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bunnylovesani · 5 months

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A Birthday Affair 2

Summary: Past midnight is when the real birthday celebrations start and the best gift you could’ve asked for is to get stuffed. Full of cake, of course. You just better hope Padme doesn’t wake up.

Content warnings: P in V sex, oral sex, cheating, generally immoral activity lmao

WC: 3.2k

“Would you stop whining about it already? Give me a fucking minute to put on my shoes and I’ll get you the stupid replacement.” Anakin yells in Padme’s direction, on his way to buy you another birthday cake after the last one went up in flames.

“It’s not for me, it’s for her!” She points at you and Anakin sighs, giving you an apologetic look.

“Yeah well, she doesn’t seem to be half as fussed about it as you are.” He grabs the keys by the door and throws on a navy blue baseball cap. “Be back in twenty.” He seems to say only to you and the act of defiance doesn’t go unnoticed by Padme.

“God, what a jerk. I don’t know what’s gotten into him lately but he seems to be even more unbearable than usual.” She steps out onto the terrace of your shared apartment and you follow her. “You spend every day with us, tell me- has he said anything to you? You know, about us?”

You shuffle on your feet nervously and let out a huff. “No, nothing.” You decide to keep your lies simple and easy to follow.

“That’s even worse!” She whines. “He doesn’t mention me at all?”

“I didn’t say that.” You deflected nervously.

“So he does talk about me?” Noticing your hesitance, she puts her hand on your shoulder reassuringly. “Relax, you can tell me. You’re my best friend in the whole world, I’d never get mad at you for telling me the truth.”

“I got something that’d test that theory.” You think as you scratch the back of your head.

“Look Padme, I don’t know what to tell you- I mean he doesn’t talk badly about you, but he doesn’t mention you all that much either.”

She pauses for a moment and takes a step back, observing you closely.

“So what do you guys talk about then?” She shoots you a scrutinising glare.

“W-what?” You kick yourself for how suspicious you’re coming across.

“You heard me. We’ve been roommates for a good couple of months now.” She paces up and down the terrace. “When I’m at work and you two are alone, what do you talk about?”

“Oh, you know. The usual. Nothing special.” You reply honestly. Up until this evening, you hadn’t crossed any boundaries with Anakin- unless you count your fantasies. In which case you’d crossed them multiple times in multiple different positions.

She looks at you with narrowed eyes, processing your response for a moment before she releases a heavy sigh.

“I’m sorry, I’ve been feeling a little paranoid recently.” She slumps down onto a plump deck chair and breathes in the cold night air. “He seems distant, like he’s not really here with me, you know?” You take a seat beside her, not sure whether it would be more morally reprehensible to comfort her or to change the subject.

“I don’t know Padme, it’s between you guys- I don’t wanna get involved.” You hear the irony in your words as soon as they leave your lips.

“Of course, ‘m sorry for being such a downer- and on the eve of your birthday too! I’m gonna throw you the biggest rager tomorrow, I’ve invited so many cute guys - just for you.” She rambles excitedly and you bite your lip in guilt.

A short while later, Anakin comes home to a very lukewarm reception from Padme, who complains that the cake he bought isn’t good enough- it wasn’t the right size, the right flavour or the right colour. You thought it was perfectly fine.

After a brief but heated argument, Padme decides to call it a night and retreats into her bedroom down the hall.

“I’m sorry about her.” Anakin whispers, treading lightly over to you. “She’s acting even more insufferable than I’m used to.”

“Funny, she said the same thing about you earlier.” You smile, knees feeling weak when he returns it with his own twinkling grin.

“I can’t wait until it’s you I get to go to bed with, not her.” He speaks softly, reaching up to brush his knuckles against your cheek.

“Me neither, but we can’t do things like that anymore. Not until you deal with Padme.” You vowed, looking over his shoulder.

“I know, I know, I’ll deal with that soon-“

“Anakin! Come to bed!” Padme interjects with a high-pitched and entirely repellant screech.

He rolls his eyes so far back into his head you wonder if they’ll ever come out again.

“I’m coming!” He yells, throwing his arms into the air with a measure of agitation you’d never seen before.

“I gotta go, angel. I’ll see you in the morning yeah? My pretty birthday girl.” He grabs your chin lightly before planting a peck on your forehead and retreating into the bedroom with an indignant sigh.

You stayed up for a little while longer, deciding to tidy the mess of pillows and plushies strewn along your bed. As you readjusted your teddies, you let out a dreamy moan at the memory of your romp earlier this evening. You snake your hand between your thighs as you sit down, feeling deliciously sore- head spinning with the reminder of how right it felt to have him buried inside you. Only being granted the pleasure of having him once wasn’t anywhere near enough- you felt like you were going through withdrawal, unable to form a single thought that wasn’t about him.

Resigning yourself to a long sleepless night, you slipped your most expensive silk nightie on and crawled under the covers. Glancing over to the clock on your nightstand, you saw that it was 1 minute past midnight- officially your birthday. You wondered if Ani got you anything nice, focusing on hypothetical presents rather than allowing your guilty conscience to creep in.

Speaking of creeping in, you hear the door knob squeak with a careful twist and a festive pyjama-clad Anakin enters your room.

“Ani! What are you doing here?” You whisper, motioning to securely close the door shut.

“Sorry, I couldn’t wait- just had to come see you. Happy birthday, baby.” He hands you a charming white gift box wrapped tightly in a pink silk bow, his large palm making it look tiny.

“Can I join you for a minute?” He gestures towards your bed and you’re torn.

“Oh Ani, you shouldn’t have. I-I don’t know, what if she catches us?” You try to reason but your attention has been stolen by the pretty box, which you eagerly pluck out of his hand.

“She’s out cold.” He perches at the foot of your bed. “You hear that? Sounds like a grizzly bear operating a chainsaw.”

You giggle at his words and peel back your covers, inviting him to lay beside you.

“Or a congested walrus.” You add.

“Driving a bulldozer.”

“Well now you’re just exaggerating.” You laugh into your pillow while Anakin shushes you, playfully hitting you with your teddy.

Clutching the box as you untie the delicate ribbon, you pull out a polished gold necklace with a satiny heart pendant- engraved with the letter A.

“Ani, I love it! But-“

“I bought this a week ago.” He interrupts. “My heart belonged to you long before you gave me your body. I want you to wear it and the next time I see Padme, I’ll tell her everything.”

“Really? The next time?” You ask incredulously. You’d expected this to drag on for a lot longer.

“First thing in the morning, angel.” He reassured you soothingly and you melted into his arms.

“Okay, help me put it on.” You tittered excitedly as he clipped the necklace in place, the delicate pendant lingering over your collarbones.

“Thank you. It’s perfect.” You held it in your hand and planted a soft kiss on his lips. Pulling away slightly, you darted between his dreamy eyes and his parted mouth, trying to resist temptation.

Before you could give in first, Anakin gripped your jaw with his hands, pulling you in impossibly close to kiss you deeply. You sucked on his tongue, moaning at the subtle taste of vanilla cake frosting and minty toothpaste.

“No, wait. We shouldn’t.” You proclaim breathily, though you know your empty words were nothing but a pitiful attempt at making you feel like you’d at least tried to abstain.

“Then why does it feel so right?” He silences you by pressing his lips against yours once more, all resistance fading away under his gentle touch.

You squirm under his weight as he climbs on top of you, kissing and sucking his way down to your thighs, which he pins open until the sides of your knees are lying firmly against the bed.

“Can I taste you, sweetheart?” He asks in a hushed tone, rubbing his thumbs against your soft skin.

You nod in response, hoping that on some level not speaking would make this whole thing less sinful. Anakin doesn’t press you for a verbal response, taking no time at all before he pulls your panties off and delves his tongue into your pussy. Your hand flies over your mouth as you slip out a breathy moan, the warm feeling of his mouth enveloping your clit overwhelming you. His nails dig into your fleshy hips and his grip around your thighs strengthens- swollen veins protruding through his forearms as the adrenaline courses through his blood.

You whimper into your heart-shaped pillow, gnawing at the frills as you feel the tip of Ani’s tongue working circles into your sensitive bud.

“You taste so good, baby.” He raises his head and you take in the sight before you: lips parted, wetness dribbling down his mouth and half-lidded eyes glaring at you lustily. “I can’t wait angel, ‘m sorry.” He mumbles, getting on his knees and dragging you down by the legs. He doesn’t bother removing his plaid pyjama bottoms, simply pulling them down and letting his cock spring up over the waistband, achingly hard. You can practically see it throbbing, the tip a glistening dark pink.

“Can I? Please, baby.” He whines, rubbing his tip along your soaked folds. You nod once again but he seems unsatisfied.

“Talk.” He demands simply. “It still counts as fucking even if you didn’t say a word.”

You frown at him, not appreciating how he just burst your bubble.

“Fine.” You huff and he raises an eyebrow.

“Are you giving me attitude?” He comes closer, tip kissing your entrance. “‘cus now would be the wrong time to do that.” He hisses and slides right in, filling you up all at once and giving you no time to adjust to his size. You mewl and writhe beneath him, gripping the sheets as he puts all his body weight on you and covers his hand firmly over your mouth.

“Do you want her to hear us? Shut up and take it.” He spits venomously as he gives you deep and slow thrusts, his cock reaching all the way up to your guts. You moan helplessly as he holds you in a near headlock, silenced with his strong arms and legs pinned wide open to make way for him. Your legs tremble as your pussy greedily accepts his length, squeezing it with its plush walls.

“Slutty little pussy, ’s gripping me so tight.” He grins against your neck. You’re not sure what it was about sex that brought out such a dominant and mean side to Anakin- but you weren’t complaining. The sound of arousal filled the room, your wet slickness gushing against him as his balls slapped against your ass. Hearing the lewd sounds, he slowed down a little, cautiously guiding his cock into you in such a way that would elicit the least amount of noise.

Just as you fell into an entrancingly good rhythm, a knock was heard at the door.

“Hey, you sleeping? Anakin’s gone somewhere.” Padme’s sleepy voice reverberates through the door.

You look to Anakin for guidance with an expression of panic but he looks completely calm- doing nothing besides slowly removing his hand away from your mouth, still sheathed in you. You consider not replying and pretending you’re asleep but quickly realise the light of the lamp shining under your doorway is a dead giveaway.

“Um, I’ve just gone to sleep now.” You answered with bated breath, wondering why Anakin hadn’t pulled out yet. “Has he really? Dunno where he could’ve gone.”

As if this exchange wasn’t challenging enough, Anakin begins fucking into you again, a wild smirk plastered on his face as he thrusts in and out.

“Ugh can I come in?” She whines, no doubt wanting to rant about her failing relationship. The hunk on top of you reaches down and starts rubbing your clit, staring into you with great amusement as you unsuccessfully attempt to bat him off.

“Uh- um, no Padme I’m sleeping, ah we’ll talk tomorrow!” You tremble, hoping your words didn’t come out too shaky.

“What are you doing in there? Are you okay?” Suddenly the door swings wide open and Padme walks in on the sight of her boyfriend on top of her best friend. You only catch a glimpse of her face for a moment- a screwed up expression of horror and disgust- before she turns around and reaches for the vase on top of your chest of drawers. Anticipating her reaction, Anakin towers over you protectively as Padme hurls the glass vase in your direction- the water spraying over you both as it flies over the bed, smashing into a million tiny pieces against the wall.

“You fucking whore!” She screams. “And you! You jerk! How could you fuck my best friend?!” Anakin throws an unphased glance her way for a moment before turning his gaze towards you, brushing his hand against your face gently and locking your lips in a soft kiss. The look of adoration he gives you, ignoring Padme completely, reassures you that you are the only one worth his attention.

“Oh, I’m gonna be fucking sick.” She splutters as she walks out of the room, slamming the door shut and mumbling curses to herself.

“Ani, get off! I need to go talk to-“

“You don’t need to do anything other than be in this moment right now, with me.” He pins you down by the wrists and glares at you, pushing in until the very base of his cock is flush against you. You want to fight him, to get up and chase after your friend but the pleasure has made your legs numb.

“You can leave when I’ve made you cum.” He rasps, resuming his heavy thrusts and you can’t do anything other than cry out his name- no point being quiet now that she knows, right?

“That’s it baby, let everyone know who you belong to.” He moans, brows upturning and mouth parted. He looked so pretty like this, damp curls brushing against his forehead and plump lips formed into an inviting o shape. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head and your throat ran dry as you felt the tip of his smooth cock gliding roughly against that spot that drove you crazy.

“Fuck Ani, ‘m gonna -“ The words flew out your mouth as your release took you by surprise, seizing your whole body in ecstasy and eliciting a torrent of guttural moans from your pretty lips. He buried his face into your chest, groaning against your bare tits as he joined you in cumming, painting your walls with his seed.

Ani was nothing if not a man of his word- so he rolled off you straight after, freeing you to leave.

“I would advise against what you’re about to do.” He speaks calmly, covering his lower half in your sheets and stretching his toned arms out before placing them beneath his head.

You ignore his comment, throwing on a bathrobe and leaving the room to see Padme- furiously stuffing articles of clothing into various bags. A nauseating fear overcomes you when you realise you have nothing to say to her.

“Don’t.” She snaps, noticing your lingering presence. “Don’t even come near me. You are dead to me.” You twiddle your thumbs standing in the doorway of her room, not sure what you were expecting.

“I’m sorry Padme, I really am. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.” You mumble, barely above a whisper.

“You didn’t mean to slip and fall on his cock?” She has angry tears pouring frantically down her round face. “That doesn’t seem like the kind of thing that happens by accident.

“I meant I didn’t mean to hurt you.” You clarify gently.

“Well, you did. Oh my God, I can see his cum pouring down your leg.” She points in disgust and you cross your legs. “Is that what I saw earlier? I thought you spilt water or something, God I’m so stupid.”

“No, you’re not, this is all-“

“You’re right. This is all your fault, you dumb fucking slut. You’re nothing but a brainless whore.”

“That’s enough.” Anakin emerges, dressed in nothing but his boxers, a thin veil of glowing sweat coating his toned abdomen. “This was all my fault. If you have anything to say, you say it to me.” You cower behind him, thankful for his protective presence.

“Oh, I have plenty to say.” She barges past you both, carrying her bags out into the hallway. “A year’s relationship thrown away for a quick fuck. With that skank.”

“Don’t call her that.” He gruffly responds and you can’t help but think he’s being harsh.

“Spare me. What are you, her guard dog?” She scoffs, tears dried and replaced with a scornful bitterness. “You’re going to regret this. When the novelty wears off and you realise she means nothing to you, you’re going to come crawling back.”

“That’s highly unlikely.” He looks unperturbed, amused even - strangely nonchalant over the dramatic events unfurling before him.

“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” She jibes, throwing her coat on and getting ready to launch another venomous attack your way when she’s interrupted.

“I love her.” Anakin states simply, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

“You what?” Padme stops dead in her tracks, looking aghast.

“You what?” You parrot softly and he turns to face you, tenderly taking your face into his gentle hands.

“I love you.” He repeats, not an ounce of shame or regret in his words.

“I-I love you too, Ani.” You grab onto his wrists and gaze into his eyes with an adoring vulnerability.

“Rot in hell, you crazy motherfuckers.” Padme peels her eyes off the appalling sight before her, grabbing her bags and leaving the apartment with a thunderous slam of the bolted door.

You watch her leave with a troubled countenance painted across your face- but Ani never takes his eyes off you.

“I guess it’s just us now.” He smiles peacefully and you feel all your worries melt away.

“I guess it is.” You smile back, wrapping your arms around his strong neck and joining your lips in a passionate, cathartic kiss.

It’s not that you didn’t like Padme, nor that you were the kind of woman to choose a man over her friends. It was just him. You couldn’t help it- from this day forward you knew you would always pick Ani over anything else in this universe. Without a shadow of a doubt, he was your soulmate.

@crazy4hotmen @erinkeifer @mortalheartache @arzua10 @mugwump327

Part 1 here

#hayden christensen #star wars fanfiction #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker smut #anakin x reader #anakin fanfiction #anakin x you #star wars smut

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cattordi · 11 months

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a/n hi, sorry i’m advance about the ending it’s kinda awkward. this is part 3 to my “series”

summary it’s been over a year since the last time you and bucky, y’know ;), and he has something to tell you

pairings brothers bestfriend!mechanic! bucky barnes x post college! reader

warnings smut, pleasure kink, breeding, face fucking, choking, spanking, foul language, jealousy, fluff, angst, possessive!bucky, sir kink, rough sex, etc 18+ MINORS DNI

part 1 || part 2

lover

within a year, you learned so much about yourself—your desires— and they weren’t what the man in front of you had to offer.

“so you recently got of college?” jason ask as he whips his mouth with a napkin.

jason has been asking you out for a few weeks since you started your new job and you repeatedly let him down until a few days ago; and now you’re on a date a restaurant close to your job.

“yes, i graduated about three months ago.” you say. this whole “date” your answers to him have been short but he won’t take a hint.

“how was your graduation?” he ask and thoughts fill your mind of your graduation ceremony, everyone was there but him.

bucky.

james buchanan barnes.

just thought of him made you feel good.

“it was boring and long.” you mutter while taking a sip of your water. jason’s eyes meet your after a few unwanted seconds of silence.

he wasn’t unattractive, he just wasn’t bucky.

and that’s who you have been craving this past year.

emotionally and physically.

your brother mentioned him less and less as the year went on which confused you. but you missed him and even when you said you were done with him, you both knew you weren’t done with each other.

“y/n?” jason says and you snap back into reality. “you good? i’ve called your name like five times.”

“i’m sorry, i spaced out.”

“i can see that,” he begins and rolls his eyes in irritation which takes everything in you not to throw a chair at him.

“you were calling my name?” you question as he circled the ice in his drink around—annoyingly.

“yeah, i just want to ask if you knew who that was.” he snaps putting emphasis on the that.

turning your head slowly you see someone you didn’t plan on seeing ever again, bucky.

turning back around you start, “i don’t know who that is.”

yeah it was lying but you didn’t care.

“well he needs to stop staring.” jason groans, taking a bite of his steak.

you look down at your pasta, seeing it looking as if it hadn’t been touched.

so to get into buckys head, you indulge in your date a tad bit more.

grabbing your fork, you stab at the pasta and plop some in your mouth. you can feel his eyes on you—scanning your body.

“finally…” jason whispers to himself but you happen to hear. you cock an eyebrow at him and he laughs, “you’re eating.”

conversation sparks for thirty more minutes before your date comes to a close. “it was nice spending tonight with you.” jason says as he holds your door open to head outside.

it’s fairly warm outside so you don’t need to slide your jacket on. “it was nice hanging out with you too.” you say and smile at him.

he smiles back and silence falls over the two of you like a rain cloud in a cartoon.

“i hope we can do this again,” he begins and pulls you into an awkward hug. you fall into his embrace and wrap your arms limply around him.

after a few more seconds, you both part ways and you walk down the sidewalk feeling accomplished.

you know you managed to piss bucky off, you could feel it off him. the few times you’d catch glimpses at him, he looked like he could kill jason with his bare hands. only time would tell when he would-

“y/n are you fucking insane?” a familiar voice snaps you out your thoughts. “are you fucking insane?”

bucky was holding your arm tightly after he pulled you into a side alley. “no why?” you ask sweetly.

his hand closes around your throat so quickly you don’t even see it happen. “hm i don’t know. maybe because you’re walking home not even paying fucking attention. and then on top of that you act like you don’t fucking know me,” he begins and you can see the heat behind his eyes, “what type of man lets women walk home by themselves? i could kill him.”

with every word, he grip tightens to the point where you’re sure there’s marks on your neck.

his grip on your neck loosens, “james let it rest it’s been a year!” you groan and you can see every emotion pass his face.

“james? fucking hell y/n, you shut me out! i didn’t shut you out.” he begins, “you know i’ve wanted you since i met you and when i had you, you didn’t want me enough.”

“why weren’t you at my graduation?” you mumble and his eyes soften, “why weren’t you at my fucking graduation?” you yell and push him.

anger crosses his face again, “don’t fucking push me. i understand you’re upset but i have more of a right to be upset than you.”

you know it’s true but you can’t help but push his buttons, “why weren’t you at my fucking graduation?”

“i’m not telling you.”

“tell me.”

“no.”

“yes.”

“no.”

“yes.”

“no.”

“y-“

“because i was to fucking afraid you’d break my heart again! and you fucking did. acting like you didn’t know me. that’s fucked up y/n.”

“it was so jason wouldn’t-“

“you know me y/n so never in your fucking life act like you don’t know me.” he groans before his lips attack yours.

like it’s an instinct you kiss back hard and with need. “oh fuck i’ve missed you.” he says, “but i’m not taking you here.”

the thought of it makes you wet and you rub your legs to create friction. bucky quickly takes notice and he chuckles, “such a needy slut.”

the sounds of him degrading you make you feel even more hot and bothered as he guides you down the street. you have a hard time keeping up with his steps but you make it to his apartment building and into his apartment in no time.

before you can take in your surroundings, buckys mouth is back on yours again. he backs you into his bed, causing your to fall back. “i missed you so much.” you whimper.

“i know baby.” he groans while pulling your leggings down revealing the black lace thong you opted to wear. “was this for him?” he ask and you stay quiet.

a hard smack lands on your thigh, “was this for him?” after his question he pulls on the band of your thong and snaps it onto your skin. “no.” you wince.

“no what?”

“no sir.”

“that’s what i thought.”

though you hadn’t talked to bucky in awhile, you always remembered how dominant he was. “sit up.”

you do so but you’re quickly pulled to the floor. as soon as bucky begins undoing his belt, you know what’s about to take place. “open your mouth.”

you do so slowly, he shoves his dick in your mouth forcing you to open wider. “fuccckkk.”

he thrust into your mouth at an uncontrollable speed, hitting the back of your throat each time. “mmmhphh.” you try to say around his length but the vibrations make him even more turn on.

‘you’re too big’

“you’re taking me so well baby.” he groans while continuously thrusting into your mouth. your grip on the back of his legs tighten as he slows his thrust down. “fuck!” he moans while pulling out your throat.

spit is rolling down your chest heading south. “y/n?”

“yes sir?” you mutter while looking up into his eyes. danger and mystery fill his eyes, “i’m gonna fuck every thought with another man out your mind.” he begins while pulling your onto the bed and flipping you on your stomach, “you want to know why?”

you’re so dazed you don’t answer until a smack lands on your ass and you gasp, “why?”

“because your mine.” and with that he rips the thong off with one movement and enters you. you gasp and moan at the feelings you’ve been longing for. “holy fuck i forgot how tight you were.”

“i’ve missed y- ugh.” you begin but his finger finds your clit as his other hands arches your back a bit more making him hit your g spot a different way.

“baby you feel so good.” he groans, his hips snapping into yours with desire.

he continues thrusting and rubbing your clit until he says something neither of you expect, “tell me your regret it.”

“what?” you moan.

“tell. me. you. regret. it.” he says sternly, smacking your ass with every word.

“tell you i regret what?” you say but he stops moving at that question.

“y/n..” he begins before pulling you into his chest and gripping your throat. “tell me you regret leaving me,” the thrust start again, “tell me your regret going on a date!”

the new angle he’s hitting feels ten times better. “tell me you fucking regret it.” he grunts while pinching your colt.

“i..” you begin but your orgasm is getting closer.

“y/n i swear if you don’t fucking say it.” bucky says before rubbing your clit again.

he builds your orgasm all the way up before slowing down, “bucky i was gonna cum.” you half whine while leaning into him for friction.

“well if i don’t get what i want, you’re shit out of luck.” he says and you purposely tighten around him, “you were too cock drunk to even understand what i was saying, so now tell me y/n. did you regret it?”

“yes sir.” you say and he starts thrusting again.

“say it.”

“i regret it.” you moan as he speeds up and your orgasm builds back up quickly. you lay your head on buckys shoulder as he continues fucking you maliciously. “oh fuck bucky i’m gonna come.”

“say it again.”

“i regret it.”

“say it again. i can feel you tightening around me.”

“i regret it sir.” a few seconds of panting and loaning pass before you speak again. “bucky i’m gonna-“

“say it.”

“i regret it!”

“say it.”

“i regret it!” this time you say it when as you come. white flashes take over your vision as you moan the loudest you think you’ve ever. arching your back into him, bucky fucks through your orgasm causing more and more pleasure as another builds up.

“holy fuck y/n, your pretty cunt was made for me.” bucky moans while his thrust become static. you immediately feel even more filled as bucky comes in you. “you feel so good.”

you fall one the bed with him still in you, at the feeling of your legs turning week. “bucky?”

his jeans are already pulled up when you look up at him. “yes?”

“i’m sorry.” you mumble. he smiled in return before hovering over you. “i want us to work, but you know how my brother is and.. i don’t know. it was easier to reject you than face the truth and what i wanted.”

“it’s okay.” he starts before plopping a small kiss on your mouth. “promise me something?”

“yes?”

“don’t leave me.”

a wave or sadness goes through you as you cup his face, “never. we aren’t done, remember?”

with that he smiles and rolls over so you’re on top of him. “i’ve never been done with you y/n. it’s just you and me.”

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lincolndjarin · 6 months

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Best Kept Secret

chapter twenty six : crucifixion

ao3 link ✿ series masterlist ✩ main masterlist ✧

pairing : bodyguard!Din Djarin x afab!princess!reader

rating : 18+ mdni

word count : 12.7k

summary : judgement day.

warnings: major character death, above canon typical violence, very brief references to suicide, torture, body horror (briefly), feelings of despair, blood, wounds, general kodo grossness, vomit (reader vomits several times, it is never described in detail), language, angst, brief smut, pregnancy, death, reader is not doing well in this like she's at a breaking point, i may have missed some so feel free to let me know.

a/n: please read the warnings on this chap! it's the most serious of the bks updates, definitely a bit more intense than the rest. gonna work on getting 27 out within the next few day. i've been terrified of releasing this chapter since i started writing it so once i post this i'm going to dig a hole and sit in it and hide for a while lmao.

i changed my editing style so if there's spelling errors lmk!! apologies in advance!!

“My room is too big.”

He bursts into genuine peals of laughter and you gently smack his arm.

“Don’t laugh, it’s a serious issue! My room is enormous.” You’re giggling along with him now, it’s the hardest you’ve ever heard him laugh. You both just laugh for a few minutes, as if each other's company is the most amusing thing in the world.

Once your giggles fizzle out you wait another moment before breaking the silence.

“Where did you grow up?” You can’t see him but you can sense where he sits in the darkness, you crawl forward so you’re sitting between his legs, your own legs wrap around his waist. “I’m just curious.”

“Aq Vetina.” You can’t recall anything about the planet. You aren’t even sure you’ve heard of it.

“Do you remember your parents well? You don’t talk about them very much.” You put your hands on his shoulders, ever so slowly moving them up to his neck until you’re cupping his face.

“I’ll never forget them.” He whispers.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. We can’t change the past.” You rub your nose against his, bumping them together as you hum and nod. “My mother loved ships. We didn’t travel, we never had a reason to, but she would take me outside and we’d watch ships fly past. I could never comprehend how she knew the name for all of them, it blew my mind.” You wrap your arms around his neck, staying silent in hopes that he’ll continue, he so rarely speaks so much. “My father worked a lot but he always made time for us, he was always home in time to say goodnight to me. He was always around when I needed him, he always provided for us. On his day off he’d spend the whole day cooking, I’d sit on the kitchen counter and tell him what my mother and I had done that week. When she’d come home we’d all eat dinner together.”

“You sound like you were a happy child.” You can’t help but smile.

“I never had reason to be otherwise.” He says it so matter of factly that you don’t doubt it for a second. He was loved. It only makes you smile wider.

“What were you like, as a child?”

“Well behaved.” You immediately begin laughing once more.

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Believe it. My mother homeschooled me, she always made sure I had manners. I wasn’t particularly athletic or talkative so I didn’t play with other kids a lot. It was just me and mama.” He sounds far away, it makes you want to hold him close and never let him go.

“So what did you do all day?” Your tone has softened significantly.

“I would sew.”

“Be serious.” He’s the one who laughs now at the disbelief in your voice.

“I am! I would sit with my mother after my lessons and we’d sew.” His fingertips dance along the back of your neck as he reminisces.

“What kinds of things?” You don’t tease. When you really think about it you suppose such a hobby is fitting for him. A task that requires precision and care.

“I would help her make clothes and blankets that she would sell most days. On the weekends she’d let me do whatever I wanted so I would practice my embroidery.”

“My heart is actually about to explode out of my chest, you’re so cute.” You put on a mocking tone but the thought of such a thing really does make your heart clench. “Little Din Djarin stitching his name into his clothes.”

“You’re a cruel woman.” He leans forward, knocking his forehead against yours, almost as if he were reprimanding you.

“What sorts of things would you embroider?” Your tone goes back to genuine, you could listen to him talk about himself for days and you’d never get bored.

“Whatever my mother wanted. I would ask her what I should do and then I’d stitch it onto her blanket or the hem of her skirt. Mostly flowers, she loved daisies.” You’re pretty sure one of your ovaries literally popped at the thought of a little boy with dark curls and big brown eyes sitting beside his mother and embroidering a daisy onto her skirt. Your heart flutters a bit as you think of the necklace he got you. The silver outline of a flower you now realize is a daisy. “If he was ever gone for more than one night for work my father would bring her daisies, one for each day he was away.”

“Do you still know how?”

“I used to fix Grogu’s clothes when he ripped them but I haven’t done much else since I was a boy. He says it with finality but you carry on, not wanting him to stop talking.

“What were their names? Your parents?”

“Clara and Arin Djarin.”

“Those are pretty names.”

“What was it like for you? You said you had seven siblings right?”

“Eight actually.” You think of them now. There were eight of you and your parents' love for all of you combined wasn’t even a tenth of how much Din’s parents loved him.

“Do you like having a big family?” He lifts you off of his lap, laying you back down as he crawls on top of you, laying against your chest.

“I love it. I miss my siblings everyday, do you think we’ll be able to visit them someday?”

“If it’s safe to, of course we will.” He tilts his head, if you weren’t in darkness he’d be looking at you.

“I wish they had visited here. They would have loved you.”

“You think?”

“Are you kidding me? The younger ones would adore you.” You tangle your finger in his hair, scratching his scalp. “Kids just naturally like you.”

“They just haven’t learned to fear me.” You frown when he says it like a fact.

“I think it’s more than that.”

“Yeah?” The hopeful tilt to his voice has you leaning down to press a kiss into his hair.

“Kids are intuitive, they can sense that you’re a good person.” He tenses up as you tell him he’s a good person. You know exactly what he’s thinking about now, how he punched your husband and then refused to leave.

Neither one of you wants to talk about that though, not today.

“What kind of room would you want? Since your current room isn’t to your liking.” He’s quick to change the subject and you let him.

“In all honesty, I like the cabin, I wish we could just live there.” You run your fingers through his curls as you think about it, gently pulling through any tangles.

“My cabin?” His voice is full of uncertainty as he pulls back a bit.

“It’s nice.” You feel a bit defensive, you consider the cabin to be the closest thing you have to a home. “Can you imagine getting to stay on Naboo? We could spend our mornings walking the market.” You rest your hand on the back of his neck now. “We could get jobs in the city, and then at night we’d come home.”

“To the cabin?” He still sounds rather skeptical of your hypothetical future.

“I’d cook dinner, you’d do the chores.”

“The cabin’s a bit small for us.”

“We’d make it a bit bigger, add a few bedrooms, we don’t need that much space.”

“A few?” He turns his head, his lips brush against your collar briefly as he kisses you there, freezing up when you speak again.

“At least two, one for us and then some for any little Djarin’s who might need space.” With that he sits up entirely, his legs straddle your stomach.

“Little Djarin’s?”

“And Grogu, he would come live with us as well.”

“You’d want him to live with us?”

“Of course, he’s a little Djarin.” Your hands rest on his thighs now as he seemingly ponders above you. He hums to himself in silence for a moment and you can’t help but grin at how seriously he’s taking all of this.

“How many?” He finally speaks again and you laugh at the bluntness of his question.

“Kids?”

“How many would you want?”

“You go first.” You haven’t ever talked about this sort of thing so you want to gauge his answer first so you don’t scare him too much with all the kids talk.

“Maybe five? Or six.”

“Six?” Your voice pitches up immediately and you feel a rumble in his chest as he laughs.

“Or five.”

“How about two, counting Grogu.” Turns out you didn’t need to worry about scaring him off.

“How about three?” Three is manageable.

“Counting Grogu?”

“Counting Grogu.” He seems satisfied with that.

“I suppose we could have three, you’re the one who has to build all the extra bedrooms.”

“I don’t mind.”

“I’d work at the library and you’d work in a shipyard, we’d take turns staying home with the kids.” You pull him back to you, taking his hands and dragging him to lay his head on your chest once more.

“I’ve got enough savings, neither one of us has to work if you’d like.” It sends a twinge of pain to your heart how real this conversation has become, knowing that this exact dream isn’t possible.

You could always make parts of it real.

Someday.

“I’d want to work, to get out of the house, but you could stay home if you’d like.”

“When they’re still ik’aad, at least for the first few years I’d want to be with them.” He’s going to be a wonderful father.

“Then I’d work, not long hours, just enough to get me out of the house, when I come home I’d give you a break, you could do the shopping and I’d watch the little’s.”

“We’d go as a family, I wouldn’t want ‘a break.’”

“You’d want to wrangle three kids in the markets?” You scoff in disbelief but he continues to sound completely serious.

“They’d be well behaved.” You seriously doubt that.

“What about either one of us makes you think our children will be well behaved? Is Grogu well behaved?”

“We’ll manage.”

“They’ll be wild.” They will, not they would.

“And smart.” He sits up again, hovering above you to give you a quick kiss.

“And happy.” There isn’t a doubt in your mind that your children would be happy with Din as their father.

“You’d really want to live here? I could build us a house anywhere.”

“I like Naboo, at least everything outside of the castle. I don’t even mind the castle, I just don’t care for the people inside it.” It’s true, somewhere along the way this place grew on you immensely. You love the city and the people in it. “And they’d get to play in the garden.”

“I would build you a cabin anywhere you wanted, and I’d plant you a new garden.” He kisses along your cheeks and forehead as he speaks.

“You wouldn’t need to plant me a garden if we lived here.” You insist.

“We can’t live here, mesh’la.” He rubs a small circle with his thumb against your cheek. “This is too serious now, we’re supposed to be relaxed today.”

“When did we agree on that?” You muster up a weak laugh.

“It was a silent mutual agreement.”

“I’m plenty relaxed.” You mumble. He buries his face in the crook of your neck, his stubble tickling you as you let out an airy giggle.

“I’m actually very tense and I think we should take a break from all this talking and take care of that.” He mumbles against your shoulder.

“Oh?”

“Mhmm.” He emphasizes his point by pressing his erection against your hip, you hadn’t even realized that this is where he was going with that.

“How long have you been waiting to jump me?”

“When we started talking about the five kids I was gonna put in you.” He continues to nip at your neck and shoulders as he speaks.

“Skipping the agreed upon three and going straight to five already? You’re not even going to attempt to negotiate for four?”

“So you’re open to four?” He pulls back and you can hear his smile.

“Let’s start with one and go from there.”

“Right now?” His hips stutter down a bit against yours.

“Maker, you’re insatiable.” You both burst into another fit of laughter.

“What’s the worst thing that could happen?”

“I could get pregnant, and considering the lack of sex I’ve had with my husband I’m sure that might raise a few eyebrows.”

“It would never get to that point, when we’re in the clear with this whole Kodo mess I’m getting you out of here.”

“Like… actually leaving Naboo?”

“Exactly like that. I’m gonna take you far away from here when this is over, gonna keep you all for myself.” His hands move down, giving your hips a squeeze.

“I’m already yours.” You laughed, rolling over to be on top of him. He’s right, if you’re going to leave anyway then what’s the worst thing that could happen?

You never talked about that night after that.

When everything sorted itself out you realized how crazy your fear had made you. You couldn’t just leave. At least that’s what you’d told yourself, now you feel like an idiot for not holding him to his words. It wasn’t realistic, you both knew actually leaving would take so much more preparation than a few whispered ideas during a time where neither one of you was in any position to be making such promises.

It was just talk.

Lysa came to get you from the dining room.

After everyone left you had no motivation to move, you just stood there, frozen in time. After a few hours she found you, she had taken your hand and walked you back to your chambers. She held your hand, she kept you upright when you threatened to crumble. And when you felt a wave of nausea ripple through you she rushed you to the fresher, a hand on your back as you threw up all over again.

You sat breathlessly on the tile, Lysa rubbing your back.

“Gods, I’ve been nauseous since the wedding. Even before everything fell apart.” It’s the first words you’ve spoken since they took Din, your stomach is still churning. “This has never happened before.” You groan, you’ve had many moments of upset throughout your life, but none that made you physically ill. Lysa looks almost painfully worried.

“Ma’am… is there a chance you might be…”

Kriff.

You never talked about that night after that.

Maybe you should have.

You both did a lot of things during those days. You had been so angry, and he had done everything in his power to ease that anger, to keep both of you as happy as someone could be in your situation.

You shouldn’t have used that as an excuse to be reckless.

“I’d like to go to bed.”

“Of course.” She helps you to your feet, walking you back to your room, you turn to her one last time before you close the door.

“I’m sorry. Elaine never should have gotten involved in all this.” You’d trade places with her in a heartbeat if you could.

“It’s not your fault.” She truly seems to believe that.

Except it is. Elaine never would have found herself in this situation if she hadn’t so often been helping the two of you keep your secret.

“Goodnight, Lysa.”

“Goodnight, princess.”

You lay on the bed, unable to bring yourself to sleep in the closet.

It’s cold. Colder than Hoth, as you stare at the ceiling in your far too big bed in your far too big room. Even bigger now that it’s just you.

You let your hand roam down your torso to rest on your stomach.

Just you, hopefully.

☆

You’re now having nightly dinners with Kodo.

You don’t get any respite from him, you just want to stay in bed. You’re nauseous and tired and your head hasn’t stopped spinning since that night. A million thoughts a minute.

Where is he?

Is he okay?

What the fuck can I do about it?

Mostly that.

The worst part is your lack of a plan. If the roles were reversed Din would have already rescued you and you’d be living happily ever after.

But that isn’t how your story is going. Instead you are alone, with no scheme on how to get to him. It’s only been three days but it’s driving you insane, you have never known such hopelessness, it’s maddening. To sit alone in your room all day, staring at the ceiling until Lysa comes to dress you for dinner. Neither one of you ever speaks, afterall, what would you say to each other?

“I’m sorry the love of your life had been sentenced to die?”

How morbid.

Not that you’re above being morbid.

You think about it often. How easy it would be to drive your dinner knife into Kodo’s throat. You’re seated beside him now at dinner, both of you at the head of the table, joined by the rest of his family.

The thought of killing him is the only thing that brings you peace these days. You’ve never once in your life been violent until now. Din is good. He’s a good man. In every way he is the opposite of your husband yet Din is the one locked away, Maker knows where, while Kodo is being rewarded.

It doesn’t make you mad, it makes you furious.

It makes you want to poison his wine.

But you don’t have poison.

And you can’t put yourself in danger. Because you feel fundamentally different, and even if you refuse to think that such a thing is possible you know you wouldn’t just be putting yourself in danger. There’s more at stake now.

That’s what you tell yourself to stay calm, a feat that is getting harder by the minute as you’re sat beside Kodo who is currently bragging about how he defeated a Mandalorian.

“They aren’t as strong as you think they are. Under the armor they’re weak, pathetic.”

It took six battle droids to keep him down. You didn’t even get near him.

“Some people just need to be taught a lesson, don’t touch what isn’t yours.” He sneers and the rest of the table erupts into laughter. “I certainly taught that horned bitch a lesson as well, you all should have seen what they brought me last night.”

You perk up, this is the only thing they’ve said in days that truly matters to you. You’ve heard nothing about the current state of either of them until now.

“What did they do to Elaine?” Everyone’s head turns to you, all their expressions look as if you’ve announced something treasonous but Kodo smiles as if he were explaining something to a child.

“She was properly punished, the way someone who observed such a crime with no intervention should be.” He puts his hand over yours when he says it.

You don’t ask for any follow up.

You don’t think you could stomach it, so you stay silent for the rest of your meal. When you’re finished you stand, the rest of the table is starting to pour more drinks but you simply lean down, mumbling something about being tired before giving Kodo a quick kiss on the cheek and dismissing yourself.

You’re waiting for the night where he joins you in your chambers, after all his father is dead, but it has yet to happen. He had told you that once he was king he would be in need of heirs but he seems happy enough with his pleasure houses and you’re more than grateful for the women you entertain him so you don’t have to.

So you return to your chambers alone, peeling off your gown before burying yourself under the covers.

Sleep evades you as you toss and turn. You aren’t even tired, there’s too much going on in your mind, there’s no room for exhaustion. After about an hour you manage to drift in and out of unconsciousness, earning a brief reprieve from your anxieties until a sharp knocking has you jolting upright.

You don your robe, rubbing sleep from your eyes as you rush to the door, you’re too tired to wonder who might even be bothering you at such an hour as you pull the door open.

Lysa?

“We have to hurry, ma’am.” She grabs your arm, frantically tugging you into the hall.

“Lysa? What are you doing? Are you okay?”

“I am fine, but we don’t have much time.”

“Surely you have enough to tell me where we are going.”

“Do you want to see him or not?”

Din.

You nod, taking her hand as he rushes onward, stopping at each hall to peer around the corners until you make your way to a servants stairwell, skipping several steps in your descent until you run out of stairs. You’ve never been down here, you didn’t even know there were dungeons until recently.

It makes your stomach twist in knots the moment you stare into the darkness.

“Are there no guards?” You whisper, squeezing her hand.

“Not for the next hour, I’ve made sure of it.” She begins walking down the poorly lit corridor, pulling you along behind her.

The stone floor is damp and it smells of mildew. Your bare feet are already freezing after just a few steps.

Every cell you pass is lit from the outside with a hanging lantern, they’re mostly empty, but you catch glimpses of movement out of the corner of your eye every now and then. In all honesty you’re doing your best to take in as little as possible, you don’t want to think about Din being down here in such a place, but there’s one element you can’t ignore.

The wailing.

Someone is weeping, a low, sorrowful song filling the vast maze of halls and you realize quickly you’re heading in its direction, Lysa tenses beside you as you continue on. You’re about to turn one more corner when she abruptly stops, turning to face you.

“He needs to eat.” She removes a fistful of rations from her apron pocket, shoving them into your hands.

“He hasn’t?” He’s been down here for three days.

“He won’t… let me.” You pause, cocking your head to the side and she gives you an apologetic look when she turns. “He won’t let me uncover his face.”

Oh.

“I’ll feed him.” You nod slowly, tucking them into your own pockets before turning the corner. The contents of the cell immediately on your right have you stumbling backwards but Lysa is not swayed, pulling a key from her pocket, unlocking the door quickly before handing it to you.

“He’s two cells down, on your right.” She doesn’t look at you as she rushes in, pulling a roll of bandages from her dress. “Shh… it’s okay, I’m here.” Her voice goes soft as she kneels beside Elaine. You can’t help it as you step into the entryway of the cell.

Well, you’ve found the source of the wailing.

She’s sat on a cot, curled in on herself as Lysa carefully peels back a series of soiled bandages from her face.

“I’ve got you, it’s just me.” She continues to make an attempt to sooth a rather hysterical Elaine as she peels back the final layer of bandages and your stomach flips. “You’re okay, love, I need to change these.” You don’t know how Lysa is so calm, even in the darkness you can see the extent of her wounds. Now you know what they brought Kodo last night.

Both eyes.

“She was properly punished, the way someone who observed such a crime with no intervention should be.”

Oh gods.

You’re worried you may collapse as you watch Lysa tend to her with no hesitation, cleaning them with a careful hand before she begins to redress them. You can’t bear to watch any longer as Elaine begins sobbing once more. You try desperately to force the sight of your mutilated friend from your mind as you count down two more cells before quickly fumbling for the lock, letting it hit the floor as you take the lantern outside the door off its hook, bringing it into the dark room.

It isn’t like Elaine’s cell.

There’s no bed or interior light, it’s terribly dark and fetid, his cell running deeper than her’s. It takes a few steps for you to finally illuminate the room enough to see him.

Maker.

What have they done to your Din?

You don’t hear Elaine anymore, there isn't a single thing that could distract you from the scene in front of you. There is nothing but the sight of your kar’ta. There’s too much for you to worry about, you don’t even know where to start, you’re frozen in place, a small part of your brain refuses to recognize the man before you as Din at all. He shouldn’t look like this.

Armorless.

They’ve stripped him of any clothing you recognize, the thought alone makes you nearly lose your dinner.

They took his helmet, replacing it with a linen sack.

Did they see his face?

You briefly have to shut your eyes, taking a deep breath as you take in the rest of him. His clothes are too thin, he must be freezing, they’ve dressed him in a cotton tunic and trousers that end just below the knee. You can see just how beaten and bruised he is. Unlike Elaine he’s in chains, kneeling on the floor with his hands shackled, taut above his head. You swallow the lump in your throat and finally crouch down in front of him, setting the lantern down beside you as you reach out to place a hand on his chest.

“Din…” Your voice cracks and the moment you come in contact with him he flinches back. Suddenly you know how Lysa held it together so well with Elaine, she just had to. You can’t fall apart, who would care for him now if you did? “It’s me, just me. Just me.” You whisper and place a hand over his heart but withdraw it quickly when he trembles under your touch. You ache at the sight of it but more than anything you’re confused, it only takes a moment for you to realize the issue.

He doesn’t have his helmet. They’ve not only left him here blind, but deaf, of course any touch would frighten him.

He assumes you're here to harm him.

You lean in, careful not to come in contact with him as you speak clearly and loudly.

“Din?” His trembling stops instantly. You find it a bit troublesome how much worse his hearing seems to have gotten in such a short time, you’re half tempted to reach under the bag to make sure he still has his ears.

“Sarad?” Oh, Din. His voice is terribly small and it sends you forward, wrapping your arms around him as you pull him into an unreciprocated embrace.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” You make sure to speak loud enough for him before pulling back, placing your hands against the fabric covering his face.

“Are you okay?” He coughs a bit as he asks and you almost laugh at how ridiculous the question is considering the state he’s in. Are you okay?

Technically no.

But far better than he’s doing.

“I’m perfectly fine, what can I do for you? Are you hurting?” You feel his face through the bag as you look down across his body. It doesn’t look like there’s been any permanent damage outside of a pretty nasty cut on one of his legs.

“Don’t worry about me.”

“Now’s not the time to play the hero, Din.” He flinches a little and you calm your tone immediately. What the hell did they do to him? “Just let me help.”

“How’d you get down here?”

“Lysa, she says you aren’t eating.”

“She’d have to lift my- the bag to do it.” He sounds apologetic, as if you could ever fault him for following his creed.

“It’s okay… may I?” You bring your hands to the hem of the bag but his head turns sharply.

“I- I don’t want you to look.”

You have no response. He’s always wanted you to look.

“I just, I don’t think you wanna see the condition I’m in. I don’t want your only memories of my face to be this.” He whispers when you don’t respond.

You should have looked when he asked you to. You should have done a lot of things differently.

You shouldn’t have waited so long to look.

You shouldn't have waited so long to tell him you loved him.

You should have just let yourself love him. Why did you fight it for so long? It seems silly now. If you could do it all again you would have just taken his helmet off the first night you met him and you would have married him right then and there. You would have left Naboo that night.

And you would never keep any of it from him. You would tell him how important he is and how loved he is, you wouldn’t make him wait.

Even now you can’t help it though, censoring yourself out of fear. Do you tell him about how nauseous you get every morning? About the way Lysa stares at your belly when she does your makeup?

No.

It wouldn’t do either of you any good, not when he’s in this situation.

You take hold of the edges of the bag once more, gentler this time.

“I’ll close my eyes.” You lift the fabric completely off of him, setting it in your lap as you simultaneously shut your eyes. You keep one hand on his face, using your thumb to find the corner of his mouth as your other hand fumbles to open a ration bar. You feel him part his lips as you feed him. He’s barely chewing, eating quickly and swallowing most of it whole. “Have they fed you at all?” You whisper as he finishes the first bar in a matter of seconds, his teeth lightly scraping against your fingers before you withdraw them, tearing open another bar.

“No.” His voice is still soft as you go to feed him once more, opening each package until he’s eaten them all.

“Are you still hungry? I could see if Lysa has more.”

“I’m okay.” You let your head fall forward, resting your forehead on his.

“What else can I do for you?”

“Nothing. Being here is enough.”

If you had felt helpless before it was nothing compared to this. This is more than helplessness, it’s despair.

“I’m sorry.” You pull yourself further into his lap, wrapping your arms around him in the process.

“Hey… none of this is your fault.” It certainly feels like it is. Why does he keep comforting you when he’s the one shivering and alone down here?

“Please, there has to be something I can do to help you.”

“There is one thing.” You almost open your eyes, you're so relieved, you just want to ease his pain.

“Anything. I’ll do anything.”

“I need you to promise me you won’t look.”

“Won’t look?” Your eyes are already closed, you couldn’t look any less if you tried.

“When they do it. I don’t want you to see it- it won’t be pretty.”

When they separate his head from his body.

“I won’t.” You can’t deny him this, you’ll give him anything he wants. “Do you know how much I love you?” You whisper before leaning forward another inch to kiss him.

The question is genuine. It terrifies you to your core to think that he may not know just how much you love him.

“Of course sarad.” He murmurs against your lips until you let your head rest on his shoulder, fighting back tears.

What do you say now?

What do you say to a man condemned to death?

“I love you.” You mumble into the thin fabric of his tunic.

“I love you too.” After a moment more with him you hear metal jingling as Lysa locks Elaine's cell once more. You quickly pull back from him, pulling the bag back over his head, once you know he can’t see you anymore the tears flow freely. Lysa steps into the cell and you remove your robe, wrapping it around him, immediately he begins to protest.

“Mesh’la, you can’t leave this here.” His voice is strained and it makes you sick to think he started crying once he was out of sight as well.

“Please, y-you’re gonna freeze.”

“They’ll know you were here, sarad’ika.”

“Din…” You’re practically babbling as Lysa removes your robe from his shoulders, an apologetic look on her face as she grabs your arm.

“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but we need to go.” Tears sting your eyes as Lysa urges you to hurry but you don’t want to leave him, you want to stay, no matter the consequence. You pull away from her, wrapping your arms around his torso.

“You need to go.” His voice is urgent through the fabric as you cling to him tighter.

Would it be easier to just stay? Get caught and join him at the executioners? You’re genuinely considering it when you feel your stomach churn once more and you’re reminded of the exact reason why you can’t stay. Before you lose your nerve and shatter completely you lift the bag, just enough to give you an eyeful of his split lip and bruised jaw as you gently lean in and kiss him one more time.

Doing everything in your power to remember exactly what it feels like.

The curve of his lips and the shape of his chin, the overgrown stubble brushing against your skin as you press your face harder against his, desperation taking over as you taste salt on his lips. You hold him as long as you can, until you hear Lysa urging you to make haste once more.

“I love you.” You press your forehead to his through the fabric, feeling the familiar shape of his face against yours.

“I’ll always be yours.”

That was the last thing he was able to say before you let Lysa drag you out of the dungeons.

☆

It’s like everythings suddenly back to the beginning.

You wake up alone, you go to bed alone, and you wander the castle alone.

There is no plotting or scheming to free Din.

Even if you were a trained killer or bounty hunter, it would be more than difficult to get him out of the dungeon and on a ship off Naboo. It would be even harder to do so when you’re one of the most recognizable people on the planet.

He is buried deep beneath the ground and there is nothing you can do about it.

After all, you're just a doll.

You don’t know when it happened but all your clothes are blue again. Every dress Lysa fetches from the closet is a different shade of blue and all your nightgowns are the color of the sky. A personal brand put on you by Kodo. It’s clearly more than just a preference now, it’s a reminder to you and everyone else that you’re his.

And time blends.

You know a date was set right around the time you visited him. One week until Kodo’s coronation and two until the execution. His first public event after being crowned king will be a death sentence, how fitting.

So you wake.

And you sleep.

And you walk.

Kodo never replaces Din and you haven’t seen Leo since that night, so you’re completely alone. It’s like he’s rubbing in the fact that you’re powerless. There’s no need for you to have a guard, you can’t leave. If you tried you’d be escorted back in an instant.

You tried to convince Lysa to let you see him again last night.

“Please, just a few minutes-“

“I’m sorry ma’am, it’s just not possible. The only reason I was able to get you down there the first time was because the guard that usually lets me in was working nights, he won’t be working nights again until next month.”

Din won’t live to see next month.

“Is he eating?”

“He won’t let me-“

“You need to insist. Tell him I insist, and tell him you’ll close your eyes.”

She pins back a bit of your hair, leaving half up and half down. You both bask in the silence for a moment.

“I’ll make sure he eats.”

“Thank you.”

That had been the last conversation you had with Lysa.

She doesn’t come to dress you in the morning. You think nothing of it and dress yourself in the gown she’d laid out last night. It’s a bit difficult, putting your coronation gown on on your own but eventually you manage, when you’re fully dressed in the obscenely decadent blue fabric you begin to worry.

You have no reason to assume that everything is fine. It would actually make sense for this to be a worst case scenario situation, everything else in your life is right now.

You’re about to leave in search of her but you decide against it. Sitting at the vanity and doing your makeup as quickly as possible, the last thing you need to do right now is give Kodo a reason to be upset with you, you have to be presentable. You smear the shimmering blue eyeshadow across your lids before rushing out of your room.

The halls are full. Servants move quickly from room to room, cleaning every inch as you carefully push through the crowds, making a beeline towards the dining room.

Kodo is seething when you push open the large doors.

He stands at the end of the table, shoving an armored guard as the veins in his neck jut out in his rage.

“Where could she have possibly gone? She’s blind. You’re telling me some blind bitch outsmarted my entire guard?”

Your heart flutters at the thought.

They escaped.

Your hope is shattered the moment Kodo begins speaking again.

“At least we still have the Mandalorian… I want security tripled, guards stationed outside his cell at all times.” He continues grumbling for a moment until he realizes you’re there. “Happy coronation day dear wife! I’m afraid we’ve had a rough morning here, somehow in the night the Togruta girl escaped, do not fret, we’ll find her.”

God's you hope not.

Even if things are worse than ever regarding Din there is one flicker of light in that darkness. Lysa got Elaine out. Knowing that almost puts you at ease.

“Happy coronation day.” You actually manage a smile when you look at your husband, it’s weak but it’s genuine. You want to be mad that they didn’t help Din escape but you just can’t be. You know they most likely tried but if the roles had been reversed and you could only get one of them out you wouldn’t hesitate.

So there is no animosity. Just a flicker of happiness for them.

They got out.

☆

You were under the impression that a coronation was a happy event. Yet when you step out onto the castle steps it seems to be quite the opposite.

They look miserable.

All of their faces are sullen and dejected. How shocking, no one is excited about Kodo being crowned king. He didn’t have any of the outside of the castle decorated or made presentable in any way. No one reacts when Kodo reads from an ancient looking book until a crown is placed on his head.

A moment afterwards you’re instructed to kneel and a tiara is placed onto your head.

The audience is silent and you feel shame when you stare out at them.

Even if you don’t have very much power you still feel as if you’ve failed them. The feeling follows you when you’re directed to the dining hall with Kodo.

“I have a couple gifts for you, wife.” His twisted smile makes your stomach turn as you enter the dining hall, now decorated with blue and gray banners.

“A gift? You shouldn’t have, my king, I- I didn’t get you anything.” You feign remorse as you take a sip of the wine in front of you on instinct before spitting it back up into the cup.

“That’s more than okay, you’re my gift, sweet wife, all mine.” The thought of such a thing makes you sick, you smile despite yourself.

“That’s very kind.” You’ll only ever be Din’s. No amount of blue fabric and faux smiles can change that. He snaps his fingers and a large box is brought to you by a servant, they set it directly in front of you on the table. You look at Kodo who nods, sitting back in his chair as you stand, the box is wrapped in checkered blue paper, a large bow adorning the top. Your hands tremble a bit as you take hold of the edges of the ribbon, tugging on them until the bow slips free, much to your surprise the entire box falls open, the sides collapsing giving you an immediate view of the contents.

The silver, shimmering contents.

Din’s helmet.

Polished like new, it sits before you, and the room suddenly empties. It’s as if you are completely alone, despite all the eyes that are most definitely pinned on you right now. Your hands continue to shake as your fingers wrap around the beskar steel, like you would when you held Din’s face, lifting it to glare into the visor.

Empty.

You can’t help but stare at your own emptiness reflected back at you.

You want to hold it close, press it to your forehead but you’re snapped back to reality by the grating sound of Kodo’s voice breaking you from your focus on the helm between your hands.

“That’s only one of your presents, open the next one.” He hisses gleefully.

You set the helmet down, realizing there was another, much smaller box underneath it. Silently you scoop it up and cradle it in your hands. It’s a larger than a ring box, it just barely fits in your palm as you ever so gently open it, swinging the top open as if it were a tiny treasure chest.

Huh.

It takes a moment.

You aren’t exactly sure what it is you’re looking at at first but when it registers your entire body tenses up, your grip tightening on the gift box.

Bloody and pink, a tongue.

Of course you know better than to assume Kodo would give you any old tongue. This is a special someone’s tongue.

No, no, no, no, no.

You had loved his tongue before anything else.

He can’t do this, he cannot do this to you.

You had fallen for his sharp wit first, it was what drew you into him. His sweet words had won you back, his declaration of devotion.

Now you hold all of that in the palm of your hand.

“What do we say?” His nasally voice breaks through your mental anguish.

No.

“Come on, where are your manners?”

Please.

“Thank you.” Your whisper is nearly silent as you struggle to keep down the scream bubbling in your throat.

“What was that?”

You clear your throat.

“Thank you.”

He makes you take it with you. You don’t bother telling him you won’t be attending the coronation ball in a few minutes, it’s not like you’ll be missed.

In one arm you’re cradling his helmet, in the other the little blue box.

You set each one down carefully onto the bed, even if it’s a bit demented these are the only parts of him you have left. You stare at the little box.

You have never been hateful.

Kodo made you into this. You are full of hate, for most things at this point. You hate your husband, you hate your room, and most of all you hate the little blue box on the bed.

And the music starts.

It must be deafening in the hall for you to hear it from your room but it’s there, loud and demanding of your attention.

You’re moving before you even have a chance to think about it, in a few quick strides you’re standing beside the vanity, your hands gripping the top of the mirror as you pull it down in one swift motion, the contents spill everywhere and the glass shatters in an instant, shards splattering the floor but you take no time to process it.

You move on to the next thing.

You yank each drawer from the dresser, throwing them to the floor, clothes strewn about until it’s light enough for you to push the entire dresser over. In your frenzy you go about the room toppling every stupid fucking table over. So many fucking end tables in one room, and you throw everyone to the floor, trinkets and vases clattering to the ground as you destroy the room. You get a rush of adrenaline as you lift one of your nightstands and throw it against the wall leaving a small dent but more importantly the force of it makes anything hanging on the wall tumble to the floor, glass frames shatter.

Your chest heaves as you stare at the carnage.

And it isn’t enough.

Your face is wet with tears and your hands with blood from cuts you didn’t feel upon your skin as you tear open the closet door, the pile of blankets mock you from the floor, you grab them, your vision now blurry with tears as you pull them out of the closet, throwing them onto your bedroom floor. When you return to the closet you’re in a frenzy, you tear at the fabric before you, yanking each and every dress off their hangers, ripping what you can.

There is nothing else for you to do, so you destroy everything you can get your hands on until the only thing left untouched is your bed, left in pristine condition as you let out a small sob.

Maybe you are a hateful person now.

You feel as though you have every right to be at this point.

You step over the shard of glass, giving your bloody hands a glance before wiping them on your gown.

Happy coronation day.

You sit on the bed, your trembling fingers wrap around the helmet, now that you’re alone you waste no time to hold it against you face, until your body just gives up, too tired to stay awake anymore.

☆

A guard wakes you in the morning, knocking on your door, when you answer it they tell you Kodo requires your presence in his chambers.

You dress in a blue gown that you don’t look too closely at. Stopping at the fresher on the way, rinsing the dried gore from your palms, wincing as you clean your wounds. None of which seem too deep.

You want to cut Kodo’s tongue out, to make him feel it. But you know that sort of thing would be an impossible task. So you daydream about it as you walk. You’re more than displeased when you open the door and are greeted by Leodall. You hadn’t seen him since that night and from the looks of it he wasn’t expecting you. He swallows loudly when you step inside Kodo’s room.

Normally you’d be curious, you’d probably take a look around but your eyes refuse to focus on anything but Leo as you scowl at him.

“Why’d you do it?” You don’t hesitate to ask, you have no idea how quickly Kodo will be joining you.

He simply stares at you, shame apparent on his face.

“You owe me an explanation at the very least.” You cross your arms in front of your chest as he clears his throat.

“I thought he’d reward me.”

You laugh. A harsh dry sound

“What could he have possibly given you that you couldn’t have just asked me for?” Your gaze never softens and you’re practically seeing red as you stare at him.

“I thought he’d give me a lordship.”

You can’t help it as another crisp and pained laugh slips past your lips.

“You thought Kodo would raise your status? I thought you were supposed to be smart.” Is he an idiot? “He doesn’t see servants as people, if you wanted such a thing you could have asked me, maybe I could have done something.”

A glimmer of something similar to hope flashes through his eyes.

“Would you- would you consider doing so now?”

“You cannot be serious-” Your expression goes from fury to disbelief as you stand.

“It seemed worth asking.” He puts his hands up defensively as you storm up to him, poking a finger into his face.

“You slimy little weasel, it should be you on the chopping block, not him. If it were up to me I’d have them put your head on a spike.” The words pour out of you like venom.

“I would be nicer to me if I were you.” He sneers and your incredulity only grows. You can’t help it, you scoff in his face.

“I would rather die.” A part of you really means it.

“You might if you aren’t careful, I saved your life by letting Elaine and your Mandalorian take the fall, I could have told the king that you were a willing participant. I saw the two of you together, I read your little rules. He never forced himself on you. I wonder what Kodo might think about that.” You aren’t a fighter, you’ve never so much as thrown a punch in your life but you grab him by the collar of his shirt and slam him into the wall, the back of his head hits the stone and you don’t feel an ounce of remorse as you do so.

“Do it.” You tilt your head to the side, almost as if you’re taunting him. “Tell him.” Any of the confidence he briefly had is gone in an instant. “The moment you do I’ll tell him that you’re covering your tracks, and that you made a pass at me. I wonder how Kodo would reward you for trying to touch what’s his?” Leo’s head turns as you both hear Kodo’s piercing voice in the hall. You release your grip on his shirt, brushing off your gown as you turn towards the door. Kodo and three others make their way into the room as Leo coughs behind you.

“Dear wife, I have another gift for you.” He takes a step to the side, gesturing at a line of three people you don’t give so much as a glance. He doesn’t even seem to notice the obvious tension in the room. “A new staff!”

“I don’t need a new staff, I’m fine on my own.” You abandon the pleasantries. You’re in such a state of upset right now, what's the point?

“You’re the queen now, staff is required. These three will replace the ones you've lost in a week, until then Leodall will be training them intensively to tend to your every need. Two guards will also be assigned to you but I promise they will be much less loathsome than your Mandalorian.”

All five of them will be trained to keep an eye on you. To report back to Kodo, after everything with Din you should have known he’d keep you on a shorter leash.

You barely look at them.

You hate them.

You shouldn’t, they’ve done nothing wrong, but you hate them.

You give each one a quick up and down, naming them in your mind.

A BD-3000 droid commands the most authority just based on how she stands so you mentally note her as Elaine's replacement. You’ll call her new Elaine.

New Lysa is a pasty young blonde woman with rosy cheeks. You truly wonder how well informed she has been on your circumstance. She’s smiling from ear to ear and seemingly couldn’t be happier to be here.

And new Leo is somehow even more nervous looking than actual Leo, practically shaking like a leaf at the sight of you. The bags under his eyes are worse than your own. A lanky thing with messy brown hair.

There’s no reason for you to fight this, Kodo always gets his way so why bother. So you nod. You don’t pretend to be grateful this time, instead you shove your way past all of them, content to return to your room and never leave.

☆

The morning of the execution comes before you’re ready for it.

Of course you didn’t sleep last night, how could you?

You dress yourself, apparently your new staff isn’t starting until tomorrow, not that you mind another day to yourself. You manage to find something that isn’t blue, a gray dress trimmed with gold, the closest thing you’ll find to funeral attire. No one else will dress with any respect for him but they can’t stop you. Your vanity is destroyed so you don’t bother with your hair or your makeup, you simply don’t care enough.

For the most part you feel nothing when you open the door, only emptiness until you look down.

Someone left you a small vase of flowers.

You pick them up, taking a closer look but your heart skips a beat when you do so.

Daisies.

After a few short breaths you throw the vase into the wall across from your door, tiny shards of porcelain fly everywhere as two servants at the end of the hall give you a look of horror. Your shoes crunch over the remains of it as you make your way down the hall and to the entryway of the castle.

Kodo insists that the two of you get to see him first.

You’re sweating wildly out on the steps as you wait.

Long before you’re ready for it they bring him out.

A shivering skeleton of a man with a linen bag over his head, immediately bile rises in your throat. Kodo is grinning ear to ear when his legs are kicked out from under him and he’s forced to kneel.

Kodo himself reaches forward and tears the bag off, too excited for any decorum or finesse.

You gasp as you stare down at the broken man before you.

In all honesty he isn’t at all what you envisioned.

His eyes verge on being hazel; they're such a light brown. You’d always pictured them to be nearly black. It doesn’t matter what color they are though, when you see the tears forming in his lash line you flinch, clutching the ring on your necklace to silently let him know silently just how much he means to you.

He’s a mess.

You don’t like looking at what those weeks in the dungeons did to him and the last thing you need to do right now is empty your stomach on the palace steps.

He’s too thin. Far, far, too thin, it’s like his entire being has shrunk down. He’s hollow.

Your breath hitches when Kodo grabs a fistful of his dark hair, forcing him to turn and stare at the crowd. They must have cut it while he was down there it’s a mess, jagged edges and shorter than you’re used to.

“This man has committed an act of treason against the crown.” His voice is loud and booming as the city goes quiet. “For such a crime he shall face the proper punishment.” He yanks him downawards, you watch in horror as Din’s head hits the stone, an incoherent mess of sounds pour from his bloody mouth and you have to look away.

He didn’t want you to look.

You remind yourself to try and calm your breathing. You can hear the scuffle as they drag him to the guillotine, placing his neck into the wooden divot, your heart threatening to beat out of your chest as you turn to look. His eyes are everywhere but on you as he looks at the people around him, desperately pleading for his life. Not a single person so much as glances at him, afterall, it’s just nonsense, no one can understand him without a tongue.

You can’t stand it, you almost cover your ears but you manage to resist as Kodo puts an arm around your waist, pulling you close to him.

“You’re welcome, sweet wife.” He whispers, his breath hot and wet against your ear.

Fuck it.

You don’t suppress the shudder in your spine as you shoot him a look of disgust. In a matter of moments everything you care about will be gone, why pretend any longer.

A bellowing chime plays from a nearby clock tower and you know it’s time, you straighten up as you stare at the guillotine in abject horror.

This is it.

Your chest rises and falls in sharp short bursts as everyone prepares themselves, a hush forming among the crowd on the street.

And it begins, a chain reaction that you cannot stop now that the executioner has his ax raised above his head.

You had expected more. More time.

A part of you thought that time would slow, that you’d have a chance to stop it.

But no.

There is no epic fairy tale moment where the sun glimmers off of the blade and the executioner raises his ax, giving you this perfect moment to run to him, to shield him from the inevitable, to beg them to take you with him.

That moment never comes.

You barely have enough time to close your eyes like you promised him. In one unbroken motion the rope is cut, the blade falls and boom.

Just like that, he’s gone.

When you hear the metal slicing through the air you squeeze your eyes shut, hearing only the wet crunch as it cuts through flesh and bone. A soft, squishy thud when his head hits the stone.

In fashion with your decision to no longer hide your disgust from Kodo you vomit. Bending down you puke onto the stones, spraying your own, and Kodo’s feet. The triumphant smile on his face vanishes as he realizes what’s happened. You wipe your mouth on the back of your hand, refusing to look at Din’s limp body as you give Kodo one last look of detestation before turning around and running back into the castle, not caring what anyone thinks anymore.

The moment you’re inside the reality of it all settles in as you feel tears falling wildly as you run up the steps to your room.

☆

You have been good, and kind, and in return the maker rewarded you by killing the love of your life.

So when you stand in the center of your demolished room you do the only thing your body can do at this point.

You scream.

From deep within your stomach, you scream, loud and raw.

If anything was left unbroken in your room you’d be throwing it at the wall. But there’s nothing so you scream.

You shriek.

You howl.

And you wail.

You scream until there is no more noise. Your voice, like the rest of you, gives up.

You aren’t sure how late it is when you finally stop. You’re tired and it’s dark outside and your throat is raw.

And you lay on the floor. Because the bed is too big, and too cold, and the closet is so empty. So the only place left to sleep is there. You lay on the floor with no more tears to cry and no more sounds to scream as you stare at your bed, only from this angle can you see a rectangular shape under your bed frame.

You wipe your nose with a stray piece of fabric before slowly crawling over to it, you sit on the floor and when you retrieve the item a brand new lump forms in your throat as you stare down at the box Din had bought all those days ago at the market.

Your failsafe.

With quivering hands you open it, staring into the small space containing a mess of items but what catches your eye is a piece of folded paper with your name on it. You take it between your fingers, opening it, careful to not let your tears fall onto it.

Sarad’ika,

If you’re reading this then I’m afraid things aren’t going all that well for me. There are plenty of possible reasons as to why I’m no longer with you, but what’s important is that I plan on doing everything in my power to get back to you. There is only one thing in the galaxy that could keep me from your side, and if that is my fate then this box will ensure you’re taken care of.

The most important thing is for you to get off this planet. I have included a few possible plans for you, do what you have to to survive. Elaine will help you escape.

You can seek out Greef Karga on Nevarro. Tell him Din Djarin sent you, tell him what’s happened and he will see to it that you are cared for. Explain our circumstances and I am certain he will provide you with safe lodging.

Tatooine is also an option. You’ll find a Mandalorian there by the name of Boba Fett, he will not turn you away. You will be protected there, if you need to relocate for some reason after that he will help you locate the Mandalorian convert. Show the Mandalorians your ring and you will be cared for the rest of your life, the convert will protect you.

As an absolute last resort there is a planet located in the Outer Ring called Ossus. There is a school there, taught by a man named Luke Skywalker. I doubt he would be eager to take you in but you must insist. Bring the chainmail, they’ll know who sent you. Take care of each other.

In this box you will find enough credits to get you off planet and take care of you for several months, a year if you’re frugal, I suggest you take a few jewelry pieces to pawn off for extra credits as well. You will find a small chainmail shirt, and a necklace of mine.

And lastly you will find your vibroblade.

Protect yourself. You’re strong, and more than capable of doing so.

I have one request for you, please, I will only ask this one thing of you.

Be smart.

You are the smartest and kindest person I have ever had the honor of knowing. Be smart, take care of yourself. If the roles were reversed I know that I would go to extremes to either get you back, or find justice for you. And all I can do is ask that you do not attempt any such thing, the only thing I would ever want for you is safety and happiness.

So seek those things out.

Be safe. Be happy.

I was lucky to know you, and even luckier to be yours.

an ner kar'taylir darasuum,

Din

All my love.

You flip the paper over, desperate for more, more Din, but all you find is scrawled coordinates to each location. Your fingers sift through the items, everything he promised is found inside but you latch onto the blade. Laying back down on the floor you clutch it between your fingers as you think of Din.

Din, who was yours.

Din, who they took from you.

Who Kodo, took from you.

And your grip on the knife tightens.

☆

Two guards stand outside your door round the clock now.

They never follow you or come into your room but they’re there, silently watching as you direct all your anger at your new staff. As promised Leo trained them to be as persistent and infuriating as he was.

When the two new girls come to fetch you in the morning you can’t help it when you scream at them to leave you alone and to stop trying to clean the ever growing mess of things.

It doesn’t matter that it isn’t their fault, you can’t stand the sight of anyone.

All three of them try. New Elaine and Lysa show up three times a day, trying to dress you and squeeze their way past you into the room but after enough shrieking they always leave you be.

New Leo usually tries once or twice a day, you don’t even look at him. You always stare at the floor, when he tries to speak you give him the same treatment as the girls, screaming at him and slamming the door.

Why should you let them in? You know what they are. They’re here to spy on you, to be Kodo’s eyes while he’s busy being king. They’re easy to evade. When you leave to fetch yourself food or a book from the library you easily outrun them. The two girls are worse at navigating the castle than you were when you first arrived and new Leo has a bad leg, sometimes he’ll make attempts to limp after you but they’re always unsuccessful.

You think of nothing, day after day because there is nothing to think about.

Except for the fact that Kodo took your future away from you. He took everything from you.

If you thought time was blending before Din’s death nothing could have prepared you for now. You don’t track the days as well, you keep your curtains drawn and only leave when you get hungry or start to think of Din. The last thing you need to do is have another screaming fit so you keep him locked away in your heart, an ache that’s always there that you don’t address.

One day, in a fit of tears you took your knife and decided on a whim to kill Kodo. You didn’t care about the repercussions at that point you just wanted him to suffer but the moment you opened the door you nearly tripped, stumbling backwards the guards didn’t so much as glance at you.

Another vase of flowers.

You’re tempted to just kick them down the hall but you can’t help yourself when you lean down to pick them up.

A bouquet of blue lilies. Your nose twitches at the sight of them, out of the corner of your eye you see new Lysa and new Elaine approaching so you take the opportunity to slam the little glass vase into the stone floor. Glaring at them when you do before returning to your room.

☆

Maybe it’s been three days since Din died.

Maybe it’s been three months.

You aren’t sure.

You aren’t sure when you made plans to kill Kodo either but suddenly you have them. A fool proof way to get him alone.

And suddenly you’re dressed for the first time in, well, however long it’s been. In a baby blue nightie with a robe you march out into the hall. The guards watch in silence as you walk away, your bare feet scampering down the stairs until you find yourself watching the main entrance. Waiting for your loving husband to make his nightly trip to a pleasure house, a trip that is typically accompanied by guards.

You grip the handle of the knife in your pocket as you wait until you finally hear footsteps approaching.

“Kodo, honey?” You step out from behind the stone column, holding your robe closed as you bat your eyelashes at him. He stumbles around drunkenly until his eyes focus on you.

You’ve only used your voice for screaming for so long you sound meek, exactly as you want to right now.

“Wife?”

“I thought maybe you’d like to join me tonight…” You hold a hand out towards him, putting on a sickly sweet tone of innocence. His mouth twists into a grin.

“I knew you’d come around eventually.”

He doesn’t question where you’re taking him, he simply follows.

What a joke.

You pull him up the stairs, you know from hide and seek where to find an empty room so you guide him there in calculated silence until he trips a bit, laughing to himself as he stutters.

“I knew if I got rid of the Mandalorian you’d realize how much better I am than him.” The statement doesn’t sit right with you and he can see it on your face, even in his drunken state he can sense your confusion.

You both stop, you’re above him on the stairs as you turn and stare into his eyes.

“You- you knew?”

He simply nods, that sickening smile of his is plastered on his face. His icy blue eyes shimmer with delight.

“How long?”

“When Leo told me I remembered everything. That little altercation in the hall when your boy knocked me out came right back to me, from there it wasn’t hard to figure out.” Your eye twitches as he speaks.

He knew you loved him and he took him from you anyway.

Any hesitations you had are gone as you nod, pulling him onward until you reach the large vacant tower room. He’s so drunk you decide to just drop the voice, pointing at a spot on the floor.

“Lay down.” You mumble, reaching into your pocket once more.

He eagerly does as he’s told, laying down on the cold stone, you take a deep breath, in one swift motion you grab your knife, holding it behind your back as you toss your robe aside. He gives you a toothy grin as you ever so slowly walk to him, standing above him before sitting, straddling his waist.

You look him up and down, one last time.

Your loving husband.

One of his hands plays with the blue lace of your nightie as you collect yourself. You look up at the ceiling briefly.

I’m sorry.

Not for Kodo, but for Din. This is exactly what he didn’t want you to do.

You aren’t a killer. And you aren’t hateful, but a person can only be pushed so far before something breaks.

Be smart.

You think of Din’s note one last time before you bring the blade out in front of you and slam the blade into Kodo’s chest.

He makes a sickly wet sound, coughing as he stares at you in shock.

You remove the knife, the hot steel cauterizes his wounds, there isn’t so much as a drop of blood as your face twists with fury and you bring it down again into his stomach now.

How dare he look surprised by any of this.

After what he took from you? He deserves galaxies worse.

So you remove the knife.

And you stab him again.

And again,

and again,

and again.

Until there is no more shocked look on his face. You don’t have a snarky remark or a statement to commemorate your revenge, you’re all used up at this point, all you have is this, this stabbing motion.

He didn’t even have a chance to fight back.

You crawl off of his body, sitting on the stones as you toss the knife to the side, waiting for a rush of euphoria.

But it never comes.

It doesn’t feel as good as you thought it would.

Staring down at Kodo’s lifeless body. You let yourself crumble. Collapsing down onto the floor, gasping for air as you sob.

This was never going to bring him back.

You lay there on your hands and knees for quite some time, just wailing, because what else are you supposed to do right now? You realize far too late that this was never an act of malice, some demented and shattered part of you thought that this would somehow bring him back, that it would give you peace.

They won’t execute you.

You planned this exactly so they wouldn’t.

Kodo didn’t tell anyone about your relationship with Din in much detail, not enough for them to assume that you could be with child. Everyone will assume that it’s Kodo’s. They won’t kill you, they can’t.

Not if they think you’re carrying Kodo’s child. Now that Kodo’s dead, there’s no one to tell the royal family that you never consummated your marriage, your child is the most well protected person on the planet. The future monarch. It’s almost funny, you haven’t permitted yourself to think about the stirring within you as a child until just now, in this moment of weakness. A child, your child.

Who will most likely grow up without a mother because of the decisions you've made today.

You bite your fist, swallowing a scream as you sit back on your heels.

Your child will never know how loved they were. Your little one will never get to sit beside their mother while their father teaches them to sew. You put your head in your hands as you wail, no longer caring who hears. Your fate is sealed, what does it matter?

You don’t turn when you hear someone coming up the stairs. When they pull you into their arms you try uselessly to shove them away. Your vision is blurry and filled with tears as you stare up at the unfamiliar figure now holding you. They rub your back, drawing swirls and stars against your spine as they pull you closer.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” They mumble into your hair. You dry your eyes hastily on your sleeve, confused by the voice you’re hearing, it’s painfully familiar, on instinct you wrap your arms around their torso, pulling yourself into their lap as you both sit on the floor beside Kodo’s body. “You’re okay, I’m here.”

“I’m- I’m sorry.” You whisper against the stranger's shirt. You knew you weren’t hateful. You’re certain of it now because even though he took quite literally everything from you, you still feel bad when you look at Kodo.

A large hand cups your face, pulling you back to their chest so you can’t see the corpse anymore.

“I didn’t mean it- I- I didn’t mean to kill him. Well I did but I just-” You begin to ramble as a fresh flood of tears begin sliding down your cheeks.

“Hey- hey it’s okay. I know you didn’t mean it. We gotta get you cleaned up, okay? I’ll take care of this, I’ll fix it.” Their arms tighten around you, giving you a reassuring squeeze. You finally find the courage to look at your companion and it takes a moment for you to even realize who you’re looking at.

New Leo.

Why would he help you? You treat him like shit. When you look at him he looks like he’s about to cry and for the first time since Din was taken from you drop the walls you’ve put up and you let yourself feel bad for him. You show an ounce of kindness to him because in all honesty he’s the first person to make you feel safe since the night Din was taken from you.

A lighthouse while you sail through a storm.

So you hug him.

You pull yourself closer to him and you offer him a comfort you haven’t known for days.

“I’m sorry… for all of it, but especially the flowers, I should have told you, I just- you wouldn’t let me and the guards wouldn’t let me in without your permission and you just wouldn’t look at me.” He begins to mumble his own apologies, sending a surge of confusion through you.

You furrow your brows, pulling back once more giving him a perplexed look as you search his nearly black eyes for some kind of answer.

And it clicks.

All at once it snaps into place and you want to say his name, so desperately, but you’re terribly afraid of being wrong.

And then he smiles. A soft smile that makes you feel okay and you don’t even care if you’re wrong and you don’t care if it doesn’t make sense you just have to ask.

“Din?”

☆

a/n : yeah so uhhhhh yeah uhhhh this is the first chapter i've ever written where im actually very fond of the writing and nervous about the plot stuff so im gonna go hide?? and just vanish for a while lol

I don't have a tag list anymore !! follow @lincolndjarinnotifs for updates!!

#lincolndjarin #the mandalorian #best kept secret #bks #din djarin #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian x you #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin fanfiction #mandalorian smut #din djarin smut #pedro pascal #din djarin/reader #din djarin/you

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breeloveschris · 2 months

Text

Eyes Like The Ocean

Pt 2

Pairing: Chris x Reader

Summery: Just a girl on vacation at her beach house who meets a boy on the beach, what happens when she has to go back home.

Warnings: cussing, mentions of loss of a parent (briefly talked about)

Breespeaks: new series!! Eyes Like The Ocean. I hope y’all enjoy and I promise you guys this will be so much better then you’ll never understand, keep in mind, You’ll never understand was my first work ever.. lol anyways! Enjoy:)

I quickly made my way out of the cafe, and making a beeline to my car just wanting to get home already.

I’ve been working for the past 9 hours, and I just wanna take a shower and crawl in bed. Today’s already started off shitty when I was called into work on my day off.

Somehow in the first two hours of being at work I ended up spilling coffee all over me, I also had a middle aged man throw a whole drink all over my outfit.

All because there were no seats left and I wouldn’t tell people to move. Shame on me I guess.

I drove the 10 minute drive from work to my home, well Apartment. As soon as I got into my house I went straight to my closet grabbing a sweatshirt and some shorts.

I took a two hour long shower, I didn’t even notice the coffee all in the tips of my hair until I started taking off my clothes. It was an everything shower type of day.

As soon as I got out of the shower I went straight to my couch and turned on Bambi, my favorite movie.

I’ve been living in New Jersey since I was 8, I moved here from Boston Massachusetts. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss Boston, but New Jersey is also where my family is and I don’t know what id do without my sister and her husband.

My sister is 5 years older than me, She’s 23 with a husband and a nice house. If I look up to anyone it’s her, she has her life together more than our mother ever did.

Every spring we go to Cape Cod, we have a cute little family home down near the beach. Last year we didn’t get to go because Allies husband was sick.

We plan on going in two days, and if everything checks out we will be there. And let’s just say I’m beyond excited, I miss it there.

I was scrolling through TikTok when I got a FaceTime call from my sister, “hey Allie!” I said with a smile as I paused the movie. “Hey, I was just calling to make sure you’re still down to go” she said smirking as if I’d ever decline the offer to spend a week in Cape Cod.

“Girl stop playing, you know that I’m always down” I said getting up and walking to the kitchen, setting my phone up so she could still see me as I grabbed chicken nuggets from the freezer.

“Yeah.. I’m sorry about last year, he got sick so randomly.” She said with a frown, “it’s okay, we’re going this year” I said with a shrug as I threw the chicken nuggets in the air fryer.

“Whoop whoop” I heard Gavin shout in the background.

I laughed and shook my head as I put my elbow on the counter and leaned on my hand. “How was work?, you look like you’ve had a long day” Gavin said with a small laugh.

“Dude! This guy threw a drink all over me because I wouldn’t tell other customers to move” I said groaning, “wow, remind me to never work in the food industry ever again” Allie said laughing. I laughed and shook my head.

“I wasn’t even supposed to go in today, but they said since I won’t be here Friday I should go in for someone else so they can take my shift on Friday” I said rolling my eyes.

We talked for 2 hours, and as soon as we got off the phone I started the movie over so I could listen to it as I clean and lock the house up.

I went to bed as soon as I got done with all the house work, I turned my fan on high and went straight to sleep.

I woke up very early going straight to my bathroom to brush my teeth and brush my hair, I looked into the mirror and smiled “One more day” I whispered.

I walked back into my room sighing, time to deep clean this room so I can come back to a clean room. Right after I spend an hour on TikTok, I thought with a smirk as I jumped on my bed.

I’ve been cleaning my room for the past two hours when I heard a knock on my door, I furrowed my eyebrows not expecting anyone to come over.

I walked to my door and opened it revealing a bag of Taco Bell with a note stuck to it. I picked it up and walked inside placing the bag on the counter and taking the note off to read it.

“Don’t forget to eat, and make sure you pack bathing suits, I really don’t feel like shopping for some as soon as we get there cause you forgot <3 Allie”

I laughed and shook my head, I ran into my room picking up my phone sending a quick thank you to her. I walked back into the kitchen and ate my Taco Bell because I’ve been up for 3 hours and still haven’t ate.

After I got done eating I went into my room to change, I changed into a sweatshirt and sweatpants as it’s always cold in my apartment.

I started to pack pretty early because it usually takes me over 2 hours to pack, I’m indecisive as fuck.

It indeed took me two hours and 56 minutes to pack, but I got it done and that’s all that matters. I honestly just wanna go to sleep now so I can hurry up and wake up in the morning.

We’re leaving at 6:30 in the morning because we have a 5 hour drive and we want to make it there before lunch.. before all the tourists get there.

I don’t have many friends. I only have one friend, Alyssa. She lives in the cape, So I only get to see her once a year and we FaceTime through the year. It’s hard but we make it work.

I put on some random movie on as I started to deep clean the living room.

I was about 30 minutes into cleaning when I found an old picture. More specifically, a picture of my dad. Tears immediately sprung to my eyes, my dad was my best friend and the only reason why our family stayed together.

He was the best dad around for as long as he could be, he passed away when I was 16. Luckily my sister was already moved out so I was able to just go live with her instead having to get a hold of my mother.

I sighed and wiped my eyes, standing up and walking over to my mirror in the hallway and putting it with all my other pictures that littered my mirror.

I continued to clean the living room for another hour and a half. I finally finished, the only reason why it took me so long was because the kitchen is connected to the living room so I also cleaned the kitchen.

I took a shower and did my nightly routine before putting all of the stuff that I use in my bookbag, besides my toothbrush and hairbrush. I laid in bed for like an hour before actually drifting off.

I got rudely woken up by someone shaking me, I gasped and jumped back. I opened my eyes wide to look at my intruder, just seeing my sister.

I groaned loudly and threw my pillow at her face, “you bitch” I said rubbing my eyes sighing.

“Always sleep with one eye open baby sis, I don’t understand how you still get scared when you know I have a key” she said shaking her head. “Well usually you don’t come in here shaking me like a damn earthquake” I said glaring at her.

“Girl, put a smile on your face. We’re going to the cape!! Oh by the way Gavin has already taken your shit to the car” she said with a laugh, “Allie!! I needed to put my toothbrush in my bookbag” I said throwing my head back.

“Stop yapping and get ready, I wanna leave” she said dragging out leave. I roll my eyes and get off the bed as Allie left, probably to rummage through my snacks.

I go to my closet changing into a pair of sweat shorts, and a cropped baby pink tank top. I went to the bathroom and brushed my hair and teeth, bringing both brushes and my toothpaste out into the living room.

As soon as I walk in the living room I see Gavin and Allie sitting on my couch talking, I coughed showing that I was there. Gavin whipped his head around and jumped up running over towards me, he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder and spinning me around.

We all busted out laughing as he placed me back to the ground. “Dude your gonna give me a headache and I haven’t even been around you for more then 10 seconds” I said with a laugh.

“Hey! That’s very rude.” He said pouting, “boohoo, can you hold this” I said as I pushed what was in my hands to his chest which he grabbed.

I turned around immediately and started walking to my room, “what the fuck am I supposed to do with this Y/n?!” he said with raised eyebrows. I just shrugged and flipped him off over my shoulder.

“Go put it in the car Gavin” Allie said with a laugh, I turned around and pointed at her “ding ding ding” I said with a smirk.

I turn back around and walk through my door, walking back into my closet I grabbed a pair of socks and my white Nike platform tennis shoes.

We made our way to the car after locking up my apartment and grabbing the things I didn’t pack before because they were still in use.

When we got to the car I hopped into the back groaning and jumping back out. “What?” Allie asked as she climbed into the drivers seat, “I forgot my blanket” I said as I turned around running up the stairs back to my apartment.

I got my blanket and even brought a pillow because it’s a 5 hour drive and I’m hoping to get some sleep.

We were an hour into the drive when Allie and Gavin wanted to switch because Allie didn’t feel like driving anymore, I’m assuming, I don’t really know because I have my headphones on blaring some old lil skies.

We made it to the beach right at 11:40. I yawned and rubbed my eyes, “get up loser, we home” Allie said from the front. “Bitch I’m awake” I said shaking my head with a laugh, “yea bitch she’s awake” Gavin said from the trunk making me and Allie whip our heads around.

“Gavin!” Me and Allie both said at the same time which made us all fall over laughing.

I opened my door with a big smile and breathing in the salty air with closed eyes. “Oh how I’ve missed you” I whispered, “oh hell nah, don’t you start that shit” Gavin said shaking his head and moving his finger side to side as to say no.

“Dude shut up, I’m talking to my favorite place” I said as I held up a hand towards him. I turned and looked at the beautiful beige, one story house, my smile only growing.

“Allie! Gimme the keys.. right now!” I said turning to her, she tossed them to me and I made a bee line to the door only stopping to get my bags from Gavin, I’ll get my stuff from the car later.

I ran my fingers along side of the fingers as I walked towards my room. I walked into my room seeing everything was exactly how i left it.

I opened the balcony door that was in my room and stepped out, the weather is so nice, probably like 85 degrees.

I was just looking out at the ocean from the balcony, I never wanna leave this place.

I felt hands on my shoulders which made me jump and gasp turning around quick, seeing Allie. “If you don’t stop fucking scaring me” I said rolling my eyes.

“My bad, I just wanted to see if you wanted to go down to the beach with me. Gavin said he didn’t want too because “he’s tired” but I really want too” she said holding her hands together like she was begging me.

“Girl bye, you had me at beach” I said smirking, she yelled out a loud “Yahooo” I punched her arm and pushed her inside. We were laughing so hard that Gavin came in and looked at us like he just saw a ghost which made us laugh harder.

Allie left my room so I could change, I changed into a cute blue floral bikini that showed my little sun tattoo just on my hip. I threw my phone on the bed as I walked out of my room.

We walked down the cute flower trail we have in the backyard leading to the beach.

We made it to the beach with huge smiles, it wasn’t that crowded at all, our favorite. We looked at each other and smirked “Last one in has to pay for dinner” I said as I dashed towards the ocean. “Your cheating?!” Allie said running after me, I just laughed as I jumped in.

I came back up and looked around me to find Allie, I couldn’t find her anywhere until I felt arms around my shoulder as I was getting flung back under the water. I came back up laughing and looking at her “you bitch” I said shaking my head.

“That’s your favorite word today huh?” She said laughing, I just shrugged “maybe” I said with a smirk. She just laughed and shook her head.

I sighed and looked around trying to see if I could see any familiar faces. I ended up locking eyes with a boy who looked around my age, he had the prettiest eyes, he has eyes like the ocean that’s for sure.

He smirked and waved, my cheeks went rosy as a small smile spread across my face, he looked away a few seconds later. I hope I see more of him.

“Y/n!” Allie whispered as she pushed my shoulder, “what?” I asked as I turned around. “That dude was totally checking you out” she said as she nodded her head in his direction, “no, he was just being polite, I was looking first” I said shrugging.

“Bro.. catch a dick or something” she said smirking, I gasped “Allie!!” I said pushing her under the water. She came up laughing, “live a little, you’re only 19” she said smiling. This trip is gonna be so much fun.

Breespeaks pt 2: phewwww she’s a long one hehe, do we like it? Are we excited?? Idk about y’all but I’m fs excited. Also if you’d like to be tagged in this series please comment here

Taglist: @stuniolobbg @iloveneilperry @freshloveforthefit @nicksmainbitch @junnniiieee07 @sturniolosreads @novasturniolo03 @robins-scoop @jennss23 @hearts4chriss @creamoncreamoncream2 @tcvazq @bunbunbl0gs @lacysturniolo @chrisloyalgf @lilsstvrn @youaremyfiveever @whicked-hazlatwhore @gnxosblog @annamcdonalds67 @1blowyourmind @ilovedasturniolos @bellbottombaby @pinklittleflower @dlyansworld @sleepdeprivedandinsane @sttzee e @sturniololol @emerald-09 @kqyslyho3 @beardedstudentsuit @ifilwtmfc @sturnssmuts @luverboychris @bitterspoons @jada-lockwood

(I tagged everyone so y’all could see it, but I will be making a separate taglist so please lmk)

#chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #nick sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo #christopher owen sturniolo #nate doe #nathan doe #chris sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo x you #chris sturniolo x reader #cape cod #boston massachusetts #new jeresy #cafe

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xxblairexxss · 9 months

Text

We’ll be fine

Pairing : Charles Leclerc x reader

Theme : Angst, fluff

Word count : 4.7k

Requested!

Relationships aren’t all sunshines and rainbows. Charles and you were trying so hard to maintain this long distance relationships but everything seemed to be going the wrong way. Was it the miscommunication, the lack of reassurance or was it because of your job?

The FaceTime’s outgoing ringtone blasted through your Macbook’s speaker, giving you a jolt, though you had bern waiting for it for the past 30 minutes.

"God, I miss you so much, baby."

The sight of your boyfriend in red, all sweaty, made you all giddy like a high school teenager. "Hi, boyfriend! Congratulations on the P3!" He went on to talk about the race and everything you had missed for not being able to join him this weekend while you rested your chin on your palm whilst listening to him.

"No way! You saw the same cut board again? Was it from the same person?" You asked; your work-related stuff was long forgotten.

"I'm not sure about that, but it freaked me out a little bit seeing my face that big over and over."

You cackled. He had propped his phone against his stuff, so you got a good look at him while he sorted out things before the press conference. It made you feel as if you were there with him.

This was the first time in a while that you didn’t get into an argument during a 10-minute video call. A few weeks ago, as frequent as it was, Charles and you would always get into an argument, sometimes one that lasted for days. It was all because of your new job and the upcoming summer break.

When you first got the offer, you could see Charles wasn’t too elated about it. It didn’t mean he was unhappy to see you step up into another chapter of your life. He was so ecstatic that he even prepared a small celebration and gifts to celebrate it. For the whole week after you told him about your promotion, that was all he ever talked about.

"I’m so proud of you."

"My hardworking girl"

"You deserved it so much".

Those were the words he kept on showering you with, like a mantra.

But those words eventually turned into fatalistic, forcing you to accept the culpability of the constant disagreement in the relationship.

"Not this again, Y/N."

"I just don’t understand why it’s so hard for you."

"I’m doing this for us too!"

"Am I the only one who gives a fuck about this relationship?"

Being able to talk to him and seeing him all smile with eyes full of accolades and longing for the touch from you erased all of the tainted spots.

That was until he called you again that night. When you told him about your upcoming project was when he blew up all over again. You saw it coming. Even before you picked up the call, before you had arranged those words in your head.

"What do you mean you can’t join me next week? Y/N, it’s my summer break. Don’t you want to spend some time together?"

You covered your face with your hands, internally screaming. He always acted as if you had a choice to reject every offer that the company had arranged for you. As if you didn’t care about this relationship as much as he did. "They asked me to take over the project. I can’t say no."

"I haven’t seen you in weeks." He muttered.

"I wanted to see you too, Charles, but..."

"Don’t say that." He heckled. You saw him roll his eyes, moving away from the camera. "Don’t say shit like that just to make me feel better. I know you don’t actually mean any of it."

"Charles, I really wanted to see you but I can’t say no!" You yelled out, desperately trying to make him see things from your point of view.

"Bullshit." He sniggered.

"What?"

"What if I tell you, Oh, I missed you so much, I can’t wait to see you, then chose to spend the weekend with my friends after saying all that? It sounds bullshit to you, isn’t it?" He shook his head, as if what you said vexed him even more.

“I wasn’t spending the weekend with my friends. I’m working! It’s a different case.” You argued back, feeling unfair from his reactions.

"I’m going to sleep. Good night."

"Already? But I thought we could talk some more. I wanted to hear your story, I wanted to tell you about happen to me on my way to work this morning.." Your pleas were ignored as he stayed silent, looking as if he were so ready to click the end call button. "It’s okay then. Good night. I love you.”

The call ended. Well, he ended the call without saying it back.

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The summer break came around. Just like any other year, Charles would spend a week with his friends and the other week with his family. You would always join him, but not this year.

You have seen videos and pictures of his friends laughing, teasing each other, and filming funny videos here and there while you were stuck in your office.

Charles would still text you; he would wish you good morning and good night; he would ask you if you had eaten and if you needed him to arrange a food delivery for you; but he never spoke about the summer break anymore. In one way, it just felt like he had erased the words from his mind. Though you still saw pictures and videos of him on his yacht, riding his jet ski, you never asked him about it—basically anything that involved the break—because you just didn’t want to get into another fit of disagreement and his failure to see your situation.

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"What are you having for dinner, baby? I can’t see." He was in his bed, barely keeping himself awake after the full-blown activities in the sea today while you were just getting ready to eat your dinner.

"I’m having sushi!" His eyes widen at the huge selection when you tilted the plate of sushi.

"That’s a lot! You got carried away with the menu again, didn’t you?"

"Yeah.." Your lips were pressed in a thin line, shoulder-sloping like a child who got into trouble.

"Can you actually finish that, love?"

"Obviously no! I’ll figure out a way to not waste any of this." Picking a salmon out of 20 more selections on the plate, you dipped the end into the small plate of soy sauce and devoured one, smiling at the fresh, delectable taste.

"You know I can’t finish them for you. I’m like thousands of miles away." Charles was propping his chin on his hand, forcing himself to stay awake.

"I know. I miss you a lot." You covered your mouth, holding your laugh, when his chin slipped off his palm and he nearly slammed his head against the pillow. "You know you can go to sleep, right? I am fine eating dinner on my own."

"No, I want to stay awake and watch my girlfriend eat her sushi."

You stuck out your tongue and scrunched your nose, making him chuckle. "Which one should I try next?" You moved the phone a little so he could get a full view of the plate again.

"Try the scallop one, baby. It looks good."

You picked the one he chose with your chopstick and ate it up, letting out a squeal of excitement when the taste activated your taste buds. "It’s so good! You would have liked this one."

Charles eventually fell asleep before you could finish your so called eating show. He fell asleep hugging the pillow, which acted as your replacement because he always had trouble sleeping without you. He even asked you to leave a travel-size perfume of yours the next time you came home, just so it felt much more pragmatic in his mind.

Unknowingly to him, you had requested leave from absence home earlier this week, and it was just approved by your supervisor today. It was only for a week, but at least you could see your boyfriend and spend time with him this summer.

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Charles came home, and he was confounded by how tidy his apartment looked. The pile of clothes he had set aside in the laundry room to be washed was gone, and the washing machine was on as it was counting down to 15 minutes, rotating and spinning his clothes. He had left the house quite in a hurry this morning, so he expected it to be out of place, just like how he left it.

"Surprise!"

He sprang back, his head hitting the wall when you jumped out from behind the door as he was about to walk in, causing him to bend down, his hand holding the crown of his head.

"Oh my God! I’m so sorry!" You chortled, covering your mouth from the loud thud sound as you hugged him.

"Ow, I think I got a concussion, baby." He buried his face against your neck as you cradled him like a child. "Why didn’t you tell me you were coming home?"

"I wanted to give you a surprise! And a concussion." You stroked his hair, barely able to breathe from the tight grip around your waist.

"God, I missed you so, so much." He planted a trail of kisses along your shoulder blade up to your jawline and ended it on your lips, only pulling away when both of you were out of breath. "I missed you, baby."

"I missed you more. I’m all yours, love. No more hugging pillows!" You snaked your arms around his neck, giggling when you felt his lips on your nose.

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"Y/N, baby, no. I just changed!"

You saw a perfect opportunity when he was standing at the edge of the yacht, seemingly to be in very deep thoughts, so you dashed into him, making him lose his balance as he grabbed you by your arm and pulled you with him back into the water.

"Why do you have to do that?!" You cried out, splashing the water on him with a frown.

"Oh, are you mad at me? Really, baby?" He laughed and lead you back to the yacht as it started getting a bit chilly. You still refused to talk to him, even when he wrapped you in a new towel and engulfed you in a hug. He, however, found the whole situation funny. "Okay, baby, I’m sorry for pulling you into the water. I should have been the only one cold in the sea. " Charles finally surrendered when you seemed to be so in persistent with your sulking attempt.

Rolling your eyes, you fell into a fit of laughter as you threw yourself on him, making him lay down with you on the lounge seats. "I’m just kidding!" You cupped his cheeks and brushed your lips on his. "You are so cute!"

"You make me the happiest man in the world." He caressed your cheeks while you braced yourself on his body. Everything was just so perfect you never wanted this moment to end. Just getting lost in those green eyes gave you a vivid view of the beautiful landscapes. The way you felt his soft, loving touch on your face, trailing the structure of your face tucked on your heart, just when you thought you couldn’t fell in love with this man even more.

"I love you so much, baby." He mumbled, drumming his fingers on your chin, which made you chuckle.

"I love you even more, love."

"Let’s stay like this for a little while. I missed having you in my arms." He leaned his head back on the seats, wishing for the time to stop because everything—literally everything—was just so perfect for him.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

"Baby?"

"Yeah?" Charles came to the kitchen, leaning against the counter while you still had your eyes on your tea, stirring it after you put a spoonful of sugar.

"Mom wished you could join the family’s vacation next week. Is there any way you can extend your leave?"

"I’m so sorry, love, but I need to be at the office by next week." Since you were working on a new project at the moment, it was difficult for you to be absent even more when you already got a week off though you knew right away you would have to pull an all-nighter once you touchdown tomorrow just to go through all those unreplied emails.

"Y/N, please. For me," He held your hand, which was circled around the mug. “For us.”

"Charles, this isn’t about us. You know—"

"Here we go again. I’m the only one who has to tolerate, give in, and follow your schedule. Y/N, this relationship isn’t about you all alone." His voice was louder now, half shouting as he left the kitchen.

"Yes, I know, Charles. I know! You are not the only one who has to ride the wave right now. You are not the only one giving in. I had been with you in every race that I could though I had to constantly fly back and forth. I have told you I was required to be at the office even more now that we’re working on a new project. Once it is all done and sorted out, my schedule will be more manageable. A couple of months is all I ask! I’m so tired of explaining this over and over, but you still keep on thinking I am being selfish in this matter. I am mentally and emotionally drained every single day! I spent hours in the office, coming home, expecting my boyfriend to be my comfort, but you kept on shouting and cursing at me." Your cup of tea was long forgotten as you trudged along his steps to the living room. "I took a leave for one week, hoping it would make you happy, but it is still not enough for you. I don’t know what you want me to do!"

"No one forced you to take the job, Y/N. You have no right to complain about that. I told you numerous times that I can always support you financially." You grabbed his wrists, tugging on them harshly to make him face you.

"That’s not how it works, Charles! I don’t want you to support me with your money. Just because I want and love this job doesn’t mean I can’t get tired of it. I’m a human with a capability to an extent. I just want you to be there for me when I need you." Charles looked away, hands clenched into a fist, when you started choking back tears.

"I feel like you are more scared to lose your precious job than you are losing me, Y/N. It’s more important than me, isn’t it? Your job." He snickered, his head shaking at how absurd this whole argument was.

"I got fired for leaving abruptly during my meeting because you got into a crash. I stayed with you for days, taking care of you, ignoring every call and text from my boss because you were all I could think about, and I could go insane if I wasn’t by your side, waiting for you to wake up. I had to build my career back up. Yes, this is my dream job, but I would drop everything again for you, and you know that too." You harshly wiped another trail of tears on your cheeks. You just wanted to rip your hair out because he kept on turning this back to you, as if you never sacrificed anything for him.

"Are you trying to blame me because you got fired? Is that what you meant? Y/N, that was on you!" Charles hollered, making you flinch as he pointed his finger at your face.

"That’s not it! If something happened to me and you left your race for me, would you blame me for that? No, you wouldn’t! Because there’s no one to blame! That’s what I—" Your words came to a pause when you saw him simpered. "Are you—Charles, what’s with that smile?" Your grip on his arm tightens to get his attention. "Are you saying you wouldn’t leave your career for me? Charles!" He tried to walk away, and you grabbed his shirt, yanking it. "Don’t just walk away! Answer me!" You pulled on his shirt again. "Charles!"

"Don’t ask me that! You and I are not the same, Y/N. Our career, our way of thinking, it’s just not the same."

It hurt. It hurt because you thought you meant a lot to him. You didn’t even want him to choose either one, but the fact that he acted as if your career and his weren’t on the same level shredded your heart to pieces. It was as if your career were nothing compared to his. Sure, it wasn’t one where people paid thousands to see; it wasn’t a career where you got paid hundreds of thousands, even millions, per year, but he, out of all people, knew how hard you worked for it, so you never expected him to disparage your career in front of your face.

"I don’t think I’m the one being selfish right now." He saw you walk past him into the bedroom with your head dropped. It was your last night before you had to fly back tomorrow, and he had ruined everything again. You had actually planned to bake cookies together just so the two of you could spend more time together for the last night, but the whole apartment is cold now, and there was no other sound except your irregular sob.

He stayed up, placing all those ingredients for cookies that you had arranged on the kitchen counter back to where it was. You were so excited to try the new cookie cutter, and he felt so bad for blowing up again.

"Y/N?"

You tugged on the cover, half hiding your face when you heard him walk in. It might not be as convincing as it was, but you held your sob, trying to control your shoulders from shaking too much, so it seemed as if you were already asleep since you didn’t want to talk to him. Not anymore. You were so tired. You would have packed and left right away if only you could, but you knew he would block your moves, holding you back and you didn’t want that to happen because you would have given in again. What you thought was a bad attempt was still able to convince him that you were asleep.

"Good night." He slanted over and pecked at your cheek before getting under the cover and facing the other way. He knew he didn’t deserve to hug nor touch you after making you cry yourself to sleep.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

Charles woke up, frowning, when a shaft of sunlight sipping through the curtain hit his face. "Baby, the sun is blinding me again." He mumbled and shifted to your side of the bed to hide his face against your neck, but all he could feel was a chilly, cold space. "Baby?" He called out a little louder and still didn’t get any response. "Y/N—" He was stunned when he realised your phone, hair tie, and your stuffs on the dressing table were gone. "Fuck!" The fatigue and drowsiness were gone in a blink as he threw the duvet off, feeling himself getting warm even though the AC was frigid.

"Y/N," He went through every room, and all of your clothes were gone. It was as if you were never here for the whole week. “No, no, no, no.”

Your phone was off when he tried to call, and none of his text messages went through. He even went to the airport because he knew your flight was 4 hours away, and he spent hours walking around to look for you, but to no avail. He would have kept you in his arms if he knew last night would be the last time he saw you.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

"Y/N! How are you? Oh my God!" Carla’s eyes widened. Just like any other day, Carla, Arthur’s girlfriend, would ring you just to update you on your life. You met her years ago when she and Arthur started dating, and ever since then, it had been like having a new baby sister. She was also the only one who knew your new phone number. And like always, you guys would talk for hours about everything, and though she never came here to New York, she was basically familiar with your apartment. This time around, you just didn’t happen to be in the apartment when you picked up the call. You were in the hospital, head wrapped up in a bandage, and your hand was as stiff as a rock from the hand cast. "What happened to you?" She yelled out.

"I got into an accident last night. No, two days ago. It wasn’t that bad, though." She rolled her eyes, finding it hard to believe when you winced from the pain as you tried to play it all cool.

"How did you get into an accident? That looks really bad, Y/N! You should tell Charles!"

Charles. It’s been nearly a month since the last time you left his apartment without confronting him. You remember staring at him that night while he slept, like a creep, thinking if you were making the right choice and decided there was no point staying in a relationship where you and him never see things at the same level. You changed your phone number because you knew he would spam your calls, and you knew the moment you heard his voice, pleading and begging you to forgive him, you would crawl your way back to him.

"No, don’t tell him. You promised me you wouldn’t tell anything to him or Arthur. I don’t know if you can call it an accident, but I lost my balance and fell down the stairs at the office. It wasn’t that bad, but I do need a few stitches on my forehead."

"That’s so bad! Why didn’t you tell me sooner? Just so you know, if he finds out that I knew about this and didn’t tell him, you need to back me up. How long do you have to be at the hospital? Are you okay all alone?"

"Yeah! I’m completely fine on my own. I will be discharged tomorrow!" The hand cast was actually quite heavy, and it was hard for you to do things on your own, but you’ll manage.

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

"Why are you laughing?"

Clara put her phone away from her face, still giggling at the picture that you sent to her. It was a picture of you trying to make a thumbs up with your broken hand because she wanted proof that you had safely arrived at your apartment.

"Oh, it was Y/N!" She chuckled, turning her phone back to show her boyfriend the picture. "Look!"

Arthur blinked in surprise. He wasn’t expecting that at all. "What happened to her?"

"Oh, um—"

"What’s wrong?" Charles intervened, his eyes now on the couple.

Before Clara could make up a lie, her boyfriend was quick on his act. "Y/N. She was covered in bandages. Is that a bandage? Yeah, it is. Oh, it’s a hand cast." Arthur confirmed it himself after double-checking the picture on his girlfriend’s phone.

"What?" Charles furrowed his brows and took Clara’s phone from her hand. "What happened to her? Why didn’t you tell me about this?"

"She told me not to tell you. But she’s fine! Well, she said she’s fine." Clara stated, seeing how the older guy started heading out with only a few of his stuffs.

"Where are you going?" Arthur asked, chasing after his brother.

"I’m going to see her."

"What? You mean right now?" The younger one yelled out. "Has my brother gone mad?"

﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎﹎

"One second!"

You ran from your room, anticipating another delivery from your window shopping gone wrong, and you ended up with 10 parcels that was supposed to arrive by today.

"Hi! You can just put the box here. I— oh,"

Charles was stunned. You were in a short with an oversized jumper, your hair tied up in a messy bun with your bangs pinned back where he could see the stitches right above your brows.

"Can I—can I come in?" His questioned, dragging you back into reality.

"My house is a mess." That was a bad one. You couldn’t come up with a better excuse, and he was still waiting, evidently disregarding whatever you just said. "Fine, come in. Do you want a drink? Coffee?"

"It’s okay. I’m all good."

"Coffee then." You felt his gaze on the back of your head as you grabbed a mug. The airtight instant coffee jar had to be the most difficult thing to open in one hand, even though you had the front part of your elbow circled around the jar. "Can I just get you water?" His laughter made your cheeks red.

"I’m okay, precious. There’s no need for that." He then marched to stand in front of you, hand cupped on your cheeks as he tilted your head to see the stitches. "What happened?"

"I fell. It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt that much." He was gazing at you, and you could feel the wall you built starting to quiver, so you took a step back.

Charles missed you. He missed you a lot. He knew you would have back away, but it never occurred to him that it would hurt this much to see the woman he loved pull in one’s horns with him. "I—,"

"You can’t do this to me." You cut him off, mumbling with your eyes looking down on your hands. "You can’t come here and touch me, forcing me to fall back and jump on you after the way you treated me."

"I came here to apologise." His voice became a whisper, barely audible to you.

"You have apologised for the million times, but I still got blamed for my career, for choosing to be my own person. Everything I do will always be seen as a selfish act by you. I can never make you happy, Charles."

"You have always made me happy, Y/N. Not my career, not my fame. It was wrong for me to say that, but it wasn’t my intention to disparage your choice, your career, or your life. I know you are not living your life as my girlfriend alone; you have your own dreams. I just got so—" He inhaled, looking away, unable to finish his words.

"Charles.."

He felt your cold hand on his, softly tugging it to get his attention and make him look at you.

"I just— I got so used to having you in my life every second before you moved away.” He pressed his tongue to the roof of his mouth, trying to hold in his tears. "I got so frustrated because I came home and it was cold. I was so used to hearing your voice the second I stepped into the house, so used to you screaming my name when you greet me as if you haven’t seen me for years. You moved away so sudden, and it felt so lonely. I am happy for you, Y/N. I am so happy when you tell me about your days at work. I fell in love all over again when I saw the way your eyes were glistening when you talked about your new, dream job, but I wanted you to be with me. It just felt so distant. I am the selfish one all this time. I’m sorry."

You were a crying mess. You had never seen him this broken before. When you accepted your job offer email, you were so perturbed that you would have a hard time living thousands of miles away from your boyfriend, but it never once occurred to you that he would get the short end of the stick. Instead of saying anything, you cradled his head against your neck.

Charles’ arms went around your waist as he buried his head in your neck, replenishing his longing to have you in his arms for weeks. It had been so long since he held you, taking all that you were, everything he ever needed.

"It is not a bad thing to not be able to see each other every day." You mumbled, pulling away to cup on his cheeks. "It is sad, of course, but having you to miss is a privilege to me."

"I never want to lose you, Y/N."

"We just need more patience, understanding, and trust, Charles. I need you to understand me." His hands went on your back as you rested your head on his chest.

"Can you give us another chance?" He felt it was impossible to hide the slight quaver in his voice, too anxious for the worst thing to come. "I truly understand if you don’t want to because—"

"I’m staying." You leaned away and beamed, stroking your thumb against his cheek. "As long as you’re trying, we are trying, and I’ll stay. We’ll be fine."

“I know I said it otherwise but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t come running to you if something happened. You are my life, Y/N.”

You leaned into his hand, drowning yourself with his touch. “We both need to work on our communication skill. You suck at it.”

He chuckled, pulling you back into his arms. “Yeah, I am so bad it also costs me my happiness.”

“Can you stay here and keep me accompany for a couple of days?” You just couldn’t let him go today so you had to be self-obsessed today if it got him to be with you for at least another day.

“Of course, baby. Though I might need to buy some new clothes because this,” He extended his arms. “This is all I have.”

“You come here with just these?” There wasn’t any luggage, anything that made it seemed as if he were planning to come and visit you.

“Yeah, I came in a rush when I saw the picture you sent to Clara.”

“You are so silly. I only broke my hand!” He laughed along when you lifted up your hand cast, as if it was something normal to break your hand on a random Thursday.

“Only broke your hand? Only? Really, love. You even got stitches.”

✧.* general tag list! @i83andrew @cltrlne @karmabyfernando @ohthemisssery @ru-kru @tastebaldwin @f1obessed @love4lando @shinrjj @ietss @leclerc13 @darleneslane @buckybarnessweetheart @xcinnamongirl @boiohboii @formula1mount @judespoision @alwaysclassyeagle @scenesofobx @mrsmaybank13

If your usernames were crossed, meaning I can’t tag you! Let me know if you would like to be removed or to be added to the tag list! Or if I missed anyone!

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #f1 imagines #charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagines #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #charles leclerc angst #charles leclerc fluff #char

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folkloresthings · 10 months

Text

TOLERATE IT / FA14.

in which the older sister of lando norris finds herself teetering dangerously towards the precipice of her brother’s, significantly older, colleague.

( fernando alonso x norris!reader )

track one: gold rush. track two: delicate. track three: labyrinth. track four: false god. track five: happiness. track six: the 1. track seven: daylight. track eight: lover.

✩⡱ warnings: age gap! reader is 25, fernando is 41.

TWITTER.

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yourusername back in london town

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landonorris mum asked if you’re coming to dinner on sunday?

⤷ yourusername tell her yes, i’ll bring dessert, and please teach her how to text

user queen is back in the same city as me i might cry

lewishamilton i’ll be around next week, we should grab coffee!

⤷ yourusername only if you bring roscoe

⤷ lewishamilton yes ma’am 🫡

user im going to miss her in the paddock :(

⤷ user fingers crossed she’s back after the break

it was rather refreshing, to be back in your own apartment after weeks of living hotel to hotel. knowing where everything is, cooking for yourself, spending every night under your own covers. granted, after nights spent close to fernando’s side, your double bed felt much emptier than it did before.

with the summer break begun, the lack of work was leaving you with little to do. and the apartment had been sitting empty for weeks, desperate for a deep cleaning. so, clad in an old shirt and some shorts, you got to work. halfway through wiping down the entire kitchen, your phone rang, silencing the nineties hits playlist you’d had on.

hurrying over in your fluffy socks, you glanced down at the ringing screen. fernando. you hadn’t seen him since that morning lando had shown up in your hotel room. frankly, after your conversation with your brother, you fled the country as quickly as you could.

“hi,” you greeted him tentatively, after answering the call. he was quiet on the other end, your heart picking up its pace with every moment of silence.

“you left without saying goodbye,” he eventually speaks, voice monotone and heavy. you curse him mentally for being so unreadable, so plain when he wants to be.

you sigh, a finger rubbing your brow bone as you settle yourself on the couch. “i’m sorry, ‘nando.”

you weren’t sure of what else to say. you glanced at the time, ten minutes past eleven, wondering what time it was where fernando was. still in belgium? back home in spain? he wasn’t here, and that seemed to squeeze at your heart.

“so, what does this mean?” the question you had been dreading. the question you had asked yourself the whole plane ride home, and every moment since.

“i don’t know,” you murmured, truthfully. “it’s so complicated. if… if we keep this up, we’ll only get attacked. and lando will constantly be on edge — i don’t know if he could ever really accept it.”

“we could make him—” fernando begins to argue, and you can hear the frustration in his voice now.

“please, just listen.” he falls quiet and you lean back into the cushions. “i won’t be able to live knowing my brother didn’t approve. i can’t lose him, ‘nando, he’s my best friend. but…”

your lip wobbles, a tear slipping down your cheek. one you quickly wipe away, willing your emotions to get back in shape. fernando notices the shake in your breath, and his heart breaks when he realises he can’t do anything to help.

“but… the time we spent together, it was wonderful. you’ve taken my whole heart and i’ve happily let you keep it. it’s not something i want to let go of.”

“can’t we have both?” fernando asks, ready to beg you to stay. “lando will come around. and who cares about the press? we’d have each other, that’s what matters.”

“and what if it goes wrong?” you ask, almost too sharply. “what then? i can never come to a race again, because i won’t be able to face you? or we make it awkward between you and lando? he really looks up to you, fernando.”

“what could go wrong?” he asks, though he knows the answer. he knows about his own mistakes, and the reputation that came from it. but he would never dare break your heart, for it would only ruin his own.

“fernando…”

“mi amor, please…” he doesn’t care how desperate he sounds, because he is desperate. desperate to love you, to have you forever. “at least let us try.”

you consider it for a moment, you really do. torn between the possible love of your life and your baby brother, the hellish debacle of the century. but blood ran thicker than water, right?

“we never should have started this,” you brave the words, though they stab you in the process. but you know the only way to do this is to hurt him, to give him a reason to stay away. no matter how it kills you. “we can’t go on. it’s not like it ever could have worked, and you know it’s true.”

“no,” he replies firmly, holding himself together. “no, i’m not letting you go that easily.”

“i’m sorry, fernando. try and enjoy your break, okay?” you click the red end call button before he can reply, turning your phone off and sinking into the cushions, body soon racking with gentle sobs.

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lando.jpg home sweet home

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user back with the y/n content, the people’s princess 🫶🫶🫶

pierregasly y/n’s cooking 🔛🔝

carlossainz55 i want a norris family dinner rn

user Y/N’S SO CUTE

fernandoalo_official enjoy ❤️

writers note: whoopsies. this is short sorry i’m super duper busy atm 💌

#formula 1 #formula one #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 instagram au #formula 1 x reader #fernando alonso imagine #fernando alonso #fernando alonso instagram au #fernando alonso x reader #lando norris x reader #lando norris #carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #lance stroll x reader #max verstappen x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #oscar piastri x reader #mick schumacher x reader

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suzayaaa · 7 months

Text

BOYFRIEND CRITERIA - 천러

pairing: chenle x fem!reader

word count: 1.5k

theme: non-idol!chenle, angst? fluff? hmm…, suggestive if you force it to be, bestfriends to lovers

warnings: mentions of food, cursing

suza’s note: the amount of time it took me to write this is an absolute crime

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

“I’m coming over.” Chenle’s voice buzzed through your phone speaker.

“No, you’re not?” You frown at your best friend’s statement, but keep your eyes focused on the mobile game you’re playing.

“Yes, I am!”

“I won’t speak.”

“Then we’ll sit in silence. Keep the door unlocked.”

“Chenle-” Before you can tell him off, he hangs up and you throw your phone on your bed with a groan.

Chenle has been extremely stubborn about ‘helping’ you deal with your breakup. You two had become friends long before you met your now ex-boyfriend, and he saw every stage of your past relationship.

You always knew the relationship wasn’t going to be long-term. It was obvious, you two were too different to be able to handle each other. But you had fun, so you stayed. You never felt any deeper connection to your ex though—attraction was the most you could call it.

Still, cutting the strings off is always difficult, no matter who it is. Letting go of someone is a decision most people are afraid to make, but sometimes it’s inevitable. You knew you had to change something when the adrenaline wasn’t as high as usual during your dates and the makeout sessions became forgettable, yet you were too immature for that change. You ignored it, saying maybe it’s temporary or it’s just a bad day. After all, he wasn’t a bad guy, and you were scared to hurt his feelings.

You didn’t expect your ex to be the first one to break the bubble, and you didn’t expect it to affect you.

So, at first, you understood Chenle. He helped you work through your emotions and find yourself in a new, single, reality. His everyday efforts made the post-breakup depression somewhat enjoyable, and as much as you appreciate your best friend, you really wish he could leave you alone. At least for a day.

It’s been a month.

You’re all good now. You’ve moved on. The past is the past and you live in the present. You don’t need anyone to babysit you, yet Chenle still won’t leave you even for a second “in case you’re feeling bad and don’t want to tell him”.

That’s why you don’t react when you hear a series of loud knocks and the front door snaps open. You also don’t react when he yells your name so loudly that the whole building can hear, and you keep ignoring him when he appears at your bedroom door, a blush on his nose caused by the cold weather and two bags in hand.

He comes to your bed, stopping right in front of it, drops the bags on your sheets, and looks at you incredulously. “You’re seriously not gonna talk?” You keep your stare at the traffic outside the window, but see from your peripheral vision that Chenle started to unpack the bags. “I brought us snacks on the way,” he puts the snacks next to you and you can’t help but turn your head to look at them. “If you won’t talk, then eat.”

You watch him sit next to you and rest his back against the headboard, and you take a pack of your favorite cookies. You open it and start munching on a cookie in silence as Chenle plays with his phone while rambling about his day to you.

You want to talk to him, but you’re a woman of words. When you say something, you stick to it—doesn’t matter how stupid it is. Chenle is the same. You two are probably the most stubborn people on this planet, so you both always hold onto whatever comes to your mind. Yet despite your strong personality, he always finds a way to break you.

Chenle sacrifices every minute of his free time to spend it with you and to possibly make your day better. He spends his money to treat you and adjusts himself to you and your special needs.

You’re his princess, even though you tell him you can handle yourself a hundred times a day. The gap between the favors you do for each other is monumental, yet he never complains.

You rest your back against the headboard and decide to give up your principles again.

“Nevermind,” your mumble cuts his rambles and he gives you an unimpressed side-eye.

“Now you talk?”

“Don’t be rude to me. That’s my privilege.”

“Did that guy have those privileges too?” He asks, almost mockingly, not even sparing you a glance.

“What are you talking about?” You cringe at his weird behavior and put the cookie away.

“Who could I possibly be talking about? Or is there someone new?” You snap your head and glare at him as you hear him scoff.

“Chenle, what the fuck are you talking about? And why are you even mentioning him? I told you so many times! He’s my ex, I’m over him. He’s irrelevant now.”

“I don’t know.”

“But I do! Besides, he wasn’t like I want my boyfriend to be.”

“What do you want then?”

You stare at him, weirded out by the sudden change of topic, but you brush it off.

“Well…” You straighten your posture and look up. “I want someone handsome and confident. Someone honest and straightforward, a good kisser too,” you smirk at your own words. “Someone who will take care of me, a guy with a good sense of humor, and someone I have great chemistry with…” Your smile slowly fades as thoughts rush to your head, “someone who’s willing to spend their free time with me,” and your voice shrinks as you realize. “Someone… Um…”

“Someone what?” Chenle’s unreadable expression makes you want to curl up and die. You quickly try to come up with an excuse, but his stare on you leaves your mind completely blank.

“You know what, nevermind, I don’t know,” you cover your mouth with your hand and turn your head away from him. You quickly get up from your bed and try to leave the room. “Actually, I think you should go home now.”

“Why?” He gets up and walks towards you. “Because you just described me?”

You freeze. Your stare gets stuck on the floor and you gulp nervously, “Uh, what? No, I didn’t.” He scoffs again and looks at the back of your head.

“Right, there’s one thing you don’t know yet.”

He turns you around so you can face him and lifts your chin with his fingers, never breaking eye contact.

“You don’t know how I kiss.”

He puts his hand on your nape, carefully caressing your neck with his thumb. His eyes flick from yours to your lips and he’s so close you can feel his breath on your face and your heartbeat pressing to his chest. Your fingers brush against his on your chin and he intertwines your hands, pulling them down. You look at him closely, your mouth slightly open.

When your eyes meet again, nothing matters anymore. All you feel is his delicate touch, all you see is his beautiful face, all you hear is his quiet breathing. The smell of his perfume surrounds you and pulls you closer than you have ever been. He looks at your lips again. You nod your head and the butterflies in your stomach explode when your lips finally meet.

The kiss is all Chenle. The taste of the snacks you ate earlier mixes in your mouths, his warm hands calmly play with your hair and fingers as he softly bites your lip. You don’t want to ever let go, the tender touches and playful smiles make you go feral. Just as you put your free hand on his waist to pull him closer, Chenle stops and slowly moves away from you.

He looks at you and gulps. “Did I ruin us?”

Your eyes stay focused on his pink and slightly swollen lips. It’s like he put a spell on you, all you can think of is the euphoria you felt seconds ago. “No, not at all.” You wrap your arms around his neck and close the gap between you one more time.

Chenle breaks out into a smile and kisses you back, this time more confidently. His hands go to your waist and hold you tightly, your fingers find a way to lightly pull at Chenle’s locks. The kiss is more steady now, more secure. Knowing the feeling is mutual puts you both at ease, and you use this moment to the fullest, enjoying every touch. You alternate between little pecks, deep kisses, teasing smooches, and everything you can think of until you satisfy your hunger for each other.

You pull away but stay in the embrace, looking into each other’s eyes lovingly. Chenle scans the blush on your cheeks and smirks.

“So, do I fit your boyfriend criteria?”

You throw your head back with a laugh. “Yeah. 100%.”

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

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sunshinesdaydream · 3 months

Text

The Captain

Pairing: Rex x F!Reader Rating: SFW Summary: Rex meets the four year old daughter of the woman he met through Right to Love (@tcwmatchmakingau mentioned, but not part of) Warnings: None Word Count :1133 Graphic Header and Dividers by:@sunshinesdaydream (me)

Rex had let you go on about your daughter, Eryka. You had felt bad spending time on your dates going on about her. But he had encouraged it, asking about how she was doing. He remembered the things going on in her life just as he did yours.

“Mesh’la, I knew from the start you have Eryka. She’s part of your life, and since I hope to be too, I also hope to be part of hers,” he told you two weeks in.

About a month after you first met him through the Right to Love matchmaking service, you had decided that it was time for the two of them to meet.

Rather past time. The whole point in the matchmaking service was to find the right long term partner. So you asked him to meet the two of you for dinner. Unfortunately he was sent on an emergency deployment the next morning.

So you used the time he was gone to tell your four year old about Rex. Immediately it was the same thing the other way around. She had pouted when you had insisted she wait and meet him in person instead of over holocall. You also didn’t tell her that he agreed that they should wait for an in person introduction.

Now, when he was due to arrive any minute, you were just finishing her hair. “Mama? Can I call him Captain? Or do I call him Rex?”

“I think that is something you should ask him. But which would you be most okay with?” you ask.

“Captain. It's weird calling big people by their name unless I say mister first,” she answers, decisively.

“I’m sure he will think that’s absolutely fine then,” you assure her. “But you can ask to be sure,”

“Okay,” she answers. The chime sounded that he had gotten to your door and Eryka bolted out from under your hands faster than you could blink.

“Can I open it?” Her hand reaches for the panel by the door. “He is only kind of a stranger because you know him, Mama,”

“You can open the door for Rex, that’s fine,” you sigh.

With a grin she pushes the button and the door slid open. Face to face with each other they both pause. Then Rex took a knee, getting on her level.

“Hello, Eryka, it’s nice to finally meet you” he says, offering his hand.

You have to stifle a laugh when your precocious daughter responds in her best “tea party” manners. She reaches with her small hand to shake his and said, “Pleased to meet you sir, may I call you Captain?”

He gently takes her hand and shakes it. With a serious, but pleasant expression, he responds “If you would like,”

“Yes, please” She answers.

“When I was planetside on my last mission I found this in a shop. Thought you might like it,” Rex offers a white plush fathier.

With that she breaks character. Eryka’s eyes went wide and she gasps. With a bright smile, he sets the stuffed animal in her arms.

“Oh, thank you!” She squeals, hugging the toy close.

“You’re welcome,” Rex answers before getting to his feet. “And this is for your mom,” he hands you a small shimersilk pouch. Out of it tumbles a silvery charm bracelet with a crystal fathier charm.

“It’s beautiful, thank you,” you breathe as he helps you with the clasp on your wrist.

“Aren’t you going to give him a kiss, Mama? The princess in the stories gives the prince a kiss,” Eryka asks, causing both of you to freeze. This was not something that had occurred to either of you to discuss.

“Oh! You’re being shy!” She covers her face with the stuffed animal and spins around to face the other way. “‘Kay, not looking!” Her voice is muffled.

You bite your lip to prevent the giggle from escaping, and it was clear Rex was restraining his own laugh. You go up on your toes to give him a soft kiss. “Thank you, and welcome back,” you murmur.

Rex leans in and gives you a firmer, longer lasting kiss. “It’s good to be back, ner Cyare,” he answers.

Eryka clears her throat dramatically and Rex grins at you before doing the same and saying, “Right, are we ready to go?”

Over dinner the two of them ask all the questions they had asked you and more. By the time you were eating dessert he had learned everything about her preschool and she knew the names of his closest brothers and enough about boloball that she asked him to teach her.

As you made your way home Eryka was visibly wilting, swaying on her feet. You start to pick her up to carry her the rest of the way. But his hand is on your shoulder. “Allow me?” He asks.

You nod in response and he addresses Eryka. “Ad’ika, is it okay if I carry you home? You look very tired.”

She reaches up for him and he scoops her up. She immediately lays her head against him and you both thought she had passed out until she says, sleepily”Captain?”

“Yes, ad’ika?” He answers.

“What’s that word?” She mumbles.

“It means little one in mando’a, a language my brothers and I speak,” he explains.

Eryka’s head pops up immediately, clearly half asleep she says, “teach me, please?”

He laughs quietly, “of course, but another day,”

“Mmmkay,” she mumbles as she snuggled against him.

Rex then took your hand with his free one, lacing his fingers with yours, and continued back to your apartment in quiet conversation with you.

Once to your home he follows you to Eryka’s room. While you pulled a nightgown out of the drawer for her he laid her gently on her bed, cradling her head as if she was a newborn, and took her shoes off of her. When you pull her dress off he has her nightgown ready to go on over her head, disturbing her as little as possible. He waits next to you as you cover her with her blanket and quietly follows you out of the room.

When you both are away from the door to her room he pulls you into a tight embrace, pressing his face to your neck. You pull back just enough to capture his lips and give him a proper welcome home kiss.

“Will you stay tonight?” you ask him.

“Can’t, have a post mission inspection tomorrow morning,” he strokes your cheek while he answers. “If you both want to meet me in the park tomorrow afternoon,”

“We can make dinner after,” you continue, smiling up at him. “Maybe you can stay then?”

Cradling your face in his hands, he gives you a gentle kiss, “Sounds like a good plan,”

Thanks for reading!

☀️Love & Wrecker Hugs☀️

Sunshine

Taglist:@sleepycreativewriter @523rdrebel @cloneloverrrrr @trappedinlimbo15 @merkitty49 @cdblake1565 @littlemissmanga @skywlker-sluvtt @the-bad-batch-baroness @padawancat97 @clonemedickix@dystopicjumpsuit@moonlightwarriorqueen@idontgetanysleep@littlemissmanga@starrylothcat@sinfulsalutations@anxiouspineapple99@clonemedickix@multi-fan-dom-madness@wolffegirlsunite@sev-on-kamino@dickarchivist@secondaryrealm @wings-and-beskar @captain-rexs-cyare @cw80831

#sunshine writes #mission: buir #star wars #the clone wars #clone wars #star wars the clone wars #captain rex #clone captain rex #star wars clone wars #rex x reader #captain rex x reader #dad!clones

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tightjeansjavi · 2 months

Text

trinkets

A/N: so I woke up this morning thinking about Dieter & gumdrop—better known as trash panda and trash possum 🥺 I just love how silly they are together and I hope y’all do too!

~word count: 1.9k~ yeah—idk what happened lol

Summary: Dieter almost burns his script in front of the director, you’re at home writing Din Djarin fanfiction on your tumblr account, Oh! And something about Dieter cloning his cock in silicone?

Pairing | dieter bravo x f!reader

Warnings: none, fluff, implied smut (phone sex bby), language, dirty talk, dieter and the reader being a menace together, one mention of drugs, readers nickname is gumdrop/trash possum, reader has no physical descriptions, +18 minors dni!

series masterlist

When Dieter is away for a new filming project, you end up house sitting for him because there is no one that he trusts more, (outside of his agent) than you, his gumdrop. Plus, he’s secretly hoping that if you spend more time in his home, that you’ll be open to moving in with him. It’s his genius plan that he of course came up with when he was stoned out of his mind.

He didn’t realize that he could just ask you to move in with him. That was far too simple!

So, for the month that Dieter was away filming, you were lounging in his home like a house cat. He called you multiple times a day to check in on you, and because he missed your voice terribly.

“What have you been up to today, gumdrop?” He was hunched over the side of his hotel bed at an awkward angle. It was a terrible day on set. He was used to the director making last minute changes to the scene, tweaking irrelevant details and minor character traits that no one would pay attention to. Dieter, however, was not prepared for his character's redemption arc to be completely fried to bits.

He compared it to what happens to an egg when you crack it on a pan that is too hot, and the whole thing ends up burnt and crusted onto the pan.

He was furious, and instead of just sticking it through, he stormed off set after he threatened to quit the film entirely.

“Hey, Dee!” You chirped enthusiastically through the receiver. “I’m out by the pool, with a fresh glass of homemade iced tea, and I’m finally getting to write the bit where my slow burn lovers are finally going to kiss!”

He felt his lips curving upwards into a lopsided smile at your enthusiasm as he pictured you in your sunglasses, typing away on your laptop, eyes dancing, little giggles slipping past your lips because he knew just how badly you wanted to write this next part.

“I miss you so fucking much, my little trash possum.” He sighed, scraping his hand down his face before he fell back against the comforter. “This is about that tin helmet dude, right? With the little green guy?”

“Oh, Diets, I miss you too, trash panda.” You paused your typing, reaching for your glass of iced tea and took a sip. “Yes, baby. Din Djarin and Grogu. Speaking of, when you come home next month, do you wanna go to Disneyland?”

“Are Din and the reader finally gonna kiss? Shit, is he gonna take his helmet off and break the creed? Please tell me he takes the helmet off!” He felt like one of your fellow dedicated readers on tumblr, anticipating when you would post the next chapter to one of your many prolific series. “Baby, I would absolutely love to go to Disneyland with you when I get home.”

You giggled softly, shaking your head and set your glass back down on the nearby table. “Dee, I can’t spoil it! You know this, baby. You’re just gonna have to wait for the update like everyone else.” You typed in a few more words to add to the current sentence you were working on before saying, “how’s filming going? Shouldn’t you be on set right now, baby?”

“Well, if I were the tin helmet man, I would absolutely take my helmet off and break my creed for you, Meshla. And then after that I would—” he grumbled and rolled over onto his stomach, “I left set because this fucking director is completely trashing the redemption arc that my character is supposed to have! I had all these cool ideas that pretty much have now just been flushed down the toilet, and I may, or may not have threatened to quit.”

“How romantic, Dee. You’d break your creed for me?” Your lips curved downwards into a set frown when he explained to you what happened on set. “Oh, Dieter, I’m so sorry. Why the hell would the director do that? It sounded like before that it was going really well, too.”

“I’d break every creed for you, gumdrop. But yeah, the guy is on fucking crack, I swear. It’s making my job so much more fucking difficult. Y’know, I thought that after winning my first Oscar that people in this bloodsucking industry would actually take me seriously. Guess not, huh? Guess I’m still just a fuckin’ joke in Hollywood’s eyes.” He scoffed, pinching the bridge of his nose with his ringed thumb and forefinger to suppress his oncoming tears.

“Baby, you are not a joke in Hollywood’s eyes, okay? If you and the director aren’t seeing eye to eye, I think you should give it one last shot to try and meet a middle ground? If he doesn’t budge, then I fully support you in quitting this job. You’re so passionate about your work, Dee. No reason to be pulling teeth just for a paycheck.” You reassured him, setting your laptop off to the side now so you could give your boyfriend your undivided full attention.

“And this is why I fucking love you, gumdrop. You always know how to validate me and talk me down. What the fuck would I do without you?” He stifled a chuckle. “So, I think I’m gonna give myself another hour to be pissed and grouchy about this, and then I’m gonna march my ass back to set, and give this dude a piece of my fucking—”

“Dieter.” You softly warned him.

“Baby, I’m kidding. But I am gonna try and see if he and I can reach a middle ground. And if we can’t, well, guess I’m coming home early, trash possum.”

“As much as I would love to see you sooner, I want this role to work out for you, Dee.”

“Me too, gumdrop.” He scratched at his beard with a sigh, and just when he was about to say more, there was a knock at his door and the familiar chime of his agent's voice. “I’ll call you later, okay? Cause I wanna hear all about the tin man kissing the reader, finally.”

“Okay, baby. Just remember, you’re my Dieter Bravo, and I’m so proud of you.”

“Love you to the moon and back, trash possum. Catcha on the flipside.” He ended the call, tossing his phone to the side and droned out, “You may enter.”

Later in the evening, and you were finalizing the final draft of the chapter, Dieter texted you and told you that the conversation with the director went well, and things were back on track.

Dee! This is great news, baby! I’m so happy for you 💗

Me too! He actually agreed that destroying my character's redemption arc was piss-poor writing, and he’s gonna have a new script ready for me in the morning. Did Din finally kiss the reader?

See what happens when you just communicate? So proud of you, baby. And maaaaybe. I just finished finalizing the chapter and now I just have to post it! 🤭

See, now if I never met you, I probably would have torn the guy a new one and then set the script on fire right in front of him. Y’know, like that scene in the Social Network, where Andrew Garfield’s gf sets the scarf on fire in his trash can? CLASSIC! Anyway, I’m gripping the edge of my seat! I can’t wait to read, gumdrop.

Ohhh! Yeah, that scene is a classic! I’m glad that you didn’t set your script on fire, Dee. I should have the chapter posted within the hour. Oh! And before I forget, when you come home next month…I have a surprise for you x.

Shiiii is it you naked in my bed and touching yourself? Is that the surprise? 🥵

Well that’s part of it! Butttt you’ll just have to wait and see! 😉

Oh, sure, tease me, why don’t ya? Got my cock stupid hard already, you little filthy thing.

Pics or it didn’t happen!

Tell me if Din and the reader kiss, then I’ll send you a pic ;)

You are a little shithead

Tell me something I don’t already know, gumdrop 🥰

Fine. Fine. They kiss! He takes his helmet off, but she doesn’t see his face. She keeps her eyes closed because she doesn’t want him to break his creed for her 🥺

Damn, that just made my heart & my cock ache :( Din is such a romantic! Be still, my foolish heart. Your readers are gonna eat that shit up, babygirl.

Please show me. That clone your willy dildo you got me just isn’t the same. And yeah, he is such a romantic! Just like you ��

Oh, fuck. Are you using it on yourself right now? Hold on, I’m gonna FaceTime you! I need to see this for myself 😉

I miiight be.

Seconds after sending that text, Dieter FaceTimes you and his freehand is already slowly and gently fisting his cock in your view just as he sees you fucking yourself with the silicone dildo of his cloned cock.

“So pretty, good golly. You take my fake cock so well, gumdrop.”

It’s hours before Dieter’s flight into LAX is expected to arrive. You had just finished moving in all of your belongings from your apartment, including all of your silly little trinkets and knick knacks that you have now displayed on every available surface in his home.

Tiny animal figurines, built lego sets, little trinkets and bobbles and you even went and bought a cabinet to store yours and Dieter’s Funko Pop collection. Little pieces of yourself and your exuberant personality were scattered about the house. You were, in some ways, like a crow; you loved to collect pretty and shiny things.

When Dieter arrived home, bag slung over his shoulder, and under his eyes, the first thing he noticed was the stack of cardboard boxes neatly stacked next to the front door and his heart immediately swelled at the sight.

“Gumdrop?” He called for you, kicking his shoes off on the rainbow doormat next to yours.

He padded further into the house, stopping at the cabinet with your shared Funko Pop collection and into the kitchen where he saw that along the window sill, you had an array of different animal figurines lined up in a row, and the very first two animals were a little ceramic racoon and possum.Then he finally saw you, lounged out by the pool, typing away like a maniac on your laptop.

He dropped his bag to the floor and pulled open the sliding back door to accompany you outside.

You looked up from the screen at the familiar sound, lips curving upwards into a grin that stretched across your entire face. “Dieter!” You said enthusiastically, setting your laptop off to the side and ran over to him, nearly slipping into the pool on your way because you were so excited.

He met you halfway, wrapping his arms around you and hugging you so tightly it felt like the oxygen was being crushed out of your lungs.

“Hey there, my little crow. You moving in or something?” He said teasingly, loosening his grip around you as your arms looped around his neck, “Cause, I was gonna ask you to move in at some point but I just—”

You shushed him with a kiss, molding your lips against his in a warm embrace. “Surprise.” You carded your fingers through his hair, tugging him in closer, “You’re stuck with me now, trash panda.”

He smiled against your lips, kissing you back deeply, giving your ass a playful squeeze as you yelped in surprise, giving him full access to lick into your mouth, “Wouldn’t’ want to have it any other way, trash possum.”

banners made by the lovely @saradika-graphics 💗

please follow @tightjeansjaviupdates for fic updates and notifications

#fic:trinkets #dieter bravo #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo fic #dieter bravo the bubble #dieter bravo x f!reader #dieter bravo x female reader #dieter bravo x you #dieter bravo x reader #dieter x reader #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo fluff #the bubble fanfiction #the bubble fic #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction

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neonghostlights · 4 months

Text

A/N: actually there’s one more chapter after this one. Enjoy the sadness!

Warnings: Death (reader is a ghost), loneliness, Goodbyes (18+, minors DNI)

Series masterlist

The Shortcut Chapter Four: The Goodbye

A lot had happened in the year since he first saw you.

It had been a long time since you had told him how you had died and it seems since that night your relationship had grown.

It was nearing fall again, the air still holding warmth in it as he snuck into the graveyard.

Eddie had a secret building inside him, threatening to spew out the moment he saw you waiting for him.

You gave him a soft smile. He could tell you were relieved to see him too. It was like he couldn’t breathe until he was at this graveyard. He had found himself visiting a lot more during the days between his visit.

He would whisper to your headstone like a madman while the sun was out on those occasions where he needed to talk to you but the moon wasn’t full yet. Even though he couldn’t see you he could feel you haunting him.

“What’s on your mind?” You had seen through him like you always did.

He hadn’t been there long, only a few minutes. He had brought a book to read to you. You enjoyed hearing the stories he liked, hearing his thoughts and poems. It was like you were the only one who listened anymore.

Eddie stared off across the dark grave yard. It was a sight that once creeped him out but now it reminded him of you.

He would miss it so much.

“I have something to tell you,” he started. He had thought over and over how he would tell you the news since he found out a week ago.

“What’s going on?”

“I got a new job.”

“That’s great news!” You cheered, beaming at him. “I knew you had been looking for a while! That is so exciting!”

Your smile dropped as you watched Eddie frown.

It was true he has been searching for a real job for a long time. No one in town would hire him. But it seemed he finally caught the break he needed.

“The job is out on the west coast. A trucking company.”

You let out a small oh, knowing what this would mean.

“I can still try to visit when I’m off. Maybe I could even try to line my days off up with the full moon and I can make the trip out here as much as possible,” Eddie listed off the ideas he had, how you two could make this work.

You just shook your head, still smiling, still happy for him.

“We both knew this wouldn’t last forever,” you said softly.

“I can make this work,” Eddie said, determined not to lose the only light in his life.

He needed this job to survive, to have something for once in his life. Wayne’s back was bad and he couldn’t work as much anymore. He needed to be able to support the man that had supported him for so long.

Eddie would never mention this out loud, but it felt like he had finally met his soulmate. He didn’t realizing growing up meant having to make sacrifices as large as these.

“I think it’s time for you to move on. You’re alive, Eddie. It’s so wonderful to have a beating heart that is so full of hope and love. You can’t spend forever talking to lonely old ghosts in a graveyard.”

“I’m not ready to say goodbye,” Eddie told you, feeling the pressure build in his eyes. “What’s going to happen with you? Are you just going to move on?”

He was losing you.

“Then this isn’t goodbye. I have a funny feeling I’ll see you again someday, Eddie Munson. But hopefully it’ll be a very, very long time,” you whispered the last part like it was a secret. “I don’t think I could truly move on even if I wanted to. Promise me you’ll only come back if you’re unhappy. But please, still try to be happy.”

Eddie let out a sad noise that was between a laugh and a cry. “I promise.”

“Thank you for visiting me,” you whispered as you leaned in and attempted to press a kiss to Eddie’s cheek. He felt nothing but cold air breeze past his skin but it was still the more precious moment to him in his whole life. He closed his eyes, savoring the chill.

When he opened them again you were gone.

#eddie munson angst #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson au #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x you #eddie stranger things #eddie munson series #eddie munson x ghost reader #eddie munson x ghost

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nanichi0 · 1 year

Text

First Time

Fandom/Character: JJK/Choso Kamo

Pairing: Choso x gn!reader

Rating: NSFW, 18+

WC: 2.7k (oneshot)

Content Warnings: fluff and smut, gn!reader (reader’s pronouns aren’t mentioned), domestic au I guess, established relationship, pet names (angel, beautiful, my love, baby), needy!Choso, inexperienced!Choso, virgin!Choso, oral sex (blowjob), throat fucking, lots of kissing, hair pulling, reader is more dominant, sexual teasing, praise, I think that’s everything?

Crossposted on AO3, please leave comments/kudos if you liked it 💖

Synopsis: An inexperienced Choso gets head for the first time <3

Yesterday had been your typical Friday night. Choso had come over, you’d ordered food, and you’d put on a movie. This was one of the ways you liked to spend time with each other, snuggled up on your living room couch. Choso always wanted to be respectful of your time and would usually head out by midnight, saying his goodbye with a peck on your lips and a warm smile.

Yesterday had been your typical Friday night, until it was time for him to go home.

Choso was relatively new to physical affection, so you usually took things slow– a few weeks into your relationship and the most you’d done was a simple kiss, but you didn’t mind as long as he was comfortable. This is why it took you by surprise when his lips had lingered over yours after he said his goodnight, when he had gone back in for a deeper kiss, when you had brushed your tongue past his lower lip and he had let out a soft moan, when you had felt his arms snake around your waist and his hands grip at your sides. Warmth had spread through your whole body. You’d pulled him back toward your room, slipping your own hands under his shirt, wanting more, when he’d suddenly stopped, his breathing heavy and his face flushed. “I- I’m sorry. It’s getting late, I should go,” the words had tumbled from his mouth as he’d hurriedly walked out the door. You had stood there for a few minutes, stunned. Once you had snapped out of it, you sent him a text.

Are you okay? I’m sorry I pulled you back like that, I got carried away and didn’t ask if you were comfortable with it.

He had answered a few moments later.

I’m okay! Don’t worry about it, I’ll see you in the morning :)

And there he was today, teetering back and forth at the entrance to your apartment. It wasn’t very often that you witnessed Choso acting so nervous.

You sighed. “You don’t have to come in if you don’t feel comfortable–“

“It’s not that,” he interjected. “It’s just, last night…” Blush crept up onto his face as he glanced down. “I thought you wanted to go further than kissing and I freaked out.” He looked back up at you. “Not that I don’t want to! I’d love to, I just…I got nervous that I would mess something up, or that I’d do a bad job, or that you wouldn’t like it, or-“

You reached out and held his hand, giving it a squeeze. “Choso, I know you’re not used to this, and it’s okay to mess up. But don’t worry about me for now.” You smiled at him. “I think it might help if we focus on you first,” you said. You gestured towards your bedroom. “Come with me?”

Choso nodded. His large hand still held in yours, he followed you into your apartment and then your room. You closed the door behind you and Choso looked at you. “So…w-what should I do?” he asked. You noticed he was still a little shaky.

You gave his hand another reassuring squeeze before you lifted one of your hands to his head, gently brushed some hair out of his face, and tucked it behind his ear. You slowly traced the black line on the bridge of his nose. “Let’s get you to relax a bit first, okay?” Your hand was on his cheek now as your thumb stroked soothing circles on his skin.

Choso agreed and leaned his head into your touch. You could tell he was already significantly calmer than before. His breathing was back to normal, his posture no longer stiff. His eyes were closed, and a small but sweet smile adorned his face.

With your hand still cupped on his cheek, you leaned in slowly and gave him a soft kiss. You nudged your nose against his. “I love you,” you whispered.

He rested his forehead against yours. “I love you too, angel,” he whispered back.

You kissed him again.

And again.

Slow kisses turned faster, needier, more intense. Choso reciprocated, eagerly pressing his mouth deeper onto yours each time. His hands settled on your hips, holding you in place as though he was scared you would fly off at any second. You nipped at his bottom lip, and he opened his mouth more, allowing you to slip your tongue inside.

Choso’s back was now flush to the door. Your right hand was in his hair, which was free of its usual twin tails, and you raked your nails on his scalp as your tongues danced around each other. Choso was getting more comfortable now, occasionally biting your bottom lip the same way you’d done to him. You pulled away and Choso groaned in protest at the brief loss of contact. So needy already, and you were just getting started. You tugged on his hair, eliciting a moan as you tilted his head to the side and left a trail of sloppy kisses down his jaw. Choso’s grip on your hips tightened every time you licked or left love bites on his neck. Airy, whiny sounds escaped him, music to your ears.

You moved your hands to the hem of his shirt and pulled on it. Choso understood what you wanted and helped you lift it off. This was your first time seeing him like this. Broad shoulders, toned muscles, slim waist– were he made of marble he would belong in a museum. You could hardly contain yourself as your eyes trailed down his torso, seeing his v-line, his stomach, and the trail of dark hair that led down from his navel and disappeared under his sweats.

You kissed his cheek. “Can you sit on the bed for me?”

Choso obliged. Once there, you gently pushed him back until his head was resting on your pillows. You straddled Choso’s thighs and glanced up at his face. Choso stared at you sweetly, expectantly, while he rested his hands on your own thighs. It’s kind of crazy, you thought. How can someone look so cute and vulnerable but so hot at the same time?

Your hands explored his body, tracing his scars and the ridges and curves of his muscles. You could feel his pulse quickening from every light touch, even more so when your fingers dragged along his happy trail, getting closer and closer to his groin. You leaned over him, your lips meeting each other’s once again.

“You’re doing so well, my love,” you said. The praise made Choso blush and you felt him smile as you continued to kiss him. You started working your way back down his neck, his chest, his abs, his stomach, his hips, adorning him with hickeys.

“Talk to me, baby,” you cooed. “How do you feel?” You had moved on further, leaving slow, wet kisses right along his waistband.

“G-good,” he said, his voice breaking when you licked a stripe up to his hipbone. “Really good,” he panted.

His erection was glaringly obvious, and a small patch of precum had been soaking through his sweatpants.

“I can tell,” you said with a grin growing on your face as you lightly touched his clothed length, circling that little wet spot with your finger. You pulled back, scanning his face to make sure he was okay with you doing this. Choso’s chest rose and fell heavily. His eyes were dark and half-lidded in a lustful state, but he was staring at you intently, his lips parted, silently egging you on.

“Can I?” you asked, glancing down at your hand.

“Please,” he breathed.

You shifted yourself off of his thighs. You grabbed his waistband and pulled down his pants. The sight of his length straining against his underwear made you swallow. Your eyes met Choso’s as you placed a kiss on his right upper thigh, and then the left. His cock jumped at the contact, as though it were calling out for you to come closer. In a painstakingly slow motion, you slid his underwear off, too, and you watched his dick spring free. Your mouth was agape and you swear you stopped breathing for a minute.

“Holy shit,” you murmured.

Choso had a pretty cock, there was no other way to say it. It was thick, the perfect length, with a slight upward curve that you just knew would feel heavenly inside you. He was uncut and veiny, and soft tufts of hair framed its base. The very tip of his cock was peeking out, darker than the rest of his skin, glossy and sticky from his precum. You hadn’t noticed how long you’d been entranced by it until Choso called your name. You snapped your eyes back up to his.

“Is it…is everything okay?” Choso asked, his brows slightly furrowed.

You slid your hand up his thigh, giving him a little squeeze. “More than ‘okay,’ Choso, you’re fucking perfect,” you said with a smile. Choso felt warmth spread to his cheeks again as he returned the smile.

You positioned yourself in between his legs and Choso held his breath in anticipation of your next move. But instead he felt your lips go up his right thigh, and then the left thigh. You alternated between the two, moving onto his groin, Choso’s cock twitching every time your hot breath fanned over him. You inched closer…closer…closer, but right when Choso thought you were about to finally touch him there, you pulled away and went back to his thighs. Choso pouted, but what you were doing felt good, and he didn’t want to seem ungrateful, so he didn’t say anything. You followed this sequence a few more times and Choso grew needier by the second, breathy whimpers filling your ears the more you continued your ministrations. You were touching and kissing everywhere but his dick, and he was getting frustrated. Why weren’t you touching it? Couldn’t you see how much he needed it? Couldn’t you see what a mess you were making of him, how much precum was streaming down his length onto the hair below?

Choso opened his mouth in protest and you raised an eyebrow at him, a playful look on your face. You almost felt guilty when you saw how his eyes watered. Choso spoke before you could say anything.

“Baby, please,” he begged, “S-stop teasing me…”

You put on your best innocent expression. “Aw, are you tired of my kisses already?”

“Co- come on, you know what I mean, just touch me already, angel, please. Please let me feel your mouth on m…on my cock.” God, he was so cute like this. So hot when he told you exactly what he wanted.

“Someone’s a little desperate, isn’t he?” you asked, and you don’t think you’d ever seen Choso look as flustered as he did in that moment.

He started to apologize, sweet as always. “I’m- I’m sorry, what you’re doing feels so good, baby, I promise, I just-“

“Shhh, it’s okay, Choso. I know. I was just giving you a hard time, but you’ve been such a good boy for me, I think you’ve earned a little reward.” You pressed your cheek into his thigh, your non-dominant hand going up to massage his hip. You reached your other hand out, finally grabbing Choso’s dick. Choso closed his eyes, his breath halting when you ran your thumb up the underside of it and pulled down his foreskin. Using his precum as lube, you started to work your hand up and down his length in a slow but steady rhythm.

“Fuck,” he moaned softly, followed by a whispered “Thank you, beautiful.”

Choso looked divine as he twitched under your grasp. His hands grabbed at your bedsheets, his hair was splayed out over your pillows, his body was littered with hickeys, and his eyes looked at you with love, adoration, desire.

You partly unwrapped your hand from him and licked up his shaft, paying extra attention to the frenulum before enveloping the entire head of his cock in your mouth. Choso cried out your name, his body jerking forward, one of his hands flying up to grip your shoulder. You tasted the mild saltiness of his precum as you sucked and licked him clean— not that the “cleanliness” would last long, since you proceeded to spit on him before continuing. You gathered your spit, placed your hand around the base of his cock, and began to bob your head up and down while you jerked him off with a circular motion of your wrist, your hand and head in sync. Choso was seeing stars. He was so sensitive, and your mouth felt so warm around him, and every movement of your hand and your lips as they brushed over his veins sent wave after wave of pleasure coursing through his body. He was melting under your touch, singing you a song of moans and curses that encouraged you to continue. You cupped his balls with your other hand and gave them a squeeze. They felt heavy and full and you couldn’t wait to help him drain them. You continued to move your hand up and down on his dick while you lowered your head, taking each of his balls into your mouth to suck on.

“That f-feels so good.” Choso felt the tension in his pelvis growing as you returned to giving him a blowjob. “Can…can I fuck your mouth? Please?”

The question caught you by surprise, given how uncertain he’d been about things when you’d started, but his straightforwardness was hot. Truthfully, you’d let Choso use you however he wanted. You kissed the tip of his cock, your eyes meeting his. Now it was your turn- “Yes, my love. Please do.”

You helped him stand up from the bed and you got on your knees in front of him. Choso placed his hands on your head, bringing your open mouth back to him slowly at first. He bottomed out before slowly pulling back, feeling your lips drag along his cock.

“Ahh, fuck- is that okay, angel? Tell me if you want me to stop.”

“Go ahead, Choso. Don’t hold back for me.”

And then he did as promised. He bucked his hips forward, faster and faster and faster until he set his own pace, his hands gripping onto your hair. You felt him hitting your throat, causing you to gag, but you didn’t care. He was making a mess of you - tears streaming down your face, drool smearing around your mouth and running down your chin, hair tousled and sticking up all over the place - and even still, he thought you were the most beautiful thing in the world.

“You feel so good, baby. So - shit - so fucking pretty…gagging on my cock.” His face was crimson, as if he couldn’t believe the words coming out of his own mouth. His thrusts became sporadic. “Fuck, angel, I’m getting so close!” An overwhelming warmth came over him and his muscles started to contract. His grip on your hair tightened as he pulled you as close as possible. “I ca- oh fuckfuckfuck, I’m cumming!” he gasped and threw his head back, his eyes screwed shut. You felt him twitch in your mouth, ropes of hot cum shooting down your throat, overflowing and dribbling down the corners of your mouth. His body shuddered in the aftershock of his orgasm. You swallowed as much of his release as you could, then cleaned him off, sucking and licking and kissing all over his sensitive cock. He whined from the overstimulation, a fucked out look on his face. You finally released him from your mouth with a pop, and he flopped back down on your bed, completely spent. You laid down next to him and rolled onto your side to kiss his forehead.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” you nudged him playfully.

“That…was amazing,” Choso said. He reached out to wipe your tears off. “Thank you, angel. Sorry if I got too rough. I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

“Don’t worry, I thought it was hot,” you admitted. You were suddenly very aware of the mess in your bottoms from your own arousal. “Speaking of which…we should probably go get cleaned up.”

Choso looked at you, the corners of his mouth turning up into a smile. “Let me return the favor first?”

Well, if he’s offering, there’s no way you’d pass that up.

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