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mamayan · 8 months

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You up? Give us some delicious yandere stuff 🙏 let's say... Fae King yandere and changeling darling 😏✨

This turned into a full fic :3 ~★ In honor of some monster fucking!

Yandere! Dark Fae King x Darling! Changeling

tw: NSFW • Obsessive/Possessive Themes • Non-Human Morality • Kidnapping • afab Reader • Dubcon • Oral (F) • Grooming (reader is of consenting adult age) • Forced Mating • Imprisonment • Violence (not toward reader) • Implied Murder • Rough Sex • Praise • Overstimulation • Dumbification • Belly Bulge • Size Kink

Part Two: Here

“…hic…sniff…”

Dark eyes glanced into the cool night, curious as to what creature was disturbing his evening.

“…hic…” it came again, much to his chagrin.

The still lake reflected the full moon like a mirror. To his left, not too far off, he honed in on the disturber. Something small and curled up. Shaking. The oddity enough to catch his full attention as he stood silently. The night his home and prison as he swiftly left in a puff of smoke over to the location of his intruder.

You.

His first instinct to end your miserable life, a human somehow entering his domain and crossing his barriers, but upon a closer look… he realized you were of his own kind.

A changeling at that. An abandoned fae left to die in the hands of mortals. Few if any live to maturity like this, but your short human stature led him to believe your growth was surely stunted due to neglect. Young fae needed abundant love and care in their infancy, the first 100 years of life incredibly crucial for their development. Least they end up like him and his kingdom. You were even younger than full maturity, though your physical body had completed it’s growth, your magic was weak and juvenile.

You were making odd noises which drew his curiosity, moving closer to your form, face buried in your lap as you hunched over your drawn up legs. Your feet were bare as the edges of the water lapped at them. Clothing sparse and tattered, rags unfit for even a human, let alone a Fae nearing maturity.

“Noisy little thing,” he hums aloud, startling you as you jolt and nearly throw yourself into the water. Your neck snaps up, pretty face swollen and blotchy from tears looking up and up until you saw a creature looming over you.

Your scream is cut off by a clawed dark hand, slapping over your mouth and muffling the cry as you try to jerk away in fear and panic. He watches in mild amusement, snickering as you realize your struggle is futile and efforts dying down. “Scream if you like, but none other than I will hear it out here.” He assures ominously, thin onyx colored lips pulling back to bare his razor sharp canines and pearly teeth at you. His grin savage and delighted in your terror.

He watches curiously as your wide doe eyes well up with tears, the crystalline droplets spilling up and over your cheeks, soft lips quivering beneath his palm. You reminded him of an animal imploring their predator for mercy by revealing their underbelly. There was a word for it…

Cute. His mind conjured at last. He found you cute, a changeling bold enough to intrude into the kingdom of the corrupted. You hadn’t even dropped the mirage covering you, old magic from your biological family still covering your natural appearance to mimic the human you parasitized off the life of.

“Why do you cry little one?” He asks softly, attempting not to terrify you further and avoid his questions.

You hesitate, but his molten gold eyes seem to melt through your defenses despite his dangerous and beautiful appearance. “I’m wrong,” you sniffle, grateful when he removes his enormous hand off your face, the sharp claws tipped in gold frightening against your soft breakable skin. “All wrong… and I don’t know what to do.” You curl back up around yourself, as if he too will cast judgement upon you.

He awkwardly mimics your stance, curiosity blazing as watches you in fascination. You find the way his monstrously large form contorts to sit like you somewhat baffling and amusing, less frightened now that he doesn’t seem to wish you harm.

“How are you wrong then?” He pries further, cupping his defined jaw and leaning into his hand as he observes.

“I’m not…I’m not human—I’m a—a—,” you stumble, unsure if this night is even real anymore. The shock so great you’re still trying to cope.

“A faery?” He supplies, amused by the way you gesture with your hands, expression so open and easy to read. “A changeling raised amongst humans to feed off their happiness?” His deep voice purrs it happily, as if he’s glad for it.

He is. His hatred of humans not something he feels the need to hide.

You appear devastated though, “I didn’t mean to—I don’t want to hurt or make anyone unhappy.” You mumble miserably, tugging at your hair and skin, as if that will dispel the magic which hides your true appearance.

“That’s just how our kind is, we need that happiness to grow properly.” He rubbles, eyeing your shocked expression. “We also happen to be fickle creatures ironically, and if a newborn is thought to need too much care, it is pawned off on humans who have more patience.” He clarifies, smiling as you seem to take him in with new eyes.

“You— are you a faery too? You just seem…” he chuckles as you awkwardly trail off.

“Evil? Centuries ago humans once called me the devil,” he laughs, his dark hair falling into his face like a waterfall as he shakes the loose fluffy curls, his pointed horns jutting from the top of his forehead jet black and smooth like ivory. He was too beautiful to call a devil, though you supposed it could be because of that which he was deemed so. His every feature seeming to catch your gaze with it’s beauty.

“I was going to say different…” you trail off shyly. “You don’t seem evil to me at least.”

He pauses, taking you in again as you regard him with those harmless eyes still wet with drying tears. It’d been centuries too since he’d left his kingdom, the entrance to the veil this lake he occasionally comes up to lounge by. He hasn’t seen a human since then, let alone a changeling or uncorrupted little faery like you.

He likes those pretty tears. He finds it annoying you shed them for humans you should guiltlessly take from.

His smile widens, eyes glittering mischievously and nearly glowing as he leans closer. The smell of sugar and cinnamon wafting off of him as you breathe in, nearly gasping as your mouth waters.

“How’s this little one? I’ll teach you how to be a faery, to show you there is nothing wrong with you.”

His eyes, where they should be white are entirely inky black, golden irises with reddened pupils framed by dark thick lashes, looked sincerely upon you.

He seemed genuine and kind despite his towering humanoid figure which looked to be capable of killing you easily.

It warmed you though, the thought of wanting to belong strong as you nod with a smile.

“I’d be eternally grateful.” You nod.

Sealing your fate.

“Tell me your name.” He asks sweetly, because despite his menacing size and sharp teeth and nails, your new friend was nothing but kind and gentle with you.

“Y/N” you reply easily, letting him playfully ruffle your hair as he picks out the leaves which got tangled in your locks from your travels here.

When he repeats it though, wonderful shivers shoot down your spine. He smiles, cooing at you like one might a baby as a he teases, “Such a cute name for a cute faery.”

You weakly protest, but fall into easy laughter as he swiftly changes the subject.

He was discussing proper fae etiquette. The basics, to not say please or thank you or I’m sorry. They all meant you expected more from the other or wouldn’t reciprocate, and that was just bad manners.

His soft hands, which could easily cover your entire face, were settled on your upper arms, having sat you in the grass against his chest.

He liked holding you close. Your little figure so soft, and from the dark circles beneath your human appearance, he assumed the neglect from the humans you resided amongst was growing worse. It was bad for your development.

“You should come live out here, they are vile creatures you know.” He comments every time you visit, though he never forces you to stay with him.

“It’s because I make them unhappy…” you explain sheepishly.

He shakes his head, thick brow arching as he rolls his eyes. “You are nearly completely mature now, you suck no happiness from your surroundings anymore silly girl.” Your confusion was palpable as he sighs and further explains, enjoying the squish of your tender flesh as he lightly squeezes you.

“While it is true fae infants are quite the hassle to raise, it isn’t as tortuous as humans make it out to be. In fact, most fae will take their child back if not treated well by their human surrogates.”

You hum, relaxing back against his warm chest and breathing in his sugary scent.

“So why wasn’t I—,” you stop short, brows furrowed but no longer speaking.

He doesn’t pry further, leaning his chin atop your head as he looks out at the lake.

“You won’t tell me?” You push, annoyed how he dances around your question endlessly. Your companion close enough that you feel insulted he won’t reveal it.

“My name is not to be uttered aloud, least calamity befall this land~” he’s teasing, you know he is, but still he refuses to divulge his name. “I gave you mine,” you argue again, huffing as he chuckles and lightly shoves you to your back on the grass, leaning over you and caging you in beneath him.

The moon is bright like the first time you’d met, illuminating his other worldly beauty.

“If you wish to call me something, call me Master,” he laughs, his sharp teeth no longer scaring you, but making your thighs squeeze together whenever he flashes them. He acts nothing like an immortal being, too immature and jovial to resemble someone having lived for thousands of years.

“So why do you get my name, but I don’t get yours?” You question in annoyance, avoiding his kiss to your cheek by jerking your face away. He huffs, sharp gaze daring you to dodge again.

You do. Earning yourself a warning nip to your collarbone as you yelp.

“Mean!” You cry, pushing at his chest as he snickers.

“Yes little flower, I am very, very, mean.” He rumbles, chest literally vibrating much like a cat does to purr.

“You give me weird nicknames…” you mutter, giving up as he licks your cheek. You don’t fight it, even as it feels foreign to you, trying to accept this side of your culture.

He licks your neck, lavishing the point where your pulse races with wet kisses and you tremble and struggle to act unaffected beneath him.

His smile is dangerous outside your view.

“Star!” You giggle, his rumble of irritation not the least intimidating to you as you roll away.

“That is an awful nickname.” He hisses, face twisted in disgust as you throw out the most horrendous names you could conjure in your pretty head at him.

“Lumi!” He growls.

“Then… Kitty?” He nearly bites you, careful not to play too roughly as he lightly tackles you down.

“If I give you a nickname, will you cease your little game?” He feels his anger fade as he wraps his arms around your smaller figure, easily pulling you into his lap. You don’t even flinch, too engrossed in your amusement to care where he handles you. You nod happily, your wish finally being fulfilled.

“Very well you stubborn creature,” he chides, “In addition to Master, you may also call me King.”

You frown. Clearly displeased by the lack of intimacy in the name. He laughs, amused by your obvious dislike. He kisses your puffed cheeks, over your pouty lips, and down to your vulnerable neck. Snickering as he goes, adoring how you so easily become pliant for him.

“I am teasing pretty flower, there was a time long ago I was called Ava, will you settle now?” He asks, voice husky as he sucks a mark into your skin, your little whine flaring his desires.

A strong urge to press you down and mate you nearly overpowers his control, but he merely holds you close and breathes your floral scent in to calm himself.

“I still prefer Kitty…” His eye twitches.

“Ava… this feels weird…” he pauses, looking down at your small form still cloaked like a human. Weak beneath him, partially nude as your skirt is pulled up to your soft belly. Your thighs are spread and shaking, his lips sucking another mark onto the thin skin of your inner thigh while you writhe.

He had your wet dripping slit open to the night air and his lustful gaze, begging for his tongue to taste.

“You don’t want to please me?” He asks, purring as you pout but deny. You were such a good little girl for him after all, so eager to learn and soak up his attention.

He resumes, licking down your thigh until his face rested above the warm mound you so sweetly offered him.

“You’re being so good for me petal, can you keep your legs open or should I help you?” He doesn’t need to look up to know you’re shaking in arousal and embarrassment. He can feel the tremors through the air as you struggle to keep your thighs spread as he asked.

“I-I need help…” you admit, feeling terribly hot as he keeps licking you, except where you seem to ache for him to lick.

He easily shifts forward, arms wrapping around you and letting your legs rest over his shoulders as he finally lets his tongue slip out to taste you.

You glance down, choking at the sight and feeling as he lets his entire tongue come out, the appendage inhumanly long and colored purple. It feels strange, the wet slimy feeling of his tongue slithering through your folds, but when he nudges the tiny nub hidden above your slit, you moan.

It sends jolts of electricity through you, hips canting up so he can to lick there again, earning you a hearty chuckle as he obliges. Licking and even curling his tongue around it, riling you up as your tiny hole leaks arousal and drips down your ass to the earth below.

“You’re making a mess petal, do you feel good? Should I stick my tongue inside you this time?” You moan, feeling the muscle prod at your unused vaginal entrance, too hazy to bother responding. He doesn’t wait for your answer, letting the thin tip of his tongue lap and taste your heady desire before poking and wiggling inside you.

It has your legs shooting straight, back arching as he holds you down with one large hand placed over your belly and chest. He groans as he feels the molten texture of your insides struggling against his intrusion, trying to force him out of your tight heat as he surges forward.

The tip of his tongue curls, swirling up and knocking the air from your lungs as a rush of hot liquid spills from your insides for him to drink down.

You shook and twitched, moaning and curling your hands around his curved horns like a handle.

The touch sends blood racing to his cock, as he moans and loudly slurps your cum down with audible squelching, enjoying the cries you released into the quiet night.

He lets you rest as he pulls back for just a moment, your body limp and panting as your high comes down.

“Good girl~” he praises, leaning over you to kiss softly at your sweaty skin, licking that too and tasting the sweet and salty mixture.

Then he’s pressing his lips against yours, forcing them open to sneak his long tongue inside your mouth, filling it and claiming that space too as his own. You’re helpless to resist, delirious on pleasure as he devours you, wiggling muscle curling and rubbing erotically around your own.

He tastes like sugar and something heavier, more musky, as you come to realize it as your own taste.

“Is this… really normal…?” You can help but ask as he pulls away, his lips still sticking close to trail kisses across your skin.

“It’s quite normal little flower, are you shy still?” He asks curiously, lifting one of your small hands and bringing it to his face, his size dwarfing you considerably. He lightly nibbles on your fingers, making a giggle bubble up as you smile and then squirm when he grins and licks your hand instead.

“A little…” you admit honestly. Always so honest and open.

He nods, as if completely understanding.

“That’s alright, we’re in no rush, I’ll teach you slowly…” there’s something else not said in his words, and you’re left drunk on his pheromones and lips as he distracts you. Then he’s kissing down, discarding your clothing and leaving you naked for his mouth and curious fingers.

Your breasts are lavished in his saliva, pebbled nipples sucked until standing upright before poked down with the tip of his tongue playfully. Always so playful, Ava nips and teases your skin, blinking innocently when you moan and glare accusingly.

“It’s not my fault you enjoy this so much petal~” he pouts, looking comical and so harmless, his glittery gold wings, almost translucent behind him, fluttering as if indignant to your silent accusation.

The golden tattoos which marked his skin more visible tonight, his clothing more minimal in his wish to feel more of you as he explores and plays.

Then he’s parting your thighs and throwing you into ecstasy again.

“Who did it?”

You sat curled around yourself, terror and dread swirling inside of you at the new side of Ava you’d never been graced with before.

The side you supposed was reserved for his enemies, but now showed to you.

Despite your fear, the tears spilling down your cheeks, and the injuries you bore, you still remained stubbornly silent.

He was going insane with rage and anguish.

You truly were a flower. So delicate and easily destroyed.

“Y/N… while I am being reasonable…Tell. Me. Who. Did. It.”

For all the times he’d made himself smaller, less alarming and more charming than his true nature called for, it made this time more appallingly. He stood to his full height, like an unwavering tree he did not budge or allow you to leave, golden eyes flaring and mixing with his red pupils to create something alarming. Even the markings which covered his dark skin seemed to glow and match his eyes, magic crackling in the air and silencing the night further.

As if the stars and moon were frightened too.

Still, still, you did not speak, even as he closed in on you, your fear so strong it almost choked him. Almost. He was too angry, too furious with the humans he liked to cast out of his mind. They needed to be taught a lesson it seemed. Their fear of the Fae renewed. They were becoming arrogant, as if their species was even in the same standing as them.

Your pretty injured face and form, battered from abuse and humiliation, was all the information he truly needed.

If you wanted to protect them, and not tell him, then he’d just punish them all as if they were the culprits.

It soothed him finally, his decision made as the ominous energy around him faded slowly. He let his rage dissipate, worry and concern bleeding through now as he crouched and shuffled towards you, claws spread and outstretched towards you.

“Come here Y/N, keep your secrets, but allow me to hold and comfort you…” his eyes darkened, the glow leaving behind almost a copper color, somber as he looks at you. There’s not pity in his eyes though, as you swallow and sigh in relief, grateful to crawl into his warm embrace where it feels safe.

He’s gentle as he wraps you in his arms, lips and tongue soothing as he tastes your tears and blood.

He grits his teeth, focusing on your scent and the feel of you to calm himself again, before letting his magic seep into your skin. You easily absorbed it, soaking it up like a sponge as your pain and injuries heal.

“Ava—?” Your eyes widen, amazement in their depths which stroke his ego as he taps his forehead against your own. His horns slightly tangling in your hair.

“Do you not want to drop the illusion on yourself?” He asks softly, staring at the human image your portray. He didn’t want to admit it, but it enraged him to see you still trying to live amongst them.

You seem surprised, before looking away nervously.

“It just feels strange… to not see myself anymore,” you confess, burrowing deeper into his chest while enjoying his ability to heal and soothe you. His sugary smell lightening your heavy heart.

He nods slowly, eyes staring at nothing over the still lake.

He holds you a little tighter.

Then you’re asleep.

The burns and screams of the people echo, the night come to life with flames and chaos.

Ava stands leisurely, smile filled with fondness as he watches the human village he’d followed and found to be your residence burn.

He’d spent all night playing with them, listening to them confess the awful things they’d done to you, said to you, and tried to do to you. They even thought of sacrificing you to some nonexistent deity, which only prolonged the nightmare he’d turned the populace into.

He laughed as the sounds swirled into music for his ears, the sharp points curling in delight as he hummed a tune older than the trees towering in this forest.

The night was still coming to an end sadly, and he’d need to return to your unconscious body still where he’d left it.

He didn’t want to let you wake in your new home alone after all.

His body covered in the blood of mortals he’d torn into and feasted on, Ava left them to perish.

Alone you woke. In a bed four times the size of any normal one, within the walls of a palace you’d only ever seen depicted in stories told by faraway travelers.

You glanced down, at hands unlike ones you were accustomed to seeing. You were nude, unable to hide from yourself as you felt tears begin to sprout. The illusion magic wasn’t working, and you couldn’t understand why.

This body was your true form, not that of the human you continuously tried to convince yourself you were. You hadn’t showed Ava, too afraid he’d see your appearance and dislike you for it.

While he was magnificent, you felt puny and odd.

A hiss snatches you from your self loathing, eyes flicking up to land on the one you’d just been thinking of.

He was covered in something, though you weren’t entirely sure what until he moved closer. The pearls lining his chambers glowed softly, his appearance more vibrant as he closed the distance between himself and the bed you laid on.

You sucked in a breath, realization dawning as the red contrasts against his skin. His lower face completely smeared in it, but his lips seemed clean. Until he grinned, red stained sharp teeth with chunks of dark meat stuck in between.

You remembered briefly him mentioning being mistaken for a demon.

You finally understood as a strange fear blossomed in your gut and you scooted away. Confusion and terror consuming you, but your body not catching up with your mind, because it recognized his scent and touch. You didn’t move quick enough, a clawed hand easily curling around your ankle and tugging you close. You slid smoothly over the cool silk, brought close to his body radiating heat. He only wore trousers, his taloned feet bare and ankles revealed as he’d cuffed them up to avoid bloody human fingers trying to grip them.

“Oh my little flower, look at you,” his eyes are swirling melted gold, enchanting and so disorienting. His beauty becoming savage with the blood and human flesh he adorned.

“A-Ava…” you want to ask, but you also don’t want the answer.

Did he find out who hurt you? Or was it unrelated? It seemed too coincidental.

Your chest constricted painfully as he stared down at you in wonder. Your true form so lovely it took his breath away, your image so fitting for you it was a wonder why you didn’t prefer this over your human mirage. Your ears, pointed like his own, were curled down a little with your emotions, as his eyes traced your face.

The shape was the same, your body still so small, and your eyes still expressed every little thought without fail.

He hated to admit it was even cuter, though he mused it was likely because he was the first to see your true form.

An abandoned young changeling, one he only took mild interest in, had him so thoroughly ravenous for all of you now.

“Isn’t this more comfortable petal? Instead of masquerading as a filthy human, aren’t you happier to just be you now?” His callous words seem off, but you can’t quite fathom it all as the shock settles in.

“My precious flower faery, are you scared?” Yes, you wanted to scream, as his bloody face and body near you, his sugary scent over powered by the scent of iron and death. Fae hated iron. He shouldn’t be comfortable.

You choked, jerking back and trying to crawl away from him, but he still had your ankle caged in his hand.

He laughs, but it’s empty and devoid of any true humor as he stares down at you with something dark in his gaze.

He yanks you back, harshly and sending a jolt of pain up your leg as you cry out, pulled back beneath him as he crawls onto the bed over you.

He’s too close, nausea consuming you as you smell and see the gore adorning him.

He finds your useless fear amusing and annoying all at once.

“I asked you a question little flower.” He grips your face, smushing your cheeks and making you look at him.

He rolls his eyes as the tears you so love to shed spill down your cheeks.

“Yes… I-I’m scared…” his smile softens, almost becoming sweet and familiar.

“Good. You should be.” Your blood runs cold.

He has the mercy to bathe, but not alone. You watch as the spray of water from some sort of piping turns pink as it disappears through tiny holes in the marble floor.

He’s nude, like you, and even though you cower and try to turn away, he easily stops any and all retreats with hardly any effort.

“I thought you didn’t like the blood? I’m still not clean petal.” His fluffy curls are flattened by the water falling above, the warm spray soaking you both as you try not to wonder why the sticky redness won’t just wash away with the water. The dried portions difficult to get off without physically touching and rubbing him with your soapy hands. You wanted to know why he was doing this, being so mean.

His ears look more distinct with his hair flat, onyx horns prominent against his forehead as his lashes hold droplets of water to frame his golden eyes.

You try not to show it, but as the blood clears and his dark smooth gold lined skin is revealed, you notice the hard lines of muscle and purple veins which protrude.

You only come up just below his chest, and you can’t look down, least you see it again.

He was making you nervous and scared on purpose, but you couldn’t understand why.

Like a coward you didn’t ask either, because you feared the answer even more.

Ava shifts, fingers coming up to cup your face in his hands and tilt your head up as he leans over you and blocks the water falling. His claws jut out beside your head, one lightly tickling your pointed little ear.

He licks his lips, loving the sight of you soaked and naked, your pretty form so enthralling to his eyes he struggles to contain himself.

“Do you want my help…?” His tone is condescending, eyes uncaring in the least about your inner turmoil.

“Here,” he drops one hand, engulfing your wrist and forcing you to plant your hand against his abdomen. “You have to wash like this—,” he teaches patiently, like none of this was happening and everything was fine. He moves your soft little hand back and forth, the soap quick to wash away as the water continues to fall. “You need more soap petal.” He informs gently, moving to stop the warm spray and letting you both stand in silence now, drops of water falling the only noise besides your breathing.

He sighs when you don’t move, your eyes trained on the corner of the spacious bathing room, where an in ground bath rests. He would take you to the hot springs later.

He fills the hand he has control of with soap, and amuses himself with using it like a washcloth, your little fingers curling as your lips tilt down into a frown.

“Since you need the help,” he goads, watching as those sweet familiar doe eyes flash up a glare from the corner of your eye.

He smiles, a nasty grin filled with something sinister as he chuckles darkly. “Don’t want to be my good girl anymore?” It’s a loaded question you’re unsure of how to answer.

It hardly matters as he forces your hand down, until you jolt at the change in body part you were touching. He forces your fingers to close around his throbbing length, unable to touch or fully wrap around it as your head jerks instinctively to look at what he was making you do.

“A-Ava—,” you try to pull away, but to no avail. He only hums, the soap like lube as he uses your hand to jerk his cock, amused as you stare in shock. He won’t let you go, not when the sight of your smaller form holding his leaking rod is so arousing he comes a minute a later. Hips thrusting with the timing of the squeeze he forces your hand to hold, hot ropes of his seed shooting out onto your chest and belly as he cages you with his free arm from moving away. He allows his purple tapered tip to smear the remaining pearls of his seed on your skin, ignoring your whine of protest as he paints you.

“Fuck, that’s it, be good for me pretty girl,” he growls lightly, chest rattling as he releases his pent up frustration on your confused form.

Really, you couldn’t be more adorable covered in his release looking dazed.

His golden eyes heavy lidded as he crouches down to catch your lips in a heated kiss.

You swallow nervously, staring at Ava as he stares at you from across his bed chambers.

You’d fallen asleep after… after bathing, if you could even call it that, and awoken later to find yourself alone again. Ava missing and your body covered by fine silk sheets while you slept.

You’d scrambled about the room looking for escape, finding nothing but a single exit locked, which Ava now stood before.

He wore a pair of silken sleep pants, tailored to his enormous figure as well as a matching robe left loose and revealing a majority of his chest and abdomen. His wings weren’t physical but a magic which naturally formed behind him, you’d learned.

The gold markings on his body were duller than earlier, his eyes less vibrant and more cool as he looks at you.

He seems more… familiar. Less of the Ava covered in blood and flesh of humans and more of the one you’ve befriended.

He’s silent, unmoving as he stands still in the doorway.

You don’t want to make the first move, unsure in this new environment, but you similarly disliked all of this distance and miscommunication between you both.

You moved cautiously, much like the skittish animal he likens you to in his mind, off the bed. You’d wrapped yourself in one of his sheets, his scent clinging to you the only thing stopping him from tearing it off you in annoyance. He stays put, muscles taunt and jaw clenched as you approach him like he might harm you.

He debated it.

Briefly showing you why you should be obedient and just listen, but dismissing it in favor of you liking him at least to some degree.

When you reach him, he merely stares down at you, face impassive unlike your nervous and awkward expression.

“Ava…?” He finally shifts, leaning down to close the distance a little but still not touching you. It’s you who initiates, because he’s certain he’s trained you well enough in your past touch starved state that you can’t resist the comfort and warmth he provides. You wrap your arms around his waist, pressing your figure to his while looking up with those honest eyes he adores.

He finally relaxes, your touch so addicting he was unable to resist wrapping you further into his embrace while lifting you up. Your legs wrap around him instinctively, warm bare cunt now pressed against his abdomen while your arms come around his neck. The sheet loosening and falling down to pool at his feet. He finally smiles at your flustered state, not letting you climb down to grab it, instead moving you both towards his—your—bed and easily laying you down to drape over you.

“You’re calmer than I imagined you’d be…” he murmurs against the skin of your neck, kissing up to your jaw. “Should I prepare for your wrath later little flower?” He muses, lifting up to look at your expression.

“Was that blood… from a human?” You look guarded but he isn’t surprised.

“Yes.”

“Did you kill them?” He affirms again.

“Was it because of… me?” Those sweet eyes looked so haunted as you asked, as if you knew what he was going to say.

“No. It wasn’t because of you.”

You check his face, as if he were a human and would lie to you as they do.

“Then why did you do it?” You breathed, sagging in relief beneath him. His lips twitch, molten eyes shining with adoration as he looks upon you.

“They greatly offended me.” He answers vaguely, but it was the truth. They offended him by breathing and walking the earth. It was a direct insult to him. They only met misfortune because they caught his attention.

You seemed happy to accept whatever rid you of any guilt, looking up at him less fearfully now that he was clean and not being mean to you. Though, you both shared very different definitions of being “mean”.

“Am I staying the night?” You asked him curiously. You had thought he’d brought you here as he didn’t know where your home in the village was when you’d fallen asleep.

He shook his head, lips curling higher.

“You’re staying forever.” He declares, sweet scent filling your senses as he comes close enough to kiss you.

Then he does.

You thought his teasing was funny, lips tilting up finally as the awkwardness dissipates and familiarity rises.

This is your Ava, warm sweet Ava that smells so good it makes you crave sweets you cannot afford.

He presses you further into the unfathomably soft bed, his lips demanding as you open for him.

“Ava,” you break the kiss, breathing heavier as he growls and nips at your bottom lip, a shiver wracking you as he leans back enough to meet your gaze. “What we’re doing… it’s what lovers and spouses do isn’t it? At least, this is what human lovers do…” your voice becomes smaller as he stares down as you with an expression you couldn’t name.

“And?” He encourages.

You look away for a moment, gathering your thoughts before remembering out of all the cruelty in the world, Ava was the outlier.

“Is that what we’re doing? Like lovers?” You felt too embarrassed to directly state it, to say it aloud, and equally scared this isn’t anything different than exchanging a handshake with another faery to him. It was different to you.

“Do you want it to be?” He leans down, placing a feather soft kiss against your temple so you couldn’t see his eyes glowing bright. “Do you want us to be like lovers little flower?” His voice is deeper than usual, strained almost as he holds himself perfectly still above you.

You take the time to think, much to his displeasure, but when you answer it was everything for him.

“I do.”

He places a chaste kiss to your lips, his own tilting higher and higher until he’s grinning gleefully.

“Then that’s what we’ll be.” He confirms, and you miss it.

You miss every little trap he’d laid, each tiny piece of the puzzle forming around you like a cage. You miss everything and it’s too late to go back now. Ava muses wickedly, as he kisses you more sensually, lets his claws drag so delicately down your soft skin, he thinks how stupid you are.

“I’ll be all yours if you ask for it Y/N,” he speaks directly into your pointed ear, hot breath making the tips curl as you whine. The way he says your name is different than usual, more serious and seductive. You realize this seems wrong somehow, the way he’s making you melt so easily like this, how your panic and fear evaporated so quickly. You aren’t given time to think further, when he shifts and sits up. He sneers when you attempt to cover yourself again, gripping your wrist and lightly pulling you up too. On your knees, you face his chest, eyes looking up to see his heated expression.

Ava cups your jaw with one hand, and pokes at your lip with the other.

He doesn’t ask before his thumb invades your mouth, and you fight not to bite down or jerk away with his pointed claw inside.

He’s exploring, squeezing your cheeks until you open wide so he can playfully run over your sharpened canines. Curiously playing with your tongue until he leans down licks it with his own. It felt strange and erotic, your body vibrating with nerves and budding arousal as he explores you.

“Ava…” you wanted to touch him too, but he didn’t seem to be listening as he lets his hands trail down to cup your breasts, thumbs rolling over your nipples as your back arches into them.

So you let your own hands wander, bolder than usual as you feel his solid form beneath you. His skin is much softer than it appears, strange markings and golden symbols flat. He had no softer points aside from that, muscles like stone and occasionally uncomfortable to lounge against due to it.

He squeezes your waist, smiling mischievous as you yelp and glare at him. He does it again, finally chuckling as he lets his hands slip to your ass.

This time his squeeze makes you gasp, as he parts your ass cheeks and allows your heated core to be exposed to the air. His claws so careful not to tear your skin open as he drags you taunt against him, rutting his hardened cock against your soft belly.

He moans aloud as he sees the tip poke out between you, your breasts above a delicious sight as he does it again and again.

“You drive me wild pretty faery,” he smiles, licking your cheek as he easily lifts you up to toss you to the center of the bed. You sink in, huffing but giggling as he crawls over you, looking like a dark angel as he covers you completely to capture your lips in a much more filthy kiss.

“I want to devour you,” he purrs, licking and kissing down your neck and chest, spreading your legs. “Make you mine completely,” you moan, feeling delirious as he finally licks your sloppy pussy.

You moan when you feel his fingers prod your entrance, sharp claws gone and retracted as he pushes one inside you while he laps at your clit. It feels different and firmer than his tongue, able to rub and stretch you better as he begins sucking on your puffy nub and purring deep in his chest. “Your little nub is hard~ are you feeling good?” He teases, wiggling the tip of his tongue over your engorged clit.

Then he’s pressing a second finger in, a mild burn heating your core as you gasp and try to shift away to no avail. “So sensitive,” he murmurs, spearing them into you, your soft gummy walls forcefully spread around the two digits as he noisily slurps. He’s being messy and a bit rough, but your moans spur him on as he groans into your pussy when you begin clawing at his hair and whining.

“Ava! S’too much! Can’t—!” You squeak and almost bite your tongue when you cum, pussy sucking his fingers deep and massaging them as you soak his hand and face.

He doesn’t stop, eyes glowing bright molten gold as he watches you squirm and babble senselessly while he stuffs a third finger into your poor overstimulated cunt. Your little hole stretched wide around him, and he’s content to watch as your greedy lower mouth takes it as he pumps them into you.

You’re less amused though, body thrumming as the pleasure becomes overwhelming and you panic.

“Stop, I’m gonna make a mess, Ava stop—!” You cry out, eyes watering before tears fall as you struggle to stop the powerful pressure building in your core, hurting you with the intensity as he pushes you further and further. “Your insides are steadily swallowing and sucking my fingers in, aren’t you a little lewd?” He asks, unaffected by your dull nails digging into his forearm, eyes trained on your drooling hole below.

He’s got an iron grip on your hip with his other hand, nails digging into your flesh every time you try to squirm away. “You’re so lovely like this petal.”

He’s fascinated when you break again, clear fluid squirting up and out from your squelching pussy as he continues to shove his fingers in.

You cum so hard it nearly causes you to lose consciousness, eyes rolling back as you twitch and moan as the dam inside you bursts open.

You whine as he pulls free, hand dripping in gooey arousal as he brings it to his lips and slurps it up without any decorum, appearing almost starved as he gazes down at you with the eyes of a predator. “Messy girl~ I’ll teach you though,” his lips pull back to reveal his sharp teeth, “When you feel so good you think you’ll break, you’re supposed to say I’m coming, do you understand?” He asks darkly.

“No more…” your weak plea only makes him smirk, kissing you softly as he slides forward and uses both hands to cover your hips and lift your lower half up.

Your eyes feel heavy as you force them open, slow to realize that his enormous cock is now laid over your pussy, pulsing and dragging back and forth through your slick folds. The thick veiny appendage causes your trepidation to rise, realization dawning that he intends to fit that inside of you.

“It won’t fit—,” you weren’t being cute or coy, because while you may not be human, your form was still the same size as one. He was much, much bigger, and his cock certainly fit his proportions. You try to catch his attention, unable to close your legs with his body between them. “Ava,” He’s truly not hearing you at all, too enthralled and excited as he lubes his massive length up with your juices. He’s shaking a bit too, heart beating rapidly in his chest as he coos down at you mindlessly, golden orbs almost unseeing at this point as he lines up with your entrance.

“So good for me petal~ you’re all mine aren’t you?” He breathes, and you feel the weight and pressure begin as his tip breaches.

“Wait, stop Ava—!” You whine as the sting becomes a burn and then you’re being filled to the point of excess as you struggle to breathe anymore.

“Shh—♡,” he hushes you, pained as well due to the pressure around him, strangling him as he grimaces and drags back out a little before surging forward. “You’re mine now petal,” he groans.

You’re unable to form words as he works his cock into you like a piece which doesn’t quite fit, bullying and stretching you open to forcefully fit himself.

He leans more weight down onto you as you struggle and writhe, noisy cries falling on deaf ears as he feels himself slipping deeper as your body finally gives up on keeping him out. His tip touches your cervix, before shoving even further and smashing it up as your stomach aches in protest.

You lay limp as he finally bottoms out, twitching with your mouth open and drool pooling down your chin as you feel nothing but the feeling of him inside you. He huffs a laugh, the way you look ruined before he’s even gotten started.

You look like a doll in his grasp, his cock extending your stomach a little as it twitches inside you. Your thighs ache as they’re naturally forced up, unable to spread fully enough for him to settle so he’d merely folded you and pressed you down to prevent escape.

“You did it pretty girl, look at you~” he grins, one hand leaving your hip to press on your belly, making your eyes widen and roll back as you whine. “You took every inch of me in this cute cunt didn’t you?” This male over you isn’t familiar, even as his sugary scent seems to increase and smother you, he seems foreign in his words and actions.

The inconsistencies are difficult to track as he drags himself out of you, the fullness replaced by feeling each ridge and bump of veins decorating his cock as he slides out.

Then he’s pushing in again, stealing your breath and ability to think as he starts to fuck you.

“Don’t worry petal, I won’t hurt you,” you can’t quite understand as he pushes his thick rod inside you, brain shutting off as you go pliant in his hold. “I’ll go nice and slow so you never forget,” he moans as you tighten and jerk, “who owns you.” He’s holding back with all his might as you spasm and grip him in inside of you, walls sucking him back in as he moves to exit.

You make him forget.

As you slick his cock up with your juices, he begins to slip in easier, folding you down further into a mating press as he looks down at your teary face. You make him forget all the time he’s spent alone. Your moans increase as he picks up the pace, pounding nice and deep inside of you and ridding you of any thought beside him. He slips a hand down between you both, claws retracted completely as he softly presses on your swollen clit and throws you reeling into another orgasm around him. “Say it petal,” he grits out, the feeling of you tightening drawing his own end. He’s hardly able to move inside you, short thrusts all he can manage as he drags you over the edge.

“I’m coming—!” Your head tips back, neck bared to his eyes as you cum for him obediently.

He fills you up right after, heavy engorged balls drawing up as he pumps his first load of the day into you. His thrusts not stopping as he rocks forward, expression relaxing as his magic swirls inside of you, his mating mark slowly sinking into your soul as he works to keep his seed deep within your womb. You’re too fucked out to notice, the pleasure and pressure overwhelming your senses as you try to rest now.

Except his cock doesn’t soften.

He thrusts hard once he’s sure his bond has settled, feeling you so much deeper in his soul as he drags his cock out almost all the way. “It’s like your little hole misses me already,” he smiles, watching as you flutter around his tip as if to tell him you don’t want him to leave. “Tell me petal,” he slides back inside, jolting you awake as you stare incredulously down at where you both connect. The slick sounds of him slipping into your sticky wet entrance haunting as you whine, hands digging into fine silk as you try to push away.

He only presses you down harder, cock burrowing deep as if to anchor you. His eyes are wild and swirling, the color so bright it’s almost blinding in the dim room. “How does it feel to lose?”

You blank. His question not making any sense as the room spins and you’re overcome again with pleasure so intense it makes your toes and feet curl in the air where they rest.

“How does it feel to be utterly mine for the rest of eternity?” You gasp, tearing at the sheets as he picks up the pace, balls slapping against your ass as he begins to truly fuck you now. Enormous cock working you into a frenzy as you yelp when two fingers pinch painfully around a nipple. “You’re not going back pretty girl,” he laughs, face wicked and beautiful as you look up through blurry eyes spilling tears. “You’ll not return to that filthy human village,” he releases your sore nipple in favor of loosely gripping your throat, feeling your pulse beneath his hand. “You are not in the land of Fae sweet flower,” he lets his lips ghost over yours, his tip bullying your cervix as you writhe and move to claw at his shoulders. “You are in my kingdom, ours, where the corrupted Fae separate themselves,” you’re lost, eyes crossing almost dumbly as you come again, choking as you cry out his name.

You can’t move even an inch, unable to even squirm as you’re forced to take each punishing inch of his cock and he ruts into you.

“Your pussy keeps tightening up when I tell you all the ways you’re mine. Do you like this?” He delights in your pathetic attempt to push at his chest, clearly finished despite his balls still being heavy with his seed he intends to spill into you.

“A-Av-Ava!” You struggle to form even his name, let alone any sentences as he keeps up his fast and brutal pace. Though, from his perspective he was still holding back as he moans and spills himself inside you again.

“Yes flower?” He coos, pushing your hair out of your sweaty face as he pulls out just enough to grip your thigh and turn you on your side, sliding back to the hilt again. He hugs your leg to his chest, working his cock at a new angle in your abused pussy still spilling cum from earlier. “I’m listening,” he chuckles, knowing you can’t speak, aware his cock was keeping you like this.

Words die down as he uses his hand not holding your leg up to grip your hip, holding you still while pushing his hips forward, railing himself inside your exhausted body. Your head rests against the bed, mouth open as your saliva soaks into the sheets, eyes staring at nothing as you feel another impending orgasm approaching.

Ava doesn’t mind, adoring the cute cock drunk expression as he uses you like a toy, filling you up over and over while you slowly lose your mind. “I’m sorry—Ava please, I’m sorry,” your slurred speech and delirious voice make him laugh. Genuinely amused by your rambling, “Why are you sorry petal? I’m not mad,” he catches your lips, tongue invading and swallowing your cries. He finds you so cute.

His cute, stupid little changeling, so trusting and unaware of his unsavory intentions.

You lose consciousness and count when he comes with his hips pressed deeply into your ass, pressing you belly first into his hand as he keeps you angled up to meet his thrusts. Your sensitive chest rubbing against the silk below, body limp as your world goes black and you convulse around him.

This time he lets you fall flat into the soaked bedding, taking his still hard cock out so he can pry apart your pussy lips and watch his release ooze out of your gaping hole.

His golden eyes flick up to your sleeping form, lips pulling as he coos, “Cute~♡” before he’s stuffing you full again, merciless as he leans on one arm to keep from crushing you as he continues to drill into you.

Even when you regain consciousness, trying to crawl away from his torturous pleasure, he only grips your arm and twists it gently behind you to hold. “You’re soaked and so hot inside, do you know how crazy you’re making me?” He groans, almost sounding like he’s in pain as you squeeze and come again. “I’m not letting you go, stop trying to run. You’ve already lost sweet girl.” As he lifts his hips, tip still encased by your wet hot heat, he eyes the slick mess which coats you both and connects you to him. “Go ahead and go crazy too, be good and listen.” He laughs, slamming back in and making your back arch as you nearly scream, feeling him so deep it makes you wonder if he’s going to break you. You really will go crazy, it’s a fleeting thought stolen by his cock once again, but you truly worry as he drowns you with euphoria and madness.

He’s hunched and leaning over your back, letting his tongue and teeth tease your ear so sweetly while he pounds you stupid, whispering to you things you won’t remember.

“You wanted my name so badly, didn’t you my lovely mate?” He knows you don’t understand, but it doesn’t stop him from speaking on, husky voice lulling you as you cry and lose yourself to pleasure. “I’ll tell you since you’re being so good, taking my seed so well~” he lets a little more weight settle on top of you, his cock nestling into your deepest parts with it.

“I am Avarice.”

Post dividers by @cafekitsune

#Dark Fae King x reader #Yandere Fae King x reader #Yandere Fae #monster smut #Greed x reader #Fae smut #faecore #yancore #yandere x reader #fae king #yandere smut #Dark Fae #kinktober fun #request filled #afab reader #Fae x reader smut #changeling #changeling reader

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chxrryhansen · 19 days

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𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐃𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐍

Pairing; Dark!Rafe Cameron x Innocent!Reader

Warnings; CNC!!!! DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT. smut, extremely dark themes, unprotected sex, public sex, choking, drugging? (rafe manipulates reader into snorting a line) degrading terms (slut, whore) loss of virginity, tiny bit of blood, breeding kink, size difference, daddy kink, dumbification, dacryphillia, no aftercare!! i think thats it? Minors please DNI!!!!!

Summary; Based on x.

authors note; i really thought about never finishing this because i just haven’t had the motivation or wanted to write in quite a while. but i’ve been neglecting you guys! so i tried my best to finish it, however i literally hate this fic so much so please don’t come at me bc i know its shit😛 its around like 1.3k words so… take it or leave it ig.

“Hey, so uh, you come here often?” The boy says, rubbing his nose with his right finger while motioning with his beer filled hand to the party further down the beach.

Your friend had dragged you to one of the weekend bonfires at the beach, kooks only of course. Which is exactly what you were, a sheltered, spoilt, kook. Right down to the core.

Your family had given you everything you ever wanted growing up, paying for homeschooling from the best private tutor on the island, buying you whatever the new pair of heels on the market was, but that never deterred your sweet heart.

You weren’t a prude and even though you were, you didn’t act spoilt, you appreciated everything your family did for you. You didn’t have many friends considering the private life you lived. Your best friend was your neighbour, both of you having grown up together, your father and hers both being in the same business really tied the strings in your friendship.

She was quite the opposite of you, partying every weekend, hanging out with boys and drinking to the point she was incapable of walking. Long story short, she had begged you to come, a promise of a sleepover and movie night afterwards.

Except that wasn’t the case. Within 15 minutes she had found a new man to latch onto, leaving you sitting by yourself on a wooden log infront of a small campfire someone must’ve ditched.

You looked up, a tall muscular boy with a backwards cap staring down at you, his pretty blues lighting up in the reflection of the fire. You didn’t answer him, being too caught up in the flare of his strong presence. His aura was engulfing, your body instantly being drawn to him.

You didn’t know it of course, but Rafe did.

One look at your pretty face and the sweet scent of your purity and he just knew he had to have it. A smirk appeared on the boys face as he took a seat on the log next to you, his eyes never leaving your own.

“Gonna’ answer me, sweetheart?”

“Uhm, n-no not really, it’s my first. My friends around here somewhere… not sure where she went.” You murmured.

Rafes smirk widened, how blessed he was to have stumbled upon a sweet, innocent, little bunny like you.

“S’okay. I can keep you company. Name’s Rafe.”

The boy reached into his pocket and pulled out a little white baggie filled with a powdery substance. Noticing your stare he asks “You want some?”

“What is that stuff?” you mumble, knitting your eyebrows together in confusion.

“This shits the good stuff, s’ like powdered sugar. Gets you feelin’ real good, one line of this and you’ll feel on top of the world, sweetheart.” he smirks moving closer to the point your knees touch, yet his eyes still don’t leave your own.

“C’mere, lay back a little.” and do you do.

Without question.

Which of course stirs Rafe’s dominant instinct, he just cant stop thinking about shoving you onto your knees and fucking your throat til you choke on his fat cock.

But he’ll save that for later.

Rafe proceeds to pour a little powder onto your chest, sitting perfectly above your perky tits. He then reaches into his pocket and picks out a bank card, then using it to create a smooth line on your chest.

He moves in. Snorting the line right off your tits. A tingly feeling appeared in between your thighs. The sensation of his hot breath on your chest making your own increase.

He leans back and looks towards the sky, his curtains framing his face as he does so, lifting a finger and closing a nostril he sniffs deeply, sighing in relief afterwards. “See, easy as that. Your turn, beautiful.”

“M’kay” you shrug.

Hook. Line. Sinker.

Rafe shifts on the log, lying down on his back and spreading his lets wide. He repeats the process on his abs, pouring the coke, creating the line and then ushering you forwards.

“Remember. All you gotta’ do is cover one of your nostrils, and use the other to sniff it right up. You got that?”

“Mhm” You nod excitedly.

“Ah ah ah. Use your words.”

“Yes Rafe. I got it.” You whisper, your pretty doe eyes staring up at him.

“Good girl.” He groans as you begin to snort the coke from his abs. His cock is painfully hard which obviously you didn’t notice, his pre cum leaking from his swollen tip, desperate to have your soppy cunt wrapped around it.

Within 5 minutes the drugs had hit you.

Your head was spinning and your control of your own body wavy, your movements restricted.

“I-i feel kinda fuzzy. Don’t like it…think i’m gonna’ go home now.” Rafe debates begging you to stay, but a better plan crosses his mind.

An eery smirk appears across his handsome features. “How about i walk you, s’ not safe for a pretty girl like you to be out in the dark all by yourself.”

The second you’re out of sight from the beach a hand wraps around your mouth, Rafe’s body pressing your own against a tall tree, blocking any escape. Your eyes go wide in fear, tears beginning to well up as you attempt to scream.

Your tears should make him irritated, angry even. But it doesn’t. It only turns him on more. His dick growing harder by the second.

“Shut the fuck up or i-i swear to god i’ll slit your throat. Can’t believe you kept this innocent act up. I can practically smell how soaked you are you fuckin’ slut.”

Before you can even think of screaming you’re cut off by your own wail as Rafe’s cock disappears between your folds. He bottoms out in one harsh thrust, your legs become slack as he grips your hips, holding you upright on his length.

“So fuckin’ tight. Gonna’ fuck you so good you’ll forget your own god damn name.” He growls.

The sound of clapping skin begins to echo, the skin of your ass turning raw due to his brutal thrusts. The tears don’t stop, only beginning to mix with the drool and sweat leaking down your face. Your wails and whimpers turn to moans as your cunt soaks his length.

Rafe knew you were perfect, that’s why he picked you. But this just proved him right.

“Fuckkk. You like that? Who knew you’d be such a dirty whore f’ me.” He chuckles, throwing his head back in ecstasy, yet his thrusts don’t slow. His pace almost animalistic.

The sensation of your pussy clenching tells Rafe what he wanted to know.

Rafe lets out a loud groan. “Jesus. You’re gonna’ fuckin’ cum aren’t you? Getting off on your rapists cock. Ask me. Ask daddy if you can cum.”

His hand wraps around your throat, squeezing tightly as your eyes roll to the back of your head.

“Please can i cum daddy? I need it s-so bad.” You whine, shifting your hips back and forth, fucking yourself on his shaft, your back still pinned against the tree.

“Cum. Cum for daddy. Holy shitttt, pussys grippin’ me like a fuckin’ vice.”

Your cream coats his cock as you scream, biting your lip harshly to try and muffle your pleasure.

“Wouldn’t be surprised if the whole beach heard that from here you dumb slut.” He groans, lifting a hand to fist your hair, tugging harshly.

His thick cock continues to pummel your insides, your pussy throbbing as he fucks you through your high.

As Rafe looks down he notices a glint of red at the base of his shaft. The sight of your cream and blood alone brings him closer to the edge.

“Gonna’ cum in this pretty cunt, can’t wait to fill you up, baby. Daddy’s gonna’ cum.”

His release is met with a loud growl, his balls throbbing as his load fills you, thick ropes of his hot cum shoot into your pussy.

“That’s ittttt. fuck. Taking my cum like such a good girl.”

Rafe is slow to pull out, inching you off his cock as he pants trying to catch his breath. His hold however never leaves you, ensuring you don’t fall due to the brutal fucking you just received.

His attention is grabbed at the sound of your sobs, his thumb swiping over your cheek and collecting your tears. His pretty blues stare into your own, almost waiting for you to run.

But you don’t.

“Shh Shh Shh. No more tears. Daddy’s gonna’ take care of you from now on.”

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron smut #drew starkey #drew starkey smut #rafe obx #outer banks #rafe #rafe smut #dark rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron x y/n #drew starkey x reader #rafe cameron prompt #rafe cameron fic #rafe cameron imagine #drew starkey fic #outer banks smut #outer banks fic

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koemiexists · 3 months

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Love and Devotion | Alastor x Fem Reader

summary: you descend from Heaven because you can't stand not being with your husband any longer. word count: 9.7k (apologies...) tags: vaginal sex, cream pie, semi-public sex, making love, making out, voice kink, oral sex, demon sex

Charlie’s voice pierced through the awkward silence, grinning at Alastor shakily. “Today’s exercise will include Alastor...!”

Silence rang throughout the room, and Charlie took a deep breath, smiling even wider, even though everyone knew just how forced it was.

“The Radio Demon....! Alastor. ” She nodded next to her, and jumped slightly when he used his shadow to appear next to her within a few seconds. “Okay! We will have Alastor, uh, play some music-”

“Jazz,” He interjected, his grin stretching further.

“Yes! Jazz! While we reminisce about our past life...! What could have been, what should have been, what we wish we never did. It’ll allow us to reflect, and help atone our sins to be redeemed!”

Alastor let out a quiet hum sound, and snapped his fingers, a radio appearing in his hands. Tucking his cane underneath his arm, he placed his right hand over the radio, supporting the bottom of the electronic with his left. He felt his mind drift as the radio frequencies buzzed and bits of different channels were barely heard. Some sounds of a woman talking, then some blues, a bit of classical- and there was jazz. He lifted his right hand, grasping his cane as he set the radio down on the coffee table, looking at Charlie.

“Seems as if I am no longer needed. Such a shame, however I wouldn’t wish to intrude on your group bonding activities! It was a pleasure to help you all, though.” He smirked slightly, bowing just barely before he turned, walking to his room.

Now safely in his room, he felt his resolve crumble slowly, the pain weighing deeply. However, he couldn’t afford for this to happen, so he inhaled deeply, and gripped at the rubble.

He tugged , and the once slowly slipping mask of a smile was replaced with a bright grin, brighter than his normal ones, but not at all genuine. Alastor blinked, looked at his hands, annoyed he almost went against his own saying.

In a different afterlife, if he didn’t have strong emotions, he wouldn't still be plagued by your death. It’s been years. For Lucifer’s sake, it’s been an entire century plus some, and yet he can’t help but long for you.

Gathering his bearings, he adjusts his blazer and the grime off his monocle. He was absolutely impeccable, reveling quietly at his pristine appearance.

Alastor glanced at his dwellings, closed his eyes, and turned for the door, accepting only for these few hours that he can not think about his wife.

You were in your house when you died.

Patiently, you were waiting for your husband, Alastor to return from his radio show. You smiled, knowing just how well he did. He mentioned in passing that after this paycheck he’ll buy you a ring, and you’ll both go on a getaway trip for the week.

If only that happened.

You let out a scream when you heard the glass break, the sound echoing throughout the house. You had run to the phone, shaking as you spun the small wheel at the base of the phone, repeating the numbers of Alastor’s work phone in your head as you input it into the machine.

It rang.

And rang.

When Alastor’s voice sounded at the receiver, you started to speak, blabbing, almost fully incomprehensible.

“Someone-” You gasped, tears rolling down your cheeks as your husband tried to comfort you, and understand exactly what you were saying. “Someone broke in-!”

A deafening bang sounded, and all you could hear was your own body hit the floor, and the gurgling sounds you made before you died.

You knew that Alastor heard the same.

When you came to, you realized you made it to Heaven. It was a bit of a shock to you, as you remembered the time you helped a lady steal some baby food. It was needed though! At least, you told yourself she needed it. Her baby looked awfully malnourished.

Shaking your head, you walked up to the gate, and smiled when the blond angel said your name.

That was a century or so ago, and you longed for your husband still. One of the angel’s, Adam, tried to get you to forget about your late husband and date him.

You never did though, because you still had hope. You had so much hope. If he wasn’t in Heaven, he had to be in Hell, and you had decided that you didn’t want to wait any longer, you wanted to find him.

Descending down was relatively easy, somehow. No one truly bat an eye, and in record time you were down in Hell.

You wrinkled your nose, and hid your wings to try and conceal how out of place you looked with all the sinners. You realized quickly though that despite you being an angel, no one dared to approach you with the intent to harm.

Taking a deep breath, you tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, walking with haste. You didn’t truly know where you were going, frantically looking anywhere for him. The surroundings became increasingly more violent and populated, and you were just so desperate to find your husband. A small thought popped in your mind, the what-if.... If he already died... from other demons....!

A sob wrecked your body at the mere thought, horrified you even thought that. You inhaled, wiping the tears, faith that your husband was strong, that he wouldn’t die so easily.

“Are you okay?” You almost broke your neck with how fast you turned, looking at a young demon. She wasn’t like the others in appearance, her canines were the only sharp parts of her teeth, and her hair was blonde. Her outfit was red, though, but her skin was almost milky white.

You felt embarrassed with the way you just gawked at her, and looked away. “I need help.” You quietly said, finally noticing the other woman next to the woman who talked to you.

The blonde demon tilted her head, before nodding. “We’ll help you! My name is Charlie, Charlie Morningstar?”

Your gaze shifted to the person next to her. “Vaggie.” She supplied simply, and you noted how she seemed annoyed. That’s when you actually took in that their outfits were much nicer than any of the demons you saw, and their hair was done.

“Oh! I’m terribly sorry, uh, did I interrupt your hang out?” You felt terrible, first your faith for your husband began to slip, and now you interrupted two friends, or lovers.

The tall demon, Charlie, just grinned at you. “Don’t worry about it! I offered to help you, didn’t I?” She turned to Vaggie, and leaned down. Words were exchanged in a whisper, and you looked away to give them some privacy.

Finally, Vaggie sighed and nodded at Charlie, who beamed.

“What do you need help with?” Vaggie asked, as the three of you began to walk in the opposite direction you came from.

You flushed, and looked down. “I was wondering... if you two know where Alastor is?”

Both of them stopped in their tracks, looking at you as you shifted foot to foot. “We do,” Charlie began slowly. “Is there any reason why...?”

You looked away. “Please? He’s important to me.”

The women looked at one another, chalking it up as if you're one of Alastor’s relatives. “Okay,” Vaggie agreed.

They made small talk with you, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to truly care about what they were saying. You answered as if on auto-pilot.

Soon enough, Charlie and Vaggie stopped, motioning to the large building built on a hill. “Here,” Charlie started, smiling at you. “This is where me and Vaggie work! Alastor is currently the facility manager.”

You thank them quietly, walking inside. Now in a closed space, you released your wings, ruffling them as you felt them ache.

Glancing around, you noted the color was less red than it was outside. Hell was definitely filled with just variants of red.

“Thank you two, for bringing me here!” You turned, smiling at the pair. “I’m still sorry for ruining your hang-out-”

“Date.” Vaggie interjected, hand on her hip.

You smiled. “Date,” You corrected yourself. “I’ll make it up to you guys!”

Charlie laughed, waving her hand. “Don’t worry too much about it. It’s nice to help someone.”

“Dear?”

That voice caused you to stop where you were, eyes going wide with shock. You slowly turned, letting out a gut-wrenching sob as you flew straight at Alastor.

His grin on his face only grew wider, and fully genuine as he grasped you close, hand in your hair as you crumpled against him. “Oh, darling.” He breathed, trying to pull your head back to gaze at your face. Your grip was almost too strong, but he managed to pull you off slightly.

You sniffed, feeling gross as you knew just how snotty and disgusting you looked, nose red and leaky from crying. Your eyes must have been pretty puffy, because Alastor gave you a small smile, soft and apologetic.

“I love you.” You muttered, almost completely inaudible.

“Wow,” A voice sounded behind you, and as you twisted to try and see who was speaking, Alastor pulled you closer. “Didn’t know Freaky Face over there was capable of having someone care for him.”

Someone else snorted, and you heard a small thump accompanied with an undignified squeak. “Angel! Be nice.” Vaggie muttered.

Angel, you assumed, huffed.

Pulling away fully now, you rose, sniffling as you looked up at your husband. “I missed you.” You said this time, and Alastor only grinned.

Charlie looked between you two, grinning sheepishly. “Alright, well, Alastor, care to introduce who she is...?”

Alastor looked at Charlie, before bringing you closer. “Well, this is (Name),” He started, his hand resting against the small of your back. “And she is my wife.”

“Holy shit.” The voice who snorted spoke, and you saw how he dropped a bottle of what looked like alcohol.

You felt embarrassed, even though you were proud to be Alastor’s wife, it was awkward for his associates to know it.

Charlie walked over to you, and gently held her hand out. You glanced at Alastor, and at his subtle nod, you took her hand. “I’m assuming you’ll be staying for a bit?” She inquired, and you just flushed a bit.

“I think so. Alastor must want to catch up.”

She smiled, and gently led you down a hallway. You noticed the decor, with the walls being colored a deep desaturated red. Gold adorned the walls, complimenting the reds. The hall seemed to stretch for quite a bit, and there were doors that led into multiple different rooms.

Charlie began to explain how this was one of the areas where Alastor’s accommodation was. She led you further in, before opening a door to your right. The space was a bathroom, clearly unused but meticulously cleaned to perfection. The young demon drew up a bath, and you suddenly felt the tiredness seep through, along with the gross feeling that stuck to your skin.

“Here,” She said softly, once she deemed it was a good temperature. The tub itself was grand, and there were bubbles on the surface. A faintly sweet and earthy scent filled the slightly steamy quarters. “I’ll leave you be-”

You shook your head, stumbling a little. You didn’t want her to leave so soon, especially with how accommodating she was to your situation. “Don’t? Please.” You inhaled quietly, gathering yourself as you spoke, your voice slightly louder. “I... I would like you to stay, and talk with me.”

Charlie obviously was mulling it over, hesitant to stay. You knew that apparently the people of the hotel were afraid of Alastor, for reasons you weren’t truly aware of, but you resolved in your mind that if Alastor had a problem with Charlie being with you, you'd talk to him. “Alastor won’t mind,” You started softly. “I’ll make sure he isn’t upset, even though he is... a bit possessive.”

Drawing the curtain, you slid into the bath, sighing at the heavenly feeling of the water. You identified the sweet smell to be vanilla, and you glanced at the corner of the tub, where a small bottle of vanilla soap stood. Charlie then sat down on a small stool and began to talk, mostly rambling about the hotel.

Once she mentioned what she was trying to accomplish, you interjected, beginning to tell her about how Heaven worked, the rules you had followed, the slight oppressing feel. Yet you also mentioned how it was everything she thought it was. Your conversation with the princess of Hell flowed easily, and soon enough you were cracking jokes with her, and she was asking you for your opinion on a variety of exercises she had in mind.

Soon enough though, she left the bathroom in order to get your clothes that were in the washing machine. She placed your clean clothes down by the sink, and bid you farewell as you finished your shower. Drying off, you saw the small note on top of your garments that simply said; ‘Don’t dally. I will be in my room. - Alastor’.

You smiled, and fixed yourself in front of the body length mirror, gently drying your hair to avoid it being frizzy. Once you deemed yourself presentable, you exited the washroom, scanning the hallway.

Noticing the murky shadows coming from one of the doors, you slowly made your way over, about to knock on the smooth dyed wood before the door opened quickly.

Jumping back in shock, you almost yelped out when you got pulled into the room. You blinked and looked up, noticing your husband staring down at you, a broad smile on his face.

“Smile, dear.” He started, voice low and staticky as he pulled you closer.

“Because you’re never fully dressed without a smile...” You finished, giving him an awkward grin, before you burst into tears, not out of sadness but pure overwhelming relief.

Your husband embraced you, stroking your hair as you just slipped into his arms. “Missed you so much.” You spoke in a whisper, almost inaudible as Alastor wiped your tears from the corner of your eyes.

His smile was small and comforting, staring down at you with pure adoration in his eyes. “I can see that,” He said teasingly. “You must miss me very much, mon cher.”

Giving him a glare, you pulled away in faux anger at his teasing remark. “ Now darling... ” You stiffened at the slight hint of danger in his voice as he pulled you into his chest again. “You know I mean no harm to my little doe.” He crooned, and you let out a breath, the threatening feeling dissipating.

You were slightly jostled as he maneuvered the both of you to lay face to face on his comfortable bed. The sheets rustled underneath your body, and you noticed just how grand your husband’s dwellings were. The sheets were made out of silk, the same material that your pillow case was made of when you were alive.

You know you’re spiraling in your own thoughts, but you can’t help as you recall how your husband doted on you, his deep russet eyes peering at you from above his round glasses that sat on top of his nose. “(Name),” He would whisper, his voice charming, and you couldn’t help the love that burst through you when you stared at your lover. “Would you let me bed you?” Alastor would groan in a husky voice, and you would lose yourself in the throes of pleasure underneath his body, letting him mark you and claim you as his only.

“Darling,” His voice sounded again, and you blinked, shaking yourself from memory lane.

“Apologies, Al.” You murmured, kissing the corner of his mouth. “I just...”

He hushed you quietly, stroking your cheek as he kissed your forehead. You smiled gently, and he tucked a lock of your hair behind your ear.

“You’re exhausted.” Alastor stated simply. “I’ll still be here when you wake up dear, so don't worry your pretty head.”

You shuffled, glancing over at the door, which was shut. “But...” You trailed off when Alastor shook his head slightly.

“Don’t worry about the hotel. I’ll show you around in the morning, for now you need to rest, you had a long day searching for me in an unfamiliar place, am I right?”

Flushing, you nodded, and laid back down, slowly drifting to sleep against Alastor.

The way to Hell was completely barred off. Frustrated, you had tried to break through the seal, but to no avail. No matter what you tried, you couldn’t shatter it.

You yelled out, pounding on the seal, wishing it would just open up. Why couldn’t you see your husband? What did you do to deserve the inability to travel to Hell to see your lover as you wish?

“You really think we wouldn’t catch on?” Adam snorted, kicking his empty drink away as he sauntered over to you. Your tears were running down your cheeks, and your wings fluttered, but no matter how hard you tried, they wouldn’t work.

Another angel came next to Adam, huffing. “Look at this demon fucker. You’re nothing but a whore, aren’t you?” She growled, and you let out a sob as she yanked you up by the hair, pressure in your scalp intensifying with each painful tug. “Look at me when I speak to you, bitch.”

“Chill Lute, fuck.” Adam rolled his eyes, and you hit the ground with a groan as Lute kicked your abdomen, making you double over, retching all over the floor.

Lute spat in your direction, glaring down at your shaken body as you heaved.

“Your little husband , he’s gone from you forever. You’ll never see that worthless sinner again. You have better things to do anyways, like dating me, you know.” Adam grinned. “Why would you need a sinner like him, who’s bound to die anyways by the extermination when you can have me? Adam! The first man!”

“(Name)!” You tried to fight off the hands that were grasping your arms, heaving as bile rose from your throat. “Shh, mon cher, you’re okay. It’s okay.” Alastor said soothingly, and you blinked tiredly as you stopped struggling against his hold.

Extermination? You couldn’t make sense of your nightmare, and you heard of Adam before, but not an angel named Lute. The pictures were muddled, like an oil painting, and you couldn’t understand what you had seen, what you heard in those few moments of sleep that grappled you.

You shuddered, the cold whipping against your smooth skin, and you pulled the blanket over you more, glancing at Alastor, who’s grin was tense now, looking down at you. “Nightmare.” You whispered, not providing any more context other than the word.

Alastor, thankfully, seemed to understand you weren’t up for talking anymore, especially not what occurred in the nightmare, instead he pulled you close, your chest pressed against his. He helped you hook your leg over his own, as you two were intertwined partially.

“I don’t believe I can sleep now.” You started again, voice quiet as Alastor blinked at you. Then he leaned in, pressing his lips against yours. You were a bit annoyed that he would just kiss you after what had just happened, however you knew you didn’t elaborate on what you saw so he had no way of knowing the severity that the nightmare has done to you.

He kissed you deeper, dragging his right hand from your wrist to in between the both of you, his nimble fingers pressing delicately at your clothed heat. You couldn’t help but gasp, and he moved his mouth to swallow your sounds, pressing his tongue against yours. A whimper escaped you afterwards, and he pulled away to nip at your neck, rubbing small circles at your cunt. Your eyes were lidded, and you jerked in his hold, wishing that he would just tear your undergarments away and fuck you like you been wanting.

“Needy,” he huffed, and you felt your cheeks heat up as Alastor used his claws, ripping your lace panties straight to shreds. You shrieked at the sudden action, yet Alastor kept going, kissing you again. His hand is rubbing at your clit now, and you shuddered against him, wishing you had more contact instead of just his hand.

Smirking, Alastor repositioned the two of you, slotting his hips in between your legs. You whined at the feel of his own clothing against your bare cunt, however he just hushed you, grin wide as he rolled his hips.

You moaned loudly, instantly muffled by his mouth greedily on yours. He held your hips in an almost bruising grip, licking into your mouth as he began a steady pace of rolling his hips. You heaved, and he bit at your lip before trailing down again to suck a dark love bite right above your bust. The heat was coiling deep in your gut, swirling as it tightened, his ministrations causing you to let out soft moans.

Alastor pulled you closer, staring down at you as began to go faster. His erection was pressing against your clit just right, and you couldn’t help the loud sound that exited your mouth as your thighs shook. Your orgasm flowed over you in waves, the tension letting go all at once.

Once you were done, you slumped in the sheets. You felt Alastor pull away from you, kissing your cheek. He shuffled, and soon you felt him right behind you, pulling you close against him. Your eyes fluttered, sleep beginning to overtake you.

When you awoke again, it was due to a delicious smell wafting from downstairs, and not a horrible nightmare. You slept exceptionally well, and you stretched, allowing your bones to pop. You unfurled your wings, stretching them too, before tucking them back in, blinking around.

Alastor wasn’t in bed with you. You felt your chest tightened, but when you glanced at the grandfather clock in his room, you noticed it was nearing nine, and your husband had always been an early bird.

You sniffed, and almost began to salivate instantly at the smell again. You looked around for something to wear, especially considering your underwear were now measly strips of fabric... then you saw folded clothes with a note on top of it.

Grasping the note, you noticed that it was from Charlie. ‘ Hey (Name), Alastor told me to drop off some clothes for you for the morning. He said something elegant and modest.. Which is kinda hard to find in Hell, however Vaggie had some clothes she didn't use, and allowed you to wear! Alastor also said you needed undergarments, so I went out and brought you some! OO, Charlie Morningstar.’

You smiled brightly, and turned it over, letting out a small laugh at the next bit. ‘PS: OO, because if I put XX Alastor would kill me. Come downstairs for breakfast when you’re done!’

The material of the garments were nice; smooth and silky. You slid into the underwear, and fixed your brassiere, noting that it didn’t have a wire, just how you like it. You wonder if Alastor had told her. The clothes Vaggie gave you were pretty, and you easily put it on.

Once you fixed your hair, you put a bit of lipstick on, enough for your lips to have a bit of color before you exited your husband’s room, bounding down the stairs to the foyer.

You noticed Charlie before she saw you, and you began to descend the stairs quicker. In your haste, however, your foot missed a step going down, leading to you to quickly plummet. You let out a cry at the sudden descent to the bottom floor, one that would obviously be painful, when you felt two pairs of arms wrap around you.

“Woah there belle , why are you in such a hurry?” You glance up, eyes widening at the demon above you. He was absolutely towering, roughly 8 feet tall if you were asked. He retracted his second set of arms, and you struggled to get your bearings. The demon was stunning, he was nothing like your husband, but it was obvious he got many compliments and other demons after him.

You realized that you haven’t said anything in response, and Charlie had come jogging towards you to check on you. Stuttering, you assured the sinner that you were okay thanks to him catching you, and in response he introduced himself as Angel Dust.

Thankfully, instead of pressing you about your awkward silence, Angel let Charlie whisk you away, and she excitedly mentioned that Alastor was cooking in the kitchen. The way she spoke made you realize that he more than likely never did so, which was shocking. When you two were alive, he almost always cooked.

When you asked him why, he simply said that he loves to watch you eat what he cooks you. Previously, you thought it was just because he didn’t like how you cooked food...

Shaking your head, you focused on the present, strolling into the kitchen with Charlie still fervently talking.

“Alastor is cooking up some food that he said you’ll certainly enjoy- but I never heard of it! It seems really good though. I’m mostly accustomed to popularized foods.” She admitted, cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

You nod, smiling. “It’s understandable. From what you told me, you were born in Hell?”

Charlie confirmed it with a nod, smiling. She was a bit bashful at her lack of knowledge about Earth, however you just told it was truly fine, and expected even considering she never lived a life up there.

When Charlie was inevitably distracted by her girlfriend, Vaggie, you walked over to Alastor, who was humming a tune that was just barely audible.

“Good morning darling.” He said without even turning, causing you to blink. You hesitated to approach further, considering how busy your husband looked. At the end of your inner turmoil though, you decided to waltz up right beside him, peering over his shoulder at the stove top. “Beignets.”

You looked at him. “Beignets?”

He gave you a toothy grin. “Is that not what I just said, dear? I made beignets. Don’t tell me all those years in Heaven caused you to forget your favorite dish...”

You shook your head quickly, nearly breaking your neck as you scanned the kitchen. “Where?” You questioned, nearly salivating at the mere thought of soft beignets that were undoubtedly covered with loads of powdered sugar. Did he drizzle honey on top as well? You swallowed audibly, and Alastor let out a laugh.

“You must be starving.” He remarked, and you couldn’t help the fact your stomach traitorously made a loud noise. “Wow, you really must be hungry! I could give you a dessert right in front of everyone...” He petered off, a growl in his throat as he stared at your exposed throat. “However, I think breakfast will do. Shouldn’t have sweets on an empty stomach.”

You can’t help yourself as you give your husband a faux glare, pouting a bit. You wish the other hotel members weren’t here, and you were able to just have him... But the smell of egg sardou was always appealing.

When you were seated at the long dining table, you expected breakfast to be a quiet affair. You were terribly wrong. Charlie gave you an apologetic glance as she tried to calm down Angel and Sir Pentious who managed to get into an argument. You tried to focus on plating your food, but Nifty kept fixing the platters of food, muttering about how it wasn’t clean enough.

Your husband was obviously miffed by this, and you noticed he took it almost as an insult to his cooking. In your peripheral, you saw how Vaggie began to comfort her girlfriend who was increasingly looking distressed at the fact breakfast was going awry.

You blinked, your resolve setting at that final scene. Without uttering a word, you stood up, slamming your serving spoon and fork down at the table. The commotion instantly quieted, and you began to move from your seat, fixing everyone’s posture and position with their silverware. They were absolutely wild in your mind, with some of them using the dessert spoon instead of the dinner spoon, or mixing up the salad fork with the serving fork. Your patience was running thin, and all you wanted was a peaceful breakfast.

“Elbows off the table.” You said, voice echoing against the walls as you strolled around the perimeter of the dining table. “Like that, yes.” You stopped in front of your seat, and glared at the others. “I expect this breakfast to be fine. Not perfect, but fine. I don’t want to be interrupted by your barbaric behavior. You’re in this hotel to be redeemed, and if not to be redeemed, you’re helping. Act like it.”

You sat down, and began serving yourself some of the egg sardou as chatter quietly picked up, obviously trying to heed what you said. Annoyance crept up on you, but you resolved to just focus on eating. Charlie had told you that she needed to speak to you after the meal, and you were pretty excited about what your new found friend had in mind.

The plates that littered the table were surely a sight. Despite the party being only a few people, Alastor still made sure to make a good amount of food. He graciously cooked up some of your favorite dishes when you two were alive, one of your favorites being egg sardou. You adored how he made it, and always cooked the eggs just enough. You never really liked your yolks that were super gooey, complaining to Alastor how it always made you nauseous. When he inquired, you said your brain always thought it wasn’t cooked if the yolk wasn’t partially cooked. Despite that, you told him you still loved the dish.

To remedy this issue, when he made it he poached the eggs for longer than necessary, and you absolutely loved it. You cut into the dish, mouth watering as the steam from the egg rose into the air, the hollandaise sauce rolling off the egg and onto your plate. You noticed how the creamed spinach part of the food wasn’t soaking, like most restaurants usually do. You hated the feel of soggy spinach, especially considering it’s supposed to be creamed spinach.

Taking a bite, you almost moaned, covering your mouth as you chewed your food delicately. You looked up, noticing how everyone was staring at you, minus Alastor who had risen from his seat to lay a napkin on your lap.

Swallowing your food, you flushed. “I apologize! I was truly hungry, and forgot to lay my napkin...”

Angel blinked, before speaking up. “That’s not why we’re staring at you, toots.”

You tilted your head in confusion, before the snake sinner, Sir Pentious spoke up.

“You look utterly graceful, (Name). It’ssss something we’re not truly used to.” He said, enunciating his s’s. You felt your cheeks heat up, and glance down.

“I must give you guys an apology,” You started quietly. “I was harsh with my wording and actions earlier. I was just purely frustrated by the fact breakfast couldn’t have been a peaceful affair... along with the horrendous usage of silverware. ” You utter the last parts, almost inaudible. However Charlie heard it, and giggled.

You glanced at her, embarrassment creeping up on you. “Don’t apologize.” She said, grinning widely. “I should be sorry, this is my hotel, and technically everyone here is under my discretion, and I couldn’t get them to behave properly.”

You shook your head, smiling too. “They aren’t children, Charlie.” You told her, turning back to your food. “I don’t expect you to carry that much responsibility. And I don’t mind helping out a bit either, with my knowledge on mannerisms and proper dining etiquette.”

The two of you smiled at one another, and you began to eat again, the conversation picking up speed now that everyone was content. You used the tongs in the middle to grab at two beignets, noting how Alastor’s eyes followed your movements. You felt flustered at your husband witnessing just how hungry you truly were, especially for his cooking. He always urged you to eat until you were comfortably sated back on Earth, yet you cannot help yourself from limiting your intake.

Beauty standards then were pressuring, and you didn’t want to be called a pig, especially when you were wed to a radio personality... one widely known throughout New Orleans...

Yet with his silent urging now, and the lack of judging looks from the others, you grabbed two more. The beignets were still hot from being in the oven, and when you gently tore into them, the pastry itself was light and fluffy. Powdered sugar dusted your fingers in an instant, and you tore a small piece off, popping it in your mouth. You scanned the table, going to wipe your hands with a napkin, before Alastor appeared.

Or rather, his shadow appeared, and the shadow grabbed the honey jar, using the specific honey dipper that was made out of smooth wood, polished perfectly to avoid any wood shavings in the sticky sweetness. You were pretty much in awe as the shadow drizzled the honey over the steaming beignets, and you felt your face flush when a hand gently swiped the powder sugar from your lip with a napkin.

In an instant, that moment was broken, and you were left feeling absolutely confused at the intimate interaction.

You didn’t let it show though, and began to eat in earnest, your stomach silently begging for food. If a noise was made, you feared you would have been so mortified that you would pass out. While you thought, you jolted at a small pressure against your clothed sex. You glared at Alastor, who gave you a wicked grin. The pressure against your cunt was obviously fingers, rubbing light circles against your clit through the fabric, yet you saw Alastor’s hands right there...

You flushed, and your mouth opened to let out a noise, before Alastor spoke up. “My my, Charlie! Weren’t you going to tell us about your delightful run in with a certain overlord the other day?” His grin was sharp, and you heaved a breath as Charlie perked up, beginning to talk to the entire table.

Shuddering, you inhaled sharply, which made Vaggie look over at you. You let out a shaky laugh, waving her off. She narrowed her eyes at you, then at Alastor, before turning to her pancakes.

You try to focus on something else, you truly did. You didn’t want to reach your peak in front of all your new found acquaintances and friends. Your breathing was unsteady, and you felt your thighs tremble as you inched towards your high.

“ Alastor! ” You hissed quietly, but he only smiled at your fidgeting self. The fingers slid past your panties, touching deep in your most intimate parts.

You couldn’t help yourself as you let out a soft whimper. Charlie looked at you in confusion, before vocalizing her concern. “Are you okay (Name)?”

“Fine!” You said between gritted teeth, blinking away the tears of pleasure as you were almost driven to the edge. “I’m quite fine, Charlie, thank you.” You grasped the edge of the table, biting your lip to stop your noises.

Charlie turned away, gathering everyone else’s attention from your off behavior to her, as she bursted out in a song. You wished you were fully focused on her, but the constant touches caused you to instead focus on orgasming and get Alastor to stop.

You let out a series of small ah’s before you orgasmed against the fingers, walls squeezing and relaxing around them. You wiped your sweat from your brow, and inhaled deeply. Charlie had apparently finished her song, about something you weren’t able to tell. It did what you needed, attention off you.

Alastor just gave you a toothy smile, then began to keep eating.

The rest of breakfast went by in a daze for you, with you eating your fill. You felt amazing afterwards, and had walked to the adjourned wash area. There wasn’t any toilet or bidet around, instead just a sink that was mounted into the wall. A full length mirror was to the left of the sink, and above was another mirror, purely for touching up the face. You turned to the right, where most of the cleaning supplies and cabinets were taking space. It was tidy, and when you opened the cabinet, there were a few drugs disguised as over the counter medicine.

You feared you overstepped, and quickly washed your hands. There was a hand towel next to the cabinet, but upon closer inspection you realized it was for cleaning, notably due to the overwhelming smell of bleach and other chemicals on it.

Exiting the small space, you gently shook your hands, finding no other way to dry them without a towel. “Oh! (Name)!” You startle, and Charlie runs up to you, presenting a small hand towel so you can get the remaining moisture from your hands. “Are you busy at the moment?”

“No,” You said softly, facing her fully. “Why do you ask?”

Charlie pocketed the slightly damp hand towel. “I wanted to know if you wish to run some errands with me? I think it’ll be fun to do, and we can talk on the way.”

In truth, you had wanted to spend time with your husband, but with the way Charlie gazed at you, longing for a female friend like yourself... you caved, eventually.

“Alright,” You agreed readily. She smiled, and directed you up into the more comfortable washroom, explaining that you should wear something sweet smelling to mask.

You were confused, but grateful for the fact you were in a larger bathroom. You took a moment to preen your wings before you folded them up, and they disappeared within your back easily. The marble top was littered in feminine products, like a curling iron and some hair ties. Among those items was a beautiful perfume bottle, and a note with clear handwriting. ‘ For you.’

Taking the glass bottle in your hands, you examined it, almost gasping as you touched the engraving in the bottle. It clearly had ‘ No. 5 Chanel Paris’ on it, but you almost couldn’t believe it. When you and Alastor were alive, you had seen it in the shops after it debuted. You told him that one day, you were going to buy it, and he promised that he’ll buy it for you in the near future, after he saved enough money.

That day never came.

Blinking your tears away, you spritz the scent lightly, inhaling the citrusy smell. When you took another breath of the perfume, you noticed the more subtle notes, flowers.

After you fully freshened up, you met Charlie down at the foyer, where she explained that this errand was truly easy to do, just tedious.

When you inquired, Charlie opted to glance away, whistling a soft tune instead. You narrowed your eyes at her behavior, before shrugging it off, choosing to ask her later when you two were out of the hotel’s range. Alastor had seen you two off, with him pressing a feathery light kiss against the back of your hand, eyeing you carefully.

You blushed deeply at this action, and chose instead to look away from your husband, who still manages to fluster you through death.

Charlie whisked you away after that, and after idle chat, she seemed to get more serious. “You know the extent of what Alastor has done, right (Name)?”

You frowned, shaking your head. “No. He never told me. Why?”

She seemed to pause at this, her steps faltering, before she continued her slightly brisk pace. “Well,” Charlie started, fixing her bangs as she looked at you. “He’s killed people.”

“I’m aware.” You smile wryly. “He’s a serial killer... heard a few sinners talking about him.”

“Yeah, but he also...”

“What?”

Charlie seems to lose her confidence in her words, instead opting to remain silent for a few long seconds, until she spoke up, finishing her sentence. “He also eats people.”

That stopped you, this time. You stared at her, absolutely bewildered at her statement. “Pardon?”

“It’s true! I saw him eat demons before-”

“I don’t wish to know that!” You cried out, groaning lightly. You rub your head, and begin to walk again, with Charlie stepping in pace with you. “Gosh Charlie....”

She had the decency to look upset at your own expressions. “I’m sorry, I just wanted you to know-”

You smile placatingly at her, before groaning again. “Wow.”

“Do you still truly love him, though? Despite that?”

You pondered her words. Did you? And in that exact moment, before you thought any further, the answer came to you. You turned to her, and she looked at you with expecting eyes.

“I told him in my vows that nothing he has done, or will do, will ruin my love for him as long as he doesn't hurt me. And he never hurt me. Even if he ate people, and murdered, he never hurt me, and he loves me. So if he loves me truly and genuinely, then I love him truly and genuinely too. I love Alastor, Charlie.”

She smiled, and gathered you in her arms, hugging you tightly. “Sorry, I just needed to know.”

You laugh wetly. “You’re forgiven, Ms. Morningstar.”

Charlie giggled, scrunching her nose. “Ew, don’t call me that. Makes me feel all high and mighty.”

“Are you not?” You jest, and Charlie grins at your words.

She stops soon though, glancing at her watch. “Well, I have to actually run errands.”

You froze, staring at her. “Was we not about to do that on this trip?”

Charlie turns away, whistling again.

“Charlie!”

She laughs. “Sorry! Well, not really. I wanted to make sure you were okay. I do have to run errands now, but I'll take you back to the hotel so you can spend the day with Al!”

You sigh, and give her a loose gripped hug. “Thanks, Charlie.”

“Don’t mention it.” She started. “I’ll support you no matter what, (Name).”

After a couple minutes of walking in silence, Charlie began to speak again. “By the way, you should tell Alastor to not engage while the others are around.”

You were heavily confused, and stared at her. “What?”

Her cheeks darkened. “Be, uh, proper at the table...”

“I’m not following.” You stated simply as Charlie got more flustered, biting her lip a bit.

“I sang to keep the attention off you.” She said instead, and you instantly flushed, embarrassment coursing through your veins. You opened your mouth to hurl apologies, but she shook her head. “It’s okay, it seemed like it was mostly Alastor’s plan to engage you anyways.”

You groaned. “Terrible you witnessed it.”

She smirked. “Yeah I wasn’t too much of a fan to know that my employee and new friend were getting it out underneath the table.”

“Oh my goodness, don’t phrase it like that!” You playfully whacked her as she laughed. “This is so embarrassing.”

Charlie gently rubbed your back, smiling. “Not anymore embarrassing than my emo phase.”

“ You had an emo phase!? ” You nearly shrieked, and Charlie cackled at your reaction.

“I won’t show you a photo.”

You nearly whined. “Why not?” Jutting your lower lip out, you looked at her with wide eyes.

She looked away, before finally caving. “Ok, fine, maybe some time this week.”

When the two of you arrived at the hotel, Alastor was waiting by the entrance for you. You bid Charlie a farewell as she turned around to run actual errands. Alastor gives you his elbow and you hold onto it, smiling lightly at the gentleman's actions he always did for you.

Both of you slowly ascended the stairs from the foyer, your steps confident and direct. Alastor let you lead slightly, before he understood where you wanted to go. His dwellings.

He opened the door, and you helped yourself in, sitting down on his bed. Alastor closed the door after the two of you, choosing to dim the lights instead of turning them up fully. The glow it casted the entire space was minimal, but you could clearly see Alastor, so you took his hands, gazing at him.

“What have you done?”

Your question was simple, and you knew Alastor was anticipating it, because he gently squeezed your hands, before dropping them.

“I killed my father.” You had always wondered where Alastor’s father was. You were always told by Alastor himself that he decided to leave the family after welcoming you in. It didn’t make much sense, in your opinion, but it was Alastor’s father, not yours, so you took his words as the truth. In retrospect, you should have prodded more, with what Alastor was telling you now.

“That was the first time I killed; then there was that man you call your friend-” James? “-after that was your other suiter, who almost stole you away from me-” Luke. “-that nasty gal who dared to slap my wife-” Patsy! “-and then strangers, people you do not know.”

You were appalled at what he was revealing. Charlie had only briefed you, but you were truly unaware that your doting husband, your lover, was one of the most wanted serial killers at that time. The biggest one in New Orleans.

“I only ate two of them...” You were horrified. “The rest was buried, truly. Or disposed of in the worst way possible.”

He looked at you, an odd look in his eyes. “Do you regret being married to me?”

You pause for a moment, reflecting on yourself. You don’t hate him, and he never hurt you, and in some sick twisted way this was his expression of love for you. Killing the people who hurt you. He loved you so much that he had killed, just for you, and made sure that you were never an accomplice by sheltering any and all knowledge that it happened.

So you did not regret being married to him, but instead, you fell more in love with him, with the way he loved you fervently.

“I love you.” Was all you uttered, and Alastor pounced on you in that instant, kissing you passionately. You let out a stifled moan at the suddenness of his actions, but you felt overjoyed knowing how much he cared and adored you.

Alastor pulled you closer, nipping at your sensitive skin, his eyes shifting from your form to your lips as he kissed you again. “ I am... ” He began, voice husky as you let out a startled yelp, his claws gripping your hips. Your eyes widened in surprise, then you moaned out wantonly as he pulled your legs further up, resting on his shoulders. “ Utterly devoted to you, darling... ” Your breath hitched and he moved down from your face to your thighs, nipping right at the skin resting against his cheek. “ And I will shower you with affection... When our time on Earth is up... ”

You realized that he was saying his vows after your muddled mind began to process, and he was saying it in his language, in French.

Your breath caught as he licked a long stripe against your soak underwear, a whine bursting past your lips. “ I refuse to let Heaven nor Hell bring us apart, and know that I will do everything in my power to see you, if not for one last time, if our paths were meant to part.... ”

“Alastor!” You moaned, as he snapped his fingers, your underwear disappearing quickly. The air instantly made you shiver with your now exposed dripping sex in view of your husband. “Shit!”

“ Darling.... ” He growled, the static that was present in his voice dropping, allowing his barely noticeable southern drawl to appear. With the transatlantic accent dropped, you could almost moan at the fact he was truly himself, if not for this one moment with you two. “I love you.”

You never heard him say that before, and you felt tears slowly roll down your cheeks as you sniffled, so emotionally overwhelmed with everything that has happened. You loved him so much, and in your marriage, you never heard him say it back at all, until now.

“I love you too,” You choked out, gasping as he shoved his tongue into your cunt, and you saw how he relished the way you wriggled and heaved from the pleasure that was coursing through your veins.

“You’ll never see Heaven again,” He whispered, and you thought that he hadn’t said that, you were purely starting to hear things until he spoke up again. “I will never let them have you, not when I got you back. My darling, my wife. The light of my life, I will keep you here with me forever.” He was rambling now, almost incoherent, especially with his face in your cunt, juices dripping onto his lower face.

You were no better, an absolute mess above him. Yet, when Alastor looked up, utter adoration flooded his face, and he gently nipped at the top of your mound, before angling his head, carefully nibbling your clit. You howled in ecstasy, letting out a heavy moan as your hips thrusted into his mouth, then tried to push back into the mattress to get away from the constant stimulation. However, Alastor held fast, licking and slurping the small bud, causing you to jerk and heave in his hold, your toes curling as you shut your eyes, allowing yourself to feel the pleasure as it is.

“Good girl.” He growled, sucking the bud into his mouth, and you let out a hoarse noise, gripping his hair, and then you pulled, causing him to groan into your cunt.

He repositioned one of his hands that was holding your thighs, angling it at your cunt, before he thrusted two fingers inside. You flinched in pain, and noticing your hurt movements, he pulled the fingers out, instead thrusting his middle finger in. With a steady pace, he began to thrust the digit in and out, pulling his body up to kiss your neck as he did so. “Such a good little wife for me. You’re my perfect wife, right?” He muttered, looking at you as he did so.

You groaned, and nodded. “For you- I’ll be anything you want.” You begged, bucking your hips and biting the inside of your cheek.

A second finger appeared alongside the first one, and he coaxed you to take it, like the good wife you were. You flushed at his words, and clenched around both fingers. Alastor moved down again, stopping right at your abdomen, and moved his free hand to rest right above your skin. “Are you ready for the main course?” He questioned, and at your fervent nod, his ever present grin widened as far as it can go.

Fear coursed through your veins, along with pleasure as you saw him slowly morph, his body doubling in size and his eyes becoming glowing radio dials, staring straight at you. His antlers that were usually hidden by his hair, elongated and you were now in such a position where instead of gripping his hair, you could grip at the antlers.

“Al....” You whispered, but he hushed you opting to instead rip all your clothes off. The shreds of your clothing littered the bed, and you silently apologized to Vaggie in your head for the now ruined clothing.

Alastor’s pants were quickly unzipped, and soon enough his cock laid on your stomach. You instantly paled when you glanced down, as you took in just how sizable your lover was in this new form. “Alastor.”

He made a small noise, eyes staring at you. “It’s not going to fit Alastor- You’re going to break me!” You whispered, your eyes staying on his length. The tip was leaking right by your belly button, and you whimpered. He was going to break you on his dick.

“ It’ll fit. ” Was all he said, and you let out a gasp when he slowly began bullying the tip of his thick cock into your pussy. Whimpers and pleads filled the room, but when he stopped, giving you a look, you realized you really don’t want him to stop.

Alastor leaned in, tapping your sternum twice, and then looked at you. You blinked, before remembering that your safe word when you two were alive was necklace. You shook your head, and he continued, disregarding your pained sounds unless you said the word.

You never did, of course, because you truly wanted this, and if the pain became too much you would speak up.

“Alastor!” You gritted your teeth, and he panted above you, his cock fully inside you now. While you focused on relaxing and breathing, he put a clawed hand on top of your abdomen. You glanced at him, and let out a startled moan as he pressed against the slight bulging of your skin.

“ Look how deep I am inside you, darling. ” You whimpered, and he pulled out almost completely, inhaling the scent of you at the base of your neck, before growling. “ Heaven won’t take you away. You’re mine.”

You moaned, agreeing completely. You won’t go back to Heaven, not when you have your husband. “Alastor, fuck me.”

He smirked, and began thrusting into your tight wet heat. You were rocked with every thrust, staccato ah ’s leaving your mouth as his hips slapped against your ass.

You knew what you signed up for, truly. You were well aware that you probably wouldn’t be able to walk for a day or two, and bruises would line your thighs and ass. But you loved it, really, the fact that Alastor marked you up so much.

“Harder,” You sobbed, pleasure overwhelming you. You hardly noticed when Alastor’s hand was at your clit, working circles against the small bud to increase your pleasure.

Groaning, you grasped his wrist. “M’close, I’m close-” You whispered harshly, rolling your hips into his ministrations, and you were right there--!

He stopped his thrusting, and you let out a slew of obscenities, glaring up at him. Alastor only gave you a smaller smile, cheeky as his form slowly went back to normal one. You were especially confused when his cock hadn’t decreased in size at all.

“I got a bit rough with you there, apologies, my doe.”

You blinked, huffing. “Just continue fucking me, Alastor!”

He smiled. “No.” No!? He can’t just tell you no! You feared he was about to leave you high and dry, gripping his blazer as you opened your mouth.

“I’m not going to fuck you.” You growled. “I much rather make... love... with you.”

Freezing, you shifted a bit, letting out a small noise at the feel of him still inside you. “Do it, then.” You beamed, kissing his nose.

Alastor let out a small laugh at your change of demeanor, almost instantly, but leaned fully over you, repositioning his legs. He gently cradled your head with his left hand, and his right hand hiked your leg up.

He rolled his hips into you at a steady pace, kissing you passionately. You bit his lip, and his grip got rough as he slid his tongue into your mouth.

You were sloppily kissing him, panting and parting for a few seconds before slotting your mouths together again. His pace stayed slow and sensual, and soon enough you felt your orgasm come back, slowly but surely building up in intensity.

“Rub my-” He hushed you with another peck to the mouth, his hand from your thigh going between your legs to rub your clit again.

Your noises were soft and erotic, and Alastor couldn’t help but get harder, his own cheeks getting a soft tint of redness to them.

“My little doe... won’t you cum for your husband? Prove how much of a good girl you are?”

You loudly moaned, bucking your hips into his as the thrusts got faster. You orgasmed soon after, the waves of pleasure never stopping as he forced you into overstimulation, staring you down as you writhed in his grip.

“More?”

A loud mewl came from your mouth as you pulled him back down to kiss you again. “More, Alastor, don’t stop-”

He smirked at the idea of spilling cum all over your plush body underneath him, but with the way you were begging, he knew you would want it inside you. For him to breed you until you were completely full of his seed, and then some.

“Come here, darling.” Alastor began to kiss you fervently again, losing his rhythm as he jackhammered inside you. “ I’m going to breed you, and you’ll carry my child in your womb. You’ll have to walk around the hotel with everyone knowing that you’re mine. You’re the Radio Demon’s wife, and no one can have even a bit of you. ”

“Fuck! Alastor!” You reached your peak again, thighs trembling around his hips as he pulled you roughly down, thick ropes of cum spurted into your womb as you tried to catch your breath.

He languidly thrusted a few more times, fucking the cum inside you. You tiredly looked at him as he propped your hips up with a pillow. “Round two?”

“ Tomorrow. ” You huffed. You were exhausted at the moment. “Please...”

Alastor smiled, and just laid down next to you, cuddling you into his body. You didn’t expect him to do such a thing, considering everything you heard about your husband now, but he only kissed you and told you to rest.

“You dote on me a lot...” You murmured, trying to stay awake for a few more minutes.

Silence filled the room for a while, before he spoke up, right before you fell asleep. “I care about you, (Name). I’ll only show this to you and our child.”

You turned to him, kicking the pillow from under you so you can wiggle your leg between his. “Could I even get pregnant down here?”

Alastor smirked and rubbed your abdomen. “I hope so.”

You rolled your eyes in mock exasperation, pulling him in for a soft kiss.

“Stay here, in Hell. Please, (Name).” He spoke quietly.

You just squeezed his hand. “I plan to.”

Alastor leaned in, giving you a kiss on your forehead before you had drifted off to sleep.

if only i was good at formatting with tumblr. (it hates me)

#oneshot #fluff #reader insert #hazbin hotel alastor x reader #alastor smut #alastor headcanons #hazbin hotel smut #smut #alastor x reader smut #alastor x reader #hazbin alastor #alastor #hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel

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forlix · 3 months

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𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀・741 / 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴・chan x gn!reader / 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲𝘀・fluff, hurt/comfort, suggestive themes so mdni / 𝗮/𝗻・inspired by our beautiful boy's bbl texts about the nylon shoot. he is so loved. i hope he knows it ♡

𝟬𝟵:𝟬𝟵 — Chan is nervous.

He doesn’t say so out loud. He doesn’t say anything out loud, actually, simply appearing in the kitchen to pluck a slice of toast off the counter. Damp curls dripping into the towel slung around his neck, brushing against your cheek when he leaves a good morning kiss there.

But there’s a squareness in his shoulders. A muted glaze over the brown of his eyes and a tightness in the smile he gives you as he pulls away. The images linger in your vision after he disappears back down the hallway, presumably to get ready for the big day ahead.

Words. There are times when they embrace Chan like orchestral musicians awaiting their conductor’s cue, like sunflowers swiveling eastward in the halcyon morning—but there are other times when they haunt him, like the faceless sea of spectators instead of the hopeful performers, like the shadows that comprise the fathomless night rather than the rays of sun that follow.

You rise out of your seat, a quiet sigh leaving your lips. Chan needs the sun, today.

Inside your bedroom, Chan’s towel sits atop your duvet, right beside the white material of the T-shirt he slept in. The bathroom door is ajar and spilling yellow light onto the hardwood. You nudge it open further.

Free to roam after the towel’s removal, transparent waterdrops pave silvery trails down the sides of Chan’s neck, over the gentle incline of his collarbones and the naked hills of his chest. His palms are pressed flat on either side of the sink, his eyes glued to the mirror before him, his jaw set as squarely in his reflection as it is on his person.

He jumps when your reflection joins his. Parts his lips, prepares to speak. But his whole vernacular evaporates when your hands find his waist, when your breath hits the nape of his neck.

“Baby,” he breathes.

There’s a question embedded in the word. The only answer you give him is the quiet drag of your fingertips down the center of his back. He expels an involuntary shudder, and with it the muscles beneath your touch shift like fields of marigolds tousled by a kindred breeze.

You kiss the highest ridge of his spine, letting your lips linger against the smooth skin for a few moments before doing the same, just below his ear.

“What—” He pauses, swallows. “What are you doing, angel?”

When your hands return to his hips, they request something this time. He complies, lets you turn him around, his lower back meeting the marble with a soft bump.

You bring yourself close to him. Close enough to gauge his blushing cheeks and trembling breath and brown, brown eyes, crossed from trying to look at you. Close enough that you only need slightly dip your head to mould your lips to the hollow right under his jaw.

He moans, the sound melodic and low and quickly muffled by the lower lip he bites down upon. You suck lightly, careful not to leave a mark yet entirely fine with the alternative, then graze your teeth over the tender skin, pull away. You don’t go far, though, as your next destination is his Adam’s apple, which you reach not by boat or by plane but by short, wet kisses that resound in the silent bathroom, that draw from Chan’s throat another gorgeous whine.

As you progress in this fashion, traipsing across the plane of his clavicle, the valley of his pectorals, you want to tell him that he’s beautiful.

He’s beautiful when he laughs so hard that his smile turns boxy and his voice gets all squeaky. He’s beautiful when he’s trying not to cry and his eyes look like mirror pools because he’s failing. He’s beautiful in front of the cameras; he’s beautiful away from them. He’s beautiful always, your Chan, your Chris.

That is what you want to tell him.

But you don’t. Not even when his back hits the mattress moments later and he looks like your every wildest dream come to life underneath you: pupils blown so wide that they’ve swallowed his irises, lips glistening and quivering and inconceivably kissable as he sighs your name, chiseled upper body rippling when he props himself up on his elbows. Straining to look at you as you lower your mouth to his navel, undo the knot of his sweatpants with a gentle tug.

You’ll show him instead.

🔖 (send an ask to be added)・@astraystayyh・@like-a-diamondinthesky・@fire-08・@starsandrqindrops・@txtxlz・@laylasbunbunny・@strayghibli・@nuronhe・@seungminsapuppy・@vivisoni・@moon0fthenight・@sweetpickledjins・@svintsandghosts・@nhyunn ・@liknws・@hotgorloikawa・@randomwimp・@automaticpersonabatpaper・@aceofvernons・@linos-kitten・@newhope8・@weedforthoughtz・@hyunverse

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cy-cyborg · 9 months

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Tips for writing and drawing Wheelchair using characters: Your character's wheelchair can tell us a lot about them

When you first start learning character design, you'll often be told something to the effect of "use your character's outfit to tell us more about them" - and this same principles can be applied to a disabled character's mobility aids.

Mobility aids like wheelchairs, to many disabled people, are a part of us. They can be an extension to a person's body and chances are, if you're going to be using this piece of equipment every day for the foreseeable future (or at least for a good amount of time for the foreseeable future), it's going to start reflecting some aspects of your personality, your interests, your passions, especially when you remember, a lot of people get their wheelchairs custom built for them.

You can use your character's wheelchair to tell us a lot about them without ever needing to show/describe them directly.

Let me show you two examples:

Take a look at these two wheelchairs. they're similar in shape and build, but still pretty different to each other. Can you make some guesses about their users based only on what's shown here?

intended answers below:

Please note, the following points are all generalisations and the real world is rarely this simple. This is to demonstrate how to use disability aids to contribute to your character's design, not how to make assumptions about real people in real life.

So here are some similarities between the chairs:

Both wheelchairs have ridged frames, this means the wheelchair can't be folded in any way. These kinds of chairs can imply a few different things depending on the person. They are typically lighter, sturdier and more durable, and indicate the person probably will be using the wheelchair for a long time and/or has the money to get something built to last (or lives in a place where cost not an issue due to universal/subsidised access to healthcare). They are also typically better to travel with when flying, as they are less likely to be broken by airport security/staff.

Both wheelchairs also lack anti-tip wheels, which are a third set of wheels that extend from the back of the chair. Them not being present could indicate the person is likely pretty confident in their ability to use the chair without worrying about tipping out. It could also indicate they are in an environment where the anti-tips could be more of a hazard than a help, such as on rough terrain.

So lets look at some specifics for the green wheelchair:

Take a look at the wheels. The front wheels are pretty small and appear to be solid, while the back wheels appear to be quite narrow (compared to the orange chair anyway). This indicates the user likely lives somewhere with decent accessibility like a (well funded) city where they are unlikely to encounter unpaved/dirt roads/grass. Small front wheels and thin back wheels are good for manoeuvrability and a smooth ride over even terrain, but they will get stuck as soon as bumps appear, so this probably isn't an issue for this person.

While its a bit hard to tell unless you have seen other similar wheelchairs, this wheelchair is very long in the front, meaning the footplate and front wheels are further away from the seat than most. There could be a few reasons for this. One either indicates the person has very long legs, or a lack of motion in their knees, making it harder to bend their legs. This is moves the chair's centre of gravity forward by a decent amount, making it harder to tip back, which could indicate the person's legs are very light. You tend to see this most often in the wheelchairs of bilateral leg amputees, who are at a greater risk of tipping backwards due to a lack of weight at the front of the chair (even if they wear their prosthetics).

The colour of the chair is bright. This could simply be the character's favourite colour, or maybe this colour has some significance to them?

There are stickers on the side of the chair relating to the Paralympics. This could indicate the person is a fan, or perhaps had some involvement in the games?

The wheelchair has handles on the back, but they are able to be folded down. This is a popular feature for people who are independent enough to go out on their own, but still want to have the option for some help. folding down the handles also deters random strangers from grabbing at you (an unfortunately common experience for wheelchair users).

There is some mild paint scratching to the front of the wheelchair, but nothing too noticable. This is typical of older chairs and people who are a little rough on their chairs. Maybe they've had a few stacks and falls throughout the years, probably going a decent speed.

Ok, now let's look at the orange chair

This wheelchair has very large, inflatable front wheels, and very thick back wheels. This will make the chair slower and less manoeuvrable on flat/even surfaces, but much, much easier to push on rough terrain. This is supported by the amount of mud on the wheelchair.

The seat on this wheelchair tilts upwards slightly. This is called a bucket (or according to an old basketball teammate of mine, a dump-truck lol). This is a feature you typically see in wheelchairs made for people with spinal injuries who are unable to move their legs and engage their lower bodies or core to help keep them stable.

The back of this chair is very low, indicating that if this wheelchair user has a spinal injury, it's probably pretty low on their spine, likely fairly close to the hips, making the person a low-level paraplegic. Higher-level paraplegics and quadriplegics usually need a higher back to help support them and keep them from flopping over, since all the muscles below their place where their spine broke either doesn't work, or is significantly weaker. Higher backs though can get in the way of pushing and reduce mobility, so people who need less support will likely opt for a lower back rest.

This wheelchair has no handles, which indicates the user is probably very independent and doesn't need a lot of help getting around.

The paint on this wheelchair is very scratched up, showing the person is very tough on their wheelchair and doesn't care to get the paint touched up.

This wheelchair has no breaks. This is very common on chairs with larger tiers as they don't tend to be as effective, but also on many outdoor wheelchairs, for two reasons. One is because they are made for rough terrain, so chances are, you aren't going to go far without a big push to get you moving. The second reason is that to get over large bumps and obsticals in a wheelchair, it can be helpful to do very large pushes using the top and front of the wheel. When pushing a normal chair, most people will only use the top section of the wheel to push since it's closest, but these big pushes that use the front of the wheel make it easier to push, since you can benefit from downwards momentum. However, this is also where the breaks are located on most wheelchairs, which can create a hazard. I've lost entire fingernails by them getting snagged on the breaks when pushing this way. So if you live somewhere where the breaks are not going to be helpful to you often, it makes sense to not get them.

And here are the characters who own these wheelchairs

The owner of the green wheelchair is an amalgamation of a few people I knew from when I played wheelchair basketball. They're a bilateral leg amputee, and judging by their outfit (The Official National Wheelchair Basketball uniform for Australia), they're an elite athlete. This wheelchair is not the one they play sport in, but it still needs to be durable enough to withstand the rough treatment of airport staff when traveling, as well as heavy day-to-day use that comes with being an active person. While it needs to be rough, the person also seemed to want to prioritise speed and manoeuvrability, and likely doesn't need to worry about rough terrain too much, so they probably live in a major city.

The owner of the orange chair was inspired by a family friend of mine. They live on a farm, and need a chair that can handle life in those conditions, rough terrain and all. This comes at the cost of speed and manoeuvrability on smoother terrain, but honestly, anyone who's lived in the country knows you won't find many of those around there anyway, so that's not too big of a sacrifice. They are paraplegic, are very confident in their ability to use their wheelchair, and probably doesn't need help too often, but still benefit from some extra stability support from the raised seat on their chair.

Conclusion

Once again, these are generalisations, and in real life there are always exceptions, but I hope this helped demonstrate what I meant when I said you can use your character's wheelchair to tell us more info about them if you're smart about it.

I originally planned to do a whole series of these, showing a wider variety of wheelchairs and the people who they belong to, but I guess I kind of forgot because they've been sitting, abandoned on my hard drive for the last 2 years 😅. If that's something you folks would be interested in seeing though, let me know, I'd happily revive the series lol.

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writingwithcolor · 6 months

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A Careful Balance: Portraying a Black Character's Relationship with their Hair

@writingraccoon said:

My character is black in a dungeons and dragons-like fantasy world. His name is Kazuki Haile (pronounced hay-lee), and his mother is this world's equivalent of Japanese, which is where his first name is from, while his father is this world's equivalent of Ethiopian, which is where his last name is from. He looks much more like his father, and has hair type 4a. I plan to make his character very finnicky about his hair, both enjoying styling it, but also often being unsure how to style it (not in that he doesn't know how to, but has so many options for how to style it, he has trouble choosing). However, I know that there are some very harmful ways to write black hair, especially in regards to how the black character themselves feels about it. Kazuki does not hate his hair, in fact he takes joy in it, and I'm researching black hair and hair styles to be as accurate as possible. But I'm unsure if portraying a black character as occasionally overwhelmed by or vain about his hair is negative. How would you suggest either changing this or making it work? Does it need to be changed in the first place?

Black Character Overwhelmed by Curly Afro Hair

Your Black character wanting his hair to look its best and at times feeling overwhelmed seems reasonable and natural to me. It appears their challenge comes with how to style it. Not so much with struggling how it looks or how hard it is to manage. That is good, as this further helps avoid placing a strong negative focus on Black hair.

Him caring a lot about how it is style should not be deemed vain or frivolous, either. In any case, hair care is self care. There’s nothing wrong with having pride with your hair, especially hair that mainstream society, historically and present, might say is not beautiful. This still matters, even in a fantasy world, since your readers still exist in this reality. It’s empowering and a welcome change to see someone who loves their afro hair, actually.

There are unique factors someone with coily afro hair would experience vs. straight, wavy, or looser curls, but people struggling with their hair (too frizzy, too flat, too limp, too thin, too thick!) is universal.

There is a delicate balance to achieve.

Avoid Writing a Black Hair Journey Experience

An overall negative Afro hair journey might be the reality for many, especially when society deems Afro hair as unacceptable and slaps so many uninvited opinions, laws and policies over its existence and on certain styles (again, historically and very much at present), but that’s the kind of story that is best handled by someone with the background. Someone willing to commit to the research might also be able to pull it off, although it’s truly not the kind of thing an escapism novel needs in my opinion. If the story is not meant to delve into “A Black /Black Hair Experience” then I'd avoid going that route. That is moving a bit towards a struggle narrative, depending on how much it defines your character’s story.

Add positive and neutral hair language and interactions

For your writing, I’d avoid using unchallenged negative language about his hair. Being overwhelmed at times and frustrated is one thing and expected. If his hair is constantly brought up, and is associated with uncontrollable, ugly, or too [insert struggle here], then rethink the direction you’re going.

Add some positive or neutral terms, reactions, and interactions in the narrative towards afro hair, such as describing color and texture.

“His fine coils bounced in the wind.”

“Hair black and shiny”

“She wore her hair in two large, fluffy buns.”

“He admired his fresh, neat braids in the mirror, smiling at his reflection, before turning to leave.”

Another tip: It may have been for research purposes, but leave out any hair number categorizing in the story and rely on description. I’d say this goes for any story, as reading the number would feel off.

“He had coily 4a hair.” Nahh! :P

Also, I would suggest sending all passages that focus on his hair to a Black sensitivity reader for review.

More reading:

~Mod Colette

#asks #black #black hair #hair #afro hair #description #tragedy exploitation #struggle novel #creator responsibility #representation #guides #writeblr

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fastandcarlos · 10 days

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Playing With His Hair » F1 Reaction

» Max Verstappen

As the night crept in, feeling you play with his hair was often the sign that Max needed to know that you were starting to crave attention. Usually, you’d begin to play with his hair just next to his headset, almost as if to tell him you wanted him to take it off so that he could spend time with you. Max would try and resist it for as long as possible, but eventually he would succumb and take his headset off so that he could feel your hands mess through his full head of hair, much to his satisfaction too.

» Lando Norris

Lazy fingers glance effortlessly through Lando’s hair as the two of you struggle to stay awake, talking in the smallest of whispers to one another. During the long season you worried a lot about Lando and his lack of sleep; if there was one thing that did the trick, it was playing with his hair. You loved when his hair was messy, falling slightly in front of his face, unable to tear your eyes away. As much as he tried to fight it, feeling your fingers over the top of his head was often the magic that Lando needed to finally fall asleep.

» Carlos Sainz

Wet hair is dangerous for you, as you watch Carlos shake his head, water spraying everywhere, you can’t help but hurry across to fix it for him. To begin with, you thought Carlos put up with you, but after so many years you knew now that he did it on purpose, loving whenever you offered to help him out. A wide, cheeky grin would appear on his face as soon as he stepped out of the shower, almost tilting towards your body as if to tell you that he was there and he was desperate for some attention from you.

» George Russell

The finishing touches of you playing with his hair were always appreciated by George. As you watched him fixing his hair ready for yet another press event, his huffs told you that things just weren’t quite right and didn’t meet his high standards. So, in stepped you. Before he tormented himself any further, you’d be there to fix his hair, making sure that every last detail was perfect. You played with the curled strands until they sat perfectly on top of his head, twirling round to show George his reflection and see the smile of appreciation slowly creep onto his face.

» Charles LeClerc

There’s no greater feeling for Charles than the feeling of your fingers dancing through his hair when you noticed him getting stressed as a result of work. You can tell by the look on his face when he needs you there to play with his hair, to curl around some of the loose strands and tug gently through some of the knots that tie up underneath his heavy helmet. Despite how frustrated he may be, he can’t help but let his smile grow as he allows his head to relax into the feeling of your palm against the side of him.

» Pierre Gasly

If there was one thing you were not to touch with Pierre, it was his hair, but that was the exact reason why you loved to do it. Whenever he passed you by, you’d try to reach out and ruffle your hand through his hair to mess it up, much to Pierre’s dislike. He was on edge every time that he was near you, ready to swat your hand away as soon as you tried to reach out to get him, sending you a warning with his glare, despite the fact his face still had a wide smile on it.

» Lewis Hamilton

Lewis loved you playing with his hair whenever you were there to help him out with a new style, attempting any idea that he came to you with. He’d show you a photo of some braids or an updo that he had found that he wanted to try out, and you were always the person he relied on to make his masterpiece come to life. He’d sit down between your legs, leaning his head back slightly, happy to sit peacefully for as long as you needed him too whilst you played with his hair and gave him a new do.

» Alex Albon

You would always be there to play with Alex’s hair, whenever it was freshly washed, and particularly if it just had a new colour put in it too. You loved the bounce in his hair whenever he dried it with the towel; unable to resist the temptation that was in front of you. Alex knew you were coming, he would sit and expect you as you jumped into his lap and began twirling your fingers round a small amount of Alex’s hair. He would try to seem unbothered, but deep down you playing with his hair was one of Alex’s favourite things in the world.

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sukunasteeth · 25 days

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Insomnia

You had always had trouble sleeping.

As a child, you would wander the house in search of something to do, as a teenager you utilized it for spending countless nights painting the town red with your childhood best friend Yuji, but, as an adult, you find yourself spending more and more nights sitting in front of the window, waiting for the sun to rise in a peaceful quiet.

The view was always better from your partner Sukuna’s apartment. Tucked into the very top of a complex that scraped against the sky, the city stretched out before his ceiling length windows like an endless mirage of glittering light. Looking out of them, you would never know it was three o’clock in the morning. The city still bustled, people the size of ants crossed the main streets below you in swathes of different walks of life; business men lost to highballs with too much whiskey, friends on their way to the next nightclub, shop workers calling to anyone with a pulse on the sidewalk. It was a perfect people-watching spot and a perfect distraction from the nightmare replaying in your head like a broken record.

You’re sitting on the cold tile floors of his living room, curled up in a blanket you had taken from the arm of the couch. You’re positive Sukuna had never used it before and that it’s always been a decoration before you had arrived. Now, it was part of your nightly routine when Sukuna had you over to unfold it and curl in, while you spent countless hours drifting off in your own mind waiting for morning.

It wouldn’t be long before Sukuna was up now, he had a meeting at seven o’clock in the morning that day. The two of you hadn’t gone to sleep until around midnight, naked and content. You wished you could sleep as deeply as he had been when you carefully crawled out of his bed half an hour ago, but you had accepted your insomnia by now. You found ways to live with the burden of it, and you had long since made friends with the silence and peace of nightfall.

You always did feel guilty when Sukuna was affected by it. Like tonight, when your ears catch the door to his bedroom clicking open and you hear his bare feet against the tile approaching the living room.

Your heart momentarily skips a beat. You think about hiding- sprinting into the bathroom as an excuse for your late night absence from his bed, but he makes it into the threshold of the living room before you get a chance to decide.

Despite the guilt washing over you like a bucket of cold water, your heart still warms at the sight of him. He’s slipped into a pair of sweats to come find you and is still in the middle of putting on a tank top when he appears, sleepy and squinting against the light of the city signs glaring in. His hair is still a mess from your fingers pulling on it before bed, which somehow makes him even more heart wrenching to look at. Even when his eyes find you on the floor, and he immediately frowns you’re still starstruck by his sleep drunk appearance.

“Why are you so good at that?” His voice is thick with sleep, but he talks to you as though you were just in the middle of a conversation.

You tilt your head at him, peering over your shoulder in confusion. “Good at what?”

“Leaving without waking me.” He scratches at the back of his head, yawning as he makes his way across the room to come stand beside you. One of his hands sweeps down his face, like he’s trying to wipe away his clear exhaustion.

“It’s no easy task.” You admit, hoping your innocent smile is enough for him not to push any further. He stares down at you for a moment, searching your eyes reflecting in the neon of the city line.

He huffs through his nose when he doesn’t find what he’s looking for, muttering to himself as he plops down beside you and folds his legs into a cross-legged position. He’s close enough that his side is flush against yours, his knee resting over top of your own, grounding you. “So stubborn.” You hear him say.

As if it were second nature, you immediately rest your head against his shoulder and his arm comes around your waist in turn, scooting you even closer to him. The two of you fit together perfectly by now. Constantly trading off between who was yin and who was yang, but always in equilibrium when you were side by side.

“I need to get you a bell.” He murmurs against the shadows of his living room.

You chuckle, “Yeah? Gonna collar me?” You’re just poking fun, but when you peek up at him expecting him to be chuckling too, you find his eyes honed in on your neck, like he’s considering it.

He doesn’t give you an answer to that one, but you can see it in his eyes that your joke has been taken as a suggestion to be logged away for future use. You bury your face into his shoulder, feeling your cheeks burning in embarrassment.

You don’t take it back.

The two of you sit like that for a while, allowing Sukuna’s presence to diffuse the unease from your haunting dreams. He doesn’t have to do much to comfort you. When Sukuna was beside you, comfort was a given. He joins you in silent people-watching, his hand protectively curled over your backside as though he can feel the nightmares lingering just out of his sight.

After a while, he squeezes you to catch your attention, but doesn’t ask you to pull away from your resting place against him.

He turns his head to press his lips into your temple, and the way he whispers your name then has you convinced you’d tell him any secret you promised you’d take straight to the grave. “Why are we awake?” He asks.

“I couldn’t sleep.” You whisper back, as though you were afraid that the nightmares would hear you and realize they had won.

Sukuna takes a few seconds breathing in your scent, patiently waiting for you to give him more information. He hums in disappointment when it’s clear that that’s all you were willing to share at the moment.

“Suppose I didn’t work you hard enough last night.”

It’s a joke. Such an obvious one that you can’t help but let out a laugh despite your thoughts weighing heavily.

“Please,” You plead in a groan, “I barely made it to the living room without crawling on my hands and knees.” This was not a joke. Your legs shook like jello the moment you were on your feet and they ache with the memory of overexertion even when you're sitting.

“I do love you on your hands and knees.” Another suggestion that you can tell he’s logged away for future use. At this point you were doing it to yourself.

You still don’t take it back, though.

“Let’s see,” He clears his throat and his voice takes a different cadence now, no longer conscientious of the time of night… or day rather. “The last time you had a nightmare and I caught you out here, you asked me to make you pancakes. I think I still have the mix in the cupboard…”

You freeze up against him, your head moving mechanically upwards until you’re face to face with him. The man who reads you like a book. When you’ve tried so hard to stay shut up. When you’ve worked your entire life at achieving the perfect poker face. Time and time again he proves to you that it’s useless when he’s got your soul tucked away in his hold, yet, it never stops surprising you.

Sukuna tilts his head, smiling like you’ve confirmed his suspicions with just one glance. “What? You think I don’t know that much, at the very least? How aloof you are~”

He takes the opportunity to scoop your hair away from your shoulder and tuck a few strands behind your ears so that he can see your sleep deprived face clearly. At the same moment, his free hand reaches over and finds yours in the blankets.

He's smug with your shock.

“How long are you going to try to hide from me?”

“I’m not hiding…” You whisper, even your own voice cannot bear to lie to him. He makes a warning noise, leaning closer like he can tell.

“One day I’ll know it all. Every secret you want to keep from me. Every dream you’re too shy to tell me.” His mere proximity is enough to scramble your mind. The way his lips play just out of your reach, the way his nose brushes yours ever so slightly, the way his thumb presses into your ring finger, all of it has your focus split into too many incapacitating directions. “Your burdens. Your nightmares. All mine to bear.”

You don’t doubt him. It’s yourself that you find apprehensive to trust. Convinced that your own mind was going to torture you with him there or not. You had spent years battling insomnia alone, and while you hated to deny him, you hated to get your own hopes up too.

“You can’t scare away all my nightmares, my love.”

"Hmm, is that right?” Sukuna lifts your hand to his face, presses it against his lips, and places a kiss to the very center of your palm. It's almost as sweet as his next words, “Sounds like I'll just have to give you so many good dreams you’ll forget about the bad ones, then.”

You wonder if you looked as awestruck as you felt in that moment.

He’s won. He knows he’s won. You can tell by that prideful toothy grin you feel him hiding behind your hand, the one you can see in the curve of his eyes.

The way your heart climbs into your throat, like it’s desperate to be home in the palm of his hands, has you instantly knowing that you were truly a hopeless cause at this point.

“When did you become so soft and sweet?”

Sukuna laughs under his breath, “When I found out that’s just how you like it.” He answers easily, like he’s asked himself the same question before.

“Now, do you want the pancakes or not?”

Before you can remind him that he has a meeting in only a few hours, before you can assure him that you weren’t thinking of food at three o’clock in the morning, your stomach releases a growl that’s begging for Sukuna’s undivided attention.

He snorts, not even bothering to wait for a verbal answer before he’s maneuvering to his feet, still grasping your hand gently in his own.

“Come sit pretty on the counter for me.” He tugs you. “It’s cold out here.”

You don't think you've ever felt warmer.

#jjk #sukuna #ryomen sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #jjk x you #jjk fluff #sukuna slept like a rock before you came along #now he knows what an empty bed feels like #he makes you coffee every morning #and gets offended when you try to make it yourself

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nichuuu · 6 months

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Beats Me - 6: Come As You Are

Word count: 8k+

Of course, there’s a chance to turn away from all of this—a chance to stop her hand as it reaches the base of your shaft, a chance to halt her in the midst of tiptoeing to place a peck on your neck; there’s a clear opportunity for you to end what’s happening right here and now—it’s all a matter of how willing you are to go through with this. While your brain screams at you to stop, your body says otherwise; you lift a hand to cup her cheek.

As you tell her, “Just for tonight,” a wisp of a smile appears on her face, and you wonder, What am I doing.

---------

A call from Kim Minju at this hour is never good news.

To give context: It’s one in the morning on a Saturday. Office workers and the youth above the legal age for drinking are patronising drinking spots, throwing back a couple of beers and basking in the euphoria that alcohol brings them. Perhaps they're using alcohol to cope with the stress of their lives, or maybe they're trying to numb the pain of recent difficult experiences. In both cases, emotions are running high, alcohol is coursing through their systems, memories are resurfacing, and maybe, just maybe, tears are streaming down their cheeks—nothing too out of the ordinary. If you were to receive a call from anyone else at this hour, you would've thought it a request to be escorted back home, or a soused friend dialling in to say incomprehensible things before truncating the call.

But for more context: Kim Minju has been the bearer of bad news since highschool. If you are to combine this with the information above, you know that something has probably gone down, and you’re the only man she can trust to help them. She never calls you on a whim; every call from her is a desperate cry for help.

As you stare at her caller ID on your phone that vibrates on the table like it’s possessed, you start steeling yourself for what is to come. You’re hesitant to answer, but basic human decency gets the better of you. You can hear the deafening roar of club music in the background when you pick up, and Minju’s yelling into the phone. Even in the quiet of your apartment, you can’t make heads or tails of what she’s trying to convey to you. Even as you holler I can’t hear you at the top of your lungs, she continues to blabber her intelligible words over the pulsing bass of that horrible song that’s playing in the background.

Then it suddenly gets quiet on the other end, and for a moment, you only hear the sound of your heartbeat crunching in your ears. When Minju speaks again, you can hear the wind blowing by in the background, your indication that she’s exited the club. Her voice rings loud and clear in your apartment.

“Eunbi’s driving to your place, she’ll explain everything,” she’s telling you. “She’ll text when she arrives, get ready to be picked up.”

The urgency in her voice drives you to acquiescence, and you throw on a hoodie and some sweatpants. Couple of minutes later, you’re seated in the front seat of your singer’s car. She’s running you down on the events that have occurred tonight, and the multiple mentions of Chaewon makes your heart sink further and further.

It was enough dealing with her in the band. That shrill frequency she could produce with that trumpet was often aptly used to deafen you whenever she could (she sat on your direct right so she could be a bitch with ease). The bowl she used to collect her saliva was often “accidentally” (the way she said that word with such bogus innocence really brought you to your boiling point sometimes) spilt on to the leg of your jeans when you walked by, her trumpet case “coincidentally” (again, bogus innocence with this one) be in the way of your shin as you tried to get to your kit. Her behaviour wasn’t the culprit behind your irritance towards her, rather the fact that her behaviour failed to reflect what she had requested for when the two of you schismed—a clean break.

“She’s thrown up twice now.” Eunbi’s tone is a mish-mash of frustration and commiseration, “She refuses to move, and she's been groped twice. We don’t mean to drag you into this, but you’re the last feasible option.”

There’s an odd feeling of nihility in your chest as the two of you come to a stop at a red light. In the band, you dealt with her on a physical level. But when Kim Chaewon and alcohol merge, you know that you’ll have to deal with her on an emotional level, and that somehow fails to engender any spite or frustration of the ilk. The silence that hangs in the car is unsettling in light of the confusing sensations you’re experiencing (and also due to the fact that usually chatty Eunbi is finding it hard to start a conversation in this atmosphere), yet you find that you’re poised.

“I’m uh… I’m actually your highschool senior,” Eunbi decides to input, “I used to go to the same school as you, Chaewon and Minju…”

You remain reticent. Eunbi takes the cue and returns her eyes to the road.

The bouncer almost didn’t let you in because of your shabby fit, but a quick wink and a, he’s with me, from Eunbi was enough to get him to let you through. You easily spot Minju amidst club-goers once you get in. Those long, luscious jet black locks that flow just past her shoulders and those large round eyes that always seem to be doleful quickly catch your attention as you wade through the sea of people together with Eunbi. She looks the same as she did all those years ago. She stands when you approach; Kim Chaewon’s slumped over the table they’re at.

“Thank god you’re here.” Her expression tells you that she’s been through quite the ordeal tonight. “I… I hope you understand that—”

She stops mid sentence when you hold up a hand. You understand that such a gesture is impertinent of you, but you can’t help it—there’s too much to process, too much to take in, and a club isn’t the best place to assimilate it all (or to find a lover, an ex lover in this case). Minju steps aside, and you take a moment to look at the sorry sight of your ex—face down on the table of the booth seat and an empty shot glass in hand.

“What do you want me to do?” you ask them. The two girls look at each other, then Minju tells you to do whatever it takes to get her out of here.

So there you are—contemplating on whether you should dump a bucket of ice on her or gently wake her up. Basic human decency gets the better of you, and you slide onto the couch next to Chaewon, gently tap the bare shoulder that’s exposed in her outfit. When she raises her head off the sticky, glossy table, you’re momentarily reminded of the countless times you’d woken her up in the same way when she fell asleep in the school library.

Then those eyes—half-lidded and swimming in tears—lock onto yours. The volume of her voice pales in comparison to the blaring House remix of the Barbie theme, yet when she calls your name, it’s the only thing you can hear. She shifts closer—close enough to rest her head on your shoulder, close enough for you to smell the vodka on her breath as she silently sobs against you; Don’t go, don’t leave, she slots in between those heart wrenching cries. Right now: emotions are running high, alcohol is coursing through her system, memories are resurfacing, and tears are definitely streaming down their cheeks.

Eunbi and Minju look on in silence. Eunbi’s lips are pursed, Minju’s eyes are somehow more doleful. Their looks are doing nothing to assuage the turmoil that you’re feeling. You find yourself saying things that you were never prepared to say.

“She can stay at my place for the night… I doubt she’d want to go anywhere else.”

They look apprehensive, but deep down—they know you’re right.

***

“Uh… Are you sure you want to present this?”

Chaewon looks up from her presentation script to give a simple, “Hm?”. You were scratching your head as you read over the vivid description of Kurt Cobain's death that she’d included. It detailed the nature of his death, the brutal imagery of small, tiny shotgun pellets blowing a hole through the skull of Nirvana’s frontman on the night of his suicide described in an unnaturally calm tone, as if people shooting themselves through the head with a shotgun was an everday occurance.

“I mean…” You were doing your best to not sound reprehensive, “I don’t think Miss Kim would appreciate the… Visceral imagery.”

Her look was one of innocence as she asked, why not, and proceeded to further justify her vivid depiction (her argument was that Lee Chaeyeon had presented on Aviccii’s death in equal vividness and your teacher enjoyed it). The theme of the presentations for the week was “the talented die young”, and she’d decided to talk about one of her favourite bands at the time. She was blasting their hit song Smells Like Teen Spirit through the speaker in her room, and you were finding it hard to focus over all that grunge (you didn’t tell her of course, cause that would’ve made her pouty for the rest of the day).

That was one of your fondest memories from dating her. It showed you her tenacity and her stubbornness in insisting that she was correct. It showed you just how determined and strong-willed she could be. You found that you could still recall every detail of that moment as vividly as she described Cobain's death while you watched her walk around your kitchen from the doorway to your room. Her hair is in disarray, the set of clothes that you’d passed her baggy on her slender frame. For the record: She knows how she got here, she knows where she is, she knows you’re awake, and she knows that you’re watching her. In spite of all this, her movements are calm, her hand taking its time to trail across your cabinets as her eyes slowly soak in her surroundings.

“You know, for someone that said that they wanted a clean break—you’re making things messier than they should be,” you can’t help but tell her. Her hand stops on the handle of your cabinet, her index finger affixing itself there for a minute as she lowers her head. With a sigh, you stuff your hands into your pockets and tell her, “Get out once your hangover wears off.”

You retreat back into your room to get some work done. When you emerge around lunchtime, you find that she’s taken liberties in your kitchen, a piping hot bowl of noodles sitting opposite her at your dining table as she silently slurps on a bowl of her own. You stand there for a moment, then you accost the eating space and stop just before her.

“Are you being for real?” You can’t help but let the revulsion seep into your words, “You’re telling me that your hangover has lasted this long?”

She’s unwontedly silent. Her pugnacious, bratty nature seems to have dissipated into thin air, replaced by one of taciturn and timidness as she stares blankly into her noodles. She doesn’t look up when you sigh and slide into the other seat, nor does she say anything when you start digging into the noodles that she’s prepared for you (you aren’t one to pass up on a free meal, even if it’s prepared by your ex).

It’s when you're halfway through your bowl that she finally pipes up, “thank you for taking me in.”

You go still for a moment.

Then you choose not to reply to her.

After washing up, you communicate to her that she has till sundown to leave your abode before you head back to your room. You know that she’s going to stay like that stubborn patch of mould beneath the snare drum in the recording studio when you hear her playing Smells Like Teen Spirit on her phone through the door. Once again, that damn song is reminding you of how tenacious and stubborn she can be. Those two traits of hers were really double edged swords for that woman.

Night comes; she still hasn’t left. When you exit your room, you find that she’s asleep on the floor. It seems that she’s found it congenial to sleep on the carpeted surface, even though the futon that you provided her last night is literally an arms length away from her sleeping body. Seeing her that way, you’re momentarily reminded of the times she’d stay over at your place while you were dating, and she’d choose to nap on the floor while you worked—even though the bed was empty. The reasons as to why she chose to do so are still unknown to this day—one of the many unsolved mysteries in your relationship, second only to why she’s being the way she is despite what the two of you have previously agreed on.

To be absolutely clear: the two of you know why you broke up. It wasn’t a case of a one-sided sudden change of heart; there was a reason behind it that you both understood (even though you did need a lot of time to come to terms with it). Yes, it was painful. Yes, it was unexpected. Yes, you did miss her for quite some time. But there wasn’t much you could do about it. She’d set her mind on the breakup, and her stubbornness and tenacity had her on wits end when you tried to talk to her.

Was there a possibility the two of you could’ve stayed together? Your answer—yes. Her’s—only God knows what goes through that confusing brain.

Once more, basic human decency drives you to do things you don’t want to, and you end up cooking a share of fried rice for her. You lay her bowl next to her on the floor along with a spoon before seating yourself at the dining table to eat. You’re about halfway through a video essay about some game you’ll never play when she stirs from her slumber.

She spots the bowl, then her gaze wanders to you. Silently, she picks it up and rises to her feet. Now it’s her turn to accost the eating space, except she isn’t belligerent, nor can you sense any hostile intentions.

“Can I sit?” She’s oddly genteel as she points at the chair opposite you. You’ll just end up sitting even if I say no, is your reply. She allows a soft, short chuckle before she slides in. You think about turning off the video essay, but then you decide to not let basic human decency get the better of you this once.

So with some random guy’s voice filling the air, you and Chaewon partake in your meals in silence. You try not to look at her, but you can’t help but throw a few glances her way as she eats. She decided to grow out her hair over the past few weeks, dye it auburn, and now it drapes elegantly past her shoulders like silky curtains. You can’t read her expression (though you never could to begin with), and you certainly can’t understand why she’s become so quiet. She’s trying to make you lower your guard, soften you up then launch some manipulation tactic is what you’re considering. You won’t put it past her to use a facade of milquetoast nature to try and break past your boundaries.

“I’ll be out by tomorrow morning,” she suddenly tells you. That was the first time you tore your gaze away from your phone for more than five seconds. How would one normally reply to such a statement? Oh, okay, seems to be one of the better options, yet you choose to go with, “Good, cause I’m not planning to overstay your welcome.”

Chaewon plucks a rice grain off her top lip. “But you’d let Eunbi or Ryujin stay, right?”

There you were, hoping that she’d be as timid and quiet as she’d been for the rest of the day. The nap must have gotten rid of the rest of the hangover, cause you can hear the haughtiness in her voice.

“Are we really going to have this conversation?” you ask her. The firm look she fixes you with tells you, I’m gonna run my mouth on you whether you like it or not.

“And here I was thinking you’re being a decent human for once,” you can’t help but mutter. “You’re fucking confusing you know that?”

She bristles in her seat. “You watch your fucking mouth player.”

You’re not one to take offence from such comments. Normally, you’d understand that in the heat of the moment, people can say hurtful things that they don’t mean. It’s natural, completely natural—the adrenaline, the emotions, the tension… All of it can melt together in the form of nasty words that spew forth from a person’s mouth.

But when it comes from Kim Chaewon’s mouth however… You can’t seem to find that sympathy in you. She knows that you’ve slept with your singer and bassist, she knows that they’ve had you more than once—it’s right for her to feel this type of anger (even though the two of you aren’t even together anymore), yet there’s no part of you—not even a single atom—that wants to take the time to try to understand where she’s coming from and why she feels this way.

“Player?” You don’t mean to sound as pissed as you do. “Player?” you echo again, just for good measure, “What gives you the right to call me that? I’m not the one who couldn’t wait for their partner!”

“It was two years!” Chaewon cries.

“Well you could’ve at least tried.” You’re not even bothering to filter your words now. “You’re a hypocrite for calling me a player when you couldn’t even wait for me.”

“Two fucking years! Do you really expect me to close my heart to love for two whole years just so I can wait for you to get out of the damn military!” The way her tone conveys how right she thinks she is pisses you off, “I’m a human! I need love! Do you really expect me to wait for it for that long?”

She’s on her feet now, hands on your table, breaths heavy.

She screams, “It’s your fault for signing on so early! It’s your fault for ever thinking that I’d wait!”

You shoot up from your seat and cry, “Well then damn me for ever trying to believe in you!”

Her face contorts into a snarl. She skirts the table, accosts you with her arm whizzing through the air; she slaps you across the face. As the sting lingers on your cheek, you find your fingers curling into fists.

“You’re horrible!” She’s hollering at the top of her lungs, “I wish that I never met you!”

For a moment, there’s only the sound of her heavy breathing. Then those eyes—bulging in their sockets and swimming in tears—lock onto yours. She looks just as she did the night the two of you broke up: hair slightly messy, face twisted in a mix of woe and fury, right up in your face as her face starts to flush under the intense assault of emotions and thoughts. She’s close—close enough to grip you by your collar and pull you towards her, crush her lips against yours, kiss you like she did when you were teens.

And she does just that.

A soft cry slips past her lips, travels into your mouth as she kisses you; It feels exactly the same as it did all those years ago—the meraki, the slight tension in her upper lip, the light quiver in your bottom lip—a familiar comfort you had no idea you missed. Her small waist is captured in your grasp, your face in her hands as she pulls you deeper, kisses you harder. It was like she never left, like she never walked away from you because you had decided to enlist in compulsory military service early so that you could get it over and done with, like she never said, seeing you on the weekends isn't enough for me, I’m sorry. This won’t work out the way you think it will. Let’s just end things off here, nice and clean.

And get this: the whole moment is sweet and all, but deep down, there’s still a small flame of anger alit within you. Even though you kissed her back with equal vigour, you were silently cursing her for making things messier than it had to be; while your hands run through her hair, you find yourself berating her in your head for making you vacillate between missing her and hating her. You aren’t one to be flippant, but Chaewon had the tendency to bring out sides of you that you’ve never seen for yourself.

Her tongue dives into your mouth, her hand pressed flat against your chest. She’s tugging at the fabric of your shirt, and you’re not sure if she’s trying to pull you closer or signalling for you to take it off. You realise it’s the latter when she guides you hand beneath the fabric of the shirt you gave her, your fingertips grazing the soft skin beneath it. Your palm rests on the flesh of her waist. Her skin was warm to the touch.

Your mouths part, and you’re quick to ask, What the hell are we doing. She takes a second to catch her breath, then she replies, “I have no clue, but I’m not stopping whatever’s coming next.”

Going with the flow—that was so her.

You grasp onto the hem of her shirt and gently pull upwards. She’s quick to respond, raising her hands above her head for ease of removal. Then her hands are on your waist band, tugging down at your shorts while your hands skim across her bare skin. She pulls your underwear down together with your shorts, lets them fall and pool around your ankles; her hand is quick to grasp onto your throbbing shaft.

“Chae.” You can’t help but whisper your pet name for her. She starts placing kisses on your clothed chest, her other hand resting on your shoulder while the hand on your cock begins to stroke it with consideration. She leans in and whispers, “Can we pretend like we never left each other? Just for tonight?”

A foolhardy request. She doesn’t know what she’s doing by asking this of you, nor does she care to consider the possibility that the fulfilment of this request can and will invoke unwelcome emotions in both of you. Of course, there’s a chance to turn away from all of this—a chance to stop her hand as it reaches the base of your shaft, a chance to halt her in the midst of tiptoeing to place a peck on your neck; there’s a clear opportunity for you to end what’s happening right here and now—it’s all a matter of how willing you are to go through with this. While your brain screams at you to stop, your body says otherwise; you lift a hand to cup her cheek.

As you tell her, “Just for tonight,” a wisp of a smile appears on her face, and you wonder, What am I doing.

Her hand on your dick leaves to join and assist the other in undoing her bra. She lets the intimate garment fall to the floor before her, her bare breasts on full display. She’s certainly grown more voluptuous as compared to her eighteen-year-old self, and with that change you find an increase in desire for this woman before you. Chaewon cups her tits with her hands, lifts them up, then lets go; she’s putting on a sordid show.

“Christ.” Christians certainly wouldn’t approve your usage of the name of their saviour in this abhorrent, impure context. “You’ve… Grown.”

“Puberty works wonders, no?” She’s taken on a playful tone, one that she was always fond of using while the two of you were dating. “Feel them. I know you want to.”

No sane man would ever turn down such an invitation. You can feel her erect peaks poking against your palms as your fingers close around the mounds; your breath hitches when you realise how firm they’ve become. Her hands join yours on her breasts, aiding you and squeezing and kneading while she lets a sigh leave her lips. Then in a whisper, she tells you how much she’s missed this feeling—your hands caressing her just the way she likes, your breath in her ears as you silently play with her like you used to.

Then she asks you, “Do you ever think about me when you fuck those other girls?”

You consider your words carefully. If you’re to be perfectly honest, there were a few times where the sight of Ryujin’s rippling ass cheeks made you think about her; sometimes the way Eunbi moaned reminded you of her.

But if you’re supposed to pretend like you never left her, some teasing would have to come into play.

“Depends.” You’re not even trying to hide how smug you are, “In what way are we talking?”

She gives you a look, one that says, you cheeky little fucker, but she plays along of course, offering a soft, Hm, as she pretends to go pensive.

Let’s see—she speaks as she (much to your chagrin) practically rips your hands off her body, all so that she can start circling you—Do their moans sound as cute as mine? Are their bodies as tight as mine?

She leans in to pop the final question: Do their pussies feel as good as mine?

For the record: No to the first one, a fifty-fifty between yes and no on the second one (they all had amazing bodies). As for the last question, you couldn’t say (not because you didn’t have an answer, but more because ranking them in terms of how good they feel would be doing all of them an injustice).

Dunno, is the answer you offer her, then you follow up with, “Why don’t we find out?”

She smirks and rolls her eyes. “Segueing—impressive.”

“I’m a laconic man,” you tell her, and, Oh shut the hell up, is her reply as she takes you by the hand and drags you to your room.

It’s crazy to think that just mere minutes ago, she was on her feet, yelling at you and telling you how odious she finds you; now, she’s on her back, her head propped up against a pillow, still yelling, but she’s telling how good you’re making her feel—Fuck, and, Oh shit is all that’s really leaving her mouth, but the message is implicit—as your tongue applies painfully slow strokes to her soaking pink folds. The hand that slapped you is now scrunching up in your hair, the palm that made your cheek sting pushing your head against her crotch while her toes curl into your mattress. You’re wondering if she’s intentionally pitching up her voice as she moans, or if she’s purposely dragging out her sighs, but it doesn’t take away from the utter sublimity of the act.

Chaewon’s slick is sweet; it’s tangier than Eunbi’s and tickles your taste buds better than Ryujin’s—you won’t tell her this of course, but it’s not like you’ll have time to communicate all of this while your head being shoved into her pussy. Believe it or not—this is one of the calmer moments of pussy-eating that you’ve experienced, one of the rare occasions where you actually have time to savour the taste of your partner, assimilate the intimacy of it, a far cry from when you were with Eunbi or Ryujin, where the goal was always to make them cum as fast as possible because that’s what they’re craving for. But believe it or not—even though her needy actions make it seem as if she’s desperately chasing her high, Chaewon’s really just trying to make the most of each and every swipe of your tongue, enjoying the way it skirts her clit and laps up her juices that leak out from her pretty, pink folds; all while she’s squeezing her thighs around your ears and begging you, Oh god, put your fingers in me.

You start with your index finger, using the pad of it to trace the outline of her pussy. Then—just to make sure that she knows that it’s going in too—you let your middle finger join the fray. Your digits graze the skin around her flushed lips, taking their time to cover ground while Chaewon’s reduced to a moaning, mewling mess. What you’re really trying to do here is test the limits of her patience, see how much teasing that small, tight body can really take before her will breaks. It’s a sadistic game you’re playing, but you know that she’s enjoying it as much as you are, even though she is practically screaming at you to stick your digits inside her already.

If there’s anything that this world has taught you, it’s that patience is often rewarding. In this case: Chaewon’s patience was rewarded with the fulfilment of her request. The moan that leaves her half-parted lips is one of satisfaction as you dig your digits into her waiting depths, and they soak in her juices for a minute or two before they start to explore. Her nails dig into your scalp when your fingers dig into the soft flesh on the roof of her pussy. Your name flies out from her lips in a tone of surprise, like she’s taken aback by the fact you remember the exact spot inside her that makes her tick. The smugness on your face says it all, really, and you start to stimulate that spot of sensitive flesh.

“Oh… Oh my… Oh…” She’s barely able to form the simplest of words. The pleasure you’re providing is racing through her body, filling her from head to toe with perverse need and taking over her bodily functions. You’re not doing anything fancy down there; your fingers are just wiggling against the same spot—a simple action that makes her body react in all sorts of complicated ways: twisting, trembling, twitching… It’s working wonders really. You’re amazed that she’s still as sensitive as ever.

“Look at you Chae,” you can’t help but deride. “You’re getting so fucking turned by fingers. I don’t remember you being this needy.”

Even if she’s hellbent on retorting, there’s no space for words to leave her mouth—the moans are filling the space in her throat, bottlenecking and filtering out of her mouth in the form of strained cries. From the limited view between her thighs, you make out the image of her biting down on the nail of her index finger. Meanwhile, the nails in your head dig deeper into your scalp, hardly caring for the fact that they may be drawing blood as their owner manages to beg, Keep going.

Your mouth—now rested enough to continue—rejoins the busy scene; the drawn-out guttural gasp that slides out of her mouth tells you all you need to know—Oh my god. You’re driving me crazy—and you can’t help but smile at the sight of her pleasure stricken face. Chaewon’s barely keeping it together at this point, the dignity that tightly wraps her body is slowly loosening—unravelling at the mercy of your mouth and fingers. The haughtiness, the sheer brattiness—crumbling under the sensations that overwhelm every fibre of her body; now that these perverse thoughts have entered your mind, you find that a dark part of you longs to own her, right here, right now. But of course, patience is rewarding.

You’re willing to wait.

To say that you’re taking your time to eat her out would be inaccurate. If you’re to be honest, it’s difficult to describe the pace you’re using. Inside of her, your index and middle finger move frenetically, as if you are using them to press the same key on a piano repeatedly to produce the same note—her moans. Outside her, your tongue’s movements are almost sluggish, the broad base of it dragging up her flushed lips before the tip flicks the swollen nub at the top. You’re fully invested, scrupulously ensuring the uniformity of your movements to drive Chaewon to perdition. The movements are neither simple nor complex, rather a middle ground between the two (but you do feel that it leans more towards the former), but it’s enough to drive her crazy. Even if she’s a complicated mess to deal with, deep down—she still enjoys some form of simplicity.

“Baby.” The way Chaewon’s calling you sends a shiver down your spine, stirring the emotions in your chest and letting some nostalgia bubble up from the depths of it, “I-I’m… I’m…”

Cumming, you complete just as her head violently whips back into the pillow. Then, in arguably the hottest ways possible, Kim Chaewon orgasms. Her thighs clamp around your head, becoming earmuffs as an onslaught of juices assail your mouth. You can hear her mewling past the flesh that surrounds your ears, and the muffled sound is enough to deluge your heart with depraved satisfaction while her body twitches, convulses and strains violently. The last vestiges of dignity that once enveloped her have fallen away, carried off by the sighs and cries escaping from her trembling lips, and as you lift your mouth of her soaking slit and withdraw your juice-slicked fingers, you know that she’s reached a point of no return.

Patience is truly so rewarding.

“Jesus…” she pants. Once again, believers probably wouldn’t approve of the usage of his name in this context, but something has to cleanse the filth from her body, “When did you get so good at this?”

“Always have been,” you grin. You can tell she wants to roll her eyes, but she hardly has the strength to do so. For a tender moment, you gaze into each other’s eyes and appreciate this moment of inexplicable intimacy, re-living the emotions that were once so present between the two of you. It’s just for tonight. After this, we’ll go back to fighting, you’re telling yourself, and it makes you want to stay like this for a little longer.

But when Chaewon flips herself over onto her belly, the warmth in your chest is shut out and replaced by warped desire. With the tender cheeks of her ass on full display, Chaewon wiggles her behind, inviting you to take your liberties with her body. You take a moment to admire how full they’ve become.

“Been working on it?” you ask her as you squeeze a handful of flesh.

“To the best of my ability,” is her reply, followed by, “you like it?”

Your reply is to deliver a soft spank to the right ass-cheek. She barely even yelps upon contact, a small grin on her face as she watches you spread the flesh apart to reveal her entrances. Then she urges you, “Come on now… Pick a hole, fuck it till you fill it with your cum.”

“What if I want both?” You can’t help but be a little cheeky. Chaewon’s bottom lip furls behind her front teeth.

“I’m not stopping you,” she whispers, “just promise me to cum in me.”

Not a trace of dignity in her words.

Alright, is what you tell her before your head slips inside of her pussy. You can pinpoint the exact moment where her body almost becomes the only thing to exist in your mind—it’s when those walls clamp down around your shaft, pulsing ever so slightly and still twitching from her orgasm, and it’s enough to make you clench all your muscles while you hilt yourself in her. The sigh you let out hardly synchronises with Chaewon’s gasp. Yet, you find that your thoughts are perfectly in sync as your hands grip onto her small waist, and she props herself up on her elbows and knees. Her hair falls off her back, cascading down her shoulders as she turns her head, catches your gaze to tell you—Own this pussy.

No more words need be said. Eagerly, you begin to pump yourself in and out of Chaewon’s slick, tight pussy, her body tightening around your cock with every thrust in and out, lathering your length with juices that glisten in the low light of your room. The sound of her sighs and gasps quickly rise in volume, a beautiful backdrop to the sounds of your wet shaft penetrating her slick pussy again and again.

You’ve already lost yourself in her from the moment you stuck your member into her, but you find your grasp on reality somehow slipping further and further with each thrust you make into that amazingly tight body. It’s the nostalgia—that feeling of being able to hold her again, the feeling of being able to fuck her like you did on those nights after you graduated high school, those nights where her parents weren’t home and she wanted you in ever way possible—that’s making you sink deeper and deeper into this new reality that is Kim Chaewon’s body.

Then her moans start once more; you give in to the carnal emotions that you’ve been doing a really bad job at suppressing, and almost at once, Chaewon becomes the only thing that matters. Her flesh suddenly feels softer than before, her moans and sighs and cries sounding closer and closer to a melody than a haphazard arrangement of notes, and when she rasps for you to fuck her harder, you’re quick to oblige.

Screw patience, you’re going to take what’s yours right here and now.

Your hands drift up from her waist, grip her shoulders and pull her till her body is almost upright. Your left hand slides down, wraps around her flat tummy; your right follows suit—you’re practically hugging her. Chaewon’s arms reach behind her, lock themselves around your neck and pull her face closer to yours. She doesn’t turn to kiss you—that’d take too much energy, energy that she would rather put into moaning—so you settle on capturing her earlobe between your lips, sucking on it softly while she starts to moan your name. Then, her confessions start.

I’ve missed this, I’ve missed you… Oh god, I fucking missed the way your cock stretched me out. So good… So fucking good… This pussy was made for your cock.

Those were just some of the many things you managed to make out. The words were hastily assembled, phonics loosely strung together, and then expelled from those beautiful pink lips in a precipitate manner. There were other things like: I love you, I fucking love you and Oh God I love you as well, but your tried not to make to much of it. Even though you’re lost in paradise, lost in her body, your subconscious is still actively fighting to keep her influence out of your head. Things are already messy—both figuratively and literally—as they are, and the last thing you need is to fall in love with memories of Chaewon while you’re fucking her in such a callous, unrelenting manner. Sex and alexithymia towards an ex is never a good combination—yet here you are, rearranging the insides of Kim Chaewon after agreeing to whatever it was you agreed to before you started (it’s not because you chose to forget, but because you truly can’t remember anything past the point where you stepped through the doorway to your bedroom).

You push away the thoughts (for now), letting them exit your body together with the growl that you release into her ear—Chaewon, why are you so fucking wet?—as your shaft continues to plunge itself between her slick, wet folds. The cheeks of her ass ripple deliciously with each strike of your crotch against hers, eliciting a raunchy exclamation from her body each time she hilts you to the base of your cock. You’re not going particularly fast—Chaewon suddenly has the capacity to reply, I’m always wet for you, baby—but you’re so utterly deep inside her that it’s driving the both of you to perverted elation. The position compromises your speed, but you know for a fact that Chaewon is more than happy to make the trade off, savouring the feel of every inch of you filling her insides at a considerate yet fervent pace.

“Baby.” Her pet name for you is really doing dangerous things to your feelings, “Harder. Let me feel all of you, just like last time.”

She turns her head to meet your gaze, and it’s only then that you see the tears streaming down her cheeks. Your best guess: just like how nostalgia has its effect on you, it's impacting her too. Her emotions are being dallied with, just as yours are. She’s feeling things that she can’t describe, and she doesn’t know if it’s the rock-hard meat drilling in and out of her that’s making her feel this way, or if it's the fact that she may very well be falling for you again. You may never fully comprehend the intricate workings of human emotions, but as you lean in and gently draw her lips to yours, you hope to help her make sense of her feelings.

Why does she always make things messier than they have to be, your asking yourself, all while her hand finds your left cheek, gripping it tightly as your lips part and she whispers, “Fucking own me. Make this pussy yours, just like you used to.”

Just like last time, just like you used to—two statements that unwittingly conveyed that she’s dabbling in the past in a foolhardy manner. Damn it Chae… Why are you doing this? You’re thinking, even as you’re riotously making her bouncing breasts you handlebars, pinching her stiff peaks with between the gap of your middle and forefinger as you double down on her. You’re wondering, Why do you have to make this so damn complicated, as she leans back into you, and you mark the skin of her neck with your lips. Why couldn’t you just wait for me? Things wouldn’t have to be this way if you just had some damn patience, you’re pondering, all while she starts to throw herself back onto your cock. It’s hard to tell if she truly understands the emotional state she’s put herself in, you tell yourself. The irony of this statement is not lost on you, and you’re inwardly chortling at yourself as you pull yourself out of your own head.

You return to reality, and you find that Chaewon’s cumming once more. Did she announce its arrival? You don’t know. All you know is that her pussy is tightening rapidly around you, her body is shivering and shuddering against you, and her knees start giving out on her. You steady her against your chest, slowing yourself to a halt as you realise how dangerously close to the edge you are.

When she taps you on the knee, you take it as a sign to gently lay her back down on the bed. With her belly flat against the mattress, Kim Chaewon reaches behind her and spreads her asscheeks with her fingers. She gives you the slightest of nods; you pull out of her freshly fucked pussy, point the head of your cock at the opening of her ass, and begin to press forward.

Chaewon gasps as your head presses against her tight opening, her body refusing to let you in at first—but you press forward with your hips, slowly parting her entrance. Chaewon squirms and quivers as her opening slowly parts, and soon you are finally inside her. Her hands tighten into fists, scrunching up your bed sheets; a grimace of pain overtakes her partially turned head as you penetrate her ass for the first time. She lets a long hiss escape her lips, and you lean down to kiss the back of her head in an attempt to comfort her, bringing your left hand to match hers on the bed, covering her small hand with your own.

Soon you are halfway inside her ass, and you go no further, letting her get used to the new penetration. When you stop moving, Chaewon lets out a long breath that she didn’t know she was holding.

“You okay?” You’re checking on her out of genuine concern. It’s basic human decency, you’re trying to tell yourself, but you have a sinking feeling that she’s unknowingly broken past your defences.

“Fuck,” she spits, “fuck you’re so big inside me.”

“Do you want to—”

“Fuck no,” she snaps, “fuck, please don’t stop. I want this. I want you. I want you in my ass.”

The soft sigh you let out makes the hair atop her head flail a little as she wipes the tears from her cheeks. She isn’t crying anymore, but she certainly seems a little embarrassed that she let her emotions get the better of her.

“Keep going.” She can’t seem to raise her head as she speaks, “Fill me, please…”

Basic human decency drives you to compliance, and so you press forward—all the while, your eyes are affixed to the back of her head, your left hand still grasping hers while she shifts around slightly, adjusting herself to take you in better. The small yelps she occasionally lets slip tells you that she’s in discomfort, but not enough to make you stop entering her asshole. It’s too late to turn back now anyway.

It felt like years, but soon you're fully inside her, buried to the hilt inside Chaewon’s ass.

You slowly draw your shaft outside of Chaewon’s tightly gripping ass for the first time, and once it is halfway out, you slowly push back inside her. She's a quivering and squirming mess, and soon you are slowly pumping in and out of her body, your pace relaxed as you enjoy the tight, hot flesh of Chaewon’s body wrapped around your cock. You’re glad that the sheer sublimity of the sensation is removing your ability to think, allowing you to steep yourself in the moment with a turmoil free mind.

Chaewon’s tightness is overwhelming to say the least. Her pussy was tight, but her ass on another level altogether. Not as wet, of course, but almost overwhelmingly tight and hot, grasping you tightly with each entrance and exit like a glove. This would be the first time you’re entering her like this, and you aren’t sure if you’re doing it right, but soon she’s taking you in and out of her ass smoothly, the pain and discomfort of your initial penetration quickly lessening and giving way to the novel, new sensation of pleasure from having her ass filled.

Chaewon lets a short, sharp gasp escape her lips when you fill her to the hilt—one that takes her by surprise given the slight look of shock that you make out on her features. You reach down with your right hand, gingerly grip her chin and tilt her face up so you can get a better look at her face. Her eyes are glazed over now with pleasure, locking to yours as you start pumping in and out of her asshole. After a while her gasps lessen and then end completely as she becomes used to the hard length pumping in and out of her butt. She reaches up with her right hand to hold yours, and she pulls it down her chin until it’s at her throat. You didn’t know she was into choking, and she had never made you do it before. Then again, you’ve never had her ass before either—there’s a first for everything.

You feel her warm neck pulsing beneath your palm. She squeezes the outside of your hand slightly, causing you to clamp a little bit around her slim neck. The slightly reduced airflow at her throat causes her ass to clench even tighter around you: succulent pleasure to your mind that makes you think you are going insane. The novelty of fucking Chaewon’s ass, your hand around her throat, the carnality, the surprising tenderness of the moment–it’s all so damn overwhelming.

“C-Chae,” you call out to her. Her gaze flickers from the wall to your eyes, and you whisper, “Do you… Do you really want me to—”

“Just fucking do it!” Chaewon gasps, barely attempting to filter the want out of her voice, “Choke me! Cum in me!”

With her permission, you were more than willing to let yourself fall over the edge at this point.

Chaewon’s hand—the one that stops your hand at her throat—tightens, as though willing you to increase your grip on her windpipe. You are still afraid of hurting her—you already feel guilty for causing her pain and discomfort (physically and emotionally). But her hand on top of yours, clasped around her throat, dismissed any worry you may have had about taking things too far. Your orgasm beckons, and the hand around Chaewon’s pale throat tightens involuntarily with each thrust in her hot, tight hole.

Do it… own me—her voice is straining—Make yours again. Choke me while you fuck my ass… Use me! Fill me… Fill my ass with your cum!

With a few final, short, hard thrusts into Chaewon’s ass, you bury yourself as deep inside her as you can before finally letting go. Thick, hot cum spurts from your shaft into Chaewon’s willing depths, her hot, tight ass squeezing and pulsing around your cock as if milking every last drop from you. As you cum, your hand around her throat involuntarily tightens, and the moan that escapes Chaewon’s throat turns into a gasp—the dark part of you takes obscene pleasure in that fact.

Both of your bodies quiver and shake as the intense pleasure of your orgasm overwhelms your senses. It seems to last forever—longer than any other orgasm you’ve had. Nothing else exists for those long seconds, aside from Chaewon’s shaking body beneath you and the hot mess you’ve made inside her.

Your cock pulses a few final times as your orgasm slowly subsides and releases the last spurts of cum into Chaewon’s body and you regretfully come down from your high. After a few more seconds of treasuring the feel of the hot, creamy mess you’ve left inside her, you slowly draw your half-soft cock out of her body. Within seconds, white, pearly semen begins to leak out of her and onto the reddened, sore cheeks of her ass. Your eyes remain glued to Chaewon’s still-quivering form as she tries and mostly fails to collect herself. Slowly, she turns on her side, her whole body heaving like she’s completed a marathon. Her inner thighs glisten, your juices and hers flow down her naked skin. It's now that you remember what you agreed to before you started: Just for tonight…

“Hey…” Her voice has a lilt as she beckons you to her side. “Cuddle with me… Just for tonight.”

There she goes again.

Yeah, right... you sigh inwardly. The way she's looking at you tells you that the feelings brought forth tonight will persist as long as she permits. Maybe, just maybe, you should have turned her down, made her come as she was, and kept her at a distance; but she’s already snuggled up in your arms by the time you finish this train of thought. She kisses you on your jaw, then on your neck, then utters a soft good night baby before nuzzling herself into the crook of your neck.

Physically and emotionally, you've made a mess of her. And, in turn, she's made a mess of you too—physically and emotionally.

But you choose to forget that, just for tonight.

***

She slips out of your apartment at God knows what time, leaving like a thief in the night and leaving a note in her wake: I took one of your shirts. Will return it if I feel like it.

Then below the message: P.S. Forget that last night happened. Go continue being a player.

“I… Can’t believe this bitch.” You’re leaning against the door—the place where she’d stuck on the note—as you finish reading it. You decide to crumple it and toss it away—it’s the easiest thing to forget about her anyway.

To be clear: You had no clue what your opinion on Chaewon was anymore, nor did you know what your status with her was (though the note suggests that she’s going to return to her usual bratty behaviour). Sometimes, you wish that there could be a bright digital sign perpetually hanging above her head, providing interpretations to her erratic behaviour.

Yea… That would be great.

Just as you throw out her bowl of fried rice, there comes a knock on your door. You’re surprised to find Hwang Yeji standing there by herself.

“O-Oh… Yeji,” you mutter.

“That has to be the most asinine statement I’ve ever heard,” she derides. You purse your lips and scratch the back of your head, then you ask, “Do you uh… Need to borrow something?”

Yeji sighs and shakes her head. She’s quick to get to the point, “Are you free this afternoon?”

You nod, then she tells you, “I need you to follow me somewhere today. Meet me in the lobby at 3pm.”

She’s about to leave you with that vague request, but you’re quick to ask what this is about. It’s unwonted of her to suddenly request to meet you, and you’re painfully aware (or at least you thought you were) that she knows that this is unprecedented of her. Laconic and biting as ever, she turns back to you and tells you: I need you to help me talk to someone.

“W-Who?” You’re quick to ask. She turns her back to you as she answers.

“My junior. She wants to be our saxophonist.”

_________________________

What is popping gang. I did not get a chance to look through this thoroughly, nor was I able to get anyone to beta read for me :p. Hope you didn't have your bars raised to high for this.

~Nichuuu

#kim chaewon #chaewon smut #lesserafim smut #le sserafim #chaewon le sserafim #kpop #fanfic #writing #smut

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