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luciferlightbringer · 3 months

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Love in a Hopeless Place

Chapter 10

Chapter 9|Chapter 10|Chapter 11|Updated through Chapter 12

Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader Word Count: 3.6k CW: Slowburn, Angst, Prostitution, Hurt/comfort, trauma, fluff, depression, anxiety, insecurity,

Over the next couple of days, Charlie and the hotel crew started to prepare for their little "intervention" dinner with her dad. Charlie and Vaggie worked together to make up dinner while the others made sure the place was kept up, mostly Niffty.

Later that night, Charlie heard a knock on the front door. Was that him? Why didn't he just teleport in like usual? Charlie went to open the door and saw Lucifer giving his big focused smile.

"Charlie! It's so good to see you," he said enveloping his daughter in a big hug. It had been weeks since he had hugged anyone, the sting of how much he missed it had started to grow back.

"Hi Dad," Charlie said hugging her father back tightly and swinging him around. "I've missed you so much, it's been weird not having you around as much."

Lucifer tightened his grip on Charlie as they hugged, "I'm- sorry about that sweetie, I just... got busy. I'll try to be better about that, I promise."

Charlie loosened the hug enough to study her dad's face, it was tired and worn out, he looked like he hadn't slept in days. Lucifer tried hard to keep his facade up, but he knew his daughter was trying to read him.

"Dad... are you sure you are ok?" Charlie asked with concern.

"Yes. Why do you ask?" he said still trying to hold a smile, holding a silence but futile prayer that he could find a way to fool her into thinking he was ok.

The other members of the hotel, Angel, Husk, Niffty, Cherri, Vaggie, even Alastor started to walk in from the shadows of the hotel lobby.

"Cuz, with all due respect your highness," Husk chimed in "One, you are a bad liar, two, we actually do care about you," Husk looked over to Alastor out of the side on his eye, "well... most of us care about you, and three... we are also worried about (y/n)."

"Ya!" Angel added in, "You two were a couple of peas in a pod, she was even talkin' 'bout wantin' to move in here, den 'poof', ya both are nowhere ta be seen fa' weeks. What gives?! I thought we mattered to you guys!"

"Ya! I miss you and our girl, where is she?!" Cherri pipped in, "We loved watching you two hangin' out here togetha."

"She was a bad girl! But she was really nice! I liked when she would listen to me talk about my bugs fights!" Niffty added, holding up her knife.

Alastor sighed, "Honestly, I'm mostly here for the entertainment of your sorrow... but (y/n) was important to the growth of the hotel and it's community. Plus, she amuses me. I had grown unfortunately fond of her charms," Alastor said with a wicked smile, his comment made the room pause a moment, Lucifer glared at him.

"We miss both of you, sir, it's just not the same here without you. We just kinda feel like we've been left in the dark," Vaggie added, rubbing her arm.

Lucifer sighed, he didn't realize just how much you had meant to not just Charlie, but to the entire hotel. That you guys together had been. It was important for them to know the truth.

"Ok, ok... I'll tell you the truth... but it isn't going to be pretty," Lucifer said with shame painting his face. Lucifer went to go sit on the couch and the others came to sit around him and listen to the story. Lucifer gave an abbreviated story of the last several months of his time with you, truth that you were actually a prostitute he had hired, the story with how it all started with the conversation with Ozzie, the first appointment and the chaos and joy that cam from it, how you had helped him to connect with Charlie and the hotel again, how you supported either other through the stresses of the war with Heaven, how he protected you, how he realized he had fallen in love with you, and then the last night you were together, the blur and confusion of it all, and how finally you had banned him from being able to be scheduled with you again and how you had been told that the whole dynamic was just her acting like she cared about him. He didn't blame or try to paint you in a bad light, he was just defeated and sad.

During the story, the group went through a series of emotions, all of them now understanding why you had not able to talk about your relationship with him at all.

"Damn it! No wonder I liked her so much! She's in da same industry as me!" shouted Angel when the story was over, "She felt so kindred and I couldn't fuckin' see it. Oh, she is good."

"So... none of your relationship was real?" Charlie asked, sadly.

Lucifer shook his head, "No... no I don't think it was."

Husk shook his head, "You're wrong." Everyone looked at him. "Something here doesn't add up, Angel, Cherri, you remember our conversation with (y/n) the night before the war with heaven?" They nodded, Husk looked at Lucifer, "The only lie I have ever seen (y/n) tell you was that she was sad that night because of the war, which... she still was... but the reason she was sad before you came over to check on her was because she was sad that she could not be honest with us about your guy's relationship. We had asked her about what was up because you guys seemed more than friends, and she told us she could not talk about it. And she has tried to bluff some things about how she presents herself before when we first met her, probably all just to protect the secret you guys had. Trust me when I say, she was never fake with how much I saw she cared about you."

Lucifer shrugged, "It doesn't seem to matter though it though... in the end, she banned me."

"Why?" asked Angel, "Did she tell you? Did you ever hurt her?"

"No. Someone else at the place she works called me and told me, she was gone or... something. I don't know if I hurt her, never physically, but I was so drunk at the end of our last night together... I don't know what I did or why I got banned... and I'd never want to cross a boundary like that... she's had too many fucked up people in her life... I don't want to add to that club any more than I already had," he buried his face in his hands, "it sounds like keeping the secret was already a lot of weight on her, I didn't realize..."

"King, listen, I've been in the sex business for a long time, nothin' about this situation makes sense ta me, both from a sex worka' standpoint or from what I know about her. Did you pay her well?" Angel ask inquisitively.

Lucifer nodded, "Ya, I gave her big tips too, I wanted to to be happy and get what she needed."

"No good sex worka' in their right mind would full on ban you for one weird night, even if you did rough 'em up a bit. You told us there was some other client that had been roughin' her up a bit that you took care of. Tell me, did she ban him on the first night of havin' any issues with him?" Angel asked. Lucifer shook his head, starting to think about Angel's words.

"Right. So unless she was stupid, which I know she aint, she wouldn't've cut off probably the best paycheck in hell just because you had one sloppy drunk night where something may have gone weird. Also, on top a dat, sex worka's can be good actors and can pretend like they care. But they try not to get attached, and like Husker said earlier, she got attached, and boy it was obvious. That's probably a big reason why I didn't sus her out sooner. By da time we met her, nothin' about ya relationship was actin' anymore, on either side. Cuz you love 'er, dontcha?" Angel pointed while he leaned back on the couch.

Everyone looked at Lucifer, he nodded, "I do, I love her."

Angel nodded, "And you would do anythin' to make 'er happy, including keepin' yourself away from her if you thought it would make her happier, isn't dat right?"

Lucifer started to tear up, "Yes..." Charlie started to tear up and hugged her dad.

"Therefore... there is something fishy happenin' here, there must be some form of miscommunication, or... a third party that likes messin' with shit," Angel looked up at the ceiling thinking.

"How do you know all this?" asked Vaggie suspiciously. Angel looked over at Vaggie and have her a sly smile, "When you're life was spent in da Mafia and your afterlife was spent around shitty desperate sex worka's that are dying to get a taste of your success by any means necessary, you pick up on a few things, baby."

Charlie perked up, "You think someone at her work did this?"

Angel shrugged, "It's very possible, not 100%, but it's possible. Lucifer, did (y/n) ever talk about having any issues with other girls at her workplace?"

Lucifer thought a moment, "Hmm... she mentioned there being some annoying girls that she some sometimes needed to put in their place, but nothing this crazy hostile. But then again, she didn't like talking about the Lounge much, and I didn't like asking because I started to get more sad whenever I was reminded that I was just a client to her."

"The Lounge, like the Luxurious Lady's Lounge in the Entertainment district?" asked Angel.

"Ya... you know it?" asked Lucifer.

Angel smiled, "Know it? Ha! Sure do. I know exactly where it is too. May have even seen 'er once or twice without knowin' it"

Charlie smiled at her dad, "Dad, if we know where she is, we should just go and talk to her!"

Lucifer shook his head, "Oh. No, no, nonononono, Charlie... I can't do that."

"Why not? Dad, come on, we can try clearing all this up!" Charlie pleaded.

Lucifer sighed, "I just... until I know for sure that she didn't actually ban me, I won't want to risk that. It's just not a good idea... Plus, I don't want to attract more attention to her if she is having issues there," Lucifer hung his head.

Charlie thought for a minute, then a lightblub went off, Charlie got down to Lucifer's eye level, "Dad, she may have "banned" you for seeing her... but not me! I could go talk to her!"

"Charlie, hold on, dis is a bad idea," Angel piped up, everyone looked at him confused, "Rememba' what happened when you tried to talk to Val for me?" Charlie thought for a second remembering the disaster that was, feeling the guilt return at the memory. Angel smiled, "Obviously I need to go with you!" The room erupted into laughter, Angel almost had them for a second, even Lucifer managed to crack a smile in his down mood.

"You guys are really willing to do this for me?" he asked looking to Charlie and Angel.

Charlie looked at Angel and back to her dad, and grabbed Lucifer's hands, "Yes, for you... and for us."

Lucifer smiled, "Ok... but can we actually have dinner before you go? I was anticipating an actual dinner instead of an intervention, but I guess I should have expected both." The room filled with laughter again and the group set up for dinner before Charlie and Angel would head out to find the Lounge, and more importantly, you.

______________________________________________________________

Later that evening, you were hanging out in the lobby of the Lounge, the same way that you had the nights before Lucifer had started to take up more of your schedule. You were still getting clients, but it was back to the old torturous monotony as before, but it somehow felt worse now that you had gotten a taste of love... or what you thought had been love. Every client made you wish you were back in Lucifer's arms, wanting to explore Lucifer's body... not this shithole and all it's shitty clients.

You felt yourself grow more bitter as you saw Cynthhhhia grow back in popularity with the customers, it seemed her few days on the phones really scared her into staying in her lane, especially because Larry had apparently made her take all of the calls during those three days. Something did not sit right with you about her more recent success, but you didn't want to turn into another her. Plus, the happier she was, the more she left you alone. Guess there had to be a bright side, somewhere.

You were sitting on your favorite couch in a long, blue, shear, flowy robe, when you saw a tall pair of individuals walk into the lobby. But not just any two tall people, two that you recognized, Angel and Charlie. You eyes went wide, and you quickly slinked off to the dressing room to hide.

'What the hell? What are they doing there?!' you thought to yourself. You hoped they hadn't seen you, even though your time with Lucifer was up, you still wanted to keep his secret about the two of you.

Charlie and Angel walked up to the front counter where Larry was standing he did a double-take seeing both of them.

"Whoooaaa, Princess Morningstar! And the famous Angel Dust! What an honor to have you two in to join us this evening. Are we interested in having a little fun tonight? I am surprised, I didn't think one of Val's best boys would be needin' to pay for fun. Unless... you are looking for a change in employment?" He flashed a sharp smile.

Charlie piped up, "Hi! Uhh, Charlie is just fine. And no, neither of those things. We are here looking for one of your girls, (y/n)."

"Is she here tonight?" Angel added.

"Uhh... ya. What business do you have with her?" Larry asked, wondering how they knew her.

"She's a friend ah mine," Angel chimed in, "She's mean MIA for a few weeks and we have been worried about 'er, we were wantin' to check in on her. Charlie has gotten to know her a little too and wanted to come with."

"Can we pleaseee see her?" Charlie pleaded.

Larry thought for a moment, "I don't know, she is still on the clock for several more hours. I can't just let her off early." Charlie and Angel look at each other and nod, Charlie pulls out an bunch of cash, "Will this cover her for the rest of the night." Larry smiled as the amount of money in her hands, it was more than enough.

"I do believe that will work Ms. Mornin- uhh, Charlie," Larry said taking the cash, "Let me go get her." Charlie is glad that she learned that in some situations like this, money talked more than words or power. She came more prepared than she had with her conversation with Valentino over getting more of Angel's time.

Larry searched around before finding you in the dressing room, "Hey Babydoll, you've been bought out for the rest of the night by some friends of yours, Angel Dust and Charlie Morningstar. I didn't know you knew them." He said giving you a look.

They bought you out for the rest of the night? Did they come here specifically to find you? How did they know you were here? Did... did Lucifer tell them? You felt some fear and hope bloom in your chest.

"Oh, haha ya, you know me, I'm just not one to talk about my personal life at work," you gave Larry a big smile. He laughed, "Alright, keep your secrets, sounds like they wanted to talk to you about something, worried about you. Go show 'em a good time tonight, ok?" You nodded, and quickly switching out to a more solid less see-through robe, before walking out to the lobby.

Angel and Charlie saw you coming, Charlie ran to you but you stopped her short of you, "Not here, come with me," and you led your friends up to you apartment. Once you were inside you room and the door was locked, you said "Ok now you can hug me if you want to."

This time, both Charlie and Angel want to embrace you at the same time, starting to tear up a little.

"Oh my god, (y/n)! It's so good to see you! We were so worried about you!" Charlie asked.

"Ya! When you and Lucifer stopped showing up at the hotel to visit, we started worrying, babe," Angel added.

"Wait... hold up, Lucifer stopped showing up to the hotel? How did you know I was here?" you asked.

"We sat my Dad down and he finally broke and told us the truth about everything," Charlie said.

"Ya, he spilled da beans on your guy's relationship, you don't have to keep his secret from us anymore," Angel added.

Tears started to well up in your eyes, "I don't?!" The two nodded. You started to sob and hugged them back. "I- I'm so sorry, I- I didn't want to lie to anyone but he wanted to keep it discreet, which I understand, he is the King! And it was so confusing, and then, one night he got really drunk one night, and it worried me, he wasn't acting like himself, and told me he loved me, but, but I didn't know if I could believe him. And he was getting all touchy and doe eyed, and I didn't know what was really what he wanted because it was all so sudden. So I ran! I ran because I was so scared, and- and- and-" Charlie and Angel both hugged you and tried to shushed you through your crying.

"It's ok, no one is mad at you. That sounds like a hard position to be in, it sounds like there was a lot of confusion on both sides," Charlie said.

"Confusion?" you sniffled, "Is that why he hasn't called to schedule with me again?"

Charlie and Angel looked at each other then back to you, "You didn't ban him then?"

You blinked, "WHAT?! Why on earth would anyone think I blocked him?! No! I freaked out and went on a trip for a few days to clear my head. I came back and I was told that he said he would call to reschedule, and then he just never did! I thought he hated me!"

"No!" Charlie cried, "No, Oh my god, he is a total wreck without you! He misses you like crazy! He thinks he was put on your "No Kiss List" or something"

"We can't even say your name without him shuttin' down and lookin' like we killed his dog or somethin'," Angel added, Charlie gave him a look, "What?! It's true!"

You sat down on the couch and stared out for a minute, thinking, "Why didn't he come to ask me himself?"

Charlie shrugged, "He doesn't remember what happened that night, he is convinced that he hurt you terribly and that it's why you banned him. He didn't want to hurt you so he respected that wish. We tried to get him to come tonight but he was scared in case you really had banned him."

You thought for a few more moments, who could have caused this? Who would have done this to you both. Your eyes widened. No, could this have been... did Cynthhhhia do this? Would she have been the one to make the calls that day since that was her punishment. You were pretty sure, but you didn't want to act without proof. You clenched your fists, starting to fill with rage.

"Is he at the hotel?" They nodded. You thought again, "Can you take me to him?" They nodded again with more excitement.

"I have just one question for you, before we go," Charlie started, looking into your eyes, "Tell me truthfully, do you actually care about my dad, not just for an income, but as a person?"

You took Charlie's hands in your own, "Charlie, I really do... more than anything... in fact... I'm pretty sure I'm in love with him." Charlie and Angel squealed and jumped up and down.

"That's all I needed to hear, let's do this!" Charlie declared.

You took a few minutes to get dressed, and soon you were off to see Lucifer again. Cynthhhhia eyed you a little as you left, wondering what you were doing with the most famous porn star in the Pride Ring and the Princess of Hell. She rolled her eyes and went back to chatting it up with her next client out it the lobby, it was probably nothing of substance, and she already had big enough fish to fry to keep her focused on herself. Although, she did briefly amuse herself with the idea of seducing the Princess' father, oh how wonderful a dream that would be, but she knew better than to put more thought into that. Why would the King of Hell ever need a prostitute? She laughed to herself.

You, on the other hand, were so full of fear and excitement at the idea of seeing actually Lucifer again, it felt like a dream and you were scared to wake up. But if Charlie and Angel's reaction was any indication of anything, maybe Brooklyn had been right after all.

______________________________________________________________

Thank you for putting up with torment! I made sure to get through this one quickier so that there was a return of hope. Next chapter they will finally talk in out, and then... a certain someone may see justice 😈

As usual, leave a comment if you want added to the taglist so that you can get notifications when future chapters drop! xoxo, dany (OMG there are so many of you!😍 Please let me know if the tag isn't working for you) Taglist :(red names are not tagging for some reason 😢)

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#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #lucifer x reader #fanfic #fanfic writing #lucifer x y/n #lucifer fanfiction #hazbin lucifer #lucifer #lucifer magne #lucifer hazbin #fanfiction #hazbin hotel fanfiction #slow burn #angst #it will get better

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captainmera · 6 months

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My God I love your depiction of the Wittebane brother ❤️

Do you think there might have been a chance that your Pip wouldn't kill his brother when Calec goes to Demon Realm? He seems way more tolerable of weirdness and is actually curious about the taboo things. That it makes me wonder if other steps were taken by people around him, maybe he would make different choices and not turned into a brother-killing genocide goop man. Obviously, the blame is still his for what he did, but I can't stop wondering what if.

And him getting along with Evelyn instead of hating her right of the bat is really cute.

Thank you! :D <333

He grew up with this theatrical bisexual of a brother. Pretty sure the reason Belos didn't give a hoot on the Boiling Isles about queer stuff is because he kinda knew, and accepted, that Caleb was kinda queer. In some cases, people can ignore or bend certain rules for people they love. Even disregard them or pretend they don't apply or exist.

(long rant about writing and narrative foils and blah blah under the cut)

Unlike Caleb, I think Philip is the sort that only picks-and-chooses whatever rules he feels will supports his personal wants/thoughts and tosses the rest.

Caleb was not hiding it as well as he thought he did. lol.

I think that, sure, there was probably a turning point for Philip.

And absolutely, people around him influenced him. He's just a kid, a vulnerable one at that, in a protestant Christian cult.

I kinda like to think of it as a corruption arc. Mostly because it seems (to me) that the whole reason Luz was meant to have a depression-arc and Philip getting all "YoUrE JuSt LiKe Me!" thing was because.. There was supposed, I think, to be similar beginnings for them.

But Luz, in season 3, got depressed and felt a lot of guilt, so her arc is going from this happy-go-lucky kid interested in different things, to a depression arc where she questions herself. While Philip has a corruption arc, where he gradually goes from a well-meaning kid interested in different things, to evil and delusional.

I am also combining Luz, King, and the Collector into Kid-Philip's themes.

King is fascinating as a pre-narrative foil for kid-Philip. I think. As King was very clingy to Luz and didn't want her to leave, he too had a delusion about his own importance (disregard that it was kinda true in the end there). King tried to dictate (in that book episode) about what his and Luz' book should be about, how it should go, and it really hurt Luz' feelings. In the end, they solved it. But as a narrative foil, I think for the Wittebanes, they probably had a similar struggle on a larger scale, and it didn't get resolved.

The Collector, too! They're desperate to be close with someone, anyone, who gets them and wants to play on their terms. Kinda like Belos wanting him and Caleb to be witch hunters. Not accounting that Caleb is his own person outside of him-- Which, if you think about it, Caleb made his whole life (in my version anyway) about taking care of Philip. So I'm sure Philip felt like he really was Caleb's entire world. And then suddenly he wasn't. Because of a witch. The Collector, despite having this incredible power (just like Pip having his brilliant brain) is still a child and using their power in selfish ways. Not intentionally, I think, just out of a fear of abandonment or isolation.

I personally am in favour of nobody-is-born-evil-but-anyone-can-become-evil kinda thing.

I would like to explore how Philip gets corrupted.

I am slowly influencing Philip in my fanfic with little things that will, eventually, boil down to not so great moments.

The thing about delusions is that the person truly believes in it. Philip believing he's a hero has to make sense and feel believable.

Belos is a jerk. Philip isn't, yet. He becomes that jerk. But I don't want to write a sociopath. I also don't like using less-favourable mental illnesses as an "easy way out" to write why Philip became Belos and a genocidal maniac.

I have strong feelings about de-stigmatizing mental illnesses in writing, without romanticizing them or leaving out the really awful and less discussed sides of it. This includes diagnoses within all the clusters of the DSM5. I will not sit here and say I only support a diagnosis like Autism or GAD, and not things like Histrionic or Borderline.

And including people with MH issues and personality disorders is important, too, as well as not trying to downplay them.

People throw around Belos with things like Narcissism and Psychopath, without actually understanding what those means or what the different types there are. For example, is he a grandiose, oblivious or a fragile narcissist?

Yes, these disorders are looked down upon. A lot of people who have them aren't very nice people. But that doesn't mean they're evil or have no heart.

Lots of children can display early signs of these, and in a rough time like the colonial 1630s of America, it is not unthinkable that those rough times bred some dysfunctional people. I'm sure Philip has his own slices of pie as far as mental health goes, just like Caleb and many other struggling people.

But, I will not write from an angle that implies Philip just has darkness from the start in him.

There's a reason why I had Caleb go on a rant about being born evil in chapter 5. Because puritans, and Christians alike, at the time - truly did believe bastards were just... Half people. Did you know that if an orphanage found out a baby was a bastard, they wouldn't let it suckle the nursery goat's udders. Because they were afraid it would soil the milk and, in turn, might give the non-bastard babies bad influence. Somehow.

With that kind of logic in your culture, it's no rocket science that people would put nonsense together and think it made sense.

I'm much more interested in how puritanism and witch hunting culture influenced and corrupted Philip into becoming who he became, and why he refuses to budge on his beliefs to the point of murder.

As the owl house, the show, has commentary on systems influencing cultures in a bad and positive way. But in particular, the one Belos tries to influence the Demon Realm with; being a not-so-great way. So! With that as a clue: what made Philip turn bad, most likely, was partially the puritanism and its extremist ways. I think TOH is also a bit of a nudge at the HAYS-code of Hollywood and how it has trickled into most all the American culture-core. As it's both trickled into schools, morality, politics and other things outside cinema.

Just pointing at him and going "He's a sociopath because he became a genocidal tyrant" is, to me, cheap. Not only does it further stigmatising mental illnesses by implying only a disorder can make someone do such evil things. But it also disregards the most horrific truth of all; that the true monsters are people not at all unlike yourself. And that they, too, were children once.

#ttocw #caleb wittebane #philip wittebane #toh #the wittebane brothers #the owl house #toh fanartthe owl house fanart #toh comic #wittebros #wittebane #toh caleb #toh philip

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becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys · 2 years

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Is there any chance we could have a round up of the Circus? I am so lost on how the dominoes fell over the last 40 days

Okay this is not comprehensive, because (a) my husband the politics nerd is currently on his way to a gig in west Wales somewhere and so cannot chime in and also (b) all our political journalist friends are understandably quite busy right now doing political journaling, but I seem to have an influx of new followers who are also very confused and don't understand what's going on, so I shall try.

Alright so what we're seeing here is the Second Clownfall of 2022, the hotly anticipated sequel to the Adventures of Big Dog the Clown. However it revolves around the character of Liz Truss, and will use some terminology, so

Previous Reading

Important Terminology - Required Reading

What is a Whip?

How do Whips work?

Shadow Cabinet

Front Benchers, Back Benchers and the Cabinet

What do we need to call an early General Election?

The Adventures of Big Dog the Clown - Suggested Reading

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Elanor's Guide to Liz Truss - Suggested Reading

Character-based prequel

...okay I think that's everything. On with the show!

The Premiership of Liz Truss (2022-2022)

Week One

We begin our tale on September 5th, 2022. Coincidentally, that was also the date that I personally started my new job. Let's see which of us does better!

The Daily Mail is delighted, and runs a headline proclaiming "Cometh the hour, cometh the woman". Tory rag in a frock coat the Financial Times runs an op-ed:

So the results ARE IN! She will definitely fuck us up! But that's a good thing for vague reasons! Blitz spirit everyone. Tally ho, pip pip, shoot a servant and have sex with a wall, hey what. Good old Blighty.

(That's my best impression of Tories I'm good at their accents I hope you like it)

Truss does an interview with Laura Kuenssberg, and fellow guest and comedian Joe Lycett wildly and effusively applauds her every word. Even Liz realises no one would sincerely applaud her. Bafflingly, the entire right wing press and every member of the Tory party freak out about this, because they don't understand the function of a satirist and don't know how to defend against it. It is extremely funny. Joe Lycett announces he's a right-wing comedian now, and begins a new extended career bit effusively and sarcastically praising right wing politicians. They all cry extensively and call him mean.

SO, it's been a long hard leadership campaign! But she made it. For years, Tories have been blighted by the curse of the PM/Chancellor relationship, backstabbing and cheating and lying about each other to try and get power. But not our Liz, oh no; her Chancellor is Maths Mate and BFF Kwasi Kwarteng, an insipid and poisonous gnome known for three (3) things:

He once wrote a stupid book with Liz Truss about his stupid opinions on how he thinks economics work and everyone laughed at him and stuffed him in a locker

On the night of the Brexit vote he was overheard by a journalist gleefully saying “Who cares if sterling crashes? It will come back up again“ which are of course the words of a man who knows all about economics and how they work

This fucking bullshit back in July:

But hey IT'S OKAY! Everything is fine! Because Liz and Kwasi are BFFs who certainly never had an affair and are marching in lockstep and have each other's backs and both love maths more than their own children if they had any! Maths Friends!

Multiple resignations immediately follow.

Among them is Ben Elliot, the Tory Party chair, which is a pretty big deal from a man who just lived through the Johnson years; also, shockingly, Priti Patel, the deportation-happy Home Secretary, decides that even as an animatronic goblin she cannot support this nonsense.

It's not a resignation per se, but at ten to seven in the evening it's announced that Andrew Bridgen, the Troy MP for Leicestershire North West, has been evicted from his home and ordered to pay £800,000 in legal costs, and a possible £244,000 in rent arrears. Also described as "dishonest" by a judge.

This is not directly relevant to Liz Truss but look, it was a staggeringly weird day and this was basically the topper.

Anyway.

Liz goes to the Palace and is duly sworn in by the Queen, who promptly keels over and dies the very next day. Parliament is instantly shut down for mandatory mourning. As omens go, this one was not subtle.

This triggers the circulation of some very awkward footage of Young Truss talking about how she thinks the Monarchy should be abolished for being a gross relic of horrifying social stratification. However you must understand that it's not awkward because anyone thinks she murdered the Queen. It's because Liz Truss's attempts at public speaking are like sitting through a children's Christmas play when you're the only person in the audience and they can all see your face so you have to look encouraging for four hours when inside you are shrivelling into something approximating an apricot pit travelling to the core of Jupiter.

Take a look at her acceptance speech and wither.

Anyway we're now several MPs and a queen down so she's got to get on replacing those so she can focus on her real love: the much-anticipated mini-budget that she is preparing with Kwasi to save the UK from the harrowing quagmire of crippling poverty that Big Dog managed to drive us into (all while pretending it wasn't Big Dog who did it.)

Fortunately, she does not need to replace the queen! Monarchies take care of themselves, which many people would argue is very much the problem, of course. They had a proper reunion with Meghan From Suits and Meghan From Suits' husband, both of whom were banned from visiting Balmoral, and also the Nonce flew in, who was allowed to visit Balmoral. Such heartwarming scenes.

But the Cabinet, that's another matter. That's something Liz DOES have to do, and it's important she gets it right, Tumblrs, because you see, every time a Cabinet minister is replaced it's expensive and a hassle and it weakens a government by making them look all crumbly, like a packet of biscuits that's been rammed against a wall and now someone is opening it and everyone is bracing for Crumbs.

So, step forward to the Cabinet soulless ghoul Suella Braverman, the new Home Secretary. She immediately distinguishes herself by trying to legalise torture.

And then, naturally,

YEAH THAT'S RIGHT IT'S TICK TOCK TERF O'CLOCK also FUCK the sovereignty of the Scottish Parliament amirite ladies lol Girl Power uwu

Not that she can actually do anything at this point, of course. As I say: Enforced Mourning is in process, which means Parliament is shut down for ten days. No work, no speeches, no appearances, no announcements, just taxpayer's money going on legal fees to see if she can interfere with another nation's elected government in order to strip away the human rights of queer people.

However, while we all weep over the corpse of Queen Lizzie Two and beat our breasts in grief, the already-beleaguered pound is slowly bleeding out through this inaction. And this, to the Maths Mates, is unacceptable.

Two things get quietly slid into the news cycle.

Thing the First:

BIG YIKES LADS

Thing the Second:

Fracking ban in England lifted in bid to boost UK gas supply - BBC News

For those who don't know, fracking is an energy extraction process. Water, gas and dust are pumped at high pressure into shale bedrock to crack it open, releasing pockets of natural gas that can then be harvested for fuel. It's environmentally disastrous for multiple reasons, both direct (earthquakes, groundwater pollution, social impacts) and indirect (IT'S STILL A FOSSIL FUEL YOU STUPID CUNTS ARE YOUR SKULLS FUCKING EMPTY). The Welsh and Scottish governments have both banned it outright, a straight-up "Foot down no, petal". England, though, is the Tory paradise, so the ban was less complete.

However, this is still a Huge Deal - the 2019 Tory manifesto was very clear that fracking would only be unbanned IF "the science shows categorically that it can be done safely". In fact, most Tories don't like it either. Their constituents REALLY don't. Also in March Kwasi Kwarteng literally went on record and said it wouldn't lower European gas prices anyway; but not anymore! Now he thinks it's a zippy idea. Just spiffing. Top hole, pip pip (I'm so good at their accents :))

Scientists who have been studying the environmental impacts of fracking produce their report -

And it is quietly buried, so as not to offend the corpse of Lizzie Two.

Here ends the first four days of the Reign of Liz Truss.

Second Week

Anyway, royalists have gone insane and started a REALLY BIG queue to see a box that supposedly contains the rotting cadaver of the old queen. Multiple people have to be hospitalised because they join the Queue and don't take food, water, warm clothes, or essential daily medications with them, even though the Queue is literally days long. Some die. Many take the ashes of their own loved ones so they can wave them at the box for the thirty seconds they get to be in front of it, like a sort of play date for ashes.

Prince Charles, now King Prince Charles, starts swanning about as King, demanding everyone be sad for him and clap him to cheer him up. Someone holds up a sign saying 'Not my King' and gets arrested. This triggers a whole wave of protests and arrests as free speech slides out the window, until the Met Police chief has to step in and explain to the police like they're five-year-olds that they can't do that, actually, and need to cut that shit out.

But we can't wholly blame the police, because the main pressure to clamp down on protestors actually came from...

The government.

Meanwhile the country goes bat shit fucking insane. In order not to offend the fragile sensibilities of royalists, now so brittle they need to be treated with the same delicate touch normally reserved for unstable nitroglycerin, the UK sees supermarkets lowering the volume of self-serve checkout desks, people's funerals cancelled, vital operations and other medical interventions postponed, Centre Parcs cancelling holidays, FOOD BANKS CLOSING, Nintendo Direct cancelling its live stream in Britain (but not cancelling the release of the recording onto You Tube an hour later because as we all know Queen Elizabeth II was a MASSIVE livestream fan and would have been DEVASTATED to miss it but she was very 'meh' about YouTube), cycle racks being closed, and this unhinged shrieking harridan:

Very normal, lads. Very normal.

Oh and also they cancelled Owain Glyndwr Day so as a Welsh person I am now legally allowed to forcibly ram a daffodil into the urethras of the landed English gentry.

However, the protests grow as the suppression wanes. By the time King Prince Charles comes to Wales, he is met with silent protests, this guy who learned a sentence in Welsh specially for the occasion, and a petition to abolish the Prince of Wales title.

Except government is still shut down, so the petitions are all suspended.

But not to worry! That gives the Maths Mates more time to work on their special mini-budget.

Week Three

More of the same at first, really, but she finally addresses the nation to announce that the Queen was the "rock" on which "modern Britain was built".

Also someone finally spots that the necklace she always wears is a day collar, so that was fun.

BUT THEN

The moment we have all been waiting for, with baited breath.

On the 23rd September, 2022, the mini-budget finally arrives. The golden egg of Kwasi and Liz, their beloved, beautiful child, the crowning glory, the culmination of their economic beliefs and values. They are so proud of it, so sure of it, that they do not even submit it for the approval of the Office for Budget Responsibility. Why should they? This is the moment Kwarteng can finally show the world that he was right; that this is the way to do economics after all; that he alone in his brilliance and genius has reinvented the field and will lead the country to a new era of riches and prosperity.

And the pound does this:

Yikes.

Truss goes into hiding for a day and a half, during which time her aids claim all her relatives have died so she won't have to speak to the press, which is obviously a simply fantastic quality in a Prime Minister. Finally, she resurfaces by doing a series of radio interviews for regional stations around the UK, hoping they'll be easier on her, starting with Radio Leeds. The good journalists of Yorkshire eviscerate her and strew her corpse through Adel Woods. It's downhill from there.

Week Four

One poll puts Labour 33 points ahead of the Tories.

It can be a little difficult to translate polls, because the electoral system is complex, so I asked my journalist friends. They cheerfully informed me that, if translated into a General Election, the Tories would have just 3 seats left.

Except! Of course, naturally, that is me reporting naught but the most extreme result, Tumblrs, dancing upon the bones of my enemies as I chant the rites to make the Tory party die faster. If I were to be fair about this - and I am, of course, a journalist of Integrity and Morals - I would actually give the average poll result. And I am wise and fair to all, ancient rites aside, so I shall.

The average poll result is still 19 points ahead.

Tony Blair's landslide Labour victory in 1999 was 12 points.

Rounding off the day, Labour declare that they are backing a change to a proportional representation voting system in place of the UK’s archaic first past the post system. Funny that.

Anyway, that mini-budget is going poorly. Realising unlimited borrowing rather than tax cuts for the rich is maybe Bad Actually, the Maths Mates decide to get the money for their bail-outs some other way. Can you guess, Tumblrs? Can you guess where they decide to get the money from?

Naturally.

Week Five

In a fascinating little twist, the papers claim Liz banned King Prince Charles from going to the Climate Summit in Egypt. This is interesting for about a billion reasons, not least of which is that the papers seem very angry about this and yet also that it's an unsubstantiated rumour - the phrase "it's understood that _" gets a hell of a workout.

She then does not go herself. Makes sense. They'll probably be mean to her about the fracking.

She then loses the support of the Daily Mail, a paper that five weeks before were ecstatic about her rise to power :( so sad. But why? What made them change their minds?

Well. What else from Truss, but a massive and catastrophic u-turn on the economy?

And she does! The absolute nutter!

Plans to cut the 45p tax rate for those earning upwards of £150,000 were abandoned, as were:

abolishing the planned rise in corporation tax

cutting the basic rate of income tax

the two-year energy bill support plan

scrapping the planned dividend tax hike

VAT-free shopping for international tourists

freezing alcohol duty

easing of IR25 rules for the self-employed

ALL GONE! All gone. The mini-budget is not working so lol jk we'll think of something else, that's how government works, right? The pound promptly implodes further. Of all people, Nadine Dorries is the one to criticise

WE ARE IN A TOPSY TURVEY UPSIDE DOWN WORLD

The Daily Mail still finds a way to say it's all Michael Gove's fault, though.

Anyway, the 5th October dawns bright and beautiful and YouGov polls rural voters:

THIS IS HUUUUUUUUUGE, because farmers just will not fucking stop voting Tory, AND YET. Wowsers. Not just popularity. Voting intention. She might as well have personally infected every farm in the South Downs with foot and mouth disease.

Truss realises her popularity is plummeting and she needs a new audience. She tries to appear down with the kids and declares that she's the only PM to have gone to a comprehensive school.

This is not true. Gordon Brown and Theresa May both did. However, it's certainly true that all three of them became PM by ousting a sitting PM, so there's that I guess.

Week Six

At this point I can start putting in PRECISE DATEs just call ME Robert Peston.

13th October

News reporters start speculating that she'll be done by the end of the month as the first rumoured letter of no confidence reaches us. People realise that her competition for shortest serving PM was a guy who died in office of TB at about the four month mark RIP king sorry about your lungs.

(A reminder - normally, if MPs want to oust a party leader, they must send in 54 letters of no confidence. This makes the 1922 Committee - a bunch of back benchers who preside over this shit - hold a vote of no confidence. A leader who loses gives way - this is very rare. A leader who wins is then immune to another such vote for 12 months, but they almost always crumble within a month or two anyway - this is much more common.)

This is extremely funny, because a newly-elected leader of the party has a 12 month immunity to votes of no confidence, same as people who've won such a vote. Likes charge reblogs cast apparently. MPs are getting desperate.

Pressure mounts. Chancellor Kwasi Kwarteng announces that he is "Not going anywhere."

14th October

Chancellor Kwasi Kwarteng is sacked and blamed for the entire economic mess.

Incredibly, Liz does this without first planning a replacement, so it's several hours before Jeremy Cunt suddenly reappears like the spectre at the fucking feast.

Meanwhile here's Ed Milliband on Twitter

Seven and a half years he waited to retweet that. Seven and a half long years, look, to have the last laugh.

In the end, he still went too soon.

15th October

Deputy PM and also Health Minister Therese Coffey (side note - have they always doubled up in roles like that? Or are there just not enough of them anymore?) announces that she loves antibiotic resistance and dead kids and also breaking laws:

16th October

The Sunday Times calls for Extremely Corrupt Former Grand Vizier Rishi Sunak to take over, and then a General Election so that Labour can take the reins.

The SUNDAY TIMES

Calling for LABOUR

The Sunday Mail tries to stir up support for Ben Wallace taking over, because no one has heard of Ben Wallace so he needs the boost, but then accidentally publish their front page with a different man

In another YouGov poll for the Times, not a single political group, age group, area of the country, gender, or other demographic said that Liz Truss was the right choice for PM

This is the new predicted election graph:

Yikes

17th October

The projected election results are a Labour victory so complete the opposition would be the SNP. Legend suggests Nicola Sturgeon's cackle on finding out was so powerful she accidentally resurrected a witchfinder.

18th October

Meanwhile in the Senedd, Welsh Tory leader Andrew RT Davies, a sort of humanoid boil dressed in ham, tries to accuse placid and gentle First Minister for Wales Mark Drakeford's Labour of being responsible for long ambulance waiting times.

T'was a mistake.

youtube

19th October

Oh boy.

Well, first of all, Suella Braverman sends an official email from her private email address, and then promptly leaves the Cabinet at cannonball speeds as though she's seen a brown child about to be given citizenship. Was she quietly fired by Jeremy Cunt? Did she do it deliberately to resign? On her way out, she blames the true source of our problems - the Guardian-reading, tofu-eating Wokerati.

Nigella Lawson spends the day tweeting tofu recipes.

Meanwhile, Graham Brady, the Chair of the 1922 Committee, comes to Liz Truss to inform her that he has in fact now received 54 letters of no confidence. Normally, of course, that would be considered enough to trigger a vote in her leadership; but not now.

However, these are unprecedented times. So he changes the threshold - if half of the Tories send him letters, her immunity will be revoked.

But the thing is, Tumblrs, the thing is...

It is all about to kick off in the most spectacular and catastrophic fireworks since Guy Fawkes had a dream.

Because Ed Milliband, once accused of leading the country to chaos and now riding high on the joy of his well-timed Twitter jab of Some Days Ago, wakes this morning and chooses violence.

He has spotted, of course, that no one likes fracking; even the Tories are against it.

He has also spotted that Liz Truss is very stupid.

So he goes into the House of Commons, and he digs a big pit and covers it over with twigs and leaves so it can't be seen, and he bakes a big cake and he places it in the middle of the twigs, and he sets up a net to fall as well and a big stick of ACME dynamite, and he hammers in little signs everywhere saying CAUTION - TRAP, by which I am of course being metaphorical because what he actually does is table a motion to extend the moratorium on fracking. The signs aren't necessary, really. This trap is easy to avoid.

All Liz Truss has to do, you see, is not use a three-line whip on this vote.

The three-line whip, as you'll all recall, is the highest level of coercion. MPs cannot defy a three-line whip. MPs cannot even abstain on a three-line whip. MPs have two choices on a three-line whip: to vote as they're told, or to be removed from the party. You obey or resign. That's all.

For this reason, it's sometimes called a 'confidence vote', as it is effectively a stand-in for one. The vote is not about the issue at hand - this is now a vote of confidence in your leader.

(He's also laid lesser traps. Years back when fracking was first being heavily discussed, Ed was Labour leader and one of the main figures in those discussions. During today, before it all Kicks The Fuck Off, a Tory stands and challenges him on previous statements about fracking, trying to accuse him of hypocrisy.

He was fucking ready for it.)

Graham Brady pops his head back around the door. He's changed his mind - a third of the party is all that's needed now to trigger a vote of no confidence in Liz Truss. And legend says he's only 17 off.

This is presumably the reason for what comes next.

Liz panics. Liz sees she's desperately unpopular. Liz sees that she has to do something to shore up support; and she sees that her important fracking rule, which her party hates her for, is now being challenged by a former Labour leader, and if he wins (which he will) she'll lose all credibility and maybe they'll take her nice office away and tell her she was a Bad Girl.

And so, with the inevitability of gravity on the now-leaden pound sterling, she makes it a three-line whip, and a confidence vote in her government.

INSTANT CHAOS.

There is uproar! There is rage! There is blinding fury! Tory MPs are standing up in the Commons and snarling and pissing and moaning! No one likes fracking except Jacob Rees Mogg! For TWO HOURS they shriek and scream and gnash their teeth, yelling at Liz Truss, demanding to know why this is happening.

(Legend has it chaos-deity Ed Milliband simply leaned back, put his feet up on the chair in front, and made Christian Wakeford hand-feed him grapes and fan him with a palm leaf, but this is unsubstantiated.)

And then, at 6.55, FIVE MINUTES before voting is ready to begin, the Tory Minister for Climate Graham Stewart stands up and declares that everyone should vote how they want because it's not a confidence vote.

Did I say there was chaos before?

Lol. Lmao, even. Rofl, in fact.

Now Tories leap to their feet and basically all scream one long, unending breath of WHAT-DO-YOU-MEAN-IT'S-NOT-A-CONFIDENCE-VOTE-WHAT-THE-FUCK-IS-HAPPENING-IS-IT-OR-IS-IT-NOT-A-CONFIDENCE-VOTE and so Stewart gets up again and says, right to everyone's faces, "It's not for me to say whether it's a confidence vote or not," which is an even faster and more spectacular u-turn than Truss herself could pull off given that he literally just said it wasn't and did so while being a minister.

And then the voting starts. MPs are now milling about like chickens who've sighted the hawk, clamouring to know if they're going to lose their jobs unless they vote for Satan. The Whips - specifically Chief Whip Wendy Morton and Deputy Chief Whip Craig Whittaker - descend upon them like fucking wargs on the hunt. They don't just spit vitriol and blackmail into MPs ears. They fucking bodily drag people into the right voting lobby. MPs are legitimately screaming. Grown men are crying literal tears. Labour's Chris Bryant reports holding multiple Tory MPs as they sob into his shoulder. Multiple MPs report similar scenes.

And Tories still don't know if this is even a damn confidence vote, or if they should just knock the Chief Whip's teeth out.

And then the Whips, filled with bloodlust and frenzy, suddenly realise that NO ONE IS LISTENING TO US, YOU'RE ALL SUPPOSED TO LISTEN TO US SO WE FEEL POWERFUL -

Cue sudden meeting in a locked room with Liz Truss. For over HALF AN HOUR.

So is it a confidence vote? No one is sure. Deputy PM Therese Coffey thinks so, so in the absence of the Whips she decides physical assault is her job now and is seen by David Linden MP (SNP) physically carrying someone into the voting lobby. Jacob Rees Mogg thinks not and starts yelling "It's not a confidence vote!", to which his colleagues reply, "Fuck off." Meanwhile the Whips have possibly resigned, no one is sure. It is still uncertain if this was a confidence vote.

And Ed Milliband basks in the chaos, playing the fiddle while it all burns around him.

Finally, voting concludes. The Whips reappear to lurk.

The votes are in - the government wins, and fracking will go ahead. But.

32 MPs abstained.

And one of those is Liz Truss.

Which is WILD??!? What possible benefit could she get from that??? No one knows. Everything is uproar again. Guess who else abstained? Well, riveted reader, here's a list with important names highlighted:

Nigel Adams, Gareth Bacon, Siobhan Baillie, Greg Clark, Sir Geoffrey Cox, Tracey Crouch, David Davis, Dame Caroline Dinenage, Nadine Dorries, Philip Dunne, Mark Fletcher, Vicky Ford, Paul Holmes, Alister Jack, Boris Johnson, Gillian Keegan, Kwasi Kwarteng, Robert Largan, Pauline Latham, Mark Logan, Theresa May, Priti Patel, Mark Pawsey, Angela Richardson, Andrew Rosindell, Bob Seely, Alok Sharma, Chris Skidmore, Henry Smith, Ben Wallace, Sir John Whittingdale, and William Wragg.

Kwasi still smarting about that p45, I see.

In any case it then turns out that Liz DID vote, but incompetently, because her voting card didn't read properly, which is actually fair given that she was being screamed at by angry Whips waving Graham Stewart's severed dick and balls around while they demanded power and authority. While she's clearing that up, the press are understandably waiting open-mouthed for comment, but don't worry Liz! Your old pal Jacob Rees Mogg is here to fill in for you!

And thus it is that JRM willingly chooses to go on the live news and calmly confirm to the nation that no one knows if it was a confidence vote or not.

Chaos. Chaos again. Unbridled chaos. The Whips are furious. Everyone is furious. The rebels are now in limbo, unsure if they're now out of a job. Tories are weeping, trying to work out if Rees Mogg WANTS to sink the party. Back bencher Charles Walker MP delivers a frank interview to the press absolutely SHIVERING with rage, like the drummer in a Fleetwood Mac concert. Ex-Lib Dem leader Tim Farron, a bland man known only for the time he himself willingly chose to go on the news and calmly explain that he's a homophobe without provocation, tweets that Liz Truss is a Lib Dem sleeper agent they sent in to destroy the Tories, sparking what is likely to be a whole slew of conspiracy theories by next week. No one knows what is going on. They all decide to sleep on it.

The good folks at Wikipedia ultimately decide to make three separate pages for the UK 2022 government crisis, and to label them with the month "to leave room for another by the end of the year."

Ed Milliband skips all the way home, and treats himself to a bacon sandwich.

20th October

Okay, Liz thinks, the morning after. Okay. Last night was bad. But today will be better.

So first... the vote.

Because there's bad news for Tories who like money and good news for people who like liveable planets - there are problems with the vote. For one, the vote counts are being called into question. Are the results reliable?

For another, the Speaker of the House of Commons calls for an investigation into the reports of, um, assault. So will the result stand?

It's so unclear! And so is that ongoing issue of whether or not the damn thing was a confidence vote. Angry whips say YES, JRM says NO, Downing Street refuses to pick up the phone to the BBC, but does send ITV's Robert Peston a text at 1am to say it was definitely a confidence vote and, unrelatedly, the Whips aren't resigning :)

I think we have found the price paid to keep the Whips.

Meanwhile. Let's see what this has done for Liz's leadership stability!

13 letters of no confidence are confirmed submitted by Sky, 5 of which came in overnight. The 1922 Committee reconvenes the coven to discuss matters. Simultaneously, the One Nation Conservatives reconvene their coven to discuss the same. Presumably there is much "Girl what are YOU doing at the Devil's Sacrament?"-ing and "Same cloak, how embarrassing"-ing. MPs are CLAMOURING for her head. It is VICIOUS. It's like cartoon piranhas in a supervillain's lair; which is highly appropriate, because that's exactly what Tory MPs are.

Graham Brady, head jester of the 1922 Committee, demands to see Liz Truss.

He walks into a room with her, and the doors are closed. Half an hour later, he walks back out of the room.

Ten minutes later, she calls a press conference.

45 days after being appointed, Liz Truss breaks the record, and becomes the shortest-serving British Prime Minister.

#politik #the second clownfall of 2022

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shae-pine · 16 days

Text

I Explain the Context for the songs in The Outsiders Musical

Spoilers for the Musical under cut! I was lucky enough to see the show in person so now that the album is out I decided to provide context for the songs so people listening to the album can know where in the story each one takes place/what is happening on stage during. Also some fun tidbits sprinkled in because this show is really so amazing I can not praise it enough.

Tulsa '67:

The self-explained exposition song. We get the intro being the first line of the book and then we get the song as out introductions to the characters. One thing that is interesting is that there's a projector screen on stage and for this song Pony sits in front of the screen and speaks to the audience while the other characters are behind the screen. Acting out little scenes to show their personality while Ponyboy narrates and at the end of the song the screen lifts up to show a clear view of the stage. It's also right before Ponyboy gets jumped.

Grease Got a Hold:

Right after Ponyboy gets jumped. Like the song says in this version of the story a greaser isn't just something you are born into it's something you "earn" by being beaten down on by the socs. It shows the differences in each character most notably Darry and Dally because Darry hates the idea of Pony being stuck as a greaser, presumably because he wants more for his little brother, while Dally sees being a Greaser as something to be proud of. Presumably the first time Ponyboy gets to grease his hair (this song was also performed on the Today show and I highly recommend looking up the performance it's so good, it should be available on the today show website along with the other songs performed that day)

Runs in the Family:

Darry gets a song! After the previous song we cut to Darry in the Curtis home reflecting on where he was going in life versus where he ended up. In the musical the fact that Darry would be a soc without the gang is played up a lot more. The emphasize Darry's friendship with Paul and their history seems to go a lot deeper than just football buddies. Paul mentions gifting Darry a madras shirt and Darry being over at his house. The rest of the gang piles in at the end of the song.

Great Expectations:

The titular 'I want' song in any musical. The night after getting jumped Ponyboy tells Soda about reading great expectations and after Soda bids him goodnight he starts singing. When he mentions Darry and Johnny the actors come on stage. And at the end of the song the chorus of overlapping voices is the whole gang on the outskirts of the stage looking down/at Pony while Ponyboy sings out to the audience. (This song was also performed on the Today show)

Friday at the Drive-In:

The Soc introduction song. I think an important thing to note is that while the greasers dancing is far more rough and tumble. Jumping around and over each other, spinning and getting out nervous energy. The socs are far more reserved in their movements. They are still dancing around with spins and flips but this scene features a lot of partner dancing that's more self contained than the greasers who jump all around the stage.

I Could Talk To You All Night:

After Johnny tells Dally off/Dally leaves. Ponyboy and Cherry go to the concessions stand together. While in line Ponyboy tells her about Johnny getting jumped to which Cherry tries to defend Bob as Ponyboy already knows it was her boyfriend who beat Johnny up. Her defending him is half hearted though when Pony insists Johnny didn't do anything, he mentions reading Great Expectations to her and she tells him how Pip gets a happy ending before they start this song. It carries the story forward up until the end of the movie/the scene where they try to walk the girls home only for Bob and the socs to stop him. Also, in the musical Cherry does not go with Bob and instead breaks up with him right then and there because she's tired of all the fighting.

Runs in the Family(Reprise):

Ponyboy and Johnny make it to the Curtis house and instead of falling asleep at the lot it's stated that Ponyboy just spent so long talking to Cherry that that was why he was late for curfew. He acts nonchalant about it and Darry bursts into the reprise. There's also a scene here where Darry goes to advance on Johnny only for Soda to step between him(I think this was meant to be a moment where Darry is just lashing out because he's under a lot of stress as a guardian and Johnny is there but it hurts my heart a little to think Johnny was scared in that moment as he backs up and ducks away before Soda steps in front of him) And after the slap Ponyboy freezes until Johnny runs over and tells him they gotta get out of there.

Far Away From Tulsa:

After getting hit is when the two wind up at the park. Their conversation in the book about a life outside of Tulsa is now taking place after Darry has hit Ponyboy which makes his desire to find a place without worries all the more real. Johnny and Pony have this beautiful moment on stage together where they look out to the audience together and imagine a life where they can do and be whoever they want. Which makes it hurt all the more that right after they sing all their desires for a better life is when Bob and the rest of the socs show up.

Run Run Brother:

The two make it to Buck's after the stabbing of Bob where they ask for Dally. It's worth mentioning that Dally straight up mentions his willingness to die for Pony and Johnny, and that he thinks of the two of them as brothers, though I can not remember if this happens here or after 'Grease Got A Hold'. After the first bit of the song the scene shifts from Buck's to Pony and Johnny running to the train/hiding from the workers as they make their way to Windrixville. There's also a line in the beginning when Pony says 'when I came to there was Johnny with his knife' this is important and I'll explain in 'Little Brother.' I also really like the detail of before, during 'Grease Got a Hold', 'you're a greaser now and you ain't going back' was said as a proud statement and now when the chorus sings it it sounds sad and almost like a death sentence.

Justice for Tulsa:

We cut back to Tulsa after the boys escape. The cops line up the socs on the stage as they call for justice now that one of their own has been murdered. When Cherry speaks she is doing it from the police station since she was Bob's girlfriend before leaving to talk to Randy who is organizing a hunting party against the greasers. It's worth mention that when Cherry speaks against him Marcia tries to go to her side only for the other soc girl in the show(Bev) to hold her back. Cherry leaves alone and once she's gone Marcia pick up a flashlight, which serves as the symbol for the socs hunting down the greasers with no mercy during this scene. Where in the book Dally mentions Two-Bit getting jumped during this song we see it happen. The socs jump him and Bev holds a lit cigarette to his cheek while the guys hold him down(in the live version of this song we hear Two-Bit's scream) It's worth mentioning that Randy does not get a redemption in this version, in fact, outside of Cherry the socs are pretty much painted at the bad guys with her as the one exception. Even though we get Randy's emotions with 'this can't be real, he can't be gone' rather than feeling sadness over his friend's death for too long Randy switches to anger. Cherry's role as such has been adapted to be a mix of her and Randy from the book in terms of story beats.

Death's At My Door:

The boy's are in the church, as far as I can recall this was after they cut their hair and I believe it was meant to be implied that a day or two has passed since Bob's death. Though if this is before or after Pony read the poem I no longer remember. The two boys are relying on each other in this scene as they reflect on how nothing is gonna be the same again what with their ability to go home taken away unless they want Johnny to be thrown in jail. Something I forgot to mention before is that Pony blames himself for his parents death. In the musical he say that on Darry's birthday he was supposed to pick up a special frosting for his brother's cake from a bakery his mother liked. But because he forgot his parents had to go out of their way to go and get it and thus were hit by the train because they had to go over the tracks. He tells Cherry before 'I Could Talk To You For Hours' that if he had just remembered his parents would still be alive. Which is why in this song he claims death follows him because he believes his parent's would still be alive if he had remembered to pick up the frosting, and that Bob would still be alive if he hadn't run out of the house/if Johnny didn't need to protect him.

Throwing in the Towel:

We cut back to Darry and Soda after the boys have been missing for a few days. Darry finally breaks down to Soda all the pressure he's under and how he feels like his brother's would be better off without him. He admits how much he thinks this is all his fault for being too hard on Pony and causing him to storm off after hitting him. During this scene while Soda and Darry are singing Ponyboy can be seen at the back on the stage watching them, and during the last chorus of the song 'this it the darkest hour of the darkest night' his voice joins his brothers. (This song was also performed on the Today Show and you should go watch it)

Soda's Letter:

Back in the church now right after Dally gets there after greeting Pony and Johnny he hands over the letter for Pony to read. Ponyboy reads it at the front of the stage while Soda's actor sing behind him/looking at him. Pretty much unchanged in terms of what Soda's letter gives to the story/when it given/read. The final "Ponyboy this house ain't a home without you" is sung by Darry who makes his way onto stage when Soda mentions him in the letter and we see him behind Ponyboy all but begging his brother to come home in this song.

Hoods Turned Heroes:

This is the fire song. We see Pony, Dally and Johnny in the church, I saw Pony light the cigarette and toss it behind him. I saw the flames go up and a terrified Ponyboy going "it's my fault" and then we cut to Two-Bit, grabbing the paper and beginning this song. We see a somewhat split stage in terms of spacing, the greasers back in Tulsa on one side, passing the newspaper between them as they read it, and we see Pony and Johnny in the middle saving the kids from the church. The scene is actually so creatively done and I adore it, outside of the fire they have two actors hold up a blanket and use shadows to show Pony and Johnny pulling kids from the fire since there are no child actors in this production. Interlaced with the puppetry of the saving kids we see Johnny and Pony sliding out from under the blanket and jump around beams that are held up by other actors while the paper is being read. All ending with Dally going in after Johnny. The scene changes to Dally holding Johnny, who's been changed into a hospital gown, and Dally gently lays him on the hospital bed when the song ends.

Hopeless War:

Before the rumble Pony does not leave the hospital. He stays there watching Johnny until Cherry comes in. She looks at Johnny, asking after his health, before turning to Pony and begging him not to fight. But if you recall earlier, as far as the musical is concerned the fire was set by Ponyboy's cigarette(sidenote: I think it'd be cool if every night they rotated who lights the cigarette and throws it and just switch Pony's line from "it's my fault" to "it's our fault" but I only saw the show once so I assume it's the same every time for who lights the fire even though it the book and movie we don't know for sure) So Pony can't listen to Cherry, even though in this scene she's taking the place of Pony's discussion with Randy in the book about the fight not making areal difference, because he sees this as his only chance to try and do something for Johnny since he can't do much else but watch over him in the hospital.

Trouble:

We cut to directly after Pony's discussion with Cherry. The greasers have their war cry of trouble brewing as everyone prepares for the rumble. While Ponyboy gets ready Darry comes up and begs him not to fight. If you recall during "Grease Got a Hold" Darry says how Pony "better know what you're fighting for" But he still doesn't want his brother to have to fight. But by this point Pony had his reason for fighting and he's the one to rally the gang with the call of "Do it for Johnny!" right before the socs roll up. Dally does say “do it for Johnny” at the beginning of the song but it’s Ponyboy who uses it as a war cry. Dally also has a moment where he calls out Darry for being on the greasers side when he was so against being a greaser before, but Darry looks at him and says confidently "once a greaser always a greaser". Paul has a moment with Darry where he calls him out for wanting to be a soc but Darry shuts him right down and the rumble is on.

Little Brother:

Right after the rumble the entire gang heads over to see Johnny, yes, the entire gang. Not just Pony and Dally everyone gathers around him and tells him about beating the socs. They watch as Johnny tells Pony to stay gold and they all break down when he passes, Dally runs out before anyone can stop him. He makes it to the top of the stage, and he begins his song. breaking down the boards around him in a show of anger and violence while the ensemble sings below him looking up. He says tearfully "I could not save you" remember during 'Run run brother' where I said the knife would be brought up later? It's because Dally was the one to give him the switchblade. Before the socs get their number Dally comes across Johnny staying in the lot while his parents are fighting. He tells Dally how he's been uncertain since he was jumped to be out alone. So Dally reaches into his jacket, pulls out the blade, and gives it to him(that one promo pic) and Dally tells him that "if you're gonna use it, use it" and I believe he says something along the lines of "because if you do there's no going back" Dally gave Johnny that knife to try and protect him, but all it did was sign his death warrant. It protected him from Bob but not from anything else, not from the fire. And when Dally said he would die for Pony and Johnny he meant it. He sings and is joined by the cast who echo him "little brother" but he stands alone at the top of the stage. He makes his way down to the bottom portion of the stage, stepping onto the train tracks(in my mind it's the same spot where the Curtis' parents crashed) planting his feet and squaring his shoulders before the song ends, and the train comes. According to Ponyboy his body derailed the train, and Pony likes to believe that despite that, some part of Dallas Winston managed to make it's way back to New York. (Playbill released Joshua Boone singing this song and it's so heartbreaking because there is no ensemble in that version so you have to sit with the harsh melody when Dally makes his choice to face the train head on)

Stay Gold:

After Dally's death we head back to the Curtis house. We don't get a time frame but going off the book it's been a week or two since they've both died. Cherry comes by with Johnny's things from the hospital, she mentions she volunteers there now, and gives Pony Johnny's letter for him. Pony refuses to read it but after Soda has his break down about "we're all we got left" he grabs Johnny's letter and starts to read it for Pony. Getting a line or two in before Pony asks for it, starts to read it himself, and the song begins. Johnny Cade joins us back on stage as he sings to Pony his hope for the world he has to leave behind. And of course, that request to stay gold.

Finale (Tulsa '67):

After reading Johnny's letter Ponyboy begins to write his theme. He finishes a page or two before joining his brothers at the table, he tells them what he writing about and Soda tells him to read it. Pony says it's only a few pages but Darry speaks up, "Can I read it?" he asks. And Pony hands it over, it isn't Ponyboy reading that intro again, but Darry, determined to do better by his brother and reading his work. He and Soda pass the theme to each other, taking turns reading sections aloud while Pony sings. Sings about Tulsa and the gang, of Dally who saw being a greaser as a badge of honor, of Johnny who wanted more for himself and more for Ponyboy who vows that "in his memory I'll stay gold!" The entire cast comes onto the stage as they sing, no longer to each other but to the audience, "stay gold!" It is something that has stuck with me and will stick with me to know that those final lines were no longer characters talking to each other, but talking to the audience right as the show comes to an end.

Anyways this got way longer then I thought but if you want me to ramble more about the show literally just ask I can not stop thinking about it. Might make another post about the differences between the musical and the book.

#the outsiders musical #the outsiders #the outsiders musical spoilers #outsiders musical spoilers #ponyboy curtis #darry curtis #sodapop curtis #steve randle #two bit mathews #dallas winston #johnny cade #ace the greaser

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hayatheauthor · 1 year

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How To Get Away With Murder Part Two: Writing Murder Mysteries

Murder mysteries are possibly one of the most complicated genres in fiction. Unlike other genres, authors need to create a very comprehensive backstory and worldbuilding that seamlessly ties into the present story while also creating intriguing characters that move the plot forward. As an author, you need to weave a complex web of clues, red herrings, and twists that ultimately lead to the big reveal, all while maintaining the integrity of the story.

Writing a good murder mystery is a daunting task, but with the right tools and techniques, you can create a gripping tale that keeps your readers on the edge of their seats. In this blog post, I'll be sharing my personal tips and insights on how to craft a compelling murder mystery that will leave your readers guessing until the very end.

Establish The Rules

Before you jump into your murder mystery it’s important to first set the scene and establish the ‘rules’ for your murder mystery. Your readers need to know what’s at stake here. Who was murdered? What is the most likely reason for their murder? Why is this particular character investigating their murder? You need to set up a clear foundation for your story.

Authors should also attempt to establish some semblance of a ‘stage’ for where the story will take place. If a character was murdered in their hotel room the hotel itself would likely be the ‘stage’ for your book’s murder mystery. This is where the detective will live and uncover clues until the end of the book.

Once you have a clear story and setting, move on to the characters and their role in the murder. Who is the investigative figure? Do they have to face any obstacles or follow certain rules while investigating? A great example of this would be Pip’s legal restrictions in A Good Girl’s Guide To Murder. Her position as a teenager significantly limited her investigative methods.

Plant The Seeds

Foreshadowing is the key to a good murder mystery. You need to start foreshadowing as soon as possible. As a writer, you need to plant subtle clues throughout your narrative that will keep your readers engaged and guessing.

But it's important to strike a balance between too much foreshadowing, which can make the plot predictable, and too little, which can make the conclusion feel like it came out of nowhere. Start foreshadowing early on in your story, and use a mix of subtle hints and more overt clues to keep your readers engaged without giving away the ending. Remember, the best foreshadowing is often invisible until the reader looks back on the story as a whole.

The Repitition Rule

Writers are often advised to repeat foreshadowing at least three times to help readers remember it. While this can be a helpful guideline, it's important to use your own judgment and avoid overdoing it. After all, if you repeat the same clues too often, you risk telegraphing the ending and ruining the suspense.

Instead, aim for a mix of subtle and overt foreshadowing that will keep readers engaged without giving too much away. Remember, the goal is to keep readers guessing until the very end.

Misdirect The Reader

In order to keep readers engaged and invested in the mystery, it's important to misdirect them from time to time. This means leading them down one path only to reveal that it was a dead end, or presenting a red herring that turns out to be unrelated to the actual crime.

There are many ways to accomplish this, from introducing false suspects and motives to using clever misdirection to steer readers away from the truth. One effective technique is to present conflicting evidence that suggests multiple possible solutions, forcing readers to constantly reassess their theories and stay engaged with the story.

However, it's important to avoid overdoing it or making the misdirection too obvious. You want readers to feel challenged and intrigued, not frustrated or misled. Ultimately, the goal is to keep readers guessing until the very end, when all is revealed and the pieces fall into place.

Add Depth To Your Characters

Developing your characters is crucial in murder mysteries. Not only does it make them more interesting and relatable, but it also helps to create a sense of connection and investment in the story. Make sure each character, even minor ones, have a distinct personality and backstory that ties into the plot.

When it comes to suspects, be sure to give each one a clear motive and opportunity to commit the crime. Think about their relationships with the victim and other characters, and how those dynamics could have played a role in the murder. Consider adding red herrings, false leads, and hidden secrets to make the investigation more complex and engaging.

Adding depth to your characters also helps create an emotional connection. This is especially important for the victim, you need to show your readers why they should care about this character’s death.

In A Good Girl’s Guide To Murder everyone’s illtreatment towards Sal’s family made the readers empathetic and had us rooting for Pip. It is important to establish some semblance of this empathy, or any other emotion such as anger, for your victims.

Use The Setting To Your Advantage

In a murder mystery, the setting can play a crucial role in providing clues and red herrings. Think about the location where the murder took place, and how it could provide hints about the killer's identity or motives. Perhaps there's a hidden object or a peculiar feature of the setting that only the killer would know about.

On the other hand, you can also use the setting to throw off the reader's suspicion, by including false clues or misdirections. For example, a character may have a motive to commit the murder in a particular location, but it turns out that they were actually somewhere else at the time. Overall, the setting is a powerful tool that can enhance the suspense and intrigue of a murder mystery, so make sure to use it to your advantage.

In addition to using the setting to provide clues and red herrings, it's also important to use it to create a mood and atmosphere that supports the murder mystery genre. Consider using a dark and moody setting, like a creepy old mansion or a foggy alleyway, to create tension and suspense.

You can also use the setting to create obstacles for your characters to overcome, like a hidden trapdoor. By making the setting a key part of your story, you can enhance the overall experience for your readers and make your murder mystery even more memorable.

Tie Up Loose Ends

Tying up loose ends is an essential part of writing a murder mystery. The reader expects a satisfying conclusion, and that can only happen when all loose ends are resolved. It's important to address any unanswered questions and resolve any plot holes.

Plot holes can be frustrating for readers and can ruin the entire reading experience. As a writer, it's your responsibility to make sure that there are no unresolved issues in your story. If there are any inconsistencies or plot holes, they need to be addressed and resolved.

To ensure that all loose ends are tied up, it's helpful to create a list of all the questions that need to be answered by the end of the story. Go through your manuscript multiple times, checking to make sure that each question is answered and that all loose ends are resolved.

By taking the time to tie up loose ends and address any plot holes, you can create a satisfying conclusion that will leave your readers feeling impressed with your attention to detail.

Practice Makes Perfect

To write a good murder mystery, you need to practice. Writing a successful mystery requires a skill and experience, and you can't expect to get it right the first time. Practice by reading other murder mysteries and taking note of how other authors structure their stories, how they use clues and foreshadowing, and how they misdirect the reader.

When you're writing your own murder mystery, don't be afraid to make mistakes. It's common for writers to encounter plot holes or inconsistencies in their story. The important thing is to recognize these mistakes and fix them as soon as possible. One way to do this is to get feedback from other writers or beta readers.

Remember, the more you practice, the better you'll become. Don't get discouraged if your first attempts aren't perfect. Keep writing, keep learning, and keep honing your craft. Eventually, you'll be able to write a murder mystery that will keep your readers guessing until the very end.

I hope this blog on how to get away with murder and write a murder mystery will help you in your writing journey. Be sure to comment any tips of your own to help your fellow authors prosper, and follow my blog for new blog updates every Monday and Thursday.

Looking For More Writing Tips And Tricks?

Are you an author looking for writing tips and tricks to better your manuscript? Or do you want to learn about how to get a literary agent, get published and properly market your book? Consider checking out the rest of Haya’s book blog where I post writing and marketing tools for authors every Monday and Thursday

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bulbagarden · 8 months

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Opinion: Scarlet and Violet are Pokémon's Queerest Games Yet (Bulbanews)

Hi it's Lisia here!! The following is an opinion piece from one of our staff members, Torchic W. Pip!! Blanc and I both loved this and like... we had to share it here LOL.

Pokémon was my queer awakening. I had silly little crushes on male and female characters alike, and I resonated with many of the designs of the series’s more gender nonconforming designs. Pokémon has always had a wink and a nod to queerness: Jessie and James’s genderbending antics, Beauty Nova in X and Y, Blanche from Pokémon GO… the list goes on. But with Scarlet and Violet, queerness shines bright as celestial stars.

“But wait!” you might say. “Scarlet and Violet has no canonical gay or trans characters! How can this thesis make sense?” Well, queer representation need not be explicit to be impactful. Sometimes, the stories queer people resonate with most are told through metaphor, from the misfits in Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to X-Men to Luca and Gwen Stacy. The roots of this trace back to a history of censorship. LGBTQ+ stories have been historically censored, such as with the Hays Code. Queer people have long been unable to see stories with explicitly queer characters, so they instead turned to metaphors and symbolism. Gender nonconformity is also nothing new to the scene of video games. Metroid, Legend of Zelda, Final Fantasy, and Guilty Gear are just some of the games that play with our expectations of gender. It’s also nothing new to Pokémon. East Asian media tends to depict transness and gender nonconformity differently from the West, but for more on that, I'll direct you to this video.

Even before the release of Scarlet and Violet, gender nonconformity shined through. Take a character like Grusha, for example, who many mistook for a girl when he was first introduced. It goes a little deeper than that, though. “Grusha” is Russian for “pear”, but it’s also a diminutive for the name “Agrafena”... a female Russian name. Whether or not it was intentional, it does add an extra layer of nonconformity to Grusha. Another character with some queercoded elements is Iono: Her color palette evokes the colours of the trans flag, and her Magnemite headpieces evoke an explicitly genderless Pokémon. Baggy clothes are common among many transgender people. Her friend Bellibolt is a frog, and many frogs in real life can change their sex. In Japanese, she speaks with a Bokukko speech pattern (a girl using the masculine “boku”), which is often used for plucky characters, but also nonconforming characters. All of Iono’s names across translations evoke themes of questions. On top of all that… well, the Vtubing scene is, from personal experience, very queer. All of my friends who watch VTubers are queer in some way. More seriously, creating a persona where you can let your true self shine in a way that regular society won't allow you to... that's pretty queer.

With the release of the games, we’ve seen a wide array of characters—Rika, Saguaro, Penny, and all of the leaders of Team Star, among others—showcase a wide range of gender expressions, either in their appearances, their personalities, or their hobbies. And all of these characters are seen as heroes, as role models.

As with games before, there are two characters with queer subtext in their relationship. Hassel and Brassius have been seen by many as being in a gay relationship, bonding over a love of art, supporting each other in dark times, and giving each other pet names. Even if it's not outright stated that they're in a romantic relationship, their care for each other is a beautiful thing. Many gay coded relationships are often of younger men or women, and while these relationships are important, it's also important for older gay couples to receive some of the spotlight. After all, queer people have always existed, and it's important to remember our past and honor those who came before us, who helped paved the path to acceptance.

For the first time in a mainline game, the player character can choose any clothes, hair style, and so on regardless of gender. While the player can still only choose between being referred to by masculine or feminine terms, this is a step in the right direction, and it opens the door for many opportunities never seen before. Boys can be feminine, girls can be masculine, and both can be anywhere in between. The world of gender expression is as big as the open world of Paldea.

But back to Team Star. The whole Team Star path is one big, queer metaphor. Think about it: kids are bullied for how they dress or act, these misfits band together and retaliate against their bullies, finding a sort of family in each other, villains who turn out to be just the opposite… It’s a story that, in some way or form, can resonate with many kids who have, sadly, dealt with homophobia or transphobia in school. The path is a story about righting what’s wrong, about making the world a more accepting place.

Scarlet and Violet is a game about shining bright in the sky with other stars, about being your true self. Its themes are deeply resonant with the queer experience. At the end of the Team Star path, you battle Penny, whose ace Pokémon is trans flag-coloured Sylveon, and as she Terastilizes her partner, she says, “Shine bright like the starry sky and become who you really want to be!” So shine bright, trainers, and be your true self.

Oh, and of course, Quaquaval is the queer icon of all time.

[Torchic W. Pip is a Bulbanews writer with a focus on music, merchandise, and spin-off games. They're also a fanfiction author and moderator of the Writer's Workshop subforum. Outside of writing, Torchic is studying music theory and linguistics, and his favorite games are X/Y and Omega Ruby/Alpha Sapphire.]

#pokemon #bulbagarden #bulbanews #queer #lgbt #pride

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tartsinarat · 1 month

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Pip: “…I know you will never think so, but I have always hoped that in another life, you had ran away with me that night.”

Hunter: “…”

Pip: “We could have actually been finally free from this gilded birdcage.”

So I’ve never actually posted anything deeper into how Hunter and Pip think about each other/ their dynamic other than silly sibling dynamic but it’s actually a lot more interesting than that.

Pip and Hunter actually have a complicated relationship that somewhat is like funhouse mirror on what Philip and Caleb may have been like as they both flip flop between the two roles but ironically Hunter predominantly takes Philip’s role while Pip takes Caleb’s. Which uh caused a lot of disagreements.

In the au canon, they see themselves as actually being siblings rather than cousins because the fake story that Belos made is a lot different from the og canon of the show.

So rather than being Belos’s nephews like how Hunter is in the show, instead they are his actual children that he had with a human when he supposedly visited the human realm. This is what Hunter believes is the reason why he has no magic but pointed ears and why Pip thinks he has magic but round ears.

The story that Belos created in order to explain why their mum mysteriously missing is that a group of wild witches killed her and the rest of their family. It’s also the fake explanation for how both Pip and Belos got cursed.

This also adds credence to why Belos hates wild witches to the public and why the day of unity is so important because they’ve all been told it’s going to properly unite the human realm and the demon realm.

I also find it much more interesting that instead of Hunter just knowing that his “family” died in a mysterious way like in the show canon that instead Belos actually created an extremely detailed false family history so those two wouldn’t go snooping around searching for any missing details

it makes it even more fucked up when these two later learn that everything was a lie because to further solidify the illusion Belos even implanted false memories so uh these definitely two struggle with the consequences of figuring that out.

But yeah properly onto Pip and Hunter, both of them were basically inseparable as little kids but ended up drifting apart because Hunter had started working as the Golden guard and Pip was too young to help out (and also Belos didn’t want to have to go through the long and tedious process of cloning himself again) so Pip was often left behind bored and alone.

This boredom has consequences because when exploring the castle Pip found out about something he really shouldn’t have…He inadvertently ended meeting the collector who was also really bored and wanted to play with someone who’s not old and boring like Belos. Uh safe to say Pip straight up almost died when Belos walked in on him and the collector chatting about titans.

Hunter also ended up eventually getting involved to try and protect Pip but ended up getting that wound across his cheek. They obviously both survived but they were both punished by not being allowed to use healing magic on their wounds and to be locked in their rooms for the foreseeable future.

Pip sneaks out and attempts to convince Hunter to escape the castle and run away because it’s not the first time they’ve been almost killed for a mistake but Hunter believes that they had both deserved it for disobeying authority and refuses to come with Pip.

Pip just ends up escaping by sneaking on to an airship but almost gets caught by Belos but just escapes in the nick of time with just a scratch across his thigh. Luckily the airship was being piloted Lilith who had no idea that there was a stowaway onboard as she was too busy planing on how to finally convince Eda to join the emperor’s coven.

Oh yeah Eda straight up slams the door in Lilith’s face and tells Hooty to eat any intruders, Pip sneaks out of the airship as it’s about to leave and while trying to get a grasp of his surroundings, Hooty sees him and its on sight. Eda saves him and ends up with a new roommate along side King and Hooty and patches him up because she felt bad for the little guy.

I’ll talk about Hunter and Pip’s familial relationship in the modern times in another post as this one got really long TwT

But yeah that’s the origin to this post of small Pip and why him and Hunter have bad blood until they met again like 7 years later.

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firewizahd · 9 months

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my friend accidentally used my other friend’s feint on a 0-pip wand cast, and she got so angry that he ended up writing her a formal apology, which I will transcribe below:

Subject: Sincere Apology for My Mistake in Battle

Dear [REDACTED],

I hope this message finds you in good health. I want to extend my heartfelt apologies for the mistake I made during our recent important battle. I deeply regret using a 0 pip spell on your feint, which undoubtedly had a negative impact on our overall strategy.

I understand the significance of well-coordinated moves and the impact they have on the outcome of battles. My action not only compromised our plan but also affected the trust and teamwork we have developed over time. I genuinely apologize for my lapse in judgment and any frustration or disappointment it may have caused.

Please know that I am committed to learning from this experience and ensuring that such a mistake does not happen again in the future. I value our partnership and the camaraderie we share, and I am determined to work harder to uphold our battle standards.

Once again, I am truly sorry for my actions and any adverse consequences they had on our recent battle. I hope we can move forward and continue fighting side by side with renewed determination and unity.

Sincerely,

[REDACTED]

#I just about howled #when i saw that #this is the only acceptable response for such a transgression tbh #wizard101 #w101 #wiz101 #wizzy101 #wizzy fandom

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popsicle-stick · 1 year

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I don't know anything about England but I'm interested in how the characters' locations inform their characters like Seward's. I'd like to know more about the implications of being from Purfleet/Essex for example (Though iirc Stoker immigrated from Dublin well into adulthood so I don't know how well he knew all the cities.)

there's so much to be said! i really don't think that stoker meant much intentionally, but the placement of the asylum in purfleet specifically is interesting.

long post so i'm cutting this!

the asylum at purfleet, essex, is an example of the common 19th-early 20th century phenomenon of establishing psychiactric hospitals in the rural counties surrounding london - simultaneously serving as a 'tranquil' location away from the city, while also serving the dubious, cruel purpose of squirelling away would-be patients into residences away from the city - out of society, out of sight, out of mind.

in terms of jack seward himself, purfleet is a kind of an in-between, nothing place - things and people pass through, not much stays. (there's a reason why whitby is remembered as 'the dracula place', and not purfleet.) it's quite literally on the edge of london - of society - and in that scene where jack's looking despondently towards the sun setting west over london, his own isolation becomes palpable - from society and from the world as a whole. the endless, transient, liminal feel of the essex saltmarshes just....gives the vibe. this was a scene that felt particularly gothic to me - jack is the custodian of his very own haunted house, here, in all its bleak, isolated glory.

It was a shock to me to turn from the wonderful smoky beauty of a sunset over London, with its lurid lights and inky shadows and all the marvellous tints that come on foul clouds even as on foul water, and to realise all the grim sternness of my own cold stone building, with its wealth of breathing misery, and my own desolate heart to endure it all.

this is an fascinating parallel with the count's situation in transylvania, which is NOT the topic du jour here so i'll stop before i ramble but compelling nonetheless! like the count, though, he's a liminal figure - in london, but not quite in london. in the group, but not in the group. alive, but not really living. wide awake in the witching hour, unsure how to re-integrate with society.

it's also worth noting that the opening of dickens' great expectations has pip in his childhood home on the kent marshes - which would pretty much be the opposite bank of the thames from purfleet. in great expectations, pip's village serves a similar role - the quiet, bleak, nowhere-place directly placed against the bustling cosmopolis of london.

in terms of other characters and locations, i've written a bit before about jonathan (and mina possibly) hailing from exeter, devon, in the south west of england - which is much further from london.

jonathan and mina, in terms of the group dynamics, are outsiders: they're very much lower middle class, hyper-aware of the importance of money and societal etiquette as a means for survival and social betterment. this is a personal hc of mine, but i like to think of jonathan as having the long supressed remnants of a devon accent. south west accents are often the subject of a lot of ridicule and mockery in the UK (akin to a southern US accent) and hiding that regionalism, in both the 1890s and today's britain, would be a means of survival and progress for him - i think the fact that he's always given a standard home counties RP accent in adaptations cuts out a major aspect of his character. he's a devon boy!

in contrast to all this, lucy's hampstead residence shows her affluence. it, too, at risk of breaking my social isolation metaphor, was on the edge of london at the time - but was known more as a wealthy suburb with huge areas of greenery at hampstead heath and highgate. there's something to be said, though, about a place like highgate cemetery - a liminal place between the dead and the living, between city and country, haunted at night by a vampire - and the same could be said for purfleet.

arthur is hard to pin down - for the life of me i CANNOT work out where 'ring' is supposed to be - at first i thought it might be a shortening for ringwood, hampshire, which could work! but i just don't know. his character does scream privileged southern/home counties though, and if anyone has any followups on 'ring' and its wherabouts i would LOVE to know because this has been bugging me for ages. lmao

tl;dr, psychology and sociology as informed by place is SO fucking fascinating to me like it just. it affects so much. from the liminality of certain places lending themselves to the supernatural, to characters being mirrored by their surroundings and vice versa, to the social implications of where you call home. it's just!!! interesting!!

#cw ableism #dracula #dracula daily #this is my disorganised magnum opus i wrote so much and deleted half bc it goes off-topic but there's so much.....#i grew up near the fringes of london myself and there's a certain transience to that kind of hinterland which i think you get w/ any city #my own personal hc for jack seward is that he was brought up in an isolated seaside town (harwich‚ maybe?) and went to university in london #before continuing his education in amsterdam #also i like that harwich has a DIRECT ship route to the netherlands....thinking.....thoughts..#while writing this i was doing some research and now i have many seward hometown thoughts god.#[points to a puddle in a saltmarsh] this is jack seward. to me

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talknerdytome18 · 14 days

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okay so... the clip of someone throwing papers?? 😖😖😖😖 its gotta be sal right! what are your theories in general about the series? What are yoh most excited for?

(talking about the agggtm teaser trailer thing)

Yep, it's definitely Sal. Looks like it's the scene when the police are questioning him about Andie after her disappearance. My poor boy seems so frustrated 😭 wonder why he threw the papers cause that didn't happen in the book???

I'm honestly really excited to see Holly's cameo in the show! I really love how involved she was with the production, so I'm really excited to see her cameo!

I'm also really excited to see Connor Reynolds 😭 I just really adore him so much and can't wait to see him on screen.

For theories, I feel like someone (Elliot) is gonna expose the hit and run Naomi was involved with. I feel like he'll do that so Pip stops investigating. Also, the angst between Cara and Pip because Cara might initially think that Pip exposed Naomi since she only found it out because of the investigation 😭

I also feel like that there will be more queer characters in the show. We only have Cara and Steph in the original books, so it would be lovely to see more queer characters. I'd personally love Steph (Cara's gf) to be introduced early on because I love her, but I'm also up for Lauren x Cara to be canon too!

I'd also love Zach x Connor because I just find it VERY INTERESTING that they'd add Zach into the show but not Ant. If you're cutting anyone from the book, then you'd cut Zach since he's not that important. I'm probably just looking too deep into it but I wanna be delusional.

That's all for now. Thanks for asking!

#agggtm #a good girl's guide to murder #connor reynolds #zach chen #cara ward #ravi singh #pippa fitz amobi #lauren gibson #becca bell #andie bell #sal singh #naomi ward #agggtm cast #agggtm tv show #agggtm bbc #holly jackson #good girl bad blood #as good as dead #pipravi

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starsurface · 3 months

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hello again! i have nightwolf on the brain again, so could i ask for him with a toddler regressor who asks to play with his spirit animals? (no im not asking this just for Kiba... or maybe.. she's my favorite out of all of his animals but still >.<) 🔮

Hi!!! I like Nightwolf's animals (I love animals in general)!!! I got the bear's and eagle's names from a quick online search. And I only know that Kiba's a girl, I don't know about the other two but I made them girls too. (Tell me if I'm incorrect!!)

Although, I did kinda throw the whole 'spirit' concept away, ish? Like, they can eat animal snacks, but Nightwolf still has to summon them, you know?

Also I'm so sorry but I realized these are so much more focused on the animals than Nightwolf himself!!! :(

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

CG Nightwolf w/ Toddler Regressor That Plays With His Spirit Animals Hcs

🐺 Nightwolf’s spirit animals are important to him, Komo (bear), Hana (eagle), and Kiba (wolf)

🐺 But you are also very important to him

🐺 He actually really likes you spending time with his animals!! Both when your big and when your little

🐺 But does have to summon his spirit animals so you have to ask to play with them :(

🐺 Although he’s rarely ever said no!! Maybe once or twice, but he probably had good reasons, like it was bath time, or he didn’t want Kiba splashing in mud . . . again

🐺 However, his animals adore you!!

🐺 They get playtime, and head scratchies, and they can go onto the bed-

🐺 You might get a small scolding for letting Komo onto the bed though, she’s too big for it!!

🐺 Komo and Hana like playing with you, but Kiba’s the main one that tries to steal your attention

🐺 Hana has to be specific where she lands and how gently she eats from your hand, especially when your tiny

🐺 And Komo’s very big!! Great fo snuggles, although she does have to watch her claws :(

🐺 Kiba though? Perfect size!! :D

🐺 She can play ball, do tricks, sit on your lap, be used as a pillow

🐺 Nightwolf finds it funny when you try to bribe any of them for cuddle time, leaving a small trail of their favorite snacks to the couch so you can steal them for yourself

🐺 He might tell you that you can’t overfeed them though, they’re still his kombat animals :\

🐺 That doesn’t stop you though, and the animals get pretty huffy when Nightwolf tries to call you out

🐺 A very fun activity was jumping outside in the rain with Kiba

🐺 You got your little rainboots on, and a coat, and jumped into some muddy puddles!! :D

🐺 . . . Although even spirit animals can get dirty, and now Nightwolf has to clean you both off 😮‍💨

🐺 Komo really likes snuggle time

🐺 She’s very big and furry, a great cuddle partner

🐺 Plus she gets to sit on the couch and watch funny cartoons >:3

🐺 Sometimes she’ll lay on top of you, and do an animal like laugh when you whine that she’s too heavy >:(

🐺 ^ Don’t worry, Nightwolf saves you . . . Until it happens again

🐺 Hana will pip (eagle chirp?) with you, sitting on your lap most times because she doesn’t want her claws to grip you wrong

🐺 Nightwolf will usually have her on his arm so you can pet her, it’s safer that way

🐺 More about Kiba because we love Kiba in this house (and she was specifically requested <3)-

🐺 She’ll bring you things!! Sticks she wants youtube throw, your stuffie when you look upset, a pair of shoes when you're looking outside

🐺 Now, the shoes are rarely ever matching, but the thought is what counts <3

🐺 She takes you on walks, you don’t take her on walks (Nightwolf takes you both on walks, but whatever)

🐺 She’ll whine when you tug on her fur by accident, but Nightwolf will teach you that you can’t pull her fur, soft pats, love

🐺 She doesn’t mind being used as a pillow or a stuffie while your watching your show, she’ll probably take a nap or stare at the colorful screen

🐺 She’ll sit at your tea party too, put a tiara on her and pour her tea, she can’t drink it, but if you keep feeding her little snacks she’ll stay

🐺 Nightwolf totally doesn’t get jealous by how much you wanna cuddle her instead of him, why would he?

🐺 . . . . But he is your Dada, not Kiba, you should remember that every once in a while and come cuddle him instead 🙄 <3

🐺 No but seriously, he does love seeing you hang out and interact with his little friends

🐺 He will join your cuddle sessions though, you can’t get rid of him that easily, darling

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Did you know in Mortal Kombat Defenders of the Realm, Kiba is an actual wolf? And her and Nightwolf combine to give him his Shamon powers? :D (Her relationship with Styker is ridiculous and I love it)

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mothman-can-write · 4 months

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hi !!! i saw u said you were open for prompts, i mean this is kinda less of a prompt really, but like i loved that blackhill mission transcript thing you did a while ago and would be really cool to see some more stuff in the same vein ig ! but also maybe something like a kinda blackhill first meeting kinda thing idk !! i just love your work tho ! you really have the ability to make me feel all the emotions

OOOOO i just thought of this whilst writing this but maybe something like with clint teasing nat ab having like feelings for maria or something ?? idk i just love ur writing ! sorry these are kinda shitty hahah

NGL I took this prompt and mangled it in my hands. I heard first meeting and my brain was immediately like well that could go seventeen thousand different ways, so I sorta mashed in Clint's teasing to go along with it and made it a little more suggestive than outright shippy. Realistically, I think if Natasha is only meeting Maria for the first time, she's probably still in a place where she's not totally open to such self indulgent things as having a crush

Also, this isn't a mission transcript but I'd love to do more of them that one was really fun! I just don't really have any good ideas for the sort of things they'd have to talk about in the field besides dying haha

ANYWAY enough rambling, though you're all familiar with my inability to shut up these days. ~3k under the cut of Clint being a ballache and nat being sceptical but gay

The only person that doesn’t treat Natasha like she’s a project – or a live wire – is Clint. He’d had his fair share of looking at her with those careful eyes, something behind them that made her teeth itch in her gums like some trained dog. He doesn’t do that so much anymore, not unless she’s in a particular state and doing a very bad job at hiding it. She likes him, she thinks. He might be one of the first people in her entire life that she can truly say she likes.

Naturally, she finds herself in his quarters more often than her own. She lays on his bed as he works on something probably explosive enough to kill them both if he sneezes, and she ignores the pip of her emails as she braids a small strip of hair under her ear. She’s bored, if she’s honest, but she doesn’t want to waste her first free morning of the past fortnight on something so trivial as emails. Or helping Clint.

“You not gonna answer her?” he says without looking up from his work. He holds it close to his face, something far too small in his tweezers.

Natasha’s fingers pause in untangling her braid. “How do you know who it is?”

He still doesn’t turn in his seat, matter of fact when he speaks. “You have a different tone for Hill.”

“How did you figure that out?” She tries not to scowl at him, but she still isn’t used to feeling so see-through. Quite frankly, she’d like to be as opaque as possible, but she seems to have grown rather attached to someone with x-ray vision.

Clint puts his miniature contraption down and turns to her at last. She’s not fond of the smile on his face as he leans over the back of his chair. “You’re not the only spy on the ship. Also, you weren’t trying very hard to hide it.”

“Her emails are usually more important,” Natasha argues, not quite sure why she feels the need to defend herself on it.

Clint grins ever wider. “I never asked why. I just thought you had a massive crush on her.”

Natasha scowls fully this time. “I’ve never met her.”

He shrugs. “I don’t know what’s in those emails.”

“Shut up.”

She reaches for her phone anyway and pointedly ignores the way Clint watches her. The email is much the same as they always are, telling her about meetings and progress and such. She’s overtly professional in every one, but now that she’s thinking about it, Natasha likes the words she uses – just slightly like she enjoyed reading dictionaries as a child. Very, very rarely, Maria will let something slip in her emails that is almost like humour, and Natasha doesn’t tell Clint that she actually does enjoy receiving emails from her just for the fact that she feels a little special when that happens. She’s heard the rumours; she knows not to expect giggles and grins when it comes to the Assistant Director.

In the end, she doesn’t bother to respond to the email anyway and Clint has already turned back to his work. “Not in the mood to sext her back?”

She scowls at the back of his head. “It sounds like Laura needs to watch her back.”

“Oh, god,” he laughs. “Gross. Absolutely not. Not my type.”

“What makes you think she’s mine?”

“You need someone to match your weirdness.”

Natasha wishes she had something to throw at him. She won’t admit that she intrigues her in small ways. She doubts she’s any different from every other CEO and government lead in the world, but some small part of her feels thankful to her faceless emails. She could’ve easily overridden Clint’s choice, could’ve had her put down before she could even think to beg for forgiveness. But she’d given her a chance, and she’d kept in contact despite her supposed overbooked schedule every day since. Maria held her life in her hands at one point, and she’d given her another shot at it.

Despite everything, Natasha still doesn’t sleep well. Or, rather, because of everything, she supposes. One good month doesn’t erase a lifetime of bad – and she’s really a little hesitant to say that this month has even been good in many senses of the word. She wonders if the nights will ever get easier on her with time, or if she’s stuck with these hours of restlessness and sweat for the rest of her life. It’s not a nice thing to think about, and it doesn’t really do all that much to distract her from the shadows that still play behind her eyelids or the way the shapes of the room still seem to swim around the edges. So, she swings her legs over the side of her bed and scrubs at her face with her hands. She can appreciate, at the very least, that she isn’t handcuffed to her bed here. Somehow, that had been a hard thing to get used to. She still sleeps with one arm by the headboard.

There aren't many things to do at this hour. Clint has told her countless times that she’s perfectly welcome to pester him at any time of the night if it would make her feel even minutely better. He says he understands, and she believes him enough from the way his past lines his own face, but it doesn’t make it any easier to put into practice.

She doesn’t have a plan as she steps out into the corridors. She dresses like she’s going to the gym on the off chance that she might be able to sneak into it and punch something until she’s sweaty for reasons more tangible. She wishes the firing range was usable at this hour, but she’s sure that’s much less subtle. Still, there are some nightmares you can only really feel better by shooting at. Maybe she’ll bat her eyelashes into an hour or so at the targets tomorrow.

She passes the odd agent as she trails around the corridors and considers that the ship never really sleeps entirely. There’s always someone on the night shift, always someone pottering around with something. She thinks it would be nice to work when it’s so quiet. Maybe she should ask about changing her hours. It might be a little soon.

The gym isn’t so far from her quarters, and by the time she reaches it her shirt still feels sticky at her back and her stomach still feels like it’s alive in her ribcage. Her hopes are low enough to limbo as she presses her hand to the door, and she could almost sigh with relief when the door opens easily. She’s not against breaking in, but she likes to think she’s been doing a pretty good job of building a better reputation lately. Maybe not socially, but Maria’s emails haven’t managed to sound short lately – not since the last time she’d bypassed what she maintains was a criminally simple encryption on one of Clint’s jobs.

The gym is utterly silent at this time of the morning, which is entirely unsurprising. She doubts anyone else sensible gets out of bed for another hour or two, let alone starts their training regime. Generally, agents are allowed the privilege of breakfast before they’re worked to the bone. Natasha’s never been a fan of food so early in the morning.

She doesn’t really know when she fell out of the habit of scanning each room on this ship like someone will be waiting to haul her out of it, and she blames it firmly on her lack of sleep and nightmare slurred thoughts when she doesn’t notice the other body in the gym until it’s too late.

“I did wonder,” someone says, and Natasha’s attention snaps to one of the benches on the far side, half covered from the entrance.

It takes Natasha an almost embarrassingly drawn out moment to place her features, and she’s sure she only half succeeds in hiding her surprise into an intrigued eyebrow. The Assistant Director didn’t really strike her as the type to be in the gym when everyone is supposed to be sleeping.

“Wonder what?” she asks instead of every other question that gnaws at her head. She stays firmly planted in the middle of the room.

“Who would come in at this time.”

Oh. She’s not wondering about Natasha. She doesn’t really know what that feels a mote disappointing. She hates it when Clint asks how she’s sleeping. Maybe she just doesn’t like lying to him.

“I thought it would be empty.”

Maria places her water bottle beside her on the bench and makes absolutely no move to stand up yet. Somehow, Natasha finds it unnerving, even if she’s taller here. “It usually is,” she says simply.

Her eyes bore into her in a way that makes the back of her neck crawl. Something about her says that she’s calculating, that she’s looking at Natasha and breaking her down into little bite sized pieces. Natasha has never liked being dissected. Maria’s eyes are very blue.

“Do you usually spend your mornings here?” she asks, if only to stop Maria from burning holes into her skull and reading her thoughts directly.

It works, in the way that her gaze flicks away for the briefest moment before pinning her again in that same cool tone. “I guess you could call this morning.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

Maria’s eyes soften ever so slightly around the corners, and Natasha would almost call it a squint. “I’ve made a bit of a habit at this point, yes.”

She almost seems reluctant to admit it, and Natasha can’t help the way she wants to pick this woman apart. She has always liked puzzles, and people are just some of the more complex the world has to offer. She thinks she understands the rumours a little more now, even through this uncanny meeting. She wonders if Maria feels her own searching gaze as intently.

Maria stands at last, and Natasha had almost forgotten how tall she is. She thinks she preferred it when she was sitting. “Don’t let me stop you,” she says, and Natasha is silently thankful for the way that answers her question. Again, not that she wouldn’t break the rules. It’s just much harder to make an excuse when the Assistant Director is the one who catches you.

“I would’ve expected the AD to send me back to my quarters,” she notes, as forward as ever when it gets her information. She’ll admit this woman seems to be intriguing. She’s curious as to just why she’s indulging her so far.

Maria’s expressions are all very small, mere suggestions of emotions that only make Natasha want to pick her apart. “That would make me more of a hypocrite than I already am,” she says simply, almost smiling. “Are you getting on okay?” she asks instead , and her eyes are on her like she’s deciphering her again. She’s closer now, making direct eye contact, and Natasha holds it like a game. “Besides the obvious, of course.”

Natasha tries not to scowl. God, does she hate when people pretend like they know her. “What’s the obvious?”

Maria raises one eyebrow ever so slightly, her expression caught somewhere to amusement. “Did the Red Room have you in the routine of training at four in the morning?”

“Sometimes.” They both know that’s not the reason that she’s here, as much as Natasha wishes Maria didn’t.

Her eyes are almost soft. Almost like she truly cares about her. Natasha doesn’t like to let herself believe the sort of things that might cost her later. “Half of the people on this ship struggle with it, Romanoff,” she says, nearly gentle in the silence around them. “You don’t have to be ashamed of it.”

She can almost imagine her setting a heavy hand on her shoulder as she says it, though Maria remains in her own space. She’s still slightly too close for what Natasha is used to however, and it’s the first time she realises the darkness under her eyes. Her face is lined, something bone deep that she doubts ever goes away. It lends her a certain sort of…imperfection that makes her seem a whole lot more human. For everything she’s heard, though she knows to take gossip with a healthy grain of salt, she could almost imagine Hill to be some sort of robot, some living excel sheet.

Standing in front of her, she sort of just looks like a woman who could do with some sleep. She looks like a woman who has spent the last who-knows-how-many hours beating out her own past the same way Natasha intends to. She won’t call it affection. It doesn’t mean Natasha likes the way she looks straight through her any more.

“You have any tips?” she says, aiming for something playful. She really, really just wants her to stop looking at her like she can figure her out right here in the middle of the room. Maybe if she seems better than she is, she’ll leave her alone. She’d rather her conduct a genuine vivisection out on the boxing ring floor if she’s going to continue to examine her.

She’s certain Maria almost smiles at that, a tug at the corner of her lips that is almost sad, almost conspirational. She shrugs ever so slightly. “Shooting things usually helps.”

Natasha tries not to scowl like a child. As if she wouldn’t be there right now if she could get away with it. “I’m on supervised arms training.”

This time, Maria does smile, though Natasha thinks she’d have missed it if she blinked. “Not from tomorrow,” she says plainly, and Natasha can only watch her walk away without another word.

The door closes behind her, and Natasha lets herself furrow her eyebrows as deeply as she likes. She is overtly aware that she is not being let off of supervised training tomorrow. She’s aware that she has been seen as a weapon and an explosive since the moment Clint forgot that he was meant to shoot her. Somehow, she doesn’t think that Maria is one to tease.

It makes it very hard to punch things as effectively as she’d like to when she can only think after Maria. She wonders what keeps her up at night. She wonders what else she does to get rid of the shadows. She wonders why on earth she would let her off of the hook so early. For all they know, Natasha might decide to defect back. She might’ve been biding her time until she could get a hand on one of those guns outside of the range. She’d never even dream of it, of course. She’d rather be supervised for every split second a gun is in her hands for the rest of her life than have to go back to her life before. She wonders just how deep Maria managed to dig. She wonders if she really is all that transparent after all.

She finds herself in Clint’s quarters again as thoughtlessly as breathing. Every spare minute in her schedule that lines up with his, she’ll spend hiding from the rest of the world. This time, she’s sitting in his chair, her knees resting against the edge of his desk so that she can spin it slightly from side to side. Clint is behind her in his bunk, his arms tucked up behind his head and his eyes closed. It’s only 2pm. Natasha wishes she could have a nap too.

“Is she always like that?” she says on a whim, her thoughts still stuck on tired eyes and snap decisions.

“Like what?” Clint asks, completely brushing over her lack of context.

“So…intense.”

“Ah, we’re back on Hill. Yes.” He falls silent again, and Natasha listens to his breath. “Hold on.” His eyes open and his head turns on his pillow to face her. “Did you meet her? When?”

“This morning.”

“You were at the range this morning.”

“Before that.”

“You were asleep before that.” She doesn’t answer, and that tells him everything in as little effort as possible. “Natasha.”

She doesn’t meet his eye. “It’s better than moping.”

“You don’t need to mope. You can come wake me up.”

“But then you don’t sleep.”

“Tasha, do you really think I’m sleeping well either half the time?”

She stays silent again, staring intently at the dimples Clint’s chair has made in the carpet.

“How did you even find her?” he asks eventually, giving up the argument for the countless time. “She’s practically booked to the minute.”

“She was in the gym when I got there.”

“I’m going to skip over the fact that you’d rather punch something until you bleed than come and bug me. Was it worth it? Was she all sweaty and hot? Did you two finally canoodle in person?”

She doesn’t dignify his jokes with a response, her thoughts plain in her expression. “I don’t think she sleeps well either. She looked tired.”

Clint grins a little. “You paying attention to her face?”

Natasha scowls at him. “It’s normal to look someone in the eye.”

“Mhm…” He retucks his arms under his head, settling back against his pillow. “It’s for sure normal to think about them all morning.”

“She took me off of probation,” she says, almost in a rush, like maybe this will change the subject – maybe a little bit like she’s admitting something.

“Oh you definitely have a crush on her. It’s like she’s trying to get in your pants. Remind me never to read your emails.”

Natasha only squints at him, wishing once again that she had something appropriate to throw. The urge distracts her enough that she never does reject the notion. And when she finds herself imagining Maria’s secret little smile in those few and far casual emails, she decides that Clint doesn’t need to know. She’s not been given many chances in her life, and she thinks she could make space in her life for two instead of one. She wonders if Maria would ever want a gym buddy on long nights and promptly decides not to think any deeper into it.

#words #tumblr exclusive #prompts #blackhill #natasha romanoff #maria hill #clint barton

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