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ashwhowrites · 3 days

Note

Hi, love your work.

I was thinking a maybe a break up and make up fic with:

Angst Prompt 31. “You broke me! You ruined everything we had and- for what?”

Fluff prompt 7. “You’re the only person I want to spend my life with”

With Eddie Munson/Y/N Henderson or Y/N Wheeler. A sister from one of the main party.

Eddie and Y/N have been together before season 1. Season 1 happens, Y/N was there. Resulting in her getting closer to Steve or Jonathan, to which Eddie thinks Y/N is cheating on him. Even catches Steve/Jonathan comforting Y/N and gets the wrong idea. They break up. The younger brother of Y/N tells Eddie off and makes him rethink things. Leading to them getting back together.

Thank you so much! I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Friends? Or something else?

Y/N Wheeler was quite different from her sister, Nancy. Nancy liked the boy next door vibe, and Y/N liked the rebel bad boy. Y/N didn't see what Nancy ever saw in Steve in the beginning. But he turned out to be a sweet guy when Nancy stomped on his heart.

She felt bad for Steve, but Y/N wanted to spend her free time with Eddie. It was no shock that the two fell for each other. Eddie was exactly her type, the leather, the attitude, and the nasty mouth he kissed her with.

Anyone could see she was smitten with the boy. She kissed the ground he walked on. She would do anything he asked, and do it happily.

It was a shame all he did was doubt her love for him

~~~

Eddie and Steve didn't really get along. Back when Nancy and Steve were together, the sisters loved double dates.

As Y/N fed Eddie fries and shared chocolate milkshakes, Nancy and Steve would argue across from them. Half of their double dates ended with Eddie and Y/N sneaking off.

Eddie didn't like the way Steve carried himself. He thought he was so superior compared to the rest of them and that didn't sit well with Eddie. And Y/N thought the same. She hated the way he treated Eddie.

Y/N just couldn't get along with Steve.

Until Nancy broke up with him and he finally showed his true self.

She couldn't lie. She felt bad for Steve. He showed up to their house with flowers but Nancy was already out with friends. Y/N couldn't leave him outside and alone. She let him in and before she knew it she was comforting him.

He cried into her arms as he talked about how Nancy was all he had left.

"I'll be here for you, I promise."

And she meant it. Whenever Steve called, she listened to what he had to say. Nancy was a little bothered at first. She found it weird her ex-boyfriend was using her little sister as a shoulder. But then Steve began to change, in a way Nancy thought wasn't possible.

The friendship helped Steve and Nancy accept that. It even helped get them back on normal speaking terms.

Eddie hated it, though. He hated having Y/N in his lap, rocking her hips against his. His tongue battled hers as the music played through his shitty speakers.

"Wheeler, call for Wheeler."

Steve's voice cut through the moment like a knife. The static voice worked its way through the talkie and Y/N pulled back.

"One second," she whispered.

Eddie felt his stomach turn as she grabbed the talkie and went outside. He wanted to trust her, he so badly did. But it was so hard when she'd always leave the room to talk to him. Why can't she talk to him in front of her boyfriend? It meant she was hiding something.

She had to be cheating on him.

And the thought of it broke his heart.

The one time he was in love, she found someone else.

What Eddie didn't know was that Steve and Y/N found themselves thrown into some type of supernatural portal. Something called the upside down? She wasn't quite sure what it all meant yet, but all she knew was that she and Steve fought hand in hand for months on end.

The world seemed to be back to normal and they wanted to keep it that way. She didn't want Eddie to get dragged into all of it. She'd never forgive herself if something happened to him. So she demanded every single one in the gang keep what happened a secret.

It was sworn that Eddie never found out what happened a few months back.

As a result of being at war with Steve, meant their friendship grew so strong that they truly became best friends. They leaned on each other when they needed it the most.

Eddie didn't understand how one minute she hated Steve and the next, she ran the second he called. He knew something happened between them. He tried to piece together a timeline, but he drew blanks.

She bounced back into the trailer with an apologetic smile on her face.

"Steve needs to talk some stuff out. He got in a fight with his dad. Can we raincheck the movie?" she asked

Eddie fought the urge to roll his eyes. He wasn't surprised.

"Sure thing," Eddie smiled. He was good at pretending that nothing was wrong. So well that she had no idea she was ruining their relationship the more she picked Steve.

~~~

"Do you think you'll come to the hideout tonight?" Eddie asked as he wrapped his arms around Y/N. Her back to his chest as she crammed books in her locker.

His lips kissed her neck as he swayed them back and forth.

"Ew, get a room." Nancy gagged, but a smile on her face. Nancy loved seeing her sister in love. She was the main reason Nancy ended things with Steve.

Nancy wanted what Y/N and Eddie had, and she didn't feel like she did with Steve.

"Um, I'm sorry but I don't think I can." Y/N cringed as Eddie's touch was gone in a second.

Nancy sensed the air change and quickly left them alone. Nancy knew tonight was a meeting with the gang, they were worried the upside down was opening again. But Eddie couldn't know.

"Don't even tell me it's because you'll be with Steve." Eddie snapped.

Y/N felt nervous to turn around. She gulped as she turned around, that same apologetic look in her eyes.

"Why now? Can he just go to fucking therapy and stop using my girlfriend?"

"Eds, be nice," she tried, but she could tell by the look on his face that he was strongly irritated.

"What's wrong?" she asked, she reached to wrap her arms around his neck. She didn't hide the pain she felt when he backed away.

"What's wrong? What's wrong is that my girlfriend doesn't seem to give a shit that I exist." Eddie spat, he wanted to keep his anger in check but he couldn't help but sound pissed.

"Of course I do! Tonight I just had prior plans."

"Cancel and come with me," Eddie said, his voice soft as he grabbed her hand. He turned his puppy eyes to her as he begged.

"I can't cancel, Eds." She sighed sadly

The anger washed up as quickly as it washed away.

He dropped her hand like it burned. Her hand was dead against her side as it dangled.

"Why not?" he challenged

"They all need me, baby," she said softly

Eddie shook his head and chuckled darkly.

"They do or Steve does?"

"Eddie, you know it's not like that, right?" She said, her heart broke as she watched the insecurity flash across his face. Had he been upset about Steve all this time? Was she a horrible girlfriend for not noticing?

"Just sometimes I need my girlfriend too," he said sadly, then walked off.

"Eddie, no wait," she said, she grabbed his hand. She felt her throat close up as he sniffled.

"Forget it. I'll tell you about the show whenever I see you."

"Eddie, please. I'm sorry." she tried, she wanted to tell him the truth but she couldn't.

"I know, I'll see you later," he said, his mouth in a tight line as he walked away.

Y/N couldn't focus during the meeting. Her brain focused on the little fight with Eddie. Had she been neglecting him? She would never intentionally hurt him and she hated that she still did.

Steve was listening to Dustin when he heard sniffles. He looked beside him and watched as Y/N silently cried. Her head down as she used her shirt to catch the tears.

"You okay?" Steve whispered in her ear

"Course," she said, putting on a fake smile as she looked at him

But looking at Steve made her think of Eddie. And thinking of Eddie caused a loud sob to escape.

The gang all looked in her direction. Nancy and Mike watched with concern as she stood up.

"Sorry, need a minute." she apologized, she raced up the stairs and closed the basement door behind her.

She dropped her body on the front step and let the sobs take over her body. She cried into her hands as the afternoon played through her head on an endless loop.

Steve followed behind her, he sat next to her and he wrapped his arms around her. She turned her body into his and sobbed. Her wet tears soaked his shirt as she sobbed.

"What is going on?" he whispered, he gently rubbed her back as she tried to get ahold of herself.

She told him everything that happened, Steve felt a puddle of guilt in his stomach. He pulled her away, it was his fault Eddie was upset.

They were lost in their own world, no idea that as Steve placed a comforting kiss on her forehead Eddie was in the driveway.

Eddie's heavy feet stomped towards them. They jumped apart hearing his boots crunch the sticks below.

Steve stood up and held his hands in defense

"Munson, I swear it-" but he didn't get to finish his sentence.

Eddie went at him, a huge right punch connected straight against Steve's eye. Steve crumbled to the grass instantly as he held his eye.

"EDDIE!" Y/N gasped, she quickly jumped in front of Steve as Eddie went to charge forward.

"Not like that right?" Eddie spat, his voice filled with venom as he shot her words right back at her.

"Eddie," Steve groaned as he stood up. He looked at Eddie with one eye, holding the bruising one. "It's not what you think, I swear."

"I don't give a single fuck about what you have to say" Eddie hissed as he pointed at Steve over Y/N's shoulder.

"Steve, can you give us a second?" Y/N asked, but her eyes never left Eddie.

Once she heard the front door shut, she took a deep breath.

"How could you do this to me?" Eddie asked, his voice cracked as the first round of tears fell down his face. "We were so in love. You used to love me so much. You used to never leave my side and now? Now I can barely remember the last time we even had sex."

"Oh Eddie," she whimpered as she stepped forward and held his face in her hands. She cried seeing him cry. "We are in love! I still love you. I love you more and more every day. I'm sorry I've gotten so caught up with Steve but I promise you it is not because I have feelings for him. I didn't know you were missing me so much."

"How could you know? You won't see me for more than ten minutes." he snapped, he grabbed her hands and shoved them off of his face. She tried to ignore the drop of her heart.

"You're right. I am so sorry. Talk to me, let's talk it out."

"I don't think I even want to anymore," he confessed. YN shook her head as she panicked.

"No, baby, You can do it, just tell me what you are feeling, please," she begged, she fought hard not to touch him. All she wanted was to wrap her arms around him but she couldn't tell if he wanted her to touch him.

"You broke me! You ruined everything we had and- for what?" Eddie said, he lashed out as his tears turned into anger. His voice rose. "For Steve? I mean how could you even do this to Nancy?"

"She doesn't care because she knows we are just friends!" Y/N argued. "Like I've told you! There is nothing between him and I."

"YOU AND I USED TO BE FRIENDS, SHIT CHANGES Y/N!" he screamed, no doubt letting the neighbors know a fight was breaking out

"That's different." she cried, tears falling down her face.

"HOW?" he screamed as he stepped closer. Right in her face as he demanded his answer.

"BECAUSE I WAS ALREADY IN LOVE WITH YOU, ASSHOLE. I KNEW I LOVED YOU AND I HAD TO PRETEND I DIDN'T BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO LOSE YOU AS A FRIEND. THAT IS WHY IT IS DIFFERENT. I'VE NEVER WANTED TO KISS STEVE OR WONDERED WHAT HE TASTED LIKE. IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU!" she cried, it hurt to have him so close and not touch him. She wanted to have the right words to say.

"Then why has it only been Steve, lately?" Eddie asked, breaking down as the words left his tongue. More tears fell as he looked into her eyes. He used to see through her, but something happened and her eyes never told him the truth anymore.

"I can't tell you because it would kill me if you got hurt because of me." She watched as he nodded and choked back his tears. His red eyes looked into hers.

"You've been hurting me for months, and you are still breathing," her heart shattered as he began to step back, "Steve or not, it's clear you don't have the time for me. Take me off that full plate you have."

"Eddie, please don't" she sobbed as he kept stepping back. With each step he took, she made that step forward.

"If you ever truly loved me, you'll let me heal from you. I don't deserve to feel second best by my own girlfriend."

With those words, she stopped. She planted her feet in the grass as he turned around. She covered her mouth as he got in his van. Before he closed the door, she yelled his name.

He looked over at her

"I need you to know that I'm doing what you asked. I'll leave you alone and give you the space you need because it'll prove that I love you. Even if it kills me to never be with you again."

She watched as he didn't say a word, just closing his door and taking off down the road.

~~~

Mike had seen both his sisters experience breakups, but nothing as bad as Y/N.

It's been a week since the breakup, and Y/N barely leaves her room. She came out to use the bathroom, sometimes she'd sit in the kitchen and stare at the phone. She'd pray that he would call, but she knew he wouldn't. After a few hours, she'd go right back up to her room.

"Poor girl. I've never seen her so heartbroken." Karen said as she sat down at the dinner table. "Has she done any of the schoolwork she missed?"

"Barely, I've turned in a few of her assignments." Nancy said, "She won't even talk to me about it."

"Shame on that boy for hurting her," Karen said as she shook her head, "I wish I could smack some sense into him."

His mom's words gave Mike an idea.

The next morning Mike biked to Eddie's trailer. It was a Saturday morning so he knew Eddie would be rotting in bed.

He was done seeing his sister lose herself

and he was done with Eddie's cranky ass during Hellfire.

He threw his bike into the dirt as he raced up to Eddie's trailer. He pounded on the door.

"Wheeler?" Eddie said confused, his eyes half open as he yawned.

"We need to talk," Mike snapped, letting himself in the trailer and sitting on the couch.

"Great, another fight with a wheeler," Eddie mumbled to himself.

"What can I help you with?" Eddie asked as he stood.

"Why does it look like you are sleeping on the couch?" Mike asked with sass as he pushed the bundle of blankets out of his way. "Bedroom reeks of all the random girls you've been sleeping with?" he hissed.

"Woah, little Wheeler. What I do in my bedroom is none of your business. What makes you think I'm sleeping with random girls? Is that how your sister is dealing with the breakup?" Eddie asked, he couldn't help but get mad at his own words.

"Oh shut your mouth," Mike snapped, "my sister isn't this whore you claim her to be."

"I know, that was uncalled for," Eddie said, "how...how is she?" he couldn't help but ask. It had been eating him up all week. He hadn't seen her once, hadn't heard her voice, and it killed him. He had no idea if she was breaking apart or completely fine with Eddie gone.

"Answer my question first," Mike demanded, he got off the couch and walked to Eddie's room. If there was a girl in there, Mike swore he'd kill Eddie before the upside-down had the chance.

"WHEELER!" Eddie yelled but Mike carried on. He flew Eddie's door open. And it was empty. The bed set is perfectly made, with a flower on the pillow with a note attached.

"And what slut is this for? Moving on already?" Mike snapped. He reached forward and grabbed the note.

"Give me that!" Eddie snapped back, snatching the note from his hands. "I'm not sleeping with anyone, okay? I haven't been in here since the breakup. She made my bed that morning and wrote me a note, and this was the first flower someone had given me. I just wanted to leave everything the way she touched it." Eddie explained. The room held too many memories, and it smelled of her.

"Can we talk in the living room?"

Mike nodded, knowing not to push Eddie further.

They walked back into the living room as Eddie closed his bedroom door. Eddie took a seat next to Mike.

"She's heartbroken," Mike said, Eddie looked over at him. "She doesn't eat, barely sleeps, and stares at the phone the second school ends until she knows you are asleep. She's miserable and it's all your fault!" Mike said, pissed at Eddie for hurting his sister. Mike stood up so he could tower over Eddie, by a little.

"You broke her and you better fix it!"

"I didn't do anything, Mike. You are too young to understand, but our relationship wasn't the same." Eddie sighed. He did feel awful hearing about how bad she was doing. Guilt in his bones as he pictured her staring at the phone.

There were so many times he wanted to call. At one point he didn't care if she ever had feelings for Steve, he wanted to be with her anyway. He'd watch her kiss Steve a thousand times if she still picked Eddie to come home to.

"I might be young, but I'm not an idiot. Steve never liked her, he is still hung up on Nancy. And Y/N never liked Steve more than a friend. Hell, she barely understood what Nancy saw in him because he wasn't you. She is so in love with you that you are literally the only guy she sees worthy. I don't blame you for wanting to protect yourself. But she has been killing herself to protect you."

"But I don't understand why she can't tell me! We've been in a relationship for over a year, and she still has these secrets!" Eddie argued.

"It's not her secret to tell! It's mine, okay?" Mike said, Eddie looked at him confused. "What I'm about to tell you is going to sound insane. But you have to believe me. It'll explain why Y/N thought it would protect you to keep you out of it."

Eddie sat and listened as Mike explained what happened over the past year. The upside down and the battles. How Y/N and Steve got thrown together and they could only turn to each other because of it. But it all made sense. She kept promising she couldn't tell because if he got hurt, it would kill her. Because if Eddie got hurt, he wouldn't survive.

~~~

Eddie waited a day before he picked up the phone. He felt nervous as he dialed the number he knew by heart.

It rang for a second before a voice appeared on the other end

"Hello, Y/N speaking,"

Eddie closed his eyes at the sadness in her voice.

"Hey, darling. It's, uh me, Eddie." He stuttered out

"I knew it was you by the first word," she laughed sadly. She hated how hard it seemed to talk to him. Like she didn't know what to say.

"Right," he chuckled, "I was hoping we could talk? Maybe better in person?" He drummed his hands against the wall as he heard her breathing heavily through the phone.

"Yeah, um when and where?" Her voice cracked as she blinked back her tears. This was the final moment, he wanted to break it off officially. She gave him his space and he was ready for it to be forever.

"Please don't cry, sweetheart." He begged, choking up himself as he listened to her.

"I'm fine!" She lied, "Just tell me when and where."

"My place and the sooner the better."

He clenched his eyes in pain as she whimpered and let out a soft okay before the phone went dead.

She drove over to his trailer, unable to keep the tears back.

She was scared to see him again. She barely kept it together hearing his voice again. She didn't want to cry when she saw him, but it was all she had been doing for the past week.

Eddie was against his trailer smoking a cigarette when she pulled up. She took another deep breath as she turned off the car. Even having that small glimpse sent her head into a spiral.

Eddie smashed his cigarette as she walked up to him. She wore one of his old hoodies, and a pair of sweats she stole after their first movie date. Her eyes were majority swollen and red. Her nose was red as she rubbed it with his sleeve.

"Hi, sweets" Eddie cooed, as he opened his arms. Within seconds her body crashed into his as she wrapped her arms around him. He wrapped his arms around her. He rested his chin on her head, inhaling her scent. He kissed her head, and every painful feeling in his body melted away.

She sobbed as she inhaled his clothes. All she wanted was to be with him again, and she was. She kept squeezing him tighter, hoping he'd feel closer.

"Don't cry, my love," he said into her hair, rubbing her back.

"I missed you so much," she sobbed, "it was so hard to give you the space you wanted."

"I missed you too, baby girl. I'm so sorry I made you give me space. I'm so sorry for the mess I made since I didn't communicate when I should have. Let's go inside." He let go of her body but laced his hand with hers as they walked into the trailer. Eddie led her to his room, he opened the door and closed it behind him. She refused to let go of his hand, but he didn't ask her to.

She wasn't sure how long she'd have before he wanted space again. He sat beside her as she looked around his room. She noticed it was the same as a week ago, but she didn't say anything.

instead of sitting next to her, he dropped to his knees and rested his head on her lap. She smiled and ran her fingers through his hair, she scratched his head in the way he loves.

"I'm sorry for fucking this up. I should have trusted you, I'm sorry I didn't. I thought I needed space, but all it did was make me miss you." He melted into her touch as her fingers continued to run through his hair. "I'm so in love with you. I wasn't used to sharing you and I felt like I was losing you." His puppy eyes looked up at her as he sat up on his knees.

He laced his hands with hers and rested them on her lap

"I'm sorry for not realizing how much I was hurting you. You are the only boy I'd ever want. I love you and that won't ever change." She said she unlaced their hands so she could cup his face. Her thumbs rubbed his wet cheeks as she leaned in and placed her lips on his.

Eddie wrapped his arms around her waist, his palms resting on her back as he kissed her back. Eddie straightened himself as he deepened the kiss. He kept his lips on hers as he pushed her back and stood up. Her back was against his mattress as he climbed on top of her. The kiss grew more intense and hungry as her hands moved to his stomach. His right hand rested on her cheek, he moaned as he slipped his tongue inside her mouth.

The kiss sent goosebumps rising on her skin. The feelings she felt when she kissed Eddie never went away, it was always butterflies and needing more.

Eddie pulled away for air, his eyes soaking her in. She was slow to open her eyes but when she did she was staring into Eddie's.

“You’re the only person I want to spend my life with” she whispered

"Just like the note said." he smiled

"Just like the note said," she laughed. Already missing his lips, she placed her hand on the back of his neck and brought his lips to hers. She frowned when Eddie pulled back a little, not letting their lips meet.

"Before I get carried away with you," Eddie winked, she blushed and bit her lip. "Will you be my girl again?"

"I never stopped,"

Eddie smiled and smashed his lips back on hers. They hungrily touched each other, showing how much they missed it and never wanted space again.

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#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fanfic #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson request #eddie munson fluff x reader #eddie munson angst #eddie munson angst x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x wheeler! reader #ashwhowrites

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sunkissed-zegras · 23 hours

Text

𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐋𝐄𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐆𝐎, 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐓'𝐒 𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐋 ─ PB⁵

౨ৎ ─ summary | this is part one, brother's best friend trope! bryce and paige had been best friends since they were kids, and she's never really been close to his little sister, y/n until she transfers to uconn after a tumultuous freshman year.

─ word count | 10k words (holy fuck i'm so sorry)

─ warnings | VERY UNEDITED (just wanted to get this masterpiece out for yall since i've been teasing for a couple months) brother's best friend trope, language, kinda suggestive, couple kisses pretty fluffy, lots of tension, pretty fast-paced, LOTSSSSS of straight up yap, allusions to SA but could be interpreted as something else, drinking/alcohol usage, idk nothing else?

─ ev's notes | this might be straight up trash but this was a request from like early march, i wanted to do it justice and hopefully ???? i did. i'm gonna be honest, i blacked out while writing this and i'm too lazy to edit but hopefully it's good enough for yall!!!!!!!

pls lmk what yall thought!!!!!! i love hearing yalls feedback in my inbox 💘💘 mwah mwah mwah, enjoy!!!!!!

⇨ missing out on updates? check out my wcbb masterlist!

"LET'S GO, THAT'S MY BOY!" PAIGE SHOUTS loudly from the stands, earning a few amused glances from others in the bleacher.

Bryce, her best friend, hadn't done anything special but Paige was the ultimate hype-woman. Bryce heard her shout and shot her his signature smirk before focusing back on the game. They'd know each other since middle school ─ and they've been practically inseparable since.

After winning the game by 3 points, Paige walked through the crowd to try and find Bryce. And after searching for a moment, she spotted Bryce talking with a girl outside the locker room and began walking toward them. Before she could tease him, she quickly recognized the familiar face.

"Y/N?" She called out and both of the siblings turned around. Paige was almost shocked at how much you'd grown up. She glanced up and down, taking in your appearance.

"Paige!" Your eyes widened, your lips curving up in a smile as the taller blonde pulled you into a tight hug. "How the hell did you manage to get even taller?"

Paige chuckled as she squeezed you tightly in the embrace. "I guess I just can't help it," she joked, releasing you from the hug but keeping her hands on your shoulders as she looked at you. The last time she saw her sophomore year at UConn and your senior year at Hopkins, which has been almost three years.

After your senior year, your parents moved out to your grandparents house up in Colorado so even during holidays, she didn't see you or your brother anymore.

You grinned, shaking your head in amusement. "Well, you definitely make me feel short," you joked back.

"Well, you are short. Don't know how Brycey here got so tall." Paige teased as you laughed. Paige was shocked at how much you'd changed; your skin was glowing, your hair was longer, you'd gotten your braces off, you finally found your sense of style... She couldn't help but stare.

"Well, I guess he got all the height genes," you joked, playfully poking fun at Bryce's towering stature. "Maybe not the cute genes, though."

That's for sure, Paige thought to herself as she gazed at you. She realized she was staring before she glanced back at Bryce, a laugh escaping her mouth.

"Okay, okay." Bryce rolled his eyes as you joined Paige's laughter. "Me and the boys are gonna go celebrate. You guys down?"

"Well, I'm still trying to unpack-"

Paige cut you off as she spoke for you. "Oh, we're down. You can unpack later, B will help you."

"Wait, what." Bryce looked in between you two as he scoffed.

Paige flashed Bryce a smirk, clearly enjoying the moment. "Yep, you heard right. Consider it a big brother duty."

"I didn't sign up to be her brother." Bryce rolled his eyes playfully but quickly relented as Paige sent him a mocking glare. "Fine, fine whatever."

You chuckled at Paige and Bryce, realizing how much you'd missed their banter. "Looks like I've got myself a brand new big brother," you teased, giving Bryce a playful nudge.

Bryce grinned, shaking his head in amusement. "Lucky you," he replied with a smirk, playfully ruffling your hair.

"Hey! I just got a blowout!"

──

You and Paige sat in a different table than the team, opting for a table without a group of noisy college boys. Neither of you minded though, you finally had the chance to catch up since either of you had seen each other in so long.

"So, how's basketball?" You sipped on your fountain drink as Paige chewed on the pizza, trying to swallow quickly to speak. You let out a laugh at Paige's eagerness to talk about her sport.

"Basketball's been good, really intense this season," Paige replied once she managed to swallow her bite of pizza. "We've been training hard, but it's paying off. We're getting some great wins," she continued, her eyes lighting up with excitement.

You nodded, feeling a surge of pride for Paige. "I know, I've been keeping up with your games. Dad always watches your games and texts us updates on the groupchat, it's so funny."

Paige laughed, your family had always been really supportive of her ─ they'd slowly become her second family. "Dude, that's so funny. He doesn't even like basketball."

"He probably watches more of your games than Bryce's," you quipped with a playful grin, earning a chuckle from Paige.

"Don't let Bryce hear you, he'll kill me." Paige shook her head in amusement as she took another bite of the pizza. "Anyway, how are you liking UConn? Bryce told you'd transferred but you know how my schedule can be-"

"No, Paige, I totally get it." You smiled softly at her, nodding understandingly. "UConn's been great, actually. It's been a big adjustment, but I'm starting to settle in."

"I'm glad you liked it. Honestly, I never knew why you didn't come here in the first place ─ imagine, two of L/N at UConn." She exaggerated as you laughed, finishing up your slice of piece of pizza.

You chuckled at Paige's playful exaggeration, shaking your head in amusement. "I just didn't wanna go too far from home."

Paige understood why you were so scared, she remembers how shy you were when you were a kid. You really kept to yourself, the only reason why people even knew of you was because of your brother, who was a basketball legend. But seeing you now, she's sure no one would believe her.

You carried yourself so much differently, you were so much more well-spoken and confident. But it was a subtle difference, you hadn't changed so drastically to the point where she didn't even recognize you. You had kept all the parts that made you, you and gotten more comfortable in your own skin. You were so alluring to Paige, something about you just made her feel good.

"I get it, but hey. You're here now." Paige grinned as she finally finished up her food. She glanced around the shop before she turned back to you. "Do you wanna go walk around campus? I can show you around, so you know where all cool places are at."

If Paige was being honest, she just wanted to spend some more time alone with you. She convinced herself it was simply because she'd wanted to catch up more, I mean... she hadn't seen you in over two years.

You glanced over at Bryce, he was so engulfed with his friends you were sure he had forgotten you were even here. Plus, you did want to go explore the campus a little more. You snapped your gaze back to Paige, a small smile playing on your face.

"Sure, let's go."

You and Paige got up from the booth and left the shop, out into the cool night air. Despite the late hour, it wasn't completely empty ─ there were a couple people still out. You began walking, the cool air flowing through your hair.

Paige glanced back at you, continuing to analyze you and how much you'd grown up the last year. She'd always been closer to Bryce because they shared so many interests but also because you'd always been very shy and closed off. Up until your sophomore year, she hadn't really talked to you ─ but now, it felt familiar but different all at once.

However, Paige didn't mind one bit. She'd always wanted to be closer to you and now it seemed like the perfect time.

You caught her gaze and mirrored her smile, amusement evident in your expression. "What?"

"What do you mean, what?" She mocked your voice and you shook your head in faux-annoyance. "Can't I look at you? I mean jeez, you... you were always pretty but damn."

You let out a breathless laugh as you rolled your eyes, despite the warm feeling that began to form on your face. Paige had always had the teasing personality but for some reason, it felt different now ─ more personal. Maybe you were just over analyzing it. "Shut up, says you."

"What about me?" Paige teased as her gaze lingered on your face. The cool air did nothing to soothe the awful warm feeling on your face as you scoffed, Paige was such a tease.

You stumbled over your words as Paige laughed, trying to explain yourself. "Well... you know what I mean. You're really pretty."

Paige's laughter softened into a warm smile, and for a moment, the air seemed charged with a new sense of closeness between you. "Aw, thanks, Y/N," she replied, her tone sincere as she reached out to gently nudge your shoulder.

You felt a rush of relief at her response, grateful that she hadn't misinterpreted your awkward attempt at complimenting her. "Yeah, of course," you replied as shy smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

"I mean... you're always teasing me, and now you're all... complimenting me and stuff," you stammered, feeling the weight of Paige's gaze on you.

Paige's expression softened, a gentle smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "Hey, I'm just speaking the truth. You know," she replied, her voice soft and sincere. "When we were in high school I knew, like five guys who had the biggest crushes on you."

Your eyebrows knitted in confusion as you laughed, why would she bring that up? "Really? Well no one ever asked me out," your tone came out amused but there was an underlying hurt to it.

Paige shook her head as she scoffed, "Yeah it's Bryce's fault. He told all the boys if they ever asked you out, he'd break their kneecaps or some shit like that."

You burst into laughter at Paige's remark, the tension dissipating as you realized the absurdity of the situation. "Seriously? Bryce said that?"

Paige nodded, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Oh yeah, he was very protective of you. Said something about not wanting anyone to break your heart or something like that."

"Well, I guess that explains why no one ever asked me out," you replied with a chuckle, feeling a sense of gratitude for your brother's unwavering support. "I don't blame him, the boys on the basketball teams were always sluts."

"Sluts is one way to put it," She laughed at your wording, nudging you playfully. "Looks like you were always off-limits." Paige wet her lips as she kept gazing at you, a smile playing on her lips. You didn't miss the way her tone shifted, her eyes scanning your body.

You couldn't help but notice the change in Paige's demeanor, the way her laughter faded into a more contemplative silence. Her gaze felt almost... lingering, and you couldn't shake the feeling of warmth that spread through you under her scrutiny.

There was something different in the way she looked at you, something that sent a shiver down your spine and made your heart race. As the moment stretched on, you felt a rush of uncertainty wash over you. What was happening between you and Paige? Was it just a fleeting moment of attraction, or something more?

You felt like your mind was racing, you were absolutely insane. You couldn't gather your thoughts as you swallowed.

"Yeah, I guess so," you replied, your voice slightly breathless as you tried to shake off the wave of uncertainty. Paige's playful teasing had taken on a new tone, one that left you feeling both exhilarated and very, very nervous.

Paige's smile widened into a smirk. "So, what about now? Are you still off-limits?" She asked, her voice low and. And before you could respond, she continued. "You know, you've really grown up a lot since high school,"

"Thanks, Paige," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper as you struggled to meet her gaze.

Paige's gaze softened, her gaze lingering on you in a way that made your cheeks flush with heat. "Anytime." She replied, her tone light. "So, where's your dorm?"

You cleared your throat, trying to compose yourself as you gestured in the direction of your dorm. "It's just a couple of blocks from here, Hilltop Halls"" you replied, your voice a little steadier than before.

"Oh shit, me too. How'd you manage that?" Paige laughed as she shook her head in amusement. Those were usually the dorms for student athletes and honors students, and she didn't recall you being either.

You shrugged, a sheepish grin spreading across your face. "Honestly, I have no idea. Just got lucky with the housing assignment, I guess."

Paige raised an eyebrow as she eyed you. "Hmm, mysterious," she teased as she smirked, her tone suggestive. "Maybe you have some hidden talents you haven't told me about."

You burst out laughing, rolling your eyes. "Oh yeah? Like what?"

Paige kept smirking back at you before you nudged her shoulder playfully, she let out a couple chuckles. "Hey, I don't know what you've been up in college. Who knows, you might be a party girl or something."

"Oh shut up," you couldn't hide the smirk as she let out a dramatic gasp.

"You are a party girl! Bad, bad girl Y/N." She tsk'd dramatically as you rolled your eyes. "Does Bryce know you're out here causing trouble?" Paige continued, her voice dripping with mock concern.

You laughed, shaking your head at Paige's exaggerated antics. "Oh please, Bryce doesn't need to know anything,"

Paige smirked, her gaze lingering on you with a playful glint. "Well, then, it'll be our little secret then."

You and Paige arrived at the entrance to Hilltop Halls, walking into the building then up the stairs. "What floor are you on?" Paige's voice rung in the otherwise, pretty dead hallway.

You glanced over at Paige, a smile playing on your lips. "I'm on the third floor," you replied, leading the way up the staircase. "It's not too far."

"Damn, I'm on the fifth floor." She spoke as she followed closely behind you, her footsteps echoing softly on the stairs as you ascended to the third floor. "But I do know someone who lives on this floor."

And right as those words flew out of her mouth, the door on their right opened to reveal a very tired KK. Paige let out a laugh at the coincidence, looking in between you two.

"Well, speak of the devil," Paige remarked with a grin, her eyes dancing with amusement.

KK rubbed her eyes sleepily, a yawn escaping her lips. "Hey, Paige. Who's your friend?" Her lips curved into a tired but otherwise friendly smile.

"It's Bryce's little sister. She just transferred and she lives on this floor," Paige introduced you with a warm smile. "Y/N, meet KK, one of my teammates."

"Oh, Bryce's little sister? What are you doing with his little sister?" KK's smile turned into a smirk as she raised her eyebrows, gazing at Paige knowingly.

"Oh shut up, it's not like that." Paige's face blushed as KK laughed, examining you with a smile. "She's like a sister to me."

KK's smirk widened as she continued to tease Paige. "Uh-huh, sure she is," she replied, her tone laced with amusement.

Paige rolled her eyes, her cheeks flushing slightly as she shot KK a mock glare. "Seriously, KK. Bryce would kill me," she insisted.

"Yeah and you always like a challenge." KK raised her eyebrows before she finally met your gaze "You're a lot prettier than Brycey, I'll tell you that. Nice to meet you, Y/N," her gaze lingered on you longer than Paige liked, sending her a glare (that went unnoticed by you).

You smiled, feeling grateful for the warm welcome from both Paige and KK. "Thanks, KK. It's nice to meet you too," you replied warmly.

Before KK could respond, Paige grabs your arm and flashed you a grin. "Well, it's getting late and Y/N needs her beauty sleep. I'll see you later KK, love you."

Paige's words came out quick as she practically dragged you down the hallway, KK letting out another laugh. "Nice meeting you, KK! See you around," you called out with a smile.

As you guys finally got to your dorm room, Paige gave you a smile. "Sorry 'bout that, KK just likes to tease."

"No worries, Paige. It's all good," you reassured her with a smile, appreciating her protective nature. "She seems really fun."

Paige returned your smile, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Yeah, she is. She means well."

There was a comfortable silence as you gazed at each other for a few moments. Paige was the first to break the eye contact, chucking as her gaze lingered on the door then back to you.

"This was fun," Paige remarked, her voice soft but filled with warmth as she glanced around the hallway. "Let's hang out more, yeah?"

"Yeah." You smiled as your cheeks flushed slightly, nervously chuckling. "Just let me know when, cus I know you're a busy woman."

"I definitely will," she assured you, her tone eager. "And don't worry, I'll make time for you."

You flushed as you gazed back at the blonde. "Thanks, P. Really,"

"Why are you thanking me, I'm your friend. Of course I'm gonna make time for you," Paige scoffed as if it meant nothing at all.

"Well you're a student athlete-"

"So what?" Paige laughed as she shook her. "You have to get inside your room before we talk out here for another hour,"

"Alright, alright, I'm going," you replied with a grin. "Goodnight, Paige,"

"Goodnight."

With a final wave, you entered your dorm room, ready to settle in for the night but you couldn't help but grin. Your cheeks had begun to hurt from how much you'd been laughing, you couldn't remember the last time you'd laughed that hard. And it was all because of a certain blonde.

You shook your head as you sighed at your own thoughts, you needed to relax. That's just how Paige is ─ flirty and a tease, that's all. Nothing more, nothing less.

──

"How was it?" Bryce's voice snapped you back to reality, pulling your attention away from the task at hand. You blinked, lost in thought as you turned to face Bryce.

You and Bryce had been silently sorting through your stuff for the past half hour, both too exhausted (and maybe a little hungover, in Bryce's case) to engage in much conversation.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you turned to face him. "How was what?"

"Hanging out with Paige?" Bryce's voice slightly agitated as he spoke in a matter-of-factly tone.

His question caught you off guard, and you paused for a moment before responding. "Oh, it was good. We caught up and uh, walked around campus," you replied, trying to sound nonchalant despite the butterflies at the mention of the girl you'd been thinking about non-stop for the last 24 hours.

"Turns out she lives a few floors above me," you added with a smile as you kept on sorting through your make-up.

"Oh, wait." Bryce paused as he processed the information, realization striking his expression as he smiled. "Oh, yeah! And the rest of the girl's basketball team, too. That's cool, though now I can just hang out with you for an hour and then Paige, don't have to waste gas or anything."

"You just realized that?" Your voice was amused as you glanced at Bryce, shaking your head in disbelief at your brother's stupidity.

Bryce chuckled, scratching the back of his neck sheepishly. "Hey, cut me some slack. My brain's still waking up," he replied with a grin. "Why'd you and Paige decide to run off like that. I looked away for two seconds and you were both gone."

"Well, uh..." You didn't know why you were so nervous under Bryce's gaze ─ it wasn't like he was accusing you of anything nor have you done anything wrong. "We just felt left out cus you were with your boys. And we needed some fresh air."

Bryce raised an eyebrow, a knowing smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. "Fresh air, huh?"

"Yeah, you know, just wanted to stretch our legs a bit," you replied with a shrug, hoping to brush off any suspicion.

And as if right on cue, you heard a knock on your door. Before you could call out to whoever it was, the familiar voice spoke up. "It's me, open up."

Bryce dropped the piece of clothing he was folding to open the door for Paige, a smile on his face. You leaned so you could also greet her, a bright smile on your face.

Paige laughed as she took in Bryce's disheveled appearance. "How hungover are you, 1 to 10?"

Bryce just rolled his eyes and opened your door wider so that Paige could enter the room as he walked away to continue the task at hand. "Shut up, Paige."

"Ooo, someone's cranky." Paige's voice was laced with amusement as you began laughing, soon joined by Paige as Bryce glared at the two of you.

Paige chuckled as she stepped into the room, glancing around with curiosity. "So, how's the unpacking going?"

You shrugged, gesturing to the scattered boxes and bags around the room. "We're getting there."

"Well I have something that might help you unwind. We have a kickback at my friend's place, are you two down?" Paige's invitation took you by surprise, but the prospect of unwinding after a long day of unpacking sounded appealing. You glanced over at Bryce, silently gauging his reaction.

"Not tonight, I'm still recovering from last night. And uh... I don't think you should either, you're gonna be hungover as hell." Bryce's voice was filled with concern as he glanced toward you then back at Paige.

Paige just rolled her eyes at his words. "Hey, don't let Brycey over here ruin the good mood. It'll be fun. And B, would I ever let anything bad happen to your little sister?"

Bryce's concern for both of your well-being was evident, but Paige's reassurance seemed to alleviate some of his worries. He sighed, shaking his head in resignation. "Whatever, just don't drink."

"Says you, I'm pretty sure you're still drunk right now." You joked as Paige swallowed a laugh as she exchanged a glance with both you and Bryce.

Bryce just rolled his eyes, a smirk playing on his lips. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. Just remember what I said."

Paige waved him off with a grin, turning back to you. "So, what do you say, Y/N? Kickback tonight?"

Your lips curved into a smile as you nodded. "Yes, for sure."

──

The party was going great, it was exactly what you needed after a weekend of just unpacking and settling in. It wasn't as big as you were used to but you were still having fun with Paige and her friends.

However, you did take Bryce's advice and opt out on the drinking, at least for tonight. You didn't wanna make a fool out of yourself in front of all the D1 athletes you were suddenly best friends with.

"Can't believe you're Bryce's little sister," Azzi laughed as she took you in once again. You were so much more put together and very pretty.

You chuckled, feeling a little self-conscious under Azzi's gaze despite her very friendly demeanor. "Yeah, I get that a lot," you replied with a smile, trying to remain modest despite the compliment.

Azzi nudged you playfully. "Well, you'll fit right in with us. Maybe even better than Bryce does," she teased, earning a laugh from Paige.

"He doesn't fit in with us. He fits in with Paige and KK, not us. He's very..." Ice tried to put into words but decided to just shrug, a sheepish smile on her lips. "He's just Bryce. No offense,"

You laughed at Ice's comment, nodding your head in amusement. "None taken. Yeah you're right, Bryce is... well, he's Bryce," you replied, knowing exactly what Ice meant.

Bryce had always been a bit of a character, and while you loved him dearly, you could understand why people might not get along with him.

Azzi laughed, nodding in agreement. "Exactly! But you, on the other hand, you're like... the cool, mysterious sister," she continued with a playful smile, causing the others to laugh and nod in agreement.

Paige grinned, coming to Bryce's defense per usual. "Hey, leave my boy alone. He's just special, okay? So what if he's cocky and kinda annoying."

"You guys don't know how annoying Bryce can get until you've had to share a hotel room with him," you sighed dramatically as you rolled your eyes.

"God bless you, I couldn't imagine." Ice replied with a chuckle, shaking her head in amusement. "I've heard stories from Paige and KK, the one with the toothbrush," she pretended to gag as Azzi laughed.

"It wasn't that bad-" Paige protested as you shushed her dramatically, laughing.

"It's okay, P, you don't have to lie and defend him." You laughed as Paige rolled her eyes, leaning back on the table with a smirk.

"I'm telling him you said that," Paige threatened with a playful grin, raising an eyebrow in mock warning.

You gasped dramatically, pretending to be frightened. "You wouldn't!"

"Yes, yes I would."

"You would not!"

"Yes, I would!"

Before you could reply, you were suddenly pushed slightly into Paige. Her hands instinctively reach to hold you up by your waist as her expression turns into a protective one as she glares up at the person. Not only were you knocked into, their drink had spilled all over your shirt. You felt the cold liquid seep through your shirt as you stumbled, caught off guard by the sudden push.

"Oh shit, I am so sorry." The man's voice rang out as he looked down at you then Paige. "Didn't see you two there," he spoke as he noted Paige's hands on your waist.

You nodded, trying to ignore the warmth spreading through your cheeks from both the embarrassment of being pushed and the closeness to Paige. "You're all good, don't worry about it."

Paige's grip on your waist loosened as she stepped back, her eyes scanning you to make sure you weren't hurt. "Watch where you're going next time."

However, the man did not walk away after that. His gaze lingered on you as he slowly wet his lips, a smile on his face. "I've never seen you here. You go to UConn?"

You exchanged a glance with Paige, feeling a bit uncomfortable under the man's intense gaze. "Yeah, just transferred here,"

Paige stepped in, her protective instincts kicking in as she subtly positioned herself between you and the man. "We were just heading to the bathroom to clean up. If you'll excuse us."

The guy didn't budge as he kept his gaze on your figure. "You know where that is? Maybe I can show you ladies."

Paige's expression turned icy as she stepped even closer to you, clearly not amused by the man's persistence. "We'll find it ourselves, thanks."

"Come on, don't be like that. I'm just trying to be friendly." he insisted, his tone taking on a slightly aggressive edge.

Azzi and Ice exchanged glances before Paige's nose flared in anger. "If you don't back up right now, I'm gonna punch you in the nose," her voice was sharp as she eyed him up and down.

He sighed as he pushed his hair back before finally backing off, walking away. Paige's grip never left your arm as she gave Ice and Azzi a thumbs up before leading you to the bathroom. She walked next to you, her hand on the small of your back.

As you reached the bathroom, she closed the door behind you with a sigh. A guilty look crossed her features as she met your gaze in the mirror. "I'm sorry about that, Y/N. That guy was way out of line," she apologized, her voice tinged with frustration.

You met Paige's gaze in the mirror, appreciating her concern. "It's okay, Paige," you assured her, giving her a grateful smile.

Paige returned the smile as she sighed. She grabbed a paper towel then gestured for you to sit on the sink, which you obliged. She wet the paper towel and began cleaning up your shirt that was now soaking wet with beer and God knows what else.

There wasn't much use though, there was no way she was getting it out. But she kept dabbing slowly, catching your gaze every once in a while and giving you a small smile. The moment felt intimidate especially with the close proximity and the gentle touch of her hands on your shirt. You couldn't help but feel a flutter of warmth in your stomach as you watched her, her focused expression softened by the dim lighting of the bathroom.

"So," Paige began as she met your eye. "Tell me more about your party girl era, I bet you lived it up in Minnesota. You were probably the life of the party."

You chuckled softly at Paige's teasing, feeling a slight blush creeping onto your cheeks. "Yeah it was fun for awhile. But y'know... got a bit carried away," your tone slightly changed as you a forced a smile, which didn't go unnoticed by Paige.

Paige noticed the shift in your tone and expression, her playful demeanor softening into one of concern. "Hey, you okay?" she asked gently, her eyes searching yours for any sign of distress.

You sighed, a wave of vulnerability washing over you as you met Paige's gaze. "Yeah, I'm okay. Just... reflecting, I guess," you admitted. "A lot happened at Minnesota, y'know."

You didn't why you were opening up, you hadn't even been drinking that night. It was probably you just needed to talk to someone about it other than your brother or your mom, and Paige was here. She looked confused as she stopped dabbing on your shirt, putting the towel down.

"You wanna talk about it?" Her voice came out soft as she looked into your eyes, and you felt vulnerable but in a good way. You could trust Paige, no matter what.

You hesitated for a moment, feeling a mix of emotions swirling inside you. But something about Paige's comforting presence encouraged you to open up. "It's just... a lot of stuff happened back there," you began, your voice wavering slightly. "I made some mistakes, got caught up in things I shouldn't have."

Paige nodded in understanding, her hand reaching out to squeeze yours reassuringly. "We all make mistakes, Y/N. It's part of growing up," she reassured you, her tone gentle.

"They're mistakes I can never... undo, you know." You were being cryptic for a reason, you didn't wanna tell her straight up. "It's bad," you whispered as Paige shook her head.

"They can't be that bad, I promise you. As long as you didn't end up in jail, you're fine." Paige joked slightly as you sighed, leaning back slightly. Paige's expression flickered back to serious. "Wait did you?"

"No, no." You shook your head quickly. "Something may have happened at a party and I wasn't totally aware of it happening until the next day, and um... well, I just left after."

Paige put two and two together as her eyes widened, squeezing your hand. "Oh shit, Y/N."

"Yeah," you whispered softly.

"I... I'm so sorry that happened," Paige pulled you into a hug as you leaned into her embrace, feeling a mixture of relief wash over you. Her comforting presence offered solace in a moment of vulnerability, and you were grateful for her understanding.

"It's okay," you murmured, your voice muffled against her shoulder. "I've been trying to put it behind me, but it's been tough."

"Who else knows?" Paige asked as she pulled away slightly to meet your eyes.

"Just Bryce and my parents. And now, you." You paused, feeling a weight lifting off your shoulders as you shared this burden with Paige. "I haven't really talked about it with anyone else. It's just... hard, you know?"

Paige nodded, her expression filled with empathy. "Thank you for trusting me with this," she said softly, her hand reaching out to gently brush a strand of hair away from your face.

You gazed into her eyes for a few seconds before averting your gaze, feeling nervous. "But that wasn't the only reason why I left. The people there sucked, they were so close-minded and like... awful,"

Paige nodded, she understood how it was like because she had grown up in that town. "I don't know how you stayed that long," she joked slightly as your lips began to curve up into a smile.

"Yeah, well, I guess I was just trying to fit in," you replied with a wry smile, though there was a hint of bitterness in your tone. "But it's hard to fit in when you don't even belong there."

Paige's expression softened as she finally put two and two together. "I get it. It's tough when you're surrounded by people who don't understand or accept you for who you are."

You swallowed hard, feeling a lump forming in your throat as you struggled to find the right words. "Yeah, exactly. I mean, it's not like I ever really belonged there anyway," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

Paige's gaze held a mixture of understanding and sympathy as she nodded. "Well, you're here now. And you belong here," she reassured you, her tone firm yet gentle. "And if anyone gets that feeling, it's me," she joked as she rose her eyebrows.

You laughed softly as you met her eyes, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. "I'm glad you understand the feeling, then."

Paige gazed back at you, a small smile playing on her lips. She was slightly confused but it didn't even matter, her heart was beating so fast she thought it was about burst. As Paige's heart raced, she found herself drawn to you in a way she hadn't fully realized before.

"Yeah," she murmured softly, her voice barely above a whisper. "I understand more than you know."

Paige's smile widened slightly, her eyes reflecting a warmth that sent a shiver down your spine. You couldn't help but feel drawn to her in that moment, your heart fluttering with an unfamiliar sensation.

Before either of you could say anything else, the bathroom door creaked open, interrupting the moment. Ice's voice broke through the quiet atmosphere, pulling you both back to reality.

"Hey, you two still in here?" Ice called out, oblivious to the tension in the air.

Paige cleared her throat, breaking eye contact with you as she turned towards the door. "Yeah, we'll be out in a sec," she called back, her tone casual. "Are you okay with-"

"Yeah, yeah." You responded as you hopped off the sink, grabbing Paige's wrist as you opened the bathroom door. You met Ice's gaze as she noticed the proximity between you two.

Ice's eyebrows raised slightly in curiosity as she took in the scene before her, but she didn't comment on it. Instead, she offered a small smile before turning to lead the way back to where the rest of the group was gathered. Paige pulled you slightly closer as Ice guided you two back to the group, her hand on your waist as she did so.

Her touch seemed to natural, so casual that you didn't even bat an eye. It was as if you both had done this a thousand times before, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Despite the lingering warmth of her touch, you tried to keep your thoughts from straying too far.

──

Hanging out with Paige became a normal occurrence ─ Paige would always come by your dorm after practice, you'd watch a movie or eat dinner together. And on weekends, you were at her dorm playing Fortnite with her friends.

The more time you spent with Paige, the more you found yourself enjoying her company. Whether it was the easy banter between you two or the comfortable silence that sometimes fell between conversations, being with her felt right.

"You headin' to Paige's tonight?" Bryce called out from the kitchen as you entered it.

You nodded as you grabbed a bite of his sandwich, earning a glare from your brother. "Yep, we're probably gonna go out to eat. You wanna come?"

Bryce gave you a skeptical look, a smirk playing on his lips as he shook his head. "Nah, I don't wanna third wheel."

"What do you mean?" You responded as you mimicked his skeptical look, trying to ignore the warmth in your cheek as he gave you another glance. "She's your best friend."

"Yeah and your girlfriend." Bryce joked as you choked out a nervous laugh, immediately diverting your gaze from his and grabbed your purse. Bryce's teasing hit a nerve, causing your cheeks to flush as you tried to maintain your composure.

"Ha ha, very funny," you retorted, hoping to brush off his comment with a casual tone. "We're just really close, you jealous now?"

Bryce raised an eyebrow, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he ignored your comments. "Sure," he teased, his tone laced with amusement as he watched you squirm slightly under his gaze. "I know you and Paige very well, probably better than you know yourselves-"

"You're so annoying, shut up." You cut him off with a scoff as you began walking toward the door, your cheeks red in embarrassment.

"Hey, I'm just messing with you," he laughed, his tone very amused. "Have fun tonight. And tell Paige I said hi."

"I will, don't worry!''

──

You didn't expect to hear a knock on your door at nearly one in the morning, especially since you had just settled into bed after a long day. Curious, you got up and made your way to the door, wondering who could possibly be visiting at such a late hour.

Opening it, you were surprised to find Paige standing there, exhaustion on her face. "Hey," she greeted softly, her voice barely above a whisper as she sniffled.

She looked up at you with bloodshot eyes before she took in your appearance. "Shit, I'm sorry. Were you asleep-"

"Paige, no it's fine. Are you okay?"

That was all she needed to pull you into a tight embrace, almost knocking the wind out of you. All you did was wrap your arms around her waist as she buried her face in your shoulder, her body trembling slightly. You held her close, feeling her heartbeat against yours, the warmth of her embrace providing some comfort in the darkness of the night.

"It's okay, P," you murmured softly, rubbing her back soothingly as you felt her tension slowly start to ease.

After a few moments, Paige pulled back slightly, gulit on her face. "I'm sorry for showing up like this. I just got home from the game and I didn't realize it was late."

It was slowly adding up as you gave Paige a sympathetic smile. "Don't apologize please, you wanna come in?"

You stepped back to let her in, closing the door behind her as she entered your dorm room. She took a seat on your bed, looking visibly exhausted as she leaned back against the pillows. You followed close behind, leaning back next to her as she sniffled.

"I'm really sorry for waking you up, you were just the first person I thought of." Paige spoke quietly, gulit plaguing her expression. "I shouldn't have, I should've just waited til the morning."

You shook your head gently, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "No, no it's okay. I wasn't even asleep, I swear," you reassured her.

"I know but you have classes tomorrow morning and I should've been-"

"Paige," you interjected sternly as she sighed. "It's okay, I promise. I'm here for you, remember?"

Paige gazed at you as she frowned, feeling the weight of the entire team on her back. She shut her eyes as she sniffled, feeling the tears burn in her eyes as you reassured her. She felt them slowly fall as she sniffled, feeling your gaze soften as you watched her.

"Talk to me, please. Tell me what happened," you whispered gently, reaching out to wipe away her tears with your thumb.

Paige sniffled, leaning into your touch as she let out a shaky breath. "The game went fucking terrible. I played like shit but we kept getting fouled and the ref wouldn't call anything, leaving us at a disadvantage the entire time," she explained, her voice trembling with frustration. "And then, in the last couple minutes, I missed a shot that could've turned the game around. It's like... I let everyone down."

You listened attentively, your heart sinking at the pain evident in Paige's voice. "I'm sorry you had to go through that, P. You're still an amazing player,"

"It just felt like shit, it felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders, and I couldn't handle it," Paige continued as she sniffled again, wiping her tears.

Paige kept venting the entire night and you listened attentively, letting her pour out her heart. Despite the exhaustion you felt, you wanted to be there for Paige like she had done for you multiple times before ─ and of course, you couldn't bear seeing Paige so broken and hurt after a game.

It was around four in the morning when Paige had finally worn herself out, passing out in your bed as you sat beside her, gently stroking her hair as she slept. You couldn't help but feel a deep sense of affection for Paige, admiring her strength and resilience even in moments like these.

You fell asleep a few minutes after her and when she woke up, you were gone, presumably at your lecture. Paige woke up feeling a lot lighter than she had in awhile, knowing that you had been there for her through the night. She glanced around the room, taking in the familiar surroundings of your dorm, feeling a sense of comfort wash over her.

You were such a comfort to her, even the mere thought of you had her smiling. She stayed in your bed for a few minutes, the moments last night replaying in her head; the terrible game and how you had comforted her and let her rant until God knows how late.

Paige didn't know even know where she was going after the game until she had ended up at your doorstep ─ it was subconscious, effortless and almost second nature for her to come to you. The more she thought about you, the more her stomach began flutter and her lips began to curve up into a smile.

Then, her smile dropped. Oh shit, did she like you?

──

"Dude, I told you that was gonna be on the exam, didn't I? Didn't I, P?" Bryce leaned back in his chair before he glanced back at his best friend, who was currently zoning out on her food. "P? Paige, you good?'

"Huh?" Paige finally met his gaze as she nodded, processing his words. "I'm good, sorry uh... what?" She glanced in between Bryce and his teammate, a confused expression on her face.

Bryce sighed as he glared at her. "Oh never mind,"

"Bro, don't never mind me. Come on now, don't act like a twelve year old," Paige mocked as she nudged Bryce playfully with her elbow, earning a groan from her best friend.

Bryce sent her a glare before he continued. "I was just telling him that I said that was gonna be on the exam," he explained as Paige's expression turned more confused. "You don't even know what we're talking about, never mind."

Paige rolled her eyes dramatically. "Oh, I'm sorry, Professor Bryce, I didn't realize we were having a pop quiz in the middle of Chipotle," she teased, earning a laugh from Bryce's teammate.

Bryce chuckled despite himself. "Very funny, Paige. But you might want to pay attention if you don't want to fail your finals."

"Bro, you can't be talking. Where were you last night?" Paige raised her eyebrows as he opened his mouth to speak, only to be cut off by Paige. "Yeah, yeah exactly. You're probably drunk right now,"

"Oh my god, shut up," Bryce rolled his eyes as he shook his head, trying to hide a smirk. "I can't say no to pretty girls, you know this."

"Yeah but you say no to me all the time?" Paige's tone came out annoyed as Bryce sent her a glare.

Bryce scoffed, playfully rolling his eyes. "Pretty is stretching it, buddy. Plus, you're not my type..." He gestured to her Nike tech outfit as she shrugged, taking a sip from her fountain drink.

"You got the ugly genes, so..." The words came out of her mouth before she could process them and as she glanced up to meet Bryce's glare, she knew she messed up. Bryce's teammate just laughed, nodding along to Paige's words only to be met with both their glares.

"Says you, bro. You're uglier," Bryce's words came out stammered as Paige's lips turned upward into a cocky smirk.

"That's not what your sister said," she shrugged as his jaw dropped in shock.

Bryce finally found his voice, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "You... you did not just say that," he muttered, shaking his head in disbelief.

Paige shrugged nonchalantly, taking another sip of her drink. "Hey, don't shoot the messenger," she quipped as she put up her hands in defense.

Bryce's teammate continued to laugh, thoroughly entertained by the exchange. "Man, you two never fail to entertain," he said between laughs.

Despite the initial shock, Bryce couldn't help but chuckle at Paige's boldness. "Alright, alright, you win this round, P," he admitted with a grin. "If only you had a sister, damn it."

Paige just shrugged as she laughed, unable to suppress it any longer. She'd been hanging out too much you to realize how much she actually missed Bryce. However, the new revelation as of this morning made it slightly bittersweet ─ if she began going out with you, everything would change. Would there be anymore banter? Would she have to choose a relationship with you or a friendship with Bryce?

She decided in that moment, she wasn't going to do that to Bryce. He'd been there for her through all her highs and lows, and she couldn't bear to jeopardize their friendship for anything. As much as she might have feelings for you, Paige knew that her bond with Bryce was irreplaceable.

"Hey, P," Bryce's voice interrupted her thoughts, bringing her back to the present moment.

Paige looked up, meeting his gaze with a smile. "Yeah, what's up?"

Bryce smirked as he glanced up from his phone. "You ready to lose at Fortnite later?"

Paige laughed, feeling a sense of relief wash over her. "Oh, it's on. Get ready to get your ass kicked, Brycey boy."

──

The adrenaline from the game was still pumping through Paige's entire body as she walked off the court, feeling like she was on cloud 9. The game had been intense, with both teams giving it their all until the very end. But in the end, it was UConn that came out victorious, thanks in no small part to her incredible performance on the court.

The thrill of victory filled her with an indescribable sense of joy, and she couldn't wipe the smile off her face if she tried and she swore that nothing else could possibly make her happier. Until her gaze met yours, her heart swelling as she read your obnoxious poster.

"No, you fucking didn't," Paige muttered as her grin somehow grew as you laughed.

She recounted the late night conversation where she had told you she's always wanted one of her friends to make a poster for one of her games, and she can't believe you actually had done it for her. In that moment, Paige felt an overwhelming rush of emotions flood through her, filling her heart with warmth and gratitude.

As she made her way over to where you were standing, Paige couldn't help but feel a surge of affection for you. The sight of your familiar smile and the playful look in your eyes made her heart skip a beat, and she couldn't suppress the grin that spread across her face.

"Surprised to see me?" you teased, holding up the poster proudly.

Paige laughed, shaking her head in disbelief as she pulled down the poster so she could embrace you tightly. "Nah, I knew you were here cause I saw your location," she confessed as you laughed. "You're the best, you know that? You made my night,"

"Really? Even after the amazing game you just played?" You smiled, teasing her as you wrapped your arms around her in return.

Paige rolled her eyes, but there was a fondness in her gaze as she looked at you. "Yes, even after the amazing game I just played. You just make everything ten times better, you know that?"

You laughed until you met her gaze, and if this were any other moment, she would have been laughing too. She looked serious though, her eyes scanning your face to take in your reaction.

Paige thought back to lunch with Bryce, how she would never even think about going out his little sister ─ he wouldn't be that mad, right? How could he? You made her feel things she swears she's never felt before, she couldn't ignore the butterflies that fluttered in her stomach or the warmth that spread through her chest.

What if pursuing something more with you ruined the easy dynamic they had? What if it didn't work out and she'd lose both of you? However, all those what if's were thrown out the window as she gazed into your eyes.

"God, you're beautiful." Paige's words came out effortlessly as she pulled you closer. She'd told you plenty of times, but it felt more different now. She was fucking whipped, that's for sure.

You let out a soft laugh at her words, a rush of warmth coursing through your veins. You met her gaze with a mixture of surprise and adoration, her confession caught you off guard.

Paige kept gazing back you, taking in your features as if she were seeing them for the first time, her heart fluttering with excitement. There was something about the way you looked at her, with such warmth and affection, that made her feel like she was the most important person in the world.

In that moment, everything else faded away ─ the doubts, the fears, the uncertainties. Fuck it, she was sure you'd felt the same and if you didn't, she rather that than feel regret.

In an instant, she pushed her lips against yours. You were surprised for a second before you quickly melted into the kiss, the poster falling to the ground as your arms wrapped around her shoulders.

Lost in the heat of the moment, you surrendered to the intoxicating sensation of her lips against yours, the world around you fading into oblivion as you lost yourself in her.

Paige's fingers tangled in your hair, pulling you closer as she deepened the kiss, her lips moving hungrily against yours in a frenzy of desire. Your senses were overwhelmed by the sweet scent of her perfume, and the taste of her lips that sent shivers down your spine.

"Hey, uh Paige?"

You both quickly pulled away as Paige whipped her head toward the voice. Ice and KK were standing there awkwardly as they glanced in between you, embarrassment and amusement on their faces. Paige wiped her lips with the back of her hand as she cleared her throat, sending them a glare as they exchanged glances.

"We just wanted to ask if... uh, you were going to dinner with us?" Ice asked quietly as you avoided their gaze, embarrassment clear in your expression.

"Obviously not, she's gonna be celebrating differently-"

"Shut up, KK." Paige sent her a glare as she giggled, Ice stifling her laughter as Paige looked back at you with a sympathetic smile. "Yeah, we'll go."

We? You smiled softly at the sentiment as KK kept giggling, her laughter echoing in the hallway. Paige glanced at you for affirmation as you nodded slowly, warmth filling her gaze as she nodded back at her friends.

Ice and KK exchanged a knowing look, their amusement evident as they tried to suppress their laughter. "Great! Y'all can come like... whenever. Sorry for interuppting," Ice said, her voice tinged with amusement.

"Are you, really?" Paige mumbled as KK let out another laugh.

"Someone's sassy tonight, ooo." KK joked as her and Ice began walking away, their laughter trailing behind them as they disappeared down the hallway. Paige rolled her eyes playfully at KK's comment, her lips quirking up into a smirk.

"Well, that was unexpected," you remarked with a chuckle.

Paige nodded, a grin spreading across her face. "Yeah, but you know what? I don't even care. I'm just... so happy right now,"

Her enthusiasm was contagious, and you found yourself grinning in response. "Me too," you admitted, unable to hide the warmth in your voice as you met her gaze.

Everything else was put in the back-burner and right now, it was just the two of you. The noise of the hallway, the hustle and bustle of campus life ─ all of it melted away, leaving just the two of you in your own little world.

After dinner, Paige drove you back to your dorm since it wasn't too far from the restaurant. It went well, you were pretty much friends with the entire team and it felt like your own special night too. And in some ways, it was. Paige's hands didn't leave your body the entire night, it was obvious something had shifted in the dynamic ─ however, it wasn't too much of a difference since she'd always been touchy with you.

As Paige parked the car outside your dorm, the atmosphere between you was charged with a new sense of intimacy. You lingered for a moment, neither of you eager to end the evening just yet.

"Thank you for tonight," you said, breaking the silence that had settled between you. "It was really fun."

Paige smiled warmly, her eyes shining with affection. "No, thank you," she replied softly. "For being you, for being here with me, for everything."

You felt a rush of warmth flood through you at her words, a sense of gratitude for the connection you shared with her. In that moment, you realized just how much Paige meant to you, how much her presence brightened your life in ways you couldn't even begin to describe. And how you couldn't even imagine a time when you weren't close with her, where she wasn't your conscious thought.

Without hesitation, you leaned in closer, your heart pounding with anticipation. Paige mirrored your movements, closing the distance between you until your lips met in a soft kiss.

As you pulled away, breathless and exhilarated, you found yourself lost in Paige's gaze. "I like you,"

You let out a breathless laugh at Paige's words, her kiss still lingering on your lips as you smiled. "Oh really? Couldn't tell,"

"Shut up," Paige laughed as she shook her head, her laughter filling the air with warmth and affection.

"I'm serious," Paige insisted, her expression softening as she gazed at you with unwavering sincerity. "I really do like you, more than I've ever liked anyone before."

You wanted to joke but you just couldn't, your heart beginning to race. "I like you too, P," you admitted, your voice filled with warmth and affection. "More than I ever thought possible."

You left the car after a few more passionate kisses, Paige's mind buzzing with pure excitement. As she began driving out of the parking lot, she felt her phone buzz and she quickly answered it.

"Hey, P, you still coming over to play some Fort?" Bryce's voice echoed through the speaker as her heart dropped. She glanced at the time before cursing under her breathe. "Jeez, did I catch you at a bad time?"

He let out a laugh as Paige joined him awkwardly, "Uh no, just kinda forgot. We just had dinner and I'm kinda tired."

"Bro, I have Redbulls and some beers in the fridge. Unless you're with a girl than you have no excuse," Bryce teased, his voice laced with amusement.

"Fine," Paige mumbled as she shut her eyes for second, before refocusing on the road. "I'll be there in 10,"

"Awesome, can't wait. Wait, can you get some pizza on the way I'm hungry," Bryce yawned as Paige's lips quirked up into an amused smile, shaking her head at her best friend's antics.

"Fatass," she joked before sighing, gulit tugging at her. "Fine, okay. I guess I'll be there a little later then."

"Great, see ya in a bit, P."

As she gathered her thoughts and prepared to head over to Bryce's place, Paige couldn't shake off the nagging feeling of guilt that settled in the pit of her stomach. But for now, she pushed those thoughts aside, focusing instead on being there for his friend and enjoying their time together, just like normal.

She then decided that, what he didn't know couldn't hurt him. Paige found herself more determined to bury those doubts deep down inside. She couldn't risk jeopardizing her friendship with Bryce, not when it meant so much to her. And if keeping her relationship with you a secret was what it took to preserve that bond, then so be it.

──

"Paige," you laughed quietly as her hand kept inching up your thigh, embarrassment in your expression as you sent her a warning glare. Everyone's attention was toward the current basketball game that was happening, but Paige seemed more interested in teasing you than paying attention to her best friend's game.

You couldn't help but squirm uncomfortably in your seat, shooting her a warning glare in a futile attempt to deter her advances. "What? No one's looking," she gave you a smile as you sighed, your heart beginning to beat out of your chest.

Despite your initial annoyance, you couldn't deny the thrill that coursed through you at her touch, the heat of her hand sending shivers down your spine.

"Oh, don't tell me you're nervous. Aww, you're nervous?" Paige's lips were close to your ear, her breath warm against your skin as she teased you.

"I'm not nervous," you protested weakly, though the rapid beating of your heart betrayed your words.

Paige chuckled softly, her hand still resting on your thigh as she leaned in closer, her lips hovering just inches away from yours. "Sure you're not," she whispered, her voice playful and teasing.

Paige swiftly turned her head toward the game before anything else could happen, annoyance filling your veins as you shook your head. Paige was having too much with this whole arrangement ─ practically everyone knew you were a thing at this point (well, with the exception of your brother and her best friend).

Paige loved teasing you, it was a part of what drew you to her. The way she could effortlessly lighten the mood and bring a smile to your face even in the most mundane of moments.

After the game had ended, Paige led you through the crowds as you looked for Bryce. Her hand was clasping yours tightly, not really caring who was looking as you navigated through the crowd.

Finally spotting Bryce amidst the crowd, you felt a surge of relief wash over you. With a smile, Paige led you towards him, her hand naturally pulling you toward him.

"B!" Paige called out, her voice cutting through the noise of the crowd as she waved to get his attention.

Bryce turned towards you, a smile lighting up his face as he caught sight of the two of you approaching. "Jeez, there you are! Took you long enough," he teased, his tone lighthearted as always. His gaze slowly dropped to your hands before you quickly pulled out of her grasp, nervousness etching your features.

"It was a big crowd, she was gonna get lost," Paige spoke quickly, her words tumbling out in an attempt to diffuse the tension. She shot you a reassuring glance, her eyes filled with understanding and empathy.

He looked at you two with a confused expression. "O-kay, whatever. You guys wanna go get food then head home, I'm starving." He looped an arm around both of you, pulling you into a tight embrace as he started leading the way through the crowd.

You and Paige exchanged a quick glance, a silent understanding passing between you as you fell into step beside Bryce. His demeanor helped to lighten the mood, and soon enough, the awkwardness of the earlier moment began to fade away.

After they'd gotten food and dropped you off at your dorm, Paige and Bryce began to walk to her dorm. There was silence between them for the first time in the night and Paige couldn't help but feel

A sense of unease settle in the pit of her stomach. She glanced over at Bryce, noticing the furrowed brow and distant expression on his face. It was clear that he was lost in thought, his mind preoccupied with something weighing on him.

"Hey, you okay?" Paige asked softly, her voice filled with concern as she reached out to gently squeeze Bryce's arm.

Bryce glanced back at Paige with a sigh, his expression turning annoyed. "Do you think I'm stupid?"

Paige looked taken aback as she scoffed, "What do you mean by that?"

Bryce let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair as he averted his gaze. "Bro, I know you and Y/N better than you know yourselves. You're both my family, you think I wouldn't notice you two are hooking up or something? It's kinda insulting, Paige."

The way he said her name made her stomach squeeze in discomfort, and Paige felt a pang of guilt at Bryce's words. "You're angry?"

"Angry isn't the word for it," Bryce sighed, his frustration visibly melting away as he looked back at Paige. "Seeing my sister and my best friend keep something from me isn't fun, like at all."

"I know, Bryce," Paige said earnestly, her gaze filled with remorse. "I'm really sorry. I should have been honest with you from the beginning."

"Did you think I would like, freak out or something?" Bryce's words came out quiet as he studied Paige's expression, searching for some explanation behind her hesitation to confide in him. "Because I wouldn't, Paige. I want you to be happy, you know that."

Paige shook her head, her expression filled with regret. "No, it's not that, Bryce," she replied softly. "I was just... scared, I guess. Scared of how you might react, scared of what it might mean for our friendship."

Bryce sighed, reaching out to give Paige's hand a reassuring squeeze. "Hey, you don't have to be scared, P," he said gently. "Whatever makes you two happy, makes me happy too. It's honestly kinda great, cause like... I've always said that you're my sister and now that you're dating my sister, you're my sister-in-law so basically, we're related."

Paige couldn't help but snort at Bryce's ramble, shaking her head. "We're not dating," the words came out of her mouth before she could really process them.

Bryce's expression turned into surprise. "Wait what? Why not?"

Paige shifted underneath his gaze, uncertainty in her expression. "I guess it was too official, you know? I needed to tell you first, to get your stamp of approval."

"That's kinda thoughtful," Bryce's expression was confused before he smiled. "Alright, okay. I give you permission to ask out my little sister,"

"I never said permission, I said approval. You're making me sound like a pussy, B." Paige joked as Bryce sent her a glare.

"Same thing,"

"Not really," Paige felt his glare on her cheek before she laughed. "Fine, Brycey, you win."

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

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honkaimethrail · 2 days

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Aventurine dating headcanons (part 1)

Nsfw under cut!

sfw

Contrary to what a lot of fans believe, I don't believe Aventurine would spend a lot of money frivolously on the person he loves

Forming connections with people, letting them use him as much as he benefits from them, is a talent Aventurine honed and polished as years grew by, letting it come naturally to him. If you were just normal friends, he would willingly hand out thousands of credits to you, simply replying to your surprised expression with a chuckle.

He is well-aware of his power and status as one of the 10 Stonehearts of the IPC, but Aventurine's actual self-worth is in shambles. The first time, you actually do something nice for him out of pure goodwill, you'll immediately recieve a few thousand credits as a "meagre" thanks. He's seen these genuine gestures in movies, but Aventurine cannot bring himself to believe someone would do it for him.

Anywayss, on to the dating part! I hope you're patient because it would take a LOT of time before you're actually close. You will learn about him, gradually, but it will be slow.

Which is why there won't be a difference when you first start dating him, with the exception of your relationship being strictly hidden, Aventurine is a private man after all, and he was already taking a big gamble as it is by dating the person who has his heart.

I personally hc him as someone who's attracted to a person who has the freedom to make their own choices, more of an explorer. Which is why he's more likely to fall for a Nameless! Reader than one of the IPC workers.

One of the easiest ways to get close to him is by texts and calls. The amount of texts you'll recieve will increase two-fold, with your conversations ranging from your work, friends to miniscule details, your habits, his habits, multiple promises on your side to visit different views with him by your side, and silences on his end, before changing the topic. In Aventurine's defense, he gets sentimental at night, you only laugh in return and immediately, Aventurine feels his heart leap in his chest.

Physical affection is alien to him. Aventurine has had experience, no doubt, but none of them felt as real as with you. He's lowkey scared of the person he will become if he comes to reciprocate your touches, or even encourage them,so you'll have to be patient, he's trying his best to accomodate you in his world.

It will take a long time for Aventurine to kiss you but that's fine, because he secretly feels himself bursting with adoration when you intertwine your fingers with his, brush his hair, or trace along the length of his nose with your index finger. He's a goner, he's much more in love than he believed and Aventurine unfortunately knows that.

nsfw

It's not that Aventurine would say NO to you if you imply to do anything sexual, he's had experience of course, but he would blank out during the experience. It would make hin feel even more shitty because he's doing it with you. Memories of his past experiences would swirl in his head and he would become instantly naseous seeing you beneath him. Needless to say, you learned sexual intimacy is something that will take time do it again.

Aventurine views sex as a tool, something that either has to be simply released, or used as a chip in his plan. He loves you, loves you a lot, and the idea of sex between lovers, being much more than two bodies would take a while to settle in his head. His mind would keep alternating between his past exploitative partners, to the current you, feeling all the more disgusted with comparing you to them.

So you both take your time. Make out with each, kiss his face, hands, and reverently tell him things that you would do to him once you have the chance to properly make love again. It will melt Aventurine to bits, but he's also assured that doing it with you will be different.

"It will be amazing. To feel a part of you connected with me, I want to see you make the most wonderful expressions, Kakavasha. I want to see your face when you c-

"I-I get it! You're enjoying this, aren't you? "

When it finally happens, Aventurine is absolutely moved. Sex finally became something that felt comforting and good to him, and he makes sure you know that with how vocal he is (someone posted aventurine moaning on yt and it's... without context it's... Open to misinterpretation.)

I don't headcanon him as having a high sex drive, it's fairly moderate, or maybe higher than average when he's around you but that's about it.

Sexting happens more often than you think. A lot of times you both are unable to be with each other because of work, which is why it's time for Aventurine to whip out a handy tool called a phone to see your face, and in much more needy times, use your voice to gently coax him to orgasm, which he gladly does too in return.

Imo, he's a switch, but a prefers bottoming. Can easily top too but i dont think he would prefer to be a hard dom. That's just not his thing.

After the first time you had sex, Aventurine was honestly quite surprised. At himself. He becomes much more needy at the prospect of being so close, with you, turning putty into your touch. He's easier to turn-on, and slowly it becomes a challenge at times to see who breaks first.

(To be continued because this was accidentally posted lmao)

#aventurine x reader #honkai star rail #aventurine #hsr #hsr aventurine #aventurine fluff #hsr aventurine x reader #aventurine honkai star rail #aventurine smut #/reader #x reader

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saetoshis · 2 days

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꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ LET'S PLAY A GAME | kny headcanons

⋆୨୧˚ WITH: sanemi ; giyuu ; tengen ; kyojuro ; obanai

⋆୨୧˚ SUMMARY: how much do they like to tease you?

⋆୨୧˚ MATURE CONTENT WARNINGS:

fem reader, teasing/begging, pet names [pretty girl, baby], orgasm control, mentions of dacryphilia, mentions of restraint/bondage, MDNI

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ SANEMI: 10/10

sanemi lives to see you yearning for his touch. he just can't get enough of your little whines and pleads for his hands on you, and the way you paw at the bulge in his pants so desperately makes his every muscle tense up in anticipation - but his favorite part is seeing just how far he can push you.

"what's that, pretty girl? you want what?" sanemi sneers, knowing fully well what you just said but he just can't help playing dumb to see how sexually frustrated you can get. he kneels over where you're laying, a hand palming the bulge in his pants nonchalantly. "this? this what you want? hm?"

"yes, please, seriously," you whine out between heaved breaths, your flushed aura making you hot and a bit irritated from how much he's withholding you. your fingers flit over your panties, finding your clit in an attempt to appease the high tension building in your body. "can't take it anymore... please, just give it to me."

"well, since you asked so nicely," sanemi jeers as he slips his pants just beyond his hips, his cock pressing against your twitching, achy clit. he lets out little grunted breaths as he rocks his hips, head catching against your sensitive nerves again and again. he can see the dissent on your face when you realize he's not slipping in anytime soon.

"what's that look, huh?" sanemi feigns innocence, adoring the way you pout and whine at him, begging so desperately to be filled up the way you want to. he sneers between a tantalizing smile, "beg me a few more times n' i'll think about it."

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ GIYUU: 3/10

giyuu doesn't instinctively lean towards withholding himself from you, and he's never really thought about the idea of seeing you beg for him. he's not too keen with the notion of beating around the bush, as it were - and yet, all it takes is your demeanor all needy and pliable in his lap with pleads falling from your lips for his mind to wander.

"can't help it, just so horny..." you mutter through little panted breaths, letting your hips grind and roll against his clothed cock in tandem with the rise and fall of your chest. you feel giyuu's fingers flit against your thighs as his eyes wander across your frame, all until he pulls away, unusually. your eyes flicker up at his expression, and all you can pronounce is a little, "huh?"

"wanna see you do it yourself," giyuu murmurs under his breath, his pants feeling stiffer underneath where you're sitting so prettily for him. he wants to fuck you - bad, but right now he wants to see how far he can take it before you fall apart into pieces. with a little push of his hips up against you, he leers, "i know you want to."

you feel a sliver of tingles down your spine at the change in his demeanor, and your hips almost start rutting on their own. every time you make eye contact with him, you're met with a stern gaze - who would've known this side of him could turn you on so much? your voice comes out in a whimper as you let your now-wet panties grind against his bulge, "i'll do anything if you just touch me, please. fuck me- hah, can't take it."

maybe it's the way you finally look so desperate, so messy, flushed, and shuddering on his lap that causes him to finally give in - and when he does, you're really in for it.

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ TENGEN: 11/10

tengen lives to see you a whining, teary-eyed mess just for him. he'll do anything to see you shudder, to feel you getting wetter from just one look, to even hear your pleads become more and more broken and whimpered. he just can't help but enjoy it even when you hop on top of him in attempt to get back at him.

"what's this, huh?" tengen sneers as he watches the little determined look on your face as you sink down onto his cock, refusing to move in efforts to give him a taste of his own medicine. he lets out a little chuckle at the way you cross your arms all serious and tough-like. he lets his hands glide along your hips, "really...? is this a punishment or something?"

"mhm," you hum with a nod, trying to ignore the fact that the head of his cock is poking up right against that spot that makes your knees weaken. you keep your resolve, occasionally grinding your hips to see how he reacts - maybe he'll jolt, let out a little moan - but he doesn't, and you start to feel a little discouraged. you drag your hands along his chest and his abs, pressing kisses against his neck in a desperate attempt.

"feels good, doesn't it? my cock all pushed inside you like this," tengen murmurs against your ear, his voice sending a shudder down your spine and you tighten around him just enough for him to know he's affecting you. his hands caress your waist, your back, your hips - he knows it's working, and that's pissing you off even more. "you can lemme have just a little, can't you, baby?"

it only takes a few more sickly sweet whispers from tengen's lips for him to have you bouncing on his lap, mind boggled as slick smothers messily around his shaft. maybe next time you'll try something different to tease him with.

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ KYOJURO: 7/10

kyojuro oftentimes likes to give you what you want, as you properly deserve - although, the same can't always be said for him in bed. it's like a switch flips, and all he can desire and cultivate are those little whiny moans pleading for him to just 'keep going, don't stop.'

"don't stop what?" kyojuro murmurs with a little smirk on his face and slick covering his fingers and palm. his thumb nudges your clit ever so gently, his fingers finding their way to his tongue to clean off the mess that you've already made of them. he watches your hips jolt in desperation, and he chuckles softly in that innocent manner he always does. "need it that much, do you?"

you let out a little groan of dissent, rocking your hips in an attempt to get his thumb to circle your clit a little faster - just at least a little. he sees the way your muscles shudder in anticipation, and maybe he feels he's been a bit mean. with a little murmur of 'this what you want? here?' and his fist around his cock, he finally presses between your walls with a stifled grunt, "that's it, isn't it? right there..."

"yes, yes, fu- yes," you practically whimper, feeling elation coursing through your every nerve as he rocks his hips slowly, intentionally. each press of his cock fills the hilt of your cunt and you can feel your sanity draining each time he ruts forwards. faster, then faster, even faster still, your consciousness fades just as fast as your orgasm builds. "f-feels so good, fuck."

kyojuro lets out a chuckled sneer as he caresses your cheek, hips rocking hard against yours. "feels better after being patient, doesn't it? maybe i'll have to tease you more often."

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ OBANAI: 6/10

teasing manifests for obanai as more of a power play than anything else. his whims aren't always consistent; sometimes he'll make you touch yourself without his help at all, other times he'll keep your hands restrained so there's no way you could even help yourself if you wanted to. but this time, it's a bit different.

"shh, shh... what did i say? wait," obanai murmurs lowly as his fingers curl intentionally against that spot that makes you feel like you're falling apart at the seams. his other hand finds your clit, circling it in tandem with each press of his fingers inside of you. you shudder desperately beneath him, voice coming out in hitched mews. obanai repeats himself, "no cumming 'til i say so."

you nod your head in obedience weakly, finding it harder and harder to fight the jolts of pleasure wracking your limbs. each aching curl of his digits makes your whole spine tingle, and you use all of your strength to hold back. that is, until he swaps his fingers for the hard cock in his fist. "please..."

"please, what? i told you," obanai lets out a hitched breath as he slips himself between your walls, finding your saccharine, desperate pussy an immediate relief for the unforgiving throb in his cock. he pushes your thighs apart and watches you shiver, curling over you broodingly, "no cumming 'til i say so."

you hold onto your sanity for dear life, but the wet smacks and lewd moans filling the room are enough for you to teeter over the edge of oblivion. you're lucky that obanai is right there with you, gripping your waist and fucking into you with a wanton need - it seems this time you'll just barely make it in time.

SAETOSHIS 2024. do not copy/repost.

tagging: @suyacho

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starlostseungmin · 3 days

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husband!jeongin

✰ notes: this is 2 days late but jeongin’s here!! thank you so much to that jeongin biased anon who read my husband minho headcanon and for giving me this idea!! i appreciate you so much <33 not proofread. DO NOT FORGET TO REBLOG, COMMENT AND LEAVE TAGS! thank you <33

ꔛ

Husband Jeongin who tripped when he got down on one knee just to propose. You laughed at him but said yes at the end. He got embarrassed so you gave him the sweetest kiss on the lips which he gladly returned passionately.

Husband Jeongin whose Hyungs got emotional the moment he’s officially married. Chan and Hyunjin cried the most.

Husband Jeongin who got a full sponsor from Chan throughout your wedding to your honeymoon because he was generous and loves to spoil Jeongin. You too.

Husband Jeongin who is clumsy and gives you secondhand embarrassment but the amount of love still remains. He tripped at the bowling alley after rolling the ball on your date. Not once but twice.

Husband Jeongin whose idea of dates consists of watching movies at the cinema, shopping, eating at your favorite restaurants, and spontaneous travels.

Husband Jeongin who scams you with his cuteness just to make you buy him some stuff, especially his type of shoes and he feels like he’s on top of the world when you do. He goes for the weird ones with style.

Husband Jeongin who buys you your favorite albums even though he jokes around that you’re cheating on him with another group rather than his own.

Husband Jeongin who loves shopping and stealing kisses inside the fitting room cubicles while you are changing. You weren’t used to it as it leaves a blush on your cheeks.

Husband Jeongin who loves taking selfies with you. In this marriage, you are the photographer and he’s the model but at the same time, he loves taking pictures of you, especially candid ones.

Husband Jeongin who loves food, and rates them with you based on their tastes.

Husband Jeongin who takes you out on a night stroll while eating ice cream you two bought from the convenience store nearby.

Husband Jeongin who is the reason for your cuteness aggression that makes you want to smooch and cuddle him all day. He can’t resist any physical touch from you anyway.

Husband Jeongin who can’t cook to save his life so you taught him how to yet still fails. You both just laugh it off.

Husband Jeongin who respects your beliefs and never judges them.

Husband Jeongin whose love languages are gift-giving, quality time, and physical touch.

Husband Jeongin who lets you sleep on his shoulder, on his lap, or just use his body as your pillow. He doesn’t mind and doesn’t say anything but initiates cuddles to make you more comfortable.

Husband Jeongin who gets angry when someone upsets you and is the type of person to do something back so no one could touch you again.

Husband Jeongin who can’t keep up for a long time being not okay with you after an argument and proceeds to apologizeーhugging you tenderly as he whispers that he loves you.

Husband Jeongin who doesn’t want to be away from you for a long time and misses you the most when he goes abroad to work. He’ll call you when he gets to the airport or when he’s not busy.

Husband Jeongin who loves kids but doesn’t pressure you to have one with him.

Husband Jeongin who tries his hardest in this relationship to give you the love you deserve but you insist that he doesn’t need to put in a lot of effort because he is already enough and the heartwarming things he does with you are considered as reassurance.

Husband Jeongin who is a baby and still a baby for you even if he insists that he’s already a grown-up. His Hyungs would argue otherwise.

Husband Jeongin who has a precious smile and adorable laugh. He has a lot of cute sides and whines like a kid in a good and acceptable manner.

Husband Jeongin who is always true about his feelings for you and never lies.

Husband Jeongin whom you love the most in the world and swore you’ll protect him at any cost.

Husband Jeongin who promised to love you forever and never hurt you which you’d do too.

✰ taglist: @notastraykid , @ameliesaysshoo , @l3visbby , @reignessance , @lix-ables , @skzfelixlove , @rachabreathing , @hyunverse , @minluvly , @sleepyleeji , @starseungs , @midsoulz , @oddracha , @armystay89

©️ 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐌𝐈𝐍 , 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒.

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reilemon · 2 days

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💫Xavier, Xavier, Xavier...💫

♡︎synopsis: Xavier shows you what happens when you push your luck.

♡︎pairing: Xavier x fem!reader

｡°⚠︎°｡MINORS DNI (18+ ONLY)｡°⚠︎°｡

♡︎cw: established relationship, edging, orgasm denial, oral sex (both male and female receiving), fingering, creampie, pet names

♡︎word count: 2.1k

♡︎a/n: Okay, it starts when MC falls onto the sofa and Xavier asks 'what's your answer'. Although I love how MC reassures him after, I changed some stuff between that moment and the doorbell, to set the tone for the rest of the fic 🤭.

♡︎ special thanks to my beta reader ♡︎@its-de♡︎ for reading and helping me with this!

divider by @cafekitsune

The back of your knees hit the sofa making you plop down onto the couch.

Xavier cages you in with his legs on either side of yours, his hands resting on the back and armrest. "So, what's your answer?"

You grin in amusement. He's so cute (and hot) when he gets jealous. You squish his pillowy cheeks "Are you jealous?"

He averts his gaze, pouting. "No."

You can't deny how attractive he looked just now as he basically cornered you onto the couch with the raised eyebrow, the intense gaze as he towered over you.

You did get a feeling that you may have talked about Lumiere too much, and this merch unpacking didn't help. Still, you want to tease him more. Because he's being ridiculous and he should know that all of you belongs to him - Xavier.

You check the time on the digital watch in the distance. You should have around four, five minutes. Biting back a mischievous grin, you look up at him with innocent eyes as your hands wander from his cheeks, down over his torso to slowly stroke the front of his pants. "I've been talking about Lumiere too much, have I?"

His breath hitches as he watches you unbutton his pants.

"Let me make it up to you." You free his already hard dick. You always make him worked up so easily. Your tongue slides from the base towards the tip, your mouth giving the cockhead attention while your hand strokes the rest of his length.

Xavier's hand rests on your head, and he's resisting the urge to buck his hips, to feel more of your delicious mouth.

He pants "You still haven't -"

The doorbell rings.

He completely forgot about the delivery that was on the way.

You take the chance of momentarily distraction and pull away. "We can't keep the delivery guy waiting."

Disbelief written all over his face, he grabs you by the chin. "Nope. I still haven't heard the answer I want."

You swat away his hand and you squeeze through between him and the couch, rushing towards the door. You chime over your shoulder "I'm the injured one here, Lumi - I mean, Xavier!" And you can't help a sly smile that creeps up on your lips when you're away from his eyesight.

Xavier heard that nice and clear as he zipped up his pants. You're so paying for that later.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

The rest of the days of your recovery are the same - uneventful. You had the checkup, leveled up in the game, watched more movies and TV shows, ate those healthy porridges and Xavier's questionable smoothies. The new Lumiere merch and your occasional teasing of Xavier made this mundane routine more exciting. You had the ‘girlfriend in recovery’ immunity, so you made good use of it. You would either "accidentally" refer to him as Lumiere, or you'd keep suggesting to him to wear the costume once you're fully recovered.

You adored seeing his pouts, and you couldn't help but feel excited when he's jealous, especially when you remember that one night in the club bathroom*.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

Couple of days pass since your full recovery and return to work. Both you and Xavier were too busy while getting back on track with everything, but tonight you finally have time for each other.

Finally.

You're aching for his touch. He didn't want to do anything while he was your caregiver, even though you insisted that you're fine. You did tease him that time when he was wearing the Lumiere costume, but he didn't mention it later and neither did you.

As much as you complained about that "mundane routine", you missed it now that your schedule is hectic again, so you decided to invite Xavier for a movie night. You're going to watch an old movie "The Mask of Zorro" and eat dinner that already arrived. You change into pajama shorts and your favorite Xavier's hoodie that you stole.

A few minutes later the doorbell rings, so you answer it - and you almost squeal in excitement when you see Xavier in Lumiere outfit at your doorstep.

He decided to wear this since you already bought it for him, and because he did feel silly for feeling jealous of his own persona. Seeing your enthusiasm makes him amused and glad that he indulged you.

And he ignores the jealous feeling creeping up in his chest again.

He steps in and greets you by taking your hand a planting a soft kiss on top of it. Then he pulls you by the waist and gives your lips a gentle peck.

You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him into a deeper kiss. You pull away with a smile, your finger dangling the ear cuff "Let's go to the bedroom."

"I thought you invited me for dinner?"

"That can wait."

Xavier chuckles and lifts you up princess style and walks towards the bedroom, as you kiss and lick his sensitive neck.

When he softly places you on the bed, you immediately sit up to the edge, his crotch right in front of you. You sweetly look up at him as your hand strokes over his clothed member “I think I owe you something, Lumiere.”

Lumie- Xavier’s jaw clenches. He takes a deep breath and his gloved hand catches you wrist. “Lumiere, huh?”

That sly grin threatens to tug at your lips. Oh, this is going to be good. You give him your best innocent pout and angelic doe eyes, acting oblivious.

Letting go of your wrist, he takes off your hoodie, revealing you’re wearing nothing underneath, your breasts bare and already nipples perked up. He kneels in front of you, one gloved hand groping one while his mouth gives attention to the other one, gently kissing and sucking sensitive the nipple. Shortly after, you lie down, resting on your elbows, as he takes off your shorts and panties together.

With his teeth, he removes a glove from one hand and offers you his two middle fingers which you take into your mouth, sucking on them, tongue swirling, generously coating them. Breaking the string of saliva between your lips and his digits, with feather-like touch, he grazes between your lower lips, his eyes hungrily eyeing your pussy that is already glistening with arousal.

You swallow an impatient moan, but you subtly wiggle your hips, urging him to press harder.

"So impatient." He chuckles and stills your hips with his other hand, the leather glove providing a new and exciting sensation. You jolt as his fingers suddenly press your clit, rubbing it in painfully slow motion, but you can't move your hips to stimulate yourself more, your small whines showing your frustration.

"What is it, princess?" Xavier innocently asks. "Don't you like it when I’m gentle?"

A sigh leaves your lips. "I do... Lumiere. You're so gentle and sweet." As much as you want to beg for him to touch you more, take you right now, you want to provoke him even more.

So he continues with the teasing - grazing your clit, going around your dripping entrance for a few more minutes before finally slipping one finger inside, a moan slipping from your lips, making his hard cock twitch. He slips it in and out a few times before the second finger joins. The front of his pants is becoming unbearably tight as he listens to your beautiful moans when his finger curl hitting that sweet spot inside you, his mouth salivating at the sight of your wet pussy being finger fucked by him, so he latches his lips onto your bundle of nerves.

Your eyes roll back as he does so, your hand finding purchase in his fluffy hair, but you still can't move your hips as he is firmly holding you, his hand pressing your lower belly. He got you so worked up with all the teasing that you're starting to feel the heat pooling in your pussy, your leg muscles twitching as you try to meet the thrusts of his fingers.

You only manage to whisper Lumi-, before suddenly both his fingers and lips pull away, a frustrated whine leaving your lips as you were so close to cumming.

Xavier gives you a self-satisfied smirk "I'm just taking it nice and slow with my princess." and then he pushes you further onto the bed and flips you over on your stomach, propping your ass up. He silently sighs in relief behind you as he unzips and frees his throbbing cock.

You arch your back as you feel the cockhead swiping between your folds, and just when you're about to move, that gloved hand stops you by your lower back. You bite the pillow in annoyance and let him take his sweet time, the tip teasingly slipping in and out.

He bends your leg, spreading you out more for him, and lies down on top of you, his clothed body putting oppressing weight on top of your completely naked form. His hot breath tickles your ear and the gloved hand wraps around your neck, making you look up at him "Were you gonna say something, bunny?"

Your pussy flutters around his tip, and you open your mouth to beg him to just fuck you, to let you cum, but you stay silent and swallow thickly, and you only shake your head.

He hums in amusement and lets go of your neck to prop his weight on his hands as he starts moving his hips. With shallow thrusts he slowly eases himself inside you, he lets out a choked groan as your walls clench around him when he bottoms out.

You mewl into the pillow as his hips roll at a languid pace, and you flinch when his fingers find your clit, pinching it and rubbing small circles. You can move your hips now, but he's set on being "gentle" and all you can do is whine and moan underneath him as his slow strokes make you cream around his cock, the delayed orgasm flaring up again.

(Un)fortunately for you, Xavier knows your body too well, and just as you thought you could cum without a warning, he completely pulls out and his hand leaves your tender bud.

You groan into the pillow "Xavier!"

"Oh?" his voice is clear and composed, but you don't see him shutting his eyes as he's squeezing his tip with his hand. In a few seconds he calms down and leans over you, whispering in your ear "I thought you wanted Lumiere... "

You were so desperate to cum you didn't notice that you dropped your sweet innocent act.

He flips you on your back, pushing your legs up by the back of your knees, with his heavy cock just resting between your swollen folds.

He swats away your hand when you reach down to put it back inside, but presses his thumb on your needy clit, making you squirm at the contact.

“Please…” You pant.

“Hm?” He cocks an eyebrow “Who are you talking to, my little bunny?”

You whimper as your bud is neglected yet again “Xavier… Just fuck m- !” You don’t finish the sentence and Xavier completely buries his dick inside, then pulling back almost completely before shoving it back inside, and you cry out in pleasure as his cock pounds into you with the vigorous pace that you desperately needed.

The heat rushes through your body, head dizzy, but you muster enough strength to sit up and grab Xavier by the back of his neck, slipping off the ear cuff, wrapping your arms and legs around him, needing to feel his whole weight on top of you as he mercilessly pounds into you.

His hips falter for a moment, but he continues at the same pace - angling his hips to keep hitting your sensitive spot while his pelvis slaps against your swollen pearl. His arms wrap around your torso and he pulls you into a sloppy, wet kiss.

Right before the waves of your orgasm overtake you pant Xavier, Xavier, Xavier against his lips, and with your pulsing walls around his girth, he thrusts deep inside, filling up your pussy as he moans my love in your ear.

The two of you lie there, wrapped into each other’s arms, your face nuzzled into the crook of his neck, hips still moving to help the other come down from their high.

When he pulls out, you notice your mixed fluids all over his white pants. “I think those pants are ruined.” You comment and then your eyes squint at him “Was that your plan all along?”

He avoids your gaze, impish smile on his lips. “Maybe.”

*Passion Star Martini - upcoming fic

#love and deepspace #xavier x reader #xavier smut #xavier love and deepspace #love and deepspace xavier #love and deepspace smut #lads x reader #lads xavier #lads smut

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fraugwinska · 2 days

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Our lovely couple moves in together... Smut ahead - Minors DNI - Adult themes!

"Last chance to change your mind, cher."

You cocked your brow with that sweet smile you always had when looking at him, a small box in your hand. Alastor stood at the front doors of his townhouse, his arms crossed and leaning against the door frame, returning your grin with an even wider one.

"You know me long enough to know I am not one to take back my word, love. My house is yours from this day on forward."

With the flick of his wrist, he summoned various of his voodoo minions, who all immediately sprung into action, one of them taking the box out of your hand while the others crept to the waiting car with the few belongings in boxes you had accumulated over the past years. Most of them were books you could hardly part with, an antique room screen you got as a gift from Zestial. Your office, mostly, folders and folders of your articles, the polished black typewriter you loved. A vintage, cherry-wood cathedral radio - Alastor's gift to celebrate your three year anniversary. It's been about nine, now. Nine incredible, enchanting, magical, horrific, terrible and utterly love-filled, chaotic and passionate and simply hellbent and haphazardous years. Nine years, in which Hell came truly alive for you. Nine years, and finally one step further. Moving in together.

He watched as the final helper sprung inside to sit at the steering wheel of the car to drive it back to the rental, his arms still crossed. You tried hard to find the catch, but it seemed that Alastor simply wanted this, just as much as you did. No trickery, no traps, nothing. Just him, and you, together in his treasured house. Well. Mostly.

Though you've not met her yet, you knew about Niffty - a young, new sinner Alastor took under his wings. Whether he made a deal with her, or simply hired her, you didn't know, and you didn't really care, but she would also be at his house, he had told you, as a live-in maid/housekeeper. And because he was a gentleman of his times, he offered to change this condition and make her move out, if it made you uncomfortable - you immediately refused. You wouldn't deny a young demon like her shelter out of petty and misplaced insecurities, and the thought that someone other than yourself would actually be doing the brunt of the housework around your new home was immensely enticing.

With a smirk Alastor lifted himself up and stepped away from the door frame, stretching an arm out as an invitation, still smiling.

Your grin widened at him and you hummed, a rather contented purr escaping your throat and rumbling deep within as you took his hand. He pulled you into him, his head turning to press a kiss into your hair, the fresh breeze blowing a smell of flowers and smoke through the garden - you melted against his touch.

"Well then, welcome to your new home, darling...", Alastor mumbled against the crown of your head.

The town house was one of the few places you had never been to before. Over the years, Alastor let you into his world more and more. His radio tower became your most frequented place to be together, and even that took a full year of talks, dinners, outings and strolls together before that. And the progress into a deeper bond that didn't just rely on the foundation of mutual interest and curiosity was a slow one with him. But he was never, in your eyes, anything other than a gentleman and an all around impeccably wonderful sinner - even at his worst, and certainly at his best. And his very best was, by any and every definition, impressive.

He showed you his turf, introduced you to people who worked for him, acquaintances and friends alike. That's how you've met Mimzy for example, although she certainly wasn't one of your favorite people... but that did go both ways. Alastor adored her, and you respected that. You understood that, considering who he is - the petty grudges Mimzy bore against you because of misplaced jealousy were part and parcel of your life on his side. You remembered the joy when he mentioned that Rosie was also a friend and part of his close inner circle, and she soon became someone whose presence you always enjoyed. Fully supportive and invested in you two as she was, Rosie always helped whenever you could think of problems, whether big or small, in your shared journey through Hell. She and Alastor both supported and loved you in all of your ways and plans, the latter having been what helped you rise to editor in chief at the Pentagram Daily and right hand to Zestial, who had gradually turned from boss to close friend to you.

Hell truly came alive for you.

Your focus moved to the townhouse itself. It was modest and tastefully furnished, with dark wood furniture and decor, a wooden plated kitchen filled with plants and the strange hellish shrubbery you grew accustomed to and green tiling on the bathroom floors and walls. The fireplace in the foyer was glowing with a healthy ember and flames, the heat engulfing you, as well as a vague hint of Alastor's signature smell that seemed to be oozing from everywhere.

"Why don't you come and have a seat, love. Let me take your things upstairs and then we'll have some coffee ready in a minute, hm?"

Alastor's hands left yours, and you didn't turn around as his presence receded. Your thoughts were so caught up in the beauty of the house, your pink claws traced and ran over the lines of the wood paneled wall. Alastor had never stayed at your apartment, an agreement and precaution he decided on even when you officially started dating, citing his moral code and the rules of courting he intended to follow. Where he filled the days, the nights were always spent alone, in your own home. The time spent together was full with discussions, talks and occasional killings, and yes, you'd also share more intimate moments - kisses, touches, even some serious fooling around. But he had always stopped, right before crossing the one final line. Your body had been a sanctuary, a sacred place which was not to be violated or disturbed, not even by him. And while you found it almost endearing, after a few years it made you crave finally taking the last step.

It's a funny thing, wanting and craving something with your full body and soul while at the same time, the actual act that would grant this wasn't something you ever thought you needed, in contrary. It had been a weapon, a tool for you to do what you did when you were alive and what earned you damnation in hell, as unfair as it was. Sex was one of the simplest concepts of mankind to corrupt, of course. And maybe this was the reason for Alastor never allowing both of you to crossing that line, too. Perhaps he would have, if it wasn't for him knowing where you came from - because he knew you used sex as a method of getting men to lower their guard, a means to an end.

Your train of thought was interrupted by a faint giggle, and you looked down. A small, wide-eyed cyclops girl stood before you, barely reaching your knees. She wore a dark red blouse with a red skirt, and a white apron covered the front. The demoness beamed up at you, grinning, her single eye framed by a magenta bob cut fixed to your face and hands clasped together.

"Alastor told me a lot about you, miss! I'm Niffty! Can you believe you actually exist? When Alastor first told me about you, I- well- ohh, this is SO EXCITING!! We'll be the best of friends, and we'll talk and you'll tell me ALL your stories and I will learn everything about them, so I won't forget anything and-"

She stopped herself as the sound of a throat being cleared was heard through the hall, and Alastors form, already half obscured in the shadows of the hall, stiffened.

"Niffty, you promised me to not be weird, my dear.", he tutted, glowering at her, one of his eyes twitching and his close-lipped smile tensed. You almost burst out laughing. It was always an endearing and utterly charming sight, when he got flustered or nervous. His discomfort always manifested itself in the twitch of his eyes or nose, or an unexpected flick of the wrist at something mundane and simple like this - and as silly as it may seem to others, Niffty's uncontainable energy, the utter wholesome enthusiasm and weirdness of hers that could get even the radio demon uncomfortable made you soft for the girl.

Your tail swished playfully as you grinned up towards Alastor and turned back to the exciteable demon before you.

"Ah, Alastor did tell me what a lovely companion you were, chèrie.", you told Niffty, a light purr entering your voice, which made her ears prick and her eye to light up, the singular black and yellow iris blown wide. You held out your hand to the maid and gave her a soft smile, tilting your head. "I'm sure we'll get along well together."

Nifftys small, clawed hand shot into yours as if it was on fire and you squeezed it with a slight force that made her squeal with glee. She shook your hand so rapidly you could barely register it, and her head was bopping up and down eagerly.

"Yes! Absolutely!!! I'll do anything, anything, anything!! We will get along perfectly! I'll make coffee, you drink coffee, right? And maybe some cookies!" She said in a hurry, her words and excitement blurring together, not even waiting for an answer but scurrying away to the kitchen. She was as hyper as a squirrel in a tree and equally adorable, and your grin widened with amusement at her enthusiasm.

"So, that's Niffty.", you mused, chuckling at his rather stiff and awkward posture.

"Oh, a dear child, without a doubt - a lovely, twisted little thing. It was fortunate that she met me.", he agreed. Alastor's ears flicked slightly as you came closer, his tone lowering once again. "Still, you must not underestimate her. If you'd see the things she does to the vermin around the house..." He laughed.

"Well, never mind that. You still have the second floor to inspect, darling. Shall we?"

He extended an arm, grinning, and with a raised brow and a hummed 'oooh, scandalous,' you hooked your elbow around his and let him drag you up the stairs with a short lived chuckle.

It didn't even take five seconds for your composure to crack once you saw the bedroom. Not because there was any hint of dubiousness to it, quite the contrary. Everything was nice and clean and sweet smelling, the windows were opened, allowing the fresh air from outside to gently blow into the room. The bed, an old, beautiful vintage piece of dark brown walnut furniture, had black satin sheets that seemed cool and smooth even to your eyes and there was a surprising number of soft pillows and blankets.

"This, I didn't think I'd need to mention... will be the only part of the house to be completely off-limits to young miss Niffty. Or anyone except for us, for that matter." He smiled at you with a most wicked grin as his shadow crept to the door, closing it shut.

Your body froze and your mind went blank and for a moment, you weren't able to think at all, just feel the burning of your body and the tingling of your skin. Oh, dear Satan. Slowly, his words really sank in, and the reality of their meaning dawned on you and tightened your grin.

He wanted the same as you. And it seemed he was finally ready to do something about it.

It was silly of you. So many people in hell fucked every day, in so many ways - whether because it was the nature of sin itself to be more perverse and vile than it could be in the living realm, or because there were so few taboos that remained in hell to keep up... and you were aware of your hypocrisy. A serial killer would definitely not be able to point fingers, let alone judge, others, you knew. But with him, it was different. At least to you it was. He wasn't some pervert. He had principles. Standards. Values.

Valuing you was one of those, and respecting and caring for you, as much as he respected himself. To him, sexuality, lust, any expression of this... had always had to be a conscious decision to be made with you, not some primal reflex forced upon you, if the time ever came.

And the knowledge that finally, that last boundary of your relationship, which, for the past nine years, had become so noticable and odd for others in its non-intimacy, was about to be breached, and his intention to cross it with you as explicit as it possibly could be, sparked a heat inside of you unlike any other kind of flame that has ever burnt your skin. Well, loin des yeux, près du cœur.

"Really, my dear? No remarks at all, not even a clever retort? Did I finally get the cat's tongue?", Alastor teased and you shivered at the way his eyes glazed over like a starved predator, his hungry gaze washing over your flushed, but now obviously and severely flustered face. He always said your flushing, especially when flustered, looked good on you. His large claws brushed down your shoulders and arms, leaving a hot trail in their wake and sending an all-out shiver of delight and anticipation down your spine.

"What a rare sight, you're absolutely adorable when shy."

"You are impossible...", you replied, slowly feeling the soft mattress hit the back of your thighs and the added support behind your back made you keenly aware of just how strong he was. One of the strongest, if not the strongest of all the overlords. And you loved his strength - when he ripped into the bodies of foolish sinners as when he now used it to lift you with ease, sit you down onto his bed, his palms resting on the pillows right besides your head.

"Do you really want to do this, cher?", your words were a breathy, yet rumbling whisper. Your black pupils blew wide, taking over the majority of the shades of magenta and pink and fuchsia.

Alastors grin grew wider at the sight of it, tilting his head as his knees pushed his body even higher, the bed creaking. The sound was familiar, comforting even. He settled above you, one hand slipping under your nape, softly lifting your face up to meet his and the cold claws on the tips of his fingers brushed against your heated skin, just like your icy claws ran down the column of his exposed throat, caressing the length of his neck down to the knot of his bow tie.

"Yes..." He hummed the word out low and long, an eager purr-growl that rumbled his chest and throat and made him grind his hips against yours. Your head fell back in bliss as his knee slotted in-between your legs and pressed, just right, against your crotch, with perfect pressure against the sensitive flesh. A whimper of his name tumbled past your lips, followed by a soft moan. You moved your leg upwards and ran it against his, just so, and his breath, too, came out a stuttering, gasping sigh. "Yes. My mind has been set on this matter for a long while."

His ears flicked again and you watched in rapt fascination as his antlers grew and eyes went darker. And without another word, your lips clashed together in a messy, passionate kiss that left your head reeling and your stomach dropping. Your hands pulled at the silken material of his tie, desperately fumbling with it in order to make it loose enough to allow him to breath as his own claws pressed into your thigh, possessive and demanding, leaving deep cuts in your long, flowy skirt.

A groan escaped your mouth, almost unrecognizable to you. So different from your usual smooth demeanor, so raw, wanton. A moan, loud and hoarse, that shook you with the power and force you put into it and reverberated through both of your bodies, tangled around each other, pressed together. Your vision swam before your eyes, his delicious scent filling your lungs. You drowned in his everything - his smell, the feeling of his weight pinning you down to the bed, his lips, moving against yours in a violent dance and his tongue, swirling around yours. He kissed the same way he hunted, taking no prisoners and leaving no escape - you could still taste traces of the coffee he drank before you arrived, it had been laced with bourbon, a drink you now craved in your blood, and needed inside of you.

In a faraway, dazed state of mind, a realization crossed your cloudy, hazy thoughts. There was no going back now, not that you wanted to, anyway. But now, everything between you and Alastor was going to be different. Unshackled. You were ready to cross that line, more than so, but now, after waiting and building that expectation for so long, there was an even bigger anticipation, so strong, even your arms were shaking, the black fabric of his harness brushing against the skin of your arms as he shrugged his overcoat off.

Every touch of him felt new, electrified by the knowledge and expectation of waht to come. His palm brushed over the thin fabric covering the skin of your stomach. His lips pulled from your swollen ones, tracing a path downwards. Down, towards your neck. Your ear. Your collarbone. Teeth grazed your soft, delicate flesh and his lips captured the skin his hands revealed as he undressed you.

You cried out, eyes tightly shut as he bit and kissed his way down the valley between the soft, malleable flesh of your breast, the heated muscle of your belly, his palms softly digging in the expanse of skin of your legs. His long, glowing, red claws traced the sensitive skin inside of your thighs.

You gasped, almost breathless at this point. So utterly overwhelmed by the sensations of it all, senses oddly heightened by the way he teasingly bit down onto the inside of your thigh - just where the cloth of the undergarments, his last barrier to reach your actual core, ended. The feeling of your own tail stroking over his back, in tandem with his claw cutting the cloth made your vision go white for a moment, the feather light touch making you tremble and breathe his name out like an unholy prayer, repeated over and over.

"So divine and yet so corrupted...", he mumbled against your heated skin, before he shoved one of the plush pillows under your arched back.

"So holy and yet so blasphemous..." you felt his breath cool on the wetness of your exposed folds, so, so close to what you needed, and felt his tongue, carefully, sliding along the folds of your quivering core, just an almost and not yet a finally in sweetest torture, his body a veil between you and the world.

"Only yours to offer...", his eyes shot to you, intense and hungry under his twisted antlers, awaiting your decision, and you nodded with baited breath at which he refocused on the slick heat before him, "...and only mine to take."

His tongue parted the lips, delving inside and licking a broad stroke between them, before the tip danced around your aching clit and just for a moment, you forgot how to even breath anymore, your mind blanking out for an endless, timeless, perfect second.

All you felt was bliss, the sheer pleasure washing over and drowning you in it, the all encompassing, fulfilling sensation of something you had not even dared to dream of was now your present reality and there was nothing else, nothing beside his tongue. A gasping whine filled the silence, breaking through the crescendo of white noise, a cry, a plea for more as his long, pointy, impossibly dexterous tongue lapped against and slipped inside of you, thrusting in and out with torturous drag.

Your hands curled tightly into the fabric beneath you, preventing yourself from bending like a hunting bow as he added not one, but two of his fingers. His rhythm was unforgiving and almost too intense, so perfect, with just enough change for the friction not to burn into an unsatisfactory numbness.

"Mmmh... I could live on the taste of you, love.", Alastor breathed the words against the inside of your thigh, before biting down into the skin with a possessive growl. His claws dug into the plush flesh of your hips, holding them up as blood dripped in heavy drops from the bite. He sucked and licked on the wound and the sight of him, macabre and beautifully latched onto you, was almost enough to make you come, fingers still working against your heat.

You were almost there, you could feel it in the way the muscles in your stomach clenched, the tightening coil deep within, the way your breath hitched and became quicker and shallower, the way you started to tremble, the feeling of pure pleasure and joy.

"Stop, amour. Please stop...", you panted, not wanting to come alone, not selfish enough to be serviced like this, the pleasure too good to end so soon without him in it. You gasped for air, forming the words in your head.

His head whipped upwards, his glowing red eyes narrowed in concern, but you just smiled at him in reassurance, face hot and body sticky to the touch. "Réclamez-moi entièrement pour que nous puissions atteindre la fin ensemble...", you pleaded.

Alastor understood your words perfectly and his eyes widened. He took a shaky breath, before he chuckled and rose up, ripping his dress shirt along with the black harness away and revealing the expanse of his torso, the muscles, the soft fur, the countless scars. His belt came loose, his slacks fell to the ground, kicked away. He was magnificent when dressed - But he was unearthly beautiful when naked, every inch of him on display and for you to devour.

The tip of his member brushed against the slick opening of your core, making you whine.

"Always the one to choose a draw, darling."

Your hands reached for him, pulling him on top of you, the heat of his naked skin pressing onto you. He felt so wonderful, his hair falling forward, covering the side of his face, his breath tickling your nose. He leaned down, the tip of his nose brushing against yours, and your eyes fluttered close.

"You know I always prefer to lose if it's a win for both of us in the end, mon cerf..."

Alastor's lips captured yours again and his tongue entered, claiming and dominating the kiss in the same moment he pushed his hips into you, sheathing himself fully. He felt so, so much bigger than he looked, the stretch a delectable pain, an utterly delightful kind of burn. Your walls stretched around him, trying to adjust and get used to the feeling. It was almost overwhelming, how perfect he fit into you, how his thick, throbbing length brushed against that sweet spot inside of you, his girth stretching and filling you to the brim.

You both groaned, his head dropping forward as his hips rolled and he started to move. Slow, shallow thrusts, testing the waters. He pulled out, almost all the way, before rolling back in and setting a slow, savoring pace, dragging his hips just so to make his cock brush against your most sensitive spots.

Your hands grabbed his shoulders, your claws digging into them until you drew blood. With a growl, Alastor picked you up, letting himself fall back into a sitting position and pulled you upright on his lap. Equals, both able to be in control, both dependent on the other. Connected, not just by your cores, but also by your eyes you sat still for a moment. He was inside of you, and you had never felt this complete. He was a part of you, and the feeling was intoxicating, addictive, all consuming.

And then, he started to move you. Alastor let his head fall into the crook of your neck, whispering your name against your throat and you cried his out aloud, his claws digging into your hips and moving them, lifting them and pushing them down in a growing rhythm, matching his own eager movements, the drag of his cock inside of you utterly divine. You rolled your hips, chasing the feeling of him, while your own claws painted red lines on his back. You tasted blood, your canines biting your lip so hard it opened the delicate skin, and on a whim you nudged his head up to share it with him. He moaned, tasting the metallic fluid on your tongue, and it was enough to drive you both over the edge.

He spent himself inside of you with a hoarse growl, the hot, sticky fluid painting your insides as he wrapped his arms around you to press you even deeper into him, the sensation alone enough to make your head spin and your eyes water with hot tears. Your own high followed, you were desperate to sink your teeth in something, so you latched onto his neck, biting down as your walls tightened around his still twitching cock, milking it dry and coating him with the proof of your mutual ecstasy.

For a while, all either of you did was pant, breathing deeply, trying to collect yourselves and regain any kind of composure. Your eyes were still closed, but you could feel the slight movement of his chest, the beat of his heart under your palms that rested on his chest, your teeth still deep in his skin. You couldn't bear to let go, fearing the loss of his skin on your lips, but his hands came up to your face and gently pulled you away.

A small chuckle left his lips as he looked at you. His face was smeared red with the residue of your blood, and you might as well must've looked the same, coated in his.

"Now, isn't this the best way to christen a new bed? The unholy trinity: Blood, sweat and tears."

You laughed, the sound of it a little weak and a bit hoarse.

"You didn't happen to buy a new couch, too?", you asked, voice playful and low.

"Oh, I certainly do plan on it now, darling. I'm thinking of refurnishing the whole damn house." He grinned at you, his tongue flicking out to lick his lips, and it was impossible not to mirror his impish grin.

A rattle on the doorknob made both of you snap your heads to the entrance of your bedroom. In an instant, you made yourself - and to your delight, Alastor, still sheathed in you, too - invisible, just in time before Niffty broke through the door, in a loud bickering fight with Alastor's shadow.

"....and the coffee is getting cold if they.... oh, they're not here. Why didn't you tell me they're not here? Oh, maybe they are searching for me, maybe I should go look for them? Maybe they're downstairs, or in the garden? Oh no, wait, maybe they're on the roof? No, no, no, maybe..."

She rambled as she ran back down, and with a giggle you made both of you visible again.

" 'Completely off-limits to young miss Niffty' you say?", you grinned at him, a sadistic smile on your lips as you leaned in to kiss the small wounds on his neck.

"I also said to not underestimate her...", he sighed, commanding his shadow with his hand to close the door once more. And this time, with a poignant look and glowing red eyes, to lock it up.

Translations: loin des yeux, près du cœur - absence makes the heart grow fonder Réclamez-moi entièrement pour que nous puissions atteindre la fin ensemble... - Claim me fully so we can reach the end together…

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #alastor #alastor x reader #hazbin hotel fanfiction #fraugwinskawrites #hazbin hotel niffty #quickfic #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader smut #alastor smut #hazbin alastor x reader #alastor x you #hazbin hotel alastor x reader

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hidden-poet · 3 days

Text

Commander Snow; 9

Commander Snow

Summary; Under the advice of Dr Gaul Coriolanus returns back to district 12 where without blinding light of lucy-grey he could see you.

Warnings; dead dove to do not eat, stalking, unrequited love, breeding kink, violence, possessive!Snow, unco/dubco, sexual content, she/her pronouns, explicit, violence, death, sexual assault

Editor: @hotline-to-hell

chapter one

Chapter two

Chapter three

Chapter four

Chapter five

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

chapter 9

When you woke in the morning, the feeling of crushing weight had been released from your chest. The cold mountain air was easy to breathe, and you were now at ease with your loved ones so close.

It had been three weeks since you had escaped. Not a soul had bothered you here. The mountain was too steep and difficult to search.

You felt safe with Edmund here. Like the nightmare was finally over.

Each morning when you woke, Edmund was the first you would look for. You often found him just outside your cabin door by the campfire.

This morning was no exception.

“Good morning,” he greeted. He was chopping large blocks of wood into smaller pieces for the fire.

“Hey. Did you need a hand?” You walk down the steps of the cabin to where he worked.

“Sure. Can you make a pile from the wood?”

You trip over the sole of your broken boot. They were too old to survive the mountains. Edmund stops his work to watch you trot over, trying to kick your shoe back in place.

“I was going to go down later this morning to pick up some more flour, and fruit. I’ll see if Vincent’s daughters have any spare shoes.”

You hated when he went down the mountain to get more supplies. Always sure that he wouldn’t return.

“I’d prefer it if you didn’t,” you comment.

“Even if they’re not your size, it’d be better than what you got.”

“I meant to go down. It’s dangerous. Peacekeepers are still looking for us.”

“Ah, I’ll be right.” Edmund takes up his work again, swinging the ax down, “They’re looking in the wrong spots anyway. I had Frances tell a guard you were hiding in the canal beneath the wash house. They’ll be searching for weeks.”

You imagine Coriolanus wading through dirty water and laugh at the thought.

“In any case. My shoes will be fine. I don’t want you wasting your money on me.”

“My money? It’s you who got Snow to send the money to your mother. Boy, was I glad to get that letter!”

He stands tall and pulls an imaginary letter out of his pocket, pretending to read it.

“Dear Edmund, I think of you every day. Wishing, wanting, waiting for you to come to me. I dream about how handsome you are. Strong and smart too.”

You laugh at him.

“I think Snow wrote that one.”

He laughs with you but all too soon the mood turns back somber.

“I was really worried about you, you know? We all were."

He reaches out to take your hand into his.

“I was so worried about you!” You twist his hand so you can place a kiss on the back of it.

“I kept thinking about you trapped with him. I had no idea what he was doing to you.”

You knew what he was insinuating and the thought of it made you shudder. You were his. Would he want you less if he believed that Coriolanus had already touched you? Was that why he had reverted to treating you like a kid? He hadn’t touched you like lovers do since you have been here. Was it because Coriolanus had already marked his territory?

You push his hand away, irritated at the thought.

“He didn’t do anything to me.”

He reaches back and brushes over the almost healed bruised spots on your neck. You recoil in embarrassment. The night in the kitchen fills your mind. You felt a pool of embarrassment form in your stomach. You should have hated it all but as you remember it, your legs squeeze tighter. It felt good, and you didn't feel like a victim because of it.

“You know it doesn’t matter. What he did or didn’t do. It doesn’t change anything.”

“Shut up,” you beg. “Let's just agree to never talk about him again. He’s gone, or will be. Dead to the district and to us.”

“Okay,” Edmund agrees. “I am sorry.”

You felt bad for lashing out at him when he was only trying to help. You had promised yourself just days ago to be the best thing that had ever happened to him.

“I’ll go cook breakfast, alright? ‘’

Edmund had caught some fish just yesterday. Even scaled and prepared them for you. And this is how you repaid him?

You go back into the cabin and start to warm up the hot plate in the corner. Coriolanus was far away, yet he still seemed to haunt you. Sometimes you felt his fingertips graze your skin.

He came to you at night mostly, when Edmund wasn’t around to distract you.

You would wake up swearing that you could feel his weight on top of you. You would wake up checking for bruises from where he held you down but your skin was clear.

You thought the clear air would push him out but he was stuck and you couldn’t shake him out.

Would it always be like this? Would your life with Edmund be plagued by thoughts of Coriolanus?

No. You just need to focus more on Edmund. Time would take care of the rest.

You push any other thought apart from cooking the fish out of your head. Preparing the food to perfection would exonerate you from your earlier thoughts.

—-

Nights were colder up in the mountains then at the compound. Edmund lent you a jacket but it did little to keep out the cold. It added to your sleep troubles. Some nights you would only get an hour or two. Some nights you wouldn’t sleep at all.

You toss and turn next to your mother, trying not to wake her. You felt unsettled. Too unsettled to sleep.

Edmund slept on the floor beside you thinking that it might help you sleep.

You found yourself wanting to be held. After nights with Coriolanus you had gotten used to being coddled.

You move off the bed and onto the floor next to Edmund.

“Hey, stranger,” he whispers.

A lazy arm is thrown over you but it isn’t enough.

You push closer. “Tighter,” you demand.

He obliged but it still wasn't enough. Coriolanus would hold you so tight, you felt like it was hard to breathe. You used to hate it but as it turns out you can’t sleep without it.

Edmund smelt nicer. A soft woody smell.

He treated you nicer too. Let you choose what you did. You could be angry with him if you chose to. He wouldn’t seek to punish you for it.

Coriolanus tried to buy your love. Edmund tried to earn it.

You would learn to sleep without needing to be held in time.

In the meantime Edmund would be there to support you.

—-----

You sit with Edmund by the campfire while the others sleep. Edmund had paid a informant handsomely to relay District information. He came once a week, late at night to avoid being caught.

You throw a stick into the fire, your boredom and irritation building the longer it takes.

“Do we have enough money for him to keep coming up here to tell us the same thing? Peacekeepers are still searching, Snow’s angry. I could tell you that.”

“Roger has his use. He only needs to give us one piece of crucial information to make the money worth it.”

“And if we run out before he gives it to us?”

Edmund throws his own stick in the fire, watching it burn.

“We’ll be right. We still have the three panams from Snow. I have a little left in savings, by the time all that runs dry, it’ll be mining season again.

“Mining season? Surely this will be over by then. We can’t hide here amongst everyone.”

“What choice do we have, Y/N? The Peacekeepers haven’t let up. We can’t go back to the District. When you mine together, you become family. They wouldn’t betray me.”

Betray him, sure. But you were no one to them. You open your mouth to argue this point but the sound of kicked rocks draws your attention.

A little man in gray, worn clothing and a cap covering his bald head is lightened by the fire.

“You’re late.” Edmund comments.

“Yeah well, Peacekeepers have doubled patrolling the area at night. I come late or I don’t come at all.”

“Well?” Edmund pushes. He stands up with the coins in his hands.

“Ravenstill’s dead. Snow’s gone back to the Capitol,” the man spits out on the grass before continuing talking, “Saw him get on the train this mornin’ myself.”

You sigh in victory. He was gone. Now all that was left was to wait out the attention span of the Peacekeepers.

“Hold on now. I didn’t say he was staying away. Peacekeeper tells me he’ll be back by the time the week is out with the new Commander.”

“But then he’s gone, right? District 12 can’t have two Commanders?” You rise next to Edmund.

The older man shrugs his shoulders. “Maybe. He’s offering a large reward for your capture.”

“Yeah, well I’m offering your life.” Edmund’s voice is hard and threatening. He throws the coin pouch at the man who catches it.

“Settle, boy. I ain't no traitor. I am just saying it seems unlikely that he would offer up such a price only to walk away.”

“Keep us updated on the movements of Snow and the areas the Peacekeepers are targeting.”

The man opens the coin pouch to look inside before nodding his head and turning back the way he came.

You take hold of Edmund’s arm. You worried for his fate if you were found. You worried for your own fate. He was unbearable when you failed to escape. Now you have succeeded, what laid ahead if you were to return?

—------

You began to have nightmares of Coriolanus finding you. You would wake with your mother's arms wrapped around you, and Edmund calling your name.

The dreams always ended the same, no matter how they started; with everyone dead at your feet.

You would run and hide from him in the forest like the night at the cabin. He would find his way into the cabin late at night and crawl on top of you while your protectors slept. One time he dropped from the sky.

But you woke to find he hadn’t found you yet.

You avoided going to sleep. Your mother joined in solidarity, despite your protests. She would stay up with you to chase the bad thoughts away.

Edmund's mother stayed up too. She didn’t want to be the only adult asleep.

You all wait for the update Roger will bring.

You sit next to Edmund watching the flames. You don’t hear the man approaching until Edmund's mother greets him. The man offers a head nod back but his attention is for Edmund.

“Peacekeepers are still searching. Mainly in the city blocks. Rumor that she was seen selling cupcakes in town.”

You scoff at the thought. At least it kept the Peacekeepers preoccupied.

“Alright,” Edmund throws the money to Roger but the man doesn’t disappear, “Was there something else?”

“Her brother,” your heart stops beating. “They got him locked up in the Capitol jail.”

You shoot up from the log in a panic.

You feel Edmund grab your hand but can’t hear the words that he is telling you.

“It’s alright. It’s alright,” he finally breaks through, “They won’t hurt him. He’s all the leverage they’ve got.”

“God. Edmund, what if they do? It’ll be my fault.” Your tears choke you as you speak.

“They won’t. He’ll be safe, okay. He wouldn’t kill him unless he knew you knew.”

“What are we going to do? I have to go back. He’ll let him go if I-”

“Don’t be stupid. If you go back now, he’ll use Archie to keep you in line forever.”

“We can’t leave him there.”

“We won’t. If he wants the presidency he’ll have to go back to the Capitol. We wait him out, and when the new Commander comes, he’ll see Archie was kept for no reason and we will buy him back.”

Your mother sat sobbing and you joined her.

Dear God, what have you done?

“From what I was told, they ain't hurt him.”

“See?” Edmund says, “So long as you stay hidden, there would be no point in hurting him.”

Edmund’s mother comes over and wraps her arms around her elder son. Archie was special to her too.

You had put all her sons in danger. In her heart, there was no more room for you.

—------------

The news of Archie’s arrest had dampened spirits. The days were long and everyone was irritable.

Edmund feared for his friend. You feared for your brother.

He had spent all his life protecting you, now only for you to get him killed. You wished you were still a little girl waiting by the door for your older brother to come home from work. It was a similar feeling to now. The dread of him not coming home filled you.

You wondered how Coriolanus got him on the train. Was it under threat? Did he beat Archie into submission? Or did he lie and deceive Archie?

Your mother was adamant that his capture was not your fault. Even if that was true, Archie’s detention was. You knew Coriolanus would let you trade yourself for your brother. But Edmund was right, if you folded now your family would always be ready for capture to be used against you.

Edmund’s mother was less sympathetic to it all. You had dragged her family into this and now the boy she considered a third son was rotting in jail because you were too precious to submit to the Commander like the rest of District 12.

She was cold to you, never speaking directly to you and only offering glaring stares. Being treated so terribly oddly felt validating. People should be angry with you. You had put them in danger.

You look at Edmund's little brother across the other side of the campfire. He clung to his mother's skirt, resting his head on her lap. He was just a boy, you couldn’t bear it if a hair on his head was harmed. And yet you have asked him to hide in a mountain with you. Leave his school and his friends behind.

No one had spoken for hours as you sat together around the camp, so when Edmund moved suddenly it caught everyone's attention.

He shoots up from where you rested upon him on the log to gaze out as smoke ringlets circle the sky.

“Get your things. Make sure to leave nothing behind.”

None of you move, perplexed at his outburst.

“Now!” he shouts, “Move!”

His anxiety caused you all to jump up and follow his command. He kicks dirt over the campfire to make it look unused while the rest of you pack what little you have.

You came with nothing so you focused on the pots and pans, and stripping the beds.

He joins you as you work with his mother and brother to clean their room.

“What’s going on?” His mother demands but doesn’t stop her work of shoving clothes into a sack held by her youngest son.

“Peacekeepers are searching the mountains.”

“Where are we going to go?” you panic. They would search all of the mountains.

“The mines. They won’t search there. Too unstable for people who don’t know what they are doing.”

He takes the bag of pans off you and throws it over his shoulder.

The mines were a dangerous place to hide, and there was no certainty that the Peacekeepers wouldn’t search them. If they did you would be trapped. They would just keep pushing forward until your group reached a dead end.

Nevertheless, Edmunds leads the group to the trail that leads into the mines.

You couldn’t decide what would be worse, dying by a Peacekeeper or in a mine like your father.

But with Edmund’s hand in yours, at least the rocks of the mountain would let you keep him. The Peacekeepers would tear you from him only in death.

Even with the bags of stuff, the trail is tread quickly.

The cave is dark and so, so cold. You hide in the shadows with your group. Edmund stands to the front once he has herded the group into safe standing.

It is completely silent for what feels like a lifetime. Nothing but the birds in the trees and the wind. It lulls you into a false sense of security. Maybe Edmund was wrong. Maybe his source on the other side was mistaken and blew the smoke prematurely. But soon a distant sound of heavy tire treads could be heard rolling up the hill.

You ignored the first sign of people approaching. But as they got heavier and the talking got louder, it got harder to assure yourself that you wouldn’t be found.

You clutch Edmund's arms. You feel it move to reach for the pocketknife in his pocket.

Peacekeepers call to each other. They were close, you could hear clearly as they spoke.

“Hey, let's go.”

“Commander Snow said every inch”.

“You lookin’ to get killed? Those mines collapse all the time.”

You hold your breath waiting. Should you walk out now to save everybody else?

“Come on, man. No one’s here. We’ve still got half the forest to get to. Come on.”

You feel Edmund relax under you as the Peacekeepers walk away.

None of you move. The threat remains in the woods. None of you were safe until the Peacekeepers were out of the woods and had reported to Coriolanus that nothing was there.

The mountains were large, you wondered how many Peacekeepers had been spared to search it. Even if thirty men, it would take a whole day at least.

It was a whole day spent in the cave, waiting for the Peacekeepers to come back. But no sound was ever heard.

Night falls before Edmund makes the call to investigate.

His mother kisses him before he leaves.

You cringe under her stare. You had put her baby boy in danger. It was your fault that she now had to hide in the mountains away from her home.

It will be a rocky start once all of this is over. How could you work to earn back her affection after all the pain you have caused her?

Edmund's little brother had taken over the role of protector. He stood at the front of the cave, tall and fierce like his brother had. He clutched his knife and looked out into the night with a hunter's eyes.

Edmund was gone for hours but his little brother never tired of his role. If Peacekeepers turned up, the little boy was ready.

You watch over him as his mother makes what little she can from the food.

A dark figure cast into the cave, and you grab the little boy, pulling him back against you to protect him. It was too tall, too broad for Edmund. You shrink back into the shadows as it approaches, reaching down to pull the knife from the boy. On instinct, you open your mouth to scream but it is Edmund's voice that calls you.

“They are gone. Cars are gone, and there are no markings to pick up the search. They won’t return.”

You shake the fear out of you and release Edmund's brother from your protective hold.

Coriolanus had weaved himself into your mind. Every shadow; every sound was him.

You needed Edmund to take his place, but he often acted like a ghost to you, touching you only in reproach.

You wanted to keep something from Coriolanus' reach. To give some shred of you to Edmund that could never be given back.

You started by hugging him tight.

—---

You had decided to sleep with Edmund at the first opportunity after the scare yesterday.

It was hard to pin him down between his hunting, working around the camp, and his family.

You felt like his shadow as you lingered, trying to single out his attention.

He would offer you a smile every time you saw him but wouldn’t stop his work.

You followed him into the woods but his brother would insist on coming to learn how to shoot.

Back at camp, his mother blocked you from his attention. It seemed impossible to gain an audience with him.

You tried to tell him what you wanted but the words would never form in your mouth. He was always too busy to hear them anyway. Telling you to wait until back at camp to tell him what you were trying to say. But camp was too crowded so you always pretended to forget what you wanted to say.

It took three days of pining before the mothers took the washing to the lake. It would take them all day to rinse and dry the clothes and sheets. Normally you would go and help but today you had a goal in mind.

You hide Edmund’s catch from this morning and tell Edmund’s brother that another animal had run off with dinner tonight. You had asked him to go catch fish but he was determined that he could catch actual prey. He was a hunter like his brother, he insisted.

Whatever got him lost for a couple of hours. He didn’t actually have to catch anything but you hoped he did. You would boast about him at dinner. He was a good kid and deserved more attention.

“Hey,” Edmund greeted you. He had gone to collect more firewood and you had grown impatient waiting for him to get back.

“Where is everyone?”

You don’t answer him. He looked so handsome, slightly covered in dirt from his work.

You wanted this to be the moment you remember forever. If Coriolanus did find you, you wanted to at least have this memory of Edmund.

He looks confused as you grab his arm and pull him into the cabin but follows your direction.

You slam the door shut and push Edmund up against the wall, cementing your body like what had been done to you on so many occasions.

You kiss him hard, letting him know how badly you need him.

He stills you with a firm grip on your shoulders, tilting his head higher out of your reach.

“What are you doing?”

“I want it to be you. Not him.” Even on your tippy toes, you could not reach him.

“Not now,” he scolds.

“Yes now,” you refute, “I can feel him getting closer every day.”

Edmund looks down upon you, taking your face gently in your hands.

“You’re safe. He’s not going to get you. I’ll keep you safe.”

You knew he would try but you felt Coriolanus in your bones. You knew he would catch you.

“Please,” you whine. Your hands reach for his belt but he traps your hands.

“You are not going to give me this under threat. He’s not going to persuade you to do something you’ve had the past few years to do yourself.”

“I want to,” you protest. You manage to capture his lips again and he mercifully kisses back.

His barrier was weak. You were sure you could break it down. His hands held your hips and not your wrists, almost giving you permission.

“Edmund! Edmund!” The sound of his little brother's voice was heard only seconds before the door opened.

You separate. Edmund looked almost relieved. He eyes you by his side but gives his attention to his brother. You had broken down his wall but he was saved by the bell.

“Look!” the little boy proudly held up a small dead rabbit. You wished you insisted on the fish.

“Good job, buddy.” Edmund moves from you to his brother, straightening his jacket as he walks.

“I’ll help you dress it.” Edmund doesn’t look at you as he leads his brother back out to the open.

“I can do it!” The little voice demanded.

“I know, buddy. But we can’t afford to lose any meat.”

You could cry at the sense of rejection. Edmund wouldn’t give you another opportunity. You had just wanted to show that you loved him but he would have to settle for words.

—----

You were cold to Edmund the following days, even as you tried to let it go. You wouldn’t look at him as you passed him his meals. Would only speak to him to answer a question. You wouldn’t say more than what was needed.

He still slept on the floor next to you despite your behavior.

You knew he was trying to protect you by his rejection but it stung.

Coriolanus had made you feel desirable. He performed extraordinary measures just for a kiss. And here you were throwing yourself at Edmund, begging him for just that, only to be tossed aside.

Was Edmund's affections real or just a product of Coriolanus interference?

You felt stupid for making the first move. You should have just forgotten the whole thing. Edmund was loyal. He just got confused, and you played the fool. Now you had put him in an uncomfortable situation that could risk any relationship with him after this ordeal.

You loved him but you should have stayed silent about it.

Half of you hoped that Coriolanus would find you and take you away. Maybe Edmund would feel guilty about his rejection, and regret it.

You roll over in bed towards where Edmund is lying on the floor.

No, that’s not true.

You’d rather be Edmund’s doormat than Coriolanus' bride.

—---------

Coriolanus stood backstage at the presidential show. They would perform now for the audience. Answering questions, and charming the crowd. Coriolanus should feel on top of his game. He was known for being charming. It was all he had for the longest time.

Augustus stood at the other side of the stage, Coriolanus could see him through gaps in the curtains talking to his campaign manager.

Coriolanus couldn’t bear to talk to anyone until he was forced to.

His thoughts were occupied with you. All of the District was searched, and all he received from it was rumors. A few whispered leads but nothing to truly go on.

He needed to shake you out so he could focus on his night.

He hated you now more than ever. It was one thing to betray him, it was another to interfere with his presidential campaign. You should have been here now to support him.

But instead, you had run off with another man. He should have killed Edmund when he had the chance. Coriolanus had kept him as a pawn but Edmund had turned himself into a knight.

Lucky was warming up the crowd to introduce the candidates. Coriolanus couldn’t be thinking of this now. You were here. You had gone back to the apartment and he found you there. There was no hole in the fence Peacekeepers failed to find, and Edmund was dead.

When he went back to the Snow penthouse tonight, he would find you there. Drinking tea with Grandma’am and Tigris.

Coriolanus hears his name being called and he enters the stage with a smile.

District 12 was a small place, you couldn’t hide forever. Coriolanus would take the first train back tonight and follow every lead himself.

—----------

You were adding spices to the stew when wildflowers popped up under your face.

Edmund stood behind you with a shy smile.

“I am sorry. Please stop being angry with me,” he begs.

You take the flowers from him to show you are not hostile.

“I am not angry. I just-” you pause your words unsure on what to say, “You haven’t kissed me or even really touched me since I’ve been here. If you don’t feel the same way that's fine, Just-”

“You’re really stupid. You know that?” he cuts you off. He takes a step towards you. You take it as an invitation to place your hands on his arms.

“I’ve loved you since I can last remember. And you take me giving you a little space after you’ve just spent a ridiculous amount of time as a hostage to a man who thinks torturing is the same thing as courting, as a sign I ain't interested?”

You kiss him gently and he allows you to. Your heart swelled under his words. He loved you.

“I meant what I said though. I ain't touching you under threat. When the time’s right, and it’s just the two of us, I’ll give you anything you want. But allow yourself to heal first. I don’t want you to regret anything.”

You kiss him again to show your gratitude.

“Thank you. I am sorry, Edmund. I love you.”

“I love you too, stupid.”

Coriolanus shakes Lucky Flickerman's hand as the crowd cheers for him. Presidency was close even if you were far.

—------

Despite not having a choice, camp life was agreeable. You worked closely with Edmund, helping him where you could and supporting him where you could not.

Your mother seemed happy too, despite her son being in the Capitol jail. But plans were already forming to get him out. And he was safe, or at least relatively safe. You had no idea what he faced but you knew it would not be death. Not yet. Not without Coriolanus knowing that you knew what had happened to him.

The new Commander of District 12 was sworn in yesterday. Coriolanus was there to hand over the title. Roger had said he seemed uptight and disinterested in the affair. You were sure Coriolanus would be gone soon.

Back to the Capital where he belonged. An air of victory floated around you. He would be president and you would return to District 12 where you belonged, but as Mrs. Flair.

You no longer had nightmares of Coriolanus. Soon this memory would fade into a distant dream.

But it all happened so fast; a loud banging noise woke you, and dozens of pairs of boots stomped across the floor. Edmund woke too, tried to fight them off but there were too many of them. All in protective gear and all with weapons.

They drag him and your mother out. None of the Peacekeepers touch you even as you hit and yell.

It was early morning, the sunlight had just been cast over the mountains but the ground was still frozen and wet with condensation.

Edmund and your mother were thrown on the ground and held down while their hands were cuffed behind their backs. Edmund's mother and brother soon followed.

You grapple with a Peacekeeper trying to cuff Edmund's hands. He does his best to avoid you but no one pulls you away. Your hands remain free and none of the Peacekeepers make a move to trap you.

“Please,” you beg amongst the crying and Edmund’s yelling.

You almost don't recognize him. His hair had grown out, and he wore an expensive red coat instead of his Commander uniform.

But his eyes remained the same. Blue and fierce they gazed down at you. You had run straight past him without noticing.

You rush to him in panic, falling at his feet and grabbing his black pant leg in a tight hold.

“Coriolanus, please,” you beg him, “Please I’ll go back. Just release them.”

He ignores you. Nodding to a Peacekeeper who takes a long length of rope from his belt and throws it over the branch of a tree. Another two bring Edmund to his feet, pushing him as he resists.

His mother wails, joining your begging.

“No! No! Wait please!” They continue to set up the rope.

“Coriolanus, please!” you had time to beg as the Peacekeeper does the knot.

He continues to watch Edmund, listening to Edmund's insults rather than your cries.

“Commander, please. I won’t ever do it again. I’ll be perfect.”

He still ignores you. Not even glancing at you as you beg him from the dirt.

“No, no.” The Peacekeeper finishes the knot and fastens it around Edmund's neck.

You go to reach him. You would hold him up if you had to, but Coriolanus caught you by your hair and held you in place.

Edmund kicks like a fish out of water as the rope is pulled by two Peacekeepers on the other side.

You pull against Coriolanus' hold, almost yanking your hair out trying to reach him.

Edmund looks at you as he struggles. His hold body shook, and he kicked at the air in hope. His lips half form your name but it never quite parts from his lips.

Coriolanus does let you go but it was too late. Edmund had stopped kicking. Stopped blinking. Stopped breathing.

You run to him anyway, dropping where he hung.

You reach out and touch his foot as it sways.

“Kiss your mother goodbye, and let’s go.” His voice shoots ice down your spine.

You wanted to scream and yell and cry, but you could do nothing but stare at the dirt in front of you. The sound of crying filled your ears. Dear god, this was all your fault.

Coriolanus doesn’t ask you again, just grabs a fistful of hair and yanks you to movement.

You felt too disorientated to fight back.

He drags you past Edmund's crying mother and brother who couldn’t tear their eyes away from the tree.

You wanted to reach out to say something, but Coriolanus was in a rush to get back to the Capitol.

“Mum,” was all you could call out as you pass her.

He drags you along to a parked patrol car and throws you in the cage used for rebels.

It felt as if the earth had swallowed you whole. There was no fight left in you. All you felt was despair.

Coriolanus had no pity for you. He barely glanced at you as he locked the cage and closed the door.

You lay in the back in your borrowed nightdress and Edmund’s jacket. You bring it up to your face as you sob. He was dead. All hope of a happy future was gone with him. You would remain Coriolanus’ slave until the day you died.

The journey throws you around as they speed down the hill and back to the city section of the District.

You sob the entire way. Edmund was dead because of you. Your brother was in jail. Your mother is now all alone in this world. You wanted to die too. It would be kinder than this existence.

Edmund was dead because of you. His family left without their provider because of you. Your heart ached. Your grief suffocated you. You gasp for air but your sobs block any from reaching your lungs.

What have you done? Why did you think you stood a chance of escape?

You begged the universe to turn back time. You wouldn’t go to the jail. You were trying to do the right thing but your kindness had led to your world being ripped apart.

Why did you have to do it, you thought to yourself. Life could have been so sweet if you weren’t so foolish.

What would your life be like now? Coriolanus wouldn’t be taking you back to the Compound now there was a new Commander. Were you going to the Capitol so soon?

You had a hard time adjusting to life at the Compound. How would you ever survive the capital?

Would you survive the Capital? After Coriolanus had finished with you, would he keep you around after you had betrayed him?

He seemed a different man. Could he still say he was in love with you? Or has that game now ended?

The car stops at the train station. Talking and car doors slamming cut through the business of the station.

The harsh light enters when the door is yanked open by Coriolanus.

You don’t want to get out, hoping to get shot for your resistance.

Coriolanus drags you out by your ankle, taking a tight hold of your arm as he gets you upright and pushes through onto the train.

You don’t struggle against him as he leads you through the busy station. What would be the point?

You enter first class, and the doors get locked by maids behind you.

The only word you can say is “no”, over and over again.

This couldn’t be happening. Was this just another bad dream? Please, just let this be a bad dream.

Coriolanus shoves you into a booth, and you slump against the window. He sits next to you trapping you in. You had no energy to move. Only sob against the cold glass.

You should have just saved yourself the trouble and stayed. Why did you have to anger him?

With the most important passenger on board, the train moves out of the station.

“Enough,” he tells you. But you couldn’t follow his command even if you tried.

You watch the District shoot past you. How you wished you could open the window and throw yourself out.

The rocks pass, and the trees begin to blur into one another. Coriolanus is silent for hours as you cry against the window still.

You could feel him sometimes looking at you but otherwise, he just sat there. Fixing the jewelry he wore. A gold pinky ring with your ring stacked on top of it. His coat buttons were dipped in gold. He had a new watch, a present from Tigris for returning home.

It was only when you shifted from the window and slumped over the table did he speak.

“We were supposed to be in the Capitol weeks ago.”

The Capitol. His presidential run. You had just lost everything you had ever known and he talks about being behind schedule.

You sit up to face him. He was no longer the Commander you knew but something far more fearsome.

“You think I care about the Capitol?!” You cry, “You took everything from me! You ruined my life,” you scream at him.

He grabs your jaw in his hand and pushes your head back against the glass. The glass is solid and cold as you are pressed against it.

“Your mother has joined your brother in the District 12 jail. I would be very careful what you say to me. Did you think this was a game? Did you think I wouldn’t search for you? Wouldn’t find you?”

The door slides open and Coriolanus releases you. A servant walks in with breakfast, and another behind her with juice and pastries.

They set the food and cutlery down in silence. You notice they don’t look up or around, only at what they are doing.

Coriolanus doesn’t thank them as they leave. He doesn’t eat either.

“Coriolanus, are they going to be okay?”

“We could have just left, Y/N. No one had to get hurt.”

You turn back to the window as you speak, “I know.”

The food sat at the table for five minutes untouched before Coriolanus called for it to be taken away again. The servants come quickly and the food is taken away in the same manner it was delivered; quickly and silently.

“It’s three days to the Capitol.” he stands up as he spoke to you, “Two days after that they will announce the new president of Panem. Whatever this is, it’s finished. You do the slightest thing to displease me and your family will follow Edmund.”

You flinch at his name. Edmund would haunt you for the rest of your days. You hoped he would.

“Do you understand me?” he asks.

“Yes, Commander.”

He flinches at the name but doesn’t comment. He clears his throat and walks away into the other carriage.

You pick up on your crying again. You should have known that your rage only ever backfired on your loved ones.

Your throat ached and your eyes were puffy, soon you had no more tears left to cry.

You try a door to see where it leads but it must have a sensor on it because it didn’t open as easily as it did for Coriolanus. He had trapped you in the room. This was your life now. Waiting for Coriolanus to decide what to do with you.

You curl up on the seat and let the train lull you to sleep.

The servants must have come back in during your nap for when you woke the table was filled with food again. A large jug of water sat on the table. You finish all of it and lay back down again.

Coriolanus returns much later, around dinner time.

“You’re still there,” he observes as the door lets him through.

“Where else could I go?”

His hand presses a large button and what you thought was a wall slides to reveal a bedroom.

“You should wash up for dinner. You have dirt all over you.”

You did want to take a shower, but you didn’t want to lose Edmund’s jacket.

Coriolanus steps forward to grab you, but you rise upon seeing him move. Nothing he said was ever a suggestion.

The room was large, with a queen-sized bed decorated in a rich, heavy fabric of deep blue. There were four large pillows and a set of smaller ones with the Panem emblem on them.

A wall was built to hang clothes. You could only see three sets of Coriolanus’ clothing and a dress and a nightgown for you.

On the other side, there was door to a spacious bathroom. You had thought the commanders apartment bathroom was impressive but now you could see why the Capital looked down at the districts.

This bathroom alone was almost as big as the bedroom in the Commander's quarters. Beautiful gold and white titles lay across the floor. A white marble sink with a gold tap. You reach out to touch it.

‘‘Take your clothes off.” Coriolanus demanded. He reaches for the buttons on his own shirt causing the panic to rise in you again.

What would it matter what he did to you? But still, you felt too frozen to move.

He gets halfway through the buttons on his shirt to see you still dressed. His eyes darken as he reaches out to you.

You shrink back against the marble countertop as he yanks Edmund's jacket from your shoulders and throws it to the ground. Your eyes follow it there, as Coriolanus slips your borrowed nightdress off.

You expected more of a reaction from him after all this time. But he seems uninterested in your naked body. He takes your arm and pulls you to the shower head where he fiddles with the tap until the water is to his liking.

He throws you under the hot water while he finishes undressing. The clothes are left on the floor as he joins you in the shower.

You move out of his way to let him have the water but he pulls you back under and reaches for a soft sponge hanging against the wall.

“Look at you,” he mutters. He scrubs the sponge under your nails to get rid of the dirt that had caked under them.

Satisfied he scrubs the sponge up your arms to your neck and down your back. He scrubs too hard. It feels as if he is peeling off your skin.

He is quick along your stomach. Not spending too much time before moving on.

You flinch when he crouches down to scrub at your legs but he stops mid-thigh and returns to full height, dragging the sponge up your leg and resting on your left hip.

“Are you going to do it now?” It was important that you were clean for him, you supposed.

He drops the sponge, using his hand to wrap around your throat and force you back into the glass.

You don’t look at him as he stares at you. He steps closer, wrapping his arm around your waist and bring you against him.

He rests his forehead against your collar bone, the steam filled the air and fogged your view. He is so still and silent. He had made no move to grope you. You couldn’t tell if he even looked at you. He just held you close and breathed deeply.

The room became hard to breathe in as the water turned into steam. But you were too scared to voice even that complaint. He moved from your collar bone to rest his chin on your shoulder but then went still again.

“Coriolanus?” His name was barely a breath on your lips.

“I am so angry at you,” he said softly. You feel the hand on your throat tighten.

“How could you do that to me?’’ He lifts his head off of you to look you in the eye.

“Augustus has been opening hospitals and amongst the Capitol people, while I have been chasing you around District 12. Do you have any idea how that made me look?’’

You think of your family in jail as you speak. “I am sorry.”

“You’re sorry? Not good enough.”

He looked so different with his blonde wet hair pressed down on his forehead. The ends curled slightly towards his face.

“You won, Coriolanus. What more do you want from me?”

“I don’t feel as if I have won. I feel as if I have been betrayed.”

Your eyes twitched with irritation. He felt betrayed? You were astonished you that he felt like the victim after causing you so much pain. He was the only bad thing to have happened. The cause of his own misery.

“You killed Edmund,” you sobbed, “You killed him.”

You bring a fist against his shoulder, but it landed without true force.

“I let him live once. Remember?”

The memory of target training at the train station flashes through your mind before you could block it.

“What made you think I would make the same mistake twice?”

He releases you to turn off the tap. You stood frozen as he dries himself.

His anger had lit yours so when he exited the bathroom, you followed, wet and dressed only in a towel.

“Edmund was a good man.”

Coriolanus was readying himself for bed. He spared you a irritated look.

“And now he’s a dead man.”

His sentence stung you.

You wiped the running tears off your eyes. “He was a good man,” you repeat.

He was the only man for you. The love of your life, now dead and gone.

“How did you know? Did Roger rat us out?” you ask.

“You did,” you wait for him to elaborate as he dresses in his pajamas, “Your letter to your brother. People disappear all the time up there.”

You feel your heart drop at his words. A new wave of guilt comes crashing over you.

“He was smart hiding there. He knew the area well. And the smoke signals? Very good. I never did find out who was sending them, but what use are they if you don’t see them.”

Was. Knew. No more.

“Well enough to fool my Peacekeepers, but I thought, why would she put that in a letter to her brother? Unless it was to warn him. Why else tell him not to come back? You love your brother, of course you would want him back.”

Tears well in your eyes again.

“Is he okay? Have you hurt him?” you accuse.

“It would serve me no purpose to hurt him.”

His movements are hard and sharp as he puts on his satin button-up shirt.

“So you’ll release him? Both of them?” They served no purpose to him in the Capitol.

“When I can trust you again.” He spat.

It could be years before a paranoid Coriolanus decided he trusted you.

“You can trust me. I promise. I’ll make it up to you, just please let them go.”

You walk over to him, reaching out to touch him. It normally worked to disarm him. He is receptive to you, taking a hand and placing it against your face.

“You know why I can trust you? Because I have your family locked in a cage.”

He disappears along with his touch, going over to the cupboard and throwing a deep blue matching nightgown on the bed.

He says nothing else before returning to the dining room and leaving you in the bedroom alone.

You cry as you dress, and don’t stop as you throw the small pillows across the room and sink into the mattress.

Everything you did was wrong. People were hurt because you weren’t smart enough to protect them. Your mother and brother sat in a dirty jail cell, and you had put them there.

They bore the consequences of your stupidity.

Your mind ran and ran with your anxiety. Images of your mother and brother being beaten in a small cell. Edmund’s family slowly starving to death without him. The memory of Edmund as he swayed from the rope.

You wallow in bed for an hour before Coriolanus rejoins.

You feel him slip into bed beside you. He wraps his arms tightly around you and for the first time in months you fall asleep easily.

You woke the next morning with the feeling of crushing sadness.

Coriolanus was awake next to you. You could hear him practicing a speech as he laid beside you. You don’t move. You weren’t even sure if you could.

A knock on the door stops him, and he bids the person to come in.

You don’t have to look to know it was a servant with a breakfast tray.

Coriolanus reaches for your shoulder to turn you over. You follow his direction and he props a pillow up behind you so you could sit up.

You thank the person as they put a small table over your lap.

You felt nauseous just looking at the food. But asking them to take it away may cause trouble for them so you wait until they leave to reject the food.

You place the table on the floor and roll back onto your side. Your bones felt like cement, and your eyes welled with tears but you didn’t have the energy to cry.

Coriolanus said nothing to you as he eats.

He mutters his speech between sips of coffee. Soon that was finished too, and he rose for the day.

He crosses your eyesight as he approached the wardrobe, and you watch him dress. It seemed odd to see him in anything other than his Commander uniform.

You had never seen Capitol fashion before. It was full of layers and tiny details. The buttons on his shirt had a silver swirl design that caught the light. His shirt was crisp and white with a design of two black flowers on either side, reaching from the end of the shirt to his shoulders.

“I have some work to do. Interviews and thank you letters. So, if you decide to come out be quiet.”

You had no plan to leave your spot, but you nod in understanding.

He doesn’t look or speak to you again as he leaves the room.

You felt as if you had died too. There was no life in you anymore.

You lay for hours in the same spot. Occasionally you could hear Coriolanus as he spoke.

The weight on your shoulder caused it to ache but you couldn’t make yourself move.

The only time you shifted during the hours was when the servants returned to serve you lunch. They took the dirty dishes but also the dirty laundry.

You lunch up to stop the women carrying out Edmund’s brown coat.

“Wait, please!” you grab the worn material off her, “Not this. Leave this.”

The two women look between each other, unsure.

“Mr. Snow said to take everything.”

You swing the jacket over you, positioning yourself in it.

“He didn’t mean this.” Edmund’s faint scent lingered on the fabric. He gave it to you to keep warm at night. You had come to associate it with the feeling of protection.

The young girl bows to you and the other follows suit. As they leave, you know it’s to tell Coriolanus.

You sit and wait for him on the bed.

Coriolanus storms in not moments later.

“The jacket,” he demanded.

“No, Coriolanus. Please let me keep it.”

He launches at you, tearing at the jacket trying to pull it off you. You fight against him, cementing your arms to yourself and trying to wriggle free.

He gets it half off your shoulders. But he grew too frustrated to finish the job. He pulls you up towards him by the collar of the jacket.

“Take the jacket off or I’ll tell them not to bother feeding your mother tonight.”

Edmund was right. Coriolanus was always going to use your family as a weapon.

But the needs of the living overtook those of the dead. You had to make sure they were as safe as you could make them.

He gets off you and you get up to give him the jacket.

As he takes the jacket with one hand, he smacks you with the other.

You make a startled sound but Coriolanus is gone before you finish it.

You return back to your spot and sob into your pillow.

With the jacket now gone, you had truly lost every piece of Edmund.

And with him, you have lost every piece of yourself. Only Coriolanus remained.

————

Three hours after lunch, Coriolanus came to sit on your side of the bed next to you.

“I’ve brought you a cup of tea.”

“Thank you. I don’t want tea.”

Coriolanus’s face is tense as he places the cup on the table next to you.

“They tell me you didn’t have lunch either. Is that your plan? To starve yourself to death before we reach the Capitol?”

“I have no plan,” you admit.

“Well I do. I have lots of plans, and you’re through with delaying them. So Sit up and drink your tea.”

He reaches out to your neck to help you sit up. The tea is placed into your hands but it is him you stare at.

“You look so different.”

His hair was a soft white color as it grew out. His clothes were fashionable and colorful. Nothing of the District 12 Commander remained.

He runs his fingers through his hair, combing it back.

“I am still the same.”

“I don’t think that’s true.” You didn’t think it was possible but he was colder, held himself with somehow more confidence. This was the new leader of Panem.

“What would you know? You never bothered to get to know me.”

“I think I know you better than anyone else.”

He showed you parts of himself you were sure he hid from others. The nightmares. The secret yearning to be taken care of. The heartbreak he carried from the loss of his mother.

“Think, think, think. What have I told you about thinking? You’re no good at it. I’ll do it. Now drink your tea.”

You take a sip of the scalding tea. It quenches some of your thirst.

“Will I ever go back to District 12?” you ask.

You weren’t really sure you would want to.

“No.”

“What’s going to happen to me once we reach the Capitol?”

He sighs, ‘‘That depends on you.”

“Will it be like the compound?”

He laughs humorlessly, “Nothing is like the compound.”

“I meant being locked indoors.”

“Will I let you roam free around the Capitol? No.” He doesn’t look at you as he speaks. His eyes move around the room, looking at the subtle details.

“But if you are well-behaved, and do enough to earn it, I will show you all the Capitol has to offer.”

His eyes move down, back to you.

“You’ll grow to admire the Capitol. You won’t hate it forever.”

You go to refute his statement. Nothing in the Capitol could fill the gaping hole left in you from being torn from your home and family. But a servant knocks on the door, taking Coriolanus’s attention.

He commands them to come in but the small girl only steps upon the threshold and never through it.

“Sir, you have a call.”

“I’ll be right there.” He answers back.

She bows and doesn’t rise until the door is shut again.

“Duty calls,” you taunt.

“Yes.” His eyes are back to being everywhere but on you, “I want that tea finished before I get back.”

As soon as he leaves, you get up and pour the tea down the bathroom sink.

—----

The next morning was the same. You laid in bed for hours, unmoving.

Only this morning they didn’t bother to bring you breakfast. You wondered if you would have eaten it, if it was offered, but your guilt still felt so heavy.

Lunchtime came around and Coriolanus disrupted your wallowing.

“Get up. We reach the Capitol soon.” He orders.

He plucks a dress off the rack and lays it across the bed, just under your feet.

It was a blush pink satin gown that tied in a low ribbon at the back. Matching heels that wrapped around your ankle were placed on the floor below.

You sit up to touch the fabric of the dress, and Coriolanus sneaks behind you with a hair brush.

He begins to untangle your hair but he pulls it too harshly. You could feel the tender spot on your head from where he had pulled it just two days before.

“There will be cameras when we step off the train. Fashion is very important in the Capitol. You’ll have to get used to not wearing the same dress every day.”

He pulls a knot too harshly and you let out a cry of pain.

His hand moves yours from the spot and massages it gently.

“That wouldn’t have happened if you had gotten up at some point.”

He returns the brush to the carry bag and returns to you, holding out his hands.

You take them and he pulls you up out of the bed.

His hands move to your nightdress and he pulls it off to place the pink satin gown over your head. He spins you around so he can tie it in the back.

“Put on your shoes and meet me outside.”

He places a kiss on the back of your shoulder before leaving you.

The shoes are hard to walk in. While not overly tall, the heel itself was narrow. Trying to walk felt like a balancing act. You could only manage small steps.

Coriolanus sat at the booth looking out of the window.

The landscape had changed from long stretches of dry dirt to tall buildings.

You sit down opposite him and gaze out the window at it all.

It seemed unreal.

Every building shined. The Panem flag was hung wherever possible. The sky seemed extra blue.

You had never felt homesick but now you realize why Coriolanus was so eager to get back home.

The scenery disappears as you enter a tunnel and stop at your destination.

Your hand is tugged as Coriolanus heads to the exit with the servants and the bags just ahead of you.

You could hear a commotion as you got closer. Voices overlapped and snapping sounds of flashing cameras joined the noise.

The lights were blinding as you exited the carriage.

Coriolanus seemed in his element. He waved and smiled as he lead you through the sea of cameramen and reporters.

They all shouted at him as they held microphones up to his face. But he didn’t stop to make a comment.

More people surrounded the outside. Peacekeepers made a path to a sparkling black car with their bodies blocking the crowd.

He was hailed a king here, and a tyrant back in District 12. All for the same thing.

The scene was overwhelming. Not only were you in a foreign place without your family, but you felt yourself suffocating amongst the crowd. If one were to break through, the rest would follow ending in a catastrophe.

You were a stranger, an enemy. You did not belong here.

You wanted to turn back to the train but Coriolanus’s hold prohibited such action.

Someone opens the car door for him and he lets you enter first.

The silence that greets you helps to settle your nerves. With a final wave, Coriolanus joins you in the car, and it takes off from the crowd.

He sighs and readjusts his jacket so it falls in front of him.

Your hands shake so you keep them clamped together on your lap.

Coriolanus doesn’t speak to you as you peer out the window.

You felt as if you had stepped onto another planet.

The streets were colorful, both in design and people. Cars gilded next to you and in front of you. There were statues and water fountains on every corner.

All gained from the hard labor of the Districts.

Still, you couldn’t take your eyes off the passing scenery. You are hypnotized for the 20 minutes that the car drives. But it soon stops in front of a large brick building.

“Do you live here?” Was this your new home? You wondered.

“No one lives here,” he answers shortly.

He exits the car, holding the door open for you. Following him out, you hear the voice of a man greet Coriolnaus.

“Mr. Snow. Welcome.”

The man was a little overweight in a suit that was finely tailored to him. He had bleached his eyebrows and mustache, and wore many pieces of jewelry.

“Thank you for meeting with us.” Coriolanus shook the man’s hand but returns it to yours as soon as it ended.

“Of course, Mr. Snow. We were happy to accommodate you. Please, follow me.”

The man leads you both into the building and through the halls but only talks to Coriolanus about the history of the building.

It was a beautiful building that housed artwork and portraits along the walls.

You could tell Coriolanus didn’t care but remained civil. His fingers squeeze yours as he is ushered into a room.

Like everything in the Capitol, it is unnecessarily large and grand. Gold candle holders, rows and rows of pews made of expensive wood, oil painted artwork of important men loomed down at you.

“Just over this way, if you would please.”

The man leads you to a table on a small front stage. There was only one chair in front of it which Coriolanus pulls out for you.

The man passes Coriolanus a pen and tells him where to sign.

He does so quickly and elegantly.

“And now for you, Madam.”

Coriolanus passes you the pen but only small writing covered the page and you were hesitant to sign it.

“What is this?” You look up to the man, who rocked slightly side to side.

“It’s a marriage certificate.” Coriolanus answered for him.

“Marriage?”

Did marriage in the Capitol have the same meaning as marriage in the Districts? What did marriage in the Capitol truly entail and why was Coriolanus so eager to have you sign it?

“Yes. Marriage. Now sign the paper.” His hand curls around yours so you don’t drop the pen.

“Coriolanus-” Your words are cut short when his hand latches itself under your chin and yanks it up, keeping your hand directed at the paper. He forces your hand closer to the line.

“Sign the paper,” he commands. With his hand enclosed around yours, you sign your simple signature next to his cursive.

He releases you once you do.

“If you wanted a wedding then you shouldn’t have run off.” He spat at you.

Your hands shake uncontrollably and your eyes water but no sympathy is given by either man.

“You’ve robbed the Capitol of the wedding of the year, truly!”

“I think the Capitol will survive.” You feel Coriolanus tug you up, and the man follows his lead out the door.

“I am sure you are eager to get home and rest before election day.” the man spoke. His voice echoed through the large halls.

“May I just say what an honor it was to marry you two today! You two kids will set a trend. I’ll have young lovers knocking my door down to elope.”

You sob at his words.

“Forgive her. The journey was long.”

“Of course.”

With only three more steps until the door, the conversation died.

Coriolanus is quick in pace, and propelled you to move faster than you could in your heels.

You could hardly see through the tears in your eyes, so you reach blindly until you feel the car underneath your fingers.

“Thank you, sir.” He shakes hands with the man once again.

“Anything for our future president.”

Coriolanus opens the door and guides you inside as he says goodbye to the man.

He allows you to cry until the car pulls up outside of the apartment, at which he tells you to stop.

He pulls a handkerchief out of breast pocket and wipes the tears from your face as they fall.

From the outside you could hear the driver collecting the bags from the boot.

“You need to stop crying. We are home now.”

You take the handkerchief off him and dap your own tears. He longingly stares out the window.

He almost bounces in his seat. Eager to get up the stairs and back home.

Marriage is not the worst thing to have happened to you, nor the worst thing he could do.

It didn’t really mean anything, you told yourself. The Capitol probably wouldn’t even recognize a marriage between a Capitol citizen and District.

You push his patience as far as it would go before you are able to collect yourself.

“Ready?” he asks.

You give a curt nod and he swings the door open.

The driver passes the bags to a servant dressed in the same white dress as the ones on the train. They take them back into tall metal building.

It reached the sky in height, and a whole community of District 12 in width.

Coriolanus knew his way well. With all the wall ways, and feature spaces of the hotel, you were sure you would get lost escaping the building, yet alone the Capitol.

An elevator you knew as you stood in front of it. They had them in large government buildings that you would sometimes ride as you delivered material from work.

The elevator door opens and he hits the top floor.

As it goes up, you feel your stomach drop. Once you reached the top floor, would you ever go down again? Was your life now confined within this building?

It reaches the penthouse too fast. Your feet refuse to move as the door opens.

Coriolanus tries a gentle tug but as the doors try to close again, he motions turn into a pull.

“We’re almost there.” He digs in his pocket for a key.

His key ring that used to carry so many keys now only held three.

The sound of an opening door is met with a loud pop of streamers.

You flinch as the colorful tissues attack you.

A high pitch scream precedes a weight being thrown at Coriolanus but he catches it easily and with great joy.

You take the chance to jump back out of the way.

“Hey,” he laughs.You watch the cousins embrace. You had once promised yourself that letters would be as close as you got to Tigris and now she stood in front of you.

“Coryo! You’re finally home,” she captures his face in a loving embrace and he smiles back.

A crooning sound overtakes the moment and an old women takes the spot of Tigris.

“My boy. Future president of Panem.”

He leans down and kisses her on the cheek. She turns her head for him to do so, coming eye to eye with you.

She turns to you as Coriolanus releases her.

“Don’t just stand there, child. Come forward, let me take a look at you.”

Grandma’am eyes you, causing you to curl further into yourself.

Coriolanus clears his throat and places his hand on your lower back to move you forward.

“May I introduce Mrs. Snow.”

“Mrs. Snow! Oh Coryo!” Tigris gasps, “How could you?”

“We had too. The media would never have left us alone if they knew. But-” he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small jewelry box, “We saved the most important part for you: the rings.”

He takes a ring out of the box. Your hand shakes but he holds it steady as he slides the ring on.

Fifty small rectangular diamonds cover a gold band. It was shiny and heavy on your finger.

Tigris gasps upon seeing it but you have no reaction.

He then passes you a gold band and holds his hand out to you.

You push the ring on his finger quickly.

It was enough for Tigris who claps and jumps.

She wraps her arms around your neck while her grandmother lifts your hand up to inspect the ring.

As they give you space, Coriolanus takes it, bringing you back into his arms.

“I want to hear everything!” Tigris says.

She walks to the living room table and takes a bottle of champagne out of a bucket of ice.

It could have been the lack of food and water over the past three days. It could have been the pure overwhelming feeling of it all. But as the cork of the champagne is opened, your knees give way and you collapse unconscious.

Coriolanus manages to catch you and you feel his hard arm under your head.

You hear him call out to you before the darkness fades your vision.

—----------

You wake at midnight in a fright.

You knew you were in a bed but everything was pitch black.

Was everything a dream? Was Edmund alive and just below you?

The answer was no. Coriolanus woke with your fast movements and worked quickly to pull you into his arms.

“Hey, you’re alright. You’re alright.”

You struggle against him in a panic.

“You’re alright. You’re safe,” he consoles.

“No, no, I’m not.” You feel his face under your fingertips and push against him.

He retaliates by capturing both your wrists in his hand, pulling them down.

“Stop it. Calm down now. You’re alright.”

His weight tugs on your wrists as he leans back to flick on the bedside lamp. It cast a yellow light in which you could see him clearly.

He had gone to sleep in only his underwear again. His old Commander ways were still clawing on.

You register that you had been re-dressed into cotton pants and a large top.

“Please, Coriolanus. Let me go. I haven’t done anything,” you cry.

He pulled you closer by your wrists so your body was leaning against his.

"Please, I am sorry,” your tears soak his bare chest but he doesn’t move, “I am so sorry.”

He moves his arms around you so you were cradled but it did nothing to help soothe you.

“No, no, please,” you struggle but his hold was tight. “I never did anything wrong.”

You tried so hard to be good. Now you were being punished for it.

“I know. I know that,” he insisted, bringing you closer.

“It’s okay. Just go back to sleep.”

You can’t. The image of Edmund swinging in the wind haunted you.

“Oh Edmund,” you cried. It wasn’t his fault. He was only trying to protect you.

Coriolanus made no comment given your state.

“It’s alright. Everything is alright,” he repeats. He hums softly, a song that his mother used to sing when he was a child. He was surprised he still remembered it, or most of it at least.

He used to hum it during his school years when academic pressure hindered his sleep.

It rose his anxiety levels just from the association with those years, but it worked to settle you so he continued.

Your mother used to hum you to sleep as well. When you had bad dreams, she would sit on your bed and run her fingers through your hair as she hummed.

It was easier to pretend that you were only a child back in your bed with your mother next to you, protecting you from all the horrors of the world.

—--------------

The next morning you woke as Coriolanus finished dressing for the day.

Your movement gains his attention, he finishes putting on his coat and comes to sit next to you on the bed.

“Hey, how’d you sleep?”.

He runs a warm hand over your face. You sit up to brush him off.

“I’ve told Tigris and grandma’am to leave you alone today so you can rest.”

Your stomach drops at the thought of being isolated again. You couldn’t be left alone with your thoughts today.

Already it’s racing with guilt.

You latch onto his arm.

“No. Coriolanus please, don’t lock me in here.”

He looks to weigh up his options before deciding.

“I won’t. But you need to show me that you can behave. I won’t have you upsetting Tigris or Grandma’am.

“I won’t,” you promise.

“They don’t need to know the full extent of us. Only that we are happy to be here together.”

“Ok, Coriolanus.”

You shove the thick blanket off and swing your body off the bed.

You follow Coriolanus to the kitchen table where Tigre’s and grandma’am sat eating breakfast.

Tigre’s rises as you enter into the room. She keeps her distance so not to overwhelm you.

“Y/N, how are you feeling?” She asks.

“Much better now. Thank you. I am sorry if I offended you yesterday. I wasn't feeling well.”

“No! Of course not.” Tigris exclaims, “God, you’ve been through so much. I couldn’t even imagine how you are feeling right now.”

Your eyes flick to her. Coriolanus had made it seem like her and Grandma’am knew nothing of the truth, but could she know at least part of it?

“You must have been so frightened when those rebels took you to the mountains,” Grandma’am commented between a scone.

Your eyes shoot at Coriolanus, who was already looking at you, silently telling you to be quiet.

A twisted truth is as good as the truth itself in his books.

“Yes, I was. Everyday. But I knew Coriolanus was coming.”

“Our Coriolanus isn’t scared of coward rebels!” Grandma’am exclaims.

Coriolanus was quick to change the subject at the first sound of silence, “Tigris, she hasn’t had breakfast yet.

The breakfast table is near silent as everyone ate.

It was a relief when Coriolanus kissed you goodbye. The company of Tigres was much easier to keep.

—-----‘

Coriolanus was busy now that he was home. Interviews and meetings took most of his time now that the elections were coming up.

You saw little of Grandma’am, but Tigris almost always was in the apartment.

She tried to be kind to you. She often went out of her way to check on you. But you avoided her. Staying in the room you were placed in. If you said the wrong thing to her, it was sure to make its way back to Coriolanus, and your family was to pay for it.

Your days before Coriolanus returned home were filled by looking out the window, or preparing an item of clothing for Coriolanus. He always wanted to have at least one thing on that you had some part in preparing.

He tore off his buttons so you could sew them back on, you shined brand new shoes that didn’t need it, ironed shirts that had already been ironed for him.

You didn’t argue when he asked you to do it.

If you performed an action in the way he wanted, he would give you updates on your family.

From what you gathered, they were fed and allowed an hour outside together.

The day of the election came fast.

It felt as if it happened overnight, but it had been three days since your arrival in the Capitol.

The election was called at eight o'clock which meant the entire day was filled with buzz. People came in and out all day. Coriolanus spent the entire day on the phone, or in between breaks talking to the people in the room.

You sat in his chair as he worked standing. You watched the people as they came in and out. They looked different from people back home.

They all had something unusual about them. Funny color hair, a piercing that stuck out of their face. One thing they all had in common was their high quality clothing. Nothing like the sacks District clothes are made out of.

Grandma’am and Tigris had gone out to prepare themselves for the election. It was nearly night but they had been gone since the morning.

Coriolanus was in the middle of getting a haircut when two females came up to you and requested that you followed them.

Coriolanus told you to do so from where he sat. You didn’t ask why as you followed them to the bedroom.

With the door shut, they tell you to shower and come back so they can dress you for the election.

The news causes you to tense. You were not ready to face the Capitol.

But with no choice, you take a shower and return for them to do their work.

They only talk to each other as they work.

They dress you in a white strapless gown that split up the side to show more white sparkly tulle, and white heels that were shorter and easier to walk in than the pink heels that you had at the train station.

They gossip about elite members of the Capital. Who was cheating on who. Who wore what.

One burns you with a hot iron as she curls your hair because she leans forward to laugh. No apology is given as she continues to talk. She pins small white roses throughout your hair. The pins scrape your head as they enter your hair but you make no complaint.

You were grateful when they finished dressing you. As soon as they begin to pack up, you exit the room without a goodbye.

You run into Coriolanus, still with his team in the living room. He stood in front of a tall mirror as you had taken the main bedroom.

He matched you in white. Admittedly, he looked gorgeous in a double-breasted suit with his white shirt peeking out from it. The first few first buttons were undone and a silver chain with your ring hung around his neck.

He was fixing a white rose to his chest pocket when his eyes caught you in the mirror behind him.

“We are finished here,” he tells the room, who pack up immediately.

He looked nervous, and you supposed he should be. All his life had been leading up to this moment.

He talks low to you so the others don’t hear as they leave, almost whispering in your ear.

“Just a few more hours and you’ll be looking at the President of Panam.”

Your hands shook, and you flexed them to try and shake the nerves out.

Coriolanus, always hyper-aware, noticed, capturing your hands and bringing them up to his face to kiss.

“Shouldn’t I be the one shaking?” he jokes.

“I don’t want to go. You don’t need me there.”

“I do need you there.” He releases you, annoyed at your resistance.

You sit down on the couch as the people make their way to the door.

“Do I need to remind you that your performance tonight is crucial to your family's survival?”

“No,” you say softly, “That’s never left my mind.”

He crouches down in front of you, resting his hands on your waist.

“Good. Now people know you are District, but you’re not to mention it. If anyone mentions it to you, you tell me straight away.” He flicks your chin up so you are looking at him and not at your lap. “Hey, straight away.”

You nod your head in understanding. You had no plan to talk freely with any of the Capitol brood anyway.

“As first lady of Panem, you’ll be required to attend performances like these from time to time. I need to know I can trust you not to embarrass me when you do.”

You nod your head once again, “You can.”

You remember Ravenstill’s wife. All she did was smile and sit pretty. You could do the same, regardless of the pain you felt.

He raises himself slightly to press his lips against yours before rising entirely.

“The car is waiting down stairs.” You rise with him and he takes your hand in his through the walk.

The car ride is silent. Coriolanus began to practice his speech again as you stared out the window.

The Capitol seems quieter than usual. No car buzzed around as you drove. One or two passed but they seemed to be in their own rush. Not a person roamed the street.

All of the Capitol held their breath as they waited for their new President.

The car stops in front of a huge fountain surrounded by a large field. It was out of place amongst the sky scrapers. It was filled with people, all wearing peculiar colorful clothing. Nearly all of them wore a white rose upon their chest.

They surrounded a large stage lit up with bright lights.

Rows of chairs were lined across the back of the stage. People hovered around them, all wearing white like you. They greet Coriolanus as he walks through. Some of them even greet you, but you hate them all the same.

You see his grandmother and cousin sitting directly behind the podium. He seems to be trying to make a beeline to them, but people keep interrupting them.

He keeps his temper, politely dismissing them as he wades through the crowd.

His grandmother jumps up to kiss him. He uses his spare hand to bring her in close.

“President Snow, we salute you,” she says sincerely.

“I’ve not won anything yet, Grandma’am,” but his smirk told that he knew he was about to.

Grandma’am wore a hat of white roses but a simple white dress suit and pearls.

Tigris rose as well to hug her cousin now her grandmother was out of the way. Her strapless white dress hugged her curves right down to her ankles where the dress dissolved into white tulle. You could see the outline of white roses on her dress too. Her makeup was centered around the pale pink eyeshadow that was blown out towards her temple.

Finishing with Coriolanus, Tigris turns and hugs you, but you couldn’t manage it back.

Coriolanus leans down to whisper in your ear, “All you have to do is sit down next to Tigris and smile. Can you do that?”

Your families life depended on it, so you smile back at him to show that you could.

The Panem national anthem began to play bringing a hush over the audience as they all go back to stand in front of their seat and sing.

Coriolanus stood next to you, still holding your hand as he sung. The camera flashed in your face and you decide it was better to sing along.

The song finishes and the large screen behind you switches to a man with a microphone on one side and another man in a field similar to Coriolanus. You assumed the latter was his political opponent.

It was the cue for the people on stage to take a seat. You take yours next to Tigris and Coriolanus walks up to the podium.

Smaller screens are prompted up along the front of the stage so that no one on the stage was facing backwards.

You watch as the man with the microphone gives his introduction, introducing himself as Lucky Flickerman before the screen flashes to Coriolanus, and then cuts to Augustus.

You eye the open field. The guards were all focused to the front. There were a few people off the side but they looked mostly like stylists and operation managers. They would hardly put up a fight for you.

You could make it. At least on to the street. But how would you make it back home? How would you free your family? How could you live with yourself in District 12 without Edmund?

Tigress reaches out and entangles your hand with her in comfort. It brings you back to the election.

Lucky performs a few magic tricks as the final votes are counted.

“Now for the moment we have all been waiting for.'' An assistant runs up and places an envelope into Lucky’s hand.

“The results are in people! Who has Panem chosen to be our new leader? The savvy businessman or the fearless Commander? Let’s find out!”

Not a word was spoken as the man opened the envelope. It must have been the result he wanted, for he broke out into a grin and began to shake his head.

“Just as I predicted. Ladies and gentleman, the new President of Panem: Coriolanus Snow!”

The crowd erupts in cheering around you. Loud popping sounds precedes colorful confetti dropping from mounted cannons. Tigris lets go of your hand to clutch Coriolanus.

She sprang up from her seat and captured his head between her arms. His grandmother is next up to crowd him. He brushed off people quickly, he had a speech to make.

You wonder if you should get up but there were already too many people around him. You would only be in the way.

He makes his way to you, bending down to place a kiss on your cheek before turning back to shake hands with those around him.

The win came as no surprise to him but he wore a large smile, and seemed almost giddy at the news.

He turns back to the podium and people quieten as he gives his speech. You heard him mutter it a million times. You could almost recite it for him.

“Today is a new day for Panem,” it began.

You eye your freedom just down the stairs but remain seated and smiling.

You’re not sure how long Coriolanus spoke for, but the applause and cheering told you he had stopped.

Before you knew it he was standing in front of you with an outstretched hand. You take it and he stops to kiss his family, giving them instructions as to where they should now go before he leads you down the steps and into the crowd.

You shrink back as they gather around him. His grasp hurt. Your bones in your hand felt as if they were about to pop out of place. But it was too easy to get lost in the crowd, so he wouldn’t loosen it.

Too many voices overlapped to hear any single one. A few pats on your shoulder was all the attention you received while Coriolanus was drowning in a sea of people.

You couldn’t make out his words over the people and the music. You let yourself be overtaken with the senses.

You smiled and nodded at people as you passed them. It was Coriolanus’ big night, you couldn’t even fathom the punishment if you were to make a mistake tonight.

You stay close to him, just over his shoulder.

He looks back to check on you one or two times but never opens his mouth.

Confetti had been hidden in his curls. You focused on counting the pieces.

The whirl-pool of people seemed to never end. As soon as one person faded another took their place.

It must have been half an hour before Coriolanus made the small distance to the apartment block.

It was 30 stories with a roof top bar that was pumping with lights and music.

The rest of the people would mingle down below with food and drinks. Huddling around the colorful glass standing tables.

You reach the entrance, guarded by two peacekeepers, and Coriolanus leads you in front of him as he presses the button for the elevator.

It was quick to come and Coriolanus pushed your hips to make you move inside.

He lets go of you as you enter and gives a wave to his fans as the door closes.

The elevator is dead quiet. Only the faint sound of pumping music could be heard.

You think he is too wrapped up in his victory to pay you any mind now you were out of sight of the public.

You were relieved almost to be out from under his attention. But he moves quick to push you up against the wall and smash his lips onto yours.

His hands steady your face as he assaults your lips.

He leaves you out of breath and grins at you widely for it.

The door dings open, and he pulls back from you. Only taking a loose grip of your hand.

Another cheer for the President was heard over the music as he steps out.

You look around the room at all the people in white. Supporters of a maniac.

Tigris and Grandma’am were offered a lounge chair as they ate and drank.

“Look,” he spoke to you, taking a green drink off a tray offered to him, “The apple pie drink you wanted. I requested it especially for you.”

He passed you the drink as a man approached him.

You managed to get a “thank you” out before the stranger began to talk.

Coriolanus paid you no more mind the rest of the night. He spoke and joked freely with the party goers while stringing you along behind him.

A few spoke to you about mundane things but Coriolanus was quick to end any longer talk then a few seconds.

The drink did taste like apple pie. A low rate apple pie. You could bake one much better. But for a drink it was fine. You ended up drinking three before Coriolanus snatched the fourth and placed it on a nearby table.

Tigres caught your eye a couple of times. You knew she was making sure you were alright. She was kind, and so ‘un-Capitol’.

Grandma’am was more true to her up-bringing. She insisted on teaching you the ways of the Capitol, and training you out of your ‘District ways’.

“It'll be our secret,” she told you over breakfast this morning, “I’ll defend you against the District rumors.”

In a way you supposed it was sweet of her. Although her intentions could very well be for Coriolanus' benefit rather than yours.

The later it got, the quieter it got.

People began disappearing. Others passed out on sofas and lounges.

Coriolanus' energy never seemed to drain, but Tigris’ and Grandma’am’s did.

Tigris had come over and interrupted Coriolanus' conversation. She offered to take you home with her and Grandma’am but Coriolanus was resistant.

“She’s fine, Tigris. I’ll bring her home with me.”

If you had been on equal standing with Coriolanus, you would have protested and just left but you were mud under his shoe, so you smiled at Tigris and told her you would see her in the morning.

Tigris kissed both of you goodbye. You hold on to her for too long. You could tell from the way Coriolanus squeezed your hand.

The party continued long after she had gone.

Your legs hurt from standing in the heels and your dress was too tight to have eaten all you did over the course of the night.

Coriolanus could sense that you were nearing the end of what you could take, so he began his final lap of victory around the room.

You were beyond grateful when he ushered you into the car.

You sighed as you sunk down into the plush leather seats, taking off your heels instantly.

“Thank you for tonight,” he said as the car entered the main road which had returned to its normal state of business even late at night, “You were very well behaved.”

“Congratulations on your win,” you return.

“Snow always lands on top,” he talks softly as he gazes out to the city.

The car rolls through the city smoothly. Coriolanus watches it pass from the window.

You feel half-asleep resting your head back on the seat.

You feel him move you down to a lying position and your eyes shoot wide open. His fingers brush your skin as he slides the skirt of your dress up.

“What are you doing?” You catch his hands and he lowers his head.

He hushes you as he slides your panties off your hips, “All the drivers talk.”

Trapped in a car in a city that kills your people for entertainment, you lay back and don’t make a sound.

You clutch the back of the seat in a tight hold as Coriolanus begins.

Edmund was barely cold in the ground and here you were, being eaten out by the man who killed him.

You try not to focus on it as Coriolanus' lips and tongue work. It pulls a moan from you and Coriolanus hits your thigh.

You press your tongue between your teeth to avoid making noise. A hand makes its way into Coriolanus’ curls and tugging on them gives you a sense of satisfaction.

It encourages him however and his movements become more targeted and passionate.

The car pulls to the curb in front of his house by the time you had made a mess in the backseat.

You lay back with your legs spread as you come down from your high.

A chill shoots through you as the door is opened by the driver but Coriolanus pulls it closed before he could see the scene.

You get up despite not being ready too. Coriolanus grabs your shoes and pockets your panties, taking your hand when its free.

You both emerge from the car as if nothing had happened.

It was late and cold. You thank the driver as you pass him.

The building was huge. Nearly all the floor was covered in titles and your feet made a sound against them.

You try to slow your walk to quite the sound, but Coriolanus was eager to get up to the apartment.

He storms across the lobby, and courtyard before reaching the steps that lead to the elevator.

He presses the button too many times. It doesn’t make it come any faster.

The house is dark and silent as you enter. The women went to bed hours ago, and you were hopping to follow suit.

Coriolanus leads you to his bedroom which is large and not yet decorated.

You pull free from him as you enter. Immediately you tear all the pins and roses from your hair.

You hear Coriolanus drop your shoes.

He clears his throat to gain your attention.

“Your brother and mother have been freed from the compound.”

Your fingers freeze in your hair. It felt as if he had lifted a great weight off your chest. You turn to him in gratitude.

“Thank you, Coriolanus.”

He smiles down at you before stooping down to your height and placing a firm kiss to your lips.

You push back against his shoulders after the kiss continues past a normal amount of time.

He pushes back, bracing you against the bed with him on top of you.

His lips turn to your neck as he unzips the back of your dress.

“Coriolanus, please don’t,” you beg.

He slides the dress’s straps off your shoulder as he responds, “Please, just give this to me. Don’t make me take it.’’

The dress is taken off you, and Coriolanus strips it off with kisses.

Only when a kiss is placed on your hip do you begin to struggle.

This man had tormented you for months. Starved you. Robbed you. Killed the man you loved. You would give him nothing freely.

You kick and push him away, but he is stronger.

“Hey. Hey, it’s okay.” He pulls you upward by your wrists to the pillows.

“No! Get off of me!”

“Y/N, please. Please,” he pleads.

You continue to fight but he persists.

“Please, don’t make me do this.”

“No. No. Edmund! Mum!”

“Shut up,” it was less of a command and more of a plea, “Please, shut up.”

You do. What would your resistance gain you? A few more seconds until the inevitable.

His grip loosens as you are still beneath him.

With only a weak hold of your wrists, he pulls off his clothes. You can hear the movement but can’t force your eyes to open.

Tears leak down your cheeks but you refrain from making a sound.

“It’s alright. I’ll take care of you.”

He lines himself up and pushes in with ease. The pain was subsided due to your wetness from the car ride but the first slow thrusts felt slightly painful and uncomfortable.

You whine slightly as you adjust to the intrusion. You fight to release your wrists from his hold, you wanted to push back on his shoulders, feeling as if he was too deep.

“It’ll only hurt for a little bit,” he promised, continuing his slow movements.

He kisses you as you let out another whine.

Soon the pain did stop, and an enjoyable sensation began to form.

Coriolanus tried his best to remain slow, but as he got lost in his own lust, he forgot about your pain.

It felt as if he was bruising you. But his mouth never left yours so you couldn’t voice a complaint.

Your hips jerk away from him, trying to ease the pressure but his spare hand stills your hip, making you take the full brunt of what he wanted to give you.

He pulls his head back from yours and groans.

“Ah,” he grunts.

“Coriolanus-” you had wanted to ask him to slow down but you feel yourself tightening around him as you come.

His hand moves from your wrists and intertwines with your hand. He presses his weight down as he picks up his pace to chase his own high.

“Wait, wait!” you were through. Every second after was too much.

“It’s okay. You’re okay,” he grunts.

You groan from the pressure as he continues.

“Almost there, darling.”

His last few thrusts are hard but the pressure turns into a warm pool between your legs.

Coriolanus is still as he rests his forehead upon your shoulder. You don’t move either, unsure of what to do.

A few moments later and he raises his head, repositioning himself so his arms cage around your head.

He drags a finger down the bridge of your nose and it runs off your cheek like a tear.