✧ Joy ✧ She/Her ✧ Vampire Romancer Extraordinaire ✧ Co-host of The AyeSphere interactive podcast ✧ See pinned post for FAQ ✧Joy is a Scottish, international best-selling author, editor, and disability advocate currently manifesting in the American Midwest with her cryptid husband and their small dog, Holly Mop. When not dicking around online, Joy can be found hiding behind a keyboard writing paranormal-pun-filled romances about vampires, werewolves and all other manner of creatures that go bump in the night. In the event of a Tumblr purge, rattle some acorns in a skull and she'll get back to you.Alternatively, check out www.joydemorra.com for more information.
Listen, I know Dream winning his duel with Lucifer with hope is like... A BIG DEAL and super symbolic and beautiful, HOWEVER I have something that may not be better, but would definitely be FUNNIER.
Dream loses. He's been locked in a bubble and had his hopes dashed again and again, even though he's still fighting and still hopeful, it's harder for him to reach that and it doesn't come to mind in time for him to win against Lucifer. He's to stay as a servant in Hell and there's no Endless or divine being that can or will come to his aid. He's trapped. Again.
Only Matthew isn't Jessamy, Matthew knows when the best way to help is a tactical retreat to gather reinforcements. So that's what he does, going immediately to Luciene like, "Hey, so, uh..." And there has to be some way they can help him! Luciene makes it clear that none of the dreaming denizens can. None of the Endless can, no deity would be of any help there against Lucifer. There are Old Laws dictating that Dream lost fair and square and no one can interfere with that. And Matthew's like, "Well what about someone who can challenge Lucifer to win him back? Someone not bound by the Old Laws?"
"The only beings not bound by the Old Laws are humans. There's no human--"
Except there is. There's one. One human that Dream would go off once a century to meet, and it's a long shot, but--
That's how Hob Gadling finds himself being approached by a talking raven asking him to trek into hell to rescue his boss. "You know, Dream of the Endless? Lord Morpheus?"
Hob doesn't know who the hell the bird is talking about until Matthew describes him. "Oh, my Stranger!"
"...He seriously didn't even tell you his name?"
Now, the idea of setting foot into Hell itself to do battle with Lucifer Morningstar is, y'know... Not something he wants to do. He confirms over and over if Matthew is SURE he doesn't have to die to achieve this, because he's not ready to leave yet, and Matthew is like, "Yeah, buddy, shouldn't be a problem." He's lying. He has no idea if it's a problem. (It's not.)
Hob is like, "Yeah, but... I can't FIGHT Satan himself and expect to win, I AM still human."
And Matthew's like, "You don't actually have to fight her, it's like a game! But uh... Pretty sure you still feel all the pain and stuff." And he explains the rules, and like, okay, feeling the painful death of whatever kills whatever you decide to be in your round SUCKS, but Hob's been through that before. It's actually a pretty intriguing game, one he thinks he might win.
See, the way he sees it, it's a combination of the "times infinity" type of game (I love you, I love you more, I love you times two, I love you times a thousand, I love you times a million-- so on and so on) with that counting game where you either say one or two numbers, back and forth with someone, and whoever says 21 loses. Basically, there's one logical conclusion the game is going to reach. Someone is going to bust out the "times infinity" or in this case, "heat death of the universe" or some other completely life-ending thing. And like with the counting game, if you can get your opponent to say specific numbers on the way to 21, you can make sure they're forced to say it.
There's a strategy if you think ahead enough, and he has an entire walk through Hell to plan it.
(It SUCKS. He sees Robyn there. It breaks his heart. It's meant to, it's meant to keep him from reaching the palace, seeing his son in Hell, but they don't know Hob. They don't know the grief he's had to overcome in order for him to say, with absolute certainty, that he still wants to live even though it hurts. He reaches that citadel.)
Dream is, of course, horrified to see Hob there. Hob meanwhile is like a jilted exe all, "Yeah, yeah, we're not friends, you stood me up, but I'm still here for you because I'm the bigger person and I fucking care."
He challenges Lucifer for Dream's helm and their safe passage out of Hell. Lucifer is... Intrigued. She just beat Dream of the Endless, and this human thinks he can beat her when humanity's collective unconsciousness couldn't? His immortality has made him cocky, clearly. So she accepts, and bargains that if Hob loses, he has to give up his immortality.
There's a good minute where Hob pauses at that and has to really think about whether his arrogant, condescending not-friend is really worth that but yeah, yeah he is. Meanwhile Dream is off to the side. "Don't do this, Hob Gadling. It is not your responsibility to fix my missteps." Basically his version of pleading for Hob to leave and not risk this up until Lucifer is like enough out of you and shuts him up.
They play. Lucifer starts out with the wolf again, because it's a good starting point to see what direction her opponent plans to take, to get a glimpse into Hob's mindset entering this game. Her plan is, of course, to cause pain enough that Hob will have a hard time thinking, but Hob makes that really fucking hard from the get-go and throws everyone in the room for a loop when his answer is...
"I am the over hunting of the local deer population. Ecosystem destabilizing, predator killing."
Well. Okay. Yeah, sure. Fucking fine. It's hard to kill that painfully. Lucifer manages to come up with, "I am hunting restrictions, nature preserving, ecosystem balancing."
Hob, by that point, is like, I got this, actually. This might be fun. "I am the expansion of civilization. Forest destroying, hunting law nullifying."
Matthew, who had been feeling pretty iffy about calling this guy in to help, is no longer questioning that choice. Dream is a little starry-eyed.
Eventually Hob is the head of the Home Owner's Association. Lucifer is a bear, scrap hunting, person killing. Hob is family, revenge-seeking, bear euthanizing. Lucifer is Pride, argument starter, family destroying. Hob is friendship, blood covenant, thicker than womb water. Lucifer is jealousy, friendship rending, relationship ruining. Hob is personal growth, jealousy ending, apology giving. Lucifer is relapse, progress destroying, confidence killing. Hob is perseverance, step taking, progress rebuilding. On and on until finally Lucifer decides to end this the way she did with Dream and Hob leads her along until it reaches that natural conclusion, the death of all.
Now there's some temptation there to go with the obvious, since he can't die even if the universe was destroyed. At least he doesn't think so. But he had already decided that it was an obvious choice to go for and he could think of a few clever ways Lucifer might get around that. So instead, Hob goes the far better choice and personal insult of being God, universe creator, life giver. He's very proud of himself when the demons erupt into boos and Lucifer looks about ready to rip his fucking throat out with her teeth.
The way he sees it, there are two choices for her there, unless she really pulls something unexpected out of her ass. Option one is the whole "what's a god to an atheist" thing in which Hob would have then been a miracle, faith affirming, god-proving. Not much can destroy a miracle.
But Lucifer, livid and prideful, goes with option two. "I am Lucifer Morningstar, God defying, His Kingdom ripped sunder!"
And Hob has the absolute glee to grin and go, "I am Hob Gadling, clever, death defying, and triumphant over Lucifer Morningstar."
He and Dream are promptly kicked out of Hell on their asses, Dream's helm is thrown at his head with a force strong enough to break the sound barrier, and the gates are slammed shut behind them. The whole thing is so humiliating that Lucifer has to change their gender and moves to LA to open a nightclub.
She was arrested on trumped-up drug smuggling charges, which an officer later admitted was their only way of booking her because god damn Nixon wanted her arrested for her anti-Vietnam War activism. The FBI and the CIA, and the NSA had been surveilling her for months without her knowledge.
If there is any celebrity whose activism is not empty lip service, it's Jane fucking Fonda.
jane fonda got arrested the third week in a row at climate change protests. this time with ted danson
This may be a weird question, idk who else to ask. I found out I have EDS a couple years ago. I'm trying to find surgeons for a couple different procedures and so far nobody has even heard of EDS, much less knowing how to suture my skin so I can heal properly. Google is unhelpful, my insurance is unhelpful. People keep telling me "oh but that's SO RARE, how do you even know you have it?" (Check out this giant bruise and my jaw that can pop out of place.) Every search comes back "surgery to cure EDS?" And I know that's not how it works; EDS is about collagen in connective tissue, surgery won't do shit for that. How do I find a doctor that knows EDS? What specialty do I search for? Sorry to put this in your ask box. I'm just so tired of trying to manage this on my own with no help
Hey friend, I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. I’m on mobile with sketchy signal, so I can’t link to it right now, but the Ehlers Danlos Society (problematic individuals on the board aside) has a global physicians directory for patients to try and find an EDS knowledgeable doctor.
Otherwise I’d try looking for EDS groups on Facebook and Reddit where us fellow zebras often swap physician recs because, yeah, there are so few EDS knowledgeable doctors l, especially depending on where you are in the world.
Best of luck and I hope this posts and maybe some others will have some helpful advice 🦓💖
Hola! I'm Allan and I need help defending myself in court! If you know me at all you may already be familiar with parts of this story;
At the start of the pandemic, my landlord glitched out and lied to the police to have me forcibly and illegally removed from my home (N.B. that I was the only tenant in the house and this was during the first covid-related lockdown/eviction moratorium)
Homeless in a pandemic and in a city embroiled in BLM protests, I was forced to spend thousands, obliterating my savings to find safe places to stay until I could sign a new lease. Sometimes I slept in my office. It was like camping, only with the threat of unemployment instead of bears.
Though it all my landlord was horrendously antagonistic, threatening me, my property, refusing to allow me to retrieve my stuff, and screaming at the police when I acquiesced to her demands for them to be present.
I was able to hire a lawyer and successfully obtained a protective order and an injunction to stop her from acting on her threats to destroy everything I owned, and forcing her to allow me access to move my things. (Some of which she maliciously damaged beyond repair)
I wish that were the end of it, but it turns out she is also attempting to defame me by levying false criminal charges against me.
Unfortunately, I have been unemployed for a while now and while I can't afford a lawyer, the court appointed attorney says there is essentially no case and no evidence against me, but I still have to appear in person or face arrest for failure to appear.
Tickets from FL to Boston are not cheap, as they have to be refundable due to the inconsistency and unpredictability of court dockets. I've already been rescheduled twice and I'm hoping the third time is the charm to finally end this mess.
This wasn't easy to write. I've asked for a lot of help and almost always got it, and I feel the worse for it every time.
I need to buy a refundable round trip plane ticket and secure lodging for 2-3 days in November and prices will only be going up.
Thank you for reading this. I know that the world is unrelenting in its misery, but your help makes it a little more bearable.
(if gfm doesn't work for you, my other payment methods are here:
Hey Tumblr, I doubt anyone who follows me is a stranger to my old ADHD reward system post. But just in case you're new here or, if like me, you can never bloody find the thing thanks to Tumblrs tagging system, I've started to archive some of my older ADHD resource posts on Patreon.
I don't like the idea of pay walling disability resources, so my latest Sticker Method post is free to access and includes a downloadable and editable Excel sheet which can be used in Excel, Google Sheets and in Numbers on iOS to create your own star chart reward system.
Unfortunately, the formulas don't carry over into Google or Numbers, but the sheet is still structured for you and fully customizable to get you started.
Again, the post is free to access for everyone, so if there's anyone else you think might benefit from the sticker method, please feel free to share it with them!
[Video ID: The video shows a white page journal covered in silver holographic stars. A white hand flips through the pages, showing the progress between documented days. Some days have more stars than others, while a notable few are left blank with the word "migraine" visible in black ink. /End ID.]
Hi, a while back you reblogged a post that was giving bad medical advice on how to do a home abortion with herbal teas and I can't for the life of me remember what it was. The herbs I came across that it might be are 1) Tansy 2) Pennyroyal and 3) Yarrow. (I'm writing something where someone attempts to cause an abortion, but ends up near death). I just want to do more research into it and figure out dosages I guess. I hate sounding like I'm plotting a murder, I pinky promise that I am not.
Ahaha. No worries.
I think this is the post you mean:
God. The idea that I ever had the core strength to do things like Mayurasana or Sirsa Padasana pose is wild. It's just so far removed from my current daily existence where I struggle to pull myself upright in bed and just recently strained my Achilles tendon by stepping funny.