#not a fan but treat him like a fucking real living person
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I saw someone making a tik tok of Feyre talking to Nesta to an audio of Lexi and Meredith from Grey’s anatomy, and omg some of these Feyre fans have selective reading 😭😭
"I forgive you for treating me like crap” That’s fair, she was mean to you, and you don’t owe her forgiveness for that.
“I forgive you for letting me go into the woods” Nesta didn’t let Feyre go into the woods and I’m sick of people pretending like she did. Feyre did it on her own, which because she was a child was not her responsibility. You know who else was a child? Nesta. And I’m willing to bet that if Feyre didn’t, Nesta would find a way to put food on the table, because she was the one chopping wood, and I’m pretty sure Elain and Papa Archeron weren’t the ones taking care of the house.
“I don’t know how you get up in the morning, I honestly don’t” you know what? Neither do I. Nesta has been through so much, all of you have and y’all continue to treat her like she hasn’t done anything for y’all. She’s stronger than I am.
“Our dad abandoned you and our mom by all accounts was the meanest person ever, and you can’t love Cassian and it really really sucks” yeah it does suck. It really does, because Cassian forced her into a hike with no regard for her safety, forced her into intensive training, isolated her, locked her in a house, and was an overall shitty person to her. Forgive Nesta if she has a hard time liking him.
“But ever since I knew you existed, I had this fantasy about my older sister, and you failed on every occasion to live up to that fantasy” Oh my fucking god Feyre, did she fail when she trekked up a mountain to find you? Did she fail when she saved your life because your mate couldn’t be bothered to think about potential dangers of having a child beforehand? Did she fail when she sacrificed her own happiness and body to seduce men three times her her age so that you and your family could be better off? Maybe she was mean to you, but that is some real shit.
Obviously it’s not that serious and the poster needed it to match the audio, but it makes me so annoyed when people throw Nesta off a cliff
#anti sjm#anti acotar#anti sarah j maas#anti rhysand#sjm critical#anti inner circle#pro nesta#anti feyre#feyre critical#nesta archeron deserves better#nesta archeron#anti cassian#anti nessian
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I feel like too many people don't understand that a bad person having normal human traits does not suddenly make them a good person
#& every person who thinks that way is sooo susceptible to abuse#like that's not a joke or anything like for real if you keep treating people as 2 dimensional#then you fall into the trap of ''they did 1 nice thing for me so they must not actually be bad''#you're allowed to like bad characters without scrambling to justify & write off their terrible actions & personality#like dude youre so desperate to not be caught liking something deviant youre using the same tactics as a H*rry P*tter fan#anyway i hope those people who like that asshole from ST never meet a Billy irl#cuz ive lived with Billys irl & it's not fucking fun. it's not interesting. it's living with an abusive piece of shit#just admit you think hes a good person because hes attractive. like youre fooling no one#if he didnt look like that youd call him a fucking freak. but he doesnt so hes just ''interesting to pick apart''#i can give you insight into that kind of person's brain: they literally would abuse you. they don't care. they think you deserve it#they can do nice things all they want but the ''niceness'' never quite reaches the same level the ''meanness'' gets to#theyre always paired together. they bought you an ice cream that costs less than a dollar? you owe them money plus interest#the reality of the situation is that every time someone like me sees you guys doing that#fawning over some asshole abuser & calling them perfect & explaining away their behaviour?#it literally sets me back. it makes me so fucking mad because that happens in real life. it's why the abuse never gets stopped#no one believes you because ''well they were nice to ME & look nice so i dont believe you''#i know how much you guys hate acknowledging apologism but like. that's abuse apologism right there
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Desire.
Shin Yuna. The world sees her as a world famous idol, a paragon of beauty of grace. An individual to look up to, a person to aspire towards. Some might see her as untouchable, in a social sphere somewhere near the clouds. But she is more than just an idol with a hectic schedule and a busy life. Yuna is a real life human being, and every human has their flaws, their desires, their dark secrets that they need to keep hidden from the world.
And right now Yuna sure is living up to desires.
"You gonna do it? You gonna cum on my face?"
There she is, the picture perfect idol, sitting on her feet, naked as the day she was born. Surrounding her are three hand selected males, her hand vigorously pumping the cock directly in front of her. Yuna's eyes are firmly set on the glistening knob that her hands are wrapped around, her fingers nimbly moving from tip to hilt, her thumb digging into the meat and tugging and massaging with ferocious intent.
The other two aren't just standing idly by—they're groping and spanking whatever they feel like, an opportunity like this one is unheard of, but a gift Yuna loves to indulge. You see, underneath that cute and bubbly personality, and beyond all her flawless photoshoots and iconic concerts, the fact remains that Yuna is, above everything else, a cock obsessed slut.
The feeling of multiple hands and several hard, throbbing members grazing her petite body always fills Yuna with a pleasure that no amount of her fingers can ever truly match. The pinching of her nipples, the light and harsh spanks to her ass, the feeling of a cock throbbing in her hands. All of these things send her reeling into euphoria.
"Do it! Cum on my face. You gonna make me work for it? Do I have to suck you off? Make you cum by slurping your juices? My hand not enough?"
Her questions comes with a gentle lick to the underside of his shaft. It makes the cock twitch violently in Yuna's firm grip. He's already reaching his climax, that much is evident to Yuna. The only thing she needs now is for him to vocalize.
"I'm gonna... Yuna, I'm..."
"Come on, babe."
With a guttural moan, Yuna feels her cheek being covered by a blast of sticky warmth, followed by spurts of cum across her lips and chin and nose.
She looks down, mouth gaping, tongue hanging out, eye's narrow. The feeling of the sticky substance smeared over her skin, a marking that has her feel warm all over.
"Who's next?!" Yuna moves away from the well spent man, turning her attention to the other two behind her. One has his hands clasped to Yuna's ample ass, the other never stops roughly groping and grabbing her tits, pulling her nipples this and that way.
Yuna doesn't even know these lucky bastard's names—and that's precisely the point. All she knows is that they're some of her biggest fans, and because Yuna's not one to disappoint her supporters, the only reasonable thing for her to do is invite them back to her hotel room for an honest to God gangbang.
No real names, no exchanging numbers. Just a night of fun.
It's Yuna's idea of an ideal way to unwind before an important gig, and she's taking it upon herself to fully indulge.
"You know I offer more than just hand jobs right? My mouth, my pussy...my ass."
Yuna puts some emphasis when she says the word ass—she knows how taboo it is, to be an idol who loves to be fucked in her forbidden hole. Tempting over eager fan boys is such a power rush to Yuna, especially since she always gets what she wants in the end. And tonight will be no different.
Not only does the sudden spurt of her words catch the other two guys off guard, so do her slender fingers, that have already found their way around the nearest cock.
She looks up into his eyes, practically staring into his soul.
"So what do you say sweetheart? Which hole do you wanna fuck? Do you want my mouth? Is it my pussy you craving?"
Yuna smirks.
"Or maybe," her other hand slowly reaches to her asshole, "you're gonna shove your cock right here and treat me like a total anal slut."
She isn't quite touching her tight hole, but her fingertips hover tantalizing close. Close enough to make the guy think of exactly what she's describing, all the dirty details, from start to end. And the mere thought is starting to make him go crazy.
"Have you ever done anal before?"
Her soft and playful tone is hard to resist. This entire experience has left the guy totally speechless. He shakes his head, unable to verbalize any words of any kind.
"Well what do you say Hun? Wanna pop your anal virginity with a world famous superstar?"
Yuna doesn't even give him a chance to answer—she bends down on the bed, ass up face down, spread apart in a position that leaves her totally open to her new fuck buddies.
He watches in absolute shock and disbelief as Yuna playfully wiggles her plump behind, teasingly caressing her puckering asshole in a display that leaves him unable to hold off. He licks his fingers, saliva coating his palm as he reaches forward to insert his middle finger into Yuna's butt. She wasn't lying; Yuna is an anal loving slut, a star whore, and this position is making her squirm. The soft, coos leaving her lips are proof of the immense arousal coursing through her veins. The fact that her pussy is dripping means even more.
"I don't want your finger," Yuna turns back, staring into his eyes again, "I want your cock."
He pulls his finger out with a lewd squelching sound, only to replace it with his cock—hard and pulsating, a sheer result of the slutty actions from the girl splayed out in front of him, seemingly on a platter.
The tip presses against Yuna's eager asshole. She starts to whimper, just slightly, an involuntary reflex as a wave of pleasure fills her veins. It's about to begin, and that moment is like heaven to Yuna.
"Do it," she utters, more quietly now that the tip of his cock is pressing up against her most private place. "Don't tease. Fuck me in the ass. Do it. Please..."
Those few simple, begging words are the green light the guy has been waiting for. A cue to fully penetrate her rear, spreading it open with a searing, heavy thrust. It doesn't matter that it's his first time—Yuna loves to fuck. She loves it in any position, anywhere, in any circumstance. Yuna was made to be fucked and tonight is no exception, that is a fact.
So the feeling of his heavy prick ramming her open, and the sweet, familiar burn that comes after sends Yuna into a total blissed-out state. Even though this is what Yuna was begging for, the thrusts are slow and inexperienced—her new living dildo seemingly afraid to hurt his favorite idol.
"Don't be gentle! Fuck me hard, deeper...please, please! Wreck my asshole!"
Those words are enough. They spur the young man into action, and instead of taking it nice and slow, Yuna feels her whole ass shuddering at the rapid pace her lover is now setting. It hurt. Oh God did it fucking hurt.
The kind of pain that leaves her feeling filled with the greatest pleasure. The kind of pain that reminds her that she's alive—not some brainless idol robot with an image to protect. Yuna is a woman with sexual needs and she's not afraid to admit them.
"Faster, don't stop. More, oh God yes!!" Yuna is spouting out all the right things and it's certainly having an effect. "Fuck me!" Her hands grope her perky ass cheeks, trying their hardest to keep them spread open for the fuckfest raging on in the depths of her backdoor.
Her insides felt great to her new partner, especially as he gets more adventurous and drives her over the edge of euphoria with a thrust here, a squeeze there. His hands are gripping her hips, driving his rock hard length further into her cavern.
It must have been such a fucking miserable sight. The third guy in the room ignored and forgotten, sporting a massive erection whilst sitting on the edge of a King sized bed. Yuna didn't even notice it, nor did the guy currently drilling her ass. But she definitely notices it when he lifts her head and presses his tip against her slightly parted lips. The action catches her off guard, almost. It's just a quick glance and a lust filled smirk, but the quick understanding between them has her open her mouth to swallow the intruding piece of flesh.
"You want me to suck your cock while I'm getting fucked in the ass?! What a joke!"
The man looks dejected. That is until Yuna licks her lips and flashes a coy smile. She shakes her head, waves of dark hair falling around her cheeks and onto her back.
"I'm not gonna suck it. But you can fuck my face. Spit roast me. Make me choke me on your cock, choke me as his big, hard dick fills my little asshole."
Yuna opens her mouth, her tongue laid flat and waiting to be invaded. There's an overwhelming desire to be filled from both ends, a carnal hunger. If that's what it takes for her to receive this much pleasure, then so be it. She just wants her holes stuffed, fucked hard until they're so worn, so well used that her mind blanks into total ecstasy.
Yuna sucks and moans and mewls as he's driving his cock down her throat. Any cries of pleasure from being torn apart from behind gets muffled and lost under the garbled and sloppy sounds of the face-fucking.
She takes his cock hungrily into her mouth, bobbing back and forth, not even worrying about the gagging sensations or the burning in her throat, or the spit dripping from her mouth, nor even her eyes beginning to water.
The taste, the scent—the full sensory overload from receiving both a full frontal assault on her gag reflex and a rump fuck all at once is driving her crazy. Her clit is swollen and sensitive, and everytime she shakes her ass to guide his cock deep inside, her clit brushes against the silk-soft sheets and tenses something tight and coils deep within her core.
It builds, tighter, hotter—and the wetness trickling out of her needy, untouched cunt only aids the thrusts from his eager tool.
Her whole body shakes and trembles. A total body orgasm as she's used and abused by two strangers, faceless tools for her sexual pleasure. They take her, use her, violate and violate, spanking and penetrating wherever they pleased.
And through it all she takes it with grace, glee, and happiness. The pain mixed in with the pleasure was intense. Overwhelming. Every time another palm cracks against her reddening cheeks, every time that she's choked and pounded harder, deeper, it leaves her begging for more. Every thrust from either end sends another surge of the hottest, fiercest tingling through her veins. Yuna's completely submerged into the moment, so lost within it. A cocktail of sheer masochism and perverted need to be nothing but an object for her boys' enjoyment.
Then it happens, with another hard thrust into her slutty backdoor, everything snaps—and Yuna screams into a prolonged, euphoric moan. She cums, and she cums hard. Her second one in such a short space of time. It's so intense—so overwhelming.
It takes a whole minute before the world starts to spin again, the rush and adrenaline is almost too much, the double penetration pushing the boundaries and making Yuna realize how she could die right here, right now, and still not care. She almost forgets she's an idol for a moment, the label seeming so alien and irrelevant as the rest of her facade disintegrates along with her mind and body, dissolving under a sea of pleasure. Slowly fading as her partner finally bursts with an eruption of hot, thick, cum, coating her insides, filling her ass until it can hold no more and starts leaking out onto her skin and the plushy fabric of the covers.
The constant moans of joy must have been too much for the man occupying her throat. Cuz shortly after her ass is stuffed full, so is her mouth, spurt after spurt, sending Yuna straight into an orgasmic daze.
It's incredible—such a heavenly, amazing, thrilling and powerful feeling of a double load pumped into both of her holes.
She swaps from feeling like an object, a fuck toy, something to be used and abused, to just Yuna. Yuna who craves pleasure, needs love, and wants a feeling of validation that she's doing her very best to fill up with constant sexual trysts and promiscuous nights. It doesn't work though, because she can never truly be satisfied. No man, no orgy, no gangbang has ever been enough, never even been close enough. But when it's all over, these times, these moments are what Yuna lives and breathes for.
There's four bodies on the bed, laid out and completely wrecked—Yuna, the man with the enormous cock that spread her anal walls, the man that got the handjob of a lifetime from none other than Yuna herself, and the forgotten dude who eventually got to fuck her throat. Yuna can barely see or talk after being ravaged, but even still she's smiling like the cat that got the cream—because in essence, she had three extra large creamy loads.
It's not enough, no amount of cock could ever satisfy Yuna, but this is good enough for tonight. Tomorrow brings another night. Another night to find a nice gentleman to stuff her pussy that was left unfulfilled, left on the verge, twitching and ready to burst. But tomorrow is a worry for the future—now is the time for rest and relaxation, for recovery.
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The Creed
Chapter 2 - Second Plate...
Genre: Smut
Tags: F/M, F/F/M, F/F/F/M, Facefuck, Throatfucking Rough Sex, Dirty Talk, Harem, Self-degradation, Masochism/Sadism(?), Cum Play, Piss Play
(The things in the tags will be present when the time needs for it.)
Disclaimer: This work is a fan-fiction and does not depict the person/people mentioned in the story.
A/N: You can self-insert if you want...
FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP
“Just like that, obediently lay down and be used by me.”
“YES SIR, OH MY GOD!!! YOU ARE HITTING SO FUCKING D-DEEP!!! I'M YOUR SLUT, YOURS ALONE, PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME. RUIN ME FOR OTHER MEN. UGGHHHH, UGH-FUCCCK, SHIIIIIT!!!” Karina moans like a total slut craving for some rough fucking... Vlad told her to bend her knees to her chest and raises her feet while laying down, penetrating her deeper making her eyes rolling back and her tongue lolling out.
His study has a bed for the reason that he sleeps in the study more frequently instead of his bedroom since he's getting more requests nowadays.
"That's it, lose yourself in pleasure. Let me see that tongue of yours lolling out." Vlad thrusting into her with a fierce and unrelenting force, his massive rod buried deep inside her, Karina couldn't help but let out a string of moans and gasps that echoed throughout the room.
Karina was known for her confidence and strength on stage, in this moment, she was completely submissive to the man's will. Letting herself get consumed by lust and her carnal desire to be used.
“How are you so fucking b-big” She said between moans.
“You'll take this dick everyday whenever I want to, fucking slut. You are MINE now.” He slapped her face then grabbed her neck to choke her while still fucking her deeply.
FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP
“AACHHKKK- YES SIR! I'm your dumb slut. Just a cum d-dumpster for you, PLEASE F-FUCK ME. USE ME WHENEVER YOU WANT.” She managed to respond despite the choking.
Vlad is fascinated in her hidden slutty side. He just knows that k-pop idols are the horniest because of their job to act the way people want them to behave and so their real personality lay dormant within them until provoked. “I'll use you, keep begging slut."
FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP
“YOUR DICK FEELS SO FUCKING GOOD!!!” She screams in ecstasy as she lay underneath him. “IT'S REACHING SO DEEP!!!”
He's kissing her in a ravenous passion, unrelenting with his thrust, and insatiable lust for her, for her clenching walls massaging his entire length... Seeing her beg for more adds fuel to his already burning and scorching desire to claim her, make her dependent on him, a cockslave... that only lives for his pleasure.
“You like that? You like getting treated like piece of meat... like an object of pleasure?” He grinned at her moving his hips in a rhythm that stimulates her even further.
He squeezing her cheeks with his hand and she can barely talk. “YESSHH SHIRR! I"M A DUMB WHORE, A FUCK MEAT READY TO PLEASHHURE YOU ANYTIME.” She gave a very satisfying answer.
“Right, a fuck meat, remember your role from now on.” He thrusts his hips forward and meet her cervix in one fell swoop. Karina screams her lungs out as she felt his huge cock trying to enter the forbidden domain, she's new in deep penetration. This is her first time getting railed to the extent that she can feel a cock touching her deep ends.
“OH FUUUUCKKK!!! TOO DEEP! YOU ARE TOO DEEP SIRRRR!! SHIT, SHIT, SHIIIIT!!!!” She said as Vlad pounded into her by pulling his entire length except the tip then thrusting full throttle over and over again. "SIR, I'M CUMMING!!! SHITTTT. LET ME CUM, LET ME CUM PLEAAASSHHH!"
FLAP FLAP FLAP FLAP
“SIR, Y-YOU'RE SPLITTING ME APART!!! HE-HEHEHE, FUUUCCCKKK! KEEP USING ME. PLEASE. HEH-EHEHE. IT FEELS SO. FUCKING. GOOD!!!! ” She's losing her mind, laughing... Vlad continues to pound her not stopping. “AAAAHHHHH, I'M CUMMIIIIIINNNGGG!!!” Karina squeal as she explode, squirting... Vlad's fucked her through her orgasm making it more sensitive and stimulating until he reached his own peak and release it inside of her womb.
"I'M CUMMING INSIDE OF YOU, SLUT!!!"
"YEEEES PLEASE FUCKING GIVE IT TO ME." Karina said while still overstimulated, and felt a surge of liquid in her womb. "HEHE-HE, I can feel you cum inside of me, it's warm... I want it everyday, i want to be fucked silly by you... Sir.. please, can you please continue using me?" She said while caressing her underbelly that is noticeably bulging due to Vlad's massive load.
"Of course, fucking dumb whore... you are mine now. I'm going to use you whenever I want to." He said while pulling out watching his obscene amount of cum pour out of Karina's now loose pussy.
She smiled, “Yes, I'm a dumb whore, thank you for putting me in my place, Sir. Please keep reminding me with your massive cock...” Karina stares at Vlad with such submissiveness as if she's been bewitched by him...
Vlad left Karina in his study to rest, since she's worn out even with just one session with him. Even if he claims that he'll use her which is the truth, he's not a total scumbag that he will not look out for her well being. He then decided to go to his firing range to let off steam, Karina is a lucky one, he showed mercy to her since she's half drunk when she went to see him...
When he arrived, he was welcomed by a small petite figure rummaging his armory... "What are you doing here?" he said.
A/N: A short update... Oh wait, all my works are short... Anyways, enjoy this short piece.
#kpop smut#smut#kpop fic#itzy smut#aespa smut#karina smut#kpop#red velvet smut#twice smut#(g) idle smut
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re: boundaries
I've made many posts previously on this subject already, so people are already aware of my stance regarding disliking the way "boundaries" as a concept are used by the mcyt fandom, however I want to have a brief meditation on why this is the case, and a look at common arguments about them.
however i do want to make clear that i don't mind boundaries as a concept, actual boundaries. as in "if you do x, i will respond with y" kinds of boundaries. I think cc are completely fair and understandable in this kind of perspective. if someone makes a kind of content they dislike, they're free to block that fan or express discomfort over it. That's normal.
my critical eye is turned toward the fandom's perception of "boundaries" as a sort of fandom ruleset, either you follow them with the in-group, or you're thrown in the out-group and labelled all sorts of insults, anywhere from a criminal offender to just having people be plain nasty toward you. this in my opinion, really feeds into the fandom habit of having "cliques" as fandoms are social networks that are voluntarily joined. i find it juvenile at best.
at worst, on the other hand, is the concept of mcyt having mixed in kpop stan culture around 2019 with smplive (great server. horrific fandom at the time it was run. all of the smplive fans still left are veterans worthy of respect for surviving that.), which caused a very explosive mixture.
kpop fandom has this outlook and parasociality toward idols because these idols are borderline unreachable. even in smaller groups, companies generally (not always.) discourage idols from talking one-on-one selectively with fans. there deserves to be a more thorough examination of kpop fandom with stan culture, that i believe i am not fully qualified for. my point is that kpop idols are a hell of a lot harder to reach for english fans, whether through language barrier or through professionality done by companies.
the explosive mixture is bringing this same mentality - the mentality that these people you look toward as the main source of the fandom as being untouchable, perfect people. it's dehumanizing in its own right, but aside from that, it creates a dangerous fandom situation. as best shown using smplive with CallMeCarson from before.
CMC is the origin point of boundaries within the MCYT fandom, having held a live in fall of 2019 talking about how a popular danganronpa themed wattpad smplive fanfiction was upsetting for him to read. CMC had an intense fanbase that could and would look up to him no matter what. of course the fanbase would go after and harass this author off of the internet and deleting their work (which remained lost media until this January of 2024. Almost half a decade.) after this situation, only months later it comes out that CMC had in fact been manipulating women aged 17 to early 20s, into sexual dms and sending him explicit photos of themselves for around a year. i am of the opinion CMC would have done this behavior regardless, however, the fact he had access to so many women who put him on a pedestal without considering he could exploit them was exacerbated by the stan culture mentality of mcyt's fandom at the time. this is not a criticism of the women, it is a criticism of the fandom culture of the time for failing to treat carson as a human being who had every capability to treat people like this.
no cc is exempt from that mentality by the fandom. carson knowingly used his position within the fandom to make the choice to do that to those girls. no cc should be exempt from the real possibility of the consideration that they can fuck up, not always in the way that they necessarily need to be cancelled or deplatformed, carson is an extreme example that is absolutely not representative of cc as a whole, but there needs to be a healthy level of doubt and separation between creators and fans.
to reiterate: cc are not your friends. cc do not need you to speak for them. you do not know these people personally. to present your defense of them and their personal opinions like you spoke to them directly and are close friends is dangerous, both for yourself, and for other fans in the community.
everything i have listed is why i always will be critical toward any fan group or clique that presents themselves as being pillars of the community, and why i am critical of any page or resource that tries to list "boundaries" as hard fast rules to be self policed by the fandom. not only is that punitive mentality, it's careless and poor understanding of how communities at large work.
i don't think a "boundaries" list is necessarily a bad idea in the long run either, if these lists were, like, compilations of streamers' twitch chat rules, that'd be cool! but generally these lists lack any nuance of why and where some boundaries may apply. like a ton of streamers hate ships being spammed in chat, but could give less of a fuck about people making ship fanart. or like wouldn't care as long as the ship art isn't put in their main tag.
as well as the general ignoring of regular boundaries, we all remember the horror show of people dono-ing to cc in 2020-22 asking for their boundaries right? like just so we're explicitly clear, walking up to someone and asking what someone's opinion of making adult content of them is very much sexual harassment. that's objectively something fans should not be asking to cc. if they want to say something, they can speak up on their own. they do not need your prompting. if you wouldn't ask it to your boss in an office, don't ask cc it. tangentially related is the ignoring of boundaries based on disliking fans harassing each other or other cc. those boundaries never get to be prioritized for a reason, as those behaviors feed into the stan culture mentality of pitting sources against each other in fan wars.
parasociality and stan culture turn mcyt fandom into a power vacuum where fans who like to self-police to a dangerous extent try to take charge. this makes the fandom worse.
#ive had this in my drafts for months might as well drop this now LOL#discourse#mcyt discourse#posts from the aether
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Episode 4
TW: Rape, Sexual Assault and Abuse, Physical abuse.
So uh, I really did just guess "there is no way it's that bad, right?"...
OK, SO LET'S TALK. So again if you haven't seen the episode big Trigger Warning for its content! It's real heavy, explicit and on your face. I'm a Sexual abuse victim talking about this, just so you know.
I think the bigger problem I have with the episode, it's the context surrounding it and what happens later on, specially. Many people can have different views on the poison scene itself, for their own. But that scene, even if you as a victim relate, can only really work in a vacuum. Why? Let's see... hum.... The jokes of male SA in Helluva Boss? How it's written as funny to Moxxie to get assaulted? By the Succubus, Blitz, Chaz? Not seeing any problem in Stolitz, and victim blaming Blitz.
Suddenly Viv wants to be like: "Male sexual assault and abuse it's so not talked about, I'm going to write about it". As if she didn't write all those HB jokes. All those jokes are only men getting assaulted too, by other men or woman. The SA and r-pe it's funny when it's done to men, why did this even happen?
Even if the entire episode 4 was good, why did the same person write all this jokes? Is the sexual harassment Angel does to husk, even going to be addressed later or...? The biggest problem, it's the bad execution. Something happens a lot with HB and HH, it's that scenes and concepts work In isolation, that way you imagine in infinite possibilities of the "what if this". But they give you is in it'self not that good. The series does expect you to be a fan, and have to watch the pilot. Because it doesn't really bother to introduce the characters or anything. So the emotional bits don't hit that hard if you didn't already care about the characters since or before the pilot.
Since the first episodes, Valentino has being changing between fucking idiot and horrifying monster. In episode 2 he is treated as a stupid dumbass. I feel like all the episodes until 4 were too much, on the comedy shit- to immediately jump into explicit abuse and SA is a lot. In the end of the episode they also shift back the tone, weirdly.
So we jump into Val and Angel's work, showing how shitty val is. Charlie jumps into interrupting the hole thing. AND VAL ASSAULTS HER TOO??? I didn't expect that. He grabs her kisses and lick up her arm, and gets too close to her in other scenes. Then Charlie accidentally ruins the set, and Val ends up physically abusing Angel. Living him with a black eye, and it's shown Angel did a deal with him. Leaving him fully trapped with him (not a legal contract, but a devil/sinner bound magic thing). Then it's poison music number.
Many people feel like it's too graphic. Other people will say it's okey, because it shows the problem straight on, and it's supposed to make you uncomfortable.
Explicit doesn't = good.
You can talk a lot of what does this level of graphic/explicit add to the conversation.
My main problem with it being so explicit comes from who is directing that hole part of the episode. I talked about it in the post above. The person in question:
(BLURRED CUT PICTURE)
Does this scene above seem familiar to you? This person put together with how the poison part of the episode is played out AND all the disgusting "SA is funny" jokes HB make this a fucking problem.
AND THEN THE FUCKING ENDING IS CRAZY BAD LIKE HELLO???? At the end, Angel is at a bar, and his drink gets spiked. Husk gets him out and fights against the guys that spiked the drink. Then they kindly have an argument... To get through the whole heavy ass episode- to then Husk hit with a song calling Angel a baby IS FUCKING CRAZY. I see what the point was supposed to be, but the execution absolutely kills it. The song tries to compare Husk and Angel, to say shit sucks but hey it's okay we are in this together, BUT HOLY SHIT. Why, comparing Angel Dust being sexually abused under a demonic contract (HE IS STILL UNDER)- to Husk having to work for Alastor. Yes, Husk fucked up his life in hell do to gambling- that's not comparable to Angel being in an abusive relationship where he gets taken advantaged of. Calling Angel dust a baby loser, "everyone got it difficult get over your self"- it's fucking crazy. The fact that the episode ends on everyone happy and laugh it off it awful! WHAT HAPPEN???????? Like Angel is still under Val's contract- his going to have to go back to work, or to any other place where his drink could be spiked. We are still in the same problem. I don't- I don't understand. The song wasn't even a "I'll help you", it felt more like "Hey shit sucks, get over it". How did you write that? I don't think the series has the time or good enough space to treat the subjects- and they are dealing in the worst way.
EDIT:
I cannot believe this woman made a cum joke, about the song that it's about being trapped with your abuser- that comes with really graphic scenes of assault and r-pe. Like the whole song it's about that???? It's not a "Hot sexy" song, it's literally all sexual assault and workplace abuse.
This scene is from a non canon comic from the same artist above, got immediately referenced in the scene after poison. That's crazy. Also, The artist is... uh......... Did you know that in episode 4. It got showed that Angel's real name is Anthony? They changed their name to Tony, make themselves look like Angel? Now does sex work like Angel. They choreographed the pole dancing in Addict?
AND Viv just reduced Angel's Sexual Harassment of Husk as:
Angel trows himself to Husk, grabs him, touches him, makes unwanted sexual comments. You, have never left the weird shipping of queer of mean that revolts around sexual harassment. It's like old ass garbage Wattpad yaoi, not acknowledging those problems. Why is there more attention to that than Charlie and Vaggie, who lacks so much personality and everything. WLW with no condiments and artificial as fuck MLM with microplastics.
#vivziepop critique#vivziepop critical#helluva boss critique#helluva boss criticism#helluva boss critical#hazbin hotel critical#hazbin hotel criticism#hazbin hotel critique#tw rape#tw sa#tw abuse
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I really need to vent about how much I like Cal and Merrin's dynamic in Jedi: Survivor cause they've quickly become probably my favorite canon pairing in the franchise.
I absolutely love that this relationship is built on the basis of friendship, respect, and a genuine mutual understanding of each other. From gameplay comments and conversations, Cal is very clearly so enamored with Merrin and literally everything about her. I know it's become a bit of a joke how clearly into her he is but he just thinks she's the most incredible being in the entire galaxy and it's honestly the sweetest thing. The writers could have very easily made his connection to Merrin a weakness or had it where it made his struggle with the darkness harder but I adore that they allowed him to be completely smitten with her and presented it as a strength. It's refreshing not only in Star Wars but in media in general, at least in my opinion. Love being presented as a positive asset is something so deeply missing in media nowadays - especially romantic love. Far too often in this day and age, love is presented as a weakness or something that will only bring you down, so I respect the fuck out of this writing.
Oops, this got really, really long so I'm putting the rest under a cut. It's kind of spitfire, so I apologize if it feels random.
I love how their first kiss is Merrin basically making a split-second decision where she realizes she doesn't want to die without kissing him at least once even if it runs the risk of making things awkward should they survive. Is it cliche as fuck? Absolutely, but it works so well in this instance. Cal being so dumbfounded, gawking at her like a fish, trying to process what the hell just happened that BD has to remind him they're literally about to die is the best thing too.
I appreciate that Cal is so obviously hesitant about giving into any sort of romantic feelings for Merrin because, of course, he would be due to his upbringing. He's pushing so hard against it to the point that he's even completely reluctant to so much as discuss it with Bode when they're on the Lucrehulk. Personally, I don't think Cal is oblivious to their potential feelings for each other. I've never been a huge fan of treating Cal as completely naive. He still might be a bit emotionally stunted, sure but he's lived 10 years outside of the Jedi Order at this point. I think he's hesitant to talk about it because first of all, it's really none of Bode's business but also, if he talks about it, he has to admit it, and if he admits it, that makes it real, and if it's real... well fuck, now he has to do something about it either way which is exactly what he's trying to avoid. I think he's trying to stay as neutral about it as he can until he gets to a point in the story/his arc where he decides he actually wants or feels ready to make a decision. Bode almost gets it out of him too before they're interrupted. The progression of Bode's questioning during that mission is something I actually find really interesting but that's a different topic.
Many people have pointed this out but Cal smiling so brightly while Merrin is clearly freaking the fuck out of Bode is just the cutest thing. Not only because he finds such humor in her scaring the shit out of people for fun when he of all people knows it's a running joke but he also goes along with the joke any chance he gets. He does this even when she's not around. People will be freaked out by her and he still plays along and it's not even like, "Yeah, I know, she's fucking scary bro," it's more like, "Yeah, I know, she can wake the dead, isn't it amazing how scary she is!" Someone else already pointed this out in another post but that feels almost more intimate than any kiss they share. His attraction to her encompasses all sides of her including those that many people find incredibly terrifying and I find that so endearing, he wouldn't ask her to change for anything. He's the only person who genuinely isn't freaked out by her in the slightest but not only that, he finds that side of her to be so incredible. Also, Cal being so blase with Bode about his obvious attraction to Merrin a mission prior and then having the most blatant sexual tension with her in front of Bode in the next scene is peak comedy, I don't care what anybody says. Like, Cal, honey, you just spent the entire previous mission trying to convince Bode (and yourself) there's nothing there and/or you're not pursuing it, so you're not doing yourself any favors by looking at her like that, standing that close to her, and speaking to her with the cadence of a lover bro.
I love that the second Cal walks onto the Mantis after killing Rayvis, she instantaneously picks up on the fact that something's wrong. Literally instantaneously. You can see her face drop the moment she sees him. She just knows something happened. Her ability to read him insanely well is something that is introduced very early on in the game, most noticeably in the campfire scene, and it stays consistent over the course of the story. The following conversation they have is honestly one of the best moments between them in the entire game. It's this type of conversation I've been wanting to see with a Jedi and their potential lover since Revenge of the Sith. He is so open with her even in a somewhat roundabout way about his genuine fear of losing himself and while the conversation is not explicitly about their relationship, the implication is still there and she 100% picks up on it, especially since he wonders aloud why Santari didn't see the change in Dagan before it was too late. Instead of shaming him for his reservations or calling it ridiculous or anything else she could have said at this moment, she instead decides to possibly help curb those fears and give him some comfort regarding it. She goes on to basically tell him in so few words she knows what she's signing up for and is willing to cross those bridges with him if they come. It's a great difference between Cal and Dagan. Though it's never outright stated that Dagan and Santari were in love, I feel like it's... pretty heavily implied, or at least he was definitely in love with her (was I the only one who read it that way??) but whereas Dagan demands that Santari talk him away from the darkness and seems to almost expect her to, Merrin herself plainly offers to do it with no prodding on Cal's part. It doesn't seem to be a burden Cal wanted to put on her, not something he was inherently expecting of her but she willingly offers, it is her choice, she wants to carry that burden with him. While she does seem maybe slightly annoyed by his hesitancy regarding their relationship to each other, she is also so incredibly patient with him while he's stewing over what he wants to do. It's beautiful. As a side note, "A shared dream is not so easy to wake from," is such an amazing line. Seriously, I want merch with that quote on it.
I liked that going through with the relationship was Cal's choice in the end. Merrin didn't push it, she didn't pressure it. She let him bring it up and come to her when he was ready and if that meant potentially being rejected by a man she very clearly adores, so be it, and I have no doubt she would've respected that choice if that's what he'd wanted. I know a lot of people seem to think he only makes this decision due to Bode's questions earlier but it really seems to be a combination of multiple things that lead to this. Bode picking his brain definitely got him thinking about it, maybe more than he wanted to, but I do think the other big part of Cal being willing to go forward with it at this moment is his confrontation with Dagan that, while an illusion, did cause him to come to grips with his own mortality in a way. "How does it feel knowing you're about to die. That your life meant nothing." As Cal says, Dagan uses an extremely powerful force hallucination based on fear here, so while losing himself to the darkness might scare him, his life being completely meaningless is what he seems to fear the most. Cal's journey throughout Survivor encompasses many things but one of them revolves around feeling aimless and finding a purpose, preferably outside of being a hired weapon that will surely and slowly consume him. It's what everyone consistently tells him: find a home, settle down, embrace happiness because it's fleeting, the path you're on is not healthy and will consume you otherwise...etc. His decision here to give in to his romantic attraction to Merrin is a culmination of all of these interactions and conversations he's had throughout the story, how they've influenced his line of thinking, and him coming to his own conclusions regarding what he personally wants and at this moment, when things are finally, calm and everyone is in a good place with a plan going forward, he personally decides there's no point in living up to the expectations of the Jedi when the Order doesn't exist anymore and wants to see where this could go.
I love the fact that when Merrin witnesses Cal's darkness in the ISB, it's made abundantly clear that she's just as afraid of losing him as he most likely is of losing her. I do think a major reason why she was able to talk him down at the moment is that he fundamentally understands what it feels like to lose everything and everyone, your entire livelihood. That is what they first bonded over and it's something that keeps them bonded in the saddest, yet most profound way and he would never want to add himself to the list of people she's lost. She's also doing exactly what she said she would. In an instance where again, she reads him like a fucking book, she can tell just from his responses on the intercom that he's losing himself and is guiding him back. She immediately went to rescue him as she says. No question, no argument, nothing, she simply does it. She made him a promise and she kept it and in that moment, he promises that she won't lose him, he won't allow it. This is a fundamental difference between Anakin and Padme's dynamic and Cal and Merrin's. While Anakin's love for Padme quite famously ends up extremely selfish in an "I would lose myself to ensure you're not ripped away from me" type of way, Cal and Merrin's dynamic is leaning towards a more selfless, "I won't allow myself to be lost because I can't let that happen for your sake," type of way and god damn it, I love it.
There are several interactions they have in gameplay that I'm lowkey peeved weren't included in cutscenes and one of them is when Cal returns to the Mantis after all but demolishing the ISB, they have this really short but great interaction where Merrin says that if he ever feels that way again, he needs to tell her. She doesn't even ask him to do it, she all but demands it, "If you feel that way again, you will tell me." She's demanding communication from him regarding the darkness and he doesn't fight this demand at all. He agrees to respect this request and I fucking love that from both of them. I will genuinely be kinda upset if we don't get a moment like that in the next game.
I like how their kiss after they've successfully navigated the abyss is kind of their first kiss inverted but instead of "omg we might die, I need to kiss you" it's more "holy shit, we survived, I need to kiss you," but instead of Merrin initiating, now it's Cal. I'm probably reading too much into that but whatever, it's cute.
This isn't about any one part in particular but I do love that it looks like the headcanon so many people had regarding Merrin most likely being quite physically affectionate is turning out to be true.
...I think that's enough for now lol I might add on some things later
Apologies for any typos and thanks for indulging my rambling if you got this far.
#star wars#jedi survivor#jedi survivor spoilers#cal kestis#nightsister merrin#merrical#calmerrin#cal x merrin#dagan gera#santari khri#bode akuna#mine
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Yandere! Tooru Oikawa General Profile
Yandere! Tooru Oikawa x fem! reader
Tw: kidnapping, mentions of stalking, non-consensual touching, mentions of non-con, possessiveness, mentions of murder, threats, one brief mention of eating/eating enough, extreme dependency, allusions to neglect, this one's a little sad because I think Tooru could only become yandere for someone he's known for quite a while like a friend, brief mentions of physical violence, manipulation, Tooru is mean to a fan so reminder to never meet your heroes, fem reader, MDNI
I do not condone any of the actions described in this post - this is fiction and should be treated as such. If you or a loved one is in a similar situation to anything contained in this post or my blog in general, please seek help. You're in charge of your internet consumption; please make responsible choices. With that, enjoy!
WC: 10K
DARLING PROFILE:
Sweet
First and foremost, while Tooru deeply respects and loves Iwaizumi, his teammates and his often insulting banter with them, there’s nothing that melts his heart more than genuine compliments from those he cares about.
Of course, he’s used to women fawning over him; telling him how handsome he is, how talented he is, how wonderful and amazing and rich he is.
And it feels nice in the moment, making his ego swell and a smirk slip onto those pink lips of his, but Tooru wants more.
He wants real compliments, praise for things that are more personal, things that only a true companion could know about. He’s tired of false flattery, of people telling him such sweet words just to get close to him for his status, his wealth, his pretty face.
He wants someone who is kind just to be kind – someone who means what they say when they compliment others.
It makes his heart race in his chest, something about their sincerity making him freeze up when his darling tells him how dedicated and passionate he is for putting in so much effort into volleyball.
It makes his breath catch a bit when they smile and sigh and tell him how proud they are when he cuts off his practice early, so that he isn’t spending hours afterwards serving and hitting until he breaks down.
He wants a darling that will be sweet and feed his somewhat precarious ego, and he’ll eagerly return the favor. He’s pouring compliments on them left and right, drowning them in kind words designed to get them flustered and bashful and so fucking adorable.
He just finds it endearing, and it’s a nice break from the usual women he meets. His darling is different, special, perfect, after all.
Perceptive
Although time has helped Tooru become more comfortable with himself, he’s still a bit hesitant to show his true self to others.
He’s worn a persona for most of his adult life, even starting way back in high school – he’s charming and smooth, always acting happy and suave.
And for the most part, he doesn’t mind – but with a select few of his friends and close companions, the world doesn’t get to know the real Tooru Oikawa.
His darling, however, is one of the very few who are on this list – and having a perceptive darling would make him fall much, much quicker.
His darling needs to be someone who is capable of catching clues as to the man that lives behind the mask; the one that still doubts himself, the one who needs constant encouragement, the one who just needs to be wanted and loved and appreciated for his hard work and his actions.
His darling needs to be able to help slowly push past the façade that he’s crafted over the years, and while they don’t need to see everything, they need to be able to make Tooru feel comfortable enough to actually be himself.
Someone who is able to pick up on his emotions, even when they aren’t terribly obvious, would be immensely attractive to him. It makes him feel seen and heard in a way that’s difficult to come by as a famous athlete, and the moment his darling showcases this ability, it’s only a matter of time before Tooru’s feelings are developing in full force.
It’s just refreshing to not have to pretend to be someone he isn’t – he’s just Tooru, not Oikawa the athlete.
It only further proves to him that his darling is made for him – they’re able to read and understand him like most people don’t, and what other possible sign could there be that they’re perfect for one another?
Honest
While Tooru’s darling must be kind, they must also be someone who isn’t afraid to tell him the truth.
All the women he meets in his daily life want to use him – whether it be his money, his fame, his looks, very few are honest about their intentions with him.
And while it makes him feel good to be wanted by so many people, Tooru often finds himself exhausted from all the effort and analysis he must undergo in order to really understand someone’s intentions.
And so, a darling that’s upfront about how they’re feeling and what they want is very, very attractive to him.
He tends to overthink and hyperfixate on things, and having a darling who leaves nothing unanswered calms his anxiety monumentally.
He doesn’t have to guess with them – he knows he can trust their word, that they won’t easily lie to him, that what they’re saying is exactly what they’re thinking.
It makes his heart flutter when they tell him that his hair looks good today, or when they tell him that they want to catch lunch sometime and hear about his latest game.
It makes him feel wanted and understood in a way that’s rare in his daily life, only furthering his obsession and fixation on his darling.
Calm
Tooru can be a bit childish. Even well into his twenties, this still rings true – he gets jealous easily and feels challenged by small comments and doubts of his ability.
His anger can get easily sparked by the right person, and having a darling that balances out these characteristics is a necessity for him.
A calmer darling helps keep him grounded, making sure that he keeps his head and doesn’t make any rash decisions.
They act as a sort of grounding rock for him – they’re able to bring him back to Earth with just a few words and a light touch to his shoulder, reminding him that some things aren’t worth his time or effort.
It’s useful, of course, but Tooru also finds it incredibly attractive when his darling is able to handle situations calmly on their own – he likes how confident they seem, how they’re able to logically think their way through a situation and not allow their emotions to get the better of them.
It’s awe-inspiring, if he’s being honest, and with every situation and interaction they successfully navigate with a smile and an even tone, Tooru only finds himself growing more and more impressed, becoming more and more interested in them until eventually it becomes all too much, their calm nature becoming something he grows dependent on in order to regulate himself.
Having his darling around becomes a necessity rather than simply a pleasure – and thus, his dependency is born, his reliance on his darling becoming one of the main facets of his obsession.
How lucky for his beloved.
GENERAL YANDERE TRAITS:
Possessive
It’s no secret that Tooru has never had to seriously work to get women. He’s attractive, a professional athlete, wealthy, famous – all in all, he’s a catch to countless fans, any of whom would be more than willing to be his partner.
And while he’s dated around, had a few serious boyfriends and girlfriends, he’s never really found the one.
For a long time, he seriously wondered if there was something wrong with him; he’s nearly 30, meeting countless new people everyday, going on dates every weekend with someone new, and he still hasn’t found a worthwhile connection with anyone long term. So why have all his friends begun slipping pretty rings onto their partners’ fingers, inviting him with a too-wide smile to attend their new house-warming party, or even posting a baby bump photo with far too many emojis?
He’s skeptical, and so while his confidence in his attractiveness doesn’t diminish by any means, Tooru slowly becomes less convinced that he’ll end up with a long term partner, a spouse, anything beyond a summer fling or a good, few month spark.
However, once his feelings for you develop, a sudden ray of hope is placed into his life. Suddenly, the prospect of dying alone doesn’t seem as imminent – how can it be, when you’re around?
How can he feel sad about his future when you’re so sweet and smart and pretty and god, that fucking smile –
He’s fallen head over heels before he even knows it, and while he exists in a somewhat honeymoon state for a while after the realization of his feelings, full of longing and dreamy smiles with red tinged cheeks and erratic heartbeats when he lays his eyes on you, quickly other feelings accompany. Ugly, disgusting feelings that Tooru hasn’t felt to such extreme degrees since high school, and never in the context of romance.
Namely, every time he sees you out in public, the adoration for the way the sunlight reflects off your hair is diminished by the coursing jealousy in his veins as he watches other men ogle you.
When he’s got you laughing at some joke he’s telling over your weekly lunch, he can’t fully enjoy the lilting sound because that damn waiter keeps coming back and asking if you want water, his body way too fucking close to you to be truly professional.
He’s suddenly acutely aware of just how beautiful and stunning you are, and how much male attention that gives you. He doesn’t blame you – no, of course not – because you’re simply perfect, and how are you supposed to know everyone wants a bite of you? No, Tooru sees you as much more helpless than that; you’re naïve, and it’s really only a matter of time before another man attempts to steal you away from him.
He knows it’s inevitable that you’ll be approached by someone else, and while they probably won’t be as handsome, wealthy, or athletically gifted as Tooru is, would you be swayed?
Is it possible that another man could win your heart, even with the setter right there in front of you all but begging for your adoration and love?
As time passes, Tooru slowly begins believing that it absolutely could happen, that any day now you could be pried away from his iron clad grip, no matter how hard he fights it. And so, he more or less panics.
He’s never really had to worry about keeping girls before, and how does it even work?
What should he do?
What should he say?
How short a leash is too short to keep you on?
He’s lost, quite frankly, and extremely embarrassed about it, because only immature, insecure men get jealous over their partner. Only men not confident in themselves panic over the thought of their beloved leaving them, and Tooru hasn’t felt crippling insecurity like this in years.
And yet, just one thought of you smiling in the direction of another man has him gritting his teeth, his arms flexing as his nails dig deeply into his fisted palms.
And so, Tooru decides that to keep you his, he’ll just have to show the world – through extravagant gifts, of course.
Suddenly there are bouquets of flowers arriving for you nearly everywhere you go – you wake up to deliveries at 8:00 sharp, a bouquet of sunflowers with a small note written in looping letters as these flowers grew, so did my dedication to you.
Necklaces with chains you’re fairly sure are made of real silver have the initial T and O engraved into them, winding around a heart and what almost appears to be a knife, though you’re not sure. Anklets, too, arrive, with sayings like angel or darling (one even featured babygirl, though you were quick to throw that particular piece of jewelry to the back of your closet, half amused at the – presumably – joke, half disturbed at the prospect of his sincerity).
You’re not sure who these gifts are coming from initially; you don’t know anything off the top of your head that would do something like this, until very suddenly it all clicks – the way Tooru looks so smug when you receive flowers while you’re out at lunch with him, the tulips your favorite color while the delivery man reads off the card Tooru had instructed him to. It pieces together when you see him sign legal forms or checks, that familiar signature and those initials jogging your memory. You only put the pieces together after Tooru’s need for your focused attention grows to new heights – physical touchiness, particularly in public spaces.
He’s always been clingy as a friend, but suddenly his hand is always at your waist, fingertips pressing in too tight for comfort.
He’s always liked hugs, but now his hugs feel strangely intimate; he’s pressing against you, burying his nose into your neck and audibly inhaling, a sigh falling from his lips as he periodically squeezes your body in his arms.
His hand is resting at the small of your back when you’re standing next to him, a steady palm to guide you through crowded spaces – though sometimes he ‘forgets what he’s doing’, as he tells you, and his hand ends up cradling the curve of your hip, dipping down to the flat of your tailbone, or jumping up and almost seeming to lightly, oh so airily trace the outline of your bra straps through your top.
(He hasn’t quite mustered up the courage to actually grope you in public, if only because he’s scared that you’ll be put off by him, and although he deeply, desperately wishes to touch you in such an intimate way, he’s a bit nervous that once he begins, he’ll never be able to stop.)
The physical affection grows extreme, his hands never leaving your body, reaching the point where it’s difficult to simply explain it away as platonic, as Tooru just being Tooru.
And yet, when you bring it up to him, those brown eyes go all wide, his mouth tilting down into a frown as he tells you he’s sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable! If you want I won’t touch you at all, I’d never want you to be unhappy around me; although, haven’t you noticed how all those creeps that used to hit on you don’t bug you anymore when I’m with you? Maybe it’s a good thing – I can be your hero and keep all the freaks away from you!
(The sincerity and conviction in the pouting of his lip and the creasing of his brow will have you swaying immediately, merely brushing off his words as being an attempt at humor rather than the truth.)
He’s not trying to be purposefully manipulative, but the words are falling out of his mouth before he can stop it, your face slowly changing as you consider his point, slowly nodding and smiling lightly, telling him he’s absolutely right, thank you Tooru, I don’t know what I’d do without you.
And just the sound of his name alone has him doubling down, touching you more, his possessive streak only growing exponentially with every permission you give to his tendencies, with every smile and giggle and fleeting touch.
How can he be expected to control himself when you look at him like that, all doe eyes and beaming smile and fuck, your hand is on his chest, if you’d just slide it down ever so slightly, following the thin line of dark brown hair you’d find a place that really, truly can’t resist you. God knows he’s tried.
Obsessive
Tooru’s always had a tendency to hyperfixate.
He’s a bit of a perfectionist, wanting to become the master at whatever he chooses to invest his time in, and once his feelings for you solidify, you are suddenly at the top of the list, very narrowly beating out volleyball.
Suddenly, Tooru finds himself yearning to learn every bit of information about you he can, every scrap feeling precious no matter how insignificant.
Sure, maybe it’s not the most important thing, but knowing how you like your toast makes his chest swell with pride.
(Do you like it lightly toasted? Darkly toasted? With butter? With jam? With peanut butter? With or without the crusts? It’s all important, so that one day when he’s routinely surprisingly you with breakfast in bed you’ll smile at him and exclaim how it’s just so perfect, giving him a soft, loving kiss and feeding him a bit of the toast, wiping away the jam from the corner of his jaw and licking it off your thumb, telling him to join you in bed because it’s so big and lonely without him and you’d been dreaming of you, Tooru, and you’ll never guess what we were doing…)
He’ll admit that maybe knowing the order you get dressed in the morning isn’t the most imperative piece of your daily life, but he’ll still recite the order in his head every night as he lays in his bed, staring at the ceiling and imagining if your routine to get undressed is the same.
He’s not picky with the information he learns, approaching every opportunity with enthusiasm, excitement, and a disturbing amount of eagerness.
And the way he goes about collecting this information isn’t limited, either – he’s not particularly partial to stalking you, if only because he’d rather you be acknowledging him and aware of his company, and because it’s difficult to simply blend in as a well-known athlete.
Rather, he falls back on some equally morally gray methods – it’s not hard to get his hands on a few for-hire personal hackers, his money spreading like water as he gets into every internet browser you’ve ever used, the history in every app you frequent, your camera roll, your documents, your notes apps and reminders.
Hell, even your settings are at his fingertips, eager brown eyes flicking through the different ways you have your backgrounds, profiles pictures, even the way you group your apps.
It’s all so interesting, his thumb endlessly scrolling through the information over and over until time starts to blur, four hours having passed without him even noticing.
He’s pouring through your watch history on all your favorite streaming platforms, compulsively watching your most viewed shows and movies over and over until he can nearly recite every line, eagerness and excitement lacing his voice with every word that leaves his mouth.
He’s analyzing anything he can get his fingers on, endlessly fascinated and entertained by anything and everything that even remotely pertains to you. You’re like some drug he’s found himself addicted to, his body physically craving you, the desire to always be thinking of you and with you nearly suffocating.
But he’s a busy man, and he doesn’t want to scare you off, so he can’t just constantly be around you, constantly following you or pressing for your attention – it would scare you, he’s sure, so he settles for almost living vicariously through you.
By watching your favorite shows and looking at your search histories, it’s almost like he’s next to you, like he’s spending time with you, like he’s an active part of your life. It’s almost like you’re together, the thing he yearns for more than anything.
And even once you’re under his roof, stolen and kept soundly by his side, Tooru’s obsessive tendencies don’t disappear – now that you know, now that you’re aware of the depth of his infatuation, why should he bother hiding just how much he knows about you?
Why should he take the time and effort to mask just how expansive his knowledge on you goes? Sure, it may scare you a bit, but he simply can’t hold himself back anymore – you have to let him show you just how dedicated he is to you.
You must let him cook you your favorite meals (perfectly done, even strange flavor combinations you don’t remember mentioning to him), let him rub your back (with that one exact movement he knows you love), let him play music for you (your favorite songs, of course), and let him buy new clothes for you (they’re the perfect sizes, your favorite colors, your favorite styles).
He just wants to please you, to get you looking at him with admiration, fondness, joy, and he’s willing to put every scrap of information he’s gleaned about you to use.
He wants to spoil you and make you the happiest you’ve ever been, all so you’ll smile at him and compliment him, so that you’ll praise him and kiss him and tell him that he’s perfect, you’re everything I could ever want Tooru.
He craves your validation, so please, please let him please you – let him stare at you for hours at a time, taking in every detail of your face, every mannerism of your movements, every inflection of your voice.
It makes him happy, makes him feel needed, wanted, like he’s actually contributing something, like he's treating you like a good, loving, loyal man – please, let yourself need him.
Because he needs you more than you could ever know.
Clingy
Of course, while Tooru’s jealousy and obsessiveness regarding you is certainly not an easy load to bear, by far the hardest part of being the center of his devotion is the touching.
He’s always been clingy, even back before his feelings for you had developed – as friends, he was texting you near constantly, all kinds of stupid videos and jokes making your phone light up with notifications at the most inconvenient times.
He’s always been physically affectionate with you, whether it be hugs or ruffling your hair or lighthearted shoves, the actions never feeling forced or unnatural or strange. But once his feelings develop, things change.
The clinginess doesn’t change – no, if anything it just gets stronger, the urge to be around you and have your attention and feel you growing more and more pressing by the day.
No, the thing that changes is the atmosphere that comes alongside his growing desperation.
What used to be a small, casual hug of greeting when you meet up to eat becomes a very tense three second hug, his hands settling firmly at your waist and his brown hair tickling your neck with how deeply he buries his face against you.
(Often you think you can hear him sniffling, as if he was smelling, as if he was breathing you in, but the moment passes too quickly for you to really be sure.)
What used to be a casual holding of hands when he guides you through a crowded space becomes him snaking his fingers between yours, his palms clammy and sweaty, his fingers gripping onto yours tight, tightly enough to sometimes be painful.
What used to be flirtatious comments with very little meaning that he’d occasionally throw your way just to tease you become real, all traces of a joke erased from his tone as he tells you that you’re more beautiful than any flower after you mention how lovely the nearby flowerpot is.
Things slowly begin feeling different the longer his infatuation carries on, to the point where you will have to actively start dismissing these changes as merely being in your head – of course Tooru isn’t acting weird when he pulls you against his hip so that you’re walking side by side down the street.
Why would that be weird?
Sure, the street is nearly deserted so there’s no chance of running into anyone, and sure there’s no cracks or holes in the walkway to warrant you having to be careful, but it’s not weird.
(Just don’t look down – the dress pants he’d donned for the occasion – your date, he likes to think – do a very poor job of hiding just how your body heat is affecting him, of just how the way you fit against his side is making him feel.)
You’ll slowly get the feeling that Tooru is pushing your boundaries, every day finding a way to poke and prod just a bit more, to blur the lines of friend and boyfriend just a hair, just to see how far he can get without you calling him out for his behavior.
And when you eventually do reach your limit, wherever it may be, don’t breath too heavy a sigh of relief – because while he’ll try to tone it down as much as possible (he has to, because when you look so upset with him it makes his heart physically ache, the words of agreement already slipping out of his mouth because he’d do anything to get you smiling at him again), his clinginess is nothing compared to how it is once he’s stolen you away.
Once you’re living under the same roof as him, things will very, very quickly get out of hand. Any semblance of personal space and boundaries you may have are merely a suggestion to him, something of the past that can be plowed right past because now you’re his, and he’s yours.
Now there’s no reason to try and hold himself back – you know how he feels now, the level of desperation with which he wants you, so why should he bother trying to save his decorum or keep things platonic? He’s waited for so very long to touch you as he pleases, and while he won’t force anything too extreme on you, you will be subject his physical affections.
He’s constantly got a hand on your body, whether that’s resting on your shoulder, your waist, your thigh, your cheek, your ass, anything at all. He’s always hugging you, letting his long arms wrap around your shoulders as lets out a sound much too similar to a moan to be comfortable, pressing his body directly into yours so that he can feel every inch of you against him and feel more connected to you.
He’s always pressing kisses against your hands and legs, letting his lips travel from your fingertips up to your elbows, down over your shoulders to your belly button, down the slope of your thighs and finishing on the curve of your ankle, those brown eyes half lidded in far too much passion as you shiver in disgust.
He’s always trying to get you to return his affections, too – it’s great to hug you and sit you in his lap, but he wants you to want it, to want him, to want his touch.
He tries to keep all the affection pleasurable for you, to have you happy and smiling and craving the human contact, because the only thing worse than you rejecting his love is you rejecting his touch.
And so it’s not uncommon for him to whisper to you as he’s got his arm hooked around your waist, lying on his side with you spooned up to him if you’re enjoying this, does this feel good for you?
(His voice is unsure, hesitant, almost afraid, your response the difference between his heart breaking or beating out of his chest.)
He’s incredibly vulnerable when he’s touching you, his desperation and the raw need he feels for you bleeding out of him in ways that make it absolutely impossible for you to ignore. How can you? When he’s mindlessly playing with your fingers as he tells you about the upcoming game this weekend, he can’t stop marveling at the softness of your fingers against his calloused ones, his skin brushing yours even as you try to pull away.
When he’s clutching onto the shirt – his shirt – adorning your figure as he holds you against his chest on the couch, you’ll notice how his grip doesn’t falter for even a moment, staying steadfast and firm and strong. Frankly, even with all the rage and betrayal you feel towards Tooru, his touchiness and clinginess will likely be the source of the growing pity you feel for him.
Because really, isn’t he just so pathetic? He’s an absolute mess unless he's touching you – anxiety overwhelms him, panicked thoughts about whether you actually love him, about whether he’s even worthy of your love, whether he’s a talented player or an number of other insecurities that suddenly come racing to the surface.
So really, while it’s not ideal, you’d best get used to his handsiness – it’s intense, to say the least, and while he’ll never force himself onto you, he will force his affection onto you.
It’s better for you to simply let it happen – enjoy the human contact while you can, because when he leaves for the long, long trips for series of away games, you’ll find yourself missing your captor’s touch.
Isn’t it all just so sick?
DEALING WITH RIVALS:
Tooru is, unfortunately, a naturally jealous man. He’s always been both envious of others and painfully aware of his own shortcoming in every aspect of his life. Volleyball, friendships, even his own love life have left him with a bitter taste in his mouth, always acutely aware of what other people do better, what they have, frustration eating him alive because why can’t he be better or have what they have?
It’s unhealthy and as he’s gotten older he’s gotten better at keeping the jealousy at bay, but he’s still victim to the green-eyed monster much more often than he’d care to admit.
And where you’re concerned, this natural tendency only gets worse, his possessiveness flaring to worrying degrees when another man so much as looks at you.
(His jealousy is actually one of the major reasons why he even realized that his feelings for you transformed from platonic to romantic, his love for you changing from laughing at your jokes to wanting you gasping and writhing and needing him.)
Though, while desperation guides Tooru in most ways regarding your relationship, he still has enough of a grip on his lucidity to know that being jealous of every man that interacts with you is neither reasonable nor attractive to you.
Surely, other men must want you – you’re gorgeous, after all, sexy and perfect and everything he could ever want. Other men must see these qualities in you too; if they didn’t, they’d be stupid in Tooru’s opinion.
And yet, particularly in the beginning of his obsession, Tooru tries desperately to fight the rising jealousy he feels for you.
It’s not normal to want to throttle the man you make eye contact with on the street – you didn’t even speak, just merely catch eyes for a brief moment. So, instead of marching up to the man and socking him in the face like he wishes, Tooru just grits his teeth, pulling you closer to his side and asking you a question, hoping to distract you from ever even thinking of that stranger again.
Instead of yelling at the waiter that smiles just a beat too long at you after you order your meal, he just squeezes his hand into a fist, smiling tightly and asking you about coming to the important game he’s playing this weekend, emphasizing that he always plays much better when you’re there.
He’s always trying to play off his jealousy, but the result of his constant bottling of his emotions means that when the bottle finally fills, it overflows – Tooru isn’t normally scary to you, but when the jealousy finally explodes, you’ll find yourself unnerved by one of your closest friends, the man he becomes seeming utterly unfamiliar to you.
The volleyball stadiums are always loud after Club Atletico wins, and you’re sure no matter how many times you come to these games you’ll never get used to the noise.
It’s not hard to slip out of the bleachers and navigate back towards a hallway deep in the bowels of the stadium, the winding halls leaving anyone else surely confused. But you’ve met with Tooru after these matches enough times to know the path like the back of your hand – which is why the presence of another person makes you immediately cock a brow.
The man’s looking at his phone, his face visibly confused, and as your footsteps catch his attention, he looks up at you with relief. He’s quick to ask you how to get back to the main seating area, because he’d wandered off to find a bathroom and now he was truly lost.
The explanation and the exasperated expression he wears gets you chuckling a bit, a smile forming on your lips as you explain the directions to get back upstairs.
He looks lost merely three directions in, and immediately you’re laughing a bit again. He's pocketed his phone by this point, a hand coming up to scratch at the back of his neck sheepishly, his voice shy as he asks you to repeat the instructions.
You only get about midway through before a hand places itself at your waist, a sudden pulling motion sending you stumbling back slightly and knocking into something firm and tall. Immediately you jump, looking up to be met with the strong jaw of Tooru, his lips set into a thin line and his brown eyes narrowed on the stranger.
The stranger immediately sucks in a gasp and splutters something out about being a huge fan, I’ve even got your jersey on! You were so good out there, those sets were insane –
He’s cut off a harsh laugh from Tooru, and your confusion only deepens. Tooru turns to look at you, a soft smile quirking up his lips.
Will you go get a towel for me? I’m awfully tired.
You blink but slowly nod, unsure where this sudden request was coming from. As you walk off, Tooru watches you, all the while ignoring the nervous fiddling of the man in front of him.
As soon as you turn the corner towards the training rooms, Tooru’s smile drops and he turns back to face the man. His voice is cold and condescending as he sighs.
Are you always this irritating to talk to?
The stranger’s jaw drops a bit, his nervousness back in full force as he takes a step back, one hand playing with the hem of the jersey.
Oh, uh, sorry, I was just getting some directions from your friend but I’ll be going now…
His steps are quick and rushed as he tries to take off down the hallway, but he freezes when Tooru’s voice calls out again.
Next time, you should save yourself some time and not bother talking to someone so obviously out of your league. It makes you look awfully pathetic, just so you know. Get going, I’m sure your mom’s worried that you haven’t come home to her basement yet tonight.
At that, the man starts moving again, and Tooru notes with a distinct sense of pride that his shoulders are shaking slightly, no doubt both his confidence and idolization of Tooru shattering.
Tooru takes a deep breath and looks up towards the ceiling, letting his eyes close briefly.
It’d been an extreme response, he’ll admit – you’d been standing a good three feet away from the man when he’d happened upon the scene, the man visibly thankful for the directions Tooru could hear you giving, but it didn’t matter.
It couldn’t matter, not when the adrenaline of the game was still rushing through his veins, not when the excitement and giddiness of seeing you was still potent, not when he’d been looking forward to hearing your praises and maybe even getting a hug, the jersey of his that he’d insisted you wear making you look particularly alluring today.
(Seeing the lettering of his last name across your back certainly didn’t hurt, his uniform feeling too tight and too hot.)
The jealousy had just sudden hit him in the moment, a rushing sort of anger that left him only barely able to realize that he needed to get you away now, that the words he’d be spewing at the unfortunate man who’d stolen your attention would surely leave you pissed beyond repair.
He breathes deeply, the anger still swimming in his veins, though releasing it out onto that poor fan was probably not the best choice.
Soon your footsteps are echoing in Tooru’s ears, and his eyes immediately fly open to watch you walk down the hallway, towel in hand and a worried expression on your face.
Are you okay, Tooru?
Your voice is an angel’s, he’s sure of it, and when you look at him with such worry and sincerity, it nearly makes his knees buckle. You’re so damn pretty, and as he gulps and nods, thanking you for the towel, he can’t help but feel a bit smug.
You’re his, damnit, and while telling the man off and losing a fan probably wasn’t the best price for this feeling, Tooru wouldn’t trade it for the world.
And when you go in for a hug, pressing yourself against him (pressing all of yourself against him), Tooru can only wrap his arms around you and return the hug, keeping his grip tight even as you try to pull back.
He’s a jealous man, yes, but when you smell and feel and look this good, can he really be blamed?
TAKING HIS DARLING AWAY:
Stealing you away isn’t something that immediately occurs to Tooru. He’s got a bit of a hectic schedule; being a professional athlete means an absurd amount of time away from home, an odd sleeping schedule, and a high amount of security needed to ensure his safety.
And frankly, he just doesn’t want to kidnap you – he’s a control freak in many ways regarding you, what with his extreme clinginess and the jealousy constantly eating him alive, but he doesn’t get any pleasure from the idea of controlling you.
And so, he holds off for as long as physically possible to keep from snatching you up for himself – there’s something incredibly alluring about you when you feel free and happy, and he’s terrified that if he were to kidnap you, all those smiles and your pretty laughter that gets his heart racing would disappear forever.
He’s not particularly delusional, and he’s sure you wouldn’t reciprocate his feelings if he were to drug you and have you wake up in pretty, lacy chains.
He’s not stupid, and he likes the concept of being able to go out with you far too much to really desire kidnapping you. He likes showing you off too much; his jealousy is all consuming, sure, but being able to parade you around on his arm and show the world that you’re with him is enough to stroke both his ego and his pride, making him suck in an uneven, stuttered breath.
He likes being able to take you out for spontaneous luncheons and dinners, swinging by your modest apartment (one he insists you could do better than, if you’d just let him pay your rent like he keeps offering) in his fancy black car, winking and telling you to hop in, pretty girl, we’re getting Italian! And if you eat the whole pasta bowl I’ll be so impressed I’ll even buy you some of that fancy gelato I know you love.
(Really, he’ll buy it for you no matter what, but he likes the idea that you’re eating enough, that you’re truly feeding yourself, that you’re healthy and safe and still alive and still his his his -)
He likes that he can just shoot you a text and tell you to pack for a tropical destination, requesting your presence at the nearest airport in less than an hour because he just got an extra ticket to the training camp his team is attending in the Caribbean.
He likes the excitement of it all, the way your eyes always get so big and wide and cute when he tells you about the latest adventure he’s dragging you along with or the latest thing he’s planning to buy for you.
He likes the way you always get so bashful and starstruck, utterly shocked and so grateful that you struggle to get your words out, because god the attention feels good.
Seeing you smile at him like that will never fail to send shivers racing across every inch of his body, his fingers trembling and a lump forming in his throat because oh please please please never stop looking at him like this…
It’s just too good for him to willingly end, and he’s terrified that the moment he makes a move towards keeping you in a more secure location, the magic of your happiness and fondness towards him will disappear, leaving you bitter and spiteful towards him.
And really, that’s the worst possible scenario for him – with the exception of one very, very large scenario that could actually convince him to fully kidnap you. That is, when you tell him gently one evening over cocktails and a platter of cheese, meats, and olives that you’re leaving Argentina, he goes very still and very pale.
It’s a mixture of terror, rage, and genuine panic that envelopes him, that leaves him scarily quiet for the rest of the evening, that gets him gripping the steering wheel of his car so tight that his knuckles turn white.
It’s that same horrible, gut-wrenching mixture of emotions that compel him to drive back to your apartment late that same night, his face blank as he uses the spare key you’d given him a while ago to quietly enter, already holding the chloroform soaked rag in his pocket and approaching your bedroom fast, his footsteps almost eager enough to wake you up.
All too soon he’s got your limp body in his backseat, brown eyes glancing frantically between the road in front of him and your form in the rear view mirror, a new mix of foreboding and excitement making his gut twist and turn.
You’ll be angry, surely, but Tooru knows this was his only choice – you were leaving him. What else could he have possibly done?
Being Tooru’s captive will often leave you feeling disoriented, as if you’re walking along a familiar path that’s been left to decompose and rot. Everything feels different and alien and wrong – leaving you with a false sense of comfort that’s shattered at every turn.
It’s strange, because you know Tooru – he’s been your friend for years, but as you come to terms with the extent of his obsession with you, the man you thought you knew slips away from view, leaving you with this husk of him, looking the same but acting nothing like him.
There’s still traces of him – in how he talks to you late at night, curling your body up beside his as he plays with your fingers, his voice a murmur in your ear as he rants about his teammates, the topic feeling so normal and familiar that it almost makes you cry.
There’s traces of him when he puts his hand on your back to guide you into another room, the familiar curve of his palm making your body want to relax and lean into him only for the sudden squeeze he gives you to jolt you right out of that comfort, to remind you that no that isn’t his phone corner poking into your hip like you’d always thought.
There’s traces of him, but by and large Tooru just becomes too much – he’s too touchy, too demanding, too insistent that you be looking at him and only him. He’s always got his hands on you, pressing into your skin or playing with your hair or tracing the shape of your lips and cheeks.
(It’s more of a comfort for him rather than a sexual desire – of course, he very much wants to have you naked and trembling and moaning his name like a prayer, but when he pulls your body against his or rests his forehead against your back, it’s mostly just to make sure that you’re still there, his anxiety about being away from you and losing you calming down just a hair because you’re right fucking here.)
He’s always got those eyes trained on you, watching your every move like a hawk, making shivers roll up your spine no matter how much you get used to the feeling of being observed.
(Being watched while bathing was, admittedly, the most difficult adjustment. He hasn’t forced himself on you – something you’re beyond thankful for - but it’s still jarring to be running the soapy water over your body while he watches from beside the bathtub, his cheeks tinted pink and his voice soft and worryingly husky as he tells you that he’s always loved the scent of your soap, did you know I could smell it back when I used to hug you? That’s why I always put my face against the right side of your neck – you always put extra there. Did you do that for me?)
He’s always talking to you, his voice alternating between teasing with comments that are just a tad bit too sincere to feel like a joke and low and heady, like there’s something on the tip of his tongue that he desperately wants to tell you but just can’t quite force out.
(The compliments he gives you remind you of the old Tooru, but there’s always a certain level of detail added to them that makes your skin crawl – he’ll tell you that you’re so beautiful, your face is perfect, when I sleep it’s all I see…)
It’s scary and weird and his clinginess will have you wanting to scratch your eyes out and claw at him just to get a bit of space, but the reality is that as time passes you’ll slowly grow more and more conflicted about your feelings towards him.
He’s kidnapped you, stolen you away and locked you up away from the rest of the world, and he’s spent countless months collecting fragments of your hair and your old toothbrushes and taken photographs of you and countless other things you’ve yet to discover.
But he treats you well, all things considered, and the more time passes from the kidnapping, your rage slowly cools until all that’s left is an overwhelming pity for the man who claims to love you more than he loves himself.
Because really, isn’t Tooru awfully pathetic?
Isn’t it sad that he needs you so badly that he can’t function unless you’re around, unless he’s felt your touch, unless he’s heard your pretty voice say his name?
Isn’t it pathetic that he keeps you clutched so tightly to his chest at night that you can hardly breath?
You’ll be feeling sorry for him before you even realize it, some part of you desperate to recognize him as your Tooru, as the man you’ve come to love and care for as friends.
Eventually that part of you will win out, and while Tooru feels a bit guilty for having essentially conditioned you into accepting him, it doesn’t really matter – because you want him now. You’re choosing him, accepting him, needing him like he needs you, and that’s really all he could ask for – he just wants you to love him, and while the methodology may be a little dirty, Tooru’s only ever cared about results.
Because when you smile at him again and hesitantly press your lips against his, he swears he’s died and gone to heaven – because you finally, finally want him too.
PUNISHMENTS:
Similarly to his feelings regarding kidnapping you, Tooru isn’t the biggest fan of punishments.
His dependence on you is so strong and so deeply inlaid into his person that harming you just feels wrong, carnally evil in every form of the word. The concept of physically harming you makes him feel sick and his hands immediately rush out to clutch onto you, to tuck you against his chest, to lift a finger to your pulse point to make absolute sure that you’re still with him.
He’s terrified that you’ll somehow die or abandon him, and even just a simple scratch or a light bruise would be too much for Tooru to handle. And so, punishing you is absolutely off the table – his ultimate goal is for you to develop positive feelings for him again, to maybe even love him, after all.
But Tooru is only human, and so while he won’t ever physically lash out at you or force you into any severe, serious punishments (or humiliating ones, luckily enough), he will fall back onto something more subtle, something more purposeful – he’s not necessarily manipulative with you in your day-to-day life, but he’s not embarrassed to play every single card in his favor in order to get you feeling positively disposed towards him, even if he doesn’t deserve it.
It starts off genuinely unintentional - because he really values honesty in your relationship. He wants you to be honest when you’re telling him that you love him, that he’s pretty, that you need him.
He wants things to be real and raw – except, you’re still so angry with him, your eyes so betrayed when you look at him, and it makes him want to rake his nails into his skin because that pain would feel so much better than how your hatred feels.
And so, after the first few times you try to escape the nice penthouse he’s gone through the trouble of decorating with things he knows you love, Tooru starts getting a bit desperate.
Can’t you see that he only stole you away because it was his only choice?
Can’t you understand that he didn’t want to do this, but there was no other way to keep you safe and secure and his?
He starts panicking, terrified that despite all his efforts to be kind and inviting and spoil you (both with material goods and constant affection, though you haven’t asked for either), you still won’t ever return his feelings, or even harbor positive feelings towards him ever again.
And so, with furrowed brows and a sinking feeling in his gut, he turns towards fake tears and only half-true words to get you feeling bad for him, to get you wanting him like he wants you to. Like he needs you to.
Tooru’s initially not sure what to say when he walks through the front entrance of the penthouse.
It’d only been a weekend tournament; a simple Friday, Saturday, Sunday round-robin type event that was a few hours away – nothing horribly long. And yet he’d been so, so eager to return to you, to feel your body against his and hear your voice and smell your scent and just see you that he’d literally sprinted from the car, all the way up fifteen flights of stairs to his apartment.
And this is what he walks in on?
You, with a dull butter knife in your hands, the metal bent and warped while you stare at him with wide eyes and a heaving chest?
It’s painfully obvious what’s going on – you were trying to get the door open, pushing and pulling so hard with the knife that you’d nearly broken it.
You’d nearly broken it trying to get away from him, in other words. His duffel bag drops to the ground, his fingers frozen and trembling as he stares wide eyed at you.
Angel? What – what’s going on?
You don’t respond, too nervous and scared of how he’ll react to make a move. But Tooru recovers first, rushing forward and swatting the knife out of your hand before pulling you into a much too tight hug.
His hands are still shaking as one rubs up and down your back, the other situated on the crown of your head.
Were you trying to leave me?
You start to answer, your lips moving to speak against the fabric of his shirt, but he cuts you off.
Were you trying to get rid of me? To run away from me?
And there’s something in his voice that makes your shoulders shake, a sudden bout of rage simmering through you.
Yes, Tooru, I’m trying to get out of this stupid fucking apartment that you keep me trapped in! Please, you have to let me go, this is wrong! This isn’t right – this isn’t healthy! You have to understand! How do you not-
He cuts you off with a small sob, and although you know you shouldn’t, some part of you pauses for just a fraction of a second. Your voice stalls for just a moment, but Tooru jumps into the brief moment of silence.
Stop it! Stop it, please, don’t say that.
He’s sniffling, pressing his cheeks against your head and clutching you even tighter.
You’re right, I know you’re right. I’m a monster and a freak for doing this to you. I know that, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. Please, you don’t understand – I hate that I’ve done this to you. I hate that I’ve made you sad and forced you to stay with me, but you have to understand that I can’t stop.
He sobs again, and you notice his voice is wobbly and something wet is touching your ear.
I can’t stop myself – I can’t stop wanting you and needing you, and I think I would die if I never saw you again. Please understand, I’m pathetic but I need you to stay sane – just, just let me love you like we used to, okay? Please, I promise I can take good care of you – I can make you happy! Just give me some more time…
Something in your chest feels tight at his words, and before you know it you’re reaching around his torso yourself, your movements hesitant as you loosely hug him back. He gasps lightly against your hair, and you can feel him swallow.
I hate you. Your whisper is soft and quiet, and although the words make his chest ache, Tooru smiles.
I love you, he tells you, pressing a kiss against your hair.
You both stay like that for a while, only the distant sound of traffic from many stories below you filling the empty air of the entryway. You don’t know what to say, or even what you could say – Tooru’s a monster, yes, but there’s something about the rawness of him in this moment that makes you yearn and ache for the old Tooru, the one you knew before he started developing this ‘love’ he claims to have for you.
Something about him feels familiar and unbearably sad, and when you pull back and he stares at you, those brown eyes puffy and tear-stained, you can’t find it in yourself to fully pull away.
Because isn’t he still Tooru Oikawa? Isn’t he awfully pathetic? Isn’t it sad how badly he craves you, how his every touch and word and look make you feel as if you were the most precious thing on Earth, as if you were the most prized woman he’s ever met?
It’s wrong and you can hate yourself for it all you want, but as he sniffles and bites his lip and lets his fingers dig into your sides, you won’t be able to deny it: you couldn’t leave him, even if the door was wide open. He’s a monster, sure, but maybe so are you for liking the way you’re so unconditionally needed by someone as famous, beautiful and successful as him.
Meanwhile, Tooru can’t help but internally rejoice at the feeling of you in his arms, at the feeling of you hugging him, and at the knowledge that he can literally see your walls breaking down, getting one step closer to you truly accepting him – to you truly loving him.
Even if the tears he’s manufactured are fake, it doesn’t matter. All that matters is you.
And after the next tournament, when he comes home and you’re lying on the couch reading the same book for the tenth time rather than picking at the locks, Tooru decides that perhaps the show he’d put on (or rather, exaggerated, as he truly was desperate for you to not leave him) was worth it.
Anything for you is worth it – as long as you keep looking at him and touching him and wanting him.
OVERALL DANGER:
6/10
What makes Tooru dangerous is the fact that he’s absolutely dependent on you in every sense of the word. Over time, his self-worth becomes intertwined with your opinion of him, with your presence and role in his life.
He’s not exaggerating or being obnoxious when he tells you that he absolutely needs you – he can’t go for more than a few hours without feeling your skin against his, otherwise he gets anxious and jittery and on edge, snapping at others and pacing and worrying so much that it makes his chest physically ache.
He can’t go more than a few minutes without hearing your voice, otherwise he has to see you and be near you to make sure that you’re still with him, that you haven’t left him or abandoned him or any number of other things. He just needs you, so much so that it honestly scares him.
He’s not particularly violent or condescending, and aside from the kidnapping and forced touching, life with Tooru honestly won’t be so terrible. Sure, he hugs you too tight and kisses you too hard and clings to you in a way that makes your skin crawl, but eventually you’ll grow to become just as dependent as he is on you.
Because when he’s your only human contact, can you really afford to be so picky? When he’s the only one you can see and speak with and feel, you’ll slowly become complacent and even happy when he’s around.
Stockholm Syndrome will eventually make you a willing captive, and Tooru couldn’t be happier – you’re finally treating him as a lover, embracing him and letting him dote on you and care for you, and what more could he really ask for?
You’ll eventually just give up the fight – he’s a pathetic, sad man with such deeply rooted insecurities about himself and his abilities that the pity will nearly drive you mad.
And all the while, Tooru will welcome you with open arms – you can pity him as much as you like, as long as you stay with him.
Please.
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I’ve recently seen some The Rocky Horror Picture Show discourse. And like people are questioning if Rocky Horror is transmisogynistic. Of course it does. Dr. Frank-N-Furter is intentionally a transmisogynistic villain. That’s the point.
It’s intended as ironic of course, as deliberate camp. The musical is intended as a parody of old sci-fi and horror movies, mixed with a camp drag aesthetic inspired by the contemporary glam rock movement. The mad scientist villains in the movies being parodied were often queer-coded, and vaguely effeminate.
So to parody that, Frank-n-Furter goes far beyond the queer-coding, and is outrageously effeminate and evil. He rapes people, kills them with an axe and serves them for dinner and force-fems them to take part in his climactic stage show. He is a Frankenstein parody, who literally makes an artificial man in order to fuck him (a joke about Frankenstein I’ve seen on tumblr). And does it all while wearing stockings, a bustier and heavy make-up. He is deliberately the ultimate evil man in a dress trope, referencing Psycho and all effeminate mad scientists in media.
That Frank-N-Furter isn’t explicitly a trans woman doesn’t matter. The musical deliberately blurs the line. The line “I’m just a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual, Transylvania” is like a perfect encapsulation of how horror movies treat transfemininity. “Men in dresses” (transvestites) trans women (transsexual) and a symbol of predatory horror movie villainy (Transylvania) are all conflated, making a pun of out how they all begin with “trans”.
Of course, it’s intended to be ironic. It’s a parody of queer-coded villainy in old horror movies by turning it up to eleven, so that you can’t take it seriously. The whole movie has this drag show camp aesthetic that it celebrates, and the supposed representatives of heteronormativity, Brad and Janet are turned in the end. Frank-N-Furter becomes a symbol of a hedonistic queer liberation “Give yourself over to absolute pleasure.. Don’t dream it, be it.”
This is the clear intent of Rocky Horror, and it’s how it became a “queer classic”. Does it work? I’ll admit that I enjoy the movie version. The glam rock aesthetic is fun, the songs are catchy, and they keep coming at a quick pace. A lot of it is admittedly that I love the old horror and sci-fi movies it’s parodying, so my cultural touchstones are similar. I’m the kind of person to get a thrill out of knowing that Frank-N-Furter at one point uses the exact same prop that Peter Cushing used in the second Hammer Frankenstein movie.
That is a different question however from how well it succeeds at subverting the transmisogynistic tropes it handles. Even in the most sympathetic possible account of the musical, it’s doing the equivalent of handling live grenades. Is it the creators tropes to subvert in the first place? Is it the fans?
Let’s talk about Rocky Horror’s creator, Richard O’Brien. He is certainly a weird and contradictory person, he identifies as a third gender and “70% male and 30% female“, and is using estrogen. So arguably he is a transfem enby and thus transmisogyny-affected. But he’s also a transmisogynist who doesn’t believe trans women are “real women”.( I would like to know what exact percentage of “female” as a transfem person turns you into a bad fake trans woman.)
Of course the important thing about O’Brien is that he is rich. He is in a vastly different class position than the majority of transfems. So while he may be taking estrogen and living as a third gender, he is simultaneously isolated by his own wealth from the effects of the transmisogyny he bolsters in the media (see Caitlyn Jenner for another example of a wealthy transfem doing the same thing).
And O’Brien is rich because Rocky Horror is a huge success. The stage show has seen tons of productions, the original ran for 7 years in the West End, and the movie is a slow but certain money maker, with probably the longest theatrical run out of any movie in history. He is swimming in residuals.
This raises the more interesting question of Rocky Horror’s position in the wider culture, and it’s status as “queer media”. It’s a movie which is just not passively watched but celebrated and performed by its fandom. People show up in cosplay to showings, “shadow casts” perform while the movie plays. And of course the original stage musical is still performed.
So we have to ask ourselves, what are people performing? And who is performing it? And I’ve already answered the former question earlier. Rocky Horror is largely an ironic performance of transmisogyny. And the fact is, the majority of people doing that performance are not the main targets of transmisogyny. They are largely TME cishet, queer and trans people. It’s “ironic” transmisogyny to be sure, I think most fans of Rocky Horror who have any understanding of what it is doing view Frank-N-Furter as the true hero of the show. But is it really their thing to be ironic about? Are transmisogyny-exempt people really the people who should reclaim with irony and camp transmisogynistic tropes in horror media? I don’t think so, and that’s why there is so much resentment about Rocky Horror from transfems. And it’s creator doesn’t help, because while he’s arguably transfem, he also spreads transmisogyny in the media.
It illustrates a lot of things, for example how imprecise “queer” is as a description of people. It’s an umbrella term, and does group together people who have much in common. But it also erases the material differences within the community. Queer people aren’t all equally oppressed.
So Rocky Horror status as queer media, as a campy celebration of queerness and parody of anti-queer tropes in genre films is kinda grating. Because it enables TME queer people to perform and celebrate Rocky Horror, because they are queer and it’s about “queerness”, when there are specifically transmisogynistic tropes parodied in the musical. It isn’t really their place to do so.
It appropriates specific transmisogynistic tropes in the media by thoughtlessly subsuming it into the general anti-queerness which it is part of.
Of course there are transfems who got to explore their gender at Rocky Horror showings. But I think the reason they did that is because mtf crossdressing is accepted as part of a camp ironic performance in such a context. It makes it feel safer to perform femininity in public, because you can backtrack and say it’s purely ironic. That’s no different from the comedy crossdressing in American Halloween parties, and I think we can all agree those are often transmisogynistic.
And of course, Rocky Horror is an example of how cis men can perform femininity, and get celebrated for it in mainstream society, while escaping the effects of transmisogyny that transfems experience, and in fact often furthering that transmisogyny. It’s often a (negative) performance of transfemininity, in which actual transfems play no part and are mocked.
Tim Curry is a very good example. He made his career from playing Frank-N-Furter, and he probably couldn’t have done that if he was actually transfem, and not just crossdressing for an ironic performance on stage and screen. Like I don’t have anything against him in particular, quite the opposite, he’s one of my favourite actors, love him in everything from Clue to Muppet Treasure Island to Gabriel Knight. My objection is to the patriarchal and transmisogynistic system that favors cishet men like him.
Speaking of crossdressing on stage, the drag culture which Rocky Horror is inspired by of course has a complex history. It’s deeply rooted in both African-American and queer culture, and transfems have played major roles in drag. But Rocky Horror is if anything even an appropriation of drag culture. It represents drag’s commercialization and recuperation into the mainstream. It took drag out of the gay bars being raided by the police and onto the more respectable West End stage, making a lot of money in the process.
Rocky Horror beyond any qualities it has as a stage and film musical, due to its popularity represents a lot of complex issues. It’s important to queer culture, but it also represents the commercialization and recuperation of queer drag into the cishet mainstream. And within the queer community, it is a shining example of how TME queers can appropriate specifically transfem struggles as their own. It shows how cis men can gain wealth and fame performing transmisogynistic caricatures (even if they are ironic and don’t mean it).
I’m not saying if you enjoy the musical that you should stop enjoying it. But maybe if you are TME, Dr Frank-N-Furter is not your “problematic queer icon” to reclaim.
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"Perc@beth is the gold standard and no-one is doing it like them."
EDIT: Perc@beth fans, this post is not for you. Keep scrolling. DNI.
Umm yea. I agree.
I haven't seen any other couple that's equally as unhealthy and abusive get so much praise and be treated as such a high goal and aspiration.
People will be saying this like the following events never happen:
Percy scared Annabeth to tears. She was crying and begging him. And they never :) talk :) about :) it. :)
Percy has been suicidal since he met Annabeth. In BoO he attempted suicide and Annabeth said nothing, noticed nothing and did nothing to help/support her boyfriend. In fact, she ignores him and only talks to Piper. (I'm not saying she shouldn't talk to Piper - she can that's fine - but she needs to talk to Percy. And she doesnt).
Annabeth judo flips Percy and that's treated as girl power and a normal thing. When Percy is an abuse survivor who once lived in fear of his step father beating him into unconsciousness.
Annabeth likes to keep Percy on his toes (her words) which makes Percy constantly anxious and nervous: he can never tell what she's thinking and he's scared of fucking up to the point that he feels like roadkill (his words).
The one time Percy brings up his abusive step father (possibly seeking comfort and support while they were in literal hell) Annabeth laughs it off as a joke. He never correct her assumption and shares the truth.
Annabeth is unapologetically rude to Percy's family (Sally and Paul being the exception). She outright says eww and gross while Tyson compliments her, and she's incredibly rude to him. She spends the entire first book constantly telling Percy that Poseidon is dirty and rotten and makes Percy second guess the gifts Poseidon gives him (there's always a price for gifts). And this is while Percy's mom Sally is dead and Percy is seeking his father for answers/help/support.
Percy constantly thinks Annabeth is going to hurt him when she looks mad/emotional (ttc - she looked like she wanted to judo flip me, botl - I thought she was going to punch me) and you'd think that's just Percy's unresolved trauma from his step father (who, remember, threatened to beat Percy into unconsciousness) but then she actually judo flips Percy in MoA, proving that it's not just irrational fear. It's the cycle of abusive relationships continuing.
Percy has shit self esteem, and doesn't think he's worthy of being Annabeth's boyfriend. The way cotg is written (from the bits I read) is that Percy comes off as the problem boyfriend that needs his girlfriend to constantly help/fix him. She does nothing (from what I've seen) to help Percy or direct Percy to someone who can help with this.
Annabeth pushes Percy to choose between her and his family (Sally, Paul and Estelle). Percy genuinely wants to stay back in Manhatten to be an older brother to Estelle but no. He already thinks he's unworthy, so he'd be horrible to say no to her, right? Not to mention:
Percy has no interest in going to New Rome or university. First page of cotg he's asking Poseidon to excuse him from school forever. He hasn't looked up any programs or fields he wants to go into. He doesn't have any idea of what career or field he wants to work in. His sole reason for going: Annabeth. That's unhealthy. It's not good to base all your happiness on one person; it's too much pressure on both of you. Plus, codependency is not romantic. It's unhealthy.
Not to mention the strongest point of all, and imo the only one that really matters:
Perc@beth is being treated as the gold standard for relationships, and that's teaching tens/hundreds of thousands of impressionable young teens that this behavior is not only acceptable but something to be aspired. They don't understand that it's unhealthy or abusive. They'll aim to be like this and 1. may start treating their partner like this or 2. May allow their partner to treat them like this. This toxic behavior has real world consequences. It's not just a book. It's influencing people irl.
#anti percabeth#percy jackson#pjo#hoo#annabeth chase#heroes of olympus#percy jackson and the olympians#rick riordan#rrverse#nico di angelo#gabe ugliano#sally jackson#tyson#poseidon#abusive relationship#judo flip#trauma#pjo hoo#pjo hoo toa#percy#annabeth#anti percy/annabeth#anti percy jackson/annabeth chase#poll
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Comments on Netflix's Avatar The Last Airbender
*spoiler alert*
First of all I'm gonna start by saying it is one of the best adaptations I've seen so far. And that's the key word, adaptation. I've seen a lot of fans and others complain about some things that honestly, doesn't make sense because some things only work in a cartoon(just as much as some things only work in a book or a video game)
And before I start to talk about some topics that I judge important, I also wanna say that the production is fantastic, from the costumes to the CGI. It all looks amazing. (A part from Yue's wig)
1. The Script
It's not easy to pick 20+ episodes and make it fit in only 8 but damn they did a hell of a good job, especially when judging what was important to show and what they could let it go. Some fans commented that since there's no fillers, the Gaang and others miss some development but I think that for the universe of the live action what we got here it worked.
I can express how much I like to see Ozai and Azula's relationship and how it is now clear that he uses the siblings against each other, manipulating them to get what he wants. But I will admit I miss the fear Azula had, since it's implied in the show and some extras that she does fear Ozai, and fears becoming like Zuko.
I hope the 41. Is just fine after the battle in the north. See all of them bowing to Zuko after discovering that Zuko was the one that saved their asses and was heavily punished by that...it was beautiful. I loved the writers did that, give names and faces to Zuko's crew and a beautiful yet sad arc when Ozai banished his son and the men who he saved.
I also loved that they put weight into things that was treated as a joke, like Katara talking about her mother. She was a little kid who saw her mom get murdered in front of her and the live action made sure to let us know that it is not okay to make jokes about something so traumatic. All of the deaths here have tons of weight in it, it's not some random person, is someone we met, someone we liked, someone who helped. The costs of the war, something the cartoon manages to show us but know in live action, with real people, the massage gets stronger.
And they didn't forget Iroh's past like the fandom does, which is great. That actor, the earthbending soldier really let it all out, that's how you use the few screentime you have.
Sokka's isn't sexist and y'all were making a storm outta a cup of water, is not like Sokka sexist didn't go away after like the 4 or 5 episode in the original show. I think the live action was able to bring more depth to him in comparison to the first season of the cartoon. We see how he feels about his father's, the absence of him and his duty as warrior who kinda doesn't want to be a warrior.
I need a Gyatso in my life, I didn't know I needed to see more of him until the live action gave us more of him. Kyoshi was the Thor coming to Wakanda from this season, WHY THE FUCK BRYKE DONT WANNA GIVE US A KYOSHI SERIES? She is absolutely a jewel of a character. Roku and Kuruk, damn poor Kuruk man, so much pain in his words but again that's what it means to be the Avatar, it's not fun and games. Zhao saying to Aang what Korra villains said to Korra😭 that the world doesn't need the Avatar anymore, it hurt.
Guys I'm gonna say it, there's no way in hell for anyone to ship Kataang here. I'm saying this because some shippers complain that the secret tunnel part was different but c'mon, look at Kiawentiio and look at Gordon, it would be so s awkward and weird and just wrong. I know they don't have a big age difference, is only like 3 years but when they filmed Gordon looked so much younger than her, maybe in the next seasons the difference won't be that big.
The pace is good, once you start you don't wanna stop.
2. The Acting
Everyone is really good at capturing the essence of it's characters and somewhat making them their own. The highlights for me were Dallas and Ian, Its like they came straight from the show. Ken Leung's Zhao was also amazing as he was way more threatening here than he was in the show.
Kiawentiio was the Katara we were looking for, she is kind yet strong, brave and caring. And Gordon was Aang, sure, he has to learn a few things since he slipped a few times in his acting but nothing that could ruin the experience, that kid is good and just needs some experience.
Elizabeth Yu was Azula. It was different but yet the same character, is like learning something new of her and I like how cleared she show emotions with her eyes. Maria Zhang had great chemistry with Ian and I can't wait to see more of Suki. Arden Cho and Yvonne Chapman as June and Avatar Kyoshi look like they came out straight from the cartoon. Daniel Dae Kim...man is Ozai, so cold, so sharp, so scary, already way better than the cartoon version. I wanna see more of Paul Sun-Hyung Lee as Iroh since the character he really starts to shine in book 2.
3. The live action doesn't have the spirit of the OG?
Yes, it does have. The thing is now that we are seeing real people, things get dark one way or another but I don't think it ruined the spirit of the show. Aang is still a kid, Sokka still making sarcastic jokes, Zuko still annoying as hell, Katara still hopeful and strong... There's everything there really.
The thing is stuff like genocide, murder, war, death and suffering are, for some people, better to watch as pixels in a cartoon than real people.
I think it's a great adaptation and I would recommend it to every fan.
#avatar#Netflix#netflix avatar the last airbender#avatar the last airbender#the last airbender#avatar aang#avatar kyoshi#avatar roku#avatar kuruk#sokka#katara#azula#uncle iroh#zuko#zhao#atla#tla#comments on#korra#avatar korra
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Yada yada, kudou looked through Izuku’s memories and saw big gay thoughts, but we already knew they were gay. Of course they were gay. They’ve always been gay.
YOU KNOW WHAT I WANNA TALK ABOUT? THIS OFA QUIRKLESS THING!
It’s so FASCINATING! And I know I’m late to the party (school, work, life, depression, art block, the list could go on) but all I can think about is the trust that this entire situation holds.
On one hand, Izuku has to trust Kudou and his abilities. Defeating him from the inside out is probably the only way Izuku will win at this point.
And on the other hand, Izuku in his own way, is having to trust shigaraki, something he hasn’t done nor even considered before. He sees that little boy inside of him, but there’s more to that little boy. The man that stands before him, broken and beaten and shattered emotionally by society, is a person too. It truly doesn’t matter that the boy exists; yes it’s a way for Izuku to understand that concept of “heroes and villains are cut from the same cloth”, but it’s also the understanding that even when someone has fucked up their life, still deserves to be treated as a person for doing so. Everyone, EVERYONE, deserves the right to be and feel like a real and alive human being.
To me, it’s in the same vain as Izuku as a little boy. We could go over he details ALL DAY as to how he became the person he is, what could’ve been different, what could’ve happened. But at the end of the day, the only thing that changes the past is how we view it; Katsuki knows this.
There’s a part of me that whenever I see a fanfic where Katsuki meets his old middle school self that he hates him, wants to kick him down, humble him, whatever other verb here:
But that small part of me always thinks that it’s… oddly out of character.
Okay, comparing Katsuki and Izuku, who is more ashamed of their pasts?
If you guessed Izuku (and you agree with me), tell me what exactly inclines you to think that?
Because the difference between them is who accepts themself, and who doesn’t.
Accepting yourself doesn’t just mean, accepting that you were a bad person but you’re better now so it’s okay. No, I think that’s actually more complex than implied.
In my opinion, seeing your past actions as something to forgive is important too. Katsuki meeting his middle school self may seem like an aggressive cat fight in idea, but it practice may turn into high school Katsuki being unaffected by middle school him. He knows why he thought what he did, understands that it was bad, but also understands why that mindset came to be. He can be sorry to Izuku AND sorry to himself.
Izuku I think feels a sense of shame for his middle school self, especially that weakness. He cried more in middle school too; he didn’t try. That’s what he’s most mad about and unable to forgive himself for, he didn’t try.
And to an extent, Izuku has to learn that his perception of his past is what matters most: Shigaraki is the same.
Shigaraki as a little boy could’ve lived better circumstances. He could’ve found a hero and been saved. He could’ve had this or that or made a better decision. And I think a small part of him feels guilty for it. Shigaraki also doesn’t accept his past.
Ofa being taken away, as saddening as it may seem to fans, was always an ending I was hoping for. Of course I could be wrong and by the end of the manga he still has it, and while I’d still be happy with that ending… I just really want Izuku to let himself be a human being. A flawed one, with things he could or could not change, and accepting that fact.
After all, “You’re still human.” Right?
And sorry to bring up the girls again, but part of the key components to saving Himiko were trusting her, and not clinging to a small part of her. She wanted to see and know Himiko as she is, not who she was.
That’s this dudes problem; even if he wants to tear that rug to pieces, there’s certain ideas that hold him back. Think, the idea that your emotions matter less over others, or hating yourself for flaws that nearly every human being has.
Izuku saving Shigaraki has always always always been about saving himself too, and I love that.
Izuku had to trust Katsuki in this battle, trust allmight, trust Ochako, trust people. He had to let them take the wheel, the burden. Maybe he and Shigaraki can lift that burden for themselves too. His mask is broken, he’s become a monster blackwhip thing…
What’s your move Izuku?
#bkdk#midoriya izuku#mha deku#bkdk brainrot#bakudeku#bnha deku#bakugou katsuki#mha analysis#mha spoilers#mha 413#that’s the chapter right?#idfk#I got more thoughts pls hold on while I make myself write to death finally🙏🙏
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The way people are focusing on "My fav Gojo is not racist, he's just ignorant" and "Gege really hates Gojo he made him racist" when it was not even the point of that interaction. The point was to educate and talk about some stereotypes about black people that are harmful to the community and, if you look into it I'm sure you'll find has it origins in slavery.
Besides, Gojo is privileged and comes from an old money family, and it looks like he isolatehimself from others. Of course, it's in character for him to say stupid things like that. Even if he strives for change.
Yeah, everyone is so pressed that their fave is being problematic (which honestly Gojo has always been, he's hardly a saint and he treats many people quite shitty like for example Utahime and Ijichi) that they miss the bigger picture of this. Given, I think there are better ways to get that point across, but the aim here was definitely not "look at what a uniquely bad person Gojo is, I want to make readers hate him" it's for readers to reflect upon themselves and their own biases, conscious or not. Gojo is often being a dick to people, Miguel included, but this wasn't it. He wasn't just being annoying as usual, he made a misinformed statement rooted in racism "black people are naturally stronger/tougher/more resistant" and he got told off for it, which actually led to him apologizing. He expresses bigoted views, that are quite common all around the world and can lead to real harm like for example medical discrimination, but people often don't question or even notice that they have these views. I think exactly because he's such a fan-favourite character, Miguel calling him out and Gojo admitting he said fucked up shit is important.
Gojo might make a trip to Kenya to meet Yuuta, but unsurprisingly doesn't have any real black acquaintances and the one black person he knows a little better doesn't like him because he treats him like shit, an expandable tool (given, Miguel did try to help someone do a genocide so it's not like him working to make up for that in principle is a problem, but Gojo is not just treating him badly because of that) and has dismissed him and his culture as a whole. Gojo's racism towards Miguel didn't come out of thin air with chapter 255.
No wonder Miguel wants him dead.
You could say Gojo's racism and ignorance got punished before as this powerful cursed tool he so casually dismisses here together with its history could have gotten him out of the box much earlier. If he hadn't gone out of his way to destroy part of Kenyian sorcerer's culture because of his fear that it might be used to hurt him, he might still be alive. This chapter the payback was just more direct, Miguel was given the space to push back and not just get beat up (making in the previous moment Gojo seem like the righteous cool guy, seen by how the fandom reacted to their fight) and he also didn't sugar-coat it and straight up said "you're being racist".
The fact that Gojo apologized, something quite rare for him, and didn't defend his uninformed views or mocked Miguel for questioning him also shows that a lot of this comes from unaddressed biases, irrational fears and having lived a sheltered life in terms of being exposed to other cultures (and actually valuing them) that influence his judgement. He's not trying to be maliciously racist, but he clearly doesn't know what he's talking about and why it is harmful. I don't think he revelled in destroying other people's culture, he was just driven by a base fear, but that doesn't make the harm he caused any better. He's never had any reason to engage with black people on a personal level and that has unsurprisingly led to some ignorant opinions about them. Again, a very common sentiment which Gege uses Gojo to highlight. This is clearly reflecting arguments and talking points Gege has heard themselves and tried to address here. I'm sure there are all kinds of wild racist takes about Miguel on Japanese social media, I know the English side has them plenty.
I think the message Gege wanted to send was executed a bit clunkily by for example still tying Miguel's CT to rhythm (replacing the inhumanly strong black guy stereotype with another common one) and putting the burden all on Miguel to educate the people around him. Similarly, having only one (explicit) black person in the manga who has to then explain anti-black racism to the reader makes it feel very forced. I think you could've avoided a lot of that and included these topics more dynamically by giving us more background on Miguel's technique and how he came to it and comparing it to cursed technique's of other Kenyan or African sorcerer's. Another option would be making Hakari for example Black-Asian (or Todo or Yaga). He has a darker skin tone than the other characters and differently textured hair (which would already lead to him having to face a bunch of bigotry in his everyday life) and he is hated by the conservative higher-ups. So actually do something with that and address it.
Even Japanese people who are merely slightly tanned get harassed. Just being from Kyushu or Okinawa, somewhere where it's much warmer and sunnier and therefore not being as pale as the average person in e.g. Tokyo will get you plenty of derogatory comments, especially if you're a woman. That goes extra for indigenous people like the Ryukyuan or Ainu who not only face prejudice because of their appearance but also legal discrimination because of their origins and challenge the very popular notion that Japan only has one ethnic group and one language. Japan still struggles with a lot of racism internally against their own people, so you can imagine that it's even worse for anyone who newly immigrated or with parents who immigrated (in the best of times you will always be treated as a foreigner no matter how well you speak the language or integrate into the culture simply because you look "different"). It has gotten better in recent times, but it's still a problem, as Gege pointed out in this chapter.
Coming back to Hakari, we would also be able to see through him how jujutsu society treats black-identified Japanese sorcerers, which would be a different perspective from Miguel's who only visits Japan occasionally and mostly operated outside the system until Gojo came along. Black people aren't just something distant overseas, they are also Japanese citizens. You could show if and how jujutsu society differs from regular Japanese society. Most likely they are even more behind as they also discriminate against what kind of cursed technique you have (modern or one based on a long bloodline, which would automatically work against anyone not born in Japan and with a long family history there). You could also combine it with the transphobia Kirara faced and generally show how this system fails young sorcerers who don't conform to their norm.
But yeah, sorry Gojo is not perfect and will fall into the same stereotypical and bigoted thinking as many other people who rarely step outside their narrow homogenous social circle. Like you said, he's privileged with old money and family history who pride themselves on their bloodline. He's generally very narrow-minded about things that don't interest him or he sees as irrelevant like how he doesn't bother to understand Maki or has no problem ignoring a starving child on the road (who cares what happens to Hana, she's weak and Megumi is the strong one, he's who matters here and deserves to be lifted out of poverty) and international sorcerers fall under that as well. There are so little of them so it's okay to ignore them, why should he bother reaching out or informing himself about people abroad, he's never gonna interact with them anyway. If they get too dangerous for his taste, he's just gonna slap them around a bit and take away their sharp toys.
Honestly, I think what Gojo did previously is worse than what he said this chapter. He can learn to check his internalized racism and be more mindful of how he talks to Miguel or black people in general (he shows openness to criticism and improvement here), but he can't bring back Black Rope. It falls to Kenya's sorcerers to recreate it, which will take decades. They'll feel the impact of Gojo's actions long past his death, even when he can't say anything ignorant or racist anymore.
So I don't think this ruins his character, was done by Gege to make Gojo fans feel bad, or meant to keep anyone from liking him. He has character flaws and that is fine. He gets challenged on them and receives push back for them plenty in the story. I can understand that some fans feel bad reading the chapter, hearing Gojo regurgitate talking points they might've heard said against them as well, but it's not really Gege's fault for addressing this very common issue.
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a message to antis who're hating on shu for the dating rumours?
(go all out, be a bitch, get mad, speak for the real fandom <3)
OH OH OH I HAVE ONE
fuck off.
you're not entitled to know everything about his life, and you are certainly not entitled to belittle and scold him for how he's living said life.
you're all acting like he owes you something. like you think that, just because you're his fan, he is obligated to make himself stay single just so you can live out your fantasies?
it's pathetic, really.
and it's particularly pathetic that you're now taking to harassing him online and getting angry for no fucking reason just because he might be dating someone that's not you.
joshua is a real person, and you're treating him like he's just a plaything, something from your imagination that you can bully and manipulate into doing what you want just because you cry and whine and yell at him for it.
it's like you don't really care for him at all, isn't it? you all talk about how he's your favourite person, your comfort, but when you get even the slightest inkling that he's trying to find comfort in another person, you're screaming in his comments and defaming him and treating him like he's- like he's fucking killed your family or something.
if you even cared about him, just a little bit, caring about him as a person, you'd be glad for him that he's pursuing his own happiness, really. don't you think?
you're all really immature, you know that? immature and spoiled. joshua isn't yours. he isn't anyone's. let the man fucking live his own life, will you? let him date who he wants and leave him the hell alone.
#fairyhaos.answers#ask#friends <3#sky.friends <3#weird-bookworm#maybe i overdid it a little but#actually no i didnt#it's for fucking joshua hong okay?? one of fhe sweetest people in the world and im still in shock#that peopke have the fucking audacity to be so shitty towards him#after all he's done for you? after all you claim you'd do for him?#im just... incredibly angry and disappointed all at the samw time.#joshua.svt#bc this is important and it's for my boy shu#joshua#seventeen#svt#svt joshua
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After thinking more deeply about it, people shouldn’t get mad when seeing the majority shipping AyaYui because they are the most perfect for each other…not always in the good way.
They are both obsessive weirdos that are unable to communicate properly and end up doing so much dumb shit that not only hurts them but also the ones around them.
Now I’m not saying they are the most problematic characters in the game, but they just are such menaces for whoever is connected to them.
They be wondering why Yui wouldn’t make such a good couple with Subaru and Azusa but the reason is that they’re exactly too soft for her. They just want a kind and motherly girl but Yui keeps putting them in uncomfortable situations, doesn’t respect their boundaries and is unable to comprehend their introversion. Ik she was in a dangerous situation at first but that’s over after the second game, isn’t it? They started dating so if that’s what she truly wanted, she has to take responsibility for that and bring her brain to work.
Now about Mr. Yours Truly, he wasn’t irredeemably bad in the first game but he was such an asshole, let’s be frank. After the first game, Yui started treating him poorly or, again , not paying attention to whatever he was going through but I just couldn’t feel bad for him. They both fucked eachother up so bad but in an equal way so I can’t say any of them is better than the other, like some of their individual fans do. I’m not saying this about the Admin but some Yui and Ayato stans must actually hate the characters and only love their fanon version of them. Just because they forgive their abusers and are friendly doesn’t make them the kindest character anyone has ever seen. They did too many bad things to be considered the kindest and I’m not gonna follow the “they went insane” excuse because I really don’t care. All characters are insane and broken but not all of them did as much shit as they did.
I’m not justifying anything from that dick but e.g. when Karlheinz commits a genocide to make ghouls, he is said to have abused his powers and is evil but when Yui commits a genocide because her cute Ayato-kun 〜 died and kills all living things on both worlds, that’s seen as romantic? Like that’s extremely evil and selfish of her too.
Or when others complain about the vampires being possessive and jealous, when Yui is the same person that stabbed Shu and threw him in the dungeon afterwards out of jealousy and she also paralysed Ayato then used him as her pleasure slave only because he drank blood from other chicks. Again, I’m not excusing them but she’s just as worse when triggered enough.
All the fanwars are stupid when the game only has characters that wouldn’t be perceived as mentally sane or innocent angels in real life.
// Uuh… you kinda worded it a bit too harshly but I do get where you come from.
The thing is Yui, Ayato, Azusa, Subaru and Yuma are characters described by Rejet as either pure or kind-hearted, yet this doesn’t mean they necessarily have to be saints sent from above 24/7. Good people can react horribly under stress, pressure or shock. Yes, they can do wrong stuff and treat others badly as a result, but this doesn’t mean they have a bad soul. Trauma is not the same from person to person and everyone reacts to it differently. It can turn good people into monsters depending on the severity of the circumstances and some might never come back to their original nature. And, even if they do, this will not excuse their actions, but as long as they try to change for the better and take accountability, I believe they deserve a second chance.
Rejet makes Yui go mad in some endings and After stories to demonstrate that she is capable of doing something as awful as the Diaboys if an event hits her hard enough, just like it did to them. And, to be honest, that's realistic. Of course, not the story, but the fact that every person, no matter how strong, has a breaking point.
Speaking of the genocide committed by Yui, the reason why it’s considered romantic is not the deed itself, but the fact Yui created an Ayato ghoul after exterminating everything, only because she wanted to be killed by the man she loved. I think this was the only time Yui seriously used her brain, and the fact she was crazy when doing that, makes it hilarious.
As for the Yandere endings, Yui does that to Shu in MB, if I recall correctly but it was so unexpected because she really didn’t get any vibes throughout the route, therefore I guess it was just random writing. In Ayato’s route, the obsessive tendencies were obvious when she started looking through Ayato’s swimsuit magazines and tried measuring her boobs to the ones of those girls. I was pretty sure she would pull a possessive move on him later on, lol.
Truth be told, I don't mind that in fictional couples as long as they're both obsessed with each other and it's not one-sided. Besides, it’s funny how even Ruki called Yui “Ayato obsessed” in CL.
As a DL fan, I understand that no character is a total green flag because they all display toxic behavior in regular circumstances, no matter if intentional or not. Nonetheless, that shouldn’t stop us from loving them. Some people prefer the softer aspects of DL, while others prefer the darker, but keep in mind that those who prefer talking well about their favs don't want to be always reminded of all the bad things they did, especially if those characters regret them or weren't in the best mental state at the time.
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Making this post moreso for mutuals so they don't tag me in Batfam x Atsv posts that have Jason with Hobie as eachother's counterparts and then feel bad when i say i hate that concept but i really need to get it off my chest that i find it REALLY annoying and basic when superhero fans assume they'd be the duo.Yeah,obviously they'd be close friends,but sorry not sorry,if y'all bothered to read Jason's comics or pay any mind to Hobie as a whole instead of just the 'he's a punk dude' bits,you'd know that A)Hobie would think Jason's an absolute cringelord,not look up to him or immediately respect him and Jason'd have to proof himself to him and that B)Jason's Spiderfam bestie wouldn't be anyone other than Miles and same goes for Miles' Batfam bestie not being anyone other than Jason LMFAO.He's literally him when he was Robin so that'd be enough of a reason to instantly like him but on Miles' end Jason's basically Itsv!Peter B Parker with Aaron Davis' alignment so same logic but there's also how Jason's canonically a classical literature nerd and gamer,Miles' an artist and anime fan,they have the same taste in fast/junk food and flirting tactics and their lives both went to shit because the universe said so when they were 15.Also,Talia Al-Ghul and Rio Morales have the same vibe and you can quote me on that and i think if the comics had given Jason a 56 Gwen-adjacent love interest who was afrolatina then a lot of the problems in his writing would be fixed
Speaking of which-Have you guys not noticed how Miles is so good at making people better without even really trying and thus not at the cost of his own arcs or real personality and is instead just an aspect of him?Or how he's been shown as enjoying hanging out with older people,with even Gwen having a year on him?Or how Miles G literally has the Red Hood Era storyline(Sunshine softboy as a kid but turned into a goth asshole to cope with trauma and additional an anti-villain/vigilante/morally gray)?To throw some shade i know for a fact he makes a more fitting best friend and younger sibling for Jason than Roy Harper,Marinette Dupain-Cheng AND Danny Fenton do,the first for reasons i've said already,the last two because he'd never fuck with Bruce Wayne in his life and just knows him as that fakeout furry rich guy his older brother figure roasts sometimes and cons money out of to buy him gifts
And Jason would have someone he can geek out with and relate to for once and have legit reasons to want to turn good again because Miles made him see the good in the world again and at the same time Miles got taught to stop feeling for failing at things he tried his best at and that he can always just try again in different ways but always his own thing and Miles makes Jason feel like a kid again and Jason treats Miles like he's still a kid since HE IS and-Man,you see what i mean?They'd have the most interesting dynamic ever and frankly i think we all deserve to see it instead of 'He was a punk,he was also a punk,can i make it anymore obvious?'BLEHGH!!!!
Also,just cause i want to be able to tag this as Punkflower:
Hobie:Your guy's really hot
Jason:WHAT?!Bruh,Miles' like my brother!
Hobie:Your brother's really hot.And now i got a scooby doo on how there's no blood relation
#they....#flowerghost#punkhood#punkflower#t4t punkflower#jason todd#miles morales#gwen stacy#ghostflower#summer kent#jaysumm#afrolatino jason supremacy#black gwen stacy#latino superfam tag#trans superfam tag#batfam#ditf#lost days#utrh#itsv#atsv#btsv#spidey and his amazing friends#spiderman#the anomalies#autistic jason todd#autistic miles#autistic gwen stacy#autistic hobie brown#summerposting
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