#bts hoseok fanfic
Text
Into Oblivion
Pairing: Hoseok x Reader
↳ 4k / Angst
Summary: Hoseok can’t remember anymore, fragments of his memories simply scattered. It leaves him with nothing, unable to recognize faces or locations and it’s not long before he’s left stuck, sinking into oblivion. That’s when you step in, the only person that is able to solve the mystery that is him.
⇨ Amnesia (noun.); a gap in one’s memory
Warnings: graphic violence, depictions of blood, mentions of illness - disclaimer: there will be medical inaccuracies, please take them from a story standpoint.
GIF credit.
His head hurts. A lot.
It’s throbbing and pulsating through the crane of his skull, pounding relentlessly. His body is quivering, a pool of red encasing around him. He tastes copper in his mouth, a few drops falling down from his temples and onto the ground.
The sirens around him are blaring, threatening to split his eardrums in half. Flashes of red and blue are going off, people are murmuring and whispering as he can barely muster the energy to look up, a deep groan escaping him instead.
His eyes flutter shut and he’s plunged into darkness, mind shattering into pieces.
“...–should be right this way.”
Your heels click against the ground, a white coat enveloping your shoulders and fingers wrapped around a clipboard. Your eyes trace around the vicinity, noticing the stench of disinfectant and the white walls right away.
You were never a fan of hospitals – but fate seemed to have other plans for you.
“Here we are.” The nurse before you smiles, her arm extending into the room on your right. You courteously thank her and she departs, leaving you standing alone before the door.
Sucking in a deep inhale, your hand wraps around the knob.
The bright lights flash before your eyes, slowly dimming down until you’re greeted to a white room. It’s entirely empty, save for the bed off to the far side. A young man sits up on it, dressed in a light blue gown. His back is hunched over and there’s a distant look to his eyes.
You walk over slowly, noticing how he barely reacts to your entrance, not even lifting his head.
“Hi.” you breathlessly say, a soft smile curving on your lips. “Jung Hoseok, right? It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”
You reach out your hand, but you’re only granted silence. Hoseok is still staring down at his lap, gaze fixated down.
He answers after a pause.
“Who are you?” There's no intrigue in his voice, just simple disdain. However, you lower your hand, smile not once fading.
“My name is Y/N.” You introduce. “I’m Dr. Choi’s assistant, the doctor that has been looking after you.”
Hoseok doesn’t answer you, choosing to focus his gaze back onto his lap again. You take that as a cue to walk to the far corner of the room and grab a chair, placing it next to his backside.
Seating yourself down, you pick up your pen and lean back, facing your clipboard.
“Would you be comfortable if I asked you some questions?” You ponder, watching him throw another glance at you before slowly nodding
You take up the opportunity whole-heartedly. “I’ve been informed by Dr. Choi that you have been suffering from…retrograde amnesia.” You say the words cautiously, “Is this correct?”
Hoseok sighs, before nodding. “And it was a result of severe head trauma? From a car accident?”
he nods again, pursuing his lips.
“How long has it been for you?”
“One year.” He states and you nod, but then he adds in– “With no sight of recovery so far.”
“Let’s try to hope for the best.” You implore, writing down on your clipboard. “Have you been experiencing any symptoms other than memory loss?”
Headaches. – he wants to say, but at this rate, he can’t remember if they were like the same pounding one he had during the accident.
“No.” He states, noticing you write down the little tidbit from the corner of his eyes.
He chuckles underneath his breath, and you snap your head up.
“You’re wasting your time here.” He scoffs, “I already know….there’s no cure for me.”
Hoseok’s not stupid. He’s lost his memories, but he can still observe, still notice the regard in with Dr. Choi addresses him with.
He’s hopeless, and it’s something that’s become more and more apparent as the days have passed by.
He finally looks up to glance at you. He’s expecting a lot, either frustration or apathy.
Frustration from his lack of willingness. Apathy towards his fed up attitude. Maybe even shock, considering you heard so much of him from Dr. Choi.
But as Hoseok glances at you, he finds nothing but concern dwelling in your eyes. A reaction that shakes him to the core.
He watches as you set your clipboard down completely, redirecting all your attention onto him.
“Hoseok…” You mutter quietly, a little too tenderly. “I know this is difficult and that you’ve been through a lot, but we’re here to help…here to help you.” You whisper the last part, tapping his hand, “You’ll overcome this.”
Hoseok doesn’t want to believe it. He’s heard it all at this point – that he’ll be better in no time, that he’ll be able to go back to his previous life. But it’s all been wrong, complete lies that took his time and spun it into an entire year.
If anything, you could be lying to his face now, giving him the false perception that things were all okay, when in reality they were far from it.
But as Hoseok continues to gaze at you, there’s something comforting within your gaze, something almost reassuring, something filled with so much hope.
It deeply unsettles him.
***
Hoseok doesn’t greet you with disdain the next time you visit.
Instead, he still sits quietly on his bed, sheets pulled up to his torso and hands fiddling in his lap. But his gaze isn’t concentrated on them.
His eyes survey you instead, the curiosity dwelling in them being unmistakable.
“Hi.” You warmly greet him with a smile, slipping into your chair. “How has your day been going?”
“It’s been fine.” He states, watching you bring your clipboard up again.
“We can continue where we left off yesterday.” You explain, “You had mentioned that there were certain things you could still remember?”
He hums, “It’s limited…very limited.” A huff escapes him. “I can remember some basic facts, like my name, and my age. But some things…are just completely out of my scope.”
“What do you mean?”
Hoseok hesitates, lips not moving to form an answer as your question lingers in the air. But his next words hold the weight of the world.
“My parents, I…” He breathes out. “I-I can hardly remember them.”
Your eyes widen. While it wasn’t completely uncommon to forget faces and locations, Hoseok seems completely withdrawn, an anguished look reflecting within his eyes.
He squeezes his eyes shut, trying to force the words out.
“They came the other day…” He confesses. “They kept asking how I was feeling, or if I had eaten on time. They were talking to the nurses, asking for any updates about my condition, but–”
He grimaces.
“What is it, Hoseok?” You press forward, and his voice trembles.
“I had just asked – “Who are you?” – and it gave me enough of an answer.”
You silently watch as Hoseok shakes his head, trying to rid himself of the thoughts. You knew his parents hadn’t come to visit him before, that they were advised that he needed time for his treatment. Perhaps they thought it was a better opportunity to do so now, that he could potentially recognize them or indicate that he was getting better.
But you can only imagine them taking a foot into the room, expressions filled with so much love and concern, only to see Hoseok’s blank expression and void eyes staring back.
“They were disappointed.” You state and he nods.
They had come for their son, only to have left without seeing him at all.
He darkly chuckles. “Just like anyone else that tries to visit.”
You watch dejectedly as he plants a hand against his temples, rubbing the area as he winces. Putting down your clipboard, you rise from your seat and stick your head out from the door. Hoseok doesn’t seem to notice much, only surprise emitting from him when you hand him a bottle of medication and a glass of water.
“The nurse outside gave it to me.” You clarify, “Told me it helps calm headaches.”
Hoseok slowly nods, recognizing it as medication he’s taken before. He takes it from your hands, downing it with the waterwith a low muttered thank you.
You decide to tread on other areas, hoping to avoid the topic of his parents altogether for now.
“What about other things?” You question. “Anything else you still remember?”
“I can remember where I live…” Your eyes spark, watching him attentively. Hoseok recalls parts of his residence, a big and spacious apartment within a complex.
But he also recalls stumbling into it a couple weeks after his accident, nothing in it appearing familiar. It was as if he had stepped foot into someone’s home, someone he doesn’t recognize.
“And?” You question hopefully.
He lets out a deep sigh. “–and nothing. Nothing came to mind.”
It's terribly frustrating. How much he’s kept pushing and pulling, only to have no recollection surfacing in his mind. How he was told that he lived in this one place for years, but stood in the centre of it with completely blank eyes and just mere confusion.
And of course – just how much it’s hurting the people around him. It’s moments like this that dip him into dread, having lost everything through the blink of an eye.
You observe him with sullen eyes, long forgotten to write down on your clipboard.
“Memories…” You quietly begin, watching him lift his head to stare at you. “They’re something everyone takes for granted. Not realising just how important they are.”
Hoseok’s eyes turn somber, and you continue. “I don’t think the best course of action is to remember.” - you’ve long forgotten how to – “I think it’s for you to see these past memories as pieces of information, focusing on them almost as if you were creating new ones.”
Hoseok grows silent, watching you carefully. If he were to take a step away completely, cut these memories away like strings attached to him, and merely observed, taking them in as simple knowledge rather than trying to equate each one to himself and his lack of memories, maybe, just maybe, he could take them in as new memories, rather than past ones.
It’s not something he would have ever tried before, too stuck on an accident that happened months ago. But for once, he wants to try.
He wants to get better.
“Okay…” He breathes out, making eye contact with you. “I…I want to try, Y/N.”
Hoseok isn’t expecting much, but when your eyes widen and there’s a huge smile breaking out onto your features from his response, he can’t help but feel a bit lighter.
***
The next time Hoseok sees you, he finds you in bit of a disarray.
You walk into his room, your white coat hanging off of your shoulders. Your chest heaves up and down, hands tightly clutched around onto a thermos.
Hoseok is baffled when you glance up, throwing a bright smile in his direction.
“Here.” you say, placing it beside him on his table. His eyes flicker down at it, before gazing at you in utter confusion.
“What is it?”
“Oh, it’s herbal tea.” You clarify but upon seeing his expression, you continue to explain. “I ran into your mother on my way in here.” A grimace runs through you, “She thought it’d be best if I was the one who gave it to you. Said it was your favourite.”
Dread runs through Hoseok at the thought. He supposes it was still hard for her to see him after their last encounter, but he’s stricken with the fact that she’s still looking out for him.
However, he’s grateful. You didn’t need to listen to her request, could have easily bypassed her and made your way down here. Instead, you took upon the opportunity to oblige, acting as sort of a messenger between the two of them.
“Thank you.” Hoseok quietly mutters, “You didn’t have to do this.”
“I wanted to.” You state within a heartbeat, giving him a tender smile that has Hoseok’s eyes widening. You reach over, pouring him a cup and handing it to him, before sitting back down in your chair and bringing your clipboard back up in your hands.
He snaps out of his daze, moving to bring the cup to his lips to take a cautious sip. It’s extremely fragrant, wafting through the air. But it's pleasant, reminding him of a home.
“It’s good…really good.” He whispers, “I don’t remember exactly, but I think I can understand…understand why I liked it.”
You watch as he continues to drink it and for once, you finally see something surface on Hoseok’s expression. It’s something you haven’t been able to uncover for so long, masked with a thin layer of uncertainty and mixed in with deep doubt.
For once, there’s hope on Hoseok’s features.
The corner of your mouth curls up, warmth flooding through your gaze. You blink, tearing your gaze away from him and having to remind yourself of your task at hand.
Feeling the smooth ridge of your clipboard, you raise it back up.
“Ready to start our session for the day?”
Hoseok nods, and you begin your trail of questions.
***
His mind stays in the same state. His memories have gone astray, slipping through into fingers and forever gone.
Yet, Hoseok strains. He refuses to allow the non-existence of them to continue to plague him, attempting to pick up from the pieces he’s left with.
But the efforts aren’t only coming from him.
You present new information to him, replacing what he had once lost. You bring various photographs, get him familiar with names and places, picking up his scattered bits one by one to make him whole again.
It’s incredibly hard. Hoseok gets frustrated, one too many times. But you stay with him, ushering him to understand who the people in the photographs are, and understand why their relationship was so integral to him. You help him understand a version of himself he barely knows existed, giving him reassurance and encouraging words.
He learns to appreciate you, a sentiment he previously didn’t really quite share with your superior. And it might help that he finds you a tad bit endearing at times.
“Y/N.”
“Mm?” You look up from your clipboard, pinning the remaining photos to it.
“I think…” He squints. “I think your coat is upside down...”
“Is it?” You blink wide-eyed, setting your board down before twisting and turning, attempting to catch a glance at the back.
Sure enough, a tag sticks out, much to your own horror.
“Oh no–” he watches as you get up, hurriedly attempting to flick it off your shoulders. A chuckle escapes him at your baffled expression, holding the coat up in your hands several times before finally understanding to revert it.
You freeze all together, impassibly staring at him. His voice subsides, eyes catching on your gaze.
“What?”
“Oh.” You shake your head, flushing. “It’s nothing.”
You awkwardly clear your throat, throwing the coat back properly onto your shoulders and slipping in next to him. Your cheeks still burn, something that has the corner of Hoseok’s mouth curling up.
“We should really get back to–”
“Do you like coming here, Y/N?”
“Huh?” You ponder, observing his features. Hoseok tilts his head, smile still evident. “O-Oh, I do. I want to see you get better, Hoseok.”
“And what about you?”
Your brows raise, “What about me?”
“What about…your life?” A soft smile curls on his lips, “It seems like you’ve seen everything about me, my memories, my thoughts….but I hardly know about you.”
Your mouth parts, but he continues, letting his mind go astray, “What your life is like, the kinds of memories you have….” He looks away avertedly. “If you have someone….”
Hoseok bites his bottom lip. He probably shouldn’t have let that last thought slip out of him. He knows you’re here to help, that you’re here to just simply ensure that he gets better with time. But he can’t help but feel close to you. Can’t admit that he looks forward to your visits, that you make him feel comfortable when he’s been in a state of imbalance for so long. That you make him feel alive again, a feeling he can hardly remember.
He feels close to you, but it's something that makes you crumble.
Sheer dread encompasses your features, and Hoseok feels a deep ache in the middle of his chest.
“I-I don’t….” You avert your eyes, voice low, “Relationships don’t always work out for me.”
Hoseok’s eyes widen, “As for my life, it’s nothing too interesting.” You mention with a mutter. “I just started working here recently with Dr. Choi, after working in an office for a year.”
Hoseok hums, processing your words. But you raise your clipboard, moving on to asking him another question.
All Hoseok can do is answer you as usual, but he doesn’t notice the deep crack in your demeanour.
You’re gone.
The days pass by, and his door remains wide open. Save for the nurses occasionally checking in on his vitals and replenishing his IV, there are no traces of you and it makes his heart sink to his stomach.
He shouldn’t have asked you those questions, shouldn’t have prepositioned about your life. You, first and foremost, were here to do your job and Hoseok internally curses at himself for forgetting about it, wondering what you could possibly think of him now.
There’s a soft knock at the door and he instantly peers up, heart racing. However, disappointment washes over him when it’s not your familiar smile greeting him.
A tall man stands at the door, a white doctor’s coat thrown over his shoulders and a clipboard in hand. Hoseok recognizes his stern look, eyes flicking over to his name badge that reads ‘Dr. Choi’.
“Jung Hoseok.” He states, scribbling down on his papers before looking up with intent. “I’m here to assess your condition.”
Hoseok nods, having gone through this countless times. The man asks him questions pertaining to his memory, making him feel more interrogated than anything else, and then for any updates, before glancing at his treatment plan and leaving.
“The amnesia is still present, yes? With no significant changes?” Hoseok nods, the man not even glancing at him once. “Your treatment is focusing more on retaining information. How is that coming along?”
“It’s coming along good…” His mind flashes to you, chest tightening. “Your assistant has been helping me a lot.”
The man hums, merely going over a checklist before him. “Any newly developed symptoms?”
“No.”
He hums again “I’ll continue to monitor your condition. The treatment plan seems to be working in accordance.” He looks up for the first time. “Yungwon will come in tomorrow for you.”
“Yungwon?” Hoseok questions, a deep furrow to his brows “What about Y/N?”
“Y/N?” He nods. “Were you not informed?”
“Informed of what?”
Dr. Choi deeply exhales.
“Y/N has resigned. She is no longer working underneath me anymore.”
***
The news has hit Hoseok like a ton of bricks.
No information. No way of telling him yourself. No presence of you.
You had left without giving him a mere goodbye. Simply left him on his own as if he wasn’t your sole target of focus for the last couple of weeks.
You had disappeared. Leaving him in the dark once again.
The days pass by and Hoseok is introduced to the man named Yungwon. He’s placed in the misfortune circumstance of having someone continuously probe at him again, except this time, he’s much more inclined not to let them in, even as the man continuously insists.
Hoseok has always been regretful of not being able to remember. But now, now he’s just tired of trying to.
There’s a soft knock at the door.
Hoseok looks up sluggishly, half-expecting either Dr. Choi or Yungwon to pop up with inquiries and questions for him, but the air leaves his lungs completely when he's face to face with you, surprise evident in your eyes.
“Y/N.” He calls out, scrambling up immediately. This time you’re dressed in casual clothes and although with no added white coat, there’s still a clipboard still in your hands.
It takes a minute for you to find your voice. “Yungwon’s not here…?”
Hoseok blinks, caught off guard. You glance around, before downcasting your gaze. “I should go find him…he needs these.”
“Y/N.” Hoseok calls out again, a bit more desperate and he notices how you pick up on it immediately.
You finally stop in your tracks, looking at him properly. Hoseok looks the same after all this time, but the pure anguish in his eyes makes your stomach churn.
“You left.” He states heavily. “You didn’t say anything to me, not even a goodbye.” His voice trembles, a lone tear slipping down his eyes. “Am I so undeserving of that too now?”
It’s all mixed in together – his hurt, his anger. How much he wants to lash out, but instead crumbles.
Hoseok’s eyes widen when there’s a pair of arms encircling around him, hugging him tightly. He is shocked to the core when your clipboard is abandoned against his bed, thick tears spilling from your eyes as your form trembles.
Your notes are sprawled upwards, laid open to his observant eyes which only grow in size.
Hoseok barely has a chance to react when you’re already pulling back, frantically wiping your tears away. He can only watch when you grab your clipboard again, heading towards the door.
“Wait! Y/N!” He loudly pleads, but you keep moving forward, not looking back once.
His heart is racing, pounding against his ears. His line of vision was greeted to all the photographs you had used in his session – except there was one that he never saw, one you never were able to use.
It was a photograph of you in his arms, a bright smile on your lips as he kissed your cheek.
You reach the door and Hoseok attempts to find the IV on his arm, ready to wrench it off. But you are halted suddenly, by the voice of one of the nurses that spots you by the door.
“Oh, Mrs. Jung!”
Hoseok’s blood freezes and he watches as the surprise floods your features, form turning frantic. Your eyes avert around, dismay enveloping them when they make apprehensive contact with his own, and he sees it all.
Your gazes were always tender, your words always comforting. You felt so familiar, making him forget all about his repressed memories. But amongst all this, you also left out one crucial fact.
You had never told him your last name.
He watches in horror as the corners of your mouth curl, contrasted with the sheer anguish in your eyes. There’s a crack within your demeanour and he can’t unsee it anymore.
You leave before Hoseok can see the fresh tears sliding down your cheeks.
#hoseok fanfic#bts hoseok fanfic#hoseok angst#hoseok amnesia au#jhope fanfic#bts jhope fanfic#bts jhope angst#jhope angst#jung hoseok#bts jung hoseok#bts amnesia au#bts imagines#bts scenarios#bts angst
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Name: Ghost Hunting AU (doesn't have a name yet)
Ships: Namgi (Namjoon/Yoongi), 2seokkook (Hoseok/Seokjin/Jungkook) + side Vmin (Taehyung/Jimin) - BTS
Rating: Explicit
Category: M/M
Wordcount: TBD (so far ~16k posted but big writing thing it's from is 165k+)
Type: Twitter Thread AU (posting scenes as separate threads and adding information to the side with questions and also has some interactions with readers for suggestions or answering questions!)
Tags: crack, fluff, smut, angst, friends to lovers, fuckbuddies, fuckbuddies to lovers, strangers to friends to lovers, ghost hunting AU, survival horror (no one dies though), ghosts, pining, literal sleeping together, hurt/comfort, injuries, youtuber!JK (and youtubers!BTS after a while), near death experiences, trauma, healing, exorcisms, all the fun ghost stuff and more!
Warnings: Main one is Graphic Depiction of Violence as well as trauma responses. Can find more TWs and CWs on this post.
Summary:
Namjoon and Yoongi used to have a ghost hunting channel. Due to an event that neither want to ever talk about again, they leave everything behind and vow to never get back into ghost hunting again.
Years later, they break that promise to find out the truth about what happened back then.
[This is also based on the game phasmophobia! You do not really need to know anything about the game, but if you do, it adds a little plus. I also post information about the game and how it interacts with the AU, as well as other worldbuilding stuff, info on the characters and more here! Oh, and here's the thread with just the story threads. I also posted a pre-story 2seok smut for this AU on AO3 and will post more smuts from this universe on AO3 probably.]
#ao3#ao3 fanfic#ao3 tags#ao3fic#bts ao3#bts fic#bts fanfic#bts yoongi#bts yoongi fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts jhope#bts#bts agust d#bts agust d fanfic#bts hobi#bts hobi fanfic#bts hoseok#bts hoseok fanfic#bts j hope#bts jeongguk#bts jhope fanfic#bts jimin#bts jimin fanfic#bts jin#bts jin fanfic#bts jungkook#bts jungkook fanfic#bts namjoon#bts namjoon fanfic#bts ot7
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Favorites Rec List 3
More of my favs -> Thanks to all these incredible writers for making my day a little better :))
Kim Namjoon
Stretch you out (@chateautae)
A little bit in love with you (@joonbo)
Mr. masseuse (@lavenjoon)
"Let me take care of you" (@mintelepathy)
Fantasies (@sweetwritertanya)
Kim Seokjin
24/7 Marriage counselor (@jimlingss)
A better grip (@jinkookspencil)
A helping hand (@jjungkookislife)
You again (@gashinabts)
Soarin' (@aquagustd)
Seokjin's ho ho ho (@yoongsisbae)
Jealous (@youtifulhobi)
Sacrifices (@justcallmenikki7)
Influence (@aquagustd)
Min Yoongi
Back burner (@yoonpobs)
Escapism (@yoonlattesworld)
Finding home (@helenazbmrskai)
Strawberry icecream (@euphoricfilter)
When I needed you (@dreamescapeswriting)
The cockpile: love birds (@httpjeon)
Crescendo (@ugh-yoongi)
Apricity (@delightfulserendipity)
Jung Hoseok
All it takes (@yoongiofmine)
Nibbling it (@jjksblackgf)
The promises we keep (@vyduan)
Your body is an artwork (@borathae)
Maybe the first, but not the last time (@euphoricfilter)
Park Jimin
Oh so reluctant (@back2bluesidex)
Pretty like you (@axigailxo)
Serendipity (@angellesword)
Blowing dandelions (@httpjeon)
All I need (@joonberriess)
Apricot (@vminity21)
Triads and tribulations (@rendaze)
Star light, star bright (@readyplayerhobi)
High school sweethearts (@choiwrites)
Taste of little (@maliby)
Cherry king (@jiminrings)
Turning to stone (@jjungkookislife)
He makes you insecure (@kookiesbuckethat)
Kim Taehyung
The art of touch (@chateautae)
Nude (@btssmutgalore)
Triads and tribulations (@rendaze)
Match made in heaven (@beenbaanbuun)
"I'll take care of you" (@guqwrvte)
Library kisses (@kwanslvr)
Jeon Jungkook
Way Back Home (@solemnreads)
Stretch you out (@chateautae)
Seven Days (@bonny-kookoo)
Jock!jungkook (@joonberriess)
Tracing your tattoos (@btsugarush)
Shades of red (@thatlongspringnight)
Pu$$y fairy (@angelguk)
Idealizations concerning real life relations (@venusiangguk)
Little blue pill (@dreamescapeswriting)
Brown eyed baby (@jeonstudios)
Superstar (@jinkookspencil)
Spicy n' sweet (@thvhoe)
The ability to fathom (@hanniwrites)
Bad omega, sweet omega (@helenazbmrskai)
"I couldn't live without you" (@jungk0oksthighs)
In my eyes (@axigailxo)
"Besties for the resties?" (@jessikahathaway)
You're leaving me (@delukoo)
Love; weakness (@akinnie75)
Bloodline (@jjkeverlast)
Greek god (@bonny-kookoo)
Size kink (@lavenjoon)
Ex on the beach (@beahae)
Off-league (@hansolmates)
Accidental roommates (@jjkeverlast)
Good girl (@bonny-kookoo)
Crazy (@kookiecrumb)
Curious boy (@jinkookspencil)
Confident (@h0neypjm)
Still perfect (@cupoftaae)
OT7
Trouvaille (@spookyserenades)
A comforting hand (@purpleyoonn)
Abundance (@angelicyoongie)
Appreciation (@vminizzle)
Reaction: faking orgasms (@dreamescapeswriting)
Mean kitty, soft kitty (@purpleyoonn)
Best of us (@bts-trash-blog)
You belong (@imnotlauriane)
(If you have any recs pls share, especially for Hobi, Jin, & Rm :))
#writing#bts namjoon#bts v#bts jin#bts suga#bts x reader#bts smut#bangtan#namjoon#jimin#taehyung#run bts#bts jung hoseok#bts jung jungkook#bts jungguk#bts jungkook#bts recs#fanfic#fanfic rec
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. . • ☆ . ° .• ° kinktober masterlist
31 days of smut let’s get it °:. *₊ ° . ☆.
please read the warnings for each chapter!!
･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.
☆ day 1 ~ taehyung: breeding kink
tags/ warnings: pwp, unprotected sex, breeding kink, baby talk (but no actual kids because yuck)
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 2 ~ : jimin: pet play
tags/ warnings: pwp, pet play, ass play, fingering of both holes, butt plugs, mild dumbification
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 3 ~ jungkook: thigh riding
tags/ warnings: pwp, thigh riding, cumming untouched, implied use of recreational drugs (weed)
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 4 ~ hoseok: somnophilia
tags/ warnings: pwp, somnophilia, consensual drugging, oral (f. receiving), unprotected sex
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 5 ~ yoongi: praise kink
tags/warnings: pwp, oral (m. receiving), praise kink, vaginal fingering, cum swallowing
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 6 ~seokjin: corruption kink
tags/ warnings: pwp, corruption kink, he’s a little condescending too, just jin teaching you how to touch yourself?, fingering, cumming untouched
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 7 ~ namjoon: double penetration
tags/ warnings: pwp, use of a dildo (the ones that have a hole for fake cum), double penetration, unprotected sex, creampie x2 ?, squirting
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 8 ~ jungkook: size kink
tags/ warnings: pwp, unprotected sex, creampie, size kink, he’s hung okay? whatever you’re thinking make it bigger— he has a fat cock, belly bulge
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 9 ~ taehyung: watersports
tags/ warnings: pwp, watersports (pee), cumming untouched, literally wet and messy
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 10 ~ jimin: cock warming
tags/warnings: pwp, unprotected sex, creampie, cock warming
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 11 ~ hoseok: oral fixation
tags/ warnings: pwp, fingers in mouth!!!! (lets gooo), oral (m. receiving), cum swallowing, subspace, condescending dom hoseok!!! (lets gooooooo!!!)
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 12 ~ yoongi: overstimulation
tags/ warnings: pwp, vibrator, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, squirting, minor oral? (f. receiving), unprotected sex
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 13 ~ seokjin: creampie
tags/ warnings: pwp, unprotected sex, creampie, cum kink, lil spanking action
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 14 ~ namjoon: face sitting
tags/ warnings: pwp, touched on insecurities, face sitting, namjoon’s a munch, grinding, pleasure dom joon
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 15 ~ jungkook: fingering
tags/ warnings: pwp, fingering, a singular slap to the pussy, squirting, cumming untouched, cum swallowing? sort of? cum is ingested basically, all very lighthearted and fun
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 16 ~ taehyung: spit kink
tags/ warnings: pwp, spitting in a mouth (yum?), wet and messy, unprotected sex, creampie
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 17 ~ jimin: mirror sex
tags/ warnings: pwp, unprotected sex, fingering, exhibitionism? kinda, they just fuck in a public gym, the panties stayed on, finger in mouth !!!!
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───
☆ day 18 ~ hoseok: squirting
☆ day 19 ~ yoongi: free use
☆ day 20 ~ seokjin: spanking
☆ day 21 ~ namjoon: voyeurism
☆ day 22 ~ jungkook: exhibitionism
☆ day 23 ~ taehyung: knotted dildo
☆ day 24 ~ jimin: role play
☆ day 25 ~ hoseok: primal play
☆ day 26 ~ yoongi: shibari
☆ day 27 ~ seokjin: vibrator
☆ day 28 ~ namjoon: cum stuffing
☆ day 29 ~ jungkook: pantie kink
☆ day 30 ~ taehyung: belly bulge
☆ day 31 ~ yoongi: mask kink
#bts smut#bts fanfic#bts fluff#bts kinktober#jungkook smut#jimin smut#taehyung smut#hoseok smut#namjoon smut#yoongi smut#seokjin smut#bts x reader#jungkook fanfic#jimin fanfic#taehyung fanfic#namjoon fic#seokjin fanfic#yoongi fanfic#bts#hoseok fanfic
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Jingle All the Way Collaboration
Coming your way this holiday season! Whether you've been naughty or nice, you'll have seven fics to unwrap by @kpopfanfictrash , @leahsfavefics , @kithtaehyung , @yoonia , @cybrsan and @sugaurora.
All second chance romance. All holiday themed. All attempting to utilize the same quote: "The holidays aren't so bad with you around." Come down the chimney, embrace your inner Vixen, and warm up this season with the Jingle All the Way collab!
Content Creator: all amazing banners are made by the truly spectacular @kithtaehyung!!
(Links to be added as fics are posted)
Title: The Ten Days of Ex-Mas
Author: @kpopfanfictrash
Pairing: Jimin x Reader (f)
Rating/Genre: M (18+); angst, fluff, smut; hockey player au, second chance au, oh noo there was only one bed
Summary: Three months following the worst break-up of your life, you finally feel ready to start moving on. The world, it seems, has other ideas when you pick up the phone and find your ex-boyfriend calling.
Jimin Park, star right winger of the NHL and (until recently), the love of your life, has a very large problem. Despite the courage he regularly shows on the ice, in his personal life, Jimin is kind of a coward. When you broke up this fall, he could barely admit it. Not to his neighbors. Not to his friends. Not even to his family, who are expecting him home for Christmas. In a desperate plea for more time, Jimin begs you to pretend you’re still dating – and to his surprise, you agree. Faced with a second chance, Jimin is determined not to squander it. If only fixing a relationship were as easy as falling in love.
Posting Date: December 19th, 2023
Title: All I Want for Christmas is Joon
Author: @leahsfavefics
Pairing: art historian!Namjoon x art historian!reader (f)
Rating/genre: m (18+) angst, fluff, smut, second chance au
Summary: You have had a rough year following the mutual break up with your grad school sweetheart. On a whim, you book a spontaneous trip to Europe for the holidays to help get you out of the funk you’re in and assert your independence. It would be great, if it weren’t for the fact that you keep bumping into your ex boyfriend.
Posting Date: December 21st, 2023
Title: Back to December
Author: @kithtaehyung
Pairing: Seokjin x Reader(f)
Rating/Genre: M (18+); angst, fluff, smut; brother’s best friend au, wedding au, second chance au
Summary: Ever since you left town to pursue your dreams, life has fast forwarded into one big blur. so when you hit pause to attend your brother’s wedding exactly three years later, your brain instinctively resets and rewinds. because you have to spend it with the very person that had been there at the start. the one person you regret leaving behind.
Posting Date: TBD
Title: A Christmas Fix
Author: @yoonia
Pairing: Taehyung x Reader(f)
Rating/Genre: M (18+), secret baby au, s2l au, fake dating au on the side (more on that later)
Summary: One-night stands are supposed to be nothing more than just. It shouldn’t have involved seeing those two red lines looking back at you weeks later without a name or a contact number linking you back to your mystery man. Nothing more but his face. The unforgettable face that would sometimes appear in your dreams at night. So unforgettable that you immediately recognise him the moment he walks into your family home at Christmas, hand-in-hand with your older stepsister.
Title: Everwinter
Author: @kithtaehyung
Pairing: Yoongi x Reader(f)
Rating/Genre: M (18+); angst, fluff, smut; ex-fwb 2 lovers au, second chance au
Summary: You told him you loved him, and that was a mistake. Because years later, you both meet up with your old friend group for a holiday trip, and neither of you have forgotten that.
Posting Date: TBD
Title: Miracle of the Season
Author: @cybrsan
Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Rating/Genre: M (18+); angst, fluff, smut; angel au, second chance au
Summary: Cast out of Heaven after a painful betrayal, you find yourself having to navigate the intricacies of human life without any guidance from the Creator or the family you have always known. Things only get worse as the holiday season reaches its peak, with reminders of the life you left behind everywhere you look. Just when you think things can’t get any worse, a familiar face pops up and you aren’t sure whether to consider it a blessing or a curse.
Posting Date: December 29th, 2023
Title: A Porn Star's Guide to the Holidays
Author: @sugaurora
Pairing: Hoseok x Reader(f)
Rating/Genre: M (18+); smut; second chance au
Summary: Jung Hoseok was your first love, a relationship that ended only because your post-high school dreams led you down two very different paths. Yours brought you to Jeon Jungkook, an innovative talent agent promising to produce the most well-loved adult entertainment artists of the era. And that’s how you became an erotic market darling, doing just about everything from outdoor gangbangs to golden showers and a long list of kinks in between.
Ten years later and you’re ready to find a new path, celebrating your exit from the business with one last appearance at the biggest adult industry convention of the year. Only when you arrive, you find yourself unexpectedly face-to-face with your high school sweetheart. Suddenly, you’re forced to confront where the years have taken you and feelings that may have never quite gone away.
What’s a former porn star to do?
Posting Date: TBD
#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts smut#bts series#bts au#bts holiday#seokjin fanfic#seokjin fic#namjoon fanfic#namjoon fic#yoongi fic#yoongi fanfic#hoseok fic#hoseok fanfic#jimin fic#jimin fanfic#taehyung fic#taehyung fanfic#jungkook fic#jungkook fanfic
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You go to an illegal underground sex party downtown and meet seven guys who fuck you too good.
Contains: Riding, missionary, crying tears of pleasure, pussy DP, overstimulation, mid air fucking, wall fucking, blowjobs, mention of other people having sex, rough sex, slow sex, y/n loves sex, anal with mention of it hurting before it feels good, one sentence of it ‘hurting good’, squirting, disassociating cause it feels so good, squirting, multiple members cumming in y/n, vibrator being used on y/n
Admin note: this is so fucking long, enjoy ;)
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Jin
“Am I your first tonight?” The man, whose name tag said ‘Jin’ asked.
“Yeah.” You nodded. “First time being in this kinda place too.” You internally scolded yourself— why did you have to tell him that?
“You are beautiful.” He commented.
You laughed softly.
He smiled.
The two of you were alone in a small room. There were some sex toys and bondage equipment on the wall, and a massage table in the middle of the room. It was dimly lit and had a soft and sensual feeling to it. You were sitting on the older man’s lap on the red couch, his hands already exploring your body. You could feel his hardness beneath you.
“I’d love to see you ride me. Do you think you can do that for me, sweetheart?” Jin asked as he started to kiss your neck.
“Yes.” You breathed out.
Moments later, the both of you were undressed. “Mm, so big!” You shuddered as you pushed down on his length, his fingers squeezed into your sides as he guided you down.
Once he was all the way in, you placed your hands on his chest for balance as you started to ride him. He let out a groan, his hands roaming up and down your body, before finally cupping your breasts. He sat up and wrapped an arm around you, kissing your chest and sucking on your nipples. You held onto his head and kept riding him.
The older man started to thrust into you, and you cried out. His pace quickened, and his other hand found its way to your clit. He rubbed your sensitive bud, and you started to lose yourself to the pleasure.
You whimpered and moaned, the sound of his hips smacking against yours echoing through the room. In the distance, blaring music was heard, and it sounded like the couple next to this room were having a go at it as well.
“I’m so lucky to be the first to pound into this pretty pussy… you feel so good around me, baby.” He grunted, slowing down his pace to savor the moment.
You couldn't form any coherent thoughts, your body was buzzing, and your skin was tingling. Your nails dug into his back, and you were sure you left marks on him.
“Come here…” He nudged you off his lap. “Go lay down for me, mm, just like that.”
You laid on your back, legs spread apart. He moved himself between them, he held onto his shaft as he entered you again, slowly and teasingly. He watched as you writhed underneath him, his hand snaking down to your clit once more.
You arched your back, the sensation was almost too much to bear. His cock filling you up and his fingers circling your sensitive nub. The man had a devilish grin on his face, enjoying the view of your body wriggling under him. He started to thrust faster, his hips pounding against yours, his length going deeper and deeper.
Jin leaned down and pressed his lips against yours, his tongue slid into your mouth, and you gladly sucked on it. His other hand was on the side of your face, keeping you in place.
It was almost suffocating, the weight of his body on yours, his tongue dominating your mouth, his shaft buried deep within you, and his fingers stimulating you.
Your moans were muffled as the man above you kissed you, his hips not slowing down.
Jin let out a muffled grunt as he spilled into you, and you felt excitement rush through your body at the idea of him filling you up.
“Your cock feels so good! Mmm, please don’t stop. You feel so good inside me, fuck!” You winced, biting down on your bottom lip as you neared your release.
The man above you gave you one more hard thrust and rubbed your clit roughly, pushing you over the edge. You came, your body quivering as he continued to move inside of you, helping you ride out your high.
He slowed his pace, his length slipping out of you. He groaned as he rubbed himself, before he came all over your belly.
Yoongi and Hoseok
“Ah! Ah!” You winced, squeezing your eyes shut. Yoongi’s pace was slow, and the way he slowly filled your pussy drove you insane. Being filled up inch by inch was an amazing feeling. Your pussy stretched, but it felt so good. When you felt something poke against your cheek, you opened your eyes and saw a hard cock in your face.
You parted your lips and took in Hoseok’s cock. You moaned, sending vibrations through his cock. He groaned and tangled his hand in your hair, holding your head as he pumped in and out of your mouth. You sucked on him, hollowing your cheeks and using your tongue to lick and tease him.
Yoongi continued his slow thrusts. You clenched around him, wanting him to go faster. Instead, he just chuckled, enjoying your whine when he pulled almost all the way out and went back in. He teased you, slowly filling you back up. Your whine was cut off by Hoseok pulling out of your mouth. He rubbed the tip along your lips and you kissed it, letting your tongue slide against the head, before he pushed it into your mouth again. Hoseok’s hand roamed to your breasts and he started kneading it and pinching the nipple. You gasped and arched your back, pushing your breast further into his hand.
Yoongi continued his pace for a little longer. You could feel yourself getting closer, your walls tightened and your moans grew louder. His pace was torturous, it wasn’t enough. Just when you thought you couldn’t take anymore, his hips snapped into yours, burying himself completely inside of you. Your legs trembled and you could feel your orgasm coming.
Yoongi leaned down and nipped at your ear, before whispering, "I can feel how close you are. So fucking tight. So fucking perfect. You're being such a good girl."
“Gonna cum…” You cried out, letting go and releasing. Your legs shook as pleasure coursed through your body. It was a long orgasm, the feeling lasting.
Yoongi grunted, his hands holding you tightly. He fucked into you faster and faster until his hips stilled, a warmth spread throughout you.
You both were breathing heavily, trying to catch your breath. You felt Yoongi pull out of you, and Hoseok took his place.
You giggled when Hoseok pulled you closer and picked you up, and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders before you leaned in to kiss him. You gasped into the kiss as you felt him slide into you.
Hoseok moaned. You were already wet from cumming, so he was able to slide in easily. His pace was quick, desperate. His hips were slamming into yours, the sound of skin slapping filling the room. A few couples were near you, fucking each other. You didn't know them, but that just added to the experience. You loved how public sex was accepted in the club.
Yoongi's cum dripped out of you, down your legs. Your wet pussy and Hoseok’s saliva covered cock made such hot sounds. The squelching noise was loud, and you blushed, loving how lewd it was.
“Mm, fucking another man while filled with cum already, you are so dirty," Hoseok smirked, heading to the wall and pressing your back against it as he started to wall fuck you. Your back rubbed against the cool wall, and you closed your eyes, taking in all the sensations. Hoseok was a rough lover, and his thrusts were so hard and fast that your head kept banging into the wall.
“Fuck, fuck…” You whimpered, feeling how sensitive your pussy was. You had just came, but it was so good. Hoseok was making you feel amazing.
“Fuck, you take this cock like a champ.” Hoseok was pounding into you, the sound of your bodies hitting against the wall was loud. It turned you on. You knew others would hear and look over. You felt Hoseok reach one hand between your bodies, and you looked down, watching him rub your clit.
You clenched around him and felt another orgasm build up inside of you. You threw your head back and squeezed your eyes shut. Hoseok's thrusts were rough, the way his fingers moved on your clit was rough, it all felt too good. You felt so sensitive.
You cried out, your second orgasm washing over you. Your legs trembled, and if Hoseok wasn’t holding you up, you would have collapsed.
“Oh, oh!” You whimpered when you felt Hoseok continuing to fuck into you. The pleasure was becoming too much. He was going too hard. You needed a moment to recover, but it felt so good. It hurt, it was too much, but it felt so good.
“Going. To. Fill. You.” Every word that rolled off his tongue was followed by a hard thrust into you.
"Ple-ease, oh, oh!" Your eyes widened and your toes curled as he released inside of you. His cum mixing with Yoongi's. It felt warm and full. You panted, catching your breath, and let your body go limp in Hoseok's arms. He held onto you, his cock still buried inside of you, before pulling out.
Namjoon
“Yes…” Namjoon grunted, head tilted back, his tongue resting over his bottom lip as he slid his cock in and out of your ass. His fingers were in your mouth, keeping you from speaking, you sucked and licked them, moaning around them, your own fingers clutching at the bedspread, trying to stay grounded against his hard thrusts.
The muscles in your body tensed and flexed, the pain from being stretched so wide mixing with pleasure that came when he pushed all the way in, your entire body tingling as you rocked with his hips.
Your toes were curling, you tried to moan around the fingers in your mouth, he kept the pace of his thrusts steady, a hand on your hip holding you still.
This all felt so dirty, you never would’ve thought that you’d let a man fuck you like this, but it felt so good, so intense.
Your pussy wasn’t lonely, Namjoon had pushed a vibrator in it. The buzzing sent waves through you, made the experience even better.
His fingers slipped out of your mouth, you gasped for air, feeling him shift his weight slightly. He gripped both of your wrists with one hand, keeping them locked behind your back, his other hand wrapping around your neck, squeezing as he pushed in deep.
You whimpered, your hips moving on their own, pushing back into his cock. You were losing control of your body, it felt so good, your pussy was clenching and quivering.
“You love having some stranger be the first, don’t you? Taking that cock so good, I’d think this wasn’t your first time, so fucking good. Get on all fours.” He was breathing hard, voice raspy, his words sending chills down your spine.
You scrambled to your knees, letting him move you, pushing your upper body down into the mattress. His hands gripped your hips, he pulled almost all the way out and slammed his cock back in.
You screamed, it felt so good, a deep throb of pleasure, you clutched the bedspread, your back arching, a whimper leaving your lips.
He fucked you hard, grunting with each thrust, you felt every inch of him inside you, every time he hit bottom it made you shiver, your mouth hanging open as you moaned and panted.
“Harder, harder!” You begged.
You were going to cum, you were right on the edge, you needed him to make you go over.
His fingers were in your hair, he gripped it and yanked, making your body bend, he thrust deep, your body tensing up, you bit your lip.
His fingers were around your neck again, his body leaning over yours, his chest on your back, he fucked you fast, hard, making the bed bounce.
You felt his breath on your cheek, a hand cupping your breast, a thumb flicking over your nipple.
It was too much, you were moaning, body convulsing as you came. He was still fucking you, hard, you couldn’t breathe, it was so intense, too much, but so good.
He was panting and groaning, his fingers squeezed your neck, you felt his dick swell inside you and then he came.
A loud, long groan, his cock twitched and filled you up, you shivered, feeling it leak out and run down your thighs.
Your body was weak, you felt him release your hair, you slumped down onto the bed, chest heaving, a thin layer of sweat coating your body.
A stranger took your anal virginity and you loved it.
Jimin
“Mm, just like that.” Jimin cooed as he placed a hand on your head, his eyes filled with lust as he watched you take his cock deeper and deeper.
He was sitting at the edge of his bed, and you were on your knees in front of him, pleasuring him with your mouth, your hands resting on his thighs for support.
You looked up at him with his dick in your mouth, and his eyes met yours. He smirked, running his fingers through your hair and tugging on it gently. You hummed in response, and you could feel the vibration of your throat against the tip of his cock, causing him to buck his hips, making you take his entire length. You gagged a bit, and he smiled, his hand still holding your head.
You soon moved to the bed, and he wanted to watch you ride him, so he laid on his back and watched you climb on top of him, his cock throbbing with need.
He watched as you hovered over him, taking his cock and rubbing it against your clit. You moaned as you rubbed him against your most sensitive area, and he could feel you getting wetter and wetter by the second.
Finally, you couldn't take it anymore. You positioned yourself, and slowly, you sank down onto his cock, moaning loudly.
You stayed like that for a moment, enjoying the feeling of being filled. “Your cock is so hard, filling me so nicely, feels so good…” You whispered as you placed your hands on his chest, and then you started moving.
Jimin watched as you moved on top of him, the sight of your tits bouncing turning him on even more, and the noises coming out of your mouth were music to his ears. His hands gripped onto your hips, pushing you down harder as you moved.
He was so deep inside of you, and the friction from his dick rubbing against your walls was making you dizzy. It didn't help that the room was starting to fill with the smell of sex, which only made you more horny.
Soon, the two of you were fucking hard, and the sound of your skin slapping together mixed with your moans and whimpers.
“Mmm…” You whimpered, circling your hips before you started to bounce again.
“Fuck, you’re so hot.” Jimin breathed out as he reached up to cup your breasts, his thumbs rubbing against your hard nipples.
Your eyes fluttered closed as his touch sent sparks throughout your body, and you started bouncing faster. You weren’t sure how long you were riding him for when he stopped you. He pushed you down onto the bed, pinning your hands on the mattress before he wrapped his fingers around yours.
His body was pressed against yours, his cock buried deep inside of you, and he began to pound into you, hitting that spot inside of you that made your toes curl. You couldn't stop moaning and writhing beneath him, and he loved watching you become undone.
The pleasure was so intense that you thought you might pass out, but then he started rubbing your clit and you knew that you wouldn’t last long.
He leaned down and started kissing your neck, his tongue gliding along your skin. You tilted your head back, exposing more of your neck, and he took the opportunity to start sucking and biting it.
“You are hitting it just right…” You moaned, and he groaned against your skin, thrusting harder.
After a few more thrusts, he could feel his climax approaching, so he released your hands and sat up, pounding into you hard, his hands holding onto your ankles to spread your legs apart further.
You watched as his chest heaved, and his abs glistened with sweat. The look in his eyes was primal, and you knew that he was about to cum.
“Fuck, the way your pussy clenches around my cock, fuck, can’t get enough of you, babe, love fucking you like this, mmm, gonna make me cum.” Jimin’s hands now moved to your sides, holding you into place as he picked up the pace.
You reached up and grabbed onto his arms, digging your nails into his skin. The sound of his voice, the feeling of him deep inside of you, and his words, all brought you closer and closer to the edge.
Suddenly, your whole body started to tremble, and you felt a surge of heat run through your veins. You came hard, and you couldn't help but moan loudly.
Your walls clamped down around his cock, and he couldn’t hold back anymore. He came deep inside of you, groaning and growling.
When the two of you came down from your high, he collapsed next to you. He pulled you close and wrapped his arms around you.
Taehyung and Jungkook
Your hunger for cock was insatiable. Five cocks had already pounded your pussy, and you thought you were satisfied, but when one good looking man named Taehyung hit on you, followed by another good looking man named Jungkook, you felt your body ask for more.
Your head was tilted back, resting on Taehyung’s shoulder as you bounced your body up and down his cock, riding him. He gripped your hips, moaning your name, his face in your neck as his thick member slid in and out of your wet pussy.
The two males weren’t done with you just yet, Jungkook and Taehyung had taken you into multiple positions, you had sucked both of their cocks, and yet here you still were. Their staminas were amazing, and you couldn’t ask for a better way to end the night.
“Do you think she can take two cocks, Kookie?” You heard Taehyung ask his friend, who was sitting back and lazily stroking his dick while he watched the two of you fuck.
You gasped and pulled your head up, looking at the both of them in shock. Two? They wanted to fuck you at the same time?!
"Can you?” Jungkook asked you, and you felt both their eyes on you.
You had never had two cocks in you before, but you were so horny, you needed them, and you had a feeling that this would be the last thing you wanted to do tonight.
“I want to try, I want both of you in me, please." You begged, and the two males chuckled, they found you adorable and hot at the same time.
"You heard her, let's go Kookie." Taehyung said, spreading your pussy with his fingers. “Is this your first time?” He asked.
“Yes…” You nodded.
He chuckled.
"Good. You deserve two big cocks for the first time." He teased, and kissed your neck.
Jungkook positioned himself in front of you, and rested his one hand on your thigh while his other held his length into place as he pushed himself into you, making you gasp.
Your hand went over your mouth, and you felt him stop, waiting for your cue. You looked over at him, nodding for him to keep going.
“O-oh…” You whimpered as your pussy was filling with two cocks instead of one. It was an odd feeling, and you closed your eyes, focusing on the pleasure you were feeling.
Jungkook leaned in and captured your lips in his, kissing you deeply as he pushed into your dripping cunt, helping your body get used to the size of his cock.
“So full, so stuffed, ah!” You whimpered, desperately trying to grasp onto anything. Fuck, you felt like your pussy was stretched to the max. Their cocks felt so amazing, you squeezed your eyes shut and gritted your teeth as you felt Jungkook push further into your pussy.
Your walls were being spread as far as they could go, and it was so damn amazing. You didn’t even realize that something like this was possible, oh fuck, they were stuffing you so nicely.
You had only gotten a taste of what it was like to have two men fill you up at the same time, and now you were addicted.
Jungkook paused when he managed to fill you with his every inch, and the two men started to kiss you against the face, switching up from your face to your lips as they allowed your pussy to get used to the large intrusion.
After a few moments, you opened your eyes and nodded, letting them know that it was okay to move.
“O-oh!” You shuddered as Taehyung started, moving in and out of you in a slow pace.
His hands were wrapped around your waist, and your body was pushed back against his, allowing him to thrust up into you while you were sat on his lap. Jungkook followed a few seconds later, when Taehyung slid out, Jungkook slid in, and one and off they followed this same rhythm.
You couldn’t even close your mouth, drool dripping down the side of your lip as they fucked you. You could feel them, oh fuck, you could feel them hitting the deepest parts of your body, and it was making your body tingle. The drool fell on your chest, a puddle collecting.
“You like that? Dirty girl?” Jungkook purred.
You couldn’t even talk, you could only answer with a moan.
"You like having two cocks in your little slutty cunt, huh?" Taehyung added, licking his lips.
Oh fuck, yes, you loved it, you couldn't explain how much you were enjoying this.
You closed your eyes and focused on the feeling, feeling their large dicks move in and out of you, making you feel full, so very full.
“Doing so well for your first time, your body was made to take two big cocks at the same time, isn’t that right baby girl? So fucking sexy and slutty for us, yeah?"
“Love two cocks in my pussy, mmm, love it so much." You whimpered, throwing your head back as they started to go faster.
They switched it up this time, now they both pounded in and out of you at the same time, fucking you hard and deep. You were shaking, gripping the sheets as they pounded away at you, fucking you hard enough to make you scream.
The bed rocked under you, the mattress creaking as you were fucked hard by the two guys.
They didn't slow down, not one bit, and your screams were so loud that people from the next room could hear, and you didn't give a single shit. You had two cocks in you and it was the best experience ever.
You were a mess, you were dripping, soaking the bed with your juices, and your body was twitching with pleasure, oh fuck.
Taehyung took a break while Jungkook pounded into you, and he leaned forward, pressing his lips against yours, kissing you passionately.
When it was time for Jungkook to take a break, Taehyung thrusted into you, and you moaned against his mouth, his tongue slipping into yours.
Tongue against tongue, two cocks against one pussy, lips against lips, moans against moans. It was all too much, but at the same time, not enough.
“What is your favorite, babygirl? Tell us how you like us to fuck you.” Taehyung whispered against your ears.
You whimpered exactly how you wanted their two cocks to fuck you, and they happily listened to your wish.
“Ah! Ah!” Tears built up in your eyes before they rolled down your cheeks, you couldn’t handle it anymore. This felt so fucking good, having your pussy abused and used like this, sandwiched between those two men as they beat your pussy up, oh the way those long thick cocks filled your pussy to the brim, the way their cocks were stretching your pussy walls out, and the way they were abusing your g spot, it was all too much.
Your moans and whimpers turned into cries and screams. You couldn't take it anymore. You had been fucked by five other men before these two, and you had already cum so many times, and the overstimulation was really hitting you now.
"Fuck her harder, Kookie, she can take it."
They were going harder than before, if that was even possible, and you were seeing stars. You had never felt this amount of pleasure before.
Your toes curled, and your eyes rolled back, your mouth wide open as your body went limp against Taehyung, the room spinning as their cocks continued pounding into you without mercy.
The men knew that you were about to orgasm, and they kept going, knowing that you could take more.
Taehyung gripped onto your breasts, kneading into them, and he and Jungkook were panting heavily. You could hear their breathless moans, and they were whispering sweet things to you.
You were a drooling, twitching, sobbing mess, and the men were loving it. They loved seeing their slutty girl getting her pussy stretched by their cocks, they loved the way your pussy clenched around them, the way it dripped all over them.
Their dirty words, their hands all over your body, their cocks in your pussy, their mouths kissing all over you… You never wanted this to end.
“Cum… cum..” You didn’t know how to talk anymore, feeling light headed and delirious as your body was overwhelmed with pleasure. You didn’t even know where you were anymore or what your name was, the world was spinning and blurry, and all you could focus on was the feeling of their cocks.
“Yes, yes, yes, yes…” It felt so close, your whole body started to shake heavily, your eyes unable to focus on anything as your toes curled, and the intense pleasure washed over you. It took over your whole body and the heat washed through every inch as you orgasmed; it was the best one you had in your whole life, it felt like heaven.
The pleasure was too intense, and you were screaming as you were hit with wave after wave of pure bliss. You came all over their cocks, squirting so much, and you could hear them moan, the sounds of their voices sending you even higher.
Their thrusts grew sloppy and slow, both enjoying how you orgasmed around their cocks, yet eager to fill you up with their cum.
"That's it baby, milk our cocks with that tight pussy, yeah, fuck." Jungkook hissed.
Your pussy was still throbbing and squeezing around them, and the two men groaned.
Taehyung's arms tightened around your waist and he growled, pushing his cock in as deep as he could and released his seed, groaning in pleasure.
Jungkook picked up the pace and he did the same, digging his fingers into your thighs as he filled you with his seed.
They kept thrusting as they came, and the feeling of their hot, sticky, cum inside of you, and their cocks twitching inside of your sensitive pussy, made you squirt again, your body trembling.
You were left gasping and panting, trying to catch your breath. Your vision was still hazy and it took you a few moments before the room stopped spinning.
You were laid down on the bed, you weren’t even sure by who, as you laid there trying to catch your breath. You could feel the bed was soaked underneath you.
Fuck, this was the best day of your life.
#bts smut#bts requests#bts x reader#bts smut requests#bts poly fic#bts group smut#bts fanfic#taehyung smut#Jungkook smut#Jimin smut#Namjoon smut#bts seokjin smut#yoongi smut#hoseok smut#bts smut story#bts smut reactions#smut bts
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this how i think bts would be if they was your husband
namjoon:
you’d have your own rooftop garden together; like he’d get someone to get it setup architecturally the way he has it envisioned in his head and to give like advice on the types of plants that are good for this set up but y’all would do all the seeding and watering and weed pulling yourselves
evening walks together around sunset through the park or around the river hand in hand where you just soak up nature and talk about any and everything
you both like the idea of having a pet but know that you're too busy to keep one regularly so you end up getting fish; he gets a cute little 20 gallon tank and like five fish but he actually does a lot of research on which fish live the best together, which food and treats they like best, the best plants and knick knacks to put inside, how to clean it, etc.; all in all takes the whole situation way more seriously than you'd thought he would; it was supposed to be sumn light for the summer time but you'd think he's filming an episode of tanked for all the time and effort he pours into it
sits side by side with you rubbing circles into your lower back whenever you need to rant about something
loves it when you get desperate for him so sometimes around the time you're ovulating he teases you; will walk around the house in nothing but his briefs with his glasses on talking in his deep voice; will invade your space like if you're in the kitchen making food or something he's gonna come up behind you and wrap that strong arm around your middle kissing up on you asking meaningless questions about what you're doing until you finally snap and drag him to the bedroom
consistently opens every door for you and pulls out your chair at restaurants even if it's five, ten years down the line
the type to never know where anything is; it's not even that you switch things up a lot it's just that he never forgot the muscle memory of where things were when he lived alone; so he's constantly calling out to you asking where something is; half the time what he looking for be in very obvious locations but his mind is just so all over the place that he overlooks it
uses you as his sounding board when he has a situation he needs handled; will just sit there and think out loud to you for minutes and hours; you don't even be saying that much really like occasionally he'll ask what you think but he appreciates having a listening ear more than anything and you're happy to be there for him even if his incessant rambling makes you wanna strangle yourself sometimes
would learn to help you take out your box braids; it makes you nervous when he first offers to help because he can be a bit rough sometimes but he's oddly gentle and diligent with the task; once he's gotten good with that you convince him to wash your hair too; and take down/wash day is less dreadful because of it
you two become a package deal; like it could be a boys night or a girl's night and you're always gonna try to bring the other with and most of the time y'alls friends don't mind like you're one of the boys and he's one of the girls so it's fine; even if he like invites some friends over the house and you stay in the room to give them some space at some point he's gonna go and check up on you; you'll just be laying in bed on your laptop or phone, watching tv or something and he's gonna lay beside you and ask what you doing make sure you're okay next thing you know 30 minutes gon go by and you'll have to remind him that he has guests over; then he's gonna convince you to come out with him and stay tucked up under his arm until his friends leave or pass out
seokjin:
draws you a bath when he knows you’ve had a long day; it’d be really nice too; he'd light your favorite candle and set it on the counter; add a fragrant moisturizing bath bomb and sprinkle in some flower petals; once you settle in he'll put down one of them over the tub trays and hand you a glass of wine and your laptop so you can watch whatever you want or stream music while you’re in the tub
loves referring to you as 'his wife'; like y'all will be with a group of your friends that knew you from the get go and they'll ask him where he got his jacket from and he'll be like "oh my wife bought it for me" and they'll be like "🥴 boi we knew her long before she was ever worried about you just say her name" aksksksk
every couple months y’all will go on cooking dates with his celebrity chef friends and their wives; which is basically them in the kitchen being loud cooking a meal he specifically chose for you and you and the wife not too far away watching them while being wined and dined
not particularly handy but he feels like as a man there’s just certain things he should be able to do; so if your sink is leaking or there’s a problem with your car battery or something he’s gonna hop on youtube and figure out how to solve it first; calls an actual repairman to deal with it if he can’t fix it without being moderately inconvenienced
insists on getting a pool installed even tho you tell him you would barely use it bc you hate having to redo your hair more than you like to swim; you actually do end up using it all the time bc he orders one of those giant canopy floats and y'all just lay up there and take naps or talk; the whole outdoor area is actually bomb tbh like there's an entire sheltered outdoor kitchen and grill patio area with fans on the ceiling for when it gets hot and a fully loaded bar; y'all honestly spend more time outside during the summer than inside and get scolded for not entertaining people more often
if you reeeaaalllyyy want him to go shopping with you he will but he’d rather just give you his card and you gather up some of your girls and y’all can go nuts together
tries to butter you up when he knows he's in trouble but it's never with anything good like he'll stop at the convenience store on the way home and pick up some things to try to sway you; he get home and you're waiting for him slightly ticked off and he's like "i know you're mad but look at what i got you and it's a cosmic brownie, sour gummy worms (his favorite candy mind you), some wet wipes, and an arizona tea
official driver of the relationship; lets you be the passenger princess of your dreams like whenever you need to get from point a to point b he’s getting you there all you gotta do is sit down and look pretty (and play decent music while he’s driving)
even if you’re not a certified Gamer Girl™️ when there’s like a new mario game or something along those lines that doesn’t require a ton of skill and know how to play you’ll no life it together; like will straight up play for like 16 hours a day until you beat it; you still force him to eat and shower however but you’re not allowed to touch the controller until he returns bc he’d be afraid you’ll lose all your lives
the type to get super close with your family; like you look over one day and see yo mama calling him and you listen to him and they're literally just catching up???; he goes out on bros days with your dad and brothers; all your cousins follow him on instagram and be sending him memes; and you just sit there tryna figure out how he singlehandedly replaced you in your family bc they be treating him better than they treat you
yoongi:
after hearing you talk about wanting a detached claw foot jacuzzi tub for the 1000th time he decides to just go ahead and get your dream house built from the ground up; gives his input in every step of the process since he has so many opinions on architecture, furniture, finishes, and overall aesthetics; sometimes there’s little disagreements when your design styles clash but in the end he makes sure that you definitely get everything you’ve ever wanted included
warms your car up for you in the morning during winter months; unimportant but i just know he would go out in a sweatshirt and some slides like barefoot toes out in 20° weather shuffling out to make sure your car is nice and cozy and the frost is off the windshield
every now and again you’ll just be chilling at home and then he’ll be like “yah go get dressed we’re going out” and then he’ll genuinely take you on one of the best dates ever; it may not be over the top every time but somehow it’s always exactly what you needed; acts nonchalant about it when you’re gushing over how great of a time you’re having; “ah it’s nothing” but he’s secretly super self satisfied bc he knows he’s killing it
sometimes he’ll be sprawled out on the couch watching basketball and you’ll be tryna tell him something but he’s so engrossed that he won’t hear a word you say so you gotta throw a pillow at him to get his attention
untangles your necklaces for you; sweeps the hair from the back of your neck and clasps it together once he's got it free
likes leaning on your shoulder when you’re in bed on the computer; not really nosy about what it is that you’re doing whether it’s work or whatever but just likes to listen to the sound of your typing as his own personal asmr; also loves it when you get your nails done like will happily pay for a new set every other week because of the tippity tapping that accompanies everything you do
sets up a joint bank account for you two like immediately bc he doesn't have anything to hide and what's his is yours; but also sets you up a separate savings account that he funnels money into biweekly bc he wants you to be okay always even if one day it has to be without him
if you're both up late and you're feeling peckish he'll whip up a quick late night snack for y'all to munch on
never really comments when your hormones throw your body system out of wack; like if you randomly had night sweats for a couple days and sweat through your clothes and blanket he'd just nudge you awake so you can dry off and turn the ac on
is extra physically affectionate whenever you start getting irritated even if he’s the source of your irritation; will grab your hand and pull you into him planting kisses on top of your head and rubbing up and down your back until you’re sufficiently pacified
hoseok:
all his numeric passcodes are related to you; like it’s either your birthday or your anniversary, the day y’all met, first date, etc.
sometimes he likes to sit on the toilet when you're in the shower and talk to you; will periodically poke his head in to check your progress depending on how long you're in there; ooos and aahs and waggles his eyebrows every time he does so
some people think you’re some kind of dictator bc his response to every proposal he receives is “let me check with my wife first”; you’re not tho he just likes running things by you bc he’s only ever okay if y’all are on the same page; sometimes you really are his scapegoat if he doesn’t wanna do something tho and you’re fine with being his excuse! you love spending time with your man!!
y’all draw lots over who has to kill the bugs in the house; he tries his best to overcome his fear for you he really does but sometimes he look at the bug and the bug look at him and his heart can’t take it; generally tho there’s less fear of y’all conquer it together
at least once a month he books a couples spa day appointment for you two; deep tissue massages, facials, manicures, pedicures, the works like you just get absolutely spoiled; his motto is that if you feel good and look good then you can be good and be good to each other; unrelated but he get a kick out of eating the cucumbers that are supposed to help soothe around your eyes
you get so used to the sound effects he makes all the time that when he’s not around you have to have some kind of background sounds whether it’s music or white noise just something to fill the air.
you both like plushies, funko pops, action figures and all that so there's a dedicated toy room in your home; all the toys that you actually care about are placed higher up and in cases to keep in good condition but things that you don't mind having some use are accessible; the whole room is carpeted and there are some fluffy rugs too; there's a 65 inch tv on one wall and a computer area for gaming as well; the whole room is illuminated via led lights; needless to say all the kids you know love when y'all babysit them; they stay in that one room the entire time except when they want a snack bc there's no eating in the toy room; jungkook also loves to randomly come and hangout in the toy room by himself
wouldn't tolerate any kind of disrespect toward you; say you went out to a restaurant and the server was being rude to you, he'd clock it so fast he'd be talking to a manager having your server swapped out and dessert on the house before you even realized what they said
y'all try new hobbies together; it's never anything you have experience or are good at which makes it even more fun as you're doing it; like you'll get one of those woobles crochet kits and spend like a month trying to figure it out in your free time and make whatever little creature you bought
never actually stops dating you; will still have an active folder with activities and restaurants he wants the both of you to go to; even if you both lack the time and energy to actually go out on a date he's lighting a candle and pulling out the fine china for you it doesn't matter that you're wearing loungewear and sitting on the floor in front of the tv; he wants you to feel special always
jimin:
intimacy between you two go crazy; you’re as close as close can be like if there were such a thing as soulmates you two would be it; you’re consistently trapped within your own bubble and even if you’re out and about it’s still almost as if no one else existed; like say y’all went out to a club music is thumping people are everywhere it’s a generally Loud environment if you softly called his name from beside him he would turn to you immediately; or someone could brush past him and it’d be whatever but if you ghosted your hand up his arm he would get goosebumps; you’re just insanely in tuned to each other
would love if you had a softer build bc he likes the way you feel like heaven when he lays on you; also he just likes squeezing at your squishy bits; he finds it equal parts amusing and satisfying; like he'll squeeze at your boob when you're half asleep in bed just to annoy you; you'll be turned on your side and his arm will be slung across your waist and he'll just inch his hand up until he reaches your boob and squeezes; giggles evilly every time you smack his hand away and won't stop until you're whining and kicking at him to leave you alone and let you sleep
sometimes you’ll build a giant fort in the living room when he’s getting overwhelmed by life complete with fairy lights strung up overhead and pillows and more blankets covering the floor to make it extra comfy; you spend all day together in there playing games and talking nonsense and eating snacks and end the night cuddled up his arm wrapped around your shoulders, your head tucked into his neck watching movies until you’re sure his head is free from all his worries
loves to be fed, literally; like when dinner time comes he will make one big plate and pull up with a fork and a knife and a waiting attitude; if you don't play along immediately he's gonna put his hands over yours and make you feed him bites until you take over; likes to feed you as well; just always sharing his food with you and expects you to do the same
he gets obsessive when you don't answer his calls; like if he knows you're not busy and he calls you and you don't answer it drives him up a wall and he will spam you with texts and at least a dozen more calls until you pick up; not even because he has anything urgent to tell you he just always craves your attention; bonus: ends every conversation by saying i love you like you could be on the phone for 15 seconds just confirming something really quickly and he's gonna make sure he's told you he loves you before you click end call
doesn’t say anything when he finds you crying just pulls you into him and lets you get it all out; once you start calming down a bit he’ll pull back slightly, gently cupping your face in his hands and swipe away all your tears; only when he’s sure the tears have come to a complete stop does he softly ask “what’s going on?”
still gets shy and flustered around you; it doesn’t stop him from being himself around you whatsoever but it’s very obvious when you have the upper hand in a situation
you can't just tell him you need an item from the store bc half the time he'll go and come back with the wrong thing; you gotta send him a picture of it and that don't even work all the time; most of his solo ventures to the store at your request end in him facetimeing you bc he swears up and down they don't have what you asked for but then you end up finding it for him and you not even there
knows you admire his art skills so he leaves little doodles on post it notes around the house; is really proud when you display the ones you find really cute in your phone case
the type to put his life in your hands; when y'all go out to eat he tells you to order for him bc "you know what i like"; will let you dress him/style his hair however bc "you know what looks good on me"; he just literally trusts and defers to your judgement as much as possible
taehyung:
the type to tighten all the jars when you’re upset with him so you’re forced to ask him for help and talk to him anyway
would try to set up a really romantic dinner for you complete with rose petals and candles and champagne on ice but he'd be so focused on creating the right ambience that he forgets to order the food and one thing bout tae is he ain't a chef and even if he was he wouldn't have enough time before you showed up so you'd end up having a pb&j and cup noodles
sometimes if he has a lot of energy but you’re asleep he’ll poke at you until you’re awake and then he’ll ask if you’re asleep and when you say yes he’ll keep messing with you until he’s able to drag you out to play with him
knows how to tie a tie but claims it looks better when you tie it so whenever he wears a suit he gets you to finish off his look; really he just likes to be manhandled by you and the grip you have around his neck does something for him
if you get him riled up in the morning he just lives there all day; partially aware of what's going on around him but undoubtedly distracted, thinking about you, wanting you; hands and eyes are glued to the phone at all times hoping you'll message him or something even if it is just you teasing him some more; he's putty in your hands and he knows it but when the day is over and y'all are both home you're his
you have to come to major compromises when it comes to decorations; like you let him have his accent wall that he puts his paintings of his basquiat-esque faces but the weird cyber bug and person shark statues and the butt chair have to go
you do majority of the cooking so he takes dish duty very seriously; will swat you away if you try to help most times; however there’s a special place in his heart for the times you ignore him and help anyway by drying the dishes and it’s you him and some music playing and you’re singing and dancing around the kitchen together
there's a legitimate argument about your use of a body pillow; he genuinely gets offended bc is he not enough for you? why can't you just cuddle him? why would you go and put the great wall of china in between you two? what's with the distance? was he too much for you? like the situation blows completely out of proportion for no reason skslklsks the argument ends when you force him to cuddle it and he instantly understands the hype behind it; that doesn't curb his jealousy towards the object however and you're only allowed to use it when he's not in bed with you
a whiny baby when he's sick; you'd think he had tuberculosis in the 12th century instead of a common cold the way he be acting; a piece of tissue stuck in his nose, piled under three blankets, shivering every five minutes on cue; you give him a good day of dealing with the dramatics after that you leave him in the room with a bottle of dayquil and a packet of vitamin c until he decides to get on with his life like a normal human being
loves planning weekend getaways for the two of you; like every other month you guys are out of town for like 3-4 days in the spirit of “rekindling”; he always rents a really nice and cozy cabin type joint and most of the trips are spent just enjoying each others company and the scenery, walking around the town latched onto his arm and eating good food; you come back from each outing refreshed and more in love than you already were
jungkook:
every sunday he checks your car to make sure it has a full tank and if it doesn’t he fills it up for you
you two have separate rooms bc you both like to have space to just exist as an individual from time to time (also it’s really nice to have a place to storm away to when you’re in a fight) but you end up cuddled up next to each other every night anyway
has a very strict laundry schedule and routine; gets annoyed if you don't do it how he likes when he's unable to
watches you while you’re getting ready; he’ll be sitting at the edge of the bed while you walk around from your closet to the dressers circling the room trying to find something to wear; you’ll be having a conversation with him the whole time and after you walk past him for the 4th time his clinginess gets the best of him and he catches you by the waist before you can fully bypass him; he pulls you in between his legs and just hugs you to him for a few moments while you run your hands through his hair
follows you around the house with his mic serenading you like three times a week
comes behind you when you’re cooking or washing dishes or something and just pats at your butt for a while and by a while i mean he won’t stop until you elbow him and threaten to cut his hands off; he just laughs and gets one more grope in before backing off
traces the contours of your face and murmurs all kinds of cute and lovely and cheesy stuff about you when you’re both in bed and he thinks you’re sleep
if you made him a good meal you’d hear about it constantly for the next week; like every other sentence is a “seriously, it was so good” and he won’t stop until you make it again; sometimes he’ll try making it himself to see if he could do better but it always tastes best coming from you
an absolute menace in the grocery store; will spend the first 15-20 minutes behaving as he grabs whatever he needs personally and once that's done he's acting a fool; doing that thing that kids do when they use the cart as a skateboard like push off on it and then hop on to ride out the wave; grabbing all kinds of junk that neither of you need; touching everything even when he has no intention of buying it; you have to grab his ear and threaten him with celibacy to get him to calm down
whenever you’re sitting next to each other could be on the couch out at dinner in bed etc he likes to play with your hand and fiddle with your ring; will often slide it off and try to fit the ring on his fingers; then he’ll put it back on and kiss your fingertips for safekeeping
a/n: i worked on this for months and months and now it’s finally here lemme know what u thought 😩🙏
#bts#bts fanfic#bts fanfction#namjoon x reader#namjoon fanfic#rm fic#seokjin x reader#seokjin fanfic#jin fanfic#yoongi x reader#yoongi fanfic#suga x reader#suga fanfic#j hope x reader#hobi x reader#hoseok x reader#hoseok fanfic#jimin fanfic#jimin x reader#jimin x you#taehyung x reader#kim taehyung x reader#taehyung fanfic#jungkook x reader#jungkook fanfic#jeon jungkook x reader#jeon jungkook fanfic
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mami (m) | myg/knj
title: mami (m)
pairing: myg x reader(f) , knj x reader(f) , slight jhs x reader(f)😛
rating/genre: m (18+) ; smut ; battle rap au , roommates au
summary: you somehow have a conversation with yoongi, and you tell your roommate about a date date.
note: heavy 00s vibes, this is just the beginning of a collection of parts instead of just a oneshot let’s fucking goooo🦋
note 2: this is pretty unedited lolll if there are mistakes i'm so so sorry!
warnings for this part: language, choking, joon in sweats, bathroom s*x, b*ckshots, friendly sp*nks from your roomie🤪, it uhhh starts right out the gate lmfao, hobi in silk and a robe, yoongi is a warning in his own right, light sl*pping, you get called mamiii😗 so if that’s not ur thing i’d skip this series !!, joon is too smooth, a secret fourth guy lmfaoooo, battle rap scenarios!
drop date: september 26th, 2023, 10:07pm est
word count: 3.7k
mood: here
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“You like that, huh?”
Breath short, you can only gasp as the hands you’ve been eyeing all night clutch your throat, a fiendish hum the first response to your satisfied grin.
“Knew you would.” As your delicious captor speaks, you just know he’s fixated on your makeup—at least, the way it’s smearing onto a bathroom mirror that has seen better days. “You all do.”
Fuck, he knows what he’s doing. Fucking hell, he always knows.
Your lust condenses and slides down the glass in rivers, and with each experienced thrust inside your folds, it’s getting harder, and harder, and harder to see the man wrecking your shit.
But it’s coming. The end. The coil inside you is screaming and tightening and you know he can feel every potent pulse as you slap the tiny counter with a palm. “Yoongi—”
“You gonna come, mami?”
Yes yes yes you really fucking are. It’s so truthful that you can’t even voice your agreement in words, your moans higher and higher in pitch the only tell you can possibly give.
“Then fucking do it.”
Light bounces from your eyes and rebounds off the mirror the same time your whine does, every limb locking while bare shoulders bang against your reflection.
“Fuck.”
You spring right into the ground floor above, eyes rolling so far back you could probably see the way Yoongi’s smirking at your ass if your dumbfounded mush of a brain wasn’t in the way.
Again, and again, you milk his cock for all it’s worth, spurning him into gripping your bouncing hips with rough hands and faster strokes. Laughs and conversations seep through the door at your side, but you can’t make out a thing as you garble,
“Yoongi, please—”
“One more.”
“I can’t—”
“Don’t play dumb,” he tuts. “You won’t hustle me a second time.”
Busted.
Your pout quickly stretches into a devilish curve instead, and you hear his sound of approval before you brag,
“I spent all that already, by the way.”
Air whizzes past your ears as you’re hoisted upwards, and your mirth reverberates as you’re spun and shoved into the sink, cheap laminate bruising your back.
Yoongi must also be remembering the time your pussy sucked the soul out of him. After you both made a bet that you couldn’t beat someone’s record time making him come.
You won half of his prize money that night.
And that was the night he won the entire thing.
“You’re lucky I respect it,” he snarls, sweaty fingers gripping your chin as he slings a leg over his pelvis. When he grins, you wanna lick the white off his teeth. “And you’re lucky I made it back the next night.”
Oh, shit. Did he really?
Battle rap events usually stack so that everyone gets a chance. How did he get invited back the same weekend?
Well, other than being a monster on the mic. There’s a reason you can’t stay away from him, and you may or may not admit you get turned on by how effortlessly ruthless he is.
Lips smushed, you ask with genuine curiosity, “You won again?”
Yoongi lightly smacks your cheek, chuckling when you grit out a moan. “Nah. The sponsors loved me,” he claims, finally bringing a hand down to guide himself back inside. “So they paid me to come back.”
“Sick,” you praise through a grunt, fully catching his eyes for the first time tonight. Pushing past the way he fills you so fantastically, you huff out, “That doesn’t happen on south side.”
“So I’ve heard.”
“Yeah, apparently west and east side do it a lot. Especially with that guy Randa—”
“Fuck Randa.”
Ah, so Yoongi knows him? You haven’t ventured into the west scene yet, but the one thing you know about it is that dude’s name.
So he must be a beast.
Especially if Gloss himself had some choice words.
At this little slip of emotion, you don’t hide your smirk at all. “Oh? Maybe I will if that’s how you feel.”
The sudden possessive shove of his cock into your folds is delightful, your high giggle pinging off the bathroom walls.
“Fuck whoever you want, princess,” he chides right against your lips. “You’ll always come back to me.”
“Duh.” You flick your tongue over his plush. “You wouldn’t last a week without me anyway.”
Yoongi pushes into you again, stare heavy and coaxing butterflies from your belly. “I’d manage.”
“As if.”
But even through the pleasure, you still wonder. How are you both having a regular conversation right now? This never happens with him. You’ve wanted it to, but there simply hasn’t been any talk when he’s involved.
The high from your orgasm compounds with this strange feeling that you turn a little playful.
“What I meant was…” Fingernail poking his tank, you joke with a sly curve, “Guess you must be like, good or whatever.”
When he looks down, you childishly swoop your finger up to bump his nose. “Ha. Loser.”
Predictably, Yoongi pauses before only his eyes raise, suppressed emotions hiding behind long dark strands. “Really.”
And even though you felt him twitch in your core, you’ll spare him. “I don’t make the rules.”
You think this is when he’ll start ramming into you again, because none of the times you’ve hooked up ever lasted this long. It’s always been quick with him, and never in any other place other than bathrooms or broom closets.
Which isn’t bad. Just a pattern you’ve noticed.
But Yoongi huffs in amusement before shaking his head. “Since when were you this weird?”
“Wow, rude?” Your scoff is full of mock annoyance. “I’ve always been this way.”
It’s just that no one’s taken the time to get to know you.
“But you’re so…”
All they care about is one thing.
Which, granted, is the same in your case.
It just gets a bit lonely sometimes.
Offering to finish for him to stiff arm any more incoming awkwardness, you blurt, “Hot? Slutty?”
“Fast.”
Oh.
Did you both just assume the other person wanted it over and done with?
That’s entirely possible considering the first time it happened lasted a grand total of three minutes. Max.
“I mean…” You lean back on your palms, not caring to adjust your very mussed top because your chest finally snags all of Yoongi’s attention. How he’s still hard inside of you is a complete mystery. “I don’t just fuck, you know.”
“And here I thought we were similar,” he teases, groaning through his teeth when you roll on his dick. Again.
And again.
Of course you’re both similar. The only difference is that people dub this guy a sex god and you’re an easy lay.
But you won’t get into that with him. Not now and probably not ever since you don’t dare even label Yoongi a friend.
Panting, you observe him watching your movements as you switch the subject, “You fucked that one sponsor chick for the invite, huh.”
And he takes the out hilariously quick,
“Both of them.”
Of course. Your head kicks back in laughter, remembering that there were two people running the event instead of one.
Truthfully, you would’ve paid to see that.
“Can’t stand you,” you lie, the way you chuckle as he slaps one of your tits saying otherwise.
“Good.”
As he rubs a rough thumb over a nipple, an announcement blares over deejay scratches and cheers, tugging both of your eyes to the door.
Before things quickly devolve into how they always go.
When you arch forward, his lips devour your breast; when you rock your hips into his, the groans against your chest make you feel alive.
Your nails claw through his hair before you can’t decide if you wanna rake them through his shoulders or his neck. Here, there, everywhere you can grab, you take hold.
Suddenly, Yoongi clutches the top of your skirt before thrusting in hard, and his laugh when you whine out a curse strikes your soul. “It’s better that way.”
It’s always better that way.
“Agreed,” you murmur, eyes flickering to the janky ceiling before sighing out, “I think they just said your name.”
“Mm.”
He plunges into you so hard you see his impish curve imprinted among the stars.
“Then hurry up, mami. Gimme one more for luck.”
MAMI
“Who’s on the menu tonight?”
You hum while peering into your mirror—a much cleaner, brighter mirror than the one you were pressed against a couple weeks ago. “That nice guy I’ve been seeing at the gym.”
“Wait, what? Are you going on a date date?”
“Hobi,” you giggle, loving your roommate very much despite the way he just forgets sometimes. “We went through this already.”
“So… Is that a yes, or.” His laugh blurts out when you throw a middle finger next to your head. “Okay, okay! You can just say it, you know.”
“I just”—you spot check your makeup before vacating your vanity stool—“You know me. I never do dates.”
As Hobi leans back on your bed, the way his hot pink robe matches your comforter makes you highly amused. Almost amused enough that you don’t react to his nosy question,
“Nervous?”
Extremely.
“Uhm,” you start, all pretenses dropping at the sight of his cocked brow. “A bit.”
Springing up, your roommate pads over and rests thin palms over even thinner straps of your sundress.
“What’s got you nervous, love?”
Pouting, you look out your window before your chin is gently swiveled back forward. Thankful for his insistence, you confess to the only guy that you feel like you can trust,
“What if I like him?”
The laugh you get is full of disbelief and pity. “That’s what you’re worried about? Really?”
When you nod, he chuckles again, but it’s smaller. And more understanding than the first.
“Pathetic, right.”
“No, no no,” Hobi starts, sliding his hands down to warm your biceps before squeezing. When he pauses, his expression gives his thoughts away before he can utter them. “Well, a little.”
“Hoseok.”
“But! Only because you’re making it seem that way.” He squeezes again before sitting back down on your bed. “If you just let things happen without thinking, isn’t that better?”
Does he really have to flop down to rest his head on his palms? Now?
Talk about not thinking.
Whatever. You didn’t expect Hoseok to do that, but he looks hot, so you’ll let it slide.
And you don’t shy away from his silk-covered package before retorting, “Says you.”
“Me? I overthink. That’s different.”
“How!”
“Don’t think about it.”
When he winks, you both laugh, and his grin slowly devolves into a smirk before he motions you over with a mere head cock.
And you gladly oblige.
Because your dynamic with Hobi still hasn’t changed.
Slowly, you arrive at his knees before mounting the bed at his hips, being steadied over his pelvis as he keeps his prone position.
“You look hot as fuck, you know.”
“Mmhmm.”
“He’s gonna like you for sure.”
“Naturally.”
“So what if you end up liking him, too?”
As he smoothes a hand over the side of your ass, you purse your lips in thought. “Uhh… Feelings? I guess?”
“You can have those, babe.”
“Not mine,” you correct, knowing yours are too fucked up to share with anyone. Which is exactly why you’re all for the so-called fast title that Yoongi clipped onto your persona. “His.”
Does the lifestyle you chose come with regrets? Yeah. Complications? Also yes. But at least those hurt less than the regrets and complications actual relationships come with.
You’re just fine with how things are.
Which is why you’re scared about seeing Namjoon, because he seems like the type that wants something steady. If you end up liking him, you’re gonna have to choose between options that are vastly different in color.
Despite all that, you still said yes when he asked you out at the gym last week—while you were drenched, bare-faced, and wincing from the last set you completed to failure.
Why did you say yes anyway? What drew you in to this guy?
“If you’re scared of hurting his feelings, then just tell him straight-up,” Hobi advises, pulling you back to the present. “Guys won’t know shit unless you spell it out.”
Looking down at his perfect features, you fake disbelief, asking the most rhetorical question in existence, “You mean you can’t just read our minds?”
“Baby, we can’t even figure out our own, let alone yours.”
“You said it.” Fully reassured, you rest on Hoseok’s chest, careful to not smudge your face on his clothes. “…Pity fuck if the date goes wrong?”
“Of course.”
Your chuckle is soft. “Thank you.”
“Now get up,” he orders, smacking your ass so perfectly that it offends you. “Before I give you another necklace.”
“Hoseok!” When his cackles follow you up as you stand, your jaw cannot hinge back in. “Goddamn, you’re bad.”
“Not as bad as you,” he says, following you out of your room. “Mami.”
That goddamn nickname.
Hobi knows it’s a common term. And he knows it’s one you hear from multiple people, especially on south side. Literally nothing new or groundbreaking.
But he also knows it makes you unwell because of one specific person. Because you confessed that you didn’t expect it from them during a fuck and it made you weak in the knees.
Which caused the same motherfucker to say it over, and over, and over again.
Fucking Yoongi.
Why the hell is it only potent when he says it?
The psychology of that needs to be studied yet you will completely refuse to be a subject.
After checking to make sure you have everything, you fish out your phone to double-check the address before calling a ride.
“Where is it at?”
“Some restaurant on west side.”
“Damn, all the way over there?”
“I’m okay with it,” you assure him, inwardly wincing at the cost on your screen.
Virtually anything on west side is far from your condo, but that’s partly why you’re alright with going. As much as you get around, you don’t prefer taking people back to your place.
Besides. No one needs to know where you live unless you really fuck with them.
And it’s only happened twice.
Hoseok’s unconvinced reply cuts your thoughts in two,
“Alright… Well. Lemme know if you end up somewhere else tonight.”
Smiling, you offer him a warm look, positive that his lean against the kitchen wall would put models to shame. “I always do.”
“What did I say earlier?”
“Spell it out for him.”
“Okay, good.”
When you grin, he does, too.
And you hope this Namjoon guy at least does well with words.
Turns out, he does a fucking splendid job with them.
At least, the things this man is saying has you absolutely melting under dim lights, and you haven’t even gotten your drinks yet.
“You look damn nice tonight, by the way,” he mentions with a dip of his head, fiddling with his napkin and giving you an upsettingly perfect view of his fingers. “I feel underdressed as hell.”
Underdressed? Looking around, you feel like you’re the one that dressed way too formal and you’re in a damn sundress.
You should’ve known, though. The restaurant that Namjoon chose occupies one of the few streets known for its laid-back, easy-going fare. Even you have heard of its unique charm and you reside quite a ways away.
Before you respond, you remember how you arrived, checking around the small space before spotting him in a booth. And while you loved the lax way he dressed, you were even more charmed when he got out just to greet you with a cheek kiss.
And the night has been so pleasant that you forget to be worried.
“Why? I mean, thank you, but why?”
Namjoon gives his sweatpants-covered thighs a glance. “I dunno. You just look bossed up and I’m like, your errand boy.”
Your mirthy disbelief leaks out of your grin before he can finish. Watching a nearby table point at their menus to order, you go along with his compliments,
“I mean, I could use an assistant…”
He only smiles at his hands. “Order me around anytime.”
Cute.
Maybe that’s why you’re drawn to this guy.
Even though he’s huge and can lift like a motherfucker, there’s a soft side that he’s got no shame showing.
Also, as the night goes on, you quickly discover more traits you rarely come across.
Curious, suave, humble—all of them surprise you in the best way. He’s already let you talk much more than he has, and the two of you have debated on not one, but three topics. Including one that you would have left his ass for if you both weren’t on the same page.
“Okay, so we agree.”
“Yes,” he responds in relief. “Definitely would’ve rethought this whole thing if we didn’t.”
“Uhh, yeah, because I would’ve walked out and let you pay for everything.”
“Damn!” Fuck, his grin is charming. “And I would’ve paid it, too.”
Laughing—and realizing that you’re doing that a lot tonight—you rest a hand on his shoulder, “No, no, I wouldn’t do that to you.”
Fuck, he’s solid.
“Wait, I’m getting us this time, though.”
“Yeah?”
Holding a round glass up to his lips, he coolly adds,
“And next time, too.”
Well.
There’s no way you’re saying no to that.
“To next time,” you offer, clinking cups and taking a nice sip of your wine.
Things end with both of you just having dinner—a concept so foreign that it makes you wonder if he wanted something more than a second date.
But judging by the times he kept stealing glances and the way his curve stayed at a slant, it’s an open and shut case.
It’s always a bit crowded in the front few rows, so it doesn’t bother you to hang back for the first time in awhile.
Besides, you’re a little late from your date anyway.
Since nothing else happened with Namjoon—he had to leave pretty quick—you determined that you could make it to another Gloss smackdown.
After you greet all the people and bodyguards hanging around the front doors, you arrive downstairs just in time to hear the deejay ushering everyone in.
And based on what you hear, it seems like Yijeong’s got extra volume in his mic tonight.
“Alright, alright, let’s give it up for our two up here, yeah?”
Everyone cheers as you clap to yourself, leaning against a chilly column and ignoring the stares your outfit gets.
The stage looks quite different from back here, with its huddled occupants talking amongst themselves. While you watch both crews laughing and standing around, you wonder what it would be like to support Yoongi from up there instead of on the ground.
You really would if he wanted you to.
“I don’t have to introduce either one but I’m gonna do it anyway. Cus that’s the rules or whatever and they both deserve some love. Give it up for my man K Shine!”
You aren’t familiar with him but you support anyway. A tiny whoop leaves your mouth as a big portion of the room shouts, and you watch as the guy nods to the people that came to see him.
“Oh, we’re showing out, okay. Alright, now let’s hear it for my guy Gloss!”
In contrast, your energy evolves tenfold, and you gladly yell with the rest of the floor as Yoongi stays piercing the ground at his feet.
This guy.
Still the same routine.
You always muse that he could look into the crowd once in awhile, especially since his audience is steadily growing.
If they ever saw his smile, maybe more people would be drawn in wait is he looking up this time?
Wait.
Despite there being rows and rows between you and the stage, you don’t miss the slight shift in his demeanor. It almost looks like he’s scanning the people in front.
What’s he doing? Is he looking for something? Someone?
…He’s not looking for you, is he?
You’re there quite often and always in the same area, but you didn’t think Yoongi would really notice or be checking for you right now.
…But is he?
Before you can think any further, the quick blares of an airhorn shove your thoughts away.
“K Shine, you win the toss,” the middle man on stage announces. Fuck, you think you’d know his name by now, he’s been here a lot ever since the first guy disappeared. “What you got.”
When the man answers, he stares right at Yoongi’s hooded head, fire flaring up the walls already,
“Mister Big House, Big Car, Big Rings can go first.”
Oh.
He—
You really fucking regret not being in the front now.
Immediately, the whole room ooh’s, with the middle man pursing his lips and giving the two opponents space.
Light illuminates the whole stage as both sides back up a bit, heavy cameras set to roll and some feedback ringing through the musty air.
And you wait with bated breath as the crowd goes quiet.
Heart stilling as Yoongi holds a mic right up to his lips.
—
—
—
tbc :)))
—
so.. what do we think lmaooo 🦋 | join the taglist :D
a/n: thank you all for reading! as i don't have too much time to spend on fics nowadays, i'll be heavily considering feedback and excitement around fics to determine what to work on. if you did enjoy, please interact however you can! even a like is okay at this point, but all tags, reblogs, comments, messages, and submissions in the feedback box are super appreciated.
a/n 2: all the names i’m gonna include that aren’t the members (or yijeong lol) are real life battle rappers! k-shine was one of the first ones i ever watched, and he has good aggressive delivery and performance but not too many heavy hitters. anybody i namedrop will have rap battles linked, so here is one of k-shine’s that i remember from back in the day. battle rap is an art form in itself, and i would like to showcase these talented individuals whenever i can.
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⇥ of course, any reblogs/comments/messages are appreciated!
⇥ for the ones that are too shy to reblog with a review, comment on this, or send a message, i went ahead and made another anonymous form where you can send in what you think!
⇥ no emails collected, no need to put in a username. it’s literally just a comment dropbox :D feedback can be as short/sweet or as long as you’d like!
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#y'all we finally did it we finally posted something :')))#bts fic#yoongi fic#namjoon fic#bts imagines#bts reactions#bts fanfic#bts smut#yoongi smut#namjoon smut#hoseok smut#*ryenfictalk#*latest#ryenwrites#rapline fic#rapline smut#yoongi x reader#namjoon x reader#hoseok x reader
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Stay Alive Masterlist
" Came like a Miracle, Look like a miracle, Just like Miracle, Those few words...."
Synopsis: When you started working at a pharmaceutical company, you didn’t realize where it was your life was heading. After getting a patient mix up, you meet seven men who would didn’t seem to want any other nurse that wasn’t you. When you start to know them, you notice things that made you question if they were really human. No matter what excuse they would give though, you would always go home with a heavy heart. The day the truth is revealed to you, things take a turn for the worst.
Pairings: BTS poly!ot7 x Reader
Genre: Mystical Creatures AU, Fluff, Romance, Angst, Fantasy
Warnings: Smut in future chapters, toxic work environment, abuse
Taglist: I have decided to write smut chapters. However it’s just one per member. Maybe some things here and there. With that being said. I will not have a taglist on those chapters for fear of having minors tagged. My books are mostly for a general audience because smut isn’t my main writing. However with the very small number of chapters I will probably do, it’s best to not tag anyone. I understand some of you have ages but I don’t want to struggle with picking out each adult blog. Thank you for understanding.
A/N
(1) -- (2) -- (3) -- (4) -- (5)
(6) -- (7) -- (8) -- (9) -- (10)
(11) -- (12) -- (13) -- (14) -- (15)
(16) -- (17) -- (18) -- (19) -- (20)
(21) -- (22) -- (23) -- (24) -- (25)
(26) -- (27) -- (28) -- (29) -- (30)
(31) -- (32) -- (33) -- (34) -- (35)
(36) -- (37) -- (38) -- (39) -- (40)
(41) -- (42) -- (43) -- (44) -- (45)
(46) -- (47) -- (48) -- (49) -- (50)
" Those few words that saved me I'll be by your side after many nights..."
Taglist is officially closed!
#bts fanfic#bts army#bts#bts jungkook#bts jimin#bangtan#bangtan sonyeondan#run bts#namjoon#jimin#taehyung#bts v#bts jin#yoongi#hoseok#jhope#hobi#jung hoseok#bts namjoon#bts jung hoseok#bts jungguk#kpop fanfic#jungkook#bts jhope#bts hobi#park jimin#jimin bts#bts taehyung#bts imagines#bts smut
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Our Little Love part seven - OT7 Mafia/Yandere au
What’s that saying? One step forward two steps back? 👀 6K words containing: manipulation, toxic yandere men, non-consented acts of affection, lies, possessive behaviour, jealousy, allusion to crime and kidnapping.
“Little love,” Jin calls for you absentmindedly, frowning when you don’t look up from your book to answer him. It’s one you had read a million times before, maybe you didn’t hear him.
“Little love?” He tries again, looking confused as you let out a disgruntled sigh of annoyance.
He can see your jaw clench, something had pissed you off. Your foot became restless as you sat in the arm chair, it was only when Jimin cleared his throat obviously he remembered the terms and conditions you had enforced.
This time he lets out a big sigh, one of tested patience. He mumbles an apology before turning away, a bitter feeling creeping up his chest. Fuck, he resented the fact he couldn’t call you that anymore, it was like asking him not to breathe. Fuck fuck fuck, they needed to earn your forgiveness soon or this might actually kill them. Not that they ever underestimated you, but you really did know which weapons to pull to hurt them the most, and fuck did he have to admit they deserved it. Didn’t mean he had to like any of it.
Jimin follows him out, a quick glance back at you to see if you were paying any concern but of course not. Since the day you announced the break you’d been keeping your distance, Jimin had complained about it childishly with tantrum tears in his eyes but you had patiently explained you needed the space to clear your head.
Jimin scoffs at the memory, feeling sour about it still. The pout he wears gives away his thoughts when they both find Yoongi in the kitchen.
“Little love giving you a hard time?” he says almost amused.
It’s Jin’s turn to scoff dramatically, ears burning so red, Yoongi swears there’s steam.
“We can’t call her that anymore,” he complains, sulking.
Yoongi smiles a little, not because he truly found his hyung’s pain entertaining, but because he understood the pain.
“It’s a difficult situation,” Yoongi agrees, “but the alternative would have been so much worse.”
Jimin and Jin stare silently at him, their gazes aggressive as if they wanted to hit the male but they didn’t because he was right. The worst alternative wasn’t expecting you to leave, they all knew they would never let that happen, but if you had become a ghost of yourself, if they had broken you so badly there was nothing left to rebuild, then what would be left of you?
“When did you become so considerate?” Jimin scoffs, rolling his eyes. He didn’t like any of it, he didn’t care if you were right and they were wrong, you had taken away their most prized and valuable possession, you. He couldn’t help the internal tantrums as if someone had taken away his favourite toy. Call him childish, call him whatever the hell you wanted, he hated this situation, and he couldn’t hide it.
They apologised, and apologised, and apologised, and you still gave them the cruellest punishment you could think of.
“You’re still thinking with anger,” Yoongi acknowledges, knowing when Jimin cooled down from this he would probably be the one with the most regret and remorse, what he didn’t know is Jimin was clinging to his resentment with all his might, because once that gave way he would have so much to answer for.
—
Men would pay money to see Jung Hoseok hesitate, but that was exactly what he was doing now. Another book in your hand (you were reading a bit too much lately, he didn’t like it, it was as if you knew you couldn’t leave physically so you were doing so mentally), and he was stalling himself with interrupting you.
Your rejection cut holes into him, and that’s what he was afraid of when approaching you today. When he was younger he used to be afraid of everything, but after indulging in the horrors of survival and the syndicate, nothing terrified him any more, or so he thought before his heart belonged to you.
“Litt-” he catches himself before he says it too loud, clearing his throat quietly hoping you didn’t hear him. “Y/n?”
He sounds more confident, his more serious persona going up as if that would protect him here. He knew he needed it, any sane person after experiencing his pleasure and pain games would run at the sight of him, and a part of him was getting ready to catch you if you did.
You look at him and it has him crumbling. Something in his chest physically hurts him so bad he thinks he needs to go see a specialist, one glance from you and he’s ready to beg on his knees again for your forgiveness. The distance between you, although you were here in front of him, killed him. It felt eerily similar to what it did when you left, and it confused his brain and body so much.
He had to remind himself every day, you were still here, you still loved them, this was just temporary.
“I-I wasjus- I was just heading to the b-basment,” forget money, men would lay down their lives to see Jung Hoseok stutter and stumble over his words.
You frown in question when he doesn’t continue, but stares at you expectantly, until he realises he hadn’t explained what he wanted.
“For a workout!” He rectifies himself quickly before taking a breath to calm himself, “I wondered if you wanted to join me?”
He mentally pats himself on the back quickly for sounding more put together, but then his nerves start to shake again when you don’t respond immediately. You contemplate it, for too long in his eyes, stretching out the pause until you have the man sweating. Who needs a work out, just piss your girlfriend off and try to spend time with her while she's still mad.
“Yeah, okay,” you nod, finally putting down your book (he should get Jimin to burn them all). “I’ll go get changed.”
The relief and joy that floods Hobi almost makes him pass out, a genuine smile he hasn’t felt on his own face for days bursts through. This was a step in the right direction, you didn’t hate him or you would’ve shut him down. With the amount of hope in his system, he was getting giddy.
—
You wanted some time alone this evening, without them lingering around you, with poor attempts of covering their intentions with busying themselves. As if you couldn’t see Jimin’s imploring stare as he walked past you from the corner of your eyes. Or the way Jin would walk towards you, hesitate and then walk away.
You didn’t say they couldn’t talk to you, you were just on a break. Part of you knows you should seek them out and start civil conversation but that part also knew once you opened the door they would come barging through. An inch would turn into a mile and you would be back where you started.
So now you were busying yourself with the world’s worst chore, just to escape and breathe for a second, laundry. You were sorting through the load at a snail’s pace, knowing when you were done you’d have to endure them again. You’re so embedded in your own thoughts you don’t feel another presence join you.
Arms wrap around you, making you still. His figure almost engulfs you from behind, his nose already finding purchase on your neck as he buries himself against you. You try not to sigh, you were sick of hearing the sound yourself but it was always one of patience.
You understood how hard it was for them to accept your decision for a ‘break’, but all you wanted was some respect for it. And this broke your no touching rule.
“Tae let go,” you say without an ounce of emotion, continuing sorting out the laundry in front of you.
His only reaction to your words is the opposite of course, holding you tighter against him making your heart skip too many beats to count. Your skin sizzled with something akin to longing, a fire he only seemed to ignite when his breath hit your neck.
You don’t give in. You throw the item of clothing in your hand down, both hands on the edge of the basket as you still, standing statue as he tries his hardest to work through your defences. You don’t respond when he nuzzles his nose against where he’s buried, or to the rumble of his chest when he breathes you in deeply. His eyes are closed, you know they are, he’s relishing the moment all he can before you take it away.
He doesn’t feel you respond the way he wants you to, he wants you to melt against him and the urge is so strong but somehow you resist. He whines, the sound so soft near your ears you almost miss it. He tries holding you tighter still, his thumb stroking soft circles on your skin, trying to tempt you to break your resolve. Gentle, almost whisper like kisses are placed on your shoulder as he finally breaks away.
“Are you done?” You say almost coldly as he steps back, picking back up another item of clothing.
You hear him sniff but you don’t let it move you.
“Heaven, please,” he begs, a fist in your top clutching onto you.
That’s when you turn to face him. If he expects to see any softness in your gaze he’s sorely mistaken, it’s not a glare you’re giving him but it’s close enough that it burns. You don’t even flinch when you see tears in his eyes.
“I asked you not to touch me,” you state quietly but your words are firm. “Or that if you did, you asked first.”
He looks down, partly in shame, partly in grief. You can’t stand to see the sight, it makes your heart ache, so you walk away.
—
“Y/n?” Jungkook asks for your attention, biting his lips in worry. “Can I ask you about the book you’re reading?”
The others in the room feel an overwhelming sense of envy when you smile at the maknae. Jimin’s jaw goes slack as you scoot over to let Jungkook sit beside you. Envy was a dangerous thing, how he wanted to pluck the youngest of them out of the seat and take his place, but he hadn’t calmed his emotions down enough yet to approach you properly, and he knew if he did he’d ruin whatever rebuilding the others had done. No, he had to be patient with himself and withdraw, even if that meant physically. He was playing cards with Yoongi and Seokjin, but he places his cards down and leaves.
Jin’s pout overtakes his face when he turns away from the sight of Jungkook grinning while you talk animatedly, putting down a card without thinking and letting Yoongi take the win this round. Yoongi didn’t even notice, his gaze goes soft at the way you laugh at a teasing comment Jungkook made, a sound he hasn’t heard in what felt like forever. The sound even makes the corners of Jin’s pout pull up.
The youngest of the group honestly thought he was in paradise, he didn’t even care about the book he just wanted to hear you talk without reservation. His focus was on the way your eyes lit up, the genuine smile on your face, how does he try to make this moment last forever? He pays attention to every word you utter, asking the right question to keep you going, even making a joke here and there and feeling so pleased with himself when you laugh.
How did the relationship regress back so far that he felt like this was the start of it, like he was still pursuing you to give him a chance, like he had to work up the courage to ask you out all over again. The answer of course was in their mistakes, the thought dampens his mood but he pushes it away. He didn’t know when he would get another moment like this, he had to soak it all in and cherish it before it was over.
—
Your defences go up when you spot Jimin bringing Taehyung to you, the shorter male holding his hand guiding your bear like boyfriend in front of you. You look at them both expectantly, wondering what the theatrics were for. Taehyung sniffles, his face hanging low, his red hoodie pulled down as far as he can get it to hide himself.
“Taehyung has something he wants to say Heaven- I mean angel- I mean Y/n,” he corrects himself repeatedly with a shake of his head, cheeks burning in slight embarrassment at the blunder, but he wouldn’t apologise for it even it that made him a hypocrite for what he was making Taehyung do.
He pushes his friend gently, encouraging him to speak.
“Tae?” you say gently, remembering how harshly you spoke to him the other day.
Apparently that was all it took for the man to break down into tears in front of you, falling to his knees as he bawled. Your jaw drops in shock at the action, but you’re more surprised at the fact he holds himself back from launching into you for comfort.
You can see how hard it is to do so, he’s hugging himself, but his nails dig into the fabric of his clothes. He still doesn’t look at you, his gaze on the floor. You give him a second to compose himself, the sobs turning into little hiccups as he wipes his face with his sleeve.
When he looks at you it's your turn to grip the armrests of the chair with all your might, those glassy eyes beg you for love and it takes everything not to smother him in your embrace. But that would undo all the work you’ve been doing, you had to talk it out first and then maybe if this was resolved you could reward him with physical affection, just a little.
“I-I’m sorry,” he says through a hoarse voice, the sound only breaking your resolve further. “About the other day, I s-should’ve asked first.”
He tries to take a deep breath in but it’s shaky, for some reason what he wants to say next breaks him out into more tears. He covers his face as he cries, Jimin rubbing his back providing him with the comfort you couldn’t give just yet.
“Doyouhateme?”
The muffled question breaks your heart, Jimin can see it on your face and it has him fighting down a smirk. He may have played a hand at manipulating the situation, convincing Taehyung this was the best way to get back into your good books.
“Tae no,” you breathe, eyes watering but you blink back the tears. You didn’t want to show them any weakness anymore. “I don’t hate you.”
You sigh, eyes to the ceiling, as if begging for control over yourself as you try really hard to not give in to the feeling of wanting to crawl into his lap and hold him.
“I just really needed some space that day,” you explain, “and you caught me at a bad time.”
That wipes away Jimin’s elation, all this talk about space and distance, it already felt like you were living on Mars. How much space did you want? In his opinion there had been too much space, that was the problem, or were you forgetting the long agonising months of your absence?
Taehyung nods, thankfully retaining your attention away from Jimin who couldn’t hide his thoughts from his face.
—
You can’t sleep, tossing and turning from your side to your back and then to your side again. Were you fighting a losing battle? Were you being unfair in asking them to change? You remember cases of forgotten wives refusing to leave their no good husbands, the amount of inane times you heard the cries of ‘I can get him to change’... had you become one of those women? Then of course came the others, the women who knew they could not work miracles on their partners and gave up. Some left, some stayed, and you remember watching them all in the years of your career, arrogantly thinking it would never be you, no man would ever trap you like this. There was a joke in there somewhere, one man certainly didn’t, but seven did.
The knock on the door thankfully interrupts your endless circle of pity, a meek Jungkook peeking around as he opens the door. Something about the scene felt familiar but the shoe was on the other foot. He was waiting for permission to come in, you don’t know why the sight made you smile, made you warm.
If anyone was proof that they were trying for you it was Jungkook, Yoongi had kept his distance out of respect for your rules, you know he only did so because he couldn’t help himself if he got too close. Jimin was similar although, you could see he was keeping his distance mentally, angry with you and your conditions. It would pass, you were sure, or at least you hoped.
Jungkook was the only one that accepted everything without complaint, and you knew it wasn’t easy. You were so grateful to him for it, for respecting your boundaries sincerely, for giving you hope that this relationship could be salvaged.
He almost trips over himself when you pull the covers back wordlessly, inviting him in, the stumble of his legs as he races towards you makes you giggle. He climbs in without hesitation, about to reach out for you but he stops himself, eyes looking up at you, wanting to ask you out loud but too afraid to.
“It’s okay,” you reassure him quietly, as if talking loudly would break the peace you felt with him there, that you’d second guess yourself.
Arms you’ve longed for wrap around your waist, pulling you towards him. You hold him back gently, not letting yourself get lost in him the way you wanted. In the darkness, your gazes meet, talking loudly in a way filled the silence.
“I’ve missed you,” he breathes out hard, unable to hold it in any longer.
“I’ve missed you too,” you admit.
He bites his lips to refrain from saying anything else, to break the illusion that everything was okay.
“I used to think I understood your darkness,” you murmur, stroking his hair out of his face.
He pulls you closer, burying his head against your chest, the youngest didn���t like how that sentence was going and part of him didn’t want to hear the rest.
“But I don’t think I ever did,” you confess in a whisper, starting to ramble. “I don’t get it Kookie, why me? This obsession, I thought I felt it the same as you, I thought you guys understood me too.”
You let out a shaky breath, trying to keep up with your thoughts when you felt the hands of sleep trying to catch you.
“Maybe I was just trying to excuse my own darkness,” you sigh, almost in defeat. “Or maybe I just fed yours too much.”
“You gave us your love,” he mumbles against your skin, eyes closed as he breathes in your scent. “Your acceptance, you didn’t feed our darkness baby, you just didn’t see the extent of it.”
—
The silence is suffocating. Yoongi normally appreciates it but in this situation it was unsettling. They’re all in the living room, some pretending to do their own thing, but no one was paying any attention to anything other than you. Yoongi and Namjoon did so blatantly, Yoongi sitting on the couch away from you but his stare is nowhere else. This didn’t break the rules, you didn’t tell him he couldn’t soak you in with his eyes whenever he wanted.
The others were also very obvious with their glances towards you, Jin was dusting the same spot of the living room over and over. Hoseok flipping through the tv channels with Jungkook sitting beside him, the maknae biting his lips in worry with every peek he took, a habit he hadn’t had since he was a teenager. Taehyung and Jimin uncharacteristically played chess but all the pieces were in the wrong places, arbitrarily moving them just to keep appearances so you didn’t call them out.
And Namjoon… the man was staring daggers into your form. Elbow on his thigh, leaning forward, his chin on his thumb, his finger on his face tapping away on his cheekbone impatiently. He was supposed to be going over the papers in his lap, but they were being scrunched in his other hand. Yoongi thought he looked like a bomb about to explode, and he wasn’t wrong.
“That’s it!” Namjoon almost growls as he slams his file down, standing from his seat while everyone stares in shock at his outburst.
He walks towards you, and you meet his glare but refuse to move from the comfort and safety of the tub chair, you don’t even close your book.
“This ‘break’ is over,” he snarls, gestating with his hands trying to find a conduit for his anger. “Do you understand, little love?”
You look up at him with eyes simmering a fire he only ignited, meeting his glare head on.
“I decide when this break is over,” you say calmly, refusing to fight him at his level.
“No.”
“No?” Your brows scrunch in disbelief and anger, there goes your plan to remain calm. “What do you mean ‘no’?”
You throw your book back into the seat as you rise to meet him eye to eye, although he’s still looking down at you.
“I mean…” he breathes gruffly, grazing his hand with yours at your side. “No.”
“You can’t b-“
Your voice is smothered by his lips, his soft touch turning into an iron grip as he pulls you closer, devouring you like a man starved and in his eyes that’s exactly what he was. You push him away, but he doesn’t allow for any space between you.
Even when you’re banging your fist against his chest, unable to breathe, he doesn’t budge. You’re at his mercy, only when he decides he’s had enough (for now), does he pull away.
You look dishevelled almost, breathing hard, your eyes glistening with tears. The sight shouldn’t arouse him but it does.
You have the audacity to childishly wipe his kiss away with the back of your hand, a tough swipe that does nothing to erase the force he handled you with. He chuckles, the sound makes your ears burn, feeling the warmth of shame colour them in.
The others stare with the jaws wide open, fear settling in that this was taking too many steps in the wrong direction. It takes everything not to call you back when you storm away, it takes everything not to follow.
No one says a word, but they all glare accusingly at their leader except Taehyung, who only looks down in shame.
—
“Where do you think you’re going?” Yoongi asks gruffly, sleep still in his voice.
“Out.” You respond bluntly, avoiding his gaze.
“I asked where,” he pushes when you pull Taehyung’s hoodie over your head. You were drowning in the fabric, and he pretended the sight didn’t make him ache for you. The same way you were trying so hard not to let his sleepy state bring down your defences, no matter how cute he looked in the shorts and grey top.
“What does it look like Yoongi,” your head was spinning with too many thoughts and you needed to clear it. “For a run.”
“I’ll come with you,” he says it like an offer but it’s not, you know it’s not.
“No,” you refuse simply, finally meeting his stare. “Send one of your men to keep an eye on me, it's what you did before anyway.”
He’s quiet, observing you for a moment. You hated it when he did that, it was like he could see inside of you and yet, despite that, you felt like he couldn’t understand anything he saw. You break eye contact first, putting on your trainers while he continues to stare. Why couldn’t you read him the same, how could he still get under your skin with his silence even after all this time?
“I’ll send Jungkook,” he says as you open the door. “He’ll keep his distance.”
He doesn’t take the slam as you leave personally, he knows you just need to vent your frustrations, but because you were so isolated- sorry, because they isolated you, you had no one to vent to, no one who was objective to talk to. Physically stretching your mind would maybe do you some good.
“Did you seriously let her go out unsupervised?” Namjoon seethes as he approaches Yoongi, quick to dial one of their men regardless of what nefarious time of the morning it was. The first call goes to voicemail.
Yoongi sighs, he was on his way back to bed, guess not.
“She deserves our trust,” he replies. “And I was about to send Jungkook.”
“It’s not about trust,” Namjoon bites back, another call unanswered, “it’s about safety, or are you forgetting our enemies hunt our weaknesses.”
“Our enemies know if they touch her they’ve signed their own death certificate, no one would dare cross us now, not with the amount of blood we’ve shed,” Yoongi groans in aggravation. “Not to mention you’ve bought out the police Namjoon.”
“But not every policeman, or Captain, or are you forgetting what we did to him?”
“You gave him a warning, he’ll behave,” Yoongi states, ready to leave the conversation but he can’t help himself with what he says next. After Namjoon’s actions last night, he was feeling a little vengeful, even if he didn’t completely mean his words. “We should’ve left him unharmed, we knew she didn’t want us to hurt him.”
The shock in Namjoon’s eyes flashes for a second before they compose themselves to a stare. He puts his phone back in his pocket, maybe Jungkook was the best one to go, you didn’t seem to punish him as harshly as the others.
The silence between the men turns the air cold, their gazes stoic but speaking volumes. Namjoon wouldn’t stand for mutiny or disloyalty, he especially didn’t stand for anyone questioning his decisions.
“He hurt her,” he explains himself patiently, “he wants to take her away from us.”
Yoongi scoffs, a humourless grin on his face as he stares back in ridicule at their leader.
“We hurt her,” he states, eyes blank of emotion, “where’s our bullet to the knees.”
—
If you were being honest with yourself, you hated running, you hated the way each breath burned as it filled your lungs, how each limb could feel like lead, but the pain was better than the thoughts you were trying to clear.
You remember at the police academy, Suho and Kai used to run circles around you, but somewhere along the way your competitiveness got the better of you, and you trained harder than them both. It used to annoy you to hell that they were physically much stronger than you, but those days were some of the best. The three of you were so close, each other’s confidants when things went sour, the two you’d hang out with when a case went wrong. Now who did you have to confide in?
Maybe it’s your conscious or unconscious thoughts making your legs move in a particular direction, but you don’t realise where you’re headed until you see the sign above the door. The breakfast place… where everything went to shit a third time.
You barely glance inside as you run past but the sight of someone familiar makes you double take. Think of the devil and he appears?
His eyes catch yours when you stop in your tracks, he’s sitting at a table alone and the sight of him brings back that day like a breath after being underwater for so long. An apology is at the tip of your tongue, your eyes start to water, you know you have to keep running, if any of them finds you here with him, he’d be dead. You’re about to turn away when he waves at you, a simple smile that didn’t meet his eyes sent your way as he watches the realisation hit you.
His hand was covered in thick bandages, and your stare doesn’t leave them. There’s no thought in your mind as your legs move you into the building, ignoring the waiter's greeting as you walk towards your old Captain with dread.
He shifts in his seat, letting you see the bandages on his leg, around his knee, the crutches resting on the seat next to him. Your eyes are wide with shock before your gaze turns into one of mournful rage. Tears start forming in your eyes as you shake.
The sense of betrayal that overwhelms you has you reaching a hand for the table, gripping the edge tight to steady yourself.
They lied.
They looked you in the eyes and lied. All of them, including Jungkook. You don’t let yourself sob, not when a fire burns any attachment you felt towards them to dust.
You move your gaze from his injuries to his face, his stare never having left you.
“Arrest them,” your voice is hoarse but without a morsel of regret, anger paving the way forward now, filling the loss you felt deep inside of you.
They must’ve thought you were fucking stupid, they must’ve laughed behind your back, humoring you with their acts of trying to change. Fuck, you were a fool, they played you again and again and you just took it every fucking time. There was never going to be any change, and you refused to be their prisoner any longer.
“I’ll be your witness,” you say it with conviction, although a part of you grieves. “I’ll give you all the evidence you need, just send them away.”
Suho doesn’t say a word, and that makes it all so much worse. You can feel something creeping around you, shadows of them that have latched onto you, crawling all over your skin. You wanted rid of this dark energy, you wanted out.
You don’t break his stare, not for a second, you can tell he’s deep in thought, contemplating your resolve, and if he saw a hint of uncertainty in you he would do no such thing. Why would he risk it? They hurt him, they could hurt him again.
He reaches for his phone, and you take a premature breath of relief.
“Make the call,” he commands, handing the device to you.
—
When Yoongi dragged Jungkook out of bed this morning, the maknae had begrudgingly crawled out of the house. His body ran on autopilot when he left to find you, eyes half open, yawning in the morning air. His hoodie pushes his hair to fall in his face but he’s too tired to drag the fabric back.
It wouldn’t take long to find you, he could run circles around you if he wanted but the thought of maybe spending some time with you alone made his legs pick up the pace, a goofy grin on his face as he thought about it.
Yes you were probably mad about Namjoon’s actions yesterday, not that Jungkook blamed him all that much, it was hard to stay away from you, but he was starting to understand your perspective a little more. Especially after the last time you pulled away, and he couldn’t let that happen again, he wouldn’t survive it another time. He wouldn’t blame you if you gave him the cold shoulder, he just hopes you don’t punish him because of Namjoon, deflecting your anger wherever it did damage.
He’d calm you down, he’s sure of it. He’d tell you that what their big bad boss did was wrong and he was on your side, he’d tell you that he loved you and respected you, and it didn’t matter how long you took to forgive them he was sure the relationship would heal.
He’s so lost in thought he doesn’t realise how far he’s travelled, it’s only when there’s still no sight of you his grin begins to fade. He should’ve caught up to you by now, this was the route you normally take, and you knew better than to go another way.
What if… no. You wouldn’t dare leave again, you wouldn’t. Jungkook breaks into a sprint, running every route he can think of, not stopping for a moment even when his lungs and legs burn. He’s looking round like a mad man, but he can’t find you. What if something happened? What if someone got to you or hurt you? Memories flash in his mind to long, long ago when that was almost the case. What if?
Shit. A hand to his pocket tells him he’s left his phone, he couldn’t contact the others to join him. His best decision was to get back to the house asap. Jin would still have the tracker on your phone, they would find you, it was all going to be fine.
The fear that seized his heart was not fooled by such idealistic thoughts, his eyes had seen the true brutality of the world, sometimes caused by his own hands, and now his mind played a myriad of images of his little love in all the situations of pain he caused others. He always wondered if karma would catch him one day, he never thought it would take you.
—
He slams the door open so hard it struggles to stay on the hinges.
“I CAN’T FIND HER!” He yells into the open space of the home with all the air in his lungs.
It doesn’t take long for the hoard to assemble.
“What do you mean you can’t find her?” Jin yells back, reaching for his phone to track you without prompt.
Jungkook doesn’t miss the way Namjoon glares at Yoongi, the shorter man ignoring him.
“She’s probably taken another route,” he says calmly.
“You better hope that’s all,” Namjoon says through gritted teeth.
“What if someone’s got her?” Jimin panics.
“No,” Hoseok shuts that idea down, “everyone knows there is nowhere in Seoul to hide from us.”
“There’s always one idiot that’s willing to try, or have you forgotten the last time someone tried to take her?” Taehyung says heatedly.
“And we know how that ended,” Hoseok growls back.
The bickering among themselves grows in volume, so loud that they almost miss what Jin says.
“What?” It’s Yoongi that dares to ask him to repeat himself, the drumming in his ears drowning the words. He must’ve misheard…
“She’s at the police station,” there’s no mistaking it this time. Jin looks solemnly at Namjoon while all their heads spiral.
“She’s not gone there of her own will,” Yoongi shakes his head in denial, “they’ve arrested her or something.”
Namjoon says eerily quiet, his breathing hard, his jaw clenched.
“Namjoon we own the police,” Hoseok pushes, “make a fucking call see why she’s there.”
“Fuck making a call! I’m going over there,” Jungkook announces, turning back to the front door, but the sight of a police van pulling up at their mansion makes him stop in his tracks.
“Are they dropping her home,” Jimin asks stupidly, unable to comprehend why else they would be there.
The older four men look at eachother knowingly.
“Should we run?” Jin asks, making Taehyung and Jimin whip their heads to stare at him incredulously.
“Why would we run?” Namjoon breaks his silence, “they’ll take us right to her.”
As if on queue a smoke grenade rolls into the room, blasting off within seconds, covering the air. Namjoon almost laughs, they sent the fucking swat team, how ridiculous when they could’ve settled this like gentlemen.
Bodies swarm in, yelling commands and they all fall to their knees as instructed. On any other day, if you were home, these men wouldn’t make it through the door, but Namjoon was right, they were a one way ticket to finding you.
#this chapter has very little Namjoon (although I feel he makes an impact) but that’s okay the next chapter is Namjoon centric#bts au#bts fanfic#bts x reader#bts angst#bts ot7 x reader#bts yandere!au#bts yandere#yandere bts#bts imagines#bts writing#bts mafia!au#bts mafia series#bts mafia au#namjoon mafia au#yandere namjoon#yandere seokjin#jin x you#yandere yoongi#yoongi au#yandere hoseok#hoseok mafia au#hobi au#jimin x you#yandere jimin#taehyung x reader#yandere taehyung#jungkook x reader#jungkook mafia#yandere jungkook
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Trouvaille - Chapter Sixteen (M)
Pairing(s); BTS OT7 x Reader
Genre/Themes; Hybrid!AU, themes of the supernatural and the occult, religious themes, violence, hurt/comfort, horror, romance
Rated; 18+ for swearing, violence/gore, future sexual themes. Reader discretion is advised.
Word Count; 20.5k
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Updates on the 7th of each month
Heyyyy besties LOL! Prepare yourselves! This chapter is definitely my spiciest yet, so hold onto your seats (and don't look at me LOL I'm Seokjin thirsty). Besides that, though, we have domestic moments, and GHOSTBUSTING WOO HOO! I hope you all enjoy this and don't hate me for being thirsty. Love to hear your thoughts and thank you for reading!
As an additional warning/reminder, for the smut: the scene is explicit, and is only intended to be read by those over the age of 18. Please practice safe sex, and readers please have discretion!
Previous Chapter
Suddenly, all of the sounds of the city faded into oblivion. Cars rushing by passed in colored blurs, romantic music flooding out from restaurants filled with couples celebrating Valentine’s Day dimmed to a hum, and all Y/N could focus on, or even register, were the clumps of powdery snow beginning to gather on Seokjin’s long, straight lashes. His fiery eyes were shifting back and forth, assessing the expression on her face, his sleek black tail curling self-consciously around his waist. Y/N’s brain was scrambling for any kind of coherent response, Seokjin’s grip on her hands going slack once the seconds stretched on.
“Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything,” Seokjin whispered sadly, to himself. It was that statement that had Y/N snapping out of her state of shock.
“Jin–” Y/N exclaimed, but Seokjin had let her go, turning slightly and trudging away, his hand tightening around the handles of the shopping bag. “Wait, honey!”
“We should head back to the car, it’s getting cold with the snow,” Seokjin’s voice sounded thick, like his throat was closing up, making Y/N hiss and lurch forward, catching him by his felt coat. Promptly, he halted, though he wouldn’t turn around to face her.
“Actually, we should talk,” Y/N managed, pulling Seokjin along desperately, yanking him up the stairs of the church they were in front of and pushing the two of them inside the warm building.
The place was lit up, but mercifully empty, and Y/N assumed the priests were in the back of the building, a separate room, where they kept vestments– Jeongguk had been telling her about various aspects of Christianity and the architecture of churches during their hours of reviewing tapes for the Sanders’ case with Namjoon. Huffing, she towed her jaguar hybrid to the enclosed room at the front of the church’s entrance, the one with a window facing altar; the space was intended for parents with crying children to sit in so as not to disturb Mass. Y/N thought it was as good of a place as any to have a private conversation without freezing their asses off in the snow.
“W-why are we here?” Seokjin still wouldn’t turn his face to hers, instead choosing to studiously stare out the window, fixing his eyes on the elaborate wooden pulpit.
“Seokjin, look at me,” Y/N requested gently, tugging the fabric of his coat lightly to encourage him.
Stiffening, Seokjin swallowed, his ears still pressed flat against his wavy head of black hair, chewing on his lip as he finally looked her in the eyes once more. Heart clenching seeing the aching vulnerability on his face, she took the bag of their purchases from Eataly from his hand, placing it on one of the chairs behind them.
“You don’t have to let me down gently, Y/N…” Seokjin uttered quietly, and despite herself, Y/N was rolling her eyes while her back was to him.
“Seokjin, will you just hear me out for a few minutes?” Y/N replied, trying to compose herself despite the way she was nearly ready to pounce on Seokjin. “Don’t shut down on me like that.”
Seokjin remained quiet, his throat bobbing when she faced him again, Y/N sighing and wondering how the hell to explain to him her feelings, not only for him, but for the rest of his housemates. It had her head swimming, and the strong scent of church incense wasn’t helping.
“You… said you loved me?” Y/N wanted to confirm, Seokjin’s neck turning an even deeper shade of red, but he nodded slightly nonetheless. His tail was still curled around his waist.
“Ever since my birthday. Probably even before then,” Seokjin admitted, Y/N’s heart beginning to race in her chest, one of Seokjin’s ears fluttering at the sound.
“Oh,” Y/N squeaked, watching Seokjin trying to not look crestfallen.
“I had to tell you. I couldn’t keep it hidden any longer, especially after tonight,” Seokjin continued, one of his hands coming up to rub at his bicep. “Even though… you and Yoongi.”
Time stopped, space ceased to exist. All that mattered to her in those seconds was Seokjin, and his undiluted earnesty was palpable. Nothing could stop Y/N from opening her mouth impulsively, at that point.
“I think I fell in love with you on Halloween,” Y/N blurted loudly, Seokjin’s jaw dropping open in pure shock, her voice echoing in the empty room and emphasizing the ferociousness in her tone. “Seeing you with the kids, handing out candy. Or maybe it was that night you held me after Tae and Joon’s fight.”
“What?” Seokjin breathed, a combination of elation and confusion taking over his expression.
“I fell in love with Yoongi when he offered to teach me piano,” Y/N couldn’t help the word vomit pouring from her mouth, figuring if anything, she could confess all of her feelings to Seokjin, and maybe he’d get where she was coming from. “Jeongguk and Joon when they helped me with the spirit, that day outside when we did the cleansing ritual, I knew I loved them. I fell for Hoseok when I realized he was the glue holding us together.”
Understanding dawned on Seokjin as she spilled her guts to him, but all he did was reach for her hands, a tender look in his eyes so sweet Y/N nearly began to weep. Honestly, she could have been weeping, but she couldn’t stop her speech as Seokjin held her.
“Seeing Jimin wear his expressions so earnestly, innocently, and Taehyung’s trust in me, his love for our home…” Y/N shuddered when Seokjin pulled her in for a hug, her face pressed against the front of his coat, and palms stroking up and down her back to soothe. “I’m in love with you all, I can’t help it, but I do. I love you, Seokjin, so, so much.”
Seokjin didn’t reply, but his chest began to vibrate with purrs, simply holding her as Y/N took a few moments to breathe, initially not coming to the conclusion that saying all of that out loud would end up being such an emotional release for her. Physically, she felt lighter once she admitted all of that to Seokjin, but she was nervous about how he was taking the news that she had feelings for 6 others.
“You really love me? You mean it?” Seokjin broke the silence, his hands shaking as he pushed lightly on her shoulders so he could look at her face, his ears finally perked up after being pressed flat to his head for so long.
Grasping one of his wrists, Y/N maintained eye-contact as she pressed his palm over her heart, no doubt beating rapidly even underneath her thick coat. A small exhale came from Seokjin, Y/N craning her head upwards to scan his face, not wanting to keep him in the lurch any longer.
“Of course I mean it,” Y/N whispered, her free hand curling in the material of his coat, feeling tears gather along her lash line. “You have my heart.”
Seokjin chuckled, the sound watery, and Y/N felt his hands still trembling as they moved to cup her face, thumbs tracing over her cheekbones with reverence. She shivered, sliding her hands up his chest to rest over his heart, beating wildly, drowning in the scent of his eucalyptus body wash.
“I–” Seokjin swallowed, his own eyes shining with unshed tears. “Can I kiss you?”
Heart stopping altogether, her eyelids fluttered as she felt his shaky hands still cradling her face, so gently she could hardly feel the touch.
“Yes,” Y/N replied eagerly, her voice barely coming out at all, transfixed by the way Seokjin looked at her with complete adoration. “Please.”
Slowly, like time had been suspended, she watched Seokjin duck his head, his eyelids growing heavy as he nudged the tip of his nose against hers, Y/N unable to shut her eyes as his beautiful face neared closer than ever. Sucking in a tiny breath, she melted against his broad chest, fingers sliding into the close-cropped hair at the nape of his neck. When Seokjin’s eyes closed, she kept hers open a fraction, only for stars to explode in her vision once his voluminous lips landed on hers.
Immediately making a noise of delight, Y/N sank into Seokjin, not caring that they were in public, or a church, for that matter. The press of his mouth was impossibly sweet, loving, Y/N nearly groaning as his lower lip slipped against the seam of her mouth. While the kiss was chaste, Seokjin’s thumbs still tenderly caressing her cheekbones, it had her insides igniting, angling her head so Seokjin could work his mouth against hers more deeply. Her lungs were burning for oxygen all too soon, Y/N refusing to break the lock of their lips, but unfortunately, her jaguar hybrid sensed her need to breathe, and his perfect lips slid from hers sensually.
Before she could speak, her hands still in his hair, Seokjin began stamping kisses all over her face, like he had the last time he scented her. The purrs coming from his chest grew in volume when she sighed in bliss, Seokjin’s hands moving to cup her neck while he brushed a kiss over her jaw bone.
“I love you, I love you…” Seokjin breathed, his warm breath washing over the side of her neck, Y/N nearly passing out in his strong arms. “My Y/N. My pretty girl, I love you…”
“S-seokjin. Mmm,” Y/N attempted to speak, though the distraction of him mouthing over the slope of her throat was overwhelming. “You, uh? Know– that I, um. Love the others, too? Does it bother you?”
Seokjin paused, pressing one last kiss underneath her earlobe, his arms wrapping around her waist securely. His warmth consumed her, and the way he held her felt like she was being cherished– her own arms wound around his wide shoulders in retribution.
“There’s nothing you could do or say that would change how I feel,” Seokjin said firmly, Y/N shivering at the finality in his tone. “I just… I didn’t think you loved me the way I love you. I had hope when we had lunch with Hannah, but…”
“Yoongi,” Y/N finished for him, nuzzling her face into his chest.
“Does he?” Seokjin probed cautiously, running his hands through her hair, seemingly not able to get enough of touching her so freely.
“Know? Yeah,” Y/N blushed, the whole situation so complicated, she hardly knew how it came to be in the first place. “He knows I love you. All of you.”
Seokjin rested his chin on the top of her head, humming contentedly as he held her. All she wanted in that moment was to remain in his embrace, soaking in his comforting presence, but all too soon he was drawing away, his eyes sparkling and lips a tad swollen from their kiss.
“I think we should head home. We scandalized the priests,” Seokjin nodded to the window, Y/N’s face on fire when she realized indeed, two young priests were gawking at them from behind the glass, and both of them hurriedly returned to arranging pamphlets in the pews.
With that, her and Seokjin giggling the entire way, they left the church, Y/N waving apologetically to the priests while Seokjin grabbed onto her free hand. Y/N didn’t have time to think about what would happen when they got home, but because she swore to herself that she wouldn’t hide information from the others anymore, she wasn’t about to sneak around with Seokjin like she had with Yoongi.
Outside, it was still snowing, but tucked closely into Seokjin’s side, she hardly felt the cold. His arm was around her waist, hand entwined with hers, tucked into her coat pocket. The walk back to the parking garage wasn’t long, but it took twenty minutes– Seokjin stopping occasionally for a kiss amongst the snow storm, his lips melting against hers.
“Got the bag?” Y/N jumped out of the car, glancing at their lit-up house in front of her, chewing her lip nervously.
It wasn’t too late in the evening, so Y/N knew that everyone was probably still up, snacking on their Valentine candy and watching TV, perhaps. Namjoon’s van wasn’t running, surprisingly, so neither he nor Jeongguk were hanging out in there. Seokjin appeared from around the car, the bag of ingredients and recipes in hand, a sweet smile stretched across his face.
Someone flicked on the porch light, most likely Namjoon, who kept quite the canine watch over the front door, especially at night. Clearing her throat, she gestured for Seokjin to head up the porch steps, following closely behind and praying the wolf hybrid wouldn’t immediately sniff out that her and Seokjin’s relationship dynamic had shifted significantly. The jaguar hybrid opened the front door, letting Y/N in first, locking up behind her promptly– if he didn’t, Namjoon would have had a stroke seeing the deadbolt pulled back.
The house was toasty, and judging by the scent, Yoongi had made his popular roasted chicken for dinner for everyone that was left at home. She was blushing as Seokjin unzipped her coat for her, shucking it off and hanging it in the closet, the sounds of the TV from the parlor indicating that a few of the hybrids were hanging out in there.
“You’re back,” Yoongi appeared from the kitchen, leaning against the threshold with a dish rag in his hand. “I thought I’d have to call a cab for you two.”
“No, we took a walk to digest the wine before I got behind the wheel,” Y/N replied, Yoongi smirking when Seokjin was fussing over lint on her sweater from her coat, his fingertips skimming her arms and sides and leaving a trail of fire in their wake. “Hope there’s leftover chicken for my lunch tomorrow!”
“You know there isn’t, even without you and Jin eating your fill,” Yoongi scoffed, flicking long hair out of his face. The front of his white tee-shirt was damp from doing dishes, the material clinging to the muscles of his lower abdomen. “Here, let me take that.”
Yoongi sprung forward, taking the Eataly bag from Seokjin, and Y/N didn’t miss the way Yoongi subtly sniffed in her direction, his expression turning sly as he returned to the kitchen with the swish of his spotted tail. Stiffening, knowing that Yoongi could probably detect Seokjin’s scent all over her, as well as her uneasy expression, Y/N pinched the bridge of her nose.
“How the hell are we going to break the news without me suffering from a heart attack?” Y/N sighed, shivering when Seokjin cupped the nape of her neck, stroking the sides of her throat, Y/N blinking up at him from her spot in front of the jaguar hybrid, unease heighting when she saw the mischief on his face. “What are you–”
“I LOVE Y/N!” Seokjin suddenly hollered at the top of his lungs, Y/N flinching a foot in the air, both because she never heard Seokjin speak so loudly, and the words that came from his mouth. “SHE LOVES ME BACK!”
Cringing, Y/N supposed that was one way to do it, Seokjin bending suddenly and picking Y/N up by her waist, spinning her around like a giant goober. While her world was turning, dizzying up her head, she caught Jeongguk and the shape of his antlers, poking his head over the bannister from upstairs with a hand pressed over his mouth and his shoulders shaking. Prick.
Hoseok barreled into the foyer from the parlor, half of a Twizzler hanging out of his mouth, clever eyes round and filled with joy.
“No way. You told her!?” Hoseok fist-bumped the air, whistling his three-note tone, russet tail swinging merrily. Y/N’s jaw was loose, the idea that Seokjin had been discussing his feelings for her with Hoseok hard to fathom.
Namjoon’s door cracked open a few inches, his eyebrow raised in curiosity as he glanced out into the hall, his glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose. Despite the news, his gaze went straight to the front door, making sure it was locked up, his half-bitten ear fluttering in satisfaction.
“Didn’t strike me as the polyamorous type, kiddo,” Jeongguk slouched down the stairs, tattoos on both his arms exposed with the muscle tee he was wearing. “You on the other hand, Pink Panther, you should work on subtlety.”
Embarrassed by the jab from Jeongguk, an amused glitter in his black eyes, Y/N shot him a withering glare, very aware of Seokjin still holding her mid-air like a child.
“Yo, Yoongi! You have competition!” Hoseok shouted in the direction of the kitchen, the leopard hybrid popping into the hall and giving Hoseok the finger.
“Foxy, I’ve never heard a voice as grating as yours, let alone known someone to flap their gums so much,” Yoongi seethed, though his expression softened when he looked at Y/N. The silent exchange between the two was, as always, supernatural, the uneven set of Yoongi’s mouth almost telling her congratulations. “Leave Y/N alone, you’re embarrassing her.”
Hoseok finished chewing his Twizzler, still staring at Seokjin proudly, Y/N tapping on Seokjin’s shoulders for him to put her down sheepishly. Seokjin, reluctantly, lowered her to the floor, glee still plain as day on his face.
“You guys could have a thr—” Hoseok was cut off when Yoongi used the dish rag he was still holding to smack the back of the fox hybrid’s head, even Seokjin offering Hoseok a low, feral growl. “Nevermind! I’ll butt out! Y/N, come watch Step Brothers with me!”
Hoseok, quick to recover from the sharp whack of the towel, his hand massaging his scalp with a wince, gestured towards the parlor, winking at Y/N merrily. Y/N snorted, hoping that the shameful spark of enticement that struck through her at that idea was undetected by the hybrids in the foyer. Jeongguk was calling Hoseok a ‘dirty goddamn pervert’ before retreating outside for a smoke.
Casting a look upstairs, Y/N noticed Taehyung’s door ajar, the Kodiak hybrid’s head of dark curly hair visible. Too far away to gauge his reaction, Y/N hoped that he wasn’t upset, even though Seokjin had cut right to the chase, declared their mutual affection, and they weren’t sneaking around. She felt immensely awkward, between Yoongi and Hoseok still bickering, Taehyung watching from upstairs, and Namjoon’s disinterested retreat back into his bedroom.
“Wanna go watch the movie with me?” Y/N put her focus on Seokjin, unwilling to part with him just yet, and truthfully, missing Hoseok like a lost limb. “I can stay up for a bit longer before I head to bed for work tomorrow.”
“Mmm-hm,” Seokjin easily agreed, the peeved look on his face disappearing when Y/N reached for his hand. Before they left for the parlor, Y/N addressed Yoongi, who was heading back into the kitchen, murmuring something about “fuckin’ fox”.
“Hey, angel. Any idea where Jimin is?” Y/N tried to pay no mind to Seokjin pressing on the vulnerable skin of the inside of her wrist with his thumb, Yoongi humming and leaning forward, kissing her cheekbone with a featherlight ghost of his lips.
“His room, showering. Can’t you hear the noisy-ass pipes?” Yoongi replied, jutting his chin forward in the direction of Jimin’s room down the hall. “Don’t worry. Every hybrid in a two mile radius heard Seokjin’s declaration.”
“Ass,” Y/N muttered, narrowly dodging the dish towel he twisted up to level a smack to her behind, Seokjin growling gutturally and tugging Y/N towards the parlor, ignoring Yoongi’s amused snickers.
Hoseok was already comfortable on the recliner, the movie queued up, snacking on his Twizzlers with a wry smirk on his face, staring pointedly at her and Seokjin’s intertwined fingers. Resisting the urge to wipe that smirk off his face with her mouth, Y/N squeaked when Seokjin yanked on her hand, the jaguar hybrid plopping down on the couch with her in tow. Somehow, she found her legs draped over his lap, her back leaning on the armrest and his hands running up and down her calves indulgently. It seemed Seokjin was resuming his touchiness, and that time around, he jacked up the intensity to one thousand.
Hoseok simply played the movie, like her and Seokjin sitting like that was completely ordinary, Y/N finding herself a little tense with the intimacy of the position she was in. However, as seconds ticked by and Seokjin’s fingertips massaged her skin vigorously, she was melting into the couch, eyes already heavy with sleep. Over the noise of the movie, Seokjin’s content purrs lulled her to sleep, and the next time she had consciousness was when she felt him gather her in his arms and carry her to her bedroom.
“I think we’re going to schedule the investigation for Monday, do you think that will work?” Y/N was in the process of stacking a new batch of Labradorite onto the crystal table at the shop, Judy helping her with her silver bangles jangling.
“You’ll have to give Erika a call, and I’ll book the hotel that the family will stay in overnight,” Judy replied, blowing sandy hair out of her face.
Y/N had about one million things going on in her life at that point, but prioritizing the investigation was at the near top of the list. First, of course, was Hoseok’s birthday that upcoming Saturday, and Y/N had finally managed to plan what they were doing after squeezing it out of him. That aside, she hadn’t seen hide nor hair of Jimin in 24 hours, the coyote hybrid was already outside with the horses before she went to work that morning, so Y/N had no idea what he thought of her and Seokjin yet. Taehyung, at least, was present for her early breakfast with Yoongi, and didn’t appear upset at all, which had her and Yoongi exchanging secret looks of pure disbelief.
“Y/N? Did you hear me?” Judy snapped her out of her thoughts, a kind smile on her face when Y/N realized she was staring blankly at a slab of rose quartz.
“O-oh, no, I’m so sorry. I have a lot on my mind, my bad,” Y/N stuttered, Judy nodding while adjusting the way a sphere of Labradorite was sitting in a shallow bowl, so the flash of blue in the crystal was sparkling just right. “What did you say?”
“Not to worry, Y/N. I was just asking about your hybrids… that reading I gave you many months ago. Have you seen any truth in it?”
It was common for Judy to speak like that, as if she didn’t have psychic ability, but it didn’t bother Y/N at all. In fact, she preferred Judy’s way of going about divination rather than her mother’s tactic of going behind her back or blurting out her random premonitions without warning.
“I…” Y/N fumbled with the box in front of her, accidentally dropping the rose quartz point she was holding. “I took some notes, like you suggested. I was able to connect the cards to each of them.”
“Really?” Judy exclaimed, excitement lighting up her green eyes, though the tug at the corner of her mouth told Y/N her boss knew as much.
“Considering my boy’s pasts, when you gave me that reading at the time, I was sort of against the idea of entertaining any kind of romance between us. I wanted them to feel safe enough to start living their lives how they wanted. But I couldn’t help…”
“Falling?” Judy raised an eyebrow, her smile kind and sincere.
“Yeah, more like I hurtled myself off the cliff of no return,” Y/N joked, thoughts going to Seokjin, who sent her off that morning with dozens of kisses peppered across her cheeks. She thought of Yoongi, who got up extra early to make more chicken for her lunch. How Taehyung would snap pictures of her when she wasn’t looking, Namjoon’s thoughtful nightly book recommendations.
“Good to know that my readings are still accurate,” Judy was amused, placing another crystal on the table with a chuckle. “That’s why you’ve been so chipper these days. A couple of months ago you seemed very stressed out.”
“I’m still figuring things out. Two of them reciprocate my feelings, so far,” Y/N mumbled quietly, somehow finding it nice to confide in her boss. Her mother would be way too excited to talk about her and the boys.
“Is one of them part of our new investigation team?” Judy got to her feet, dusting off her maxi skirt. “That wolf hybrid seemed quite protective of you that day you brought him here in August.”
Y/N blinked, thinking back to that day– it was the first day she even spoke to Namjoon, the day she brought him home. She shook her head quickly, a pang in her chest, remembering his stoic indifference towards her relationships with Yoongi and Seokjin.
“No, he’s not one of them,” she replied, Judy chuckling once again.
“Stubborn, I remember that from the card I pulled for him.”
“Oh, not to change the subject, but speaking of Namjoon– my wolf hybrid, I mean,” Y/N joined Judy at the counter with the empty cardboard box from the kitchen, chewing her lip. “He’s interested in coming to work with me a few times a week. Would it be okay if I bring him next time I’m here?”
Judy helped her break down the cardboard box, nodding enthusiastically.
“That would be wonderful! We won’t have to haul in these crystal boxes anymore and break our backs. I take it he’s interested in your practice?”
“I think he just likes to get out of the house, and he’s a big reader. Honestly it’s our book collection here that interests him, most likely,” Y/N glanced at her watch, noting that it was time for her lunch break, mouth watering at the thought of Yoongi’s chicken. “He’ll be happy you said yes, thank you so much!”
Judy waved her off like ‘no problem’ heading to the back room. Typically, around lunch, Judy would leave Y/N at the shop and head home if she had no scheduled readings. According to the books, there was no one scheduled for services, so it was likely Judy was on her way out and Y/N would have to lock up later. Humming as she unpacked her lunch, she shot Namjoon a text.
Y/N: Judy says you can come to work with me whenever you want! 🥳
Joonie 🐺: Thanks for asking, I’ll come with you next week.
Namjoon wasn’t much of a texter, so she left it at that, grinning at her lockscreen as she closed it. She tended to rotate wallpapers, but currently, it was the picture of Jimin and Seokjin laughing at Hoseok being chased around by Bandit the rooster. Every time she saw it, it made her snort, her heart warming. Y/N flinched when she got a notification from her banking app, her direct deposit hitting her admittedly semi-drained account. Sighing with relief, as she had spent quite a bit of money on Hoseok’s upcoming birthday, she thought it was all worth it when she glanced at his smiling face on her lockscreen.
“We should go on a date,” Seokjin had his arms wrapped around her waist from behind while she was folding some laundry in her room, his tail winding around her leg and lips in her ear. She dropped the tank top she was holding in surprise, craning her neck so she could look at him.
“You wanna take me on a date, Seokjinnie?” Y/N cooed, prodding at his cheek teasingly. “Where do you want to go, honey?”
Seokjin pursed his lips as he thought, nestling his chin in the crook of her neck. Nearly swooning at how affectionate he had become in just two days, she felt his steady heartbeat flush against her back.
“We don’t even have to go anywhere, pretty. We can stay here, just do something special, the two of us,” Seokjin replied, her cheeks aflame when he called her pretty, but Y/N was reminded of Seokjin’s slight distaste for traveling, so she got what he was trying to say.
“I like the sound of that,” Y/N resumed folding her tank top, already cooking up some ideas for an at-home date for the two of them. “How about next Friday, the 24th. I’ll plan something for the two of us, okay?”
“Mmm,” Seokjin agreed, kissing her temple, regretfully pulling away from her and reaching for the laundry basket to help her out. “Only if you let me plan some things of my own for that night.”
“Of course, love,” Y/N giggled, but her laughter was cut short once she glanced at the jaguar hybrid, who was currently folding a pair of her lacy panties. “Oh my god. Let me fold that!”
Snatching the thong away from him, Y/N wanted to throw up from humiliation, but all Seokjin did was snort, retrieving another pair of panties from the laundry basket– to her mortification.
“You’re acting like I’ve never seen these before. Pretty, don’t you know that we’ve all been folding your underwear for months each time we have laundry duty?” Seokjin was ever so nonchalant, Y/N stupidly realizing that her panties didn’t magically appear in her dresser, when she wasn’t the one to pull them out of the dryer.
“Oh my god,” Y/N face-planted into her mattress, the realization like a bucket of ice water dumped over her head.
She pictured smug Jeongguk in the laundry room, hanging up one of her skimpy bralettes, or worse, utility-grade sports bras on the drying rack, nearly curling into herself in shame. Seokjin patted her back, barely containing his laughter, but all that did was make Y/N want to hide in a hole even more.
“Y/N, you wash our underwear every week, fold it, too. You bought us underwear, you know what they look like. Don’t be so embarrassed,” Seokjin hauled Y/N up by her elbows, clear humor written all over his face, Y/N unsure whether or not she enjoyed it when he teased her so much. “Ooh. I like these ones.”
Seokjin dangled a pair of baby pink panties in front of her face with his forefinger and thumb, the pair with a tiny bow on the waistline, the fabric a mixture of cotton and lace. Absolutely scandalized, Y/N felt both involuntary arousal and annoyance strike through her.
“Okay, now you’re fucking with me,” Y/N bat his hand out of her face, Seokjin’s squeaky laughter filling the room noisily. “Don’t be pervy, Seokjin. It doesn’t suit you!”
“Oh, no?” Seokjin cocked his head, his sleek black ears fluttering as his expression turned sly. “Shame…”
Y/N swore Seokjin’s eyes darkened, and she wondered what he meant by that, hurriedly grabbing her underwear from him and stuffing the garment into her dresser. She heard Seokjin snicker, but he mercifully stopped teasing her, moving on to fold a pair of her pajamas instead, biting his lip.
“Um, so what should we have for dinner tonight?” Y/N changed the subject, trying to block out sudden lewd thoughts surrounding her and Seokjin, her movements jittery.
Seokjin looked like he wanted her for dinner that night, but he managed to compose himself with his gorgeous smile, tucking her pajamas into her drawer beside her. She mentally dared him to make the innuendo that was no doubt floating around his head, but Seokjin didn’t– Y/N hardly knew if she was relieved or disappointed.
“Well, we got those steaks in the fridge Yoongi picked up from the butcher’s shop. Didn’t you show me a recipe for steak with some kind of bourbon sauce?”
“Oh, yeah, I could go for that,” Y/N’s mouth watered, already picturing her plate filled with meat, smashed potatoes, and maybe some crispy green beans.
Seokjin purred, closing up her dresser. Turning, Seokjin reached for her chin, Y/N’s heart pounding harshly in her chest, the jaguar hybrid looking down at her through his eyelashes. Tilting her face up, Seokjin’s hold on her firm but delicate, and involuntarily, her tongue peeked out to moisten her lips while Seokjin’s eyes narrowed as he followed the movement. She was staring at his mouth in a daze, saying huh when he spoke again, not hearing him the first time.
“I said, pretty,” Seokjin’s thumb pressed on her lower lip, his voice lilting and spellbinding like a siren. “If we make that, take it easy on the bourbon, okay? You got sick last time Jimin brought out the whiskey.”
“I forgot about that,” Y/N responded quietly, blush settling over her cheeks when she remembered how Seokjin had to hold her hair back while she spilled her guts into the toilet after one glass, his free hand soothingly rubbing her back when she heaved over the porcelain bowl. “Emb-barassing. At least you still loved me after that, hurling and crying hysterically… what a mess.”
“Hmm…” Seokjin strengthened the hold he had on her chin, his expression a combination of playfulness and reapproach, making her gut tighten. “What do you humans say when you get married? ‘In sickness and in health’?”
Jaw hanging loose, still not used to how deeply Seokjin felt for her, and she was at a loss as to what to say. Appearing smug, Seokjin kissed her forehead softly, continuing to speak when she had no reply.
“Remember, you took care of my fever when you adopted me? I was returning that gesture!”
“I love you,” was all Y/N could think of in response, feeling his tail wind around her waist sensually, Y/N leaning forward and up, capturing his lips in a surprise kiss, Seokjin freezing for a moment before he parted his mouth slightly, kissing her lower lip sweetly.
Seokjin had yet to kiss her in a way that was, well, more heated, but she loved the chaste, adoring kisses that he did offer her infinitely. She whimpered against his mouth when one of his hands landed on her lower back, pulling her closer into his embrace. Seokjin made his own noise of pleasure in response, one that had her stomach flipping over. Before she could deepen their kiss, like always, Seokjin pulled away, his pillowy lips shiny and red. Releasing the hold she had on him– fists curled into the material of his sweater, she pouted at the loss of contact, but Seokjin simply snorted through his nose and shook his head, his eyes sparkling.
“Let’s go, we still have to switch over the laundry before starting on dinner,” Seokjin let go of her, Y/N blinking away her desire, her pout growing deeper.
“Ugh, my muscles are sore. I don’t wanna go back upstairs,” Y/N complained, watching Seokjin scoop up the empty laundry basket, his face becoming contemplative as he assessed her, before he set the basket down again. “Judy had me schlepping in 30 pound boxes of crystals into the store all week.”
“Here, then,” Seokjin turned, bending slightly, motioning for her to get on his back with a cheeky grin. “I’ll carry you up.”
Normally, Y/N would have been embarrassed to take Seokjin up on the offer, but childlike glee welled up in herself instead– not even hesitating to jump on him with a giggle. Seokjin straightened up, adjusting his steady hold around the backs of her knees, giving her a piggyback ride up the stairs to the laundry room happily. Arms draped around her jaguar hybrid’s neck, elated, she indulged in a desire she had been holding onto for months– and planted a kiss on the side of his strong neck, Seokjin shivering beneath her.
Y/N watched Jeongguk lift a heavy box of gadgets into Namjoon’s van, the elk hybrid grunting with the weight of it, Y/N clicking her tongue at him. It may had had been a mistake to give him a bottomless budget to go crazy on ordering equipment, because he had enough of it to film an episode of Ghost Adventures and put Zak Bagans to shame. She supposed, however, that it made him happy and less bratty, and with just two days until the scheduled investigation, she noticed the elated difference in Jeongguk’s attitude.
“So,” Y/N began, hoping that the fact that he had a brand new set of electronics to mess with would loosen him up. “Hoseok’s birthday tonight. We’re all going to go out together, right?”
“Do I really have to spend the evening in a sweaty nightclub with a bunch of drunk and horny humans?” Jeongguk peered over his shoulder with a grimace, scratching one of his tapered ears.
“I spent almost a grand on a fucking table for eight, so yeah, you need to suck it up and put your leather pants on,” Y/N snapped, Jeongguk spinning around and staring at her with shock and contempt. “Seokjin doesn’t like loud noises or crowds and he still agreed to go for Hoseok.”
“Jesus wept, fine,” Jeongguk put his hands up, dark eyes round.
“You’ll have fun. Get wasted and listen to music, two of your favorite things to do,” Y/N soothed, smirking. Jeongguk rolled his eyes, returning to his task, fiddling with some kind of EMF detector that probably burnt a hole into her already slimmed-down wallet. “Where’s Joon?”
“Am I the wolf’s keeper or something?” Jeongguk raised his pierced brow, leaning his hip against the van and humming at the growing annoyance Y/N was feeling towards him. “Check the stable, he wanted to go for a walk, mentioned needing to talk to the coyote. Satisfied, kiddo?”
Muttering, she stormed away from him, peeved that he was laughing heartily at her tantrum. She wanted to similarly check in on Namjoon, who had yet to give a response to the idea of taking a limo and spending their Saturday night in a club for Hoseok. Positive that Namjoon had never stepped foot in a place like the club she had booked, she wanted to show him a few pictures so he’d have an idea of what he’d be walking into.
A couple of weeks prior, she cornered Hoseok, hugging him around his waist and refusing to let go until he picked out what he wanted to do for his birthday. Finally, he agreed to go out to the club, his cheeks red with embarrassment, but Y/N was relieved he told her so she could book a table in advance. The fox hybrid, the morning of his birthday, went out for his long-distance Saturday run, so she didn’t get to see much of him during the afternoon. No doubt, before they left, Hoseok would spend quite a bit of time getting showered and dressed for the occasion.
Wrapping her coat more tightly around her body, she had the stable in sight, the sound of chickens clucking within their coop, a layer of snow collected on the roof of the building. It was likely that Namjoon and Jimin heard and smelled her approach, but she hoped that she caught them off-guard, secretly. Those two particular hybrids were friendly towards each other, but it struck her as odd that Namjoon would have something in specific to discuss with the coyote hybrid.
Pausing by the stable door and peering around it cautiously, she spotted Jimin kneeling besides what appeared to be the early stages of the garden bed constructions, sawdust covering his jeans while he pointed at something. Neither of them glanced her way, Namjoon standing with his back to her, his arms crossed over his chest. Straining her ears, she was able to eavesdrop, astounded that neither of them caught her scent yet.
“–yeah, this smaller one here is for herbs, if that’s what you mean,” Jimin was saying, his sandy tail swishing against the ground.
“Do you think it’s big enough?” Namjoon had skepticism painting his tone.
“Why, you don’t think so? Y/N wanted a small one for cooking herbs,” Jimin was chewing on his lip, light eyebrows pulled together.
“Can you do another medium-sized one? I’ve been doing some research on the types of herbs she’d be able to grow during the summer in this area, there’s quite a few. That way she’ll have a bigger variety for her practice, and we can keep the culinary herbs separate,” Namjoon requested, Y/N clasping a hand over her mouth, blown away that Namjoon would do something so nice for her without her knowing.
“Yeah, I can do that, I have enough extra plywood,” Jimin seemed just as stunned as Y/N, his yellow eyes wide, straightening up and sticking his hands into the pockets of his blue jeans. “You’re going tonight, right?”
“You think I’m going to let Y/N waltz into a nightclub without me? Human men are fucking disgusting. She needs us all,” Namjoon scoffed, Y/N feeling like her head was swimming. “Besides the humans, drugging and assaulting each other, Hoseok is going to cut loose, so will some of the others, so it’s important someone stays relatively sober. That’s why I’m mad at the kid right now, not wanting to tag along.”
“You mean Jeongguk? I think he’ll go, too. He seems like a tough son of a bitch, but he thinks similarly to you. Isn’t that why you’re close? Isn’t that why he was the only one able to calm you down… that night?”
Namjoon’s chest rumbled, his ears turning downwards at the mention of the night he and Taehyung had their altercation.
“I don’t like to think of that night,” Namjoon replied quietly, the constant sway of his tail stilling somberly. “Regardless, I don’t give a shit how Jeongguk feels, I don’t care if I have to drag him by his antlers to the club. He’s going.”
“Y/N spent a lot of money on Hoseok for this,” Jimin scratched his chin sympathetically, strolling to the stack of plywood, his steel-toed boots echoing around the lofty stable. “If he doesn’t go, he’ll make a lot of new enemies around here.”
“Dramatic phrasing,” Namjoon snickered, though as he moved for the first time Y/N had been spying on them, his mouth was in a thin line, evidently agreeing with Jimin. “I wouldn’t say enemies, but between Yoongi, the bear, and Seokjin, grudges would be made.”
Jimin made a noncommittal noise of agreement, Y/N beginning to feel guilty for eavesdropping, and her head was about to explode from the apparent concern Namjoon and Jimin had for her. Y/N was so wrapped up in her own feelings and care for the boys, she forgot to realize that they might hold her well-being in high regard as well.
Backing up a few steps as quietly as she could, she made some clumsy human noises, skipping into the stable like she hadn’t heard anything. She was proud of herself for not giving herself away with a lovestruck look plastered on her face, the fur on Namjoon’s tail standing on end when she barreled into the building, the tips of his ears turning red.
“Hi guys, whatcha up to?” Y/N asked innocently, Jimin blinking and dropping the piece of plywood he was holding.
“Just talking about the garden beds,” Namjoon recovered smoothly, in stark contrast to Jimin’s attempts to seem nonchalant. “What time are we leaving tonight?”
“Ooh, Joonie, you’re going to come?” Y/N continued to play stupid, leaning on one of the empty horse stalls, one that Jimin kept a surplus of hay in. “I think we’ll leave around 9:30. The club doesn’t open until 10 anyways. Jimin, you’ll come too, sweetheart?”
Jimin’s cheeks turned pink, nervously brushing sawdust from his jeans, nodding. It was somewhat hilarious to watch the two of them pretend they weren’t just talking about her, and Y/N wasn’t about to embarrass them by revealing she had been listening on, so she feigned normalcy by picking imaginary lint off of her pink sherpa coat.
“Of course, Y/N,” Jimin blurted, using the toe of his boot to push the plywood he dropped away, one hand gliding through his golden hair. “Wouldn’t miss it!”
Thankfully, once Y/N was able to find Jimin after Seokjin’s declaration the following day when she came home from work, the coyote hybrid had acted totally normal. Having a sneaking suspicion that like Taehyung, and even Seokjin himself, Jimin was a little bit avoidant, she decided if he was going to pretend nothing was different, so would she.
“How are we getting there?” Namjoon cleared his throat, stalking up to her side.
“I ordered a limo. Just about the only vehicle that can get us somewhere all together,” Y/N smirked, Namjoon cocking his head in confusion. Often, she forgot Namjoon wasn’t familiar with things like that. “It’s like a shorter, longer version of your van, kind of. Bench seats and a fridge filled with champagne, and the driver is separated by a partition.”
“Flashy,” Namjoon scoffed, Y/N flicking off a clump of hay clinging to his forearm. “Matches the fox’s personality, I guess.”
“Oh, yeah. There’s a dress code, I figured you two should know that– no athletic wear. Just basic slacks and a nice shirt, essentially.”
“That eliminates half of Hoseok’s wardrobe,” Jimin piped up, his ears twitching when Y/N giggled.
“Yeah, but he cleans up well,” Y/N could hardly wait to see what Hoseok would pull out of his closet– she had zero doubts he’d look drop dead sexy. “Alright, good. Everyone’s on board! I’m gonna go shower and scrounge up something for dinner later.”
“Dress warmly, the temperature is going to drop later,” Namjoon called after her, a frown on his face.
“Can’t make any promises, Joonie,” Y/N sent a wink his way, missing the low growl rumbling through his chest, picturing the dress she had bought for the very occasion and sashaying away.
“She’s going to do as she pleases, isn’t she,” Namjoon muttered to Jimin, who was eyeing the way her hips swayed as she walked, but the wolf hybrid had a wry smile stretching across his face.
Y/N took the opportunity of going out for Hoseok’s birthday to pull out all the stops appearance-wise, and she had to admit to herself, she was doing too well at it. Her makeup was dark and sultry, hair done to utter perfection, and the dress. She saw a picture of it online and bought it so fast she thought her computer was going to catch on fire. Taking a look at herself in the full-length mirror, she admired how lethal her figure looked in the short bodycon dress, legs on display, the off-the-shoulder cut of the neckline showing off the choker Namjoon gave her for Christmas. She was in the middle of strapping her heels around her ankles when a knock came on her door tentatively. Y/N guessed it might have been Taehyung, due to the hesitant sound of the knuckles against the wood.
Heels clicking against the hardwood, she reached the door, taking a deep breath, nervously wondering what Taehyung would think of her outfit– she had never worn something so revealing around the boys and it had her hands shaking on the doorknob. Throwing it open, Taehyung’s sandalwood cologne hit her smack in the face, his carmine eyes nearly bugging out of his head when he saw her. Unable to help himself, his gaze lowered, staring at the way the material of her dress clung to every curve, his lips parting.
“What’s up, Tae?” Y/N blurted, dazzled by his appearance, his dark curls pushed off of his forehead, a silky white button-down with pearls making up the buttons, and straight-leg slacks. Her eyes lingered on the thin gold chain around his throat, her gift to him from Christmas, too bashful to make eye contact all of a sudden.
“The… the car, the car’s here,” Taehyung was dazed, eyes glued to her legs, Y/N’s mouth drying up. “That’s what you’re wearing?”
“Uh, yeah, why? You don’t like it?” Y/N felt her face fall, Taehyung’s throat bobbing when he swallowed urgently, shaking his head.
“N-no, it’s fine,” Taehyung’s strained voice had color pooling in her cheeks, blindly reaching behind her so she could grab her clutch. “I’ll get your coat.”
Taehyung darted away, smoke pretty much coming off of his heels, leaving Y/N stunned. Perhaps she had gone a tad overboard with the sexy dress. That aside, his reaction had hope blooming in her chest; if that was his heated reaction to the way she looked, could it be possible that had at least a semblance of an attraction towards her? Squaring her shoulders at the thought, she marched out into the hall confidently, and when she reached the foyer, most of her boys were hanging out around the stairwell, except for Taehyung, who appeared to be fishing around in the coat closet with stiff posture.
Similar to how they reacted at the cookout when she came out in her sundress, silence swept over the room with her arrival. Jimin’s face was so red she could probably fry an egg on one of his cheeks. Even usually-composed Yoongi’s eyes had gone round, dropping the sports jacket he was holding. Giving her a once over, licking his lips, Yoongi chuckled softly and shook his head.
“Ready to go? Where’s Hoseok?” Y/N was hoping she wasn’t reading smug, Seokjin frowning when he poked his head around Jeongguk’s frame, heat in his gaze but disapproval mixing with it.
“Getting shit from the kitchen,” Jeongguk answered blandly, picking his nails. He tried to be nonchalant, but she caught him looking at her out of the corner of his eye.
“Y/N, it’s really cold outside,” Seokjin narrowed his eyes at her bare legs, adjusting the collar of his black oxford shirt, a few of the buttons undone.
“I know, that’s why my arms are covered,” retorted, gesturing to the long sleeves of the dress. “We won’t be outside for long, anyways, and it gets hot in those clubs.”
Seokjin was entirely unconvinced, watching Taehyung emerge from the coat closet, handing Y/N her longest, thickest coat, barely looking at her while she snickered at his selection. Shrugging it on, aware of all of the attention on herself– and for once, she enjoyed it thoroughly.
“Alright! Got the champagne! Y/N darling, shall we?” Hoseok waltzed in from the kitchen looking all kinds of delicious, in a white suit and a blue silky shirt, a bottle of Moet in one of his hands, using a free one to hook around her elbow and tow her to the front door. “Don’t forget to lock up, wolf!”
Namjoon, waiting by the door, eyeing Y/N’s neck and the choker encircling it, jingled the keys to the house in his fist, and waited for everyone to follow her and Hoseok to the limo waiting outside before he locked up.
Yoongi made it to her free side with a smirk on his face, Y/N admiring the way he styled his long hair. Hoseok was the first one inside of the limo while Yoongi held Y/N’s hand as she slid in herself, brushing a kiss on the back of it.
“You look gorgeous,” Yoongi said proudly, sitting beside her, Y/N nudging him in the ribs with her elbow. “Gonna have to keep my eye on you tonight.”
Hoseok had brought their portable speaker, already jacking up the volume on a rap playlist, grinning wickedly as the rest of the hybrids climbed into the limo. Jeongguk had to pay particular attention to his antlers so he wouldn’t knock them against the ceiling, slouching low on the bench he was on. It was hard not to laugh at his grouchiness as he held onto a champagne flute with a fist, though his saving grace were the leather pants he did indeed put on, highlighting his muscular thighs.
Last one into the limo was Namjoon, cramming himself in between Jeongguk and Seokjin, the latter of which was directly across from Y/N, his expression more feline than ever, Y/N squirming in her seat under the weight of his gaze. To distract herself, she turned to Hoseok, clinking her glass with his, the fox hybrid pinching her cheek happily.
“Happy birthday Hoseok!” Y/N cheered, wrapping an arm around his shoulders for a brief side-hug, careful to not spill her drink on his crisp white sports jacket when the limo started to pull out of the driveway.
Leaning into her playfully, Hoseok turned up the speaker even louder, Y/N enjoying watching her hybrids loosen up, champagne in hands, and looking forward to a new experience. With Seokjin looking at her like that, however, she didn’t know if she’d make it through the night without pushing him against a wall.
Music pulsing from the speakers, Y/N already armed with a cocktail, she once again thought that the hefty price tag on the table she bought was worth it when she sunk into the cushy booth with satisfaction. The club, called “The Grand Boston”, was decorated lavishly, had an enormous bar, and was lit up brilliantly. Besides her own hybrids, several of which were ordering drinks at the bar, Y/N was surprised to see others milling around with their humans, which was relieving– not as many eyes on her and the fact that she had seven of them with her.
“Wanna order a bottle? They have Casamigos, your favorite,” Y/N spoke loudly over the music to her fox hybrid, who was in the middle of taking a shot, his face screwing up as he shoved a lime between his teeth.
“Nah, they jack up the prices, we can just get a few rounds of shots,” Hoseok replied after a moment, smirking at Jimin sliding into the booth, tumbler of whiskey in his hand.
“I mean, we might as well get bottle service, Foxy. It’s your birthday and we have this table,” Y/N rolled her eyes, flagging down someone to order the liquor.
“Oooh, pulling out all the stops for me?” Hoseok teased, flashing her a stunning smile, motioning for Seokjin to join them when the jaguar hybrid returned from the bar with his cocktail, and due to the warm temperature of the club, he had pulled another button loose on his shirt.
With more of his collar bones exposed, Y/N’s mouth involuntarily watered, and to cover it up she immediately poured herself a shot and downed it expertly. Somehow, she felt bad that she was having such thirsty thoughts about sweet Seokjin. Completely oblivious, he placed his arm around her shoulders, offering her a sip of the Moscow mule, angling the black straw to her lips. Then again, the spark in his eye as her lips wrapped around the straw told a different story, one that had the blood boiling in her veins.
“Um, the others?” Y/N broke the trance she was in, addressing Jimin. She could see Jeongguk by the bar, forearms leaning against the counter, Namjoon beside him, both of them in deep conversation that probably surrounded their upcoming investigation on Monday.
“They’re around. Don’t worry, Y/N, they won’t leave without you,” Jimin read her mind, knocking back his drink and watching people head towards the dance floor.
“Alright. Plan is to get wasted and go dance,” Hoseok began lining up shots, Seokjin snorting beside her. “Don’t laugh at me on my birthday, Jinnie. Here. Cheers!”
Y/N watched, praying she wasn’t being creepy, as Seokjin sprinkled salt on the back of his hand, swiping his tongue over the skin, before he hastily took the shot of tequila with a wince, Y/N hurriedly handing him a lime to suck on.
After a couple of rounds of shots, Y/N already feeling the liquor loosen her up and ready to dance, Yoongi joined them with his glass of Hennessy, refusing to touch the Casamigos.
“I can’t do tequila, Foxy. Makes me sick to my fuckin’ stomach,” Yoongi frowned when Hoseok slid the shot glass towards him, Seokjin taking it instead. Jimin, at least, participated, his face getting redder by the minute with all the booze.
“Come on, let’s dance,” Y/N stood, miraculously stable on her heels, hands extended for someone, anyone, to take them, and at once, Hoseok leapt to his feet, palm sliding into hers, motioning for Seokjin to take her free one.
Seokjin got up, somehow handling all of the tequila incredibly well, Y/N giggling as her fox and jaguar hybrids began to lead her to the dance floor.
“I’ll stay here and watch,” Yoongi’s sly expression ticked her off, giving her a once-over from behind his glass. Jimin was off to the bathroom and to refresh his whiskey, Y/N thinking it was likely his last round before he totally blacked out.
Led by Hoseok, who had long since ditched his sports jacket, they weaved through the crowd, Y/N suddenly remembered Seokjin’s aversion to seas of people. Casting him a worried look over her shoulder, Seokjin mouthed ‘I’m fine’, the grip he had on her left hand tightening. She caught something out of the corner of her eye, an extremely sparkly dress a young woman was wearing.
Trying to get a better look at the shimmering fabric, she paused– the woman was apparently flirting with someone, someone Y/N recognized immediately even if it was just the back of his head. Taehyung, who she hadn’t seen since they stopped by the coat check, was talking to a random girl, something that Y/N assumed the Kodiak hybrid would be way too shy to do. Mouth hanging open, drunken jealousy surging through her as she realized Taehyung could sense her presence via scent and didn’t even turn to look at her, his shoulders shaking in laughter as he responded to something the woman said. Again, Seokjin squeezed her hand, spinning the two of them slightly so their backs were to Taehyung, Y/N grateful for Seokjin’s keen perceptivity and consideration.
Facing Hoseok, who finally found a good place in the center of the club, far enough away from the speakers that would blow their eardrums out, Y/N shook away remaining jealousy and focused on the fox hybrid instead, who was doing some kind of silly dance to get her attention. The little number he was doing was in stark contrast to how sexy he looked, his sleeves rolled up over his elbows, eyes slightly lidded from the shots, ears drooping.
“Let’s see what you two got,” Hoseok shouted over the music, and Y/N would have been hesitant if it weren’t for the tequila, but she found herself mirroring Hoseok’s swaying movements, a confident smile on his face. “Come on, Jinnie, weren’t you an acrobat? You must have some moves!”
Y/N shuddered when Seokjin’s chest was suddenly pressed to her back, simply holding her hips while she rolled them, her cheeks on fire while Hoseok cackled, clocking the fluster all over Y/N’s face. It was then, she decided fuck it, both presssing her hips backwards into Seokjin and pulling Hoseok to her by the collar of his shirt, winding her arms around his neck. Seokjin grunted deeply into her ear, his lips grazing the shell of it, while all smug attitude was knocked out of Hoseok in a blink.
“Out of wisecracks? Dance with me,” Y/N challenged, something flashing dangerously in the fox hybrid’s eyes before his hands were on her waist, copying the movements she made, but careful not to collide his hips into hers.
Ben always used to warn her to stay away from the tequila, as she tended to get frisky with a few shots of it coursing through her system, but she didn’t care that night. Not when Seokjin’s grip on her hips was firm, letting her essentially grind backwards into him, and Hoseok was looking at her differently for the first time, the way he moved graceful and precise. The world seemed to fall away into neon lights, hypnotic music, and the two hybrids that she was sandwiched between, Y/N really letting loose by letting her head loll back onto Seokjin’s chest, eyes slipping shut. She was too tipsy to be embarrassed about her behavior, and judging by the dark purrs from behind her and the mirth returning to her fox hybrid’s eyes, the two of them were freely enjoying themselves as well.
“Wanna take another shot,” Y/N murmured after a while, pouting when Hoseok pulled away in favor of watching the light show, his tail swishing, though Seokjin still held her to his chest, his nose tucked into the base of her throat.
“I think you’re good, pretty,” Seokjin replied, squeezing her hips and turning her around, his palms gliding up to cup her waist, the thin material of her dress doing nothing to hide her shape nor the way his touch burned her deliciously. “Don’t want to overdo it now, right?”
Y/N rolled her eyes, leaning up, stamping a kiss on his exposed collarbone in hopes that it would butter him up. His skin was dewy with sweat, Y/N wanting to eat him alive, but she released her hold of his wide shoulders so she could make her way back to the table, and further, the bottle.
“Y/N,” Seokjin’s voice had a sharpened edge of warning to it, following closely behind, navigating through the tipsy crowd. Fortunately, she didn’t come across Taehyung and that girl, but when she remembered the interaction, it only strengthened her desire to hightail it to the table.
“Judas priest, kiddo,” Jeongguk was lazily reclined in the booth, his feet kicked up on one of the tables like he owned the joint, eyes roaming over her flushed skin, mussed hair, and the scent of alcohol coming off of her like a bar floor. “That’s not a good idea–”
Before any of the hybrids could get to her, including Yoongi who lurched forward to snatch the shot glass away and Jimin’s noises of alarm, Y/N had already poured the shot down her throat, not even feeling the burn of the liquor, batting Yoongi’s hands away when he tried to take the glass.
“Alright, sweetheart, that’s enough,” Yoongi scolded, pushing the bottle of tequila towards Jimin, who swiftly tucked it behind him with a worried look. “You’re going to be sick tomorrow.”
“So? I’m celebrating!” Y/N frowned, booping Yoongi’s nose. She wasn’t even slurring, for Christ’s sake, and she could still walk in her heels perfectly. “You’re all being worrywarts, I’m fine.”
“Why don’t you sit for a minute, I’ll have the server bring some snacks around,” Yoongi maneuvered Y/N into the booth, her grumbling the entire time, squirming next to Jeongguk. Seokjin went with Yoongi, both of them moving urgently.
“Fussy babies,” Y/N muttered, scanning the room for Hoseok, Namjoon, and Taehyung, crossing her legs and massaging her sore ankles. “I can hold my liquor.”
“Sometimes,” Jeongguk replied sarcastically, barely looking up from his phone, his fingertips flying over the keyboard. “It’s almost 2 AM. We should go soon, before the club closes.”
“Aw, but did you even get to dance? How about you, Jimin?” Y/N lamented, Hoseok returning from the dance floor, sweat slicking up his forehead when he pushed his damp hair back, a swagger in his step.
“Do I look like I dance, kiddo?” Jeongguk scoffed, draining his glass, setting his phone aside. “Time to head out, fox.”
“Yeah, the crowd is dwindling anyways. I’m ready to raid the fridge and pass out,” Hoseok grabbed his jacket that was slung over the booth, Jimin excusing himself to pay the tab and look for Taehyung.
“We can have some of your birthday cake!” Y/N exclaimed, suddenly less disappointed about going home if it meant she could have something sugary. “Awh, where’s Joon bug? He’ll want some cake too, I wanna tell him!”
“12 ‘o clock, darling,” Hoseok pointed beyond her shoulder, Namjoon trudging back to the booth with his jean jacket pulled around him, Y/N’s coat in his hands. Surprisingly, he seemed like the most sober of the bunch, offering her her coat with purpose.
“I talked to the driver outside, he’s ready when we are,” Namjoon announced, Y/N struggling to shrug her coat on while sitting down, Jeongguk clicking his tongue and helping her right arm through the sleeve.
“What about Tae, though?” To her embarrassment, Y/N’s head began to feel like it was floating, that last shot definitely a mistake like Jeongguk had said, as much as she hated to admit it. Her tongue was heavy in her mouth, and she barely reacted when Yoongi dropped a bag of mini pretzels in her lap, stomach turning at the thought of chewing.
“Already outside, Y/N. Can you walk?” Namjoon made a motion for the rest of the hybrids to start heading towards the door with authority, Seokjin kissing the top of her head before he made sure Hoseok was going in the right direction.
“Yesss, I can walk, Joonie,” Y/N grouched, hauling herself to her feet, but unfortunately, her knees buckled. Cursing, Namjoon caught her swiftly before she could collapse on the floor, strong arms supporting her weight, Y/N limp.
“That’s a no, then,” Namjoon sighed, bending his knees, slinging Y/N over his shoulder in one smooth movement. Y/N squealed, scrabbling for a hold on the back of his jacket and staring at the floor, thankfully not getting violently nauseous as her world was turned upside-down and the wolf hybrid started walking. “Thank god I’m here. I hope you didn’t party like this in college, Y/N, it’s dangerous.”
“I’m currently b-breathing, aren’t I, Joon? Put me down, I’m embarrassed,” Y/N whined, whacking his back with her palms. Namjoon, however, was known to be unyielding. He promptly ignored her complaints, her strikes against his muscled back useless and truthfully, pathetic.
“I don’t know why you insisted on wearing those shoes. Your ankles are swelling,” Namjoon grunted, her heated face meeting some relief in the icy night air, the sounds of drunk clubgoers up and down the sidewalk. “You’re a handful, Y/N.”
“And you’re not, Namjoon?” Y/N squawked, astonished. However, Namjoon chuckled quietly, finally setting her down in front of the waiting limo, one broad palm on her lower back to help keep her upright while climbing in.
“Never claimed I wasn’t,” Namjoon replied offhand, clambering in behind her, the rest of the boys in various states of intoxication and exhaustion. “Are there sick bags in here?”
Namjoon was speaking to Yoongi, who was apparently the only one sober enough to have spatial awareness, even Jeongguk nodding off in the far end of the limo, the leopard hybrid waving a paper bag in front of Namjoon’s face. Jimin, Hoseok, and Seokjin were cracking open another bottle of champagne, while Taehyung was busy on his phone, presumably texting; Y/N dreaded to know exactly who.
“I’m not going to get sick, dad,” Y/N poked Namjoon in the bicep, peeved, the wolf hybrid choking on the sip of water he had taken, his fist pounding on his chest to clear the liquid from his lungs. Not expecting that reaction, Y/N felt laughter bubbling up in her throat, poking him again before setting her sights on Yoongi.
“What’s with that look?” Yoongi asked suspiciously, Y/N biting her lip, clumsily pouncing on him, sitting on one of his thighs and giving him a sloppy smooch on his cheek. “Oh boy. No more Casamigos for you, ever.”
“Angel, my feet hurt,” Y/N’s vision was fuzzy, supported by Yoongi’s arm around her back, the leopard hybrid letting her bury her face in his shirt, breathing in his familiar sweet scent, his tail caressing her bare calves.
Without asking, Yoongi exhaled, gripping one of her ankles gingerly and unfastening the straps around them. Easing each shoe off her foot as carefully as he could, Yoongi placed them in between him and Taehyung, who paused his texting to assess the spectacle. The Kodiak hybrid’s eyes lingered on the way Yoongi was prodding lightly around her swelling ankles to release pressure, but when he caught Y/N staring back at him, he returned to his phone with his tongue in his cheek.
Petulance took over, so instead of letting Taehyung’s iciness bother her, she focused on Yoongi’s touch, sighing blissfully, his talented hands kneading into her sore muscles, purring softly behind her. She was half asleep when something dawned on her, shooting straight up from Yoongi’s lap with an exclamation, looking around frantically for her clutch.
“Looking for this?” Namjoon held it up, his eyebrows raised, sucking in his cheeks.
Making grabby hands for it, Y/N thanked him quietly for keeping an eye on all of her things, before she clumsily maneuvered to the back of the limo where Hoseok was. Jeongguk was still drowsily trying to stay awake, his head bobbing, but Jimin had passed out finally. Hoseok and Seokjin switched to water, luckily, so when she took a seat beside her fox hybrid, he was a touch more sober than he was 15 minutes prior.
“How are you doing, darling?” Hoseok’s face was rounded out in sleep, content all over it.
“I forgot to give you this,” Y/N began digging around in her clutch, Hoseok sitting up a bit straighter and making a strange, fox-like noise in the back of his throat. “Seokjinnie got you something, remember, Jin?”
Seokjin had also apparently forgotten, blinking harshly. Finding the item at the bottom of the clutch, a tiny rectangular box, she opened it, handing Hoseok a silver bracelet, the chain link the exact same as the one Seokjin had on his ring. Seokjin had the adorable idea of getting them something that matched in some way, and Y/N had no problems letting the jaguar hybrid pick it out.
Hoseok was at a loss, holding the bracelet with his mouth open, Y/N stifling a laugh at his reaction. Seokjin shifted in his seat across from them, amused but also vulnerable.
“Jinnie, is this like a friendship bracelet?” Hoseok deadpanned, radiant joy coming off of him.
“Uh-huh. Happy birthday,” Seokjin broke out in a grin, Y/N’s heart warm with how sweet their close friendship was, Hoseok demanding the jaguar hybrid to clasp it around his wrist. “You two mean a lot to me.”
“Aw, Jinnie, you’re like my big brother,” Hoseok cooed, Seokjin rolling his eyes, but Y/N knew how profound those words were to Hoseok. The fox hybrid spent years in many places, never able to put down roots, much less make close friendships. “And you’re my little darling.”
Hoseok grabbed both of them, smushing themselves together for a group hug, Y/N finally releasing a hearty laugh that startled Jimin awake beside her, knowing that the tears slipping down her cheeks were tears of happiness.
After a brutal Sunday of recovering from the tequila binge, Y/N spending most of the day laying on the couch and watching reality TV with greasy pizza, she was well again on Monday, the day of the investigation. She had to drag Jeongguk to work with her that day, Namjoon of course itching to go without complaint. It was nice to have the two of them with her while she stocked inventory, Namjoon able to reach higher shelves and Jeongguk sorting through the Christian medallions in a way that made sense. While those two were more quiet than, say, Hoseok, there was still amiable conversation here and there. Y/N had a feeling Jeongguk, in particular, was gearing up for later that evening, gazing out the shop window every once in a while to stare at the van.
“Our plan is solid. I’ll handle the cameras, Namjoon is on the audio recording devices, and Y/N, I’m going to give you the EMF detector and communication devices, since you’re adept with sensing energies,” Jeongguk assured her and Namjoon, the sun beginning to go down as the three of them brought equipment into the Sanders’ home.
The family had left for the hotel that morning, and would be staying there until Y/N and the two hybrids could successfully banish the entity. The house was cold, and eerily quiet, and Y/N was grateful that she had black tourmaline necklaces for the three of them as an added layer of protection. While she was somewhat anxious about the investigation, there was immense comfort in having Namjoon and Jeongguk with her. Namjoon was protective, which became clearer to her by the day, and Jeongguk was nearly fearless.
“How long do you think the investigation will last?” Y/N questioned, wondering if it would be anything like what she had seen on television.
“However long it takes for us to get enough evidence,” Jeongguk shrugged, on his knees and setting up a tripod facing the hallway, where Erika mentioned seeing a shadow figure several times.
“Good thing we brought the Red Bull,” Y/N joked, placing a few clear quartz crystals around the living room, Namjoon on the couch with her laptop booting up the software they’d need for audio recording and reviewing footage. “You’re gonna teach me how to use these devices, right, sweets?”
“Obviously,” Jeongguk snorted, attaching one of the cameras to the tripod. “It’s straightforward though, not many buttons to press. Then you can ask your questions you wrote down. Namjoon will be right beside you, recording audio.”
Jeongguk, dressed in all black, pushed up the sleeves of his sweater, revealing those tattoos that Y/N never fully got a good look at. While he was prickly about explaining everything to Y/N, he did it thoroughly, and it was interesting to watch the elk hybrid drop into total concentration on a particular task. Y/N decided to take a walk through the small house, not sensing much on the first floor other than that odd feeling of being watched through the living room window. It was when she climbed the stairs to the three bedrooms where there was a chill rolling down her spine.
The master bedroom, where Erika slept– and her son, too, when he had his nightmares, had a sadness, a tense anxious feel to it. Putting selenite on all of the window sills, she stopped when she saw a photo sitting on Erika’s nightstand. It was the young mother, looking vibrant and happy in comparison to how nervous she was when Y/N met her. The young boy, too, was grinning without purplish circles under his eyes. Most noticeably different was the daughter, Julie, who was a few years younger and not wearing the gothic garb she had during their initial consultation. Sighing, she hoped that the family could be at ease again once her and the boys helped them.
Moving down the hall, hands coming up to rub her shivering arms, she peeked into the boy’s bedroom, nearly choking at the heaviness of the energy in there. Y/N refused to go in there without one of her hybrids with her. Nauseous, she tentatively made her way to the final bedroom, Julie’s.
The room was painted pink, but most of the walls were covered in pop punk posters. As for the energy, it was different from the solid wall of darkness in Tommy’s room, but it still made her feel sick and again, like someone was watching her. Visually sweeping the room as Jeongguk suggested, looking for any occultish items such as a Ouija board, but not actively going through the teenager’s stuff.
She didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, but she stiffened when an ice-cold draft filled the room, penetrating her body in a way that had her skin crawling. Dread filled her, resentment, and anger. Panicking, turning every which way to see if she could spot something physically manifesting, the thump-thump-thump against the walls returning. Whimpering, she sped out of the room, chest heaving, thundering down the stairs and startling Jeongguk, who was placing special lights around in the hallway.
Y/N smacked directly into his chest, quaking, clinging to his sweater for dear life and desperate to get rid of that supernatural coldness that pierced through her. Jeongguk grunted, letting her hide from the world in his sweater, his heart hammering steadily beneath her.
“What the fuck happened, are you okay?” Jeongguk’s hands were hesitant when he patted her on the back, but there was a clear alarm in his voice.
Namjoon’s clumsy, heavy tread was immediately thudding down the hall with urgency, Y/N releasing Jeongguk with embarrassment. Her reaction to that phenomena wasn’t exactly a great start to their investigation, establishing zero dominance over the entity, but she still couldn’t stop shaking. While Jeongguk was alarmed, Namjoon was calm, hands on her shoulders so he could duck his head and make eye-contact.
“Take a few deep breaths, Y/N,” Namjoon’s eyebrows were pinched, squeezing her shoulders comfortingly. “That’s it.”
After a couple of lungfuls of air, she was able to stop shaking underneath Namjoon’s palms, the wolf hybrid letting her go as soon as she calmed down. Both of them were waiting expectantly for her to relay what had happened, and Y/N felt like the presence was at the top of the stairs and watching them.
“I think we should focus on the second floor,” Y/N said weakly, Namjoon’s orange honey eyes shifting from her face to the stairs, his blank expression giving nothing away. If anything, it was nice to have the both of them there, confident and collected. “Especially in the children’s bedrooms. I didn’t go into the boy’s bedroom, the energy was too thick and without one of you–” I was too scared. “Something manifested in the teenager’s room, like an ice-cold draft that ran right through me. Then the knocking on the walls started up again.”
Jeongguk leaned a hip against the banister, making intense eye-contact with Y/N, like he was attempting to soak in every word with grave seriousness. Sucking his lip ring into his mouth, making an animalistic grunt, and with a nod, he agreed.
“So our key spots. The kid’s bedrooms, the window in the living room, and this hallway,” Jeongguk confirmed. “I’ll go upstairs and set up more equipment. Now that you have more of an idea of what the energy feels like up there, you should write down some more questions to ask later. You’ll be alright, center yourself.”
“Okay,” Y/N agreed, hoping she wasn’t being the weakest link. “You’re going to go up by yourself?”
“Don’t worry about me,” Jeongguk had said that before, but him saying that did absolutely nothing to prevent her from worrying anyway. “Let’s just finish setting up, and we’ll start recording when it’s dark out.”
She followed Namjoon like a lost duckling back into the living room, Y/N sitting beside him on the couch while he continued to boot up his software. Taking a moment, she centered herself, eyes shut, focusing on breathing and her connection to the Earth.
“Remember why we’re here,” Namjoon said softly when she opened her eyes again, most of her fear and anxiety dissolving after centering.
“For the family,” Y/N finished for him, Namjoon giving her knee a soft squeeze, his bitten ear flickering.
“Do the lights really have to be off? Y/N doesn’t have night vision,” Namjoon asked a quarter after midnight, all of his audio equipment prepped and ready, including his tapes on the coffee table– their “base”.
“I mean, if you want to be able to see anything on these full-spectrum cameras,” Jeongguk replied, promptly switching off the last lamp that offered Y/N vision in the house. “You’re not afraid of the dark, are you kiddo?”
“If you have time to be an ass, you have time to get to work,” Y/N hissed, brushing by him with the device she had just learned how to use in her hand. That particular device, a “Spirit Box”, would fill the room with white noise, and somehow capture voices they couldn’t hear if the spirits responded to Y/N’s questions.
While she did that in front of a camera set up in front of the living room window, Jeongguk was using his handheld camcorder, taking temperatures around all of the spots in the house. Thankfully, Namjoon would stay with her, helping her make out any sounds or words they could potentially capture. Clearing her throat, she sat on the chair beneath the window, Namjoon just a few feet away on the couch, the low light of the laptop illuminating his face and making his eyes glow.
“I’m gonna take the temperatures upstairs,” Jeongguk’s voice was far away, probably already halfway to his destination, Y/N exhaling slowly as Namjoon gave her a thumbs-up; he had begun recording. She had already memorized her list of basic questions, so she switched the Spirit Box on, cringing at the gnashing sound echoing around the house.
“Is there anyone here that wishes to speak with us?” Y/N began, feeling a little foolish, but pushing down the feeling swiftly. All she heard in response was the white noise, unfortunately.
“What is your name?”
Nothing.
“How old are you?”
Nothing, again.
“Why are you here?”
Then, there was a disruption in the static, something garbly coming through, Y/N’s eyes lighting up as Namjoon began typing on the laptop.
“How many spirits are on this property? Are you alone?”
Growing a little excited, now understanding why Jeongguk was so into these devices, the static was interrupted once more, a frightening but unintelligible response captured through the Spirit Box.
“Who lives here?”
Before Y/N could get too riled up, the rest of her questions received no response, so she and Namjoon elected to move into the hall, trading places with Jeongguk, who was taking pictures of the window and using thermal imaging on the area.
It continued like that for about two more hours, repeating the interview with Namjoon multiple times with the Spirit Box and the EMF detector, the wolf hybrid letting her hold his hand when they were in Tommy’s room. The sounds of the voice that did come through in that space were particularly bone-chilling and grating. The last room, Julie’s room, only yielded one response that was reedy and low, Y/N ready to get the fuck out of dodge as soon as the interview concluded.
Reconvening downstairs, Jeongguk was starting to pack up equipment, and thankfully, he turned on a light or two. He looked charged, like new life was breathed into him. Investigations such as that one must have been his life’s passion, because Y/N hadn’t seen him like that, well, ever. Her and Namjoon were silent as they helped the elk hybrid gather everything up, and while Namjoon seemed calm, she could tell he was on edge due to some of the audio they captured together.
“Get anything?” Jeongguk pushed the last box of cameras into Namjoon’s van, Y/N wilting with exhaustion and nerves, watching her wolf hybrid lock the front door of the Sanders’ house with stiff shoulders, tape recorder under his arm. “We’ll review everything, but I’m pretty sure I captured some anomalies.”
“We had a few responses. Namjoon said he’d put the audio in a program music producers use to try and clarify what we were able to catch. There is definitely more than one entity we’re working with here,” Y/N ran a hand through her hair tiredly.
“Hmm, you’re right,” Jeongguk let her get into the van first, Y/N buckling herself into the passenger seat, thanking the sky she had the next day off. It was nearly five in the morning, and her eyes were crossing. “You did well, Y/N.”
“You too, sweets. You were in your element, huh?”
“I guess,” Jeongguk sobered up, toning down his excitement, Namjoon getting into the driver’s seat heavily, passing a hand over his face.
“Let’s get out of here, I’m drained,” Namjoon pulled out of the driveway, Y/N’s teeth unclenching when he switched on some folksy music and they got away from the house.
“You two are going to need to take some baths when we get back, right away. With that salt I gave you, I don’t want the risk of anything clinging to us,” Y/N leaned her head back, hearing Jeongguk still tinkering away with an electronic in the back of the van.
Namjoon hummed, too tired to respond, but she knew he’d listen to her. Once she explained the importance of making sure they were all properly spiritually cleansed, he hadn’t had a single complaint obeying her requests to take salt baths or enduring Y/N waving rosemary smoke around him. Jeongguk, on the other hand, was a toss up.
All Y/N knew was that she wasn’t exactly eager to find out what the entities were saying to her. Judging by the nastiness of some of the voices they captured, she doubted it was anything friendly. Namjoon said he’d take care of the audio over the course of the week, and Jeongguk was going to comb through his videos, data, and photos as well. All Y/N had to do was sit with the energies she felt and perhaps come up with some kind of plan for cleansings and banishment. Trying to find the moon in the sky, Y/N counted street lights until they were back at their own home, and there was a collective breath of relief from the three of them when they were safe inside.
Before she knew it, it was the end of the week, the day she and Seokjin planned their date. Y/N had come up with something special to do with him during the evening, and she knew they weren’t going to be bothered, she made sure of it. With Namjoon and Jeongguk holed up in the van poring over their evidence still; Taehyung, Yoongi, and Hoseok at the rec center for their clubs, and Jimin outside putting the garden beds together on the finally-thawing ground, they were pretty much by themselves. She was in Seokjin’s bedroom, the lamps dimmed low, and her jaguar hybrid was somewhere in the kitchen, claiming he was making something for them to snack on. Y/N didn’t tell Seokjin what her plan was for them, wanting a nice surprise, so as quickly as she could, she dumped the materials she needed on his neatly made bed.
There was an old white topsheet she found in the depths of one of the linen closets, Y/N shaking it out and tying it to tops of the front two bedposts. The fabric fell, making a large “screen” at the foot of the bed, and with that done in a pinch, she hooked up the mini projector she got on Amazon and stuck it on the shelf behind Seokjin’s headboard.
A cozy, quiet movie night was something she thought Seokjin would enjoy. Meaning to watch Lord of the Rings with him, she had the boxed CD set ready to go, even if they’d probably only get through one of the movies due to the length. Satisfied, she sped into his bathroom, changing into her pajamas– a pair of cotton shorts and a matching tank top. It was likely she’d end up sleeping next to Seokjin that night, so she decided she might as well get comfortable. She was tossing her clothes in his hamper when the sounds of the jaguar hybrid shuffling into his bedroom filled her ears, Y/N smiling at her reflection in his mirror and going out to meet him.
Seokjin, with a curious flicker to his ear, was staring at the sheet she hung, setting a tray down with various snacks and drinks, and of course, a few slabs of the bread he baked that morning. Skipping to his side, Seokjin whirled around, cheeks coloring with how little clothing she was wearing. Seokjin wasn’t a fan of the cold, so his room was always boiling with space heaters going, so she wasn’t about to wear flannel pajamas.
“Pretty, why’d you tie that sheet there?” Seokjin cleared his throat, adjusting his thin tee-shirt by the collar, averting his eyes.
“So we could watch a movie together, I got a projector online. Do you like the sound of that?” Y/N asked, a touch self consciously, sitting on his bed and looking at the tray he brought up. With a pounding heart, she realized most of the snacks he prepared were her favorites.
“Yeah, it’s perfect,” Seokjin insisted, knees landing on the bed softly, fluffing his pillows and moving the stuffed alpaca aside so he could sit against the headboard. “What do you wanna watch?”
“Well, all those months ago, I mentioned wanting to watch Lord of the Rings with you. How about that?”
Seokjin, his bright eyes widening, replayed the memory in his head– when he was recovering from his fever, the day Y/N adopted him, she had lent him that book. He was nodding at once, watching Y/N grin and get on all fours, sliding a disc into the projector, adjusting the volume. He didn’t know if she felt how charged the air felt, tucking her hair behind her ear as she navigated the movie’s menu, his eyes skimming over her figure indulgently. The beginning credits began to roll, the projector displaying the title card of the film pretty well, Seokjin realizing that was why Y/N had dimmed the lights so low.
Y/N got comfortable beside Seokjin at once, curling into his side and tucking herself under his arm, one of hers thrown across his waist. Reminded of a kitten getting cozy in her bed, Seokjin purred, fingertips dancing along her upper arm, the skin like warm silk.
“I… never asked you this, but when I gave you this book, you seemed emotional. Can I ask you why, honey?” Y/N was thoroughly enjoying Seokjin stroking her arm with reverence, his chin resting on top of her head.
“Oh, I suppose that was kind of odd to you at the time,” Seokjin replied, focusing more on her than the movie in the background. Movies never really compared to books, anyways. “It’s just something that I remember… a young kid I grew up with telling me about. You know I’m not a big adventurer, but reading about it, seeing it, I’m comfortable with. Nostalgia sometimes gets to me, that’s all.”
“That’s why you’re so sweet,” Y/N hummed, her breath fanning over his neck, Seokjin giggling at her words. “I felt so bad that day, I didn’t wanna make you cry.”
“You didn’t, you just reminded me that sometimes the world is smaller than I think it is,” Seokjin’s touch migrated to her shoulders, lowly hissing at the tightness in the muscles, Y/N wincing when he pressed over them. “Come here.”
Seokjin cupped her waist, spreading his legs carefully, before rolling her over so she was seated between his thighs, back pressed to his chest. Y/N went stiff, the opposite of what he was trying to do, so he gave her a reassuring, chaste kiss to the crown of her head, pressing his thumbs into the tender sides of her neck. Shuddering when Seokjin dug the digits into two knots that have been giving her grief the entire week, she went limp immediately, not knowing where to put her own hands– settling them idly on her lap.
“You’re tense, let me help you,” Seokjin murmured, Y/N surrounded by his eucalyptus scent, and having him care for her was better than any spa treatment. “You’ve been working too hard, pretty.”
“Uh-uh,” Y/N protested, melting backwards, the sturdiness of his chest actually quite surprising. “Not true– oh.”
Seokjin hit a particularly tender spot, her tight trapezius muscle, and he was seemingly chuckling as he massaged the flesh sensually. He didn’t make a smart retort, even though he could have, but instead he focused on working out every single kink in her neck.
“How did you get so good at this?” Y/N was choking back moans, at that point, barely paying attention to the movie, her temperature rising in the toasty bedroom.
“Well, when I was a performer, I’d have to tend to my own knots and strains,” Seokjin responded, sweeping her hair aside so he could press on either side of her upper spine, Y/N involuntarily arching away from him with a strained whine– one that had heat rising to his cheeks, shamefully. “Guess the skill is finally coming in handy.”
“Seokjin,” Y/N breathed, and the jaguar hybrid thought he heard a slight edge of warning to it, like she was accusing him of being cheeky. After so long, he couldn’t help it.
A few moments went by mostly in silence– apart from the movie’s dialogue and score, and a tiny yelp from Y/N once or twice. Seokjin, even though he couldn’t stand feeling cold, was truthfully getting warm himself, Y/N so pliant in front of him, her hands subconsciously finding purchase on his knees as he worked her back.
“B-baby, I think I’m g-good, uh–” Y/N’s breathing became labored, heat striking through her as he continued the massage under her shoulder blades. “Oh fuck.”
Apparently a very sore spot, Seokjin dug his fingers into her skin with more intensity, and embarrassingly so, Y/N let out a thin, pleading whine, Seokjin’s spine going rigid at the sound.
“Does it feel good?” Seokjin asked, his voice becoming siren-like again, moving to the other shoulder blade and eliciting a similar sound from her.
“W-what do you think?” Y/N was out of oxygen, two seconds away from pinning him to the headboard, Seokjin’s laughter rumbly and deep. “I don’t know if I want you to stop or to–”
Y/N was shamefully turned on at that point. It was hard not to be, she thought, between his proximity and his hands working her into a boneless puddle. Still chuckling, Seokjin removed one of his hands, reaching for the tray on the bed, plucking a strawberry from the bowl and offering it to Y/N, fingers poised before her lips.
Instead of eating it, Y/N looked over her shoulder, face flushed and pupils blown out, an accusatory expression lighting up her features.
“You didn’t mention you’re some sort of Casanova,” Y/N mumbled, overwhelmed by that romantic side of her jaguar hybrid, his ears fluttering playfully. Instead of feeding her, Seokjin ate the strawberry himself, the cool juices of the fruit spilling over his chin and down his neck, Y/N’s sight zeroing in on that visual. “Jesus Christ.”
“What’s wrong?” Seokjin teased once he swallowed the fruit, forcibly turning her back around so he could continue the massage, Y/N freezing when he not only laid his palms on her shoulders again, but his lips pressed a kiss to the top of her spine tenderly, his lips soothing her feverish flesh from the cold fruit he ate.
“Are you aware of how gorgeous you are, Seokjin? It’s borderline disturbingly wrong,” Y/N grouched, squeezing his knees, Seokjin freezing behind her before cracking up into hysterics, arms winding around her middle tightly, sponging kisses along her shoulders in between laughter. “You’re literally a doll!”
Despite his laughter, Y/N could feel his heart speeding up with her words, chest still flush with her back, and she debated whether or not to shut the movie off and just straddle him at that point. Suddenly aware that her panties were starting to get a bit damp, Y/N cursed herself inwardly, not believing how little it took to turn her on. She wondered if the jaguar hybrid could smell it, his sleek black tail laying heavily on one of her bare thighs. Boldly, while Seokjin kneaded her flesh again, she traced her fingers over the silky fur of his tail out of curiosity, Seokjin whimpering behind her, movements freezing.
The atmosphere shifted instantly. She hadn’t gone as far as to touch Yoongi’s tail yet, but with Seokjin’s right in front of her, it was hard to resist stroking through the fur. In consequence, Seokjin’s fingers danced over the straps of her tank top, running his index fingers along the lace.
“Can I… move these just a bit?” Seokjin fiddled with the material, Y/N nodding straight away, hurrying up the process by sliding one of the straps around her bicep, eager for him to tend to her aching shoulders, craving his touch. With a soft intake of air, Seokjin copied her movements on the other side, one hand gliding over the entirety of her exposed upper back, seemingly feeling for more points of tension.
Still stroking through the fur of his tail, her other hand gripping his quilt with pale knuckles, Y/N bit down on her lip when Seokjin rolled his knuckles against her tender skin. Betting every last dollar in her bank account that neither of them gave a single shit what was happening in the movie still playing in front of them, Seokjin used one hand to grab the tray of food on the bed and move it to one of his nightstands distractedly, bending his knees so his feet were flat against the quilt and he could better cage Y/N in.
However, with Seokjin’s movements, Y/N scooching up on the bed to press closer to him, her tank top straps fell to the crooks of her elbows, her eyes shooting wide open as the garment bunched around her waist– and she was not wearing a bra in that moment.
There was a pause, Seokjin’s broad body crooking over hers from behind, where nothing was audible but sounds from the movie. Seokjin was staring at the entirety of her bare back, also realizing she wasn’t wearing anything under her tank top, but he was unable to help himself by gliding his hands from the small of her waist up to her mid-back. The action was smooth, Y/N’s skin somewhat slick with perspiration, Seokjin’s mouth watering. He always considered himself a man of patience, but there was something primal brewing within him, something that was difficult to control.
“Y/N,” Seokjin’s voice was but a breeze in the wind, experimentally digging his fingertips into the base of her spine, relishing in the thready moan she offered to him, one of her forearms pressed over her breasts to preserve her modesty– Seokjin could smell both her arousal and bashfulness filling up the room thickly. “Are you alright?’”
“Keep touching me,” was all Y/N responded with, leaning backwards and removing her arm from her chest, Seokjin focusing straight ahead at the movie blindly.
“How so, pretty girl?” Seokjin groaned, wrecked, his nose tucked into the base of her throat, not moving until she vocalized.
“All over, anywhere,” Y/N whimpered, gasping when Seokjin’s hands snaked around her middle, skimming over her tummy, the jaguar hybrid’s resolve finally dissolving, his lips latching around the junction of her neck and shoulder. “Honey…”
Sucking her flesh into his mouth sensually, Seokjin felt blood rushing to his crotch, the taste of her skin so addicting, he swore he was high. It was the taste of her, yes, that was causing him to descend into a lust-driven frenzy, but also the scent of her love, the scent of her arousal, that was egging him on. Still, the human side of his brain begged him to see through the fog.
“You’re sure?”
“Fuck, yes, Jin, please,” Y/N had annoyance dripping in her tone, one of her palms covering his on her abdomen, guiding it up to her sternum. “Love you, and I want you.”
A switch flipped within Seokjin, one he didn’t know existed, and he stroked the naked sides of her waist with hunger, resuming his task of decorating the slope of her neck with love bites, a strangled noise leaving his throat when Y/N shifted her hips backwards; flush to his.
He was reminded of the previous weekend, Y/N in that dress, grinding into him with carefree abandon– and how he needed to excuse himself to the bathroom before they left to stick his face under the icy tap. He felt perverted, out of control– but a distant, animalistic side of him was saying “she’s the one, the only one” which was enough for him to want to stake his claim.
Seokjin grasped the material of her tank top pooling around her waist, pulling it over her head with care. Once Y/N was free, she keened at the feeling of Seokjin suckling a bruise beneath her earlobe, his hardness pressing up against her ass, the sensation drenching her underwear thoroughly and anticipation climbing to Everest.
Silently, Seokjin nipped the shell of her ear with his sharpened teeth, and before Y/N could fully process that, he was cradling her chest, the weight of her tits in his palms having him groaning and pressing his hips against her ass even more firmly. He had never been so turned on in his life, Y/N totally caged in his embrace, wanting and receptive to everything he had to offer her. This, this, was everything he was waiting to feel his entire life, and he could hardly think straight– Y/N semi-consciously whacking the projector, muting the movie miraculously in favor of hearing the noises Seokjin could make.
Seokjin, caught in a spell, hooked his chin over Y/N’s shoulder, not caring that his back was aching from the prolonged arch, her breasts still cupped in his hands. Experimentally, he pressed them together, finally peering at her exposed chest, his throat rather dry at the sight as he soaked in both her heaving into his grasp, and the marks he had left on the side of her throat and shoulder. Skin lighting up with heat, one of her hands flailed backwards, clawing at Seokjin’s hip– now aware that he was very much completely clothed, all Y/N wanted was his bare skin against hers.
“Easy, kitten,” Seokjin ground out, her fingernails cutting into his flesh even through the material of his sweatpants, Y/N hardly recognizing his hypnotic voice as it reached her ears centimeters away, and what he called her having her lax in his grip like prey.
Her tits still in his palms, lips heavy on her neck, Y/N was about to melt into his mattress completely– breath stolen from her lungs when the jaguar hybrid teasingly swiped his thumbs over her nipples, erect with all of the slow teasing, the sensation sharp and having her jolt in the cage– made out of his limbs– he had trapped her in.
“Tease,” Y/N managed due to the way his forefinger and thumb tweaked the buds, Y/N nearly passing out as he promptly slicked up the fingers of his right hand by sticking them in his mouth. “Jin–”
“Shush,” Seokjin returned, using his dampened digits to roll her right nipple between them, completely entranced. At that point, he felt himself leaking somewhat into his boxers, toying with Y/N’s chest until she was a mess in his lap, peering over her shoulder to see how her body reacted to his touch. “If you let me, I’ll make you feel good. But I want you to listen to me, is that okay?”
Y/N nodded desperately, but it wasn’t enough of a confirmation for Seokjin.
“Mmm-hmm! Yes, Seokjin, I-I– hnngh,” Y/N yelped when he kneaded the sensitive flesh of her breasts again.
“Okay then, lean on me,” Seokjin sucked yet another bruise into the side of Y/N’s throat, enjoying working her up. “You– mmph–”
Y/N had turned her head, seeking out his mouth, eagerly slotting her lips against his with desperation. His arms automatically wrapped around her again, one forearm slung low on her writhing hips, the other barred across her chest, letting her kiss him with abandon. She had wanted to kiss him like that for weeks, swiping her tongue along the seam of his mouth, Seokjin’s lips parting slightly and granting her access. A deep, indulgent moan came from her as she tasted him, sweet like the strawberry he just ate, still clawing at his clothed hips when her tongue slid against his. In return, Seokjin hummed, kissing her back just as freely, letting her take control for a moment. Though, while she was distracted, Seokjin began to fiddle with the waistband of her pajama shorts, a grunt tearing through him when she jerked her hips backwards.
Breaking away from their kiss, Seokjin was transfixed, Y/N attempting to keep her control by going for his neck, even though the twisted position of her body was uncomfortable. Lapping at the sticky trail of strawberry juice along his Adam's apple, Seokjin shuddered at the feeling, her teeth scraping against his throat before she sunk them in, which had his eyes rolling back into his skull.
Taking matters into her own hands, Y/N managed to wiggle out of her shorts, a hand breaking away from Seokjin’s hips, tossing them carelessly off the bed. The jaguar hybrid, sounding utterly fucked out already, tipped his head back and moaned when her ass collided with his lap again. At that point, with the scent of her wetness becoming so concentrated, Seokjin snapped, growling, dangerously, Y/N blinking up at him at once.
“Face forward and watch the movie, pretty,” Seokjin ordered, Y/N’s head spinning. If he didn’t want to continue, that was fine, but she was pretty much naked and she wasn’t about to watch Hobbits traipse through the mud like that. However, that wasn’t the case, Seokjin hooking his chin over her kiss-bitten shoulder, fingertips dipping into the waistband of her panties. “Oh. Did you wear these for me?”
Looking down, confused and still driven crazy by lust, Y/N’s mouth dropped open. Subconsciously, she must have picked out the pink pair of panties Seokjin was teasing her with when they were folding laundry, the gusset of the fabric completely soaked. Lolling her head back against his chest, she looked at him pleadingly, the feeling of him tracing her hip bones driving her insane.
“Aw, poor thing,” Seokjin cooed, kissing her temple with a derisive smirk. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”
With that, Seokjin stripped her of her panties in a flash, stuffing the garment into the pocket of his sweatpants, Y/N mewling, turned on by the fact that she was completely bare before him, and he hadn’t shed a single article of clothing. Without wasting too much time, his mouth on her neck again, Seokjin grabbed a hold onto her thighs and propped them up, his breath quickening at the fresh wave of her arousal that surrounded him. Again, Y/N grappled for his tail, just about the only thing she could do wrapped up in his arms like that, cunt clenching around nothing when he moaned hollowly, the appendage curling around her wrist.
Finally, Seokjin ghosted his fingers over where she needed him most, cursing at the wetness that gathered there abundantly, Y/N’s hips bucking over his lap with a cry. Cunt pulsing with his touch, Seokjin bit his lip, parting her dewy folds, the slick sound making Y/N cringe. He didn’t want to tease her too much, she was practically dripping onto his quilt, free hand coming up to pinch a nipple as his index finger made a slow circle around her clit simultaneously.
The action elicited a great reward. Y/N’s spine arched, crying out his name, more wetness gushing out of her. Cooing again, Seokjin kept circling the sweet spot, loving the sounds she made for him, hardly noticing she was scraping her nails against his sensitive tail.
“So wet, kitten,” Seokjin purred, slowly working her up, Y/N’s gut tightening at his dulcet tone, hardly here nor there.
“Feels so good,” Y/N thrashed, stomach flipping over when the movement had his cock pressed right against the seam of her ass. “Ah!”
Seokjin groaned, ignoring his own pleasure in favor of finding her’s, testing the waters by teasing a fingertip around her fluttering entrance. Hearing her pleas, he sunk the digit into her, whimpering at the way she clamped down on him. Y/N rocked her hips, essentially riding his finger, the visual erotic and making him hiss darkly.
“That’s it, pretty girl,” Seokjin encouraged, gripping the side of her waist to aid her desperate movements. “Use me.”
Helping her out, he began to snap his wrist against her, curling his finger and pressing against the front of her walls, Y/N swore she could have died, so crammed full of desire for the jaguar hybrid it was driving her insane.
“M-more, please,” Y/N begged, grinding against his hand, leaking all over him.
“Spoiled little girl,” Seokjin taunted, but despite the jab, he added another digit into the mix while she rode his fingers, his thumb toying with her clit as she felt herself barreling towards her orgasm. “Gonna need to stretch you out, anyways, kitten.”
Gasping, his dirty words was all she needed, her sudden orgasm taking Seokjin by surprise as she wailed in his arms, walls spasming around his fingers as he continued to fuck them into her. The lewd sounds of her wetness had his ears ringing, wanting to taste the mess she made, but he murmured sweet nothings in her ear as she tore through her orgasm instead.
Y/N, panting, grasped his wrist to halt his movements, oversensitive but somehow still needy for him, Seokjin releasing his hold on her and allowing her to turn, climbing over his lap to straddle him with a ravenous look on her face. Seokjin simply stared back, smirking, bringing his slicked-up fingers to his mouth, dutifully cleaning them off and trying not to cum in his pants at the taste of her. To his surprise, a startled moan leaving his lips, Y/N rocked her hips over the hardness beneath his sweatpants, her hands tangled in his shirt.
“Uh, oh, still need more?” Seokjin teased, hands landing on her ass and kneading the flesh, helping her grind against him. “You really are spoiled, aren’t you?”
Y/N had no response but to kiss him, whimpering when his tongue tangled with hers, Y/N sensing that he was slowly beginning to unravel. She wanted nothing more than for him to lose his patience and fuck her senseless, feeling her pussy throbbing over the bulge in his pants. She broke away to mouth down his neck, and when she felt him shiver when she grazed over a particular spot, she sucked a bruise into the flesh, Seokjin’s hips grinding up harshly into her heat.
“Take this off,” Y/N whined, yanking at his flimsy tee shirt, fed up with being the only one naked. Seokjin obliged, letting her strip the article off of him while they continued to rub against one another, sweat dripping from his hairline. “God, you’re so fucking sexy…”
Y/N gaped at the sight in front of her, not expecting Seokjin to be… well, ripped. She had seen his chest before, when she mended the wound on his side, but she was hardly gawking at his solid abs when she was doing so. Hands instantly shooting out to glide along his skin, his muscles rippling under her touch, the jaguar hybrid was panting while she gyrated her hips on his cock.
“No, you,” Seokjin managed, smiling at her despite the situation they were in, Y/N kissing over his prominent clavicles tenderly. “Fuck, pretty girl!”
Y/N moved off of his hips, gawking at the wet patch she left over his gray sweatpants with distant humiliation, making brief eye-contact to ask if she could divest the garment from him. He nodded eagerly, so wound up he could think of nothing else but the scent of her, the love in her eyes, and how perfect she was. In one smooth motion, she shucked both his pants and boxers from his body, her eyes going comically wide at what she saw.
Not only was Seokjin the sweetest man alive, gorgeous, and ripped– he had the biggest dick she ever saw in her life. Truly, he was blessed in all areas, Y/N speechless as she stared at the intimidating length and girth, suddenly understanding why he mentioned needing to stretch him out.
“Seokjin, you’re huge,” Y/N, again, was clenching around nothing, looking up at him with awe. Seokjin had blush in his cheeks that wasn’t due to his arousal and the temperature of the room, Y/N realizing he was bashful. “I– you want my mouth, my–”
“Come here,” Seokjin cut her off, regaining his ability to take control, hooking her around her waist. “I want you to sit on my cock.”
Stunned, Y/N felt her wetness roll down her thighs, and fuck, she was going to need it. She had no objection to that request, maintaining their eye contact as she reached down, grasping his cock, the jaguar hybrid’s ears flattening against his skull as her thumb smeared precum around his tip. Having mercy on him, and neediness taking over her again, she ran him through her folds, dripping over him, whimpering brokenly when he caught on her entrance. Would he even fit?
“You can take it,” Seokjin read her mind, tucking hair behind her ear and kissing beneath her jaw, the words making heat strike through her. “Go slow.”
Swallowing thickly, she lined him up, exhaling shakily as she sunk down, and despite how turned on she was and the sheer wetness spilling from her, the stretch was enough to knock the wind out of her. Taking over, guiding her by her waist, Seokjin grit his teeth as she took him inch by inch, her chest heaving. It was a tight fit, enough to have Seokjin seeing stars, Y/N’s thighs shaking on either side of him. He was telling her to breathe when she was fully seated in his lap, cock throbbing inside of her as she adjusted to his size, kissing over her face soothingly.
“Move when you’re ready kitten, okay?” Seokjin himself was a bit starved for oxygen, Y/N cupping his face and pressing a kiss on his lower lip, tongue flicking over the flesh.
Regaining her ability to function, eyes going round when she looked down– she pressed a hand over her lower abdomen, the slightest bump there, the action having Seokjin hissing. Darkness was in his eyes when her walls fluttered around him, and with that, Y/N gave an experimental roll of her hips, both of them moaning in tandem as he slid out an inch.
“F-fuck, Jin,” Y/N whined, getting a hold on his broad shoulders to ride him properly, lifting herself up only to drop back down harshly, feeling like he was spearing into her guts.
Entirely overwhelmed, Seokjin leaned forward, wrapping his lips around one of her nipples while she fucked herself on his cock, happy to let her chase her pleasure, to provide it. Y/N’s head was thrown back, entirely gone, Seokjin’s name leaving her lips like a prayer when he stroked a thumb over her clit, bracing her hands on his knees again to switch up the angle, one that gave Seokjin quite a show and had his cock rubbing against her G-spot deliciously.
“Look at you,” Seokjin awed, his hips beginning to buck up to meet her strokes, taking his cock like a saint. “Fuck. So pretty, so perfect.”
With Seokjin fucking into her like that, his steady circles over her clit, she was gone again with a slam and grind onto his lap, an elastic band snapping within her as she stilled, collapsed against Seokjin’s chest as she felt herself gush.
“Holy fucking hell,” Seokjin groaned, his lap soaked, Y/N’s pussy clamping down so hard on him his vision was turning white.
Y/N couldn’t move anymore, throat strained from her cries, convulsing against her. The world was turning as she caught her breath, somehow still aroused, and she found herself on her back, Seokjin sucking a deep bruise into her neck. Still nestled inside of her, throbbing, Y/N wound her arms around the jaguar hybrid, hands sliding into his hair.
“Fuck me,” Y/N breathed against his lips, and that was all Seokjin needed to release that last scrap of control he had over himself.
Snapping his hips forward, Y/N’s cunt swollen and sensitive, she wailed, feeling him in her throat. The new position was intimate, Seokjin pretty much laying most of his body weight on top of her, murmuring things in her ear that she could only make out bits and pieces of.
“Gonna cum soon,” he groaned, driving into her, Y/N sinking her teeth into his shoulder.
“Cum inside me,” she requested, the discussion about her IUD already out of the way days ago. “P-please.”
“Oh yeah? You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” Seokjin teased, though the request had the predator in him coming alive. “Want me to stuff you full so you can have my cubs?”
Shock flooded through Y/N at that question, not expecting Seokjin to be like that, and shamefully she felt herself clenching around him again. Seokjin must have felt it, because he grunted, hips stuttering.
“You’d look so beautiful,” Seokjin sighed, Y/N’s eyes rolling back, sliding her fingers over his silky ears. “Fuck, I love you, my pretty girl, my love, gonna give it to you–”
With a final thrust, Seokjin went still, kissing Y/N harshly, heat filling her as he spilled into her cunt, the jaguar hybrid whimpering. Miraculously, the sensation of him cumming so deeply inside of her had a smaller, less intense orgasm shuddering through her, leaving her utterly spent and exhausted. Seokjin himself was breathing like he ran a marathon, Y/N holding him weakly as he pulled himself together.
“You’re insane,” Y/N accused once she caught her breath, covered in sweat, saliva, and cum, her poor pussy battered and sensitive. “I won’t be able to walk for three days.”
Seokjin giggled, actually giggled, after how devilish he had just behaved, placing an apologetic kiss on her jaw.
“Was I too rough?” Seokjin became serious, worry etched in his eyebrows.
“No, you were perfect,” Y/N insisted, cupping the side of his face. “I love you, honey.”
Hiding his face in her neck, he returned the sentiment, both of them content to sit in their mess for a few minutes to hold each other, Seokjin’s tail curling behind him languidly.
“We watched about five minutes of that movie,” Y/N commented, twirling a lock of his wavy hair around a finger with a snort. “That was a hell of a first date!”
“There’s always next time,” Seokjin replied, finally rolling off of her, Y/N wincing at what they had to clean up. “I’m gonna get some things to clean you up, can you have a few sips of that water for me, pretty?”
Y/N, bonelessly, reached for the forgotten snack platter, greedily gulping the water down her scraped-up throat, watching Seokjin walk to his dresser. With a secret smile, she stared at his ass, munching on a strawberry. He only took a few minutes to gather his items: a few damp cloths, two pairs of his pajamas, and a fresh quilt to replace the one that had unspeakable fluids all over it.
Lovingly, Seokjin cleaned her up, cooing when she winced at the sensitivity between her legs, doing the same to himself and dressing the two of them in his soft pajamas. Y/N only had to stand for a few seconds while he changed the quilt, pulling it back so they could get in.
They ended up in the same position they were originally in, Y/N curled into his side, Y/N turning the projector off of mute in an attempt to pick up wherever the movie was, her eyes catching on something sitting on one of the pillows.
“Oh my god. The alpaca watched us fuck!” Y/N exclaimed, pointing at the plushie, making Seokjin’s squeaky laugh fill the room, Y/N smacking him lightly on his chest. “Why do we keep scandalizing the innocents?”
“Our cross to bear,” Seokjin shrugged, brushing his lips over one of the love bites he left behind.
Holding her close, they chatted about the movie, ate some snacks, and after about an hour, fell asleep intertwined– the projector still rolling on, and rain falling gently outside.
“I think I’ve figured out the audio,” Namjoon invited Y/N into his room days later, once she untangled herself from Seokjin in the morning and completely rinsed their sins off of her body. “Everything we captured last week.”
Namjoon’s expression was worrying her, his eyebrows pinched, sitting at his desk and chin in his hand. He had been slaving over a digital audio workstation all week, hardly making it to mealtimes, Y/N even hearing him pacing around his room late at night.
“Is it bad?”
Namjoon gave her a look, one that said everything she needed to know, leaning against his desk.
“Did Jeongguk listen?”
“He listened this morning,” Namjoon said carefully, Y/N wondering why he wasn’t present. “Due to what we ended up capturing, he went upstairs to consult his old journal. I haven’t seen him since.”
“Let’s hear it, then,” Y/N bit her lip nervously, not liking his clear reluctance. With a sigh, he pressed on the space bar.
“What is your name?”
Static.
“How old are you?”
More static.
“Why are you here?”
Listening to her recorded voice had her cringing, but finally, there was a response to the third question.
“Watching.” The voice was creepy, low, and made her queasy, but what was said had her skin crawling.
“How many spirits are on this property? Are you alone?”
“Many are here.”
Y/N glanced at Namjoon, a little confused. Sure, the responses made her uneasy, but they weren’t so bad to warrant how hesitant he looked.
“Okay, creepy, but expected, right?” She asked, nudging him with her foot.
“There’s more. I didn’t want to show you, but Jeongguk insisted,” Namjoon said flatly, expression darkening. “Actually, I don’t think you, specifically, should even go back to that house.”
“What? Namjoon, you’re freaking me out. Just show me,” Y/N blinked, Namjoon scrolling on the workstation to a highlighted section.
“This is when we were in Julie’s room,” Namjoon murmured, pressing play.
“Why are you here?” Y/N’s voice came through the speakers, Y/N recalling they only got one response in that room.
“To kill you, whorish witch.”
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The Solace Window
Pairing: Hoseok x Reader (ft. Namjoon)
Genre: Angst
↳ 15.8k / Older Couple AU
Summary: Kim Namjoon is no more, and you are left behind as a 75 year old widow. Stuck in between experiencing grief and mourning your late husband, your search for solace seems more and more far-fetched. That is until you stumble upon widowed Jung Hoseok.
*Warnings: Depictions surrounding death, grief, depression, spousal loss, miscarriage, fertility issues, illness, growing older, familial issues, mistreatment of the elderly, old age homes. This story will deal with heavy topics and reader discretion is highly advised.
A/N: After much contemplation, I have decided to write this fic. It is very personal to me, and one that I really wanted to share.
He’s gone.
Kim Namjoon is laid to rest in the casket in an eternal sleep. His gray hair has been carefully combed back against his wrinkled skin, and he’s dressed in an elegant black suit, arms folded and resting on top of his chest. He wears a content expression, brows smoothed out and lips tightly shut.
He’s gone, forever.
A handful of individuals surround him; namely a couple in their late thirties clad entirely in black. The wife clutches onto her husband’s shirt, thick tears streaming down her face and tremors shuddering through her shoulders.
“D-Dad…” She chokes out, burying herself further into her husband’s embrace as he wraps his arms around her.
There are two small children with wide eyes, glancing between their mother and father in curiosity. Their gazes then flicker over to the rest of the people who have gathered, before looking back at the older lady sitting on the side, who holds a somber expression and far too much anguish in her eyes.
You can only watch as the service is completed and you have to say your farewells. You can only watch as you keep the deep ache in your chest at bay, attempting to keep yourself from crumbling. You can only watch as your loved ones are a mess, sobs echoing from the room.
You can only watch as your husband departs from this world, leaving you behind.
You are silent the entire ride home.
When the multiple cars arrive at the large complex, you already begin to carefully shift out of the vehicle, not waiting for anyone to help you out. Your cane hits against the pavement and you place pressure on it, moving slowly with a hunched back.
You trail along the sidewalk until meeting the front steps, cautiously raise your feet and walk on them one by one. Weakly pushing against the door, you tread towards the staircase, having no desire to eat and wanting to head straight to your room.
A gentle hand on your shoulder halts you.
Turning around, the woman stares back at you with a swollen but intentful gaze. She’s inherited your eyes and Namjoon’s smile, her expression scanning your features.
“Mom…” She calls out, but you don’t have the strength to hear her words.
“I’m tired, Naree.” You quietly whisper, and she moves her mouth as if to speak again, but her own words fizzle out. She simply nods, swivelling away as her eyes brim with water.
You gradually ascend onto the steps, pushing your cane against the wood before hauling your shaking feet upward. After a couple of moments, you manage to reach the top, shuffling your feet into your bedroom.
The bedroom you once shared with Namjoon.
There’s a double-sized bed in the middle with two dressers, one of which has Namjoon’s medications carefully stacked to the side, a small lamp and a book with a bookmark that he was in the midst of completing. There’s two picture frames off to the side, a much younger you with a huge smile hugging a shyer and much younger Namjoon, the snapshot taken seconds before he had accidentally stumbled and taken you down with him.
You move closer to the other dresser, the one that contains all of your belongings. Setting your cane securely against it, you slip into the covers, bringing them up to your chest until you’re completely nestled.
As you stare at the ceiling, silence greets you. There’s the faint tick of the clock on the opposite side of the bed, the very one Namjoon had installed so it was easier for him to figure out the time without squinting and straining his eyes. It’s accompanied with a side that is now empty, his scent still lingering on the pillow that sits right next to yours.
The silence continues to greet you the longer you stare at the ceiling, and it’s absolutely deafening.
The tears rise before you can stop them, rolling down the crinkle of your eyes. The longer you wait, the longer you stare, the more it becomes inevitable with every passing minute.
He’s not coming back. There’s no him arising from the door, slowly parting it as he sheepishly admits he had accidentally fallen asleep on the couch downstairs, mind growing absent these days. There’s no dim light radiating out from your side, a pair of glasses on the rim of his nose as he carefully turns the pages of his book. There’s no familiar dimpled smile wishing you goodnight, no soft kisses against your forehead before he slips into the covers with you, pulling you into his warm and comfortable embrace.
There’s nothing anymore and it’s something that slams into you, being wide awake despite living in a walking nightmare.
A harsh sob rips from your throat, echoing against the silent walls.
You are numb.
You slowly peel open your eyes in the morning, the faint sunlight seeping through the same floral curtains. The side beside you still stays empty, as you continue to sleep on your own side. The belongings on the opposite dresser are untouched, small specks of dust long beginning to settle.
A year has passed since the tragedy, and you are still numb.
You rise onto your feet, your wrinkled hand reaching out for your cane. Weakly pushing yourself off the bed, your feet stagger as you pad through the room and head into the bathroom.
Setting your cane aside again, you turn the tap on and the water flows. Pooling it in your hands, you splash it over your skin, the water feeling tender against it. Glancing in the mirror, a low sigh leaves your lips.
The lines on your features have deepened and increased, small indents showcasing near the corners of your eyes and your mouth. Your cheeks have become hollow, bone beginning to surface and protrude out. The bottom of your eyes have darkened, skin sagging down.
There's a saying you’ve roughly heard in passing – one that Namjoon’s mother had echoed to you when his father had passed away and you were inquiring how she was.
She had said that for many couples, after your spouse passes away, the grief only seems to accelerate the aging process tenfold and that it wouldn’t be too long till her own day would come.
At the moment, the thought itself was devastating to hear. But you never thought a day would come when her words would be so utterly true, your face having aged more within one year compared to the last five years you had spent with Namjoon.
After washing up solemnly in silence, you pad back through into the desolate bedroom, before exiting and slowly descending down the stairs.
Naree’s voice echoes through the room.
“...–not eating on time and barely talks, I just don’t know what to do anymore.”
“It comes with age.” Her husband, Seojun, echoes, “You should know that she’s growing old.”
“I know,” She huffs, “But she won’t even go through my father’s belongings, instead she insists on keeping everything the same and it’s been so long–”
You quietly clear your throat, leaning against the staircase beside the kitchen. Naree spins around with wide eyes and both of them freeze, as if they had been caught.
“Mom–”
“I’m feeling tired.” You simply say.
“Let me make you some tea.” She brings up immediately and you nod, turning around with another word. Naree and her husband glance at each other silently, before she moves towards the kettle.
You walk over to sit down on the large couch at the side in the living room, the one that has enough cushions for your hunched back. Sitting down with a large heave, your gaze falls onto the window.
A small girl stumbles into the room.
Her wide eyes are bright, a familiar dimpled smile on her lips and a photo in her hands.
There’s a soft upturn to your lips and she beams, rushing over in an instant.
“Grandma!” she squeals, body falling near your legs and head landing in your lap. Another younger girl pads in quietly behind, following her older sister with curious eyes.
“Nayoung.” You reach out and tenderly stroke the eldest girl’s hair, who is around eight years old, before moving your eyes to the four year old behind her, “Dambi.”
The youngest smiles and you widen your arm, to which she pads closer and rests within your embrace.
You hug your grandchildren with all the love you have left to offer.
“Grandma!” Nayoung excitedly rambles, placing a frame into your withered hands, “Is the baby in this Mom?”
You take it and flip it around, eyes widening to find the picture of you, a small child in your arms and Namjoon’s hand resting on your shoulder. You’re smiling but your eyes are brimming with tears, as so are his as the baby stays rested within your comfortable embrace.
Your eyes gloss over for a split second, but you sniffle, bringing your attention back to your granddaughter.
“No, it isn’t.” You explain, “It’s my son…. your Uncle Haneul.”
Nayoung stares at you with surprise, glancing at the photo frame again. “Uncle Haneul?”
You slowly nod and she continues to stare with fascination, even glancing back at Dambi and pointing towards it like she had uncovered a hidden secret.
“Where’s Uncle Haneul?” Dambi ponders, and your eyes soften.
“Following in his father’s footsteps.” You whisper, “He became a professor, and he’s been exploring the world for his research.”
Ever since Namjoon passed away. – you want to add.
You take the frame from Nayoung’s hands, “This picture is when he was first born, before your mother was.”
Haneul and Naree. After years of love and even more years of building a life together – a relationship, a marriage, a home, you and Namjoon had decided that you wanted to have kids. Through the ups and downs, the panics of pregnancy to the bliss of becoming parents, you both were blessed with two children that you love dearly.
In return, Haneul had ultimately decided that becoming a parent wasn’t something he had desired, something both you and Namjoon had understood from afar and confirmed when he had brought it up to you. Instead, he wanted to travel and was inclined to be hungry for knowledge, much like Namjoon himself. You had to convince him to leave after Namjoon’s passing, insisting that life was too short and he should be living his, instead of fretting over the family.
On the flip side, Naree married her husband a couple of years back, and you had met your precious granddaughters, Nayoung and Dambi, within that time frame.
Within forty-seven years of marriage, you had seen it all, but it still comes racing back to you in a heartbeat, the memories still so vivid as you stare back at the single snapshot that captured it all.
Nayoung watches you with a smile, and Dambi mumbles something that has light coming back to your eyes.
“You used to be so pretty, Grandma.” The four year old states it so nonchalantly, resulting in her older sister gasping and whipping her head around.
“Hey! Grandma is still pretty.” Nayoung persists.
You deeply sigh, “I’ve gotten old, haven’t I?”
“No, no!” Nayoung furiously shakes her head, “You’re not– …well, you are old, Grandma, but still so pretty!”
A smile cracks onto your lips, long having forgotten what it felt like. Nayoung shifts, eyes growing uneasy.
“Grandma…a-are you crying?”
You sniffle, hurriedly wiping away your tears, The two children stare at you with rounded eyes and you softly chuckle, widening your arms.
“How about you help Grandma feel a bit better?”
Nayoung reacts immediately, launching herself into your arms as you bring her into your lap and rest your head against hers. Dambi crawls up the sofa and you pull her in as well, embracing the two with quivering arms.
Even in this bleak and lonely world, you are relieved to have them by your side.
***
Naree stands by the living room entrance, a cup of tea in her hands.
“Girls, it’s time to wash up and get ready for lunch.” She announces, and the two children glance up, before immediately rising to their feet.
They both give you a quick wave before they’re scurrying away upstairs.
Naree brings the cup and sets it down on the table in front of you.
“Mom.” She calls out and you turn to look at her. “Can we talk?”
A deep sigh leaves you and you sink back into the chair, knowing it was all impossible to avoid.
“I suppose.” You comply and she sits down on the couch opposite you, facing you directly.
“I was talking…to Seojun…” At the topic of her husband, you shift and she continues cautiously, “I know how you feel about Dad, and he does too.”
Your eyes downcast, “But we should really move his things into the storage room, Mom.”
“And what about me?” You chuckle underneath your breath, “Are you eventually going to move me too?”
“Mom.” She chides, letting out a long sigh. She looks tired, just like you. “It’s been a year since Dad passed away.”
And a year since everyone had forgotten about him.
You want to add, but keep silent, “I just think it’s really time to move forward…”
There’s a deep ache within your chest, that only grows with her words. You knew this conversation was inevitable, but how were you to explain?
How were you to explain that ever since Namjoon passed away, you’ve been consumed with an exorbitant amount of feelings that you could barely grasp?
Immense guilt that somehow through all this, you were still here while his death was so sudden. That you were still breathing and intact, all while he had struggled to do the same?
Utter anger that he had left you here all by yourself after spending nearly half a century together, how he didn’t just take you with him, instead of you waking up everyday, longing to see him again.
And of course – the grief. Perhaps the most painful of them all.
You can’t go through his things without breaking down, reopening the jarring wound his demise has left over and over again when you see his clothes, his shoes, his belongings. The last remains of his existence and the last things you can desperately clutch on, mimicking a supposed fabrication of him still being with you.
You wrap your arms around yourself, shaking your head with shut eyes.
“My answer is firm, Naree.”
“Mom.” She exasperatedly says, frustrated with your stubbornness that mimics her own. After all, she’s inherited your personality, except you’ve lived longer with all your experiences exceeding all of hers.
“I’m exhausted.” You simply state, willing your shaking legs to get up. Once they do, you grab onto your cane, trudging towards the staircase.
Naree is silent as she watches you struggling to get up, unable to explain how much grief has been brought to her. Everyday she’s forced to watch her mother fall into a slump, surrounding herself with past memories and unable to break out of her shell. She’s granted only the fleeting moment of your former self when you interact with her daughters, but a part of her always wonders if a part of you had died alongside her father that day, that she ended up losing both her parents in some twisted way.
She rubs her temples, feeling absolutely drained and tired beyond belief.
A week passes by.
There’s barely any change in your routine. You remain within your bedroom majority of the time, sleeping and occasionally being reminded to eat. You don’t speak much, carrying a solemn gaze and a deep frown on your lips.
You don’t see much of Naree or Seojun, both of them occupied with their jobs and not making any effort to speak to you for the duration.
However, one night you find them by the kitchen table, sitting opposite from each other.
It was late into the hours and you had suddenly woken, on your way down for a glass of water.
Naree stills. “Mom–”
“What were you talking about?” You question, and Naree knows.
She knows that you heard pieces of their conversation. The conversation about how drained she felt lately, work taking its everlasting toll on her, right before Seojun suggested taking a vacation and going out on a trip with the family. To the conversation shifting, Naree spilling out her worries and concerns about you, your old age and how much she could see your health deteriorating, to how much she can’t get through to you anymore, how much she’s just given up.
However, what’s caught most of your attention is the sudden mention of a certain kind of home, one that notoriously knows how to take care of the elderly properly.
“We should talk.” Seojun states, pulling out a chair for you. You reluctantly take it, slowly sitting down as your gaze oscillates between them.
Naree sucks in a deep breath, looking at her husband uneasily. “We were thinking…”
“That it might be time for us to try something different.” Seojun finishes, glancing at you intently.
You cut to the chase. “What are you trying to get at?”
There’s a pause and Naree fidgets, eyes focusing onto her hands.
Her next words have you freezing.
“Mom…how would you feel about moving into an old age home?” Naree mutters.
A rigid chuckle leaves you, “So this is what it’s coming to, huh?”
“Mom, please.” Naree insists in defense and if you weren’t so entrapped within your own thoughts, perhaps you would have noticed the fatigue running deep in her eyes or the stiffness in her shoulders, “It’s not an easy decision…but we’ve really thought about this.”
Correction – Seojun has thought about this. You vaguely remember him bringing it up once, much to Naree’s protests and he let it slip by then.
But now, you have grown older and gone through grief, which doesn’t make it implausible to bring up again.
Except this time, you’re alone, not having Namjoon with you anymore to see eye to eye with Seojun as he always did and convincing him that you were better off together.
You miss him so much.
“Your health hasn’t been the same, Mom.” Naree explains, “And both Seojun and I go to work, the girls go off to school and–”
She deeply sighs, eyes becoming glossy. “I know, Mom…I know you’re lonely.”
You squeeze your eyes shut.
“Ever since Dad passed away, I think our relationship has changed,” She simply states, her next words driving a wedge through your heart “…and I don’t think we have the same capability to take care of you anymore.”
You sigh, glancing up to look straight into Naree’s eyes for the first time since Namjoon’s passing.
“It’s the trip too, isn’t it? The girls want to go, but you’ve resisted for a while.” You mention, “You kept saying that I needed you, and that you’ll eventually go, but you had to stay behind because of me.”
Naree winces at how direct you are, not missing a heartbeat of the reality you’ve been noticing since the past year.
Sucking in a breath, you ignore the deep ache residing within your chest, pushing it back into the farthest corner.
“Fine.” You solemnly state, barely having energy anymore. “I’ll go, if that’s what you want.”
Relief breaks out onto Naree’s features and Seojun softly smiles. You suppose it was bound to happen eventually, better sooner than later, and perhaps it would do some good for you, to continue on somehow.
That is, knowing this will be your last days within the home you had once built with Namjoon.
The move happens within a couple of days.
Your bags are packed, with clothes and smaller belongings tossed in. Peering around, you stare at Namjoon’s side of the bed, ready to leave it as it is.
But you step forward, glancing down at the book he was in the middle of reading. It was another dystopian sci-fi book he was curious about, having heard good reviews about it.
You place it into your arms, giving the room one longing look before ultimately shutting the door.
Naree and you sit in the car in silence, as you gaze out the window and reminisce over the passing neighborhood.
You and Namjoon were incredibly young when you had first moved here, hunting down homes and furiously checking the pricing of the housing market. It had been only a couple of weeks since your marriage, both of you fresh out of college and in entry jobs when he had stumbled upon the location, coming up to you with bright eyes one day.
The nostalgia brims in your eyes, but soon Naree is tapping against your shoulder.
“We’re here.” She announces and you nod, before she proceeds to come over and take out your bags.
You glance around with a frown.
It's a small residential area, appearing more like a stretched out home with many windows, accompanied with a garden area at the front that spreads to the back.
Stepping inside, it doesn’t seem to get better.
The walls are a dull white, and sunlight pours in from the windows, nearly blinding you. There’s a reception area that Naree steps closer to talk to, but you stand with a frown still on your lips, peering into the room at the corner, where you can hear laughs and chuckles.
There's a bunch of chairs, with people around your age seated and conversing. They’re smiling alongside each other, while some others are knitting as well as playing cards. It takes you off guard for a moment, not accustomed to seeing so many closer to your age range after being around your own family members for so long.
The place seems to smit a sense of peace with a hint of melancholy, and you’re truthfully not sure about how you feel about it.
“They’re all set-up, Mom.” Naree walks closer to you and you turn, seeing her glance at her watch. “I need to get to work soon.”
You hum and Naree still stands in spot, as if deeply contemplating.
“Mom…I–”
“Have fun with the kids.” You mutter, “Take them to nice places, places they want to see.”
She nods, not lingering for a moment longer as she reluctantly turns around – leaving you all by yourself once again.
It's… unsettling.
Everything follows a schedule and each day repeats, constantly. You’re told when to eat, when to sleep, when to do something fun – as they would like to call it – and the worst part of it all, you’re surrounded by strangers who know each other all too well.
You, in the meanwhile, have been already quoted as being too quiet and solemn, something that makes you want to wrap up into yourself even more. You were never good at connecting with new people, regardless of where you were.
Namjoon was always the sociable one, effortlessly commanding a room with his charm and charisma. You would sheepishly stand next to him, but he would always manage to include you somehow, making you feel less cut off from others.
You let out a sigh – perhaps the only time you actually feel comfort is through the night, tucked underneath the streets with a book wrapped around your cold arms, sniffling as you’re surrounded with unfamiliar things in an unfamiliar room and attempting to lull yourself to sleep.
Because moments like those are where you finally get to welcome his presence wholeheartedly.
You blink,squinting your eyes and raising your hand to block the sun.
Except it’s not the same hand you’re used to – rather it’s no longer wrinkled, with your veins popping out and hands no longer tremoring.
They feel strong, and you open and close your palm a few times astonished.
A pair of small legs tumble into your own and you gasp, glancing down at the boy who has the same features as your husband.
He grins widely, “Mommy!”
“Haneul?!” You harshly whisper, raising the boy before lifting him into your arms. He looks no more than four years old.
Haneul is four, which means can only mean–
You are thirty-four.
Glancing around, your eyes are snapping around frantically – taking in the expansive backyard which you barely would step in anymore, now littered with Nayoung and Dambi’s toys. The house that you left behind, just recently newly renovated upon your insistence. And your son, who looks up at you with wide eyes, as if you’re his entire world.
You attempt to hold him close, biting back the sobs that threaten to take over you.
A loud yelp resonates through the air.
Your breath hitches, knowing that voice from anywhere. Whipping your head around, your legs are stronger, and you take long strides without needing a cane, carrying your son in your arms.
For there’s a small shed in the corner of your backyard and if you’re right, if your memory doesn’t fail you.
The shed needs to be fixed and Namjoon took upon the task himself.
The door goes flying open and his back is the first thing you see.
“Not again…” He sighs, a hand planting against his forehead. There’s a bucket of paint that’s fallen to the ground, along with patches of the white colour sprayed against his ankles.
You slowly set your smiling son down, who giggles and runs to his father. Namjoon instantly looks down, his hand reaching out that Haneul eagerly takes.
Your voice comes out in a choked whisper.
“N-Namjoon?”
He turns with a huge smile and you’ve forgotten. Forgotten how crystal clear your memory once was, knowing his dark hair, crinkled eyes and dimpled smile anywhere. How much that smile hasn’t changed at all, fine lines maring around the corners instead, next to his grey strands of hair and weakened eyes.
How despite the years – he’ll always be the same man you fell in love with.
“Y/N.” He deeply enunciates, concern etching onto his features.
“You’re crying, what– …” He takes long strides towards you, whispering as his hand makes contact with your cheek, “What’s wrong?”
You sniffle, the tears pouring down as you’re no longer able to hold them back.
Namjoon nearly stumbles back when you grasp onto him, wrapping your arms around him tightly. He hugs you back, comfortingly resting his head against your forehead.
“I-I missed you.” You sob out, not wanting to let him go.
“Missed me?” Namjoon softly chuckles, threading his hand through your hair. “I’ve always been here, Y/N.”
He separates you from him, holding onto your shoulders as he tenderly looks into your eyes.
“I’m always here, Y/N.”
You’re suddenly pulled away, away from his comforting embrace and eyes as a white light flashes over your eyes.
You jolt awake, hearing only the faint sound of the heater echoing through the unfamiliar room. Reality crashes down onto you, painfully reminding you of your current location.
The other side of the bed remains cold and empty.
The days churn by, and you are as miserable as ever.
You sit quietly by the side and stare out the window, hearing a few others engage in conversation in small groups. There was something about doing a painting activity, but you had paid it no mind, too focused on the garden outside and grasping onto the book that sits on your lap.
“Before I came here, my husband passed away three years ago.” A voice from afar begins. It comes from a woman, who appears much older than you. “It happened so quickly, I-I didn’t know how to deal with it.”
There's a man sitting next to her, spotting a collared shirt and dark black hair. He looks younger than both of you, and he somberly listens to her.
“How long were you together?” He wonders.
“Fifty-five years.” The woman sadly chuckles, “We spent every day, every moment together…and then one day he was just gone.”
Your heart clenches, no longer staring out the window. You don’t mean to eavesdrop, but you’ve learned it's difficult when you’re surrounded by so many others, stories from so many different phases of life pouring out effortlessly in a single room.
“I’ve heard it all,” She continues. “That he was in a better place, that I would heal with time, even that his time was bound to come soon….I-It hurt, a lot.”
You watch as tears fill her eyes and her sadness fills the small space you’re in, a lump in your throat starting to form. You attempt to pucker your lips, threaten to silence yourself as much as possible, but the words spill out with far too much ease.
“My husband…” You suck in a breath when her gaze falls onto you in surprise. “He…he passed away, about a year ago.”
Her features twist, understanding deep within her eyes.
“I’m so sorry for your loss.”
You give her a half-smile and she presses forward, “How many years?”
“Forty-seven.” You state, adding with a sad note “We never got to fifty…”
She solemnly nods and something in her gaze is just too much, alleviating the tension that has been festering and brewing within you.
“He was kind, a little clumsy and forgetful, but still very kind.” You remorsefully chuckle. “Sometimes, it’s scary, like he’s never existed…and other days, I want to see him again, almost like–”
You silence yourself, eyes clamping shut as a deep ache within your chest just spreads and amplifies.
A voice tugs you out of your thoughts.
“Like what?” It’s the man next to the older woman, his gaze still on you.
Your voice comes out in an anguished whisper, “Like how he visits me in my dreams.”
It sounds strange and bizarre, you know this. But you’re startled when you glance up, only to find that woman giving you a kind look and the man softly smiling, as if he finds the notion to be pleasant.
“It’s nice, isn’t it?” He piques, “Seeing them again, as if they never left to begin with…”
You stare at him in bewilderment, attempting to muster words up.
But he beats you to it.
“Five years.” He informs, like he knew what you wanted to ask. “Since my wife’s been gone.”
You shake your head, not fully realizing his circumstance.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to assume–”
“It’s okay.” He lets out a low chuckle, “I look much younger than I actually am.”
You hum, acknowledging it right away. Alongside appearing younger, you notice his disposition appears to be the same as well, being much laid-back compared to anyone else you’ve seen here.
“What’s your name?” He asks, “I’ve seen you a couple times, but I think this is our first time talking.”
“I-I’m not one for talking much…” You note, but he quirks his head to the side, like he didn’t believe that. “And it’s Y/N, Kim Y/N.”
“I’m Jung Hoseok.” He introduces, gesturing to the woman next to him. “This is Lee Haewon.”
She directs a friendly smile towards you and you attempt to return it back.
“How old are both of you?” You wonder.
“I’m eighty-five.” Haewon answers, squinting her eyes at the man, “Last I remember, Hoseok is sixty-seven.”
“Seventy, Haewon.” He politely corrects, but with no malice. Almost as if he was expecting for her to get it wrong.
She deeply exhales, shaking her head in exasperation.
“My own name is going to be next.”
“Don’t worry about that.” His eyes flicker to you, “When the time comes, we’ll be here to remind you again.”
You nod in assurance and she warmly smiles, placing her cold hand on top of yours. You slowly grasp onto it and Haewon doesn’t move at all, instead ushering for you to sit closer to them.
For once, the weight on your chest feels a bit lighter.
The next day, you’re placed in groups again.
However, this time the head of the home brings out various board games onto the tables, to which everyone requests for different ones and are soon creating circles.
Despite the head asking for you to join this time, you sit in the same spot you had previously sat at, right beside the window as your eyes take in the others playing.
The loud sound of a chair screeching against the floor startles you.
Hoseok looks up with an apologetic smile, a packet of cards in his hands.
You watch with bafflement at how he sets up the deck before you, leaning over to hand you a couple of them.
You take them reluctantly, wondering why he was here when he could just play with someone else, observing him lean back in his chair and cross his legs with a furrow in his brows.
Now knowing his age, it was easier to spot his older features. How, despite having better functioning legs compared to you, his back is slightly hunched, shoulders beginning to cave in. How, despite having a majority of darker strands, there were noticeable specks of grey in his hair. How his eyes have to so occasionally squint to look at the cards, a hearing aid poking out from his right ear as he tilts his head.
You also don’t fail to notice how as his brows furrow in concentration, two small dimples poke out from the corners of his cheeks.
“Your turn.” He calls out, having placed a card down.
You quickly look down at the cards, reluctantly placing one down. He continues to stare at his own intently.
“You know, it was nice of you to talk to Haewon.” He mentions.
You shake your head, “It wasn’t much, I was just talking about my husband anyways.”
“It meant more to her than you think.” He exhales, placing a card down. “Most folks here either ignore her, or tell her to just move on.”
A knowing smile crosses him, “I think we both know it isn’t as simple as that.”
“It never is.” You quietly mumble, placing a card down yourself.
Hoseok hums at that, putting another card down. You glance around warily, wondering why you hadn’t seen Haewon yet.
“By the way, where is she?”
“Asleep, I overheard that she felt tired.” Hoseok does a half-smile, before it’s replaced with his usual nonchalant expression.
You nod, curious about their proximity, “Have you known her for long?”
Hoseok shrugs, “A bit, I just got to know her in the past couple of months. You know, the good ol’ chit chatting with one other while being in the same room.”
His straight-forwardness catches you off guard, shocked by how settled he was.
“You seem pretty comfortable being here.” You note, observing him as he glances up.
“I have to be.” He states with a lop-sided smile, “It’s the same for everyone here. After all, nobody came because they wanted to.”
You freeze, forehead creasing as you stare at him blankly. Hoseok’s gaze lands on you, confusion running through it.
“Y/N?” He ponders, wondering why you weren’t playing your turn. You snap out of your daze, placing your cards down.
“I-I just remembered something I needed to do–” You quietly say, slowly rising to your feet and locating your cane. “Maybe you should play with someone else…”
For a split-second, Hoseok tosses his cards and rises to his feet, as if to halt your steps. But you’re already walking away and he falters, slumping back down into his seat
His eyes are tinged with an indescribable emotion.
You don’t know if you can be here any longer.
But there’s nothing you can do about it. The days pass by and no one comes for you, no one tries to see how you are, how you’re feeling and it dawns one simple resolution to you.
You’ve been abandoned here. Forever.
The next day arrives and you clench your jaw, stepping out of the suffocating room that has been starting to feel more like a decorated prison than anything else. You wonder if you should come up with some excuse of staying back, preoccupying yourself with anything else rather than the activity of the day.
But that’s until you’re informed you’ll be taken to the garden.
Taking a step outside, it’s absolutely serene. There’s handfuls of well-maintained roses, peonies and tulips flourishing, all lush and blooming around the home. It’s both tranquil and inviting, the head informing you that there were watering cans, shovels and new seeds to be planted for everyone.
You secure a can right away, propelling yourself forward with your cane towards the peonies.
A small smile lines your lips.
“Y/N!”
You spin around, in the midst of cooing and feeding your one year daughter as she babbles on her high chair.
Namjoon stands at the door, huffing with a wide smile on his lips.
He raises his hand, a single purple peony sticking out.
You gasp in astonishment, “You finally grew one!”
“I did!” He exclaims. It had been months since he had been trying, your home littered with his bonsai collection until he wanted to try his hand at outdoor planting.
He dashes over and scoops you in her arms, making you chuckle from his victory. Grabbing onto your hand, he edges you to follow.
“Come on, you need to help me water them!”
Laughing, you grasp onto Naree, letting him guide you.
The water pours out from the small canister, sprinkling delicately onto the small petals. You watch with so much fondness, for so much love for the flower, as your hands continue to tremble.
It slips from your hands and smacks against the pavement.
You watch as the water spills everywhere and with a huff, quickly attempting to grasp it. But your knees violently shake, and your hands tremor far too much. You attempt again and again to bend down, but your attempts are all futile, more and more of the contents emptying and spreading out.
Tears unknowingly prick at your eyes and your breathing is heavy, limbs aching from the sudden physical exertion.
The smooth metal gently glides across your fingertips.
You blink, confused eyes glancing up to meet Hoseok’s softened ones. You’re left frozen as he carefully tips it, his hand grasping the canister against yours and letting the water rain over the peonies.
You let him guide you, the water running through the remaining ones before it empties.
“Wait here for a moment.” He directs you to a bench, holding your hands as you carefully descend down onto it.
You observe as he saunters over to the hose, filling it with water again before letting out a satisfied hum. He then manages to grasp onto a handful of seeds and grabs onto a small shovel.
He returns to you, “You should plant some too.”
You quietly nod and he reaches his arm out, as if gesturing for you to hold on. You grasp onto him and he slows his pace, walking at yours.
Everytime, you point at a certain spot, he leans down, making a hole into the dirt before dropping the seed in and sealing it with fresh water. He does it along the edge of the garden, right where the window to your room should be.
He lets out a loud huff with the last one, chest rising and falling alarmingly.
Your eyes widen, having completely forgotten his condition of age.
“I-I’ll go get you some water.”
Hoseok opens his mouth to protest that he’s okay, but you’re already propelling yourself forward, cane frantically hitting against the pavement.
He wheezes, letting out a couple of coughs before you’re standing near him, a water bottle in your hands that he gratefully accepts.
“Are you okay?” You ask right away and he nods, turning to the flowers.
“They’re beautiful.” He states and you hum, the wind weaving through the air.
“I love peonies.” You quietly admit, and Hoseok grins, handing you the water bottle.
He takes a couple steps forward, drawing closer to the older batch. Among all the colors, he snatches onto a bright orange peony, handing it to you with a soft smile.
You bring it closer to you, the corners of your mouth upturning.
It reminds you of the warm hues of the sun.
Your hands tremor and shake, bone sticking out from your softened skin. It doesn’t help that the joints within your bones are incredibly stiff and deeply ache with each movement.
A frustrated sigh escapes your lips, and the needles looped in yarn falling down to your lap.
Hoseok chuckles, reaching out and grasping onto where you’ve left off, attempting his hardest to cross them, pushing one needle into one end and looping it around.
“You’ve missed a stitch.” You point out and he frowns, noticing the small hole he’s created instead.
“Now how did that happen?” He deeply ponders, and a small smile tugs on your lips as he carefully inspects the placement, staring at it up and down.
“You have to loop it carefully,” You softly explain, reaching over to place your trembling hand on his, “It should go through this stitch and then you let go of it to create the knot.”
He follows your instructions, observing as you slowly tug his hand away from the loop, letting it unravel into a perfect stitch.
Hoseok beams, throwing a grin in your direction and you look at him amused.
“I think we make a lovely team.”
You smile lop-sidely, “I don’t know, it’s more of me telling you what to do.”
“A very important role.” He notes, raising the yarn up in his hands, “After all, this is now our group project.”
You chuckle at that and he gazes at you fondly, eyes crinkling.
“Kim Y/N?” The sound of your name has both you and Hoseok glancing up, “There’s someone here at the front foyer asking for you.”
Your brows furrow, but then you catch the sight of a familiar silhouette.
You scramble up from your seat, vision fixated on the backside of the person. Hoseok notices, immediately rising to his feet and handing you your cane, observing as you attempt to hurriedly stride over to the desk.
“Naree.” You whisper, watching your daughter turn around wide-eyed.
“Mom.” She steps forward, and you don’t hesitate to reach out, enveloping your trembling hands tightly around her shoulders.
“You’re here, you’re actually here.” Your eyes are glossy. “I-I thought you left me by myself, I kept thinking about–”
You freeze, surveying the way Naree’s eyes downturn, face void of expression.
It doesn’t take long for you to connect the dots.
Your voice cracks, “You’re not here for me, are you…?”
Naree sighs, “I was just on my way to work, and thought I’d stop by to see you.”
“That’s all?” You mutter, but Naree latches onto your arm.
“Mom.” She chides, but you don’t even want to look at her, “Isn’t this all better for you? You’re not lonely anymore.”
“You’re wrong.” You feel more abandoned than ever. “And this all isn’t better for me, it’s better for you.”
Your words are venomous and the corner of Naree’s mouth twitches.
“How can you say that?” Naree sharply rebuttals. The two of you don’t notice all the lingering eyes watching your interaction, including Hoseok’s. “I want you to come back, but I discussed it with Seojun and we agreed you’d be happier here.”
“And where was I in this decision?” You snap. “Or are Seojun’s words now more important than mine?”
Naree’s nostrils flare and she looks like she’s had enough.
She shakes her head, mumbling to coax herself. “Here I thought that dropping by was a good idea.” Her gaze is directly on you, hurt swirling in her eyes. “But now I’ve realized I made a big mistake.”
Naree turns on her heels, her fists clenched and rage enveloping every fiber of her being. You don’t make a move to stop her, simply staring at her backside and the growing gap each of her steps creates.
There’s a deep ache within the center of your chest, one that expands and spreads, consuming you completely as your daughter abandons you once again.
***
Everything feels like it’s crashing down.
You’re seated within your room, having dismissed yourself and leaving your knitting session with Hoseok behind. You desperately needed to be alone, mind plaguing over and over with the image of Naree leaving, disappointment and rage embedded into her being.
You wonder if you should have reached out, should have begged, for her to take you alongside with her. To take you back to the home you once shared with Namjoon and your family, wanting to feel the familiarity and the warmth that home contains.
A sci-fi book rests within your lap, fingertips clenching onto it. You wonder if he can see everything, hear everything about the family you’ve created leaving you behind, casting you away like a mere thought that shoulders over them.
Thick tears drop down, staining the paper of the book in your hands. Anguished cries leave you, shoulders shuddering as everything crumbles.
You want to see him again, want to wrap your arms around him as he holds you comfortingly, want to have him shield you away from all these terrifying thoughts, ones that are absent of him. You hate how fast he was taken away, and wonder why he couldn’t have just taken you along with him.
A soft knock resonates against the door.
You peer up, cheeks stained with tears and breaths coming out choked. You quickly set the book down, raising your sleeve to wipe away any existence of them.
Padding slowly through the room, you wrap your hand around the knob and carefully open it.
Hoseok stands in front of you, gaze downcasted and shoulders hunched in. It takes you by surprise, never having seen such a lack of optimism in his form.
He looks up, eyes welling with tears.
“Y/N.” He chokes, orbs widening at your appearance. “I-I can come again.”
Before he can turn, you reach out, barely managing to graze his shirt.
The expression he holds draws fear out from you. “I-Is everything okay?
He pursues his lips, like he was attempting to prevent himself from tearing up, before he breathes out the words.
“N-No, not really…” He sniffles, a lone tear escaping him. “H-Haewon…Haewon’s gone.”
Your breath hitches, features twisting. “S-She just passed an hour ago…in her sleep.”
His shoulders slump, eyes squeezing shut.
“I-I couldn’t say g-goodbye….”
You step forward, arms wrapping around him in an instant. Hoseok shrinks within them, harsh sobs shuddering through his body. Tears unleash from your eyes, fisting the material of his shirt.
You don’t know how long you stay like that, wrapped around in your collective grief.
You are dazed.
You find out that aside from being widowed, Haewon only had one son who was in a different country. He doesn’t come to the funeral, and it’s simply attended by a few individuals she had the opportunity to connect with at the old age home.
Which includes you and Hoseok, standing next to each other in black clothing as you watch her casket be buried alongside her husband. Hoseok is silent the entire time, eyes empty.
You knew you weren’t as close to her as Hoseok was, but Haewon was a woman that had given you compassion when you had been desperately searching for it, not even hesitating to listen to your story. She shared the experience of having lost her husband and you recall Hoseok mentioning that she wanted to see him again, even if it meant being in the next life.
You didn’t speak much to Lee Haewon, but she was such a crystal clear reflection of you – a woman dwindling with so much grief that she could barely hold.
Her casket is completely buried and you reach out as Hoseok shudders, a tsunami of emotions hitting him all at once. Your wrinkled hand slides in with his, clutching onto it. He squeezes back tightly, as if you were the only thing anchoring him to reality.
You quietly part together, bidding her your final farewell.
Something is never the same in you after Haewon’s passing.
It’s difficult to explain, the tightening sensation that coils around in your chest with no means of stopping. Your mind flashes back to instances with her, the kind and friendly smile she would always adorn. Or the way her hand was cold but still so warm, ushering you to come closer to her.
It’s crushing, unable to bear with how fast life moves, clutching onto those whose time is no longer needed on earth.
And it’s coupled with another feeling, one that is more erratic and rapid, making you nearly hyperventilate the more you sit in your room, the more you stare at the unfamiliar walls encasing around you at all four corners.
It feels like it’s all you’ll be left with, bidding your own time goodbye within them.
Which is why you leave, heading out your room door and into the garden. You don’t want to follow a schedule, or do activities, simply asking for permission to escape for a brief moment so you feel like you can breathe once again.
And it seems like you’re not the only one with the same idea.
Hoseok sits on a bench a bit farther from the garden and house, his backside facing you and against the sun that begins to rise, peeking through the grass and illuminating its rays through the orange sky.
It draws you in, and you walk forward in a daze.
You slowly sit down, back resting against the wood and setting your crane to the side. Hoseok’s attention flickers over to you.
You quirk up a soft smile, “Couldn’t sleep?”
He blinks after a moment, shaking his head with a sigh.
“No….no, not really.”
You hum, knowingly. “The sunrise is beautiful.”
He nods silently.
You sit in silence, enjoying the breeze wafting through the area and the way the clouds move rotationally, drifting through the clouds. The orange hues morph into the briefest of purple, light spreading over your skin and remaining within your irises.
You suck in a sharp inhale.
“Kim Namjoon.” You state as Hoseok turns to look at you, “My husband, who left me a year ago. He was followed by Kim Naree, my daughter, who left me a month ago.”
His eyes find your own. “And then followed by Lee Haewon, who left us a week ago.”
Your voice breaks. “I-I don’t know if I can handle anyone else leaving me...”
Hoseok’s hand reaches out, placing it on top of yours.
The corner of his mouth remorsefully curls up. “Don’t count me out so easily.”
You smile, for the first time in weeks, and the sunrise takes over the sky.
Taking up the opportunity, you vocalize all your innermost thoughts, “I’m not sure if I exactly belong here…I know I feel less lonely at least, but I don’t know if I can stay anymore.”
“You want to leave.” Hoseok states, like he understands.
Your words hold an infinite amount of weight, “I-I’m just…terrified. Terrified that I’ll be spending my last days here.”
“Where do you want to go?” He genuinely questions.
“Home.” You let out a low chuckle, “If that’s even possible anymore.”
“It can be.” Hoseok softly smiles, two dimples showcasing on his face.
You reach out, clasping onto his head. “Come with me…please.”
You know it’s a completely selfish request, especially when he seems to be much more comfortable here.
But you forget that Hoseok has lost as well, defeat encasing the man more and more as the days draw out. It seems like you’re still his anchor, drawing him back before he’s completely gone.
His hand tightens his hold on you.
“Let’s go home,Y/N.”
You stand in front of your home.
It wasn't easy coming here. You had to be granted permission to leave the vicinity and it wasn’t the simplest task for Hoseok either, needing to prove the two of you would be functional to do so. You suppose you could have laced it over with a visit, but you couldn’t stay any longer, not there anymore.
A shaky exhale leaves you and Hoseok reaches out, lacing his fingers with yours and having a comforting smile.
You knock against the door.
The door comes swinging wide open and you’re confronted with the sight of your son-in-law.
Seojun stares at you blankly, as if you were a mere ghost, glancing between you and Hoseok in disbelief.
“Nice to see you again.” You state, stepping into the household. It looks the same – the same couch, the same curtains and the same memories. It’s almost like you never left to begin with.
“You’re back.” A voice acknowledges from the staircase, and you look up.
Your eyes lock onto Naree’s, who stands in the long hallway, arms crossed and holding a hardened gaze.
“You look like you’ve been well.” You reply with a smile, but her gaze is concentrated on the man standing with you.
“Who is this?” She questions, and your eyes widen.
Hoseok immediately steps up with a friendly smile, “My name is Jung Hoseok. It’s nice to meet you.”
Naree stares at Hoseok’s outstretched hand, not moving to shake it or say anything back. After years of raising her, you know exactly what her response means.
She’s inspecting him, wondering why you showed up out of the blue with a man near the same age as her father.
She doesn’t say another word, simply turning her back and walking into the kitchen. It makes you want to almost laugh, how it doesn’t take her much effort to easily disregard you at this point, so much that it doesn’t even hurt and you simply just expect it.
Seojun glances between the two of you, clearly taken aback with the situation and unsure of how to react.
You walk past him, heading up the staircase with Hoseok.
“I’ll be in my room.” You declare, the door shutting behind you.
***
All of it has been moved.
Despite the house not changing, the people have changed, and so have the contents of the room you once shared with Namjoon.
All of his belongings are gone, stowed away in airtight boxes.
Like he never even existed to begin with.
Your shaking hands reach out. “No…no, no–”
You stumble, collapsing onto the ground.
“Y/N!” Hoseok reaches forward in an instant, steadying you.
“Everything’s gone, Hoseok. They moved everything–”
Tears are streaming down your eyes and Hoseok is clutching onto you as you sob.
“Shh, it’s not gone.” He coaxes, reaching out for one of the boxes. His hands are tremoring but he still claws at the tape, unraveling the plastic back and tossing it aside. The box unfolds and he shifts it over to you, wanting you to see your husband’s things first hand.
You catch sight of one of his jacket’s.
Reaching out, you gasp onto the material, staring at it in awe. It was one Namjoon used to love to wear, tossing it on when you would ask him to go out on walks with you, or consequently the one that was placed on your shoulders when he noticed you shivering in the wake of fall.
You wrap it around your arms, the amount of comfort from the action easing your heart a bit.
Hoseok softly smiles, shifting over another box. He opens it to reveal a stack of books, distinctly looking similar to the one you always carried in your lap.
“Did he like to read a lot?” He ponders, and you nod, curiously looking over his shoulder.
It all snaps – and the excitement washes over more quickly than you can stop it.
“He did.” You lean over, grasping onto a title, “This was one of his favorites, he used to read it all the time. And this one,” You pick up another title, “He used it for his final thesis back in college, and asked me to read it with him.”
You chuckle, tears still streaming down your eyes. “He was always so smart, but asked me to check over everything he did.” You turn to Hoseok, who has softened eyes, “He was just an overthinker, you know? And I knew I always had to calm his mind somehow, so I would make him tea often when he was working.”
Hoseok simply watches. Watches at how much love you pour out for your late husband, how much adoration is in your voice and the tenderness in your eyes. It’s something he’s only had the pleasure of experiencing once in life, and it’s not something he’s found easily in others.
Namjoon is truly your soulmate.
“H-He would ask what magic I would p-put in it….all the time.” Your voice cracks at the end and Hoseok’s eyes shoot up into alarm.
“Y/N?” He shifts closer to you.
“I-I….” You squeeze your eyes shut, the realization donning faster than you can stop it. “I-I just can’t.”
“You can’t what?”
“I can’t.” You gasp out. “Namjoon, he’s….he’s everywhere.”
You can see him everywhere – in the things you hold, in the memories you’re left with, in the hopes and dreams you once had together. Your entire life had been constructed around him, and it’s something you didn’t notice until you were sitting in that very same room you shared, surrounded by his entire essence.
It's like you’re experiencing the grief all over again, except this time it’s worse because you’ve realized what you’ve truly lost.
Hoseok feels his own heart shattering into pieces. He can’t explain how much he knows exactly what you’re going through, how much letting go was an impossible task when you’ve had years and years, an entire timeline spent with someone after an eternal promise of forever.
A tear streams down his own eye and he moves closer, wrapping his arms around you and leaning his head against yours.
“H-Hoseok, I-I can’t….” You whisper, “I can’t live the rest of my life here. In only the memory of Namjoon and with a family that just doesn’t want me anymore….I-I just can’t do it.”
Hoseok shudders, letting out a small hum as you spill all your fears out to him.
“I-It’s okay, Y/N.” He manages to get out, “It’s okay to feel this way. I-I can’t even explain to you how normal it is to.”
– or how familiar. – he wants to say.
You sob and he parts from you, gazing into your eyes as he cups your face.
“What do you want, Y/N?” He earnestly questions. “What is your heart telling you?”
“I just want to leave….and go somewhere far, far away.” Far from here.
It almost sounds like a ridiculous fantasy, but Hoseok nods.
“How far?” He seriously ponders, “Like can we get there by bus? Do we need to take a train?”
The corner of your mouth curls up.
“Maybe by train. Buses are horrible to sit on for long hours.” You note with a sniffle.
Hoseok frowns, “You make it sound like we’re so old.”
“We are old, Hoseok.” You chuckle and he grins at the sound of it.
“Really? Say that again for me, I didn’t hear you the first time.” He turns his head, showcasing his hearing aid. You lightly hit his chest, before resting your head against him.
“I’ll take you wherever you want to go, Y/N.” He whispers in reassurance.
Reaching his hand, he lifts you up, ensuring your balance is okay. You keep your hand in his, tightening your hold on him.
***
You regain yourself, and Hoseok carefully holds onto you, taking you slowly down the stairs. He matches his steps with you, watching as your foot slowly descends down one step before planting his own down, your cane granting you the momentum.
Naree stands by the door, arms crossed and appearing to be waiting for someone.
Hoseok glimpses at you tenderly and you nod, alerting her attention to the sound of your cane against the ground.
She deeply sighs, “I have time to drop you back once you’re–”
“I’m not going back.”
Her brows furrow “What do you mean?”
“I’m leaving, Naree.” You declare, and that’s when her eyes snap onto yours and Hoseok’s interlaced hands.
There’s disbelief in her eyes, “You’re leaving with him?”
You nod and Naree shakes her head, as if her entire existence is being questioned.
“Mom, how could you?” She spits, “It’s only been a year since Dad passed away.”
“Naree–”
“I know you were feeling lonely, but out of all things this?”
The door suddenly widens and Seojun emerges, two little girls by his side.
Nayoung's eyes light up, “Grandma!”
“What’s going on?” Seojun interjects and Naree squeezes her eyes, shaking her head.
“Oh nothing, just my mother betraying my father.” She snaps, and his eyes widen.
He pushes Nayoung and Dambi away, “Girls, go upstairs.”
Nayoung begins to protest “But Grandma–”
“Go.”
She doesn’t say another word, simply downcasting her gaze. Dambi follows, but you can feel their gazes linger on you, and there’s nothing more you want to do in the moment then to bring the two girls into your arms.
“Naree, don’t do this.” You whisper, but her clenched fists are enough of an answer.
“Don’t do what? Be upset that my mother found someone else that isn’t my father?” She huffs, “How could you do this, Mom?”
She turns to Seojun who comforts her and you shift uncomfortably, wanting to disappear.
“With all due respect–” A previously silent voice pitches in, “I think you’re being incredibly unfair.”
You stare at Hoseok, who still holds a warm look in his eyes. “I’m not replacing your father, if that’s what you’re concerned about. Y/N still loves him very much, just like I do my wife.”
“But it wouldn’t hurt to consider that your mother has been by herself for quite a while and that hurts.” Hoseok sadly smiles, “Much deeper than you could possibly imagine.”
Naree looks at him startled and Seojun is baffled. There’s a silence that lingers and Hoseok tightens his hold on you, slowly heading towards the door.
“It was nice meeting all of you.” He simply responds, before leaving altogether.
There’s a multitude of words ready to tumble from you.
“Hoseok, I–”
“You don’t need to explain.” He insists, but then he shakes his head, as if suspended in disbelief. “I just can’t believe how they were treating you...”
You wince, finding yourself agreeing with his words. It seemed like all your doubts, all your fears, were cemented right in front of you and now you know.
You don’t belong there anymore.
You’re about to turn and tell Hoseok that you should collectively leave now, the desperation of going far away reaching a complete high, but that’s when your eyes catch onto movement.
“Hold on.” you quietly say, and Hoseok sends you a confused look. You carefully trudge your cane forward, slowly walking to the side of the house.
You freeze.
There's a silhouette of a tall man with dark hair standing by the garden, right next to the peonies and with a giant bag slung over his shoulder. His backside gives you so much whiplash at how distinctly familiar it looks and as if in a trance, you continue to move forward with furrowed brows.
You pause, the disbelief sinking in. He snaps his head around at the sound of your cane, narrowed eyes widening.
You whisper out his name, breath coming out shaky.
“H-Haneul?”
You had almost forgotten just how strikingly similar he looks to Namjoon, just how much he could easily be mistaken for a younger version of the man.
He widely smiles, expression brightening at the sight of you.
“Hi, Mom.” He takes long strides towards you, embracing you immediately. You wrap your arms around him tightly, a joyful smile on your lips.
You separate from him, attempting to get a good look at your son. “I-I can’t believe you’re here…”
He warmly grins, eyes flickering over to Hoseok. You immediately turn, a bit flustered.
“T-This is–”
“Jung Hoseok.” Hoseok outstretches his hand with a smile.
“Kim Haneul.” He states, shaking his hand with a similar smile. He gestures to you. “I’m her oldest.”
Hoseok nods understandably, “It’s nice to meet you, Hoseok.”
He grins and you’re a bit taken aback at Hanuel's gesture, naturally giving back the same courtesy that was given back to him.
He hasn’t changed one bit.
“Could we talk?” He mentions, gesturing between you. You nod immediately and Hoseok politely smiles, stepping towards the front to give you some privacy.
Haneul holds your hand as you slowly walk, guiding you onto the bench in the backyard. He waits as you sit down, taking a spot by you.
As glad as you are to see him, you’re curious.
“How are you here, Haneul?”
“I came by to visit.” He explains, “I managed to get a couple of days off.”
You nod, “Naree… she told me you were in an old age home.”
“I see….” You fall into silence and Haneul quietly watches you from the corner of his eyes.
“Was it your choice?”
“At first, it was.” You exhale, “But then Naree never came for me, and when she did, she wanted me to stay–” Your words grow smaller, “And now, I just can’t go back anymore….”
Haneul lifts his hand, placing it on top of your wrinkled one as you heave, eyes getting glossy.
“His name is Hoseok.” You sputter out, wanting to rid him of any worries, “We met at the care home and got closer. I feel better with him around, and he understands me, but I’m not trying to replace your father in the least–”
“Hey, hey.” He softly says, “Who said anything about replacing Dad?”
“Naree did… and I don’t blame her.”
Her words have you thinking twice, wondering if everything you were doing was just wrong.
Haneul frowns, “Mom, Naree’s husband isn’t dead.”
“Don’t say such things, Haneul.” You chide.
“Mom, listen to me.” He fully turns to you, taking your worn out hands in his stronger ones. “Dad’s gone, and you’re all by yourself now. You don’t owe anyone anything, especially not at this age.”
He knowingly grins, “What was the advice you had given to me before I left?”
The memory is still crystal clear to you. “That life was too short…and that you should be living your own, without fretting over the family.”
“And you told me this after Dad’s passing.” He persists, “Why can’t you give yourself the same consideration?”
You slowly nod, taking in his words. “You’re right…”
But then an amused chuckle leaves you and his eyes widen.
“You know, you sound so much like your father that it’s actually terrifying….”
He looks amused, “Well, he was one heck of a wise man.”
He laughs and so do you, feeling your chest grow a bit lighter.
Haneul exhales, something in his gaze abruptly changing.
“Mom, you’ve gotten older. The last time I saw you, you weren’t this weak.” He admits, “I just really want you to leave while you’re still able to.”
You look up at him, water welling up in your eyes. There’s an unsaid message sent between both of your eyes, one that you unfortunately understand very well.
This very well may be the last time you see him.
You advance forward, wrapping your shaking hands around his shoulders. He leans down, holding onto you in a loving embrace.
It makes you wonder where time went, where the boy that was running around the house with giggles and helping his dad with fixing the shed went, becoming a fully fledged adult who you could express your deepest concerns to, and lean on as you grew brittle.
***
Haneul walks you back to the front, exchanging a smile with Hoseok who had been patiently waiting for you. He reaches his arm out and you hold onto it.
Haneul enters the house again, insisting to bring the bags you had packed. You discuss with Hoseok about your plans moving forward, but the door comes bursting open.
Two young girls come forth, tears in their eyes.
“Grandma!”
Nayoung launches herself at you, embracing you immediately. Dambi is behind her, eyes flickering all over your form.
A small chuckle leaves you and Hoseok smiles at the interaction, watching at how you comfortingly rub their backs as they sob into your floral dress.
“U-Uncle Haneul says you’re leaving…” Dambi mumbles out.
A sigh slips out from you and Haneul emerges with remorse on his face, appearing like he attempted to keep it a secret but couldn’t to no avail.
“I am leaving.” You’re completely honest with them. “I know it’s hard, and I’ll miss the two of you greatly, but I….I need to go.”
Nayoung and Dambi look at you thoughtfully, nodding their heads, “And I won’t be alone either.”
You turn to Hoseok who smiles, causing both of the girls to be captivated with his appearance.
“Will you be looking after Grandma?” Nayoung wonders and he softly nods, a certain fondness in his eyes you haven’t seen before.
“I will be.” He says, “Someone has to remind her not to be so stubborn.”
You exasperatedly shake your head with a chuckle as Hoseok grins, but Nayoung moves closer to you, a dimpled smile on her lips.
“I’ll miss you, Grandma.” She whispers, hugging you. “Please be happy.”
You’re astonished at her words, wondering just how obvious you had been. You know the saying that children have a tendency to see everything and there’s something that shines in Nayoung’s eyes that makes you sniffle, hugging the girl tightly in your arms.
Hoseok helps you with your cane and you clutch onto him, afraid that a part of you will never want to leave if you didn’t. You watch as the two girls wave their hands at you, huge smiles on their lips. Haneul stands by the door, leaning against it with a grin.
You wave back at them, even noticing Naree by the window, sticking her eyes out despite her crossed arms. You want to chuckle, amused how obvious your daughter could be at times.
Taking one look back, you see all that you’ve built with Namjoon. Your house, your children, your grand-children, the years and years of your lifetime all showcased within your field of vision. You smile, wondering if the man was still alive, how he probably would have been standing alongside them, ushering you to be on your way already.
Turning around, Hoseok holds onto your bags, a smile on his lips.
You take his hand with your own.
The next couple of days are a bit of a blur for you. You find out Hoseok had booked a train for you into the nearby city, one that wasn’t luckily drawn out for too many hours. He calls a cab to pick you up and you’re soon in front of train tracks as he holds you, slowly helping you on.
You spend the rest of the duration looking out, watching at how buildings, greenery and the life you once knew whizzes by. It makes you wonder when the last time was when you’ve done something like this, recalling the last trip you ever took was with Namjoon and years before the two of you had started finding it difficult to do.
You arrive after a couple of hours, your joints aching a bit which prompts Hoseok to seat you down onto a bench, attempting to find a water bottle for you to drink. It amuses you a bit to see others glancing at you, seeing a much older couple traveling together rather than a youthful one. Instead of energy and fresh eyes, they see peacefulness and serene ones, and it all the more makes you want to smile once more, no longer feeling like you were being trapped or held back somewhere.
You arrive at a small residence that Hoseok took care of.
He turns to put the bags away and you clasp onto his wrist. “Hoseok.”
He glances at you and you sincerely look at him. “Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”He warmly smiles.
“What should we do now?” You ponder, “Everything I said was completely on a whim, but I still don’t know–”
“Hey.” He softly calls out, slipping next to you and placing a hand on your own. “Don’t stress too much about it. I’ve booked us this place here to stay for the week, and you can take your time before officially deciding where to go.”
You stare at him in surprise, feeling so grateful that he is here with you.
“Okay.” You quietly say and he gets up with a grin, moving to unpack a bag.
That night, you lay awake on a bed adjacent to Hoseok. He doesn’t sleep next to you, but still remains in the room, the sound of his soft breathing echoing off the walls.
Your mind is brimming with endless possibilities, and for the first time ever, you fall asleep with a smile on your lips.
You desire a home.
A home. A place of comfort – a place that welcomes you with open arms and loosens the tightness in your chest, a place that allows you to breathe easier and fills you with warmth, a place full of solace, one which soothes your aching heart.
It’s not much, a small house out by the fields and close to a meadow, far out from the city and next to an expansive lake. The wind ever so breezes over the numerous flowers collecting in the open fields and the sun is always shining over, reflecting over the pools of water. You have your occasional neighbors, mainly families that harbor residences nearby to spend their idle time. It’s always interesting when they run into you, assuming an entire family to be inside only to find an elderly lady smiling back at them.
It was something you didn’t get instantaneously, searching around for the exact spot you wanted. In a way, you still thank your late husband for always advising you to keep money on the side, indicating that you would need it one day for when he was gone and you would always chide him not to bring the bad thoughts into mention. It led you to a place you would have never in a million years thought you would have ended up at, and never with the amount of pure joy it’s brought.
You desire a home, and somehow, just somehow, you find one in Jung Hoseok.
He takes you everywhere you desire, whether it is walking down the borders of the lake, to watching the skyline of the far city. He’s always two steps ahead of you, picking up your cane when it stumbles and interlacing his hands with you, letting you lean your weight against him. He assists you with your gardening and sets up two rocking chairs outside of the cabin, sitting down for hours with you as you read.
He’ll joke that his legs are getting too shaky when he walks with you, or that the tremors in his hands are always at a constant beat. He’ll smile with fine lines marring his forehead and the creases of his eyes when you chide him, just as he insists that he has no reason for his constant remarks around you. He’ll look at you tenderly, watching as every word spills out of you, even after you recall an eternity of memories with someone else.
There comes a point where your small thank you’s disappear altogether, and you clasp onto his hand instead.
“It’s so beautiful.” You whisper, watching the rays of the sun descend, catching a warm hue of orange all over the meadow. It transcends over the horizon, illuminating the delicate lines on your face and specks of your irises.
Hoseok hums next to you on the bench, your arm around his. He watches as the sun slowly dips into the horizon, the orange submerging before a cool blue takes over.
“It is.” He murmurs, “Kinda makes you think how small you really are.”
You let out a soft laugh and he grins in your direction.
“You always have such a way with words.” You remarks.
“Well, I think it’s one of my best qualities.” He retorts, “Aside from knitting, of course.”
You shake your head as he chuckles. The sun completely disappears and he glances at you.
“Say, how about we head in and I brew us some hot tea?” He suggests, slipping his warm hands within your cold ones.
You stare at him for a second, expression impassible. Hoseok frowns, a deep crease forming between his brows.
“Y/N?” He ponders at your silence.
“I’m so lucky to have met you.”
Hoseok blinks, but the words tumble out much faster than you can stop.
“I was so, so alone, and absolutely terrified that the rest of my life would be like that.” Water surfaces in your eyes, “But then I met you and I never realized how much I missed this feeling of…being alive.”
A bright smile stretches on your cheeks, “I’m so happy, Hoseok.”
You don’t have a chance to swipe away your tears, his arms coming to encase around you in an instant. A gasp leaves you, but Hoseok tightens his hold and you lean against him, arms slipping around his back.
“Y-You don’t understand…” He whispers, voice cracking that makes you stiff with alarm. “You don’t understand how much I feel the same way.”
He separates from you, irises glossed over. It’s a look you’ve noticed before in his eyes, a look that speaks volumes compared to his usual warm and cheerful disposition, a look that even terrifies you to a certain extent, encased within anguish and longing.
You wonder if it’s the same look he had been seeing in you the first day he met you.
***
You’re seated on Hoseok’s bed, watching him filter through his cabinet.
You’ve been here a handful of times, mostly nights where you weren’t able to sleep and he sat by your side until you did. Or moments where you would ponder about him, coming by to say good morning or wondering if he had eaten already.
However, you’ve never been here in the wake of the night, watching him open up his belongings with an unwavering gaze in his orbs.
He halts after a couple of seconds, treading slowly towards you before planting himself beside you on the bed.
Sharply inhaling, he hands you the photograph in his hands.
A young woman immediately flashes before your eyes, a kind upturn to her eyes and a warm smile on her lips. She appears to be within her late twenties, curly locks falling to her shoulders and dressed in a bright orange dress.
Even through the lack of light, you don’t fail to miss the ring that sits on the third finger of her left hand.
“Jung Euna.” Hoseok somberly confirms, “My deceased wife.”
Your eyes widen instantly.
Aside from the first time you were alerted of her presence, Hoseok has never spoken about her. You had never questioned him either, knowing better than anybody else the sheer grief that came with losing your sprouse.
And in a way, a part of you always knew, being painfully aware of it since the moment you’ve met the man.
His warm smile has always seemed to carry the weight of the world.
“She was really pretty.” You add with a smile, peering up to see tenderness in Hoseok’s expression.
“She was.” He hums, “I had actually liked her since high school, but I was always too nervous around her to confess my feelings.”
You nod, and he continues. “But then one day, I was working at a department store and she walked in. Recognized me within seconds.”
“–I knew I couldn’t let the chance slip away from me again, so I asked her out. To my surprise, she agreed right away, as if she had been waiting for me to ask.”
He beams, “She was stubborn, but very loving. Not a day goes by without me thinking about her.”
Your brows lift, wondering if this is how you sounded when you talked about Namjoon. If you held so much love in your eyes, so much nostalgia in every word you spoke, so much sparks of joy in your expression.
“We…we never had kids.” He brings up, as if he knew what you were wondering. “Rather…we couldn’t have kids.”
Shock crosses your features and Hoseok grimly smiles, “Euna…she had a miscarriage. And then we found out she couldn’t have kids anymore, and it was devastating.” He sighs, recalling the memory like it was yesterday, “We fought, a lot. She kept telling me to divorce her, or to find someone else, because she knew how much I wanted to be a dad and have kids of my own.”
“But you see, I’m just as stubborn as my wife. I told her I wasn’t going anywhere and that it didn’t matter at the end of the day. That I didn’t vow to be with her in sickness and health at the altar for no reason, and that my desire to be with her was stronger than she thought.”
“Euna cried a lot. She would always cry in moments like this, not realizing how clear it was that she was suffering. So, I stayed with her and we were together for years, until her death.”
You let out the breath you hadn’t known you had been holding, “C-Can I ask….”
A small smile curls on his lips. “Of course you can.”
You dart your gaze at the photo, knowing this isn’t easy to talk about. “Euna…how did she…?”
Hoseok harshly swallows, all his wounds reopening before him. “She got diagnosed with stomach cancer. We luckily caught it right away, but Euna…she got sick, very quickly. It soon turned into going back and forth into the hospital, getting treatments and scheduling surgeries, and she got better. She looked so healthy, even started smiling again and–”
Hoseok shudders, raising a hand against his eyes. You shift closer, wrapping an arm around him as his body trembles, sobs escaping him.
“Hoseok…” You whisper and he glances up, agony pouring out from him.
“S-She was better, Y/N.” He chokes out. “I thought it was all real. I thought I could take her out of there, bring her back home and everything would snap back into place again, but then it s-spread…”
You hug him tighter, squeezing your eyes shut.
“She was gone...” You complete, “…in the blink of an eye, like she never existed to begin with.”
Hoseok doesn’t respond, still within your arms and he knows he doesn’t need to. Not when you understand his pain so well, not when his feelings mimic yours, not when the gap in his heart that his wife left is so similar to your own, feelings of loneliness dispersing everywhere.
That night, you lie down next to Hoseok.
Your head rests against his chest as his breaths even out, his hand clasped onto yours. The tears have long dried but the anguish is still there, a deep furrow to his brows as he sleeps.
Peering upward, a soft smile lingers on your lips at the photograph he holds close to his heart.
You lean down, handing Hoseok a warm cup of tea.
His hands reach out in an instant, a kind smile on his features.
“Thank you.” You return it, before sitting yourself down on a chair opposite to him with your own cup.
It had been roughly a week since that night, and Hoseok looks brighter, almost more optimistic, if it were even possible. You weren’t sure after the second night passed, his eyes remaining swollen and a somber aura surrounding the man. You hadn’t left him alone for a split second, even as he continuously insisted he was alright, accompanying him on morning walks and holding onto his cold hand.
Hoseok had chuckled when you pushed him over, sliding into the opposite end of the bed and draping an arm around him. He smiles gently when you rest your head against his chest, listening to his slow heartbeat. His eyes turn tender when you dreamingly question about Euna, curious about her likes and dislikes, the way she spoke or the way she laughed, using him as your source to an individual you’ve never met, but feel like you know everything about.
And he does the same for you, asking for you to show him a picture of Namjoon one day. You pluck onto an album you had kept safely stored away, one Hoseok already knew was yours from how tidy it was kept and it was always situated next to your books, the very ones Namjoon would read.
Hoseok sees everything. Pictures of you and Namjoon smiling, much younger and with so much excitement dwelling in your eyes. Photographs of a new ring settled on your finger, bursting with so much happiness. Photographs of you crying, holding your nearly born son in your arms.
Hoseok sees your entire lifetime before his eyes, peeking at a question that has your eyes sparkling.
“Do you think we could have met?” He glances at the photograph of you in dark robes, a wide grin on your lips as you hold your college degree. “Like bumped shoulders at one point?”
“I don’t know.” You truthfully confess. You had lived such different lives, never once bumping into the man. It makes you wonder if you would have ever met him, having not gone to the old age home.
“We’re what? Five years apart?” He marvels, deep in thought, “What if you were revisiting college? And you just happened to stumble into me, freshly into college?”
You fondly smile at the sentiment. You can imagine it so clearly – a younger Hoseok, appearing curious with his surroundings as he glanced around, attempting to locate his classes. You, a couple years older, coming back to meet with one of your professors.
“You would be lost.” You state, playing into his fantasy. “I bet you would try to ask everyone around you for directions…”
“–until I encountered you, your confidence taking me away.”
You laugh, smile stretching. “I would wonder why you would be asking someone like me–”
“Someone who would be too stubborn to say no.” He grins and the image flashes before you can help it.
“E-Excuse me?” The man mumbles, appearing to be in his early twenties. “I’m supposed to go to the Art building, but I’m not sure which way that is.”
You turn in surprise, not having expected to be approached. In fact, your gaze was concentrated forward, attached to the office before you.
“O-Oh.” You’re caught off guard. His eyes are flickering everywhere and you muse he could really use the help. “Of course, it’s the black building just down on the right.”
“Thanks.” He kindly smiles, and turns in the direction of your instructions.
You widely grin, “It wouldn’t have been anything big. Just a couple of words exchanged.”
Hoseok halts, swiveling with wide eyes.
“Sorry, did you say something?” He ponders, and you softly shake your head.
“Don’t worry about it.” You mutter, “I do hope you find your class, Hoseok.”
He nods, peering at you in confusion. You watch as he departs, whispering underneath your breath.
“See you in a couple of years.”
Hoseok is leaning back in his chair, a soft smile on his lips.
“A tad unrealistic?” You were amused that he let you stray so far off, not halting the train of thoughts coming to you.
“A bit,” He chuckles, “but I didn’t want you to stop.”
You share a knowing look, holding onto your tea cups.
A soft knock resonates against the door.
Hoseok gets up first, gesturing for you to continue drinking your tea. You watch as he slowly pads over to the door, revealing a woman standing with a young girl before your eyes.
You recognize them immediately as a family that lived nearby, noticing them frequenting one of the homes during the summer.
The young girl looks to be roughly seven to eight years old, eyes flickering around and hands fidgeting. At the sight of her mother eyeing her, she speaks up.
“Um…m-my ball. It went into your garden.”
Hoseok softly smiles, leaning down to gently pat her head.
“Let’s go retrieve it, shall we?” He implores, and the little girl follows behind, slowing her pace to keep up with his steps.
You walk outside to the garden, standing next to her mother. Fondness spreads through you as Hoseok looks around with the girl, a tenderness to his eyes that has you smiling as he gives the ball back to you.
Her mother draws your attention. “I’m so sorry about this, I didn’t think it would end up here.”
“It’s quite alright.” You reassure, “Hoseok doesn’t mind either.”
“I’ve seen you around a couple of times.” She inquires, “Did you come here recently?”
You nod, “I wanted to move away from the city.”
She hums understandably, “That’s nice. Both you and your husband seem very loving.”
Your eyes flicker. It had been so long since you had heard such a statement, long having buried it with Namjoon when he passed.
“He’s not my husband…” You correct, and the woman’s eyes widen, like she hasn’t been expecting that response from you.
You pursue your lips. You truthfully, never had an answer. Not when Naree had accused you of replacing Namjoon, not when you would encounter the other neighbors and they would inquire about you, not when there was no envy on either one of your parts when Namjoon or Euna were mentioned, just understanding of the deep love you both still hold onto to.
Namjoon is your husband. He will always be, keeping a special place in your heart that no one else can ever fully take or replace.
Hoseok is your radiant sun.
His smile is comforting. His arms are warm. His presence feels so reassuring and makes you feel less lonely in this world that only has you left behind.
He's your solace – the embodiment of your pain and understanding at the same time.
“Hoseok…” You whisper, “He’s…he’s my partner.”
Through the thick and thin, through the laughs and the tears, through the comforting embraces and the anguished recollections. You are glad to have met him, to have experienced these new memories with him, and to have created a new path, one in which you will spend the rest of your life in together.
Hoseok glances up with a grin, the little girl holding her ball and giggling at something he said. His eyes lock on yours and it’s almost like he knows, he knows what is dwelling inside them.
He’ll always be your partner for eternity.
Time is the most valuable thing to exist in the world.
It can be a matter of a mere seconds, spinning away like loose strands without any control. It could be a matter of a few years, spanning across months at a subdued pace.
Time is so very valuable, and you’re grateful to have spent it with Jung Hoseok.
“Hoseok….”
It’s your voice, weakly calling out to him. He’s by your side within a matter of seconds.
“Y/N.” He whispers, a smile spanning on his lips with many lines creasing.
He’s gotten much older, the dark strands of hair turning completely gray, a deep hunch caving in his back more. He wears hearing aids on both ears, enough to still hear your low murmurs from your bed. His eyes have gotten weaker, a pair of glasses resting on the bridge of his long nose.
He still looks like the man you’ve spent so many years with.
And what years they were. You had basked in each other’s presence, being so utterly peaceful with him staying by your side. You weren’t lonely, you weren’t numb, you weren’t terrified anymore, you were simply content.
Even when your legs had started losing their ability. Even when your memory began to fade, panic settling in on not being able to recall anymore. Even when your skin paled with time and you had become bed ridden.
Hoseok held onto you. Hoseok reminded you, pulling out albums for you to see. Hoseok lied down with you, letting you rest your head against his chest. He coaxes and consoles you, keeping you in one piece even though the years were threatening to crumble you.
Even as he watches your chest slowly heave, voice growing weaker by the minute.
“Hoseok…” You croak. He’s leaning in right away, despite having machinery that allows him to hear. “T-Thank you…Hoseok….”
He chuckles, eyes glossed over. So many years had passed and you still had the need to express your gratitude
“I should be thanking you.” He brings up, “Thank you, Kim Y/N. For all these beautiful years.” He whispers, as if singing you a comforting lullaby “For letting me into your life and staying by your side.”
His voice cracks, but he still smiles.
“F-For letting this old man be your partner, for the rest of the time you had left.”
You slowly smile, and he squeezes your hand, like he knows you feel the same way.
“Hoseok….” You heave out, “I-I’m…I’m a little scared…”
“I’m here, Y/N. I’m here.” He whispers, leaning his forehead against yours and shaking in your grasp.
“I-I wanted to go….” You croak, “For so long….I-I wanted to see him….”
A low chuckle escapes you, “But not anymore.... strange, isn’t it….?”
Hoseok is sobbing, shudders escaping through his body. His hand is clasped around yours, eyes filled with water
But he keeps them open, wanting to encapsulate your last image into them.
“You’ll be okay.” He chokes out.
A warm smile graces your lips. It’s the most content he’s ever seen you, and it makes the center of his chest ache infinitely.
A moment of silence passes as Hoseok recollects himself, leaning back to gaze at you.
He calls out for you.
“Y/N?”
Your lips barely move, the shallow breaths leaving you all too soon. But you keep your gaze concentrated on him, letting him know you are still listening.
A tear manages to slip from Hoseok’s eyes, but he still smiles, like he always does.
“Say hi to your husband for me.” He whispers.
It’s the last thing you hear before a brightness filling your eyes, his hold on you being the strongest it’s ever been. It rushes in, pulling you away like a tide.
Your hand slips through his hold, and your eyes shut forever.
#hoseok fanfic#hoseok angst#bts hoseok fanfic#jhope fanfic#bts jhope fanfic#bts jhope angst#jhope angst#hoseok older couple au#bts elderly au#hoseok elderly au#bts older couple au#bts jung hoseok#jung hoseok#bts fanfic#bts angst#bts imagines#bts scenarios#hoseok x reader
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Name: Hyung, Sleep with Me
Ship: Hopekook (Hoseok/Jungkook) - BTS
Rating: Explicit
Category: M/M
Wordcount: 3,487k
Type: One Shot
Tags: smut, fluff, sexual tension, scents & smells, handjobs, nipple play, spooning, intercrural sex, soft, dirty talk, cute, canon-compliant
Summary:
Hoseok and Jungkook sleep in the same bed a lot but Jungkook has been wanting more (and so has Hobi).
#ao3 tags#ao3fic#ao3 fanfic#ao3#bts ao3#hopekook#hopekook fanfic#hopekook fic#bts hobi fanfic#bts#bts fanfic#bts fic#bts hobi#bts hoseok#bts hoseok fanfic#bts j hope#bts jeongguk#bts jhope#bts jhope fanfic#bts jungkook#bts jungkook fanfic#bangtan#jungkook#jhope#j hope#hobi#hoseok#hoseok fanfic#jung hoseok#jhope fic
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Favorites Fic Recs 5
Thank you to all the amazing writers <3
Kim Seokjin
Broken happy ever after (@taexual)
Of bears and bonds (@yoonia)
Switched (@i-am-baechu)
Scale (@shina913)
Kyoho (@jeonqkooks)
End of the line (@kookslastbutton)
Min Yoongi
Only for you (@beautifulfuckup99)
Fix you (@casuallyimagining)
The one that I adore (@gimmethatagustd)
Man of the year (@raplinesmoon)
Wishes (@i-am-baechu)
Set me free (@casuallyimagining)
Jung Hoseok
Flower (@readyplayerhobi)
Dinner plans cancelled (@souryoong)
Close call (@xjoonchildx)
Bloom (@7deadlysinsfics)
Kim Namjoon
My girl (@beautifulfuckup99)
Like couples do (@jinkookspencil)
Face sitting (@euphoricfilter)
B.S standards (@katnisspeetaprim)
Pregnancy insecurity (@katnisspeetaprim) NAMJOON
Park Jimin
Love Bug (@httpjeon)
Photograph (@i-am-baechu)
Wanna watch a sex tape (@gimmethatagustd)
Into you (@phenomenalgirl9)
Kim Taehyung
Still waters run deep (@btsmosphere)
Something blue (@moni-logues)
A human touch (@snackhobi)
Let love be enough (@jingabitch)
My tears ricochet (@augustbutwinter)
Goodbye (@jjksblackgf)
Wanna watch a sex tape (@gimmethatagustd)
That Irish barista (@i-am-baechu)
Race to your heart (@jjkeverlast)
Loverboy (@kookslastbutton)
Jeon Jungkook
Do it right (@rerefundslocals)
Gold is dull (@kookluvre) -> (hasn't been updated in awhile but def worth the read)
Best friends (@trivia-yandere)
Need you (@archivedkookie)
Across a crowded room (@monimonimoon)
A little reminder (@beautifulfuckup99)
University superstar (@jungkookstatts)
But we loved too young (@jl-micasea-fics)
Skirt chasers (@1kook)
Big enough for both of us (@btsmosphere)
Bodywork (@angeljeonjk97)
Deep in the woods (@angllicjk)
Angel in the marble (@venusjeon)
Was it better (@gyukookswhore)
97 (@rrjkive)
Lemon sherbet (@extravaguk)
The m-word (@hansolmates)
Head over skates (@mercurygguk)
Gun (@kooeater)
Café o lay (@taesspark)
Guilty pleasures (@kookslastbutton)
Purple car (@fruitmins)
Until my last breath (@iamjungkooked)
Don't want your sympathy (@sketchguk)
Couples shoot (@katnisspeetaprim)
What we need (@jungkookstatts)
Praising (@neo-percs)
Show you what devotion is (@euaphoric)
Pluto (@katnisspeetaprim)
Cherry candy (@bonny-kookoo)
OT7
Before I leave you (@hollyhomburg)
#bts namjoon#bts x reader#fanfic#fanfic rec#bts fanfic#writing#bts taehyung#bts jhope#bts#bts jungkook#bts jimin#seokjin#jimin#taehyung#namjoon#bangtan#bts army#min yoongi#bts jung hoseok
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Fall Back in Love | jjk
> jungkook somehow grew a reputation of sleeping around on campus, leaving him lonely and inexperienced with relationships. so when you, his old childhood best friend moves onto campus, he discovers what a relationship can feel like as he finds himself falling in love with you
> jungkook x f.reader, childhood best friends,friends to lovers, slow burn, light smut, jealous! jungkook, needy!jungkook, mature, mentions of blood and fighting
Fall Back in Love drabble
wc: 17.6k (got carried away)
“why would we go on a date?” jungkook fought the frown that wanted to appear on his face. not again. this had to be the at least the third time this month he’s had the exact same conversation the morning after he slept with a woman he either got chatting to at a party or a local club. it was like every woman within a five mile radius had a meeting and collectively decided to sleep with him then never see him again afterwards. he didn’t want to seem pathetic, isn’t that exactly what the majority of guys his age wanted? in their eyes he had the perfect situation going on, constant sex when he wanted it with no strings attached. what he wanted to know however was how they dealt with the constant loneliness that occurred every time the hook up left? or the heartache that came when he saw a college couple walking around campus throwing their love in his face every morning at 8am? he tried not to be bitter, it was cute they found someone to spend their college years with. no he was bitter, so very bitter. he was a romantic at heart, so how did he get such a reputation that meant no woman ever wanted to even go on one date?
oh he knew how, it was that stupid frat party at the beginning of the year when he started his course. the first week of college was basically back to back drinking, parties and nights out. if you remembered it you didn’t do it right, as most people would say. he knew no one, none of his friends were in his year they had already done this prior to him and were doing other things as they were older and deep into their courses. they encouraged him though, saying he needed to make friends in his own year to make his life easier. so when he overheard of this party some guys on the swim team were having, he decided to go along. well, after a lot of convincing from his older friends because he certainly didn’t want to go. but he built up the courage and found himself stuck right in the middle of the action and after a lot of alcohol, he actually found himself having a good time. he found one friend at least, taeyong, who turned out to be his roommate. he stuck by him for most of the night and when he introduced him to this girl- the night took a turn. it was very evident what she wanted, a one night stand, and jungkook wasn’t about to turn her down not after the nice amount of alcohol in his system. now that wasn’t the problem at all, it was the fact she went around afterwards saying he was definitely a player because of how he acted in bed. she made sure that everyone knew that he was good in bed but for some reason she decided to add in a small little detail. that he had never been in a relationship, and he didn’t want one. where she picked this up from? he had no idea, he did say in small talk he never had a relationship but he did not recall insinuating he didn’t ever want one. so now he’s been totally screwed the entire year, and here he was once again the morning after the end of year semester party this time- getting turned down
“right, why would we? just asked to, be polite” the woman chuckles as she changes, jungkook watches his own hands play with each other as she does so. he didn’t want this reputation, no one was taking him seriously. although he didn’t necessarily want to date this girl, he still thought it would be nice to go out and have a civilised conversation for once without loud ass music pumping through his ears and drunk people running around him.
“okay well, see ya” and with that she was out of his dorm and he was alone, huffing he flops back and his head hits his pillows. as he led there staring at his ceiling he came to a conclusion, he was done with this, with the one night stands. he felt so pathetic, at first it started off as some fun but then it turned into just bringing someone back so he had someone to cuddle to sleep - how sad. the sadess part was that sometimes they didnt even stay the night, so occasionally he would end up alone anyway. but now he couldnt do it anymore, he felt used and even more alone then when this all started.
“here he is, the man of the hour”
“taeyong, iam not in the mood” he wasnt even scared of the man bursting into his room anymore, not even a flinch, this happened more often then he would like, he appreciated the guy but boy did he have zero boundaries.
“dont be so glum, just saw that girl leave. have fun last night did we?” jungkook glared at him as he plonked himself at the end of his bed, he didnt need anymore reminders of the embarrassment he just endured and he doesnt want to engage anymore in the idea that he was nothing more then a good night to these women. especially with the fact that most people did not think much of him growing up, particularly when it came to his feelings. as a kid he was known as ‘the one thats good a sport’ for most of school, everyone just assumed that he was this happy go lucky boy that liked sports and had no deeper thoughts running through his head. no teacher ever asked him in class what he thought of the book they all had to read over the summer, never did classmates ask him for the help with the homework- even though he usually did well on assignments. no they just turned to him for a good laugh. which was fine, he didnt mind because back then he had you. jungkook remembers you so fondly, when he was at the back of the classroom with his hand held shyly in the air when the teacher asked if anyone hand any opinions. of course, he would never get chosen but as the person who did was answering you’d lean over to him and whisper to ask what he wanted to say and that he would say it to you. he also thought about when you would be struggling on a question and turn to him right away to ask him if he could help you, even when the guy at the top of the class was right there on the other side of you. honestly, jungkook felt so valued when you were in his life, you seemed to really care about his opinions, thoughts and feelings. when everyone turned a blind eye to him one day in school because his pet had passed away, not wanting to talk to the school joker because he was miserable, you came right up to him. you asked what was wrong, gave him a hug and told him everything was going to be alright. but he didnt have you anymore, you flew off somewhere right before the end of school and he lost contact. sure, he met his six new best friends shortly after but it didnt make it easier. in fact, nothing about his life was easy at the moment.
“i had the furthest thing from fun” jungkook replied, in monotone making taeyong rasie an eyebrow at him. deep down he knew why his friend was down, taeyong had saw this happening from the very start. he always tried to laugh it off, make jungkook see some sort of funny side but there wasnt any side that he found laughable.
“if only that fucking girl at the start of the year didnt open her mouth” he sighs before he takes a little look at his friend sat on his bed “you’re such a big softie”
it was summer now, the sun big and bright in the sky as everyone on campus began talking about the array of summer parties that were already being organised. jungkook made a deal with himself that he would not bet attending a single one of those parties, he hated them anyway he didnt know why he always went to them
“just go to them, dont be boring” oh yeah thats why. he glares over to his friend jimin as they sit on the campus yard - their five other friends right there with them
“i see why he doesnt want to” yoongi mutters, making jungkook happy one of them was finally agreeing with him “they get boring after a while, they play the same music and bring the same alcohol every damn time.” jungkook definitely agreed here, of course the main reason was to avoid hookups and every woman looking at him as if he wasn’t a fully functional human that had feelings but he wasnt going to tell them that.
“we just dont want him to be alone, none of us are in the same year as him. he needs friends that he can see more often” it annoyed jungkook that namjoon had a point, but no amount of debating was going to make him go to anymore parties
“i have taeyong, ill be fine. plus i see you guys enough, more then enough if you ask me” he was about to laugh at his own joke before taehyung threw his jacket directly at his head.
“you’re the one begging for us to hang out with you all the time, dont get cocky” the group shares a laugh as jungkook huff and rips the jacket from his head. taehyung was of course correct though, jungkook was always asking the whole group to hang out together which these days hardly ever happened. with all of them busy doing their own thing, it left not much time for them to hang out just the seven of them. if he were really honest with himself he’d say he was jealous, because they all made their own friends that were in the same year as them whereas jungkook only had taeyong. he didn’t even have taeyong that often, he was social butterfly and was always of doing something that he end up telling jungkook about at the end of the day. so not only did no women want to spend time with him outside of having sex, his friends also had better things to be doing as well - college life couldn’t get any better.
“i wouldn’t have to beg if you guys actually wanted to spend time with me anymore” jungkook whined as he threw tae’s jacket back at him. the other boys looked hesitantly at each other, there was no doubt they loved jungkook and wanted to spend all the time they could with him. but they had separate life’s, some had girlfriends which paired with college work didn’t leave much time as it was.
“of course we do, we just have other stuff on too” hoseok tries to be as soft about the topic as possible, not wanting to imply jungkook was less important then their other priorities. the youngest knew that the guys wanted to hang out but had other reasons meaning they couldn’t as often as he’d like, if only he tired harder at the beginning of the year to make other friends
“join a club or something, meet new people” jin suggests and the whole group nods their heads in agreement while jungkook sat glumly, he couldn’t think of anything worse then joining one of the clubs. not that he had anything against the people that attended, but nothing interested him. he wasn’t into sport anymore and he took no fascination in anything else available. he used to be a passionate guy, he enjoyed playing football, reading and painting but now he just- was bored at the thought. in fact, he stopped doing all that when you had left probably because you did all of those things with him. you always came to watch him play, sat on the benches wearing his number top shouting his name loudly. you encouraged him to read different books that he might like and sat at the end of his bed while you both read quietly. and of course you got him into painting, brining two big canvases to his house one day with brushes and paint telling him to get his ass outside so you could paint together. he had so much fun when he was a kid with you, never was a day boring because you made it enjoyable. now he didn’t do any of it anymore, there was no one to encourage him to do so nor do it with him.
“would rather show a pinecone up my ass than join a club” jimin snorts at this making jin smack him over the head for encouraging jungkooks attitude. they hated to see their youngest friend so lonely, especially during his college years. they were supposed to be some of the best in his life but he’s spent most of it getting turned down by women who just want to sleep with him and making zero friends.
“oh new subject, new girl just started she’s in your year jungkook” hoseok says and jungkook was far from interested in this, why would he care that someone new was joining? “and i set you up on a blind date” now he was interested, no he was confused and panicked
“what? why would you do that? i don’t want to go on a blind date! are you crazy?!”
“i believe what you were meant to say was ‘thank you’” hoseok replies as his friends freak out. honestly he was tired of jungkook complaining about the way women on campus viewed him without doing anything about it. he thought jungkook should’ve shut down those rumours about him not wanting to date and just stop sleep around as soon as they circulated if it bothered him that much. but of course he didn’t.
“hoseok, i can’t believe you set me up and why did you leave it this late into the meet up to tell me?!” his older friends shrugged his shoulders
“forgot” jungkook appeared flabbergasted at his friends brazen attitude to setting him up on a date without even asking him first
“do you even know her name?!”
“nope” the younger groaned as all his friends laughed, truly he wanted to get out of this blind date but without as much as a name how the hell was he supposed to do that? he was sure hoseok wasn’t going to cancel it for him. “all i know is, you’re meeting her outside the music building tomorrow. be there for 6pm sharp”
“tomorrow?! and you’re telling me now?”
“at least i didn’t wait until tomorrow to say. stop being a baby it’s just a date” jungkook stayed quiet after this, already getting nervous for whoever hoseok had set him up with.
it was party time once again later that night, jungkook stuck to his word and decided to stay home rather then attend it. he was sick of the cycle, girl comes up to him- sleeps with him then leaves after and doesn’t want anything else to do with him. it bored him now. so, while everyone else got drunk and had a good time, he was sat at his desk working on a paper that was due no where near soon. his phone buzzed on the table, distracting him from his typing.
jimin 😈 you boring fucker, get your ass to this party 23:46
would rather stick a fork up in my eye goodnight 23:47
once he replied he but his phone back down and leaned back in his chair, honestly he felt like he was missing out. all his friends were there, not just people from his year, so it was possible he’d actually have fun at this party. he just wanted to stick to his plan to avoid that scene, although right now he could’ve really used a drink. with a groan he shut his laptop and began to get ready to head out, already knowing where the party was being held. maybe after this he wouldn’t attend anymore? in a prompt hour he was dressed nicely and in the middle of a big crowd with loud music pumping through his body. the mixed vodka drink in his hand already half finished as he talked with taeyong, well tried to with the music.
“there’s a girl totally staring at you right now” jungkook rolled his eyes, not even bothering to turn around and see who he was talking about. he may have broke the promise to himself to not come out tonight, but he for sure was not going to hook up with anyone. he was done with the embarrassment of being hit and quit, no longer wanting to experience the awkwardness after doing the deed
“good for her, iam going to refill my drink” pushing past everyone as quickly as he could, he entered the busy kitchen to mix together a stronger drink then before.
“oh i thought you would rather shove eating utensils in your eye then be here?” a voice calls from behind him and he chuckles as jimin is stood there, red solo cup in hand.
“well i knew you lot might miss me so decided to ease the pain” his friend rolls his eyes as he sets his drink on the counter
“please, don’t flatter yourself” just as quick as he arrived, jimin was about to leave after someone called his name from a direction jungkook couldn’t quite see. but before he did go, he added “there’s totally a girl staring into your soul right now” again, jungkook didn’t react and didn’t look to see who it was. just nodded to indicate he heard jimin before his friends turned around a left. sighing, he took sip out of his now refilled cup and winced at just how strong he made it. his plan to only come out to hang out with his usual friends went south when he realised they were all drunk and separated out doing their own thing, so he was left standing around on his own like usual.
“here he is” jungkook turned to see taeyong with a girl beside him in a short dress with long hair “you can finally stop asking for him” realising that the girl beside his roommate was brought over for him he rolled his eyes
“so this is the one night stud everyone’s been going on about” he had to suppress a scoff at her words, of course she came over for that reason. that stupid girl from the start of the year really ruined his reputation. “so do you wanna get out of here?”
“no, thanks iam good” the stranger seemed surprised at his words, expecting an opposite answer “taeyong iam leaving” with that jungkook abandons the idea of actually having a good night and decides he’d rather just go back home.
“come on man, it might make you feel better” jungkook stops at the door as taeyong chased after him
“what another one night stand? iam done with the pointless sex, they don’t even engage in small talk anymore, don’t even want to know a single thing about me. iam finished with feeling used, goodbye” with that he left and was certain that this would be the last time he was going to a dorm party.
it was the next day which meant it was time for the dreaded blind date, jungkook had no energy for it. ever since he woke up he was in a foul mood, all his friends were hungover and not answering his texts and he missed an important lecture because he got his schedules mixed up. if he knew who this date was he would be cancelling, but he didn’t and the only other option was to stand them up. he knew he would just feel bad for making the person wait around for him, so at 5pm he begrudgingly began to get ready. he had no idea what the plan even was for this date so he kept it casual; jeans, white shirt and a denim jacket. checking the time it was almost 6pm so he quickly but on some shoes, gathered his keys and wallet and headed off to the music department. he was not looking forward to having to meet up with a complete stranger who’s probably already heard about his ‘reputation’, in all honesty he believed this girl most likely agreed to this date because she wanted to sleep with him. and that wasn’t even because of his ego, it’s literally all any girl propositions when they meet him- he didn’t even think he was that good in bed so why did they all want to? shaking all the thoughts from his head, he stalks to the music department. the campus was pretty empty at this time but a few people were still walking around, at this point he didn’t know whether he wanted to be stood up by this mystery woman. sure it would be embarrassing but at least he would have to go. but that scenario was ditched when he came close to the department and saw the back of girl, looking at the floor clearly waiting for someone. sighing he walks over, lightly tapping the girl on the shoulder. he kept a fake smile on his face, it wasn’t this strangers fault he was in a foul mood. once the girl did turn though, his mouth dropped open in surprise.
“jungkook?” you say in shock, it was him. your childhood best friend was the person you were forcibly set up with tonight. having pretty much just arrived at the campus you wanted to settle in, but after a guy your new roommates knew said he had the perfect person for you to go on a date with, you were pretty much pushed to go through it. you recognised him easily now, however at a party you attended you could’ve sworn you saw him. but in the dim light and pushy crowd, it was hard to tell. you looked at him for so long, trying to follow him around to get a good look but he left before you could go up to him and you felt creepy enough following a possible stranger around you weren’t about to chase after him. now, he was here standing in front of you dressed up to go on a blind date.
“y/n? i can’t believe-” suddenly you two let out synchronised screams as you wrapped your arms around each other, jumping in circles as you hugged one other. a few people stared over at the commotion but neither of you noticed, or cared. jungkook couldn’t fathom the fact his night went from being utterly in a mood to reuniting with one of the best friends he’s ever had. seeing you again made his heart pick up in pace, he finally felt happy again after such a shit first year at college. after finally letting go of each other, both of you couldn’t help the smiles that were planted on your lips.
“out of all the people to be set up with, i get stuck with you” jungkook let out a gasp as he pushes you playfully
“you should think of yourself as lucky” you chuckle at his words before a comfortable silence grows. the pair of you can’t help but just look at each other as your minds comprehend the coincidence.
“well, i guess we should start the date” you break the silence and jungkook nods in agreement. “hey why don’t we go to an arcade, like old times?” when you were kids you two would always go to an arcade on the weekends. at first it was a one off, but slowly it became a weekly thing. the mention of it made jungkook smile even bigger then before
“i’ll show you to a great one, and on the way you need to tell me everything. like what are doing here? how was life abroad? how’s your parents? what are you majoring in?” you laugh as jungkook begins to walk and ask multiple questions. you follow beside him, also thinking of a few questions yourself.
“my parents came back for work, they said i could continue my studies abroad but i wanted to come back. life away was fun but not as good as here, my parents are good and iam doing english literature” you answer his questions and he nods as the pair of you walk side by side, it was still amazing to you that you were right beside him again. you thought about him all the time, you were closer to no one in your life then you were to him. “how have you been? still taking the sports world by storm?” jungkook’s smile faltered a little, forgetting that he was very much into sports the last time you knew him
“no i uh- stopped playing after school” you were surprised at this, there wasn’t many sports he didn’t play in school and he was good at all of them. you were about to ask why when he suddenly pulls you to his other side on the pavement, a cyclist suddenly speeding past. you put a hand over your heart, it suddenly beating faster - which you put down to almost being knocked over not by jungkook pulling you. the pair of you continue walking and you get to ask your question
“why did you stop?” jungkook sighed at the question, not wanting to admit that once you left he slowly gave up on most things. you were the only one to encourage him to continue after all
“i just lost interest” he shrugged the question off but you frowned, you remembered how happy he was every time you watched him play anything. the way he be so excited whenever his team won, why would he lose interest in that. “here’s the arcade, let’s go in” you didn’t realise how lost in thought you were until you looked up at his words and saw the flashing lights from outside the window. following him inside you looked around at all the games, memories of all those weekends together as kids came to mind as you did so.
“dance revolution is first we know this” you declare making jungkook laugh and follow you to the dancing machine in the corner of the place. it was like you were never apart, so comfortable with each other. he vividly remembers how obsessed you were with the stupid dance game, having to go on it as soon as you walked through the doors each week. he joins you on the platform as you slot in a coin a begin to search through the random songs on the program. you seem to be looking at one for an awfully long time making jungkook give you a side eye
“that says extremely hard, no chance keep looking” smirking you select confirm and jungkook groans at your defiance. “really?”
“come on it’ll be funny” you justify as the song loads up and immediately you see a bunch of arrows filling the screen, making you regret your choice a little. the stomping on the floor is loud as you and jungkook try and hit every arrow to the fast paced song. you can’t help but laugh at how ridiculous the pair of you must look, jumping around to try not miss a beat. your breathing gets harder as your legs move rapidly, looking over to his side you see that jungkook is beating you. “how the fuck are you doing this?” you shout out, noticing he’s hardly missed an arrow, his score much higher then yours
“iam just too good at everything, what can i do?” he breaths out, before hitting a combo that you ultimately miss at the same time. sighing in relief when the song comes to an end the two of you rest your hands on your knees as you bend over to catch your breath. a big loser sign appears on your side of the screen while jungkooks side displays a green winner.
“unbelievable” you don’t think you’ve ever beaten jungkook at this game, you thought maybe after all this time you had a chance but still he came out victorious. the pair of you walk away from the machine, breathing back to normal as you look for your next game. the two of you spent the next hour and half playing around in the arcade, both feeling like kids all over again. you were happy you actually agreed to go on this blind date and jungkook definitely felt the same. each day of college made him want to drop out more and more, but like usually when he was at his lowest you came to the rescue to pick him back up again. waking out of the arcade together, laughing mindlessly, the pair of you take off back to campus together.
“iam happy you chose to come back, honestly- i haven’t been having a good time at college” you grow upset to hear this, you assumed jungkook would be enjoying his time well you hoped he was.
“you haven’t? jungkook what’s wrong?” your concern flattered him, you were always the caring type especially when it came to him. though he didn’t know if he really wanted to go into detail about what exactly was giving him problems.
“well it’s just, i’ve had this issue for while at the moment.” you stayed silent, hoping this would prompt him to continue talking. wrapping your arms around yourself as you did so “this is so embarrassing but at the start of the year i got with this girl, she assumed i explicitly wanted a one night stand so began telling her friends that. they then told their friends and so on, it’s gotten to the point where literally no girl on campus wants anything to do with me unless it’s sex” you nodded at his explanation, feeling awful for him knowing that ever since your were friends he seemed the romantic type. always going on about wanting to have a wife and kids as soon as possible, you thought it was weird when you were younger but as you grew up you just realised that his parents were so in love that he just wanted to be like them. “plus i have like no friends in my year” he finishes and you felt so sorry for him, he was such a good person when you were younger- he didn’t deserve to feel this low when it should be the best years of his life
“iam sorry to here that jungkook, but look those are just silly rumours. don’t let people who want something from you involved in your life, if they wanted to get to know you they would. and iam in your year now, if you ask nice enough, i might be your friend” he laughs at you, wondering how you always manage to make him smile so easily.
“always so wise y/n” he says as you two catch sight of the campus, it not being too far away. jungkook couldn’t help but feel a bit disappointed at having to leave you so soon after meeting you again.
“let’s exchange numbers and meet again soon, iam so glad we got to see each other again” smiling jungkook pulls his phone from his pocket and hands it over to you, watching happily as you punch your number in and give yourself a call. handing it back you give him a smile before continuing to walk onto campus, jungkook not far behind you before he’s by your side. one side of the campus contained the boys dorm and the other had the girls, you stopped in the middle of the yard to say goodbye but jungkook beat you
“let me walk you back. it’s dark” his sweetness made your heart melt, he was the same sweetheart as he always was
“i’ll be fine, thanks though. you get home safe, from what i hear girls here go crazy for one night with you”. they might jump you on your way back”jungkook groans at your teasing, you were still the same as you always was- sarcastic and playful. you laugh as you walk backwards, giving him a wave before finally turning around and walking away. he watches you walk off, sighing when you turn a corner and he could no longer see you.
the next morning jungkook had a bounce in his step as he walks over to meet his friends in the yard, only hoseok, jimin and taehyung were able to make it. the smile is bright on the youngest face as he seats on the grass, making his three friends look at him confused.
“why is your face doing that?” taehyung inquires making jungkook give him an odd look, but taehyung’s face remains serious
“doing what?”
“like, smiling and shit?” his friends are even more surprised when jungkook laughs, not exactly the type of reaction they normally get
“i can’t smile?” the three men look at each other before answering in sync
“no” jungkook rolls his eyes, but after spending the evening with you yesterday he was just in too good of a mood to get upset.
“so, blind date went well” hoseok asks, eyebrow raised as he was sure jungkook was adamant that he didn’t want to go
“actually yes. the girl you set me up with was actually y/n, remember the one i told you about?” his friends faces a shocked at the news, they were beginning to think you weren’t real with how often jungkook spoke about you
“no fucking way? the girl you talk about all the bloody time? that’s crazy” jimin adds to the conversation, jungkook’s smile growing bigger that the thought of you
“oh my god you’re so in love!” taehyung exclaims making jungkook widen his eyes, he loved you sure but it was definitely platonic- right?
“no no, she’s my childhood best friend. iam just glad she’s here” hoseok narrows his eyes at his friend, he knew for sure that no one could react like this over a friend. he wasn’t going to mention anything about it though, but he knew that with time jungkook would be coming right back to them saying he was in love - he would bet money on it
“jungkooks wife aside” the youngest was about to contest but jimin was already talking “namjoon says that he is hosting his very own party this weekend” the came as a surprise to the other boys, none of them had ever organised a dorm party. sure they were happy to go to party’s where they didn’t have to clean up the mess or worry about university employees busting them- but to host one was a completely different story
“why on earth would he want to do that?” taehyung inquires and jungkook is also wondering the same thing and was waiting for jimin to reply, but as soon as he starts speaking he can’t hear a word because he sees you walking past not too far from them. he zones out completely as he watches you walk around campus, thinking how strange it is to just casually see you again. without thinking, he’s on his feet jogging towards you before he lost sight of where you were going. his friends turn their heads to see where he was going, utterly confused as to why he was just practically running off.
“goodbye to you too jungkook” hoseok mutters making his friends laugh before they continue their own conversation. meanwhile jungkook just managed to catch up to you, tapping you on the shoulder making you stop in your tracks. you smile upon seeing him, happy that you could just run into at any time or see him whenever you wanted.
“did you run?” you ask with a laugh as you watch him pant a little to catch his breath
“oh no i just- jogged a little. you’re a fast walker” he gets out and you chuckle at him, waiting for him to compose himself before speaking “i just wanted to say hi, ask if you have any plans this weekend?”
“oh well apparently someone in third year is hosting a party, my roommate wants me to go with her” you explain and jungkook was more happy then he thought he would to hear you were going. but given the fact he promised he’d be going to no more party’s, that was surely out the window if you were going to be there
“that’s one my best friends! please go otherwise iam practically going to be stranded if i go, i always get ditched”
“don’t you worry, i’ll be there to keep you company” you assure and for some reason jungkook feels relief, with you back he felt like he could finally begin to enjoy college again now that he actually had a friend he could see often. “i have a lecture so i better be going but, if you’re free later we should hang out?” jungkook was nodding before actually answering with words
“yeah that’ll be great, i’ll text you” you give him a smile before one of your friends come up to you telling you to hurry up and walk to class with her
“see you jay” jungkook could’ve swore his heart leapt at the way you casually used your old nickname for him. he almost forgot about it up until now, now it felt like the smile would never leave his lips. walking back over to his friends, they stopped chatting to stare at him as he sat himself back down- smile even wider then before.
“if that’s what he looks like after one conversation with her can i have her?” jungkook’s smile disappears and he glares at taehyung for his comment making jimin and hoseok laugh
“that would be a no” hoseok chuckles but jungkook doesn’t look too impressed, he knew he didn’t like you that way- of course not. but over his dead body would he let any of his friends get with you, absolutely not. he loved his them sure, he knew none of them would hurt you, but you were his friend and friends were always off limits “how did you too become so close anyway?” hoseok was curious, ever since he became friends with jungkook he always mentioned this girl who was his best friend who he missed. they didn’t even know how you two became friends though despite the fact he always taked about her. at one point it began to annoy all the guys, because he just never shut up about you, any situation they were in he would always just have to say how he had done the same thing with you before or it reminded him of you somehow. but they could see how much you meant to him, so they just let him ramble on.
“we met when we were like, five. i was sad on this school trip because i dropped my ice cream, she gave me hers” jungkook laughed at the memory, he remembers how his mum said after that not a day went by where he wouldn’t talk about this girl who gave him ice cream. from then on their parents got close and always arranged play dates for the two of them and they stayed friends right until she had to leave.
“sounds like a romantic movie synopsis” jimin jokes and once again jungkook is left scowling, the couple jokes showed no sign of stopping with them and jungkook knew they would only continue now he’d be seeing you more often. suddenly, his phone buzzes making him pull it out of his hoodie pocket and looking at the message he smiles slightly
y/n 🌸: nice to see you today. wanna meet at 7 and get some dinner?
jungkook: great seeing you too. that sound great, outside the music department again?
y/n 🌸: perfect meet you there
after messaging he pops his phone back in his pocket and looks up to see his friends staring at him, he gives them a confused look
you were happily applying some finishing touches with your makeup as you got ready for dinner when you friend sits next to you on the floor in front of your mirror.
“excited for your date?” she says making you roll your eyes and screw you mascara back up
“not a date” you reply as you put away your make up and mess around with your hair, making sure it looked nice
“we’ll be careful with jungkook” giving her a side eye you wonder why on earth you’d have to be careful around jungkook. her comment annoyed you a little, he was your childhood best friend and after seeing him again he seemed to be exactly the same as he was when you were kids “he just likes to bang, doesn’t do relationships” now that didn’t sound like him at all, and you knew it wasn’t he had already told you about these silly rumours.
“and how would you know this, heard him say it?” you decided to quiz her, after accusing someone of that you should definitely have absolute proof of it. you remember how upset he seemed when telling you what the girls on campus thought of him.
“well no but-”
“exactly” you cut her off “ive known the boy since i was a kid, he’s honestly a nice guy. don’t believe everything you hear” y/f/n seemed a little surprised at this, it was a known thing around campus that jungkook was the type of guy to just want a one night stand. “right, iam going.” you say your goodbyes and head off to the meeting spot you agreed upon and walking up to it you noticed jungkook was already there and waiting. looking at the time on your phone, you saw it was still ten minutes until seven. turning around, he saw you walking over and smiled.
“here she is” you chuckle at this and give him a little hug as a greeting, how could anyone give you a warning about such a lovely guy?
“have you been waiting long?” that was something that hadn’t changed about him either, always early or on time.
“no, not long. where would you like to eat?” you think for a little but realised you couldn’t really think of anywhere, most places you used to go closed when you left.
“is that diner we used to go to all the time still open?” jungkook seemed to get excited at the mention of the place, remember how you two frequented that diner often after school.
“yes let’s go there” as jungkook began walking, you followed next to him thinking about what your roommate said. you didn’t know whether to bring it up, not wanting to upset him about this situation more then he was.
“you know, my roommate warned me about you earlier” his eyebrows raised a little in surprise at this but he ultimately knew exactly why she did that “i actually got a little annoyed with her, she seemed stumped when i asked her if she actually heard you say you only want one night stands.” the pair of you laughed at this and jungkook felt happy that you were in his corner to defend him. his other friends never came in contact with the people spreading rumours in your year and taeyong seemed to just confirm them to help his roommate get laid
“well that was nice of you but don’t feel the need to defend me, i don’t think those rumours will ever stop” your heart hurt at how sad he looked, it was a known fact that you had a soft spot for him and you probably always would. even the reason you became friends was because you felt upset looking at the crying boy who lost his ice cream.
“no that’s what friends do, especially when the rumours are fucking lies” he was a bit shocked to see you so worked up over it, but you’re a good person you always were so it didn’t surprise him that much.
“my saviour” jungkook jokes and it makes you giggle but deep down he was being honest, he didn’t think there was one time when he was in trouble where you didn’t come to the rescue. he dropped his ice cream? you gave him yours, no one listened to him in class? you listened, people ignored him when he was upset? you comforted him, he had no motivation? you gave it to him- and now people believed rumours about him and you were there defending him. jungkook felt relieved to have you in his life again. you two were still laughing together when you walked into the diner together and taking a seat by the window, exactly where you used to sit
“i can’t believe my eyes” the diner’s owner came straight up to the table, knowing exactly who just walked through door. he would never forget the faces of the two people who filled the place daily. “why do i never see you anymore?” the older man quizzes making the two of you laugh
“someone decided to move away from me” jungkook states, pointing an accusing finger at you, making you roll your eyes.
“well iam glad you’re back, will you be wanting the usual?” honestly you couldn’t believe the man even remembered you, let alone the old order the two of you used to get.
“jungkook, you want the usual?” he nods excitedly at your question and you smiled agreeing as the owner walks to the back to put your order in “how on earth does he remember what we used to get?”
“well seems as the usual order is a large pizza and a side of fries, it shouldn’t be hard to remember” jungkook says and you chuckle “but iam surprised he still remember us, surely we’ve changed a little”
“nah, you’re still a baby face” jungkook gives a fake scowl, narrowing his eyes at you
“i don’t have a baby face” you can’t help the smile that grows on your lips, looking at him pout as it did.
“it’s not a bad thing, you’re cute” jungkook felt his heart leap at the compliment and it took him by surprise, why the fuck was his heart rate picking up over a stupid comment? his mind was working overtime while you didn’t really seem to notice him having an internal freak out. “here comes the drinks, he even remembered that”
“one coke and one milkshake, enjoy kids” the owner himself bought the drinks out and placed them on the table. you thanked him before taking a sip and jungkook leans forward to use the straw sticking out of his milkshake, not trusting his now shaky hands to lift the glass.
“so, tell me about the new friends you’ve made” you ask, wondering who he’s been hanging out with since you left. clearing his throat, he tries to ignore the random nervousness.
“well, i met these six guys after you left. we’re pretty close and then i have my roommate but i don’t see him often”
“ooh seven friends, maybe you could set me up?” jungkook suddenly froze, caught off guard at your words. you on the other hand had a sour taste in your mouth as soon as you said it, something about the thought of being set up made you feel strange. “iam joking, don’t want to be set up” jungkook nodded, a little relieved but he had no idea why he was getting worked up over the thought of you dating. you were just a friend, what was the problem?
“don’t think any of them would be your type, they’d just get on your nerves” he decided to crack a joke, trying to steer the conversation away from setting you up. he noticed that the owner was bringing your food over and he was glad there was a distraction from whatever was going through his mind.
“enjoy your food, and you better be back again after this” the owner orders and the both of you laugh, saying that you will. immediately the two of you dig in, pulling a slice of pizza each.
“this feels like old times” you comment making jungkook smile, between going to the arcade and now the diner- it truly felt like he was a kid again.
“it really does, just reminds me of all the times we were here before”
“jungkook stop!” you yell as you run into the diner to stop your best friend from pulling of your school tie for the millionth time.
“the knot is so tight can you even undo it?” he laughs as he follows you into the diner, sitting down opposing you in a booth. you look down and begin tugging at your school tie, jungkook having pulled it down so much on the walk here that the knot had tightened up.
“you’re so annoying” you huff making him laugh harder before a worker comes over to the two of you, smiling at your antics
“good to see you kids back, let me guess a pizza and fries to share?” the waitress had seen you two come in often, she always worked the early afternoon shift which was perfect timing for when all the kids finished school.
“yes please also a banana milkshake and a coke” jungkook says with a smile and the waitress nods before waking off to prepare the order. “my mum invited you over for dinner this weekend” you excitedly cheered and clapped at this
“her food is so good, iam there”
“excuse me you’re meant to be happy to spend time with me not eat the food” jungkook says and you shrug your shoulders
“i spend too much time with you, the food is more exciting”
“you know my mum is very happy to hear you’re back” jungkook says, the pizza was eaten and plate pushed to the side now the fries rest in between you two as the pair of you eat them.
“is she? did you tell her i was back?” jungkook shakes his head, remembering the phone call he got from his mum the day before
“actually your mum told her, apparently they’ve already had a wine night” you laugh at this, you should’ve known your mum would get back in contact straight away. the pair of your mums might have been even closer then you and jungkook
“of course they have”
“she’s invited you round as soon as you’re free by the way, she’s very excited” jungkook watched you nod at his words as you munched on some fries, he felt his heart melting at the sight. ever since you came back he finally felt like he was having a good time like he was supposed to be at uni.
you barely had time to see jungkook after your dinner together, the work load under you was too big to be having any spare time. the next time you saw him it was the day of namjoon’s party and you found yourself looking for him a soon as you entered the dorm. however the crowd of people all bunched together made it extremely difficult so you stuck to your roommate and followed her to go get a drink.
“are you looking for him?” your roommates question took you by surprise, was it really that obvious?
“who?” deciding to play it dumb didn’t exactly work out as she laughed and shook her head at you, although you don’t know why you were pretending not to know who she was on about- was it really so bad to want to see your long lost childhood bestie?
“you know who”
on the other side of the dorm, jungkook was almost on the top of his toes as he searched around the mountains of bodies in front of him to try and find you making hoseok side eye him.
“oh my god hi y/n!” hoseok loudly saying your name makes jungkook’s head turned sharply in his direction, only to not see you anywhere.
“you’re so whipped” his friend laughs and jungkook roles his eyes, a little bit disappointed that you weren’t actually there
“whatever” jungkook mumbles as he sips his drink when a hand touches his shoulder making him almost jump. for a split second he thought it was you, so he turns with a smile but his lips turn down instantly when he sees a random girl.
“wanna dance?” hoseok can’t help the chuckle that escapes him as he watches his friend get propositioned by a random girl, jungkook almost looked scared
“no, thanks” he turns on his heels instantly, leaving his back to the girl and now hoseok laughs wholeheartedly but jungkook doesn’t find anything funny about the situation. weirdly, all he can think about is you and where the fuck you were. you said you were definitely coming and would keep him company, which he needs now more then ever as all his friends have disappeared and hoseok is one more shot away from running off from him to either hook up or throw up. pulling out his phone he was about to send you a message when a face appears in his gaze as he looks down at the lit up screen. he laughs as he sees you staring up at him and steps back, you chuckle and give him a hug. hoseok eyes the situation and instead of introducing himself, he sneaks off.
“miss me?” you ask stepping away and jungkook smiles down at you, he very much did actually but he wasn’t about to let that information out
“nah not really” he couldn’t help but chuckle as you gasp and place a hand over your chest
“well i guess i’ll be going” you turn but don’t get far when jungkook wraps his hand around your arm to pull you back
“no no, you’re not leaving me alone i only have hos-” jungkook turns but the space his friends occupied is gone and now he just looks insane “apparently i have no one but you now”
“ah just like old times, iam your only friend” the pair of you laugh together but you become very aware of a lot of eyes directly looking at you. it wasn’t everyone around you, but a hefty number of them were looking. “do you wanna get some air?” jungkook seemed to be relieved that you asked and nodded his head before leading the way out. you tried you hardest to stay behind him but with people constantly pushing past or drunkenly stumbling, it was difficult to keep close. huffing as you almost trip for the third time, you squeeze past a tall guy and grab onto the back of jungkook’s hooding making him halt his movements and look down at where you gripped him, his heart beat picking up “sorry i’ve had enough of trying to keep up with your long ass legs” he chuckles at you and shakes his head before moving again, you holding tightly onto him this time. finally making it out the back door and away from the crowd, you let go on jungkook and follow him as he walks all the way to the back of the house where a hammock was hung. it was silent for a little while the pair of you tried to sit on the hammock with falling out.
“iam sorry they were all staring” jungkook broke the small silence and you look to him next you, upset at his apology. it annoyed you that he felt the need to say sorry for something that wasn’t even his fault
“don’t apologise, why do you have to be sorry?”
“people always do when a girl is talking to me, i just don’t want them thinking badly of you. that you’re a fool for spending time with me” jungkook looked so ashamed and it broke you’re heart. unless this was some long con from him, he was exactly the same as when you knew him.
“i don’t care what people think about me jungkook, iam just happy to have my best friend back” a smile decorated his lips as he looked at you, the realisation that you were back by his side seemed so sweet at this moment.
“jungkook’s reeled in another one!” the sound of a voice shouting across the garden makes you and jungkook frown, sure it was drunk rambling but just the thought of someone talking about women in such a way had you rumbled
“at least one guy can, where’s your catch of the day?” you shout back, embarrassing the guy as he stumbles back into the main bulk of the party. it was childish to shout back, but you couldn’t help it. jungkook couldn’t help but lean his head back and laugh, he knew the guy shouting- he was at every party. always got too drunk and too handsy. “was that too childish?” you chuckle as you look over to jungkook next to you
“no, i enjoyed it” smiling to yourself you look back out to the party before looking back over to jungkook.
“will your friends be looking for you? i don’t want to take up all your time” he shakes his head before moving to sit up properly
“there probably too drunk by now to remember who i am. plus id rather catch up with you then pulled around by them, they’re to sociable for me” chuckling at this you take a moment to enjoy the comfortable silence that was growing. your thoughts of the past overtook for a moment and you couldn’t help but reminisce
“isn’t it crazy how we found each other again? i always regretted losing contact with you” slowly jungkook raises his head to look down at you on his side, his gaze so soft.
“i regret it too, i wish i had you here from the start” a smile found its way to your lips as you returned his gaze, the hustle of the party long forgotten
“jungkook? can i ask you a question?”
“of course” you take a beat to think if you wanted to ask this certain thing, but ultimately you decided you needed to
“why did you stop playing football you enjoyed so much? you never gave me a proper answer when we met again” he was taken back by the question, mostly because he didn’t want to answer it. you were the reason, he didn’t necessarily blame you for his lack of ambition to continue playing- but as soon as you weren’t by his side to encourage him, his passion was gone.
“i got old, played like shit” a snort made its way out of your nose at this excuse, jungkook chuckled along already knowing you could see through his bullshit reason.
“you have a natural talent at dodging questions, tell me the real reason” sighing, he looked away from you and to his feet. he wasn’t one to enjoy heart to hearts particularly, but this was you asking and there was no way he could deny you anything you wanted.
“y/n, when you left i tried to carry on- it just wasn’t the same. you were the only one to push me to carrying on playing as many sports as i did, without you there it just- seemed pointless” to say you were shocked was an understatement, you never expected that to be his answer and you felt- guilty. sure you had no choice, your family were moving away, you couldn’t stay even if you wanted to. but you still felt responsible, jungkook was so talented which is why to supported so wholeheartedly
“iam, sorry jungkook”
“it wasn’t your fault”
“that’s not all iam sorry for,” he looked over at you silently, having no idea what you meant
“iam sorry you lost your spark for life , iam sorry those stupid rumours spread and iam sorry i never stayed in contact” his eyes were suddenly glassy, the weight of all he was holding in felt like it suddenly released. “i can see that that twinkle behind those eyes has gone, but you deserve the best jungkook and iam determined to get that spark back to you” he stayed quiet, worried that if he even tired to saying anything his voice would break. “now, let’s get back and actually get this party”
two weeks after the party and in the pitch dark of the evening, jungkook found himself stood across from you on the campus football field. there was the distant sound of a party happening nearby, which is where he would’ve usually found himself in the past, now he couldn’t help but chuckle as he was far from the party and out in the cold watching you fumble around with an american football.
“do you even know the rules?” he asks with a little laugh and you stop messing with the ball and place it under your arm to look up at him
“no” you shrug “but i don’t need to. this is all about you buddy and getting back into the action- catch” you throw the ball at him suddenly making him jump and put his hands out. he grasps the ball momentarily but it slips from him and tumbles onto the floor “see that! you can’t even catch anymore” huffing he leans down to pick up the fallen ball before straightening back up to look at you
“you caught me by surprise! of course i didn’t get it” your hands find your hips as you look at him before shaking your head at him
“oh yeah because on the field when the opposition throws the ball they’re gonna go ‘hey jungkook pre warning iam throwing the ball now, ready to try and intercept,?” he scowls stop you momentarily but you know he’s trying not to smile at your sarcasm “younger jungkook would’ve caught that” you tease making jungkook roll his eyes at you
“younger jungkook also played and trained multiple times every week”
“younger jungkook would not have excuses, then again he was also hotter so-” your sentence is cut short as he light throws the ball at you jokingly and you catch it as you laugh. “ok, jokes aside. does it feel at least nice to be back on the field?” a little smile comes upon his face as he looked around the dimly lit field, quietly thinking about how much time he used to spend playing.
“you know what, it kinda does” he jumps a little when you clap your hands together once after putting the ball under your armpit and begin walking away from the field
“and that’s day one complete let’s go eat” you call out and he quickly rushes to your side as you continue to walk of the field
“wait that’s it? we’re not gonna throw the ball around or anything?” you stop in your tracks making his movement halt too, turning you look up at him
“jungkook, this isn’t about jumping straight back into playing. it’s about how you feel, before now you said you fell out of love it- forcing you to play immediately isn’t my aim. i want you to remember all those feeling you had when you played all the time. now, let’s eat” you finish your little speech and walk away while jungkook stands dumbfounded a little but shakes his head with a smile and runs to catch up with you.
three weeks after the party and jungkook opened his dorm door to find you stood there with a big bag and canvas’ under your arms.
“let’s paint” you say simply before walking away and jungkook rushes to put on some shoes and grab his key before chasing after you. he follows you all the way to some greenery space on campus where you stop and set down your things.
“you could’ve at least give me time to prepare myself” he mumbles out before sitting next to you and you chuckle as you unwrap all the things you had brought
“you need to prepare yourself to paint? weirdo” rolling his eyes he scoots a little closer to you to have a good look at what you were pulling out your bag. “okay! two canvases each, we have normal, water colour and charcoal. take your pick” with that you poured a little water in a dish and opened the water colour set before painting away quietly. looking at you momentarily, jungkook leans forward and grabs the normal paint with a paint brush. looking around him he decides to just paint the tree directly in his line of view. as the brush strokes sweep across the campus he embraces the calm silence that sweeps over the pair of you. it was so peaceful and it took the time to appreciate it, looking quickly over at you he noted how focused you looked. your eyebrows furrowed a little as bring the canvas in your hand a little closer to your face as you work. a slight breeze came, blowing your hair slightly and before he realised it- he was staring at you in a sort of a trance.
“okay iam done!” your voice made him blink a couple times before he quickly looks away, clearing his throat he looks over down at his canvas “wow that’s great” you compliment and he looks up to see you eyeing his work that laid in front of him.
“it’s just a tree” he shrugs but meets your eyes and you don’t look too impressed at his dismissal
“a very well painted and pretty tree” you say sternly making him chuckle, his cheeks warming slightly at your words.
“ok we’ll let me see yours” he leans forward but you put your canvas up to your chest before he gets the chance to see. he raised an eyebrow at you and goes to grab it but you stand making him look up at you “come on, let me see”
“hm iam good” his teeth catch his bottom lip before he stands up, there’s a mischievous glint in his eyes and you narrow yours at him “jungkook” you warn but he smiles before taking a swipe at the canvas and you quickly step away
“hey let me see!” you laugh before running away and without thinking he goes after you, laughing with you as he tries to grab your work but you move it out of his reach as he chases you around.
“oh my god it’s like iam watching a netflix original chick flick” taehyung mutters to yoongi as the pair watch you run around from opposite the greenery
“hm, it’s good to see him like that” yoongi says with a shrug of his shoulders “but my ass is she just his childhood best friend, i bet they’re together by the end of the year” taehyung looks over to his friend and back to the pair of you still chasing each other around like children
“end of the year?” he questions making yoongi look to him “i say within the next two months, bet fifty on it” the older chuckles and puts his hand out to initiate a shake. taehyung smiles and puts his hand in his and the pair shake on it.
“you forget how shy that kid is, really think he’s confessing by two months time?” yoongi asks making taehyung’s smile drop at the realisation “easiest fifty i ever made”
four weeks after the party and you stand opposite jungkook at the club sign up stand with your arms across your chest as you eye each other.
“iam not doing it” he states, with a hint of amusement in his tone. the football volunteer looks at the pair of you across the table as you have your little debate
“it’s just try outs jungkook stop being a baby, you like playing just do it” he tilts his head at you, smile itching to come out. he wondered why you were dragging him out of his dorm at 10am and was not that surprised when you led him all the way to the sign up table.
“i haven’t played in ages y/n, there’s no point i’ll be no good” you scoff taking him by surprise, in reality he was dying to sign his name on that piece of paper but his nerves wouldn’t allow him to do it. he didn’t wanna get out there and make a fool of himself, everyone already had certain thoughts about him and he didn’t wanna add ‘shit football player’ to there list of reasons to talk about him
“i know you want to and who cares if you haven’t played in a while? it’s not the fucking pros, iam signing you up” you conclude before leaning down to the table and picking up a pen but he rushed to snatch the pen from your grip
“okay okay wait!” he rushes out and you look up to him, waiting for him to speak “fine, i will go to try out if… you show me that painting you did last week” there’s a moment of silence as you contemplate this, ultimately you just wanted to see him back out there.
“ok” you sigh “sign your stupid name and i’ll show you when you’re finished with try outs” smiling jungkook scribbles his name and student number on this sheet before placing the pen down and looking back at you, seeing such a genuine smile on your lips- his heart skips a beat making him let out a shaky breath.
“ok breakfast time” he gets out quickly before brushing past you and heading off. you move your feet quickly to catch up with him and the volunteer watches the pair of you before looking away.
“he’s so in love with her” he mentions to his friend sat beside him who nods in agreement. once you catch up to him you pat his back making him look down to you
“thank you for signing up, i know it was properly nerve racking. you’re gonna do great i promise and i’ll be there watching” he didn’t like the way his heart rate raised slightly with excitement at the thought of you coming to watch.
“well thank you for pushing me, i guess iam nervous” he lets out as the pair of you walk onto the campus cafe.
“it’s ok to be nervous actually it’s a good thing” you say as the pair of you sit at a table close to the big windows overlooking the campus
“really?” he questions, sitting opposite you
“of course, look when i came back you didn’t have your little spark that made you- you. to see you have these feelings for the game again, it’s just nice to see” for a moment he just lets your words process, how you let out such nice words so easily took the air out of his lungs.
“hey buddy long time no see!” looking up he sees namjoon with a grin and jin by his side walking over to the table and gets up with a smile to greet them
“what’s up guys?” he says before looking back over to you “oh this is y/n, y/n these are my friends namjoon and jin” he introduces and you stand, giving each a friendly hug before you all sit back down
“wow so you’re the guys who took over my babysitting?” you joke making them laugh and jungkook roll his eyes at you
“it’s nice to finally meet you, jungkook never shut up about-” jin jumps slightly feeling jungkook’s foot meet his knee under the table making him scowl at the younger one
“you know it’s so nice to see jungkook happy again. i noticed your name on the football sign up sheet, good for you man” namjoon says, a proud hand patting jungkook on his shoulder making you smile fondly. you couldn’t help the warm feeling that brewed up watching him talk to his friends about getting back on the field.
“well we’ll be there to cheer you on buddy” jin says and you don’t fail to notice the smile that is planted on jungkooks face
“come on guys it’s only try outs” he try’s to dismiss but no one at the table lets him
“and you’re gonna be the best there, and we will be there to see it” you grab his hand momentarily that rested upon the table and namjoon and jin share a look, fighting the smirks they wanted to let out
“well we better be going, nice to meet you y/n and jungkook- see you out on the field” namjoon says before him and jin get up to leave the cafe.
it was try out day and jungkook couldn’t fight the nerves that were bubbling in his stomach as he walked with his duffle bag to the field. sure, it wasn’t a proper game but he couldn’t fight the feeling that he was just gonna mess the whole thing up and look stupid.
“you look like you’re gonna shit your guts out” he jumped at the sudden voice beside him and looked to find your grin
“gee thanks y/n” you chuckle before grabbing his upper arm to stops his movement
“you’re gonna be great ok? there’s loads of guys out there that have properly never played before and just wanted to try a new club. you’re not going to look stupid, i promise” smiling at you he nods, he wanted to reply with words but he couldn’t pull any together to truly show his gratitude for just how wonderful you’ve been since you came back. In just over a month now he managed to not attended any parties, get his grades up and get back on field. He knew you were the sole reason for all of this, but he just didn’t know how to thank you properly.
“there he is, football coaches wet dream!” jimin yells from quite a distance, making people turn there heads which made jungkook’s cheeks burn up ever so slightly as all his friends made there way to him and you
“really? you’re all here? it’s just try out guys this is embarrassing” jungkook whines making you chuckle and hoseok gasps sarcastically placing his palm over his chest
“we are not embarrassing you little shit- we’re supportive” he concludes before patting jungkook on his back “now you go warm up, the guys are already on the field. we will take care of y/n” jungkook glances at you for a moment and you nod affirmation that it’s fine
“have fun” you smile “iam off to get some embarrassing stories from your friends” rolling his eyes, jungkook walks off onto the field while you walk off with all six of his close friends, remembering he clearly classed his roommate as friend you grew confused as to why he wasn’t here “jungkook mentioned that he had roommate who is his friend but doesn’t see often. why isn’t he here?” you notice them all share silent looks between themselves as if having a telepathic conversation with on another.
“well um, his roommate isn’t the greatest of friends he could have. just wants jungkook to get laid all the time, thinks it’s the greatest fucking thing ever.” yoongi grumbles out the you all take seats just off the field. you frown at this but don’t have time to add some follow up questions
“y/n he doesn’t actually care about jungkook in any other way. in fact, since jungkook hasn’t gone to any parities with him for while, he’s basically dropped him” taehyung goes onto explain and you take a moment to process. maybe that’s why jungkook said he never saw him often? if all this roommate cared about was partying and sex, then he definitely would be avoiding jungkook at this point in time.
“what a fucking prick” you mutter out and the guys are thrown off slightly before laughing. in all honestly half of them have never met you and they knew just how much you meant to jungkook. they didn’t wanna risk telling you anything that he didn’t want you to know, but with the way you’re talking and so easily taking his side- you’d definitely fit in well
“oh he is, in all honesty we reckon that he just got close to him in the first place because he was jealous of him. i mean, everyone was talking about jungkook when he started- they completely loved him” namjoon explained and this had you thinking. jungkook had such a bad time because of those stupid rumours and he was actually loved at first by everyone? it must have been hard for him to know who actually wanted to be friends and who just wanted to say they knew him.
“well at least he has all of you guys, i can tell how much you love him” the all smile fondly at you before a loud whistles blows making you all turn your attention to the field
“he has you too now, we you love him just as much” jimin says nicely before turning to try and spit jungkook on the field.
an hour later and all of you rushed over to jungkook as the coach dismisses everyone. “you were great out there! it’s like you never left man” namjoon slings an arm around jungkook as the younger drinks a hefty amount out his water bottle, panting in between sips
“my stamina is so fucking bad now” you lean up on your toes slightly and slap the back of his head, not too hard making jump and whip to face you
“stop being so hard on yourself and take the compliment” the boys chuckle at the scene in front of them
“i like her, let’s keep her” jin let’s out making you smile while jungkook gathers his things up before slinging his bag over his shoulders before you all begin walking off together.
“how about we all grab a bite to eat?” you suggest and you never thought a simple sentence would get six guys so fired up in an instance. they all muttered between them about what to eat and where to go- it sparked quite a little debate. while they all discussed jungkook pulls you back behind them a little and you look to him.
“do you really think i did okay out there? i wasn’t to rusty? didn’t do anything stupid?” if he didn’t seem so evidently worried you would’ve slapped him again but you knew it wasn’t time to be messing around
“jungkook you were really good, i know it was just simple practices and all but you really shined out there.” he smiles at you and seems to go to say something else but someone else get ahead of him
“we’re getting pizza losers come on” jimin shouts from the little distance that was created between the pair of you and the group.
“you know you still haven’t shown me you’re painting?” a week after try outs your were sat opposite jungkook on your bed . both of your legs cross crossed. it had been a couple hours since he first arrived, the time filled with different youtube videos, snacks and games. the current form of entertainment, uno
“i was hoping you wouldn’t remember” you mutter as you place a green five onto of the pile in-between the pair of you
“what is with you not wanting to show me? you are good at art, always have been. you took all of those classes” jungkook says as he places down a green seven onto the pile and you shrug, it wasn’t about the quality of the painting more of the meaning
“ugh okay fine” you say before placing your cards face down on your bed before getting up “don’t look at my cards” you point a finger in his direction and he laughs before you turn and begin to rummage your desk drawers. grabbing it from the back you close the drawer back up and turn back to him, eyes meeting his clearly excited face. “look away” you say handing it to him, facing down. he smiles as flips it as you sit back down, his face was hard to read but jungkook was stunned as his eyes met an outline portrait of his own face made of an array of bright colours with a couple of paint splashes on the edges of the canvas. but right where his pupils should be, we’re little stars. “i was going to give it to you in a couple months time, you know when you got your little spark back and fell back in love with the small things in life again. but after seeing you at tryouts i don’t mind giving it to you now”
you’re explanation floored him, he felt his heart tighten in his chest. he knew he had good friends but no one had ever done something so… so thoughtful.
“y/n this is, this great i love it. thank you”
“well you’re very welcome, now back to business” you place one of your two cards down onto the deck, a green two “uno!” you exclaim with one card left in your hand.
“hm, don’t get too excited” jungkook let’s out before placing a plus two card onto the deck making you groan in turn making him laugh. picking up two from the spare pile you look at the three you having while jungkook decides his next move
“can i ask you something?”
“you just did” rolling you’re eyes at him you watch as he shifts through his couple of cards and you decide to continue
“how come you stopped going to the campus parties?” the question took him back, he hadn’t really thought much about partying since you came back into his life- finding a night with you way more fun then any party he’s attended here
“no reason really. i wanted to stop a while back, just lost interest. all they really involved was taeyong bringing girls to me and trying to hook me up, i grew bored of it” you nod at this as jungkook places down a colour card and say a quick ‘yellow’.
“and he’s your roommate right?” he nods to this and you take a moment to look at your cards before placing a yellow one onto the pile. “iam guessing he isn’t happy with your lack of attendance?” you ask but it comes across as more of a statement then a question
“yeah, he’s been moping around the dorm whenever i see him. although last week he stopped speaking to me all together” you raise your eyebrows slightly in shock at this, sure he could miss his friend and roommate attending parties with him. but to stop speaking to him at all because of it? that seemed a bit extreme
“does that upset you?” jungkook shrugged at this, before placing a yellow eight onto the ever growing pile in the middle of the pair of you, leaving him with three cards in his hands.
“not really, we weren’t exactly close to begin with. plus i have you and the guys, more then enough for me” you were happy to here this, honestly you didn’t want your return to ruin any existing friends he already had. placing down a green eight you claim uno once again as you you were back one card
“for fuck sake i changed the colour for a reason” he grumbles making you laugh as he picks up three cards from the untouched deck before managing to place a green five onto the deck
“well i changed it back for a reason too” you say before slamming down a pick up four, the last card in your hand “i win!”
“how nice of you to separate from your mrs’ to join us” jungkook glares at taehyung’s comment, but didn’t miss the beat his heart took at you being called his. well that’s new. he chose to ignore it
“don’t make me regret joining you” he grumbles as he plants himself on the grass, in the circle all the boys had created.
“stop teasing him” namjoon says in his defence and jungkook gives a smile as appreciation
“and stop ass kissing so you can be the best man at their wedding” another beat was skipped in his heart at taehyung’s words and it was beginning to annoy him, his heart shouldn’t be so responsive about a joke of him marrying his best friend.
“i will be the best man so no one get your hopes up” jimin joins in and everyone laughs, not jungkook though- he takes a deep breath.
“where is y/n today?” hoseok asks and all eyes go to jungkook
“she’s at a lecture right now” he mumbles, hoping the subject of you would change so his heart would stop beat so damn fast
“will she join us after?” yoongi’s question didnt aide the hoped for subject change jungkook was wanting.
“should be ending now, could ask her if you want” jungkook suggests, he was going to ask to see you today anyway, as he did everyday
“i actually have plans with her today” jungkook’s head shoots to taehyung, he what? his shock was apparently evident because his friend explains “bumped into her the other day, she takes english like me so gonna help her study, we’re going to that diner down the road” he shrugs as jungkook remains silent, sounds a lot like a study date to him- he didn’t like it. he wasn’t too sure why he didn’t like it, but he just didn’t.
“not you stealing his wife” jimin mutters, an attempt at a joke but the death stare he received from jungkook made his smile drop.
“hi guys!” a voice struck through the awkward tension and all heads turn to you coming towards them. everyone gives a small greeting but jungkook remains silent, but gives you a smile. how could he not as you squeeze yourself next to him in the circle, looking ever so pretty
pretty?
his smile dropped at his thoughts, his gazed dropped to your hand on his thigh as you dropped next to him- using it to stable yourself. his heartbeat picked up, his cheeks flushed, his mind raced. his friends began to chatter around him but he couldn’t hear a word, he knew now, knew that he liked you- more then a friend and thought terrified him. a thousand scenarios played in his imagination at once;
you finding out and never talking to him again
him confessing and you laughing in his face and never talking to him again
you finding out and dropping him with no further explanation and never talking to him again
him confessing and-
“jungkook you listening?” your voice pulls his attention and he looks at you, why were you so fucking pretty?
“he definitely wasn’t listening” hoseok laughs as does everyone else but he doesn’t, he feels sick. the look of concern on your face doesn’t help either, god you were always so thoughtful.
“i-i need to go do something” he mumbles quickly before standing and walking off, but it seemed he just couldn’t escape you, as you were not on his trail as he walked into the nearest building
“hey jungkook, what’s wrong?” he didn’t stop, no he picked up his pace breathing hard while looking “careful!” he didn’t have time to register anything before you had him pushed up against a wall, hands on his waist, body pushed up against him. a flock of students rushed past them as you held him, almost protecting him as they ran by. his breathe got caught in his throat as he looked down at you just as you turned your head and looked up at him. jungkook became hyper aware of your body against his and your hands tight on his sides, his thin shirt the only thing in between them and his skin. slowly, you pulled away and he let out a heavy sigh before pushing himself off the wall, you were still too close.
“i- uh”
“spill, you’re acting weird” he couldn’t get any words out, he tried but his mind couldn’t come up with anything and an uncomfortable silence grew thick.
“oh god i don’t want to talk about that lame excuse for a man, can’t believe i have to deal with him as a roommate” a familiar voice came from nearby and jungkook lifts his head and spots taeyong coming down the hallway. you followed his gaze before turning back
“is that your roommate?” jungkook does nothing but nod, still processing the words he heard from the boys mouth. suddenly he’s being pushed into a nearby door and into a tiny cupboard before you join him. there was barely space for a mop in it and he blushed as you squeezed in front of him, your ass pressing against his front. you closed the door just in time as taeyong stood in front of it, there were small slits in the door meaning you could hear clearly and see most of the outside.
“y/n what”
“shh” you whisper quietly and lean forward to hear better, only making your ass press into the blushing boy even more and he couldn’t even retreat anywhere.
“man i can’t believe you started those rumours about him and he still doesn’t know it was you” jungkook’s eyes widen slightly and you return the look as you turn your head to him before turning back to listen
“still thinks it was that girl he hooked up with the first time.” taeyong scoffs before continuing “he should be thanking me though, gave him ass on tap” you rolled your eyes at this but jungkook remained frozen, his roommate spread those rumours about him? he’s the reason no girl on campus wanted anything serious with him?
“mate you only did that because people started to like him more than you”
“yeah well now they think he hates relationships and think girls are nothing more then a good fuck, i made sure of it” with that the voices faded and you slowly opened the door before stepping out but jungkook remained stood.
“let’s go jungkook” you spoke softly but the look on your face screamed that you were furious. slowly he steps out and you close the door behind him “how fucking dare he, what kind of person does something like that? we’re going straight to the school board and we’re reporting his ass”
“y/n, i don’t want to think about this right now. can we just, go do something?” your heart broke, he sounded so hurt so betrayed and it pained you to see it. the whole ordeal made jungkook push his new feelings aside, he just needed your company right now.
“iam moving dorms” they were the first words jungkook had spoken to taeyong for a long time. he thought his roommate was just being dramatic and ignoring him for ditching parties, but he was wrong. without jungkook’s attendance he couldn’t push girls in his direction and buff up his made up stories. it only took a couple of days for his request to switch to be accepted and he was glad for it because every time he saw taeyongs face he just wanted to bash the living shit out of him
“woah what you talking about buddy?” jungkook’s eye twitched at the audacity of him, how two faced could one person be?
“iam not your buddy” taeyongs facarde dropped slightly, his fake smile turning into a frown. “don’t ever come anywhere near me again, or i swear to god i will beat the fuck out of you”
“what the fuck is your problem?” jungkook’s patience was running very thin with each word that came out of the mans mouth. he had his days of being sad and now he was just angry.
“hm let’s have a think, what could possibly be my problem with you?” he mocks thinking as taeyong just stares at him, jaw locked “oh i know, maybes it’s you talking behind my fucking back and ruining my reputation” shock spilled across his ex roommates face but jungkook was finished with this conversation, he walked l to his room to pack up his things- empty boxes already there waiting to be filled. but taeyong didn’t seem to be finished as he followed him
“so what i said some things about you? gave you some good lays didn’t i?” jungkook closed his he’s momentarily in frustration at the man speaking behind him. god how did he stand him for this long? calling human women lays? was he always this infuriating? “not my fault that slag came into your life and cockblocked you” jungkook’s back straightens. his hands turn into fists.
“get the fuck away from me, and keep her name out of your mouth” he gets out through gritted teeth not turning to face the the man because he didn’t think he could hold back if he looked at him. taeyong mocks a laugh
“how good is that fucking pussy for you to be whipped so badly?” he whipped around and before he knew what he was doing his fist connected to taeyong’s face making him stumble backwards, his had flew to his cheek before he chuckled with no humour behind it. he lunged forward at jungkook and the two began to throw punches, knocking things over in the room as they did so. taeyong grabs jungkook by his shirt “you think you’re so fucking perfect don’t you! you’re so pathetic!” jungkook grips his shoulders, shoving him off before pushing him again making taeyong stumble into a desk making everything on it tumble to the ground, including the painting you had done of him making loud several bangs. breathing hard as he looks at the fallen painting, he exits the rooms in a hast, face hurting and blood trickling down his cheeks. he was sure he’d ended up killing the guy if he carried on so left making sure to slam the door behind him and heading straight across campus with one place in mind. he ignores all the stares thrown his way from other students as he stomps into the girls dormitory and straight to your door. he knocks a couple times before you open the door
“jungkook oh my god!” he manages a smile at your shock before he’s pulled in by you and lead straight to your room “sit” you order and he listens, planting himself on your bed immediately. you leave momentarily before returning with a small first aid box in your hands and sit next to him. opening your supplies instantly. “you look awful” he lets out a laugh before wincing, the cut on his lip stinging. you put some liquid onto a cotton swab before gently gripping his face, turning him to look at you. he takes a sharp intake of breath as you dab the swab onto his lip but as you continue he just stares at you. blinking slowly he takes you in, pyjama shorts tight on your thighs and crop top snug on your torso.
he thinks as you work on his face, about the blind date you went on, about your speech declaring to help him bring his sparkle back, to your painting you did of him. every single moment since you came back was dedicated to him, to helping him enjoy everything he fell out of love with since you’d left. football, painting everything you did was to help him fall back in love with the life he lost when you went away, but he realised something in that moment as he watched you wipe cream onto his wounds. it wasn’t those things that he was in love with, it was you. he didn’t love playing football, he loved seeing you cheer for him on the sidelines. it wasn’t painting that he loved, it was you painting beside him that he loved. you cared for him, you listened to him, you wanted his opinion. jungkook realised in that single moment that everything that made him feel alive ever since he was a kid, all came back to you and suddenly his feelings didn’t scare him like they did before, they ignited something in him. they ignited want and desire but also a feeling of warmth and peace.
it happened in the blink of an eye, he leant down and smashed his lips into yours, hand coming up to hold the back of your head- fingers threading through your hair. you dropped the swab, hand fumbling on the bed making the tin fall to the ground, the contents spilling onto the floor. jungkook pulls back slightly, lips still hovering over yours and you could feel his breath.
“iam sorry i-” you didn’t let him finish, leaning forward planting your lips on his again in a rushed motion making him groan. his hand reaches down, gripping your thigh before lifting you onto his lap without breaking the kiss. you gently bite onto his bottom lip making him gasp from the slight sting of his cut but also the feeling of your teeth digging into him which allowed you to stick your tongue into his mouth. his hands moved up your thighs before grazing your ass then trailed up gripping your waist, pulling you into him harder. his touch set your skin alive in a phantom burning sensation making you grind into him, his head falls back breaking the kiss and he whines quietly at your movement. and it was the best fucking noise you have ever heard. your lips move to his neck making him fall back on the bed and you follow him, attacking the spot underneath his ear “fuck, y/n” he whispers and you have to suppress a groan that’s bubbling in your throat. his grip tightens on your waist, and you feel how hard he is underneath you, you’re shorts not creating much of a barrier. you’re satisfied with the mark you leave behind, knowing you’ve wanted nothing more then to claim this man ever since you were teenagers. licking a strip from the base of his neck to the mark beneath his ear he shivers and you immediately go back to his lips before he leans his head into your bed
“this was not one of the scenarios that i thought about happening” he pants and you chuckle at him
“you’ve made up scenarios about this?” he suddenly groans in embarrassment
“i shouldn’t have said that”
“what if i said i made up scenarios too?” you ask and his eyes snap to yours “so many times” you lean and whisper directly into his ear and he moans “always thought about this, you under me, me under you. but with less clothes” jungkook’s sighs before you’re suddenly flipped over making you gasp as he lies between your legs.
“if you don’t shut that pretty mouth of yours iam gonna come before any of our clothes are off”
waking up with the sunlight hitting his face, jungkook groans as his eyes flutter open. he’s confused for a second as his surroundings isn’t his dorm but he instantly smiles when he remembers where he is. turning over his eyes meet you, blankets wrapped around you as you face his direction. you were still asleep, hair sprawled on the pillow, sighing he runs his hand on your waist before it moves to your back. you sigh in your sleep before shuffling into his direction, his arms instantly go to hug you into him and your arm goes over his waist making his heart leap. he felt the happiest he’s been since you left, this was the best outcome he could’ve asked for. jungkook had no idea where the confidence came from to kiss you last night, he just couldn’t hold it back now he knew his true feelings. his attention drew to you as he felt you stir awake, looking down your eyes open slowly.
“morning” he mumbles and you sigh before moving onto your back to stretch
“good morning” you let out before yawing and coming back to cuddle into him, making his heart flutter
“i guess we should talk about last night”
“sorry, don’t want to date just wanted to see if the rumours were true” jungkook leans away to look at you but kept his arms around your body “kidding” you say before running your hands down his chest
“you’re so mean” he grumbles making you laugh as you move your hands to his neck, pulling him back to you. he moves down and snuggles his head into you neck, allowing you to cuddle him as you run your fingers through his hair making his eyes close
“isn’t it weird that this doesn’t feel weird?” you ask making him grin. he agreed, nothing about this felt wrong it felt so right.
“iam just going to count everything before this as foreplay” you laugh at this and jungkook joins you
“that was some interesting foreplay” sighing you drop your hand to his shoulder but quickly jungkook grabs your hand and brings it back to his hair, smiling you continue playing with it “so what do you want now? for us i mean?” you were worried about the response, you couldn’t help it. you knew exactly what you wanted from this but you weren’t too sure about jungkook
“isn’t it obvious? iam obsessed with you y/n, iam annoyed i didn’t realise it sooner” your eyes widen at the information but he doesn’t stop “no one has ever meant as much to me as you do, everything you’ve tried to make me love again since you’ve been back doesn’t amount to you. i can’t believe i’ve never noticed it before, my life went to shit went we fell out of contact and it instantly got better when you came back. i need you in my life y/n, i really don’t know what i would do if you wasn’t” your breathing stilled momentarily, you heartbeat heavy. god you felt the exact same way, your life abroad was boring and empty without him. it was the main reason you came back with your parents when they said they were returning
“jungkook, i feel the same about you. you’re one of the most interesting people i’ve ever met. you deserve so much and there isn’t one day that goes by where i wouldn’t drop everything for you” his chest tightened, why had it take them so fucking long to get to this point? he didn’t know but now you were at that point and he was sure that he was never going to let you slip from him again.
jungkook smiled as you walked hand in hand to the greenery on campus to meet with the rest of the boys.
“oh my god it’s happening” taehyung gasps, holding his hand over his heart making you laugh as jungkook sits down and pulls you to sit between his legs. the whole group began clapping making you hide behind your hands but jungkook simply laughed, although a red tint did rise on his cheeks. after they’re done yoongi holds out some money in taehyung’s direction and he happily takes it, making everyone look at them
“did you bet on them getting together?” namjoon asks and yoongi nods making jungkook roll his eyes
“i said by the end of the year, he said by two months. i didn’t count on his shy ass actually making a move” yoongi explains making you chuckle but you stop when you see the other boys begin to swap money between them
“you all fucking bet on us?” you ask in disbelief and they all shrugged with smiles on their faces.
“you’re all horrible friends” jungkook mumbles but that only makes them smile more.
“we’re the best, and in fact i was the one who set you two up on that blind date. you probably wouldn’t even know you went to the same college if it wasn’t for me” hoseok says smugly but you making a noise making everyone turn to you and jungkook look down at you from behind
“y/n?” he asks and you smile
“actually i saw you at a party before the date. i was pretty sure it was you but i wasn’t too sure, i kept staring at you, probably looked creepy as fuck” you chuckle at the memory but jungkook furrows his eyebrows in thought, but jimin beat him to it
“yes i remember! that was you?”
“you saw me?” you asked, horrified you had been caught out
“it was pretty obvious you just stood there staring at him” he laughs and you groan, leaning back into jungkook who’s arms wrap around your front
“i can’t believe that was you, if only i turned around” he thinks out loud as everyone else begins to chat separately.
“i kind of prefer the way we met again, it was unexpected. makes for a good story, almost as if it was fate” jungkook never thought he believed in fate but right now, he just might. and as he looked around at all of his friends, and new girlfriend, laughing with each other he felt content. sure he had fallen back in love with all the little things he used to, but more importantly he realised he loved you all those years ago- and he fell right back in love the moment you turned around in front of that music building when he saw for the first time again.
#bts fanfic#jungkook#taehyung#jimin#seokjin#bts imagine#namjoon#yoongi#hoseok#jungkook friends to lovers#jungkook x y/n#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#jungkook fanfic#jungkook oneshot
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BTS fic recs: March 2024
I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹
❗Most of these fics are smutty or dark as hell, so minors dni.❗
If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the fic, it might seem like a tiny gesture, but it really means a lot for writers and I can guarantee it will put a smile on their faces💜 Let’s share and give lots of love!
Looking for more to read? Check ‘The Library’ or last years recs 🙂
[index] → jan | feb (jhs) | 💜 (myg) | apr | may | jun | jul | aug | sep (jjk)(knj) | oct (pjm) | nov | dec (kth)(ksj) |
Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻, fantasy = 🪄.
⭐Mistletoe @belovedkingx [9.3k]
// knj x f.reader // christmas!au, f2l // 🥰🥵
📝 christmas is all about spending time with the ones you love, having fun and creating beautiful memories but that was never how it turned out for you. You were dreading the annual family Christmas, but an idea was proposed to you, and shockingly Namjoon agreed to it as well as yourself. But will it help or will it turn out to be a mistake?
🗨️ this was just so cute 🥹🥰
⭐Holiday Shambles @ressjeon [5k]
// knj x f.reader // christmas!au, married!au // 🥰🥵🌩️
📝 when you have to spend time with both your parents and Namjoon’s snobby ones for this Christmas, you’re forced to show the best version of you even knowing what’s to come. you’re ready, right? after all, you’re the best wife aren’t you?
🗨️ this is so hilarious, cute and sweet 🥹 Loved it✨
⭐New Guy @kithtaehyung [5k]
// knj x f.reader // university!au, e2l // 🥵
📝 all you want to do is have a successful meeting after experiencing dwindling attendance. but the new guy is completely disrupting things… or is he?
🗨️ so many feels about this one; all good and dirty ones!!! I had a feeling about the twist but I wasn’t sure. But I would very much love for a Joonie in grey joggers to knock on my door please 🥺🤭 Anyway, it was extremely good, as is everything you do and write! And it was so fucking HOT, like the tension, incredible! It really had me 🥵 So, so fucking good— love it 💖💯
⭐Entirety @btsgotjams27 [3.3k]
// knj x f.reader // slice of life!au, f2l // 🥵🥰
📝 namjoon is the complete package, except for the fact that he won’t make the first move.
🗨️ AFGJFKGHLKFDHGJGKJHG— 🥵🥵🥵 Yes, I’ve resulted to key smashing because I’m speechless, but I’ll try to give a few words anyway: first, this was incredibly hot, I can’t even begin to articulate properly, and the writing, like I’m a so in love with the writing, like the language is so descriptive and imaginative that I can clearly imagine every little fucking detail— and the words? Well they just flow seamlessly! ✨
⭐My Plus One @btsgotjams27 [5.4k]
// ksj x f.reader // fake dating!au, i2l // 🥰🌩️
📝 when you and jin have weddings to attend, you decide to help one another by agreeing to being each other's plus ones.
🗨️ It was so sweet, it was cute and fluffy and so damn funny! Like there were so many times I was just laughing with the biggest grin plastered on my face. So thank you, thank you for writing this and for cheering me up ✨💯
⭐Meet Me at the Bar [epilogue] @eoieopda [7.5k]
// ksj x f.reader // law school!au, study buddies, bf2l // 🥰😂🥵
📝 you're supposed to be staring down the barrel of the last — and most important — examination of your life, but you only have eyes for your study buddy.
🗨️ omg these two cute fools are so fucking adorable 😭 It was really good, loved everything in it, the writing, the characters and how they have been in love with each other for so long but never said anything to each other, and FINALLY, BAM ✨
⭐Forever @oddinary4bts [25.2k]
// ksj x f.reader // idol!au, ex-fiancés to lovers // 🥰🥵🌩️
📝 three years ago, your relationship with jin ended in fights and tears. When life puts him back on your path, you catch a glimpse of light in his eyes that you thought had died when you broke up. Will your relationship blossom into a well-deserved forever or will you lose the love of your life again?
🗨️ so much love and sadness in this! The nostalgia is high, there’s a lot of feelings, a lot of heartbreak. The thoughts about going back for fear of getting your heart broken again, or moving on and shielding the broken pieces of heartbreak? Fuck! So fucking good. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: everything Ella writes is just pure gold 🥹✨
⭐A Time Just for Us [part of a completed series] @bluewhale52 [5.4k]
// myg x f.reader // established relationship, idol!au // 🥰🥵
📝 you are desperate for a baby.
🗨️ I haven’t even read the series– like I started with this, but it was so freaking good! It was somehow cute, but very very very dirty 😂🥵
⭐Cat Cafes and More @jeonsbabygirlsworld [0.7k]
// myg x f.reader // established relationship // 🥰
📝 you insist yoongi to visit the cat cafe which has cats up for adoption which ends up you adopting a white Persian cat even though you have holly with you both.
🗨️ omg this was just so fucking cute 😭💕Overall just a really cute, fluffy and lovely drabble 🥰💜
⭐Less of Them [ongoing series] @casuallyimagining [currently loading]
// myg x f.reader // established relationship, arranged marriage!au, star-crossed lovers // 🥵🌩️🥰🪄
📝 as the daughter of one of the oldest families in the kingdom, when the king decides that it's you he wishes to marry, you're forced to make a decision and fulfill your duty, leaving behind everything you've ever known--and the only man you've ever loved.
🗨️ this chapter was so fucking good, I don’t even know where to begin! First, it was so sad and emotional (at least for me 😭), like OC has been through so fucking much 😭 The poor thing is traumatized and the whole paragraph about her learning the royal life that her father never could have prepared her for 😭😭😭 It’s such an amazing story, you simple have to read it if you haven’t. There’s two out of three parts out.
⭐Would u? [3tan drabble ongoing series] @kithtaehyung [2.3K]
// myg x f.reader // brother’s best friend!au // 🥰
📝 you see a certain fruit-centered trend online.. and decide to test it on yoongi.
🗨️ so fucking sweet and fluffy… This was just so cute, I just love this couple and I can’t get enough of them omg 🥹 and reader being on her period and Yoongi just distracting her pain away, by naturally being himself and doing mundane things 🥹 so domestic I love it! 😭✨ And the tangerines 😭😭😭💖
⭐Strawberry Sundae @youtifulhobi [6k]
// jhs x f.reader // slice of life!au, lifeguard!hobi, olympian swimmer!reader, established relationship // 🥰
📝 a few years after you begin dating Jung Hoseok, the two of you reminisce about how you met when he was a lifeguard and saved you from drowning, when in reality you had just fell off your strawberry floatie and he just wanted to talk to you.
🗨️ honestly, this is just fucking cute, adorable really! I really loved it and it’s definitely one of my favorite Hoseok fics now 🥰💯
⭐Sweetest Crush @minjoonalist [4.7k]
// jhs x f.reader // brother’s best friend!au // 🥵
📝 what would you do if your friend’s younger sibling suddenly asks you for sex?
🗨️ KBFKDSBFKGH it was so filthy I don’t even know what I read (also there’s just something about a brother’s best friend!!!) 🥵😂
⭐Melatonin @taeinparis [3k]
// jhs x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰
📝 sleeping at night was difficult for you, and atop of your boyfriend’s lawn mower-esk snoring, it was impossible. But luckily for you, he knows just the remedy to cure your sleeplessness (and hopefully his snoring).
🗨️ Iiiih this was so dirty, I loved it 💖 there was also a dash of fluff sprinkled in there, but mainly just smut 😂 🥵✨
⭐Our ‘Get Along’ Shirt @dreamyjoons [14.2k]
// pjm x f.reader // e2l // 🥵
📝 another day, another endless round of you and Jimin bickering. It’s never ending, all-consuming, and your friends have had enough. Namjoon decides to end it once and for all - with help from a shirt for squabbling toddlers.
🗨️ JFHKJSFKSDJDH— This was so fucking hilarious 😂 The sexual tension between them was SO HIGH 🥵 and when they finally snapped, oh dear God, it was so good! And the whole shit concept, so hilarious and their banter 😂 AND THE SWEAT??? I’m weak okay!! So freaking good, I loved it so much and Namjoon and the rest of the gang were just priceless. Jin at the end had me laughing so hard 🤭💯
⭐Just a Taste @yoonieper [14.2k]
// pjm x f.reader // vampire!au, established relationship // 🥵🌩️😂
📝 they said having a relationship with a human wasn’t a good idea, but Jimin liked you too much to ever let that get in the way. Your relationship was beautiful, yes you didn’t know that small important detail about him being a bloodthirsty vampire, but he had it under control. That’s at least what he thought, he never would have predicted a drought….
🗨️ FUCK 😭 This was so fucking good I don’t even know where to begin??? The story in itself was so extremely good, whaaat. And Jimin was so nice, and their love for each other, so fucking pure 💜 This was an emotional rollercoaster and I fucking loved everything about it 😭 and the smut, God, it was so good— I don’t know what to say 😭 And then at the ending, the angst, fuck, I was so afraid if it was going to end just like that, but I was so glad that they found each other again 😭 This is a new favorite of mine, so good, it was slightly sad at times, like angsty, but the love that the have for each other, FUCK. So so fucking incredible 😭 Don’t mind all the crying, it’s happy tears, I promise 💖💯 Also, it’s mostly told in Jimin’s POV, which I just freaking love and it makes the story so good!!!
⭐High on Love @peachypinkygloss [6.4k]
// pjm x f.reader // established relationship, racer!jimin // 🥵
📝 Jimin has once again won a race and he takes you out on a ride for the night, taking dangerous but very exciting risks. He should have expected that the rush of adrenaline in your body always turns you into a horny mess.
🗨️ I am just BLOWN AWAY by the fic– holy molly, was it dirty? Yes! Needy? Yes! Cute? Yes! Oh and the car racing, love, love, love! Like, everything in this. And the smut 🥵🥵🥵 I mean, it was so dirt and needy (yes I know I’m using the same words, lol), but FUCK. Incredible! Another ont to add to my faves ✨ And a big bonus for the phone messages, because that was fucking hot too!!! 🥵💯
⭐Bodyguard (there’s a pt 2) @yoonpobs [2.1k]
// kth x f.reader // e2l, bodyguard!au // 🥵
📝 you protect taehyung from people but forget about the biggest threat. yourself.
🗨️ omg 🥵 This extremely good, so enticing and there was just all the build up sexual tension at the end— ugh! So good! 🥵 There wasn’t any smut in it, but damn it, it was still very lustful (I love those undertones). What’s not to love? It’s short, sweet and sensual ✨💯 There’s even a part two that I haven’t read yet!!!
⭐New Tricks @geniuslab [10.1k]
// kth x f.reader // dog trainer!au, s2l // 🥵😂🥰
📝 when your newly adopted puppy turns out to be a lot more work than you expected, a cute dog trainer comes to the rescue. You soon become friends, but you begin to realize friendship might not be all you want.
🗨️ awww this was so fucking cute and fluff, I loved it som much 💖💯
⭐In my Head @sketchguk [8k]
// kth x f.reader // college!au // 🥵🌩️
📝 taehyung’s friends love you ー adore you. they probably want to fuck you, but they’ll never admit to it. instead, they’ll push taehyung’s limits in the middle of a frat party, testing just how close they can get to you before he takes you to bed in a fit of jealousy. and maybe, just maybe, one of his friends can have a taste too (if he’s lucky).
🗨️ okay, okay. This was hella 🥵 Like WOAH, filthy, steamy and just dirty! I am so mad at Taehyung though! Like why can’t he be with OC? What is it that he can’t give her? But tbh, with the way that he’s acting, I feel like she should just get with one of his friends instead 😭 Like, it seems like Guk loves her so much, or Jimin, the little freak he was in this 🥵
⭐Gold Rush @ditttiii [4.4k]
// kth x f.reader // s2l!au // 🥵🌩️
📝 kim taehyung is a walking heartbreak waiting to happen. all narrow eyes and long nose and devilish smirks, he is everyone’s dream. after months of sharing an elevator with the man who makes your heart race until you can scarcely breathe when the chance finally comes; are you willing to risk it all for his touch?
🗨️ OMG— I finally got to read this, and FUCK. SHIT. It is INSANELY beautiful (and sad too 🥹). But goddamn it, the love OC has for Taehyung, oh my. And the bittersweet feelings are what makes this hauntingly beautiful 💖 Again, I have a hard time coming up with words, words for how beautiful this masterpiece truly is 😭 Just— perfection 💯 Also, because it was so bittersweet, I really love the open ending, like getting to imagine whatever you like for this couple 😭💜
⭐To Give a Helping Hand (part 2) @oddinary4bts [3.1k]
// jjk x f.reader // idol!au // 🥵
📝 when Jungkook finally approaches you at the gym, he realizes you’ve been wanting him just as badly as he’s been wanting you.
🗨️ In case you haven’t read part two, here’s your psa to do so right now. It’s just incredible (as everything that Ella writes, tbh ✨). OC is really being a brat in this one and JK is down baaaaaad 🥵
⭐Desire [ongoing series] pt1 + pt2 @jeonsbabygirlsworld [3k]
// jjk x f.reader + myg x f.reader (ft. eunwoo) // slice of life!au // 🥵🌩️
📝 life was easy until you meet the eye candy of your life and the adventure with him is a hell of ride, but there is certain someone who seems to get hurt in this.
🗨️ It’s a very interesting story, it’s very complex and I can’t wait to read more!
⭐When Worlds Collide [ongoing series] @letjungcoook7 [currently loading…]
// jjk x f.reader // college!au, slice of life!au, s2l, fuckboy!jk, virgin!reader // 🥵🌩️
📝 since your mother's passing a year ago, life has been a whirlwind. balancing your passion for ballet with a low-key presence at college, where you’re the top student, was your norm until Jungkook stepped into your world. known for his reputation preceding him, jungkook is the talk of the campus with his casual rendezvous that have the girls buzzing. despite his allure, you're puzzled by his need for your tutoring prowess, especially given his own academic merit. yet, succumbing to his persistent requests, you reluctantly agree, only to find yourself thrust into the spotlight you've always avoided.
🗨️ I’ve read the first two parts and they are AMAZING! The story is so interesting and I already know that there’s so much more to Jungkook and OC in this one. So exciting to read more!! ❤️🔥
⭐Liquor Lips @letjungcoook7 [1.5k]
// jjk x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵
📝 author didn’t write a summary.
🗨️ it was incredible good, like I want to read more (it’s not a series though!). It’s the perfect dirty little one-shot/drabble ❤️🔥
This month was really tough for me, mentally… I struggled with my own mental health and it got really bad. I was writing my major series (18 chapters god what was I thinking 😂) at the same time (still am lol), and I struggled with reading as I used to, so the list isn’t as long as normally, maybe, I did try to read a lot by the end of the month to make up for it. But yeah 🫶 Hopefully I have more time next month, because I expect to finish my series there, and then I’ll take a small break from writing and just read, because I really miss it 🥹
If you want more, you’re more than welcome to follow me! I do monthly rec lists and sometimes I post my own writing too (only bangtan).
Love you and Borahae 💜
#bts fic recs#bts fic#bts fics#bts imagine#bts imagines#bts scenarios#yoongi smut#Yoongi x reader#bts smut#namjoon x reader#bts x reader#bts fanfiction#bts fanfic#bts fanfction#bts x reader smut#bts x you#bts x y/n#bts x oc#jimin x reader#pjm x reader#seokjin x reader#hoseok x reader#knj x reader#jhs x reader#bangtan x reader#bangtan smut#bangtan fanfic#bangtan fic#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut
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