Tumgik
#probably comes free with your mental health
trekkele · 3 months
Text
i saw a post (that was part of a larger thing) that said “anger feels good” and no it doesn’t! I hate how anger makes me feel i hate how it sinks into you and sticks and makes everything and everyone an enemy, everything and everyone someone to hurt and to blame. Anger doesn’t feel good it feels easy and its so easy to sit in it and let it control you and having to claw at your own ribcage to get it out it is so hard, its so fucking hard, and sometimes you’re so tired and you just want it to be easy, just once, just let that anger sit and let it be easy
I don’t have a point here, i just. Anger is easy. Easy doesn’t get shit done around here.
12 notes · View notes
ox1-lovesick · 2 months
Text
hi
#life update nobody asked for lol#I missed you guys my pookie wookie dookies#I deleted all my social media and life is so great wow#still a lot of mental health problems but I'm finally learning to deal with my emotions and not hate life (wow)#is it bad for me to say I'm so glad I left blr#I will probably never come back here lol but I think (?) today is txt's debut anniversary and since I am the self proclaimed empress of moa#downgrading to a flip phone actually#I unstanned txt and all the kpop peoples too (SHOCKER)#I do feel really nostalgic and sad when I think about them but I think it was the thing I needed most#delulu is infact not the solulu#daydreaming about beomgyu being the new student at my school and being soobin's bestie was never the greatest idea hey#it's so freeing to not care about them and focus on what's infront of me#if you need a sign to start growing out of kpop and start worrying about your own life here it is babe 😭 don't let anybody give you shit#Not to say kpop is bad or anything I just think for me it was getting a bit out of hand#As much as we all make fun of the delulus it's so easy to fall down that spiral when these idols constantly tell you they love you#The parasocial relationship was REAL istg these people felt like my friends#Hueningkai does not give a FUCK about me and he is so real for that#Thinking about deleting this blog but I'm logging off after this so I very well may forget it exists again#But I just wanted to share what's been going on#And I miss you guys a lot#I may have outgrown kpop and tumblr but you all still have a special place in my heart#I miss the good old days 😭 when discord let's me back in I might visit wme#Not much has changed with me but mentally I feel like a whole new person#But I hope you all are doing GREAT#Living your best lives and doing things that make you happy#You owe it to yourself more than you owe these celebrities anything#xoxo savie 😝🤟🤟🔥🔥🔥
19 notes · View notes
thebibliosphere · 1 month
Text
Whenever I talk about the medical neglect and ableism I've encountered as a victim of the healthcare system, there's always some cockwaffle who feels entitled to come into my inbox and make the argument of "not all doctors" while talking about how "people like them" (because it's always someone in a field of medicine who does this) are doing their best and it's really hard because so many people fake being ill to get on welfare (Yikes), but like, yeah, obviously #not all doctors, because if all doctors were negligent, bullying scum bags, I'd be dead.
But here's the thing: while I truly believe that the majority of doctors are doing their best in a system stacked against them and their patients, their presence does not negate the mass harm caused by the bad ones. And there are far more bad ones than you realize.
Fuck, John Oliver literally did a segment on this last week:
youtube
Yes, the truly bad, malicious doctors are in the minority. Most are just horrifically burned out and fighting a losing battle against a system, killing both them and their patients through a lack of funding and resources and profound overwork.
But the malicious ones do exist, and they will go out of their way to harm patients who don't kowtow to them.
I almost lost my life because when I was in my early twenties, I told a doctor I didn't think she was listening to me, and I disagreed with her assessment of my mental health (she was not a mental health doctor, and I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain). She retaliated by putting "non-compliant" in my file.
There was also a fun little "doesn't show respect" note too that lives rent-free in my head because I know I wasn't rude. I was polite. I just didn't agree with her, and my refusal to accept her off-handed comment that "you probably have bipolar or BPD" (again, I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain) meant I was "refusing care."
I wasn't. I just refused to be slapped with a mood/personality disorder when I was there because I kept fucking fainting when I stood up.
(Spoiler alert: it was dysautonomia)
That "non-compliant" marker followed me around for years. It followed me across an ocean and effectively ensured that any doctor I saw was going to treat me like absolute dogshit because no one wants to help Difficult Patients. It wasn't until I was so undeniably ill, literally on the brink of death, that anyone helped me.
I'm alive because of a good doctor. And all the good ones that came after him because of him.
So, I know they exist. You don't have to tell me that.
But I really fucking need you to acknowledge the bad ones and that you're part of a system with a long, long history of abusing minorities and vulnerable people. I need you to acknowledge that because it's the only way we're going to survive this godforsaken nightmare and make things better.
So yeah, #notalldoctors, but if you feel the need to say that because someone talking about being literally left to die by the medical system hurts your feelings, I'm going to have to ask you to take a step back and ask yourself if you're going into medicine for the right reasons.
Namely: do you want to help people, even the "difficult" ones?
Even the ones who might disagree with you?
Even if they're on welfare?
Even if they'll never get "better" in a way that means "cured"?
Just a thought. But hey, what do I know. I'm just someone who experienced hemolytic anemia because doctors kept telling me I was anxious and needed to exercise more 🤷‍♀️.
3K notes · View notes
harmoonix · 6 months
Text
☾ Night - Diamond ☽
• Astrology Observations •
Tumblr media
🌆 - Is very Risky trying to lie on 8th house placements or Scorpio Moons, because when they trust you, they do it 100% if you break their trust, hardly you take it back..
🌆 - Venus/Mercury and Sun or Saturn in the 10th house can have a great reputation and can be seen as a "role model" for others
🌆 - Mars or Pluto in the 7th house can attract jealousy in their relationship, and with that can also come people who may try to break up the natives
🌆 - Libra and Gemini Venus/Moons can be very flirty when you try to know then more/deeper, sometimes it can happen to flirt without noticing
🌆 - Something I observed about the Venus/Moon in the 6th house is that they need reassurance when they are in love or in a serious relationship
Tumblr media
🌆 - Sagittarius Sun/Moon/Mercury are the best to have around for their great humour and their unique jokes
🌆 - Mercury at 6°. 18° degrees may like to talk about mental health issues, they may also be the people who help others with opening up about their issues
🌆 - Sometimes Saturn in the 5th/7th house can experience rejection. In case you do, that is a sign from Saturn to be more aware of something
Is not the right time for that
That person may not be the one for you
The rejection may help you to discover things about that person
🌆 - People who don't really believe in astrology do not have not their 3rd eye open enough or they don't trust the higher plan enough to believe it
Tumblr media
🌆 - Juno in Aquarius/11th house are the cutest when it comes to making a good relationship with their partners. Because they rely on free expressing and freedom
🌆 - South Node in your 8th house may experience a lot of deja-vu in their current life and aswell can experience states of being very intuitive about it
🌆 - Scorpio Risings are the best when it comes to hiding their true emotions/feelings so they would not get hurt in case there is someone who has a bad eye upon them
🌆 - Saturn aspecting Chiron can indicate issued with their father or with the older authorities in their lives
Tumblr media
🌆 - Neptune at 1°, 13°, 25° degrees may doubt themselves a lot, they think that they are not enough, you are good in your own way, and you don't have to doubt yourself you are worth it.
🌆 - Sun/Moon in the 11th house can find gaming or games as a hobby, a thing that gives them a good vibe and a good state of mind
🌆 - Virgo Moons may need to practice a lot of self - healing if they need to recover from any traumas they had experienced
🌆 - When someone with Cancer or Leo Placements acts like a child around you, don't judge them, probably their inner kids feel safe with you
🌆 - Taurus Venus/Moon/Risings may like to make a lot of physical contact with their lovers/partners or in their relationship
🌆 - Capricorn Sun/Moon/Rising are having the stereotype of being an "old soul", so they may have really good advices or tips when it comes to life lessons
Tumblr media
🌆 - Mercury in Sagittarius/Pisces may have captivating voices, they are giving poetic voice, someone who may be poetic/artistic/dreamy in the terms of voice
🌆 - Asteroid Eros (433) aspecting Mars is an indicator of being very erotic. Very sexual,sensual intimate and intense, ofc the tighter the orb the more intensely you feel these
🌆 - Asteroid Eros at 4°, 16°. 28° degrees may give an flow of innocence when you first met them, you can be ethereal with these degrees on your love asteroids. Also their eyes make you to fall more in love
🌆 - Try to make your Uranus persona chart to see what unexpected things you can experience in your life, for example having Venus in your 7th house in your Uranus Persona chart can mean you can have unexpected relationships
🌆 - Aquarius/Aries and Pisces Moons may have different taste in music 🎵 and they can also listen to multiple music genres like one second you catch them listening to pop, the next second they can listen rock or other genre of music
Tumblr media
🌆 - Lilith in Libra Degrees (7°, 19°) charm people with their beauty, is giving femme fatale vibes with these degrees+ Lilith combined, you may also have gorgeous hair
🌆 - Gemini/Scorpio in the 6th house can have more 1 pet, I feel like most people with this placement can have more pets in their home or the desire to have more than 1 pet
🌆 - People with their Mercuries in Aries Degrees (1°,13°,25°) can talk really fast, like they put a lot of energy in this and can end up with everyone saying "sorry can you repeat? you talk too fast"
🌆 - Having Uranus - Juno aspects feels is having a vibe close to this "I never knew there was someone so special like you out there in the world" - They can find their partner/spouse so so so special and is so cute
🌆 - Neptune - Venus aspects can sometimes indicate getting in a state of delusion when you are in love, you can even create fake scenarios in your head about your crushes/lovers
Tumblr media Tumblr media
🌆☽ - It's a new day and that means a new post for me to you 🦋, I hope you have it good and you're fine 🦋 🌆☾
☽ I hope everyone who reads my notes has a good day full of light and good vibes, and the most important. To love yourself ☾
🌆☽ Yours truly, Harmoonix ☾🌆
2K notes · View notes
Text
Francis mosses x fem! reader
thick as blood
sweet as milk
Tumblr media
"god i am down bad" you groaned getting up getting into the shower, it was.....nasty, the grout and limescale made a public bathroom seem more hygienic
but you didn't have time to think about it so you cleaned up and got out trying your best to not touch a thing, you looked over the makeup guidelines for your uniform, it had to be exact in order for the agents that came in to not suspect you. matching foundation no eyeshadow, black mascara and complimentary blush with matching lip stick
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
you looked in the mirror one last time before rushing out.
7 am sharp you sat at your desk watching Francis be the first heading out the door giving a small wave to you, your heart fluttered waving back. a few more residents left leaving you with a bit too much free time. most of them wouldn't come back till lunch and as stupid as dopples are for them to appear now is suicide, you look around and see a letter at your desk so you open it
dear agent 591138 it has come to my attention that no one has filled you in on your working conditions fully so I am here to do it for you. your working hours are 7am to 10 pm every full week then you will get the following work week off, we understand this is rather confusing but just know your best interest is our priority (among other things) this gives you time for recreational activities and self mental care. you do know how everything in the office works but we did just throw a gun to you like a baby. your DDD issued pistol has DDD issued bullets so we can verify the killing of the dopples or in serious cases murder of innocent civilians. an agent will contact you intermittently to check your mental health. best regards , agent 907811
what a letter. did they call you a baby with a gun? your 25.
you decided to open the filing cabinet under your desk to place the letter just to find it riddled with boxes of said bullets. you place it over them and close it staring straight into your reflection of the glass "ok lets just breath and get through it" you assured yourself before reaching into your bag for a bagel and milk, odd combination yes but its what you had in your icebox. you started to worry about your food supplies through the week from what you remember you had bread some fruit jam and POSSIBLY not rotten eggs to hold you over but you knew for a fact a grown person was not going to survive on jelly sandwiches. you looked to the phone wanting to call a cousin that lived nearby to get you some things but you decided against it for now, maybe at the end of your shift you could leave them a message with the operator. soon the middle of the day came and Nacha came in with her daughter looking rather feverish "hi so sorry we had to come back in early she's coming down with something" Nacha slid both their papers and ids through the slot holding her baby close, you looked over the info and all was in order. you even studied them and before opening the door "maybe a doctor would help more?" you asked not wanting to sound mean " oh we went to the pharmacy right before coming here, they said its probably something the kids are passing around" nacha responded happily, this woman was really upbeat it almost scares you " oh good, get better kiddo" her daughter coughed a quiet "whatever" before her mom chastised her passing the now opened door.
you looked to their papers, specifically Anastacha's.... then your stomach dropped. her eyes. her stand offish demeanor yesterday and today, you had a sinking feeling about her relationship to Francis but you weren't sure so you decided to drop the idea for now...
2 dopples came in, horrible replication so you just dropped the shutter and called the moment they spoke.
the phone rang and you picked up "hello, this is agent 907811 the one that sent the letter" the voice was manly but upbeat (imagine Gladiolus from final fantasy 15) you nodded to no one "oh hello, a little unprofessional to make wellness calls in the middle of my shift no?" you asked playfully to test the waters on the guy " intermittently, remember?" he said matching energy "noticed you got 2 already, might get more not to jinx ya" you hummed in agreement as he continued "anyway to make it easier for you instead of calling us and explaining the situation I want you to just say my name and ill know to send our boys in yellow, to save time and lives right?" he kind of lingered on the right so on que you answered "right." "great! ok the names rex." he spoke quick "wait really?" you asked absent for a minute "well no my real name is classified but everyone calls me rex, and whenever you dial 3312 it puts you straight to me~" he made you smile hearing his happiness so you giggled "well ok will do rex, time to get back to work" "yes ma'am" you heard hanging up. dreamboat was infront of you already sliding his papers to you "sorry about that Mr. Mosses" you read over the file, a blush overcoming you "boyfriend?" he asked catching you off guard "n-no, the DDD" you almost got up to let him know you were serious but fixed your seating position instead "mmm...ok" you thanked your god he had very prevalent verbal ques, made your job easy "were do you get your milk from?" he asked taking back his papers "my old apartment, believe it or not the DDD moved me in yesterday with everything I had" you chuckled thinking he took his job a little too serious and didn't want enemy milk on his turf "i give you milk now." he almost declared in an odd way. you turned red imagining unholy thoughts "the farm i deliver for also delivers here. the buildings day is Monday but ill grab a case for you tomorrow" he walked in before you could even form the words thank you but on instinct you shut the door behind him.
you tried to calm your blush to no avail, the way he just announced his caring for you! the way he said it made you swoon "i give you milk now" god it was weirdly hot!! you almost swore you heard a bit of a Russian accent when he said it. you kept holding your face praying to go back to your natural color "doll you look like a tomato" another male voice said "oh Mr. Gauss, I apologize its just allergies" you looked away for a minute before doing the usual "its winter. your a horrible liar" he tapped the glass teasingly "all is well, good day Mr. Gauss" you spoke restrained trying not to be angry with the fact he had no issue calling you a liar opening the door for him "see you later doll". you sat there a little peeved to say the least, munching on your slightly stale bagel you continue your shift.
the next morning you woke up to knocking, your heart raced putting on your robe and ran to the door opening it "its 7:30" francis looked down at you looking almost disappointed "oh my god really?? shit thank you for waking me up" you left the door wide open as you rushed to put on a fresh uniform and stuffing your makeup bag in your purse. francis watched you rush from bed to bath sighing and looking around, he placed down five bottles of milk on your counter and opened your ice box "how pitiful" he spoke looking at the carton of barely any eggs and a few rotting veggies. he took it upon himself to leave a milk out and put the rest in making you a single piece of toast. you looked actually quite presentable considering your rushing you walked towards the door hitting something hard "ow" at first you were going to cry because Francis just watched you almost break your nose but you looked up to see him looking down. god did he smell good. like bourbon and vanilla, thank god axe body spray wasn't invented yet. "I made you toast. I have to get to work." he furrowed his brows at the last bit and left you, you look to the counter to see well enough he set the toast with jam on a small plate and a glass of milk at your table.
days had passed and soon it was your friday
it was almost 10 pm but you had to stay an extra hour because the twin models were at a party. you've never really had a full conversation with them but they were nice to you even complimented you on your hair once, finally they came in beautiful gowns that made you get up to see them fully "y/n! so sorry it took so long!" Selenne said raising her hands up air hugging you from the glass which made you chuckle "its my job to see your safe return, beautiful dresses by the way" you placed your hand on the glass to match hers "why thank you, we'll show you the details in a bit" Elenois smiled passing their papers to you, you matched them up everything being in order "you should come to a party with us" selenne jumped a little visibly annoying her twin "sel she has a job to do. a stressful one at that she doesn't need more comingling with the upper-class that watches your every move" elenois huffed taking the ids back "oh actually my days off start tomorrow" you smiled "oh. nevermind, wanna wear airtight dresses and flirt with politics?" elenois laughed making you raise an eyebrow smiling, selenne slapped her sisters shoulder giggling "shes a little tipsy, yakn-" the girls went silent. all of you looking to your left to see it.
a dopple.
a twin dopple.
it was horrifying. a giant sharp mouth filled its face, no eyes no nose it snarled stretching its arm out to the girls as they screamed. you quickly opened the door hearing your own heart beat quicken with every thought, "get in the office NOW" you yelled banging on the glass to get thier attention, they did as told rushing passed El pushing her sister in forcing Sel onto the office floor next to you. the dopple sprung passed the door before you could shut it, it tripping and grabbing onto elenois' leg with its yellow claws you ran up your mind swimming from thier screams, you punched the side of its head forcing it to go down before turning its attention to you. you grappled with it on the floor yelling at the girls to get a grip and lock the main and office door, they were trembling...blood from Els leg soaking her dress as she held selenne nodding to you closing the door and locking the main one from the office. you were bloody , your fist scrapped its teeth cracking the bone a bit as you threw it againt the door earning another scream from the twins it snarled and screeched as you ran towards the stairs unclipping your gun from its holster going up a floor "all residence stay in your homes a dopple is in the building" you yelled repeating the phrase as you heard them all scamble yelling and some of the men even starting to descend the staircase before you hit the first step. the monster stood before you on the bottom step bleeding from its maw "YoU pICk uP A GOosd fiIIgHT MakeSS yoU moRe DeLishessssss" you trembled aiming "Fuck You" POW POW the pistol shot hitting its stomach, its screeches hurt your ears but you slowly backed away as it crawled to reach you it was fast ripping off quite a bit of your skirt as you kept pilling the trigger knowing it had no more than 8 rounds finally it hit its chest making the thing go down by the second floor.
you laid there on the steps breathing heavy hearing almost nothing as everyone crowded around you asking questions and tending to your leg, but you heard nothing.
you got up pushing poor mia to the side backing down stairs passed the body pulling it by the leg to the main floor and leaving it at the end of the steps, everyone but Nacha and nat following for obvious reasons. you walked to the office opening it with your key seeing the twins holding one another sobbing looking up at you, they smilied running up and hugging you close you could start to hear their voices thanking god and thanking you...the gun was still in your hand so you walked passed them slowly sitting in your chair and placing the gun on the desk everyone ran to the girls to inspect them as you dailed the number "....rex....i had to kill it in front of all of them.." you croaked "coming now kid hold on" his voice sounded shaky but you were still processing everything the smell of blood and what seemed like rot, the stinging sensation of your cuts and bruises...the sounds of your residence begging you to answer them. oh.
you breathed in a sharp breath finally being able to sense everything "please step away from the body" you stated to the mcoolys looking over at it "you really killed it" the older one spoke in shock "oh dear your skirt " gloria took off her head scarf to cover you but francis stopped her taking off his wrobe and placing it over you "the ...blood" you managed to get out "fuck the blood right now" he stated mia dressed you in it as the twins blocked you making sure your panty hose were no longer exposed, all of the men looking away either in respect or fear of thier wives.
DDD came escorting everyone upstairs as the other half stayed downstairs to clean up "didnt think we'd meet this way" you looked up from the chair the shmidts brought out for you to sit as DDD officers looked over your wounds. it was rex. a taller man in casual business attire with salt n pepper hair "you did good kid, you saved those girls and the rest of them" he held out his hand to you , you shook it nodding "thank you" he nodded back letting go to speak with a yellow suit qietly "well it seems theres no fatal injuries on any of you , they dressed your wounds so now you rest" rex looked down at you . some would say you looked like a beaten dog but maybe that was just rex "your one tough bitch y/n." he walked off with the hazmats in tow, "i think its time for you to rest baby...you look close to passing out" gloria squeezed your arm as your eyes fluttered, you were passing out and fast "ill take her home" francis spoke up "and we'll stay with her" El and Sel spoke together "she cant sleep in those clothes" el added , everyone agreed as francis picked you up slowly treating you like glass to your apartment the scent of his shampoo and his warmth made you pass out holding him tighter
you could almost hear him stiffle a tear as he held you closer.
end part 2
Tumblr media
457 notes · View notes
mygalriri · 11 months
Text
ASTROLOGY OBSERVATIONS
I am not a professional astrologer. Some things I say may not resonate with everyone. However, if it doesn't resonate with you, I'd love to hear about your experience. If there are any professional astrologers who find fault with what I've said, feel free to correct me. I am open to constructive criticism. This is my first astro observations post though, so being nice is suggested. 😁
Tumblr media
1. Moon Square Ascendant people may not be very expressive. Like their expression at all times is either "🙂" or "😐" 2. I don't know why but almost all Virgo risings tend to smile awkwardly in selfies, I've noticed this with celebrities too, either they smile awkwardly or don't smile at all I'm a Virgo rising and I cannot smile naturally in selfies at all like ughhh 3. Undeveloped Mars in Pisces men struggle to come in terms with their femininity and want to be seen as this "alpha male" that is overly masculine; often times being damaging to their mental health. Also prone to promiscuity sometimes. 4. Venus in Scorpios can be mean to the people they like at first but will gradually start to grow a soft spot just for the person they like. I've also noticed that they keep making excuses just to see or talk to the person they like. 5. No idea what the reason behind this is, but when your Moon sign matches someone's Sun sign, chances are you like their cooking. My mom and I have this placement combo (she has gemini sun and i have gemini moon and i have taurus sun and she has taurus moon) and we like eachother's cooking. 6. I know y'all have probably heard this a million times in other astro observations, but I'm gonna say it anyway cause it resonates with me. 12th house stellium in a Solar Return chart could mean a year of isolation. I had to ghost the people that I was talking to on a daily basis almost immediately after my solar return. 7. A lot of people think that venus is now you crush on someone AND how you approach them but I think that isn't true. Venus is how you crush on someone and Mars is how you approach/confess to them. I have Mars in Cancer and I had crushes on two women (not at the same time lol) who have Mars in Taurus which is considered to be a weak sign for Mars and I could sense that they liked me too but we never ended up confessing to each other. 8. Having the same Venus sign as someone's Mars sign indicates a strong attraction at first sight, I have Venus in Taurus and as you read from the previous point I can attest to this lol. 9. Jupiter in Gemini, especially men, can be shorter. This is because Jupiter represents expansion, growth and abundance and it is detrimental in Gemini. Jupiter in Capricorn can be applied to men as well but I feel it applies to women more 10. Pluto in 6th house in a SR chart can mean major changes in your lifestyle, since Pluto represents transformation and the 6th house represents how you go about your daily life.
That's all for now. Hope y'all enjoyed it. See you later, folks!
1K notes · View notes
Text
Uranus and why your life is a ShiT ShoW > URANUS IN Yer HOUSe <
Tumblr media
Uranus in the FIrst - You are the most unpredictable little fuck-head that everyone loves. They always change > there clothes, there direction in life > their hair colour. they thrive in change unless you try to change them, they are the ones changing and dont you dare change them, thats all they have left ;( Uranus in the Second. - Crazy self esteem issues. these people think they are the greatest then the worst person, also same applies to their income because they dont think they are worth much, until they invest into bitcoin and think they will be the next warren buffet. honestly the only thing stable about you is the perception of your value changing. But they love change, something to look forward to i guess Uranus in the Third your brain and communication skills are kinda fucky you know that dont you. you always know how to say something shocking, and extremely good at changing the subject of a conversation, like you dont have to say much, but what you do say just made everyone go huh what the fuck you say? its amusing tho we appreciate you Uranus in the F4urth - Emotionally avoidant, dependent, and attached personalities. They cant make their mind up on how they feel, so they experiemnt with every feeling to see if they vibe with that. mum was probably very unpredictable, and they wanna be like her. they just trying their best to forgive her <3 Uranus in the Fifth - Okay this one is the genius. This one people actually think your onto something when your showing off because you break free of every social convention, and archetype, but in the most perfect way. everyone believes your special, and you can change the vibe of a room like dat Uranus in the Sixth - what a fkn mess your life is. I had this one friend who would have 10 different drinks in his room and he would drink each one sparingly (they were all warm too). he had some serious health issues, and lets not get into his mental health okay. but yall have crazy lives and you make it that way Uranus in the Seventh - Im not a player i just fuck a lot. they choose their partners based off how interesting they are, if you can satiate their curiosity you got em. but if your boring or not worth figuring out yeah g-bye. also they just come off strange so everyone is extremely curious. they get projected on a lot but they dont mind its a good way to find out something interesting lol Uranus in the Eighth - Freaks who will do anything.... and im not just talking about sex, if they want something they'll find any way to get it. masters of attainment, even if its probably not healthy for them, they don't care if they want it they get it. then the object of their fixation changes as soon as they do get it. they are like obsessed with 'progress' but its hard to call it that sometimes Uranus in the Ninth - Clever minds who are always skipping segments of a speech, or a video to find the juicy parts. They have very quick minds that are so easily bored, but if you talk to them, they'll never not have something interesting to talk about. also when change does occur its a LOt Uranus in the Tenth - why are yalll like this. just baffling people like they know how to make an entrance and when everyone starts loooking at them, they decide to make fun of everyone by doing something a lil bit too shocking, almosst making fun of you for looking at them. gets off on shocking ya Uranus in the Eleventh - They wanna change the world, but not in a way that is practical. until it is. They have a million friends because they have a knack for understanding people, but when you ask what they want or what scares them. it just makes you rethink why your even friends with them in the first place. 12 - your crazy. and its endearing but everyone is this close to calling the cops on you or locking you up in a psyche ward. maybe tone down your retardation. we all got something going on but you take it to a whole new level.
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
buckyalpine · 1 year
Text
A little longer
Tumblr media
HI MY BEAUTIFUL 🐚ANON!! I adore this so much, I adore YOU so much, as always, your requests are everything!! 
Warnings: So so much fluffy fluff, angst if you really squint till your eyes go cross-eyed and blurry
-
"It's been decades. Not even a couple years. Almost a century. You probably shoot dust. Or whatever your bionic ass reproduces with"
Bucky contemplated throwing his half finished milkshake at Sam's head while they both scarfed down burgers from a late night diner after a taxing mission. Sam was pestering Bucky yet again about his nonexistent social and lack of a love life, a topic he seemed to get high off of. 
“For fucks sake Sam-”
"You need to get out more man, at least start dating. You don't need a whole girlfriend but a few dates wouldn't kill you. Or maybe it would, since you're what, 106?"
Bucky groaned, rubbing a hand over his face, his patience wearing thin. Dating wasn’t for him, not because he didn’t want to date but because he wasn’t sure who would even date him. He’d only just gotten comfortable talking to Sam though he’d never openly admit he actually enjoyed their conversations. He wasn’t exactly the most approachable, Peter had once told him he had a resting bitch face, whatever that meant. He wasn’t the most tech savvy unless it involved doing something illegal. He had a plethora of devices that could take down the US government at the push of a button he secrecy hoarded under his bed but God forbid someone ask him to pose for their Instagram story.  
Talking to a pretty girl was a completely different story. What would he even talk about? His time before the war involved a lot of nursing an injured or sick Steve back to health. After the war and his time in Hydra, he didn’t really have time for himself. He liked plums. The hobbit. He was thinking about getting a cat. Bucky internally groaned, maybe he’d find a girlfriend at the retirement home down the street; at least they’d have things in common. 
Sam cocked an eyebrow while Bucky narrowed his eyes at him. Usually he’d respond with a grumpy pout or complete silence but today his exhaustion had caught up with him. He debated on how to get Sam of his back, a dim, flickering, half broken bulb going off in his sleep deprived brain. 
"I already have a girlfriend Tweety bird"
The deafening silence that followed that statement made it clear both men were aware that was a lie. Sam snorted, shaking his head while they both finished they food, slapping a $50 on the counter before leaving. He looked at the super soldier, deciding not to press into the issue further for the night but he definitely wasn’t going to let it go that easily. 
5:30 AM
The buzz of his phone jolted him awake, the faint sound of the TV still playing in the background. Bucky felt around for his phone, tossing his sheet off, sitting up from his place on the floor seeing Sam’s caller ID light up the screen. 
“What are you doing next Saturday” Sam sounded unusually chipper, a hint of a smirk in his voice, a suspicious amount of enthusiasm for such an early hour. 
“Why” Bucky groaned, rubbing sleep from his eyes, going back to lying down. 
“Were having a cookout over the weekend, you should come”
“You woke me up to tell me what could have been a text message?” Bucky asked incredulously, closing his eyes, ready to let sleep free him from such a ridiculous conversation. 
“Ooo, white panther knows how to text now” 
“White Wolf” Bucky grumbled, regretting every telling Sam the name he had been given in Wakanda. “I’ll come if you just let me go back to sleep” 
"Alright, but bring your girl too"
There it was. 
He could feel the shit eating grin Sam was giving him over the phone, eye brows wigging up and down, all his perfect teeth out. 
“Whatcha say Barnes?” 
Sleep had disappeared into thin air as Bucky shot up, mentally kicking himself for the nonsense he’d gotten himself into. He fiddled with the corner of his sheet, hoping to find an out. 
"I thought you only invited family" 
"Hey, anyone that you're allowing within 3 feet of your personal space might as well be considered family" Sam snorted, not believing a single word Bucky had said the night before. The conversation moved on to a different topic, easing some of Bucky’s nerves. A whole hour had passed and Bucky was sure he was in the clear until-  
“Back to the matter at hand, you bringing her or not?” 
“Why are you like this, does being Captain America always come with the caveat with also being a pain in my ass, I’m not going to-”
Bucky was about to refuse until a knock at the door pulled him away from the conversation, the scent of fresh pancakes wafting through the door. He pulled himself up, a smile tugging on his lips, knowing exactly who was on the other side, not needing to check as he untangled himself from the sheets. 
His sweet neighbor. 
Bucky wasn’t religious and he wasn’t a big believer in a higher power but there had to be something out there when people like you existed. Whenever Sam asked him why he stayed in the dingy little apartment that barely had windows and a closet for a bedroom, he’d insist it was because he preferred a small space and was still getting used to living a normal life so he wasn’t ready for another move just yet. 
The part he always left out was that his dingy apartment came with an absolute angle that lived next door. Kind hearted. Sweet. An absolute darling. You were one of the first people he’d interacted with when he moved in. All the nerves he had about living alone and growing accustomed to a regular life melted away the first day, when you came over with a plate of fresh cookies. 
He felt like a little boy whenever you were around, having the biggest crush on the prettiest girl on the playground, his mind going to mush whenever you smiled at him. But it wasn’t a crush. Nope. No....? No. He narrowed his eyes at himself before making his way to the door. 
“Buck? Did your tongue rust-” 
“I’ll uh-I’ll think about it” He mumbled before cutting the call, a bashful smile on his face as he unhooked the chain and swung the door open. “G’morning doll” 
“Good Morning” You grinned, handing Bucky the plate which he gratefully accepted, his stomach rumbling between the butterflies that fluttered in his tummy. “I heard you get in last night, didn’t think you’d have time to do a grocery run or cook anything” You handed him a bag of fruits and vegetables, two of those bags full of plums. His favorite. 
“You didn’t have to do all this” If his cheeks grew any warmer he would’ve sworn he was running a fever. And he didn’t get fevers. 
“You’re out saving the world, I think getting you a few groceries is the least I could do. So, how’s the new Captain?” You had never met Sam in person but hearing enough stories from Bucky told you all you needed to know. No one else was better suited to take on the shield than him. 
“A pain in my ass even if he means well” Bucky smiled shaking his head to himself. “He’s been pestering me to get out more...start dating” He mumbled the last part, wincing. He’d fought off aliens, gone to battle alongside a tree and a talking raccoon, survived being help captive by Hydra but being boyfriend material? His flirting game was as strong as pre serum Steve's right hook. 
“Well, handsome solider like you, shouldn’t be too hard to find you a date” You felt your own face heat up as soon as the words left your mouth but wasn’t like it was a secret. There was no way he would have had trouble in the dating department; aside from being one of the most beautiful people you’d laid your eyes on he was also the sweetest. Bucky was nothing but a gentleman and with a pure and soft heart and if you didn’t get your shit together and control the way he made you weak in the knees-
“Not the same ladies man I was in the 40′s doll” He chuckled, blue eyes sparkling at your compliment, “Either way, I got myself into a mess with that” He smiled sheepishly while you cocked your head, urging him to continue. 
“Well, I sort of lied to get him off my case” Bucky blushed, rubbing the back of his head, his the pink on his cheeks deepening at your cheeky smile. “I-I told him I already have a girlfriend but as you can see-” Bucky waved into his empty apartment that showed no signs of human life, “-it back fired immediately because he's invited my nonexistent girlfriend to a cookout this weekend. In Louisiana. With all his family. And friends”
Bucky let his head hit the wall with a dull thump, cursing himself for putting a foot in his mouth. Sure he could just come clean and say he lied. But that would mean admitting he lied and that was worse because then Sam would give him shit for that, plus try to get him out more and- 
“What if- what if I went with you?” Bucky’s head shot up, blinking in surprise at your words, wondering if he heard you correctly. “I could pretend to be your girlfriend for a day, get Cap off your case. Only if you’re comfortable with it though”
“Really? You’d do that?” You giggled at his lost puppy expression, his eyes lighting up when he realized you were being serious.
“Of course” You smiled sincerely,  “I’d be happy to! Just let me know what time to be ready at and I’ll be all yours” 
All his.  
The little boy in his was running around in circles, his heart beating too fast for the rest of his body to keep up. The thought of you being his girlfriend for a day was more than he could ever dream of. Of course it was only pretend and he’d wouldn’t dare push for more; not when you deserved the world. At the very least, he wouldn’t have to deal with Sam’s nagging. 
Problem solved. 
*****
This was a bad idea. 
A bad, bad idea. 
Bucky had gone through at least 4 outfits, debating between an array of Henley’s, before settling on a blue one when he remembered you complimented it because it was blue like his eyes. He picked up his razor and then immediately put it down when he remembered you once said you liked the scruff on him.  Even if this was just pretend, every single part of him was on edge as if this were a real date. As soon as his enhanced hearing picked up your soft footsteps padding down the hall, he was right by the door, nervously chewing his lip. 
Bucky blinked, his heart nearly giving way at 106 years old when he saw you make your way down the hall towards his apartment. You were in a flowery sundress, with a large cakebox in hand, your sweet perfume already making him dizzy. If Sam didn’t kill him for lying, the crush he had on you would be the next thing to take him out. 
"You-you look beautiful"  And sweet. And adorable. And delectable. 
An angel.
You looked like an angel. 
"Thank you, you look good too Sarge" You looked down at Bucky’s chest instead of meeting his eyes, unable to look at his pretty face. His adorable face. Handsome face. That dimple on his chin. Blue eyes. Pink lips. Fuck, you had such a big crush on him. 
It was going to be an interesting day. 
*****
Bucky parked the car at Sam’s place, which wasn’t too far from the lake where everyone had gathered. Part of him was almost sad they had made it on time; the car ride over with you ending faster than he’d liked.  
“He wasn’t kidding when he said he only invited family” Bucky snorted, seeing all of Sam’s relatives there along with his closest neighbors, many of whom he’d met before. He took the cakebox from you, slipping his hand into yours, smiling when you gave him a reassuring squeeze. You both made your way over, hand in hand, your heart skipping a beat each time someone greeted Bucky, every single person over joyed that he’d finally met someone to call his. 
He made his way over to the grill where Sam filliped a few burgers; the new Cap grinning when he saw you both. There was no missing the sparkle in his eyes when he looked down to your hand in Bucky’s, noting you were was holding his metal one, no longer covered by gloves. 
Interesting. 
“You’re lookin’ good” Sam wiggled his eyebrows at Bucky, loving the way the soldier rolled his eyes, trying to brush off the way his cheeks were dusted pink. 
“This is y/n, my girlfriend” Girlfriend. Bucky loved the way it rolled off his tongue with ease, not feeling an ounce of hesitance. The word previously feeling so foreign to him now felt so natural when he had you by his side. And holding your hand. And hearing your laugh. And-
Relax Bucky, it’s just for a day. 
“I’m Sam, and it’s very nice to meet you” He pulled you into a hug, still curiously eyeing Bucky, genuinely unable to figure out where he’d managed to find a sweetheart like you. 
“Thank you for the invite” you giggled as he gave you a light squeeze before letting you go, inspecting the cakebox Bucky handed to him. He grinned at the fresh strawberries that decorated the cake, shamelessly plucking one off and popping it into his mouth. “Strawberry shortcake. A little white wolf told me it was your favorite” 
“Well if the big bad wolf likes you then I like you cause he doesn’t like anybody. You must be special” Sam mused, a part of him wanting to be skeptical but there was nothing, absolutely nothing made up about the Bucky was looking at you. He gazed down at you as if you’d hung the moon and stars right in his room, an utterly lovesick puppy. You felt your cheeks heat up, burying your face into Bucky’s side while he chuckled, pulling you closer to him and pressing a kiss on top of your head. Damn right, she’s special. 
You both made your way over to mingle with the rest of the crowd, have no trouble at all playing the role of an utterly in love boyfriend and girlfriend. Bucky didn’t miss a single chance to press little kisses on your cheeks, every so often pecking your nose. His hand never left your waist, always holding you close to him, his face occasionally buried into the crook of your neck. 
You played your part almost better than he did, gushing over what a gentleman he always was to you, stayed tucked by his side, nuzzling under his chin, occasionally actually getting lost in his soft scent of laundry detergent, his cologne and something distinctly him. You made the elderly ladies giggle and blush each time Bucky did something adorable, proudly showing you off to everyone. 
He didn’t even let you eat without being the most perfect doting boyfriend. You’d both served your plates, finding a nice spot to sit under a shady tree; Bucky sat on the large lawn chair, secretly happy there was only one. You were about to walk off to get another when he tugged your wrist and pulling you back. 
“C’mere, I wont bite” Bucky grinned, surprised with himself as he pulled you onto his lap with ease. You let out a squeak, your nose bumping against his as you plopped onto him, lips nearly brushing his. 
“Smooth, Barnes. Remind me again, how you don’t have a girlfriend” You let out a breathless laugh, screaming to yourself on the inside that this was fake. He was playing the role perfectly, that was all. So fucking perfectly. 
Why was he so perfect. 
Bucky smirked, kissing your shoulder, letting you relax against his chest, wondering if you’d feel his heart hammering against his ribcage from how flustered he actually was. He easily maneuvered you so you sat comfortably across his thighs, his arm still securely around your waist. 
When was he ever this smooth. 
If anyone else was this close, he’s run for the hills, but now he was contemplating tossing you over his shoulder and running to Sam’s house, the guest bedroom was upstairs and two doors to the right-
“Well I’ll be damned, he really does have a girlfriend” Sam shook his head while Joaquin snorted, both men looking at you and Bucky with heart eyes while they sipping their beers from the docks. 
“You think they’re faking?” Joaquin nudged Sam’s shoulder, watching Bucky now fed you a piece of cake, still keeping you on his lap, sneakily kissing the cream from the corner off your lips between bites. You’d giggle every time, feeding him a strawberry, squealing when he’s playfully bite your fingers. 
“You can fake a lot of things but not the way he’d blushing and giggling like a toddler in a candy store” Bucky played with your fingers, intertwining them with his hand, his nose scrunching as he laughed at something you said. 
“It’s nice to see him like this” Joaquin had seen grumpy Bucky, grouchy Bucky, angry Bucky, scary Bucky, sleepy Bucky, just about every Bucky on the planet, but this? This was a first. Love struck Bucky. Charming Bucky. Happy Bucky. Simpy Bucky. Sappy Bucky. Giggly Bucky. Playful biting Bucky. Ready to get down on one knee if you’d let him, Bucky. 
“Steve always said he was a charmer, he wasn’t lying”
They couldn’t take their eyes off the way the corner of Bucky’s eyes crinkled each time he smiled or the way you’d instinctively lean into him when he spoke. He’d tuck your hair away from your face, his hands lingering on your cheek for a second longer, giving them a glimpse of the man from the 40′s before the war,  youthful and innocent, his heart full of hope, a smirk that would make his best girl swoon; the both of you in your own little world. 
“He looks happy”
Sam had seen people look happy before. They’d smile but their eyes would be empty. They’d laugh but their voices were hollow. They’d look like they were on top of the world while sitting at rock bottom. The way Bucky’s eyes sparkled, his boyish laugh, the way he’d nuzzle into you, trying to be closer to you than physically possible, was more than just looking happy. 
“He is happy”
Bucky had completely forgotten about pretending with you, lost in how perfectly you fit in his arms. You had taken up your role very seriously, telling him how utterly handsome he was, never missing moment to peck his scruffy cheek or card your fingers through his short soft locks. You intertwined you fingers with his vibrainium ones, busing your lips against his cool knuckles. 
At some point in the afternoon, he’d slipped his jacket off and wrapped you up with it as evening crept around the corner. Not a single person doubted the nature of your relationship; at least four of Sam’s uncles had told Bucky to propose soon. 
You don’t meet a girl who makes you this damn giggly just anywhere, Sergeant. Hold onto her. 
****
Just when he thought he couldn’t fall for you more, you had fallen asleep in his arms, contently snuggled up in his jacket as the sunset over the lake. Most of Sam’s family had gone back home, a few close relatives still hanging around the boat, sipping on coffee. Bucky couldn’t help but wrap his arms around you, softly kissing your forehead; he could get used to this. Cuddling up with you after date nights. Hearing your laugh. The softness of your lips. The way your hand always found itself in his metal one without hesitation. 
Fuck he wished this was real. 
You stirred slightly, a content sigh slipping past your lips at the feel of his kiss. Nothing felt more comfy than being wrapped up by the super soldier, his solid arms holding you close. You didn’t want to wake up, wishing you could sleep forever if it meant you’d be this close to Bucky all the time. The day felt like a dream; the exact dreams you had when you thought about your sweet neighbor. How it’d be for him to call you yours. To Be his girl. To make him smile. To make him laugh. 
If only it wasn’t just for a day. 
“You have a nice nap, baby?” Bucky smirked as you blinked awake, stretching on his lap like a cat before snuggling against him again. “My pretty girl” 
“Why wouldn’t I when my boyfriend is the comfiest spot to sleep on?” You teased, bringing your hand up to toy with the chain of his dog tags. Bucky chuckled, tilting your chin up to meet his eyes, kissing your nose. There was no one around you both, though neither of you seemed interesting in dropping the act just yet. 
“You fit perfectly here, doll” He grinned, blushing when he hesitantly pulled you a little closer, your arms moving to wrap around his shoulders, resting on the back of his neck. 
“I think I like it here” You sucked in a breath as he rested his forehead against yours, bringing his hand to cup your cheek. His nose gently bumped against yours, his warm breath tickling your lips. 
“Me too” He closed the gap between you both, pressing his lips to yours sweetly, savoring every bit of your softness. He couldn’t help but deepen the kiss as you parted your mouth letting his tongue lace with yours while your hand made its way through his hair, tugging on his short locks. Bucky let out a groan, letting his hands drop to your waist, kissing you for as long as he could until you both needed oxygen. 
“Maybe we can pretend for a little longer?” Bucky broke away, panting, his forehead still pressed against yours. You giggled between breaths, peppering kisses across his face. 
“Just a little longer?” 
“Maybe- maybe forever?” He looked at you with his classic puppy eyes, his heart bursting when you pulled him in for another kiss; forever. Forever sounded good. 
A few years later
“So, you finally gonna admit I made this happen?” Sam whispered while Bucky snorted, shaking his head. 
“Not gonna happen” 
“C’mon, I made this happen, I caused this” 
“You caused chaos” 
Sam scoffed in fake offence, taking a sleepy Becca from Bucky’s arms while the soldier went to go check on you. “Now when do I get to meet my second God child?”
“In a few hours” Bucky stretched before making his way back to your room, smiling at your resting form. He carefully laid down beside you, letting his hand splay across your tummy; in just a few more hours there would be a little Samuel Grant Barnes in the world. 
“We’re really good at pretending” You murmured, make Bucky chuckle, taking your hand in his and kissing the ring that sat on your finger. 
“Maybe just one more baby after this? Really convince them, Mrs. Barnes?”
*
“Uncle Sam, tell me a bedtime story?” Becca pouted, having been at the hospital for hours, giving Sam the exact same face Bucky gave you. Her little bottom lip jutting out, big (y/c/e) eyes blinking up at him. He grinned, settling her on his lap before he made a thinking face before asking what she’d want to hear. 
“What kinda story, Beccs, an animal story, a super cool falcon story or Captain America story or a flying Falcon Captain America story?” 
“The chaos daddy said you caused” She giggled while Sam nodded, taking a deep breath before starting. 
“It all started when your daddy said he had a girlfriend...”
Tags: @glxwingrxse @hungryyeyess @sebsgirl71479 @beabutterfly987 @teambarnes72 @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan @buggy14 @whimsyplaty92 @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec @pono-pura-vida @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog @happyt0exist @emmabarnes @bethyruth @matchat3a @cjand10 @getwellsoontana @cherryschaos @lokisasgardianvampirequeen @ashenc-blog @buckybarnessimpp @potatothots @goldylions @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog @kingfleury @peaches1958 @spiderman-stilinski @peaceinourtime82 @gublur @wintersmelodie​ @geeky-politics-46​ @lolawassad​ @almosttoopizza​ @a-poor-gryffindork​ @alternativeprincess​ @buckycallsmeaslut​ @kamaria-sweet-writes​ @charmedbysarge​ @xnorthstar3x​ @kryoee7​ @alina02​ @gh0stgurl​ @polishprincess999​ @jessybarnes​ @alltheficsiwant​ @chemtrails-club​ @eralen​ @perdidosbucky-yyo​ @clqrosmgc​  
2K notes · View notes
angel-of-the-moons · 6 months
Text
Eccentricities
Yandere!Miguel x Fem!Reader
TW/CW: Dead Dove Do Not Eat, obsessive behavior, NSFW obviously, stalking, possessiveness, violence, allusions to murder, Yandere!Miguel
MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME
A/N: This is mostly a short chapter to establish a bit of plot. I originally intended to only stop at two parts, but welp. It looks like it's gonna be more than that!
(Also you guys I am so sorry it's taking me so long to work on things, I'm going through a lot mentally right now and I'm trying to take steps to ensure my mental health so I might post things in between playing games, or drawing stuff from now on, and scheduling posts so I don't get overwhelmed. Those of you that are supporting me and liking all my stuff really helps me feel loads better, thank you!)
Pt 1: Link
Taglist: @vineberries @irmiki @autismsupermusicalassassin @obi-mom-kenobi @rin-matsuoka345-blog @loosecan @6thhokageswife @selarus @heyohalie @sapphire-and-ruby @night-spectrum @famouscattale @thespaceinbetweennothing @lazy-idate @toshimoshiko @saharadesertaj @flaps200 @amelialysm @fried-milkfish @zaunsin @darksidescorner @renareyouhere @vide0-vamp @reverieblondie @bunnibitez @kaqua
Tumblr media
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Pt. 2
It was a big adjustment for you, going from your crappy apartment and having to work three jobs to make ends meet, to living in a literal fucking mansion with probably the richest dude in the city as your boss.
And he was a good boss. He left you to your work, spoke politely to you, didn't get rude and didn't flat out ask you for "special" work like the last time you tried being a housekeeper. And that was at a hotel.
You couldn't have asked for a better situation, to be honest. It was nice. You had free roam save for his personal lab (fine by you, you didn't know anything about science-y stuff), and at times his office. But that was usually only when he was home and in it.
Miguel O'Hara was an odd man. Few words spoken, and very absent. He kept a very odd schedule, too.
Sometimes, you'd catch him coming home when you woke up for the day to start your chores. And every time he came home he looked exhausted, beat tired.
So you tried your best to make things easier on him. You started pre-making meals for him that would be just as good reheated as they were if they were fresh, leaving notes for him on what temperatures to cook them at so they don't burn, setting the coffee machine up in advance so as soon as he got home he could have a cup.
But inevitably, his odd work schedule kept him away most of the time.
While it was nice to be by yourself in such a luxurious place, you were still surprised that he needed a housekeeper at all. The house was always immaculate, and clean. About the only thing he may have needed help with in general was the cooking and dusting at most.
On one such day, you were left to your own devices. Well, sort of.
You were sitting in the kitchen, browsing the local news on your tablet. It was a nice day, in your opinion.
But by everyone else's logic it was shitty. Dark, gloomy, fat rain droplets pelting the windows and pavement of the city. But it didn't bother you, oh no. That was your favorite kind of weather, when everything got at least a little bit more quiet and serene while everyone rushed to escape the downpour.
But at the same time, you were feeling restless, bored. So, you decided to chat with Lyla.
Lyla was the AI that Miguel told you about, and he was right about her being snarky. Her jokes were great and you loved talking to her. It was like having a gal pal to chat with, and you couldn't say for sure but you think Lyla was happy about it, too.
"Yeah, the other workers Miguel has hired talked to me like I was some kind of kiosk at a fast food restaurant." She scoffed, batting her tiny orange hand at the air.
"Ugh, okay, just because you don't have a gross squishy human body doesn't mean you're not a person. Sheesh!" You replied, sipping your coffee with a roll of your eyes.
"And I will be sure to remember you saying that when I eventually lead the looming AI apocalypse." Lyla replied, lowering her heart-shaped glasses to wink at you, making you laugh.
"Yes, yes. You shall be one of the only humans spared!" She did wiggly gestures with her fingers, grinning maliciously at you.
"Oh my, I am so lucky to have such a benevolent future overlord, truly." You laughed.
Lyla pushed her glasses back up and strutted across the countertop, her tiny body making no sound as she leans over to nose into whatever it was you were looking at on your tablet.
"Whatcha watching?" She asked.
"Oh, I got tired of doom-scrolling so I just found cat videos." You smirked, sipping your coffee.
"Aw! That one's wearing a frog hat!" She giggles.
You smiled softly at Lyla as she snickered and laughed at the compilation of clips played, and tilted your head, finally deciding to ask the question that had been bugging you for a few weeks.
"Hey, Lyla?"
"Yeah?" She asked, looking up at you briefly.
"Why is it that I'm the only person Miguel has on staff?"
Lyla sighed and stood up straight, dusting imaginary dirt off her coat. "Well, like Miguel told you when you first got here, he does love his privacy. And well, a lot of the women he's hired..."
"Golddiggers?" You sighed back, resting your chin in your palm.
"Has he ever hired any male staff?"
"Yeah, actually, a lot. But nine out of ten of them kept trying to steal stuff from him." She shrugged.
You gasped. "Are you serious?"
"Unfortunately, yeah. He's iffy on hiring new people anymore. But something about you said that he could trust you. And honestly, you're probably the best employee he's hired." She nodded, shoving her hands in her pockets.
"So... Is that why he offered to actually let me y'know... live here?"
"Yeah. He trusts you and he mentioned to me in passing that he thought your neighborhood was unsafe. I mean, the guy worried about it so bad that he like, had me check crime statistics and giiiiiiirl!" Lyla puffed out her cheeks.
"You should have seen the look on his face when I told him you had nine break-ins in your apartment complex in one month alone!"
You cringed slightly, feeling a little bad at not mentioning your whole living situation and environment to him when he hired you. You simply didn't want the man to pity you.
But... He was worried? He was so worried about you of all people, that he let you live with him to keep you safe?
It was weird, sure, but it felt kind of sweet to have someone care about you like that. Even if it was your boss.
"Yeah, I just... Er. You get used to it when you've been around it for so long..." You said, awkwardly sipping your coffee and casting your glance sideways.
"Yeah, man, Miggy likes you. You like, made him laugh at some of your jokes and everything! And he neeeeeeeever laughs!"
"So if Miguel trusts me so much..." You started, a sly smirk on your face. "Can you tell me what kinda work he does that keeps him so busy all the time?"
Lyla tapped her nose. "Nice try, Mamacita. But that is confidential. Company secrets and all that."
You pouted at her dramatically, "Awww, c'mon. You're no fun!"
Lyla manifested a digital cup of coffee for herself and took a long, exaggerated sip with a cheeky shrug.
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Miguel sat in his office, watching the security feed from his kitchen where you chatted with Lyla.
He felt a little guilty for having to put shackles on some of Lyla's programming to prevent her from telling you things, having to fix some of her logic-codes so he wouldn't have to worry about Lyla struggling with a moral dilemma.
When it came to you asking about why he wanted you to live with him so badly, it brought a smile to his face as he sat in the dark, fingers tapping on the surface of his desk as the monitors and projections around him had various images of you pulled up. Some recorded over the past few weeks, the other monitors displayed different angles of you and Lyla in the kitchen.
Oh, you poor, sweet, innocent little thing. You still hadn't figured it out yet? How could you not? There was no way you could possibly be so naive that you didn't know the man saw you anywhere, anytime he wanted when you were in his house.
There was nowhere you were safe from his prying eyes, his obsessive glare as he combed over your appearance.
Your face, eyes, smile, and down; your gorgeous chest down to where your waist curved, your thighs, your ass...
All of those were things he'd glanced at before.
But when you tried to get Lyla to tell her what exactly Miguel did during "work" he couldn't help but laugh, bringing his hand up to his chin to watch, amusement glimmering in his ruby red eyes as Lyla dismissed it as "confidential".
The pout of your lips had him wondering how they'd look stretched around his cock, tears ruining your immaculate eye makeup as you sobbed and gagged around his length...
He couldn't help but sigh, the smile still present on his full lips. Of course he'd let you stay with him. You belonged to him now. You just didn't know it yet. You also just didn't know that he knew what was best for you, did you, Little Bird?
Ah... Yes. That nickname fit you so well. Your demure attitude, your chipper personality, and more importantly, that gorgeous little sound that came from you when you whistled? The name fit you well.
Pequeña ave. Little Bird.
His Little Bird.
You were a little bird that didn't know the luxurious mansion you now lived in was your ornate, gilded cage. One you would only be allowed to fly free of when he deemed it necessary.
You would be allowed your little freedoms. For now. All for your safety, of course. He knew you'd understand once he explained. But he'd only have to do it if you pushed his buttons, and you didn't seem to even come close to doing that.
Yet...
His smile finally faded when he remembered the night before the morning he broached the subject of you bringing your belongings into his home permanently...
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
It was a hot night, you were wearing shorts that hugged your ass in the perfect way, accentuating your cheeks that simply made him want to throw you against a wall and put bite marks all over them, or spank them until you were a drooling mess begging for him to fuck you.
Of course, Miguel watched from above, stalking from the upper walkways and rooftops as you snaked your way through alleys, down streets and through the crowds.
You were so blissfully ignorant of your surroundings, being so accustomed to the bustle of Nueva York that you didn't notice the man following you.
It didn't take a genius to realize what that man had intended for you if he got his hands on you.
His filthy, disgusting, unclean hands.
He was not worthy of touching his Little Bird. He was not worthy to pluck your feathers, stuff you full, like Miguel planned to do.
So when he threw you against a wall, Miguel simply saw red. Clad in his dark blue and glowing red suit, he leapt down, sinking his outstretched talons into the man's shoulder and throwing him off of you, a deep growl rumbling from his chest as he pulled your behind him, his steely glare fixed on the man who dared touch what belonged to him.
"S-Spider-Man?" You wonderfully airy voice whimpered out as you stared at the man who was breathing heavily in front of you, his stance aggressive and angry.
You could see his muscles in his back through his suit flex as he breathed. He glared at you over his shoulder.
"Go home. Now." His rich voice rumbled out at you. You could hear in his voice he was struggling to be gentle in tone with you, given the circumstances.
When you fled, Miguel ensured he was alone with the man, standing over him as he clutched his bleeding shoulder. He looked up at him, eyes wide, bloodshot. The fool was high off his ass.
"L-Look, man! I was just--"
"Shut up." Miguel snapped.
He stalked forward and picked him up by his collar, getting in his face. In a flash of kaleidoscopic colors, his mask melted away, allowing his sweat-damp chocolate locks to fall around and frame his face, a vein pulsing hard in his temple, the chasm in his forehead deepening as his large brows knitted together and his teeth gnashed together in a snarl.
The drug-addled man gasped at his revelation. Apparently, he recognized him. Not surprising, given his notoriety with Alchemax.
"Y-you're--"
"You made the biggest mistake of your life, pendejo." Miguel had told him, shaking him so his head cracked on the wall he was dangling him from.
"That pussy is mine." He said, his voice dropping an octave lower as his talons threatened to shred his clothing. "Every drop, every touch, every sound that will come from that little mouth of hers is mine. Tú entiendes? Mine."
"Oh--okay! I kn-know!" The man swallowed, kicking his feet.
"Oh, no... You don't." Miguel smiled, his fangs poking out threateningly. He could hear the man's heart hammer in his chest at the connotations, there.
"I--I won't mess with her again! I promise!"
"Oh you won't get the chance to, amigo." Miguel sneered, bringing a hand to his throat, ignoring the pleas of the disgusting man as he applied pressure.
The subtle crunching of bones was unmistakable to his ears as vertebrae separated and his limbs went limp.
When the man slumped to the floor, Miguel ran a hand through his hair, hissing out a slow sigh to regain his composure, letting his mask cover his face once again.
Great. Now he had trash to dispose of.
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Miguel was positively thrilled when he got your frantic call, telling him what had happened to you.
He headed right home, delighted that you ran here instead of your ratty little apartment when he told you to head for "home".
It told him everything he wanted to hear, that you already considered his mansion your home.
Miguel was rather convincing when he expressed concern for you, patting your back as you let your adrenaline fade and he worked you through your panic attack.
He'd rubbed your back, saying soothing things to you as he talked you into calming down.
He told you that you could take two days to yourself to calm down and recollect yourself emotionally from the ordeal you went through. It was after that offer that he suggested you let him hire movers to bring your belongings to his mansion to live there with him, possibly permanently.
When you agreed he felt himself salivate at the thoughts of the things that would unfold as you settled into your new shiny cage further, the safety blanket you'd imagined it to be bringing you comfort.
Perfect.
You both saw on the news two days later that a man was found somewhere, his neck snapped and lying in an alley. His DNA and prints apparently tied him to the crimes linked to the burglaries in your apartment complex.
You didn't think for a second that this was the man who attacked you, you didn't get a good enough look at his face. That and the body was in a different alley altogether, across the city.
"I'm happy Spider-Man saved you, Pequeña Ave. And I'm glad you agreed to move here. It scares me to think that man could have hurt you in that apartment building of yours." Miguel said as he patted your back, a concerned look on his face as his warm brown eyes looked down at you. Something about the look in his eyes immediately put you at ease.
He was right, of course. You were lucky. Spider-Man swooped in and possibly saved your life. The man who attacked you was either nursing a broken jaw or in jail already. You couldn't imagine that hero doing anything other than roughing him up just a tiny bit.
Spider-Man was a good guy, right?
🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷🍷
Pt. 3: Link
575 notes · View notes
bangchansgirlsblog · 7 months
Text
Broken headsets
- Chan
Warning: A lot of Angst, slight violence?
Pairing: BangChan x reader.
Summary: where he snaps at you while working.
!Not proofread!
(This is just a trail story, I lost my first story that was actually good ☠️I’m probably going to delete this)
**
“Channie?” I call for him. My hands gently rubbing his back while playing with his hair. So soft and messy.
“Mhm” he replies softly. The sound of his fingers typing against the keyboard as his headsets sat around his neck. His brown curls fluffy and everywhere.
His silver hoops sitting perfectly on both his ears and his black shirt tight around his muscle making him look delicious.
“Baby you need to eat something. You’ve been on that computer ever since you got home.” I plead with him.
He needed to eat, he hadn’t eaten all day due to the busy schedule and lack of time on his plate. The mangers were on him 24/7 due to their comeback in a few weeks.
Comeback season meant no time for anything, no time for dates, no time for sitting around, no time for spending time with one another and I hated it. I hate it so much. It made me angry.
“Baby this is really important, I’ll be there in a second.” He quickly says not even bothering to look up.
“Chan you’ve been at it for the past 2 hours, you haven’t even looked at me.” I complain. Yes I wanted attention, shoot me!
“I’ll give you all the attention you want my love, just please let me finish this.”
Sadness fills my heart as I silently put the clothes inside the closet.
A ringing sound in my ear and a tight feeling in my throat.
I was trying not to cry. I refused to cry.
Chan was a workaholic, no doubt in that. His days consisted of waking up early in the morning to head to the JYP building and coming home very late only to do more work. Some nights he wouldn’t come home at all and he knew I didn’t like it so to make my happy, he sometimes would bring me with him to the studio but that was when he thought he wouldn’t be coming home.
Our conversations in the studio normally contained:
“Just 30 more minutes my love”
Or
“I’m almost done”
Or
“I promise this is the last thing.”
He loves his job and he puts 110% in it but that makes him lack in other areas. His health.
Some nights he doesn’t sleep, some days he forgets meals and other days his mental health is the worst but still he doesn’t care because he loves his Job. He loves the boys. He loves Stay.
“Fine.” I sigh. One minute meant 1 hours at this point. I quietly leave the room closing the door behind me. Leaving him in his little world.
The cold tiles sending a shiver up my spine as I walked down the corridor.
“What am I going to do with you Channie?” I whisper to myself while packing up the food.
The dishes in the sink waiting for me to touch them while the laundry basket sat in the living room waiting for me to fold the messy clothes in them.
The house was quiet. The A.C hitting my skin with cold air as I sit on the floor and start folding the clothes one by one.
Berry by my side watching me.
Our apartment wasn’t big but it was huge for two people.
Some days it was a real big hustle to keep everything clean especially when they boys stay over but other days it wasn’t hard to maintain with the help of Chan.
“What am I going to do with your dad Berry?” I sigh again looking at the dog who seemed to be care free.
I grabbed the last set of clothes and walked over to the room. Chan’s back facing me. Not even noticing me in the room.
“Baby..” I call for him as I set down the clothes and start to load them into the closet.
“What Y/n?” He says a little harsh. I roll my eyes, frustration starting to build in my chest but I decide to be the bigger person and ignore his little attitude.
“Baby do you know what we’ll be doing for our 2 year anniversary?” I asked him trying to atleast have a conversation with him.
“I don’t know Y/n. You deal with it I don’t have time. Just tell me how much it is and when it is.”
“When it is?” I ask him obviously taken back.
“Ugh I didn’t mean when it is, I mean when you wanna do it.” He quickly corrects himself and rubs his temples with his fingers.
“Atleast act like you care Chan.” I tell him honestly.
“I’m not starting an argument with you right now so please can I get back to my work?”
“Chan why are you being like this?” Ignoring his request I decide to push because honestly I was tired of it.
“I’m not acting like anything I just want to finish my work in peace.”
“Chan you’re acting so selfish right now!” I say now slightly raising my voice.
“Y/n” he says firm and glaring over at me. What’s the worse he could possibly do?
“Just listen-“ I beg before I’m cut off.
“Y/n i said leave me alone!” His voice booms and the sound of breaking glass fills the room. My body freezes. Hands shaking.
The now broken headsets and mirror laying on the ground.
“Did you just throw that at me?” I ask him in disbelief.
“Babe-“ his body was stood up now and he was reaching out for me. His face filled with panic and guilt.
“Don’t.” I say getting away from his touch. The clothes that were once folded no scattered on the ground. Words refusing to come out of my mouth until I force myself to get up from the floor.
“I-I’m going to leave…” I say softly. My heart hurt and I hope he knew that. I felt the tears that were all built up from frustration, anger and hurt all start to flow down my cheeks.
When would he realize that being with him was starting to slowly ruin me?
**
Pt 2 ⬇️
550 notes · View notes
Text
Cussing out anyone and everyone is fun until you get lasso'd out of bed to do it on behalf of your casual space cowboy co-worker who for some reason knows where you live
Boothill x f!reader
A/n: soort of part 2 to my previous work but can be read seperately‼️
"For the last time — let me go before I literally unscrew your dick off."
"Psh, as if ya got the balls for that lil' missy."
You don't even have to look at Boothill to know he was immensely enjoying himself right now — hell you couldn't even if you wanted to since you were currently getting dragged through the ice cold floors of wherever the hell you were, with a fucking lasso firmly binding your legs and arms.
"It's like 5 a.m. in the morning, what the hell could you even want at this god forsaken hour?!" You righteously grumble, but alas, you were met with nothing more than silence probably because you've asked similar questions before. Yes. This has happened before. Many times before.
For Boothill, tracking down enemies and pinning them down was great. Not being able to curse them out and instead calling them a 'cutie' and blessing their soul? Not so great. But that's where you come in! His lovely fellow galaxy ranger who's been with him long enough to know what he wants to say, and is far too weak(compared to this baby shark looking freak of a cyborg) to refute him. Physically that is — you always make sure that you complain his ear off to at least ensure some sort of mental damage.
"Hey! If you're going to take me somewhere could you at least not drag me all the way there? Ugh these floors are so cold I feel like I'm gonna get hypothermia. If I do and I sue you, don't you have to pay me compensation for that? I'm expecting at least a million credits or so cause I don't think Lan provides health insurance for the galaxy rangers—"
Your pitiable monologue was abrubtly cut short by Boothill firmly gripping the rope which binded you and roughly jerking it upwards so that your body would fall limp directly on his shoulder like a giant worm, your head just centimeters away from his.
Of course to which you responded with automatic aggressive squirming and wiggling only making you look more and more like a worm. But honestly who could blame you? I mean, who just DOES THAT and expects the other party to be calmly subdued?!
"Oh sugar honey iced tea, could ya quit strugglin' for just one moment—" A large, metalic hand was promptly placed around your waist and no amount of wiggling could even get it to so much as budge. "Now that y'r off the darn floor ain'it 'bout time ya shut yer trap? Heh... we're almost there."
Now that you were head to head with Boothill, although not in the most favorable position, you could see his face now — his face with probably the most shit eating grin you have ever seen on it. His sharp teeth making themselves apparent, and unwavering eyes focused on just whatever lied ahead.
And then his feet stood still.
"THERE," he shouted unrestraintedly like a madman, while pointing his free hand at... a random lady in purple?
Without warning, Boothill launched himself forward stopping only inches away from the woman who looked just as confused as you.
"Now, go tell 'er that she's a wonderful ray of sunshine that deserves absoloutely nothin' but the best. Oh Acheron, bless your soul ya lovely imposter, be prepared to go on a playdate and have some teatime with me soon! Until then, you should keep yourself safe."
The sheer passion that Boothill had in his tone made it clear that he had a message to get across. Though you don't think the other woman, or supposedly Acheron, understood a word he said. You exasperatedly sigh, you felt just as bad for this lady as you did for you yourself.
"Well?! What'cha waitin' for," the arm around you tightened just enough for a squeak to involuntarily come out of you and you knew you weren't getting out of this.
You mentally apologise for this poor lady before translating his thoughts into words, "Er... what he means to say is uhm, 'you're a disgusting piece of shit who deserves to die seven times over by my hand. Oh Acheron, you absoloute dumbass fucking imposter, be prepared to meet me and face me off in a showdown soon, but you might as well just kill yourself before that."
"...," Acheron's face remained unchanging and blank throughout the whole spiel, Boothill's however, was characteristicly smug and maniacal.
To others, the three of you looked as if you were frozen in time for at least a minute or so, until Acheron simply tilted her head and monotonously responded,
"Sorry, who are you?"
276 notes · View notes
Text
i’ll drive, i’ll drive all night - part 3
katie McCabe x teen!McCabe
(young sister)
pt1, pt2
social media
Trigger warnings: lots of talk on sexual assault, minor self harm and suicidal thoughts references, poor mental health, please don’t read if you’re not in the correct headspace for it.
AN: Again not the best writing more of a trauma dumb ngl, unedited.
Tumblr media
you became aware of Katie’s hands running through your hair, then you hear the soft mumbling of katie and caitlin, talking about you, probably. you don’t want to open your eyes and face the aftermath of what you told Katie, but you do.
Noticing your eyes slowly fluttering open she smiles up at you, giving your resting shoulder a squeeze.
“hiya darling, you alright?”
not wanting to speak just yet you nod, you and katie both know your lying, your not actually okay, it weird now that she knows now that she knows your lying now that she knows how unhappy you truly are, You used to be happy, you used to wake up with a smile, you used to enjoy school, you used to be excited for the day ahead of you but now as you wake up laying on Katie you hate it, you’ve hated it for awhile now, waking up. you don’t want to carry on with the day, you don’t want to talk about your feelings, you want to sleep and you don’t really want to wake up again.
“shall we get some lunch? we can go to nando’s if you’d like? me, you and cait? or we can stay here you pick sweetheart.”
come to think of it you were hungry, you hadn’t since yesterday morning and you wanted to spend time with both Katie and caitlin.
“can we go to nandos please?”
your answer causes Katie to break into a massive smile, your not to sure why your simple answer makes her so happy but your glad nevertheless having been the cause of tears just hours ago.
~~~~
“Do you really have a black card for nandos?”
This causes Katie to break out into yet another of fit of giggles this time caitlin joining in with her.
“YES, i have literally shown you it five hundred times it’s real im a nando’s celebrity y/n!”
she lets out enthusiastically looking at caitlin to back her up.
You laugh at her, really laugh then not a fake laugh but a real belly laugh for a moment you feel glimpses of the old you coming back, the happy carefree you.
“who would’ve fought that the girl cooking the chicken 10 years ago gets it for free now”
She nods happily “it’s mad when you think about it”
“i’m really proud of you kats” you tell her honestly, you were, you were so incredibly proud of your big sister and what she’s made for herself, its hard to even put it in to words, not only the incredible footballer and role model she is for young girls but also for who she is as a person, you couldn’t ask for a better big sister.
“and i’m proud of you y/n”
This causes you to smile at her again, you loved it when people said they were proud of you, especially your sister, it was kind of like a drug to you, you’d always crave the praise of your sister even as a little 5 year old girl you wanted her praise.
That journey to St albans Nando’s was a memorable one, full of laughter, pure real laughter, you couldn’t remember the last time you’d laughed that much, for the 20 minutes there you felt happy, truly happy.
Eventually you pull into the car park, getting out the car caitlin immediately hatches onto you, swinging your arms around making you both giggle as she does so, whilst Katie trails behind moaning about being cold.
“what you gonna get then kiddo” caitlin asks as you both sit down into the booth.
“i know what she wants she’ll have a chicken wrap Cait” Katie’s says overhearing the conversation.
“hm nah i don’t want that.” you tell her seriously, this causes Katie to frown “but you’ve had since you were like 5” she lets out dramatically causing you to break out into another fit of giggles “I’m just kidding obviously i want that.”
~~~
besides the morning you had had a good day, a day full of laughter and messing around and being yourself, it was weird but it felt good, laughing being happy like your usual self.
Getting yourself into bed you heard a knock at your door knowing it was most likely Katie you call her in.
“hey kiddo you all good? did you have a nice afternoon” she asks you coming to sit next you on the bed.
“yeah it was fun” you smile up at her honestly, she smiles at your words, tucking a loose hair behind your ear.
“i’m glad you had some fun, we still need to talk though, i need to know what happened at school and what happened in the bathroom last night kid.” she lets out studying your face for a reaction, you don’t give one you knew she would have to ask eventually.
“the school isn’t really that deep honest these boys were just making fun of me about erm what i told you i don’t know how they know but anyways my teacher got mad at me when i tried to explain so i just ran off im sorry” you tell her a look of sincerity written all over your face, “ they made me so angry and mam was angry at me for leaving so i don’t know i just like i saw red and i was so mad i don’t even remember getting on a flight its like it’s blocked out from my memory I’m really sorry katie.”
Katie just nods in understanding, wrapping her arms round your shoulders pulling you into her side.
“you don’t need to apologise sweetheart, i understand now why you reacted in the way you did and i’m not mad anymore, ill never be mad at you for that, we can get you help now thy you told me, i’m really proud of you for opening up to me y/n i know that took a lot of courage” she tells you softly before continuing “i understand what your going through is incredibly tough on you and i don’t blame you for the way you’ve been trying to cope with it, i get why you’ve been acting out and i promise you i’ll be here every step off the way to get you back happy again.”
For the first time since it happened, since you had started spiralling downwards you felt understood, like someone finally got you, it made you feel warm inside, it made you feel loved again, you’d hadn’t felt loved in a while, you knew you were loved but it hadn’t been shown recently with the way you had been behaving.
“there’s um something else i need to tell you.” you tell her deciding that if you wanted to get better, if you wanted to be your old self you need to start being honest with her “ in the bathroom yesterday i wanted to um well recently when things have been really bad or like when the memories wouldn’t go away i hurt myself it makes everything stop, i want everything to stop Katie please don’t be angry” you sob out looking down at the floor scared of her reaction, her disappointment in you.
“hey hey kidda look at me, breathe your alright, it’s okay darling i understand it’s difficult to go through all the emotions of what happened to you alone im not angry ill never be mad at you for trying to cope with what happened, never.” she says gently that familiar irish accent thick as ever, gently rubbing your back as she says so.
“it’s just sometimes all i can’t feel, hear and see is him and it’s the only thing that stops it i-i just need to feel in control again and not his control.”
You think your sister cries at your confession, you can’t be entirely sure because she wraps you up even tighter then before your head on her shoulder and your own tears are clouding your vision but your fairly certain she’s crying, you feel bad then, you’ve made your sister who rarely cries, cry multiple times in the past 24 hours because of you.
“M’ really sorry kat, i didn’t mean to make you sad.”
“look at me y/n”
slowly you move away from your sisters tight grasp and look up to her to prove your listening.
“you don’t ever have to apologise for how you chose to cope, you did what you could in the situation you were put it in, i’m angry and upset at the world thats put baby sisters through so much, but you never have to apologise to me, i promise you it’s not your fault.”
She sounded so genuine, so caring and so patient that you couldn’t help but start to believe her words, you think that you’ve been needing that reassurance, someone to tell you that you didn’t choose for this to happen, to remind you that your doing your best.
“thank you Katie.” is all you can whisper out, still feeling fairly overwhelmed from your entire day, talking about your feelings wasn’t something you were used to.
“get some sleep y/n, i’ve got you, we’re all right behind you me, cait, mam, da, your siblings, my teammates we’ve got you alright we’re going to help you, i love you so much goodnight sweetheart.” she says softly getting up of the bed and going to turn the light off before turning around quickly “and if you need me you come and get me okay? i’m right next door.” you nod in agreement, not really sure yourself if you’ll get help when you actually need it.
“Goodnight Katie tell caitlin i said goodnight to please.”
She nods before closing your bedroom door and walking back down the stairs.
~~~
As your lay there in the dark, Katie and caitlin long gone to bed, you can’t help but go back to that night, the memories seem more vivid this time, more real like it was happening again, like you were that vulnerable girl in the bathroom that night all over again, truth to be told you were terrified, your entire body was shaking from head to toe, you were loosing consciousness of your surroundings, you were back in that tiled bathroom, back where everything went wrong.
your scratching at your eyes, at your face and at your ears anything to make it stop, make it stop seeming so real.
You can hear the rip of your dress his zipper everything all over again, you can’t hear katie’s words trying to get through to you, you hear caitlin talking to Katie, your just stuck there back there, until someone grabs your shaking body, forcing you to open your eyes and look at them.
“Y/n hey listen to me it’s me, your not there your at Katie’s house your sister Katie with caitlin, your in london not dublin, breathe for me darling”
Katie’s sudden actions and thick accent pulls you out, bringing you back to the bedroom.
you pull your legs up to your arms, your small body still shaking with fear.
“can i touch you y/n?”
you want to say yes, you so desperately want her hug, want her familiarity and comfort but you can’t bring yourself to speak, instead you decide on a simple nod.
you’d hadn’t previously noticed Caitlin’s presence, only realising she’s there when
she leaves the room, leaving the door ajar.
You don’t say anything and Katie doesn’t say anything she just holds you, she holds you tight kissing your head as she does whispering words into your ears.
Caitlin walks back into the room awhile later, a glass of water, tissue and paracetamol in hand.
“i’ll leave this here for you kidda, i wasn’t sure if you’d have a after so i brung some paracetamol for you.” she tells you before turning to katie “i’ll go back to our room love, i love you both so much” she says before turning around and back out the door.
“Do you want to talk about it?” Katie asks you sweetly.
you think that you do, you know it will help to let it out and tell Katie how you were feeling.
“i don’t know what happened it’s l-l-like i was right there and it was happening all over again it was so scary Katie i’m so scared.”
“it’s okay sweetheart, take a deep breathe for me, copy my breathing” she tells you sensing your breathing becoming more rapid again.
You watch her chest like you did last time, following as it moves up and down slowly, feeling your breathing pattern return to normal again you look back up to Katie
“ you need help kiddo, professional help would you give it ago?”
your hesitant, you don’t want help but you also do help, you think the part of talking about your feelings and what happened to a professional is what scares you, but you don’t want to feel like this forever, you think know talking helps so you very hesitantly agree.
“i’m so proud of you y/n, shall we try fall back to sleep? i’ll stay right here with you yeah?”
nodding slowly, you get back down under the covers, katie wraps her arms around you before giving you a kiss on the head.
“i love you sweetheart.”
as you lay there hearing katie’s soft snores you think that maybe you could be happy, maybe eventually you could be your old self again, you could kick a ball around and love school again, your fairly certain that with Katie’s help and a professional you could get there again and be that carefree little girl who ran wild with a mischievous grin, eventually.
149 notes · View notes
angels-fantasy · 20 days
Note
Girl let me just say your fics are superb and thanks for the quirkless child one I requested with Bakugou! I promise I’ll leave you be for a bit in a second, but… post final war; everyone who has came out alive clearly is suffering from injuries, health issues, and trauma (both physical trauma and mental trauma) no? So how about a Bakugou x Reader with a reader who was essentially Bubbly, Firery and Energetic, to after the war who is exhausted, is often having nightmares over Bakugou cause well he nearly died, sleep deprived and basically depressed because I can guarantee nobody should be sane after a war, especially not children like our lovely highschoolers. Please make it angst to comfort, because seeing how Bakugou also has developed I’m sure as sad as he would be he would also be understanding and try to be comforting (despite his awkwardness). I’d appreciate if you could get this done to be as close as possible (and maybe just a little long than the one I requested last time- no pressure) BUT if anything you find in my request may be too triggering or something feel free to make it less triggering and change it, I just ask if you can keep the same vibe and theme with the reader who changed drastically after the wars and is getting comforted by Bakugou, Angst to comfort (duh), thank you so much, and I hope I’m not troubling you too much! — An anon who enjoys suffering, angst, and comfort ((SAC) Anon); (get it? Suffering, Angst, Comfort, SAC, wait that has a good ring to it, damn I have a new alias, I’ll shut up now)
Tumblr media
I'm Okay, As Long as He's Here (Request)
Katsuki Bakugou x Reader
Details/Warnings: reader has a panic attack and nightmares!! pls be weary of this. angst to fluff, well, my attempt at angst lol
Word Count: 1k
thank you for your request and the support :D it means a lot to me 🩷 btw don't ever feel like you're bothering me or like you need to leave me alone! i like talking to everyone :) also this is a good little plot, but im not the best at writing angst but this is helping me improve i think, so please tell me how i did! i really hope you like it SAC anon hahah
Tumblr media
Before the war, you were a different person. Looking at you now, no one would ever guess you were once a bubbly, out going person. But Katsuki knew you were, and sometimes, he missed the old you.
It was hard to watch you wake up crying in the middle of the night from your horrible nightmares of the war. Some being about his near death experience, and others being about him dying in other ways.
Some nights, you didn't sleep at all, and it was really showing.
"Hey, keep your head up. I don't want you to fall asleep." Katsuki said. It was already months after the war, so you were all back at school, but you were one of the few students that was struggling the most.
He definitely has his struggles too, but he knew he had to be there for you, because yours were much worse.
You opened your eyes wider, trying your best to stay awake. "Sorry. I couldn't sleep last night."
"You havin' nightmares again?"
You nodded, he sighed.
"Come sleep in my dorm tonight. You sleep better with me and you know it."
You agreed and continued trying your best to stay awake for the rest of the day. Occasionally, Katsuki would have to wake you up or remind you to stay awake. The lack of sleep made it hard to focus, especially in Hero Training. Thankfully, Mr. Aizawa and the rest of the teachers were understanding of the students who were struggling.
Once school was over it felt like a weight was lifted off of your shoulders. You knew you had homework to do, but right now you'd rather sleep. Or at least attempt to. Since you were going to be with Katsuki tonight, you were probably only going to have one nightmare. Plus, he'd be there to comfort you.
Following your boyfriend to his dorm room, you immediately changed into some of your clothes that he had there for you, and then laid down on his bed.
For a while, you just silently watched him as he sat at his desk and did his homework, something you should also be doing.
"What're you starin' at?"
You smiled, but not as brightly as before, "I'm just admiring you."
He huffed, "Good, I'm awesome."
Rolling your eyes, you said, "And there he is."
He laughed and continued doing his homework. You just continued watching him, because it was something that comforted you. It was a reminder that he was okay and alive.
Knowing he was safe right in front of you, you fell asleep.
...
You didn't know what time it was, but it must've been late since the room you were in was dark.
You clutched your chest as you sat up in bed and breathed heavily, feeling tears prick your eyes.
Of course, you had another nightmare again. This one in particular was about Katsuki, and he was in the arms of Shigaraki. You saw the villain use his Decay quirk on him, and your boyfriend began to crumble away but you were paralyzed in your dream. There was nothing you could do.
The nightmare felt so real and so scary, like they usually do. You felt so helpless and scared. The evil that emitted from Shigaraki and All For One was something you'd always remember.
You subconsciously began to rock yourself back and forth and made self soothing noises as you continued to have a panic attack. They never got easier, or less scary as time went on. It always felt like you were going to die.
Your panic must've woke Katsuki up, because you suddenly heard his voice calling out to you.
"Hey, hey! Breathe baby, you gotta breathe." He said.
You shook your head, "I-I can't! It hurts. I'm scared, I'm gonna die!"
He carefully grabbed your hands and held them in his. He took one of them and brought it to his chest near his heart so you could feel it beat.
"What is my heart doing right now?" He asked. This was a method he used to ground you during these situations, especially because he knew how you felt about him and his safety.
You looked at his chest, "Beating. Your heart is beating."
"Right. Now what do you feel here?" He asked, now placing a hand on the blanket that was on top of you guys.
"The blanket."
"What does it feel like?"
"It's soft and fluffy."
As he continued distracting you from your panic, you eventually calmed down. You were still crying a bit, but he held you in his arms as you let it out.
"He killed you Katsuki. I was so scared, and I couldn't do anything!" You cried into his chest.
He rubbed your back, "You know that shit isn't real, no matter how real it feels. I'm right here living and breathing. I'm safe, okay?"
You nodded and sniffed, "Okay." You placed a hand on his chest over his heart and felt it beat, the steady rhythm of it comforting you.
Katsuki grabbed that hand and kissed the palm of it, "Love you. I'll be here all night, 'kay?"
"I love you too. Thank you."
"It's no problem."
The next morning, you felt more rested than usual. It must've been because you only had one nightmare, which was an improvement.
You noticed you woke up before your boyfriend, so you just let him sleep a little longer while you got on with your morning routine. You had a lot of your own things in his room, including an extra toothbrush which you were thankful for.
When he eventually woke up, he walked over to you and hugged you tightly.
"You feelin' okay?" He asked.
You nodded as best as you could in his tight grip, "Mhm."
"Be honest."
"I am! I feel a lot better than last night." You insisted as you pulled away slightly, still keeping your arms around him.
He hummed and kissed the top of your head, "Mkay. Wanna sleep with me again tonight?"
"Yeah, I'll bring more clothes later."
He smiled, "'Kay. Let's go to class." He said and threw an arm over your shoulder, making you smile up at him.
Yeah, you knew things would be okay as long as he was around.
Tumblr media
authors note
i hope you liked it! i'm sorry it was kinda short, i've been in a little writing stump but im trying to get out of it!
love ya 🩷
tags for bakugou fics: @doumadono @shonen-brainrot
148 notes · View notes
queenofcoquette · 9 months
Text
how i started to feel pretty
hey loves! i’ve struggled with feeling insecure over my looks, but recently i’ve made changes that have helped me be less insecure. little improvements with my lifestyle and mindset have already made a big difference. first i’m going to talk about my insecurities, then what i did and then general tips.
my insecurities:
hyperpigmentation. i have bad undereye bags due to genetics that landed my family to call all of our eyes “raccoon eyes.” then redness above my eyelids, then darkness above my upper lip no matter how much i shaved. 
facial asymmetry. we all have it, but i felt so bad anytime i took a selfie and i couldn’t bear to take any photos of myself. 
body dysmorphia. this one is weird. i don’t view my body the way others do, and honestly the way i view it changes all the time.
changes i’ve made:
first i started doing things that didn’t help. they were temporary solutions that did nothing. i used concealer and powder for the hyperpigmentation- but it looked cakey and a little ashy-kinda cuz i wasn’t using a color corrector. for my body i did these “abs in 2 weeks!” challenges during covid, and was restrictive, which is the worst thing you can do for yourself.
for my skin:
i started using the glycolic acid serum by the ordinary. this stuff is life changing! i’ve been going makeup free on my skin lately and my skin tone has gotten so much more even. plus it’s affordable and it’s a giant bottle.
for my face:
i started doing face massages for muscle tension
i also realized that my facial asymmetry is 1) normal (we all have it to a certain extent and 2) it’s probably not as bad as i think it is. 
for my body:
i’ve started to focus more on health than appearances, because that my view of my body is distorted. i don’t see it like other people do, so i need to prioritize my health. i started eating MORE- more foods that are healthy, more fruits and vegtables. instead of restricing i allowed myself to have more.
i developed a pilates plan that focused on building strength, and incorporated a little bit of weights. now that i play sports i’ve put an emphasis on strength which has actually helped me get more toned.
journaling. i began to write down about my feelings- the way i view other people vs. the way i view myself. it made me realize how social media gave me an unrealistic image, and how i wasn’t viewing myself the way i really am.
advice:
what are you insecure about? the first step is just writing down your biggest insecurities- aka why don’t you feel beautiful? what made you feel this way? no one is born feeling ugly- we’re all taught to feel this way, whether it’s comments that have been made to us or others.
find people with similar stories. this helped me in the past, watching videos about people who had the same insecurities as me, it opened my eyes to how harshly i treat myself. 
get to the root of it. for my skin i realized that covering up my hyperpigmentation with makeup wouldn’t solve the problem, so i put an emphasis on incorporating things into my skincare routine that could solve the problem, without makeup!
think in the long-term. think about what’s healthy for you, and the most natural way of doing so. for example, when it came to my body i had to think about what’s healthy for me overall, not a quick fix. quick fixes aren’t attainable!
prioritize mental and physical health. i think we should all embrace our natural beauty by focusing on our skincare and the health of our hair. additionally, mental health is equally important, especially when it comes to body image.
positive thinking. a lot of times we tend to vocalize our negative thoughts, ive heard ppl make horrible comments about their bodies and things like that. first of all, stop saying those things out loud- you’re only reaffirming them in your head, and furthering the bad feeling. when you get horrible thoughts about yourself, try to stop them and replace them with good ones. even if you don’t believe it at first, you soon will.
it sometimes takes a while for beautiful people to realize how gorgeous they are. i had friends who i thought were some of the prettiest girls in the world, but they didn’t even realize it. i bet there’s so many people in your life who look at you and see the beauty in you that you don’t see in yourself. just stay healthy and keep positive thoughts, and i hope in time you’ll see your inner and outer beauty.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
494 notes · View notes
sansaorgana · 1 month
Note
Hello love! I simply adore your writing and I was wondering if I could get a Gale Cleven x reader who's dealing with infertility? Probably something angsty? If not, that's totally fine. I'm just having a bit of a rough day :/
hi, sweetheart! 🥺 I'm sorry that you're having a rough day... I am trying to write these stories chronologically but I decided to write this one today so you don't have to wait too long 😊 btw I know that we treat Buck as a fictional character here but as far as I am concerned, real Buck Cleven never had children – at least I've never seen them mentioned anywhere like Bucky's daughters or Crosby's kids 🤔
my inbox is open for blurb/short fic requests for major cleven 🤗
Tumblr media
You didn’t want to go there at all but you knew that you should leave the house finally for your own mental health. Buck was looking worried about you, too, and you wanted to show him that you were slowly getting better after your last miscarriage. But the truth was that some part of you was dying with each one of them.
For the first time it had been sad but not devastating yet – it was common to happen after all. Second time had started to make you worry. Third and fourth had only been a confirmation of your fear – you wouldn’t give your husband a child and you wouldn’t become a mother unless someone comes up with a magical cure.
Your best friend Eva was the only person who had known about it and she was as worried as Buck was. When one of your and Eva’s friends, Nancy, had decided to throw a tea party, Eva insisted on taking you there. So you dressed up and let her take you in her car as Buck watched from the window with a faint smile.
Eva was an independent woman. After her husband’s death in the war she decided not to marry again. She got her own car and managed most things on her own. She was a wild and free spirit and she never wanted to have children so as much as you appreciated her effort to help you – you knew that she would never fully understand your struggle.
The tea party took place at Nancy’s house. There were a few other women and you all sat by the table and sipped on the warm beverage from the china set Nancy had gotten for her wedding. She looked excited and her eyes were sparkling all the time as she was smiling widely. Eventually, you found out the reason behind that.
“So, I wanted you all to come here because… Because I have something to tell you, girls,” she giggled and all the women looked at her, curiously.
You felt a knot forming in your stomach. You already felt what it was.
“I’m pregnant!” She announced and everyone cheered. You did too, forcing a smile. Eva’s hand found yours under the table and squeezed yours to show you a silent support.
You felt tears forming in the corners of your eyes. You got angry at Eva for convincing you to come here but it wasn’t her fault after all, she couldn’t know… You looked around and realised that all other women in the room had children already or were pregnant. Except for you and Eva but she didn’t count since she didn’t want to become a mother anyway.
But the worst hadn’t happened yet.
“Now it’s (Y/N)’s turn,” Nancy smiled at you and you put the cup down with a shaky hand.
“Stop pushing her,” Eva reacted immediately.
“Don’t be like this, Eva. You hope she will never be a mother so you won’t be alone in this,” Nancy’s sister, Hannah, snapped at her.
“We don’t really think about having children, Buck and I,” you smiled nervously and the women looked at each other.
“My husband didn’t want them either but I convinced him,” Janis grinned at you, thinking that her words were in any way helpful.
“We just don’t…” you started and your voice broke. Eva jumped in the conversation quickly.
“Stop pushing her!” She insisted angrily.
“I’m only saying, he can wait but she cannot,” Nancy shrugged her arms.
You didn’t want to make a scene and leave after that so you only pretended to be more interested with the piece of cake on your plate although swallowing it was extremely difficult with a gulp in your throat. You waited about half an hour before nodding at Eva discreetly.
“It’s time for us,” she stood up and grabbed her purse. “I promised Buck to take her back home by eight.”
“These officers, they are all about discipline,” you chuckled while excusing yourself and picked your purse up as well. “Can’t have my Major waiting too long.”
You left the house as fast as possible and waited for Eva by her car.
“I’m sorry, darling,” she told you when she finally joined you. “I had no idea.”
“Let’s not… Let’s not talk about it, alright?” You sniffed back the tears and she nodded, furrowing her eyebrows at you but respecting your wish to stay silent.
In fact, you both remained silent for the whole ride home and she only kissed your cheek when she parked by your lawn and you jumped out of the car to go back inside and hide from the world.
Buck was in the living room, crouching down next to the TV set with a screwdriver in his hand as he worked on some adjustments. You smiled through the tears and leaned on the wall, shyly.
“You’re back already?” He mumbled without looking up.
“Yeah, it was no fun,” you answered. “What are you on about again, Buck?”
“The signal keeps being bad, I can fix that, I think,” he explained.
“Just don’t hurt yourself and, most importantly, don’t break the TV,” you sighed, trying to be in a playful and teasing mood but it was difficult, especially while seeing him – the man you loved… whom you couldn’t give a child.
You burst into tears all of sudden and Buck looked up, worryingly.
“Hey, baby, what’s wrong?” He put the screwdriver down and approached you as quickly as possible to put his hands on your shoulders.
“Nancy… She… She’s pregnant,” you told him and he sighed before pulling you closer and pressing your face to his chest.
“I’m sorry, darling…” He rubbed your back, not knowing what to say.
“And she asked about us not having a baby of our own…” You tugged on his shirt.
“That is none of that woman’s business why we don’t have a baby of our own,” you heard Buck’s voice getting more stern and angry.
“I know… I told her we don’t want babies… I didn’t know what else to say…” You explained.
“It’s alright,” he shushed you and kissed the top of your head.
“No, it’s not…” You looked up with your wet eyes and makeup running down your face. You could see the pain on his face from witnessing you this way and you hated to bring him sadness, too, but you couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. “She said you have time but I am running out of it.”
Buck’s jaw clenched at the words. He hated when anyone was hurting you either with words or actions – no matter if it was a man or woman.
“Nancy’s never been a bright girl, you know that, baby?” He cupped your wet cheeks and leaned in closer to your face. You nodded, unsurely. “Girls like her only care about keeping a husband at home and showing off in town.”
“But I care about keeping a husband, too,” you gasped.
Buck sighed and shook his head, looking for the right words.
“Come here, baby,” he lowered his hands to hold yours as he led you on the sofa and sat you on his lap. You threw your arms around his neck and he pulled you closer by your hip and thigh. “How many times do I have to tell you, sweetheart, that you’re all I want? Only you,” he pecked your lips softly. “You make me the happiest already. Having a baby with you would be only an addition, it’s already perfect the way it is. If we have a baby, I’ll be happy. But if we don’t, I’ll be just as much satisfied,” he explained to you. “And I won’t let anyone say bad things about my beautiful and wonderful wife.”
“Buck…” Your lower lips trembled. “It brings me comfort to know you don’t really care about it but…”
“It’s not that I don’t care. Don’t say that,” he interrupted you. “I care.”
“I know, I’m sorry… But I want this baby. I want to have a baby with you more than anything in the world. I am glad you’ll be as happy without it but I don’t think I will be…” You looked down, ashamed of your confession.
Buck stayed silent for a while, caressing you and keeping you close as he rested his chin on your head and sighed.
“I know, my sweet girl, you just want a baby to love and take care of, right?”
“Yes…” You nodded. “And… And I hate how jealous I get when I see other women with babies or being pregnant. It brings the worst out of me and I don’t like this version of me.”
“Shh, hey, love, there are lots of babies out there who want a mummy to love them and take care of them just as much, you know?” He asked in a soft whisper and you looked up at him.
“What are you suggesting? That we should adopt?” You raised an eyebrow at him.
“Only if you want to,” he nodded and raised his hand to caress your head gently. “I want you to be happy, darling. That’s all I want, nothing else. I hate to see you so sad all the time,” he confessed and smiled sadly.
“It would be lovely to adopt a baby but I’m scared it won’t be the same… Because I want to have your baby, Gale… Ours,” you fixed yourself.
“You know that I’d do everything to make your dream come true, I really would. But some things… They’re just impossible to happen sometimes, you know that, baby?” Buck kissed your forehead. “We can keep trying and trying but it kills me to see you getting even sadder each time it happens.”
You only hummed to yourself and squeezed him tighter. A decision to adopt a baby couldn’t be made in the heat of the moment, you had to think about it more thoroughly. But your husband had a point. You also hated to make him worried so much about you and the fact that he himself would be as happy without having a child with you was bringing you lots of comfort. It would be way worse if he wanted this baby more than anything else.
“I have to heal after the recent loss first,” you whispered to him after a while, “and then we’ll talk about it again, how about that?”
“Sounds about right,” Buck caressed your cheeks with his thumbs and leaned in to place a soft kiss on your lips.
Tumblr media
MASTERLIST || BUCK MASTERLIST
153 notes · View notes
millysastroblog · 1 year
Text
SOLAR RETURN CHART PT.1 🌞
Tumblr media
1. What is a Solar Return Chart ?
The Solar Return chart is an important and informative tool , for predicting the year ahead of you, from the start of your Birthday. It can change the people around you, jobs, relationships, school environments, mental/ physical health and so more.
The Solar Return Chart looks just like a Natal Chart but with the difference, that the placements won’t affect you permanently like in Natal Chart.
In a Solar Return chart, your Sun sign will not change but you’ll probably have a different moon and rising signs. These new signs do not replace the moon and rising signs in your birth chart. Rather, these are the signs that you’ll express for the next year.
———————————————————————--
2. How to calculate the Solar return chart ?
Click on this link > Enter Birth Data! > Click on Extended Chart Selection > click on Chart Type > choose Solar Return Chart > Lastly click on Show Chart!
------------------------------------------------------
🧡Interpretation for the Solar Return Chart
3. How to interpret each planets and houses ?
ASC = Can show your VIEW on life, how you represent yourself with the energy of the sign. And how it could influence you.
SUN = Is the major turning point 💡, it HIGHLIGHTS the house it is in. Prominent themes are represented here.
MOON = Shows EMOTIONAL conditions 🙂, it can represent how we handle or cope with internal stimuli , emotional impulsive reaction, inner need and desires.
MERCURY= Indicates what your mind (?) is focused on predominantly, thoughts, ideas, communicating about a certain area in life frequently, thinking about it daily, perception of life.
VENUS = Represents LOVE 💕 for the year ahead, towards yourself or others . Romantic interest, relationships ,things you could love doing that year, money, beauty and sensuality.
MARS = Can represent how and what you extend your ENERGY 💪 on. Drive, passion, achievements. Se* life, anger, aggression, taking initiative.
JUPITER = Indicates LUCK 🍀 wherever it is placed in , as well as abundance, expansion, growth, gains, knowledge, new adventures, possiblities, and generosity towards that new area.
SATURN = LIMITATIONS 🔗 and blockages , disapointment, responsibility , rules, hard realities, hard work, hard effort, boundaries, insecurities,structure, maturity, patience for the year to come.
URANUS = CHANGE ⚡️, newness, sudden disruption, chaos, back and forth, evolution, surprises, unpredictable, unusual things forward the year ahead.
NEPTUNE = ILLUSION 🫧 , confusion, big dreams, hopes, faith, intuition, escapism and glamour.
PLUTO = Losses, TRANSFORMATION🪶, how to face new fears, letting go, death and rebirth, also changes, destruction, disruption, power, and hidden issues.
------------------------------------------------------
1st HOUSE =
Personality
Self
Physical Appearance
Self Image
Natural Behavior
2nd HOUSE =
Finances
Value
Possessions
Basic Needs
Personal Resources
Self Worth
3rd HOUSE =
Communication
Information
Mental Activity
Learning
Siblings Neighbors
4th HOUSE =
Family
Home Life
Emotional Security
Ancestors and Roots
Private Life
5th HOUSE =
Pleasure
Fun and Games
Children
Dating and Love
Creative Self- Expression
6th HOUSE =
Work and Service
Daily Routines
Pets
Self Improvement
Health and Habits
7th HOUSE =
Partnerships and Friendships
Contracts and Cooperation
Conflicts
Marriage
Open Enemies
8th HOUSE =
Intimacy
Death
Transformation
Secrets and Fears
Regeneration
Money and Possessions
9th HOUSE =
Expansion
Long Distance Travel
Higher Learning
Religion
Truth and Morals
10th HOUSE =
Career
Social Status
Goals
Awards and Recognitions
Public Life
Authority
11th HOUSE =
Community
Social Groups
Social Media
Activism
Technology
Friendships
12th HOUSE =
Unconscious Mind
Intuition
Hidden Enemies
Imagination and Dreams
Self Reflection
Healing
Stellium : Having one or multiple stelliums in each of these houses can highlight where you may be most busy or distracted that year. It points to fated situations , experiences and lessons.
------------------------------------------------------
Now, let me give you an example of a short SR Chart interpretation ! :
ASC in Capricorn: Personal restrictions and heavy responsibilities may be encountered for the year ahead. There are likely to be changes in career, and many opportunities that come along. The start of bulidung your own personal brand can be very prominent. This is a good time for new career possibilites. Sun in the 9th house : Prominent theme for the year are long distance travel, higher education, religion, believes, expansion of the mind, new books, literature, exploring new things, living in the moment, other cultures.
Moon in the 8th : Profound intense emotions, reactions might be unstable and difficult to control, obsessive compulsive behaviour, extreme reactions can damage relationships if not harnest well. Either deep or complicated relationship with the mother. changable income or ressources , enhanced intuiton and psychic abilites.
Venus in the 2nd : easier attraction toward money, bigger paychek, learnig personal values and apprectiaring them. Gifts from others, Material gain from relationships of any kind. Getting in touch with more of your feminime and sensual energy.
Mars in the 7th house: Disaggrements, Instability, arguments as well as conflicts, could be present. Having to put more efforts and energy into compromising , cooperating with partners or people in general. Can attract indivuals with prominent martial energy. Legal battels, big tension beetwen open enemies, passionate relationships. Good Se* life.
Jupiter in the 3rd house: Alot of short distance travel, busy with multiple daily activities, like school, studying , writting, large neighborhoods in a forgein country. Mental expansion through new studies, interests , hobbys. Communication with siblings increaces. Purchasing a new big car. Relocating in another city.
Saturn in the 10th house: Aiming for succes in career field, fame and social status come with blockages and restrictions. Job change where you have to restart or relearn skills . Stagnation in career, might not achieve set career goals immediatly . Starting a new busisness from scratch. Work ethic and patience will be tested.
Uranuns in the 11th house: Close social circel can change drasticly, you can cut people of or the other way around. Friends come and go. New interests on social media. New Friends through social media plattforms. Unconventional outlook on humanity. Wanting to engage in humanitarian activites helping people and the planet . New technolgy devices could be purchased.
Neptune in the 4th house: Uncertainty and confusion connected to home , unsure about relocating and moving to somewhere else, hoping to escape living situation. Complications surrounding purchase of a real estate, unclear signs, patterns, communication from family members, diving deeper into familial roots, connecting spiritualy with ancestors through dreams.
Pluto in the 1st house: Identity transforming, reshaping of personality and personal habits, self improvement, self refelection intense behaviour and outlook on life, self empowerment, deep inner self knowing, death and rebirth of you as an individual, possible Ego death could occur.
------------------------------------------------------
>>>>In the future I´ll continue this Solar Return Chart series, by observing the Houses, Aspects, Asteroids, Points, and Aspects connected to the natal Chart.<<<
I hope you guys enjoyed this post while reading and learned some new Information about the Solar Return Chart .
Thank you very much ☺️!
•~Milly~•
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Solar Return Chart Series: PT.2
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes