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wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart · 10 months

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Yet another average day in Family Video:

"Hey. Remember when you said that you'd totally fuck Jonathan."

"When...? Oh, yeah. What the fuck that was literally a month ago why are you mentioning that now?"

"Because that was the same conversation we decided to get the matching tramp stamps. And trying to hide those from my parents is a literal pain in the ass. Pun fully intended. I can't even sit straight and-"

"I'd say you can't do anything straight"

"Not like I can do anything str- fuck you"

Steve swaggers to the back and takes out the whiteboard they purchased together - on ROBIN'S SUGGESTION may he add.

"Can't believe you're losing in your own game. About bad jokes. And being gay. Which are basically your two only personality traits."

Robin's side is embarrassingly empty. He sees it as cosmic karma for her you-suck-game during their scoops ahoy era.

"Alright mister little bitch"

"And yet, this little bitch is beating you in your own game"

Robin shows him the finger. Steve bites the finger because he is a little shit and things like boundaries and personal space have already lost all meaning between the two of them.

In this moment the front doors open. The elderly man takes one look at the scene before him and leaves without a word.

"Where did the Jonathan thing come from?"

"Dunno. I was bored. Thought it'd be funny to see you go through a gay crisis."

"Not much of a crisis if I already admitted to it."

"You're no fun."

"Really? That was not what my dad said three months ago. According to him I am a fucking joke."

"Coming from Harrington Senior that's honestly a compliment"

"Please remind me of that the next time I radio you at 3 am. Who is on tape duty?"

"I did it last time."

"Alright" Steve nods towards the small pile of romcoms they have pointedly not been reshelving for the last half an hour. "Enjoy your alone time in the romance section."

"Do you think it would be an invasion of privacy if we checked who returned all that? It was either an epic girls night of an awful breakup." Her voice gets fainter as she moves to the back of the store.

"Nah. We're in the land of the free or whatever. Wait, let me do it"

"You're only saying that so you can procrastinate asshole"

"Does that mean you don't want to know who took them? Because I promise you, you really really do."

"Don't ask if you already know the answer dingus"

"Guess"

"Ummm....power bottom."

"What?"

"Like with Jonathan. Would you rather he call the shots or the other way around?"

She makes a series of incomprehensible movements that are probably supposed to represent intercourse between two men.

"This is the reason god made you a lesbian"

"And thank him for that. Amen."

"Why are you so obsessed with Jonathan anyway."

"You're deflecting"

"Yeah sure, I am deflecting. C'mon, Buckley. Resume or later?"

"Who was the one who took all the romcoms?"

"If I tell you, will you tell me what's really going on?"

"Depends on your answer."

"I thought you weren't interested in my sex life? Every time-"

In this moment the door opens again. Two girls come in, arm in arm. One is wearing a look that can only be described as disgust, the other is clearly trying to hold in laughter with moderate success.

Over the course of many painful months of customer service (plus surviving an interrogation by the actual Russian secret service) Steve and Robin have developed the ability to hold entire conversations without speaking a single word. It is a very neat talent to have when they want to make fun of someone right in front of them. It is less neat when he is the target.

Robin raises her brows. C'mon dingus, tell these random ass girls about your sex life since you're so proud of it.

Steve frowns in response. Yeah, sure Mrs. Never Even Had A First Kiss.

Robin narrows her eyes. I did have a first kiss. Even if it was absolutely horrible.

Steve puts on his most insufferable expression. You yourself said that it doesn't count. No need to be so jealous Buckley.

Robin rolls her eyes. Alright, I want to see you trying to find a-

"Do you have ET?", Robin doesn't say because, oh yeah, they've got actual customers.

Steve solemnly informs them that ET is current out of stock, but that it should be returned in two days. Robin somehow manages to force her last two movies upon them. They leave with a dazed look on their face that Steve can relate to. Sometimes Robin will start talking and the next thing you know you have a tramp stamp.

"Tommy Hagan"

Robin looks absolutely disgusted. "Tommy Hagan?! You would kiss Tommy Hagan? And then you have the audacity to make fun of my taste in women?!"

"First of all: me and Hagan? Been there done that." Robin looks as if her entire worldview was just flipped upside down. "Second: probably not, he uses a bit too much tongue for my liking. I mean that Tommy Hagan was the one who rented all the romcoms"

Robin takes a moment to process this information. Then she dramatically falls to the floor and squirms around in laughter like a bug on its back trying to get up again. Truly a drama kid through and through.

"And thirdly: for your information, I super could make out with Jonathan Byers. Unlike you, I've got game"

"You don't mean gay-me?"

Steve rolls his eyes and takes out the whiteboard again. He is still in the lead.

"And also, excuse you, I totally could make out with Nancy if I wanted to, okay?! I'm just not a homewrecker unlike some other people"

"Excuse me? I was the one who was cheated on?!"

"I'm insulting your taste, dingus"

"Rich coming from you, since we apparently share the same one"

For a moment she looks confused. Then she thinks back to what she said. Steve can pinpoint the exact moment she realizes it.

"Is this the reason you want me to be into Jonathan so bad? Because you're into Nancy?" Steve feels like a smug cat when her entire upper body grows red.

"Shut up she's just pretty okay?!"

"And badass. Don't forget badass."

"Oh my god I know. Ever since I saw her shooting I haven't been able to get her out of my mind."

"Right?! And as if that isn't enough, she has to go and be smart too! Like, c'mon, she has to have some faults. Some downsides. Nobody is that prefect!"

"Oh my god I know! And-"

They continue like that for a while. Time runs away from them and suddenly Hellfire Club is over and Steve's kids (minus Max, he notes with a heavy heart) are barging into the place as if they own it, for no reason other than to be absolute menaces.

"And like. Robin. She was so hot in that moment. I swear to-"

"Who are you talking about?". Steve is used to Dustin being a rude little shit and automatically answers without even thinking about it. "Nancy."

He realizes his mistake too late. He looks up. Mike's eyes are wide in horror. "I hate you so fucking much" he says before turning around and leaving.

Robin sighs. "I guess that is the downside."

-> the tramp stamp conversation

-> gatekeeping 101

-> breaking out of a heteronormative mindset

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another-white-void · 4 months

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Btw I was making a list of my favorite moments while reading Thousand Autumns. So. Here it is (under the cut bc spoilers)

- Yu Shengyan as a silly poet

- Yan Wushi threatening Shen Qiao with lip cup (ch 24) AND THEN SHEN QIAO FEEDING HIM THAY WAY IN CH 57

- Bian Yanmei vs Huo Xijing in a tea shop (ch 27)

- Yan Wushi introduces unconscious Shen Qiao to Bian Yanmei (ch 29)

- Yan Wushi: this is my husband, Shen Qiao, Shen Qiao: sect leader Yan, you need to stop call that lowly one your husband. we met yesterday

- chapter 34. just. chapter 34 (Zhan Ziqian is my second fav now)

- chapter 35, Yan Wushi pulling "was your name on it???" as an argument for stealing

- chapter 44, Yan Wushi asking Shen Qiao if they could be friemds

- chapter 46, abbot saying that Shen Qiao finally lost his mind

- chapter 49, Ruan Hailou suicide speech (+thinking about their next incarnations ok)

- chapter 50, Shen Qiao's epic entrance

- chapter 55, Dou Yanshan laughing his ass off bc Shen Qiao put “Yan Wushi” and “greater good” in one sentence

- chapter 55, Guang Lingsan pulling “u manwhore we're not gay, we won't do anything for u” on Shen Qiao

- chapter 55, Guang Lingsan has a sword hidden in his cither!! he tossed a cither and took the sword from inside of it!!! how cool is that!!!!

- chapter 55, Dou Yanshan's “Sayonara weeboos!”. yes chapter 55 IS a work of art

- chapter 58, Yu Ai finally understanding that he lost Shen Qiao forever and there's no going back, saying “Good, good, good...”

- chapter 67, Yan Wushi asked about his traveling goal responds “I'm following you [Shen Qiao]" CUTE

- chapter 70, Yan Wushi in drag refusing to leave the restaurant without Shen Qiao

- chapter 75, Yan Wushi making dinner for Shen Qiao, this is so cute, I fucking can't, the whole chapter is so wholesome, I love it

- chapters 79-80, Shen Qiao crying because Yan Wushi decided to save him and trying to run after him,

- chapter 84, Murong Qin saying “If your dao had any use whatsoever, why hasn’t that wonderful man you love so much shown himself yet?” to Shen Qiao and Shen Qiao not denying anything,

- and generally the fight with Murong Qin, it's so beautifully described...

- chapter 84, describing Yan Ying as “he was an expert at risking his life on the battlefield” (and generally Yan Ying I love that man gender neutral, he wants to die for someone SO BADLY)

- chapter 85, Yan Shou scared as fuck

- chapter 85, Shen Qiao vs Chen Gong & Baoyun would look AMAZING in animation

- chapter 86, Shen Qiao saying he's Shan Qiaozi... giving Finrod vibes. Sweetheart, you're not best in disguises are you,

- chapter 90, Yan Wushi's internal monologue about Shen Qiao

- chapter 94, Yan Wushi and Shen Qiao's spoon fight,

- chapter 94, Shen Qiao finally loosing it,

- chapter 97, “This venerable one's weakness now is you!”... what a way to confess...

- chapter 101, Gu Hengbo has major lesbian vibes oh my god

- chapter 102, OH MY GOD YU SHENGYAN IS BACK

- chapter 103, Yuan Xiuxiu standing on a flag, this is kinda cool and girlboss

- chapter 103, Yuan Xiuxiu dominated by ocean-like power of Shen Qiao

- chapter 106, Yan Wushi literally saying that Shen Qiao isn't like the other girls

- chapter 107, Yan Wushi confessing his love, saying that his heart is Shen Qiao's, talking about marriage and right after that being like "taki żarcik kosmonaucik" yeah sure thing bro

- chapter 110, “grandmasters were not cabbage” yeah can't argue with that

- chapter 110, Bian Yanmei genderfuckery and absolutely loving to dress and act like a woman, what a legend

- chapter 115, Yuan Ying... poor baby... how did they not notice that you were gone for a week...

- chapter 117, Yan Wushi fighting basically all the most powerful people in the world for Shen Qiao dkddskkd

- chapter 118, Shen Qiao waiting for the most dramatic moment to enter the elders' meeting lol + Bian Yanmei living for the applause

- chapter 120, Yu Ai's death, that was so damn sad how am I supposed to not cry??

- chapter 121, Shen Qiao and Bian Yanmei as besties so cute, exactly what I needed after that Yu Ai trauma

- aaand we're back with trama, this time it's Tan Yuanchun. Poor Shen Qiao, took him long enough to understand that he lives in an imperfect world, convoluted in thousands small matters that pile up to hatreage and cruelty

- chapter 122, Shen Qiao's “I know, but if I can’t see him, how can I be at peace?” T^T

- it might be one of my fav chapters, so causally wholesome

- chapter 123, how differently Shen Qiao treats Yan Wushi and Bai Rong. Yan Wushi is in the end the only person who can make Shen Qiao so explicitly emotional

- chapter 124, A SMALL DEAR A-QIAO THIS IS

NOT A DRILL IT'S A SMALL DEAR A-QIAO!!

- Yan Wushi saying "Thank you for returning my badness with kindness", my heart is melting

- chapter 126, Shen Qiao gambling. and unknowingly cheating. it is just. too percect. I love this novel

- this is just autism x ADHD and I'm living for this

- god their declaration of love being “thank you for returning my evilness with kindness” and “I would cry only if you died, not anyone else”

#thousand autumns #qian qiu #yan wushi #shen qiao

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jeroidk · 2 years

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Maybe it's because i finished vol.2 just like an hour ago and because i feel empty inside and not in a good way but

Even without the queerbaiting, i feel like this episodes were just awful.

Mike had a total of 0 development, 0 depth. Actually, i feel like they fucked up the development he had in the previous seasons and vol.1

His life started when he met El in the woods? Did they really just reduced him to Eleven's love interest when he used to be the main character? When he had the most beautiful friendship with Will in s1-s2?

Mike is his own whole person. "My life started when i met you" my ass. What happened to "you said yes. It was the best thing i've ever done"???? Talk about ruining a character.

And they didn't even gave us an explanation as to why he was acting like an asshole? All of that just because he couldn't say "i love you" to El because of no reason at all? Was the "because what if they don't like the truth?" just for nothing?

And don't even get me started on the painting reveal. It had SO much potential, it could have been such an important moment for both Mike and Will's development but it didn't do anything. Noah gave such an amazing performance with the crying and the speech but it lead to nothing. Will is just the "sad gay in love with his best friend" trope. At least he had a little beautiful moment with Jonathan, so i guess that's something.

But they didn't even adressed Will's sexuality at all. It was kept in the subtext. We all know Will is gay but they didn't commit to his plot line. I'm not even asking about a full-on coming out scene for various reasons but they could have made a scene like when Robin came out to Steve. She didn't need to say "i'm a lesbian" but the message was there, loud and clear. But no, Will didn't deserve that apparently, even when that's all the plot line he had this season because he keeps getting pushed to the side. HE USED TO BE A MAIN CHARACTER. I HATE THIS.

And his cute speech to Mike was used for Mileven? Just so Mike could say "i love you" to her? It's that all gay people can expect when it comes to representation in a mainstream show? To be used to build a hetero couple that's been falling for 2 seasons?

And the Stancy plot line lead to nothing. And Jancy is still just there, existing, slowly losing all that made them super likeable in the first seasons.

And they killed Max, but now El has healing powers? What the fuck was that, it felt so deux-ex-machina. Also, i'm sorry if some of you found it good, but the whole piggyback felt so anticlimatic to me. Why was there a memory from little max??? It didn't serve any purpose???

And we had this villain who can literally feed on people's trauma, which was the most awesome scenario to reveal what's been going on inside Mike's head, but no, all we had was just another epic fight between El and the big bad, like every season.

What a waste of time.

#stranger things 4 #stranger things 4 vol.2 spoilers #stranger things spoilers #mike wheeler #will byers #byler #vecna

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clyde49 · 1 month

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I've been writing Space Ghost fanfiction. If you don't want to leave Tumblr the fic is under the read more

“You know some days I wish we were just boring lesbians.”

Moltar was reeling after what he considered another epic battle with his nemesis Space Ghost. They saw each other by random chance in the parking lot of this, kinda dive buffet restaurant on the edge of town and Space Ghost had chased Moltar to an empty parking lot a few blocks down. They battled each other for a bit before once again they both got tuckered out and just crashed on the sidewalk. Space Ghost typically said some sort of weird shit afterwards but “boring lesbians” was a new one.

“What?”

Space Ghost just laid on his back looking up before gesturing his head to look at his adversary as much as he could without sitting up. He wasn't as scuffed up after the fight as Moltar wanted but he rarely was.

“Like, some days I wish we could both be mundane women who love each other and sit around watching movies or whatever lesbians do. Instead of just doing this every time we see each other outside of work. Like don't get me wrong I love combat to the death until we both get tired, but like. In another life we are probably both just people who love each other instead of freaks that beat each other up.”

“If we were boring lesbians we'd both wish we were aliens freaks beating eachother up.”

There was a moment of silence before Space Ghost responded.

“You think so?”

“Trust me. I've talked to enough lesbians, most of them I've met want to be kaijus.”

Moltar let it bubble in his head that none of his problems would really go away if he was a human woman. if anything he'd have more problems. He'd still worry about his family hating him and social awkwardness and his job. He just knows he'd get in more trouble when he sets shit on fire. Supervillains always get more mileage out of crime than normal people.

“It's a “grass is always greener” thing, Ghost. Plus I don't think there's anything lesbians can do that we can't.”

Moltar looked back at where Space Ghost was only to see that he was starting to stand back up.

“That's true, but It would be nice to just hang out for once. Watch a movie or play a board game or something.”

“We can hang out, I'm busy tomorrow but-”

“What are you doing tomorrow?”

Moltar processed if Space Ghost was just really curious about his schedule or accusing him of planning something illegal. Regardless, the shithead was walking towards him.

“Me and the boys were going to the arcade. They got this new fish game we are all excited to try.”

“Could I come with you?”

“Dude it's going to be like, Zorak and Metallus.”

“I know them.”

Moltar let out a heavy sigh as the disaster of how bringing Space Ghost as a one plus would go formed in his imagination. Zorak was more than enough to worry about. Moltar knew if he brought both the bug and the ghost to the arcade with him that the “Fishmaster XD: Fish of Darkness” machine wouldn't make it long enough for anyone to enjoy the new game.

“They don't like you. Technically, I don't even like you. If anything I hate you more than I hate most people.“

Space Ghost was hovering over Moltar at that point and Moltar could tell by the sad sack look on his face he was debating between helping him up, kicking him while he was down or just leaving.

“Would you like me if I was normal?”

Moltar laughed at that one.

“I wouldn't even look at you if you were normal.”

The Ghosts expression softened.

“Well I'm glad I'm Space Ghost then.”

Space Ghost offered Moltar a hand and Moltar graciously took the support as he stood back up himself.

For a while they just stood there together, looking at each other. Space Ghost always had this faint, almost glow to him. Moltar didn't have an exact word for it, but it was like he had VHS warmth filtered over his personal aura. Moltar knew himself to also be glowing and warm on the inside, underneath his hazard suit, but most people wouldn't know that. The Ghost would, but most people wouldn't. Space Ghost broke the silence after a long moment.

“How often do we do this?”

“Huh?”

“Our whole “fighting randomly in public” thing?”

“I think this is the fifth time in three months.”

Space Ghost seemed to look over at nothing before looking back at Moltar.

“Hey Moltar, did you eat dinner before we started this? because I didn't and I'm still hungry. If anything I'm hungrier now. How about you?”

Moltar would never admit it but he was really glad Space Ghost asked.

“yeah sorry about that, I haven't eaten yet either. I just saw ya and.”

“You threw a fireball at me and yelled a lot so I started chasing you, and we both know the rest.”

“Yeah”

Space Ghost started doing that dumb little smile he always did when a thought somehow snuck into his brain without shriveling up on the way in and had been flourishing for a bit in his empty skull.

“You know Moltar, if you're still hungry, I'll buy for us both. if you would want to share a table with me”

Moltar would never admit this either, but even after everything, he felt giddy about the idea of dinner with Space Ghost.

“Eh, why not, as long as you're buying.”

“I have more than enough cash for two all-you-can-eat meals and a good tip. Plus I've got some ones if you want to try their crane machine game.”

“I've tried it, it kinda sucks but I'll gladly waste your money on it anyway.”

They both looked around the empty parking lot they found themselves in.

“Ok, what direction was the restaurant again?”

Moltar hummed to himself a bit.

“I have no idea.”

#space ghost #space ghost coast to coast #moltar #adult swim #sgc2c #Adult Swim fanfiction

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pjharvey · 9 months

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Im sharing my therapy discussions publicly online here like some kind of idiot like what ive realized is that i was in a relationship that was Pretty Good and like a relationship should be more than Pretty Good. and if i am going to be in a relationship that is Totally Awesome Epic Style it will not be with a man. idk maybe that makes me a lesbian? but also ik a lot of lesbians are like eugh dating/having sex with men sounds gross and i am personally like Eh its alright we had some good times. i actually like very much liked the sex he was very good at sex. regardless of how i identify which tbh is not that important to me in this moment in time i cannot ever see myself with a man again like i think that chapter of my life is over

#like i don’t have any trauma from that relationship and i don’t regret having dated or slept w him in the slightest #it just wasn’t meant to last

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i-did-not-mean-to · 11 months

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Will you do lesbian rep with Dis and Dwarf OC/Reader? Please!

Of course, dear anon, I can do that :)

Soon

Words: 1.5 k

Characters: Dís x OC

Warnings: Implicit homophobia, hesitation, slight sadness

Prompt: Lesbian Rep

“I am not sure about this,” Sami whispered, her hand twitching nervously as she smoothed down her formal dress. “You are a princess.”

“Sure,” Dís replied with a bright smile, “and, with you by my side, I’m even a queen. Or do you think me in any way inferior to my mulish brother?”

Seeing the challenging gleam in those sapphire eyes, Sami had to chuckle despite the debilitating knot in her stomach—after all, it had been the pugnacious resilience of the dam at her side that had first caught her attention and then her heart.

“Evidently not,” she replied soothingly. “Thorin has nothing on you—he’s a mere hill compared to a mountain, he’s but a coin and you’re a treasure…”

Dís threw her head back and laughed so heartily that Sami believed that the very foundations of the Lonely Mountain must have been echoing with her joy.

“We share a complexion though, so you better not say that he’s unattractive,” Dís added with a wink before taking Sami’s shaking hand and encasing it safely in her own broad palm.

“I have never given the king much thought, I must admit,” Sami conceded with a half-hearted shrug.

She had been born on the road and had never known Thorin very well as they had lived exceedingly different lives—as a male dwarf and the heir to a lost throne, he had been preoccupied mainly with the defence and the well-being of his people while Sami had known her own, much more intimate and much less consequential struggles.

Dams were rare and precious—this had been impressed upon her for as long as she could remember and while she had never been interested in warfare, she had dabbled in different crafts in the desperate hope to escape the bane of matrimony by becoming indispensable to some master or another.

Indeed, for reasons she had not been able to fully understand at that time, the mere thought of taking a husband and bearing his children filled her with cold dread, and Sami would have done much to avoid ending up in a situation in which her only choice was to either forfeit her happiness or humiliate her parents in an unforgivable manner.

When she had not shown much talent or exceptional skill in any of the domains she had been looking into, her parents had made a desperate last-ditch effort to find her a place where she would be safe by petitioning the young prince to allow their daughter to become part of his sister’s entourage.

Sami had—until that day—been highly doubtful when it came to the unwavering faith her family had in Mahal; she had found it extremely unlikely that some remote entity would truly take an interest in someone as unimportant as she was, but—upon glimpsing Princess Dís for the first time—she was converted lastingly.

Dís had been and still was the single most beautiful being Sami had ever beheld. Regal in deportment and speech, she had a fiery temperament and a quick wit that had led to many an epic squabble with her esteemed brother.

From the very start, they had gotten along splendidly. Under Dís’ care, Sami slowly started to thaw out of the fearful immobility she had maintained all her life, terrified of disappointing or dishonouring her parents by speaking up at the wrong moment or contradicting the wrong person.

Being of the uncontested royal line of old, Dís had never known such qualms—she was an accomplished diplomat and a charming host, of course, but she didn’t hesitate to make her voice and her opinion heard either.

Moreover, they soon discovered that they shared a feeling of frustration linked to the fact that—as female representatives of their family tree—they were side-lined and pushed aside much too often in favour of counsellors and leeches who did not have the realm’s and the population’s best interest at heart.

From this helpless anger as much as from the many hours spent in companionable study, arose a deep and steady friendship and soon, Dís and Sami relied upon one another unconditionally.

Neither one knew when their complicity had bloomed into something else—more illicit and far more passionate than was conceivable for two well-born ladies—it had been a slow development that endured Dís’ wedding and widowhood, the birth of her sons, and the fateful departure of the company to reconquer Erebor, but, throughout the lonely months of waiting and fretting, they had created a bubble of intimacy and mutual solace that they were now loath to burst.

“This is a bad idea, Dís, my beloved,” Sami tried to reason with the one she had devoted her whole life to. “You are the king’s sister, the heir’s mother—you are the most precious of invaluable dams in the kingdom…and I am but me, a child abandoned to the endless mercy of your house. This cannot be how I repay Durin’s line for their generosity.”

Scoffing, Dís tightened one of her braids. “I have never had a bad idea in my life,” she declared decisively and lifted Sami’s hand to her lips. “I am my own person and I have my own mind.”

“Please,” the other pleaded, her eyes sparkling like gems slumbering at the bottom of a lake. “Remember all the practical jokes we’ve played on your brothers—your intuition is far from flawless.”

“I stand by my actions,” Dís asseverated. “I always do.”

With a deep sigh, Sami allowed herself to let her brow sink against Dís’ shoulder; she loved the princess for her bravery and her self-assured determination, but she was also afraid that her own selfish wish to be with one so far above her own station would end up costing Dís, the king, and their fragile kingdom more than they were able to lose.

The sound of approaching steps echoed from the high walls and Sami jerked upright, staggering back a few paces instinctively—she desperately tried to ignore the hurt flaring in those deep, blue eyes she so loved, telling herself that it was all for the best if they were not caught unawares by a passing patrol or some tardy guests on their way to the feast.

“I have done my duty,” Dís hissed, “and I deserve to live my life the way I want.”

“For the love you bear your brother, in the name of your duty towards your people,” Sami begged under her breath, “do not speak up just yet. The realm is fragile and Thorin needs you by his side—a symbol of hope, of fertility, of a bright future—and we owe him our silence. For now…”

She knew and adored the scowl of impatience spreading across Dís’ beautiful face and so, Sami smiled through the tears threatening to overflow from her burning eyes.

“I will be there, by your side, the way I always have—I will not desert you to let you fulfil a destiny we had almost given up on all alone,” she promised vehemently, tucking the bead Dís had plaited into her hair under a cluster of elaborate braids discreetly. “Let the dust settle, love, and then, we’ll reevaluate our situation.”

“I am sick and tired of their expectations dictating my life!” Dís exclaimed passionately.

Throwing a quick glance down the corridor to make sure that they were indeed alone, Sami leaned forward and pressed a short but passionate kiss onto that displeased moue.

“We’ve played this game for too long not to know the rules, dear,” she then reminded Dís gently. “We cannot force them to change their mind. Don’t do it for them—do it for those you’ve almost lost and who have a right to heal and find their bearings before being ambushed with such potentially distressing news.”

“I shall tell Thorin,” Dís insisted. “I want him to know.”

“You may do that,” Sami agreed, “and I am sure the king would also recommend a path of caution and political astuteness.”

“Of course, he would,” Dís groaned. “He’s the last person who should lecture me on the obligations of wedlock. I am a widow!”

Pressing Dís’ hand tenderly, Sami pulled her down the hallway carefully. “Soon,” she promised, letting go of that hand she had held through their darkest nights as they arrived in front of the doors to the banquet hall.

Demurely, she stepped behind Dís, her head bowed and her eyes glued to the stone floor—at least on the surface, she would slip back into the role for which she had been chosen and trained.

Sami decided to do her best to keep up appearances and buy everyone more time to properly convalesce and grow accustomed to this new world they were going to build.

“Soon,” Dís repeated with much more decisiveness and fire.

The doors swung open, and the noise swelled like an ocean around them.

“Dís, my dear sister,” the king croaked, still leaning heavily on his intricately decorated cane. “And this must be your friend.”

@fellowshipofthefics here is the second entry for the Pride Bingo

As always, lots of love from me and thank you dear anon for this request!

#ask #IDNMT answers #Fotfics #june pride bingo #Anonymous #IDNMT writes #fanfiction #writing #tolkien writing #jrrt #Dís #Dís x OC #lesbian rep

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bmblboop · 6 months

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RWBY X Justice League... TWO!

Gonna do another liveblog while killing some time. Here goes!

-cut for length-

UHD is 480p? This movie has been out for two weeks and it's not 1080? I thought the first one was only that way bc I got it day-of!

Ugh, I wont get mad over it. The YT edition gave me trouble the last time too - let's just see how it goes.

Recap! Took me a minute to realize this is the Weiss vs Bruce music from the first movie - which is definitely the closest we've gotten to classic RWBY music.

"'Grimm' as in, "The Brothers"?" For half a second I thought she was referring to the Gods of Light and Dark but no as in the authors 'Brothers Grimm' because the DC universe is supposed to be Earth and fairytales are just fairytales here. Are they gonna lean more into the allusion aspect of RWBY et. al now that we have a world where Red Riding Hood and the others are just stories?

Jurassic Park moment with the Pterrorsaur. Except this time they can literally smell fear.

Epic Ruby moment vs the Taijitu (first time in Maya), love how creative the fights are.

Grimm on Earth turn to gunk? Hopefully it's just goo and not regeneration-goo (like the Wyvern 'Blood' in v3).

Ooh, when the Kilg%re/Goliath gets punched the cracks are yellow. Color scheme: red, white, black, yellow.

When I saw the flash of purple tailing Batman I thought TYRIAN!? Nope, it's just a Scorpion with a modified tail... suspiciously like Tyrian's. Guess Watts is involved after all.

Saw this preview clip, but ow. Weiss is still hurting from losing Atlas, and I honestly don't blame her. That was her home, and it's straight up gone. Glad to see this carry through from v9, as well as Ruby's post-renewal mindset.

Voice changer to keep the mystery voice a mystery.

Mmm Flash angst. Reminds me of v9 Jaune. Blond boys get no sleep.

Had to pause on Weiss' contacts screen and I love that shes got all her teammates, all her family, and Maria just, lurking. Lol

Clearly Maria has her own scroll but I do have to wonder how good she is at tech things given she has such a close-cropped image. Or maybe she doesn't give a shit XD.

Love love love that conversation with Klein, I love that this is the direction of Weiss' character arc and I love that daddy issues whammy of 'He abandoned Atlas long before it fell.' 'Do you mean Atlas, or your family?'

Time dilation double pun. The 'when you are needed most' line at the end of v9 and Weiss being the one saying 'we have experience with that' considering one of her glyphs is Time Dilation.

Blake breaking down the door feat. Yang's flirty wink.

XD Ruby entering the portal in style

We finally got a 'not in Kansas anymore' referenceeeee.

Oh, split up along Weiss/Blake and Yang/Ruby this time, glad to see it! Time for sisterly conflict.

Heh. Joker and Harley watching the city burn.

Oh now I see why Blake went to Gotham. Cat. Bat. "This is where he's from. I get it now."

The way Ruby just knew that she'd still be able to move like she did on Remnant. My girl. (Was worried for a sec she was gonna try to Silver Eyes it and that would fail)

"You learn not to question Flash's villain roster." That got a laugh out of me and I don't even know about Flash's lore.

Something about Weiss mentioning "Mr Freeze" while dressed as an Ice Princess is funny to me.

The particles on Blake and Jessica's fist bump :D

Aw man, it IS regeneration goop!

I guess 'consciousness is stored' is how we can get Watts in a post-v9 crossover. Technomagic stuff.

Weiss proving she's the queen.

Hope Cyborg isn't corrupted.

Love this Cobra/Dragonfly grimm. Clip it's wings!

'We need more firepower.' Enter Yang with an epic save.

Hold on, are Yang's flame punches the color of the lesbian flag?

Are we gonna a get a 'speedsters need to slow down' moral here? With Flash also rushing into danger and nearly getting killed?

Anyway, planning session time.

The truth revealed.

Honestly, 'no body no death' kinda applies here like we KNOW that Watts died either burning to death via Cinder's wish or when Atlas fell but he was surrounded by computers at the time as well. It could have literally been the last thing he ever did. (Or he did it during v7 since he already wormed his way into the Atlas network via Jacques).

Via Jacques. Man. Watts really is Weiss's personal villain.

The whole 'transferring consciousness' thing also reeks of the Aura Transfer machines used on the Maidens, but I always assumed that was Pietro's invention so he could give life to Penny. Maybe Watts stole or twisted the concept for his own use.

Yang seeing the Ruby in Flash mmmmm. The way he looks at her arm and asks 'what happened?' and Yang explains how she felt ooooooooo. Flash explaining that Kilgore is no longer in his brain but he hears and sees him all the time.

Blonde PTSD buddies WOOOO-

Meanwhile Ruby and Clark orphan bonding. Not entirely sure how Ruby will take the 'I make my parents proud for fighting for the things they died for'

Also given that some of Summer's first "lines" in the show was Red Like Roses Part 2 "baby please don't do what I did/I don't want you to waste your life in vain"

And on that somber note -break time!

#jl x rwby #rwby x justice league #rwby liveblog #jl x rwby part 2 spoilers

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ya-world-challenge · 4 months

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Book Review: The Conqueror's Saga by Kiersten White (🇷🇴 Romania)

[image 1: book trilogy covers: And I Darken, Now I Rise, Bright We Burn. On each cover a spear slashes through an object: a flower, a necklace, a pomegranate; image 2: map showing modern Romania; image 3: the view from Poenari castle in Romania - the walls of a stone fortress drop away to a steep mountainous landscape covered in green; source: wikimedia]

And I Darken; Now I Rise; Bright We Burn

Author: Kiersten White

YA World Challenge for 🇷🇴 Romania

I've seen some criticism of this series by Romanian reviewers, one of which is Lada's name (which I agree is odd), and others that are to be expected when you take a national hero (Vlad the Impaler), gender-flip him, and write him in love with the leader of an empire that oppressed your nation for centuries. So it's important to acknowledge this series as pure fiction. It did have me flipping through Wikipedias of the the real historical characters mentioned, many of whom I had never learned about before.

While much of the series (1 and 2 especially) take place in the Ottoman Empire (modern Turkey), the series follows the point of view of two siblings from Wallachia, a historical region of the modern state of Romania.

Review

Lada and her brother Radu are left as hostages of the Ottoman Empire as children to keep their father "loyal" as a vassal. I loved Lada's character from the beginning: strong-willed, possessive, brutal even as a child, and "ugly". The character-building was expert and the way the author weaves relationships and motivations in a complex tapestry, against a backdrop of a rich world.

And I Darken builds the siblings' relationship with the future sultan Mehmed, setting up that messy love triangle, and a scheme to get Mehmed on the throne. While Radu falls for Islam, Lada is never not wholly dedicated to Wallachia.

With Now I Rise, oh lord, the gay angst!... dear Radu. With Lada gone off to find support for her kingdom, Radu is left with his angst. We see the battle of Constantinople, and interconnected politics around Eastern Europe as Lada raises her army and searches for allies.

Bright We Burn, and Lada is ready to go full-on Impaler. The action was great, until... the entire climax and ending. I felt the finale really cheated Lada and did not serve her character. I didn't feel that book 3 lived up to its title. (And god, what a cringe epilogue!)

I have such mixed feelings about this series because it is incredibly well-written and engaging throughout, with an epic world and depth of character. But I dislike the ending the more I think about it. Without spoilers, I can just say that I think the whole feminist theme built up through the book fell apart in the end.

Books 1-2 I would have rated 4.5 stars, but Book 3 ultimately pulled the rating down.

Other reps: #muslim #gay #m/f #lesbian side characters #orthodox christian

Genres: #alternate history #drama #romance #adventure #war

★ ★ ★ 3 stars

SPOILER rant under the cut:

In Book 2, the gunpowder lady said something to Radu - that Lada would be the type to go out with fire. With a title called Bright We Burn, I fully expected to see Lada going down as brightly and destructively as a meteorite, taking herself out with everything. What a disappointment.

The ending and Lada's forced 'submission' to Radu, by him taking away every last thing she had, under the guise of *compassion*, quite rankled me. It took away all the independence of her character that the series had built up from the beginning, and replaced it with nothing.

And. The. Kid. That epilogue. No, just no. I hate that such a promising series had to end with the cisheteronormative notion that "you must bear progeny to have a legacy". Fuck that. It completely threw away everything that Lada was just to have this "oh cute she acts like her mother" moment. 🤮 That and Radu vandalizing the church floor with his weak, misogynist scratchings.

It could have been so much better.

#book review #ya world challenge #romania #and i darken #now i rise #bright we burn #historical medieval to 19th century #historical fiction #romance #drama #adventure #war #alternate history #m/f #gay #lesbian #muslim #orthodox christian

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braveblackbutterfly · 1 year

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Farewell to The Owl House: a personal essay (warning: this a long post)

When Steven Universe ended in 2020, I didn’t think I would ever find another animated show that I would grow to love dearly.

And then I found The Owl House a couple of months later.

I started seeing gifs (like this one) and posts about this cartoon on my dashboard, similarly to how I discovered Steven Universe. Eventually, I decided to check it out on Disney Now. I watched the first episode and immediately liked it. So I watched the next episode and the next til I caught up a week before the episode that rocked the world (or at least the fandom’s world).

Enchanting Grom Fright.

I have seen a few epic moments/episodes in children’s animated shows like Steven Universe and She-Ra. But there was just something about the lumity dance scene and the episode as a whole that just warmed my heart. And when Dana Terrace confirmed that Luz is bi (and later that Amity’s a lesbian), I was over the freaking moon.

Growing up, I never saw much if any (good) representation of bisexual characters in the media. I just assumed people were either gay or straight. I recognized my attraction to boys when I was a kid and immediately assumed I was straight, ignoring any signs that I liked girls too because I liked guys, so I can’t be gay, right?

Right?

It wasn’t until college and meeting one of my roommates who was bi and being introduced to her queer group of friends that I began to realize “yes, people can like men and women, or any genders for that matter.” And I finally allowed myself to ask the question: “do I like women too?” The answer was yes and I began identifying as bisexual (or queer when people act like they can’t understand bisexuality *eye roll*).

So finally seeing a show with a bi protagonist whose also a girl of color and neurodivergent just made me felt seen all these many years later. To know that kids and teens (and yes, adults too) can see a character like themselves or realized that bi people actually exist and are actually you know...people who deserves love and respect.

Luz is one of my favorite characters in the series, and I relate to her a good amount. But I relate to a few other characters too, particularly Amity.

I talked about this in another post I made last year (or was it 2021?) but going to talk about it on here too.

Lost in Language is one of my favorite season 1A episodes, for many different reasons. But mainly because of the progression of Luz and Amity’s relationship (from Amity wanting nothing to do with Luz to admitting she was harsh with her and them hitting the reset button).

I have been an Amity in the past. Not the mean/bitchy attitude Amity back then, coming from a rich or esteemed family. But I was the top student of my class too.

I had to be.

Not because of my parents like in Amity’s case. But because I had no other social standing in middle and high school. Students knew my name because of my high grades, my awards and eventually graduating as salutatorian. Yes, I’m still a tiny bit disappointed about the salutatorian thing. It was a battle between me and another girl throughout our 4 years in school, but she ended up becoming valedictorian.

In middle school, I had a Luz at my school. She kept trying to be my friend, but I wanted nothing to do with her. It always felt like whenever I was around her, something bad would happen. Especially this one incident. I was at my locker, ready to go home when she came by. She was twirling her baton, and it smacked me on my head. I got pissed and told her off. She profusely apologized, but I was too mad to accept her apology, and I left.

Looking back, I know I was too harsh with her. It was just an accident. She didn’t mean for the baton to hit my head. But at the time, I didn’t want her around. So unlike Luz and Amity, we never became friends.

I have slowly but surely grown to not care about being the best student, the best employee, the best child, the best this and that. I am an awesome person because of the person I have grown into, making changes and opening my mind and falling in and out of like/love with my friends (and more than friends). And no one can dictate the path I choose for myself.

I typed all of this to simply say: I love The Owl House.

I sometimes hate admitting it because Steven Universe still means a lot to me, but The Owl House has become my ultimate favorite cartoon of the newer generation (I’m a 90s baby and 90s/early 2000s cartoons still have my heart).

Besides relating to the characters and enjoying both the lighthearted and heartbreaking moments, this show has awakened the creativity in me.

I am a writer...or at least I love writing. But I haven’t done or shared that many projects of mine online. But in 2021, I gave drawing another chance, specifically redrawing screenshots. I liked my work and had the bravery to share my artwork on here, which I still do. I have to admit that my drawing skills have improved throughout the years. I still don’t feel ready to make art inspired by my own ideas. If I did, I would make and post a hundred black racebent Amity/canon Luz fanart.

And this year, I posted my very first fanfic. I have written fanfics before, but never ever shared them with anybody, especially not for the whole world to read. But again, this show inspired me so much that I just had to start sharing it.

Plus, my creative projects has helped me make some of the best friends I have ever made on here. And I love having their support and supporting them when they share their projects.

I’m not ready to see this amazing show come to end tonight. But I don’t think I will ever truly be ready to say goodbye. I’m going to miss this show. All the laughs, all the cries, all the shipping moments.

Thank you to the creator, the cast, the crew, and everybody who helped make this cartoon come into existence.

Us weirdos will always stick together.

#bbb butterfly #the owl house #toh #luz noceda #amity blight #lumity #bi representation #leeann art #i do not own these gifs

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etrangersvoyageant · 4 months

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2023 favorites

Tagged by @godzilla-en-mexico

Albums

It was a pretty good year for music. These are my favourites (only records released in 2023):

Croatian Armor – A Part of You in Everything

Debby Friday – Good Luck

Deena Abdelwahed – Jbal Rrsas

Fatima Al Qadiri – Gumar

Field Lines Cartographer – Phases of This and Other Moons

HAAi - DJ Kicks

Nathan Micay – To The God Named Dream

Nabihah Iqbal – Dreamer

oqbqbo – Water Tiger

RatPajama – Drunken Lost Tapes

Schacke – Synchronized Breathing

SØS Gunver Ryberg – Spine

Tzusing – 绿帽 Green Hat

zaké & friends – Live at the Gothic Chapel

VA – Kotti Island Disc – An Auditive Snapshot

Books

Disclaimer: A few years ago I took a look at my ‘read’- shelves and found them too male and too white. So hence, I like to challenge myself. As for 2023 I put these goals up: - At least 50% LGHBTQIA authors. - At least 50% female authors (I’d like it to be as high as possible, but I wasn’t planning to only read lesbians.) -Read 2666 by Roberto Bolano.

Unbeknownst to me at the start of the year, I had a lot of trouble with my own work, which limited reading in general. However, I did manage to hit all my targets. I read 21 women (63%), 17 LGHTQIA authors (51%) and dedicated a part of Summer to Bolano’s epic novel.

Looking back, my favourite books were written by the LGBTQIA authors. Audre Lorde's Sister Outsider was the definite #1, but there were also some other great efforts:

Slavenka Drakulić – How We Survived Communism and Even Laughed

Akwaeke Emezi – The Death of Vivek Oji

Shola von Rheinhold – Lote

Adrienne Rich – Arts of the Possible

Lisa Weeda – Aleksandra

Film I’m not much of a movie watcher in general, but I have m moments when I make time to watch something that seems interesting to me. Last year Nomadland (Chloé Zhao), Anatomy of Time (Jakrawal Nilthamrong) and Atlantique (Mati Diop) stayed with me.

I'd like to tag some people, but we're already a week in the new year, so I can imagine if you're not interested. That being said, if you do make one, please tag me.

#2023 #personal

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tabbycatplushy · 6 months

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Big Questions: Chapter Two

Featuring: Joule, Mocha, Paprika, Natalia, Lizzie

6.1k words. Full story: 18k words

Joule has just moved to the city, and now she finds herself living with two friendly, pretty, gay, attractive... roommates. When she suddenly shrinks down to five inches tall, will she be able to deal with the consequences while navigating her budding poly relationship?

[disability, shrinking, lesbian romance, anxiety, polyamory, furries]

>> PROLOGUE >> CHAPTER ONE >> CHAPTER TWO (YOU ARE HERE) >> CHAPTER THREE

“So here it is! The kitchen’s right here, on the other side are the dining room and the living room.”

Joule didn’t know what she had expected, even after finding out that the apartment was in such a nice building. It wasn’t a high-rise apartment with more square footage than her parents’ house.

“Wow,” was all she could say. I still don’t know how I could possibly afford to live here…

“What did you two say you do for work again?”

“I’m a receptionist,” said Mocha.

“On my taxes it says I’m a writer,” said Paprika. “But I think of myself more as an unemployable layabout.”

Forget about me, how can they afford to live here?

Joule entered the dining room, passing by a glass-doored cabinet full of an array of hand-painted plates. The western wall was dominated by a huge window overlooking the city. She could only imagine the view during sunset.

To the right of the window, a doorway led to the living room, which was open to the apartment’s central hall. A long, L-shaped couch covered the lower part of two walls, enclosing a coffee table and facing a TV on the far wall.

“Hey, come take a look,” said Mocha. She led Joule to the entertainment center beneath the TV, opening the cabinet doors to reveal several game consoles, and entire shelves devoted to disc cases. “My collection. Yours now, too!”

“No way…” Joule crouched to finger through the shelves. “You have Ringworld 2, 3 and Ringworld: Grasp? I grew up on those games!”

“Me too! My father let me play with him as a kitten.”

“Wait, kitten? Are you mixed, then?”

Mocha nodded, flicking her fluffy tail behind her for emphasis. “My mother was a cow, but my father’s a cat.”

“Ah, good to know!”

Paprika took a moment to nuzzle her girlfriend’s neck, and said “But yeah. Mocha’s pretty much my epic gamer wife. Even if we’re not married.”

“Now come over this way,” said Mocha. “Time to show you your room!”

Joule’s ‘room’ turned out to be an entire suite, complete with a queen bed, full-sized bathroom and walk-in closet.

“So, what do you think?”

“I… guys, this is really nice. Too nice! You still haven’t explained how any of this could work.”

Paprika fell backwards onto the bed, spreading out her limbs as far as they could stretch—which, admittedly, was not far for the short tabby.

Mocha sat at the foot of the bed, crossing her long legs. “Well, the long and short of it is that money is not an issue. You won’t have to pay us anything to live here. I own this apartment, so there’s no rent.”

Joule’s eyes went buggy. “You own it? As in, bought and paid for? But you’re a receptionist!”

“I came into some money a few years ago. Apparently my mother was the distant relation of some fabulously wealthy family with no direct descendants.”

“You’re joking. You’re reciting the plot of a TV romcom.”

“It’s the real deal,” Paprika said. “How else could we afford to live here? Like you said, receptionists aren’t exactly top-earners.”

“And you’re just going to invite me here to live with you? After one meeting? In the fanciest apartment ever?”

Mocha stood up, and placed her paws on Joule’s shoulders. “Yes, we are. As I said, Joule, we like you.”

“Plus, we’ve been chatting with you for months, so we know you pretty well.”

“Not that well!” Joule was flabbergasted. This can’t be real. Things like this just don’t happen!

“I understand if it’s a lot to take in all at once,” Mocha said. “Do you need some time to think about it?”

Joule looked deep into those (lovely) golden eyes, and found her answer. She didn’t have to think too hard. If there’s a hidden catch, so what. I want this. I like you guys, too.

“Yes. Yes, I want to live with you!” Joule hugged the cowgirl tightly, her triangular ear laying over the cowgirl’s chest, and Joule could hear her rapid heartbeat. She reached around with one arm, drawing Paprika into the hug as well.

“Thank you, thank you so much. I promise I’ll be a good roommate!”

***

Joule didn’t remember falling asleep, and she barely remembered waking up. Gray sunlight had streamed through the windows onto her face, where it peaked out from the fine pink skirt Mocha had given her. When she trekked across the bed, over the nightstand, and clambered onto the window sill, she discovered she no longer had the strength to turn the blinds closed. There was no possibility of sleep after that.

It’s okay, she thought, when her inability to perform a basic task threatened to bring her to tears yet again. It’s okay. Lizzie is coming. Lizzie will know what to do. I’ll be big again. I’ll go to work just like normal, and come back to my home where I can open doors and close windows.

Next she set about the task of finding something to wear—tiny or not, she didn’t feel comfortable going about naked in front of her roommates… not yet, anyway. She settled on a tissue, folded up and tied around her back with a scrunchie. It wasn’t pretty, or comfortable, but it covered what needed covering.

At seven, Joule heard commotion in the apartment beyond and knew that Lizzie had arrived. She couldn’t make out words, but she heard Paprika’s voice, then Mocha’s and an oddly-high voice that was unfamiliar to her. This was unsurprising, seeing as Lizzie wore a new form every time Joule had seen hir. She had seen the alchemist as all manner of demihumans, mythical creatures, genders, shapes and sizes; what the alchemist’s true form was, if ze even had one, none could say.

A knock from the bedroom door, before Lizzie let hirself in.

Where are ze? thought Joule.

She got her answer when a tuft of silver-and-purple hair came into view, attached to a goblin whose head didn’t even reach the top of the bed. Ze were carrying a step stool, which ze plopped onto the carpet beside Joule’s spot and climbed up. Joule could see the alchemist’s sharp teeth, hir face now inches from the tiny cat.

“Good morning, little kitten,” ze whispered with hir usual sly grin. As always, hir voice had an affect of faint amusement, making hir sound playful.

Joule blushed at the diminutive. From another mouth, she might’ve thought it was a joke at her expense, but Lizzie had called her that for years now.

“H-hi, Lizzie. Thank you for coming.”

“Of course, of course, anything for a regular like you.” Ze wrinkled hir green button nose. “Well, not anything. I don’t typically make house calls, as a rule, but this is an unusual case.”

“We could leave if you need to do a physical,” said Paprika. Joule had not seen her roommates enter.

The goblin guffawed. “Physical? I’m an alchemist, not a doctor. No, I can see the problem just fine.”

“Please say you can fix me, Liz.”

“Hmm, well. Let’s see.”

The alchemist asked Joule a series of questions that felt typical of an annual checkup. No, nothing like this had ever happened before. No, she had ot taken any uncertified potions. No, she had not eaten any unusual or suspicious foods lately. Nor had she any reason to suspect a witch, warlock, sorcerer or other vengeful magician had placed a spell on her. Yes, she had been taking her regular potions as directed.

“Hmm. And what has your emotional state been like?”

“Emotional state? Well, I guess I’ve been sort of tired after work lately.” I’ve been exhausted and in pain. “Usually it gets better when I get home, though.” My roommates are amazing and help me more than they know. “But Liz, my aura’s electric. It’s got nothing to do with shrinking.”

“Hmm. Maybe not, but it’s not unusual for a demihuman to have two, or even three magic potentials. And they’re almost always tied to emotion.”

Mocha spoke up. “Joule, you did seem pretty exhausted when you got home last night. More than tired, you were delirious, even.”

Joule watched her thumbs as she began fiddling with them. “I guess… work has been taking a lot out of me lately.”

Lizzie seemed unsurprised. “Now, kitten, this may sound like a nonsense question, but—” Ze pushed up their glasses, which were clearly too big for hir little face. “Have you tried to grow back to normal?”

Joule blinked; she had not. That’s ridiculous. As if it would be that easy. She felt a surge of annoyance, static energy puffing up her arm fur.

She took a deep breath, pushing the feeling away. Lizzie knows what ze’re doing. Ze wouldn’t make jokes about this.

“No, I haven’t. Should I?”

A nod. “Absolutely. If the source of this magic is within you, your own willpower will have an effect on it.”

“Like with an aura?” Paprika asked.

“Exactly like an aura. Kitten, what do you do to regain control of your aura?”

“I have a few things… grounding techniques my dad taught me.” Her father had the same aura.

“Good. Try to ground yourself. Imagine your normal proportion. Will yourself larger.”

Joule closed her eyes. She imagined herself as she normally was.

Me, Joule. Catgirl, five-foot-seven-inches tall, a little lanky. Stormy gray coat, orange undercoat. Dark stripes. Pink nose. Pink pawpads.

She continued listing facts about herself, focusing on size. *Five-foot-seven. B-cup. Women’s thirteen. Small shirt size. Medium if it’s a long sleeve.*

The repetition, combined with her steady breathing, had an immense calming effect. She could feel the boundaries of her form; a rolling energy that danced across her, describing every surface. And, she could have sworn, she felt it grow.

When some time had passed, she opened her eyes. Lizzie watched curiously, the same sharp-toothed smile on hir green lips. Mocha and Paprika were clasping paws with hopeful smiles.

“What? Did it work?” Joule didn’t feel much bigger.

“For a second there, you were like a foot tall! Then you shrank back down a bit,” said Paprika.

Lizzie nodded, confirming what the tabby had said. “Stand up, kitten.”

She did, and blushed. Her folded-tissue dress was breezier than what she usually wore.

“Am I at least a little bigger?”

“Yeah, I think.”

“Possibly.”

“Mm. We probably should have measured her first,” said Mocha.

“Uhm… Paprika?” said Joule.

The hopeful look on the tabby’s face disappeared, and something carefully neutral took its place. “Yeah, Joule?”

Does she feel guilty about last night? Joule thought. She suddenly felt ashamed at making Paprika feel bad. But… looking at Paprika’s hand now, she still felt a tinge of that same panic in the back of her mind.

She tried to will it away. “I was about the length of your paw last night. Could you please…”

“Ah, yeah.”

Paprika shuffled around the goblin on hir stool, and placed her paw upright next to Joule. The tiny cat managed to keep her balance as the large paw jostled the surface of the bed.

“Sorry!” said the orange giant.

Still holding steady, Joule said, “it’s okay,” and stood up carefully to her full height.

The palm transitioned to wrist at about Joule’s chin-level. Does that mean I’m bigger?

“Hmm. Inconclusive, but still, promising.”

“I think you’re definitely bigger than last night,” said Paprika. “Do you feel bigger?”

“I feel… the same, I guess. Maybe?”

She plopped to her knees, unable to hide her disappointment.

“Don’t feel discouraged, little kitten.”

“Can’t I just take a potion to get back to normal?”

The goblin shook hir head. “Not a possibility. I have theories, but we still don’t know what caused this. Potions at this juncture could only make a further mess of things.”

Joule hung her head.

A long, green finger reached under her chin. With impossible gentleness, it lifted her face to look directly into the goblin’s eyes.

“There are no easy fixes for these things. Sometimes there is no fix at all—I do not believe you are one of those cases.”

Ze stepped down from the stool, and suddenly Joule was looking down at the alchemist. “Keep trying, little kitten. And let me know if anything changes.”

***

Once Lizzie was out the door, Paprika turned towards her girlfriend/. “This is good news, right?”

“I think so,” said Mocha, “though I think Joule will have a hard time seeing it that way.”

I can imagine. “I really do think she’s bigger now. She can do it.”

Mocha smiled. “You’re right. I hope your optimism rubs off on her.”

Paprika couldn’t help herself. “If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s rubbing off.”

Mocha just rolled her eyes, But Paprika could tell she was laughing inside.

Paprika entered the dining room, with Mocha a short step behind. The table was still set from last night; after they took the unconscious Joule to her room, both of them had been too anxious to eat. Afterward, all they had time to do was save the fish, and the beautiful dishes were left out.

Paprika began gathering up the plates, talking as she worked. “Was work pissed that you called out again?”

“No, luckily it was Derek who picked up. You remember Derek? You met him at the company picnic.”

Images of a dozen half-remembered coworkers flashed through Paprika’s mind. “Sort of. Human guy, makes googly-eyes at you when you’re not looking?”

“That’s him. He always lets me do what I want.”

“Thank god for simps.”

Plates gathered, Paprika moved to the kitchen sink.

“You remember how to clean those, don’t you?” said Mocha.

“Yep. Water at half-pressure, hand-wash with the good soap.”

Mocha nodded, and Paprika set the water running. She grabbed the first plate, studying its design. A dancing lady, hot-as-fuck, but in a dorky way because she didn’t know it. “This one really is perfect for Joule. Good pick.” She began scrubbing.

“Speaking of,” said Mocha, “what’s the word on Natalia?”

Natalia was the exact opposite of Joule. She knew exactly how hot-as-fuck she was, and she enjoyed using it to her advantage.

Mocha… Mocha was different. Not because she wasn’t hot-as-fuck, because she was. But Mocha had this way of making everyone else feel like they were hot-as-fuck. Paprika hadn’t met anyone else quite like her.

Paprika cleared her throat. “Nat’s been held up with work, but she’s on her way.”

“Good. If anyone can help Joule right now, it’s her.”

Paprika nodded, remembering the meeting with Liz. She was still scared, when she measured against my paw. She shook her head, refusing to have another freak-out. I can’t help her get over her fear, but I can help her by getting over mine.

She saw that Mocha was smirking. “What’s up, Mo?”

“Oh, I was just thinking. She’s… very cute. Joule, that is.”

Paprika knew exactly what she meant.

“...I mean. I didn’t think it would be a good time to say it, but… oh my god, she’s so cute.”

Mocha just nodded and giggled, one paw covering her mouth. She was almost whispering when she said, “she’s adorable!”

“Right?” Paprika agreed. “She was cute before she was half-a-foot tall. But now! Goddamn. I just want to hold her and tell her everything will be alright.”

“And her voice!”

“Agh, her voice. It breaks my heart.”

Mocha nodded, and neither of them said anything. For a moment, the only sound was the sink as Paprika washed the dishes.

“If,” Paprika eventually said. “If, for whatever reason, she can’t get bigger again… what will we do?”

“Well, I suppose that would be up to her. She has a good relationship with her parents, right? Maybe she’ll move back with them while she figures things out.”

Paprika really, really didn’t want that to happen.

“Of course she would be welcome to stay here,” said Mocha. “If she wanted.”

“If she wanted,” echoed Paprika.

“I, for one, hope she stays here for a long time.”

Paprika put down the plate she was washing, and shut off the water.

“Me too,” she said, and turned to hug Mocha. Within seconds she had wet Mocha’s shirt with her tears.

***

“Bullshit! Fuck! Goddamnit!”

Joule kicked at the tatters of her makeshift dress, which she had thrown to the floor (the floor, in this case, being the bed).

She had been trying for almost an hour to ground herself, to almost no avail.

She hadn’t grown back to her normal size, not even close. But she had grown… by a meager two inches. Only five feet to go, she thought with a sneer.

Each time she tried, she came so tantalizingly close. She felt herself growing, almost reaching her normal size. So close! So close!

Three times she had nearly reached her full height again. And three times, as she opened her eyes, the pain returned. Her grounding fell away, her vision blurred, and she began to fall. And when she opened her eyes again, she was once again tiny, with only fractions of an inch to show for it.

She screamed more obscenities, not caring if her roommates heard. She knew they didn’t. At this point, I’ll be small forever. She fell onto her back, facing the ceiling. What do I tell my boss? My parents? What will people think of me?

It was too much. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream. She wanted to go to sleep and forget it all. A small part of her wanted to just accept it, let herself be small: wasn’t that what her body was telling her to do?

Fuck that, she thought. Fuck that!

She sat up, and looked at the alarm on her nightstand. Eight o’clock; if she left in the next thirty minutes, she could still make it to work.

One more shot. I can do it, I can hold it this time. I’ll prove it. I’ll show my body how it’s supposed to be.

She sat down one more time for her grounding. Breathing deeply, she began her mantra.

Joule. Catgirl. Five-foot-seven-inches tall, a little lanky. Twenty-two years old. Five-foot-seven. Stormy gray coat, orange undercoat. Size medium. Dark striped. Five-foot-seven. Women’s thirteen.

Like before, her body began to grow. She could feel the boundaries of her tiny form expanding, taking up more space. A pleasant, almost ticklish sensation danced across her skin. Her crossed legs began to cover more and more of the bed.

She pushed harder, straining against her physical limits. Bigger, and bigger still, she felt herself grow. I’m so close! Just a bit more!

Her control was slipping; she could feel her form receding. No, no! I’ve got to be normal again!

She gave up on trying to reach her full height, and instead focused on maintaining her current size. Beads of sweat dampened her brow. With a deep breath, she opened her eyes.

She was normal. I’m normal! Giddy laughter erupted from within her as she looked around the room. After an indulgent moment, though, she reigned back her energy. Any slip-up might break my concentration, and send me back down to bite-sized.

Still, she allowed herself some satisfaction; she had done it!

Well, almost.

Joule could tell she was a bit shorter than usual. But she was a damn sight larger than she had been a few minutes ago. I think I’m right about Paprika’s height, she mused. Not quite normal, but I can make this work.

Now for the real test: could she hold it? She could feel the precariousness of her current state. Every cell of her body felt out of place; if given the chance, it would try to shrink in on itself. The only thing preventing it was her own concentration. To stay normal, all I have to do is concentrate. I can do that. I can function like a normal person.

Carefully, Joule slid one leg out and cautiously lowered it over the edge of the bed. Her paw touched the floor, and she wiggled her toes against the carpet. She swung the other leg over, then slowly raised herself upright.

I’m standing! I’m doing it! Now, I need to get ready… she looked at the door leading to her bathroom; it looked almost impossibly far. Okay, one step at a time.

She took slow, measured steps as she moved from the bed to the bathroom. She hissed as her paws first touched the cold tiles, almost letting go of the iron grip she held on her form; but she calmed herself, just barely.

More steps across the bathroom floor. The pain in her legs was coming back. It’s okay, I can deal with that. I deal with that all the time.

After some time, she arrived at the sink. She picked up the toothpaste and squeezed, gently, a dab of paste onto her brush. Paw shaking, she brushed her teeth.

I can do this. I can do this. She repeated the mantra.

She spat out into the sink. Okay, now to take…

Turning to the shower, she thought about climbing in, turning on the water. Her heart sank. I can’t do this, she realized. I can’t I can’t I can’t I…

She could feel her form slipping, whole inches evaporating off of her like nothing. No! Get a hold of yourself!

Breathing. Mantra.

After a minute, she got a hold of herself—but she’d lost at least three inches in the process.

Not for the first time, Joule thought about calling her roommates for help. She knew they would do so in a heartbeat; that’s just how they were. The thought tempted her, more than she expected. But it filled her with shame. Something inside her strongly felt that to ask for help now would be a failure. That she’d be letting down not only Mocha and Paprika, but herself as well.

I have to do this on my own. It’s the only option.

Feigning more conviction than she actually held, she turned back toward the room. Okay, no problem. I’ll just skip my shower today. No problem. Time to get dressed, and then I can go.

Now wanting to push her luck by trying to open the closet, she headed for her desk, where the uniform she had shrunken out of last night lay in a neatly folded pile. She tried very hard not to think about how her roommates had seen her naked and carried her to the bed.

Joule felt some height slip away when she pulled on her bra and realized she couldn’t get it to stay on—her bust was just too thin now. She made a pained noise; everything seemed to be telling her she couldn't do this. Well fuck that. I can do this. I’m normal!

She tossed the bra away and pulled on her other clothes, one limb at a time, leaning on her desk when she needed to. Everything was baggy, but it stayed on.

Now came the hard part.

Joule approached the bedroom door. Breath held, she turned the knob, careful not to make a sound. Once it was opened wide enough to pass through, she tiptoed out.

The apartment was laid out so that every room was attached to a central hall. On one side were the dining room, living room, and Mocha’s streaming room; on the other were the kitchen, guest bedroom, guest bathroom, study, and Joule’s room; between the two, at the end of the hall was the master bedroom.

She crossed her fingers that Mocha and Paprika wouldn’t catch her, and took one timid step into the hall. The sound of running water; other than that, the coast was clear.

Treading lightly on her paws, keeping against the wall, she continued down the hall. Gradually, she began to hear her roommates’ voices drifting from the kitchen.

“...Joule, that is.”

She stopped. Unable to help herself, she listened around the corner as Paprika said, “...I mean. I didn’t think it would be a good time to say it, but… oh my god, she’s so cute.”

Mocha’s giggling, and some words that she couldn’t make out.

Then Paprika almost shouted, “Right? She was cute before she was half-a-foot tall. But now! Goddamn. I just want to hold her and tell her everything will be alright.”

“And her voice!”

“Agh, her voice. It breaks my heart.”

Joule couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She wanted to be mad, but… they think… I’m cute?

The floaty feeling took hold of her core. Her form began slipping. Immediately, she shoved all those feelings down, out of sight, locking them away. She’d lost another inch in just that split second.

No. No time for that. Got to go right now.

She slid forward, crouching out of sight. The kitchen island provided the perfect cover. Mocha and Paprika said other things, but Joule wasn’t listening. She got to the front door, still crouched, and slowly opened it as quietly as she could. A minute later she was sliding it closed, her roommates none the wiser.

Get to work, prove them wrong, get to work, prove them wrong, get to work… was her new mantra as she hurried down the hall, her pant legs dragging on her heels.

She arrived at the elevator doors, impatiently reaching up to tap the button. Luckily it was already on this floor. The metal doors slid open. She stepped inside and…

And looked up at the button panel.

There was no way she could go to work like this. She felt like crying. She felt like breaking things. Something vital, whatever modicum of control she was holding onto, fizzled out in her mind, and she fell to the ground, a tiny creature buried in a crumpled work uniform.

The elevator doors slid closed.

***

Joule was exhausted, too tired to even cry. Instead she lay curled up in her pile of clothes, in the corner of the elevator.

She had tried to ground herself and grow again, but she just couldn’t. No matter how hard she concentrated, her technique wouldn’t work. She couldn’t focus, she couldn’t get bigger, she couldn’t reach the elevator buttons. She was trapped.

So for the last half hour, she simply lay there, forgotten and trying to forget. The elevator had been used by others at least twice, and each time Joule could only freeze and hope she didn’t get stepped on. So far, no one had bothered with her pile of clothes.

Joule tensed as she heard the elevator doors open once more, bracing for another giant to stroll into her tiny world. Instead of footsteps, though, there was some kind of metallic scuttling noise, like the clacking of nails on metal.

Joule pawed through the humongous clothing, and found a gap where she could peer out into the big world of the elevator beyond.

The source of the noise was a mobile chair—a device much like a wheelchair, but using mechanical legs like an insect rather than wheels—a tiny one, helmed by a tiny woman.

Though embarrassed to admit it, the first thing Joule noticed was the woman’s massive chest, bound in a tight sweater with a triangular window that exposed her cleavage. The second thing Joule noticed was that the woman’s large, red eyes perfectly matched the red antennae parting her straight black bangs. From the waist down, her tanned skin gave way to a segmented shrimp tail, curled up beneath her in the mobile chair’s padded seat.

Joule couldn’t help but be a bit intimidated by the shrimpgirl. She was beautiful in a picture-perfect way, and dressed as fashionably as if she had just skittered off a runway. And there was something familiar about her…

Joule’s claws made a tiny tapping sound as she brushed too close to a zipper. The shrimp’s antennae twitched, and her head swiveled towards Joule’s location in the pile of clothes. The tiny cat quickly pulled back out of sight, instinct taking over.

Surrounded by the dark fabric, she heard the muffled scuttling of the mobile chair getting closer. Then the shrimpgirl spoke, her voice as beautiful as her appearance.

“Uhm, like, Joule?”

Joule’s ears perked.

“Yes..?” she replied from deep in her clothing burrow.

“Oh!” The shrimp seemed surprised to get an answer. “Uhm, my name’s Nat, maybe you’ve heard of me. Paprika’s my girlfriend?”

This is Nat? Paprika’s mentioned her a few times, but I didn’t know she was…

“Are you like, okay in there?"

“Yes! I’m fine, please don’t come closer.”

“Do you need some clothes?”

Joule poked her head out. “Do you… have any?”

Nat reached around to pull up a pack that hung off the back of the chair. “Pap asked me to bring you some things.” She pulled out a bundle of tiny clothes, and tossed them to Joule.

“Wait, how did anyone know I was here?”

“Well, like, I didn’t. I was on my way up to your apartment. Then I saw the pile of clothes and made an educated guess.”

“That makes sense, I suppose. Did you say Paprika asked you to get me clothes?”

“And other things. She was pretty worried—apparently you’ve been going through some shit.”

Joule absentmindedly nodded as she picked through the clothes pile. There were tops and pants and underwear in a few different styles, all sized for a tiny person like her.

“I hope those match you. Pap gave me some rough measurements, but like, I don’t really know your style. She did mention your unique coat. And your eyes… a lot.” She gave Joule a knowing grin.

“O-oh, sorry,” said Joule, unsure what to say to that as she examined the clothes. She held up a loose tank top and some bright teal yoga pants. “These are… perfect, actually.”

“Great!” Joule could almost hear the shrimp’s relief. “And don’t be. I wouldn’t be dating Pap, of all people, if I wasn’t okay with sharing.”

Joule sat up, quick as a switch, her cheeks red as Nat’s eyes. “I don’t—it’s not…” she trailed off, unable to finish such an obvious lie.

Remembering she was naked, she covered up her exposed chest with her arms before slipping back inside the burrow of giant clothes. Natalia just giggled.

A minute later she emerged, fully dressed.

“You look good! Glad to see Pap’s… detailed descriptions were accurate. I was like, worried the clothes wouldn’t match right.”

Indeed, the outfit matched Joule’s natural coloration perfectly.

“You did a great job,” Joule agreed. Then she awkwardly added, “on yourself, too.”

“Thank you. I do have an image to maintain.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, not to brag or anything but a lot of people consider me something of a fashion icon. One of my many side gigs.”

“Wait, are you..?”

“I am! What did you recognize me from? Swimsuit, microfashion, brand deals, insta?”

Joule shook her head. “I’m not on social media much. You’re the spokesperson for MicroSec.” It was a tech startup that was designing miniature phones and computers.

Nat’s red eyes flashed, a sly smile crossing her face. “I’m impressed. That’s one of my more niche projects. And one of my favorites.” The shrimp pulled a perfectly shrimp-sized smartphone out of her cleavage. “But like, that can wait. Let’s get back to the apartment.”

“How? We can’t reach the buttons. And I couldn’t even climb the stairs when I was normal-sized.”

“Normal is relative, honey. And no, we can’t reach those buttons,” she gestured towards the panel, an impossible distance above. “But we don’t need to.”

She scuttled over to the wall below the panel. Joule had to jog to keep up. She stopped right where the wall met the floor. About two inches from the bottom was a metal square nearly flush with the surrounding wall, roughly one inch to a side.

She jerked her head toward the square. “Push it in, then let go.”

Joule did as she was told. When she pushed the square in, there was a click, and the metal square swung open. Behind it was a panel of buttons just like the one above, except much smaller.

“Wow, I’ve never seen this before. Are they new?”

Nat shook her head. “Micro-sized panels have always been around, but they had a reputation for always being broken. Big people on the elevator would kick ‘em, or step on ‘em, or whatever, and then no one would bother to fix it. A couple years ago the city started requiring these push-open covers, so they’re more protected now.” She put her hands on her hips. “I may have had a hand in that legislation.”

“You work in law, too?”

“Mm hmm. I work at a firm focusing on demihuman law, and I head up the microhuman division. Lawyer is my actual job, all the other shit is just side projects.”

“That’s seriously impressive!”

The shrimp just shrugged. “Very sweet of you to say. Now like, push the button already.”

Joule punched in her floor, and leaned back against the wall. “How did I never notice these until now?”

Nat shrugged again, though it was clear she knew why. “You never needed to. Until you did.”

That gave Joule pause. What other things made for microhumans have I never bothered to notice?

All at once, Joule remembered all her thoughts of ‘fairness’ and ‘being normal’ over the last day. A knot of shame tightened in her chest as her previous words resurfaced. ‘I’m not a fucking shrimp!’

Joule looked at Natalia, who happened to be stretching her arms in a way that made her chest just out even more than usual. The shrimpgirl caught her staring, and winked.

Well, she is, thought Joule, and she’s fucking awesome.

***

The elevator announced their arrival, and the doors whooshed open. Joule followed Nat into the hall, trying to think of what to say.

“So, what’s your aura?”

“It’s a secret,” she answered with a mischievous grin. “What’s yours?”

“It’s… a secret.”

Nat giggled as she dialed a number on her phone. “How mysterious…”

The ringer connected.

“Hey babe, it’s Nat. Listen, I’m right outside, and I’ve got a little someone with me.”

The voice on the other line suddenly got loud and frantic.

“She’s okay! Just a little shaken.” Nat glanced at Joule smiling warmly. “Mm hmm. We’re standing at the door.”

She hung up.

“By the way, you’ll want a pair of these.” She handed Joule two small bits of plastic that looked a bit like hearing aids. “Helps the giants not hurt your ears all the time.”

Joule thanked her, and put them in just as the door swung open to reveal Mocha and Paprika. The two huge girls dropped to their knees, shaking the ground.

“Joule!” they shouted, making the tiny catgirl very grateful for the devices in her ears.

“We looked everywhere for you!” Paprika said. Her voice was congested, and her eyes were red-rimmed.

“What happened? Where did you go?” asked Mocha. “We thought you were lost somewhere, or stuck!”

Joule had never seen either of them this upset. Mocha’s calm demeanor had always seemed unbreakable. For what felt like the thousandth time since last night, Joule felt tears come unbidden to her eyes. “I’m sorry,” Joule said, “I did something really, really… I thought I could…” she couldn’t continue.

“Please,” said Mocha, “please don’t scare us like that. We were so worried.”

“If you want to go out, please just tell us,” said Paprika.

Joule nodded. “I will. I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

Paprika moved her hand, then stopped herself. “Are you… it’s okay if you’d rather not, but… can we..?”

Right now, Joule decided she could really use some comfort. And, she remembered, I trust them. I’ve got to remember that.

She nodded again. “Let’s start small, though. Stick out your pointer fingers.”

They did. Joule reached out to each one, pulling them together so they were right against each other, and hugged both of them at once.

Once the hug was over, Paprika turned to Nat for a long-overdue greeting. She picked up the giddy shrimpgirl in both hands, bringing her in for a smooch that covered half her face. “Hi, darling,” Paprika said.

Nat hugged her cheeks, her antennae tickling the tabby’s brow. “Hey babe!”

Paprika lowered her back into her chair. “And you,” she said, turning to glare at Joule. “I’m going to make you a hot cocoa, wrap you up in a blanket, and then you’re going to call your work to say you’re not coming in.”

“I, uh, yes sir!”

Paprika gave a stern nod, and made for the kitchen. “Anyone else want a hot drink?”

>> NEXT CHAPTER

#writeblr #g/t fluff #furry #disability #sizetumblr #fursona #joule #mocha #paprika #natalia #tiny #poly #gay #lit #my lit #trans

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thelastbraincellofthehive · 1 year

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And we're back for V4! Honestly, I'm making it through more than I thought I would. I was sure I was gonna bail after 2 lol.

Anyways, the new engine was really a breath of fresh air for this volume, and it's impressive how much animation is still getting better every volume<3 RWBY makes me proud in a way no other show or just thing has ever done. I just wish it wouldn't hurt so bad lol.

Anyways, time for random thoughts!

I gotta go ahead and say that V4-6 is my favorite outfit for Blake. The pirate vibes on her are *chef kiss* and I'm just in love with her white coat RIP the coat, another good thing Adam ruined *sighs*

God, the yearning separated bees are so angsty <3 I love it, the payoff will be so great.

God, Sun was so annoying this volume, poor boy has a good heart but definitely is too eager for Blake to match him and things get aaaaaawkward lol I'm happy the managed to get into an understanding by next volume tho, Blake needed him, I can see that now.

It's so interesting to hear all the bits of story we get to learn each volume and how eventually it all falls apart with Jinn's story in v6. I don't blame Qrow for how hard he took it, poor man has been through a lot, and he really believed in Ozpin through it all.

I loooove the tale of the two brother's animation style<3 it's one of my favorite parts of the season.

The ship captain is another favorite part lol I don't know, I just think he's neat. Wouldn't be opposed yo seeing more of him.

Ilia <3 Love of my life, best lesbian Chameleon girl <3 good how I miss you!

Again, when is Ilia coming back so she can finally meet and fall in love with Weiss?? RT is homofobic to keep these two apart! /Jk

But seriously they are fuckin' perfect for eachother I won't get tired of saying it. Schnee x Faunus? Both sides of the Atlas/Mantle coin? Rainbow x white? Trying to live their families legacy without letting it consume them? What's not to like?

Ahem, anyways. The Kuroyuri arc had me biting my freaking nails. Seriously after v3 I was so sure someone was going to die!

Remember that couple days we were all terrified of the nuckelavee and then someone compared it to the wacky waving inflatable arm flailing tubeman and since then we just laugh about him? Lol this Is why I love this fandom.

Maya Zwei <3

I can't imagine how horrible it was for the girls all that time we didn't get to see in between volumes. Weiss being completely alone in Atlas, with no way to know if Yang and Ruby had gotten better, just knowing that Blake had ran into the night. Blake wondering everyday if Yang was thinking about her, so sure that she was hated, heating herself too much to ask for help or just company... Ruby missing the friends she had come to trust so wholeheartedly and seeing her big sister broken and depressed and not knowing what to do because Yang had never been nothing but bright and strong and perfect. Yang looking at books and thinking of Blake and wanting to hate her because it would be so much easier. And that's not even counting all of them mourning Pyrrha and Penny and everything they lost in the blink of an eye.

On that note, Ruby's outfit for this arc paying homage to both Penny and Pyrrha still hurts me so much</3 this is also probably my favorite outfit of her, thought her Atlas outfit is quite good too.

The moment we learn that Blake is practically a Princess lol I love it, I love seeing reactors get to that part.

But honestly my favorite part to see reactors will always be Taiyang's 'lost a couple braincells along with that arm' joke lol honestly I hate that joke, but the sheet shock on everyone's faces is just epic lol.

Honestly I feel I've slept on Yang's v4 outfit btw. Yeah, her final/v5-6 outfit is extremely badass and I love it, but the sweats + orange tanktop looks so good on her??? Honestly this was the first volume I looked at Yang and was atracted to her lol.

So yeah Yang please join the line of women who could step on me and I'd thank them.

Also: *puts Ilia there too*

Specially once she paints her arm yellow <3 I stan by my previous statement that Yang looks so much better with her new arm. It feels like her design is finally complete.

V4 villains really, really make me miss v1-3 villains lol. I'm sorry, but I just think Hazel and Watts are unninteresting (aside from the Emm-Hazel plot but I only like it because Emmerald) and while I find Tyrian kinda funny because he's an obvious theater kid lol it was not enough to put team WTCH in my good graces after getting rid of my two faves from team CRMNE lol. Also, Cinder being too hurt to cause chaos was a negative</3 I loved sassy overconfident world destroyer Cinder.

It is also extremely painful for me to watch Cinder slowly dig her own grave after seeing her backstory. I always had a soft spot for Cinder and that really made it worse.

Baby Nora and Ren<3 good they were cute! And god did the timeskip did them good lol this is also my favorite Nora outfit <3 she looks amazing.

That moment in Kuroyuri when baby Ren gives Nora the hammer while boop play in the background? I tear up every fucking time. It's literally imposible not to love them together, just as It was literally imposible for Nora to not fall for him <3 my babies

Qrow being bandaged over his clothes while injures will never not be funny to me lol oh, the joys of working with 3D models!

Weiss learning to summon <3 also just... Weiss <3 She's the best. This volume wasn't kind on her, but she rose to the challenge and got so far!!

Also, can I just say that I feel Whitley... Is what people thinks Draco Malfoy Is? Like... I always remembered Draco while watching Whitley, but Whitley is an actually cool character as you get to know him, while Draco just... disapointed me. He's also my baby and I demand him to be protected.

Seeing Raven oficially was one of my favorite parts of the volume <3 She's a bitch, she's the worst, I love her so much!!!!

Again with the controversial and refuted headcanon... Qrow getting a song that includes the line 'you don't want the burden of my name', talking to Ruby about how his semblance makes things hard on family... That delirious 'Tai, she's not coming back' while poisoned... Seriously it would've made so much sence if Ruby was his daughter lol. At this point it's just hilarious.

The Jaune - Ruby moment in Kuroyuri </3 seriously give these poor kids therapy, they need it.

This Is the only volume where I actually have a score saved on my Spotify playlist: the first part of The next step where you can hear the music box version of Divide. I would pay for a full of that song <3 I adore creepy music box covers.

The way Blake's voice breaks when she finally says Yang's name? I'm ok, I swear! I'm not.

If you didn't cry during Ruby's letter scene... You're lying!! It's not possible to not cry! Specially with Home in the background. Home is another special song to me, it was one of the first ones I memorised back when my english wasn't great <3

That part when Ruby talks about people who are still lost and people who wants to take advantage of them and it shows Ilia with the Albains? I loved it, that's why I never doubted of my girl<3

And so it became the long journey to have Winter back... I remember how annoyed I was during all of v4-5 that we never got to see her outside of the Weiss trailer lol you don't just introduce a character like Winter for two episodes and then take it away like that RT! I say, as if I didn't knew v5 at all lol

I'm still curious about Tyrian and the fact that he apparently couldn't fight while Qrow didn't have his Sword/Scythe? Did we ever got a reason for that yet?

I think that's all that comes to mind right now lol also, I watched the v5 trailers and I just had to say how much I love them <3 Blake's probably my favorite, but they were all great!

O better keep watching now lol I gotta watch as much as I can before saturday!

#rwby #bumbleby #long post #just salem rambling around #pre volume9 rewatch

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pinkcadillaccas · 1 year

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All this Goncharov posting reminded me of when I had to write a review of a film for some arts award thing we did in year 10. I managed to dig it out of my laptop if anyone wants to read it:

Goncharov (1973) as an example of queer representation in mid century film.

Scorsese's timeless masterpiece, 'Goncharov', is not unique in its position as a film made in the heterosexual world that found popularity within the queer community. However, what makes the 1973 mafia epic different is the varied and ever enduring nature of its portrayal of queerness. The two potentially queer couples, Goncharov and Andrei and Katya and Sofia, vary massively in how and why they come to be so involved with queerness in a decade still full of anti queer sentiment; and yet both, despite societies changing perceptions, remain convincing and touching romances to a modern audience.

Begining with Katya and Sofia, this couple tend to be deemed 'problematic' by some fans, owing to the homophobic and misogynistic stereotypes on which Sofia's implied saphic nature lie. Unlike Andrei and Goncharov, Sofia was written with the intent of a 1973 audience reading her as queer, achieved through thinly veiled sexual metaphor and, unfortunately, her role as an antagonist to Goncharov. She is founded on the age old myth of the queer individual wishing to lure innocent straight men and women into a life of debauchery, she introduces Katya to a life separate from men and her husband in a way that can be seen to ultimately cause Goncharov's downfall and Sofia's survival. Furthermore, she commits the worst crime a woman can, not only is she a lesbian but she knows it, she dares to take ownership of her sexuality and display it to a woman from a background of strict traditional values and family dynamics.

Sofia was undoubtedly written as queer, for better or for worse, and shows many of the issues with how mid century film can portray queerness as something corrupting and evil. However, there is love enduring in their plot as queer audiences were able to look past what she may appear to be, as they have done with so many queer coded villains and villainous women, and saw a strong, brave and proud character willing to risk her life to bring another powerful woman into the light and out of the darkness. Their softer moments together act to successfully move the relationship out of the territory of plain homophobia and into something far more complex and beautiful.

Furthermore, to a modern audience who may not be as familiar with the queerphobic tropes of the early 1970s, the relationship reads as more of a modern feminist tale of female empowerment, giving the story of the passionate lover and the torn wife a new lease of life outside of its original context. There is no denying that despite the problems, the subtlety of the hints to her sexuality (either as a perceived kindess to the community from the creators or because of the litany of laws surrounding depictions of homosexuality in the era) and the lack of open hostility towards it as a result means that Sofia's origins do not define her and she is able to break free of her original purpose in the hearts of many.

Following in their wake are Goncharov and Andrei, the couple whose relationship is central to the fast moving plot of the thriller. Unlike the previous couple, neither of these characters were intended to be received as queer by a regular audience and are a classic example of the tragic bromance. If you were a woman we would be in love, but since you are not we can only ever be friends; unsurprisingly, this story repeats itself time and time again through couples such as Kirk and Spock of Star Trek and Dean and Cas of Supernatural. The strength of their male bonding compared to Goncharov's relationship with Katya and Andrei's status as an unlucky bachelor sets up the perfect dynamic in which to find queer romance. In many ways, the story revolves around the development of their relationship and their closeness.

This is even noted by other characters, such as when Mario taunts Andrei with their relationship midway through the film, claiming "if only your Goncharov were a woman you could keep your little prick wet for years". Another case of 70s macho homophobia (which at the time would not be out of place as a way to mock a perfectly heterosexual man) backfiring as it points out to the audience the possibility of a romantic nature to their relationship, which once seen cannot be unseen. Andrei's reaction only furthers this, it could be seen as a typical recation to an insult but it could also ring true to many as a queer man shocked at facing the mocking reality of his hidden self.

The couple is an accidental thing of beauty, only allowed to get as far as they did because at the time it would be unthinkable to the sensible heterosexual audience that two men as macho and agressive as these could be queer. They are both queer and not, together but not, they are tragically unexplored and unfinished. Due to their nature they are, much like the titular character, doomed to run out of time.

The film is a masterpiece but it is not above criticism and as much as it resonates and brings joy to many queer people it is important to note where this comes from. 1970s America was, for many, a place full of homophobia and tragedy. The beauty of the film is that through its incidental and intentional queerness and homophobia it not only tells beautiful stories of queer love, but it brings a slice of queer life from the period to the modern viewer. Through different lenses than the one intended to view it through Goncharov offers many interpretations of tender, passionate, dramatic and toxic love stories that are timeless. Scorsese's most underrated work gives us a unique combination of various elements of mid century queer representation in the mainstream and has left a lasting mark on the community as a result.

#goncharov #gonchposting #al is talking

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demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 10 months

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Pride Month Character Sexuality Headcanon Moodboards 1. Yasmine - Lesbian 2. Demetri Alexopoulos - Gay 3. Moon - Bisexual 4. Eli "Hawk" Moskowitz - Bisexual

Welcome back, Cobra Kai pride month moodboard followers!!! This time let's hear it for Moon Nolastname, our one canon bisexual queen!!! She's so important to me fr <3 <3 <3 Granted, her dating a girl for 2 seconds was not NEARLY the epic sapphic romance she deserves, but I'm still so happy it's canon she likes women <3 <3 <3

I also still maintain that she has more chemistry with every female character she's ever interacted with onscreen (including that one random blonde girl in the pink dress who she danced with in the prom episode) than she ever had with Eli, eat your heart out bird boy akjsdnhukyghju

ANYWAYS I figure I don't need to back up why I think she's bi when it's been literally confirmed canon by Word of God (if you want to count that, anyways), so I'll use this bit to dive into why I'm a Lesbian Yasmine/Biseuxal Moon truther and why Moon being bisexual (and not a closet lesbian) actually makes perfect sense to me!

Throughout the show, she definitely shows enough general interest in boys to lead me to believe she doesn't exclusively like girls. She's lowkey flirty with a guy named Rory as early as 1x02 (the one she wants to do a flip for her insta channel!), and she seems to be the one to make the first move with Hawk in 1x09. In the soccer episode of Season 3, we see her having a friendly chat with a football player that could be seen as a little flirty. Compare this to Yasmine (who I think is a lesbian!), who doesn't really interact with any boys outside of Kyler in S1 and doesn't even really acknowledge Brucks, despite him following Kyler everywhere. In later seasons, Yasmine only really interacts with Demetri (and occasionally Eli) while Moon is shown to be amicable with Demetri, Miguel, minor male side characters like Rory, and enough boys and girls to throw an enormous house party in 5x08!

So admittedly I am one of the biggest h*wkm**n haters of all time. Catch me still in denial that they got back together in S4 because no they didn't <3 HOWEVER!!! From how, uh...spirited their first make-out session was in 1x09, I can buy that there is definitely physical attraction there, if little else. Whatever emotional connection they do have I think is shallow at best and actively based on falsehoods at worst--Moon only really likes Hawk's fake overconfident facade, and isn't shown to have much interest in him beyond surface-level things (I mean, for fuck's sake, she said she liked his biceps and his cool hair while dumping him, like!!!). Hawk, meanwhile, seems to kinda put Moon on a weird pedestal and seems more obsessed with the idea of her than Moon herself. In any case, you don't need to have a deep, profound attraction to all of your preferred gender(s) for your sexuality to be valid, so...even with pretty shallow feelings for Eli, Moon's bisexuality is still totally valid and should be respected <3

Mentioned before, but I do think her initiating with Eli in 1x09 shows some genuine attraction there! And commenting how hot he is in 1x10, too XD It's so impassioned and spur-of-the-moment that it doesn't feel rehearsed and inauthentic in the same way Yasmine's "attraction" to boys often does to me. Moon seems to definitely like muscular, athletic boys--and girls too, if Piper is anything to go by! We love a bisexual with an overlapping type XD

If y'all have spent any time on my page, I'm sure you've heard me rant about Moon's planet-sized crush on Yasmine XD I think a lot of her S1 behavior (and generally hanging out with a "mean girl" clique that seemed counterintuitive to like...how she works as a person) could be explained by her having a crush on Yasmine. She backs Yasmine up unconditionally, even when she feels conflicted about it (like with Sam in the weed-smoking scene in her car), which would make a lot of sense if she had/has feelings for Yas. No coincidence, imo, that she finally gathered up the courage to ditch Yasmine as soon as she found a new mean hottie to swoon over XD No real judgment here btw I was Just As Cringe in high school. We all were.

Also worth noting that she's the only character who acknowledges Yasmine's existence while she's out of town in S2--including Demetri, the guy who supposedly "would kill his friends to get Yasmine to spit in his face"! And it's not even in an explicitly negative context. It kind of sounds like Moon's giggling and kicking her feet about Yasmine having the same bikini as her XD

In later seasons, Moon taking Yasmine back despite Yas's lack of remorse and readily being her best friend again seems to hint that Yas means a lot to her--maybe in a way that goes beyond a simple platonic friendship? The full-body check-out and butt glance she does with Yas in S4 is probably the most damning thing I can give you. I mean.

LIKE. GIRL. WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT.

I could not wear shipping goggles here if I tried. I have watched this scene dozens of times, and Moon is so obviously checking her out that I thought I was going crazy. HOW did this make it into the show??? HOW did they show us THIS and then expect us to buy Moon is into her ex who she's mildly friendly with and who she doesn't even talk to until the girl she really likes is fully preoccupied???

Absolutely batshit.

We've also got Moon a) breaking into excited screaming when Yasmine shows up at the prom and b) completely ignoring Eli the entire prom to hang around Yasmine and Demetri and continually steal glances at Yasmine XD This girl is gone as fuck. Let her date Yasmine, dammit!!! Clearly Eli is not her first choice!!!

Even in S5 she's sitting way too damn close to Yas in that brunch booth and laughing at Yas's dumb little joke about torturing Anthony. She's still gone as fuck. Justice for Moon!!! Let her go out with her dream girl, dammit!!!

And Moon's attraction to girls isn't limited to Yasmine and Piper!!! There's the aforementioned girl in the pink dress she was dancing with at prom (this lovely lady)

AND!!! I would argue Moon even seems to be kind of into Sam, at times! She definitely seems guilty about booting her out of the friend group back in S1, and she's lowkey giving bedroom eyes when the two of them are talking about Robby in S2 XD She looks a bit smitten during the sensory deprivation pod scene as well, and seems pretty down to put her arm around Sam whenever she can :P

Bottom line is, Piper was in fact NOT a phase in the least and I will forever be annoyed that the show kind of implied she was by having them break up for enigmatic reasons (which the conservatives could EASILY spin as "well she didn't ACTUALLY like girls she was just CONFUSED and Piper the Evil Cobra Kai was feeding this poor innocent straight girl's delusion!!!") and then having Moon go back to the male and supposedly straight ex who she had long since outgrown and lost feelings for. Like sure, Moon found a new relationship she seemed happy in and free to be herself in (something she notably could NOT really do with Eli), but CLEARLY that could never have the same (or greater!) emotional weight for her than a brief fling she had with some dude based on literally nothing except physical attraction -_____-

Whew, that got longer than I thought it would XD ANYWAYS, bottom line is that even though Moon canonically swings both ways and is so incredibly valid and sexy for it, I personally think she should date more women. The one exception to this is Robby Keene because Moonkeene is literally the only mlw Moon ship in the show that actually works, and I can and will die on this hill.

Also ngl it would be SUPER funny to see S3 Eli throw a bitchfit because his ex is going out with the mf he hates most in the world and there ain't nothing he can do about it. Like what are you gonna do??? Yell at Moon like she's your fookin property??? That's why she dumped your sorry ass in the first place. Get rekt, bird boy.

Used soft pastels for this because that very much feels like it fits Moon's vibe to me! She's just so wholesome and easygoing--it definitely suits her <3 Very happy I found such appropriate crystal pics to use :D Also I CANNOT tell y'all how long I have had that crystal-and-strawberry smoothie bowl pic saved, looking for the perfect moodboard to use it for...AND BY GOD, I FOUND IT. Sometimes dreams really do come true, kids XD

...I also really want to try that irl now. Like what ARE those crystal things made of??? Are they crunchy??? Are they chewy??? Would they break my teeth??? Guess I'll never know now ;_____;

Now fully convinced that Moon has little shiny colored glass jars in her room with sprigs of lavender and other incense and aromatherapy flowers in them. Her room is a little apothecary full of healing aromas and I love that for her <3

Realized while making this that she's also very ocean-coded (YasMoon and MoonPiper are BOTH water x fire ships, bless). In the ATLA universe, she'd probably be a waterbender healer. Sam would probably be a waterbender too, but she'd be much more Katara-esque and jump to use it for violence XD

As always, pic credits available upon request!

#moon cobra kai #cobra kai #aesthetic #moodboard #ck pride month moodboards #bisexual #cobra kai season 1 #cobra kai season 2 #cobra kai season 3 #cobra kai season 4 #cobra kai season 5 #happy pride 🌈#lgbt #lgbtqia #queer #queer pride

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mrcowboydeanwinchester · 4 months

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🔪 Revenge for Dummies 💋

jomeg fic - 10k - rating: T - high school AU - 2stab2fest - read on ao3

“You said it yourself that being lesbian has novelty value! So it is a popularity move!” Meg shrieks. With blood smeared across her face and eyes wild with the power of standing on a table in two inch heels, she looks demonic. She looks incredible, Jo thinks. She looks like royalty. “We are being QUEERBAITED."

Jo is the queen bee of Midwest High, all until Meg steals the throne by claiming Jo is queerbaiting the school. What follows is the epic tale of Jo’s homoerotic revenge mission. It’s about girlhood and popularity and lesbianism and being a batshit insane 16 year old—with a knife!

written for the brilliantly run 2stab2fest and accompanied by gorgeous art from @keikakudom !!

chapter 1 of 5 below cut!

High School 101

Though it might’ve come as a shock to her 10 year old self, at 16, Jo Harvelle’s life is one long chick-flick moment. We’re talking resident queen bee of Midwest High with a side-dish of blonde bombshell best served hot. She rules alongside her best friend and loyal confidant Claire Novak, and their passionate alliance is founded on the fact they met in the opening weeks of middle school, when Claire found Jo reading Beginner’s Book to Blade Wielding in the quietest corner of the library and asked if she could read it with her.

It therefore may come as a surprise to some that Jo and Claire have ascended the ranks of social status with such ease and grace. Stabby lesbians with dearly departed daddys don’t often tend to work the runways of high school popularity, after all, but the facts of the matter fall like this: Jo has always been an outcast, but now she gets to be distant in the way royalty is and not in the way lepers are. Like, untouchable, but make it chic.

The lesbian thing turns out to be pretty helpful too. Jo and Claire are known for their Biker Barbie lesbian swag, which, at Midwest High, provides the perfect intersection of gender. The boys are into their leather jackets, but Jo and Claire don’t want them back, and the girls crave their nonchalantly fashionable attitude, so Jo and Claire can bask in their heterosexually-awed stares. It’s a perfectly measured concoction of being the most beautiful girls in the whole school but not doing it for the guys. Jo and Claire simply aren’t like other girls, and so all the other girls want to be like them.

So animal skin, pop-punk listening habits, and blonde hair. Paired with the incomprehensible fact they are two sapphic best friends who aren’t in love with each other, the whole school is pliant under their sweet and unbothered thumbs. Claire even had the incredible idea to glue Biker Barbie in pink rhinestones to the backs of their matching leather jackets. They are an inseparable gang of two and they rule the school, stomping past lockers and lesser students in matching black leather jackets, ripped jeans, and gleaming Doc Martens.

And it’s a fucking difficult life.

That’s Jo, right there, the protagonist of our Riverdalian love story.

Yeah, hi, it’s me. And let me tell you, the pressures of being the lesbian leader of hundreds of high school aged monstrosities are pretty near infinite. Firstly, I’m 16. I’ve never even kissed a girl, and somehow being one of the first kids in my grade to come out means I’m some dykey messiah. It’s a pretty impressionable age to be seen as a sexuality first and a person second.

Secondly, everyone in this place is like, stinking rich. Yachts and lawyers and mansions abound and so nobody can ever know me and mom scrape by living above a literal bar. All the rich kids have aloof, only vaguely invested parents, so they can do what they want, but I’m cursed with a mom who loves me and so is ridiculously interested (read: controlling) in my life. It’s just a shame my dad makes up for this by not being interested enough, in that he is dead.

Finally, amid the other infinite reasons why maintaining my monarchal image is hellishly hard, I’m not obliviously iconic like Cher from Clueless. I’m not just some dumb box bleach blonde—I’m the girl who’s making ‘freak with the knife collection’ work for her. That’s a hard line to walk. It’s a fucking tightrope. And I’ve been walking it for years.

On the topic of walking, another of our story’s featured cast is now strutting into view. We’re alongside Jo and Claire in the cafeteria at lunch, gazing down on the masses of normies from the heights of the exclusive Royal Banqueting Table. Popularity is performance, and so the Royal Banqueting Table is the only one in the cafeteria on a raised bit of floor. It’s a stage, essentially; it’s like sitting in the royal box or the back of the bus.

And through the maze of tables, past the nerds and the basketball team and the theater kids—this is a high school, after all—Meg Masters and The Rubies are winding their way towards Jo and Claire. Jo’s hackles raise at the sight of them, and she points them out to Claire with a nudge and a roll of her eyes.

Meg Masters is just like the other girls. She wears tight dresses and little tops and buys all-natural avocado shampoo which has the word ‘organic’ on the bottle but which her daddy flies in from Hawaii. She is rich rich, with the kind of house so big her parents keep their sailing boat in the front garden. But with the hordes of hell hounds baying for blood at the grand entrance of the passcode protected gates, it’s not like anyone at Midwest High has ever gotten the chance to really see it.

Well, anyone at Midwest High apart from Jo.

Because Jo and Meg had been best friends once upon a time, back in kindergarten and elementary school, in that squishy age where time isn’t real but friends are. They had been everything to each other, vowing solemnly at sleepovers never to lose the friendship which was blossoming so pure between them.

It wasn’t pure, Meg dropped me the second she got the chance to. The instant we reached high school, the ties were cut.

Jo doesn’t remember exactly how their friendship ended, she just knows it hurt her more than anything else ever has.

Shut up, I remember it. Meg was a bitch. I guess some girls are just built different: she went out shopping with her flaky new rich friends, and me and Claire built a small empire.

It is perhaps pertinent to mention here that while Jo is a very self-aware lesbian, she hasn’t quite mastered the art of feminism yet. She is only 16, after all.

Meg has equipped herself with new friends since the disintegration of her friendship with Jo, and these new friends take the form of The Rubies. If Meg keeps hell hounds at home, The Rubies are the demonic little chihuahuas who cling to her heels at school. Ruby 1 and Ruby 2 are essentially indifferentiable apart from the fact that Ruby 1 is blonde, with mean little bangs, and Ruby 2 is a pissy brunette. Underneath the skin they are both the same: shallow, devilish girls who delight in igniting chaos and looking good while doing it. So while the words Meg and The Rubies sound like a spunky indie girl band, the reality is that they are beautiful, invulnerably rich teens who love nothing better than making everyone else’s life hell.

“Meg and The Rubies at 12 o’clock,” Claire announces to the table.

The royal court of Bela Talbot, Rowena MacLeod, and Billie (nobody knows their last name, in the same way nobody knows Adele’s or Madonna’s—you simply don’t need to) chorus a sympathetic sigh. They are staples of the Royal Banquet Table, being more loyal to the power of The Table than to the current monarchy itself, and so Jo and Claire tolerate them. Rowena’s basically a witch, and Bela’s English, and Jo is pretty sure Billie could strangle her with their bare hands and she’d say thank you, so. It’s not like they’re unattractive company.

Besides, there’s another member of the table Jo is more concerned with.

Dean Winchester leans over to Jo, and in a rarely captured example of sensible advice, says, “ignore them, Jo, they’re not worth your time.”

Dean Winchester is different to Bela, Rowena, and Billie. He makes Jo’s very lesbian brain come to an unwilling and baffling stop. She looks into his dewy green eyes and she hears white noise. He’s a senior, and he exclusively wears his dad’s too-big leather jacket because he thinks it makes him look cool (it kinda does) and Jo would die before admitting that sometimes it feels like no one else’s opinion of her in the whole world matters apart from his.

Hey, fuck off! My feelings about Dean Winchester are perfectly normal.

“Yeah, you too,” Jo replies to Dean. And conversation is a subjective artform, but that is not the correct response to Dean’s previous statement.

Dean smiles at Jo anyway, like she’s somehow fun to be around, and she’s glad that if being the Teen Queen of the school gets her anything, it’s this. Dean hangs out with them some days, when he feels like it. Mostly he hangs out in the school’s garage working on cars, and more recently he’s been spending time in the gardens with the new transfer student Clarence.

My gaydar senses something is up there, by the way.

Jo is at least right about that.

Noice.

But as much as Jo tries to take Dean’s surprisingly sensible advice to ignore Meg and The Rubies, this is proves a lot more difficult than expected when Meg stalks over to the Royal Banqueting Table, steps up on the bench and onto the table itself, and lands the heels of her two inch stilettos right into the bread of Jo’s sandwich.

Jo peers up past the ankle—plump and solid—up the shin—shaved smooth and speckled strawberry—to the thigh—soft and fleshy—and then almost but not quite up her teeny tiny silky skirt.

“The fuck are you doing? Get your weirdly impractical shoes out of my sandwich stat, Masters,” Jo growls.

“Sorry, Josephine, no can do,” Meg says, her dainty lips curling maliciously around her words.

“You know that’s not my name.”

“Oh, is it not? That fact must have walked out of my brain the day you walked out of my life.”

Jo scoffs. “The day I walked out on you?”

“Okay, Meg, get off the table and stop making a scene,” Dean cuts in, trying to stench the flow of petty words before the drama dam bursts. He is unsuccessful.

Meg smiles. “Sorry, Deano. I have an announcement to make, and this table is my stage.” Her voice is rich as honey but dangerous as dart frog venom.

It is then that Jo sees the Gucci megaphone clutched in Meg’s perfectly manicured hands.

This is so not groovy.

“Hear ye, hear ye,” she begins before Claire can swipe the megaphone out of her hands and Dean can try and defuse the situation further. The Rubies are now standing either side of the Royal Banqueting Table like femme-fatale bouncers, effectively immobilizing the royal court.

The whole cafeteria falls obediently silent. Somewhere among the fringe groups, a phone buzzes, and is quickly stifled.

“I know we’re all obsessed with Jo and Claire, our Biker Barbies. They’re the reigning queens of our little high school, right? And what do we love them for? Their cutesy little rhinestone jackets, their perfectly blonde hair? Their lesbian swag?”

Jo and Claire exchange perturbed looks. Around the cafeteria, students are nodding affirmatively; if this is Meg trying to start a Les Mis style anti-monarchy rebellion, she’s gonna have to go a little more opera.

“But what if I told you that having matching Hobby-Lobby jackets isn’t the flex you think it is? What if I told you that they bleach their hair to make it that color?”

An uneasy muttering sweeps across the hall, and Jo suddenly realizes: Meg is working up to something.

What if she tells them about how I live above a creepy bar? What if she tells them about the dusty-ass van mom drives me halfway to school in? What if she tells them about how invested my mother is in my life and wellbeing and how weird it is that there’s only a twenty year age gap between us and that sometimes I feel more like I’m living in a documentary about troubled young women rather than a chick-flick movie?

“What if I told you that little Joey here isn’t a real lesbian?”

Jo almost spits out her water, the laugh comes out of her so hard. “What? Come on, jello-head, I’ve been averting my eyes from lingerie stores since I came out the womb.”

“Is that so, Harvelle?” Meg sings, and her eyes flash obsidian. “Because I have it on good authority that you, self-proclaimed cowgirl and lover of posse, have a crush on Dean Winchester.”

Suddenly everything about the situation is a lot less funny. The room erupts riotously, screeches of jeers and laughter echoing across the hall. Jo feels the blood rush to her face hard and fast, much like how she imagines an erection might feel if it was brought on by intense shame. Next to her, Dean’s minty eyes are wide and staring. She flinches away from him like his touch might corrupt her all-important lesbianism.

“No, I don’t!” Jo cries. Her voice goes unheard over the chaos of the hall.

“Awh,” Meg sighs, pouting down patronizingly at where Jo is now shaking with rage in her seat, “that’s exactly what someone with a massive crush on Dean Winchester would say.”

“You can’t just say she’s not a lesbian, only she can say that!” Claire screams indignantly. She scrambles up beside Meg before The Rubies can pull her down and wrestles the megaphone from her hands, giving her a solid elbow to the nose as she does so. Meg’s head ricochets back and her nose bursts, bloody in her hands.

“Shut up!” Claire bellows into the megaphone. Her cry rebounds across the far wall of the cafeteria at such a volume several kids covered their ears, and the hall falls sheepishly silent a second time. A few whispers snake across the air, though, and Jo feels her kingdom slip a little further from her grasp. “Use your brains, boneheads. As if Jo would lie about being a lesbian. Where’s the fun in that? This butt-crazy bitch just wants what we have and you can’t let her lap it up.”

“You can’t call me a bitch, that’s misogynistic!”

“You can’t call Jo straight, that’s homophobic!”

Oh, fuck. As much as I like to channel Taylor Swift, I don’t think I can come back from the Q word like she can.

And so that is the day that Jo and Claire lose the Teen Queen crown; that is the day the Biker Barbies’ heads feel the cold sharp cut of the guillotine. Meg and The Rubies are the new reigning monarchs of Midwest High.

#seeing as ao3 is down right now here is the first chapter to tide you all over !!#add this to your festive season reading list it is very silly and fun i promise <3 #jomeg #jo harvelle #meg masters #sapphicnatural #spn fic #ola writes

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