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salty-jade · 10 months

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Steps: Hand Holding

Pairing: Tom!Peter Parker x Fem! Reader

Theme: Fluff, just fluff.

Summary: Peter wants to hold hand with you, but how are you going to do that without exlpoding every single time he touches you?

Note: Okay, I'm back at it again. I think... Tbh this is sort of based on my own what if of myself once I have that special someone. also, I did this all in one go, so no edits whatsoever :D. If there is something triggering in this pls let me know!

Everyone in you circle of friends knew you had the biggest crush on Peter Parker. Obviously they didn’t know why since he was sort of a nerd and a geek at the same time. Well for you, that wasn’t a deal breaker since you liked him because he was just him. Loving, caring, sweet and if you look closely, actually handsome. Nevertheless, your friends were supportive and tried everything to get you two together.

So it came to no surprise for them that you two ended up together. Though, it was really because you discovered his secret identity by accident when you were taking out the trash at the same alley way where Peter would change into his super suit. Plus point for you since you saw his bare torso, which you swore justified your case on how handsome he was.

Still, because of that incident, you two became closer, and bloomed into something more. So now your friends are gushing over the possible things you and Peter would do as a new couple. Eat lunch together, walk to class together, talk about each other to other people, hold hands.

Wait.

Hold hands?

As in you and Peter’s fingers locking together while swinging your arms as you both cross a field of daisies???

Nope. Nope. and NOPE!

If Peter had a big secret to keep from the whole world, you had one too. Well, it’s not as huge as Peter’s but still something that you don’t want other people to know about. Peter’s your first boyfriend, therefore you’ve never really been physical with a guy before. The only people you could tolerate physical touch was the men in your family.

“Oh, don’t forget protection ok?! tell him to wrap his junior before sticking it in”

“Also, consent is important for both you and him okay girl? also…”

While your friends kept giving you tips on how to essentially ‘turn on’ your boyfriend and please him, all you could think in your head was about how you were going to even hold hands with him when he asks. forget sex, you could die just from holding hands!

So far, Peter hasn’t really touched you in anyway whatsoever. Heck, when you both confessed, Peter couldn’t event try and land a kiss on you because suddenly his senses alerted him of a villain so he had to drop you off somewhere safe before going out to battle.

The moment he wrapped his arms around your waist to hoist him up, your stomach was doing flips, face becoming different shades of red, and your brain turned into mush. You had to dunk your head into the bathtub to cool yourself from the heat of your face. You thought something was wrong with you. You thought it was weird for someone to be overstimulated with just a few touches with your partner. The romcoms you watch in your laptop certainly made it seem so. It made it seem like an amazing experience where you and your partner could share sweet moments together and just enjoy each other’s presence and act like it was only you two in the entire world. Well, both your heart and mind could not handle that much intimacy.

Was it because you’ve never date anyone before? or was it because you just have high expectations so your afraid of underperforming. Regardless of the reason, it was better to come clean to Peter rather than just keeping it to yourself.

Just as you made your self-declaration, you felt and hand on your arm, pulling you closer to another person’s body.

“Hey there Y/N!” your body, as if it was on auto-pilot, jumped at his touch and voice and instinctively backed a bit to hard unto your locker. Causing it to temporarily shake both the locker and somewhat your body due to the shock. Peter, being the lovely boyfriend he was, felt bad since he thought it was his fault for startling you and tried to hold you to help soothe the pain. Before he could do that though, you again backed away from him and kept a safe distance from him so he couldn’t touch you so you wouldn’t turn to mush.

“Hey! Hey Peter! umm how’s it going?” the fact that you tried to deescalate the situation to make it seem less awkward, just made the situation more awkward. Peter could only raise a brow at you and replied to your question.

“Everything’s good. yeah. I just wanted to see if you would want to walk to AP calculus together…” He said. The sound of guilt and confusion lingered in his voice as every time he raised his hand even slightly you would sort of jerk away from his touch.

“sure sure. we can do that, I just need to…” you looked around your surroundings to find a place where you could cool down for a bit before getting to class. Luckily, you found a bathroom.

“go to the bathroom real quick that’s all! So wait for me okay?! great!” before he could even reply, you dashed across the hall and into the bathroom to spare you the embarrassment.

One of your friends just patted Peter in the back to help reassure him that that was just who you were. “don’t worry, she LOVES you to death. she’s just shy that’s all.” and with that, your friend group had dispersed, each going to their own classes for today.

While you were in the bathroom checking the mirror to see if your face was still red from being touched by Peter. It wasn’t that Peter was not allowed to touch you. In fact, you really wanted to hold hands with him, but your body just reacts in the weirdest ways and your brain perceives it as you being overstimulated.

Before going out again, you took out a few books from your bag and carried them instead, just so could occupy them and avoid holding hands with Peter.

Peter saw you coming out of the bathroom, and he gave you his honest smile and walked up to you.

“I can carry those books for you if you wa-”

“NO!” ok that response was too fast, let’s try that again.

“I mean, no need. It’s ok! besides, you wouldn’t want people to know about the ‘thing you have right’?” you let out a dry chuckle, knowing that your excuse was the dumbest thing Peter might have heard in his entire life.

The whole walk towards class was weird in general. Peter kept wanting to try and find an opening to at least hold your shoulder or at least offer to carry your stuff so he could hold your hand, but something tells him that you were intentionally avoiding that opportunity for him. In the end, when you both made it to your seats in class, you both just exchanged notes while you tried to send him cute doodles so that he didn’t feel too bummed out about not being able to hold your hand.

You knew he didn’t deserve this treatment. He should be able to hold his girlfriend, kiss her whenever he wanted to. But, you just couldn’t handle the overload of affection from him. He was like the sun, while you were the midnight sky shying away from everything.

You both went on with your days as if you were just friends. Peter still tried to find an opening to at least graze your hand but, nothing. He sensed there must be something wrong with you. Maybe he was imagining things when you actually confessed that you liked him? was he reading the signals wrong? whatever it was, even Peter couldn’t solve this with only his intuition only. It was best that he asked you directly instead.

As soon as you both stepped out of the school, where a good few inches of empty space were between you and Peter, peter turned to you before you had the chance to escape the awkward situation.

“Can we talk?” he said. Your instincts were telling you that he probably wanted to talk about what happened this morning and your over all behavior today. I mean who could blame him, the whole day you’ve been avoiding his touches and advances the best you could so that you wouldn’t explode from an overload.

“y-yeah sure…”

Peter and you agreed it be better to talk about it back at his place since May wouldn’t be around the apartment. Though, it didn’t help you calm your worries since this is more about how are you going to explain it to Peter rather than having to go through May’s constant teasing of the two of you.

And now here you were, in his apartment.

alone.

together.

on the couch.

NOPE NOPE NOPE! even if there was no contact between you two, for some reason this situation alone was enough to make you overload. Even a blind person could tell you were nervous about this whole situation. You were as stiff as a tree, you wouldn’t even let yourself relax into the couch and sat in an upright position with your legs shut close together, while your hands were a=placed on top of them in the form of fist. Where even your knuckles started to turn white. Ok, now is a good as time as any for Peter to bring it up.

Peter sat back down on the couch after he grabbed you both something cool to drink. For some reason, he knew this conversation was going to make you burn up.

“Okay, umm… did I do something wrong?” your head shot up to look at him the instant he said those words.

“WHAT?! NO! I-I mean…. no… well, I mean there is something wrong but it’s not you per say… rather,” and there you go, falling a part as soon as you opened your mouth. God, you wish you could just crawl into a hole and die rather than explain the weirdest thing about you. But as you looked into his eyes. his warm brown eyes, you knew he deserved to know. So, you took a deep breath and tried to carefully construct the next few sentences in your head so that Peter can understand you.

“just so were on the same page, you noticed I’ve been trying to avoid… touching you right?”

All Peter could do was nod at your statement. He decided it was best if he added some words to it as well.

“Yeah, and I mean I get it if you don’t want us to be physical because if that’s your preference then by all means go-” You waved your hands in the air to tell him to shut up for a bit.

“No, no that’s not what I meant…I guess you could say I’m the weird one” Peter was sure he wasn’t following what you were saying just now. How could you be weird?

“Look, I don’t know why I’m like this, but… I’ve never had a boyfriend before and the thought of being in a relationship is new to me. What’s also new to me is the fact that I get to be physical with someone that I have really like and…” you looked back again at his face to see if he was following you along before continuing.

“The thought of even just holding hands with someone, especially you, just overwhelms me. I feel warm and fuzzy of course when I’m with you, like my heart just wants to jump around the room. But at the same time it feels like it might just burst and I feel like a PC that just short-circuits due to the heat. I guess you could say I get overstimulated? I’m not sure what to call it, but that’s just how I am…”

You didn’t realize that you were curling up into a ball on his couch when you finished your explanation. it did make a nice place to burry your head into so that you could calm yourself down for a bit before hearing Peter’s reply to what you just said.

Peter felt, giddy? like as if he saw the most cutest plush bear in the world and wanted to hug it so tight cause it was so cute. That was how he felt after your whole explanation. Your reason was totally valid, but on the other hand it also make Peter want to hold you close and see your face get red in the cutest way possible. Though, that might just make things worse.

You heard rustling from the other side of the couch and watch Peter hold up one of his fingers to you. Your brows furrowed at his sudden act.

“Let’s try something. I hold up one of my finger, and you just touch mine with your. how bout that?”

You swore this whole situation felt like something a pre-school teacher would do to a kid to get to know them.

“come on just humor me. Besides, think of it as a training exercise for yourself” and so you did.

You held out your index finger and connected the two together. You felt like Peter was E.T and you were the young boy in the movie.

“Are we recreating E.T here?!”

“I don’t know, maybe~” you giggled at his response.

“Ok, how bout we try this now,” Peter held out all his other fingers, signaling you to do the same with your hands. You showed signs of hesitance but you wanted to try even for a bit.

You unraveled your hands and brought both of your fingertips together slowly. First the thumbs, then the middle finger, the ring finger and finally your pinky. Your stomach felt like it was fluttering, along with you heartbeat starting to pick up the pace.

Peter could tell you were starting to “short-circuit” as you described. So he let you know it was ok if you didn’t want to continue. “We can stop if you want.”

you shook your head while keeping your hand steady in the air with his. Both of your fingertips were still touching, not once have you flinched away from his.

“I-it’s okay, I really wanna try holding your hand” the last bit of the sentence you dialed it down a bit so that Peter couldn’t hear it. Though, we all know he could hear it.

As if you were an astronaut taking your first step on a planet, you slowly brought you palm closer to Peter’s. Peter has not moved an inch from his position, so all of this was your own doing. Then slowly, but surely, your hands were clasped together. Now you could feel your face starting to burn, and your heart was pumping faster. This was only just hands touching, imagine if you did some of the things your friends kept telling you about.

Peter felt proud of you, even though he could see your face turn into different shades of red, but proud. Now, he felt like doing something bold, maybe you weren’t ready for it, but he wanted to at least try and see your reaction.

“I’m gonna do something so, be prepared ok”

“what?”

“Trust me” trust me. Never would you think those were the words from Peter that would make you turn into mush.

Peter then did the unthinkable, well at least for you. He shifted his hand a bit and slowly intertwined his hands with yours. Now, your fingers were interlaced with each other. You were both now holding hands. Something Peter wanted to do for the whole day. His hold on you was firm, not to the point where it hurts, but firm in a way that says he would never let go of you.

Your eyes widened, your instincts are telling you to pull away and stick your head into the bathtub filled with cold water. are your hands starting to sweat? you think it does. Are you sweating? maybe? God you are! What’s happening? can you still see Peter? Yes, but right now you really don’t want to turn into a tomato in front of him so you look to the side so that your hair is covering your face and avoid looking at him. But despite all that, your hand was still holding his. Never letting go.

Peter thought enough was enough so he tried to pull a way so that you could at least breath. Surprisingly, you were the one that held on.

“I- I don’t want my efforts to go to waste, or yours. So… is it okay if we stay like this for a bit” you were still looking away from Peter, but you lowered your hands so that it was comfortably resting on the couch.

“My heart is like beating a thousand miles per second right now I think, but I-I’m okay…” You finally looked at Peter. Your cheeks were flushed with shades of red, and your eyes seemed more like a doe to Peter now. God, he really wanted to hold you close now.

He shuffled a bit in the couch, trying to close the distance between you little by little.

“Is this okay?” Peter asked. He was still an arms length far from you, but closer nonetheless. You nodded. He then shifted closer, asking the same thing, and you replied the same. After going back and forth a bit, Peter was now only a few inches away from your body. You both still kept some form of distance, but the proximity between you two was closer than you could ever imagine. Peter asked one last time.

“How about this? Is this too close for you?” He said, almost like a whisper. Your heart had reached it’s breaking point, your brain was already in the process of turning into goop, your body was overheating as if gas was leaking out of your skin. Yeah, this was your limit for now Peter thought.

He backed a few inches away from you so you could compose yourself, while his eyes were still watching your every move. You finally let go of his hand and fanned yourself to cool your face.

You gave him a sheepish smile as you’re still embarrassed about the whole thing you just did with him, at the same time you were happy he tried to help you. Though, you don’t know how much your heart can take it if he keeps doing these things.

“How bout we just stick to hand holding for now?” you said.

Peter gave you his signature smile and grabbed your hand to hold it on his own. Though, he wasn’t done teasing you just yet, as once he grabbed your hand, he brought the back of your hand to his lips and kissed it as if he was a prince in a fairy tale giving the princess a greeting.

yeah, it was then and there you fainted.

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rennybu · 8 months

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Hiii Andy! I've adore your art for years and your characters. Their designs are so lovely!! And expressive!! I was wondering if you had any tips for a cohesive character design? Or even advice on adding little asymmetrical details or features? And help is greatly appreciated! Thanks! Wishing you all the best!

HELLOO!!! AAAH Thank you so much for such a thoughtful question, this makes me so happy to hear! I'm so sorry it took me so long to get back to you, it turns out I have way too many things to say about this topic AKLSDHFKLSDG

(pls take this readmore<3)

For the starting point in a design, I try to stick to whatever rules apply for the setting the character is in, and their role in that setting.

Basic colour theory is always at the back of my mind, as well. I tend to use analogous and complementary colours when I design my characters and their closets. Analogous colours keep a palette contained and feeling similar to itself without being monotone. And then using colours that are complementary to that elsewhere in the design adds contrast while still maintaining that feeling of cohesion :D

The intended use of the character also heavily affects what can make a design cohesive or not - it's very dependent on art style and medium. (A design for use in animation would be extremely different from semi-realistic TTRPG concept art. The rest of what I've written skews more towards the second option!)

I consider the colours, shapes and materials that make sense for what I want to convey about the world, and how the character would want to be presented in it. The Dogwood characters are my current exercise; Mel's clothes fit him perfectly since he works a labor intensive job on the farm, and his identity is wrapped up in it so he never strays far from heavy cotton, straight cut. Ryan and Park both wear ill-fitting clothes in completely different ways (Ryan, butchly. Park, autistic and transly) - and they each have work uniforms. Ryan's work uniform suits her gnc appearance (welding coveralls/safety gear), while Park's uniform completely transforms him into "Just Some Guy" and that changes how others read him, too (cashier). And they all shop at Local Thrift Store / Farmer's Surplus / The Walmart 1hr Outside of Town. Their styles give them each a distinct silhouette, and their levels of social comfort as well as public expression contribute to body language, colour choices, and shapes that make them stand apart from each other despite living in the same small bubble. COHESION!

Asymmetrical details and features are my FAAAAV THEY ARE SO FUN, I find inspiration for these in people-watching, nature documentaries, architecture, my reflection, my friends.. <333 This part is also fun to tie in to the character's setting! Springboard questions like. Are they prone to injuries? Magical injuries? Do they have like, modern dental procedures available? Do they give a shit about crooked or crowded teeth? Are they missing a tooth, or did they chip one? Do they smile a lot and have crow's feet/other wrinkles? Do they get a lot of sun, and do they have/use sunscreen? (Even finer wrinkles.) Did they have acne as a teen? Do they still? Are they in a combat-heavy setting, with the scars to show it? Even more uniform features like freckles aren't symmetrical.

Clothing is really good to use to play with asymmetry - maybe the character rolls their cuffs but one is coming undone a little. Jewelry of all types is also great for asymmetry since it can go anywhere on the body!! Facial and other physical deformities or injuries are also incredible to see, and should be researched to find out if they impact other parts of a person's overall health and mobility outright. The different skin texture of a birthmark, for example! I noticed in certain photographs, the subject's red birthmark changed the texture of the skin, so I started drawing Orson with one drooping eyelid on the side affected by his birthmark. The more you look, the more you find!

Before I get too carried away. I try to use asymmetrical details and features as a way to boost that "world setting" cohesion, and to bring attention to parts of the character I am personally endeared by or want other people to notice. Mahon's snaggletooth is an eternal fav, which made me draw him smiling more, which made me more prone to drawing lines around his eyes. And since the anchor is in his left hand, and he tries to hide it subconsciously, I put thumb-holes in his left sleeves, which he plucks through as a nervous fidget, and as a result, his clothes pull a little across his entire body :D ITS VERY FUN to find the right jumping-off point that lets specific details click into place. For Mahon especially, since so many of those details are derived from the setting and his role in it!

Asymmetry and symmetry are just tools at ur disposal. Asymmetry tends to be more comfortable and natural. Symmetry gives a sense of stability and can be pushed for a sense of power, a sense of being uncanny, rigid, etc. Asymmetry can also be pushed into uncaniness depending on what it's applied to!! (But as a matter of personal taste, I find asymmetrical details to feel more natural and inviting than perfectly symmetrical ones. Which. Again. Depending on the character's purpose, could equally contribute to a cohesive design!!!)

OMG ok my final thought. Asymmetry can also be used as a balancing tool which yet again lends to a sense of cohesion. Adding a detail on the left while leaving it out on the right, repeated throughout with different details where applicable. Loam's colour spots, archery gear, scars and jewelry are all areas I've played with this idea.

#asks #i hope this helps even a little!#if u want to zero in on specifics pls dont be shy to ask #I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL!!!! wishing you the best TOO!

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cozy-mp3 · 2 years

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hiiii i was wondering if u can do crybaby sub reader x dacryphilic dom abby pls :D some edging and overstim and jus abby overall being mean to the reader and mocking them while she absolutely ruins them :D pls n thank u ♡

ps: can she call reader princess pls ☺️

word count: 2.1k (ish)

warnings: a lil bit of face slapping, a lot of abby being mean, reader likes it tho, a lil bit of fluff bc i can't help myself

a/n: my first abby fic!!! and my first fic where a strap is involved! definitely the least fluff i've written so far, next fic will have to b fluffy to make up for it. tysm for the prompt nonny, i hope u enjoy! <33

MINORS AND MEN DO NOT INTERACT OR I'LL CRY

“come back here, princess,” abby calls softly from where she’s sat above you, she huffs out a laugh when she sees your messy face, your tears running down your cheeks and spit running down your chin, “open,” she tells you, the tip of her strap brushing your lips.

you sniffle and suck in a shaky breath before you open your mouth, sticking your tongue out before she has to ask, she’d let you hold on to her thighs once you’d gotten on your knees so you squeeze the firm muscle gently to let her know you’re still doing ok. you have to concentrate on relaxing your gag reflex as she pushes into your mouth, the blunt tip of her length already nudging the back of your throat causing more tears.

“there we go,” she sighs, brushing the tears from your cheeks and watching where she’s making herself disappear into your mouth. you dig your nails into her skin as she begins to thrust and she grunts from the sting, batting your hands away from her until you give up and settle them in your lap. you choke on a noise of complaint which only makes her laugh again and pinch your wet cheek, “behave,” she says, punctuating it with a snap of her hips that makes you gag and pull away from her to cough.

she leans back in her chair again with a smirk as she watches you pull yourself together again, tears rolling steadily down your cheeks as you wipe your chin with the back of your hand. you sniffle again and crawl closer to her, resting your head on her thigh and looking up at her with what you know is a pitiful expression, your eyes big and wet and your tears pooling beneath your cheek where it’s squished up against her.

abby sits up straight so she can look at you, her touch deceptively kind as she strokes your face before she pulls her hand back a few inches and hits your unobstructed cheek, hard enough to sting but not hard enough to be considered a proper slap. she coos mockingly when you whine and turn your face into her hip, her hand light as it strokes over the sensitive skin she’d left in her wake.

“i thought you wanted to suck me off?,” she asks, looking down at you with a heavy gaze until you meet her eyes again, it’s unfair, you think, that she can look so in control while you’re on your knees feeling like a mess. the only indication that she’s affected is a slight blush high on her cheeks and the slick you can see between her legs when she spreads them wide enough.

“i did,” you mumble, using your hand to wipe your eyes again as you feel more tears pool in your waterline, “i did want to, ‘s hard though,” you say, clearing your throat to emphasize your point, you’re sure you’ll be able to hear the effects of her rough treatment in your voice tomorrow. you hope, absently, that manny isn’t around to make fun of you before you’re able to drink something warm to soothe your throat.

“i told you it was this hole,” abby says as she pushes two of her fingers into your mouth, she’s unable to keep the affection off of her face when you run your tongue over the pads of her fingers, though she schools her expression again quickly and uses her free hand to tug you upright by your hair, “i told you it was this hole,” she begins again, thrusting her fingers deeper into your mouth, “or this hole,” she finishes, pressing between your legs with the toe of her boot.

you whimper, your brows pulling together and your thighs trying to close around her leg. she’d made you cum twice earlier and you’re still swollen and sensitive, your thighs sticky with your release. abby smiles down at you and pushes her fingers even deeper into your mouth, you’re drooling around her knuckles when she shifts her boot experimentally, watching the way your hands scramble to hold on to her.

“choose, princess,” she says, she sounds amused and her brows are raised expectantly, you know she knows you can’t answer with her fingers in your mouth and you whine in frustration which only makes her laugh, “that wasn’t an answer, babe,” she sighs, her tone full of fake regret, “i guess i’ll have to choose for you, since you’re too dumb to decide for yourself,” she hums, thrusting her fingers against youe toungue as she nudges her boot against you again. the moan she draws from you is garbled by her fingers brushing the back of your throat and she smiles.

you grip abby’s shin with both hands, your fingers digging into the thick fabric of her patrol pants as you try to ease the pressure of her boot on your sensitive cunt. she laughs again at the way you’re squirming at her feet, watching as you try to shift away but following each of your movements easily, your grip on her leg not much of a deterrent. she coos mockingly when you begin to cry again, using her free hand to pat your warm cheek and finally retracting her boot from between your legs.

“i think i’ve decided,” she hums thoughtfully, tugging her fingers from your mouth and leaning back in the chair again, “come sit on my lap,” she tells you, patting her thighs and smirking at the wary expression on your face, “come on, princess, i won’t ask again,” she sighs with put upon frustration after you let a few moments pass without moving.

you stand to your feet slowly, your knees protesting a little after kneeling for so long, you think you might have carpet burns, but you know abby will take care of them later so you don’t focus on the discomfort. you take a moment to stretch before you crawl into her lap and you’re relieved she doesn’t seem to mind as she runs one of her hands up your side, gently tugging you towards her by your hip when she gets impatient. you move with her easily, straddling her thighs and trying to repress a shudder when her strap brushes over your folds.

“i don’t think i can cum again,” you whisper into her neck, your hands holding her strong shoulders as she shifts you both around to get comfortable. she chuckles at you and pats your ass, curving one of her hands around to brush against your pussy where you’re wet and hot and a little bit sore.

“you don’t have to cum, princess,” she says, as if it's obvious, as if you’re stupid for even bringing it up, it makes you flush warm with embarrassment, “you just have to let me play with you, it doesn’t matter to me what your cunt does as long as you let me in,” she tells you, tugging your hair until you pull away from her neck and turn to look into her eyes, “you know you can tell me to stop though, right?,” she asks and you nod quickly, squeezing her shoulders in reassurance that you’re not so far gone you’ve forgotten that she isn’t trying to hurt you in ways you don’t want.

“dunno what you’re complaining about then, babe,” she hums, pinching your cheek hard enough that you feel it for a few seconds when she lets go. she reaches down between your legs, gripping the shaft of her strap and nuding the tip against your clit until your legs try to close around her thighs. she chuckles at the futility of the action and gently presses inside you, she goes slow and you’re wet and open from earlier so the slide is smooth all the way down. you whimper when your hips meet hers, your pussy clenching tight around the length of her as she gives you a second to adjust.

one of her hands strokes firmly down your back and comes to rest on your ass again, squeezing and pulling you closer to her body. you moan softly as her length drags against your walls, your thighs shaking where they’re forced open around the width of her spread legs. you press your face into her neck and hold onto her shoulders, her muscles firm beneath your nails when you dig them in.

“abby,” you whimper against her skin, her hips beginning to shift upwards to meet yours, “abby, ‘s so sensitive,” you gasp as she aims a thrust towards your g-spot, your pussy gushes and she shushes you when you moan loudly, your eyes filling with tears again.

“just stay still,” she tells you, her grip on the flesh of your ass tightening as she plants her boots on the floor and thrusts herself upwards at a regular pace. you can feel the muscles in her thighs bulge with each stroke, her stomach is taught against your body where you lean over her and she raises her free hand to push her fingers back into your mouth to silence your hiccuping moans.

you manage about a minute of her controlled motions inside of you before you can feel an orgasm building, you sob around abby’s fingers, tears rolling down your warm cheeks as the feeling bordering on painful grows between your thighs. you can feel your hands clench and unclench fistfulls of her shirt and your toes curl up tight as you drool around her fingers. you tug her wrist until she removes her fingers from your mouth and you have to take a moment to pant before you can speak again.

“abs, i’m gonna cum,” you whimper, digging your nails into her wrist as you look down at her, her brows are furrowed in concentration and she’s biting her lip as she watches you above her, your breasts bouncing with each thrust and your flushed little face creased in pleasure. she stops moving when you speak and takes her hand from your grip, smiling when you let out a hiccuping sob and stare down at her betrayed.

“i thought you didn’t want to cum,” she says, raising her brows at you in challenge, “i thought your poor little cunt was sore,” she continues and it’s not fair how level her voice is, how she’s still so controlled as you fall apart completely and sob in frustration. she reaches up to wipe your damp cheeks for you and gives you a look of mocking sympathy when you lean into her touch, stroking her fingers over your cheek before she pulls her hand back and gives you another not-quite-slap, her palm cupping your cheek and applying pressure to the sting when your face crumples and you sob her name.

“abby, please,” you whisper, grinding your hips into hers until she pulls her hand away from your ass and spanks far harder than your face, it stings and your brows pull together into a grimace from the pain, “please abby, i need it,” you whimper, your shaky arms aren’t enough to keep you supported and you fall forward onto her chest, your face pressed into her throat where you let out another sob, “i was wrong, i’m sorry, please i need to cum,” you beg and she finally takes pity on you, shifting her grip so her arm is wrapped around your waist as she grinds her hips up into you.

“i’ll make you cum, princess,” she tells you, stroking her hand over the small of your back in comfort, “i’ll take care of it, you don’t need to do anything,” she says, kissing your temple as she begins to thrust again, your body shaking against hers and your tears making a wet spot on her shirt.

you don’t last thirty seconds before you orgasm, your eyes closing and your hands gripping her biceps as you sob out her name and shake through it. you feel your hips buck into hers and whine as the tip of the strap presses deeper, your sensitive walls fluttering around the length of it. you can feel where your pussy has gushed, your thighs wet and sticky all over again, you sniffle and press your face into abby’s neck, taking a deep breath to calm down as she rubs your back.

“such a good girl,” she whispers, gently tugging your face from her neck so she can wipe away the tears that continue to roll down your cheeks, “did so good, princess,” she adds and you give her a watery smile, sniffling as you lean down to give her a brief kiss.

“love you,” you mumble against her lips.

“i love you too,” she smiles, gently pinching your cheek again and chuckling when you bat her hand away.

#abby x reader #abby anderson #tlou2 #tlou2 x reader #abby anderson x reader #abby anderson smut #reqs

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softxsuki · 8 months

Text

☾*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

---1.5K FOLLOWER EVENT: TROPES AND SONGS (CLOSED)

this event will close once all spots are filled!

Yes I’m doing another event for another milestone–don’t kill me please.

So welcome to my 1.5k follower event! Thank you to everyone that helped me get this far, I truly appreciate all your love and support with my writing. Interacting with some of you has been the highlight of my year and really motivates me to continue with this blog!

Anyway, onto more about this event! There will be TWO options to choose from; either trope drabbles or song inspired drabbles.

Allow me to elaborate on each one:

For tropes, you’d pick a romance trope from the list I’ve provided along with the name of a fandom, and I’d write a brief 500 word or less drabble of a character from the fandom you chose that I think fits that trope the best, along with a brief drabble of seeing the trope and that character in action (pls why is it so hard to explain this)

And for song inspired drabbles, it’s just as stated–you’d send me a song (i’ll have a few examples if you can’t think of one) along with a character and one quote from the song you’d like me to include (this is optional) and I’d write a little something for you. Under 500 words.

If this is confusing then please continue reading so I can hopefully clear those confusions up lol.

***ALSO I WILL ONLY BE ACCEPTING 10 REQUESTS FOR EACH OPTION. Once all 10 spots fill up, requests for this event will be closed. IF I happen to finish them up quickly then perhaps I’ll open them again and accept a few more. But as for right now, only 10! First come first serve!

»RULES

It would be nice if you followed me so I know I’m doing this for my followers <3 but if you don't, that's okay. Perhaps I can convince you to stick around after this? Or if this is your introduction to my blog then welcome!

I only accept character x reader requests

Fem!Reader and Gn!Reader only

SFW requests only, but suggestive material is OKAY so long as it isn’t explicitly NSFW content!

I will not be taking songs about cheating (unless reader has an ex who used to cheat, but ISN’T the character)

Pls see my rules for any other specific no-no’s lol

Mental health requests are okay!

For the song drabble requests, please read the list of characters I write for first! Pls and thank you. If you send a character I don’t write for, I won’t write your request <3

A hi, please, and thank you would be great. I don’t write things that are just demanded from me :)

please only pick ONE of the two options for this event!

» TROPE DRABBLES:

Pick a trope from the list below

Pick a fandom from the list below

Also please mention any characters you WOULDN’T want me to write this for. I want to make sure you’re happy with the end result, so listing some characters you don’t like from my list of characters that I write for in the fandom of your choosing would be great (this is optional)

Say whether this is for x gn!reader or x fem!reader

These are all going to be romantic so if you’d like something platonic then perhaps the song drabble one would be better for you!

And that’s it :D real easy

Example: “Hey congrats on hitting 1.5k! I’d love to participate in your event! Could I do the trope drabble one, with trope #1: enemies to lovers and the fandom is for one piece with Fem!Reader please! I'd like to exclude Sanji in your decision making, I don't really simp for him! Thank you!

** If the same trope is requested for a fandom, I’ll respond to your ask, saying to pick a different one! You can keep track of which ones have been used for a specific fandom in the masterlist below. I’ll write down the requests I get as they come in!

***also note that the tropes I write for the fandom of your choosing, I’ll be writing for any of the characters on my “who I write for list” so if I don’t write for any of your favs, then perhaps my blog isn’t for you </3

Tropes: (CLOSED)

Enemies to Lovers

Opposites Attract

Friends to Lovers

Secret Identity

Forced Proximity

Forbidden Love

Soulmates

Fake Relationship

Sunny vs Grumpy

Marriage of Convenience

Work Romance

One Bed

“Who did this to you?”

“I don’t believe in love” yet falls in love

You fall first, but he falls harder

He falls first and he falls harder

Secret Relationship

Royalty

(ignore the fact that some of these aren’t official tropes :D)

Fandoms:

» SONG DRABBLES: (CLOSED)

Pick a song (either your choice or one from my list) it can be a song in any language so long as english translation exists out there somewhere lol

Pick a character (one that i write for pls. You can view my list here)

Include a quote/line from that song that you’d like me to include (this is optional)

Say whether its for x gn!reader or x fem!reader

Platonic or romantic?

And whether this will be angst or fluff

And that’s it!

Example: “Hey, congrats on your new milestone! I was hoping to participate in your event if that’s okay! Could I do your song drabble one with ‘Kiss Me’ by Ed Sheeran with Zoro from One Piece. Fem!Reader please! It would be great if you could include the line ‘This feels like falling in love.’ romantic with fluff please! Thank you!”

***Please note that for songs, I’d write them based on my own interpretation of the song, so apologies in advance if that doesn’t align up with your own meaning of a song you send me!

Some song suggestions, feel free to request your own songs though:

“Cry” by Cigarettes After Sex

“Heather” by Conan Gray

“Before You Go” by Lewis Capaldi

“Star” by Colde (bro this one with Ace will hurt)

“Matilda” by Harry Styles

“Super Shy” by NewJeans

“I tried” by Daniel Seavey

“Back To Me” by The Rose

“Amor Eterno” by Rocio Durcal

“Just A Little Bit” by Enhypen

If you have any questions regarding either idea, let me know in my asks or dms!

click "more" to see the masterlist of this event!

»MASTERLIST

TROPE DRABBLES:

Trope #13 obey me

Trope #7 tokyo rev

Trope #9 aot

Trope #12 jjk

Trope #16 tokyo rev

Trope #18 obey me

Trope #1 tokyo rev

Trope #10 tokyo rev

Trope #3 one piece

Trope #1 mha

Trope #15 haikyuu

Trope #16 one piece

SONG DRABBLES:

“Begin Again” by Taylor Swift— marius TOT

“The Outsider” by Lyn Lapid—kazutora Tokyo rev

“Picture of You” by Sara Kays—Itadori jjk

“Figure You Out” by VIOLÀ—gojo jjk

“Deja Vu” by Olivia Rodrigo—Oikawa hq

“Wait it Out” by Shy Martin—Tamaki mha

“Tunnel” by Kim Sejeong—Giyuu ds

“Think Before I Talk” by Astrid S—Megumi jjk

“Hablame de Ti” by Banda MS de Sergio Lizárraga—Daichi hq

“Endless Embrace” by Myth and Roid: zoro op

“Smarty” by Lana Del Rey: Dabi mha

started: 9/12/2023

finished: tba

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frodo-with-glasses · 1 year

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More Reading Thoughts: The Steward and the King

New chapter, let’s go!

Dude Eowyn chill out lol

Eowyn: “I’m bummed because I tried to commit sudoku and it didn’t work.” Faramir: “Please don’t do that. You’re too pretty to die. But hey, if it makes you feel any better, we all might die anyway, so you might as well rest up if you wanna be able to fight.” Eowyn: “But they want me to stay in bed. And my window doesn’t look eastward :’-C” Faramir: “Oh! I can fix that! :-D”

AND NOW MERRY AND FARAMIR GET TO CHAT!! DUDE!!

First Bergil, and now Faramir!! This just in: All of Pippin’s friends eventually become Merry’s friends. When am I gonna get my scene with Beregond and Merry, huh??

(I probably won’t but a girl can dream)

Tbh I think the Warden ships Farawyn

Faramir: “I’mma give you my dead mom’s cloak ‘cause it’s beautiful and sad like you”

Faramir: “Man, it’s been great hanging out with you. I really hope the world doesn’t end now, ‘cause I don’t want to lose this.” Eowyn, a genius: “This what?”

This whole scene plays out like a cheesy Bollywood movie. It’s so over-the-top. I love it X’-D

And then everybody MAGICALLY STARTS SINGING AT ONCE

“And his duty was to prepare for one who would replace him” 👀 John the Baptist is that you??

And here we see the healing power of love *throws confetti*

YOOOOOOO WE GET MORE GONDORIAN MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS WAIT

Okay so we have trumpets, bells, harps, viols, flutes, and horns listed so far. I’m gonna want to answer that ask more thoroughly at some point won’t I?? ‘Cause I have didn’t have this information before but NOW I DO

Heyyy there’s somebody named Hurin! Hopefully his life has been better than the original one

(I can’t imagine naming your kid after someone who’s best known for having a son with the Worst Life Ever. Like, okay, sassing Morgoth to his face is pretty cool, but is it worth it?? Is it really?? Like the only thing worse would actually be naming your kid Turin. … They’ve done that too, haven’t they?)

ELFHELM!!!

ELFHELM SURVIVED!!

ELFHELM OF DAD JOKES I LOVE YOU

Hahaha hi Ioreth

“They are dear friends, I hear.” HECK YES THEY ARE

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW RIGHT YOU ARE IORETH

Listen one of my favorite tropes is when people in-universe acknowledge the bromance as An Official ThingTM, so this is PEAK. THANK YOU TOLKIEN

Faramir: “I give you my stick.” Aragorn: “No u”

Goodness GRACIOUS that is a whole paragraph of titles for Aragorn. What the heck. Who is it in my notes that always tags Aragorn as “local man has too many names, local authorities report” because you are RIGHT

“Now according to tradition, he should take the crown from his father, but given that his father didn’t have the crown and is also very much dead—”

Faramir: “I give you the crown” Aragorn: “NO U”

And now Frodo does the task of a ring-bearer in an actual wedding, which is to carry the shiny thing to somebody so they can give it to somebody else

“HEY! LET’S HEAR IT FOR CAPTAIN AMERICA!”

Woohoo King Aragorn!

WAIT

HOLD UP

‘ITS GATES WERE WROUGHT OF MITHRIL AND STEEL’??

YOOOOOO!! That’s a 100% METAL DOOR!! In a MEDIEVAL SETTING!! Even WE don’t have huge metal doors for most things, and we’re in the modern age!

First of all, imagine how shiny! Secondly, IMAGINE HOW FREAKIN’ SCI-FI—

BEREGOOOOOOOOND

HELLO MY BOO I’VE MISSED YOU

“And the king said to Beregond: ‘Beregond…’”

Pffft

I must be slaphappy, ‘cause for some reason I find his name being written twice in a row to be very funny

Aragorn: “Okay so you’re not in trouble, but you’re also not allowed to be a Guard of the Citadel anymore.” Beregond: “😨☹️😭” Aragorn: “…Because you’re gonna work FOR FARAMIR! GET PROMOTED ON, IDIOT!!” Beregond: “😧 … 🤩🥳🎉🎊🎈”

Aww haha Aragorn and Eomer hug X-D

Eowyn, to Faramir: “I’ll be back later, I promise.” Eomer, probably: “👀😨😡”

Aragorn: “Pls stick around, friends, I love you guys”

Frodo: “Pippin, you were wrong, Gandalf is keeping secrets again.” Gandalf: “excuse”

Aragorn, excitedly: “LE GASP!! A TREE!!”

Okay so lemme get this straight: Aragorn wasn’t allowed to marry Arwen until he found a tree??

Right. Okay. 🤣🤣🤣

I’m sure this is very symbolically important and whatever but it’s almost 3 AM and I just think it’s the funniest thing I’ve heard all night

GLORFINDELLLLLL

GLORFINDEL HI!!

I’VE MISSED YOU FRIEND!!! 8-D

I guess all these other elves are here too but I don’t really care ROFLOL

This chapter really is the epitome of Tolkien going “oh shoot I guess I’d better include some romance in here huh”

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dino-mp3 · 1 month

Text

blog intro :)

3-23-24

Hello I’m Dino! I wanted to make an introduction post for my tumblr since I decided I wanted to start posting to motivate myself and others! I thought it would be nice to list my personal goals, interests, etc. :)

also pls ignore any grammar issues I don’t feel like putting this through Grammarly :,)

Goals

Work towards a 4.5 gpa: I have currently maintained a 4.2 gpa for this school year I wish it was 4.5, but I have 2 b’s :( So I’m going to work towards a 4.5 for this last quarter and senior year!

Become a better speaker: My ultimate career is to be a lawyer! With that comes working to be a better speaker. I get quite nervous when it comes to taking to a large group of people and start to talk fast. On top of this at my mock trial meet I messed up my direct horribly because of how nervous I was to talk in front of the judge and jury :,)

Get best lawyer during Mock Trial Comp: I won best attorney this year, but I don’t think I deserved it…I want to be more confident in my win this time around!

4 or 5 on AP Exams: I want to get a 4 or 5 on both my AP Lang and APUSH Exams in May! I need to study and practice hard though, but I’m willing to put the hard work in ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

Practice flute more often: I play the flute for my schools band and while I have only been playing for 7 months now I have to keep up with people who have been playing for 5+ years :,) With that I want to practice more to keep up and for my personal interest of just becoming more skilled with the flute!

Turing in homework on time: I have made a bad habit of turning my homework in late which is so bad oml I need to get out of it

Exercise: I want to start working out regularly to lose some weight :) While I’m at a healthy weight I just want to lose a few pounds for aesthetic purposes, but in a healthy manner!

Love myself more: I forget to remind myself that I have gotten so far and I have evolved over the years. I want to make sure that I know that I’m worthy of love even when I’m at my lowest.

Interests

Music: I’m a big fan of all genres (even some country songs too) but I’m a big listener of k-pop! But here is a list of my favorite groups + musicians: Red Velvet, Melanie Martinez, Laufey, Idelwork, Frank Sinatra, NMIXX, Ive, Megan Thee Stallion, Flo Milli, Poppy, Lesserafim, Aespa, Newjeans, Infinity Song, Kiss of Life, and many more!

Media: I’m not going to list every kind of media I’m into but here is a small taste! Big fan of ARGs, Indie Horror games (puppet combo specifically), Mascot Horror games (FNAF + Poppy Playtime), Anime (although I haven’t watched anything recently, but my fave is TBHK), K-dramas and Thai-dramas, YouTube video essays (TRO, iNabber, Primik, Stephanie Soo), Cartoons (Owl House, Gravity Falls, Amphibia, MLP, stuff like that), RPG + Dating Sim games (Shooter game HATER here), Sitcoms, Snoopy/Peanuts, Miraculous Ladybug (biggest MariChat lvr) Twisted Wonderland (Azul my love) and a BUNCH more things I’m into, but I’m not going to list them all like I said :,)

Hobbies: Doing my nails, playing my flute, writing fanfics (don’t judge I BEGGG), reading (pls recommend books for me to read, I love the classics too), deco (for my photo cards and notebooks lol), and makeup!

I think that should suffice for my introduction, though it looks a bit long…I’m a blabber could you tell?

Anyways thank you for sticking around for the end! If you want to see any updates on my goals or read my blabber about my interests don’t hesitate to follow me! (Also follow me on Ao3 @/dino_mp3 if you’re an Azul lvr bc all my fanfics are about him) This tumblr is more of a casual stop for me to be more myself and work towards a better me :) But thank you again and I hope you have a good day/night! Don’t forget to drink water :D

-Dino

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airiat · 1 year

Text

northern sky, one. ✧˚ · .

{masterlist}

pairing: joel miller x you / f!reader (wc: 35.3k, 10 chapters)

rating: explicit, 18+

work tags: no outbreak, age difference (27/42), hurt/comfort, ptsd, fate, ldr, explicit sexual content (rough/romantic sex, light d/s & sadomasochism, dirty talk, choking/biting, oral (f & m receiving), unprotected piv, aftercare)

work warnings: themes of death (more details here, contains spoilers), depictions of mental illness/alcoholism, light discussion of theoretical relationship with minor (not condoned by either party), light blood kink

{ao3}

note: here. i've cut out my heart and laid it down beating and bloody on these pages. i needed to do this. you get to see it. this work is complete and will update every sunday bc tlou sunday. it'll be on tumblr in its entirety but also on ao3--pls just head to ao3 though i promise it's not scary there

anyway, i hope u enjoy and then comment to tell me u did thanks luv u

one. {8.5k}

Here it is. The witless beginning to the story you said you would never have. Here it is unfolding in the hallowed, wood-paneled walls of your small town’s bar. The one you always went to with your friends in high school because they’d never card, let the cheap beer flow like water. It’s the one that only plays 80s music, at home against the checkered floor tiles and the dull green vinyl of the bar stools.

There he is. The man with calloused hands built to cradle the very shape of your heart. You’d know that if you could see the grooves of his palms. You’ll know that soon enough.

He’s walking through the front door. He’s shaking snowflakes from the salt, mainly pepper, strands of his hair. He’s running a thumb over the etched-in crease between his brows, tugging the edge of his mustache, sitting down on the stool next to yours so heavily that melted snow wets your cheeks.

“Coming down hard out there,” your friend, the bartender, says as a greeting.

“Yeah, sure is,” the stranger says, coat-clad elbows against the bar top. “Don’t think I’ll be able to drive any further tonight.”

Your friend, the bartender, tilts her head in sympathy. “Well, what can I get for ya, then?”

“Beer’s fine,” the stranger answers. “Anythin’ you got on tap. I ain’t picky.”

Your friend nods and moves to fill a glass, setting it down in front of the stranger who wastes no time taking a gulp.

Here they are. The words you toss into the ether that you can never fish back out. Tongue loosened by your fourth glass of whiskey. Almost enough drink to let you trudge home through the snow, fall face-first into your mattress. Just hope you don’t drown in vomit before it’s time to wake up for the first appointment at your salon. Hope your hands stop shaking enough to give a decent haircut.

The sweaty tumbler in front of you is the wound slotted between your ribs, which coats your hands in just enough blood to make a ring slide off your finger. But just little enough to keep you dazzling, to make heads turn to you.

Still, nothing sticks. It’ll always be your palms alone pressed against that laceration at the end of the night.

“That sure is an accent,” you say. “Must be pretty far from home.”

Here it is now. The first time this stranger looks at you, like he’s only just realizing a full-blooded woman is sitting next to him. He blinks in surprise, long eyelashes framing eyes that must be brown. There’s a corner of his lip raised, but it’s humorless. Your whiskey eyes don’t delude you.

“Damn, that obvious? Here I thought I was blending right in.”

And there they are. His first words to you. You don’t see how the invisible threads are being tied into place by them.

It could have gone a million other ways. You could have been you in a bar five hundred miles from here, instead. Where they play 90s rock, and the seats are red instead of green. Where the night is warm and a girl, but sober, but with steady hands, will drive home alone and fall asleep in bed with an orange cat curled up with her.

Instead, here he is, sitting next to you. Here he is for you.

“Almost,” you say. “Don’t talk, and you’ll have it down.”

“I’ll be sure to keep that in mind,” he drawls, but then he pauses, seems to consider. “What’s your name?”

You smile, shake your head. “What’s yours?”

“Mysterious, are you? Mine’s Joel. Joel Miller.” The unneeded addition of his last name is pointed. He’ll give you more than you’ll give him. He always will.

“Where did you come from, Joel Miller?”

“The road,” he grunts, taking another swig of beer.

“The road from where?”

“Texas. Austin.”

“To?”

Joel flicks his gaze over to you. The furrowed brow does not go unnoticed. “You sure ask a lot of questions for a girl with no name.”

“I’m making conversation,” you counter. Then, you wave down your friend who would never cut you off, ask for another glass of whiskey. “You could make conversation, too, if you answered them.”

“Well, maybe I don’t wanna,” Joel Miller says, but he’s smiling at you, something small and secret, just for you.

“So, where’s the cowboy hat, Joel Miller?” you ask.

Behind you, another Tuesday night regular walks through the door donning the very thing. It’s Colorado, somewhere. Close enough to the mountains, far enough to block them out with a pinky over the horizon. It’s more ranches and dry plains, the endless expanse of watercolor sunrises.

“You think everyone from Texas is a cowboy or something?”

You shrug, take a sip of your drink. Tastes too much like water. You’d make a scene about it–you have before–but this moment with Joel is better than booze, better than yelling. If only for the time being. “Yeah. Aren’t they?”

He squints at you like he can’t decide if you’re fucking with him. “‘Course,” he says. “Just happened to leave mine in the truck.”

You squint back, but it’s to study his sun-worn face, his coat's old canvas. Maybe. But then you duck down beneath the bar to see his shoes. Come back up, grinning victorious. “Wrong kind of boots.” Work boots. The lace-up kind. “Bet you’ve never even ridden a horse in your whole life.”

“Sure I have. Once…when I was a kid.” He snorts a laugh. “No, I’m not a cowboy. And hardly anyone from Texas is.”

“How disappointing.” You give an exaggerated sigh. “Well, what do you do?”

“I’m a contractor.”

You grin. All cheek. “So, you’re good with your hands, then?”

Joel won’t look at you, but the tips of his ears are growing red. You can’t see that it sweeps across his cheeks, too. “Yeah, I guess you could say that,” he answers gruffly into the bottom of his beer.

“Maybe that works out better for us, then,” you say in a low voice, leaning closer. “I’m certainly no horse, after all.”

This has to be the moment. You’ve decided you want this. Want him. Want the heat of him, the weight, his short breaths, the quick snap of his hips, your body pressed under his.

Joel finally turns to you, and his eyes pass slowly over you–your face, your chest swathed in an old flannel shirt, lace camisole peaking through the top.

“A horse?” he says in a voice like the snow falling outside in the darkness. “No, I wouldn’t say that you are.”

You reach out and brush his hand. “There’s a hotel in town, but it’s kind of a dump,” you murmur. “You could come back to my place instead.”

“Your place?” Joel chuckles. “Kind of you to offer, darlin’, but I can smell that whiskey on your breath from here.”

You smile. Darlin’. “Could be tasting it, instead.”

Joel swipes his tongue along his top lip. “Dunno if that’s such a good idea. You seem a little…young.”

“I’m being served at a bar, aren’t I?” But then you lean even closer, lips next to his ear. “I’m twenty-seven.”

The slope of his shoulders says you’ve eased him, but he still pulls away, shakes his head. “I should really just get to sleep. Have to finish the rest of my drive tomorrow.”

You shrug. You’re not gonna cry about it. This was never really the plan. You would have just been lucky. You say farewell with a soft hand on Joel’s shoulder as you stand up, tossing a twenty on the bar. For you and him, you indicate to the bartender who is no longer your friend.

“Safe travels, then,” you tell him. Kind smile. You’re good at this.

As you leave the bar, you’re stopped by something. It’s not him. No, it’s a voice singing a familiar tune, the one that goes, All I ever wanted, all I ever needed, is here in my arms. You can’t go just yet. You like this one, actually like this one. Your hips are swaying as you go to the small space in the bar where people sometimes dance. You’re the only one there tonight, but this isn’t the first time. It never stops you.

But you’re not there for very long this time. Barely even through the second verse. There’s an arm sliding around your waist. When you look up, you meet brown eyes. Those long lashes.

It’s his turn to dip down to your ear. “Changed my mind,” Joel murmurs. “Seeing you move….” He doesn’t finish, but he doesn’t need to. You’re already threading your fingers through his, tugging him back towards the way you came.

His truck is dusted with snow in the parking lot. It’s an older one. Utilitarian. Nothing like those flashy ones that only pretend they have purpose. You imagine his tools cluttered in the bed. Imagine him driving it, sweaty and tired after work.

But now he’s pulling the passenger side door open for you, holding your hand for balance as you climb into the seat, closes the door, and gets into the seat next to you.

You’re warm with him in the cab now. The interior is surprisingly clean, smells of leather and earth, of cigarette smoke, faintly. The stereo is on from how he must have had it before, down low, playing a CD of some artist whose name is on the tip of your tongue. Minimal, mostly guitar, only one voice like it in the whole world. It suits him. You imagine him listening to it on the lonely road, mouthing the lyrics, thumb tapping against the wheel.

Joel’s driving now. Only, his thumb is brushing against your knuckles, hand resting in your lap. He’s asking you how to get to your house, and you’re directing him as he goes, but your voice is drowned out by the feeling of his hand on yours.

You hadn’t expected this. Maybe he’d have his hand on you, sure. But it should have been on your thigh. Maybe even drifting in between your legs. He should be thoughtless. He should pretend that you are nothing more than a pocket of warmth on a cold night. You don’t know what to do with tenderness. It’ll flounder and die if it’s left up to your heart to hold it.

When it starts to feel like he’s grinding glass into your skin, you pull your hand back to yourself. He glances over, but you just grit your teeth and say nothing. You’re approaching your house now, anyway.

You don’t even have to direct him anymore. Yours is the only house at the end of the dirt road. Joel pulls into the drive, and you think you should be embarrassed. It’s old and neglected–chipping green paint, sagging porch, bare bulb over the front door. A farmhouse with only your garden beds left of the farm. At least it’s tucked into the trees, so no one really has to see it.

“You leave your car back at the bar?” is the only thing Joel says.

It isn’t what you’re expecting. “No,” you answer.

“And not one here, neither. So you, what, take a cab?”

You don’t like what your response ought to be. You don’t like that he’s even asking. “Why are you asking?”

“Just confused, is all. How were you plannin’ on getting home?”

“Woulda walked.”

“Alone in the dark? In the snow? And taken you something like thirty minutes?” He’s bewildered. He shouldn’t be. This is how it always goes, and you are always fine.

“I like the fresh air. The adventure,” you reply. “So, are you coming inside…or?”

“Yeah, yeah, of course. Sorry.” He shuts the truck off, and you both exit. You don’t wait for him before you march up to the front door. But he catches up when your unsteady hands take too long with the keys.

“You, uh, you sure you’re alright?” Joel asks.

You won’t look at him; you only catch a glimpse of the white cloud his breath makes. “Yeah, I’m fine. I’ve just got a medical condition, okay? I’m basically sober. I barely drank anything.”

Two truths. A lie. But maybe you don’t like playing this game anymore. Maybe Joel and all his questions are more trouble than they’re worth. And so, you snap, “Look, if you don’t actually want to do this, you’re welcome to leave. You won’t hurt my feelings.”

And here it is. The choice. The first exit. The proof of…the proof of what? Desire? Integrity? Pity?

“Just want to make sure you’re…y’know, that this is what you want,” Joel says.

You finally get the key in and shove the door open. The house is as dark as it always is when you arrive. Quiet, too. Like the inside of the pine box you should have been laid to rest in. But you didn’t get one. You were meant to go on. To live with that.

“Come with me,” you whisper to Joel, careful not to disturb the slumbering darkness.

He follows you as you lead him to your bedroom, just as quiet, honoring the stillness. As though the Earth has paused its orbit and will only begin again once you’ve told it to.

You reach the room and stop to light the single vanilla-scented candle on your dresser. Joel starts to reach for the lamp next to your bed, but you hold a halting hand out.

“No, don’t,” you tell him.

He pauses to look at you, face golden with candlelight, warm like the final rays of a sunset. “Alright, darlin’. Anything you want.”

And what you want is to step slowly towards him, press your hands to his chest, rise on your tiptoes, and kiss him. But you don’t. You pause with your lips a breath from his.

“Never got the chance to tell you how pretty you are, did I?” Joel murmurs, palms sliding against your jaw until his fingers are laced in the hair at the nape of your neck.

You freeze a little because this isn’t what you’re supposed to hear. Hot, maybe, Sexy, maybe. But pretty? That’s meant for someone without ghosts haunting them. You were never meant to be more than warm flesh. You don’t have eyes, don’t have lungs or a heart. He isn’t meant to tell you otherwise.

But you can’t help how your eyelashes flutter, the bloody corpse of your hope reanimating. “No, you didn’t.”

“Well, you are,” he says. “Prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.”

You think this has to be a lie. You make yourself presentable because your business is beauty. Keep up with your hair color, do a face of makeup. But right now, you’re in old jeans and a holey flannel, breath tainted with stale whiskey, eyes rimmed with smudged mascara.

“Okay,” you whisper. “If you think so.”

“Yeah, I do,” he tells you. “Now, c’mere.”

Finally, finally, Joel leans in and kisses you. You can’t help your immediate sigh, open-mouthed and slack against his lips, can’t help your hands from fisting at his chest, almost pushing him away. You can’t help it. You’re not familiar with this kind of gentleness.

Joel pulls back, and your sigh becomes a quiet whine, hands clutching at his coat. If you let him go, he’ll become a wisp of smoke. You’ll wake up and realize that none of this has been real. That your mind is finally deranged enough to concoct such a beautiful illusion.

But those dark eyes looking down at you are too fathomless to be something you conjured. Your sickness would never let you create something so complicated, would never even realize that a life must exist inside of them. Because you see it all there in those eyes: every moment he’s lived, every teardrop, every piece of happiness witnessed.

“You have nice eyes,” you tell him. It’s all you can say.

“Thank you,” Joel says softly. “Now, here, just let me….”

He relocates your hands from his coat to the front of his shirt before he shrugs out of it, draping it over the back of your vanity chair. This is an appreciated change; now you can feel the shape of his muscles, slide your fingertips up to trace his collarbones.

This time, you kiss him, surrendering to your sadness as your lips meet his, aching. This kiss becomes your arms around his neck, rising on tiptoes to press yourself against his chest. His hands find the skin of your shoulder blades underneath your flannel, warm and rough on you. Warm and real. You break away long enough to tear at the buttons and let your flannel fall to the wooden floor. You still have your camisole on. It isn’t too scary.

But you find yourself backing into your bed, sinking onto it when the mattress presses into your calves. Joel is leaning over you, your head craned up, so the kiss never breaks. But, then, it does, and he’s kneeling in front of you, pulling your boots off, then gripping you behind your knees. Kissing you again so soon that it’s like he never stopped.

You wouldn’t have cared about the boots. You would walk through a sea of mud and still get tangled up in your sheets if it meant Joel would be there next to you. But he’s too considerate to even dream of it. He must be. He must care. He must want to make sure there is nothing about this that you’ll regret.

“You still doin’ alright, honey?” Joel pauses to ask you.

In this new stillness, you notice the heaviness in your chest, realize your breaths are coming short and nearly frantic. “Yeah, yeah, I’m okay,” you gulp.

He releases one of your knees to soothingly rub your arm. “We can always slow down, you know. Still got all night. Or, we don’t even have to do anythin’ at all.”

You smile at him. You can’t help it; your mind, in all its sickness, never could have dreamt up a man so gentle. “Are you hungry?” you ask him. “Got some leftover pasta, I think.”

He blinks once in surprise, but a smile comes to his face. “Yeah, sure, I could eat. Actually…that sounds pretty good.”

“Perfect,” you say. “Food, then.”

Joel rises to his feet and holds a hand out to help you up. You walk together to your kitchen, then to the fridge. Opened, it emits the brightest light you’ve seen since the sun as you and Joel stand before it. “Well, I said pasta, but I also have….” You rattle off a litany of dishes you’ve made. The fridge is full of these leftovers, the drawers still bursting with ingredients. You love to cook. You would cook endlessly, make enough food for everyone and then some, but everyone is really only just you.

“You made all of this?” Joel asks, glancing at you, but can’t help but bring his eyes back to the food.

“All of it, yeah. It’s kind of a hobby, I guess.”

“God, wish I had that as a hobby.” He steps back from the fridge. “Well, I couldn’t possibly decide. You pick.”

You hem and haw for a moment before settling on a foil-wrapped dish that contains chicken pot pie. Then comes the decision to warm it up in either the microwave or the oven…the microwave, you decide. It won’t be perfect, but Joel probably won’t mind. You’re still thinking about what came before this. You imagine he is, too.

When it’s out of the microwave, you slice two squares and plate them. Joel’s sitting on a barstool at the island–you put one in front of him and yours at the other seat. “You want anything to drink?” you ask him. “Got wine…other things.”

“Just water’s fine. This looks good, darlin’. I’m sorry, you mind if I…?” He looks at you with his fork hovering over the food. “Think it really has been hours.”

“No, no, please do,” you insist, then watch for a moment as he takes the first bite. He closes his eyes and lets out a quiet groan.

“Yeah, damn good,” Joel confirms.

Satisfied, you turn to the cabinets to find two glasses. With his water glass in hand, you hesitate to reach for a wine glass. It won’t look very good…he’s having water, and you’re…you snatch it off the shelf. Your house. You’ll do what you want. And when you sit down at the island with your wine and his water, he says nothing. Doesn’t even seem to notice, really, except enough to take a drink.

“So, you never told me,” you begin, picking at your food, then relenting and taking a drink of wine. “Where are you off to?”

“Oh, I didn’t?” he says with a mouthful of food. “Headed to Jackson, Wyoming.”

“Hmm,” you hum. “What’s there?”

“My brother and his wife just had their baby. Thought I’d pay a visit.”

“Oh, nice. Girl? Boy?”

“Boy.” Joel smiles. “Be good to have a nephew. Have a daughter, myself.”

You glance down at his hands—no ring to be found—but you still feel funny about it. You take a long gulp of wine. “You do?” you make yourself ask.

“Yeah. Sarah. Think she’s plannin’ to be there, too.”

“You don’t know?”

“Well, she and I…she and I haven’t been speaking lately.”

You don’t think you should press, but the wine has reignited your earlier haziness, so you’ll do it anyway. “Why’s that?”

Joel looks over to you, gaze lingering like he’s deciding something, but then he bows his head back to the plate of food. “First, it was that she just started college. Thought I’d give her a little space to grow. But then, she came home this past Christmas with a girl, introduced her to me as her girlfriend.”

You furrow your brow. “You don’t like that your daughter has a girlfriend?”

“Well, I mean, I didn’t know what I thought about it. It wasn’t how I was raised, you know? To think something like that is alright. And my own daughter?” His voice comes quiet, and he’s picking at his food, too. “We fought about it, and then she left early. Haven’t spoken since.”

You stab your fork into the pie crust. “If I had a kid, I’d just want them to be happy.”

“Yeah, I know. I did eventually come to see it that way, too,” Joel replies, almost defensive, but then he sighs. “She doesn’t know I’m coming, but I’m hoping she’ll forgive me.”

If he were anyone else, you wouldn’t want to reassure him, but he’s Joel Miller, so you say, “I bet she will. You seem like a good dad.”

He gives you a soft smile. “Maybe,” he says. “But thanks. Sweet of you to listen.”

You shrug. “I do a lot of listening. Part of my job.”

“You some kind of therapist or something?”

“Hairdresser,” you answer. “Almost the same thing.”

“Huh, yeah,” Joel agrees. “You been doing it for long?”

“Five years.”

“You like it?”

“Well enough, I guess.”

“Surprised you can, y’know–”

“Why, because my hands shake?” You cut him off with a snap. “All that came after. I can do my job just fine. It’s muscle memory.”

“Didn’t mean it like that. Just that it’d be impressive.”

“Yeah, whatever,” you mutter. You’re taking it out on him. You know it. But your haziness will have you let it fester. The vengeance rolls across your tongue in waves. It’s all you can do not to say it.

Joel leans in towards you, sweeps your hair away from your neck. “I’m sorry, darlin’. I shouldn’t have said it. You’ve been so sweet to me.”

The vengeance dies when you let him press a small kiss on your cheek. Your cheek. You’d forgotten you could be kissed there. It feels better than you ever thought such a simple thing could. Like a bandaid smoothed over an old wound.

“You done eating?” you murmur.

“This, yeah,” he says, nudging the plate, face still near yours. “But maybe I’m, y’know, still a little hungry for something else.”

You giggle. Actually giggle. It’s a corny line. You know it, but it’s working on you. You’re not ashamed to say so. “Yeah? Well, I have a whole fridge full of other stuff.”

Joel shakes his head, tickling your cheek with his beard. “Not quite what I had in mind. Maybe…maybe I should just show you.”

“Yes, please do,” you whisper.

“Alright,” he says with a small smile. “But first, these have gotta go.”

Your gaze follows his movement down to his boots, which he unlaces with deft fingers. It’s the kind of thing that makes your mind wander, imagine what else he could use them for. You’ll find out soon enough.

Joel leads you back to your bedroom with your hand in his. He doesn’t let go until he’s sitting on the edge of your bed, and even then, it’s only to replace your hand with your hips as you stand before him. He’s looking up at you silently, waiting. You’re breathing in the vanilla of the air, marveling as it mixes with his scent: the woods in summer, a piece of the sky, something almost like blood. You could hold it all against your chest when you lay down under the trees and pull the earth over yourself. You’ll remember it.

But you’re not there yet. You blink, and the house comes crowding in around you, too fast and too much, but you feel Joel breathing beneath you, and you settle. His hands slide from your hips to cup your rear as you sink into his lap, knees on either side of his thighs. Drape your arms over his shoulders, press your face into his neck.

“You smell so good,” you say against his skin.

Joel exhales. “Can I kiss you again, darlin’?”

“Of course,” you whisper. “Please do.”

He lifts your head with gentle fingers underneath your chin, pauses long enough that you start to melt into those dark eyes, but they’re moving over your face, lingering on every feature. Finally, his lips, with their perpetual M-shaped slope, curve up and kiss you.

All the night’s previous slowness is abandoned as Joel’s fingers thread into your hair, tugging at the roots, as you clutch at the back of his neck, forbidding each other from ever letting go. Not as though you would. Not when he’s parting your lips, licking into your mouth, drawing out a quiet moan. Not while his hands travel the road of your shoulders and down your sides, fingertips cautiously dipping under the hem of your camisole.

“Can I…?” Joel murmurs into your mouth.

You don’t answer him yet, instead moving to the buttons on the front of his shirt. You want to undo them, but your shaking hands prevent it. He notices, gently takes your place.

His shirt is discarded along with the last shreds of your hesitation. You resist the temptation to sink your palms into his chest to find the warmth of his heart. You let him continue.

First is your camisole shucked off, and then you’re sitting there in your thin bra, bracing yourself as he sees you. There’s nothing wrong with you; you know there isn’t. You know about the shadow of your ribs, the constellation of your beauty marks, the crescent moons of your breasts. There’s nothing ugly about it. But you can only unravel when he smiles, kisses the dip of your collarbone.

Your breath hitches when Joel reminds you of his tongue, licking up the junction of your neck, and again when he introduces you to his teeth as he softly drags them against your skin. You tighten your hands against his back, long fingernails sinking into his spine. He hisses through those teeth, pulling you tighter against him, arms a band around your middle.

“You gonna be sweet for me, honey?” he asks, leaning back to look at you. “I don’t have to be so gentle with you if that’s not what you want.”

Your lips part at his words. Maybe you’d be drooling if you didn’t have your decorum–or if you’d had just one more drink. “I–I don’t know what I want. But I’m not…fragile.”

“No, no, I know you’re not,” he says gruffly. “Well, then, I’m gonna stop asking you about everything. But you’re still going to tell me if you don’t want something to happen, or if something hurts in a way you don’t like, or if you just plain want me to stop. Alright?”

You nod, docile and brainless.

“And you’re not gonna be shy about it, either. You’re gonna be honest with me. Right, darlin’?”

“Yes, I’ll tell you,” you say softly. “I promise.”

“Good. Now, this first.” Joel slips his fingers under the band of your bra, unhooks it with his thumb. “Been wantin’ to see you. Know you’ll be beautiful.”

Goosebumps shimmer on your skin as he guides the straps down your shoulders, slow, making it feel like your arms go on forever. When he’s finally revealed you to him, a shiver wracks through you, probably because of how he’s looking at you: like he’s just sifted through all your layers, reached the empty space in your chest. But it’s not empty, is it? No, the light bathes his face.

He smiles. “Just as I thought. Beautiful.”

You giggle, press your bare chest against his, just as bare, and a kiss to his lips. “And what about you, huh? Most handsome man that’s ever been in my bed.”

“Probably only could have said that about me ten, fifteen years ago,” Joel disagrees lightly.

Then, as if to distract you, he wraps his arms around you and flips you around so you’re on your back. As if to make you forget the thought entirely, he kneels over you and frames your face with his hands, feathering kisses over your mouth, your cheeks. You’re grabbing his shoulders, breathless, floating, but you haven’t forgotten.

“No,” you speak hoarsely. “I’m saying it about you right now.”

His answering chuckle rumbles against your chest as he drags his lips down, attaching themselves to a nipple. You moan when his tongue flicks against it, clutching at his hair. What were you trying to tell him? Something about–he nips at you, just a little bit, and the sensitivity has you seeing stars.

You let it all go as he moves to your other nipple, as one hand grips your waist, slides down to the curve of your hip, where your skin becomes your jeans. There, his hand is all you can pay attention to, knowing what he’s asking of you.

“Joel, please, take them off.”

“You take ‘em off. I got other matters,” he tells you.

His “other matters” are to return his lips to yours and to not let you forget about his tongue, moving against yours in a new way, one that gives you some idea of another use for it. Flooded with the feeling, you’re fumbling with the button and the zipper on your jeans, pouring frustrated sounds into his mouth until he finally reaches down and yanks them off himself. When your hands meet as you go for your underwear next, he laces your fingers with his and presses your hands next to your waist.

“Be patient, pretty girl. Leave them for me.” His voice is like thick smoke.

A small moan is your agreement, enough that Joel gives your hand back, only for you to latch onto his arm braced next to you. His muscles move under your fingertips, and you consider his strength. How your hand was going nowhere, how badly he could probably hurt you, how he never will.

And it’s true: he won’t. Never in all your life. But you deserve at least that much. More.

Joel doesn’t make you wait for very long. His will probably isn’t made with as much iron as he’d have you believe, but his fingers feel sure as he slips beneath your underwear, finds the hollow below your stomach, careful to only just brush the hair there. Maybe he’ll have you beg for it. You look up and see him watching you with a contented little smile. All you can do is blink slowly back.

“Joel…” You try, but your words don’t form.

He presses a kiss to your temple. “I know, darlin’. I’ll give you what you need. Just let me relish it.”

“No, now. Please.”

His smile morphs into something more wicked at your plea, when you reach down and grab at his wrist. He lets you guide his hand toward your center but won’t let his fingers go where you need them. He’s using his strength for that control. A frustrated whine falls from your lips. Maybe you were wrong. Maybe he is an endless well of restraint. He doesn’t even kiss you–only lets his eyes roam your face.

But your own well is more akin to a puddle, on better days, the shallow end of a swimming pool. You show him this when you pull his head down, kiss him so hard that it hurts your lips. And finally, with a growl of surrender, his fingers travel down the length of your slit. Your moan drops into his mouth, his name strung after it.

“God, all of this for me, baby?” Joel rasps at the wetness gathered between your legs.

You can’t answer him because his fingers have made it to where you’ve needed him most, gliding over in slow, but firm circles. You’re tugging at his hair, holding his head, making sure his lips are there to catch all of your noises, to match your shallow breaths to his.

After a particularly sharp pull to his hair, he groans, and then his fingers move down to your entrance, lingering but not going in. There’s almost no sensation, almost unbearable after him having just worked your bud. Your frustration and exasperation have you yanked at his roots, wrapping your hand around his arm in a vice, trying to hold him there so you can move your hips to meet him. But you can go nowhere; his other hand is holding you still at your waist.

“Joel,” you whine, tears pricking at your eyes.

He’s looking down at you, pausing before he leans in and kisses you softly. “Bet I could keep you like this all night, have you delirious by morning. And you’d let me, wouldn’t you?”

Your breath comes quicker with panic, but somehow the thought is still a temptation. To let him work you down until you’re nothing more than your body, until you’re mindless and bent to his every word. It would be a pricklier sort of heaven, but heaven all the same. “Yes, I would. I would,” you say between your ragged breaths.

“Thought so,” Joel says, smug. “But I won’t. Not tonight.”

With that, he sinks two thick fingers deep into your wet heat. Throat bared as you toss your head back with a moan, he closes his lips around the thin skin, nipping until you feel raw, burnt as though by the sun. Your cries are sharp and thin as his fingers work you apart, legs splayed, hands clutching at anything in reach: him, the sheets, your bare breasts.

Soon, the tides change, and Joel pushes himself up, deftly maneuvering so that he’s kneeling on the floor, pulling you to the edge of the bed, all while keeping his fingers inside you. Propped up on your elbows, you gaze down at him between your legs, chest heaving as you realize what will come next.

But your underwear is still devastatingly on, and his mouth is miles and miles away from your center. His lips are on the inside of your leg, yes, but only at your knee. Still, you cannot complain–his fingers have started moving again, and this time, his thumb rubs at your bud.

“Joel,” you breathe, tipping your head back. “I’m gonna die waiting. I’m–I’m…please, my underwear.”

There’s a little spark of surprise as he immediately rips them off you, but you let out a thin wail when he pulls his hand away, leaving you cold and empty. Your arms shoot out to reach for him, but he eases you back with a hand on your stomach, draping your legs over his shoulders.

“Shh, baby,” he soothes, breath sweeping across the sensitive skin. “You’re so good for me. It’ll be worth it.”

“Please,” you whimper as he brushes soft kisses on the inside of your thigh, trailing down closer and closer until he finally presses one right onto–

His name falls like fluttering leaves from your lips as his tongue licks up through your folds. There is no easing into it this time; he eats at you like your body is something exquisite. Lips capture your bud as his tongue flicks over it, and you dissolve into a thousand flower petals as you sink into the bed.

“Joel, please, I need your–” Your moan is loud and throaty as his hand snakes between your legs, and he plunges his fingers into you, immediately curling them, all before you can even finish your sentence.

And this will do it. You know it will. The release is already coiling up in your stomach, heavy and tight, and you think maybe you’ll faint before you can get there. That’s how perfectly he works you. That’s how skilled his tongue is, how steady his fingers are in their movement. It’s like he had spent years studying your body, countless nights giving you this divine pleasure.

But you’ve just met him. You can’t explain this, and you’re not meant to.

You forget the thought as the warmth pools in the depths of your core, as one of his hands squeezes your thigh so tightly that it aches. There’s a sound coming from deep in his throat; if you could, you would pull it from him and cup it in your palms. His tongue is ceaseless, and his fingers are tapping against the spot inside you that sends your sense scattering.

“I’m almost there, I’m almost there, Joel,” you gasp, clenching down on him, drawing your thighs tighter around his head. He can’t go anywhere. He can’t stop. You need this. You’ll die without it. You’ll–you’ll–you’ll– “Fuck.”

The release envelopes you like an avalanche, pinning you down so that all you can do is arch your back into his mouth. You can hear his low groan amid your rapture, but you are otherwise so lost, so gone. You are meant for this. This is how you should always live. If it was forever like this, you could make it. His mouth, his fingers, him. Yes. Just like this.

It ends so soon. But your woe is interrupted by the simple sight of Joel, lips wet and glistening from you, shaped into a sloppy smile. He’s stroking the outside of your thigh as he untangles himself from your legs. Then he rises and crawls over you, kisses you soft and gentle, letting you taste the tang of yourself. The wetness of the fingers that were inside you trace against your jaw, leaving it cool in the air.

“You’re so good for me, baby,” Joel murmurs into your hair, holding you closer to him. “So fucking sweet.”

You sigh contentedly into his chest, but you’re still buzzing, still yearning for more of him in different ways. It’s almost without thought when you reach between your bodies and slip your hand into his jeans. He’s already almost hard in his boxers, and as you trace his length, you bite your lip at just how much there is.

He groans, low and quiet, against your neck, pushing himself more into your hand. “Ah, fuck, baby. You don’t–” he swallows. “--you don’t have to.”

“And I’m not going to,” you say. And it’s true: that was never in the plan. It’ll be a while before you let him into your mouth. You’ve never liked doing it, only would if you loved him. “But you are still gonna fuck me, right?”

He chuckles lowly. “That even a question, darlin’?”

“Good. Then, these–” you withdraw your hand to pop the button on his jeans, yank down the zipper “--need to come off. Right now.”

He instantly sits up, tosses you a cocky grin. “Yes, ma’am. Anythin’ you want.”

You sit up to watch him as he gets on his feet to do what you ask. But, god, he still has the reins in this moment. You know this as he takes his sweet time pulling them down, letting you soak in his body for the first time.

And fuck, how had you not noticed all this?

All the delicious muscles in his torso were built by hard labor, not at the gym, but still with a leanness–long lines, not bulk. His arms could lift you like you’re nothing. The expanse of his shoulders could eclipse you underneath him. But his jeans are hanging low on his hips, and your eyes drop immediately to the v-lines now exposed, to the wisps of dark, coarse hair peeking over his briefs.

“You’re teasing me,” you accuse.

He raises an eyebrow. “Tellin’ me you don’t enjoy the show?”

“I do. I just–god, I need–” You’re stammering. You’re gesturing frantically with your hands. “Fuck, Joel, I need you. I can’t fucking stand how–how sexy you are.”

The rich sound of his laugh is at home in the flickering candlelight, but he finally lets the jeans drop to his ankles, standing there in only his tight briefs. Your chest is clenching with stifled pants as he returns to the bed, climbing over you until all you can do is flatten down onto the mattress, caged by his arms and legs.

“I…think…you forgot something,” you whisper as his lips dip down to your neck.

“Did I?” he murmurs between kisses. “Maybe you should fix it for me, hm?”

You exhale a trembling breath as your hands find his hips, a breath that he captures with his mouth on yours. You manage to get his briefs down somewhat but can only move so much with him over you, with his hand cradling the back of your head. At your frustrated squeak, Joel reaches around and takes them the rest of the way off.

Finally, finally.

But he curses under his breath and pulls away. Your heart feels like it’s sunken into a hole in the ground as you stare back at him. The absence of him kills you. “I don’t have anythin’ with me,” he admits, looking like he could punch himself. “I can’t believe I didn’t fuckin’ remember.”

“You mean, like, a condom?”

“Yeah.” He rubs a hand over his face. “Might have one in my truck, but this isn’t–this isn’t somethin’ I usually do. And everything’s probably closed now and–”

“Joel.”

He quiets, brings his eyes to yours.

“I don’t mind,” you tell him, sitting up. “I don’t really do this either, so I’m clean, and you can just pull out. I…trust you.” You say that last part so quietly. You can’t meet his gaze now.

“I don’t want this to be a mistake,” he says softly.

“I’ve made so many mistakes, Joel. You’d be the least of them,” you say. “I think you’re a decent man.”

“You just met me. How can you be so sure? I coulda, I dunno, killed a bunch of people or somethin’. Just because I’m decent to you don’t mean–”

“Have you killed a bunch of people?”

“Well, no, but–”

You tilt your head, cock a smile. “You’re acting like a dad. Cut that shit out, and please, just please fuck me, Joel.”

He exhales, his shoulders relax, and the easy smile slides back onto his face. “Yes, ma’am. Anything.”

You don’t wait before pulling him to you by the neck, smashing your lips to his. And he’s quick to push you down to the bed, hand behind your back, you arching over it. Your lips never separate. You’ll die if they ever do. He’s roughly palming your breast, licking into your mouth, hot and hungry, desperate and keen. And then, his hand leaves your chest for a moment, finds its way to where your bodies will meet. You tense, knowing what’s coming, and when he eases himself in, your moan shatters into his mouth. The start of his slow, deep thrusts has your eyes rolling back, has you clutching him closer by his shoulders, tossing your head so his teeth scrape your chin.

“Yes, yes. God, Joel, t-thank you,” you gasp.

He lets out another of his low growls before he grabs your head back to kiss you again, quickening his motion as he does. In this way, he continues until your body and your mind belong entirely to him. Every movement you make is to bend with him, to let Joel mold you into something perfect for him, to bear his roughness and welcome his gentleness.

It’s how he holds your jaw between his fingers to keep you still, but how achingly tender are the kisses that come after. How he hooks your leg under his elbow, folding you into yourself almost painfully, but how attuned to every twitch of your body, every time you react–tempering himself at a wince, going deeper when he earns a moan.

And your every thought belongs to him, too. Every time you catch a glimpse of his dark eyes, the tendons in his neck, the expanse of his shoulders, your world shrinks until it’s taken his shape. And then, before long, it’s just him, and him, and him.

It’s how he’s looking at you, too, like you’re the woman who filled his lungs with the breath he’s used to make all his beautiful sounds. Every fervent moan, every sweet little nothing he’s poured into your mouth, next to your ear. All because of your shaky hands that coaxed him into being.

“Baby, I’m gonna…I’m sorry, I have to–” Joel chokes out, bracing a hand next to your head.

His thrusts come rougher, but looser, like they’re out of his control now.

You reach up and let him lean his cheek into your palm. “Go ahead, sweetheart,” you breathe.

Not a moment later, he jerks out of you and spills onto your stomach, tugging at himself, groans hanging in the air. You’re stroking his cheek, admiring him in quiet awe, still so perfectly handsome even at his most animal. The prominent veins in his hands and arms, bowed head, face contorted in an unholy mask of ecstasy. Yes, probably, even more so.

When Joel finishes, he leans over to snatch his shirt up from the ground and uses it to wipe your stomach clean. He’s holding you as he does this–arm slid under your shoulders, lips pressed unmoving to your forehead. You’re still and stiff in his embrace; this isn’t what you expected. The shirt, maybe, sure. His tenderness? Never.

“Sorry, darlin’, usually’d have a towel for this,” Joel tells you, wadding the shirt into a ball–messy part inside, it’d seem–and tossing it back to the floor.

“You got your shirt dirty for me,” you say. “You didn’t have to.”

He chuckles. “Good thing I got more of ‘em in the truck.”

You extract yourself from him, springing awkwardly to your feet, still a little unsteady. It was nice, you have to admit. But you can’t let yourself linger with him. It’s not supposed to work like that. “Let me put it in the wash for you, anyway. You thirsty or anything?”

He’s sat up as though to follow you, a bewildered expression on his face. “I’m not worried about the shirt, darlin’.”

“Are you sure?”

“Never been more sure in my life.”

“Okay,” you say, a little deflated. Now, what do you do? You’re standing at the foot of your bed, wringing your hands. You can’t stay here all night, can you?

“You seem lost,” Joel says gently.

“I–” you start but can’t admit to it. “What now?”

He cracks a little smile, but it doesn’t seem at your expense. “Well, much as I’d love to stay up with you, I’m tired, and I’ve still got a long drive tomorrow.”

You nod. “Okay, you should get some sleep, then. You sure you don’t need anything?”

“I do need something, actually, yeah,” Joel says.

“Sure, what is it?”

“You in this bed with me.”

You freeze. Not what you expected. “Oh, um, okay. If you really want,” you say, but you’re still stationary.

Joel shakes his head. “Not want, need.” Then, he casts his eyes somewhere to the side and says so softly that it’s almost inaudible, “Please.”

Your exhale tumbles out, but you nod, going to your dresser to find a clean set of pajamas–little shorts, big t-shirt. You let him watch you dress from afar and then return to his side slowly, cautiously. Like you think he might pounce, claws out. Instead, he stays where he is but leans in to kiss your bare shoulder slipping from the shirt.

“Would you–?” you begin, passing him his discarded underwear.

“Sure, honey,” Joel murmurs, standing up to put them on. But before he returns to bed, he goes over and blows out the candle. The room is almost completely dark, and you’re still until you feel the mattress dip down next to you. That’s when you lean into him, pressing against him like a cat. “Sorry,” he says. “Shouldn’t leave that burning overnight.”

“Sometimes I do,” you admit.

“I’ll bet you do,” he answers, chuckling. “But don’t, alright?”

You yawn wide, the dark conjuring exhaustion into your bones. “Alright, Joel.”

He gives a sigh of defeat, then you feel him peel back the covers and slide under. When you look over, you see the length of his body in the soft shadows. He’s stretched out on his side, head propped in his hand. The space he leaves is perfect for you.

You need to fill that space. Just not with your body. “You want me to set an alarm or anything, or I could–”

“Darlin’.”

“Yeah?”

“Lie down with me.”

You quietly arrange yourself next to him: on your side facing him, a delicate river of space between your bodies. But he’s so warm. He radiates it. And it’s snowing outside like it’ll never stop, and your old farmhouse is so drafty, and the candle’s snuffed, and your pile of pillows is just not gonna cut it tonight. So, you bury your face into his chest, and he wraps his arms around to pull you closer, wraps you both in blankets.

His heartbeat thrums like the pulse of the earth, and you let yourself be lulled by it.

#well two months later and we're finally here #joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller fic #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #tlou fanfiction #my posts #my writing #sun & sky

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redheadspark · 2 years

Note

4 “I’ll protect you” 5 “I’ll keep you safe” with Azriel towards reader pls <3 luv ur writing

A/N: This is far too cute! Thank you for the request anon!

Be Level With Me

Summary: During a Sparring session with Azriel, you see the hesitance he has when it comes to the upcoming battle for the good of all fae and human. (Takes place during Wings and Ruin)

Warnings: Just some cute fluffy fluff

"Okay, Azriel. We need to stop,"

Azriel paused, you taking a step back and seeing him in a sheen of sweat and taking massive breaths. You were just out of breath yourself, the sparring session you were in the middle of with your mate was strenuous and intense. Not to mention it was a warm day out in Velaris, you two deciding to practice your hand to hand out at the townhouse in the back garden. Tension was already rising in the air with the notion of a major battle happening against King Hybern.

You were all ready, or you had to be ready for it

"What is it?" Azriel asked, placing his hands on his hips and watching the hesitant look you were giving him. You moved your hair to be in a ponytail and not have it stick to the back of your neck, the blistering sun on your back and the sweet smell of the flowers in Elain's garden was making your head spin, wondering what you were going to say to Azriel.

"You're distant," You stated, Azriel pausing and looking at you with a confused stare. When Azriel wanted to spar with you, you only assumed it was to brush up on your fighting skills for the battle that was going to come sooner than later. You were a decent fighter yourself, though you were more prone to have a task masker and a thinker than an actual soldier. But you still knew how to fight and kill, maybe not to the extent of your mate and Spymaster, but it was a skill you had.

Azriel has sparred with you in the past, you know knew how to throw out punches and dodge low kicks from one another so well you could do it with your eyes closed. But this session felt...off. Azriel's movements were a bit stiffer than usual, not swift and sleek like he would usually be. Even his hazel eyes that were bright in the sunlight seemed....out of place. And he was a hair late in blocking a punch or ducking from a glided kick to the leg.

His mind was occupied, and you had to know what was on his mind.

"You're mind is not here, not in tis sparring session." You explained some more as Azriel was watching you from a few feet away. He was seeing that you were concerned, it was etched on your face and within your skin as you went on, "Az, I wanna know what's going on in your head."

"It's....it's nothing for you to worry about," He reasoned, but you shook your head slowly as you walked over a bit more to get closer to him. Azriel was very hesitant in letting you in, fully letting you in, when it came to his thoughts and his emotions. Maybe he was used to having walls up around his mind and his heart most of his life, needing to keep a distance from having people close to him and people care for him. Yet he was so willing when you two got together, so willing to let you in and have you see all the jagged parts and damaged corners of his soul.

Even after 300 years of marriage and being mates, Azriel still surprised you.

"I have to worry because something's holding you back," You explained, seeing him slowly taking in long breaths and release that stiffness from the sparring session moments before, "I worry because you're my husband and your thoughts are important and valid. And I worry because you're my mate, and my bond with you is tell me that...you're worried,"

You felt it in your core, deep in your belly that he was worried about something. That a singular thought was haunting him and making his mind occupied and busy. You knew your mate very well, far too well for him to hide a lingering thought or feeling from you. Whether it was small and minor or something rather large and dangerous, you always wanted him to tell you.

Azriel could see you weren't backing down from this, and you weren't going to brush it under the rug. He sighed, his own shoulders were sagging now as you were watching him in silence, waiting for him to say what was truly bothering him and making him mentally so far away from you.

"it scares me, thinking of what could happen with this war," Azriel confessed to you, you still quiet as he took a long breath as he went on, "I've lost so many things in my life ever since I was a little boy and I had to learn how to live with it and go on."

You hated knowing that his past was damaged and tainted in pain and sadness. Hearing about his family, how he got those scars, and how he had to build up his own rough and hard exterior in order to survive. The tender heart under his skin was so gentle and unique, such a rare thing to see and be exposed to as you two were getting to now each other before you became mates.

"I know the risks going into this war, and those risks are very high. But....the one thing I'm afraid to risk loosing is you," Azriel confessed, your face looking at him in concern how as he seemed so saddened to tell you this. You immediately moved, getting chest to chest with him and placing your hands on his arms.

"Az.." You were about to say, but he cut you off.

"You are my life," He explained calmly, though you head the brokenness in his voice as his eyes were pouring into yours, "Ever since we bonded and became mates, I considered your life more important than mine. And I know you won't be anywhere near the battle field and you won't be in danger, but I'm still worried about you and making sure you're going to be safe,"

"Nothing going to happen to me," You reassured him carefully, squeezing his arms in your hands, "Azriel I promising you that I won't get harmed,"

"If something does happen or goes left out there with you, I'll protect you and make sure you don't leave this world," Azriel said, sounding determined like it was a vow as you felt the bonding tug give one good yank from his end, "I'll keep you safe, no matter what it takes,"

"Baby, take a breath and look at me," You said softly, having Azriel close his mouth as you searched his eyes. You saw it there in the flickers of his hazel orbs, the fear of you being hurt or killed and Azriel having no way to prevent it. You touched your forehead to his, feeling the sweat from his head melt along yours as you two were so close to one another and breathe each other in under the warm sun and the small gust of wind that cooled you down.

"I have no doubt you will always protect me and keep me safe," You reassured him calmly, "I would be a fool to think otherwise. But you cannot make this fear overtake you, Azriel. You are better than that, I know you are. It's going to be okay, and I am going to be safe."

He had to hear it from your mouth, to hear the certainty in your voice and see it in your eyes that you were going to be safe and you weren't going to leave him. He's lost so many others in his life, and you knew deep down it petrified him that you could be lost too. You've heard plenty of stories of one mate dying and the other going insane from the bond breaking and the loss of their mate. In the back of your mind, there had to have been a linger thought that it could happen to you and Azriel with this battle, this war. But you couldn't give it life, not when Azriel was thinking the same thing.

"I'm not going to leave you, you understand me?" You asked him in a whisper, feeling him nod his head against yours as you spoke again, "You and I will survive this fight and nothing will stop us, okay?"

Azriel said nothing but hugged you, you hugging him back and kissing his head and cheeks as he kept him close to him. While the war was coming around the corner to shake up your world, you had no care for it.

Not when your world was in your arms.

The End.

#azriel shadowsinger #azriel x reader #azriel #azriel x y/n #azriel x you #azriel x oc #acomaf fanfiction #acotar fandom #azriel acotar #acotar fanfiction #acotar

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the-geek-librarian · 5 months

Note

12, 15 and 25 for Vanica, Dante and Zenon :D

HELLL YEAHHHHH THE BITCHES LETS GOOO. HI CY :DDD

12. What's a Headcanon you have for this character?

Dante: He can't cook for SHIT. like as much as I love him (which is more then I will ever openly admit) bro can't make a sandwich or boil and egg so Vanica runs him out the kitchen with a wooden spoon. Also he can't drink. Homie is a lightweight and he hates that so much

Zenon: He really likes dancing! Though no one (except Allen) knows about it. Not even Vani and Dante. Plus he has a REALLY big sweet tooth, if their is a box of sweets in his field of vision he will leave nothing for the rest the siblings (this annoys Dante beyond belief )

Vanica: She is (somehow) a really great cook! She kicked Lucius out of cooking duty a month after she learned the basics. Dante has made the "Haha, your a woman and you cook" joke only once in his whole life because Vanica put rat poison in his food and uhhh it wasn't a nice experience. And she can sing too! Most of the time she acts like she can't just to annoy ppl

15. What's your favorite ship with this character? ( Doesn't matter if it's canon or not)

Dante: OHHHHHH BOYYYY UHHH. Sweet rat man, I love you (regrettably) but your ass is so fucking bitchless. The closest thing he has to a relationship is the fact that he is fuckbuddys with Lucifero, I won't count Yami x Dante as a ship bc it's literally just rat man being a weird ass mother fucker and getting his ass beat which is funny as shit. However I will say he is pansexual and he will get into a relationship with literally anything and anyone.

Zenon: There is only one correct answer. Allen x Zenon for LIFE. Because come on BC fandom that man is not attached to Wemon in any way, only thing he feels for them is fear bc of Vanica and his Mom. But moving on they are soulmate-coded and I will die on that, Golden retriever bf and Black cat bf

Vanica: Listen, all of Vanica ships are fucking soulmate coded ok??? (I'm dilulu shut UP) and I love them with my heart (except Vanica x Acier, not soulmate-coded but annoying cat x Tired mother of 4). I have three I would die for bc I am insane. 1) Vanica x Megicula and Vanica x Lolopechka really they give off SUCH old married couple energy I wanna DIE. 2) Vanica x Lolo x Gajah, it's the "We can fix her" mentality AND THEY SECSIDED THE MOTHER FUCKERS. They are very funny and funky but not everyone's cup of tea but it's ok.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?

Dante: My first impression was "OHHHH, he looks cool! (I also like the beard shot me) wonder what he can do" and now it's "Cring ass motherfucker pls stop being weird for the love of god (affectionately, I'm afraid), can you not have beef with an 18 year old?". Can you tell that I like him but wanna throw him of a clif?

Zenon: First impression "Emo boy, with a sad backstory incoming" I didn't care about bonehead at the start, I thought he had BANING magic but beyond that meh. And now "UHHH BABY BOY LIL WET CAT MAN BONE ASS IDIOT. can someone get this mans husband pls?" now I put him in my pocket and take him as far for house Zogratis as I can

Vanica: First impression "WEEEEEEE WEMON, IF HOT WHY EVIL???" I was uhh it was love at first sight honestly, same with Lolopechka so now I call them BOTH baby girls. Now "Oh baby- I would feel bad for what I put you through BUT I DONT SUFFER, then I wack her with the angst stick in almost all my Aus" really can you get more baby girl then Vanica? ( yes you can but SHUT up) she is both insane and has her mental health hanging on a thread, she really needs some tits to lean on and a tea to drink.

Thank you for the asks Cr!!

Asks for this are always open for any fandom I'm in!!

#black clover #v answers #vanica zogratis #dante zogratis #zenon zogratis #The Zogratis siblings #Really #they all need therapy

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tiredgoodomensfan · 11 months

Text

GOS2 opening title analysis

spoilers ig?? idk

AAAAA S2 CONTENT YIPEEE

so, again, this is gonna be long, rambling, and will prolly make 0 sense so stick with me here I'm feeling a lot of feelings. im gonna go thru each thing in as much depth as possible so buckle up, this is gonna be like twice the size of my poster + hillywood dissection.

OK THE WAY CROWLEY LITERALLY CRAWLED UP FROM HELL TO MEET W AZ IS LIKE :((( and like on their way out from the tunnel thing I saw like a figure with wings?? I reckon it might be Micheal (the angel not the sheen) but I'm not 100% sure. whoever it is, they're holding a box or smth?? so do with that what you will idk

Im pretty convinced we might be getting Moses stuff, cuz the shining light at the top of the hill? seems like mt siani (sianai? idk) and the fact we haven't seen that type of light before and Moses is supposesdly the only person to have a direct face-to-face interaction with god makes me think we'll be getting stuff from that era (catholic upbringing coming in handy for knowing this stuff) ALTHOUGH, there are lots of animals, and they seem to be like in pairs as well?? so maybe more Noah and the arc? which like MAYBE ALL THE FANFICS ABT THEM COMFORATING EACH OTHER ON THE ARC WILL COME TRUE??? YIPEE!!

ok everything bursting into flames is a lil random but after a while of thinking, maybe sodom and gamora? (idk how to spell that either) which like, MORE SANDALPHON?? Don't get me wrong, hate the guy, he's awful and creepy, but he's SUCH a good villain. the actor doesn't get enough props online for how well he plays him. sandalphon had like 3, maybe 4 mins of screen time in s1? and from that, he's become one of the most HATED characters in the entire fandom. That is just like, wow, well done, I hate the character you play, but that's because your acting is amazing. ANYWAYS, sodom and gamora. aziraphales gonna be having some *feelings* about that, because why would heaven hurt all those people? even if they were sinners? similar to noahs arc situation with Crowley giving the most comfort this time <3

WOOOO GOTHIC SHIT!! the pickled herring cart makes a return and it is as confusing as ever. they're in a graveyard, so that's fun times. maybe more hell? cuz that's where they met up when the antichrist got delivered. anyways, does anyone know the period this is meant to be in? it's gone out of my head. anyways, I tried looking up pickled herring carts to see if they had any significance thru history but na. like they were there, and popular, but no, no huge significance. ALSO, in the graveyard, they go past a gravestone with 'every day' written on it??? girl wtf does that mean?? the running theories I have so far are that it's either like, the death of the everyday, meaning that what they used to do (hate each other??) isnt.. happening anymore?? idk?? or that it's just Neil being edgy and emo. my bets on the latter (love u mr. gaiman <3) ALSO ALSO OH MY FUCKING GOD?? Another one of the gravestones says JANE AUSTEN ON IT!! ARE WE GETTING JANE AUSTEN CONTENT??? OMFG??? YIPPEE!! maybe we'll get to see where az gets some of his first editions from :D aslo rq, religious imagery in the background, an angel carrying a cross, more heaven looming over Az?? ALSO HOLY SHIT?? I just accidentally paused it at onde of the graves and i swear it says 'here lies *insert another couple words here* BEELZEBUB?? HUHHH?? is that gonna be the explination for beelzebubs new corparation?? but that wouldnt make any sense?? idk atp but that gravestone DEFFIENTLY SAYS BEELZEBUB

(if you think this is long pls know we're 22 seconds into a 1:44 video, i want lying when I said this was gonna be BEEFY)

SO. HELL. WOOO!! more hell content which could go one of three ways. either we get more goofy Crowley giving more presentations, CAN I GET A WAHOO?? or we get him being given more assignments and we get more of an idea of the whole structure of hell, uncomfortableness but nothing horrendous. OR ALL THE ANGST FICS COME TRUE AND WE SEE CROLWEY GETTING BEAT INTO A PULP BY HIS SUPERIORS!!! maybe all three! can't wait to see :D but as much as my angst-craving self would love to see the last one, I think the reality is it's gonna be the first two. it looks like there's a desk and office chairs, so we'll probably be getting scenes that are like the equivalent to what we see of aziraphale and the archangels in s1

so we already knew we were getting more ww2 scenes but.. MORE WW2 SCENES WAHOO!! maybe we're getting post-church scenes? tender love confessions in the back of the Bentley? or maybe angst? maybe edosian orchids 901s (I LOVE THEM SM) fic about Crowley having a breakdown after being forced to report on the horrors of war will come true? or maybe one of them has to conscript cuz... idk dude just cuz. The bomber plane makes me think of the blitz so maybe Crowley is comforting Azi while they hide from the bombs in the shop? whatever happens, ill love it :D

a quick google told me fuck all about the ladies of camelot, just that theyre often overshadowed by the guys. WHICH LIKE WTF?? anyways, apparently its like king arthur times, so maybe we see the arrangement being born?? YIPEE. other then that, they seem to be like a dance group? so like, idk? could be suppourting acts maybe? could the merlin fandom help with this maybe? whats goin on with the ladies of Camelot my dudes.

MAGIC AZIRAPHLE MAGIC AZIRPAHLE MAIGIC AHVDSAKJ YAY!! I love the idea of aziraphale pulling a snake from his hat as part of the act and Crowley pretending to be pissed but internally freaking the fuck out because 'HOLY SHIT HES HOLDING ME HES HOLDING ME HES SO SOFT WHAT THE FUCK'

I HAVE. SO MANY. THOUGHTS. ON. SPACE. SO, SO HEAR ME OUT RIGHT, SO, the only time space has been mentioned really is when Crowley was talking abt how he made certain planets and the Alpha Centauri stuff. SO MAYBE WE'LL BE GETTING SOME PRE-FALL CROWLEY?? cuz like, the only thing close to space is heaven, but that's meant to be transcendent, and by definition exists outside of space and time. SO THEREFORE, PRE-FALL CROWLEY?? PLEASE?? NEIL IM BEGGING, IM ON MY KNEES, PLEASE!!

the... the hearts.. the love hearts.. the.. the hearts falling from the sky when they.. when the.. when... DNCBKHFVYEWIQUKLDWHJNX I'm feeling such normal feelings rn haha. anyways they're in love and :D the way they're sat on the roof together as well? like aw :( the jukebox and the vinyls (are those vinyls?) make me think more 60's content? and the Bentley as well? friendly reminder that Crowley goes too fast for him!! maybe we'll see him drinking himself into oblivion after he gets brutally rejected by Az :D oo or maybe him contemplating offing himself with the holy water! or maybe more lighthearted stuff, like the discovery of the queen curse :)

(also OO ninas shop!)

the lifts make me think more heaven content, which we knew was happening anyway but I'm thinking more Az giving reports and getting verbally abused and humiliated :D also, the steam makes me think industrial revolution for some reason? idk tho

THE ARRIVAL. is that the title for ep 1? Probably. but on the posters there's like a locked box? (getting fnaf 4 flashbacks) i've no clue what that means, like at all. but its prolly smth!

and thats it! this will probably be updated and edited, but these are all my thoughts as of the day it was released.

if you read this, there must be smth wrong with you mentally, but me too, me too. give me any thoughts you might have, ill be really interested to hear them! (these guys have consumed my brain)

friendly reminder that it'll be quiet, gentle, and romantic. and they like holding hands!

#good omens #aziracrow #ineffable hubands #aziraphale #crowley #david tennant #micheal sheen #im going insane #haha im a bit obsessed

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taylorkellyreporting · 1 year

Text

i hope no one minds if i liveblog this bitch: ted lasso from 2x02 to 2x05

jamie’s such an asshole 😭

“…oh.” skfjgjvjfjs

the sad music playing in this jamie scene is taking me out

i hate jane, beard deserves so much better

maybe frank sinatra was the problem

nate and his asshole attitude is getting really old

“why’s it smell like my nana’s house in here?” i don’t know why but the line delivery is sending me

“you ain’t even speaking spanish” CACKLING

“evidently she doesn’t eat sugar” “what a fucking asshole” 😭😭

the littles being absolutely thrilled when roy swears is so funny

we all have our kinks i guess skfjgkvkns

“when it sucks and i hate it, i’m gonna hire a bunch of children to follow you around and scream ‘told you so, told you so.’ for centuries” “i look forward to the attention” i love keeley 😭

“old people are so wise. they’re like tall yodas” WHATKGKFJFJS

dani finding it funny that ted and jamie look like they’re sitting in the guys hand while everyone else is upset is so on brand 😭

jamie better get on his hands and knees and beg sam to forgive him, that’s all i know.

sam is so precious, i freaking love him

higgins keeps showing up in the most random places 😭 someone get that man an office

nate talking about how jamie being back would ruin morale by belittling everyone then having him immediately doing it to will was such a smart move

ted got through to dr fieldstone 🥹 i knew she’d grow to love him eventually

oh shit, this is gonna be a disaster

- 2x03

sassy!! i’m so glad she’s back

“you finished on my-“ YELLING

“did he talk like that-“ “the whole time. and so eager to please. it was fabulous.” 😭

genuinely forgot about their hookup til now

“uncle roy, can we have ice cream for dinner?” “no, that’s dumb” “you’re right, thank you for helping me set boundaries” pls

“wow, she really loves you” “i know, it’s fucking annoying” 😭

i really hope we see more of rebecca and nora’s relationship, i’m loving it so far

nora being a sam girlie is so real of her

what the fuck did i just witness?!76(;;$(85&

“charles edgar cheeserton the 3rd” wake up babe new chuck e. cheese name just dropped

“sincerely, boss ass bitch” this whole scene has me in tears

“jamie tartt is a muppet and i hope he dies of the incurable disease of being a little bitch” that’s actually a really good insult 😭

so proud of sam!!

that entire scene with the tape was so powerful

IT’S ABOUT SUPPORTING YOUR TEAMMATES EVEN IF IT MAKES OTHERS UNCOMFORTABLE!!!!!

THEY’RE A FAMILY 🥹

- 2x04

colin and moe aww

i’m not gonna lie, this look is really doing it for me

did jamie just bless HIMSELF??? 😭😭

keeley sticking her tongue straight into the chocolate fountain was sooo me coded

God, it’s me again-

a mini dartboard 🥹 henry is so precious

ted is all alone :(

“i think you might be dying” FUCKFKGJFJDJS

“i brought friend chicken!” “is that a christmas tradition in holland?” “no :D” 😭

“i just walked into your neighbors house! oh my God” idk why but this ep is making me lose it

“let’s get drunk!” pls he sounds so happy

rebecca’s look of disbelief at ted being called a wanker dkfjgjgjs

that nerf scene I’M CRYING

“mom! there are two white people at the door and they’re smiling!” BYE

the guy wanting a selfie with keeley instead of roy skfjfjsdjgkd REAL 😭

PLEASE

losing it at dani and mrs higgins drinking together, they looked so happy skdjgjvkd

ted and rebecca spending christmas together and delivering presents to kids 🥹

“you want me to drive?” “the…steering wheel is on the other side” “right, i’m the one with the accent here” 😭

NOT THE LOVE ACTUALLY REENACTMENT

THIS IS SO SWEET

i love rebecca’s voice so much

this was such definitely my fave ep so far and i desperately need a holiday episode every season

- 2x05

ted laughing when nate said he’d talk to isaac was fucked up but so funny

“so can i like give this back to you and you give me cash? is that a thing or…?” “no.” lmfao

“i don’t drink coffe, my mother says i was born caffeinated” she’s not wrong 😭

nate is taking hit after hit this episode and i can’t even feel bad for him after how he’s treated will

God, i love the way higgins talks about julie 🥹

alright, who wrote ‘yum’ on roys picture? cause i know it wasn’t him lmao

i don’t care if it was just brett almost breaking character, i’m gonna believe that there was a slight smile on roys face cause he was happy to see ted

“you’d look well fit with pigtails” “i do 😁” petition for rebecca to wear pigtails at least once before the show ends…for science.

roy asking ted if he did alright with coaching isaac is something that can be so personal

isaac stopping in the middle of the game to tie that girls shoe just made me love him more

roys reluctant friendship with ted is everything

when harry met sally 😭

every time i believe i can’t love roy more than i already do he goes and proves me wrong

roy seeing the impact he had on isaac 🥹

HIGGINS AND JULIA ARE SO CUTE

keeley looks so proud of roy aw

don’t know if i’ve said this before but isaac has such a beautiful smile

“shut up. just shut up. you had me at ‘coach’” and if i said this is the funniest show on television?

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bettsfic · 2 years

Note

i know in the past you've made "fix-it" scenario posts where you write out how you would've wanted a certain story to go (like the star wars sequel trilogy) and they are always so brilliant and fun and so much better than anything boring men in the writer's room came up with. in your ideal world, how could stranger things s4 plot have gone if/how chrissy survived? (i'm looking at this through my grubby lil hellcheer glasses) (pls don't feel obligated to answer! only if you have time ofc.)

very cool question!

(stranger things s4 spoilers ahead)

this got long, so i'm putting it under a cut.

so when i've written fixit things in the past, it's usually pretty easy because the writing is so sloppy and the character motivations are flat and uninteresting. so really all i do is tidy the story up and give the characters a touch more nuance.

the problem with stranger things is that it's working in the total opposite direction. it's too tidy. in fact after i got this ask i thought about it for a good half an hour and every single time i moved or changed a piece of plot, it had major repercussions for the rest of the plot. the s4 plot was woven so well that at the end i was like, there's no way i'd ever be able to write something as tightly woven as this. i lack the skill for it definitely but i also lack the interest. big plotty plots with many characters reacting to outright, unquestionable evil is just not my aesthetic wheelhouse.

which is all to say, there's nothing to really fix, exactly. i think eddie and chrissy are a huge missed opportunity, but i don't think chrissy dying is bad writing. (eddie's death was some of the weakest writing in the whole show imo [because he could have lived, like the plot did not force him to die, it just decided to, and i think there's a big difference], but the duffer brothers keep writing themselves into a corner where they make these phenomenal one-shot characters and can't keep them because there are already too many characters.)

so i think what we'd have to do is go back to season 3 and have billy live so he can stick around for the repercussions of his actions to be addressed in season 4. i really liked billy conceptually (and dear god dacre montgomery is hot) but ofc they made him a racist and so i just couldn't give a fuck about him. let's say they didn't do that and billy is still fucking awful but redeemable. (also while we're rewriting season 3, let's also say he boned mike's mom.)

billy is alive for season 4, and so max's plot would involve billy somehow so she doesn't get cursed. possibly redemption arc? we just need max out of the cursed ptsd kid fodder lineup. (by the way, that is my least favorite trope of all time. curse/monster attacks kids with ptsd only. like i watch stories like that and i'm like, yeah that'd be me. i'd be dead.)

we now have a totally unnecessary E plot in addition to plots A through D. but we're not bound by the physical constraint of production, so it's fine. i don't know what exactly would go in E plot except billy, max, and lucas feeling their feelings. which honestly i would be okay with.

that frees up max's story in plot B to go to chrissy. so she's not as far along in her vecna symptoms as the others yet but still having enough trouble to reach out to eddie for some weed. (this is where things get tough because there are so many tiny threads to consider.) but let's just say nancy's friend, vecna victim #2 becomes vecna victim #1, and his death happens near/around/in eddie's trailer somehow, so that chrissy is implicated in the murder and they both have to go on the run.

jason's plot would then turn into finding chrissy, who is missing and presumed dead because he believes eddie is a murderer on a rampage, etc. so instead of avenging her death, he's just trying to find her. all of this to say, i need chrissy and eddie trapped in a boathouse together with nothing to do but talk and fall in love. and this fits aesthetically with the "opposites attract in states of extreme danger" trope that littered 80s action movies.

so chrissy is with eddie the whole time. they escape on the water together running from jason, because by this point chrissy has sided with eddie and knows that if she gives herself up, jason will harm/kill eddie for kidnapping her or whatever.

the guy, jason's friend, is vecna victim #2 and opens the gate to the upside down. now chrissy's plot is tied firmly into plot B and everything happens basically the same except chrissy is in the upside down with the rest of the big kids and we would get some gratuitous protective eddie. which i think would also lower the pressure on steve/nancy which, i mean, i love a good love triangle and i enjoyed that tension but it feels a little hamfisted to me.

meanwhile, in our newly forged plot E, billy has started to exhibit vecna symptoms. and we know he is Doomed, because there would be a scene where he hangs out with max and has a good time and maybe even smiles. but! we don't know how far along he is in comparison to chrissy, so we aren't sure who is next.

imagine: chrissy in the upside down, her cheerleading uniform all torn up and dirty. she has no idea how to fight but she is doing her best. she's lost that cute little sweater she has. eddie gives her his jacket.

here's where i a little bit lose track of things, but roughly what would happen is that plots B and E would merge so that the big kids + dustin and lucas could try to help billy, which would fail and billy would die. (listen i hate redeemed characters dying as much as anyone else, but this is about hellcheer so sacrifices must be made.)

that leaves chrissy and eddie to take over the final scenes that max and lucas have, and eddie can still get his big damn hero moment by fighting jason, which makes more sense than lucas fighting him anyway. there is no random bat protection setup, because that's stupid. i know we sacrifice eddie's guitar solo but let's say there's a scene in episode 1 where we get to see him play at the hideout or something to make up for it.

imagine: instead of max listening to kate bush (sorry kate bush), chrissy's song that helps her get away from vecna is eddie's demo tape or something. so she's just constantly listening to eddie's music because it makes her feel safe and eddie has to pretend he's not dying about it.

imagine also: earlier in the season we have a very tender moment between chrissy and eddie, and because she is a Sad Girl that's what becomes her happy memory when she's trying to get away from vecna, forcing her to realize that even through all this nonsense that this time with eddie has made her happier than anything else ever has. she is determined to live through this so they can be together.

eddie fights jason. chrissy's in vecnaland. plots A and B merge and eleven is fighting vecna. unfortunately this part gets really wobbly because eleven and chrissy have no connection to one another. let's just ignore that because we're not even really addressing plot A here.

let's say this is either the final season or we don't know if there will be a season 5, and therefore things have to wrap up rather than escalate, which means when vecna goes to give the final blow, eleven does her thing a little earlier, preventing chrissy from having all her bones broken and dying for a minute to open the gate. let's say also that vecna is dead and not tease that he's coming back next season, so that the resolution is firmer.

chrissy falls from where she's levitating a few feet off the ground. eddie has knocked out jason or something and he goes to chrissy, holds her, there's crying, there's some cheesy line that joseph quinn somehow fucking nails about how they could have had something real.

and then! chrissy wakes up! she says something romantic and vulnerable. eddie spouts a cheesy one-liner callback to something said earlier to lighten the tension. joseph quinn also nails this because he understands the assignment. they kiss! plots A through E resolve in some way i am not going to bother thinking about.

hellcheer resolution: chrissy is in the hospital. eddie is playing an acoustic guitar. chrissy brings up the tough question: what's he doing after graduation? eddie, who still can't believe he's dating chrissy cunningham: basically nothing. maybe go on tour eventually. maybe record an album. chrissy admits she doesn't really have any plans. no decisions are made, but in the silence they both kind of realize nothing is stopping them from being together. eddie brings up jason. chrissy says her relationship with him is no longer an issue. everyone comes to visit chrissy, because they're all friends now.

tiny epilogue: chrissy and eddie (and the other big kids) at graduation. cute 80s montage set to rock music of all of them getting their diplomas. we see chrissy and eddie making out because they are now That Couple and everyone is already exhausted about it. happily ever after! the end.

bonus epilogue that provides the music for the credits, which are rolling on the right side of the screen: chrissy goes to see eddie play at the hideout.

i know this is a mess but like i said, i am no good at balancing multiple plotlines. or any plotlines, really. and i know i forgot a bunch of stuff because honestly i was playing a game on my phone while watching season 4. i'm not even going to reread this because i'll want to add to it, so. this is the best i can do.

#my fic #do i have a tag for my fixits?#st4 #fixit

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many-gay-magpies · 2 years

Note

okay as much as i would Love to answer your whole post in detail and address the whole thing i can’t put a read more in my ask so i’m gonna limit it some 😭 would dms be more efficient? yes. am i writing this ask anyway? also yes.

and yeah i meant the Whole cb WHAT ARE THEY FEEDING THEM?? HOW LONG DID SUNGHOON HIT THE GYM FOR?? I DIDNT KNOW JAY’S VOICE COULD D O THE THINGS ITS DOING RN. NIKI IS OUT HERE LIVING HIS BEST ANGSTY TEEN LIFE.

“he’s selectively deaf” JDKSJDEB. no but fr i really do see jaan as a rigid, stubborn type, a stickler for rules when he’s the one making them but an absolute loose cannon whenever given an order. thankfully his “i do what i want” attitude doesn’t cause Massive problems bc he has a sense of responsibility and at least one braincell. jino, on the other hand… we’re just glad he’s cheerful and not particularly rebellious

CRAZY CAT VAMPIRES!! going back to noa with cat-like tendencies i imagine him padding around with a cat held in one arm “as a buddy” and everyone like “how has that thing not cleared you to death.” no but the guys having these old people tendencies is so funny to me it’s like a steve rogers situation where every once in a while it hits that “oh . oh right you may look like me but you’re Old” just heli smiling contentedly whenever he understands a pop culture reference or jaan crocheting (which is an even Better image now that i talked abt him up there) or jino learning to out-bake anyone’s grandmother (of course, being able to use his body as an oven helps)

no yeah . yeah sooha wanting to show them how to enjoy life as teenagers and then having to realize she couldn’t have a normal fun teenage life either and all of them working through it together and now i’m crying

i appreciate the chart and stuff bc there’s just So many ways to interpret vampirism and lycanthropy- disease, hereditary, extreme states of being (life or death), and each of them have so many implications and it’s fun to explore!! i wish we knew more abt solon and the guys’ origin UGH

- vrvr anon

man i always forget the limitations of this form of communication <///3 HSJFBVJV im just thankful tumblr apparently got rid of that word/character limit that they had on their asks for a while at least im assuming they did. that would have made our entire thing far less convenient

NO YEAH THE COMEBACK. HA. WOW. jay's voice DEFINITELY does a thing at the beginning of future perfect and i do NOT know how to feel about it. hybe needs to close the gyms fr because how much more ripped is sunghoon gonna GET. and yes u go riki get in your angsty edgy teen phase!!

jaan gives me chaotic lawful energy honestly—he's made his own set of rules and he sticks to them to the letter, but anyone ELSE'S rules? its fair game. jaan and jino both have the potential to be absolutely insane loose cannons (and sometimes ARE if the situation calls for it) but theyre stopped from being complete harbingers of chaos by the fact that jaan is actually oretty rigid and responsible (in his own strange way) and jino is happy-go-lucky cheerful instead of aggressively rebellious. if those two aspects of their personalities did not exist the world would be screwed.

NOA CARRYING A CAT AROUND "AS A BUDDY" PLS I CANT. THATS TOO SWEET. and maybe because hes tall af he can carry several more cats than his brothers and hes always just like (while holding six cats) "its the benefit of having long arms"

ive never watched a marvel movie of my own volition but i got weirdly involved in the fandom for some reason a couple years ago and because of that i Know Some Stuff. so now im thinking about heli being the ULTIMATE out-of-touch grandpa of the brothers, because hes the one out of all of them thats the most focused on protecting them and making sure they stay hidden, so hes never taken the TIME to get involved with the pop-culture of the time. and then when he actually starts to slow down a little and give himself time to LIVE instead of survive (thanks to sooha), and he starts looking into pop-culture more, he gets ABSURDLY PROUD anytime someone (like shion, because you KNOW shion would be the brother thats absurdly invested in everything pop-culture just because he thinks these modern humans are very entertaining) makes a reference to a meme or movie or something and he actually gets it! so like you said hes just sitting or standing there with this big old content grin on his face and he goes "i understood that reference!" and sooha or jino pat him on the shoulder like "yes u did good job heli" LMAO

"oh . oh right you may look like me but youre Old." KSGFJFBFJ EXACTLY and this could be said by either sooha (who even though she WAS born at the same time as them in our au, was conscious for significantly less of it) or OTHER students, in a hypothetical world where the brothers get less terrified for their lives, sooha makes more friends, and heli admits it wouldnt hurt to have a FEW more harmless teenagers in on the secret as long as they're harmless teenagers sooha trusts. which also brings to mind a situation in which jino befriends sooha's friends, and he's nice to them and likes them and everything because he's jino, but then said friends introduce jino to their grandparents and its all off the wall from there. sooha's human friend just stares at jino happily baking cookies and gossiping with their grandma like "why are you better friends with my grandma than you are with me"

i dont have much more to say about sooha and the boys experiencing normal life as teenagers together so im just gonna agree that yeah i am also crying. a lot. i am crying a lot. although in the hypothetical world where more humans get let in on the secret, the guys and sooha would actually have some Normal Teenagers to teach them how Normal Teenager Life is lived—at which point they could all be like "huh. actually we like the weird way we were doing it, but thanks!"

im glad the chart and everything was appreciated!! yeah theres so many different possible interpretations and i HAVE so many thoughts about those different possible interpretations. and many different possible interpretations of my own as you saw HSJFBFJB. its just!!! theyre both so COOL conceptually and theres so much that can be done with them!!! i also wish we knew more abt the guys' origins because so far all we know in canon is "woke up in an orphanage with no prior memories, already possessing both vampirism and magical powers. created somehow???" which. is NOT a lot. pls hybe

and hey look at that! i managed to answer this the same day it came into my inbox! and i only saved it to my drafts ONCE! yay me

#asks #anon 📝#vrvr anon #dark moon universe #dark moon stuff #dark moon

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clamsjams · 2 months

Note

Hellooo :D here's my opinion on the Purgatory event. I am not an expert on game design, I don't know much at all, but I still want to try to analyze the event a bit. (If you do end up using this for the video pls keep me anonymous.)

Hopefully this makes sense lmao

Purgatory:

1.- Time

a) It lasted for way too long, it never gave anyone a chance to rest. Constant stress.

b) Changes being made constantly regarding the score = confusion, no one could properly adapt, no one knew what to do, it made strategizing a lot harder, it made pvp a lot harder.

c) The fact that they scheduled an event on Sunday and announced it barely the day before (late in the day) is nuts. QSMP has always had little activity during Sundays, they should know the ccs schedules, why the fuck would they put an event on such a day and with such short notice. The least they could have done is warn the streamers in advance, no need to tell them exactly what the event will be, but they could just let them know that they'll need to be available on Sunday.

Also, they should have warned the ccs about the entire event in general. Again, no need to explain details or give spoilers, but letting them know "hey, this event will last 2 weeks and it's going to be pretty intense, we need you to mentally prepare yourselves and also we'll have important event on X and Y days so we'll need anyone who can to show up" would have been better than just throwing them to the wolves like that.

2.- PVP

They seemed to want to focus on pvp rather than roleplay, however:

a) Cursed team is an aspect of roleplay that they introduced that actively made pvp/confrontation worse.

b) Mobs being too overpowered. Yes it's purgatory, but not everyone is a proficient minecraft player and struggling with mobs caused a lot of problems for people when the focus was meant to be on interpersonal conflict.

c) Their idea seemed to be an "anything is valid" event, but they didn't stick to it, which was for the best but the thing is that the rules should have been implemented since the beginning, wanting "anything" to be valid was always unrealistic. It is possible to have a strong competition whilst also having some rules to keep things fair.

d) They ended up focusing a lot on the quests/tasks/contracts instead of pvp, which defeats the purpose of having a pvp event. They should have chosen whether to focus mainly on pvp or on strategy and stuck to it, instead they tried to make both things equally relevant and it did not work at all.

e) Spawn protections were useless.

f) They bounty system sucked, revealing a players cords like that was only going to bring trouble, especially as often as it happened. They tried to fix it but it was not good enough and ended up removing the npc entirely. It could have worked if they just didn't give out the exact location of players, I saw many suggesting a compass that simply points in a direction and that would have probably been better (though it still could have led to bases being found but it gave people a lot more time to move and get far away before being found).

3.- Rewards

a) The event asked a lot of the streamers and the audience, yet it provided little reward for everything they did. For "winning" during the first week all Bolas got was that they didn't have to participate on Sunday's event and an "advantage" for the capture the flag event, which ended up being having an admin play on their team.

b) Winning Purgatory got them to rescue 1 egg. They couldn't even pick which egg. Also, they immediately after threw a nuclear bomb at them. We still don't even for certain what happened to Dapper.

And that's it. That's all they ever got for Purgatory.

c) They didn't even get any answers or clues re: the eye guy, the eggs, egg island, the feds, the black concrete, the supposed cursed team, ElQuackity.

They got nothing, they didn't even get the chance to fight their captor, or ElQ, who was working for the eye. Nothing.

This made the ending feel anti climatic despite the fact that a lot was happening and that it should have been a great deal for them to finally be done with Purgatory.

4.- Teams

a) One good thing was pairing people with others they don't usually have a chance to interact much with because it helps to develop friendships.

b) The problem was how they handled the inactive players.

Half of the original Bolas team never logged on for the event, not even once. They only had the numbers because the half that did join fully committed and logged on even on days when they usually wouldn't.

But that should not be the standard, people should be able to log on when they can/want, they are entitled to their off days or other projects/responsibilities, they all have a life outside of the qsmp and outside of purgatory. Plus, the fact that the event was designed to appeal to a small group of players (bc pvpers are definitely not the majority on the server) and because of how harsh the conditions were, then they discouraged people from wanting to participate. Cellbit almost fully quit on day 2. In fact, Bolas' consistency was due to the fact that they enjoyed losing their minds with their friends. It wasn't the event itself what motivated them, but rather their friendship and enjoyment of each other's company.

c) Ideally, you want people to play your game because they actually enjoy it. Or because the reward is worth it. In this case, neither occurred.

d) Struggling to get players online, or completely depending on the exact same group of people for the entire 2 weeks is exhausting and with the lack of reward is simply not worth putting up with. I completely understand any cc that is/was feeling burnt out due to purgatory.

hi kal! i know it’s been ages since i asked for this but im cleaning out my inbox now. since my qsmp hyperfixation is gone im most likely not gonna get around to doing this video but i still appreciate all the info that u and everyone else ended up sending me! i’m not deleting the asks and i’m giving them a special tag just in case i decide to come back to it one day. thanks again for ur thoughts

#qpurgatory #qpurgatory 2 #clampurgatory #asks #posts from the ocean

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hesbambi · 3 years

Text

svt as your boyfriend

requested ; requests open ( use inbox pls! )

warnings ( fluff )

☆ ⌒ ヽkim mingyu

as your boyfriend

you both are like in the puppy love & honey moon phase but with random petty fights thrown in the mix

there’s never really a time where you feel like he doesn’t love the shit out of you

is constantly trying to be around you and do things with you; involving you in his routines and practices

your guys' “thing” is probably going on dates

everyone sees you both going on different dates, especially restaurants

mingyu’s favorite date so far is probably going to a very pretty museum

although he really did like the art ( he really did, even went as far to buy a print from an artist he really enjoyed ) he just liked spending time with you

the museum has a beautiful garden in the back where mingyu had took photos of you; which he has on his phone and quite literally everywhere

the guys see you both constantly huddled up together being lovey-dovey, in which yes, they do make fun of hahahshwg

mingyu is full of love around you ;D

nicknames

꿀벌 / honey bee : such an ideal pet name for either of you. mingyu literally sticks to you like honey. though you can’t deny you're his little bee.

애기야 / babe : this is reserved for outside instances, can’t let people know about how cheesy you both are at home JSJHBJSKHJ

time stamp [ 10:37 am ]

“gyu hurry up, i’m freezing my tits off!”

“always so vulgar aren’t you?”

you roll your eyes at his question. you wouldn’t have to be so vulgar and needy around him if he didn’t have you waiting outside, early in the morning without a sweater to warm you up.

technically, you were freezing because of your forgetfulness and sheer laziness to go back up to the apartment and grab your sweater. “don’t roll your eyes at me bee. i’m being a very nice person today”

though in your defense, mingyu was. he had planned a surprise trip for you both. though it really wasn’t a surprise because he couldn’t keep a secret. a secret he wanted to tell you very badly about. the only downside to this trip was waking up at the crack of dawn and getting ready.

shuffling into the car, you buckle up and glance at mingyu. even this early in the morning the man beside you was as beautiful as ever. your daydream cut off short once you realize mingyu was staring right back at you.

“thank you”, you say while leaning towards his side, pecking his cheek. a smirk playing on his lips, face gleaming even more than before with your affection. giggling while going back to the spot of your seat, you lean onto the window. though a sudden realization hit you.

“mingyu turn back.”

“what? why?”

“my phone, i left my phone” glancing up to him, he swerves making a u-turn.

“you're going to turn me into a bad person y/n.”

tag list : @kpopluvr9908

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puckyess · 2 years

Note

Heyyyy could u do #149 with Ethan Edwards pls? Thank you!!

149. "I don't care what you do, just fuck me."

warnings: obviously due to the prompt there's mentions of sex, swearing, mentions of drinking

You should’ve known that when nolan said “small gathering” there would be nothing small about it. There were people everywhere, most of which, you were pretty sure not a soul who lived in the house actually knew. But it was one of the first warmer days and so basically anyone who was out would wander over.

You heard his laugh before you saw his face. It was loud and full and warmed you from the inside out. Then you saw its owner and he gave you a smile that could’ve fooled you into thinking he had been saving it just for you. You made him wait a little longer before actually going to say hello, only offering a smile and a wave before moving on. No matter where you went though you kept catching glimpses of him- in the kitchen, on the couch, on the way to the bathroom, the backyard, the porch- and every time he had that goofy grin on his face. He seemed to genuinely enjoy every conversation he was a part of, and every person he talked to. You were drawn to his puppy-like personality, no matter how hard you were trying to fight it off.

You’d never slept together, but there was definitely something there. The flirting was off the charts since the day nick had introduced you to his d partner. Flirty banter, frequent texts, some fleeting and not so fleeting touches. It was innocent enough and all in good fun. In truth, he was probably too young for you, but you both loved the attention from the other nonetheless.

He apparently grew tired of the little cat and mouse game and ventured out into the backyard where he had seen you playing cornhole with pasta, summers, and nick earlier. He puts his finger to his lips as a signal for the boys to keep their mouths shut as he sneaks up behind you, snaking an arm around your waist mid-toss. “Edwards!” you screech, trying to wiggle out of his grip, but he just flexes his arm some more, locking you in place. You watch as your beanbag falls short of the board, costing you the game winning point. “You messed me up!” you growl but it’s far from intimidating with your feet still dangling off the ground. “Put me down or i’ll-” his laugh interrupts your hollow threat, “or you’ll what?” he challenges, but he does set you on your feet, spinning you to face him. Your brain hadn’t gotten that far so you just stick your tongue out at him and try to bargain with the guys to let you have a redo, but they refuse. “You are a menace. I believe you owe me a drink now.” you inform him. He happily obliges and heads for the house, turning when he doesnt feel you trailing after him. He clearly had expected you to follow him to the kitchen, but you insist on staying outside and being served by him after the little stunt he pulled. He shakes his head, smirking at your stubbornness but follows your orders. “Dont go far and behave while im gone” he calls over his shoulder with a wink.

By the time he comes back, you’ve moved groups, chatting with the younger guys. You’re not sure whether it's the presence of guys around his age or the half empty cup in his hand, but his flirting game seems to have leveled up since sending him inside. He cant take his hands off of you and when they flit away for the briefest of seconds, his eyes take their place. His arm comes around your shoulders as he hands you your own cup and it stays there until it falls lower and lower, sliding into your back pocket. You take a peek up at him and aside from the tiny smirk playing at the corner of his lips, he carries on his conversation with Dylan as usual. You dont mind the feeling of his hand or the message it sends. You let yourself lean a bit into his side, your arm coming around his waist, trying to follow the hot topic at hand. Your move catches ethan off guard, as hed been the more forward one so far tonight and he stumbles over his words multiple times even though you know there’s no possible way that he’s drunk after one cup. “What? One drink and you’re white girl wasted, Edwards?” you pinch his side, making him jump. Luke and mark share a look, hiding their smug grins as they lift their cups to their lips.

Ethan plays into it with a smirk, suddenly slurring his words. “S’not just one, babe, or maybe it is. What’s it matter, good excuse as any to do this” he says, taking your hand to twirl you around in a circle and straight into his broad chest. He stumbles for effect, sending you a grin and you roll your eyes but still lean into him with a smile on your face. Ethan loves the way you press into him and the smile that seemingly hasn’t left your face since he’s been glued to your side and he’d like to think he was part of the reason for that even if he had to act like a fool. And you love the way his goofy smile gets impossibly bigger too.

“Andddd, we’re out,” mark announces. The other two nodding in agreement.

“Be safe!” luke hollers.

“Use protection,” dylan adds before pulling a duker and scurrying away while you and ethan flip them all off.

“Now, where were we?” he asks, picking back up where he left off. He dances the two of you around dramatically, his arms around your waist and he was singing the wrong lyrics to just about every song. His words were mixed up and his movements didn’t match the beat but you couldn't care less. You were laughing, begging him to stop, not meaning it at all. you let him sway you around and you moved right along with him.

he’s barely paying attention to what’s actually playing, he just can’t get enough of those giggles that leave your lips as he spins you around. That is until WAP comes on and then it’s game over. Apparently it’s "his anthem" and he was still heated that bords had stolen the solo from him for mock rock, claiming seniority. “I swear i would’ve done it so much better,” he pouts. Your brain starts to do some thinking straight to the gutter and suddenly you must see what “better” looks like. “Well now’s your chance, E. Prove it, show me whatchya got.” That’s all the little encouragement he needs to get to work.

And boy does he put on a show for you. he does the dance oh so well, looking you dead in the eye as he practically dry humps the ground and you swear pathetically for a second that you’d give anything in that moment to be the one under him. And then just like that he’s off the ground, pressed up against your back saying the vulgar lyrics in your ear. his voice, twice as deep as it was earlier, his breath, hot against your skin. his mouth hovers so close to your neck you can just barely feel his lips and the way they smirk when his thumb that’s pressed against the pressure point of your wrist feels your pulse quicken.

The way you grab onto him when he pulls you close again makes his head spin. he’s out to impress tonight, insisting that tonight is finally the night he makes the move that he’s made in his head a million times over. you have the same goal in mind and he’s just taking it too damn slow so if you have to lean a little closer to finally feel his lips on you then so be it. “Fuck it” you think. You ‘accidentally’ lean closer to get him to press his lips against you and once he does he leaves a couple kisses before pulling back enough to look down at you with a smirk, “you did that on purpose.”

“So what if i did? whatcha gonna do about it?” you tease him back. you can see the gears turning, the ball in his court. “well, for starters...” he says, his tongue darting out to wet his lips and you can’t tear your eyes away.

He hesitates for a second, making you wait until you pout a little, “oh we’re pouting now?? I guess I need to fix that, huh?” He leans in, still slow as ever, but the kiss is great. Innocent to start until he presses closer, hands going down to grab your ass. You’re shocked at how forward he was, with how long it had taken him to build up to this, but given how the night had been going you shouldn’t have been surprised and who’s to complain?

You melt a little further into him, parting your lips to let him in, but fighting his tongue for dominance. The only thing that breaks you apart is the fact that someone shoves into your back. Ethan snaps out of it, breathless and ready to go after whoever just ran into you. You were a small person so it usually happened a lot and looked worse with how far someone could send you flying than it probably really was. Seeing you get shoved did not sit well with Ethan, but the person was gone so fast he couldn’t do anything about it. You laugh a little and grab his face, making him look at you, “hey, I’m okay. There’s no need to go fight someone over it.” he eyes you, checking for any sign of harm and making sure this wasn’t the laugh before the tears and when he realizes all is well, he begins to relax, “okay fine. No one gets to toss you around. Well, no one other than me.”

Your brow quirks and your lips curl into a smirk. He just went from sweet puppy to protective bulldog and it was very attractive. “Oh you’re a big shot now are ya? It took you months to kiss me, which I initiated by the way, how long am I going to have to wait for you to toss me around?”

Ethan can’t even begin to hide his shock at what just came out of your mouth. you flip that switch in him so quick. it’s laughable how his mouth gapes and eyes widen for the slightest second before he recovers. He loves how forward you’re being and he grins, “excuse me? You’re saying you want me to toss you around? I think I could arrange that. Bet you’d look even more pretty asking me for it.”

“is that not what i just did? or do you need to hear a ‘please’ attached to that?” your fingers trailing up and and down his arms as you tease him. “are you one of those guys that requires manners in bed or cant we just get down and dirty?”

He’d swallow hard, trying to see if you were being serious or not but when you don’t back down he takes the initiative. “Oh we can do down and dirty if you want but can you handle it? I don’t want you whining so maybe you need to set yourself a safe word now.”

You plaster a sweet smile on your face and toss your hair over your shoulder before leaning in. “there’s only one way to find out. I dont know how to make this any clearer for you. I don’t care what you do, just fuck me.”

Ethan sucks in a breath at your brash words, you were throwing curve balls left and right tonight and he’d be damned if he didn’t go for that homerun. He rolls his tongue along the inside of his bottom lip, making you bite yours as your eyes track his every movement. He works to slow his breathing enough to say two words, “say less”, before he’s making a beeline for the exit with you in tow.

Your adrenaline is pumping with every hurried step and your body wants him now. You tug at where your hands are connected and ethan glances over his shoulder to meet your gaze. His eyes are wild, jaw set, and you know he wants this just as bad as you do. You try to pull him down the hallway to the bedroom, bathroom, anywhere really, but he puts his foot down. “Ive fantasized about this for way too long and you’re not just some hookup im gonna fuck in someone else’s house” he says shaking his head. Of all times for him to be gentlemanly, now was really not opportune.

“Ethan,” you whine. You could see him already start to cave, hearing you say his name like that.

“No,” he says, though less convincingly this time. His hands come up on either side of your cheeks, cradling your face and he lowers his head so that he's peering down at you. “i’m taking you home.”

While that might happen, in fact you counted on it, it just wasn't going to happen yet. You looped your fingers through his belt loops and pulled his hips flush with yours. You tried your hardest to wipe the smirk off your face at feeling how hard he already was, the reward of the night’s efforts, and tried to look as innocent as possible. But you can’t help glancing down at where your bodies met before asking, “and what if i can’t wait that long, E, what if i need you now?”

You can visibly see his resolve shatter into a million pieces and you know you’ve just gotten your way. Ethan’s mouth opens and closes before “fuck” tumbles out. You giggle, pushing up on your toes to kiss him hard before pulling him to the closest door.

“One round and then i’m taking you home and we’re doing this the right way.” he warns you as he locks the door, hands hungrily finding your body once more and hoisting you up so that your legs wrap around his waist. His lips latch onto your neck and find that sweet spot in a matter of seconds. “Ethan, im only gonna say this one more time,” you say in between pants as his teeth bite down, “i dont care what you do, just fuck me already.”

#ethan edwards #my writing #umich hockey

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