queenofcoquette
self improvement princess
💌amy-15💌
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while i don't believe that everything happens for a reason, i do believe that in everything that happens you can learn something and grow, and in that you find reason. whether you learn to overcome a struggle, learn to avoid a mistake, you are still learning and that's important.
even in times of failure, or times when you're wronged, you can still take something away from the situation and use it to better yourself. in my life i can think of things that were embarassing or sad, but i know that in the end i am who i am today becuz everything in my past has shaped me.
#queenofcoquette#self improvement#that girl#that girl 2024#pink pilates princess#it girl#healthy habits#self care
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your value isn't determined by what other people think about you. yoru character isn't going to be judged in the court of public opinion. regardless of how you carry yourself there will always be people who don't like you- this can be due to jealousy, projection, bias, etc. so stop wasting your time trying to please everyone.
the truth is the most important thing is your internal character- your integrity, how you treat others, etc. be authentic to what you enjoy, what you think about things. when you are kind don't do it for the sake of being liked, but for the sake of being good just to be good.
focus on being your best you mentally and physically. find good friends and stick close with them. find a greater purpose in life. in the only one whose judgement matters is that of God.
#queenofcoquette#self improvement#pink pilates princess#that girl 2024#it girl#healthy habits#self care
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positive thinking & self concept
introduction:
hey loves! i made a post a while back where i mentioned positive affirmations and someone told me that they didn't believe in them. obviously it's fine to have differences in opinion, but positive affirmations are literally just positive thoughts- and there's science to back up the importance of them (i'll put my sources if u want to read more <3)
why?
your thoughts create your self concept- or your view of yourself. if these thoughts are primarily negative then you're going to just slip farther and farther into unhealthy habits and feeling bad. that's why it's so important to reflect on your thoughts and to work on having healthy thought patterns.
how?
have an emotional outlet for your toxic thoughts. the next step is taking these toxic thoughts and writing them down as a way to vent. anytime i feel upset i like to write down everything i'm feeling/thinking as a way of release.
work on replacing harmful thoughts with ones that're more constructive. a rule of thumb i have is that when i do something stupid or make a mistake, instead of going thru a path of "i suck and i hate myself" i just think how i can do better. so instead of beating urself up, look for better ways to view a situation. at first you might not believe it, but if you continously do it then it'll start to come naturally.
being kind to others. the way we perceive other people does come back to us- when you're critical of EVERYTHING that everyone does, then you're going to turn that judgemental eye on yourself. so be patient with people
giving gratitude before bed. because i'm converting to catholicism i pray the rosary and spend time reflecting on everything God has given me. you don't have to be religious to do this- you can just journal or think to yourself about all the things you have, even really little things like cups of hot chocolate and crunchy leaves in the fall. it always puts me in a better mood :)
#that girl#queenofcoquette#self improvement#pink pilates princess#it girl#healthy habits#self care#that girl 2024
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how do i become more girly? as someone who dresses baggy and has mostly dark manly clothes lol
the first thing is coming up with your actual style. if you don't already have an idea in mind think about the things you like- music, art, movies, etc. this will kinda of put yourself in the right direction. also note if there's anyone who's style you really like- like a fictional character or celeb.
make a moodboard. i always keep a moodboard on pinterest becuz its fun and also it just helps me narrow down specific pieces i want in my closet. you can also learn a lot more about your style.
start off by buying versatile pieces. what i mean is that instead of buying a dress first, maybe buy a cute top and skirt for the same price that you can mix and match. like when you're getting new clothes start off by buying things you can wear with many outfits and then once you have enough of those you can start getting statement pieces.
see if you can work your current pieces in with new clothes. like don't get rid of ALL your new clothes. like if you have a dark top you can wear it with shorts or a skirt, or if you have pants then you can wear a cute blouse w it.
if you already have an idea of what you like style wise then the 2nd tip is definitely the biggest one. when it comes to finding clothes with your style you can always look online, on sites like depop or really even amazon if you'd like.
hope this helps :)
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Hi. Im relatively new to tumblr and the coquette style. Ive been a non-social nerd most of my life lol. Now im 15 (almost 16) and regret not learning more hobbies when i was younger. So can yoy please suggest fun low effoet hobbies amd also more ways to be coquette. I love your blog btw. 🎀
tysm! honestly i didn't have hobbies for the longest time either. when i was 12 i started swimming, 14 when is started softball and 15 when i started water polo. i started sewing at 15 (and now i do it everyday)
anyways, here some ideas i have :) :
baking! baking is so fun and rlly easy tbh as long as u have a good recipe.
cooking
sketching
gardening. tbh i suck at gardening but its fun to have like a flower outside to take care of
yoga
reading
writing
as far as being more coquette, the thing about coquette is just embracing and romanticizing ur girlhood. like just having fun and being lighthearted, and everyone has a different version of it. i know girls here who love 2010s music and victoria's secret and that's their version. for other girls they love old hollywood and 60s music. really it's different for everyone. like when i think about my own style it's a lot of 70s style clothes and brandy melville stuff, and i love things like classic rock and lana and sofia coppola movies and taking polaroids. really it's just about finding what you like and having fun doing it.
hope this helps! :)
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Just wondering why you started this blog or what the inspiration behind it is/was?
tysm for the question!
honestly not much thought really went into it. i just thought tumblr was fun and i like giving advice so i made some basic posts. then like last year my account started growing weirdly fast so then i started working on making better posts and stuff. :)
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hiiii! i just wanted to say i think ur blog is super sweet and its so kind and positive that u post these kind of things to help other people its just super lovely <33
aww tysm!!! :)
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hot girl walks
introduction:
hey loves! since last summer i've been going on walks for about 40 minutes. the days that i have practice or a water polo game i dont, but every other day i do. i've found that it's a really easy way to get exercise, fresh air, sunlight, and also it's just really peaceful.
benefits:
improved mobility
strengthens bones
improves endurance
eases joint pain
boots immune function
lowers blood pressure
improves circulation
strengthens muscles
can improve sleep
https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/5-surprising-benefits-of-walking
https://www.arthritis.org/health-wellness/healthy-living/physical-activity/walking/12-benefits-of-walking
safety tips:
plan your route. always plan where you're going to walk and whether or not it's a safe place to do so.
carry your phone. obviously have your phone in case of any emergenices, or just if you get lost or something.
only wear one airpod. it's so dangerous to have both airpods/earbuds in at the same time if they're noise cancelling. you want to be able to hear your surroundings while also listening to your music.
be aware of your surroundings. always pay attention to cars and people around you- whats behind you, whats in front of you.
preparing:
pick a playlist
wear comfortable shoes. walking long distances with shoes that weren't made for that can cause a lot of pain. you don't need super fancy walking shoes but just sneakers with good support.
hydrate before/bring a water bottle if it's a long walk. hydrate before you walk and hydrate afterwards, especially if it's hot out.
sunscreen. remember to wear your sunscreen and protect from UV rays :)
#that girl#that girl 2024#queenofcoquette#self improvement#pink pilates princess#coquette#it girl#healthy habits#self care
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You're so cute wtf /pos
oh tysm! :)
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Girls in Boston, (1972) ph. Nick Dewolf
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de-stressing
introduction:
the first step to handling how you feel is finding the root of it. these can be things that're in your control- things you can change to solve the problem, or things that're outside of your control and that you can't affect. the first step is making a list of what's in your control and outside of it so that you can approach your feelings.
in your control:
accept how you feel. acknowledge that you feel stressed, and instead of trying to force happiness on yourself, try to think about how you can deal with your stress in a productive way. (getting to the root of the problem).
make a to-do list. make a to-do list of everything you need to get done, and a list of everything stressing you out. once you know what to do you need to then think about how you're going to do it.
break it up into daily steps. the next step is making little changes in your daily routine to get things done. when i was stressed about my permit test i just scheduled it a few weeks an advance and spent 20 minutes every night studying for it.
clean your room. another good thing to do is just cleaning up your environment. it really does make a difference for how you feel, and also i find it feels really good once your room is cleaned up.
developing new habits. i've started sewing a little bit each day as well as studying everyday. these habits make me feel good- i don't get as stressed about school or stressed about not sewing.
outside of your control:
vent journal. when there's nothing you can do about a situation just write down all your negative thoughts.
support. after you've written down all your negative feelings and understand how you feel, talk to someone that you trust. make sure that it's the right time though, like ask them if it's a good time to vent.
find people who feel the same way. this is sort of the same as the point above, but for example, i was really upset just thinking about the world and how so much suffering is always going on- and i found article after article with tips on how to be happy even when things in the world are bad. sometimes it feels good just to know that there's so many people in the world who feel the way you do.
conclusion:
stress is a normal part of everyone's life, it's an emotion we all feel time to time, and something we all go through. the key is knowing how to deal with it, and how to feel better despite the things that're stressing you. if you feel like your stress/anxiety is something that you can' manage on your own then i hope you can get the help that you need :)
#that girl#that girl 2023#self improvement#pink pilates princess#cinnamon girl#queenofcoquette#self growth#self love#healthy habits
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tysm for the tag @klerhisboring !!!!
Get-into-it Questions
If you were at a concert would you be
a) the singer (main character, everyone’s watching)
b) the dancer (you're on the stage too and you add to the singer but the spotlight is not on you)
c) backstage crew (you work bts and you keep everything going. no one knows you’re there)
d) security (you keep everything in check)
or e) audience (you cheer on the singer and support them)
probably c) or e)- i have horrible stage fright which takes out the first two options and i can't imagine myself being a security person
biggest pet peeve?
people who are very loud and wrong, people who don't tuck in chairs and people who litter
biggest insecurity about yourself?
physically: my lips are pretty small and also i wish my nose was more upturned, it's straight but when i smile it goes down a little
mentally: i lowkey have some emotional problems and im kinda an insecure person
what’s your favourite quality about yourself?
i'm a pretty determined person and i work hard. when i was new to swim my coach told my dad that i was really coachable and that i improved really quickly.
any pets? (current or previous)
i've never had pets ever :(
favourite season?
when i'm in new england it's winter but here in florida ig summer
job you want to have?
in my biggest dreams i'd be an actress, but more realistically i'll either be an editor or a psychiatrist
favourite thing you own?
all my stuffed animals and dolls tbh (for sentimental reasons)
if you could buy one thing in this entire world (price or size doesn’t matter) what would you buy?
i'd love an old 70s car but with a new engine so it's more efficient (i don't have my license yet but thats ok)
tagging: @adorablemaneater @being-addie @paulmccartneysflower @acinnamongirlsdiary @prettieinpink @mother-marilynn
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anyone know how to make scene packs from movies/tv shows? ik u can get them from instagram accounts and stuff but i want to make my own scene packs
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tysm for the tag @klerh111 !!!
favorite genre of music: mellow gold, classic rock, acid rock
♡ favorite herb: not sure- maybe rosemary
♡ favorite crystal: rose quartz
♡ favorite historical figure: marilyn monroe and princess diana (yes ik im basic)
♡ favorite composer: mozart or chopin
♡ favorite monument: hmm idk maybe the lincoln monument or smth cuz as a kid i went to DC and ran up the stairs and looked down from the top and was amazed- so that sticks out to me
♡ favorite mythology: honestly i know nothing about mythology but greek mythology seems really interesting
♡ favorite type of museum: not really a type but i love The Smithsonian Museum of American History
tagging: @dark-nymph3t @lovesickbrat @being-addie @paulmccartneysflower
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overcoming self doubt
introduction:
self doubt is something we all deal with. it's normal to have it, but when it gets to be a debilitating thing in your life, it's something that you need to work on. self efficacy is the opposite of self doubt- the belief that you CAN accomplish something. the term comes from albert bandura, a psychologist, and he stated that without self efficacy then you can't achieve what you set out to do.
bandura had a lot of beliefs that he believed could improve a person's self efficacy- a lot of it comes from observing other people's success and having positive role models. so i've combined some of those tips with things that've helped my friends and i :)
overcoming:
change your mindset about failures. failure is unavoidable, so it's important to learn to grow from it instead of breaking down. look at what you can do better next time- mistakes and failures aren't a bad thing if you learn from them.
positive affirmations. positive self talk is proven psychologically to make you feel better about yourself. visualizing yourself doing good is also something that helps. just improving your view of yourself and working on fixing your negative thoughts.
learn from others. when you want to improve at something it's great to observe others who are succesful. for example, when i first started swimming competitively i would watch people swim during meets and observe their technique.
pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. truly the only way to overcome your fears is by facing them slowly. i used to be terrified of water, especially deep water- couldnt swim or tread. now i play varsity water polo and have no problem in 13+ ft of water. the only thing that got me over it was being uncomfortable sometimes. ofc know your limits, but slowly work up to overcoming fears.
building self efficacy:
set goals you can measure and goals that're attainable. it's good to dream big but when it comes to goals set things that you won't have to overwork yourself to achieve. things that
break your tasks up into smaller tasks. biting off more than you can chew can just lead to burnout after a while.
being proud of your achievements. always be proud of your improvement, even if it seems small compared to others. remember- other people's journeys aren't pertinent to YOU. you need to measure your own success, not comparing yourself to what/how others are doing.
having good role models. having role models who've worked to achieve what we want can actually improve how well we think we can do at something. if you see someone did something you want to do, then it makes you realize that it IS possible.
conclusion:
it can take a long time to overcome self doubt and begin to feel confident in yourself. what's helped me a lot is just learning from other people and then being grateful when i make progress. i hope these tips help :)
#that girl 2024#self improvement#self confidence#glow up#that girl#queenofcoquette#pink pilates princess#it girl#healthy habits#self care
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