I've been thinking about me, my daily routine, my inner emotions and everything in my life, I realized that the only thing I've been doing constantly is forcing myself to live, everyday I survive waiting for the present day to end and then another day to come and end again, like I'm just waiting for the time to pass as if eventually something will happen, I wait, I endure, I say to myself "nothing left, you'll end this soon". My whole life is waiting for the moments to end because its tiring and difficult, I never experience the joy of walking up and getting excited to try something new or to learn something I like or to do a task that I'm passionate about. I'm scared of continuing to live this way, I'm actually terrified of the thought that I'm wasting my youth and my efforts being anxious, stressful and empty.

I just wonder how does it feel to live a life with passion and excitement ? How does it feel to walk up with energy to work and interact the whole day ? How does it feel not paying attention to the time because your in love with what your doing and you don't want it to end ?

I think I live because I have to. My heart longs to go somewhere else.

asking and receiving (bonus below readmore)

[ID: A black and white, digital Trigun comic of Vash and Wolfwood. In the first panel is a close up of Wolfwood's mouth as he says, "Vash". Accompanying it is a close up shot of Vash's eye, widen and cheeks flushed. Wolfwood presses a knee against the open space between Vash's legs and says, "Tell me everything you want from me." Wolfwood's face is equally as flushed. He continues to say, "I'll give it to you. Everything." As he talks, a wide shot shows the both of them in white space. Vash is sitting, leaning a little back with both hands pressed against the surface he's sitting on. Wolfwood is in his white dress shirt, stripped of the blazer. He's still leaning in with one knee in between Vash's spread legs, his right hand touching Vash's lips and his left hand behind his back.

The shot closes in on Vash's mouth and Wolfwood's hand against it, pressing down on the lower lip as he says, "You have to ask though. Go on." His hand moves down to Vash's chin, gently holding it. With a shy and uncertain expression, Vash hesitantly asks, "Um... K... Kiss... Please?" Wolfwood, without wasting a second, leans in and kisses him and indulges by pressing deeper, eliciting a small noise of surprise from Vash.

Wolfwood moves away from Vash first and with a smile, asks, "What else?" Vash tugs on Wolfwood's left sleeve, wordlessly budging Wolfwood to give him his hand that was still behind his back. In the next panel, Vash utters, "Hold me..?" He's holding Wolfwood's left hand with his own while his right hand is reaching for his waist. Wolfwood complies, moving his left hand to Vash's shoulder and his right hand continues to touch Vash's cheek. Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"

More comfortable now, Vash leans in to kiss Wolfwood. Wolfwood catches him immediately, pressing his thumb against Vash's lips to stop him before demanding, "Hey. Ask." Vash looks back in surprise and Wolfwood meets his eye with a quiet, insistent look. They're quiet for a moment before Vash leans in again and curtly requests, "Kiss. Me." Wolfwood says "Good", smiling as he lifts his hand away, and meets Vash's lips. In the next shot, Wolfwood had adjusted his position, sitting on Vash's thigh. The hand that was once on Vash's cheek has moved its way to Vash's nape, pushing away the collar of his jacket with his pinky. His other hand continues to grip on Vash's shoulder. Still kissing, Wolfwood asks again, "What else?"

In the next shot, Vash is starting to turn, moving Wolfwood with him. Vash asks, "Let me on top of you?" Wolfwood says, "Mhm" before asking again, "What else?" The next panel shows a close look of Vash's face. He's looking down, flushed and shy just as he had been at the beginning, but now, more decisive. Vash asks, "Wolfwood... Let me have you..?" A panel of Wolfwood taking Vash's hand into his, pulling it towards his chest. The next panel shows Wolfwood lying down where Vash had laid him. Vash's hand is on Wolfwood's chest, covering the cross of his rosary while Wolfwood's hand lingers against his, loosely pressing Vash's hand in place. He looks up at Vash with a shy smile of his own, flushed cheeks. He says, "All yours."

A panel shows a close up of Vash's tender gaze before he leans down to be closer to Wolfwood. The final shot is a front view of their positions, Vash's face turned away from the viewer; Vash is leaning over Wolfwood who's lying down with his right leg draped over Vash's legs. Wolfwood's left hand holds onto Vash's left arm. With finality, Vash says, "...Mine." End ID]

[ID: A follow up bonus comic in a looser, sketchier style. They're laying comfortably in bed when Vash asks, "What was that earlier?" referecing to the start of the previous comic. Wolfwood glances away and says, "To get you used to it. Asking. And getting what you ask for. Since you're alwasy hesitant about it." Vash's eyes widen, tight lipped. Wolfwood continues, "Knowing you, it'll be a tough habit to break..." When he says this, Vash can't help but laugh, unable to deny it. Wolfwood slowly brings a hand to Vash's cheek and continues to say, "So I'll keep trying -- whatever ways I can... to get it through your thick skull." Vash takes Wolfwood's hand with his, kissing the the palm gently. Wolfwood's eyes soften and holding onto Vash's cheek, he leans in to try for a kiss. Vash says, "Hey..." before stopping Wolfwood's lips with the back of his hand, a smug look on his face, "Ask." Wolfwood's embarrassed and with little irritation, asks, "Really?" Vash smiles, saying, "You're in need of practice too." They pause for a moment, Wolfwood looking contemplatively, before he's leaning in again, asking, "May I please kiss you?" Vash looks him in the eyes and says, "Yes." The comic ends with a "chu", indicating an off-panel kiss. End ID]

wilson saying “I need to do this. for you.” is fucking insane actually. in the same episode where house is deciding whether or not he should commit suicide as a result of wilson’s dying. They are each other’s lines between life and death. humans have a biological instinct to preserve their survival at all costs; house has an addiction that governs his life. but they were willing to forgo all of it for one another, because they couldn’t fathom it being any other way. IM SICK

honestly one of the biggest questions i had in regards to vice housewarden deuce was: so is the hat a vice thing or a trey thing?

and once again consulting my lil circle of friends, i landed on it actually being a cater thing. trey’s whole thing is that he doesn’t like to stand out or be noticed so i thought it was funny that he just walked around with a hat when no one else did. the thought was cater was who suggested trey wore a hat so people could tell he’s was vice, trey objected, but in the very few bets trey has ever lost against cater he winds up wearing the hat.

deuce continues the legacy, believing the hat was just part of the uniform. he doesn’t realize this isn’t the case until the seniors drop back around when the sdc is back and trey has to break it to him. at that point tho, it’s already become a thing, and deuce continues to wear the hat.

that aside, the way deuce became vice was pretty simple. ace asked him to. in regular ace fashion though, he went: well, who ELSE was i gonna ask? it’s not like i gotta lotta options.

but we all know that even if he did, deuce would’ve been his choice anyway.

i mentioned in the tags of the previous post that deuce is constantly on ace’s ass over his housewarden duties— but unlike ruggie and jamil who ran around doing everything for their housewardens— deuce simply enforces. deuce holds him accountable. and this is generally what deuce does in the grand scheme of the dorm as well.

when ace gives an order, deuce ensures this is carried out and he’s rather good at it. it’s something i wanna explore more during his sophomore year as by the time he’s a junior i feel deuce is far more at peace with who he is and how he uses his past experiences, but because deuce is far more empathetic and willing to be more open with others, dorm members find themselves listening to deuce more than they do ace. (i have a trio of triplet ocs who only exclusively listen to deuce, even when riddle was still around, and it’s because deuce had come to accept his hotbloodedness and learned how to use it to connect with others.)

deuce is aware he doesn’t have the sharp wit ace does or the commanding presence riddle did, but his interpersonal skills are leagues beyond.

he’s more at ease with letting his more passionate side come out when he needs to put his foot down and he’s a fantastic motivator. while he might be second in command, i like the idea of junior year really honing his leadership skills that he eventually takes with him when he sets his sights on the arcane response unit. you can pry high ranking a.r.u officer!deuce from my cold dead hands :)

gently tagging @mundaneasphyxia since you asked so nicely lel this wasn’t going to be a subject i dwelled much on as it’s kinda just part of hashing out timelines for my ships and stuff but like hey if anyone else wants to ask bout anything they’re curious about regarding this go right ahead i guess

Vincent Price as Dr. Frankenstein

The Danny Kaye Show - aired 1965

thinking about flowers’ petal (that came right of blue’s mind via cabeswater) being compared to kisses and they landed right on gansey’s mouth meanwhile the petals avoided adam and landed all around him :/ also adam watching the petals fall bc he’s an eternal observer :/

I think the Knight of Dawn being "a coward who is unable to stand up for what is right and does as he's ordered to" and "someone who cares deeply about his family and did everything he could so that Silver could live a happy and normal life in the future" are two statements that can coexist.

Hey here's an angle on the Jiang family dynamic and its impact on Wei Wuxian that I haven't seen discussed:

Wei Wuxian grew up seeing Jiang Yanli routinely having her agency cut off and denied in both large (betrothal) and small ways. That were largely tied up in her gender, sure, but this was also a family containing Yu Ziyuan. A daughter in this household had every chance of having her gender treated as of secondary importance.

She just had to earn it.

The way Jiang Yanli was hemmed in and her potential as an independent actor dismissed was at least as strongly correlated with her failure to be a powerful sword cultivator.

So Wei Wuxian's total refusal to let anyone know that he'd lost access to his cultivation and his violent reactivity against being diminished or condescended to during his Sunshot-to-death period, when before he was pretty immune to being looked down on, could have a lot to do with having been presented with this clearly labeled diagram of how your personhood gets stripped away when you are, by the standards of your society, disabled.

Hey do you ever think about Orym being a self proclaimed romantic who is “super lonely all the time, especially at night” and how guilty he feels about wanting romantic connection because he still loves his husband, and sees Will’s face every night before going to bed, but he’s starting to realize his deeper attraction to Ashton as something real and realize his pining for Dorian as something he shouldn’t ignore, but he was supposed to be with Will and he’s come to terms with Will dying, but sometimes it hurts so much, and yes he wants romantic connection and he’s so lonely, but he still hasn’t gotten revenge for Will’s death, and he may die soon so why pursue anything if he’s gonna be with Will again in the afterlife, BUT he may die soon and why hold off on admitting how he feels when he knows that despite losing Will the time they had was real good and he wouldn’t trade it for anything, and what if he doesn’t die what if it all turns out okay and maybe he now really has a reason to want and hope for not just *the* future, but HIS future because that future could include Dorian or Ashton and is it bad to not want to be with Will sooner or is it better to want to live and be with someone who cares for him because thats what Will would want and he wants romantic connection and he is so lonely all the time, especially at night, and what if I started chewing the drywall huh?

Forever bummed by how boring demon fights are..... They're constantly present in the lore/story as a threat and being dangerous because they target you mentally is their Whole Thing, and well. That's kinda hard to implement into an arpg combat system ig. But it still bugs me that demons are barely more than any other random mob encounter.... Wished they'd at least idk, grant negative status effects? Maybe a sloth demon slows you down, or a pride demon prevents healing, or a fear demon reduces hit chance...... Or something. Or at least don't put them into every other sidequest.

“but when i think of you, i want to be alone together. i want to strive against and for. i want to live in contact. i want to be a context for you, and you for me.

i love you, and i love you, and i want to find out what that means together.”

— amal el-mohtar

I would have end my life if I had the choice

"Supreme Justice, would your neutrality really waver over just a cup of tea?"

never quite the same again.

Alien: what are human’s instinctive reactions to danger?

Human 1: fight or flight!

Human 2, deadpan: run, hit, talk shit

Alien:

Please don't become desensitized about Palestine. People are giving us their last words, begging that if they get wiped out we spread the word about them to future generations. Please don't let that happen and do not take neutral stand about it. Neutral is as good as supporting the genocide.

Please continue on supporting Palestine and their people, remember that they are not numbers or another statistic. They are people. People who have dreams, desires, families, lovers, children, pets, hobbies, favorite food, shows, colors, something to look forward to and something to live for. They have a life - just like all of us. This is not just a tragedy, this is something we can help to prevent from happening more and taking even more lives.

One difference in number is one whole life coming to an end. It could be a life of a baby, a child, a man, a woman, a person who should have the right to experience life. It's a person who is someone's family, sister, brother, father, mother, wife, husband, grandparent, lover, friend. Please do not become desensitized. Please be angry, be sad, be hopeful for them. Just don't give up or turn the blind eye because you think there is nothing you can do. Sharing the word means so much, they don't have a voice right now. They didn't have a proper voice for years, so please, be their voice. It's not "just another war", it's a genocide.

People are taking their last breath as I type this. It's sad. It's awful to think about, but please think about it. Remember it. Don't choose silence because it's more convenient.

Be aware of who you support. These are people/celebrities who support Israel.

What can you do besides reading news about Gaza

Another link that you can use to educate yourself

If you want to see videos & photos of Palestine and the people as well as what's happening to them

I reblogged these, but more links for education, donations, etc. in case you didn't see!! -> here :) and here :)

a whole generation !!!!!!!!!!!! let that sink in and don't brush over it.

19 years old !!!!!!!!!!!

just imagine having to accept that your life is FORCEFULLY coming to an end by an exterior force and there is nothing you can do about it. You have no choice, but to hope that others will get free and live a life you couldn't. To be helpless, fearful, tortured and killed. Be their voice, support them, please.

again!!! please unfollow me/block me and don't interact with me if you support Israel.