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thegoldensundreamer · 3 months

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Love At Last

Onyankopon x black!reader

Warnings: exes, use of n word, squirting, fingering (f receiving), eating out (f receiving)

Word Count: 6.2k

He was a little older than me. A junior, and I, a sophomore. In college, you only had two focuses: have fun and study, and truthfully it helped me. No matter what anyone told me I had control to do whatever I wanted in life and didn't want anyone's opinions on how I'd be living it.

Honestly, that's what made my other ex's love me and even some, hate me. But I mean it wasn't like he was always putting his expectations too high for me. Onyankopon just wanted to see me as my best self. When we broke up and I told him the reason as to why I couldn't do it anymore, it all really didn't make sense. I wanted to tell myself that I knew the reason as to why he was just so terrible but subconsciously I knew I didn't. And it was hard for me these past months. Really hard. I been seeing him on campus like a thousand times and he just keeps getting more beautiful and glowin like the sun.

He's the head of his team now and it never helps me that he didn't ever have any girls he just messed around with. Especially bonding and having a real relationship with his exes. Including me. And Its painful seeing him just living his life and me not hating him for any reason because he is really a great guy. So whenever I see him I make sure to shift my eyes to the complete opposite direction of where his head is at. Or even cover my face with a book or a water bottle to not have that awkward walk past. But I kind of wish he chased after me... and although I know its selfish I'm just as confused as when I left that boy. But I guess we all just have to move on.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"The assignment is still due this Sunday at 11:59 on Blackboard. I don't want any emails, text messages, or conversations next class about an extension. Period."

I honestly think Professor Rodriguez is tweaking now. No excuses? What if someone is sick or something?

The whole class groans as we pack all of our stuff. I mean, it's just a paper so I'm not tripping or anything. I just got to make sure to do it before the Que party this weekend. There's never been a problem before so I don't think I have anything to worry about.

Me and my girls have been planning to go to one of the Que parties we keep infamously hearing about. It's always wild, lit, and memorable till you graduate. All of a sudden when you get that degree they don't exist no more because you don't want no one to know of the hoe tales.

I haven't been to one of their parties yet, but Im excited. I haven't been outside in a while especially since I ended things with Ony. A few kickbacks here and there were going on this past semester for me but that's about it. I like being inside just as much or even more than I like being out.

When I walk down the university building, I put in my headphones ready to blast some Sexyy Red. That woman music got something in it I swear.

"I'm looking for the hoooesssss" I mouth to myself while I nod my head. Shit, I forgot how hard that bass goes. As I bob my head I can't remotely hear the voice behind me trying to catch my attention.

It was Jaden, one of Ony’s teammates, and he's also in Professor Rodriquez class. He gave up calling my name and just let me go.

•••

When I finally left the building and head to my car I instantly switch my music over to the Bluetooth aux and look at my assignment before I pull off. You see... he assigned it to us last Friday and I for real have just been procrastinating till now. I would say my time management is usually really good but its not.

"Ok so I got to just write about 500 words. I could do this tonight no problem."

I put down my phone and start adjusting my rear view mirror only to find light grey clouds of the day turning darker grey. I really hope it don't storm when I'm on the road.

Driving out of the lot and onto the highway, I continue blasting my hoochie playlist. Shrugging at the random pain in my heart I'm feeling, I call one of my girls talking about how much I think this party gon cut all my feelings from Ony and revive the party girl in me.

Im pulling into my apartment complex excited . I haven't been this joyous to go to a party in a while. The mere thought of shaking ass is bringing me serotonin. Just a sweet release of stress. Plus, it's Friday and the party is Saturday night so I'm definitely geeking.

When I stumble up the steps right before the entrance to my residence giddy and jovial, looking for my key, I slightly looked up. The scream in my head is definitely showing me how much I'm not over this feeling in my heart.

I stopped my movement and fought the urge to back step all the way back into my car and hide. I'm not sure why hes here at this time. It's 5:30 which isn't late for real but just a bit confusing enough to make you question why the hell someone is at your door uninvited. Especially since its here. At my apartment. And it's him. With his aura and skin glistening like oil on a hot body.

He was in some black muscle shirt with matching jogger pants. Shyly smiling at me at first but then noticing my expression, he looked down at the state of his body and cringed before looking back in my eyes. Clearly embarrassed. "Sorry you seeing me like this, I just came from practice so I'm still a little sweaty"

I secretly moaned in my head. He looks so good I had to catch my breath and his voice is still captivating up to now. I still can't forget the way he used to t-

I'm getting sidetracked. Let me regain this composure.

"Is there something you need?" I quietly ask. This is no good. The whole point is out of sight out of mind. You know how you want to block somebody on everything and really go out of your way to not see them in person so you won't have to think about them or double back? Well I feel like I'm breaking that right now. It's not my fault sure but the shame still feels the same.

Ony pulls out an object from his pocket. A white, slightly long but thin figure. He looks at it for a moment before looking up at me again and holding it up.

"I came here to give this to you. Im pretty sure it's yours. At least that's what Jaden said."

I squint my eyes in confusion at what he was holding and hurriedly looked through my tote bag to find that I did not have my Apple Pencil for my iPad.

So that's why he's here.

Apple pencils are expensive so I'm not mad. I would've been more upset if I only figured out I dropped it when I got inside and tried to start my paper. But how did he even get it?

He reached his arm out as I began to walk up to him for my pencil. I thanked him for bringing it to me and awkward silence overtook the little rain droplets that noted the thunderstorm about to take place.

Our hands touched ever so slightly as I grabbed my missing pencil. I withdrew immediately and he did the same faintly after. After a few long seconds, he broke the silence.

"Jaden gave it to me at the locker rooms after practice. He said he tried to give it to you after class but couldn't catch up or something so I guess he just wanted me to carry out the deed especially with some paper he mentioned."

I grinned and slightly nodded in understanding, quickly glancing at his eyes before staring at the Apple Pencil. It's strange. He can't really look me in the eye. I mean, I can't either but he's 6'2" so my excuse is good. On top of that, the nonchalance in his tone doesn't sit right with me. It's either he's forcing it or a part of me wants to believe he is just to delude myself that he still cares. It's unfair of me, especially since I probably broke his heart, but it's the real.

"I'll thank Jaden when I see him next class. Thank you for bringing it to me." I quip and walk past him to my door, beginning to find my keys in my bag with the pencil still in hand.

Damn when did I get this shy?

Onys attempt at being nonchalant somewhat was breaking. He stared at the pencil smiling as he spoke and pointed.

"I'm surprised you still have Chowder on there".

I turned my head around, mid-hand in bag. He was referring to the little sticker I had on my ex-missing item. The one that would help me differentiate my pencil from everyone else's so no one would take it. The one he gave me as a funny gift for the love of our mutual favorite childhood show.

I'm surprised he still remembers these little details about me. About us.

"Well it's still my favorite show. I don't think that's ever going to change." I giggle looking back for my keys.

It's hard to do this. To face him. How do people talk to their exes? This isn't even my first but damn. Now my minds all over the place with him and us all over it. All those memories we share. Good and bad.

I stop fiddling in my bag and spoke under my breath with the same thought, caught up in the idea. "I'm surprised you still remember." I mumbled to myself.

I can feel his presence and his eyes on me, not exactly sure what his actions are. But his voice speaks up with a small sense of fervor in his tone. Something undeniably him. The tone I always craved since it left me.

"Y/n, you can't tell me you don't call to mind how Ive remembered every single thing I've been blessed to learn about you"

I still my hands from roaming once again after I found my keys. At this point, I don't know what's going on. But as I motion my mouth to find what to say a grand lightning bolt flashed down from the sky, hitting somewhere nearby. Thunder that sounded like an earthquake erupted, immediately pouring heavy rain down with it. With that, we instantaneously saw lampposts shut off. All electricity in the area immediately being gone in an instant.

"Ain't no way" I groaned. I can't believe this. I look around at all of the dark areas surrounding the complex except for the emergency lights powered from the generator. Putting my keys in the door, I heavily sigh opening up my residence.

Slowly walking in to the dim natural light from the blinds I turn around to Onyankopon, standing still at the doorstep, and tell him he can come in.

"Are you sure? My car is all good and everything I can still drive."

"In this storm?" I ask raising my eyebrow. I rolled my eyes, "You not gon get nowhere the way this storm going right now. It's fine. Plus, your place is probably out of electricity too."

He nods, "Well thanks, I really appreciate it" He awkwardly steps into the 3 bedroom apartment. My girls usually have class during this time last I checked so we're the only ones here.

I grab some candles to light across my home hoping for some sort of spark to brighten up the place.

Once I withdrew a breath and looked around, the rooms seemed to be lit up enough comfortably outside of the insanely romantic essence it gave off. I stood up from where I was crouched by the living room table where I made eye contact with him sitting up on the couch.

"Soooo could I get you anything?" I awkwardly stand there and he's just sitting... menacingly.

Ugh who am I kidding he looks so geeked out right now.

"It's honestly fine. Once the storm passes I'll be right out forreal you don't have to go through any trouble." He laughs.

With that in mind I obliged and went to my room setting up my laptop and iPad with my now found Apple Pencil. Since the electricity's gone that means I shouldn't have any distractions on focusing on my work.

"Right y/n, focus on the goal. It don't matter that your ex is in the other room. Get on your zoom!" Mumbling to myself as I type in my username to blackboard to view the rubric.

"What the-"

Shit. Of course blackboard and the wifi is down too if all the electricity is out.

As I groan and leave my room to get a glass of water, I'm getting Ony one too. Seeing him roaming on his phone and placing the glass in front of him on the table I sit on the sofa opposite of him.

He looks up from his phone, "You did not have to do this", he began to grin to himself as he lifted the cup and started to drink.

As I began to speak we both got a notification.

ALL UNIVERSITY STUDENTS: ELECTRICITY IS DOWN ON CAMPUS AND ON AND OFF CAMPUS HOUSING DUE TO A SEVERE WEATHER STORM. MORE UPDATES WILL COME SOON. CURRENTLY, AN ESTIMATION OF 3 HOURS WILL BE NEEDED TO REPAIR DAMAGES TO ELECTRICAL UNITS.

"Fuck" I groaned.

"You're not gonna be able to finish that paper huh?" He questioned.

"No and it's due Sunday. I was hoping to knock it out today before the weekend really starts. I don't need to procrastinate anymore than I already have."

"Oh trust me I remember." He laughed. "I can help yknow. There's nothing else we can do here."

"On what though? Blackboard is down."

"Not google docs or notes app though." He smiled, "As long as you know what you're supposed to write about you're set."

"But I like looking at the rubric when I write to make sure my grades solidified"

"I'm hearing a lot of excuses misses honors student. If you wanted to do it you would at this point. Plus, my specialty is writing papers so I can definitely help"

I remember oh so well. This reminds me of when I procrastinated on a paper last semester the weekend before it was due just like this one and we stayed up till 3 AM writing it. So many laughs and double shot espressos from that time. His specialty really is writing essays and all sorts of papers. That assignment was 5000 words and we started the Saturday and still got an A.

"Shit, why not. It's only 500 words anyway" I joke.

He smiled and we got to work. The first hour went by like nothing. It felt like old times. 200 words were typed but the only thing holding us back was that I actually need to have proper cited sources. Professor Rodriguez do not play around either so it's been a painstaking amount of time trying to find anything with no internet and a on and off personal hotspot.

As Ony and I sit next to each other working on the paper, he lifts up his glass and it accidentally slipped out of his hands onto the table.

"Ah damn I'm so sorry. Let me-"

"No it's cool." I put down my laptop and got up to get a paper towel. When I sat back down and handed the paper towel to him our hands touched again. That once jovial, funny and somewhat relaxed mood we had was now gone. We're exes. This isn't what exes do. We're not friends.

But shit we were . That was exactly what we were like before we started anything or knew there was something there. Even during our relationship we felt just like this at times too. Where the hell did we go? Why did I let us go?

The awkward touch we had became more intimate as I decided to gently grab his hand. The eye contact he made was confused but willing. It spoke "why haven't you done this all this time while I'm right here?" Or at least that's what I think.

Our hands interlocked letting go of the paper towel at this point. Eye contact on something serious as we ask questions to each other with them. As I began to lean down on the couch, Ony couldn't stop staring between my eyes and my lips. He eventually and quickly took the dive, trying not to lose the moment. Embers burned and flowed through the air as he began to shift from my power to his. He embarked on leaning my back onto the couch rather than his. Hands splayed in my locs and taking small breaks to breathe before going back in.

Small moans escape my mouth as he's working me. Kisses pressed on my lips were coming down my chin... then my neck as he suckled on my skin. His hands roamed my body slowly. One on the side of my stomach nearing my ass and the other beginning to feel my breast under my shirt. At this point, he's starting to get more vocal, groaning and whispering sweet nothings along my body.

"You know how much I've missed you y/n. How much I've missed this pretty face... this pretty body... and this pretty pussy" he hissed one kiss after another. "Is this all ok? If you're not fine with this of course I'll stop. Tell me what you want."

His asking for consent was always so sexy and those words... damn I missed him and this.

I looked at his lust blown eyes as he looked up to mine from my stomach as he briefly stopped from going lower and lower.

"I want you Q. I'm all yours." My composure is definitely done at this point. He's got me right now.

"Don't worry. You know I will always take care of you." He slurred, slowly sliding my bottoms and panties down and kissing my inner thighs before locking them in his arms. It's been a while since I've been in this position and I've missed it since forever ago.

Slow pecks from my thighs came closer and closer to the apex of them. He must could tell how nervous I was since his thumbs gently rubbed where they laid at to comfort me. Im in love with the way they feel on me.

"So as you can see I do have some hair ri-"

He side eyed me. "Y/n I'm a grown ass man. You know I like my peaches with some fuzz on it. Now can I have my dinner please?"

He can get so forward like this it's making me shy. I rolled my eyes and laid my head back. I never thought I'd be in this predicament.

"Good girl. Just stay just like that baby."

He nestled his lips on my bundle, wrapping them on to gently suck at a slow and smooth pace. His rhythm was gradually fastening and shortly, his lips unattached from my clit to lap at the bundle once more flicking his tongue. He remembers. He always remembers what I like.

Beginning to close my legs from the sensation, he parts me once again lapping at my cunny fervently. Like some undying need that he can't let go. As a "punishment" for me not taking it, he inserts a finger and then a second to make me break even more than I already am.

I plead and moan, "Ony, baby, I'm leaking"

I can barely control my body now. My breath getting fainter as I breathe heavy.

"Good. You know that's what I want." He keeps pumping. Squelching ensues as he becomes infatuated with his doing. "Look at that shit. All for me huh" He asks looking at my fucked out face.

I disappointedly moan when his fingers leave me but he swipes my essence from its trail and sucks his fingers while maintaining eye contact with me. I whimper and squeeze at the sight.

I guess he wanted to finish the job though. I tried to reach over to slip my hand in his boxers just for him to grab my wrist and pin both of my hands down to finish what he started.

It's always like a switch in him when he's like this. So different from the sweet Onyankopon from everyday that everyone knows. So nasty. I love it. I miss it.

He mischievously watches me. "You feel this?" I moan as he pumps his fingers back in me. I roll my eyes to the back of my head and he chuckles. "I'm gonna take that as a yes. Let me make you cum, princess."

He lowered his head down again as he continued pumping into me. Licking a stripe up my honey and continuing the mess he was creating previously. Languid strokes of his tongue were hitting me just right and my moans started turning to desperate whimpers.

Building me up for a while, he then dipped his muscle into my pussy and interchanging with his fingers, curling them with each stroke. His other hand left my thigh and his thumb began rubbing my clit. Faster and faster he went I started to find my stomach tensing and the air becoming hard to breathe.

In between heavy pants I slip out "O, stop, I'm gonna make a mess!" my eyes rolling to the back of my head and legs lifting and coming together.

He didnt stop and pinned me down pressing on my lower stomach. My moans became octaves higher and higher. He lifted his head from my cunny, "you gon take it and make a mess all over my face. Don't hold back nothing."

With that, he continued his ministrations. My grip on his hair became as tight as it could as I could feel my voice go weak. My legs began to shake as clear liquid lightly sprayed out onto his face and a white ring began to form on his fingers. My pants were beginning to rapidly slow down as I came down from my high, un loosening the death grip I had on his head.

He came back up kissing my cheek then licking my essence off his face and fingers, "Always taste so good." Proceeding to take a rag from my bedroom to clean me up and carrying me to my bed.

Before we even got the chance to speak about what happened, my eyes fell. A nap took over both of us and hours that felt like minutes rolled by.

His arm around me as we slept on our sides felt like old times. Like something right that I just ripped away from my body. It's so comfortable.

After a dream I couldn't remember, I wake up in a daze, looking behind me to see him knocked out and his arm still around my waist.

Gently moving it off of me, I slowly get up and walk to the bathroom.

"Shit I might as well take a shower"

To be honest, none of this has settled in my head yet. My ex boyfriend who I'm clearly not over in my bedroom after being nasty on the couch is sleeping on my bed... crazy. Real fanfiction kind of shit.

Pushing the light switch up, I notice the bulb illuminate the room. Thank the Lord almighty. I put on my shower cap and get in. I feel myself let go of a breath I didn't know I had when the hot water hits my skin.

This is insane. I shouldn't be hooking up with my ex. I cut it off for a reason... I think. It's gotta be this way for the both of us so nobody gets hurt.

"Bitchhhh" I think to myself in the shower holding my head.

Leaving the bathroom with my towel on, I see my ex looking over at me from his phone, arm now holding his head up to stare me up and down in awe.

"It's been a while since I seen this view"

I cut my eyes and stand in front of him on my bed. "Look we need to talk- " and my head turned immediately when I heard the front door of the apartment open. Thankfully, my room doors closed, but my girls walked in the apartment gossiping when they called out my name to have our daily debrief of the day.

I cuss at myself and know they probably see the cups of water, candles, and his shoes at the door as they fell silent. Whispering to themselves with words I couldn't make out, I eventually hear a knock at my door.

I looked at Ony, mortified with a finger to my lips, then took a deep breath, opening the door so they can only see me still in my bath robe.

"Heyyy" I greeted with the awkwardest get out and don't make this weird smile I know.

"Hey mookie, we just wanted to check on you and see if you're good with the electricity going off and everything earlier." One of them said, clearly peeking inside my bedroom to see who's here, eyes widening that it was him before he could move himself. She gave me a look and I gave her one back like we telepathic or something.

"Girl yknow I'm good, just trying to finish this paper" I say hoping she takes the message that I know she's getting from me right now.

"Yeah I'm sure it's realll hard" She said acting like a real smart ass.

With a few more exchanges they go to their rooms to settle down for the night. After hearing both of their doors close I rush back to my room.

"Yeah, you gotta go" picking up his clothes and pushing them to his chest.

"But-"

"Look, I wish there was a better time to talk, but you have to go. This... is strange. We broke up. There's a reason why this ended. I know it was probably stupid of me to let you stay here during the storm, but this wasnt my intention." Pointing at the both of us.

I picked his arm up before he could get a word out to reason with me, clothes just tussled onto his body. If he sweet talks me again I really might not double back this time.

We get to the door and with the least amount of strength he has, he turns his body towards me and gently grabs my hand before I could open the door placing it back by my side.

"Y/n...why are you letting go of us... again? This still doesn't make sense and you know that."

I still. I remember this feeling... this sense of regret. But just like last time, I can't tell if it's the wrong choice or because I don't want to let go.

In truth, Ony feels... familiar. He'll always feel like a memory and I don't want to get too comfortable in his light of nostalgia. He brought such a level of solace in my life that I never wanted to replace. It was even more so after we became official....I don't want to become stagnant because of it. I have my own dreams, my own endeavors, and my own goals that I want to reach. It would be so easy to be a trophy wife to him... and he'd gladly let me. As a woman, I don't want that to be the tell all be all of my life when I know that I had a life before him. I didn't know if I could escape from it then and I definitely don't know now. That's the real reason why I keep shutting him out and probably why we broke up... but he can't know that.

"Because I know we won't end well. We're two different people Ony and this idea that you can just up and think everything is picture perfect for us has to stop now"

He looks in my eyes with such disappointment, then slight anger as his eyebrows pushed together. He opened his mouth to speak again but thought about it and decided not to, closing his eyes in the process. With a heavy huff from his chest, he looked at my eyes one last time for the night before turning away and leaving the complex.

When I shut the door, My girls came out immediately like paparazzi.

"You were over him huh?" One of them snarled at me. "It don't seem that way to me love. Maybe you shouldn't even go to the party tomorrow."

I looked down at the ground and they both took notice of my state. We all went to my bedroom and I explained everything that happened tonight. Their eyes looked at mine with frustration and awe. I held my head knowing their reaction just like they've been telling me for the past 3 months.

"You are not over that boy y/n"

"I think you're confused"

And they're right. I am. But I tell them the same thing I told them every time.

"But when he makes it to the league, what am I going to do? Wag my tail like a dog after him and have niggas tell me that I want his money or that I don't have half his talent for anything like them bitches was saying when we were together? And what if he cheats? He gon have hella girls at his disposable and I'll be feeling stupid like "I really wasted my time on this nigga". Y'all know how much I love Ony and I was just getting over him too. This is for the best for me right now y'all know that"

They gave each other a look and got up to hug me.

"Whatever decision you choose to make girl you know we got you. Just remember to listen to your heart sometimes"

With that, we said our little goodbyes and retired for the night. Ony on my mind, I went to bed.

Waking up, he is still on my mind. Getting my laptop, I tried to continue the paper but had no will power to do so. The whole morning and afternoon felt like that... no volition and all a blur. Wasting away in my bed after the three different times my girls checked up on me throughout the day I just can't escape him. It doesn't help having the daydream engrained of what could've been present with our past. In that same thought, I hear a buzz on my phone, too in tune with the delusional reaction thinking it could be him.

I look at it to see the ticket for the party tonight that one of my girls sent. I groan and get up, finally deciding to start my day and also prepare myself for tonight.

Hype hoochie music is playing on my speaker and I hear Looking For the Hoes again. I'm thinking of how good everything was before all that happened yesterday. Do I even regret it? Am I blocking my blessings?

I can't let a man distract me from my life though. There's a life before and after him and I have to remind myself of that.

Finally finished with my look and it finally being an hour after the party started, me and my girls head out for the wild night we been planning for months.

What I didn't know was that the line would feel like 3 miles long and realizing we need our ID when we're finally 5 feet before the security. Why are parties this complicated? I don't know. But luckily we all at least have pictures of our ID and got in.

When we step foot into the party, the first thing we see is purple lights illuminating the entire venue. People are scattered everywhere and in every other corner we see the Ques barking and hopping to their stroll.

"Lawd have mercy" one of my homegirls say in love with the ques. Me and the other laugh and roll our eyes.

After some time just standing, we decided to find a small table and sit down with our small get ups. Our drinks from the pregame were starting to kick in after 10 minutes and we were laughing our ass off drunk when we hear "Girl the way you move it got me in a trance-", and that was it. All of us pulled each other to the dance floor and start to turn up. I'm throwing ass on my home girl and catching from the other.

I needed this. Seriously. I forgot how fun it is to be outside in the streets. Seconds later, we hear a scream and laugh from a girl and gasp from the crowd. One of the Ques picked up a girl and started acting like he was eating her out.

We all looked at each other with our jaws dropped. Ain't no wayyyyy. They were not lying bout it getting wild.

Right behind where I see the spotlight shining, about 30 feet away, I saw a face I didn't think I'd see at all. Just as his eyes set in on the scene before him he also saw my eyes and we made eye contact for a brief second.

I turned my body so fast that I almost knocked my home girl over. In the middle of her fussing me out she asked what happened. Naturally, I told her that Ony is at the party.

"Why is a nigga at a Que party is the real question though?"

"Girl unimportant can we please move somewhere else"

We all move to a separate section of the party venue. This can not happen. I'm drunk and I been dancing? I can not see or be around that man right now.

Before I could even get the nightmare out my head, I hear a "Y/n" near my head. I turn around mouth slightly agape to see him once again. Even finer in his put together party get up than his athlete clothes from yesterday. My mind all caught up in him just like last time I'm in a blur of what he's actually saying to me.

"Y/n, why are you here right now?" He whispers yells in my ear from the loud music blasting from the speakers.

I look to my left and right and my homegirls dashed off like the road runner... traitors.

Looking at him once again, eyes low from the drink in my system I ask, "Ony, why would it matter to you? I'm not your girl and you not my man. We single. The real question is why you're at a Que party." Remembering what my homegirl had said to bite back at him.

He fixes his face, his tongue poking at the inside of his cheek looking at me clearly frustrated. Just looking at his face he can't leave me alone. Sorry that's just drunk me talking I don't know whats on his mind.

"Y/n, why the hell you been drinking so much? Don't you got a paper to finish?"

"Ony you are not my daddy get up out my face!" I yell at him. "I'm out here having fun with my girls trying to get over YOUR ASS so why can't you just mind yo business!" Oops. My eyes widened, that last part wasn't supposed to come out. Fuck.

Shit, how did he react to that?

Without time for me to look up and see his face or even hear him utter a word, he has my hand in his and leading me somewhere and fast. I'm trying to keep up but it's kind of hard to have good foot and direction coordination in a party like this and off my ass.

With all of the movement feeling like a blur, I found both of us outside of the party venue from some back door. It's slightly raining by the building and the night sky showed a bright orange street light that was our only light source.

He takes off his jacket and puts it over my shoulders to warm me. It's a bit cold. What a gentleman.

"Y/n ... what did you say?"

He stares directly in my eyes with a sense of fervency and hope. One that I can't deny now.

Part 2?

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Authors Note: Hi y'all! I haven’t written fanfic in soooo long but never stopped reading lmao. I loveeee this one so much. It’s Literally the best fic ive done period thus far. I’m trying to think if I should start writing again fr esp for my fictional anime men.

#onyankopon x black y/n #onyankopon smut #onyankapon #aot onyankopon #onyankopon x reader #ony x black reader #aot x reader #aot smut

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george-weasleys-girl · 1 year

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Hii, how are you?

Can I request something from your prompt list? Fred x Ravenclaw, shy and quiet(total opposite of Fred) reader

"I never said I was in love with her!" "Maybe not out loud."

And

"How can I let her know that I worship the ground she walks on, but in, like, a chill way."

Thank you! I love your writing ❤️

Fred x Shy Ravenclaw Reader

~•~

The library is not the place one would think to find Fred Weasley, including Fred himself. The library was for pulling pranks on Filch in the restricted section during the wee hours of the morning, not actual studying. And yet, here he was, chin resting in the palm of his hand, a dreamy gaze on his face, ignoring the open book in front of him. Truthfully, he had no idea what it was about, as he'd grabbed it randomly off a shelf so he could at least appear like he was doing something studious.

"Hey Freddie!" George's voice startled him out of his reverie. "Whatcha up to?" He asked, following his twin's gaze.

"Just, uh, trying to get a bit of studying in," Fred slammed the book closed.

George smirked, picking up the book. "So, what's so engrossing that you forgot we were supposed to start working on our new invention a half hour ago."

Fred looked up at the clock. "Oh shit, sorry Georgie, I must've lost track of time."

"No worries, mate," George said with an absent-minded air, flipping through the book. "An In-Depth Study of Wizarding World Economics. Riveting stuff, no doubt. I can see how time got away from you."

Fred rolled his eyes and snatched the book out of his George's hands before striding out the door. "Are you just going to stand around here wasting time, or are you gonna come help me work on things?"

George chuckled and glanced over at the only reason his twin had graced the library with his presence today. Y/N sat with several other of her fellow Ravenclaws, digging through the mountain of books piled on their table.

Fred had been head over heels for her ever since Professor Sprout paired them up for a project in Herbology. Though he'd never in a million years admit it. George reckoned it was because his twin had no idea how to express himself to someone like Y/N. Most of the time, all Fred would have to do is waggle his eyebrows and give his trademark wink, and girls would be falling all over themselves to get his attention. However, unlike his usual type, Y/N was a shy, quiet bookworm who paid more attention to her newest novel than the flirty overtures of Hogwarts' most notorious prankster and playboy.

~•~

"I think Fred Weasley has a little crush on you," Jess commented as they left the library.

Y/N stared at her friend. "What gives you that crazy idea?"

"Because he barely took his eyes off you the entire time he was in the library."

"Nonsense, he was probably looking at you or Cara. You two are the hottest girls in Ravenclaw."

Jess laughed and nudged Y/N's arm. "I bet you say that to all the girls."

Y/N giggled and shook her head.

"But, in all seriousness," Jess continued. "He was most definitely looking at you and only you."

"Well, even if he was, what am I supposed to do about it?"

"I don't know, talk to him maybe."

Y/N sighed. "You know I have trouble talking to guys."

"Or you could just flash him one of your beautiful smiles," Jess suggested. "At least let him know you're interested. You are interested, right?"

"Yeah, a bit," Y/N looked down to try to hide the heat rising in her cheeks.

~•~

"Hey, are you paying attention?" George asked Fred for the second time in a row.

Fred shook himself. "Of course I'm paying attention."

"Then, what did I just say?"

The older twin crossed his arms. "You asked me if I was paying attention."

George rolled his eyes. "Before that."

"Oh," Fred looked down. "Um..."

"Exactly."

"Dammit, I'm sorry, Georgie. My mind's just somewhere else today."

"Obviously," George replied. "Look, if you're so madly in love with Y/N, why don't you just ask her out."

His twin's eyes went wide. "I never said I was in love with her!"

"Maybe not out loud," George said.

Fred sighed. "Is it that obvious?"

"A blind man could see it, Freddie."

"Great...so the whole school knows?"

"Well, I wouldn't say the whole school," George said. "Just all of Gryffindor and half of Ravenclaw. And maybe a few Hufflepuffs. And probably one or two Slytherin."

"You're not helping," Fred groaned.

"Ok, ok, sorry," George chuckled. "You could just try talking to her, you know."

"Oh gee, why didn't I think about that?"

"I'm serious, mate. Talking to girls is, like, second nature to you."

"Yeah, but Y/N's different. She's not like the other girls I've dated."

"Oh, you mean like the ones I have to peel off of you with a putty knife?" George asked with a bemused grin.

"Well, yeah," Fred grinned. "But it's more than that. She's the first girl that I've ever really liked, you know, like as a girlfriend and not just a fun fling."

"That's a good thing," George said. "All the more reason to talk to her."

"But she's so sweet and shy. I don't want to come on too strong and scare her off or anything." Fred ran his fingers through his hair. "How can I let her know that I worship the ground she walks on, but in, like, a chill way?"

~•~

Today wasn't the first time the twins had skipped school, nor would it be the last. After receiving a bit of birthday money from their great-aunt, they decided a trip to Hogsmede was in order, sneaking off after breakfast. Neither of them expected to run into another Hogwarts student. And they certainly didn't expect that student to be Y/N.

Honeydukes appeared to be empty of customers when they bounded through the door. For the first time in a while, Fred's mind was on something other than Y/N.

"Our pranks are getting a little lackluster," he said, facing George as he walked backward down the aisle. "We need to make them bigger and better." To emphasize his point, Fred threw his arms out wide as they rounded the corner and felt the back of his hand connect with someone's face.

~•~

Y/N didn't skip school often. It was only when the stress of Hogwarts life got too much that she sought the peaceful atmosphere of Hogsmede during its downtime.

With finals looming on the horizon and a massive research paper for Potions due by Friday, she'd barely lifted her nose from the grindstone in the past few weeks. Add to that her friends' relentless teasing over the Fred Weasley situation, and it was enough to make her scream.

Y/N needed a day off. And she took it, arriving at Honeydukes just minutes after it opened.

Less than a half hour later, she sat sprawled on the floor, dazed, her candy strewn around her in every direction as she tried to figure out what in the hell hit her.

"Are you ok?" Fred knelt down beside her. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. I had no idea you were there."

"You're what hit me?" Y/N turned her head to look at him. "And right between the eyes, too."

"It was an accident!" Fred stammered. "I swear I didn't see you. We thought we were the only customers in the place."

"That's true," George confirmed, picking up the scattered sweets. "The place is usually pretty dead during the week."

"Oh-yeah--right. It's ok. It's not all your fault. My mind was a million miles away. I should've been paying more attention," Y/N gave a small smile and moved to stand up. Now that the shock had worn off, her cheeks burned at the thought of how ridiculous she must look right now.

"Here, let me help you," Fred offered his hand. She nodded and let him help her up.

"Thanks," she said, taking her basket of candy from George. "I should go pay for my stuff."

As she turned away, Fred spoke. "Hey, um, could I buy you lunch? As a way to make up for almost knocking you out."

Y/N tried to calm her pounding heart while her mind raced almost too fast for her to keep up. The idea of having lunch with Fred Weasley both terrified and thrilled her. Because despite what she'd said to her friends, she did like Fred. More than she wanted to admit. Secretly, she'd hoped he'd ask her out. But not like this. What even was this? It wasn't a date. Or was it? Were all her friends right? Did he really like her, too? Or was this just a friendly gesture? And besides, what would she even talk about? She wasn't prepared at all. Conversing had been easy during their project. She just kept to the subject matter. But, small talk? She sucked at small talk...

"Y/N? Are you sure you're ok?" Fred stepped toward her. George stood behind him, a concerned look on his face.

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry." The heat rose up in her cheeks again. Dammit.

"I could walk you back to castle if you'd prefer," Fred offered.

As nervous as Y/N was about having lunch with him, it wasn't enough to tempt her to go back to Hogwarts yet. "Um, no, I-I'm ok," she assured him. "Lunch sounds nice."

~•~

"You're the last person I expected to see here today," Fred commented to Y/N while they waited for food at the nearly empty Three Broomsticks.

She gave a sheepish smile and shrugged. "I've been stressing over finals and everything. I needed a break."

"I thought Ravenclaws didn't stress over school," George said.

Y/N almost snorted Butterbeer through her nose. "We stress over school more than anyone else. Why do you think we're studying all the time?"

"She does have a point," Fred agreed, garnering a warm smile from the shy Ravenclaw.

~•~

The sun was setting when Fred and Y/N stood outside Ravenclaw Tower. After spending an afternoon with the infamous Weasley twins, any lingering nerves she had were long gone.

"I had a really fun time today," Y/N said.

"Me too," he grinned. "You know, I was thinking, if you want, we could do this again sometime. Just you and me, though."

"I'd like that a lot."

"Really?! Okay, great!" Fred all but bounced in place. "So, it's a date?"

"Yeah, it's a date," Y/N confirmed, a smile spreading across her face.

~•~

@milivanili99 @fancy-pantaloons @turvi @zvummyummy @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @georgie-weasley @imshiningjustforyou @nighttimemoonlover @jsjcue @wzrd-wheezes @fredweasleyyyyy @hufflepuffie @alexistonks @princess-paramour @anvaaryn @lastwandastan @samshifts @asuperconfusedgirl @superduckmilkshake @mysticsheepsoul @gemofthenight @1lellykins @junerprsh @sierraluvz @wolfkill16

#fred weasley #fred weasley x y/n #fred weasley x you #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fluff #hp universe #hp fandom #harry potter fandom #harry potter universe #weasley twins #george weasley x platonic

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niuniente · 7 months

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Regarding fandoms and comments, I've recently had negative comments that tell me I'm not good and should just quit writing. Well, it worked. I no longer am able to write without it affecting my mental state. People who do the bullying do it to get rid of authors they don't like that doesn't fit their mindset. When does it end? I didn't want it to hurt my mental health and get me to quit, but it did.

People treating each other badly whenever they can never ceases to make me sad.

I try to think the quote "hurt people hurt people" when dealing with negative people. Happy, balanced people, who view others as their equals, have no need to leave negative comments, send hate messages etc. to others just because they can.

Take a little break but don't let anyone stop you from doing what you love! I try to keep this mentality and I always think about how Billy Idol (80's famous singer) just kept pushing forward whenever someone or something said no to him:

When he was a child, he wanted to play a guitar. Parents said "No, you can only play a violin" -> Billy secretly got himself a guitar with 5£ at the age of 9 and learned to play it by himself.

His teenage girlfriend dyed his hair white. Everyone said it looked horrible on him -> Billy kept the white hair and made it his trademark.

He discovered punk and FINALLY managed to put a band together in his late teens. Too bad that London, where he lived, had closed all bars and pubs from punk bands. They weren't legally allowed to play anywhere. -> Billy and a few other guys established their own place for all punk bands, where all where welcome to play.

He went to university to study music. He was bullied and ostracized by other students as he was too weird, too freaky looking and listened to punk instead of jazz -> He was lonely but staid in the school and kept his looks and music taste.

He started to dislike being a band member and wanted to have a solo career. Everyone said you can't make it, you suck, you can't make compose a shit -> Billy decided to start a solo career as Billy Idol anyway.

When he started to get a little footing in the Europe, he decided that he wants to go to USA. It would give him better markets and more chances to succeed. Too bad that Europe's most famous punk band, Sex Pistols, has just epically failed in their attempts to make it in the USA. America hated punk and Billy Idol was nobody compared to Sex Pistols. Everyone called him delusional for having such stupid dreams. -> Billy went to USA anyway

In America, all record labels he went to said the same thing; you will never make it here. You sing punk and we hate it. You sing with British English and we hate it. You look so fucking ugly that no one will come to see you. If you want to succeed here, you need to change your music style for radio friendly stuff, change your accent and change your looks. -> Billy thought that if singing with American accents helps, he does it. Otherwise, fuck you. This is the music he wants to do and this is his style and how he wants to look. -> This decision led him to become super famous. Everyone loved his music and the fucking ugly guy became one of the 80's sex symbols, and his music videos were literally directed to sell with sex to the female audience.

Also, it was told him with dead certainty by many people that your music will never play in radios. EVER. Well, what do you know, his music still plays in the radios, 40 years later :3

So, keep going! Keep writing! There's audience for every single style out there and just because some asshat wasn't impressed, it doesn't mean others wouldn't like your stuff.

I mean, how much emphasis do we want to put into asshats words anyway? Which matters more; some random asshat's feelings or our own joy and inspiration when we do something creative?

#ask niu #creativity

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onlyang3ll · 1 year

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hellooo I adore ur blog and was wondering that since ur requests are open.. can you write about rafe being y/n's first boyfriend - maybe they are back from college but went to the same hs

an: hi hope you enjoy this and my take on this request !!! writing on my phone so bare with me! B nice to me pls i don’t like this but i wanna get some stuff out for you all!!

warnings: mean girls!!! swearing. kissing. not proofread

people would have never assumed little old timid you would ever date big bad rafe cameron. but here we are. first visit back home from college, holding hands walking into the country club.

you and rafe didn’t speak in highschool, didn’t have the same friend group. actually had nothing in common. at least that’s what it felt like at the time. but college changed that. you two had almost every class together.

started studying together because it was easier being from the same place. a sense of familiarity even without being super familiar. rafe was a known d bag to most people. but once you got to know him it was hard not fall head over heels.

“bro when did this happen?” kelce walked up with his hands gesturing to you two, topper was the only friend of rafes that knew of our relationship besides our families.

“bro.. none of your business” rafe mocked him. pulling a chair out at the table his friends sat at, you were quiet anxious because you didn’t hang with this group of people in highschool. they were the ones making fun of you for being a prude or goody two shoes. “sit down, baby” rafe spoke softly.

you took a seat and he sat down in the chair next to you. for a while rafe made small talk with his guy friends, eventually topper got there and he spoke to you more than the others.

topper always said he was so glad rafe found me and that i was the toughest girl out there being able to deal with his shit.

“rafe i didn’t know you were back in town!” some blonde shouted and walked over and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, hugging him. you froze, you didn’t have to deal with girls noticing rafe at college because it was always just you two and your group of friends.

rafe was never a player in your eyes because that wasn’t the rafe you met and got to know. he took the girls arms from around him, and nodded. “yup we decided to come back for the weekend” he pulled your hand into his lap and rubbed it softly with his thumb.

“we?” the girl asked with a dumb founded look on her face. “we. me and my girlfriend” he stated. she glanced over and gave a half ass smile. “oh… i didn’t know you guys were a thing”

you looked at her and gave a fake half smile back, “yup we are a thing. very much a thing” you spoke up, and rafe just smiled at you. “anyways, top i hope to see you at my party later tonight” you let out a small laugh at how quick she was to give her attention to a different guy in the group.

the girl walked away, “hey I’m gonna go to the bathroom” you leaned in speaking softly to rafe. he nodded, “okay baby, I’ll be right here” you give him a soft kiss and head to the restrooms.

“honestly i don’t know what he sees in that freak. I don’t even think she said one word in highschool” you heard a the voice of the girl that was just trying to talk to your boyfriend, and stopped to listen.

“rafe doesn’t date, maybe he is using her for something. would not be the first time he has done that with a girl.” another girl chimed in, and they laughed.

your anxiety spiked. and the rest of the time spent with rafe and his friends you stayed quiet. the girls comments consuming your entire head. you didn’t want to believe that rafe would use you and you wouldn’t lie and say the thought of not being good enough didn’t cross your mind often.

you were some book freak, virgin when you and race got together. he never said things to make you feel insecure but you couldn’t help it.

rafe could tell something was off, I’m his truck on the drive back to his family home where you guys were staying at this weekend and looked over at you. “you okay, bunny?”

you snapped out of your daze and looked at him shaking your head, “I’m fine, just taking in the sights” you smiled. he didn’t buy it, pulling into the driveway he parked. he got out and went over to open your door like always, and you turned to get out but he stood in front of you keeping you in the car. “tell me what’s wrong please?”

you sighed, “i over heard that girl and her friends talking about me..” rafe frowned, “what the hell did those bimbos have to say?” you shook your head, “they just said how you don’t date and that they don’t know what you see in me” you felt a tear fall from your eye and he sighs.

“baby don’t give them your tears, it’s not worth it. they are jealous of you. fuck em” he states matter of factly. you giggle a little at the last thing he said. “you are the only girl for me, i wish i could back in time and make you mine sooner.” he cupped your cheeks and gave your forehead a swift kiss.

“you mean that?” you whispered. “fuck yeah i mean that. you’re it for me baby. like it or not you’re stuck with me” he smiled. “oh wow what a punishment that is” you tease him. “you know when you get sassy it gets me going, and we have dinner with my parents in ten minutes so hold off on that missy” he helps you out of his truck.

“yes sir,” you wave your hand at him playfully. “that does too” he jokes, and taps your bum gently. “let’s go before i keep you to myself for the rest of the night”

#drew starkey #drew starkey imagine #drew starkey smut #drew starkey blurb #rafe cameron #drew starkey fic #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron fic #obx

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quietmoonwitch · 3 months

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Complex Witch Stuff & Dealing with a Legitimate Curse

I won't write a very long post. (Edit: I guess the post was long after all—could have been even longer.) This is more of a status update. Someone with whom I talk fairly regularly on this platform wrote to me yesterday with, "Where've you been?" My short answer was, "I'll write a post about it."

My longer answer here is, "I live in a community where there are a number of experienced magical practitioners." Make that, "a number of unhinged experienced magical practitioners." And there are at least two or three I'd describe as "crazier than a loon." One of these crazies has laid down a serious curse on me. I have socially and magically verified it. And most of my energy for the past two weeks has gone towards mitigating its effects.

Most witches and sorcerers have 90% online magical personas (unless they're in IRL covens). So someone cursing them has to work through the lines of connection provided by the internet at best. But effective cursing is complex and a curse can work just fine at a distance (especially if it has a strong spiritual intelligence behind it and isn't just a burst of hateful energy). Apart from online, there are even fewer barriers to laying down work on someone.

I often regret exiting the broom closet and becoming known IRL, especially by these local suburban witches, many of whom have enough time, disposable income, and life-frustration to want to mess with others. It also doesn't help that I'm a guy who pretty much keeps to himself but who radiates a lot of "big energy," for lack of a less new age term. It makes me a target for bitter former coven witches.

I could write a long essay about the situation, but I said I'd keep it short. So this is what's up:

I've been in a local coven for a couple years (and have been practicing the craft for about two decades). My background is in traditional craft and folk work, but I've also studied ceremonial magic and been part of several serious IRL magical groups.

Recently, the coven broke up. One guy moved to France and fell out of communication with us. Another woman, who was obsessed with the (married) High Priest, had a breakdown. She decided to go back to her evangelical Christian denomination and reacquire Jesus as her personal savior. She also won't speak to any of us. "Whatever," I recently said to a mutual acquaintance, "I always thought she was a little nutty." Because she was and really didn't have much magic beyond all the seduction work she was putting in on the HP.

There were 13 of us. Most either drifted away or just stopped coming to meetings. The High Priestess and High Priest (married for 10 years and not trying to run a sex cult, despite the schemes of the various unhappy middle-aged ladies in our group) have an open-door policy and a few of us still show up fairly regularly to meditate and have something like a potluck plus discussion, which is largely what we did as a coven. In a sense, we're still a coven. We just stopped calling ourselves that.

Another suburban housewife, who was sort of going through a second adolescence, competing with the now-relapsed evangelical (mentioned in #2 above) for the HP's attention, got extremely pissed off at everyone (for reasons I had to discover through divination, no less). Let's call her "Angry Witch." AW cursed (a) the entire coven; (b) a close friend; and (c) me because she thought we'd banded together with Ye Relapsed Evangelical to help her get the High Priest away from his wife. That was some crazy, squirrly, irrational shit. But such is the foundation of many curses. Think: aged Mean Girl with enough power and knowledge to be a problem.

So AW put some fairly heavy curse work in and my friend got sick. I realized what was happening and got it off me. So did the High Priest and Priestess (I should say "former," but I like them and still think of them that way). Then we met and compared notes. All of the remaining members of the coven in contact with us were either ill, suffering from extreme runs of bad luck, or (in one case) in the hospital from a freak job site accident.

The HPs and I did a reversal. AW subsequently had a cancer scare, which then was found to be benign. How do we know? She flat-out accused us of sending the Big C in her direction. We hadn't. But we had worked a potent reversal. So if she sent something that nasty at us (she did), it made sense. She tried a few more nasty curse things. All was returned to her.

Finally, she went out and hired a conjure worker to do killing work on four of us. She didn't try to hide it and was feeling very smug. Right now, I am still dealing with the implications and repercussions of that.

Baby Witches of Ye #Witchblr, here are a few takeaways:

Covens can be wonderful, but they can also be like dysfunctional high school cliques full of adults going through a second puberty. Keep that in mind.

Give an emotionally unstable person a tiny bit of power and they will most likely use it for the worst reasons.

This is just a general observation (not a witch-specific one): when middle-aged people fall for someone to the point at which they're ready to burn their own marriage / domestic situation to the ground, they're already a bit out of their minds. When the person they're falling for happens to be happily married and content, you can add bitterness and jealousy to that. When they get rejected and humiliated and know how to work curses, well, guess what happens . . .

Curse work, when done right, can last for a really long time, can be lethal (not just a depressing pain in the ass), and can be hard to remove, especially if it's layered in multiple ways.

So I've been busy, I guess. Stay healthy, my friends, and remember: you don't know what other people know, how experienced in sorcery and the craft they may be. Even an idiot in other ways can lay down powerful work if they're experienced and angry enough. And there are more magical practitioners (and magical thinkers) in the world than society likes to acknowledge. Be respectful to everyone. And only come out of the broom closet to people you trust.

#witch #witchblr #cursed #witchcraft #witch community

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spearheadrampancy · 4 months

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So... if you don't mind me asking how've you been?

hoo boy. yeah. tldr: alive!

quite a fair chunk of shit happened i think. when i redownloaded the app i weighed up if i was gonna make a post abt what's happened, but ultimately decided against it bc i wasnt sure how active i was gonna be. looks like the answer is very, so i might as well for anyone who's curious (:

on with the details in no particular order!

just before we stopped posting, we mentioned how the company we worked for announced big profits, an expenses-paid trip for the top employees, and also the tiny small news that the team we were on was getting downsized from 20 ppl total to about 3 (6 to 1 for my role specifically). well, we did end up losing our job completely because the company was unwilling to make reasonable adjustments so we could move to the same role in a different team (we don't have any legal grounds to take action unfortunately). but this was fine for us bc we grew jaded with how management was doing shit anyway. they also laid off about 700 people from across the company a few months later.

we spent months trying to find a job, and eventually applied to university on a whim. we got in! we're studying game design and are currently in foundation year (level 0) of the course. we were pretty worried about "fitting in" and suff but honestly we made friends instantly and it turns out a lot of lgbt autistic folks are studying game design foundation year. strange! (/s). its a little weird being part of the popular clique now.

we built a site. a real one! with colours and scripts and all that! a couple sites, actually, but only one is what we're comfortable sharing publicly (other site is sys member info for friends to reference). the site is on neocities, available here. we got really into coding for realsies around the time that we stopped posting. we also got into something called choicescript, but the site took priority as we use it as a digital portfolio. we also started practicing API work by making little tools for the discord bot pluralkit, but they are. uh. far from finished

we got an rgb bulb that actually works with shortcuts, so it inspired us to actually code shortcuts again. they're pretty advanced now; we have a series of them dedicated to forcing us to sleep (it obviously isnt working given i'm still awake at 4am !!), but they're really smooth and helpful

we started drawing properly again (i know we've posted a lot of art on here but most of it is low effort memes. and also none of it was trad art, which we got back into), in order to prep for being asked for a portfolio for uni. which we eventually didnt even get asked for. we opened an instagram account to post it to while we work on getting our art on our actual site, and recently a deviantart account for crossposting.

i stopped writing. i also largely stopped building on my ideas for games and comics and such. this was more because i had More Pressing Things to be writing about, like our CV, and our applications, but i havent really picked it back up. in a bit of a plateau of inspiration rn. wanna fix that though.

we started playing hotline miami, which we'd been meaning to do for years. completed the first, got halfway into the second before a TERRIBLE AWFUL THUMB INJURY (dramatic. didnt even need glue) rendered us entirely unable to use a controller. it healed but we havent finished the second yet. today's actually the first time since august that we've even touched a controller, let alone played any games.

we got back into making music. we decided the system was going to start releasing music as a collective, so we set up a whole youtube channel and stuff for it. videos'll start january 1st, we hope.

i convinced two people to watch red vs blue. my token cishet guy friend who was my colleague at Shitty Workplace (i sent him slutty locus from earlier and his only response was "amazing") and one of my new uni friends (very autistic i think they will go feral for it). token cishet just finished season 8 and uni friend is in season 3 i believe.

health wise has been. a ride... our normal gp stopped practicing entirely, and we dont trust the other gp's at our clinic, so we've been entirely unmedicated and unchecked since november of last year, barring OTC stuff. except for the part where at the end of october we finally saw a rheumatologist (after being referred in 2019!) who said we probably had fibromyalgia. earlier this month we also caught some Mystery Illness that lasted two weeks and nobody knew what it was. our voice still hasnt recovered fully and the whole experience was weird, but the hospital nurse wasnt concerned and it didnt come back as positive for That One Illness That Got Really Popular In The Last Three Years so its honestly likely that it was just the regular old flu, which we werent used to after only really suffering from Disabled Person Sicknesses for the best part of the last 15 years.

we met steve downes and jen taylor, the voice actors of halo's master chief and cortana! got photos & signatures (: steve complimented my jacket and jen Really Wanted A Nap.

WE GOT THE GRIFBALL PLUSH (: i would make this bigger if i could. it's just one of those Material Gains that has a lot of sentimental value to us. and i found my glow in the dark ring which i cried about. again: material gains of high personal significance.

so yeah! a lot. im probably missing something because i have the brain of a sieve. but we're alive and thats the important part.

#srs09:m:haix #i know this is a long one but hopefully that readmore works ‼️‼️#srs09:t:looking up #its good to be reminded that my presence on this bitch of an earth means something to someone. id like to hold onto that feeling forever.

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first-only · 1 year

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i'll probably regret asking since league of legends is known to be Not Good™ but now i'm curious. how is light and darkness treated in league of legends lore? (i've seen arcane but apart from that i know nothing)

(referring to this post and my tags on it)

ok so to answer this first a glimpse into what even "league of legends lore" is, as in the material principle of it. Best part of the entire ordeal is that literally nobody cares about league lore. The dudebros playing dont even know it, it has no active fandom (in the definition of tumblr/ao3 of 'fandom'), there's little cancelling, barely analysis, it's free. Which is great!! bc the authors took this to mean they can do literally whatever they want without scrutiny (or w very little of it) from either side. And they did good, oh did they do good. There's been gay characters since the beginning. There are /so many/ now. There's a trans character! She is referenced as such in-game and her bio tells her writing process and decisions! there's no drama over that! bc nobody knows despite all that lol. And im actually grateful for league's natural toxic defense systems because even the boom of arcane did not get the toxic fandom culture into scrutinizing and nitpicking. in short, there's like 5 of us who care abt this shit.

now the way league lore is conveyed is infinitely better than any other franchise with similar storytelling (looking at u overwatch). it's compact, the company actually puts it all in one official place, there's no word-of-god-ing whats canon is clear. side projects are easily referenced and accessible. did you know one of the trailers for the card game in the same universe kinda gives a hint as to the future of one of the main arcane charas? you could go look at it! (or ask for a link/explanation id be happy to). now, the way we learn about the universe beyound the explicitly shared things about regions and factions (and oh lord there's /so many/ of those - arcane was set in its specific regions because they were underdeveloped before!! imagine how the others are); is through the characters themselves and their personal lore. everyone has at least one (and usually many more + videos and stuff) short stories that explain their origin, connection to other characters, strives and moral dilemmas and relation to their faction and/or region. so we get to learn from a first-person account and. well. there's 162 characters to date. yeh that's /a lot of lore/.

And there's more!! The skins in the game, and especially the skin lines (ie skins for different champions with the same theme) are /canon/. Well, they're AU, in the sense of "what if this character was from this other faction/region/nation instead?" or "what if X had happened in this universe instead?" but the lore behind them is solid and applicable. So from all this we have learned a few things about the universe:

-The world they live in, Runeterra, is technically a "planet", but the universe itself is /definitely/ not like ours. It's not the kind of space we see in our physics and studies. It's a magical world! It's filled with beasts and mythological concepts, not hard mathematics and logic. Which is to say the 'void' of space is, in fact, a place for magical creatures to live! It's alive! it's livable, no concept of oxygen, it's travellable (with the right technology and/or magic to get there). The stars are little creatures that sometimes get lost or weak and 'fall' to Runeterra! there's a whole ass faction devoted to helping them grow and get back up. There's space dragons and 'gods' (which is a complicated concept in this universe but to abbreviate here lets call them that) that /create/ those lil guys!

Look at them!

those lil beasties ARE the stars! being shepherded! The darkness of the night sky is alive! its full of tiny creatures and scary space dragons and adventure and benevolent or mischievous celestials! (girl with the horn is one of them!)

-There /is/ a concept of the actual Void, which is a different... spacetime? Sure let's go with that. It's all consuming, the threat to all living beings, on Runeterra and beyound. It's looking to eat and consume everything, ever expanding. Some characters dont believe it even exists (its kinda on a cooldown, waking up atm); others devote their lives and turn into villains to protect the world from it. The kicker? Not only is it /alive/ itself, made of undulating flesh, but all its monsters and messengers are grabbing hands looking to grapple and drown the world as we know it inside of themselves. It's True Darkness, alive and breathing and looking to Consume.

-the concept of light is a little bit different. it's treated as good and righteous by some factions and characters, as blinding by others. the biggest fans of it, as it were, are however the nation that looks to purge everything unclean and magical, to subdue mages and any expression of things non-physical. their battlecries are 'for the light' (which is often called out by other charas as /magical itself/ ironically lol), as they slaughter and purge the lives they deem unnecessary, leaving the emptiness magic leaves behind it as a remnant. ofc this isnt as clear cut a moral lesson - the lore loves its ambiguity. an angel splits in two (simplifying lol) to 'righteous justice' (=light, punishment, purging) and 'compassionate justice' (=dark, support, helping humans with what they need so they would be kinder). the star shepherding region itself is split in sun and moon warriors. protectors of supposed invasions, shields of the light that let nothing in. and nighttime secretive warriors who do what they can to improve the lives of the little guys, who want to fill the sky and the earth with (moon)light - reflected and thus gentler, subtler, /fuller/. and the leaders of these factions are lesbian lovers who were sisters in the old lore 👀

and honestly thats not even my fav part of league lore lol. the political intrigue, characters seemingly crafted to suit me personally. there's ninja-likes who move in smoke and darkness to preserve peace, opposed by light-shining spirit walkers who seek complacency, control, subjugation! you know i never thought /too/ much abt the whole way it treats lightness vs darkness apart from the more obvious space and void faction, but damn the more i dig into it, the more obvious it is this seems like an intentional thing. there's a shining sun emperor and his servants literally made of light(ning), who created creatures called Darkin in their hubris, and who are being opposed by underground factions clad in black. damn.

(for the record league lore got a rewritten some years ago - before, the game was actually canon and the characters were competing to win the League of Legends in-lore for an ultimate price. since, the writers have decided that the characters tell stories that cannot be contained in those limits, and have turned the game into just a backdrop [it and most other games in the same universe] for the bigger story they're telling in the background. i did grumble abt the decision at the time, but now i see that it's taking a very interesting path and i love following it)

#ask #arguably league being Not Good тм is what is saving and preserving its goodness lol #sorry for the essay and thank you for giving me reason to rant about this oh my god #i love this universe so muchhh

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spideyskrunkly · 2 years

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Death's Work of Art (Ch. 2)

Criminal Case Fanfic (fanmade case)

Characters: GPD, suspects

Warnings (for the chapter): Child death, swearing, mentions of toxic relationships and sex, someone gets shot

With new information, Jones and June have a feeling that this is going to turn into a soap opera.

"WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK?! A child?!" June couldn't look without feeling like his heart sank. He hated when dead children are mentioned.

"Yes. A child. That belonged to your victim. And unfortunately, it seems like she didn't have a choice to live the rest of her life." Grace looked away with some heartbreak in her eyes. "Sarah was 9 years old. In her profile, it seemed like she loved writing poems. Like, deep poems. Here's one of them that made me feel... empty." She pulled out the printed document.

Till I see the storm

I am one, I am happy

No sad shall come yet

Tears were forming in Jones's eyes, but he tried his best and successfully choked it in. "A... haiku. 5,7,5 poem."

Grace put the document down. "Correct. Unfortunately, how she died was not determined."

June couldn't help but start feeling empty either. "We should have a talk with one of our suspect. Diana said she was the victim's ex. She must have known something about the kid. Maybe we can-"

"June!" Ramirez ran into the room. "I've found some stuff about your victim! It's- woah, is Jones okay?"

Shit. June didn't even realize David was on the verge of breaking down. He immediately patted him on the back and squeezed his hand to calm him down. "He just needs a minute. What is it, Ray?"

Ramirez felt a little upset for Jones, but shook it off. "Your victim was last seen with someone at a restaurant. I got records of his last location before the murder."

"Cool. While we're over there, can you list of any of our suspects have a dog? Not a cat, not a fish. Just a dog."

"Can do!" And with that, Ramirez was away.

Grace headed back to her studies, leaving the two men alone.

"Hey, man, you okay?"

...

"I hate child deaths too. But for this case, we gotta have some strength to find Jeffrey's killer."

"...right. ...sorry."

"Hey, it's fine. These, these things happen and I would never wanna deal with this bullshit. But, I'll tell you what. If we finish this case, I'll get us some bakeries or something to do that's relaxing so that way we can put this case behind us."

Jones had it in him to calm down "...Okay. Let's do this."

Jones and June went separate ways again. June went to the restaurant, Jones went to see Diana.

A knock on the door again. Diana opens the door.

"Hello, Diana. I'm another officer of GPD and I have a question about it."

"I already told your other guy, I don't care about the prick, he did drugs all day, he's a whore who died brutally!" She was about to slam the door on him, but he caught it with his boot.

"It's about your- fuck, ow- ex's child. Her name was Sarah."

Silence filled the air until Diana swung in the door and dragged Jones in.

"HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT MY DAUGHTER."

"Relax we- wait, SHE'S YOUR KID?!"

"ANSWER ME." Diana started gritting her teeth.

"We can't say much, but this might be connected to her dad's murder. Please, just tell us what you know."

Diana calmed down and lets Jones go out of her grasp.

"My baby girl..." Diana held her head against her face. "She was... the sweetest bee of the hive. She would always be the most caring kid. But Jeffrey couldn't give two rats ass about her. And until she... left, he only acted like he cared about her just to collect the insurance money for when she died. He only cared... about himself... and that FUCKING SLUT!"

She grabbed a box of papers on what seemed to be like read mail and threw it to the other side of the room. She then panted out of anger and started have wilting knees lead her and her tears to the floor.

Jones couldn't help but feel bad and decided to comfort her by hugging her.

"Ma'am, I know this is gonna be hard, but do you have any idea who he was having an affair with?"

".. his name is Rupert Fenton."

"Details?"

"Look for the ugliest, dumbest blonde dude with blue eyes. He should be in that $2 dog skin he calls a suit. And he's a slobbery little bitch, so be careful about the saliva."

"Thank you, Ms. Wu. I know how hard this is and I appreciate it. I won't bother you anymore." Jones let her go and headed to the door.

"Wait. Before you go."

Jones turned around.

"Tell his killer that I said 'Thank You.'"

"... I'll try."

Meanwhile, June looked around the restaurant for clues.

He found a certificate that seemed ripped.

"Let me just..." he pulled out his tape and peices it to find a food-proved certificate that belonged to two people. Jeffrey Simmons and...

"Elanor Blues? Isn't she one of the restaurant workers here?" June decided to go inside.

"Hello!" June called into the place. "Is there a Elanor Blues in here?"

"Here!" A lady with blue gloves and grey hair came in. "I'm Elanor Blues, one of the greatest chefs in this fine restaurant! Some of the greatest food you can find out there, but here is a grat start!"

"... Nice. I'm not hungry. I'm Captain June and I have questions for you about a certain Jeffrey Simmons."

"Ah. Him." Elanor scratched her head. "I told him stealing our crops was a bad idea."

"... I'm gonna go ahead and ignore that. He was decapitated this morning."

"Oh! Wow, now I feel kinda bad."

"Do you have any information that could help us about the murder? Or about his time here?"

"Jeffrey didn't really like being here. He actually has visited a couple times to vent to me."

"I found this certificate outside." He holds it up.

"That. That. He and I were partners for a cooking competition to have a promotion. We didn't win any prizes, but we got certificates for our efforts. But he was all butthurt and quitted his job here. Man, I'm sure gonna miss his rambling."

Back to Jones, he manages to find this Rupert Fenton. And boy, Diana was right; he seems like an asshole.

"Hello, Mr. Fenton, if I may have some of your time-"

"It's Rupert to you. You may now speak, you have 3 minutes."

Yep. An asshole.

"I'm Inspector Jones and I'm here about Jeffrey Simmons. Were you aware that Diana and Jeffrey were dating and... had a kid?"

"Yes I was. No, I don't really care. 2 minutes left!"

One minute can't go that fast!

"Have you had any recent conversation or anything with Jeffrey recently?"

"He comes to me all the time! And in most cases, comes ON me."

"Oh, brother."

"What we have is way more special than him and his other girl had. She was honestly too... sad to be with him. And he would love to make art. He would give me little drawings and- well, that's two minutes, tata, Inspector!"

What?! Time couldn't be up?!

"Wait! I'm not-"

"Time to go!"

Then Jones got pissed and lost it. He wasn't gonna say it, but damnit, Rupert just had to push him.

"BITCH YOUR FUCKING SEX MOBILE IS DEAD, THAT'S WHY I'M HERE!!!!!"

Rupert was too stunned to speak.

"M. My. My Jeffrey is dead?! I.- NOOOOO!"

Rupert started wailing with tears. Jones started to feel bad a little, but he was still pissy.

"Rupert, if you could-"

"GET. OUT. YOU STUPID OFFICERS, YOU COULDN'T SAVE HIM! LIKE HOW YOU NEVER SAVE ANYONE!"

"Fine."

Evening brought June and Jones together again.

A pissed off Jones was pacing around the office while June was putting everything together.

"So, Diana is the mother, Rupert was the side peice and Elanor was someone that Jeffrey depended on. Man, excluding Rupert, most of our suspects so far have no chill sharing hate for Jeffrey. I don't know, you always have the most assumptions, what do you think Jones?"

"FUCK- fuck, idk man, I'm sorry, it's just- I don't wanna deal with Rupert again. He was such an asshole, I was trying so hard to not snap. No wonder Diana hated him!"

"So I'm gonna go ahead and assume you hate Rupert the most." June thought for a second. "Maybe we should go back to the beach and see if there's anything we missed."

June and Jones investigate the beach to find clues.

"I found a box! It has our victim's name on it!" Jones called out to June.

June searched through the shack. "I found a Coffee cake in his shack! We should send this to Grace."

"Yeah, let's look through the box first." June and Jones open the box to find-

"OH SHIT!"

They found the FUCKING HEAD! AND A HATCHET!

"We need to send the head to Nathan!"

"And the hatchet is in here too." June looked up to Jones. "Well, we found our murder weapon for fucking sure! We should just give the whole box to him."

Nathan calls June to the room. Just June. Jones went to see Grace.

"Well, this is definitely your murder weapon." Nathan talked to June about the box.

"Lovely!.... What about the head?"

"Well, buckle up, you're in for a real treat. The head was cut off alive."

"... nice."

"Yeah. Not only that, I found red hair on the hatchet. And now it's obvious that Jeffrey doesn't have red hair."

"So our killer has red hair! Thanks, Nathan!"

"Our killer-"

"Eats coffee cakes!"

"Has red hair!"

June wrote this in his profile as Jones jumped with joy.

"We're so close, I can feel it!"

"Just one more and that killer's gonna-"

BANG!

Glass broke. Bullet fired.

"SHIT!"

Jones took a head cover in case anything else happened.

"... Is... is everything clear, June?"

No response.

"J- June?"

THUD!

Jones looks behind the counter and found June lying on the floor, bleeding from his chest.

"JUNE!"

June was scared. And... getting... tired...

"J- Davi...."

"June, you're gonna be okay! HELP ME! CHIEF! RAMIREZ! NATHAN, ANYONE! JUNE! STAY AWAKE! STAY! JUNE! JUNE!!!!"

Ch2 End

#criminal case #death's work of art #grimsborough #david jeremiah jones #june shiloh #eduardo ramirez #nathan pandit #cc suspect

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lilac1013 · 1 year

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you know idk if this has anything to do with mental disorders but sometimes i get really terrified to sleep and tonight, it has hit really hard and many thoughts are running through my head rn and i truly don’t even know where to start. i have so much to get off my chest and trust me, it’s a LOT. stuff that i wish i could open up to people about but i just know that the moment that i open my mouth, my feelings will be invalidated and that i would sound stupid and pathetic and i just cba to be made to feel worse about myself. honestly i cannot remember if friends follow this blog or if people know about this blog or not and if friends do follow this blog, i cannot remember if they actually use tumblr but if we are friends and you are reading this, actually scroll past and if you do read this anyway then just don’t acknowledge this in any way shape or form. again, there is so much i want to say but i don’t actually know how to put it into words. if anything this is a proper word vomit from my brain where im actuallly writing what is coming from my brain. gosh, if only i had that motivation when it came to my studies which is a huge major stress right now because i just want to graduate so bad with a decent grade and also be so good at korean that i am nearly fluent but idk. everyone around me makes me feel so dumb like it is how they are so naturally good at everything and it’s truly like “oh wow” but people also do this thing where when i explain something, they look at me with these eyes of “that is so stupid but ok” and it’s so off putting. it really does put me off of ever speaking my mind and just makes me feel so dumb and little. which speaking of dumb and little, i hate how no one is straightfoward with me from friends to random people on the internet whose love and validation i seek for. like i want people to straight up be like “beth, this hurt btw can you not” or “beth this made me feel xyz” or “beth i feel like xyz towards you” “beth i mean this”. stop speaking to me in fucking code or some actions like no. i don’t get it and i don’t understand. which leads me to something of i think i am falling for a guy who is literally on the side of the world and who i know has no feeling towards me whatsoever because i am truly the most disgusting thing to ever grace this earth and i just need to lose so much weight so bad and i hate how hungry i am these days and how i keep going over 500kcal a day and i hate how much food stresses me out but i hate how i have no control of myself that the moment i think about food, i want to have it. i hate how mentally hungry i have been and it has gotten to the point where every single day i am so close to you know ...... i hate that my ex made me feel this insecure, this unsure, this scared of people and relationships. i hate how i am not over our relationship despite it being a year and everyone getting tired of hearing about it and how much it fucked me up but i hate how they don’t take me seriously on when i begin to express how much it has fucked me up and i hate how i cannot express that i cannot do things like unfollow them on instagram because even to this day, i am scared of their reaction towards it and i know i should not care but i cannot help the fact that i do. i hate the fact that i am still going through my ptsd shit and i cannot get my shit together for the god damn life of me. i hate the fact that i still cut myself despite saying to myself that i would stop in january 2021. i still do it and little do people know that i did it in korea too. i just cannot stop. i hate the fact that these days i just get urges to literally kill myself whether that is overdosing once again or grabbing my kitchen knife and slicing my throat which i had such an incredible urge to do the night that i truly scared myself that i was going to do it and punching up the mirror into shatters. truly it sometimes feels like someone else is inside me who is just so angry, so upset that all she wants to do is self destruct. it’s terrifying. i just hate how im not good enough and that apparently my actions are never good enough to friends, family and even to strangers who deem im fuckable ( looool an experience to fuck a fat girl is what they want ) but never loveable. literally there is no where in my life where i am deemed good enough. im tired. i just hate myself and just hate eveything about it. i just want to heal but no one ever tells you how to and what anyone has ever told me about healing has just fucked me off. and i think deep down i dont want people to give me solutions or to tell me to move on and that it is okay because it is the past or to be confident and just believe in myself. i want someone to actually sit there and listen. you truly do not need to say shit. i just want you to listen to what i have to say and just acknowledge it and just maybe go “you are doing well though beth and we are proud of you” then we laugh over something stupid. i just want to be heard and reassured. idk. tbh that is very selfish thinking and everything that i have written in this post is selfish and very me me me and you hurt me and im not acknowledging anyone else’s feelings in which i truly am sorry and i am trying my hardest to not be a selfish person like i know that it doesn’t seem or sound like it but i am. i truly truly truly truly truly truly truly truly am and i probably should go to sleep and just try to find some peace of mind

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88m33 · 2 years

Text

Life (from, like, the start of the semester to now) Update

Hi. It's, uh, been a while? I was rereading diary posts from my manic episode and it's really funny to see it gradually get worse until I got away with crimes and crashed. I figured I should probably update you guys on my life since then because stuff has happened but I didn't have a whole lot of time to write about it. I have time now, so I might as well.

My life has been a lot of school and work and extracurriculars and just super fucking busy. It was probably good for a while, but this depressive episode might make things more difficult.

I study international business management--how is that different than normal business management? There's nothing different about it, I just have to suffer through the French classes I signed up for. I'm finally getting into interesting classes: international management, marketing, communication, and economics. And then there's human resources management. Gross. Other than that one, I love my classes and they are so much fun. More about my economics class to come later.

I'm in a pre-law fraternity now. We do general meetings with current law students or admissions officers or lawyers in town every other week and the other weeks we do LSAT prep exercises as a group. It's taking a little longer than I had hoped to get to know everybody because the majority of the members that attend are quite introverted and therefore I feel uncomfortable talking out. But the president of the fraternity and I talked for a good while about work and I'm funny, so humor helps break the ice. I think we're going to do a picnic and/or dinner somewhere in town here pretty soon, so we'll see how much better my social life looks after that. More of pre-law frat to come later as well (these all connect, you'll see).

I'm also an intern for the student government! "I thought you weren't interested in stuff like student government in high school?" Yeah, well I never thought I'd be in three pre-professional fraternities and going to law school either, but hey here we are. I wanted legal experience I could put on a resume for school and the lawyer I spoke to said he did student government in college, so that's what I'm doing. I work under the Attorney General of our student government and it's been great. We're starting a project here pretty soon about getting the honors college a couple of senate seats since they have a dean now. I also ran a phenomenal table last night for our Halloween event: it was a donut-eating contest where I strung up six to nine donuts on strings and if they could eat it without touching it with their hands, dropping it, and in under a minute, they won a pumpkin and a carving kit. It was a hit and people loved it. I had so much fun leading it and talking to people. It was a great time. More on the internship later (trust me, people).

Work is fun but they don't pay me shit. I pay full tuition now because my parents make just barely too much money to qualify for scholarships, so I've been paying through a payment plan. Sadly, I don't make enough to save anything. I think I make about $1200 a month and have to pay over $1400 a month for tuition, so I'm still taking it out of my savings. It's one of the most anxiety-inducing things ever. It doesn't help that my parents are like, "Oh yeah don't forget that you're moving out next spring to a city where rent is at least $2100 a month" and I'm sitting here with $700 in my bank account. So I've been looking for a new job or a second job but I don't want to just work in a warehouse because it looks bad on my resume to go from a job in my field (though indirectly) to a "whatever" job. If I'm going to look for a new job, I want something with a stable schedule, better pay, and looks really good on my resume. I think I'm going to spend next Wednesday going around the law firms in town with a shit ton of resumes and handing them out like Halloween candy.

So, how do economics, pre-law fraternity, and my internship all come together? They all have one person in common: we'll call him The Senator. When I first saw this man, my exact thoughts were, "That is the most arrogant fucking face I have ever seen". Quickly followed by, "It's kind of pretty". The Senator is in my comparative economics class and I think he's friends with the professor's son or something. He's in my pre-law fraternity and wants to go into big law (which is basically just being a lawyer for the government). He's a senator for the legislative branch of the student government. He's also the senator working on my honors college project with the Attorney General. I literally cannot escape this man. I'm not actually complaining--it just seems extremely convenient that this ambitious, attractive man with similar goals and aspirations is constantly around me. Almost like the universe was like, "Sorry, honey, you don't get a choice, this is the one".

At first, The Senator was just, like, always in the background? Like he was there being fucking pretty and I just had to deal with it in my spot in the row behind him in class. And then a kid from one of my summer classes who I had become sort-of-friends with stole my spot. I mean I don't blame him. I was late to class and it's a really great spot. The problem was that the other spots in that row were taken. I was forced to move to The Senator's row. Suddenly I wasn't observing from the row behind--I was sitting four seats away from him.

Oh don't worry, it doesn't stop there. I was in a meeting with the Attorney General and his other intern when the honors college project was brought up and we were told that The Senator was going to be working on it with us. And guess who walks into the Starbucks? Yeah, you guessed correctly. So the Attorney General waves him over and we do official introductions and this man says, "You followed me on Instagram?" Which I did. Which means he also saw the slutty Ghostface costume I made for a party. Of course, I owned it and said yes. He then says he's going to the pre-law fraternity meeting for LSAT prep (which he doesn't usually come to because I've been to every single one, I'd know). And then he leaves.

And so I go to the pre-law fraternity meeting. No one is there yet but the president. We chat about work and school as people trickle in and then The Senator walks in and sits down next to me. He's making jokes all night and looks at me every time he does. Like turns 90 degrees in his chair to look at me. I say an answer and he says that he agrees with me and Jesus Christ the way he says my name. I will never recover. And then everyone leaves.

We have economics the next day. I'm sitting in The Senator's row again because I can't get my seat back at this point, so when The Senator goes to sit down, he looks down and like smiles/smirks at me and glances at me through the class. But we don't talk because four seats are too far away. We go through the same routine in the next class. For the Halloween event, he comes up and asks me what the hell is happening and I explain it to him and that's it because he has his own table to run.

It's much more difficult to have a crush when they know you exist. Like, I was okay when I was just some person who was just everywhere, but now I'm a real person to him. I don't know. It might be this depressive episode messing with my brain about this and you can read more about that in my last post about it.

And yeah, that's been my life. Have a good one, folks.

#tumblr diary #crush #school #university #international business #internship #student government #law #law school #work #money #looking for a new job #prose not poetry #friends #it’s prose this time

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alreadyblondenow · 3 years

Text

Each other’s replacements

▸ Na Jaemin x female!reader ▸ Inspired by the anime Scum’s Wish ▸ High school au, SMUUUUT, fluff and angst

Summary: Two broken hearts met unexpectedly and agreed to use each other so you can both move on from your exes. Your hearts belong to each other already, you’re just waiting for love to take place and make everything right. But will you both still choose each other in the future? Word count: 6,988k

Warnings: Using each other to forget your exes, ex Lee Jeno, kind of fuck buddies but no? Fingering, mentions of fingering, handjob, blowjob, and watching each other masturbate, mentions of taking nude photos after sex, Jaemin taking a picture of your naked body after sex (with consent ofc), uproctected sex, mentions of rough sex, making out, swearing, mentions of breakup, actual breakup

A/N: I hope you enjoy this Jaemin fic. I tried writing it as realistic as possible because I think Scum’s Wish is a very mature and realistic anime, I mean shit like that happens in real life. And I think Mugi is so fucking handsome. The ending of the series sux btw HAHAA bc I wanted them to end up together so heres my version of it.

It all happened so fast but the heartbreak stayed and the process of healing is very slow.

Three months have passed already when your ex-boyfriend Jeno broke up with you on a nice afternoon after school. The reason? Well, let’s just say he fell out of love. And that’s what made it worst because you remember that all you ever did was love him and please him.

Every day, you go to school, attend class, study hard but you always looked so gloomy. And whenever Jeno cross paths with you in the hallways, he knew he hurt you badly and that you’re not your normal self anymore. The cheerful and excited girl he fell in love with was gone and it’s all because of him. He can only wish that someone will bring you back and make you happy again.

“I’ll help you with that,” a cold manly voice interrupted you and your thoughts while you were having a hard time throwing the trash. He’s not part of your class, he’s one of Jeno’s classmates but you two were never introduced to each other.

You watch him throw the heavy trash for you and hoping that he will hand the bin afterward but he didn’t. “Lead the way, it’s dirty I’ll hold it for you” he insists, so you do as you’re told, showed him the way so you can finish this day as soon as possible.

Jaemin knew everything. It’s a small school and students usually gossip too much whenever a couple breaks up, especially after being together for so long. He knew who broke your heart, he also knew that you used to smile and be cheerful all the time because he has seen you in places and he knew you're capable of automatically lighting up the place whenever you’re around. But now… all he can see is a broken-hearted girl.

“Here,” you hand him a tissue and your hand sanitizer as a thank you for not letting your hands get dirty. He accepted it and gave you a small smile, obviously, he’s not shy and he was looking directly at you while his hands move. To be honest, you have no reason to be shy with each other, and honestly, you just don’t care anymore you just want to end this day. But Jaemin being the bold man that he is, bravely loosen up the ribbon of your school uniform and undid a few buttons from your school blouse. It was a common thing for students to do that after school as a sign that they're ready to head home and end their day. Jeno used to do it for you, and you didn’t expect Jaemin would do it. Despite the fact that you only met properly today.

You don’t know what happened but your heart was racing the moment he’s done adjust it and you just stare at his crooked tie and figured you may as well loosen it up for him too and return the favor. A bold move that Jaemin did not expect from a girl because he’s used to being with girls who become shy and all flustered after he makes a move.

But you, you’re different.

And that’s when Jaemin realized that you are a perfect match for him.

Word is Na Jaemin is pretty popular with girls. Besides Lee Jeno your ex, Na Jaemin is the second most handsome guy in school. Not only that he’s handsome, but you also know that he is passionate when it comes to photography, he’s naturally smart, not that nice, quiet but cocky, cold but can give anyone the right amount of attention if he wants to. But in your case, you have his full attention.

That afternoon, for the first time in three months, you did not go home alone, someone walked with you and watched you go inside your house.

The same cold but needed interaction with Jaemin happened over and over again until people started to gossip and think that you’re together. But it was nothing like that and you stopped caring about rumors a long time ago. Jaemin is nothing like Jeno, but he’s a gentleman, he’s straightforward but most of the time quiet. And most of the time you share silence not stories and you both love it that way.

You were different people but before you knew it, you were spending more time with each other.

On Valentine's day, you don’t know what came to his mind and brought you a bouquet of roses and gave it to you secretly. You were genuinely happy of course, but you just couldn’t smile that big and show him more. Seeing him from afar with a dozen roses and a smirk, with his black sling bag he uses for school that makes him so attractive… is enough to call your Valentine's day a memorable day.

“You’re special too,” he said and hands you the bouquet. “Ready to go home? Sorry I couldn’t help you with trash today, I picked these up right after school and rushed back-“

“Thank you” you cut him off with a friendly kiss on the cheek that made him blush and shy for the first time.

With a bouquet of roses on your left arm and the trash bin on your right hand, you came back to your classroom to get your stuff and put the bin back. You cleaned your hands and admire the roses as the afternoon sunlight hits them perfectly and finally come out again to meet Jaemin. Only to find him eavesdropping on the classroom near yours.

“What-“

“Shh” he cut you off with a ‘shh’ gesture and made you look at the half-closed door and made you listen to their conversation as well.

Jeno I like you too.

Were words that immediately ruined your day that Jaemin perfected. But this is not about you. Because when you turned your back and looked at the man beside you, you saw yourself. The pain that you’ve been feeling for months now, you saw it in Jaemin’s eyes too. Now you understand that you’re just two broken people who are still in pain. And you have no idea that he has been hurting too.

Of course, seeing Jeno with another girl hurt you badly, but seeing Jaemin get teary-eyed bothered you more. So you reached for his hand and whispered, ‘it’s okay’ even though it’s not, and walked away silently with him to continue your day together.

“Do you think they’re just doing this because people are gossiping about us?” you asked while you watch him stare at his coffee blankly. You’ve never seen him like this even though he’s always quiet and cold.

“N-no. I know my ex, uhm… she wouldn’t use anyone. Is Jeno-“

“No. I know him too. And I know that he’s happy when he found out about us,”

“So it’s true then. Their feelings for each other” he said and went back to staring at his coffee blankly.

You pursed your lips and let out a deep sigh. Allowing yourself to be hurt again by hearing the truth that you have been completely replaced in Jeno’s heart. There was silence. Then you decided to admire the flowers that Jaemin gave to you and feel the soft petals on your fingertips. This day could have been a turning page for the both of you, but now you’re both very sure that you’re not yet ready to open your hearts for somebody else.

“Red roses mean love and romance,” you said as you continue to admire the roses that he gave which made him smile a little. “Do you like me?” and just like that, you gave him the question that you’ve been meaning to ask for the past few months.

“I do” he answered without hesitating, which gave you a shock actually. “Do you?” he returned the question.

“I don’t,” you said the truth because you can’t repay him with lies. No. You can’t do that to Jaemin, “but you’ve become special to me. And I don’t want to lose you too,” Honestly you thought being honest to him will make him feel even more horrible but it didn’t. In fact, it brought the unique handsome smile you love seeing on his face.

“Though, it’s not right that we are using each other to forget our exes-“ you added but he cut you off immediately.

“But I need you, and honestly I’ve been very happy these past few weeks because of you” he confessed. And you wish that you could tell him the same thing but you can’t because it’s still Jeno. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not begging you to stay. You’re an adult and I have nothing against your decisions. But I really hope we could go back to normal and be closer now that we know what each other really feels. I will date you properly when the right time comes… Just not now that we're both still confused and not sure”

Everything did not make sense of course, and the right thing to do is refuse. But the past few weeks were actually good. Not great but still Jaemin was a huge change. So you nod your head and agreed that you should continue what you’re doing but promised each other that if either one of you feels pressured already, then you should stop.

As you continue seeing Jaemin and trying to move on from Jeno, you became comfortable with each other as days go by to the point that neither one of you cares if someone mentions that you look great together even though your relationship is not true.

It was a never-ending try to give each other the chance and love that you deserve. But at the same time, it was a never-ending process of healing from your exes, a never-ending heartbreak whenever you two hear something good about their relationship. And to be honest you’re both happy that you’re not facing this heartbreak alone.

You’re thankful for each other because you have each other’s backs. But in a different way.

Jaemin is thankful for you because he can hold your hand, hug you tightly from behind then whisper sweet words, and kiss your neck, whenever he wants to, and whenever he misses skinship with his ex.

You on the other hand, is thankful too because he does these various things to you and you can just close your eyes and he lets you imagine that he’s Jeno. Like now. You were just cuddling and watching the rain from his window when suddenly his hand roamed under your skirt while he was listening to you talk, and his cold fingers played on the hem of your panties. Teasing your pussy and moving his fingers up and down your wet cover slit.

“How does Jeno touch you? Is gentle? Rough?” He asks in the sexiest tone he ever used and started kissing your neck. You had a hard time answering his question because of what he’s doing, but your mind lurks on the memories you had with Jeno in his room.

You remember how Jeno fingered you in his bed, how two fingers always feel good and that’s how you like it, you remember that while his fingers are deep inside you, he is busy kissing your body. Planting soft kisses on your chest and on your boobs, kissing your nipples and making them sensitive and he puts them in his mouth and sucks it good until it's both swollen.

This is the first time Jaemin had touched you down there. And you swear, you don’t want him to stop and you just want to remove your panties and spread your legs for him.

“Jaem-“ you moaned out an airy tone. Calling his name with your eyes closed and parted lips. Feeling his fingers go up and down your wet slit still.

“Do you mean Jeno?” Jaemin asks. But truth be told he doesn’t mind you moaning his name instead on your first time going too far. And finally, he removed your panties and made you spread your legs for him which you gladly did. Putting two fingers slowly while he’s watching you make the sexiest faces that just simply makes him hard.

Jaemin never rushed, he took his sweet time with your body. Pushing you on the edge over and over again but you don’t know why you haven’t cum yet. His tongue and fingers together were somewhat calming and just made you breathe in and out deeply, which is relaxing while you spread your legs even more.

And when you finally came, it was a nice warm feeling all over your body. Like you just got out of the shower, wet and relaxed. Though you feel so tired, weak and sleepy... Jeno was never like this but your imagination was a big help that you moaned Jeno’s name a couple of times and that made Jaemin felt so accomplished.

“How about you? Don’t you want to cum?” you asked Jaemin while you watch him help you wear your panties again, kissing your thighs after.

“Maybe later,” he said, not admitting that he came earlier too, ruining his boxers briefs.

That day you did more than touching each other’s private parts but actually giving each other oral sex for the first time. His sheets were so ruined because he came so hard when you gave him a blowjob, a handjob and when he jerked himself in front of you while he watches you finger yourself. In return, he made you cum more than three times using his fingers and tongue. And you came home with a weak body and weak legs that you flopped straight in your bed and slept with a smile.

But there are times that it’s just the two of you. Just Jaemin and Y/n, no exes involved. Where you can be free being yourselves whenever you’re alone together. Like him snapping pictures of you out of nowhere while you’re busy kissing him, or whenever you just finished having sex and you’re both too lazy to get dressed again and he will suddenly capture amazing photos of you while you’re still naked in his bed, wearing nothing but the smile he gave you because of the sex.

“Hmm. Jaemin, these are beautiful. Can I have this one? I love seeing your works, it’s like I’m seeing myself through your eyes”

Little did you know that that simple compliment from you made him blush hard and his heart jump. It’s not every day he gets to be himself, but lately, he has been feeling so inspired with his craft and he had a good guess it’s because of you.

“You can keep this too, it’s one of my favorites,” he said and handed you a picture of you kissing him while he smiles so big and so handsome with both of your eyes closed. It’s a perfect moment, a moment that Jaemin captured in the middle of him being so happy that you’re showering him with kisses.

Jaemin is sweet and quiet as usual and he showers you with love and affection every day in his own way. He’s not the normal guy who will praise you and tell you that you’re beautiful, he will just simply look at you like you’re his favorite person in the world. Which you are now. He doesn’t talk too much because one, that’s his personality already and two, he simply loves listening to you even though you don’t talk too much yourself.

He is the complete opposite of Jeno, and that’s why he became special to you.

“Yesterday, me and my mom were at the mall and I saw them. Just from afar and they were about to enter the movies and… you know, seeing them together hurt” he says while kicking stones on your way to your house.

You can only imagine the pain he felt when he saw them spending time together, and now it’s your time to get hurt because Jeno used to bring you to the movies. Then it gave you an idea.

“Do you want to go to the movies tomorrow? My treat,” you said. Nervous and shy you slowly met eyes and stopped walking when you finally arrived in front of your house.

“Did you just realized that I haven’t taken you out on a date? Because I feel bad, I just realized it now” he rambles.

“No no,” you chuckled, “I simply wanted to go to the movies with you. So tomorrow?” you were slowly walking away from him with a small smile on your face. If Jaemin was being honest, he wanted to be with you just a little bit longer. But parting will make your meeting even sweeter the next day.

On the next day, you remember clearly that you said ‘my treat’ yesterday. But the whole day that you’re together he never let you pay for anything, not even a bottle of water. You feel at ease even though it’s your first date and it’s your first time seeing each other in casual clothes and not in your uniforms, or wearing nothing at all. He looked handsome in his get up, he knows how to dress and he sure does look like the warm person you know.

“Do you like anything else?” he whispered beside you while you two wait for the movie to start and watch people enter.

“No I’m just a little chilly. But I’m fine, keep your jacket,” you stopped him before he removes his jacket, you know he will. So instead of lending you his jacket, he kept you close and wrapped an arm around you.

“This is nice, right?” he whispered back and rested his head on yours.

During the movie, Jaemin did not try any funny business. Though you were waiting for it and of course you will give him your consent. If this was Jeno, by this time you’re whimpering and cumming on his fingers by now. But you’re with Jaemin right now, and Jaemin did nothing but hold your hand, keep you close and keep you warm. And the thing that he did that made your heart race the most, was when he tightens his embrace when the couple kissed in the movie, exchanged ‘i love yous’ and he pulled you closer to him. “We’ll get there,” he whispered, “Just remember that I’m the one here and not Jeno” and you nod because you agree to him.

Not long after your first date, you and Jaemin shared a kiss under a lamppost just before you enter your house. It was not your first kiss of course. But it was the first time that you two felt that there we're no lust involved. It was a genuine kiss. A kiss that told you ‘I’m glad you chose to stay in this stupid relationship we have’ not to mention his soft lips were addicting and he was gentle the whole time. He wasn’t rushing you, he wasn’t hungry for you. But you can feel his long to finally move on and give his love wholly to you.

“Is it okay if I kiss you like that every day from now on?” he asked softly, forehead to forehead and just enjoying the cold breeze of the evening and the quietness of the street.

It’s Jaemin, not Jeno. You remind yourself over and over again.

“Yes” you nod and wrapped your arms around his neck, “Kiss me again” you requested. And so Jaemin did, even deeper but this time he took your breath away during the kiss.

The moment you closed the door and Jaemin watched you go inside your house safely, you burst into tears because you can’t help but see Jeno in your head and imagine that it’s Jeno kissing you not Jaemin. Even though it felt nothing like Jeno’s kisses, even though you smell Jaemin’s unique cologne, still it’s Jeno whom you see in your head and it’s Jeno whom you really wanted to kiss.

Days passed by and you try a little harder to show him affection, you try a little harder to be with Jaemin and not think about your ex, you try saying Jaemin’s name more often. Calling him with a smile, surprising him with back hugs, smiling with him more. Honestly, you just want to help yourself with forgetting Jeno completely because it’s exhausting already.

Today is the school’s fair and you’ve been with your friends the whole day laughing and discussing boys over snacks, sex and other stuff. And while you and your friends have been participating in a lot of games today, Jaemin can’t stop taking pictures of you from afar and watch your pretty smile. The smile he’s been seeing a lot lately and he hopes that it’s because of him.

‘Hey beautiful, I like your smile’

You received a text from him, you look around where he is and you found him behind you. Smiling so handsomely with his camera slung on his shoulder. Your friends teased you and Jaemin for being all flirty with your glances, you have never been shy around him but now there are butterflies in your stomach. Jaemin then shamelessly showed your friends how he treats you nicely, he can’t kiss you inside the school grounds so he winked at you instead and smiled.

It definitely made everyone around you jealous. Especially when Jaemin started taking your pictures, something no one was ever seen Jaemin do.

At the end of the day, you and Jaemin walk hand in hand and went to his house to cuddle and flirt more in his bed. Hands intertwined, legs tangled, bodies closer and just listening to each other talk about the most random things.

That’s right, you and Jaemin now talk. No more comfortable silence, no more quiet walks, you’ve come so far to reach this level of comfort. And when you’re both comfortable in each other’s arms like this, you both never shut up about the things you want to share with each other. Like the comfortable silence was gone with your awkward and shy phase too.

You asked him how he used to love his ex and he never shuts up about it, and it is as if he was describing how he’s treating you but when it comes to you everything was better. Like how he used to not care about Valentines for his ex but for you he went to different kinds of flower shop just so he can find the best quality of red roses. He used to hate walking with his ex because it’s making him sweat like crazy, but when it comes to you, seeing and watching you go inside your home safely was satisfying.

“Jaemin what are we? Are we friends with benefits now? Or just friends?” you dropped the question out of nowhere while you two lie in your bed, and you play with his long and perfect eyelashes.

“Hmm. No, fuck buddies avoid feelings while we... well, we try to develop our feelings. Let’s say we're two waiting hearts, were not yet in love with each other but… we belong to each other already. How’s that sound?”

“Waiting hearts. Hmm. I like it. Did you made that up?” you giggle and ran your fingertips on his very soft lips, which made him catch your hand and kiss it before he opens his beautiful eyes again.

“Yeah” he says, “But everything I said was true. Moving on is a bitch and I just can’t wait to love you right,”

And those words were just right. Perfect actually, that it made you kiss him sweetly and sincerely. And with your lips and the way you kiss, Jaemin felt that you made a promise to him. Like you’re not going to make him wait for nothing. And because of that he deepens the kiss and went on top of you, placing his body in between your legs, kissing your body nonstop and whispering sweet things to you.

“When we're finally and officially together, I won’t hurt you as Jeno did,” and you believe him because even though that you’re a wreck now, Jaemin stayed and put up with you.

He suddenly stopped kissing you, letting you breathe and bask at this moment, then he swallowed the lump in his throat and told you the truth. “I’m finally getting there…by the way, I mean, all I think about is us-you,” he was talking about his progress of moving on. “You don’t have to be pressured or anything at this point just, focus on yourself. Okay?” he said and kissed you again.

As your days with Jaemin continues, you don’t see Jeno anymore whenever you’re with Jaemin. No more imagining, it’s just you, the moment, and Jaemin. Though you’re not sure if you’ve already moved on this time or you’re just too overwhelmed because of Jaemin. Still, you know to yourself that you’re getting there and Jaemin is the reason why you’re even more closer to peace now. But you haven’t told him yet because you’re not ready. For you, you know that he will not leave and so it’s okay to take your time.

It started when you realized everything that he has done for you and the things that he’s ready to do for you. Loving again, or being given the opportunity to love someone again so deep is something so special and exciting especially when the man who holds your heart and the one waiting for you right now is Jaemin. The life you’re taking before Jaemin was like a black tunnel that you’ve been walking around in circles for some time now. And you sure as hell don’t want to take that path again.

And just thinking about experiencing the things that Jaemin has to offer, you can only do that if you give up on Jeno. So with great effort, you slowly focus your mind only on Jaemin and replace every bit of Jeno in your life with Jaemin, and from now on you make sure that you have something in return for him.

“Jaemin-“ you moan his name. Something so new and so satisfying for Jaemin to hear it's his name you moan now, not Jeno’s.

“You know, you make me shy whenever you say my name” he catches his breath and came closer to you to plant kisses on your back and knead your boobs from behind, nipples hard and swollen because you’ve been in bed with him for almost two hours now. “What do you need?” he asks while making you feel good with his lips and hands.

“Maybe slow down? I’m not going anywhere,” you hear him giggle from behind because of your request, slapping your but playfully and squeezing it good. Then suddenly, out of nowhere he rolled his hips, and let out a sexy grunt. “Fuck Jaemin, I wasn’t ready-“ you croak and landed on the mattress, face first as you grip the sheets and take Jaemin’s cock followed by a wave of hard and fast thrusts.

He kept a firm grip on your waist as he gives you hard thrusts and he kept you down on the mattress, a hand on your waist and a hand on your nape. It kept your movements minimal that’s why you can’t do anything now that you’re on the edge and he’s torturing you using his dick. But the best part of Jaemin fucking you from behind is the way he fucks you rough... so rough sometimes that you get red marks after a good round. This only happens whenever he catches his breath, but sometimes his thrusts become slow and deeper and honestly you feel like he’s rearranging your insides. And of course you love it whenever he’s just so fast and the sound of skin slapping surrounds his room and the impact of his thrust just drags you on the mattress, almost at the edge of the bed and he would have to drag your body towards him and fuck you faster and harder.

But this time, your pussy is so sensitive and your body is giving up and shivering already that you try and push him away, moan his name for mercy, grip his sheets while you arch your back so beautifully to ease your sensitivity.

“You said you’re not going anywhere? Why are you running away from me? Huh?” it was a sexy tone and his thrusts started to go slow but deeper than before and he had spread your legs again from behind. His arm is around your neck and ends at your shoulder, bodies closer than ever as he puts his whole weight on you and you feel his hard rock abs hits your back. Then he started thrusting hard again but now you can’t move your body because he got you locked in his arms, and instead of gripping the sheets, you now grip Jaemin’s arm and hands as you don’t have a choice but to accept his hard thrust.

Thrust after thrust, you breathe heavily and let out groans and call out his name. Until your body can’t take it anymore and you’re shaking uncontrollably and you did everything you can to push him away and try curling yourself into a ball but Jaemin was quick to flip you on your back and reach in for a deep kiss.

Kissing you while you cum and enjoy your orgasm. Feeling his tongue swirl around your as your body shakes and his hands caress your thighs so you could calm down and melt on his kiss.

After you cum, you and Jaemin did not stop kissing. He stayed above you, in between your legs and proceed to make out. Slowly and passionately, hands roaming to appreciate each other’s body, hands together and your lips locks and you look at each other with deep admiration.

“I want to date for real now. I’m so afraid to lose you Y/n,” he said directly into your eyes and rested his forehead on yours. “I promise I can do more for you, just be mine completely” he reached for your hands and kissed your knuckles.

Finally, you thought. And to be honest you have so much to say but none came out from your mouth. You looked at his tired sex face, his hair is all over his face, sweaty and his lips are swollen because of your intense kisses. And because your heart is full of happiness right now, you just nod so fast and cup his face and attacked him with kisses.

A love for love.

The first few days with Jaemin were beautiful. You both have your hearts full of love admiration towards one another and you shower each other with love every day without having second thoughts. You have never been loved like this and you didn’t know that you can love someone as deeply.

In just a few days, lust and love were perfectly balanced in your relationship. Now that you’re officially together, you and Jaemin would rather talk non-stop while holding hands, laugh and laugh until you’re both in tears, rather than have sex and exhaust each other out. But of course, now that you’re together, you can finally have the right to stay the night at their house, meet his family, have quiet sex at night where Jaemin’s lips are on your lips, catching every sound and moan you make so his parents won’t suspect.

“I love you,” you said and kissed him before you close your eyes and drift away. In return, he tightens his embrace and kissed you one too many times.

“I love you too,”

Now that you and Jaemin are official, he wanted to do everything again with you. Meaning, he wanted to give you flowers again as your boyfriend this time and not just as someone who’s waiting for you. He wanted to take you out on a proper date as your boyfriend, on your favorite fast food and spend all night long being happy with you.

SUNDAY

At first, you didn’t want to agree with his plan because him giving you all his love every day was enough. But he insists, and that’s why you’re waiting for your handsome boyfriend at your favorite fast food with a glass of water in front of you. He’s 30 minutes late already and you wonder why.

“I’ll get the red ones please, my girlfriend loved those last Valentine's day,” Jaemin’s smile was so big as he watches the florist wrap the red roses he got for you. He’s late because he went to the same shop where he bought you the flowers that you loved last Valentine's day.

And just as Jaemin walks out of the flower shop with a bouquet of red roses in his arm and a smile on his face, he thought about how this night will definitely be a great night for the two of you. And most importantly, no exes to ruin your first date as a couple.

While you were waiting for Jaemin inside, you didn’t know that he’s outside with a dozen roses in his arm and just smiling because he is now looking at the girl whom he loves the most.

Then suddenly, his phone rang and accepted an unexpected phone call. The voice of the girl on the other line was familiar. Very familiar. And his fist balled up immediately when he heard her crying through the phone. Turns out, he still can’t say no to the girl he used to love so much and his excitement on seeing you was immediately replaced with anger.

“Who made you cry? Where are you?” Jaemin asked sternly to his ex.

“He left me Jaems- I’m sorry I don’t know who else to call, I’m at home can you please go here? I really need someone right now, I’ll lose my mind,”

And just like that, he chose his ex over you. He told himself, he will be quick and still meet you afterward. But you waited for an hour… until closing time. Leaving tons and tons of messages to Jaemin but he didn’t return any of them. Maybe something important came up? A family matter? You tried and tried to forgive him even though you’re pissed that he didn’t show up. You even reminded yourself that you didn’t want this date in the first place so why be upset? So it’s okay.

When you’re finally near your house after a very disappointing date that could have been a beautiful one for you and Jaemin, a very familiar figure was waiting for you outside your house.

One glance at that perfect face, small crescent eyes, and beautiful smile, gave your mind an instant flashback. The guy who loved you first way before Jaemin came into your life, the man who loved you in your highs and lowest moment, the man you’ve been waiting to come back…. is finally back.

“How are you?” he started.

“Better. Jeno, what are you doing here?” you asked, straight to the point.

“I just came by to see you. I’m the one who ruined us but I still miss you from time to time you know? And now I know why,”

“And that is?”

“Regrets. Now that I’m single again, for sure my regrets will even weigh more,” he let out a heavy sigh and looked at his shoes before he gave you a question. A question that he already knows the answer. “If I ask you to come back, will you accept it?” he didn’t look you in the eye. He just stared at the sky and waited for your answer.

“No,” you said honestly and without regrets. “I waited for you to come back long enough. And I worked so hard to be healed again,”

“Then I should’ve asked you earlier then. I should’ve left her earlier,”

What he said sounded wrong for you. Because you know if he did those earlier you will end up hurting Jaemin instead. At least now, it’s clear like the sky above that you no longer love Jeno.

The night ended with a friendly hug. It’s the only comfort you can offer to him because you respect your boyfriend. And you well know that staying longer with Jeno tonight can spark your first fight with Jaemin.

But as you lie in your bed and think about everything that happened tonight, your mind takes you to unwanted scenarios where Jaemin chose to comfort his ex rather than meeting up with you. It’s not right to doubt Jaemin, so you close your eyes and looked forward to the next day.

And just as you thought, you’re going to wake up with a bunch of missed calls or texts from Jaemin, you have none. So there is something wrong.

Jaemin on the other hand is staring at a white ceiling and thinking about the things that he can’t take back right now. It’s too early for regrets but he doesn’t have a choice but to rethink his wrong decisions, over and over again. Starting when he answered the phone call from the naked girl beside him right now. The wrong decisions he made last night was the epitome of the phrase, ‘one thing led to another’

He answered the call and stood you up.

He went to his ex’s house.

He returned the kiss.

He agreed to fuck.

It was all his choice. Wrong choices that made him lose and lost you way before your relationship could have bloomed beautifully. And he can’t take that back because he can't show his face to you anymore for the sexual activity that happened last night between him and his ex, somehow brought them back together.

SUNDAY

It all happened so fast but the heartbreak stayed and the process of healing is very slow.

Seven days have passed already when Jaemin stood you up on a date to choose his ex over you. The reason? Well, you don’t know because you and Jaemin did not talk it out… the breakup sort of happened automatically when you saw him and his now girlfriend again, holding hands while entering the school grounds on a cold Monday morning. And that’s what made it worst because you remember that all you ever did was love him and be better to make way for the love you thought you both want.

Every day, you go to school, attend class, study hard but you always looked so gloomy. Again. And whenever Jaemin crosses paths with you in the hallways, he knew he hurt you badly and that he broke every promise he told you. He can only wish that he could turn back time and choose to not answer that fucking call.

Just like that, you’re back in that black tunnel and you didn’t expect that Jaemin will be the reason why you’re back on this dark path again. And this time, the heartbreak was ten times even worst than what you felt during your breakup with Jeno.

A few more weeks after the breakup, you started being alone with yourself again and try to give your heart a break from all the drama.

But one fateful afternoon, when everyone had gone home already and you’re on trash duty again, as usual, Jaemin finally decided to swallow his pride and say the apology you deserve.

“I’m sorry, Y/n,” Jaemin said out of nowhere. He was looking straight into your eyes when he said it, and you can see that he’s sincere through his eyes.

“I hope you’re happy” and that's all you can say and try to walk away.

“I’m not- do you still love me?”

It was a question that broke both of your hearts because you both know that even though love is involved, it’s still not enough to keep you together.

But still, you answered him with all honesty. “Yes” short and simple.

“Then let's be together-“ he proposed with hopeful eyes.

“And what? Cheat?” you ask sternly, he nodded. “One of the reasons why I liked you back then is because you’re not complicated. You’re a simple ‘yes’ and ‘no’, but now you’re the one who complicates things. I’m sorry. It’s a no,” and that is an answer Jaemin did not expect from you because he thought you loved him that much that you’re still going to accept him. But maybe, the pain that he’s feeling right now, is the same pain that you felt when he chose his ex over you that night.

As days, months, and seasons change but of course the heartbreak never left, you focus more on being with yourself until finally you survived this school year and today is your last day in school. But before everything ended, a lot has happened before it finally ended, like Jeno suddenly transferring schools, Jaemin is single again, and you were awarded for ranking #3 out of hundreds of other students studying their asses off.

That same afternoon, while you’re fixing your stuff and ready yourself to go home under the pouring rain, Jaemin found you alone in your classroom again. And it felt like you’re meeting again for the first time. You don’t know why you accepted his help, you don’t know why you let him walk you home under his small umbrella that made you walk closely together.

He was quiet. You were quiet. But it was not the comfortable silence you used to have, it was very awkward. But you both endured it because if you’re both going to be honest with your feelings, you both wanted this.

“Are we going to do this again?” you ask before you enter your house.

“Yes. The right way,”

And you know you both found your way back to each other because it’s the right thing to do.

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takamishinko · 3 years

Note

could I pls request the bakusquad with a close FTM friend . their friend is pretty insecure about his chest . he’s also insecure about what people would think of him being trans . how would the bakusquad react if someone Mineta said something nasty to him ? if you’re uncomfortable w/ this request , feel free to ignore it , I don’t want to make you uncomfortable

have a wonderful day / noon / night 💞

sure u can! hope u have a wonderful day/noon/night too :)

perfect

a/n: this is my writing content for ftm readers i hope i don't offend anyone!

pronouns: he/him, ftm!reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of pre-transition, transphobic phrases, sexual harassment, and mineta

_____

you were pretty close friends with the whole bakusquad, close enough to the point where they would not hesitate to throw hands if someone messed with you. they know about your situation and they completely accept you for it.

they all took the news better than you expected. mina was super excited when you first came out to her and even though she had a big mouth she kept yours a secret because she knew how important this was to you, plus you might have not been comfortable about others knowing about it yet. sero was super chill about it and kirishima called you manly right after you came out to him. kaminari on the other hand was having an internal war with himself since he thought you were both pretty and handsome before and after. last but not least, bakugou hit you with a "ha? i don’t care as long as you’re still strong." after you told him.

all the reassuring comments your friends gave you made you feel a lot better about yourself. you had also told some of your other friends in the class like midoriya, uraraka, iida, and asui. they all supported you and since class 1A is pretty open about subjects like this you had nothing to worry about.

however, just because most people have reassured it didn’t mean that you’d just suddenly feel better right away. in a way you still felt different. you were still insecure about what other people around you would think about you, especially your chest area since your hero costume made them very obvious that they've gone through transition before. harsh comments from insensitive bastards still scar your mind deeply. their hurtful words pierced through your heart and mind.

"you'll never be a real boy."

"you're not normal."

words like this break you down bit by bit and destroy your self esteem until you're left feeling worthless and defeated. people like this played a big role in why you never confided anyone in your secret. you feared that they would repeat these words, especially your dear classmates.

after school, sero, kaminari, kirishima, and bakugou had left to do some training while you, mina, and some other people had stayed behind to help clean up and chill in the classroom. it was a nice way to ease yourself. mina was cheerful and funny teasing uraraka about deku, while you and tsuyu were chattering about the test that you took and guessing what mark you both received.

you decided to stay behind a little in class after everyone returned to the dorms. you hummed while watching the sunset. it was a good environment to do some studying in, quiet and peaceful, seeing as there was an important test coming up.

you were just about to start packing up after finishing the last question on the review page until you saw a short purple figure pop up next to the door. it was mineta, the class pervert that everyone tried to stay away from. you didn't like mineta obviously, no one did. you didn’t exactly want to talk to him but you decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and assumed he wasn’t here to be grotesque.

why was he just standing there eyeing you up and down? an uncomfortable pricking sensation washed over you so while packing up, you decided to speak to break the awkward silence. "hello mineta, can i help you?"

mineta wore a smug look before the corner of his lips lifted into a snide grin.

"hey~ d/nnn." he mocked, holding the last letter of your previous name.

what..?

your heart fell into your stomach at his words. why the hell was he bringing up your deadname? you balled your shaking fists and tried to calm down before you mauled the smug grape with your quirk.

"it's y/n, and if you don't have anything to say i wanna go back to the dorms." you speak with feigned courtesy as you finished backing up, scooting out of your chair.

"alright alright y/n whatever. say~ what are you doing by yourself all alone in the classroom at this time. perhaps you were waiting for someone?" mineta sing-songed while walking closer to you.

"i was just trying to get some homework finished,” you grit out. “do you mind moving? i would like to leave-"

before you could even finish your sentence you see drool coming out of minetas mouth and his hands doing the signature grabby grabby while his eyes practically drowned in your chest area.

"you’ve probably got a nice pair of boobs huh? even if they’re flat."

mineta mentioning that certain body part broke you. the tears immediately started to accumulate under your eyes, on the edge of spilling. you could've easily pushed mineta away due to how much smaller he was than you, but you didn't have the strength to. you felt even weaker than him and didn't have the will to fight back, your limbs being reduced to jelly. you felt helpless.

mineta on the other hand felt powerful, someone like you with a strong quirk being reduced to something akin to a quivering rabbit gave him a sick sense of pleasure. just when mineta was about to place his hands on you a certain spiky haired blonde rushed into the room and lifted mineta away from you.

"OI SMALL FRY! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOUR HANDS GOING HUH??" bakugou snarled at the midget followed with a strong blast.

kirishima, kaminari, and sero quickly ran into the room. mr. aizawa followed up upon hearing the commotion. his eyes scanned over your distressed form before looking over at a shaken mineta. he assessed the situation and let out a sigh, hands pinching the bridge of his nose.

"mineta, my office, right now." he spoke, voice lacking any sort of amusement.

"b-but" mineta stuttered out.

"now."

mineta froze at the tone of mr. aizawa's voice and left the room with him, his head down. before aizawa left he gave you an apologetic look and told you he'd come back later to talk to you. kaminari followed them out to listen in.

kirishima grabbed your arm gently and sat you down on the chair. "y/n you okay man? he didn't touch you anywhere right?" he questioned worriedly.

"i’m gonna turn that guy into a cocoon, i swear." sero followed up.

you were incredibly surprised at what just almost happened. you almost got harassed by a midget grape but thank goodness your friends were there to save you from him.

"thanks guys." you muttered out while wiping away stray tears.

"of course man! we're always here for you, bakugou heard mineta all the way from across the hall when we came back to grab our stuff and immediately rushed over! you should've seen him, it was like he was running for his life!" kirishima said, chuckling.

bakugou rolled his eyes. "shut up shitty hair, he's in need, of course i’m gonna sprint over. if he ever says that shit to you again, i’ll beat that little fucker up again.

"well you won't have to worry about that anymore because i went to eavesdrop and mr. aizawa said he’s under house arrest for a long time for attempting to sexually harass a classmate." denki’s cheery voice rings out as he walks into the classroom while pointing finger guns at all of you.

your eyes lit up from hearing the good news.

"hey y/n if anyone messes with you be sure to let us know ok?" sero smiles as he puts a hand on your shoulder.

"you're like a brother to us and we won't hesitate to fight anyone who dares to do something like what mineta just did." kirishima spoke, grinning.

"you're perfect just the way you are y/n, and we love you for that! who the hell cares about what others think of you. just be yourself and everyone else will love ya." denki followed up with a smirk.

"dunce face is right, don't worry ‘bout anyone else, not even us if you don't want to. if you're still feeling down i can blast dunce face if you want." bakugou said while chuckling evilly.

the room filled with laughter at kaminari’s protests. thanked your friends for being there for you. you couldn't have asked for a better friend group than them. after a while, the five of you walk back to the dorms. you smile to yourself while the other four bicker and laugh, you wished to live in this moment forever.

#bnha #bnha headcanons #:bnha comfort #bnha x trans reader #bnha x reader #bnha x male reader #bnha x m!reader #bnha x ftm reader #boku no hero comfort #boku no hero x trans reader #boku no hero x reader #boku no hero headcanons #boku no hero x male reader #boku no hero x m!reader #boku no hero acadamia #baku squad #baku squad comfort #baku squad x reader

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violettelueur · 3 years

Text

— ITADORI YUJI + INUMAKI TOGE + NANAMI KENTO || THEM AS OLDER BROTHERS

↳ featuring : itadori yuji + inumaki toge + nanami kento from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : spoilers for non-manga readers (volume 0) + swearing + grammar issues

↳ form : headcanons

↳ published : 10 may

↳ pronouns : she/her

↳ request : Hi ! Can I please get them as big brother headcanon with itadori, inumaki, nanami with a little sister! If you don't do family fluff please ignore this and have a nice day

↳ barista’s notes : let me admit, i haven’t been feeling the best mentally - probably because of the random exams that have been thrown at me from my school after doing 6 of them around 3-4 weeks ago - so i’m going to close my request box for the time being and maybe take some time to rest (even though...i haven’t been writing for a while until yesterday ʕ ㅇ ᴥ ㅇʔ) but moving on from that, i hope you enjoy your cup of classic black coffee and please return when you can ╲ʕ·ᴥ·　╲ʔ

Itadori being your older brother is basically having an instant best friend in your life because Itadori is the type of brother that is reckless, hilarious, and encouraging.

Itadori will encourage you in anything that you choose to do - except for stuff that is bad, so don’t take advantage of that - but he is a supportive person in your life.

For example, if you want to get into a sport, Itadori is the best person to encourage you due to his superhuman abilities - lowkey, you both will argue that he is cheating.

Since Itadori knows how to cook, he knows how to make your favourite meal and you both will have cooking nights together that will turn into food fights leading Grandpa to yell at you both for the mess that you made.

When it comes to education, Itadori gets average grades but when it comes to science, you both are studying together all night to do well in that certain exam.

During school, everyone knows you because of Itadori and they will ask you about why he doesn’t take any sports club...just say “I have no idea”

After school, you and Itadori will go to the nearest fast-food restaurant at the end of the week and just munch on some food - both of you will steal each other's chips/fries even though you both ordered them, it’s just more tasty for some reason.

When he tells you about the whole Sukuna and curse incident and that he has to be executed by the end of eating all of 20 fingers, you would just take it as a joke at first before realising that he isn’t - it would just be a silent stare at you both after you deep it and tears will appear...that just won’t fall.

Itadori is also the brother that knows how to cheer you up and instantly make you smile, and when he is the one that makes you upset, he knows how to make you smile again - aka giving you our favourite food.

Itadori knows that you can protect yourself but after the whole curse incident, he will become more protective than he has ever been, especially with Sukuna because you don’t know what that old man would do.

Fushiguro is the only guy Itadori trusts you with like Todo is out of the question - he does trust Gojo as well since he is the strongest but Fushiguro seems like a better option.

Overall, Itadori as a brother is a brother that we all wished we had because we do need the hint of happiness in our lives and the support that he would instantly give.

Inumaki as an older brother is a weird one to describe because he is both annoying and caring at the same time to the point where you don’t know what to do.

Inumaki is the type of brother that will play pranks on you from time to time and you will run around, chasing him to hit him leading Maki and Panda to laugh.

Other times, Inumaki is the caring brother that everyone wants since he seems like the type to be perspective on your actions/anything you do - if you are thirsty, he will press a really cold water bottle to your cheek...doesn’t matter if it’s winter.

If you are able to talk or not, you and Inumaki will have a secret language together where you will chat shit about other people - but you both will learn sign languages together.

When you and Inumaki talk together, people are just purely confused about what you are both talking about because how do you understand onigiri ingredients.

Inumaki doesn’t trust any guy with you, so when any guy from the Kyoto side comes to talk to you, he will come from behind, grab your upper arms and just guide you away like the person in front didn’t expect - Todo is also out of the question for this headcanon.

When you first meet Okkotsu, Inumaki will guide you away from him in the beginning because Rika is there and Okkotsu will profusely apologise in the beginning for scaring you - when in reality you understand his situation completely.

When Inumaki and Okkotsu get closer as friends, you are also close with him and Inumaki finds it cute to the point where he will tease you and tell you to confess to him even when you don’t have a crush on him.

One thing Inumaki is thankful for is you carrying spare throat medicine for him when his spare on runs out, and if he needs to go buy more, you already have a cabinet for him.

You both as siblings are also competitive, like when it comes to games, if one person wins, the other will instantly ask for a rematch.

Overall, Inumaki as a brother is a funny experience because you both care for each other to the fullest in your own ways but there are times where you would get annoyed at him due to his pranks - Maki will attack him for you, don’t worry.

Nanami has an older brother that is the stern type to the point where he seems distant (not to the point where you question his brotherly love for you) but does worry about your wellbeing over his.

Nanami wants to make your life as comfortable as possible because he doesn’t want you to live in an endless cycle of work as he does - he wants the best for you, see him as a second parent.

Nanami will text you almost every day to make sure you have drunk water and had something to eat and if you haven’t, prepare to get a lecture through voice message/phone call - and he will come to wherever you are with a bag of food.

When he is on the phone with you, Gojo will always try to sneak in a few words only for the device to suddenly fly away from him because Nanami refuses to let him talk to you.

He will also make sure you are at least 5 miles away from Gojo (maybe 10) because he doesn’t want you to get influenced by his senior and personally, he knows that the white-haired man will flirt with you no matter what your relationship is to him.

When it comes to dating, he will tell you this: anyone is fine but they have to be a good person, anyone is fine...anyone but Gojo Satoru.

So when Gojo somehow gets to flirt with you, Nanami is already standing behind him with his wrapped up blade lifted up - and you would just give the widened eye look because what else are you supposed to say?

When he was a salaryman, you would always come to his work to give him food so he didn’t have to pay for himself and he will try to pay you back - but you refuse even when you secretly want to take it (you still do this for him, so you both would buy food for each other)

You both go to cafes quite a bit when he is free to talk to each other about life since it’s hard to catch up to each other - especially if you are both sorcerers - since it’s a really nice heart to heart conversation.

When you were introduced to Itadori, the first-year can’t help but question if you were really Nanami’s younger sister because you were somewhat more out-going than he is but he can see some similarities in personalities from you both.

Overall, Nanami as an older brother is someone that is an act of service type of man when it comes to his brotherly love to you, he does care about you immensely and will try to make your life a little easier than his since all he wants is the best for you in this world.

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helloalycia · 3 years

Text

teenage dirtbag [three] // wanda maximoff

summary: Wanda's boyfriend continues to be an aggravation in your life, causing some distance between you and Wanda

warning/s: none

author's note: i really appreciate the feedback you guys gave in the last part – it’s always motivating to read your reactions/comments 🥰

Sorting things out with Wanda made everything return to normal in no time. So much in fact that she decided I was worth inviting to her and her brother's birthday party.

Never in a million years did I expect the most popular girl in our grade to know who I was, let alone invite me to her birthday party, so to say I was surprised was an understatement.

"It's not a big deal if you can't make it," she said when she handed me the invitation in class. "I mean, I'd love it if you could, but yeah, no pressure."

I was in awe, accepting the invite and reading it quickly. It must have been a pretty expensive party if she was giving out special invites, that's for sure.

"You want me to come?" I asked, still unsure whether this was a joke or not.

"Only if you want to," she said quickly, eyes darting around the room and anywhere but at me. "Like I said, you don't have to. It's not a big deal and– I– yeah." She pressed her lips together and stopped rambling, offering me a small smile.

"Thanks," I said quietly, slotting the invite in my notebook. "I'll, er, I'll think about it."

She pushed a strand of hair behind her ear and faced forward, nodding. "Yeah, sure, no rush."

After that awkward conversation, I discovered she'd also invited Y/BF/N, the two of them developing a little friendship the more she'd hung out with me. He didn't mind going, but only wanted to do so if I went.

"I feel like I kinda don't wanna go," I admitted to him after school as we were studying in the library.

"Oh?" He rose an eyebrow. "And why's that?"

I played with the pencil in my hand. "I don't know, it's just– it's gonna be full of all of her other friends. And they don't really like me. Plus, her dick of a boyfriend is gonna be there. I just think she might have invited me to be nice. Like she might have felt like she had to because we sit together, y'know?"

"I think you know that isn't true," he said knowingly. "Maybe, just maybe, she actually wants us there, wants you there, to celebrate her birthday."

I chewed the inside of my mouth, giving it some thought. But the idea of going to Wanda's house party and seeing a bunch of people I didn't care about getting pissed wasn't comforting. Besides, even if I went, I'd probably see Wanda once before she'd get scooped away by Nate. What was the point?

"Nah, I don't think I'm going," I decided. "She won't notice. I'll just get her a present instead."

Y/BF/N sighed, clearly not impressed with my answer. Nonetheless, he said, "Okay, suit yourself."

"You can go if you want," I added, knowing his presence wasn't linked with mine.

"No Y/N, no party," he said with a dismissive shrug, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Such a good friend," I said teasingly, but there was truth to my words. And I knew he knew that.

When I saw photos and videos of Wanda and Pietro's party all over my social media the day after, I knew I'd made the right choice in not going. It was the same visuals of everyone getting drunk, doing stupid shit and making a mess. Call me a loser, but that wasn't really my scene. Pietro and Wanda both seemed to enjoy it though, judging from the pictures.

Instead, I bought her a birthday present, knowing I didn't have to but I kind of wanted to, and planned to give it to her when she turned up to class. It was her birthday today, despite throwing the party over the weekend, so I hoped it would make up for my absence (thought I doubted she noticed).

She showed up and settled beside me as I was writing the date in my notebook, making me look up to see she'd made an extra effort to dress up for her birthday, looking fancier than usual. I couldn't help but smile at the giant '18' birthday badge pinned to her jacket.

"Happy birthday, Wanda," was the first thing I said when I saw her. "You look amazing."

A bashful smile appeared on her lips. "Thank you, Y/N."

"I hope your party went well," I said, giving her my full attention whilst trying not to drool over how beautiful she looked.

Surprisingly, her smile faded and her eyebrows knitted together. "Yeah, it did... could you not make it? I tried looking for you and– yeah..."

I opened my mouth to speak, admittedly a little embarrassed that she'd caught me out. I was sure she wouldn't notice – the pictures made it seem like there were loads of guests, I'd definitely have blended in if I were there – but clearly I was mistaken.

"I just thought–" she began, before shaking her head. "Never mind."

"Sorry, I thought–" I started, but like her, didn't know what to say. "Parties aren't my thing," I admitted truthfully. "But it looked fun. You enjoyed it, right?"

She nodded, a small forced smile on her lips. "Yeah, right. It's cool. No biggie."

I swallowed awkwardly. It seemed like a biggie and now I felt bad.

"I, er, got you a gift," I blurted, hoping to change the subject. Reaching into my backpack, I pulled out the terribly wrapped present and held it out nervously. "I hope you, er, like it."

Her eyebrows raised as her eyes flickered between the present and I. "Oh? You didn't have to. I wasn't expecting anything."

Was it hot in here or was it just me?

I pulled my collar away from my neck, hoping to circulate some air. "I wanted to. It's not a big deal."

She accepted the gift, fingers brushing mine and making me even more nervous, before opening it up. Her eyes sparkled with delight as she revealed a brand new leather paintbrush carry case.

"The one you always carry around is tattered and falling apart, so I thought I'd get you a new one," I explained, feeling like I had to. "I mean, unless the other one has some sort of sentimental value, then in that case, I can just return this."

"Are you kidding? I love it!" she exclaimed, looking to me with a grin. "It's beautiful, Y/N. I don't even know what else to say."

My shoulders relaxed, a relieved smile tugging at my lips. "Good. Th-that's good. I'm glad you like it."

Without warning, she moved forward off her stool and wrapped her arms around my shoulders, pulling me in for a hug. I was startled, unable to think straight with her body pressed so close to mine and her floral perfume wafting into my nose. Why did she have to smell so good?

"Thank you," she muttered, pulling away but not quite letting go. Her eyes were glowing as they watched me carefully, accompanying her weak-in-the-knees smile. I was sure I'd melt. "It means a lot."

I nodded, not trusting myself to speak for fear I'd say something stupid. I resisted the urge to look down at her lips, which were pulled into a small, appreciative smile. She let go of me, looking to the case again and unravelling it. I caught my breath meanwhile, my senses still on override as her perfume lingered.

She was just so damn beautiful.

—

"Okay, how about this – robotic or organic aliens. Which would you rather invade our planet?" Y/BF/N asked.

I chuckled at his question. "Definitely haven't thought about that one, but let's see..."

We were hanging in the bleachers out near the football field as we waited for football practice to end. Y/BF/N had a Film project to do and needed to film the field, so I offered to help like the good friend I was.

"Probably organic," I answered as I balanced on the bleachers, standing up and tiptoeing down them like steps. "At least we could reason with them if they tried to kill us because they'd have a conscience. Robotic aliens would just be programmed to take over and that's it."

Y/BF/N seemed against the idea as he played with his camera. "Yeah, but if they were robotic, all we'd have to do is launch a missile at them and they'd explode. You can break metal. It's harder to break organic matter."

I stifled a laugh. "You've given this much thought, I see."

He gave me a knowing look. "You telling me you don't think aliens exist?"

I stopped tiptoeing and stood still as I looked down at him with humoured eyes. "You know I know aliens exist."

He waved his hand like that was enough reasoning. "There you go then!"

I laughed, wondering how he thought of this stuff, then continued to balance as I walked down the bleachers. Probably the wrong choice as when I heard a voice call me, I looked up, saw it was Wanda, then proceeded to miss a step and fall onto my arse.

"Oh God, Y/N, are you okay?" she asked, moving forward to help me.

My face heated up as Y/BF/N laughed his arse off beside me. I accepted Wanda's hand and let her pull me up, before letting go immediately when I could handle it myself. Her presence always made me nervous, but this was just terrible.

"Yeah, I'm good," I said, glancing at her and freezing at her piercing gaze and suppressed smile.

"You sure?" she asked, glancing at Y/BF/N, before trying to hide her own laughter.

Fuck me, why was I such a mess whenever she was around?

"Very sure," I said, though my back began to ache from where I hit it. "What's up, anyway?"

Y/BF/N finally shut up, to my relief, and Wanda minimised her laughter before scratching her head.

"I'm waiting for practice to end so I can take Pietro home," she said, nodding to the field. "I saw you both sat here and thought I'd say hi. Are you guys watching practice?"

"Not really," I answered, before tilting my head to Y/BF/N. "We're just waiting for it to end so Y/BF/N can film for his project."

"Ooh, that sounds interesting," she said, intrigued and looking to him now. "What's that about?"

As he caught her up on it, I found myself checking Wanda out without realising. She was animated as she listened to Y/BF/N talk about his assignment, eyes giving him all of her attention, and a permanent smile was fixed on her lips as she listened to him. Though it wasn't directed at me, I felt butterflies swirling a storm in my stomach and clutched it, hoping they'd go away. I loved and hated the feeling all at once.

Breaking me from my reverie, a football flew past all three of us and hit the bleachers, startling us all. We looked in the direction it came from and saw the football team looking back at us, some laughing and some disgruntled. Two players ran towards us and when they got close enough, I made them out as Pietro and Nate.

Nate was laughing as he looked between us all, before his gaze fell on me. "It's Y/N, right? I feel like I'm always throwing that thing at you. Sorry about that."

But his constant laughing and lack of guilt refuted his words. I merely clenched my jaw and narrowed my eyes his way, not that he seemed to care nor notice. I was a mere fly in a world that revolved around him. He'd never notice.

"Babe, I'm sorry, I didn't even know you were over here," he added, looking to Wanda. "You okay?"

Wanda crossed her arms and seemed frustrated. "I'm fine, Nate. Just get your ball."

He shrugged and grabbed his ball. Before leaving, he pressed a kiss to Wanda's cheek which made me wince, but she made no attempt in enjoying it. He didn't seem to care as he took off running back to his team. Pietro smiled apologetically at the three of us.

"I'm sorry," he said genuinely. "He can be such a dick sometimes."

That was the understatement of the century.

With that, he turned and ran back to his team to finish up. Wanda sighed, running a hand through her hair, as Y/BF/N and I exchanged glances.

"I should get the car running," she said awkwardly, pointing a thumb over her shoulder and towards the car park. "Good luck with your assignment, Y/BF/N. And I'll see you tomorrow, Y/N."

Waving goodbye with an awkward smile, I watched her leave and wondered the same thing I always did whenever Nate decided to make an appearance in my life.

How could she be dating such a dick?

—

Apart from the birthday party I didn't go to, I'd never been invited (or had a reason to go) to Wanda's house. I'd seen it, rode my bike past it, but never actually been in it. So, when she invited me to her place to work on a project we'd been assigned in class, I was unsure how to feel. She was adamant though and I had no reason to say no, so the only thing left to do was say yes. Even when she offered to drive me there after school.

"This is your car?" I asked with disbelief.

I knew absolutely nothing about cars, but I wasn't blind. Hers was a gorgeous deep red colour with a convertible roof that was currently lowered so anyone in it would feel the sun on their back and wind in their hair.

"Yeah, you like it?" she asked as she got into the driver's seat.

I gulped and sat in the passenger's seat, throwing my backpack at my feet. "It's so nice. You sure you don't mind me drinking in this?"

I had a Pepsi bottle in my hand and was deathly afraid of opening it now in case I spilt it and the cleaning bill would be more than I made in a year at the pizza parlour.

She laughed, already pulling out of the car park. "Of course. Don't be silly."

I glanced in her direction, trying not to get distracted by how good she looked in the driver's seat. She was wearing a red leather jacket, funnily enough, matching the exterior of her car, and she had dark eyeliner around her eyes, accentuating the shape and colour of them and leaving me speechless whenever she looked my way.

"There's CDs in the glove compartment," she was saying as she focused on the road. "Or you can mess around with the radio. It's up to you."

"CDs?" I asked, it piquing my interest. I reached into the glove compartment, adding, "What is this, the 2000s?"

She rolled her eyes playfully, accepting my teasing, as I flicked through the small stack of albums.

"I don't know, I guess I just like having the physical version," she said with a shrug. "It's kind of like a collection."

I chuckled at her need to explain herself, watching the way she rubbed her neck nervously, smiling with embarrassment. Looking back to the albums, a particular one grabbed my attention and I plucked it out with raised brows.

"Oh my God, you like Paramore?" I asked, looking to her with surprise. "Now it's definitely the 2000s."

Her cheeks flushed as she grew flustered. I nudged her in the side gently, getting her attention briefly.

"I'm kidding," I reassured, tilting my head her way playfully. "I actually love Paramore. They're my favourite band."

"Really?" she asked with surprise as I put the CD in her car. I hummed in response, to which she continued, "Have you ever seen them live?"

As For a Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic played quietly in the background, I nodded my head. "Yeah, once. It was a few years ago, but the tickets were shitty and I could just about make them out on stage in the distance."

Wanda laughed, the sound making my heart skip a beat. "No, that's so sad!"

I chuckled in agreement. "Yeah. It was, but oh well. They have a tour coming up this summer, right? Maybe I can get better tickets this time 'round... what about you? Have you ever seen them live?"

She hummed, making a turn at some traffic lights and chewing her lower lip as she focused on doing so. It was definitely the wrong time, but I found myself admiring how attractive it was, especially when her jaw tensed and her defined jawline was on display.

"Yeah, I saw them a few times," she finally responded, pulling me from my stupor. "Some really good seats, some really shitty ones." She giggled at the end, making me smile. "Maybe we could go to that concert in the summer. If you're up for it?"

This seemed like one of those times where you made plans with a friend that you knew would never happen, so to not cause an awkwardness in the conversation, I nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, maybe."

She glanced at me and I mirrored her smile, the flash of excitement in her eyes knocking me breathless.

When we reached her house, I was awestruck at how big it was from the inside. I mean, it looked huge from the outside, but the inside was even better. Her family were rich, I knew that, but this was some other level of rich.

"Here, c'mon, I'll get you a drink, then we can go into the dining room to start," Wanda said, failing to recognise my amazement and instead leading me to the kitchen. "We have tropical juice, apple juice, water, Sprite, Cola... which d'you want?"

I settled at the island, taking a seat and subtly admiring her kitchen. "Er, apple juice is fine with me."

She smiled brightly before pouring me a glass, whilst pouring herself some Sprite. Standing opposite me, we both took a moment to have a drink, but didn't get chance to exchange words as her mum entered the room and noticed me instantly.

"Y/N, it's so lovely to see you again!" she said kindly, patting me on the shoulder before heading to the fridge. "You girls hanging out? Studying?"

"We have a project," Wanda filled in as I nodded in agreement. "We alright to claim the dining room?"

After grabbing some water from the fridge, Wanda's mum pressed a kiss to her daughter's cheek. "Sure thing, sweetie. If you need anything, just let me know." Smiling once more at me, she said, "It's good to see you, Y/N."

"You too," I said with a friendly smile before she left.

"Come on," Wanda said, motioning for me to follow. "We have tons to do."

The next hour and a half was spent with Wanda and I planning out our project, our work sprawled along the dining table messily. We were making progress, until she got a call suddenly. It seemed serious as she gave me an apologetic glance and excused herself. I let her go and leaned back in my seat, wondering what I could do as I waited for her to return. That thought was resolved quite quickly when Pietro popped his head in the doorway and spotted me.

"Y/N! What an honour to welcome you to our humble abode," he exclaimed, entering the room fully. "What brings you here?"

Pietro's presence always brought an amused smile to my lips. "Wanda and I are working on a Chemistry project. She's just nipped out for a phone call."

He tutted dramatically, crossing his arms. "Well, well, well. We can't have that! Wanda needs to learn to entertain her guests. C'mon. I was about to head to the gaming room and could use the company."

I was visibly surprised. "You have a gaming room? Dude, that's awesome!"

He laughed. "C'mon."

Joining Pietro, the two of us headed to this so-called gaming room and I was not disappointed. There was a huge TV with a PlayStation and Nintendo Switch connected to it, a snooker table, a foosball table, a dart board, some old arcade games – it was amazing, any gamer's biggest dream.

"What you feeling, princess?" he said with that flirtatious smile of his.

I rolled my eyes playfully. He was being overtly flirty, more so than his sister was – was it a Maximoff personality trait or something? – and I wasn't sure whether he meant it or was just being his usual self.

"Are you flirting?" I deadpanned, tilting my head curiously. "I can't tell."

He pocketed his hands, swinging back on the heels of his feet. "That depends. Is it working?"

Despite my lack of interest in him like that, I felt my face heat up at the attention. "Pietro, I must tell you that any moves you attempt to make kind of won't work."

"And why's that?" he asked, sitting on the edge of the snooker table with a cheeky smile on his lips. "Am I not your type?"

"Unless you change into a girl, then no," I played along, making him flush with embarrassment. "Hate to break it to you, but I'm gay."

"Okay, I guess that makes sense," he mumbled to himself, before sighing and meeting my eyes. "We can still be friends, right? Or is that forbidden since you're already friends with my sister?"

I laughed and approached him. "Friends works. I don't think Wanda will care. I certainly don't."

He grinned. "Awesome! Well, d'you wanna play a round of foosball?"

"Sure," I said with an amused expression. "Bet I can kick your arse."

He pushed himself off the table and feigned surprise. "Oh? Game on, Y/L/N."

I didn't realise how long Wanda had been on the phone until I managed to get through three rounds of foosball and was in the middle of a snooker game with Pietro.

"You may have beat me at foosball, but you're terrible at this," he pointed out with stifled laughter.

I'd missed my third shot and it was more funny than it was embarrassing.

"Your talking distracts me," I said dismissively, before lining up the next shot with my cue.

He watched as I tried to take my shot before sighing loudly. I glanced at him with a quirked brow.

"You have a thought you'd like to share?" I asked playfully.

He hesitated, moving forward to correct my posture. "Look, if you just aim it like this–"

"Don't even think about it, Romeo," I said jokingly, standing up straight and pushing him away gently. "I know what you're thinking."

He laughed. "What? I was just going to help you aim!"

I gave him a knowing look. "So holding me close is just a bonus?"

"Fine, take your shot without my help and see what happens," he said dismissively, waving his hand.

"I'll do just that," I said with confidence, before bending down and taking my shot. The ball hit the other and neither were pocketed, which was an achievement as I'd got the cue ball in several times before, but still pretty shit as I didn't score any points.

Pietro smiled with satisfaction, leaning on his cue. "You happy with that?"

I held in a laugh as I looked to him. "Shut up."

He chuckled before bumping me out the way. "Now for the professional."

Bending down to take his shot, he pulled back his cue before hitting the balls. They rolled around on the table and one ball was about to go in, but I quickly grabbed it before he could get the point.

"Y/N!" he shouted between laughter. "That's cheating!"

"Technically we didn't establish rules," I pointed out, before moving backwards as he tried to grab it from my hand. "What do you say to calling it a draw and playing something else?"

"I say that's a childish way to admit you've lost," he responded, before moving forward quickly. I dodged his attempt and he pursed his lips. "Y/N."

"Pietro."

He smirked. "Seriously?"

I grinned.

He tried to grab it again and ended up chasing me around the room as I avoided giving in. Taking the piss out of Y/BF/N enough times had prepared me for moments like this, so I was able to avoid Pietro long enough to run into whoever walked through the door.

"Shit, Wanda, I'm sorry," I said between laughter, steadying both me and her.

She smiled with confusion, about to speak, but Pietro caught up to me and lifted me up, throwing me onto the couch before I could protest.

"No more cheating," he said sternly, as I lifted my head from the pile of cushions on the couch to look up at him.

"You're an arse," I said, pushing myself up off the couch.

"And you're a sore loser!"

We had a mini staring competition before the two of erupted into laughter.

"You're not half bad, Pietro," I complimented as he helped me up.

"Thank you, princess," he said, the flirtatious smile on his lips again.

I shoved him in the shoulder playfully before looking to Wanda, who was chewing on her lip as she looked between Pietro and I with an unreadable expression.

"So, what prompted you to leave Y/N alone for an hour?" Pietro asked, wrapping an arm around my shoulder, making me shove him away. He grinned at me before looking to Wanda.

"Nate called," Wanda responded carefully, arms crossed as she continued to look between us. God, I hoped she didn't think Pietro and I liked each other. That would be embarrassing.

Pietro scoffed from beside me, making Wanda sigh with annoyance.

"Don't start, Piet," she said and gave him a look which he seemed to understand.

By the sounds of it, Pietro didn't seem to like Wanda's dick of a boyfriend either. That was strange since wasn't impressing the brother the first part of being in a relationship with someone? And they were on the same football team, so I figured he'd at least tolerate him.

"Are we alright to get back to studying?" Wanda asked, directing her stare to me. The annoyance she held for Pietro was still present in her eyes and I suddenly felt nervous when she looked my way.

"Yeah, of course," I said, before giving Pietro a half-smile. "Rematch at snooker next time. Sound good?"

"Try to keep the balls on the table and we'll see," he teased, before nodding to Wanda. "You should get back to your project before Wanda kills us both with her deadly glare."

I smiled awkwardly, looking back to Wanda as she was indeed glaring at her brother. Clearly there was some sibling rivalry going on here, and I definitely didn't want to get in the middle of it, so I headed to Wanda, signalling I was ready to leave.

The two of us headed back to the dining room in an uncomfortable silence. I felt like I'd done something wrong and she was giving me the silent treatment which was strange. Then I figured it was probably something with Nate that made her annoyed, so didn't question it too much.

We sat back down and I looked at what we'd done so far to try and pick up where we left off, but then she spoke out of the blue, taking me by surprise.

"Do you like my brother?"

It was so abrupt that I took a moment to acknowledge it, blinking. "What?"

"Pietro," she clarified, saying it with such dismissiveness like it wasn't a big deal. Her attention was on the books before us as she continued, "Do you like him?"

I tried not to laugh as I shook my head. "No, Wanda. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's a great guy. But yeah, no, I don't like him like that."

She chewed her lip, nodding, but I swear I saw a hint of a smile on her lips. I hoped it wasn't the thought of Pietro and I that made her annoyed. I wasn't that bad, was I? I know she cared about her brother and was probably overprotective, but me being his girlfriend couldn't have been that bad, right?

We got back to work in no time, getting a lot done. I didn't realise how late it was getting until Wanda's mum poked her head in, asking if I wanted to stay for dinner.

"Dinner?" I asked, eyebrows raising with surprise. I checked my watch and realised how long I'd been here. "Damn, maybe I should head back."

"Nonsense, you must stay," her mum insisted. "Y/M/N won't mind. A daughter of hers is a daughter of mine."

"You can even sleepover if you want," Wanda offered, and I almost choked on my own spit. "It's getting pretty late."

I shook my head, forcing a small smile so they wouldn't get offended. "Honestly, it's fine. I can head back."

"Please?" Wanda asked with a hopeful expression. "It's the least I can do. I kinda wasted your time for an hour earlier..."

"I should ask my mum," I said, chewing on the inside of my mouth.

"Oh, I'll ring and let her know," Wanda's mum said breezily, before looking to Wanda. "D'you think you can clear your things up? Your brother is gonna set the table."

"Sure, mum." Wanda smiled her way as she left, before looking to me. "I've got clothes and a spare toothbrush you can use tonight."

I smiled awkwardly, nodding. Sleeping over at my crush's house wasn't how I thought I'd be spending my Wednesday evening, yet here we were.

#wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda maximoff #elizabeth olsen #marvel imagine #mcu imagine #marvel #mcu

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tootiredmotel · 3 years

Text

Give him the real thing

For @floral-cas 's event!!! First time writing from an outsider/oc's pov so bear with me. Huge huge congrats on your milestone K!!! You are a PILAR of this lil community and we all love you 💚🌺💚🌺💚🌺

Read on ao3. 1.7k words

"Alright, uh… confession. I got no idea what I'm doin' here."

He looked around the shop like a monster was about to pop out of any corner. Like the carnations were going to bite him and the pots lined up on the windowsill next to them would come to life and crush his feet. The poor guy looked terrified, but it's nothing Maya hadn't handled before.

"That's what I'm here for. What's your name?" She asked, sensing they'd be there a while.

"Dean."

On any other day, Maya would've been resenting a burly, middle-aged guy with no idea what he wanted coming into the shop twenty minutes before closing, especially on a Thursday. Jade had their A.A. meetings on Thursdays so Maya was alone for the evening. But this Dean guy? He looked so lost, so nervous, so utterly out of place. There was something else about him that made her want to help, too. Maya wasn't sure what, but she'd figure it out.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Maya. Let's start with this: why are you here today, Dean?"

"Anniversary tomorrow."

Concise and to the point. Maya made a mental note. She also noted how he wiped his palms on his jeans and clenched his jaw. Nerves.

"How many years have you been together?"

That got a smile out of him. "A lot. A whole lot. But this is, uh. First wedding anniversary."

She donned a wide smile. "Congratulations. That's wonderful."

"Yeah. Thanks, thank you." He stuffed his hands in his pockets, still not meeting her eyes.

"Doing anything special?"

"Nothin' fancy. My brother and his wife are taking the kiddo for the night so, picnic in the backyard, lookin' at the stars, all that cheesy romantic crap."

His words didn't match his tone. It was evident Dean was absolutely smitten, Maya recognized the look, and he was making an effort. He was filled to the brim with giddiness and adoration for this person, and it shone through from him just thinking about them. Jade still looked at Maya like that every morning and night, and so did Maya at them. Every day since freshman year of college. Maya's chest swelled.

"Thing is," Dean continued, a bit more relaxed now. "Cas knows all about this stuff. We got this huge garden behind the house that I'm not allowed to even touch. There's a million books about nature and trees and flower meanings on the shelf, and Cas has read all of 'em. I didn't even know flowers had meanings, I don't know jack shit about any of it, but…"

"You want to impress Cas."

"I wanna impress Cas. It's gotta be good."

"You've come to the right place then." Maya kept an eye on Dean as she circled the counter. He was studying the pride flags hanging in the window with a clenched jaw, and Maya went on alert. She pulled out the binder they kept in the drawer and plopped it down in front of him a little harder than she needed to, calling his attention. "My partner Jade is more of a nerd about this stuff than I am, but they made this for situations like these."

Dean read the cover, Jade and Maya's Quick Guide to Flower Meanings, and smiled. "Nice."

They spent forty-five minutes walking around the store, binder in hand, slowly constructing the message Dean wanted to convey with his bouquet. He was adamant on it containing blue, so Maya went for the Forget-me-nots first. “Love and hope,” said the binder, which she deemed fitting enough for a first wedding anniversary.

Dean looked like someone content with his life, and he agreed when Maya suggested they look under the happiness category. “Well, Cas makes me happy,” he said, and they settled on Felicias, also blue.

Dean eventually got comfortable enough and leaned over to look at the binder in Maya’s hands. “Think there’s anything in there for grace?”

Highly specific, but possible, Maya thought. “Let’s find out.”

And they did. Plumerias, white.

“Anything else?” She asked him. Dean donned a thousand-yard stare as he thought about it, and Maya figured this man had been through a lot. More than she could ever imagine. She was glad he’d found some peace.

“Freedom,” Dean said finally. Freesias, white as well.

It was an odd bouquet, Maya admitted, but Dean was an odd man, and he looked happy with it. He was still nervous, still out of his element, but there was more excitement in the twinkle of his eyes than anything else.

“Cas will love it,” Maya assured him, and he beamed. She still knew very little about this Cas person— Dean could speak a lot without really saying anything, careful and reserved, even dancing around using gendered pronouns for Cas, which Maya found interesting—, but she could see Dean was living a happy life as their husband. That was good enough for her.

“Here’s hoping,” he said as he handed over his credit card, but he seemed a lot more sure than hopeful. He knew Cas would like it, and Maya couldn’t help a sense of pride grow inside her. Dean also put some cash in the tip jar and left with a smile. A good day’s work, and maybe a new friend in town.

---

“Maya?"

"Yeah, sweetheart?"

Jade poked their head in the door, beaming at Maya as she ran the books in the back room.

"There's a gentleman asking for you."

"By name?"

Jade nodded. Maya sent them a questioning look, to which they just shrugged. If Jade wasn't all that worried about it, Maya supposed there was no reason for her to be either. She made her way out, squeezing Jade's hip as she passed them, and stepped up to the counter. The trenchcoat-clad man smiled at her.

"Maya?"

The depth of his voice caught her by surprise, but she recovered in time to reply "That's me."

The man smiled wider. "It's a pleasure to meet you, my name is Cas. You might not remember, but last week you-"

"Did you say Cas?" Maya couldn't contain her interruption, or the eagerness as she asked: "Dean's Cas?"

Cas's smile widened even more, which she didn't think was possible. It was blinding, and Maya, even in all her queerness, could definitely understand what Dean saw in him. "That's right."

Dean’s fixation on blue flowers suddenly made sense too, as she noticed his eyes. "He adores you, you know. You're his heaven and earth."

Cas's smile faltered at her words, and Maya feared she'd said something wrong.

"I'm sorry if I'm overstepping."

“No, no, it’s alright.” He looked down at his wedding band, and his smile returned. “He’s all that and more to me.”

Cas stared at his ring for a second longer. It was silver and had a small blue gem embedded into it. Maya could swear it appeared to swirl with light.

“Dean spoke wonders of you,” she said.

He looked back up at her. “You, too.”

She blinked in surprise at that.

“I loved the bouquet. I thanked him for it, over and over, and every time he said you were the miracle worker. That he was clueless the whole time and couldn’t have done it without you.”

“That’s not true,” Maya deflected, a steady heat rising to her cheeks. “He had a pretty good idea of what he wanted. And, if anything, he and I couldn’t have done it without Jade’s expertise.” She gestured toward her partner, helping a customer at the other end of the shop, and also tapped the binder, which was out on the countertop today.

“Then I suppose I’m here to thank both of you.”

He reached into a tote bag that Maya hadn’t noticed he was carrying and pulled out a plastic container. “We run a small baking business out of our home. These are on me. Apple and honey tarts.” He placed the container in front of her. On top of it was a label that read D&C’s Pastries. “They are also gluten-free, just in case.“

“What’s going on?” Jade asked, approaching Maya’s side with an expectant smile.

“Jade, love, do you remember Dean? From last week?”

“You told me about him, yeah, wedding anniversary.”

“Well this is Cas,” she gestured to him.

“Dean's husband,” Cas interjected. Jade and Maya shared a knowing smile. “I just wanted to drop these off as a thank you for helping Dean. Apple and honey tarts, gluten-free.”

“That is so sweet of you,” Jade exclaimed, eagerly taking the pastries. Maya rolled her eyes fondly at the pun, which Cas didn’t seem to catch.

“I was just doing my job,” Maya said. “But thank you.”

“Papa!”

They all turned to the child, blond and adorable, running excitedly toward Cas. At the door, where the child came from, stood an exasperated Dean.

“Jack,” Cas started, scooping the child in his arms. Jack wrapped his arms around Cas’s neck. “I thought I told you and Daddy to wait for me at the café, I wasn’t going to be long.”

“He missed you. We both did,” Dean gazed at him as he approached. “Dude, what are you-”

Dean scanned over the scene he’d just walked into and seemed to realize what was happening.

“So that’s what the tarts were for. Hey, Maya.”

“Hi, Dean.”

“And you must be Jade,” Dean said, extending a hand toward them.

“Yes! Heard about you, nice to finally meet you, Dean.”

“You too. You and that book of yours are life-savers. If I’d known the tarts were for you guys, I would’a made more.”

“These are more than enough, thank you. In fact, here...” Maya turned to a vase of daisies they had on a shelf and pulled out three. “Now I feel like we’re even.”

“Not by a long shot,” Dean said as he took his flower and Cas’s. He put his behind his ear, and Cas’s in his trenchcoat’s lapel, as Maya handed Jack his own flower.

They all promised to not be strangers, and kept their promise. Dean and Cas would bring over baked goods, and in exchange, Jade and Maya would let them take home a potted plant for their garden. Jack would always leave with a small flower in his hand, a different one every time, wrapped in Cas’s arms as he explained the flower’s origins or symbolism to his son. Dean would be the last one out the door, always turning back and mouthing a “thank you” to Maya. Every time, without fail.

And every time, Maya would think that she wanted what they had. Happiness, peace, a family, unconditional and true love. And every time, she would look over at Jade, and know she was well on her way.

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