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alvojake · 3 months

Note

heyy can you write about ab riding smut of any member(s) you'd like

「note」 : anon I wanna kiss your beautiful brain! Gamer Heeseung has a death grip on me and so I present to you the cliche riding gamer boyfriend Heeseung while he games.

On The Downlow | L.HS

「paring」 : gamer!bf!heeseung x fem!reader 「word count」 : 2.2k

「synopsis」 : your boyfriend had a hard week at work, and you wanted nothing more than to pamper him and help him relieve his stress. but you barely made it past lunch when he went running to his video games. so you come up with a new plan that involves a new little lingerie set you bought just for him, but it doesn't exactly go as you planned it.

「genre」 : smut with little plot, a tinge of fluff, and crack

「warning」 : riding, unprotected sex (just don't), dom!heeseung x sub!reader, cursing, slight orgasm denial, exhibitionism, petnames (baby, babydoll, beautiful, brat, slut...), praising, degradation, heeseung spanks the reader like once, mentions of porn, lmk if I missed anything!!

“God dammit Jake I said your left!!” Heeseung shouted at his friend as his fingers furiously smashed on the keyboard keys. He had been at this since about noon when he got a message from Sunghoon telling him to hop on.

It was almost midnight now and the dinner that you had made for the both of you had long since gone cold. He had promised that he would only be on for a few hours then he was all yours. You knew better than to believe him because the outcome was always the same. He’d be on it for so long that you eventually just fall asleep.

However, you wanted to do something nice for your boyfriend seeing as he had a long week at work. You were going to try and help him relax, but he ran to the animated characters on the screen instead.

You sat on the edge of your shared bed, knees tucked under you as you watched him intently. Watching as his eyebrows furrowed when things took a wrong turn, the way his bottom lip would get stuck between his teeth during an intense match. You could feel the need getting stronger, the heat that was pooling in your gut was now turning into a raging fire.

“Hee.” You called out to the dark-haired male but got no response. Standing from the bed carefully you made your way over to the closet.

You were going to save this until you two could finally have some fun together, but now you had another plan in mind. Looking over your shoulder you could see Heeseung was still absorbed in his game so you quickly and carefully grab a shopping bag you had hidden. Peeking inside you made sure everything was still inside before tiptoeing to the bathroom.

With one glance at your boyfriend, you quietly shut the door and started to quickly strip out of your sleep clothes. You had bought a cute purple lace lingerie set just for Heeseung because you knew how crazy he got when he’d see you in purple.

Once it was completely on you looked at yourself in the mirror, the fabric hugged your breast perfectly and the garter belt accentuated your waist beautifully. Your fingers grazed over the embroidered flowers as you smirked. You knew he’d absolutely love it.

Walking back into the room you were met with Heeseung screaming at Sunghoon about missing a shot which got him killed. You had to be quick otherwise he’d turn and look over to check on you while he was down. Sitting on the bed you grabbed the blanket, wrapping it around your body completely just as he looked over.

His eyebrows scrunched together as he pulled one side of the headphones off, “Baby what are you doing still awake?”

You met his eyes with a small pout, “I was waiting for you.”

Heeseung smiled softly with a shake of his head, “I’m sorry beautiful, I’ll be done soon I promise.”

“That's what you said a few hours ago, Hee.” Your bottom lip jutted out and oh how Heeseung just wanted to go over and kiss you stupid, but he promised the guys a few more rounds.

“Just a few more rounds and I’m yours I swear.” With that, he turned back around when the guys called for him.

A smirk spread on your lips as you watched him get back into the match, barking orders. Carefully you removed the blanket from your body, standing up and making your way over to your unsuspecting boyfriend.

You waited until he was in the lobby waiting for the next round to make your move. Heeseung jumped slightly when he felt your hand on his arm, his eyes throwing a quick glance at you before going back to the screen. You rolled your eyes before tugging his hand off of the keyboard and climbing into his lap.

Heeseung hummed softly as he placed his hand on your lower back to steady your body. His eyes were torn away from the screen when he felt the lacey fabric under his fingertips. “Are you oka- fuck baby.” Heeseung’s eyes racked your body, his dick twitching in his sweats.

“Heeseung dude, what the fuck are you doing?” You could hear Jay through Heeseung’s headphones and you smirked at him. He glared at you as his grip tightened on your waist.

“Sorry, I’m back.” He grumbled as he moved closer to the desk successfully trapping you between his body and the hard surface. You could hear the boys teasing him as well as feel the heat rushing up his neck as you placed small kisses against his skin.

Heeseung bit down on his tongue to keep any noises from slipping as you bit and sucked on his sensitive skin. His eyes still focused on the screen trying his best to ignore your little antics. Your hands roamed over his body before finding his hardening cock, palming it softly.

He quickly muted the mic before grabbing your wrist, stopping your movements, and gaining your attention. Your eyes meeting his dark and hooded ones, you couldn’t help but stifle a laugh which Heeseung did not find too amusing.

“Do you think this is funny?” His voice dropped an octave as he pulled your hand away from his crotch.

You just pouted, shoulders slouching, “You’ve been ignoring me all night.”

Heeseung had to bite back the smirk that was threatening to spread on his lips, “I told you that I was gonna play a few more rounds then I was yours.” You huffed before moving further up his lap, your core aching for some kind of attention. Heeseung watched your movements with a smug gaze, watching as you slowly rolled your hips against his, eliciting a soft moan from your lips. “You’re so impatient, baby.” A yelp left your lungs as Heeseung landed a harsh smack against the skin of your ass.

“Hee-” “Here’s the deal baby,” His hand grabbed your ass, squeezing harshly making you whimper, “since you want to be a needy little brat, you’re gonna ride my cock and you don’t get to cum until I tell you.” You whined knowing you wouldn’t last very long, not in the state that you were in now, but you nodded nonetheless. Heeseung chuckled before leaning closer to you, “Oh and try not to make any noise, you don’t want the boys to know how much of a desperate slut you are, right?”

You shook your head in protest because you both knew how vocal you were in bed, but Heeseung just ignored your protest as he unmuted his mic, apologizing when the string of curses from the boys came through.

It didn’t even take two minutes before you were scooting down your boyfriend's legs to untie his sweatpants. The need and lust started to cloud your mind, so much so that a whine left your lips when you pulled his pants and boxers down enough for his hard cock to spring free.

Heeseung gave you a pointed look causing you to mumble an apology. You bit your lip as you grabbed his dick in your hand, pumping him slowly. You started to tease him because it was only fair. After all, he left you waiting for so long, right?

Heeseung closed his eyes as he tried to concentrate on the game in front of him, but it was growing increasingly difficult as your movements sped up. Your thumb swiped over his angry tip, spreading his pre-cum causing him to hiss.

“Yo dude, are you sure you’re good?” Jake asked and Heeseung coughed out an ‘I’m fine’ before glaring down at you.

You just met his eyes, feigning innocence but he knew better than that.

“I’ll be right back, I ran out of water,” His words were rushed as he muted his mic once more, ignoring the guy's protest. He removed your hand from his shaft before pulling you flush against him, “it seems like someone doesn’t wanna cum.”

“No-” “Then stop fucking teasing.” He growled against your lips causing you to whimper, but you nodded.

Heeseung released you and you quickly moved back a little bit to slide your panties to the side. He watched you intently as you grabbed his cock to line his tip with your dripping cunt. You slid down him slowly, savoring the stretch he gave.

Growing impatient Heeseung grabbed your hips and pulled you down onto him swiftly, causing a loud moan to leave your lips, fingers digging into his shoulders. He mumbled filthy things in your ear as he rubbed circles on your lower back.

“Now be a good girl and ride my cock while I play.” Heeseung kissed your temple before leaning forward to unmute his mic. However, his movement caused him to push deeper inside you and you quickly buried your face in his neck to muffle the whines. “Sorry guys, I'm back.”

You slowly rolled your hips against his until you fully adjusted to him. Quiet, breathy moans left your lips as you started to slowly bounce on your boyfriend's dick. His free hand rests on your hip, helping to keep you steady as your pace picks up.

“Fuck Seungie I-” You bit your lip hard as his tip brushed over your sweet spot, moans threatening to slip.

As your pace increased you were sure that the guys could hear the wet, lewd sounds that were leaving your cunt, if they did they didn’t say a word. Heeseung was enjoying the way you tried to keep quiet, maybe a little too much. He knew that telling you to be quiet was like trying to tell a toddler to stop crying. It wouldn’t work, not for long at least.

So he had a new goal in mind, he was going to make you break and finally release those pretty sounds you make. He didn’t care if his friends could hear, no he wanted them to hear you. He wanted them to know that you were his and that he was the only one who could make you feel this good.

With that, his grip on your hip tightened before he thrusted up into you harshly causing a loud gasp to leave your parted lips. Your eyes met his, not missing the sinister gleam as he continued to thrust into you.

“Hee- fuck.” You cried out as his tip kissed your cervix, not really caring if anyone could hear you. The way Heeseung’s cock was reaching all the right places felt good, too good to care.

“Dude, what the fuck was that?” “Was that y/n?” You could hear the boys on the headset and instantly bite your lip, quieting your noises once more.

Heeseung chuckled before moving his mic and kissing your cheek as you continued to ride him, “Go ahead baby, let them hear how good I make you feel.”

With his permission, you released your lip as a choked moan tore through your lips, “Seungie I wanna cum, please.” You whined out as your movements grew sporadic, your thighs burning.

“Not yet baby, wait for me.” Heeseung’s voice came out soft, making you nod despite the need to cum. “Good girl.” You whined at the praise as your lips latched onto his skin, anchoring yourself so you wouldn’t cum too soon.

“Bro, are you for real watching porn right now?” Sunghoon groaned, causing the other guys to start laughing.

“Oh no, I’ve got something way better than porn on right now.” Heeseung chuckled before a groan tore through his throat as you squeezed around him. He couldn’t help but become amused when the guys all went quiet, realizing what was happening.

Heeseung moved away from the desk a little bit before leaning back in the chair. You removed your face from his neck when he grabbed your hips with both hands, watching with fucked out eyes as he helped you move along his cock.

“Go on, beautiful, let them hear how good Seungies cock makes you feel.” Heeseung groaned as you grabbed his shoulders, desperately trying to find your high.

“Seungie, it feels so good.” You whined out as your head fell back, “I wanna cum please.”

Heeseung’s dick twitched at your whiny voice and he knew he was close, there was no way he could deny you when he was almost there himself. He leaned forward placing harsh kisses along your jugular eliciting more whines from you.

“Cum for me babydoll.” He whispered huskily in your ear and that’s all it took for your orgasm to wash over you, cries of his name falling from your lips like a mantra as he continued to thrust up into you. After a few more harsh thrusts he painted your walls white, a throaty groan leaving his lips against your skin.

After you both came down from your highs you slumped against Heeseung, his cock still buried deep in your cunt. Your warm breath fanning his sweaty neck causes a shiver to go down his spine.

“YO WHAT THE FUCK HEESEUNG?!” Jay cursed at your boyfriend but the older male just chuckled as he rubbed your back soothingly.

“Don’t act like you didn’t enjoy it.” Heeseung teased, causing all of the boys to start shouting different excuses to defend themselves which only further amused your boyfriend.

@alvojake | Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or repost any of my work

𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖈𝖑𝖆𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖗 : ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʀᴇᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴘᴜʀᴇʟʏ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴀᴋᴇɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱʟʏ.

𝖙𝖆𝖌𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙: @heesitation @riftanswhore @luvyong2z

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a-b-riddle · 2 months

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A Simple (Mis) Understanding Chapter Two: Numbness & Pain

Daisy

I always used to think it was an exaggeration of how pregnancy is a constant state of exhaustion. But it was a lot of work growing a tiny human. Add in the fact that I'm still working 40 + hours a week and, of course, something is always causing some sort of discomfort or pain.

Swollen feet, back pain, nausea; I can't even find any solace in sleep. The 32 week mark felt so close, yet still so far. Another eight or so weeks of this seems like a drop in the bucket compared to how far along I am, but still. That still another two months. So far away when you want to be done, but still too short compared to everything I still have yet to do.

Another two months to set up a crib and wash her new clothes. Another two months to figure out a name and make decisions that I always envisioned making with a partner. Another two months of struggling to do things like picking up shit off the floor or staying on my feet long enough to make a decent meal.

But right now, I wasn't worried about the two months ahead of me and all the things I still have to do. Right now, I was looking forward to a three day undisturbed weekend. The pain in my feet and sciatica was becoming so bad, I had taken Friday off to see a doctor and spend the rest of the weekend doing nothing, but sitting in my modest little house and watching mind rotting television. I might even indulge in some spicy reading. Heaven knows its been too long.

Or at least, it hasn't been since them. That day in the office, but... that really didn't count. I often wrestled with myself about it. That one time erased any feelings I had for any of them. But I felt a bit pathetic how it now tainted every good memory I had with them. Kyle bringing me something to snack on when he realized I hadn't gone to the mess hall. Price always having a cup of earl grey tea cooling for me first thing in the morning. Two packs of zero calorie sweetner and a bit of honey.

Sweet like you.

I couldn't stand the smell of it now. I blamed it on the hormones. A lot of things made me queasy, but something about the smell of the bergamot, made me sick in a completely different way. A feeling not of nausea, but of... fear. Like the same way a pentagram could summon demons, earl grey could summon mine. As if John Price was somehow there any time the scent lingered in the air.

But he wasn't. None of them were. Fuck. Why did my thoughts always go back to them at some point? No. This was going to be a relaxing weekend god dammit. Fuck them.

Almost angrily, I hit the garage key fob, shutting the door and engulfing me into darkness; a thin line of light leaking through the bottom of the garage door. When I had opened my door, I could at least see a path to my mudroom. I grabbed my purse, ready to go in, when I felt it.

Hundreds of needles. Stabbing and digging into my feet. Not just the soles, but the entire fucking foot the moment I bared any weight on them. I pulled off my flats and it was then I noticed how angry they looked. Red and swollen and all but screaming at me to sit my fat ass back down. I wiggled my toes, trying to get some blood flow. Fuck. Why didn't they hurt while I was driving?

I manage to get onto my feet, using the car door as support. Steading myself until I was ready to take the first step. By the time I had managed to all but crawl inside, ten minutes had passed since my initial arrival time. I got off at 5:00, but usually didn't log off until almost 6:00. Granted, I work from home, but I had run out of a few essentials. Essentials now that were in the boot of my car.

Fuck.

10 minutes won't hurt. Not like there is any thing frozen. Speaking of which, I forgot my ice cream... dammit. I really need to start keeping a list on the fridge. It's hard to remember when pregnancy brain (or stomach) takes over and I slam a container in a single sitting.

Grabbing a pillow from the couch, I went to the kitchen. Which considering the town house, or terraced housing I suppose now, was perfect for a single and expecting Omega it was cozy. Not like the base where going from the common area to the chow hall was about a three minute stroll.

I get down and lay on my back. Carefully maneuvering so my ass rests against the cabinets before I hook the back of my heels unto the counter top so I could rest my feet a bit. Not the most sanitary, but it wasn't like I had guests. It was just me. For now.

It took a few moments to adjust. My back ached against the hardwood, but I could already feel the relief from my feet and legs. It wasn't all that shocking that I was having a hard time with them. I had gained a considerable amount of weight during my pregnancy. When I had brought it up to the OBGYN about possibly cutting back on food, her suggestion was to simply not weigh myself at home. Now when I went in for a visit they made me turn around before taking my weight.

It was hard. I've always had a problem with how I looked and now adding pregnancy then taking away the option to diet and exercise didn't exactly help.

I pulled out my phone and was preparing to open my kindle app when I saw a tiny red bar in the top right corner of my phone. Of course. I get nice and settled and my phone is on 2 fucking percent. Whatever. I tell Alexa to set an a timer for fifteen minutes and take a little nap. Maybe meditate.

A knock on the door quickly brings any possibility of relaxation to a pause. Margaret next door was dropping off Winnie off early to go to her book club. Margaret was a widow and a recent empty nester. She had spent her life as a mother and a homemaker. When I got custody of Winnie two months ago, she had quickly stepped up in helping me with everything from child rearing to managing my pregnancy.

"Hello, Maggie!" I greeted from the floor. "Hello, Winnie Darling." Winnie had the same sand colored hair as me and bright green eyes. Her face was a shade of red and I could smell her from the entryway. Someone would need a bath today. Fantastic.

"Oh, Dear!" Maggie fussed, setting Winnie down on her feet before coming over to me. "Are you alright?" Winnie didn't bother stopping to hug me like she normally would before making a beeline toward the potty. She usually was a creature of habit, but nature calls I suppose.

"Feet are a bit swollen." I waved off. "Just resting them a bit."

"I don't have to go tonight." She set her bag down. A deep green corduroy shoulder bag that always had just what you needed in it. A wet wipe, hand sanitizer, a spare tissue and even a stain pen when a spill happened at the most inconvenient time. "I'll stay and-"

"Maggie." I said, trying my best to sound at firm, but it was hard with her. No one told Maggie 'no'. "It's alright. Just a bit of water retention. Nothing to fret over." And it wasn't. I could already feel the pain from earlier subside.

"Really, it's no bother." She argued, bending over to unstrap one of her shoes. "It's a bloody stupid book anyway. I just go for the gossip really."

"Maggie." I tried again. "Really." "It's getting close to the due date and I don't want to burn out on me just yet." It was a lie. Even with her greying hair, a deepened laugh line, Maggie didn't burn out. She was one of the few Omegas I had met in my life and she could run circles around any of them, myself included.

The sound of flushing sounded from the bathroom followed by the faucet. She huffed before slipping her shoe back on. "If you insist."

"I do." I encouraged. As much as I loved having Maggie's help, I hated feeling like a burden. She had raised her children. It was time for her to do things for herself. "Besides, we'll see you tomorrow after my appointment tomorrow." The bathroom door clicked open, revealing my little Win with the front of her smock covered in water. Fantastic.

"Hi, Mommy." Winnie finally greeted. Her freshly washed hands dripping water droplets onto the hardwood. "What are you doing?"

"My feet hurt so I'm just letting them rest." I explained, looking up at her. Winnie was rambunctious as most four-year-olds without a sense of self preservation are, but when I explained to her how careful she had to be now that I had her sister in my belly, her nature had become more gentle.

It worried me as much as it warmed my heart.

"Why don't you sit on the couch?" She asked. Her head tilting to the side, face etched as if she were trying to figure out my reasoning.

"Because it helps when you lift your feet up high in the sky, Winnie Pooh." Maggie explained before looking back at me. "Well if you're sure-"

"I am. Go." I urged. "We'll see you tomorrow. Lunch around noon?" Spending time with Maggie didn't make me feel like such a parasite when I knew she enjoyed the company. Her children had all moved away, only one staying in the UK. She wasn't so alone, but neither was I.

"Wouldn't miss it." She gave a soft smile. The laugh lines around her face deepening. "See you tomorrow, Dearies." She said, retreating back outside. The soft sound of the door clicking behind her.

Winnie had laid down beside me. Yep. Definitely going to need a bath tonight. "How was school today?" Winnie went to a pre-school that was luckily covered under my insurance. Perks of being an Omega. I'll take it where and when I can.

She talked about going to the playground and painting. All the usual bits. Who she played with and new things she learned. Then came the question. A question she had asked before in passing. A subject I changed with ease before. 'Have you brushed your teeth? How about another episode of Bluey? Put on your trainers (because we can't just say tennis shoes anymore) and we'll go for a walk to the park. I had skirted around the question with ease.

"Why don't you have a mate if you have a baby?" Winnie was too young to get the answers to a lot of life's difficult questions. Why did Tiffany not like us? Why didn't she get to see her daddy anymore? Why did that man look at you weird on the train, mommy? I wish she would just stay this little. That she never needed or want to know the harsh truths about me, us.

"I..." I wracked my brain for an answer and just came up short. I couldn't think of a way to sugarcoat it. We almost had a mate. Mates. We almost had a pack that would have walked you to school on the mornings my feet were too sore or I was already running late. They would have loved you. "It... it's complicated, Darling." Is what I chose instead. The other worrisome fact is that Winnie was too young to understand the concept about mates. I had never broached the subject which only means she probably heard it from some little shithead at school.

Wonderful.

"I'll explain it when you're older." I promise, closing my eyes and letting her snuggle into the crook of my arm. "Do you wanna rest your eyes with me?"

"Like when I'm five?" She asks putting one of her hands underneath my shirt onto my belly. It had become a thing she had started since I told her about the baby.

"Maybe six." I said, looking down at her. She gave a yawn before closing her eyes.

"I think five is better."

"Okay, Win." I said. "When you're five we'll talk about it." It was a promise I hoped she would forget. But I didn't want to negotiate with a four-year-old about something future me could deal with. I wanted just 15 minutes of this. I order Alexa to set a timer to make sure we haven't dozed too far off. Winnie still needed to shower and eat. I still needed to get the groceries out of the car. But I could spare another 15 minutes.

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devildomwriter · 7 months

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Some of the Wildest MC Options Vol One

“Is that you, God?” — to Leviathan 2-8

“Shut up, demon.” — to Mammon 2-12

“Shake, doggy! Shake!” — to Luke 2-15

“Are you missing a few brain cells?” — to Mammon 2-12 Hard

“Get off your ass and come to the door!” — to Leviathan 3-7

“To eat me…?” — to Leviathan 4-5

“You’re damn straight you will.” — to Leviathan 4-6

“What do you say we sleep together Lucifer?” — to Lucifer 8-6

“Do you remember being stabbed?” — 11-17

“Dammit Mammon, come on!” — to Mammon 14-1

“Mammon, break down the door.” — to Mammon 14-4

“Whose coffin is this?” — to 14-10

“Are you Diavolo’s puppet?” — to Lucifer 15-4

“We pick a fight with Diavolo.” — to 15-10

“How can you be so dense?!” — to Diavolo 15-14

“If I end up dead, I’m totally going to haunt you.” — to everyone 15-14

“Whatever. It’s vomit, time, Beel!” — to Beelzebub 17-2

“I had my minions do some part-time work for me.” — to Belphegor 17-7

“I’ll DIE before I talk…!” — to Belphegor 17-17

“He’d do anything for his darling Lucifer now.” — to Belphegor about Satan 17-20

“Kneel before me.” — to Belphegor and Satan 17-20

“Waiter, bring me everything on the menu!” — 18-12

#obey me thanks #obey me mc #mc picking fights with demons #mc trying to sleep with Lucifer #mc making Beel vomit #mc is wild #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me diavolo #obey me mammon #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me satan #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me belphegor #obey me beelzebub #obey me luke #obey me barbatos

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rookthorne · 1 year

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⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐝

Time was irrelevant when it came to Bucky — he was gravity, and you were helplessly pulled to him like a moth to a flame. When it finally came time to collect your car from his garage, you walked away with much more than just your keys.

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 ✯ Mechanic!Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 ✯ 3.2k

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 ✯ Fluff, extreme spicy tension, there are special additions and appearances

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒂𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆 ✯ I couldn't leave him alone, and he's such a smug bastard.

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎 ✯ Ride on Josephine by George Thorogood & The Destroyers

჻჻჻჻჻჻჻჻ 𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒂 ✯ @smutconnoisseur

𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

It was funny how fate worked. Yesterday, you were cursing to the high heavens that your bucket-of-bolts car wouldn’t survive the drive home. This morning, you were counting your blessings for the fact that your car chose that moment to come to a stop outside of Barnes Classics Restoration.

All night – you had stayed up almost all damn night on the phone with the broody, muscled, tattooed mechanic that had stolen your breath away. It started with texts – innocent enough, but then Bucky drove home and called you. You hesitated briefly before you recklessly swiped to answer his call, then… Well, it was all downhill from there.

For hours you got to know him, and he got to know you – his attention was addictive, not to mention the way his voice lowered every time he’d congratulate you on an achievement or how happy Bucky sounded when he talked about his career and fame in the collector’s industry.

“I best be gettin’ some shut eye, doll–need to be up bright and early to finish up your car before I come ‘n get you,” Bucky said, voice raspy from hours of talking, and it was two in the morning. “You sleep well, sweetheart. I’ll see you-” A pause; you suspected he was checking the time, “Well, I’ll see you in a few hours.” The breathy chuckle that left his lips and echoed in the speaker made your heart flutter.

You would do anything to hear it again.

“Sleep well, handsome,” you whispered, stifling a yawn. “I’ll see you bright and early in the morning.”

“Night, doll.”

The line clicked, and you sighed heavily, willing the pounding of your heart to calm. No good would come of falling too quickly, you knew this, but dammit all; you couldn’t help but feel attached to Bucky’s charm and swagger.

All too soon, the sun rose, and you with it. Excitement made you feel like you were vibrating out of your skin, the single good morning text from ‘Handsome’ saying a simple: “I’m on my way, sweetheart,” set the butterflies in your stomach aflame. You dressed nicely, casually – but nice, a flattering outfit and one of your favourites.

With your house tidied after breakfast, you moved to the couch, your knee bouncing in anticipation to hear the rumbling engine of Bucky’s car down the street – when you heard something. It wasn’t the Mustang you had fawned over yesterday, but it was similar. It cut out before you could ponder it further, and you heard footsteps up the path to your front door, then two solid knocks against the wood.

“Hey, doll, it’s me!” Bucky called, muffled by the barrier. Your stomach swooped, and you rushed to the door, pausing briefly to adjust your shirt. Deep breath, you intoned, filling your tightening lungs and exhaling.

The door flew open, and low and behold, Bucky stood on your doorstep – hair loose and falling to his shoulders, a black Henley with rolled up sleeves to show off the artistry gracing his forearms and hands, and the kind of jeans that made you praise the heavens for thighs like his. “Hey,” you managed, not in a squeak if you did say so yourself.

“Hey back,” Bucky smirked, allowing a glance up and down your figure. “You look beautiful.”

“This?” You glanced down at your casual fit, the compliment making the disconnect between your brain and mouth all the more obvious. “Um, t-thanks.”

“C’mon,” Bucky said, offering his elbow and tilting his head. “Your chariot awaits.”

Careful to lock the door behind you, you made your way arm in arm with Bucky down the steps and down the footpath when you finally tore your eyes from him to look at the Mustang in all her glory – only, it wasn’t the Mustang.

“What the-”

Bucky chuckled and gestured to the black as night Dodge Challenger parked at the curb. “This is my other baby,” he said, grinning like a fool. “I decided it was time you met her, and since you had such an adorable reaction to my Mustang–” You stood there, gaping like a fish out of water at the power before you, and like with the Mustang, you came to a halt and planted your feet, glancing between him and the Challenger. “Oh my god, you’re so fuckin’ cute, doll,” he purred.

“Cute?” You squeaked, what you wouldn’t give for the ground to swallow you whole – both your being and the cacophony of butterflies in your stomach at being called cute.

“Yeah, y’are, sweetheart.” Slowly, you took a few steps closer to him, and he threw an arm over your shoulder, pulling you close and taking the opportunity to say against the crown of your head, “So fuckin’ adorable, baby.”

“Oh, my god,” you muttered. You knew there was a pull to him the moment he smiled at you the day before, but hearing all this from his lips now? It took all of your restraint to not fall to the floor in a swoon – that would only inflate his ego, you thought.

A chirp sounded from the Challenger, and Bucky opened the door, urging you inside. “M’lady.”

“Such a charmer,” you said before the door closed, and you watched as Bucky laughed and strode to the driver’s side, slipping inside in one fluid moment.

Once Bucky was settled in his seat and had the shifter in hand, he turned to you with a brow raised, a quirk in his lips that widened to be predatory. “I live to please.” The air in the car was sucked out with the statement, and you floundered, scrambling for a retort, but Bucky beat you. “Now, hold on.” The car rumbled to life with a roar, and you gripped the door handle and glovebox like a lifeline.

While not entirely unexpected, the drive to Bucky’s garage was filled with a lot of tire smoke and Bucky laughing at your iron grip on whatever you could scramble to grab hold of.

“That was too much, Bucky!” You gasped, swinging open the door and heaving for breath. “Too much, holy shit.”

“Nah, you can take it, doll,” Bucky replied, materialising out of nowhere next to you and offering his hand to help you out of the car – such a gentleman, even after scaring me half to death, you shrewdly thought. “C’mon, come inside, and you can meet the gang of idiots I have workin’ for me.”

Solid ground under your feet steadied the wave of adrenaline from Bucky’s antics. You followed close behind him as he walked – strutted into his garage office, only there was a red-headed woman with a wicked smile and watchful eyes perched in his chair.

She surveyed you, a critical gaze that morphed into a smirk of mischief before she glanced at Bucky. “What’s got you in so early, Barnes?” The chair creaked as she sat up, raising a brow. “And no coffee?”

“Get your own, Nat,” Bucky scoffed. He paused and looked between you and Nat. She looked expectant, with a quirk to her lips that only grew. “Doll, this is Nat–she’s the one that pulls these fools into line when I’m not here.”

You offered your name shyly, and she grinned at you, rising from the chair to reveal grease stained jeans and combat boots. “Nice to meet you. It’s not often Buck here is in at this hour–maybe you’re changing him for the better, huh?”

“I don’t-”

“Fuck off, Nat,” Bucky cut in, rolling his eyes. You glanced at him, but he refused to meet your gaze, and you swore he was fighting the urge to hide behind his curtain of hair. “Get back to work.”

Nat just winked and walked into the garage, her flaming hair bright amongst the colours of parked cars.

“So,” Bucky said, clearing his throat. “That’s Nat.” The quiet chuckle left your lips before you could stop it, and Bucky moved towards the desk to place his keys down. “D’you wanna meet the other idiots?”

“Why not,” you replied, grinning. “I like Nat; she’s feisty.”

“Not you, too,” Bucky groaned, staring at you with an exasperated frown. “I get enough shit from her as it is, do not join her side–you’re meant to be on my side.”

“Oh, there are sides?” Bucky only narrowed his eyes, suspicion plain as day on his rugged features. “Alright, I yield,” you rushed placatingly. “I’m on your side, Handsome, okay?”

Bucky stepped closer, and you suppressed the urge to shudder or move out of his shadow and away from that piercing gaze. “That’s my girl, now c’mon.”

The garage was bustling with activity as Bucky led you through the door. Quiet indistinct conversations could be heard over the lull of music from the overhead speakers, as well as the whirring of power tools and the sounds of metal on metal. It was strangely comforting, a hive of activity where things were working like a well oiled machine – which, you supposed, was natural.

“Steve,” Bucky called, and you watched a mess of blond hair peer around a popped bonnet – immediately, you recognised him as the blond you first saw yesterday. “Come meet our new client.”

“Ah, the sweetheart that had you showing off yesterday,” Steve replied, wiping his hands on a rag and walking over. “Good to meet you, honey.” His smile was soft, and his eyes flashed with the same mischief as Nat’s. “You can call me Stevie, and Buck here has had me slaving away over your car-”

“Rogers,” Bucky snapped, shoving at his shoulder, and Steve laughed. “Shut the fuck up.”

“I thought you were working on my car?” You piped up, raising a brow at Bucky, who in turn frowned at Steve.

“I asked this punk for one damn minute of help, and he suddenly thinks he’s God’s gift to me.” You stared between the two men squaring their shoulders, an unspoken threat to whoop one another’s asses, playfully, you hoped.

Steve started to walk backwards towards the front of the car he was working on, a smirk on his lips as he pulled the rag from his belt. “But I thought I was.”

“Smug bastard,” Bucky muttered, loud enough so only you would hear, and you laughed. “Alright, enough of that.” You followed Bucky as he walked to another area of the garage, another bay where another classic car was parked, the bonnet up, and a pair of boots visible from the undercarriage. “Carter, get your ass up.”

“Gimme a minute, Buck,” Carter called, his voice muffled by the car. “Just gotta, damn-” A clink of metal on concrete made Bucky sigh. “Shuddup,” Carter said.

You were distracted by Bucky crossing his arms over his chest, the tattoos on his arms bright under the downlights hanging from the ceiling, and the muscles of his biceps flexed as he fidgeted. There were smaller tattoos amidst the bigger designs – scripture and patterns that entranced you, and you tampered down the urge to trace them with a finger, only just. “See somethin’ you like, sweetheart?”

Startled, you looked up from his arms to his face. A smug smirk pulled at the corner of his lips, and he raised a brow.

“Sorry,” you blurted, hastily looking down at your feet, wishing the ground would open up and swallow you whole. “I-”

“I don’t mind,” Bucky said, pulling your attention to his face again, that smirk forming into a grin, and he winked. “Just don’t let those thoughts get to your head, doll. I wouldn’t want to have to bring you back down to earth again–at least,” Bucky had moved closer, close enough to whisper against your ear under the guise of looking at the tools scattered on the tray next to you. “Not here.”

“Oh,” you breathed before you thought better of it, and you clamped your mouth shut with a loud click.

Bucky chuckled, shaking his head. The boots that belonged to Carter finally moved, and a man, uncannily similar to Bucky, appeared on a wheelie board before he rose to his feet with a groan. “Almost finished with this one,” he said, looking at Bucky, who nodded before Carter turned to look at you. He was handsome, with a charming smile and bright eyes. “Now, who’s this pretty darlin’?”

You didn’t miss the way Bucky stiffened next to you, his smile becoming forced, and neither did Carter – his eyes drifted to Bucky, and he raised a brow and his hands in teasing placation. “This is our new client, Hal,” Bucky said, his tone only slightly clipped as he said your name. “She’s here to pick up her car.”

“Ah, so you’re the-”

“Yeah, she’s the one I was showing off for,” Bucky cut in, and Hal chuckled. “I already heard that from Stevie. Now,” Bucky paused, narrowing his eyes at the engine bay. “Get that pigsty cleaned up.”

“Buck- C’mon, I was playin’!” Hal huffed, deflating under Bucky’s stare. “Alright, alright, easy, tiger.” Hal looked at you and smiled, his eyes softening. “Good to meet you, sugar. I’m sure we’ll see each other more if Buck is this damn protective-”

Bucky uncrossed his arms and advanced, but Hal danced out of his reach with a cackle, his southern twang making it sound like a whoop.

“What is it with these idiots,” Bucky said as he rested a hand on your lower back to guide you away from a laughing Hal. “I swear-”

“They’re amazing,” you interrupted, laughing at Bucky’s incredulous stare. “They’re making me realise that you’re not all that ‘big tough guy’, and that you’re just a big softie!”

“I am not-” Bucky huffed. His lip suddenly curled in another predatory smirk, and you gulped as Bucky slowed his pace and leant down, his breath hot on your ear. “I can be big and hard, y’know, just for you, sweetheart.”

“Bucky!”

His laughter rang around the garage, and his shoulders shook as you stared at him, shock and astonishment switching your brain into betraying you by helping you picture exactly what he inferred. “You’re so cute when you’re flustered,” Bucky chuckled, throwing an arm around your shoulder.

You followed numbly as he directed you toward a group of men, all of who were hovering at a rack of tools as they talked.

“Fellas,” Bucky called, and all three of them looked over, eyes moving from Bucky to you. You smiled as Bucky introduced you to them, offering your name while your mind still reeled from that damned comment that left your stomach in your throat. “This is Chris,” Bucky said, pointing at a man dressed in a denim jacket, his hair buzzed short and a goatee. “He’s broodier than me, and that’s sayin’ something.” Chris glared at Bucky but softened his gaze as he looked at you.

“Nice to meet you, sweetheart,” Chris said, backing away and turning with a salute.

“Don’t mind him,” Bucky continued. “And this is Ari,” he said, gesturing to a giant of a man with blond hair – just like Steve’s and a kind smile.

“Hey there, honey,” Ari winked. “Buck here hasn’t shut up about you.”

“Goddammit,” Bucky groaned. “What is with you guys? I have one girl I show off to, and here the lot of you are-”

“Easy, boss,” Ari laughed. “Just telling her what you’re too afraid to admit, bein’ big and tough, an’ all.” He flipped a wrench in his hand and sauntered off, grinning like the cat that caught the mouse.

“Don’t listen to them, boss,” the final man said. He looked young – bright and bouncing on the balls of his feet with energy. “I’m Peter,” he offered, smiling widely. “I’m the apprentice.”

“Yeah, and the only one that has the sense not to be a shithead,” Bucky cut in, rubbing his face. “I still have the sway to intimidate you into behaving around finer company.”

“Good to meet you, Peter,” you smiled, shaking his hand. He didn’t hang around long before he rushed off after Ari. The moment of peace was a blessing, and you took the opportunity to look Bucky over – his cheeks were tinged pink, and he kept fidgeting, his hands unable to be still. “You okay, Handsome?”

Bucky looked at you and sighed, nodding. “I knew they were bastards, the lot of them, but damn them.”

You laughed and took his arm. “Take me to me hunk-a-junk, Buck,” you said, shaking it a little. “Then I can get out of your hair, and you can beat some sense into those rascals.”

“Bastards, you mean, doll,” Bucky sighed, grabbing your hand. “Alright, let’s see about your bucket o’ bolts.”

The office was empty when the two of you walked in, and Bucky gestured to a comfortable looking chair. “Sit down for me. I’ll get the paperwork and shit ready,” he said, smiling as you took it. “Good girl.”

“Why are you like this?” You whined, hiding your face in your hands.

“Like what, sweetheart?” Bucky hummed, rooting around in a filing cabinet before pulling out a sheet of paper with a flourish. He turned to look at you and leant against the desk, his body far too close to yours as he handed you the paperwork detailing the work done on your car. “Jus’ tryin’ to be sweet on you.”

Groaning with embarrassment, you glanced down the list, only to find no price written – not for parts, nor labour. “Buck, you missed-”

“I didn’t miss a thing, doll,” he mused, smiling softly down at you – the fondness in his eyes made your stomach flip.

“But I can’t accept this,” you rushed, pointing at the paperwork. “I can’t-”

Bucky shook his head once. “You’ll accept it because you’ll do as you’re told,” he said abruptly, and your mouth fell slack. He chuckled quietly and shook his head again. “Forgive me, sweetheart, I dunno about you, but I enjoy your company–probably more than I should. And- No, let me finish,” Bucky held up a hand to stop you from speaking. Disbelief was flooding you, drowning you the more he spoke. “I wanna explore whatever this is between us.”

“Bucky, oh my god,” you breathed. “Are you-” You gulped and cleared your throat. Dreaming – you had to be dreaming. “Are you asking me out?”

He just nodded, his gaze intense, unwavering. You fell back in your chair, staring at him with the sensibilities of a fish out of water. Silence echoed in the room, and you struggled to find words and articulate just how badly you wanted this.

Before you could speak, however, Bucky shifted, his mouth opening to speak, "I thought drinks woulda been a date, sweetheart, but…" He hummed, narrowing his eyes before they widened like a light bulb had gone off in his mind. "I know–be ready for me to take you out Friday night, 8 o'clock sharp."

"Bucky, I-"

"Nope," Bucky sang, the honeyed pull of his words too alluring to ignore. "Be ready at 8 o'clock sharp, sweetheart. Let a fella show a dame a good time."

After lingering for another few unplanned hours, you put the garage in your rear-view mirror when you realised what had just happened. Bucky had asked you out on a date, an actual date, and he was going to pick you up that Friday night, 8 o’clock sharp, with an order to dress comfortably.

There was no fathoming just what he had in store for you, and you found you didn’t mind that one bit – what was wrong with taking a leap of faith?

⠈⠂⠄ 𝐢𝐧𝐛𝐨𝐱 | 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲 | 𝐚𝐨𝟑 ⠄⠂⠁

⠈⠂⠄𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 ⠄⠂⠁

#bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x female reader #bucky x f!reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes oneshot #Charmed #rookthorne's works

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bookshelf-dust · 1 year

Text

the bad shit

billy hargrove x gn!reader

word count: 1,192

warnings: swearing, possible allusions to depression, brief mention of death, a tiny finger injury, comfort

a/n: my brain does not seem to be in a writing mood right now, but i did manage to crank this out. i do enjoy making billy cry, so there’s that. i hope it’s alright! please let me know what you think. i’d really appreciate it. <33

————

Billy’s been fidgety since he woke.

You hear the soft thud of his boots, muffled against the carpet of your bedroom floor. He makes his way towards you and kisses your forehead, knowing you’re probably too sleepy for a real kiss this early.

He doesn’t tell you how badly he needs one—that his hands are shaking with it. Though he doesn’t need to tell you.

You’d heard his alarm clock go off, felt him stay in bed longer than usual, glimpsed him rubbing his face on the way to the bathroom. He hadn’t wanted to get up. Not one bit.

And even though you can feel sleep calling you, feel the way it presses at your eyes, the way the warmth of the bed pulls you in—you sit up.

Billy’s closer to the door now, but he hears you shuffle, and he’s quick to move back to you.

“You need to sleep, baby.”

But your hands are already on his cheeks, and then you’re kissing him, shutting him up and telling him you’re right here. And you’ll be right here when he gets home from work. You’ll be a phone call away if he needs you during his shift.

“I’ll walk you out,” you say, and your tone informs him that there’s no room for arguments.

You hook your fingers in his belt loops as you push off the bed, hoping that this will keep your half-asleep form from slamming into the wall.

You kiss Billy again on the stoop, even if he is berating you for being barefoot in the cold. You watch him walk to the car, catch the way his fingers fumble with the keys, the way he doesn’t even have it in him to slam the door shut.

He waves at you from behind the steering wheel.

“I love you,” you mouth, blowing a kiss. He’s quick to catch it in his hand, gesturing so that he’s tucking it away in his pocket for later. He responds just as he always does, but you can tell he’s still sleepy.

That he’s tired.

————

You aren’t home when Billy gets back to the house. There’s a note on the counter in your sweet scrawl, telling him that you ran out to pick up dinner. Eating at all had completely slipped his mind.

Billy’s just having a day. He’d wanted to stay home but couldn’t, and not only has he been fidgety, unable to focus for want of home, of you, but his thoughts are getting the better of him. They’re suffocating. Telling him he’s not good enough for you, that he’s a waste of time—of your time. That he should’ve died like he was supposed to in that fucking mall.

And he knows it isn’t true. He knows that you loved him before any of that, when he was just being an asshole, when he was just pissed that he’d had to move. And you love him now, even when he has bad days like this.

But his head. His mind. It tells him otherwise. It fights and it claws and it screams at him. And today he is losing that fight, letting his mind yell and tear at him.

Billy tries to distract himself and wash the dishes, but he only gets so far before he drops something and almost breaks it, before he cuts his finger on a knife he put in the damn sink. After that he tries to find a band-aid but spills all of them on the floor, and the first one he opens gets stuck on the wrapper and he can’t use it.

Once he does secure the pink bandage around his pinky, he goes to clean up his mess and hits his head on the counter. He tries to change clothes and trips, gets his belt loop stuck on a drawer handle.

“God fucking dammit.”

After that one he gives up and throws himself on the kitchen floor, choosing a beer with a pull tab rather than a cap for fear he might actually hurt himself and bleed out.

He hears the sound of you locking your car, the door squeaking when you open it, and he knows he should’ve gotten up to help you, but he just couldn’t. He starts to cry.

“Billy? Where’s my baby?”

The sound of your voice causes him to hiccup, and you’re on the floor in front of him in a matter of seconds.

He’s covering his face with his hands, and you know then that the day must’ve gotten the better of him.

“Hey, let me see you. It’s okay, honey, I’m right here.”

Billy looks up at you, lashes clumped together with tears, nose red and lips all swollen. He looks so frustrated with himself, so beat, that you ache for him.

He wishes he was stronger. That he wasn’t breaking down in the middle of the kitchen, but you told him once that it’s okay to have bad days. That you're always going to be there on the worst ones.

He puts the beer down the moment you hold your arms out, crawling into your lap and burying his face in your chest. You don’t care that he’s heavy or that you’re not entirely sure you’re getting any air in your lungs. You care that he’s letting go and that he’s showing you this vulnerable part of himself.

Billy cries, he weeps, against you for what seems like forever. But you don’t mind. You only want him to feel better. You rub his back, play with his hair, anything to soothe him just that little bit.

When he’s finished, when he’s caught his breath, he pulls away. His cheeks are pink and you’re sure he’s berating himself for having just sobbed like that. He’s sitting on his knees, fingers scratching at the freckled skin of his arms. He looks young like this. Lost.

“Was it just a bad day? Or is it the bad shit?”

That is Billy code for I’m spiraling and I need help. For I’m having a hard time and I can’t do it alone. I don’t know how to say it.

You established that little code pretty early on in your relationship, knowing it would be helpful in getting Billy to talk about his feelings with you.

“The bad shit,” he tells you.

“It’s not true,” you say. “Whatever your head is telling you today, it’s not true. Not today, not ever. You gotta say it for me, okay?”

He gives you the barest shake of his head before he pauses and tries to steel himself so that he can do it. He doesn’t want to let you down.

“It’s not true.”

You grin at him. “Right. And you’re a badass. And we’re gonna eat dinner, and then we’re gonna talk it out, and then we will lay down. And maybe I’ll scratch your back for you.”

Billy nods. He hates that his breath catches at that, that the offer brings him pure, unadulterated joy.

“Okay.”

He can do that. He knows he can offer that much.

Because he is a badass. And he can try for you. For himself.

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

tagging: @clovermunson

#savannah’s fics #billy hargrove #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x gn!reader #billy hargrove x gender neutral reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove comfort #billy hargrove fluff

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mingigoo · 1 year

Text

...ramen before you go? choi Jongho (m)

🍜 pairing ⇢ neighbor!Jongho x (fem) reader

this story is based on true events I have actually experienced. (Cat stuck in sauce can, cat stuck behind appliances) but sadly, no Jongho to the rescue. #saucecat

🍜 synopsis ⇢ you thought things couldn’t get worse after finding a cat in the dumpster behind the liquor store, but now here you were, alone in your new apartment, staring at that damn cat that somehow got stuck behind the washing machine. You needed some strong hands….but the minute you met him, you didn’t want him to leave. Do you want some ramen before you go?

🍜 genre/au ⇢ next-door neighbors au, comedy, smut, fluff

🍜 warnings/tags ⇢ 18+ minors DNI, shower sex, completely unhinged and does not make any sense. this is all over the place and just for fun, so please have a good laugh, comedy to smut, oral sex (female receiving), hair pulling, cream-pie, profanity, jongho is the cat savior, and also a little sleepy and drunk off beer

🍜 word count ⇢ 2.8k words

🍜 taglist ⇢ @jjhmk @yesv01 @roe-sinning @meowmeowminnie @yeritheloml @yukine-smx @y00nzin0 @8tinytings @halesandy @shegotboreddsoo @kangyeosangelic @sanshineeeeee @kodzukein @hwaightme @likexaxdaydream @ssaboala @gtr-skyline-lover

ateez masterlist

Your life flashed before your eyes.

Well, your cat’s seventh life, that is.

“I swear to god, I’m gonna go fucking insane.” you hissed. “I literally just found you and you already lost seven out of nine lives.”

You stared at your little troublemaker, the cat you found in the alleyway behind your favorite liquor store in the dumpster. Surely enough, he still caused the same amount of trouble since the very first day you found him.

The situation was even worse, especially because you were four glasses in on your red wine. You barely had enough brain power to comprehend this all.

He stared at you, bug-eyed, through the glass that surrounded his little head—an empty spaghetti sauce glass he had found in the trash can. You were in the middle of moving into this apartment. Boxes were all around you, your furniture not even set up yet, but here your cat was, stuck in a sauce can and sitting there like he did nothing.

For fucks sake carrot I don't have time for this.” you groaned, looking around quickly for paper towels. When you realized you didn't even have utensils out, yet alone paper towels, you let out an aggravated noise and waltzed over to your cat. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

You grabbed onto the glass container, gritting your teeth while pulling it gently.

“Meow.”

“Dude, I'm trying to help you, dammit,” you growled, playing tug of war with Carrot. “Now sit still.”

Carrot, in fact, did not sit still. You let go after the first battle, letting out an irritated sigh before trying again.

After an ungodly amount of time, you were finally able to free the dumpster cat, only for him to look like he’s had war flashbacks.

Covered in spaghetti sauce, Carrot looked like he was bathing in blood. You ran a hand through your hair as the little bitch stared at you like he was gonna screech. After a moment of uncertainty, Carrot licked his sauce-covered lips and waltzed away, still drenched in sauce.

“Come back here!” you yelled, but the more you followed him, the faster he went. You ran through your living room, covered with boxes, and down the hall to where your laundry room was. “I will literally break down right now if you get in that washer. Tears and everything. You better feel bad for me.”

Carrot turned around at those words, but then blissfully stared at the open washer. He had a habit of sleeping in it, and it did cross your invasive mind about how it would clean him up without the use of paper towels.

y/n, that would drown him. Shut the fuck up, brain.

“Carrot.” you swallowed your anger, knowing it was just your stress—and maybe the fact that in the last twenty-four hours, he ate your sandwich out of your hand, sat in the sink while the water was running, started hissing at his own reflection, drank out of your glass of alcohol, and got high of catnip and broke a picture frame. He was cute…too cute. You wished you could get away with his antics. “Don't. Touch. The. washer.”

If a cat could smirk, you were certain that’s just what he did. With one swift movement, Carrot leaped into the washer, rolling around in it in sheer happiness.

Oh, to be a cat.

“You know what? Fine! Roll around, do whatever.” you huffed, tossing your hands up in the air while turning around. As you tried to walk away from the devil himself, you heard a boom, a hiss, and a squeal.

When you looked back at the washer, Carrot was no longer in it. He was nowhere in sight, actually.

“Carrot??” you said anxiously, only hearing a terrified meow, causing you to run over to the machine as quickly as you could.

“MEOW.”

You looked over the washing machine to see bright yellow orbs staring back at you as he moved frantically behind the block of metal. You desperately tried to pull the machine back, only to feel like a goddamn weak ass shrimp.

“I’m trying, I’m trying,” you breathed, groaning as you tried to move it. “Now's the time I am regretting quitting the gym.”

Several minutes pass—you were on the ground sweating like a lunatic. Carrot had gone quiet—he wasn't dead, just probably disappointed in your weak attempt to save his eighth life. He was most definitely shaming the hell out of you by now with his little judgy eyes.

As you thought about asking for help, you knew 911 couldn't save you now. Or ever.

So you did what any sane single woman would do after finding out a man lived across the hall.

You zoomed out the door to knock on his door.

He opened it after a moment, his hair a mess and his eyes all sleepy.

Awe fuck, did you wake him up?

Whatever, it's too late now.

“Um, hello?” he yawned, and as he did, you looked down at your watch to check the time. It was eleven at night, how could you totally lose track of time?

Carrot.

“Hey, listen, um,” you sighed, running a hand through your hair as you noticed how good looking he was. “I need help. Are you strong? You look strong.”

He blinked at you, brown eyes picking apart your expression. His lips were pretty, his eyes were pretty, his arms looked….strong. Mmhhhmm. Yummy.

“I guess so.” he nodded, tilting his head at you. “What do you need?”

“You.” you spewed out, and then laughed at yourself. “Dammit, I mean, yes I do need you, but not like in any other way than your strong arms. I mean that would be nice bit uh..fuck, You seem like a very nice man….”

As you trailed off, it was pure silence, other than the war cries of Carrot in the distance.

“I need you to free my cat from his imprisonment.”

“You need me to do what?”

—

“You couldn't move a washer?”

You and the strong gorgeous man stood in the middle of your laundry room, staring at the machine that held carrot captive. Strong man looked so sexy in his tight little t-shirt and sweats—god, you were so touch-deprived. Here you were creating scenarios in your head with a stranger that involved a washing machine…

“Oh, uh.” you gulped. “We can't all be hercules, man.”

He yawed, causing you to look over in his direction. He looked young, maybe younger than you, with blackish brown hair and glossy eyes. His body looked delish, if you could say so yourself. You would pounce on him right then and there if you could.

“All right, let me move it for you.” the minute he pushed up his sleeves, you swallowed your pride. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—

Within a second, he pulled the heavy machine with ease, letting out a sexy grunt that nearly made you moan. The wine was indeed hitting your slut system, for sure. The minute there was enough space for him to reach down to grab the garbage cat, he pulled him out, holding him far away from him after realizing how dirty he was.

“Carrot!! You’re alive!!”

“Yo, why is he covered in…sauce?” he made a face, turning to you with that gorgeous body of his. “And it’s name is carrot?”

“He was born in a dumpster. Old habits die hard.” You said as a matter of fact my. “And he’s orange. Self-explanatory.”

Muscle man laughed, setting the cat down. “I guess that explains it.”

A few moments of silence. You didn’t like the emptiness.

“….Do you think that’s why he loves the washer?” you wondered out loud. “Like, it looks like a mini dumpster. Probably feels like one too when he rolls around like an idiot.”

The cat savior laughed shyly, but his eyes said otherwise.

“You know,” you pondered as he looked at you as if he were going to tear you apart. “I don't know your name.”

“Jongho,” he mumbled, a smile finally reaching his eyes. He still looked so tired, but you were too selfish to let this opportunity go. “And you?”

“y/n.” you smiled, looking him up and down like a crazy person. “I just moved in.”

“I know.”

“You know?”

“Mhm. Watched you fall down the stairs and play it off earlier. I was gonna help, but you seemed like you would have been embarrassed so…” he started to laugh. “Sorry. I should've helped you.”

You smirked. “Well, you made up for it now.”

You stood close, unaware how close you actually were. He smiled down at you while you looked at his lips.

“I should go…” he hummed, eyes narrowed on you.

“Yeah,” you breathed.

He looked at you lustfully for a moment longer, and then broke away from the trance to walk away. You followed him to the door, but right before he could leave, you blurted out the only thing on your mind.

“Would you…like ramen, you know, before you go?”

He was facing away from you, and as you said those words, he stopped in the middle of the doorframe.

“Depends…” he murmured, turning around to face you. His eyes were no longer sleepy, rather they looked murderous. “Are you…the ramen?”

You nodded.

“Mhm.”

He smirked.

“I guess I can eat.”

You crossed the distance, tugging on his arm to pull him to you as you slammed the door behind him. You shoved yourself onto him, pressing his body up against the door, lips colliding at the same time.

His hands ravaged your body, moving from your hair, to your face, to your waist, to your ass. He moaned into your mouth causing you to arch your body into him like a cat.

“Wanna move this into the shower? I need a shower.” you breathed against his lips as he kissed you.

“Mhm.” he moaned against your lips, picking you up with that superhuman strength of his. “Where is it?”

“Last door in the hall.” you slurred, his arms holding onto your back and your legs. He held you like you were a feather, hot damn.

He walked blindly towards the bathroom, bumping into the walls and door knobs aggressively. You gripped the back of his head, kissing him like you knew him forever.

You didn't even know him for ten minutes.

This is a new low, y/n. A new low.

Oh well, hot guy trumps embarrassment.

The minute he found the bathroom, you nearly tumbled into the room as he opened the door. He pressed you up against the wall, tugging at your lip with his teeth like an animal.

You slid off of him to turn on the water, sparing no time to undress him like a mannequin. He stood there, a boyish smile on his face as you pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his toned body. He was stunning, my god.

“It must be the beer I drank,” he spoke lustfully. “But damn, you’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Ditto, hercules.” you hummed against his lips as you unbuttoned his jeans, smiling into a kiss. “Now shut the fuck up.”

He undressed. You followed, although he seemed inclined to pull your clothes off himself. He had a goofy smile on his face as he tugged your bra off, making you smile with him.

“So pretty,” he whispered, tugging you back into him with a giggle. You stumbled into the shower, freezing cold water hitting your back and dripping down your head, drenching you from head to toe. You would have cared about the temperature any other time, but you were too focused on sucking this stranger's face. He didn't seem to mind, either.

You tasted the coldness of the water on his lips, your hands running up his bare skin to reach his hair. He moaned into your mouth as he bucked his hips into you, breathing heavily.

“I want you to eat me out.” you moaned as his hands danced at your hips. “That was our deal.”

He smirked, burying his head into your shoulder as the water pounded against you. “You want what?” he pestered, tongue dancing in your mouth as you lost your train of thought. “I didn't hear you.”

You groaned, tossing your head back. “I said I want you to eat me out.”

“Eat what?”

“Me. Out.”

“Me out what?”

You shoved him against the cold tiles of the shower wall, glancing down at that sinister smile of his. “I want you to fuck me with your mouth.”

His hands smoothed your curves, his eyes everywhere on your body. “Alrighty then, no need to get harsh.” he laughed, gaining pleasure from having you repeat those words over and over again. “I heard you the first time.”

He knelt down in the shower, his lips meeting yours immediately. His hands were gripping your thighs, and you couldn't help but admit you liked seeing him, or any man, on their knees for you. His tongue slid through your core, igniting an eternal flame that only he could extinguish. He looked up at you through those long eyelashes of his, and you gripped his head, pulling his hair like your life depended on it.

“Fuck.” you hissed, slamming your head back against the wall. “Don't stop.”

He hummed against you, his hands moving to grab your ass tightly. Every time he moaned it felt like a wave of electricity was flowing through your body—an intoxicating feeling on top of the wine.

He pulled back, even after hearing your command. As he looked up at you from his lowly position, it made you feel like you could rule the world.

“I would like to fuck you, you know, with more than just my mouth.”

You shivered under the coldness of the water—and his touch. “Yes, please. Go right ahead.”

He smirked at your response, standing up and gripping your hips without a word. He then shoved you up against the tiles, positioning himself just right, only to shove himself in like he owned the place. You gasped at his sudden entrance, your walls tightening around his dick.

He pumped into you, holding onto your waist from behind and pressing his other hand against the wall. You moaned as he quickened the pace, and either you were too lost in his trance or the wine added to the feeling, but you were so far gone that you didn't even notice when he picked you up mid stroke, holding you to his body as your back pressed against the wall. He fucked you silly, like he did it a million times before. You couldn't get enough of him, even if you just met him today. He was all you needed.

“Come inside me,” you groaned, your tone serious. His movements slowed at your words, unsure of what to do.

“H-huh?” he continued to pound into you, but he was reaching his high way sooner than he wanted to. “Into you? Are you on the pill?”

“Pfft. yeah. Fuck children,” you shut your mouth, hating yourself for saying that while he was literally inside you. “That sounded bad, jeez. What I’m saying is you can come inside me. Please.”

He laughed at you, but was too focused on finishing that he ignored your craziness. His breaths began to quicken, his hips bucked in shallower movements as he reached his climax. You let out a cry as you felt the warmth of his come coat you from the inside, dripping down your thigh as his head fell onto your shoulder.

Your shaky breaths tangled together, the water slowly feeling colder and colder as you looked at each other.

And then you both laughed.

“I…wow.” Jongho laughed, setting you down slowly so he didn't hurt you.

You quickly reached to turn off the water, not holding back the string of curse words attached to your tongue.

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck. “That was fun.”

He smiled at you, leaning in to kiss your lips, once again like he’s done it before. “It’s nice to um…meet you, y/n. I don't think I ever said that yet. It’s not like I met you twenty minutes ago or anything.”

“I’m hoping you’ll keep coming over to rescue my cat…” he mumbled, a knowing smirk on your face. “And to eat some ramen once in a while. A lot in a while, actually.”

“Mhm. Just knock on the door, I’ll be at your service.”

Still in each other’s arms, you were unsure about your future with the cat savior, but yet, this was just enough. It was strange, but enough.

For now, at least.

“So, is now the right time to tell you I’m ready for round two?”

#choi jongho #jongho comedy #ateez comedy #ateez smut #jongho smut #ateez fic #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #next door neighbor au

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naughtyneganjdm · 1 year

Text

A Trade Off

Summary: Desperate to finally get some sleep, Y/N goes to Joel in hopes of getting some pills to help her.

Characters: Joel Miller & the reader (OC, third person)

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45693934

Warnings: Swearing, smut, cheating, a small amount of coercion, etc.

Notes: I kind of wrote this very quickly this morning. It’s a short little one-shot with no plot really just smut. So I hope you enjoy it. Y/N obviously means your name or whatever name you choose to use.

Exhaustion had become a well-known friend for Y/N these days. To say she was lacking sleep would be an understatement. Between her fear of the infected and FEDRA working her to the bone, she couldn’t shut her brain down to get some sleep. The only form of relief she could get these days was the kind that came in the shape of a pill and she hoped she would be able to get the same thing again.

Heading through the narrow, damp hallways of the apartment building she was in, she was praying that Joel or Tess would be home. The smugglers that were known on the streets to help get you anything that you needed. A few times in the past they had given her samples to test out their stash of medication. Joel more times than Tess. Tess was strict on how much she was willing to hand out, while Joel had been a little more understanding and lenient with her.

Stopping before their door, she knocked once and heard nothing on the other end. Waiting, she knew that she should have just turned around, but she was so tired and she knew that she needed some help. Knocking harder this time, she heard a grumble at the other end followed by the sound of something falling over behind the door.

“Dammit, I’m coming,” Joel’s deep voice rumbled making her thankful to know that he was actually home. She didn’t realize just how desperate she actually was to get some sleep. When the door pulled open, she felt her throat go dry seeing Joel’s dark eyes falling upon her. His arm rest against the doorframe while his other hand clung tightly to the door. “What is it?”

“I’m sorry for bothering you, but I was hoping that you could help me with something,” she whispered looking down the hallways making sure that they were alone. With a grumble, Joel held the door open further for her allowing her into the apartment. Once she entered, she waited at the center of the living room area while Joel limped into the room. With his disheveled appearance, she assumed that meant that he was sleeping when she knocked. “I’ve been having some trouble sleeping lately…”

“We all have trouble sleeping,” Joel scoffed, folding his arms out in front of his chest while he waited to hear directly what it was that she wanted. “What are you looking for?”

“I was hoping to get a few pills to help me sleep,” she pushed her hands into her pockets knowing that she felt she was doing something shady coming to Joel to get medication that only he and Tess were capable of getting.

“Okay, but you have to pay for them. No more freebies,” Joel reached back to caress his fingers over the back of his neck and then up through his messy hair making her nod her head. She knew that was coming. There was only so many free samples that she would be able to get. “How many did you want?”

“I don’t know, ten?” she came up with a random number making Joel’s eyes narrow out at her before nodding. Joel headed into a different room leaving her to herself to eye over the things in their apartment before she cleared her throat. “Where is Tess?”

“She’s on a supply run,” Joel’s southern drawl called out from the other room making her swallow down hard. Joel returned with a bag of something and when he stepped before her she couldn’t help but eye over the ruggedly good looking man that had drawn her eye on more than one occasion. “We’re running low on some things, so she’s out there getting it for us.”

Clearing her throat, she saw Joel hold the bag up and she gave him a nod, “I can’t give you the bag, so whatever you take you have to carry in your pocket.”

“How much are they?” she reached inside her pocket to pull out her ration cards making Joel shrug his shoulders.

“For ten hydro? Fifty rations,” Joel answered hearing her let out an overwhelmed sound when she counted what she had. When she counted it and realized she didn’t have enough, she raised her stare up at him to see Joel shrug.

“I only have forty-five and I still need to eat,” she reasoned with Joel who simply shook his head, his stare cold showing that he wasn’t breaking on the price.

“Forty-five gets you nine,” Joel pointed out with a bob of his head, lowering the bag at his side. “I can’t give you any breaks here Y/N. Tess is paying attention to our inventory here and I can’t be handing out any more samples for you.”

“I thought they were two a piece before,” she thought back to when Tess tried selling her more of the pills in the past and she turned them down knowing that she wanted to save her money to live better, but there would be no living at this point if she didn’t finally sleep.

“Low inventory, price goes up. So they are five a piece now,” Joel declared with another shrug of his shoulders. Y/N was taking her time to try to figure out what she should get and Joel dramatically exhaled. “Listen, are you going to get any or not?”

“I guess I’ll go with five,” she knew how much money she had and knew that she still needed to have enough to make it through her normal life as well. Hopefully with five, it would help reset her system and get her to start sleeping again. Joel started to open the bag before thinking something over and closing the bag back up to put them in his pocket. “What is it?”

“You really want those ten?” Joel pushed making her stand before him, not quite sure how she could even get them to begin with. “I’ll give them to you for thirty-five as long as you do something for me to make up for the rest you don’t have.”

“What could I possibly do for you?” her eyebrow arched in curiosity feeling Joel moving around her and she heard him drop down on the couch behind her. Turning on her heel, her eyebrow arched and she let out a shuddering breath. Joel was looking up at her with his chocolate brown eyes. His right arm draped across the back of the couch, while his left hand laid across the center of his groin almost in a suggestive manner. His eyebrows bounced up and she felt her heartrate quicken. “Are you saying…?”

“I reckon it’s pretty obvious what I’m saying,” Joel’s fingers stretched out enough for him to palm in over the front of his pants.

“What about Tess?” she inquired seeing him sliding further down on the couch, pushing his thighs further apart.

“What about Tess? She’s not here,” Joel pointed out, tossing his hand up for a moment before smirking. “Plus, knowing about Tess didn’t stop you that one night.”

“Oh, so now you’re acknowledging that something happened between us that night?” she threw out there making Joel’s head tip to the side. “Because as far as I was aware, when I woke up in the morning you were gone and you never acted like that night happened.”

“What was there to say? It happened, we went on with our lives,” Joel’s face twisted in contemplation, “and now I want it again.”

“How much do you want exactly?” she inquired making Joel smirk when she folded her arms out in front of her chest.

“How many pills do you want?” Joel’s expression didn’t change much when she thought about the whole situation. “You want your five, you can take your five. You want your ten, I’ll give it to you if you work that mouth of yours and if you want fourteen, well…I’m sure you could figure out a way to persuade me.”

“And when Tess notices that the supply is lower than it should be?” she quipped back making Joel sigh loudly.

“Then I tell Tess I went on a bit of a binge. It wouldn’t be the first time,” Joel grumbled under his breath watching her slowly lowered down to her knees making his dark eyes narrow. Gradually, she moved across the floor moving between his legs. Raising up higher, her palms slid in over his knees before sliding up over the lengths of his thighs making Joel let out a tight breath. “Now make it good…”

“I’m always good,” she claimed with a shake of her head, caressing over his thighs giving them a tight squeeze. Adjusting her body, she slid her right hand up toward the center of his pants. Finding the root to his masculinity, she palmed over his body through the material of his jeans feeling him hardening beneath her touch. Squeezing faintly made a small rumble fall from his throat with his lips parting while she teased him.

“You must really want those pills, don’t you?” Joel watched her fingers slide up toward the button in his pants pulling it open with ease. When her fingertips dragged down the zipper, he lifted his hand up to drag his thumb in over her bottom lip. With a purr, she kissed at the pad of his thumb before taking it between her lips making him grunt. Her tongue lapped at his flesh before pulling her head back with a wet sound.

“It’s not like I’m going to have a problem doing this,” she replied with a slur, working to pull apart the material of his pants. When they were separated enough, she worked her hand into his pants. Arching his hips up, Joel helped her pull his erection from behind the denim prison it was confined in. The way her eyes surveyed over his length sent a chill through his entire body. She looked at it with such awe before her fingers delicately wrapped around his girthy length to take her time to stroke over it. “You have such a beautiful cock.”

Leaning over his lap, she pressed faint kisses at the underside of the tip making Joel hum out in approval. Involuntarily, his hips arched up when her grasp got tighter and she started to pump her hand over the length of his shaft while her tongue dragged out over the tip. Purring out, the taste of him lingered on her tongue. Raising her eyes, she stared out at Joel for a moment longer before grabbing a firm hold of the base of his cock. Taking Joel between her parted lips made a grunt escape him when the warmth of her mouth surrounded him.

This was something she was enjoying. The way her tongue lapped at the ridges of his manhood and the sounds she made drove Joel wild with desire. Between her tongue and the wet kisses she would place at the swollen tip, she had him eager for more. Tangling his fingers into her hair, Joel helped lead her to his length knowing that he wanted a bit more than this teasing she was giving him.

With a proud smirk, she allowed Joel to push her further down his length having his tip hit the back of her throat making her let out a wet sound before pulling back. Joel set a tempo of her head bobbing over his length having her drag her tongue along the underside of his cock with every pull back. Her blowjob was something that he had been thinking about since the first night they had spent together. It was something he never thought he would have again with her, but when the opportunity arose, he couldn’t turn it down.

Closing his eyes and dropping his head back against the couch, Joel couldn’t help but enjoy himself with her pleasuring him. And she was certainly working hard for it making his abdomen tense up. By the sounds she was making while giving him a blowjob, he wondered who was actually enjoying this more. Him…or her. Regardless, he couldn’t help but enjoy getting the time to be pampered upon.

Tightening his grasp in her hair, Joel led her further down his length making her tense up when she took him as far back into her throat as she could. After a few seconds, he loosened his grasp and allowed her to pull back for a breath. When her wet lips pulled from his cock, her fingers still caressed over his body coating him in her saliva before she licked her lips.

Returning to her previous place over his lap, she wrapped her lips around the tip and the way she varied between using her tongue over him and her mouth had him twitching forward, his hand sliding down between her shoulders when his breathing grew louder. He was right on the edge of coming and he knew it. Closing his eyes, his whole body tensed up only for him to let out an unpleasant sound when she pulled her mouth away from him and licked her lips.

“What are you doing?” Joel grumbled looking down at his straining cock. It was solid and eager to get its release that she had stolen from him. Lifting his head, he watched as she pulled open her pants and eagerly tugged the material down her body after kicking out of her shoes. Swallowing down hard, Joel’s eyebrows furrowed when he watched her shimmy out of her panties making him lick his lips.

“Getting something out of this for me too,” she breathed out moving back to the couch to reach for Joel’s pants to tug the material further down his body. They finally dropped at his ankles when she crawled in over his lap. Resting her knees at each side of him, she felt Joel adjusting beneath her with his hands sliding up and over her bare hips.

“So none of that was for you?” Joel muttered, his right eyebrow arching while her fingers worked to open the blue denim shirt that he was wearing. After getting the material separated, she took her time to palm up and over the lengths of his abdomen toward his chest. It made Joel growl out, his Adam’s apple bouncing in his throat when he looked up at her with his dark stare. “It sounded like you were enjoying yourself.”

“Maybe a little bit,” she snickered, biting down into her bottom lip before reaching between the two of them to grab a hold of his solid cock, stroking it a few times to prepare him for her. “Try not to come too fast. I know you were right there when I stopped.”

“I’ll do my best,” he rumbled when she lined the tip of his body up with her already wet entrance. Pleasuring him earlier undoubtedly turned her on with how wet she already was with him. Lowering her hips over his length had her clutching tightly to his shoulders, a whimper falling from her full lips while she took him slowly into her. With her body parting to him, Joel couldn’t help feeling chills while she got adjusted to his size. Clutching tightly to her bare thighs, Joel knew that his grasp was strong enough that it was going to leave a mark on her, but she didn’t seem to care. When he filled her completely, she paused making Joel groan out with her surrounding him. Pushing his fingers up over her sides, he tugged at the material of her shirt and pulled it off to drop it onto the couch beside them. With his hands returning, he caressed up and over her ribcage before cupping her breasts making her purr out and drop her head back. “You’re something else.”

Joel’s rough thumbs circled over her nipples making her shudder against his touch before his head dropped forward to start pressing wet kisses down the side of her neck toward her collarbone. It was more personal than Y/N thought he was willing to go, but she liked it. Sinking her fingers into his hair, she purred out and started to raise her hips up almost all the way to the tip before dropping her hips back down. It made Joel moan out against her flesh sending a chill down her spine. One of Joel’s hands settled at the small of her back while she started to rock her hips over his length. The tip of his tongue circled her nipple before taking it between his lips with a faint sucking motion. The more animated her movements became over him had him letting out winces against her body. Dropping his head back against the back of the couch, his other hand fell to her hips to help her bounce over his length.

“Your big cock feels so good inside of me,” she whimpered out, digging her fingers into his shoulders while she had her way with him. Even exhausted, she found herself absolutely loving this. Being with Joel was addictive and she was eager for each movement she made over him. Having him inside of her was the sweetest stretching full feeling that she could have asked for. “Joel.”

“Fuck…” his moan was faint, but with his eyebrows furrowing and his head tipped down to watch the way his cock disappeared inside of her time and time again, it fueled her. Getting him off would be a present to her. Whether she got five pills or ten, she didn’t care. All that mattered was this moment right here with Joel. For so long she knew that Joel belonged to Tess so she never thought getting to be with him again would even be a possibility for her. Joel’s fingers curled around the side of her neck bringing her forward with a hum. “Come here…”

Joel’s lips covered hers, surprising her and slowing down her movements over him while his lips caressed over hers in the most demanding hungry sweep. The last time they were together, Joel didn’t kiss her so this was sensational for her. It made her body feel like it was on fire with him deep inside of her. The throbbing of Joel’s cock inside of her to his lips claiming her in the most animalistic of ways had the room spinning around her.

“Keep going,” he nipped at her bottom lip, his hands finding their way back to her hips to get her moving over him again. This time he led her over him in strong, swift movements knowing that he was searching for that release she had kept from him previously. Joel’s hips were now meeting her movements, arching up from the couch leaving a smacking sound surround them with each thrust he made beneath her. “Good girl.”

Hearing him praise her like that kickstarted her heart. She liked it. Taking it as encouragement, she started to roll her hips over him harder, her lips hovering over his while she took as much control of the situation as she could. Her cries fell from her lips while Joel watched her facial expressions. He wanted to witness what this was doing to her. It was an arrogance thing, but it turned her on all the more. His lips parted and a muscle at the corner of his jaw flexed.

“Yes,” she kissed him this time finding a fire growing at the pit of her stomach. They were both so close to their breaking points. Joel winced against her lips and she could feel his cock twitching inside of her. The warmth of his release started to fill her. Hot strands of his cum poured out into her making her purr against his mouth. Keeping up with her steady movements, she felt Joel’s tongue press between her lips and it drew a fire throughout her. Even after he came, she was looking for that release herself until she finally got it with her eyes slamming shut tightly. Falling in against Joel, she buried her head against the side of his neck and felt her heart pounding inside of her chest.

Joel’s hand caressed in over her hip before his hand found its way to her bottom. A gasp filled the air after he firmly smacked over her bottom making her arch forward toward him with him still inside of her, “Good girl. Very good girl.”

Licking her lips, she pulled back enough to look between them. Easing her hips up from his length, she watched it smack up against his lower abdomen when it pulled from her. His release slid down her thighs making him smirk when he reached between them to sweep some of it away with his thumb. Reaching up, he dragged his thumb coated in his release over her bottom lip making her purr when she took his finger between her lips cleaning his cum from his finger. It made Joel growl before pulling her down to him to get her to kiss him once more.

With a final firm smack over her bottom, she felt Joel adjusting her over him and moving her next to him on the couch. It took a while for her to gather herself while she watched Joel pulling his pants back up his legs. Her throat went dry watching him push his softening cock back into his pants before buckling them back together. Joel left his shirt open while he walked through the apartment. He went over to the counter to drop out the pills that she had come for.

Shakily reaching for her clothes, she pulled each garment on one by one. Standing on unsteady legs, she headed beside him seeing that he counted out fourteen pills for her and pushed them toward the corner of the counter.

“Thirty-five,” Joel held his hand out watching her smirk and shake her head. Grabbing her ration tickets from her pocket, she counted out what he asked from her and handed them over. Joel shoved the ration tickets into his pocket before glancing over at the pills. “They are all there.”

“So that’s it?” she watched him head over toward the bottle of whiskey that was there to pull the lid from the bottle. Joel’s eyebrow arched in amusement before he took a long swig of the burning liquid. “So I take my pills and leave? We never do this again?”

“I mean, it all depends on what you need next and if you have enough rations to pay for it,” Joel gave her a wink starting to button up his shirt.

“Or if Tess is home,” she pointed out watching Joel tip his head from side to side.

“That too,” Joel agreed biting at his bottom lip before nodding to his door. “Which is for another week or so. So if you think about something you are going to need more of, feel free to come back at any time. I hope you finally get that sleep you were looking for Y/N.”

#Joel Miller #Pedro Pascal #The Last of Us #Joel Miller x reader #Joel Miller fanfiction #Joel Miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller imagine #tlou fanfiction

408 notes · View notes

citrinesparkles · 1 year

Text

take a break

jason todd x gender neural reader. 595 words. notes: requested by the ever-lovely austen anon for my valentine's celebration! so sorry for the wait, love- i don't even want to acknowledge how much trouble this gave me. happy st paddy's for anybody celebrating! warnings: picking at fingernails, reader's stressed out and hangry, i think that's it!

"you're doing it again."

jason's voice gently dragged your attention away from the work you were poring over, bringing it to the fact that you were indeed picking at your nails.

"dammit," you muttered, clenching and unclenching your fists before very pointedly laying your hands on your keyboard. right where you could see them. "thanks, jay."

"mhm."

you and he returned to your peaceful co-existence, sitting on the bed and at the desk respectively, the only consistent sounds the jazz he had playing quietly and the rain hitting the window.

it was peaceful.

or it would have been, had your stomach not been in knots over the tasks staring you in the face. all you wanted to do was turn your computer off, throw your phone in a safe and forget the combination, and curl up into jason's side for the rest of the day.

with a sigh, you threw yourself back into your reading.

you made some progress, the words actually making sense this time- right until your boyfriend sniffled.

such an innocent action. he probably didn't even realize he did it; but you did.

and it threw you out of your rhythm.

you swore under your breath, letting your head fall forwards to thunk against the desk almost childishly.

you felt his eyes on you. "that bad, huh?"

"yes," you groaned into the desk. "that bad."

"maybe-"

"i don't really want advice."

there was the sound of fabric across fabric and the quiet creak of the bed, and then there was a hand on your upper back. "okay."

"i just- i don't want to do this."

"i know."

"i'm tired, i've got a headache, my neck hurts. my eyes hurt. my eyelids hurt. i just want to go to sleep."

he hummed, rubbing small circles in between your shoulder blades.

"i'm so sick of this shit." you took a deep breath, letting it out in a heavy sigh. "alright, what's your genius idea?"

"i wouldn't say ge-"

"jason."

"sorry," he said, grin fully audible. "how about a break to eat?"

"groundbreaking," you said dryly.

"i said i wouldn't call it genius."

you rolled your eyes. "it's not an awful idea, either."

"considering you didn't have breakfast-"

"alright," you groaned. "alright. food."

jason, damn his ass, was right. food did help.

but so did getting to curl up into his side on the couch, far away from both computer and phone, so he wasn't the only one that was right. so there.

now, here, away from the brain-melting screen and despair inducing deadline, with jason- wonderful, caring, genius jason- holding one of your hands loosely in his own against your shoulder, things somehow seemed a lot more manageable.

and his jazz- streaming through one earbud for each of you- was much more "smooth, lovely mood music" than "the very last straw", now.

funny how that worked.

funny how his rhythmic tapping on his thigh and low hum were the sweetest sounds you'd ever heard when you weren't neck-deep in reading.

"i like you a lot more out here," you said dryly, squeezing his hand.

"out here, or after food?"

"...no comment."

he chuckled, resting his head against his. "i'd see through it anyway."

"cocky."

"observant," he said playfully, "and therefore confident."

"confident, cocky, potato, potahto."

"only if potato is justified and potahto is not."

you huffed out a laugh despite yourself, rolling your eyes. "oh, shut up. i'm listening to art."

he made a zipping motion over his lips, and you snuggled further into his side.

your work could wait a little while longer.

#citrine writes #being me is just one big game of 'lemme go search my masterlist and make sure i didn't already use that title'#boy. i am rusty. hope this lives up to your hopes aussie my beloved!#jason todd #dc #dc imagine #jason todd x y/n #jason todd x reader #jason todd imagine #imagines #gn reader #dc comics #dc comics imagine

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nixie-writes-aot · 1 year

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Hello, fren!! Hope you're doing well! Might I be able to request Reiner, Bertholdt, and Levi (individually) w a male reader who doesn't sleep all that well due to tinnitus/insomnia?

i am once again requesting based off of personal things, hdnfkkfnd. reader, to me, is their own lil character and each different fic w a reader is different frome each other and their all lil wet pathetic meow meows /aff

Insomniac S/O Drabble

Warnings: insomnia, mentions of death, canon divergent in Bertholdt's, fluff

Pairings: Reiner Braun x male reader, Bertholdt Hoover x male reader, Levi Ackerman x male reader

Author's Note: I never know where to put this section but I went with insomnia because I have no clue how tinnitus functions hkdndk also fren look at him in that gif. That's my favorite gif right there jdnsj

Word Count: 863

Reiner Braun

You stared up at the ceiling in the dark, frustration settling into your bones. You had been trying for hours to sleep, trying your best not to toss and turn. Lest you wake up the blonde beside you. You let out a quiet sigh, turning grumpily onto your back, eyes glaring at the wall beside the bed. Your eyes had adjusted to the darkness hours ago, despite how you felt about even still being awake in the first place. You began to let your thoughts wander from the exhaustion that wore you down and to the events of the day.

Dammit, with how active you had been there was no right to be this unable to sleep. It annoyed you, to say the least. You closed your eyes, silently pleading with your brain to just shut up and drift off. All in vain, of course. Why wouldn't it be?

You felt Reiner shift beside you, two strong arms wrapping around your torso and pulling you into his chest. He pressed his lips against your neck with a hum.

"Can't sleep?" He quietly asked.

You only nodded, feeling your cheeks flush as you heard that deep rumbling chuckle in your ear. "Me either." Reiner admitted, "Might as well stay up together. Right?"

You smiled softly, "Right." You whispered, melting into his warm embrace. Reiner knew what he was doing, evidently, because before long the both of you were drifting to sleep.

Bertholdt Hoover

Unlike you, Bertholdt didn't really struggle to go to sleep but rather struggled with restful sleep. You and him alike had very few nights where the two of you were able to sleep at the same time. Especially after he had returned to Marley with you in tow. Yet every night he tried. His arms wrapped around your, your head on his chest and listening to his heartbeat. Yet sleep wasn't coming, not easily anyway. Even as you listened to the gentle and steady thumping of Bertholdt's heartbeat paired with his quiet, barely audible snores.

It was cute, really. You pressed a hand against his cheek gently, smiling. "I love you." You softly whispered.

Bertholdt's heartbeat fastened, cracking a shy smile. You gasped, playfully hitting his chest. "Oh you weren't even asleep! Liar!" You growled in mock offense.

His pale green eyes opened, falling on your figure. "Mm, no. Can't sleep either. I just didn't want to get in the way of you sleeping, if you were."

"At least this way we can stay up together then." You offered, watching Bertholdt's face heat up. No matter how long you had been dating him, he would always flush at the most beautifully domestic words that you uttered. You laid your head back down on his chest feeling Bertholdt start to run his hands through your hair with a quiet hum. Despite yourself, you ended up drifting off to sleep in his arms, feeling his hands still before you were out like a light. You suspected that Bertholdt had followed suit shortly after.

Levi Ackerman

Levi did not sleep often nor did he sleep well. His dreams normally came paired with nightmares from hell, you were in a similar boat. Although, you supposed that issues sleeping just came with the territory of being scouts. Especially Levi, at the very least you didn't have to send scouts, many of them baby faced and young, to their deaths. You wanted to hold him close most days, because of that. If anyone deserved to sleep well, it was Humanities' Strongest. A title he earned yet a title that came with far too many ghosts.

Which was what you and Levi were doing now. It was after an expedition, his head in your lap as you ran your fingers through his black hair. It was a quiet, gentle moment. Exhaustion wore on the both of you yet not only would sleep not be coming but, additionally, you knew far too well what would happen within your dreams.

You were a veteran yourself, even if you didn't command your own squad like Levi, Miche, and Hanji. You knew his pain. You knew that what others claimed him to be just wasn't true. Sure, he seemed rude and uncaring but you had yet to actually meet a man who cared more than Levi. Levi was quiet, simply enjoying your company and you his. Levi looked up at you, studying your face for a few moments.

"You look exhausted." You remarked.

"Tch, speak for yourself brat." Levi retorted.

You chuckled, nodding. "You got that one right." You watched Levi close his eyes. The silence was comfortable, natural even. It always was around Levi. You didn't need words to express your love for the man before you. Considering his distaste of being emotional, you had a feeling he preferred your silence communicating how you felt for you. Like after every expedition, you two would stay up until you passed out, taking advantage of the planned day off to do with whatever the hell you wanted. Normally, that meant making up for sleep that the night following a return from an expedition stole away. Tonight would be no different.

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syn4k · 9 months

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Doc chronic ilness/pain that man works too hard or he has to take his mech arm off for pain/fatigue reasons and is trying to do shit anyway even though he needs rest. Also have this song it's related in my brain https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=0hEQi-cmnQY&si=SBkzpTLoj12w4Yw5

He's also a system 2 me <3 hivemimd supremacy

(that is a girl-tier take on the hivemind whats it like having a huge brain)

Doc sighed frustratedly as he tried and failed once again to weld a piece of metal with one hand.

The Hivemind had been cajoling him to take a break and rest, dammit, especially since the whole reason he was working with one hand at all was because his arm had started to dig into his shoulder and sting and it was going to draw blood soon if he hadn't tossed it aside with a low growl and his vision was blurry and his back ached and his muscles were leaden and-

You need to take a break, They hissed. The Hivemind's constant bee buzz in the back of Doc's mind tickled sometimes, but he'd gotten used to it over the years.

"It's fine, guys," he muttered with a small chuckle that he didn't quite feel. He always responded out loud when he was alone. It was easier than having distinguish between his thoughts and Theirs, anyways, and They could hear. "I'm just tired, that's all."

You're about to burn your finger, a quiet solitary voice chimed in, and Doc snapped to and adjusted his grip on the welder before dropping it and veritably growling with frustration. He felt the muscles in his legs start to work, and he desperately fought to stay in the chair. "Guys. Guys! It's fine! Let me- give it back!"

No, They hummed smugly.

"We only grind here, remember?" said Doc through gritted teeth, finding himself standing up suddenly as the buzzing in his mind grew louder. "Twenty-four seven."

Can't grind forever without taking a break, said the Hivemind, sing-song. You may be the G.O.A.T, but you're still mortal, and that means you have to sleep sometimes.

"No," said Doc, losing his grip on the chair and, briefly, his vision, as he saw from a distance (it felt like) himself going to the closet, his hand opening the door and grabbing a blanket, then shutting the door and walking over to his bed. "Dude, give my body back. I was in the middle of a project, guys."

You can finish it tomorrow, said one voice.

Or next week, suggested another. Anyways, no, you're getting a nap.

"One day I will kick you guys out of here and you will have nowhere to go," mumbled Doc, who was now tucked into bed. "No one to come home to."

And you won't have your 73,492 braincells, They responded cheekily. No, make that 73,493. Another one just joined the Hive. Good night, Doc.

The last thing Doc remembered before he passed out completely was a vague sense of grudging affection towards the Hive that populated his mind, and a chorus of quiet laughter that was laughing at him but for him at the same time.

#ray's tag #answered #mcyt #hermitcraft #docm77 #i really like this idea actually. might do more with it later #writing #thanks for the prompt! i also agree with every single one of your headcanons. u r correct.#this oneshot was sponsored by every single time someone else up here has taken the reins and gotten our fatigued ass into bed

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our-chaos · 2 years

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okay so i have no idea how to fuckin request things, butcha asked for s&b requests so here i am. literally ANYTHING with nikolai. maybe comfort sex? idfk. i just love that man to death and will gladly take anything. afab is preferable. thanks :)

I like you, you’re forward

(afab reader, fighting, sexual themes)

“I’m so sick of this Nikolai!” You shouted, slamming the large white door of the bathroom. You and your husband had been fighting more than usual, and there was a list of reasons why.

“Don’t you dare run from me.” Nikolai demanded, following you to the bathroom at the same pace you were fleeing his presence. He couldn’t quite catch up, his body colliding against the front of the door once you shut him out. “Dammit!” He cursed, taking a stiff hand and raking it through the top of his hair in frustration. “You’re driving me mad..” he mumbled, but you could hear it through the door.

“Mad? I’m driving you mad?” You scoffed, your eyes growing wide as a fire ignited in your chest. “How am I supposed to feel when my husband, my dear sweet husband is always off somewhere taking care of other people?” You asked him as if he’d know the answer to your question.

“What do you mean?” He asked, exasperated and taking the hand that had tried to soothe out his honey blonde locks and bringing it to do the same to his face. He rubbed his skin, stopping at the bridge of his nose as he sighed.

You felt tears well up, how does he not understand? It all seemed so obvious to you, every single time he would return home from being away you’d be curled into a ball inside your shared bed. Dried tears on your face and the white shirt he wore so much clutched to your chest. Maybe he didn’t notice, you tried to comfort yourself by begging your brain to believe that maybe he’s just as upset as you. Maybe he won’t show it. Or maybe he just doesn’t care. That’s when the tears began to fall, your cheeks stinging with the heat of anger.

“When you leave I-“ your sentence was cut off by a sob, which scared the living hell out of Nikolai because now he knew you were crying.

“Let me in.” Nikolai demanded, his voice sounding calm, but on the other end of the door he was erratic with his wide eyes and palms splayed out against the wood of the door.

“No, Nik.”

“Fucking let me in.” He cursed, emotion slipping through into his voice. You knew he was panicked. There was guilt in your stomach for scaring him, but then anger came after that because it wasn’t your fault he had hurt you. You brought your hand to the knob, twisting and unlocking the chain that held it shut tight. Once you opened the door he seemed to almost appear inside the bathroom so fast you got dizzy when he wrapped his arms around you. He enveloped you, his body connecting to yours like some kind of shield.

“Tell me.. When I leave, what?” He asked, questioning the sentence you began but cut yourself off from. You finally gave in, resting your cheek against his chest, listening to his wildly beating heart.

“When you leave.. I hear all these things from the maids in the palace. They say when you leave me so often that-..” You couldn’t possibly say it, the very words would rip your lips into shreds. Nikolai would never kiss you then.

“What. Do. You. Hear.” He spoke through gritted teeth, his hands that were gripping your waist tightened. Nikolai heard a plethora of rumors about himself, some were more believable than others, but he had a sickening feeling about where this was going.

“They say you sleep with others.. They say you have someone in every kingdom..” you admitted, your heart skipping a beat. You were right. You wanted to rip your mouth from your face, you wanted to throw away your voice and promise to never speak again if it meant you’d never have to say something like that once more. Nikolai didn’t react in the way you thought. He didn’t pull away and deny any of the rumors that you both swore weren’t true. He knew no matter what he said it wouldn’t change what others whispered into your ear as they tightened your corset or tailored your hair. You were his queen, of course, and everyone else wanted under that crown.

Nikolai brought his hands to cup your cheeks, wiping a tear from your eye with his thumb so delicately you wondered if he was afraid to break you.

“Promise me you won’t listen to them.” He asked of you, his voice soothing out into a calm whisper. His beautiful eyes were looking down into yours, the eyes that always seemed to be full of ambition and fearlessness. They were full of guilt now, sadness replaced the usual crystalline color.

“Promise me that whatever they say you’ll shut out.” He spoke again, tilting your chin up to look at him even more deeply.

“And that you don’t believe a word that comes from their mouth.”

All you could do was nod, and when he kissed you it almost knocked your feet from under you. It was full of passion, full of regret for everything you had to endure just being his wife. You clutched his jacket, the fabric pooling in your fists as you tugged him closer. Nikolai met your wishes with a step forward, pressing his body against yours.

“Do you need me to remind you who I married?” He cooed, crowding your form back until you were pressed against the wall. The coldness of it sent a chill up your spine, so you gasped, but Nikolai covered your mouth to keep you from making anymore noises.

“Hm?”

You could feel yourself go warm with slick, your cheeks heating so much you wondered if Nikolai could feel it under his palm. You nodded, compliantly, and then he smiled wickedly as he hoisted your leg up around his waist. He pressed his core against you in a way that made you squirm for more, but you know he’d give it to you. He always did.

“Let me show my absolute adoration for my queen..”

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone season 2 #nikolai x you #nikolai lantsov x you #prince nikolai #nikolai x reader #nikolai duology #nikolai lanstov x reader #nikolai lantsov #king of scars #king nikolai #anon

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jennathearcher · 1 month

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Thirteen horror movies that scared tf out of me

Thank you so much for tagging me @talesfromthecrypts!! I wanted to do this so bad and put entirely too much thought into it XD

Rules: list thirteen horror movies that at one point in time terrified the hell out of you

Skinamarink - probably goes without saying at this point; not everyone is gonna vibe with the visual style, and it actually helped a great deal that I watched it with someone who was bored out of their mind by it while I was ready to start climbing the walls from pure fear XD A+, 10/10, hate thinking about this so much :P

Hereditary - also a very obvious choice but COME ON. This is THE horror movie for me. Literally rewired my brain chemistry; totally changed the way I think about not only horror, but film IN GENERAL, just there is SO MUCH MORE YOU CAN DO??? Also points for connection to irl trauma of mine AND being the only movie to date that has made me curl up in the fetal position on a theatre seat 8D that moment when you feel so viscerally in danger you want nothing more than to flee the theatre but you also NEED TO KNOW HOW THIS FUCKING ENDS (you're not gonna sleep for a while and you're gonna LIKE IT DAMMIT) also extra points for being able to traumatize people without them actually having to watch it :P

Jennifer's Body - yes, believe it or not, I watched this movie as a teenager and it actually gave me nightmares XD seeing Megan Fox fully unhinge her jaw with like a gajillion teeth just did something to my brain, man :P and in retrospect I don't think it was a bad thing

Saint Maud - excellent movie, highly recommend it. Had to include it on the list because even though it didn't necessarily scare me as I was actively watching it, it was the sheer impact it left behind with me that has me like, cool cool cool, I can never watch that again :P seriously, I didn't touch another horror movie for six months after I watched this one

A Cure for Wellness - WE STAN THIS MOVIE IN THIS HOUSE however it has to make the list purely because I actively had an anxiety attack while watching it :P

Sleepy Hollow - another one from my teen years; I absolutely love it, and it's one of the first movies I can remember genuinely scaring the shit out of me while still remaining fun to watch?? Like, first time I was scared while watching a movie and didn't immediately have the desire to shut it off XD

Suspiria (2018) - god damn you Luca you gotta stop making adaptations that leave the source material so far behind in the dust that I never want to bother with them ever XD this one makes the cut because I watched it for the first time at home, and it's the only time where I had to actually pause the movie three-quarters of the way through and just. PROCESS. love this movie so much, will be salty forever that it financially flopped

The Conjuring - THE FUCKING HIDE AND CLAP SCENE. LEGIT ONE OF THE SCARIEST SCENES IN ALL OF CINEMA. MWAH. CHEF KISS. AMAZING. I physically GASPED the first time I saw it and I think you could actually pinpoint the moment I sold my soul to James Wan forever and ever :P

The Night House - sometimes you watch a movie and you think, "holy shit that was good," and then a year and a bit later you have to come back to it just to see if it is, in fact, as good as you thought it was, AND THEN IT I S. There is a stretch in this movie where even on the second watch I don't think I took a single breath during it. Just UGH. CINEMA.

Smile - I literally almost blocked this movie entirely out of my memory, that's how bad it fucked me up. You know shit is fucked when you had planned for this movie to be part of a whole evening of horror movies, only after watching it you're so fucked up all you can do is watch a couple episodes of anime and then go straight to bed. Is it perfect? No, but it scared the absolute fuck out of me so on the list it goes

Speak No Evil (2022) - oh my god I can't even. jdskdlsfdsf. I watched this on a WHIM and had to walk around my house in circles after for the better part of an hour. There's an American remake coming out this year with James McAvoy and if they do this right OH MAN. OHHHHH MAN.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) - listen to me okay LISTEN. I LOVE THIS MOVIE SO MUCH. This was my first real slasher movie I ever watched when I was a teenager just getting into actual horror movies and IT TOTALLY SCARED ME!!!! AND I LOVED IT!!!! feel free to judge me because I hate the original while still loving this one LISTEN IT JUST DIDN'T AGE WELL OKAY :P

The Lodge (2020): hooooooo fuck. I don't even know what I can SAY about this movie other than WATCH IT. It's underrated as hell and made me feel emotions hitherto only experienced by shrimp. Major content warning for pet death though, like BIG time, worst case I've ever seen in that regard

tagging: @afoxnamedmulder @thebarefootking and anyone else who wants to do the thing!! <3

#save tag #long post

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autisticlancemcclain · 2 years

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Keith had never believed people when they told him that dogs were not intelligent creatures. Growing up, he’d heard the same thing over and over again — dogs don’t have very big brain capacity, they could understand commands to a degree but not follow a conversation, et cetera, et cetera. Keith, stubborn as he was and is, remained steadfast in his belief that they were all wrong. Then he was 20, in space, part of Voltron, he found that he was right. Dogs are smart.

His dog, especially, is very intelligent.

Now, some people might assume that he has come to this conclusion because his dog is excellent at following commands. Or maybe because Kosmo was one of his only sources of company, on that space whale, so perhaps Keith believed they could converse. A more logical person might assume that Keith has observed Kosmo to be intelligent because, perhaps, he is an alien, and therefore not technically a dog.

They would all be incorrect. Keith knows his dog is intelligent because his dog is the most spiteful little shit he’s ever met.

Don’t get him wrong — Kosmo is the goodest boy in the universe. Keith now fully understands all those John Wick movies — if someone hurt Kosmo, Keith would go feral. He would go batshit insane. He’d kill some people. He loves his dog.

His dog is still a motherfucker.

Not once, in the two years they were on that space whale, did Kosmo follow even one of his commands. ‘Sit?’ No. ‘Stop jumping on people?’ Don’t kid yourself. ‘Please stop screaming at the moon in the dead of night when I’m trying to sleep?’ Forget it. ‘Fetch?’ In your fucking dreams. At first, Keith was like, okay. Whatever, you know? Maybe alien dogs don’t do commands. Maybe Kosmo doesn’t speak English. Krolia tried a few commands in Galran, to no effect. Eventually, he and Krolia gave up. It was fine. Kosmo was a pretty well behaved dog when he wanted to be, which was occasionally. He just didn’t follow commands — he can’t! He’s incapable.

And then Kosmo met Lance, and Keith knew his dog was a dirty liar.

———

“—as soon as they get back, we need to —”

Lance’s loud gasp cuts off what Keith is trying to say, so Keith turns towards him, a reprimand prepared on his tongue, only for words to fail him. Lance is staring at the space behind Keith, dark brown eyes wide and elated, beam so bright Keith feels the force of it settle heavily in his bone marrow.

“Is that a puppy?!”

Upon hearing the call, Kosmo perks right up, tail wagging so fast it blurs, and bounds right over to Lance.

All 200 pounds of him, full speed, straight towards Lance, who is scrawny as a string bean and maybe 120 pounds soaking wet.

Keith foresees some injuries.

“Wait, Kosmo, no jumping —”

Kosmo, of course, does not heed Keith’s command, and is far too fast for Krolia to grab hold of him. He continues to barrel towards the Cuban, and Keith feels time slow as Kosmo zooms forward. He squeezes his eyes shut, knowing poor Lance is going to go flying, and dammit he was going to be so mad at Keith —

“Down, boy.”

Keith blinks his eyes open only to see, right clearly in front of him, his traitor of a dog sitting, patiently, in front of Lance. Tail wagging and tongue lolling out in a big doggy grin.

Keith’s jaw drops. He hears Krolia mutter incredulously behind him.

“Oh, who’s a good, strong, well-behaved boy, huh?” Lance coos, dropping to his knees in front of Kosmo in order to adequately shower him in affection. “You are the sweetest, most wonderfullest dog in the universe, aren’t you?”

Kosmo howls.

“Aren’t you?”

Kosmo howls louder, batting his head forwards — gently! So fucking gently! Keith had never seen that little brat be gentle even once in his life! Once, Kosmo had tackled Keith right into a pile of rocks! He’d gotten a concussion! — in glee. Lance laughs, bright and loud, and Keith flushes in spite of his frustration.

“What’s your name, boy, huh?”

“Kosmo,” Keith answers weakly, because the dog can’t damn well do it himself (unless he has some other abilities he’s been hiding, the fucker).

“Kosmo, please know I love you more than anything ever,” Lance says, ignoring Hunk’s offended ‘hey!’ in the background.

Lance pays him no mind and continues to lavish Kosmo with love, and Kosmo eats it all up as if he’s been starved. As if Keith has not provided him with hourly smooches and cuddles since he was a literal baby.

Traitor.

After several minutes of Keith staring in incredulous (and, okay, perhaps affectionate) silence, Krolia clears her throat.

“Urgent business, Keith,” she reminds him.

“Oh, uh, right —”

Keith goes on to explain the crisis with Lotor, emphasizing the danger they’re all in, but he’s — distracted. Suddenly he wishes he hadn’t cut Lance off earlier, wishes he had given him the hug he asked for. Keith swallows, throat dry.

He’ll make it up to him.

———

He doesn’t really get to apologise to Lance, not in the way that he’d like. They’re just so busy, so chaotic, in between dealing with Lotor and losing the Castle and getting the real Shiro back — it’s just been a mess. Not that it’s an excuse, but it’s at least a reason.

Finally, though, a few weeks after the Lotor Incident, everyone is nicely settled on a planet, ready to camp for the night.

Keith, now starting to get comfortable again in his role as leader (with a lot of help from Lance, which shouldn’t make his heart pound and face light up with a pleased flush but does anyway because he’s a whipped loser, unfortunately), assigns everyone with a task, then sets about scouring the area to make sure they’ll be safe to sleep for the night.

When he comes back, area secured, he’s surprised to find himself alone at the campsite. The others must be taking their time, maybe doing chores together and chatting. That’s fine. They’ve got nowhere to be.

“Here, boy, you wanna try something new?”

Apparently not Lance, though. Keith jogs over to where he heard Lance’s voice, only to find him crouching in front of Kosmo, holding a decently sized stick from the pile of firewood he’s gathered behind him. Keith snorts. Lance may have more luck getting Kosmo to listen than the rest of them, but fetch is a lost cause.

“Don’t waste your breath, Lance,” Keith calls, startling the Cuban a little. “Kosmo doesn’t do fetch.”

Lance rolls his eyes, corners of his lips quirking up. “Animals tend to listen to me. I think I can do it.”

“I dunno. Kosmo is the stubbornest bitch I’ve ever met, next to you,” Keith teases.

Lance scoffs, but he’s grinning. “Oh, okay, Mr. I-Tried-To-Fight-Zarkon-With-My-Fists.”

Keith laughs. He’s missed this — their banter, the teasing, the poorly-covered affection. He’s missed Lance.

“Yeah, yeah, Cargo Pilot. Go ahead. Try it.”

Lance’s grin turns sharp, and Keith swallows. Somehow, someway, in his time away, he’d forgot how sexy Lance is when he’s being cocky.

“Watch and learn, Dropout.”

Without another beat he’s turning back towards Kosmo, who looks smugly (damn dog) at Keith before turning wide, falsely-innocent eyes towards his new best friend.

“Are you ready, sweet boy?” Lance coos, and Kosmo barks excitedly, hopping around.

“Okay, buddy! See this stuck here?”

He holds the stick out towards Kosmo, who sniffs it. Lance praises him heavily, reaching into his pocket and tossing him a treat.

“Yes, that’s right! Good boy!”

Kosmo yips, and Lance smiles, patting his head. “Now, here’s the next part — when I move the stick, you’re gonna follow it, okay?”

Lance slowly and gently moves the stick as far as he can to his left, keeping a hold on it, and Kosmo follows it dutifully.

Keith feels that earlier incredulousness bubbling back up. No fucking way.

“Excellent, Kosmo! Good job!” Lance gives him another treat, making Kosmo’s tail wag faster.

“Okay, buddy, last step: I’m gonna throw the stick, and then you’re gonna go bring it back for me, okay? And then you can have another treat. You ready?”

Kosmo honest-to-God nods, and Lance draws the stick back, before launching forward with a good amount of strength.

“Go fetch, Kosmo!”

Kosmo bounds after the stick immediately, howling loudly as he does. Keith’s jaw drops.

“No way!”

Lance smirks at him. “Yes way. Told ya.”

“Fuck off, it doesn’t count unless he bring it back, and he won’t.”

He fucking better not, the little asshole. Keith tried to teach him fetch for three goddamn months.

No sooner do the words leave his mouth does Kosmo come tearing across the field, stick clamped firmly in his jaws. He skids to a stop in front of Lance, dropping the stick at his feet, then sits, tongue lolling out expectantly.

“Oh, Kosmo, you’re so smart! Good, good boy!”

Lance gives him his treat, which Kosmo devours, and then the damn dog turns toward Keith, huffs, and prances off with his snout in the air. As if he’s the one who’s been offended.

Lance cackles. Keith sputters.

“Why — he just — that little turd!”

Keith’s indignance makes Lance laugh harder, hunching over and clutching his waist.

“Y — your face —”

Keith can’t bring himself to be truly mad, not in the direct presence of Lance’s musical laughter.

Doesn’t stop him from putting Lance in a headlock and fucking up his hair, though. Keith may be in love with him, but he has some dignity left, and he’s not gonna stand there, moony-eyes, as someone laughs at him. (Is he going to high dreamily about it later? …Possibly.)

———

Later, in his tent, Kosmo sprawled on top of him, Keith sighs, dragging a hand down his face. He keeps his other hand where is is, scratching Kosmo under the chin.

“Is this because I told you stories about mostly Lance on the space whale?” he whispers. “Is that why you listen to him?”

Kosmo turns his big round eyes towards Keith, blinking slowly. Obviously, he doesn’t answer.

“I think it is. I think I said the name Lance too often when you were a puppy, and it hardwired into your brain, or something.”

Kosmo leans over a licks a long, wet stripe up Keith’s face, making him laugh and shove him away. “Gross, you goober. Now I got slobber all over my face. Ugh.”

He still leans forward and plants a big kiss on his dumb dog’s forehead, even if that dog is a slobbery traitor who does not deserve Keith’s kisses. (Who is he kidding. Kosmo could body slam Keith off a cliff and he’d still give him as many kisses as he wants. Keith loves his dog.)

“Turncoat,” he mutters into think fur. “You’re supposed to be my best friend, but with all the simping you’re doing for Lance he’s gonna like you better than me, and then I don’t get a chance.”

He huffs a laugh, rolling his eyes at himself. “God, I need to go to sleep.”

He presses another kiss to Kosmo’s head before collapsing backwards, crossing his arms behind his head and closing his eyes.

He dreams of him and Lance and Kosmo, in a house of their own, overlooking the ocean.

Maybe someday.

———

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mentallyilllittleguy · 1 year

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TW - Ghost trauma (mental health issues, abuse, references to SA) and symbolic NSFW (not explicit)

'A Pearl' by Mitski, told through Ghost and his relationships. (Please note: some repeated lines are omitted for the sake of comprehension and brevity.)

You're growing tired of me

You love me so hard and I still can't sleep

Ghost looks down at Soap. The man is laying on his chest, fast asleep.

An unsettled feeling grows in his stomach. It's two a.m., meaning he should be asleep too, but... he just can't seem to find it in himself.

He's turning those words over in his head, again and again and again:

"I love you, Simon. Even if you're a dead man."

Dammit, that accent made him weak in the knees. It makes his head spin, like he's going to vomit. Sick, like a punch to the gut. He heard those first three words from his mother... once. His brother, a few times, back when he was tiny and ham-fisted. No one had said it since.

You're growing tired of me

And all the things I don't talk about

Roach's eyes, when not covered by a pair of sunglasses, are a soft, chocolate colour. They match his warm brown skin perfectly.

"Ya don't have to tell me, Si," he says, his fluttering lashes and crinkled nose the perfect portrayal of the sadness he reflects from Ghost. "I mean, fuck, I'm glad you even told me what ya did."

Ghost shakes his head, his eyes burning. It's not good enough, but he can't cry now.

"Simon." Roach has cupped Ghost's cheek in his hand. "It's alright, darl'." His Australian drawl is soothing, his touch warm enough to feel as though it's sinking into Ghost's bones.

"I'm sorry," Ghost rasps. His throat is closing up and he knows he's going non-verbal. He quickly signs, "Space."

Roach nods. "That's alright, sweet'eart. You've got nothing to be sorry for, but I understand why you feel like you need to apologise."

He blows a kiss to Ghost and leaves the room, shutting the door gently behind him.

Sorry, I don't want your touch

It's not that I don't want you

Sorry, I can't take your touch

"Ghost?" Soap says, slowly approaching.

The screams keep echoing around Ghost's head. There's pain all over his body, that hook sunk deep in his stomach. He remembers what it was like to have those people touch him, grab him and use his body in the most sadistic ways possible.

"Ghost," Soap says. He kneels down next to Ghost and touches his arm.

Ghost flinches away.

"What's wrong?" Soap asks.

Shaking his head, Ghost reaches out to push Soap away. His throat is full of words and sounds and feelings and they're all clogged up. The push falls short, and Soap creeps closer.

"Ghost, can you tell me five things you can see?"

Still too far away to push, Soap lingers. His fingers are splayed out, hand outstretched as though he wants to touch Ghost. Ghost starts thinking about the texture of skin and the heat of it and the goosebumps it will cause on his own skin and the idea of those sensory things makes him want to throw up, makes him want to rip his skin off, makes him want to scream until his throat begins to bleed.

Soap inches closer and Ghost starts to scream, banging his hands on the floor. It's all too much. Everything is too much. He can feel everything and hear it and see it and smell it and taste it and its crammed inside his skull and he is going to die.

He screams and screams and screams... and when he finally feels like the energy and itch of his body is dispelled, he sees that his fists are dripping with blood, the floor beside him spattered in it.

What he notices next is that Soap is nowhere to be seen. That feels like a stab to the heart. He wonders why he pushes Soap away every single time. And yes, he was having a sensory meltdown but fuck, why can't his brain just let him have one good thing to comfort him? Just one would do.

It's just that I fell in love with a war

Nobody told me it ended

And it left a pearl in my head

And I roll it around every night

Just to watch it glow

Every night baby that's where I go

"You're always there, aren't you?" Roach asks.

Ghost looks up at him, startled. The thoughts that clink around in his head become quieter.

"What do you mean?"

With a sad smile, Roach comes to sit in front of him. They're both cross-legged on the bed they share - small, cold figures of the night. The moonlight from outside reveals the rhythm of Roach's lips as he speaks.

"You're always stuck in all those places where something horrific happened. I can see it. There's this... emptiness." Gentle as ever, Roach's hand cups his cheek. "If you ever need me, take me with you. I love you."

"I love you too," Ghost says. He kisses Roach's palm.

There's a hole that you fill

You fill

With Soap behind him, inside him, and Roach's hands touching every centimetre of his skin... he feels so whole.

Soap is buried so deeply inside him that he simply feels full, the gnawing ache of the cold in his gut finally sated by the blaze of heat that is Soap's pure and utter adoration for him. Warmth curls around his neck with his huff of Soap's breath, revelling in how tightly those calloused hands hold his hips, rejoicing at the force with which Soap shows his love.

Roach's hands are all over him, palming at his chest and stomach, rolling the muscles and savouring them. His lips work against Ghost's like a lifeline, as if any kind of part between them could bring about their death. He's soft under Ghost's touch, malleable and kind, his breath softly fanning over Ghost's face, wisping through his hair.

Every touch, every breath... it's filling. It fills his heart in a way that can't be described. He allows himself to drift into the tide of warmth, lost to the rhythm of his own heart beating, floating on that high of euphoria.

It's just that I fell in love with a war

Nobody told me it ended

And it left a pearl in my head

And I roll it around every night

Just to watch it glow

Every night baby that's where I go

Just to watch it glow

The more Ghost thinks about it and the more he discusses his past with Soap and Roach, the more he begins to think that a pearl has formed inside his skull. It's something that has taken years to form, created through pressure and duress, hidden inside him until he can be prised open. That opening would reveal soft, vulnerable tissue, nestling a creamy white pearl in its dip. A pearl that is beautiful, yet eerily so. Maybe one day, Soap and Roach will be able to open him up and behold the pearl. Until then, Ghost lets it roll around his skull, smiling and watching it glow.

#call of duty #simon ghost riley #ghost #cod #ghost call of duty #john soap mactavish #ghostsoap #john mactavish #soap cod #gary roach sanderson #mitski #a pearl #a pearl mitski

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popculturebuffet · 7 months

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Sam and Max Beyond Time and Space Retrospective: Night of the Raving Dead

Happy halloween all you happy freelance police. I"m jake and my Sam and Max Beyond Time and Space retrospective continues as Sam and Max fight a guy who sucks just in time for spooky season.

Chapter 3 gives us a fun spooky good time as we have zombies, frankenstines and vampires as our dynamic duo have to beat a club hopping german vampire before his army of the undead conquer the world. So a normal tuesday really. Can our heroes save the world.. again? Will we have to see a lot of pierced vampire nipples? Is Lincoln still the worst Short answer, of course, just look at the article image, and i'm still in cringing agony so.. can confirm. Long answer is under the cut!

Night of the Raving Dead begins In Media Res and milks it for all it's worth: Sam and Max are in a soul sucking machine, at the mercy of Jurgen, a european vampire who never wears a shirt but does gladly show off his pierced nipples. Still better than bebops. Firm 6/10.

At any rate pierced nips aren't the issue as the threat here is your old fashioned spike wall style trap I know just the man for the job but sadly he's was a bit busy with his own spiked wall issues

So instead we flash back to the start of this tale.

And to my delight our heroes continue to pile up junk in their office. Sam has now added a holy urn and is still high priest seperation of chruch and state kneels before god emperor priest president Max!

Our heroes have a bit of infestation though in their office there's something all too familiar

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These are not greasy teen zombies or greasy gnomes or even the dreaded Crombie, but European Zombies! So it's up to us to talk to everyone and find out why. In an intresting reversal this time it's Bosco whose closed, while Sybil's reopened her place, because we psychologically tortured him into disappearing.

Sybil meanwhile is looking for love in all the wrong places as after her relationship with Abe Ended she's restarted her dating service.. but just for her. After the obvious sex work joke because this is the 2000's, Sybil is basically screening dates... and is currnetly screening a moleman.

But after he failed we're left with Harry Moleman. Whose back for some reason. Gotta reuse those models I guess. He has aboslutely no shot and Sybil is being just polite. He also has a choclate heart we'll need later and a fear of zombie's we'll exploit later

Moving over to Stinky's her latest special is a gooey cake/chekov's gun, while her latest item we can grab is a sunlamp bulb since even she has no idea why it's there, but the plot does. The plot sees all.

Anyway abe's also there.. .and still the worst as he blames Sybil for the breakup, is stalking her and won't shut up

Yeah I liked Abe at first.. but in a record TWO episodes he's gone from endearing into the hall

It's a shame too as I really DID like abe in season one and the first episode of this but this gag, ESPECIALLY wiith how the sybil plot concludes, really dosen't work.

Thankfully we move on to our boys the C.O.P.S. who have decided to captalize on this to sell internet to zombies, via online trial discs. For those too young to know what those are

For now though we can't get any of those future coasters, but we do found out poor bluster has some brain damage which was also funnier at the time. We do find out the source of the ZOmbies: the zombie factory in Stuttgard, Germany. And to my shock Stuttgart is a real place. I would've asked my german friend , but she needs sleep and isn't awake till midnight like moi.... am I a vampire? ... no. No I love garlic bread too much to make that sacrifice. Then again It'd also make it easier to meet Matt Berry.. dammit this is a dillema.

While I mull this over we move on to Stuttgard. I didn't ask said friend, @galaxysupernaturalstuff because again, asleep.. and because I forgot earlier. Though I probably DON'T need an actual german to tell me "yeah Stuttgart isn't a small villiage with a giant castle in the middle of it. "They thankfully don't do too many german stereotypes about the country as a whole, the only gags they do being the fairly innocent beerstein and the fact Midtown Cowboys is big there. It's done more in a tounge in cheek way than anything genuinely offensive.

Turns out the Zombie Factory is both your standard spooky hammer horror style monster castle.. and a club, and to get in we need to get past the bouncer, good old superball.

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Yeah like the Bosco scremaing thing this is a runner nad a truly great one. Also unlike that one it's both nonseical and you can't get punched for it. He's working for Jurgen, our big bad, because his doors are rich fine mahogany.. and he needs SOMETHING to do after the divorce. He was married. I'd.. genuinely forgot that.

To get past him we once again have to do something that's likely to get me sent to hell for playing this game: take a brain from a fresh corpse

Then we throw it to a gargoyle which suprisingly ISN'T alive, nor voiced by keith david despite it being night, allowing us to cut the line.

It's inside we get a ZOMBIE DISCO BITCHES. We meet our arc villian and the mastermind behind this half baked scheme, Jurgen. Jurgern.. is a deliglight: he's basically every 20 something trying to seem cool by clubing distilled into a vampire and given a german accent and nipple rings. And he is glorious. The fact his plan is just "Conquer teh world with zombies" jah helps. our heroes just try to go for the head.. but Jurgen can teleport so we need to take the source of his powers: his...

And it's fun too as each one is simply hitting him with his vampire weakensses.. and the how, as usual is fun and redicuous. That being said actually solving these puzzles.. is a lot. I ended up hitting a dead end: I figured given the tropes at play that the key was to trigger some type of hidden entrance to get up to the balcony to replace the bulbs in the spotlight with the sunlamp. And it is.. btu the how is INCREDIBLY overcomplicated. While the writing couldn't be stronger this chapter and where your supposed to go MOSTLY straight foward, the actual puzzles are often overcomplicated. The ones in the Zombie Factory itself rely HEAVILY on a dj soundboard , which you have to put the right words from one of jurgen's poems into, without it being clear which words in the poem are a clue. Also solving the spotlight DOSEN'T fix the problem and you still have two other things to do to him, only one of which is pretty easy to figure out since after Jurgen mentions he's a huge midtown cowboys fangboy, a new area unlocked announcment shows up. As it did with the COPS when this castle unlocked. Both a great gag and a nice bit of gameplay magic to make this easier.

So yeah.. I used a guide for most of this. This is one of the trickier ones gameplay wise and if you don't adventure game often or have a lot of patience

It can be maddening. There's also another "pick a random dialouge option fo ra song" puzzle like last season, which just.. isn't fun. Picking various options is only funny if there's multiple jokes, like the cooking without looking segment from last game. Basically asking "PICK RANDOM DIALOUGE FOR US FEASANT" isn't fun it's just keeping me from having fun with the part of the game I actually like.

So with that we an shine a little sunlight on Jurgen's life, causing him to freak out and loose a little respect of his fanbase. Like any influencer in embyro, just one stab to his rep isn't going to do it but it's a start. Next it's time to return to Midtown Cowboys! Their probably hiding a cow. Midtown Cowboys have been saved from cancelation baby! See back then Networks actually.. payed attention to things like audience numbers or dvd and digital sales instead of guarding the numbers like a cave troll so they can cancel whatever they want whenever they want. Gee I wonder why the actor's strike has taken 105 days with that kind of job security.

As it turns out Midtown Cowboys is HUGE in germany, with WARP having converted to just shooting Midtown Cowboys and spinoffs. Hey at least they beat Disney+ to the punch with that model. Turns out the statoin lady's been TRYING to get our heroes back in they've just been busy and such.. and max also deleted her messages because he be like that.

We also reunite with my boy Mr. Featherly, who legally changed his name from Philo Pennyworth. While he DID go back to theater even he can't resist the siren call of "buy your own private island fortress" money. Max naturally signed away those rights without thinking. They lost 4 executives that day..so you know it's not all bad.

We can still use the broadcast to our advntage though, stashing some garlic cigarettes from outside the castle in Featherly's bag as a prop. What follows.. is comedy gold. While we sadly don't get a cookin without lookin sequel, I wanted to use baboon hearts, what we do get is just as funny as we get a very special episode, the kind sitcoms used to do to tackle the heavy issues instead of just weaving them in if it fits the tone.

The cowboys hold an interviention for mr. featherly, who finds out they were indeed hiding a cow but he has his own cow.. a smoking addiction. Even Bessie is disapointed. It then quickly turns into an add for smoking and why it's totally rad and you should all do it as their sponsor.. is garlic clove cigarettes. It's so fucked and I love it. IT's a simple idea i'm genuinely suprised I haven't seen elsewhere and genius.

So with that we just have one last thing to destroy this man's career: we need a man of the faith to bless some water bottles we got at the club. But since Shelby isn't around, we'll have to make do with max, dunking the water bottles in his sacred urn while he gives us the sacred rites

The problem is as seen with the cigs, while Jurgen is many things, a hipster, a scene kid, a goth, a tool, a vampire, a mild german sterotype, a dracula, an emo, a direct to video sequel to Dracula 2000, a nipple piercing sorta guy, european, german, big dicked, bad at poetry, a plagarist, a mad scientest, an outer god... he is not dumb enough to let people carry in his weaknesses. Dumb enough to keep some of them in his private lab as we'll see, but still not dumb enough to let vampire hunters right in.

So to get it past we have to have max drink the holy water. You'd think this would mean max would get set on fire, another vampire weakness but it just give shim a halo. I guess his own religion can't cast him into the firey depths.

It's a once again limited time thing.. though I don't get WHY in this case. I get having it wear off to show it has to be used IN the castle.. but why does it wear off on the dance floor.

Anyways to beat jurgen we have to out out emo him with lyrics about darkness, no parents, continued darkness, and of course

We DO basically win, but normally jurgen would copy us. I know because I did this puzzle before knowing the solution. He drinks max. Thankfully his drinking Holy Water makes him need to go potty. You know if I had a nickle for every time we had to defeat one of our foes by making him need to go to the bathroom i'd have three nickels.. which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened thrice.

So we follow Jurgen to his lair but given we've only done three puzzle's we're not done yet, two act structure and all as SAM AND MAX ENGAGE IN THE MOST THRILLING BATTLE OF THEIR CAREERS... bringing them to the trap.. which thanks to Sam being busy recapping, works and swallows our heroes souls. Jurgen goes.. somewhere, leaving us in his study. We find some useful junk, including a stake, and a monster.

This is Jurgen's Monster, who like his master I dearly love, a poetic beast whose mad you brought him to life as he's so lonely. Can relate dude, can, relate.

Helping him win a date with Sybil is our main quest from her eon out as she has a soul mater, a weird horrifying eldrich device she dosen't know how to use, so her finding her soul mate means we can have it. Which is good because Sam and Max's souls don't want to go back after how their bodies have misused them, waiting to go to the next life. To put a stop to our souls going to hell a few chapters early we need that soul mater.

What follows is a LOT of stuff since we don't have just 7 days to make jurgen a mannnnnnnnnnnn. We can't get him pink and quite clean but we CAN get him a brain via our old friend Flint Paper and the Zombie of Abe LIncon. Yeah turns out Abe was buried in Stuttgart and thus we meet the real abe whose loyal to his dead wife and actually likeable. Sadly he's brutalyl murdered because Flint Paper is on the warpath. He wants to kill us because "THey'd rather be dead than undead!" Sam and Max don't remember making him promise that and thus use another hidden passage to knock him out and get the brain.

Next we need a proper hand. Thankfully the zombie from the intro stole jessie james hand, which is now alive and holding up girl stinky. To get it we need to trick it and this puzzle is clever: the hand hops every time it shoots. So we simply have to make it get all the way to girl stinky, then put his attention her so it goes the other way.. straight into the goey cake. We got our HANNNDDD BACCCKKKK.

We now need to give him some heart. This one's a tad overcomplicated, even by this chapter's standards: first we need to play the cops game for this chapter, distrubing internet demo disks paperboy style. This game is tricky, but unlike the difficulty in this chapter, it's a fair kind once you figure it out. You have to move your car to be in the right position to hit the zombies with a disk. It's still hard, but it's the fun kind of hard

With that we have a big anetna we can bolt cutter off the car and use to power up Jurgen's alchemy machine.

To get our final body part though we need to play the dating game against featherly and harry moleman

Harry is just hopeless and Featherly is pretentious: LIncoln's brain is the only thing Sybil liked about him, and the hand has jurgen spell out I love sybil. Awwwwww. We just need a heart of gold as the ones we have are a clock and plants that make us into mr. van dresen. I mean .. you'd think playing a good rendention of lesbian segull would woo her but I guess it's not her thing.

No we need a heart. Luckily Harry takes his time answering a question and has a choclate heart, and even more luckily this time ruining his life dosen't feel bad as he's tried to murder us, sybil and really had ZERO chance before shouting at us.

With that we can be in it to win it, using the science and the alchemy to give us a gold heart and winning Sybils. Unfourtnatley the game then makes a pretty bleh error in judgment, as Sybil realizes she still wants abe and.. runs off to apologize to the bastard

Yeah this joke is all kinds of messed up. I get her going back IS the joke, that he's bad for her.. but it just comes off stupid, and mildly sexist as it feeds into the old "oh women like jerks" sterotypes instead of "abusive relationships happen". I mean it's a lot to ask sam and max to be realistic, so i'm fine with that but it's not a lot to ask them to actually be funny if their going to do something this annoying.

So on that sour note the climax. We get our souls back and fight jurgen, who has a plan.. of.. some sort. Anyways we can't stake him because we're too slow, so we toss the soul mater to jurgen's monster pull the lever kronk and swap bodies, using his to finally put this chapter to it's eternal rest... but not before flint comes in and tragically jurgen's monster dies.

I'm.. still not over it but i've been asured he returns somehow. And there's no time to punch flint for this as it turns out the reason he dived in guns a blazing to see us earlier is that he needs our help: bosco isn't just missing... he's NOWHERE ON EARTH

Night of the Raving dead is one of my faviorite chapters writing wise, with lots of clever jokes, an all timer villian and tons of my faviorite characters.. and abe. The abe stuff drags it down slightly, but everything else is so good this is easily my second faviorite chapter of the games thus far behind Save the World's The Mafia, the Mole and the Meatball.

It still suffers from some of this games overarching issues: the puzzles are more obtuse, the writing can be a bit mean spirited, and I don't have a third thing. Beyond Time and Space thus far isn't BAD, and has legs up on it's predecessor with gorgeous environments, but it still feels a bit of a step back from the previous one. It's got a bigger budget.. but it's just not as fun as the later chapters of save the world. It's not a bad game, the writing is as sharp as ever and most of your terrible actions are too over the top to not be funny, but it dosen't have quite the charm the first one did.

Next Time: I .. genuinely dont' know. The descrption for this one is more vauge. the only thing I know for sure is we'll finally meet THEM

Thanks for reading

#sam and max #sam and max beyond time and space #telltale games #skunkape games #halloween #vampiers #stuttgart #europe #midtown cowboys #Youtube

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