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Royalty Part 2

Pairing: Prince Felix x female reader, switched POVs, set after 2 years.

Warnings: smut duh with a plot ofc, unprotected sex(wrap before you tap), nicknames, cursing, death? Mental health issues, heartbreak lol, violence ig.

A/n: heheh ik you’ve waited for this so enjoy! Ps Daniel deserves sm better😭

W.C: 7000 words

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“Felix?” My attention was brought back by Chan, he snapped his fingers which made me jump. “Are you okay?” Am I okay? I’ve been asking myself that for a long time.

I nodded my head and gave a reassurance smile, which was completely fake. He was talking to me about some duties I needed to attend to. I had to step up, as the widowed-crown prince, who was a better fit than a 7-year-old. I had to get over everything so fast, my bride who died on our wedding day, I was forced to forget about it. But I couldn’t, I simply could not. Because I would only love her and only her. “Are you even paying attention?” I dropped my hand against the desk which was holding up my head. “We need to find you another bride.” I became outraged, “what are you talking about?” He sighs and sits in front of me, “it’s been two years. We need a crown princess.” I stood up from my chair, “how could you ask something like this?”

“You are the most wanted husband in the land, you have ladies lining up for you.” This brings me back to before, when I was invited to the imperial palace for the first time, and saw her. “I don’t want another lady.” He groaned in annoyance which caused me to turn angrily, he spoke before thinking, “why can’t you just forget her?” I charged towards him, lifting my fist to him and gripping his shirt, but I caught myself. I let him go and sighed, “why do you think? She was murdered on our wedding day, I couldn’t save her. To this day I don’t know who murdered her.”

Her father refused to investigate her death, her assassin. He believed it wouldn’t let her soul rest, which he ordered no one to look into it or they would be killed. I looked at the jade ring on my finger, our wedding rings, I buried the other one with her. “I just want her back.” We were interrupted by a guard stepping inside, “his majesty would like a word alone.” I motioned for Chan to leave and the King stepped inside. “Your majesty,” I bowed and he bowed back, “Felix.” I sat down, but he insisted on not sitting with me. “It’s time we find you a bride.” I slumped defeated, unbelievable. The king had recently remarried after y/ns mother couldn’t handle the pain of her death. She killed herself. He chose to remarry only a month ago.

“It’s just hard, after everything.” He reached for my hand but I reluctantly moved. “I understand, but I did it. Which means you can too.” I held my breath as he was turning to leave, “just think about it.” Then he slithered away. I sat there for a while, thinking about everything that happened. I decided it was time I should go take a bath. I walked into my room and told my servants I wanted a bath. They left to prepare and would alert me when it was ready. Chan came running inside. “You won’t believe what I just heard.” I crossed my arms and stared, awaiting the information.

“I overheard a conversation the king had with his new bride.” He gets up and walks over to the station full of sweets and drinks. “She had a twin sister. She lived in the village, poor as mice. She was taken care of by undercover palace guards.” I frown my forehead and lean against the table in my room. It was y/ns, her room. I watched him pour a cup of tea for me, he set it down on the table in front of me, “I don’t drink tea.. Have you investigated this?” He sighs heavily, “there’s no record of her. Anywhere.” I stepped back, stunned, “how could there be no information on her?” He shrugged his shoulders, and sat down on the chair. “Maybe he didn’t want anyone to find out about her.” But why?

“I want you to investigate y/n’s past.” He raises an eyebrow, “I will be killed.” I shut my eyes and looked at him with annoyance, “not her death. Her birth. There must be a reason why her sister was sent away.” He nodded his head and bowed then disappeared. I was called away.

~~~

“It’s crazy.” I sat in disbelief on my bed, our bed. Chan ran into the room with grief news. “But it’s true. She was born from a different mother and that’s where the sister is.” I shook my head and my hands wiped my face, Chan’s eyebrows carefully moved to his emotions “but then why would the queen kill herself after?” He smacked his lips, “she raised y/n as her own. She couldn’t have children, or so she thought until she gave birth to Daniel. But the king bedded another woman secretly to have an heir.” I laid back into my bed and looked at the ceiling. “He sent away her sister to the mother to keep the affair quiet,” I concluded. Chan patted my chest and laid down with me. It was silent for a few moments until I sat up suddenly. “We have to find her.”

He looked at me like I was crazy. “There’s no way we could pull that off.” I licked my lips and chewed on the inside of my cheek. There is a way. “The king wants me to find a bride, I could say I’m searching for one.” But of course where would I even take her? I can’t take her here. It would have to be back at my home, my mansion. “Send word to my mother that I will be returning for a few days.” Chan exclaimed softly as his bright smile beamed and he patted my back, “we’re finally going home.”

~~~

“Welcome back, Felix.” My mother held out her arms to me which I felt obligated to fall into. She rubbed my back softly and hummed, “it’s so good to see you.” I broke away and she cupped my cheeks, “how are you, lix?” I sighed and hung my head low, “I wish I could say better.” She paused and tried to lead me inside. “I have to do an errand before I enter, would you mind having the servants prepare my room?” It was an excuse not to talk about things, because I knew she would ask. She smiled and sent me off with a wave. I walked the streets alone, without Chan. I always loved walking down the market, watching couples and families enjoy themselves. I always wanted to do this with y/n.

I get a harsh shove into my right shoulder, a man apologizes without looking back. I rubbed my shoulder when I noticed a fabric dragging on the ground, from a woman covering her face. My fingertips brushed against it as it passed by me. It’s royal silk, a beautiful pink. How would a commoner have this? I watched the figure walk away silently, ducking her head down so as not to be noticed. I get curious and begin to follow behind her.

I easily got stopped and bumped into the crowd. I see her turn into a side street. Which I walked into at a distance. I’m standing in the middle, where she’s nowhere to be found. I turn to leave, and there she is. Standing in front of me with a dagger up to my face. “Y/n?” Her eyes squint and she looks me up and down, scanning me. “Who are you and why are you following me?”

~~~

He doesn’t speak for a few moments. He’s speechless as his mouth is gaping a little open. “Well?” I stick the dagger closer to his neck. He clears his throat, “you look like someone I knew.” I scoffed and tilted my head, “y/n?” His eyes widen, I hear a shuffle behind me but I keep my eyes on him. He moves swiftly and fast, he grabs the dagger from his throat and swings it behind me. A man groans from behind me and he pulls me behind him. “We have to get out of here,” I cling onto his shoulder, “now.” I have no time to react as we start running in the opposite direction. He leads back into the crowd of the market.

He grabs my headpiece and wraps it around his shirt. “It’ll be better if we hide in plain sight.” I frown as I stare at him. “More like exposing myself,” my face is completely open and more of a target now. He unwraps his own waist piece and pulls it over my head, it’s soft but not silky. “The pink gives you away, royal silk is obvious.” I pause and stop in my tracks. “How’d you know it was royal silk?” He brings up my wrist as my jade bracelet dangles down my arm. “Just like this bracelet which is only for royals.” He drags me alongside him as the crowd starts to settle down. “I’ll walk you home, lead the way.”

“How do you know I have royal clothing?” He sighs as he pulls us out of the main streets. “I’m a royal too. Crown Prince Felix.” I remain blank. “Which is why I know the design of this.” He points to my jade bracelet, the engraving of it. “My wife, she had the same so I should be asking you. How do you have this?” I don’t say anything as I take a step back. “Hello, Yuna. Nice to meet my sister-in-law.”

~~~

She sighs heavily and crosses her arms in disgust. “So you know who I am.” I analyze her clothing more closely. The beading on her dress was made with no flaws but now hanging off from the misuse. Her pinks and beiges collide perfectly with each other but blue strapped to her head make her look common. I lean against the wall on my shoulder, “it was obvious, you’re twins.” She rolls her eyes and looks away, I guide her chin to turn towards me gently. “You’re almost the same person,” I scan her face for any scars or moles that could depict that she’s different from y/n. But nothing. Her eyes engrave into mine, her lips the same shade of pink, eyes the same shape as hers. But she’s not her.

She snaps her chin out of my reach. “But we’re not,” she picks up her dress and begins to walk past me. I follow her as she leads the way. A man pops out in front of me and yells, “boo!” Chan pulls off his hood. Yuna jumps back a bit. “God, what’s wrong with you?” He laughs uproariously and I groan and shake my head in my hands. I hear her giggle a bit and he turns his attention to her. “Whoa, you found her?” Yuna raises an eyebrow and looks at me for confirmation, “you were looking for me?” I sigh heavily and nod, “wasn’t it obvious? I knew who you were.” She blanks her face out and walks away, while Chan and I exchange a look and follow.

A pair of children are playing in front of us and are throwing a ball. I see her body release from tension as she watches them as we approach. “I know my sister died,” it’s silent between us. She stops in her tracks and slowly spins to me. “But why does that have anything to do with me?” I bite the inside of my cheek, “it doesn’t. But I just wanted to know if it was true, that she had a twin sister.” She flexes her fists into a ball, “I heard you’re looking for a bride,” there’s anger in her voice. I walk past her with Chan by my side and she closely keeps up. After a couple moments, I mention, “I have no intention of marrying another woman, no one will ever replace her.”

I hear her footsteps stop in place. “Everyone's replaceable,” Chan and I turn, standing frozen, staring at her. Something about her eyes is so familiar, like I've looked into them before. Like they’re sad, on the verge of tears, like y/ns. It must be a twin thing. “I mean you shouldn’t live your life in the past, she wouldn’t want you to be alone forever.” The ball accidentally launches our way and the children run to us. They bump into her and I stop them. “Return the bracelet,” the children look at each other. She looks at me weirdly, “now.” The kids bow their heads and hand me the bracelet that they stole from Yuna. They immediately apologize and get on their knees. “It’s okay, stealing isn’t the answer.” I hand them a bag with coins from Chan, which they gladly accept.

They run off and I turn to Yuna, who is standing astonished. “You might want this back,” I walk to her silently, holding out her jade bracelet. She clings onto it tightly and pulls it onto her wrist. “You’ve helped me twice today,” my mind flashes back to y/n. Her voice in sync with my memory, “If you did have an intention of marrying, you would be a good husband.” The resemblance is too much. My eyes flash to her wrist, a mole in the exact spot. Her eyes drive into mine, she looks away, as if she realizes she said something she shouldn’t have. “It scares me how alike they are,” I whisper to Chan. She clears her throat harshly, “before I was interrupted… I was showing you to my place.” I nod my head as she sways past us, she takes a sharp turn which causes us to skip ahead.

“Don’t mind the mess,” she holds down a handle and the door creaks awfully open. She nods her head to enter, Chan begins to walk but she pushes him back by his chest. “Not you… him only.” Chan widens his eyes and scoffs at her, his head twists to me. I raise my head and shoo him away. “Just take a walk, get snacks or something.” He rolls his eyes and storms away. “I don’t really trust him,” she mumbled to herself as she walked inside. But it was clear to me. Why? What made her feel that way?

She led me to a room, one with a table on the floor and silk bedding. I presume it’s her room. The appearance of the outside is destroyed, but inside reveals a marvelous haven. There’s a shelf of books, books no ordinary girl would have. I reach out to grab one. “So my sister really did a number on you.” My hands freeze in motion and flutter to my side. “What do you mean by that?” She suddenly begins to cower, placing the pot on the table. “You’re the crown prince, by marriage right?” I sigh heavily and look at the seat in front of her. “I’m not really supposed to talk about it. It’s sort of illegal.”

I sit in front of her as she pours the liquid into a cup beside me. “What could I do? People don’t even know I exist.” She munches on the cookie next to her. “Technically I’m not the crown prince.” Her brows furrow as she sips on her drink, “you know of her death, correct?” She chokes on her drink. She pats her chest and gasps, she stutters, “yes I know she’s.. gone. But not how it happened.” I chew on the inside of my cheek, dreading to relive the moments and explain what happened.

“She died before I could marry her, the morning of to be exact. She was murdered and I wasn’t allowed to investigate.” Her eyes drop into sorrow, deep with understanding and remorse for me. “You came to look for me, was it because you wanted to know more about her?” I shook my head, “no. I just wanted to see if the rumors are true, some part of me wishes it was her. But you’re not your sister, and I won’t imply you are anymore.” It’s silent between us. She reaches for her drink and stares at me, “you’re not drinking your tea?” I had forgotten all about it. “No, I don’t drink tea anymore.” The painful reminder of y/n, how she tried to make the world go away by it. Yuna bites her bottom lip as if tempted to say a secret.

I decided to try to get more information about her. “Have you ever met her?” Her eyes dart up to mine, eyes wide and she licks her lips to bide time. To utter simple words, “no.” I narrowed my eyes, “You never wondered to meet her? Not a single drop of curiosity?” I simply don’t believe it when she shakes her head no. I sit back a bit and smile unconvincingly. I sigh heavily, “I wish I could be more to Daniel.” When I brought up his name, I saw a slight twinkle in her, a glimpse of pain. It was something no one would easily notice, but it’s my job to recognize things. “Your little brother in fact, he was so destroyed by everything. The queen mother died of a broken heart by the death of y/n. I couldn’t comfort him, I was grieving myself.” My eyes begin to water without me being able to control it.

Her hand reaches over the table and clings onto my arm. “I’m so sorry,” her thumb rubs against me softly. “I had no idea how much it affected everyone.” My hand rests on hers, “you didn’t know. It’s alright.” I blink back my tears and wipe my face. She suddenly gets up from in front of me and comes by my side. She crouches to my level. She grabs the cloth that I used to conceal her and brushes it across my tear streams. “I don’t want you to hurt, I want to take your pain away.” Her words hit me so deep, so close to my heart. I wish she were y/n, so I could hold her close and kiss her. To have her in my arms again and never let her go.

His eyes slowly travel and wander into mine. “You can’t, only she can.” He slowly takes the cloth from my hands and into his lap. “You said I was like her, let me help you.” I cup my hands around his face, “treat me like I was her. Pretend I am her and let me handle the pain.” He furrows his brows confused and shakes his head, “why? You’re doing this because you pity me?” I frown and try my best to explain, “no, because you saved me and I want to repay you.” I lean in and admire him, his sun-kissed freckles and hazel eyes. Looking so deep into mine. “Just let go,” I feel his breath against my lips and inch my way slowly. Our lips don’t connect as he puts them against my neck and he groans, he pulls me away by my arms and just stares. Completely shocked and completely entranced.

He doesn’t wait to connect his lips again. He sighs as if he’s finally letting himself relax. He’s groping at my clothes and leading me into his lap. So hungry for comfort and love. He claws at my buttons and tries his best to softly undo them. It’s taking too long and my body is beginning to feel on fire. I could care less if he’s imagining my sister instead of me, I just want him. I break away from him and undo them myself, I try to lead him back but he pulls away. “Should we be doing this?” He’s out a breath already and salvaging his strength. I stand up and drag the dress down my shoulders, achingly slow. “I want this.” He shakes his head and his hands pull my dress back up. “I can’t do this,” he looks faint and white. He can’t shake that he knows that he’s been the only one to touch me. So, he couldn’t leave me impure and unwed. Even if it’s a secret.

~~~

My head is spinning and I can’t look at her straight. Her face drops immediately and she turns away to readjust her dress. “I didn’t come here for this, I came to take you. And now that I’ve touched you, I have to take responsibility for you.” She seems to wipe her face, and breathes harshly. “Take me where?” I let silence overcome us until she realizes. And turns towards me angrily, “you want to take me to the palace? You’re out of your mind!” I try to reason with her and explain but she shushes me. Her hand rolls off her hair in disbelief, “explain to me why I should even bother to go. My own sister died in that place, she was murdered! And no one is allowed to investigate or even question what happened!” Her hands bang against the shelf, and she lays her head against it. “I will not go there just to be killed for existing. Just for my presence.”

I walk to her cautiously, my hand hovers over her skin. The skin I was touching so recklessly earlier. I lightly took her arm to face me, “you don’t have to go. But I want to make sure you’re taken care of, and since I’ve seen you in that way… I have to keep my duty and respect, and marry you.” She smiled lightly at the words. Her eyes stare at the contact, she shrugs her shoulders and looks up. “You have to ensure I won’t get hurt, that nothing will happen to me, if I say yes.” I nod my head and show her a sympathetic smile. “I want to take you to my home first.” Her eyebrow raises and her eyes crease, “to your home?”

~~~

We arrive with Chan leading us. Her head is concealed and so am I. We walk inside and Chan looks around to see if the halls are clear. He instructs us to go and I grab a hold of her hand, rushing her into my room. “Make sure no one comes inside,” I whisper to Chan and order him to stand outside of the door. I turn and watch her wander around my room. She lets her hood slip down, “this is where you live, hm? Didn’t take it that you were a pampered little lord before royalty.” I smile awkwardly as she walks around the room, her hips sway as her dress follows her movements. Y/n always was graceful, her motions would flutter my heart and she was truly beautiful. She had such a way with her movements, a performer.

I grabbed the box from the table beside my bed, containing the matching wedding ring to mine. She noticed me standing awkwardly and walked to me. I made no action or effort to explain as I slipped the ring on her fingers. “It’s beautiful,” she admired the crystals. Blue and white diamonds. It fit perfectly as it slid on like butter. Looking just as it was on y/n. I walked away to face a nightmare awaiting me.

“Felix?” I snapped to the balcony, where Daniel is standing with tears and distraught. He begins to sob and runs to Yuna. “You’re alive!” He jumps into her legs, screaming with joy but she pushes him away. Pushes him so harshly that he falls to the ground. He falls with a thump and looks up at her, “y/n?” The scene hurts my heartstrings, and I can’t move, can’t explain. He scans her from head to toe. “It’s me- Daniel. Don’t you remember?” Her head hangs low and she tries to help him up. He crawls away from her, shaking his head. My legs finally move and I get him up from the floor. “Why are you doing this?” His eyes begin to tear up again and his bottom lip trembles. “I don’t know you-“ her voice breaks as she backs away. Her hand clings to her chest as she breathes hard. “How could you say that? I’m your brother, your little brother!”

He stomps his foot down and reaches out his hand, holding a book. “You would read this to me, every night you would read to me.” Her bottom lip is trapped between her lips. “Don’t pretend you don’t know me-“ Tears begin to flow down his cheeks. But she stands just staring at him, nothing behind her eyes. He drops the book at her feet, “I wish you didn’t come back, I wish you stayed dead.” I stared at Daniel as he said those words, it seemed to shatter something inside Yuna. She falls backwards onto the bed and Daniel runs out of the room. Chan runs inside and I yell to run after him.

~~~

Yuna wouldn’t speak to me after that. She didn’t eat for the rest of the day and Chan drew her a bath to soothe her. But when he tried to encourage her, she sent him away. She just sat on my bed, staring into oblivion. “Yuna, I’m going to take you to the bath.” She didn’t look at me as I picked her up into my arms. I walked her to the bath and tried to tell her to get in. “Please,” I begged and she finally looked at me. I turned away as she undressed and went in. The bath was built into the floor and was filled with aromas and petals. I turned once she was inside and scrubbed her back. She wouldn’t move and I tried my best to help her.

I put her to bed but she dressed herself. I made sure she would. She turned away from me in the bed. “Yuna, tell me what’s wrong.” A tear slid down her cheek and she broke out into sobs. She cradled the blanket into her chest. I rubbed her shoulder which caused her sleeve to fall down. I noticed a burn on her lower neck which was not there before. Then I noticed she stopped moving. “Yuna?” I shook her but she didn’t move. I rolled her to face me and she wasn’t responding. I yelled out to Chan to get help. No, no. This can’t happen again. I carried her in my arms and ran out with no regard for who would see her. Servants followed behind me and I couldn’t shake off their faces, their fear. I ran to the doctor’s quarters and placed her on the bed.

I ordered him to help her and he immediately ran to work. “Poison,” he muttered and my skin wanted to scream. It burned and ached and my heart began to lose its beats. I forgot how to breathe and the walls began to close in. My vision began to get dark as I clutched her hand. “Felix,” the doctor tried to call my attention. I blocked him out of my mind and focused only on her. The marking on her neck worsened and then a shine hit my eye. I pulled her sleeve to reveal a needle sticking from the hem, dripping was her blood mixed with a green substance and I knew it was placed on purpose. Chan ran in behind me and yanked me out of the way. He led me out of the room and in the hall. “Where were you?!” I roared at Chan and he stood speechless. “Where were you when this happened?” He rubbed his face with the palm of his hand, that’s when I noticed it. A marking the same as Yuna’s.

My eyes narrowed at him and I faced the wall to hide my realization. “I don’t really trust him,” Yuna’s voice rings my head. It finally clicked for me, all of this. Y/n’s death, her assassination, the poisoned needle in Yuna’s clothes. Chan had just as much authority as me to enter and escape secretly. Just as much power to kill. But why? Why would he do this? I punched the wall and yelled. My father, it’s the only reason. He may be dead but his business will live on. He wanted to train me as an assassin. He wanted to gain control of me. What better way to do that by manipulating and controlling my closest advisor? Chan, what a traitor. You killed y/n. Didn’t you? And I won’t let you get away with it.

The doctor comes out and immediately brings me back to the situation. “We’re going to need an antidote immediately. She’ll die without it.” We don’t have the resources here to look for one or create one. I have to get her out of here. “Quickly get a carriage ready to the palace,” I ordered and everyone scrambled to hurry. I stayed by her side the whole way and she was struggling to breathe and clenched her hand against mine. I tried to calm her and tell her she’ll be okay. Her neck had begun to turn green and swell. I recognize this. Of course, it’s my father’s poison. I’ve never seen it but I’ve heard of its effects. As soon as we arrived, I recited the antidote to the royal doctor and he immediately injected the serum into her.

Her chest began to rise and fall normally. The swelling went down and the green disappeared. I sighed in relief and ordered everyone to leave the room. I sat alone next to her, holding her hand and crying. Her eyes opened with a flick and she mumbled a light, “Felix?” I gasped in delight and shushed her. I gripped her hand and kissed it. “You’re okay, thank god.” I whimpered with my head down. Shaking my head back and forth. “I don’t know what I would’ve done if you died.” My voice is breaking and sounding pathetic, but I could care less. “I wouldn’t leave you again.” My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Again? “I wouldn’t dare die on you again. I just got you back.” Got me back? “Sleep, get some rest.” That’s all I told her and tried to push away the mumbles.

She pulled me back in. “Don’t you see me, lix?” Her hand brushes on my cheek, pulls me and whispers, “it’s me, lixie.” My tears continue to flow down my cheeks while I stare at her. “You’re not in the right mind-” she cut me off. “I love you.” My heart drops and I shudder away from her touch. This is too much, all I can think of is y/n. “Stop.” I tremble onto my feet and she falls asleep. My head cannot handle this. I don’t know what to think and just leave. Is it true? Is all of it true?

~~~

I wake up with my head pounding and the room is dark. So very dark. My vision clears up and I realize I’m back in Felix’s room. I turn to see Felix in the corner. Huddled up in a ball on a seat. He notices I’m awake and sits up quickly. He clears his throat as I sit up too. “God, what happened?” He hands me a cup of water and I swallow it whole. “You were poisoned.” My mouth gapes open and my mind flashes to last night. “You were out for a couple days.” I begin to feel my blood rush to my head as I want to scream out. My palm rushes to my head to try to ease my headache. I’m trying to remember the lost time when he blurts out unbelievable words. “I won’t marry you.” My eyes dart towards his direction. “What are you talking about? You won’t marry me?”

He stands up angrily and crosses his arms. “I won’t marry you. I’m sending you back.” My eyes water and I try to blink them back. “But why? Is it because of the poisoning? Did I do something wrong?” He doesn’t face me now and his arms drop to his side. “No,” he says simply as if he doesn’t owe me an explanation. “Is it because of my sister?” He turns in fury to me. “You almost died!” My chest rises up and down heavily. I get up from the bed. “But I’m not! You can’t blame me and punish me for something that I had no control over!” His fists tightened, “and no one should blame me for not knowing who killed y/n!” I take a step back, “what?” I say in disbelief and almost breathless.

“I won’t let you die in vain, not like she did. I can’t let this happen.” I scoffed, “she didn’t die in vain. I know that because she wanted to be happy and she was. And you have to trust that the person who killed her will eventually be revealed.” His expression changes heavily, as if something had clicked in his mind. He takes small steps closer to me. “You claimed you didn’t know her, and as you said she wanted to be happy, as if you did meet her.” My expression goes blank. “I do know her killer will be revealed,” he sets his hands on my shoulders and leans into my ear, “because..” His words are a husky whisper in my ear. “You know who killed your sister. Because it was you at the beginning, y/n.”

~~~

I caught her, so perfect in a lie. She steps back while shaking her head, fear in her eyes. “You switched places with her.” Her hand clasped over her mouth, concealing a cry of realization. She is starting to hyperventilate, and she clings to her chest. “Please- let me explain.” I give her no chance, and approach her, “you let me think you died! Do you know the pain I went through?!” She sobs loudly now and closes her eyes. I shake my head and my hands clench into a fist. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Her words are broken and full of heartbreak. She tries to calm herself down and explain, but I turn away.

“I switched places with her because I wanted her to experience being a princess and to be truly loved at least once… I wasn’t expecting her to die that day.” I snapped my head, “She said she loved me, as she lay dying in my hands.” I was screaming internally. Why? Why would she play with me like that? “She chose not to break her cover… for me.” She got on her knees in front of me, “please believe me. I had to keep playing like her, I couldn’t live in that place anymore.” I begin to tremble as I drop down too, “you couldn’t be with me? Be happy with me?! I would’ve treasured you and cared for you!” She breaks down even more and reaches for me. I reject her touch, “if you would’ve given me the chance. I would’ve made you happy.”

“Please, Felix. I’m still me!” A stray tear falls down my cheek and I struggle to swallow. “Felix, look at me!” She latches onto me and forces my head to her. “It’s me! Your y/n, your wife!” She rubs my cheek as she tries to soothe me, but it doesn’t. My heart feels as if it’s breaking. “You broke my heart, broke everyone’s heart. Daniel is suffering as much as me. And you think I can just forget that?” I bite my lip and hesitantly pry off her hands from me. “I can’t,” I walked away from her and out the door. I stood outside the door, holding it close and listening to her cries and pleas. It’s for the best.

I knocked on the door the next morning with maids following behind me. Y/n… She was sitting on the bed waiting. “Pack up her stuff and get her ready to travel.” She gasps in disbelief and stands up. “Leave us!” She says with such intensity the maids jump back. I nod at them to leave and they do. “Asshole!” I furrow my brows in confusion. She throws a pillow at me. Then a blanket. Then her shoes. All while yelling incoherent insults. Then she pushes me onto the bed while slapping and kicking me. Getting all her anger out. “How dare you try to send me away! I’m your wife. I love you and I want to be with you! I will not let you reject me!” I start to laugh, a real laugh. She stops in her tracks with a pillow above her head. She begins to giggle and smile when she notices I find her amusing.

“You’re hilarious,” she frowns and crosses her arms. “I’m supposed to be intimidating.” I sigh and she backs down and sits next to me on the bed. “Are you really gonna send me away?” She blinks at me with such hope in her eyes. “Give me a reason why I shouldn't.” She raises her shoulders at me in disbelief, “did you not hear my whole speech right now?” I smile and sit up. “What do I get out of this?” She throws the pillow at my head and tackles me. “A loving wife who listens to you!” I laugh again and watch her. She rests herself in my lap and it makes me anxious. She notices and gets self conscious too. “Are you not okay with this?” I look to the side, avoiding her gaze. I know I can’t say no to her, and she knows it too.

“Look at me,” she pulls my chin to her. “It’s me, lixie. Just as before.” Her hair is messy from all her playfulness. Her clothing is a beautiful shade of pink and hanging off her shoulders, her beautiful skin. So soft and smells of roses. Her beauty is unmatched and looks even more in this setting. Just us together. “You want to know what you get out of this?” I make eye contact with her and already know what she’s going to do. She begins to untie her dress and lets it slip off. I close my eyes and shutter when I feel her clothing slip down my legs and onto the floor.

~~~

He can’t avoid this. You won’t let him. You place his hands on your breasts and he gasps. “My god-” He whispers to himself and he can’t resist as his eyes open. He practically devours you with his gaze. “This is what married people do,” you begin to rock your hips against his covered length. He bites his bottom lip and whimpers. “The best part…” you begin to moan which causes him to get more comfortable. He lets out a sigh of relief, “making love.” He sits up and attaches his lips to your chest. Slowly traveling across your skin with wet kisses and getting to your breasts. You let out a moan of pleasure so loud, you feel almost embarrassed. Almost. But not enough to stop your hunger.

You yank his hair up so you can press your lips to him. He moans in your mouth and the feeling is incredible. Finally, After so long. You moan into his mouth and his hips push up into you, needing more. He grabs your hips and pushes you under. He begins to strip off his clothes with no regard. You take the opportunity to get more comfortable and drag yourself onto the pillows and under the sheets. “Come here,” he whispers and leaps next to you. You giggle and attach your lips again. He slowly thrusts inside you which causes you both to moan out loud. “Fuck, fuck,” he mumbles softly against your lips. “God, you feel so good.” He can’t help but snap up into you.

You moan breathlessly as he begins to take a rhythm. He stares into your eyes, so lustful and lovingly. He leans next to your ear, “my little princess huh?” His hand sneaks to your breast, pinches your nipple gently. “Thinking you could just get away with it?” He pinches it mercifully which causes you to whimper, “imma show you all that you missed.” His hand lets go off your nipple and gains a new target. His thumb circles your clit which causes you to let out a scream like moan. He starts to speed up his movements when you get more loud. You feel as if you could cry as your moans turn into whimpers. “Is my wife too fucked out, hm? Can’t take it?” Your body begins to twitch as you grip his arm. “Fuck, Lix. Just make me finish!” He laughs satisfactorily in your ear and licks it teasingly.

He covers your mouth as you get louder. “I love your noises but we don’t want anyone to interfere.” You roll your eyes as you feel the build up slowly being released. Your body snaps and it all let go, making you tremble and let out a final moan. He pulls out and watches the liquid fall out of you. He smirks at his masterpiece and pulls away but you grip his length. He winces and stares at you. You rub up and down his length, “I want you to finish inside me.” You place it at your entrance and he chokes down a smile. “Just can’t help yourself huh? Want my babies too?” He re enters and you whimper at the overstimulation. “I do, Lixie. I want your babies.”

He practically finishes at your words. It was so sudden, you laughed shocked. He moaned in your ear which made the butterflies in your tummy appear. “That easy huh?” You teased him and he laughed as he flopped on his side. He pulled you into his chest and held you tight. “I’m never gonna let you go again.” You smiled and drew hearts on his chest, “and I’m never gonna leave.” He clears his throat, “this might be a bad time but..” You look up at him. “I know who killed your sister.” I sit up confused. “Don’t worry, I took care of it already.” I blink at him blankly. “Why do you think Chan hasn’t been around?”

~~~

A/n: Thanks so much for the kind comments and waiting so long for this storyyy. But this isn’t the end. What if I told you they met again in another life? Well that story is for another day so.. Stay Tuned for “Mama’s boy!”

#stray kids #stray kids stay #stray kids imagines #stray kids series #straykids hard hours #stray kids smut #skz scenarios #skz imagines #straykids smut #skz x reader #skz smut #skz #lee felix #lee felix smut #felix smut #lee yongbok smut

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princessbrunette · 6 months

Text

wrote this for the ppl who understand that if the cameron’s just paid attention to rafes mental health they wouldn’t be in all the shit they’re in now ……. he needs a hug and attention and love trust me i can fix him ok

cw: angry rafe, daddy issues, that’s it ig

rafe gets angry. real angry.

you know it’s happening again when you’re upstairs in his room, waiting for him to return from the conversation he’s having with his father down stairs. you hear raised voices, nothing out of the ordinary and then his fist pounding straight through a wall. you wasn’t sure what had gone on, but it had to be bad.

it used to frighten you, especially when you’d hear his footsteps thundering up the stairs to evade the situation. good on him for removing himself, you think now, but back then you might’ve stood in the corner of the room not moving, not even breathing as if to try and blend in with the wall completely. you thought alerting him of your existence might make him more mad, maybe direct it at you. you’d let him angrily pace around until he calmed, it was like clockwork. you got used to it, and the anxiety melted away into pity. no one got rafe like you did.

he slams the bedroom door behind him when he storms in and you jump a little at the way it shakes on its hinges. “ffffuck.” he growls, running his hands over his face as he changes his direction on his feet, as if he wanted to do a billion things at once. you see his hand is all fucked up, assumably from punching a hole in the wall.

“what happened, rafe?” you keep your voice calm, edging to the end of the bed closer to where he paces about.

“just— fucking— my dad is the most selfish fucking asshole i’ve ever met. all my hard work, all the shit i was breaking my back to do for him, down the drain i—” he runs a hand over his head, barking out an angry laugh.

“you hurt your hand?” you redirect the conversation. maybe it would help, you thought. he turns his hand over and barely glances over his knuckles, simply shaking it off like that would rid of the injury. he wouldn’t keep his eyes in one place, wouldn’t calm his breathing.

“that doesn’t — fuck— y’don’t get it okay? you don’t hear the way he talks to me i—” he stops where he is, fisting at his eyes with the balls of his hands, mouth gaping a little as he pants. “i don’t mean to freak out, i swear, i just get so mad and then i lose control and it’s — i’m really trying to not — i’m trying for you—” he can’t get his words out, and when he pulls his hands away his brow is creased and he has tears in his eyes. he looks younger like this, stripped back to his most vulnerable state. you instantly hop off the end of the bed, coming to him. he lets you hold his face.

“hey, it’s okay. rafe, it’s okay. i know.” you coo. even that gets him to soften a little bit. no one has ever treat him with patience or care. you’d seen the way the cameron’s treat him. no regard for his mental health, even when it’s so abundantly clear somethings not quite right. he didn’t need to be disciplined more or shut down, he needed to be loved. he needed you.

he looks at you like he’s seeing you for the first time again, his breathing slowing and you pull him to the bed and sit him down, wedging yourself beside him. “s’not your fault, rafe. we can get you some help.”

his eyes drop to his hand, avoidant once more. “i don’t need… i don’t need help— i need my dad to stop—” he goes to raise his voice again but you shush him softly, rubbing circles across his broad back.

“rafe. it’s okay. c’mon. he’ll come around.”

he clenches his jaw, but nods anyway. yeah, he’ll come around.

#rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron prompt #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron drabble

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onlyjaeyun · 1 month

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i’ve been following ur writing for some time now and i do have to agree with that anon who said you did CH dirty. you are a very talented writer so it’s just hard to watch.

you started off CH so strong with the lore and little chapters here and there but as it progressed you kind of just got lazy and it shows. when important events happened in the story, they weren’t conveyed through writing but through the texts (ie the riki and yn fight, that was definitely worth a written chapter) and it was honestly disappointing.

the ending isn’t much to say about either. yn and hoon barely go through development after the letter incident and all of a sudden they’re dating and married with a kid like two chapters later?

idk, if it was a mental health issue then i get that but even then you should’ve just gave it a break and thought everything out more. you could do so much better.

thank you for the feedback!

i wanna put you through the progess of a piece of writing from the POV of a writer okay? now keep in mind: i work two jobs, am a fulltime uni student and the daughter of an immigrant household with two parents who still work most of the day just so you know what else i have to deal with, besides my mental health okay?

now, i started off CH strong right? yes. i uploaded on the daily, fine i chose that. a chapter usually takes me around one hour if i actually sit down and focus on nothing but the chapter itself, which includes IG stories, editing, formatting etc. alright

on top of the daily chapters, i constantly replied to 40+ asks a day, a blessing in disguise because no matter how much i enjoy talking to you guys, the pressure does get worse the bigger that number of my inbox becomes, i hope this makes sense

now, i started CH back in october, right when my semester started, thats why i started off strong but as time went on, my assignments and private life got too busy and i guess i felt entitled enough as a writer to skip a few certain chaps and make life a little easier for me by making them regular chapters instead of written ones.

and this is gonna be my main point: i'm not a machine. i wrote a minimum of 5 THOUSAND words per written chapter, MINIMUM. we're talking about a 5-9 THOUSANDED worded chapter EACH WEEK. which usually took me about 6-7 hours, even allnighters.

yes, i chose to do that and maybe my time management wasn't the best but i had to create a compromise where i wouldnt have let you guys wait for over two months which would have resulted in me losing my motivation completely, and yet still focusing on EXAMS. because you know, i'm a fulltime uni student with TWO jobs 😮‍💨

if YOU think i did CH dirty go write an alternative ending yourself but it should be a minimum of 15 chapters including 5 written ones, with at LEAST 9k words each yeah? i wanna see you manage it all, pls prove me wrong snd show me you're better than me i'm genuinely begging bc it might inspire me to do "better" next time.

as a writer/artist/creator, and i can tell you probably arent one yourself or havent been one for long, the longer smth takes to come to an end the worse the pressure becomes which results in a blockage i dont wish upon my worst enemy i'm being deadass. i dealt with some of the worst writer's block ive had since i started writing literally 12 years ago and you're telling me i should have just "taken a break" and do "better"

i never, ever expected anything from anyone but some of you are so entitled to a writer's time and skill it's giving me a headache. maybe you didn't like the timing and writing of the last few chapters of CH and i guess that's unfortunate but this was so unnecessary because you completely dismissed everything else that could have been going on in my life and even belittled my mental health issues like im some fucking AI writing machine

do better, be nicer, write it yourself if you don't like it i'm so fucking over this

if i had gotten out of my own comfort and wellbeing and have actually written another set of written chapters i would have burned myself completely out. ive been in this fandom for not even a year and have already finished FOUR smaus with 50 chapters each, you do NOT get to tell me what i should or could have done better because you dont even give a fuck about me as a person this is just about receiving what YOU think YOURE entitled to but this is MY art and I will do what I see fit even if it's not what was expected of it because i'm a fucking human being with a life before i'm a writer on tumblr

oh, also: i do this for free ㅤ:) just a reminder :) this is my HOBBY :)

and don't you EVER call me lazy again when it comes to writing because i'm not gonna pour my heart and soul into a fic just for you to call me lazy when i literally wrote 50 THOUSAND words for this fucking fic just for the written chapters

goodbye

#; mailbox 📬#; cold hearts

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siriuslysmoking · 7 days

Text

Stupid

Summary: An unlikely friendship leads into the battlefield together and somehow still stays strong. After Seven years of a full friendship something slips, and it will never be the same.

Warnings: None? Parental issues ig but nothing major.

-Then afterwards we drop into a quiet little place And have a drink or two And then I go and spoil it all By saying somethin' stupid like, "I love you"-

Growing up living next to the Harringtons was different than you expected, between the ages of zero to fifteen you heard parties next door every weekend. Then one weekend they stopped. You couldn't help but notice the lack of cars in the driveway. But Steve was still at school, his parents though, his parents were nowhere to be found.

Four weekends after the parties stopped you decided to confront Steve, you'd barely talked to him before, brief hello's after school, small waves through your bedroom windows, maybe a head nod of acknowledgement in the school hallways.

When you got home from school you saw the lights of a TV flickering in the window, you decided to finally talk to him. Knocking on the door you heard some shuffling from the otherside of the door. You watched as Fifteen year old Steve opened the door lazily.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm coming in." You said with a smile.

"You can't just come in." He huffs, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yes. I can." You wait until he moves to the side, granting you access to the house.

You tried not to notice the mess, but you couldn't help looking around the house you've never been in before.

"What do you need?"

"I don't need anything." You turn to him in the entryway.

"Then why are you here, bothering me."

"Oh, I'm a joy to be around, I'm not a bother."

"Alright, sunshine, What do you not need?" He rolls his eyes, leaning against the doorframe.

"I think you need something, actually, not me."

"Okay, Genie, what do I need?" He jokes sarcastically.

"A friend."

"I have friends."

"Not those types of friends, friends that don't care about what you're actually thinking." You smile softly.

"If you came here just to make me feel bad about myself, feel free to leave-"

"Where are your parents Steve?" You interrupt him, cutting to the chase.

"What?"

"Where are you parents? Every Night for the past four weeks your driveway has been empty, The shrubs are overgrown and your mother always took care of those. The house has been silent every weekend. What I'm asking is, where are you parents."

"I uh..." he pauses, something seems to be caught in his throat that he just is not willing to let go.

"You don't have to tell me, but it has to get lonely in here, if you want some company, I'm just next door." You leave a smile and turn to leave.

The next time you see Steve is two nights later, you spot him while you're laying in bed with a book. He opens his window and motions for you to do the same, you learn outside the window and give him a questioning gaze.

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"Yeah, I'll bring popcorn." You smile, you didn't expect him to accept your offer of being friends, but you're happy he did.

"Thanks Sunshine."

Seven years later Steve and you have been through thick and thin, from teenage breakups, parent issues, and interdimensional creatures. Still your friendship was somehow still growing bigger.

As the party died down you walked your guests out, thanking them for coming, and the housewarming gifts.

Once everyone leaves it's just you and Steve, the two of you clean up together and once you both are done you pour a glass of wine for the both of you. You hand Steve his as you both settle onto the couch. "Thanks, Sunny."

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"I'll get some popcorn." Steve says sitting up and moving to the kitchen, "Pick out a movie, just nothing too geeky."

"Hey! My movie picks are far superior than yours."

"Don't insult my movie preferences, I worked at Family Video for a year!" He shouts from the kitchen.

"Yeah until the government paid us off for our silence."

He returns with a bag of popcorn.

"Did you burn it again?" It wasn't even a question at this point.

"I take offense to that! I am fully capable of making popcorn."

"You may be able to make a beautiful fettuccine but popcorn is not your forte." He scoffs as he opens the bag and then the smell comes... "Steve, I swear."

"I didn't mean to!" He yells, you grab the bag as you rush to the trash to throw it out and open up a window.

"You are forever off popcorn duty." You shout behind you, throwing in a new bag. "The fact that you do it every time astounds me."

Once a fresh bag is made, you snuggle up with a blanket on the couch.

Halfway through the movie Steve lays his head down on your lap, you slowly run your fingers through his hair, you hear his breathing start to grow smoother and slower. You let him sleep through the movie so he'll not be so tired for his drive home. But looking at the time he should probably just stay the night

Once the movie is over you shake Steve awake, since it's so late you tell him to stay the night, he holds no argument and just follows you back to your room, once he's changed and you've both brushed your teeth.

"Night Stevie."

"I love you, Sunny." He's said it a million times over the past seven years, but this time... this time I just felt different. His heavy eyes held something that's never been aimed in your direction before. You can't get yourself to let words out, His throat sounds tight when he whispers shakily, "I'm so in love with you, it's almost painful to see you knowing that you don't know that I am utterly enamored with you. You are my universe, my star, my sky, my Sunny. And I'm sorry, I'm ruining the best thing I've ever had saying this, but I can't go another day without knowing your feelings."

You just stare at him for what feels like hours, days, years. You only escape your mind when Steve suddenly sits up, saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry-"

He says it over and over that it doesn't even sound like a word anymore. "I shouldn't have- I'm sorry."

"Steve," You murmur, standing up and rounding the bed to try to stop him from getting dressed.

"I'm so sorry, Sunny-" He's buttoning his jeans when you place your hands on his cheek, you only realize then that he let the clawing tears escape his eyes.

"Stop." You look at him softly, "Steve, I need you to breathe."

You hear him take a deep shaky breath, "I didn't want to ruin this-"

"Steve, you didn't ruin anything." You say with a soft smile.

"I- I didn't?"

You shake your head slowly, "I love you so much Steve that it consumes me, sometimes it's all I am, the love I have for you, and it's only grown over the years now that I know you."

"No..." He looks relieved, "Really?"

"Yes, Steve." You move one of your hands into his hair, it's the best way to soothe him. "So much that Robin considered calling a doctor."

He smiles into your hands, "Can I kiss you now?"

"You don't need to ask, you never need to ask." Then his lips meet your and it was like coming up for air after being stuck underwater for a lifetime.

"I love you, I love you, I love you." He repeats into your lips with a smile. Once you separate he rests his forehead on yours, "I love how you know me, I love how you love me."

Because to be loved is to be known.

Likes and Reblogs are appreciated <3

#Spotify #steve harrington x plus size!reader #steve harrington x reader #steve harrigton x reader #steve x plus size reader #steve harrington x plus sized reader #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things au

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angsty-twihardxx · 1 year

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Hi🥀,

I was wondering if you can write Tommy has reader sit in front of a mirror and Tommy is behind reader. He decides to finger reader in front of the mirror while having reader being forced to watch themselves by holding reader by the throat. He makes them come a couple of time and the reader squirts to. Also, he praises reader a lot, does nipple play, a lot of neck kisses, and giving reader hickey’s

A/N: This drove me insaaaane, I just had to do it to em, I’ve added this to a lil series with inexperienced reader. It can be read as its own stand alone fic, bit it also works as a sequel to the first, Riding Lessons.

Anyway I hope this tames you horny beasts, plz feel free to send me some more smut ideas/requests for this sexy Texan. No use of y/n. My apologies if this is crap, I’m just built that way ig *shrugs

Warnings: 18+ (minors go play Fortnite or sm) smut obvi, fingering, reader squirts good for her. Idk if this is deserves a warning but reader is very new to sex, but its okay because Tommy is very reassuring. Mentions of body issues, talk of not feeling good enough that kinda jazz. But again don’t worry Tommy makes ya feel good. Ya‘lol are beautiful and ily

P.S: My computer decided to die so we have to do this on mobile so wish me luck x

EYES ON ME | T.MILLER

*his lil smirk*

You thought that maybe you were having a panic attack by how tight your chest felt, your heart was beating way faster than you usually would first thing in the morning. Sitting up you wiped the thin layer of precipitation off your head, which usually only ever happened when you had a nightmare, which you definitely did not have.

Your thighs vibrated at the memory of your dream from before, Tommy’s warm grip that scratched against the soft doughy skin of your hips. His touch on you was hard, the polar opposite to what he had been the entirety of your relationship.

You didn’t realise how much you missed it, his thick fingers digging into you as he rocked your hips along his clothed thigh. Even though it had been nearly a week since the night of your first orgasm, it was all that you could think about. The way that your entire body shook as you were completely overwhelmed with pleasure, you wanted Tommy to make you feel like that again.

After stretching you rolled around to see his beautiful freckled face, but instead you were met with his cold pillow. The frown that began forming on your forehead weakened at the small crinkled piece of paper with his handwriting on it. ‘In town for breakfast, see you there.’

. . .

The morning air was still frosty despite the warm glow from the sun on your face and shoulders. Even though you were wrapped up in thick jackets, including one of Tommy’s very own button downs, you were still freezing. You found Tommy sitting on an old bench in front of large dining hall as he waited for you, his hands sat in his pockets as he turned to see you walking towards him. His moustache tipping upwards, returning your curt wave with a wide smile.

Everything just felt easier with him now, there was no sexual tension that was always weighing heavy on your shoulders every time he was around you. Not that there was any pressure ever with him, it was only ever pressure that you placed. On yourself out of fear.

There was no longer a voice in your head that pressured you into doing anything out of fear of being left for someone more experienced. None of that mattered now because the two of you were happy, you were happy. Even though you hadnt ‘gone all the way’, you still felt comfortable knowing that he would guide you.

His arm moved to wrap around your shoulders as you dropped down in the empty spot beside him, using his arm to pull you into his chest he pressed a soft kiss in your hair. “Here, managed to get one extra for you.” Tommy nudged your shoulder as he handed you the sandwich, still warm wrapped neatly in wax paper. Food came in plentifuls in Jackson, but if you wanted one of Maria’s freshly made sandwiches you’d had to get in early.

“Startin’ to think you might love her more than me.” Tommy chuckled to himself as he watched you devour the food like it was the first meal you’ve eaten in weeks, which was definitely not true. “Well I guess it comes down to your sandwich making abilities.” You quipped back in between bites.

“Looks like I don’t stand a chance.” Tommy pretended to pout before dropping his head into the crook of your neck. His moustache ticked the soft skin of your neck as he peppered you with kisses. “Oh baby, that reminds me, how did you sleep last night?” Tommy teased, knowing fully well how you slept. Only imagining what it was doing to you, when you sent stiff in his arms.

The main reason Tommy was up so early was due to the wet dream you seemed to be having. If neither of you had work today he would’ve done something about it.

Tommy adjusted himself, just the memory of your sleepy voice moaning his name had his blood rushing down to his dick. You were driving him insane, and you didn’t even have a clue. He cooed playfully as he watched your cheeks warm up, you simply nodded in response knowing that if you spoke your words would fail you.

“I sure hope so because I got a little plan for us tonight. How’s that sound baby? You up for another lesson?”

Your body stiffened as you felt his hand grasp tightly onto your thigh, darting your eyes around you checked to see if anyone was watching. Was he really doing this in the middle of town? “It’s alright darlin’ no one’s payin’ attention to us, what’d’ya say?” All you could concentrate on was how his breathe fanned against your ear as his rough hand tightened on your soft skin. All of it made your body crave him more, you couldn’t think of anything better. “I think that sounds perfect Tommy.” His grip on your leg softened, clapping against your denim jeans before standing up with a groan.

“Well in that case, I’ll see you tonight.” He sent a wink your way before turning to walk away, leaving you turned on to the max. He was going to be the death of you.

. . .

Your fingers rapped on top of the hardwood table as your eyes impatiently hovered by your front door, which remained unopened. As the hours ticked by, the more restless you were becoming. The second plate of food beside you had long gone cold, as did the arousal you had been harbouring onto all day.

You had now grown tired, after a long day working in the stables all you wanted to do was cuddle up with Tommy till you fell asleep.

You knew better than to be upset with him, he worked hard in Jackson. He made an effort to earn his keep, whether it was helping with patrols or assisting in construction. It made you happy knowing that he was finding his purpose in his new life, but it just felt at times that you were moved to the back burner.

It definitely didn’t help when you went upstairs to shower, you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. To say it was a kick in the guts was an understatement. Even though looks wasn’t a priority in the post-apocalyptic world, you couldn’t help feeling inadequate. Your skin was flushed after standing under the hot water. Your hair was always messy, you wondered what Tommy saw cause it surely couldn’t have been what you were currently looking at. Could it?

It was a dangerous rope you were balancing on, you knew you had better things to be worrying about than your own appearance. You wish you could stop.

That was how you ended up in your bed, wrapped up in blankets with a book in your lap. Reading the small print you tried to keep your mind busy, so you didn’t get yourself again. You were so enthralled by your book that you didn’t even hear your front door open.

Tommy leant against the door frame as he watched you. He noticed the frown forming on your forehead, and the way your bottom lip stuck out. He felt so bad being late home again, Tommy was never good at time management, or maybe it was the fact that he could never so no.

Right when he was finishing up the barn he was constructing, Maria had come by and asked to see if someone could come and fix the light in the projector at the cinema. He knew he should’ve just left it and gone home to you, but he knew the guilt would’ve eaten away at him.

You were alerted of his presence when he cleared his throat, you saw him propped against the doorframe. He sent an apologetic smile your way, his brows tipping upwards when your eyes met. “M’sorry I’m late baby, I got caught up with some work.”

“It’s alright. Dinners in the oven by the way.” You murmured with a tight lipped smile, hoping he wouldn’t notice your teary eyes. “Thanks darlin’ I’ll pack it up for tomorrow. Maria made us some food as a thank you— which reminds me. They got some pretty good movies they salvaged, some space one I reckon you’ll enjoy.” Tommy smiled like a happy child before retreating to the kitchen, which was pretty perfect timing because he missed the way your smile dropped.

‘It’s just Maria, you have nothing to worry about.’ You tried convincing yourself but it was no use. Your eyes already began to water, Maria was nice— you liked Maria.

Like a cruel monologue your mind gave you a list of reasons why she was better than you. To start she was confident, being in charge of an entire commune she was smart and well liked by literally everyone. So it would make sense that Tommy would like her too right?

“Hey everythin’ alright in here?” Tommy startled you as he was suddenly behind you on the bed. You quietly tried to wipe the tears from your cheeks. “Y-yeah I’m alright. M’sorry just tired.”

Tommy tilted his head in a frown, he knew you better than to believe you. “C’mon talk to me darlin’” His hand fell to give your thigh a gentle squeeze, contrasting his grip on you this morning. You would do anything to be in that moment with him again, not like now where his sad eyes watched you intensely.

“I- it’s nothin’ Tommy.” You tried to shrug him off again, but of course it didn’t work. He cocked a sceptical brow your way, you hated how well he knew you.

“It’s so stupid.” You groaned into your palms, so embarrassed of your own stupid brain working against you. “I just- I don’t know what it is you even like about me, I mean let’s be real I’m nothing like half the girls in Jackson and I—“

Tommy’s lips muted the worrying in your mind, his lips danced with yours. You pressed back on his lips, when you kissed him it felt like nothing else mattered to you. Not some teenage insecurities, Tommy was a man not a stupid teenage boy— and even better he was your man.

“Now where’s all this coming from, hm?” He brought his hand up to cup your cheek, his soft brown eyes peered up at you like you could tell him everything. You could tell him everything, but that could wait, right now you just wanted him.

“It doesn’t matter, can you just kiss me?”

“That I can do.” He chuckled before bringing his lips back onto yours. You pushed hard with a fever, the fire being ignited inside you again as a moan escaped your lips. His hands grasped your cheeks, pushing you even closer to him if that was even possible. Tommy lifted you to straddle on his lap, as instinct your hips grinder on his crotch. God you wanted him so badly.

“Didn’t you say you had a little lesson planned for me?” You breathed into him between hunger-filled kisses. Tommy looked up at you in what seemed to be a mix of surprise and excitement, never did he see you so confident, he loved it.

The glint of mischief in his eyes returned, he took your clothes off in a fever. Your eyes fell to the ground out of instinct, avoiding your reflection in the mirror. You suddenly became hyper aware of how vulnerable you were, Tommy had never seen you completely naked before. He offered to sit in between his lap on the edge of your bed. “Y’know I think you're beautiful right? I mean can you blame me?”

His large hands softly climbed up your side till his fingers danced along your shoulders as he moved the strand of hair that exposed the nape of your neck. You felt like a lightning bolt struck through your core as his lips sucked onto you softly.

You let out a moan as his free hand moved to grasp your entire breast in one hand, he kneaded the soft skin and the familiar feeling of arousal pooled in between your legs. Tommy noticed how your legs clenched when he flicked your now budded nipples. Soft moans mewled from your open mouth as your head fell back onto his shoulder.

“Nu-huh baby, I want your eyes on me.” Tommy tapped your cheek, bringing your attention back to the room. You looked at him confused, “But I- I am—“

“‘Not at me, me.” Tommy nodded his head towards the mirror in front of you- “‘Oh.”

“Can I try somethin’ else with you baby?” You felt a shiver down your spine as he whispered into your ear, his eyes met yours in the mirror. “What is it?”

Without answering Tommy pushed your knees to the side, exposing your eager pussy. “D’you trust me baby?”

“‘Yes.” You murmured as you felt your body tremble in nerves but also as much eagerness. There wasn’t anything you wanted more right now than Tommy’s hands on you.

Your skin burned as his rough fingers grazed the inside of your thigh, you followed his fingers in the mirror as he moved painfully slowly to where you needed him the most. Your hips bucked against his touch, showing him exactly where you wanted those fingers.

“So eager darlin’”

“Tommy please.” You whined as your back curving instinctively, rocking your hips against where his dormant fingers laid dangerously close to your exposed cunt.

You let out a surprised gasp, his thick fingers filled you up perfectly. He started off soft, slowly easing in his middle finger as he let you adjust to him. “H-holy shit Tommy.” You breathed as his free hand moved to slowly massage your aching clit. “Yeah? That feel good baby?” He smiled wickedly into your hair as you nodded frantically, pleasure already filling you up as your head dropped back onto his shoulder, but snapping your head up as you remembered his instructions. “Tell me how good it feels darlin’” Tommy’s voice was at least an octave lower, sending more chills down your spine.

“S’really fucken good Tommy.” You gasped as you felt his finger stretching you open, if this was how good it felt to have his fingers in you you could only imagine what his dick would feel like.

Pressure in your stomach began to build as his pace quickened. You felt your orgasm coming quicker then last time, you welcomed it as you rocked your hips involuntary pushing his finger in deeper.

“That’s it baby, y’doing so fucken good.” He brought his mouth down to suck at the soft skin on your neck, while his hand pumped into you relentlessly. “Tommy!” You screamed as you felt your orgasm unravel throughout your entire body, your pussy clenching around his finger as he kept going.

You were a shivering mess, only a mixture of whines and ‘oh my gods’ falling from your already parted mouth.

Your legs still trembled as Tommy soothed you, his hand brushing back the strands of hair that stuck to your forehead. “Good job baby, you did so good for me.” He cooed into your hair, pressing gentle kisses as your chest heaved.

That was when you realised, nothing else mattered. Tommy was the one making you feel this good, no one else. He cemented that as he repeated in your ear how much he loved you, his facial hair tickling your already sensitive skin as he did so. God you really did love this man, huh?

“Y’reckon you could go again for me?”

All you could was nod in response, your mind feeling like it was going a million miles a minute. He didn’t start straight away though, he was patient with you. He waited for your heart to start beating at a normal pace before bringing his fingers back to your aching hole, you watched as he added another finger.

Filthy moans filled the air as you adjusted to his extra finger inside you, you felt like you were being stretched open. Already your hips were shaking, his thick fingers felt like they were hitting your cervix. It was almost hypnotic, watching the way his fingers would disappear in between your folds before pulling back out just as swiftly.

His free hand remained glued to your now swollen clit, as he menacingly taunted it with his rough fingers. Only egging on your climax more and more.

No words fell from your lips anymore, Tommy had basically turned you into a writhing mess as your stomach tightened.

For a very brief moment it felt like you weren’t a world where you had to survive with Cordyceps and people that hunted and killed, it was simply you and Tommy in this room. That was how you wanted it.

The feeling was getting so intense you shut your eyes out of instinct. With your eyes closed you could concentrate on the way your hips rocked with each thrust of his hand, you knew you weren’t going to last long.

“Eyes up, I want you to watch.” Tommy growled as his free hand moved up to envelope your neck, not hard but enough to bring your head up to catch a glimpse of your position in the mirror. His thick fingers around you shouldn’t make you even more aroused, should it?

“Good girl.” He was going to be the death of you.

“Fuck!” Your eyes squinted shut as you felt the tight knot in your stomach unravelled again, but this time it was so much better. Almost like a gush erupted from you. Your ears rang as your eyes squinted shut, suddenly overly aware of the bright light that overhang your bed.

Your second orgasm in a row felt like a hundred times more intense, it felt like your whole body was vibrating. Like you were going a million miles a minute, or maybe it was the room that was spinning.

“You okay baby? You did so good for me.” His voice was soft as he turned to face you properly now, his eyes checked you over one last time. He looked at you with nothing short of amazement and you wish that he never stopped.

After a few seconds you came back to, your eyes just stuck to the ceiling as your chest heaved while you tried to catch your breath. Then you noticed the warmth pooling on your bedsheets, Tommy noticed your confusion and gave you a reassuring squeeze.

“You fucken squirted baby.” He breathed out in amazement.

“Bet you never knew you could do that.” Tommy hummed in amusement as he looked down to where he held you. Your cheeks were rosy as your half-lidded eyes connected with his, a dopey smile grew on his lips.

“If I did I would’ve brought a towel.” You couldn’t help the laugh that fell from your lips, amusement filling the room as the two of you chuckled together. You loved how easy it was for the two of you, even after he stole a second orgasm from you he could make you laugh. It was his Texan charm, according to Tommy but you knew it was just him.

“C’mon darlin’ let’s get you cleaned up.” He pressed a chaste kiss on your cheek before standing up with you in front of him, your legs quivered as you stood up for the first time in what felt like forever. “Tommy? I don’t think I can walk.” You looked up at him with worry, was this normal?

“It’s okay baby, it means I’m doing my job right.”

He thought about what you were saying when he found you crying in your bed, how you didn’t know what he saw in you. There was never just one singular thing, a multitude of reasons that he loved you. And the fact you didn’t see a reason why he would love you dumbfounded him. He was going to do everything in his power to make sure you knew.

#tommy miller #Tommy miller tlou hbo #Tommy miller smut #Tommy miller x reader #Tommy miller x y/n #Tommy miller x you #tommy miller fanfic #tommy miller fanfic smut #tommy miller tlou #tommy miller x female reader #tommy miller fluff #tommy miller fic #Gabriel Luna #gabriel luna x reader #tlou fic #tlou fanfic #tlou hbo fic

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hadesisonlyalad · 4 months

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yk i dont post a lot on tumblr but we all saw that red flags post so im gonna take a moment of ur time to say something on each merc and the red flags listed for them. im doing a read more incase u havent seen the “mercs red flags” headcanon post and it does not flood ur page

both the medic and engie things with “not wanting to spend time with you/wont make time for you” is SUCH bullshit if that was the case they wouldnt even date you. and then ur telling me engie tf2, DELL CONAGHER, would NEVER want to take you on a date? like ever??? u are INSANE. And then sorry to tackle medic and engie in the same paragraph but they had a lot of common “””””red flags””””” that were listed. why would he yell at you. he hardly even yells in general (based off comics and voice lines) if anything hes just kinda a loud person 💀 AND YOU BRINGING UP ONE THING WONT MAKE HIM SUDDENLY IGNORE YOU FOR DAYS LIKE?? he KNOWS hes committing medical malpractice btw. he would not leave you for bringing that up he is WELL AWARE of what hes doing. and we see him CANONICALLY DISCIPLINE ARCHIMEDES IN MEET THE MEDIC, WHY WOULD HE TOLERATE HIS BIRDS ATTACKING YOU????

also why are we listing an addiction as a “red flag” what the fuck is wrong with you. i get not wanting to date someone with an addiction, its a valid concern, but thats SO much more serious than a “red flag” or “ick”??? LIKE ARE YOU OKAYYYY???????

AND THEN HEAVY’S RED FLAG IS “he has trauma” FUCKING. PACK IT UP GUYS IG IF YOU HAVE TRAUMA YOU CAN NEVER BE IN A RELATIONSHIP. (/s) WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

i’m fine with the miss pauling ones, at least two of them, because yeah, it’s canon that she doesn’t have the most time and i imagine if ur not a merc or work in that area a relationship might be a bit hard? but shes an honest person, i don’t think she’s gonna lie to you. idk im very neutral about the pauling ones, if anything theyre the most in character of this shithole list.

all i have to say for pyro is like. yk those people who hc pyro as aroace except theyre super weird about it? like theyre either infantilizing them or have weird ableist feelings about pyro? yeah thats the vibes im getting. actually wait where did u pull codependent pyro from actually wtf

i think the “tryna live like hes 20” thing for spy is really fucking funny 💀 like go girl go live through that middle age crisis!!/j no but seriously. hes dating you hes gonna think you’re a 10, and even then YOU’RE SAYING IF YOU AGE AT ALL HE’LL LEAVE YOU??? CANON MILF LOVER SPY. “OFF TO VISIT YOUR MOTHER!” SPY TF2. WILL LEAVE YOU IF YOU GET OLD AND AGE AT ALL…? HE LIKES HIS WOMEN LIKE HE LIKES HIS WINE MOTHERFUCKER: AGED. sorry bad joke lets keep going uh- i think the other hcs are garbage too i just really hate specifically this spy hc. just this one specifically.

im not a sniper connoisseur, my friend will is way better versed in sniper’s characterization, but even i know this isnt sniper. “thinks if he argues long enough he’ll win”…? “cannot support you in anything”?!!?! “IF YOU’RE HIS FRIEND AND YOU TWO GET INTO A BAD ARGUMENT PREPARE TO NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN” IM GENUINELY AT A LOSS FOR WORDS. I JUST. I DONT..? WHAT DO I EVEN SAY. I DONT K N O W WHAT TO SAY. BUT IF I DID KNOW WHAT TO SAY I’D BE SAYING VERY BAD THINGS.

i dont think scout is misogynistic- i see why people think that but me personally i just think he has no game and people mistake it as violent misogyny for some reason. but. listen we know scout is a dick we do okay but he loves women. why would he cheat on you.? bro he’d be glad u picked him 😭 AND THEN THE PERIOD THING?? he was raised by a SINGLE MOM do you REALLY think shes gonna raise him and let him think that way about a natural body function. im speaking entirely from the single mom experience and the answer is NO!!!! also how is loving your mother a red flag. being the youngest child is also a red flag, i guess. and having issues with his dad. (/s) also, second verse same as the first: IF HES DATING YOU HE THINKS YOU’RE A 10 WHAT IS SO HARD TO FUCKING GET ABOUT THISHXWHBVWBWBXvqvsbs?1?2!2’wndjwke

uhhh soldier wasnt. here for some reason. so nothing to say about him.

anyway leave ur opinions below. i rly dont wanna get into any tumblr drama or internet drama at all bc it scares me dearly and im always self conscious about leaving a bad digital footprint especially over something as petty as tf2 drama but i cannot stand for this slander I CANNOT‼️‼️‼️‼️ sorry if u also think im mischaracterizing anyone here i only put hours of studying into my fav mercs and thats. abt it,, listen im silly okay

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #heavy tf2 #engineer tf2 #scout tf2 #spy tf2 #soldier tf2 #pyro tf2 #demo tf2 #tf2 demoman #ms pauling #sniper tf2 #medic tf2 #guys im going insane #i hate this fucking red flags post im so sorry i had to let it be known #reblog or comment ur opinions ig im also curious

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memyselfandmya · 14 hours

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RAW REACTIONS TO JWCT

Spoilers below the cut, and warning it's long. My thoughts are all over the place rn so you'll get more organized posts tomorrow

Ep. 1

“Just the one.” FML

Darius you’re such a funny little guy

“I’m not talking about the island I’m talking about what happened after.” AHHHHHHH. The way this line was delivered and animated.

The family photos on the wall feel so symbolic.

It’s sad how Darius has to go through this process of grief again.

What’s Brand doing to get himself into trouble?

*soft music plays* “And here with me live are the improbable survivors of the Jurassic World incident, the Nublar Six” CAN YOU HEAR ME FUCKING SOBBING.

Ben scrunched over that little compute please I can’t 😭

What’s especially sad about Darius’ grief is that he’s not just sad and depressed as if he’s accepted her death, it’s that he pushed himself into a sort of state of almost denial where he’s still calling her and stuff.

These raptors are freaky

1st episode over yayyyy

Ep. 2

Not the keys Darius

The tensionnn

Ben and his driving skills

Ben’s poor van

Ben still being the well prepared man he is

Ben…I’m concerned what is that board you have going on there

Why are these grown ass men living such horrible lives? Eating canned cheese out of a dirty mug? A spoon in a boot that makes sloshing noise?

Ben back at it w the shaving cream/ whipped cream.

Darius is so unconvinced

BEN throwing Darius phone out like it was nothing plssss and his reaction

BROOKLYNN I MISS YOU

She’s so pretty though

Very ominous great way to emphasize Ben’s paranoia

These poor traumatized kids

“Is your friend okay?” “No.” PLSS I’m glad he knows it

THE FUCKING FORESHADOWING

OH THE SUSPENSE

Ep. 3

Sammy’s ranch is so cuteeee

SAMMY MI AMOR THEIR REUNION IS JUST SO PRECIOUS

The locs thing omg

“Have you seen my pitchfork” she asks casually as if she’s a witch hunter during the Salem witch trials

What do you mean Sammy isn’t talking to her parents

Their reunion is soooo cute

Sammy you are a queen and I love you.

FUCK YOU CARL

I forgot we were in Texas lmao

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT’S SAMMY SEEING BROOKLYNN FOR ME 😭 now it’s definitely for sure that Sammy died her hair in honor of B. Brooklynn’s jacket 😭

SAMMY 😭😭😭 “or Yaz pulling away from me”

FUCK OH MY GOD CARLS DEAD

Got me ugly crying

Ep. 4

Darius’ humor is immaculate

Everybody’s calling Ben by his full name and I love it

WHAT? GIRLFRIEND??

Nooo the brothers are fighting

Kenji has… downgraded

Oop- no the money loss

Sammy that kick was awesome marry me plz wait no u have Yaz marry her and then marry me

I knew they were fighting but god damn he rlly just shut the door or Darius like that

Kenji I love you dude but take this seriously

Ooh the tension

Ouch, brooklynns death

Double ouch, Kenji blames Darius. Of course

OH MY GOD HE’S OUT OF PRISON

“Once you lose my trust, you lose it. Forever.” Damn. Hang on let me go check off Kenji and his daddy issues off my bingo card rq

The girlies aren’t in a good place 😭😭 “why did she say something?” Plssss

I love how Sammy car jacked Ben by tickling him for his keys

Them abandoning Darius with Kenji 💀

I love the rock climbing scene

“where were you the night Brooklynn died?” Oop- we’re doing up this now?

OH!? oh

Awww fuckkkkkk 😭

That’s another mark on my card

YAY BROOKENJI IS OVER

but also damn… poor Kenji

“Wait how do I get back down?” You’re so real Darius

Aww bumpy noooo

Ep. 5

DANG THAT COMPY GOT SWEPT UP

“Hey that song kinda reminds me of that” *turns music off* oh

“Not taking family advice from a kid who hasn’t called his own mother in over a month.” OH. WERE YOU SILENT OR WERE YOU SILENCED. THE BOYS ARE TAKING SHOTS AT EACH OTHER

YASAMMY

“Oh yeah, Darius warned me. LMFAO

Ohh she told you Benjamin. No more carob.

The gyrosphereeeee

Oh fuck this guy whoever you are.

“Free the Dino’s.” YESSSSSSSS

I had a feeling we’d see kenjis dad

“Did you have Brooklynn killed?” Oh going in hot ig

Oh shit- DAMN BEN AFTER ALL THIS TIME

OK, I feel bad for Sammy because even after all of these years, she makes one mistake by spying for mantah corp and people still kind of hold it over her head, even her best friends. that must suck

Ooh the tension

“Don’t do the Japanese thing. You know I don’t speak it.” Ooh we’re bringing the culture too! JW ain’t playing

Oh shit-

YOU DONT MANIPULATE MY SON ANYMORE OH SHITTTTTT

AHHH SAMMMYYYYYYYY

I love how Ben and Sammy take down a Dino abuser just as a little side quest

Aww they’re so cute OH MY GOD WTF HE’S THE “WEVE GOT A PROBLEM DUDE”???

Poor kenji THATS RIGHT YOU STAND UP TO HIM KENJI FUCK YOU DANIEL

“Im not afraid to get my hands dirty” oh shit-

OH FUCK CAN THEY CAMOUFLAGE??

OHH SHIT

WHO TF IS THAT SHE LOOK LIKE A FUCKING DOLL I WANT MY MOM HELP

FUCK OH MY GOD FUCK WHAT THE HELL

POOR KENJI

THAT CANT BE A FUCKING REAL PERSON

WHO TF IS THAT IN THE CAR??

AWWWWWWWW FUCK KENJI IM SO SORRY

Ep.6

YAZ MY SWEET GIRLY HIIII AWW POOR GIRLY DAMN NOT EVEN A FULL MINUTE IN AND WERE ALREADY BRUNGING IN THE TRAUMA

she’s so pretty thoughhhh

Aww brooklynnn

AWW THE BABY TALK

Aww the trauma poor baby I just wanna give her a hug

“Any particular reason I’m here and not Sammy?” Ooohh

Awwwww

Yaz I love you. You’re so pretty, and cool, and just a bunch of good things

OH MU GOD THAT PIC OF THEM IS SO CUTE

Are you gonna answer the phone Yaz?

YAYYYY SHE PICKED UP

MY GIRLIES I LOVE THEM

“Wait you’re coming here?” You can hear the panic in her voice.

IM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU YAZ

Yaz is definitely suspicious.

AHHH THEY SAID THE L WORD

I love this episode already

It’s so amazing that they’re actually addressing their mental health. I don’t think I’ve ever heard children’s shows say the words traumatizing and ptsd.

Oop. So this is where you live Yaz?

Awwwwww she’s waiting for them AWWWWWWWWWWWW (MORE LIKE A SHRILL SHRIEK) THEYRE REUNITED

I LOVE THEM SO MUCH IM CRYING

Awww I love Ben and Yazs friendship so much

Ooh time to drop the news

This place is so pretty and nice and Yaz genuinely seems to be happy. Also she knows people :)

“Benny Boy.” Aww

Sammy is not enjoying this place lmao

“You’re favorite.” Oop-

UH OH IM SCARED I DONT WANT TO SEE THEM FIGHT I THOUGHT I WAS READY BUT I DONT KNOW

WE GIT THE SCENE

BEN GET YIUR GOOFY ASS OFF THE GROUND

IM SCAREDDDDD

Oh shit

AHHHHH

OH FUCK FUCK I DONT WANT TO SEE THEM AGRUE DIDNT WE HAVE ENOUGH OF THAT IN CAMP CRETACEOUS

I love that Sammy is trying to protect Yaz but she is taking it a little too far. Ben is me, I can’t see I’m blinddddd blinddddd blindddd

But also Yaz you didn’t keep in contact??

Oh shit Yaz has a point though *shrieking*

Not the fucking time Ben

I take it back this isn’t my favorite episode I don’t love this episode

Ben struggling to give advice plssss. I love you dude

I love Yaz and Ben’s friendship so much though

“When me and my girlfriend—“ the swoop up, like right Yaz. “I’m sorry girlfriend?” Right. That’s what we’re all wondering

“Why does everyone act so surprised when I say that?” BECAUSE YOU’RE GAY??

OH FUCK OH FUCK PEOPLE ARE DYING OH FUCK RICH DIED

I DONT KNOW WHO HE IS BUT HE IS DEWD. EATEN. GONE OH SHIT POOR YAZ

aww poor Sammy I just thinks Yaz needs some great room.

Sammy was definitely abt to say “how the hell”

WE GOT THE OTHER SCENE

The little side eye Ben gives Yaz after “big Ben’s got moves” <3<3

OH FUCK THEY ARE TRAPPEDOh dpw is here they got it

the little hand hold <3<3

OH FUCK THE DPW IS NOT THERE THEY DONT GOT IT THE DPW IS MAKING IT WORSE FUCK I HAD A FEELING

OH FUCK THEYRE FAKLING IN THE WATER

OH MY GOD WTF

Ep. 7

Oh they are under under.

My worst fear lowkey

oh shit…

OH SHIT THEY ARE SO CUTE AWWWW

poor kenji… awww fuck this is so sad.

Who is this guy??

Uh oh… the dpw

Kenji poor baby

WHAT ARE YALL JUST DOUING SITTING THERE???

Ben really? Ductape

That’s my strong girls

Nah this shit is terrifying

Oh thank god

Oh shit we’re finding out what happened

Aww a little girl

Oop corruption… but for a good cause?

Oh shit

How tf did Brooklynn not feel those footsteps?

Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck.

Is Brooklynn actually dead? Moment of truth.

Awww no no no no 😭 Darius fuckkkkk 😢

I can’t believe they actually showed a pool if blood. Brooklynns pool of blood

Wait so they saw her dead body? So she’s actually dead? Or what?

Oh fuckkkkkklk 😖

STOP 😭

AWWW YASAMMY IS SO FUCKING CUTW AWWWWv

Not the random Italian 😭

OOH FUCK NOT THE PASSWORD UH OH

STFU DUDE

Ben was WAITING to throw those phones

Yaz I love you. “I am so going to haunt them from beyond the grave.”

I KNEW THE ROOM WE SAW WAS BROOKLYNN’S PLACE

Her house is so cuteeee

Please Sammy your voicemail 😭 I love how we’re getting to hear everyone’s voicemail

Awww

Oooh the plot thickens

Oh shitttt BROOKLYNN WTF ARE U DOING?

A FEW MILLION?? PASS THAT ON OVER RIGHT OVER HERE

OH SHIT

Ep. 8

WTF ARE YALL DOING WHY ARE YOU DIRECTLY IN THE CAGE WITH THE DINO ARE YOU ACTUALLY INSANE ATP YOU’RE GIVING IT A FREE MEAL YAZ WTF ARE YOU DOING YALL ARE TESTING FATE RN

KENJI YOU CANT BE SCREAMING LIKE THAT ALSO WTF WAS THAT SCREAM but also I can’t judge that’s me when I see a spider

Oh I forgot abt all of those voicemails Darius sent

Aw lowkey poor dinosaurs

Who is he?

Kenji you’re such a goofball. Eew no I take it back gagging barfing gross wtf

No Brooklynn what’d we say abt the baby talk pls no

Yes, Darius I am sufficiently uncomfortable

Uh oh the boys are tussling I’m getting flashbacks to Ben and Darius

Awww dariusssss 😭

Camp fam try not to get recognized by strangers challenge quick, start

Damnnn Sammy that was smooth.

Darius… why are you in that gross ass tub

Camp fam boys try not to be gross challenge

WHATTT

HANDS TO MY MOUTH IM ACTUALLY SHOOK RN

WDYM “I WAS IN LOVE WITH BROOKLYNN”

I DIDNT THINK THERED BE DINOSTAR WTF

OMG

Please get out of the fucking tub

You don’t know what’s been done in there

Are we just abandoning all self respect we have

HOLY SHIT

oh is it the video? The video of her death?

Bumpyyyy

Oh fuck…

YAZ 😭😭😭 “boo.” Please I love youuu

Right, that’s my reaction lmao

Oop Brooklynns mad

Nah cause she stared at that dinosaur for 3 straight up seconds girl has your time on numblar taught you anything??

In my Abby Lee voice: “BROOKLYNN HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?!”

no wonder your ass got ate

I’m sorry that’s mean.

I love you girly

Oh fuck.

Girly is dead

😭😭😭

“You and me, we’re brothers right?” STOP YOURE BREAKING MY HEART 😭😭😭😭😭

Stoppppp

Will we ever find out why Darius wasn’t there??

Oop dinosaurs

What’s wrong with bumpy??

AHHHH SHE SAID IT SHE SAID THE CHAOS LINE “maybe not”

“What are you looking at?” Pftttt

Uh oh. He’s dead…

Oh well

Oh now they’re really looking

“Yeah I don’t like that at all.” Yeah but I loveeee you Sammy

Ep. 9

Poor Sammy but girl you need to chill

Bumpy???

Awww. I love yasammy and seeing them work through the it issues. ASWWWWWWW

OOH the gangs all here

How tf did Darius and Kenji scale that fence

Oh shit,

Miss ma’am you are too pretty to be participating in nefarious acts like this

Lmfao “okay we get it you’re a climber”

What did I tell you girl? Way too pretty to be doing this shit

Come on Kenji put those protein drinks to work

Yaz wearing a crop top 🥰

Awww bunny nooo fuck fuck

Awww Ben 💔

Oh fuck no I would not be climbing up there

the gangs all here

Okay kenji

Damn Sammy you stay trying to knock kenji out I love you ❤️

Also the part where Yaz is covering both their mouths? So badass

Awww reunion how sweet

PFTTT DARIUS

BUMPY NOOOO 😭

Oh so when they said international they meant international

Oh shit…fuck… Brooklynn :(

LMFAO BEN

Oh…Ben

Bumpy…

OH SHIT BUMPY IS SHE HAVING…

OH WAIT SAMMY’S SO PRETTY

FUCK WAIT BUMPY

NOOOOOOOO WTF

OH WAIT WTF

SAMMMYYYY

STOP FOOLING US

YALL R SO WROMG FOR THAT

LMFA “DON’T THINK ABT IT BUD”

cmon did you rlly have to ruin the happy moment?

Ep. 10

HOLY SHIT LAST EPISODE

Oh the plot THICKENS

SAMMY I LOVE YOU

OKAY BIG BEN OH SHIT BIG BENS DOWN

SAMMY I FUCKING LOVE YOU

OH SHIT OH SHIT THE TENSION IS INCREASING

NOOONOT HER SHE SCARES ME

AHHH I WANNA GO HOME

SHE CANT BE FUCKING REAL

oh shit…

WAIT so it was the atrociraptors that killed Brooklynn???

OH FUCK HOW IS THIS A KIDS SHOW

YOU KNOW WHERE WHAT!?!?

OH FUCK

OH FUCK IT SMELLS THEM

OH SHIT

OH FUCK?

what if it’s Ronnie?

Oh it’s Mateo okay.

TORO??

Aww yasammy

DAMN THAT SHOT WAS COOL THE TREX AND THE EXPLOSION

HE PUNCHED IT

AHHHHHH YAZ SAMMY YASAMMY OH MY GOD “MY GIRL” OH MY FUCKING GODDDD

NOW THAT WAS A SHOT STRAIGHT FROM TEXAS

THE KICK!?.

OH MY GODDDD HES ABOUT TO DO THE THING

HES DOING THE THING OH MY GOD THE PARALLELS

HOLY SHIT THIS SCENE IS INCREDIBLE

THAT FUCKING ROAR

Oh?? The Broker??

HAHAHA THATS WHAT YOU GET

WHY IS THIS BITCH STILL ALIVE AND HERE?

OH FUCK BYE BITCH WITH THAT UGLY ASS HAIRCUT

Lmfao not them shitting on kenjis camper

Are they going to Brooklynn’s apartment?? Abroad??

THE LOOKS OF SHOCK ON THEIR FSCES RIGHT BEN THAT WAS MY REACTION

AWWW NOT THE UNREQUITED LOVE TROPE

AWW FUCK :( :(

YAY WERE GOING ON AN ABROAD JOURNEY

JESUS FUCK MATTEO

OH MY GODDDD WERE GOING ON A TRIP IN OUR FAVORITE CARGOSHIP

RONNIEEEEEE HI DARLING

OH WAIT WTF RONNIE WHATE R U DOING DONT TELL ME…

wait…… is she texting…

Wait wait wait this could be either good or bad but I’m thinking good

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HOLY FUCKING SHIT I WAS RIGHT WE WERE RIGHT RUGHT

OH MY FUCKING GOD OH MY GODDDDDDDD WE WERE RIGHT

OH MY GOD SHES ALIVE AND SHE LOOKS SO BADASSS

#jwct #jurassic world chaos theory #jwct spoilers

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ad0rechuu · 10 months

Text

★ MILKY WAY. ━━ (047) if only she knew

WORD COUNT. 1334

WARNINGS. just awkwardness ig

credits to @ari-shipping-stuff for being my beta reader / writer <33

SEONGHWA’S EYES MOVE OVER HIS FAMILIAR WALLS TO AVOID EMBARRASSING HIMSELF. OR WORSE, SEEMING LIKE A CREEP WATCHING HER.

It sure is an effort, he thinks. It does feel like a whole task to not accidentally let his eyes wander back to his phone screen where she’s deeply focused on tuning her guitar.

“I’m sorry that took a while. I’m not exactly a pro in guitar.” Yn looked back up, adjusting her screen at the same time. “Thank you again, Hwa, I think I would’ve abandoned this project if it wasn’t for you.”

His nickname falling so effortlessly from her lips truly does things to him. It has his heart racing in a way he can get used to. Seonghwa looks away in an attempt to hide his odd-colored cheeks. He couldn't help but wonder if she actually noticed.

That’s the issue. He never knows what she does and doesn’t notice. He hopes she doesn’t notice that his eyes linger on her a beat longer than normally when she speaks and that his hands always want to reach out to help her, even through the screen.

“It’s really no problem, I’m just happy to help.” He replies back, cringing internally at his own voice.

She nods and taps something offscreen. “I’ll play the instrumental that I’ve come up with first and you can let me know what you think. Then when we’re writing, I’ll just play it acoustically, okay?”

“Okay!”

While K-Pop companies were known for their exceptionally bad connection during lives and stuff, he could hear and see her just fine. The honeyed melody of the untitled song plays trough the speaker of his phone, and he can't help but marvel in the fact that she’d feel comfortable enough to share something as intimate as a song with him.

She soon meets his eyes, excitement for his reaction twinkling in her own.

Seonghwa feels himself melting at the sight, the agreement with his friends now far in the back of his mind. The only thing on his mind now was her.

The song ends, snapping him out of his thoughts.

“So what did you think?” Yn asks shyly. It's not a common look on her. While she definitely isn’t the loudest in her group, she was never one to be shy like this. At least, not what he knew.

The need to dote on her until he’s sure that she knows how great her work is is pushed back down. He doesn’t want to weird her out but he does want to let her know.

Instead, he furrows his thick brows, deep in thought. “It’s very pretty, it feels like— how do I explain it… it feels like a summer sunset. Like how it feels to look at those pretty colors up in the clouds with someone you care about.

“It sounds optimistic!” He stops, eyes softening up as he finally realizes the word he’s looking for. “Romantic! …It sounds romantic.”

Yn claps in excitement at his comments. “That’s exactly what I was going for, I was watching this drama really cute drama when I came up with it.”

She strings the first few notes of the chorus. “Okay, let’s start!”

About an hour later, the pair works together like they have known nothing else for their whole lives. It just comes so easy to them.

Suddenly, Seonghwa hears a noise interrupting the peaceful atmosphere. He looks up from his notebook in surprise when he sees two of his younger friends stand at in front of his bedroom door, smiling while holding snacks.

Unsure of how to react, he gives the girl on the other side of the screen an apologetic smile. She heard the noise too and gives him back a curious look. Just as she’s about to ask, two figures have jumped on top of Seonghwa, toppling over his phone in the process.

San and Mingi scream greetings on the top of their lungs, so loud that Seonghwa worries that his neighbors are going to bring him noise complaints later. He just barely manages to utter out a few words from underneath them.

“Wait, phone— Yn!” He points in the general direction of phone.

“Yn?!” Mingi gets up quickly as he looks around for the fallen phone. When he grabs it, he’s met with the familiar face.

“Oh, hey, Mingi!” The sheer shock causes the bright-haired boy to lose his composure and drops it again.

As soon as San hears the voice he crawls off the bed to inspect himself, just barley in time to catch the device. Yn gets greeted by an open mouthed stare from him, making her laugh.

“And hello, San!”

“H-hi.” He replies quietly while Mingi freaks out, screaming without sound offscreen.

Seonghwa rolls his eyes at his friends' antics and snatches the phone out of San’s hand.

“I’m sorry about this, Yn, I had no idea they were coming over.” He explains apologetically.

After finally calming down Mingi’s sharp features come on the screen and covers his own face to also take a look at the girl.

“Hey Yn, how are you?” Mingi asks a little bit too loud for Seonghwa’s liking.

San copies Mingi’s actions, practically leaning over Seonghwa’s lap to get a glance. “Are you coming to Hanuelsan again soon?” He pouts.

“It’s okay, it’s a nice surprise.” Yn’s giggles don’t stop, warming all of the boys' hearts unintentionally. “Also, I’m good, thank you for asking Mingi. Hwa was helping me write lyrics. We just finished the chorus actually.

“And I’ll visit the cafe soon, San.” She promises. “What are you guys up to?”

Seonghwa nods furiously, trying to make sure he’s in frame too as he shoots an annoyed look at his friends. “No, really, why are you guys here? And how the hell did you even get inside?”

San smiles back, completely ignoring his hyung, his dimples showing as he does. “We were just bored so we decided to stop by.” He gives Seonghwa a quick shrug, the dreamy expression still on his face. “And we used a key, obviously.”

“How did they even get a key.” He mumbles to himself in confusion.

“Yunh—” San can’t finish his word before he gets cut off.

Suddenly Mingi stands up with an offended look on his face as a realization hits him. “You needed help with lyrics and you didn’t ask me? I’m literally a rapper.”

“I’m sorry, Princess, he offered.” Yn chuckles at his whining, while the other boys definitely don’t agree, it’s very cute to her. “I mean, you could help now if you want, since you’re there anyway. You too, San, the more the merrier!”

Both of the boys agree and after some squabbling, they are finally sat in a way that keeps all three of them pleased.

“So what’s the song called?” San asks as he reads over the neat notes Seonghwa took.

Yn thinks for a while but as she meets the eldest eyes an imaginary lightbulb goes off inside of her head. “I think I’ll call it Milky Way!”

Her hands find the guitar again as she plays the song for them, this time with part of the new lyrics.

Seonghwa doesn’t know if he’s supposed to feel proud or upset but he does know that the ugly green monster called jealousy is climbing in his chest as he watches the others. Deep in his heart, he knows he’s not the only one that carries these feelings for her.

An identical blush forms on their cheeks as they watch her lips move. Yn doesn’t know. She doesn't know that all three of them share the same thought as they look at her, the passion for music pouring out in the way she sings and the warmth she brings isn’t something that could be rivaled by the sun. They all know it.

Seonghwa, San, and Mingi also know for sure now that the situation they were in was a ticking time bomb, getting closer to explode every moment they spend with her.

If only she knew too.

‹ PREVIOUS ᜊ NEXT ›

NOTES. i love them i really do LIKE REALLY do but i’m sorry for the future guys </3 and the last pic is yn posting the audio file for milky way on her priv btw also next chapter will have a slight time skip

TAGLIST. @bunnystrm @seongwin @aestheticsluut @meginthebuilding27 @gaebestie @stopeatread @pr1ncessm1ng1 @persphonesorchid @se0nghwaswife @seonghwasslytherin @leeknowsnothing @alixnsuperstxr @bluehwale-main @miriamxsworld @tocupid @rieuvie @sunoo-bby @jcngh0-hq @dudufodd @nikisbf @mrowwww @end0rchans @qtdenks @mintgki @dear-dreamie @leo-seonghwa @legohwas @evilsailorsenshi @seonghwaddict @choichaeyiul @iw4milf @yunstarz @cvberidiot @tubatu-wari-wari @not2daym8 @jaehunnyy @brrrkdslek @whippedforbeomgyu @amara-mars @crvzy-fujoshi

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blissfullyecho · 1 year

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Do you have any tips on leveling up after a breakup? I'm heartbroken.... he cheated on me and is now FB/IG official with the girl today (we broke up yesterday) and it's almost like we never even dated for the few years we have. Now I want to level up BIG TIME

leveling up after a breakup where the loser broke your heart:

first and foremost, what a loser. i hate that you’re going through this because i wouldn’t even wish that on my worst enemy. but God has something better for you and maybe this had to happen so you CAN START your level up and get something much much better down the road. that’s what happened to me at least 🫶🏼

step 1: good riddance to him. it’s okay to cry and be angry, but do not be angry with yourself. don’t second guess what YOU did wrong and if YOU were the issue. he obviously has issues. delete, block, throw away anything and everything— physically and digitally that was his or was from him (unless they were nice gifts like diamonds and bags— you keep those lol). he wants to move on like you never existed? you do the same.

step 2: people either get 40% better or 40% worse after a breakup. don’t eat the tub of ice cream every night on your couch watching romance movies. make healthy decisions. treat yourself to whatever, but don’t go overboard. i did that with my ex and gained 30lbs and it made me feel more insecure.

step 3: indulge in level up content on all platforms. you may need the constant reminder to better yourself and i assume you’re on social media for the most part, so make social media work for you. this might make you feel better being reminded that you can be better than the girl he broke up/cheated on (you).

step 4: DO NOT DATE RIGHT NOW. you might feel lonely, you might want affection, i get it. we’ve all been there. but what’s going to happen is that the guys you date (if you date them too soon), will have you comparing them to the good things your ex once did. no guy is the same and you are going to feel worse because “these guys aren’t like him”. wait out on these guys for now until you are better than where you are now and i’m saying on a mental level.

step 5: re-evaluate your standards. what were the things you accepted from him that you didn’t really like but you let it slide? create a list of your “must haves” and “like to haves” for the guys you date in the future and stick to those standards.

step 6: learn to date yourself. create a list of things you’ve always wanted to do in the relationship but didn’t have the time to do it. maybe there were things you always wanted to do but you didn’t do them because he didn’t want you to. create that list and start getting to work. make yourself happy and SPOIL yourself with saying “yes” to everything you want to do.

step 7: do not stalk him or her. no checking their social media— even if it’s a year down the road. he’s in the trash bin. who cares what he’s doing. who cares what she’s doing. your standards have already increased. if you have to deactivate your socials for right now, do that. that’s what i had to do.

step 8: along with step 7, your TRUE friends and REAL family should not be giving you updates/tea on him or his life/relationship. that’s toxic and an immediate “no”.

step 9: work on yourself. find areas in your life that you want to improve on and start working on them each day. even if they are baby steps. if you continue your baby steps, eventually you’ll reach your goal.

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oharasluverboy · 8 months

Note

chubby reader x Miguel Drabble…??? Fluff or whateva, if ur comfy with ittt

Do not look away. — Miguel x chubby reader drabble…

(THANK YOU FOR THE SECOND REQUEST. don’t ever feel bad for requesting something like this! also sorry for the wait tumblr deleted my draft)

“how are you holding up?” miguel slouches to place a kiss on your cheek. tonight’s been a bit rough for you. your thoughts weren’t being as kind to you (as usual) today, miguel interrogated you over why you’ve been so quiet, and down today through text before you came clean. you didn’t hate your body, far from any means just..comparing yourself to others was a common thing you still had to unlearn. “..’m fine.” you replied, eyes focused on your mirror, staring at your reflection.

“you don’t sound fine.” he quipped back, pulling your back flush against his torso, his grip around you was firm but gentle, he didn’t want to crush you after all. peppering your cheek with a few more issues, “you know this wouldn’t happen so much if you stayed off your phone.” miguel commented, pulling a scoff from you along with an eye roll. “of course you’d say that.”

“you know i’m right. you always get in your head after being on your phone for too long, or worrying about how you look with other people..” he hummed, his eyes meeting yours through the reflection. “if you’re gonna try to lecture me i dont—“ a light pinch at your side caused you to jolt, “what the fu—?!”

“will you shut up for a minute.” miguel stated, not asked but stated. “you always focus on bad shit that is not needed, i can guarantee nobody cares. the only opinion that should matter is yours.” another kiss placed on your cheek, miguel’s hands feeling out your sides, miguel has been handsy for as long as you’ve called him yours, and he’s called you his. “if you keep worrying about stuff like this you will miss out, gorgeous.” his voice loud and clear, small kisses moving downward, from your cheek to your neck..

“we don’t have to go out if you don’t want to, we can stay home—i didn’t want to go to the get together to begin with..” miguel muttered, “but they invited us—“

“they’ll live if we don’t show up. we could go do something else, you know? you’re already all dolled up and pretty, would be a waste for you to stay inside.” his hands slowly turning you around, as they moved to cup your cheeks. “we could go have dinner, then go see a movie if you want? or we could go to that roller skating place you love..” the offer of doing something miguel wasn’t too fond of made you giggle, “didn’t you say you would kill yourself if you had to go back again?” you managed to get out, that smile fighting for its place on your face.

“if it makes you feel better then i’m willing to suffer through it..anything for you, beautiful.”

— authors note; IM SO MAD MY LAST ONE DELETED STILL UOU DONY UNDERATAND RAAHHH, but here’s the only surviving screenshot i had of it (i was getting my brother to beta read it), so take this as like..uhhhh a treat ig, okay bye bye

#miguel ohara #miguel ohara fluff #miguel ohara drabble #miguel x reader #miguel x you #oharasluverboy drabbles #i’m so mad my draft deleted y’all don’t understand almost went apeshit #miguel spiderverse #did not beta read whoops

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kerrikins · 1 year

Text

About Build & Poi's statements

I have so many thoughts and I think it will take awhile for me to sort through them and be able to put them down coherently on paper. I've felt a lot of emotions since January, perhaps the most I've ever felt in any fandom, ever. Shock, doubt, frustration, grief, rage, confusion, relief.

The statements have been posted at both Build and Poi's IGs and Twitter accounts, though I kind of assume that everyone has seen them by now. I have thoughts on what was in them and what they mean but for now I'm waiting for everything to be completely finalized.

In the meantime, though..

This applies to all sides when I say that the lines cutting through this fandom may as well be chasms at this point and I think that's horrendous and horrible in a lot of ways for a show brought to us by a company/cast of people who care about each other deeply. It's at the point where even within the various ships there are deep fractures and the literal insanity going on within ALL of the ships etc is downright disturbing. MA fans hating on BBB fans. M fans hating A fans and vice versa, and the same thing going on for BBB and Jeff & Code. Ghost shippers going to war with fans of actual pairings. All of it is nuts.

It's become clear to me that so much of the hate that's surfaced during Biu's case has been driven by what is, at its roots, shipping culture and wars among stans for the individual cast members. So much of it hasn't really been about feminism or victims at all, and yet it seems like there's so much silence about it or 'oh that's just Twitter' - it's not. I've seen it pretty much everywhere I've gone in the fandom, from Twitter to Reddit to here. And even if it is 'just Twitter' - there are still people behind those keyboards and the 'support' that's really just weird projections and using these men who are mostly incredibly kind and talented as fodder for hate and constant toxicity is... sad.

The last few months has really shaken me in terms of making me take a second look at how society and the internet have started reacting to cases of this nature. I said this earlier on twitter but I really feel like 'trust, but verify' has become 'trust and vilify' - and that is not okay. First, because it's wrong, and second because it is so incredibly detrimental to future cases like this due to the inevitable backlash.

I'm so incredibly disappointed at the lack of discussion that has existed on here, elsewhere on social media, and in the news since the initial blow up. From the phone call to the apologies to the incredibly concerning actions she took last week, none of it got the same level of coverage that the initial posts in January did and in my opinion there's a huge problem with that. Supporting victims should NOT mean 'well, we're just not going to discuss anything else that comes out'. There should be room for us to look at an issue from all angles and consider everything. There should be room for us to be able to speak up and ask questions without it being shut down as a lack of support or victim blaming. It shouldn't be wrong to just have a genuine *conversation*, and by that I mean conversation and not just poorly disguised passive aggressive jabs (and that goes for everyone).

There needs to be a true middle ground and I feel like we haven't found a way to balance that, yet. Not just the fandom or people on tumblr, but society in general.

I have more thoughts about how this entire case has gone, but those will wait.

For now I'm just relieved that we at least have this out of the way and can keep moving forward.

#build jakapan #kinnporsche: the series #kinnporsche cast

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my-castles-crumbling · 13 days

Note

hello cas, stellar anon. Ok so I’ve been waiting weeks for my parents to ask my brother, and my dad did it two days ago, he was whispering, but like he sucks at it, so I was listening basically my dad just asked if the friend was trying to be a girl, and if she asked the friend group to use she/her pronouns, and when it happened. My brother answered all of them, and then my dad asked if she was using a new name, my brother said yeah, she goes by x now, and then my dad asked how he felt about it, and he said idc. My dad then said, ok, you can talk to us abt this stuff and that was it. then my mom came downstairs and my dad relayed the conversation to her after my brother left the room.

I thought that was it, but my brother had his last band concert yesterday, and when me and my sister came home today she asked us if we knew x (she knew my brothers friend new name but she didn’t use it) was trying to become a girl. I said no, bc that seemed like the right thing to do (?) and then she was like , last night at the concert I looked at x’s (still deadnaming her) dad and I prayed, and I pray for our neighbors down the street who’s now y instead of x. These kids are looking for the answers in the wrong places, not just gender identity but drugs and alcohol, and she started crying and said, when I was younger, I acted like a boy, I smelled like one and looked like one, and these days people would’ve assumed I was trans, but I was a girl. (he’s apart of my brother’s friend group and my mom asked about him but my brother just said they weren’t close but they had the same friends) he wore a skirt to the concert, which my mom noticed during the award ceremony ig. He was wearing a white shirt with a suit and tie and jacket and he had like an ankle length skirt with a slit. He also had really long curly hair, like down to his waist, my mom mentioned something about him too but I don’t remember. I mean boys can wear skirts, but they could also be nonbinary or genderfluid or trans idk the right terms. But my brother said that his trans friend was part of a group of trans people and he was the token cis guy, so I assumed j was part of that group, since my brother said they only had the same friends. Idk.

I heard my mom praying this morning about that and about my cousin, who’s a lesbian, and she been married since 2020 and like in her current relationship for 8 years (I think). The issue is my mom isn’t that bad, when my cousin came out my aunt (her mom) said at like a church thing that her daughter being a lesbian was the worst thing that ever happened to her, while she was there. My mom’s side of the family is all refugees for the Vietnam war, and that aunt was like middle school age during that. My mom was invited to the cousin’s reception she didn’t go bc covid. Idk. long, sorry.

Hi!

I'm so sorry your family reacted like that. I just want to say again that I really admire you for realizing those values are wrong, you know? And I'm proud of your brother as well. I hope your family is treating you and your brother okay after all of that?

Sending love!

#ask #asks #ask cas #stellar anon

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sapphyreopal5 · 9 months

Text

My Experience at SPNNC 2023 Con

Hello, my name is Ellie. If you're not already familiar with my blog, I write a lot about things like my divination with tarot and a pendulum, the show Supernatural and the former cast, deities, various experiences of my own, dreams, etc. I went to the SPNNC 2023 aka CE Charcon 2023 as some here on Tumblr call it. I still don't know what the deal with the spatulas is at this con, I guess I wasn't one of the cool kids who was in the know about this "trend" per the usual ha ha.

Friday, Aug 18- Didn't go

Saturday, Aug 19

I arrived around 10:15am because I thought the line to register would be long and that it'd take ages to park. Nope, it took a couple minutes for me to find parking and the line to register empty. Someone told me however that on Saturday the line was over an hour long Friday. I guess that what they mean by priority registration for Thursday and Friday is that only people with weekend packages could register for the first hour and a half or so of registration on those 2 days, so they don't wait in line as long. I guess my not being able to make it on Friday was for good reason ha ha. In-between panels and photo-ops I went exploring the hotel, talked to some other people at the con, looked at the vendors tables, sometimes observed the actors and actresses interacting with each other or other fans.

11:30- Drake Rodger Photo-Op

I walked into this photo op and curiously my mind went quiet. For those who read my posts or know me personally, you know this NEVER happens. I almost always have many trains of thought happening at one time. A couple days before I went to this convention I was told by one of my guides Loki to buy a photo op ticket for Drake. I thought this was rather interesting but I decided okay let's do it. I saw Drake do the so called "Teletubby hole violation" when in line. I believe there were 3 people in line before me when I saw that. Pretty cooI stuff I got to see it in person, not gonna lie. I thought it was totally perfect ha ha. I'm afraid I didn't make the cut in that IG video as I didn't do a crazy pose. I will say however that as crazy as this might sound, I swear I thought he was going to pull me in closer but felt himself stop O.O When the photo was taken and therefore my photo op was done, he said "Thank you" in his soft spoken voice. Meg Donnelly his girlfriend was in the room and smiled at me as I walked off, which I thought was interesting to say the least. I walked out of this photo op a fan of his.

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2:30- Cosplay Costume Contest

I chose to dress as Hela from Thor: Ragnarok the Norse Goddess of Death for my costume. The winners were chosen based on whoever got the loudest cheers when the host stood behind them. I can see why not that many people chose to participate in this contest. A lot of the contestants wore the Castiel trench coat (not photographed here). The winner was "Pudding Dean" who got $150 and a certificate. Donna and Gabriel were the runner ups. I believe they got $75 and $25 along with the certificates. The rest of us got a red Supernatural lanyard for participating. Even though I did not win this contest, I am glad I was able to go onstage and not get stage fright while being asked my name and who I'm dressing up as let alone panic standing in front of that crowd. It shows to me I've grown a lot over the years and am overcoming some anxiety issues I have at times. Also, the fact I got plenty of compliments on my costume and even someone wanting a selfie with me because they loved my outfit so much made it all worth it even more in my opinion. By the way, I totally think Hela should've been a Supernatural character and could've made a GREAT villain or an anti hero, just saying...

4:50- Rich Speight Jr Photo-Op

Okay, being dressed as Hela from Thor: Ragnarok and taking a photo with Loki from Supernatural was at this point a given. I was nudged to buy a ticket while at the convention at this point. Naturally, a Loki nudge which totally makes sense ha ha. The Jared photo ops were running 20 min or so behind naturally, so therefore this photo op was running behind too. I ended up waiting by an empty security desk to charge my phone while waiting for the photo op to come up. I talked to a couple people while waiting but also where I was happened to be by where Meg, Drake and Jojo's autograph tables were set up (couldn't really see Jojo so much as his table was across the hall and not in a good line of sight where I was).

I ended up watching them over the course of most of my waiting time. Drake seemed pleasant while waiting around for autographs and such talking to the person he was sitting with. Jojo at one point threw a pen at him and Drake had to get up to get it off the floor. Meg barely spoke to the person she was with. At one point she started to tap her pen while looking around and not talking. When someone came up to her to say something she had that "friendly" voice she uses on stage and talking to fans. Talk about an awkward silence mostly between her and the person she was sitting with. I felt bad for Jojo and Drake because they clearly were hoping for more autographs and getting bored sitting there. After seeing Meg behave the way she did and having a tense tone with the person she was sitting with for the short bit they did talk, I did not feel so bad for her.

As for Rich, he seems like a really cool guy. I told him "yes" at first when he asked me if I made my costume and said he loves it. I ended up saying I'm just kidding I bought it online but "I thought you'd be happy to see me". He said "I am very happy to see you", dunno if he caught this Thor: Ragnarok reference or not when Hela said "I thought you'd be happy to see me" before she defeated the Asgardian Army. I certainly walked out of my photo op with him a fan of his.

youtube

9:00- Concert (Or should I say more like 9:30)

Nothing much to discuss here. I was aware many people were speculating that Jensen would sing on this night. Something kept telling me however that he was not going to sing but couldn't explain it. Mark Sheppard did show up to play the drums for apparently the first time since 2010 when he last played drums onstage. This is curious because it was his higher self who set me up coming to this convention to begin with. When Mark showed up, something told me "Jensen is not showing up to this concert because people were criticizing his looks online like crazy". A friend of mine had some similar feelings while this concert was going on. Of course, people must've been mindblown he didn't show up with how many were expecting him to show up but didn't ha ha. The microphones were very loud here, I walked out a little after 11pm when the concert was done with a headache.

Before Gold Panel/Before I went back to Convention

The same friend of mine who had the same feelings I did about why Jensen didn't show up to the concert dreamwalked to the very same room Jensen and Jared were in. Virtually EVERYTHING they talked about when she dreamwalked (mind you, for the first time ever!) to them manifested in the Gold Panel. I didn't get to go to this panel because I only had the copper package. Jensen said things to Jared like [I'm only paraphrasing in this section mind you] "do people actually want to meet me or do they only care about my looks?", mentioned how upset he was people were making fun of his mustache this weekend, and Jared at one point said "no matter what people are saying about you, you're an awesome person. I want you to know that". Jared even made a strange remark about how "Gen asked me to babysit the kids a couple weeks ago". Around 10:20am before I left for the convention, I picked up my pendulum and said to Hermes "Is there any truth to this dream my friend had?" and he said "Yes, LOTS of it".

Turns out, in this particular panel someone asked them if they ever experienced bullying and their children (around the 6:05 mark). Around 14:10, Jensen also brought up how his daughter said "it's not babysitting" when Jensen is with his kids. "She's just mom and he's just dad". Hmmm, were Poseidon and Hermes telling them both the night before or so what kinds of things they will be asked during the panels? Very interesting dreamwalking experience, let alone the fact everything she heard ended up manifesting the next day at the Gold Panel (and that Hermes said there's lots of truth to her dream with me curiously asking him this 10 or so min before the panel was scheduled to start at 10:30).

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Sun, Aug 20

I came back to the convention around 11:15 or so. I mostly hung around the vendors area and explored the hotel and talked to some people before I went to the Mark Sheppard panel.

1:15- Mark Sheppard Panel

Mark's panel was an absolute joy for me to be in the room for. He said things like "if you have a panic attack this is the safest place you can be", "who wants to be king of a country", and asking someone "is that the best you can do" when they started to ask him "if you could be any animal [what would it be and why]?" and cut them off saying "oh Jesus". It was 100% worth going to this convention to sit in this panel. Mark's authentic, sarcastic, and speaks his mind but also has a very caring heart despite having a tough love approach at times. I enjoyed his walking around the theater for his panel instead of sitting up there like others do. At one point he was walking through the row 3 rows in front of mine when he was looking at someone's Moose doll, which I thought was pretty cool. Very close!

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J2 Main Panel

No, I didn't get to go to the Gold Panel because I only had a copper package. It's interesting because I felt my lie detector alarm go off many times when Jensen was speaking in this panel. It was hard to hear some of what was being said at times during this panel because I wasn't exactly front row and did tune out some here and there. Jensen I believe is trying very hard to keep up with a happy family life at home. His passive aggressive tone speaking about Danneel was very apparent at least to me. The car story? Jensen please hun, you should've just driven with her. I know you were aggravated about the car problems but that doesn't mean behave this way. It does show a very concerning mindset that Hermes spoke of that he's in right now. Those who are not seeing it at this point do not have their eyes or hearts open to receiving this information...

I found his answer about reading a book he'd like to revisit to be very off putting. I myself had reading struggles as a kid and essentially taught myself how to read when I was going to enter 5th grade (long story here). He did an absolutely terrible job talking about his dislike of reading here. Don't like to read? Fine but the way he used a book his wife reads a lot, come on! You never read 1 book in your life Jensen? Sheesh...Someone was kind enough to point out to me that when Jensen was speaking of the book Danneel reads that's by her when she sleeps, she says "HER bed" not "THE bed" around the 40:35 mark (put some earbuds or headphones in and you'll hear it). Jared was a great pleasure to be in the same room as. I feel that Jensen also would've been more pleasant if he was not on the downward spiral he seems to be very much on lately.

I've spoken a lot about Jensen and Jared and others in past posts regarding divination and deities and other topics. Poseidon and Hermes both used Jared and Jensen to speak through them. Just about everything that was said in this panel they have talked about many times to me recently. I expected many of the things that were discussed to be discussed, very few surprises. Heck, even the ridiculous questions that made it through weren't totally surprising on a divine blueprints level. Jensen very much needs guidance, as Hermes has told me plenty of times before and I could see it in his eyes.

Some of the things I knew about them I discussed with only a few via PM and even they were surprised at some of the things that came about in this panel vs what I told them. I will say this, I was not surprised by the house purchase Jensen made in CT based on things I do know, nor was I surprised at Jared talking about how as he gets older he is becoming less able to tolerate 100 plus degree weather for a month at a time. Him talking about liking the mountains, NC even and Asheville and such was interesting and mentioning Idaho (when Gen made a trip there with their kids no more than a couple weeks beforehand).

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I went home after this panel was done. There was at one point a golden sticker on someone's chair behind another sticker and the prize was apparently a gold ticket to another con. Of course... the winner was in a gold seat NATURALLY. Quite annoying but I know enough about Creation Entertainment to know this was 100% to be expected. Would I go again? Absolutely. It was a joy being in the room for all these panels, meeting the actors and fans I did, and being able to say I actually went to one of these things.

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