#so basically the whole first side of the album. i think continuing this w the second side would be a little difficult | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

junova · 4 years

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↬ 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐧𝐞𝐭 | 𝐬. 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬

abstract: the one where steve finds your love letters.

pairing: au!steve x fem!reader

word count: 3K+

warnings: cussing, fluff, angst, crying, slight self-deprecation.

[author’s note]: hey guys! i’m really new to the writing scene so kind words are appreciated! srsly just testing my writing style out and wanted to just post something to motivate me to keep writing. hope u like it. <3

also thank u ari for the inspo and that bomb ass album that saved twenty-twenty. now we just need biden to get elected.

ps. don’t forget to vote! <3

Stevie,

First and foremost, I want you to know how proud of you I am. You have become the man you’ve said you become, the one I always knew you would. You have finally seen what the rest of us see.

A good man.

The soul you carry within you shines brighter than I’ve ever seen. Just for that only, I’m thankful for the time we’ve spent together. Maybe one day, I’ll be brave enough to tell you this without hiding behind the comfort of this notebook. She won’t spill my secrets, fortunate for me.

Some days you have no idea how badly I want to tell you. I think it’s on the days I discover a new fleck of green in your eyes or maybe when you show up to class with a cup of coffee for me without request.

More. More. More.

It’s selfish of me, that much I know. More days than not, I would say you give too much of yourself away. Always wanting to appease everyone, you, Steven Rogers, the bridge to making the people around you happier than they walked in. Even when Bucky drags you into his nonsense bullshit, you say yes without hesitation.

I’ve got not a a clue on how you continue on, how you still remain you when you tend to spread yourself so thin. Who watches out for you? Who cares for you? Who loves the almighty, selfless Rogers?

For me, it’s much easier to pretend you carry too much on your plate than to deal with the rejection I would receive from you. You’re just too good, more than I deserve. More than I would be willing to take. I know I couldn’t possibly give you what you deserve but, I hope that one day you might see me differently. You would see me more than the light I’ve painted myself in.

Even though the shade is lovely, I want to be deeper. Deeper into you on a level which only seems unattainable at this point.

A forever friend. To be in your life, just as a friend, is an reward in itself.

But someday I hope you would love me in the same way I do. It’s all a love struck girl could do. Hope for the best, bet be prepared for the downfall.

With much love, your forever friend.

Tearing the page away from the binding of the overfilled notebook, dispensing it in the first empty drawer you could find, you abandoned the feelings as soon as the pen’s ink bleed out dry.

“You know it would just be easier to tell him how you feel.” You peaked up at the sound of her voice, before realizing she was looming over you, watching your write the letter.

Your supposed, secret letter.

“Nat, please. No.” Opening the drawer, she grabbed the letter but was surprised with just how many she found.

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You’ve written about him multiple times?” You sank in the soft, plush material of your seat hoping that just maybe it would begin to swallow you whole. Hopefully, fast enough were you wouldn’t have to endure the rest of the conversation. One you had been trying to avoid, for the past three years.

“It’s nothing Nat, just forget it.” Just like a Romanov, she couldn’t leave it alone. Even if she tried it was laced in her blood to see any little thing through.

“You really shouldn’t wait so long. A window might close for you, much sooner than you think.” With a curious eyebrow lifted, you felt your breath leave you.

“What does that supposed to mean?” Steve certainly deserved the best and you knew it was only time for him to figure out you would never be enough for him.

“Peggy Carter.” Peggy.

The one girl of a sea of many who had been enamored by Steve. He never really seemed to spend anytime with the women who vied for his attention, but Peggy was surely different than the rest.

Even if Steve was oblivious when it came to the advances everyone would make on him, he saw Peggy. Considering she was the most beautiful woman you had ever seen, she intimidated you. God, did she ever.

On numerous occasions she and Steve had gone out, and even though he assured you they were just friends you were starting to believe he was only trying to protect your feelings. As a friend.

He had never cancelled on you once for her and he would tell you if he had started to date someone, just like he had before.

Even though the entire three years you’d known him he only had one serious girlfriend and after eight months, the pair broke up and even now he still didn’t budge on why they broke up.

“Steve can do whatever he wants with her. He’s a single man. He’s gone out with her before and he’ll probably go with her again.” Then Sam was the next to speak up, dismissing the total bullshit spouting from your mouth.

“Can’t you see he doesn’t want to? The damn man follows you around like a goddamn puppy.” Okay, when did he even come in here?

“God, fuck, no he doesn’t. He would have said something by now, he’s had three years and it’s been nothing but radio silence.” With an all knowing smirk, Sam proposed a new concept into question.

“It has been three years. So, have you ever said anything to him?”

Shit. Fuck you, Wilson.

“W-Well, not exactly.” Sam didn’t have to say anything in response. You knew he was right and you hated it.

Your unwillingness still stood for you, there was just no way he actually would reciprocate your feelings.

“Listen, I think it would be really good for the both of you to air everything out. Peggy is sinking her claws in him and it isn’t too long before they get stuck. Just talk to him.” You nodded silently, but you weren’t sure if you’d ever have the courage to.

—

Emptiness.

It’s all you seemed to feel today. Following you around was a dark cloud, looming over you. Wishing you could be anywhere but your own body. Nothing in particular happened to make you deserve the feeling you were granted with. It just so happened to be one of those days.

From the moment you got out of bed — or rather stayed in bed until four in the afternoon, you felt like anything you would have done just didn’t feel enough. The feeling was fleeting, never staying for more than a day or so, but it made the day drag on. Never ending.

Your muscles sore, body aching from the lack of activity your presumed. Or maybe you had built it in your head too.

Thankfully for you, Nat was busy helping Bucky move into his new place the entire day. She asked if you wanted to help, but mentally you didn’t feel you would be useful for anyone. Simply, telling her you would hang back, claiming you had another an essay to write.

Which you did, you weren’t completely lying, but there was more than your sour mood to blame for your dismissal of social interaction.

You hated to be that girl, the one who needed the presence of men. Specifically, the company of one very beautiful, blue eyed one.

His absence in your life the past few weeks felt heavier on you than you thought it would. You knew from Sam’s intel he had been hanging out with Peggy more and more. He said the two of them were getting close, mercifully sparing you the details.

You hated it’s you’d become. A girl so damn struck over a boy who was giving his attention elsewhere. Upset you were though. Before even if he was busy between classes and his internship at the gallery, he would still text to check up on you.

Now, it was nothing but radio silence letting you draw conclusions on your own. Very, very dangerous territory for you to travel to.

Steve and you are just friends. Get. Over. It.

You thought you’d be alone the rest of the Saturday, especially since it was nearly midnight. Figuring Nat was staying over at Bucky’s and Wanda leaving earlier in early hours of the morning to see her boyfriend for the entire weekend.

Then, an incredibly drunk Steve stumbled into your quaint apartment, the thoughtfully sweetness in him blubbering out with the alcohol flooding through his system. It was like he was on overdrive. More than ready to crash at any given moment.

You had enough when Steve started shamelessly raiding your kitchen, but you remained on the couch attempting to maintain some distance between the two of you. He had a history of being incredibly handsy whenever he had bit too much to drink.

Stumbling his way over to you, almost tripping on the rug, until he was basically cuddling up to your side. His arms latched tightly around you, pulling you into him. Not spared a choice, not that you’d want one.

The security of being wrapped up to him wasn’t something you ever grew tired of. You don’t think there would ever be a time you would ever be capable of turning him away.

“I’ve missed you. It’s been too long.” His soft tone, penetrating the tiny resistance you held towards him. “Me too. I was starting to think you disappeared on me, bubba.”

“Never.” His iron grip holding so tight like he was afraid you’d slip right through.

“Is everything alright?” Trying to pull from him, but Steve seemed unable to let you go. You whispered in his ear, caressing his back.

“I think so.”

“Here, let me grab you cup of joe and some water. Okay? I’ll be right back.” Leaving him a kiss on the cheek, before heading him into the kitchen.

If you had been around him recently, perhaps you would be more in tune with how he was feeling. Then the guilt sept in.

“Sweetheart, do you know where the phone charger is? It’s not by the recliner.” You heard him shout, trying to stop your heart from hammering into your stomach.

Just make him some coffee, sober him up, until he crashes.

Steve always seemed to be a lightweight and somehow whenever he did decide to drink he always found himself routing his way into your home. You thought it was simply for accident alone. The bar he frequented at was only a few block from you.

The past few times he would just stumble into your bedroom, immediately passing out in your soft, silky sheet. Now, he seemed to have more pressing matters at hand.

“Check the drawers, Stevie. I think there’s one you left around here somewhere.” You grabbed the filters and the grounds out, brewing the coffee. Soon, with a black cup of coffee and a water bottle in hand you took note of just how quite he was being.

He was never this silent and it was freaking you out.

“Are you sure you’re o-”

Just like that.

Fuck.

Hunched over, practically on his knees, he read over the endless letters you wrote about him. Confessions never meant to be seen by him. You lost track of how many you had written over the past few years once realized how irrevocably in love with him you are.

He didn’t realize you had found him and you were suddenly paralyzed. Unaware of your presence he continued to read through them and his expression was unrecognizable. One you’d never seen from him before, and you didn’t quite know how to react.

No. He wasn’t grimacing nor did he seem to be elated either. He just stood there just like you, afraid what would happen next.

What did this mean for the two of you? Your entire relationship was purely riding on whatever happened next.

Softly, with a gentle hand, he sifted through them all like he was looking for something specifically. Steve let them fall to the hardwood floors as your shaking hands could no longer support the weight of the dainty coffee cup he had actually sculpted himself.

The glass shattering everywhere, several pieces making their way towards him, thankfully not fiercely enough to penetrate his skin.

Truly, you had never been more sorry than when he looked up at you with tears in his eyes. Threatening to spill over. Because of you.

You didn’t have to be told, you already knew.

Carefully, Steve stood up making his way over to you around the shattered mug. Still you couldn’t bring yourself to move. Simply just watching him until he was right in front of you — more silent than you’d ever seen him before.

“Those were about me. Weren’t they?” You nodded having no reason to lie other than to protect yourself from a rejection you been hoping to spare yourself from.

“I didn’t want you to find out like this. Or at all really.” Your resolve dropping instantly when Steve took a step further gripping by your hips, pulling you closer.

“Why not?” He questioned you, again. Almost like he needed a verbal affirmation of every secret he had just read.

Unintentionally, stealing your soul served for him on a silver platter.

“I know how you’d feel about me, Steve. It’s not how I want it to be and it’s okay.” You remove yourself from him, traveling to the other side of the living room. Suddenly, the apartment seemed suffocating with him in it. “I’m fine, Steve.”

Hearing him sigh in frustration only furthered your immense feeling of being a burden to him.

You’re just one more obstacle he has to deal with.

“One of them dated back for over two years ago. Two fucking years.” His harsh tone, piercing through you like a knife.

“I know. I should have told you.” You whispered, wishing you could disappear into any abyss that would take you. Deeply wishing you just didn’t have to endure for the rest of this conversation. Wishing you could have stopped him from opening that stupid drawer. “I tell you everything, but I just couldn’t bring myself to speak about this. Look at how you’re reacting? How could you blame me when every fear I have about this is justified?”

You really should have kept those elsewhere, not your open, public living room.

“Because it’s us. I’m always here for you.” He was still crying through broken words and you didn’t know why. Almost like you had shattered his resolve and his control leaving with it.

“Not lately. You’ve been otherwise occupied.” Suddenly find the plant in the corner of the room. It certainly weren’t trying to distract yourself from the insatiable cerulean eyes.

The breathtaking british woman wasn’t even here and as soon as she was brought up — there was a wall. Seperating, you from whatever was between the two of you.

“This isn’t my fault. You never said anything. How was I supposed to know you feel that way about me?” He tried to make his way towards you but you just stalked off in the other direction. Circling around the living room like a coward.

“It didn’t matter though, did it? You found someone perfect for you regardless of how you feel.” God, you wish he would just leave so you could let the dam break.

“No. You don’t get to do that. Since the moment I met you I only had eyes for you, but you never seemed like you were interested. So, I dropped it. Okay? You never left me a crumb to think you would ever want to be more than just friends.”

“You were my best friend. You still are. No matter how I felt, it could never outweigh the need I have for you to be in my life.” He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face. Trying to figure out what was next for the both of you. Steve always had to initiate and this time was no different.

“Peggy told me tonight she wants to be exclusive.” His confession washing over you like a ton of bricks. Crushing you.

You really couldn’t have any ill feeling towards her, she was just doing what you lacked the courage and the tenacity to do.

“But I didn’t really know what to do.” He took quiet steps towards you, not wanting to spook you. He voice not no longer held the a warmth of teddy bear, but a man on a mission rather took over.

Steve kept quiet until he had you backed up into a corner, no escape route in vision for you.

“’Cause there’s this other beautiful woman, absolutely breathtaking — and I just I really needed to know how she felt. If I had known before, I never would have gone anywhere else.” His hand caressing your soft, plump lips. Pulling on your bottom lip with his thumb, sending you into a frenzy.

“Then, I just wanted to forget about everything until Sam called me. Three beers deep, when he told me of a drawer filled with letters I should take a look at.” You could feel his breath on you, temple pressed against yours.

“I just need to hear you say it. Just once.” Taking it a step forward, intertwining your finger with his own.

“I love you.” It was all he needed as he sealed his own affirmation with a sweet kiss, inking your lips with all of his love.

#for the love of god let these tags work :/#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x reader fluff #steve rogers x reader angst #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers angst #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers au #college!steve rogers #au #mcu #mcu fanfiction #fanfiction

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yeocult · 4 years

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lover’s guide | s.mg

genre: fluff, slight ansgt, college au

wc: 4.2k words

synopsis: 5 steps to love by song mingi

step one: being noticed

“mingi, are you even listening?” the male jolted up at the sudden call of his name from his professors, earning a few stares from his classmates.

“um y-yes.” he mentally slapped himself for stuttering. mingi sighed and closed his eyes, desperately trying to kill off the feeling that welcomed itself into his mind.

just a few days earlier, during lectures when he laid his eyes on you. he thought it was maybe admiration at first. you were one of the top students of the class and the way you carried yourself with such grace was so attractive to him. your range of style was captivating, each day came with a new outfit. he liked the way you were confident and also was experimenting with different styles. not to mention you killed every look.

the sudden attraction seems like one of those middle school crushes that he could get over within three days, maximum. but even after three days, he didn’t. he couldn’t stop himself from staring at you from across the room and he often caught himself thinking about you.

he would use every chance he got to interact with you, although he couldn’t say he was the best at it. he knew that small smiles whenever you two pass in the halls or that silently complementing your choice of accessories was not enough for you to get the hint of his crush on you. but he did it anyway.

today was nothing new. mingi found himself stealing glances at you once in a while, especially since lectures were long and he rather had his focus somewhere else than some boring discussion about costume history from the professor’s monotone voice.

“mingi can you be any more obvious? if i was them, i could feel you basically staring into my soul from across the room.” his friend whispered leaning closer to mingi to avoid making a scene. mingi scoffs and wooyoung earned an elbow to his side. “don’t word it like that…” mingi fixes his eyes on the professor to avoid getting called on again, “is it that bad?” he quietly asked and wooyoung nodded.

the boring lectures came to an end and granted him a long desired freedom. since it was his final class for the day, he was free to go home and take that nap he craved for. wooyoung was long gone with yeosang as they walked out of the room together, while mingi was a rather bit slower when packing his supplies.

it wasn’t until you came up to him that he felt his whole body freeze. his insides were jumping and he didn’t know if it was from excitement or nervousness, probably both. you held onto your tote bag with one hand while the other was playing with the hem of your shirt as you approached the tall male.

“hey mingi!” you happily greeted him and mingi mirrored your smile and waved back at you. your smile was continuous, how could he not smile back even if he looked like a huge idiot.

“i really like your style. you always stand out,” you paused for a moment realizing how that sounded. “you dress really well, um your style is different from others, i like it.” you added for clarifications, not wanting to sound impolite or anything in that manner.

within less than a minute, you manage to make mingi do cartwheels in his head and the happiest man alive. “o-oh thank you! i actually made this shirt myself. it didn’t turn out well so i just wear it casually—sometimes even to bed…” he trailed off. “thank you, uh i really like your earrings, by the way, they’re pretty.” he tells you. mingi wanted to evaporate right now after so much he just stuttered and rambled right in front of you. he shyly scratched his nape, hoping his nervousness didn’t make the air awkward.

your soft giggles filled the lecture room as you thanked him. then you waved cheerfully and made your way towards the exit, leaving mingi there stunned. you noticed him and that was all mingi needed to know he was in love.

step two: being friends

mingi has been falling asleep with a soft smile and waking up with full energy the past week. because ever since you interacted with him, you two have grown closer. he felt more comfortable and less shy around you. the short greetings have turned into telling each other how his days went and him listening to you praise the new album your favourite group released. the two of you would walk to the bus station together after the bell rings, spending lunch breaks together, and facetime once in a while.

he learned a lot about you during the period he started to hang out with you more. mingi took note that you often wore dangly earrings over studs and that you like to eat strawberries to fuel your body during study sessions. he also learned that you went into fashion major simply for the interest and passion of it, he admired you for that. mingi likes to think that your jewelry choices match you fairly well; bright and attractive.

the two of you have been spending lunch breaks together. during those times, you noticed that mingi is a slow eater and he told you he also makes music with one of his friends, hongjoong, who was a year older than him. you noticed his little habits of laughing with his whole body. throwing his head back and sometimes clapping his hand in amusement. although he might come off intimidating or cold to some people, mingi is definitely the most wholesome person you’ve come across and you still can’t wrap your head around his duality.

you two would sit at the bus station waiting for your ride home. mingi’s place was within walking distance but he insisted on waiting with you. after all, it was a perfect opportunity to spend more time with you. and if there’s anything mingi likes more than you, is spending time with you.

the both of you were browsing your phones while waiting for your bus to arrive. getting bored with the lack of notifications on his phone, mingi leaned in to glance at your phone screen.

“you like cats?” mingi asked you as the both of you watch some fluffy cat video on your instagram feed. you shifted your phone for the better view for him and nodded.

“they’re just so cute, right?” mingi hummed in response. he held back on telling you that he thought you were way cuter than the cats, but decided to save it for another time. you proceed to tell him that your mother is allergic plus that you probably wouldn’t have much time to take care of a pet being in college and all that. he watched your eyes filled with glitter as you continue to watch more cat videos on your screen.

the bus finally arrived and you quickly stood up. it saddens him a little that he couldn’t watch you become all smiley over cats.

“thanks for waiting with me again, mingi. i’ll see you tomorrow.” you gave him a quick hug from the side and softly smiled at him. silently hoping your swift action wasn’t weird or sudden to him, because you really were appreciating the little things mingi does for you. including companying you while your bus arrives.

mingi softly smiled at you. “anytime.” he kept his response short because knowing himself, he wouldn’t know how to speak normally with stutters and rambling if he continued.

he tried to cover up the fact that he’s blushing like a fool right now and his heart is beating extremely fast over a simple and quick hug. didn’t go very well as mingi stood there with his cheeks painted a crimson colour and heat rushes throughout his body. a damn hug. you simply warped your arms around his figure and made your way towards the bus like nothing had happened. like you hadn’t made mingi the happiest person alive.

overtime, mingi was proud to call you his close friend. even though that wasn’t what he exactly hoped for, he hoped for a little more actually. but at the end of the day, he was happy nonetheless to have you with him.

step three: first date

today’s a special day, making you want to doll yourself up more than usual. “is this too much?” you’ll never admit it out loud but being around mingi made you feel a bit timid and shy. the total opposite of how people view you, bold and charming.

you weren’t the type to care about what others thought about you. after all, fashion was how you expressed yourself and you didn’t limit yourself to one style. if you felt like adding one more hair clip to your hair, then who’s gonna stop you? on days when you’ve lost your confidence, mingi would be the first person to compliment you. and that was all it took for you to truly appreciate yourself.

“w-what? no! you look amazing, you always do.” mingi pointed out how your nail polish matches your hair clips and you felt at ease, your body loses its stiffness and you softly smile at his compliment.

mingi on the other hand, felt like he was always overdressing. maybe choose something a little more simple? tone down with the colours? those types of thoughts kept mingi from truly playing around with his wardrobe. he admitted, he was insecure. that all changed when he started to hang out with you. your confidence brushing on him made him careless about what others might think of him. he started layering jewellery and wearing that flashy jacket because he can. you had noticed your little influence on him and you loved that for him.

“you don’t look too bad yourself.” you helped mingi break from his shell and gain confidence, mingi made you feel comfortable in your own skin.

the bell chimed at your entrance. your eyes light up at the environment. the welcome scent of coffee wafts through the air and the soft melody playing in the background automatically brings joy to your face. you’ve never been to a cat cafe before, seeing this amount of cute cats casually walking around has added ten years to your life. mingi and you settled to a small table by the window with a few cats already sitting there on the shelf. the sun shined through the glass, warming up the seat and table. while you busy yourself with your new furry buddy, mingi left to order a few drinks and dessert for the both of you.

as he waited in line, he thought about how lucky he was to even be here with you right now.

“so…” mingi takes a break from drawing figures on his sketchbook and meets your face. you hummed and pulled your laptop screen lower so you can see his face. the two of you were studying together in the library, helping each other in various topics covered in today’s lessons. mingi was always grateful that your schedules line up with his. meaning all of his breaks, he can spend time with you since you were off as well. and since you were both fashion majors, it only made sense if you both helped each other out.

“i have a friend, he works at this cat cafe and i was wondering…” pause. his eyes lowered at his hands fidgeting with his pen. “if you wanted to go with me tomorrow?” he continued but couldn’t help to lower his voice almost to a whisper as he shyly asked you out. he knew how much you loved cats and thought it was a perfect idea to take you to visit the cafe one day.

your face immediately lights up at the idea of a cat cafe. “mingi are you serious? i would love to!” you send him a big toothy grin as you were so excited to be able to go with him. “it’s a date then!”

mingi swore his heart stopped beating and his nose forgot how to breathe for a second at your words.

“you’re deep in love aren’t you prince charming?” his friend from behind the counter teased. san grinned at mingi while typing in his order into the machine. it seem like wooyoung had already told san about mingi’s little secret.

he rolled his eyes, as if he doesn’t get ridiculed enough from wooyoung and yeosang in class already. “and what about it?” mingi scoffs, pulling out a couple bills and handed them to san.

luckily for him, you weren’t around to hear it. although parts of him wished you could hear what just san said because he doesn't know how long he can control his feelings anymore. but mingi wanted his confession to be a bit more romantic rather than his friend blurting it out, so he kept quiet and waited. you were currently occupied with your phone, filling up your photo gallery with pictures of them while waiting for mingi to order.

“it means you should probably do something about it.” san winked, handing mingi his receipt before heading back to prepare his drinks. mingi knew exactly what he meant about that. he knew exactly what he should do about these uncontrollable feelings. but he just couldn’t find the courage to do it anytime soon.

he sighed and glanced towards the table where you sat. he was really glad he brought up the idea of bringing you here because mingi realized how endearing your love for cats was. even from afar, the way you gently pet the cat by the window makes his heart melt. no complaints from him though. if they can make you smile non-stop, then that’s all it matters.

“order up for lover boy.” san announced playfully, snapping mingi out of his thoughts of you and bringing him back from reality. mingi rolled his eyes and blatantly ignored his friend’s word, taking the tray of food in his hand. hearing san giggle from behind him only made him more annoyed but he quickly calmed down at the sight of you playing with a cat’s paw.

“hey. i got your favourites.” he placed the tray in the middle. you thanked him as you took a bite into your strawberry shortcake and a sip from the iced americano. you felt butterflies in your stomach, you couldn’t help but to feel this way towards mingi because he never fails to remember all the little things you’ve told him.

the two of you enjoyed your drinks and desserts and talked about anything that came to your mind. mingi was an easy person to talk to. no matter what you talked about or how long you would ramble on a topic, he was listening to every single word that came out of your mouth. sometimes you would carry the whole conversation and he didn’t mind. and neither did you because something about not worrying or stressing over if you were being boring or annoying was what made you love talking to mingi. your voice was like music to him, he could listen to it all day long. he propped his chin on his hand as you continued to talk.

you jump up slightly at the furry feeling the side of your leg. you melt at the sight of a persian cat making figure eights around your legs. another kitten nearby was on its back, all sprawled out. you both were in awe at the sight of all these cute cats around the place. while you fixed your gaze on the cats, mingi had his eyes focused on you the entire time.

step four: confession

everything was going fine. until it wasn’t.

self-doubts and anxiety starts creeping in and you feel weak. you were unsure, because nothing good has ever lasted this long. you had no idea this would happen when approached mingi. but after that day, you found yourself looking forward to talking with him more. and over time, of course, you fell for him. who wouldn’t?

it felt odd. suspicious. everything was going so smoothly with you and mingi. he makes you feel excited to wake up every day and spend your breaks with him. he makes classes and college a little more bearable. you love the way he unconsciously caress your hand under the table like it’s a habit. you love the little things he does for you like sharing earbuds while waiting for your bus. mingi was an angel towards you.

it was too good to be true.

you were hidden underneath your blanket in a fetal position, curled up with your knee to your chest as you quietly sobbed in your room. you felt terrible. how you’ve been avoiding mingi recently ever since this unsettling feeling started to creep in. you tried to bury your whimpers and sniffs as you heard your door creak open and felt the bed dip.

“hey.” no response. he couldn’t see your face. the only thing he could hear was the shaky breath that you tried so hard to hide from underneath the covers. he could tell you’ve been crying for the past hour or even days considering your current state.

“leave me alone,” you snapped at him. mingi pursed his lips at your jarring words, deciding to push it away because he knew you didn’t mean any harm.

he’s noticed, he always does. today is sunday, he hasn't seen or heard from you ever since friday afternoon. even so, you disappeared right after classes ended and he couldn’t get a hold of you. you weren’t at the bus stop as you normally would, it had mingi worried to death. he started to think about his past actions or words to see if any of that had made you upset, but none came to his mind. opting to just stay by your side for now.

“i haven’t seen you in so long, is everything okay?” he asked but got no response. the lump in your throat prevents you from telling the truth, so you kept quiet. you could only shake your head from underneath the covers.

“i’m here for you, i don’t want you to go through this alone.” mingi took a deep breath. he didn’t like seeing you like this. he settled on the bed right next to your figure, you flinched at his touch when he patted your shoulders gently. he didn’t say a word, he allowed you to continue crying, letting out any pain that has been trapped in there.

and with that, you slowly pulled the covers down. revealing your glossy eyes and puffy lips from the endless hours of crying in your room.

mingi quickly took you into his embrace because he just couldn’t stand the sight of you crying. he’s been dying to hold you. he tells you that everything is okay to be okay and that it’s okay to cry. maybe silence was the best medicine for now, but he felt the urge to tell you that things were going to be okay. he lets you cry in his arms, allowing you to break down as he rubs your back. you buried your face into the warmth of his chest as he held the back of your head and rubbed your back. soft whispers from mingi calmed you down, you focused your mind on his smooth voice to escape the unsettling thoughts that welcomed itself into you.

you pushed yourself off him and took a shaky deep breath, it sounds like you were going to break and tears would storm down your cheeks again but you quickly collected yourself.

“i’m sorry.” you whispered, wiping your face with the back of your hand. you didn’t know what to do now. tell him? or make up an excuse on why you’ve been down lately? tell him that you were afraid that he would leave you? or push off the topic and hope that he’ll buy it?

you played with your hands as you sat there helpless in front of him, until mingi’s voice broke your racing thoughts. “it’s okay. take your time.” he took both your hands in his, caressing your hand with his thumb gently, like he always does. holding them like you were going to disappear any moment now, leaving him alone.

a comfortable silence falls between you and mingi as you both sit on your bed holding each other's hands. until you blurted out the words you’ve been holding back, words you’ve been thinking over and over.

“i love you.”

mingi froze at your sudden confession. releasing his grip on your hands and his eyes widened. he felt like his heart was about to explode. the fluttering in his stomach, feeling hesitant of what to say back because he was definitely not expecting this so suddenly.

“i…” he began, unsure of how to properly explain the complexity of his feelings, “i love you too, ever since i laid my eyes on you.” chuckling at himself at how cheesy he sounded. unashamed of how stupidity in love he sounds right now, because letting you know how important you are to him was his goal.

giggling at how adorable he looks when he proposed his feelings, loving how he can make you smile despite you being a mess just a couple of minutes ago. loving how being here with you, makes you forget all about those negative thoughts. you took his hands into yours once again. a wave of relief washes you over because now. you didn’t have to worry about anything anymore, not when he’s by your side.

“it’s just…” you drop your head down at his hands as you play with his fingers, “nothing this good as happened to me and i just…” you trail off, feeling the tears in the corner of your eyes coming back. just afraid of you leaving me, was what you wanted to say but couldn’t. mingi notices and instantly intertwines his hands with yours.

“hey, it’s okay. i’m going anywhere, okay?” he reassures you, like he was reading your thoughts. lifting up his hand intertwined with yours to your eye level as his little proof. his action didn’t fail to make you smile.

“thank you, mingi. for being with me.”

“like i said, i’m always here for you. now c’mere.” opening his arms wide with a huge grin plastered on his face as an invitation for you to melt in his arm. you hurled in his arms.. finding solace in the crook of his neck, feeling his warmth and taking in his scent.

the room was filled with little sniffles from you, sounding like a toddler who’s favourite toy went missing. “sorry for getting my snot on your shirt.” you shyly chuckled for ruining the slightly romantic atmosphere.

“it’s okay, only because i love you.” if hugs healed, mingi would hold you forever.

step five: being a couple

“close your eyes for me?”

“don’t tell me what to do.”

“you—” mingi sighed. “just do it, please.”

“okay, only because you said the magic word.” you quipped with a smirk.

mingi scoffed. when you shut your eyes, he leads you in front of the mirror. he pulled out the handmade necklace he’s been working on the past couple of days. his hands, unlike the rest of his body, were cold. he carefully brushed your hair out of the way then carefully clipped the two ends of the necklace together. turning them to the front and letting them sit on your collarbones.

it was a simple gold chain with a charm, representing you. he was aiming for a piece you would be able to wear casually, fitting with everyday outfits as well as complementing your other jewelry pieces since he knew you liked to layer them.

with anticipation, you asked if you can open your eyes, mingi hum a tune in response. “i got you a little something, i hope you like it.” slowly opening your eyes to reveal mingi’s gift. heat crawling up your face when your eyes laid on the beautiful piece of gold jewelry resting around your neck. there laid a charm, a key.

“baby…” you gazed at your new favourite jewellery while trying to hold back tears. getting on your tippy-toes, reaching for his cheeks to give him a quick “thank you” kiss.

mingi flashed you a huge satisfied grin, “ta-da! we’re matching!” he pulled his own necklace that was hidden under his shirt with the brightest smile on his face, the type of smile that turned his eyes into crescents. instead of a key, his was a lock. you were in awe at the connection and how thoughtful it was.

“thank you mingi, i love it so much.” you wasted no time wrapping your arms around his neck and a quick peck on his cheeks that made his heart burst into a million pieces.

in a short amount of time, you two managed to brighten each other’s day effortlessly. mingi has never been so wrong about his little crush on you lasting three days. even though it was silly, he thanked himself every day for choosing to wear that shirt. who knew something he put so little thought into could turn to be the best thing that’s happened to him? he was so proud to be in love with such an incredible person. a love he would cherish for life.

“thank you for loving me.”

happy birthday to the best boy, song mingi <3

#ateez #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #song mingi #song mingi imagines #song mingi scenarios #ateez x reader #much longer than i thought but o well...this is my longest work to date lmao #song mingi x reader #ateez fanfic #song mingi fanfic #ateez fluff #ateez drabbles

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crowdvscritic · 3 years

Text

round up // MARCH + APRIL 21

March and April were a whirlwind of vaccines and awards shows! A full year after we starting staying at home, the end of this weird chapter in recent history seems like it might finally be coming to a close, and this pop culture awards season—typically a time full of fun and glamour—captured our moment weirdly well. (Emphasis on the weird.) This month’s recommendations is filled with more Critic Picks than usual, so without further delay, let’s dive right in...

March + April Crowd-Pleasers

Double Feature — 2018 Action Thrillers: Bad Times at the El Royale + Den of Thieves

In Bad Times at the El Royale (Crowd: 9/10, // Critic: 8/10), Jeff Bridges, Cynthia Erivo, Jon Hamm, Chris Hemsworth, and Dakota Johnson are staying at a motel on the California-Nevada state line full of money, murder, and mystery. In Den of Thieves (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 6.5/10), Gerard Butler takes on some of the best bank robbers in the world. Whether you like your action with a dose of mystery or the thrills of plot twists, these will fit the bill.

Double Feature — ‘80s Comedies: Caddyshack (1980) + Splash (1984)

In the mood for pure silliness? Take your pick between a mermaid and a gopher! Five years before The Little Mermaid, Tom Hanks fell for Daryl Hannah’s blonde hair and scaly tail, and John Candy was his goofy brother in Splash (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10). And four years before Ghostbusters, Bill Murray was the goof on a golf course full of funny people like Chevy Chase, Rodney Dangerfield, and Ted Knight in Caddyshack (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10).

Double Feature — 1980s Coming-of-Age Films Starring Corey Feldman, Kiefer Sutherland, and Challenging Brother Relationships That Influenced Stranger Things: Stand by Me (1986) + The Lost Boys (1987)

Believe it or not, I had no idea these two ‘80s classics had so much in common when I chose to watch them back-to-back. In Rob Reiner’s adaptation of Stephen King’s Stand by Me (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9/10), four kids (Feldman, Jerry O’Connell, River Phoenix, and Wil Wheaton) are following train tracks to find a missing body. In The Lost Boys (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10), Corey Haim and Jason Patric move to a small California town and discover it’s full of ‘80s movie star cameos and…vampires? One is a thoughtful coming-of-age story and one is just bonkers, but both are a great time.

Spaceman by Nick Jonas (2021)

My love for the Jonas Brothers is well-documented, so instead of going down the rabbit hole I started digging at 15, I’ll talk about how Nick Jonas’s latest solo album will likely appeal to a wider audience than just the fans of the brothers’ bombastic pop records. It’s full of catchy tunes you’ll play on repeat and an R&B-influenced album experience about the loneliness we’ve experienced in the last year and how we try to make long-term relationships work.

Ted Lasso (2020- )

I love stories about nice people crushing cruelty and cynicism with relentless kindness, and Ted Lasso (Jason Sudeikis) is the warmest, most dedicated leader this side of Leslie Knope. Be sure to catch up on these witty and sweet 10 episodes before season 2 drops later this summer.

Double Feature — Tony Scott Action Flicks: Enemy of the State (1998) + The Taking of Pelham 123 (2009)

Tony Scott’s movies have got explosions and excitement in spades. I love a good man-on-the-run movie, and in Enemy of the State (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10), Will Smith is running through the streets of D.C. after getting evidence of a politician’s (Jon Voight) part in a murder. I also love a tense story set in a confined space, which is what Denzel Washington is dealing with in The Taking of Pelham 123 (Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 7/10) after a hammy John Travolta takes a New York subway train hostage.

Double Feature — Baseball Movies: The Natural (1984) + Trouble With the Curve (2012)

Sue me—I love baseball movies. Robert Redford plays a fictional all-time great in the early days of the MLB in The Natural (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10), and Clint Eastwood plays a fictional all-time great scout in his late career in Trouble With the Curve (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 7.5/10). If you love baseball or actors like Amy Adams, Glenn Close, Robert Duvall, and Justin Timberlake, these movies are just right here waiting for you.

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Nate Bargatze: The Greatest Average American (2021)

Sue me—I enjoy Netflix standup comedy specials that are safe enough to watch with your whole family. That’s exactly the crowd I laughed with over Easter weekend, and while the trailer captures Bargatze’s relaxed vibe, it doesn’t capture how funny he really is.

The Mighty Ducks (1992)

I thought somewhere in my childhood I’d seen at least one of The Mighty Ducks movies, but after watching all three, I think my memories must’ve come from previews on the VHS tapes for other Disney movies I watched over and over again. The original still holds up as an grown-ups, which is why even my parents got sucked in to this family movie while just passing through the living room. Bonus for ‘80s movies lovers: Emilio Estevez is basically continuing Andrew Clark’s story from The Breakfast Club as an adult. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10

Double Feature — New, Dumb Action on Streaming: Godzilla vs. Kong + Thunder Force (2021)

If you want something intelligent, go ahead and skip to the next recommendation, but if you’re looking for something stupid fun, these are ready for you on HBO Max and Netflix. Thunder Force (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6/10) follows Melissa McCarthy and Octavia Spencer as they train to become superheroes who take on superhuman sociopaths wreaking havoc on Chicago, and alongside Jason Bateman, they do it with a lot of laughs. Godzilla vs. Kong (Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 5/10) is, um, exactly what it sounds like, so I’ll skip a plot summary and just say it’s exactly what you want from this kind of movie. #TeamKong

3:10 to Yuma (2007)

All you need to know is Russell Crowe is an outlaw, and Christian Bale is the guy who’s got to get him on the train to prison. I also watched the 1957 version, which is also a solid watch if you love classic Westerns. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

Falcon and the Winter Soldier (2021)

Marvel’s newest series isn’t nearly as inventive as WandaVision, and it may not land every beat, but it’s worth a watch for the fun new gadgets, Sebastian Stan’s dry joke delivery, and its exploration into themes of what makes a hero and what governments owe their citizens. It’s a pretty satisfying entry in the MCU canon, but I’d also recommend re-watching Captain America: Winter Soldier and Civil War—the canon is getting expansive, and it’s getting trickier every year to keep up with all the backstory.

March + April Critic Picks

Best of 2020 Picks

As per usual, the months leading up to the Oscars becomes a binge period for potential Oscar nominees. In March and April, I watched many of the films that made my Top 20 of 2020, including Boys State, The Father, Judas and the Black Messiah, Let Them All Talk, Minari, Nomadland, On the Rocks, One Night in Miami…, Promising Young Woman, Soul, and Sound of Metal. You can read how I ranked them on my list for ZekeFilm, plus reviews of The Father, Minari, Promising Young Woman, and Soul.

Bonus: If you loved On the Rocks, don’t miss this feature and beautiful photography starring Sofia Coppola, Kirsten Dunst, Elle Fanning, and Rashida Jones for W Magazine.

Stranger Than Fiction (2006)

What would you do if you started hearing a voice who narrated your every thought and move? If you’re Will Ferrell, you’ll seek out a literary professor (Dustin Hoffman), fall in love (with Maggie Gyllenhaal), and track down the voice (Emma Thompson) who’s making ominous predictions about your future. Stranger Than Fiction is funny thought-provoking, and an unusual but welcome role for Ferrell. Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

All the Royal Family News

Speaking of stranger than fiction, it’s been a busy few months for the Royal Family. We’ve celebrated 95th birthday of Queen Elizabeth, the 3rd birthday of Prince Louis, and the 10th anniversary of Will and Kate’s marriage. We also lost Prince Philip, and we watched the drama of Harry and Meaghan’s interview with Oprah. No matter what happens to their Crown, I don’t think we’ll ever get over our fascination with the Windsor family. A few pieces worth reading from the last few months:

“In Meghan and Harry’s Interview, Two TV Worlds Collided,” Vulture.com

“The Queen’s Man: Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, Dies,” TIME.com

“Obituary: HRH The Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh,” BBC.com

Goodfellas (1990)

One of my film opinions that makes me feel like a phony is that Martin Scorsese just isn’t my cup of tea. He’s brilliant, but his films tend to be long and dark, two qualities that are never my first choice…and somehow Goodfellas still worked for me? Maybe it was the TV edit graciously toning down the violence or maybe it was that Ray Liotta and Joe Pesci were firing on all cylinders, but for some reason this ‘90s classic didn’t suck the joy out of my evening like Scorsese often does. (Bonus: For a Martin Scorsese/Robert De Niro I don’t really recommend, head to the last section of this Round Up.)

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Fearless (Taylor’s Version) (2021)

Her voice has only matured, so Taylor Swift revisiting her old albums is like upgrading a blast to the past. Plus, the six new tracks make me feel like 15 crushing on that boy in Spanish class again, and her Grammys performance (just before her third Album of the Year win) was magical and folklore-tastic.

Double Feature — ‘60s Action Classics: The Guns of Navarone (1961) + Planet of the Apes (1968)

The Guns of Navarone (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10) follows Gregory Peck and David Niven as they destroy Nazi weapons in the Mediterranean. Planet of the Apes (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10) follows Charlton Heston as he attempts to escape from, well, a planet full of apes. The pacing of ‘60s films doesn’t always hold up, but that’s not the case with this pair. Both are still full of suspense, and you can’t go wrong hanging with casts like these.

Let Him Go (2020)

Kevin Costner and Diane Lane play a farming couple who unexpectedly help raise a boy who lost his biological father—sound familiar? But instead of a superhero origin story, they’re part of a thrilling Western with performances nuanced (Costner and Lane) and showy (Lesley Manville). If I’d watched this before completing my Best of 2020 piece, it likely would’ve been on my list. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

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The Oscars

I’m a ride-or-die fan of the Academy Awards, but I’ll admit even I found this year’s ceremony odd. Instead of focusing on what wasn’t so hot, I’ll recommend a few moments you don’t want to miss:

Emerald Fennell giving a shout-out to Saved by the Bell

Daniel Kaluuya acknowledging his parents’ sex life during his acceptance speech (??)

Yuh-Jung Yoon flirting with Brad Pitt and acknowledging she’s just “luckier” than her fellow nominees

Glenn Close dancing to…”Da Butt”?

You can also read about the historic wins and nominations from this year’s Oscar class and why the Golden Globes were an even stranger production weeks earlier.

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Trailer-palooza!

Movies are on their way back, y’all! I’m counting down the days until I can get back to a theatre, and even if some of these movies are duds, I’m planning to see all of them on a big screen if possible:

Those Who Wish Me Dead (May 14)

Cruella (May 28)

In the Heights (June 11)

Space Jam 2 (July 16)

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (September 3)

West Side Story (December 10)

Also in March + April…

To add to the Oscars love, you can listen to a conversation about what we learn about family, community, and society in some of the year’s biggest nominees on the Uncommon Voices podcast. I join regular hosts Michael and Kenneth in this episode, and I recommend all of their thoughtful discussions on their “What’s Streaming” episodes.

I’ve previously recommended the Do You Like Apples weekly newsletter, so I’m proud to share I contributed twice in March! I wrote about Love and Basketball, directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, and one of my all-time favorite Julia Roberts rom-coms, Notting Hill. (I also tied to win their Oscars pool, but I suppose that’s less exciting for you than me.)

It was a busy couple of months on SO IT’S A SHOW! New logo, new email list, new Instagram, and a host of new episodes about a flop of a Madonna flick, a Swedish children’s TV show, an urban legend turned into a horror movie, one of the best films about journalism ever, and a Martin Scorsese movie about a real boxer.

Most of what I wrote for ZekeFilm in March and April was mentioned in Best of 2020 recommendations…except for The Nest, a film that couldn’t figure out what genre it wanted to be.

Photo credits: Nick Jonas, Royal Family. All others IMDb.com.

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veenussposts · 4 years

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A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

At the beginning of your relationship, Gunhak was quite cautious around you and always asked you with a blush on his cheeks if he could take your hand or kiss your cheek. Now, his hand is always resting on your waist and he kisses you whenever he has a chance. But his most notable display of affection is when he bites your shoulders and cheeks.

B = Beginning (How would the relationship start?)

You were an actor and you were hired to act in Oneus' new music video. On the recording set, you met them and Gunhak couldn't take his eyes off you, but since he was very shy he didn't dare to speak to you until Dongju got tired of his behavior and pushed him with all his strength towards you, causing him to fall into your arms. From then on, your relationship slowly flowed into dating, and all thanks to Dongju.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Your cuddles are his weakness. If he could spend the rest of his days curled up in the comfort of your arms he would do it without thinking twice.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

After spending a lot of time with you and making sure you were the one, the idea of having a place to call home with you brought a beautiful sensation to his chest. Gunhak isn't very good at cooking, he can do basic things, but occasionally he likes to learn new recipes to surprise you. Regarding cleaning, each one of you has your tasks and he always tries to do his best for you and to keep the house in order.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

He would break up with you only if you no longer feel the same for him as before or because he thinks you deserve someone better who can give you all the attention you deserve and that sometimes he can't give you. At the time of the confrontation, he would be the kindest and sweetest person with you since, although things can no longer continue, he really appreciates all the moments lived by your side and all the times you made him happy.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Putting a ring on your finger and calling you his husband is one of his greatest goals with you, but due to your jobs, he doesn't think his dream will be fulfilled in the near future. Because of this, Gunhak gave you a promise ring, promising you that at some point in your lives he would marry you.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

He is the kindest person you have ever met in your life. He always speaks in his soft voice when both of you are sharing an intimate moment and his caresses are very delicate as if you were going to break at any moment. He is always there for you when you start having conflicting emotions, being the wall to lean on when you think you can no longer stand for yourself.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

His hands are most of the time on your waist or hips, and most of the time, he ends up hugging you. His hugs feel like being surrounded by a warm blanket on a winter day, like coming home after a tiring day or like sleeping in your freshly made bed after taking a calming shower. Their hugs are comfortable, relaxing, and full of love.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

The first time he said I love you was on the night of your first anniversary. You were lying on his bed, looking into each other's eyes as he caressed your cheek with his knuckles when the famous three words came out as a sweet symphony from his lips.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

It's very rare that Gunhak gets jealous, he really trusts you and that trust doesn't break easily, but like anyone, he has his moments. When he's jealous his answers are simple, his voice gets lower than normal and his eyes avoid yours because inside him he knows that you would never do something to hurt him and he feels ashamed of his behavior. But after a big talk, a million apologies, and a lot of kisses, Gunhak is your teddy bear again.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Lowkey loves to kiss you in general, the feeling of his lips against your skin is magnificent anywhere, but his favorite place to kiss you is the nape of your neck. The same is the other way around, he doesn't have a preferred place where you kiss him but if he had to choose a place it would be his nose, he can never help but blush and feel shy when you do it.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

HE LOVES CHILDREN. Gunhak is a totally different person when he is around children, his eyes shine, his shyness increases and he gets excited just thinking he can play with them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Depends on the day. In times of work, when he prepares for a new album and you have a new series to record, you don't have much time to be in bed together but you always wake up an hour early so you can have breakfast together in peace. When you both don't have to work, it's almost impossible to get out of bed because Gunhak is hugging you like a koala.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

First, you cook dinner together and then eat it curled up on the sofa while watching a movie. However, the best part of the night is when, before bedtime, both of you take a bath together with music and talk about your day.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Little by little, once he already trusts you.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

It's very difficult, really, get Gunhak angry. He may get a little upset with you for something but he's never gotten mad at you or has gotten to the point of yelling at you and never would.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or do they kind of forget everything?)

Gunhak remembers every detail of the things that are really important to you and those things that you really don't like, but the rest sometimes lingers for a while in his memory and then gets lost.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Your first time together. That moment after a long time, under the moonlight that filtered through the window, where you finally were one, was something that he will never be able to forget, he will never be able to forget the intimacy and love for the other that your bodies radiated that night.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

You are one of the most important people in his life so yes, he is very protective of you. He is always aware that nothing happens to you when you accompany him to public places with many people, that you eat all your meals, drink water, and rest your eight hours per day. Every time you make a dangerous scene and you don't have a double to do it for you, his heart is in his throat all the time. On the other hand, you are not as protective of him or at least you don't express it in words like Gunhak, but he loves the subtle way you do it such as putting yourself in front of him so that the sun doesn't bother him or when you put a blanket on him and take him to bed when he stays up late writing new songs.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Since not every day you have the opportunity to have a date, Gunhak does everything in his power to make each date unforgettable, he even asks his friends for help. But sometimes, as much as he does his best, things don't always go as expected. Once, a group of fans recognized you during a walk on the Han River, and, from one moment to the other, both of you were running to hide. Regard to gifts, he prefers to make them himself, such as writing a song for you rather than buying something, but if you stare at something in a store for a long time, Gunhak will consider it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

For you, his worst habit is when he stays up all night composing songs. He tends to lose track of time and the things around him when he is doing what he loves so much, and sometimes that breaks your patience because he doesn't take proper care of himself. But with the passage of time, Gunhak has learned to control it and from time to time you accompany him.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks? Do your looks bother them?)

Looking good and being fit is a big part of his job as an Idol so most of the time he is surrounded by stylists and makeup artists who take care of his looks but, beyond that, when he's in your home Gunhak is... Gunhak. He wears a comfortable outfit (not too elegant and not too scruffy), sneakers, and just a bit of makeup.

Absolutely not, it doesn't bother him because you will always be perfect in his eyes. But, if he has to speak honestly, he loves when you take off all your makeup after a recording, showing your face as it is, and then putting on wide and comfortable clothes since it means that you trust him and you are not ashamed to show you how you really are around him.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Gunhak thinks that each person is complete by themselves and that he doesn't need anyone else to be wonderful, but that doesn't mean that he feels lonely and that he misses you every time you stay away from him for a long time. He knows that he can be complete and perfect without you but he prefers a thousand times more to be perfect with you by his side so you two can shine together (if that makes sense)

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Once, Gunhak and his groupmates were watching your last series called "Through time". And, at one point in the last chapter, when everyone thought you were going to have a nice and happy ending, your character passes away leaving an open and painful ending to the story. Everyone, absolutely all the members cried but Gunhak felt his heart break after seeing that scene. That same night, when the two of you met in the dorm, Gunhak didn't detach for a second from you and didn't stop saying how much he loved you.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

A partner who is rude to the people around them, even if they are not rude to him, is a big no for him. Kindness, humility, and respect are important to Gunhak and someone who doesn't have them is not a person with whom he would like to share his life.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs? Does it change around a partner?)

When he sleeps alone Gunhak has no specific habit, he only snores a little, but nothing out of the ordinary. When he's with you, he has the habit of tangling his legs with yours and resting his icy feet on yours.

#kpop x male reader #kpop #oneus x male reader #oneus leedo #oneus gunhak #oneus geonhak #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop fluff #oneus #oneus scenarios #oneus imagines

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cheolbooluvr · 3 years

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wait hold on so your follower count has increased by a hundred since I got here? 🥺 this is awesome, Chris, congrats! 🥳 and I think everything can be a milestone if it's one for you 🤗 and if u want to do something special to celebrate, go for it! :D as long as you do it for yourself and not because you feel like you have to, do you hear me? <.< about "Something Special"...it's just 🥺 really something special lmao funfact, when DK started singing "ice cream, you scream" and so on, I was immediately reminded on "Ice Cream" by TXT as the lyrics go "i scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream". Idk if you know them but they had their comeback on monday and this is one of the b-side tracks. I actually had to check if the lyrics are the same but I think you published the fic on the same day they released the album so that would be almost impossible anyway 😅 now, the banner for "the zest of life" is sooooooooo cute 🥺 and everything you post about it just makes me more and more excited skajdjlkwjeadswa literally can't wait until you post it <3 also HAPPY JUNE TO YOU TOO <333 I'm also highkey excited for your other wips, especially your series and the sequels :D the gif of the dog looking out the window is soooooo relatable why are you so cute 🥺 you're right, I discovered your blog through class president and I couldn't be happier about it 🥰 ngl, enemies to lovers (+ fake dating) is one of my favourite genres and then there's friends to lovers and I'm all soft and cuddly 🥺 nooooo, don't make yourself cry D; tho I definitely get your pain 💔 being a perfectionist doesn't make your life easy but it leads to great results when it comes to your fics :D and I'm very happy to hear that you're slowly getting over it and feel better about your writing <3 definitely gonna note that website down since I'm currently trying to write myself lmao failing greatly at it because I never manage to actually finish a wip. which brings me to the fanfic writer ask game :D 🍄 how do you get yourself in the mood to write? I'm really curious about this because sometimes I just can't get myself to write though I actually would love to 🙁 ahhh the good old times in middle school everyone regrets when they get older :'D when I'm on a holiday with my family or literally just anywhere outside I'm taking photos with my phone of everything that crosses my way and looks in the slightest way worth capturing my storage space is hysterically laughing in the distance :') would love to see some photos taken by you some day ngl well, I haven't continued watching Vincenzo yet, I keep watching Friends atm though thanks for the heads up <3 and I love Chayoung, she's iconic but after I learned who she works for I was lowkey disappointed :( trying not to spoiler anything rn for anyone else akjdnwaölkejd srsly, I don't think any of my friends has a healthy sleep schedule though we all have to get up early but I hope you slept well last night and have a great day <3 wait, I wanted to ask you in which time zone you live? Because it was 7pm here when you said it's 11am for you, so I was wondering 😅 sending love and good vibes ❤️✨

yes omg you’ve been here basically since the beginning 😭 i know i say this a lot, but your support means the world to me and i’m thankful you’re here with me on this journey💕 i might just wait until i hit 200 to do a celebration! i want to try to get through these reqs from the first milestone and then we shall see how i’m feeling. but eternally grateful for all the support and growth anyways :’)

hehe ‘something special’ is part of a whole long series i’ve been writing for my friend and i (for our eyes only) but it’s one of my favorite scenes and him dropping the ice cream just felt very on brand 😭 he’s so silly and i love him and his bright energy. also funny story abt txt, i literally decided to stan them for reals w this comeback! so i know exactly what you’re talking abt!!! and actually i just did a smol uke cover of anti-romantic heh it’s been on repeat for the last few days and i love the whole album. every song is so good, esp 0X1=lovesong and dear sputnik, in addition to anti-romantic and ice cream ofc! well actually they’re all good sjdfkjadlf but yeah i think i’m officially a moa now :D

ahhhh thank you i love the banner!! i was soooo excited for it bc i finally figured out how to edit gifs on photoshop which is a GAME CHANGER (had to stop myself from making gifs for all my fics bc my computer actually can’t handle the processing so now i need to update the hardware skdjaldks but that’s another story) anyways ahhh i’m happy to hear that you’re excited for it! i hope it meets your expectations <3

man, my wips, i wish i could i just crank them all out bc i wanna know what happens askdlal i’ve been saying this a lot lately, but i’m like, WHAT HAPPENS and i have to respond to myself like IDK U TELL ME and my internal monologue is just that back and forth 💀 but i think that’s a great lead in to your ask game question:

🍄how do you get yourself in the mood to write? honestly, it usually just kind of hits me at random times. some days, i have so many ideas and so i’ll plot everything out but i won’t actually write, so i’ll leave it for a while and then maybe come back to it when i get too impatient with myself. other days, if i feel stuck, what i’ll do is just kind of word vomit my thoughts and go back and edit everything later, or feel out the vibes. but i feel you, writing is honestly very hard, especially if the motivation just isn’t there :’( but i think my best advice is to just get ideas out of your head and onto theoretical paper!! then just start typing even if it’s just your thoughts like “uh idk what to write but maybe if kdjflsfjlkas”

omg no i feel that, before i upgraded my phone, my camera roll was just full of photos (and also pics of sf9 and svt LOL). but i just made a thread on my twt abt my fave photos and i’d be happy to share them :)) (see below)

mmm i won’t say anything abt vincenzo until you start it back up again ;) but friends!! that reminds me, i need to watch the reunion ep!!??! not ready to cry tho :’)

i hAD a sleep schedule at some point in my life, but now... it’s messed up again LOL but i’m in the mountain time zone in the states ! so 1 hour ahead of PST if that’s any help kdljasf but i hope you’re getting rest and sleep!! i’m a big advocate for sleep and rest so !!!!!!!!!!

anyways, sending my love as always <3

EDIT: JUST REALIZED I NEVER POSTED THE PHOTOS HOLD ON DKJLASKLADS

EDIT 2: okay here we go

#cheolbooluvr asks #cheolbooluvr 🌙 anon

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werejusttouchingeachother · 4 years

Text

DUBAI 2019 [August 26th, 2:00PM]

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 T/W: smut, cursing Words: 8078

“Colour blocking and minimalism,” you state, gesturing to the board where you’d presented a layout of some mannequins wearing your designs. “Both of these aspects will be the focus of this season, without either overpowering the other, but instead finding a way for both to complement each other and be incorporated together.”

Bonjour’s chief editor watches you with careful interest as your voice echoes around the conference room, the table of the entire team taking notes as you switch through the slides on the screen. Your eyes catch Seoyeon who is standing at the back of the room against the wall, her face cast in a frown as she stares down at her phone.

“The concept is simple,” you explain, glancing at Seoyeon before turning to those at the table as you continue. “Incorporating the basic colour theory into what would otherwise be a plain outfit. Emphasising on the interactions between hues, brightness and saturation, we will combine and harmonise colours together so as to produce a range of monochromatic, analogous and alternate analogous looks as we can see in these designs.”

One of the co-directors asks about the outfit on the corner right and the chief editor answers him, gesturing to the screen. Seoyeon looks up from her phone then and you raise your eyebrow in question.

‘Baekhyun,’ she mouths, making your eyes widen slightly and Seoyeon immediately shakes her head, raising her hands in a gesture to make you calm down.

She rolls her eyes as you make your way towards the water cooler next to her, asking loudly, “Does anyone want water?” before muttering lowly under your breath, “What happened?

“He just texted me asking where you are and why you’re not responding to his messages,” Seoyeon whispered. “I told him about the presentation, its fine, go give Jennie her water.”

You stand back with Seoyeon as one of the art directors from your crew head to the front of the room to continue the presentation. You feel Seoyeon’s gaze on you, wondering why you looked like you hadn’t slept a lot but as you turned to her and faked a sheepish smile, she rolls her eyes before turning back to the screen, concluding that you’d just had fun with your boyfriend after several months apart.

You don’t mention the sudden mood-shift that had occurred last night—the way you’d seen Baekhyun wearied down with immense stress suddenly as he sat in your bed, waiting for you from the shower. You’d expected him to crash after all the activities that you’d just done in the bath together but had noticed him checking his phone as you’d gotten into bed, sighing at the warmth of the soft sheets against your skin.

Your eyes were almost closing lazily when you’d suddenly noticed his entire demeanour change. His shoulders had tensed, eyebrows furrowing and those lips that you’d kissed swollen just an hour ago form that half-frown and half-pout that hurt you every time you saw it.

“What’s wrong?” You’d finally asked when he seemed to be unable to lower the phone, eyes transfixed on the screen as he read.

“Hmm?” Baekhyun had let out a distracted hum, forcing himself to sound nonchalant. “Nothing, let’s sleep. I have to be up early for the shoot tomorrow.”

“Baek,” you frown, starting to sit up slightly as you grew more worried at the way he’d been deflecting your concern. “What happened? Is it Hyungnim?”

“No, no, it's nothing, don't worry about it,” Baekhyun reassures you, finally keeping his phone aside.

You’d started to prod further but he’d flicked the light off, plunging the room in darkness and effectively silencing your concern. You’d moved closer to his chest, one arm curling in between your bodies while you wrapped the other around his waist. He’d reflexively wrapped his own around your shoulders, pulling you into him as he stretched the other over the pillow above your head.

You were closing your eyes, almost falling asleep until you felt his fingers drum lightly against your shoulder, a habit of his whenever he was restless.

You waited for his breaths to become slow and deep but his chest remained tense beneath your face, fingers still drumming.

Gripping his hip then, you’d finally pulled back to look at him and Baekhyun lowered his gaze to you immediately.

The window to your room was right behind you and the city lights outside cast a glow on his face that allowed you to see him clearly, the way his forehead was creased with worry and his entire body was tense.

It almost reminded you of that day in the power room, so many years ago when he’d stared at you like you were the only thing he could see which was ironic cause you were in the shadows and he was in the light—you’d seen him better than he could see you.

Except last night, his eyes had looked like they were faraway, a thousand conflicting emotions burning in them. You’d raised your hand then, laying it on his cheek in silent question.

Baekhyun is quiet and you began to think he wasn’t going to answer until his lips part, the words softly escaping his mouth, “It’s the fans.”

You’d immediately frowned. “The fans? What about them?”

“They’re not very supportive about the new project, about SuperM,” he admits with a sigh, sitting up as he ran his hand tiredly over his face. “I expected this but it’s... I don't know, they seem paranoid and upset about it. Their words about Jonginie and me are...”

Harsh. Cruel. Brutal. He doesn’t say it and he doesn’t have to because his grip tightening around your waist is enough to know that he’s thinking it.

Your heart fell as you could only imagine what they’d been saying. It wasn’t new to you—in fact, you were only too familiar with it for every time they slandered Baekhyun on any social media, you were the first one reading through all the posts and feeling your heart shatter into pieces as you prayed fervently that he wasn’t reading through them on the other side of the globe, wherever he was.

You knew this was a hard year for him. With the enlistments of Minseok Hyung and Kyungsoo, all the fans were disoriented enough that the whole announcement of an entirely new super unit was only adding oil to the flames. Even when Baekhyun had excitedly told you about the project, your first emotion was worry as you fretted over his schedule that was only bound to get more hectic with this.

And as if that wasn’t bad enough, of course, the words that a few irrelevant and insensitive fans used only drove in the knife further.

Baekhyun’s fingers were absentmindedly drawing circles on your hips now and you rubbed the pad of your thumb over his cheek, making his gaze focus on you once again.

“Hey,” you whisper. “It’s okay. Those are just a handful of worried fans. There’s a lot more loyal eris there right now, all looking forward to this project and your stage. You know that as well as I do. Don’t worry too much about the few, Baek. It’s okay. This is literally a super group—once that video drops, they’re all going to shut the fuck up right then and there. They’re going to regret everything negative they ever said and reconsider their life decisions. You’ll give them a full blown existential crisis, I swear to you.”

Baek chuckles loudly, his chest reverberating beneath your hand as he smiles at you, grip tightening on your waist. You’d leaned forward to press a gentle reassuring kiss to his mouth then, continuing as genuinely as you could, “Don’t pay attention to them. There's one exol out there loving you twice as hard for every one who doesn’t. And even if they don't, it's okay cause you have me. And no one is going to love you as much as I do.”

“This is sweet and all, Y/N but I’m the cheesy one in this relationship, remember?” Baekhyun reminds you and you’d promptly slapped his chest, muttering, “Shut up, you love me.”

“That, I do,” He’d admitted, pressing a kiss to your forehead before settling down into bed with you. He didn’t say anything after that but his tight grip around you and the way he smiled against your head was enough to know that he was better.

As his breaths finally quieten and deepen, he softly whispers, “I’m glad you’re here. I really… really missed you.”

You’d hugged him tightly then, feeling the weight of his words, hearing all the underlying love in it.

It killed you every time you’d seen his name in an article this entire year—he’d been having back-to-back promotions and schedules, and it didn’t help to see him grow thinner as the months went on. You’d been so ecstatic during his debut as a soloist, a dream that he’d only mentioned abashedly to you as if it was too far out of reach. He’d even commented that you were more excited than him when the schedules had dropped because you knew more than anyone, he was more ready than ever to finally become a soloist and fully explore his creative potential and vocal range in his own album.

You needed this. Both of you did. Even if you didn’t have many days together at Dubai, he was home in your arms and you’d missed him more than you deemed possible.

You blinked as you heard an applause, startling from your thoughts to see that your colleague had just finished her segment of the presentation. Seoyeon nudges you forward to wrap it up and you head back to the front of the room.

After about an hour, the meeting dismisses and you retreat from the conference hall. You've just sat down in your office when you hear the door open. Your eyes widen when you see Baekhyun enter, dressed head-to-toe in black, complete with a bucket hat and a mask over his face and Seoyeon in tow.

“If you let him out of this office, I won't care and will stab you in front of everyone here, Y/N, do not go wandering off without telling me,” Seoyeon threatened, waving a stapler in your direction before stepping back out of your office, shutting the door behind her.

Baekhyun looks over at you, glancing at the door in worry. “She seems stressed.”

You shake your head at him, smiling. “She’s right though, you should be careful when you walk around here. Since it’s a new team, they already think I’m gay due to the lack of gossip and relationship rumours so I’d rather keep it that way.”

He raises an eyebrow at this, smirking suddenly. “Maybe I should anonymously release those pics from my secret folder of you then, those will certainly prove a point or two—”

The phone on your desk rings, cutting him off and you shoot him a warning glare as you pick up.

Seoyeon’s voice immediately says, “Hey, there’s a package for you, do you want me to—?”

“I'll come get it,” you respond, gesturing to Baekhyun as you hang up. “Wait here, I’ll be right back. Just hide behind the desk.”

You leave your office, walking to Seoyeon where she stood with the delivery man. She was overlooking the bill as you stood beside her, glancing at the board she held. “Jute and taffeta?”

“It’s there.” She peers over the window to the right, glancing down at the vans that were parked in front of the office. “I’ll send someone to check anyway and show them to the warehouse.” She turns to you, shooting you a look. “I’ll take care of everything outside so why don’t you just stay in your office?”

You roll your eyes before nodding and turn around, heading back to your office and closing the door firmly behind you. You frown as you notice the empty space, eyes scanning all over your office as you search for your missing boyfriend.

You’re about to call his name aloud when he raises his head from behind the desk where he'd been crouching.

“Oh wow,” you grin, blinking in genuine surprise. “I almost didn’t see you there.”

Baekhyun sits down in your leather seat, smiling as he crosses his arms on the desk. “I like this seat. And this desk. And you sitting here.”

You raise an eyebrow in question, smiling amusedly at his words and he grins, responding to your unasked question, “I'm getting some kind of power rush sitting here.”

You move your hand towards the door, shifting the knob so it locks as you cock your head at him. “What do you mean ‘power rush’?”

“It’s cool to sit at an official desk like this, with some high spinning chair. Like a rich CEO from a drama.”

You walk to him then and stop in front of the desk, eyes still watching him. Baekhyun grins as he meets your careful gaze. “What?”

You pursue your lips, wondering if you should press forward with the risky game you were thinking. “Nothing,” you finally say.

“Tell me.”

“I can’t decide if you look like a baby and whether I should coo at how small you look in my chair or if you look hot and all boss-like and whether I should—”

You stop as you get the reaction that you;d been wanting, watching him switch in front of your eyes like he always did on stage—the crinkling, smiling eyes relaxing and his pouty lips parting as he straightens in the seat, crossing his hands in front of him. His gaze is dark and impenetrable as it locks with yours and your brain almost short-circuits at how intensely you feel it, your nerves suddenly heightening as your body temperature rises from just his eyes alone.

Baekhyun raises an eyebrow at your silence. “Have you decided?”

You don't say anything and his hand takes your reading glasses from the desk, leaning forward. You lean over the desk involuntarily and he lays them over your face, biting his lower lip as he sits back to look at you, hand reaching out to tug on the strings of the front of your blouse. The bow at the collar comes undone in his deft fingers, the strings hanging down and exposing the deep plunge-neck of your blouse that now displayed a generous amount of your cleavage underneath with the way you were leaning forward. You watch your boyfriend’s pupils dilate as his gaze immediately drops to your chest, his long fingers tightening on the end of the strings. Feeling a burst of confidence that made you throw caution to the wind, you raised your leg and threw it over the desk.

Baekhyun’s eyes widen then, lips parting as his eyes remain transfixed with yours. He sits back in your chair, losing his powerful demeanour momentarily as you climb over the desk and move towards him on your knees. The desk isn’t as large as your conference table—your hands are already gripping the edge of the desk on his side as you perch over it. You can hear every breath he's taking and his stare won't break away from yours, the intensity of your locked gazes almost making the air surrounding the two of you hotter. You raise your hand to clutch the front of his jacket, slightly tugging him forward.

You don't have to try very hard as Baekhyun eagerly moves forward on the seat and meets your mouth in a desperate kiss. His hands move to grab your arms as he roughly yanks you forward from the desk and you let out a slight squeal as your hands reflexively grab the armrests of his seat to stop your fall. You manage to land clumsily on his lap and Baekhyun helps adjust your position, hands working at the speed of light to tug your pencil skirt up your thighs.

“Is this glued on, why the fuck is it so tight?” Baekhyun finally grits out and you can’t help but laugh at the annoyance in his tone, making him shoot an incredulous look at you while you whip off the glasses and throw it back on the desk.

“Are you laughing right now?” He demands in disbelief, hands momentarily stopping and resting on your thighs. “Woman, you're wearing sexcretary glasses and looking like an eight-course meal with your shirt open and your hair hanging down right now. I'm trying to fuck you here and you're laughing.”

“Here, let me,” you say to relieve his frustration, yanking the skirt up over your ass and bunching it around your hips. Baekhyun lets out a relieved sigh when his hands finally feel up your exposed thighs.

You straddled him more comfortably now, feeling his hardness press up into the tight space between your thighs that seemed a lot smaller with the constraints of the skirt. You bite down on your lip to hold back the sounds that were threatening to leave your mouth as you feel his fingers slip under the thin lace of your panties, shifting it over the curve of your ass and running his digits teasingly over your slit.

You’ve yanked down his sweatpants by then, not bothering to take it off as you pull out his cock and smile slightly when it almost smacks him against his stomach.

“Careful, I have to go back to the set in these,” he mutters as you adjust your position, hovering slightly above him and holding his length as you slowly slide down.

“Relax, I have a million shirts here for you,” you respond with a sigh as you feel him fully inside you. You grab his shoulders for support, flipping your head slightly so your hair is away from your back as you begin moving your hips slowly.

Baekhyun tugs on the front of your blouse then, making you glance at him.

“Take it off,” he states and you shoot him a look to which he takes a deep breath and you immediately know he’s going to start his stupid rant about how long it’s been as he opens his mouth wide and loudly starts, “Three months since I saw my girlfriend’s—”

You slap your palm over his mouth and use your other hand to start tugging your blouse off. Baekhyun smiles as he kisses your hand, moving your hand away for you to easily pull the garment off. You yank it off your neck, tossing it aside and feel his hands move to your back, unclasping your bra and tugging it off your arms quickly.

“You’re so fucking tight,” Baekhyun grunts and grips your waist tighter then, watching you as you throw your head back and began moving your hips against his, bouncing on his cock. Your hands found his shoulders again as you bucked your hips faster and faster, desperate to reach your high as you fucked yourself on his length like a madwoman. Heavy, uneven breaths left your parted lips as you felt his thick cock reach deep inside you and hitt you right where you needed him. You moan aloud when Baekhyun suddenly lurches forward on the seat, mouth latching onto your bouncing breast and fingers digging into your hips as he begins thrusting his hips up into you.

“Fuck, yeah,” you groan, feeling your lower stomach tightening with the familiar knot as your orgasm drew closer. You closed your eyes tightly, focusing on the pleasure building in your veins when suddenly, a loud ringing interrupts your breathy whines.

Your eyes snapped open and you turned to look at the phone ringing on the desk. Baekhyun tightens his grip on your waist as he pushes the seat forward, bringing both of you closer to reach the phone. You shoot him a warning look as you pick up the phone, forcing yourself to sound normal as you answer, “Yeah, Seoyeon?”

“Grazia is calling about the article,” she informs you, seeming oblivious to what was going on within the walls of the room, outside which she sat. “They’re asking when you’re free to discuss all the pieces from this line.”

You bite down on your lip harshly enough to draw blood as Baekhyun presses your back into the desk until the edge is digging into your skin while he sucks and bites your nipple noisily with his wet lips, purposely being louder and rougher so as to make you slip.

“This-this weekend,” you stutter, your voice sounding breathy despite your efforts to stay composed. You almost curse out loud as you feel the sharp sting when his teeth sink into your breast in a particularly playful nibble and you hurriedly answer, “This weekend or any day after that is fine.”

There’s a pause and you can hear the disbelief as she starts, “Y/N, are you-oh my g—”

You hang up immediately and almost shriek as Baekhyun wraps his arms around you and lifts you onto the desk, sitting you on the edge of it. Your eyes lock as he grabs the sides of your neck and starts slamming into you, reminding you of another time that he’d taken you on the desk in your office.

“Yeah, right there, fuck,” you breathe as he keeps thrusting roughly and quickly into you. Your eyes roll back in your head when you feel his hand on your other breast that hadn’t been sucked raw by his mouth earlier, thumb and forefinger tugging and tweaking the nipple and sending sparks of pleasure all through you.

You grab his head as you hear him groan, crashing your lips against his in a fierce kiss to stifle your moan as he cums inside you, flooding you with his warm white heat. Your walls pulsate around his length as your own orgasm takes over you right after him, your entire body shuddering as you cream over his cock.

Baekhyun circles his arms around you as he holds you to him, his member softening inside you as he heavily sits back down onto the seat, pulling you with him and adjusting you over his lap. You can’t feel your thighs as you sigh softly against his neck, feeling him drop a kiss on the top of your head the way he always does after sex.

You’ve lost count of how many times he’s done it but you definitely knew that it’d been more than three years of it and still never failed to make you smile.

“When do you have to leave?” You murmur softly, glancing at him.

Baekhyun hummed softly, his chest reverberating against your bare one. “I have time. My schedule is done for the day.”

“Whoa, what, really?” You blink in surprise, straightening in his arms to look at him properly.

“Yeah, tomorrow is Taemin-ie’s shoots,” he replies, thinking for a moment before continuing, “And then the rest of the group. Don’t worry, I get to rest now. You have me for all of today.”

You straighten completely then, leaning back against the desk to grin down at him. “Seriously?”

Baekhyun nods, smiling at your excitement and leans forward to kiss you sweetly. You circle your arms around his neck and push him slightly onto the seat as you kiss him harder. His hand reaches for your chest again and—

The phone blares loudly, interrupting both of you again. You sigh in frustration as you swivel the seat towards the desk and press the button to answer it.

Seoyeon’s voice sounds rushed as she says, “Yeah, hey, I’m sorry but Yeong Jae wants to see you and you need to… stop whatever you’re doing.”

“Who?” You demand, furrowing your eyebrows in confusion as you glance at your notepad on the table with your schedule.

“Kim Yeong Jae?” Seoyeon repeats in hopes to trigger your memory. “Bonjour’s assistant editor?”

Shit.

“What? Now?” You shoot Baekhyun a wide-eyed look before scrambling off of his lap, stumbling to the floor since your legs have gone numb. He quickly reaches for you, grabbing your arms and helping you up as you say, “We were together for hours during the entire meeting and it’s almost been an hour since then, why hasn’t he left yet?”

“Yeah, about that.” She drops her tone when she murmurs the next words, “I don't think he wants to be 'conference-together' with you.”

Baekhyun shoots the phone a look and you don’t meet his gaze as you quickly snatch the phone up, taking it off speaker.

“I’ll call you back, let me just hide him,” you say hurriedly before hanging up.

“What’s going on?” Baekhyun looks at you in confusion as you grab your blouse from the floor and quickly pull it on. It’s halfway around your neck when you realise Baekhyun is holding up your bra with a flat expression.

“Damn it,” you hiss, peeling off the shirt again and snatching the bra from his hands, quickly clasping it behind you as you mutter, “Okay, you need to hide. This guy from the magazine wants to talk about something and it probably won’t take too long so just hide for now.”

He frowns, still seeming off-sorts as he nods and begins to crawl under the desk.

“Wait, no, Baek,” you say, grabbing his arm as you gesture to the gap down. “Not there, he’ll see your feet at the bottom. And he has this habit of walking around when he talks so he’d definitely notice you.”

Baekhyun frowns at your words as he straightens, watching as you struggle to pull your blouse on quickly and tie the knot at the neck. “Has he been here a lot or something? Who is this guy?”

It hadn’t clicked for him yet.

“Assistant editor, it's fine, I'll explain later,” you reply quickly, not wanting him to dwell on the familiar name as you wave off his concern and grab his arm, looking around. Your eyes fall on the wide closet that is opposite your desk, against the wall and close to the door. You open it hurriedly, shoving the garments in the left side to the top shelf with enough space for him to fit inside. You pull him to it, instructing, “Just get in the closet.”

“God, this is ridiculous,” Baekhyun mutters as he crawls inside the wardrobe, folding his legs to fit all of him. He glares at you as you tuck his shirt to his side and give him an apologetic smile before closing the door.

“There’s vents through here so you can breathe, don’t worry,” you whisper, running your hands down the front of the closet with its narrow parallel lines.

“And see,” you hear his slightly muffled grumble.

“Just a couple minutes,” you promise, stepping away from the closet to straighten your hair and clothes. You glance at the mirror on the right door of the closet and once you’re sure you look semi-decent, you stride quickly back to your desk and sit down, dialling Seoyeon.

Yeong Jae walks in even before you place the phone down, smiling as he enters.

“Y/N,” He greets and your smile falters at his casual tone, your plan of keeping this conversation brief and formal out the window as soon as he uttered your name with such familiarity.

Yeong Jae and you had first met in Venice several months ago when you’d flown out to research the fashion scene in Italy by yourself and with Seoyeon, of course. The timing hadn’t been right—supplies and stocks had been low since you’d reached later than the others, you had your deadline for the fashion line at Dubai approaching closer and you’d been stressed.

Yeong Jae had taken an interest in you as you went around visiting all your mentors from your apprenticeship days—he’d arrived weeks earlier with a team from Bonjour since they were doing a documentary on the behind-the-scenes of launching a fashion line. He’d been helpful since his project helped him know exactly which places had exactly which raw materials that you needed.

But then he’d been too helpful, much too eager to help you.

Fortunately for you, you’d had the perfect excuse—it was time for you to leave again. You were purely there for business and he had to respect that.

The problem here was that Baekhyun did not know about these interactions. And he didn’t need to which was why you had to get this man out of your office before he said anything stupid.

“Hello, Yeong Jae,” you greet him politely, crossing your arms. “What can I do for you?”

“Oh, nothing as such,” Yeong Jae grins, crossing his arms over his pristine suit as he flashes you his charming smile. He cocks his head thoughtfully as he says, “It's been a while since the last time we met, hasn’t it? When was it? Seven months ago? Venice?”

Goddamnit.

You wince internally as you nod and say, “Yeah, Venice.”

He nods enthusiastically. “Oh yeah, materials for this fashion line, right? It looks really fantastic, I have to tell you. Truly your best, I think.”

You smile then, shoulders slumping slightly as you thank him sincerely.

“Yeah, well.” Yeong Jae strides forward slowly then, hands gripping on to the top of the seat opposite your desk. Your gaze falls on the closed closet behind him before flying back up to him.

God, leave, why won’t you leave?

“It's been a while. How have you been?” He continues his stupid small talk.

“Well, busy, actually,” you emphasise in an effort to show him your disinterest for any suggestions that he is probably already cooking in his head. “It's a bit better now that I'm close to launching everything but there’s still more to do.”

“Yeah, I guessed,” Yeong Jae nods, eyes raking over you sympathetically. “You look a bit tense actually. What do you say about grabbing dinner tonight?”

There it is.

“Oh, I'm sorry, I have plans actually.” You pull out your best apologetic expression with the tone to match. “I have to run through the photographs of the fashion week with a couple of magazines.”

“How about tomorrow night then?”

You’re already ready with the excuse—dinner with family cause you obviously cannot cancel on family—but he beats you to it, moving to stand right in front of your desk now with his hands on the edge as he leans over it, face hovering above yours.

“Let me guess, plans tomorrow night too, huh?” He asks, raising an eyebrow at you inquisitively. “You know I'm starting to see a pattern here. Do you have something against dinner, Y/N?”

His tone is playful and teasing but you can hear the underlying annoyance at being put off every time, a subtle pry.

“Even in Venice,” Yeong Jae prods when you don’t respond. “I thought I could show you around the city but you said you were busy then too.”

“I know my way around Venice, Yeong Jae,” you respond, which wasn’t a lie. “Too well, trust me.”

He shakes his head, smiling. “That's not the point and you know it. But let's say it is. I don't know my way around Dubai and you've been here for a little more than a year now. You can't show me around a great restaurant, can you?”

You don't say anything because unfortunately, he has put you on right on the spot with his question and you're struggling to keep your eyes on his face when you can feel a familiar gaze burning into you from the closet behind Yeong Jae.

“It's not dinner you're against, is it?” He says. “It's me?”

You’re quiet, your brain scrambling for excuses. You choose to not lie then because you know he's caught you and is entirely too stubborn to let it go. Deciding to neither deny nor agree, you instead say, “I'm sorry, Yeong Jae.”

He cocks his head, raising an eyebrow in surprise at your easy defeat. “So? What's the reason? Are you really gay like all your co-workers say?”

Whoa.

You narrow your eyes at the unexpected question, frowning. “I really don't think that's any of your—”

“It’s a yes or no question, Y/N,” Yeong Jae’s voice sounds indignant for the first time since you’ve know him, his eyes narrowing accusingly at you. “Or at least give me a maybe, cause I can work with that. You refusing me every time I ask you out is kind of starting to annoy me now so if you're playing hard to get, you aren't supposed to carry the game on this long, babe.”

“Do not call me babe,” you immediately state sharply, your tone no longer polite nor friendly. “If you’re annoyed at my refusal, you're going to have to deal with that yourself, Yeong Jae. I'm not obligated to go out with you if you keep asking me over and over again nor if it annoys you when I refuse. I'm not interested in you and that’s something you need to accept.”

“I will when you give me a reason because I can’t accept 'not interested'. Have you seen us together? That fashion week we went to at Venice, do you remember the tabloids?”

Yes. Yes, you do, far too well – because the bright happy man whose gaze was scorching into you from the closet right now had gone so incredibly quiet over the phone when he’d seen those wretched headlines that you had to fly out in between your fashion week and see him and hold him until he wasn’t shaking anymore in the fear that he was losing you.

If it hadn’t clicked before for Baekhyun who the man in your office was, it definitely had now.

You’d closed your eyes involuntarily at his words and your silence makes Yeong Jae continue in a less condescending tone and almost persuasive as he says, “We look great together Y/N. If you gave us a chance, it'd be really great. I think, even for your brand.”

You scoff at this, incredulous at even hearing the suggestion as you narrow your eyes at him. “Pretty sure my brand is doing great enough without me dating someone just for the headlines.”

“Who said it’s just for the headlines?” He gave you a suggestive smirk and you were positive that your blood was boiling at this point.

And the fact that Baekhyun was overhearing this entire conversation with basically a front-row seat was your worst nightmare turned reality.

“You should leave, Mr Kim.” You tone is firm as you stand up. “Unlike you, I'm busy. Don’t you have articles to write?”

“Give me your reason and I will.” He steps back from leaning over the table, crossing his arms as if to tower over you even though the desk was between the two of you. “I told you, I'm not leaving this until you tell me. Is there another guy?”

“You can think whatever you want, Yeong Jae. Whatever helps you sleep better. Or not. I don’t care.”

“So you are lesbian then?”

“Get your nosy reporter ass out of my office, Kim,” you grit out, glaring at him.

“You know, I can just say you're lesbian and this entire reputation you’ve built can go to crumbs just like that. I can take your riches back to those rags you came from.”

You can’t help the loud boisterous laugh that escapes as you hear the ridiculous threat. Yeong Jae scowls at your reaction and his hands clench into fists on the desk, head lowering as he grits his teeth. Your eyes widen then as you see the closet door opening and Baekhyun looked angrier than you’d ever seen him, his eyes narrowed into slits. You shake your head vehemently and Yeong Jae lifts his head to look at you, making you freeze and regain a poker expression.

“That’s cute, Kim,” You respond with a grin to infuriate him more. “Real cute that you think you can destroy me. You should bottle all that confidence and sell it somewhere, maybe then you'd finally make all that money and headlines that you're so desperate for. If you don't get out of my office right now, I'm going to call security.”

“Seoyeon, is it? You two seem rather close,” Yeong Jae warns, gesturing to the door by cocking his head in its direction. “I'll release articles that you’re in a relationship with that assistant of yours.”

You look at him like he's an idiot—which, considering the last few minutes, he definitely is. “What are you, in sixth grade? Unlike your frenzied readers who read your trashy gossip columns about which celebrity looks fatter during pregnancy, Yeong Jae, people love me for my talent, my designs and my work. Not my face so go ahead and do your worst. You have my blessings.”

You pick up the phone on your desk, pressing zero to connect to Seoyeon and he scoffs, “You're an arrogant bitch, Y/N.”

He turns to leave and there’s silence on the other end of the phone as you breathe heavily, feeling distraught.

“Please tell me that was that dickhead calling you that and not Baekhyun,” Seoyeon pleads on the line and pauses. “Okay, he just stormed out of your office while glaring at me so it was him? What happened?”

“A lot,” you mutter as Baekhyun steps out of the closet slowly, his eyes on the floor. Hurriedly, you say, “Don’t let anyone else in here until I call you.”

You hang up abruptly and call out, “Baek.”

“You know, for a designer, that closet is designed pretty uncomfortably,” Baekhyun jokes, not meeting your eyes as he laughs in a fake manner. “That's some hard wood in there, my butt hurts.”

“Baek—”

“I should go, it’s getting late.” He grabs the face mask and bucket hat that he’d hidden under the cushions on the couch, quickly pulling them on. “They need me on the set.”

You gape at him, aghast. “I thought you said you were done for the day.”

“Yeah, I just. Got a message. They want to redo some shot.” Your shoulders slump as you read through the obvious lie while he turns, muttering, “I’ll see you later.”

“Baek,” you call out again, the desperation in your voice finally making him stop. “Look at me. Can we at least talk about this, please? Don’t do this.”

At these words, he finally lifts his head and looks at you. “Do what? I’m not doing anything.” He gives a small smile then, one that didn't meet his eyes that were reflecting the same ache you were feeling in your chest right now.

“That’s the thing, isn’t it?” He says, shrugging as he walks to you. “I’m not doing anything. I’m literally doing nothing.”

You’re speechless, your eyes pricking with tears and you feel suffocated suddenly at his words, your chest heavy as if something was pressing down on it. Baekhyun lifts the phone and presses zero, saying, “Seoyeon—”

“Hey, I was just about to call,” she says hurriedly. “Everyone just left for lunch and the floor is clear right now so if you want to leave—”

“Okay, I'm on my way out now,” he says, hanging up.

You want to stop him but your limbs are frozen and you watch as he leaves the office without turning back. You collapse on your seat, fingers angrily grabbing the roots of your hair as you let out a strangled sob, biting your lip hard enough to taste blood in an effort to not weep.

It’s almost ten minutes later when Seoyeon finally pokes her head into your office, frowning as she sees you.

“Hey, what’s going on, you okay?” She walks quickly over to you, arm coming around you. “Your hair suggests sex but the fact that your mascara is streaking down your face and you look like you’re crying right now doesn’t seem good.”

“Did he say anything?” You look up at her, sniffling slightly.

“No, he was actually very quiet which was very uncharacteristic of—wait, did you two fight?” Seoyeon frowns and you watch as her eyes widen, realisation crashing on her face as she curses. “Yeong Jae. Venice. Shit. Oh god, was it that bad?”

You shake your head, choking back more pathetic tears but then Seoyeon freezes as she goes, “Shit. Wait. Oh fuck.”

“What?” You look up at her, eyes widening as you watch the shocked look on her face. “Seoyeon, what?”

“I caught a cab for him, yeah?” She said hurriedly, looking panicked. “He didn’t tell me where he wanted to go but just that he wanted a cab so I assumed he knew where he was going. Then he was calling someone and I saw him pull up the contact on his phone. It was Park Gae Jin.”

“What?” You frown in confusion. “Gae Jin? Who’s that?”

“Y/N,” she looks at you in disbelief. “The reporter from Dispatch, the one who Baekhyun’s beloved Hyungnim hates? The one who—”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Your heart is racing as you scramble for your phone on the desk, opening up Twitter to check if anything was trending. “He wouldn’t, he wouldn’t, not now, oh my god.”

“Call him,” Seoyeon stated, grabbing your phone since your hands seemed to be trembling and you couldn’t focus. You watch her with bated breath as she scrolls through and then types in his name.

“There’s nothing,” she says. “The last updates about him are all the pictures from when he arrived at Dubai airport.” She looks at you as you exhale a loud sigh of relief, leaning back in your seat tiredly. You run your hands over your face and she sighs, holding your phone out to you as she repeats, “Seriously, call him.”

“You think I haven’t tried already?” You groan in exasperation. “He won’t pick up.”

“Not him, you idiot,” Seoyeon rolls her eyes, taking your hand to place your phone in it. “Hyungnim. Call Manager and tell him to stop that idiot. He’s here in Dubai too, right?”

“I don’t have his number here,” you reply, scrolling through your phone. “Wait, I’ll call Jongin.”

“Kai, yes, call him.”

You chew nervously on your lip as you wait for Jongin to answer. As soon as you hear his soft confused ‘Noona?’, you tell him to give the phone to Manager, who is thankfully on set with him.

“Y/N?” You hear Manager’s concerned voice and you almost cry out loud.

“Hyungnim,” you mumble shakily, a term that you realise you’d never used to address him before. “Could you please find out where Baek is, I don’t think he's thinking straight right now. He might be wanting to do something stupid out of impulse so could you—?”

“What, what, what's going on? Slow down, Y/N.” He pauses and horror leaks into his tone as he asks, "Wait, did you two break up?”

“No no, god no. We just had a bit of a... I don't know what to call it, we didn’t really fight cause he left before I could even say anything.” You sigh, voice cracking as you say, “He’s very hurt right now and he just stormed out, please just find him and stop him from doing anything stupid.”

“What do you mean ‘stupid’?”

You hesitate before saying, “Something stupid like calling some reporters in Korea and telling them about us so guys will stop hitting on me.”

Manager is quiet for a second before he mutters, “I’m on it. Thank you for telling me. I’ll text you as soon as I find him so don’t worry, all right?”

You sigh as you lower the phone to your desk, feeling frustrated enough to scream.

What if he’d already called Gae In? Was he promised an exclusive and the only reason that nothing is out yet is because he’s waiting for Baekhyun to get back to Korea for all the details?

You glance up, gaze drifting to the windows on your right. Despite being almost late into the evening, darkness had yet to fall over the sky, the sunlight still streaming into the office through the wide windows.

This is a foreign city. He doesn’t even know the language, god, he better not be wandering about…

Seoyeon calls your name, turning your attention towards her as she says, “I'll drive you home.”

“What, no, Seoyeon, its fine.” You shake your head, straightening in your seat.

Her voice is firm as she says, “I’m taking you home, Y/N.”

“Seoyeon, I said—”

“I wasn’t asking, Y/N.” She shoots you a look that shuts up all further argument and you nod with a sigh, giving in and placing the keys to your Mustang on her outstretched hand. This wasn't the first time she took this motherly tone with you and not for the first time, you wondered where she’d be if she weren't your right hand.

To which she always replied, without missing a beat, “No other place I’d rather be.”

She waits until you’re both comfortably seated in the car and you’re fidgeting with your phone, glancing at the screen every three minutes for any messages before she speaks again.

“You need to talk to him, Y/N.”

“And say what, Seoyeon?” You ask, already knowing she was going to start from this. “There’s nothing for me to console. I can’t tell him its fine because I know it isn’t, he knows it isn’t – hell, you know it isn’t.”

She bites her lip, her eyes not meeting yours as she starts backing the car away from the parking lot.

“What?” You ask.

“What? I didn’t say anything.” Her tone is defensive.

“You want to, though,” you counter. “Just say it, Seoyeon.”

“I was just thinking of three years ago.”

Italy. Privé. Your first meeting.

Your eyes immediately narrow at her and you huff. “What? You want to say ‘I told you so’?”

“No, Y/N.” She shoots you an exasperated look. “I wanted to ask if you regret it.”

“Not for a second,” you reply immediately, without missing a beat. “Seoyeon, I... He's the best thing that has ever happened to me besides the boutique. Yes, it hurts right now and I wish things were easier, I wish the industry wasn’t so fucked up, I wish he wasn't so famous, I wish I was an idol so I could at least shoulder the burden, I wish... that we were average normal humans who could meet and date like everyone else. I don't know what I'm wishing for but I do wish it was easier than this.” You pause and sigh before saying, “Regardless of that, I do not regret it. I never will. I love him too much for that.”

Seoyeon is silent as she keeps her eyes on the road and you finally say, “What? Nothing to say?”

She shakes her head, biting back a grin. “I’m sorry, I’m just trying to imagine you in a girl group.”

You roll your eyes, saying, “Seoyeon, I swear—”

“No, seriously, just imagine the concept. You in short skirts and ponytails. Maybe you’d want dark and sexy but imagine you get sweet and pure. Like Twice's Likey.”

“Shut the fuck up.” You laugh with her, hitting her arm as she slows the car to a stop at the signal. You lapse into silence, the worry creeping back into you and Seoyeon's voice is soft as she says, “Where do you think he is?”

“I’m not sure, he won’t answer.”

“Jongin?”

“He’s not answering either.”

“He’s in Dubai, it’s not like he knows his way around.”

You flinch, remembering Yeong Jae’s words from earlier when he asked you to show him around.

“You need to talk to him,” Seoyeon repeats. “From what I can see, you both are insecure about the fact that your relationship isn’t public, except maybe the roles are reversed now so you need to have a proper conversation about it instead of just ignoring it every time something happens.”

“What do I even say, Seoyeon?” You lean back into the seat, throwing your hands up in frustration. “You saw how mad he was when he walked out. Even if I did speak of it, this wouldn’t be the first time we’re having this exact issue, it...”

You trail off and her voice is small as she prods, “New York?”

Both of you visibly flinch then, which is all the answer she needs.

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appleb0mb · 4 years

Text

Hyacinthus Art Process! (Part One)

ART PROCESS BELOW!!! (forgive me if I’m salty, I was looking for the link for Step One for almost HALF AN HOUR)

Also end and forgive me I made the bunning Hyacinthus PURPLE. Luckily I change it but S T I L L I’m ANGRY ABOUT IT

Step One - Rough Draft

Okay! So I started this album around October 20th, 2020 on a Tuesday (lol).

When I was thinking of the song (while doing the covers of the last two), I really wanted to show that power and desperateness of Jamil (and how he indulges and relishes in it). I remembering see this pose by yama_kome and I really liked how they represented Jamil’s overblot.

Ever since I saw this incredible piece of art, I wanted it to be done in this kind of way. Now, since I’m releasing covers of Scarabia (Mystique and Cardenalia), I decided to do it this time for his overblot.

Besides, I wanted to change things up a little bit!

This took me a while to get (almost a day I believe?), but when there’s a will - there’s way.

Just to let you know: I was originally going to name the song Hyacinth but if you say all the Scarabia Trilogy’s Tracks in order - it wouldn’t sound right. So that’s why I changed it to Hyacinthus.

Secondly, I feel like if you say a flower’s scientific name than its common name - it gives that effect of a beginning, of a source and of an origin. I feel like the Overblots are a representation of their true feelings and emotions (in this case, Twisted Wonderland) so that’s partly the reason why I changed it as well.

Step Two - Rough Lineart

This dang lineart took me till Thursday, October 22nd. Here’s why.

1. I COULDN’T WING IT THIS TIME - there was a lot going through my head as well as references about what I wanted him to wear. Other ideas popped into my head such as, “Should I add some blot there?” or “What should I do for the shirt?”.

So many ideas, but few were added.

2. The DESIGNS. - So many interpretations and stuff were everywhere, and they all looked good. But the problem was the amount of time to put such beautiful details. That killed me.

To sum up one and two, my brain for ideas went brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-

Steps of Lineart (at the top of my head - yes. I don’t write this in the time I’m doing it because it slows me down lol):

1. Face (was done already) - more specifically the side profile to the neck

2. Nose Piercing (yE-)

3. Mouth Piercing (hOt-)

*4. Braided Hair (*dies*)

*5. Veil on Face (then the pattern waaaaaay after)

*6. Dazzling-Jewelry-Neck (more sure about doing the neck first, but #6 and #7 can be interchangeable)

*7. Snakes (only the right of the art piece though/snakes nearest to braids or plaits)

8. Upper Body

9. Robes

*10. Chest

11. Shoulders

12. Right Hand - Fingers

13. Right Hand - Fingernails

14. Right Hand - Palm

15. Left Hand - Fingers

16. Left Hand - Fingernails

17. Veil on Body

18. Ear (YUP, I FORGOT THE BUNNING EAR-)

*19. Snakes (left of Jamil and his beautiful hair strand)

20. Right Earring

21. Left Earring

22. Thing on his head (nope, don’t know the name and I ain’t bothering)

*For numbers 4, 5, 6,7,10, 17 and 19 in particular, I had to do multiple layers to make the detail. I would say:

#4 - Two layers: One for the plaits and one for the line...thingy...

#5 - Six layers: It’s technically two, but I had made multiple to get the pattern I wanted. Sadly, I didn’t achieve it so I decided to stick with the one above.

#6 - Six layers: THE FULL DANG TRUTH. The diamonds were first (1), then the line separating the pearl and diamonds (2), Later the designs of the pearls + rectangular thingies (3), The triangle into multiple triangle thingies were next (4), Soon after was the circles into multiple circles + Two triangles overlapping each other (5) and then that last bit at the end of the neck (6).

There’s actually more due to the designs of the diamonds and pearls, but I’m not going that far into memory lane.

#7 - Eight layers: If you count them, that’s how much layers I had to go through.

#10 - Four layers (without counting the two (or three) patterns that you see up there): That darn pattern (1), Them s p i k e s (2), That thing it’s being held up in (3), that pattern near the spiky pattern (4).

#17 - Four layers: Just count, please. Going up and down with my eyeballs is killing me.

#19 - Seven layers: Not as bad (because it’s pretty small), but whatever. (1 - 3) First three ear piercings you see (you may see two though), that tail, long thingy (4) that crap Bubbles wear...them circles (5 & 6), and that diamond. (hehe cATER DIAMOND)

HI!!!

You better read that crap. I took a good while writing it. If you did, you earn my biggest respect and time in the inbox.

Step Two and a Half: Cleanup WITHOUT the Background

Ah. The nostalgia. That feeling when you forgot the flower you were supposed to be working on...

Words, text and speech can not even compare to the feeling I had when I rEALiZED, I foRGOT the BUNNING FLOWER-

Step Three: COMPLETE Cleanup

Perfection. Isn’t that nice?

Step Four: Coloring

October 22nd, 2020 at 11:03 AM...

Immediately when I thought of Jamil I immediately wanted to give him that w h i t e s c h e m e

The reason why I wanted to was because he hard more darker colors in his normal design, and besides - his power has something related to the meaning of white ;). Anyways, I made sure that the ivory (celestial?) theme continued to flow through the whole art piece. Basically, making this smol boy a goddess-

Also, I was thinking that this Overblot scheme would be his true form or something, but he kept it locked away maybe due to how much it takes up his health. Consider this idea though as 100% “Not-Fully-Developed-But-Getting-There” Idea.

I really wanted them snakes to be white. Sorry not sorry.

Plus, I wanted that veil black instead of white, but I was way too into it to ever think of that apparently. In particular, them f i n g e r n a i l s. I absolutely wanted Jamil to have that light peach color and all that so I did it! Makes my heart go UwU-

Annnnnnnd cut! That’s Part One for you.

Hyacinthus [ Art Process - Part Two ] here!

Thank you for your continuous support!

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sweetwritertanya · 5 years

Text

Sing With You (Part 2)

Summary: Much to your disbelief, you were actually recording a song with the boy you had the biggest crush on since you found out about him. Always so professional and friendly, you learn that Jungkook had been keeping a secret… that changes everything.

Warnings: this is pure FLUFF. Nothing to worry.

REQUESTED: YES! Someone requested a part 2, so here it is! Also, FYI, if you ever want a sequel to one of my writings, feel free to ask. But if you want it with smut, tell me or I’m gonna assume you mean fluff. Anyway, hope the person who requested this likes it!

Word Count: 2342

It took him a week to actually reach out. You had already accepted that nothing was going to happen, why would Jungkook be so interested in singing with you? He had lots of other female artists he could collaborate with, more famous and prettier than you, surely.

But when you received a text from an unknown number saying it was Jungkook, asking if you were serious about the proposal he made the night of the charity event, you shrieked and threw your phone to your bed. You were so amazed that he was actually texting you about it.

Regaining composure, you texted him back that you’d be honored to collab with him and were willing to work around each other’s schedules to make it work.

It started very professional, with both of you reaching out to your labels, explaining the situation. No opposition was lifted from any sides, and the collaboration seemed to have a green light. You had an ever present grin on your face as you texted back and forth with Jungkook, trying to come up with a theme and ideas for the song, voice memos with melodies going back and forth.

A few weeks after, though, you found yourself talking to him about things completely unrelated to work, telling him about your day and the new visions you had for your next album. In return, he would tell you about his day also, about the schedule he had and even about his mistakes and short-comings he struggled with. Something you always comforted him about, knowing he was very hard on himself, a lot more than he should.

When he started texting you jokes and memes just for the laughs, that’s when you realized that you may be developing more than a professional relationship with the boy. Maybe, just maybe, he actually wanted to be friends. And your heart skipped a beat at the thought, your smile so wide it hurt your face.

Those thoughts changed, however, on the first day of recording for the song. He invited you to go and record with him on his studio, even offering for Yoongi to listen to the first draft of the song and see what he thought, maybe improving some things you and your team were missing.

The producers that were recording both you and Jungkook on the studio informed you they would take a fifteen minute break, going downstairs to grab a coffee. It was just you and the boy on the recording booth.

“I think this is going so well!” you exclaimed, feeling so happy you were basically jumping in place with joy. Jungkook found it adorable and couldn’t help but smile lovingly at your enthusiasm.

“Can’t wait to hear how it will sound when we’re done” he shared your passion.

“Yeah…” You bite your bottom lip, eyes shifting to your hands, paying with your fingers nervously as you considered if you should say what was on your mind. Jungkook tilted his head at you, curious about what made you shift in mood. “You know, I haven’t said this already because I thought it was obvious, but… Thank you, Jungkook. For asking me to sing with you. For being so patient during this chaotic process. And for being so friendly with me. I never thought, in a million years, that I would ever befriend someone like you. So, thank you.”

You gazed up at him and he was staring strangely at you, a lost look behind his chocolate eyes, making you blush and regret saying anything, for now you were embarrassed and had no idea how to behave. You settled for turning your back and pretending you had somewhere to go to.

“I… I’m going to get coffee too. Do you want something? I can bring your order up if-”

As you were about to reach the door, a hand curled around your wrist, pulling you away from your exit. His hand was not forceful, even shaking slightly as you turned back to him, uneasy eyes slowly raising up to set on his. He winced almost imperceptibly under your shy gaze, being his turn to avoid direct eye-contact with you. He was chewing at the side of his cheek, a guilty expression on his beautiful face, and you knew something was up.

“Y/N, I… I h-have to confess s-something” he murmurs, letting go of your wrist and shoving his hands on his pockets, still not looking at you but rather at your feet. “I d-don’t want to be friends. I never w-wanted to be friends.”

Your heart breaks right then and there, like someone just drilled a hole right through it, your eyes filling with unshed tears at the pain. You stopped breathing, afraid that any movement would only increase the pain that was threatening to break you.

“Oh… That’s fine” you lie in a whisper, your voice betraying you and whimpering a bit. “W-We’ll just finish this song and go on our ways. Don’t worry, I won’t b-bother you.”

He looks up at that, frowning with confusion until he sees your watery eyes and realizes what he said. Immediately his confusion turns into panic and he gasps, raising his hands in front of him, as if trying to stop the whole situation from continuing.

“NO! N-no, that’s not what I mean” he yells, anxious and growling in frustration with himself, scratching heavily the side of his neck. “I meant to say, I don’t want to be just friends. I, I like you, Y/N.”

You watched with parted lips and wide eyes as Jungkook’s cheeks and ears turned a bright red, his eyes glancing everywhere except at you, shifting his feet nervously. You weren’t sure you heard him correctly, the pain you were just feeling still too fresh for you to hang on to hope.

“I-If you don’t like m-me, that’s okay” he started to say, hurt evident in his tone. Reality seemed to hit you all at once and you took a deep breath, bringing your hands to your open lips, still in disbelief of what was happening.

“Please don’t play with me” you ask, shaking your head as you stared at the awkward boy in front of you.

“I’m not” he insisted, frowning his eyebrows, feeling slightly offended you thought he would. He was about to say something else, probably out of frustration, but you stopped him.

“Because I like you too. But if you’re just messing with me, this is really not funny.”

In complete awe, you saw as the facial featured of his attractive face changes before your eyes. His frowning eyebrows rose in his forehead, dark big eyes widening brightly as he finally set his gaze on yours, no nervousness behind them, the cheeks rising as his lips curled up in the sunniest, cutest, most angelic looking smile you had ever seen.

“You like me?” he asked in a whisper.

“Yes. Very much” you confessed back, as lowly as he did.

Before you knew what was happening, two arms enveloped you in the warmest of embraces, squeezing your back close to his chest, his head falling to the crook of your neck as he spanned you around for a moment, extracting the silliest giggles out of you.

“Oh, thank God!” he exclaimed, still holding your close as he settled you down, but raising his head just enough so you could stare at each other. “I thought I made a mistake telling you. You got me so scared for a moment, Y/N” he admonished you.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t like you back?” you questioned tilting your head, bravely lifting your arms to surround his waist and keeping him close. You still could not believe this was happening.

“Well, I hoped you did. I mean, I’ve been flirting with you since the beginning and you never hinted me to stop, so…” he explained, but you frowned at that.

“Flirting? When did you flirt?” You truly had no idea what he was talking about.

“All the time. The jokes I told you, the compliments I gave you, the voice memos of me singing for you, they were all me flirting.”

“I thought you were just being friendly! And the singing was about the song we are making, how is that flirting?” You chuckled as he touched the tip of his nose to yours, making you blush slightly. At least he was blushing too.

“I never said I was good at flirting” he offered as an elucidation. “But I am good at this.”

And that’s when he lowers his head down, still holding you in a warm hug, and pressed his soft lips against yours, in the softest, sweetest and quickest of kisses. It gave you a brief electric shook and your heart skipped a beat at the gesture. When he pulls back, he sees you smile up at him shyly and he smiles too, taking your breath away even before he came down to repeat the movement.

With a bit more pressure and precision, his lips are on yours and move ever so tenderly, making you sight into the kiss and lean more into him, not sure if you’re strong enough to keep your legs steady. You kiss him back and his hands pull you that much closer to him, even though your bodies were already as close as they could get.

“J-Jungkook” you call as you come up for air, though he continues pecking all over your face, barely acknowledging your warning tone in your voice. “Hey, the producers will come back any minute now” you remind him. He humms into your skin, making you tremble underneath his finger at the feeling.

“They said fifteen minutes. We have about ten minutes left” he says, continuing the peck in your jaw. It was really difficult to be logical when he was so close, living such lovely kisses on your skin, his aromatic woody smell numbing your brain.

“W-We should be careful, Jungkook” you tell him, stepping a bit away to get your senses back together. He was way too intoxicating.

You hear him sigh sadly and look up to see his adorable pout in his lips, brows coming close with frustration. This man had the unique ability of being sexy and adorable at the same time.

“But I wanted to kiss you for so long…” he complains, tugging at your hand, trying to pull you back in. You giggle and get close on your tippy-toes to kiss his cheek instead, to which he both whimpers and smiles.

“Take me on a date and I’ll let you kiss me for however long you want” you assured him.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” His energy levels almost triplicate at such a promise from you, and he is all wide eyes and big smiles the rest of the day.

He made sure you kept your word on every single date he took you in, reassigning every free time he had on his schedule to be spent with you, even if only over calls or video-chat. He was the sweetest, most caring boyfriend you could ever ask for and the novelty of the relationship never seemed to wear off as the months kept passing by.

Rumors were starting to spread about you two, no matter how private you both tried to keep it. Ever since you released your collab song, that turned out to be a major hit, people had been shipping you two and any time you two were even in the same building gave away for articles to surface. You were a bit worried at first, but Jungkook never looked bothered by it.

A year into the relationship, you two were scheduled to, for the first time ever, sing your song together on stage. It was something you were so excited for, not only because you never got to sing with Jungkook for your fans live before, but also because you had not seen him for two weeks and were missing him like crazy.

You were on one side of the stage while he was on the other, and when you saw him you jumped in place and waved widely in his direction, making him smile and wave just as enthusiastically back. For once, you were not nervous about going on stage. All you had in your mind was Jungkook.

The song started and you both walked on stage, the fans yelling so loudly you could barely hear the music on your ear-piece, but you didn’t care. You sang with all the passion and feeling you could muster, your gaze never wondering too far from Jungkook’s, who was staring right back at you while he sang.

You reached up to hold his hand on the last bridge of the song, which he then took and made you spin around a couple of times, making you giggle while you sang, but you never missed a note. He then pulled you in and you were chest to chest, his hand on your lower back keeping you close while he held the microphone with his free hand. You were holding your microphone with both hands on top of his chest, feeling right at home when surrounded by was warmth and scent.

The song ended and both of you lowered your microphones, you smiling warmly at him and him looking at you with such love you felt like melting. And you almost did, when he suddenly pulled you in for a kiss a second before the lights went out on stage.

The crowd went wild but you zoned out everything except for the feeling of Jungkook, kissing him back with as much passion as he was kissing you, arms raising around his neck, pulling him closer as the kiss deepened.

You would only be confirming what hundreds of magazines and news reports were speculating already. Maybe going public would be a good decision after all. Jungkook didn’t seem to mind. And that performance would forever be the most well-known performance of your whole career. And you were so fine with that.

#bts #bts x reader #jungkook #jeon jungguk #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook x you #bts jeon jungguk #bts fluff #bts fanfction #bts fanfic #bts imagine #fluff #request

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wydmariana · 4 years

Text

hi my loves ! ur fav big mess dani here , i also play our hailey fc alanna heh ! i’m bringing back my bbyg mariana ! she’s my original wealthy character & i’ve had her for like over 3 years , i’m super excited 2 be playing her again & i hope u guys rly like her !!! i’m gonna put all the tea on her under the cut & if u wanna plot like this & i’ll come bug u , i rly always need connections n love plotting ♡ u can also hmu on discord !! @ 𝒎𝒈𝒌'𝒔 𝒘𝒉𝒐𝒓𝒆 .#1958

new york’s very own mariana cavello was spotted on broadway street in christian louboutins . your resemblance to selena gomez is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being stubborn , but also adroit . i guess being a gemini explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be lyrics scribbled in a notebook , gold jewelry , & blue nail polish . ( i defeaned a girl in a fight when i was 17 ) & ( cisfemale & she/her ) + ( dani , 20 , she/her , est . )

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡ 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒄𝒔 :

full name: mariana marisol cavello

nickname(s): mari,

age: twenty four

date of birth: june 4th

hometown: new york city

current location: upper east side, new york city

ethnicity: half mexican

nationality: american

gender: cisfemale

pronouns: she/her

parents names: alexander hastings, liliana cavello

orientation: pansexual but she doesn’t like labels

religion: grew up catholic, undecided

political affiliation: democrat

occupation: singer/songwriter

living arrangements: lives in her own mansion in the upper east side

language(s) spoken: english, spanish

accent: american

face claim: selena gomez

hair colour: x (most basic/accurate/but it changes)

eye colour: brown

height: 5″5

weight: 113lbs

build: petite

tattoos: mostly selena’s canon, but x instead of the music note

piercings: x (both ears)

drugs/alcohol/sex: yes/yes/yes

pets: one cat, 5 years old, named sergio - x

astrological chart : gemini sun , libra moon , scorpio rising

character inspo : meredith grey ( grey’s anatomy ) , simone davis ( star ) , alyssa ( the end of the fucking world ) , carla ( elite ) , kat stratford ( 10 things i hate about you ) , serena vanderwoodsen ( gossip girl ) , jessica davis ( 13 reasons why )

pinterest board : here .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡ 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒓𝒚 & 𝒂𝒃𝒐𝒖𝒕 ( tw : abuse , violence , injury , sexual assault . ) :

ok i changed her around quite a lil bit so i’m excited to rEdevelop ! :~)

mariana was born into a seemingly perfect family , her older brother & her having been born heirs to alexander hastings , billionaire hotel & business entrepreneur , shark-tank cast member ( think kevin o’leary vibes .. yeah . ) & liliana cavello , legendary supermodel ( think cindy crawford )

she was spoiled bc they were rich af , so like she never NEEDED for anything , except LoVe :)

mari was quick to blow her dad’s money but did he notice ? no

she still is kjdfnsjdf

mariana was a happy child, but growing up in a household with her father quickly became toxic

she started noticing it when she was around 10

his yelling , his anger against her mother , the hostility towards the entire household

the relationship between her parents always had been toxic but now that they had kids it was quick to spread through the whole household

as mariana grew older and started high school , there were times where she would sit in one of the offices of her father’s buildings and do homework while she waited for him to finish so they could go home

at the mere age of fifteen was the first time one of her father’s co-workers sexually assaulted her in an empty conference room after everyone else went home & she’d be waiting for her dad

this continued for a little under 2 years .

this is when her behaviour at school started to get out of hand, she’d start skipping class, get caught smoking pot, talking back to teachers, etc

it went on for months & mariana suspected that her father knew and wasn’t doing anything to stop it

when she turned 16 & got a boyfriend , it started affecting her even more . she was struggling w being intimate bc of these things that were happening to her

which is when she eventually confronted him about it , in tears , in the kitchen with her mother

it resulted in a screaming match

mariana’s behaviour completely went off the rails after that day & she went to school one day & got into a fight with this girl who was taunting her

they fought and mariana’s anger got the best of her & she ended up beating the girl so bad that she became deaf in one ear

shoutout to degrassi for the idea Ok female sean cameron in the house

( i needed a secret for mari n i was watching this so i was like .. ok why not lol )

she turned 17 shortly after this argument and by some miracle ( aka money ) her dad was able to keep her out of juvie despite the charges that were brought against her

this is mariana’s secret!!!!!

anyway now , she doesn’t talk to her father really , at all . unless her mom ambushes them into the same room which sometimes happens jkfnsf

mariana moved out on her 18th birthday , still has a good relationship with her mom and brother & extended family

when mariana turned 18 was also when she started her career !! she started out as an actor in a few different movies

she got her big break when she starred in a ‘riverdale or like , grey’s anatomy’ type of show a few years ago prob when she was about 19

and that went on for 2 or 3 seasons before she stopped it to pursue music bc !

writing and singing and performing have always been Mariana’s passions & emotional outlet

anyway , she dropped a single while on the show & it did well so she proceeded to drop an album which also blew up

she is now rly successful w her music career and loves it sm , like it’s literally her dream come true ok

it’s the one thing that makes her happy

so yah , if ppl knew she deafened a girl totally wouldn’t b all sunshine n rainbows :/ hehe .

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡ 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒚 ( tw : drugs ) :

mariana is very lowkey crazy

like she knows how to hide it but girl , it’ll come out

she can definitely be a brat , she wasn’t raised with proper consequences & often thinks she can do whatever she wants , has a bit of an attitude about it

she hates being told what to do

and will voice her opinion

she is also the most loyal & loving person you know , but the thing is it’s very hidden deep down rn . she is completely walls up , doesn’t wanna let anyone get close to her bc she’s a PUSSY

and like , she hasn’t worked through her trauma & probably never will

the only opening up she does is when she’s writing music

daddy issues galore over here

but she’s a lowkey softie when she waants 2 be

when she loves someone she loves fiercly !!

mariana . is a . party . animal

it’s basically all she does

like every night , her stamina is insane bc she can go out every single night until 3 am if she really wants to .

and she’s fun too , if she’s going out she’s getting WASTED

she’s the type of drunk girl to make out w all her friends

she loves cocaine, is most definitely an addict ( but who isn’t in this city ), tequila is her alcohol of choice, but she’ll drink anything you give her & weed is her creative saving grace

we luv a bitch who doesn’t care abt her health !

u will most likely find her in sweatpants and a hoodie or a big tshirt

she will dress up to go out & luvs lookin cute for paparazzi & career stuff

um , she listens to a lot of rap and just lays in bed w her cat smoking blunts

um n ya .. sad bitch vibes :/

╰ ˚･ﾟ ♡ 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 :

i have a wanted connections page here & a wanted tag here !!! i need & want every connection so pls hmu ! like this & i’ll come to you .

#wealthyhq:intro #omg <333 #come plot w me pls

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fmstevie · 4 years

Text

* ╰ waddup y’all ruby’s back 2 annoy u all w a lil british fuckboi action . here’s stevie , inspired by matty healy n thinkin she’s a god among men . i don’t recommend u read on but in case u do i pray u forgive me enough 2 want plots w that like button . 🤡

new york’s very own 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐄 ‘ 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘 ’ 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄 was spotted on broadway street in doc marten smooth leather chelsea boots . your resemblance to diana silvers is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty - second birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐬 , but also 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐞 . i guess being a cancer explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be erudite inclinations informed by a god complex , melodrama as your magnum opus , & the world’s most secretive love life . ( i had a secret marriage that lasted 6 months but ended due to my fear of my family’s mafia ties getting in the way . ) & ( cis female & she / her )

𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆 : stephanie charlotte greystone 𝒏𝒊𝒄𝒌𝒏𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒔 : primarily stevie , although her stage name is ‘ grey ‘ which has caught on as a go-to nickname . takes little to nothing else wilingly 𝒂𝒈𝒆 : twenty - two 𝒛𝒐𝒅𝒊𝒂𝒄 : cancer 𝒐𝒄𝒄𝒖𝒑𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 : professional musician with a voiceclaim of lorde , on temporary hiatus to write grey3 . casual photographer 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒕𝒚 / 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒔 : cis female / she her hers 𝒐𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 : pansexual w strong female pref but tbh if u can handle her energy she’ll b down WKERWJER 𝒉𝒆𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 : 5’10 🤤 𝒍𝒂𝒃𝒆𝒍𝒔 : the hedonist , the aesthete , the opaque , the vainglorious , the prodigy , the intangible concept 𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒔 : rhiannon - fleetwood mac / WHAT U CALL THAT - chase atlantic / iceberg - borns / UGH - the 1975 / boss bitch - doja cat / elephant - tame impala / black hole sun - soundgarden / black madonna - cage the elephant / this charming man - the smiths / swim - chase atlantic / 1999 WILDFIRE - brockhampton

tw drug mention

𝒊. 𝒅𝒊𝒔𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒕𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏.

there is perhaps no more a formidable surname in the organized crime circuit in all of europe than greystone , a name risen to fame through countless court cases and highly publicized trials . dubbed ‘ el chapo of the old world , ‘ liam greystone makes his reputation known as a ruthless and conniving leader of a million dollar cartel business , distributing to most of the UK and eastern europe . it’s perhaps an even greater shock to find even as public enemy #1 , he takes a welsh wife by the name of marissa and weds her in a lavish and very public ceremony , surmounting crowds not unlike those of the royal weddings . such a decision is a clear power move on his part , flexing the pure influence it would require to have such a public family life with no fear of repercussion from rivals or enemies .

it’s several months following their wedding that james is born , with nicholas taking a few years after . elite prep schools in the most posh london neighborhoods were abuzz with equal parts curiosity and concern to be sharing streets with the most feared mafia family in their whole country , though the elite nature of liam’s new societal presence meant he took to his ‘ dealings ‘ with a but more subtlety than before his rise to power . something of a media frenzy , it’s the talk of the town when marissa falls pregnant another time , nearly a decade after nicholas’s birth , this time with a baby girl , something that’s all the sun and mirror can seem to post about in their celebrity tabloids section for weeks on end . her birth raises questions of immense speculation : what will the world do with a greystone girl ?

as it would result , they’d worship her . stevie found herself raised in a world that sought her out at every turn , cameras pointed towards her at every outing . james and nick , now teens by the time she enters primary and just as big of terrors as their father , view their lavish lifestyle as the result of some bigger destiny for greatness , as their father had always fed to them , something they passed on to their baby sister who took it as her mantra . one of the earliest manifestations of a rather intense personality , stevie takes this to an extreme , turning her unwanted stardom into a fuel for an ever-increasing god complex to develop . the apple of her father’s eye and every bit as quick , her instructors note a dedication to perfection and an obsession with accomplishment , along with a natural intelligence that leads her to blast through her studies with relative ease .

she’s just 16 when she completes her schooling and already has a reputation that will precede her , just as her surname had before . relaxed and observant , her voice never peaks higher than a low alto with her charming londoner drawl , a facade never cracking from her knowing poker face . there’s something about being so above everyone ( even if it is a self-imposed superiority ) that leads stevie all but to the brink of isolation , finding solace only in the words of a self-deluded father and her own scribings in a leather bound notebook . piano lessons since early childhood lend themselves to melodies following melodies , and before she’s even able to legally drink , she’s released her first album under the moniker ‘ grey ’ titling it pure heroine as a cheeky nod to the inevitable accusations of it being her family ties that got her a record deal . but as streams of the melancholy tunes begin to pick up fans worldwide , the album’s themes of isolation , abandonment , and wasted youth hit harder than ever anticipated from the youngest greystone . she leaves home to tour the world with the album reaching #1 in countless countries , forging her own path with a maturity beyond her years and a vision beyond this world .

the tour ends and she’s smitten by the charm of new york , opting to move to continue to pursue her music away from the tangled complications of family life in england . barely 18 and perhaps intoxicated with the loneliness of a life spent in the watching eye of others , the semblance of privacy is something she takes to like an addict , exasperating prying paparazzi with her notorious refusal to comment on details of her personal life . she builds a wall between herself and the world , keeping out prying eyes with a tight - lipped grin . its at this time that she lets the first person into her life perhaps ever , a whirlwind romance so intoxicating it results in a courthouse marriage done in secret . never to be seen together , never a word spoken to anyone else , stevie relishes in the secret which is soon to sour upon the passing of their honeymoon phase . with her brothers expanding their reach into the US for their unsavory dealings , it’s not long after her marriage begins that the conflicts reach a breaking point , an annulment following barely 6 months after they had traded ‘ i do’s . ’

she takes to the studio with a new resentment of the concept of love and even more sequestered heart , producing melodrama which takes the world by storm , snagging her a grammy win for album of the year . fatigued from the constant go-around of keeping her secrets her own except for when they’re taken to radio streams , she does a limited tour for melodrama and lands herself right back in new york at 20 , putting grey3 on the backburner as she takes to all the hedonistic engagements she had indulged herself in during her time on tour . she’s kept herself busy between mindless flings and days-long benders with hobbies such as photography and writing , the former of which is building her a rather impressive reputation in the arts world .

𝒊𝒊. 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒆𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒏𝒄𝒆 .

if y’all ain’t tired of me yet god bless u . .. . bc i straight up b tired of myself :/

anyways dis is stevie , also accepts grey the same way ppl talk abt lorde n switch between ella n lorde ! she’s not picky :~)

major inspos are matty healy from the 1975 n hayley kiyoko if she was less of a try hard . little bit of kristen stewart in there , big 2016 ruby rose energy n brie larson top me tomfoolery as well !

basically da fuckboi of ur dreams .. .. . lil devilish londoner who stays thinkin she’s the closest thing to a god on this green earth !

notably , she’s incredibly intelligent and profound , tends to take on a rather patronizing and condescending tone bc she straight up b thinkin she’s usually the smartest person in the room ( how annoying )

so laid back n observant , rlly has no need to raise her voice ever bc her arguments b runnin circles around ppl ! imagine the way harry styles talks low n slow n calculated. . . . . cameron from love is blind ,. .. . kristen stewart lowkey sometimes .. .. .. das grey . sexy ass alto monotone 🤤🤤

i dont wanna use chaotic bc she rlly isnt the WILDEST bitch but that god complex means she deadass thinks she can get away w what she wants n she usually does ? less of a chaotic evil n more like a neutral evil lmao she can follow rules just fine she jsut prefers whatever suits her better

on that note — OBSCENELY self obsessed . follows her own natural whims n impulses bc that’s just what appeals to her . is inclined to follow rules if she calculates itll work in her favor bc she also doesn’t like to look sloppy !

super secretive and OBSESSED w her presentation . every movement is calculated n she doesnt want anyone seeing a side of her that she hasn’t designated for them ! she doesn’t care what other ppl think but she DOES care abt what she sees herself doing n her vision . doesnt fit the vision ? will NOT happen in her book .

straight up a WHORRE lmao she likes 2 fill the void left by a lack of human connection w sexual intimacy n then is like nice imma have u leave now love LMAO . does not discriminate and is rlly inclined to follow any sexual impulse

this was implied but her relationships are super messy ? does the leonardo dicaprio thing where she will never fuckin discuss her love life in interviews or anything so ppl just gotta SPECULATE . she lets ppl post all they want abt her but she wont say a WORD abt them JWHEKJWH her socials r basically just abt her n her music we said SELFISH lads . she’s bad @ bein tied down n is probs polyamorous as it stands but im p sure she has cheated on every single person she has ever been with lmao

lowkey a shit friend most of the time lMAO she can b really unreliable bc u guys can have plans n then she takes someone home n misses yalls plans n then texts u 4 hours later after all ur missed calls n is like my bad bruv i got tied up AS IF THAT FIXES IT KWEJKWJEKWE

chain smoker n its nastie but lowkey sexy somehow :/ , will ONLY wear outfits that r equal parts thrifted n designer , always has her hands in her pockets n if her jacket has a hood its UP like a big ole homo , is rlly annoying bc shes good looking n KNOWS it so she uses it to her advantage , wants 2 get her motorcycle license , judges u based off the music u play in the car , judges u on everything tbh.

#wealthyhq:intro #* ╰ . 𝒔 . 𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒚𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒏𝒆 . › introduction .#sorry 4 dis trash hittin the dash 🥰#just COULD NOT wait n format any longer

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yayninjabob · 4 years

Text

Author Commentary

Ramblings from Yay Ninja Bob about her monstrous creation~

Besides working on my fic, I personally try to journal every day, and I realized that a lot of my journaling has become me pretty much rambling about the process of writing this damn fic lol. So I thought I'd share some of that for those who may want to know more behind my chapters from my author's perspective.

It's certainly not everything I can say, but it is a lot haha..

Chapter 1 - Thirteen

Behind the title:

Well, when I first began writing VillainR, I hadn't planned on having chapter titles at all. Mainly because coming up with chapter titles (or titles for stories in general) has always been something I struggle with personally. Anywho after I decided I wanted to challenge myself with chapter titles, I went back and named chapter 1 "Thirteen." Why? Well, it is the PpG's thirteenth birthday, of course there is that. VillainR as a whole is many things, but one major thing is it is a coming of age story for Buttercup/Joey/Jojo, as well as a story of self-discovery. There's a few important ages I wanted to cover and 13 is around the age where many kids start to "develop" and being a super-powered kid, Buttercup finally begins to develop her own "special power" at this age. I wanted this "growing pain" to be the catalyst for the events of Part One. So, I gave the chapter the title of "Thirteen" to try to highlight the significance of that age for Buttercup. The self-discovery made at this age is that special power (although they are unaware of it at this point). It's considered an unlucky number, and as it turns out, it is an unlucky year for our main character.

During the writing process:

First draft was written on Halloween night 2019 and pretty much all of it was completely scrapped haha.

I started writing it in first person, like the original Villain, in Buttercup's POV. I kept the events but approached it again in third person and liked it so much better that way. One major thing I wanted to improve on with the rewrite was character development which is pretty hard to achieve when writing in a limited POV of a character who eventually loses sight of much around them. I debated briefly on maybe doing alternating POVs between Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup, but then I felt like it would still exclude a lot for other major characters like Mojo and Princess. I could add them too but I thought alternating too many POVs would be overwhelmingly difficult (for me as the author for sure but I imagine for the reader too) Third person seemed to be the best way to handle everything and really my only challenge with that was tweaking the whole "unreliable narrator" trope which I will be honest is my favorite trope ever. It is a challenge to try to recreate the same effect in third person, but I decided that a close third person was the best way to 1) tell a broader story and 2) still set limits on the reader's perspective, and control when and how I drop information and attempt to recreate a similar experience in an entirely new way I've never tried before heh. (I guess I will spend more time on this on my notes for Chapter 6)

Second draft I scribbled out in another few days with this new approach. It began at the start of the carnival and ended where it ends. Simultaneously I was reworking my overall outline for the fic and began to narrow down all the characters I wanted to be my key players for this epic. Once my outline was expanded to include everyone, I added the scene with Mojo and Him. For me, that's when I was like "Ayyy it's all coming together 👍👍" haha.

Another thing I wanted to improve on was setting and world-building. So final draft I decided to include some "history" behind Townsville and that's when I worked out the final draft.

This chapter definitely had the most trial and error during the writing process than any other chapter other than 5 so far.

Inspirations:

Townsville world-building/history - much of it is inspired by the city I grew up in (for the most part) which is Los Angeles. I mean it has all the sort of settings we've seen in the show which are all pretty diverse right? Townville had to have a diverse cityscape ranging from a busy downtown setting to quite suburbs to upperclass mansions, beaches, an island, forests, etc. Well I knew LA had all that and so I tried to re-imagine Townsville as basically an alternate universe LA lol. Monster Isle, I based on research I did on Catalina Island. I imagined the Utonium household was in a middle class neighborhood like Pasadena- close to the heart of LA but still a relatively "calmer" part of the city. Morbucks Manor would be in the Hills like Beverly Hills. Downtown was the heart of the city like Downtown LA. I debated briefly whether or not to have the Gangreen Gang be from an area modeled after South Central or East LA, but eventually I went with East LA because TBH I am just more familiar with it since that's where my mom's side is from and where I grew up early on in life. PLUS East LA actually has a pretty big punk scene so that fit the story too with Ace being in a punk band and all that.

1998 PpG Show References:

"Oh my gosh they have giant Bunny-Bunny's at the prize tent!"

(Super Zeroes)

Pop Culture References:

(OK most of my pop culture refs are just punk references lets be honest lol. Why Punk?? - because it is rebellion and rebellion is the heart of this fic)

The Clash - OK in original Villain I established that this was Buttercup's favorite band so I HAD to have that back for the redux. Here's all the refs I crammed into chapter 1 lol:

"Oh, Man! It's so hard to choose, like, I love literally everything by them. But I gotta say it's a tie probably between their first album and London Calling."

"Hell yeah. Jimmy Jazz is my jam."

youtube

"You know, my band does a cover of White Riot," Ace continued to talk music with the teenager as he lit his cigarette and took a deep drag. He held the smoke in his lungs as he continued, "Only we call our version Green Riot."

youtube

Blondie:

The one artist Buttercup had introduced Robin to that she instantly obsessed over was Blondie.

(Some) Symbolism:

- Blossom is 5'9" and Buttercup is 5'8" - Buttercup is always falling one step behind Blossom.

- Bumper Car scene - has some foreshadowing and well...

Blossom sat behind the wheel of a red bumper car at the opposite end of the metal floored rink. Buttercup crossed her arms in protest, "No way. I'm driving." she demanded.

Blossom also crossed her arms from where she sat behind the metal wheel. "So you can just rampage and crash into everybody here? No way." She fastened her seat belt with a quick snap and placed her hands firmly on the steering wheel again.

"Ugh. That's the whole point of bumper cars! It's to bump the other cars! You're supposed to try and bump everyone before the times up!"

"You always take it too far, Buttercup. I'm driving, so get in." The redhead grasped the steering wheel in her hands firmly, and refused to move.

And...

"You drive like an old lady," Buttercup shook her head in disbelief as her sister managed to avoid yet another collision.

"Well, that's your opinion," she shrugged off the insult, "Personally, I think it takes just as much skill to avoid every single car in here, as it does to hit every single car," she smiled at her sister.

And finally a brief allusion to the OG Villain lol...

"Blossom!" Buttercup shouted louder so she could get her sister's attention. She pointed at the fast approaching purple car that zoomed towards them from their right side. Behind the wheel of that car was Bubbles who wore a rather determined look on her face as Robin cheered for her.

Blossom saw, but by then it was too late. Bubbles and Robin's car slammed into Buttercup and Blossom's car at full force, spinning Buttercup and Blossom's car into the wall of the arena. The loud buzz which signified the end of the ride then sounded.

- the roller coaster is Buttercup's ideal carnival attraction; it's got the thrills, twists, turns, ups and downs. And makes Bubbles sick.

- the Ferris Wheel is Blossom's ideal carnival attraction; it's a staple of any fair, grand and big, overlooks everything, and traditionally romantic

YNB's favorite scene:

Personally, I loved writing the whole exchange between Buttercup and Blossom in the car. Establishing their rivalry, Buttercup's jealousy over Blossom's special power and heroism, Blossom's projection of her own insecurities, their differences, and their commonality.

Final thoughts on the chapter:

I was pretty satisfied with how it turned out but I did wait to post it until I had a decent headstart on chapter 2. I was pretty nervous about whether or not I could stay personally committed to writing this fic so I just wanted to make sure I was really feeling it first, lol. It had been so long since I'd written fanfic so I just needed to be sure.

When I outlined everything I estimated the chapter length to be around 6-7k words... And I was surprised that it was double that at about 12k. Which was wild because on my outline each opening chapter for Part 1, 2 and 3 were supposed to be shorter and more like preludes to everything else. Well, I guess they ARE shorter chapters but STILL definitely longer than any chapter I used to write for my multichaptered stories. At the time I thought "Ok obviously my writing has changed but surely I wont go much longer than 12k for future chapters...." Hurr hurr.

Personally, I was pretty proud of myself for spending so much time on it and rewriting it over and over and all that. In the past, TBH whatever was my first draft was pretty much also my last draft haha. I cranked out a chapter in one sitting usually and edited it mayyyybeee lol. I just wanted to get it posted so I could move on and get to that next point in the story. But I suppose now that I'm older and a bit more self aware, I realize a lot of my own anxieties manifest a lot in my writing though and I can recognize it in my old works like the OG Villain where I JUST WANNA GET TO WHAT I WANT TO WRITE RIGHT NOW OK?? I forced myself to slow the hell down this time, take it one scene at a time, and when things felt off I took breaks, slept on it for a few days and came back with new approaches or ideas. And so far that's how I continue to work on it.

Also, CHVRCHES. I listened to a ton of that band while working on this chapter especially.

#villainr #ppg fanfic #yayninjabob #behindthescenes #writing process #chapter 1 #let me know if you guys like this kinda stuff and I'll continue for the other chapters #commentary #author stuff

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asexualastarion · 4 years

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For the album ask game... how about The Black Parade?

oh ABSOLUTELY. i LOVE you. this is all subject to change at the drop of the hat bc im wishy-washy and i love all of these songs anyway so

this got WAY too long so i am putting it under a readmore shhvkldlkdgjlkdsj

not including b-sides:

1. Teenagers- kind of a basic pick i know, BUT, in my defense, the song slaps. it’s such a fun song, especially when you’re singing it at the top of your lungs. the guitar part is super cool too- im trying to learn it rn but it’s a slow process bc im bad at guitar.

2. Mama- what can i say. it fucks. the old time-y feel, the harmonies/background vocals, the layers. the guitar goes so fucking hard. banging lyrics- “you should’ve raised a baby girl, i should have been a better son”??????? songs to be trans to.”but the shit that i’ve done with this fuck of a gun” is the kind of lyric that you can only properly convey if you’re screaming it at the top of your lungs. the whole ending is just. mind blowing

3. The End.- LISTEN!!!!!!!!! the end is WAY TOO FUCKING UNDERRATED!!!! oh my goddd i love it so much. i love it SO much. it’s such a perfect beginning to the song. the lyrics are great (”now come one, come all, to this tragic affair” if you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, you can find out first hand what it’s like to be me”, “another contusion, my funeral jag. here’s my resignation, i’ll serve it in drag. you’ve got front row seats to the penitence ball, when i grow up, i want to be NOTHING AT ALL!!! SAVE ME!!! GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!!! SAVE ME!!! TOO YOUNG TO DIE, AND MY DEAR!!! IF YOU CAN HEAR ME JUST WALK AWAY AND TAKE ME!!). the bit with the snapping and the ooooohs is fun too. such a good song, it could honestly be 1 or 2 but my ranking system isnt based in logic and makes no sense to even myself

4. House of Wolves- house of wolves was my favorite mcr song for a good chunk of time, but as a result i’m kinda burned out on it, which is why it isn’t higher. however it is still number four because it’s objectively a fucking amazing song. the guitar is so fuckin fun, the lyrics are great, and it’s just. fun to dance around and sing it at the top of your lungs. you better run like the devil cause they’re never gonna leave you alone!!!!! tell me i’m a bad, bad, bad, bad man!!!

5. Welcome to the Black Parade- the big man itself. the titular song. their biggest hit. a lot of people shit on wttbp for being popular and, like, pretty much the only song of theirs to ever be on the radio anymore (and even then it’s once in a blue moon), BUT. it got popular for a reason. it’s a really good song. i love the structure of it, i love how it builds and builds and builds. the lyrics are wonderfully done- “a world that sent you reelin from decimated dreams/ your misery and hate will kill us all”, the whole “do or die, you’ll never make me” stanza is The Ultimate rallying cry. and the “im just a man, i’m not a hero” is just. ughghghdlkslakdjglsdkg. the titular song of an album entirely about death and dying and misery being SO hopeful and SO upbeat really portrays the album as a whole much differently- mcr is known as The Emo Band because, yeah, their aesthetic is dark and their songs touch dark stuff but they have never been all whiney and boo-hoo-y and melancholic for the sake of melancholy. there’s always been a positive note to their music and a lot of people just don’t get that which makes me sad. anyway. wttbp is fun and i like it and i like the drums and the trumpets at the end. marching bands fuck

6. Blood- ok so the pattern here seems to be that i favor the fun songs over the slow ones, and blood sticks with that. much like with mama, i love the old time-y feel. i love that this is like a fun little bonus ditty to end the album on. the lyrics are silly and fun and jovial, and the piano is great. love it and it makes me happy

7. Disenchanted- OUGHH. OUUUUUGH. i know cancer is objectively the saddest song on the album, but disenchanted just hits different. “when the lights all went out, we watched our lives on the screen/ i hate the ending myself, but it started with an alright scene” just DECIMATES me, man. the acoustic guitar is a nice change of pace, and the vocal performance is just. so fucking emotional. especially the “woahhhhhhhh-ohs” at the end. great song, makes me Feel Emotions

8. The Sharpest Lives- ok so i know this is pretty much in the middle of the list, but i want to stress that i dont hate any of the songs on this album, so even the middle of the list is pretty fuckin good imo. the sharpest lives makes me go batshit. the lyrics are so fucking wild. “a light to burn all the empires, so bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be” is SO fuckin sick like OH my god. what a line. also “there’s a place in the dark where the animals go/ you can take off your skin in the cannibal glow/ juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands/ drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, romeo” like WHAT?????????????? GERARD POPPED OFF W THIS ONE FOLKS!! also i love how at the beginning the whisper-y vocals bounce from ear to ear. also “so why don’t you blow me......a kiss before she goes” is fuckin hilarious. honestly this song should be higher but i havent gone through a phase where i’ve been obsessed w it yet so it stays down here for now. one day it will take hold and be all i can listen to for a month straight and THEN it will climb the ranks.

9. Cancer- makes me cry like a liddol baby. my mom doesnt let it play in the car cause it makes her too sad. twenty one pilots covered it and it was FUCKING AWFUL so the song is kinda ruined now cause i can only think about their shitty cover. like the AUDACITY. but anyway besides that the song is heart wrenching and amazing. the hardest part of this is leavin you!!!!

10. Dead!- look, i know technically the end. and dead! are the same song/ are just continuations of each other but i’m listing them separately bc dead! is, to me, the worse of the two. not that it’s bad or anything, it just doesn’t pop off the same way the end. and all the songs before it on the list do. however i do love the guitar at the beginning and the solo, and the “one! two! one two three four! LA LA LA LAs” are super fucking fun.

11. Famous Last Words- i used to hate this song!!!! i truly did!! it’s obvs not on the top of my list now or anything, but i have grown to appreciate it a lot more than i used to. like with wttbp, it is the silver lining of the album that betrays its optimistic side. it’s a happy final message to a dark album. the ending is fucking amazing. I am not afraid to keep on living!!!! i am not afraid to walk this world alone!!!!!!

12. Sleep- Sleep is, unfortunately, just kinda boring in comparison. i almost forgot to even put it on the list. however, i do like the “the hardest part’s the awful things that i’ve seen” and the “a drink, for the horrors that i’m in. for the good guys and the bad guys, for the monsters that i’ve been” lines. also the “three cheers for tyranny, unapologetic apathy!” line. but overall it’s just. eh

13. This is How I Disappear- i have. complicated feelings on tihid. on one hand, it reminds me of my favorite oc, re, and is on their playlist. on the other hand, i have grown bored with it over time. it just doesn’t stand out to me at all really. that being said, i do really like the “who walks among the famous living dead” and the “can you hear me cry out to you” stanzas.

14. I Don’t Love You- while i dont think idly is a bad song at all, it just simply isnt my kind of song. i do think gerard’s vocals are extremely strong throughout, especially during the “when you go, would you have the guts to say/ i don’t love you like i loved you yesterday” line. like wow ok maam please continue. but overall i just dont vibe w breakup songs bc i cant relate

including b sides: 1. Heaven Help Us

2. Kill All Your Friends

3. Everything else

4. My Way Home is Through You

my reasoning:

heaven help us is tied for my favorite mcr song Of All Time. everything about this song is catnip for lil old me. the angsty christian imagery, the vocals, the guitar. all of it. the lyrics make me lose my mind, especially the “will you pray for me? or make a saint of me? and will you lay for me? or make a saint of- cause i’ll give you all the nails you need/cover me in gasoline/ wipe away those tears of blood again/ and the punchline to the joke is asking ‘SOMEONE SAVE US’” and the “you don’t know a thing about my sins/ or the misery begins/ you don’t know, so i’m burnin! I’m burnin!!!” parts. like i absolutely vibe with this song so fucking hard. i sing it constantly, it’s great to sing (very stimmy for me), it sounds beautiful. i am obsessed with it through and through

similarly, kill all your friends also speaks to my very soul. i can’t pick favorite lyrics bc id just have to copy and paste the whole song. i love the build-up, i love the time progression throughout the song (it’s been TEN FUCKING YEARS since i’ve been seein your faaaaaace rounnnnnd heeeere), i love the “you’ll never take me alives”. literally everything about this song makes me emo. it just Gets Me. it’s literally about my greatest fear. all my friends growing up and moving away and getting on with their lives without me, leaving me to rot in my hometown waiting for them to return. we only see each other at weddings and funerals, so it’s time to kill all your friends so we can party when the funeral ends!! it’s probably tied with heaven help us, but i’m putting it at number two just because it didn’t hook me as strongly as hhu did. it’s more of a strong, steady favorite than a “this song has latched on to my very soul and i have to listen to it on repeat over and over and over again”, if that makes sense. it’s still in my top 5 mcr songs though

i never vibed with my way home is through you. i don’t listen to it often, and i just don’t really feel it. it’s not bad, it’s just. eh.

anyway if you’ve read this far down i love you so much. thank you for listening to me ramble, mcr means a lot and i love to infodump about my music tastes. i really really appreciate being given an opportunity to do so <3

#mcr #asks #anon #SERIOUSLY. ILY. MWAH.

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