my partner and i broke up so I am now going to be a slut (I am emotionally incapable of being a slut)

Importunity

a lot of people wanted a Shalnark fic so here ya go~

💕Happy Valentine’s Day💕

Warnings: kidnapping, graphic depictions of violence, mentions of death, threats of violence

You'd gotten out.

Your brain was a little too high on the adrenaline of a successful escape for you to think over how exactly you had managed it, but you'd gotten out. The months of living with the man named Shalnark had been slowly wearing you down, exhausting you and at times you considered giving in to him. To 'let him love you', as he put it. Things would've been easier if you could just resign yourself to him and try to live that sweet lie that this relationship was normal and also one that you were still willingly part of.

But resilience held strong, and after many, many attempts at escape, you finally managed to make it to the outside while he was away.

Of course, you were only done with the first part of this plan.

For the second half, you needed to get out of the area before Shalnark came back. And so you were speed-walking through the busy streets of the city, keeping your head down for fear of Shalnark coming back and spotting you. You had never gotten this far before; if he caught you, whatever punishment you would receive for this attempt would be much worse than what he'd done to you previously. And whatever he did to you, he would have that same sickeningly-sweet smile on his face the entire time.

How could a person look so cheerful while they hurt someone else?

At one point you did like Shalnark. You would have gone as far as to say that you loved him. He was nice, if a little bit odd, but after your bad breakup with your ex, Shalnark felt like a breath of fresh air. He was happy to give you attention and eager to go out with you. When the two of you were together, his focus was 100% on you. And the sex was actually good. Shalnark was everything your ex wasn't, and you were happy that you had met such a man.

But after a little while of dating, once the exhilarating feeling of entering a new relationship had died down, red flags started popping up. Like how obsessive Shalnark was when it came to you. How he'd regularly go through your phone to delete contacts of yours, or how he had downloaded weird apps to your phone and computer so he could “keep an eye on you”. The phone made a little bit of sense, maybe, but the computer? You'd questioned him and tried to get him to uninstall those apps off your devices, but he refused.

“Shalnark, do you not trust me?”

At the time, you assumed that this behavior came from a fear that you would cheat on him, and that hurt you more than you had anticipated.

He sensed that as well, as it was one of the few times his cheerful expression vanished, watching you as tears began to well up in your eyes at the thought that he believed you to be a cheater.

Shalnark grabbed you then, holding you against his chest.

“It isn't that at all,” he assured you, stroking your hair.

“I really do want to make sure that you're safe. This is all just in case of a worst-case scenario. If something bad happens and I need to find you immediately.”

He pulled away from you slightly, cupping your face with both hands as he smiled at you again.

“So don't cry, okay?”

“.... What are you worried about exactly?” you asked.

“Lots of things.”

He didn't give you any answers beyond that.

You tried overlooking it. Tried to keep your mind on the positives, but more red flags kept popping up. How he would leave for long periods of time with no explanation, how when he came back, he was sometimes covered in cuts and bruises, and how he would always brush away your concerns and cheerfully refuse to tell you anything. Whenever he was back, he wouldn't let you be around any of your friends, insisting on taking up every second of free time that you had. But when it came to his private life he was willing to drop everything and leave you without explanation.

You felt like you were being used. And you reached your breaking point when he had tried to insist that you not spend any time with your friends when he was out of town.

“I can't do this anymore,” you said, head in your hands as the two of you stood in the kitchen.

“What do you mean?”

“I want to break up.”

Seconds passed by, and Shalnark said nothing. When you moved your hands aside to look at him, he was still smiling at you.

“I see,” he said.

He didn't sound angry, and for a second you wondered if he had been treating you badly to make you break up with him.

Without another word, he pulled out a strange looking needle.

You didn't remember anything after that.

All you knew was when you awoke next, you were in a completely different room in a completely different apartment with Shalnark standing over you.

“I guess I should have seen it coming,” he said to you, “it seems I pushed you a little too hard. But that's all right. We can start over now.”

You were at a loss for words for a few moments as you struggled to understand the situation.

“Start over?” you finally asked.

“Yep.”

“Shalnark, no. I broke up with you.”

“I don't care. I'm keeping you here,” he answered.

“No. I-I don't want to be here,” you said, shaking your head.

“Please Shalnark. Let me go home.”

He grinned, sitting down on the bed with you and grabbing you when you tried to pull away, leaning in until your foreheads were touching.

“Not a chance,” he whispered.

From there the nightmare worsened. You couldn't leave the apartment, and any time you tried, he would catch you and hurt you. Every time, he told you that he didn't want to do it. That it was your fault because you kept misbehaving.

“Things would be easier if you stopped lying to yourself. I know you still have feelings for me.”

You refused to think about that fact. Even though the way he had been treating you before the kidnapping had hurt you, part of you did still care about him. One part of your stupid brain still cared about this incredibly callous man even after everything he had done had you wanting to give in, and you hated yourself for it. It had to have been an act, right? The way he had been when you first met, and how he claimed that he loved you. There was no way he was capable of it. He just wanted to hurt you for his own sick pleasure, and you vowed to never give in to him. You would get away from him and tell the whole world just how much of a sick fuck he was.

You told him that. In the heat of the moment, you had said it right to his face.

He just smiled, and you blacked out again.

The next morning you had awoken to your whole body aching; your muscles were sore and you could barely move your arms and legs. When you stumbled into the bathroom to inspect yourself you found that there were also several cuts and bruises over your entire body.

“Something the matter?”

Shalnark was standing in the doorway, looking pleased with himself as he looked you over.

“.... Shalnark, what did you do?”

He ignored the question, giving you a closed-eyed smile and asking if you wanted breakfast.

You shook those thoughts from your head. Right now, you needed to concentrate on getting away. Once you were safe and had made certain that Shalnark wouldn't be able to touch you again, you'd find a therapist who could help you deal with your trauma and hopefully then you'd be able to go back to being a regular member of society. But right now, you needed to leave before Shalnark came back from his errand and found you missing.

You followed signs pointing in the direction of the subway, which was most likely the fastest way out and the only form of fast transportation that you could really afford, as the meager pile of change you had managed to collect behind his back was all that you had in terms of cash. Just enough to get you to a station on the outskirts of the city and then you'd figure it out from there. You just needed to get as much distance from him as you possibly could.

The streets were fairly crowded, and you needed to dip and weave your way through several groups of people that were walking far too slow and hindering your escape. You'd bumped into a few people, all of who were asking what your problem was as you hurried away. With all of the time that had passed since you were taken, you were certain that you'd been listed as a missing person, but being recognized as that right now wouldn't do you any good.

You spotted the steps that lead down to the underground subway, and against your better judgment, you felt a wave of relief wash over you as you cut through the crowded street to make it down those steps. Things could still go wrong. You knew that. But you were so close and if you could just get onto that train you'd finally be able to get help.

When you were just a few feet away from the top step, a hand grabbed you by the upper arm.

Your mind instantly told you that it was Shalnark, but when you looked to your side, you found an older man with graying hair holding you in place. You didn't recognize him, but he was yelling at you in a language you didn't understand. What you did to earn this reaction, you weren't sure, but it was costing you time and drawing attention as people around you turned to look at the commotion.

“I'm sorry, but I don't know what you're saying,” you said, trying to pull your arm away from him. Instead his grip became tighter and he grew red in the face, virtually screaming at you.

You didn't need this. And you needed to go now.

“Please let me go,” you tried, but it got you nowhere. The old man was still screaming and the crowd around you had stepped back, creating a circle around the two of you. There were murmurings all around you that slowly grew louder, and at one point you swore you heard someone say your name, but all you could really focus on was the old man and the way your heart was beating in your ears as your panic grew at a rapid pace. This was already a scene and with how unstable the man was acting, it could easily become violent.

You were scared. Scared that this man would hurt you, but more so you were scared that Shalnark would somehow manage to catch wind of this and track you down.

No one helped you as you tried to pull away again, the old man responding by jerking your arm harder, making you cry out. Why was no one helping you?

You kicked him in the groin. Hard.

The old man's screaming finally stopped as he stumbled backwards, releasing his grip on you.

You sprinted away, pushing past the people who had gathered in front of the subway stairs.

Someone grabbed you by the wrist, and you were spun around as you yanked your hand back.

You didn't actually see how close you were to the top step, but the momentum of pulling your wrist away sent you flying back.

You were aware of how your heel slipped over the edge of the top step.

And then you were falling.

Down into the darkened space of the subway station, and away from the crowd of people that stared at you, making no move to stop your fall.

Why was no one helping?

Your head hit the bottom of the stairs.

You probably hit a few other places on your body before you reached the bottom, but it was impossible to tell once you'd hit your head. You were too disoriented to tell what else was hurting; you could only focus on the pain in the back of your skull.

God, it hurt.

The world around you began to blur and you could only make out shapes and colors. At a certain point everything began spinning and you needed to close your eyes to keep from throwing up. You threw up anyway. At least, you thought you did. Trying to move was a mistake, and you were forced to keep still while you heard people talking around you. Hands that were grabbing you, hoisting you up at one point.

When you heard sirens you cracked your eyes open slightly and you were immediately punished by bright white lights above you that forced you to shut your eyes again.

A hand grabbed your face and pulled it to the side, making the pain in your skull shoot through you. Someone was prodding at spot where your head had hit the ground, brushing your hair aside to look at the injury. They weren't being gentle, either.

You were pretty sure you threw up again.

Time passed in bits and pieces.

A lot of talking, though you couldn't make out what was said.

A lot of faces you didn't recognize, looking down at you. They didn't seem happy, and you wondered why.

A lot of different machines, that you were either put into or were placed around you. Needles, tubes and fresh white sheets.

You tried talking a few times. You weren't always sure if there was anyone around when you did, but you always tried when you felt like you had the strength.

It'd be nice to know why you couldn't smell anything.

If you were able to get out any coherent sentences, no one ever answered you.

A sterile white ceiling greeted you when you opened your eyes next. There were noises, too. A dull chatter of voices from beyond the room and a constant beeping that sounded from the machines next to you. The amount of time it took you to realize that the plain white room was a hospital room was embarrassing, really. It should have been the medical equipment that tipped you off, but it was only when you got a look at the plastic barriers around the bed that you were able to deduce where you were.

Your head was still aching. How far had you fallen? Would there be permanent damage? In your haziness you managed to remember that most hospital rooms had a button to call for a nurse. Best to find that and try to get some answers.

But when you tried moving your arm, you found that your wrist was stuck on something.

Looking down, you saw that your wrists and ankles had been strapped to the bed and you were barely able to move them a few inches.

They only strapped people down when they were acting violent, right? Why would they do this to you? You couldn't remember a lot, so maybe you had acted out at one point before you got here? What other reason would they have to tie you down?

Shalnark.

In the midst of your confusion over your current situation, you remembered the man you were trying to get away from. The fact that you were in a situation where you were tied down and completely vulnerable sent a rush of adrenaline through you and you struggled at your restraints. He'd be coming for you, and you did not want to still be here once he found this hospital.

One of the machines next to you began to beep rapidly, signifying your increased heart rate and echoing in the small room.

You hadn't made any progress on freeing yourself when the door burst open, a woman in a white nurse's dress standing in the doorway. She took only a second to assess the situation before she came at you with a needle in hand.

“Please, I can't stay here. He'll find me!” you begged her.

She didn't acknowledge you and only held one of your arms as she injected whatever substance was in the needle into your veins. Whatever it was, it worked fast as you felt yourself beginning to drift back off into sleep.

“He'll hurt me,” you whispered.

The nurse above you scoffed.

“If only.”

Days passed by, and you felt like you were getting better. Not completely better, but your bouts of slipping back into unconsciousness seemed to stop after a point, and the ache in your skull had dulled a bit.

The treatment from the few that were around you didn't get any better. As you slowly recovered from your fall, you were able to see the way in which the nurses regarded you: disgust, mostly, and a fair amount of resentment whenever they needed to come in to take care of you. The one you saw most often was the nurse you had seen when you had first woken up. She was an older woman, and refused to give you any painkillers.

“I knew Regina's mother,” she hissed at you one morning, “what you did to those people was monstrous.”

“.... Who's Regina?”

Your question had earned you a harsh slap to the face, and your evening meal that day came later than usual and tasted worse than the regular hospital meal.

Detectives came in sometimes. Strangely enough they would ask you questions about your relationship with your ex and the last time you had seen him, but they left pretty fast whenever you tried bringing up the fact that you'd been kidnapped. You would only ever get as far as telling them Shalnark's name before they were heading back out the door.

“We'll get the truth when you're well enough to be brought in to the station,” they had said on their last visit.

Based off how you had been doing, it probably wouldn't be long before you were moved to a more secure location.

With no tv or books to occupy your time and the fact that you remained with your hands and legs tied down, there was little else you could do during your time in that room besides think. No one was telling you anything, and you were left to try and figure things out on your own. You had been blamed for something, that was certain, and based off of the reactions of those around you and the fact that you had seen various cops sitting outside your door whenever a nurse came in, it was something serious.

It was Shalnark's doing. It had to have been. Had he framed you for a crime?

Those blackouts you would occasionally have came to mind, along with that morning you had awoken to your entire body feeling sore and overworked. It had been reasonable to suspect that he had done something to you during those times, but you had assumed he was fucking you in your sleep or something. It had never occurred to you that he was using you to do something more.

But aside from that, it was strange he was taking so long to come and get you.

Moving fast was the only way you potentially had any chance of getting away from him, and for you to have not seen him once since your very public apprehending didn't feel right. Once he had figured out where you were, surely he would have been fast in taking you back. It would have been easier than ever if he had come immediately after your fall. The fact that you had remained her for so long could only mean that he was planning something.

You remembered the detectives' words, on how they would be moving you to the police station once you got better. If Shalnark wasn't planning on coming into the hospital to get you, was he waiting for your relocation in order to make his move?

You needed to get out of the hospital before it came to that, you decided.

A frenzied escape attempt with no thought put into it was bound to get you caught. You had learned that much during your time trapped with Shalnark. You needed to keep calm and not draw any attention to yourself. If you freaked out too much and made too much noise, that nurse would come back in, inject you with those drugs and you would lose valuable hours that you needed to get away.

Slowly, and with a great deal of effort, you wiggled the wrist of your dominant hand around in an attempt to get it out of the restraint. Though the straps were made of fabric, it was a stiffer material, and after a fair amount of wiggling, the skin around your wrist was raw and bloody as you tried to loosen it while making your hand as small as possible.

Somehow, after hours of pulling as hard as you could, you finally freed your hand, gasping out a sigh of relief as you took a moment to rest. Luckily, no one had come to check on you yet, but it would be impossible to hide the fact that your hand was no longer tied down if they came too close. At least the remaining restraints were easier to get off, but now you were faced with your next problem: getting out of the room.

It was getting close to evening, around the time when someone would come in to feed you. Whoever came in always came with the sedatives, but you had noticed that most of the staff had been growing somewhat lax during your time here, and you would use that to your advantage.

When the next nurse came in, you were back in your usual spot on the bed, having arranged the sheets in a way so she couldn't see that you weren't tied down. She was a younger, quieter woman who avoided looking at you if she could. And as expected, a needle full of sedatives were on the tray she brought in with your meal.

When she set the tray down, you told her “someone slipped something under the door earlier.”

“What?”

You motioned with your head.

“Earlier, somebody slipped something under the door. I'm not sure what it was, but it looked like paper?”

“I don't see anything.”

“I think it went flying when you opened the door,” you explained.

She sighed, turning away from you to look at the area around the door. When she began to walk forward, you jumped off the bed as quietly as you could and reached for the needle.

“I still don't see anythi-”

Your hand covered her mouth as you stuck the needle into her neck, pushing its contents into her. She struggled briefly and went as far as to bite your hand, but within moments she was out, falling out of your grasp and onto the floor.

You felt terrible as you dragged the nurse across the floor and hid her behind the bed. There was no way you had the strength to lift her up and place her in the bed; you hadn't moved for weeks now and your muscles felt strained just from dragging her. Her neck was bleeding a bit, and you sincerely hoped you had just knocked her out and hadn't managed to do anything that would damage her permanently. If only it had been the nurse who had slapped you that you had come across, then at least you wouldn't have felt as bad.

You felt even worse when you forced yourself to remove her clothing. She was a bit wider than you were and her clothes didn't fit all that well, but it would hopefully work as a disguise so you could get out of the building. At least the long-sleeved sweater she had been wearing would cover the wound around your wrist. In an effort to give her some sort of apology, you placed a blanket over her.

“Everything all right in there?” a voice from outside suddenly called.

…. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. You'd forgotten about the officer outside the room.

“Yeah, everything's fine,” you answered, trying to imitate the nurse's voice as best you could.

“Okay,” was the answer. You didn't think that you sounded much like her, but evidently it was good enough.

“Do you mind waiting in there for a little bit?” the officer asked through the door, “I need to use the restroom.”

“Y-yeah, go ahead.”

“Thanks.”

At least there was a little bit of luck on your side, it seemed. You couldn't believe that you'd managed to forget that there was someone on the outside watching over you, but that problem seemed to have taken care of itself. Best not to try and rely on getting so lucky every time, though.

After a few moments, you peeked your head outside the door, and when you found the coast to be clear, you began to hurry down the hallway.

There weren't many people in the halls, and the ones that were there didn't seem to notice you in your slightly over-sized clothes and shoes. Still, you kept your head down and moved as fast as you could, not willing to risk someone recognizing you again. A staff-only stairway caught your attention, and you pushed on the heavy door and entered the dimly-lit stairwell.

You traveled down several flights of stairs to get to the ground floor. It would probably be a bad idea to try to leave through the front entrance. Finding some kind of side or back door would be best; something like that shouldn't be too hard to find.

A directory caught your attention, and you noted the arrow that pointed the way to a loading bay. It wouldn't be an area that would be open to visitors or regular patients, but there was the chance that hospital workers could be in there. But you didn't know how much time you had left before that nurse was discovered and you were found to be missing, and you didn't want to waste time wandering the halls trying to find an exit. Right now you needed to hope you would just be lucky.

Your luck held as you made it to the loading bay, as the others roaming the hospital halls were too absorbed in their own tasks to pay attention to you. And to your delight, no one was in the loading area either. This was perfect. Just a few more steps and you'd be free. You stumbled a bit down the steps of the platform before you decided to cast off the ill-fitting shoes. It was dumb to run around a city barefoot, but hopefully you could find a change of clothes somewhere and get rid of the whole nurse getup completely.

The cement was cold against your feet as you ran across it. You'd be out of here and then you could focus on getting out of this goddamned city.

As you came up to a pillar, a figure jumped out in front of you. You were too slow to react, and you ran right into it.

“Found you~”

It was a voice that you knew well, and you found that you recognized the shirt that your face was currently pressed up against. Not a lot of men wore purple pastel.

Shalnark was beaming down at you as he wrapped his arms around your back and kept you pressed against him.

“I missed you so much!” he continued, “Really, words can't describe how miserable I was without you around.”

“L-let me go!” you cried, trying to get out of his grasp. He only pulled you in closer.

“But we just found each other again. How could I let you go after we've been apart for so long?” Shalnark said.

You continued to struggle, trying to slip out of his arms that held you in whatever way you could. Shalnark seemed content to watch you writhe in his grasp, but he seemed to tire of it as he let out a quiet sigh and released you. You immediately pushed off from him and ran back to the stairs.

“Who's going to help you in there?”

You had only reached the foot of the stairs when he asked that, and you stopped in your tracks. He had a point. Everyone hated you, to put it lightly. It was unlikely that anyone would come to help you even if you begged them to. Turning back to Shalnark, you found him holding his phone out. He had pulled something up on the screen but it was too far away for you to read.

“Don't you want to know what's going on?” he asked, “come back over and you can find out.”

You shook your head.

“Oh? I thought you would have had questions. You sure you don't want to know?”

“I do,” you admitted, “but I also don't want to be anywhere near you. You'll make me black out again.”

“I won't do that,” he said, “there'd be no point in doing that right now. I promise, I won't do anything. Just come back to me.”

Your hand gripped the railing of the stairs and you looked back to the hospital's back entrance. Every fiber of your being wanted to run back inside, even if you would just be restrained and knocked out again.

“C'mon,” Shalnark tried again, “I'm literally holding all of the answers. All you need to do is walk back over.”

This was some kind of trick. It had to be. Shalnark wasn't forthcoming in anything and his promises meant nothing. All this was some sort of way to entrap you.

But if that was the case, then you were trapped anyway. You had no chance of being able to outrun or outsmart him. Once he caught sight of you, you were caught even before he had held you in his arms. He was letting you move around for now. If you made another break for the door, you'd be knocked out again.

Your hand released itself from the railing, and you slowly walked back to him, every step hesitant as you waited for him to pull something.

For once, Shalnark stayed true to his word as he didn't move when you got closer. He even tossed the phone over to you when you got close enough. You caught it with shaking hands, looking back up at him while he held his hands up in mock surrender.

“See? Nothing bad. I just want you to read it.”

There was no way that was all he wanted, and though it was a stupid idea to take your eyes off of him, with how insistent he was being on this you complied with his demands and looking at the article he had pulled up on his phone.

You had guessed at what he had made you do. In your time stuck in that room, running through in your head the ways that people had treated you, how they had reacted to just seeing you, and you knew that he had made you do something horrific.

But it was still hard to read those words that proclaimed you to be a murderer.

Your ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend, a woman you'd never met named Regina, had been found outside of his car, beaten to death. That same night, the house where Regina's family lived had been set on fire, her mother, father and siblings having all been trapped upstairs and succumbing to the smoke and flames. DNA evidence at both crime scenes pointed to you.

There was a photo, too. Grainy and probably taken from a surveillance camera, but the details were clear enough: you, walking outside, stone-faced and covered in blood.

“Shalnark,” you said slowly, “what did you do?”

“Me? I didn't do anything,” he said, laughing, “it's pretty clear that you're the one who killed your ex and his girlfriend in a jealous rage.”

“No,” you protested, “I-I didn't. It was you. You controlled me. Made me do it.”

“Yeah,” Shalnark admitted. He stepped towards you to take the phone back, adding “but how are you going to prove something like that in court?”

“.... Why?”

The answer to that question was obvious, but you couldn't think of anything else to say.

“Because of that thing you said: that you'd expose me to the world or something. After all we've been through, it made me really sad that you still feel like that,” he explained, “I felt like I wasn't getting anywhere with you. So I decided that some drastic measures were in order.

“You've been really desperate to get away from me, but I wondered: would you still be like that if you knew there was no chance of going back to the way things were?”

“.... What are you saying?” you asked.

“I'll let you choose,” Shalnark answered, “if you really don't want to be with me, I'll let you go. But with all of the evidence there is against you, you'll probably be looking at a life sentence in prison.”

He hummed, hand on his chin as he thought to himself.

“I don't see you doing too well in a prison, personally. And with how bad your crimes were, you'd be sent to the worst one they can find.”

“A-and if I go back with you?” you asked after a moment.

“Then we'll go back to normal!” he said cheerfully, “you'll keep living with me and loving me, and I'll keep you safe. Doesn't that sound nicer than being locked up in some prison?”

“I.....” you began, trailing off. Shalnark waited patiently for you to continue.

“I-I could run away. Go to Meteor City....?”

The sentence came out more like a question.

“You could,” said Shalnark, “but Meteor City won't take you. In fact, if you were to step one foot inside you'd be dead in an instant.”

All of this was becoming too much, and you began to hyperventilate at the thought of what he had made you do to cut off an escape to Meteor City.

“Oh, don't worry. It wasn't nearly as dramatic as the other murders; you just stabbed a guy,” Shalnark explained, “but Meteor City doesn't like it when one of theirs is killed for no reason, so if they find you, they'll retaliate in kind. You're pretty lucky the police here kept your location under wraps; I can't imagine how many attempts on your life there would have been if they'd managed to find out.

“But more importantly, what's your decision? Am I taking you back with me or are you going to reject me one final time?”

Seconds turned into minutes as the two of you stood in in that loading bay, Shalnark waiting for your answer while your brain scrambled to figure out what to do. You couldn't go back with Shalnark. Not after all he had done and all you had tried to get away from him. But he was right that you wouldn't survive in a prison. Not that you would have very long to live if you did go to one, as someone from Meteor City would be fast to find and kill you for the man you murdered.

Oh god, what were your parents going through? To have your name be blasted on the headlines as a serial killer. How many friends had they lost? How were they handling the inevitable ostracization they were going through? How many people were trying to hurt them because they couldn't get to you? And did your parents believe you had done all those things? Did they hate you? Was it the same case for your friends and other family? Or would they be able to distance themselves enough that the court of public opinion wouldn't judge them? All of that didn't even go into what you would go through if you were brought to trial. Your entire character would be picked apart and you would go down in the records as a crazed ex-girlfriend who couldn't stand the thought of the guy she liked being with another woman. And that would last until Meteor City came for you.

A potentially longer life stuck with Shalnark, or one that would definitely be much shorter as you were tried for crimes you didn't commit?

It had started to rain as the two of you stood there, and the cold rainwater ran down the slanted entrance of the loading bay and past your bare feet, making you shiver.

Then you heard police sirens in the distance.

“I think they've found out that you escaped,” said Shalnark, “it's now or never.”

You stood still, staring at him dumbly.

He hummed to himself.

“I see,” he said. Then Shalnark turned, and began to walk away.

True panic hit you at the sight of him leaving you behind. Without Shalnark, you would be at the mercy of the police. You'd be at the mercy of a whole world that thought you were a murderer and wouldn't care if you died. Shalnark at least cared a bit, in his own selfish way that didn't regard your feelings in the slightest.

If you didn't go with Shalnark, you would die.

That thought forced your legs to move you forward, and you reached out to grasp the back of his shirt in a desperate bid to keep him from leaving.

He stopped, and for a moment, the two of you stayed there like that.

Shalnark spun around suddenly, grabbing your shoulders to pull you into a kiss.

It was hard to not resist, and after a few seconds, you pushed forward to make yourself kiss him back.

He was grinning ear to ear when he pulled away.

“I knew you'd make the right choice. I knew you couldn't hate me so much to choose death over me.”

He pulled you into a hug, stroking your back as he told you “don't worry; I wouldn't have actually let you go. There's nothing in this world that could ever make me abandon you.”

You weren't sure if you should believe him or not.

“We'd better get out of here. This place'll be infested with cops pretty soon.”

You wordlessly accepted the hand he held out to you after he pulled away, and you let him lead you out into the rain and the street beyond. He immediately walked you to an awaiting taxi cab, ushering you into the back before he slid in behind you. The taxi driver didn't acknowledge when the two of you entered, and when you looked over to him, you saw a familiar-looking bat shaped needle sticking in his arm.

The car drove off with the two of you inside after Shalnark typed in a few commands on his phone, and he set it aside to focus on you.

“I didn't mention it earlier, but I actually really like that nurse look,” he said, leaning forward to pull down the sweater so he could get a better look at the nurse's dress you had stolen.

“Hmm. It's a little big on you, though,” he commented as he pulled at the fabric a bit to prove his point, “if I buy you one that fits, will you wear it for me?”

You nodded.

Shalnark, grinned, bringing you into another hug.

You wanted to push him away like you had done before, but things were different now. You had chosen to stay with him. Now you needed to accept his advances. Even though he had said that he would never abandon you, how much could you really trust him?

Shalnark speaking your name brought you out of your thoughts, and he whispered to you “if you try to escape again after this, I'll cut off your legs.”

You couldn't see his expression, but his voice was serious, and you jumped when he pulled away once more.

That smile was back on his face, and he cheerfully said “just kidding.”

Going Out Of My Mind In My Mind

Requested fic by anon. (If you have any fic ideas or requests you'd like me to write, you can leave me an ask!)

Book: My First Two Loves

Pairing: Ava Lawrence x MC (Emma Price)

Genre: Fluff but make it angsty

Rating: PG13

Warning: Mild homophobic comments

Word Count: 3,611

A/N: Ava is in love with her best friend. She gets lost in her own thoughts while contemplating if she should reach out to MC. Firstly, I wanna say I’m so sorry to the anon that requested this if they wanted a more light-hearted fluff fic lmfao. If you did, please send me another ask lol. Secondly, I wanna apologise to my fellow wlw for including a little homophobia. It’s not that harsh or mean, but it’s there. I thought including it would better portray a realistic encounter of what it’s like to be a wlw accepting her sexuality and exploring her feelings.

Tag list: @ineedskyecrandall @kamilahsayeet2063 @avalawrencefl @lovekamilahsayeed @thequeenkamilahsayeed @heygmicheelle @djtjsmith14 @jjlover01 @soft-for-drake @dopeyouth @alexroyard @satrinadia @toalltheboysididntlove @mypegasifly @queen-arabella-of-cordonia (lmk if anyone would like to be included or removed in my next fics and if you only want to be tagged for certain pairings.)

The first time I realised I was in love with my best friend was... well, I'm not sure if I'm being honest.

But damn, if that's not the most generic, cliché plot ever for every sapphic film and story ever, I'm not sure what is. However, there was always some truth to fiction and I was no exception.

That was my life. Generic and cliché. Popular high school captain of the cheerleaders who lived in the suburbs and came from a middle-class family that has dated the school's famous golden-boy quarterback.

For far too long, everything was normal. Too normal. Painfully normal.

That is, of course, until I started realising I had feelings for my best friend that was very much into guys. As I've mentioned, I couldn't pint-point an exact date or incident but like a hurricane, it was sudden even though there were warnings signs and it was just as destructive, uprooting and destroying everything I thought I once knew, a force to be reckoned with.

It was utter chaos in a seeming perfect picture but for the first time in my life, I felt alive.

Emma Price was my hurricane. Whether that was a good or bad thing, that was up for debate. All I knew was that I wanted her in my life and didn't care if it wasn't the best idea or if it would hurt me. I just wanted her to be with me.

I think that's the funniest thing about finally having a genuine, heart-wrenching, crush on someone. Even the smartest people get dumb, the most cautious are reckless and the logical becomes irrational. Everything that made sense doesn't anymore because why the hell are you doing things you normally wouldn't do for someone that doesn't even like you back?

I learnt that first-hand and I wished someone would've warned me before that. Not like I would've believed it but at least it would be playing at the back of my mind. An echo in the distance, a nagging voice.

I did the stupidest stuff once I was certain I was in love with Emma. I knew I was in love with her but I was in denial and did things I regretted. Dating other people, trying to make her jealous, downplaying my feelings when I saw her with Mason or Noah. Pushing her away and avoiding her instead of talking to her...

It's different, falling for your best friend. Feelings and signals are mixed, emotions are at a high and everything is just one confusing mess of a relationship that was once simple and innocent.

And now, here I was, laying on my bed, staring at my phone as if it would magically tell me the right thing to do if I looked long enough. It didn't, of course. I sighed, wondering if I should shoot Emma a text. It's been some time since we just talked for fun and I missed her sorely.

Procrastinating, I swiped through my home page. My eyes caught sight of a certain app that I opened ever so often whenever I was missing my best friend.

~*~*~

"Come on! Just download it!"

I scrunched my nose up. "Give me one good reason why."

"Because you’re the best friend in the whole world and you'll do anything I say because you love me?" she said jokingly while batting her eyelashes at me but my heart started racing.

I was acutely aware of her hand on my thigh and the way she leaned into me. My breath hitched at her nearness even though we've been closer before.

That was something else about having a crush on your best friend. Suddenly, everything felt like too much. Every word, every touch, every damn single thing was overwhelming and honestly? It was exhausting. Not only is it emotionally tiring, you go into this weird phase of wanting to savour everything they do and you can't help but wonder why you didn't appreciate these small moments before. You can't help but feel as if you've wasted them all.

If she could sense me stiffen, she didn't show it 'cuz she just went on. "Also, it's about a cartoon cat that eats to save the world! What's not to love?"

"That sounds ridiculous, Em," I laughed. "What's the game called?"

"Dopey Cat!"

"Oh god," I groaned. "That makes it sounds much worse."

"Or much better!" She nudged me and I felt a jolt go up my arm. I always wondered if these simple touches felt the same to her. "Do it"

"Alright, alright!" I giggled and surrendered. "Only 'cuz I'm such a great friend."

"Yes! And like I said," Emma leaned in and my heart dropped to my stomach. "The best."

She gave me a slow, soft peck on my cheek and rested her head on my shoulder, clinging onto my arm and leaving me a flustered mess.

~*~*~

I thought about that moment often. More often then I'd like to admit. Every time I did, the same thoughts would always come to mind.

What would've happened if I kiss her? What if I just turned my head right before her lips touched my skin? Would she have kissed me back? Would she push me away? Maybe she'd say she felt the same way about me.

But that didn't happen, so all I could do was wonder.

And wonder I did.

Being in my room like this, doing nothing, it really did make my mind go everywhere. I've dreamed and cried and laughed and screamed and doing nothing was suddenly the most taxing thing I've ever done. Doing nothing when you're in love with someone who doesn't love you back was the most dangerous thing 'cuz they’re already always on your mind but when you're doing nothing, your thoughts just spirals down an endless pit of possibilities that'll never happen and ultimately, you get hurt.

But knowing this, I still let my thoughts spiral anyway. How could I not when the joy and peace I got from imaging a world where her and I were together was worth the pain and heartbreak?

'Cuz figment of my imagination or reality, it didn't matter, she was worth it.

I've imagine us on dates, having picnics, watching movies, going on road trips, sleeping over, laughing over nothing, at the park, at the beach, in a field, in our rooms.

I've thought about us dancing in the living room at 12 a.m., huddled in bundles of blankets on a cold night, singing along to our song while making breakfast, staying up under the night sky and talking about everything and nothing until sunrise, being able to introduce her as my girlfriend and kissing her whenever I felt like.

I've dreamt about us so much as a couple that I've accidentally mistaken reality for fiction but like I've said, there's always some truth to fiction.

~*~*~

"Congrats on being co-captains, guys!" Iris wished us enthusiastically, practically jumping up and down.

"Seriously, you guys totally deserve it," Toni agreed.

"Thank you!" Emma said.

"You two are the best duo! Our cheer squad is gonna rule with you both leading us!"

"Thanks," I said and pulled Emma in for a side hug, feeling goosebumps from the contact. "We do make a pretty great couple."

I immediately froze when I realised what I said and mentally kicked myself. 

God, that was so stupid! Why was I so careless? I should watch what I say!

That wasn't the first time I've done it and I was sure it wasn't the last, but just like how Emma was always the only one to mess up my constant, she was the one difference between all the other times and this time.

She had never heard me refer to ourselves as a couple but while I was beating myself up, Emma handled the situation coolly. She slid her hand in mine and squeezed which did nothing to calm my wrecked nerves.

"We definitely sure would! She the sweetest, more caring person in the world and I'd be so lucky to call her mine." She leaned into me and gave me a nudge but all I could do was stare at her, eyes wide and brows raised.

Her deep brown eyes locked onto mine and I swear I could feel the spark between our gaze. And what was that I saw in her eyes? Longing? A hint? I wasn't sure but I could've sworn there was something else I couldn't quite decipher. Then again, I didn't really trust my thoughts. If it could make me believe we were actually a couple, why would I ever trust it in this situation? How could I?

I'm not sure how long we were staring at each other 'cuz to me, it felt timeless. We only broke apart when we heard someone making a retching sound.

"Gross! Go get a room," Lauren said as she walked towards us. "No one wants to see two lesbos in action."

I felt her hand fall out of mine and suddenly, I felt very vulnerable.

"You don't have to be rude!" Iris defended.

"Yeah, Lauren, no one asked," Toni agreed.

Emma spoke up. "Go away, Lauren. No one wants you here." She said it in an almost tired manner. She was done with putting up with her and it showed.

"Aw, protecting your lesbian lover? Cute," Lauren rolled her eyes and walked away. "Whatever, later, losers!"

"Don't listen to her," Toni said after Lauren left.

But how could I not?

"Hey, Ava?"

I could hear the sweet voice of best friend calling out to me but it was distant.

Everything was. I didn't feel like I was in my body. All my senses were numb and I felt nothing. Nothing except the raging white heat within me. I was having an out of body experience in the worst way possible and for a moment, I didn't feel human.

~*~*~

Then Ava was definitely different from Now Ava. Then Ava wanted to cry and run as far as she could. But she couldn't. She was paralysed with fear and embarrassment. Now Ava would've just laughed and called Lauren pathetic. Maybe even give her a nice slap across the face if she felt like it. But Now Ava wasn't Then Ava, so why dwell on the past?

The thing is, I didn't want to. But like that dull throb at the back of your skull after a concussion, I just couldn't ignore it. You tell everyone you're fine, and for the most part, you are. But that annoying sensation, constantly reminding you aren't, that you just couldn't forget. That was that moment with Lauren.

Her words played in my mind on repeat for the first week after hearing it. Months later that voice was softer and less frequent, but it was still there.

A lot happened in those months. The biggest of all? I finally accepted that I was gay. No, not gay, a lesbian.

That word Lauren had spoken with a jeer, the word she used to insult me, the word that was meant to humiliate me, I was that word.

That wasn't the only time I heard it used that way but it was the first time it was used against me. Lauren's words was a constant reminder in my mind that being a lesbian was an embarrassment, that I was an embarrassment.

Then Ava would feel a chill run up her spine when she heard that word even though it wasn't directed to her. And when it finally was, her soul left her body but of course, that would've been too easy. Her soul leaving her body would've been the easy way out. So instead, she was forced back into reality and had to find a way to deal with it.

Now Ava knew it wasn't a bad thing. Of course she did, she was one, after all. So why did Lauren's words still haunt her?

I still had to remind myself that it was okay. It wasn't gross or immoral or whatever nonsense they put into my mind about girls liking other girls. And every time I did, the madder I got. At everyone that has ever said anything about it and at myself.

Because how dare they tell me how to feel?

And how dare I listen to them when I knew it wasn't true?

I was at peace with it now. I was at peace with being a lesbian. But being at peace wasn't the same as embracing it, owning it. And I'm not sure if I ever will, but I hope I do.

I wasn't out to anyone, and god, I've never felt so suffocated in my life. I couldn't even tell Emma 'cuz I was afraid of how she'd react. Or worse, that she'd assume I have a crush on her. And the worst part, that it was true. That I couldn't even deny it.

Not being able to tell your best friend whom you've always told everything to made me feel like shit. It ate away at me every time I was near her and whenever we were talking. I always wanted to bring it up but I never found out how. Maybe I will soon, but not now.

Emma had always been understanding. Even when she didn't get it, she would try. She wasn't quick to judge nor did she so easily jump to conclusions but I couldn't help but think that maybe, she wouldn't be so understanding. 'Cuz that's what you do when you overthink. You worry about things that you shouldn't and you create false scenarios and you just, can't, stop.

Which was exactly what I was doing right now.

I sighed, catching myself before I could spiral any further and rolled onto my side, staring out of the window with my phone abandoned on the bed.

It started drizzling and it was getting pretty cold. I moved to get under my comforter and wrapped the sheets around me.

And once again, I closed my eyes as my mind began to wander.

If only Emma was by my side...

~*~*~

"Oh my god! Ava! Stop!" she would giggle as I showered her in kisses.

"Nu-uh!" I'd respond and wrap her up in my arms, still kissing her wherever I could reach as we rolled around on my bed, playing.

She'd try to escape but since I'm stronger than her, it's useless. She's trapped in my embrace and eventually, she'd give in and hug me back.

We'd laughed about silly inside jokes as we let our hands linger over each other's bodies, not wanting to let go.

I'd pull her tight and she'd rest her head against my chest as the rain outside got heavier.

I'd shower her in compliments and she'd blush. We'd talk about life, our hopes and dreams and ambitions. Our plans and future together.

"Would you still be with me?" I'd ask her.

"Forever and always, baby," she'd reply and give me a reassuring kiss.

We'd waste away the rest of the day together and I wouldn't have had it any other way.

~*~*~

But that was just fantasy. She's not here and I'm not ready. Not ready to come out to Emma, let alone confront her about my feelings for her.

I took a deep breath before opening my eyes, as if I were physically preparing myself to come back to reality. I glanced at my phone screen that was opened at her chat. I picked my phone up and got ready to type but I hesitated.

Should I do this?

I didn't have much of a choice though, 'cuz my phone rang and lo and behold, my best friend, my crush, the girl I fell in love with, appeared as the caller ID.

My heart sank but my stomach filled with butterflies. This conflicting emotion wasn't a rare occurrence ever since I fell for my best friend but that didn't mean I was used to it. Fear and excitement coexisted where it shouldn't which only left me with a familiar uneasy feeling.

I only stopped for a moment before hitting the 'accept call' button.

"Hi!" I heard that cheery voice of hers ring from the other side of the phone and I could feel my insides warm.

Hey, yourself." I smiled. "What's up, Em?"

"Nothing much, I just feel like we haven't talked that much." She paused for a while before adding shyly, "And I miss you."

The warmth spread to my cheeks. "I really missed you too."

I heard her giggle and god, was it the most adorable sound ever. "Good to know. What have you been up to?"

Figuring out my sexuality and pining over you.

"Nothing much, just the usual." Liar. "What about you?"

"Just been thinking about you," she said casually and my heart fluttered.

I cleared my throat. "Any interesting stories lately?"

I heard another heavenly laugh. "Too many!"

She jumped right into it, not stopping once and honestly, I never wanted her to. Her voice in my ear was a comfort and I held onto it for as long as I could.

We talked and laughed for hours and I didn't even notice until I glanced at the clock on my wall. Time passed too quickly whenever I was with her, I always felt like it wasn't enough. It never was.

But then again, an infinite lifetime with her would still feel too short. 

"And then, Mack ran out of the house with our dad chasing her in only his towel and shower cap with his back scrubber!" she laughed unrestrained, not holding it back and lighting up the entire world with it.

"Oh my god!" I laughed along with her. "How did she even pull that off? I can't believe I missed that!"

"See? This is why you should come over more often!"

I didn't know how to respond but it was fine because she started speaking again.

"Wow, I didn't realise the time! I should probably head to bed."

"Yeah, me too," feeling disappointed that she was gonna hang up soon even though I let out a yawn. "But I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"For sure! Good night, Ava."

"Night, Em."

"..."

"..."

"Are you still there?" she asked me.

"Uh, yeah?" I replied. "Put down the phone."

"No, you!" She giggled.

I smiled from hearing it. "You!"

"Ugh, fine! Bye."

"Okay, bye bye."

"..."

"..."

"Hello?"

"Emma," I breath out in a light chuckle. "Go sleep."

"Okay! Okay, for good this time, bye."

"Bye," I laughed and before I could stop myself, I added, "I love you."

And I shot up, frozen in place. It wasn't what I say, it was the way I did. Soft and vulnerable and definitely not just a friend proclaiming her platonic love to her best friend.

I heard Emma suck in a sharp breath as if she caught onto it too, and the line went dead silent.

"Ava-"

I heard her whisper but I pulled my phone away from me as if it was poison eating away at my flesh and hit the 'end call' button, tossing it beside me. I didn't hear her finish her sentence and I wasn't sure if I could handle it if I did.

Shit!

I hit my palm against my face and slid it down, groaning. How was I gonna face her tomorrow?

Just then, I heard my phone go off. The ringtone I had set just for Emma played and I swear I felt my heart stop.

Nervously, I glanced down at my phone to see the notification that popped up.

'I love you too <3'

Warmth spread through my body and I let out an involuntary grin. I fell back onto the bed with my arm covering across my face.

I glanced back at the message and made a high-pitched squeal that I never in a million years thought would come out of my mouth. Leave it to Emma to make me do things I normally wouldn't.

My heart raced in my chest.

She may not have meant it the way I have but it didn't matter because hearing her tell me she loved me was all I needed.

That was another thing about having a crush on your best friend; the I love you's were up for interpretation.

I placed the phone on my chest and let my arms sprawl out on the bed. Whatever sleepiness I had left my body, there was no way I could go to bed now.

So instead, I let my mind roam but this time, willingly. I let my thoughts free fall through a million different possibilities as the night turned to day. 

I watched the sun rise.

And I smiled.

Because falling in love with my best friend was messy and complicated and heart-shattering. But it was also full of excitement and exhilaration and anticipation.

It was rollercoaster of emotions, full of ups and downs and twist and turns and even loops, but that's what made it thrilling. And for the first time in my normal life, I had something to keep me on my toes.

And I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Was my best friend also in love with me? I didn't know. Would I ever know? Maybe, maybe not. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't at least a little curious to know how she feels, be it good or bad. Maybe someday I'll ask her. Maybe I'll get to hold her. Maybe she'll never speak to me again.

But until then, all I had were the stories I've made up in my mind.

(More fics!)

betting on you

summary: your date doesn’t go to plan, and Jake won’t stand for that.

warnings: a gross date

word count: 2.6k

Your life, described in one word, was chaotic. Being friends with an entire professional hockey roster tended to have that effect. Not that you really minded, especially with the company you usually kept. 

More often than not, there was at least one hockey player on your couch. Sometimes you regretted letting them know where you kept your spare key—you couldn't count how many times you’d come home from work and had a heart attack seeing someone already on your couch. 

But there were nights, like tonight, when the boys were invited over, that you enjoyed their company the most. Currently, Elias, Brock, and Jake were sitting around your kitchen table as you bounced around the room in an effort to cook them dinner as a thank you for always leaving you tickets for their games.

“You’ve got a text.” Brock called, your phone sitting on the table beside him. 

“Who’s it from?” You questioned, hands too busy with putting the chicken in the oven to check it yourself. Though, when Brock spoke next you wished you had just waited a moment to figure out for yourself.

“John, uh, he wants to know if Friday at eight works.” Brock told you, a bit of hesitation in his voice as his gaze flicked to Jake for a moment. Your whole body tensed and you practically lunged across the room to get your phone back, all the while avoiding the questioning glances from the three boys. 

“So you’ve got a date?” Elias asked, and you would’ve hissed at him to shut up, but it’s Petey, and you’re pretty sure he’s the sweetest guy you’ve ever met, so instead, you just flush completely. It was answer enough, though, because suddenly the Minnesota native was wearing a teasing grin.

“Oh my god, you have a date!” Brock all but shouts, raising the beer bottle he’d been sipping and gesturing it towards you like he was cheering. You were certain that by now you looked like a tomato, and with all three boys looking at you, you shrunk into yourself and typed furiously on your phone.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” You finally found your voice, and Brock just laughed heartily at how defensive you got. The boys then started making teasing comments about John, and you completely ignored them because there were three boys sitting at the table but only two were talking. Which was something, because you couldn’t remember the last time Jake had ever been so quiet.

“So is it a first date?” Brock questioned, his chin propped up on his hand as he grinned at you. He was having way too much fun at your expense, and you made a mental note to get back at him later. You mustered up a nod, setting your phone down on the counter after confirming your plans with John.

“How’d you meet?” Elias asked, being ever the gentleman. Once again, your whole body flushed in embarrassment at his question. Jake still was silent, brows furrowed and expression unreadable.

“Um, Tinder.” You offered meekly, finding the veggies you had roasting on the stove suddenly very interesting. It wasn’t necessarily embarrassing that you were on the app, but it was awkward admitting to it surrounded by three guys who probably never would never have to use Tinder to get a date.

Plus, the massive crush you had on Jake probably didn’t help the redness of your cheeks. One wine night with your friends led to you downloading the app in a last ditch effort to get over the hockey player. Now, you were regretting it. Brock was giggling at you, and Petey was trying his best to suppress his grin. You couldn't even look at Jake, until—

“You can’t go on a date with him.” His voice was firm, and for the first time since this whole debacle started, all heads snapped to him. You spun on your heel to face him, and still the look on his face was unreadable.

“And why the hell not?” You questioned, arms crossed and brow raised. You weren't looking for a fight, but Jake was absolutely in no position to tell you whether or not you could see someone.

“Because Tinder guys suck.” He had a point, but your embarrassment had switched to stubbornness, and with the way Brock and Elias were looking between you and Jake like this was the most amusing thing they had ever witnessed, you weren’t about to back down.

“Not all of them.” You mumbled, features softening as you leaned back against the stove. You kicked yourself for the way your heart skipped a beat as you briefly wondered if him caring about whether or not you were going on dates meant something, but you quickly realized you were wrong as Jake spoke next.

“Let’s make a bet.” 

“Oh, it's getting interesting now.” Brock murmured, but neither you nor Jake broke the eye contact you’d been holding since he first spoke., and you quirked a brow at him to continue. 

“If your date goes bad, you have to be my personal chef for a week.” Jake started, and you rolled your eyes. You’d probably end up cooking for him anyways, but you weren't about to point that out and end up with a worse punishment—not that you thought the date would end badly, of course. 

“And when the date works out?” You prompted, one corner of Jake’s lips twitching up at your sentence. 

“If it works out, I’ll get you and James—”

“John.”

“—ice level seats to the next home game.” Jake finished, and you could tell from the smirk on his face that he had intentionally messed up the name and was proud of himself for it. 

“Really?” You questioned. You tried to ignore the fact that you really didn't want to go to a game with John, because that meant bringing him around the boys and though you loved them all dearly, you knew they could all be a bit much. 

Plus, the idea of introducing John to Jake made your stomach twist.

“Really.” Jake nodded, leaning back into his chair. For the first time in a moment, you spared a glance to the other two men sitting at the table. Elias was trying, and failing, to hide his amused grin. Brock on the other hand, was extending no such curtesy. He was clearly entertained, and you briefly wondered if you should offer him some popcorn to go with the show you and Jake were putting on.

“Fine. Deal.” You said before you even really knew it. You were oozing false confidence, but none of them needed to know that. Jake grinned, but you didn't see it as you turned back to the food on the stove. 

You figured that the date would go okay, maybe it’d be a little awkward but soon you'd either grow to like him or you'd part ways after the game that Jake promised. 

Except. 

Nothing seemed to go right. Firstly, John had picked some fancy restaurant, which, though it wasn't your style at all, would’ve been fine. But then he kept making comments like how a guy needed to spend a ton of money to get someone to put out and how the top you were wearing was the same color as his sheets—which was followed by an invitation to find out for yourself. 

Your favorite was when the waitress had left the table after taking drink orders and he had the audacity to turn to you and make a comment about how he wondered if she’d go home with the two of you if he asked. 

You got up and left before he could say anything else.

Once you were in your car, you took a moment to catch your breath and bask in just how awful the date had been. Before you really even knew it, your phone was in your hand and you were dialing the one number you knew you could count on no matter what.

“Jake.” You breathed the moment the line connected, not giving him a second to question why you were calling when you were supposed to be on the date. “If you say anything about that stupid bet I will hang up. Okay?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever. Are you okay? Do you need me to come get you?” Jake’s concerned voice sounded from your phone's speaker and the corner of your lips turned upwards at the sound. 

“I’m fine, I drove myself.” You explained with a shake of your head. You leaned back, relaxed from just having Jake on the other end of the line. It was scary, how much he meant to you and how hard getting over him was proving to be. John wasn’t the first guy you’d gone out with since you started trying to shift your affection away from Jake, and even the guys that were total gentlemen never seemed to work. Nothing was as easy as it was with Jake.

“Are you still there?” He asked after a moment of silence on your end. 

“Yeah, sorry. Just in my head.” You muttered, feeling absolutely defeated after the way the past twenty minutes had played out. 

“Come to mine, we can watch a movie or something.” Jake offered, causing the corner of your lips to quirk up. The idea seemed infinitely better than anything else you could have done, so it was easy for you to agree. 

“I’m on my way.” He told you to drive safe, and you hung up, fastening your seatbelt with a grin. The drive was quick and uneventful, the radio playing quietly as your mind went wild with all the ways Jake was probably going to tease you. 

By the time you were at his apartment, you had figured that he’d make a show of how you lost the bet, maybe even draw up a plan for you to get groceries for him to cook. He'd more than likely threaten to beat up John, and though you knew it was for your benefit, you knew Jake wouldn't exactly be happy about how he acted. 

And for the second time that night, what you assumed would happen was completely wrong. 

You knocked on Jake’s door and it took him a moment to answer, but when he did you were met with an unexpected sight. Your best friend was there, but instead of the sweatpants and t-shirt he usually wore around the house, he had on a pair of dress pants and a nice button-up. His sleeves were rolled up, and you pretended that you totally didn't eye his tattoos the second you spotted his exposed forearm.

“What’re you dressed up for?” You questioned, seeing as Jake was just looking at you with a sheepish look on his face. You were certain that you were imaging the slight blush on his cheeks, and as he stepped aside to let you in, he still hadn't spoken. “You didn’t have plans, did you?”

“No, I, uh—okay, listen.” He stuttered, hand tugging through his hair and eyes bouncing everywhere across the room but you. His actions concerned you, Jake was not a nervous guy, so whatever he was about to say clearly had an impact on him. 

“Jake?” You prompted after a moment of silence. You knew he was trying to collect his thoughts, but you were getting anxious to hear what he had to say.

“So I know your date was bad, but that must be, like, an understatement, because it's only half an hour past your reservation.” He started, and your eyes widened a bit as you realized he remembered when the date was supposed to start. “And I wanted you to have a good time, so, I figured, we could, if you want, have a date night here?”

He was blushing, and his words were rushed, but you had heard him loud and clear. Your heart was racing as you contemplated the reasoning behind his actions, certain that you are reading too much into things. Jake had never hinted that he wanted anything more than a friendship with you, and friends cheer each up other after bad dates, right? 

But the way he was acting, and the way he simply said date night seemed to imply so much more than your typical movie nights or dinners. And usually the other guys were there, too.

“Why?” You found yourself asking on. Of the dozens of thoughts that were running through your mind, the only thing you were able to ask was why. You felt stupid for it, but something was telling you that there was a reason for his behavior. 

“I, uh, I might really like you.” Jake muttered, and suddenly you felt like the two feet separating you from him was entirely too much. He finally settled his gaze on you, and you could see the worry in his eyes. You probably should’ve said something right away, but you were too caught off guard by his confession to formulate actual words.

Panic had clearly set in on his face, blue eyes searching your expression for any hint of a reaction. You cracked a grin, and the simple action had some of the tension visibly leaving Jake’s body. You took a few steps forward, standing before him and his hands instantly landed on your waist. His grip kept you in place, not that you planned on moving away anytime soon. 

“Please say something.” He breathed, a hint of a chuckle at the end of his plea. Words were failing you, the feeling of Jake’s touch and the smell of his cologne practically turning your mind to mush. Instead, you wrapped a hand around the back of his neck and pulled him down to connect your lips in a long-awaited kiss. You could tell by the way his hands gripped your waist tighter and tugged you closer that he wanted the kiss just as much as you did. When you pulled away, Jake’s grin was as wide as you’d ever seen. “I was going to ask you if you kiss on the first date, but I guess I know.”

“Shut up.” You mumbled, leaning in to peck his lips again. It was a bit clumsy, with how wide you both were smiling, but you wouldn’t have traded it for anything in the world. The two of you were lost in each other, wrapped around the other and grinning like fools for who knows how long. That was, until, you pulled away just enough that your senses weren’t completely clouded by Jake. “Is something burning?” His eyes grew wide, and he all but knocked you out of the way as he raced to the kitchen. You followed after him, not trusting him if there was an actual emergency. 

“I was going to make dinner.” Jake pouted. Apparently, what had been burning was the spaghetti sauce he was going to make, and you couldn’t help but giggle. He shot a playful glare in your direction, but that did nothing to stop your amusement at the whole situation. You were pretty sure the only reason he even had a jar of sauce in his pantry was because you had left it there last time you cooked for him. 

“We can get takeout.” You reasoned, stepping into Jake and wrapping your arms around his torso. “I’ll even let you pick what we get since you’ve been so sweet.” Jake chuckled, and you felt the vibrations from where your cheek was pressed against his chest. He pulled back a bit, his forefinger tilting your chin up so he could connect your lips once more. 

“Takeout can wait.” He mumbled, and before he could deepen the kiss like you knew he was planning to do, you slipped out of his grip. He pouted again, and you chuckled at his adorable expression, even if he was being a bit childish. 

“Not so fast, Virtanen. You’ve got to buy me dinner first.”

dancing hearts | [b.b]

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: there’s an app that’s all the rage, and Bucky wants no part in it.

Word Count: 1828 (a pretty solid word count, if i do say so myself)

Author’s note: before y’all ask, yes i did made a tiktok one shot. it was like a given. but this one shot is inspired by that trend where you record your s/o looking at you while dancing, and I know that’s something bucky would do. as always, I enjoy the feedback you guys give me ♡

Warnings: centenarian steve doing the savage dance (it’s canon). some tooth-rotting fluff, it’s lowkey sickening. oodles and oodles of fluff, i promise

You knew you shouldn't have succumbed to the pleas of Peter and Shuri. But here you were, downloading an app that rewards people in recording themselves doing funny videos, and dances as well.

At first, you only used tiktok to just watch others, but then you started toying with features. As a SHIELD agent, you would sometimes record videos of you giving tours of the Stark building, and many people enjoyed that content. When your audience found out that you also worked alongside the Avengers, they begged you to find a way to include them in videos. 

It was no easy feat. At first, you would just videotape your friends while they’re working out, or if they had the time, a “day in the life of” type of clip, or you would film an occasional prank video, which the viewers would eat up.

The videos that would garner the most views, however, were the dancing videos. Yes, it is true that you got your ‘very serious and adult’ friends to do funny renditions of Savage and Say So. People could not believe that someone as old as Sam can do the splits, but yet, there he was. 

Another niche that your fans enjoyed was videos of you teaching the Avengers the popular dances. When you taught Steve the dance to Savage, he had stormed off grumbling how it’s ‘indecent’ and ‘humiliating.’ He did come back to finish the dance, though, and might you add, he did slightly better than you.

From duets with Peter, to breaking out in dance at the gym with Natasha, everyone enjoyed doing the dances with you. All except one.

You always knew Bucky was a serious one, but you have seen him crack a smile or two. And you have seen him shimmy once in a while when you played music in the kitchen. But for some reason, he was not fond of this new trend that was making waves throughout the Avengers compound. 

It’s not like you’re secretly recording him or anything. You ask everyone beforehand if they mind being recorded. But it seems like he doesn't want to do it, point blank. Steve says it might be because he’s just not a fan of being the center of attention. Sam thinks it because Bucky’s afraid to admit that he sucks at dancing. 

And today was no exception. It was a day off for the Avengers, so you thought this was prime time for some new footage of your friends dancing. You had decided you wanted to teach one of the harder dances, and just make a video out of the many times he might mess up.

You made your way to the kitchen and started to greet everyone. Your eyes landed on Bucky, who was at the kitchen island, eating Pad Thai. You softly said hello, and Bucky looked up. He had a small grin and politely waved hello. He offered his seat next to him, and told you to help yourself to some of his leftovers, which you happily agree to.

Despite ‘hating’ your ‘antics,’ Bucky was more than happy to hang out with you during lunch time. About ninety percent of the time, he’s pretty cold and broody, but the other ten percent he’s a pleasure to be around.

You kind of wished you knew what went on inside his head, simply on the basis that you like him. It’d be nice to know if you liking him was worth it. 

As you got your fair share of Pad Thai, you asked him if he wanted to do a video with him. A lot of your audience wanted to see the Winter Soldier in action, busting some moves.

Bucky nodded his head, “it’s not my cup of tea, doll. Why would I do something as ridiculous as that?” 

You frowned slightly. “There’s no harm in having a little fun, Buck.”

“Yeah, well, I just don’t wanna do it.” He then left his seat to the island to go sit at the kitchen table to finish his lunch.

You narrowed your eyes towards Bucky, not caring enough to argue over something small. He’ll come around eventually. 

Almost immediately, Steve walked into the kitchen, and your face lit up. You asked him if he was busy. He hesitated while saying no, but it didn’t matter. You told him he was going to take part in a dancing video.

Steve complained slightly, as the other Avengers started cheering him on to do it. You propped your phone against the fruit basket on the island, the camera facing towards the living room and kitchen table, with New York in the background.

You hit record and started guiding Steve along with the song. It was an upbeat song and it wasn’t long that he started to get the hang of it. Recording took no longer than 20 minutes, but you quickly got to editing the video. Once done, you posted it, excited to see your followers’ reaction. 

You took a quick snack break and decided to see the comments of the video. Everyone loved it: comments ranging from adoration to slightly thirsty for Captain America. You showed the comment section to Steve, and he couldn’t stop cracking up. 

Then there was a top comment that was gaining popularity. Steve read it while slightly smirking, and decided to show it to you. “Check it out,” Steve said, “looks like people are spotting an admirer.”

You were confused at what he was talking about, and that’s when you saw the comment:

mary: has anyone noticed Bucky in the background?! He keeps looking at y/n with heart eyes! 

Sure enough, when you went back to look at the footage, you saw that Bucky was feigning eating his lunch, whilst staring at you, albeit with his heart fluttering. 

You thought the gesture was endearing, and it only made you wonder more if Bucky really thought of you in that way. It was time to get the bottom of it. 

 “Hey Buck, is it okay if I record here? The lighting is better, but I just wanna make sure I’m not intruding,” you said with slight concern. 

Bucky smiled at you, “you’ll never intrude on me, Doll. You can have as much or as little sunlight when you’re around me.”

You giggled like a schoolgirl and went on with your plan. You decided to place your phone by a pile of books on the kitchen table where Bucky was sitting, inconspicuously flipping the camera so that it was facing him. 

The song that you decided to ‘record’ was an upbeat and fun one, and you’ve already learned the dance. There had been a challenge going around that you would film your significant other reacting to you dancing said song, and it was very popular. However, you didn’t have a significant other, but Bucky was definitely a close second. 

As the song started playing, Bucky’s eyes started to light up and became very interested as to how you were going to dance to it. His head started bobbing along to the song, mouthing some of the lyrics. 

Then it got to the chorus. You started doing the moves along with the song, and Bucky’s face said it all. He was enamored. He started to cheer you on, mimicking the moves you were doing, and clapping once you finished your little dance number. 

As you finished your dance, your phone finished recording and saved the video to your photo album. You took a seat at the kitchen table and quickly skimmed the video. Your cheeks started burning red as you captured a moment of Bucky smiling really big while you were dancing.

You kept replaying the video when Bucky called your name. “How’s the video looking, sweetheart?” he asked as he tried to read your face.

 Your face started to go red again. You didn’t think you would get this far. Your mind started racing and tried to think of anything, anything, to cover up your true motives.

“I… the video didn’t come out as good as I thought,” you replied in a high-pitched voice. 

“Doesn’t sound too convincing, doll,” Bucky questioned as he got up from his chair and slowly started making his way towards you. 

You hid your phone behind your back, trying to back away from Bucky’s extended hand.

“Doll, I just want to see the video, it can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, but it is, I can’t show you,” you tried to argue. 

Bucky started advancing much faster, and had you cornered by the kitchen wall. He put one arm above your head, and stared right through your lies.

“And why is it bad?” Bucky inquired.

You took a deep breath, while also making the mistake of inhaling Bucky’s cologne. His fresh pine scent started making you dizzy, knees almost bucking at the sight before you.

“It’s just…” you started. “The last video I made with Steve, someone noticed you in the background looking at me, and they said it looked endearing.”

When Bucky didn’t respond, you continued, “I didn’t believe it so I did the challenge where I record myself dancing, I recorded you looking at me dancing.”

“Is that so?” Bucky said as he broke into a small.

“I’m really sorry Bucky,” you replied with a small whisper, “If you want, I’ll delete it immediately. I wasn’t planning on posting it or anything.” 

“Then what exactly were you going to do with the video?” Bucky asked as he raised an eyebrow.

You gulped. Well, it’s now or fucking never.

“.... cherish it,” You said sheepishly, “I thought you looked really cute when you were cheering me on with my dumb dances that you hate.”

Bucky’s face softened. “Didn’t know you thought that fondly of me, doll. Also, your dances aren’t dumb. I just… I’m a bad dancer.” 

You started laughing. “Lucky for you, we both have the rest of the day off to practice… if that’s okay with you?”

Bucky kissed your forehead, “of course it’s fine… after I take on a little dinner date, though.”

“Deal.” 

You and Bucky embraced each other, taking in each other. You gave him a peck on the cheek and then Peter came running in.

“Hey guys! Shuri’s here and she wants to teach you a new dance!” he chirped as he was running out of breath. “It’s called the renegade dance, do you guys wanna take part in it?”

You turned to Bucky, who then flashed his smile. “Of course, kid. But let Shuri know that me and my girl over here are gonna crush you guys at it.”

Peter’s eyes widened and took a glance towards both of you. 

“... uhhhh no. But this is still a lot to process,” and with that he left the kitchen.

“What do you say, Y/N... Can I have this dance?” Bucky asked, extending his arm.

“It’d be an honor, Buck,” you replied, taking his hand and making your way outside.

907

Are you one of those lucky people to own a walk-in closet? lol lucky people. No I don’t have one of those. Is there a random object you own that has a huge personal significance? Well it’s more significant today because we had our virtual graduation this morning... so I’ll go with my graduation sash. Ever since I started university I’ve always wanted to wear my own sash in a physical ceremony so again, it sucks that our batch got affected by the pandemic. Do you use Google? For just about everything, yeah. Would you like to go swimming right now? That would be soooooo so nice. I’ve been going through old vacation photos and I really miss the beach. Can you play electric guitar? Nope.

Do you have an HDTV? My parents do. When was the last time you drank something through a straw? Around a month ago when my dad bought milk teas for me and my sister. Have you ever tried to teach yourself a different language? I didn’t teach myself per se, but I have tried my hand learning Spanish on Duolingo several times. It always comes in phases – I get passionate about learning and use the app for weeks, then it kinda burns out after a while. Right now I haven’t used it since I got sick in May. How long was your last phone call? A little longer than an hour, I think. It was pure silence though; we just wanted to hear each other’s surroundings. Do you need to repaint your nails? No, I never get it painted. Has there ever been a horoscope that came true for you? Psh. Are you a fan of industrial metal? Holy shit I feel so stupid right now. I thought this was referring to a literal kind of metal and I thought, that is such an odd thing to be a fan of...Google quickly taught me that it is in fact NOT a material for building infrastructure jdsskfjskf. Anyway, no I am not a fan. Are you one of those people who chew two pieces of gum, not one? Yeah, occasionally. I don’t like how one piece loses flavor all too quickly so I go ahead and pop two in. Do you have a wall calendar? Not since 2008. We only had a wall calendar in our old house; when we moved here we started to rely on digital clocks and our phones to tell the time. Have you ever taken the pictures from a calendar and used them as posters? I haven’t had a calendar like that, so no. I’ve done this with magazines though. Can you handle the cold? Hahaha no, I can’t. I was already in so much pain in 20ºC weather in Sagada, and I fared much worse in 12ºC Japan weather. I would still pick living in a colder climate in a heartbeat over a tropical one, though. Have you ever been to Canada? Nope.  Do you believe in superstitions? Just one superstition involving my university that doubles as an inside joke, so it’s not like I take it 100% seriously. It’s a generations-old joke that’s impossible to ignore if you’re a student, so I just jumped in. When was the last time you took a taxi somewhere? It was from the airport to back home, but I forgot where we landed from. Bohol I think? Palawan? I don’t even know anymore. It was so inconvenient I begged my dad that we stop using taxis as transportation for our future trips. Would you ever join the army, airforce or navy? No. How old is the person you last kissed? 22. Is there a friend that you can always rely on to get you out of a jam? I don’t think so. When it comes down to it they all have their own different things going on and I can’t just call them whenever and expect them to come to me, and that’s okay. Generally though, I think my most reliable friends are probably Andrew and Angela. What was the most embarassing thing you've had to buy? I’ve never felt embarrassed by anything I had to buy, but it can get a little uncomfortable trying to buy napkins when my dress or pants are already soaked. I get over it quickly though, since menstruations are normal lol. Have you ever tried to balance the light switch between off and on? When I was a kid. I haven’t tried it in a while. Do you believe in ghosts / supernatural occurences? They’re fun to think about, sure, and I do enjoy watching the supernatural episodes of Buzzfeed Unsolved where they go ghost-hunting. I like to think that they somehow exist, but I still also very much maintain my skepticism at all times. Have you ever mistaken a person's gender? I’ve used the wrong pronouns accidentally but I always correct myself and apologize once I’ve noticed my blunder. What was the most expensive thing you've broken? My old iPhones. I’ve also sported a few dents on my car, but I wouldn’t say I broke the car. Has anyone texted you yet today? Not text, but online chat. We had our virtual graduation this morning so my inbox was swamped with congratulatory messages and such. Did you stay calm during the whole swine flu scare? I did, but I mean I was 11 and had no clue how serious it was supposed to be. I remember cheering when they suspended classes for a week because of a local swine flu case, so yep – still ignorant back then. Is there a light on in the room you're currently in? There is, but it isn’t turned on. Are your feet touching the floor? Nope, they’re on the bed. Have you ever been in a car accident? Mild ones, nothing too life-threatening. Do you usually make back-up plans? Yeah man I’m so anxious I always have at least plans A-C lined up in my head and ready to go whenever necessary. Can you focus well in high-stress situations? Usually. Without the aid of mascara, do you have long eyelashes? I do. I get compliments on it all the time too. I didn’t realize it was apparently a nice feature to have until more and more people pointed it out haha. Is there a kind of music you listen to that helps you release your anger? Yeah I have a playlist that’s lined up with all of my favorite loud, angry punk rock music specifically for when I’m pissed off. Are you one of those people who keep their feelings bottled up? I can, particularly whenever I feel like it’s not worth it to blow up. Is one of your friends extremely odd but you love them regardless? Not really. Aya’s pretty weird but I wouldn’t call her extremely odd. Is there anyone you dread going into public with? My mom when she’s mad. Are you a victim of writing run-on sentences? For the most part, I wouldn’t say so. If I write a run-on sentence it’s almost always in an informal setting where I’m more loose with punctuation, like if I’m chatting on IM or writing an answer on here. Still, I try to avoid them and I never do it in a formal situation. Graffiti: an art or an act of vandalism? They can be both. Some people who genuinely just want to fuck around vandalize, like how I’ve seen “Mark <3 Erica” in spray paint on public walls or some similar shit lol. But a lot of graffiti are art as well; many have important messages or symbolisms to say. Do you buy things online? I’ve done it a few times. Not regularly. I like being able to see and touch something before buying it. Are you easily frightened? I definitely am but at the same time I’m really into horror movies and serial killers and a ghost-hunting series? Hahaha it’s weird. I guess I enjoy the thrill that comes with having those interests. Do you have a favorite model? Over the years I’ve loved Elizabeth Jane Bishop, Kiko Mizuhara, Taylor Marie Hill, Gigi Hadid, Bella Hadid, and (controversial pick!) Kendall Jenner. Have you ever watched Titanic? So many times. Honestly, one of my favorites. What's your current facebook display picture of? It’s my official graduation photo wearing my graduation sash! :) I finally changed it last Friday after I got the email saying I’m on the list of graduates. How about your IM display picture? My main IM is my Messenger, which also uses my Facebook photo. Is there anyone whose hair you envy? Gabie’s for one. Hers is really smooth and silky and wavy. Would you act in a movie if it offered a role? If I was going to be a mostly unseen extra in a blockbuster film and still be paid like $600 for it, then I don’t see why I wouldn’t take it. Does speaking in front of people make you nervous? Only if there’s going to be an unscripted aspect to it that’ll make me have to come up with answers on the spot, like miting de avances or thesis defense. If I have a script or even just a general gist of what I want to say, I have no problem improvising and speaking in front of a crowd. Can you read in a moving vehicle or does it make you sick? It makes me sick but it hasn’t stopped me before. Have you ever dated someone who was extremely shy? I’m the extremely shy person... Or have you dated someone who took things too fast? I felt that way with Gab at first when she wanted to have sex like two months after we started dating, though I was scared mainly because it was going to be my first time and I wanted to make sure I was comfortable. Now that I’m a little older, two months seems like a healthy amount of time. Does the idea of driving 220 mph sound exciting to you? Sounds terrifying. It could be fun, but only if we’re in the middle of nowhere where there’s loads of space to go that fast and no chance of crashing. Everyone has a weakness, what's yours? Food. Do you or anyone you know have an account on Deviantart? I had classmates in high school who had accounts but I’m not sure if they still have it, or if Deviantart is even still as active as I knew it to be. Thoughts on the Dunkin Donut commercial that says "America runs on Dunkin'"?  It’s a creative slogan but if I was American I wouldn’t want a doughnut place claiming to represent my country. It cute though. Do you bother buying movies on DVD anymore or do you just download them? I watch them on Netflix, which is still technically like buying them since we pay for the subscription anyway. Do you listen to Daughtry? No. Do you get your eyebrows waxed? I don’t. Waxing looks so painful to me. How do you take your coffee? Lots of creamer or milk, a little sugar. I like trying out different coffees, but when I’m simply relaxing I do want my coffee as least bitter as possible.  If you have a dog, what breed is it? I have an aspin mix, though we never figured out what Kimi’s other half is. And I also have a beagle. Have you found someone who makes you unconditionally happy? I don’t know if 'unconditionally’ is possible but yes, I do have people who make me very happy. Do you have a friend who always seems to be dying their hair? Not anymore. Jo used to dye her hair like every month though and she must have been able to go through the entire rainbow. She looked sooo good in each of the colors. Would you swap names with a friend? I love all their names but I don’t see why that would be necessary. Do you plan on going to university? I did. I graduated today. Guys who wear muscle shirts, yes or no? Idk man, they can wear whatever they want. Are you a fan of Carrie Underwood? No. I liked some of her singles when I was younger, but I’m not a fan in that I have her albums and know her lesser-known songs. Do you make playlists on iTunes? I used to, when I still used iTunes. I make playlists on Spotify now. Have you ever forgotten someone's birthday? I don’t think so. Are you scared of being left behind? Yessir. I’m super competitive, so I hate the feeling. Do you remember your last dream? No. I’m really bad at remembering them unless they’re nightmares or insanely strange. I do know that I dreamt while we were watching mass earlier on the television though, hahaha. Do you know someone who is an obsessed Star Wars fan? So many people in my circle are. Is politics something you don't care about? No. If there’s anything I give tons of fucks about, it’s that. What's a movie/tvshow/book/series that is way overrated? I’ll go with the first things I thought of...in that order: To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before; Stranger Things (it’s good, but not as good as people hyped it to be); I don’t really read anymore; and what do you mean by series? Just realized I only gave 2 out of 4 answers lol oh well. Do you think Barbie presents an unhealthy image to young girls? I don’t like how its physical features are still unrealistic; but I appreciate their attempts at diversity. I can’t say it was upsetting seeing a Filipino-themed Barbie :) Is there a pet that you desperately want? All I ever wanted were dogs, and now I’ve got two of them. Would you ever get your bellybutton pierced? Nope. Are you musically talented? Hahahahaha Have you ever shot a gun? Not a real one, so no. Athenna’s dad had this practice gun he used for target practice (duh) and I messed with that a few times. Do you have a friend that always changes their mind last second? That’s Gabie. She’s lucky she’s my girlfriend and that I love her, because it’s actually a big pet peeve of mine. Are you not afraid to voice your opinion? Yup. The only time I don’t say it out loud is if it’s unnecessary and if it’s going to be simply disrespectful. An example would be when my uncle offered to make me a carrot cake for my grad gift, and I just said yes because it was already generous enough for him to offer me a free cake when he runs a food business. In reality it’s not my favorite cake at all; it wouldn’t even be in my top 20. Are you one of those people who are always pushing their limits? Yes, I definitely overwork myself to the point of exhaustion and burnout. But I honestly prefer doing things and being busy than sitting around. Is there a word that you will always find humorous? Bubbling. Because Drake and Josh.

Do you frown upon immature people? Typically. Have you ever slipped on ice and hurt yourself? This may have happened to me once or twice when I was still regularly visiting the ice skating rink at the mall. People were always super nice and helped me get up, though. Do you try to have an intimidating impression? I don’t try. Apparently it’s naturally the vibe I give off. Living in the big city or chilling in the country? BIG CITY. Always the big city. I’ve gone to the country/province so many times; I already know what it’s like there. I’ll always prefer a noisy city. No one seems to obey the legal drinking age, do they? Hahahaha a lot seem not to. I know so many high school kids who’ve had a drink before turning 18. Do you like your country's flag? Sure. I like that we can switch up the colors depending on if we’re at war or not. Have you ever made a totally amazing snow fort? I’ve never even seen snow before. Do you use Bounty Paper Towels? No. Are you the one usually behind the camera or the one in the picture? BEHIND If you get married, will you have a traditional wedding? Traditional, yes. Religious, no. Do you feel you’re slowly losing one of your friends? No. But now that I’m no longer in school, I really hope I’ll continue to be friends with my orgmates. I’ll certainly keep in touch as much as I can. If you draw, what's one thing you always have trouble with? Everything about it. Is there someone you know moving away any time soon? No. I do know my friend’s sister had already moved and started her new job in California, but when the pandemic started she had to go back here. This virus is just ruining so many great things for everyone, man... Allergic to anything? Nope. How many cars have you owned? Zero. I drive one; can’t say I own it because my parents bought it. What are you going to do after this? Maybe take another survey.

Stranger Danger pt. 1

Pairing: namjoon x y/n

Genre: tinder!au, nonidol!namjoon

Word Count: 1.5k

Warning: badly written fluff, mentions of some mature themes, smut (in the future) and a best friend that is too sweet for anything

Summary: The one where your gay best friend forces you to download a dating app and you match with a tall boy who loves crabs.

A/N: I am trying hard to get content out but I have been preparing to go back to school and get my master’s so bear with me please. Thank you for reading my works and I hope to have a second part come out soon. Love you all XOXO.

“Come on and just download it, you have nothing to lose here.”, the nagging voice of Hoseok practically shouts from the kitchen. It has been five years since you have been on a date and frankly both you and Hoseok are both done with your bitching and moaning. You two have lived together for those five years and he is tired of hearing you complain about how single you are. “Yeah, okay, but, what if I match with someone and they turn out to be a completely crazy psycho-killer?”. The look he gives you incredulous and it was like he could see right through the bullshit story you were giving him.

“You are a twenty year old woman. You should be able to tell when someone is a complete and total maniac.”, his voice was sort of shrill as he began to feel frustration with you. 

“If you think it’s so easy why do you just make my account for me then?” The short moment after that sentence came out of your mouth Hoseok’s smile grew into a devious one and his hand was quick to grab at your phone and shove it in your face to unlock it. Your panic sat in as you began to realize you just left your phone in the hands of your best friend and you know that he is going to make the account as ridiculous as possible. 

“Wait!” You call out as you try to reach for your phone in his grasp but he begins to stand up and put the phone over his head. “You better sit your dick deprived ass down while I try to find you someone.” His voice was stern and he held a glare in his eyes. It was like he was trying to test you and knew that he was going to win as soon you sat down. “Please don’t put anything embarrassing like ‘horny single in your area that is waiting to get dicked down by a monster cock’ because if you do I am going to cry and unfriend you.”, your cheeks were red as you continued to ramble to him. “I’m not a pimp.” He gasped in fake horror as he continued to make your account. “You’re acting like one.” You mumbled as you started to chew on the inside of your cheeks in anticipation. In no less than five minutes he hands the phone back to you and wipes off his brow like he was working hard. “You should be able to get a match soon...Do you know how hard it was to have your account not scream ‘desperate been single for too long’?” He moves his hands theatrically. 

 You blush in embarrassment and roll your eyes,”Don’t be homophobic.” You laugh as he looks at you like you are an idiot. “Bitch, how? I’m gay as hell...I’ve been out of that damn closet since I was fourteen.” He puts his hands on his hips and shakes his head. The sound of your phone dinging brings you both out of your small bickering and has him rushing to grab it. “Hey!?”, you call out as he snatches the phone and unlocks it. “‘GoldenJeon97 has sent you a friend request’”, he wiggles his brow as he reads the notification off to you. Hearing him read that off to you makes your heart race and your hands begin to get sweaty. “Are you going to accept it?”, your voice shakes. There is no reason as to why you should be getting nervous but here you are, acting like you are going on a date for the first time. 

Your best friend hands the phone back to you and has it opens to your DM’s. “Go on and open it.” You shakily open the DM and quickly close it in disgust, “Never mind,” you mumble “I don’t need to add him back anyways.” You close the app and sigh as you put your head down into your lap in despair. “I am never going to find someone like this.” Hoseok has never heard you sound that in need and sad before, it was almost like his heart broke just even hearing you. “Give it some time.” His voice is calm and sweet as he rubs your back. You never normally cry over something trivial like this but you can’t stop the flow of tears as you start to hiccup. “I don’t know why guys won’t talk to me and if they do it’s because they want me to suck their shrimp dicks.” You wail as you blow your nose into the elbow of your sweater. You shouldn’t even be crying over something like this because you just downloaded the app but you just can’t help it.

Hoseok sighs and then claps his hands together, “You know what?” You lift your head up and wipe off your snot covered nose,”What?” He smiles and grabs your phone. “Let’s go get something to eat and drink, maybe that will cheer you up.” He pulls you up off of the couch and drags you to the door so you can slip on your slides. You both finally leave the apartment and set off to go to a small sports bar that is less than two blocks away.

You two stay out for a few hours and then come back as soon as you start to show signs of being drunk or at least a little bit tipsy. You hold onto Hoseok’s hand as he carefully walks you back to the apartment. “Hobi”, you whine, “I don’t want to go home.” You sounded like a little child who didn’t want to leave the park and it was quite endearing to him. “We have to go home or else we can’t watch a movie together.” He tries bargaining with you and you slowly give in. It takes you less than ten minutes to get home and for him to practically drag you into your room. “Okay, sweetie,” he talks to you softly knowing you cry easily whilst being drunk, “I need you to change into pajamas while I go make some popcorn for us and I will come back in here. Okay?” You nod your head and watch as he leaves out of the room and you smile.

You quickly change into your clothes and plop yourself down onto your bed as you wait for Hoseok with a smile on your face. You didn’t know how you could be so lucky to get a best friend like him but look what happened. He comes back in his pajamas and with a large bowl of kettle corn for you two to share. You guys finally get arranged on the bed and watch the movie in silence until you start to speak up. “Hobi?”, your voice is small as you begin to talk. “Yeah?” His eyes don’t leave the screen but you can still tell that he is listening to you. “If I was gay I would date you.” You slur slightly and put your head on his shoulder. He chuckles and shakes his head,”I’m sure you would but it doesn’t work like that.” He smiles and then goes back to being silent. He has dealt with you being like this a plethora of times before and he doesn’t even get fazed by it anymore because he knows that you mean no harm. 

The movie finally ends and he looks down at you with a smile as he notices that you fell asleep. He gets up carefully and makes sure to tuck you in before leaving the room. His heart feels for you but he knows that you are going to find someone that will make you smile...he can feel it. The next morning comes quickly and you wake up groaning. It has been a while since you went out drinking like that but you can’t help but feel a little better about everything. You grab your phone and quickly check it to see fourteen more friend requests but one in particular stands out to you. “MonieKNJ” you mumbled the name but can’t help feel like that name is really familiar. You quickly add him back along with everyone else. Finally, you get up out of your bed and rub your eyes while yawning. Before your leave your room to go get someone water your phone goes off. 

             From: monieKNJ

                    Hello, peachyY/N! Thank you for adding me back on here. I          couldn’t help but notice how beautiful you are and how well articulated your        profile bio is. I am from around your area and I was wondering if we could meet up for some coffee and maybe get something to eat? If you don’t want to I understand because we just ‘met’

Have a nice day,

KNJ

You get up quickly and run to Hoseok’s room. “Hobi, I need your help.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We’ll Always Have Tinder | A Theo Raeken AU

A/N: WOW SOOOOOOOOO! I got THIS request and I honestly love it, it’s hella cheese & corn & I love you anon for requesting this.

Warning: Some language, me attempting to be funny, nothing really.

Word Count: 1,552

Ding!

You eyed your phone curiously, already getting used to the tone associated with the terrible app called Tinder. You had downloaded it for laughs,but you knew exactly what the app was. A hookup app. And you had no intention of hooking up with anyone. You had just gotten out of a messy relationship a few weeks prior so dating someone -- hell even meeting up with someone was out of the question. So you’d decided while yes you wanted to have some fun, you were definitely not leaving your house to do it.

Then you saw this video of some girl trolling guys on Tinder and you knew exactly how to occupy your time. As soon as you set up your account you sat there for hours at a time, looking at everyone’s profile, some cute guys, some not so cute guys. Your camera roll was filled with the screenshots of the hilarious convos you’d sent to your friends. 

You were having fun for the first time in a long time. This was just a game to you, there was no pressure, no awkward silences in front of people you didn’t know. No potential heartbreaks. Just cocky guys who thought they ruled the world. 

Jeremy, (age) 10 miles away

Info

6′3″

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ - “A perfect gentleman.” - Anonymous Tinder woman

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ - “Made 50 Shades of Grey seem as a tame as the teletubbies.” - Anonymous Tinder woman

⭐ - “Stop asking me to review you weirdo.” - Anonymous Tinder woman

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐  - “So sweet.” - Jeremy’s mom

The bio alone made you swipe right, a soft snort escaping your nose as you did so. You looked through his pictures and he wasn’t a head turner, but he clearly had a sense of humor, something you saw as a plus for a person. Not that you were looking, but if you were going to spend all of your time on this app, you’d at least spend it with people who would keep the laughs coming.

You were on your couch, a forgotten movie playing in the background as you mindlessly swiped left and right on some new profiles, not even bothering to look at their bios anymore. You were getting bored of it. It had only been a couple days but your terrible pick up lines to the guys you’ve matched with and their sad excuse of holding a conversation just weren’t amusing you like it did in the beginning.

And then you stopped on one profile. You didn’t know why you stopped. His pictures were of low quality, a tell-tale sign that he was probably a catfish. His bio only had a few sentences. Nothing catchy, nothing extravagant. Just a normal guy.

Before you changed your mind you swiped right, your screen lighting up to tell you you’d matched. 

You went to your messages, seeing his name at the top.

Theo. 

You quickly typed a corny pickup line, not really caring that you’d used it a million times already.

“If you were a cat, I’d spend all nine lives with you.”

You sent it and placed your phone down, trying to get back into whatever movie you were watching. 

Ding!

Your eyes fell on your phone again. There was no way he answered so quickly. It must’ve been another guy with some dumb reply. 

“And how exactly do I die each time?”

You blinked at your phone screen, unable to believe or even process what he had said. Not only was it uncommon but no one had tried to make a conversation out of it. 

None until now.

You completely spaced for a moment, not prepared for this situation at all. You had just guessed the guys on here would write you off as a troll and completely ignore your antics. And yet, here was the one who didn’t.

Opening your phone, the keyboard waiting for your reply. 

“Well, basically we crash someone’s wedding and we’re in the middle of a conga line, floors wet because someone spilled alcohol and you fall and crack your head open. There’s the first.”

“Wow. For some reason I always knew a death of mine would be alcohol related. I just never imagined it like that though.”

“These are tough times, Theo. Tough times. You decide your next death.”

You saw the gray dots as he typed his next message, for some reason you were anxious to see what he’d say. 

“Nickelodeon brought back the TV show figure it out and we get our first taste of the green slime. After that I become addicted to slime and overdose within the next two weeks. You tried to stop it from happening. But I’m stubborn as hell. I die. Next life.”

You hadn’t realized it then, but that was the exact moment that Theo stole your heart. 

You sent a bunch of crying emojis as you laughed, typing up your next reply.

“FIGURE IT OUT OMG. That brings us to death number 3. The villagers from the legends of hidden temple kidnapped you and never released you. Your bones are on display at Universal Studios.”

“Wow I can’t believe those sick bastards would keep the skeleton of a cat.”

You keep messaging back and forth, the outside world was irrelevant for one tiny moment. You talk about mindless things, like Pokemon Go and what you both do for a living. You debated on whether McDonalds or Wendys was better. Obviously the golden arches won because you were quote unquote all about those 20 piece nuggets. 

“Alright, alright. How about this. If my Pokedex is lower than yours then you let me take you out sometime. And by that I mean McDonald’s drive thru and if you are extra cute maybe I’ll drive to Wendy’s too.”

“You’re an idiot. But tell me. What’s your Pokedex look like?”

“It’s not that much, my phone broke and I didn’t get a new one for the two weeks during the hype. I’ve only caught 69. And no I didn’t type 69 to be a weird creepy douchefuck.”

“First off, what the hell is a douchefuck? Second yours is definitely lower than mine.”

“So.....McDonald’s or Wendy’s?”

“Do you take all the girls to either Wendy’s or McDonald’s? Just curious.”

“Only the special ones like you bae. Cause you deserve it.”

“Lmao. You’re an idiot. Well what are you doing now?”

“I’m actually at work right now. In my hiding spot. In the bathroom.”

“In the bathroom???”

You couldn’t help but laugh out loud to that, trying to picture it in your head.

“Yeah so I’m in the stall and the person next to me has a bad case of constipation and was definitely weirded out by me laughing. Pretty sure he thought I was laughing at him but it was just the thought of death #8. I wanted to explain it to him to cheer him up but I don’t think talking to a coworker about how I’m dying 9 times with a girl I just met would go over well.”

“We’re close to the end of the list.”

“I know. This is sad. Do we just stop messaging each other after death #9?”

“We could and then constantly come back to this convo and sigh while thinking, well, we’ll always have Tinder.”

He sent a heart over, making you smile a little.

“JK we’re making another list, pshh.”

“I might retire from Tinder after this convo just so it always stays on top.”

You rolled your eyes at his charm, a thought crossing your mind. 

“How long have you been on the app?”

You were curious to know the answer not that it mattered.

“A while. But this is the best conversation I’ve ever had on here. It’s your turn.”

You were satisfied with his answer, knowing that his time on there didn’t matter, not really. 

“Okay. Death #9. We’re watching Family Guy and it’s the episode where Peter is on the roof in a shopping cart and Lois comes out yelling and he’s like get back in the house Lois we’re being Jackass and he looks into the camera and he’s like I’m Peter Griffin and this is shopping cart roof...roof shopping cart. And then he falls off the roof and his neck is all distorted. So we placed a bet that you could do it and not get hurt. You bet you wouldn’t. I bet you would. Obviously I won but I couldn’t collect my winnings because you landed funny and broke your neck just like Peter did.”

All he sent back to you was the ring emoji. Making you laugh even more.

“Just say yes.”

“You haven’t even properly asked me out on a date. You can’t just throw a ring emoji to any girl.”

“What? I thought we had a date planned. 20 piece did that mean nothing to you?!”

You just sent back a bunch of laughing emojis, shaking your head.

“I think we’re moving too slow. I’m sorry it’s just not working out.”

“Oh silly me and here I was planning our whole life together. My bad.”

“We’ll always have Tinder.”

“We’ll always have Tinder. Also sidebar. Really? Only 69 Pokemon caught? Wow you’re terrible.”

You smiled to yourself, not exactly sure what was going to come out of this but pushed those thoughts away quickly, looking at the gray dots as Theo typed. 

GD: “Don’t try me.”

Words: 1,9k

Short summary: 

You were at a fashion show with your boyfriend- Gdragon.It was great until you met your ex....

A/N:

Hello~

How have you been, my readers? I hope you’re doing okay~ 

As some of you might noticed I use the name Wang Chi Ang from the drama Moorim School, but it’s just the name that I took. Well a bit of character and his looks I borrowed too. 

Tell me if you liked it~~

You were carrying your suitcase downstairs, struggling not to let it go. Jiyong came inside and helped you. He picked up the case and took it to the taxi. In your high boots and a black tight dress, you came outside, remembering you forgot your jacket. Your black leather jacket was laying on the couch on the first floor. When you come back the taxi driver humped and surprised you.

You sat in and carefully looked at the driver. You were very picky with who drives you because you were in a car accident once and it made your life turn around. It was lucky, you met Jiyong in the next days. It was really lucky. Because you were driving in a car with her sister he came to look at her because he was worried, but instead, he found you in a coma. He felt really sorry because you were in an accident because of his sister, so he treated you a dinner when you got better and ever since then you became closer. You became so close, he asked you out on a date. Now you are dating. The car started and moved. You grabbed his waist and tried to calm down. He was the only one who knew how scared you were driving in a car. He helped you a lot to get over that fear and it was much better now. He is caring boyfriend and you are very grateful about that. While the drive took only about 30 minutes, you couldn't wait to arrive at the airport and fly to France. You were both (including you-YEY!) invited to Chanel's summer/spring Fashion Show in Paris. You've never been to France and you didn't know how to speak French either. You downloaded an app on your tablet and learned some basics of French. "Bonjour. Comment allez-vous?" "Je vais bien, merci." he answered. You didn't know he knows French as well but when you looked at his phone you found the same app you were using at the moment. "You cheater..." you gave him a glance and he smiled. You liked fashion a lot. You actually own your own brand in South Korea and it is very successful. You loved Victoria secret's fashion shows the most. You arrived at the airport at 9 p.m  and went to the hotel by taxi. The hotel was in the middle of the city and it had a nice view. It had 5 stars which meant it was a really good hotel. When you entered the hotel, everything was in white. It was all from marble. You found it very attractive. This kind of rock is really beautiful and it looks the best. He came after you and took your hand. His fingers were intertwined with yours. His hand was warm since you were cold and freezing. It was odd because it is spring but the temperature was really low. He reserved a special VIP room just for you. You couldn't wait to see it. You felt weird saying VIP because every time you thought of his fans who are probably angry because you are dating him. You haven't had the chance to see replies about your relationship, from the fans, and at this point, you didn't want to ruin the weekend. This weekend is gonna be lit. It's gonna be awesome. Nothing will ruin it. The hotel receptionist opened big white doors and you saw the living room and bedroom. It was beautiful. White leather couch and black armchairs. You could see paintings on the wall and a king sized white-black bed. You loved this kind of rooms-urbanized look. The Fashion show will start at 6 p.m. and it was only 1 p.m. so it was lunch time. Because you felt tired from the flight you decided to rest for a bit. You were woken up by the sound of someone coming in the apartment. It was your stylist. She came exactly 2 hours before the Fashion show. She did your hair and put on makeup. Jiyong came an hour before the fashion show and quickly got dressed. Before you left the apartment you locked the door and took the elevator. In front of the hotel there were many fans waiting for Jiyong, so your car was waiting in the parking garage. You sat in the black car and put your seat belt on. Ever since that crash you always put your seat belt on and make sure the person who's driving with you is buckled up too. Jiyong knew you were very sensitive about that and he got used to it and did it automatically. As the driver rode through the Paris streets, you saw Starbucks  McDonalds and some other building you also have in Korea. You arrived at a large building with an interesting design. You could see the ionic columns and many ornaments which looked gorgeous. The car stopped and there were many paparazzi and other people waiting behind the fence. There was a red carpet on the ground and you felt very important at the moment. You took a moment to go deep in your thought and calm yourself down when someone opened the door and Jiyong asked you if you're ready. You nodded and stepped out of the car and waved your hair back. Jiyong offered you a hand and you took it. You comfortably walked in the building and he was holding your hand like a real gentleman. You looked right in front of you and stopped. You were deciding whether you should turn around and run or just call security to take you back to the hotel. In that desperate moment, your face expression was really bad and your eyes teared up. It was only one person who could make you cry that easily. His name is Wang Chi Ang  Your ex-boyfriend. You hated the time when he was your boyfriend  He thought money can buy everything. You were in high school back then and his father is the CEO of one of the most influenced companies in Korea and China. Wang Chi Ang was madly in love with you and at some point, you fell for his charms too. He was a great boyfriend for a while. But when he introduced you to his father everything went down. His father wanted to make Chi Ang ready to be the next CEO of the company and a girlfriend was an obstacle. He did everything to make Chi Ang different and harsh. At one point he was violent to you too. It was horrible. Your break up was after a year of great dates and wonderful moments you spent together. You had enough and left him, for your own good. After so many throwbacks in your brain you almost collapsed on the ground but luckily Jiyong caught you. He looked really worried. "Are you okay? What happened?" "I-I-I'm fine. Everything... is...umm- okay." It happened. The thing you feared the most. He was walking towards you. "Annyeong Y/N~~ I didn't know you'll be here..." he said with a cheerful voice you used to back then. Jiyong looked really surprised and didn't know what's happening. "And who exactly are you?" "Oooh... You didn't mention me to him... I'm disappointed... I thought we are friends, Y/N~" he continued. You could see the teasing look in his eyes, you knew he was trying to make Jiyong angry, so he'll lose the good reputation since Chi Ang was more known here than GD was. "We're not friends. Let's just go Jiyongie...Leave him, he's too petty to even speak to him." you tried to give him a sign to stop, but clearly he didn't get it, even though you saw the spark in his eyes, saying he won't go easy tonight. "Ya! Don't talk to my girlfriend again. That's a warning." "And what are you gonna do if I don't care about that warning?" You had enough and just took GD's hand and went to take a seat. You got seats in the front row, with the best view and as a great sign of how good today is gonna be right on the other side of your seats, there was Wang Chi Ang. You felt the tension int the air and you didn't want to look in Chi Ang's eyes. "Who is he? What did he do? Tell me everything." Jiyong has never made a big deal if a man approached you, but now, when he saw how you look at him, he was really worried and angry a bit. "He's my ex when I was in high school. His father is the CEO of the *company name*... I broke up with him... because... um... we can talk about that at home, okay? Just don't do anything he is just an idiot..." During the fashion show you admired the dresses and together you commented them and he was really happy, you agreed with his opinion in some dresses. The whole Fashion show he made sure you were holding his hand. He seemed to death worried. After the show, there was a V.I.P dinner for some special people and among them were you both. You drove to the restaurant in a limo with another couple, from the USA. You had to sit in a table you were assigned to. That just happened to be the same table as Wang Chi Ang's. That meant bad news. For both of you. You didn't have the nerves left to watch him and Jiyong was tense every time he saw him. "Just don't make a fuss, act normal, okay?" you whispered. Luckily there were 4 more people at the table so you thought everything will be alright. Dinner started with a special guest's speech. Jiyong kept his hand on your knees and you thought it was adorable. He was worrying for nothing. You had no other feelings towards Chi Ang than anger and hatred. You couldn't even think straight knowing what would happen if he started talking and said something that wasn't appropriate  Next to you was sitting Ariana Grande's designer and you really matched well. The whole dinner you mostly spoke with her and her husband who was also a designer. "I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll come back soon," you told Jiyong and went to the bathroom. You had to make an effort to find it. You went to the bathroom and fixed your makeup a bit. Someone entered the bathroom. You thought it was just another woman, but it wasn't. It was Wang Chi Ang. "What do you think, you are doing?" you turned towards him and stood confidently. "Aigo... You think I'll just let you go with an idol? And him? G-Dragon. You must be kidding. It's only for publicity, right?" "You should keep your mouth shut. I see you haven't changed a bit. You're still the same idiot as you were." The door opened again and it was not a woman. Again. It was a man. "So, you can go with me peacefully or... Well just go with me Y/N." You were always scared of that side of him. He looked and acted cute and innocent but he was really scary. You got scared when a man grabbed you and tried to pull you out of the room. Luckily Jiyong knew something was wrong and came just in time. He pushed the man off of you and punched Wang Chi Ang, but right behind him, there was a man taking a picture of what he just did. You went outside. He had a scratch on his head and you were shaking in front of the car.

H U S K Y

“You need to stop moping and get the fuck back out there, girl!” I heard Tiffany yell from the bedroom. I flushed the toilet and didn’t bother to wash my hands.

“I don’t know, Tiff, it’s only been three weeks.” Three weeks ago my boyfriend, Josh, dumped me. I wasn’t expecting it at all. Apparently he linked up with an old high school fling of his and realized the spark was still there so out goes me and in comes Becca. We weren’t dating that long. Only a year or so but I was still heart broken and Tiffany wanted me to get back in the dating scene? No chance.

“Three weeks is plenty of healing time. They say you need one day for each week you dated someone to heal from it. Let’s see, you dated for what, a year?” I nodded. “So, fifty two weeks…” Tiffany started doing the mental math.

“Based on that, I still need roughly four and a half more weeks of moping.” I flopped down on my bed.

“Forget what I said! You need to get out of your house, at least. It’s looking a little…unruly lately.” She looked around the room and made a stank face.

“Fine, let’s go out.” Tiffany squealed with delight. “On Friday.” She stopped her celebration.

“Friday? But it’s only Monday!” She complained.

“Don’t push it. Friday or nothing.” I threatened.

Friday came a lot sooner than I had thought it would. When I logged off my computer at the end of the day and left work I was dreading going out. I tried to think of the different ways I could bail without Tiffany absolutely hating me for it. Almost as if she knew I was thinking of bailing, Tiffany called me.

“Friday!” She screamed at me. I couldn’t help but laugh. Tiffany was my best friend and she always knew what I needed most. “I’ll be at your house in an hour and then we’ll go to dinner and get drinks and then we’re going dancing tonight!” The excitement in her voice made me forget all about bailing. I was actually kind of excited now too.

True to her word, Tiffany knocked on my door an hour later. She dragged me out of the doorway as soon as I opened it, as if she was afraid if I didn’t leave right then that I would get sucked back up into bed which was probably true. I hopped in the passenger side of her car and we were off to downtown. There was this Mexican place we both really loved. It was our go to for whenever we went out to dinner. We ordered a pitcher of margaritas to share and when I was feeling nice and loose, Tiffany started lecturing again.

“I’m just saying, Brit, I think you need to get back out there. There’s no point in moping around. Josh sucks, he’s an ass and you deserve better!” The tequila had wormed its way inside my brain and what she said started to make sense.

“Maybe…maybe you’re right.” I admitted. Her eyes grew wide and eyebrows shot up to her hair line.

“I’m right?” She asked, dumbfounded.

“You’re right.” I had decided. And she was right. Josh wasn’t worth the moping I had been doing. I spent too much time and energy on missing someone who couldn’t even be bothered to dump me in person? Fuck that. “So how should I get back out there?”

“I’m glad you asked!” She said pulling out her phone. “You know those dating apps that are specifically targeted at a certain group? Plenty of Fish for the Jesus freaks, Farmers Only for farmers and Sizzl is for people who love bacon?”

“Wait is that last one real?” I asked.

“Very. Anyway, there’s an app I just started using called HSKY. It’s basically lumberjack looking dudes who are all very hot.” She turned her phone to me to let me look. The guy on the screen was really hot. He was, well, husky just as the app described.

“I could be into this.” I told her.

“I knew you would be.” She winked at me as our food arrived and we chowed down.

The rest of the night was just as I expected, we got wasted. We ended up having to leave Tiff’s car in town and Uber back to mine since I lived closer and she crashed at my house. The next morning we were both hungover and decided to order some food for breakfast and just chill and watch a movie. While we did all this, I had downloaded the HSKY app and I was happily swiping away.

“Why are you smiling at your phone and not paying attention? This is when the unsuspecting girl gets murdered! It’s the best part!” Tiffany asked me during the movie.

“Sorry, I’m talking to a guy on HSKY.” I explained. Tiffany grabbed the remote and paused the movie. I looked up at the screen and the unsuspecting girl as Tiffany called her was tied up to a bed, blood soaked her clothes and sheets.

“What’s his name?” Tiffany got up from her couch and sat down next to me on my couch.

“His name is Ryan.” I showed her his profile.

“He’s so cute!” Tiffany said. She swiped through his pictures and read his bio. “’I’m an outdoorsy guy and family means everything to me.’ Hm he sounds kinda boring but whatevs he’ll do!” She handed me the phone back.

“He’s really sweet so far.” I felt defensive.

“When are you guys gonna hang out?” Tiffany asked.

“We’re talking about grabbing a drink tonight, actually.” I told her slightly embarrassed.

“Tonight!?” Tiffany was surprised. “You move fast, girl! Hell yeah!” She cheered me on. “Get that fuckin dick! Get that husky dick!” She got up and mimicked slapping someone’s ass.

“Tiff, oh my God.” I laughed at her.

“Let’s finish the movie and then pick out an outfit for your date tonight.” She pressed play and we did as she said. When the movie was over we went upstairs to my room.

Tiffany stood in my closet and looked at my clothes. “So you’re definitely going out with him tonight?”

“Yes. We just confirmed we’re going to meet at Red Spot at eight.” I checked my phone to see if he had said anything else but I had no new messages.

“Red Spot, huh? Fancy!” Tiffany was impressed. “So we need something nice but not too nice. Hm…” She pulled out a black dress I hadn’t worn in years. “This could work.” She held it out to me.

“I forgot I had that in there.” I grabbed the dress from her and slipped it off the hanger and onto my body.

“Yup, that’s the one.” She declared. “You’ll get dick tonight for sure.”

“Tiff! It’s not about getting dick. I’m going to get drinks, not dick.” I told her.

“That’s what they all say.” She said. “I’m gonna get out of your hair and you should probably wash yours before your date. Have fun tonight and don’t get murdered!” Tiffany gave me a hug and left. I still had three hours before I was meeting Ryan so I decided to take Tiff’s advice and got in the shower. I took my time, making sure to shave everything. Even though I said I wasn’t going to get dick tonight, Tiff was right, that’s what they all say. It was better to be shaved than sorry.

The time finally came to leave to get to Red Spot at eight. I got an Uber there just to be safe since I didn’t want a repeat of last night and have to leave a car in town overnight. When my Uber driver pulled up to the front of the building my heart started racing. I hadn’t realized how nervous I was. My palms were hot and sweaty and I could feel my cheeks growing red. I took two deep breaths and got out of the car. I walked into Red Spot and standing by the hostess stand was Ryan. He looked exactly like his pictures which I silently thanked God for. He turned around as I walked in the door and smiled at me.

“Brittney?” He asked. He held out his hand to shake.

“Hi.” I accepted his hand despite my sweaty palms and shook his hand with as much false confidence I could muster. The hostess brought us to our table and Ryan pulled out my chair for me. My heart fluttered at the act. After we ordered drinks, Ryan broke the uncomfortable silence.

“So, what kind of work do you do?” It was a mundane question but it got us off on the right foot because we didn’t stop talking the whole night. When Red Spot was closing up we started to get some nasty looks from the servers indicating to us that we were no longer welcome and should probably get going now.

“Looks like the servers want us to leave.” I told Ryan.

“Oh wow, yeah. Are they giving us death glares?” He asked under his breath.

“They are for sure giving us death glares.” I laughed. We got up from our table and walked out of the restaurant. When we were out on the street and looked at each other, neither seemed to know what the next move should be. The spark between us was real and the alcohol had me feeling kind of horny.

“So, should we go somewhere a little less…private?” I asked him. I didn’t know what came over me. I was usually never that direct with someone. His eyes widened at my suggestion and then a smirk came over his face and his eyes relaxed.

“I think we definitely should.” He grabbed my hand and we started walking. He told me his apartment was nearby and if I didn’t mind we could go there. Not a single part of me minded. It felt like an hour walk because every nerve ending on my body was firing at full at the thought of Ryan naked but it only ended up being a ten minute walk.

We sat down in his living room and he asked me if I wanted a drink. I figured we already got this far, what’s one more? He went into the kitchen and came back with two identical looking glasses. I took a sip of mine and asked him what it was.

“Oh, just a specialty drink of mine. I created it myself.” He smiled at me. I drank another sip and the all the booze from tonight and last night hit me. I felt dizzy and nauseous.

“I don’t feel too great. Maybe I shouldn’t drink anymore.” I admitted. My head felt like it was in the clouds. I couldn’t focus on anything for too long.

“Are you okay?” Ryan asked me. “You should lie down.” He took my feet and swung them up on the couch so I was horizontal. The last thing I saw was Ryan looking down at me with a smile on his face that made my blood run cold.

When I woke up my eyes were blurred. I blinked a couple times trying to focus my sight. I saw a room that was unfamiliar to me and remembered I went home with Ryan the night before. I couldn’t remember much after we got back here, just drinking a couple sips of whatever Ryan had made and then getting really dizzy. I played back what happened in my head trying to make sense of it. My eyes finally cleared and I could see where I was better now.  I felt a pressure on my wrists and realized both my wrists were tied to the bed posts. I yanked on them to see if they’d budge but they remained tied. Panic started to seep into my body. What was happening? Why was I tied to this bed? Where was Ryan?

At the last thought Ryan walked into the bedroom. He was fully naked and his penis was erect. He smiled at me and played with something behind his back.

“Ryan?” I asked. “What’s going on?”

“You know you shouldn’t be so trusting on a first date.” He told me. He walked closer to the bed and pulled whatever was in his hands out from behind his back. The kitchen knife gleamed in the early morning sun and blinded me for a second. I felt the knife go into my stomach and when Ryan pulled it back out, warmth spread out around me.

        10.7.2019

Colleen Burke

chapter one

▪•●○° Don't judge a book by its movie - J.W. Eagan ▪•●○° Maybe I should start wearing makeup? No, that could potentially ruin my face. Plus, my siblings would stare at me awkwardly and tease me. No. Definitely not. New wardrobe? No, we don't have the money for that. Makeover? Megs is always willing to do that for me, I'll ask her. No, but I she had something to do with the cheerleading squad today. I officially give up. All of this thinking was going on as Iceeh was looking in the mirror, brush her hair for what would be the third time today. Sundays weren't always the best for Iceeh, especiallIy if the first day of school was the next day. It was set, Iceeh Reese wouldn't have her new look for her Junior year. She was officially a lost cause. She had to give up on trying to get her first kiss from Brett King. She was officially done not only with Brett, but with every boy in current existence. Desperate times like this called for contacting your best friend. This time, it was Megan. Megan answered after two rings, she sounded very excited, which wasn't a regular mood on her currently. "Oh my, you will not believe what just happened!" Probably went shopping, Iceeh thought, but she was wrong. Very wrong. "What is it, Megs? Excited over something you bought?" "No! It's something much better!" Megan basically screamed, "Finally broke up with that Samuel kid? Thank god!" Megan became silent for a moment, "Well, forgot to do that. Thanks for reminding me! But no, I got asked on a date. You will not guess by who..." "Um-" A sudden burst of cheers and cries were heard, "I knew you wouldn't guess! It was Brett. Brett King! Aren't you happy for me? I might get a boyfriend who doesn't suck and doesn't want to fuck himself because he's so selfish!" Iceeh's eyes bulged and she gulped. It had happened, again! The fifth friend she had been betrayed by. "I have to go, I'm sorry but I don't want to be late. Sorry! Bye!" "But-" Iceeh hung up and walk over to her bed, throwing herself face first onto it. Her eyes started filling with tears as she remembered every single time this had happened to her. She would find a friend for herself, spill most of her secrets. Then, right when they were about to form an actual bond, Brett King would peek into the picture and pull her friends away. But did he ever talk to her? No. He just took her friends away without looking back at her. A sense of diaapointment and betrayal took over her as sat back up on her bed and deposited her cell phone on the nightstand beside her. Instead of resorting to her tears and a tub of chocolate ice cream while binge watching Gabbie Hanna on YouTube, she decided to do something with her life. Iceeh got up from her bed and walked calmly down the stairs where the living room was occupied by her two brothers lying on the couch, watching something on the television. As soon as they saw her about to open the door, they both spoke up, "Where are you going?" "Out," was Iceeh's simply answer. "Come back by eight, mom is getting out of work early today. Have an amazing rest of your day." Iceeh only heard the word 'day' and immediately sprinted out the door, not before closing it, of course. She didn't know where to go, anywhere would be totally fine with anywhere but her house. › › › No. Not that bench. That's the bench you sat on with Megan the first day. Not that one, either. That was yours and Betty's favorite bench ever. Ah, this one, let's just hope I don't get a new friend. You see, most of Iceeh's friends had been ones she'd met at the park. Tears started brimming her eyes as she remembered all of her old friends, all of whom she had told who her crush was. All of whom decided that even if Iceeh liked Brett, they could still date him, like Megan had done. A tear escaped her eye and rolled down her cheek as she wiped it away. "Do you mind?" Really? Another one? Wait, that's a male voice, maybe this could finally work out! "Excuse me?" Iceeh wiped her tears away and turned around to the person. "Hello. I noticed that you were crying, so I thought maybe I could help?" Iceeh motioned for the boy to sit next to her, "Excuse me if this question is impertinent but, are you gay, bisexual, or... I mean, I don't have anything against the LBGT+ community. I'm just, that's my personality, I guess... Actually, I am just starting to hate having girls as friends." Iceeh shrugged. The boy gave her a weird stare before answering, "No. Anyway, I'm Parker." Iceeh couldn't help but giggle as she shook hands with Parker. "How curious, I met a Parker at the park." Parker chuckled along with her, he was starting to like her personality a little. "So, you waiting for anyone in particular?" She shrugged, "If a miracle counts... I'm Iceeh by the way." The corners of his pinkish chapped lips tugged upwards in a smile which made him feel instantely a million times happier than he had been two seconds ago. "Is there any chance you've already found it?" Iceeh took her eyes off her sneakers and looked to Parker. Their eyes seemed to attract instantely as chocolate brown met sea blue. Iceeh couldn't help her smile as she searched his eyes. "Do you believe so?" "Well, I'm here so, yes. I do believe you have found your miracle." Parker states, taking her hand in his, "That's by far the cheesiest pick up line I've heard in my life. Is there another one where that one came from?" A light shade of crimson rose to meet Parker's cheeks as he looked down, thinking for a moment. "Knock, knock." Iceeh furrowed her eyebrows before following along with the strange boy. "Who's there?" "Am I?" "Am I?" "Am I in heaven or have angels suddenly fallen from the sky?" Iceeh rolled her eyes, "That one wasn't even good!" "So, do you have a Snapchat or something?" Iceeh suddenly chuckled as if it was the silliest joke she's ever heard in her life. "Snapchat? I hate Snapchat. Who in their right mind uses it, anyway. Only popular superficial people like those times of things. But I mean, I have a Facebook page that I haven't used in years?" ----------------------------------------------------------- Parker: Are you home yet, or did my princess run into any trouble on the streets which impeded her to make it home safely? Iceeh: I'm perfectly fine thanks for asking, though Parker: In all reality, I just wanted to talk to you Iceeh: I have homework to do right now. Talk to you at school? Parker: Okay, I guess I'll talk to you tomorrow. If you need help, just ask Iceeh: Will do. Thanks. ----------------------------------------------------------- › › › The blaring of Parker's alarm clock made him groan as he flipped his body and reached his hand out from under his covers, shutting off the sound protruding from the device. He reached for his cell phone. November 30th? How time passes. He thought, as he opened the Facebook Messenger app and sent a good morning message to his newest 'friend', Iceeh. A knock came to his door as his twin brother yelled into the room, "Bro. Get up before you fall asleep again." "I'm up Brett, I'll be ready in a few." Parker stood from his bed and made a bee line to his closet where he took out a plaid shirt, boxers, and some jeans. A ding was heard from his cell phone which he simply waved off, "Probably just that Iceeh girl from yesterday. I thought she would take more time to answer. I guess not." "Who are you talking about?" Brett asked his twin as he walked into his room, a light blue towel wrapped around his waist, a few drops of water still running down his chest from his shower. "No one. Just a girl I met at the park yesterday," Parker shrugged as if it was nothing as he collected his tooth brush, cell phone, and clean clothes. "Another one? Parker, is there any chance that, for once, you will try to make this a long-lasting, serious relationship?" "Definitely not. I mean, she's hot and everything, but nah. Just another girl. The serious relationship won't come for a while. Can you believe it, though? She doesn't even have a Snapchat! I had to download the Facebook Messenger app again to message her." Brett rolled his eyes at his younger twin and stalked out of the room. Walking into his own room, Brett got dressed and then proceeded to the kitchen where his mother was seated, ordering the maids around. "Good morning, mother." He greeted almost silently, in fret that his mother would lash out at him for interuppting her morning routine. "You, young lady. Why are my son's breakfast not ready? And you, have you seen James?" "No, ma'am. Mr. King didn't come home last night again, actually." Brett's mother sighed distastefully, before noticing Brett's calm figure before her. "Good morning, Brett." Brett repeated himself, "Good morning, mother. How many times has dad not come home from work?" "What happened to Brett's breakfest, huh? And here comes Parker, too. Is there any way you women could hurry up?" Parker join the room and took his spot on the table, giving his twin an awkward look. "What do you mean dad hasn't come home?" One of the maids walked into the dining room, carrying a tray with two plates. She set them down in front of their owners before leaving the trio alone. Brett finally decided to sit in his spot at the table as he took a sip of orange juice. "You heard her bro, dad has been late coming home several times now. Isn't that right mom?" Their mother nodded, "Yes, yes he has. I'm not going to try to hide it from both of you, at least not anymore. Your father has been coming very late from work for the past month. Sometimes he won't show up until one or two days later." Realization dawned on Brett as he came to the conclusion that his father was hiding a secret from them. "What have his excuses been?" His mother shrugged, "Same as always, he supposedly had to stay the night in his office because he had too much work. Nothing new." Parker shrugged, "I don't see what's so frustrating or bad about that. Dad is just working as much as he can so that we never have any money problems." Brett sighed at his brother's ignorance and excused himself from the table and the current conversation › › ›