#sorry it takes me forever to write anything anymore!
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“Don’t say forever.”
Janis ‘Imi’ike x overweight fem! reader
Warnings: fluff, hurt/comfort? + self-loathing, coarse language, bullying, implied eating disorder. Ends in smut. Vent writing, I had no idea where I was going with this fic— I just felt shitty and needed to get the feelings out
In which reader avoids Janis for the whole day at school because she claims to be in a bad mood
The second you walked into school, you see Janis approach you. You’d woken up a little late this morning so you told Janis to make her way to school alone first. You forced a smile and went right ahead to your locker.
“What’s wrong?”
“I dunno.” You told her flatly, “I’m in a bad mood.”
“That’s okay.” She told you, eyes closely watching you to decide her next move. Janis wanted to kiss you on the cheek, but she didn’t do that. Instead, she says, “Text me if you want me to take you home, okay? I’ll see you in French class in a bit.”
You simply gave her a nod while you shut your locker, mumbling a ‘bye’ to her and just headed to your homeroom.
You and Janis were separated by classes for awhile, and during which, your mood worsened. All because of nearly everyone in your classes. You excused yourself to go to the bathroom and was luckily allowed to go. There, you unexpectedly ran into Gretchen. “Are you alright?”
“Don’t. Regina’s been making fun of me along with everyone else. You can’t be serious with this. Why are you being nice?”
“She calls me little miss overthinker, thinking I wouldn’t know it’s me that she’s talking about.” Gretchen says. “Not much has changed since middle school.”
“If you’re trying to get me to spill something I can use, you’re not gonna get it outta me.” You stared at yourself in the mirror, sighing. Before she could open her mouth to say anything, you leave.
And then came Aaron in AP Calc class. “Are you okay, dude?”
You flat out ignored him. Though he was truthfully the only one apart from Janis and Damian to have never made fun of you in anyway. At least from what you’ve seen and heard so far. “Aaron, focus.” Mrs. Norbury pointed to him, then at the board.
“Sorry.” He replies quickly.
You hear it, the code names, the chuckles, the occasional full-on cackles. Third class of the day and you couldn’t take it anymore— you leave the room, grabbing your things and hastily carrying your backpack on one shoulder.
You feel everyone watch you leave, including Mrs. Norbury. She doesn’t stop you. You go to the nurses office to hide. Until it was time for lunch, then you saw Janis again. Who at least made you feel a little better with her presence and company.
You had to admit, you let out a sigh of relief at the sight of Janis and Damian. You sit down beside Janis with your lunch tray right in front of you and just poked and pushed at the food with your fork. Janis was then looking at you— you could feel her gaze like they were burning holes into your head. She also had her hand on your thigh, which was something she did all the time. But today, it made you feel worse. You shifted your leg slightly and she got the hint and took her hand away. They knew what was going on, they’ve reported it. But what was done about it? Nothing. Janis was about to tell all of them off herself. But then she would definitely get in trouble.
“Eat your lunch.” Janis said firmly.
“No.” You licked your lips, feeling the lump forming in your throat.
“You need to eat something, baby.” She continues.
“I’m going home.” You decided, leaving as quickly as you arrived. Janis quickly caught up with you though, leading you to her car. You got in, knowing that you couldn’t argue— because you would absolutely burst into tears right then and there in the parking lot.
————
She stops in front of your house and you get out of her car, into your house. You were expecting her to leave, but she doesn’t. Janis follows you inside. You got up to your room and just crawled under the covers after kicking off your shoes, still desperately trying to keep from crying.
You feel a dip in your mattress— Janis laid down with you, her body entirely pressed up against yours. Her arms wrapped around you securely as she pressed a kiss to your shoulder. “I’d kill for you, and you know that.”
“I do, but please don’t.” You mumbled, swallowing thickly. “What they’re saying…is the truth. I’m fat.”
“Baby.” Janis exhales, snuggling closer to you, “No decent person will do that to someone else. It’s wrong. It’s bullying.”
“Well, I’m a human being. I have emotions…I’m sensitive to hate— as much as I try not to listen to them, I still hear all of it. And I just— I cannot think about anything else but crap they’re saying about me.” You took in a shaky breath, tears stinging your eyes.
Janis just held you and let you get it off your chest.
“Saying it once, going ‘I don’t like you’? Fine. We’re not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. But everyday— the same thing, over and over. And for what? I don’t need people telling me that I need to lose weight. I know I do and I have! You know how that went. I gained the weight back, and now too much of it. But I’m—”
Shit, you just burst into tears now. You’ve been holding it in since this morning. “The privilege I had while being skinny…I remember it, how good it felt, you know? But now I just am a joke to them. An object they can whack around and expect me to not be hurt? How fucking cruel is that?! I’m not ‘conventionally pretty’, yeah. But who on earth looks like runway models all the time? What—”
“Nothing will make me feel differently about you.” Janis says after you stopped talking, “Nothing.”
“I don’t deserve it. Any of the love and care and support…whatever you’re giving me. I don’t deserve any of it.”
You feel Janis breathing heavily by your ear as you ranted, sobbing in her arms. “I promised you this the day I asked you to be my girlfriend.” Janis adds on, “I will always love you no matter how much things change in our lives. How challenging things can get, how bad of a day you’ve had…I don’t fucking care what you wear, what you eat, what you drink. What you look like? You can be bald or have a haircut that I don’t like or wear a really silly t-shirt that you have just cause it’s comfy— but I’ll still be here, loving you. I don’t care about all of that. All I care about is that you take care of yourself. That you’re happy, that you’re healthy. You do what you like, as long as you’re living for yourself and not changing yourselves because others want you to. I’ll love you forever.”
You sobbed at her words, wanting so badly, “Don’t. Don’t say forever. That’s not true.”
Janis sniffles, tears beginning to stream down her face. It broke her heart seeing you like that— so upset and feeling so unsafe in a place where so much was promised for the safety and well-being of students, but yet nothing was ever truly taken seriously or done about things like the students bullying you.
“y/n, I’ve been with you for five years…we’ve been through a lot.” She replies, “I’ve never lied to you. There’s nothing I haven’t seen, we’ve been through way worse than this. I love you. So damn much, baby. You’re so perfect, so beautiful, y/n.”
You felt better after speaking your mind— a little. But you still wished the students saying shit would shut the fuck up.
“You’re mine.” Janis says, a hand running up and down your arm, “You’re my girl. You are perfect for me.”
You were still resisting her compliments, but not so much as before. You closed your eyes and just basked in whatever the hell she was doing. Janis started kissing you on your neck, your shoulder again, then your cheeks.
“I’m gonna put all of them in their place, they’re gonna regret that they’ve ever opened their pathetic mouths in the first place.” Janis says, her voice low— threatening. It sends a shiver down your spine as you let your mind wander in that scenario she’d just brought up. “The school won’t do anything? I will. I’ll take care of you. I’ll take care of them for you.”
After kissing your neck a few times, she draws out a small whine from your lips and she chuckles. “You sound so pretty all the time, princess…” She hums, hand reaching down your front and beginning to rub your clit. “You deserve this, baby.” She whispers directly into your ear, her hands roaming all around your body giving it every bit of attention it was swiftly beginning to crave. “Such a pretty girl…” She tells you while squeezing your tit, “Can I take your clothes off?”
You nod, fuck it. Fuck it. You needed her. Screw those shitheads at school.
You give her a nod of approval, mumbling in agreement. She carefully strips off your clothes but you soon become more eager than she was to give you some love. “That’s it, I got you.” The closeness of her mouth to your ear sent a vibration done your spine. You whimpered needily in return. She tosses your clothes all on the floor and started to kiss you again, quite literally everywhere. Now fully exposed to her, she had free rein.
Janis knew exactly what made you tick. She kissed and sucked at your soft skin so tenderly but at all the right spots, eliciting her favourite noises from your mouth. Before you knew it, you weren’t thinking about anything else but her. Which was just what she wanted and what you were hoping for.
Pulling you back closer to her own body, her fingers slid down from your clit right to your entrance. They dipped inside you smoothly, beginning their push and pull to drive you to your climax. Janis went faster and faster based on how you and your body were reacting, but eventually, her fingers leave you. Causing you to be a hot and bothered mess beneath her. Janis’ hands trailed down the sides of your body after fondling with your breasts for a good minute, massaging your thighs and watching your wetness spread. You locked eyes with her, seeing that happy grin on her face and you feel yourself blushing so you looked away.
“Look at me.” Janis said softly, hands still caressing your thigh just how you liked it, “Look at me, y/n.” Very slowly, you do. Your gaze focused on her again as she lowered herself once more to pepper kisses all over your body. Each and every inch of it. It made you crazy. This level of attention, how vulnerable you were…Janis absolutely just took her sweet time worshipping you like you were her goddess and you loved it. You listened to her, and knew that she meant every word.
Your neglected pussy was throbbing painfully with each passing second Janis spent away from it. After a particularly loud moan, her hands reached over to your breast and gave it a massage, her fingers twisting your hardened nipple. Shit. You needed more. She knew it, but she still wasn’t where you needed her the most.
One shaky breath was all it took for Janis to look directly at you. “Hey, hey. Baby, don’t cry.” She cajoled, “Don’t cry, I got you.”
“I need you.” You admitted quietly.
She watches you lovingly, playful glint in her eyes as her lips wrapped around your growingly sensitive nipple. You cried out, the sound dies down to a pathetic whine. Her mouth picks up its pace, making you feral.
“Janis.” You said firmly. Her mouth stops, her eyes flick upward to look at you again, “Hm?” The vibration, again, makes you feel a little bit of something. You exhaled harshly, “I need you. I need you, Janis.”
She smiles brightly, “That’s my girl~” As she kneeled before you, she pushes your legs apart, keeping them bent and she lowered her mouth onto your clit to begin. Her ass being perked up in the air gives your eyes a nice treat and a boost in your arousal. Janis kept both her hands on either of your inner thighs, licking your folds ever so softly. You pulsed against her tongue, which she’s definitely felt. She laughs, breath hitting your heat and you backed away— just a tad. Janis moves herself closer so she could continue properly, at the pace she wanted to. And at a pace you needed to get to your high.
She’d usually pull you back down, but you appreciated this more gentle approach. It was certainly what you needed instead of her usual roughness.
Your hand finds its way to her hair, combing your fingers through it. You could hear that satisfied hum for approval she gave you when you did that. Abruptly, she stops. “Keep going.” You tell her, hand still in her hair. She doesn’t, but watches your face contort and your pussy throbbing and clenching and dripping. But before you could complain, she resumes and you feel the warmth of her tongue against your overheating cunt. “Ah, fuck. Fuck.” You cursed, grip on her hair tightening. The flicks of her tongue become firmer and quicker inching you closer and closer to the edge.
You kept making noises for her, and she kept praising you. You just kept growing wetter and wetter, getting more needy for more of her. “Does my pretty girl want to come?” She asks, voice muffled. You barely got a break when she asked you that, buy was quickly attacked again by her skilled tongue.
“Mm— fuck, yeah— fuck, fuck~” You panted, whining at the end, hips bucking up towards her face. She moves along with you, her hands staying gentle. But her tongue, it was merciless. She slowed then started going faster, alternating between the two speeds up until you had to let go. Then, her fingers slammed into you and found your g-spot quickly, curling up to hit it while her thumb pressed down on your swollen clit, rubbing it as you unravel.
Your entire body trembled as you came, overwhelmed by the pleasure that you were yet to start coming down from. Janis’ thumb slowed down gradually and her two fingers exited you.
“I told you…I’d do anything for you.” She winks, “If this is what it takes to prove to you that I mean it, I will happily fuck you every single day— for the rest of our lives.”
🏷️ Tag list:
@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @reneeswif3 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128
💭A/N:
Told myself I’d be asleep 2 hours ago. It is now 1am and Im tired, but at least I’m not that sad anymore?
#auli’i cravalho#janis ‘imi’ike#janis ‘imi’ike x fem reader#x reader#reader insert#female reader#hurt/comfort#hurt/angst#wlw#lgbtqia#queer#lesbian#mean girls 2024#mgmm fics#vent#vent writing#smut
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over again
ft. leon kennedy x fem!reader
cw: 18+ content, dark content, heavy dub-con, forced ddlg, kidnapping, stockholm syndrome, fingering, p in v, creampie, mentions of past drugging, daddy kink, lots of pet names
a/n: took me forever n ever to write this ahhh sorry :/ hope you all enjoy it !! feedback always appreciated !! hopefully the writers block will finally perish.
word count: 1.6k words
14 weeks. 98 days. 2352 hours.
Leon leaves the house at 7.30 am every morning, except for Sundays. From Monday to Thursday, he's home around 6 pm. On Fridays, he isn't home until around 9 pm. Saturdays are the worst because he's home just after lunch.
Usually, when he comes home, he goes to the bedroom and unlocks the door to let you out. He threads his hand in your leash to take you upstairs, giving you a kiss on your forehead as he takes you to the kitchen to eat a meal. He gives you your food on a pink, plastic princess plate with plastic cutlery, and cuts the food into bite size pieces. More often than not, he hand feeds you.
You don't fight it. You'd learned your lesson. You refused food from him once. For 2 out of your 14 weeks locked up in his home, he'd underfed you to the point of starvation until you were begging him to feed you. He sat you in his lap, cooing all sweet as you chewed and swallowed every mouthful he'd given you. That day was the first day he slept with you.
It wasn't all bad. He was sweet. Gentle. If you closed your eyes, you could pretend he was a loving boyfriend. Someone who cared for you, not the creep who'd snatched you from the street after you had a few too many drinks at your friend's party, promising you a better life, safe from the world.
But he isn't sweet, or nice, or kind. He didn't do this for you, despite what his twisted brain tells him. You can pretend all you want that he's something other than what he is, but it doesn't change what he is. A monster.
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
“Where's my little princess?” Leon's asking as soon as he walks into the house, kicking his shoes off and hanging his jacket up at the door. You recently got free reign of the home for being on your best behaviour. Didn't even have to keep the leash attached to your collar anymore. Lucky you.
“Here, daddy.” You say meekly, poking your head out of the living room to approach him, fiddling awkwardly with the edge of your shirt. Head down, so he doesn't have to see the defeated expression on your face as you force out the words, swallowing thickly to hold back your tears.
“You have a good day, sweetheart? You do any coloring in those cute little books I got you?” Leon's hands come up to your cheeks, gently stroking his thumbs back and forth across your cheekbones. You shake your head, gritting your teeth to stop yourself from saying something.
“No? Why not, baby? You don't like them? I got the one with lots of kitties. Pretty girls like you like cute things, don't they?” He coos, squishing your cheeks in his hands to make your lips all pouty so he can lean down and give them a little kiss, letting out a loud ‘mwah’ as soon as his lips make contact.
“You eat at least? I left some food in a lunchbox for you.” You shake your head again, and this time it seems to elicit a worse reaction. His brows furrow, and his hand grips your face even tighter. “No? Silly baby… can't do anything without daddy, can you? Come on. Daddy'll feed you, cutie.”
He heats up some food for you and puts it on a plate. The pink, plastic princess plate. He sits you on his lap and feeds it to you from a fork. Pink, plastic fork. The routine is the same, no matter how much you wish for it to change. When you finish eating, he presses a tender kiss to your head and rocks you in his arms.
“Such a good girl. Good girls get rewarded, princess.” He murmurs, pressing soft kisses against the skin of your neck, trailing them up until he's nosing at the hair behind your ear. His hand slides up your thigh and under your skirt, his thumb swiping your swollen bud through the already damp fabric. It didn't matter if you didn't want it. Your body didn't seem to understand what was happening - all it knew was Leon made you feel good. You hated how compliant you got when he touched you, how any thoughts of defiance melted away.
You go limp when he touches you. Docile. You let him do what he wants to you, just like a good girl should. Back-talking daddy is a big no-no. He wrote that in big writing on the rule list that's pinned to the fridge. Escape didn't use to seem impossible, yet now the thought never even crossed your mind. You'd tried, but he kept a tight lock on you. You wouldn't be surprised to find out one of the many injections he gave you when you were unruly had a tracker in. He always seemed to know exactly where you were.
You whimper as he dips his hand under the waistband of your panties. He parts your puffy lips with practiced ease as he continues on with the next part of his routine. 98 days later and he's mapped every inch of your body perfectly - found out everything that has you keening under his touch. Your hips buck as he runs his fingertip between your folds, gathering slick before rubbing small circles into your clit.
“Poor, dumb baby. She's soaking me already. You couldn't make yourself feel good when daddy was gone, huh, sweetheart?” His words are followed up by a finger burying itself in your tight heat, curling to find that gummy spot that has you clenching around him and bucking your hips. “Pretty princess cunt's been drooling for me all day.”
A choked sob leaves you when he pulls his cock out and sits you on top of it. He pulls you down until he's buried to the hilt, groaning as you tighten around his length. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, peppering it with tiny little kisses. You can't help but cry whenever Leon fucks you. 98 days later and you still sob whenever he bullies your cervix with his dick. No matter how many times he makes you cum or makes you go dumb on his cock, it doesn't change anything. He took everything from you - your family, your friends, your job.
You hated yourself more than Leon. For letting him break your walls down. For clinging to him as he tightens his grip on your waist, manhandling you on his cock, lifting you up and down. For finding yourself missing him when he's at work.
“Love…love you, daddy…” Your words come out more like a cry, nose all runny and cheeks wet with tears as he fucks up into you, his head shifting to hang back in pleasure. His fingers dig into your waist as he hears the words, a breathy laugh leaving him as he smiles - all toothy and bright like it always is when you say that.
“Love you even more, princess.” He grunts out, leaning back on the seat to force himself deeper into your pussy, guiding your hips back and forth so you're grinding his cock inside of you, rubbing your pretty clit against his happy trail. You gasp at the sensation, your hands gripping into his shoulders as your brows furrow in pleasure.
“Daddy… daddy…” You gasp out as your orgasm hits, your lips parting as you gush all over him. The look on your face as you cum is enough to have his balls tighten, his teeth gritting as he starts to shallowly thrust into you once more, chasing his own release. You always cry when you cum, and Leon always kisses the tears away when you do, his lips pressing against the wetness on your cheeks repeatedly. Another part of the ritual, another moment repeating day after day.
“Want daddy to fill you up, sweet girl?” He grunts, nipping at your neck as he wraps his arms tight around your waist in a bear hug, holding you steady as he fucks up into your drippy cunt. “Gonna warm you up right in that cute lil’ tummy.”
His hips stutter as his orgasm hits him, his jaw going slack as he presses the tip of his cock right up against your cervix, filling you to the brim with his sticky cum. He slides a hand under your shirt, his thumb rubbing gentle circles into the skin of your tummy.
“That's it. Keep it all in, okay? Daddy doesn't want to see his little angel spill a single drop.” He says softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. He holds you there for a couple of minutes, cradling you against his chest until it's time to go to sleep.
Before bed that night, Leon ushers you into the bathroom. Like every night before this one, he gently grips your jaw with one hand as he stands behind you, his other hand gripping your pink princess toothbrush as he brushes your teeth, his eyes locked onto you through the mirror. At bedtime, he tucks you in and curls up behind you, spooning you with one hand on one of your tits, and the other wrapped tightly around your waist.
Tomorrow is a Friday. He wakes you up at 6.30 am with a kiss to your head as always, a warm cup of milk in one hand and your breakfast in the other. He feeds you off of a pink, plastic princess plate and presses a kiss to your lips before leaving at 7.30 am on the dot.
#leon s kennedy x reader#leon s kennedy smut#leon kennedy smut#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x you#leon s kennedy x you#resident evil x you#resident evil x reader#resident evil smut#tw dark content
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Hi I’m kinda shy about this one. So the reader has been traveling with dead city cowboy Negan for awhile and she’s liked him for a long time but she’s a virgin and she wants him to take it.
Don't be shy bb, I am a slutttt for dead city Negan. Basically, think of this as if you were in Ginny's shoes, but you're 18.
Our Little Cabin
Dead City!Negan x Reader
Warnings: smut, 18+, NSFW, virgin reader, vaginal sex, fingering, family death (reader's mom), reader seduces the hell out of negan, extreme age-gap (reader is 18, negan is 50ish), masturbating (both), masturbating in front of Negan while he refuses to touch you, daddy-kink, breeding kink, cuddling, pure filth
A/n: If you like slow burn, sexual tension and a "hard to get" daddy Negan, this one is for you. I promise one day I'll finally write a fic without daddy-kink, but today is not that day.
"Can we go home now, Negan? My legs hurt." I complain, dragging my feet lazily through the leaves.
He stops and sighs, resting his hands on his hips. I stop too and stare at him. That damn cowboy hat.. I swear he wears it just to tease me.. and it's working.
"Yeah, doll. Sun'll be going down soon anyway."
"Ugh thank god." My head falls back dramatically and he chuckles as we start our way back.
Negan took me under his wing a few months ago when some assholes attacked Oceanside, killing my family and everyone I know. I was lucky - if you wanna call it that - enough to escape. I ran into Negan in the woods and it's just been me and him ever since. I'm thankful for him, considering I never had a dad or father figure growing up. My mom was my best friend.. and now she's gone. But at least I have him.
I've grown attached to Negan over the recent months.. But something feels.. different lately. I'm not sure what suddenly changed over the last few weeks, but I've caught myself imagining things about him that I shouldn't. Even touching myself to the thought of him. I feel so guilty afterwards, but I can't stop. I've never been with anyone.. never kissed anyone.. never touched anyone. And my body is screaming at me for it. I can't even look at him anymore without imagining what he looks like under his clothes.
"Why're you so quiet, kid?" He glances at me as we walk.
Ugh, I hate it when he calls me kid.
I shrug. "Just thinkin'."
"About?"
"Doesn't matter." And I've convinced myself it doesn't. I'll never be with someone romantically, because for one.. it's the apocalypse. It's not like I have a school full of hot boys lined up ready to ask me to prom. Not that I'd give them a chance anyway. I'd probably be more into the teachers. And second, the man I want would never think of me that way.
"That's not true."
"You don't even know what I'm thinking, so how can you say that?"
"Anything you think about - worry about - matters to me, y/n. So, spill."
We finally make it back to our little cabin. We've been staying in it for awhile, stocking it with food and supplies. No one has found us yet.. It's kinda nice. But I won't get used to it. Because nothing good lasts forever.
I throw myself on the couch dramatically, as if our walk that we've done a hundred times now could've killed me.
"I don't know... I just, I feel like most kids - people - my age have already experienced more in life that I have."
"Like?"
"Sex." I blurt before I can stop myself. I look to Negan to see his reaction, but he's surprisingly not that alarmed. His eyebrows are raised as he studies me, probably more shocked that I actually had the balls to say that in front of him.
"Listen, I don't really feel comfortable doing the whole birds and bees talk with you."
My cheeks turn pink with embarrassment and I nod disappointedly.
"Sorry, it's just.. I - no one's really talked to me about it before. My mom said she would when I was ready.. but then she.. she.." I fight back the tears. I hate crying. You can't come across weak in the times we live in and I've been forced to be strong my entire life.
He looks at me finally and sighs, holding his arm out for me to come snuggle next to him. It's not the first time he's held me as I've cried over my mom. Won't be the last.
I bury my head in his chest, sniffling, as his hand rubs my back.
"Alright, kid. What do you wanna know?" He gives in, feeling sorry for me.
"Well, I know how it works, but I guess I just wanna know what it feels like." I feel him tense underneath me as he adjusts himself awkwardly.
"No boyfriends at Oceanside?"
"There were boys.. but none that I was interested in."
"You'll find someone when the time is right. You're still young."
"Well you don't have anyone, and you're.. not young."
"Jeez, kid. Thanks." He chuckles. "I did have someone. A few someone's actually. Lost them all to this cruel world." He admits and my heart hurts for him.
"Well, you have me now." I get more comfortable, laying my head in his lap and looking up at him. He shifts uncomfortably but eventually relaxes and even strokes my hair lightly.
"Yeah, I do. And nothing is going to happen to you. You're safe with me, doll." Butterflies swirl around in stomach, but I know he doesn't mean that in the way I wish he did. He sees me as a kid.. hell, as his kid. For a moment my heart sinks from jealously at the "someones" he mentioned. Lucky bitches.
"...Negan.. does it.. feel good?" I blush a little.
"Sex? .....Yeah, doll. It fucking feels good."
"Will you.. show me?" I stare up at him innocently and his hand abruptly stops stroking my hair.
He bends over, planting a kiss on my forehead. "Time for bed, darlin'." He pushes me gently up and off his lap before standing and heading to his room. The cabin is small but we each have our own rooms. His is the smaller one, right across from mine. He wanted me to have the bigger one.
I sit on the couch, feeling defeated and stupid. What was I thinking. I relax on the couch for a little longer, choosing to read a book to take my mind off what just happened. After an hour of barely keeping my eyes open, I close the book and head down the hall towards my room. I stop in front of Negan's door, peaking through the crack. He always leaves his door a few inches open just so he can hear if anything happens. My eyes widen when I notice the sheets are barely covering the lower half of his legs, revealing the rest of his body. His tan torso is exposed, showing his peppery chest hair, and his black boxers are low on his waist. I restrain myself from not jumping him right then.
I eventually make my way back to my room and change out of my clothes, throwing on some shorts and a tank top to sleep in. I can't get the image of Negan's body out of my head and find my hand slowly making its way towards my aching center once I'm finally in bed. I close my eyes, imaging Negan between my legs as I touch myself. I don't bother suppressing my moans, confident that Negan is fully asleep. "Mmm, Negan!" The sound of his name rolling off my tongue as I'm pleasuring myself brings me closer to the edge.
"Oh, Negan. Right there!" My door suddenly swings open and I snap my eyes open to see a worried Negan standing in my doorway.. still in his boxers. My hand flies out of my shorts and I throw the sheets over me.
"Oh my god, can you knock?!"
"I - you yelled for me." He says flustered. I notice the way his face reddens when he realizes what I was doing.
I gently pull the covers off me again and spread my legs a little.
"What are you doing, y/n?" He stands in front of me at the doorway, refusing to look at anything other than my eyes. That's okay.. I bet I can make him look at me down there. I like the challenge.
"What's it look like?" My bite the tip of my finger seductively at him before sliding my shorts to the side, completely revealing my pussy to him.
He glances down with a serious look across his face, like he can't believe I'm doing this. And neither can I. This is so unlike me, but I'm so desperate for him I don't even know how to control myself anymore.
The fact that he's still watching encourages me to continue. I use one hand to pull my shorts to the side and the other to slowly slide a finger through my wet slit. "I just wanna know what it feels like, daddy."
I study him closely, noticing the way his jaw ticks at the nickname. My eyes travel lower and I see his bulge through his boxers. It looks so big, but I'd be determined to make it fit no matter what.
My finger dips inside of me and I arch my back a little and moan, putting on a show for him. He stands with his back against the wall, refusing to move.
I start rubbing my clit slowly and get frustrated when he still isn't reacting. "Negan, please touch me."
He rubs a hand down his face with frustration. "Goddamn it, y/n."
"I just.. I need you. Please." I cringe at my desperate attempt to have him touch me. I need this man so bad it's embarrassing.
"I can't, baby."
"But you like watching me, don't you?"
I take it as a yes when he doesn't say anything and that's all I need before pushing myself over the edge. "Negan!" I cry out as my orgasm rushes through me. Even in the dark, I can see the lust burning through his eyes.
"Go to bed, y/n." He demands but I'm unable to read his tone. Is he mad, proud, annoyed?
I fall asleep at the thought of him giving in and touching me. Maybe if I think hard enough, I'll manifest it.. I heard that shit really works.
Negan's POV:
That girl is gonna be the fucking death of me.
She's been so flirty with me lately and I've been trying to ignore it. But fuck if she's not making it hard. Literally.. I'm hard as a fucking rock right now.
I refuse to touch my dick while thinking about her. She's thirty-fucking-three years younger than me for fuck's sake.
She's confused. She doesn't want me, and she damn sure isn't getting me. Apocalypse or not, it's still fucking wrong.
I drag a hand down my face and sigh. I shouldn't have watched her, but I couldn't look away. She flashed her fucking pussy right in my face and I just stood there.. watching her. Fuck me.
My dick is throbbing and I know I won't be able to sleep until I get some relief. "Fuck it."
I pull myself out of my boxers and immediately start stroking my dick. I think about anything but.. her. Fuck.. y/n. That pretty little wet pussy dripping right in front of me. The way she said my name when she came.
"Ahh, fuuuck. Y/n, fuck." I cum hard and fast and immediately regret it afterwards. Fuck is wrong with me.
I can't - and I won't let myself think about her like that again.
Y/n's POV:
I wake up before Negan and decide to read my book some more in the living room. It's a romance novel that I found one day in an abandoned car. I've read it four times already, but it seems to be the only romance I'll ever get in life, so why the fuck not.
"Morning, sunshine." Negan says sleepily as he walks towards the kitchen next to the living room. He grabs a handful of berries we picked yesterday and tosses them in his mouth before making me a cup full and putting them down next to me.
"Morning. Thanks." I say without looking at him.
He sits on the couch next to me. "You wanna talk about last night?"
My cheeks redden. "Nope."
"Okay, then I will." Great, here comes the lecture. "Y/n, I shouldn't have watched you. We both know that. But, I think you're just confused. It's just been the two of us for months now and you're all young and.. fucking horny and shit. But, us? It can't happen."
I stay silent, pretending to read my book.
"Seriously? The silent treatment? You sure did have a lot to say last night."
I remain stubbornly quiet, popping a handful of berries in my mouth.
"Y/n, I don't understand why you're upset right now. Talk to me."
"I'm not upset." I snap. "I'm embarrassed.. humiliated. I was stupid to think you'd ever be into me."
He sighs and I see his head drop out of the corner of my eye. "Darlin', if I was your age, I'd be all fucking over you. Trust me. Please don't be embarrassed, okay? You are hot as shit and any man your age would be lucky to have you. We can forget it happened if that's what you want." He holds his arm out again, and like always, I snuggle into him.
"I don't want to forget." My hand rests against his white t-shirt and I want so badly to slide underneath it and run my fingers through is tummy hair.
A moment of silence goes by before he finally whispers. "Me neither, doll."
I look up at him, my face dangerously close to his. "I love you, Negan."
His hand reaches up to caress my face as if he's scared to hurt me. "I love you too, baby... Just not like that."
He wipes the tear that falls from my cheek and my heart shatters in my chest.
One month later...
My feelings for Negan haven't faded; I'm just better at not showing them. We've been more touchier than usual... cuddling on the couch, holding hands when we walk, but nothing "inappropriate." We also haven't mentioned that night. It's like it never happened, which still hurts when I think about it.
I get done bathing myself off after dinner and slip into my usual sleepwear before crashing to the bed and pulling my book from the nightstand. I could quote every line in it by now.
I start to drift off right before a loud boom hits right outside my window, following a bright flash of lightning. I try to fall asleep, but every time I doze off, another loud boom jolts me awake. I toss and turn for an hour before deciding to do something I know I shouldn't.
I crack Negan's door open slowly, trying not to wake him and gently slip into bed next to him. I also may or may not have taken my sleep shorts off, leaving me in just my pink panties and black tank top. I ease underneath the covers and lay facing him. He's usually a light sleeper, so between the thunder and me sneaking into his bed, I'm surprised he's not awake.
I'm completely still for a good ten minutes, making sure he's still sound asleep before I make any movements. When he lets out a little snore, I slowly slide the blanket down off of him. I imagine myself reaching over and running my fingers through his thick chest hair. I keep sliding the covers down further and further, careful not to wake him, until I get to just below the waistband of his boxers. My eyes trail from the deep v in his abdomen to the black hairs peaking above his underwear and I let myself imagine what it would be like to touch him right now.. to slide my hand down his boxers and feel him. I've wondered how big he is for so long.. trying to steal glimpses of him through his pants when he walks, or catch him with the covers down while he's sleeping.
I decide to pull the covers slightly further down and my mouth gapes open at the sight. He's hard.. so hard that I can see the outline of him through his boxers as it threatens to poke through his underwear. My mouth waters at his size and I know if he ever put it in me, it would definitely hurt like hell.
After I've stared at it long enough to feel like a total creep, my eyes travel back up his body and I almost yelp when I see his head is slightly turned and his eyes are watching me curiously, as if he's been waiting for me to make a move.
"I - uh.. The thunder.. I got scared." I explain.
"Nice try, kid. Go back to bed."
"Negan, please. Just let me sleep here. Nothing weird, I just.. don't wanna be alone."
He sighs and that alone tells me he's going to let me. I hide my excitement as I turn over, facing away from him and snuggling into the covers. They smell like him.. musk and leather.. and the scent makes me practically feral. He's still on his back, but my ass is barely touching his side. It's hardly anything, and it's not like we haven't cuddled before, but the thought of my ass so close to him sets my insides on fire.
Another lightning strike hits outside his window this time and I flinch a little, not purposely meaning for my ass to press into him even more. He doesn't react and I wonder if he's already asleep.
"Negan...?" I say softly.
"Hm?"
"Will you hold me?"
"Y/n, you are seriously pushing it. Go to sleep."
a few minutes go by before another boom echoes in the distance and I jump a little again.
He sighs heavily and turns over, draping his arm over my waist and pressing his body firmly against mine. His dick is pressed against my ass, but it's not as hard anymore... and that hurts a little.
"Go to fucking sleep."
I hold his hand tightly against my lower stomach and embrace this moment with him. I want him so bad that I can literally feel my vagina throbbing. If it could speak, it would be meowing like a cat in heat right now. I close my eyes and imagine him sliding in me from behind. I get a little too lost in the thought and accidentally arch a little, grinding my ass further into him. I feel him grow to full length against me and the feeling is enough for me to squeeze my legs together, desperate for some pressure down there.
"Where the fuck are your shorts?" He says in a deep and sleepy voice.
I giggle as he breathes heavily into my neck before whispering again.
"What the hell am I gonna do with you, baby?"
"Touch me?"
"I'm already touching you, y/n. My fucking dick is basically between your ass cheeks."
"Not yet.. my panties are in the way." I slip my panties off my legs smoothly and discard them on the floor.
"Y/n." He warns but before he can tell me no, I'm bare from the waist down and pressing my ass back against him.
"Trying to give this old man a heart attack?" He chuckles deeply.
"I can try harder than that if you want me to." I tease.
"Fuck, baby. Go to sleep before I do something we'll both regret."
"Like what?"
"...Like pound that pussy so fucking good you'll never think about another man's cock but mine."
"If you love me, wouldn't you want to be the one to give that to me for the first time? Wouldn't you rather it be you than some asshole who doesn't care about me."
He doesn't answer, so I keep pressing him. I place my hand back on top of his resting against my stomach and slowly slide it lower towards my aching center.
"Don't start something you can't finish, darlin'."
"Oh, I'm very determined to finish." I spread my legs apart slightly to guide his hand over my wet center. His middle finger easily slides between my slippery folds and we both moan at the feeling.
"Goddamn. Fucking dripping for daddy. He growls in my ear before leaning up a little and pressing his lips to my neck from behind. I move my hand from his, letting him take control - finally.
His finger moves back and forth between my wet slit, gliding over my clit every few seconds and making me moan each time. His other hand slips under me and up to my neck, gently squeezing my throat.
"This what you wanted, baby?" He breathes in my ear and chills spread over every inch of my skin.
I nod quickly as I feel my orgasm build from just his light touch. He hasn't even put a finger in me and I'm already on the verge of tears.
As soon as his finger rubs tiny circles over my clit, I lose it.. moaning out for him.
"Thaaat's it, cum for daddy, babygirl."
"Negan!" I scream out as his hand goes from my neck to my mouth, muffling the sound.
"Don't need the dead hearing us, doll."
He kisses my neck once I've soaked his fingers and then brings them to his mouth.
"Mmm, fuck, this pussy tastes so good I might have to eat it everyday."
I turn around in his arms to face him. My hand goes up to hold his face and my fingers play with his gray hair. He kisses my forehead before meeting my gaze.
"This is so wrong, baby." He strokes my cheek gently.
"Can't be wrong if it feels this good."
He tilts my chin up to press his lips against mine. It's so much better than I ever imagined. He knows exactly what he's doing, and even though I've never kissed anyone, he takes the lead and I'm thankful for it. I moan into his mouth when he deepens the kiss, his hand gripping the back of my neck now. The feeling of is tongue in my mouth makes me clench my legs again, and I think he notices because his hand on my neck travels lower until it reaches the back of my thigh. He lifts my leg over his and his hand slides to my ass, squeezing lightly before his long fingers tease my entrance from behind.
His dick is pressed into me painfully and I can't wait any longer. I need to touch him. Feel him inside me.
I reach my hand inside his boxers and pull out his big, hard cock. I try looking at it under the covers between us.
"You've never seen a dick before, doll?"
I shake my head no and admire him. It's so perfect.
He closes his eyes as I stroke it. "Fuck. So innocent, baby."
He kisses my neck while I pull on him even more. "You sure you want this, baby?"
I nod. "Yes, please. I've been wanting this for so long, Negan."
He lines himself up at my opening, my leg still draped over his so that he's in between my legs.
"Once we do this, you're mine darlin'."
"I'm already yours."
That's all he needs to hear to finally push the tip past my opening. I've never had anything inside of me other than a finger, and the feeling of his thick head pushing through me and stretching my walls has my mouth falling open.
"Tell me to stop, baby."
"No, keep going. Please." I beg.
He slides deeper and deeper until he's buried inside me completely. He stays still, letting me adjust. and kisses me through the pain. A pain that feels so good. I kiss him back hard, scratching his back while grinding my waist pathetically against him repeatedly. I moan in his ear and give him the go ahead to start moving. He fucks me deep and slow at first, letting me get used to him.
"So fucking tight baby."
He growls in my ear and vibration of his deep voice sends chills through me again until my pussy flutters around him.
"Holy fuck, doll. Do that again."
I squeeze my cunt around him again and he lets out the hottest moan I've ever heard. Not that I've heard a man moan before, but I just know that his are the hottest.
"I won't last if you keep doing that, baby." He warns and the thought of him shooting his load inside me has my head spinning.
After a few more thrusts that have my eyes rolling to the back of my head, I feel myself reaching my orgasm again and hold him against me so I can grind against him and ride it out.
"Negan, Negan, oh my god.” I breathe out as I push myself so hard against him that my clit rubs against his pubic bone creating the friction I need to send me over the edge.
"Goddamn." He thrusts into me faster and harder. "Gonna make me fucking cum already, baby." He tries to pull out but you tighten your leg around him so he can't pull away.
"Cum in me, Negan. Please." I cry desperately. "I love you. I want all of you."
He kisses me hard before his hips come to a halt. He practically yells out when he shoots his load deep inside me. "Ah, fuck! Babyyy."
The sound of Negan cumming is even hotter than his moaning from earlier - I didn't think it could get any better but holy shit. We're both a tangled, sweaty mess while our hearts beat out of our chest.
We eventually fall asleep with our lips still touching and his softening dick still inside me.
I don't even worry about the possibility of what could happen in the future.. I know I'm safe with Negan.. Here in our little cabin. He gently strokes my hair as we drift back off to sleep.
BOOM. The thunder crashes outside again, but this time I don't even flinch.
"You're not scared of thunder, are you, doll?"
I smile against his chest. "...No."
The End.
Brb, going to take an ice bath.
#jeffrey dean morgan#negan#jdmorgan#jdm x reader#jdmfanfiction#negan fanfiction#twd negan#jdm fanfiction#jeffrey dean morgan smut#jeffrey dean morgan x reader#jdm imagine#jdm smut#jdm fanfic#negan smith#negan smith x you#negan smith x reader#negan x reader#the walking dead negan#negan twd#twd fanfic#twd smut#daddy negan#negan x you#dead city negan
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falling asleep on them with simeon and solomon pls i beg
falling asleep on them
with simeon and solomon.
warnings: use of the terms ‘love’ ‘sweetheart’. not proofread. first time writing for them so could be ooc. also so sorry if it’s repetitive i ran out of scenarios </3
lucifer, mammon & satan’s ver | obey me masterlist
SIMEON felt two arms encircle his shoulders as he was reading. "Hello, my love," he says, taking your hands in his and guiding you to sit down next to him. "Please save me." "Why? What happened, sweetheart?" he chuckled. "the brothers. They're all fighting again, and I can't deal with them anymore, so I'm going to hide here," you sighed, shuffling closer to him. "What’re you reading?" You sneak a glimpse at the book in his hand. "Satan gave me this book; he said I would like it." "Do you?" "So far, so good. Why don’t you lay down here? I'll read it to you." You grin at his offer, quickly settling yourself on his lap, and soon you eventually find yourself drifting off to sleep. Simeon peers down when he doesn’t feel any movement from you and smiles softly. Simeon gently picks you up and takes you to bed. He tucks you in, pressing light kisses on your eyelids. This angel is so madly in love with you like he really doesn't know how he got so fortunate to have someone like you in his life.
SOLOMON was working on some spells when you came into his room and plopped down beside him. "tired?" he asked, shifting a little so you could move closer. "Not really," you lie, your voice heavy and sleep evident in your eyes. Solomon just smiles and continues working while you watch him and try to fight the sleep in your eyes. You were exhausted from a full day of classes and the brother’s antics, but you had been waiting all day to spend some quality time with him due to not being able to give him a lot of time the past few days. you were just so busy with classes and the brothers. He never said anything to you, of course, only giving you a reassuring smile when you apologised for not being able to hang out with him yet again. He was a little upset, yes, but he understands, so he’ll never show it to you. The last thing he wants to do is to add onto your plate. Now that you have the chance to spend some time with him, there is no way you are letting sleep take it away from you. "You’re tired, love; get some rest, yeah?" “I'm not tired at all; I’ll wait until you're finished." "You're so stubborn, you know that," he chuckled, pressing a light kiss on your temple. You feel your eyes growing heavier by the second, and eventually give in and doze off on Solomon’s shoulder. He carefully shifts your head onto his chest and covers you with his cape, a satisfied smile taking over his face as he lays his head on top of yours. Even if the two of you aren't able to spend every moment together, Solomon will forever treasure each and every moment he spends with you.
#obey me#obey me x mc#obey me x reader#obey me shall we date#simeon x mc#simeon x reader#solomon x mc#solomon x reader#obey me imagines#obey me headcanons#obey me scenarios#obey me fanfic#obey me hcs#obey me simeon#obey me solomon#obey me fluff#obey me x you#obey me x y/n#obey me x mc fluff#obey me x reader fluff#obey me!
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Happy Holidays Shana!! I really love your prompts about Greek mythology. Could you write a continuation of Hades or God's and Monsters?
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16
Zagreus is mid word when he stills, eyes going distant. "Huh. I'll be right back."
"You're joking," Megaera says flatly. "You can't just drop this on me and-"
"Technically, Than did that." He would really prefer if Zagreus didn't pull him into this. "I'll be quick. She's calling me, it can't be anything good."
"Who's she?" Megaera demands but Zagreus is already gone. She scowls and turns to the others. "Who's she?"
"Eliana, maybe," Sisyphus offers, completely unruffled at Megaera's ire. "At least take a look out the balcony. This is the highest point in the court and the view is really spectacular."
It is. Thanatos hadn't known the underworld could be beautiful before he'd seen what Zagreus had built.
Her eyes narrow. "How long has this been going on?"
"Oh, I can't say for sure," Sisyphus shrugs, his lips almost curling into a smile. "I wasn't really there for the beginning."
"I was."
They both turn to Patroclus. Eurydice is the only one of them that's suitably wary of either him or Megaera.
"He grew poms in my clearing first," he continues. "It's where we grew things until it became too full and then he created this. Zagreus has woven protections around it, to keep others from stumbling upon it accidentally, but I'm sure you could find it if you looked."
Megaera crosses her arms. "I'm not leaving."
Patroclus shrugs. Eurydice looks longingly towards the door and Sisyphus seems to actually be enjoying himself.
Thanatos stiffens, pain with no physical cause blooming from his chest. "He's died."
"Really?" Eurydice asks, taking a step closer. "He doesn't really do that anymore."
"Except for show," Sisyphus adds, frowning. "But you're both here."
Before Thanatos can decide how he feels about that, Zagreus is slipping back through the mirror, flicking off blood from his arms. "Sorry about that, Artemis wanted a favor."
Thanatos cannot have heard what he thinks he did.
"Artemis?" Megaera repeats dangerously.
"Oh, she told Aphrodite by the way," he adds casually, then pauses. "Actually, she was pretty surprised to see me, so I guess Artemis just called me and let her figure it out herself. Cold."
"Well, this is all unraveling," Patroclus says, but he doesn't seem that worried about it. Not nearly worried about it as Thanatos thinks he should be.
Zagreus shrugs. "They can keep a secret. Also it's been almost fifty years already, this can't go on forever. I suppose I could just challenge Demeter outright?"
"Do not do that," Eurydice says.
Thanatos wants to sit down.
"Have you LOST YOUR MIND?" Megaera screeches, grabbing Zagreus's shoulders. Her nails dig into him, but he doesn't bleed. "You can't do this! You can't - have you - this is crazy!"
Zagreus shrugs, pressing her nails deeper into him. "What's she going to do? Kill me?"
"There will be war," Thanatos says quietly while Megaera seems lost for words.
"Long overdue, if you as me," he says casually. "She's killing a lot of people, Than. She's undermining the other gods and making things worse for everyone all because she lost her daughter. She's turning against her own domain because her grief is more important than her duty. I can't make my mother talk to Demeter. But I have the power to stop her, to put an end to this winter. So I have to stop her."
"This isn't your responsibility, Zag," Thanatos says quietly.
"No," he agrees, expression souring. "It's my mother's. But if the goddess of spring won't do her duty and put an end to winter, then I will."
"Why?" Megaera asks, something small and scared in her that Thanatos hasn't seen since the first time she heard of Zagreus attempting to escape. "Why does it have to be you?
"I am a son of life's beginning and of life's ending." Zagreus says gently. "I know there is balance. I exist because of that balance. When I was born, I had too much of my father, and Nyx filled me with my mother's blood, because I can only exist when there is both." Thanatos hadn't known that, hadn't known how exactly his mother managed to save a stillborn Zagreus. "Who else, Meg?"
She doesn't have an answer.
There isn't one.
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HEYYY🦅
I really likes your megumi drabble. HE SO CUTE😭😭 i kinda wish you write more megumi 🩷
megumi fluff (?) and angst at your service! sorry it took FOREVER i had 478274 exams these past few weeks ughhh sorry & ily thx for the req ~~~
he likes me, he likes me not
jjk fushiguro megumi x fem!reader
all megumi fushiguro does is apologize when he rejects you. everything changes because of your confession.
content: angst, fluff if you squint, all characters aged up to 17-18!!!, misunderstandings, confessions, eventual relationship!, megumi is so bad at feelings, ooc megumi a little sorry, takes place at jujutsu tech high school and shibuya has NEVER happened so life is good, yuji and nobara are your besties
wc: 5.1k
click on my masterlist for more!
“i like you.”
for a moment, the world stills. everything comes to a halt.
megumi is sitting across from you at your favorite cafe, just down the street from tokyo jujutsu high, the school you’ve been attending for nearly two years now.
in that short amount of time, you’ve grown into a person you think the past you would’ve liked. you’re taller now, more fit and lean. you’ve got bounds of experience from your missions piled on your shoulders, the unwavering burden of being a jujutsu sorcerer making itself at home.
you’ve grown in other ways, too. you’re stronger now, you’ve got a good hold on your emotions. you haven’t seen your parents in months, but the sting doesn’t hurt anymore. you’re wiser. older. you’ve got a handle on your feelings.
then there’s megumi fushiguro.
oh, how enamored you’d been.
he’d spared no glance when he first met you. you had trudged into the classroom, eyes darting at the unfamiliar faces. gojo satoru, the undeniably handsome teacher of yours, introduced you brightly albeit the low energy of the room.
you had weaved your way into the jujutsu world, just as you had been able to slither your way into the lives of your newfound friends.
but megumi, oh, megumi fushiguro.
it had taken you laborious months to befriend the raven haired boy. his uninviting attitude hindered your relationship with him for some time, and you had half-heartedly decided to pursue something else, but your near death experience during a particularly difficult mission with him had sent him reeling. he had held onto you the entire time you cried for your mother.
you don’t talk about that day. he doesn’t mention it, either.
“what?” his eyes, dark blue, blink in surprise. his lips are parted slightly. “what did you say?”
your throat constricts. then, the words flow: “i’m in love with you.”
love. it’s too strong of a word. you’re not even quite sure what it means, or if what you feel is actually love.
the cafe begins to bustle with life again. the barista from behind the counter steams some milk—almond—and she glances up at a customer approaching. the music from the overhead speakers filters it’s way softly into your ears. it’s a cheesy love song, and you can’t help but feel like it isn’t the right time for that.
“are you serious?” he says, almost spitting out his drink.
“i mean,” you shrug, “yeah? i wouldn’t bring you all the way out here to fuck with you.”
he blinks again. his lashes flutter perfectly. it’s annoying how perfect he is. there’s a slight hue of pink to his cheeks, but not enough to confirm anything—just speculation.
“i’m sorry,” he begins, breathing it out all in one go. “i’m really sorry.”
if you’re being honest with yourself, you’d seen it coming from a mile away; megumi fushiguro is different. he’s got the composure of a brick wall. the perpetual frown on his face never, ever leaves, not even when he’s with you. he doesn’t crack, doesn’t shake. his soul is hardened from things that he’ll never speak of with you.
“it’s okay,” you say, but it’s not.
you’ve changed—grown into a person you’re proud of, but you’re still stuck sometimes. you’re still a pushover. still just a small shrimp in the vast ocean. still apologizing for your existence.
“i’m sorry,” megumi repeats.
you know he’s apologetic, that he really means it, just from the way his brows furrow slightly. you know him too well for your own good. you don’t think he can say the same about you.
“it’s fine.” your voice breaks. you duck your head in embarrassment. rejection has never hurt you this badly. “you don’t have to apologize for not liking me back. it’s not your fault.”
you wonder why you’re comforting him when he’s the one who has ripped your heart out completely.
“i’m gonna head back,” he mumbles out, hesitating to reach out and dab away your tears with the napkin he’s been wringing around his thin fingers. “you… should come, too.”
you shake your head. “i think i’m gonna finish my coffee.”
he offers a smile. “you can finish mine as well, if you’d like.”
“nah,” you say, scrunching your nose through watery eyes, “black coffee isn’t really my thing.”
“yeah.” his laugh is soft, almost forced, but you can tell it’s genuine. “i know.”
oh, you think. it really hurts.
he knows.
something inside you snaps. your lungs feel itchy. your ribs squeeze. you think that it would’ve been easier to never say anything at all.
megumi leaves the store. the jingle of the bell above the frame rings through the air. you’re left with your cold cup of coffee and megumi’s cup across from you.
the barista gives you a look of pity. you chug down your drink and chug his, too.
it’s bitter.
-☆
megumi arrives to his dorm exactly five minutes after four pm. he slips off his sweater and changes into a pair of sweatpants and a loose t-shirt. his mind is blank, except for the image of your teary eyes.
he swallows nervously. maybe he’ll sleep it off.
“yo, megumi.” yuji slams himself against the door impatiently. “how’d it go?”
megumi sighs, the irritation swiftly making its way into his fatigued body. he opens the door and yuji tumbles in without an invitation.
“what are you talking about?” megumi mutters with another sigh.
“the confession,” yuji says matter-of-factly.
megumi stares. “you knew?”
yuji’s smile slowly removes itself from his lips. “…yeah? it was pretty obvious.”
“what was obvious?”
“that she likes you…?” yuji tilts his head. “and you like her back, right? so i figured you guys would be all cuddled up in here.”
megumi doesn’t say anything. the gears in yuji’s head begin to turn as he looks around the room, noticing the comfy attire megumi has on.
“you said that you liked her back… right?” he raises an eyebrow. “because it’s not a secret that you do.”
“i left.”
“you left her there?!”
“i didn’t know what else to do.”
“so you said ‘yes, i’d like to be your boyfriend’ and then dipped out on her?”
“i didn’t say yes.”
yuji pauses. he looks at megumi, then at the made bed, then back at megumi.
“for fuck’s sake,” he groans, running his hands through his pink hair. “i’m gonna go.”
megumi stands there, appalled. the door is shut harshly and the hinges squeak. he’ll have to scold yuji about that later. for now, he wants to take a nap.
maybe he’ll feel better about everything when he wakes up.
-☆
on the other side of the building reserved for dorms, yuji crosses his way into the girls’ section. it still feels wrong no matter how many times he’s made this trip before.
he meets you on the way there. you’re dragging your feet, headphones strapped on your head, and lips quivering.
“hey,” he calls out, tapping your shoulder. “you okay?”
he waits until you hang the silver headphones on your neck. they’re megumi’s, he realizes as he sees the fading stickers on the metal plate.
“hm?”
“you okay?” he asks again. his eyes scan you for any signs of distress, and he can practically see it radiating off of you.
“yeah,” you hum, “i’m cool.”
“want me to grab nobara?” he suggests with a grin.
“sure,” you say.
the sun feels hot on your back. you hate the way the school is so widespread for having such a small population.
“i can grab some ice cream,” yuji rambles. “and i’ll get us a notebook so we can write shitty things about megumi.”
you pat him on his back, but his sturdy body almost sends you flying backwards. he catches your wrist just before you fall, and he’s laughing at your expression with glee.
“you’re so funny,” he says through his fit of laughter. “you’ve gotten scrawnier. you needa eat more! i’ll get us snacks, too.”
you pout. “shut up, yuji. not everyone can be as buff as you and todo.”
“oh, todo is a whole different story.”
“tell me about it,” you say, playfully rolling your eyes. “i’ve seen him beat you up into a pulp.”
“hey! in my defense,” yuji says, his hands coming up to the sides of his ears, “i couldn’t do much against him!”
you’re nearing nobara’s dorm, which is right across from your own. you like how homey hers is compared to yours. she’s got a knack for interior design, or so she claims.
she swings the door open the moment you reach the inside of the building. you’re halfway down the hall when she sticks her head out from the frame of her room. her black roots are showing more than usual.
“how was it?” she asks once you’re close enough so that she can whisper.
you want to tell her that there’s no point in keeping it a secret. you had told yuji about your feelings far before you even mentioned to her, mainly because yuji had been your first friend at jujutsu high. megumi isn’t here, either, so there’s no reason to whisper when everyone knows.
“bad,” is all you reply with.
her eyes soften a considerable amount, an expression you’ve never seen on her face before. she takes a small breath and pulls you into her room by your arm.
you’re met with her fragrances, vanilla and strawberry—a nobara kugisaki signature scent. she had begged gojo to buy her shelves to place her k-pop albums on and sure enough, the white furniture stands proud at the far corner of the room. there are fake vines hanging from her ceiling right above her desk, where she has an organizer messily places over a few books.
“you wanna dye your hair?” she jokes, looking back at you. “my roots are coming in so we might as well dye yours while we touch up mine.”
“is orange all you have?” yuji’s nose twitches. “i don’t think she’d look good in orange.”
“gee, thanks,” you sarcastically respond.
“sorry.”
nobara clicks her tongue. “wanna unpack?”
“kinda,” you say, your body going limp once you’re at the foot of her bed. you sprawl yourself on the silky sheets and stare up at the ceiling.
“get out, yuji,” nobara demands. she doesn’t even acknowledge his downturned lips.
“i know everything already!” he whines. he shuts the door behind him with much more care than he had with megumi’s.
“still!” she insists. “i wanna have a girls’ talk.”
“i’m one of the girls.” he crosses his arms.
nobara’s shoulders sag. “fine, but you need to go buy ice cream.”
“was planning on that already,” yuji replies. he taps quickly at his phone, presumably asking gojo for his credit card.
when yuji leaves the room, he promises that he’ll get your favorite flavor. once nobara senses that his presence is completely gone, she turns to look at you.
“i’m sorry for making you confess,” she whispers. her tone is comforting, genuine, soft. she takes you into her arms and squeezes your shoulders. “i really thought he liked you back.”
“it’s not your fault,” you reply earnestly. “i chose to do it out of my own selfish feelings.”
“you can cry,” she says, patting your head. at times like this, nobara seems years wiser than you are. her touch is warm.
you bite your lower lip. “don’t wanna. i think i’ll be fine.”
“okay,” she says, and you feel her chest vibrate with the word. “you’re allowed to cry, though. megumi would’ve been a shitty boyfriend, anyway.”
all you can do is let out a watery laugh. you don’t tell her that he would’ve been an amazing lover. he would’ve taken you out on dates at your favorite places because he’s observant like that. he would’ve known your favorite foods, though he knows them even as friends. he would’ve kissed you tenderly because that’s the type of boy he is. he’s the type to love carefully, like he’s afraid he’ll lose someone forever if he doesn’t.
“i’m up for dyeing your hair,” nobara pipes up after the silence that penetrates the room. “yuji’s right, though… i don’t think orange would suit you… ha.”
you giggle. “let’s just touch up yours, yeah?”
yuji’s footsteps can be heard from outside the door when you’re a third of the way done with nobara’s roots. she complains about how long he’d taken, but there’s no real malice in her voice. he explains that he had ran into trouble obtaining gojo’s card (“i had to beg him for it!”).
the ice cream is all melted. it’s gooey and delicious and makes you smile. as you look around your friends, your crinkled eyes say more words than you ever could.
“you’re welcome,” yuji says into your ear. “you don’t have to thank us for any of this.”
-☆
the next morning comes by quicker than you want it to. you mentally prepare yourself for seeing megumi in class at eight in the morning. you haven’t made a mistake as bad as confessing your dying, unrequited love on a wednesday afternoon quite like this before.
nobara had suggested walking with you the night before, but you’d sternly told her that you could handle it. looking back, maybe you should’ve agreed with her offer.
megumi isn’t in class when you come in. he’s usually there at least five minutes before gojo starts teaching. something inside you tells you it’s because of yesterday—as much as you hate to admit it.
he walks in through the sliding doors a few minutes late, but gojo pays him no attention. megumi has privileges like that—at least, with gojo. he’s practically your teacher’s son, and though you’ve never heard of the full story, you’re well aware of gojo’s slight favoritism.
the class is short. all jujutsu sorcery classes are. they mainly consist of typical real school lessons, only because under the law, jujutsu tech is still a high school. the other, much bigger portion of class with gojo is focused on maintaining cursed energy and providing yourself with the best possible victory in battle.
when it’s over, you don’t know if you should be relieved or upset. you won’t be able to see megumi after this, assuming that he’ll avoid you for a good month or two. however, you think you’d rather die than attempt to make conversation with him.
“don’t do anything stupid,” gojo warns, signaling the end of class.
you hear yuji snicker quietly and say, “yeah, nobara.”
the bickering brings a smile to your lips. from the corner of your eye, megumi shifts in his seat.
you decide that it’s best to let the feelings marinate, as stupid as it sounds. it’s an infinitely better choice than moping around and begging megumi for a chance. you may be soft, but you’ve got pride.
“see you guys,” you announce, more to yourself than to anyone.
“alright,” yuji calls after you, “see you later.”
you can’t help but feel a little disappointed with the lack of clinging when it comes to you. your absence doesn’t seem to cause a ruckus like it does for most people. you wonder if it had been yuji retiring early; would everyone else ask him to stay a minute longer?
that’s how life is for a while.
you attend class, spar a little, and sleep. some days you go out into the city with nobara. you avoid the cafe, even though it’s your favorite. perhaps it’s because you’re still embarrassed by megumi’s rejection. on other, slower days, gojo takes you all on outings because he’s basically everyone’s replacement father.
it’s still as tense as ever between you and megumi.
the boy doesn’t make any effort to reach out. you don’t blame him, though you should. he steals small glances at you, particularly when you’re smiling and forget to cover your teeth with your hands. that’s all he takes from you, and he can’t be the only guilty one, because that’s all you give.
on this day, gojo takes you all out to the fair. it’s annual, taking place in the beginning of summer, and it’s a great way to practice forming barriers and such. the fairs always bring out a few nasty curses that need to be exorcised—the four of you are already used to being dragged out here for that sole purpose.
as if gojo knows, he sends you out in pairs. of course, you’re paired with megumi fushiguro. at first, you open your mouth to reject gojo’s demand, but you notice the way megumi doesn’t seem to care and your resolve hardens.
“it’s really awkward around you guys.” gojo pretends to act busy, flicking something from his nails. he’s got his sunglasses on and the ladies around him fawn.
“huh?” you and megumi look at him with accusing glares.
“is something going on between the two of you?”
“no,” you say almost entirely too quickly.
“right,” he drawls, a smirk forming on his face. “anyway, good luck out there. get rid of the little ones and then—i don’t know/-meet up with yuji and nobara if there are gross ones that’ll kill you.”
megumi nods. “okay.”
“this was what i was talking about,” gojo mutters as he walks off. “it’s soooo awkward…”
megumi gives you an apologetic look. “for the record, i don’t think it’s awkward.”
“it’s fine,” you say. you find that you’ve been pardoning him quite a lot. “you don’t have to lie.”
his face flushes. “i’m not.”
“i confessed to you and you don’t like me back, so there’s really no need to tiptoe around it anymore,” you rush out. “just treat me like normal. i don’t really care.”
he looks hurt, and you want to laugh.
you discover that, in those days of being alone, you’d rather megumi treat you like a friend again than be completely ignored. at least then, you’d have a part of him. at least then, he’s not slipping through the cracks of your heart, becoming a distant memory.
you want him to be anything but a memory.
“you want me to treat you like normal…?” he repeats your words. he paces himself just a few steps behind you when you begin to walk away from the conversation. “what does that mean?”
“i think you know what being friends is like,” you attempt to joke, but it comes out harsher than intended.
the fair is getting more crowded by the second. the shopkeepers are yelling out cheap deals and there are children that snake in and out of the lines of people. paper lanterns are hung at the front of tents to attract foreigners—it seems to be working because there are more people surrounding shops with lanterns than without.
megumi takes a breath. “how could i do that?”
your steps falter. “what do you mean?”
“how can i go on to treat you like normal,” he says softly, “when i know you’re in love with me?”
you bite the inside of your cheek and taste blood. “i don’t know. you’ve done it before without knowing my feelings. you can do it all over again, right?”
you look over your shoulder to see his lips part. he’s given up on the cool-guy persona. his vulnerability begins to show through the dents in his personality.
“you’re saying that you’ve liked me for that long?”
“yeah,” you admit. something about this is more freeing than you could’ve imagine. “i think i always have.”
a man shoves himself into you. he’s older with a beer belly and a scruffy beard attached to his face. he barks at you to move out of the way as he drags his young daughter through the sea of people. megumi’s warm hands come to rest on your waist, pulling you aside and closer to his toned chest.
you do your best to ignore your beating heart.
“i’m not,” megumi starts shakily, “lovable. i don’t know why you like me.”
your body goes cold. it's even worse than when he'd rejected you.
“curse,” you say, detaching his hand from your body. “i feel it around the back alley.”
the night ends. nothing is solved. you go to bed and curl into yourself.
-☆
loving megumi is weird. there’s an odd sense of comfort to it, like you’ve known him for longer than you actually have. he makes you feel safe even though he's gruff and a little mean about it. maybe that's just part of his charm, though, because it makes you love him even more.
he seems to have taken your words seriously; he starts to treat you like normal again. he doesn't avoid you anymore, and the obvious tension surrounding you two has disappeared for now. he lets you take a few of his sweaters when you forget to do your laundry and he buys you your favorite snacks sometimes.
it gets to be too much. you almost wish he'd go back to ignoring you. the grass is always greener on the other side.
summer goes by slowly. it's the prime time for bad feelings to manifest into curses. you push away your lingering feelings, convincing yourself that you've gotten over it. it's been more than enough time now, coming up on two months since you've confessed. you don't want your resentment, if you can call it that, to form any bad curses—you'd hate for them to be attached to megumi. that'd be a burden too hard to carry.
a few missions involve partnering up with megumi. gojo thinks you two work well together; there's a sort of synergy that you have with each other that is hard to come by sorcerers nowadays. you don't mind the compliments, or at least you pretend you don't.
the missions aren't difficult, but maybe that's because you've grown stronger. megumi has, too.
summer passes. it still hurts.
"you're confusing me," you whisper.
you and megumi are shopping for a surprise birthday party that gojo is forcing you guys to throw for nanami kento, a good coworker of his. you've met him more than once, and you're not really sure if he'd appreciate such a last minute party. regardless, you and megumi are tasked with finding enough balloons to fill the poor man's office.
megumi doesn't allow you to hold any of the bags. he lies and tells you that it's out of habit—nobara makes him carry her shopping bags every time they go out—but you know he's doing it just because he wants to. you're perfectly strong enough to carry a few paper bags, and he doesn't carry nobara's bags like he claims he does. megumi doesn't even go shopping with her unless yuji's there and even then, yuji holds the bags.
"sorry?"
"why are you doing this?" you refuse to look at him.
"doing what?"
"this," you say, gesturing at the two of you. "why do you act like we're close enough to do this?"
you cringe at yourself, aware of how hypocritical you're being. you had wanted this, wanted him to go back to being a friend, to treat you like he had before you went and ruined everything. why are you angry? why do your eyes well up with tears as he steps closer to you?
"we aren't close?" he asks. his arms fall to his side.
passerbys give you curious glances. he takes off his sweater, the one he always wears depsite it being humid out, and wraps it around you. the paper bags filled with confetti and paper plates are set down by your feet. he pulls the hood over your head to hide your wet eyes.
"we are," you mumble out sorely, "but not like this."
"i'm sorry," he says, and you're brought all the way back to the day you had told him about just how much you liked him.
"'s not your fault." you sound like you're trying to convince yourself and not him. "i'm being an asshole. you can forget about this."
you don't want him to feel guilty. he can't help how he feels, after all. you don't want him forcing himself to love you.
"what you said that day," he coughs out. the bags crinkle as he lifts them from the pavement. he continues, "what did you mean by 'always'?"
you squeeze your eyes shut and he pauses next to you. you can feel his soft gaze on you and you're glad you can hide behind his sweater, the cloth draping over you like an oversized blanket.
"i don't know..." you tilt your head up to look at him. he looks like the boy you think you'll always love. "i think i was doomed from the start."
"doomed?" he says, a little amused. "loving me is dooming? how sweet of you."
you need to remind yourself that he's not playing with your heart; this is how he copes—and how you cope, too. he must know you better than you had thought.
you nearly scoff. "it's because you're you. you're so good at being you that it hurts."
megumi slows. you hadn’t even noticed that he'd been guiding you down the sidewalk the entire time until now.
"i think it applies to me, too," he say quietly.
"what?"
"'always' applies to me, too." the clarification does nothing to settle your nerves.
"i don't understand," you blurt.
he gives you a look, as if to say, "really?", but he keeps talking, "i think i'm used to this feeling because it's always been there."
"what feeling?"
he shrugs. "you pissed me off when i first met you. you're really stupid, you know?"
your face morphs into an irritated expression. "thanks. you're pretty great yourself."
he laughs and it sounds like music to your ears. "i wasn't finished, dummy."
"sorry."
"you're pretty... a lot more than you think you are," he admits shyly, "and i guess that annoyed me because i kept feeling all weird around you. i got used to it, i think—that weird feeling. but it's always been here. it never left."
you stumble, tripping over your feet at megumi's statment. you don't want to interpret it the wrong way, but with how he's looking at you, you can't help but maybe think that he likes you too.
"this isn't how i wanted to tell you, but," he breathes in sharply, "i don't like it when you cry."
it's awkward. perhaps a little funny, if you really look at it, but it's megumi and you can't hate him. you'll never find it in yourself to truly hate him.
nanami's surprise birthday party isn't much of a surprise. though gojo nor nanami say it, you all know yuji is a favorite of theirs, and no one is surprised when yuji says that he had accidentally revealed the party a few hours prior.
gojo has fun. even shoko, who never shows up to any of these events because of her busy schedule as a doctor, seems to enjoy herself. nanami pretends like he's not entertained, but he has on a fond smile that looks weirdly similar to the way megumi smiles. you're all old enough to party now, as gojo puts it, so it's a little less like a classroom celebration and more like a familial one.
it's the third of july, nearly two months and a half after your confession, when megumi hints that he feels the same way about you.
you don't know what to make of it.
-☆
"i like you."
you're in the middle of getting ready to go out with nobara and her favorite upperclassman, maki, when megumi tells you he likes you back. your eyes widen and the mascara you've just finished putting on smears on your lid.
megumi hands you a makeup wipe as if he's done it a million times before. (he hasn't, but he just knows.)
"w-what?" you stutter out, your breath catching in your throat.
"it took me a while to figure that out," he says.
he's flat on your bed, covering his face with his arm. his t-shirt rises with each of his nervous movements. according to the rules set by gojo, he shouldn't even be here in your dorm. he shouldn't be on your bed and listening to your playlist through your shitty speaker gifted to you by yuji.
"are you joking around?"
"what?" he sits up and turns to you, frowning. "why would you think that?"
"is this you pitying me?"
"i just," he sighs, frustrated, "i needed to tell you before i chickened out. i meant what i said the other day, you know?"
"about you getting 'used to' the strange feeling?"
he nods and then slouches back against your pillows. if it had been any other day, you would've felt shy about sleeping in his scent.
"yeah," he says, running his slender fingers through his jet black hair. "i really did mean it. i think i just—i don't know—pushed you away because i was afraid."
you've given up on applying your makeup by now. your hands are shaking too much, anyway.
"i'm scared sometimes, too," you reply, catching his eyes in the reflection of your vanity mirror.
you see the side of his lips turn upwards. he looks as handsome as ever. he's gotten older since the first time you met him, and it hits you harder now that he's on your bed, his features sharp and his body lanky and tall. there's a sort of intimacy that you sense between the two of you.
"i'm not afraid anymore." his legs swing over the bedframe and he easily reaches the ground even though your bed is raised. "i'll be brave for the both of us."
oh.
"what do you think?" he tilts his head.
you stay home that night.
-☆
"so are you guys dating now?" yuji exclaims.
you both freeze.
"fuck off," megumi says instead of answering the question.
"god," yuji huffs out. "finally! all those peptalks and you don't even tell me that you got the girl?"
megumi blushes from beside you. neither of you had expected yuji to be awake to witness you two watching the sunrise on the hill beside the school.
"you know," yuji grumbles, "it took a lot of convincing to have you realize that you've been in love this entire time, megumi. the least you could've done was tell me."
megumi ignores him and snuggles further into you.
"why are you up so early?" you ask, shuffling underneath the blanket that is covering you and your boyfriend.
"instinct." yuji's shoulders drop, defeated. "'k, i'm gonna leave you guys to be romantic and shit up here. have fun explaining this to nobara later."
nobara almost wrings your neck out when she catches megumi holding your hand that saturday morning. she tells him that he needs to make up for the months he left you feeling sad. he says he's already forgiven, and he's not wrong (because you're weak when it comes to him, just like he's weak when it comes to you).
you think that you would've chose to love him no matter the outcome. loving him is easy like that.
a/n: oh my god. this was a word dump and not proofread. i am so sorry this took forever to come out but i ended up changing the plot like a billion times cus it wasn't good enough.. LOL. hope u enjoyed this!!! thx for making me write more megumi because i love writing him (he's been my fave character since the anime came out three years ago hehehe). ngl it was kinda rushed bc i wanted to get this out but i think it turned out fine!!!! ok thx once again ily muah xx
#jjk x reader#megumi x reader#megumi fushiguro#megumi angst#megumi x you#i love megumi sm#he’s been my fave since i was like 15 so you know i had to write this up#sorry this took forever#yuji and nobara are really good friends#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you
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I’ll wipe those tears til’ they stop falling.
or, they help you fight your demons, featuring: bofurin + jo togame
a/n: this was originally an ask, but I accidentally lost the original ask (I’m so sorry about that love!) and had to create a separate post. writing these actually gave me a sense of comfort as a long-time survivor of depression/self harm, and i hope it can give you all some comfort too if you’ve ever suffered from that <3
c/w: fairly heavy themes, such as undertones of depression/anxiety/self harm/relapse/bullying/suicidal thoughts/social anxiety (these aren’t explored too deeply, but they are there), hurt/comfort, fluff, soft!boys, protective!boys, established relationships, some language, hugs, self-harm scars, minor bad thoughts, togame’s has a very very little bit of spice in it
you are so strong and beautiful; keep holding on darling <3.
“…I just don’t know if I can take it anymore, ume.” you sniffed, eyes glistening with tears that you desperately wished not to shed. “I don’t even know what’s wrong with me… I thought I was past all this.”
you had been keeping your distance from your boyfriend for a few weeks now; your conversations with him had grown infrequent due to your lack of energy. your own mind had been sapping it from you, filling your chest with a sense of isolation and hollowness as it forced you to push everyone away.
you didn’t understand why umemiya wasn’t angry at you, or why his eyes still glowed with ever-deepening adoration — he was sitting with you as if no time had ever passed, as if you hadn’t nearly cut him from your life.
umemiya’s hand was large and warm around yours, his long fingers slipped comfortably between the gaps of your own. he listened to you talk with a soft smile on his face; despite the turmoil rioting within you, the gentle expression still made your stomach erupt into butterflies.
“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you,” umemiya finally murmured, voice softer than you’d ever heard it before. “feeling emotions is proof that you’re alive. and it’s okay to not be okay, you know? but…”
umemiya used the leverage of his grip on your hand to pull you closer to him, until you had to shuffle into his lap just to avoid crashing into him. his body was warm beneath and against yours, and when he pressed your head comfortably into his chest with his other hand, his heartbeat seemed to resonate with and control your own.
“…when things start to get hard, don’t try to tackle them all alone. if you find that your strength is wavering, come to me. I’ll be your strength instead.”
those tears that you tried so desperately to keep at bay slipped out of your eyes like slick oil, sliding down the curve of your chin and plopping onto the front of umemiya’s shirt. your heart was shaky in your chest, each beat feeling constricted with the weight of intense emotions.
you weren’t even sure which one took the most precedent — happiness, shame, love, relief, frustration… they were all rampaging inside your chest, threatening to tear you apart at the seams.
god, you didn’t want to cry anymore.
“if you need to cry, don’t hold it back. I’ll stay with you — forever and ever, okay?”
well, as long as umemiya was there, maybe it was okay to cry for a while longer.
there was an itch beneath your skin; one that was insistent and familiar. the voices around you grated in your ears, rousing up static within your mind. your breath rattled in your lungs as you tried to suck down air as inconspicuously as possible. when had it become so stuffy in here…?
pothos was the group hangout — one that you had become comfortable and familiar with. any other day, the clamor within it would have soothed you; the clinking of silverware, the harmony of your friends’ voices melding together, kotoha calling out orders or yelling at your booth to settle down.
but right now, it felt like too much — your skin was going to peel off. before you could stop yourself, you brought your hand up to your wrist. pain bloomed along your skin as you dug crescents into the tender flesh. the pain morphed into an anchor, one that could keep you from being tossed around by the tumultuous waves.
but all too soon, that anchor was ripped from you — by none other than sakura, who grabbed your wrist to halt your movements.
you fixed him with a look of shock — you were unable to read his eyes; you couldn’t see any anger, or disappointment, or shock. they were brimming with an emotion that you couldn’t identify.
sakura remained silent as he pulled your hand towards his body, and you watched as he guided it down to his own wrist.
“if you need to do that, do it to me instead.” sakura whispered, and your heart dropped in your chest. what was he saying? you couldn’t hurt sakura that way!
“but I c-couldn’t hurt you—” you started with a stutter, only for sakura to stop you by tightening his fingers ever so slightly around your wrist. that emotion in his eyes deepened even further, and his voice shook when he murmured,
“then you understand why I can’t watch you do it to yourself.”
your heart skipped a beat. ah, that’s what that emotion was. deep, unearthed concern, born from feelings so intense that they could barely be contained. sakura couldn’t stand to watch you hurt yourself, because simply watching you do it had the same effect as you digging your nails into his very heart.
“I won’t do it anymore.” you promised in a whisper, rocked to your own core by how sincere you were about the sentiment. you didn’t need to use pain as an anchor anymore — because you had sakura, and he was the strongest anchor you could ever ask for.
“suo is dating her? but why?”
“I don’t know — she’s just so… plain, isn’t she?”
“I bet he lost a bet or something!”
their whispers echoed in your brain even long after they’d been uttered, slithering into the cracks of your subconscious and nesting there, until, at some point, you had begun to believe them.
why would suo choose you? out of everyone he could have, why would he choose the plainest girl in the town? you didn’t have any outstanding features, and your body was just on the low end of average — and suo was handsome, charming, talented and strong.
you used to believe that you had a place next to him, but now… now you weren’t so sure.
“you seem rather distracted, love; is something on your mind?” suo’s voice was like a soothing balm to your nerves, warm and familiar — but it struck a chord of pain in your chest, too, because it was just another reminder of how out of your league he was.
you swallowed thickly, those words once again bouncing around your skull. plain, average, untalented, dumb…
“suo, do you regret dating me?” you asked, choked up. you weren’t sure why you decided to phrase it that way; it just seemed to make the most sense that way.
suo fell silent. you didn’t dare raise your eyes to meet his — you couldn’t bare to see what may be within them. salty tears stung in your eyes, but you refused to let them fall; once you’d heard suo’s answer, you’d consider doing so. but until then, you would keep them contained.
there was the softest shuffle of movement, and in the next instant, you were letting out a small yelp as a body plopped down on the tatami mat behind you, and strong arms snaked around your waist.
the strong scent of patchouli invaded your nose and soft threads tickled your collarbone when suo hooked his head over your shoulder. suo was warm, enveloping your entire body from behind and filling you with a sense of safety.
“the only thing I regret,” suo started softly, his voice deep and reverent. “is not meeting you sooner.”
and suo’s voice was raw with such sincere emotion that the few words he’d uttered held more impact on your heart than a million reassurances.
your tears fell in unbidden rivulets from your eyes, but they were weighed down by pure happiness.
“… I swear, one of these days I really am going to back kick him into a different dimension…”
you wanted to pay attention to what your boyfriend was saying; really, you did. but your mind was so occupied by other thoughts — or, more accurately, occupied with keeping out other thoughts.
the urges had been more frequent, lately. it wasn’t as though anything was going wrong in your life; your grades were spectacular, you were surrounded by warm friends, and you were dating one of the best people on earth — yet, those thoughts and those feelings were still creeping in.
that drawer you had closed so long ago resonated with enticing whispers, the tiny objects located within beckoning you to pick them up once more.
come back to us… we’re your true friends. don’t you remember how much we helped you? how free you felt with us?
you shivered. even when you weren’t in your room, even when you couldn’t see the door of that drawer, you could still hear them.
“…babe? are you okay?” you blinked back to reality at the sound of hiragi’s voice calling out to you — it was then that you’d realized you had stopped in your tracks, and hiragi was standing in front of you, one large hand wrapped around your wrist and face painted with an expression of worry. how long had he been calling out to you?
“I-I’m sorry, what were you saying, hiragi?” you asked, almost robotically. those whispers had shirked into the shadows of your mind, but you could still hear them hissing at you.
hiragi studied you for a long moment, his eyes shaded with something you couldn’t put your finger on.
“the urges have come back, haven’t they?” hiragi asked suddenly. his voice held no judgement, anger, or sadness, and his eyes remained fixed in yours while he stroked the skin of your held wrist with his thumb. the scars, you realized belatedly. you swallowed thickly before nodding, tears gathering in your eyes.
you wished you could say no — you wished you could tell hiragi that you’d completely forgotten about the blades in your drawer; or better yet, that you’d thrown them in the trash rather than stowing them away out of sight.
but you couldn’t.
hiragi sighed softly and glanced down at your hand. after a moment, he slid his hand from your wrist to your hand, and with gentle fingers, he pried it open until it was facing palm up. he kept it in his grip as he used his free hand to remove his necklace from his neck.
he placed the jewelry into your palm, the metal warm from the heat of his chest. your eyes widened. he never took that off.
when hiragi was sure you had a firm hold on the necklace, he dropped your hand and brought both of his up to cradle your face. he leaned in and pressed his lips to your forehead in a sweet, chaste kiss.
“when those urges come, grab onto that necklace. use it as a reminder that I love you, and even when I’m not there, I’m still with you.”
hiragi’s breath was warm against your forehead, and you could feel the slide of his lips across the skin as he spoke. the depth of his words wrapped around you like the softest, comfiest blanket, and as hiragi gathered you into his arms to hold you tight, you realized that the whispers were silent.
you’d been with togame for a couple of months now — and you couldn’t be happier. he was an unbelievable package; sweet and loving, tall, romantic, considerate, and attractive to an extent that was almost unfair. but best of all, he let the relationship unfold at your pace.
there was no rush from him; whether it was kissing or sharing deep secrets, he let you do it on your own time. it was a monumental relief, especially in the physical aspect.
because you were hiding something from togame — something you didn’t know if you’d ever be able to show him.
your scars.
buried deep into your wrists, straight and jagged, crisscrossing and bumping — they were ugly, mars against the smooth expanse of the rest of your arm.
you had long since put down the knife. It had been over a year since you last cut, and as of late, you were no longer struggling with the urges of relapse. you had togame to thank for that.
it made you feel horrible. togame never hid anything from you — he’d even told you about the cruel things he’d done, about how he used to treat people. how much he’d hated himself then. he offered himself up as an open book for you to read any time you pleased.
and yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to show him. you couldn’t bear the thought of him knowing who you used to be, what you used to do. you were terrified of his reaction, terrified that it would make him treat you differently.
terrified that he would love you differently.
you didn’t want togame’s view of you to change; even if it meant hiding something so big from him. it was selfish and incredibly unfair, you knew this. but you were too weak, too scared. you didn’t want to lose togame.
you didn’t want togame to be grossed out by you.
but, as they say, things that are hidden in the dark must always come to the light, and they’ll do so in some way or another.
maybe it was just karmic retribution that it turned out this way; or maybe it was your own raging hormones, the ones that beckoned you to shed your long-sleeved shirt to feel togame’s skin against your own.
whatever it was, it was too late to assign blame — because your shirt was off, and togame had seen; his emerald eyes were glued to your left wrist, to the scars that littered the skin.
you held your breath while your heart shuddered in your chest. you were unable to read togame’s expression — at this point, you weren’t sure if it was because there wasn’t any emotion behind his expression or because your own mortification was blinding you.
for a moment, togame was simply silent. then, his eyes slid from your wrist and back to your face, but he didn’t say anything. instead, he leaned back down and recaptured your lips in a kiss. the heat he’d had before hadn’t faded in the least, but you were so shocked and confused that you couldn’t respond.
there were many thoughts racing through your mind, but plucking a single one out to focus on was near impossible. why wasn’t togame reacting to them? did he not care?
“they don’t change a thing,” togame suddenly murmured against your lips, sending your train of thought to a screeching halt. “they don’t change the way I feel about you. they don’t change the way I see you. you’re still the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”
you couldn’t understand why, but togame’s words brought tears to your eyes. they were fat and salty, sliding from the corners of your eyes and soaking straight into the freshly clean sheets. your heart felt like it was aching — but it was the ache that came from fullness, from emotion so strong that it threatened to completely shatter its container.
unadulterated love and acceptance. that’s what these warm, intense feelings were. he loved and accepted you, scars and all; and togame kissed and soothed that sentiment straight into your body, heart and soul — until there was no other thing you could do except feel it.
#wind breaker#wind breaker x reader#windbreaker#windbreaker x reader#jo togame x reader#hajime umemiya x reader#haruka sakura x reader#hayato suo x reader#hiragi toma x reader
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Forever Only
SUMMARY | Jaehyun comes home to find you getting off on his bed.
PAIRING | Jaehyun/Reader
GENRE | smut with no plot, protected sex (wrap it up everyone!), oral sex, masturbation, sex toy (vibrator), general perversion
RATING | Mature
LENGTH | 4,034 words
AUTHOR’S NOTE | Sorry about the lack of stories/fics. Feb so far has been busy for me. But here is a Jaehyun birthday story/fic to satisfy Valentine’s Day. Happy Love Day to all my couples and single people out there!
I'll also be writing the other Feb. birthday members soon. Some of them will be late but better than never, right?
This was originally written for another member but I changed it. So to whoever read it/liked it before, sorry about taking it down. Someone wasn’t too happy about my original choice of member.
“I'm home!" Jaehyun called out as he stepped into his apartment, which was decorated in rich, warm colors and tastefully done furniture. It was awfully quiet inside though. He could hear the TV in the living room but no voices. "Where is everyone?"
Jaehyun walked around the apartment to look for the other members. As he opened each bedroom door, he was met with no members. Did they all have schedules or something? Shaking his head, he headed towards his room, only to notice that his door was wide open.
And someone was writhing on his bed, moaning loudly.
Jaehyun leaned against his doorframe, a soft smile of amusement on his face as he watched the cute sight before him. The woman on his bed had her eyes closed, head thrown back against the pillows, her cheeks flushed red from whatever it was she was doing. And she wasn't wearing any clothes.
A tight smile appeared on the man's lips as he finally understood what was happening.
The girl made an odd noise in the back of her throat, mumbling Jaehyun's name, her fingers holding something tightly. His eyes narrowed slightly when he realized what she was holding. A vibrator. One she was now pressing between her legs, making sounds that were becoming more guttural by the second.
"Come on, come for me." Her voice was low and husky, laced with lust and heat. "Fuck, Jaehyun."
Jaehyun couldn't help but watch her. Who knew that Johnny’s little sister thought of him that way? Who knew that he'd even inspire such thoughts? He honestly didn't know if he should feel flattered or creeped out right now. But there was one thing that was very clear: The girl was insanely hot, and seeing her like this was making his dick throb. God, did she know how sexy she looked?
He watched as you plunged the vibrator inside yourself, making that moaning sound again. You pulled it out for a few seconds before plunging it back in. Then another, and another. Slowly at first, but building up to faster movements. You were obviously close. Very close. Jaehyun just had to make sure you got off.
You went still for a few moments after climaxing, catching your breath as your muscles contracted around the vibrator and sent waves of pleasure throughout your body.
"So that's what you think of me, huh?" Jaehyun finally spoke, unable to keep silent anymore.
"Jaehyun!" You opened your eyes, shock on your face as you grabbed one of the covers to cover yourself. "When did you get home? Did you see everything? Oh my god, I'm so embarrassed."
"Why are you covering yourself up? Don't be embarrassed." Jaehyun sat down next to you, running his hand through your hair gently. "Y/N, is this how you really think of me? Like this?"
You peered at him through your fingers, your breathing still heavy and irregular. Your blush gave you away, your cheeks flaming red. You tried not to give into his charm, but deep down, you liked the way he talked to you. You always had, even if you'd never admit it aloud.
"You saw nothing, Jaehyun. Nothing." You muttered as you tried to reach for your clothes that were on the ground. "If you tell my brother anything, I will punch you in your sleep."
"You would never punch me. Not if you feel this way towards me." Jaehyun laughed and scooped up your clothes, handing them over to you. Jaehyun reached out to grab your chin, tilting your head upwards to look at him properly. You held your breath, anticipation coursing through your veins.
"How do you feel towards me?" You asked, swinging your legs as you stood up so that you can put your clothes on.
"Oh, I don't know…" Jaehyun trailed off.
"Is it… bad?" You bit your lip, not wanting to let on just yet. You needed to gauge where he was at before letting him know just how much you felt for him.
"No." Jaehyun smiled and placed his hands on either side of you, bringing your body closer to his. "It's a good feeling."
"Oh?" You couldn't help but smile back at him, relieved. "That makes two of us then."
There was a moment of silence between the two of you before you decided to change the subject.
"Well… I think my brother and the others might be home soon." You coughed. "I wanted to surprise everyone but when I got here, no one was here but Johnny. He told me to wait while he stepped out to do something. So I waited for him and he ended up taking forever."
"So then you wandered around the place and into my bedroom?" Jaehyun asked, eyebrows raised in amusement.
"I guess you could say that." You laughed nervously. "I'm still so embarrassed that you caught me getting off on your bed... like this..."
"It's okay, Y/N." Jaehyun said, a smile on his lips. "You were having fun, right? Well you seemed to be enjoying yourself too. At least judging by those moans you were making."
Your cheeks burned even more than before as you nodded. Just because he didn't say it didn't mean he hadn't seen it. There was no denying what he'd just witnessed.
"Why don't we go to the kitchen? I bet you're hungry after that activity." Jaehyun suggested.
"Good idea." You agreed. "My brother probably has some snacks or something ready."
As the two of you walked to the kitchen, Jaehyun kept glancing at you every once in a while. You could tell he was waiting for you to say something. But you were reluctant. Maybe you should just drop the bomb. After all, he did just see you getting off on his bed, thinking about him.
You followed him into the kitchen and plopped down on a chair, making yourself comfortable. Jaehyun handed you a glass filled with water and sat down across from you.
"What's wrong?" Jaehyun asked as he stared at you.
"I..." You sighed heavily. "This isn't easy for me, Jaehyun."
"Tell me." Jaehyun said, leaning forward in his seat. "Please, tell me why you're so hesitant to tell me."
"Because I don't know how you'll react to it." You answered quietly.
"Then maybe you shouldn't tell me." Jaehyun replied evenly.
Your brows furrowed in confusion. Wasn't he supposed to be encouraging you to tell him? This whole situation was starting to make less sense the longer you talked about it. "Wait, how am I supposed to know how you'll react to this if I don't say anything?!"
"Trust me." Jaehyun grinned, reaching out to take your hand. "Everything will work out fine. I promise."
Just as you were about to respond to his reassuring words, Johnny opened the door and stared at yours and Jaehyun's hands. He stepped into the kitchen, the other members trailing behind. Johnny nodded at your hands before looking at you. "So did you finally confess your feelings?"
You looked at your brother before throwing a napkin at him. "You knew all along?! Is that why you left me here all this time since you knew Jaehyun was coming home?"
Johnny let out a little laugh. "I was just trying to help you out. Did it work? Have you confessed yet?"
"Not yet." You groaned. "And don't ask me about this again until after dinner! Okay?"
"Okay, I'll behave." Johnny pouted and turned to Jaehyun. "I'll leave you two alone now."
You watched as Johnny ushered the other members towards the living room, Haechan trying to stay behind so that he could eavesdrop on his hyung’s conversation with you. Once he was gone, Jaehyun looked back at you and flashed you a small smile.
You bit your bottom lip. "Yeah… I guess Johnny ruined it. Jaehyun, I like you. A lot." You took a deep breath, anxiety eating away at you as you admitted these things out loud.
"I know that." Jaehyun's expression changed instantly, his smile growing wider. He leaned close to you, his lips right by your ear so that the others wouldn't hear. "Otherwise I wouldn't have caught you in my bedroom. Would I?"
His voice dropped lower, a devilish gleam appearing in his dark brown eyes. "Do you want to kiss me, Y/N?"
Jaehyun moved his lips towards yours. They were moving slowly, so slowly. You could barely move your own lips at all. Every part of you wanted to touch him, run your fingers through his thick black hair, press your body against his. But you couldn't do any of those things because of Johnny. Or the other members who were undoubtedly listening in.
You instead entwined your fingers with his, gripping his hand tightly as you placed your other hand on top of his. Neither of you made any move to break apart, continuing to stare into each other's eyes. You couldn't believe how easily Jaehyun controlled you. How attracted you were to him.
Jaehyun's lips were just a hair breath away from yours before you heard a cough interrupting you both. Your heart raced as you snapped your head towards the source of the interruption. It was Johnny, standing in front of the open refrigerator, staring at the contents inside.
You rolled your eyes and threw a piece of bread at your brother, who easily dodged it. "Shut up, Johnny."
The others laughed as Johnny snatched a sandwich and began to eat it, crumbs falling onto the floor.
"So...uhm...did I interrupt something?" Johnny asked. "I heard some moaning earlier but I didn't know if it was yours or mine because this sandwich is delicious."
You shot a death glare at your brother, who only continued to laugh at your angry expression. Jaehyun shook his head, clearly amused at your behavior.
"You're so annoying." You huffed, sticking your tongue out at him. Johnny laughed before leaving the kitchen. You slumped in your seat and buried your face in your hands.
Jaehyun laughed as he placed his hand on your shoulder. "Are you alright?"
"Maybe I shouldn't have done that." You whispered, embarrassment evident in your voice.
"You wanted to tell me, right?" Jaehyun asked, smiling. "And besides, I like you too, Y/N. Now come on, we've got company."
You got up from your seat and followed Jaehyun out of the kitchen. The other members were still in the living room, discussing something about their upcoming music video. Jaehyun sat down on the couch, patting the spot beside him. You quickly obliged, sitting down beside him and intertwining your fingers together.
"So the lovely couple has decided to grace us with their presence." Taeyong commented, cracking a cheesy grin. "You two are finally a couple, right?"
Jaehyun pulled you closer to him, placing a soft kiss on your forehead. "Yeah, you could say that."
Everyone erupted into laughter and clapped at the same time.
"You guys are ridiculous." You grumbled, slapping at Jaehyun's arm.
“Hey, just in time for the festivities!” Jungwoo grinned. “Guess you’re not spending your birthday and Valentine’s Day alone now, huh Jaehyun-hyung?”
"We're just happy for you, Y/N." Doyoung said, looking at Johnny. "Your brother was getting fed up with you and your puppy eyes whenever you looked at Jaehyun. We're glad you finally made your move."
Jaehyun nudged you playfully. "Don't worry about your brother. If anyone would tell you how they feel, it'd be him."
Mark sighed. "I really thought Johnny was going to burst a blood vessel from rolling his eyes at you so many times."
You couldn't help but giggle as everyone shared their opinions about you and Jaehyun.
After talking for a few minutes, Jaehyun stood up and stretched his arms above his head. "Hey, guys, I'm gonna go use the bathroom. I'll be back."
You all watched as Jaehyun closed the bathroom door behind him. You could feel eyes burning into your back and when you turned to look at them, they all spoke at once.
"If you guys say something stupid, I will punch you in your sleep." You warned, poking their chests with your finger.
They only laughed harder at your threatening statement.
"So does he know that you think of him when you―" Mark stopped mid-sentence when he noticed the look on your face. "Never mind, forget I said anything."
"Oh?" Taeil muttered as he looked between the two of you. "It must be something spicy if you gave Mark that look. Do you guys wanna share?"
"No! It's nothing!" You exclaimed, shaking your head furiously.
Yuta laughed, wiggling his eyebrows. "It's something sexy, huh? Did you get off thinking of Jaehyun?"
Mark started laughing hysterically as Johnny plugged his ears. "Yo, I don't want to hear of my sister's sexual activities!"
You glared at Yuta, throwing a pillow at him. "You guys are so annoying! Can you please not talk about this stuff anymore?"
"That's why we love you, Y/N." Yuta said, pointing at himself and scratching his chest suggestively. "Sexy."
"Shut up." You mumbled, hiding your face in your hands. You were glad they weren't home when you were masturbating. The images would have been way too humiliating to explain to them. It was bad enough that Jaehyun, the object of your affection, had witnessed it first hand.
"Ohhhh, Y/N," Haechan chuckled. "Didn't know you were like that. Do you have sex dreams about him too?"
You covered your ears. "I'm not listening to any of you! Leave me alone!"
"Aw, come on, Y/N." Taeyong cooed, placing his arm around your shoulders. "There's nothing to be ashamed of."
You punched Taeyong’s arm, making him groan in shock. Taeil let out a laugh. "Geez, Y/N, we're only joking. You can tell us. I bet we've all had those kinds of fantasies at least once."
A blush rose to your cheeks as you tried to come up with an excuse to get away from everyone. But there was no way you were admitting this to them. You glanced over your shoulder, sighing in relief when you saw Jaehyun coming back to the living room.
He smiled widely when he saw you. "Did you miss me?"
You frowned at him, before tugging on his sleeve. He leaned down so that you could whisper in his ear. "Jaehyun, can we go back to my place?"
Jaehyun looked at you with wide eyes. "Are you sure? I don't want Johnny―"
"My brother can go screw himself, for all I care." You scoffed, Johnny and the others laughing hysterically.
Yuta swung an arm around Jaehyun's shoulder. "Don't come back home tonight. Just spend the night with her."
Jaehyun's cheeks grew pink and he shrugged off Yuta’s hold. He looked at you. "You sure?"
You nodded before standing on your toes to whisper in his ears. "We can pick up where I left off in your bedroom."
Jaehyun gulped audibly, shooting you a worried glance. You giggled before grabbing his hand and dragging him towards the hallway and yelled out your goodbyes to the others.
By the time you reached your place, you had forgotten about everything else that happened earlier that day. There was only one thing on your mind; how badly you wanted to see Jaehyun naked.
You unlocked the door to your apartment, Jaehyun following closely behind you. You kicked your shoes off as soon as you entered the main area, turning towards Jaehyun to wrap your arms around his waist.
"Y/N..." Jaehyun said softly as you pressed yourself up against him. His eyes fluttered shut as you traced his neckline with your tongue. You nibbled at his skin, tracing your tongue across his collarbone before gently kissing the hollow of his throat. Jaehyun shivered slightly as you lightly licked the edge of his ear.
"Do you want me to make you feel good?" You asked, running your hands along his body. "Make you forget about everything else except me?"
"Yes..." Jaehyun replied, leaning forward to nip at your lower lip. You pulled away from him and yanked his shirt off, exposing his smooth skin underneath. You pushed him down onto the couch and straddled his lap, grinding against his hard cock.
"What should I do with you, Y/N?" Jaehyun breathed, placing his hands on your hips.
"Anything you want." You answered, kissing his jawline. You kissed your way down his neck, sucking on his earlobe and sending shivers throughout his body.
Jaehyun moaned in response, gripping your ass tightly.
You let out a frustrated cry as Jaehyun pushed your dress up, revealing your lace panties. Jaehyun sucked in a sharp breath, dropping his hands onto your waist to grip your sides. He ran his thumb along your panties, enjoying the slight friction created by your clothing.
"Tell me what you want, Y/N." Jaehyun commanded, pinching the elastic band of your underwear.
"Touch me." You breathed. "Please touch me."
Jaehyun slowly peeled your panties down, sliding them off your legs and tossing them aside. He swallowed loudly, eyeing your pussy with desire. "So pretty."
You nodded eagerly, wrapping your arms around his neck. "More."
"You have no idea how much I want you right now." Jaehyun confessed, lifting you off his lap. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he walked towards the bedroom. He laid you down on the bed, leaning down to run his tongue along your neck. "But I don't want to rush things, Y/N."
You pulled his hair, making him yelp. "Hurry and get rid of your clothes, Jaehyun. Take off mines too."
"Okay..." Jaehyun agreed, kissing his way down your chest. As he made his way down, his fingers expertly removed your clothes until you were completely naked. You whimpered as he traced his fingers along your inner thighs, admiring the view in front of you.
"How long has it been since someone did this to you?" Jaehyun asked, tracing his tongue up your stomach. "Too long, isn't it?"
"Mmhmm." You murmured, closing your eyes. "Please... Jaehyun..."
"Hmm?"
"Kiss me." You begged, raising your knees towards his face.
Jaehyun complied without hesitation, spreading your legs apart and licking your swollen clit. You gasped, raising your hips towards his mouth. Your body tensed, moaning in pleasure. You felt a warm liquid spread between your legs as Jaehyun teased you with his tongue.
"Fuck, this feels better than a vibrator. This is amazing." You panted, panting heavily as Jaehyun kissed his way up your body. When he reached your lips, he buried his face in your mouth, gently biting at your bottom lip.
His tongue darted inside your mouth, causing you to moan deeply as you wrapped your arms around his neck. You broke the kiss to speak, only to gasp again when he began sucking on your nipples.
"Jaehyun... oh god... it feels so good..."
Jaehyun growled against your breast, pulling on your nipple. "Keep saying that, Y/N, and I won't stop."
You moaned in pleasure as he sucked your other nipple, releasing another flood of juices between your legs.
When you opened your eyes, you found Jaehyun smiling down at you. His pupils were dilated and you knew exactly what he wanted from you. You grabbed a condom from the drawer next to your bed and slid it on. When you pushed Jaehyun down on his back, you crawled on top of him.
"Don't tease me, Y/N." Jaehyun groaned, grabbing both of your asscheeks. "Give me what I want."
You grinned down at him, lowering yourself onto his hard cock. You gasped as you took him deep inside of you, feeling every inch of him inside of you. Jaehyun bit his lip as you ground against his dick, meeting each thrust with your own.
"Y/N..." Jaehyun panted, cupping your breasts roughly. "This feels incredible."
You moaned, burying your face in his neck as you rode him. His hands quickly went to your hips, guiding you through your movements. Your breathing was labored and your heart raced as you pushed yourself up and down, taking Jaehyun deeper and deeper with each stroke.
The pressure inside of you built up and you bit down on your lip to keep from screaming out. Your nails dug into Jaehyun's chest, the strength behind each movement increasing. You couldn't help but smile when you felt his hands tightened around your waist. You could feel the tension building up within him, feeling like you were pushing him over the edge.
As soon as you thought you were going to lose control, Jaehyun flipped you onto your back. He hovered above you, moving one of your legs to wrap around his waist while he entered you once more.
"Shit..." Jaehyun cursed, slamming his hips down into yours. Your legs tightened around his waist and he growled in frustration.
Your head fell back as you cried out in pleasure. His free hand clutched your breast, squeezing gently. Your other hand rested on his cheek, drawing his attention to you.
Jaehyun's eyes were locked onto yours as he moved inside of you. He thrust in and out of you harshly, the force of his movements almost causing you to slip from his grasp. His lips parted in ecstasy as he stared at you, his eyes filling with lust.
"I'm gonna come, Y/N." Jaehyun muttered, looking down at you with pleading eyes.
You wrapped your arms around his neck and arched your back, meeting his thrusts with your own. Your muscles clenched as Jaehyun hit the sweet spot inside of you. He released his tight grip on your breast and moved his hand to your face, pressing his forehead against yours.
You wrapped your legs around his waist tighter as you felt the first waves of pleasure course through your body. A moment later, he joined you in orgasmic bliss, shooting his load into the condom.
After a few moments of catching your breaths, Jaehyun collapsed on you before rolling off you, feeling both exhausted and satisfied. Jaehyun brought his lips to yours and you returned the gesture, sharing a passionate kiss.
"Wow." You sighed happily, resting your head on his chest.
"Yeah..." Jaehyun chuckled, stroking your back. "That was intense."
"Where'd you learn to fuck like that? From watching porn?" You asked, wiping your sweat soaked brow. You let out a laugh when he looked away. "No need to be embarrassed, Jaehyun. We're both adults here."
Jaehyun raised an eyebrow, smirking at you. "Uh huh."
"If I didn't know any better, I would say that we are meant to be together." You continued.
"Uh huh." Jaehyun repeated, fingers sliding along your hips. "I watch porn and you masturbate in my bed thinking about me. It's destiny."
You smacked his arm playfully. "Shut up."
Jaehyun let out a laugh, pulling you close for another kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck, savoring the feeling of being in his embrace.
"Now let's get dressed and go out to dinner." You suggested. "If you tell my brother and the other guys about what we did, I will smother you in your sleep."
"I wouldn't mind being smothered by your tits." Jaehyun said, teasingly.
"Stop trying to seduce me!" You giggled, bringing his lips to yours. "By the way, happy birthday Jaehyun. And thank you for letting me spend it with you."
Jaehyun smiled, kissing you tenderly. "Thank you for spending it with me. I hope you didn't have any other plans today since it's also Valentine's Day."
"Nope. Nothing at all." You admitted, pulling away from him to look into his eyes. "Will you believe me if I secretly, kinda wanted you to be mines for tonight?"
"Why?" Jaehyun asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Because I really, really like you. And there was no one I wanted to spend Valentine's Day and a birthday with more than you." You whispered, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his lips. "Happy Birthday, Jaehyun."
"And Happy Valentine's Day, Y/N." Jaehyun whispered back. "Can you be my forever only? Because I really, really like you too."
"... Yes." You breathed, looking into his dreamy eyes. "I can be yours forever."
#nct#nct stories#nct 127#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct smut#nct jaehyun#jaehyun#jung jaehyun#jaehyun smut#jaehyun x reader
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Can I request a smut prompt where Liu Kang almost loses you to Shang Tsung, but after he retrieves you back, he’s furious and upset with himself, but you knew just how to calm him down?
Also congrats on 200 followers!!! You definitely deserve it, your writing is amazing 🩷🩷🩷🩷
“MY LOVER, MY LIGHT” LIU KANG X FEM!READER
A/N : Thank you! Hope you like it!
WARNINGS : MINORS DONT INTERACT. praise kink, p in v, m receiving, f receiving, fingering, temperature play, some stuff I probably forgot
MASTERLIST
Shang Tsung almost took your soul. Lucky for you, Liu Kang, your husband, was there to put a stop to it. Even though it was already over, Liu Kang was beating himself up about it.
He should’ve stopped it sooner. He should have never put you in harms way to begin with. In his mind- this was all his fault.
Liu Kang was getting ready for bed. He had his boxers on and was completely shirtless. He was cleaning off his wedding ring as it was bloody from the damage he had done to Shang Tsung’s face.
You walked in the bedroom. You had your red set of underwear on with your red rope tied around you tightly. You watched as Liu Kang cleaned his ring. “Come on, baby. I made dinner. It’s your favorite.”
“I am not hungry, love.”
You tilted your head at him. You hated when he got like this. Guilt-ridden and self loathing. “You can’t starve yourself because you feel guilty. I’m fine.”
Liu Kang finished cleaning the ring. He placed it back on his finger. He did not dare to look at you. “You almost died.”
“Sorry to tell you, honey but that’s the price of being part of Earthrealm’s warriors. Stuff like that can happen.”
“Maybe I don’t want you to be part of Earthrealm’s warriors anymore.”
Your eyes had widen. You were shocked. You were one of, if not, the best Earthrealm warrior. You walked further in the room. “You don’t mean that.”
“I do.” Liu Kang finally turned to you. “(Y/N), I am immortal. You are not. I cannot have you forever. I do not want you to…to fall so soon.”
“I understand but there could be other factors. Like illness or even just everyday accidents. Am I suppose to live my life afraid?”
“Are you suppose to speed up the process of your  demise?”
The room fell silent. Liu Kang sighed at his harsh tone. He sat on the bed and rubbed his forehead to get rid of some tension. “I cannot lose you.”
You sat down next to him. You rubbed on his shoulder to comfort him. “I can’t lose you either. But if we think about all the ‘what if’s’ and the ‘what might’ then we’re gonna drive ourselves crazy. You told me yourself that we needed to focus on actions and not the outcome. It’s all that we can control.”
Liu Kang looked back at you lovingly. It was hard to tell if Liu Kang was crying because of his glowing orbs but you saw tears slipped past his cheeks. “Oh, Liu…” You kissed some of the tears away.
“I love you more than anything. More than myself. More than life itself.” He told you.
You always knew of the strong emotional hold you had on Liu Kang. Liu Kang had revealed to you that in the previous timeline, he was in love with you then and he ended up falling in love with you all over again.
That’s why he was so attached to you. He did not want to lose you again.
“I love you too, Liu.” You gave him a passionate kiss on the lips. Liu Kang immediately kissed you back, cupping your face.
The kiss meant something. The two of you had a hold on each other and you never wanted to leave.
You pulled away from him. You gave him small kisses on his neck. Liu Kang closed his eyes, loving the feeling of your lips on his body.
Liu Kang was already sitting on the edge of the bed. You got off the bed and sat on your knees on the ground. You then started to take his boxers off.
“Love-“ He started to say.
You shushed him, knowing what he was going to say. Although, Liu Kang always appreciated when you went down on him, he’d much rather just go down on you.
You kissed all over him. Liu Kang always got hard very quick when you touched him softly.
You wrapped your lips around him and started to suck on his dick lightly. Liu Kang moaned some. You continued to do this before taking all of him in your mouth and starting to go up and down on him.
Liu Kang, despite being a God, was always sensitive to touch. “(Y/N).” He moaned. When you sucked on his tip sweetly, he flung his body back on the bed in pure bliss.
More moans escaped his mouth. You knew that Liu Kang was more so the slow paced type so you always went slow with him. You rubbed on his thigh as you sucked on him.
The noises of slob each time you sucked him off turned him on even more. “You taste so good.” You said with all of him in your mouth.
Liu Kang felt himself twitch when you said that. He sat himself up on his elbows and watched you as you took care of him. “You look so beautiful.”
You moaned around him at the compliment and it made him twitch even more. It was true. You were amazing to look at.
Liu Kang bit his lip as he watched you undo your robe. The robe fell to the ground and he saw his wife in the red underwear set he had got for her.
You sucked his tip again and he rolled his eyes back in pleasure. “My love…”
You removed yourself from his dick and looked up at him. “You ready for me to ride you baby?” Liu Kang nodded eagerly and you stood up. You took your underwear off. Liu Kang scooted more to the center of the bed.
When you got on top of him, Liu Kang licked his fingers and stuck them in your pussy to see if you were wet enough from pleasing him. You weren’t.
He pumped them in and out of you slowly. You threw your head back in pleasure. Liu Kang watched you as you started to ride his fingers. He loved when you did that.
“Oh baby.” You moaned.
Liu Kang kissed your lips softly. His fingers found your clit and he rubbed it in circles, making you moan in his mouth.
Your hands tugged on his hair and he grunted in your mouth. “Please. I’m ready.”
Liu Kang made sure to feel all of you before deciding you were ready to ride him. He licked his fingers to get the juices off and leaned back.
You got into position. Liu Kang’s hands were on your hips. You slid down on him gently and you both let out a moan.
Your hands lay on his chest and you started to ride him slowly. “Oh yes. You feel so good.”
Liu Kang’s hands started to wander your body. His hands lit up with fire but he was careful not to burn you. He made sure rub all the parts you loved when he did temperature play with you.
“Oh my gods. Liu, you know that turns me on.”
Liu Kang just smiled at you. He helped you ride him up and down while his hands still produced light heat. You were starting to go at a much faster pace. Liu Kang panted slightly. “You know just how to ride me, love.”
You felt the heat die from Liu Kang’s hands which meant it was getting hard for him to concentrate. You continued moving at your fast pace while you undid your bra and threw it down on the ground.
Liu Kang watched your breasts bounce with each time you bounced. He groaned at the sight. “You look so beautiful.” He was close to his release but was holding it for you. “You’re so good to me. I don’t deserve you.”
At that, you leaned down to kiss his lips. “You deserve everything, baby.”
He moaned at your words and gripped on your hips tighter. He panted even more. The feeling of your pussy clenching on him was all too much for him. “You were made for me.
Something about Liu Kang always complimenting you turned you out. You felt love overwhelm your heart. “I love you.”
Liu Kang was always an emotional man during sex so having you tell him you loved him as you rode him turned him on. A lot.
He gently grabbed you before flipping you over so he was on top of you. Liu Kang kept the same fast but sensual pace. He gave you passionate kisses on your lips. “I love you more.”
Liu Kang’s right hand interlocked with yours as he fucked you. He gave you beautiful kisses on your neck and sucked on your sweet spots.
You should’ve been used to how loving Liu Kang was but you still weren’t. Tears welled up in your eyes as he made love to you. When Liu saw this he kissed the tears away.
You felt yourself start to become close. Your hand raked along his back. “I’m so close, Liu.”
Liu Kang kissed your lips once more before speaking. “Cum on me, love. I need you.”
With his words, you instantly came on Liu Kang. When he saw you came on him, he allowed himself to release inside of you.
When the two of you were done, he pulled out. Liu Kang saw the cum slipping out of you and he made it go back inside of you with his fingers. “I cannot lose you.” He repeated but this time with full love.
You pulled him down to your level and kissed him. “I can’t lose you, either.”
#mortal kombat#mortal kombat x reader#liu kang#mortal kombat 1#kitana#kung lao#mileena#raiden#johnny cage#mk#mk 1#liu kang x reader#mk smut
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monster x mediator headcanons . . . ↷
A/N; mghmgh lo necesito (sexual)
Pairing; "NauseAxe_404" x GN!Reader
CW; weird shit? no bro only him mutilating you / feeling unsafe (cutely) / MONSTER COCK MY FAVORITE / smooching the monster under your bed
i need him to have a long tongue, its canon in my head
before you even met, he swore you were a couple, he'll propose to you in a cringe-y way if you decide to stay in the room for more than five minutes
He will cut off your arms and legs as long as you don't escape, but don't worry, he will take good care of you and will look for other ways so you can continue writing
if you stay in the room, you can sleep in his bed, he will sleep under it (we all know he will get up while you sleep to hug you)
you can't talk to another human or monster anymore, you were supposed to be together forever, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GET CLOSE TO SOMEONE ELSE, IF THEY SEE YOU THEY WILL LOVE YOU AND HE DON'T WANT THAT
the walls of his room are full of drawings of you and him, photos too since his artistic skills cannot portray your beauty very well and to be honest, neither can the cameras but he loves to see you wherever he turns his gaze
no matter how scared or angry you look, in his eyes, you would never do anything wrong, it is impossible for his superstar to make a mistake in any way, all your writings are perfect, your voice, your body, your eyes, your skin, your teeth, your hair, everything
he's basically a dog, he can't help but gasp with excitement when he sees you, rubbing his crotch against you, drooling in your face even if you complain, he's not going to stop
"you bruise so beautifully", imperfections do not exist, he may be fucking you until he tears you but his look of love will not disappear, on the contrary, he will fall in love with your whimpers, with how you scream in such an adorable way
on the contrary, if you seem bored, he will ask you to hit him, take off his pants, cover him with bruises, all for love (cuarteto referencia)
you are still human, you need to eat, sleep, breathe. WELL FUCK YOU, you won't go anywhere even if it's just to look for food, you can sleep in his bed, you can breathe his air if you have to but don't go DON'T GO DON'T GO DON'T GO DON'T GO
to be honest, you wouldn't be able to stand his pace, he'll fuck you until you vomit, even if you're bleeding, he'll feed you his saliva and your limbs will give in sooner than you think.
but don't worry, he will continue loving your corpse
how many opportunities would you have to dress your superstar? He would take the opportunity to get adorable clothes and dress yourself with his own hands, putting slippers on your feet, cute bows in your hair, you don't need underwear, awww, look at you! such a pretty doll
he would never let you touch his axe, i'm sorry my love, but you have to respect his limits in the relationship, if you don't, do you really love him? of course he would never doubt the love you have for him! he just want understanding from you, dear
if you are willing, i also understand you, if they do give you the option to fuck a monster, you just take it but keep in mind that you will not be able to go to the hospital, that night you will know the true meaning of monster cock, it does not fit through your mouth and i highly doubt that it will fit your ass
even though he looks so desperate and willing to do unethical things, your biggest fan is a little shy. if you show him affection or interest, the red on your lips will sync perfectly with the red in his eyes. isn't that romantic?
he's smarter than you think, he probably used his ax quite a bit before you showed up at the hotel.
it is a relief that you had never covered the camera of your cell phone or computer while you masturbated, after showering, while sleeping even, and yes, he obviously hacked your electronic devices
idk man, he seems pretty acoustic to me, you and axes as special interests, unstable reactions to changes he cannot control, poor understanding of other people's body language or facial expressions, specific way to organize or have his room
"babe give me a reason not to kill those who look at you"
"you can't fuck me if you're in prison"
no es un chico malo, solo quiere ser él mismo
"everyone is so mean to me"
MAN I JUST LOVE HIM MY DELULU KING UEUEUUE
you don't have to say "I can fix him", he himself will tell you "FIX ME" (spoiler: you cant)
he looks cute when he cries, doesnt he?
♡
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I miss you, I'm sorry
Alexia Putellas x reader
This is just pretty much angst. It won't be long but I just need to write rn to get my feelings out.
Summary: Listen to the song ! But this is about Ale and reader's relationship and it's ending.
You said "forever" and I almost bought it.
"Baby you are my future" Alexia whispered to your ear as you were having a bad night. You were scared of losing Alexia and your every insecurity was brought up to your mind.
"Do you promise me that we will last forever?" You whispered back with tears in your eyes.
"Forever mi amor, forever" She whispered and kissed your lips so sweetly that you were so close to believing every single word she said.
You wanted to wallow in the false security. You wanted what you had with Ale to last forever. Of course there where bad times, times where she didn't give enough time for you because of football. She was always at practice but she promised to change, and for a while she did.
You had noticed the fact that she was pulling away, in some way distancing herself from you, you didn't have date nights as often, she wouldn't give you a goodnight kiss or even text if you weren't together. You wanted to believe that it was just the fact that she was busy with football but deep down you knew it was something else.
But how could you not believe her when she tells you she want's a future with you, she want's to buy a house and raise a family. When she tells you that you are her only girl and that she loves you more than anything.
Disagreements about your insecurities became an often times discussed topic. You knew that you were a lot to handle but so did she and still she always told you that it wasn't too much for her. That she could handle all the trauma and insecurities that you have.
"Do you love me anymore" You suddenly asked one night in bed. You were deep in your thoughts and just wanted reassurance.
"What the hell?" She asked in defense. It wasn't the answer you had hope for. All you wanted for her was to say that "I still love you, I promise". You had told Alexia time and time again that you needed reassurance and that you were a very insecure person but often questions like that only brought a fight up.
Nothing happened in the way i wanted
The date night you were looking forward to had finally came. You were exited that Alexia had finally planned a night for the just two of you. You could finally be held in her arms and be loved the way you deserve to be loved.
But when you arrived at the spot where you were supposed to meet, she wasn't there. You waited for 10 minutes, then 20 minutes and soon it was an hour. You were supposed to have a picnic at the place where your first date was. You were supposed to finally have a romantic night with your love but she didn't show up.
You didn't even bother texting her, you just went back to your apartment and cried yourself to sleep. You knew you would wake up to messages where Alexia was apologizing and probably making this sound like it wasn't that big of a deal and it was your fault somehow.
Everywhere I go leads me back to you.
Somehow Alexia was able to make you forgive her and you were soon back at her apartment. You had a sick feeling in your stomach but just wanted to ignore it.
Alexia was nervous when she came to open the door.
"I need to tell you something" Were the words that you were afraid off. "Could we maybe talk later today?"
"Can we just talk now?" You said, wanting to just get it over.
"Baby I'm so sorry but I have met someone" Were the words coming out of Ale's mouth. She continued talking but it was just all a blur to you. Those were the words you knew were coming but just didn't want to believe.
You blamed yourself for everything. You would take Alexia back in a heartbeat if she asked.
You should have been better
You should not have been so insecure
You should have been better
You should not have been too much for her to handle.
You should have been better
The text you ended up sending her later that night was simple.
I miss you, I'm sorry
#woso community#wlw post#woso fanfics#woso x reader#angst#im sad af#lowkay hate my life so i wrote this#don't expect a part two hahaha#alexia putellas marry me#alexia putellas x reader#alexia putellas
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Uh hi, this my first ever resquest, and i'm sorry if things don't make sense, english is not my first language.
Could i get tfp bot buddy who has shadow powers(like can turn into one and use them as portals), has the appearance of nightmares and is close to Ultra Magnus(dunno if is platonic, familial or romantic)?
They kinda been living as Ultra Magnus shadow since forever and help him on missions,tasks or just anything, but in one of their missions, the decepticons maneged to reallyyy hurt buddy and buddy, not wanting to die, retreated to Ultra Magnus shadow and went into stasis to heal but Ultra Magnus didn't knew that and thought that buddy had perished.
Only now on earth did buddy finally wakes up.
Could i get reactions from the team or something like that if not, that's okay :) also love your writing
Magnus was so close to having a spark attack when he saw Buddy pop out of his shadow the first time they used their powers, that's for sure.
Hope you enjoy!
Bot Buddy with shadow manipulation and being Ultra Magnus's Amica Endura
SFW, Platonic, Cybertronain reader
TFP
Buddy met Magnus through Optimus.
He introduced them to Magnus during the earlier years of the war as his Second in Command.
Magnus just thought he was getting to know another coworker.
A couple missions later, several late-night conversations and some free time later they become Amica Endura.
“You know you never did tell HOW you became Amica with Commander shoulder pads over there. Was it a bet you loss?”--Wheeljack
“No bets were lost Wheeljack. We became Amica out of our own choice and free will. Nothing else to do with it.”--Buddy
“Sure…”--Wheeljack
Buddy loves to prank Magnus with their shadow powers.
Magnus does not find this funny… but he does find it a bit endearing after a while.
Being an Outlier was rare to find in this world.
Even rarer to find after the war broke out.
So many had been the first ones targeted at the beginning of the war there were barely anymore left.
It was a risk putting Buddy in the Wrecker’s, but so far it brought greater success to the unit than any point in their formation.
“Freeze Autobot scum!”—Random Decepticon
Buddy putting their servo in the air almost mockingly.
“There’s three of you and one of me… what ever shall I do?”--Buddy
Buddy’s servos start glowing a bit.
“Have you met my Amica?”--Buddy
“Why would we—”—Random Con
SLAM!
Magnus takes out the three mechs after appearing from behind thanks to Buddy’s shadow powers.
“That was brutal!”--Buddy
Magnus fixes his blaster a bit.
“I hate when you put yourself in these situations.”--Magnus
“Its in the job description Mags.”--Buddy
“Buddy we’ve been over this.”--Magnus
“And we’ve been over this too.”--Buddy
“…”--Magnus
“…”--Buddy
“First one that takes out five Cons has to buy the other a drink.”--Buddy
“If you insist.”--Magnus
Buddy has defiantly used their powers to get Magnus to sneak up on unsuspecting troops.
Magnus is always there for Buddy when they overexert themselves and need someone to watch over their back.
One trip left Buddy badly injured.
They saw Magnus’s backside as he was trying to find them in the rubble of the exploding base.
They tried to call for him, but they could barely keep their optics open.
His shadow was the closest thing they could reach so they snuck into his shadow.
With a quick nap, their wounds would get healed in no time.
Magnus thought that Buddy had died in the explosion after coming back to the base for regrouping.
He checked all other places they set rendezvous points and in none of the places did he even find a trace of Buddy.
Magnus could see it in the optics of his Wrecker’s that the war was about to turn bloodier than it was now that Buddy was gone.
Hopefully things would get better…
Hope was the last thing they had.
Timeskip to Magnus being on Earth…
Buddy finally feels ready to get out of the shadow.
Yeah, it took a while to finally get healed, but they are sure they are ready now.
By their calculations they missed about a couple weeks in the war. Things couldn’t have changed that much.
Magnus is arguing with Wheeljack when Bulkhead sees something wrong with Magnus’s shadow.
“Hey guys, shadows aren’t supposed to do that right?”--Bulkhead
Miko looks from the perch.
“Wow! Wheeljack made Magnus so mad his shadow gained sentience!”--Miko
In a blink there is a bot laying on the floor rubbing their helm.
“Urgh! Never doing that again… hey Mags when did we get better lighting—Mags?”--Buddy
Ultra Magnus stares at Buddy with wide optics.
“By the Allspark! Buddy is that you?!”—Wheeljack
“Who’s that?”--Miko
Buddy moves their helm a bit and spots Wheeljack.
“Wheeljack? I thought you left cycles ago—Hey!”--Buddy
Bulkhead scoops Buddy from behind giving them a crushing hug.
“Bulkhead!? I thought you left to team Prime? Magnus? Magnus what’s going on?”—Buddy
“Seriously who’s that?”--Miko
Magnus remains still just staring at Buddy like a ghost.
Buddy gets out of Bulkhead’s grip stumbling a bit until they reach their Amica with a worried look on their face.
“Mags? Are you okay?”--Buddy
“I…I thought you had perished in the explosion. I looked everywhere…”--Magnus
Buddy scratches their helm a bit.
“Yeah, I got injured pretty badly back there. Your shadow was the closest thing I could reach and… well…”--Buddy
“So, this entire time you’ve been in Ultra Magnus’s shadow?”--Wheeljack
Buddy furies their optics a bit.
“You’re making this sound like I was gone for millennia. I was just gone for a couple of weeks most.”—Buddy
Magnus gives them a sad smile.
“…You never were good at your calculations Buddy.”--Magnus
Magnus puts a servo on his Amica’s shoulder.
“Mags?”--Buddy
“Mags?”--Miko
Buddy finally looks over at Miko.
“Who’s this?”--Buddy
“I’m Miko! Welcome to Earth!”--Miko
Buddy’s optics widen.
“How long was I in there!?”—Buddy
Optimus walks into the room with some of the reports.
“Ultra Magnus where—Buddy?”--Optimus
“WHY IS PRIME SO BIG!?”--Buddy
#transformers x reader#maccadam#bot buddy#tfp#tfp x reader#tfp x platonic reader#tfp ultra magnus#tfp ultra magnus x platonic reader
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Jealousy, jealousy
*Gif not mine credits to the owner*
• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Female!Reader.
• Requested: no.
• Summary: you and Jay get in an argument and don’t talk to each other, meeting again after some time at a wedding. What will happen when he sees you talking to another man?
• Warnings: angst, lots of swearing, fingering, nudity, unprotected sex (always use protection don’t be like them), semi public sex.
• Word count: 4530.
• A/N: PLEASE READ THIS ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+. I’m such a sucker for jealous Jay but I don’t know how to feel honestly, I feel like whenever I try to write it doesn’t succeed my expectations 😭 But here we are, let me know what do you think, comments, likes are reblogs are really appreciated ❤️ Love you all xx
Jay was about to lose his mind.
He was on the verge of going crazy, his patience running thin as he watched you from a distance laughing and joking with your friends, as if nothing could upset you.
He couldn't take his eyes off you even though his mind kept projecting and reminding him why you were in that situation. He couldn't take his eyes off you because you were gorgeous, the most beautiful woman his gaze had ever laid on, because you belonged to him but he couldn't even talk to you.
His blood boiled in his veins, his hands closing into fists. He hated everything and everyone in that moment and he hated you. He was hating you for the way you were acting like nothing happened, for the way you tucked your wavy hair behind your shoulders, the way you kept adjusting your dress, that dress so terribly perfect he just wanted to literally rip it off you and never let you wear it again.
He hated the way he was there, at a distance, hawking your every move, analyzing everything you did and your lips when he wanted to do nothing but get close to you, circle your hips with his arm and never let you go. He hated that he was pining for you and couldn't do anything to make up for it because you hadn't said a word to him.
You hadn't given him a single look, not even a glare, and Jay couldn't blame you because it was all his fault, because he had taken you for granted and now he was in danger of losing you forever.
Jay got back home, not realizing it was now midnight and that, once again, he had broken his promise to have dinner with you.
“Hey bab…-” he said to greet you as soon as he saw you on the sofa, a book in your hands. You closed it with more force than expected before placing it next to you.
“No, no 'baby,'”you interrupted him, your tone strangely cold and calm and Jay knew immediately that something was wrong. “We need to talk.”
He sat next to you, his heart pounding. “If it's for the dinner…”
You interrupted him again, not wanting to listen to the umpteenth excuses he would’ve made. You were tired. “I want a break, I don't know if I want to continue this relationship.”
Jay's heart stopped for an instant and a horrified expression came over his face. “W-what?”.
You stood up, your eyes on his wide and full of fear. The way you were looking at him, so coldly, so detached, Jay felt like dying. “You heard me.”
“No, no, no, you can't. W-we can't take a break, we can talk about it…” he stammered.
“No Jay, there's nothing to talk about,” you retorted. “I'll be gone for a couple of days.”
“No, like hell you're going away, I won't let you...”
“Where have you been all this time?”.
“I was working you know this, there was a case that hit us up to the neck. I'm so sorry…”
“It's the fifth time this month we've set up a date and you stand me off,” you said, feeling tears prick your eyes but forcing yourself to stay strong “I'm tired Jay.”
“No, you can't say that. Y/N I love you, you can't leave me...”
“How do you love me Jay?!” you blurted out, louder than you meant to, unable to keep your composure anymore “Is this your way of loving me? By standing me up on every date? Forgetting our anniversary? How are you loving me?!”.
“Y/N…” he mumbled your name, not knowing what to say other than 'I'm sorry' because you were so damn right.
“No Jay! I'm fucking tired! I'm tired of feeling like your second choice! I'm tired of feeling taken for granted because you think I won't have the balls to leave you since I love you too much. Great news Jay, I'm going to leave your ass because I can't take this anymore!” you almost yelled, now in a fit of anger “I don’t want to beg for affection and love from my boyfriend! Asking you to please spend some time with me! All you think about is work, work, work, always this fucking job, and when do you think of me?!”.
“I'm doing what I fucking can Y/N! I am sorry! You're right, I neglected you but you can't leave me...”
“God I hate you so fucking much right now,” you ran your hands through your hair in frustration “I hate you so much because I feel like a selfish bitch who only thinks about herself! I know you work, I know your job is very important but I'm tired! I tried to understand you, to stay silent, to meet your needs… But I'm human too Jay! I exist in the relationship too, I too have my desires, my needs and my fears fuck, it's not just you! Have you ever once asked me 'how are you' or 'how was your day’? You never fucking did! All you can say is 'sorry, sorry, sorry' expecting this will fix everything but it doesn't work like that! And I've fucking had enough, I'm tired of fighting for a relationship you don't even give a shit about!”.
You left him no room to reply because you went into the bedroom to get the suitcase you had already packed. Jay tried to stop you, tried to apologize but it was in vain, you left the apartment, never looking back.
And that was the last time he saw you before meeting you again at the wedding you were both invited to, almost two weeks later.
There was no shortage of attempts of reconciliation from Jay, all of which were rejected and after which he understood he had to respect you and give you your space.
But God, how he missed you.
“Halstead,” he heard someone call to him, looking away from you for an instant only to see Adam beside him with a glass of liquor. Jay stood in the back of the room, leaning against the wall and hands in his trousers’ pockets as he withdrew from the festivities.
“Thanks,” he replied before taking the glass and downing the liquor, which turned out to be whiskey, and looking for you in the crowd. You were still talking to a group of your friends, a glass of champagne you occasionally sipped. A veiled expression of disgust appeared on your face as you took a sip of the champagne and Jay smiled, knowing it wasn't your favorite liquor and that you were most likely just drinking it for company.
“You're ridiculous man,” Adam commented, taking a sip of his drink when he noticed the direction of Jay's gaze. “Why don't you just talk to her?”.
Jay sighed. “She doesn't want to talk to me and I don't blame her.”
He saw the way you adjusted your dress, running your hand up the skirt, smoothing it. His ravenous and hungry eyes traveled all over your body, watching the way that dress hugged you and showed off every curve of your body. It was a long ice silk mermaid gown, the thick straps of your dress dropped past your shoulders leaving them bare and a long deep slit on the right side showed off your leg. Jay was losing his mind, he was literally going crazy.
“Standing here and watching her like a hawk isn't going to fix the situation. You look like a creep.”
“I know, fuck, I know.” His fingers drummed on the glass, feeling a grip in his stomach when he saw you laughing heartily at a joke from a friend of yours, your head tilted back and your hand resting on his shoulder.
Jay began to smoke with rage and jealousy, about to break the empty glass with his own hands. Your friend placed a hand on your lower back, saying something to your ear. Jay swore he saw your gaze flicker to him and a small smirk on your lips but he was too focused and angry about that filthy hand on you to make any logical thought.
He'd always been jealous, that funny jealousy you always teased him about, but in that moment seeing that bastard so close to you, the way he was blatantly hitting on you, the way you didn't even realized it and kept laughing and joking with him, making him think he had a chance… All of this was too much, too much for Jay to bear.
He was the only one that could touch you like this, the only one that could make you laugh, get close to your ear and whisper something to you.
That’s why, when he headed towards you, with a furious and angry look on his face, Adam's attempt to stop him was in vain.
Before you knew what was happening, Jay's hand was already around your wrist and he was dragging you away from the reception room, leaving the man you were talking to standing there.
“Jay stop! I’m wearing heels, I can't run!” you exclaimed as you struggled to keep up with him, your other hand holding up your dress to avoid tripping. You walked into one of the bathrooms there and Jay wasted no time in locking it.
“What the hell are you doing?!” you asked trying to keep your voice low so no one would hear you. His breathing quickened, his chest heavy as his fingers rubbed his temples, a gesture he used to do when he was particularly frustrated.
“You’re really asking me what am I doing? What the fuck are you doing?!” he exclaimed angrily, his eyes on yours “Do I need to remind you you're not fucking single, Y/N? Or did you end our relationship without even having the courage to say it to my face?”.
“You had no right to drag me away like that Jay! My goodness!”.
He ran a hand through his hair, letting out a nervous chuckle. “I can't believe it,” he threw his hands in the air “We haven't seen each other for two weeks and this is your fucking thought!”.
“And whose fault is that for ending up in this situation, huh?!” you spit angry. He was looking at you with an angry expression on his face, his jaw set, his hair messy from fingers constantly running through it, but he was so incredibly sexy it took your breath away. And you hated yourself for these thoughts, because you were locked in a bathroom and you couldn't help but think about how damn beautiful he was, how pure sex the suit he was wearing was.
“I'm doing everything to make it up to you, Y/N! I've been coming to your house for two weeks and you won't even open the door and give me the opportunity to talk and I know it's the least I could do and you deserve the world but you think I can try to improve if you keep acting like that?!”.
“How am I acting?!”.
“You’re even asking me!” he exclaimed, taking a step towards you and waving his arms in the air. “You let that son of a bitch touch you and put his filthy hands on you! You… You laughed at his jokes, joked with him all of that in front of me!” he panted “What?!” he snapped, noticing the smirk that had appeared on your lips.
You took one step towards him, and then another until you were just inches apart. His words died in his throat as he tried to keep control. But he couldn't, not when you placed a hand on his chest, not when you looked at him with those 'fuck me' eyes, not when your scent and your proximity were intoxicating him so much it took his breath away and made it impossible for him to think of anything that wasn't you.
“Are you really that jealous, huh?” you asked in a whisper, your tone low and sensual. Your fingers caressed his chest and he squeezed his hands into two tight fists, because if they touched your body he would no longer be able to control himself. “You don't like when someone touches me? When someone whispers how good I look in this dress?”.
“Y/N,” he said in a warning tone. “God. Keep your fucking mouth shut if you know what's best for you.”
“Or what? What are you going to do to me detective Halstead? Do you want me to go back to Ben?” you whispered after you leaned into his ear. You inhaled his scent deeply, that scent you missed so much, that made you dizzy, that scent you wanted to smell on every corner of your body.
Jay grabbed your face with his hand and your heart skipped a beat, his gaze alternating between your eyes and your then slightly parted lips. “If your aim is to make me lose my goddam mind darling, you are succeeding.”
You couldn't answer, the intense green of his eyes made you waver and his grip so strong but so delicate at the same time had made every single cell of your body ignite and he knew it, he understood it by the way he you looked at him, by the way your body pressed against his.
He started taking steps, making you walk backwards, slowly, until your back touched the cold tiles of the walls.
“Did you like playing with me? Driving me crazy?” he whispered as his warm breath tickled your lips. He pressed his body against yours, your chests pressed against each other and despite the various tissues that separated you, you could feel his hard erection pressed against you and that was enough to leave you wanting to have him, to feel him.
“It's one of my favorite hobbies,” you replied and he tightened his grip around your jaw.
“Just shut up for once in your life,” he hissed through his teeth. He tilted your head to one side and with his other free hand brushed your hair behind your shoulders, exposing your neck. As his lips left a small kiss on your skin, a rush of shivers ran up your spine. “I'm so fucking mad at you right now Y/N,” he planted a series of wet kisses down your neck until he got to that point he knew would drive you crazy “Even though I miss you like air,” he licked your skin, nibbling it with his teeth while sucking it lightly with his lips. You were already a mess and the heavy sighs you exhaled while trying not to moan and half-closed eyes were proof of this. “You drive me so fucking crazy.”
Your hands closed in a fist around his jacket, trying to release all the frustration and desire you were feeling. His free hand was squeezing your hips with such force you thought he’d leave some marks but a gasp left your lips as he groped your ass. God, it was so fucking good.
“But maybe you could use a little reminder,” he nibbled your ear. In one motion he spun you around, pressing you face against the wall, his dick pressed on your ass. He leaned back to your ear as his hands traveled along your body. “Because you seem to forget you're only mine. Those,” his hand covered your breasts almost moaning at the sensation “They’re only mine,” with his fingers he unzipped the dress, making it fall ruinously to the floor and leaving you exposed to him, only panties to cover your body. He kneeled behind you, leaving a wet kiss on your ass biting and leaving a mark on it. “This is mine.”
He stood up after squeezing your ass with his fingers again, making you wet like never before. “You're so fucking beautiful,” he bit your shoulder as he circled your throat, tilting your head back and exposing your neck again which he wasted no time sucking and kissing it, leaving numerous marks. “And so fucking mine,” he whispered in your ear again “All mine.”
You could no longer form a single coherent thought, your mind too foggy as his hands touched you everywhere and leaving you wanting more.
“Do I need to remind you who can make you lose your mind without even touching you?” His fingers caressed the hem of your panties, torturing you. “Do I need to remind you who you're rubbing against now silently begging to get fucked in a fucking bathroom?”.
“Jay please,” you managed to mutter.
“No, you don't get to say please now,” he replied “Not so big anymore huh baby?”. Without warning he slipped his hand into your panties while the other covered your mouth as a moan escaped your lips. “Do I need to remind who you're so wet for now?”.
Your eyes narrowed in pleasure as you moaned against his hand, his fingers skillfully touching you and making circular motions over your swollen, throbbing clit. God, it was so intense you were afraid your knees would give out sooner or later.
“Shh, you don't want anyone to hear us don't you?” he said when despite the hand on your mouth your moans came out muffled. You reached up behind you, stroking his hard dick, earning you a grunt that reached your throbbing core. “So fucking dirty,” he breathed out with a small smirk on his lips.
Two knocks on the door made you jump and your breath stopped for an instant. Jay, on the other hand, didn't seem to be fazed and kept touching you, inserting a finger inside you and you whimpered, feeling the orgasm already getting closer and closer.
You were so afraid the door was going to open and someone would see you almost naked as Jay had his hand inside your panties, but the pleasure he was giving you was so fucking good you couldn’t care about anything or anyone beside him. It was a long, long time since he touched you and it was almost embarrassing the speed with which you were already almost at the limit.
“Shh… Do you want to come baby? Do you think you deserve it?” he whispered, noting the shadows in front of the door were gone. You nodded vehemently, but at that precise moment he stopped, removing his hand from your mouth. “Too bad. Open your mouth,” with embarrassing speed you did what he told you and the finger that was inside you until recently was now in your mouth as you sucked it and tasted yourself “Good girl.” This simple phrase almost made you faint.
Before you knew what was happening, Jay spun you back towards him and his hands were on your face, his lips pressed against yours. He kissed you until your breath was taken away as his tongue explored every corner of your mouth. It was a sloppy and hungry kiss, almost pornographic, hands in the hair, hands wandering everywhere and pulling off clothes.
“I want you so bad,” you panted as your frantic fingers unbuttoned his pants which fell along with his boxers rolling around his ankles.
“Fuck,” he moaned under his breath as your hand circled his dick and your thumb stroked his pink, throbbing tip, wet with seminal fluid. But he grabbed your wrist, pulling your hand away and you looked at him with a confused expression. “You don't get to touch me now,” he said and spun you back to the wall.
He was turning you, tossing you around, using you like a doll for only his liking and you had nothing against it, you were so excited you’d make him do whatever he wanted to you.
“Jay please, I'm so horny please… Touch me,” you literally begged, not caring how ridiculous you sounded. He placed his hands on your hips, slipping off your panties and making them fall to the floor along with your dress, leaving you completely naked at his mercy.
Jay was quivering, he couldn't take it anymore, and as you continued to press your ass against his rock hard dick. “Such a needy little whore, do you want me to fuck you in here? In this bathroom?”.
“Yes, fuck, yes.”
He had you positioned in front of the sink and only then you realized how awful you looked, the way your cheeks were flushed, your hair messy, your lips swollen.
He was so breathtaking it almost hurt. How could be someone be so beautiful? So imperfectly perfect?
“Look at you,” he whispered returning your gaze through the mirror. His hands began to touch your breasts as his fingers pinched your hard nipples, “Look how gorgeous you are,” he bit your shoulder. Without warning he penetrated you from behind, making both of you let out a moan you were sure the whole restaurant had heard.
“Shh,” he breathed into your ear “Or I'll stop. Fuck, baby you feel so fucking good.”
He started moving in and, damn it, he was going so hard, you knew when you were done you weren't going to be able to walk straight. The bathroom reverberated with the sounds of your skins touching each other after every thrust, of your muffled moans, sighs.
His hand went around your throat, forcing you to tilt your head back again as his lips bit, sucked and his tongue licked your skin, making sure to leave as many marks as possible.
He knew he was acting like an animal, like a caveman but he didn't fucking care. He wanted everyone to know you were his only, that it was only him that made you bend over a sink like that making you drip on his dick while he fucked you in a filthy bathroom.
You bit your lip trying not to moan but it was so fucking good, so intense, so carnal, you couldn't help yourself. Jay returned his eyes to you through the mirror and as his dick slipped in and out of you with ease, the vision of you being ruined like that drove him crazy.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groaned and how sexy it was to hear him moan like that in your ear. Your hands stayed on the sink, trying to find support as the force of his thrusts made you go forward.
“Oh yeah, just like that…” you moaned, louder than you ever meant to and he tightened his fingers lightly around your throat. “Shut up or I'll stop, do you understand me?”.
You nodded. “Holy shit Jay,” you muttered, biting your lip again. You felt out of breath, every muscle in your body was jelly and you thought you couldn't make it.
The way he was fucking you, God, he was angry, it was determined, strong and so intense it almost hurt. But you wanted it all, you wanted his dick inside you and fucking you so hard he made all your thoughts go away, you wanted him to come inside you, you wanted to feel him so deeply inside you that you couldn't sit still for the next days, you wanted him to mark you, his lips and his calloused hands all over your body. You were his. Soul and body, hopelessly, irrevocably and forever his.
The hand that was around your throat ended up around your hair, which he pulled back into a messy ponytail, pulling it. “All mine,” he moaned, now on the verge of bursting as he felt his orgasm building up “All fucking mine.”
Your fingers gripped the edge of the sink even harder, your eyes watering with tears. His thrusts were almost even stronger, his dick managed to hit that point inside you that always left you craving for more and you couldn't resist anymore. He was animalistic, passionate, possessive and god if you loved it.
“I-I can't...” you stammered. He pulled your hair making you lift your head and leaned slightly towards you, leaving a sweet kiss on your cheek, in stark contrast with the roughness he was fucking you.
“Of course you can,” he whispered letting out a moan “Oh god I’m so close baby… This pussy feels so fucking good I can’t resist anymore…”
From the way your wet pussy was clenching around his dick he knew you were close too but he was already coming. His cum poured inside you in an intense, blinding orgasm, filling you up to the last drop.
He was breathing heavily, his heart pounding and it took him a second to come back to reality and remember that you were still under him, still needing an orgasm.
“You were such a good girl,” he whispered into your ear as his fingers touched your clit, “My baby deserves to come.”
“Oh Jay…” and his name sounded like melody in his ears“Yes, yes, fuck, yes. I want to come so bad…”
His hand grabbed your face turning your head to the side and pressing his mouth to yours. It was a messy kiss, interrupted by your moans which he completely swallowed.
Your orgasm was unexpected, sudden, almost paralyzing, making your vision blurry and your head dizzy. Your knees were about to give out and it was Jay who held you up, wrapping an arm around your hips and supporting you. “My beautiful, precious girl,” he kissed your cheeks and shoulders softly “Are you okay?”.
You let out a sigh. “Oh yes, God, it was so good,” he chuckled “But don't think this fixes everything,” you continued pointing a finger at him. “I never even thought about it.”
He helped you get dressed and you both tried to regain at least a normal look but, after looking in the mirror, you realized there was no way anyone was going to not understand what had happened in that bathroom. Your neck was covered by the hickeys he left, your hair was a complete mess, your legs where just jelly.
“Come home with me,” he whispered, grabbing your face, gently stroking your cheeks with his thumbs “Please. Y/N, I need you. I… I don’t want to spend another second without you.”
You looked into his eyes for a moment, your heart beating wildly. “But we need to seriously talk. I don't want to go back to same situation, Jay.”
He shook his head before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “No, no, it won't happen again and I will do everything in my power to make you forgive me. You’re the most important thing in my life Y/N, you are and you’ll always be my number one priority and I don’t want to ever make you feel like you weren’t again. I haven't been good at proving it lately but I swear, I love you to death baby and there's nothing I wouldn’t do for you, just…” he paused for a second, looking at you so intensely you almost wanted to cry “Just let me prove it to you.”
You nodded slightly, a small smile on your lips that quickly disappeared when someone started knocking on the door.
Well, this was about to get very embarrassing.
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hello!! if you can and want, could you write some angst with steve x fem!reader in which reader feels insecure - in a way that she thinks she's annoying because she talks too much and sometimes too loud, and one day, steve has the party over for a movie night and one of the kids mention that she talks too much and she's too loud while steve goes into the kitchen for something (or to the bathroom, whatever). so from that moment on she tries to speak as little as possible until steve brings it up to her one day and comforts her about it.
i'm sorry if it's too specific, if you can't do it, it's alright! your writings are some of my favourites on tumblr!!! 🌼💗
you and steve never really had any major problems, little fights every now and then but it wasn’t big. you still loved each other, you completed each other
but sometimes, just sometimes, you’d wonder if you really did complete steve. moments like this would always come up, like you’d be play fighting with steve and you’d say “i’m gonna catch you!” a bit too loud
when that would happen, you’d quiet down, you’d be the same, just calmer and more quiet. steve never really notice it until one day, where it became way too clear for him not to.
you were with the party, everyone was wrapped around blankets, popcorn and snacks in hand as they watched the movie, steve was next to you, holding you close as you watched
“wait i don’t get it—how did all that happen when her boyfriend was just sleeping, he must’ve noticed, right?” you asked
“hm, don’t think so, it was outside so he couldn’t have heard it” steve explained
“ohh, yeah right” you said, steve then told you he was gonna go get more snacks from the kitchen
“that one’s my favorite” you pointed to the girl on the screen, you liked talking about the characters and movie overall
“oh my god” mike whined
“we get it, jesus” lucas said
“what the hell, guys?” dustin said
“im sorry dustin i cant take it anymore” mike said, “cant you go one minute without talking? it’s so annoying! we can barely hear the movie because of how loud you are!” mike rolled his eyes and dustin smacked him
“oh…i’m sorry” was all you said, you turned back to the movie and snuggled closer into your blanket, wishing you could hide under it forever. you wanted to disappear, to go away.
you zoned out as the scene kept replaying in your head, you knew it. you finally knew what they truly think of you, what they hate about you. and it was exactly what you hated about yourself
you felt steve sit next to you, making you snap back to reality
“got you your favorite” he smiled and gave you the bag, you slightly smiled and ate in silence
ever since that night, you barely spoke. when you’d visit steve, you’d just listen and nod when he’s speaking. only time you’d actually talk is when you had to give a verbal response.
even then, it was low and wasn’t the way you used to talk, it was worse when you were around the party, you wouldn’t utter a single sound. you thought nobody would notice, but steve did. very much.
steve was working robin’s shift, so it was just you and him, he called you earlier, asking if you could come over since he’s closing the store now, you muttered a small ‘mhm’ and went to the store, helping him close up
he was talking to you about one of the customers that came today, and how they’d taken so long to decide what movie they wanted
“can you believe it? 45 minutes just to pick ghostbusters, it’s not even that hard of a decision to make” he said as he put away the tapes, he looked to you and saw you nodding
“let’s go sit for a bit, take a little break” he said and you nodded again, he sat in front of you, holding your hand
he called your name, and you shook your head in question, “you know i love you, right?” he said and you nodded, “you know you can tell me anything, right?” and you nodded yet again
“did i do something?” he asked and you furrowed your eyebrows and shook your head, “talk to me” he said, his tone frustrated
“no” you shook your head
“then tell me what’s wrong” he asked and you stayed silent, “i know somethings wrong, please—tell me why are you acting this way?”
“what way—“
“are you serious?” he cut in, “you’ve barely said a word to me for the past few days, i know theres a reason—talk to me, please.”
you looked at him for a bit and looked down, “there’s nothing wrong, okay? just—some people finally decided be brave enough to tell me the truth”
“what truth? what people—“
“the truth is that im annoying!” you snapped, “that im annoying—and loud, and talkative. and im happy to hear it because they’re not wrong. they’re not! i should actually thank them for finally telling me what’s wrong with me.” you sighed
steve looked at you with such hurt in his eyes, “who said that?” he asked in a low voice
“why do you even care—”
“why do i even ca—are you—because it’s a lie! everything—they’re all lies! baby, who cares if you like to talk about things more than others do, who cares if you’re loud? you’re you and thats what matters, whoever said that is saying complete bullshit, and i don’t care about it. i just—“ he sighed and held your hand tighter, “i miss your voice, i miss the way you get excited about things, i miss the way you talk on and on and on, i miss you. i miss you, peach.”
a smile found its way on your face and you hugged him tight, “i love you, stevie” you said
“i love you too” he smiled, a feeling of comfort finally coming back to him, to hear you and have you in his arms again.
you two held onto each other for a bit before letting go, “now, you wanna tell me who in their right mind said that?”
#stranger things 4#stranger things x reader#steve harrington#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington angst#stranger things fluff#steve harrington x plus sized reader#steve harrington x mayfield!reader#steve harrington x original character#steve harrington x henderson!reader#steve harrington x reader angst#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x y:n#steve harrington x female!reader
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ghostin - jonathan crane x reader
this story is told with flashbacks and little fragments of the readers memories, and ugh - i think i broke my own heart writing this.
summary: jonathan just comes to visit you when you're dreaming every now and then.
word count: 3K
warnings: death, accidental suicide, grief and mourning, miscarriages, like pure angst i'm sorry but lowkey a happy ending? (also please listen to the song it just so good)
you woke up in a cold sweat, trembling with tears streaming down your face as you look over to the digital clock by your bed.
12:12 am
"another dream?" your boyfriend mumbles sleepily from beside you in the bedsheets, softly rubbing your arm in hopes you soothe you.
you felt the tears stream down your face uncontrollably again, "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to wake you up."
"don't apologize," he whispers, "i can hear you crying in your sleep. i just want to be there for you when i can."
"he came to visit me again," you say, letting out a choked sob, "i-i haven't seen him recently, but he came back."
"i know, sweetie. i know." your boyfriend says softly, now sitting up to hold you in his arms - but it's not the same.
it'll never be the same as jonathan.
four years. it had been four years since the love of your life passed away, and everyday you mourned him. you even found someone else; but it was torture for him, you knew it. of course it hurt you - but you knew it hurt your boyfriend more to hear you cry night after night, always knowing that deep down he he would always be number two to a man who you couldn't hold anymore.
for you, every tear was a rain parade from hell.
jonathan's passing destroyed you, it broke you into a million pieces and you still weren't sure if you would ever be complete again; even four years later. it was all so sudden, so unexpected.
you knew what jonathan did on the side, he wasn't a saint, but that didn't deter you away from him. if anything, it made your bond stronger - unbreakable, even if one of you wasn't here anymore.
it was only a matter of time before the crimes he committed caught up with him - but you never thought that they'd take him away from you. when you got the call from the hospital saying your fiancee had been stabbed repeatedly and unfortunately didn't make it, you were beside yourself.
for two years after his passing, you continuously wore the engagement ring jonathan had proposed to you with. the memories haunted you.
jonathan haunted you.
and about your boyfriend - he was originally a family friend that you had known since childhood, but he was there for you during the time you were grieving. hell, you were still grieving. but soon enough, there was a sense of trust there, a sense of comfort - and finally, you opened your heart up again.
but you knew it wasn't the same; you'd be lying if you said it even felt similar.
you often wondered what the point of living on was if your soulmate was forever gone, maybe love was off the table for you in this life. perhaps the afterlife was more suited to you, then you could finally be happy again, finally feel alive in a place where death lingers.
your grief washed over you like a tidal wave, hitting you where it hurt the most. your mind wandered back to life with you and jonathan - what life should’ve been like now, with the man who should’ve been laying in bed beside you.
your current boyfriend lays back down in bed, giving you a concerned look, but you wave him off and let him go back to sleep. in the meantime, you grab your phone off the nightstand and scroll to your voicemail.
you did this frequently; listening to old voicemails that jonathan had left you. it was one of the only remnants you had left of him. pressing play, you heard his voice telling you how he missed you, how he’d be home soon - you still remember that day vividly, the flashbacks playing over and over like a broken record in your mind.
"jonathan!" you squealed as he picked you up and tossed you onto the bed softly.
"i missed you so much, darling. i couldn't stop thinking about you at work today." he told you, voice dripping with pure love and admiration for you, as he looked at you adoringly.
"i missed you more, my love." you tell him softly, and he pulls you in for a long, passionate kiss.
the two of you had been spending a little more time apart recently, as jonathan had to work overtime a lot, and plus, he had his scarecrow activities consuming the rest of his time. but jonathan always made time for you - even if you assured him that it was okay, he always did.
he made you feel wanted.
needed.
"i can't believe you're going to be mrs. crane in less than a week." he whispered against your lips, and you hum in agreement. you were so very excited to finally get to marry the love of your life, the one - but that chance was ripped away from your very hands.
it wasn't fair - none if it ever was.
you felt the tears streaming down your face as you recalled the beautifully tragic memory that was now forever imprinted into your brain, and you tried your hardest to stop yourself from full on sobbing.
the tears didn't stop, they never did.
four years. four years later and it still left an empty void in your heart.
"sweetheart," your boyfriend says softly, catching your attention, "don't torture yourself - please, it kills me to see you like this."
you sigh, wiping the tears off your cheeks and placing your phone down on the bedside table. trying your hardest to deep breathe, you lay back onto your side of the bed and close your eyes. you felt your boyfriend hold you, wrapping his arms around you again - yet another reminder that jonathan wasn't here, and instead, it was someone else. you drifted off peacefully that night, and you dreamt of something you couldn't remember.
any dream that didn't have jonathan in it wasn't worth remembering, anyway.
that morning, you awoke around half past ten, and your boyfriend was already gone. you knew he had to work, and you were left alone with your thoughts and the ghost of your past which came back to haunt you, again.
you felt sick.
your doctors and therapists told you that the grief would subside after a year, maybe two, but it never did. how could it? every doctors appointment, you would just see jonathans face, reminding you of every painful emotion that his passing brought you. how you could even withstand going to therapy was beyond you, as again, it reminded you of what your late fiancee did for work.
sighing in distress, you force yourself to get up out of bed and roam around your house, but it wasn't a home for you. just a house, and nothing more.
home is where the heart is, they say - and jonathan wasn't here, and with him is where your heart was, so therefore, this was not home for you. you often tried to pretend it was, though.
grabbing the keys off your counter, you get into your car and drive to grab yourself an iced coffee from your favourite drive-thru, too exhausted to make it yourself.
when you got back to your house, it was quiet - still and empty; most parts of your life seemed to be like that.
the things you would do to hear jonathan welcoming you back home again - just one last time. you would give your life to be with him, it's not like the thought hadn't crossed your mind before.
placing the iced coffee on the kitchen counter, you felt like the house almost echoed with the memories of your past. the house you lived in was the same one that you and jonathan lived in - you couldn't bring yourself to move out. it was huge - a quiet mansion on the suburbs of scottsdale, arizona, where you and jonathan moved to after getting engaged. the two of you decided that gotham was no place to raise a family.
your family.
holding the test with shaky hands, you look down at the lines on it.
positive.
a soft knock on the bathroom door shook you out of your thoughts, and jonathans voice came from the other side.
"darling?" he asked, "are you alright? i thought i heard you crying."
"y-yeah, one sec." you call out, voice shaky. you placed the test on the bathroom counter, and open the door with trembling hands to see a worried jonathan standing on the other side.
"oh, darling," he coos softly as he noticed the tears, "what happened?"
you let out a muffled sob, and his arms come to wrap around you, holding you close. "i-i'm..."
"...you're what, honey?" he asks softly, petting your hair as he held onto you tightly.
"i'm pregnant." you finally say, and he pulls back to look at you.
"you're pregnant?" he asks quietly, not quite sure if he had heard you correctly, to which you nod, trying desperately not to cry.
"darling, that's wonderful." he whispers, tears welling in his own eyes, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze.
oh how you missed those beautiful, blue eyes.
"b-but were getting married in a month, i don't want to show to show through my dress," you say with teary eyes, "what if i have to alter the dress, what if get fat and i-"
"stop," he says softly, his voice immediately soothing you, "realistically, you probably won't even show until a few weeks after the wedding, my love. it'll all be okay, i promise."
you take in a deep breathe, remembering that jonathan was indeed right, he was a doctor after all.
was.
"god, what would i do without you?" you sigh, as he held you close once more, comforting you.
"i don't ever want to know." he whispered against your hair, placing a gentle kiss on the top of your head.
to answer your own question - this. this is what you would do without him. sleeping all day, depressed, and unable to function without feeling an immense feeling of loss.
you still remember the day that your doctor had told you that you miscarried, as a result of the stress your body was going through. that day, your soul died completely if it hadn't already when jonathan passed. there was nothing left of you anymore. you were physically there, yes, but you didn't exist.
looking back at the iced coffee, you grimaced. if you drank caffeine, that would mean that you'd stay awake, and that you couldn't waste your day away sleeping.
sighing, you dumped it down the drain of the kitchen sink.
after doing that, you dragged yourself to your bed again - getting under the covers and reaching for the pill bottle beside you. lorazepam pills sat in the prescription bottle, and you popped the usual dosage. you knew it was wrong - this was a temporary fix, at least, it was supposed to be. your doctor told you that you should never extend the usage of this medication beyond four months, but you did.
you'd been doing it for nearly a year.
yeah, you had trouble sleeping, that much was obvious, but there was a different reason as to why you were taking these pills.
no, they didn't ease your anxiety-induced insomnia that you had been suffering with for years, but they did help you sleep during the day when you wanted a break from being alive.
and when you slept, sometimes jonathan would visit you in your dreams. that's why you took them, in hopes that maybe he would show up in your sleep. dozing off, you fell into a state of deep slumber.
you dreamed vividly of him, finally. though the night before, he had visited you in your dreams, you needed more. you so desperately needed more.
you dreamed that you were in the same house as you were currently in, but you were in the kitchen again. looking around, you noticed how different it looked.
like it was alive again. like he was alive again.
"darling," his voice made you turn around, and you felt yourself start to cry, "what's wrong?"
"i just miss you so much, jonathan." you sob, running into his arms to which he happily holds you. he didn't say anything, quiet for a moment before he finally spoke back to you.
"i try to visit you in your dreams as often as i can." he whispered, and you felt yourself break. "i promise, i'm watching over you."
"i can't do this without you," you cry, "i don't know how to go on."
he stared at you silently as you looked up at him, tears running down your cheeks. god, he looked the exact same. not a single difference from the way he was four years ago.
"i can see you." he suddenly says, and you look at him with confusion.
"what?"
"soon." he softly says, smiling at you with tears in your eyes. before you could ask what he was trying to tell you, you wake up in a cold sweat again.
the room was dark now, but your boyfriend wasn't sleeping beside you. quickly glancing over to the digital clock, you read the time.
12:12 am
had you really fallen asleep for that long? it didn't feel like it.
before you could let your thoughts consume you once more, you noticed that this time, your bedroom door wasn't fully shut. both you and your boyfriend always shut it before going to bed, but it was halfway open, and the distant hallway light was turned on.
letting your eyes adjust to the darkness, you made out what appeared to be a figure standing in the doorway, watching you. yet, it didn't scare you, rather it comforted you.
"jonathan?" you whisper out loud, smiling with tears running down your face.
getting up out of bed, you walk slowly and a little hesitantly towards the figure, but before you got close enough, the door swung fully open with your boyfriend standing there, his face stricken with panic.
the apparition was seemingly gone now, and you look at your boyfriend confused.
"are you okay?" you ask softly, but he looks straight past you, and you can see the tears on his face now. it was almost like he couldn't see you in this moment. perhaps you were dreaming again?
"she was like this when i came home!" he sobbed, and you looked at him with confusion, but then what appeared to be a team of paramedics and police officers came up behind him, walking into the bedroom.
one officer had flicked the light on, and you were now worried. what was wrong?
but you glanced over to the bed, now fully visible under the light, and you saw yourself.
you saw yourself laying there on your bed, looking unnervingly peaceful, and for once, you weren't crying. you thought for sure this was just a dream, but fuck - it felt so real.
you watched quietly as nobody seemed to notice you standing in the room, and a paramedic rushed over to your side of the bed, placing two fingers by your neck his colleague placed a bunch of medical equipment beside him.
he inhaled sharply and spoke to both the team of paramedics and the police officers.
"time of death, 12:12 am."
you shook your head, not believing what you were seeing. how could this be?
were you dead?
then, the paramedic that had announced your time of death had picked up the bottle of lorazepam, handing it over to a waiting police officer.
"benzos," the officer said, "ativan overdose. seemingly accidental."
the rest was a blur. they had picked up your body - your dead body - up and placed you in the ambulance, officers following, and seemingly had transported you to the hospital, or the morgue of the hospital. you weren't entirely sure.
your boyfriend had gone with them, he looked like a mess. he was a mess, he had just come home to find his girlfriend lying dead in her bed from a suspected accidental suicide.
the world stilled for a moment as you stood in your bedroom, unsure of what to do next, but your name being called out by a voice caught your attention.
the voice you had been so desperately longing to hear again.
walking out of your bedroom, you see jonathan standing in the hallway, looking the same as he did before he died. he smiled at you softly, and opened his arms up for you.
you bolted into his arms, and he held you close - finally.
"am i dreaming?" you ask him, finally in his arms once more.
"no, not anymore." he says softly, tilting your head up by hooking a finger under your chin.
"i don't understand." you say, and he looks at you lovingly.
"...he found you cold in bed when he came home from work," he explains softly, "i saw. i told you, i'm always watching over you."
"am i dead?" you ask quietly, and jonathan sighs with a nod.
"...yes, darling." he responds, and you take a moment to process what had happened. you don't remember dying, but yet, here you were. in what appeared to be purgatory, the state between life and death.
"the afterlife is waiting for us." he tells you softly, and you look at him with confusion again.
"afterlife?" you ask, and he points to behind you.
a very bright, gleaming, white portal shaped aura had replaced where the remainder of your hallway would usually be.
you smiled to yourself - there was something so hauntingly peaceful and truly beautiful about this moment. in life and in death, he was waiting for you, and you only.
as he guided you towards the bright light, the two of you walked hand in hand, finally one again.
"welcome home, darling," he says, as the white light consumed you both, "i love you, even after death do us part."
yeah i cried writing this. tagging @kpopgirlbtssvt and @nocturnest because umm jonathan crane!!
#cillian murphy#cillian murphy x reader#cillian x reader#jonathan crane x reader#cillian murphy fanfic#cillian fic#cillian x fem!reader#cillian murphy imagine#jonathan crane x f!reader#dr jonathan crane#jonathan crane fanfic#jonathan crane x you#jonathan crane#jonathan crane x female reader#jonathan crane x y/n#jonathan crane angst
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blueberry₊˚✩⊹sal fisher x reader₊˚✩⊹
(Not edited, so please forgive men if there are grammatical/spelling errors. Random thought I came up with. Please let me know if you'd like more backstory/a continuation of this!
Sitting on top of Addison Apartments was a place to think. A place of silence except the sounds of breathing and the occasional shuffling around. You haven't been up here in a while, since the fight you and Sal had a few months ago.
₊˚✩⊹
"God you're such a hypocrite. You keep telling others to take care of themselves and not isolate, but yet you don't give two shits and don't even take your own advice. Not answering your phone or leaving your apartment for over two months? Do you know how worried Ash was? How heartbroken and distant Larry became?? We thought you were fucking dead Y/n. And after all that you decide to drop by and ask 'what's up'?" Sal seethed, his tone getting more hostile by the second.
You don't think you've ever seen him so angry.
"I'm sorry Sal, I didn't mean to make you all worry. That was the last thing I wanted you guys to feel. You know I don't handle my mental health well," you murmured, avoiding Sal's eyes. You could already feel the tears streaming down your face.
"Listen I get it Y/n, but you can't just cut us off like that. You made us all husks of what we used to be. Do you know how many nights I stayed up till the early morning just staring at my phone, hoping you'd at least call?? I couldn't even remember what you sounded like until today."
"Bluebe-"
"Don't call me that. You have no right calling me that after the months of heartbreak and worry you've caused us. Every time this happens, I get my hopes up in that you won't shut us out and disappear. I get disappointed every. Single. Time. You're lucky that Larry, Ash, and Todd are such forgiving people. You don't deserve them."
You mulled over his words. He was right. You didn't deserve them. All the affection and love that they gave you all for you to throw it down the drain when you got too ill. The hundreds of phone calls from Ash. The constant check-ins from Larry over the walkie-talkie, talking about stupid shit that happened that day or speaking softly about how much he missed you. Todd emailing you every few days asking how you were holding up and if you needed anything, but eventually those emails automatically went to spam. And Sal. Sal was probably the hardest to avoid.
He sat outside your apartment door for hours, talking, pleading you to let him in to talk. He brought snacks and slid them under the door, worried if you were eating enough. Playing his guitar for you through the walkie-talkie, hoping it would soothe you or cheer you up. Sliding random doodles and letters under the door so you had something to help remind you about how much they cared about you. How much he cared for you. You kept them all under the bed in a shoe box, reading over every word and cat doodle every single night.
"I can't do this again, Y/n. You've hurt me over and over and over again. Each time I expected it to end different."
He took a pause, waiting for a reaction or a word from you.
"We're done. I don't know about the others, but don't bother writing or talking to me. I can't do this anymore."
And with that, he headed downstairs, not sparing you a single glance back.
₊˚✩⊹
You snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the rooftop door creak open.
You don't look back, hoping the person would get a hint and leave.
You hear the footsteps get closer, and stopping right beside you.
"Didn't think you came up here anymore." he mumbled, shifting uncomfortably.
Fuck. He was probably the last person you wanted to see right now.
"I come here to think." you stated, looking out to the street and nearby houses.
"Y/n, I'm sor-" "I'm leaving." you cut him off, already knowing what he was going to say.
You've thought about your time in Nockfell and decided that it was time for you to move on. You couldn't be stuck in a time capsule forever. The more time had passed, the more it had started to hurt being here and see reminders of what had happened. Reminders of him.
"What?" he whispered, finally looking at you.
"I need to move on. I can't be here anymore." you stated, trying to keep your voice level.
"You were right, I can't keep leaving people in the dark and constantly worrying them. I'll keep doing that if I stay here. I need to be somewhere else, I don't know where, but I'll figure it out."
"Y/n. If this is about what I said, I'm sorry, I was in a bad state too. I was just so worried that something had happened-"
"Sal, please stop. I'm not changing my mind. I'm leaving tomorrow morning-"
"What about Ash? Larry and Todd? What about me?? I need you here. It was wrong of me to shut you out, to ignore you. I'm so sorry, Y/n."
You finally looked at him, right into his blue eyes.
His hair had gotten longer, choppier, like he'd tried to cut it himself. No longer in the pigtails you loved. Seems like you'd both changed.
"I need to go, Sal."
You walk away, not looking back because if you did, you wouldn't be able to leave. You wouldn't be able to leave them. Leave Nockfell. Leave him.
"I'll see you around, Blueberry."
₊˚✩⊹
#sally face#sally face x reader#sal fisher x reader#sal fisher x y/n#sal fisher#enemies to lovers#sally face x you
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