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bangtan-dreamland · 4 years

Text

the crying closet

Prompt: “I work at this library and for the past couple nights I’ve had to kick you out of the crying closet at closing time. Normally I wouldn’t pry, but do you want to talk about it?”

Pairing: knj x reader

Word Count: 5.2K

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: Just some cursing!! okay and maybe the horrendous format and the unimaginative title lmao

Genre: Fluff, a smidge of angst, meet-cute, college!au

AN: A big thank you to our lovely @mygsii for reading and telling me that this is cute and fluffy!!! I will hold on to her words and hope that someone smiles reading this ^^

┈ ✁✃✁✃✁✃✁✃✁ ┈

today was nOT your day. or week. or month now that you think about it

usually you have your shit together. there are a lot of reasons to. for one, you’re a scholar student! you’re smart! and hardworking! even if you have your moments of dumbassness you somehow still manage to stay afloat. you never get a grade below 90 and that’s already with the highest your professor giving is 96. It may take you minutes before the deadline bUT you always, ALWAYS manage to pass your stuff! and yeah you may have a procrastination problem but you’re workING on that SO

actually nevermind it’s a miracle you have your shit together most days

which

this month has really tested now that you remember it all

to start, the dreaded group project. the semester just started, and your professors are already giving you students sO MUCH WORK TO DO which okAY fine you’re used to that how would you get your grades if you don’t give them things to grade on

BUT A GROUP PROJECT??? YOU DON’T KNOW EVEN KNOW MOST OF THESE PEOPLE NOT EVEN THEIR NAMES

AND YOUR PROFESSOR WANTED YOU TO WORK WITH THEM

okay, okay you thought you could handle this

nevermind your bad history with group projects people in college are mature right thEY HAVE TO BE RIGHT at least please be mature enough to help in a group project for their own fuCKING grades

wELL JOKES ON YOU

it started off well enough you made a group chat added them in

made introductions

it was awkward but whatever people normally are when they’re new to each other right

BUT

then you start talking about dividing the work and they’re all ‘cOOL YEAH WE KNOW WE GOT IT’

so you’re like ‘oh! okay! I trust you guys then’

BUT THEN DAYS PASS AND YOU FIND OUT

they still

haven’t

even

fucking

started

you’d never considered murder as a viable option to remove stress but you were very much considering it then

especially when they made the most ridiculous excuses

like getting sick (you literally saw her post about gOING TO A LUNCH WITH HER FRIENDS what the fuck even did she not remember you know her account wHAT A BITCH)

or getting swamped with other schoolwork (you saw him on a date with his girlfriend the fuck was he talking about ‘schoolwork’ your ass)

or the worst- his grandma died and he was away on her funeral (you don’t even know how he thought that was a reasonable excuse like literally you see him in cLASS)

so then you had to do the project all by yourself

really considered just telling the professor that you wanted to work alone

bUT NO!!!!

apparently you’re too soft or whatever,,,

plus your professor said you can’t

you think it’s because he knows your classmates will fail if you don’t do their share of the work

but it’s not like you can say that to your teacher or you’d get

wait do colleges have detention they don’t they have strikes right

aNYWAYS

so you did the project alone!!! AND YOU COMPLETED IT!!! amazing!!!!

BUT THE FUCKING KICKER WAS THAT

because of all the stress and sleep you lost over the project

gUESS WHO FLUNKED HER QUIZ

which!!!

okay so it may seem important or anything

but your professor was only giving 3 quizzes this semester

THREE

THAT MADE UP FOR LIKE 40% OF YOUR GRADE FOR WRITTEN OUTPUTS

AND YOU FLUNKED!!! IT!!!!!

just remembering it makes you want to scream honestly

and now!!! that it’s almost exams week!!!!

you were called to the office to say that your scholarship is in trouble!!!!

because apparently the quiz added with other stuff you missed because of all the things you’ve been busy doing hAS LOWERED YOUR POSSIBLE GRADES TO JUST ABOVE THE LINE

that’s already if you acE THE EXAms

if you don’t????

well

goodbye scholarship

lastly

your parents called

...

need there be more explanation

you won’t even go into detail about your string of bad luck experiences

coming to a class late, missing notes from your bag, a missent email, even in your fucking part time job you can’t catch a break something will go wrong and you just

you want to cry just thinking about it really…

you’ve been trying

sO HARD!!!

you’re not exactly the nicest or kindest person sURE

but you don’t think you deserve this

maybe you really are just going through an unlucky streak

right now even though you should be studying for exams you opened your book and started crying 3 minutes in when you couldn’t focus because of how stressed you were

which isn’t good because

college books are fucking expensive

so here you are currently

in your school’s crying closet

which is just a set of stalls that have plushie animals

honestly though not even the plushies are helping you feel better

really you don’t know if anything will

you startle when you hear a male’s voice ring through the intercom

“Attention, to all students still remaining… we’ll be closing the library in around ten minutes, kindly put the books in the carts or check them out.”

wow. was it really eight o’clock already??? had you really spent four hours just crying your heart out???

apparently you did

you listen to the reluctant groans and sighs, students chattering as they all started leaving

anD YOU WOULD TOO you honestly would come out and leave

but god you feel too embarrassed to even take a step outside

you’re just gonna wait until they’re all gone yEP

you close the door veeeery softly, sniffle and rock yourself on your knees

but like

you must have been more tired than you thought

because the next thing you know is there’s someone talking to you and you didn’t notice them AT ALL

“Good evening- you’ve been here a long time. Are you… okay? Wait- shit, sorry, that was insensitive.”

you sniffle because uh duh why else would you be in the crying closet if you were okay

there’s a long period of silence and you wonder if whoever it is went away

when

you hear whoever it is clear their throat before speaking again

“I… see you sometimes come in here,” he reveals and you feel more and more like you just want to lock the door and nEVER come out

“Oh.”

“It isn’t that I’m ridiculing you or something, so don’t even start thinking about that for a moment. Just…” you hear him give a frustrated sigh before he continues speaking, voice softer. “Maybe it’s weird, but… I want to help. You’re here almost every day so I assume you have something heavy in your life going on right now, and… I can’t promise that I’ll be able to empathize with you, but I can listen.” you can hear the wry smile on his face even as he speaks. “And if you’re worried about me knowing your secrets, I will promise you that I don’t even know your name, and we can keep it like that. Though you could probably easily know mine since I’m a stable fixture here. Kim Namjoon.”

“Wow,” you sniffle. “That sounded like it came straight from a novel.”

he laughs. it helps break the tension, you’re pretty happy he took your joke well.

“You’re not the first to say that to me,” he jokes, before his voice turns serious again. “But I’m serious about it, you know.”

you think over your choices. what else did you have? it’s not like you could just keep crying everyday over how stressed you were over the exams, and then get stressed because you couldn’t study because you’re crying

and for some reason you trust this man. which seriously stranger danger but you know that he wouldn’t hurt you that way. for some reason.

and. truthfully. you would appreciate a sympathetic ear at the moment.

so you start speaking

now look

let’s rewind a bit

Namjoon doesn’t usually do this for anyone else

lord knows he’s not as good at calming down crying girls than he is being a librarian

but

it’s almost been a full week

A WEEK

since you started using the crying closet almost exclusively and that won’t do because other students!!! need to use them too!!!!

and if it were any other utilities there’d be a riot

but

the crying closet has multiple stalls and the students who use them are sympathetic to each other

because if you use the closet you’ve really got to have it bad

and you’ve been using this particular stall for like a week straight now even if no one’s exactly seen who you are they all still feel bad for you

which Namjoon is really curious about

since

he knows you

well

not in a personal “we’re friends” or even “we’re acquaintances and we talk sometimes”

he means like he sees you a lot in the library

you’re always walking in with the most determined aura he’s seen!

like you’re on the way to write up an essay on how to destroy people

or something like that

you always seem so put together that Namjoon

maybe

admires you a little more than he should

but you always seem like you’re too busy to give anyone your time and he never has any time either

being a librarian isn’t just standing and reading books behind the counter like it is in novels okay

not to mention the size of the library he manages

LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN THE AMOUNT OF BOOKSHELVES THERE ARE

not to mention tHE AMOUNT OF STUDENTS THAT USE THE LIBRARY

no he doesn’t just do them all by himself but s t i l l

wait he’s getting off point

so he’s never talked to you

he doesn’t think you even know he exists beside being librarian A

BUT he remembers a lot of little things about you

like the way you like to fiddle with your hair when you’re thinking

or when you take one too many books that he doesn’t think you actually need for your class just for entertainment value

but then you never read it and just return it

or the way you always go to what he has deemed ‘your spot’ by now

perfect spot hidden by the corners where there’s enough light but at the same time hidden away by the bookshelves so there’s privacy

there’s also the other little things you do he notices

the way you’re always on your laptop or phone for one, typing or doing something probably important (the truth is that you’re either on your social media or reading fanfiction but he doesn’t learn that until later on)

or- if you find reading something boring or dry you slouch a little, until your chin is resting on the table and your arms are outstretched and you’re halfway stretching on the table yourself with the cUTEST LITTLE POUT ON YOUR MOUTH AND A FURROW ON YOUR FACE that honestly he’d like to kiss away-

ahem

anyway

the point is that he likes you but you never seem like you’re interested in anything other than your books

he’s never even seen anyone come up and talk to you

it’s like you have this wall that keeps you away from everyone else!!!

so the fact that you ever even went to a crying stall is a big surprise for him

and he would have approached you the first night but you already snapped at someone for asking after you and he doesn’t want to get your wRATH

… but

it’s been almost a week and the stalls really are in hot demand

he’s decided he has to talk to you tonight

maybe he’ll get lucky and you’ll confide in him and he can strike a friendship with you!!!

or at least just talk with you

when he remembers that Namjoon steels his courage

and

when he sees you head straight for your stall again early afternoon

he gives himself one final chance

but then

it’s closing time and you still aren’t out

oh god what if you fell asleep inside he has to lock the library he’d be locking you iN THE LIBRARY

so he can do this

he knocks gently on the door

for a long time

so you understand he’s not going away

he doesn’t just want to start speaking to you out of nowhere he god you’d probably feel like strangling him

no answer

bUT he does hear someone shift and the sniffles stop (which have been a bit loud considering the two of you are the only ones left in the library)

he coughs and starts speaking

wait what does he say he can’t just tell you he wants out of the stall

“Good evening- you’ve been here a long time now. Are you… okay? Wait- shit, sorry, that was insensitive.”

wow nice way to go Joon you kILLED IT

in a bad, messy, horRENDOUS WAY

so he starts to tell you about why he came over

and

honestly

while he hadn’t come talk to you for anything other than coaxing you out of the stall

he’s surprised to find you’re pretty cute, if not a bit blunt

and really stressed which is a given

he didn’t think you would honestly he thought you’d be sharp and snide to him

but

as it turns out, you’ve just had a really bad two weeks

he can’t help but feel for you because he can relate to everything you’ve been going through

he won’t go into detail but doing a thesis on your own alongside keeping high grades fucking sucks and it doesn’t help that he’s a perfectionist

but back to you

the two of you have spent about what seems to be half an hour now

twenty minutes in you finished telling him about your recent problems

(“I kind of want to just self-explode or something. maybe throw myself out a window.”)

(“I don’t think that’s going to solve your problems, just create more of them.”)

(“THANK you for pointing that out Namjoon isn’t it funny I actually believed that would work for me.”)

anyway afterwards you fell silent and he really didn’t want to push you

but then he hears you sniffle again

“Aren’t you going to tell me off?”

“What for?”

he hears you huff, and it’s easy to imagine the pout on your face he really does want to kiss it away more than ever now

“Well,” you start, before pausing. “I mean when I think about it it isn’t really that bad, right? Everyone goes through something like this. Group projects and all that bad luck. I’ve just been having a little bit more, but. I’m already falling apart.”

he frowns, even more when he hears you scoff at yourself.

“Don’t say that,” he chides you. “It’s not about if it’s that bad compared to other people. It doesn’t affect them. It affects you. If you feel bad about it and you want to cry, it isn’t anyone’s business but yours. Besides. This is that bad, because this- these problems you’re going through threaten things important to you.”

… did he say the right thing because hE CAN HEAR YOU CRYING AGAIN SHIT-

for a few moments he hears you crying, though he can sense you slowly get yourself together as your sniffles die down

then he hears the door creak open slowly and his heart goes to his chest.

he sees you tearily look up at him, your eyes red and raw from crying.

you hastily look down, self-conscious about the fact that really yOU’RE A MESS

your hair is a mess your clothes are a mess yoUR DAMN FACE IS A MESS

why did you just open the door oh god

for a moment you just keep your eyes on the ground before you hastily try to fix your appearance

“Um,” you start, timid. “Thank you for hearing me out. You didn’t have to.”

“I wanted to,” he tells you, before smiling a little. “Okay, I had to at first but then I wanted to.”

as he says this you see him patiently offer you a hand. you blush.

“I don’t think you need to walk me to the library entrance,” you mumble, but you take his hand anyway.

“I,” he pauses. “You said you’ve been stressed out, between studying at the library and studying at home so… I want to bring you someplace else.”

“Only if it’s okay with you, of course,” he amends quickly. “And by someplace else I just mean the park.”

you look at him surprised, but then hesitantly start walking with him. “Okay,” you acquiesce because really you’ll take anything just to be able to feel relief again. not to mention there are cameras all along the way plus one of those small police stations near the park, which you remember is also still a hot place for dates

… right? right

the two of you walk out of the library- Namjoon already did all the things he’s supposed to do before closing up, leaving confronting you for last which turns out to be a good thing

he hands you a bottle of water too- which really helps clear your headache

gOD CRYING SUCKS HELL also you should remember to bring water if you ever go into a crying fit

you’re going off into a tangent but seeing as you start feeling better already you deem the tangent important and remind yourself to note it down later

anyway as Namjoon tells you he leads you to the park near your university.

though truthfully told it’s not… exactly a park. parks mean grass and trees and wide open space

but the city officials went for cEMENT AND FAKE LIGHT UP FLOWErs and building it by a bridge going down to near the river

the only sAVING thing about the park is that the trees are real and there are plenty of seats

aLSO there’s the fact that when it’s nighttime the flowers look kinda pretty

alongside the artifical waterfall they built.

anyways the two of you arrive there- surprisingly enough there are still a few people left

you thought you’d only feel tired if you came here

but surprisingly the fresh air and the cold night is helping you feel better

just a little

and then Namjoon tugs you over- he talks to one of the vendors still selling

it doesn’t take longer than a minute for him to get the two of you soup, specifically pares

you take a sip- not only is it just the right temperature bUT IT’S ALSO FUCKING DELICIOUS

another thing you’ve forgotten while crying- you’re really hungry

“I’m glad to see you’re smiling again,” Namjoon comments and ahahahah the soup is really hot isn’t it your cheeks are too warm right now

you nOISILY eat your food because otherWISE YOU’D HAVE TO TALK and damn it why is it that he even approached you

oh right you were hogging the damn stall

“I come here often during this time to relax, when there’s not much people around,” he tells you suddenly. you raise an eyebrow at him because why tell you that? you’re not that close and it sounds like a little thing he likes to keep to himself

“It’s the closest I can get to quiet amidst nature,” he continues. “It helps that there’s a river.”

he points at it- the river is pretty at this time of the night, with the sparkling lights reflected on it.

“When I get stressed I usually take a rock lying around, pretend it’s one of my problems, then throw it. Maybe skip it across the river.”

“And does it help?” you ask. Namjoon hums.

“For me it does. I know it doesn’t work for everyone… but I want you to try anyway. Maybe it will work for you too.”

at this point the two of you have finished your meals. although with you you’ve finished three servings. wHAT, you’re hungry okay??

anyway Namjoon leads you to the edge of the river- you’d be wary in any other situation but for one the two of you are still in the very visible sight of other people PLUS Namjoon hasn’t done anything bad to you so far and has been very kind and you trust him a little

he picks up a stone- you copy him, and then he just. quietly (okay there’s a hint of real frustration under it but if you aren’t yelling to get your problems off your chest is it even anything sO) throws the stone.

or so you think

because that damn stone skips all the way to the other side of the river which mind you is a huge thing because the river is aBOUT FIFTY METERS WIDE.

you look at the stone disappearing in the distance with huge, disbelieving eyes, then back to namjoon- who’s grinning silly at your expression and just.

“How,” you squint.

he giggles. you pout. look at the stone in your hands.

“I’m going to fucking make it.”

your first try: it sinks straight into the water. you say nothing bECAUSE IT’S THE FIRST ONE

then the second

third

fourth

fifth

you’re at what has to be either your ninth or tenth stone- at this point your record has to be 3 bounces aND STILL SO FAR from the damn edge you aren’t even halfway!!!

you pout, long and hard- Namjoon by your side has to bite his lips to keep himself from grinning way too wide. you’re really too cute. he doesn’t know how he ever thought you were intimidating!!

“Namjoon,” you almost whine but you don’t!!! you don’t whine at all and there’s nothing to whine about in your current situation!!! “How the fuck do you skip it across?”

“Practice, mostly,” he tells you. “That and I throw it as hard as I can- wait.”

Namjoon walks closer- you tense up when you fEEL HIM RIGHT BEHIND YOU oh god cute guy toO CLOSE

but Namjoon does nothing- asks “may I?” and you nod

“Pose like you’re going to throw the stone,” he tells you calmly. liar. you can’t hear it but Namjoon’s heart is beating like c r a z y you’re so close he could tilt his head downwards and he’d be burying his head in your hair and smell your shampoo!!

which smells really nice bUT THAT’S NOT THE POINT

you tilt back a little- stretch your arm back- okay, so mAYBE your arm is trembling a little you’re vERY VERY NERVOUS OKAY

but then

you feel Namjoon gently touch your arm- correcting your posture until

well

you actually can’t think that much

beside, you know

NAMJOON’S HANDS ON YOUR ARMS

more than that he adjusts your whole stance with his hand and oH GOD THE LIGHT TOUCHES ON YOUR BODY HOW IS THAT FAIR

thirsting!!! after other people!!!! is much easier when they don’t pull this shit!!!!!! thirsting is safer from a distance!!!

“You can throw it now.”

oh god you’re thirsting over Kim Namjoon

KIM NAMJOON THIS NERDY LIBRARIAN

“Y/N?”

uahsjdkasda

why did your brain make you realize that at this moment goOD GOD

you jUMP when you feel someone’s hand on your shoulder- oh wait it’s Namjoon

“You can throw the stone now,” he repeats, a grin on his face aND OKAY DUMB MOMENT

you internally scream in your head but outwardly you nod, immediately just throw the stone as hard as you can bECAUSE YOU CAN’T BELIEVE YOU JUST BLANKED OUT ON HIM

did he see you blush oh god you’d never live it down

here comes surprise number two

you should’ve listened to Namjoon’s instructions fully because

you may have thrown the stone but

you didn’t throw the stone towards and across the river

yOU THREW IT IN THE RIVER

guess what happens if you just throw a stone tilted downwards

if you guessed splash ring ding ding yOU WERE RIGHT

here you are

your clothes mildly wet

just the front

bUT STILL

if there was an option for the ground to swallow you right now you’d go for it hONESTLY

instead you drop to your knees and let out a long loud groan becAUSE YOU JUST CANNOT DEAL WITH LIFE OKAY

“That was so bad I don’t even know what to say,” you bemoan.

you hear him stifle a giggle, you pout again.

BUT THEN

you feel something warm and soft on your shoulder, then wrapped around you-

you look up aND SEE NAMJOON GAVE YOU HIS SWEATER WHAT EVEN-

“You can’t go home in wet clothes,” he explains, dimpled smile- holy shit he has dimples you never noticed that but wow they’re adorable!!!! “Though there isn’t exactly a place to change around here, but… the jacket will help shield you and your clothes from the cold.”

you sigh

okay yeah this evening has been down and then up and then down

“Let’s get you home,” he tells you, before pausing a little. “I, um- do you mind if I walk you to your car?”

you hesitate- but then acquiesce. “Okay,” you tell him.

walking back to your car- you’re surprised to find it’s ten o’clock already

had the two of you been at the park that long???

the passing cold air makes your hands a bit numb- the sweater is bIG on you but you rolled the sleeves up to your wrist at least because you cAN’T OPEN THE DOOR OR DRIVE IF THEY’RE COVERED CAN YOU

anyway you probably should’ve done that when you’re inside the car not walking to it yet

you decide to tough it out anyway it’s just a few minutes walk

you fiddle with your hair- your hands are itching to move but the silence is so damn awkward and your hands are cold too-

but

“May I?” Namjoon asks- you look at him, raise an eyebrow because what for? but he just looks at your hand- oh

you shrug and try not to show you’re blushing

Namjoon’s hand is- well, you’d like to say it’s warm. but it’s not. it isn’t like he’d been wearing gloves or anything, so both your hands are cold and a little clammy when you clasp hands together.

but the way it fucking makes your heart jump?

yeah

honestly you’d like to wax poetry about the moment right now- walking hand in hand!!! with this guy you may or may not find really cute and hot!!!! in the middle of the night!!!!!!

but let’s be real head empty no thoughts

except the way your heart beats one, two, a little too fast

arriving to your car suddenly feels all too soon

you don’t release your hands yet when you stop

it’s only when you’re about to get in that you reluctantly let your hands fall apart from each other

suddenly you miss his hands at least they were a little warm around the end (and okay it made you feel aLL WARM INSIDE too but shush)

“Have a safe trip home,” he tells you. you offer him a small smile.

“I will! Sorry for- um, earlier. And thank you. You didn’t have to,” you tell him, but he only smiles back at your words.

“I told you, I wanted to.”

you nod- suddenly scrambling for words. You didn’t want to go home yet, but.

“If you ever want to destress you can go back to the river.”

you blink.

“Are you sure? Isn’t that kind of like your special place?”

he really has the cutest dimples bUT wow he’s also hot as fuck, especially with what you dare hope to be a fliRTY SMILE.

“I don’t mind sharing it if it’s you I’m sharing with.”

oof

“Okay! Goodnight Namjoon! See you tomorrow!!”

your face is bright r e d

hightail it out of there fast

you can see him still grinning widely in the rear mirror and hnghhhh why are you also smiling so widely sheesh

the ride back is quiet

it’s only when you get home that you realize one thing though-

you’re still wearing his sweater

you foRGOT TO GIVE IT BACK

oh my god you also forgot he paid for your food yOU WERE SO OUT OF IT YOU DIDN’T EVEN NOTICE

you facepalm

wait you shouldn’t give the sweater back if it’s wet you have to wash it first

okay okay

you decide to bring him coffee tomorrow Namjoon seems like the type of person to drink coffee

(also it’s a good way to start a conversation with him bUT THAT’S ONLY A WHAT IF AND NOT YOUR MAIN GOAL OKAY)

okay!!!

you take a shower first, change your clothes, then decide to wash the sweater-

when

you see a small piece of paper fall out

‘if you need help with the exams, I’m free for tutoring in the morning from 10 a.m.. you can repay me by buying me food at the park after - kim namjoon’

you look at the other side

‘also, here’s my number in case you need it’

you stare at the string of numbers next to it-

that smooth motherfucker

‘I hope you know how to teach advanced calculus, because otherwise I’m not buying you food’

it doesn’t even take a full minute for the reply to come through

‘I’ll see you tomorrow at ten then for our date’

'*study date'

'though I suppose we can do the first too after exams if you're okay with it'

okay, so maybe this month is not quite yet the worst

and if things go right? maybe the next few months will be your best yet

#bangtanscenery #btswritersnet #bangtanhq #bts x reader #kim namjoon x reader #namjoon x reader #bts fic #bts imagines #bts scenarios

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halictus-writer · 4 years

Text

Welcome to Seattle (Ch. 3 of 5)

Remus deleted Tinder the second the app finished downloading. He was sitting at the dining table/desk combination of his studio apartment, and, unsurprisingly it was raining just outside the window. Seattle felt so new to Remus, although it had now been months since he moved away from his previous life. It took a lot of journaling and time, but he had begun to feel like what had happened–– his ex breaking his heart an hour before his twenty-sixth birthday party–– was meant to happen. His life hadn’t been his own. It was full of so much compromise, as is necessary for a life shared by two people, but the compromises that were made did not further his growth. He was stuck in a rut in his career, he was still in his college town, and he hadn’t even written a word of the novel he told himself he would write after the next big thing––graduation, holidays, birthdays, travel–– finished.

And now, here he was. Living in a big city, alone, but doing it the way he wanted. He had a job that furthered his growth, he had supportive friends, and he had already filled entire notebooks with the ideas, character charts, and plot diagrams that would eventually become his novel. Suddenly realizing that no one was here to complain about the cold, he cracked the window open, letting some of the fresh, rain-scented air in, and shrugged on a sweater.

He was at peace with himself, and for that reason he felt he was ready to give dating another shot. He re-downloaded Tinder, chose a few random pictures of himself, and typed out the bio that Dorcas had helped him draft, cringing the entire time. He closed the app without viewing the other Tinder users within twenty-five miles and two years of his age.

As a treat for his bravery, he decided to get a margherita pizza for lunch. If he exercised self-control, he could save half for tonight’s dinner as well. It was really a matter of simple economics.

***

Remus immediately noticed that the restaurant looked a little different in the midday light, but he also immediately noticed that Sirius was not on the clock. He ordered his pizza to-go.

As he walked back to his apartment, one hand tucking the pizza close, the other brandishing an umbrella, he tried not to think about the fact that he had so far only received free–– and unsolicited–– dessert items when Sirius was working.

***

An hour later, Remus had made his first matches on Tinder. He had also accidentally “super-liked” a person named “DL Top” with a gray image as their only picture, frantically looked up how you could “un-match” with someone, read a very patronizing how-to article on basic Tinder functions, and decided to choose “block” for good measure.

One of his matches was a graduate student at the University of Washington, and Remus liked that his profile said he loved to read. They exchanged normal greeting messages, before the man asked Remus if he was “a LTR kind of guy.” Remus answered him by saying “Tolkien is an amazing writer, obviously, but I have to admit the movies were kind of long.” The man didn’t reply, and Remus figured that his opinions on the Lord of the Rings franchise must have been a deal-breaker for the other man.

Dorcas and Marlene were adamant about hearing his progress with Tinder, so he sent a group text to the two of them.

Remus: Tinder day one is a thing, I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong yet

Dorcas: Yes! Proud of you

Marlene: what’s the weirdest thing that’s happened so far!!!!???

Remus: well, someone asked me what I thought about lord of the rings on the second message, does that count?

Dorcas: haha seriously? What did they even say

Remus: “so are you an LTR kinda guy or what?”

Marlene: HAHA

Dorcas explained that LTR in this context likely stood for “long-term relationship,” with intermittent texts from Marlene such as “how in the heck even” and “you are my favorite person oh my god.”

Remus decided to give Tinder a break for the rest of the day.

***

He made a good deal of progress within his first week of online dating, especially when considering that he started so low, with the misunderstanding of slang and accidental super-liking. It was now a Friday night, and he had a real-life, in-person date set for six o’clock. On Wednesday Remus had met a different match for coffee (but only after Dorcas had cross-referenced his story, friended him from a blank Facebook profile, and found pictures of him at his high school senior prom from nearly a decade ago. “You should be arrested,” Remus had said, horrified but a little grateful). Coffee had been perfectly pleasant, but both men agreed that they would rather be friends than anything more. They even friended each other on Facebook so that Remus could be added to his book club.

Meeting new friends was a welcome side-effect, but Remus was still in the market for a boyfriend. Hence, the anxious shuffling as he waited for the clock to get closer to six. Remus wished his apartment was larger, if only for the chance to have more space to clean. He had already Swiffered the floor, cleaned the bathroom mirror, and remade the bed, and it was still only a quarter past five. The cleaning was just for something to do with his hands and nerves, he knew that his date wouldn’t be seeing the inside of his apartment tonight. As per Dorcas’s prescriptions (and his own self-preservation), Remus’s first dates with strangers met online would take place completely in public.

At 5:45, a message from his upcoming date announced that he was being held a bit late at the office, and asked to reschedule for 6:30 instead of 6. Remus, wanting to be easy-going and amicable, kindly agreed, wishing him luck with his pressing work matters. Internally, however, he was frustrated that he had already taken the garbage out, since now there was absolutely nothing left to clean.

6:30 turned into 7:00, and by 7:15 Remus had taken his shoes off and was laying on the top of his neatly-made bed. The excuses changed from finishing at work, to a friend in need, to traffic, and Remus was beginning to consider just preemptively cancelling it himself.

At 7:45, the match asked if they could just skip dinner and maybe move straight into watching a movie “and cuddling” at Remus’s place instead. It was the final nail in the coffin Remus already saw, so he wasn’t even too disappointed.

Remus sent a polite but clear no, and knew that whoever this person was, he was not someone Remus would be building his life with. His stomach growled suddenly, reminding him that he still hadn’t eaten the dinner he was supposed to have hours earlier. Instead of going to all of the trouble to devise a meal at home, Remus decided that his troubles with the cancelled date warranted a very cheesy, doughy, and effortless meal. He quickly changed from his date clothes–– button down shirt, khakis, and tan buck shoes–– into a more comfortable, eating-pizza-alone-on-a-Friday-night ensemble: cozy sweatshirt, old blue jeans, and nikes.

When he got to the restaurant, he was still moping about getting blown-off from his date. He had sent a quick text to Dorcas and Marlene to let them know that his date was cancelled (otherwise they would have been checking his location religiously every fifteen minutes), but said he was doing okay since he didn’t want to interrupt their own date night plans with his sorrows.

Truthfully, Remus was pretty upset about what had happened. So far, online dating had not been a success, and Remus found himself returning to his secret fear that he wouldn’t ever successfully date again. Maybe it was because he was just too old, or perhaps he was out-of-touch, or it was simply because he had no real experience with dating since he had only ever had to go on one first date, and everything afterwards seemed to fall into place. If Lily was right, and he needed to meet someone organically for a relationship to work, he hoped it would happen soon.

Just then, his inner wallowing was interrupted by Sirius, carrying silverware and a glass of water. Somehow, Remus had forgotten that Sirius may be here, and hadn’t had time to prepare himself for the sight of the attractive waiter. His hair was swept into a loose bun, seemingly held together with a pencil.

“Hey there, how’s your Friday night going?”

Remus almost laughed at the question. Clearly, his night was not fantastic, because if it was, he would not be sitting in the booth of an Italian restaurant, alone, at 8:30 PM. He tried to shake off his own self-pity before answering. “Fine, thanks. How about you? Has it been busy tonight?” One of Remus’s favorite tactics when avoiding conversations about himself to his friends was to get them talking about themselves instead. Or, in the case of James, talking about Lily.

“It hasn’t been too busy today, or at least not since I got here at 5. Although,” he said, smiling almost conspiratorially, “I’ve had three different tables tell me ‘you too’ after I brought them their dinners.”

Remus laughed, and filed away the knowledge that Sirius remembered their inside joke from last time to the back of his mind for unpacking later. “I’ll have to see if I can get that number any higher then.”

“Oh, but you won’t be able to if I change up my script when I bring you your small margherita pizza. I’ll just say something like ‘here it is,’ no wishes of enjoyment included.” Sirius said, with faux sincerity.

“And what if I changed up my order on you?” Remus was surprised but pleased that Sirius remembered not only their jokes from last time about customers stumbling over words when presented with their food, but also the very food that Remus had ordered.

“I hope not, since I told the kitchen to start making it right after I saw you walk in.” Sirius grinned, but then suddenly looked almost bashful. “Although if you wanted something else, you still can order something else, that would be fine, I just thought, well, since it’s kind of late, we might as well give the ovens a head start?” His voice tilted up at the end as the statement turned into a question.

Remus liked this more approachable version of Sirius. He made him feel at ease. “No, you were right, I came here specifically for that margherita pizza. Thank you for starting it early for me.”

Sirius’s nervous smile turned soft.

***

The pizza was delicious, and succeeded in making Remus feel slightly better about the cancelled date. After all, he wouldn’t have been able to eat this much on the date, hindered by an abundance of good manners.

When Sirius dropped off the check, he also let Remus know that they would be closing soon. “You’re welcome to sit as long as you like, but the kitchen did just close.”

“No worries, I’m ready to head out. Thank you!” As Remus signed the receipt, a small to-go box was placed in front of him.

“Kitchen is closed, but you may want that for the road.” Sirius smiled warmly at Remus. “Have a good night!”

As Remus left the restaurant, carrying the small box, he reflected on Sirius’s parting words. He did have a good night, all things considered. Comfort food is one for addressing his emotional turmoil, but having a light conversation with a few inside jokes with another person is another thing entirely.

He also happily noted that he would get to bring the enclosed tiramisu with him to his breakfast with Dorcas and Marlene tomorrow. Pawning off the soggy dessert on them would be good for both reducing food waste and generating karma.

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lifewithparanormal · 4 years

Photo

Today is a very special day for me and for this blog.

Phantom Investigators is turning 18 today. Yes, may 25th in 2002 was the day the show premiered, and it’s already been 18 years. Man how time flies.

Lots of time have passed, we aged, we reached adulthood. This gang was 12 years old in 2002, 18 years later they would have been 30...

...But fictionnal characters have one advantage: they have the power to never age, staying as they are and continue to influence other generations.

.........Unless someone does a small alternate universe where the gang is now grown up and 30 years old in 2020...

...To tell the truth, this one-shot small fanfic wasn’t supposed to exist. But I fell lazy drawing the whole gang together as fanmade adults on the same sheet. I wanted to at least do something for this very specific birthday! So, did a small part AU/fanfic instead.

Click on keep reading to read the whole stuff and enjoy!

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The night was almost falling in San Francisco. In the nice season of fall, the weather was getting cold. But to one particular adult, that wasn't really important right now. In a house, a red-haired adult, named Daemona Prune, looked distressed. She was making calls, preparing food and tried her best to make the room presentable. She seemed to receive visit very soon. ...Well...in her head, they were supposed to arrive, but they seemed very late.

''What are they doing?'' she thought.

Sitting on her couch for some time, a souvenir picture was lying side to her. She looked at it with a very nostalgic feeling. A 12-year old kid, dressed with a green detective coat and a green mask, was standing along with her three friends: a black girl; a boy with glasses; and a orange-haired guy wearing fashion right out of the 2000 years.

On the back of the picture, the four names were written, in order of left to right. Casey, Kira, Daemona and Jericho.

''They're late! What are you doing? I hope you didn't forget me, cause I sure remembered you!'' she suddendly spoke.

It's been a few months since she found back this picture and that she remembered simpler times. Oh, sure, in her now-30 years old, she did see some of her friends again. But often alone, and not together. Now was going to be the first time, and boy there were some catching up to do.

But right now, Daemona was anxious, a lot happened in her life and she was scared to be forgotten. The more someone can grow up, the less time some people have to contribute to their friends. What if they didn't come? What if they only stayed for one hour after all the preparations she made?

A lot of these nervous questions quickly fade away as soon as she heard the doorbell. Waiting a few seconds to not look too awkward and impatient to herself, she then rushed into the entrance and opened the door. She went silent for some time....oh, it was not in the negative way, never was she more happy than now.

''...After all these years, you managed to all come at the same time!'' Daemona happily greeted. ''Yeah, for old time's sake, it's good to see you again Daemona!''

It was one of her old friends from the picture, Jericho, who was just saying that.

Meanwhile, Kira and Casey were transporting boxes out of the car. They were all wearing a coat for outside temperature. The gatherer looked at all her friends with admiration, they all grew into fine people. Jericho had longer hair, tied like a ponytail; Kira let her hair down; Casey, a little gain of weight, transported two boxes at once with great force.

The admiration changed slowly into question, Daemona wasn't really aware about all these boxes.

''Uuuuh...did you make a detour? I only asked you to come directly...'' ''We allowed ourselves to make a special stop.'' Kira explained, while transporting her box into the house. ''You will understand after dinner. You must be hungry after preparing everything.'' Casey added, entering the house. ''Well duh!'' Daemona added.

-----------------------

The dinner went along for some time. Not only eating, but talking about life in general: where the gang is at this point, their jobs, their family, their love life. Only Daemona seemed to be quiet about her own. Nobody seemed to know about that. ....At least not Jericho and Casey.

After dinner, the gang showed Daemona what was inside the boxes. What she found, was the surprise of her life.

''Oh by all the elementals of the netherworld, you brought the stuff from my parents's home at my old attic?'' She exclamed herself. ''Yes, we just thought it would be nice to bring some souvenirs.'' Kira explained. ''Just like old times, the more you grow up, the less you forget.'' Casey added.

If any of these objects in the box would be normal, Daemona would probably have taken this more likely, but what could she expect when she was leading the Phantom Investigators at 12 years old in an halloween costume?

Most of the adults Daemona knew in her childhood were likely oblivious to all that was paranormal or ghosts. And now, it was her and her friend's turns, it was to wonder if they still had their powers or thought about ghosts, due to their idea to bring full boxes of gadgets, books about paranormal and the netherrealm, added with souvenirs pictures of them as childs, along with Jinxie and Wad, monsters they have worked with.

''All these things? But don't you think that we're quite too old for this? I mean...we're thirty now and...'' Daemona quietly brought. ''Daemona, you're not fooling us, Kira told us about your job.'' Casey revealed, smugly smiling.

The women backed up from surprise. She directly stared at Kira.

''Wait! I told you to keep silent about this!'' Daemona frowned, pointing at her DJ friend. ''Hey, they're your friends too, they have the right to know!'' Kira shrugged.

Jericho, who was kind of silent since the dinner's end, had his eyes widened up from the realisation.

''Wait! It was really true? It wasn't a joke?'' Jericho shouted, out of surprise. ''Indeed, the books, the double identity, her cheesy rhymes about how her new book deserves the look, everything was true!'' Kira precised.

During the speeches, the mysterious job hider felt stuck in a corner. Oh well...what she did right now kind of had a close link to what she was doing as a children. It couldn't hurt to show to the same friends with which she founded the Phantom Investigators in 2002.

Warning that she'll be back in a minute. She ran into a closet right in her room. She opened it, inside was hanged a green detective coat along with green shades and a pile of books. She took one of the books, on it was written...

Putting the complete costume, she went out of the room and showed the book to her friends. Jericho was the most surprised of the gang, exclaiming himself.

''So it's really true! YOU'RE Monie! Now I recognise the outfit and the book title!'' ''She literally has the same haircut as before and it took you this long to figure this out?'' Kira weirdly gazed at his friend.

Daemona laughed, looking at all her friends.

''So, I see you're an avid fan of my teenager novels about paranormal!'' Daemona proudly boasted, playing with her hair. ''My kid loves your stories! But we never saw you in person! Do you think you could autograph one of his books now that I know it's you?'' Jericho asked.

The now-revealed author nodded, with a flattered smile.

''Sure, next time you visit my signature booth, bring your kid!'' she informed.

Kira was mocking Daemona a little, the simple look on her costume made her remember some hard, but good times.

''You know, in the end, you really haven't changed! Your excitement about supernatural and getting out with your weird outfits.'' ''You get a pass Kira, since you're one of my best friends...'' Daemona gazed.

Casey scratched his head.

''To be perfectly honest, I think my job doesn't fit with reading these kinds of books. But I guess I could shuffle some of them in my waiting room. Your stories are so light-hearted.'' ''Thank you, but you know, just because you're a vetenary and serious at your job doesn't mean you can't have feelings anymore...'' Daemona advised, putting his hand on Casey's shoulder. She seemed to know that he was hiding his true excitements. ''....I guess I... read them when I have free time.'' Casey blushed, a little shy to admit it.

Putting her hand out of her friend, Daemona sighed, looking at all the boxes of souvenirs.

''You know...I was kind of ashamed to admit my job to all of you, because I was scared that you would regret our childhood together, or that your forgot about all our trips to the netherworld.'' she revealed, out of worry. ''Seriously, how could we forget THAT?'' Jericho asked. ''I mean, we're adults now, obviously at first I thought you passed that age.'' Daemona said. ''Oh please girl friend, we're not like our parents or all the adults we knew. Being part of a team who investigates ghosts and almost got hurt everyday, it's really hard to forget. I'm an overbooked DJ, but deep down I still have the good memories of the PIs.'' Kira patted her friend's shoulder.

Daemona was really flattered about this small speech. 18 years have passed ever since she was the leader of Phantom Investigators with all her three friends present here. How surprising to her that in the end, they also kept their heart of child? Maybe less, but they were kind enough to visit her and bring her all these souvenirs.

With a wave of nostalgia, her eyebrows slowly changed of emotions, lowered down. She had a more serious voice.

''I wonder if right now, our mentor Navarro would be proud of us.'' ''Wherever he is right now, I'm sure he would be proud, same being said for your grandparents.'' Casey affirmed. ''How about Wad and Jinxie? They also were of use most of the time.'' Jericho added. ''They're monsters and eternal, I'm sure they haven't forget about us. At the very least, if there's children out here going through the same stuff as we did, I'm sure they're helping them....or scaring them.'' Daemona presumed.

Everyone looked at each other. This wasn't really an idea to throw out of the window. Maybe there was actually another team of children with powers, similar to the Phantom Investigators, seeing the same thing as they did.

Maybe this kind of mystery would be eluded one day. But right know, the memories were continuing....

''So Kira said you're still doing cheesy rhymes? ....Hey...how about one right now? For old time's sake?'' Jericho suddendly asked.

Daemona playfully rolled her eyes, fists on her hips.

''All right, just for you...''

Saying that, the costumed girl looked for a certain object in multiples boxes. Finally searching what she was looking for, she took it...

...A green phone straight out of the 2000 years. Acting like she was speaking, she held it close to her ear. Her friends started to get excited about what she would come it at that moment, so they could make jokes about it. It's after a few seconds that Daemona cleared her throat and finally said the following sentence...

''...Phantom Investigators, it's been a long time, describe us your slime!''

#phantom investigators #fanart #fanfiction #kids wb #teletoon #AU #alternate universe #fanfic #fanmade #headcanons #birthday

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neriad13 · 4 years

Text

Best of the Best Media Consumed 2019!

This year I had a whole lot of focus on nonfiction, film and comics. Resolution for next year: read more fiction. Seriously, I read over three times more nonfiction than fiction this year. I read a little over one novel a month. But I really do love picking up a book on something I know nothing about and coming away knowing more than something. X-P

Anyway! The list!

Books - Fiction

Out of the 17 works of fiction I read this year, the best of the best is...

The Snow Queen, by Joan Vinge

The Snow Queen was one of my absolute favorite fairy tales as a child. The 2002 film adaptation of it was one of the things I watched endlessly.

It was SO MUCH FUN picking apart this sci-fi retelling and discovering which characters are meant to represent the ones from the original story (of particular interest: the character representing the reindeer is human in this...and he has a one night stand with the character representing Gerta. Yes, I’m still cracking up about this. Yes, it actually was a pretty well written scene).

But the absolute best part of it was the masterful characterization. Every single character has ulterior motives and often heartbreaking reasons for why they are the way they are - especially including the Snow Queen herself, whose final scene is horrifying, tragic and beautiful.

I always like me some solid villain characterization.

Runner Up:

Fairy Tales: Traditional Stories Retold for Gay Men

I am not a gay man...but this very much spoke to me. It was at turns heartwarming and hilarious and the turns these fairy tales took felt so natural, like they’d been told that way all along.

There are also many allusions to AIDS in the stories - sometimes as something a character is directly dealing with whether in himself, or a loved one and sometimes under the guise of a metaphor for inevitability. These ones were my favorites (aside from The Frog Prince, which was turned into a metaphor for accepting the process of aging with grace).

Books - Nonfiction

Oh boy. There’s...definitely going to be more than one here. Of the 65 works of nonfiction I read this year, my favorites were...

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes & Other Lessons From the Crematory

A memoir about the author’s time spent working as a crematory operator and her entry into the funeral business. This book was absolutely hilarious (it contains a story about the author getting absolutely soaked with corpse fat that wouldn’t stop flowing straight out of the incinerator), tragic (a 12 year old girl is cremated and her ashes are mailed back to her parents as part of a cremation mail-in program) and extremely poignant (the author talks openly about the time she was contemplating suicide).

I love Caitlin’s youtube channel and I loved this book even more.

My Age of Anxiety

Partially the memoir of a man who has battled his extreme anxiety his entire life, a historical study of famous figures who have also endured it and a scientific look into why it exists at all.

Ultimately, it offers no answers. As of the writing of the book, the author has found no treatment that helps him for longer than a few months. But what he has found over the course of his research is that he is not alone - that anxiety has historically been a factor in scientific breakthroughs and artistic accomplishments. And that perhaps most importantly, that anxiety has been a key part of human evolution from the start, which served a vital role in the survival of the species.

Mental illness or evolutionary adaptation? Is there even a line between them?

Cassell’s Encyclopedia of Queer Myth, Symbol and Spirit

This is the only book, period, devoted to queer mythology, that I have ever been able to find. But the good news is that it’s fairly extensive (though the authors themselves admit that they had trouble finding as much information about non-western mythology as they did for western mythology), is chock full of references and is extremely thorough in the information it presents.

I’ll admit that it was a slog to get through at times, but what it’s provided has been invaluable to my conception of history and my own place in it.

Also, I can now say beyond a shadow of a doubt that almost every culture on earth has at some point in their history had a tradition of transgender shamans.

Hope After Faith

This is the memoir of a charismatic Pentecostal pastor turned atheist. It follows him from teenagerhood and the beginnings of his dream to be a preacher to a little bit after his deconversion decades later.

The eventual crumbling of his faith was something that spoke to me on a deep level. The scene that I still think about months later is the one in which he finally gives up his belief in the afterlife and accepts the finality of death by saying goodbye to everyone he ever loved who has died with the words “I love you, but I’m never going to see you again.”

I was not a huge fan of the writing style at first, but this one won me over totally and completely. It touched me immensely at the time when I needed it most.

Comics - Fiction

I read 52 fictional comics this year and 46 nonfiction. I absolutely raided my library’s graphic novel section for months. It was a good time.

Beautiful Darkness

A French graphic novel wherein tiny people survive and feud over the corpse of the child they came from. It’s...hard to explain. Kind of a fairy tale Lord of the Flies, but more subtly horrifying. It’s a story about decay and collapse - of society, of the physical form, of the dreams of a child. It has no single interpretation and different people may take something very different from it. The most inventive horror story I read this year.

My Brother’s Husband

A story about microaggressions and how their buildup over time can drive a wedge between people without them even noticing. I cried. Go read it.

Mis(h)adra

A semi autobiographical account of a college student learning how to live with his epilepsy. I also cried over this one.

The art is stunning, the metaphors are amazing (the main character’s epilepsy is visually portrayed as a set of ghostly knives that follow him around) and the ending is extremely affecting if you’ve ever dealt with any kind of chronic illness.

Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba

The absolute most fun I had reading a comic this year. Gets extremely dark and incredibly sad but never feels overwhelmingly heavy, thanks to its great sense of humor.

Edward Scissorhands: Parts Unknown + Whole Again

A series of adventures set decades after the movie, after Kim’s death, in a time when her granddaughter begins wondering if the stories about the castle on the hill are true.

It deals with such issues as the difficulties Kim had with her daughter growing up, when all she would do is tell stories about Edward rather than give her the emotional support she needed, whether removing the thing that both makes you unique and brings pain is worth it and how to stop angry villagers from burning down your house (again).

Also, seeing Edward be surrounded by a group of friends who care about him was extremely healing.

Comics - Nonfiction

My Solo Exchange Diary vol 1-2

A series of updates about the author’s continuing battle with mental illness and about how recovery is anything but a straight line.

Can’t We Talk About Something More Pleasant?

Finally, some light reading!

It’s a memoir about the decline and death of the author’s aging parents.

I found it...extremely comforting. Extreme old age, whether in one’s self or in one’s loved ones, is a scary and often obscured prospect, despite being a near-universal human experience. This book took the mystery out of aging and the fear out of taking care of aging parents. I’ve seen it done now. I’m more ready to do it myself.

The Best We Could Do

A memoir of the author’s family’s flight from Vietnam and their immigration to America, through the lens of the birth of the author’s first child. About how being a refugee changes a person in small, often unexpected ways, how trauma leaves its mark on families - and how, knowing all this, one can still keep living and raising the next generation.

Film - Fiction

I caught up on a lot of classics I’d not seen before and really got into Jidaigeki this year. Me putting only four of them on the list is a show of restraint. Of the 64 films I watched this year...

The Fall of the House of Usher

Impeccable costume and psychedelic set design. The unanswered question that bounces throughout the entire movie: is it the curse or is it the fault of human belief in the curse?

Patch your walls, dude.

A Monster With a Thousand Heads

A Mexican thriller about a woman whose husband is denied cancer treatment for seemingly no reason. The doctor gives her the runaround. No one can answer her questions. No one listens to her.

So, naturally, she and her teenage son spend a night kidnapping and holding at gunpoint every person she needs to get her husband’s cancer treatment approved. Wild and intense and timely.

Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb

I watched a couple of Kubrick movies I hadn’t seen before and of them...I died laughing at this one. The tight plotting! The inevitable buildup to disaster over something so insanely stupid!

I did not live during the Cold War, but damn do I feel for the inherent ridiculousness of it now.

Seven Samurai

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAFGFTRTRNHUKIJUHNJNHHHHHHHHHHHHYHYHYHYHYHYHYHYHYXCVVGGERDSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

...this movie is insanely good. I watched Citizen Kane this year. This movie’s better.

It has a plot which can be described in its totality, in a single sentence - a group of samurai are hired to defend a village from bandits - but what they do with that premise is so much more than that.

This movie is three hours long. It did not lag once.

Hara Kiri

As the Tokugawas secure their grip on all of Japan, war ceases. Great houses are dissolved and their retainers, cast into the streets. The relevance of the samurai is ending and the cities are awash in starving ronin.

Once, one of these starving ronin approached a great house, asking if he might be able to end his life honorably, in front of witnesses there. So impressed was the lord with this ronin’s resolve, that he instead hired him on as one of his retainers.

Hearing this story, other ronin, having no intention of actually offing themselves, tried the same trick in the hopes of securing a job, or at the very least, a little something to eat.

It became a common scam which, in the end, fooled no one. Most houses gave the ronin a handful of cash and sent them on their way.

But one house, seeking to preserve their warlike spirit in these peaceful times, chooses to treat one beggar ronin very differently.

This is the story of vengeance taken for that death.

Yojimbo

A ronin enters a town that is being torn apart by gang warfare and decides to play both sides in order to end the conflict. It contains such comedic gems as:

- the ronin suddenly deciding not to take part in a street battle, leaving both sides evenly matched and extremely nervous about fighting each other, while he watches it all from the top of a watchtower, laughing his ass off

- the ronin is critically injured and being smuggled out of town in a coffin. A fight breaks out while this is happening and scares away one of the people carrying the coffin. A less intelligent goon of the gang he just escaped from is cheerfully recruited to carry the coffin the rest of the way

- standing up in the coffin, declaring that he’s fine and immediately fainting

Also, you should totally bring a knife to a gun fight.

Ran

A jidaigeki reimagining of King Lear.

A visually astounding, sweeping epic with amazing acting and a complex interplay of conflicting passions which might just be more bleak than the original play.

The scene in which the main character goes mad and is cast out into the wilderness is especially haunting.

Jojo Rabbit

I don’t think I’ve EVER experienced such violent mood whiplash in a movie before. One moment you’re crying-laughing from a joke that hit with absolute perfection and the next you’re...actually crying. In the same scene. Within thirty seconds. Multiple times. It is the oddest feeling to be so elated by the best joke in the entire movie while every character we’ve come to know across the course of the movie is in the process of dying violently. It’s not a feeling everyone’s going to like, but for me it was completely new and fantastic.

The best part of the movie is the main character’s relationship with Imaginary Friend Hitler. He’s wildly funny and relentlessly charming. I got excited every time he appeared in a scene and was, oddest of all, actually comforted by his presence.

He was all of these things until, in the most terrifying scene in the movie, he was not.

This movie shows you the mechanisms through which fascism becomes an appealing idea for a lonely child by putting the audience through a version of the same process. It’s so clever, so funny and so sad.

What do you do when your world is destroyed by absurdity and there is nothing left for you to return to?

You dance in the streets.

TV Series

Good Omens

Wildly hilarious comedy, fantastic costume design, multiple androgynous characters for which NO ONE bats an eye and honestly?? the best queer love story I’ve ever seen in television or film.

The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance

I am not sure if I have ever seen a production with so much love poured into it. The dozens of painstakingly crafted sets and characters, the sheer level of artistry on display - the next thing I saw was always more amazing than the thing I’d seen before it and the amazingness just kept coming with no end in sight throughout the entirety of the show.

And the story itself! The way it deepened and played with the lore of the original movie in the most perfect and unexpected ways! It felt like I was watching the most fantastic and labor intensive piece of fanfiction ever conceived, that was written by a person with a deep passion for and knowledge of the source material.

Speaking of fantastic throwbacks...

Dororo

I’ve said a lot about this one already. While it ultimately fell kind of flat, what it did get right was phenomenal. The motherfucking FIGHT SCENES! The love between bros! The fascinating reconception of Hyakkimaru’s powers and its emphasis on a disabled character actually being portrayed as disabled! The journey of good characters going down the path of evil with good intentions!

Mwah!

Primal eps 1-5

Genndy Tartakovsky’s next big project after the completion of Samurai Jack!

It is gory. Like, extremely gory. Do you know how much gore a thing has to have before I consider it ‘extremely gory?’ It’s a lot. Like...really a lot. There’s a thirty second (or possibly longer. time lost all meaning as I watched it) sequence in which the main character punches the intestines out of a horde of hominids in loving, exacting detail. It’s like Genndy’s letting out all the pent-up gore he was forced to keep in check during the years when he was working on Samurai Jack.

But it isn’t just gore. It’s a journey about the main character’s grief over the sudden, horrific, unexpected death of his entire family. A story which is also mirrored by that of the dinosaur he joins forces with. There were parts during it in which I literally felt my heart being torn in two over the travails of these two, as well as wildly funny and completely adorable parts.

The settings, creature design and fight choreography are insanely creative, as is the decision to do it with no dialogue whatsoever.

And that cliffhanger, DAMN!! They’d better get the next five episodes out soon!

Honorable Mention:

Rick and Morty S4 eps 1-5

This one doesn’t entirely make the list proper because the latter two episodes...were rather subpar. But I can’t entirely keep it off the list because the quality of the first three episodes was off the charts. A particular shoutout to ‘The Old Man and the Seat’ and ‘One Crew Over the Crewcoo’s Morty’ - the former, which somehow managed to use toilet humor, of all things, to reach a crushingly tragic conclusion and the latter, which has a twist better than that of some of my favorite horror movies.

Games

Shogun 2

I didn’t do a whole lot of gaming at all this year. But what I did do is have a fantastic time getting into the Total War franchise. Shogun 2 was my entry point and a FANTASTIC game. The ninja animations! The tiny, exacting animations of every single person running around on a sinking ship! The way Realm Divide changes the game into something much more dangerous and the way I learned to dance on the edge of it until I was good and ready!

Plays

Love’s Labours Lost

One of two Shakespeare plays I saw this year, the other being The Tempest - which was also excellent (especially the part where it legit started raining when Ariel summoned the storm in the first scene and then that showing had to be cancelled. The second time was the charm).

Love’s Labours Lost had some excellent comedy and the usual absurd web of misunderstandings you’d expect to find in your standard Shakespeare romcom. But the thing which pushed it over the edge for me was that...it had a sad ending. It goes against the definition of comedy and has a sad ending. Because it was so unexpected, it hit unexpectedly hard and made it that much more memorable.

#jojo rabbit #akira kurosawa #rick and morty #the dark crystal: age of resistance #good omens #primal #a thought #long post

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shiningamongdarkness · 5 years

Text

Chapter 10. That girl did it, right?

Shining among Darkness

By WingzemonX

Chapter 10 That girl did it, right?

After her pleasant meeting with Anna Morgan, Matilda took the rest of the afternoon to rest, think, and decide. She failed to do much of any of the three things. In the early night, she returned to her hotel room, took a hot bath to relax, and changed her clothes to something more comfortable: a baggy shirt she was given at a congress in Arizona she had attended four months ago, orange shorts, and no stockings or heels for the rest of that day.

She stood a few minutes in front of her laptop, trying to write some notes about that day. However, what kind of records could she write from the fact that a woman had directly asked her to kill her daughter? Yes, there was definitely a lot that could be taken out of that behavior, but she could only think about how much something like that could hit and affect the recovery of her accurate patient.

She gave up about it and preferred to do something else to clear her mind: talk with her mother.

In the time she had been in Salem, she had spoken with her mother by a phone call two or three times, especially on the weekend. Usually, she would first send a couple of messages to make sure she was not busy, and then would dial to speak more comfortably; neither was at all fanatic of having long conversations by text, especially if they have important things to say. On that occasion, however, Matilda chose to call directly without prior notice.

Luckily, Jennifer Honey was not busy or not enough to not answer a call from her beloved adopted daughter. When her phone rang, she was alone and silent, sitting comfortably in one of the armchairs in the living room of her spacious house in Arcadia, California, reading a detective-themed pocket novel under the light of an old-fashioned but functional lamp. But she did not hesitate to put her book aside when she saw the photo of Matilda and her, appearing suddenly on the screen of her phone, accompanied by that generic tune of an incoming call that she had never known, or even duly investigated, how to change.

At first, she felt somewhat alarmed by the sudden call, but that was something of any mother, or so she supposed. Matilda soon explained that it was nothing to be alarmed about, but that it was something a bit serious and she needed to talk to someone. Jennifer already knew the general context of Samara and her parents (as far as professional secrecy allowed), so the previous introduction was quite short, and she could go almost immediately to tell her about the little fruitful meeting with Mrs. Morgan.

"It sounds horrible," Jennifer exclaimed, almost horrified right after Matilda finished her description of the encounter.

"Keep calm, I have faced more horrible things."

"How is that supposed to calm me?"

Jennifer's voice had taken an almost comic tone, admittedly accidentally, that Matilda was hopelessly amused. She raised her feet to the bed, sat down, and hugged her legs with her free arm. Finally, she rested her chin on her knees and stared at the television off.

"This girl's situation is so terrible," Matilda whispered slowly. "It seems as if every adult in her life, those who should take care or help her, only end up hating her, wanting to hurt or take advantage of her. Her biological mother, her adoptive parents, her doctors... And the worst part is that she is aware of that." She sighed regretfully. "She is so alone..."

"No, she's not," Jennifer pointed out firmly. "You are with her, and many times, all you need is a single person that extends her sincere hand to move forward."

A small smile peeked over Matilda's lips.

"I know that very well."

And she did know.

"But the truth is that I'm no longer sure what to do now..."

She lay on the bed, covering her eyes with her forearm.

"I made a rookie mistake, and now I have to remedy it in some way," she lamented, tiredly in her tone. "I got carried away by my perceptions and desires. And all this time, I have promised Samara to help her get out, meet her parents, and return to her normal life. But now, that may never happen."

She raised her arm from her eyes to her forehead and placed these on the white, smooth ceiling.

"It seems really difficult that the relationship with their parents can be repaired. Her mother is too affected and out of her mind, and her father doesn't really seem interested. I fear that it is likely that even if I manage to get her out of that Psychiatric Hospital, the Morgan's won't wish to continue taking care of her."

"They can't just get rid of their daughter that way."

"My parents did it, and I was their biological daughter."

"That was different. You actually got rid of them."

Matilda grimaced. That had some truth, in fact.

"You really don't think the father will agree to stay with her?" Jennifer questioned, trying to find some solution to all the problem.

"I can try to persuade him, but I have a feeling he won't do it without his wife. It may be a risky deduction, but it seems to me that she was the one interested in having children, and he only fulfilled her wish. Likewise, I think he contacted the Foundation more interested in save her than Samara."

Matilda had noticed all that since the conversation they had in Moesko. The way he expressed himself of Samara at times was too distant and absent; as if it were more of a neighbor or a distant relative than her father.

"I don't know how I'll do it, but I think I'll have to prepare Samara for that possibility. But I fear that no matter how I do, it will end up destroying her. If you saw how her eyes light up when we talk about her parents, especially her mother... And she, on her side, asks a complete stranger to kill her."

"What about her birth mother? Don't you think she might want to meet her and recover the time?"

Such a comment impressed Matilda so much that she unconsciously sat back on the bed, almost alarmed.

"The woman who wanted to drown her while she was a newborn? I don't think that will be a viable better option."

"You say she has been in treatment for twelve years. Maybe she's already better."

Matilda thought for a few moments. It was not a possibility that she had seriously considered, not even in those moments. Could it be possible? The more she thought about it, the less clear the "yes" or the "no" seemed to her as answers to that question.

"I don't know," she hesitated, somewhat uncertain. "I don't even know if she's really still alive. I hadn't had time to think about it properly."

"Don't let this affect you so much," Jennifer exclaimed in a somewhat empathetic tone. Matilda wondered if she had heard something in her voice that would make her comment. "It's not too late for you to take Jane's advice and pass the case to someone else."

"No," she said immediately firmly. "I can't do that, not now."

"I admire your effort to want to help all the children who need you, Matilda. But sometimes you must have enough humility to accept when you can't do it. Don't let your mere pride end up affecting you and that girl negatively."

"It's not pride..." she stammered, with the same feeling of doubt as before.

She rested her forehead against her hand and closed her eyes for a few moments. Was it pride that kept her there? Perhaps there was a bit of it because the thought of stepping back in those moments with the tail between the legs seemed cowardly and humiliating. Maybe she exaggerated. But more reasons prevented her from going back... more personal reasons than mere pride.

"What would have happened if you had done that?" She exclaimed suddenly, taking the woman completely by surprise on the other side of the line. "What would have happened if you had stepped aside? What would have happened to me? Would I have ended up like Carrie White, perhaps?"

A deep and awkward silence formed in those moments, of which Matilda immediately regretted having created. Even without uttering any sound, she could see her adoptive mother hesitating sitting in the armchair of her living room, facing the muted fireplace, with her arm resting against the side back, and her face full of confusion and fear at the mere mention of that name.

"I'm sorry," she excused herself, a little calmer. "Eleven told me that this case affects me too much because it reminds me of Carrie's... And I think she's right."

"Matilda..." Jennifer muttered, somewhat fearful, and unable to say anything else.

"They really do look alike so much, and not just because of the things their mother told me. She is so affected and hurt, and everyone around her already labels her as a monster. I feel that if I left her right now if I neglect a little, she would end like Carrie. And I can't let it happen again.

"It won't happen," Jennifer declared with much more certainty in her voice. "I know that no matter what you have to do, you will help this girl. You are the most capable person I know. So calm down, relax, and let that beautiful brain of yours think of the next step when you feel ready."

Matilda smiled, satisfied by those words.

"Thanks, mom."

She managed to hear a small, but present, laugh escaping from her mother's lips just after that comment.

"What? What happens?"

"I don't know. I only remembered when you started living with me, and it was tough for you to call me like that."

"How? Mom?" A pretty similar giggle arose from Matilda's lips without her proposing. She lay back on the bed but now face down, resting on her elbows and with his feet hanging from one of the side edges. "Don't worry, you'll always be Miss Honey for me. Even today, you continue teaching me as a good teacher."

Her voice was much quieter and more relaxed, and that caused the same feeling to flood, although to a lesser extent, to Jennifer Honey's chest.

"I promise I'll go visit you and Max as soon as I have a chance to leave here for a few days."

"Don't worry," Jennifer said sweetly; as sweet as her last name could be. "Your current case is seen to be very important. Here we will be waiting for you as long as necessary. But do your mother a favor: ask Jane for advice, she may be able to tell you what to do."

Matilda wanted to let out a moan of annoyance after hearing that comment, but it was drowned in her throat.

"So far I can hear how you roll your eyes, young lady," Jennifer said sternly, taking her adopted daughter by surprise. "You can't stay mad at her forever."

"I'm not mad," Matilda grumbled slowly. "I just can't run to Eleven every time I have a problem. Besides, she was supposed to send someone to help me, but she hasn't even told me who will be or when he will come."

"Maybe she's busy too."

"Maybe…"

Deep down, Matilda hoped that she had actually forgotten, or had not found that person with the other type of experience. It was difficult for her to assume that someone could give her the help she needed at the time to remedy the problem that had arisen that same day. Besides, Samara had barely agreed to meet Cody; she couldn't just reach her with some other stranger.

That reminded her that she had to talk to Cody and see when he could see Samara. She made a quick mental note to speak to him in a little while; although first perhaps she had to determine whether she should talk to Samara about what happened with her mother, or not. Maybe it would be better to work it after she saw Cody and thus was more receptive... but what if she managed to detect some of it in her mind? Just as she had discovered about Carrie.

Hard decisions.

"Well, maybe I will call her," Matilda said after a while of meditation. But only to update it.

"That was enough for me."

Both laughed and continued talking casually for a few more minutes before said goodbye and hanging up.

"Thank you for everything, mom. I love you."

"And I to you, my dear."

Once they cut, Matilda lay down, with her chin resting on her arms, and her eyes on the red curtains, behind which the window overlooking the street and the air conditioner was hidden, at that time, turned off.

Matilda disliked hotels, but she found it relaxing; mainly because of its silence and its stillness. It reminded her of a library. That kind of silence always helped her think better. No scandals, no laughs, no televisions on making a devilish noise, no people screaming. Of course, there was not always absolute silence in the hotels, but that one, in particular, was very calm. However, even then, she could not decide more easily her actions.

She placed her cell phone in front of her face, and stared at the screen as if trying to turn it on with her mind; In fact, maybe she could do it if she tried.

Should she really talk to Eleven? She did not feel very encouraged to do so. During those days, she had been mailing her progress; or at least the ones she considered necessary to be aware of.

Not that she was upset about her last talk, but... she wasn't happy either.

Before talking to her, she should first talk to Cody and tell him what Samara had said. By mere reflection, she went to her contacts, but after two seconds she remembered that she did not have his new number stored, but that Eleven had passed it on. She then went to the call log, looking back for the last call she had made; hadn't really had so many during those days, so it shouldn't be an exhaustive task either.

He stopped at the first unknown phone she had on her record, but... that wasn't Cody's; In fact, it was an incoming call, and a week ago, early.

It took her a while to remember it, but in the end, it came: Doug Ames's call, the day the incident with Samara occurred.

That had been completely erased. And, as she recalled, Doug said he would send her an email with the information that was possible about that hard case that Professor Armstrong had recommended reviewing with her. However, he never sent it, or at least it seemed to her that he hadn't.

She decided to check on his laptop for more convenience. She focused her gaze on the device on the desk, and it rose in the air as if two invisible hands had to get it. Then the computer approached with moderate speed towards her, crossing the room with total normality. Matilda hoped there really wasn't a hidden camera inside that room, or that recording might end up on some unsolved mystery channel on YouTube.

Matilda sat on the bed, and the laptop landed delicately in front of her. She opened it, and a few minutes later, she was checking her inbox from last week. She had several emails, but none even remotely related to Doug and his case.

She rechecked his call log; there was no missed call, nor from the cell phone had he spoken to, nor of any other.

Matilda felt at that moment a rather strange sensation throughout her body; something similar to worry. But why? Just because a person with whom she had not spoken for a couple of years and who sadly still could not put a clear face on her mind, hadn't sent an email or contacted again in a week? There were many explanations for this. Perhaps he had felt some reluctance to want to help him, which was not precisely false. Maybe he passed the case to someone else, or maybe he found another expert who could help him. But none of those explanations relieved that feeling of concern and... Guilt? Did she feel guilty?

She thought a little, hugging her legs, and having her eyes focused on her computer screen, with her inbox open. She tried to remember a little about what Doug had told her about his complicated case.

But at this moment, I have a somewhat complicated case, he had said. It is about a girl whom her parents tried to burn alive in her oven. Maybe you heard about the incident in newspapers or social networks. There was much echo because of the horrible act.

It definitely sounded like something that would make a stir, although she personally hadn't heard anything. She decided to do a quick search about it, and it didn't take long to skip the results with news and articles. The first two pages she opened were mostly summaries, not much more than Doug's own description of the case, except for one fact: the names of the parents and the girl.

The parents were Edward and Margaret Sullivan, who at that time were admitted to a mental institution. The girl's name, meanwhile, was...

"Lilith Sullivan," Matilda read in a low voice without intending to. It seemed a curious name, but not strange. In spite of the direct or indirect biblical relationship that anyone could do, it was still a pretty name in its own way.

She kept searching and opening links until she could find some pictures of Lilith or at least more information about her. Because she was a minor and the care they had with her privacy, Matilda was a little surprised even to have found her name. Finding its location, or at least one photograph could become complicated... but in the end, she found the latter.

It was an article, from a few days after the incident, who talks a little more extensively about the case, although it was slightly used as a basis to be able to elaborate speech about child abuse in general, that was still occurring in the United States. The case of Lilith Sullivan, although in the text they referred to her more as Lily, was the main headline, accompanied by a photograph of a girl of about ten-years-old, with a sharp face, small eyes of a grayish blue, and dark brown hair, straight and held in a ponytail. She wore a discreet red sweater. It looked like a yearbook photograph because the photo basically covered half of her chest to the tip of her head. She looked at the camera, her body slightly side face, with a studio background, and a small smile on her thin pink lips.

Matilda looked carefully at the picture. She was a pretty girl, primarily because of her striking and penetrating eyes. Anyone who saw that picture would surely take it as a totally normal girl, a victim of her deranged parents, or an innocent soul who had the bad luck of being born in a home so dysfunctional and broken. Matilda herself had had that feeling since Doug told her about it, or while checking all the links she had opened. However, seeing that picture, seeing that look, that smile... something seemed wrong. Matilda did not know what it was exactly, but simply, after seeing that face, she felt that something did not fit, that it was not right.

What could it mean? Quite a few things, it seemed to her.

She thought about touching the image on the screen and seeing if she received any kind of information flash. At first, she hesitated, but in the end, she approached her fingers, until they were placed on the surface of the screen. Not every time it gave results, and she had never tried touching something on a screen. Luckily, it worked... but a part of her would have wished it weren't.

Suddenly, she felt as she ran out of the air, and a horrible pain flooded her chest as if someone had forced his hand and pressed her organs between his fingers. A series of awful images ran through her mind one after the other, without any order or logic. These images were accompanied by sounds that sounded with direct intensity in her head; most of them were incompressible, but they seemed to be... screams of despair.

But more than the images, more than the screams, the most overwhelming were the sensations that ran through her body: fear, terror, confusion, anger, despair, desolation... agony.

She pushed herself away from the laptop, stood up from the bed, and kept backing up without realizing it until her back was against the wall; and yet then she wanted to move further away from that picture. She then went to the bathroom, leaning over the sink, feeling so dizzy and unsettled that she thought she would vomit; luckily, it was not so. She suffered the attack of a pair of arcades, but everything remained in.

When she finally got her breath back, she sat on the closed toilet and rested her face against her hands. She could feel her heartbeat rumbling in her head.

She had never felt anything like that; did not believe that her almost scarce and intermittent clairvoyance, which she barely became aware of during her puberty, could produce such a flash of images and sensations. She didn't know what it meant, but she was sure of one thing. It was like an intrusive thought that flashed in the depths of her mind, and it had taken root firmly there: that girl is dangerous.

Matilda got up again and went to her phone on the bed. She looked for Doug's number and dialed it, but there was no answer. She scored a total of three times, and the result was the same: it jumped straight into voicemail.

"Damn!" She let out frustrated. Without realizing it, she had started to walk around the room in circles.

She quickly thought of some alternative. Search him online or on Facebook? Where else could she find it? She remembered what he had said about his work as a child psychologist in Family Affairs. Would it work if she called him there? She wasn't even sure he worked directly there or anywhere else. But still had nothing to lose. She knew she had little chance of finding him there, but she felt desperate; that intrusive thought did not leave her alone.

The doctor hurriedly searched the number of that office in Portland. She dialed the number, and after hearing the menu options two laps, she chose the option to request information from an operator. She waited a few minutes, accompanied by a sticky melody before someone finally answered her.

"Department of Social & Family Affairs," the voice of a young girl exclaimed solemnly.

"Hello, goodnight," Matilda said in turn, trying to sound as calm as possible. "I know it's a bit late, but I need to communicate with Doug Ames. I think he works there as a child psychologist. Will he be there, or do you know how I can communicate with him?"

There was silence on the other side, a silence that lasted too long from the perspective of the young psychiatrist.

"Hello?" She exclaimed after waiting patiently, fearing that perhaps the call had been cut. But it was not like that. A little later, she heard her falter.

"One moment please," the woman on the phone said at last, and immediately the waiting tune returned, long before Matilda could even thank her.

That seemed strange to her, and it was of no help to appease the concern that flooded her chest. She kept waiting, now even longer than before. She walked with her bare feet for the carpet in the room, wondering how difficult it was to communicate with someone, or just tell her that the person she was looking for is gone.

When she was already getting fed up with the waiting tune, it was cut again, and once again a female voice attended, although it was not the same as before.

"Hello? Who is?"

Matilda broke loose a little but tried to respond quickly.

"Hello, my name is Matilda Honey. I was looking for Doug Ames."

There was an instant of doubt from the other woman.

"For what matter, if I may ask?"

"We were classmates in the Doctorate. A few days ago, he called me to ask for an opinion on a case, but he hasn't communicated with me again. I'm dialing to his cell phone, but he doesn't answer me."

"Some days ago?" the woman questioned interrogatively.

"Yes, like a week ago. Is there where he works or do I have to call somewhere else?"

Again silence, followed by small hesitations that left the young woman quite confused.

"I... I'm sorry," the woman said dubiously on the phone, "but Doug... He died just a week ago."

Matilda's feet were planted dry in place, and her breathing cut off suddenly. She needed too much self-control not to drop her phone from her hand.

"What?!" She snapped dumbfounded. "What are you talking about? That can't be true."

"It was sudden, I think an accident in his bathroom last Tuesday."

"On Tuesday? No, no, Tuesday was when he called me. What happened?"

"I don't have the details, I'm sorry. All the children he treated were passed to another psychologist. Maybe I can give you her information if you like..."

"Hold on a second," she snapped, forcing the woman to shut up. Matilda separated her phone from her ear and stared thoughtfully at the red curtains on the wall. She needed only a second to calm down. She had just come out of her previous impact, and now she was hit again without warning.

Dead? Was Doug dead? How had it happened? The feeling of disgust in his mouth and pain in his stomach returned again, but this time, she managed to control them. She breathed slowly and counted to ten; the lights jingle a little at that moment, but she hoped it was just coincidence.

She must think quickly, make that beautiful brain works. She tried to remember the conversation that she and Doug had step by step.

"And I'm not saying that girl is involved, but the social worker who is in charge of her is a good friend, and I think she also senses something strange after what happened."

The social worker, perhaps she knew more than Doug had told her. Matilda put her cell phone back in her ear and exclaimed:

"Can you transfer me to Social Work... or wherever the social workers who are dealing with Doug's cases were?"

"The social workers?" "The woman answered, confused.

"Yes, I need to talk with the social worker about Doug's case that he wanted to consult me. Can you contact me or should I call another number?"

"I'll see what I can do... Wait."

Again the tedious waiting music, but Matilda barely noticed it on that occasion. She took that pause to clarify her ideas a bit. She still had a hard time believing that really a person she had just talked to a few days ago was now dead, and out of nowhere. It was inevitable for her to think in Carrie White again... In that awful night...

But she couldn't let her mind wander about it; she needed to focus on the present. Was that the horrible feeling she had just meant? No, what she had felt was something much worse, if the sudden death of a person was no terrible enough. Besides, she couldn't avoid the most important thing: she had felt it when she touched Lilith Sullivan's picture. All that could not be a coincidence...

The most obvious answer would also be the most worrying...

"Hello, Adrian Wayne speaks," a deep, now masculine voice, suddenly sounded on the line and making her react at the same time.

"Hello, I am looking for the social worker who took the case of the girl that her parents wanted to burn in their oven."

"Excuse me?" The man exclaimed between confused and annoyed, perhaps because of her subtle description.

"The case of the girl who wanted to burn in an oven, Lilith Sullivan. Do you know it or not?"

"Yes, I do, Miss." His tone became quite defensive. "If you are a reporter, I advise you in advance that…"

"No, I'm not a reporter. I need to talk to who takes that case; it is urgent."

The man who had introduced himself as Adrian Wayne was silent for a few moments. It seemed to Matilda that he was trying to determine if what she was saying was true or not.

"The social worker in charge of that case has retired for today," he finally informed her.

"Damn," Matilda let out by mere reflex, without realizing it. "Can you give me her mobile or home number?"

"Sorry, but I can't give you that information, especially if I don't even know who you are."

"Didn't you hear the urgent part ?!" Matilda exclaimed forcefully, fueled primarily by frustration and the great mixture of emotions that enveloped her. Adrian Wayne, apparently, did not take this very well.

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't help you. If you like to communicate tomorrow, you can do it. Goodnight…"

"Hold on please!" The psychiatrist said quickly before he cut. Luckily, he listened and stayed. Matilda took the opportunity to take a deep breath and calm down. "Sorry, I am upset. Let me start over: I'm Dr. Matilda Honey, I'm a psychiatrist and colleague of Doug Ames. Did you know him?" Wayne did not answer anything, but by his silence, Matilda sensed that the answer was a yes. "He called me a few days ago, just before he died. He wanted to ask me for help on this case, about the girl in this incident. I just found out about his death, and I need to talk with the social worker who took care of the girl. It's imperative. Can you help me?"

It seemed to have been too much for Mr. Wayne because he failed to respond immediately; again, most likely, he was trying to determine whether or not to believe in what she was saying.

"I… the most I can do is pass on your message so she can contact you as soon as she can."

Matilda sighed, frustrated, and resigned.

"Yes, all right. I will give you my number. Tell her that I'm Dr. Matilda Honey, Doug's colleague. That called me immediately, please."

After providing him with her cell phone number, and a final farewell word, they hung up. Matilda sat for a few moments on the bed and covered her forehead and eyes with his fingers. That was definitely not her day. She wanted to throw herself to bed and just rest, but she couldn't do it; not yet, because she had two, or maybe three, calls more to do.

She didn't know what was happening, but she would find out.

The first of her calls go to Cody, but no longer with the same intention she had initially. She searched again for his number in the register and dialed it. This time, the middle school teacher did answer.

"Hello?" She heard the young man's soft voice slowly murmur.

"Cody, hello. Sorry to call you so suddenly, are you busy?"

"Matilda? No, I was just…" He hesitated a little as if trying to find the right excuse; perhaps she had interrupted him at some delicate moment. "What happens? You hear altered."

And it wasn't just how she was heard: she was really altered. But it wasn't time for it.

"Listen, I know this is very sudden and without warning, but I need to ask you a favor. Could you accompany me to Portland early tomorrow?"

"To Portland?" Cody became notoriously confused. "I thought the girl you were treating was near Salem."

"It's about something else. It's long to explain, I'll tell you better when we meet. But there is another girl who was being treated by a colleague of mine, and he is now dead." She surprised herself when she realized the coldness with which she had said that last, but also sensed that it had altered Cody. "He thought the girl could have an Antisocial Personality Disorder."

"So she is a psycho girl?"

"Something like that... But I think it could be something else."

Cody thought for a few seconds.

"Something else like our specialty?"

"Exactly."

It was the theory that made the most sense to her. For some reason, Dr. Armstrong had suggested Doug talk to her, and for some reason, she had felt that horrible feeling when she touched the photo. But of course, all that was circumstantial, and more a sense than anything else. She hoped that maybe Dr. Armstrong could give her a little more light on what Doug told him; that was just the call she would make after that one.

"Maybe it's nothing, but if it's something and I don't know what, I could need some support. I know it's too much to ask and you should miss your classes. If you can't…"

"No, no, don't worry," Cody answered without a doubt. "I'll be there. Where do we meet?"

Matilda sighed in relief; she could definitely use his support. Not only by his knowledge and his unique Shining but also because of his support as a friend, because in those moments, she felt that she was not able to support herself.

After agreeing on a place and an hour, Matilda left him to finish what he was doing, and also made the preparations he would take to make the trip tomorrow. She, on the other hand, had another call to make.

It must have been after eleven in New Haven, and Dr. Taddeo Armstrong was an older man. Most likely, she would catch him asleep, but she needed to speak with him urgently. The phone rang for a long time, so more that she thought it would end up being cut. But it remained until at last a husky and sleepy voice was present.

"Hello? Matilda?" He exclaimed slowly, then followed by a deep and long yawn.

"Hello, Dr. Armstrong. I'm sorry, did I wake you up?" Silly question, but it had escaped from her lips alone, without her intention.

"No, no. I was just reading," the professor explained himself, just before releasing another yawn, although shorter than the previous one. "What can I do for you, dear? Something happens?"

He spoke to her quite naturally, even though they had not spoken directly in a couple of years. Some people are like that, the psychiatrist thought; although not all shine like Dr. Armstrong.

"I need to talk to you about something. Doug Ames of the Doctorate spoke to me a few days ago. He told me that he contacted you and asked for advice, and you recommended him to talk to me."

"Yes, I did. Was it wrong?"

"No, of course not. But... I just found out that Doug passed away; the same day that he talked to me."

Matilda could feel the man's breathing on the line cut off, and any trace of sleep he had on him simply vanished. Matilda had many questions in mind that she wanted to ask him, about what he talked with Doug, about why he recommended him talking to her, or anything that could give some light on that situation that had suddenly fallen on her shoulders without warning. However, the next thing that came out of Armstrong's mouth was so horrible enough, straightforward and clear, that Matilda's blood freezes, and convinces her, even more, to make that trip the next day:

"That girl did it, right?" He inquired gravely, but with noticeable alertness in his voice.

END OF CHAPTER 10

Author's Notes:

-Jennifer Honey is based entirely on the respective character of the 1996 movie, Matilda. More details about her will be given later.

-Adrian Wayne is based on Wayne's character from the 2009 film Case 39. In that movie, his full name is never mentioned, so the name of "Adrian" is an aggregate from me. Also, more details about him will be given later.

#Matilda Wormwood #jennifer honey #matilda #Lily Sullivan #case 39 #shining among darkness #resplandor entre tinieblas #wingzemonx #fanfic

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ohwhatamessiam · 6 years

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Lonely

Summary: You’ve just left behind your friends, family, and old life to move to NYC for your new job, but finding a connection in the bustling, crowded city seems impossible. That is until you meet the barista at the coffee shop 2 blocks away from your apartment.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: Language probably? Otherwise this is kinda cute and fluffy, and Bucky is excitable (inspired by how soft Seb looked at TIFF 2017!)

A/N: Hi guys! This is my submission for the prompt Lonely to @ughjoekeery‘s Wonderland Writing Challenge! I’ve never written a coffee shop AU so I decided to try it out, even though I’m sure there’s 20 other fics just like it. A big thanks to my beta @fangirlisms-22, who loves anything and everything coffee related. There is a part 2 to this post and it’s called Lie (my second prompt from Caro’s Writing Challenge). If you want to be tagged in the second part, send me an ask!

I love feedback, so tell me what you think!

Home had gotten, claustrophobic.

Your relationships felt restricting. Confined by your family, constantly trying to live up to their expectations to prevent disappointing them. Hell, even your friends had become limiting.

Your job was one of the few places you felt you had room to grow at your own pace. While you were suffocating in your personal life, you’d decided to apply for a promotion. Having been a copy editor for a publishing house for almost two years, and you were ready for a change. The news that you got the book editor position strained your relationships even more. But that didn’t matter to you because you got a great job, in New York City.

The promotion gave you the confidence to break away from your routine. Although you’d grown comfortable at home, you were also very lonely. All these people were in your life, ever present reminders of what you were supposed to be or do. Yet, you felt like no one was there. No one truly wanted you to do what was best for you. And it didn’t matter how many people were around you, the intimacy you desperately desired wasn’t present.

Moving to New York alone was the exciting part of breaking out of your comfort zone, but your bank account wasn’t quite equipped to handle it. You found a studio apartment in Brooklyn, not far from the subway you had to ride in to Manhattan, but it was tiny. Yet, you packed your bags and picked up your life.

No one said how hard it would be to find a real connection in the city. Over 8 million people in such close proximity, but within your first couple weeks in the city, no one clicked with you. Sure, your new coworkers were nice and chatty, but there was no after work bonding. No lunches spent getting to know each other. You knew two actual people who lived in the city that you attempted to keep contact with, but they lived in Queens and Hell’s Kitchen.

So you spent your time alone. At first, you could still pretend it was nice, good to have independence. But that went away quickly as you spent every night in, watching TV or working. It made the loneliness you felt at home seem tiny. This loneliness swallowed you whole and left you staring at a blank wall in bed, holding onto your pillow like it was another person. You even caught yourself talking out loud to no one. You needed a friendly face to latch onto, just a person to bond with. But you went on with your life.

A couple weeks later you picked up a new writer for the company. She sent you the first draft of her novel and begged you for some help editing. Needing a day out of the office, you head home but got blocked in on the subway and miss your normal exit. Getting off at the next stop, you decide to just walk the five extra blocks. Knowing the book is 800 pages long, you plan on making a large pot of coffee and nursing it all night long, but you run into a traffic accident that has the street a block away from your apartment blocked off. You turn down the street before it to avoid the accident, and your pace slows as you notice a small coffee shop you’ve never seen before.

Obviously, it’s cheaper for you to go home and drink what you already have, but your feet carry you to the glass door. As you step inside a wave of calm crashes over you, refreshing your tired limbs and pulling you toward the long wooden counter. The place smells like espresso and croissants, and you see a small table that’s perfect for you to work at. As you step up to order you notice that the barista is an incredibly handsome, scruffy haired man and you shift your weight nervously. Even after being in New York for a month, you still aren’t used to how many beautiful people live here. Every time you pass a supermodel or an actor, your jaw drops. And this man looks like he could have both of those careers.

He’s writing something down as you slide a hand across the countertop, and the movement catches his attention momentarily. He doesn’t look up at you, his hand still scribbling on a piece of paper, but he asks, “What can I get ya?”

“Um, just a 12 oz-,” you start as he drops his pen and glances up at you. Your voice dies in your throat, disappearing as you stare at him. The contrast between his dark beard, and his light blue eyes is stark but stunning. You gulp audibly and the corner of the beautiful man’s mouth tugs up into a crooked smirk. Catching yourself, you drop your gaze to the counter and blink quickly. “A 12 oz latte and a chocolate croissant.”

His fingers tap on the cash register and you dig in your purse to find your wallet. “That’ll be $4.50,” you can feel your cheeks flushing under his gaze.

“Oh, uh, isn’t the croissant worth that much alone?” you ask, pulling your card out.

“Yeah, it is. But you look like you need the coffee more than the store needs the money,” he comments, a sly smile framing his words.

“I-, I’ll pay for both,” you stumble, holding your card out.

He takes it from you, reading your name on the card carefully. “You just did,” he smiles and hands the card back to you before tapping on the register again.

“No, no, I can’t let you do that,” you shove your card back towards him.

“Can’t let me do what?” he asks as he grabs a plate and mug.

“What-, what you’re doing. I won’t let you make that for me,” you say, pointing at the chocolate croissant he’s picking up.

“Who said this was for you?” He tilts his head to the side as his gaze narrows. The crinkles that form around his eyes makes you nearly go weak in the knees. “I’m making this for me.”

“Hey lady, get out of the line,” a middle aged man says from behind you. You glance over your shoulder, giving the man an apologetic look.

“Yeah lady.” You turn back to the barista that’s got your heart nearly beating out of your chest. “Go sit down,” he says as he points at the table you were eyeing.

“I-, I don’t-.”

“Seriously?” the angry man says, taking a step toward the counter and nearly shoving you out of the way.

You glare at him, all your politeness having evaporated, and throw your hands up defensively, “I’m going.”

“Right over there,” the barista says, pointing at the table again. You turn your glare on him and he grins victoriously at you. Another barista walks behind him and he shifts his attention from you to the man at the counter, amusement disappearing from his features. “Next.”

After taking a seat at the small table in the corner of the shop, you pull out the printed draft of the novel you’re editing and a black pen. You’re writing a comment on page three when your generous barista approaches you.

“I warmed up the croissant,” he says as he places the plate and mug in front of you. “And if you have any complaints about your service, you can bring them up with me personally.”

You roll yours eyes at his words, leaning back in your seat, “My complaint is that you wouldn’t take my freaking money.”

“Hold on,” he responds, holding his finger up to you as the other barista calls to him. The young woman calls him Bucky, and you find yourself leaning forward, curiosity pulling at your brain.

He turns back to you, his brows furrowing as he clasps his hands together in a plea, “My break is in 20 minutes and I’ll be more than happy to sit and listen to all your complaints with my full attention then.” You want to turn him down but the charming smile that transforms his features from brooding and handsome to devilishly enchanting keeps you frozen in your spot, butterflies already tickling your stomach. You pretend to appear angry, but when you don’t respond he winks at you, and you feel a tightening in your chest.

Maybe you finally found a person to have a connection with, or maybe your dumbass fell for a pretty face in less than 15 minutes. But either way, watching him work leaves you wondering what you’ve got yourself into.

You’re 12 more pages into the draft, making notes on sentence structure and character descriptions, when you hear the chair across from you scrape against the floor. Bucky sits on it backwards and watches you with an amused smirk.

“I see you liked the croissant,” he gestures to the plate specked with crumbs.

“Warming it was a nice touch.” He cracks a smug smile and you fight the urge to roll your eyes as you tuck your pen behind your ear. “But there’s no way I’m leaving here without paying for this.”

“What are ya writing on?” he scoots his chair to the side of the table, getting closer to you.

“It’s um, a book I’m editing for work.”

“Oh, that sounds like a fun job.” When you don’t respond he rambles on. “I mean, anything’s better than having to deal with the asshole public. I get yelled at by at least 3 people a day here, and I’m not even the person who helped them.”

“The publishing world’s filled with assholes, they’re just egotistical writers and our bosses instead of the public. But you do make a killer latte.”

“Thank you,” he grins. “Do you write too?”

“I used to, but it’s been a while.”

“(Y/F&L/N), that sounds like an author’s name to me.”

“That used to be the dream,” you say wistfully, staring at the book in front of you, trying to ignore how smoothly your name rolled off his tongue. How nicely it sounded in his voice. “Stop trying to distract me, Bucky. I’m paying you back for the food.”

“There’s no need for you to do that.”

“It’s not about whether I need to do it, it’s that I’m going to do it.”

“You’re really that set on paying me back, huh?” his eyes twinkle with an idea.

“Yes.”

“Okay then, you can pay me back by going to dinner with me.”

“What?”

“How does tomorrow night sound?”

“Um, excuse me?”

“I’m thinking Thai-, do you like Thai?”

“Slow down there.”

“Or do you like Italian? There’s this amazing spot a few bloc-.”

You cut him off by laying your hand on top of his, his eyes darting to you immediately, and you swear you see a hint of anxiety in them. “You seem like a nice guy, Bucky. And this is kinda, um, too fast, and super forward, and I just moved here-.”

“I could show you around,” he offers, his thumb brushing against your hand. Your heart feels like it might explode in your chest.

“While I appreciate that, I’m still getting settled in. Figuring this place out, and I, I’m not looking for a relationship right now.”

“Oh, okay.” The excitement that crinkled the corner of his eyes disappears.

“I don’t really have any friends here, and I don’t want my first connection in this city to be a rushed romantic thing.”

“I get it.” His hand pulls away from yours as he drops his gaze.

Your shoulders slump as your heart finally slows its beating, and you nearly reach for his hand again. You finally find a goddamn connection in this city and you’re already chasing him away on day one. “It’s has nothing to do with you.”

“You don’t have to talk around it. You can just say no.”

“But I’m not saying no to you, I’m saying no to the situation. I don’t really know you, but you seem sweet and you make a mean latte, and that goes a long way in my book. But right now, well it’s just not a good time.”

He glances up at you, features softening again. “It’s okay to say no.”

“Okay Bucky. It’s a no.”

For now.

Tags: @irishdancr24 @suz-123 @thefridgeismybestie @ssweet-empowerment @lostboyinneverland @sophiealiice @wildefire @malletbreaker

I didn’t know who to tag so I just tagged some people???

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asfeedin · 4 years

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Friday Finds & Reader Recommendations – 04-24-2020

Good morning and HAPPY FRIDAY!!! I hope we all have a cozy and wonderful weekend loaded in reading some seriously great books!! Speaking of which…

I’m already almost finished a book I just started a day ago and I LOVE IT!!!!! HOLY. MOLY. It’s the first part of a duet and the next one is coming out in a couple of weeks and I’m so relieved because I know the end of this one will make me crazy. LOL!!! I think I may have just found a new favorite author, and my review will be up this weekend.

In the meantime…

TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT WE FOUND FOR THE WEEKEND !!

STILL ON ➔➔➔ TWO MONTHS FREE KINDLE UNLIMITED DEAL!!! <— If you haven’t tried it yet, now’s your chance. WE ARE LOVING IT! And it’s still going on through the end of April!

And…

So, That Got Weird by Amelia Kingston <—THE AWKWARD GIRL & THE JOCK ALERT!! Ashley loved it so much that she read it again! “…As the reigning campus sex god, he has the playboy act down pat. But underneath those six-pack abs beats a broken heart. He doesn’t trust people and he sure as hell doesn’t believe in love. The odd couple strike a deal. Four weeks of & “tutoring” for five thousand dollars…”

I reread ‘So, That Got Weird’ by Amelia Kingston and that was a fun time – it has the same vibe as Elle Kennedy or Maya Hughes’ books (which I’m a huge fan of).

Third Life by Noelle Adams <—LIVE!! AGE GAP OLDER MAN/YOUNGER WOMAN ALERT!! She only knows his first name but… “...he keeps asking me to meet him all over the world, and I keep saying yes. …I don’t know anything about him except his first name. That’s the way he likes it. He’s too old for me, and he’s hiding secrets, but I’m not going to be able to keep my heart out of it for long…“

Detained by Ainslie Paton <— MONY LOVED THIS ONE!

Mony: I finished Detained by Ainslie Paton, Aussie author. Really loved it!

First chapters – Mystery Guy & female reporter stuck in a Shanghai airport detention room – clever & hot. Characters “real”, dialogue tight – kind of book I like. Also, story unusual & set in China & AUS. Bit too long at end but I wanted to read it in one shot. Love finding books that punch their weight above their GR rating.

This was one of Ann’s “personal 5-star lose all track of time and reality books.”

Master of Salt & Bones by Keri Lake <— LIVE!!! DARK ROMANCE ALERT!!! P.S. I love this author!! “…When I was a little girl, I dreamed a handsome knight would come and rescue me from my wretched mother. He’d ride up on his white steed and break the curse I’ve been fated to carry since the day I was born. Funny how things changed over time. How the fairy tale twisted into something far more crooked, darker than I ever imagined. In reality, my knight is scarred and broken, living alone in a castle of bones that overlooks the sea. He isn’t searching for me. He never was. Lucian Blackthorne is as cursed as I am, and equally shunned by the locals…”

Killian by Ryan Michele <— LIVE!!!

Kitty Valentine Dates a Billionaire by Jillian Dodd <— LIVE!!! JILLIAN DODD ALERT!!

Falling North: A Turner Artist Rocker Novel (The Turner Artist Rocker Series Book 2) by Alyson Santos <— LIVE!!

The Devil in Apartment 13 by Tiana Laveen <— MODERN-DAY URBAN GENIE/JINN IS HER NEW NEIGHBOR… and he wants to make her his mate! “…Vivian Carver believes her name is synonymous with bad luck. She’s a bartender living smack dab in the middle of NYC and has had it up to here with entitled tourists, an annoying roommate and just barely surviving. She’s forced to move into a cheaper apartment, and with it comes a seedy landlord, drippy faucets and a peculiar stranger in apartment 13. Shahzad has pulled all the stops to get to know Ms. Vivian Carver, someone who in no shape, form or fashion understands her full potential…”

Beauty and the Rose: a Dark Romance by Stasia Black & Lee Savino <— LIVE!! TRILOGY CONCLUSION ALERT!!

Don’t Love Me (My Secret Boyfriend Book 1) by S. Doyle <— HE TOLD HER NOT TO… “…The state took me away from my mother when was I twelve and sent me to live with an uncle, who worked on some fancy estate. That’s when I met Ash, she was ten and the daughter of the man who owned the estate. She thought I would be her new best friend but I only wanted to be left alone. For years she was always there, always annoying me, always wanting more from me. But our roles were clear. She was the princess and I was the chauffeur’s charity case. I told her not to fall in love with me…she didn’t listen…”

Dark Protectors Bundle: 3 Stories by Rebecca Zanetti by Rebecca Zanetti <— REBECCA ZANETTI BOOK BUNDLE BARGAIN ALERT! “…From New York Times bestselling author, Rebecca Zanetti, comes three stories in her Dark Protectors-Reese Family series… **Every 1001 Dark Nights novella is a standalone story. For new readers, it’s an introduction to an author’s world. And for fans, it’s a bonus book in the author’s series. We hope you’ll enjoy each one as much as we do.**

The Danger You Know by Lily White <— LILY WHITE’S LATEST DARK READ ALERT!! HE’S HER STALKER…“…I pursue her despite the wedding bells that rang for another, only I can see how she is drowning beneath mediocrity. How many times must I remind her? It can’t matter that I am the person who ruined her life. The man who killed her father. The constant shadow that watches her sleep. The lover who prefers dirty alleyways to freshly laundered sheets. She’s mine. Always has been…”

Michaela: Read this today and loved it!

Michele: I LOVE Lily and Dark reads are still my favorite!! thank you!!!

Tori: I’ve been binge-reading some Lily White lately! Omgah! Just finished The Vanity of Roses and started Wishing Well last night! I guess this one will be next. Seriously, one of my new favorite authors! ♡♡♡

The Prince and the Pawn (When Rivals Play Book 4) by B.B. Reid <— SERIES FINALE!!! BULLY BOOK ALERT! “...They were wrong for each other from the start. The jock and the nerd, what a cliché they made. He was the town prince, and she was a nobody. Tyra Bradley was invisible. That is until she told him he needed some manners, and so began their game of cat and mouse...”

Everything Girl by Emily Mayer <— MONY LOVED IT!! And was her message to the author about it (and the author replied).

Mony: Hi Emily,

Loved loved loved your book. Well written, quirky characters, and great book boyfriend…loved the Montana setting. Good job pacing the slow burn between Jack and Evelyn. A gem.

Hoping you’re thinking about writing a sequel about Ben. Fantastic character – came alive with his wit, charm and “manwhore struggles.” Just begging to be written! What do you think? Thanks!

Emily (the author): …I took a detour for book #2, but I am spending my quarantine with Ben! I couldn’t agree with you more. He definitely needed his own story. I am already a little bit in love with his story and can’t wait to share it with you!

To another reader: “still hoping for a May release date” ..

Jan: New Lucy Score coming out in a couple of days: By A Thread: A Grumpy Boss romcom. I like the grumpy boss trope.

Mony: I didn’t see that By A Thread was about a grumpy boss…one of my favourite tropes as well…

HEY SWEET TEA (The Way To A Man’s Heart Book 8) by Frankie Love <— LIVE!!

Don’t Go Stealing My Heart by Kelly Siskind <— LIVE!!

The Girl and the Stars (The Book of the Ice 1) by Mark Lawrence <— LIVE FANTASY ROMANCE ALERT!!!!! GORGEOUS COVER & TITLE!! “…To resist the cold, to endure the months of night when even the air itself begins to freeze, requires a special breed. Variation is dangerous, difference is fatal. And Yaz is not the same. Yaz’s difference tears her from the only life she’s ever known, away from her family, from the boy she thought she would spend her days with, and has to carve out a new path for herself in a world whose existence she never suspected...”

Pretty Things by Janelle Brown <— RECENT PSYCH-THRILLER RELEASE AND GUESS WHAT????

Nay: For anyone who likes book adaptations, I just saw Maryse’s FB post about Pretty Things by Janelle Brown, and when I went to add it to my tbr on GR, I saw that one of my friends had posted that Nicole Kidman is going to produce and star in the book’s adaptation as a streaming Amazon series.

Maryse: OOOOOH YAY!!!! I love that!! Though I’m going to read it first. Thank you for that news, Nay!

Michele: Just finished Fixed on You series…..GREAT, love, mystery, heartbreak and well the end……it was the best bargain….

Cheryl: Hudson is a hot alpha guy who says right off the bat that he is incapable of love and combined with Alayna’s obsessive “love’ disorder, you just know a train wreck is coming.

Krisztina: I just finished the Fixed trilogy by Laurelin Paige. Hudson (the whole story from his point of view). I have to say that I was reading the 2nd half of Forever With You with tears in my eyes … now I am obsessed with Hudson Pierce

A Kiss to Tell by W. Winters <— SUPER-BARGAIN ALERT! HE WAS BAD NEWS & SHE WAS THE GIRL THAT DIDN’T BELONG… “...From the first time I saw him, Sebastian had a hard stare that pinned me in place. And years later, it hasn’t softened. We lived on the same street and went to the same school, although he was a year ahead. Even so close, he was untouchable. He was bad news and I was the sad girl who didn’t belong. One night changed everything...”

AUDIOBOOK LVERS!

Not a member of Audible yet? Get a free 30 day audible trial (which includes 1 free audiobook + 2 audible originals)

AND! Audiobook Matchmaker!! <— Find out which of YOUR Kindle books are available as audiobooks at a BARGAIN-PRICE! This is how it works. Click on that link & Amazon will show you all of your Kindle books that are also available as an audiobook at a seriously discounted price. This way, you can switch back and forth, seamlessly between your ebooks and your audiobooks. VERY COOL!

➔➔ Audible now has an “Escape” package membership (30 day free trial) – used to be called the “Romance” package <— this one is SO cool, and worth it (unlimited listening for all of the audiobooks in the program, and there are tons – kind of like Kindle Unlimited)!!

and…

Little Secrets by Jennifer Hillier <— RECENT PSYCH-THRILLER RELEASE THAT I’m DYING TO READ!!

Shirley: I’m listening to Little Secrets. I’m at 20% and so far, so good!! I think you would really like this one Maryse!

Maryse: YESSSS!! I know I would. Totally my thing…

The Hardest Fall by Ella Maise <— Ashley loved it so much she listened to it again!

Ashley: Okay, I re-listened to ‘The Hardest Fall’ by Ella Maise. Love it. My favorite part is where her horde of peanut butter m&m’s is discovered and her reasoning for it is one of the most relatable reasons ever.

Shooter by Dahlia West <— Ashley loved it so much she listened to it again!

And I’m also re-listening to ‘Shooter’ by Dahlia West….which makes me want to revisit ‘Preacher’ by Dahlia West.

PREORDERS (going live soon!!! )

➔➔➔ Get Maryse’s Book Blog updates delivered by email (you’ll get one daily email that will have each post from that day consolidated on it).

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