#Regulus:🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

resident-gay-bitch · 2 months

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Regulus’ heart breaks as he stands there, just behind the willow tree, watching James and Sirius roll around on the grass, play fighting in their own little world.

Of course he left him. Of course James would pick Sirius over Regulus, wouldn’t everyone? Regulus has never been picked first. Not once.

Not by his parents, who ignored him throughout his entire childhood to focus on framing Sirius as the perfect son and heir.

Not by Sirius, who ran away, picking James to be his brother and not bothering to ask Regulus to tag along.

Not in team games, where students would pick through the class one by one, and Regulus would be one of the last few standing.

Not by his friends, who all would chose their partners, or the other people in the group first. He joined last, it’s only fair.

Not even by the lizard who inhabits his dorm room, who picks the three other boys to crawl over to first, every time.

And certainly not by James.

He thought, for once, the cycle might be broken. He thought, for once, someone would pick him first. He’d get chosen over someone else, just once.

He should have known better.

He should have known that the moment Sirius found out about he and James sneaking around in dark corridors and whispering sweet words to each other, James would have to pick.

He was foolish to think James would pick him over Sirius. He was foolish to think that James would pick him over anyone.

And as Lily, with her fiery red hair pulled back into braids, comes marching over to the boys, snatching James up by his collar and earning herself a cheek kiss, Regulus realises he should have seen that coming too.

Not even two weeks has passed since Regulus placed second to his brother, as he does in fucking everything, and James has already moved on.

Regulus would never be anyone’s first choice, he should have known better.

He knows better now.

It’s not until three months later that Regulus finally shatters from it. The crushing weight of never being enough, never being someone’s first choice.

It’s Slytherin against Ravenclaw for the quidditch cup, and there in the crowd, he spots his brother and James.

They’re decked out in silver and blue, and they don’t look at Regulus, not even once.

Barty finds him in the showers, once the entire teams cleared out. He’s dressed in a confusing mix of blue and green, for his own house and his friends.

Hes crying. Regulus doesn’t think he’s ever cried this hard before. The water is pouring down over his head, and he’s still fully dressed in his uniform.

Slytherin lost. He lost them the match, because he was more focused on trying to catch James or Sirius looking his way just once than getting the snitch. They didn’t, and he lost.

Barty clearly doesn’t know how to handle this. The lowest he’s ever seen Regulus would have been prior to an exam he stressed himself out about. Besides, Barty has always been a little awkward when handling emotions.

Regulus tries to tell him to leave him be, he really does. But his words get all chocked up in his throat and he can’t get out much more than a wail or a sob. It fucking hurts.

“What’s the matter, Black?” Barty asks, switching the water off before crouching down in front of him, “What’s got your knickers in a twist, hey?”

“I-I’ll never be… good enough.” Regulus confesses. He’s never said it out loud before. He’s not a vulnerable person, he doesn’t do this. He knows better than to let out his sob story to someone, they can hold it over him one day. But he can’t help himself, he finds. He needs to get it off his chest before it rips him open, “I’ll never… b-be enough.”

Barty’s silent for a while, clearly unsure of what to say. It only makes Regulus sob more. He pulls his knees up to his chest and hides his head in his hand, and he fucking cries. He’s sure if anyone’s still out side, they’d hear it, but Barty locked the door when he came in. At least that’s something.

“I can never be enough.” Regulus sobs again, and this time Barty kicks into action.

He’s still awkward about it, Regulus can tell, he probably has better things to do than listen to Regulus cry as well, which only makes this worse. He pushes Regulus’ sopping hair out of his face and pats his face dry with the end of his Slytherin scarf before hauling them both to their feet.

“Who told ya that?” Barty asks, pulling his wand out to try his hand at a drying spell. It mostly works, so Regulus can’t complain.

“I don’t have to be told something to know it, Barty.” Regulus sniffles, wiping his eyes. They sting, and he knows he looks terrible, but there’s no use in worrying about that now.

“Well… I think, if you haven’t been told, it can’t be true.” Barty shrugs, tucking his wand back in his pocket.

“Fine.” Regulus nods, “My entire fucking family has told me then, on several occasions.”

“Oh.” Barty stills, and he has a look on his face of utter confusion.

Regulus shakes his head and goes to walk for the door, but he winces when he puts pressure on his ankle. He fell on it weirdly, midway through the match when he was knocked off his broom. It didn’t bother him before, but it does now.

“You hurt?” Barty asks, and Regulus nods.

Silently, Barty reaches out and wraps his arm around Regulus’ waist. He flinches at first, startled by the slightly intimate touch, but then Barty pulls Regulus to shift his weight, and he relaxes into it a little. Together, they walk back across the field, Barty carrying Regulus’ broom, and half of Regulus’ weight, and make their way back to the castle.

It’s oddly silent.

It’s always quiet, between them. Regulus isn’t much of a talker, and when Barty runs out of stupid things to say he goes quiet and people watches. He usually watches Regulus, since they’re always together, something that took a while to get used to. Barty really likes to watch Regulus read, it makes him a little self conscious of any strange expressions he might be making.

But it’s a strange sort of quiet now. It’s silent. Regulus isn’t talking, not because he doesn’t want to, but because he feels ashamed for breaking down like that. He doesn’t just break down. Men don’t fucking break down. Especially not in front of people like that. He feels embarrassed that Barty found him.

Well, he’s grateful it was Barty over anyone else, seeing as though they’re supposed to be close friends, Merlin forbid Sirius found him. But it’s still uncomfortable.

The only friend any of them have that likes to talk about feelings is Pandora. Regulus assumed this was because she was a girl, at first, however, Dorcas doesn’t like talking about them either. Pandoras just strange like that, she cares about people in odd ways. Sometimes it’s nice, but mostly it’s terrifying.

Barty looks like he wants to talk. He also looks like he wants to watch Regulus, but every time he turns his head to do so he probably sees the red rimming of Regulus’ eyes and finds something much uglier than usual. It only makes Regulus feel all the more ashamed.

Barty starts whistling. It’s not his regular noise filling whistles either, it’s his uncomfortable whistling. He doesn’t want to be here, Regulus can tell. Merlin, he needs to get away.

“Going back to your dorm?” Barty asks as they round a corridor in the castle.

Regulus nods, “Is Evan-“

“He’s there.” Barty says, “Cas too… dunno about Dora, she’s always off with the fairies. If she’s not hugging Dorcas about their loss then I dunno where she is.”

Regulus goes tense, “I don’t want them to see me.”

Barty stops and swallows, “Okay… how about my dorm then? My roommates are all down by the lake. They snagged some firewhisky.”

“Okay.” Regulus agrees, because he has no where else to go.

Once settled in Barty’s dorm, Regulus changes into more comfortable clothes. Plaid pyjama pants and a green knitted sweater he knows is his own that went “missing” last year. He doesn’t question it, Barty’s strange like that. He likes to collect things, and especially Regulus’ things.

They’re both sitting on his bed, Regulus tucked up under the covers and Barty sitting on the other end. He’s flipping through one of his dorm mates magazines and whistling to himself, his regular whistling again. It calms Regulus a bit.

Lying there, stuck with his own thoughts, he can’t hide from the images that pop into his mind every time he closes his eyes. All of Sirius and James, all of them examples where Regulus placed last.

There’s so many it’s hard to filter out which ones are new and which ones are old.

They all hurt just the same.

“Whatcha crying about now?” Barty asks, looking over at Regulus. He didn’t even realise he was crying again, but he is. “Did I do something wrong? I’ll fix it, whatever. Get ya whatever you need, promise.”

“You didn’t do anything.” Regulus sniffles, rolling onto his back to look up at the ceiling. Barty’s stuck posters up there, muggle ones of girls on motorcycles and punk bands, just to piss off his dad. “I’m just…”

“Go on.” Barty asks, sitting up now, cross legged and attentive. “There’s no one here, just me. Promise I’ll never tell.”

Regulus sighs and fiddles with his fingers, “I don’t need your pity, Barty. I’ve survived this long, I can survive some more.”

“Yeah, but you’re crying.” He says, and Regulus glares at him. “What? I ain’t seen you cry before, it’s weird. I know it’s really gotta be botherin ya if you’re crying like this. What would Dora say?”

“She’d probably try to hug me and make me cry more.” Regulus offers.

“Do you want… me to- uhm, hug you?”

“No.” Regulus glares at him. “I don’t want your pity, I said.”

“It’s not my pity, Regulus!” Barty splutters, “It’s a bloody hug. Dora says there really good for ya! I love her hugs, you know. Get ‘em all the time. I- I know I’m no Pandora but… I mean, I can offer ya a real bony one.”

Regulus snickers and looks back up at the roof, “No thanks. That’s weird.”

“Is it?” Barty asks, “Cause… cause I’ve been listening to what she’s sayin and… I think it would be nice.”

“If I hugged you right now?” Regulus raised an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah… and other times.” Barty shrugged, “I dunno, might be dumb but… we’re supposed to be friends, ya know? Friends hug. Cas hates ‘em, unless they’re from Dora, but Evan and I hug sometimes.”

“You’re being weird.”

“I’m not trying to.” Barty frowned, “I just… I care about you, I suppose.”

Regulus swallowed. The only person who’s said that before has been Pandora, but she cares about everyone.

Barty… well, he doesn’t care about much at all. He cares about so little, that Regulus thought the only thing he probably cared about was pissing off his dad and Pandora herself. But apparently that’s not true.

Regulus doesn’t want to believe it. He doesn’t want to hurt himself by believing that he could be one of the very few things Barty has come to care about.

But they’re friends, and Barty watches him a lot, and collects Regulus’ things, and helps him when he cries, and offers to hug him.

Now Regulus is crying for a whole other reason.

“One hug?” Barty offers, sticking out his arms, “I’ll make it so quick and if you hate it we don’t ever have to do it again.”

Regulus contemplates it. He doesn’t remember the last time he was hugged.

He knows the last good one was Pandora, maybe last year, when they were leaving for summer. Quick and carefree. The last bad one, that was James. Not that it was bad at the time, but it hurts to think about now. It was false stability and ended in heartbreak. The last time he was hugged to be soothed though? His mind takes him back to Sirius, when they were still little.

“Fine.” Regulus mutters, sitting up under the covers, “But make it quick.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Barty nods and moves in, “Sorry if I’m uncomfortable.”

Regulus nods and sits very still as Barty wraps himself around Regulus’ shoulders. It’s awkward, to say the least. They’ve never done this before, and they’re going about it very strangely.

“Reg… you gotta relax a bit.”

“How am I supposed to relax when I have a boney man attached to me?”

Barty scoffs and squeezes him a little tighter, “Just put your head on my shoulder, orrite. Relax, just for a second.”

Regulus huffs but does it anyway. He leans his head over to rest on Barty’ shoulder and drops his own, and… oh, it’s nice. It’s actually really, really nice. Barty’s soothing his back, and twisting his finger around the end of Regulus’ hair. And it’s nice.

He can’t even feel Barty’s ribs poking him or anything. It’s really, really cosy.

Regulus pushes him away, wiping his tears.

Barty gives him a guilty smile, “Terrible?”

“No.” Regulus sniffles, “It was actually grossly nice.”

Barty snickers and nods his head, “Well, if you ever need another hug, I’ll give ya as many as ya kneed.”

“Thanks.”

“No problems, Black.”

Regulus fiddles with the ends of his sleeve, refusing to look up at Barty, who he knows is sitting there and staring. He’s so quiet, when he stares. It’s as if any noise Barty makes would ruin his ability to set his full attention solely on Regulus.

It’s so strange. He’s so strange.

“You can’t tell anyone.” Regulus mumbles.

“What, that we hugged?” Barty laughs.

“No.” He scoffs, “What I said before, wanker. In the showers.”

“Oh.” Barty nods, “Well, I wasn’t gonna anyway. Course not, Reg. I know you. I know you hate people knowing your business.”

Regulus nods, “You really wouldn’t have told anyone? Not even Dora?”

“Cross my heart.” Barty smiles, doing just that, “I know she’s my best friend, but you are too. It means something, you know?”

“Oh.” Regulus mumbles.

Barty can only laugh at him, and Regulus turns a little pink.

“Can I… no, don’t worry about it.”

“No, go on.” Barty offers, “It’s just you and me.”

Regulus sighs, “I just… I’m tired of not being good enough, Barty.”

“I dunno what you mean, Black. You’re bloody brilliant.” Barty says, flopping down on his back like a starfish, “You shoulda been in Ravenclaw with your smarts, and not to mention your skills as a seeker. You’re top of the class, Reggie, course you’re good enough.”

Regulus thinks Barty will never understand how much that singular sentence fucking means to him, even if he tries to explain it. It stings, how good it feels to hear it. He never has. Not once.

“Not just in school, Barty. Everywhere else.” Regulus mumbles, wiping his teary eyes. They’re stinging again, and he really doesn’t want to cry, but he knows he will. It’s so stupid. “Everything else. I’m just…”

Barty rolls onto his side, propping his head up on his elbow to look at Regulus, “Like, with your family?”

Regulus nods, chewing on a hangnail.

“Yeah, I get that.” Barty sighs, “Is this about… those who must not be named?”

Regulus closes his eyes to compose himself, and nods again.

“Right.” Barty says, “Did Sirius do something? You know he barked at me the other day, like a fucking dog. So I’ll go hex him, happily, if you want?”

“No, Barty. Don’t.” Regulus shook his head, “He didn’t… I… they both just…”

“Go on.” Barty said softly, softer than Regulus has ever heard him speak before as he slowly sits up to get level with him.

“I’ll always be second best.” Regulus mutters, and then he starts crying again. Hot tears down his cheeks, redness in his eyes, stuttering over himself as he shakes.

“Oh, Reg…”

“He- he just picked James, over his own blood brother. Every time it’s James and… and I… and James just… I loved him. I loved him Barty, I was in love with him. I think part of me still is, but… he, he picked Sirius too. He picked Sirius, and Lily, because she’s just… she’s so pretty, and smart, and she’s got everything that I’ve got but, she’s just… she’s just so much better.” Regulus heaved, pressing a hand to his chest, “Everywhere, I see it everywhere. Not just with them, but mostly, I- I’ll never… I’ve never been someone’s first choice, Barty. Ever. And I don’t think I ever will be. No one picks me just because they can.”

His shoulders shake as he cries, his breath short and stuttered. When Barty reaches out in offer for another hug, Regulus falls forward into his arms, head pressed against his friends chest.

It feels so safe there, to be cradled in Barty’s arms, it’s warm. He cries a puddle through his sweater, but Barty doesn’t seem to mind.

“Shh, Reggie.” Barry sooths, lightly scratching his nails over Regulus’ back and sifting his fingers through his hair. “Just breathe, love. Just breathe.”

Regulus follows his command, taking deep breaths and timing them with the rise and fall of Barty’s chest beneath his head. He relaxes there, letting his eyes fall shut, and Barty continues to rub his back and play with his hair.

“I’m so tired.” Regulus mumbles through the last of his tears, “I’m going to fall asleep if you keep doing that.”

“That’s okay.” Barty laughs softly, “How about we lie down?”

“Isn’t that weird?” Regulus asks.

“Isn’t everything I do weird?”

Regulus shrugs and follows when Barty pulls him down to lay against the pillows. Barty slips under the covers with him, and pulls Regulus’ head against his chest again. Bartys heart is beating faster than it should be, but Regulus ignores it and wiggles around until he’s comfortable.

Once again, Barty strokes his back and scratches his scalp, and folds himself into Regulus a little.

He presses a little kiss to the top of Regulus’ head, and his heartbeat speeds up rapidly.

Regulus tenses, “Why is your heart beating like that, Barty? Are you okay? Did I make you uncomfortable?” He questions, already coming up with a million terrible reasons for it. He’s been so stupidly selfish about his own problems he didn’t even notice how uncomfortable he’s made his supposed best friend.

“No…” Barty half follows as Regulus sits up, leaning back on his elbows, “No, Reg. Obviously not.”

Regulus’ shoulders relax a little, “Well, then what is it?”

Barty looks away, “Come on, don’t tease, Reggie. I’m not in the mood.”

“I’m not teasing.” He shakes his head, “What’s the problem?”

“There’s no problem, obviously.” Barty snickers, “Come on, we can just… we can forget about it by tomorrow if it’s weird.

“What’s weird, Crouch?” Regulus pressed, “I don’t understand.”

Barty looked at him for a moment, eyebrows drawn together in the middle, and his mouth slowly fell open, “You don’t know?”

“Know what?” Regulus asked.

“About me…”

“About you… what?” Regulus shook his head.

“About…” Barty sighed, shaking his head in delirium. He laughed, at himself, mostly, which only confused Regulus more, “Everyone said it was obvious. I just thought we both… I thought we had an understanding. That we’d both ignore it and go on with our lives.”

“What the fuck are you talking about, Barty?” Regulus asked, shoving at his chest.

“Oi!” Barty snickered, “That I… well… I thought you knew you’d be my first choice for everything.”

Regulus froze, scowling at him for a moment, “Don’t tease-“

“Not teasing, Reggie.” Barty looked away, taking a short breath. “Look, if it’s… if it’s too weird, I get it. But, I’m okay pretending, if you want.”

“P-pretending?” Regulus whispered.

“Yeah.” He shrugged, sitting up and loosely hugging his knees, “Pretending I’m not in love with you.”

Regulus didn’t have an answer for that. He was truely wound speechless. Barty… loves him?

“I meant it… I’d pick- I’d pick you over everything else in this world. I really mean it, Reggie. I promise.” Barty mumbled, “You’re my first pick, always have been.”

Regulus’ heart stops in his chest for a moment. His throat hurts and his eyes sting again. Regulus doesn’t think he’s cried as much as he has today through his entire life, including when he was a baby.

He can’t help it, crying again. Because Regulus believes him. Barty’s always been devastatingly honest, even at the worst of times. So why would he lie about this? And he looks so earnest, sounds it too. He sounds like he really, truely means it.

No ones ever picked Regulus first, besides Barty Crouch Jr, who has a collection of Regulus’ things, and who stares at him unashamedly, and consoles Regulus when he cries even if it makes him uncomfortable.

And Regulus has been too self centred to ever notice.

But Barty is in love with him, and by the sounds of it he has been for a while. Apparently everyone knows it.

He thinks about it for a moment, while he sobs and cries and heaves. Barty does all that he can to soothe him, reaching out to wipe away tears, and hold him, and rub his arms and back.

Regulus doesn’t think he’s ever felt as safe as he doesn’t when he’s around Barty. Which is an odd thing to realise, because Barty is kind of a loose cannon. He’s violent, and angry, and snarky and rude. But with Regulus he’s always… well, he’s funny, and he can still be a little rude sometimes, but he’s also kind and generous and a little odd.

Regulus now realises all that oddness he’s noticed is just things Barty does that signals he’s in love with him. But Regulus has never noticed, he’s never looked to see how Barty doesn’t do all these very things with other people.

He’s Barty’s first choice.

And now that he thinks of it, Barty might just be his.

He’s the only person Regulus trusts to see him like this. Not even Pandora could, as much as he loves her. Regulus just hates being vulnerable. But he supposed it’s a little different with Barty, because he’s always been a little vulnerable with Regulus.

It’s comforting, to say the least, to have confirmation that he’s wanted. That he’s cared for. That he’s somebodies first choice.

And Barty loves him, which is strange. He’s never looked at Barty in that way before. And sure, Barty makes plenty of jokes about finding Regulus fit and wanting to snog him and so on and so forth, but he’s never thought too deeply about it.

He does that with other people, doesn’t he?

Now that Regulus thinks about it, he definitely doesn’t do it as much as he does it to Regulus.

Barty pulls away, rubbing up and down Regulus’ biceps, as he gives a nervous smile. It’s crooked, like most of Barty’s smiles, but this time Regulus really notices it.

“I’m sorry if it’s weird, I dunno what to do, Reggie.” Barty tries, “How do I stop you crying?”

Regulus sniffled and blinked his tears away slowly, refusing to cry anymore. His cheeks are all wet and sticky, and his eyes fucking ache, as well as his throat, but he’s not thinking about that.

“Do you really mean that?” Regulus sniffles, and he blinks away a few more tears, “Me being your first choice?”

“Of course, why would I lie about that, Reg. It clearly means a lot to you- I just… I thought you knew.”

Regulus scrunches up his nose, “Well, why would I cry about how I’m no one’s first choice if I knew I was yours?”

Barty’s quiet for a moment. He retracts his hands and ducks his head to mumble, “I just thought… well I thought I didn’t really matter, at the end of it all.” He shrugged, “I’d do anything for you- I already have, you know, and… I just… I thought you knew. And I thought it didn’t matter to you because… well, I’m the same, I suppose. I don’t think anyone’s picked me first either.”

“You still… even thinking that I just- I just didn’t care about you, or your feelings or… or anything at all, you still…” Regulus scrunched up his nose, ducking his head to catch Barty’s eye, “You still would have picked me first?”

Barty nodded, “Done anything for you.”

“Oh.” Regulus whispered, shaking his head, “Barty…”

“Yeah?” Barty asked, swallowing a large lump in his throat.

Regulus kisses him. No thoughts, no warnings, no nothing at all. He just leans forward and kisses him right on the mouth.

Barty pulls away first, almost immediately, wide eyed and startled, “What the fuck did you do that for?”

“I don’t know.” Regulus muttered, touching his lips, “You just… I… you love me, and… fuck, Barty. You’re my best friend.”

“Yeah.” Barty nodded, there’s water in his eyes now, and Regulus can tell he’s trying to hold it back, “And you just kissed me. Please don’t- don’t do that. I’m… I can’t handle that, Reg. I can handle us being friends, even though it’s driving me mad, but… I just- I can’t-“

“Well, don’t you want to be more?”

“Fucking hell, Regulus.” Barty leers back.

“What?” Regulus scoffs.

“You can’t just fucking… don’t say that.” He shakes his head, taking a moment to compose himself, “Don’t be stupid, orrite. I can’t fucking… I love you, Reggie. I can’t handle… possibilities because I’m just… I’m gonna drive myself crazy thinking about them. And that’s not good.”

“I’ve never had someone love me before, Barty.” Regulus whispers, “I’ve never had someone… I want- I want to chose you too. You’re my best friend, and I already do choose you. But I want to do it more. I want to… please?”

“I don’t understand, Reg.” Barty whispered back.

Regulus took his hand, smoothing his fingers over Barty’s rigid knuckles. They’re rough and scarred, just as they always are. Just as Regulus knows them to be.

“I don’t really either, Barty.” He admits, “I never knew you felt that way, and I’ve never thought about it- you- us. I’ve never thought about us like that before, but I… I can picture it.”

Barty closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

“I’m not trying to hurt you, Barty. I don’t want to lead you on. I want to try. Don’t you want to try?”

Barty keeps his eyes sealed shut and he shakes his head no, “What happens when you get bored of me? What- what happens when Potter comes crawling back to you? What happens when you realise I’m fucking… more insane than you thought? I’d- don’t tempt me, Regulus, because I meant what I said, I’d do anything for you.” Barty’s breath trembles, “I’d kill him, I’d kill them both. I’d kill all of them, just to make you happy. So you never feel like a second choice to them ever again- I- I mean it, Regulus.”

“I know.” Regulus breaths, and it scares him, what Barty’s saying, because he does know. It’s not just words. But those words aren’t the part that scare him, it’s the fact that he likes it that does. It makes him want. “I know, Barty. And I know that if I hurt you, truly, truly hurt you like this, you’d make my life a living hell. I know.”

“What about Potter?” Barty asks, trying to mask tears of his own, “Don’t you love him?”

“Maybe.” Regulus admits, regretfully so, “But I don’t want to. He’d never… he could never love me the way you could anyway. The way that I need.”

“And how do you need it?”

“To be your first choice.” Regulus whispered, “How do you need it, Barty?”

Barty took a deep breath, thinking about it for a moment. He looked up at Regulus with a pout and hopeful eyes, “I just want to be good enough for love before anything else.”

Regulus smiles, “You are.”

Barty shakes his head.

“You are.” Regulus confirms, “To me, you are.”

Barty sniffles, “Do you love me… like that?”

Regulus sighs, “N… no.” He scolds himself for the truth, because it seems to shatter Barty’s heart to pieces. “But I want to, Barty… I want to love you the way you do me. And I think I will. You just have to let me.”

“Really?” Barty sobs.

Regulus nods, “Will you let me?”

Barty nods and leans back in, and Regulus kisses him again. They both had wet cheeks, and headaches, and heartaches from crying, but they kiss anyway. And Regulus cries again, for hopefully the last time, because Barty kisses like he never wants to stop.

Regulus has never been kissed like that before.

Regulus has never been loved before.

He thinks with Barty, he might just be enough.

★ ★ ★

Bartylus shippers unite.

This one’s so angsty I’m sorry but I can’t help it and yerr Reggie kinda has misogynistic views which is gross but it’s the fucking 70’s and look at his parents. I USUALLY write them all to be better than that and not arseholes but I wanted to make this one hurt.

Also I don’t think I’ve written from Reggie’s pov before sooooo that was interesting.

Idk I liked this. Let me know your thoughts :)

Read here on ao3

If you want to read more of my stuff you can find it all here :))

Tagging everyone that expressed interest in the angsty bartylus one shot lmao: @lapassemirroir @mayflywrites @garlicbread4ever @moonyluv-s @managingmischeif @stxr-bxy @the-lionsheart @crimsonlovebartylus

#bartylus #regulus black #barty crouch jr #using Jegulus as a plot point for bartylus 😬🤭👀🤷#Reggie has so many big feelings but he’s never got to express them before the poor baby #it’s okay. Barty’s here to save the day #also Barty is a Ravenclaw. and so skinny it’s concerning. he’s trying to defy his dad by being the opposite of the big man he wants him 2 b #Barty is also awkward. not good at emotions but feels them so violently anyway. Barty is also a loose fucking cannon.#barty thinks he doesn’t matter when he actually matters to regulus most of all. they both just didn’t know it yet #and then they kiss and get married and have lots of babies #pandora my beloved and lily both get honerable mentions of being wonderful wonderful women. even though Reggie hates Lily he still thinks #she’s amazing #marauders #slytherin skittles #prev Jegulus #barty x regulus #fluff at the end #angst #kinda Jegulus slander #fluff if you squint #so much angst #dead gay wizards #dead gay wizards from the 70s #RAB #Barty jr #Reggie

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eloise175 · 6 months

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Hand placement. His hand placement.

That’s it that’s the post.

#AAAAAAAA #the couple ever #Callisto’s big hands 🤭#how is Penelope resisting—I would’ve fainted #we’ll be fed real good with today’s chapter #penelope eckart #penelope eckhart #callisto regulus #penelope eckart x callisto regulus #villains are destined to die #vadd #death is the only ending for a villainess #death is the only ending for the villainess

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bri-cheeses · 5 months

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The Skittles Finding Out About Rosekiller Pt. 3:

(Part 2 is here)

Barty and Evan are sitting on the couch in the common room when Regulus approaches them. The fact that they’re sitting in each other’s personal space despite the other side of the couch being perfectly empty does not escape Regulus. Nor does the fact that Evan is nestled into Barty’s side, held there by Barty’s arm, which is slung around Evan’s shoulders. They’re talking, Evan’s head turned up towards Barty, their faces only mere inches apart. All in all, the overall effect is one that screams the impression that they are not simply friends.

And at this point, Regulus has had more than enough of these mind games, and he’s fed up with it.

So he walks around the back of the couch, into their line of sight, and plops down aggressively on one of the armchairs that is in front of them. He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees, and massages his forehead with an exasperated expression.

Barty, an empath, senses something is wrong, so he asks Regulus what’s up.

And Regulus looks up at the both of them with a desperate and slightly frazzled expression on his face, then shoots a questioning glance at Dorcas, who is sitting in the armchair opposite of him. She gives him a slight nod, and Regulus turns back to face Barty and Evan.

He takes a deep breath before saying, “You know, I didn’t really want to do this, since I hoped that it would eventually just be obvious. But I have been so confused for the last three weeks, and so I’m left with no other choice but to ask you guys straight out.”

He hesitates, but then sees that Barty has absentmindedly started stroking Evan’s arm with his fingers as he listens to what Regulus is saying, and it’s the final straw for Regulus. His next sentence comes out lacking the usual finesse of one raised in the House of Black when he blurts out, “Please just clear it up for me, are you guys dating, fucking, or literally just friends?”

And Dorcas nods vigorously to show that she shares the sentiment, while Pandora just listens to the whole exchange with a somewhat carefree but slightly intrigued attitude, all while knitting something that vaguely resembles a scarf.

And Barty and Evan glance at each other in confusion, before looking back at Regulus. And Barty says, “We thought we told you? We’ve been together since the beginning January.”

And then they act as if they’re just about to go on with their lives without saying anything more, but Regulus and Dorcas aren’t just about to let it go that easily. So Dorcas says—after digesting this new information for a second—“Seriously? It’s May, you guys. That’s five months that you’ve left the three of us in the dark on this, and now you just casually drop this information on us, then expect us to move on just like that?”

At this, Evan shoots a confused glance at Pandora, saying, “But I know that I told you, Panda. I remember, it was when we were in the woods in that one clearing with the fairies. Why didn’t you just tell Reg and Cas?”

“Oh,” she replies, “I figured you guys would’ve told them if you had wanted them to know. It wasn’t my place to say,” she says simply, before going back to knitting.

Regulus blinks. “That’s. . . that’s actually pretty good reasoning,” he admits reluctantly. “But wait a minute. Barty, didn’t you have multiple girlfriends all throughout January?”

At this, Evan groans and tucks his face into Barty’s chest. Barty’s face turns red in embarrassment as he says, “Yeah, well, it was, uh, complicated. To say the least.”

Evan then says something unintelligible into Barty’s chest, which causes Regulus to say, somewhat sarcastically, “What was that, Evan?”

Evan emerges, shooting a glare at Regulus, before saying, “By “complicated,” Barty means that we were sleeping together on a regular basis, but it still wasn’t enough for him to realize that he wanted to actually date me. He just thought that it meant that he found me to be really hot. Isn’t that right, Barty dear?”

“Shut up,” Barty whines, “I was confused. And I am sorry, you know. Besides, you did agree to it in the first place!”

“Yeah, because that’s all I thought I was ever going to get!”

His expression softens when he sees Barty’s hurt expression, though, raising a hand to brush Barty’s hair out of his face. “But we figured it out, didn’t we?” He asks, with a slight smile on his face.

“Yeah,” Barty smiles back dreamily, “we did.”

“Oh Merlin,” Regulus says, startling Barty and Evan out of their own little world. “You two are disgustingly sappy. I have no clue how I didn’t realize you guys were dating. And how did I completely miss all of this drama?”

“You didn’t, at least not fully,” Evan assures him. “Remember the first week of February when Barty and I didn’t talk to each other at all? And you guys thought it was because Barty slept the girl I liked? Well you were right about the fact that I was mad that Barty slept with her, just not because I liked her.”

Dorcas suddenly gasps, then says with a shocked tone, “And that time that I walked into your dorm, and you pushed Barty off of your bed really fast, and your guys’ faces were all red, it wasn’t really because you were having a pillow fight, was it?!”

Barty winces at that. “Actually… we were having a pillow fight. That time, at least. Not that we didn’t use that excuse later on Regulus.”

Regulus makes a disgusted face. “Ugh. I did not need to know that.”

Evan laughs at that. “Seriously though, how did you not guess? Why would we be having a pillow fight with our shirts off?”

Regulus looks taken aback. “I… I didn’t think about it. You guys are two of my best friends, so that’s not my first thought when I see something like that. Especially when you tell me otherwise.”

He levels a glare at them, causing Barty to start to apologize. “Look, we’re sorry. We really thought we’d told you! It’s just that—”

“No, no,” Regulus cuts him off. “It’s fine. I’m just expecting to hear everything later, okay?”

Barty raises an eyebrow at him. “Everything? You sure about that?”

“Most things,” Regulus clarifies. “Not all.”

“That’s what I thought.”

The conversation dies out, and Barty and Evan go back to talking about how to master the charm that Flitwick taught them about that day, and Pandora occasionally chips in with advice since Charms is her best subject. Regulus pulls out a poetry book, and Dorcas starts to study Quidditch plays.

This lasts for a while, until Evan suddenly sits up and says, “Wait a minute, Regulus, Barty and I literally sleep in the same bed every single night. And you’re seriously telling me that you didn’t realize?”

“Shut up!” Regulus says, and finally everything is cleared up between all of them, and the group dynamic goes back to the way it was before all this happened.

With some exceptions of course, as Barty and Evan are, in fact, still dating.

And that, my friends, is one of my headcanons for how the rest of the skittles learned about Rosekiller :)

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whatisame · 2 months

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A bartylus microfic with side jegulus. ~2k words. Summary: Crime is sexy. Thank you.

Rating: Mature

Regulus’ eyes hadn’t strayed from him since the moment he walked through the door.

Not that Barty could blame him. The fucker was tall and athletic, looking like he'd walked straight out of a magazine cover of Health and Style. He had probably never tried the mind-altering substances that currently fogged Barty’s perception of reality. Even through the hazy daze, he could make out the expensive fabric of his collar, his watch's golden glint, and his shoes' fine craftsmanship. He reeked of old money. Sufficiently comfortable with it to unknowingly flaunt it, like it was no big deal.

Like people like Regulus or Barty wouldn’t kill to have a taste of it.

The man was now in the kitchen alone, having successfully shaken off the flock of desperate amateurs that begged for a wisp of his attention. Regulus watched with rapt attention as the man sipped a drink.

“You should go talk to him,” Barty told him.

Regulus just rolled his eyes, redirecting them to Barty. His gaze was intense, never without a dangerous edge. Barty was surprised the tall man hadn’t felt Reg’s eyes following his every move throughout the night.

“I’m serious. It could be fun.”

“Remember what happened last time?” Regulus raised his eyebrows emphatically. “Not fun.”

He remembered pieces of it. Regulus and some guy dancing. A dirty song. The guy’s hand inching lower and lower. A crack. His knuckles aching and blood on the counter.

Barty flashed him his teeth in a smirk. “For who?”

“You have to stop messing up our plans.” His tone suggested annoyance, but Barty knew that wasn’t the case. For all the fussing Regulus put up, it was obvious that he loved it when Barty got like that. He enjoyed riling him up to the point where Barty couldn’t take it anymore, couldn’t bear watching another second of another’s hands on Regulus. He took pride in watching him go mad; biting, scratching, smashing someone’s skull against glass. No matter how hard he tried, Regulus could never fully hide the small smirk hiding in the corner of his mouth.

But Barty was a patient dog. If the reward was high enough, he could wait for his turn and watch Regulus play with someone else.

“This is different,” Barty reminded him.

“I know.”

“Then what’s stopping you?”

Regulus lowered his gaze, and when he looked at him, he was the picture of regret, all scrunched eyebrows and wide eyes. The tide in Barty’s stomach sloshed unpleasantly. He covered it up with a scoff.

“Now, don’t tell me you’ve gone soft on me, pet.”

Regulus frowned, taking a step back from him.

“I haven’t. You know I haven’t, so don’t even fucking start.” He huffed. “God, you can be such a bitch.”

“Good,” Barty said, ignoring his last comment. “It’d be a shame if you forgot what this is.”

He could feel the fury radiating off Regulus like waves. The scrunch of his brows, the downturn of his lips. He was beautiful when he was angry.

“You tell me what this is, Barty,” Regulus spat dangerously. “Just so I don’t forget.”

Barty felt a sharp pang pierce through him and smiled. There he was, the Regulus capable of cruelty that yielded words like a weapon, just as Barty did his fists.

When Barty didn’t answer, Regulus batted his hand away and took another step forward. He hadn’t realized he had grabbed him in the first place. Now, there was barely an inch of space between them, and despite having to crane his neck up to look at him, it felt like Regulus hovered over him. At that moment, there was nothing around him that felt as real as he did.

Maybe it was the drugs. Or maybe it was just Regulus, whose eyes were the sharpest silver, framed by thick dark lashes. Quietly striking. Eyes that had seen true darkness and embraced it instead of running from it. Regulus whose red mouth was meant to be chewed, spat, filled. The elegant slope of his nose. His sharp cheekbones. The freckles on his rosy cheeks. He wished he could scratch and bite and mark, but he knew he would never. Barty was a sinner at the whipping post at the mercy of a morbid executioner, who always chose to delay the fatal blow.

The violent thumping of his heart persisted as Regulus softly traced his eyebrow with his fingertip, as his hands circled his shoulders and his lips placed a gentle peck under his ear. It persisted when Regulus started pulling away and Barty’s hands flew to his hips, trapping him there, flush against him. Come home with me, he wanted to say. It scared him how much he meant it.

He lightly shoved Regulus away.

Regulus hung his head between his shaking shoulders. “Okay.”

“Reg…”

He was laughing.

“Forget it, Barty,” he snorted, “you’re right, as always.”

With that, he turned around and left.

…

Regulus didn’t care to be good. He had given up on it when he was 9 years old and the choice between hurt or be hurt presented itself to him. It wasn’t the first time he had been given the opportunity to choose but it was the first time he made the right call. Aside from the regret that had since been trained out of him, nothing and no one ever again stopped him from getting what he wanted.

He met Barty in a dark place, both figuratively and literally. He had just earned his freedom and had been yet too cowardly to dare step out of the shadows. Barty had tried to coax that out of him, but Barty himself was a dark void.

Regulus embraced it. He knew Barty wasn’t good, but Regulus had never cared about that.

Knowing everything he does now, he wondered if that still rang true.

He wondered if he’d ever made a right fucking choice in his life.

A light tap on his shoulder pulled him away from his thoughts. It was the handsome man from earlier, holding a lighter out in a silent offer, no doubt having noticed the forgotten unlit fag held between his teeth. Regulus debated whether the momentary relief was worth the unwanted company.

Eventually, he leaned in, allowing the man to light his cigarette. His hands were certain, the practiced flick of his thumb a stark contrast to his pristine image. Regulus sucked on his fag and looked at his face. Strong eyebrows, warm eyes, playful smile tucked in the corner of his mouth. Even prettier up close.

“Do I know you from somewhere?” the man asked, which irritated Regulus. He usually preferred his company to keep their mouth shut.

“Does that line usually work for you?”

The man chuckled warmly. “Usually.”

Regulus figured. A man who looked like that must know what kind of power he had. Regulus would know. He might not have the charm or the money, but he knew how to take advantage of the weapon he had.

The man continued, “But really. I know I’ve seen you before somewhere, care to help me out?”

Regulus exhaled the smoke in his lungs, then looked him up and down, a slow smile making its way to his lips. “Trust me, if we’d met, I would have remembered you.”

That seemed to please the man immensely, chest puffing out almost comically. Regulus resisted the urge to roll his eyes. It was almost laughably easy.

“Let me introduce myself then,” the man flashed him a dimpled smirk, “James Potter.”

Regulus’ gaze narrowed as he shook the extended hand. Not that he’d admit it, but the name did vaguely ring a bell. Perhaps Potter hadn’t been that off, after all.

“And what is it that brings you here, James?”

James’ eyes lit up. An overeager puppy ready to please. It almost made Regulus feel bad for what was coming to him.

“I’m new in town and I saw some flyers of this place at work, thought making some friends couldn’t hurt.” James shrugged bashfully.

“In this city?” Regulus chuckled. “Might hurt. Sorry to break it to you.”

James chuckled along. “You seem harmless enough.”

“See? You’re already too adorable,” Regulus cooed exaggeratedly before faux sadness overtook his face, “I’ll hate to watch when they rip you apart.”

“Already like me that much?” James grinned, and Regulus was horrified to find that he was enjoying the conversation a little too much.

“No, I just hate watching pretty things get ruined.”

This time, when he took a drag of his fag, James’ eyes followed.

“I think you’re playing it up,” he replied, and he was closer now, breathing in the smoke Regulus let out. “A whole city can’t be bad.”

“What about me?” Regulus looked at him through his lashes.

“What?”

“You think I could be bad?”

“I—” James breathed out, swallowing hard around the word.

Regulus dismissed the hiccup, hiding his smirk from the other man. “Tell me, James, where do you work?”

“I—uhm. Police department. Well, not really. We help each other out but it’s not like I’m a policeman or anything. I can’t say right now—it’s…”

“…complicated?” Regulus suggested.

“Yeah,” James breathed, thankful.

“So… you’re just in town for a job?”

“A big job,” James grinned. Regulus gathered that much. No one called a private detective (because it was now painfully obvious that that was what James was) to help out the police for just any case. It set his nerves on edge. “So, you know, we might be able to see each other again.”

“Yeah,” Regulus replied absentmindedly, ignoring the fact that they’d just met, and James had a serious case of coming off too strong. There were far more important things swirling through his mind.

“Sorry, was that too much?” James asked like he’d read his mind. He was looking at him apologetically, letting out a self-deprecating laugh. For the first time, Regulus noticed he was nervous. He didn’t know why he said it, but the words were out of his mouth before he could bring himself to process them:

“Want to get out of here?”

“Oh—uhm.” James’ eyebrows shot up. “Your boyfriend won’t mind?”

“My—” he looked over to where James signaled, noticing Barty at the bar nursing a drink. “Oh, God no.” He laughed at the absurdity of it. Of Barty being anyone’s boyfriend. “We’re not…”

“Got it.” James chuckled. “For a second there I thought he must be, judging by how he never left your side and by the way he started fuming the second I approached you.”

“You were watching me?”

“Who wasn’t?”

“Oh no, you’re a charmer, aren’t you?”

“Depends…” James leaned into his space, fancy cologne and top button undone fogging Regulus’ judgement. “Are you charmed?”

“You know what?” Regulus placed his hands on his hard chest. Christ, this man. “I’m not completely annoyed.”

“I’m flattered.”

“You should be.”

Their breaths mingled as they chuckled. And James’ eyes turned soft, hand coming up to tuck a loose curl behind his ear.

“You really are one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. I don’t care if saying it means I have no game, I’m so fucking glad you’re single.”

The heat creeping up on Regulus’ neck was due to James’ proximity and not at all due to his words. “Are you saying you wouldn’t take me home if I had a boyfriend and I asked you to?”

James’ arms circled his waist and Regulus felt his pulse through his shirt, saw the fluttering breath escaping him— like he couldn’t believe Regulus was letting him do as he pleased.

“Would you humor me,” Regulus continued, “if I told you to kiss me in front of him?”

James’ fingers flexed, digging into his skin. “Is that what you want?” his voice was low, lower than it had previously been, and it sent a dangerous bolt up Regulus’ spine.

“And if it was? If I wanted to use you just so he’d come crawling back to me?” Regulus’ hands traveled from James’ chest to his nape, tightly gripping the soft curls there and guiding his mouth to his, not quite touching but— “If I knew he loved me enough to put up with everything I did and I didn’t care for it? If I only used you for entertainment… What then? Would you take me home? Am I pretty enough?”

“Yeah,” James almost whined. “Fuck me, I think I would. You’re—” he tried closing the distance between their lips just as Regulus pulled back. He laughed breathily. “… unreal.”

Regulus hummed, satisfied, and took a full step back, untangling himself from their embrace.

“You’re not good, James. I’m starting to think you’ll fit right in,” he told him approvingly before turning away and starting to leave.

James watched dumbfounded his retreat, the gentle sway of his hips paired with hands tucked in trousers and the man at the bar readily following him like a guard dog.

Later that night Regulus and Barty would stay at Paris’ most expensive hotel and would spare no expense.

“Have a good night, Mr. Potter.”

“You too,” Regulus would smile at the receptionist and make his way to the elevator. Once it closed, Barty would have him against the mirror walls once, and once again against the window of their penthouse room, overlooking the city.

“We’re fucking winning, baby,” Barty would laugh breathlessly behind him as he pounded into him, and then, after they were both spent and lying between soft sheets, he would draw the same pattern over and over on Regulus’ back. A pattern the other man would never figure out.

Mine. Mine. Mine.

It would take James Potter three days before he found out that the pretty man at the bar stole one of his cards, replacing it with a torn-up piece of paper with a single black star drawn on it. It would take him no more than a second to realize he had been in the presence of notorious conman Regulus Black, widely suspected as the mastermind behind the mysterious disappearances of dozens of multimillion-dollar art pieces around France.

Their only leads? He never traveled alone, and all he ever left behind was a single black star.

#the most selfindulgent shit ever #it's really dumb but i was in the mood #bartylus #barty crouch jr #regulus black #jegulus #hehe 🤭#conmen bartylus #i think u con on men enough for the both of us hehe. omg im losing my mind #crime is hot #partners in crime #idk how to tag. clearly #mature

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