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thementalshawty · 8 months

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My New Beginning (My way out)

(Mentions of disabilities, mental, emotional, physical abuse, S*x abuse, bullying, self harm, suicidal ideation, Domestic violence, be wary before reading).

So where to begin……. This is about familial abuse, so this has been something happening my whole life!!! My “mother” is a narcissist. She bullied me and my sister our whole lives, I am the third of 5 kids, she would pit us against each other and watch us fight to laugh and make fun, most of my insecurities stem from her clowning me in front of my brothers, funny enough she is NEVER ALONE, my father he abused us including her but he left and I thought we were better off for it, I wasn’t wrong but little did I know the monsters she’d allow into our lives after, I was getting molested by older brother and my mothers boyfriend before I even got to elementary school, my brother started when I was insanely young, and I still protected him as I didn’t know what tf was happening, her boyfriend started when I was in 4th grade, he wasn’t a drunk or anything just a pedophile, she knew he was because he got caught cheating on her with teenage girls and yet she still kept him around for a decade so wherever we moved he was there and I started to become angry, rage grew inside my soul like a fire that had no intention of burning out, on top of that he was abusive hitting and bruising me and my siblings who all have disabilities, you know my sister as she’s a tarot reader on here so I’m not going into specifics about them, but she would sit and watch and do nothing, she would hide food with him, have us stand in the corner for hours on end while they are food in front of our faces “mmmm that’s good”. She even forced to drink her breast milk in front of him, she despised us having friends, soo when I would have a friend she wouldn’t let me see them or go out or we would move, I’ve never stayed more than 2-3 years in any place my whole entire fuccin life! I don’t know anything but toxicity when it came to relationships, I tried to kill myself multiple times but they failed so I decided to be a burner, I just burned myself, the fire it was the rage inside me felt outside, I decided to tell my mother about the molester from her boyfriend when I was 15, because I told someone in school he told me I had to tell her or he would so I wrote her a letter, he had a gun in the house and put it to his head and said he was going to kill himself (gaslighting), she kicked him out for a day, brought him back then told me that I had to share her with him, so at 15 and with her knowledge of him molesting me, we all moved to California, we drove there, and that was awful, we all fought and he screams how he didn’t care about what he did to me and he was laughing in front of her, i ended up just sweeping that under the rug because i went to focus on my career I had acting classes so my mind was focused but I met a guy from school and he automatically hated him (the boyfriend) he told my mother and automatically I was told to stay away from him, I didn’t I had got arrested the year before so I had community service and he was helping me with that, I told him what happened I thought we were meant to be but he cheated on me with his sister and I found myself in her another Jerry springer bind but I found that out months after we broke up, but he stood up for me and he was the only one on the outside that actually came and defended my honor as sick as he is I will give him credit for that. A year later we’re moving bacc to NYC, before we did though, they got Into a fight (my mother and the boyfriend), pretending to break up, he went to the gas station filled a gas canister wit gas came back to the front door and poured gasoline on himself, obviously not lighting himself on fire because it was an act, he went to jail a week or two later she invited him back into her life, I already knew that it was going to happen because the shit was predictable at that point, Skipping ahead to 17, we moved back to NYC, we came separately, I came on a plane with my mother and the rest of my siblings drove back with him, because obviously she trusted him with children why wouldn’t she? She already knew what he was capable of, she didn’t care 🤷🏽‍♀️, when we got back to NyC she

Promises me that he’s not coming back into our lives that it’s over this time, I told her he’s going to gaslight her she says not gonna work, fast forward to when they all made it to the apartment, she approached me with the sob story I said he would come in with so she said she is letting him stay, I was going to just walk away, but my sister told me that she fought with him on the drive here, she stood up for me, he yelled at my older brothers and her that he did What he did to me cos he truly wanted to and he’s unapologetic for it, the flame it was uncontrollable and I blacked out I went into the room and I kicked him out myself. He yelled bullshit but he left, she hated me for that, so she started to sneak him in secretly then they started hiding food again, leaving us to literally shake, starve and feel sick, we learned how to improvise with what little we had. I was going to school so I didn’t care, speaking of school I was supposed to be on my last year of school, and I couldn’t graduate because my principal explained because I moved so much my credits were all over the place, so she told me I had to repeat a year that was devasting to me because in California I only had a few credits before I could graduate, I got two jobs because I just wanted to save up money to leave, she told my grandma lies oh she has a whole bunch of recruits that she tells constant lies too about us and what we do never the truth because they already feel she’s sick but they do nothing about it, family tho right? My grandma called me and so again we told her the truth and she helped us kick him out for good, (so that’s the end of boyfriend 1…. For now) I was finally 18!! So again I have no friendships nothing ever stuck, but I had two jobs and I was saving up for an apartment, I shouldn’t have done this but I was so proud of myself! I told her (my mother) that I was going to move out, get my own apartment and live on my own, she didn’t like that, she was saying that it was disloyal and what was she going to do without me and she needed help because most of my siblings have a disability, so I stayed, I couldn’t be disloyal when she needed me, that was a big mistake. A year later we are moving BACC to California because she has found A NEW BOYFRIEND, some guy she met over the phone, guess who helped her move back to California though (boyfriend #1), my brother who molested me left to go into the army, don’t worry he’s not in it any longer dishonorable discharge (it was fitting). So anyways the new boyfriend was some white guy who I felt meant no harm the fuccin dude was quiet and softspoken so I paid it no mind, but I was wrong, he was a drunk, not only was a he a drunk, he was a RACIST DRUNK! Did she care???? NOOOOOOO! Everytime I tried to leave she stopped me, til we fought then she would say to leave knowing I had nowhere to go, if I had a friend to go too she would hate that friend, funny thing is most friends that want to take me away from this be friends she introduced me too, she wanted to be friends with them but they wanted to be my friend yes they are younger people, I don’t have those friends anymore because they were very similar to her go figure right ? I thought I should call the cops, call for help, but everyone I reached out too did nothing INCLUDING COPS! So I felt backed into a corner, well I had my sister my little sister my rock, funny fun fact though, her new boyfriend ALSO LIKES LITTLE GIRLS oh and BOYS! He got arrested and she stood up for him, while he was doing that in her home, she would run away and leave us all my siblings in the house with him drunk calling us the N word, kicking doors down and causing mess, I couldn’t leave my siblings who couldn’t understand what was happening behind all I knew is that they were scared and their mother wasn’t there all she did was make excuses for him she told me I should kill myself, that I was a cunt that didn’t deserve her name, ( I don’t have it, I have my dads last name), that I was going to be nothing more than a whore, by this time………………

She knows about what my brother did to me I didn’t mention that confession because she just skipped right over it. She literally didn’t care and she told me to my face she believed he was only playing with me and I am confusing it all and that I know nothing about it because it happened to her and she the only one who knows pain and my pain doesn’t matter she tried to assault me and again tried to tell family but she already took the narrative so they weren’t trying to hear me out or help, in august of this year, me and my sister left, we went to stay in a motel for a week or two, with the help of my booking agent we didn’t have enough money to stay and the homeless shelters were all full and we’re not answering back, so we had no choice but to go back, we are back and nothing even a week later back to the drunk racist, not eating, starving routine, I wanted to die and I felt like a failure! I couldn’t even get out of bed I felt like I deserved this I got my sister out to end up right back 2 WEEKS LATER?!?!! I fuccin hated myself! He was drunk and again causing ruckus, she came back a morning later and was telling him to leave, he was going to hit her, my brother (diagnosed with MR) was out there with my younger brother (autism) and they were scared and standing up for her and the boyfriend was in their faces what was I supposed to do???? Me and my sister tried to help and she tried to tell us to leave for helping her!!!!! Me and my sister decided to just call the police, they started to fight, and he tried to kill her, the police got him out, and they told her that she was lucky to have her kids here, we cleaned up her room after he broke her whole house apart, I mean EVERYTHING IS TORN APART RN!!!! she decided that she was going to move down to Texas with the molesting brother because he has kids, (oh yeah other fun fact she kept forcing me to have kids she even wanted me to give her my eggs so she can have kids with both of those boyfriends she approached me TWICE ABOUT IT, one she wanted my eggs and the other she wanted me to be pregnant for her!) So now my brother has kids she was like saying she knows I’ll never have kids and I’ll be forever alone, that no one will ever love me, anyways skipping to now my birthday came and left I’m 27 now! The housing program that me and my sister signed up for began to pend and we found a place! We didn’t tell her we found a place and that we were in a program we didn’t even tell her that we went down the city. We ended up getting a random woman come into the house and serve us she was evicting us (my mother) even on the eviction notice it says no fault just cause, she didn’t even tell me, so we have 60 days to leave and vacate her premises! Funny enough yesterday my sister got her APPROVAL NOTICE!!! Mine is still pending but I know that I’m getting approved and if all goes well we will be in our transitional home on SATURDAY! We finally did it, dug our way out, I didn’t think that I could and that I would, I would’ve been opened up to someone if I didn’t believe that it was against the family or that no one would love me like she did, she painted the world as such a unloving place and that this toxicity was normal and for the longest I believed it, but I am waking up now! And I am looking forward to beginning my life AWAY FROM HER! Just me and my rock @silvershiningtarot I AM NOT ASHAMED OF MY STORY, I’m only ashamed I kept quiet for so long, I allowed them to get away with everything and they took control of the narrative but I’m taking my power back! This is the first chapter of my success story! I’m not looking for claps or sympathy or for yky to actually care or anything I just wanted to put my story out there because this shit shouldn’t be in the dark anymore, mothers can be demons, family can be a dark and scary word for people and they’re not family, only relation! And I wanted to make that clear! RELATION DOESN’T MEAN FAMILY

I feel more familial love from you guys on here than I ever did anywhere! My music gave me hope and tarot gave me community

You deserve to know your reader through and through!

Thank you!!! For listening and taking the time for hearing this sad ass story, I hope I didn’t drag your day down! 💋

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numinousredpanda · 1 month

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Psychic Fever

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I canNOT wait until the Tarot/Astro girlies get ahold of the boys so I can read charts and pulls, It should be noted they have a "Psychic" in their name lol. I would do it myself but I'm so bad at it lol

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ziracona · 2 years

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Me every single time I’ve made the mistake of trying to be friends with a psych major.

#Batman the telltale series #telltale batman #the enemy within #‘you’re drawn to the criminally insane. there’s something about them. the danger. the chaos. the energy’ INSANE THING TO SAY AVESTA!!!#I know this is how psych majors think they’re entitled to talk but this is not!!! an okay normal way for strangers to talk to strangers!!!#what is WRONG with you girl!! also no! that’s not it at all but you couldn’t understand you’re a cop #it’s wild how those people will talk to you like they know you better than you know you with the force of god and be wrong every time #psych majors will read this post and think ‘Ah this person is intimidated by someone’s ability to look them over and see all their hidden #truths laid bare. To catch every trick and lie and secret and tick and mental issue and see how it works. and is reacting defensively to not #being able to hide from that being read.’ babe no I am afraid of the Wild damage people who think this way automatically cause 24/7 even #wildly good psychology professionals aren’t right 100% of the time I’m scared of high school bullies going into the med field thinking #they’re psychic Christ and so deep because they’ll notice one personality trait and decide you must be bipolar #psych majors

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orcelito · 1 year

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they are literally so married for Real

#speculation nation #fanny reads trigun #vash fretting over him (still half naked bc ???)#wolfwood being like 'stop being Stupid' STILL making fun of him even now #i am actively taking psychic damage from the section following this but dont worry about that lol #im also enjoying wolfwood being forthcoming about details for once #he turned vash in waited 7 months and was like 'aight guess thats enough death and destruction' and broke him out #& now that his job's over and he's cut n run from his employer he's telling vash the actual truth #im enjoying this so fucking much man whaddahell #trigun spoilers/

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usedtobemygirl · 1 year

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no offence but if you are one of the ugly ass bitches who purposefully feeds into peoples paranoia/delusion and preys on mentally ill ppl in the form of tarot card readings i hope you die

#like there’s truthful tarot card readings .#and then there’s ‘if you’re seeing this someone is stalking you and has hexed you’ on tiktok #like ? in what world is saying that okay .#you know everybody who sees it is Not Well .#the fact u perpetuate this in the name of’spirituality’ is so gross #also im really struggling w this shit right now .#idk what’s real and what’s not and I’ve spent sm money i don’t have on psychics n tarot readers n witches lol #bc im ill #and idk what’s real n what’s not. fuck you #txt

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espiritogato · 2 years

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We all hate hearing “I told you so.” But I told you so! 😂

Sorry, but sometimes you see it coming or feel it strong.

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darkhopping · 2 years

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if i finish transformers prime and i find out that its somehow more appalling than songs of war im going to eat my fucking keyboard

#LIKE #SURELY THESE KINDS OF MEDIA WITH THESE SPECIFIC TROPES #ARENT ALL LIKE THAT #SURELY SONGS OF WAR CANT BE SOMEHOW BETTER BY VIRTUE OF HOWEVER MISHANDLED THE ATTEMPT WAS #IT AT LEAST FUCKING TRIED #sample size of 2 is too small but still #i realize that i could simply find out the answer by reading tv tropes but i dont want to deal with the psychic damage the truth presents #songposting

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coffeeblogs428 · 4 months

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Her cry

I don’t know. I just don’t want to talk about this.

You know how I felt after a month of practice and getting rejected inside 4 walls?

It was a rejection disguised in a selecting face.

And you already know the students there were already the ones from the previous year, mostly PG’s. And the others were taken on account for the influence of some of their relatives there.

Ah.. The whole day was a meltdown. I had tried hard. But as a girl that was my best. I tried not to tear up while driving. I was like, “Anyone don't ever try to come in the way of a rejected girl or you’ll regret her desperate smash”.

And that was it. My mom called. I couldn’t talk to her with the huge lump in my throat. As soon as I arrived home, I shut myself in my room and burst out on my knees and sobbed,

“I know this is your decision. And I know you have something good for me. But can’t I just tear down for a minute? Won’t you comfort me for a minute?”.

Then minute turned out to be an hour. I trudged out with sore and puffy eyes to have my dinner. I didn’t say much to my mom, knowing that I’ll mess that up by breaking down again.

But I said. ”Those walls knew it mom ” She agreed, in silence.

I dozed off on her lap that night. After a hard day it felt like God’s embrace in the midst of my stormy blues. One of the dreary nights of my life.

That was lengthy mourn. But feeling good after letting out a loud weep of 15 minutes. Still ringing in my ears.

#snippet #truth #subjectivity #deep thoughts #psychic #coffee #sip #coffee beans #college life #student life #life series #alone with my thoughts #reading

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sanctapia · 4 months

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I’m charging $8 for 12 minutes of tarot card work and spiritual healing, I’m tactful but direct and I may offend because truth telling requires hurt feelings

I will do a Psychic evaluation of your life, I’m a real Psychic and I could read minds and find the answers to your questions

Send me $8 on Venmo $SanctaPia

On Tumblr messaging if they have it

#psychic #autism #aspergers #tarot reading #mind reading #truthful #catholic #traditional catholicism #esp #BloodDiamond

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nellasbookplanet · 3 months

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Book recs: black science fiction

As february and black history month nears its end, if you're a reader let's not forget to read and appreciate books by black authors the rest of the year as well! If you're a sci-fi fan like me, perhaps this list can help find some good books to sink your teeth into.

Bleak dystopias, high tech space adventures, alien monsters, alternate dimensions, mash-ups of sci-fi and fantasy - this list features a little bit of everything for genre fiction fans!

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

Lagoon by Nnedi Okorafor

Something massive and alien crashes into the ocean off the coast of Nigeria. Three people, a marine biologist, a rapper, and a soldier, find themselves at the center of this presence, attempting to shepherd an alien ambassador as chaos spreads in the city. A strange novel that mixes the supernatural with the alien, shifts between many different POVs, and gives a one of a kind look at a possible first contact.

Nubia: The Awakening (Nubia series) by Omar Epps & Clarence A. Hayes

Young adult. Three teens living in the slums of an enviromentally ravaged New York find that something powerful is awakening within them. They’re all children of refugees of Nubia, a utopian African island nation that sank as the climate worsened, and realize now that their parents have been hiding aspects of their heritage from them. But as they come into their own, someone seeks to use their abilities to his own ends, against their own people.

The Scourge Between Stars by Ness Brown

Novella. After having failed at establishing a new colony, starship Calypso fights to make it back to Earth. Acting captain Jacklyn Albright is already struggling against the threats of interstellar space and impending starvation when the ship throws her a new danger: something is hiding on the ship, picking off her crew one by one in bloody, gruesome ways. A quick, excellent read if you want some good Alien vibes.

Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*

After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Includes darker examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.

Midnight Robber by Nalo Hopkinson*

Utterly unique in world-building, story, and prose, Midnight Robber follows young Tan-Tan and her father, inhabitants of the Carribean-colonized planet of Toussaint. When her father commits a terrible crime, he’s exiled to a parallel version of the same planet, home to strange aliens and other human exiles. Tan-Tan, not wanting to lose her father, follows with him. Trapped on this new planet, he becomes her worst nightmare. Enter this book with caution, as it contains graphic child sexual abuse.

Rosewater (The Wormwood trilogy) by Tade Thompson

In Nigeria lies Rosewater, a city bordering on a strange, alien biodome. Its motives are unknown, but it’s having an undeniable effect on the surrounding life. Kaaro, former criminal and current psychic agent for the government, is one of the people changed by it. When other psychics like him begin getting killed, Kaaro must take it upon himself to find out the truth about the biodome and its intentions.

Do You Dream of Terra-Two? by Temi Oh

Young adult. A century ago, an astronomer discovered a possibly Earth-like planet. Now, a team of veteran astronauts and carefully chosen teenagers are preparing to embark on a twenty-three year trip to get there. But space is dangerous, and the team has no one to rely on but each other if - or when - something goes wrong. An introspective slowburn of a story, this focuses more on character work than action.

The Best of All Possible Worlds by Karen Lord

After the planet Sadira is left uninhabitable, its few survivors are forced to move to a new world. On Cygnus Beta, they work to rebuild their society alongside their distant relatives of the planet, while trying to preserve what remains of their culture. Focused less on hard science or action, The Best of All Possible Worlds is more about culture, romance and the ethics and practicalities of telepathy.

Mirage (Mirage duology) by Somaiya Daud

Young adult. Eighteen-year-old Amani lives on an isolated moon under the oppressive occupation of the Valthek empire. When Amani is abducted, she finds herself someplace wholly unexpected: the royal palace. As it turns out, she's nearly identical to the half-Valthek, and widely hated, princess Maram, who is in need of a body double. If Amani ever wants to make it back home or see her people freed from oppression, she will have to play her role as princess perfectly. While sci-fi, this one more has the vibe of a fantasy.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

Where It Rains in Color by Denise Crittendon

The planet Swazembi is a utopia of color and beauty, the most beautiful of all its citizens being the Rare Indigo. Lileala was just named Rare Indigo, but her strict yet pampered life gets upended when her beautiful skin is struck by a mysterious sickness, leaving it covered in scars and scabs. Meanwhile, voices start to whisper in Lileala's mind, bringing to the surface a past long forgotten involving her entire society.

Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!

Chain-Gang All-Stars by Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah*

In a near future America, inmates on death row or with life sentences in private prisons can choose to participate in death matches for entertainment. If they survive long enough - a rare case indeed - they regain their freedom. Among these prisoners are Loretta Thurwar and Hamara "Hurricane Staxxx" Stacker, partners behind the scenes and close to the deadline of a possible release - if only they can survive for long enough. As the game continues to be stacked against them and protests mount outside, two women fight for love, freedom, and their own humanity. Chain-Gang All-Stars is bleak and unflinching as well as genuinely hopeful in its portrayal of a dark but all to real possible future.

Parable of the Sower (Earthseed duology) by Octavia E. Butler*

In a bleak future, Lauren Olamina lives with her family in a gated community, one of few still safe places in a time of chaos. When her community falls, Lauren is forced on the run. As she makes her way toward possible safety, she picks up a following of other refugees, and sows the seeds of a new ideology which may one day be the saviour of mankind. Very bleak and scarily realistic, Parable of the Sower will make you both fear for mankind and regain your hope for humanity.

Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor

Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.

War Girls (War Girls duology) by Tochi Onyebuchi

In an enviromentally fraught future, the Nigerian civil war has flared back up, utilizing cybernetics and mechs to enhance its soldiers. Two sisters, by bond if not by blood, are separated and end up on differing sides of the struggle. Brutal and dark, with themes of dehumanization of soldiers through cybernetics that turn them into weapons, and the effect and trauma this has on them.

The Space Between Worlds (The Space Between Worlds duology) by Micaiah Johnson

Multiverse travel is finally possible, but there’s a catch: No one can visit a world where their counterpart is still alive. Enter Cara, whose parallel selves happen to be exceptionally good at dying. As such she has a very special job in traveling to these worlds, hoping to keep her position long enough to gain citizenship in the walled-off Wiley City, away from the wastes where she grew up. But her job is dangerous, especially when she gets on the tracks of a secret that threatens the entire multiverse. Really cool worldbuilding and characters, also featuring a sapphic lead!

The Fifth Season (The Broken Eart trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin*

In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter. While mostly fantasy in genre, this series does have some sci-fi flavor, and is genuinely some of the best books I've ever read, please read them.

The Women Could Fly by Megan Giddings*

In an alternate version of our present, the witch hunt never ended. Women are constantly watched and expected to marry young so their husbands can keep an eye on them. When she was fourteen, Josephine's mother disappeared, leveling suspicions at both mother and daughter of possible witchcraft. Now, nearly a decade and a half later, Jo, in trying to finally accept her missing mother as dead, decides to follow up on a set of seemingly nonsensical instructions left in her will. Features a bisexual lead!

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden

South African-set scifi featuring gods ancient and new, robots finding sentience, dik-diks, and a gay teen with mind control abilities. An ancient goddess seeks to return to her true power no matter how many humans she has to sacrifice to get there. A little bit all over the place but very creative and fresh.

The Summer Prince by Alaya Dawn Johnson*

Young adult. Young artist June Costa lives in Palmares Tres, a beautiful, matriarchal city relying heavily on tradition, one of which is the Summer King. The most recent Summer King is Enki, a bold boy and fellow artist. With him at her side, June seeks to finally find fame and recognition through her art, breaking through the generational divide of her home. But growing close to Enki is dangerous, because he, like all Summer Kings, is destined to die.

The Blood Trials (The Blood Gifted duology) by N.E. Davenport

After Ikenna's grandfather is assasinated, she is convinced that only a member of the Praetorian guard, elite soldiers, could’ve killed him. Seeking to uncover his killer, Ikenna enrolls in a dangerous trial to join the Praetorians which only a quarter of applicants survive. For Ikenna, the stakes are even higher, as she's hiding forbidden blood magic which could cost her her life. Mix of fantasy and sci-fi. While I didn’t super vibe with this one, I suspect fans of action packed romantasy will enjoy it.

Babel-17 by Samuel R. Delany

1960s classic. Rydra Wong is a space captain, linguist and poet who is set on learning to understand Babel-17, a language which is humanity's only clue at the enemy in an interstaller war. But Babel-17 is more than just a language, and studying it may change Rydra forever.

Pet (Pet duology) by Akwaeke Emezi

Young adult novella. Jam lives in a utopian future that has been freed of monsters and the systems which created and upheld them. But then she meets Pet, a dangerous creature claiming to be hunting a monster still among them, prepared to stop at nothing to find them. While I personally found the word-building in Pet lacking, it deftly handles dark subjects of what makes a human a monster.

Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool

Lion's Blood by Steven Barnes

Alternate history in which Africans colonized South America while vikings colonized the North. The vikings sell abducted Celts and Franks as slaves to the South, one of which is eleven-years-old Irish boy Aidan O'Dere, who was just bought by a Southern plantation owner.

The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow

Young adult dystopia. Ellie lives in a future where humanity is under the control of the alien Ilori. All art is forbidden, but Ellie keeps a secret library; when one of her books disappears, she fears discovery and execution. M0Rr1S, born in a lab and raised to be emotionless, finds her library, and though he should deliver her for execution, he finds himself obsessed with human music. Together the two embark on a roadtrip which may save humanity.

Womb City by Tlotlo Tsamaase

Lelah lives in future Botswana, but despite money and fame she finds herself in an unhappy marriage, her body controlled via microchip by her husband. After burying the body of an accidental hit and run, Lelah's life gets worse when the ghost of her victim returns to enact bloody vengeance.

Orleans by Sherri L. Smith

Young adult. Fen de la Guerre, living in a quarantined Gulf Coast left devestated by storms and sickness, is forced on the run with a newborn after her tribe is attacked. Hoping to get the child to safety, Fen seeks to get to the other side of the wall, she teams up with a scientist from the outside the quarantine zone.

Everfair by Nisi Shawl

A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.

The Splinter in the Sky by Kemi Ashing-Giwa

Space opera. Enitan just wants to live a quiet life in the aftermath of a failed war of conquest, but when her lover is killed and her sister kidnapped, she's forced to leave her plans behind to save her sister.

Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: The City We Became (Great Cities duology) by N.K. Jemisin, The Lesson by Cadwell Turnbull, The A.I. Who Loved Me by Alyssa Cole

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patsliftedgifts · 1 year

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$5 per question

Message me for help finding answers

I find missing people for free

Channeling ancestors, loved ones who passed, finding that treasure your grandfather buried ...

Message me for help, thanks!

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vivmaek · 4 months

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LUNAR PHASES

The moon acts as a guiding light within the night sky and humans have used it to orient themselves within time and space since the dawn of our existence. However, our connection to the moon goes beyond practicality. Looking up at the moon evokes a sense of comfort, and its beauty is inspirational. As much as our planet has changed, for better or for worse, the moon remains consistent with its cycles. This sense of stability offers us wisdom, and each period of the lunar cycle represents a different stage of growth. I was inspired to write this post after reading a fascinating article that is titled, “Effects of different phases of the lunar month on humans.” The Author, Ujjwal Chakraborty, explored the ways in which the lunar cycle exerts influence upon human psychology and physiology. Chakraborty states, “The altered autonomic neural activity and cardiovascular activity during different lunar phases is probably one of the fundamental causes of the changes of human physiology.”(2014) The autonomic nervous system regulates heart rate, digestion, respiration, blood pressure, and sexual arousal. Any changes that occurs within the autonomic nervous system is going to affect human behavior. To see a spiritual phenomenon be explained through scientific research is incredibly thought provoking; this leads me to believe that the spiritual meanings attached to each lunar phase must hold a certain amount of truth to them. If anyone is interested, the article can be found here. Chakraborty has a few other articles dedicated to lunar research that are also quite compelling. If this information intrigues you, I’d recommend looking into “The Transylvania Effect.”

I. Lunar Phase Personalities

Click here to calculate the lunar phase you were born under.

✰ New Moon - Individuals born under this phase tend to be psychic and are gifted in their ability to acknowledge the unseen. They represent new beginnings and trust their inner instincts. This can make them rather impulsive at times. New moon babies seek out adventure and are dedicated to the process of learning. They want to experience all that life has to offer them and are not afraid to dream big. This is the only phase of the moon that is absent of light, and because of this new moon babies naturally stand out from the rest. They also make for efficient leaders because their emotions and ego are in alignment. However, they’re not the types to seek attention and would prefer to work behind the scenes. Their introverted qualities and reserved nature spark a lot of intrigue. People born under this phase can find potential within any endeavor and always have a fresh perspective to offer up. Learning how to embrace the unknown is a major life lesson for these types.

✰ Waxing Crescent - These types can appear timid, but once you get to know them they are incredibly lively individuals who are full of curiosity. They prefer to stick to the things that they know and might struggle with accepting change. People born under a waxing crescent moon might get stuck within the past at times. Being courageous is something they struggle with. However, they still feel a desire to go out and explore, but they will approach these adventures with a practical mindset. Waxing crescent babies are attached to their comfort zone and are good at maintaining this even when chasing after new experiences. They are also good at finding the right people to associate with. Security is everything to these types, and they prefer to build deep relationships with people who will be in their life for a very long time. I’ve noticed that these individuals might feel more awkward than they come across. They are perfectionist and struggle with self criticism, they might get stuck within their own head during social exchanges.

✰ First Quarter - There are not many individuals born under a first quarter moon, which makes these types out to be rather unique. These people are the “main characters,” and they know it. They are not afraid to take charge of their own lives and are highly ambitious. Individuals born under this phase are not dependent upon admiration or attention. The only person they’re looking to impress is themselves. First quarter babies embrace challenges. The more challenges a situation throws at them, the more likely they are to succeed. The type of person who never backs down, they love putting their skills and talents to the test. Someone looking for a solution is going to be drawn to an individual born under a first quarter moon. Their strong personalities invoke action within other people and they serve as a source of inspiration. These individuals become unstoppable once they develop patience and learn how to wait.

✰ Waxing Gibbous - A sense of maturity is immediately evident within these individuals. They are natural caretakers and people often seek them out to be nurtured. Waxing gibbous babies have a calm presence that elicits a sense of peace within others. These types maneuver social situations with grace and making friends comes easy to them. They inspire other people to be better, and some might try to emulate them. Other people notice their potential and can see what they’re capable of achieving, but individuals born under this phase struggle to see it within themselves. They might feel life they somehow always fall short or will tell themselves that they are not “enough.” This is the opposite of how people are perceiving them. They must learn how to care for themselves in the same way they care for other people. Developing a deep sense of self love is vital for waxing gibbous babies.

✰ Full Moon - Individuals born under this phase are filled to the brim with energy. They might come across as more aggressive than they intend to be. Learning how to gain control over their emotions is a major life lesson for these types. Full moon babies might feel as though they are being pulled in two opposite directions. Their ego and emotions are not in alignment, they feel stuck between passion and logic. Sometimes they will chase after their desires even if that's not what's actually best for them. They can see themselves going in many different directions and it can be hard for them to choose just one. This indecisive behavior frustrates other people, especially those who depend on them. These individuals will find more success once they develop a sense of consistency within their lives. Their sense of creativity is deserving of focus and should not be overlooked. As much as their spontaneous nature might frustrate people, they also bring with them a sense of excitement and this is greatly appreciated.

✰ Waning Gibbous - People born under this phase are often sought after for their wisdom and ability to teach. These old souls are great at communicating their thoughts and learning comes easy to them. It is unlikely that they will have to be taught the same lesson twice, they are not the types to make the same mistakes over and over again. However, being judgmental of others may be a struggle. These individuals need to understand that not everyone is going to learn as quickly as they do. They might become frustrated watching their friends running into the same issues over and over again and will offer up unsolicited advice. It would be best to let people come to them, people will ask for help if they need it. These types tend to place themselves within positions of authority and might struggle with their listening skills. They’re often caught lecturing people when really they should be listening.

✰ Third Quarter - These types are sentimental individuals who are capable of finding deep meaning within everyday life. They hold an appreciation for the little things and show gratitude for what they have. Third quarter babies become easily attached, it can be hard for them to move on from the past. They take things slowly and aren’t likely to be caught up within a rush. Their loyalty is often taken for granted, as well as their kindness. They are commonly found within their own little world. Nostalgia maintains a strong hold upon these types. However, this connection to the past can create unpleasantries within their present life. They may be quick to forgive, but that doesn't mean they’re over it. Sometimes this can be unfair, third quarter babies need to learn how to let go of the past when it's for the best.

✰ Waning Crescent - The ultimate day dreamers. Waning crescent babies have an extremely active imagination and are highly creative. They often have visions of what's to come and very little takes them by surprise. People are drawn to their deep insight and are attracted to their unconventional personalities. These types have a mystical presence, it seems as if they are from another world. Their opinions are uniquely theirs, which can sometimes lead to them being outcasted. However, they thrive when alone and oftentimes complete their best creative work during these moments. Throughout life, they remain true to themselves and are not afraid to embrace their eccentric qualities. They have lots of unconventional wisdom to offer. Many of these types are psychic and are in touch with the spiritual realm, but don’t quite realize this. Learning to embrace and trust their intuition is a big lesson for these types.

II. Living in Alignment with the Lunar Cycle

✰ New Moon - Plant your seeds. This is a time to set new intentions and begin new projects. Take it easy by planning a relaxing night in so you can get in touch with yourself. Forget about the past so you can focus on what's best for the present moment. Journal about your hopes and dreams and think about the steps you can take within the next week to get closer to your desires. Burn a white candle, and incorporate the smell of tangerine, lemon, and jasmine into your routine.

✰ Waxing Crescent Moon - This is the time to be productive. Make sure to partake in healthy habits, give yourself an extra hour of sleep by going to bed early. Continue to build upon the goals you set for yourself during the new moon. Practice meditation to remain focused within daily life. Eat a meal that would be beneficial for your health. Burn a green candle and incorporate the smell of bergamot, cedarwood, and ginger into your routine.

✰ First Quarter Moon - Take time to focus on what's working for you and what isn’t. What tweeks need to be made within your daily routines and habits? Try to complete any tasks you’ve been putting off under this lunar phase. Go for a walk and listen to music that energizes you. Burn a red candle and incorporate the smell of patchouli, lemon and ylang ylang into your routine.

✰ Waxing Gibbous Moon - Practice patience and journal about the times in your life in which you persevered. Focus on the progress you’ve made thus far and show gratitude for what you have. Try to complete whatever preparations are needed for the next few days so they will run more smoothly. Burn a yellow candle and incorporate the smell of rose or juniper into your routine.

✰ Full Moon - Celebrate all the work you’ve completed by doing activities that bring you happiness. Have a fun night out with friends, take yourself out to your favorite restaurant. This would be a good time to focus on socialization. Make an effort to show your friends and family some love. Burn a pink candle and incorporate the smell of sandalwood, cardamom and cinnamon into your routine.

✰ Waning Gibbous Moon - Take time to reflect on the lessons you’ve learned within the past couple weeks. This would be a great time to declutter your space. Make an effort to let go of any disappointment or minor inconveniences that have been bothering you. Be kind to yourself and journal about the opportunities certain failures have brought you. Burn a light blue candle and incorporate the smell of lavender and tea tree into your routine.

✰ Last Quarter Moon - Remove yourself from your burdens by engaging your mind with relaxing activities. This would be a good time to sit within nature. Read a book, watch one of your favorite tv shows or movies. Journal about recent frustrations so you can get them off your chest. Practice forgiveness for yourself and for others. Burn an indigo candle and incorporate the smell of peppermint and eucalyptus into your routine.

✰ Waning Crescent Moon - Prepare yourself a comfort meal and draw a hot bath. Stretch your body and practice breathing exercises. Give yourself a massage or ask someone else to give you one. Focus on what you are drawn to as well as the desires that are developed while in a state of relaxation, try to write them down. Burn a purple candle and incorporate the smell of frankincense, sage, and lavender.

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bazoonga-bazinga · 1 year

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He never knew what Mob meant when he said his powers go out of control

Finale Spoilers

This page is what broke me when I was reading the manga.

Reigen never knew. He knew that Mob has lost control of his powers because Mob had told him about it when they had met

However, he never saw ??? in action. Ristu has seen ???. Teru has. Dimple has. We, the audience, have. Hell, even Touichirou can relate because he knows what it's like to have your psychic powers consume you and lose control of your body. But Reigen? This is the possibly first time he has even thought of this happening to Mob. On a surface level, he has no frame of reference for what is happening to Mob.

Despite this, in the end it was Reigen who dealt the final blow to stop Mob’s rampage. He did so the only way he knew how: by telling the truth.

Whether or not Mob knew that Reigen was lying, before all this, doesn’t matter because the main point of Reigen saying he doesn’t have psychic powers was to help Mob realize that he isn’t alone when it comes to having a hidden side or a different identity.

Everyone has or has had a part of himself they didn’t like. Reigen didn’t have the guts to let others see that part of himself before...

But to help Mob, he let Mob see that part of himself. He did it to push Mob to accept ??? as being a part of the rest of Kageyama Shigeo.

#mp100 #these thoughts could go further but its 11:32 pm and i am schleepy #Re*mob shippers get out of here. do not touch this post i hate you all. this post is not for you (written in advance)#mp100 spoilers #mob psycho 100

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moonkissedvisions · 2 months

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Pick an image tarot reading: Your natural gifts 🎀🍓🧁

Important: 16+. This is a general tarot card reading. Take what resonates and leave the rest. Tarot readings are not meant to be a replacement for any professional advice. I use the Rider-Waite deck. Take a deep breath, think about the theme/question of the reading and pick an image. Let your intuition guide you and HAVE FUN!

🎀 First picture

cards: 6 of Cups, King of Pentacles, 5 of Swords.

🎀 Multitalented

🎀 Inner child

🎀Generosity

🎀 Compassion

🎀 Playfulness

🎀 Creating a beautiful atmosphere

🎀 Cooking

🎀 Decorating

🎀 Jewelry

🎀 Retailer

🎀 Drawing

🎀 Painting

🎀 Collecting

🎀 Servicial

🎀 Money

🎀 Finances

🎀 Comedy

🎀 Working with kids

🎀 Poetry

🎀 Charity

🎀 Imagination

🎀 Instruments

🎀 Memory

🎀 Discipline

🎀 Self control

🎀 Material world

🎀 Counseling

🎀 Security

🎀 Self esteem

🎀 Humility

🎀 Crafting

🎀 Asking questions

🎀 History

🎀 Adaptation

🎀 Inspiring

🎀 Fashion

🎀 Philosophy

🎀 Speech

🎀 Abundance

🎀 Nourishing

🎀 Assertiveness

🎀 Therapy

additional notes: you may be childlike and/or have a baby face. you are forever young. you are outgoing. you like presents. you like learning about the past/your ancestors. you may have melancholic and nostalgic thoughts and emotions. you have a lot of energy. you are caring. you like a bit of destruction and mess (whatever that means for you). you may like wearing adornments. you may have an abundance mindset. people may feel comfortable and happy around you. you may have a hard time letting go of stuff. you may like self-care. Leave a 🎀 if you picked this reading!

🍓 Second picture

cards: The Devil, The Lovers, Wheel of Fortune.

🍓 You could be a 6 in numerology, since you got both 6 life path number cards (The Lovers VI, The Devil XV). 6 may be a significant number to you, or you embody 6 number codes and energy.

🍓 Strong sexual and personal magnetism

🍓 Attracting people

🍓 Sensuality

🍓 Dealing with taboo and dark themes

🍓 Loving

🍓 Generous

🍓 Business

🍓 Tempting

🍓 Unmasking the truth

🍓 Strong intuition

🍓 Designing

🍓 Passionate

🍓 Psychology

🍓 Making love

🍓 Holistic medicine

🍓 Dominance

🍓 Beauty

🍓 Decision-making

🍓 Devoted/devotion

🍓 Romance

🍓 Surrender

🍓 Acceptance

🍓 Wisdom

🍓 Good luck

🍓 Deep understanding

🍓 Manifesting

🍓 Communication

🍓 Effortless persona

🍓 Relationships

🍓 Good lover

🍓 Family oriented

🍓 Artistic

🍓 Beautiful

🍓 Considerate

🍓 Appreciative

🍓 Magic

🍓 Aware

🍓 Psychic

🍓 Occult/hidden

additional notes: you may be considered sexy or conventionally attractive. people are curious about you. people tell you their secrets. you go through a lot of changes in your life/identity. you may be multi-talented like the first pic people. you are considered an open-minded person but at the same time you may be a conventional/traditional or conservative person. you like having a healthy lifestyle. you may not like sharing many stuff about yourself and that could make you a mysterious person. you like witchy stuff/ are open about witchcraft. you may get obsessed easily. you may have a lot of secrets. you may have to deal with self-pity. Leave a 🍓 if you picked this reading!

🧁 Third picture

cards: King of Swords, Strength, Justice.

🧁 Compassion

🧁 Determination

🧁 Integrity

🧁 Power of thoughts

🧁 Power of the unconscious

🧁 Focus

🧁 Respect for life, its cycles and the natural order

🧁 Caring

🧁 Harmonious

🧁 Patience

🧁 Control

🧁 Veterinary

🧁 Taming

🧁 Problem solving

🧁 Wildness

🧁 Royalty

🧁 Law

🧁 Sharpness

🧁 Command

🧁 Good balance of feminine and masculine energies. ☯️ There is an overall balance in you.

🧁 Judge

🧁 Popular

🧁 Honesty

🧁 Impartiality

🧁 Rationality

🧁 Incredible logic

🧁Intellectual

🧁 Unbiased

🧁 Fatherly

🧁 Authority

🧁 Intelligent

🧁 Discernment

🧁 Writing

🧁 Sense of justice

🧁 Giving and gaining respect

🧁 Political/good at politics

🧁 Hierarchy

🧁 Leader

additional notes: you may be a control freak. you deal with emotions harmoniously but you could also seem cold or may dislike emotionality. you are deeply spiritual though. you may be or come across as judgemental to some people but you have a fair judgement. people come to you for advice and help because of your perspectives. you sense when things aren't right or something is unfair. you may love animals and nature. maybe you have a lot of pets or you fight for animal rights. you may be bookish. you like power/feeling powerful and strong and being in high positions. you may have a clean style or like neatness. Leave a 🧁 if you picked this reading!

Thank you for reading my post! I hope you loved it.

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