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#which leaves senior year because by then the project will be finished (I plan on making it my senior thesis) and so I can more easily
riverfigs · 3 months
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my school is hosting a conference and I was thinking of submitting something, but I honestly haven't written a lot this year and the one idea I have is too large and I haven't done nearly enough research for it. also it is not actually written lmao
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fastcardotmp3 · 2 years
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Thinking about Eddie and how it probably takes him some time to figure out what he wants from life after having his whole worldview sent toppling and very nearly dying in an alternate dimension.
Like after he gets his GED it's odd jobs and moving town to town looking for a place that isn't put off when they do a background check and find out what he'd been accused of (no matter that he was cleared of all charges) and it's changing his last name and just surviving for a while rather than chasing down any sort of passion projects.
Maybe he tries the music thing out a few years in, figuring people probably care less about who's playing a gig so long as they know their way around a guitar, but he's still young and stupid and traumatized and it becomes very clear to everyone putting in the effort to stay in touch with him that he's about to be taken majorly advantage of by the industry so that's kind of a bust. He gets out as fast as he can, can't face the reality of his name ending up in the press anymore than it already has for Wayne's sake as much as his own.
And it's hard. It's messy and it's survival and it's just a lot for a guy who never really planned to still be alive this many years after that guitar solo in the Upside Down but he has to stop running around the country at some point and hey, Chicago's as good a place as any right?
Robin's working on her Master's out there and Nancy's at the Herald kind of kicking all kinds of journalistic ass. Steve just finished up his degree after floundering a bit like Eddie for a few years there when all the head trauma caught up to him and chronic tinnitus finally started turning into hearing loss and he's working at a school for HOH and Deaf kids now, genuinely actually thriving.
And Eddie feels a little bit like he's still the third-try senior at Hawkins High because what has he done? Lots of false starts and changed minds and spontaneous moves cross-country because he got too restless being in one place for too long, what has he really done?
He moves to Chicago, though, gets a job at a bookstore which is really far from the worst gig he's had in the past five or six years and it also just so happens to only be a handful of blocks away from the Art Institute where he happens to know one of the top undergrads.
The first time Will Byers comes in it might as well be because Steve is dragging him by the ear, because Eddie's only lived here three weeks but Steve has spent every day of that time making sure Eddie is getting settled and acclimated and has people. Almost like he's worried about Eddie leaving again.
Almost like he wants Eddie to stay.
And he drags Will Byers into the bookstore, eggs them into catching up outside of the Monster Hunter Reunions Joyce tries to make happen around major holidays. And then he does it again. And again.
It's Steve and Will bringing him lunch or bringing him coffee when it starts getting cold in the windy city and Eddie is loathe to admit it, but it's nice. It's not some big revelation, it's not Eddie's chance to change the world or anything, but he's got people around who keep making him aware that they're around and he's more settled than he's maybe ever been.
And then one day it's--
"Hey, Byers, you tell Ed about that thing you've been working on?"
If Eddie's hands weren't busy designing a killer fantasy display (if he does say so himself) he would be noticing the sly smugness in Steve's shoulders. He would know this was a set-up. He would just know.
The thing Will is working on is a graphic novel.
The thing Will is working on is a fucking metal ass premise of a graphic novel, taking no shortage of inspiration from the kid's quite frankly too insane for fiction experiences while still somehow putting so much of his own voice into it and Eddie is obsessed, Eddie is enthralled, Eddie is--
"Would you mind giving me feedback sometime? It's just-- I've got all these ideas, but I never know how to streamline them. You were always so good at that as a DM-- making everything make sense, you know?"
On that day, Eddie is mostly just honored that Will sees him for more than a guy without any formal creative writing education and trusts him enough to look at his work.
A matter of weeks later, Eddie is somehow not just giving feedback, he's basically a co-author. They use the big empty wall above Eddie's couch in his tiny studio apartment for storyboards and beat notes and it's on accident, the way Eddie finds this thing he loves.
Except for the fact that it's only an accident for him.
"You're such a fucking meddler, you know that?" he says to Steve over beers at Steve's apartment one Friday afternoon after gushing over Will's new art drafts for the book for approximately 45 minutes straight.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Steve smirks, not even trying to hide it.
"Oh, come on. Will told me he came to you asking if you thought I'd be interested in helping out and you came up with this elaborate slow-burn plan. The gig is up, Harrington, I'm in your head."
Steve just telegraphs his movement as he reaches up and shuts off his hearing aid, "Sorry, I can't hear you, man. Maybe if you wrote it in a book for me, drew some pictures--"
Who would really blame Eddie for kissing him on the mouth?
Someone needs to shut that guy up every once in a while.
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stackthedeck · 2 months
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THE TEACHER AU?!?! LMAO I'm a sucker for em but Ted falling first? Or is that just from his perspective?
okay so here's what i'm thinking for this au, there's probably never that oh i'm in love moment from either of their perspectives. there's an "oh i can trust this new guy" moment for ted but I want them to settle into their usually silly friendship
Mr. Carter and Mr. Kord are the teachers that go hard for spirit day, they are the accomplices to the senior prank, they are the teachers that volunteer to get pied in the face for fundraisers.
Mr. Kord is also the teacher that doesn't have late work deductions because it takes him ages to grade your stuff and hey he knows his students they're all also taking a million AP classes, the content is hard so he'll make the classroom producers easy.
Mr. Carter is that social studies teacher. We've all had that teacher at one point. They're usually a coach, super funny and joking around, doesn't do any intense projects, but you feel like you've learned something and actually look forward to being physically in class. You guys remember those teachers? Yeah that's Booster. He's probably reusing the slides from the last history teacher and he's just reading them off and doesn't really pause for questions (because his origin is the same he got suspended from college for a gambling scandal he doesn't know the content or the pedagogy) but he gives grace to all his students and grades easy. Is this a good way to teach? no, but he has high expectations for his students in other ways.
I think Booster and Ted have their like "oh god I'm in love with this idiot" moment when they're at school late grading papers and Ted is helping Booster because obviously this guy didn't pay attention during student teaching god who writes a lesson plan like this. And then as they're leaving, Ted just leans over and kisses him like it's the easiest thing in the world. they both go bright red, don't say a word and leave. and they don't talk about it the next day and both of them are in agony thinking oh god what does this mean. but they're just normal buddies during the day, but it keeps happening anytime they're alone, just a quick kiss that feels so natural and right followed by panic. until one of them finally says fuck it and kisses back. which really starts the drama of the story because oh god there's paperwork and procedures for this and only after Booster and Ted have gone on a proper date does Booster come clean about actually not being licensed to teach technically
also Rip Hunter is there as a unreasonably smart and unreasonably annoying foster kid. He really should be in the advanced classes to keep him busy, but he's a foster kid that's be bounced from school to school, his gpa is ass so he's stuck in Mr. Carter's awful history class and oh god that's so over simplified it's basically wrong mr carter turn off the power point let me explain please! Booster finds out that Rip is being moved to a different home again at the end of the semester along with his older "sister" (fellow foster kid he's sharing a home with) Rani who just wants to finish her senior year. Thus begins the poorly thought out speed run of getting certified to foster which might involve breaking more laws.
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decafbat · 2 years
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8 for the artist questions?
8. What's an old project idea that you've lost interest in
ok really really long story but when i was in high school i had a big set of characters and a plan laid out for an animated short, that i ended up trying to do for my senior project (my high school did those. they could kinda be whatever you want.) it involved a possum named reuben who worked as a cook in a dilapidated Kowloon Walled City type setting. a terrible setting for the story i realize now. the characters feel plopped into a totally disconnected world. theres no thematic or lore reason i set it in a place like that, and the characters are all so entirely american lmao my little highschool self was just really interested in that kind of stuff i guess. his boss was an incompetent raccoon named pascal, and the plot involved reuben running an errand (buying some cinnamon) for the restaurant after a local celebrity, a bat named Flan, showed up. his order had cinnamon in it and pascal didnt want to have to make an incomplete dish for him because he probably had a huge crush on the guy. coincidentally reuben met up with his friend, a pidgeon named Mochi. (i wish id just leaned full on into the chowder style food names and given pascal a different name lmao idk why i didnt.) thats the gist of it, and i worked on it all throughout my senior year, though at least 80% of that work did not go into the actual animation because i planned it so incredibly poorly. most of my time went into the storyboards, which is the part i actually enjoyed the most.
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next, in an act of utter foolishness, i decided to tackle the project of drawing every. single. background. and mind you i did not know how to draw backgrounds. this took me months of time i could have spend animating, and i had to get help from my internet friends just to get it done in a timely manner. i ended up with. 81 BACKGROUNDS. THE AMOUNT ACTUALLY USED IN THE FILM? ABOUT 10. MAYBE.
i did all the voice acting myself, which is the only reason im not linking the final film here beyond general embarrassment over the quality. this was pre-transition and im not comfortable sharing how i sounded back then. in the end, with only a few months left in the year, i finally began animation, and it was quite a lot of fun. sadly, i was tackling all the scenes with no lip-syncing necessary first because i assumed lip-syncing would be very hard with my snouted characters. i didnt ever get to any lip-synced shots, but the scenes i ACTUALLY did get around to animating were a lot of fun.
with my unprepared hubris, i ended up with an 8-minute slideshow of inscrutable storyboard scans punctuated occasionally with animation. i would have preferred to edit the characters into the backgrounds i had worked so hard on, but i had to crunch insanely hard to assemble the final video near the end to meet the time limit, and gladly, covid-19 made it so only my family and teachers were present during the presentation, with my classmates present over a zoom stream, which eased a lot of the embarrassment. i still had to leave the room while the short played. gladly though, they loved it, and thought it was really really funny. i stated boldly that i would FINISH THE SHORT SOMEDAY AND SEND IT OUT TO EVERYONE. at the time i probably meant what i said. id been drawing reuben, pascal, flan and mochi in the corners of my homework every day for years, i was really really passionate about them, but after the school year ended something kind of shifted. coincidentally it lined up with my coming out as trans and drawing Cath for the first time. i lost interest very quickly after that, and my parents were pretty mad that id decided to abandon the project. i guess the pressure probably got to me too. i was burnt out and even i was aware of how messy and flawed the story had come out. i didnt really draw them ever again after that except for a few times. leaving the project behind also ended my hopes of becoming an animator one day, my dream up until that point. it was probably the biggest shift in my artistic direction ive ever had, and im happy that shift happened. even though i left those characters behind almost entirely, they helped me become the person i am today. this of course involves all the times i drew reuben with boobs and thought “this is normal right? its normal that im drawing whats essentially my sona as a girl, right? its normal that i think about reuben transforming into a girl so often right?”
thanks for the question, you definitely landed on one of the ones i had the most to say about lmao, its nice to get to talk about this old abandoned project every once in a while. id still love to answer more if ppl wanna go back and read over that ask post.
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ahiddenpath · 7 months
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Life Talk
Tone summary:
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Life
I'm lowkey a wreck???? Is that a thing? I think you know what I mean. I get up and do the things, but emotionally everything is like AHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
First World Problems
So I've been saving for a bathroom reno for... I don't even know how long, years and years. We have a sum that I thought was pretty substantial??? We went to a showroom and I picked a bunch of stuff I didn't like bc that is what they had. My inspiration for my bathroom is sea glass, and the showroom had neutrals only. Like, the kind of bathroom reno you do to flip a house, but on a much nicer scale.
Anyway, we had y money. Our estimate was y + (y*46%). I mentioned that our estimate made sense about 3 years ago, and the designer said, "Yes, 3 years ago your estimate would be about 6% higher than your budget of y." Meaning there has been a roughly 40% inflation of their services/materials over the last 3 years.
Okay, so like, I get it. I have a home, this is a first world problem. But it also isn't? Because like... What if your pipes burst, and you need to redo your bathroom? Now it's 40% more expensive than it was 3 years ago, through no fault of your own.
It's like everything I was saving for, everything I tried to do... The goal post dramatically leaped in a short timeframe. I'm so frustrated. I'd put it off, but apparently the forecast for this type of goods/services is further unprecedented inflation next year, of course.
I've also spent the whole damned weekend on this, because today, my husband made a 3D model of our bathroom, and I picked stuff I actually like. So like- I haven't done any chores or creative stuff or relaxing. My husband just asked me to get on a call with our two closest friends from out of state to plan a meet up, and I just about burst into tears. I just can't handle more mental load. I don't want to be the person who turns down doing things (that I can reasonably afford) because I'm so overwhelmed, but that's where I am.
Work
It's weird because lately, work has been... A bit better? I take lunches. I leave on time, or even half an hour early. But I'm so beyond burnt out from those few months where I worked closely with someone and did my work plus half of his, or more.
This is a weird thing to say, I know, but I had an epiphany when I was talking to my hairdresser yesterday, lmao! I was telling her all the stuff I did this year at work, and she was like- um, that sounds like a lot? Like really amazing?
And it's true. This year, I generated a type of protein that no one in my company has been able to make. I closed out a project my senior has been trying to do for almost the whole year- I did it in two weeks. I've been taking on and wrapping up lingering projects, all of which I had no clue how to do. My boss calls me The Closer.
And through all of this, I've felt like an underperforming idiot, because I didn't know the skills needed for anything and I struggled and asked a million qs and was anxious all the time. But the people who did have the skills and background couldn't (wouldn't?) do it, and I did.
The place itself is still a massive dumpster fire of chaos. But I'm doing well, except... I'm always given tasks I don't know how to do, and often, no one in my group knows, either. It's all brand new stuff or finishing stuff other people couldn't get done. That is so much extra mental load and stress compared to doing tasks I know how to do.
Creative Life
I've been doing Nanowrimo. Until yesterday, I was doing and feeling great. I wrote all of 83 words yesterday, and 0 so far today, lmao! I'll... try.
I still feel weird/unsure about sharing my work. I'm trying not to focus on that, and instead focus on enjoying creating. Right now, I'm really overwhelmed in general, though.
Fearing for the Future
I'm at the age where if I want to have biological kids, it's uhhhh it's at that "clock is ticking" point. But I'm barely handling myself as I am, without a kid, and stuff keeps getting wildly more expensive. I try to remind myself that I have an anxiety disorder, so my fears are augmented, but...
It really feels like, at this moment, this world isn't fit to bring a kid into. It feels like a lot of the stuff considered normal for a middle class person like twenty years ago is just... Off the table now.
Despair doesn't help anyone, you know? No point languishing on it. But also, uh, it feels very real? I'm sure people think about this a lot lately, so I don't want to catastrophize at length. I guess I'm just sharing that it's on my mind.
I hope you're all well and hanging in there. Please try to take care of yourselves <3
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187days · 1 year
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Day One Hundred Sixty-Six
My day did not start out very well. I spilled coffee on my dress, had to change, and was late to work as a result. I mean, I still made it in before the morning bell, and Block 1 is my prep block anyhow, but I was later than I should have been. 
Things got better after that, though. My World students presented their projects, which were good in Block 2 and excellent in Block 3 (because students were able to make connections between each other’s work rather than leaving that up to me), so I was happy about that. After each group presented, students got to work on a multi-day assignment about another current word issue (Taliban rule in Afghanistan, the US-China trade war, the Uyghur genocide, far-right extremism, the drug trade, North Korea’s dictatorship, the Israeli-Palestinian conflict). They’re reading/viewing materials about the issue they choose, then answering a set of questions. They can move at their own pace, but I did add suggested calendars to each assignment to help keep them on track to finish by Friday.
There were guests in APGOV today- three of our local state reps- and Mrs. R’s class joined mine for the Q&A, which was great fun. Students were a bit shy, at first, but then they started putting their hands up. They asked about education, housing, conservation, LGBTQ+ rights, the FSP, and more. It was awesome, and, as always, I’m super grateful elected officials take the time to come to class.
At track practice, the team took part in an epic tradition: the obstacle course. Coach K’s been retired for a few years now, but he still comes back each spring to set up this crazy course in and around the stadium. With Coach T on the mic to egg them on, our athletes competed for a gift certificate to the very popular local bagel shop. They also all brought in five bucks, and ordered a bunch of pizzas, so after the obstacle course we all lay out by the high jump apron, had a pizza party, celebrated the season so far… We also honored our seniors since the home meet we’d planned to do that at got rained out. It was so good. 
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cupofteaguk · 4 years
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on the road (to you)
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summary: as a young adult, one of the strangest revelations is the discovery that peers of yours from past fragile college years are getting married. so imagine your shock and excitement upon receiving a wedding invitation. there are, however, two problems: (1) you are a poor early-20s recently employed adult just beginning to adjust to your 401k plan, and (2) the only available ride to the wedding comes in the form of Jeon Jungkook—friend of a friend, attendee to that aforementioned wedding, and your old college crush. 
pairing: jungkook x fem!reader
genre: roadtrip au, strangers to lovers au | fluff/angst 
warnings: recreational alcoholic consumption, definitely not an accurate representation of how a road trip might actually be, mentions of anxiety + insecurities, very minor book reference to: The Night Circus, equally minor movie references to: Mission Impossible and The Princess Bride because I have a problem, light makeout sessions, talks of DTR (define the relationship), some angst but this is me so there’s a happy ending. 
word count: 27k 
a/n: a birthday present for the one and only Jeon Jungkook, whom I love and respect so much and only wish the bestest of days for. Partly inspired by Taylor Swift’s song “invisible string” +  a love letter of sorts to my own old high school crush for whom my memory of him helped build Jungkook’s character. This also turned out way longer than I ever wanted it to be lol oops! 
update: i was actually able to do a writer’s audio tag on this fic!!! check it out if you want to hear about the behind the scenes process that went into writing this fic <3 
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When you land a job in the months following your college graduation, you feel as if you are on top of the world. How could you not? After all, the norm that follows post-college is one of disappointment and constant hunts online to find job openings for any position that could suit your background and previous work experiences. It’s a fear that plagues lots of your friends, both those in college and out. It’s the same paranoia you had in the months leading up to graduation and the few months after graduation—in which your days were measured by the boxes you packed to move out of your tiny college apartment and into an equally tiny new apartment you currently share with an old roommate of yours, as well as the days you spent hunched over your computer and scrolling through job postings. 
You had gone through more than a handful of cover letters, resume submissions, and in person interviews before finally landing the job you currently have and have been working under for a month now. 
Throughout the course of the recent month, you’ve continued to secure certain moments that solidify the confidence that you’re finally becoming an adult. Sure, a barely functioning adult who mostly still uses the microwave to heat up your frozen Mac and Cheese—but an adult nonetheless. From learning how to pay your bills online, to realizing that grocery shopping was something you needed to make a conscious effort to do, along with going to and from your nine to five job with your coffee order in hand. 
All of those things have helped you feel like you were, perhaps, finally getting your life together. 
And then you receive the invitation in the mailbox. 
It happens when you unlock your box on a bright March morning, taking out the usual round of bills and fashion magazines until your fingers lock around an envelope bigger than the normal letter size. It’s much sturdier too. 
You don’t know what to think of the letter, until you bring the damn thing back into your apartment and rip the opening. The mere sight of the content inside makes you feel like the hand of life has just taken your figurine and moved you back a good twenty squares. 
The post in your hand reads: 
WITH GREAT JOY, IRENE AND SEOKJIN REQUEST THE HONOR OF YOUR PRESENCE FOR THEIR WEDDING CELEBRATION ON THE DAY OF MAY 25TH. COCKTAILS, DINNER, AND DANCING TO FOLLOW. 
There’s a date at the bottom of the invitation. As you line the date up with your calendar, you realize that you have a week to RSVP to the event. 
You toss the envelope onto the counter in the kitchen just to glare at the cardstock, maybe to convince yourself this is a dream or at least convince yourself that it’s normal for your friend from college to be getting married even when you have yet to land a successful relationship of your own. 
You aren’t as close with Irene as you used to be, but the memory of your friendship is still at the forefront of your mind. The pair of you met during your final year of university, when you were assigned to work together for one of your many senior projects and immediately clicked. The months you spent in her apartment and vice versa pulling out all-nighters in desperate attempts to finish your project definitely earns you an invitation. At the very least, you are happy to see that Irene: bright and smart and funny, is getting married. 
Not only that, but getting married to Seokjin. He’s a year older than you and Irene, but those two met when he was still enrolled and have been inseparable ever since. You don’t know relationships that well, but you know them enough to recognize that Seokjin and Irene were what everyone called the ‘endgame’. In truth, it was only a matter of time before you were to receive one of these from them. 
But did she really have to one-up you like this? Not that it’s a competition. However, it does leave a funny feeling to see someone the same age as you display a much more put together handle on life. You groan at the thought.
“What’s got your panties in a twist?” Karly asks. 
You turn to your roommate. She’s seated at the kitchen table, books out and everywhere as she looks over at you. Karly: fellow alumni, graduated from her undergrad program early to go straight into pursuing her master’s degree. She’s a busy bee. You wave the envelope. “Irene is getting married.” 
Her eyes widen. “Ah shit, no way?” She takes the paper that you offer to her and looks over the invitation. “Damn, I knew it was only a matter of time before we started getting this stuff, but to actually see it happening…” 
You groan. “I know right!” You take the cardstock back from your friend. “It’s only been six months since we graduated, how could she be getting married already?” 
“Well, Irene did have a job lined up for her right after graduation,” Karly points out thoughtfully. She sees the look of bewilderment you give her. “What? It was on her Instagram.” 
You pout. “Of course Irene would have a job lined up like that.” You run a hand through your hair. “I mean, that’s good for her. Really good, actually…” 
Karly jerks her chin towards the envelope still in your hand. “So, are you planning to go?” 
“I don’t know, do you have plans that day?” You wave the paper. “I’m allowed a plus one.” 
Your roommate cracks a smile. “Are you asking me out? A little forward of you, we’ve been friends for so long…” 
You whine, shaking the paper and little more frantically. “Karly, this is important! I don’t want to go alone, I won’t know anyone!” 
She laughs. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. What was the date again?” 
You provide the date to her. You approach Karly’s place at the kitchen table and watch as she opens the calendar on her laptop. Immediately, you are overwhelmed by all the deadlines she’s got under practicality every date on the screen. Yet, a “wow” is the only thing you can say at the sight. 
Karly smiles, sparing you a glance over her shoulder. “One of the joys of being a grad student slash T.A. slash research assistant.” She scrolls down into May, and narrows her eyes upon May 25th. Underneath the date is an event—color coated to bright orange and typed out in all caps. CONFERENCE WITH PROFESSOR WONG. “Oh crap, I have a conference that day.” 
“No…” You whine some more, trailing off as you grab Karly by the shoulders and begin shaking. “Karly! You’ve left me out for the bears! What am I supposed to do?” 
Karly laughs as she lets herself be manhandled in this way. “I don’t know! Go and deepen your social life or something.” 
You stop shaking her and glare instead. “Is that a joke?” 
“What do you expect me to say?” She retorts, appalled by your answer. “Then don’t go.” 
You whine again. “But this is Irene, and I’ll feel bad for not going and congratulating her!” 
“Then go!” 
“But I don’t have a plus one!” 
Karly places her hands at her temples. “Oh my god, this is like the circle of stupidity with you. Then find a plus one! Or just don’t go!” She whirls around to face you. “I will help you find a dress if you decide to go. I will also sit with you on the couch and eat popcorn with you if you decide not to go.” 
You continue to pout, knowing that you deserve that gentle attempt at a lecture but still not liking the reason why you needed such a talking to. 
“Fine,” You eventually decide to say, sliding into the seat next to Karly and leaning forward to plant your entire upper body on the table. 
Karly laughs at your defeated posture. “Well, you have the rest of the week to make your decision.” 
She has a point. That doesn’t mean you have to like it. 
.
For the rest of the week the decision of whether or not you should attend the wedding becomes a weight in your mind. You spend the next few days pondering it, thinking over the pros and the cons. 
As overdramatic as it is, you think about it during work, when you’re partaking in your home workout routines, and even when you’re about to fall asleep. You do want to go, you really do. It’ll be the first time you attend a wedding that didn’t involve a relative, which feels like a big deal in your adult agenda mindset. And Irene is someone you wouldn’t mind spending an evening with to catch up. 
However, you wouldn’t get to spend the evening with Irene—after all, a wedding implies that she would likely be mingling with all of her guests and you would just be another attendee forced to find other means of entertainment. That’s where the plus one comes in handy. Except you don’t have a plus one. A slight problem. 
You sigh. Work is a little slow today, as you are also experiencing the afternoon slump in which your mind drifts away more often than usual. You find yourself with a small laundry list of tasks (such as emailing companies, working on drafts for releases, and trying to set up different appointments) but without the motivation to do those things right away. Because of that, your afternoon slump takes the form of opening airline services to find information and prices about flying to Irene’s wedding. It’s in her hometown, about a five hour flight time from here to there. 
You click on the various boxes that require information, finally allowing a search. As the search goes through, your eyes take in all the prices—both the amount to get there and to get back—and your lips part slightly at the totaling numbers. 
“Five hundred dollars?” You mutter to yourself. You’re not sure how this would work with budgeting, but you’re still trying to figure out how to balance the cost of AC, the internet, and how to eat appropriate meals at least once a day. You don’t have five hundred dollars to spend on an airplane ticket. A slightly bigger problem. 
You sigh again, resting your elbow on the desk and your chin in the palm as your eyes continue to scroll through the website. 
Behind you, fingers curl around the top of your cubicle. There is a silence between the two of you: him, merely observing, and you, completely oblivious, until he clears his throat. 
You jump, having not expected to be interrupted like this. A squeak leaves the back of your throat as you whirl around to see who is visiting you. “Jimin!” You exclaim, taking in the boy now perched along the wall of your cubicle. This is before you narrow your eyes. “Asshole, you scared me!” 
If you just started working here and learned that you’d be cursing out Park Jimin for startling you, that past version of yourself might have turned red, shocked, and nervous at the thought. A month ago, Jimin was that coworker—as friendly as friendly people come by. With his pretty eyes, perfectly soft pink lips, and freshly dyed brown hair, you had been immediately taken by his charm and helpful nature. 
Then the month went by, and you realized there were no romantic intentions on either end. Jimin then became your first friend in your new job. Albeit, he’s a nosy friend who enjoys asking questions and dragging you out to nearby bars and coming over occasionally with take-out, but a friend nonetheless. 
“Sorry!” Jimin says back, then he glares at you. “What are you doing over here anyways?” 
You shake your head. “What do you mean?” 
“What do you mean what do I mean? You’ve been sighing all afternoon.” Jimin pulls out a slip of paper from behind his back. “Fifty times in the last hour, I swear to god.” 
You straighten out of your seat to get a better look at the paper, unamused to find fifty tally marks across the surface. “You’re lying, there’s no way that I sighed fifty times in an hour.” 
“Of course you wouldn’t know, you’re the one doing all the sighing!” Jimin retorts, lowering his hand with the paper. “Is something up with you? Did something happen?” His eyes flicker to the monitor screen behind you and he frowns. “What the fuck? Are you moving away already?” 
You blink. “What?” 
He jerks his chin towards the computer. “You’re looking at flight prices.” 
“Huh?” You turn around, having completely forgotten about your previous predicament in light of discovering that Jimin counts your sighs. “Oh! No…” 
Jimin raises an eyebrow. “No, you’re not looking at flight prices?” 
You slide back into your chair, a silent invitation for Jimin to step further into your cubicle. You sigh again, and he holds the paper back up. Taking a pencil out of his pocket, he makes another mark. You look over at him upon hearing the pencil scratch and scowl. “Give me that!” You grab the paper from his hand. “I’m dealing with a crisis right now, don’t count my sighs!”
“Alright! Alright!” Jimin slides behind you and leans forward to get a better look at your computer screen. “So where are you moving to this time?” 
You press your lips together. “I’m not moving away. A friend of mine from college is getting married. I’m just trying to see how expensive it would be to fly over there.” 
He whistles at the five hundred dollar price in your cart. “That’s pretty expensive.” 
“I know!” You groan, throwing yourself further back into your chair. “I wouldn’t mind going, but I don’t have a plus one. And as you can see, flying there would be a challenge on my wallet.” 
Jimin hums at that. “Well, regarding your plus one problem, I wouldn’t mind going with you.” 
You turn to look at him. “Really? You’d go across the country and endure an entire evening with your coworker and her old college classmates?” 
He shrugs. “If you’re desperate, I’ll keep my offer around.” He actually pouts this time. “Are you implying that you see me more as a coworker than a friend? After all the times we’ve hung out outside of work!” 
Your eyes widen slightly, having not thought of that. “No, no, Jimin, I mean—yes, I do see you as a friend now but we met as coworkers so I just think of you as a coworker first—!” You’re rambling. 
Jimin interrupts by patting your shoulder, the corner of his lips quirked up into a smile. “I’m just messing with you.” 
You shake your head again. “Asshole,” You grumble, returning your attention back to your computer. 
Jimin is still mid-laughter behind you. “Anyways, yeah, like I said. If you’re desperate to go, I wouldn’t mind going with you. But deciding how to get there is a different question entirely.” 
You turn to glare at your friend for a moment. “I’ll let you know.” 
He nods, before his lips part and he’s snapping his fingers. “Oh yeah! I wanted to ask you something.” 
He backs up, allowing you enough space to turn around fully and face him. “Okay, what’s up?” 
Jimin grins, lifting his leg up to nudge your chair slightly. “I’m going out tonight—you should come with.” 
You don’t even give this a second thought. Your lips turn into a downwards curl as you shake your head. “Nope.” 
Jimin looks appalled. “Why not? Didn’t you have fun the last time we went out?” 
“If ‘fun’ to you is trying to drag your drunk ass home and staying the night to make sure you wouldn’t choke on your vomit…” You grumble, trying not to shudder at the memory. It has only been a few days since that ‘fun’ time. 
“I told you that sometimes I overestimate my abilities, and I already apologized for that,” Jimin points out, although he does have the decency to look guilty for that mess. He perks up again. “But this’ll be different, I promise. I’m meeting up with some friends and we’re just gonna catch up. It’s at one of the quieter bars uptown: no loud DJ, no bright lights, no bottomless rum and coke. Promise. It’ll just be a lot of socializing.” He watches you hesitantly. Socializing has never been your strong suit. “And finger food.” 
The mention of food does make you look up towards him—your first sign of interest towards something. However, another thought weighs you down. “Are you sure you even want me to go?” You ask after a moment. “I mean, this is a catch up with friends. Wouldn’t I be intruding?” 
“Not at all!” Jimin brushes off, waving away your concern with his hand. “I told you, it’s a socializing thing. Besides, my friends are always bringing someone along. They were asking me when I’d have a friend tag along, so I thought you’d be a good selection.” He notices you still frowning. “C’mon! It’ll be fun. When I’m not vomiting over your shoes, I’m good company. And I promise I won’t be vomiting this time.” 
You stare at Jimin for a moment longer, contemplating his words. This is very true. Jimin is an ideal friend to have during social gatherings—he’s good at keeping a conversation going so you don’t have to shoulder the weight alone, he’s good at reading when you’re in a good mood and when you’re ready to go home, and he’s excellent at keeping unwanted attention away. You know this. Jimin knows that you know this. 
It takes one curl of your lips for Jimin to grin, knowing that he has convinced you. “Okay!” He says, finalizing the decision without having to hear the actual answer from you. He pats your knee. “We’ll take the subway after work, it’s just a few stops down.” 
If your mind conjures up any second thoughts, Jimin leaves before you are able to express them. 
.
True to Jimin’s word, the pair of you step into a subway heading westbound as soon as you’re finished with work. It’s much later in the day now, the afternoon sun has changed into a night sky with a chill spring breeze to match. The carts are filled with the evening crowd of adults, all done with another day of work and finding enjoyment for the rest of today by returning home or seeing friends. It’s a rarity that you would fall under that latter category, but the thought makes you excited nonetheless. 
“Alright, so you wanna tell me a little bit about these friends that I’m seeing tonight?” You ask, gripping the handlebar above you but leaning towards Jimin so he can hear what you’re saying over the noise of the subway speeding down the tracks. 
Jimin grins. “They’re just some friends I grew up with. We like to get together once a month to catch up and hang out, since everyone is so busy with their own lives.” 
You smile back. “That’s actually really sweet of you guys, to plan hangouts once a month.” 
He lightly flicks your forehead. “Hey, are you saying I’m normally not very sweet?” 
“Well, not right now!” You protest, hand over your forehead. “That hurt.” 
“You’re being a baby!” Jimin retorts back. 
The pair of you continue to bicker like this until your stop is announced over the intercom. Jimin halts the further insults being thrown at each other as he gestures towards the approaching station, as seen through the window of the subway. 
“This is our stop,” Jimin says to you, allowing you to step out onto the platform first. He joins behind you right after, leading the way as the subway’s three chimes signal the closing of the doors. There’s a breeze that follows, running through your hair and clothes as the subway zooms away to its next stop. The station itself is crowded, filled with groups of friends and individuals carrying on with the rest of their evening, overall looking so lively and you can feel yourself feeding off their energy. 
With a gesture pointing up the stairs that’ll take the pair of you to ground level, Jimin leads the way. You make your way through people, following Jimin’s guide until you’re both exiting the station and entering the world of your new stop. It’s another area of the city you work in, so the change in scenery isn’t too dramatic—but it’s a place more catered towards restaurants, shopping areas, and hang-out sections. The bright neon signs protrude out from the building, flashing the various products or services the specific building offered: from manicure care to corner ramen shops. 
“C’mon, let’s hurry!” Jimin calls back to you, picking his pace up slightly. He’s not running, but his long legs make it harder for you to keep up. “Everyone is already there.” 
The pair of you continue to pace down the sidewalk, past the crowds of people waiting to eat, people lingering outside of clothing stores. Finally, Jimin slows down near a restaurant. He looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re still behind him, before entering the establishment. He mentions something about knowing where their seats are, before continuing deeper into the restaurant. 
As you look around, the place does look like a restaurant slash bar—not as crazy as some of the bars Jimin takes you with the intention of actually getting drunk, but there’s still a bar here and there’s still alcohol being shared heavily. It’s the same demographic of early 20s, young adults with friends, but there are actual tables and chairs and booths set up like a restaurant. So you suppose Jimin hadn’t been lying to you about this. 
“There they are!” Jimin says to you, as you look up and follow Jimin’s finger to the table in the far corner that is completely filled with the exception of two seats. You vaguely make out the back of some heads, most belonging to boys, before your eyes land on one of the boys facing you and Jimin. He’s sitting at the far end of the table, currently laughing brightly at something one of the boys at the table has said. For all intents and purposes, the boy is cute. Extremely cute. When he laughs, his eyes and nose crinkle and his lips spread into a wild smile—and brings out the dimple on his cheek. He looks like the embodiment of all your ideal types mashed into a singular being. 
All of those things. Yet, that is not the reason why you are staring. None of those things come close to why you stop dead in your tracks, why your heart drops in your chest, why your eyes widen. Even with the shitty lighting in this restaurant, you are one hundred percent positive. “Jimin!” You manage to choke out, having enough well power to grab onto his hand seconds before he is able to make himself and yourself known to his friends. 
He whirls around, wide-eyed and curious and worried. “What? Is everything okay?” 
You shake your head. The room feels too small. “I think there’s something I should tell you—!” 
“Hey, is that Jimin? Jimin!” Your voice is very easily drowned out by the sound of another, much louder voice that seems to boom through the restaurant. 
Jimin turns back around in time to face one of the boys from the table who has gotten out of his seat. You are able to see him from over Jimin’s shoulder—a tall boy with messy unkempt hair and a boxy smile. Jimin greets him with a “Taehyung!” before the boys embrace. “Taehyungie,” Jimin continues afterwards, turning around so both are able to face you. “This is Y/N, she’s a coworker of mine.” 
Taehyung grins, a friendly gesture that makes you relax. But only slightly. “Y/N! It’s nice to meet you, I’ve heard a bit about you from Jimin. All good things, I promise.” 
“W-Well, that’s good to hear,” You manage shakily, eyes nervously darting to the boy at the end of the table, who has stopped his conversation and is now looking at you and Jimin. 
“Let me introduce you,” Jimin says, breaking your concentration as he rests a hand on your shoulder. He points right at the boy at the end of the table, who is still staring at you. His eyebrows are furrowed together. You want to bury yourself alive. “That one over there is—!” 
A lightbulb seems to go off in the boy’s head. His face breaks out into a smile as he points at you. “Hey, Y/N!” 
Jimin looks taken aback at the fact you are being recognized by someone at the table. His hand lowers as he looks over at you. 
You, however, cannot focus on Jimin. You can only focus on the boy at the end of the table, the boy currently smiling over at you with all the light in his eyes, the boy who makes the memories flash through your mind. From that, the best you can manage is a tiny smile. “Jungkook!” 
Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. Where do you even begin with him? 
You met Jungkook during your second year of university. He had been an arts major (you were not) and yet, your paths crossed multiple times throughout the quarter as a result of sharing many general education classes together. You even were forced to pair up on a project for one of those aforementioned G.E. classes. Neither of you ran in the same social circle, but that didn’t change how sweet, funny, charming, endearing, easy-going, friendly, smart, and nice Jungkook was. It was very easy for him to make friends, very easy for him to go out of his way to say hi to you in the library or in class or in the cafeteria, and very easy for him to strike up a basic conversation with you. 
Because of that, it was very easy for you to fall for him—to develop a deep-rooted crush that went on for the rest of your university experience. You would use the term ‘friends’ very loosely when describing what your relationship with Jungkook had been. You had never hung out with him outside the context of school, never went out to eat with him, and never saw him again after graduation. Until now. 
Actually, ‘acquaintances’ would probably be a much more fitting term. 
“Hey, I haven’t seen you since graduation!” Jungkook is saying as he stands up from his chair and approaches you. As if on autopilot, you return the one armed hug he gives you. His smile, while still pleasant, holds a surprising tinge of shyness to it. 
“Woah, hold on a second,” Jimin interrupts, immediately pointing between Jungkook and you. “You guys know each other?” 
“Y/N and I went to university together!” Jungkook provides. 
Jimin looks like his eyes are about to fall out of his sockets. 
“We’ve known each other since second year,” Jungkook continues. He looks over at you. “I didn’t know you know Jimin.” 
“Uh…” You forget how to speak. You’re too busy looking at Jungkook as if you haven’t seen him for years. In a way, it feels like that. Seeing people from college outside of college after a graduation ceremony is like meeting them again for the first time—most of them develop a more independent look. Some look like their life is seconds from falling apart. Some look much happier without the institutional pressure to secure classes and grades and internships. Sadly for you, Jungkook falls under the latter category. Did he always have that twinkle of starlight in his eyes? 
“Y/N and I work together,” Jimin provides, seeming to realize that you weren’t going to answer Jungkook’s question. “She started working about a month ago.” 
“Oh, that’s cool,” Jungkook replies, still looking at you. It is then he seems to notice that the three of you are standing in the middle of the restaurant. Although you are not distracting any patrons, the workers probably don’t appreciate it. “How about we sit down? We’ll be able to catch up more!” 
Jimin seems to regain control of the situation quicker than you do, because he nods at Jungkook. “Let me introduce her to everyone, then we’ll join you.” You look over to where Jungkook had been sitting and immediately notice the previously empty two chairs right across from him—like fate, or something terrible like that. 
So you watch as Jungkook makes his way back to his seat, and Jimin starts to guide you around the table. He only drops a name. Surprisingly, he doesn’t linger, he merely takes you to the next person. It only takes you a second to figure out why. 
“You didn’t tell me you know Jungkook,” Jimin hisses in between the time it takes to travel in between people. 
“I didn’t know you knew Jungkook!” You hiss back. You smile and nod politely at the person Jimin introduces as Yoongi. “Seriously, you never mentioned him once!” 
Jimin only keeps his frustration for a moment before he’s introducing you to someone named Hoseok, a boy with a bright smile, the one who was making Jungkook laugh earlier. “Okay, fine,” He relents, the pair of you finally move to take your seats. “But what was that earlier?” 
“What was what?” 
“You were just staring at him! What, did you have a huge crush on him or something—?” Jimin accuses, but he stops. Just as the pair of you are about to sit down, Jimin parts his lips in realization. “Oh.” Then, he sends you an absolutely wicked grin. “Oh, okay.” 
Your eyes widen at him, murder in your eyes. “Jimin!” 
“So, Y/N,” Jungkook’s voice cuts through your little biting banter with Jimin. 
You whirl around to face Jungkook, eyes completely devoid of murder and voice several pitches higher. “Hi, Jungkook!” 
He smiles, such a wonderful little thing that makes your heart flutter in your chest. “Hi.” 
Jimin ducks his head to hide the fact that he wants nothing more than to burst into fits of laughter. 
“So how have you been?” Jungkook starts up. “I haven’t seen you since graduation. Since you landed a job, you seem to be doing well.” 
“I am!” You manage, only continuing to try and keep a handle on your heart and managing well enough this time. “There were a few months of just scrolling through job postings and writing cover letter after cover letter though.” 
Jungkook laughs, another beautiful gesture that makes you mirror his smile. “I definitely feel that.” 
“Well, what about you? What have you been up to?” You ask. “I think I saw on your Instagram and you were traveling around for a little?” 
His eyes light up at that. “Oh yeah! I don’t know if you remember Kim Mingyu from school?” You do. “Well, he and a friend of his got into some freelancing and had to do some traveling around to work on some filming. He asked me to come along because I actually have some photography experience. So that was a thing I did for a few months.” 
You nod, smiling. “No way! That’s so cool.” 
You do relax after a few conversational exchanges with Jungkook. He’s just as relaxed and mellow, yet friendly and polite as ever, and it’s easy to make conversation with him as it always has been. Eventually, you join in on the larger conversations with the whole table—touching on topics from your university experiences to tales from your new job. A lot of your role, however, falls to listening. Jimin’s friends are rowdy, funny, and out-going. They invite you in like you have been in this group for years—and are able to provide context on older memories they are revisiting. 
Most of your evening, however, is engaging in conversation with Jungkook. Occasionally, Jimin will join in, but he does spend most of his time laughing along to something his other friends are saying. Since you and Jungkook have always been friendly with each other, long conversations aren’t out of the ordinary. You just never considered how well you and Jungkook got along, how easy it would be to transition from topic to topic. 
“I am really glad that Jimin invited you along,” Jungkook explains brightly after the pair of you are done laughing following Jungkook’s tale of another fuck-ups with Kim Mingyu. “Makes you realize how small the world is.” 
“Oh, you should have seen her moping around earlier today,” Jimin interjects, choosing now of all times to insert himself back into your conversation with Jungkook. “She was sighing all afternoon—so maybe we should thank her misery that I decided to invite her along tonight.” 
Jungkook turns to you, a sympathetic look across his face. “Did you have a bad day today?” 
You try for a laugh, waving away Jimin’s words. “Jimin’s just overreacting. Actually, I found out a friend of mine from college is getting married, so I was trying to figure out my plan…” You start, trailing off as you look at Jungkook. “Wait, you didn’t know Irene, did you?” 
“I did.” His eyes widen as his lips part in realization. “Oh my god, you were invited to Irene’s wedding too?” 
“I was!” You exclaim, unsure whether you should be excited or even more nervous at the prospect of potentially seeing Jungkook at the wedding event. “Holy shit, this makes it an even smaller world. How did you know Irene?” 
Jungkook is still mid-giggle at the pure coincidence of everything. “We both knew Mingyu! This is so crazy. Are you planning to go?” 
You shrug. Jimin chooses to interject once more. “That’s what Y/N over here was sighing all afternoon over.” 
You whine as you look at Jimin. “No need to sell me out! Listen, Jungkook.” You turn back to the boy opposite of you, who is still gazing at you. “I’m sure you understand my current predicament.” 
“Sure.” 
“You know how expensive flights can be.” 
“Of course.” 
You fold your arms over each other and rest them on the table. “So, are you planning to go to the wedding?” 
He nods. “Most likely, yeah. I actually knew that the wedding was going to be happening soon, since Mingyu told me about it as soon as Irene got the ring. I ran into the flight problem pretty quickly too, so I decided to just drive to the event.” 
Jimin whistles. “Drive across the country, huh, JK? That must be a four day trip, or something.” 
“It was coming out to be,” Jungkook acknowledges with a nod. “But it’s okay.” He’s grinning, looking excited at the prospect. “I’ve never done a cross country drive before, so it was actually kind of exciting to plan the route. There are a few places I want to stop by and visit. I’m sure it’ll be fun.” Then, Jungkook turns back to you. “If you decide that flying would be too expensive, then you’re more than welcome to come along. It’ll be nice to have some company and not spend four days by myself.” 
Entirely on instinct, you start to laugh. You think he’s joking—how could you not? This is probably one of the longest conversations you’ve ever had with Jungkook. Like you’ve mentioned before, you wouldn’t consider him a friend. Why would he seriously try to invite you on a road trip?  “Yeah, I’m not too sure—I’ve never done a cross country trip before…” 
The conversation shifts pretty quickly as soon as you reply back to Jungkook. Hoseok asks you a question that drags your attention away, simultaneously allowing you to forget about Jungkook’s request. 
The end of the dinner happens soon after, when the bill has been paid and you suspect the long line of people outside waiting for a table are waiting for your party to be done. So venmo exchanges and money debts go around until each member of the table starts standing up one by one to make their move to exit the restaurant. 
You and Jimin are one of the first to leave. Goodbyes are exchanged along with the polite ‘it was nice to meet you’ phrase thrown around. Jungkook is mid-conversation with Yoongi, but he still gives you a quick hug of parting before you and Jimin exit the restaurant. 
The pair of you only make it out a few steps before there is a familiar voice calling your name. “Hey, Y/N! Y/N, wait up!” You stop and turn around, surprised to see Jungkook dashing out of the restaurant. He rests himself for a moment before he’s straightening back up to look at you. 
You try for a smile. “Hey Jungkook, what’s up?” 
He takes in a few more deep breaths to calm himself—either from the dashing he just did or to steel himself for the next question, you don’t know. “It’s about me inviting you to drive up to Irene’s wedding—I just thought I’d let you know it was a serious invitation. Having the company would be nice, and you wouldn’t be a burden to me, seriously. Besides, it’ll be fun to spend some time together.” 
“O-Oh,” You stammer, wringing your hands together. “I’m not too sure… I still have to think about it.” 
“Of course, of course,” Jungkook dismisses good naturedly. “Just thought I’d let you know, so you know that you do have options.” 
Although the offer makes you nervous, you cannot dismiss Jungkook’s thoughtfulness. You give him a more relaxed smile. “I really appreciate that Jungkook, thank you.” 
He smiles at your smile. “No problem! Actually…” He digs around for the wallet in his pocket and produces a little card. “Here’s my business card—my cell phone number is on here so just text or call if you decide to join me. Or,” He presses his lips into a more bashful smile. “You can just text me whenever for whatever reason. I just thought I’d let you know that it was good to see you again.” 
You take the card slowly, unable to look away from Jungkook’s face. He looks so genuine and shy that it doesn’t help your own racing heart. “It was good to see you too, Jungkook…” You return, albeit a little breathlessly. 
He smiles again, dimples pressing in his cheek (and your heart). He turns to Jimin “Oh yeah, nice seeing you too Park.” 
“Hey.” Jimin hits him on the shoulder. “I’m your hyung, you should show me more respect!” 
“My bad, my bad.” Jungkook doesn’t apologize though. His gaze flickers to yours one more time, gaze looking strangely hopeful. “I’ll see you guys around.” He walks backwards a few paces before turning around and returning to the restaurant. Maybe to see his other friends. 
Either way, it doesn’t matter. You are still screaming internally regardless—as shown through your red cheeks, widened eyes, and singing heart. Jimin will certainly never let you live this moment down. 
Now, you are screaming externally. You don’t even give a thought or an explanation. You simply walk into your apartment, nosedive for the couch, and start yelling into one of the throw pillows. 
There’s a rapid movement of footsteps coming from down the hallway almost immediately, one that grows gradually louder until the owner of the steps starts speaking. “Who the fuck is out there? I’ve played softball my entire life and therefore will not hesitate to drive this bat so far up your ass—oh, Y/N.” The voice lowers significantly, as does the threat level it emits into the air. “It’s just you.” 
You lift your face from the throw pillow, and immediately brush away at the hair that falls in your face. “What the fuck!” You croak, pushing yourself into a sitting position and pointing at the bat in Karly’s hands. “What are you doing threatening me with a bat? You’ve never played a game of softball in your life!” 
“Oh, this isn’t mine. It’s Soonyoung’s.” Soonyoung is Karly’s boyfriend from high school, who used to play baseball on the high school team. How Karly has her boyfriend’s baseball bat is a mystery, but it’s something you think you are better off not asking about. She places the bat down on the carpet next to the coffee table. “But I should be asking you the questions, you bitch! You scared the shit out of me!” 
You sigh, throwing your head to rest on the back of the couch. “Sorry, sorry. Had a crazy day.” 
Karly ponders this as she moves to take a seat next to you. “You seemed fine when you texted me about you getting drinks with Jimin. Did something happen during the dinner?” 
You straighten up again and grip Karly by the arm. “Okay, don’t scream.” 
“You mean like you did?” Karly retorts dryly. 
You shake her. “I’m serious!” When Karly doesn’t say anything, you take it as a sign to continue with your story. “I saw Jungkook.” 
Karly blinks, then grabs your arm right back. “Wait, Jeon Jungkook, as in the guy you’ve been crushing on since second year?” 
“Yes!” You whine, throwing yourself onto the couch all over again. 
“The one you had to work together on a project with and nearly cried even though you guys just had to submit a paper?” 
“Yes!” 
“The one who said hi to you in the library that one time and you tried to put your elbow on the table afterwards but you missed and hit your head instead?” 
You pause, scowling. “Okay, now you’re just being mean. Are you done?” 
Karly is laughing. “Oh my god. What are the chances of you seeing him now?” 
“There’s more,” You groan out. 
“Really? Honestly that yell could have been just for seeing him again and that would have made sense—!” 
You ignore her. “He’s friends with Jimin. He’s friends with Irene, too. He was invited to her wedding.” 
“Wait, Jimin is friends with Irene or Jungkook is friends with Irene—?” 
“He won’t pay for the flight though. It’s too expensive. I can attest to that.” 
Karly holds a finger up, trying to connect the dots. “When did you look up flight prices—?” 
“So he invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 
Karly frowns. 
You sigh. “Jungkook invited me on a cross country road trip to Irene’s wedding.” 
“Oh! Oh!” Karly’s eyes widen. “Oh my god, that’s huge. Are you gonna go?” 
“I don’t know!” You whine. “Jungkook mentioned it would be a four day drive to get there. I don’t know if I can survive four days in a car with him! We’ve never been that close, what if it gets awkward?” 
Karly ponders this. “I really don’t think it’s in Jungkook’s nature to be awkward with someone—especially someone he’s had a history with.” She sees the look of disbelief you give her. “Well, even if that history was really limited. What makes you think it’ll be awkward? Was it awful seeing him tonight?” 
“No!” You cry, straightening into a sitting position so your legs drape over the side of the couch. You force yourself to calm down. “It… it was pretty good actually.” 
Karly raises an eyebrow, amusement dancing in her eyes. “Really now.” 
“Yeah…” You reply, trailing off. “We sat across from each other during the dinner and we talked most of the night, surprisingly. I guess because we were sort of acquaintances we’ve always known about each other, so it wasn’t like we didn’t know how to ask questions to each other. And Jungkook… he’s easy to talk to as he’s always been and he’s so nice and positive and he has a dimple on his cheek when he smiles…” You finish slowly, noticing your racing heart that has come up as a result of this conversation and of your memory. You realize the predicament you’re in, further emphasized by Karly’s growing grin. You groan. “Shut up.” 
Karly looks like a Cheshire cat. “I didn’t say anything.” 
You grab onto one of the throw pillows and properly hit her in the face. “You’re saying many things right now, you bitch!” 
Karly takes the pillow from you and proceeds to whack you in the shoulder. “Not outloud!” 
“So you admit it!” You accuse, pointing at her. 
Karly yells. “Just admit you still have a crush on him!” 
Your groan turns into a cry. “Don’t say it outloud! Now I have to deal with it!” 
Your roommate sighs. “Bitch, I can tell you exactly how to deal with this. You’re gonna go on this road trip with Jungkook and see if you guys vibe—you honestly will not find a better way to discover your compatibility with him. If it works out, then you get more than a plus one to the wedding. If it doesn’t work out, just skip the wedding and take the first flight back home. Cut off your friendship with Jimin while you’re at it—it’s the only way to ensure you’ll never have to run into Jungkook again.” 
You pout. “That seems a little dramatic.” 
Karly thinks for a second, then she nudges you. “Remind me again about that quote your high school English teacher used to always parade around.” 
You stare at her for a moment, because you know exactly what point she’s trying to make. Still, you decide to humor her. And yourself. “‘You’ll never know if you’ll sink, swim, or float, until you’re willing to take the plunge’.” You level Karly with another gaze. Your friend has a point. You missed any chance to hang out with Jungkook during your college years—partly because your friend groups never intersected, but mostly because of your internalized fear of fucking up. But now that you are just a little older and just a little more versed in the art of conversing and befriending—maybe Karly is right. Maybe this is your chance to see if a different set of timing could make a difference. 
So you sigh. 
“I guess I should text Jungkook, huh.” 
Karly pats you on the shoulder. “Take the plunge, my dude.” 
.
You do take the plunge. You take Jungkook’s business card out from the pocket of your dress and dial the number. He expresses excitement—and also relief. 
These things lead up to the current moment. Eight o’clock in the morning: you lingering in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, your suitcase by the door, and a roommate keeping you company. 
You don’t realize how nervous you are until you get a text from Jungkook. 
Jungkook (8:03am): i’m here! u can buzz me up so i can help u with your stuff :) 
You (8:03am): it’s ok jungkook it’s just a suitcase. i’ll be down in a second! 
You pocket your phone, and Karly can read the expression across your face before you realize what is going on. She straightens up. “He’s here?” 
“Yeah.” You rinse your coffee cup and make your way towards the door. “Did you want to come down with me?” 
Karly stops and gives you a look. “I thought that was already implied.” 
“Well, thanks, that’s really nice—!” 
“Someone has to give you an embarrassing goodbye.” 
“There it is.” You sigh. You don’t say anything as you and Karly exit the apartment and make your way down the hall into the elevator. It only takes a few seconds for the elevator to lower down to the ground floor, where you and Karly exit and make your way to the front of the apartment complex. 
You swear your heart beats just a little faster as soon as you see Jungkook near the front entrance of the building. He’s wearing a pair of black jackets with an oversized denim jacket and currently looking down at his phone—overall appearing so tall and pretty and otherworldly. For a brief second, you are taken by the fact that for the next four days, he’ll be yours. 
Jungkook looks up as soon as he hears the door opening and he smiles. “Hey you.” 
You smile, albeit a little lopsided and dreamy. “Hi.” 
Jungkook walks towards you immediately. “Here, let me help you with that.” He reaches a hand out and gently takes the handle of your suitcase before you can say anything. Just as he’s taking the suitcase from you, Karly emerges from the building. “Oh, sorry about that.” 
Karly waves him off. “Don’t be. I’m Y/N’s roommate—I’m just here to see her off.” 
Jungkook stares at her for a moment, then he snaps his fingers. “Wait, I remember you. You went to college with us too.” He jerks his chin towards you. “You hung out with Y/N a lot, right?” 
“Yeah, I’m Karly.” She holds out her hand for Jungkook to shake. “And you’re right, she and I hung out a lot. We were roommates back then too.” 
Jungkook nods in understanding, before shoving his hand into his pocket. His other hand is still holding onto your suitcase. “Well, I promise to take good care of Y/N.” 
Karly smacks her teeth against the side of her mouth as she points at him. “You’re a good man, Jungkook.” She pauses for a moment, seeming to contemplate a new thought. You recognize the look immediately, and your fingers twitch as if you want to strangle her. Or at least let her know you’re throwing her a look of murderous intent. But of course, Karly doesn’t see it. And even if she had, you doubt she’d care. “But no funny business, alright.” 
You gape at her. “Karly!” 
Jungkook coughs at that. “I-It’s just a drive—y-you don’t need to worry about that.” He does, however, turn away to hide the red that dusts his cheeks. 
As soon as Jungkook’s back is facing you, you whirl around to shoot Karly with a glare. “Karly, you’re lucky I’m leaving for the next four days or I would not hesitate to figure out how to make stuffocation look like an accident!” You hiss out between teeth without taking a breath. 
Karly glares right back. “You’re really dumb, aren’t you? The fact that he recognizes me because he saw you hanging out with me on campus doesn’t strike any chords? Even though, like you said, you guys weren’t really friends?” 
You blink. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 
Karly widens her eyes. “What the fuck do you mean? Are you dumb with all the boys or just Jungkook?” 
“What do you mean!” You snap back. 
“So, Y/N, ready to go?” 
You whirl back around to find Jungkook now standing in front of you and Karly. He must have finished packing your suitcase in the trunk of his car and is now looking over at you with a tilt in his head. 
So you force a smile. “Of course,” You say, turning to Karly. “I was just saying bye to my roommate.” 
He nods in understanding, sparing one more glance at Karly before seeming to decide against it because he looks away. He’s still a little red at Karly’s previous comment. “We should get going then.” 
“Sure.” You look over at your roommate. “See you, bitch.” 
Karly waves back, grinning wildly. You just know she has several other thoughts she’d like to share with you, but has probably deemed you embarrassed enough. Lucky for you, she keeps her mouth shut. 
Unlucky for you, without Karly to be a barrier of distraction, this leaves you alone with Jungkook. You slide into the passenger seat of his car, still not yet processing the weight of what you’ve just agreed to. You fiddle alone for a second before Jungkook is opening the driver’s side and shifting into his seat. 
There is a silence as Jungkook is starting the car, and a part of you wants to die. Or at least have the ground swallow you whole. Holy fuck, what did you just sign up for? 
Your mind somehow takes five seconds to turn into complete shambles that you almost miss Jungkook’s question. 
“Here, I’m giving you an important mission,” Jungkook says, rummaging through the various chords that lay over the center console before producing an aux cord. “Should you choose to accept.” 
He’s got on such a serious expression you momentarily forget about your anxiety. His usage of the iconic line from Mission Impossible makes you laugh—a breathy sort of noise that escapes when your mind is too full. You still take the aux cord. “Oh my god—ever heard of bluetooth?” 
He pouts. “It hasn’t even been five minutes and you’re already insulting my beautiful Celia!” 
You raise both your eyebrows. “Celia?” 
“Yeah, that’s the name of my car.” He catches the bewildered look you give him before angling himself back to face the steering wheel, where he shifts his console into drive and makes a turn onto the main street. “If you’re already weirded out by the fact I have a name for my baby, then you’re in for a very long four days, Miss. Y/N.” 
You giggle, feeling that distraction of nerves start to come off your shoulders. “Not weird at all.” You pause. “Ryan is the name of my car.” 
“Ah!” He holds one arm out in a grand gesture. “You see, not so strange after all.” He steals a glance at you, watching as you’re about to connect your phone to the aux cord. “Wait!” He says, pointing a finger at you. 
You look up at him, wide eyes. 
He’s still holding an arm up. “How’s your music taste?” 
You’re still giving him your surprised expression. “You scared me!” 
He laughs, returning his hand back to the steering wheel. “Sorry, sorry. I have to ask though—I’d rather know now than later, so I can kick you out and not feel as bad about it.” 
Your laughter seems to melt away the last of your nervous energy. “Nice to know you’re putting all your cards out now.” You look down at your phone. “Regarding my music taste… it’s whatever you want dude! I have some lo-fi on here, some pop, alternative, Broadway, anime openings… an ‘everything’ playlist. Honestly, the world is your oyster.” 
“How about we start with your ‘everything’ playlist,” Jungkook suggests. “That way I can judge you immediately.” 
“Were you always this charming, Jeon Jungkook?” You retort. “Or has graduation changed you?” 
“Oh, I’ve always been this charming—you just never noticed.” 
That comment, however, goes over your head as you focus down on your playlist. You look over, selecting the shuffle option as Taylor Swift’s soft music from her newest album fills the air. Another silence fills the car, but it’s much more peaceful and comfortable. You allow yourself to settle further into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 
“So,” You start after a moment. Jungkook hums to let you know he’s paying attention. “What inspired the name Celia?” 
Jungkook brightens at the question. “She was this character from a book I read when I was younger. The Night Circus? Anyways, the book is about these two illusionists who try to one up each other with their skills of magic, but they end up falling in love. Celia is the name of one of those illusionists.” 
You grin. “Sounds like a very cute crush.” 
Jungkook grins back. 
The drive out of the city continues like this. The pair of you cover the topic of books, of music, of your favorite animes. Jungkook just has this magical power of ensuring the tension dissipates from your mind and stays gone—whether it’s through his relaxed nature or easy-going teasing or his ability to ease the conversation from one topic to the next. It feels like every conversation you and Jungkook had in college, whether vague or circling around classes, all have led up to this moment. It seems like everytime you or Jungkook run out of things to talk about pertaining to a certain topic, you would bring up memories from college and just continue from there. Everything feels natural. 
It continues to feel natural even as you and Jungkook slowly start to see the edges of the city landscape fade away. The high rises fade into shorter buildings and smaller business areas that surround the bustling city scene. You watch as those buildings and business areas become rows of houses. Residential areas in the suburbs, passing by the occasional school or corner restaurants. 
“Before we enter the wide unknown,” Jungkook starts up, breaking the quiet that has enveloped the car. “You want to pick up lunch? You hungry?” 
You haven’t even realized how much time has gone by until you look at the clock on Jungkook’s dashboard and notice that it’s past noon. You widen your eyes at the sight. “Wow, I didn’t even realize so much time had passed.” 
“Yeah, we drove through a few cities. Time flies when you’re having fun, huh?” 
“You wish,” You tease, sticking your tongue out. “So, what, do we stop at a Cheesecake factory or something?” 
Jungkook blinks. “I thought you were poor—why would we stop at the Cheesecake factory? And why is that the first restaurant that comes to your mind?” 
You wave your hands. “It was just a suggestion!” 
“Well, I’m realizing that I should probably let you know that the motel I picked for us to drive to tonight is pretty far out—Google Maps says we probably won’t get there until midnight, and that’s with us driving straight through.” 
“Midnight? Fuck, Jungkook. Will we make it to the wedding a day early or something?” 
“Ha, ha, no. I’ll go over the schedule I planned out tomorrow. Basically, I want to try and cover most of our ground on the first day so we can take the rest of the trip easy. But I thought I’d let you know now that sitting in a restaurant probably won’t be the most time responsible idea.” 
“That’s true.” You look out the window again and see the golden arches of McDonalds appear within your line of sight. “Let’s just stop at McDonalds.” 
Jungkook follows your gaze. “Alright, down. Let’s do it.” 
He exits off the freeway, following down a route that takes him almost immediately towards the McDonalds parking lot. Since this restaurant is still within the lines of the city, it’s not completely deserted. There are a few cars in the parking lot, even fewer cars in the drive-through line. Because of this, ordering the food only takes a few minutes. Both of you get chicken nuggets, sodas, and large orders of french fries. 
“You know, we’re really living like kings,” You comment as Jungkook drives out and makes his way back onto the freeway. “College graduates, both somehow able to secure a job, and still ordering chicken mcnuggets.” 
Jungkook shrugs. “I wasn’t told this is what adulthood would be like. But I’m not complaining. My 10-year-old self is singing in so much joy right now.” He says this as he’s stuffing a handful of fries into your mouth. You laugh, and hand him a napkin. 
You turn the music back on. The pair of you silently munch on your chicken nuggets, as you angle your head towards the side window once again. As Jungkook drives, the numbers of structural spaces become more scattered the longer you both continue down the freeway. 
The anime opening to Haikyuu starts playing when you turn back to Jungkook and realize that he’s trying to close the box of his chicken nuggets. You move right away, taking the cardboard from him and closing it yourself. “Let me know if you need anything, Jungkook. Think of me as your co-pilot.” 
He laughs gently. “Is that the rule of the passenger seat?” 
You shrug, putting the empty box into the McDonalds bag near your feet. “For me at least. Everytime I do one of these drives with family, the person in the passenger seat has to open the snacks, make conversation, and always stay awake with the driver. It’s just courtesy.”
Jungkook is smiling softly now, mostly to himself, but it lights the corners of his eyes that makes you momentarily unable to look away. “You wanna tell me about your family?” 
So you do. Your voice becomes softer as you continue, but Jungkook listens to every single word you say. 
True to his observation, it’s not long before the pair of you are surrounded by the wide unknown. Houses in the suburbs become farmhouses and farms. Conversations fade from your family to another comfortable silence as you continue gazing out the window. Jungkook requests your lo-fi playlist at some point, filling the car with the soft and distorted hums. It allows your mind to wander as you stare out the window. The empty stretches of land around you are filled with greenery, with mountains, cutting right through the perfect blue of the sky above you. 
By 4:00PM, your entire body is starting to feel the ache of having been seated for long hours on end. You feel the tightness in the muscles of your thigh, the bones in your knees. 
Jungkook must be feeling the same, because as soon as a sign for a rest stop comes on, he exits the freeway and pulls into a large parking lot. There’s a restroom on the side, but the area is surrounded by trees with mountains standing in the background. 
Jungkook stops the car. “We should get out for a bit to move our legs.” 
You’re already tugging on the latch that’ll open the car door. “I’m already feeling it in my knees.” You open the door and immediately extend your legs out onto the solid ground beneath you. You let out a sigh of satisfaction, and Jungkook laughs from next to you. 
He’s opening his own car door soon after, but he straightens up into a standing position pretty quickly and stretches upwards. He closes the car door behind him, watching as you eventually pull yourself together to do the same. 
You turn to face Jungkook. “I’m gonna use the restroom.” You gesture towards the building and earn a nod from Jungkook, who mentions something about doing the same thing. You meet back at the car a few minutes later. 
Jungkook gestures to the trees surrounding the parking lot. “Want to take a walk around the area? Keep the blood flowing to our legs.” 
You nod. “That sounds like a good idea.” 
“Why don’t you get started. I’ll catch up.” Jungkook watches you leave, before opening the trunk of his car and rummaging around. 
He does catch up with you, quickly enough that you hardly notice that he had sent you out first. You hear his footsteps, and the call of your name. You turn around. “Jungkook!” 
The sight before you makes you waver slightly, as bouts of shyness overtake you. Standing before you is Jungkook, with his camera in hand. The lens is pointed right at you. As soon as you’re staring straight into the camera, Jungkook grins. “Say hi!” 
You whine, whirling back around and covering your face. “Are you filming me right now?” 
“I’m a photographer at heart, what did you expect?” Jungkook teases back. “Besides, it’s really pretty around here. You think I won’t film it?” 
You snort, starting your walk around the parking lot. “Oh yeah, because there aren’t any parking lots and trees and bathroom stops at home.” 
Jungkook is quiet for a second. “That’s not what I meant.” 
You turn to stare right into the lens of his camera. “Then the mountains, right?” 
He’s quiet for another second. “Sure.” He does, however, sound a little disappointed. You do not notice this. 
The pair of you stay quiet as you make your round around the parking lot, taking in the mountains from different angles. The walk around is mostly just to rid of the sensation of your legs falling off, but it’s still a nice view to admire. As soon as you finish a complete round, you and Jungkook return back to the car. You watch as he carefully places his camera into his camera bag before you’re both back in your seats. 
Jungkook turns to you. “Ready to get going again?” He looks at the control panel behind his steering wheel. “We’ll probably have to stop for gas in a few hours. But after that, it’s straight to the hotel.” 
You settle back into the passenger seat. “I guess we already have our dinner plans then.” You’re referring to the gas station. 
Jungkook grins. “I’m down for that.” 
And so, the trip continues back on the freeway. With the lo-fi playing in the background, you watch as the sun tears through the blue sky, as the sun finally begins it’s dip to the other side. The singular color once spread across the pane of atmosphere now conjugates around the sun crawling behind the mountain—creating a diffusion of new colors. The corner of the mountain emits an explosion of oranges, pinks, and purples. 
You lift your head from the window, eyes taking in the rainbow of pastels around the now fading sun. “Wow, Jungkook, look at that sunset.” 
He snorts. “You wanna talk about things that you can’t see back in the city?” 
You pout. “But it looks so pretty, see!” You keep gesturing towards the sunset. 
Jungkook relents just enough to spare a glance in the direction. He hums. “Yeah, it’s pretty.” He looks back at the road. “Can’t really find a view like that in the city.” 
You spend a little more time admiring the sunset than Jungkook does, for obvious reasons. You’ve seen a sunset plenty of times before in the past, but the context of this whole situation makes you unable to look away from it. You’re really out here, stuck in a car with someone you have never hung out with for longer than a few minutes. But you are enjoying yourself. There's peace in that. 
So you watch until the sun dips below the mountain, momentarily leaving the sky in a navy color. 
The next time Jungkook speaks, the area around you is much darker, and the sky is nearly black. “You hungry now?” 
You lift your head from the seat, not even realizing you were drifting off. You’re thinking about Irene, wondering if you should have texted her directly congratulating her on the wedding rather than just simply sending in the RSVP. “Sure. We eat as the car eats, right?” 
Jungkook smiles, a gesture you can barely make out from the headlines. “Of course.” 
This goes on for a few more miles until the sign for a gas station comes up. A few other cars linger near the dispensers. Jungkook parks near his choice and gets out of the car. You follow behind him. He’s already sliding his credit card into the machine, and the sight makes you reach over to grab his wrist. 
“I should pay, you’ve been driving all day!” 
He shakes his head, waving you off. “We’ll take turns, okay?” He looks at you. “Buy me dinner tonight too, that sound fair?” 
You pout, leaning back as you cross your arms. “Not really, but I guess I’ll have to accept it.” 
He grins. “You are correct.” 
As soon as the gas pump alerts you of the filled tank, Jungkook returns the pump back to the machine and locks his car. Together, the two of you make your way towards the convenience store, where the bell above rings to alert the workers of your presence. Nods are exchanged as you and Jungkook tear through the aisles to find anything that could satisfy your cravings. You return back with family size bags of hot cheetos and beef jerky, while Jungkook holds his selection of roasted seaweed and Doritos. You select your drinks together before returning to the cashier. 
It’s nearing 9:00PM as you and Jungkook return back to his car, where you slide back into your seats and immediately tear into your bags of salt and sodium. 
“How are you doing?” You ask as Jungkook finishes his first bag of roasted seaweed. 
Jungkook pulls out his phone, scrolling through the final stretch needed to reach the hotel. “Yeah, about four more hours to the motel.” He looks over at you. “I’m good. The salt in this seaweed really helps. How are you doing?” 
You nod immediately. “Great. Perfect.” 
He smiles, shifting his console to drive and pulling out of the gas station. “I’m used to these weird hours. Remember how I told you I traveled around a bit with Mingyu and Wonwoo? There was this one day we only slept for an hour or something? It sucked, I think I almost passed out that day. But yeah, this is honestly not even that bad.” He turns to look at you. “I think the good company helps, too.” 
You roll your eyes, grinning. “You flatter me, Jeon.” 
Slowly, 8PM turns into 10PM. One glance at Google maps tells you that you’re still two hours from the hotel. Even though you’re not the one driving, and although you haven’t endured any physical activity that could result in this exhaustion, you still find yourself growing tired. Something about sitting under the sun, sitting in a vehicle that rocks side to side with a consistent hum—it makes your mind work slowly and therefore brings out the sleepiness quicker. 
You settle deeper into your seat. 
Jungkook giggles from next to you. “You tired already?” 
You pout slowly, eyes closed just enough. “I’m not a morning person and you made me wake up at 8!” 
“Sure, sure, of course.” 
There’s a pause. 
You ponder a question for a moment. It’s something that you would never dare ask Jungkook if you had been more awake and more alert. But you’re tired, and your defenses are lowered, and it means you are more prone to asking questions. “Hey, Jungkook? Did you have any girlfriends when we were in college?” 
Jungkook doesn’t answer immediately. “Where’s this coming from?” He asks instead. 
You shrug, making a dismissive noise as your shoulders rise up. “Curiosity.” 
A pause. “I went on a few dates, but I never had a serious relationship.” 
“No way.” You lift your head up from the seat. “But I remember seeing you hang out with the occasional girl in the quad, or at some restaurants around the school.” 
Jungkook smiles. It’s hard to read the look in his eyes. They’re focused on the road in front of him, but they seem almost hazy and faraway. “Like I said, I went on a few dates. I did really want to get into a long term relationship in college. A lot of my friends had them, that’s where my parents met, so I was really open to the idea of at least experimenting. There were a lot of girls that I thought were nice, easy-going, or just really pretty, so I tried my hand in the whole dating thing.” 
“And it didn’t work out?” You coax out gently. 
“Not really,” He continues. He steals a glance at you. “We’d go on a few dates, but none of them ever felt substantial. I think girls see me and have a certain expectation—an expectation I couldn’t meet. So I never could picture myself in a long term relationship with any of them.” 
You tilt your head towards him. “There must have been someone…” 
“Well… there was one girl.” Jungkook starts after a moment. He’s not looking at you this time. “We had a few classes together earlier—we weren’t in the same major program. I don’t even know if I’d say we were close or anything. We just had a few classes and saw each other around on occasion. But the conversations we did have during class or outside of class just felt more real. Honestly, I could have been totally wrong about her. I could have just been blinded by all these expectations I was putting on her, which is ironic. But she was the only person I could actually see myself being in a long term relationship with. Or at least try.” 
You hum, still facing towards him in your seat. “Why didn’t you try anything then? You’re a good guy, Jungkook. I’m sure she would have wanted to try with you too.” 
“I guess I was just afraid of pushing it and scaring her off. I thought it was better to stay friends with her than try to pursue something. She never gave me an indication that she felt the same.” 
“And how do you feel now?” 
There’s a pause this time. “I don’t know honestly. We remained friends up until graduation but, uh, never saw her again. I do wonder from time to time how she’s doing.” 
“You should reach out to her,” You advise softly. “Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird.” You grin at him. “You need to make your move.” 
It is then that Jungkook turns to look at you. He looks for a little longer this time, eyes focused entirely on you. Underneath the small crescent of the moon above, you are still able to make out his facial features. His cheeks, his nose, his eyes—the latter is glimmering, like he knows something that you don’t. 
“I’m working on that,” He mumbles softly. You turn your head back towards the road. 
You wake up the next morning feeling groggy, dirty, and messy. Your head lifts up from a pillow you can only vaguely remember falling on, laying on top of a bed you only vaguely remember throwing yourself in. There’s sunlight pouring into the room, but it feels like early morning sun. There’s a crisp in the air that you can feel, that you see out of the window. Right outside is the gathering of bushes and trees, a bright blue sky.
You are in the motel. 
Slowly, you push yourself into a sitting position, until you’re resting atop the white linen of your bed. Across the room, snuggled in his own twin bed, is Jungkook. His lashes are fanning across his cheekbones, his lips are parted, and his breathing is slow and soft.
It isn’t until Jungkook shifts in bed that you realize you’ve been watching him like a creep. Hastily, you tear your gaze away and decide to focus your gaze down. You notice immediately that you are not underneath the blankets. Instead, you are lying underneath Jungkook’s jacket. 
You roll the jacket off your frame, discovering that you are still in last night’s clothes—which explains why you were feeling so groggy and discombobulated. You look across the floor of the hotel room. Your suitcase is near the foot of your bed, and your phone sits on your nightstand connected to your charger. 
Vaguely, you recall what had happened the previous night—how Jungkook drove into the hotel room nearing midnight and the exhaustion was so overpowering that you and Jungkook blindly asked for any room with two twin beds before following through and practically collapsing into your respected beds. 
You definitely did that, which explains why you were on top of the bed, why you’re still in yesterday’s clothes, and why Jungkook’s jacket was your blanket. Stealing another glance at Jungkook: underneath the blankets and in a different t-shirt—you can assume that he was able to take a shower before lying down. 
With a sigh, you push off Jungkook’s jacket and lay it down on the bed next to you. Hoping not to disturb Jungkook, you slide out of bed and lower your suitcase to the ground. After fishing out a new set of clothes, you decide to take a shower. 
The warmth from the shower is the best breath of fresh air you’ve gotten since hitting the road with Jungkook. It feels like your body is going through a battery recharge, and it’s one you take your time with. You step out of the shower, running the towel through your hair and drying yourself enough to slip on your outfit for the day. The towel is thrown around your neck as you step out of the shower, letting the steam follow you out of the bathroom. 
Jungkook is still sleeping as you step out, which is good otherwise you’d feel bad for having disturbed his sleep time. After all the driving he did yesterday, you figure he deserves a few extra hours regardless of what the schedule calls for. 
You continue running the towel through your hair as you pick up your phone. Strangely, you do not remember connecting it to a charger before knocking out, but you pick it up regardless to see the 9:00AM time across your screen. 
There’s a quiet that takes over, in which you’re sitting perched comfortably on your bed and scrolling through your phone as Jungkook continues to drift a few feet away from you. 
About thirty minutes seem to pass before Jungkook is moaning softly to himself, letting out a puff of air as he slowly opens his eyes. His arms extend above him, knocking into the headboard and making him curse softly to himself. His eyes open as he lowers his hands to inspect the damage before immediately looking over towards you. 
He blinks, a tired smile overtaking his lips as he arches his back into a stretch. “Hey,” He greets, voice rough and scratchy and making your heart clench. Damn thing. “You’re awake. You knocked out pretty quickly as soon as we got the room.” 
You laugh. “Yeah, I honestly figured that.” You pick up his jacket, as if he hadn’t been the one to lay it on you those hours ago. “Thanks for trying to help me get comfortable.” You gesture towards the nightstand. “Did you find my charger too?” 
Jungkook sits up as he continues a small round of stretches and yawns. “I did,” He says. “You were barely coherent, but made enough sense to tell me where it was in your bag. Sorry for going through it, by the way.” 
You shake your head, waving him off. “No worries. Thank you again, Jungkook.” 
The pair of you stare at each other for a few moments, before that silence is broken by Jungkook’s phone going off. You look down as Jungkook snatches his own phone off the nightstand. He scrolls through something, before placing it back. 
“So, what’s the plan for today?” You ask, bringing your fingers through your hair to comb and give you a distraction. 
“Oh! Right.” Jungkook swings his legs off the side of the bed. “We have a slower day today. The hotel I picked is only about five hours away? We’re driving through the mountains today, so there’s this place I want to visit that has a little restaurant and everything. It’ll be a cute pit stop.” 
You nod. “Awesome, okay.” You curl your fingers around the strands of now loose strands of hair. 
It takes another hour until you and Jungkook are packed up again and ready to leave. A quick stop to the lobby provides both of you with a bagel and cup of coffee each as your breakfast. All before you’re once again sliding into the passenger seat of Jungkook’s car. 
You roll your shoulders before clicking your seatbelt in. “Ready for another long day?” 
“Of course.” He digs through his center console, producing his aux cord. “Your mission,” He says dramatically, not unlike yesterday. “Should you choose to accept.” 
You laugh gently, taking the cord. “You in love with Mission Impossible or something? This is the second time in two days you’re quoting it to me.” 
And this is how your day starts off—talks of Mission Impossible films that bleed into conversations about movies. 
The day at 10 o’clock in the morning is bright and blue as Jungkook drives back onto the freeway and continues down the road. The first few hours consist of the surrounding flatland, of green grass and high mountains all around. Conversations between you and Jungkook are a little more scattered today, but there’s a new level of comfort about the situation. With both of you well rested, it invites a more relaxed atmosphere as you pass the occasional joke or story time between the pair of you. 
As the sun continues to travel higher in the sky, Jungkook’s car starts it’s approach up the mountain. The trees start enveloping the pair of you into a newer, higher world. Not only that, but whenever you and Jungkook reach a clearing, it exposes a dip of lakes, grass, and mountains. And you, always having enjoyed the views of nature, keep an open eye for every single thing. 
You see Jungkook’s choice of destination before he does, and you gasp excitedly. 
Up ahead is a cloud of pink, white, and red flowers covering an entire mountain side. There is an occasional pop of cedar trees amongst the covering of pink, white, and red, but the colors are so poignant that it captures your attention immediately. 
You point to it. “Is that where we’re going?” 
Jungkook grins. “Surprise!” He’s selected this spot before offering the invitation to let you come along, but you’re not complaining. You’ve never been to a flower farm before, despite having heard about them and seen pictures of them for most of your childhood. You continue to watch with wide eyes and bright smiles as Jungkook drives closer and closer to the destination, finally parking in the appropriate lot after paying the fee. 
You’re practically vibrating in your seat with excitement. “Jungkook, Jungkook, c’mon let’s go, let’s go!” You push on the latch and nearly tumble out onto the ground. You straighten to stand on your feet, before meeting Jungkook near the trunk of his car. Surprise, surprise, he pulls out his camera and loops the strap over his head. 
He’s grinning as he closes the trunk. “You’re a little excited, aren’t you?” 
“A little?” You echo, clapping your hands, seemingly unable to wipe the grin off your face. “Jungkook, this is a flower farm! It’s so exciting!” 
So you dart off with Jungkook following closely behind you. The parking lot is located at the top of the flower farm, so the tour around the fields is a downwards one towards the bottom. A small pathway maps out a route for you to follow as you take in the various lines of flowers and colors. One short glimpse at the brochure tells you that these are spring flowers, and that you and Jungkook are visiting during the perfect season. You and Jungkook continue through your makeshift tour in silence, taking in the flowers as well as the view that extends out far beyond your line of sight while Jungkook snaps photographs behind you. Words don’t need to be said when everything around you says it all. 
At the bottom of the field is a cafe, a small brick building with an outdoor seating area facing the now upward flower display. You and Jungkook order sandwiches and soda, and take your seats outside as you wait for your number to be called. There are a fair amount of people today at the field, most of which you can see ahead roaming through the flowers ahead. 
“Have you ever been to a flower farm before?” Jungkook asks, as he glances over at you to see how bright your expression is. 
You smile as you turn to him. “No, never. But thank you for bringing me here, it’s beautiful here.” 
Jungkook smiles, looking a little smug. He looks proud of himself. “I’ve always wanted to come here, so I’m glad I was able to bring you along.” It looks like he wants to say more, but the number that rests between Jungkook’s fingers is called out, interrupting the conversation. He returns a moment later with the food. “I actually wanted to ask you something,” He says, taking the sandwich plate off the tray and placing it in front of you. 
You take the napkins that are being offered to you. “What’s up?” 
He settles down into his seat. “I didn’t get to return the question that you asked me last night.” 
It takes you a second to realize what he’s referring to. Immediately, you feel yourself turn red as you press your lips together. You were definitely drowsy last night, and hadn’t put too much consideration in the aftermath of asking Jungkook about his college relationships. You instead try for a laugh, as you wave him off. “Well, you don’t need to ask me. It’s pretty boring.” 
“Nonsense,” Jungkook brushes off, taking another bite of his sandwich. “So tell me, did you get into any relationships in college?” 
You laugh, albeit a little nervously. “No, not really. I never even went on any dates before—I guess, like you, I just couldn’t see myself in any long term relationship with anyone that seemed to like me.” 
“Well, how about crushes on your end? Did you like anyone?” 
You gaze over at Jungkook—taking in his wide curious eyes, his soft voice, his contagious laugh. The memories of him waving at you in class, of him catching up to you afterwards to continue previous conversations, of him going out of his way to say hi to you in the library. Jungkook has always been thoughtful, considerate, and soft along the edges. How could you not have crushed on him during college? 
And how could you not continue to have these lingering feelings for him afterwards? 
You think about your own advice you had given to Jungkook. You should reach out to her. Since you guys were friends before, I’m sure asking her out just to catch up won’t seem so weird. You need to make your move. Could you even follow your own advice? 
You look down before Jungkook could start asking questions about your staring. “There was this one guy,” You start, trying for an uneasy laugh. “But I don’t think he ever noticed me. Well, that’s a lie. I guess we were kind of friends? I think it’s more along the lines of me being out of his league.” 
“That’s depressing,” Jungkook notes as he finishes his sandwich. You hardly even noticed him inhaling the thing. “How could you be out of a guy’s league? You’re so smart and funny and easy to talk to—if anything, a guy would probably be out of your league.” He leans forward, bringing you close enough where you can clearly make out the mole underneath his lip. “Tell me about this punk. So I can tell you he’s not good enough for you.” 
You laugh, keeping your gaze on him. You doubt he’d be so confident had he known about ‘this punk’. “He isn’t a punk,” You remark quietly. “He’s really nice, and really sweet. I was pretty quiet in college. Definitely introverted and kept to myself and had a hard time making friends. Although I would have honestly barely considered him a friend, he just made me feel like my time was meaningful and my attention was valuable to him.” Jungkook’s eyes continue to bore into yours. “If anything, I just wish he knew how much I admire him.” 
Jungkook’s gaze is unwavering across your face, once again displaying that unreadable expression. Yet, despite that, something glimmers in his eyes and he seems to come to an understanding you yourself don’t know about. That glimmer keeps swimming across the orbs, even as he switches his gaze between your eyes. They flicker down to your lips for a second, and your heart stutters in your chest. 
Jungkook coughs, pulling away from you as he seems to hyper-focus his attention on the soda still in front of him. He looks shy as he steals another glance at you from across the table. “He might not have made you feel that important if you were too scared to tell him how you felt.” 
You look down at your sandwich and take another bite. Something about the way he’s staring holes into the side of your face tells you that he knows something that you don’t. You wonder what he’s thinking. 
Jungkook wears that thoughtful expression for the rest of the visit to the flower field, as the pair of you return back to his car and slide back in your seats. He stays quiet as you resume the trip, slowly making your way back onto the freeway and towards your second motel. 
This kind of quiet is different than the previous silences the pair of you have grown to share over the past twenty-four hours. Unlike the comfortable moments of unspoken words, this is more tense. Like he knows something that you don’t. 
You don’t know what to say, or how to break that silence. You don’t know if perhaps you said something you shouldn’t have, or said something to make him uncomfortable. All of those thoughts are not pleasant ones. 
Jungkook stays quiet for most of the drive through the mountain. The music you have selected is loud enough that seems to drown the tense atmosphere, but the questions still press themselves deeply into your mind. What is he thinking about? 
And worse of all: did he know you were talking about him? 
You and Jungkook only speak a handful of times during the trip. He asks you if you need to use the restroom, if you’re hungry, and if you could play him your favorite anime openings. The pair of you have a handful of laughs about your mutual love for Haikyuu and Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, but most of the drive to the motel is ridden out in silence. 
The pair of you reach the hotel around dinnertime, definitely nowhere as exhausted as you had been the previous night, but just as eager to finally reach your destination. The tension between you and Jungkook has eased slightly, so you can only assume that perhaps he has overcome whatever was bothering him. You yourself have pushed the thought of Jungkook knowing the truth out of your mind. After all, if he had known, you assume he would have brought it up. Or at least called for an Uber to send you home. You assume you would have provided some sort of reaction for the two of you to talk about. But alas, those thoughts follow a conversation that has not happened, and will probably never happen, because you’re sure that you’ll never have to be in a situation that forces your feelings to go out of control once again—! 
“Hi,” Jungkook returns to the hotel clerk behind the desk, a girl to be about your age, who is flickering her gaze between you and Jungkook. A flicker in her eyes tells you that she already has multiple thoughts and assumptions about your relationship. “Do you have a room with two beds?” 
“Oh!” The girl blinks, momentarily looking taken aback. “Of course, let me check.” She turns her attention to the computer screen in front of her. Her eyebrows furrow together. “I’m sorry sir, we only have rooms with one bed available—either a full, queen, or king-size mattress.” 
Jungkook makes a noise in the back of his throat as he taps his credit card on the desk. Just watching from the side, you notice how he swallows, how he looks down, how his cheeks turn red. He turns to you after a moment. “D-Do you, uh, do you mind?” 
It takes you a second to realize what Jungkook is asking. He’s asking if you’d be okay with sharing a bed with him. Him: your college crush, the guy you never really lost feelings for. 
You turn red too. “U-Um…” You press your lips together and swallow. “S-Sure,” You manage, waving your hands out in front of you. “I-I don’t mind. I-If you don’t mind, of course.” 
“I-I don’t mind either.” Jungkook, however, looks like he’s about to combust. He looks a little lost again. He blinks once, twice, and seems to realize that he’s supposed to hand the woman behind the desk his card. “Uh, whichever room is the cheapest.” 
“That’ll be the room with the full-size bed.” She flickers her gaze between the two of you. “If that’s okay.” 
“O-Of course,” He stammers back, allowing the girl to take the card. He looks at you. “Do you mind staying here? I have to go to the bathroom real quick.” 
“S-Sure, go ahead.” A part of you wants to hit your head on the desk. What is happening to you? Why is the mere thought of sharing a bed with Jungkook turning you into a pile of mush? You’re a grown ass woman—! 
“So the two of you on vacation or something?” The woman behind the desk asks. She’s still in the middle of scanning Jungkook’s credit card. 
You try for a smile. “Kind of, we’re going to a friend’s wedding.” 
“I see, that sounds fun.” She smiles. “You know, I have to be honest, I was a little surprised he asked for two beds. You guys would make a cute couple.” 
At the label, you start to turn red. “O-Oh n-no, we’re not a couple at all. That’s very flattering, b-but yeah we’re not together.” 
“Oh, I know,” The girl rebuffs. Her smile looks more like a grin. She places Jungkook’s credit card on the desk, along with a receipt and a pen. “I hope the full size bed will change that.” She gives you a wink. 
You part your lips, unsure what to make of the situation. “What—!” 
“I’m back,” Jungkook says, sliding up from behind you and making you jump slightly. “What did I miss?” 
“Uh…” You wonder if your face is too red or not. It certainly feels that way. “Here!” You push him forward towards the desk. “She scanned your credit card. You just need to sign and we’ll be on our way.” 
If Jungkook notices the stiffness in your posture, he doesn’t comment as he leans forward to sign the receipt. Just over Jungkook’s shoulder is the worker, looking at you with a now shit-eating grin across her lips. Several questions ping through your mind, but you don’t get to ask any of those because Jungkook is turning around with his credit card in hand. 
“Uh, ready to get going?” 
“Sure!” You say, voice a few several pitches higher and you return to wanting the ground to swallow you whole. Jungkook leads the way out of the lobby, and you dare one last glance back towards the woman behind the counter. 
She’s waving a slip of paper in her hand. 
You turn back to Jungkook. “Hey Jungkook, give me a second. I think we forgot to grab something at the desk.” 
It sort of feels like a walk of shame to reach the worker behind the counter, who is still grinning at the sight of you and your internal struggles. She hands you the slip of paper, mouths something that makes you go red, before you’re turning back towards Jungkook. “Good luck,” She had whispered. 
Before you’re reaching Jungkook, you open the paper. At the very top is the WiFi password. 
Underneath the WiFi password, in what you can only assume is her handwriting, is one sentence. Fate said you guys only get one bed- don’t worry, I think he likes you too :-) 
“What was that about?” Jungkook asks. 
You shove the paper into your pocket. “The WiFi password,” You supply. 
The walk to the hotel room is quiet as Jungkook leads the way through the different hallways, corridors, and numbers on plaques. That tense silence is back as he guides the two of you, stopping only when he reaches the number that matches the one on the index card. He gives you a look, and inserts the card key into the slot. The door beeps, and he pushes open the door to find, true to the word of the lady behind the counter, one full-sized bed in the middle of the room. 
For the first few hours, it’s easy to ignore that full-sized elephant in the room. Jungkook takes out his laptop and you guys watch your favorite season of Haikyuu together—it’s season two—or you guys linger about on your phones. It isn’t until nighttime falls into your bones, into your minds, that you realize that you really need to address the new situation. 
“I’m gonna take a shower first, if that’s okay,” You say, already sliding off the bed to gather your belongings from your suitcase. Jungkook is humming along to the Haikyuu ending song, but he stops long enough to accept you taking the first shower. He watches you as you fish pajamas out from your suitcase. “Hey, Jungkook…” You start. “Are you sure you’re cool with this?” You gesture to the bed. “I can sleep on the floor. They give you extra bedding for a reason…” 
“What? No, of course not, I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.” He moves until his knees are pressed into the mattress. “And I’m cool with this. Promise.” He hesitates. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” 
“Y-Yeah,” You manage, straightening into a standing position with your clothes in hand. “I don’t really move around when I’m sleeping. And I trust you, Jungkook.” You keep your gaze on each other until you break it first, turning around to step into the bathroom. 
You step out many minutes later, hair freshly washed and feeling much more relaxed than before. Jungkook has moved to the desk in the corner of the hotel room, typing away at some emails on his laptops. He does, however, whirl around upon hearing you exit the bathroom. The sight of you in your sweats, t-shirt, and damp hair makes his eyes linger. 
You merely tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “You can go now,” You say quietly. 
Jungkook nods. “Thanks.” 
Breaking that eye contact again, you turn to the bed and lift the blankets to slide under the covers. You rest your head on the pillow, and immediately start to drift away. 
You are brought back after what only feels like a few minutes, when you hear a light switch turn off followed by the blanket next to you lifting up. You turn slightly towards the other side of the bed. “Jungkook?” You whisper. 
A stillness. “Ah shit, I’m sorry. I was trying to be sneaky.” 
“Mmm…” You mumble softly, turning your body 180 degrees in order to face him. You can vaguely make out the shadow of Jungkook’s outline. “Don’t worry. I’m a really light sleeper. Come on in.” 
There is a shift in the blankets until you feel the additional weight of Jungkook’s figure crawling in next to you. The knowledge that Jungkook is lying right next to you turns your blood hot both with anxiety and because Jungkook brings in a new wave of heat underneath the covers. For a cool spring night, it’s comforting. But also further anxiety-inducing. 
Jungkook shifts and even though the pair of you are on opposite sides of the bed, you can still feel the warmth radiating off his body. In the silence of the hotel room, you can hear Jungkook breathing. 
“Is this okay?” It’s Jungkook asking. His voice is quiet, soothing, and very close to your face. You realize that you guys are facing each other. 
Still, you have to give an answer. “Y-Yeah,” You reply softly. “Goodnight, Jungkook.” 
“Goodnight.” 
You turn onto your back. You try to go to sleep, you really do. But your heart is pounding, and rather than the blood filling your ears, it’s the sound of Jungkook’s breathing. 
“Y/N, you still awake?” Jungkook asks softly. 
You snort. “It’s only been a minute.” 
Jungkook smiles. “Sorry. I just… I have a question. A thought, actually.” 
“What is it?” 
“Well, okay, I don’t want to come off as arrogant or self-centered, but it’s just a question and just this thought that I have…” 
“Jungkook.” You turn back to face him. “You can ask me the question. I don’t mind.” 
“Well, alright.” Jungkook shifts. He’s a little closer now, you can make out the outline of his face. Everything looks slightly more defined now, definitely a result of your eyes adjusting to the darkness. “When you were talking about the guy you had a crush on… you know, when I asked if there was someone you were interested in while we were in college.” 
“Oh, I remember.” Your heart feels fuzzy, even though you have no idea what he’s going to ask you. 
“Okay, um. I guess I just wanted to know. Were you talking about me? 
The world seems to stop tilting on its axis—and all the consequences of that follow along. Everything around you slows to a grind: your heart stops in your chest, and all the air drains out of your lungs. You hold your breath, feeling as if your body has just been dipped underwater. Thousands of thoughts ping through your mind. You feel like that episode of Spongebob where all the file cabinets in your brain are catching aflame. You suddenly feel like you have no thoughts, but too many thoughts at the same time. 
Above all, one question rises above all the rest: how did Jungkook know? 
You’re so wrapped up in your thoughts that you don’t hear your name being called. It isn’t until you feel a hand at your shoulder do you jolt. “H-Huh?” 
“S-Sorry.” Jungkook sounds a lot more nervous now. “You weren’t responding.” 
“I… I was thinking,” You reply lamely. 
A pause. “What’s your answer?” Were you talking about me?
You swallow. Should you tell the truth? Or should you deny everything with the hopes that Jungkook will forget this conversation ever existed? 
The words spill out before you can think of a proper answer. “What if I was?” 
Jungkook is quiet for a moment. “Well…” He starts up again, inching forward towards you. Every move he makes is amplified in your ear, every squeak of the mattress and every rustle of clothing echoed in the small space that is your hotel room. “I’d be kinda frustrated, to be honest. Because when I was talking about my own crush, it might have been about you.” 
At Jungkook’s confession, the world seems to come crashing down on you as everything around tries to catch up to you. Immediately, you assume that perhaps you hadn’t heard Jungkook correctly, or maybe you’re completely misinterpreting what he’s trying to say to you. 
In a perfect world, maybe you’d say something witty and smart. Maybe you’d play along until he snapped. Maybe you’d be fluent in courting talk and understand exactly what he’s trying to say to you. 
But this isn’t a perfect world, and you are neither witty nor smart. You most certainly are not aware of flirtations. You need boys to be as straightforward as possible. Which is why you utter the most comprehensible: “What?” 
You feel a warmth at your hip—Jungkook’s hand against your skin. “Ahhhh.” Jungkook starts, not at all sounding fearful but rather casual. Still the underlying case of shyness, however, because this is still Jungkook. “I forgot you sometimes need simple things spelled out for you. Remember when you emailed our Arts History professor three times because you kept forgetting what font she wanted the assignment in?” 
You flush—Arts History was the class you and Jungkook were forced to pair up together for. Maybe you would have protested it more had you known Jungkook would turn out to be a little shit over it. “That was a one time thing! You’ve been bringing it up for as long as I’ve known you!” 
Jungkook giggles, pulling you closer so your face is against his collarbone and his chin rests on your shoulder. “Shh, okay, okay, I’m sorry.” 
Your face is burning at the feeling of your bodies so close together, your fingers pressed against his shirt and your nose against his skin. He smells like floral fabric softener. “Jungkook…?” You whisper softly, breath fanning his neck. 
Jungkook tilts his head to rest gently against your temple. He stays quiet for a moment, absorbing the moment. “If you did have a crush on me in college, it would be frustrating. Because I had a crush on you too.” 
This time it’s straightforward, just like how you’ve always wanted it. Why can’t you seem to reply? 
“Oh.” 
“I know.” 
You curl your fingers around Jungkook’s shirt. “What if…” You start slowly. “What if I said I still had those feelings?” 
Jungkook seems to think about his answer. “I’d say that I do too.” 
You swallow, nodding in a way that allows him to feel the movement. “Okay then.” 
Without a warning, Jungkook moves to curl his whole arm around your frame. This brings you even closer together. He noses your hairline. “Go to sleep,” He whispers softly. “We can talk about this tomorrow.” 
A part of you wants to say no—that holding off on confessions isn’t what happens in novels or tv shows or movies. But the larger part of you knows that you won’t be able to have a proper discussion like this when you are weak, tired, and vulnerable. Your heart stalls at his consideration, allowing yourself to be content just like this: asleep, cuddling with Jeon Jungkook as you’ve imagined since you first developed your crush. 
It’s much better than the fantasy. 
.
You wake up the next morning with Jungkook’s arms wrapped around you, his soft breathing against your neck and his lips dusting the skin of your neck. There’s a new kind of comfort you find being held like this, and a part of you wants to melt back into his arms. You think you can pretend to be asleep just to stay here a little longer, but the urgency you have to pee and get the day started becomes too pressing. 
Your previous assumptions of Jungkook being a heavy sleeper are confirmed as you manage to untangle yourself from him without so much as a whine from his end. By the time you finish with the bathroom, Jungkook is just beginning to push himself into a sitting position. 
You linger near the foot of the bed. “Good morning,” You greet, almost nervously. For good reason to—the memory of last night is vague but defined well enough where you aren’t sure what the next course of action should be. It’s not like your college ever offered a course about what to do when your crush admits to liking you back. 
Jungkook looks at you from across the bed. He gives you a small smile, a reassuring one. “Morning,” He says back. “How did you sleep last night?” 
You twist your hands together. “Pretty good, actually. How about you?” 
“Me too.” He adjusts his position so he can crawl over to you. He slides his legs over the side of the bed right next to you. He brings his hands towards you, palms up. Although he’s close enough to reach you, he doesn’t. Instead, he asks: “Can I?” 
You don’t say anything, you merely rest your hand in his. He tugs you towards him, stopping only when you’re standing between his legs. He still keeps his fingers curled around yours, turning your hand up to play with your fingers. 
He looks up at you, a soft smile across his lips. “Hi.” 
You smile back. “Hi.” 
He laces your fingers together, resting them between your bodies. “I guess now for the bigger question… how are you feeling?” 
You look down at your hands, deciding you like the way his larger hands cover yours. “H-How did you know I was talking about you?” You ask instead, looking over at him. 
Jungkook shifts his gaze away for a moment. “I don’t know,” He admits earnestly. “You were just looking at me back at the flower field and I had a feeling. And I really think a part of me was hoping you were talking about me.” 
Unable to help yourself, you feel the side of your mouth quirk up into a small smile. “What would you have done if I wasn’t talking about you?” 
He exhales in a laugh. “Honestly, I might have just driven out in the middle of the night and gone over a bridge or something.” 
You laugh, trying to diffuse your smile by pressing your lips but it only works so well. “I was really surprised to hear you liked me back.” 
“Of course!” He exclaims, looking momentarily shocked that you would feel this way. “I wasn’t messing around when I said you were smart, funny, and easy to talk to. That’s what made me really like you when we first met. Whenever we talked you just felt so real and approachable—like I could just be myself around you. And even now, seeing you after graduating and realizing you’re still all of those things. It just makes me like you more.” 
You feel your heart thumping wildly in your chest. You’ve never thought of yourself in the way Jungkook is describing you—you always just assumed that you were in the background, that you’d never be enough. 
Jungkook is looking at you, his eyes big and wide and full of truth. “Is that weird?” He asks. 
You shake your head immediately. “No, no it’s not weird at all.” You shrug a shoulder, giving him a meek smile. “It’s really sweet, actually.” 
Jungkook grins at that, heaving out a breath as a sign of his lowered defenses. “I think you’re sweet too.” 
You groan at that, throwing your head back as Jungkook breaks into a series of giggles. “You’re corny.” 
“You’re not complaining,” He points out. This is true. 
You shrug. “I guess that means I’m expecting us to catch up on three years of terrible flirting.” 
The smile slides off his face. “You’re right.” He brings your joined hands closer together until your whole body is standing closer to his. “Can I ask to kiss you?” 
The four letter K word makes your heart stutter in your chest once more. Your hands are so close to his chest that you can feel his own heart beating, and the thought of Jungkook being equally nervous for this gives you enough confidence to return his question. “Why don’t you ask and find out?” 
He smiles, a bunny smile that crinkles his eyes. “Touche. Can I kiss you?” 
You smile back. “Yes…” You whisper, leaning down just enough for Jungkook to crane his neck up in order to meet each other halfway. It’s just a closed-mouth kiss, a soft weight against your lips.
It’s one that Jungkook pulls away from before you can really enjoy it, really ponder asking for more. “Sorry,” He says immediately, pointing to his mouth. “Morning breath.” 
The pair of you stare at each other for a moment, before bursting out into laughter. That tense atmosphere is gone, replaced inside with that previously casual and comfortable air—as you step away from Jungkook and let him get his morning started. Except this time, the air is filled with open lingering stares, shy smiles, and Jungkook taking your suitcase wordlessly as you exit your hotel room. 
By the time you load into your car, it’s nearing noon and the gas tank in Jungkook’s car is almost empty. The pair of you agree in another champion’s breakfast—gas station food. 
“I swear, we’re both going to have terrible breakout tomorrow during the wedding,” You point out. Despite your words, you still tear into your Nacho Cheese Doritos with the aggression of a gorilla. “I’m going to photograph horribly. Irene will be so embarrassed.” 
“You photograph horribly? Inconceivable!” He says the word just as it is said in The Princess Bride, which makes you burst into another fit of laughter. 
The afternoon pans out the same way it has for the past two days. Jungkook drives onto the freeway, you decide the music, and the conversations fade in and out. Neither of you talk about the events of the previous night or of what happened in the morning—but the way Jungkook reaches out to laces your fingers together is more than enough. 
The town Jungkook has selected to stop for the evening is a five hour drive from the wedding venue—and it’s an actual city space this time, with restaurants and grocery stores and apartments. As soon as Jungkook tells you this information, you are bursting with excitement. It’s been two days since the pair of you actually stopped and lingered in a city environment and you miss it. 
It takes another whole day of driving to reach the city destination, as the first alert you get is the increasing number of cars that have joined you on the freeway. These more busy freeways guide you into the city, where you are greeted with the first sight of buildings, sidewalks, restaurants, and parking lots in days. 
Even though most of these landmarks are simple flashes that you and Jungkook pass through on the way to the hotel he has selected, you keep your eyes glued out of the window in order to take in as much of the surrounding area as you can. You continue to watch as the immediate high rises become more sporadic and spread out, until he’s finally pulling into the hotel. The sun is just setting behind the many buildings along the horizon. Lots of other cars are parked in the parking lot. You can hear other cars, buses, and trunks driving around the background—and you feel strangely comforted by this discovery. 
“Are you okay with sharing another bed today?” Jungkook asks as he guides the pair of you into the lobby. “I may or may not have called to make a reservation earlier when you were in the bathroom.” 
You laugh, feeling giddy at the thought of Jungkook taking the initiative to continue progressing your now slow-growing relationship. “Was that all they had left?” You ask teasingly as you make your way to the counter. 
Jungkook smiles down at you. “Perhaps I didn’t ask…” 
Your lips part. “Jungkook!” 
“What?” He’s laughing now. “I think I’m gonna bow out of any excuse to cuddle with you now that you’ve given me a taste of what that’s like?” 
You’re gasping in the midst of your laughter. “You’re terrible,” You manage. 
So Jungkook checks in—true to his word, he has reserved a single full-sized bed for the room. 
“Hey, so, I was thinking,” He starts as he’s following the map provided to him by the employee with directions about getting to his appropriate room. This hotel is slightly bigger than the off-the-road ones you and Jungkook pulled into, so it takes a little longer to find the room. After a few minutes of turning the map over, you two eventually find the room. 
“What’s up?” You ask as you push open the door and roll your suitcase into the space, with Jungkook following closely behind you. 
“Come here,” Jungkook requests gently, watching as you let go of your suitcase and make your way towards him. You move into his space easily, allowing him to hold you by the waist. “Since we’ve both admitted to missing out on three years of courting, flirting, and dating—I think we should go out to an actual restaurant to have an actual date.” 
You lean back slightly and give him a slightly shocked look. “Really?” 
“Yes!” He says. “Besides, someone has to put their foot down and say that eating only McDonalds and gas station hot dogs is not the right way to go.”
You laugh at that. “True, but we were having so much fun!” 
“Nope!” He exclaims, shaking his head. “The foot is going down, we’re going to an actual restaurant for dinner. Get changed, take a shower, whatever you need to do to freshen up.” There’s a finality in his words as he finally steps away from you, the smile of sweetness still on his lips. 
The restaurant Jungkook picks after scrolling through Yelp and other lists of recommendations is a corner Italian place that apparently serves the best Linguini and clams—a dish that you really enjoy. So you put something together much more presentable than your usual round of sweatpants and baggy t-shirts—replacing the sweatpants with black jeans and giving yourself a cream colored cropped sweater. It makes Jungkook’s eyes widen all the same. He’s clad in his usual black jeans and oversized coat that is perfect for the spring breeze. 
Since the restaurant is within walking distance of the hotel, you and Jungkook agree to chill off on the driving just enough to stretch your legs and actually have a walk for once—all while celebrating the final night of the road trip. 
“I was a little worried about this at first, to be honest with you,” You admit softly to Jungkook, long after the pair of you have been seated in a corner booth and have ordered your food. You’re circling the pasta noodles around your fork, and Jungkook is watching with a touch of amusement and adoration in his eyes. 
“Not gonna lie, so was I,” Jungkook returns back with an equally meek smile. 
You gape at him. “You invited me though!” 
“I did!” Jungkook exclaims with a laugh, looking down at his own order of food. “Me inviting you was honestly a spur of the moment thing. Me catching up to you, however, was me trying to be brave.” 
“You seemed pretty brave throughout most the trip,” You point out 
Jungkook shakes his head, situating his arms in a cross motion. “Nah dude that was just all a very well thought out facade. A part of me was expecting it to go terribly so I could at least walk away knowing that I built you up in my mind and the fantasy of that was better than the reality.” He must see the look of uncertainty casting a shadow over your mind because he immediately cuts back in. “Just so you know, the reality is much better than anything I could have conjured up.” 
You lower your chin slightly, staring over at Jungkook. You bring one shoulder up into a half-hearted shrug, maybe to showcase a certain level of carelessness. “What were you conjuring up then?” 
“Oh, I don’t know if you want to go there right now,” He rebuffs, looking a little red in the cheeks. “I think we should start slow. Refer to the PG thoughts, if you will.” 
You laugh, focusing your gaze momentarily on the last of your pasta. You had sorted through the clams, since they weren’t your favorite things to eat. “Jungkook, are you admitting to me that you have thoughts above PG?” 
“Oh shit, that wasn’t my intention!” 
You giggle. “I’m messing with you, Jungkook!” 
He pouts. “Don’t do that.” He rests his hand on the table, palm up, inviting for you to take it. “I just want to spend today with you, and take it slow—I just want to hold your hand and kiss you and lay with you and just be with you in the way I couldn’t be with you in college. Is that too weird?” 
You look down, pressing your lips together, trying not to squeal and definitely not trying to throw yourself off the chair. You look back over at him and squeeze his hand. “That’s not too weird at all. That’s actually really sweet. Honestly, those are things I probably would have asked for regardless. I don’t really know the rules of dating—I never really went out that often.” 
Jungkook smiles sweetly back at you, he brings your hands up to kiss the back. “I’ll give you a few pointers then, let’s get going.” 
After the check is paid for—it ends up being a split between the two, it’s the best compromise you can come up with considering he wants to take you out but you want to pay him back for driving this far—the pair of you emerge back into the city space. Jungkook’s hand is still wrapped around yours, using that connection point to pull you close to him. 
“Now this move,” Jungkook explains, beginning to lead you both back to your hotel room. “Is when the gentleman walks the lady home, because their date went by smoothly and he wants to see her for as long as possible.” 
You laugh. “I’m enjoying this so far.” 
The pair of you continue down the sidewalk, using the time it’ll take to walk back to the hotel to walk off the food in your stomach. You resume your conversation, giggling and laughing all the same until you’re walking through the lobby of the hotel and slowly making your way to your hotel room. 
Right before you step inside, Jungkook stops you. “Normally, the front door is where the gentleman drops the lady off, and they talk about how well the date went.” 
“Oh, well, in that case, this was so nice, Jungkook,” You remark, beaming at Jungkook’s own smile. “I’m glad you convinced me to eat real food for once.” 
“You’re welcome—I had fun too.” Jungkook slides closer to you. You, completely hypnotized by his next movements, watch as he cups your face with his hand to angle you upwards. “This is the part where we have a first kiss, because the stars are lined up for this. And because I really want to.” 
You smile, curling one of your hands around the wrist near your face. “Seeing as we’ve already had our first kiss, how about a second one?” 
Jungkook smiles back, eyes lidded towards your mouth. “I guess that’ll work.” His lesson on dating, it seems, is done, as he leans in to kiss you. You suck in a breath as he covers your lips with his. It’s deeper than the first time he kissed you—which had been more of a peck with a side of morning breath. But now you’re both awake, tasting like wine, and drunk off each other. It’s a more real kiss. 
You whimper as Jungkook’s tongue runs over your bottom lip, before slipping into your mouth. It’s a sensation you can get completely lost in, until Jungkook pulls away. 
Under the hallway light, you can make out his flushed cheeks, his wet lips, his dark gaze. 
Immediately, Jungkook is pulling you to his side before he starts digging through the pockets of his jeans. “Alright, we’re going inside right now.” 
You lean into his shoulder. “I thought I was supposed to invite you inside, Jeon? What happened to giving me pointers on first dates?” 
“Screw that,” He retorts, practically shoving the hotel door open. He turns around to face you. “Now, this is our hotel room. And I want to kiss you in private.” 
Your laughter is drowned out as Jungkook tugs you by the wrist into the room. 
.
Under different circumstances, waking up next to each other after a first date would hit you with a wave of anxiety and maybe even a vague sense of embarrassment at letting someone you like see you in such a vulnerable position. 
Right now, however, under the morning sunlight within the covers of your shared hotel bed, you just feel happy and content. You wake up on your side, with an arm resting over Jungkook’s chest and his fingers curling around your own. There is an immediate feeling of giddiness that overtakes you, because it’s hard for you to believe that this is happening. Someone you’ve liked and continue to like actually returning your feelings? That has always been such a foreign concept to you. 
You don’t know how long you continue laying in bed until Jungkook starts shifting next to you, signalling his wake. You watch as his eyes slowly peel open, laced with grogginess but still looking unfairly attractive that there are butterflies in your stomach. 
Jungkook lets out a sigh, as he looks down at you. A tired smile takes over his expression. “Morning.” 
“Good morning,” You reply back, voice soft and a little shy. “Happy wedding day.” 
That is true. Today is Irene’s wedding—an event you and Jungkook will arrive at in nearly five hours. There’s a strange sort of knot that is beginning to twist itself in your stomach, a knowledge that something good is coming to a close but a fear in the unknown as to what this would mean regarding your relationship with Jungkook. Neither of you have laid down groundwork for your relationship—if this even is a relationship to begin with. You may be inexperienced with this kind of stuff, but you’re sure that one date and making out on a hotel bed doesn’t immediately constitute an exclusive relationship. 
If Jungkook notices the tension in your form, he doesn’t say anything. He kisses your temple and grumbles something about wanting to get the day started. He mentions something about not having to worry about getting dressed for the wedding straightaway—that he has reserved a room at the hotel some of the guests of the wedding would be staying at, which is where you will be getting ready before the event. You nod, hearing pieces of his words, but a lot of it gets lost in your own thoughts. 
Is it okay to ask questions about where you stand with Jungkook? Is it foolish of you to even bother wondering? You’ve seen movies and have had conversations with friends about guys who dismissed questions like that as ‘moving too fast’. You don’t want to scare Jungkook off, but you also need to know that you’re not wasting your time.
You remain in bed, staring up at the ceiling as you sigh and try to organize through your thoughts. You also try to break down how the past three days have been. 
However, trying to do so proves to be a difficult challenge, as Jungkook’s phone starts buzzing excessively on his side of the nightstand—it seems like he is getting a series of text messages from someone. 
You know you shouldn’t be looking or prying, but the constant binging of alerts only eats at your nerves more. You turn in the bed towards Jungkook’s side, picking up the device to search for the silence switch along the sides. The screen, however, lights up and you immediately see a name you have not seen or heard since college. 
Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 
Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 
Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 
You freeze, feeling your body overload with information and questions come flooding into your mind. At first, you think you reread the message wrong. You think that maybe Jennie is texting the wrong person. But after the third or fourth time, you realize that this isn’t a dream. That Jungkook already has a plus one to the wedding, and it isn’t you. 
More than that, it’s Jennie. 
Jennie is also someone you went to college with, and someone that you only heard of between the grape vines and therefore is someone that is only vaguely recognizable. But you definitely know her. Jennie had been one of Irene’s friends, president of her sorority—and labeled some of the nicest people on campus. Even just from rumors and the one time you ran into her around the school, you can see it. Jennie is nice, beautiful, friendly, and outgoing. All the things you are not. 
And now, she’s Jungkook’s plus one to the wedding. And Jungkook did not tell you. 
Your lips part as your head starts to spin. Why didn’t Jungkook tell you he already had a plus one to Irene’s wedding? Maybe he did not owe you the explanation, and maybe you should never have assumed he’d be your plus one to the wedding. 
The thought of you assuming Jungkook would be your date to the wedding fills you with a vague mortification—why did you have to go ahead and assume? 
Your mind starts to spiral as you fall into the depths of overthinking. Now you were set to attend a wedding alone, with no plus one, and surrounded by people you don’t know. All while watching Jungkook sit with Jennie, eat with Jennie, and dance with Jennie. 
Holy fuck, holy fuck, what were you going to do? You can’t go to this wedding alone. You can’t confront Jungkook about this—you’re not even supposed to be touching his phone or looking through his phone. He would definitely be upset. How could he not be? 
At once, the tears collect in your eyes. How could this be happening? Seconds ago, you had been so content and happy, excited to attend this wedding with Jungkook. Seconds ago, you had been confident about your feelings, and Jungkook’s feelings in return. From all the kisses he showered you in, the date, the talking, the confessing—how could you not feel that way? 
Had Jungkook just been pulling your leg? After all, he did have three years to talk to you, to go out with you. Why hadn’t he said something sooner? Is he here right now: talking to you and laughing with you because he hadn’t found anyone and knows that you would do anything for him? 
In the background, you can vaguely make out the shower in the bathroom turn off, signalling Jungkook’s near completion with the bathroom. At once, it feels like you’re in a car that has enforced sudden breaks and has sent you flying against the dashboard—like you can’t breathe. 
Hastily, you rest Jungkook’s phone back on the nightstand and roll back over to your side of the bed. You blink quickly, trying to rid of the tears that have collected in your eyes while also trying to calm the lump in the back of your throat. 
Just as you’re starting to get a handle back on your feelings, the bathroom door opens and you can vaguely make out Jungkook’s humming as he exits. The fact that he sounds so carefree while you’re hurting only a handful of feet away almost makes the tears come back in. But you’ve learned how to hide your emotions well. 
Jungkook’s soft laugh brings you out of your thoughts. “Still in bed?” He asks jokingly, sitting on the edge and placing a hand on your ankle. You try not to stiffen at the gesture. “You know, even though we’re getting dressed at a different hotel, we still need to get going.” 
You take in a breath. “I’m comfortable here,” You exclaim, sitting up and facing Jungkook. He’s looking as wide-eyed, easy-going, and comfortable as always. You’re not sure how long you can keep up the facade of being okay. “I was just waiting for you, that’s all.” 
You don’t wait for him to reply as you slide off the bed, grab your clothes from your suitcase, and lock yourself in the bathroom. You ignore the lump in your throat as you brush your teeth, as you get your day started. Finally, you look up at your own reflection in the mirror. Unlike previous times, when there had been a glimmer to your gaze—you don’t know you recognize the now disheartened individual before you. 
You exit the bathroom and immediately turn to pack up your suitcase once more, ignoring Jungkook in the process. The boy is on his phone, typing something—probably a text message. Maybe he’s responding to Jennie, confirming their date for tonight, as he remains completely oblivious to your feelings. 
The thought brings the tears back to your eyes. 
“Ready to go?” Jungkook asks, all smiles and soft eyes as he slides off the bed to face you. 
You don’t look at him as you shoulder your carry-on bag and straighten into a standing position. “Yeah.” You don’t mean for the tone to come out dry and unresponsive, but you’re too focused on trying to get the tears out of your throat. 
You miss the way the smile slowly slips off Jungkook’s face as he watches you move towards the door. 
Jungkook moves towards you, reaching forward to take your suitcase from you just as he’s done for the past few days. 
You, however, brush him off. “It’s okay, Jungkook.” You pull open the door and make your way down the hallway without looking back to see if he’s following closer behind you. You don’t need his help, you don’t need his pity. You don’t need him to do these things, to lead you on—especially if he was going to end up with some other girl at then end of the day. 
You stay quiet as you make your way to Jungkook’s car. Jungkook steals the occasional glance in your direction, seeming to finally realize that something is wrong. 
He, however, doesn’t say anything until you’re back on the freeway—on the five hour drive towards the wedding venue. “Everything okay?” 
You’re playing with your hair, but you stop long enough to spare him a short glance. You’re not even looking at his face, you’re looking at the chair he’s seated on. “What do you mean?” 
Jungkook clears his throat. “You’ve been really quiet since I got out of the bathroom. You…” He gestures to the center console. “You’re not even playing any music.” He tries for a smile. “I’d really like to listen to your ‘everything’ playlist.” 
“Sorry, I’m not really in a music-listening mood right now,” You whisper, realizing that you should probably cover up your ass a little better than you are currently. “S-Sorry, I think it was something at the restaurant yesterday. I’m not feeling super hot right now.” 
“Oh no, do we need to stop by a pharmacy or something? I can run in and get some stomach machine or whatever—!” 
“Jungkook, it’s fine.” 
Maybe it’s the finality of your tone, or the sharper edge in your voice, but Jungkook quiets down again. One glance in his direction shows you the furrow of his eyebrows, the set of his jawline—he looks hurt and confused. And that kills you inside. 
A small part of you wants you just lay all your cards on the table—to admit your side of the story and let him know about the texts and the hurt feeling still eating itself at your heart. 
But another part of you, the bigger part of you, doesn’t want to give Jungkook that power. You don’t want to be the one to crack first, to be the one who gets hurt first. So you refuse to say anything, settling deeper and deeper into the seat of Jungkook’s car. Contrary to your initial thoughts, he doesn’t plug in his own phone to play his own music. He simply allows the pair of you to bathe in silence. 
Without the music to distract you, without Jungkook trying to make conversation, it forces your mind to linger on the events of the early morning. Maybe Jungkook didn’t tell you because it was obvious to him that the pair of you would never have been a plus one to the wedding in general. He’s probably hurt because Jungkook can’t get his way with you. 
The realization that he doesn’t even have the consideration to warn you ahead of time that an invitation for a ride doesn’t equate to an invitation to be a plus one brings the tears back to your eyes. Did you not even deserve a warning? Why would Jungkook let you kiss him, let you fall in love with him—only to turn his back on you like this? 
You have to keep your eyes glued to the window of the passenger’s side of the car, just to make sure Jungkook won’t see the tears. You can just imagine that he’ll ask, and the conversation will steer the pair of you into an even more awkward space. 
It’s a very agonizing five hours. Not having that time to recover from the shock of those texts is becoming increasingly more difficult for you to handle. 
There are a few times that your tears overwhelm your whole system, where you have to sniff to get a handle on your body’s response to the emotions going through your body—which you’re sure Jungkook can hear. After all, there’s no music playing and there is a silence that is threatening to swallow you whole. 
Jungkook, however, does not say anything in response to your very obvious sniffle. He merely tightens his grip on the steering wheel, and keeps his mouth shut. You wonder if he’s waiting for you to talk first, to explain what’s going on with you. 
The sky is bleeding orange by the time Jungkook pulls into the new hotel, the final hotel. There is still two hours until the wedding is set to start, but every nerve in your body is screaming for you to leave and go back home. Every nerve in your body is telling you that you don’t belong here anymore. 
“Okay, I let you have your peace for the whole drive over,” Jungkook starts off, voice tight, fixing the car into park. “But I’m asking you this right now. Are you sure you’re okay? You don’t seem fine… and I’m worried about you…” He reaches across the car to land a hand on your shoulder. It’s a completely normal gesture, especially between you and Jungkook, but you cannot handle it. 
You jerk away. “I’m fine,” You snap out, actually fixing your gaze on him this time. Jungkook recoils, immediately retracting his arm from you, looking like you just burned him. You tear your gaze away from him. You’re not strong enough to see him hurt because of you. “Why do you care anyways?” 
Jungkook exhales in disbelief, turning towards the steering wheel of the car and running a hand through his hair. “What are you talking about? Is this about last night? Did I… say something to scare you off?” 
“This isn’t about what you said, this is about what you didn’t say and what you’re not telling me!” 
Jungkook looks like you just grew a second head. “What are you talking about?” 
You whirl back to face him. “Oh, so the fact that you and Miss. Jennie were already set to go to this fucking wedding together and you didn’t even think to give me a heads up and tell me?” 
Jungkook freezes like a deer in headlights. “What? How did you know about that?” 
You laugh, but it’s a hollow noise that only makes that lump come back to your throat. “Nevermind,” You bite out. This time, you don’t stop the tears from resurfacing as you give Jungkook a full look this time. His demeanor changes from frozen to pained at the sight. “I hope you guys are very happy together.” 
You don’t say another word as you fumble with the latch of the door before pushing it open with more strength than necessary. You can vaguely hear Jungkook struggling with his own seat belt, but you don’t care. You slam the car door shut and storm away. You don’t know where you’re going—maybe around the corner to scream, or to call a taxi that’ll take you to the airport. You don’t care about the wedding. You don’t think you could face the embarrassment in facing Jungkook or Jennie or Irene right now. 
“Shit, Y/N! Y/N!” Jungkook is calling for you now, his footsteps loud against the asphalt. 
Everything feels like you’re going through water, which is probably why Jungkook is able to reach you as quickly as he does. He catches you by the wrist. 
“Y/N—please, will you stop and just listen to me?” 
“No! Jungkook, let me go.” You start trying to tug your wrist, trying to pull yourself away from him. “Let me go! I’m leaving! I don’t want to see you anymore!” You’re gasping, the tears blurring your vision and making you feel powerless. 
Without a warning, Jungkook pulls you in his arms. Wrapping his arms around you, he traps you in his embrace. And you are miserable. 
“Stop it!” You gasp, trying to push him away. You’re heaving—crying and trying to escape from someone as strong as Jungkook is definitely a workout for your body. “Jungkook, leave me alone. This is all my fault.” 
He pauses. “What do you mean?” 
You stop struggling, allowing Jungkook to hold you as you pull back enough to look away from his face. You wipe at the tears on your face. “It’s my fault anyways. I said I liked you and you said you liked me too, but maybe that wasn’t enough for you. Just because we like each other doesn’t mean we’re exclusive. I should have asked up front, so I wouldn’t get hurt in the long run.” 
“You don’t need to get hurt though,” Jungkook whispers kindly, his voice overcoming the blood in your ears, as well as your own yelling. You quiet down at that, except for your own lungs contracting to catch more air. This leaves you a hiccuping mess. He waits until he knows you’re not going to say anything next. “You’re right, okay? Jennie and I were supposed to be each other’s dates.” 
You’re still trying to catch your breath. 
Jungkook rests a hand on top of your head, curling his fingers through the strands of your hair soothingly. “Are you okay?” 
You hiccup. “Why are you telling me this? I just told you that I’m hurt right now…” 
“Shhh.” Jungkook pulls back and cups your face in his hands so you can look at him. “You aren’t listening to me. I said we were supposed to be each other’s dates. We’re not anymore.” 
You blink, allowing the tears that were already filling your eyes to fall down your cheeks. Jungkook wipes them gently with his thumb. “What?” 
Jungkook’s gaze flickers between your eyes. “Jennie and I are friends, so we’d figure it would be fun to just go together and have a person to sit with, eat with, and dance with. As friends.” 
“W-What happened then?” You ask, a watery color in your voice. 
Jungkook gives you a gentle smile, the kind of gesture that tells you that you should know the answer already. “You happened, silly.” He keeps his eyes on yours. “I saw you at the party with Jimin and invited you to come with me. I assumed when I asked that we’d be each other’s plus ones. I forgot to tell Jennie though when I asked you out.” He tilts his head at you. “You saw the texts on my phone, didn’t you?”
“I-I’m sorry.” You hiccup again. “Your phone kept going off this morning and I was just trying to put it on silent. I-I didn’t mean to look through your messages…” 
“Shh, baby, you’re good, you’re okay.” Jungkook interrupts gently, wrapping his arms tighter around you and swaying the pair of you back and forth. The usage of the nickname fills you with a new feeling, a warmer feeling. It helps calm you down. 
Your breathing eventually evens out, bringing you back to reality and to the realization that you and Jungkook are hugging in the middle of a hotel parking lot. 
Jungkook loosens his grip on you, letting you step back. He watches you for a moment. “Here,” He says, digging through his pocket and pulling out his phone. “I think you should see this.” He clicks through a few of his apps, until he seems to find what he’s looking for because he hands the phone to you. You look over at him, confusion flooding through your features. Jungkook gives you a reassuring nod. “It’s okay.” 
Still hesitant, you take the phone and look at the messages across the screen. It’s the texts from this morning. 
Jennie (9:53AM): hey jungkook !! just thought I’d ask where you want to meet up before the wedding starts 
Jennie (9:53AM): since we’re each other’s plus ones, I think we should show up together but idk let me know what you think 
Jennie (9:53AM): I’m excited to see you again and catch up, it’s been so long !! :) 
Jungkook (10:20AM): hey Jennie !! oh shit i totally forgot to let u know but i actually found a plus one :( i’m soooo sorry i should have told you earlier omg i feel terrible 
Jennie (10:20AM): no worries jungkook !! who is it omg do I know them? 
Jungkook (10:20AM): it’s actually Y/N? We all went to college together… 
Jennie (10:20AM): OH!!!! wait isn’t she the one Irene was working with a lot for senior projects? 
Jennie (10:20AM): OH HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO
Jennie (10:21AM): OKAY JUNGKOOK I SEE U 
Jennie (10:21AM): she’s THE Y/N right???? the one u were in love with for our entire college career?? 
Jungkook (10:22AM): …… maybe? 
Jennie (10:22AM): WOWOWOWOW good for u Jungkook !!! glad to see u finally having the balls to ask her out !! 
Jungkook (10:22AM): OKAY THAT’S ENOUGH 
Jungkook (10:23AM): I actually felt BAD for leaving you by yourself BUT NOT ANYMORE 
Jennie (10:23AM): LMAO Jungkook I’m friends with Irene’s entire bridesmaid row i’ll be fine 
Jennie (10:23AM): just go get ur dick wet!!!!!! 
Jungkook (10:23AM): istg i will leave you on read 
Jungkook (10:23AM): also that is NOT the point!!!!!! Just wanna love my new girl :( 
Jennie (10:24AM): You’re gross 
Jennie (10:24AM): but sounds good see you tonight! 
You look up from Jungkook’s phone to see him watching you carefully, gauging your reaction, pleading for you to forgive him. 
The only thought that can be translated into a coherent sentence comes out: “You were in love with me during college?” 
Jungkook exhales in a laugh, his arms finding your waist once again. “I think ‘in love with’ was a bit of a stretch back then. I think you could agree that we didn’t know each other well enough before for me to say that.” 
You’re still looking at him. “Back then…?” You echo. 
He nods. “Back then.” He brings you closer, one hand moving up to gently brush at the skin of your cheek. “But it’s different now. Now, I can say with absolute certainty that I’m in love with you.” 
Your lips part. “You’re in love with me?” The tears spring back into your eyes, but for a different reason entirely. The emotional rollercoaster you have just been on is unbelievable. 
Jungkook’s eyes widen at the sight of your tears. “Oh shit, I’m sorry! Is that too fast? I’m sorry, I should have given you a warning or something. Or more time at least. Oh no, please don’t cry…” 
You brush him off with a watery laugh, waving his concern away. “It’s okay Jungkook. This is fine, really.” You give him a smile. “I love you too. I really thought you were pulling my leg or something.” 
Jungkook gives you his own small smile. “I’m sorry. I should have brought this up sooner about us being each other’s plus ones. Just because I assume something doesn’t mean it’s an established thing.” He brings you closer, his smile turning into a grin. “You love me too, huh?” 
You giggle. You’re too strung out to come up with something witty or clever. “Yeah…” 
Jungkook is still smiling, his gaze switching between your lips and your eyes. “I’m gonna kiss you now.” 
You nod. “About time.” 
He kisses you again, softly and sweetly, tongue slipping past the seam of your lips but it’s gentle caresses that make your heart feel like it’s crawling up your throat. 
“OH MY GOD GET A ROOM!” A voice calls from the other side of the parking lot, forcing you and Jungkook to pull away. The pair of you look at each other and you start to laugh. 
Jungkook kisses your forehead, sweeping down to your ear. “How about we check into our room and get ready?” 
You giggle, nodding over at him. “That sounds good.” 
So Jungkook leads the way, wrapping an arm around your shoulder as you gather your suitcases from the car and enter the lobby. You check in easily, as Jungkook is provided a map with directions on how to reach the room. 
The pair of you don’t pull away once until Jungkook is sliding the key card into the door and pushing it open to reveal the bedroom you’ll be sharing for the night. 
Both you and Jungkook park your suitcases near the foot of the bed, as per usual. 
“Do you want to use the bathroom?” Jungkook offers. 
You nod, smiling softly. “Okay.” 
You gather the dress you’ve brought in your arms, about to enter the bathroom, before Jungkook’s voice stops you. “Hey,” He calls, approaching you and wrapping you in his arms again. He’s much more handsey this time, like he needs to make sure you’re not going to run away again, like you’re going to be okay. “You feel better now?” His thumb brushes your lips. “Your eyes are still a little red.” 
You nod. “The makeup will probably help that,” You reassure in a soft voice. 
Jungkook mirrors your movements. “Still, how about I get some ice for you so you can put something cold underneath your eyes… to stop the puffing.” 
He looks genuinely concerned and worried for your wellbeing that you can’t help but smile. Since he is insisting, you decide to just let him be. “Okay, Jungkook.” 
He smiles. “Okay! You start getting ready and I’ll get the ice, okay?” A quick kiss on your cheek before he’s bounding out of the door with the provided ice buckets. 
Your eyes linger on the door for a few minutes before you’re turning back to your suitcase. The dress you have picked is a pink flowing floor-length number—something Karly helped you pick out before leaving. It’s soft enough that it doesn’t leave crease marks along the fabric, which had made this outfit perfect for the trip. You take the dress and your bag of makeup before entering the bathroom. You’re just slipping on the dress when you hear the hotel room door open and close. 
“Okay, I got the ice!” Jungkook announces through the bathroom door. “Did you want to work on your eyes right now?” 
“Sure,” You call back. “Do you mind zipping me up first?” 
“Of course,” Jungkook returns, sounding distracting as you open the door to the bathroom. You peek your head through, noticing Jungkook opening his suitcase on the floor and sorting through it—probably for his own suit. 
He must hear the door open, because he looks up towards you. Immediately, his eyes widen as he straightens up into a standing position. “O-Oh wow…” He’s looking you over up and down, up and down, as if he needs to commit this to memory. “Y-You look great. Beautiful.” 
“Really?” You stammer back. “Thank you.” 
Jungkook keeps his eyes on you as he approaches you. “You needed me to zip you up?” 
“O-Oh right, yeah.” Hastily, you turn around, brushing the hair from your back to expose your undone zipper, and your bare back. 
You think that he purposely grazes the tips of his fingers against your skin in his process of bringing the zipper up to the top of the fabric. You’re about to turn, thank him, but his hands back at your waist do the gesture for you. “Thank you.” 
“You’re welcome. You look really pretty.” 
You pout. “You’re being too nice to me.” 
Jungkook whines, hugging you close to him. “You’re too cute.” He noses at your temple. “I just wanted to see you smile.” He pulls away after a moment. “Let’s take care of your face, yeah?” He turns around and returns with a small baggy full of ice. “Here, sit down for a second.” He leaves for a second, returning back with a towel. “Maybe… five minutes each eye. I don’t know. I’ll get ready while we’re waiting.” 
So he takes his suit out from his case and disappears into the bathroom, leaving you alone with a towel of ice pressed against your eye. The cooling sensation definitely helps with the puffiness. 
Jungkook appears from the bathroom a few minutes later—dressed in a black suit with a white button-down and a long skinny black tie. His hair has been fiddled with a little, but he still has that messy, boyish, lovable appearance that makes your heart race. 
“Did you switch the towel?” 
You nod. 
“How do you feel?” 
Slowly, you bring the towel down and rest it on your lap. You look at Jungkook. “How do I look?” 
He leans forward towards you, holding your chin gently between his fingers. “You look better. Did you need to finish getting ready?” 
“Yeah. I just need to touch up my makeup.” 
“Okay, go ahead then.” 
Jungkook takes the towel, and watches as you make your way back to the bathroom. You’re only gone for a few minutes before you’re emerging once more—eyeshadow a little darker, lashes a little closer, and lips slightly pinker, but overall still looking like the same version of the girl he fell in love with. 
The pair of you drive to the wedding venue, a cute brick building with browns, greens, and whites surrounding. Guests already swarm the outside area, some of whom you recognize from college. The sight makes you nervous. 
Jungkook sees this, and he reaches over to grab onto your hand. “You can just stick with me, okay?” He smiles. “I’ll protect you.” 
You roll your eyes, but you are thankful to have Jungkook as your source of comfort and be that person you could run back to. 
He parks and meets you at the front of his car, where you lace fingers and make your way towards the venue. You go through a small round of hellos and ‘nice to finally meet you’ conversations—most notably from Mingyu and Jennie, both of whom light up at the sight of your presence. Contrary to your previous worries, you find that you don’t really need to be so nervous. Mingyu and Jennie are friends of Jungkook’s for a reason—they radiate a relaxing nature that you can tell is what has drawn the three of them to each other. 
They ask about you, your college experience, your current experience, passing easy conversation in the ceremony space right before the start of the wedding. It’s fun to see Jungkook joking around with the friends he grew up with, and even more fun to see how easy you are allowed into that world. 
The actual wedding ceremony is a blur. You vaguely recognize the extremely attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Seokjin at the head of the aisle. You definitely recognize the equally as attractive, excited, and watery-eyed version of Irene, downed in white lace and looking much more beautiful than you ever remember her. Vows are exchanged, kisses are shared, there’s an applause, and pictures are taken before the guests are ushered into the main entry room—decked out with a bar and a few scattered seating areas. Jungkook whispers to you that guests are put here temporarily, as the ceremony space is being converted into a dining area. 
True to Jungkook’s promise, he lingers by your side most of the night. Although you reassure him that you are fine, you are much more emotionally stable compared to a few hours ago, and that perhaps you are okay catching up with Nayeon—another girl from college, actually someone from the first party you ever attended who defended you when you were receiving unwanted attention—but Jungkook simply tells you that he likes being around you. He likes being able to put his arm around you, likes to rest his hand at your waist, likes people knowing that he has you. 
It’s a few more minutes of conversation, of laughter, of old stories being exchanged between people you haven’t seen for years, when the guests are called back into the newly converted dining area. Instead of rows of chairs lined up, there are round tables filling the space. The long panel of doors once closed along the wall of the room have been opened—exposing a gazebo with a D.J. and a dance floor, all encircled by a string of big bright fairy lights. 
You and Jungkook are situated at the same table as most of the guests you recognize from college. You assume this is purposefully done to give you all a common ground, and it works because conversations spring easily between you all. Even when you’re not talking about your experiences from university, you’re able to transition from topic to topic. You and Jungkook occasionally talk amongst yourselves as you’re eating, but you sit together and laugh together when Irene and Seokjin emerge and listen in during the wedding toasts. 
Finally, Irene and Seokjin make their rounds through the room, stopping at the tables to cheer and laugh and exchange a few words of congratulations and conversation. Following this process, everyone at your table stands on their feet as Irene and Seokjin make their way towards you. There are bright smiles, Irene’s cheerful gasp as she takes in all the guests that have come to join her. She circles your table, hugging every guest, continuing this when she reaches you. 
Irene grins at the sight of you. “Y/N! Oh my gosh, it’s been so long!” 
“I know!” You return, pulling away from Irene. “Congratulations. This wedding is beautiful.” 
She beams, absolutely radiating in her white dress and glittering makeup. “Thank you so much for coming! But oh my god, are the rumors true, did you really show up—!” She looks over your shoulder, and grins again. “Jungkook!” She hugs Jungkook. “I should be saying congratulations to the two of you. I was surprised to get the text from Jungkook saying that you guys were coming as each other’s dates. Gave me a whole pain because I had to switch some seats around at the last minute. But anything for my favorite people.” She turns to you and holds onto your arms. “Jungkook has had a crush on you for years, so you’re really doing him a huge favor.” 
“Okay, enough,” Jungkook interrupts, scowling. But there is still that playful look in his eyes. “Did all your friends know about this? Jennie knew something was up too when I texted her.” 
Irene presses her lips together. “Mingyu might have mentioned something.” She presses her hand to Jungkook’s cheek. “Stay safe, you guys. Hope you enjoy the rest of the night.” She moves onto her next guest. 
Jungkook is groaning. “Remind me to never tell Mingyu anything ever again.” He glares at the boy from across the table. “Gonna fling some peanuts at that son of a bitch.” 
You laugh, wrapping your arms around Jungkook’s waist. “Oh, let him be. It’s Irene’s wedding. You can get him tomorrow.” 
Jungkook pouts, but he does wrap his own arm around your shoulder. “Ah, love my girl—promoting evil behavior after festive events.” He kisses your cheek as your table takes their seats once more. 
The good natured atmosphere continues as you and Jungkook down your food, remaining fully engaged in the conversations happening around the table. After another hour of this, the DJ announces the start of the married couple’s first dance. Irene and Seokjin take to the dance floor and spin around, her white dress flowing around the room like light. Underneath the glow of the fairy lights, it looks like the couple is in an entirely new world. And you are so taken by it. 
Jungkook does not turn to you until the DJ plays a slow song—a first slow song after a series of upbeat dance and pop genres. He jerks his head towards the dance floor. “You want to dance?” 
You take his hand when he offers. “Of course.” He leads you across the room, towards the gazebo, where several other couples have moved to cling to one another. Jungkook pulls you in: one hand on your waist and the other with your own hand. “This is really nice,” You start off. 
Jungkook laughs. “The wedding, or the dance?” 
You smile over at him. “Both. Being able to slow dance with you, however, is marginally better.” 
Jungkook is quiet for a little after that. He seems content just staring at your eyes, taking in the magic of this moment. “Thank you for coming with me,” He starts. “The whole road trip thing. Definitely would not have been as fun if I did all that by myself.” 
“Well, thank you for inviting me,” You return. “Even though we had that big misunderstanding. I had a lot of fun.” 
“Hey.” Jungkook angles his head a little so he can look at you in the eyes. “You know that I would never hurt you, right? You’re too important to me that I wouldn’t even think to pull some stupid shit like that again. You know that I love you too much to do that to you, right?” 
“I do know now,” You say, gazing over at him. “And I love you too.” 
You’re not usually an expressive person. But it’s worth saying those words just to see the grin that overtakes Jungkook’s face. It’s worth even more when he leans forward, kissing you openly in front of all his friends, nibbling gently at your bottom lip, running his tongue over the wound, and into your mouth. It’s worth it to have his fingers dusting sweetly over your skin, coaxing your mouth to open to allow exploration. 
It feels like worlds pass before Jungkook pulls away, giving you that breathless smile dimple and all, before he’s leaning forward to bury his face into your neck. 
“I think the drive home will be fun,” Jungkook mutters softly. 
“Hm?” You hum, eyes closed as he presses tiny kisses along your neck. 
“Most definitely,” Jungkook says, lifting himself just enough so that his lips hover over your ear lobe. “Because I plan on fucking you in every hotel bed for the rest of the trip.” 
You feel your heart race, your cheeks heat. Yes, this was definitely worth it. 
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fridayfirefly · 3 years
Text
The Power of Luck [Chapter One]
Read The Power of Luck on AO3
Masterlist [All Works]
Masterlist [The Power of Luck Series]
Written for Maribat March Day 6 - Miraculous Side Effects
The Ladybug Miraculous had quite a few side effects. Marinette was able to think quick on her feet, she was a skilled tactician in battle, and her reaction time was half that of a normal human. Most notably, the Ladybug Miraculous granted its user the force known as Miraculous Luck, which, depending on the situation, was sometimes more of a curse than a blessing. Marinette didn't get to choose how that good luck manifested. For instance, when she needed an extra day to finish a history project, her school closed down due to a gas leak. Or when she wished for a fresh start after the defeat of Hawkmoth, her parents were offered a deal to grow their bakery business in America.
Marinette assured her parents that she didn't mind moving. After all, most of her class had already moved on. Lila had been deported to Italy, narrowly avoiding jail time. Chloé (much to her dismay) was sent by her father to an all-girls boarding school in England. Adrien was taken in by his Aunt Amelie (as Gabriel was in jail and Emilie was declared brain-dead) and moved to England as well.
No one else from Marinette's class left the country, but many of them moved out of Paris. Nathanial was accepted to an elite art school in Marseille. Max was accepted to a gifted program at an elite school in Bordeaux. Officer Raincomprix was transferred to Toulouse and took Sabrina with him. Juleka and Luka both started homeschooling after their mother sailed the houseboat down the Seine to the city of Rouen.
Worst of all was the loss of Alya. Her parents were horrified that the son of Hawkmoth was in the same class as their daughter, and promptly pulled Alya out of class and decided to move out of the city. Alya begged them for weeks but nothing came of her protests. In the end, Alya left too.
The Miraculous Luck could do a lot of things, but it couldn't keep her friends together. Those who remained at François Dupont filled holes in other classes. Marinette tried to make the best of her new class, but she felt no real connection to them. When her parents proposed the move, Marinette jumped on the opportunity. In Gotham, she wouldn't be haunted by the ghost of her old life.
Marinette cut her hair, leaving it choppy and just above the shoulders. She donated all of her brightly colored clothes to the thrift store down the street and created a new wardrobe for herself. It was toned down and mature, much more fitting for Gotham.
Marinette left Paris a much different girl than the naive fourteen-year-old who thought she could save the world. She was ready for a city like Gotham, a city that didn't make any promises, a city where Marinette could set down some new roots.
-----
At first, it was easy to fly under the radar at Gotham Academy. It was a school filled with the self-absorbed children of millionaires and billionaires, after all. Marinette was there on scholarship - her good grades, leadership experience, and working-class parents combined to cut her tuition down by 75%. Marinette quickly learned that scholarship students were at best ignored, and at worst mercilessly bullied. So Marinette kept her head down and vowed that she would get through the year unscathed.
There was one variable, however, that the Miraculous Luck wasn't able to account for. Marinette's entire plan fell apart thanks to one boy: Damian Wayne.
Marinette became acquainted with Damian Wayne through the school's rumor mill. She learned that he was one of the most wealthy and most attractive people in the school, but he was thought himself too good to spend time with any of his fellow classmates (Marinette couldn't fault him on the last bit; she also found the students at Gotham Academy to be difficult, to say the least). Marinette also learned through the school's rumor mill that Damian spent quite a lot of time staring at her. Given that Damian had never paid the slightest amount of attention to a Gotham Academy girl before, this was a big deal. Suddenly Marinette was the farthest thing from under the radar. Everyone who used to look down on her wanted to be her friend. It was exhausting.
Marinette resolved to ignore Damian Wayne - an easy task, given that she still didn't even know what he looked like. Now that everyone was staring at her, it was hard to
"Why?" grumbled Marinette. "Why couldn't my so-called Miraculous Luck help me get through one normal year of school?"
Tikki shrugged from her spot inside of Marinette's backpack. "Maybe all of this attention will turn out to be a good thing?"
"I doubt that." Marinette glanced around, checking that no one had spotted her talking to her backpack. There was one spot in the cafeteria that was hidden from view, a window-sill nestled behind a pillar, bordered by a wall on one side and an out of order vending machine on the other. Marinette sat on the window-sill every day to eat lunch, with Tikki as her companion for the meal.
"I think your problem is that you're overthinking this. Miraculous Luck always works out in the end, even if there are some obstacles in the middle."
"I just want this horrible school year to be over," sighed Marinette, setting her head down in her arms.
"Don't give up yet, Marinette. I have high hopes for this school year," said Tikki.
Marinette had some serious doubts but picked her head up anyway. Maybe this year wouldn't turn out the way she expected. Marinette defeated Hawkmoth, the greatest villain Paris ever faced. She could survive a year of high school.
-----
Marinette was going to survive her senior year of high school. Damian Wayne on the other hand... Marinette still wasn't sure if she was going to let him survive the year, after everything he put her through.
"Excuse me?" a sickeningly sweet voice piped up from behind Marinette.
Marinette put on her best disinterested-face, took out one headphone, and turned around. "Yes?"
There were three girls standing behind her: a blonde, flanked on both sides by a brunette and a red-head. The blonde girl had a smile on her face but a devious look in her eyes. Marinette had long ago learned to spot manipulators, and this girl had it written all over her. "Are you Marinette Dupain-Cheng?"
"Yes."
"My name is Julie Cooper. I was just wondering... Are you dating Damian Wayne?"
Marinette huffed in exasperation. "What do you think?"
Julie's eyes narrowed. "I just wanted to warn you. I mean, did you really think that Damian Wayne would seriously date a girl here on scholarship? You should break up with him before you get hurt."
"It was a rhetorical question. I'm not dating Damian Wayne. It's just a rumor."
Julie instantly perked up. "Oh, good! I was beginning to think that Damian had lost his mind. I mean, I'm sure you would be a nine or a ten at a public school, but at Gotham Academy, you're like a seven, maybe an eight on a good day. Most of the girls who go here are actually hot, not just," the girl waved her hand towards Marinette. "Above average."
Marinette wasn't sure if Julie meant for her to feel flattered or offended, but her words had the strange effect of making Marinette feel both all at once. "Um, thanks? I'm going to go now."
Julie's brunette friend suddenly paled as the girl started to tug on Julie's sleeve. "Um, Julie?" she whispered.
"What, Nora?" Julie's eyes widened as they fixed on something behind Marinette.
Marinette turned around to see what the cause of their concern was. Or rather, to see who the cause of their concern was. It was a boy, tall and scowling. "Are you done here, Cooper?"
Julia nodded, a nervous edge to her voice, "Bye, Marinette." She and her two friends hurried off, exchanging frantic whispers.
"What do you want?" asked Marinette with a sigh. She was tired of dealing with boys who were only interested in her because Damian Wayne was interested in her.
"I wished to apologize."
"For Julie? Did you put her up to this?"
The boy looked confused. "No, of course not. I meant that I wanted to apologize for everything, not just Julie Cooper."
"For everything?" The truth suddenly dawned on Marinette. "You're Damian Wayne! I didn't think that you would be so tall."
"You didn't know what I looked like?" There was real shock in his voice.
"Well, by the time I learned that you had been staring at me everyone was staring at me, so that wasn't much help in figuring out who you were."
"You could have googled me."
Marinette shrugged. "I could have, but it felt weird to google one of my classmates. I pretty much just resigned myself to never figuring out who you were."
"I should have approached you sooner. I've wanted to apologize for a while, but every time I've caught you alone you've looked like you wanted to be left that way."
"I'm not a fan of most of the students here."
"The students here can be..." Damian searched for the appropriate word. "Tiresome. I resigned myself to a dull four years of high school in their company. That is, until I saw you."
Marinette cocked her head. "Why me, though? I'm nothing special."
"You're different than everyone else here."
Marinette stiffened. "I know. I've been told. I'm here on a scholarship which means I don't belong," she snapped
Damian shook his head. "No, that's not what I meant. You move through life differently than all of the other students here. You don't care about the gossip or drama - at least, not until you were right at the center of it all. You've seen the real world, so you float above the high school drama. You're just so... so..."
"So what?" Marinette's tone softened.
Damian ran his hand through his hair, ruffling it. The addition of the messy hair added a certain charm to his otherwise polished exterior. "I've been brainstorming for the right word for weeks. The best I can come up with is pure. You don't let yourself become affected by anything in this school."
It was a very flattering description of her. It was also very on the nose. "I'll forgive you, Damian Wayne, but only on one condition."
"What?"
"I want to get to know you, and I have a feeling that you feel the same way."
Damian nodded. "It's a deal."
Maybe her Miraculous Luck wasn't so useless after all. Marinette had expected to go the whole year without making a single friend. Now, it seemed that she might make one after all.
@maribatmarch-2k21
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mcwriting · 3 years
Text
The Marriage Project (11)
I'm baaaaack :) Sorry it's been so long y'all but I'm finally on break so hopefully I can push out more content soon! Pls enjoy!
Masterlist
Word Count: 2130
Warnings: little bit of language, mild mentions of alcohol
% approximately the last weekend of October/first week of November %
Sunday, you went wedding dress shopping.
Kinda.
It was for homecoming court. Your school had a tradition where the ladies in the running for queen wore white wedding dresses, so your mom and you went out in search of one.
You’d already gotten your dress for the actual dance weeks prior, so you started at the same store.
It didn’t take long for you to stumble upon one you liked, a slim a-line that accentuated your muscles and curves. There was a draped neckline and a somewhat low back. The entire dress had a grecian feel with the small silver accents dusted across it.
The second you put it on you fell in love, so you made the purchase and set off for shoes, easily finding a pair of heels that would put you at a similar level with Tom.
The next day, you made your way to class for another round of praise and congratulations for the tournament that weekend. The trophy was already sitting in the school display case, the plaque yet to be made with your school’s name and the year.
It was spirit week, so everyone was dressed in clothes that fit the day’s theme.
All morning, people were coming up and asking you about the tournament and homecoming, many of them pledging to vote for you.
Things felt nice.
You and Tom didn’t talk much throughout the morning, but exchanged a few jabs and laughs here and there.
Later, you sat around the lunch table with your girlfriends as usual, this time discussing the homecoming nominations.
“Y/n, there’s literally no way you won’t be queen. I’ve talked to a ton of people and all of them are saying they’re gonna vote for you,” one of them said.
“Aw shucks, you’re making me blush. Obviously I’d like to win queen, but we’ll see. It’s whatever. If Harrison wins king I’ll drop out.”
“As if. No one even likes him. I’m pretty sure he was voted in as a meme. Everyone knows Tom is gonna win,” Alexis stated. “And if Tom wins, you’ll win too with everyone thinking you’re together.”
“Hmm. I honestly hope Tuwaine gets the vote. He’s so sweet and totally deserves it.”
“I think we all know you’d prefer Tom as your royal counterpart,” one friend suggested, causing you to roll your eyes.
“How many times do I have to tell you guys! Nothing is going on! On another note, though, I got my white dress,” you mentioned, trying to steer the conversation away.
“Really? Let us see!” Caroline exclaimed.
“Ah, ah, ah. I’m saving it as a surprise for Friday. The only person who’s seen it is my mom, and it’s staying that way until the parade.”
You continued talking about the upcoming festivities and your excitement for the week, and the announcement of who would be crowned queen Friday at the pep rally.
That afternoon, you went to study hall with Alexis. Now that you were between sports, you had a free period to go do art, work out, or just “study,” so you chose the latter as a way to take a breather from everything that had been going on.
“So tell me everything about Johnny’s this weekend. Loved the costumes,” you started as you plopped down at two desks in the very back of the room.
“Not much to report. We mostly just hung out but I heard one dude had to go get his stomach pumped or something after the cops got there. We dipped out before it was busted because it was obvious they were coming. Now how was your weekend, since we’re finally alone?”
You thought about how much you’d actually tell her, especially considering that you hadn’t told her really anything about yours and Tom’s interactions in past weeks.
“Pretty good. It was mostly just volleyball.”
“Oh yeah? What all went down with Tom? Anna told me you seemed pretty close.”
Your face burned.
“We hugged after winning the tournament. Not a big deal. Oh and we maybe kinda pretended to be a couple Friday night.”
“What? You didn’t think to lead with that?!”
“It was for like a minute while we went up the elevator. This drunk couple was harassing us so we just played along for a little bit. Whatever,” you shrugged.
“Did you do anything couple-y? Don’t tell me you guys kissed.”
You tried not to cringe before somewhat telling a lie.
“I kissed him on the cheek and he put his arm around me. I swear it was nothing serious, Lex.”
“Hm. I still think you’ve gotta be hiding something, but I just don’t know what. And I’m gonna get to the bottom of it.”
Good luck with that. I’m not about to crack yet.
%
Spirit week continued with people coming up to let you know their votes had been cast for you. The voting ended Thursday so that votes could be counted before the pep rally.
When Friday did hit, you woke up early and tucked your volleyball jersey into some jeans and tossed on your letter jacket, as the day’s theme was school colors and jerseys.
You popped on some mascara and lip gloss, then headed to school, becoming more nervous as you got closer.
The pep rally would be right after lunch, but almost everyone was so excited for the weekend festivities that teachers basically gave everyone a free day so that the students in charge of the event could continue their planning and the athletes could prepare for the rally.
The pep rally was mostly for the football game, but they were also going to recognize the volleyball team’s accomplishments, so you prepared for that and the whole homecoming court thing.
In home ec, Mrs. Flynn let those that needed to help set up for the pep rally eat your lunches in class and then leave early.
You and Tom finished about the same time and went to your lockers to grab your things.
“Ready to win?” Tom asked as you walked towards the gym.
“Nope. You?”
“Yeah, actually. Maybe it’s just because I love winning so much.”
You gave him a little shove as you continued walking. Tom had his jersey on without the pads, so it fit big on him. You admired the way it draped over his thin, toned frame.
A bit later and the pep rally had begun with the dance team doing their routine, then came athlete recognitions.
They started with the volleyball team, calling you all out to the basketball court to wave as everyone cheered. After you all, the cheer squad hyped everyone up for the football team to come out.
You stood in a corner of the gym with Zendaya, as they would be announcing the homecoming court next. You both talked a little bit, but things were somewhat awkward.
Finally came the time to announce the winners. As with nominations, things went in order from freshman to senior, eventually reaching the king and queen announcement. The six of you stepped out onto the basketball court, the pit in your stomach bigger than before.
“Alright ladies and gentlemen, I know that this is the moment you have all been waiting so patiently for!” Mrs. Johnson looked around the bleachers at the cheering students, holding up her paper with everyone’s positions.
“We’re going to start with our third place, the duke and duchess of homecoming! May I have a drumroll please!”
Everyone stomped their feet and clapped.
“This year’s duke is Mr. Harrison Osterfield, and the duchess is Daisy Ridley!”
Cheers went up, not completely enthusiastic for the pair. You felt a little bit of satisfaction knowing the people you liked least had gotten third place.
“Now for our runners up, the prince and princess!” She paused for effect. “Tuwaine Barrett and Zendaya Coleman!”
More cheers rang out than before. Your jaw dropped as you looked at Tom.
“And that means that your senior king and queen are Tom Holland and y/n y/l/n! Congratulations to all of you. Can’t wait to see you at the parade, game, and dance!” Mrs. Johnson called out, dismissing everyone back to class.
Someone came and placed the crown on your head and slipped a silver sash which read “homecoming queen” over your body. You couldn’t help but slap a hand over your mouth.
“What did I tell you! I knew you’d win!” Tom exclaimed, holding out his hands. You so badly wanted to hug him, but decided not to in front of the whole school, at least not until tomorrow night.
Your friends rushed up and congratulated you, fawning over the crown and sash and laughing. Before you left, you had to return the two items to a teacher so you would have them for later that night.
As you left school that afternoon, you felt like you were floating on air.
%
You were back at the school later that evening, the game just over a couple hours away. There were families lining the street prepared to watch the parade make its way down.
Since leaving the school before, you’d put your hair in loose curls and done a full face of makeup. You tossed on some sweats and zipped up your varsity jacket, taking your dress and shoes along in the car to change there.
You waited until the last minute to slip on the outfit, causing people to fawn over you when you stepped outside to see everyone who was waiting.
Someone pinned the crown to your head and helped you slip on the sash, then led you to the convertible where Tom was waiting. You’d get to ride around sitting on the back waving like you’d always dreamed of doing.
Your heels clacked on the sidewalk as you confidently stepped. Sure, you didn’t wear heels much, but you sure knew how to work them.
It felt like slow motion when Tom turned around and you saw each other for the first time. He was wearing slacks and a sport coat and his curls were perfectly placed around his own crown. You both gasped a little.
“Y/n! You look… you look like-”
“Let me guess. A princess?” you smirked, raising a brow.
“I was gonna say queen.”
You rolled your eyes and chuckled, giving him a little shove. He helped you climb into the back of the car, and someone went to hand you his letter jacket.
“What’s this for?” you asked.
“Usually if it’s cold the queen wears her partners’ letterman over her shoulders if he has one.”
You thought about it. It was pretty chilly, after all.
“You don’t have to wear mine, y/n. Did you bring yours?” Tom asked, making you smile.
“Yeah, actually. I did. Would someone mind going and grabbing it from my stuff? It’s just inside.”
One girl ran and brought it back in a few minutes, and Tom helped drape it over just your shoulders.
“That’s more like it,” he said, giving you a smile as he fixed the neck.
A few minutes later, the cars and floats began moving and families cheered as you passed, waving with a smile on your face.
You and Tom talked to each other quietly as you looked around both sides of the street. When you reached the end, someone had you pose for a couple pictures in the daylight before the football players headed off to get ready for the game.
This was not only homecoming, but senior night, so they all wanted to be on their A-game.
Different people came up to congratulate you and you took pictures with friends, family, and even a few little kids. You were talking with the girls when you felt a hand on your shoulder.
You turned around to find the Holland family, including Nikki’s parents and a woman you assumed to be Dominic’s mom.
“Well I sure am glad to see that people have some decent sense around here,” Grandma said, giving you a warm smile. You gave her a hug then greeted the rest of the family.
“You look beautiful, dear. Congratulations,” said Nikki as she gave you a squeeze.
“Oh, y/n, this is my mother,” Dom explained, gesturing to another elderly woman.
“Just call me Nana, dear. I’ve heard a lot about you.” You smiled as she held your hands in hers.
“Thank you! Tom’s told me about you, too.”
Nikki shot some pictures of you with their family. It felt weird to be in their photos without Tom, but also comfortable, like you’d known them your whole life. You had to hold back a laugh when you took one kissing Paddy’s cheek and making him blush.
Eventually your parents also came over and talked to them, and everyone made their ways to the stadium.
%
A/N: omg it's been way too long since I updated TMP! I just wanted to pre-warn that next chapter will have the heaviest themes of this story. It will have adequate warnings but I want to make everyone aware!
Thanks for reading!
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kissinginkitchens · 3 years
Text
You Bring Me Home—Chapter Ten: When it Rains
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a/n: hi besties!! This one is... tough I’m ngl to y’all. It is the second to the last chapter which is so wild to think about, but alas all good things must come to an end. Hopefully you don’t hate me too much by the end of it but feel free to vent in my inbox :))) much love, Mel <3
Pairing: Hawai’i!Harry x Original Character (Halani <3)
Warnings: swearing, some suggestive humor, ANGST (!!)
Word Count: 7.4 k
catch up on parts one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, and nine
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“Is that my shirt?”
“No,”
Alani squints at the cartoon bee printed on Harry’s white t-shirt and crosses her arms in disbelief. 
“Yes it is! I’ve been looking for it everywhere,”
“Don’t worry, you can have it back soon,” he admits, crawling back into his bed with an apologetic kiss to her pouting lips. “Doesn’t smell like you anymore,”
“Thief,”
Harry scoffs and props himself up on an elbow. “Don’t act like my Spice World jumper isn’t hanging at the foot of your bed right now,”
“You left it there,” Alani defends. “I was merely being kind and looking after said hoodie because it was abandoned by its owner,”
“Oh yeah and you’ve fought real hard to reunite us,”
“Can we get back to the main issue at hand? Which is that I’m kinda pissed off that you look better in that shirt than I do.”
Harry chuckles to himself and presses an affectionate kiss to her temple. “You’re too kind.”
Alani rests her cheek against his chest and listens to the rain pattering harshly against the window, admiring the flashes of lightning that illuminate the dimly lit room. Harry had convinced her to stay the night, worried about her driving home alone in the storm, and he was met with very little resistance. Secretly, he thanks the rain gods for allowing him another night to hold her close. 
********
“H, you gotta tell her,” Jeff had warned the previous night. “I already pushed the flight back a week—”
“I know,” Harry huffed. “I just need a little more time.”
Jeff sighed, rubbing his tired eyes with the heels of his hands. “You have until this weekend when we go away with the girls. One week in Maui, and then it’s back home. I’m sorry.”
********
Harry’s stomach turns remembering the conversation, but he decides to push all the nagging thoughts to the back of his mind and focus on the present. 
“You all packed?” he asks, trailing his fingers up and down her arm. 
Alani drapes her leg over his hip and nods. “Been packed since last week.”
She had been ecstatic the day after Mila and Chad’s wedding when Harry invited her to tag along on the couple’s trip with Jeff, Tom, and their significant others. His eagerness to include her in his friend group was not only reassuring, but exciting. It felt like their lives were coming together, even more so after she had introduced him to her parents. They, of course, had adored him and quickly given their seal of approval. While Alani knew that it was ultimately her choice, it still felt good to have support from the most important people in her life, and she hoped to win his friends over just as easily. Harry, on the other hand, had no doubts that she would fit right into his chosen family. Her name had been cautiously dropped during a weekly FaceTime call with his mother and sister, and he was overjoyed when they enthusiastically grilled him for details. 
What Harry was less sure of, however, was how Alani would react upon hearing that his vacation was up and that he would be headed back to L.A. in a week’s time. It was still early in their relationship and an indeterminate break seemed less than ideal. He had tried to convince both Jeff and the label that he could finish the album in Hawaii, but the same couldn’t be said for Jeff Bhasker, Mitch, Tom, and his new bassist, Adam, who all had families waiting for them back on the mainland. It was too risky personally and financially, so Harry reluctantly negotiated one last week to persuade Alani that a long-distance relationship wouldn’t be a death sentence. 
“What d’you wanna watch?” he asks, sitting up against the headboard to turn on the T.V. 
Alani sighs and settles deeper into his side. “When Harry Met Sally,”
“But it’s not Christmas or New Year’s,”
“So?”
“So,” Harry explains. “We have to wait ‘til the holidays, wouldn’t be right otherwise,”
Alani scoffs and peers up at him with a judgemental look. “So I guess Serendipity is also out of the question?”
“We’ll have all Christmas to get through that list, darlin’,”
Her stomach flips at his suggestion of their future holiday plans. Privately, she had wondered about such things, as well, including what gifts she might get him or where they would spend the holidays. Though still months away, it suddenly felt within reach. 
“Fine,” Alani softens. “The Notebook,”
“And let you drool over what’s-his-face?” Harry pokes. “No fuckin’ way,”
Alani pinches his side and sits up. “Would you stop being insecure about that? I’ve already told you I was just kidding that time,”
“Yeah well, it still stings,”
“Why don’t you tell me your celebrity crush? You know, so I can be totally fine about it because it doesn’t mean anything,”
Harry shrugs, the corners of his lips turning into a playful smirk. “Don’t have one,”
“Liar,”
“M’serious,”
“Why, because you’ve already dated them?”
“Hey,” Harry pouts. “That was a bit snippy,”
Alani’s muscles tighten. She hadn’t realized that his dating history was a sore spot, but she takes a deep breath and plants a sweet kiss to his jaw as an offering of peace. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that,”
“S’alright. Truce?”
“Deal,”
“Jennifer Aniston,”
“Huh?”
“My celebrity crush,” Harry explains shyly. “When I was younger,”
Alani giggles lightly. “I see. Good taste, she’s hot,”
“Don’t tell me you’re gonna leave me for her too,”
“I just might,”
“Can’t say that I blame you,”
“Look I know this is a cute little bit we do,” Alani sits up, her gaze dead-set on Harry’s to communicate the seriousness behind her words. “But I just want you to know that I feel so lucky to be with you. I’m not going anywhere any time soon,”
Harry swallows harshly. It was everything he’d ever wanted to hear and it kills him that he can’t return the sentiment with full honesty. A little less than a week is all he has to prove that even though he physically has to go, his heart will remain wherever Alani is. “Me either,”
Another round of thunder booms outside and the lights fizzle out, leaving the room completely dark save for the intermittent flashes of lightning that gently illuminate the room. 
“So much for watching a movie, huh?” Alani sighs. 
“I think I know some other ways we can keep ourselves entertained.”
********
Harry sets a steaming cup of tea down onto the table in front of Alani and she looks up from her tube of nail polish curiously. Harry flashes a dimpled grin in her direction and whistles a familiar tune, one that she had heard in the studio when he was busy doing his Bob Dylan impression. 
“What’re you singing?”
“Hm?”
“The song,” she clarifies. “You were singing it the other day, what is it?”
Harry serves her plate of hash browns and shrugs. “Dunno, just a little tune ‘ve been workin’ on,”
“It’s nice,”
“Thanks, sweets,” he offers, setting her food down and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. 
“Hey Alani,” Jeff interrupts, stepping into the kitchen with his cellphone pressed to his shoulder.
“Glenne wants to know if you’re okay with her setting up a spa thing for you guys,”
"Yeah, definitely,” Alani perks up. 
“Cool, thanks.”
“Look at you,” Harry teases, taking a bite of his toast coated in strawberry jam. “Minglin’ with the girls,”
“They’re not even here yet,” 
He scans over her appearance and his brows furrow, hit with the sudden realization that she’s dressed in formal attire. 
“What’s with the fancy outfit”
“I have a meeting, remember?”
“With?”
Alani blows on her freshly painted nails and holds up her other hand for Harry to do the same. 
“My senior advisor. We’re going over my research project,”
Harry’s brows raise. “Smarty-pants,”
Alani had scheduled her meeting with Dr. Hudson months ago and had, truthfully, forgotten all about it until she had received a courtesy email the day prior. She had been working on her proposal in the spare minutes she had away from Harry, which were few and far between, but she knew the initial meeting would be much more casual. Alani checks the time on her phone and stands quickly when she realizes that she is supposed to meet Dr. Hudson in  less than thirty-minutes. 
“Gotta go,” she offers, shoveling potatoes into her mouth and grabbing her bag. 
Harry ceases blowing on her nails and kisses the back of her hand before sticking out his lips for a kiss of his own. “Good luck, darlin’. Meet me at the studio after?”
“Sure thing, sunshine. See you later.”
********
“How did the Joni Mitchell piece go? You never told me,” Dr. Hudson questions, taking a sip of her coffee. 
Alani offers a shy smile and toys with the hem of her skirt. “A flop,”
“Just one more closer to the winner,”
“Yeah,” Alani sighs, stirring her smoothie. “Maybe it’s time to move on from that,”
The professor shoots her a disapproving look and sets her drink down. “Alani—”
“I just think maybe there’s more realistic—”
“You are not giving up,” Dr. Hudson reassures her. “You’ve come too far and you’re a terrific writer. One of the best I’ve ever had the pleasure of teaching. These things take time,”
Alani nods gently, her lips pursed in a tight smile. “Thank you, that really means a lot,”
“What are you working on right now?”
Absolutely nothing, Alani thinks, but then she remembers the half-written article about Harry sitting in her files. 
“A short piece about… a local musician,”
Dr. Hudson’s brows raise, intrigued, and she nods. “That sounds interesting. Definitely more personal,”
You have no idea. “Thanks. I mean, it’s not really anything—”
“I’d love to read it when you’re finished,” the professor continues. “What’s the scope?”
Alani thinks, trying not to give too much incriminating detail about her subject or their relationship. 
“Well,” she starts, hesitant. “He’s writing new music and working on his first album. I guess I kind of want to follow his journey and redefinition of success in the music industry,”
Dr. Hudson hums. “I love it. Send me a draft.”
Alani swallows and takes a minute to consider the offer. Surely there couldn’t be anything wrong about sharing her work privately with her advisor. She had been so excited about the potential of the article when it was first started, but it had since been neglected like so many of her other rejected pieces. Starting again seemed exciting, and she knew that Harry would be pleased to play such an important role in making her dreams come true. That had, after all, been the initial terms of their agreement. 
“Okay,” Alani accepts. “I will.”
********
Harry draws out the last note and Mitch lets the chord ring between them for a moment. 
“I think that’s the one,”
“Yeah, I liked that progression better,”
“Hope you got that, Bhasker,” Mitch calls to Jeff in the sound booth, who gives a thumbs up in response. 
Harry continues humming, his head still bobbing to the tune, when he hears the studio door creak unpleasantly. His eyes shoot up to find Alani wincing and timidly stepping into the room. 
“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt,”
He softens and beckons her over. “Never an interruption, sweets,”
Alani slots herself between his legs and wraps her arms around his neck, giving a gentle peck to the tip of his nose before pressing their lips together.
“How’s the weather?”
“Just got a lot sunnier,”
“Meeting go well?”
She nods and twists a lock of his chestnut hair between her fingers. “Yeah, actually,”
“Then we should celebrate!” Harry perks up, peppering a kiss to her cheek. “Dinner, wine, movie, the whole shebang,”
Alani frowns, thinking back to the article she promised Dr. Hudson. “Hmmm, raincheck?”
Her boyfriend deflates. “You’re ditching me?”
“Just for one night,” she explains, pulling him closer. “I wanna finish up some school stuff before our trip. Otherwise I won’t be able to give you my full attention,”
Harry pouts, but he nods understandingly. “‘Kay,”
“I’m sorry, sunshine. I’ll miss you tons,”
“Ditto, sweets,”
Alani presses her forehead against his and her fingertips wander through the growing curls at the nape of his neck. “Please don’t be upset,”
Harry smiles warmly and smoothes his hands up and down her back. “Never, m’love. Could never be upset with you,”
“Promise?”
“Promise,” he nods, planting a sweet kiss to her lips. “Hey, I wanna play you somethin’,” 
Alani grins and pulls back a bit to read his expression. “Let’s hear it,”
Harry grabs the guitar next to him and slings it over his shoulder before adjusting the capo. The song starts sweet and gentle, his voice light to match the tune. 
And oh we started 
Two hearts in one home 
It’s hard when we argue 
We’re both stubborn I know, but oh
Sweet creature, sweet creature
Wherever I go, you bring me home 
Sweet creature, sweet creature
When I run out of road, you bring me home 
Alani watches in awe as he pours so much emotion behind every word, his vocals effortlessly powerful and rich. She claps when the song finishes and leans in for a kiss. 
“I love it,”
“S’not finished yet,” Harry shrugs, still fiddling with the strings. “Just the chorus right now,”
“Will you teach it to me?”
His brows raise in surprise. “You play?”
“No,” Alani admits. “But I have a feeling you’re a good teacher,”
“Well, let’s see what you got,”
Alani turns and Harry props the guitar in her lap, his arms wrapping around her as he guides her into the right position. His left hand demonstrates the beginning chord and she replaces his fingers on the fretboard to try for herself. She strums and the beginning note resonates in near-perfect pitch. 
“Hey,” Harry beams. “You’re a regular Hendrix,”
He continues positioning her fingers over the right spaces and letting her strum, humming the lyrics softly into the shell of her ear. 
“We don’t argue that much,” Alani defends playfully. 
Harry chuckles and kisses her temple. “Maybe not, but we’re really good at makin’ up.”
“Easy, Styles.”
********
Harry: Hungry?
Alani peels her eyes away from the computer screen and reads the message lighting up her phone. 
Alani: Not really
Harry: …
Harry: oh 
She laughs and pads over to the window. Sure enough, Harry holds up two bags and flashes a cheesy grin down below. 
“Need a study break?”
“I’ll meet you at the door.”
Harry makes himself comfortable in the middle of her bed and unpacks the bags. 
“I’ve got a California and a spicy tuna for my favorite girl,” he announces. “With a side of eel sauce,”
“And the world's best boyfriend goes to Mr. Harry Styles,” Alani grins, taking a seat next to him. 
He smirks and pulls out his own order of miso soup and sushi. “How’s the homework comin’ along?”
“Not too shabby,”
“Glad to hear it,”
“Hey, what time do I meet you at the airport tomorrow?” she asks, dipping her roll in the sauce. 
Harry freezes and turns to her with confusion written all over his face. “I’m sorry, did my girlfriend just insinuate that we’re not leaving for the airport together?”
“I really need to finish this,” Alani explains. “It’s almost there,” 
“Two nights?” he complains. 
Alani nudges him with her shoulder and shakes her head. “We’re gonna be spending an entire week together, non-stop. You’re gonna get sick of me,”
“Never,” Harry rebuts. “Not possible,”
“Just one more night,” Alani bargains. “Then I’m all yours, no interruptions.”
He nods and takes a sip of his soup. “Alright, deal.”
You have to tell her, Jeff’s voice rings in his mind. 
********
The airline stewardess ushers Harry and Alani to their seats while Scott and Miles settle down a few rows behind. She didn’t know exactly what to expect from first-class, but suddenly the perks of having a famous boyfriend increased tenfold by the sight of their luxurious accommodations.
“Wait, what are you doing?” Alani asks while Harry hovers over his chair. 
“Sitting, or I was about to,”
“And you’re not even gonna offer rock-paper-scissors for the window seat?”
Harry shakes his head with an amused chuckle. “No because I already know that you’re gonna get up to pee every five minutes,”
“Not true,”
“It is too true and it’s exactly why we can’t cuddle while we fall asleep,”
“Or maybe the reason is because I’m claustrophobic and I just don’t wanna hurt your feelings,”
Harry frowns. “Really?”
“No,” Alani admits, taking the aisle seat. “I just said that so you’d give me the window,”
“Get up, we’re switching,”
“Thank you, sunshine! You’re the best,”
Harry slumps into his new chair and crosses his arms. “Forty-five minutes and we’re already fighting like an old married couple,”
“Oh really?” Alani smirks. “Is that what old married couples argue about? Who gets the window seat?”
“And leaving the toilet seat up, going antique shopping—” 
“—What old married couples have you been hanging out with—?”
“—Picking up the kids from school,”
Alani presses a kiss to his shoulder and rests her head in the crook of his neck. Her eyelids are still heavy from staying up the night before, but her article was completely finished and sent off to Dr. Hudson just like she’d promised. Now, she could enjoy her vacation free of any worry or obligation, completely focused on the perfect boy still rambling next to her. 
“But, obviously I mean that doesn’t count, right?” Harry asks, craning his neck and smiling softly when he sees that his girlfriend has already dozed off. He kisses the top of her head gently and lets his own eyes flutter close with a deep, contented breath. 
********
“And then I’ll have to repaint it, but I haven’t decided on a color yet,” Glenne explains to Alani as they stroll through the airport. 
Alani hums. “It was your grandmother’s?” 
“Well, it was somebody’s grandmother’s. We picked it up at this little antique shop in Santa Monica.”
Jeff escorts Glenne into the shuttle car while Harry and Alani share a knowing look and stifle their laughter. They shuffle into the back seats as Tom and his wife, Jenny, claim the middle row. 
“So you’re a journalist?” Jenny asks, turning in her seat eagerly to face Alani. 
“Not quite,” she explains with a polite smile. “Still a student, but hopefully someday,”
Jenny nods and twirls the ring around her finger. “Sounds exciting. Maybe you can hitch a ride on tour with this one and do some writing there.”
“Yeah,” Alani smiles, settling further into Harry’s side. “Maybe.”
The idea of traveling the world with Harry and being a part of the excitement of touring the album was something she had considered briefly, but hadn’t allowed herself to fully indulge until this moment. It was already thrilling to see him polish the songs he had begun during his trip, but she could only imagine how much more special it would be to see him perform them for the rest of the world. A twinge of jealousy sparks at the thought of having to share any part of him with the public, but Alani knows that his gifts are much too special to keep all for herself. Harry was golden and he deserved to shine in all of his radiant glory. That was exactly what she had penned in her article, and she said it not because he was her boyfriend and there were clear personal investments, but because she knew it was true even before he had shown any romantic interest in her. 
“What’s tour like?” Alani pipes up as Harry watches the landscape out his window. 
He considers it for a moment and clears his throat. “Fun, mostly. Can be tiring,”
“Lots of partying and adoring fans?”
“No,” he chuckles to himself. “Not so much the partying. Enthusiastic fans, sure,”
Alani narrows her eyes. “No partying?”
“Nope,” Harry reiterates. “Don’t really like to do all that stuff when I’m working. Also just didn’t wanna…”
He trails off and Alani waits a beat to see if he’ll continue. “Didn’t wanna?”
“Fuck it up,” he finishes. “You know, like, be the one who ruined a good thing for a little bit of fun.”
She lets his words settle in, rubbing a reassuring circle on the back of his hand. “Makes sense. Sounds really responsible of you to do that.”
Harry presses a soft kiss to her temple and resumes his study of the scenery. They chat amongst their friends for the remainder of the drive and Alani immediately presses Glenne and Jenny for information about her boyfriend in his younger years. They indulge her inquiries and ask their own questions, deciding privately after a few minutes that her and Harry are a good fit. 
When the group arrives at the resort, Glenne takes charge and instructs them all to meet at the lobby for lunch in twenty minutes. They collect their keys and head up to their respective rooms, which are all located on the very top floor. 
“What a view,” Alani muses as she takes in the sight from their private balcony. 
Harry admires the wonder on her face and nods, his eyes not leaving her side profile. “You’re tellin’ me,”
“Let’s never go home,” she poses, arms snaking around his torso. “Let’s stay here forever, just me and you,”
His throat tightens as he thinks back to the inevitable conversation waiting for them. Harry didn’t know why it was so hard to think about leaving because he had every intention of keeping touch and making their relationship work at all costs. But there was a part of him, a very tiny recess in the back of his mind, that feared the possibility of Alani not feeling the same. 
“Yeah,” he agrees with a gentle kiss to the tip of her nose. “Whatever you want, sweets,”
Alani senses a shift in his demeanor, but she can’t read it. “You okay?”
“Never better,” Harry swallows, mustering up a small smile. “But I am hungry,”
She isn’t entirely convinced that there isn’t something bothering him, but she decides not to push it and tightens her grip around his waist, instead. 
“Race you to the lobby.”
“You’re on.”
********
“You’ve never seen Finding Nemo?”
“Was I s’posed to?”
“My god,” Alani marvels. “You know, I’m starting to believe those rumors that you were grown in a lab,”
Harry’s brow raises and he blinks. “That I was what?”
The restaurant that Glenne and Jeff chose features an aquarium tunnel at the entrance, much to both Harry and Alani’s excitement. Fish, large and small, swim around them and the pair take turns pointing out their favorite colorful species. The Hull’s snap photos for their four year-old daughter, but Jenny also secretly captures one of Harry and Alani with their hands clasped under the mesmerizing blue lighting as a keepsake for her friend. 
“Add Finding Nemo to our movie list,” Alani says, admiring a clownfish that swims close to the glass. 
“S’it  gonna make me cry?”
“Probably,”
“Goddamnit,” 
Alani giggles softly and turns her head away from the glass to silently observe Harry under the lighting of the rippling water. The combination of his serene features and the sound of Billie Holiday’s I’ll Be Seeing You over the sound system creates a perfect image in her mind, one that makes her afraid to blink, lest it be gone forever. Harry glances over at her through the corner of his eye and his lips curl. 
“Checkin’ me out?”
“Always,”
“Like whatcha see?”
“Love it.”
His heart nearly stops at her words, but before he has a chance to process their implication, the hostess calls on their group. 
“And I’ll have the piña colada,” Harry orders once they're seated. 
“Oh my god, H,” Glenne laughs from across the table. “That reminds me, remember your birthday last year when James got trashed and hoarded the karaoke machine for, like, two hours?”
“Ruined that song forever,” Jeff quips, reliving the memory of the Late-Late host drunkenly serenading the entire party with the same song on repeat. 
Harry cringes, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I try not to,”
Alani watches as they reminisce on the event, adding their own details and pieces to the puzzle. It’s amusing to watch, but a small part of her also has to fight the pang of exclusion settling into the pit of her stomach. She feels guilty for being affected by it knowing, logically, that it isn’t intentional or malicious in any way. Still, Alani is painfully reminded of the vast differences between their worlds. Harry had gotten to know practically every part of her life, including her family, but there was still so much that she didn’t know about his. It was something she worked hard not to dwell on, given the novelty of their relationship, but she also worried that fear and insecurity would prevent her from investing what little of her heart Harry hadn’t claimed yet. 
“Who was it that started dancing on a table and almost broke a chandelier?” Tom asks, wracking his brain. 
“I think it was Ken—” Jeff hesitates, clearing his throat. “Actually, I don’t remember,”
Harry shifts in his seat beside Alani and reads over the menu, quickly changing the subject. “What’re you gonna get?”
“I don’t know,” Alani admits. “Everything looks so good,”
“Oh look,” Jenny pipes up across from Harry. “They’ve got your fav, the mango sorbet. I wonder if it’s as good as the one in Italy,”
Harry beams and reads over the item. “Oh yeah, that was amazin’,” 
Alani files the detail to the back of her mind. She hadn’t known mango was his favorite flavor of anything, and while it was a trivial detail, she realized that there were so still many little details about him that she wanted to know. Harry had made such an effort to remember everything about her, like her go-to sushi order and the fact that she always saved the kiwis for last in her fruit salad, so it made her feel a touch guilty that she hadn’t made the same effort. 
“Wanna share the coconut shrimp?” Alani asks with a gentle nudge to his shoulder. 
“Oh, uh—”
“He’s allergic,” Glenne says offhandedly, not cold or condescending, but more in the same way that an older sister would. 
“Oh my god,” Alani’s eyes widen. “I’m so sorry,”
Harry laughs lightly and shrugs. “S’okay, I’d let you poison me,”
“I didn’t mean to be rude,” Glenne apologizes, reaching her hand out to Alani. “I thought you knew.”
Alani accepts the hand and waves away her concern. “No, don’t worry about it. I didn’t know, actually.”
“We can stop talking about my defects now,” Harry teases. “‘M not dyin’,”
He leans in closer to Alani and presses a kiss to her temple. “But if I was, it’d be an honor to have my last meal with you.”
She responds with a soft smile before returning her attention back to the menu. His sentiments, however sweet, unfortunately did very little to soothe the embarrassment of her mini faux pas. It was irrational, Alani knew this, but it made her wonder what else she didn’t know and what bigger secrets he was potentially keeping. Whose name had Jeff meant to say earlier to identify the mystery dancer at Harry’s party, and why had it created an awkward shift in the air? She decides not to let the spiraling questions spoil her fun and takes a generous sip of her cocktail to avoid them for the time being. 
********
Harry sets the room key on the nightstand next to their king sized bed and lets himself sink down into the soft mattress. The group had spent the entire day sightseeing, from botanical gardens to scenic beaches, but he was really itching for some quality time alone with Alani. Lately, their time together had been cut frustratingly short by work, school, and life in general. Even when they were seated right next to each other with arms linked or fingers interlocked, she felt far away and he didn’t know why. He hoped that this trip would allow them time to reconnect and solidify their relationship before he had to return to California. 
“Mini bar,” Alani comments, kicking her shoes off and wandering over to the small refrigerator in their suite. “Who’s paying again?”
“The label,”
“Thank you Columbia Records,”
She swipes a few bottles of tequila before climbing into the bed next to Harry. 
“Wanna play a game?”
Harry props himself up on his elbow and nods. “What kinda game?”
“Never have I ever,” Alani explains. “But instead of putting your finger down, you take a shot,”
“Sounds dangerous,”
“It’ll be fun. You can go first if you want,”
He hums and nods in agreement before sitting up to face her. “‘Kay. Never have I ever...named my car after a musician,”
“Cheap shot,” Alani narrows her eyes, taking a sip from the bottle of Jose Cuervo. 
“Your turn,”
She fiddles with the bottle cap, a question already in mind, though she isn’t sure if she should ask it. 
“Never have I ever… dated a model,”
Harry’s brow furrows, but he opens his own bottle slowly and takes a sip. “So it’s that kind of never have I ever,”
“Just trying to keep it interesting,” Alani shrugs innocently. 
“Right. Never have I ever slept with a guy named David,”
Her eyes widen, but she laughs half-heartedly and takes a sip. “Jeez, okay. Never have I ever—”
“Wait, so you two actually…” Harry interrupts, trailing off at the end. 
“I mean,” Alani starts, her eyes wandering to the ceiling. “Yeah, a long time ago,”
“How long ago?”
“Okay, maybe this was a mistake—”
Harry shakes his head. “No, I’m sorry. I’ll play nice,”
“Alright,” Alani accepts. She knows that she should probably steer the game back onto safer territory, but the wound has been re-opened and she can’t resist the urge to keep picking at it. “Never have I ever slept with a fan,”
Harry takes a slow sip. “Never have I ever cheated on my partner,”
The bottle stays put in Alani’s hand. “Never had I ever gone on a vacation with my partner before this trip,”
The tequila washes over his tongue bitterly like the faint memories that it symbolizes. “Never have I ever dated someone just for the publicity,”
The bottle in Alani’s hand doesn’t move, much to Harry’s relief, but her mind is not as tranquil. 
“Never have I ever told someone I loved them when I didn’t,” she says slowly.  
Harry takes another shot and it burns all the way down. “Why are we doin’ this?”
“I don’t know, but I don’t wanna play anymore,”
“Alani,” he starts, springing to his feet when she leaves the bed. “Hey, look at me, please,”
She blinks back the tears that threaten to spill over her lower lashes before turning to him. “I’m sorry, that was a stupid game,”
“S’just all out of context,” Harry offers, reaching for her hands. “Wasn’t the right way to have all of those conversations,”
Alani takes a deep breath and nods. “Yeah, you’re right,”
“What’s really botherin’ you, hm sweets?” He coos, bringing her cold knuckles to his warm lips. “Tell me, please?”
She releases a shaky breath and tries to sift through the fog in her brain for the right answer.
 “I don’t know, really, I just,” Alani hesitates. “Am I a bad girlfriend?”
“No,” Harry says quickly, his hands lifting to cup her face. “God no, you’re the best,”
“Then why didn’t I know that your favorite ice cream flavor was mango? And why didn’t I know that you were allergic to coconut, and why—”
“Hang on, is that what this is all about?” he questions. “Cause I’ll go eat an entire coconut right now,”
Alani laughs lightly and pinches her eyes shut. “No, it’s not about that. I just feel like you’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met and you make me feel so fucking special and, God, I just wanna be good enough for you because—”
Harry holds his breath and watches as her eyes gloss over. 
“Because I love you,” she finishes, voice small. “More than I ever thought possible,”
His own eyes sting, but he doesn’t fight the tears that fall as he presses his lips to hers firmly. 
“I love you, too,” Harry murmurs. “I love you so fuckin’ much it drives me crazy,”
Alani chuckles softly. “Ditto,”
“I’ve been wanting to say it for ages, can’t believe you beat me to it.”
“Guess you’re not the only one full of surprises.”
********
The early morning sunlight creeps gently into Harry and Alani’s room, casting a soft, golden glow onto the bare skin that peeks through the white duvet. Harry stirs first, a strand of Alani’s hair tickling his nose and making him smile. He prys his heavy eyelids open and winces at the dull aching of his head aggravated by the light. Alani hears his muffled groan and sighs, willing the sun to go back down and let her sleep a few more hours. 
“Mornin’ sweets,” he rasps with a warm kiss to her bare shoulder. 
She peels her own tired eyes open and flashes a sleepy grin. “Good morning, sunshine,”
“How’d you sleep?”
“Super. You?”
Harry props himself up on his elbow and rests his chin in his palm as he admires the traces of sleep still on her face.
“Just swell.”
Alani chuckles lightly and reaches a hand up to comb through his unruly bedhead. His skin is warm to the touch, and the light from the window casts a heavenly glow around his visage. She pokes her finger into his dimple, which elicits a soft laugh and makes his smile grow wider. They stay intertwined under the sheets as the sun fully rises and soak up their own details to keep as souvenirs from this moment. Alani takes in the scent of vanilla and the juxtaposition of Harry’s inked bicep against the plain, white sheets. He stores away the image of her sleepy, mocha eyes and the pink, manicured fingernails that trail up and down his arm. Neither of them are sure exactly how long they remain in this moment, for all they know it could be hours or days. But whatever the duration, it doesn’t seem to be enough. I need more time, Harry had told Jeff, but there was no more left to give. He had to tell her, and it was now or never. 
“Hey,” he begins carefully. “I need to tell you something,”
Alani sits up to be eye level with him and nods. “Anything,”
Harry waits a beat, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear and pressing his lips to her bare shoulder before letting the confession spill out. 
“I have to go back to L.A.,”
 “I kinda figured,”
He draws in a deep sigh of relief. “You did?”
“Yeah,” Alani shrugs. “Hilo isn’t exactly Hollywood,”
“I asked for more time, but the label—”
“No, I get it. So… when? Next month?”
“Friday,”
Alani’s brows furrow. “This Friday?”
“Yeah,” Harry admits with a gulp. 
“The last day of our trip?”
“Yes,”
Her heart drops into her stomach and she feels sick. It all made sense now why Harry’s mood had shifted when she jokingly asked him not to leave, and why he had been so insistent on spending as much time together as possible this week. Their game of never have I ever turned instantly defensive when asked about his dating history. Never had I ever gone on vacation with my partner before this trip. Never have I ever told someone I loved them when I didn’t. He had whisked her away on a farewell trip and God knows who else had been in her place before, or worse, who would be in it next. Harry was saying good-bye. 
“Wait,” Alani says finally, mind still racing too fast to process. “How long have you known?”
“Alani—”
“How long?”
Harry swallows. “Couple of weeks,”
“You knew for weeks and you didn’t tell me?” she questions incredulously.
“I tried—”
“You know that I hate surprises, you know how I feel about plans—”
“I’m sorry,” Harry insists, sitting up straighter. “I wanted to tell you so many times, but it just never felt right,”
Alani rolls her eyes. “So what, you were just gonna leave a fucking sticky note on my pillow and hope for the best?”
“Don’t say that—”
“Is that why you brought me here?” she asks, voice hoarse. “Is that why you gave me this necklace? A souvenir of our little summer fling so you could leave with a clear conscience?”
Harry’s jaw tightens. “How could you even think that?”
“Because maybe it’s true. Why else would you wait until the very last minute to tell me about this?”
“Maybe we should take a minute,” he suggests, the whites of his eyes now bloodshot. “Before we say something we’ll regret,”
“I think I already did.” Alani admits. Never have I ever told someone I loved them when I didn’t. 
Harry’s head pounds and he feels like he’s drowning, treading water in every direction only to be dragged further into the current. He quickly pulls on his clothes from the night before and tries to steady his breathing. 
“M’gonna go wait in the hall,” he offers. “Give you some space to think and then we’ll talk, yeah?”
Alani doesn’t respond or even meet his pleading eyes. She simply tightens the duvet around her body and turns her head to the window, letting a single, bitter tear roll down her cheek. The door closes softly and she is immediately filled with regret and guilt. Had she truly meant all of the things she said? Or was it fear and the instinct to flee taking over her mouth? Alani wanted to believe that she was wrong and that Harry hadn’t intentionally kept her in the dark, but from where she stood, the sun had long disappeared behind the clouds and all that was left was the storm. 
Harry trudges down the hallway and the walls spin, closing in on him slowly. If he had just told Alani sooner, everything would be different. He had avoided doing so for this exact reason and out of fear that their relationship wouldn’t be worth the risk in her mind. It was selfish—he was selfish—to try to make the decision for her, and now the woman he loved was getting ready to walk away because he had broken her trust. What else was there to do? His back meets the wall and he sinks to the floor. 
“Hey H,” Jeff clears his throat from above. “We should talk,”
“She knows. Didn’t go well,”
“So she did approve the article?” 
Harry lifts his head and his brows furrow. “What?”
There’s a harsh knock at the door and Alani jumps. In Harry’s absence, she had managed to cool off and sift through her frantic thoughts. She had been wrong to think that he used her, all it took was a quick stroll down memory lane to prove otherwise. He had never given her any true reason not to trust him, so there had to be some other reason why he hadn’t told her about his plans to leave so soon. Alani pads over to the door and unlocks it gently. 
“Harry, I’m sor—”
“Wanna talk about surprises?” he seethes. “What the fuck is this?”
She squints at the phone screen that he holds up to her face and the title of her unpublished article stares back at her. 
“I don’t know—”
“Well it has your goddamn name on it,” Harry shoots back. 
Alani steps aside and lets him into the room before she closes the door behind her. “I can explain—”
“Did you write it or not?”
“Yes, but—”
He shuts the phone off and slams it face down onto the night stand. “How fucking dare you call me a liar and then pull this shit behind my back,”
“I didn’t lie,” Alani defends, voice weak. “I had no idea it was going to be published, please just listen—”
“A class project,” he interrupts with his back still turned. “That’s what you said,”
“It was never meant to be released,”
“How do I know that? How do I know you’re not just trying to cover your ass?”
“Please,” Alani begs as her vision begins to blur. “I was wrong, I shouldn’t have said all those things,”
Harry runs a hand through his hair and casts his eyes to the ceiling in an attempt to quell the emotion that pools behind his eyes. 
“So why did you?”
“I was scared,”
“Of?”
Alani takes a deep breath. “Of losing you for good. Of falling in l—”
“Don’t,” he interrupts. “Don’t finish that sentence,”
“I don’t know how,” she tries again. “And I don’t know who released it, but I swear—”
“You really expect me to trust a word you say after you accused me of lying about this whole thing, about us?”
Harry’s  gaze lowers back to hers and the bright, green eyes that she has come to love are replaced with a blood-shot, stormy sea that makes her stomach drop. The words get caught in her throat. 
“I fucked up,” he continues. “I know that I should’ve told you. But I’m having a hard time believing that this wasn’t planned, that this random website would just accidentally publish your work without your consent,”
Alani can’t explain it either, she truly had no idea how her writing had ended up in the wrong hands. There was only one other person she had entrusted it with, but surely Dr. Hudson hadn’t betrayed her, had she? Alani didn’t know who to believe anymore. 
“Harry, I’m so sorry,” she tries. “I didn’t mean what I said, and I know I can’t take it back, but you have to at least believe that I never wanted to hurt you,”
Harry is silent for a moment, and Alani decides that it’s her turn to tell the truth. There was nothing left to lose. 
“At first, I did want to publish it,” she explains. “But I changed my mind and I scrapped the whole thing. In the end, the only person I intended to show it to was you,”
“So how did it get onto the internet for the whole fucking world to see?” he presses. 
Alani sighs. “My advisor wanted to know what I was working on, so I sent it to her, but she never had my permission to publish it. Now I realize how stupid it sounds, but it’s the truth,”
“If you had come to me, I would have given you permission,”
“I’m so sorry,”
Harry’s shoulders tense. Every fiber of his being  wants to believe her, but how could he? She had told him herself that things would be messy and warned him that he didn’t know what he was asking by pursuing a relationship with her. Maybe it really was all his fault for not seeing the signs, but that still didn’t change the fact that he couldn’t trust her anymore. And based on her reaction to the news of his departure, it seemed as though Alani didn’t trust him either. 
“Even if you’re telling the truth,” Harry begins, slow and deliberate. “You still thought, after everything, that I would abandon you. And if that’s the kind of person you think I am, if that’s the person you wrote about—”
“Harry—”
“Then I hope you got all the material you wanted.”
“Please, don’t go.” Alani cries but it’s too late. The door slams and her heart falls. 
After a beat, she races to the door and into the hallway but there’s no sign of Harry. As quickly as he had appeared into her life, he had vanished. Gone without a trace.
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elspethc22 · 3 years
Text
Five Nights of Summer
Sciles week day 5: Summer Nights
Pairing: Scott/Stiles
Word count: 3649
Five Summer Nights
Summer Before Freshman Year
‘Man, I can’t believe we’re gonna be in high school in a month!’ Stiles exclaimed (not for the first time this summer) from his spot on Scott’s bed. Scott turned from his desk to look at Stiles, rolling his eyes.
‘I know, dude. We’ve done this already.’
‘Yeah, but high school, Scotty. It’s a whole new ballpark! This is the year, man! This is the year Lydia Martin is finally gonna notice me.’ Stiles told him, sitting up, a look of determination on his face.
‘If you say so, Stiles.’ Scott said, wanting to believe for his buddy’s sake, but pretty sure that this year would be just like the last… six, was it? He’d lost count of how long his friend had been in love with Lydia Martin. ‘I’m bored, man. It’s Friday night, and we’re sitting around doing nothing, again.’
Stiles got that look in his eye which usually meant trouble was coming his way, and Scott almost regretted opening his mouth. Then again, Stiles’ record for getting them back out of trouble after getting them into was getting better. And his plans had like, a ninety percent fun rating, trouble or no.
Scott grinned, leaning forward in anticipation of whatever Stiles had come up with. A few hours later, he’d think back and regret that anticipation when the Sheriff was hauling them both by the necks of their tops and all but shoving them into the back of his cruiser.
Then again, when Stiles turned to him, grinning, as soon as his dad was gone, Scott couldn’t help but grin back. Sneaking into a high school party had been awesome – right up until someone had called the cops on it, and Stiles and Scott had been caught by Stiles’ dad. But, since they hadn’t been there long (and Scott was still able to exert some level of control over Stiles’ wilder ideas) they hadn’t had any alcohol so at least they had that on their side when their parents decided on punishments. And they didn’t know any other people in their year who had ever been to a real high school party before. Maybe Stiles was right. Maybe this year would be different.
Summer before Sophomore Year
‘Come on, dude, I wanna make first line this year, that means practicing.’ Scott said, staring at Stiles who was sprawled across his bed. Scott stood in the doorway of Stiles’ room, lacrosse stick in hand, staring at his best friend.
‘But Scott! It’s summer!! Summer is meant to be for fun and sleeping and being lazy.’
‘Dude, you’re always lazy.’ Scott laughed, and Stiles shot his hand up in the air, giving Scott the finger. ‘Come on, you practice with me this afternoon, and it’s your pick for tonight.’
It was Friday night, and Stiles had spent the last few complaining they never did anything exciting. So as expected, when Scott dangled that possibility, Stiles sat up.
‘Really? Anything I pick?’ He asked, already looking like he was in planning mode. Scott nodded.
‘Anything.’
When he’d promised that, Scott really didn’t imagine it meant he was going to be spending his Friday night in the mall trying to find Lydia Martin because Stiles had apparently overheard one of her friends making plans over the phone when he’d gone to the shop for milk that morning.
They’d been at the mall for nearly an hour now, and they’d already tried countless shops that Stiles was sure would be the type Lydia would go to, and not a single sighting of her.
‘Dude, your dad finishes his shift in less than an hour, and if we’re not ready to go when he gets here you know he’ll leave us and we’ll have to get the bus and then walk back to your place.’ Scott said, and Stiles threw him a quick glance.
‘Don’t worry, Scotty, we’ll find her, I’m sure of it. Come on, there’s a few more places we haven’t tried, she’s got to be at one of them.’ Stiles sped up and Scott rolled his eyes. The things he did because Stiles talked him into it.
As they sat on the bus nearly two hours later, having never found Lydia, Scott chose to ignore his sulking best friend in favour of playing around on his phone. When that got boring, he opened the camera on his phone, and started taking photos. First he tried a few of himself but they kept coming out blurry or his aim was way off. So he switched to taking photos of Stiles.
He managed to take a few before Stiles realised what was going on, then he started complaining, then moved swiftly to making silly faces at the camera. When Scott was checking one of the photos, Stiles stole his phone from his hand and suddenly Scott found himself on the other side of the camera.
He scrunched up his nose, then decided to mimic the faces Stiles had pulled earlier until Stiles was laughing. Then Stiles pulled Scott in and turned the camera.
They didn’t manage to check any of the photos since the bus pulled up to the stop closest to the Stilinski house and they had to race to get off.
But the next day, when Scott was flipping through his photos, he found one photo of the two of them that was in focus and had both of them in the frame. Stiles had his arm around Scott’s shoulder, which was just visible, and their faces were pressed up against each other, both grinning into the camera. Scott made sure he saved the photo, sent it to himself to save on his laptop then set it as his phone background. It hadn’t been such a bad night after all.
Summer before Junior Year
Scott lay on his bed in silence, thinking about the past few months, all the changes both good and bad. Then he thought back to his conversation with Stiles earlier that day when they were practicing lacrosse.
‘No lacrosse. No popularity, no girlfriend, nothing.’
‘Dude, you still got me.’
‘I had you before.’
‘Yeah, and you still got me. Okay? It’s a life fulfilled.’
Scott was surprised by how much the idea of no girlfrienddidn’t really hurt any more. When Allison had first ended things, following the absolute disaster that was the of the lacrosse final, he’d felt broken. Broken heart, broken spirit, just… broken. But now, nearly two months later, the hurt had started fade. Still there, but more manageable.
His summer had been spent much like most of his previous summers – just him and Stiles. When Stiles had reminded him earlier that he still had him, the thought had made Scott want to grin, wide. After being bitten by Peter, and then meeting Allison, Scott hadn’t spent as much time with Stiles as he usually would in the last few months of school. Between suddenly having a girlfriend, and trying to stay alive and getting caught up in werewolves and kanimas and everything, it had rarely just been the two of them.
Today it had felt like Stiles was reassuring him that he would always be there, and after everything, even with as much as he’d loved Allison, hearing that was the best thing he’d heard in a long time.
Scott was still lost in thought when he heard the front door open, and he propped himself up on his bed. His mum was working the late shift, so who – he heard the familiar heartbeat just before the footsteps started up the stairs and smiled. Of course, who else would just let themselves into his house? Although, he was surprised he hadn’t heard the jeep pull up.
‘Scotty! I come bearing supplies!’ Stiles’ called out, as if Scott wouldn’t have heard him by now.
Scott contemplated sitting up, but decided instead to simply roll over on his bed so he was on his stomach, facing the door. Stiles rounded the corner into his room, and Scott’s eyes widened when he took in the bags Stiles was carrying.
‘Uh… Stiles, what’s going on? You moving in or something?’ It looked like Stiles had a bag full of clothes, his PlayStation plus controllers, and two bags of food.
Stiles dumped everything just inside the door and bounded over to the bed, dropping down beside Scott with a thump that made Scott bounce.
‘Nope. Well, not technically. Dad’s on call all weekend, and I know Mama McCall is on late shifts so we’re having a boys weekend! You, me, junk food, video games and movies.’ Stiles’ eyes were sparkling, and Scott felt his excitement grow. They hadn’t had a bro night in longer than Scott could remember and the prospect of a whole weekend just the two of them hanging out like they used to – it was exactly what Scott needed.
He grinned, sitting up to face Stiles.
‘Tell me you have pop tarts.’ He said, trying, and failing, to sound serious. Stiles rolled his eyes.
‘Of course I have pop tarts, dude – who do you take me for, and amateur?’ Stiles shoved his shoulder good naturedly, then slipped off the bed to start fiddling with the PlayStation and Scott’s newly repaired tv.
Scott was content to just watch Stiles tinker.
Summer before Senior Year
The next summer, things were different – Allison was gone, Isaac and Derek had both left town, and Scott’s pack had expanded to include a werecoyote, a kitsune, Scott’s first ever bitten beta and a banshee they had thought was human. Stiles was dating Malia and still trying to help her integrate back into human society (Lydia was handling the school part after over hearing some of Stiles’ teaching methods). Scott was sort of dating Kira, even though she had been in New York for most of the summer.
They only had one more week until Summer was over and they began their final year of High School, and Scott could tell that Stiles was starting to get antsy about it, although he wasn’t entirely sure why.
So tonight, for the first time this summer, he’d made sure it was just gonna be the two of them – Liam was hanging out with Mason, and Lydia was taking Malia shopping for new school wardrobes or something.
So Scott let himself into the Stilinski house, nodding a greeting to the Sheriff who was sitting at the kitchen table looking over a case file.
‘Hey, Scott.’
‘Hi. How’s it going?’ He asked, and the Sheriff gave him a small smile.
‘Been a quiet summer, so can’t complain. The opposite, actually – it’s been refreshing, especially after the last year.’ Scott smiled in return – it was certainly easier for them with the Sheriff finally in the know, but he knew how hard it still was for his friend’s dad to have so many cases he couldn’t officially close because ‘it was a werewolf’ wasn’t really something he could put in an official report.
‘It’s been nice.’ Scott agreed.
‘Stiles is upstairs, doing… something.’ The Sheriff told him, and Scott nodded his thanks before bounding up the stairs, and entering Stiles room.
‘Hey Stiles.’ Stiles looked up from his laptop where it was sitting in his lap as he lounged on his bed.
‘Hey, Scott. What’s up?’ He asked, moving his laptop out of the way, closing the lid.
‘Not much. Thought we could hang, just us.’ Stiles’ eyes narrowed, and Scott cursed. Stiles was always able to read between the lines with him.
‘What is it? What happened? Is it Malia? Kira? Liam? Did he have like, a pre moon wolf out and run around naked again?’ He asked, and Scott shook his head.
‘No. Seriously, everyone’s fine, I swear. I just thought it would be nice for us to hang out just us, like it used to be.’ Scott explained, and Stiles relaxed minutely, though he was still staring at Scott like he was waiting for the but.
‘Ok.’
Scott moved into the room, kicking his shoes off and then sitting on the end of the bed, legs crossed, facing Stiles.
‘Ok. Fine. There is something I wanted to talk about – ’
‘I knew it! There is something wrong – ’
‘Stiles.’ Scott cut him off, using what Stiles had dubbed his alpha voice. Stiles always liked to claim it didn’t actually work on him since he wasn’t a werewolf, but nine times out of ten if Scott used it, Stiles would shut up.
This was one of those times.
‘It’s nothing bad, I just… You’ve been really focused on this whole post-senior year plan, like really focused, even for you, and I just – is everything ok? I mean, I totally understand wanting to keep us all together, I don’t like the idea of the pack just going their separate ways at the end of the year but, I don’t know, it seems like this is more than that.’
Stiles looked down at his hands, and Scott waited, watching him. Finally, he looked up at Scott and shrugged.
‘I asked my dad a few days ago who he still talks to, from his high school friends – do you know what he said?’ Scott shook his head at the question, but from Stiles posture and voice he could guess where this was going. ‘None, Scott. He doesn’t talk to a single one of his friends from high school.’
‘Is that what’s had you so wound up? You think that’s gonna be us?’ Scott asked, and Stiles shrugged again, then nodded once. Scott wanted to laugh, but bit it back, knowing it wouldn’t help.
‘Stiles – hey, look at me. That sucks for your dad, and yeah, maybe that happens to some people – but that is never going to be us, ok? First, we’re not all just friends, we’re pack, that means something.’ Stiles nodded, but he still didn’t look convinced. ‘And second? You and I? We’ve never just been friends – Stiles, you’ve always been more than just a friend, you’re the most important person in my life besides my mum. And after everything we’ve been through – Stiles, you stepped into gasoline while I held a lit flare to save my life or die with me. And I would do anythingto keep you safe too. So yeah, I’m really sorry for your dad and all those other people who lose their high school friends but we’re never gonna be those people.’
Stiles blinked at him, then started to smile, and Scott grinned in return.
‘You’re right, there’s not really any high school friendship like ours, is there?’ Stiles said, and Scott shook his head.
‘Nope. We’re one of a kind. Dude, you’re always gonna have me.’
‘I always have.’ Stiles responded, and Scott was suddenly reminded of that day last summer.
‘It’s a life fulfilled, right?’ He asked, hoping Stiles would remember. From the way Stiles’ eyes widened, then filled with happiness as he grinned, he too remembered that day.
‘Absolutely.’ He agreed, and they laughed. And Scott gave an internal sigh of relief that he’d figured out what was troubling his best friend, and had – hopefully – managed to fix it. At least for now.
Summer after High School
‘Dude, we did it.’ Stiles said, and Scott turned to look at him from the passenger side of the jeep. They were sitting in the jeep in the car park of the school two hours after their high school graduation ceremony.
Everyone else had left, the rest of the pack having not long taken off in groups to head to their favourite dinner for a celebratory dinner. Their parents had headed home with instructions to have fun but, under no circumstances, wake them up when they got home. They both had early shifts.
‘I know, I can’t believe we graduated.’ Scott agreed, and Stiles shook his head.
‘No, man – I mean yes, we did, but we did more than that. We survived.’ Stiles told him, turning in his seat to face Scott.
‘Stiles – did you mean it?’ Scott asked, and Stiles looked at him. ‘The night… the night they took you, the riders – you called me, but I didn’t know who you were…’
‘You remember that?’ Stiles asked, before he winced and ducked his head down.
‘Hey.’ Scott reached out, put a hand on Stiles’ shoulder, waited until Stiles looked up again. ‘Yeah, I remember. It came back when I saw you again for the first time at the hospital. Did you mean it?’
Stiles stared at him, and Scott just held his gaze, not moving. He just waited. After what felt like an eternity, Stiles nodded once.
‘I meant it.’
‘Scott? Hey, Scott, where are you? Where are you right now?’
‘Who’s this?’
‘Scott… no, please – please, Scott, you have to remember ok? They’re coming for me, but you have to remember, please – remember me. Remember… remember that I love you. I love you Scott, I never said it before but I do, I love you. I love you. Remember that.’
‘I love you too.’ Scott told him, and Stiles started to shake his head but Scott moved his hand from Stiles’ shoulder to cup his cheek, stilling the movement.
‘I do. When I realised what was missing from my life, that they’d taken you it was like this… I don’t know how to describe it, but I knew then. I need you in my life, always, not just because you’re my best friend but you’re the person I love more than anyone. I’m in love with you Stiles.’
Stiles’ eyes had filled with tears as he listened, and he blinked.
‘Are you sure?’ He asked softly, and Scott heard the fear in his voice.
‘Never been more sure.’ Scott told him, his voice steady and serious.
‘I’m in love with you too.’ Stiles admitted, and Scott smiled and then before Stiles could move Scott had leaned it, bringing his other hand to the back of Stiles’ head to pull him forward to meet him, pressing his lips to Stiles’.
Stiles squeaked in surprise, but quickly melted into the kiss, bringing his own hands up – one to mirror Scott’s and cup the back of Scott’s head, the other to wrap around Scott’s back, trying to pull him closer. Scott tilted his head slightly, and then deepened the kiss, pulling a groan from Stiles that Scott wanted to hear again and again.
When Stiles pulled back slightly, just to catch his breath, he grinned at Scott, and Scott mirrored the expression.
‘Well… that was new.’ Stiles said, and Scott laughed, rolling his eyes at the statement that was so Stiles.
‘But good?’ He checked when he stopped laughing, and Stiles bit his lip, and nodded.
‘Definitely good.’ Stiles started to lean in, and Scott moved as well but then Stiles’ phone went off, and he groaned. ‘I want to ignore it. I do. But that’s the ringtone Lydia set for herself and I fear that if I don’t answer she’s going to make me pay, somehow.’
Scott bit his lip to keep himself from laughing, and nodded his agreement. Lydia had certainly changed over the last couple of years, grown into herself and her abilities – but she still hated to be ignored. If she called, you answered. And if you didn’t, you were on your own, pack or no pack (Liam learned that lesson the hard way early in Scott and Stiles’ senior year).
‘Lydia? What’s up?’ Stiles asked, answering the phone just before it rang out.
‘Stiles? Where the hell are you guys? We’ve all been here for ages, and everyone’s getting hungry – and by everyone I mean the werecoyote, werewolf and teenage boys!’ She nearly shouted into the phone, and Stiles winced, staring at Scott with wide eyes. They’d both forgotten they were meant to be meeting the rest of the pack for dinner.
‘Uh, sorry, the jeep was acting up again, but I think it’s sorted now. We’ll be there in like, ten minutes. You know what, Scott and I always get the same thing there anyway, why don’t you just all go ahead and order, and order ours too? That’ll keep the others happy.’ Scott grinned at him – they were meeting at their favourite diner, and he and Stiles had been ordering the same thing for years.
Scott listened as Stiles rattled off their orders from memory, then after swearing to Lydia they were getting on the road right this minute, he hung up.
‘Oops?’ Stiles said, grinning at Scott.
‘Oops.’ Scott agreed, then, Lydia and her threats be damned, he leaned back across the centre console to kiss Stiles once again.
When he pulled back, Stiles looked a little dazed before shaking his head as if to clear it. Scott settled back into his seat with a smile, watching as Stiles turned the key in the ignition, letting out a little prayer (thank you jeep gods!) when it started with no fuss.
Stiles pulled out of the spot and drove out of the car park, away from the school. When he reached the main road, he reached out and grabbed hold of Scott’s hand, holding it as he drove. Scott let his head roll to the side, smiling at Stiles, content to watch him drive them to meet their friends – their pack.
It was the first night of their summer vacation – the first one after finishing high school, their last before college and the demands of adulthood hit. And if this was any indication, this was going to be the best summer yet. They had other friends now, they had their pack and allies. And, like all those summers before, they had each other.
Scott gave Stiles’ hand a small squeeze, and Stiles looked over quickly, smiling at him.
He remembered their conversation from last summer, and the one before. This wasn’t just a life fulfilled. This was everything.
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the-lincyclopedia · 3 years
Text
I saw a post this morning about how high school AUs are unbearable after you finish high school, but! Full IB AU where the OG6 are all seniors at the same time! I mean, the CHAOS of TOK. Shitty for sure makes a mockery of the class, which stresses Ransom out because he's convinced he needs to get at least a 40 on the 45-point scale to get into an Ivy (which is very false because US universities don't care much about IB at all, but high schoolers have warped ideas of what colleges want). This leaves Jack to mediate between Shitty and Ransom, who are his two best friends, so Jack is stressed both academically and socially. Bitty mostly bakes and tweets when he should be studying and low-key wishes he were doing AP because then at least there wouldn't be IAs. Lardo and Holster bond over wishing projects could be more creative rather than all written; Lardo is in IB art (by herself? It's a tiny class for sure), and Holster is in IB music. Jack and Bitty have HL History together and last year that was a disaster but this year they're maybe getting along, which is weird. (Help, I think I have headcanons for everyone's HLs.) Jack and Lardo plan things to help everyone get their CAS hours done. Shitty writes his EE on feminism.
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silkling · 3 years
Note
Silkling, I really love your writing. Could you please write a TFA fic of Isaac and Bulkhead bonding over growing up on farms?
You know, I always forget Bulkhead grew up on a farm. But I would be thrilled to! I hope it’s to your satisfaction!
———————————————————————————————————
Bulkhead was painting again. That in and of itself wasn’t something new. He painted a lot. What made this time different was that he was alone at the base. Sari had taken the others to something she’d called a “theme park”. He didn’t understand exactly what a park had to have to be called a theme park, but she’d told me it usually involved lots of things called “rides” and lots of games. He also didn’t understand how a ride could be fun, but then again he didn’t know what a ride was. He had a feeling that the way Sari used it, these “rides” weren’t the kind of ride that was defined by the dictionary definition of the word. She had also, helpfully, said that theme parks were always popular and the funnest part of the “rides” was the screaming. He had opted out at that point, being more confused by what exactly that weird park entailed. So, here he was. At the base, alone and painting with peace and quiet.
He rather liked it, actually. He knew Bumblebee didn’t understand, but it was moments like this Bulkhead found himself really getting Prowl. Stillness and quiet could be nice, sometimes. He was intending to do a big project today, wanting to take advantage of the rare peace to be found in their make-shift home. The others had said they’d be gone all day. He wasn’t expecting them back till close to sunset.
So when he heard a voice from the front of the base, he was rather startled. Thankfully, he didn’t ruin his painting as he jerked, and he sighed in relief before dropping the brush in the water pot. Then he turned to the voice, head tilting as it called out again. Oh, wait. He knew that voice! The large bot lumbered towards the unexpected guest, and as soon as the smaller form came into view his engine let out a soft churr of greeting.
“Hey, Professor Sumdac.” he said contentedly. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”
The human had turned at the sound of approaching pedes, his gaze locking on the Autobot at the soft rumble of his engine. He blinked rapidly, not having expected the largest of their alien guests to be the one to greet him. He would have thought it would be Optimus, or perhaps Bumblebee. Still, it wouldn’t do to be rude. He may have had more humble beginnings than most of his wealth, but his mother had taught him manners and he intended to use them. Besides, Bulkhead had been polite enough to come out and greet him, even though he was technically intruding on the gentle giant’s own home.
“Good afternoon, Bulkhead. It is very nice to see you. I apologize for the intrusion, but I was looking for Sari. You wouldn’t happen to know where she is, would you?” he asked hopefully.
Bulkhead only blinked a few times, looking a little surprised. “She took the others to something she called a theme park. I stayed behind. Screaming for fun doesn’t really…sound good. I’m surprised she got Ratchet to go.” he paused. “Actually, that may be because I’m pretty sure she has blackmail on him.” he added, as if to himself. Then he seemed to remember the point of the question, and he frowned at the older human. “She didn’t tell you?”
“That she’s going to a theme park or that she’s blackmailing senior alien robots?” Isaac said dryly. “She told me neither of those things.”
Bulkhead smiled sheepishly. “Sorry, Professor.”
“Ah, don’t worry about it. I’m certain she would have found a way to the theme park either way. I do wish she would stop skipping her lessons, though.”
Bulkhead blinked. “I suppose. You’re very patient with her. On Cybertron, if a youngling consistently misbehaves than their creators wouldn’t be as patient.” he said offhandedly.
Isaac blinked. “Youngling? Is that your word for a child?” he asked. Then the second part of the statement caught up. “Ah, pardon me for asking, but what are “creators”? I was under the impression you are living robotic organisms, not built by someone else.”
Bulkhead hummed. “Yeah, youngling! I’m one, technically. Though I’m closer to being considered a fully grown mech than Bumblebee. I’d be considered the equivalent of a 16 year old human?” he said, running the calculations in his head. “Yeah, somewhere in that range. Bee is the equivalent of a 13 or 14 year old.” He was pretty good with math. His numbers were mostly right, or at least close enough for his point to be understood.
Isaac was staring. “You and Bumblebee…are not yet adults?” he seemed stunned.
“Nope!” Bulkhead was cheerful. “Bossbot and Ratchet are. Prowl is too, I think? He’s really private but I’m pretty sure he is. He’s older than Bossbot is, anyway.” he smiled, humming to himself. “I actually think Prime is only just considered a proper mech? Like, uh….between 19 and 21 in humans terms?” he tapped his chin with a finger, only just then noticing the open mouthed gape the professor was sending him. The large bot squirmed, uncomfortable. “Professor?”
Isaac snapped his mouth shut with a audible click, then shook his head. “You and Bumblebee-“ he cut himself off, shaking his head again before he kept speaking. “You are not yet adult on your world?” he repeated, still internally flailing over that revelation.
Bulkhead blinked. “Well, no.” he said, tilting his head. “Why?”
“Because if you’re still so young you shouldn’t have been allowed off the planet!” Isaac answered, his hands flapping with his distress.
The Autobot frowned. “Well, I’m close enough to being an adult that I’m considered capable of any type of non-combatant work. When I flunked out of the Academy that left space bridge repairs.” he said. “My creators were fine with it cause they were sure I’d be staying in Autobot space territory, and since they know how well I know space bridges they weren’t actually worried about me being in danger.”
“What about Bumblebee? You said he’s even younger than you!”
“Ah….” Bulkhead hunched his shoulders. “Bee, um. He doesn’t have creators. He wasn’t cold-forged, which means he wasn’t just placed in a protoform after Vector Sigma spat out his spark, but he was a abandoned at a Youth Center as a sparkling. A, uh, a baby.” Bulkhead explained awkwardly. He squired at the probing stare. “Please don’t make me explain Cybertronian reproduction differences. Ask Ratchet.” he said desperately. He did not want to have that discussion.
Isaac sighed. “Oh, very well.” he agreed. He didn’t want to make Bulkhead uncomfortable, after all. “So, creators…I gather they are the equivalent of human parents?” he tilted his head. “Would you mind telling me about yours?”
Bulkhead perked up. “Yeah!” he confirmed. “My creators were real proud when I joined the Academy. I’m lucky they weren’t disappointed that I flunked out. They understood.” his gaze went soft and fond. “I do miss them. I know they were a little sad I didn’t want to continue on with the family business like my older brother, but…” he shook his head. “Breakdown didn’t mind staying at the farm. I always wanted more.” he sighed. “Roadbuster and Beachcomber, my creators, were just happy I was getting the chance to do something I wanted.”
Isaac stilled. “Farm?”
“An energon farm!” Bulkhead supplied cheerily. “The farm was built on top of a really big underground energon spring. Our job was to extract it, purify it, then refine it into different grades and types of energon to be shipped out to the rest of Cybertron.” He shot a fond look around the building. “This place reminds me of the energon refinery on the farm, actually.”
Isaac blinked. “You grew up on a farm.” It was a statement.
Bulkhead frowned. “Didn’t I just say that?”
Isaac smiled. “I grew up on a farm as well, Bulkhead.”
The Autobot’s eyes quite literally lit up at that little tidbit, and he shot a glance at the small lounge area they’d put together. “Sit?” he asked hopefully. “I’d like to know about earth farms.”
Isaac nodded, leading the way and taking a seat on the himself couch while Bulkhead sat himself on one of the odd tire seats. “It was a dairy farm, primarily.” Isaac smiled. “My family raised cows for their milk and sold it to stores and at farmer’s markets.” he sounded fond as he reminisced. “We also made our own cheeses. I still have the recipes!”
Bulkhead tilted his head. “What happened?”
“I…” a pause. “I was always good with machines. I suppose that I, like you, wanted more. So I went to school for robotics and then, well…” he put out his arms. “Here I am.”
Bulkhead hummed. “…I miss the farm sometimes. Even if it was annoying to have to get up so early.”
“Ah, yes. Early mornings.” The human groaned. “I remember those. I despised them. Especially when I had cleaning duty for my morning chores.”
Bulkhead made a look it disgust. “Tell me about it. Cleaning out the energon purifiers and refiners was the worst job on the farm, but I always got stuck with it cause I was the youngest.”
Isaac hummed. “I remember the smell, even years later.”
“I remember the slime.”
He paused, unsure if he wanted to know. “…slime?”
Bulkhead nodded. “Yeah, see, when energon is being refined and when it’s being purified, the process involves removing unwanted contaminates or components at a base level.” he tilted his head. “The finished product comes out looking fine, but then it leaves a very thick, sticky slime on the insides of the machines that has to be cleaned out.” He grimaced. “I really preferred the work of extracting the raw stuff from the spring. It was really hard and labor intensive but at least it wasn’t slime.”
Isaac found himself grinning. “I was much the same with the cows. I detested mucking out the barn, so much so that I would prefer to do twice my share of the milking. That was dull work, but at least I could plan out blueprints for my projects in my head while I worked.”
Bulkhead found himself humming softly. “I liked the farm. I would have been happy there, I think. But…”
“It wasn’t what you wanted to do with your life.”
He grinned. “Yeah.” he paused. “I do miss the songs, though. And my brother, though Breakdown is probably annoyed that I missed so many calls. I miss my creators too.” he frowned. “I hope they don’t think I’ve offlined. I was in stasis for a while.”
Isaac softened, sighing and feeling something fond well up in his chest. “I’m sure they held out hope. Speaking as a parent…well, I don’t think I’d ever stop hoping if Sari were to go missing.”
Bulkhead glanced up, then smiled faintly. “Thanks, Professor.”
“You mentioned something about songs?” he asked with a smile in return, hoping to shift to topic in order to cheer up the green bot.
“Yeah!” Bulkhead brightened. “My creators had old songs that were passed down from their creators, and that they taught us. Whenever we were all working together we’d sing!” he seemed fond as he recalled the memories. “It was always really nice. When we were singing, I almost wouldn’t mind cleaning duty.” he shuddered. “Almost.”
Isaac barked a laugh. “I see! My family never had any songs, but we had recipes we shared and cooked together. We would all make dinner together after a hard day’s work. Those were my favorite moments of the day.” he sighed.
“Your parents must be proud of how far you’ve come.” Bulkhead mused.
Isaac smiled sadly. “They’re dead, Bulkhead.”
“Oh…” he reset his vocalizer. “I’m sorry.”
The human sighed. “It is alright. I have had time to mourn and grieve. And you are right. They were very proud. My father was proud even when I left the farm. He was happy to see me trying to pursue a better life. My mother was disappointed that I would not carry on the family legacy.” he sighed and tilted his head up. “But she did come to terms with it. In the end, she was happy for me and proud of all I’d accomplished.” He glanced at the Autobot, considering. “I own the farm now, though I no longer work there and I have far fewer cows. One of my cousins stays there when I am not to take care of the few cows there are, and I return with Sari during holidays sometimes.” he shot Bulkhead a warm grin. “In fact, I was going to bring her there again for the upcoming Fourth of July. Perhaps…you would like to come as well? I can show you life on a human farm in person.” he offered.
Bulkhead almost seemed to vibrate with glee at the prospect. “I’d like that a lot, Professor! And hey, if you’re ever on Cybertron, I’ll show you may farm!” he said brightly.
Isaac laughed, loud and free. He doubted that he’d ever see the alien planet, but the sentiment was still very nice. “I’d like that very much, Bulkhead. Thank you.”
Just then, he heard the sound of approaching engines, and when he looked towards the door he realized he could see the sun setting. Goodness, he and Bulkhead had been talking for hours. As the other bots stopped and transformed, Sari hopped out of Bumblebee before he did so and froze when she saw her father.
“Uh, hiiiiii, dad!” she squeaked.
Isaac sighed. “Sari, you should have told me where you were going! I was worried about you!” he scolded. “Come, we’re returning home. It’s getting late and I have the feeling you haven’t had proper food all day.” he said.
“But dad-!”
“No buts! The car is outside. Go, please.”
She groaned and grumbled, but after a quick goodbye to the others she obeyed.
Isaac turned to Bulkhead, smiling. “Thank you for taking the time to talk to me, Bulkhead. I enjoyed it.”
Bulkhead, for his part, merely beamed in response. “You’re welcome! I had a lot of fun! It was great to learn more about you, Professor Sumdac!”
Isaac smiled. “Please, Bulkhead. You can call me Isaac.” he said warmly.
The Autobot blinked a few times, and before smiling even more brightly. “Right. Isaac.”
Isaac grinned in response. The young bot’s joy was positively infectious. “I would enjoy talking further another time, Bulkhead. For now, I must take my leave. Goodnight!” he said, before walking out the door.
Bulkhead waved. “Goodnight, Isaac!” he called.
When the sounds of the human car had faded into nothing, Bulkhead turned to find everyone else staring at him. He smiled at his teammates, standing from his seat. “Hey guys! Did you have a good day?” he asked. Then he realized he had forgotten his painting. “Awe, scrap. You can tell me about it later! I have to go!” And then he was gone, hurrying to see if his art couldn’t be saved.
Even if it couldn’t, he didn’t mind. He’d gained a new friend today, and that was worth a thousand paintings in his optics.
Back in the main room, Bumblee could only stare after his friend. “Uhhh…what was that all about?”
———————————————————————————————————
And there it is! I hope you liked it! I gave Bulkhead a family because I wanted to, and yes his big brother is Breakdown. That means his brother-in-law is Knock Out. Ratchet is horrified when he learns this. Roadbuster and Beachcomber are very worried for their youngest. They were told he’s dead but like Isaac said, a parent never stops hoping. The team is currently very confused about what they just witnessed.
Also, poor Ratchet. Sari will never let go of her blackmail on him. How does a child get blackmail on a millions-of-years-old giant alien robot? It’s Sari. You could tell me she convinced Megatron to agree to peace purely by annoying him and I’d believe you. I love her. :D Anyway.
Until next time, folks!
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ironmariposa · 3 years
Text
(The things I did) Just so I could call you mine
Chapter 3/4
Also found on Ao3
Notes: A huge thank you to @writing-as-tracey for giving me key words to use for Heather & Rays project and for all their encouragement for this story!! Keeps my motivation going. If you haven’t yet you should definitely check out their ff!
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“The Senior baseball tournament.”
“Oh.” Heather laughs holding up her hands, “There’s no way you want me on the team.”
“Not a choice, Hill. Everyone has to play.”
Heather shakes her head, “Trust me, Ray, you do not want me.”
His eyes flash and she swallows because damn why does she keep slipping up like that. Making off the wall comments that have double meanings.
“I mean on the team. You don’t want me on the team. I’m horrible at organized sports.”
He leans towards her, “You can’t be that bad. Come on, it’ll be fun. Just. Go out to Andy’s and practice in the batting cages.”
Andy’s is the local putt putt place that is mostly a piece of shit but pretty much the only fun outing that’s close by. Her, Bishop, and Natalie spent most of their middle school years there. Playing putt-putt but for the one time. One time Natalie was crushing on a baseball player and forced the three of them to go to the batting cages. It was an absolute disaster.
“Lets just.” Heather sighs, “get back to work. I only have another hour before I have to pick up my sister.”
Ray drops his chair back to four legs and picks up the book she slides across the table to him. “Just think about it.”
She studies him as his eyes flicker through the book. They’ve had multiple meetings together at the library and sometimes at school. He’s given her rides home, teases with her sister and just recently started calling out to her in the hallways. The first few times she jumped, because in the past it meant he was about to mock her or Bishop.
He’s different and as the due date for their project approaches she finds herself almost sad. Because after they’re done she won’t have a reason to hang out with him. And she finds she actually likes hanging out with Ray Hall.
“Are you serious?” Heather stares at her friend, her best friend, in complete shock. The news she just dropped on them as they sat on the side of main street was shocking. To have known someone for so long and not see such a bombshell coming…. Heather was lost for words.
Bishop just shakes his head, “You know what, I'm not even that surprised.”
Heather looks at him then back at Nat, “Well I am. You’ve always said it’s a stupid game for idiots to play.”
“Nooo.” Nat says with a tilt of her head, “You've always said that. I just agreed.”
Bishop points his drink at Heather, “She’s got you there.”
“I mean…” Heather shakes her head and picks up her drink. Hearing that Natalie plans on playing the Senior game after two Seniors died last year playing it, is just terrifying. She never thought she would have to watch someone she cared about go through it. Although, the closer she grew to Ray, she knew in the back of her mind she would have to watch him. There was no way he wouldn’t play, especially since his brother won just a few years ago.
Nat nudges her with her arm, “You’re not mad, are you?”
“No. Not mad.” Heather meets her friend's dark brown eyes and cringes, “Just …worried.”
Nat laughs, “It’ll be fine.”
“Yeah. I’m sure that’s exactly what Jimmy and Abby thought too.” Bishop says with a bit of a bite to his voice. Both girls look at him with wide eyes and he makes a face, “Too dark?”
“Yeah.”
“Just a bit dude.”
They all laugh and if it’s a little strained, well, no one points it out.
Heather rushes into their established room in the library with an apology on her lips. “Sorry, my boss made me stay later because he wanted to get high with his girlfriend.” She slams herself in a chair and begins to unload her bag.
“Sounds like a douche.”
Heather grunts, “He one hundred percent is a douche.” She slams one book then another down on the table before pulling out her notebook and flipping it open, “But he pays me. Most of the time. So I have to put up with him.”
Ray closes the book he was reading and leans forward, “What do you mean he only pays you most of the time?”
Heather shrugs, “Doesn’t matter. So did you figure out which chapters we should focus on because I was thinking …” Heather stops her ramble as Ray's hands fall on top of her notebook, covering it completely.
“Heather, it’s illegal for them not to pay you.”
Heather sighs, “Well considering there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it.”
“You could quit.”
She laughs harshly at that, “You sound just like Nat and Bishop.” He makes a face at the comparison, “I can’t quit. I need the money. The portion my mom doesn’t take for living in her house, I’m saving for college.” She looks up at him with a desperation for him to understand because her friends never could. They both come from families that love and support them. Families that can afford to send them to college. Families that lift them up instead of dragging them down so deep, it feels like she will never be able to dig herself out no matter how hard she tries
But if anyone could get it, it would be him, “I have to get out of this town.” She says in a quiet voice and there it is. His eyes say it all, complete understanding.
She feels relieved at having someone understand her so completely. She feels like she can actually breath.
He nods after a moment and pulls his arms back, “I was thinking chapters ten and eleven and then the last few chapters.”
Heather nods as she flips through her notebook to those chapters.
“Hey.” Ray steps up to her locker and she glances quickly at him before focusing back on the contents of her locker. She can still see him out of her peripheral as he leans up against her locker door, grinning, “We’re taking the boat out tomorrow afternoon, want to come?”
Heather nudges him with her arm and grabs her locker door to shut it, “Did you finish your character analysis and also who’s we, because I have no interest hanging out with a drug dealer and a pediphile.” She starts to walk to class and he follows. Moving around her to walk backwards so he can face her. And it works for him because no one wants to be the one he trips over so everyone makes a path for them.
Ray chuckles, “I did finish it.” He waves the paper at her and she takes it, her eyes skimming over his handwriting, “And Adam’s not a pediphile.”
“Did he not date that freshman for a few months?” She asks as she tucks the paper in her notebook.
“Well sure but he was still seventeen at the time.”
Heather shakes her head at him silently. He laughs, his dimple flashing and her eyes once again lingering there. He notices. Of course he does, his eyes say it all.
“It’s not just them. Sarah will be there and probably Ruby Anne.” Ray stops causing her to stop or run into his chest. And she kind of wants that. At school he manages to keep his shirts buttoned but any other time she sees him or spends time with him, he usually has his bare chest on full display. And she’s been getting the urge to touch it more and more.
“Come on. It’ll be fun.” He urges.
“Okay.” She finally agrees. Ray shouts loudly and steps around her to head off to his class. He continues celebrating loudly as he leaves her and she shakes her head in embarrassment. Glancing around she finds no one is paying them much attention besides a curious look or two. Thankfully neither of her friends have class down this hallway.
She actually has that Saturday off but she tells her mom she’s working. She can’t use that excuse on her friends because they’ll expect her to meet them on her break so she tells them she has to watch Lily and work on homework. They don’t question her because it happens often enough. She feels bad for lying to them. They both mean well but they’ve been making little comments here and there about how much time she’s been spending with Ray.
She approaches the dock with trepidation. She can see Adam and Sarah already on the boat. Ray is messing with a fishing pole off to the side. He looks good in low riding swimming trunks and a sleeveless button up. Of course it’s unbuttoned. Adam gives a soft whistle and nods to her when Ray glances at him. Ray turns to her, the smile on his face wide and genuine. He pushes his sunglasses on top of his head and her heart pounds at the look on his face.
“You came.” And he sounds genuinely surprised.
“I said I would.” She smiles back at him and they stand there for a long moment.
Tyler pushes past them, “Let's go bitches.”
Ruby Anne follows behind him and smiles apologetically at Heather. Her eyes find Rays again and he nods his head to the boat.
They’re last on the boat after Ray unties it from the dock and other than the captain's chair there’s nowhere for Heather to sit. Ray fixes that by pulling her onto his leg once he sits to drive the boat. She looks over his shoulder at him.
“Is this really necessary?”
He winks at her, keeping his eyes on the water but for that small glance, “Unless you prefer the floor?”
Heather glances over her shoulder. Sarah smiles at her as she lounges back in her seat, a can of beer already open in her hand. Tyler and Adam are passing a joint back and forth. Ruby Anne is sunbathing in her seat.
They're going pretty fast and as Ray turns the boat around a corner she falls more into his lap. She tries to move back to just perching on his knee but he maneuvers his arms around her waist to steer. After a moment of hesitation, Heather relaxes against his bare chest, her head resting just below his chin. He nudges her slightly with his nose and she glances up at him.
“Are you smelling me?”
He laughs out loud and she smiles at how much it thrills her to make him laugh. He presses his nose against her hair again and takes an exaggerated deep breath.
“Smells like peppermint.”
She doesn’t respond. Just enjoys being in his arms, letting herself relax for once where it concerns Ray. No one here is going to tell her it’s wrong or how horrible he is. Or how stupid she’s being. She can just enjoy the moment.
And she does. It takes them another twenty minutes before they get to where they’re going. Ray tells her it’s his favorite fishing spot. The others jump out and make their way to a floating dock where they continue their activities of sunbathing, smoking and drinking. Ray waves them off when they ask if they’re coming.
They spend the entire day out there on the water, not returning until twilight. Heather knows she’ll be red from playing in the water with Ray, to sunbathing on the dock with Sarah and Ruby Anne. She even had a semi deep conversation with Tyler about how honeybees play an important part in their ecosystem and how without them we wouldn’t have coffee or avocados or even medications. Heather's mind is blown with how much knowledge Tyler seems to have on this one subject but Ruby Anne informs her that when he’s high, Tyler likes to watch nature documentaries. They all laugh so hard at him, he storms off a huff.
Ray walks her to her car. The others already went on their way as she helped him unload the boat.
“Thanks for…” she turns and is left speechless as he his eyes meet hers. It’s dark out, hard to see much but his eyes are filled with want. For her. He takes one step, then another, crowding her smaller body back against the truck. And she thinks this is it. This is when he’s going to kiss her. And she was going to let him.
She whispers his name as her legs fall open, giving him room to press against her. She feels the hardness of him all over. He brings his hands up but instead of touching her like she expects. Like she wants, he brackets her head between them as he presses them against his truck. His head tilts down and she lets out a long breath as he drags his nose up her neck and to her ear. His breath is hot as he whispers in her ear, “You’re so far from cute, Heather Nill. I could absolutely devour you with how fuckin sexy you’ve looked all day. I’ve been hard since the moment you appeared on my dock.” And he proves this by grinding himself in the warm space between her legs. Heather's head falls back against the truck with a groan. She curls her hands with want. She wants to fill them with him. To touch him all over, starting with a handful of his hair and ending with a handful of his ….
Ray's nose is back to dragging over her neck and he nips at her pulse causing her to jump. She reaches for him, her hands spreading over his bare back as she pulls him in. He lifts his head, his lips a breath from hers.
Her phone goes off and it’s obnoxious enough that it pulls them both out of their lust haze. Ray pulls his body away from her as she reaches in her pocket to pull it out. It’s her neighbor and she knows she has to answer. It’s never good when she calls.
Glancing at Ray she flashes her phone at him, “I have to…” he just nods and she steps away from him as she presses the accept button.
As she suspected, Bo and her mom are at it again and Lily needs her. She quickly explains to Ray who accepts it with more understanding than she expects. Her friends aren’t usually so understanding but then again they have perfect families that never have drama. Ray on the other hand…
Ray sends her off with a tuck of hair behind her ear and a soft smile she’s never seen him give another. Her thoughts are on getting to her sister but her body is still aflame with desire as she speeds to the trailer park. And after she gets Lily settled in bed, the house now quiet with Bo gone and her mom passed out, Heather lies in her bed thinking of that moment out by his truck and how she knows without a doubt she would have let Ray take her to his bed if they hadn’t been interrupted. And she wonders if that’s a good thing or not.
Heather is waiting for Bishop to finish switching books in his backpack at his locker when Natalie runs up to them and grabs Heather's arm, squeezing tightly.
“Ow Nat.” Heather attempts to pull her arm from her friend's grip but the taller girl refuses to let go.
“You went on a date with Ray Hall?” Natalie practically shouts.
Heather shushes her as she glances around. Bishop looks up from his backpack, frozen. They stare at one another for a long moment before he says one word through gritted teeth, “Well?”
“I…”
Bishop slams the door to his locker so loudly, if people weren’t looking at them before, they sure were now. Natalie seems to notice this as well and pulls them into a dark empty classroom, closing the door behind them.
“Ruby Anne is going around saying you and Ray hooked up this weekend.”
“We didn’t hook up.”
“That you spent the day with them out on his boat. But that couldn’t be true, right? Because you told us,” Natalie points between her and Bishop, “That you couldn’t hang out because you were watching your sister all day.”
Heather presses the heels of her hands to her eyes and then runs them through her hair, “Okay. I lied.”
“You lied?” Bishop says.
Heather avoids meeting his eyes, instead choosing to look over his shoulder into the dark corner of the classroom, “Look, I just didn’t want you guys to give me shit about hanging out with Ray.”
“We don’t give you shit.” Natalie tries to protest.
“You actually do. Even when it’s just to work on the project, you give me shit. I’m so..” Heather takes a deep breath and lets it out, “I’m so sick of feeling guilty for wanting to spend time with someone.”
“Not just someone.” Bishop says through clenched teeth, “But Ray Hall.”
Heather tilts her head back as she breathes in deeply through her nose. Here it is.
“Ray Fucking Hall.”
“Okay, Bishop. I get it. You hate him.” She runs her hands through her hair again but says the next words without hesitation, “But I don’t.”
Bishop blanches at her words and she looks at Natalie who wrinkles her nose at her.
“Heather, you know what he is. You know.” Bishop says with so much heat. Heather just stares down at her feet as Bishop continues his rant. She knows he’s been building this up ever since she was partnered with Ray. She thinks maybe if she lets him have his say then he’ll just back off. Because between him and Ray and everyone else she feels so confused. “All he is and all he’ll ever be is a Meth Row idiot, heading down the same path as his father and brother. You have to see that. You have to know that after all these years.”
“Okay Bishop, that’s enough.” Natalie finally steps in. His eyes flash to her then back to Heather. Without another word he turns on his heel and storms away.
“He’s an idiot.” Natalie says.
“He is.” She agrees.
Natalie wraps her arm around Heather and guides her back out of the classroom, “But you know it’s because he’s in love with you.”
Heather tilts her head back with a groan, “He is not in love with me, Nat.”
Natalie just gives her a look. The look, “If you say so girl.”
After the confrontation, Heather keeps to herself. She doesn’t see either of her friends the rest of the day. She attempts to smile at Ray in class but he just turns in his seat to talk to Adam. She’s too distracted to think anything of it and slides into her seat silently. It’s the week before Spring Break which means their presentations are all week. Their day to present is on Thursday and so Heather sits through the week watching the other presentations. Bishop isn’t talking to her at all and Nat is being distant. She spends her days after school working and keeping Lily away from their trailer as much as possible. The fallouts between her mom and Bo usually last longer than a day or two and it’s always safer to keep their distance.
But then Thursday comes and Ray is nowhere to be seen. She sits in class as the bell rings and picks at her nails. Mrs. Plaza calls her up to the front, “It looks like your partner isn’t going to show. Are you comfortable doing the presentation on your own?”
“I am. But he’ll show.”
Mrs. Plaza looks at her with sympathy, “I’ll put you and Ray last on the list.” She reaches out a hand and places it on Heathers, a comforting touch, “But, Honey, I wouldn’t count on him showing up.”
Heather smiles, “He’ll be here.” And though she sounds confident, with each minute that ticks by, her confidence falters.
Finally, there’s no time left and it’s their turn to present.
He doesn’t show.
12 notes · View notes
vennilavee · 4 years
Text
to build a home - ch 2
a girl in a bar
attack on titan masterlist
ch 1 - beyond the drapes
Pairing: levi x reader (attack on titan)
Summary: a modern au where you and levi both work for the Survey Corps, a non-profit organization with a mission to help the youth of the Underground District.
Warnings: cursing, lots of suggestive themes, alcohol
Word Count: 5528
A/N: idk i love him. enjoy!!
***
“Okay, so everything was submitted yesterday,” You say, reading down your list of updates, “We’re just pending approval on those three grants, those four project plans, and those two proposals. Everything’s taken care of.”
“Yeah, Erwin, don’t you know? You’ve got a team of rockstars, I mean, what would you do without us,” Hange says, “This is the most fun I’ve had in a long time!”
“Your definition of fun needs to be revisited,” Levi mutters under his breath but he still earns a glare from Hange.
“As if you would know fun if it bit you in the ass, shorty-”
“And you would?”
Erwin sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose, “Alright, it sounds like we’re ahead of schedule. Thank you for all of your hard work this month, and be sure to relay that message to your teams as well.”
“Hey Erwin,” You say, sickly sweet. It’s the same tone you use when you speak to your rich donors. And Levi already knows what you’re about to ask before you ask it.
“We’ve been working so hard the last month,” You say with a smile, “Let’s have a happy hour this week? Or a night out? We’ve all been working overtime, including you. You deserve a relaxing night…”
Levi rolls his eyes. Of course Erwin would say yes- when has he ever said no to a night of drinking disguised as team bonding?
“Yeah, okay. Are the rest of you okay with it?” Erwin asks, looking at Hange and Levi.
“As long as you’re footing the bill,” Hange winks at Erwin.
“A night at a crowded bar with the interns? Can’t think of anything better,” Levi deadpans and you glare at him.
“They deserve the night, too! They sure have been workin’ more than your sorry ass. Haven’t seen you stay late even once in the last week!”
“Haven’t seen me stay late- we literally leave together. In the same car. Are you feeling okay today? Something crawl into your head and die there?”
“Shut up, Levi,” You grumble, but don’t bother to conceal your laugh.
“Levi, why don’t you go and tell the new hires that we’re having a get together on Friday? Does the Stallion work?” Erwin says with a teasing grin and you swear smoke is coming out of Levi’s ears.
But he agrees anyway, because that’s what he does.
***
“Why does he want me to tell them?” Levi grumbles, “They like you better anyway, as they should.”
“They like you just fine, Levi,” You say, touching his arm gently before letting your hand fall to your side, “C’mon, I’ll come with you. I’m sure they’ll be excited to unwind.”
Levi looks on ahead as you both continue down the hallway but he returns your touch with a small graze of his fingers against your elbow. You walk in silence with your notebook in one arm  as you head to the common area, where most of the new hires are.
“Oi,” Levi calls and heads turn towards him as abrupt silence falls amongst them, “The Stallion on Friday. Be there, or don’t.”
“Well when you put it that way, they’ll definitely want to come,” You mutter, “What Levi means to say is that Erwin is organizing a night out at the Stallion to celebrate the end of a very long month. We know how hard all of you have been working and want to show you our appreciation. You can let either Levi or I know if you’d like to come.”
All of them start tittering amongst themselves, the air in the room changing. They’re clearly excited for a night out to relax and you can see smiles of excitement on their faces already. You wonder what they were discussing so intensely before Levi had announced your arrival.
“And everything’s on us, so don’t worry about that,” You add as an afterthought. Levi sends them a look to let them know not to take advantage of that. A collective gasp echoes through the room.
“Wow-”
“Really?”
“I can’t believe it!”
“We hope to see you all on Friday,” You give them a warm smile before letting them return to their devices and walking away from them with Levi.
“Look at how much they appreciate being appreciated,” You murmur, “I know most of our work is done for the Underground kids, but I think we do good work here, too.”
Levi hums, taking your hand in his and rubbing your thumb before letting go.
“I knew you noticed it, too,” You smile at him.
“I did no such thing,” Levi says.
You shake your head fondly before you stop at your office to finish off the remainder of your afternoon. 
“Busy rest of the day today?” Levi asks, eyeing your shoulder and the newly installed standing desk.  Subconsciously touching your shoulder, you shake your head.
“No, just meeting with Eren, Mikasa and Armin later today. They wanted to discuss some of the youth sports programs and how we can increase engagement,” You reply, “Shoulder’s okay, Levi. I promise.”
He narrows his eyes at you for a moment and nods, heading back to his own office to finish up some paperwork. Maybe he can finish quickly and take you home early today. Levi is lost in his own thoughts, but not so lost that he misses the two pairs of eyes watching him leave your office.
***
“I’m telling you, they’re definitely together. Something is up there,” Jean insists in a harsh whisper, “I mean have you heard the way she talks about him?”
“She talks about everyone like that, idiot,” Eren hisses, glaring at him, “She doesn’t even talk about Captain that much to begin with!”
“I saw him leave her office just now!” Armin blurts out with a gasp and everyone goes quiet.
“So? They’re our superiors, it’s not weird for them to be meeting with each other,” Eren replies.
“Have you ever heard anyone other than her call the Captain affectionate?” 
“Well, no, but… Maybe she was just saying that!” Sasha protests.
“Nobody would just say that,” Jean scoffs, “Do you hear Hange say that? Or Erwin?”
Eren doesn’t have an answer for that.
“Maybe they’re keeping it under wraps because Erwin forbids office relationships,” Armin says in a hushed whisper and Jean nods in agreement.
“Maybe they’re trying to keep it a secret. We should stay out of it,” Mikasa chimes in.
“If they’re trying to keep it a secret, they’re doing a pretty shitty job about it,” Jean mutters.
“And I’m sure they’re more careful around Erwin and Hange if they’re even together,” Eren considers, “There’s only one way to find out. On Friday, we have to keep our eyes peeled.”
Everyone nods in agreement, while Mikasa rolls her eyes.
“Let’s start a betting pool,” Connie suggests and murmurs of consensus float amongst them.
“Let me get this straight,” Mikasa begins, “You all want to start a betting pool between our superiors to see if they’re dating or not.”
“Exactly,” Connie says with a wolfish grin, “Where’s your sense of fun, Ackerman?”
“You and I have different definitions of fun,” Mikasa mutters, “But I’m in.”
“Mikasa, Eren and I have a meeting with her later today,” Armin says thoughtfully, “Let’s see what we can gather. But I think Friday will be the day we’ll be able to investigate.”
***
Armin sees no sign of Levi in your office. He only sees a few photo frames with you and the rest of the senior members of the team. There’s two photo frames he’s unable to catch a glimpse of as it’s at the corner of the desk where only you can easily see it. There is a single crystal sunflower near your computer, safely kept in a box but that can’t mean anything. It’s been there since forever- you must have purchased it on your own when you started working here, Armin deduces confidently.
Unless it was a gift from a long time ago. Unless you and Levi have been dating for years, which is why this sunflower has been sitting on your desk perfect and poised all this time. That can’t be possible- there’s no sign of it. Even when they were interns, which was only a few years ago, there was no sign of it.
Was there even any sign of it now? 
“I like this,” You say, pulling Armin out of his thoughts, “I think it’s a good point to make, that we have to advertise to these kids in a way that’ll intrigue them. Which is why we brought you in. I guess the next step would be scoping out methods of advertising that would work… You three up to the task?”
Eren and Armin nod their heads in determination but Mikasa doesn’t look convinced.
“Isn’t Captain from the Underground? Wouldn’t he be better suited for something like this?” Mikasa asks.
“How do you know that?” You raise an eyebrow, an edge of protectiveness showing itself.
“Everyone knows that,” Mikasa says easily.
You suppose that’s true.
“Hmmm,” You muse, rubbing your chin, “How do you feel about working with Levi on this? You’re right, Mikasa. That he’d be better suited for something like this rather than me.”
“She meant no offense by it-” Armin protests.
“None taken,” You give her a small smile, “Takes balls to challenge your superiors. I can appreciate that.
“Why don’t you three and whoever else you see fit come up with a proposal and send it my way in the next week or so? I’ll review it and you can present it to Levi,” You suggest and Armin’s eyes are as wide as saucers.
“Present to Captain?” Eren sputters.
“You can do it. If you can present it to me, then you can present it to him,” You say with a smile, “I have full confidence in you.”
Mikasa adjusts her scarf, pulling it further up her face but you don’t miss the flash of excitement in her eyes. It seems like she likes a challenge.
***
By the time Friday rolls around, Erwin had encouraged you all to go home early and get the weekend started early. Levi protests, telling him that there’s still a mountain of paperwork to do. Which isn’t entirely untrue, but it can wait until the following Monday.
“Don’t complain about being able to go home early, stupid,” You mutter, elbowing his side.
He just rolls his eyes in response.
“I’ll see you all there at 9:30,” Erwin says, giving you all a look. The thinly veiled threat is there- don’t be late or else.
You and Levi are usually some of the last to leave the office. You both have a habit of cleaning up your offices as the day ends, before you leave. You clean up your papers, put away your pens and store your laptop in your backpack as you give your desk a once over. You’re gentle with your shoulder, not wanting to irritate it further as it had only just started calming down. 
You’re about to reach for something under your desk when Levi walks into your office and stops you.
“You’re trying to injure yourself aren’t you,” Levi mutters, shooing you away and crouching, “Stupid.”
“Thanks for your concern,” You mumble, “Ass.”
Levi turns from under your desk, still crouched and looking up at you through narrowed eyes. A smirk curls on your lips and he rolls his eyes at your antics.
“I could get used to the way you look right now,” You say with a wink.
“You already are used to it,” Levi drones on, “You forget about this morning?”
“No,” You murmur and trail a finger over his chest when he stands up straight, “Been thinking about this morning all day.”
Levi catches your finger with his larger hand and your breath hitches as you peer at him curiously. 
“C’mon,” He tugs your hand along, “Let’s go home then.”
***
Your shoulder finally feels healed enough that you can drive without experiencing discomfort. Your hand immediately settles over Levi’s thigh when you put the car in drive, randomly squeezing.
All the signs are there. You’re in a mood today. He thinks maybe you miss him more than you’re letting on, despite living together and working together. The two of you haven’t had a chance for alone time or a date in quite some time, and he knows you’re looking forward to tonight for that very reason. 
While it’s not exactly a date, it’s still a chance to be out and enjoy each other.
“Those kids are up to something,” You break the silence softly.
“They’re always up to something,” Levi says, peering out of the window. It’s an overcast and slightly chilly day, the sun nowhere to be found. You hum in agreement, moving your hand to find his. He watches your entire body relax once you slot your hand in his.
“I saw them watching us,” Levi continues, “Watching me leave your office, specifically.”
You laugh at that, “Maybe they’re trying to figure out which one of their bosses is sleeping together.”
“You and Hange, right? Knew it,” Levi says, pulling another laugh from you.
“Nailed it.”
***
One of Levi’s favorite rituals with you was the art of undressing each other after a long day. As soon as you both wash your hands and remove traces of the day from your faces after coming home, your hands are flat over his chest, fingers playing with the buttons of his shirt.
With each button that comes undone, you press a kiss to his newly exposed skin. He only watches your fingers move slowly, as if they’re moving through honey as you touch him. 
He stops you once you push his button up and undershirt off of him and toss it into his hamper. Levi’s hands are on your cheeks, sliding down the side of your neck, and he finally, finally presses kisses to your aching lips. 
Levi pulls away for a breath, thumbing at your cheek and you lean into his touch with hooded eyes. He runs a hand under your top, drumming along your sides before pulling your top off. 
“I missed you,” You say feebly, your heart in your throat. How can you miss someone in this way- someone who you’ve given your heart, mind and soul to? How can you miss someone when he’s standing right in front of you, when you wake up beside him, when you go to sleep beside him?
You don’t know. You just miss him.
“I know,” Levi murmurs, “I know.”
He lifts you up in his arms, dropping kisses to your neck and walking you to the bed. Letting you down gently, he slots himself in between your legs and his touch tells you everything he doesn’t say.
Levi melts into you as your legs wrap around his waist, his breaths soft against your skin. Your touches are urgent, fleeting on his arms, seemingly trying to claw yourself to him.
He’s been neglecting your needs. He had needed some space over the last week- sometimes things became heavy for him. Especially around this time of year. The death anniversary of his mother had been several weeks ago, but you had understood his need for space. As you always did. Space for him meant keeping to himself and staying at home, and you’d always be by his side. Even if he didn’t ask.
“Thank you for coming back to me,” You murmur, as you always do around this time of the year. You press a gentle kiss to his chin. You knew he was starting to come out of it when he had woken you up in your favorite way this morning.
“I know it seems like I’m far away,” He replies, nosing at your neck, “I’ve been neglecting you.”
But you’re already shaking your head in disbelief.
“No,” You say firmly, cupping his cheek, “No. You know you never have to justify why you need what you need. If you need space, you need space. Don’t do that.”
No matter how many times you say it, he still needs to hear it. His slate grey eyes are wide and he ducks his head quickly, arms around your head as he swallows your words, your understanding with another kiss.
Words melt into soft breaths, sighs and quiet laughs within the four walls of your bedroom after that. 
***
You had coaxed Levi into an afternoon nap with you and he had fallen asleep with his contacts still in his eyes. No wonder his eyes were burning now. Stupid contacts.
Levi tries to get up from bed without disturbing you and it seems like he is mostly successful. You turn in your sleep, curling into his pillow before settling back in.
He goes to the bathroom and stares at himself in the mirror before prying his dried out contacts from his eyes and grabbing his glasses from the first drawer of the nightstand next to the bed.
Much better.
He sees you waking up now, watching him with lazy eyes and a hazy smile. You carelessly throw your arm across the bed, indicating that you want him to come back and lay with you. 
“Move over,” Levi murmurs and settles next to you, pulling the covers up over you both once more. 
“Wow,” You say with a gasp, voice thick with sleep, “Wear glasses more often, huh?”
“Shut up,” Levi mutters, avoiding your gaze. 
You just smile and draw patterns on his arm, pulling him in for another slow, languid kiss.
“I mean it,” You say, “I mean, if I was just a girl in a bar, I wouldn’t stand a chance.”
That pulls a small smile from him and it makes your heart burst.
“You have it the other way around,” He says, grey eyes filled with an emotion you’re all too familiar with. You run your fingers through his long strands of inky hair as they fall to his face when he leans in closer to you. A lazy silence falls between you, only lending way to more firm yet gentle touches.
***
Levi had done your hair for you, after you had claimed that your shoulder was hurting again. He had rolled his eyes, knowing that you just wanted him to play with your hair.
“I don’t blame you, I do your hair better anyway,” He had scoffed. And he was sometimes right- Levi was well versed in taking care of your hair. Which surprised you.
He had kissed you a few times before you both had headed out for the night, unable to resist your glossy lips- “Levi. We’re gonna be late and Erwin will-”
“Stop talking about fuckin’ Erwin and let me kiss you.”
“I’m not talking about fuckin’ Erwin, but I mean should we? Is that something we need to talk about-”
“You’re insufferable,” And he shuts you up with a searing kiss as your back is pressed against the front door.
And now you’re at the bar with Hange, ordering a round of drinks for the four of you. The newbies wouldn’t be arriving till about thirty minutes later. Erwin had told the four of you to meet a little earlier to have your own intimate toast. 
You bring two drinks in your hand and slide into the booth across from Levi and next to Hange. Sliding a drink over to Levi, you take a sip of your own and you feel his foot nudge yours in thanks.
“Cheers to us,” You begin, “For being awesome, especially me.”
“Oi, Levi, get your woman,” Hange says, earning herself a hearty glare from Levi.
Erwin rolls his eyes fondly with a quirk of his lips, “Yes, we’ve done some great things individually and as a group over the last few months. And years. Think of where we’ve started. How far we’ve come and how far we have to go.”
“I’ll drink to that, boss,” Hange says, raising her glass.
“Hange, you’ll drink to anything,” Levi says but raises his glass as well.
“Cheers, Erwin. To many more successes and many more years together,”  You murmur, eyes flashing to Levi for a split second. You meet his eyes over your glass. He’s always been able to read you easily, and the openness of your heart still startles him even now.
He hopes he can get a few minutes alone with you at the bar. Or in a booth. Levi wants to show you that in a bar full of strangers, he’ll always pick you. Without hesitation.
***
It’s only about an hour into the interns arriving, and you and Hange already have the second round of drinks ready for them. Your smile is loose and wide, laugh loud and uninhibited as you hold your second drink in your hands. Or is it your third?
You’re chatting with Jean and Connie, head thrown back in laughter at something Jean said. You seem to have a soft spot for those two, as Levi recalls. You tug on your necklace, as if you can feel Levi glance over you. It’s a necklace that he had given you for one of your anniversaries and it’s one of your favorites.
Those kids are up to something, Levi can sense it in their careful but curious gazes.  He pays them no mind, instead turning his head to speak to Mikasa and Hange. Levi catches Mikasa looking around, her line of vision always falling to Eren.
Levi very nearly asks Mikasa if she’s bored but refrains from doing so, hearing your chastising voice in his head. Telling him not to embarrass her.
So he stays quiet and instead entertains Hange’s thought that him and Mikasa may be related.
***
“Hi,” You murmur, sliding into the booth with Levi right behind you. The booth is slightly hidden from the rest of the bar patrons. Not that either of you were trying to hide. You were just looking for some quiet. You wrap your arm around his, your chin over his shoulder as you lean against him.
“Hi,” Levi repeats, “Found time for me, huh?”
“Don’t be like that,” You whisper, nudging him gently. He can smell alcohol but mostly just the scent of your perfume.
“Be like what?”
“Mean,” You mumble, “Be mean to me.”
“Oh, alright. I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Levi says and your eyes glow bright at the pet name, a smile pulling across your lips. 
“Are you having fun?” You ask softly, tugging his hand into yours, “Will you have my drink? I can’t finish it.”
Levi nearly scoffs, a memory of the first time you had asked him to finish a drink for you bubbling to the surface. He had looked at you like you had four heads- don’t you know how disgusting and unclean that was? It took him a while to learn that you ask him things like that out of comfort with him.
“It’s a whiskey based drink. I think you’ll like it,” You continue, fingers tracing the slopes and planes of his face.
So this was how you were feeling tonight. Touchy. Maybe a little needy. You pull your hand away offering him your drink.
Levi takes the drink from your hands and sets it on the table. You’re about to say something but he cups your face with both hands, pressing his forehead to yours. You hold his wrist with your hand, eyes wide and soft.
He kisses you deeply, without a word or a shared breath between you. You gasp in surprise but he deepens the kiss, as if he’s trying to melt into you.
“I fuckin’ love you,” Levi murmurs, “You know that? I fuckin’ love you.”
“Levi,” You breathe, “I know and I love you. I told you I wouldn’t stand a chance. I’m just a girl in a bar.”
The pads of your thumbs press against the back of his neck, rubbing slow circles. He likes the look on your face, dark eyes filled with ease and trust.
Both of you pretend to not see a stoic but interested gaze looking in your direction.
Mikasa had seen you and Levi duck out from the crowd with a drink in your hand to a quieter booth. She watches you pull him next to you and lean into him, but Mikasa turns her head away when she sees Levi duck his head to kiss you. She doesn’t want to intrude on a clearly intimate moment, but she can’t help but agree with Jean.
If you both were trying to keep your relationship a secret from Erwin, you were doing a pretty shitty job of it. Mikasa wrestles with telling everyone about her findings, but ultimately decides against it. For now. She’d wait to see if anyone else picked up on anything going on between you and Levi.
“Those kids have a bet going on with us,” You inform Levi, once you see Mikasa watching you briefly from across the bar.
“Do they?” Levi hums, pressing a kiss to your neck as you rub his chest.
“Yeah,” You say breathily, “Half of them think we’re dating in secret, and the other half think that we’re not dating at all.”
Levi pulls away with a raised eyebrow, “They don’t have anything better to do?”
“They’re curious about their incredibly good looking superiors,” You say with a smile, “Can you blame them?”
“So let’s give them something to be curious about,” Levi murmurs and dips his head again for another searing kiss. You briefly think about how comfortable he’s become with you and with kissing you in public like this. It doesn’t happen often, but you’re not one to complain when it does. You pull away first, thumb running over his bitten, gloss stained bottom lip.
“We should head back,” You murmur, “Before Erwin thinks we left him alone with the kids.”
Levi nods, taking the now empty glass and holding out his hand for you. His hand is light on your waist as you both walk back to your group, and his eyes are as scorching as ever when he sees Jean and Connie looking at you both with wide eyes.
You and Levi part ways- you going to talk to Sasha, Jean and Connie and Levi sitting with Erwin, Eren and Armin.
Eren and Armin already looked tense, sitting with Erwin, and it increases tenfold when Levi sits with them too.
Levi sees you dancing with Sasha to the beat of the music while Jean and Connie look awkwardly around. And then you take their hands and try to get them to dance with you, and Levi shakes his head at your antics.
Poor kids. They look flustered.
“What’s the matter with you two? You look like you’re constipated,” Levi comments to Armin and Eren and they both stammer in response, trying to hold a conversation with their boss and their boss’s boss.
They both relax when they pull a smile from Erwin.
***
You and Levi are the last ones at the bar, as Hange had only just left and Erwin had entrusted the both of you to make sure that the new hires got home safely. Before Levi could protest, you had agreed and heard him curse under his breath. All Levi can think about is you, in those tight jeans, your glossy lips, your heels and his button-up.
He’s had a few drinks by now, and it’s not his fault you’re so pretty.
Levi just wants to take you home and show you how pretty he thinks you are, but instead you had agreed to babysit the interns. Of course, he’s going to grumble about it.
“They’re all grown adults. They can fend for themselves,” Levi complains, without any real heat behind it.
“Oh, now they’re adults? They’re not kids anymore?” You tease, nudging his shoulder.
“Shut up,” He replies, nudging you back.
You and Levi manage to coordinate cabs for them- you call Sasha, Connie, Jean a cab since they live in the same apartment building and Levi calls Armin and Eren a cab, since they’re roommates. Mikasa lives closer to you and Levi, so you decide to take a cab to her apartment building and then take a cab from there back home.
“Text us when you get home,” You say sweetly, waving at both sets of cabs and they all chirp promises of agreement.
The cab that Levi had ordered for the three of you is on its way and you stand under the light of the streetlamp, making smalltalk with Mikasa. You learn that she enjoys the outdoors and hiking quite a bit, and you suggest a few places she might like. 
“There’s also Claw Mountain, in Wall Maria,” Levi muses, “We went there once, remember?” 
“Yeah! You can see Wall Rose and Wall Sina from there,” You reply. 
Mikasa quirks an eyebrow at you both but says nothing. She nestles herself against her red scarf when a breeze of wind threads itself in the spaces between the three of you and you shudder lightly. Mikasa contains her gasp when Levi wordlessly pulls his jacket off and wraps it around your shoulders. You smile at him in gratitude and to Mikasa’s surprise, he returns your smile.
Mikasa can’t think of a time where she’s ever seen him smile like that.
Once the cab arrives, you sit in the middle of Levi and Mikasa. You can’t resist leaning into him as his arm wraps around your shoulders. Mikasa’s eyes are nearly bulging out of her head at the small but meaningful action. There’s no way you two aren’t together, and there’s no way that either of you are actively trying to keep it a secret.
You’re looking at Mikasa knowingly, with a quiet smirk and she thinks you already know about the bet. You say nothing, instead yawning and asking Mikasa if she has any plans for the weekend. As you hold a quiet conversation with her, you’re rubbing absent-minded circles against Levi’s inner thigh. Your hand is covered by his jacket and Levi thinks he’s about to lose his mind. Is this cab even moving? Could it be moving any slower?
Levi lets out a breath of relief when they arrive at Mikasa’s apartment building. She bids you goodbye and waves. You stay in the cab until she gets up to her apartment, waiting for a text from her. Once you receive the text from Mikasa, you tell the cab driver that you’re good to go. You tilt your head onto Levi’s shoulder with a soft sigh.
His face is as expressionless as ever, but he’s just so impatient. 
Levi nearly pulls you out of the car in one smooth action, leading you home with a hand at the small of your back after he nearly throws his credit card at the cab driver.
He hears your laugh from next to him and shoots you a glare with no heat behind it. Obvious impatience is not something you see often on him- it’s only fitting that it’s due to you. 
Your movements are slowing down, clearly an indication of your feet beginning to hurt. Levi immediately picks up on it, wordlessly scooping you into his arms to walk into your building. You remember the first time he had carried you home when your feet were beginning to hurt. You were about to slip out of your heels and walk barefoot when he had looked at you with disgust. He had told you that he’d carry you home for his own sanity. After all, he wouldn’t be able to sleep well knowing that you had willingly dirtied your feet.
Your arms loop around his neck, fingers lightly scratching at his undercut.
You’re smiling at him softly and he breathes out a grumpy “What you lookin’ at?”
“Nothin, just my stupid boyfriend,” You reply with a gasp when he threatens to drop you.
“Boyfriend? That’s all I am to you?” 
“How about soulmate? Or other half?” 
“I think you mean better half,” Levi mutters, somehow swiping into the building and walking to the elevators easily. He earns himself a particularly hard scratch to the back of his head and a playful glare from you.
Levi holds you easily, without breaking a sweat. You trace over the collar of his shirt, dipping your fingers under to press against his necklace. Pulling your hand away, you push his glasses up his nose before they slide down. He’s incredibly handsome with or without glasses, but you can’t seem to tear your eyes away from him.
“You’ve got a staring problem,” Levi tells you and you scoff.
“Sorry for admiring my incredibly handsome better half,” You roll your eyes.
“Tch.”
 It’s when you’ve both finished your skincare routines, you’re both in sleep clothes next to each other in bed and your legs are barely touching. It’s when he sees a smokey sort of fatigue curling up in your brown eyes. It’s when a sliver of moonlight reflects off of your brown skin that he pulls you into his side and tells you that you’re the best part of him. That you’re his better half.
Levi doesn’t say it so much as he shows it.
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markftmingi · 4 years
Text
the mc pres : johnny seo
the mc pres : johnny seo
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SUMMARY: an au in which two people run into each other after 5 years but they aren't the same people they used to be...
PAIRING: mafia leader!johnny x teacher/single mom! reader
GENRE: angst, suggestive themes, and some smut.
WARNING(S): this isn’t fully written ok this is a unfinished piece i did like almost two years ago so its kinda bad and skips around but i wanted to post it anyways lmao, swearing, slight smut but it’s more of like a flashback of when it happened(?)
WORD COUNT: 2797
"okay everyone, class dismissed," you announced, smiling.
the class, individually, walked out of the classroom. your assistant and best friend, qian kun, stood by the door to say goodbye to the students. some said goodbye to you too, some didn't. you were too tired to notice who said what. you did notice your favorite two students walk in once everyone left.
one of two being mark lee. mark has been one of your students for the past 3 four years. you didn't know many of your students' personal lives but he had a public reputation. he's a member of the biggest motorcycle club in all of south korea. you didn't know much about the gang but you heard the roar of the motorcycles go by your apartment everyday. mark's feared by everyone here... except yourself, kun, and lucas. you all knew he was too much of a goofball to really hurt anyone. then there was lucas. he's the same age as mark so you had him as a student for 3 years too. he was taller than mark and a lot more scarier. the 6'0 young man was a selective mute who glared at everyone who even glanced at him. lucas gained a reputation as fighter in his freshman year after he nearly beat a senior to death when he was being made fun of. the next day, lucas walked in with mark sporting matching leather jackets with NCT stitched across the back. when kun came in two years ago, lucas tried to scare him off. luckily, kun wasn't the kind of person to be easily scared. they were both chinese, shy but had horrible tempers. after a heart to heart with him, he let his guard down around you and kun.
“you look horrible,” lucas said once he fully looked at you.
mark slapped his shoulder, “she doesn’t look horrible... the bags under her eyes do.
"leave her alone guys... they're designer bags." kun joked, making the two boys laugh.
"i'm convinced you all hate me." you said playfully, undoing your hair.
it had been pinned into a tight bun all day, giving you a headache. you also kicked off your heels as well - the daily ritual after school.
"i don't get how you deal with kids all day." mark questioned taking out his homework.
"you're one of those kids i have to deal with all day."
he rolled his eyes, "not me... i don't count. you love me."
"yeah yeah, back to work." you smiled, as you began to plan for the next day.
that's how you spent your afternoons. the four of you would stay after school until your daughter got out of school too. lucas and mark doing homework and projects while kun and yourself planned what you would teach next. if they wanted to talk or vent to you, they would... especially lucas.
the two hours went by and you were now walking out the school.
"you two need a ride?" kun offered them.
lucas shook his head and nodded towards the parking lot. you turned around seeing a small group of bikers staring back at you.
"o-oh." you stuttered.
you couldn't see their faces clearly due to face masks and sunglasses but you were intimidated. three tall, muscular men with motorcycles staring at you was not something you’re used to. they both said goodbye before walking towards the group.
"i couldn't even see their eyes but it still feels like the one in front was staring into my soul,” you mumbled to kun as you walked to his car.
he shrugged casually, "maybe he was."
"kun, this isn't funny."
"relax", kun pulled you closer, "they have a bad reputation but they're not randomly going to jump you or kill you. they go after those who cause problems or mess with them. you're innocent… well some nights you are."
you ignored the smirk on his face and got into his car. kun's apartment was right next to yours. he's heard your moans and screams plenty of times due to your previous relationship. he swore he wasn't that bothered by it but it was still embarrassing.
"kun?" you turned towards him, “what are you doing later?”
he thought for a moment, "well... we still have to finish wednesday's lesson plan. so i will be over to cook my god-daughter dinner and then we're going to work."
you let out a long, dramatic sigh as you got out the car. it was going to be a long night.
•••
the next day was uneventful. classes were boring and you wanted to leave. you loved teaching. it's always been your dream job but some days, you craved a vacation.
you currently didn't have a class right now so you were printing notes of today’s lessons. the door opened slightly, making you sit up. it was only kun.
"so you have a visitor." he said, with an unsure look on his face.
"why the face? who is it?"
"it's one of those bikers from yesterday. apparently he's also legally lucas's guardian." kun admitted.
lucas' guardian? you both knew lucas never mentioned his parents but you didn't assume he was adopted either.
"you can send him in. i'll be okay."
kun nodded before disappearing again. you closed your eyes and took a deep breath. you were nervous. why did he want to meet with you? was it strictly about lucas?
a knock on the door made you sit up again. the door opened and it was the last person you ever expected to see.
johnny smirked slightly, "hey, y/n.”
"oh you have got to be kidding me." you mumbled to yourself.
johnny seo. a man you met back in your hometown of chicago. his mother lived next door to your family. you remembered her telling you that her son was finally coming home. when you saw the then 20 year old man, you knew he was trouble. yet you were still so eager to trust him and give yourself away. but that was five years ago. back when you were in college. back when you were dumb and naive. back when you fell in love for the first time.
back before he left you pregnant without a word.
"i came here yesterday to pick lucas and mark and i was very surprised to see you walk out with them." johnny said as he walked closer to you.
"there is no way this is happening right now." you laughed but there was no humor in your voice.
johnny ignored your remarks and openly checked you out, "you look as beautiful as ever... how've you been?"
you scoffed and looked up at him fully for the first time since he walked in. he looked as beautiful as ever too. his hair was longer and lighter than it used to be. he was more fit and had a few more tattoos. those beautiful brown eyes were what changed the most. they were much colder and didn't hold that same sparkle that they used to.
"i don't know why my well-being should concern you but as lucas' guardian, you should focus on mentioning him." you said, folding your hands gently in your lap.
johnny leaned on your desk, "mark always mentioned a ms. y/n that him and lucas stayed after school with and i just knew it couldn't have been you... i should've known though. y/n isn't a common name here. you always talked about how much you wanted to be a teacher and help kids and how much you wanted to come to seoul."
"if you're not here about lucas, you can leave, mr. seo." you stated before getting up.
this whole situation was insane. you never thought you’d run into johnny again. your life was going great. now all of the sudden, he's in your classroom, making your heart beat out of your chest. you erased the chalkboard and wrote the date in the top right corner. when you turned back around, johnny's arms trapped you against the board.
"why are you ignoring me like this?" johnny mumbled.
"there's nothing i have to say to you anymore. when you have to talk about lucas, then i'll talk to you." you said, pushing him away.
he sighed, "i want to talk about us, sweetheart. lucas is 21. he can handle himself. as far as i know, his grades are good. well, that's what mark tells me. that kid doesn't even talk."
you raised an eyebrow, "he doesn't talk to you?"
"no, he only talks to mark... does he talk to you?"
"yeah," you held back a laugh, "looks like i have more of a connection with your gang than you do and you're the leader."
johnny shrugged, "you might have more of a connection with mark and lucas than i do... but you and i have a better connection than anybody."
"had... had a connection. a one-sided one at that."
"i cared about you. just not how you cared about me. i never loved you. you were just supposed to be a fling. although i will admit i called my mom to see how you and the baby were doing. crying into your pillow for two weeks? that's a little pathetic, don't you think?" he asked, leaning against the board.
"fuck you, johnny. you left me. how was i supposed to feel?"
"i told you. you meant nothing to me."
"obviously if you left me as soon as i said i was pregnant." you whispered but you knew he heard you.
the door opened, making both of your heads look towards it. kun.
"am i interrupting something?" kun asked, setting a pack of papers on his desk.
"no, i was just leaving." johnny announced as he walked towards the door, "see you soon, sweetheart.”
as soon as johnny left, you let out a big sigh.
"what the hell happened?" kun asked as he began to separate the papers.
"that man... was johnny as in the same johnny who left me in chicago... jasmine's father."
kun knew everything. being that you only had three friends, two of them being your students, you told him your life story.
"no way... did you know he was that motorcycle president back there?"
you shook your head, "when i first met him in chicago, people around the city had warned me that he was no good. that he only came back to chicago to avoid getting into trouble in korea. i didn't know he was in a motorcycle club at all. i was too blind to see all that."
"too blind because your face was being pushed into his pillow?" kun slyly asked.
you scoffed, "keep stapling papers, qian."
your mind flashed back to what johnny said before he left...
see you soon, sweetheart.
•••
johnny sighed for the nth time this evening. he couldn't get you out of his head now. the woman he thought he left for good. when he met in you in your shared hometown, he thought you were perfect for his needs- beautiful and naive as fuck. you were a really good person. really nice, caring, the total package. he ruined that... almost every night. you didn't deserve that. you didn't deserve for johnny to ruin your innocence just for you to fall in love and have him leave months later.
one day you told johnny you were pregnant. the next day, he was on a plane back to south korea. johnny wondered how the kid was doing. she or he would be about 5 years old. maybe 6. did they look like him? did they look more like you? were they a perfect combination of you both?
"why the fuck am i thinking about this shit now? i didn't give a fuck before." johnny mumbled to himself.
it was roughly 12:30am. johnny wondered if you were still the night owl he remembered you to be. most of that coming from when he used to keep you up all night. he wondered if you’d been with anyone since him. who was he kidding? you were gorgeous and your body was perfect. you could easily have men crawling at the sight of you. the thought of another man touching you bothered johnny. he knew no one could make you feel like he did though. you always felt so tight and wet around him…mouth always ready to take him whenever he asked… the sinful screams and scratches when he’d fuck you real good. johnny could feel himself getting hard at the thought.
he got up and headed out the door. he knew he would end up regretting this later...
•••
you gasped when you opened the door, "johnny, what the fuck are you doing here?"
"i told you that i was going to see you soon,” johnny said quietly as he took in your appearance.
you crossed your arms, "when you said soon, i didn't think it'd be a day later. i also didn't think it would be at 1:38am... or at my house."
"maybe i missed you,” he smirked slightly.
"bullshit. seriously johnny, why are you here? how'd you even know where i live?"
"let me in and i'll tell you."
you looked up into his eyes before opening the door further. johnny smiled at you as he walked in.
"okay, so answer my questions." you demanded walking into the kitchen area.
"i am here because i was thinking about you." he admitted, staring at the marble counter.
"thinking about me for what?"
"well... i was actually i was thinking about how it felt to be inside of you then i got hard and decided to visit you."
you rolled your eyes, "at least you're being honest now."
"what do you mean 'now'? i was honest before." johnny questioned, slightly offended.
"no, you weren't johnny... not to me."
"i couldn't be honest to you. what did you want me to say? 'hey i'm only here until it’s clear for me to go back home. i killed a few people and had to lay low in chicago. you're a beautiful woman and all. i love hanging out with you but i love fucking you more. don't get attached though because i'm going to leave you.' is that what you wanted me to say?" he asked.
you threw your hands in the air, "yes! i would've loved to hear that. it would have saved me from heartbreak and trust issues. i was 20 and naive but if you told me that you just wanted a fuck buddy, then i wouldn't have gotten attached and i definitely would've kept condoms around!"
johnny looked taken back. he’s never seen you this mad before.
"who the fuck are you yelling at?” his words sounded cold but he was more intrigued than mad.
"i'm not yelling at you. i am talking loud. i'm tired of you already and it's only been two days! when you left, i blamed myself, wondering what i did wrong. i was stressed about having to carry a child for nine months and raise it all while being a full-time college student. it was your fault johnny! you and your shit communication skills!" you ranted, breathing heavily.
"momma." a small voice called out.
johnny’s head quickly turned towards the door. your little girl was standing there in a matching pj set. just one look at her and anyone could tell she was johnny’s daughter. you could see that jasmine had his eyes, nose and lips but had your hair and skin tone. your daughter was beautiful.
"yes, baby?" you replied softly, "did i wake you?"
"a little... who's he?" jasmine asked.
johnny crouched down to her level, "i- i'm johnny. your... mother's friend."
she tilted her head at him, "i'm 5 but i'm not stupid. you're my daddy. you look just like me."
"if anything, you look just like me." johnny corrected her.
"nope! you copied me first!" she shot back,
"wait. momma, you're crying."
johnny turned around to see you quickly wiping your tears away.
"i'm fine, jasmine, go and lay back down okay?”
she nodded and skipped off into her room.
johnny cleared his throat, “i know you don’t want to hear this… but i have to be in her life, y/n. i know that i fucked up but she deserves to have a father in her life.”
you scoffed, “wow. now the mafia leader wants to tell me what MY daughter needs. that’s funny.”
“it’s OUR daughter and you know i’m right.”
he was right. you didn’t want your daughter to grow up without her father, but you’d never admit that to him. you knew all the trouble being in the mafia brought to johnny and you feared the same thing would happen to your little girl.
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