas. But that's the thing— he does not shut down the “Dark” Sides’ contributions because he disagrees with them. Moreso, he does it because he thinks that's what Thomas’ wants. For example, he admitted in SVS that even if he wanted Thomas to attend the callback, he still preferred if Thomas attended the wedding instead because he thought that was what Thomas would have wanted.

And, well, we saw how Janus responded to Logan's decision— he was confused. It's like he had trust Logan would vouch for his side. Let's remember the main goal of the “Dark” Sides: to be respected, to break Thomas’ black-and-white thinking, and to get him out of his mental slump. This goal can only be achieved if they restore the balance of want and need lost partially due to Logan's diminishing self-assertion. They know Logan can do something if he lets himself loose. That's why Remus and Janus teased him in the Secret Santa gift exchange about wanting to express his frustrations. That's why, after Logan's outburst in WTIT, Remus says, “Gee, Logan, now you're speaking my language.”

They want Logan in on their plan. For that to begin, they need to make Logan in tune with his own emotional wants and needs, to make him more assertive. Thus, Orange would have to step in. There is merit when fans joke about the “Dark” Sides wanting Logan to go apeshit— it's because it's true. It's because it benefits them.

I can only provide things to consider when it comes to the other sides:

With Patton, think of the point I made earlier about Orange being “bad” emotions divorced from Patton, in a similar way Remus and Roman were created. The main difference between them would be that Patton has more faculty over principles, since Janus has that covered for the “Dark” Sides. While Patton, influenced by Catholic morality, thinks emotions and morals are intertwined, it would make sense for the more cynical sides to view them as separate.

Roman, as aforementioned, may also be susceptible to Orange's influence as the other side tends to hide his emotions from the others. With how the narrative is building up, I won't be surprised if Roman's frustrations with the whole debacle about morals heightens in the finale, especially if something Interesting happens between Thomas and Nico. You can't use Nico as a distraction forever, Thomas. Remember Thomas’ anger at Nico not responding to his messages, remember Chekhov's Gun.

Virgil is an interesting case because he would be more familiar with Orange compared to the others. That begs the question of, is he aware of the “Dark” Sides current goals and plans? My idea is, yes, but only to a certain extent. This can go down many paths. There's the possibility that Virgil was the first part of the plan, but accidentally grew closer with the “Light” Sides before he fully completed it. This explains why he hasn't disclosed the plans to the others, especially since it may incriminate him as someone who was part of that plan. There's the possibility that he knows nothing of the plan, but is familiar with the “Dark” Sides’ antics. Thus, he can't do much but stay suspicious of the sides. Either way, we still don't know enough to conclude how much Virgil knows, but I doubt he would get along with Orange.

I pondered about Janus a little because, if Orange is meant to embody externalization in some form, what does that mean for him, the embodiment of self-preservation and secrecy? I don't have the answer, but while we know the “Dark” Sides have to work with each other, we don't actually know how close Janus and Remus genuinely are with Orange. To be fair, Janus and Remus are complete opposites and they get along fine. I'd definitely prefer it if all of the “Dark” Sides were actually close because it creates such a perfect juxtaposition to the “Light” Sides’ crumbling family.

I also thought Orange and Remus would make interesting parallels as two forbidden versions of feeling and thinking respectfully. Like I said earlier, Remus can only suggest, but he never actually embodies the emotions of wanting to do taboo things. Orange, however, could. No other points except for the ones I mentioned about the “Dark” Sides in the previous bullet.

vi. Long-Term Presence

Originally, this essay would end here and already be posted. I even went through at least half of it for beta reading. Then, Orb started a discussion where they asked what I thought Orange's purpose was, especially since most theories (even the one you're reading right now) are more centered on Orange in the context of the current conflict. There was actually a part I wanted to write during the second segment where I disclosed what I thought Orange would contribute in the grander scheme of things, but I omitted it because it felt too out of place.

I replied to Orb what I was going to write; I thought that Orange was going to be the final push for Thomas to go to therapy, and make Thomas stand his ground more instead of asking the sides for advice every time he has an issue. I've always thought this, especially therapy, was one of the ways the series would end as a whole, because it means Thomas would stop talking to his sides. Or at least, in the way we see him do it in the show. That sounds a bit cynical, I know. Why would I suggest that Sanders Sides end by Thomas cutting ties with the sides?

Well, I'm not. Not entirely. I'm not advocating Thomas does. What I mean is, an underlying conflict to the current conflicts we have now is how Thomas internalizes his problems. This is literally how the series functions. Thomas has a problem, then consults himself about it via the sides. Even c!Joan mentions it in CLBG. This issue of the problem aversion Thomas has would be fine in the former parts of the series, as the things he consulted the sides about were small. But as the series progresses, we're facing issues that call for an entire paradigm shift in morality. Of Thomas putting himself and his friends in the infamous Trolley Problem. Of Thomas facing horrible intrusive thoughts he opts to combat alone.

I once called Sanders Sides a psychological horror because we see how a normal dude's mental health crumbles as he deals with life-changing situations alone. To find a solution for this main, underlying conflict means the show has to end— internalization IS the series’ foundation!

And so Orb suggested the most batshit idea— what if Orange was Thomas’ foil? Not in a sense that confirms the Opposite Sides theory. Rather, Orange, if his role is externalization, is literally the antithesis of how the sides work. As Orb put it, Orange is there to “completely wreck the format”, making Thomas realize that consulting the sides for help has its limits. He has to literally go out and touch grass, talk to his friends about his moral dilemmas, consult a damn therapist. That is what I think Orange's true purpose as a side is.

vii. Closing Statements

In the end, I can't say that everything I've stated in this essay is pure fact, but this is the most educated guess I can give considering what we're given and what we can expect to happen in canon. While most theories I've seen easily pinpoint different issues the sides and Thomas are facing in the series, these theories would then guess that Orange would be the cause of these issues. That's where theories like Procrastination, Repression, Regret, etc. come from. More than anything, I want you to see that Orange acts in response to these issues rather than in tandem with it.

The best advice I can give you when theorizing about Orange is: ask yourself what needs to be seen in the series. Remember, Sanders Sides is a narrative. Episodes will continue to happen past Orange's inevitable reveal. Think of Orange in this context, as his own character with motivations and wants for Thomas. Only then you can make educated guesses about him.

Anyway, thank you for reading my incredibly extensive essay on Orange! Again, my words are not gospel, so if you want to discuss anything further, add onto this post or send me an ask! Please read this post though before you send me anything. And If you enjoyed this, PLEASE reblog, I'd definitely appreciate it! If you want to read more stuff from me, here's a carrd masterlist of Sanders Sides meta I've done. Happy reading!

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #orange sanders #orange side #sanders sides meta #logan sanders #janus sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders

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intheclearyetgood-tv · 7 months

Text

A Way In

Triggers: not much, just reader being stabbed once but nothing graphical; making out (once); paparazzi at the end

Pairing: Taylor Swift X Singer!Female!Reader

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Being a singer-songwriter has always been one of your biggest dreams… and let’s be honest here, you never had many chances of making that dream come true. You were a dreamer… a huge one to say the least, and considering that you lived in Nashville - the city that according to people, makes everyone’s dreams come true - you should have been perfectly fine… buuut no, no can do.

You worked at Bluebird Cafe, yes, the place were Taylor Swift was discovered. Not that you’d ever met her. You were a huge fan of hers, and even if you were like 7 years younger than her and had lived in Nashville your whole life, you never met her, you never had such luck… and this lack of luck (sorry for the play on words) always persisted in your whole life.

As I was saying, you worked at The Bluebird Cafe, as a waitress. You were close with the owner of the shop, who let you give a small performance once a week for the night openings, mostly on Friday or Saturday nights, which was very convenient, considering those were the days when the cafe was most busy.

But were you ever lucky enough to meet some producers or some record label owner? Nah, that would require too much luck, you didn’t have it.

On a busy Saturday night like always, every table at the cafe had been served so you made your way up to the small stage, being comfortable about it as you had done it a thousand of times already. You sat on the stool and took the guitar, fixing the microphone to your height as you began speaking.

“Hey everyone! How’s your night going?” You started, and some of the usual clients replied happily, making you smile. “Well it’s nice to hear that you’re all doing well! Tonight I’ll be playing some original songs written and composed by me, and after that, I’m up for requests! Some of you already know me but for the ones who don’t, I’m Y/N L/N and I’ll keep you company during this lovely night!” You began singing a song you had written after that small presentation, and continued with some covers, singing Taylor Swift songs too, the small jar with a sign written ‘TIPS’ over it slowly being filled as the night went on.

You were completely unaware of the pair of blue eyes looking at you at some point during your performances.

As the bar slowly emptied, blue-eyed-girl included, you found yourself sitting at the same stool with the same guitar in hand, looking through your phone. You always did that, at the end of the night, silently hoping that someone would come up to you and offer you a record deal…

What a daydreamer.

“Still nothing?” Nancy, The bar owner asked, once the bar had definitely emptied and the doors were being locked. You sighed and put the guitar back on its stand. “Nope, nada” you stood up, taking a look at the tip jar. “At least I got some good tips tonight” you looked at her, she knew you well enough to recognize when you were sad. “Honey, don’t look at me like that,” she started, placing a hand on your shoulder. She was like s mother to you. “Eventually some producer will notice you, trust me.” You smiled sadly “I hope so” you said, and helped her with the final chores of the bar, before leaving through the back door.

It was about two in the morning, the neighborhood was pretty empty… you always found it scary. And the alleyway you got onto from exiting the backdoor, wasn’t less scary. You always speed-walked your way out of it… but today wasn’t a lucky day.

When is it ever?

You were almost onto the main street, when you felt someone sneaking up on you. You weren’t quick enough to react, the person trying to pull you somewhere but you applied resistance, pulling away. He managed to stab you through your stomach and you whined in pain through your covered mouth, the stranger’s hand covering it.

However you had a bit of luck, because your whines were loud enough to alert a certain someone’s body guard, who momentarily left his duty to have a look in the alley.. thank God he did.

The stranger, upon seeing the big men, let go of you and ran away. you slid down against the walk, not having taken notice of the man, too busy keeping your own hand on the wound on your stomach.

“Mrs. Swift, I think we’re gonna need to call an ambulance.”

You weren’t sure what happened next, as you were in shock, and not quite attentive to your surroundings. You just know that someone familiar was by your side, trying to keep you awake and all you remember is some blue eyes…

— ~ ~ —

You woke up the next morning to the sound of beeping, white walls surrounding you and the noise of people talking outside your door- probably nurses and doctors.

“Thank God you’re awake!” The voice startled you, and you turned to your left to see Nancy sitting on the chair next to your bed. “Did I faint onstage again?” You started, trying to sit up, “God, I had this weird ass dream-“ you winched in pain when you tried to sit up, “fuck-“ only then noticing that maybe it wasn’t all a dream. You lifted your shirt and saw the quite big bandage covering the left side of your stomach, some red stains on it. “Maybe it wasn’t a dream, fuck it hurts”

“We need to put a street lamp and a camera in that alleyway. I’m so sorry that happened hun,” Nancy started. “I shouldn’t have ever let you leave through the back door, I-“ you quickly interrupted her as you laid back down. “Nancy, don’t apologize, please, you couldn’t have known. No one could have” silence set between them after that, until you interrupted it with a laugh: “you know, I think I was hallucinating at some point, cause I thought I saw Taylor Swift” you laughed,

…but Nancy stayed serious.

“You weren’t hallucinating” Nancy said, her seriousness making you stop laughing. “What?” You said, looking at her with confusion written all over your face. “You weren’t hallucinating. That really was Taylor Swift. Her bodyguard saved you and She brought you here-“ you interrupted her. “Nance, seriously? Come on, don’t play with me, you know I care about that stuff-“

That’s when the door opened.

“Oh you’re awake!” The familiar voice had you immediately turning your head to where it came from. “W-what is happening- am I still high or.. on some kind of medicine?” The blonde laughed, noticing you trying to sit up but dropping her smile when she saw you wince in pain. “Woah there, lay back down,” she said and put a hand on your shoulder, fluffing your pillow as she helped you lay down.

“You’re Taylor Swift,”

“Yes”

“And you’re here,”

“Yes.”

“Am I dreaming?”

That had the blonde laugh again, looking at you. “No, Y/N you’re not dreaming. I’m actually here. And you’re actually talking to me” you were still looking at her with your jaw dropped. “How is that possible?” You said, making Taylor smile again. “Last night I was at the cafe, I come visit from time to time… and I saw you performing. I talked to Nancy about talking with you, but you were far from done so she suggested I waited for you to finish your shift, so that’s what I did, I didn’t expect… that,” she said, gesturing to your wound.

“I-I’m sorry you saw me perform last night!? And your songs too!?!? Oh my god that’s so embarrassing-“ Taylor was quick to interrupt you. “No no no don’t say that! I was actually about to say that you were amazing! That’s what I wanted to talk to you about…” she looked at you hopefully, you were still wonderstruck about all the situation. “I-I’m sorry I might need some time to process all this” Taylor giggled again and nodded, letting you process what was happening.

A couple minutes later you looked back at Taylor and smiled slightly “okay, you can go ahead,” you said, and Taylor smiled. “Y/N, I will go straight to the point. I heard your original songs and Nancy told me that you write and compose your own songs. Would you like to write and sing a song with me?” That’s when your jaw dropped once again. You were quiet for a couple more minutes. “I’m sorry- you would like to write and- and sing a song, WITH ME?” You emphasized the last two words, you know, for good measure.

The blonde in front of you nodded, and you began talking again. “But- I’m no one- I mean I don’t have a producer, a label, a manager? I don’t even have an album?” The blue eyed woman shrugged. “That’s not a problem, I mean, Nancy here told me that you want a career as a singer, maybe we can make that happen, no? Plus, I’d be really happy and honored to write a song with you!”

You were freaking out, your favorite singer ever had just asked you to write a song with her. And who were you to say no to that!?

Within the next couple days, you were out of the hospital. Taylor had visited both days, just getting to know you. You still felt like you were dreaming, but it was all so true and real. The luck you never had came just at the right moment, when you needed it the most.

That day, as you were being discharged, you were shocked once again when you saw the blonde at the door. “Hey there, ready to go?” Wait, what? You thought you were gonna have to walk home alone, but here she was, picking you up and taking you home. “Uh-yeah sure” you said and slowly walked over to her, you still had some trouble walking, as it hurt your insides… literally, where you were stabbed. You could feel the pain even with all the painkillers.

“Do you need help?” Taylor asked when she heard you wince in pain. You shook your head, hand over the bandage as you kept walking over to her. She sighed and walked over to you, wrapping an arm around you to support you. “You’re stubborn, aren’t you?” You blushed a little at her comment, though appreciating the help and occasionally leaning onto her. You were both lucky that the hospital had an underground parking, no one actually saw Taylor and even if they did, Nashville’s a pretty chill town, they’re used to her.

“Where’s your bag?” She asked once you reached the car. You looked at her with confusion written all over your face. “My…bag?” Taylor took some time to reply, closing the car door before getting in from the other side. “Yeah, you’re supposed to come at my place…” you were even more confused now. “I am?” That made Taylor laugh, you looked so confused right now. “Yeah, but I’m guessing that Nancy didn’t tell you. Well it’s fine, I can just land you my clothes. I’m taller then you so they’ll be big for you, but I’m sure you’ll be just fine. Oh by the way, my mom’s waiting for us at home with pumpkin chocolate chip cookies, I hope you like them”

And here you were freaking out again. “Your mom as in- Mama Swift?” Taylor hadn’t stopped laughing one second. “Yeah, her. I didn’t realize you were a fan of mine” she smiled, gently nudging your shoulder. “Yeah- of course I am! When I was 10 you were like the talk of the town, i never once managed to come see you in concert and 17 years later I’m in your car, going to your place and getting to record a song with you? That’s like a dream come true, girl” Taylor laughed at that, god, you loved her laugh.

When you arrived at the Nashville house you were greeted by her mother. She asked you about the incident with that stranger, but then proceeded to make you feel at home, her dog, kitty, being a big help in that as she wanted to jump on you, but Taylor had to hold her back as you were still injured.

She gave you a quick tour of the house and ended it in the music room. “Oh wow this is amazing” you said as you walked in, different types of guitars hung on the wall, the huge piano in the middle of it, just wow. You looked at the guitars first, looking a bit longer at the blue koi fish guitar, your favorite.

“Wanna play it?” She said from behind you, you smiled a little but you had a tendency to break other people’s stuff, so you declined the offer, even though eventually your finger pressed on a piano key. You pressed that a couple times before getting a melody in mind and making a brief chord progression, then you took your phone and typed in the chord progression. Taylor looked at you in amusement.

“Is that how you get your ideas?” She asked and you nodded, feeling a bit tired so you sat down on the piano stool. “Yeah. Some times I press a random piano key, and I have perfect pitch so it doesn’t take me long to make a chord progression and arpeggios… then according to how the whole of it makes me feel, I write the lyrics. Or sometimes I get a tune in my mind and play around with it” you said, Taylor smiled and made you scoop over on the stool, making space for her.

“Play the chord progression, keep with it for a while” at that point you had figured out what she had in mind, so you began playing. At times emphasizing some notes more than the other, switching up the rhythm, and Eventually Taylor started coming up with lyrics.

It was your turn now to look at her in amusement, she was so focused and you could see how she felt the melody, how each word came running to her as if she was brainstorming a perfect combination of words.

“Hold on, hold on, lemme record this, this is so good already” she said and took out her phone, recording the whole process. You eventually began harmonizing with her and adding lyrics, both getting lost in the moment as you completed first and second verse.

“Woah,” you said after both of you had gone silent. “That was, I don’t know. I’ve never written something so fast. It’s coming out so good, Tay” you said, the nickname slipping easily from your lips as you scribbled down the last lyrics you had come up with. “This is gonna be one hell of a song Y/N, I can feel it. We wrote two verses in less than… what, 10 minutes?” You nodded and took a look at the scrapbook Taylor had brought. “Okay, we have two verses. We need choruses and pre-choruses and I’ll leave the bridge up to you because your bridges are like, the best thing to ever exist on earth”

It was her turn to laugh at your comment, and you soon joined her in laughter, unaware of her mother’s eyes on both of you, through the door.

Andrea had never seen her daughter this happy.

— ~ ~ —

It had been a month since the two started writing the song, and between going to the studios in NYC and LA, now it was nearly done.

Aside from writing the song, you started spending more time together. You were really close, and Taylor was kind enough to let you stay at her place whenever you traveled around to record the song.

“God, I’m so tired” Taylor said, getting back into the NYC TriBeCa house after a long day at the studio with you, the backing vocals needed to be added so that’s what you did. You nodded at her statement. “Yeah, I’m tired too and I don’t even do it yearly like you do” she nodded as well and went to get a quick shower. When she was done, it was your turn to get a shower and when you went back into the living room Taylor was watching a rerun of FRIENDS, and you joined Taylor on the couch like you always did: laying down on your side with your head on her lap.

It had become usual for the both of you, none of you minding the physical touch, as Taylor loved it and so did you, never having gotten it enough when you were a kid. She would play with your hair and/or trace her fingers on your arm, and god, you felt like home.

Oh, I’m falling in love…

When the episode finished and the post-credit scenes were being rolled, you turned to lay on your back and looked up at Taylor. She soon felt your eyes on her and looked at you.

There was silence for a couple seconds before both of you started laughing. “What?” Taylor said between giggles, you brought your hands up to your face to hide the red-ish color that had started to paint your cheeks. “No nothing I just…” you took a deep breath, and once your cheeks didn’t feel warm anymore, you removed your hands.

Thank god Taylor didn’t notice the blush.

“I was just thinking and… if you hadn’t come into the cafe that night, I wouldn’t have met you and we wouldn’t have recorded our first songs together… this could make me start my career, this could make my dreams come true… and all because of you, Tay” you smiled and sat up, looking at her. She smiled back. “Y/N…” she started, and you hummed, as to signal her to continue talking. “Instead of putting out the song on platforms, what do you say if we play it together at my next concert? So everyone can see you, hear it live… you know,” she shrugged and smiled, watching shock take over your features.

“Are you sure? I- I mean- that would be amazing, Tay! Oh my god, yes please!” You had a thousand thoughts going on in your pretty little mind, but one was better than all of them: you would be performing on stage with Taylor Swift. The older woman hugged you and you hugged her back tightly. Once the initial shock had worn off, you started watching another rerun of FRIENDS.

“I never asked, and now I’m curious so, what’s your type?” Taylor said out of the blue, when the episode had almost ended. You didn’t think much of it, and your reply came pretty quickly. “Well, definitely girls-“ you were about to continue, but Taylor interrupted you: “no shit sherlock” you stared at her wide eyed “you knew???” You asked, laughing at yourself. “Uh DUH? Your outfits basically scream “I’M GAY” even if you’re wearing my clothes which are like, the straightest clothes possible” she laughed again, making you blush. “I’m gonna take that as a compliment”

You punched her shoulder jokingly and continued with your explanation. “I don’t know, honestly. I Focus more on personality then appearance, even if I do have a thing for ocean blue eyes” Taylor didn’t seem to have caught the hint, and even if she did, she let it slide.

A couple weeks later you were standing backstage to Taylor’s concert, anxiously waiting for it to begin. It would take a while before she got to the Surprise Songs, and you already knew that you were gonna die. You were never good at handling anxiety.

“Hey, how are you doing?” You felt a hand on your shoulder, and turned around to see Taylor in her Lover outfit. You had to force yourself not to look at her legs or let your jaw drop. “I uh- I’m nervous. Really nervous” Taylor smiled and hugged you. “It’ll be okay, trust me alright? You’re talented, your voice is amazing… you- we rehearsed this song so many times, it’s going to be just fine.”

Her words of reassurance helped you stay calm, until she got to the acoustic set. “Welcome to the acoustic set!” Taylor said, cheers of crowd filling your ears. “So, the surprise songs for today are a bit more… surprising, as we’ll have not 2, but 3 surprise songs, and that’s because we have a surprise guest today!” The crowd cheered once again, and you started feeling insecure. They probably expected someone famous, not an unknown singer.

“Let me say a few things about her first. As you all know, I was discovered at Bluebird Cafe in Nashville… I went to visit, almost a couple months ago and there was this girl, playing a few of her original songs and also covers… and I really, really loved her voice, and the feelings she made me feel, I don’t know, I had to get to know her. So I did, and today we’re both here with a song that we wrote together, please welcome onstage Y/N L/N!”

The crowd cheered once more, and you made your way onstage, heart thumping in your chest as you reached the front stage, smiling brightly as you took a brief second to look around, before bringing the microphone up to your mouth “oh my God hi everyone! I’m so nervous, this is literally my first time on a stage, and I might start rambling so excuse me” you giggled, fans cheered and you tried to steady your shaky voice.

“Uhm okay. I don’t know what to say honestly, I grew up in Nashville and I grew up listening to Taylor’s songs so yeah, fellow Swiftie here” once again, the crowd cheered. “I grew up working and playing my music at bluebird cafe, hoping for someone to notice me and to offer me a record deal… no one ever did. I mean, I still don’t have a record deal but never in my craziest mind would I have imagined that at some point in my life I’d meet Taylor and she’d want to write a song with me. Tay, You’re the closest friend I have and I just want to thank you, thank you so much for trusting me, for giving me this opportunity,”

Taylor smiled and walked over to hug you tightly, bringing the microphone away from her mouth as she could feel your heart thumping, and said “You got this girl. I know you do. I love you.” You smiled brightly and pulled back from the hug. “Anyway, this is the song we came up with, it’s called ‘A Way In.’ We Really hope you’ll like it”

You sat down at the piano, starting with the melody of the song. Taylor started singing, and you had the harmonies for the most part of it, as well as the highest vocals, the belt and bridge. Even if it was Taylor’s concert, she wanted you to have your moment, she wanted you to start your career beautifully and this could be the right way to do so.

When the song finished, the cheers were louder then ever. You got a standing ovation, Taylor herself was looking at you with proud eyes and smile and clapping for you, you walked over and gave her another tight hug, before looking back at the crowd. Tears in your eyes, and you took your microphone again. “Thank you so so so so much guys. Hopefully we’ll cross paths again” you threw a kiss to Taylor and walked backstage, letting Taylor procede with the actual surprise songs.

When you got backstage, all the cheering was for you. You hugged and thanked everyone, before going to Taylor’s dressing room and changing back into your normal clothes.

When the concert finished, you didn’t expect Taylor to come straight to you and hug you tightly, kissing your cheeks. “Y/N that was amazing! Did you even hear yourself? I never had a crowd cheer that loud for me! They absolutely loved you!” She smiled brightly and took a water bottle that was handed to her, as well as a towel for her sweat. “Tay, you’re exaggerating” you giggled “no I’m definitely not! Wait and see the videos on tiktok later tonight”

Taylor went and got changed, as the stadium cleared out after the long concert. When she was finished, as you were walking out the stage through the back. You were talking with Andrea when Taylor grabbed your arm and pulled you back to her, not giving you time to react before she pressed her lips on yours.

The time felt like it was passing by in slow motion, Taylor was kissing you. She was kissing you and she seemed hesitant about it, and upon realizing what was happening, you brought your arms around her neck, deepening the kiss as Taylor squeezed her grip on your hips, smiling in the kiss as metaphorical fireworks exploded around you.

When Taylor pulled back, your foreheads stayed connected. She looked at you, eyes full of lust, and she brought a hand up to brush some hair away from your face.

“You said you were straight,” you whispered, hinting a laugh.

“Yeah, I might have lied”

You giggled and leaned in to kiss her once again.

You were completely unaware of the few hundreds of fans and paparazzi taking pictures and videos of the two of you making out.

#Taylor Swift #taylors version #eras tour #the eras tour #taylor swift x y/n #taylor swift x you #taylor swift x reader #taylor swift x fem!reader #singer songwriter

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juiceicicles · 10 months

Text

Mean and Scary | Chapter 1: King of Hawkins High

AO3 Link:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/48053206/chapters/121165750

Pts: 1, 2, 3

As he traipses through the woods, Eddie tries to get a bearing on what is about to happen and what his plan is for when it inevitably goes sideways.

Dealing pot to Hawkins Royalty like King Steve isn’t entirely out of the ordinary, but doing it alone at a picnic table in the middle of the isolated woods? Yeah, not Eddie’s smartest decision for a meeting place.

In his defense, he’s only a hop skip and a jump away from the high school, and he couldn’t be assed to drive any further for what’s likely going to be a one time payment of $20. $25, if he overcharges Steve (which, he absolutely plans to do.)

Eddie finally gets to the clearing and Steve jumps when he notices him, finally looking away from a tree he was seemingly having a very intense staring match with.

“Whoa, hey, hey, hey! Sorry,” Eddie chuckles a bit awkwardly, trying his best to subconsciously communicate that he is not a threat, because he really doesn’t wanna get his lights punched out right now “Didn't mean to scare you.”

Eddie sits down and his metal lunchbox clatters onto the table —Steve flinches again. Boy, Harrington is jumpy— and sits across from him. He opens up his Pail-o’-Drugs and watches as Steve drums his fingers on the table.

“There's, uh... There's nothing to worry about. Okay? No one ever comes out here. We're safe. I promise.” Eddie honestly didn’t expect Steve Harrington to be worried about being caught, considering that Steve apparently used to hold daily house parties.

He still can’t believe it. King Steve goddamn Harrington sitting there, in all his douchey glory. Or at least, that’s what Eddie expected. Instead he sort looks exhausted. His eyes keep flitting around, and he looks like he just saw a ghost.

You see, Harrington was never a dick to Eddie, specifically. However, he sure as hell didn’t treat the freaks of Hawkins High with any sort of sympathy. Hence Eddie’s original plan to act like the biggest asshole he possibly could without scaring off a rich customer. But something about Harrington’s eyes, a sort of dull terror etched into the hazel brown, is making Eddie reconsider that decision.

“So, how does this work, exactly?” Steve sort of mutters. This is so utterly different from everything Eddie heard about him. Steve always roamed the halls with a sick sort of ironclad confidence, with his two jackals Tommy and Carol following his every beck and call. The boy across from Eddie though? He seems so haunted. Like a flickering projection of someone. A puppet with its strings cut.

“Uhh just like any other old sale, except cash only, and for obvious reasons, no receipts,” he gives Harrington what he hopes is a reassuring smile, “I'll do you a half ounce for, uh... 20. What do you say? Plenty of bang for your buck. Should last a while.”

A squirrel skitters up a tree in the background, and Harrington gasps quietly and whips around to track it. And then, finally, it clicks for Eddie.

Steve’s worried about being seen with Eddie the Freak Munson. Figures. He shouldn’t have expected anything less from King Steve.

“Hey, we don’t need to do this. Just give me the word, and I’ll walk away.”

“It’s not that, I don’t want you to go.” Steve starts, tentatively. He’s still looking around, like somethings about to pop out of the woods. “It’s just…Do you ever feel like you’re loosing your mind?”

And, of course Eddie feels like he’s lost his marbles. He’s a super senior with the nickname the Freak. Obviously he sometimes feels a little crazy. He’s a little surprised that notorious cool guy Steve Harrington feels that way, though.

He makes the decision right then and there to see this out, because even if Harrington’s afraid of being caught, there’s something here that Eddie’s missing.

“You know on a daily basis. I feel like I’m loosing my mind right now,” screw it, might as well be honest, go big or go home right? “doing a drug deal with Steve Harrington, former king of Hawkins High.”

“Ah, well, I haven’t been king for a while…” Steve trails off.

Eddie remembers Billy Hargrove. Remembers how he made him want to beg every god there was for Steve to steal back the crown. Billy Hargrove was mean to Eddie. He was mean to everyone. And he wasn’t highschool-mean either, he was Larry Munson mean. He was a jackass who wasn’t afraid of anyone and wanted you to know it.

Unprompted, Eddie remembers the first time he met Steve. Before he was Hawkins Royalty, before he was a jock and a bully, before Eddie was the freak and not just a freak. Eddie had just gotten to Hawkins, his old man had been put away and the US government dropped lil’ Eddie on Wayne’s doorstep. He’d met some friends and formed a shitty garage band. They’d played at the middle school talent show, and Eddie had lost his guitar pick. A boy about his age had given it back, told him his name was Steve and he had found it underneath his chair in the seats.

“You know, this isn't the first time that we've, um... Hung out.”

“No?”

Eddie lets out a little chuckle. Of course Steve wouldn’t remember. “It’s alright.”

He clutches at his heart like he’s been shot with an arrow and flings himself off the bench and into a pile of leaves behind him. He hears Steve let out a little gasp before he hops back up.

“I wouldn’t remember me either, Harrington!”

Steve looks a little amused, and Eddie catches a light brown blob in his peripheral vision. He combs his fingers through his hair and dislodges a dead leaf.

“Honestly, do I have stuff in my hair?”

Steve lets out a little chuckle as Eddie starts to gets into his story. If there’s one thing Eddie Munson is good at, it’s story telling.

“Middle school, talent show. Carol I think did this cheer thing? You know the thing the,” Eddie mimed some pom poms. Steve was smiling a little bit, so Eddie continued his spiel, “and I- I was with my band.”

Suddenly Steve pipes up “Corroded Coffin! Oh my god!”

Eddie’s bewildered that Steve apparently remembered their weird prepubescent metal show. He claps his hands excitedly and points to Steve. “You do remember!”

“Yes, of course! With a name like that, how could I forget?”

“I dunno. You’re a freak.” Eddie’s pretty pleased with himself when his lack of brain-to-mouth filer apparently doesn’t offend Steve. In fact, Steve breaks out a smile. It’s less Harrington Charm then Eddie expected, more of a dorky toothy grin.

“No you just- you looked so-“

“Different? Yeah. Yeah. Well, uh, my hair was buzzed, and I didn't have these sweet old tatties yet.”

“You played guitar right?”

“Uh-huh. Still do. Still do.” And since Eddie is an impulsive mess and isn’t totally hating this interaction, he does something that totally spits in the face of the tried and true Munson doctrine and invites a preppy jock to a metal concert, “You should come see us. Uh, we play at the Hideout on Tuesdays. It’s pretty cool. We- we actually get a crowd of about five…drunks.”

Steve laughs a bit and clamps a hand over his mouth, like he’s a bit startled by the noise. Eddie doesn’t blame him, he’s a bit caught off guard too.

“It’s not exactly the Garden, but, you gotta start somewhere, right?”

Steve looks at Eddie with a considering gaze for a moment, like he’s trying to figure Eddie out.

“You know, you’re not what I thought you’d be.”

“What, a total freak?”

“No, no. Honestly? I thought you’d be mean. And scary.”

“Me? Steve Harrington thought I’d be scary?”

“Yeah! You’ve got this whole, I dunno, chains and leather vibe. Thought you wouldn’t give me the time of day.”

“Yeah, well, I thought you’d be mean and scary too.”

“Yeah?”

“Terrifying.” Eddie’s hit with the sudden realization that he’s completely forgot about the drug deal he came here for and plops himself back down at the picnic table. “Uh, so, in other good news, flattery works with me, so... Twenty-five percent discount for the half. Fifteen bucks. You're robbing me blind here, you know.”

“…do you have anything maybe stronger?”

462 notes · View notes

jadeylovesmarvelxo · 1 year

Text

Eddie thinking he's a suave ladies' man as he tries to talk to you but realising he has no game whatsoever. You find it endearing.

Minors dni, Eddie being adorable and flustered, fluffy fic.

Don't copy, reuse or repost my work.

❤️

In his head, he thinks he's suave, charming and a ladies' man but in reality, he blushes and makes a doofus of himself in front of pretty girls.

Eddie has a major crush on you and he doesn't know what to do. He couldn't stop thinking about you.

He spends most of his time talking to Uncle Wayne or the guys, they are used to his chaotic energy and goofball shit.

Most girls ignore, roll their eyes at him or call him "freak"

The small few that do notice him, who have flirted back, who he's met at shitty dive bars don't stick around long.

You were talking to Chrissy, he opened his mouth to say hello but his voice came out all squeaky and made him curse himself out in his head.

So when he saw you for the first time he acted like he was confident, cool and shit but in reality he was a mess inside.

To him, you were beautiful, sweet and an angel on earth, some mythical type of elven princess from LOTR, a goddess.

Chrissy looked at him all sympathetic and introduced you to him while he called himself several names in his head.

He missed the shy smile you sent his way, the intrigued look as he skulked off in the opposite direction hoping to forget the disaster of a first meeting.

✨💕

After that Eddie attempted to show off while he was near your vicinity. Hoped you would notice him while he was strutting around like a peacock on the Hellfire lunch table and throwing his daily insult at Jason.

It might have worked in theory if he didn't notice you actually staring over at him one time and he froze, like a deer in headlights.

Kinda like this.

Then as he jumped off the table he managed to trip over his own feet, face plant on the floor and shoot back up like nothing had happened.

He really hoped you didn't notice that.

But you did, the Hellfire boys snickered in the background until he gave them one of his death glares and they shut up immediately.

He was so pathetic at this. In his mind, he was certain he was all cool and suave but in real life he was having no luck wooing you.

Rock stars wouldn't have this problem he told himself sullenly with a pout on his face.

A pout that you thought was cute as fuck, however Eddie didn't know that yet.

❤️

After a little while Eddie was ready to give up, he tried speaking to you but got all tongue-tied and overacted to show that he wasn't sweating his ass off while you looked at him with your pretty eyes.

He was forced to realise he didn't have much game as he thought he did and was considering asking Steve for help. The chicks all loved him right?

Stupid, stupid son of a bitch he berated himself as he stomped to away from his usual spot in the woods still sulking.

With minutes to spare until he had to get to class, he grudgingly gets up.

Just one week left until he graduated this hellhole he consoles himself.

His army crawling to a D in Miss O'Donnell's class finally paid off.

Then you walked up to him as he got to the school entrance and he felt his heart stutter in his chest.

"Hi, Eddie" you murmur and you sound like you are nervous, shy too just like how he feels.

Why were you nervous? Did your friends tell you he was mean and scary or something?

"Hi, uh sweetheart" Yeah, nice going doofus he scolds himself.

"I was wondering if you had a date for prom?" he blinks, once, twice, then shakes his head.

He planned on avoiding prom like the plague, conformist bullshit he told himself. Though if he was honest he would have sucked it up and gone for you. If you wanted.

Not that you would ever ask but he would.

"Nah, not my thing sweetheart" is it his imagination or did you look disappointed? You had guys ask you for weeks but you turned them down much to the relief Eddie felt when he saw it happen.

"Oh, okay. I just thought if it was your type of thing then maybe we could have gone together but it's not so uh cool" You look up at him through your lashes and he thinks his brain short circuits.

...

You, the most beautiful girl he had ever met in his life wanted to go with him.

"Why would you want to go with me?" he asks stunned because hasn't he been making an ass of himself for weeks and weeks now? Months even.

"Because you're cute, endearing, actually to me you're super fucking hot and I struggle to know what to say around you"

Did he end up getting to class after all and he was daydreaming? No... no this was very real and he shrugged off the nerves he was feeling and grinned.

"Milady, I would love to go to prom with you" The look on your face, the joy makes his heart ping in delight.

"Great, I really like you, Eddie" You move closer to him and before he knows it he's kissing you and you're kissing him back and everything is fucking incredible.

❤️

The rest of Hellfire was stunned as you joined their table and settled on Eddie's knee while kissing his cheek.

He heard Jason's shout of shock and lazily flipped him the bird, he was too into his girl to notice.

His, you were his. He couldn't believe it.

"Dude, how??" Lucas asked him stunned, mirroring Dustin and Mike's look, he winked at his sheeples and shrugged.

"Couldn't resist the Eddie Munson game could you princess?" you giggle and press a kiss to his lips and he basks in the glow of your beaming smile and that gorgeous giggle.

Eddie felt like a rockstar, 86 was his year, just like he suspected.

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson imagine

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smallgodseries · 5 months

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She will never tell you that love is love, because she knows that love is so many countless, complicated other things.

Love is negotiation. Love is honesty. Love is conversation. Love is complex and scary and wonderful and all-encompassing and negotiated. Love is fickle and love is loyal. Love is not a choice. Love is not destiny. Love can be chosen. Love is not always at first sight. Love is conflict resolution.

Love is, as she will be the first to tell you, very hard work, and absolutely worth the effort.

Polly Ann has room in her heart for every love she finds, and a room in her temple for each of them, should they choose to inhabit it. Not everyone knows how to share, and some find her love to be rejection, find the fact that she won’t repudiate all others to be confirmation that her love is inherently untrue. They consider her shallow. They consider her unfaithful. They consider her untrustworthy.

They couldn’t be more wrong. The depth required to be open and emotionally honest with her partners is an ocean; the faith required to know and believe that her lovers love her even when they aren’t with her is an act of trust verging on prayer. She has love enough to fill the world, and boundaries enough only to offer her heart where it seems desired. She takes “no” for an answer too honest to be argued with, and she doesn’t play hard to get.

Polly Ann will love you if you let her, and she’ll like you if you won’t, because her affection isn’t conditional on being loved in return. She can love alone if she needs to, and she doesn’t cross boundaries.

She will never tell you that love is love. But she will absolutely tell you that love is the foundation of everything else worth having.

And she will love you.

#seanan mcguire #lee moyer #small gods #smallgodseries #icons and stories

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greenboyfriend · 5 months

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choose a tile! (tarot card reading)

image source image 1: through the darkness of future past, the magician longs to see image 2: one chants out between two worlds, image 3: fire, walk with me!

1.・。.・゜✭

you're overcome with guilt & anguish. you may have made some sort of mistake, and now you're taking it out on yourself big time. you may already be dealing with other, hard hitting issues, so kicking yourself while you're down is definitely not going to help you. you're going to have to try something different. look at all the areas of your life and consider what needs balancing. maybe you've been too hard on yourself, or focusing too much on a situation, isolating yourself, ect*. find what needs to be changed and make it happen! self love should be your priority. it has the potential to take you a long way, even to the point of great reward! being kind to yourself is a lot easier said than done, but with the right mixture of influences (for example, surrounding yourself with supportive friends, reaching out for help, being open & honest with your feelings, ect) you will see the path start to clear. it's not always easy, but someday, it will feel so good to look back & be proud of how far you've come!

*these are all just examples of imbalances, meant to get u thinking about what may need changing, and are not necessarily relevant

(9 of swords reversed, temperance, the empress reversed)

2.・。.・゜✭

okay... like, 6 cards just poured out of the deck. lets get this shit 🔥💯

after toppling from the heights and/or having a massive realization, your life has become chaos. this change has left you feeling guilty and maybe you're beating up on yourself as well. your tendency to shirk away from others, hide the truth and to value appearances over actual substance/health doesn't help things, either. it's time to get real, not just with yourself but especially with those around you, too. not telling the truth is actively making this situation worse. it's not wrong to need someone to talk to, and if you need to gush your feelings, that's more than OK-- it's exactly what you need. it can be scary to open up, but the fool encourages you to take that "crazy" chance, and trust in those around you.

(9 of swords reversed, the fool, the empress reversed, the tower, queen of swords reversed, knight of cups)

3.・。.・゜✭

diligent and independent, you're well on your way to creating the comfortable lifestyle you so crave. however, there's some sort of hard decision you're going to have to make, or are in the process of making. this likely has to do with love (not necessarily romantic) and especially with forgiveness. before we get into that, though, it may help you to prepare for this by enjoying yourself during this time. you've been working hard, so you deserve to enjoy some of the benefits! when it comes to this decision, you're going to need to be bold. use the courage of your convictions to propel you forward! you will also find that your intuition guiding you-- let it. be aware of your dreams, gut reactions, and messages from within. try to rid your approach of negativity and see the best in those around you, including yourself. but in the meantime, relax! luxuriate! eventually you'll find that all's well that ends well.

(9 of pentacles, king of wands reversed, judgement, ace of cups reversed)

thanks for reading! if you'd like to get an in-depth reading about your specific situation, please send me a dm or an ask!

oh and the poem at the beginning is from twin peaks (the tv show not the damned titty restaurant!!!!!)

#tarot #tarot reading #tarotblr #tarotcommunity #tarot cards #pick a card #pick a picture #pick a pile #pick a photo #pick an image #pac #spiritual #spirituality #witchblr

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bb-eilish · 2 years

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Such a Brat -1-

pairing; student!soobin x fem!reader

warnings; Blowjob, face fucking, kissing, swearing, dirty talk, pet names, Dom!Soobin, Sub!Reader, slight nipple play, being walked in on kinda, arguing, light brat taming, P in V sex, creampie, cum eating.

A/N; The second one will be like 70% smut most likely. I’m also opening up my requests!!

part 2 teaser here

full part 2 here

During times like this, you can't help but to reminisce about your freshman year of college. Everything was dazzling new to you and to be honest, overwhelming.

Your classes were spread out amongst an array of buildings, differing in sizes, and smells. You were thrust into the world of being an adult. Your group of friends were like angels being sent from heaven, saving you so much anxiety and trouble.

The feeling of appreciation slightly smooths the edges of your, currently, incredibly unimpressed mood. You should've known something was up when your supposed "angel" like friends begged you to watch a scary movie with them.

It wasn't bad at first, just....eery.

The over-dramatic screams from the victims of the axe-wielding maniac caused you to shamefully giggle into your wrist.

Your friends, Yeji and Karina, left about 30 minutes ago. Like usual, you're now stuck with the rest of them: Yeonjun, Soobin, Beomgyu, Taehyun, and Kai. And to add on to that, you live with 2 of them.

Like you mentioned before, your friends saved you from a lot. One of those anxiety-inducing things was a place to live. So now you live with Taehyun and Kai. The rest live together the floor under you, convenient.

But now you're seriously considering witchcraft or something, lying to the apartment complex about them so they get kicked out? Maybe.

Your face is uncomfortably squished into your wrinkled pillow, the after-effects of fear leaving in waves.

Why else would they beg you? You blame yourself honestly.

Your friends thought it was a brilliant idea to buy some random scary mask from Party City, and of course, buy the matching bloody knife as well.

The credits cascade down the now dark screen and everyone stretches, and unbeknownst to you, share a knowing look with each other-trying their hardest to not laugh or crack a smile. Being a good friend, you grab all the discarded food and random wrappers laying around the couch, in the couch, and for some reason in your bra.

"I'm gonna take a piss" Soobin announces, you grimace at his choice of words and throw away the garbage into its respective can.

"Y/n, can I use your phone charger? Pretty please" Beomgyu begs you, sticking his bottom lip out and cocking his head to the side from where he kneels on your couch.

"Sure, go get it"

A loud ‘hmph' comes from him and you giggle out a sigh, "what?".

"I want you to go get it, I'm your guest" He kicks his legs like a child throwing a tantrum after sitting on the piece of furniture correctly.

You blink at him and sigh, "Fine".

From the kitchen, you make your way to your bedroom, the last door at the end of the hallway. passing the bathroom you realize the door isn't closed, it takes you a little too long to put the pieces together.

Sighing again, you lightly push your door open and mindlessly turn on your bedside lamp. The main light hurts your eyes so you rarely use it. Your bed sits pristinely against the farthest wall, right next to an outlet with your white charger sticking out of it. When you're close enough you bend over to snag it from the wall.

Being your organized self, you take a few seconds to wrap it together neatly. A second later you pick up the faint sounds of footsteps on your carpet, your first guess is Beomgyu. You wouldn't be surprised if he came after you just to whine and complain about how long you're taking.

Yet, something didn't feel right. Beomgyu isn't this quiet. The owner of the footsteps grips your waist and growls loudly. The terrified scream that leaves your lips makes you nervous you might get a noise complaint. You seemingly jump 60 feet and your knees almost give out, one of your hands shoots to the wall for leverage while the other comes to your chest and grips your shirt.

You pant while leaning against the wall, finally getting a good look at the perpetrator. A stupid bloody mask is slipped off of Soobin's head and he, along with the rest of your friends, are laughing their asses off. A couple of them are even on the ground.

A scowl instantly comes across your face and you glare at them, mainly Soobin. His stupidly attractive face is scrunched together in laughter. You try and up keep up your pissed off demeanor but you can’t, a smile breaks through and you can’t help but giggle.

"You guys are so mean, I hate you" You whine and laugh, shuffling quickly to your bed. Hiding under the covers seems like a good idea so you face plant into your pillows and yank the large duvet over yourself. The laughing only gets louder so you groan and push the sides of the pillow into your ears. Mainly to hide the laughter bubbling more and more in your throat.

It ends a minute later only because the group migrates to the living room.

You steady your breathing as you feel your mattress dip next to one of your legs. "You okay?" He chuckles, just from his voice you can tell it's Soobin.

You don't feel like answering but Soobin peels the duvet from you.

"I hate you" You say as you lift your head from the pillows so you can glare at him properly. He gazes at you for a second, noting the playfulness you’re trying to hide. He laughs and sends a wink as he goes to join the rest in the living room.

You decide you're just gonna go to bed, so you reluctantly pluck your charger from the ground and plug it back into the outlet. Fishing your phone from your pocket so you can charge it. With a huff, you switch off your lamp and collapse back into your previous position giggling here and there.

///////////////////

Your alarm springs you out of your hate-induced sleep. Being a light sleeper was always good for your morning shift, which you, unfortunately, have to endure today until your first class which starts at 12:00.

Groggily, you throw your legs over the side of your bed and head over to your closet. Picking out your uniform, laying it on your bed along with some underwear and socks.

The sun pours through your blinds and it takes a few minutes for your eyes to adjust. You shuffle to your phone and yank it off the charger, bringing it with you to the bathroom.

To be honest, all you wanna do is ignore your friends until they beg for you to forgive them. But for now, you need to shower.

The hallway floorboards are annoyingly cold against your bare feet and it causes a scowl to develop on your features. The apartment is quiet, something you actually enjoy about getting up so early. Stepping into the bathroom was also painful, the tile being even colder.

The door shuts and locks behind you and you take a second to rub the sleep out of your droopy eyes, yawning as well.

Your eyes open again and your hand reaches for the handle of the shower, turning it to the perfect temperature for how cold it is outside.

Undressing was a blur and the second the hot water makes contact with your skin your shoulders droop in relief. Your head tips back to wet your hairline. Your hair quickly becomes drenched and you go to squeeze some shampoo in your hand, rubbing the nice smelling substance between your palms.

While you’re scrubbing the grime away your mind drifts to Soobin, specifically last night when you were alone in your room. The look he gave you has you pausing for a moment. The more you think about it the more warm your face becomes.

Scoffing you glare at the wall and continue what you were doing.

///////////

Stepping out of the shower you almost slip and die, probably at least. Your towel gets wrapped around you in record time because of how cold it is. The sound of muffled voices comes from outside the bathroom and memories of last night quickly resurface again.

"Motherfuckers" you mutter while drying off your hair.

You wrap the, now, damp towel back around you and unlock the door, cold air is blasted into your face and around your body. Quickly, you shuffle back towards your room crossing your fingers hoping they won't notice you.

"There she is"

A sigh leaves your mouth as you halt in your tracks, looking over your shoulder. Everyone is sitting in your living room, now staring at you.

Putting on a tight-lipped smile you say, "Yes?'. You can’t help how your eyes find Soobin’s fairly quickly, the smirk plastered on his face has your stomach start to churn nervously.

You roll your eyes and don’t wait for them to answer before hurtling back towards your room, it’s cold as fuck.

As soon as you get the door closed you lean against it and take a breath, you'll be honest; you have a giant fucking crush on Soobin and lately your mind has been flooded with not-so-appropriate thoughts. Which has led you to be a tad meaner in hopes of covering up your crime.

Taking a shaky breath you push yourself from the door and drop the towel, shimmying on your work uniform. Soon taking a seat at your vanity and combing through your hair. You decide to forego makeup today and grab your jacket that was thrown hazardously across the back of your chair. You stop for a moment to see how loud it is in your living room.

The muttering has stopped and you peek out, scanning the area. It seems your living room is actually empty for once.

You step into the dim hallway and pat yourself to make sure your phone is secure in your pocket once more. You slip your shoes on when you're at the door and grab your keys from the hook next to the entryway.

"Y/n, wait"

A voice sounds from behind you, a sleepy-looking Soobin is rubbing his eyes while sticking his hand out to stop you from leaving.

'What?" you ask, not impressed about how your heart picked up its pace.

"Can you drive me? Your job is right next to campus and my class starts an hour before yours. I also really don't feel like driving" He says, grabbing his own shoes from beside you. You're on the fence, because;

You want to spend more time with him no matter what your brain screams at you.

But you also don't feel like being on edge the entire time you're with him, you simply do not trust your thoughts.

Mulling it over in your mind takes a few seconds, but the way he literally gets on his knees, clasps his hands together and begs you makes up your mind pretty fast.

With a scowl you mutter, "fine" while unlocking the door and opening it for you both. He jumps in the air with a squeal and you have to refrain from smiling.

"Loser" you murmur, hoping it throws him off your scent. He doesn't say anything the entire time you descend the stairs or walk to your car.

He does speak up though when you ask him why he was the only one left, to which he replies that he took a 5 minute nap and when he woke up you were the only one left. This gets a giggle from you and it instantly infects him as well, the mood lightens and he takes advantage of that-cracking a few jokes. Some of them even have your eyes brimming with tears.

It was all fun and games before your mind decided to ruin the cute moment you were sharing, vivid images of how his hands would look gripping certain areas of you arise.

He notices a visible difference in you and covers your free hand with one of his, which in his mind was soothing.

Thankfully he exits the car when you park before you can say anything to ruin your relationship even more. Heat stings your face as you can almost still feel his huge, warm, hand over yours. Shaking your head you throw open your car door and step carefully on the ground as to not slip on any snow or ice.

/////////////

This time of year was filled with hot chocolate and rude customers, you get that Christmas is like a month away but damn. Some of these people act like you personally killed their dog or something. Multiple instances today had you biting and tonguing your cheek instead of giving the customer a piece of your mind.

A headache sneaks up and settles on your eyes and temples, making them feel heavy and achy. Thankfully, your shift is over in about 10 minutes so you decide to take one last order before getting ready to leave.

"Hello. What can I get you today?" You glance up and smile, Yeji is standing there tapping away at her phone-per usual.

"Yeji!"

She looks up and matches your bright smile but it falters, "You look awful"

Your eyebrow quirk at her in question so she decides to show you, searching in her bag for a compact. She finally is able to snatch one and when she holds it in front of you you understand totally now.

You look like you have a headache, a grimace settles on your face as you take in your appearance. Your hair is disheveled, there's bags under your eyes, and your eyes are droopy.

"Thank god you're my last customer for today, what do you want? The usual?" You question, leaning back over your side of the counter.

She nods happily and shoves the makeup back in her bag, you press a few buttons in the register and ask her for the money. As usual, she already has the amount in her hand, she makes your life so much easier.

Telling one of the workers behind you the order, they get to work, after you give her this drink you can finally get to class and then finally get home. Your favorite show has updated its episodes on Netflix and you are dying to watch it.

Soon the drink finds it's way being handed to you, smiling at the worker you take it and quickly hand it to Yeji.

"I'll see you after class?" She questions before taking off. She's halfway at the door so instead of using the small amount of voice you have left you just nod. She gives you a smile before pushing open the clunky double doors.

//////////////

Walking over to class fom work was generally easy, not in the winter though. Your balance is awful and you've slipped at least 4 times, even though the coffee shop is practically on campus.

Thankfully this class was easy, you were not mentally ready for one of the harder courses you were forced to sign up for. Raking your fingers through your hair to calm down some of the strands was probably the most you moved for the entire class period.

Luckily it was Thursday and you don't have classes on Friday. But you still had one period left.

Exiting the class you drag your feet and rub your eyes, throwing your backpack over a shoulder as you jump a few feet when a hand lands on your shoulder. It's Kai, and he looks concerned.

"Are you okay?" You both scoot off to the nearest wall.

"Yea I'm fine, just a headache" Your smile doesn't reach your eyes and it only seems to worry him more. But he doesn't put up much of a fight, he knows how that'll end.

Sighing he says, "Alright, let me know if you need anything. I mean it"

You offer another smile and agree, waving you off he enters the classroom you just happened to leave. Letting out a sigh you merge behind the group of people who happened to walk by.

/////////////////

Today was the perfect day to be tired, your last class was only writing down notes. Your brain is practically melting in your skull and you book it to your car, again, almost slipping a few thousand times. You unfortunately couldn’t meet up with Yeji, she’ll probably understand why though.

Once the door is shut and the car is on you put on the seat warmers and everything, the cold is only making your, now, dull headache worse. You're about to reverse when you remember how you didn't come here alone, should you call him? What if he expected you to drive him back as well?

You're not a mean person naturally so you take the time to turn on your phone and scroll through your contacts.

The ringing makes your nerves fray, "Hello?"

"Uh, hey, did you want me to drive you back home too? I'm getting something to eat”You clear your throat, a moment passes before he responds.

"I was gonna drive with Tae but that sounds way better, I'm walking to the coffee shop now"

A warmth settles on your face at the fact he chose you over Tae, it sturs in your stomach. "Hurry up".

The line goes dead because you hang up immediately, trying your best not to fan girl and swoon. You put the car in park and try your best to calm your nerves in the small amount of time you were given.

God, why did he have to be so fucking cute? You slouch over and settle your forehead on your steering wheel as you fight with your own brain.

His stupid-

Your thinking is cut short once the sound of your door opening pulls you out of your aggressive thoughts.

"Hey, you okay?"

His lopsided smile has you clenching your fists, "I'm fine" you deadpan.

He only chuckles at your tone before buckling in.

"Where are we going to eat? Panda express?"

A grimace takes over your face as you peek up at him, "Hell no, we're fine dining today" While putting the vehicle in reverse again.

His eyebrows shoot up in shock as he begins messing with the radio, he settles on one of your favorite songs. That just so happens to be romantic. You couldn't pass up the chance on singing your heart out.

He stays quiet at first, and then surprisingly joins in.

The whole experience was...new. You glance at him every once and awhile just to ogle his face when he sings. He somehow looks even better as his eyes are hooded in concentration while he lets out peaceful melodies.

The songs comes to an end and he doesn't miss a second to compliment you, "You have such a nice voice". The way he looks at you has the air in your lungs evaporating. If you didn't know him you'd assume he was about to confess his love for you.

"Shut up" You quietly say, thanking god that you're finally at burger king. It's busy, the cars are almost lined up the road and you whine in response.

"Wow, fine dining indeed" He jokes, this time you laugh and go to playfully shove him. The feel of his toned bicep under your hand has you reeling back the appendage. He doesn't seem to notice your borderline disgusted action though.

////////////

The entire car ride was normal, to him probably. To you it was great, you think he's the funniest and you hope you weren't too obvious about it.

Opening the door you're met with groans and complains.

"Why didn't you get me food?"

"You guys got food and you didn't tell us?"

"Aw, did you guys have a date at Burger King? How romantic"

You send a glare Yeonjun's way and he winks at you cheekily, "You guys don't deserve any after the stunt you pulled last night"

"Soobin's the one who did it, why does he get food"

You're speechless, you can't just be like "Oh, because I have a massive, suffocating crush on him". So you don't answer at all, opting for taking a seat at your dining table and pulling out the food from the greasy bag.

//////////

Your hand goes to snag the last fry when a much bigger hand beats you to it, your pout is met with Soobin's smirk. He probably expects you to curse him out and that’s exactly what you go to do, but you’re cut off.

"Guys"

Everyone looks to Beomgyu, who's standing in front of the tv.

"Since Christmas is coming up and we're all not going to be with each other for it, I thought of a fantastic idea. How about a trip to Jeju Island the first week of break?" He looks like he just told you he won the lottery, you giggle at it and agree.

"Sounds like fun, I'm in"

The rest of them soon follow after.

"Yea, sure"

"Sounds fun"

"I'm down"

"Sounds like a plan”

His grin only widens as he announces that he's going to book an airbnb or something so you can really get the "entire experience".

You roll your eyes while laughing, throwing the trash back in the bag and then throwing the bag away entirely.

"Oh by the way Beomgyu, I want my own room. It's bad enough I have to share an apartment with you guys, no offense"

"I'll see" he mutters into his phone, that doesn't sound very promising.

"I'm bored" You whine while crashing on one side of the couch that isn't occupied.

"We could watch another scary movie" Kai says, the group giggles.

"Wow Kai you're so funny" You say mockingly.

"We just got a new playstation if that sounds like fun" Yeonjun says from your fridge. It sounds better than sitting here waiting to die so you agree to it.

The group naturally follows you both and soon you're all doing the same exact thing but in Yeonjun’s, Soobin’s , and Beomgyu's apartment.

The switch seems to be in vain because a wave of exhaustion creeps in and you find yourself asking who has the comfiest bed, and of course, it just has to be Soobin's. Cramming the feeling of butterflies away you take a breath and do the unthinkable, enter Soobin's bedroom and tuck yourself under his covers.

Maybe this wasn't so bad, the smell of him was everywhere and it has you nuzzling further into his pillow.

//////////

Your eyes crack open, it's dark as hell and you have no idea what's happening. You wiggle your hand a bit and realize your phone is stationed right under it. Bracing yourself for the 7 suns about to blind you, you stare at the screen and turn it on.

Pain.

After you get your vision back by frantically turning down the brightness, the time reads 1:48 AM. Holy shit.

You sit up and scope the room, you can barely see anything so that doesn't help.

A yawn forces its way out of you and you stretch your limbs, swinging your legs over the side of the bed and shakily standing up. It doesn't take long for your legs to work again. The door is already open so you peek your head around the frame, still dark as hell, but you can hear the tv ever so slightly.

Shuffling your feet because lifting them would take too much energy you approach the living room, the light from the tv lighting up the open room.

You get closer and realize Soobin is sitting on his couch, by himself, watching something on his phone. You gaze at him, the light from the tv makes his skin glow and you can't look away.

The next step you take has the wood under your feet creaking, his head springs up and he looks almost stunned.

"Good morning" He sleepily smiles, you don't know what comes over you but you decide it's a good idea to make your way to him and sit almost on top of him. If you weren't tired you would've seen the quick flash of panic that overcomes him.

"You should've woken me up, I'm sorry I stole your bed" You frown, you had no idea you'd be asleep this long, you're even more shocked at the fact that nobody woke you.

"I usually don't sleep very early so you're fine, no sweat" His smile makes him look even more tired and your eyes soften if possible.

"You should get to bed, I'll head home" You go to stand but a hand quickly throws itself in front of you, halting your movements.

You look at him questioningly and he takes a second to respond, "N-no I'm fine, are you sure you have to leave? I know you like this show, we should watch it" His wide eyes have your heart collapsing and going home doesn't sound very appealing anymore.

You don't say anything as you get comfortable again, his thigh brushes against yours and you look in the opposite direction of him as your heart stutters.

/////////

Looking back at that moment was common, it's been about a month and nothing has really lived up to that. You've gotten your snarky mouth back and you bet Soobin is over the moon about it.

Your knees press into the wood of your floor as you bend over to swipe at the luggage collecting dust under your bed. You feel the material brush against your fingers and you almost fall over getting it out.

Now, what should you pack?

You're only staying there for like a week, so like any sane person you pack half your closet. What if it rains and there's no washing machine? What if you fall into a lake? Get pooped on by a random bird? Exactly.

So much could happen so you packed for everything. Bathing suit? Even though it's currently 23 degrees out, check. Proper attire for brunch with the Queen? Check.

Finally, you stuffed all of your toiletries and such into the now 600-pound suitcase.

"You ready?" A voice sounds from your door, Yeonjun pokes his head through the threshold of your room

"Yea, I'm coming out now" You mutter as your try and find a good angle to drag the thing across your floor.

"Yknow that has wheels right?"

You blink at him, "wheels?".

He chuckles and pops out the wheels that apparently fold inward, he then demonstrates by pushing and pulling the case back and forth.

You purse your lips, you've had this suitcase for like 3 years. Are you kidding?

"That's embarrassing, thank you"

He only nods and laughs at you in return, leaving the same way he came.

You eye the door before taking the handle and copying his movements, pushing and pulling it back and forth.

"huh.."

You get over it quickly as you correctly wheel it out of your room and into the bustling living room. You still can't believe you're gonna be the only girl on the trip, you even got on your knees to beg Yeji and Karina to come. They both have to see their stupid families for stupid Christmas for the ENTIRE break.

Whatever.

"Finally, Y/n" Taehyun complains, checking his pockets to make sure he has his phone.

"Oh eat my ass, I'm ready now let's go"

You love that you can joke with them like this, teasing is in your nature and it's a blessing it brings you guys together.

The guys get stuck in the doorway because they, of course, all tried to get out at once. You eyed them incredulously, you hope you don't die on this vacation but with the way things are already paying out you don't have much hope.

As you stuff yourselves in the elevator you wonder about the things you can do on the island. You’ve never been before.

You almost snort as they do it AGAIN, they get stuck in the doorway as they all go at once.

"Are you guys serious?"

Some of them mutter a "shut up" while trying their best to get through. Oh, this is going to be great.

You can't lie, you always made fun of Soobin for having a mom van, but days like this proved to be useful.

“SHOTGUN”

You yell while trying your best to run with your luggage behind you, Kai beats you to it and sticks his tongue out. So, you do the only sane thing; have a tantrum. You're not sure if they know you're joking, sometimes you don't even know you're joking to be fair.

They probably do though, as they all laugh at you instead of helping.

"Fine, you're buying me dinner though, Kai for this sacrilege" He loudly cackles before quickly muttering apologies-closing the door in case you change your mind.

A slight pout sits on your lips as you lug your suitcase in the trunk, letting out a huff when you finally get it situated correctly. You find your way to the last small row of seats in the back of his van. The awkward bend you have to do when you walk to the back of the vehicle is worsened when you see how dirty it is. This is gonna be just fantastic.

"Soobin, you slob! Do you not clean back here? There's a graveyard of water and Gatorade bottles"

"I will turn this car around, stop complaining" You hear him screech.

"You haven't even left the parking space, dumbass"

"Don't sass me"

The 'argument' ends with you both bursting out laughing. Your behind makes contact with the seat and you make sure to stay perfectly in the middle area. The airport was only 30 minutes away so you'll be fine, hopefully.

The entire ride consisted of Kai and Taehyun passionately arguing over pokemon, what else could possibly be more important?

"Shut up, we're here" Soobin announces over the bickering, parking the van the closest to the airport doors. Which isn’t very close because this place is packed. "Grab your shit" He continues, stuffing a pocket with his car keys.

"Bitch..." You mutter, thankfully shuffling out of your seat and onto the pavement of the lot.

"That's a weird way of saying 'Oh, thank you Soobin for getting me a plane ticket, you're so handsome and charming'"

You purse your lips and grumble out another thank you, when he first bought the ticket you practically kissed the dude's fucking feet over it, but okay. He was being extra but you still thanked him anyway.

You all lug your things through back check and have them boarded, next is TSA, Beomgyu was picked to go through the huge scanning machine and the rest of you sure had a load to say about it. He T-posed in the machine while glaring at you, trying his best to subdue the smile that so desperately wanted to show.

As you approach your gate you scan the building, signs are plastered literally everywhere about going to some random country, the ceiling is glass and lets in really nice sun light, and different shops; mainly restaurants, litter the walls.

"You guys hungry? We got like an hour before the plane boards" You hope they can hear you, you're facing the other direction and you have a habit of mumbling.

Luckily they do, "I could eat, what sounds good?" Yeonjun asks, walking to where you're looking around.

"Anything is fine with me, just not McDonalds" Taehyun says, getting out his phone.

"Ugh, whatever" Beomgyu teases, joining you both in looking at the available restaurants. You squint and see the orange sign of Dunkin Donuts next to the last gate.

"It's like 8:30 can we get breakfast at Dunkin Donuts?" They all hum in agreement so you start the journey of sifting through the people that linger around the gates, some of them look absolutely pissed, other look tired, and some look ecstatic. 'Same' you think.

You feel a hand brush against yours softly and you try not to make it obvious that you're eyeing to see who it was.

Soobin towers over you, seems like he almost sprinted next to you since the last time you checked he was behind everyone. You try not to be like that, thinking he did it for a certain reason. You turn your head for a split second to gaze at the man and in the short time you almost run someone over, if it wasn't for Soobin of course, he grips your arm as he yanks you into his side.

"Y/n, not sure if you know this but you can actually use your eyes to look around" Taehyun teases you, you cackle at his joke and enter the small donut shop.

You all stand a few feet from the counter so nobody thinks you're in line as you figure out your order, everything looks good. The breakfast sandwiches especially, oh my god and the smoothies.

You make up your mind surprisingly quickly, a mango smoothie and a breakfast sandwich are calling your name. "You guys ready?" You ask.

"Yea"

"Yup"

"Mhm"

"Yes"

"Ready"

You nod and approach the counter, it's not very busy so you're first in line. The cashier's eyes widen a smidge once you order first, the group notices pretty quickly that he has an eye for you. You seem to be none the wiser. Soobin's eyes narrow skeptically at the worker but throws in his order anyway, slapping your hands away once you get your wallet from your purse.

Your eyes shoot up in question, though, he interrupts the argument he knows is a second away from leaving your lips.

The cashier continues to eye fuck you and it's starting to burn Soobin's chest, jealousy nips at his brain annoyingly. You're handed the food and go to find a table that'll fit all of you. That seems to be in the corner of the shop, you wave them over as you take a seat against the wall, immediately getting out your food and taking a sip from your smoothie.

Kai sits next to you, Beomgyu sits next to him and Yeonjun and Soobin sit across while Taehyun sits at the end. You take notice of Soobin directly in front of you and decide to spark a discussion about payment.

"Why did you pay? Now I feel bad, asshole" You mumble in his direction, mouth stuffed wth eggs and other breakfast foods.

He only smiles at your name-calling and dismisses you with a wave, so naturally, you give him the finger. The hairs on the back of your neck stand up and you suddenly are inflicted with the feeling of someone watching you. The group is busy devouring their food so you know it's not them.

"What the hell" you mumble to yourself, you peer behind the tall man in front of you to discover the worker eye fucking you, he doesn't look away when you make eye contact though. Following your gaze Soobin looks over his shoulder to see the worker, once again, unashamedly staring at you.

The bitter feeling of jealousy crawls its way back and he finds himself reaching out to you, thumb swiping over the corner of your mouth. There wasn't anything on your face but it was all he could think of. Just like he planned, your attention is ripped from the young man and to him.

And just like Y/n fashion you get nervous and almost panic, letting out a few curse words, and avoiding his eyes completely. This time it hits him differently, usually your teasing and name-calling was funny and kind cute, but this time it causes a small lump to form in his throat. Annoyance settles over his features and he remains silent until you make it back to your gate.

You take notice while sitting next to him at the gate, "Are you okay?"

Your voice makes him feel guilty which adds to the fire, his eyebrows scrunch and before he can stop himself he's letting out a, "Why do you care?"

It seems to shock you both, your own eyebrows scrunch.

"The fuck is your problem?" You adorn an offended look and it's almost like word vomit coming out of him.

"You're my problem, go fuck the Dunkin Donuts cashier or something"

Your jaw drops, as well as the others listening.

"Soobin, dude, that's not cool" Yeonjun reprimands.

His glare is turned to his phone as he lets out a quiet, "Whatever".

Your stare hasn't budged, did he really just say that? Anger floods your veins and your brain is screaming at you to say something, but you can't. So you look away, out the window at the awaiting airplanes.

Hurt settles over your heart and the look of a kicked puppy remains on your features. You daydream the whole time and are yanked out of your thoughts as the woman at the front announces that the plane is boarding. You all board last and take a seat at the back of the plane, next to Beomgyu and Kai, Taehyun, Soobin, and Yeonjun are getting buckled into the seats at the other side of the walking lane.

You're super excited but the fact Soobin just told you to go fuck some random dude still hangs over your head.

///////////////

The plane ride was only an hour-long so you only got some apple juice to satiate you. You sat there, thinking and mulling over what happened a thousand times in your head. The more you thought about it the angrier you were. Fine, if he wanted to play that game so be it.

"Buckle in your seatbelts, we are landing" A flight attendant sounds over the intercom. Chatting with Beomgyu and Kai about what you're gonna do first is almost interrupted by the same feeling of being watched. You flick your eyes to meet the gaze of Soobin, your smile dies and your eyebrows knit together.

Rolling your eyes in slight disgust you direct your attention back to the ongoing conversation and let out a laugh when Beomgyu makes a comment about purposefully losing Yeonjun and leaving.

Soon, you're landed and everyone gets up, waiting their turn to grab their carry on and leave the plane. Unfortunately, Soobin is ready to enter the walking lane at the same time you are. You glare at him and go first.

Meeting the others in the building you take a look around, it looks exactly the same. Everyone is chatting amongst themselves except you and Soobin, even when you grab your luggage and hail a cab to the airbnb Beomgyu booked. There were too many of you to fit in one measly cab so you hitched a ride with Kai in another one.

The house was brown and kind of small, it sat on an acre of land and was surrounded by trees. The taxi stopped before the driveway, silently telling you to pay and get out.

“I’ll pay” You announce to Kai, he stopped his attempt of plucking out his wallet to reject your offer.

Before he was able to dismiss you you handed the driver the amount that was listed digitally above the radio. The driver kindly smiled and went to pop up the trunk, you followed him to grab your luggage.

Kai got his luggage with grace, while you almost fell over. Both taxi’s drove away and now your left with your friends in front of the house you were supposed to be staying in for a week.

“Beomgyu’s gonna get lost I know it” Yeonjun complains, starting down the gravelly drive way.

You expected him to deny and whine, yet he said, “Yea you’re probably right” While eyeing the gradually dense forest.

Giggling momentarily, you take a look around as well. The entire scene looked straight from a fairy tale, mossy cobblestone lined its way to the front door and you even spotted a pond to the left of the house.

The inside was surprisingly modern though.

“I get my own room right? The question lingered in the air for a moment and the partial silence had you worried you’d have to share a room.

“Yes, of course. There’s 3 bedrooms. Soobin, Taehyun, and Me in one room. And Kai and Yeonjun in the other, which leaves you, Y/n, alone. You’re welcome” Beomgyu sing songs, smiling wide.

“I knew I liked you, Gyu” You say in thank.

The rest don’t say anything about the room plan so you don’t think anything of it, you easily spotted a hallway and decided to look down it.

“Are the rooms here?” You mutter to Beomgyu, who’s shuffling towards you.

“Looks like it, good eye”

The left wall has 2 rooms, the right wall has 1 room. There’s one room at the end of the hall, that’s the one you want. You narrow your eyes, worried you’d have to brawl for it. So as fast as you can you sprint down the wooden hallway and throw your suitcase on the floor, claiming it as yours.

The rest pick out their rooms while you examine yours, the bed is a fancy 4 post one with drapes. It immediately catches your eye, the bed has matching white and purple sheets. Even the built in curtains are white.

You also notice that the dresser, walls, and nightstands are also white. A decently sized tv is mounted on the wall parallel to the bed, the curtains that hang in front of the window across from you are the same purple the bed is.

The entire room gives off elegance and it sparks your interest. The bed draws you in and you can’t help but take a seat on the side. You’re infront of the door and can see the boys weaving out of the rooms.

“Is there seriously only ONE bathroom?” Soobin complains.

“Cry about it” You respond, crossing your legs.

His eyes flicker to yours and you hold your ground, eye contact unwavering. You might be pissed off but the way his eyes narrow at you is incredibly attractive. Though, you make sure not to let him know that. His pupils pierce through you, sending a subtle chill down on your spine.

He doesn’t say anything as he eventually turns around and leaves the hallway, your glare is directed to your legs as you calm down from the intense sexual tension.

//////

“Alright, you all have 2 hours to get ready. We’re going out to eat” Beomgyu yells from somewhere in the house. Excitement fills you as you lower to your knees to zip open your suitcase, a few things catch your eye but you ultimately choose your favorite jeans and shirt. It’s not snowing here yet but it’s still cold, a jacket would be a good touch.

Setting out your outfit on the bed you look it over and deem it super cute, now all you need is to shower and run a comb through your hair.

“I’m showering first”

You look taken aback as you realize both you and Soobin said that at the same time, a second goes by and you book it to the room. He was, unfortunately, closer and got in it first. The last thing you see before he closes the door is the smug wink he sends you.

A soft scoff leaves your mouth as you stomp your way back to your room, grumpily turning on the tv and channel surfing.

As the shower turns on your eyes subconsciously shift to the light seeping out of the bottom of the bathroom door. Soobin is naked in the shower right now, you almost smack yourself for being creepy. He’s just so UGH.

////

The creak of the door tears your attention from the TV ahead of you. Just your luck, Soobin walks out with only pants on. He briefly makes cold eye contact with you and pushes his way to his room. The warmth on your face annoys you as you get up.

It reeks of him and it almost weakens your knees. Bastard. The water quickly turns hot when you turn it, as it's already been used recently. The mirror is still fogged from Soobin's shower. Your shirt is quickly yanked over your head, your remaining clothing soon meets the sprawled-out clothing on the tile beneath you.

The water feels heavenly against you and you tip your head back. Soobin make's his way back into your thoughts and it gets worse from there. You wish he would simply open the door and have his way with you, how good his giant hands would feel digging into your sides.

Your hands pause in your hair as your thoughts race, he would look so lovely with his hair all wet while he hovers over you, completely towering over your form. How condescending he could be, how patronizing.

Squeezing your eyes you sigh and get back to showering.

/////////////

A towel is tightly wrapped around your body as you finish drying off, grabbing your discarded clothes in one hand you twist the doorknob to enter the hallway. Only to almost run into a wall, a Soobin sized wall.

Your eyes trail up from his collarbones, to his neck, and finally to his eyes, which do not meet yours. His mouth is slightly parted as he eventually meets your eyes.

His eyebrows quirk at you, "Did you hear me?"

"Sorry, what?"

He glances away from you to lean in, right-hand finding purchase on the door frame above you. His scent consumes you and it has you clenching the front of your towel. He feels centimeters away from you when he mutters, "Can you move?"

"Oh, y-yea. Sorry" You trail off, slipping next to him and bolting it to your room. You shut the door as gently as you can because your senses are heightened and you don't want to slam it.

Your lungs exhale and you take a second to breathe, snapping out of it eventually and dressing into your picked out clothes.

You bend over to grab the brush in your suitcase and rake out the tangles and knots.

"Is everyone ready? We're leaving in 10 minutes" Beomgyu yells from the living room.

They all grunt and hum as you see Kai bouncing on one foot trying to fit on his shoes. He almost trips over and it causes you to throw your head back in laughter.

You can hear his own laughing as you grab your phone and make sure it’s snug in your jacket pocket.

Your shoes are by the door and you dodge everyone who’s weaving in and out of the rooms in the tight hallway. You wonder where you’re going to eat, are the places the same here? You’re not sure but you slip on your shoes either way.

“Beomgyu, where are we going to eat?“ You ask as he passes by you, “Um, I totally forgot the name. You’ll see I guess” he continues, “ IF YOU’RE NOT READY WE’RE LEAVING WITHOUT YOU”

You have to cover your ears momentarily at his close proximity, following him when he opens the door. A car rests at the end of the driveway, just like the taxi’s from before did. Beomgyu doesn’t look back as he begins the walk of the long driveway.

Unlike him, you peak behind you to see Kai and Taehyun all ready and walking behind you, Yeonjun and Soobin are scrambling out the door, hurriedly closing it behind them.

Facing fowards again you notice the vehicle is an SUV, thankfully big enough to fit all of you. Taking 2 cars everywhere was simply not gonna cut it.

Beomgyu opens up the door and confirms everything with the driver, who is currently wearing stray kids merch. The site makes you giggle as you climb in the back, leaving someone else to climb to the very back row this time; Which happens to be Yeonjun who complains the entire time.

You’re sat next to Taehyun as he passionately plays a few rounds of rock paper scissors with Kai and Soobin. You seriously don’t know how they do it so many times without getting bored. Before you know it the suv comes to a final halt and you find yourselves in front of a sushi place.

You bite your tongue until you all exit the car.

“I thought we were going somewhere special? We can get this anywhere” You mutter towards Beomgyu’s direction; he’s currently swiping on his phone like there’s no tomorrow. Without even looking up he says, “I know but it’s right next to Dongmun market and I thought that would be fun”

You nod at his reasoning and pile into the restaurant. “Table for 6?” The hostess asks as she starts grabbing menus.

“Yea, can we get a booth too, please?” Kai speaks up. She nods and asks you to follow her.

The restaurant has people sprinkled throughout it, nothing too crazy. She leads you to a dim lit area and sets down the menus around the corner table made for larger groups. You thank her and wait your turn to sit, the table is soon filled and you are very aware of Soobin who’s sitting to your right while you’re all perusing the laminated menus.

The feeling of water is registered on your face, it feels like it’s raining inside. You lower your menu to, of course, see Beomgyu sticking his fingers in his water and flicking it at you. When he notices your stare he looks to his side quickly and acts like he’s closely examining the wall.

The water and ice are cold as you dip your finger tips into it, flicking it in his direction. You try your best to stifle the giggle that crawls up your throat when he looks at you look you just insulted him.

Now you’re basically having a competition and the other members are eyeing you humorously. Except one, Soobin glares at the interaction you’re sharing with Beomgyu and his knuckles turn white as his jaw clenches. But you don’t notice, you never do.

He clears his throat in hope of gaining everyone’s attention, “So what are you guys gonna get?” If he’s honest, he doesn’t care-he just hates how you look at Beomgyu. It almost makes him nauseous.

The two of you stop and gaze down at the menu again, “This shrimp bento box is calling my name” Kai says, smiling.

“The chicken ramen has me drooling” Yeonjun murmurs.

“Not sure yet” Taehyun and Beomgyu say.

Your answer never comes and it has Soobin turning towards you, nudging your shoulder with his elbow.

You hum at him and let out a “I’m not sure yet. This strawberry Soju looks so good though. We should let loose a little” They all agree and are quick to order it when the waiter asks what they would like, you knew they’d like that idea.

The shots are poured and the oldest drinks first, he shoots it back and cringes for a second at the bitter taste before coughing slightly. Then you all knock it back, you shimmy at the slight burning sensation going down your throat and into your stomach.

“Honestly it’s pretty good” Taehyun mumbles while wiping his lips, you hum at him and pour more. By the time you order your food you’re kinda tipsy and decide you’re not gonna have anymore. You wanna remember your first night in Jeju.

Everyone’s cheeks are reddened and it makes you laugh, until the food gets there and you borderline unhinge your jaw just at the smell of it.

You ordered spicy tuna rolls and they look so good, breaking the wooden chopsticks you dig in and groan at the feeling. Maybe a little too loud because the table stares at you, eventually noticing you wave them off and keep eating.

/////////////////

Walking out of the restaurant you really don’t feel like walking through a market right now, “Can we go to the market tomorrow or something? I can NOT walk that much right now” You sigh while rubbing your stomach and soon your left eye.

“Yea you’re right, it’s only 4pm and I feel like passing out” Beomgyu mumbles while digging out his phone to, presumably, get an uber. You don’t notice who you lean on, but you do it anyway. An arm comes to hug around your shoulders secure your position. You don’t have to look at who it is, he answers someone’s question and you can tell it’s Yeonjun.

You dig your face into his side for god knows how long, you can feel his torso vibrate when he talks and it soothes you, almost putting you to sleep. The sound of them starting to move begins and Yeonjun nudges you. The first thing you see when you crack your eyes open is Soobin’s pissed off stare, you roll your eyes and lean back on your own feet.

The car ride back is quiet and everyone settles in the living room when you get back to the house.

“I’m gonna go change, i’ll be right back” You announce, getting up from your comfy place on the furniture. They all hum but don’t rip there eyes from the TV, an episode of adventure time is playing.

The entire time you walk to your room you’re working on getting your bra off, one hand is pulling it off as you turn around to shut the door. Unexpectedly making eye contact with Soobin as you fling the garment from under your shirt. As far you see, he doesn’t react, since you only see his eyes for a second before shutting the door. You try not to think too much of it.

The comfortable pajama pants feel 1000 times better than your other pants. When you get back into the living room everyone is still in there assumed positions. The only eyes that move are Soobin’s as his gaze lingers on you before drifting back to the TV.

“What snacks do we have in the pantry?” You ask as a hand comes to lazily scratch your stomach.

“We just ate” You hear from the living room as your feet end up in the kitchen, “Yea yea” you respond.

Sushi fills you up for like 30 minutes and then you’re hungry again. The pantry opens to a plethora of different snacks. Your jaw drops and you eye some hostess cupcakes, your hand digs into the box and grabs ahold of a packaged chocolate cake.

Your eyes meet the fridge and you steadily get closer, flinging open both the fridge and freezer. A dramatic gasp leaves your lips as you see the containments. The fridge is full of fruit, snacks, vegetables and all the drinks you could imagine. And the freezer is stocked with ice cream, you quickly spot your favorite flavor of ben and jerry’s and snatch it.

Before closing the fridge you search for the utensils and grab a spoon, booty bumping the doors shut after you’re done. A content smile is placed on your face as you make your way back to the living room, finding your spot and digging into the ice cream. Your feet swing in delightfulness as you eat the creamy food.

“Where did you get that?” Kai nods at you, eyeing the food intensely.

“The kitchen is stocked full of food, they have everything” You say with a mouth full of ice cream. The boys share a glance before dashing to the kitchen, coming back minutes later with arms full of food. You laugh at them as they get comfortable again.

“What movie should we watch? And no-“

You’re cut off by a loud “SCARY MOVIES” You purse your lips, staring blanking at the men sprinkled around the sectional.

Beomgyu scrolls through Netflix’s selection while the others give off random movies they think are good. He doesn’t seem to be listening to them though, a sigh leaves your lips and you shove more ice cream into your mouth.

“You’ll be fine, if you need anything i’ll be right here” Yeonjun murmurs into your ear as he scoots closer to you. Swallowing the ice cream you peak up at him with a shy smile. You know Yeonjun is attractive, anybody with eyes knows he’s attractive. You’re just not attracted to him, Soobin has you wrapped around his pinky and he doesn’t even know.

The alcohol has almost fully worn off as Beomgyu finally decides on a movie, “The Autopsy of Jane Doe”.

It’s been about 30 minutes and you’ve already set down the ice cream on the wooden coffee table in front of you.

“Hehe she has boobs” Kai giggles as the screen pans over to the dead naked woman, you shoot a hand over your mouth in response. Trying to not let out a giant cackle, your laughing is still loud but it can’t be heard because everyone folds over laughing. Kai looks proud of his joke as he looks around giggling.

You can feel the vibrations of Yeonjun’s laugh as you lean on him again, both of his arms lay across the back of the couch as he manspreads. If you were any other girl you knew you’d be drooling, but right now you’re just appreciating your friend in his entirety.

A familiar feeling of being watched settles over you again and soon meet the harsh gaze of Soobin, a devious smirk spreads across your lips as an evil thought comes to mind. You shoot him a wink as you “get comfortable” on Yeonjun, which includes resting your head on his shoulder and wrapping your arms around his torso.

Soobin tears his eyes off of you to focus on the chips he’s scooping into his mouth. The movie might be scary but the only thing on his mind is you and Yeonjun.

////////////

The credits roll and you unhook your arms from around the man, apologizing to him about the nail marks that are no doubt in his skin from you jumping in fear. He dismisses you with a wave and a laugh, kindly taking your discarded ice cream into the kitchen along with the wrappers from his former snacks.

“Well I hate you guys for making me watch that, goodnight”

You say as you push yourself up from the couch and shuffle to the bathroom. Looking yourself over in the mirror felt good, you felt sexy if you were honest. Your hair framed your face nicely and the tired expression on your face caused a slight pout to occur on your lips.

Quickly using the bathroom and washing your hands, you leave it just as fast you came in. You decide to leave the door open to your room, you prefer to be cut off from everybody else since they’re leaving their doors open too. You turn your light on and take in your room once more. The curtains of your bed are sheer without the second layer of curtain on top of it, so after you untie the underside curtains and let them close around the bed, you can still see through it easily. The remote you tossed on your bed earlier lay next to the second pillow, the cover was off white and you hope you don’t smear your make up on it this week.

Sitting under the covers covered by curtains felt so elegant like you were a princess. There’s a creak from the hallway and you take a moment to look, Soobin walks down it. Head tipped back as a hand pushes through the front of his hair, eyes shut. Now THIS is drool worthy, the muscles in his neck stand out and you’d give anything to sink your teeth into them.

Your ogling is cut short when he looks back down as he rounds the corner into his room. Not even sparing you a glance. The lack of attention settles over your heart and pulls a frown from you. Without even thinking you shout, “asshole” before sifting through the curtain to find an opening to switch off your lamp.

////////////////

You have no idea when you fell asleep, but you do remember Soobin’s stupid sex appeal. “Sleeping Beauty’s finally awake”. You hear from the door, Soobin stands there with a smirk on his face like he just said something clever.

A tight lipped smile adorns your face as you reply, “Wow did you come up with that all by yourself?”

His face falters and you shoo him away, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes and sitting up.

“Beomgyu” You yell knowing he’ll probably hear you.

“Yea?”

“What are we doing today?”

“Horse backing riding”

Your jaw drops, you’ve never been horse back riding before, what if the horse tramples you??

How do you even dress for horse back riding? You decide on jeans and a graphic t shirt, with the same jacket of course; it’s cold as fuck. You hurry and get dressed because you know Beomgyu will leave your ass behind if you take too long.

Spritzing on some of your favorite perfume, you decide to not wear make up again. You don’t want to be left behind.

“Leaving in 30” The man of the house yells, your hair looks fine but you pat it down anyway.

“Can we eat breakfast first? I’m hungry” You whine as you walk down the hallway. You realized you’ve never actually seen the boys rooms so you decide to peak your head in, “How did you guys already make the room messy? It’s been 2 days”

3 suitcases lay hazardously opened with random items of clothing spilling out of them and onto the floor. The beds are messy and there’s shoes everywhere.

Taehyun walks past you and mutters, “Don’t judge us” Which makes you giggle and roll yours eyes playfully. “So, are we eating or no?” You question again.

“No, we can eat afterwards” Beomgyu says from the bathroom, staring intensely in the mirror as he messes with his hair. A pout settles across your lips and you whine once again, this time going to slip on your shoes.

You still have like 20 more minutes so you scroll on your phone until everyone is ready and getting into the uber.

////////////

“Hello everyone, thank you for choosing us to visit today. At the moment we only have 3 horses so you will have to double up” A plump man says, his beard has speckles of gray and he’s wearing cowboy boots. You’re not judging though.

Everyone has already seemed to partner up when they bring out the horses, one of them is all black and you naturally gravitate towards it. Seems like Soobin has the same idea as he almost bumps into you as you both step towards the animal. Before you can step away though the worker says, “Great, you two will ride Juniper. She’s a gentle giant” The worker, who seems too giddy about forcing partnership on you, says. He shows you the correct way to handle and get on them afterwards.

You don’t say anything as everyone else saddles up, “Alright you get on first” Soobin mumbles as he backs up so you have room. You shyly nod and grab ahold of the saddle hooked up to Juniper and pull yourself over her while swinging your leg to the other side. A sigh leaves you until you almost bite your tongue at the feeling of Soobin getting on behind you. Since it’s only a horse his chest is almost pressed flush against your back.

A feeling of butterflies erupts in your stomach and makes your skin all tingly. His arms reach in front of you to take hold of the lead and you almost clench your thighs before remembering the literal horse you’re on. It can’t get any worse right?

Wrong.

As the horses start up the trail, Soobin breathes into your ear and it has you gripping the saddle harshly. God, why can’t he yank you off this horse and push you up against a tree?? Is that too much to ask for?

His chest feels firm against you and you start to wonder how certain….positions would feel. Like him bending you over and pressing you into your mattress. Shutting your eyes you try and steady your breathing so he doesn’t suspect anything.

It’s so difficult though, your ass is slightly pushed against him and it takes all of your might to not push back.

“You suck at steering horses” Comes from you as you turn a corner and almost end up off the trail and into the heavy foliage surrounding you.

“Yknow, I can think of a few things your mouth would be good at besides talking”

Your heart stops in your chest as you suck in a breath, he doesn’t say anything to you after that and neither do you. You’re not sure if you’re crazy or not, but you swear at some point through the ride he pushed further into you. As well as his breathing that fanned across the spot under your ear, it has your toes curling and it pisses you off. High pitched laughter sounds in front of you, your friends are fucking around, as usual, and Kai almost falls off his animal.

Soobin cackles but it only brings a smile to your face, your underwear at the moment is sticking uncomfortably to you which dampens your mood.

You’re the only quiet one for the entire trail, scared your voice will give you away.

/////////////

You see the ranch come back into view and your shoulders visibly un-tense.

Getting off the horse was like a blessing, but yet a curse. It was nerve wracking having Soobin so close but also so hot. He gets off first and holds a hand out for you to take, there’s a glimmer of mischief in his eyes as you hesitantly take his hand and hop down. He leaves you with a wink and you’re basically running to the parking lot.

“Uber should be here in 4 minutes. We’re going back to the house to make some food because jesus christ, I’d be going broke if we only ate out” Beomgyu says dramatically.

“You’re such a drama queen” Yeonjun nudges him, Beomgyu only offers him a playful glare.

“I can’t believe we got stuck behind Yeonjun and Taehyun, their horse literally kept ripping ass directly in my face” Kai says while making a disgusted face.

A guffaw comes from Taehyun and his knees fold, he’s probably tearing up from laughing by now, he usually is. The friendly atmosphere has your mood lighting up but the uncomfy feeling in your underwear doesn’t go anywhere.

///////////

“Okay we can either have cereal, eggs, bacon, pancakes, or waffles? By a show of hands who wants cereal?”

Soobin raises his hand after a second passes.

“Eggs and bacon?”

Taehyun’s hand shoots up as well as yours.

“Okay, pancakes?”

Beomgyu raises his own hand.

“Waffles?”

Kai, and Yeojun raise their hands.

“Well….looks like we’re making everything” Beomgyu sighs, taking out the ingredients from the fridge and pantry.

The rest go to leave before a sharp, “Nice try, You, come here” He points towards you.

Cooking with Beomgyu was surprisingly easy, he was orderly and didn’t boss you around. Cooking everything took about 30 minutes and you even ran the extra mile by getting out some fruit and cutting it up, putting them in bowls across the table. Beomgyu and you look at the spread you’ve created and fist bumped, because why wouldn’t you?

“Breakfast is ready” He shouts as you take a seat at the end of the table, you hear their feet shuffling against the wood before you see them. Excited looks dotting all of their faces. “Wow, you guys did so good” Kai praises as everyone finds a seat.

“I only put out the orange and apple juice, if you guys want something else it’s probably in the fridge” You announce, taking a little of everything from the plates full of food around you. A forkful of eggs is a centimeter from your face when Soobin decides to speak up.

“Wow, Y/n. I can really tell you made these, they taste bland” He innocently smiles at you, you can tell everyone is holding in their laughs. So you smile back sweetly, “Aw, Soobin, you really know what bland tastes like don’t you? Considering your dating life, or lack of should I say?” Your smile at gets sweeter and you finally put the fork in your mouth. The laughs that were once held in break free and you worry one of them might choke.

“You guys are so cute” Taehyun sighs, playfully. Placing his hand on his heart. A frown settles on your face as you reply, “I’m trying to eat here, Tae”

Soobin narrows his eyes at his plate but continues eating anyway, occasionally taking a sip of his drink.

The spread of food didn’t last very long, you check the time and it’s already 2pm.

“Beomgyu you really need to make a schedule or something. What are we doing next? And please don’t let it be too much walking” You cross your fingers.

“I was thinking Dongmun Market once it gets dark out, but we can also go tomorrow if you don’t wanna”

“No, you guys should go. You guys can go today and then show me around tomorrow. Cuz I need some me time” You suggest.

He nods his head and continues cleaning up.

So you watch TV as everyone scurries around to get ready, you’re excited to stay in to be honest. You’ve been having tons of fun but you need a little break to recharge. An episode of The Amazing World of Gumball plays and you are invested.

“Why aren’t you getting ready?” A voice comes from besides you, it surprisingly belongs to Soobin and he doesn’t have a grimace as he talks to you.

“I’m not feeling up to it, i’ll go tomorrow” You explain. His eyebrows shoot up then furrow, “Are you sure? That’s not very safe, what if you get kidnapped or robbed?” He looks dead serious and it makes you chuckle.

“I’ll be okay, don’t worry”

His eyebrows remain furrowed and he shakes his head walking away. Well that was something.

///////////

Almost 2 hours have passed of you watching this show, you didn’t even notice it was dark until Yeonjun, Kai, Taehyun, and Beomgyu line up at the door getting their shoes on.

“Are you guys leaving already?”

“Yea, we’ll be back in a few hours. Take care of Soobin” Yeonjun teases as they all exit the door and lock it behind them.

Take care of Soobin?

Almost like he can read your mind, Soobin wanders down the hallway and into the living room in his t shirt and pj pants.

“Why didn’t you leave with them?”

“If you get kidnapped that’s going to be on my conscious for life, i’ll be okay staying here” He says as he enters the kitchen, you can hear plastic moving and the shutting of doors before he comes back out.

“Wanna order some food?” He asks, sipping from. bottle of grape juice.

“Beomgyu said we should cut down on eating out” You say matter-of-factly.

“Yes he did, but i’ll pay and technically it wouldn’t be eating out if we have it delivered”.

You playfully put a finger on your chin, tapping it quizzically while a look of thought appears on your face.

“Sure, but i’ll pay you back. What do you want?”

“Pho sounds so good, what do you think?” He asks while pressing on the vietnamese restaurant on the app.

“I’m down for Pho, gimme your phone” You lean over and tap the order you want, soon pulling back to sit in your spot again.

“Great, it’ll be here in 30” He let’s you know after putting in his order and checking out.

“Thank you”

/////////////

The doorbell rings and you have to say this was the quietest 30 minutes you’ve ever spent with him recently. Neither of you bickered AT ALL.

Eating pho was like eating pure happiness, you totally forgot where you were until you were done with it. You both sit back, hands on your stomachs as you digest the noodles and meat when your phone dings.

The screen was unbelievably bright as you bring it up to your face, faintly seeing the name ‘Yeonjun’ through your squinted eyes. The pain dials down and you click on the notification.

I can’t wait for you to go here with us, it’s not the same without you.

You giggle as you read it, Yeonjun always had a knack for making you feel included. He sends another one.

miss you 💔

A quieter laugh leaves you and this time it draws the attention of the man sitting on the other side of the couch. He eyes you suspiciously. “Who’re you texting?” He asks, trying not to sound obvious.

“Oh, uh, Yeonjun” You answer absentmindedly, tapping at your phone again in what he assumes is you texting him back. The giggling doesn’t end and he tries to not let it get to him, but he can’t help it.

“You guys are so annoying”

This time your eyes leave the screen, eyeing him incredulously. “What?”

“You heard me, you guys are annoying”

“What’s your problem? You’ve been an asshole the entire trip” Your phone lays forgotten on the cushion next to you as you turn your body towards him.

“You’re my problem, you’ve been so obvious about trying to fuck Yeonjun. It’s getting old”

You gasp at him, when did you EVER try and fuck Yeonjun? Soobin knows this isn’t gonna end well and tries to get up and retreat, but is stopped with a fierce grip on his forearm.

“Seriously what the fuck is wrong with you? I have not been trying to fuck Yeonjun”

He only watches you tell him off with an emotion you can’t describe, he looks angry but also like he’s biting his tongue.

“So, how about you put on your big boy pants and stop being such a fucking ba-“ Your sentence is cut off with a firm grip to your cheeks, the hold has your lips puckered as he brings you closer.

“You have been such a brat recently, you know that? Now I want you to apologize for your behavior”He spits as he let’s go of your mouth and you can only stare with your eyebrows furrowed. Your gaze is challenging and it only spurs him on more.

“Make me” Before you can even think, his lips are on yours, harshly might I add. His hand digs into the nape of your neck to bring you closer. You’re shocked but kiss back, you’ve always wanted to kiss him. Even if he was an asshole. He pulls back an inch to threateningly whisper, “I’m going to give you one last chance, apologize” His jaw is clenched and you almost want to give in. Almost.

“Make. Me”

You expect another kiss, not the pleasure-ful stinging of your hair being yanked. He takes ahold of the strands at the back of your head and forces you on your knees. You look back up at him in shock and slight fright, which only makes him harden more in his pajama pants.

The outline of his cock is right infront of your face and you wonder if you’re dreaming, but the delicious sting of your hair between his fingers tells you otherwise. “Brats like you always look so good on their knees” He sucks his bottom lip into his mouth as his grip on you gets tighter. Before you can protest he harshly pushes your cheek onto the outline of his cock.

“S-soobin..” You whine, finding his eyes through your lashes.

“I told you I knew a few things your mouth would be good at besides talking. Now-“ He emphasizes by tipping your head back slightly to get a good look at you. “You’re gonna be a good girl for me and suck me off, right?”

Your lips only quiver in response, “Well?” He asks, smirking at the look on your face. “i’ll be good” You say in a small voice, avoiding eye contact. The feel of him pressed against your cheek has you clenching around nothing.

His smile is patronizing, “Good, let me help you…” He trails off as he pulls you from of him, lowering his pajama pants and briefs. The view of him fisting himself directly in front of your face leaves you, shamefully, needy.

His tip is leaking and he thinks of a great idea, without a second thought he grips the back of your hair again to bring you closer. He first traces your lips with his tip, the liquid almost like a lipgloss. It’s a sinful sight and it makes him throb.

You whine as he moves to your cheek, the first gentle slap of his cock has humiliation coursing through you. It brings more warmth to your face and you once again avoid his eye contact.

“Look at that, don’t tell me you’re shy now. What happened, baby?” He condescendingly coos at you. His gravelly voice has you gripping the clothing covering your thighs.

“Please let me suck you off, Soobin” You might be humiliated but it’s oh so hot, it’s a kind of feeling that has you wanting more. He doesn’t say anything as he slyly smirks at you, “Open your mouth for me”

You take a breath and open your mouth experimentally. Instead of telling you to open more he grips your chin with his forefingers and presses down on your tongue with his thumb-successfully opening your mouth more. He groans out appreciatively at the sight. You look so pretty for him, on your knees, eyes wide and teary, mouth open and waiting.

If he wasn’t almost busting just from the sight of you he’d probably tease you for longer, but he can feel himself throb in his hand and your mouth looks incredibly inviting. The hand at the back of your head gently pushes you closer until you close your mouth around his glistening tip. His composure slips for a second at the way your tongue presses against his slit, he hisses at the pressure and stops himself from thrusting further into your mouth.

You’re guided down his length and opt for breathing through your nose. Your mouth is warm and wet and he can only imagine how good your cunt would feel wrapped around him.

“Doing so good for me, baby” He breathily praises. You test the waters and start moving down by yourself until you’re stationed at his base, nose pressed against his pubic bone. You just know you’re soaking right now. He mumbles a, “That’s it” As you pull back and go back down, your skillful appendage tongues the underside of him before you decide to hollow your cheeks.

He lets out a deep groan and can feel his restraint slipping more and more and can only watch it happen. “Baby, can I fuck your mouth?” His question is erotic and has you eagerly nodding your head. “Good girl” he praises before his other hand meets the back of your head as well. His thrusts start off soft and you try your hardest to concentrate on your breathing as to not gag.

It was in vain. His thrusts pick up speed and the feeling of him at the back of your throat causes you to gag a few times, your mouth is full of spit with nowhere to go but out. It slowly starts to drip down your lips, and then your chin. Your eyes tear up more at the gagging and now you’re full on crying because of it. And because of your tears, your nose starts to run. It feels dirty and it only eggs on your arousal.

Right now Soobin’s head is thrown back, noises of appreciation tumbling out of his mouth as he tries to hold back his impending orgasm, but all the spit in your mouth is creating a delicious feeling and the second he looks back down at you it’s over for him. You look like a whore and it’s only for him, not for Kai, not for Taehyun, not for Beomgyu, and NOT for Yeonjun. It’s for him.

“Gonna cum, baby. Right down your throat and you’re gonna swallow all of it. Got it?” He lets out between his clenched teeth.

You can only groggily moan and the vibrations tip him over the edge. His pace stutters before he holds you down at his base. The feeling of his cum painting your throat and some of your tongue is almost like a reward. He eventually pulls out his softening cock and looks at you with expectancy. So you swallow it and stick out your tongue to show him your obedience.

His hands drop from your hair, one goes to your cheek to sweetly thumb away the tears while he tucks himself back in his briefs and pulls up his pants. He kneels so he’s level with you, “Did so good for me baby, knew you would” He says before kissing you again, it’s slippery but so addicting. With a hand he helps you up, motioning you to follow him; presumably to your bedroom.

You were right as you approached the door at the end of the hallway. He opened it and motioned you inside, giving a gentle shove to your chest so you landed on your bed. He straddles you, both of your legs in between his. His right hand lands right beside you while his left holds your waist as he leans down.

“You did so good for me, you get a choice. You can get my fingers, my tongue, or my cock” He watches your expression closely, you bite your lip in arousal and thought.

“Please fuck me, Soobin. Need to feel you, need it so bad, please” Your heavy breathing makes your begging so much hotter and he couldn’t possibly deny you.

Before anything, he helps you change positions and move up to the pillows so you’re on the bed correctly. “Let’s get these clothes off of you shall we?”

He brings his lips down to yours and licks your bottom one, tongues meeting for the first time. It causes him to groan and grip your tongue with his teeth, soon sucking on it before pulling away. He leaves another short, but hot, kiss then pulls back completely.

His nails skim your torso as he lifts the shirt over your head and it causes goosebumps to blossom. The bra you’re wearing pushes your cleavage up and it called to Soobin, he wanted to cover you in his love bites. Have everyone know who you belong to. But that could wait, he needed to feel you.

He unclasps your bra and kisses a trail between your breasts down to your waistband, all while his skillful fingers tease your nipples. His hands feel amazing on you and you curse yourself for not doing this sooner.

Sadly he has to retract his hands to push down your pants. He gazes at your panties and licks his lips, his thumb meets your clothed clit and you sharply inhale. The sound goes straight to his growing erection, he continues his movements while you subtly grind into him.

Whining at the loss of contact as he removes his thumb to slip your underwear down your legs. You’re fully naked under him and it makes him grow even stiffer in his briefs. He yanks his shirt over his head and you ogle him, his toned stomach on display along with the very same neck muscles you were swooning over from before.

He gets his pants and briefs down quickly and settles in between your legs, throwing them over his shoulders to make it easier.

“Ready for me, baby?” He hotly question, pressing erotically into your core. You clench as his tip hits your clit and you frantically nod, “Need it so bad, Soobin”.

The initial stretch stung, it was uncomfortable until he bottomed out. The stretch turned into pleasure-filled pain and you whine at it. He slowly gets to moving and it’s addicting, the feel of him so close to you and in such intimate places has your head reeling.

Opening your eyes-that you don’t remember closing-you stare at him while he concentrates on the feeling if you wrapped so nicely around him. His hair is beginning to stick to his forehead and his lips are swollen, there’s a euphoric look on his face and it has you clenching around him. He groans at the tight squeeze and moves your legs to his hands-pushing them against your chest.

“Soobin-fuck-you’re so deep” You mumble out, panting. He smirks at you and rolls his hips. “My girl is so so good for me, letting me fuck this perfect fucking cunt”.

His sinful words bring you closer and you know you don’t have long.

“Guys, we’re home!!” You hear from the front door, along with footsteps and mumbling. You and Soobin stare at each other, your eyes are wide and fear fills you. He smirks as he leans over to untie the curtains on your bed.

“Answer them” He mumbles into your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses.

“What? Soobin, I can’t do that” You point out in awe. His expression doesn’t change.

“Do. It”

You eye him anxiously and sigh.

“Welcome home” You manage to get out.

“Where are you guys?”

You curse Beomgyu for being so social, “I-“ You’re cut off by a thrust, albeit, a slow thrust, but still a thrust. He works himself into you and still expects you to answer. The way he looks at you tells you to not question him, “I’m getting ready for bed. I’m not sure where Soobin is”

Your voice is beginning to become breathy again, you wish you could tell him off but the way he rolls into you and presses into your clit has the complaints dying in your throat. He whispers into your ear, “Being such a good whore for me, taking my cock so well while you talk to our friends”

“We have dinner by the way” A moan is at the tip of your tongue and you suck in a deep breath before speaking, “I’ll be out soon”

The look Soobin is giving you would normally piss you off but it only feeds in to your current fucked out state. He looks smug but so attractive.

The thumb on your clit rubs faster and in sync with his thrusts, in a hushed voice you warn him, “So close Soobin”. He nods at you and leans down to invite a nipple into his mouth, it’s all too much and the fire in your torso becomes hotter and hotter.

Biting your lip harshly, you feel him twitch in you. The action sets you off and you clench around him. He really doesnt feel like being teased for having sex with you so he leaves your nipple with a wet pop and kisses you. Swallowing the moans he knew were going to spill.

The feeling of coming around him has your senses overwhelmed and tears running down your face. He fucks you through it the quietest he can and feels his own orgasm close in. The fucked out look on your face matched with knowing all the guys are here and the door to your room isn’t even closed has him stuttering into you.

The thing that has him coming undone is your begging, “Want you to come in me so bad, please. Give it to me, Soobin” It’s almost silent but has him thrusting deeply inside of you, stilling, and digging his nails into your waist. The slight feeling of him coming inside of you is new but very welcomed. His eyes are clamped shut and his are eyebrows are furrowed, he looks so good you wish you could take a picture.

He waits a second to catch his breath and smiles at you before he pulls out and hurriedly picks up your clothes off the floor without being seen by the others, he throws them to you and dresses himself. Before he leaves your room he stretches a bit and hypes himself up. He steps into the hallway and pretends like he didn’t just dick you down.

“Soobin, there you are. Where’d you go?” Yeonjun says, patting him on the shoulder.

“I was taking a nap, sorry” He replies nonchalantly.

“Well, eat up we brought ramen” Kai yells from the dining table.

——————————————————————————

tag list: @loverhyunn @tyunslut @soobmin @kyrkitten @rencarnationofangel

if i forgot you in the tag list or you want to be added please let me know either by sending an ask or messaging me<3

#soobin smut #soobin x reader #soobin x you #txt smut #txt x reader #soobin hard hours #txt hard hours #txt x you #kpop imagines #kpop smut #kpop x you #kpop fanfic #soobin fanfic

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softtdaisy · 1 year

Text

SAVIOR - PETER PARKER

DESCRIPTION I peter will always love you and protect you, specially from your new guy who seems to hate him

PAIRING I tasm!Peter Parker × fem!reader

WORD COUNT I 2,9k

A/N I i was watching Wednesday and I have the biggest crush on Xavier and there is this episode where he is the scars on his neck??? yep the inspo comes from here. I hope you will love this story ❤️

It was a quiet Friday night. The week was over, you’ve done all your homework for your uni classes and you were in front of your favorite tv show. Nothing could have prepared you for what was going to happen.

At first, you noticed a shadow behind your window. You thought it was just you being paranoid about living alone. You knew from a pretty good source that the city wasn’t as safe as they want to make it look. But when you gave it another look, you knew for sure that you didn’t hallucinate the first shadow. Your heart missed a beat and you promised that you were going to kill that stupid idiot if he wasn’t in a bad shape already.

“Peter!” you whispered loudly when you opened your window. And of course, your best friend gave you this sweet and flirty smile that only him can gave. It wasn’t the first time he was coming at your house late at night, oh hell no. But he always managed to scare the hell out of you. Which was super ironic considering he was wearing his spiderman suit, meaning he was supposed to save you from the scary thing outside. Not be one.

Peter put a hand through his hair before placing his elbow against your wall, looking like a model posing for a picture. “I know you miss me today, baby.” You could tell he had a pretty long day from his broken voice. You haven’t seen Peter at all today. You usually eat together at least one time a day but sometimes his missions keep occupied all day. But as soon as he can, Peter always managed to come see you. Even if it’s three in the morning and you’re already sleeping.

“I fucking hate you right now, Parker. Get in.” You heard him laugh while you got back in your apartment. When you turned around, he was already taking his suit off. Good things you always had some clothes for him here. There were some good things in dating your now best friend in the end.

You and Peter dated for a year, during your first year of high school. Maybe you were too young to understand how love was supposed to feel like. During the summer, you decided to break up to focus on your friendship. You kept saying you were soulmates and that you didn’t want a heartbreak to make you hate each other. You were jealous when Peter started to date Gwen during your last year. For the first time, you felt like Peter was slipping through your fingers. What if she was the one for him and you never had to live the best romance trope when you would both fall in love with each other again in a few years?

Because deep down, you always felt like you would get back with Peter one day. It was meant to be, you knew that. But the only question was when? Were you ready to wait your whole life just to feel Peter’s lips on yours again? To have his hands exploring your body like it was the most precious piece of art he ever got to touch? To his beautiful eyes looking at you and giving you all the love, you deserved? You kept thinking about that at night sometimes.

But even if Gwen left after high school for London, making her and Peter break up, there was still one cloud in the horizon: your best friend was New York favorite superhero. And let’s be honest, it wasn’t the best option to have peaceful relationship. Being Peter’s best friend was already threatening enough. He didn’t want to risk having you as his girlfriend and losing you.

And from this lack of attention and love, you started to give your heart to other. That’s how Spencer entered your life. More than a classmate, he became your friend from day one. It felt normal to start seeing each other when you realized you had so much in commons. You weren’t dating officially; you wouldn’t call him your boyfriend. But it was enough for your best friend.

And just like you were jealous of Gwen, Peter was terribly jealous of Spencer. You were not stupid, you knew he always managed to be occupied to avoid him when you proposed to go out together.

When you came back in the living room, Peter looked at you, frowning. A quite funny picture considering he was wearing only his boxer. A quite hot picture too, you had to admit. “You’re alone, right?”

“No, my clients of the night are waiting in the bedroom. You want to participate, Parker?” you said with a flirty smile. That was when you realized your outfit wasn’t the most appropriate to welcome someone at home. Of course, it was only a pajama but your short ride up and Peter could easily see your thighs entirely if he wanted to. Nothing he never saw but still. So, you tried to pull it down discretely after throwing him some clothes.

“No. I meant, no Spencer tonight?”

Beyond being jealous of him, Peter was sure Spencer wasn’t sincere. As soon as he met him, Peter kept saying that something wasn’t right with Spencer and that he must be hiding something. Of course, you believed his gut and tried to see what could be wrong with your partner. Turns out nothing was, and you stopped looking for clues that didn’t exist. Peter wasn’t happy with your decision. But he accepted it and kept looking for something individually.

“Nope.” You saw the way Peter’s look changed with just this single word. Nobody was there. And no one would come. It was just you. And him. If you wanted to. He started to make some step towards you, still in his underwear while your hands were still on your short. “No, Spencer.” You finished answering right when Peter was just a few millimeters away from your face.

You could feel his breath against your lips, and you were dying to taste them again. Peter’s eyes couldn’t leave you. They screamed attraction and desire. He wanted to do so many things to you. “Maybe tonight is the night we can try some things again then…” he whispered, bringing a hand to your cheek. You loved the way his thumb was brushing your skin so slowly it became sensual. Especially when it moved slowly to your mouth, and he started caressing your lips.

That was how you knew Peter would always be the one. You were ready to throw everything away for one kiss. And that was you did when you put your arms around his neck to bring him closer and close the gap. Peter didn’t waste any second and put his arms above your butt to lift you up. Your back was now against the wall, your legs around his waist and your lips lost against his. Maybe it was the waiting that made the kiss so good. Or you both just got better.

When you caressed his back, you felt some big scars and immediately looked at it. You couldn’t contain the gasp that escape your lips when you noticed those three massive wounds. “Oh my god Peter, what happened?” you asked. But he was too busy kissing your neck to answer you. And you almost gave up from the way his lips felt against your skin. Almost. “Peter. Parker.” You said, hitting him behind his head after each name. Which made him sigh, obviously.

“I got attacked tonight. That’s why I was there in the first place before your legs seduce me.” He offered you his magic smile before giving you a kiss. “Let’s take care of that after, ok? I need to take care of that first.” He said, getting back to the kiss. His hands started to lift your shirt and you knew that you wouldn’t be able to argument more.

Nothing could have made you stop kissing Peter right now. Not when you could feel him growing in his underwear and his skin getting hotter from all the desire, he had for you. No. Nothing.

Except one thing.

Three knocks on your door. “[y/n], it’s me. Spencer.”

You didn’t expect him to come. And Peter could tell by your expression. Spencer knew you were alone tonight, and it wasn’t that surprising that he would come here to see you. And it wasn’t like you could lie about your presence: everyone could see the lights from your window.

You quickly left Peter’s arms and pushed towards your bedroom. “Go hide there. I’ll make him leave.”

“Hide your bedroom? While your boyfriend is here? Damn, [y/n] that sounds like a strange way to propose a threesome.” He excepted the hit on his arm when he talked, but he still managed to laugh about it. “Parker!” you groaned before finally pushing in your bedroom for good.

You put a hand in your head, trying to look at least a little presentable when you opened the door. “Hey you.” You used this innocent tone you always have when you’re hiding something. Like the boy you were kissing seconds ago hiding in your bedroom.

“I won’t bother you for long, I just wanted to check on you.” You felt bad for Spencer. He was so sweet for coming here late just to make sure you were alright. And when he kissed you softly, your mind couldn’t focus on anything else than Peter’s lips. And how better they tasted.

You let Spencer come inside, offering him a drink while he was telling you about his night with his friends. He gave you names that you didn’t remember hearing in the past. Or maybe you weren’t paying much attention. And clearly, you weren’t either now. Otherwise, you would haven notice immediately when he stopped talking.

It wasn’t after a few seconds of you whispering for yourself that you noted the silence in the room. “Spence?” you asked, frowning and coming back to the living room.

To see him with holding the one thing you almost forgot was there in the first place. To your defense, you tended to forgot Peter was Spiderman for your own good. It was way too stressful and you knew that if someone started to say mean thing about him you would defend him. Like a true best friend. So yeah, you didn’t expect to see Spencer holding the Spiderman’s suit in his hand.

“What’s this?” he asked, like it wasn’t obvious. And you wondered why you should feel guilty since you were one of the few people who knew about Spiderman’s identity.

“A suit. For…a costume party.”

You didn’t think this would work out perfectly. You didn’t think Spencer was stupid enough to believe you blindly. But you didn’t think he would get that mad.

“You really think I’m a fucking idiot?” You never heard get mad before. But it wasn’t the only reason you felt in danger. There was something different here. You tried to walk away but stumble on your table and ended up on your butt. Did it hurt? Yes. But not as much as realizing you’ve been wrong about someone for so long. “Where is he?”

You wanted to play dumb, asked who he was talking about. But he didn’t give you the time. “Where is Parker!” he yelled, throwing your vase and the flowers bouquet inside right on the floor. You protected your face like you were going to be hit. But it got worse. Because you didn’t get hurt, no. Because when you looked back at Spencer, he wasn’t there anymore. Instead, there was a kind of monster mixed with a werewolf standing in the middle of your living room.

And for the first time, you understood why Peter said being with him could be that dangerous.

“Tell me where he is.” At each word, Spencer was taking a new step to you. And right before he was facing you, you heard your door opening in your back. You had no idea if you should be relieved to know Peter was there to save you. Or scared that in the end, he was the person Spencer was looking for.

“I knew your ugly face reminded me of someone when I saw you tonight.” You heard Peter say. You turned your head and wasn’t surprised to see him in his suit, compared to Spencer who seemed to confuse. A few months ago, Peter asked if he could keep one here in case something happen, and he can’t get back to his place. You hide it in your wardrobe, behind all your old clothes. You were glad that he never had to use it, it meant he was always in control. But tonight, he didn’t have another option. You couldn’t help but think it was because of you.

“But I should have known it was you when you were too stupid to end me down there.” And that’s when it clicked.

“You tried to kill Peter?” you asked. Or reproached him, more exactly. Which resulted in you being grabbed by the throat. You could feel his claws almost piercing your skin and the tears growing in your eyes from the pain.

“Yes, I tried to kill your perfect stupid best friend that is so love with you.” His voice was nothing like the one you used to hear. Spencer had this soft deep voice that you loved. Now it had this deeper almost incomprehensible tone that you hated. The way the word love sounded in his mouth was disgusting and it was even more awful to think he used to talk about Peter.

You could feel Peter moving in your back which resulted in Spencer increasing his grip around your throat and you having difficulties to breath correctly. “Let her go. This is between me and you.” But of course, Spencer just laughed at Peter’s request. You didn’t except more from the bad guy.

“That would be too easy, Parker.” You could feel yourself getting higher, your head almost touching your ceiling. To say you were scared would be a euphemism. You wished you could back to when you were peacefully kissing Peter. “You had the city; I had the girl. Let’s make a deal.”

You couldn’t see Peter’s face, neither could Spencer with his mask on. He had never been more anxious that he was right now. The idea of you getting hurt, or worse, losing you was killing him slowly. If he wasn’t sure about his feelings for you, now he was. Because he was ready to sacrifice every single thing just to make sure you were alright. “Let her go.” He repeated. “I don’t fucking care about anything else, just let [y/n] go.”

“Peter, no…” but your voice died in a sigh when Spencer squeezed your throat so hard that you couldn’t breathe. You closed your eyes to endure the pain.

Next thing you knew, you were in Peter’s arms, laying in the middle of your living room. You jumped. You immediately imagined the worst scenario. Did Spencer killed Peter and left you with him there? From the mess you could see, something bad happened while you were unconscious. And you couldn’t see Spencer, which, you thought meant that he had win. It wasn’t until you felt Peter’s hand on your shoulder that you realize things were maybe not that bad.

“He’s gone.” He simply said. You turned your head to look at him and put a hand on your mouth to contain a scream. Peter had scratches on his face and neck, and you could easily tell he had some on his body too. You slowly brought your hand to his face, and he cuddled against it. “He won’t be a problem anymore, I promise.”

Peter told you briefly what happened after you lost conscious. Spencer threw you on the floor, like you weren’t important anymore. While Peter checked on you, Spencer started attacking him and that’s how the fight started. They ended up on your rooftop and Peter quickly understood that he would be a fight for their life. He hated that. Peter almost thought people deserved redemption or, at least, punishment and not death. But he had a hard time believing in this for Spencer. Then he jumped on Peter. And after he avoided him, Peter didn’t get the chance to catch him before he fell. “I have no idea how he managed to, but he wasn’t dead after this fall.” He sighed, brushing your hair slowly. “The cops were down there so I explained to them how he had attacked a girl living there and I saved her life. They took him and… well, I don’t care what happen next for him.”

This was a lot to accept and the only reaction you had was to hold Peter tightly. You almost lost him tonight, for good. And there were no way you were going to live another day in this crazy life without having him as your boyfriend. You were going to kiss him when he took your face between his hands. “Please, the next time you try to forget about me, don’t take a werewolf. This shit hurts.” He complained, pouting.

You laughed and hit his arm. “There won’t be a next time, as long as you don’t make a mistake Parker.”

“I’ll be careful about that.” He replied before finally letting you kiss him. Ready to finally end the night the way you were supposed to at the beginning.

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