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amnignsity · 7 days

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Mistakes from the past?

Yang Jeongin x F!Reader

Kinda Oblivious Yang Jeongin x Female reader.

Contains : Angst, Slight fluff >if you squint<, Hurt/NoComfort, Oblivious, jealousy - Metaphorish words.

╰┈➤ He smiled at her.

Jeongin lets out a laugh as he looks at her, gently grazing his fingers over her cheeks as he tugs a piece of her hair behind her ear. You slightly gulped - sipping on your juice box as you smiled along with them.

"Thank you for tagging me alone, jeongin..." She said as you all walked together - your hands placed over your hoodies pocket. You walked beside jeongin over the side walk as you looked at the ground seemingly thinking at the moment - not like they'd notice anyway.

Jeongin chuckled - he was in between you and her always in the middle. His hands dangling against his side as your arm brushed against his but his fingers graze against hers gently twitching against contact as he smiled at her fondly while she returned the gesture.

"It's nothing really I just decided why not tag you along after you were free..." He says sheepishly a bit shy reaching behind his ear as he gently scratched his neck - you glanced over at their side but your eyes always remain at jeongin the most. Noticing how reddish his ears were and how soft spoke he became.

Seoji grinned looking at jeongin as she reaches up and ruffles his hair - the three of you came to a stop as it was already her stop, jeongin gulped slightly looking down at her figure while Seoji smiled looking up at him.

And you? You were just there standing watching as he looked at her with a flustered expression although seoji was oblivious to this as she pulls away - jeongin's hand slightly twitched, your eyes darted how it slightly tried reaching out like he didn't want her to go just yet.

"Also thank you..for allowing me to join you guys! You're really a great company as jeongin says." Seoji looks at you with a shy smile while you looked at her and nod - you rarely spoke during the whole thing but you noticed how she'd always try to make conversations but you were just nonchalant at best since you didn't know what to say next. But you still did respond back.

"It's nothing as innie says...The more the merrier." You looked at her with the same nonchalant expression while she smiled her eyes brighten at your words. She bid goodbye as she went inside - you glanced at jeongin as he smiled dumbstruck.

"You look high." You said bluntly - ignoring the weird aching in your chest as you looked at him confused, he chuckled as you noticed the redness over his cheeks as you reached up and tried to graze your fingertips against his skin but he flinched and pulled away still smiling though.

"Shut it I don't...I'm just happy...that's all." Your hands slightly twitched at his response before nodding as you pulled away - you guys walked, the space in between was suffocating as you placed your hands back in your pockets.

Ignoring the pang over your heart whilst he talk and talk on about how great it was inviting her and that you guys should do it again sometimes. But wasn't this only our thing?

You slightly gulped as you sighed - jeongin noticing the darken and tired look on your face slowly stopped his rambles as his brows furrowed, a weird feeling rise over his chest seeing your emptied eyes usually brighten at the end of your hang-outs.

"You okay?...You don't seem like yourself..." Jeongin asked confused as you just gave him a tired smile although he noticed how it didn't reach against your eyes as you looked at him with a tired expression. Jeongin slightly gulps as he curls his hands into a fist fighting the urge to caress those soft cheeks like he always used to do - his eyes darting your lips as you both stopped under a lampstand over the streets.

"I'm fine, innie...I'm just tired you know.." Jeongin looks down at you as his glistening eyes slightly dimmed at your words - tired...that's what you always say...I know the way you look at me whenever I'm with her. He thought as you looked up at him with a pained expression, those smiles painted with sadness and those words painted with lies.

"O-okay...i believe you.." You sighed deeply - your eyes slightly glistening and glossy against the light reflecting by the dim lampstand. Jeongin gulps as he placed his hands over his pockets, hands balled into a fists as he bits his lower lip deciding to look away as you both continued walking.

"Are you happy, jeongin?" You asked with a smile over your lips while you look at the ground deciding to focus at front - jeongin could feel his breath hitched at your question, lies popping up his mind as his gaze flutters against your face, licking his lips as he gulped letting the silence take over for a moment before speaking.

"Yea...I guess I am..Are you?" He answered deciding to say the truth - as you let out a pained chuckle in response - slightly shivering against the cold as you sighed deeply looking at the ground with glossy eyes while biting your inner cheek feeling a lump over your throat.

"If you are...then I guess I am as well." You slowly looked up and meet his gaze with a smile despite the frown over your face - he felt as if time stopped for a brief moment as his breath was taken away. Although in a daze until you looked away and began walking away as he snaps out of it and quickly followed you.

"H-hey! Don't leave me!" He whined while you chuckled as you let a few tears drip down despite the smile over your lips trying to hide it from jeongin as you walked faster putting on a playful facade but jeongin could see those droplets of water as you began sprinting.

"You can't catch me, innie!" His breath hitched as his arms moved forward trying to reach you while he puts on a smile over his lips - panting as he tried to catch you while he laughed, whining louding as you both run on the dark and dim streets only the lampstands placed over the side walks being your light as the snow falls gently over the sky.

"Oh I definitely will! I always catch you and you know that!" He shouted as he smiled - ignoring the pang over his heart as he glances down seeing dark spots clearly from tears as you continued sprinting away from him.

"Well this time you won't be able too!" You shouted back as you let out giggles and laughs dodging every person as you smile saying 'excuse me's and 'Coming through's - here and there.

"Says who?!" Jeongin screamed back laughing as he got closer and closer - his eyes shining as his fingertips finally graze upon your clothes as he gulped, it seemed like fate was playing games with him as another arms catch you instead.

"Says me!-...o-oh!" You shouted back before suddenly bumping against someone you didn't see - their arms quickly wrapping around your waist as they catch you before you fall.

"W-woah there, miss!...Are you okay?" Jeongin slowly stopped his tracks as his eyes widen - looking at you very worriedly before his eyes glanced at your waist with another's arm around it as it made his heart clenched unknowingly feeling a unknown emotion erupt inside of him. You slightly gulped as you looked up at the person making you eyes widen at the sight.

Just as about jeongin was go near he felt his heart ache as he looked at your expression - eyes widen and shining, your hands over the stranger chest as you softly panted. Your eyes locking with someone else with a soften gaze and clearly lovestruck expression. He didn't like that. No. That was only for him. Right?...

༝༚༝༚

Summary : Jeongin knows reader's feelings for him but he doesn't know his cause he thinks he likes someone else.

Author's note: ¦] How are y'all? currently in a deep creative block lol. This could either be a part 1 or just a one-shot depends actually.

Sorry for the wrong grammars you'll see - English is not my native language.

ᯓᡣ𐭩Mxlist°

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rudemaidenswrite · 2 years

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Don't Belong Here

Part 4

By: @pusantheamazonian

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Tag list: @athenaricham-loves-orcs @pandainfinitely @rosecat5

"Charlie we got a problem." Olivia whispers once Charlie gets home.

"What is it?" Confused, Charlie sets her bag on the table. Olivia points at you. Quietly staring at the wall in silence.

"You okay Y/N?" Olivia asks, sitting beside you. Charlie is sitting on the other side.

"Something bad is gonna happen. I know it." Uneasy, you can't really explain it.

"Did something happen with Ronnie?" Charlie probes.

"I don't know anymore." Sighing you slouch into the couch.

"What do you mean?" Charlie reiterates, her HR skills kicking.

"I go to the party and end up talking to Ronnie the whole night. Exchange numbers and continue talking. He even gave me a nickname. Unfortunate circumstances and he's at work helping to identify a body. In a fit of anger and emotions, he basically jumped me after work. Days later after no contact he comes over to apologize. Gives a weak ass apology but I accept it anyways. It's an appropriate reaction to your friend suddenly dying to have untamed emotions. But our relationship is rocky cause I'm still offended from the bruise he left. Co-workers are still pissed. Today he picked me up because they needed medical expertise but couldn't go to a hospital. So I'm fixing a couple guys up; obviously the other dudes are dead. Dorghu comes in and wants to speak privately with me. He thanks me for helping out. Which is odd. He questions why I speak Orc and then gives his permission for me to be with Ronnie or anyone in the clan. Where the hell does he get the idea that Ronnie and I are even dating? We’re not even official. Ronnie then asks what Dorghu wanted so I tell him. I also told him how my wrist broke. Which made Ronnie angry. After talking with Dorghu I've started questioning my feelings about Ronnie. There's too many variables that suggest he's just playing me because he was ordered to. So I've been staring at the wall, rethinking my entire life." Not breathing you summarize everything.

Olivia and Charlie are stunned. It's a few minutes before anyone speaks.

"That's a lot more complicated than I thought it would be." Charlie finally comments.

"You must like him cause you two were obviously digging on each other. Right up the friend incident." Olivia states.

"But being so involved already. They're going to force me to be part of them no matter what." Massaging your temples this weird situation keeps getting weirder.

"Ooooh! Well, pick a cute one." Charlie abandons the situation like she has the last seat on the rescue boats from the Titanic.

"What do Mam and Pap think about Ronnie?" Olivia interjects.

"Only Pap knows about him and that's because he was there when Ronnie came to work. Besides Pap's on the fence." Another sigh and you throw a blanket over your head to hide.

“That's not bad but it's not good either.” Unsure Olivia pats your head.

“You haven’t told Mam about Ronnie? May Luthic help your soul.” Stunned Charlie can't believe you haven't told Mam. Mam is going to rip you a new one when she finds out.

“I know, I'm gonna need it.”

Those weird thoughts keep popping into his head and have not left. Why did Dorghu want to privately talk to you? He could have told him what he wanted to know. Unless there's more that you're not saying.

It clicks. Something else happened with that boy. There's something else fueling your spite. Something bad. It’s starting to make sense. Why you're so quiet. Why you can fight. The ability to speak the language. Hell he bruised the same wrist. He probably gave PTSD flashbacks. And left you alone for the rest of the day.

Shit.

You're probably not sleeping. Probably staring off into space. He has to find you. He needs to be on the same page.

Putting his truck in park he watches you come out of your apartment complex and walk across the parking lot, down into an alley. Confused, that's weird behavior coming from you. As he follows you down the alley he watches you light up a cigarette. Surprised he didn't take you as a smoker he never smelled tobacco on you. Sneaking up behind you, he's hit with what you're really smoking.

"Are you smoking weed?"

"God damnit Ronnie!" Screaming, every single time you're hiding in an alley he finds you. At least it is him that finds you and nobody else. "No it's not weed, they test for that. Hemp cigarettes." You give him a glare.

"You didn't tell me you smoke." Teasing, he gets in your personal space.

"Only when I'm super angry or frustrated. Angry smoke one and done." Irritated from lack of sleep and now this. You’re considering smoking the rest of this pack.

"Why are you angry smoking?" Nodding at the cigarette.

"Where were you today?" Scoffing, you take another drag.

"You get stranger by the day."

"You're welcome." You give him a mini salute.

He takes your cigarette and starts smoking it. "I thought Doctors are against liquor, tobacco and illegal drugs."

"I'm more, do as I say, not as I do. Besides, my patients don't give me any lip." Seeing that he's not going to give that one back. You fish the pack out for another one.

"You don't need those." He grabs the pack before you can open it.

"Excuse you!" He raises the pack above his head as you reach for it. "Ronnie! Give those back!"

"Talk."

"What?" Stunned, you didn't expect him to counter you so quickly.

"What exactly made you frustrated?"

You remain silent. At your reluctance he gives a shrug. "I've got all night."

"Ugh! I don't even know what we are! Are we dating? Are we something? Are we best friends or are we nothing?" With a frustrated groan you start listing off questions that need answers.

"That's why you're frustrated?" Holding back a scoff that's a stupid reason for you to be distracted.

"NO!" Screaming this is becoming too much.

"Then what?"

"How about I get the feeling that I'm about to become a piece of property and not my own person anymore." Angrily you try to shove Ronnie backwards.

"It's not going to be like that." He's shocked that you tried to purposely push him.

"Bullshit." Tears are starting to form.

"It's not."

"Or how about I don't know if what we have going on is real or are you following fucking orders!" Yelling this you run back inside. Leaving him stunned and still holding the pack.

After all the progress you two made after the friend incident. Today's events make you question if it was all a lie. If everything since the party was a lie.

You think he's following orders to be with you? He's liked you from the very beginning. The moment you told him he had to speak up.

No.

He doesn't know why you would think that. He can't have any miscommunication with you. He still feels shitty about the incident at your work. Quickly following you to your apartment. You've already disappeared inside.

"Y/N! We need to talk!" Banging on the door repeatedly. He's surprised when your sister opens it.

"Uhhhh. Y/N can't come to the door right now." There's a very audible thud then Menace 2 Sobriety blasting from the stereo. "Yeah. I wouldn't risk it right now. How about I give you an update later?"

"You sure?" He can't risk it.

Charlie walks into the hall, closing the door behind her. “I don’t know exactly what's going on but I know my sister. She is an asshole. If she’s being mean, it's because she wants to see what your limit is before you walk away. Cruz and our parents fucked her up."

"Shit." Everything is just getting worse.

"But she still likes you so there’s hope. She's stuck with you this long." Shrugging Charlie leans on the wall.

Her comment doesn't ease his mind. He hears footsteps stop behind the closed door across the hall. She must hear it too because he watches your sister turn towards the same door.

"Mind your own business Randy!" Charlie shouts.

"Does he do this a lot?" Questioning about the nosey neighbor, he points at the door.

"Yup." Charlie nods.

Irritated, he bangs on Randy's door. The dude needs to learn.

"Yes? Do-"

"Mind your own business or else." Growling, he glares down at the man.

"O-Okay." Stuttering, Randy can only nod. Quickly slamming his door.

"If he does it again let me know."

"Will do." Charlie heads back to her door. “She needs a ride home Thursday morning. I suggest 7am sharp out front.”

"7am. Got it." Nodding he makes a mental note.

"Oh! You do know her love language, right?" Charlie taps her head as she remembers stuff.

"Huh?"

"Lord she did end up with a Jethro Bodine. Okay you need to Google some shit. But her love language is words of affirmation and acts of service. Also physical touch cause hey we're both touch starved." Shrugging, Charlie plays off the last comment.

"Love language? Is this a real thing?" Suspicious he’s heard of types of love before but not love languages.

"Yes."

"Hmm, why are you helping me?" Staring down he finds Charlie’s shit eating grin annoying.

"Shouldn't everyone have a chance at love?" Smirking Charlie walks inside.

Dumbfounded, that's the most honest response ever.

"Y/N! Over here." Shouting. From the curb he sees you coming out the door.

"What are you doing here?" Scowling you weren't expecting to see Ronnie so soon. Unconsciously you walk slower.

"Charlie said you needed a ride home." He opens the passenger door waiting for you.

"Of course she did."

Reluctantly you climb inside his truck and he shuts the door. Watching him round the front and climb into the driver seat. You don't really feel like arguing and the quicker you get home the quicker you can sleep this situation away.

“Don’t you wear scrubs or whatever at work?” Breaking the silence he eyes the baggy clothes you're wearing.

“We change in the locker room. To prevent cross contamination we only wear specific scrubs while on duty.”

“Ah.” This is going to be harder than he thought. You're not going to be very talkative today.

"I thought you were giving me a ride home." Glaring, you're suspicious about what's going on. Because he just pulled into a diner parking lot.

"Breakfast first. Home later." Turning the truck off he heads inside.

Shaking your head in disbelief. He really is doing detours so he can take the long way around to your house. Unwilling, you follow him into the dinner. Seems like Charlie is trying to help him get on your good side again. Since this happens to be one of your favorite diners to go to afterwork. Sitting in silence across from him. You might as well get free breakfast out of it.

"Your sister mentioned Cruz and your parents the other night." Waiting for food he might as well bite the bullet.

"Cruz is the guy I told you about." Stirring your orange juice with your straw, you avoid his gaze.

"I don't see how it matters years later."

"I'm friends with his sister." Still stirring you look at him like he’s stupid. The Jethro Bodine in him is really coming out.

"Oh."

"Yes, so you can imagine the scandal that was caused." Leaning back you move your cup out of the way. Neither one of you speaks until the waitress has walked away.

"Your parents?"

"Dead to me." Irritated no one has really asked about your parents before. Then again you've never gotten this close romantically for anyone to ask about them.

"You don't talk about your parents." Ronnie reiterates.

Frowning, you know that statement is actually a question. And you know he means your birth parents. "You don't talk about your parents." You match his stare and tone.

"My father died in jail. Mom lives with my brother in Fresno."

"They're both alive. I think. Turns out they're really racist and didn't approve of what I wanted. So they kicked me out when I was eighteen because they couldn't legally control me anymore." Shrugging its old news but it still hurts to talk about.

"Damn." He wasn't expecting that. He was actually expecting it to be something about them not wanting you to be in a dangerous city or morbid job. Shit you're a self made woman. No wonder you act like you do when you're pissed. "Why do you have a hearing problem?"

"While Cruz was crushing my wrist, his sister intervened. In the process I took a smack to the head and it damaged the bones that help you hear on that side. Besides, I have eardrum scarring." Pointing to your right ear.

"Shit."

"Yeah that was a fun ER visit. They didn't buy the BS we were telling."

Oh God. You weren't just part of a violent dispute, you were collateral damage. Just thinking about it makes him upset. You've been plagued with incident after incident with Orcs yet you don't hate them. You're a better person than him.

“Any more questions?” You can see the wheels turning in his head. You've thrown him through a loop already.

“No.” Shaking his head he’s already learned stuff that he wishes he didn't know.

Finally back at your apartment complex, you're both sitting there awkwardly. You have seriously been thinking about the status of your relationship with Ronnie. There needs to be an official title in place. Because you don't need to be doing wifey shit for someone that you're not seriously attached to. But that's a discussion you don't really want to have but definitely need to have right now. Cause either be together or cut all ties.

"You know how to fix a sink?" Looking at him you start making a plan on how you're going to approach this. Non-hostile as possible. Pap taught you that Orc men can be emotionally congested or weird about showing true emotions to their new partner. So best to distract while having the conversation.

“Not really, more of fixing cars than plumbing.” Shaking his head no. Why would you ask that?

“Come on then.” Opening the truck door you nod at him to follow.

“What?”

“Come on and show you how.” Nodding again you get out and shut the door. Staring at him until gets out of the truck.

Once inside your apartment it's obvious that you live here with roommates. Smells of three different people live here. Your apartment is nothing like he thought it was going to look like. Plants are scattered everywhere, an ungodly amount of pillows and blankets on the couch and various Orc religious pieces.

“This way.” Nodding you lead him through your bedroom to the attached bathroom.

Once inside the place smells so much of you it is overwhelming. Seems like the plants have started to take over your bedroom as well.

"Here's the parts and the tools. I'm pretty sure it's just the spring and rubber seat that needs changing but I could be wrong." Opening up the cabinet under the sink, you pull out the supplies you need. Setting the items on the counter. "I can do this but there's one part I need help with." You turn the water off and start working on dismantling hot and cold water handles.

"Don't you need some sleep?"

"I have tonight and the next two days off." You see his quirked eyebrow. "What about you? Don't you have anything you need to be doing?"

"No." He really is trying to focus on your face but you're making it hard. Leaning over just so your butt on display. So badly he wants to follow the curve of it with his hands. But the mirror on the other hand is showing a perfect reflection of your tits. The baggy t-shirt is doing what it does, hang down. There's nothing else he wants to do than to roam your body and claim it.

You hear him take another deep breath and barely catch the ear twitch. “What?”

“Nothing.”

“Uh huh. Pull these valves straight up.” Pointing at the spots where the handles were you backup to give him some room. "That night we met, how did you feel about me? Before you knew all that stuff about my job." Staring him down you watch for any possible twitch or hitch in his breath, any sign that he might be lying.

"You're cute even with your resting bitch face. I was hoping we could hook up and keep seeing each other." It's odd that you ask him now about what he thought. The way you're staring at him makes it feel like he's being interrogated.

"Why did you choose the name Sprinkles?" You know he picked that because you refused to be called Baby but Sprinkles is out there.

"Cause it's sweet, it comes in different colors and shapes. Gives things a whole new level of appreciation. Just like you."

Astonished you don’t know what to say. It's making your brain short circuit that he put that much thought into a nickname when he only knew you for a few hours. The smirk he’s wearing just fuels the fire.

"Wait here." Darting to the kitchen you quickly grab something. Fixing the sink is now on the back burner. You set the little step stool down in front of him. Stepping up you're now almost eye level. "Don't make me regret this."

"What-?"

Pulling him in by his shirt, you carefully kiss him before he can say anything else. Making sure not to bludgeon your face with his tusks.

"I really do like you. I wanted to make sure that was clear." Whispering it's a struggle to bring your eyes to his and you regret doing so. No response. Just a blank unfocused stare. Shit you read him wrong. Panicking you let go. Your hands have gone clammy and anxiety is spiking. How are you going to unfuck this? This is so embarrassing, you want to die now.

Plan B. Plan B. Abandon everything.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean-"

"That night. You turned me down. Why? I smelled you, you were interested." Growling, you’re starting to be wishy washy. Gripping you by the hips he holds you close, you're not going to try and escape.

"Yeah I was but I didn't want to be another notch in your belt. I'm not interested in one night stands. I want a relationship." Struggling a little, his hands have you in a vice grip.

"After everything that's happened? You're stuck with me." He starts chuckling. "As my girlfriend with no influence from Dorghu about it."

"Really?”

"Yes." Chuckling he pulls you closer if that is even physically possible to whisper in your ear. "I also had quite the conversation with Charlie the other day. Well, she was yelling at me for not knowing things."

"Not knowing what?" Turning your head slightly, you're still able to feel his breath on your skin.

"Your love language." A massively warm hand slides slowly up your back. Making you weak, shaking you to the core.

"D-Did you figure yours out as well?" Stuttering you don't know if you're going to kill Charlie or not.

"Words of affirmation and quality time. But physical touch isn't bad either." Giving a smug grin, he leans in for another kiss. Making sure to savor this one.

"Are you assholes done yet? Some of us are trying to sleep." Charlie yells banging on your bedroom door. Jolting you in surprise.

"It's my apartment." Rolling your eyes, speak of the devil.

"Well I don't want to hear sex sounds!"

“She’s always interrupting us.” Hiding a laugh it's true. Any time he has tried to get anywhere near intimate with you, Charlie is there to interrupt.

"Calling the kettle black." Laughing, you ignore her and pull Ronnie back in. The sink can wait until tomorrow.

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little-forget-me-not · 8 months

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Speaking of ocs, I wanted to mention it was interesting that in the noday reunion fight/talk, Day was so unlike his usual self, very paranoid and distrustful, seemed a bit withdrawn even. Goes to show how much stress he's under lol

YEAH I was kinda weirded out by that. But I think it made sense. I'm glad you picked up on the withdrawn part actually! I imagine him being a lot more subdued and he's still outwardly cheery and friendly but…anyone who knows him would see that his smile never reached his eyes and his friendliness was hollow (like a default setting). Inside he's hurting, angry, confused, guilty and deeply disillusioned because his mom had always been like a paragon of "goodness" to him. He saw her like an angel. To have that…ripped away in an instant really shook his world. I mean he even left her to go on this trip-thing. Despite her pleading for him not to leave. And he hasn't really kept in contact with her. It's all very unlike Day. Didn't help that he had no one to talk to about this so it kinda festered in him, and the more he introverted, the more those feelings of distrust and wariness grew. ..and then his ex showed up. Which was kinda like the last straw (over the first last straw)

I was thinking about the power of names. It's such a powerful acknowlegement of a person. And what they choose to identify themself as…is so..telling somehow. I was just thinking about how Day…we always call him Day. But his actual name is "Daymond" (like if you really think about it, it's so weird xD) and he does respond to it but usually in official/formal settings. But even then he doesn't fully relate to it. He prefers Day because it's more casual, it's lighter, friendlier and happier. Also cuz that's what Aeriel called him by, mostly.

Made me wonder about an AU where he doesn't choose that. Like what would've happened to him to make him feel so differently enough he never thinks about keeping that nickname? Interesting stuff. Do you have any thoughts on stuff like this? If he didn't have his mom growing up and was not allowed to explore his sensitive, social and carefree side. Like in an AU where his developmental years pushed to be more closed off, serious, distrustful and cynical..he would probably just go by Daymond.. Granted I am also thinking of like a polar opposite of his upbringing which was full of nurture so it's a little extreme. But I could see that. A Day that learns that emotions are shameful. He'd definitely rely a lot more on his Ti I think. Kinda resentful and wounded with fake smiles and platitudes..but not knowing who he is and not liking it. His relationships would he hollow because he can't really trust or be vulnerable. Ok this went beyond a name and I just came up with an AU him lol

Tomodachi Life him was more faded. He was also trans in that one which gave him depression because he didn't know how and why he was feeling the way he was and had no one he could turn to or trust… Also little socialisation and was isolated. Which apparently turns him into smth like a ghost since he spends too much time in his head.

Nolan kind of the same tho….. like his base is pretty the same…he just either gets more angry/violent vs calmer/chill…the duality of nolan is pretty simple lmfao.

Nolan's core personality is just quite steady. Even when he has growth and maturity he doesn't change that much. Less affected by external influence vs Day.

It's basically Fi vs Fe. Nolan by nature has a more defined sense of self. Even with the best nurture, Day took a long time to understand who he was separate from everyone too…only mid-20s.

#nolan info #day info #bet yall didnt think you'd be seeing these old names huh #fi vs fe

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2-lines-and-a-circle · 2 years

Video

youtube

Link to video above: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9Q89KB_xGs

! Warning ! Emotional talks, mentions of bullying, dark past, slight racism

1,000 + words

I know I don’t usually post things about this or anything similar, but I really want to leave everything behind, and I thought that writing this all out would help me leave it all behind. Also, I hope that if you’re someone going through something similar you can find comfort in this story and know that you are not alone. Or not, for whatever reason you are reading this I hope you respect what I’m about to talk about.

Now you’re probably questioning why I have that amv up on this post, the reason is because I cried when I first saw this and it helped me greatly to move on in life. *spoilers coming up* The amv focuses on the anime movie A Silent Voice where the main character Shōya Ishida bullies a deaf classmate named Shōko Nishimiya. Now he doesn’t bully her all by himself, but it’s a majority of the class who either join or are bystanders to the action. However, when the situation escalades, everyone points fingers at Shōya Ishida alone and this doesn’t end well. Once Shōko Nishimiya leaves the class (due to bullying), Shōya Ishida is then isolated. This leaves a bitter taste in his mouth as he can’t help but think negatively about himself as well as his actions. He acknowledges what he did was wrong and deeply regrets what actions he committed. Yet he slowly starts to block off everyone else as well, this goes to the point where he avoids making any sort of contact. This had all happened when he had been in grade school, and it wasn’t until six years after meeting Shōko Nishimiya again that he really changed.

At first it starts off with Ishida trying to make Nishimiya happy as a way to make up for all those bad memories he gave her. From taking her out to different shops to just being beside her, Ishida does just about anything. Not to mention the fact that he even made enough money to repay his debt for breaking her old hearing aids. However, Ishida still feels regret towards his past actions. He even goes so far as to block everyone with “x” on their faces. It’s not until he learns to trust and befriend that he changes. From the moment Ishida learnt to trust, did he really change from his past self who believed that he deserved to be lonely or that he was unlovable. Of course, there is much more that follows the storyline but that was the main part I wanted to highlight.

Going back to what this has to do to myself, the reason is simple, it’s because I’ve lived a life similar to this. When I was in kindergarten and first grade, I was a bully. Though I’m not proud of this I’m not ashamed either. I had bullied the boys (not the girls, just the boys) for multiple reasons. I thought this was the proper way to play with them. I thought this was interesting. At the time I was quite rebellious and didn’t listen. I just continued thinking this way. It wasn’t until I hit the end of first grade that I had this thought where what I did was wrong. However, it was already too late for me to apologize as I was already moving to a different area. It was at that moment that I knew I had to change for the better. I promised to keep my mouth shut and never harm another boy.

So, when I started second grade at a new school, I made extra precautions to never harm another boy or person no matter the cause. I had been successful too, I never harmed anyone because I never approached anyone. I always stayed silent, until we talked about our favorite food in class. That was when I had been hit with isolation from the boys and girls in my class (not everyone, I did have friends). Maybe it’s because it was too weird for them to handle but I shared that one of the snacks I enjoyed was boiled chicken feet and chicken heart. Of course, this had grossed everyone out as they all shouted how gross it was. During that time, I was purely confused and felt sorry for them as they’ve never had it but I also didn’t fight back. I thought that I should just live with them behaving like that. Little did I know that those kids would get yelled at by their older siblings though. Anyway, fast forward to fourth grade where some boys in the back of my class made fun of me for my looks and I cried. Then in fifth grade I worked hard to study fashion, and this continued all the way to eighth grade. At the same time, I experienced some slight racism like “you eat dogs haha” yeah, I fought back at that point because I was so done. Before I even thought about fighting back, I believed that I should just take those hits because I deserved it as a way to make up for the past.

Once I was in eighth grade, I had to really love myself and understand that I shouldn’t dress for the public eye but for myself. I did learn fairly quickly. Then I entered high school where someone told me, the most shocking words in my life. The first had been “you should be more confident in yourself, you're so pretty”. This shocked me because I thought I was already confident but as I opened up to them, I realized there was still a hole in my heart. I thought I had been pretty confident already but then I opened up and realized I was still scared. I was scared I would attack someone because just like my past self. A little later after working out that problem, a close friend told me that I was so kind to approach them first in becoming friends. To me I didn’t think it was an act of kindness I just thought it was something normal that everyone did. Afterwards I opened up to this boy who I would walk around and talk with during lunch (I was finally okay with boys now). I told him everything and he told me to snap out of being so sad because I was so different from who I was in the past. This was the final blow to me noticing that I was no longer the same person anymore.

Now this post is getting really long so I just summarized what this amv has to do with me. It basically summed up the story of my life and I cried lots. At the same time, I want people to understand that not all bullies stay as bullies. So, if you’re someone who is working on their path to be a better person, it’s okay if you stumble or find it hard at first. You’re going to stumble but you’re going to make it. Just as Shōya Ishida turned his life around I believe you can too!

#anime #movie #sad #i cried #amv #a silent voice #my past #it's okay

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klainesheilen · 4 months

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books and my thoughts on them - January

finished this month

How to Love your Daughter by Hila Blum

My weakness for stories about a complicated mother daughter relationship made me have such high hopes for this book, but then I ended up sitting there like “ok, that’s it?”. We follow it from the mother’s perspective through the whole time. In this time we learn why she has never met her grandchildren and why she also hasn’t any contact with her daughter in the first place. And this sounds promising, especially since she is at a point that she decides to stalk her daughter, finding out where she now lives, does etc, but never decides to talk to her. But we also get this anachronistic order of events and that was so confusing to me way too often. First of all I have listened to it as an audiobook, but the writing just stayed the same in whatever timeline we were. Maybe the physical book did a better job on showing the anachronistic order, but while listening to it I only realised that we are in a certain timeline at the point where for example the mother says something related to her daughters age like school(-work). This realisation came often mid chapter. A thing that I liked tho was how the mother reads some existing books and reflects on them. At the end of the book there was a little list with the mentioned books, and idk I haven’t read something like that before. I mean yes, authors obviously naming books like Romeo and Juliet in their work, but this book hasn’t said either another author or their works name. Just a “I read this one book about a girl, that ….” and this gave me a bigger authenticity and depth of the character to me. In general I think the writer does a great job on describing motherhood (ig, I’m no mother), but at one point it also got so ducking weird. Which I have no clue on if those are normal mother thoughts or just in fact insane. There was this scene where the daughter was an infant and the mother pretended to eat her because she is so cute, but the mother’s thought process escalated low key and I was seriously thinking that she will eat her ducking child. In all it wasn’t really giving what I had expected of the book.

Paris: The Memoir by Paris Hilton

Another audiobook I have listened to. It was a little hard to get into it, because I have seen unclarley’s video about it, where she basically said everything that one needs to know. So it was a lot of repetition for me, but you know, I still wanted to have my own experience with it. As someone growing up and living in Germany I have known the name Paris Hilton as well as the Hilton Hotels, but I never knew what made her famous in the first place. I knew her as the blondie who has nothing in her brain, only partying. And I think that she does a great job reflecting on her party life, her relationships, media and mostly herself. Hilton links most of her behaviour to her back then undiagnosed ADHD, while also mentioning that everything she has done isn’t an excuse for anything, but that these things made her the person she is today. Yet it is “just” Hilton’s perspective on things with a great self awareness and the ability to reflect, while also being true to herself.

Sucker Punch by Roy Williams

My first uni read of 2024. I had to read it for a presentation for my afropessimism class and so I wasn’t surprised by its potential. (do not want to add any more thoughts, because I have my semester break and I don't want to think to hard about uni)

Be not Afraid of Love: Lessons on Fear, Intimacy, and Connection by Mimi Zhu

The youtuber withcindy told in a review that people who are into crystals could enjoy this book. So this and the title were an obvious sign that I should get a copy. I’m always down to grow as a person, but this book wasn’t really giving me any tools on how to do so. The chapters are about a specific feeling on which the author reflected on by mostly linking it to their abusive relationship with X. This makes one clear where the problem with for example shame is and how this also can affect people around us. But besides some rhetorical questions, which may or may not be useful, there weren't really examples on how to leave this shame behind. Maybe it’s my fault for seeing it as a self help book rather than a memoir/autobiography. In all, I think that for me I could take mostly out of the last chapters that were about community, miracles and love, because in them I got some sort of an idea on how to change my views and behaviour to get that feeling of (self-) love.

Currently reading

The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath by Sylvia Plath

This book was so long on my tbr and I have finally decided to buy it by gifting it to myself for Christmas. I sometimes forget how personal and private it actually is what I am reading. Plath’s writing style in her journals and her letters sound so thought through, every word seems so well chosen that I forget that this is a journal and not a fiction story of a girl growing into a woman. There is a kind of comfort in reading Plath thinking and reflecting about herself, boys and men, the meaning of life and also her wish for a writing career. Even this well known person was still a woman who wrote her thoughts and worries down (but in A WAY). I am just 30% in and I take my time reading and processing it.

#bookblr #books #book review #book thoughts #Paris Hilton #memoir #sylvia plath #play #sucker punch #be not afraid of love #how to love your daughter

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natsfirecat · 3 years

Note

Okay! Here’s my request:

Natasha x asexual reader (female),where Natasha confesses her feelings for the reader, but the reader reluctantly rejects her. So after turning down Natasha’s declaration of love, the reader can’t stand seeing Natasha all beaten down and upset, so the reader confesses that she is asexual, telling Natasha that she deserves to be with someone who can give her everything and satisfy her needs. That the reader won’t be enough, no matter how much in love she is with Natasha. But little does the reader know, Natasha doesn’t want those needs, but you.

What do you think? 😃🖤💜🤍

Enough

pairing: Natasha Romanoff x asexual fem reader

word count: 3.5k

summary: much to her dismay, r has to reject her crush, natasha

warnings: swearing, drinking, mentions of sex and sexual attraction, lmk if i need to add any more

A/N: thank you for this request! i love writing for asexual reader sm! i hope you like it, and remember that aces are valid and amazing! :D

also not proofread very well. i'm tired and too lazy rn lmao

You fiddled with your ring, staring blankly at the wall. You had just gotten home from a mission, and needed some time to rest up.

The mission had gone well, you went with Natasha. Your task was to stop a HYDRA attack on civilians. Everything went as planned, and there were no casualties.

Now that you were back, all you wanted to do was rest up and relax.

So, you did just that.

You only woke a few hours later because of Natasha calling you, saying that you had to debrief the mission.

So you reluctantly got out of bed, and made your way to the meeting room.

Fury was there, reading files, and Natasha sat in her usual seat. Her face lit up when you walked in, then she waved and motioned for you to sit down.

As Fury started going over the mission, you just gave short, straight to the point answers to his questions.

It wasn’t until Natasha gave a detailed summary that he let you leave.

While walking out the room, she stopped you.

“Are you going to Tony’s party tonight?”

“Wanda’s making me,”

She laughed, knowing that you most definitely would not be going to a social gathering unless one of your friends forced you.

“Well, I think it’ll be fun. I’ll see you there,”

You were about to shrug and go on a rant about how Tony’s parties were very much overrated, but she simply waved goodbye and made her way down the hallway back to her room.

You were about to do the same before you felt someone tap your arm from behind.

You whipped around, then grinned to see Carol.

“You’ve been back and haven’t seen me yet?”

“Sorry…” you muttered, suddenly feeling guilty.

“You can make it up to me by getting me food,”

You rolled your eyes, then agreed, knowing you would get yourself food too.

She gave you a satisfied smile before beginning to walk down the steps towards the garage of cars.

She stepped into the driver’s seat of course, while you followed behind in the passenger’s seat.

“IHOP?” She asked, despite the fact that it was 3:00 in the afternoon.

“Yes!”

“Great, you’re buying!”

You rolled your eyes, already knowing she would say that.

“So how’d the mission go?” She asked.

“It was fine, nothing exciting happened.

“As soon as we convince Fury to let you come to space with me for missions, things will get a lot more exciting for you,”

You smiled, then chuckled at her statement.

She would talk to you about space all the time, and you had often expressed interest in it. So she took it upon herself to make a slideshow presentation about why you should be allowed to go with her to space. It still needed some work, but she was absolutely planning on presenting it to Fury when it was done.

“Where will you take me?”

“Well we’d start off with something close, maybe not exit the galaxy neighborhood quite yet,”

You laughed again, looking forward to your space adventures with your best friend.

Carol had eaten about a quarter of her food before she broke the silence,

“So I heard you tell Natasha that you’re going tonight,”

“Yeah,” you said with a shrug, choosing to stare at your pancakes instead of making eye contact.

“Well that’s good, maybe you guys can talk and…”

“And what?” You were beginning to get a little irritated.

“Oh come on! We both know how you feel. Why can’t you just talk with her about it?”

“You know why, Carol,” you said as you subconsciously began to fidget with the black ring you always wore on the middle finger of your right hand.

She sighed, not wanting to fight you on this. So she went back to eating her pancakes, and didn’t say another word about it to you.

As you reluctantly promised, you were at the party that night. Not wanting to engage too much, you stood off at the edge of the room, taking a small sip of your drink.

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Wanda and Natasha talking. You thought nothing of it, until you saw Wanda wink at her.

You turned your head to the side, then accidentally made eye contact.

Quickly shifting your gaze to the floor, you took another sip of your drink to hide your embarrassment.

You then decided to walk away, not wanting to create any more awkward tension.

You made your way into the next room until you almost bumped into Sam, who gave you a weird look as he stepped away from you.

“You alright, L/N?” He asked.

“I’m good!” You told him, quickly walking away.

When you finally got to the corner of the other room, you took a deep breath. You finally let yourself relax against the wall, away from the person you wanted to avoid tonight.

You closed your eyes for a minute, pretending you weren’t here.

For just a moment, it worked; you weren’t a loud, crowded party. You were just happy in your room watching movies and eating popcorn. No one was bothering you, and you didn’t have to worry about anything.

Unfortunately, your moment didn’t last.

Your eyes opened again when you heard your name called several times. Standing in front of you, was Natasha.

You noticed both Wanda and Carol standing at the door, watching the both of you.

“Hi, Y/N,” she said, her voice shakier than normal. “There’s something I wanted to talk to you about, can we talk somewhere more private?”

You nodded, then began to follow her back the way you came until you were in another hallway that didn’t have anyone in it.

“Y/N,” she began. “I’ve always liked you as a person, I think you’re brilliant on the field, and I just love being around you. I feel these things around you, and it’s scary. But there’s something between us, I can feel it, and I think you feel it too. I’d like to explore these feelings, so… would you want to go out together… on a date?”

You let out a sigh as your heart dropped. You felt tears coming to your eyes as you thought about what she was saying to you. As much as it would hurt both of you, you had to do it.

“I’m really sorry, Natasha, but no. I can’t.”

“Oh-” she was taken aback from your response, unable to hide the disappointment in her voice. “This was stupid, you’re right. I’m sorry for even asking in the first place, I-” she couldn’t even finish her sentence before walking off, leaving you alone.

Two days later, Natasha had barely left her room. She stayed under the covers, mostly trying to sleep. Of course, it eventually turned into hours of staring at the ceiling while her stomach was in knots.

So, she took a sip from the bottle of vodka she brought up to her room, and leaned back against the headboard.

As soon as she felt tears forming in her eyes, she grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. She watched the saddest movies and TV shows she could think of, and ended up finishing the entire bottle.

If she was going to be sad and cry, it would be from too much drinking while watching sad stuff. It wouldn’t be from you. Natasha refused to let herself cry over a simple rejection.

But it wasn’t a simple rejection.

She’s had these feelings for you for months.

Your smile has made her heart flutter since your first mission with her. She vividly remembers the way your eyes lit up when you found out you were paired with her.

The two of you ended up working so well together. At the end of the mission, you held both your hands up for a double high five. The gesture confused her at first, but she eventually gave in and placed her hands against yours. That’s when you gave her the same smile that still gives her butterflies.

She didn’t even start to notice it until a few months ago, when Clint called her out on it. He noticed that your name was brought up in their conversations a lot. So he blatantly asked her what her feelings for you were.

Of course, she denied everything at first. You were just a friend who was nice to work with. Nothing more.

She didn’t fully realize it until Wanda called her out on it too.

You were eating breakfast, and Natasha’s eyes never left you. You exchanged smiles a few times, and the butterfly feeling in her stomach kept growing.

Wanda saw, feeling a smile grow on her face as she glanced between the two of you. Of course, her powers made this even more fun for her.

While she didn’t usually like to invade people’s private thoughts, especially her friends’, Natasha’s thoughts were loud. Yours too.

So after you got up, and waved goodbye to the both of them, Wanda immediately cornered Natasha. Normally, she wouldn’t do something like that to the assassin, but she felt okay with it considering that her thoughts of you softened her up a bit.

“So, when are you planning on asking Y/N out?” She asked her.

“What are you talking about?”

“You guys would make such a good couple, you should ask her out!”

“Absolutely not! We’re just friends,”

Wanda let out a huff, then rolled her eyes.

“You seem to forget that I’m a telepath,”

This time, Natasha rolled her eyes at her.

“Stay out of my head, Maximoff,”

And with that, she walked away, not wanting to talk about it any longer.

Of course, Wanda had other plans.

The next week, she made mental notes of how the two of you would interact. No matter how much you both denied it, she knew you had feelings for each other.

While you smiled around everyone, you smiled the most around her. Your eyes would light up, and you’d be grinning from ear to ear. And your smile would usually cause her to reciprocate it. She rarely smiled, but she was okay with you seeing her smile.

On top of that, Wanda noticed all the small gestures you would do for each other.

She would pack your bag for missions often, and you would share your food with her.

While both of those things could be seen as platonic, she knew better. You definitely had feelings for each other.

So when she brought it up to Natasha again, she couldn’t even deny it this time.

“Tell anyone, and I’ll make you feel pain you didn’t even know could be felt,” Natasha threatened her.

Wanda nodded, promising that she only wanted to help her.

Eventually, the assassin gave in and let her plan the whole thing out.

It would work out in the end, it had to.

Now, Natasha let out a growl of frustration as Wanda entered her room.

“Can you at least knock?”

“I’m worried about you, Nat,”

Despite her glares, Wanda continued walking towards her until she sat down on the foot of her bed.

“Why do you even care? You lied to me, you said it would work!”

“I really thought it would, I’m so sorry. But you can’t keep yourself locked in here, we’re all worried about you,”

“I can’t face her after I humiliated myself like that. Why would you tell me she had feelings for me too? You said you could tell from her thoughts, but she clearly doesn’t see me that way. Now I’ve probably ruined my friendship with her too.”

“I don’t know why that happened,”

“Please, just leave me alone.”

Letting out a disappointed sigh, Wanda realized this would get her nowhere. Natasha still needed a bit more time.

As she saw her friend leave the room, she finally allowed the tears to fall again.

She hated herself for it, but maybe she actually was crying over you.

It wasn’t like you were doing any better.

You only left your room to train with Carol, and to bring food back up to your room since you didn’t want to eat with everyone else.

You couldn’t help but notice the way Wanda glared at you when you passed her in the hallway. You ended up glaring right back, surprised by her sudden hostility towards you.

The two of you had been relatively close, but she was especially close with Natasha. You knew you had hurt her with your rejection, but in the end, you were doing her a favor.

She’d understand that eventually, and hopefully, so would Wanda.

For now, you lay in bed. You were clinging tightly onto your pillow, letting a few sobs escape.

Even though you knew the rejection was for the best, for both you and Natasha, it didn’t make it hurt any less.

You were only saving the both of you from future heartbreak. It would be worth it eventually. Soon enough, you’d both get over it and go back to being the friends you once were.

However, now you continued crying into your pillow.

You wished you could just turn feelings on and off with a switch, but you couldn’t. It would make things so much easier if these feelings didn’t exist in the first place.

You had tried to suppress and deny them at first.

You ignored the way you felt yourself smiling more at her. You ignored the way you felt like you were on top of the world when she returned your smile. You ignored the way your stomach turned into a knot of nerves whenever you touched; whether it was a full on hug or just fingers brushing past each other in the hallway.

When she sat next to you on movie night though, closer than she normally did, that’s when you realized you couldn’t ignore the feelings anymore.

You wanted to completely close the distance between the two of you, and snuggle completely into her. You wanted to kiss her, and hold her tight. You wanted everything to do with her.

But you couldn’t have her, and it hurt like hell.

After another two days, Carol came barging into your room.

“Y/N, what the fuck?” She said, getting straight to the point.

Your eyes widened, but you said nothing as she sat down and glared at you.

“You’ve been sulking for days, and haven’t done anything about it,”

You shrugged, sinking back father into the bed.

“What do you want me to do?”

“Talk to her!”

“No! I’m just gonna stay here until my feelings go away,”

“Y/N, I love you, platonically, but sometimes you’re the dumbest person I know,”

“Thanks, Carol,”

“Your feelings aren’t gonna magically go away like that. If you don’t wanna date her, then at least talk to her so you can both have some closure on this!”

“I can’t, she’d never understand and it’d just be a whole thing, and I don’t want that,”

“You explained it to me and I understood,”

“Well yeah, cuz it doesn’t affect you at all. It affects her because it’s the reason I can’t be with her,”

“Have you ever thought to consider that maybe she wouldn’t mind?”

“Of course she’d mind, Carol,”

Sighing, your best friend decided she wasn’t gonna win this battle today.

Despite her anger towards you, she still reached over and hugged you before getting up and leaving.

Once again, you were left alone in your own misery.

You began to fidget with your ring, staring at the flag on your wall. The black, grey, white, and purple colors stood out against the wall, adding a nice touch to your room.

You were obviously proud and unashamed of who you were, but that didn’t change the fact that so many people didn’t understand it. So it was just easier to not bring it up. Maybe one day you could find someone like you, who’d understand.

Tears began to fill your eyes as you thought about Natasha. You hated that you had to do this.

You weren’t even sure if you would be able to salvage your friendship at the end of this. That just made everything worse.

You lay back down again, clinging onto the pillow once more.

You remembered the way you felt when Natasha first smiled at you. You remembered the happiness she made you feel. You remembered just how much you wanted to be around her.

Luckily, your thoughts of misery finally stopped when you managed to fall asleep.

The next day, Carol dragged you out of your room. Literally dragged, she grabbed both your wrists and pulled you out of the bed until you hit the floor.

“Ow! What the fuck?”

“No more sulking, you’re getting up and not coming back to your room until tonight. Let’s go,”

You sighed in defeat, then stood up, following her out of your room.

She dragged you downstairs to the kitchen, where she already had breakfast laying out for you.

As annoyed as you were with her, you definitely thought it was sweet that she was going through all this effort for you.

So you sat down and began eating, forcing a smile. You were still hurting, but for now, you could fake it in front of your friend.

She sat down next to you, and seemed satisfied.

You gave a small smile, then continued eating.

It was progress.

When Natasha finally came down, you were the last person she expected to see. Her bloodshot, puffy eyes widened as she saw you with Carol.

She immediately looked away, not wanting to face you, especially like this.

Unfortunately for her, you had already made eye contact for a moment. You took in her appearance, letting out a deep exhale.

She refused to say anything, then turned around as if she had never been there in the first place.

As soon as she left, you turned back to Carol.

“I really messed up, didn’t I?”

As much as the logical part of your mind tried to convince you not to do this, the other part was currently making you.

So now, you stood outside Natasha’s bedroom, hand hovering over the door, prepared to knock.

You took in a few deep breaths, trying to prepare yourself. Just as you were about to knock, the door swung open before you were ready.

“Y/N?” Natasha didn’t expect to see you after what happened. “What are you doing?”

“Can we please talk?”

She frowned, thinking about what happened the last time you two talked. But, she opened the door wider, letting you in.

You walked over to her bed, waiting for her to nod, giving you permission to sit down.

“I just wanted to start off by saying that I’m really sorry for this, for hurting you like that,”

“You don’t need to apologize. You can’t change how you feel.”

“I know, but here’s the thing; I have feelings for you too,”

Her eyes widened in both shock and confusion.

“Then why’d you say no?”

You took in a few more deep breaths, preparing yourself.

“I’m asexual,” you finally got out. “While I feel romantic attraction to you, and really like you, I’m not sexually attracted to you. I’m not sexually attracted to anyone.”

She tilted her head to the side, but continued listening as you went on.

“So as much as I do like you, it’s not fair for us to be together. You deserve someone who can give you everything you want and need in a relationship, and I can’t do that.” You told her, trying to prevent yourself from crying. “No matter how much I love you, I won’t be enough,”

That’s what broke you, causing the tears to stream down your face as they had so many times within the past few days. Telling her everything you had been thinking, and finally getting it out.

You noticed a few tears forming in her eyes as she sat down next to you, wrapping her arm around your shoulder.

“Thank you for telling me,” she said. “I wish you had told me earlier, though,”

“I know, I’m sorry,”

“You’re wrong though,”

“About what?”

“You are enough for me, Y/N. I don’t care about sex, I just want you.”

“Really? You mean it?”

“Of course I do,”

You let out a gasp, then turned and wrapped both your arms around her, leaning in between her chest and neck.

“You’re okay with kisses though, right?”

You smiled, then leaned in and crashed your lips against hers. That certainly answered her question.

It felt like a weight was lifted off the both of you. You loved being like this with her, lips connected and arms wrapped around one another. You never wanted to let go.

When you had to break apart for air, Natasha smirked at you.

“So how about that date now?”

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x yn #natasha romanoff x fem reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff asexual #natasha romanoff x asexual reader #natasha romanoff x asexual!reader #black widow #black widow x reader #black widow asexual #black widow x asexual reader #black widow x fem reader #natalia alianovna romanova

481 notes · View notes

peepeepotter · 3 years

Text

Late Night Encounters Part 3

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader

Warnings: SMUT!! Female receiving oral, unprotected vaginal penetration

Word Count: 3.5K

A/N: It’s my birthday so I didn’t proofread this!! I’m sorry!!

Once again, Fred had a date. He woke up that morning and remembered every bit of what he had said, and stood by his words. He told Y/N he still wanted to see the ring on the table when he got home. He wanted her to think about it for at least 24 full hours before she made a decision.

Y/N and Fred had narrowly missed each other that morning. He was off running errands for the day and she had only just woken up. He was home for lunch and she was out with Hermione. Y/N felt her heart sink, feeling guilty for wanting to see him. Why guilt, though? She didn’t feel like she had a valid reason to feel guilty. After she got home from lunch Fred had already left for his date, so she fell asleep on the couch in the living room, figuring it was a good way to pass the time until she saw her new best friend again.

“Why was this on the kitchen table?” George asked, waking Y/N up out of her sweet, dreamless sleep on the couch. He was holding the ring.

“I can’t sleep with jewelry on.” She shrugged, getting up and going to grab the ring. He held it up higher. She almost laughed until she saw the look on his face.

“I’m serious.” She sighed heavily at this.

“I know, George.”

“You know what?” The audacity that men have.

“I know you’re sleeping with her again.”

“W-what?” He almost dropped the ring.

“I just don’t get it, George.”

“I w-wouldn’t do that again.”

“Except you are.”

“Why are you accusing me right now?”

“Because I’m not dumb! Just because I trust you doesn’t mean I’m dumb! I’m not naive. The first time, sure. This time, no! It’s the same as last time, but you thought I’d stay with you just because you proposed this time! Maybe I won’t, did you think about that? What if you get her pregnant? Did you just expect me to stay around and raise the kid? Or what if we both get pregnant, who are you leaving alone with their child?”

“I cannot believe this right now--”

“Stop that! Stop it! You’re gaslighting me! You know I’m right! Stop lying!”

“Fine!”

“How long?”

“A year.”

“So immediately after we got back to where we were.”

“Yes.”

“Why? What did I do? Why am I not enough for you?”

“Maybe if you--”

“Actually, no, fuck you. I’m enough for me. I’m enough for so many people. I gave you a second chance and you fucking blew it! I’ve done so much for you, for Fred, too!”

“I--” He sighed. He was speechless. It was the first time you’d really fully stood up for yourself. It was on him, he knew that. “I think...I’m going to spend the night at the Burrow, and we’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

“No.”

“What?”

“Go, spend the night with her, but don’t lie to me and say you’re staying with your mom.” She spoke bluntly, tears streaming out of her eyes quietly. It was a silent cry, the only way Y/N ever allowed herself to cry in front of people. He hesitated, but he turned around and left the living room. Y/N entered the kitchen, starting to grease pans for baking.

Fred came home that night, mostly confused. Y/N wasn’t in the living room tonight, which didn’t make him feel great. That wasn’t the worst of it though. The date was great. She was perfect, but...he hated it. Something was missing. As she listed off interests, favorite movies, her favorite quidditch team...all he could think was that something was missing. When he got home, and Y/N was missing, it dawned on him. It was her. She was missing. The girl had listed off all of Y/N’s favorite movies, her favorite songs. She liked to bake. Her favorite quidditch team was the Holyhead Harpies, the team his little sister played on. Suddenly, Fred felt rather sick. He can’t have feelings for his brother's girlfriend--no, fiance!

With a pit in his stomach, he walked into the kitchen, where he opened his eyes wide. The entire kitchen table and window sill were covered in baked goods. There was one clean counter, where Y/N sat staring off into space, waiting for her next round of cookies to finish.

“Oh! I forgot! I’m sorry, how was the date?”

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh nothing--”

“Don’t, please don’t close yourself off. We’re close now, just let me in. What happened, what’s with the baked goods?” He asked, leaning with his arms crossed and his back against the island counter across from where she sat. He noticed the ring was missing, it wasn’t on Y/N’s finger, it wasn’t on the counter or the table where he’d seen it last.

“He admitted it. He’s cheating on me with her again.” She sighed, looking to the ceiling and holding back tears. “And it sucks so hard to know he wasted all this time of mine again. He proposed to me. I know he’s your brother, but that’s just so...crazy. Who does that?” She paused, and just as Fred was about to talk she kept going. “And the worst part is that I don’t...I don’t feel anything. The first time he cheated with Angelina it was like my whole world came crashing down. He was my best friend, my boyfriend, and my roommate. Now, it barely even feels like we’re roommates. I thought I could love him the same way after it all, and maybe he cheated because I couldn’t.”

“Don’t blame yourself. Cheating is always a decision. If he realized you didn’t love him the same way he should have communicated with you. Broken up. Not proposed and delayed this.” Fred sighed. Y/N wouldn’t make eye contact with Fred, assumingly because she was upset.

“I--” She paused, chest tight. She looked up at Fred, making blatant eye contact. “What if I’ve been emotionally cheating?” Fred’s eyes widened and his heart sank. He felt awful, like his feelings for her would just have to go away again. Right as they were getting close.

“W-what? With who?”

“You fucking idiot.” She sighed, pushing herself off the counter. She went to walk away, but Fred put his arms on either side of her on the counter, pinning her where she was.

“Don’t walk away.” He whispered, so close to her face. Her heart pounded.

“I--” She sighed. “Fred, I’ve felt more for you in the past five days than I’ve felt for George in the past year and a half. I waited all day for you to be here, and I kept feeling guilty for it. I’ve felt so guilty, and then I find out he’s cheating and I’m so numb to it because you’re all I can think about.” She paused to breathe before she continued her quick ramblings. “Also, the idea of having feelings for you is so weird, because we only just started to like each other, but you’re standing so close to me and all I can hear is my heart pounding in my ears. I can’t stop thinking about all the girls you used to bring home and how I don’t want to be just one of those girls you sleep with. But obviously I can’t just be with you because I think I just broke off my engagement with your brother and also because you haven’t said anything--” So Fred, in his overwhelmed state, pushed forward and pressed his lips against hers. She grabbed both sides of his face as he grabbed her hips. After a few moments, he quickly pulled apart, moving one of his hands to keep her hand on his face in place

“I couldn’t tell you the other night, but I had feelings for you that summer before the war, but you were with George. I couldn’t...I couldn’t just confess then, and besides you were so happy with him. Then we didn’t like each other, and the night before you got engaged I couldn’t stop thinking about you all over again. And...George made us spend all that time together and you’re the only thing I think about. The girl I went on the date with was so perfect, but I couldn’t get you off my mind and I realized she was just like you. But she wasn’t. She wasn’t you, no one will ever be you.” Fred spoke in a hushed tone with his eyes closed, as if speaking any louder or seeing her would make Y/N evaporate into thin air. Slowly, he opened his eyes to see her with tear tracks down her face.

“I don’t think anyone’s ever said anything that nice to me before.” She whispered, taking the hand that wasn’t trapped by his and wiping her face. He giggled, letting go of her hand and using both of his hands to hold the sides of her face. He leaned forward and kissed the tear stains on Y/N’s face. “You’re like this perfect man, it’s so wildly different from George.” She mumbled.

“I can’t account for where he went wrong, and I haven’t always been great. But if you give me the chance, I will love you better than anyone else could dream of.” With tears streaming down her eyes she pulled him in to kiss her again, he smiled against her lips. He held the small of her waist as she rested one of her hands on his chest, the other sat at the back of his neck playing with his hair. He moaned when she pulled it gently, causing her to smile into their kiss. She almost missed being able to see him rolling his eyes at her smirk.

“Love me, please. Tonight, tomorrow, every day. Just--love me tonight.” She whispered against his lips as they panted for air.

He leaned down, kissing her again as he grabbed the back of her thighs and lifted her back to a sitting position on the counter. Y/N threaded her fingers through Fred’s hair, one of Fred’s hands was on her thigh, the other rested on her waist. Finally, she bit his bottom lip in an attempt to get him to do anything. In response, he gave a noise that sounded between a groan and a growl, moving to her neck to leave bite marks. He licked the shell of her ear and bit the lobe as he moved down to the length of her neck, sucking hard. She moaned softly, whimpering when he used he grazed his teeth over her neck.

She started grinding her hips against his in an attempt to get some friction. He grabbed her hips, pulling her closer to him to aid in her plight for friction. After he felt satisfied with the bruises he’d left on her neck he went back to her lips, sucking on her bottom lip briefly before licking it in a silent asking of permission to use it. She gracefully licked his tongue, granting his own tongue admission to her mouth. Their tongues wrestled messily, Y/N playing with Fred’s hair and occasionally pulling softly to hear him moan. She was starting to feel frustrated with just grinding, so she moved the hand that was on the side of Fred’s face to gracefully feel all the way down his body before she started palming him through his slacks. He gave a harsh groan this time, pulling apart from her mouth briefly.

“You’re so beautiful, so sexy.” His voice was deep with pleasure and she moaned at the sound alone. Her heart swelled, she hadn’t been praised like that sexually...ever. Fred took one of his hands off of her hips to thread into her hair, pulling gently to hear her moan. He swore to himself that he could hear that every minute of every day and never get tired of it. While Fred knew he was going to fuck her, his intentions were pure-- he wanted to make love to her. Y/N, however, was getting frustrated with his politeness. She started to unbutton his slacks and he broke off their kiss again. “Hold on, I want to take care of you.” He whispered, flush against her lips.

“I appreciate that, but I want you inside of me.” She whispered, her hand that had been unbuttoning his pants was now tangled in his shirt. Fred felt his heart drop to his cock when she said this, groaning at her lack of restraint. Y/N started unbuttoning his shirt as he separated her thighs and pulled her completely to the edge of the counter.

“You’ll just have to be patient, princess.” He grinned as he went to crouch, kissing her knee on the way down. He left kisses all over the inside of her thighs, leaving her soaked to the core before he had even really touched her. Both Fred and Y/N were thankful she was wearing a dress that day, making his access considerably easier as he rubbed her through only her thin panties. Kissing the inside of her thigh as he looked up into her eyes, he felt like the luckiest man alive. He almost grinned when he saw she was adorning another pair of fruit covered panties.

“You know, I wasn’t kidding when I said the cherry panties were sexy,” He smirked up at her, rubbing circles into her clit through peach covered cotton. “These are sexy too, but I think they’d look a lot better on the floor.” He grabbed the cotton on her hips and pulled them down, leaving them on the floor like he promised. Y/N’s thighs were shaking from all the teasing he had done already. He licked from her inner knee to where he promised to take care of her, latching his mouth onto her clit. She gasped at the feeling of his warm tongue, closing her eyes. He used his tongue to create figure-8’s against her clit, and slowly pushed one finger into her. At this, she threw her head back, resting the crown of her skull gently against the cabinet behind her. She laced her fingers through Fred’s hair, now pulling hard. He groaned in his own pleasure, creating vibrations against her clit which in turn made her moan. He pushed a second finger into her, slowly pumping them as he worked her clit. After adding a third finger, her legs were shaking violently, showing she was nearing the edge. He quickly swapped his fingers and tongue, using his thumb to rub circles against her clit and sticking his tongue as deep as he could inside of her warm pussy. He had his other arm wrapped around her thigh, one of her hands reaching to hold the hand there as she neared her end even faster than before.

“I want you to say my name when you cum, baby, can you do that for me?” He paused briefly, looking up at her, she nodded vigorously. His tongue returned to it’s warm reserve inside of her. The motions he made with his thumb against her clit became faster, and soon enough she was squeezing his hand and nearly screaming his name. Fred waited for her to stop squeezing his hand to stand up and kiss her on the lips again. “You did so good, baby.” He whispered against her lips.

“Freddy,” She whimpered against his lips. “You haven’t even fucked me yet and I don’t think I’ll be able to walk.” She almost laughed at the thought. He grinned, happy with his work so far. He tucked a strand of her behind her ear, kissing her ear as he spoke.

“You won’t need to, baby. I’ll fuck you right here,” He started licking and kissing her neck again, making her whine. “And I’ll take care of you so you don’t have to walk.” He whispered against her quickly bruising flesh. She whined again, reaching to finish her job unbuttoning his shirt and unzipping his already unbuttoned pants. He let her continue as he wrapped his hand in her hair once and pulled back, exposing the front of her neck to him where he continued his attack. When she finished unbuttoning his shirt he helped her pull it off his shoulders, exposing his freckled and scarred skin on his chest to her. She rubbed her hands against his chest, feeling every individual scar and wondering where each of them came from. He watched her eyes dart around, a small closed-lip smile adorning her face as she felt the raised white scars. He rubbed his thumb against her cheek softly, loving his own view. Using the same hand that was petting her cheek, he lifted her face to look up at his. He pulled her face close to his own and kissed her softly.

“I love you, Y/N.” He whispered against her lips with his eyes closed. She smiled, reaching her face up to kiss his eyelids. Angel kisses on his blonde eyelashes. It was a sweet moment, to remind them both that not only was there no going back after what they were about to do, but also to remind them that this wasn’t just fucking. This was real, unadulterated love. He opened his eyes, looking deeply into hers as she pushed his slacks and boxers down as far as she could with her hands, using her bare feet the rest of the way. He lifted her dress over her head, tossing it somewhere behind him, inevitably landing on some type of baked good. She rested one hand against his jaw, pulling his face close to hers, her other hand pumping his cock and gently rubbing the tip. He closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath at the feeling of her small hand around him. He rested one hand on her jaw, mirroring her. His other hand rested on the small of her back to push her closer to him. They kissed gently, feeling like this moment was fragile and could be broken. Y/N moved the hand that was on his cock and squeezed his bicep, quietly communicating that she was ready. He moved his hand from the small of her back to line himself up with her entrance, and as he pushed in the both gasped quietly at the feeling. Fred rested his forehead on Y/N’s shoulder, eyes closed as he waited quietly and politely for her to adjust to his size. After a few moments she tapped him to tell him to move, her eyes squeezed tightly closed for preparation of any pain that would come from his movements. He moved slowly, truly taking this moment to get to know Y/N’s body. He felt every groove inside of her, every dip and small raise in her skin, memorising her inside and out. As they both started to get used to this puzzle-piece moment in which it felt like the clicking of soul-mates finally coming together, they started kissing again. Fred’s tongue entered her mouth, exploring, dead set on memorising her entire body. Her hands found themselves resting on his back, nails digging in every so often. If this had been her sex dream, she would’ve been wondering how many girls had dug their nails into his back, but in person all she could think about was him. He filled her every sense, she could smell him, feel him everywhere, taste him, his freckled skin stuck on her eyes even when they closed, and their shared moans overwhelmed her ears. If this was what making love was, she definitely had never shared that with George.

Fred lowered his hand, rubbing her clit gently as his pace got faster. He wasn’t sure if he had ever felt so good so quickly, he was almost positive he hadn’t ever felt his high come so quickly. As he pounded into Y/N’s g-spot and rubbed her clit, she found herself loudly moaning. Her nails were now leaving deep marks into Fred’s back, and Fred hadn’t even noticed.

“Fred,” She moaned his name loudly, the sound of which made his own high come even faster. Set on finding their highs together, they were flush together. Y/N nor Fred had never been so close to someone, their entire bodies touching. Her legs were wrapped around him, her torso flush against his and her face buried into his chest. His face was buried into her neck, leaving occasional kisses to avoid his own moans. Quickly, they found their highs together. After hitting her g-spot so many times, she warned him. He quietly thanked Godric, his own high coming as well. So as they came together, panting, completely embraced, they felt loved. They’d both felt fucked-out before, but this felt different. This felt simultaneously heavy and weightless on their hearts, and they stayed together for a long time. They kissed quietly, Fred not really wanting to leave her, and she not wanting him to leave her either. Before he pulled out she spoke.

“I love you too, Freddy.”

Tag list: @fredshufflepuff @melonoptimist @phelps-weasley-twins @maybeisthemoon @groovynachos @katllol @manuosorioh @brownieparker @superblyspeedydragon @packmentalityx @missryerye @p0gue420 @hogwartshomiehopper @skarlettmikaelson @seppys-return-to-madness @fandomscombine @wzardweasley @eattheboat @mgchaser @borhap-boiiii @gabiconstellation @hardpartybasketballshepherd @superpowereddonut @sukunas-cult-leader @whysoseriousssssssss @skateb0red @urgingforyou @lookscutebutwillfight

permanent tag list: @potters-heart @0x0spunky-monkey0x0

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queen-haq · 3 years

Photo

Fic: A Woman Scorned - Part 1

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Words: ~2200 words.

Summary: You’ve been sleeping with Billy Russo for a few months now. Knowing his aversion to any kind of emotional commitments, you’re satisfied with your clandestine arrangement until you catch him having dinner with Dinah Madani one night. Then it finally dawns on you. It’s not that he doesn’t want to commit, he just doesn’t want to commit to *you*.

Billy may think he knows you, but he has no idea what he’s just lost...

~~~~~~

You met Billy Russo at an industry conference two years ago. While you didn’t know much about military security at that time, your specialty was online security and both of you ended up attending a lot of the same events. He was the most beautiful man you’d ever seen, magnetic and a total flirt, and it was obvious he was aware of his good looks and used it to his benefit. You didn’t sleep with him during the conference. Something told you his dance card was already full every night. So, instead, you exchanged contact information and left it at that.

A year later you were hired as a consultant for one of Anvil’s direct competitors and moved to New York City. When Billy called you to meet for drinks, you knew exactly what he was up to. You were no fool. He wanted information on your employer and thought he could charm you into spilling secrets. You told him it wouldn’t work over a second drink, and he simply laughed.

You didn’t fuck him until a month later. The official reason for the delay was conflicting schedules but mostly it was due to insecurity on your part. To the outside world you were attractive in the kind of way that snuck up on people. You weren’t the type to turn heads, like Billy was, and your fucked up childhood had ensured you didn’t let anyone in easily. It wasn’t until a pep talk from your best friend, Davina, about enjoying Billy Russo for what he was – a fun time and nothing more - did you finally decide to take the leap.

Fucking Billy had been unlike anything you’d experienced before. You’d had sex before of course, but not the kind of sex that made you lose all of your inhibitions and scream and come for hours. Billy knew how to coax you out of your shell and demand things from him you’d never even knew you wanted. You fucked him in your apartment, his penthouse, the underground parking lot, in his car and that was all within the first week. He had opened up a whole new world for you and you were willing to try anything and do anything he wanted. After that first night together, all the walls you’d built around your heart collapsed. Your best friend warned you repeatedly that great sex made people confuse lust for love, that she was worried you were falling for Billy, but you told her you were an adult and could handle yourself.

Of course that had been bullshit.

It had been been almost a year now since you and Billy were sleeping together and you had no idea where you stood with him. You didn’t even know if he was fucking other women, though a part of you suspected he was. If he was with you two nights a week that left five other nights to be with someone else. It clawed at you, knowing you weren’t enough for him. It heightened all of your insecurities, made you believe that you were worthless and ugly just like your abusive father used to scream at you. Of course you’d never tell Billy that. The minute he suspected you were getting attached to him emotionally he’d bolt, he’d already warned you of that. So you kept your thoughts to yourself and let your pain eat away at your insides when he wasn’t with you.

At least that had been the plan until you saw him on a date with Madani.

You were at a restaurant with some of your coworkers, enjoying happy hour, when you got up to use the bathroom and spotted Billy sitting in the other corner of the room. The breath rushed out of your lungs, your knees felt weak. They were enraptured with each other, legs intertwined, heads close, a true couple. You knew who she was because he’d let it slip he’d been working with Homeland on something and, you being you, you’d looked her up. Her pictures didn’t do her justice, because she was stunning. And exactly the type of woman Billy would be proud to be seen with.

After you and Billy started sleeping together, Billy rarely took you out. Sure you guys would go to some hole-in-the-wall places or fast food joints but never to fine restaurants, not like this one. You never complained because why waste time when you could be busy fucking his brains out? Except now that you saw him and Madani sitting only a few feet away from you, and he was proudly holding her hand and being openly affectionate, you realized it had all been by design. He never took you out because he was ashamed of you. If you had been prettier, thinner, sexier, taller – anything but what you already are – he’d want you as more than a fuck buddy. He’d want you as his girlfriend.

It was a bitter pill to swallow but at least now you knew the truth and that meant you were back in control of your life.

As much as it hurt, it felt good to know you were the ones making decisions about your future again and they didn’t revolve around Billy. No longer would you be obsessing over what he wanted, what he was doing, if he’d like a certain thing on you or not, if he was fucking someone else or not. You wouldn’t spend hours researching Billy like you did in the past and finding out things about him that he never knew you knew. No, now you were finally free.

And it was time to move on.

Tonight was the night of the fundraising gala. Your company had purchased a table and the CEO of your company had personally extended an invite for you to attend. Based on a conversation you had with Billy three weeks ago, you knew he would also be attending to represent Anvil. When you’d first broached the subject you’d hoped he’d asked you to attend as his date – but he hadn’t. At the time you’d reassured herself the reasons were practical. It would be weird for Billy to be sitting at a competitor’s table (if he went with you) and you would risk offending your boss if you sat at Billy’s. But now you knew the truth.

So, tonight, you were dressed to the nines in a curve-hugging gold dress with a plunging neckline which emphasized all of your assets. Your heels, which cost more than the dress itself, were over five inches high and made you feel like an Amazonian goddess when you sauntered in them.

When you walked into the ballroom with Davina in your arms that night, you felt confident in a way you hadn’t in a long time.

The thing about you that a lot of people didn’t know was that you were fucking fantastic at owning a room – despite your insecurities. You may not be beautiful but you were charming. You were really great at getting strangers to open up, people were drawn to you. It was one of the reasons your CEO promoted you so quickly after a few months. Your job, initially at least, was meant to be a technical role but when you were invited to a party with potential clients you had schmoozed them so easily they had signed the contract within the week. And then you had impressed them with your actual technical skills which only cemented their positive impression of you.

So, yeah, you were in your element and you were ready to charm.

“What table are we?” Davina asked.

“14,” you said. Of course your eyes were automatically drawn to Anvil’s table on the seating chart. 157. A safe distance from your table, which meant there was a good chance you two wouldn’t even be crossing paths in the grand ballroom. You didn’t know whether to be overjoyed or disappointed.

A while later you were circulating around the north bar, chatting up with some potential clients that your boss had wanted you to pay particular attention to when you saw Dinah Madani. She was in one of those slinky, maroon satin dresses, her hair up, and you felt that surge of jealousy go through you again. She was probably here as Billy’s guest considering this wasn’t the kind of events Homeland agents typically attended.

“Y/N!” You turned to find your boss waving you towards him.

Glad for the distraction, you picked up two glasses of champagne from a nearby server and headed towards him, handing him his drink. Your boss was chatting to a group of people you vaguely recognized, but the smile on your face stiffened when you spotted Billy amongst them.

Fuck. He looked good in a tux. His hair was slicked back, and you were struck with the sharp memory of fucking him in his car one night with your fingers roughly fisting his hair. God, you loved his hair, loved running your fingers through the silky strands.

Billy’s eyebrow quirked up when he saw you and you wondered what he thought of you so dressed up. No. It didn’t matter what he thought of you. Fuck him, you reminded yourself.

“Y/N is our new Executive Director,” your boss said, introducing you to the group. “Her division has shown a significant growth ever since she joined Valiant.”

You smiled, shaking hands with everyone. When it was Billy’s turn, you reached out to clasp his hand, not betraying any emotion even though you felt an immediate charge upon touching him. He gave you an amused smile, like he was enjoying the charade.

“Nice to meet you all,” you said. “And don’t listen to Roger. Valiant was doing fine on its own.”

“But Y/N has definitely changed the way we do some of our regular operations. I didn’t realize how archaic this industry’s systems and processes were until she came along.”

“Sounds like I may need to poach Y/N from Valiant,” Billy said with a smug smile, his eyes fixed on you.

“Anvil couldn’t afford me,” you reciprocated with equal smugness.

Roger laughed, patting your arm. “We’re not giving her up without a fight.”

“Clearly,” Billy replied.

The expression on Billy’s face was new to you, you had no idea what he was thinking but you also didn’t want to waste any more of your time obsessing over him.

Roger leaned in closer, lowering his voice so others wouldn’t hear him. “Table 35. Those were the clients I told you about.” As you glanced over to the table he mentioned, your eyes met Billy’s. He was watching you intently, still with the unreadable mask on his face.

Ignoring Billy, you flashed a confident smile up at Roger. “Don’t worry about it. It’s taken care of.”

You turned back to the group, your gaze skipping past Billy’s. “It was a pleasure to meet you all. I hope you have a great evening.” Bidding everyone goodbye, you headed to Table 35.

***

An hour later you were on the terrace, enjoying the cold, crisp New York air that rattled your bone. You were exhausted. Networking took a lot out of you and now you just wanted to go home and soak in the tub. Davina, a natural extrovert, was still in the ballroom, flirting and socializing but you needed a few minutes of privacy so you had snuck outside to compose yourself.

“Congratulations on the promotion.”

Your jaw clenched as soon as you heard Billy’s voice from behind you. You turned around to look at him as he swaggered forward, closing the distance between the two of you.

“You never told me,” he remarked.

You shrugged your shoulders. “We didn’t tell each other a lot of things.”

“I get the distinct feeling you’re pissed at me but I don’t know why. Care to fill me in?”

“What reason would I have to be pissed at you?”

“You tell me. I’ve called you-”

“You’ve never called me,” you interjected.

“Fine. Texted. Whatever.” Billy took a step closer, forcing you to look up at him. Even in your fucking stilettos, he towered over you. “You’ve been avoiding me for two weeks now. Why the ghosting?”

“I just think it’s time I move on.”

Oh, Billy didn’t like that. His eyes grew darker, so dark they were almost pitch-black. “Really? You’ve got the next one lined up already?”

As much as you wanted to believe he was jealous, you knew that wasn’t the case. “We both know you don’t give a fuck about me so drop the fake jealousy bit.” You tried to walk past him but he grabbed your arm and pulled you close. You felt his angry breath skim over your skin as he glared down at you. “Let me go, Billy.”

“Why?” he snarled. “So you can go fuck Roger?”

“You really expect me to believe you’re jealous of me seeing someone else?” you snapped back. “Or is it because it’s Roger? He’s more successful than you, he’s your competitor, his company has been taking all the contracts you’ve been fighting for and now he’s got you beat in the one area you thought you excelled at. Fucking.” You angled forward on purpose, holding his gaze. “Here’s an idea. Why don’t you go fuck Roger and leave me out of it?” You smiled up at him. “Or does Madani not let you stray?”

Understanding dawned on Billy’s face. “So that’s what this is about.”

Part Two

A/N - This is my first reader insert fic. Hope you guys enjoyed it. If you’d like me to tag you, please leave a comment or DM me.

If you created this GIF, please let me know so I can give proper credit :)

#billy russo x reader #billy russo #billy russo imagine #the punisher #reader insert #ben barnes #my fics

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taechaos · 3 years

Text

Silent Treatment

from Textbook Love drabble series

pairing: bully!Jungkook x nerdy!fem!Reader

genre: drabble, smut, college au

synopsis: Why did you reject him? He’s consumed by his thoughts and theories of your behavior because you didn’t say a single word to him. If your actions were anything to go by, which apparently speak louder than words, you didn’t even want him to touch you.

warnings: slight angst, drugs, arguing, dubcon, cunnilingus, mild degredation

word count: 4.2k

tags: @mwitsmejk @1-in-abillion @kooookie

a/n: the request (contains some spoilers). i'm gonna take a very short break from this couple to write other requests!! hope u enjoy 💗

The shift in the Spring weather is unpredictable. One moment it’s chilly, and the other sunny. Humans can only adapt so much, and it causes an outbreak of common colds. Most people recover easily, handy medicine soothing their sore throats, syrups suppressing coughs, and nose sprays ridding the blockage. You, on the other hand, are not that lucky. With a weak immune system, you’re very careful to not get sick, but there must have been a slip-up because you’ve somehow lost your voice after catching a cold.

You sniffle and cough, but you can’t speak. It’s advised to not exert your vocal cords in cases like these, and that is just so unfortunate for you. The last thing you’d ever want to do is spread your sickness to Jungkook, and that meant not getting too close to him; it meant no kissing.

A very large white placard is spread out in front of you on the wooden table, and you’re plastering printed images of a specific global issue on it. You’re sitting on a bench with two of your friends as they chatter mindlessly while you work. Jungkook has a project about climate change due in a few days, and it’s supposed to be very important for his final grade. You’ve already written him a script for his presentation along with a stick prop to point at specific pictures. It’s fun, glittery and he’s going to love it.

“Hey,” Minnie, your friend, calls for you, “we’re going to get some coffee from Starbucks. Want us to get you green tea?”

Soyeon laughs when your eyes light up; it’s your favorite beverage, and it’s supposed to help with your sore throat. They leave with a smile after you give them a hyper nod and you’re alone as you adjust your woolen scarf around your neck. You need to heal as fast as you can so you’re no longer missing your beloved’s affection.

Jungkook has been feeling more inclined to approach you without reason lately, but that doesn’t mean it’s a common occurrence. Getting teased by his friend, specifically Taehyung, about having a sissy crush on a girl like yourself angered him to no end. A hit always got him to shut up, but not for long. He’s walking your way today because there’s no one around to judge him for talking to you.

You’re tearing a double-sided tape when he sits on your table, carefully avoiding your materials. Your breath hitches as his eyes gloss over your work in progress. “Working hard, I see,” he comments with disinterest. He doesn’t say anything about your efforts, but he’s impressed. The corner of his lip tugs upwards before he leans in for a kiss. You have enough self-control and concern for his well-being over your desires to lean back before your lips make contact. His face is close to yours as he pauses and slightly frowns before trying again. He receives the same results and finally pulls back.

“You did well,” he frowns at you and speaks as if you’re a child, “I’m praising you.” Your eyes are darting back and forth awkwardly and you don’t know what to do other than sit in silence. You put your hands on his knees as a resort and his frown deepens as he watches you. “I can take a hint, you know. You don’t have to fucking ignore me.” He roughly shoves your hands and stands up before storming off with a scoff. You’re torn between following him and being responsible over your belongings. You can’t let his grades go to waste because of a small misunderstanding, so you decide to text him instead. There’s always a possibility someone might steal his project. Or maybe after he’s cooled off? You delay the message, but somewhere in your heart, you’re satisfied by his reaction because it’s clear that he wanted to kiss you.

Heavy footsteps clomp against the sidewalk before Jungkook slumps on the seat next to Taehyung. It’s an isolated area for smoking students at the back of the campus, and his friend group is no exception to this role. They’re taking drags of cigarettes individually as Jungkook glares at his boots. They’re chunky and a bold black, and his dark outfit paints him as the big bad wolf. It fits, because he’s ready to attack when he’s filled with so much resentment. Why did you reject him? He’s consumed by his thoughts and theories of your behavior because you didn’t say a single word to him. If your actions were anything to go by, which apparently speak louder than words, you didn’t even want him to touch you. It doesn’t make sense, but you also grimaced at him, but then why were you doing his homework? He’s feeling frustrated, and upset all the same.

“Someone’s troubled,” Seokjin points out with a mouthful of smoke. “Kookie?”

Said boy only grunts in response.

“Did the lousy girl finally see you for who you really are and leave you?” Taehyung doesn’t hesitate to mock him with a pout. “Tragic.”

“Shut the fuck up, Tae,” Jungkook spits and sends him a death glare, fire flaming in his fierce eyes. “Go actually talk to a girl or something, and leave me alone. I can’t take your shit right now.”

The low blow doesn’t affect Taehyung in the slightest as he holds up his hands in defence with comically wide eyes. “Relax, tiger.”

“Moving on from Tae’s inability to talk to girls in broad daylight, what’s up with you Kook?” Namjoon butts in, earning a fake cough from the receiving end of the insult.

He pauses for a moment before babbling, “I hate those bitches. My mother for one, couldn’t stand wearing clothes whenever she saw a dude. Moving on from guy to guy, unless they’re a fucking asshole. What do they want? Why are they never fucking satisfied?!”

A moment of silence passes among the huddled friends before Yoongi breaks it with a joke, “Who’s the lucky girl?” It doesn’t land as Jungkook deeply sighs in response. “Did she cheat on you?” he tries again.

“No,” he murmurs.

“Then…?”

“She… I don’t fucking know, she gave me the silent treatment. She leaned away from me too,” he shakes his head with a quiet groan, “it just doesn’t add up. I got mad and left.”

“No way that could’ve ended up badly,” Taehyung chuckles but purses his lips when he’s sent another dirty look. “How long was the interaction anyway?”

“Like 30 seconds.”

“Are you coming out tonight?” Yoongi asks and puts out the burning tip of his stick. “Could help you feel better.”

“And we’ve got molly,” Namjoon adds.

“Yeah, fine, whatever.”

Alcohol’s effect on a person differs in moods, and Jungkook is usually a horny drunk. Being a sad drunk is a first for him tonight, but he’s just so confused. It made his heart drop when you outwardly refused his advances and anxiety blossomed in his chest, which he has no idea how to deal with. It kicked in fight or flight instincts, and he just… hated the idea of you not loving him, even if it’s momentary. He can’t bear staying in a situation that makes him feel so insecure, and that feeling is supposed to be left in his childhood. You just about brought out the worst in him without doing anything.

You didn’t do anything.

It’s 10PM and he’s waiting on your usual good night text that he never responds to. It’s so pathetic, and he hates himself for being so used to your affection that it worries him when he’s deprived of it. He’s never doubted your love for him, but his insecurities are churning his gut. It’s an overflow of all of his pent-up emotions, and he can’t handle it.

“Here,” Taehyung pops in out of nowhere, clutching a pill in his hand. There’s a bottle of water in the other as he holds them out for Jungkook to take. “Stop moping and get laid.”

“I’d say the same to you, but you’d probably start crying during sex,” he mumbles and uncaps the bottle before throwing in the pill and washing it down with the water. “Thanks.”

“See that girl over there?” he ignores him and steps behind his miserable friend to point at the owner of the sultry gaze directed at Jungkook from the bar. “She wants to fuck you. Or maybe me, but I’m passing her onto you.”

“How kind of you,” he sarcastically replies.

“Uh-uh, so you’re gonna be in ecstasy in about 10 minutes. Don’t fuck this up.” He slaps his shoulder before disappearing into the kitchen. It’s a lonesome party because not a lot of people are allowed in when drugs are involved. Causing a ruckus, receiving a noise complaint and then getting arrested is out of the question.

He isn’t interested in sex with a stranger - not today at least -, but he hopes for it to change as he waits to approach her. Maybe drugs will rile him up enough to have fun with someone else and rid his mind of you. It’s an annoying itch on his brain, so he rests his head against the couch to comfort himself with the soft fabric. He’s sleepy from the beer he drank earlier, and he doesn’t know how time goes by so fast when he closes his eyes.

A few minutes must have passed, because he’s starting to feel dizzy in his seat. A smile carves on his face as his mind grows slightly fogged, and he opens his eyes to find the girl quietly chatting with a friend. When she glances at him, he beckons her to come over. She mouths a “be right back” to her friend before strutting in his direction.

“Hey,” she smiles down at him before sitting on the couch. She’s aristocratic, chic and pretty. “Sorry if I weirded you out earlier.” Her voice is sweet like honey, and her words flow out of her tongue so naturally. A dream girl, really, and Jungkook is starting to get horny.

“I don’t mind,” he reassures with a subtle seductive tone, “what’s a girl like you doing with this crowd? You look too innocent.” He wraps a finger around a strand of her hair and twirls it. It feels strange.

“My friend sent me here, told me to watch over someone,” she lowly speaks. “I’m Soyeon.”

“Nice to meet you, Soyeon,” he breathes before crashing her lips with his. His hand reaches down to grip her thigh, tongue poking out to swipe the sticky gloss. It’s flavored, and it tastes of strawberry. When she kisses him back so slowly, innocently, it turns him on so much. His pants feel tight around his crotch as he runs another hand through her soft hair. Compared to him, she’s passionate whereas he’s sloppy. He’s starting to get dizzier, and it feels so fucking good, but he hates it.

There is not a single reason for him to not enjoy this, not when his mood is lifting so high. The hand on her thigh lands on her cleavage instead and she’s so submissive and shy, but something’s off. He groans into her mouth before biting her lip, ripping a whine out of her. Why does she sound so sexy and annoying?

He pulls away from her before sighing in irritation. “Fuck, I can’t do this.”

“Did I do something wrong?” she asks worriedly.

“No, just, fuck.” He starts laughing before rubbing his palms on his eyes, “I really want to fuck, but I just can’t.”

“We can just chat,” she softly suggests. “What’s your name?”

“Jungkook.”

He removes his hands from his face when she goes silent. Her eyes are wide and she’s gaping at him… guiltily? “Crap,” she hisses quietly, “I was supposed to make sure you were okay. My roommate is like, super in love with you and asked me to come here.”

He says your name in a question, wondering if it’s you. When she nods, he asks for your dorm instantly.

“She’s in room 124… Why?”

When he stands up, there’s a sway in his posture but he recovers quickly. There’s an involuntary grin on his face as he thanks her ignorantly. He’s out of the villa in a rush, and he has the overwhelming urge to just run. The campus is a bit far away from the house, but he doesn’t care as his footfalls echo in the dark streets. He has so much energy to waste, and with his current stamina, he’s confident he’ll find you before dawn. It’s stupid but it’s fun, and he doesn’t care for catching his breath as the corner stores pass by him in a blur.

Throughout the two hours of his reckless jog, where he mixed up directions multiple times, his mind is starting to clear up little by little. He’s happy because of what Soyeon told him, and he feels relieved upon seeing the familiar college building. He’s not allowed in dorms at this time, but he’s done this too many times to get caught. Except he was drunk in those instances, and being on MDMA was different. Sneaking past security was tough because he couldn’t bring himself to tiptoe without making so much noise. When they glanced at him, he thought it to be the only choice to just run past them. He’s in the elevator by the time they catch on, and the numbers look wonky in his eyes but he presses the button for the right floor.

He’s shifting his weight repeatedly in an attempt to contain his excitement; he wants to see you so bad. The moment he hears the ding of the elevator, he’s running past the halls and stops upon seeing 124. He has to squint, but he knows this is your dorm.

You wake up with a silent gasp when there’s a pound on the door. You clutch your sheets in fear until someone starts to sing your name. “Jungkook?” you mouth to yourself. You stand up and look through the peephole and there’s a man on the other side who’s bouncing on his feet impatiently.

“Open up,” he sings loudly. You’re worried when you swing the door open and yank him inside so he doesn’t wake up any other students. You try to talk but only a wheeze comes out, so you switch on the light to see him instead. The brightness hurts your eyes as you close them for a few seconds. “Well, well, well, look who we have here…”

He starts to circle around you slowly and stumbles behind you. “Sending people to spy on me after rejecting me like that.” His words are slightly slurred and you turn around to face him with a pout. You point at your throat to give him a hint, but his eyes don’t waver from your pleading ones. “What are your intentions, huh?” he weakly pushes you, “Sending me mixed signals. Who- who do you think you are?”

You hold his hands and place them on your neck, trying to communicate with him by mouthing, “I’m sick,” but he only chuckles. He seems sickeningly joyous, but he’s not over his anger. “Still not going to talk to me? What did I even do?”

You deeply inhale from your nose because he’s not paying attention to you. You’re frustrated with yourself until he yells, “WHY WON’T YOU TALK TO ME?” The surge of serotonin, his state of euphoria is crashing down on him the more you ignore him. He had believed the drug would only make him happy, but it intensified his sadness and anxiety just as much when he saw you. It helped him forget you in a social circle, but you confused him so much after he was reassured for so long - coupled with your silence, he’s raging.

“Why are you ignoring me?! What did I do that was so bad that you can’t bear talking to me anymore? You told me you loved me, please,” he chokes and tries to swallow the lump in his throat. “I-I’ll make it up to you, I’m so sad right now. Just say something…”

You’re watching him in shock and a hint of fear from his fluctuating mood. You want to cry at how pitiful he looks, but instead you aim to grab a piece of paper from your bedside table. He misreads your actions and pushes you against the wall. “Stop this. Stop!” He has your arms pinned and he’s trying so hard to intimidate you so you give in. A dry sob leaves you because he's going mad, but then he has a sudden epiphany. “Maybe you’ll love me again if I fuck you hard enough and engrave it in your brain that you’re mine. Yes, yes!”

He starts unbuckling his belt and you immediately try to stop him; he’ll get sick! He shoves you again and pulls down his jeans before mashing his mouth against yours. All of your efforts have gone to waste when his tongue forces its way down your throat. There’s no point to denying him now, so you hesitantly kiss him back. You’re so guilty, and he’s so careless as he roughly pushes his hand down your white cotton shorts. You’re wearing a navy blue sweater to match so you don’t get cold in the night, but the shorts are meant to prevent a fever. What’s the point now, then? He hasn’t even read your texts that you only remembered to send before sleeping. He missed a whole paragraph of your explanation and confronted you so angrily.

“I’m going to fuck you all night,” he growls against your lips, “then you’ll remember how much you love me.” Your moans are quiet and hitched as he presses down on your clit through your panties. His other hand is on his cock as he strokes it eagerly, ready to get inside you. “I missed you so fucking much in one day,” he whispers in a croak. Hearing it makes you feel even warmer inside as you nudge his hand to urge him to enter you. “You missed me too, huh?” he takes notice of your neediness. “Shouldn’t have fucking brought it upon yourself then.”

He removes his hand from your shorts and taps your thighs before demanding, “Jump.” You bite your lip in consideration until he taps them harder and you quickly wrap your legs around his waist. Your shorts are relatively short, resembling loose boxers, so when your back is pressed against the wall he only pushes them and your underwear to the side before thrusting into you. A scream gets caught in your throat, and you forget all about your aches as he roughly fucks into you without caring for protection or lube. It stings only slightly, but the pleasure in feeling so full of him outweighs the pain.

Jungkook is moaning and groaning as he bruises your thighs in his hold. Your panting is all he can catch, and though the feeling of you is an amplified sensation because of the drug coursing in his system, he wants to hear you chant his name as well. “Still quiet?” he tuts and carries you to your narrow bed and you cling onto his shoulder while trying to catch your breath after the sudden attack. “Your cunt is throbbing though,” he says as he pulls out of you and drops you on the bed. He manhandles you by flipping you on your stomach and holds up your ass. He finally takes off your bottom clothing, but he’s slightly dizzy as he yanks them off your ankles. He spreads your thighs apart and you’re on your knees with your head against the mattress. “I wonder why that is,” he says before slapping your pussy, making you whimper quietly. “So wet, yet you don’t even make a sound. Some whore you are.” You purse your lips and muster a whine, but it’s interrupted when he pistons his cock inside you without warning. Your sounds are hoarse as he pounds into you from the back, hands kneading your ass to the shape of his hands. He gives it a spank as he moans loudly; the new position makes it feel so much more intense, and Jungkook loves it. His ears finally get to hear your pathetic mewls as he thrusts so deeply inside you that your vision blurs with tears and your eyes roll to the back of your skull. You feel like a doll that can’t speak or move, and he’s evidently enjoying it going by his rushed pace. You’re challenging him with your silence, and he loves proving himself.

All of a sudden however, he stops moving. You look behind you with a pout and he quirks a brow at you. You grit your teeth because you know he's waiting for you to tell him to continue, or rather daring you to do something. A sudden surge of confidence overcomes you and you gently slam your hips against his, fucking yourself on his cock with your eyes screwed shut.

“Yes, baby,” he strains, “show me that you're still my good girl.” At his encouragement, you meet his thrusts faster and you're seeing stars at how amazing it feels. You want to be his good girl so bad, and you arch your back to savour the pleasure. “Your pussy is mine, all mine,” he affirms to himself and stills your hips to turn you around without removing his length. His fingers are digging into your flesh and your tits bounce under the fabric as he rams into you restlessly. Your mouth is open in a silent scream and he can barely make out your pupils, the whites of your eyes stirring his climax at how attractive you look under the poor lighting. “I love you so fucking much,” he cries, “say it back, baby.”

You try to, but you can only dryly cough. “You fucking bitch,” he hisses at your defiance and pulls out of you to pump his length. He’s close to his release, and he pushes up your sweater to see your hard nipples that make him salivate. He crawls to slide his cock between the valley of your breasts and it hurts when he harshly pushes them together. “Stick out your tongue,” he commands in a whisper, and you do so while panting like a dog. Every time he thrusts upwards, the tip of his head grazes your tongue and leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. He’s massaging your tits as he stutters between whines, and eventually his load spurts out to land on your chest and cheek with a particularly loud groan. His cum surges down his shaft as he rides out his high with the last slow thrusts.

“Oh fuck,” he sighs airily and collapses next to you in the tiny space available. You clumsily turn on your side to give him more room and he pecks your swollen lips. He zips his pants back up and you’re still naked from the waist down. You’re staring at each other adoringly in the romantic, fragile atmosphere; another first.

“I love you,” you croak finally. It’s quieter than a whisper, and it makes you cringe at how hideous you sound; it’s painful as well.

His face lights up once he registers your words before noticing the tone. “What happened to your voice?”

“Sick.” You can’t bring yourself to say anything more as you snuggle into his side and he instinctively wraps an arm around your shoulders.

“Shit,” he murmurs, “why didn’t you tell me that sooner, idiot?”

You slap a hand on his front pocket where his phone is, and he hastily takes it out to see a bunch of notifications from you. “You sent it at night, you’re still the idiot.” You giggle and roll your eyes. “A promise is a promise, though,” he purrs before cupping your bare heat. “I did say I would fuck you all night.” You widen your eyes when his head lowers down to face your sopping wet cunt, and he slowly licks up a stripe over your soaked folds, making you shudder and grip his hair. He’s leaving kitty licks all over your sensitivity, the tip of his tongue lightly brushing against your clit every now and then. Your hips lift involuntarily, and he finally takes your clit in his mouth and sucks on it loudly. He slurps your arousal before spitting it back on your hood, and you can only squeak in response. Your hazed mind only tells you that you want more, and he doesn’t fail to provide.

Two fingers enter your clenching hole, and he’s scissoring your walls as he messily eats you out. The pleasure from earlier returns all too soon and you know you won’t be able to last long. His lids are hooded when you glance down at him and the way he’s looking at you makes it even harder to resist your orgasm. The knot in your stomach picks back up right before unraveling and your moan is raspy as you start twitching under his relentless mouth. He grows gentle and leaves kisses all over your vulva until your body falls limp on the sheets.

After another round of penetrative sex, the two of you fall asleep from exhaustion in your bed. It’s a first for the both of you, and Jungkook decides in his drunken mind that tonight won’t be the last. It feels so intimate when he cuddles you, and you won’t ever forget his love confession.

The next morning is not so pleasant however, as Jungkook wakes up with a loud sneeze and in his now nasal voice says, “God fucking damn it.”

#bts imagines #bts scenarios #bts smut #bts x reader #jeon jungkook #jungkook smut #jjk smut #jungkook imagines #jungkook x reader #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook smut #jungkook scenarios #bts fic #jungkook fic

751 notes · View notes

patchworkpuzzle · 3 years

Note

~Rainbow Anon.

Henlo, hope things are aight! I just woke up to some more Puppygirl thoughts and wanted to request a Katsuki, Mirio, and whoever as your third (separate) having a s/o that's a Puppygirl that hasn't been praised by her ex at all, and they're MadTM about it, because how can anybody /not/ praise her? She's perfect and deserves all of the praise!

Oh. My. Goodness. YES I CAN WRITE THIS FOR YOU!!! I made Kirishima the third person..... cause reasons.... 😖

MINORS DNI 18+

Word count: 1.6k

Paring(s): Bakugou, Mirio, Kirishima x F!Reader

Warnings: puppy play kink, squirting, dirty talk, oral (both male and female receiving), loooottttss of praise.

Authors Note: so because this is dealing with reader having praise issues, that can be somewhat triggering to some, though I don’t go into detail about it I still just wanna put that out there! Also... I hope this is good enough for you, Rainbow Anon!

When you first brought it up, he was confused. You wanted to be treated like a puppy? Wear a muzzle? Bark? All that stuff?

You had to calm him down. Telling him it doesn’t and didn’t have to be that extreme. Just wearing the ears, tail, and collar, and being told what to do was really all you wanted.

Well that certainly got his attention.

Needless to say, it didn’t take him long to get into it.

That’s how you ended up on your knees, settling comfortably between his spread-out legs, sucking him off. The sounds of your collar jingling, ringing faster the more adamant you work, and his groans were filling the air around you.

Every now and then he would talk to you, saying absolute FILTH as he tugs on your hair to take ‘deeper, all the way in, yeah just like that. Good, good girl.’

The praise, whenever he gave it, was making you shift uncomfortably, not the “I want to touch myself’ uncomfortable, and letting out small whines of displeasure

You’ve now done it a few times and he’s had enough.

After the last whine hums around him, he pulls your hair to take you off him. Bluntly asking you what the hell was wrong.

You couldn’t keep his intense gaze, instead shifting your eyes to the floor as you state that you’re not used to the praise. That your ‘ex wasn’t exactly keen on giving it to me, so now when it happens I get a little uncomfortable’

Your apology after you explain makes him scoff, he’s not mad at you though. He makes it clear when he tells you not to apologize for something like that.

Internally he is pissed, absolutely irate over the fact that your scumbag of an ex wouldn’t give you any semblance of praise, that you so clearly deserve to have. I mean look at you! You deserve to be told just how amazing you are, and what a fantastic job you’re doing!

But he doesn’t let it show. Externally he just puts on an evil smirk and picks you up from the floor, throwing you over his shoulder as he carries you to your bedroom. Ignoring you squirming and questioning until he throws you onto the mattress.

Before you had the chance to get up he slaps your ass, pinning your shoulders down as he pulls your hips up. Growling in your ear, he tells you he’s ‘gonna give you all the praise you deserve’

You cry out, cumming yet again, your release gushing out of you and onto the sheets as he gives you a groan over it, slapping your clit to make more gush out. Your body becomes sore at the position he has you pinned in; refusing to let you move an inch.

You whimper at his touch, and whine when his pace is still unrelenting as his hips snap into your backside.

“Fuck yeah, puppy. Look at you gushing around me like a dumb bitch in heat. You like that huh? Like how your perfect cunt keeps squeezing me…. So tight!”

He leans his head down, biting your shoulder as he growls yet again at how you clench around him, clearly enjoying what he’s saying.

“Yeah just like. Such a good puppy slut, making me feel so good. Gonna cum deep into you, and you’re gonna take it all. Like the good girl you are, right? Like the perfect puppy you are.”

You cry out a yes, unable to tell him different, unable to find any fault in his praise when he fucks so good.

He was into it the moment you brought it up when your relationship first started getting sexual. Of course, you could be his good girl! He would want nothing more!

Now, you’re in his lap. It started innocent enough, just wanting to cuddle you close as you watch some TV, but it didn’t take long for it to end up with you humping his thigh.

His grip on your hips is tight, as he guides you up and down the expanse of his thighs, flexing his muscles to get you panting all pretty for him. Enjoying how you mewl a little when your clit makes contact every now and then.

He’s telling you how pretty you look, and what a good job you’re doing, and how good of a girl you are at listening to him while getting off on his thigh.

You tried to keep your voice down, but a sad whimper comes out anyway after his praise washes over you. You’re hoping he doesn’t notice, but of course he does.

He halts all movement, bringing his hands up to cup your face. A look of worry on his face as he asks you what’s wrong.

You bury your head in the crook of his neck, sniffling as you tell him it's not true; that you’re not a good girl. Your ex never told you before so what he’s saying right now must not be true

Mirio is totally devastated by your answer, but still tries to brighten the mood and make you feel better. He reassures you, telling you that all he said is true and how perfect you are for him as he plants so many kisses all over you as he holds you close.

He says sweet truths about you, and telling you because you’re so wonderful is the reason why he says them all the time cause they’re true and he’s just gotta tell you

He’ll remind you as often as he can now at just how perfect you are.

“That’s it, just like that. Look at you! You’re doing so good, puppy!”

You let out a mewl that is almost a sob as you slowly, inch by inch, seat yourself down on his cock. The girth stretching your walls almost painfully as you try to take all of him in. Curling in on yourself as you hide your face into his neck, allowing him to finish slowly pushing you down all the way.

“Good girl” He groans when he finally bottoms out, slowly raising your hips up and down to help adjust you to his size “Taking me so well in this perfect pussy of yours. Feels so good, puppy, no one but you can make me feel this way.”

You whine at his, trying to lift your hips to go faster. In an attempt to get him to stop praising you or to cum faster, you wouldn’t know. But what you do know is that you let out a sob when he slows you down, grinding you slowly on top of him.

“Ah ah, puppy. Slow down. Can’t go too fast, I want to savor every last perfect inch of you, okay?”

And well, you’re his good little girl so you let him do as he wants.

When you told him that you wanted to try something different, he didn’t know what to expect but was excited, nonetheless.

When he came home the next day to find you sitting on your knees waiting for him at the front door, lingerie, tail, ears, and collar on. Well, this man became beet RED.

He doesn’t stay flustered for long though, quickly picking you up and running to your bedroom to get things going. You giggle at his excitement and enthusiasm as he quickly sheds you both of your clothing, making sure to keep your accessories one cause god damn

Before long you’re in a mating press, unable to stop wailing and crying out as he pounds harshly into your drooling cunt.

He’s way more into it than you both thought as he leans himself further onto you to whisper some dirty praise into your ear. Telling you that ‘you’re taking my cock so well, aren’t you? Atta girl, yeah, keep squeezing me like that with your perfect cunt. You’re my perfect puppy, aren’t you?’

His praise was making you feel dizzy, but not in the happy high feeling. More like you’re falling in your dreams, that weird twist in your gut that was one out of pleasure was turning into one of guilt.

You whimper out a quiet ‘no’ and that immediately made his hips stuttered to a stop. It was so out of character for you, in this moment and ones previously, that he couldn’t help but nervously ask what was wrong.

You tell about the praise he just gave you. How, due to previous partners (mainly your most recent ex), that you aren’t used to it. That it makes you feel guilty for him to tell you those things.

He responds by immediately putting your legs down and pulling you upright to sit in his lap, holding you close. Petting your hair, he tells you that your ex was wrong. Dumb and downright stupid for not thinking you anything less then the perfect girl you are.

In fact, why doesn’t he try and make you believe it right now?

“P-please!” You blubber out, trying to pull his head from away from your cunt as your nth orgasm was approaching. The feeling almost painful now, as the pleasure was too intense. “No more!”

“Not yet, puppy.” He chuckled at your feeble attempt “You weren’t being too nice to yourself earlier, so now you gotta take you punishment.”

You just sob at his comment, knowing you are unable to deter him from doing as he pleased. Shaking violently and screaming out into your bedroom when you cum over his face yet again, no longer embarrassed but the sucking and slurping sounds that come from him as he slurps up your release like a man starved.

“God, you taste so sweet puppy. Look at how pretty your pussy is” He rubs at your clit once more, making you keen loudly “Being such a good girl for making such a mess for me, for gushing for me…”

He takes a lick up your folds once again, smirking at your twitching legs.

“Now come one, be a good girl for your master and come one more time?”

#bakugou katsuki #bakugou #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugou x reader #mirio togata #mirio #mirio x reader #eijirou kirishima #kirishima #kirishima x reader #kirishima eijiro x reader #bakugou smut #mirio smut #kirishima smut #test test test test test #for you #my sweet rainbow anon 🌈

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glowingbadger · 3 years

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Hi it’s me, crawling through the window. Would it be possible to get a crumb of arranged marriage w/ Hubert? His line w/ Dorothea about being willing to get married for politics sake has fueled my brain rot for him.

Good God I need to secure my windows-

I mean HELLO FRIEND ANON YES IT WOULD BE MY PLEASURE

Lol actually though, I have been thinking about this for Hubie since we all started chatting about that arranged marriage stuff! I think it's a perfect concept for him~

This like... got weird while I was writing it though?? Idk man hahaha it ended up on the less-spicy side of what I usually write, and with some very weird dialogue in places... Idk, I hope y'all like it. Maybe if there's interest, I'll follow this up eventually with a more smut-focused piece?

I've been traveling and working so much lately that I just don't even know what writing is anymore or how it works hahaha

TW: A brief mention of non-con

Hubert (FE3H) x Reader ("wife," neutral pronouns)

Arranged Marriage - semi spicy i guess?

"Frankly, he's a pain," Linhardt must be able to see your surprise and confusion written across your face. He goes on, "He's reliable and capable, of course, but also the most persistent nag you'll ever meet. Actually, no-" he glances upward as though to cross reference his own thoughts, "No, her Majesty is worse. But Hubert is a close second to be sure. Always on and on about sleep schedules and proper nutrition and etiquette..." He sighs and closes the massive tome on his lap, as though to close the conversation with it, "frankly, he's an insufferable mother hen. Does that help?"

"Well, it's... Not what I expected," you admit with a shrug, "but thank you all the same."

It's been several weeks since the papers binding you in marriage to Hubert Von Vestra had been signed- and this alone had sufficed. No ceremony, no grand ball, just paperwork and a handshake with your father. A handshake that ensured that, even under the Empire's unification, he would maintain nominal control over his considerable portion of land, and in return, would swear absolute loyalty to her Majesty. It was a beneficial arrangement for all parties, and you were not ignorant to the part you played. You were hardly even a bargaining chip- moreso, a hostage.

Your new husband had made no secret of what manner of harm may befall you if your family were to renege on their deal. Fortunately, you know your father to be a reliable coward, so you have no reason to believe he would be bold enough to step out of line.

Hubert Von Vestra is a terrifying man. A zealously loyal man of storied cruelty and a frigid disposition. His frame looms over you whenever he's near, and though he's hardly placed a finger on you since you'd been given over to him, his mere presence is... arresting. There's a sort of charisma to him that's equal parts frightening and fascinating. Perhaps it's madness brought on by your circumstances, but you can't help wanting to glimpse just the slightest bit into that brilliant, ever churning mind.

Unsurprisingly, he has been resistant to your attempts to understand him. He hardly indulges you in small talk, and if you were the paranoid sort, you'd think he intentionally makes himself busy when you're around. Eventually, perhaps out of sheer stubbornness, you'd settled on a routine of bringing coffee to his study adjoined to your bedroom in the evenings. He'd been visibly surprised the first time. It wasn't until the fourth night that he'd given a curt "thank you." About two weeks in, he'd actually sat back in his chair and laid down his quill pen to receive the cup from your hands. After a month, he'd leveled his narrow gaze at you and said,

"I cannot begin to fathom what satisfaction you glean from playing 'maid' to me."

"Well, I, uhm," you hadn't expected him to address you so directly, but you managed to say, "You... work so hard, I wanted to do something for you, I suppose."

His expression is inscrutable as he replies,

"You are aware that my work was much the same before you arrived."

"I am," you say softly, "But- all the same..." you trail off, and Hubert seems content to let the matter rest. And so you leave him be amidst his reports and correspondence, coffee at his side on the desk. Yet for as unproductive as your exchange might have seemed, it does leave you with an idea. The thought to learn about the man from those who knew him long before your arrival at the capitol.

Your investigation into the true character of your husband does not stop with Linhardt. In fact, his testimony only leaves you with further questions. But perhaps the others would say otherwise; perhaps the United Empire's most up and coming crest scholar simply inspires maternal behavior. This has to be the case- you simply can't imagine that the notoriously ruthless heir of the even more notorious Vestra lineage would be so... Doting.

And yet the more you learn of him, the more contradictory he seems.

Caspar's take is much like Linhardt's- a picture of a man far closer to a school marm than any assassin or master of torture. Ferdinand seems both smitten and incensed by him, oscillating wildly between the two. Then eventually, to your shock, Bernadetta takes the initiative to speak to you about Hubert of her own accord.

"I'm, uh, really so-sorry to bother you!" she approaches with arms drawn close to her chest and eyes resolutely avoiding yours, "I- I just heard that you were... asking about Hubert, so, I, uh..."

It takes some time to prompt her further. You assure her again and again- no, this isn't intrusive at all- yes, you'd very much like to hear her perspective- no, you're not mad at her. In truth, you're endlessly intrigued about what a gentle soul like Bernadetta would have to say about a man feared across the continent. Finally, she manages,

"He's... actually really kind!" she blurts out, as though the words would abandon her if she gave them the window of opportunity. Your eyebrows raise slightly.

"You think so..?"

"Yes, completely-!" she stammers, "I know he's super, super scary, and powerful and spooky and cold and, uh, all of that. But still," her voice falters as she continues, "He only scolds people when they do something dangerous. And he only hurts people to protect others. I... I know he's done some te-terrible things. But... he's always been nice to Bernie," finally, she meets your eyes with an imploring look in hers, "So, uh, I'm really grateful to him. And I think it would be really nice for someone to reach out to him. If... if that's not too weird or anything. For you."

You smile warmly and nod,

"Thank you, Bernadetta. I know it can't be easy for you to come to me with all of this, but... I'd like to try, if I can."

The opportunity doesn't come in the way you expect.

At first, it seems the night will proceed like many others before. You bring a cup of coffee to your husband's desk, setting it down quietly so as to not disturb him. He's silent, but this is common enough, so you head back to the bedroom to undress for the evening. All nights prior, he would lay beside you long after you'd settled in, then rise to resume work in the morning before you woke up- all the while never allowing your bodies to interact in any way.

Tonight, just as you're about to close the door to Hubert's study behind you, long fingers catch around your wrist, visibly startling you.

It's the most physical contact you've had to-date, but he only says,

"One moment."

You whip around to face him, a touch of anxiety evident in your eyes. It's clear in his own that he notices, but if anything, he only seems amused. He steps forward, his taller frame menacing you as he speaks,

"I understand that you have been busying yourself with some manner of investigation as of late."

It takes a moment for his meaning to reach you. When it does, your face burns and you can't bring yourself to meet his scrutinizing gaze,

"Oh, uhm..."

"I assure you, my dearest wife," he says with barely concealed venom, "anything that I do not wish for you to know will be kept from you. Aside from which, your efforts thus far have proven amateurish at best."

Something seems off about his tone. You could understand if he felt uncomfortable or hesitant about your efforts to learn about him, but this seems far more grave, more... business-like. He steps towards you once more, and you step back in turn. Yet before long, you feel your legs bump the edge of the bed. A gloved hand trails a fingertip down your jawline to your chin, then urges you to look up at him.

"Whatever you are planning, my dear, I promise it will be fruitless. You had best rethink how you spend your days before your actions bring you to harm."

"No, I-" your brow creases deeply, your face burns, your body burns hotter and you don't want to consider why, "I've just been trying to learn about you as a person, nothing else. We're- we're married, after all, so..."

He gives an abrupt, dry laugh.

"Ah, so I am to believe that you've been interrogating my allies out of some misguided affection, is that it?"

"Hubert, just listen to me!" for a moment, you feel bolstered, defiant, and you straighten your posture, "You won't tell me the first thing about you- the only way to learn so much as your favorite color is to ask someone who's known you for a decade!"

Briefly, he does seem to consider your words. But his eventual reply is as aloof as any prior,

"If you're no spy or politician, then you're worse- a fool." he says, and before you can respond, he's seized both of your wrists and pushed you back onto the bed. For a moment, the room spins and your voice leaves you. A shrewd eye watches you with cruel condescension as he pins you against the sheets.

"I should think that you'd be well aware what I'm capable of," he nearly whispers, "I personally ensured that the rumors spread through your father's territory and further still. Do you think that anyone would even dare lift a finger to help you if I chose to seek retribution for this recent behavior?" He draws nearer, his grip tighter at your wrists, "Perhaps as punishment, I'll simply take my pleasure from you by force."

Your lips tighten, you take a breath. Then, meeting his gaze directly, you reply,

"You won't."

His visible eye narrows.

"And what evidence do you have to prompt such unfounded confidence? Perhaps you have crafted a flattering falsehood of me in your mind," a mocking smirk curls his lips, "Am I a misunderstood sentimental sort to you, then? A sad, lonely man for you to save?"

You scowl, though you suspect it looks more like a pout to him.

"I don't know what I think of you yet- not completely. But I don't pity you like that, and I don't think you're sad or lonely. I know you're not."

For the first time, it seems that you've caught him off guard. That frigid mask falters for just a moment, and you go on before he can replace it,

"You're surrounded by people who care about you. I've seen it for myself. Whatever you've had to do in the service of your ideals- it hasn't kept the people around you from wanting to know and understand you, even if it's despite you."

Hubert is silent for a moment. His gaze bores into you like he thinks he'll discover some hidden layer if he can just keep digging. Then, he sighs,

"How did I ever become bound to such a troublesome spouse..."

When you wrest your arms from his grasp, his hands fall away with little resistance, and you think that perhaps he had never truly intended to keep you in place by force to begin with. He moves to leave the bed, but your fists find the front of his clothing and tug him back down to you.

You press your lips to his without hesitation, and you can feel him inhale sharply, his entire body rigid above you. His lips are surprisingly soft, his scent like coffee and old parchment, and though your heart threatens to burst from your chest, you hold firmly to him by his clothes. Near imperceptibly, he leans down against you, and your fear, along with any remaining doubts, begin to dissolve. Knowing he won't pull away, you let your hands relax against him, running up his chest where you can feel his own pulse pounding. It's so human, so entirely reasonable and normal. Now, at last, Hubert Von Vestra is merely a man of flesh and bone.

Your tongue meets his naturally, your lips parting in time with his as your kiss deepens to a fevered pace. One hand reaches that sharp, handsome jawline, reveling in the erotic sensation of his mouth moving against yours. And yet, all the while, his hands remain staunchly on the bed beside you. He doesn't touch you- doesn't even let his body meet yours.

It's impossible to tell whether passion or madness drives you to bring your teeth to his lower lip, a single insistent bite communicating desire mounting faster than you can contain. And for a moment, you sense something new; a sound catches in Hubert's throat, a reaction he fights to stifle. Then, he pulls away. His pale skin is tinted a rare shade of pink, and his hair is ruffled out of place enough to reveal both narrowed eyes. His cloak has spilled around his frame to surround you both, and somewhere in your frazzled mind, you imagine that you're caught in some beautiful, velvet-lined trap.

"I- must... return to my work." Hubert says stiffly. He pushes up from you and turns away, leaving you still flustered on the bed behind him. You sit upright, holding your arms tight around your body as you watch him straighten his hair and clothes.

"You, uhm..." your face reddens still as you search for the right words, "you could... join me in bed, if you liked."

Hubert turns to the door of his study, speaking without daring to even glance your way,

"Anything that you offer to me now will be born from the impulse to survive. I have been bargained with before." His shoulders slack just slightly, his voice low and sober, "The proudest nobleman will even sell off his own child to a monster if he feels it will spare him its teeth."

You open your mouth to protest, then shut it without a word. You feel that you know your mind and heart, even in this moment, but you lack the words to convince a man like this. In a feeble attempt, you murmur,

"You don't frighten me, Hubert. Not anymore."

He half turns toward you, though his hand remains on the handle of his study door.

"You yourself said that you do not know what you think of me," he says, "As such, I will not lay a hand on you until the day that you do."

You stare down at your hands in your lap, barely registering the sound of the door clicking shut as he leaves you in the bedroom. No matter how you try to sort out your tangled thoughts, the memory of his lips on yours won't leave them. If anything, it eclipses any sense of reason, standing resolutely in the way of your path to clarity. Letting out a groaning sigh, you fall onto your back on the bed, staring blankly at the ceiling as if it could offer you any advice.

What do I think about my own husband? You wonder, the thought nearly enough to make you laugh. Well for one, he's a pain.

#hubert von vestra #hubert x reader #fire emblem #feh #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem x reader #fire emblem imagines #fire emblem fic #x reader

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rezzyromance · 3 years

Note

Imagine reader having a bad day. She just rants and raves and doesn’t shut the hell up.

Karl is busy trying to work and reader is starting to get on his nerves because he can’t concentrate (while finding her rants low-key cute).

In a moment of madness + frustration, he pushes back his chair, storms over to her and kisses her. He’ll say he did it to shut you up but the really he’s been wanting to do that for a long time.

Need me a guy like this.

You had been ranting for who knows how long. Today, it felt like everything that could possibly go wrong went wrong. And, sadly, the only person who was available for you to vent to was Karl. Beloved Karl. It wasn't often he let you interrupt his work so you can talk, let alone complain about things he found rather silly. He felt bad for you due to the frustrated state you were in which is why he agreed in the first place. Now, he's barely gotten any work done as you both sat in his office space.

"And then, this lady at the village looked at me weird. She just kept staring and she scrunched her nose at me as if she was looking at something revolting!", you had been pacing back in forth during the whole rant. Karl was trying to draw out some blueprints, but seeing you pace around back and forth in the corner of his eye kept interrupting. It wasn't as distracting as your words though. You were so flustered and aggravated. While he was growing aggravated as well, he began to find your anger cute.

"And guess what? When I went to the Duke today, HE DIDN'T HAVE WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR! CAN YOU BEIEVE IT?", you threw your arms up in disbelief. "Nope.", he responds with a sigh as he made a tiny adjustment to his barely progressed work. "I was looking for some specific berries. Luckily, the book Donna gave me about the local wildlife said I could find them on bushes. I found the bushes, but there weren't any berries! They're out of season!", you continued to complain, not even checking to see if he was a actively listening. You just kept on until it was all finally of your chest.

"And after that, I tried to fix that chair with the broken leg in the bedroom, and I broke it more! How did I even do that!?', your pacing began to pick up speed. "No clue.", he says bluntly. The pencil he was holding in his hand was about to snap under the pressure he was gripping it with. His other hand was place on his head, propping it up as he rested his elbow on his desk with a growing pissed expression.

"And one of the lycans had a bad cut, so I tried to give it some bandages and the damn thing nearly bit my hand off! I thought you trained those things!", the image of you trying to help an injured lycan and failing drifted around in his head. It was almost as funny as it was distracting. He was fighting a smile that was creeping up on his face. While he found your efforts to help the creature cute, he was still frustrated that his time was seemingly being wasted.

He sat up straight and took a good hard look at the blueprint in front of him. The first picture was barely sketched out. It was covered in eraser shavings from the amount of times he messed up. And, upon further inspection, he could see where he was writing a description for something and accidentally began to write down things that you were saying as he struggled to multitask. The sight of this made his brow furrow and his jaw clench. All of his efforts for his work for the past unknown amount of time were useless.

"And Donna invited me to another tea party, but I can't deal with Angie. I mean I know Donna loves her, but that piece of plastic is fucking nuts and it makes me so uncomfortable.", you continued to rant about the doll. He didn't know if he wanted to correct you and tell you that she's porcelain and not plastic. All he knew is how much he missed the silence of his office now. Although, there was something about you running around in circles while wildly throwing your hands up in frustrated fits of rage that he found adorable.

Finally, he knew he had enough. He knew he had to do something if he wanted to finish his work. He sighed and put down the pencil he was using to draw out some blueprints. He looks over, preparing to tell you to shut up, but he couldn't help but get distracted. You were talking with your hands. And, you kept running your hands through your hair, making messier and messier as your pointless ranting went on and on.

He didn't even notice he was staring until you made eye contact with him and stopped. 'Are you listening to me?" "Yes.", he lies. And with that, your pacing continues as you spout more and more bullshit. His feelings confused him. You were keeping him from being productive and nothing you were upset about had any real long term meaning, but you just looked so cute when you're all riled up. His work laid on his desk, practically screaming to be finished.

"Oh right...", he turned back to his work in hopes to finish it. "And Alcina said I need to think more about what I wear because I care more about how comfortable my clothes are compared to how they look. Isn't that just bitchy?" "Mhm." The mentioning of her caused his eyes to roll. "Please just stop please just stop please just stop please just stop", repeated through his head as he wished for peace and quiet. He accidentally broke his pencil in his tense and clutched hands.

Finally, he had had enough. He threw the broken pencil pieces to the ground and stood up, shoving his chair to the side before marching over towards you. You didn't even notice until his fingers were tangled in your hair, turning your face towards his. He then pulls you into a kiss that lasts a couple of seconds. Enough for him to release some of his energy in a not so aggressive way while also getting you to be quiet for a bit.

You were speechless when he pulled away and he was thankful. "What was that for?', you ask as you smile and grab him by the coat sleeve, tugging on it. He pulls it out of your grasp, but not too aggressively. "Just wanted to shut you up for a goddamn second." "Oh yeah? Well what if I keep talking?" A mischievous smile spreads on your face as he looks back at you with a growing frustrated expression, but you could spot a small smile curling upwards from the corners of his mouth. "Nope.", he picks you up and throws you over his shoulder, carrying you out the door. Once you're out the door, he puts you down. "Don't interrupt my works again. And, for the love of god, stop caring so much about what other people think. " You open your mouth to object to his decision on kicking you out, but he kisses you again. This time, you can feel him smile into it. He truly just wanted to kiss you again. "Now, leave me alone for a second. When I'm finished, you can tell me about all the other pointless bullshit from your day." And with that, he closes the door. While having you away is less distracting, he still can't help but think of you as he works, the taste of you still lingering on his lips. "Better get this done fast."

#re8 #resident evil village #resident evil 8 #karl heisenberg x you #karl heisenberg headcanons #karl heisenberg headcanon #karl heisenberg #karl heisenberg x reader #karl heisenberg fanfic #karl heisenburg x reader #k

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bibbykins · 3 years

Text

Cookies and Fingertips (M)

Some Jimin loving! We love to see it! I hope you all enjoy this installation as I try to figure out how to properly flesh out characters in a drabble series. Am not sure how I’m doing there but I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless. As always, tips are not required but greatly appreciated, just like your thoughts! Pls share your thoughts though, they brighten my day!

Note: This is part of a drabble series The Household’s Bunny

Summary: You and Jimin met long before you moved in, and yet, you’re not sure if he even likes you. So what else is there to do but take every opportunity to talk to him until you figure it out?

Jimin has had a debilitating crush on you long before you moved in and he is almost positive there is no way you’d feel the same. And yet, he doesn’t have the strength to properly avoid you.

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: 18+, soft yandere-ish, obsessive thoughts, possessive thoughts, fingering, handjob, subspace, cum eating (sorta?), discussion of hospitalization, mentions of a stalker, mentions of passing out, the word “fat” is used, a moment of thigh riding, surprise kiss, insecurity

Jimin looked across the courtyard as his eyes remained fixated on your form. You were a simple second year in college and he was just a breath away from graduating. He first laid eyes on you a mere year ago and he can't remember what life was truly like before you smiled at him. You both had only ever exchanged pleasantries, so he opted to wait for the right time to make his move.

“That’s not true.” Your voice snapped Jimin from his staring contest with the PowerPoint slides, “That’s an antiquated idea, not a proven theory.” He looked to you, a couple rows down. You were plump and cute to say the least. He recognized you from a few of his courses. He had heard you were a double major in Art and… damn, what was the other?

The man you had rebutted had his face turning red, “It is proven, it was studied in 1973 with significant results yielded.” Jimin had no idea what you both were debating but he watched a sea of student nod in agreeance with you, some with the guy. What class was he even in? He looked at the PowerPoint slides, reading them for the first time today. Ah, he was in his psych of gender class. Maybe you were a psych major.

“In 1973, with no women in the participant pool, are you not seeing the issue in making a multi-gendered generalization whilst utilizing one genders perspective, a perspective that is also quite dated, mind you?” You cocked a brow and Jimin found himself a bit amused at the man who scoffed.

“You learn those words in high school two months ago?” He snapped back and Jimin grimaced along with most of the lecture hall.

“What? You need me to define them?” You quipped, eliciting some laughter as the professor regrouped.

“Ah, educational discourse.” The professor joked lightly as Jimin’s eyes remained fixed on you as you noticed a few lingering gazes on you, shrinking in your seat.

He saw you in the lunch hall, sitting alone, not uncommon for anyone in college, except your eyes were a bit puffy. Before he could even question the urge, he acted. Within a few steps, he was at your table and you looked up in confusion, “Uh, hi?” You meekly spoke and Jimin realized he had no plan.

“U-Uh, you… uh… do you like the cookies?” He forced out and immediately wished he could disappear.

You looked down at the cookie on your plate, “Uh, yes? Is-Is this a fat joke or do you actually want to know?” You asked cautiously.

Jimin’s eyes widened, “No, I mean yes, I mean no, I would never make fun of your weight.” He squeezed his eyes and sighed, not able to see your growing smile at his mental turmoil, “I have psych of gender with you and people rarely talk in that class so I thought you were pretty cool.” He smiled and he noticed you relax.

You nodded, smiling slightly, “Ah, I see. Thank you.” You beamed and it was like he felt the warmth from you, “I don’t do super well with attention but I also have poor impulse control.” You chuckled and he finally understood why you had cried and his heart strings were tugged a bit, “And yes, the cookies are good.” You split one in half and offered it to him.

Life goes by a lot quicker when one waits for the perfect opportunity. This much he found out quickly when he found himself a year later, looking across the courtyard at you, this time as your TA. He tried dating to get the daunting idea of talking to you after that singular interaction in which he forgot to give you his name from his mind to no avail. No matter, surely this would be the year.

”Jiminie is so hot!” Jimin continued to pretend not to hear his ex, Yoora, whine in your ear as he observed the intro to modern dance class.

You looked to her thoughtfully as you stretched, “You mean the TA, that is not that far away?” Your voice was lowered, but he could still hear you. He found himself listening closer, wondering if you remembered the singular interaction you both had. Yoora nodded in the corner of his eye.

“Yep.” She affirmed, “We dated, it was magical, and he’s still hot.” She mused and Jimin grimaced a bit, feeling bad he dated a girl that seemed to be a decent friend of yours, “Do you know him?”

Jimin perked up a bit, “We talked once, seems nice, is obviously hot.” You shrugged, “I doubt he remembers me, though.” You leaned down to reach past your left foot as Yoora urged you on with her eyes, “I had gotten into a weird debate with this one dude in a class we had and he saw me after, and I had just cried because I hate arguing and stares.” You and Yoora laughed a bit, “Then, he just came up to me and asked if I liked the cookies I were eating, and I wasn’t sure if he was calling me fat at first.” Yoora gasped and Jimin felt pain just thinking about the awkwardness, “He wasn’t, and he got cutely flustered when I asked and then I gave him half of my cookie and that’s all.” You moved to your other leg, “And then he never talked to me again.” You laughed and Jimin wanted the floor to swallow him.

Another year goes by. The day before he was going to try and ask you out, you were hospitalized. He didn't know how to even approach the topic with you, but he did try to be there for you throughout that year. The professor he was TA for insisted Jimin also utilize his emails, so all throughout your brief stay in medical care, it was him who received your bubbly emails. The emails full of little emoticons and exclamation points that made him giddy and took him hours to conceptualize a response to. Although you didn't know it was him giving you extensions and safe regards, he still meant it.

He was practicing when he got the email,

“Attention students,

We have received knowledge of an incident that has resulted in the hospitalization of a student that occurred within an apartment close to campus. Proper authorities have been notified and the student is recovering well. Please remain safe and vigilant.”

His face twisted in confusion when he got a text from the professor he was TA for that you were the student in question.

Throughout the semester, Jimin watched you with careful eyes as you slowly acclimated back to yourself. He wondered how he could have been so blinded by your smile that he couldn't properly see your eye bags or the way you looked over your shoulder when you thought no one was looking at you, or how he couldn't see he wasn't the only one looking at you.

When you returned, he watched your eyes relax and your guard go down again. He just wished he could've been there to help you get there. He trudged home one day and found you, and then his whole world was flipped by you again.

Since moving in, he found himself way more advanced with you than he ever imagined. You would plop next to him on the couch and give him a smile, "How was your day, Jiminie?" You beamed at him each time and he nearly choked on his spit each time.

He would mumble an answer and you would hum before watching TV with him, a show he deliberately put on each time he heard you come home. Eventually, you began watching competition shows together, theorizing who would win what. It was comfortable and close, and he found himself falling for you even harder.

"Do you wanna have lunch together?" Your voice pulled him from his thoughts in the practice room he had on his floor in the building. He had agreed to help with your final. The only time he could talk to you without it being a mental nightmare was when it was about dancing. The only time he could initiate contact was in this studio.

The studio gave him a certain air of confidence that even you could see. He wasn't a different person, more so multi-faceted. There was the shy and bumbling part of Jimin just as much as there was the sharp-eyed and focused Jimin. Not to mention the way his fingers would dance on your form as he gave you pointers made you unreasonably aroused.

Even so, determined to challenge himself, he nodded, "Lead the way." His voice was smooth even after two straight hours of practice and you wondered how he could look so hot work out clothes.

You both decided to pick up food and eat it at the studio. You sat across from each other as you ate in polite conversation. It was after you both picked up the food and sat on the floor you spoke up again, "You know, Jiminie." You started, eyes shyly fixated on the floor, "I wanted to thank you for not telling the guys about my, uh, incident a year ago." You finally looked him in the eyes, a soft smile on your face, "Not that it's a huge secret, especially on campus, but I just prefer to tell people myself." You mused.

He blinked, surprised you would thank him for something like that, "O-Of course, I mean, a lot of rumors were going around anyways, so even if I did want to tell them, I doubt I have only the facts." He shrugged, "It's not anyone else's business regardless."

You stifled a little giggle, "Yeah, some of the stories got a bit crazy." You sighed a bit, "From a stalker attacking me to me passing out in the middle of the street." Jimin looked up at you. You didn’t meet his gaze, most likely reliving the aftermath of the whole campus finding out you were hospitalized and are a cam girl in the same week. Not that you were ever hiding you job, but you just wished you could tell people on your own terms.

"Yeah, some crazy things get told in the Arts department." He murmured, "I only knew most of the facts because your TA for Professor Lee's class."

It was your turn to look up, but instead of confusion he saw a polite smile, "I know, silly." You chuckled and when you saw his confused face you looked at him incredulously, "Come on, you're Park Jimin! Of course I'm gonna know the 'hottest dance major'" You fake gushed and he finally broke a laugh, making you giddy.

"Of all things to know me by." He shook his head, smile still present.

You studied his face as his eyes scrunched and cheeks lifted, making you smile as well, "I've never made you smile before and your smile is so pretty." You mused, "I need to step up my comedy game."

"You've never seen me smile?" He looked surprised at this, considering he always smiled like an idiot when he stared longingly at you.

"I mean, sort of, but not to this degree." You shook your head, "I was starting to think you didn't like me for a while."

His eyes widened at this and he panicked, "No, no! I do like you, a lot!" He exclaimed, much to your amusement and to his dismay. You watched him get red with a grin.

He stammered, staring at his fork before he heard your melodious laugh. He looked up and his face softened at the sight of your smile, "You're too cute, Jiminie." You reached forward and pinched his cheek, making his breath hitch. Your cooing tone made something click inside him. He didn't want to be just cute to you, he wanted to be more than any adjective, he wanted to be yours.

He reached up, hand going to wrap around your wrist loosely, "I was the hottest a second ago and now I'm just cute?" A glint of confidence shown in his eye as he made you gulp, "Is that all you think of me, y/n?" Your own name coming from his mouth sent a shiver down your spine and a beat to your core.

You were in a trance while being eyed by the man with a vastly different energy than he had just moments ago. You shook your head lightly, "I think you're beautiful." He cocked a brow and you scrambled for more words, "I had a huge crush on you from the moment I gave you half of my cookie." You breathed before even thinking, snapping you back to reality as you watched his eyes widen, "Ah, me and my mouth!" You admonished yourself, "I didn't mean to make you uncomf-" You frantically moved to take your hand back only for his grip to tighten, pulling you forward, placing your hand at the nape of his neck while his arm wrapped around your waist.

You gulped at the newfound closeness, bodies nearly pressing against each other as he eyed you sharply, "Do you mean it?" He breathed, "You had a crush on me?" You made a move to slink away, but you he gracefully laid himself down with you on top of him, his thigh mere centimeters from your core and he gave you a mischievous smile, "Don't leave me hanging." He teased.

"I-I mean… yes, but can-"

He cut you off with a sigh and a laugh. You braced yourself for him to laugh at you, and say how weird it would be had you confessed and how weird the idea of you two together would be.

It's a song and dance you've seen many times as a hopeless romantic chubby girl. Of course, now you know you were just too much woman for such little men, emotionally little at the very least, but you would be a liar if you didn't still feel the hurt of humiliation. The last thing you wanted was to look into Jimin's eyes and find the same pitying glint, but you were nothing if not a bit brave, at least sometimes.

You forced your eyes from his chest to his gaze and found… an emotion you've only every seen in the eyes of your housemates, an emotion you don't quite know yet, even if you felt it too. At your curiosity, Jimin beamed at you further, "I'd be really frustrated right now if you weren’t on top of me." He chuckled a bit and explained further before you could ask why, "I have had such a huge crush on you for years now." You balk at this, shaking you head.

"That's not a funny joke, Jiminie." You huffed, "If I were even a bit more gullible, I would seriously believe you and then my feelings would be hurt-" He pulled you flush against him as he captured your mouth in a soft and sweet kiss. He was slow, but focused, in the way his mouth moved against yours.

Inside, though, Jimin was freaking out. What if you didn't actually want to kiss him? Why didn't he ask beforehand? Should he pull away? But your mouth feels so good. Are you kissing him back or is he just that enthusiastic?

You laid his worries to rest when you used the hand at his nape to pull him closer, mouth opening to nibble on his bottom lip. He groaned lightly, pulling you closer as his tongue mingled with your own and he pressed his thigh into the thin material of your leggings. You gasped at this and it was like a fire lit within him as he sat up and shifted you for your legs to be on both sides of him as he pressed his mouth onto yours further.

His fingertips danced along your form in a much different context than you were used to, but fuck, did it feel nice. Where one arm was securely holding your waist, his hand reached beneath your shirt, getting accustomed to the soft skin as he waited for you to nod. You wanted him to touch you further. You didn't understand what all these hot men wanted with you, but right now, it didn't matter one bit.

Jimin's eyes rolled back when he reached in your sports bra to run his fingers over your hardened nipples. You twitched against him as you gasped, fingers intertwining with his hair roughly, "Shit." He groaned at the sensation.

You both sloppily kissed as he explored your chest with his hands, moaning into each other's mouths at the euphoria of unresolved feelings coming to fruition and the sexual tension finally snapping as you gave him unrestricted access to feel you beneath his fingertips, "Wanted this for so long." He murmurs into your mouth, "So beautiful, fuck." The praises don't stop, and only further spur you wandering hand on as you feel his sculpted stomach.

"Wanna touch you." You whine as your fingers play with the waistband of his sweats and he nods, his own hand travelling down to cup your core, making you squeak, "Fuck, I'm so wet." You realized, half embarrassed and half aroused.

You could feel his amusement as he slipped his hand beneath your tights and panties to make skin to skin contact with your soaked core, and he didn't know how he made it this far, but he just wants to keep going as he feels you soak his hand, "Yeah, baby, you are, just for me." He moans when you follow his lead, hand wrapping around his hardened erection and giving a small squeeze, "Shit!" He gasps as you wiggled your hips against his hand, grinding yourself little by little.

Your hand massaged the head, smearing the precum as you begin stroking him. You both continue moaning into each other's mouths as his hips jerked and you twitched against his hands, "So fucking wet, baby, so sexy." He growled and he slipped a finger inside of you, him groaning at your pulsating warmth wrapped around his finger, "Slid right in, angel." He praises and you let out a choked gasp and he presses his thumb against your clit.

He drank your moans into his mouth like they were an oasis in the desert, and he’s not sure how he’s lived this long without them. Without you by his side and in his arms. He held you close, refusing to even consider loosening his grip because your body against his was bliss in the highest form. You were his, even if just in this moment, and you would be nobody else’s. Nobody could make him feel the way you do, and he, along with the other men that resided in the building, were determined to hold the same monopoly over your emotions. He refused to entertain the idea of anyone beyond this building making you feel anything close to what he was now as he pushed a second finger in, relishing in the strangled moan you gave as you babbled about feeling full.

With the excitement of his dream girl dripping against his hand and your own hand working expertly on his dick, Jimin could feel himself getting close and you could tell from the breathy whines he gave you as he began thrusting his hips in time with his fingers inside you, "Cum for me, Jiminie." You purred before licking at his tongue and he came beautifully with his eyes screwed shut and mouth open as you swiveled your hips agains his, now two, fingers.

"Baby, so good." He whined as his high settled down. He shifted all focus to you and your impending orgasm as he watched you fuck yourself onto his hand, "Feeling good, darling?" He asked teasingly and you nodded dumbly, lips pressed together as you felt your high approach, "I can feel you clenching around my fingers, fuck, you gonna cum in my hand all pretty?" He cooed and you nodded as he met your thrusts, making you clutch onto him harder.

"Can I cum?" You whimpered and Jimin could almost feel himself get hard again at how willing you were to give him the reigns.

"Because you asked so sweetly, of course my love." He let the name slip before you both could even acknowledge it consciously. However, the closeness and the intimacy of it all sent you over the edge and you bit down on his shoulder in attempt to hide how loud you were. He held you close, not minding one bit at the mark you were surely leaving as he fucked you through your orgasm, "Felt good, angel?" He mused and you tucked your face into his neck as you nodded, holding him close as his finger stilled but kept you full until he felt you relax.

You both giggled as you met eyes, licking the other person's cum off of your hands, "Thank you Jiminie." You hummed cheerily.

"Thank you, bunny." He chided before giving you a kiss, "We all really, really, like you, you know that right?" He asked and noticed your hesitation.

"Sure, but people can be sexually attracted to me and not want to… be with me." You spoke wistfully, "People can like me and not want to be with me." You let out a humorless laugh, "And few things make me feel as dumb as getting my hopes up for no reason." Although you had a tendency to do it time and time again.

"Don't be scared to assume we want you as much as you, hopefully, want us." He spoke quickly before he planted another kiss on you and the affection made you smile.

"You realize the irony of the statement coming from you, right?" You chuckled as he helped you stand on shaky legs before just carrying you, "I cum once for you and all of sudden you know everything and are all confident." You chided, unsure how to process his words yet, mind hazy from your orgasm.

"What can I say? You opened my third eye." He joked and you rolled your eyes before leaning your head on his shoulder, enjoying his embrace, the idea of your housemates loving you back seeming just slightly less like an outlandish fantasy, "Although, it will wear off and then we'll have to do it all over again." He sighed dramatically and you giggled.

"What a shame." You fake gasped, "I hate engaging in sexual relations with hot guys." You complained sarcastically.

"So you do think I'm hot!" Jimin cheered triumphantly.

You laughed against him and realized the only times you felt so free were with your beloved housemates. You wondered if they felt the same. You also found a more insecure part wondering for how long they would feel that way. How long would it be until a girl, or several, much prettier than you or less needy catches their attention. You wondered if you could take the pain of watching the sincerity drain from their eyes just as you've seen in your mom, your dad, your uncle, your first relationship to your last. You wondered what it was about you that made it so easy to be left behind.

Jimin's phone pinged, ripping you from your melancholic thoughts. He sighed, pulling it out and you fought the urge to see if it was another person vying for his romantic attention. He didn't belong to you, even if you wanted him to, "Ah, Namjoon wants to know if you want the demo for the new zombie game he's working on and Jin wants to know if you'd like your first pick of the new stickers he got, and Hoseok wants to try a new hairstyle on you and ah, they all sent me something to ask you…. Gosh, they all think I'm your secretary when we're together." He whined and you held onto him tighter with a light laugh as he went through everyone's inquiries for you.

You also found yourself how you went on this long without them and how you could even consider hesitating if they asked you to stay with them for much longer.

Tip Jar

#yandere bts #bts au #bts fanfic #bts smut #jimin smut #park jimin #yandere jimin #yandere bts smut #yandere smut #the household bts

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jisungsmochi · 3 years

Text

i’ve got this friend - mark lee

based on the (unreleased) song by 5SOS

neighbour & friend! mark + a very oblivious y/n (female)

word count: 1.7k

summary: after a rumour stirs that you have a secret admirer, your neighbour and friend, mark lee begins to drop some, not so subtle, clues on who it might be. will his mission be a success?

mark hated lee haechan more than anything in the world right now. the little menace decided to spread the rumour that you had a secret admirer. mark was in panic mode, wanting nothing more than to roll up in a ball and cry.

“what the hell, man? what if she finds out?” mark groaned, holding the bridge of his nose, as haechan continued to giggle.

“would that be so bad? you’ve been pining over her since you became neighbours. isn’t it time for you to finally tell her how you feel?”

“what if she’s disappointed?” haechan immediately stopped laughing, furrowing his eyebrows at his glum faced friend.

“but what if she’s over the moon? you always look for the bad in these situations. you’re confessing to her, you have to” mark knew inside that he was partially right. it had been almost two years since he developed a friendship with you. although you weren’t attached to the hip, you were both friendly towards eachother and spent a fair amount of time together. haechan claimed he had a fool proof plan to ‘get the girl’ so let the games begin...

“hey! y/n, wait up” mark caught up with you as you exited your house.

“oh goodmorning mark” you smiled as you walked over to him, continuing to walk alongside him on your way to school.

“i gotta tell you something” he looks away from you, eyes drawn to the ground. you silently urge him to continue,

“i heard that someone likes you”

you immediately stop in your tracks, your face contorting into confusion yet also, excitement.

“really? do you know who it is?” you trailed slowly behind him, he didn’t even notice you had stopped briefly.

“uh yeah, i’ve got this friend, he doesn’t really want me to tell you who he is yet” you felt your heart sink, is this all some sick prank?

“mark, you don’t have to feed into these rumours-“

“no i’m being serious, you have an admirer” he softly smiled, making you feel slightly more at ease. mark had never lied to you before, why would he start now? you decided not to pry him anymore, wanting to keep this to yourself for the time being. of course you were curious as to who it was, but maybe keeping their identity hidden is giving them the courage to contact you eventually. you were hopeful, and so was mark. he wanted nothing more than for you to make your way to him.

“so is there anything else you wanna tell me about said admirer? is he tall? do i know him?” you begin to become impatient as you sat across from mark at your usual lunch table.

“um he’s kinda my size? i guess. you might know him, he does go to our school” you begin to turn around, scanning your eyes over the courtyard.

“don’t look now! he might be looking” mark hurriedly spoke, not thinking about his words.

“oh so he’s close to where we are?” you grew even more curious than before. you were going to get mark lee to crack, it was the only way.

‘oh fuck’ he thought to himself. what is he going to do now?

“mark, it’s honestly killing me! you really can’t tell me who he is? is he really that shy? or am i just intimidating?” you frown as you sit on mark’s couch in his basement. he invited you over sometimes whenever he was bored and needed someone to go over some of his song ideas with. mark was in a band with some of his close friends, they didn’t really have a proper name yet, and had barely played infront of people.

“you’re not intimidating at all! you’re one of the kindest people i know” he quickly jumps to your defence. he hesitates for a moment before continuing,

“well he plays the bass guitar, and oh! he thinks you would like him better if he had a car, kinda feels like a loser for not having one” your mind begins to wind, who do you know that can play bass and has no car...

well jeno was the official bassist of their band...and you remember him complaining at one of their practices that he was late because he had to take the bus. but really? did lee jeno have a crush on you? that seemed unrealistic. you barely had any interactions with him, only greeting him nicely whenever you tuned in to their practices. was mark trying to set you guys up or something?

“is it someone from your band?” mark froze, not expecting you to catch on so quickly. (not like he was being so discrete either)

“uh maybe, maybe not. i don’t know” he begins to ramble.

“i’m beginning to think you’re playing some weird prank on me, mark lee. i hope whoever this guy is, comes to me soon. the suspense is killing me!” and with that, mark knew he needed to speed up the plan.

“you gotta tell her soon, your stupid clues are probably making her stressed. and why the hell do you wanna make her stressed?!” haechan gave the older boy a hard smack on the back of the head.

“look, we need a new plan, asap”

“no shit, you’re lucky i’m the damage control” haechan huffed, putting on his figurative thinking cap.

“aha! you’re going to write her a song” mark raised an eyebrow at the younger boy as if he was insane, he can’t write a song in a day, not even a week sometimes.

“not an actual song! just a little snippet of a song describing your feelings, since you can’t seem to say it to her straight out. it’s a brilliant idea and you should thank me” mark understood where he was coming from. maybe if he sat you down, with his guitar and sang to you, it wouldn’t be as awkward or pressuring. lee haechan was in fact a genius.

“mark? it’s like 1am, what do you need me for?” you groan from your side of the phone call.

“i need to get something off my chest, meet me at the park in 10” part of you wanted to hang up and fall back asleep, but another part of you was curious as to why mark lee needed you so late in the night. you dressed yourself in a warm puffer jacket before making your way to the playground across from your and mark’s houses.

you saw him sitting on one of the swings, his guitar tucked close to him, his fingers strumming to a random tune.

“this better be good” you sigh, taking a seat on the swing next to him.

“the reason i asked you to come out here is because i haven’t been completely honest with you. i don’t want you to say anything until the song is done, it would really save me the embarrassment” he warned, making you slightly nervous. he took a deep breath, eyes focused on the strings of the guitar, before he began to play.

[ *cue ‘i’ve got this friend’ by 5sos hehe]

“I've got this friend who's crazy about you

I've got this friend who can't be without you

I've got this friend and I wish I could see

See what you'd say if I told you it was me

I want to tell you to see what you'd say

Before I jump in and I ask for that date

I've been that friend

I've been that friend and I wish I could see

How this would end if you knew it was me?”

your heart melted at each lyric. mark lee had been that ‘friend’ all along. the mark that always waited for you to walk to school together. the mark that always brought you home bubble tea when you were feeling down. the mark that always invited you over just because he enjoyed the company. it was him. it was always him.

you felt tears begin to fill your eyes, causing mark to place his guitar down and stand across from you, holding your shoulders gently.

“d-did i say something wrong? did i mess things up? i’m so sorry, y/n. i should have come clean so-“

“no mark, i’m not mad or sad! i’m just really overwhelmed. here i was thinking that this was all some silly joke when the whole time, you were my admirer” you slightly sniffled at the last part, making mark’s heart swoon. he wiped a tear that fell from your eye, as you leant into his warm palm.

“i don’t need you to say you like me back or anything, i just couldn’t go on with life without you knowing”

“i understand. and trust me, i’ve always seen you as my cute next door neighbour. and honestly, i’d be lying if i said that i haven’t thought about dating you” you felt heat rise to your cheeks, hoping he wouldn’t notice due to the cold.

“but all those clues! it must have been so entertaining to watch me struggle with piecing it all together! everything makes sense now, except for the bass guitar one. i thought you were just the lead guitarist?” you furrowed your eyebrows as mark began to chuckle.

“i kinda slipped up there, i can play both guitar and bass. i was actually the initial bassist of the band until we found jeno” mark explained, making you feel even more stupid.

“gosh, there i was thinking that jeno was my admirer” you saw mark begin to frown, causing you to stand and face him.

“but don’t worry about him, all my attention and focus will be on you now!” you smiled with glee, watching as mark copied your expression. he leaned down close to you, placing a small peck to your cheek, his breath slowly fanning your cheeks.

“so what do you say? go on a date with me?”

“of course, tell your little ‘friend’ he finally got the girl” you pulled him into a warm embrace, feeling him melt in your arms.

it was safe to say that you and mark didn’t remain friends for much longer.

#mark lee imagine #mark imagine #nct mark imagine #nct fluff #nct imagine #nct fic #mark lee fic #mark lee fluff #nct mark fluff #nct mark scenario #nct dream scenario #nct dream fluff #nct dream imagines #nct 127 imagine #nct writing #jisungsmochi masterlist #jisungsmochiimagines

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uelden · 3 years

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Vanity Fair interview translated

Just a side note before the actual translation; I don't know why, but instead of reporting the full questions and answers in full as she should, the journalist decided to report only summarized fragments of what Måneskin said and patch these fragments up into messy clusters. She also worded a couple phrases in a very confusing way (and yes, she's fully Italian). In short, she did quite a poor job, so the final shape of the interview is not that good. I didn't expect top-tier journalism from Vanity Fair but ffs. You'll see what I mean.

I translated it as it is, adding just a couple footnotes to give you insight on Italian pop culture references.

Translation under the cut

Måneskin: "Different from whom?"

by Lavinia Farnese, 09 June 2021

"True justice is being judged for what you do and not for what you are." The ones who are convinced of this are Damiano, Victoria, Ethan and Thomas who, by being the emblem of a generation that is finally free, refuse labels and conformism. In life, in love and on the stage. Where, maybe precisely because of this, they're winning everything

With the still unexpected (first place at Sanremo Festival) and the incredible (triumph at Eurovision) in their eyes, Måneskin are on the sofa of the house-studio they rented - to resume writing songs and rehearsing them - like you are after a won battle: lying in a calm and unreal silence, alert and a bit irreverent, happy.

In the garden there's the tennis table and the pool, the light of summer when it's starting and calming the country all around, and it filters inside from the large windows, and it goes onto the shining black of Ethan's hair, which blends with Thomas' eye shadow and the butterfly he has tattooed oh his naked forearm, which completes the picture of Victoria's golden crucifix hanging between neck and tank top and ends on the black nail polish of Damiano's stretched hands.

It's a human fresco, a Theatre of wrath [translator's note: "Teatro d'ira"] - to call it with the title of their latest album, a platinum record already - where their flaunted 20 years of age, their irregular femininity and virility are grown into proud and challenging custom, a pop glam rock generational manifesto of hard-earned liberties in a finally-unconditional expression of the self.

To watch them from any angle and from another age is to think that a great love will be born in those who'll understand: this new way of being in the world, the true and sovereign realm they hold where "diversity=exceptionality", the power of the artistic and cultural revolution of which they are healthy carriers in establishing in all lyrics and gestures the right to live according to one's own nature past the "people (who) talk, the people (who) unfortunately talk, and don't know what the fuck they're talking about." [tn: "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

We go where we're afloat, where the air isn't gone. [tn: journalist's own variation on "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

Miley Cyrus says hi – The numbers of a phenomenon

"The streams of Zitti e buoni are growing by the second, and they bring us above Muse, at the top of English charts, twelfth in the Spotify Global Chart. Followers almost tripled, in the post-Rotterdam period (from 1,4 to 3,3 millions, ed.) Contagious and universal folly: t-shirts and merchandising sold out in 10 minutes. Like the records, the tickets for a tour that keeps adding dates and expanding over geographic maps. They're contacting us even from some festivals were The Rolling Stones went." Thomas

"After the pretextual controversy over cocaine that France built against us, later disproven by my drug test, some graffiti popped up in Spain depicting me as a “No drugs” poster guy. Some tweets made us laugh: "Congratulations, Italy! I've never been more certain that four people have had sex with each other." Miley Cyrus started following us -You're great. -You guys are greater." Damiano

From the garage to the stars – Story of a flight

"It was only 2016, and we played in restaurants, in the streets, in via del Corso. Damiano without even a microphone, Thomas' guitar with wonky strings, Ethan was drumming on a cajón. During Rome highschools' sit-ins (Kennedy, Virgilio, Mamiani) we had our first confirmations and half-hours of celebrity, playing among those who criticized us and those who went "wow they're really cool." One of the rare times when they would have paid us – 50 euros each – we gave the money to the next band in the lineup so that they would make us play in their spot, later in the day, when there would have been more people. We had already realized how things worked. Visibility mattered more than money. And we still think that." Victoria

The intimacy of rock – Choice of a genre

"Music allows us the miracle of extending to others some very personal and private topics, sometimes even difficult and thorny ones. They are and they remain deeply your own, but at the same time they become a confession that reaches a wider audience, and in this passage that is alike a delivery, they find a place in you as well, a processing of them. You overcome them, you accept them. One second it's something aggressive, the next it's a ballad. Cathartic». Damiano

Against panic – The stage as therapy

"I've suffered a lot from anxiety and panic attacks, it's an issue I've worked on thanks to a psychotherapy course, my friends and my family. Playing helped me in not letting myself be paralyzed by my fears, not making myself limited in my private and professional life. I've learned to accept, to live with this side of myself. I don't hide it. I don't feel ashamed of it." Victoria

Analysis as necessity – Relying on someone saves you

"This belief that only madmen go to the psychologist is a widespread ignorance. No-one's born learned. [tn: common Italian saying] And it's often hard to understand the very reason why we're here, let alone the origin and direction of our desires. It's a long and legitimate journey towards lucidity, a kind of backing to become transparent." Damiano

Being out of our minds – But different from them [tn: "Zitti e buoni" lyrics]

"When you feel a strong passion towards something that is not a canonical job but an artistic language, that already puts you on a level of anomaly, which is not superior or inferior to other people, but it puts you in the position of the one who breaks the mold and also works at a loss, the one who sustains great risks while trying to do something that who knows if it will take you anywhere. "Why do it if it doesn't pay?". You want to give this dream of yours an aesthetic, but it becomes "You're dressing so weird! You must be gay!" - now that I'm 22 I laugh about it, but when I was 17 it had an effect on me, too." Damiano

The beauty of uniqueness – Of believing in it and defending it

"And I mean, at the end of the day if we're all different it's not because we want be alternative but because, really, no-one is the same. Justice is being judged on what you do and not what you are. Justice is equality, respect, beauty." Ethan

Fluid sexuality – Pride is freedom

"Heels for men that like themselves in them, kisses among ourselves, we have an open, extended mind, and we're proud of it. The horizons become vast, past the oppression of conservative families. With the information on the web knowledge becomes greater and with it the possibility that minorities will be less and less minorities, because the majority will be less of a majority. This way we'll make insults and bullying grow quieter. If social media get to a village of 50 souls and reveal to a girl who's afraid of the dark that someone has felt her same fear, then there's no reason to give a name to that fear, to mark it with labels which also limit and restrict. Definitions always had this effect on me. You shouldn't even consider the gender when judging someone, let alone their orientation." Victoria

Sexism – A culture to be dismantled

"Emma [tn: Emma Marrone, Italian singer] drops the bomb: “At Eurovision when I was there they massacred me for a pair of shorts, while they said nothing to Damiano – bare-chested and in heels.” The easy judgment against women is more fierce, constant, debasing (if I have a lot of sex I'm cool while Vic is a whore, where I show myself strong I'm a leader while Vic is despotic and a pain in the ass who reached success because she's hot.) As a male I'm privileged, the abuse I get is not comparable to those a woman has to live through, the comments over my aesthetic are centered only on my aesthetic and don't insinuate anything about my professionalism and my competence, while women are victims of this kind of thought in a systematic way. It happened though to find myself standing with a woman who while pulling me to herself to take a selfie, started licking my face out of the blue... I mean, what the hell do you want? Who asked you? Consent exists, and it's due." Damiano

Grow yourself – The only commandment

"To me conformism is the opposite of education [tn: could also mean "politeness"] and is the asphyxia of expression. I fortunately never endured heavy bullying, heavy enough for the the judgement of others to change me. But the mold of the small crumbs of bullying I got and of the kind of aggression that scars is the same. If I'm a kid who dances and likes dolls you have to let me do what I like. I was a kid who wanted to keep his hair long and played with Barbie. As a teen, my friends looked at my hair: " You have to find a girl with short hair to be at your side." My grandparents took away my dolls: "Stop it, they're not for you." Ethan

"When I was six I was already sick of them, the distinctions between masculine and feminine. I've always had strong ideas about how I wanted to be. I refused things that were typically defined as girly, and all around me they mocked me because I went skateboarding, I played soccer, I didn't wear skirts, I was giving myself the chance to be as I wished. I endured it a little, I suffered a little, but I had courage, and now thanks to that courage I know that I could have gotten even much more hurt, otherwise I would have left to others the most important choice: the one about myself." Victoria

Love in progress – Music, girlfriends

"I've been married to music for the last 20 years. I can't wait to celebrate our golden wedding anniversary." Ethan

"Everyone makes their own experiences, sometimes it goes well, sometimes it goes wrong, but it's always not anybody's business." Thomas

"When I first felt feelings and attraction towards a girl it was a bit disorienting because I had never had the courage of going beyond the limitations I had put for myself. For society being heterosexual is the norm and so you often define yourself in that way automatically, depriving yourself of the freedom to live many shades and faces of love. Once I overcame the initial insecurity of having to call into question my certainties I've lived my sexuality in a very natural and free way, as it should be for everyone." Victoria

"I had paparazzi at my door every day and night. So, after four years of relationship, I revealed her name. I still have paparazzi at my door every day and nigh, but at least I don't have to hide anything anymore." Damiano

The worth of the group – Phenomenology of protection

"The true engagement though, the true family is among ourselves, our band. We've believed in it since day zero, even before we called ourselves Måneskin (Moonlight in Danish), even before Ethan drew a giant moon on the flier for the first concert we ever did. We share everything, even the pain for the tragedy of Seid Visin, who committed suicide at 20 because of racism. [tn: I think the journalist asked them their opinion about Seid Visin's death, which was a current events topic in Italy, and then pasted it syntaxically in the middle of Thomas' answer, which was not a great move] A group is what we all should be: stay united and not back down an inch in the face of oppression that is generated by a distorted view of diversity." Thomas

I'm not of the right age – Like Gigliola [tn: Gigliola Cinquetti won Eurovision with her song "Non ho l'età", which means "I'm not of the right age"]

"Before you the only one who won both Sanremo and Eurovision on the same year was Cinquetti (1964). If there's anything I feel I'm not of the right age for? No, honestly no. Maybe having children. Regarding children I'll be honest: I'm not of the right age." Damiano

Having touched the sky – The fears that remain

"We're more than inside the dream, we're in the conquered dream. When you fly high there's the risk of plummeting and hurting yourself, but we'll work hard not to end up like Icarus, who burns his wings with the sun. Everything is in our hands. And this - a bit pretentiously - reassures us rather than scaring us." Damiano

#maneskin #måneskin #vanity fair #italian #translation

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