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jhuzen · 1 year

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a game of chase [m.reader]

i told myself i’d never get caught dead doing a solo childe fic bc my friends and i hate him. well. i’m not dead yet. ahdijsidmv. jk i’m just taking a break from a fic i’m writing so have this one-shot :D. idk why but when i thought of this, childe fits for some reason. and when i brought this up with my friend, they only said “yeah, the attention whore checks out”.

𖦹 i have no idea what genre this is, childe pining for you like mad, my indulgent hc of ekaterina being so done with her boss, a little bit of some characters x you

For every unfortunate soul out there that Childe would have the pleasure of coming across, he made a personal ranking of just how good that first meet was. Of course, it didn’t happen until halfway through he realized how much fun it was to catch some opponents off guard. And on times that he has to go and personally fight to collect certain debts for the bank, he always liked the absolute fear he instilled in every person.

Oddly enough, it wasn’t an ambush he created to be the one sitting at the top rank. Rather, it was his meeting with the traveler. It’s not everyday you see someone with a little flying child getting chased by the Millelith the moment they’ve stepped foot in Liyue. It was hilarious, really. And their meet was nothing short of pure amusement.

And yet, even rankings change.

Especially with the way you barged into his not-so-quaint little life.

A quiet stroll through the harbor — that’s all Chile ever needed and he knew he’d be set to sit on his chair for hours on end, doing boring old paperwork and reports to submit to The Jester. It was nothing to exciting, hence his innate need to get out and go for some fresh air. Take it as a preparation for this grueling boredom that he’s about to face. Though his subordinate preferred he start work now, he still was the one who has the last say.

And so here he was.

Children that reminded him of his little siblings loitered around, playing with huge smiles on their faces. It warmed his heart as he thought about his cold motherland where his family was. He ought to head back as soon as he finishes his reports for now. Just a few days with his family will do the trick.

Vendors by their stalls beckoned to him. He is the facilitator of the Northland Bank in Liyue’s Branch. It’s not too odd to be pulled aside constantly to be offered certain goods. They were only doing business, and as someone who has a sizable mora to spare, it wasn’t surprising to be solicited by them.

With a quick wave to the vendors, he rounded the corner. It was the relatively quiet part of the harbor — not often populated by any vendors as it wasn’t quite in the middle of the bustling crowd where anyone could see. It was quiet. And for someone like him who craved the noise of every clanging blades in a spar, the pained grunts of opponents, and the sound of a blunt impact from every landed punch, Childe enjoyed this part.

A subtle pout came onto his features as he realized that it wouldn’t be long before he has to go back and face the music of the cumbersome paperworks.

Well, that would have happened until his keen ears heard hurried footsteps hitting the pavement. He looked over his shoulder only to see someone hellbent on running. His mind quickly deduced the way you ran — calculative in steps and yet still on a hurry.

Is this guy running away from someone?

Hiding away from them too, in fact, as you booked it to his direction, and before Childe could even react, you had a hand on his wrist that not even he can tear away from. Your head snapped towards an alleyway and shoved him in it, with you following after as you caged him in this tight squeeze of a gap.

Childe blinked. And while he had many questions, your tensed silence was enough for him to clamp his mouth shut, with only your short ragged breaths filling the quiet space.

It didn’t take long though before a portion of his hypothesis was quickly answered as he heard dozens of heavy footsteps and clamoring armor heading to the direction where you and him were in. While you were a tad bit taller, he managed to see over your shoulder a couple of Millelith soldiers all in hot pursuit of you, no doubt. His dull eyes looked up at you, and even with the heavy shadow, he could faintly make out your relieved face when the soldiers came to pass.

You both waited for yet another excruciating minute until the soldier’s clanking armors finally drowned out in distance. A sigh of relief escaped your lips as you finally shimmied your way out of that tight gap, hand already pulling the little harbinger by the wrist once more.

“Sorry about that,” you finally spoke and Childe had to nod. For once, he was less chattier as he slowly rode out the mild thrill in his system. “I had to leave no witnesses.”

He quickly regained his footing in the conversation and chuckled, “Yeah? And I don’t suppose I’m your only witness?” He asked, adjusting his clothing from all the ruckus of being shoved in a dark corner.

“I ran out of luck hiding. So, yeah. You’re the only witness. And besides, if I move anymore while wearing this, I’m bound to attract more than what I intend — which is none,” You shifted around in your clothing, which now Childe took note of. You were dressed in the finest robes, patterned with the most graceful looking snakes and dragons that were no doubt handwoven by skilled artisans in Liyue.

Childe also happened to look up at your visage, cleaned up nice and well, hair done neatly aside from the little stray hairs that went out of place from what he assumed was your little chase with the Millelith. His brain quickly noticed the incongruence. You looked like an important figure and yet… you were being chased around by the people meant to protect figures that are deemed important.

He cocked an eyebrow, sizing you up and down, and you almost laughed at how hard he concentrated. You kept quiet as you waited for his little guess.

“A politician?” He tried and you quickly shot it down. Though, if Childe was being honest, with that Adeptus working in the Qixing as well as that scary fellow hydro vision and bow user lady, there was no room for corruption in the position of power. And besides, there would have been news around, even through rumors, knowing how well informed Liyue citizens could be.

Childe took a step back before he realized just what in Teyvat you were wearing. Those robes were no ordinary ones — they were a traditional Liyue garment used in ceremonies.

Your grin was evident as he locked in his final answer with a flabbergasted look;

“A runaway groom.”

“Bingo.”

“Well, I’ve heard of brides being whisked away before. But I’ve never heard of a runaway groom.” Childe laughed a little, but even in his dull eyes, a flash of pity and curiosity shone through which did not escape you. “What happened to you, man?”

You waved him off with a charming grin, “Nothing you should concern yourself over, my good friend. I just happened to be the unfortunate son who had to be pawned off to a lovely lady to expand our clan’s horizons.”

“That’s insane.”

“It is. Such is the life of a nobleman. Well, no, not always — just some special nutcases who can’t live without power.”

That was how Childe met you. Through a chase. A chase that decided the path of a good portion of your life.

How ironic was it that now he was trying to determine a certain part of his life through a chase.

Perhaps the fact that you were being chased when he met you was an omen of some sort of how his tumultuous love would end up. Childe wasn’t always superstitious, he only believes in the palpable results, the successes in his every mission, and the triumph that gives him high in every victorious ending in fights. But now, the thought of it was slowly questioning his radically logical mind.

Because now, he was chasing after you. Despite the fact that you’ve settled over your marital affairs, you risked your connections being severed from your family when you refused to marry the woman that waited for you by the ceremonial altar. And when you did, you proved everyone wrong by living a far more comfortable life at the edge of the harbor, managing a little teahouse that Childe had funded in capital for you.

In hindsight, the harbinger’s claims of generating more profit should have been an obvious forefront of how his emotions truly manifested. It was a hulking passionate love that towered over everyone but somehow it could never reach the peak where you sat in peace, making tea and indulging the bliss of your freedom.

Though Childe, despite the rationality that he claims he possesses, can be an unreliable narrator. He lies to protect his family, so it’s not a surprise to say that although true, his imaginative descriptions of his love for you is anything but tragic and complicated.

Simply put — he loves you but you were so, so dense.

Always just a foot away no matter how much he ran to catch up to you. No matter how many times he dropped by your shop that he proudly invested in, bringing you lavish gifts to woo you, all you had to do was smile gratefully, make him tea and it felt like all his efforts in winning your affections reversed into your favor — wooing him instead.

“Boss, have you tried… confronting the bull head on?” Ekaterina sipped on her tea as she looked at her boss with mild disdain, which is justifiable, considering that Andrei would always pass him off to her in his heartbroken rants about you.

A resounding groan left Childe’s lips as he slumped over the table with a lack of grace. He looked up at the bank’s receptionist and glared at her, “Mind your words. He is not a bull.” He said in defense of you, completely missing his subordinate’s point. “He’s more like a… a stallion that I would ri—”

“I will turn in my resignation if you continue that sentence, boss.” Ekaterina says with much defiance. The determination to just resign and perhaps get hired by you instead sounds lovely. Granted, she’d still see Childe and his insufferable pining soul, but she would be busy enough tending to other people to notice him… not to be the catch basin of this man-child’s flooding love troubles.

His blue eyes flitted from corner to corner, eyes narrowing at any unsuspecting man or woman that dared to make a move on you. He was always on the guard, but if anything, if he took Ekaterina’s little piece of advice, he would’ve had no worries. You would reject people with that kind smile of yours and politely tell them off with a claim that you finally have someone else.

Ugh. And you would look so cute with his family too! Teucer made another unprecedented excursion two months ago and was relatively surprised that his big brother made an investment on a teahouse. The way you tended to his little brother like a good big brother or even a father made him feel weak in the knees. Though it wasn’t as fun when Teucer had to be convinced to head back to their motherland, it endeared Childe to see a side of you that rarely comes out unless in the company of the little ones.

The way you acted now was a stark contrast compared to when you and him met. You were mischievous and playful on the first few months in his company, but it was the surface that he was slowly chipping away at — only appreciating your much deeper layers when he saw you fight for your freedom against an undesired matrimony that was being pushed on you. You worked with persistence and diligence in your name and Childe could not get more hot and bothered.

You were so inexplicably interesting. It was no wonder he was just one of the many people who were hoping to have a shot with you — that quiet teahouse owner in the outskirts of the harbor. Hell, even he had to meet that fellow hydro vision and bow user lady twice as she convinced you to come down and work in her establishment.

Childe’s eyes narrowed at the thought of her luring you into her web. Though he knows she means it as a literal job offer at the teahouse and nothing more, he couldn’t shake off the way your eyes seemed to soften around her, growing relatively fond of her appearance.

The harbinger decides that the day Yelan starts to bring in gifts, is the day he urges a business relocation. Maybe somewhere in Wuwang Hill. Anywhere but here.

It also didn’t help that one of your regulars was the charming former archon. He either came alone or brought his tiny superior with him. And on the off chance that Childe comes to pass by, he could see the way you seemed so engaged with the old man, leaning closer as he told his life stories from a thousand years ago, meriting him a melodious laugh that Childe couldn’t hear from the outside.

And while he adored the traveler, he also didn’t like that they’ve been trying to nestle themselves into your cozy abode like a love tick. And it drove him over the edge when you, ever the generous man that you are, would treat them to a cup of tea, free of charge. Like, that was a lost revenue, you annoyingly attractive and scrumptious airhead! That could have been profit!

You are denser than the muscles Childe would subtly feel out in his tight hugs with you. It was annoying. You’re annoying. It’s annoying. He hates it.

He hates you.

“Oh dear, you don’t look too good, Ajax.”

His eyes snapped open as he felt your hands raking through his ginger hair. He almost sobbed at your gentle touch, just going through with ease. He looked ahead to see Ekaterina missing, and from his peripherals, he could see her pouring herself another fresh pot of tea. Ah. Now that he noticed, the teahouse is now quiet, completely void of customers. He supposed it’s already your closing time.

“Had a tough day at work.” He mumbled.

“No, he didn’t.” Ekaterina’s voice echoed from and Childe only huffed.

Laughter rumbled from somewhere deep in your chest and Childe had to restrain himself from just ambushing you with something that he deems as the deciding moment of your relationship. He’s normally impatient, often just wanting to go at it bare hands. Heck, if stated otherwise in a mission, he would directly make contact and fight off the opponent.

But this isn’t a fight. It’s love. It’s raw attraction towards you and for once, Childe who had the boyish charm that could make everyone drop to their knees was at loss.

“Go back to the bank, Ekaterina,” Childe grumbled as he finally sat up from his seat, looking at his subordinate with a pout. “Andrei would scold you.”

“Andrei pays me double to stay with you.”

“I wish Andrei would also pay me double for putting up with him,” you sighed and he almost choked on his own spit, hitting your torso with a glare. You may be dense to his advances, but you still displayed a teasing disposition that no one is safe from. Not even poor him.

He huffed, crossing his arms, “I can just as easily pull out as this teahouse’s investor, y’know? Watch your words, [Name].” His threat was light and empty, and you knew as well — much to his chagrin. “I mean it,” he added for extra measure.

You only gave him a light hum and nodded along, “Of course you do,” your words were in agreement, and yet it only served to invalidate his empty threat towards you. “So, would you like a refill?” You asked, cocking your head in Ekaterina’s direction, who still had a hand on the pot. You were sure she’s gone through about half of it already since the moment she got a hand on it.

Childe’s breath suddenly got caught in his throat as he watched the setting sun’s rays illuminate through your form from the window. You looked absolutely breathtaking and suddenly, the moment felt right. You were only a few inches away, but as his foot moved to take a step, he felt restricted, bound by the chains of uncertainty as he watched you take a step away, your distance growing by a foot. Again, you were a foot away. After he hesitated when he was so close to just… claim you right there.

He coughed before nodding, “Yeah. Sure,” his voice, painfully stiff and strained.

The harbinger was quick to blame it on the fact that Ekaterina didn’t leave you two alone for some space.

But he knows that she was hardly the reason, not when his heart thudded with regret as he watched you walk over to his subordinate and wrestle the pot away from her. Not when his heart continued to hammer against his chest as his emotions went into another overdrive of absolute adoration.

Not when he can finally feel the chains loosen against his heart when he finally, absolutely without a doubt realized you truly were the one.

#i regret making this #i broke my childe hate oath #jk JAJDKSMDC #childe will forever pine that’s the only saving grace in this fic #there was a first version of this where reader is a manwhore #but eh i want something cute #because childe aint cute #genshin impact x male reader #childe x male reader #tartaglia x male reader #jhuzen’s stupid one shots

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thatoneluckybee · 2 months

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My teeth 😧

Fun Fact you can sometimes tell a bunny's mood from their teeth sounds. If they chatter or grind their teeth very loudly it can mean something is stressing them out. But if they're very softly or quietly chattering or grinding their teeth that's similar to a kitty purr, it shows that they're content! It's a bit freaky to hear at first but it's so silly and sweet to see bunnies just chilling in their little rabbit heaps chattering their teeths.

If you wanna see a really happy bunny PLEASE look up "rabbit binky." It's when they do the little jump-kick thing while runnibang when they're really excited it is ADORABLE and one of my favorite things EVER.

#Asks #bunny #anonymous #Bunnies are so expressive it's silly #They also hold grudges. Badly.#One of my show bunnies thumped at me THRICE a couple days ago because I had to interrupt his snack time to weigh and pose him.#He was NOT happy with me he very much wanted to return to the food. I think I have been forgiven but he still fights me. He's not even #Angry at me. He just really wants his food and he wants it THEN impatient little turd #They're cute so they get a free pass. But RUDE #Buddy I gotta do this to make sure you are HEALTHY!!! That's the whole point! I am TRYING TO MAKE SURE YOU AINT GONNA DIE #PLEASE. CHILD. CHILL.#They're so silly I love them

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daddyisastateofmind · 9 months

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The Duke and Duchess attend the Monarchal summit

*tug tug*

"Darlin'"

*tug tug*

"Darlin'"

*tug tug*

Sam reached over and placed his hand on Darlin's hand where it was currently fiddling with their sleeve. "Darlin', look at me."

With a huff, Darlin's eyes looked up to Sam.

He struggled to withhold the smile tugging at his lips. His Darlin' was so cute when they were pouting, but Sam knew voicing that wouldn't help at this moment.

"You look wonderful Darlin'. You don't need to try and improve on perfection."

"I feel like I'm playing dress up."

"Well, you are. But so will everyone else. And they'll look way more ridiculous than you will ever feel."

Darlin' purposefully put their hands on their knees and hooked their nails into their skin to stop fidgeting. "Shoulda just sent Milo in my place. Or his mate. They both took way too much glee in treating me like a living, breathing barbie doll."

Sam smiled "Well, you don't look like a barbie right now."

"No, but that's only because I had to get out a colour wheel and show them exactly which colours they were limited to."

Sam chuckled and took one of their hands into his own. "I'm guessing that was a small amount of colours to choose from."

"Yeah, apparently too small according to them. But we ended up in a compromise - colours found in abundance in nature" They lifted their other hand and waved it over their outfit. "That's how they ended up on this. They said the category was 'Peacock Eleganza Extravaganza'"

He cocked his head to the side and ran his eyes over the outfit "Huh, you do look a little bird-ish."

Darlin' had only begun to rant "I would have looked much worse if Milo had his way - he wanted to attach actual peacock feathers to me."

Sam tried not to giggle at the thought of his Darlin' covered in feathers. "Thank god you talked him outta that."

"I didn't though!" they exploded "He insisted that the feathers were part of his vision! He only relented when his mate said that he was being too costume-y."

Sam couldn't help but giggle now.

"But then," they continued "their suggestion was to get a live peacock and walk it around on a leash all night instead! Thank god they couldn't find one to rent at the last minute. I walked out of the room as they were trying to figure out what exactly the legal repercussions would be if they were caught breaking into the zoo and stealing one."

Sam groaned around a grin "Menaces. You're a pack full of menaces."

Darlin' admired Sam's face for a second - he looked gorgeous when he lit up like that. But soon after the anxiety started to bite again.

"You know I don't belong here Sam" they said softly, scared to say it out loud.

Sam's eyes softened "In the limo?"

"Going to the summit." they tried to pull their hand out from Sam's, but he just squeezed his grip on them tighter. "This isn't me - the fanciest I get is putting on slacks and having dinner at Olive Garden." Their tone went quiet again "I'm not gonna fit in there...with them."

If there was one thing in the world Sam hated, it was the look on Darlin's face when they were insecure. They were such a strong presence - give them a task to complete and their gaze would harden and their lips pulled into a stoic grimace. Even when facing someone twice their size, they stood tall and straight, confident that they could take them on.

But insecure Darlin'? With their eyes big and soft, looking up to Sam like a little lost child? It damn near broke his heart.

"That'll make us the 2 outsiders tonight. I'm a hick from no-one-cares-ville. I've never had to - never needed - to blend in with that kinda crowd. And I aint gonna lie to you love - there are those who don't think I deserve to breathe the same air as them. But I never took that as a reason to change myself for them." He let go of their hand and put his arm around their shoulders.

"All you got to do is be yourself Darl'. That's all I ever want you to be." He placed a light kiss right in the middle of their forehead, and then tucked their head onto his shoulder.

Sam put on a smooth charming drawl "If you want, I could always tell William that we're not going to-"

Darlin' pulled away from him "No, Sam."

"But-"

"I said no. William invited me-"

Sam rolled his eyes "It's possible to decline a invitation Darlin'"

"Not when it was a literal gold engraved invitation, it isn't," Sam had to remind himself that it wasn't appropriate at his age to stomp his feet like a child.

"Besides, he was nice enough to invite me as part of the clan, even though I have no claim to it. I have to go."

Sam glanced at them and saw them school their expression into one of determination. "I'm going." Their voice sounded confident, but he could still see a glimpse of that lost little child in their eyes.

The limo turned a driveway and joined the queue of fancy sport cars and other limos dropping off their passengers.

"Well, if we're going, then I suppose I have to tell you something."

Darlin' responded but they were looking out the windscreen to the huge mansion they were getting closer to. "What's that?"

"But you have to promise me this never reaches the pack." That had them direct their focus straight at Sam.

"What is it?"

He grimaced and rubbed his chin. "You know how William's the king of the clan?"

"Yeah."

"And Alexis and Vincent are his progenies?"

'Yes Sam, I pay attention."

"Well, that means they get to be called the princess and prince of the clan."

"O...k... Wait, are you a pr-"

"No, nope, I'm not a prince." Sam shook his head vehemently.

The limo was inching closer to the door now - only 1 car ahead of them.

"So what are you trying to tell me?"

Was Sam sweating? He felt like he was sweating, but when he wiped his hand against his forehead, it came up dry. Gods, this was so hard. "Since I am the progeny of a king's progeny, that makes me..."

"Makes you?"

A valet opened up the door next to Sam, who took this opportunity to rush out the next words. "Well Darlin', that makes me a duke."

He quickly stepped out of the limo. Standing there, adjusting his jacket, he waited for his mate to emerge. And he waited. And he waited.

He was about to duck back inside, when Darlin finally exited the vehicle. With the biggest shit eating grin he's ever seen.

With a high put upon voice his meemaw would have described as 'hoity-toity', they slipped their arm through his and announced loudly "Come Samuel, I am absolutely famished, and I long to tell Jemima about our summer in the Hamptons."

Sam mouthed "Jemima?" as he was dragged into the mansion on Darlin's arm.

He had a feeling, even if Darlin' hid this little fact from the rest of their pack, he was going to be the butt of many jokes for years to come. But it was worth it - the delight they had his expense meant they spent the whole evening with a huge smile on their face.

Sometimes Sam was sad about his turning - how his previous life was snatched away, and then was bestowed a life he never wanted. But he saw the silver lining sometimes. If he hadn't been turned, he might have not met his Darlin'. And might not have their sparkling eyes as they introduced themselves as the mate of the Duke of the Solaire clan to as many as people as possible - taking much pleasure in pointing to Sam "That one. That one there. He's the Duke of the Solaire clan."

Sam congratulated himself for not wearing his crown tonight. He wouldn't want Darlin' to pull a muscle laughing at him.

#redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted darlin #redacted sam #redacted tank #fanfic #lol duke collins

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quitealotofsodapop · 7 months

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Oh my gods, all the Wukongs see Hero!Liuer and go "Master? Tiny Master? TINY TRIPITAKA!"

Liuer has no idea what's going on but he is delighted. Especially when he meets the big MKs.

Hero!Liuer wanders into a multi-dimensional SWK/Monkey King meeting and the room just zeros in on him.

LMK!SWK: "Oh my buddha, it's a mini-Tang!!!" <3

Reborn!SWK: "Is he Master Sanzang as a child? He has the soul mark of the Cicada."

NewGods!SWK: "He's got chubby cheeks ripe for pinching, thats what he's got!"

NetflixSWK: *incomprehensible baby talk*

2000sCartoon!SWK: "Eh!? Another Master Tripitaka? But this one's so small!" •^•

Meihouwang!SWK & LEM: "I dunno who Tripitaka is, but this one looks fun!" "Why is your name Six Eared?"

Smash!SWK: "Whoa! Trips got shrunk!" :O!

HeroIsBack!SWK is proudly showing off his tudi/adoptive son to all who wishes to see.

Liuer is def mothered/fathered by all the older SWKs. He's so small! And excited to be here with all the different Monkey Kings! Netflix!SWK and Smash!SWK treat him more like a little brother, the latter calling him "squirt" unironically. Liuer is really confused around 2000sCartoon!SWK because the brunette monkey keeps treating him like he's a wisened monk.

Meihouwang treat Liuer like a new playmate, taking him on their explorations around the different Flower Fruit Mountains. He's declared an "honorary Flower Fruit monkey!" and they try drawing face markings onto him.

Liuer meets MK; who immediately offers to show Liuer his Monkey King biography - Liuer accepts immediately and is blown away by the artwork and the things Monkey King has done "in the future"! MK and Mei unofficially deem Liuer their Little Bro. They talk for so long about their worlds & legends that MK forgets to mention that he inherited SWK's powers.

Then Liuer meets other *hims*?! Who are (mostly) all Great Monks and sages?! :O!

This happy little monk boy is in heaven.

The other Tripitakas adore Liuer; seeing him as a younger, more heroic version of themselves.

LMK Tang endears himself to Liuer with his storytelling and fatherly attitude - but Liuer is the sorta kid to loudly call out adults "doing things wrong". Example; "Mr Tang, monks aren't supposed to eat meat.", "Mr Tang, the Buddha hears all your swears.", "Mr Tang, you have to pay for your food." etc... so Tang tries to adjust his behaviour to set a good example. Nevermind that he isn't a buddhist monk - but he aint telling them that. XD

2000sCartoon!Tripitaka: "Brother Tang, it is improper for a monk to consume alcohol..."

LMK!Tang: *about to continue drinking anyway*

Liuer: "Mr Tang, sifu Fa says baijiu makes it harder for Buddha to hear us..."

LMK!Tang, mock surprise: "Eh?! I didn't know that. Thank you for warning me mini-sage!" *pours drink back into bottle*

Liuer: :D!

Other Tripitakas: "Oh, he's good at this." "I can barely get Bajie to stop stealing food..."

The reaction from the Macaques are... lukewarm at best like with the other monks. The ones who dont have beef with Tripitaka just see him as a cute kid, while the ones who've tried making monk kebabs feel really awkward around Liuer. He also sets off the older Mac's parental instincts, so he gets son-coded immediately.

He's their perfect little monk boy, and they'll kill anyone who poses a threat to his childhood wonder.

#wukongverse #lego monkie kid #lmk #monkey king hero is back #jiang liuer #monkey king reborn #new gods nezha reborn #journey to the west: legends of the monkey king #journey to the west #meihouwang #the monkey king netflix #smash legends #sun wukong #lmk tripitaka #lmk tang #lmk tang sanzang

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viandclintbarton-supremacy · 7 months

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My Kliq of Footballers

"Kliq" = Group of friends who have each others back and won't let harm come to their friends and always support each other.

If i had a Kliq of only me and 8 others

Lucy Bronze

"mine are all natural" You eyed roll at Lucy's response as you compared each others abs. You look at your abs then Lucy's then yours. "THAT AINT NATURAL LUCY!"

Jack Grealish

"AndiwaslikewaHEYYYYYYY" Your eye twitched as you hear Jack mumble and slur his speech through the phone.".........ya drunk again ain't ya" you hear a giggle before Jack hangs up

Millie Bright

"THIS IS MY Y/N, THERE ARE MANY LIKE IT BUT THIS ONE IS MINE" Millie would shout and she carried you on her shoulders and running around with you much to your dismay "MANY LIKE ME!? BITCH IM AUTHENTIC" You would say with dignity

Kyle Walker

"Come on Y/N, you can surely keep up?" He shouted to you with a smug look after beating you in a race. You sigh "Lad you run faster then my dad did after i was born" You said in a nonchalant voice but joking manner but the words making Kyle take a double take and not sure if you said was a joke or not

Mariona Caldentey

"Y/N!!!" You are blindsided by a hyper Mariona Caldentey hugging you as you entered the room "READY FOR THE NEW SEASON" She screamed right in your ear. "C.....can......can't bb....breath"

Phil Foden

"Stop it Phill" you say to the man standing behind, feeling him giving that signature look "I'm not doing anything. Just please don't get another card, we need you out here. "1. I'll try and 2." You turn to the young man "SEE I KNEW IT!! YOU GIVING ME YOUR DISSAPOINTED DAD LOOK!!"

Lauren Hemp

"Such a interesting creature" You said as you pet the kolala that Hemp was holding "Right they are so cute" You smirked "I wasn't talking about the kolala Hempy. Hemp gave your are shocked look and then handed off the Kolala to the keeper "It was a joke Hemp. It WAS A JOKE, A JOKE!" *Smack* "AHH"

Heung Min Son

"YAAAAAAA!" "JESUS CHRIST SON" You jumped out of your skin because of Son's scream, You turned to the man. Who just ran past you as he ran down the hall into the darkness. "Maybe bringing him to a horror maze wasn't the best option" as you walked down the hall, just then a scare actor jumped out to scare you but you were unfazed "Hello, I lost my korean child, have you seen him?"

This was completey random and just wrote it now. Let me know what you think and go ahead and do your own versions and tag me. I wanna see them!!

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bigdsgirl · 5 months

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episode 10 goodies

Yi Joo at the Shareholder meeting #baddie

Step mommy getting kicked the EFF OUT! HELL YEAH

he's going AFTER HER FOR her!!!!

Do Guk's deep breath when the hitman tells him step mommy's plan -- I was hoping he would go feral, but this is better hehe

the Seo family debrief -- and the hand hold! and Jung Wook feel like a shit person! because you are ah ha!

him complimenting her paintings BYE

HE HAS THE PAINTING

HE'S HUGGING HER BYE

i want to - oh my gosh this man is overJOYED

the shot of the wrists! the hands!

him. sitting on the bed. with the pillow. why was that blurred. WHY. I WANT IT.

"I'm saying you look prettier every time I look at you" BYE.

A CHILD AT LEAST 2??????? JASGKLADFJGLKADFJGALKDF

Bro his reasoning for having a child???? I want to die they are so freaking cute.

oh SHE AINT SAYING NO!

my beloved psychiatrist is back. ily babes. And she's here dropping bombs on him. (and now I am worried, for I know what is coming)

me watching Yoo Ra gasp:

everything Do Guk does (i just watched him lean back for goodness sake), has such BD energy and i love it.

"She couldn't have a baby without telling me" -- you sure about that king! she's right there!

WAIT HIS DAD IS ALIVE I KNEW IT I KNEW IT! (this is me speculating, but idc, i think it's real)

Yoo Ra and Step mommy's confrontation has one of my fac instrumentals omg !!!!

THE MUSIC CHANGE YASSSSSS

Oh Yoo Ra is maaaaaaaaad

power couple is powering!!!!! lfg!!!

Yoo Ra babe, pls don't eat paper

DO NOT HIT HER WITH THE CAR SIR. DO NOT.

WAIT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BABE RUNNNNNNN

no put the halo back, what happens next!!!!!!!!!!

the betrayal is coming and fuck i am not prepared - but so much cute content!! in bed!! hugging!!! uuuggggghhhh

#perfect marriage revenge #heidi watches perfect marriage revenge #pmr #kdrama

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fruitsoxs · 10 months

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Okokok I am here with a request:

Hear me out: Wolfwood x Reader where the reader and Wolfwood adopt a little one,,,

I swear to God, it'd be so soft and precious,,,

Thank you :D

ahhhh this is so cute. thank you!!

pairings; wolfwood x (GN)reader warnings; none notes; ive had an idea like this brewing in my brain for a awhile so i'm glad i had a reason to finally write it out! thank you!

His eyes trail across the cobblestone floors, landing on a particular pair who seem to be having the time of their lives. A crooked smile rests across his lips as he watches you play with the little boy that has grown quite attached to you. The kid is hanging off your back as you run around in a circle. The kid is giggling like a maniac, and you’ve got your own smile on your face.

He was sure it would be a mistake bringing you to see his old orphanage. He regretted it the moment the offer left his mouth, and your eyes lit up. He wasn’t sure how’d you react to his old home, or if you’d get along with everyone. You’re his favorite person in the world, and he couldn’t imagine what would happen if this all went wrong. But it didn’t.

Apparently, you’re really good with kids.

Maybe this was a mistake, because Wolfwood can’t stop staring at you as you play around. He can’t stop thinking that this all feels a little too right. After years of hard work, was it finally time for him to settle down with you? He looks over at your cute smiling face, and his heart clenches in his chest. He wants that. He wants it so bad, he’d drop everything now and adopt that child on the spot.

He pushes himself off the wall he was leaning on, and makes his way over to you. As soon as you see him, your smile breaks out into a large grin. You wave at him as he nears you, the child still hanging onto your neck.

“You look like you’re having fun.” he chuckles, resting his hands in the pockets of his pants. You smile sheepishly and shrug your shoulders. “This kid’s got a whole lotta energy.” you respond, hiking the kid higher onto your back. The kid giggles and presses his head into the back of your shoulder. Wolfwood finds his heart beating a little faster at the scene.

“Oh yeah?” Wolfwood mumbles moving so he’s eye level with the kid. “And what are you playing?” he asks. The kid grins a toothless grin. “We’re playing cowboys. I’m an outlaw-” The kid explains shooting off a pretend gun. “And I’m a horse-” you add on, laughing. Wolfwood can’t hold back the chuckle that escapes his throat.

“Well you know, every outlaw needs a sheriff to chase him.” Wolfwood tells the kid, grinning. He steps back and makes a gun with his fingers. “Put ‘em up!” He says dramatically, pointing his finger gun at the kid. The kid squeals happily as you start running from Wolfwood.

The three of you play around for a little bit, with wolfwood pretending to chase the boy. You end up putting the kid down and stepping back for a second to catch your breath, watching as the two continue playing on their own. The boy seems to be having more fun now than ever, and Wolfwood can’t help but feel like this is right.

The kid shouts out a few “Bangs!” and Wolfwood pretends he’s hit, putting a hand over his heart and collapsing onto the ground. “You got me kid-” he gasps dramatically. “You’re too good of a shot-” The kid laughs and runs off to continue playing with a few other kids that have joined in on the game.

Your head appears above Wolfwood, a hand held out offering to help him stand. He takes it and allows you to help pull him back onto his feet. When he’s up, he puts an arm around you and pulls you against his side as the two of you watch the kids play.

“They’re pretty cute, aren’t they?” you point out, resting your head on his shoulder. He smiles and nods. “Maybe we should take one home.” He finally says out loud. There’s a beat of silence before you turn to him with wide eyes. “Don’t joke-”

“I aint joking.” He cuts you off, a soft look upon his features. He reaches out to cup your cheek with his hand. “Seeing you running around with that kid- It had me thinking. Maybe it’s time?” he starts, staring into your eyes. “Maybe it’s time we settle down. For good. Just me, you…and the kid.” He smiles as he traces your cheek with his thumb.

You seem completely awestruck- but your shocked expression morphs into a smile and you nod. Tears start to gather in your eyes as you lean forward and press your lips against his softly. “I would love that.” You whisper as you pull away.

He pulls you into a hug with a smile. He can't wait to start a family with you.

#wolfwood x reader #nicholas d wolfwood x reader #wolfwood x you #wolfwood x y/n #wolfwood fluff

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dearest-painter · 1 year

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Yandere Johnny with a teen dad!Greaser!Reader

Summary:Johnny’s childhood friend and right hand man may or may not be his secret lover who he wants the whole school to know that’s HIS man(Headcanons and oneshot)

TW/CW:Yandere behavior,Gary being a hypocrite,unhealthy behavior, unhealthy relationship,abusive behavior,abusive relationship,mentions of fights,Reader’s baby mama is unknown but it’s mentioned that their in great terms,Reader’s daughter is named Tallulah and if your asking where I got it from it’s from QMSP bc I’ve seen edits and honestly love the name!,Johnny and Reader are dating in this but try and make it hidden to anyone outside of their group,VERY OCC CHARACTERS BC JOHNNY IN THE GAME CARES MOSTLY FOR LOLA BUT IN THIS HES VERY POSSESSIVE OF READER!,Its implied that Lola has hit on reader,if I need to add more please do tell me

A/N:Yes I’m using the same gif and I’m gonna do one more person then make it into a series!

-Loves you to dying bits! Literally is the most affectionate with you in private as Bullworth is very homophobic because everyone is a fucker

-Everyone in the greasers respect you as they know your their bosses man and that he’s overprotective and has made multiple examples out of people who bad mouthed you or Tallulah

-He’s literally held himself from attacking Lola when she’s tried to flirt with you. The way she’s touched you pissed him off but he couldn’t do shit because they had to fake date just to hide your twos relationship…for a while

-He literally made sure tallulah called him dada so he can be a father figure in her life.

-He truly does love you even if he can be a bit insane to the point the townies and other groups think twice about flirting or hitting on you because of the amount of people he’s beaten because of that

-You two have your own hideout so basically it’s like y’all’s home because you all basically live there! There’s you and Johnny’s shared room and Tallulah’s. Honestly anyone walking in at first glance think you two are married

-The rest of the greasers are yanderes as well,they love you (either romantic or platonic is up to you) as much as their boss does! They literally make sure no one ruins yours,Tallulah’s,or Johnny’s name

-They will fight Lola or get some other chick to fight her if she tries shit. Lola aint safe.

- “Dada!!” Johnny smiled at the running 5 year old girl wearing a cute little greaser dress theme. “Heya princess! Did you or daddy chose this theme?” “I did! I wanted to match with daddy and dada! He said it was hard to find a dress version but he did it!” Johnny never stopped smiling as he picked up Tallulah. She adores the greaser theme and often wanted to wear some but it was hard to make her actually stay looking like a child so it took some time. “Where’s daddy?” Tallulah pointed to Norton and you talking. “Daddy said he’s planning you a surprise!” “Oh really? Can you tell me more hun?” “Nu uh! It a surprise and secret!” Johnny chuckled.

-He hates how Jimmy and Gary try and get with you,he trusted Jimmy but he doesn’t now after he found out he’s after his man! Gary!? Oh don’t get him started on Gary! That fucker trying to own you like an object!? He is so close to killing them both and presenting you their hearts to show you that your his! That no one can steal you!

#yandere #please don’t do this #obession #unhealthy #romantic yandere #yandere bully #male reader #x male!reader #yandere x male reader #x male reader #teenage parent reader #teen parent reader #yandere romantic #yandere romance #yandere headcanons #yandere oneshot #💭yandere headcanons♥️#💭yandere headcannons♥️

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tecchous-thicc-buttocks · 7 months

Note

Do you have any bsd headcannons you'd like to share? (literally anything, I just love learning about other peoples hcs)

OMG YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES SORRY FOR RESPONDING SO LATE IVE BEEN USING THIS IN MY DRAFTS AS A COLLECTION OF JUST ABOUT ANYTHING THAT GOES THRU MY MIND AND I'VE JUST DECIDED I'M GONNA POST IT ALR

chuuya's hat is so old (bc it keeps getting passed from person to person and he brings it with him everywhere obviously) and WORN OUT but he has no idea how to fix it. he treats it like his child but it's inevitable that the material will deteriorate over time, so he's been trying to convince himself to go to a hatter for ages and can't swallow his pride. he drunkenly told it to hirotsu once night while they were drinking, and hirotsu just sighed and got it fixed for him that night while chuuya was passed out. they never spoke about it.

dazai has met several women who actually did say yes to a double suicide. the majority didn't mean it and just wanted to toy with him, but ran when they realized he was serious. a few actually did mean it. he pulled strings and invited them to a romantic date, except that he sent therapists there instead of him, basically playing matchmaker. all those women are now doing better but ask him about it and he'll act dumb and say he knows nothing about it.

fyodor needs glasses. his eyesight definitely sucks and the hours he spends at a computer don't help. however, he manipulates himself into thinking that he's actually fine when he's not. nikolai also has shitty eyesight bc of his dull eye and the other one he's probably abused looking at the birds in the sky and thus the sun. they are literally the blind leading the blind. nikolai places his portal 2 meters from where he meant to put it and fyodor says "good job". it's incredible how they're feared terrorists.

sigma gets tired wearing heels all day. he wants memory foam but doesn't know it exists. give him his goddamn memory foam. anyways one of his employees saw him holding his feet in pain and offered him orthopedic shoe inserts. he hasn't been the same since. would give them a raise if he knew how.

tachihara used to get acne from having his bandage on his nose all day. so, he's developed an incredibly rigid skin care routine. his face is soft as hell. cheeks are smoother than you'd think.

kouyou made it her first demand as executive to raid her favourite shop where she gets all her kiminos and accessories. hirotsu led the black lizard battalion into the shop and the workers were so fucking confused. stole expensive silk fabrics and clothing of the highest quality because she doesn't settle for less, and in the process has gotten hirotsu more into fashion. they go shopping together.

speaking of shopping, kajii only goes thrifting. have you seen his clothes?? they're not his size and torn as hell but they're so damn cheap he can't resist. his sandals are so goddamn iconic. yeah he's blowing you up but his dogs are OUT like a mf psychopath. i maybe love him a little too much.

ivan has greasy hair. while doing his surgery thing wtv tf that was, fyodor was continually grossed out (ironic aint it). pushkin was then ordered to help ivan wash his hair and they died just a little bit. neither knew what the difference between shampoo and conditioner is, and they struggled with it for a long time. eventually when they came back for fyodor to do the surgery, ivan's hair smelled like flowers and was braided cutely because they gave up and went to a salon where the people working there fell a little in love with his hair and went overboard. pushkin's hair (if you can call it that...) was also in a little bowtie. they enjoyed their little adventure just a little bit. just a little ofc.

odasaku has no idea how to cook curry. he loves it and fears doing it wrong, so he just buys it from the same place over and over. considered asking for the recipe but never did because why change what is already perfection. dazai however is convinced oda has housewife abilities and can cook like a god. he never knew the truth.

fitzgerald can't do math. he pretends he's good at converting currencies but in his head it just doesn't add up. 20 000 yen? that's like.... 5 freedom eagles obviously. no biggie *throws a bunch of american dollars at the workers and just takes the item and leaves* he also doesn't give tips when it prompts on the machine, and instead prefers sliding a crisp bill to them directly. cried a little when his favourite shop told him they ran out of an item he wanted and they didn't budge after he slid them a stack of 100s (he has no idea how many were in the stack)

fitzgerald also owns an airline but he doesn't manage it personally ofc. his only interaction with it is that they provide him and the guild with a private jet to travel to japan. lovecraft did not get on. he swam??? who knows, but he did not get on that plane. lucy got sick and louisa freaked out every time there was turbulence. mark was snoring loudly the entire way and steinbeck had his nose pressed on the window looking outside the entire time the lil cutie.

agatha has the super power of drinking tea while it is still piping hot. she never burns her tongue and never complained about its temperature, except when it's too cold. the water was literally boiling once (her subordinates wanted to find out how hot she can go) and she gulped it all down without a single contortion of her face. incredible.

shirase doesn't understand english and keeps trying to learn it but every time he thinks he's getting the hang of it, someone throws cockney slang at him and he gives up.

adam finally figured out how to blow a bubble of gum, but keeps swallowing it. one day, it clogged his internal system (he's not supposed to be eating obvi) and he's been afraid of it ever since. thinks it's possessed by evil spirits his android brain can't understand. i also hc that he recharges thru solar panels integrated onto his skin and for this reason he goes to the beach to 'tan' often. HE'S SO PALE people get a little concerned for him when they see him not apply sunscreen and just lay down for hours at a time. one lady actually told him he could get skin cancer and he opened his eyes "ackshually 🤓👆" then began reciting every fact known to man about skin cancer. rip that lady

verlaine and rimbaud complain about france all the time. "fuck france i fucking hate the french this country goddamn sucks" then as soon as someone else says anything bad about it they give them death glares and threaten death for disrespecting their country.

wells has memorized a whole lot of things about quantum theory from her days studying to be an engineer because it was her favourite class. she cannot handle mechanical or civil engineering topics and physically ascends at the mention of anything to do with dynamics. i also think she's been hit on a lot while wearing disguises; she tells them she's actually a woman, they freak out, then she sends them back in time. this time, they do not approach her and thus she doesn't have to deal with the awkward rejection and doesn't even remember it.

jules verne has made little dolls and pretended that they were his friends and invented scenarios in which they hung out. i will not elaborate on this.

albatross sometimes interrupts conversations in order to listen to the engine of a vehicle passing by. tries to track them down, too. he'll be the type of guy to ogle at your car without making eye contact with you while you're still in the car. and when i say ogle, i mean ogle. checks out motorcycles more often than women.

the flags bully lippmann sometimes when he acts in a really cheesy scene. he's coming to hang out with them and they're all giggling and chuckling at him stupidly. albatross walks up to him, tucks his hair behind his ear and whispers whatever cheesy thing was said in a low voice before bursting out laughing (he usually starts laughing before he can even finish the sentence). pianoman slides it slickly into conversations, and doc 'fufu's at random moments when looking at him and he suddenly remembers the scene. iceman has not watched the movie and chuuya couldn't care less.

the first time he tried to take the train, ranpo loudly exclaimed and yelled at every turn and stop of the train. he went during rush hour too and got his entire body smooshed into the strangers next to him. he squealed when someone accidentally (accidentally) grabbed his ass in the crowded traincar, then asked loudly who did that. dramatic as hell. got his pockets picked and knew who did it, but couldn't do anything about it. he felt awful and slumped his way back home and collapsed into yosano's arms with a groan. this was the only time she'd ever willingly bought him a bunch of sweets and let him eat them in peace while he ranted to her about the atrocities

kenji is more notorious on the streets than he knows. he got recognized by some huge 200cm tall man built like a goddamn tank with tattoos all over his body who wanted to fight him. kenji was so flattered that he knew his name that he thanked him and burly dude was like. wtf. anyways they got beef ramen together afterwards bonded over cows and are now besties. he's told the agency about it but they think that by "friend" he means someone else his age.

tanizaki ran into kajii once at his favourite thrift shop. he recognized him and ran out freaked never to return. for this reason he had to keep wearing his same stanky ahh uwu girl clothes that don't fit and hasn't had a style update. actually, when doing his research for how to infiltrate the mafia, tachihara found out that there have been a lot of sightings of known dangerous ability users in the thrift store, and that's why he wears the same shirt as tanizaki.

tachihara dreads the hunting dogs meetings because they make him feel like the only sane one there. his back has become so chiseled from carrying teruko around all the time, and once - jouno thought it would be funny - he tripped on a wire laying down on the ground and almost dropped her. he had to use his ability to pick her up from the belt of the uniform to prevent her from faceplanting, and she looked like she was about to explode. he had to let her beat him up a little then she hopped back on his shoulders and nothing changed. he questions his life choices often

jouno can't handle cinnamon or ginger scents, they overwhelm him and he goes into a fucking sensory overload coma. odor orgasm. sinus sex. teruko got sick once and tachi made her the strongest herbal and ginger tea you've ever seen (learnt it from his brother rip the goat) and he collapsed on the ground with a moan. woke up a half hour layer with no clue wth just happened. tecchou eventually heard about it, placed a hand on his shoulder and said "it happens to the best of us" while nodding solemnly then never elaborated.

yeah fukuchi and fukuzawa used to steal food when they were younger but imagine them figuring out milestones together. "dude my armpits are itchy where is this hair coming from :(" "genichiro i don't need to know about that *scratches at his armpit subtly*" i think they were very goofy about it

speaking of puberty elise once freaked mori out by saying she got her period. dude was like. wtf. you're an ability. how tf. she insisted he got her a bunch of tampons n pads and chocolate and heating pads and the works, then once he (the underlings he made go do the shopping threatening their lives if they ever told a soul) bought everything, she looked at his confused and asked why he bought those things. she's an ability how could she have a period? mori cried a little that night.

bram is a swiftie for no reason other than i think it's funny. alternatively, i believe he listens to reggae for no reason other than i think it's goddamn FUNNY.

kunikida's old students sometimes run into him on the street and recognize him. they immediately straighten their backs, nod at him and quickly walk away in the most respectful way because they don't want to ruin his schedule. he nearly tears up from happiness every time.

natsume goes through 5-6 "here, kitty kitty!"s in a day when he's just vibing around. people try to feed him grass blades. people get WAY too comfortable rubbing his stomach. once, a girl saw him on her way back from school and started scratching a random spot behind his ears and he folded so quickly and just melted on the sidewalk. he wont admit it but he has that weak spot in human form too (i want to pet him so badly this is self indulgent ok). the girl was actually gin btw. she's an animal whisperer i dont know why i dont know how but she is.

#im dying just a little because of the way my head is overfilling #i rly hope the anon who asked this is still around to see my answers :sob:#i LOVE making stupidly specific hcs this isn't even the half of it #guys drop your hcs or character you want my hcs for in my inbox!! (i want someone to spam my inbox womp womp)#yeah i spoke a lot about tachi what abt it #i love him a little too much i need someone else with the same level of obsession as me #i want him as an s/o so i'll be immune to bratty vending machines #^^OMG THIS APPEARED WHEN I WAS TYPING TAGS APPARENTLY I ALR WROTE THAT??? it's still true ofc #anyways yes i like to try to cater to most characters bc i'm a sucker for the underrated lomls #i would've slapped you with more lovecraft but i must ease back into writing hcs (i haven't done this in years)#uhhhh yeah #that's all my lil dumpling wumplings idk wtf else to write #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd hcs #bsd headcanons

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unwillingpuckbunny · 11 months

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HELLO! i'm bored of revising so here is a list of (some of the) accounts that i think the world should know about (i really should be revising biology because i have a really big test next week and have done 0 revision please someone shout at me so i'll actually revise coz my adhd really aint helping)

@luvhughes43: your boy can't read - made me legit laugh out loud, dad!Quinn series - adorable, crazy over you - mwah chefs kiss

@babydollmarauders: the media management series - need i say more. if you haven't read it yet what are you doing with your life go read it now, company - so cute, dress - it's taylor swift and jack hughes combined so obviously its good duh

@zeegshughes: these michigan summers - honestly one of the best things i've ever read i live for quinn and libby, her relationship with jack and luke is adorable and i'm always so exited when I see a new chapter (is that the right phrase idk i'm calling it a chapter)

@hockeyandhrsepwr: snap - so cute and the sibling dynamics are top tier

@bagopucks: she's taller - as a certified tall gal i appreciated this fic immensely, single reader series - adorable (can you tell i love a dad!nhl player fic) hudson is so sassy i love him and auston's desperation to be called dad is so heart wrenching just that need to be loved and accepted by this tiny human is portrayed so well i love it, disheveled ducking - so gutwrenchingly sad i had tears in my eyes reading it

@dmercer91 bug's sister series - so funny sibling dynamics on point what more can i say

@jackhues: some of my favourite series ever, mockingbird au - kinda sad but so cute quinn is the biggest sweetheart in this chefs kiss love it, peanut's world au - living for the sibling dynamics in this with auston and mat too it's peanuts world they're just living in it, buttercup's world au - omg i could never speak abt this au enough I love single dad sid in this he is such a girl dad its so cute someone give this man a child I can't wait to see sid as a dad irl

@letsgetrowdy43: my muse - i can't paint for shit but love this little fic i just love an insta edit

@starsandhughes: the penalty box series - one of the funniest things on this app I love it and everyone in the world should read it thank you and goodnight

ok that was a long list but I had things to say

pls send me new fics/accounts to check out bc I hate revising and apparently want to fail (I don't acc want to fail but I need something to do to destress (yeah e keep telling yourself that))

EDIT:

i just realised that there are no jamie fics in any that I recommended and that is a crime

i've read so many good jamie fics but apparently forgot abt them (?)

omg and no luke fics what is going on with me today

#jack hughes #luke hughes #quinn hughes #trevor zegras #cole caufield #nj devils #anaheim ducks #vancouver canucks #sidney crosby #pittsburgh penguins

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ly0nstea · 23 days

Note

Zelbosa, is NOT the “woke” or “best” ship. It is NOT okay.

But, please listen to this, shipping her with Zelda is not okay, Zelda was 16 until the day Urbosa died, and that means she is a MINOR. Urbosa in her diary states that she held Zelda as a baby, and was close friends with her mother the queen who was an adult when she had her daughter, meaning Urbosa was too. Urbosa is an adult, likely in at LEAST her forties, and is also confirmed by the creators to be a stand in mother to her. That also makes this borderline incest. Since this is the case; this ship is both pedophilia, and incest, and a minor legally cannot consent to a relationship with a man adult, that also makes it rape. It is also hugely uncomfortable to have someone raise you and then be in a relationship with them, that doesn’t happen

Look, imagine this. You were held as a baby by an adult woman who played a big role in raising you. You then are a 16 year old who has a MOTHERLY CONNECTION with said woman.

Then people say you should fuck and shit and start shipping you. Pretty disturbing right??

It doesn't matter that they're fictional, that's not an excuse because supporting a minor x adult relationship is still RAPE. A minor cannot consent to ANY relationship with an adult it will always be RAPE.

Anyone who ships Urbosa with Zelda?? That’s not Urbosa buddy. You don’t know shit about who Urbosa is. For one, she is a character from a children’s game and guess what??? Children’s characters don’t fuck!!! Second, Urbosa is a motherly character, and she’s a sweetheart. She doesn’t rape people, and yeah, sex with minors is rape. Third. That’s just. Not Urbosa buddy. Idc what you name her but that piece of shit doesn’t deserve to be compared to Urbosa, it should be put down tbh.

By saying “they’re fictional it doesn’t matter” or “all characters are depicted as 18+”, that is a sorry excuse to “justify” child porn and pedophilia. It doesn’t change the characters, and you still present them as they are in the game. As MINORS. Stating that they’re aged up doesn’t make you any less of a pedo, they’re still minors. Also, if you spend your entire life being raised by someone??? That’s borderline incest. You don’t fuck them. Aging up doesn’t change that.

By shipping this?? You are supporting incest. While Zelda and Urbosa aren’t actually related (still pedophelia btw) it’s still borderline incest as she is explicitly stated to be a stand in MOTHER to her. If you’re one of those FREAKS who thinks incest is qUirKy or HoT. No it’s not. Incest causes genetic defects because it biologically is NOT supposed to happen it isn’t cute or quirky, it is morally wrong and causes harm to both the other person and their offspring if they have any.

If you need an alternative to ship with Urbosa, make an oc for Zelda’s mom!! They were known to be close friend and are a very cute ship

Argue with my mommy issues and projection onto zelda lil bro i aint readin allat

You're just making shit up in your head to get mad at 😭😭

#zelda #princess zelda #legend of zelda #the legend of zelda #urbosa #zelbosa #breath of the wild #botw #loz

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suguru-getos · 2 years

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genshin men and the dates they take you to

characters included: ayato, itto, zhongli, diluc, childe

ayato takes you to simplistic yet extravagant dates. there is a certain dignity and standard he has to maintain as the commissoner sama waka sama after all. mostly he will take you outside of narukami island because he doesn’t want you to continue visiting the restaurants in there right? after the sakoku decree was abolished; the first thing he did was to take you out of inazuma. the exquisite meals of the nations all across tevyat, the cuisines and the specialties, the beautiful scenaries, he wants to witness them all with you. “i may have a long term plan of travelling the world with you, my love. but the thought of your safety stops me…” he muses one day, having you sitting on his lap as he peppers your skin with subtle kisses. no worries though, he ain’t op for nothing eh?

itto is mostly interested in playdates. if you want then you can go have a beetle fight, play cards with him. sometimes he whines and says, “i aint playin’ that game unless you are on my lap uh huh… you heard me!” you have to be on his lap while you two roast lavender melons together. another cute date idea with itto is he lets you paint his markings and horns with a terribly cute flush on his face UuU. would probably steal a kiss or two and force you to ALSO be naked! “hey hey hey hey- be a little honest little one! you saw me half naked it’s my turn!” eventually it turns into heated makeout sessions ;)

zhongli sama morax sama rex lapis sama has taste only for the finest and the most incredible things. he nitpicks things to perfection and eventually makes sure that what he has to offer his beloved lover is exquisite! date nights with him would include sight seeing, he would ensure that when he takes you out for dinner and orders something extremely specific for you; it is done as told. can be a bit stern. “mmm, the taste of this chilli flake isn’t as highly blended as i thought it’d be, apologies. i must have not been as methodical, or certain people lack proper understsnding,” his brows are furrowed but your chuckle as a reaction followed by, “it’s okay, all i care is about us having a great time, your presence, your stories… all of that is more than enough for me,” man you made grandpa geo blush o//o powerful y/n ;)

diluc fatui agent costumed sir:3 likes to sit in the gardens of his home, go on walks with you in the dawn winery. goes wine tasting with you, takes you to dragonspine one day because you wanted to build a snowman ⛄️; takes you to angel’s share after booking the whole place of course. he is very thoughtful and keeps things comfy for you. if he senses the slightest hesitation in your voice towards his ideas, he drops them immediately. “maybe… we can do something else; i see hiking is not one task fit for your liking, after all, what fun could it be if both of us aren’t enjoying ourselves?”

childe oh childe~ 🫶🏻 he takes you to dates in places you can’t ever imagine. he is the perfect gentleman and knows how “dates” work. call it his unflinching charm, call it his observation skills, everything makes sense when it is with childe. mostly he would take you away, sneak you out of your home in the middle of the night, take you to the golden house’s roof, watch the stars with you in his arms and tell you, “you see that constellation? that reminds me of you,” imagine you could see the character’s constellations in the sky? how cool would that be? grr! another prompt coming! anyway… he ensures he cooks meals for you. “c’mon i just feel this is the only way i can show you my love, in the perfect blend of ingredients, in the finest tastes made by yours truly, tartaglia of the eleventh fatui harbi-”… “shut up, ajax,” tbh he specifically says his harbinger name so you can correct him and call him ajax mister sir’s heart flutters like hell <33 when that happens…

#ayato fluff #itto fluff #zhongli fluff #childe fluff #ayato x reader #zhongli x reader #childe x reader #itto x reader #ayato imagines #zhongli imagines #childe imagines #itto imagines #genshin x reader #genshin impact fluff #genshin comfort #genshin headcanons #genshin hcs

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ghouly-drool · 3 months

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did someone say wraith headcanons? i love wraith and i love headcanons. give me. spill the tea

THANK YOU

so i have a few, some gushier and more abt romance tjan others because im in love witj him and deranged but tjey arent all about that so dw

• Philip Ojomo is 100% either autistic or neurodivergent in some form to me. In The Algebra Of Infinite Night, he just reads as so.. coded. ykwim?

• He definitely was trying to move on from his traumas when the Azarov incident happened. Especially with a semi recent skin stating that he cared for strays around the garage- bro was healing before Azarov destroyed him.

• Initially i was like ya he's scared of fire (i.e. his trauma), but, as even Hooked On You tries to portray, i think his relationship with it is complicated. It's all intended to allude to his inner turmoil and battle, his enraged side that takes over him despite his best efforts and despite him knowing he shouldn't act out- he can not help it, because what else is a broken man to do? An angry, broken child, even -- seeing as that's where it all began? And he ultimately ends up the ""same"" as the people who caused his agony to begin with

• That being said, i think he tends to be calm, peaceful until provoked - which the Entity plays upon. I believe that the beginning of each trial sort of sends even the most peaceful of killers into a blind rage, through the otherworldly supernatural power that is The Entity.

• I like to believe that if it was possible to roam the fog without losing your mind, and without being in a trial he would be very big on quietly observing -maybe wouldnt turn down a conversation or two, hehe

• Definitely friends with Claudette. Definitely gets along with Jake. im just saying their besties

OK IM GONNA GET INTO SOME OF THE WILD ROMANCE ONES I HAVE as well as the tame ones

• Philip is a very all or nothing lover, very soft and cute and awkward. Hooked On You haters this aint for you its the only philip content i have and it is my bible idc

•LOWKEY ok hear me out i think a dumb lil rarepair ship i have is jiwoon and philip i KNOW ITS NOT REALISTIC but i think it is fun and funny and yeah they kiss

ok brain fried but i will write more again later hehe thank u

#video games #dead by daylight #the wraith #wraith #wraith dbd #headcanons #headcanon

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tsukkiibaby · 2 years

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haikyuu boys as camp counselors!

these are 10000% inspired by the time i was a day camp counselor for a few summers with my friend and brother. 10/10 recommend (not the working with your brother thing but like). camp counselor!au (where like they’ve played volleyball in the past but aint no one still doin it) feat: bokuto, kita, kuroo, oikawa genre: fluff

bokuto acts more like a child than some of your own campers do.

the camp directors knew exactly what they were doing when they hired him as a counselor, placing him in charge of a group of rowdy incoming sixth grade boys. you, being a counselor yourself, were responsible for one of the groups of incoming sixth grade girls, meaning you see bokuto for roughly 75% of your day. now that wasn’t a bad thing (not when bokuto looks like that), but it is pretty similar to having an extra camper around. riling you up more than your own campers do at times, bokuto knows exactly how to push your buttons. he pokes at your cheeks, sides, and bare arms, whining and pouting when you don’t give him your attention immediately (just like your campers). too bad he wants your attention all the time.

bokuto waits for you at the edge of the parking lot every morning, a large grin on his face as he offers to hold your morning coffee and phone while you rifle through the small backpack you use during the camp season. he playfully bickers with the other fifth and sixth grade counselors over drop off duty if he sees you making your way to the designated area in front of the cabins. at lunch, he always makes sure that where his group sits is no more than two tables away from the one you’re at, especially so he can get your attention when he tries to do something impressive with his food. more often than not, it ends in disaster, but hey, at least he got to see your cute smile and laugh.

in passing and on your way to activities, he’ll always try to make conversation with you, much to the chagrin of both groups of your campers. whatever specialist is leading the activity you’re headed to better hope that bokuto and his group isn’t remotely close to them, because then he’ll never stop trying to get your attention. but it doesn’t stop there. as one of the stars of the camp’s staff softball team, he’s always asking you if you’re going to the games, all but begging to see you off camp grounds so he can really flirt with you.

kita is the camp’s resident golden boy.

coming in with high praise from the owners of the camp themselves, he is the embodiment of an ideal counselor. he’s responsible and punctual, his group always on time to activities, not one camper lagging behind. not to mention his third grade boys absolutely adore him, running up to him with grins on their faces, calling his name as they get close. he’s never loud or mean with them, but he can get them to listen easily with one look of his “serious” face (spoiler alert: you’ve seen it, and it’s more cute than firm). and it seems that he’s always around when your third grade girls give you a hard time, appearing at your side to firmly ask that they listen to what you’re saying.

he always has extra water and sunscreen on hand, ready to offer to you when you need it or forget (it’s not like there’s multiple water jugs and places to find sunscreen). he’ll wave to you in passing with a smile on his face, and if he wasn’t so hellbent on making sure his campers are on time, he’d stop to chat with you. rest assured, he talks to you the most at lunch, when he’s not held captive by his group of chatty third graders. he’ll slide up to your side as you assemble your salad to ask how your day’s been, his fingers brushing up against yours as he reaches for the same serving spoon as you (an accident, he’ll claim cheekily). on the off chance that your groups are at activities relatively close to each other, he’ll get them all settled with the specialist and mumble to his co-counselor that he’ll be right back, determined to get your attention for even the smallest bit of time. his favorite part of the day, however, is right after the last activity of the day ends. while all the third and fourth graders gather their things and rush behind the cabin to talk with their friends, it’s you he’s heading towards. plopping himself down on the wooden table next to you, he slides his larger frame as close to yours as he could, craning his head down to finally have an uninterrupted conversation.

kuroo is the epitome of a try hard.

always one of the first to arrive in the morning, he sits at the table outside of the fourth graders' cabins with two iced coffees, offering you the second if he sees you without one (he claims they’re both for him, but he’d much rather see the smile spread across your face when he hands it to you). his loud voice constantly echoes throughout the camp, and you swear you can hear it even when he’s at an activity on the opposite side of the grounds. he uses it to his advantage, to be a shit stirrer. he’ll call out your name from across the fields to tease you about whatever activity you’re doing with your group. you don’t hold back either, and he loves it, watching with wide eyes as you tell him to watch his mouth or you’ll stick your fourth grade girls on him. it almost always ends with you slyly flipping him off.

he’s probably (definitely) the most competitive person between the staff and campers, always participating in whatever activity his group is at. he doesn’t even care what the activity is as long as it gets his adrenaline going. if your group is scheduled for the same activity or relatively close, he won’t hesitate to try to show off for you. kuroo will make just about anything a competition, leaning down to his fourth graders to tell them about the challenge he just thought of, offering them his cookie at lunch if they can beat him at whatever activity he proposes. they never win, unless he’s going easy on them, but you still watch him slip the camper a cookie when they’re not looking.

his competitive spirit doesn’t stop there, and he’s constantly trying to get you to agree to his stupid little competitions. he always tries to involve the other third and fourth grade counselors, but you’re the only one he really cares about playing. it’s even worse when you guys are paired together or on the same team for any counselor based activities, the tall man doing whatever he can to ensure that he’s one upping you. he always bounces up to you at the end, however, sending a grin your way and a sly remark about how someday you’ll reach his level.

oikawa is loved by everyone.

all the campers and staff absolutely adore the suave fifth grade boys counselor, and it makes your job about 10 times harder. your group of fifth grade girls ogle over him daily, running straight for their so-called “favorite” counselor the second they get off the bus or out of their parents’ car. whether he’s standing in front of the cabins for drop off duty, sitting on a table behind the cabins, or walking to the bathroom, he’ll always have a little group of campers crowding his personal space. he’ll wiggle his eyebrows teasingly at you when you fail to get your group to break away from him for the morning announcements, clapping his hands together to send your campers off to you.

he’s always trying to walk alongside you to activities, bumping his bare shoulder against yours so you’ll engage in conversation. letting your groups linger a few paces ahead of you, he’ll stay close to your side so he can talk to you about your day. staff members try to talk to you as your groups walk to their activity, but he only offers them a wave in passing - he won’t let anything interrupt his precious conversation with you. if you don’t answer right away or deny him attention for too long, he’ll act like he’s been shot, whispering loudly to your campers that you’re being mean to him. it works almost every time.

swim is where he really shines. instructional swim is fine - he gets to take his break with his friends and relax, but free swim is his favorite activity by far. he’ll slip off his shirt and into the shallow end of the large pool for the fifth and sixth graders, ignoring the stares of the other counselors and lifeguards. you saunter around the pool deck, a watchful eye on your group from behind the frames of your sunglasses, ignoring his pleas and whines for you to join him. you cave in to his request more often than not, especially on hot days, sliding yourself in as deep as your naval. he’ll always have a towel ready for you by the time the whistle blows, signifying the end of the period, a sly wink sent your way when you take it from him.

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