#why am i so annoying to myself . i dont even care about other peoples opinions i think whats really bothering me is myself | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

marioyuri · 1 month

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Augh frankly i dont want to talk to anyone ever again i just want to go in the woods and fight people until i cant feel the pain from the cold

#i try too hard just to feel disappointed #maybe its bc i used to fist fight too much as a kid #idk maybe its some kind of withdrawal #instead i have to be some fag that draws bullshit #i should join a boxing club or something #its not the same thing man #i just need someone willing to fight for fun #maybe watching fight club is not helping im gonna be so for real #watching this movie as a kid could have done something to me #now its just making me so fucking irritated in a way #its a good movie but ive already experienced these epiphanies so its just wasted on me #theres just so many radicalising media you can experience before you grow numb to it #like yeup what else is new #bleh #man i never realised how much i used to fucking duke it out with people #well people. heh #the details are irrelevant #too many new people talking to me and it makes me realise i genuinely dont like bothering figuring out who i am #i dont like it i dont care it doesnt even matter man #i dont care…….. dont force me to think about it OK!#i literalt just say the first thing that comes to mind and then act like yeah sure thats my opinion on the matter FUCKDO I KNOW IF THATS IT #I DONT KNOW? I DONT KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT ANYTHING???????????????????? YEAH SURE ☝️#fucking byllshit leave me alone #dude ive been dealing with like 6 dms at once every day idk what personality im using for who anymore #i care about the wrong people theres some people who are fine with me being lame i should care more about my friends i already have too #why am i so annoying to myself . i dont even care about other peoples opinions i think whats really bothering me is myself #i already know everybody fucking loves me i fucking love myself too or at least i think i do!!!!!!!!!!!!#what i do is that if you lie to yourself enough you end up believing it. thats been my philosophy for being happier being myself #but lately im starting to think maybe i just made it worse for myself in some twisted way #did i ruin myself man did i lie to myself so bad i cant even trust myself to be right about how i feel anymore. i dont know. i dont know man

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epickiya722 · 1 year

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An izuocha shipper said this:

Bkdks are just so transparent and easy to read. The people who rant now and want "justice for iida" are the VERY SAME people who always call him irrelevant to the story, boring, annoying, talk down his friendship with izuku and still havent forgiven him being rude ONCE to izuku in the very beginning of the manga before he and izuku even were friends (ohhhhh but anti bakugou people have to forgive bakugou ABUSING izuku for 12 YEARS, right?) and unlike bakugou didnt need over a century to apologiez! Lets be real, there is maybe just 1% of bkdk shippers who are really mad that it wasnt iida. For the majority thats not what the real problem is. They arent mad, because iida was "swaped" with ochako in the opening, they are mad because it was ochako and NOT bakugou! NOT ONE OF THEM would complain if instead of ochako reaching her hand out for izuku, if it would have been bakugou! Despite that there is no such moment in the manga between them! Its all about their shipping agenda. The anime can be as inaccurate as possible, bkdks dont care as long as bones highlights izukus and bakugous relationship even if its not manga canon.

What do you think about it? I'm interested in your opinion

And I am happy to give my opinion!!

Once more it's just other shippers trying to take a stab at BkDks and for what? Because they can't let it go. They're just bored and can't help but be asses.

For one, a lot of BkDks I have seen NEVER said Iida is boring or that irrelevant in any way. When it comes to other characters, I have seen a lot of BkDks defend them, Iida being one, Uraraka being another.

Hell, ask a BkDk who their favorite female character and most likely you'll get Ochaco Uraraka aka Uravity as an answer

No one is upset that it wasn't Bakugou that held Midoriya's hand in the opening. We're upset because once more Uraraka is just being used to fuel that role that it seems she's being forced into, which she doesn't deserve. She doesn't deserve to be a girl who only seemed to have Deku on her mind. A lot of her actions aren't even influenced by him and it sucks that others don't get that. On top of that, Iida, who a lot of us love, myself included, hated seeing his big moment taken away like that.

That's what it's more about. When that chapter came out that the opening is alluding to, no BkDk shipper I saw get upset. Why?

Because Iida is another good friend of Midoriya’s, he's also a great character on his own and it was nice seeing him getting the spotlight in that moment. It's like with Kirishima, BkDks like Kirishima because he is also a great character. He just happens to be a friend of Bakugou's. Do BkDks hate that? No!

Also BkDks and Bakugou fans aren't asking for anti Bakugous to "forgive" Bakugou. No one cares how they feel about Bakugou.

At most, what is being asked is not being so annoying about it and leave that space alone that does like his character. They're constantly the same ones sending threats, purposely tagging their anti posts wrong, commenting under fics, reblogging posts, etc. Like hate Bakugou, that's your preference and no one is forcing for a change of heart.

But how in the fuck (excuse my language) are antis going to throw the "Bakugou is a bully" card (mind you, who at the end of the day is a fictional teenager) yet do trolling and bullying REAL PEOPLE?

And!

The anime actually CAN'T be inaccurate as possible because all it's doing is ruining what Horikoshi and his team has worked on in the manga. It's why it's highly encouraged to read the manga.

I'm not surprised an IzuOcha shipper said that because guess what the anime is doing? Making IzuOcha seem more important when there's other things they should be highlighting like Iida's importance. If anyone is easy to read it's some of them.

BkDk shippers love BkDk, yeah, but most I have seen are always excited for the other characters, analyzing scenes about other characters and themes, hell, some are even multishippers so they do like other Bakugou and Midoriya ships.

Honestly, BkDks and Bakugou fans are probably the sets of people that seem to actually care about the story as a whole the most.

Ashido got a scene cut? A BkDk shipper will point it out. Shigaraki didn't say that in the manga and it's out of character? Oh, look that Bakugou fan caught it! Uraraka being reduced to nothing more than a girl with a crush despite having other great qualities that should be highlighted on? BkDks and Bakugou fans are ENRAGED.

Overall, to summarize this (it is long and I apologize for that, I ramble) BkDks in general don't care that it should have been Bakugou who held Midoriya's hand, I know I don't. We care about Iida's and Bakugou's significance to one of the darkest times in Midoriya's life. We care that Uraraka is also treated with care as she should be. If the opening wanted to have an IzuOcha moment, they could have! Just why make it the moment that should have gone to the characters that was important in that vital moment? They've been doing original scenes and whatnot forever, why stop now? Why take something away from other characters that are just as important as the protagonist and main girl character?

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claudiathegremlin · 2 months

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im bored, so im gonna rant about alastor's breakdown scene

deal with it

(i also may have lost the post with most of my info but whatever shut up/j)

WARNING: MAJOR spoilers for for hazbin hotel

if you havent watched it all the way through, id reccomend that-

also speak of sensitive topics such as father issues, mental breakdowns,

i feel like i should say this, i am NOT a psychiatrist, in ANY way shape or form, and im just speaking from prior knowledge and experience, aand also my friend who has studied psychology and all that jazz immensely (say hi to ros! :)

i also make an excess of unnecessary and dumb jokes so if you cant handle that bye i guess (/j)

(will also include random images here and there of him, bcz why not)

okay, so i dont think its that much of a secret that alastor is NOT okay, mentally (and physically, i mean, look at that gash thats not healthy smh)

it could NOT have been made ANY clearer that theres something wrong going on in this mans head, and its... uhm whats the word help ive backed myself in to a corner here

theres more than one s o m e t h i n g thats wrong, i guess, and im here to give my opinion and theory on the matter so uhhhhhh

make sure to SMASH THAT LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE BUTTON FOR MORE AMAZING CONTENT1!1!1!!/j

okay very dumb and idiotic jokes aside smh, im gonna explore and explain each one of the reasons i think this guy is not okay, starting with

d r u m r o l l

father issues! yayyyyy amazinggggg totally not horrible haha whaatt.. anyways, there are numerous hints that alastor had, at the very least, a very problematic father, and, hey, ever notice how he's more comfortable around women?? and that he was a confirmed 'mamma's boy'? yeah, based on those two things (i only provided two reasons because, haha, i may or may not have lost the post i was using for info) i think we can concur that he had atleast SOME sort of father issues, and not the "oh yeah he's just an annoying goofy fella" kind of father issues

of course, we ALSO have the deal he made, which was brought up briefly in episode 5, and 8

and there i s kind of a funky little debate on who the deal was with, and what it was for, but the two main cantidates are lilith, and roo

and who knows what lilith/roo makes him do, even? ...okay, aside from lilith/roo, who would be the ones making him do things-

i dont know, theres not alot i can say on this matter other than its most likely alastor made a deal with either lilith or roo to save his power or something, and briefly bring up the fact that he probably does have to do some things here and there, and the fact that if it i s lilith he made the deal with, she probably sent him to help out with the hotel, maybe, i dont know

WHEWWWW OKAY THEN lets get in to some of his behaviours that are n o t at ALL good or normal, the way he treats husk and reacts to him 'caring' about his 'friends' wooo yayyyyy

also heres another alastor image so you little grubs(/j) dont get bored at the lack of things to look at woo

lets start with how he treats husk, thats just, thats not nice man dont do that :(

jokes aside though, there HAS to be some reason that he treats him like this, theres no way that its just because he owns his soul- like, unless husk did something reaallyyy bad theres no reason to treat him like that (granted, alastor IS in hell for a reason, and is NOT a normal or good person)

anyway thats it for this section because i really dont have anything and im relying on the wiki and memory alone to get me through this post shush :(

okay lets talk about his reaction to him nearly dying for his 'friends' and actually caring about them

its clear that this man has some sort of issues with caring about people, and there has GOT to be more than one reason why other than "oh no people are gonna think im a softie thats no good :( *has a breakdown musically*" i mean, it COULD be just that one, but i just really dont think it is honestly, i dont really have that diffinitive of a reason, i just really think that something happened that made him n o t want to get attached to people,

and i REALLLYYYY want to know what that reason is in season two

alright, for the last bit of this post, i think we should discuss the fact that he always smiles

we DO know that one of the reasons is that, to him atleast, a smile is a valuable tool, that keeps your friends inspired, and your enemys guessing, and always ensures YOU'RE the one in control

but its HEAVILY implied in this image that there is another reason,

if you observe close enough (not really that close, but hey who has perfect eyesight not me) you can see it looks like his mouth is stitched, and even more so to be literally always smiling so theres a possibility that either lilith or roo is ALSO forcing him to smile

then again it could just be something about him literally not being able to talk about his deal, which is also plausible

...or thats just what he looks like idk im not here to judge his fashion choices

CONGRATULATIONS!! you made it to the end of my stupid post! keep in mind that any and all of this could change at any given point, and i will update it accordingly....if i remember to

i am not using this in any way to condone his actions AT ALL, you shouldent be a cannibal, or a serial killer, or be manipulative (is that the right word???), thats unswag smh, and i am NOT AT ALL a psychologist, or a psychiatrist, once again, i only really know some of these things because my friend rambles about them, and i used to get in to crime and psychology documentaries when i was bored

so i am not at ALL a professional

thanks for reading this shit show of a post

#alastor #hazbin alastor #alastor hazbin #alastor hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor the radio demon #radio demon #hazbin hotel #hazbin

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gaienenkidou · 5 days

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HELLO 6 7 20 enkidu character opinions Please

wtffff i had to dig through my activity to find that you sent this because it got eaten by other notifs!!!! whoever coded this website needs to get fired i swears. ON IT BOSS o7

6. What's something you have in common with this character?

im more chatty online but even then the amount i talk depends on the day. but irl I understand why enkidu is the way he is in any social situation because quite frankly yeah me too. i dont even talk irl i just think to myself and observe everyone and just go "ahum yup ok" and nod at everything people say because literally what am i supposed to say. but once people talk about a topic im familiar with i might say a thing or two all of a sudden. maybe three. the only difference is that enkidu is The strongest man ever and i am just some random ass person that takes care of children sometimes

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?

unib memes range from annoyingly overused as per usual for fgs (chesto/akatsuki thot slayer. mika XD half of the time. hilda is 19...do people even still make bathwater and jav jokes anymore oh god those were annoying day ONE) or either funny to Mehhhh depending on the context (just any memes involving merkava come to mind. wagner honest mids My toxic trait is thinking a good chunk of them are funny btw. nana jokes are hit or miss too) but enkidu memes have always been the ones i've consistently laughed at the most being removed from my inherent bias and i imagine that's the result of him being very under the radar. but like holy shit enkidu mains are funny as fuck? the enkidu tier jokes in unist. you had to be there for the "they added enkidu in uniclr" era. and then the memes after that when they took 66c away from us. and of course "I guess I won't say anything..." and the enkidu autism jokes. guy who just has the funniest meme material with just his balancing history and being the way he is ALONE

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?

even though they have the whole "ending each other with honor" thing going on the fact that they kinda worked together in uni2 (wished we couldve actually seen how they were working together ahahahaha. ha) and also their mutual respect for each other i think wald and enkidu should settle down from their own debts and be old men besties. idk linne can have a weird uncle now or something i just want to see them talk in a slice of life context so bad ESPECIALLY FOR WALDSTEIN. like they can't just give us funny ass trivia like "he has to eat like 7 bowls of food and also needs to enter the back door" and not put him in SoL situations with other people.

#asks #omiwa txts #under night in birth #its always fun when i get to talk about enkidu for Free

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jaeger-pups · 1 year

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omegaverse!Zekeren : a touchy disagreement?

Z: look I understand if you're mad but you're being reckless at this point

Z: Answer your damn phone, Eren

Z: think. you're by yourself out there

E: I AM thinking! I just need some air, fuck

Z: You left almost three hours ago

E: so fucking what? Stop texting me

E: in case screening your calls isn't making it clear, I do not want to speak to you

E: either of you.

E: I can't believe you actually agreed w/ him

Z: for what it's worth, I genuinely didn't think i was picking a side. Or that it'd upset you this much

Z: Grisha made a valid point though

Z: whether you see it or not

E: See WHAT?? you and dad are NEVER on the same page

E: about ANYTHING!

E: you couldn't have picked a worst stance to get behind

Z: what, that you're not like typical omegas?

Z: I didn't agree w/ that to insult you

E: yea but that's what HIS whole aim was, I bet

E: to make me feel like shit🙄

E: really could've left my gender out of it

E: it's always a cheap shot idc

E: "dOnT yOu ThInK iT'll Be DiFFiCuLt FoR yOu To FiNd An AlPhA wHo'LL pUt Up wItH a TeMpEr LiKe YoUrS?"

E: "hOnEsTlY, eReN. yOu sHoUlDnT sPeAk To AlPhAs LiKe ThAt. YoU mAkE yOuRsElF a TaRgEt."

E: he's always making me out to be fucking different

E: like it's a bad thing

E: what if I don't WANT to be like other omegas?

E: what if I don't CARE what Alphas think of me?

Z: It's just complicated, little brother

Z: honestly I think Grisha's just concerned about you

E: ugh, what fucking world do we live in where you're suddenly willing to VOUCH for him?

E: this feels sexist af why are you not on my side?

Z: I am on your side, ffs Eren! I just agreed w him about your temper. Even I’VE told you to be more careful. Have I not?

Z: you need to come back home. I gave Carla my word i wouldn't leave before you got back

Z: or that I'd go out and find you if you took too long

E: I'm still annoyed

E: I probably need like another half hour or something out here at least

Z: How far did you storm off?

E: far enough where I could rage in peace?😒

Z: It's getting dark out.

E: mhm.

Z: Eren.

E: I mean are you trying to persuade me? Or is this more of a command-thing?

Z: I wouldn't command you. You know that.

E: not that you couldn't. 😒

Z: I wouldn't is what I said. I couldn't do that to you.

E: cus I'm an omega.

Z: well... yes. That's part of it.

E: see? Now there YOU go doing it

E: reducing me to my God damn gender

E: I can defend myself, yknow. I don't need anyone hovering over me in case I make myself anymore "undesirable" 😑

Z: no one said you're undesirable, Eren

E: it's close enough. The way HE gets on my case, at least 🙄

E: you have no idea how hard it is, Zeke

E: like no idea. It's so much simpler to be an Alpha. Or a Beta.

E: at least no one undermines your thoughts or opinions. Or makes you feel like your sole purpose is submission & pleasing everyone else.

Z: I know I can't understand. But I hear you.

E: it gets so fucking frustrating

E: he acts like I fucking chose this or something.

E: I'm more pissed at him than at you honestly

E: cus its just like... constantly w/ him.

Z: yeah.

E: you know what I mean?

Z: ...Yeah. yes, actually.

E: right, so... idk.

E: i don't hate being an omega. It's not like... unbearable. Dangerous and annoying sometimes but.

E: dad just... makes me feel like I do it wrong or something. HE’S not even an omega, so it's like how tf can he tell me how to handle it? How to behave, even.

Z: Sorry for not realizing it was a sore subject

E: it's fine ig.

E: I mean at least you guys agreed on something for a change

E: I'm trying to get better w/ my temper too. He just never notices when im doing pretty good

E: cus even though I think it's performative...

E: I mean... I can talk less. And do chores. And cook; clean.

E: I can be an omega the way people expect.

E: I'm not different on purpose.

Z: you're perfect.

Z: Grisha's just always had this tunnel vision w his expectations for his kids

Z: you don't have to meet anyone's standards but your own tho

Z: Carla and Grisha just worry.

E: yea I know.

Z: you still have to be careful out here too, though.

E: ...I know. Sorry i ran off.

E: I'm coming back now. Mom's probably thinking the worst.

Z: well you're not wrong lol. She was able to relax when i told her you were finally responding to me

E: ok. Could you meet me halfway? It is pretty dark out.

Z: 😏 started walking maybe five minutes ago.

E: lucky you're so intuitive, huh? Lol do you even know where I am?

Z: I'll find you, trust me

E: right, cus you're an Alpha? Must be nice😮‍💨

Z: bc I'm your brother. I could find you in my sleep

E: still. Must be nice being able to depend on instincts that aren't almost exclusive reminders to 'submit, cower and please'😕

Z: can't imagine.

E: ikr. I'm omw tho.

Z: alright. I'll meet you in the middle.

Z: stay on the trail though.

E: yeah yeah, big brother. I hear you. "Good omegas are indoors before the streetlights are on" and all. I know, I know.

Z: lol where'd you hear that?

E: Aunt Faye.

Z: haven't heard from her in a little while. Since New Years, I think

E: she talks to mom a lot. Asks about you, too

Z: I'll have to call and check in.

E: yea. but come get me first :<

Z: lol of course. i'm coming.

#jikuere #zekeren #omegaverse #abo dynamics #texts #another scenario no one asked for :)

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kaleidoscopic-quiddity · 1 year

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not to have npd and autism, but i genuinely don't understand how the opinions of other people have an impact on people's self esteem. like im not saying this in an edgelord-y oh look at me im so cool and stoic way but genuinely why does it matter if other ppl think you're ugly/annoying/etc?? like if you're content with your own personality and/or appearance how does what other people think have any impact on you?

i get that some people treat others like shit when they think they're ugly/annoying/etc and i get how that's an issue, regardless of whether they like or dislike them everyone should be civil and professional to everyone else, but if people just internally feel that they dont like you but otherwise still treat you fairly and decently literally how does what they feel actually matter in any material way? its literally impossible to be liked or respected by everyone, some people just inevitably don't like other people, thats just how people work, and that's literally fine as long as we're all still treating each other decently yknow?

like i don't want to say that letting what others think/feel about you is childish since it obviously isn't, people of all ages seem to be like this, and im pretty sure im the outlier here vis a vi NOT having my self esteem based on what others feel about me, but the idea of ascribing even a spec of value to anyone other than myself's opinion about me is so genuinely incomprehensible to me i can't help but feel that other people are missing out on a super obvious lesson that ive had internalised since i was a kid

is this because im low empathy?? does my npd just make me invulnerable to having my self esteem impacted by anyone other than me? am i just too autistic to be effected by others? is this because im such a consequentialist that i don't care what others think of me as long as they still act civil with me???

#actually autistic #actually npd #if ppl are willing to explain this whole 'other ppls opinions of me enform my self worth' thing to me thatd be great bc i Do Not Get It #og post //#npd hours #autism hours #btw the funniest option here is that im literally SUCH a consequentialist that even on a subconscious level if effects my thought processes #i love consequentialism so much he is like a sister to me okay <3 #truly the most autistic ethical philosophy <3 #oh rbing this is fine btw

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funkymbtifiction · 2 years

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Hi! I am an unhealthy version of an ISFJ. I'm constantly judging people by their looks or capabilities. I really don't like it when people don't think like I do either. When I try to change the way they are thinking and it's not working at all then i give up on them and I dont really give a **** anymore even if they crash and burn. When people are also smarter than me and understand so many different perspectives on different subjects, it also bothers me. Someone being smarter than me annoys me and i don't actually know why? Why am I so unhealthy and judging people constantly? Is there a way to be better? In the past i used to be more understanding and i never used to judge someone. I was really a helper, people looked for me when they needed someone to talk to and feel understood but as of late, i have changed drastically in a bad way. I was eager to help people but now they drain me a lot. I also like to compare myself to the past version of me. The one who was better and more understanding and more calm. I'm kind of stuck. What is going on?

Sounds like a Ti loop (bypassing Fe and bearing down too hard on an immature / critical / "tear them apart" lower thinking function). Something in your environment / lifestyle has caused you to stop using Fe accurately (to care about and connect to people, and focus on what you have in common rather than the differences, by pointing out to yourself and others that "we are all human") and to bear down too hard on Ti, so that it has become your default. Weak Ti can be unfairly critical and unconcerned with other people, it can nitpick and pull them apart. It can also become insecure at other people being intelligent because it's measuring itself against other people and feeling insecure about whether it's smart or not.

To recover... what's causing this? Is it school? A person in your life? How is it affecting your relationships? Have you screwed one up yet enough to feel the burn of it? You need to identify what's forcing you out of Fe into Ti and do something about it. Returning to healthy Fe means learning to accept that not everyone is going to agree with you, but that you can listen to them and respect their views, while being sure of your own opinions and live in harmony by focusing on the things you agree on, rather than the differences. It means tuning in to other people and asking what they need from you (what do I need to say to them, what do they need to hear, what can I bring to this conversation that enriches them?), rather than sitting in judgment about them.

The fact that you hate it and don't want to be this way is an indication that you are willing to change and want to go back to your earlier self. You've already taken the first step. The way to recovery is to think about the people you love, and about how your behavior is hurtful to them. How to use Ti properly means analyzing your own reactions and judgments and deciding what it says about you. Then choosing a course of action. You are not at the mercy of your thoughts; you can take them captive, halt them in their tracks, and change them. The next time you find yourself being unfairly critical, stop and force yourself to think something nice about that person, or reflect on a good thing about them. Shift your thinking on purpose, and it will become easier and easier, as you remember what you LIKE more than what you hate.

It would also be helpful to know your Enneagram type -- if you are in fact a 2 that has disintegrated into 8, for example, and wants to 'watch the world burn' because you feel taken advantage of, or disrespected, or unloved, or like no one listens to you. If that is the case, it's time to do some soul searching on your motivations and the Pride that drives your attempts to influence others toward your way of thinking (because "I know better than they do what their life SHOULD look like!"). 2s can become very resentful when others do not appreciate them, take their advice, or do what they say, because they pride themselves on being necessary and essential to other people's lives. As a result, they can offer unsolicited advice, or want their friends to think the same way as they do (Fe + 2 in particular wants a consensus of views / to be in harmony with others), and react badly when this does not happen. But in real life, people are not always going to like you, agree with you, listen to you, or do what you say -- so it's better to learn to reach people through kindness and a genuine interest in what they think rather than a need for control.

(This also could be a Ti grip, which would make you an ESFJ. Some of it sounds a lot like what my EFJ friend has described in her "worst moments.")

#question #mbti #esfj #isfj

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compassionatereminders · 1 year

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(you don't need to give advice or even reply, I just want to express some thoughts and love your page.) I'm tired of how in society we are so critical of each other. like, whether it be what someone wears, or a decision someone makes, or whatever, we feel so entitled to comment on it and criticise it. and I understand that this will never change and so time is best spent trying to not care about what other people think, but it still gets on my nerves. I am quite a loud person. not in a shouty way, instead i'm talkative/chatty and don't really hide my genuine feelings about something (not in an insulting way. I wouldn't hurt someone else's feelings like that, not deliberately). what I mean, is I say what is on my mind and don't fear doing so in situations where other people may conform. and I feel like this is exacerbated by the fact that due to mental health issues a couple of years ago, I'm a year behind (and older) than everyone I go to school with, so I have more confidence in lessons and things. and my mum often comments on the fact im a 'chatterbox'. and I just think why is it necessary to like, label? the last time she called me it, she didn't mean it in a bad way, I am leaving home in a year to go university so I was excitedly talking about that. and tbh, most the time I talk too much, it is when im on about something im excited about. but despite her not saying it in a bad way, I got the impression she thinks it's a negative thing. like if I talk too much with my grandad, she tells me to 'let him rest' like I'm too much or something. and I understand that of course, and I do recognise the cues when I should stop or it's getting a bit too much. but basically, my personal opinion on all of this is that we all have our quirks, we all have things that make us distinct and individual, so why criticise others or comment on these things? like, yes, I am very talkative, especially if it's with someone I love or if im talking about something I'm passionate about, but why is that necessarily bad? the other person in the conversation gets chance to speak so I dont see why it is. I just think we should accept people's little differences and maybe appreciate the strengths that come with them.

I completely agree! I'm an extroverted, talkative person myself - and while it annoys someone every once in a while, it can definitely also be a good thing. And a quiet, introverted person got different strengths! Neither is inherently better or worse. And none of us should be shamed for doing what comes naturally to us

#chat with kat

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thatkinkyboi · 2 years

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Possibly unpopular opinion (and also possibly uninformed on the original meaning) but i have serious beef with the concept of enthusiastic consent and that being the only proper consent. The way a lot of people use it someone needs to actively be excited about sex in order for it to count and i just think thats stupid. An entire adult using their words and saying "yes" is consent enough in my opinion and the amount of enthusiasm is their own thing to debate with themselves. On a personal level I am both ace and also depressed and i dont appreciate the implication that i cant properly consent if i cant muster up enough enthusiasm, nor would i like to fake an emotion for this purpose thats just stupid. I run into little info graphs that do this sort of thing a frankly surprising amount and i get real fucking annoyed. So yes unpopular opinion anon for ya.

You made my day! Thank you so much for the anon. This is actually a really important conversation to have and I think it needs a lot more discussion.

So, enthusiastic consent (is supposed to) refer to the participant's willingness.

In an ideal world, a "yes," would be enough. However, a lesser talked about form of sexual assault can still take place even if a "yes," is given.

This is called "coercion."

It's a really tricky and insidious form of sexual assault and can be difficult for the victim to even really understand if they aren't familiar with the concept.

The most basic explanation is when someone is pushed into changing their answer from a "no," to a "yes." So, while consent was given, it was forced, coerced, and not freely given.

This is where enthusiastic consent comes in. It's not so much about someone jumping for joy going "fuck me!" It's more so about being genuinely willing.

I, personally, do not consider ambivalence as coercion. For example, someone asks for sex or initiates, and the other person is thinking "well, I don't really care, so this is cool." Ambivalence is where a person isn't really interested but is also not opposed. Kind of a "take it, or leave it," situation.

Now compare this to someone initiating sex and the second person thinking "I do not want to have sex, but I do not feel safe enough to stop." That is coercion. This happens in a kink setting where someone is shamed/guilted out of a safe word. BUT it is just as common to find in relationships.

In some abusive situations, a person can be harassed, pushed, begged for sex, and guilted into giving "consent." But because they eventually gave in and said "yes," it was not a genuine, enthusiastic "yes." Thus leading to the term enthusiastic consent.

For me, personally, most of the sexual assault I experienced in my previous relationship was coercion. It's why it took me so long to understand what was happening and why I felt guilty, disgusted with myself, and dirty.

Often times, when I said "no," it was seen as up for debate. It would almost always lead to an hours long argument until I eventually gave in because every fight had to be resolved and then ended with sex. (This was not my choice.)

Another tactic used was sleep deprivation. The arguments would often times start when I was trying to go to sleep so I had a choice of arguing and staying up late until I gave in, or just laid back and let it happen. This went on for years to the point where I didn't even bother to fight back.

So, to sum it up, "enthusiastic consent," isn't always about being excited and eager for sex. You can have true consent even if you're ambivalent.

It's about true, genuine consent.

Let me know if this helps! I'd love to hear some feedback!

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gg-selvish · 1 year

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I only ever really Sapnap characterized as the “straight one” in dnf fic which is usually used to contrast how someone reacts to their best friend versus how someone reacts to someone they’re attracted to. That makes sense to me even if it mischaracterizes Sapnap’s relationship with dnf. I’ve read one too many fics where dnf are hitting on each other or flirting or direct it teasingly to Sapnap and have his reaction be running for the hills. Like Sapnap hasn’t leaned into every gay joke or flirtation made by his friends, but he’s got to be the “straight one” because that’s how the straights react and the whole poor Sapnap save him thing. It does serve the purpose of getting Sapnap away, which I do like because I prefer a dnf fic to be just about them and saves me the trouble of having to read people trying and write a character I like, but they don’t care for.

mmm i disagree and also agree with this so this is gonna be long-winded as i often am.

i do agree that the biggest perpetrator of super straight and like... man's man sapnap is dnfers because of this like ur so right and. as someone who reads a lot of dnf i wish they just wouldnt even mention him lmaoooooo reading whatever reason theyve made up to get him out of the house is amusing in an annoying way. i like dnf fics where theyre just alone in the house and no one asks questions why. i read dnf for dnf not for sapnap to be there especially if they're gonna characterize him the way they do. but thats dnfers and they do things their way and thats fine i just ignore it im not gonna police anyone's writing i'm just gonna talk about it on my little blog with like 12 followers and hope no one reads it...

my biggest issue with it and where i saw it a lot in the older days (late 2020 through 2021 especially but it went beyond that too) in a way that really grinded my gears was with this like. one specific breed of karlnap. i used to ship karlnap and LOVED karlnap especially during their initial meetups. im a dnkn shipper til i die there's no reason for me to dislike them. but i just couldnt stop finding myself reading these fics that were just so strange. hyper-masculine sapnap with ditsy effeminate karl in this very very binary way that i just couldn't compute. it not only disagreed with my personal opinions but it would develop into what i saw as a slightly off-putting lack of chemistry and was just really unenjoyable for me to read. it read like m/f to me which is fine but when im looking for mlm fic i want to read mlm. this goes back to wanting queer dynamics in representation of queer relationships (note: i'm using the word representation VERY loosely. im not implying fanfiction is anything close to actual representation). it was just so weird

it's kind of funny because i realized this in a very roundabout way. a friend of mine from outside the fandom wrote and gifted to me a karlnap fic based on the karlnap they had read and it was like the perfect highlight of the dynamics in the ship that bothered me... i loved the fic, still love my friend for writing it, but it really pointed out that the characterization of those two was just so set in stone in those days and i read it but i didn't like it in the long run or as inspiration for my own writing. the writing was incredible, the quality of it was great and it popped off it was amazing. my issue was with the guts of it, yknow? the internal stuff.

that's one of the main reasons i started writing karl differently than i used to (remember when i used to write karlnap? subbottom karl in MY christian minecraft server?) and focussing on kwtnf because i was mad about the sapnap characterization but didnt watch him solo enough to focus on him... then i hyperfixated onto karl and went fucking hog wild with the idea of him and his character in my head. it obviously didnt do anything i dont have any impact on other people but it made me feel better lol

#i said i would never talk about my sapnap thoughts but ur asking very fun questions and i just love a monologue #gentle reminder that characterizations of real people holds no basis in reality whether they're my opinion or anyone else's #karlnap neg ?? just in case idk #ask

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muttfangs · 1 month

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processing shiiiiiiiiiiiiiit and rantiiiiinnnnggg👍

rrrghhhhhhgh I'm trying to do better by myself and others by being an effective communicator and being less "rigid" and "stubborn" but fffffffffrrghh one of my close irl friends is just **SO** incredibly annoying it's astounding at times. I love him but he REALLLLLYYY pisses me off sometimes with how obtuse and insensitive he is. for context he is a white-passing trans man. incredibly neoliberal. twink. conventionally attractive. I mention the above descriptors bc he's super insensitive and shallow in regards to how ppl look at times. he will occasionally bring up how he's happy his transphobic brother is "fat" and how he "looks better than him now". speaking to me. a fat dude. and I understand you hate your brother (he's a huge piece of shit!) but theres a ZILION things you could pick him apart for... and you chose his appearance? while speaking to me, someone who looks like him? and every time I catch him saying gross superficial shit I say "hey, that isn't fair to rag on someone's appearance" he PUSHES BACK AT ME LIKE??? BRO. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW HURTFUL THIS IS TO HEAR FROM YOU. EVEN IF IT ISN'T ABOUT ME DIRECTLY. YOU ARE STILL SAYING FAT AND BALD PEOPLE ARE UGLY. I AM BOTH. he also just like... doesn't want to listen to anyone's opinion if they feel differently from him regarding gender / politics. I attempt to open dialogues with him about leftist theory... and thinking deeper... but he thinks he's right no matter what and just digs his heels in and metaphorically plugs his ears and goes LALALALA and it's??? quite frankly infuriating for example: i've told him multiple times at this point that I'm not comfortable in sapphic spaces. I am a dude. I look like a dude. I sound like a dude. I'm gnc but I use he / him. and I don't want to be invasive in spaces meant for lesbians. it feels super awkward and upsetting (AND REALLY WEIRD.....) when there's "parties" that are for """"AFAB people only"""" and he asks me to go w/ him????????? like uhh...... this is gender reductionist theory 101. what are they gonna do like. check ppl's junk at the door? make you bring a copy of your birth certificate? that's fucking weird, man. he invited me to another one when I was at our mutual friends place last week saying "this one is different! no cis men allowed!!" and it just makes me stop and think for a moment like... how do you quantify cisness....? I look unclockable. I look cis. would I not be allowed in even though I'm trans? would they not allow me in until I showed them I have a cunt? like what is the fucking thought process here, bro? clearly every time you try to invite me to these like fuckin terfy ass VAGINA HAVERZ ONLY parties I get really uncomfortable so ??? why do you keep asking??? why do you not listen to me when I tell you it's fuckin WEIRD to be exclusionary like that?? why not instead have a "no transphobes allowed" rule instead (WHICH MAKES WAY MORE SENSE???? THAN NO CIS MEN????)?? ... like I hate to beat on my fuckin drum about gender theory adn whatever... but barring "cis men" from these parties bars (pls excuse my language I dont have a better descriptor) AMAB eggs from exploring. it bars ppl from finding themselves. it bars cis men who maybe want to play around with their expressions or sexuality. and, needless to say it's WILDLY UNCOMFORTABLE to be reduced back down to my genitals. I'm more than just a walking cunt. I'm a complex human being. and I have ****zero**** fuckign interest being in these thinly veiled VAGINUZ ONLY TERF spaces. but he's all about that shit and doesnt care!!!! whatever!!!!!!!!!!

#barking into the void #as I tell him often... i love you dude but you really get on my fucking nerves sometimes #RRRRRRRRRRRGH

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pesterloglog · 2 months

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Jade Harley

Page 147-150

JADE: are you talking to me?

JADE: because if you are i would like to remind you that i hate!! orange juice!!

JADE: well i guess i never really had a strong opinion on it before

JADE: but now i cant stand it!!

JADE: its all you drink!

JADE: its my body and i dont want orange juice!

JADE: i hate pulp, and i didnt just make that up to spite you

JADE: who wants strings in their juice?

JADE: ughhhhhhhhh

JADE: fuck you rude calliope inside my head!

JADE: from a 'characterization' standpoint, i think you are pedantic

JADE: annoying

JADE: and just a general huge drag to be around!

JADE: why dont you try being possessed by the spirit of some other version of a good friend of yours, and floated around a spaceship full of people you love

JADE: unable to affect anything or say hello to anyone!

JADE: then tell me about whiners!

JADE: sounds like a you problem

JADE: well i had to watch my boyfriend and my brother die in front of me on a tiny scaled version of a world that i shrunk for them!

JADE: and then spend the next three years talking to myself, wracked with guilt that id killed them!

JADE: youre a member of a species designed for long periods of isolation

JADE: im a human!

JADE: or at least, i started out that way

JADE: even if i had the powers of a first guardian, my brain still worked in modules of human pattern recognition!

JADE: three years is a long time for a human teenager, i dont care how many of her molecules are made of a god!

JADE: OH MY GOD STOP NARRATING!

JADE: who are you even talking to?

JADE: audience?

JADE: ugh, this is so annoying, i cant tell if youre being serious

JADE: your voice is impossible to read and i cant see your face

JADE: oh

JADE: well thanks

JADE: thats better

JADE: youre right that i am being silly, and i didnt mean to start a slap fight over who has suffered more

JADE: clearly you have been through a lot more than i could ever possibly imagine

JADE: youre the same callie who talked to me and jane when we were unconscious back in the game, right?

JADE: theres just a lot of everybody running around and i guess i havent been keeping the internal tally that i should have

JADE: but i think it is a very natural thing to be silly when you are used to being able to control your own body, but now cant

JADE: so i will stop yelling at you

JADE: but i reserve the right to start yelling again in the future if i have a good reason

JADE: ...okay?

JADE: do you actually know that?

JADE: do you actually know that im doomed to pine over dave and karkat across every iteration of reality?

JADE: like, can you actually see that?

JADE: because youre a space player, like i am.

JADE: i know that you are more powerful than me, but i dont think you can see other timelines any better than i can

JADE: so i think you are just being dramatic

JADE: for the “audience”, whatever the heck that means

JADE: heheh

JADE: i have never been particularly tamable, and my consciousness is huge!

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #jade harley #homestuck^2 act 1 #page 147 #page 148 #page 149 #page 150

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reignybaby · 3 months

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when i research splitting on someone in bpd it usually, in summary, describes it as loving them & idolizing them pre-split but hating & demonizing them post-split. and though that is.. well... sort of true to an extent, as obvious splits are all different for everyone and it might not be that intense or that exact feeling but i wonder many things about that.

i liked my dog when i first got her, loved her. she was my lil buddy who bit the piss outta me but she was wicked right? BAM! split. on a dog. for no reason. now shes a bit annoying to me but ive grown that connection with her again. see how not-so-complicated or deep that split is?

however,

oh my god i adored my boyfriend! i didnt really much care for how much he devalued and mistreated me, then love bomb me right after (with no apology). he was my fp, and nothing he could say or do would make me hate him. it built up and built up until i FINALLY split. but for some reason instead of feeling guilty about it, i was proud of myself for splitting. i could finally easily leave without feeling some type of way!

the question at hand is: when i split on an abuser who just so happens to be my fp, am i demonizing them or are my rose coloured glasses off (seeing them for who they are)?

i dont trust a lot of the things i think throughout my day because i change thought patterns faster than the moon can go through all of its phases.

but i trust myself when i have a new opinion on others, even if its due to a split. i have so much trauma caused by people i found myself attached too, i learned who to trust and who not too, and i found splitting to kind of assist in that too. its like my mind will notice my FP is a meanie and will split on em. (ik thats not how it works but why not make myself believe that)

big issue though: after i split on, i distanced myself and TRIED to take my time healing from him. without even breaking up with him. he finally noticed i stopped talking to him and now hes trying to be better.

like i love the effort, i would, if i currently didnt feel like you ruined my life lmao

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heavyskysystem · 4 months

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cederic going on a loooong fucking tangent

like really fucking long, but hey, getting his feelings so unfiltered I wont say no to

cederic is saying "I could also say woe is me ill always life in her shadow. But ive learned that crying about it doesnt use me anything. Esp when I love you that much and care for you, and dont remotely share his opinions on you. I dont know why he had to see you in such a negative light. youre wonderful. youre full of promise. youre allowed to be a host with weaknesses, youll figure it out. Thats how I know you, youll always figure it out. I honestly dont think im as formed as you are either, and id take a long time to develop enough to take on a full life, but honestly I dont even want to. just being who I am is enough. I get to be around you. I get to speak to others if I want to. I dont know how horrible this felt for joshua, but as I split off from him I like to think.. that I dont know, why I think youre so wonderful when he thought youre so shit. Maybe he pretended to dislike you to keep up his little charade. But now im here and I wont let that asshole hurt you again. And I know im far from perfect. I know im not as horrible as I used to be, I got a little better. But id never stoop as low as him and use our own feelings as a stick to beat you with. I did not inherit his massive emotional pain, but id like to think hes half to blame for still being in it himself. Because my own fears got better when I let you help me, when I let you do your thing. I got better too when I allowed you to be happy again, I am dependent on you, I am like.. a .. pimple on your skin. Not able to have a full life without you. Adam maybe could have that, but most of us couldnt. Lilith maybe could have that, but most of us couldnt. I feel embarassed at anything ive done to you. Still do. I never want to be as bad as him, and I dont understand using our own pain to torture you. It shouldnt be that way. It was so nice when you cared for me, when you tried to ease the fears and pain I was in. Why wouldnt he choose being cared about by you and instead turn it into something he cant bounce back from, doing things he can never take back, just how I did things I can never take back. But I doubt youll give him a second chance unless youre forced to. He couldve had what I had, he couldve had your care, your love, and I also sabotaged this, I also denied it to myself with having to hurt you whilst you offered it so freely.. You know your friend is right, you really are that caring, that sweet to us? And we dont make it easy. But love will win. we will prosper. It hurts me to see you get so down on yourself. I want you to win. And itll be my win too when you do. I might not be always dependable when youre in pain and sometimes I just see a weakness in it to take advantage of because of how much I got from our abusers, but sometimes I just see someone to take care of too. And I know its confusing for you to never truly know. But you said im on a good way to become more dependable, and as uncomfortable as being seen as the good guy for the first time was, how much it scared me, I like to think its true. Youll make me a better person and ill still choose the way of least resistance and let you do most of the work, but ill do it

I wish I was kinder so I would like myself now. I think in the end youre right, right about people like us. We might enjoy the power, it might make us feel like gods, but fuck do we hate ourselves. Youve always been right. Cause I cant love myself when im so horrible to you.

I feel like crying because youre right, everything I was afraid of, the intimacy, the lying close to you and listening to each others emotions, it really is the best. You always had this impulse to try to force me to do this. Or maybe I only experienced it as force because im such an arrogant shithead, though you can be quite annoying about it, repeat your little requests endlessly no matter how often I tell you no. But you were right, this does feel so good now that im not as afraid of it. This does feel priceless. I know, I know from your perspective it was a cute little request and you didnt force me. But honestly I am not protesting that you forced it, like I said, it did me good.

Youre more often right than you arent and its better to listen to you.

Im not trying to write a book, in my opinion you could just not post it. I am glad I got it out of my system, but you could also post it if you want it in my tag. Go ahead. I wont yell at you over that. Ill smooch you.

#cederic #vent #maybe to be deleted later #maybe not

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nathan-rulez · 10 months

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vent ig? really long so probably skip

is it just me or is it so fucking hard to be a competently good person on here. I feel like I need to know all of this stuff and to drop any and everything bad I might be supporting and I need to drop my whole mindset that I've been taught but nobody is telling me how. I'd like to be good and up to date but theres so much history. Fuck I can't even tell if a source is fucking reliable because ive been gullible all of my life so I can't research shit like 'what companies are bad and why' or like 'why xyz is bad' and also stuff like 'stop doing this behavior its harmful!' when I don't even know how to do any of this??????? its so stressful right now and I feel like I'm just following another group of people without thinking for myself, like an AI. I have opinions, just not a lot of them. And the ones I do have are so fucking basic how am I supposed to develop my brain without even thinking for myself, a skill that can't even be taught. The most complex ideas I have are wasted on the media I enjoy, and it's still going along with the people who can actually form their own opinions about anything important. I'm literally such a blank slate because as soon as I started thinking about anything important everything went to shit so of course I stopped because it was too annoying but now I'm missing any ability to think for myself on like. political stuff. I understand my brain is still growing but by now people at least start to think about that stuff. I mean hell if the people my age can be openly homophobic and proud why is it so hard for me to understand stuff that's so simple and obvious? Hell, even googling it, it says people my age start doing like activism shit and here I am sitting on my ass not even knowing which of countless issues to care about. Im considering bringing back biodiversity but theres so many people posting about how shitty every company is, and when I try to find out on an intricate level, I just get into another rabbithole on knowing reliable news sources, which led me here. how tf am I supposed to know if a source is 100% factual or not like I wasnt there!! So then I used a bias checker but I had to see if that was factual and I couldnt check without knowing the way I was checking if jt was biased was biased on its own! So then I wasnt sure if bias was the same as factual, which is stupid. Someone can say facts and their opinions. It just might not happen often in media without one affecting the other. also not sure how to balance my opinions with my actual life without coming off as annoying. Which is why this acc even exists, to hide myself from my friends and people who could possibly hate me from what I reblog.

anyways TLDR I have no clue where to start learning any political stuff im interested in without going through some fucked up rabbithole that puts too much pressure. Also I don't want to bljndly follow others opinions but it seems to be one or the other and at least the second option doesnt make me mentally tired. anyways hope no one finds this but atp i dont really care

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frank---ly · 2 years

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(i don't ship period for exactly these bullshit arguments) did u know that like. people can be friends with people for a lot of reasons. i have friends who ship stuff i'm uncomfortable with (incl. batcest) we just like, don't talk about it. that's it. it's easy. and they ARE survivors (yes i have multiple friends like this IRL) like, maybe you need to go touch grass. my IRL friends got sent r@pe threats for writing things to cope with their trauma and they DID cw/tw for it so like. it's just exhausting to see this argument, i had to distance myself from my IRL friends in the online sphere because they lumped me in with "proshippers" nonsense. it's so dumb. i don't care, no one who's actually an adult gives a fuck. does it skeeve me out? yeah. but like people have... more than one interest and more than one reason that others enjoy hanging out with them. but then u get online and it all gets boiled down to "shipping" and it's like. exhausting. people just don't know how to interact online i s2g. get over urself. just hit the back or block button it's no that hard? same as i'm doing to u because i'm tired of seeing these fights on my dash, they bring up bad memories. like, ur responsible for what you consume online. ur a fucking adult. if u don't like something just like. ignore it. idfk. it's just pixels on a screen it's not that deep. art has always had upsetting content and it's ur job to consume or not consume it, same as like, idfk horror or whatever. i don't talk about grindhouse w my friends and they don't talk about batcest with me and it's golden, we are still friends. it doesn't fuckin matter once you log off. we still order pizza together and find movies we can agree on and do tarot readings like Who The Fuck Cares, only you actually.

i am not going to send r-pe threats to anyone actually fun fact? its not my fault that some weird puritanical antis sent u death threats so idk why youre framing it like its my fault when im not an anti, i just stated that i find it weird

ok so ur an adult and you said most adults dont care but why send a paragraph to a teenager on tumblr.com explaining how ur ok with being friends with proshippers (nothing wrong with that, i just dont personally want to be friends with proshippers for personal reasons) you clearly care

'it's just pixels on a screen' okay then surely than its ok for people to be sent r@pe threats because it's just pixels on a screen??? this argument is dumb and if it was just pixels on a screen than you wouldnt be so pissed i was stating my opinion :P

not an adult but i can use search functions thats not exclusive to people over the age of 18! but its still weird to me? like even if i filter it on ao3 its still weird to me that people enjoy seeing siblings kiss

ok good for you that ur eating pizza with proshippers i guess! but thats your opinion and i have mine! go off weird internet adult and do what ever the FUCK you want i dont care but why are you turning on anon to annoy me on this bright summer day

yeah idk man. just because you have an opinion does not mean that everyone else shares that opinion and if you went outside and said to like 10 people that you enjoy reading about siblings dating than im pretty sure at least 1 person would be weirded out but maybe thats just me

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