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writingthingsisdifficult · 3 years

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Feeling alone on your birthday? Check. Drinking too much to hide those feelings? Check. Accidentally both yelling at and declaring your feelings for Mando? Check. Oops.

Din Djarin x female reader

It was my birthday a couple of weeks ago, and the day wasn’t optimal, so this little idea formed. I'd be super stoked if you let me know what you think. :)

Word count: 5043

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It was your birthday. A day for eating and drinking and celebrating with friends and family, but you had neither. Still, the day had been okay, you supposed, but you couldn't shake off the loneliness and sadness that accompanied it. When you were younger, you always looked forward to the day, and even during the war your parents managed to scrounge up a celebration of sorts.

But that was years ago. Now your friends were gone, your parents were gone, hell, even your home planet was gone, and your birthday served only as a bittersweet reminder, reduced to longing, heartache, and waiting for the inevitable end.

The music was loud enough that it drowned out the other patrons in the bar, allowing you to drink and wallow in self-pity in peace, just like you had planned, and you were deep enough in the bottle that the mental wall that protected your emotions started crumbling.

Being miserable at home was bad enough, and you were seriously starting to regret the decision to even go outside today. Somehow the loneliness punched you in the head once the third glass was empty and you noticed how crowded the bar was. No one else seemed to be alone.

Your circle of friends had never been large, and it became even smaller during the war. Then it slowly thinned as people got older; getting jobs in transport, or starting families. Some just moved away. Eventually it became harder to keep in touch. Life. Life was what happened.

You sniffed into your glass, coughing a little when the fumes hit the back of your nose. There was still one friend, though. But he wasn't in town at the moment. He wasn't even on the planet.

Yeah, the music was loud, but not loud enough to drown out the thoughts that popped into your head. You had sort of promised yourself that you wouldn't think about Mando tonight, but as with all such promises, Brain was a big, fat liar.

As the hours ticked by, his face, well, helmet, showed up in your mind over and over, no matter how many times you shoved him down. Then his voice echoed in your ears; that soft, yet commanding voice that sent shivers down your spine. And his laugh… quiet sometimes, but always sincere. Fuck, you missed him so much! A new lump caught in your throat, and you swallowed hard and traced a line through the condensation on your glass.

How long had it been? He left right before your last birthday, you knew he had a job to do, but he promised to come visit again when he had earned enough money to take a break.

Weeks turned to months. Nothing unusual there, but when the year mark approached, you grew worried. You were always worried, to be honest, considering his line of work, but he had never been gone this long without so much as a message before.

"Well, happy birthday to me," you muttered with a sigh and drained the glass, wincing as the liquid burned down your throat, but the numbness that followed spread over you like a blanket. “Hey Briswig!” You waved your glass in his general direction. “Help me out, will ya?”

The bartender put down his towel, picked up a bottle. and sauntered over to you. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?” He asked and poured a generous amount into your glass.

Shaking your head vigorously, you almost fell off the stool. “Nooooo! Not enough, I think you mean.”

Briswig smiled, then shook his head. “I can barely understand what you’re saying. It’s too early to be this wasted, Y/N. Shouldn’t you be at work or something? Why are you even here?”

“Din’t you know? ‘S my birthday.”

"It is? Happy birthday!" He cocked his head a bit and frowned. "You've been drinking alone all day." It was innocent enough, but it stung more than you wanted to admit.

You wafted him away and grimaced. "So? Not everybody is a social champ. Took the day off to drown my sorrows. See?" Lifting the glass again, you saluted him and took a big gulp. Most of the liquid went down the wrong pipe, and you coughed hard. The alcohol stung in your nose.

Handing you a napkin, Briswig patted your arm. “You don’t have to drink alone, you know.”

Rolling your eyes, you emptied the rest of the glass in one go and used the sleeve of your jacket to wipe your mouth. “Well, I would if I had any friends. All my friends are dead.” Or not even on the planet, you added in your head. “Do you know how hard it is to make new friends when you’re an adult? And I’m not very good at it in the first place.”

Briswig grimaced. “Go home, Y/N. You’ve had more than enough. Go home and sleep. You’ll thank me in the morning.”

You answered with a small pout. “Are you kicking me out? On my birthday?”

He smiled and left the bar to collect glasses. “You know what? Yes, yes I am. It’s not healthy wallowing like you do right now. Take an early night, get the day over with faster, right? Go home. Or do I have to call the bouncer on you?”

Glancing over at the burly trandoshan by the door, you sighed in defeat and hopped off the stool, almost knocking it over and bumping into the bartender. "Yeah, yeah. I'm going." You blew a raspberry and waved dismissively at him.

He chuckled and stepped aside so you could pass safely. You still stumbled. "You'll feel better tomorrow," he repeated, way too cheerfully for your taste.

"Bah!"

"See you next week, Y/N."

"Screw you!" And you meant it. He had come between you and your alcohol. For all you cared he could jump into a sarlacc-pit.

"I know you love me."

"Only because you provide me with my preferred poison, Briswig."

"Sleep tight."

The afternoon breeze was pleasant. It was still early enough in the year that the temperatures were tolerable, and the summer humidity hadn't kicked in just yet.

You sighed and snorted at the same time. How dared the day be so likeable? One day, you thought, you would jump on board one of those spaceships, travel the universe, find the one responsible for it all, and then punch them in the face. Or yell at them. Or at least hand them a strongly worded letter. You had never been fond of confrontations.

The sudden rush of air from the door pushed you forward, forcing you to sidestep. A stroke of luck and unexpected reflexes stopped your face from impacting with the wall, though your hands stung from the scrapes on you palm.

"Oh. Heh. Sorry. Din't see y' there." The words stumbled out of your mouth, and you looked at the wall in front of you and trying to make sense of it. "Well, don't let me interrupt." You patted the red brick and turned the other way, only to smack your head on a shiny breastplate. "'Pologies. Nice armour." You thought for a second. "I knew an armour once. He was nice too." You closed your eyes and pictured Mando in your mind. "I'd kick his butt," you muttered with a scowl, "if I could just catch him. Give him a few choice words for leaving me alone, that fucker. You understand, don't you?"

The armour started to say something, but you cut it off.

"He better come back soon." You fought to focus. It was harder than you anticipated. You weren't that drunk, were you? Or at least, you hadn't been when you'd been seated at the bar. Seated. Oh. "Now, where was I? Oh, yeah, don't suppose you've seen a Mandalorian sneaking around? I, I don't mean jus' any Mandalorian, you know." The eyes looking back at you from the shiny armour-mirror-thing glittered as you tapped the hard surface. "I mean my Mandalorian."

The armour didn't respond.

"You'd like him," you continued, not noticing the way the helmet tilted when you spoke, or how it chuckled when you interrupted every time they tried to speak. "He’s kind and funny and so soft on the inside -“ Putting a finger to your lips, you smiled conspiratorially. “Shhh… don’t tell ‘im that I said that. He likes people to think he’s hard.” The smile turned dopey. “He is hard. Could probably take anyone in a fight. He’s a total badass. Ooh, his ass. That’s a fine ass.”

"My Mandalorian is fantabulous," you said, grinning to hide the lump in your throat. If the waterworks started now, you wouldn't have the sober strength to stop. "Absolutely marvelsome. And he always makes me smile, you know. He’s perfect. I hate him. Makes me feel like I can fly."

A loud sigh escaped you, and you blinked one eye at the time. "Damn that man. Off on his adventures and leaving me behind like that. Look at this place. It's a dump! If I could, I'd jump on a spaceship and never ever come back." The thought of Mando stung in your heart. "I love him, y'know," you muttered to the breastplate. "Stupid Mando with his stupid, shiny armour." You hiccoughed a sob and swallowed. "I miss 'im." Blinking again, you stepped sideways to let the stranger pass, and almost stumbled into a trash bin. "Well, it's nice to meet you, armour."

"Y/N…" The voice showed a mix of amusement and something else you definitely were too drunk to recognise.

But hearing your own name immediately shut you up. For a moment the voice was just a disembodied memory, so familiar, but you just couldn't figure it out. Slowly, you looked around, before finally lifting your eyes. "Mando!" A wide smile spread over your face. "Where did you come from? I didn't see you, there."

It was difficult to decipher him, what with the armour and all, and even more so now you had all but inhaled Briswig's entire collection of fine, fine alcohol, but he looked happy to see you. You hoped he looked happy to see you.

Taking his gloved hand, using it to pull yourself closer, you finally put your arms around him, snuggling his hard shell, though in your state it didn't feel hard at all.

"I missed you," you mumbled into his pauldron, the sound of your voice somewhat muffled by the metal.

He squeezed you tight with one arm, leaning his head against yours. "Yeah, me too."

Forcing yourself to let go, you still lingered with your hand on his arm. "Hm? Shall we go for a walk? The suns don't set for a while yet. Or better: do you have anything to drink?"

"You think you should have any more now?" he asked as you crashed into the bin again. The only reason you didn't tumble over it and land on your butt was because he still held onto you.

"Yeah! Duh!"

He shook his head. "Let’s get you to bed.”

“But the suns are still up.” Confusion fizzed in your head. It was too early to sleep.

“I know, but I think you need some rest. We can talk tomorrow.”

“Are you sure?” You pulled back a little bit.

"Positive," Mando said, offering his arm as support. "You're so drunk you can barely stand. Can't have you starting a fight with the wall."

"What? Why? What did it say about me?" You balled your fist, tugging out of his grip to punch the bricks.

"Don't worry about it." He laughed quietly. "Come on." He took you gently by the elbow, leading you through the streets, making sure you wouldn’t fall and hurt yourself. Based on the collision with the trash can, there were already bruises forming on your thighs.

Being next to Mando was the only thing that made the day tolerable. You cherished the touch of his hand on your elbow, grinning stupidly, not quite aware of your surroundings, but still awake enough that you could account for yourself, and try to keep a conversation. Leaning heavily on him, you snuggled into his side. You could stay like this forever. “Mando. My Mando,” you muttered with a stupid grin. It wasn’t strictly true, but you were too drunk to care.

“Din. My name is Din,” he replied quietly.

You stopped abruptly. "Whoa!" It took a few seconds for your brain to unscramble. “Your name is Din.” Pause. You hiccoughed. “‘S pretty.”

“Thanks, I guess,” Din answered.

You took his arm again, an extra sway in your step. “Din. My Din,” you muttered, clearly trying to be quiet enough that he didn’t hear it. He did.

Though the ship no longer held the same feeling of home for Din - kriff, he missed the Crest - it was closer than the flat you called home. To be honest he wasn’t even sure if you even lived there anymore, and you weren’t providing answers; mumbling and humming happily. You were a happy drunk. Din smiled under his helmet. He should have come back long ago and whisked you away.

To be honest, he didn’t catch more than half of what you said, you were too intoxicated to make much sense, and most came out as gibberish anyway. But he DID catch the part where you said you missed him, and you had mumbled something about his stupid armour and his stupid butt, and he couldn’t ignore the feeling of elation that coursed through him.

Had you been sober, well, more sober, he would’ve told you how he felt, but for now he was more concerned with keeping you safe. There would be a day tomorrow too.

The ramp creaked and clanked heavily when it hit the ground.

“Wait, wait, wait,” you protested once you processed the sight, squinting at the entrance. “This isn’t the Crest?”

Din shook his head and looked at the new ship. It was shinier, newer, probably better, but it didn’t have the personality. “I lost it,” he replied bitterly. He still felt that pang of sadness every time the old ship was mentioned. “I haven’t decided if I’m going to keep this one yet.”

You patted the dusty exterior and nodded. “You should. Feels sturdy, ummm, keep you safe.”

He smiled a half smile. You seemed to approve. Maybe he could get used to the new ship after all.

“You can sleep in here,” he said, pointing with his free arm to a narrow alcove when you had made your way through the ship and into the private quarters.

“Noooo…” you sing-song protested. “It’s still light. An’m not tired.”

“Say that to your droopy eyelids,” he retorted. “And it’s dark in here; who cares what it’s like outside anyway.”

He had a point. And you were tired. Almost immediately, once you admitted that fact to yourself, you started swaying. Din had to grip you tighter to keep you from falling nose first to the floor. It was so hard to stay awake, even though you fought with all you had. The yawn that followed almost split your face in two. “Mmmm…”

“At least wait until you’re lying down,” Din grunted, thrown a bit off-kilter by your sudden deadweight. He hoisted you up to get a better grip so he could guide you to the bed. It was more dragging than walking, since you had apparently decided to sleep standing up.

“Come on, my drunk one. Let’s get you into bed, alright?” The only answer he got was a quiet, drawn-out hum that he interpreted as a yes, more out of necessity than anything else.

He lowered you down on the edge of the small sleeping alcove, and you sat - for a whole three seconds, before flopping backwards, landing with your head in the middle of the mattress and your legs still on the floor. Moments later you were snoring lightly.

Din looked at you with a gentle smile on his lips. You looked serene, like a sleeping angel, but that crooked angle of your neck couldn’t be comfortable. He’d fallen asleep many awkward places when he needed to, but waking up was always a stiff and painful experience.

So he grabbed your legs and tried to slide you onto the bed. No good. Your body twisted like a noodle. “Dank farrik! A little cooperation would be good,” he muttered, warranting a small sigh of content from you, almost making him forget what he was doing.

“Right. So…” He shook himself and cleared his throat. This was going to be more difficult than he thought.

Reaching over you, he hooked his arms under yours and pulled. Lacking the leverage, he slipped and almost landed on top of you, only just managing to get a hand loose in time to catch himself, and smacking his head on the wall in the process. The sound reverberated in his helmet, and the fact that you didn’t even react made him a bit worried. He would definitely have to check on you during the night.

What now? There was only one possibility left, and the thought sent heat to the back of his neck. The first attempt was fruitless. His helmet scraped against the low ceiling, and the bulkiness of his armour restricted his movement too much. With a jolt to his stomach, he realised that he would have to remove it. Was he ready for that? Maybe. After all, you were sleeping, and - if things went the way he had planned, he would soon show you his face anyway. But it was a big step. He thought for a second; one that he was willing to take for the sake of your comfort.

Returning to a dark corner, he began unfastening the clasps that fixed his breastplate in place. Then his arms and legs. Only when all the other armour were gone, leaving him feeling bare and vulnerable, he lifted his helmet off and placed it in one of the small wall niches. It fit perfectly.

Inhaling deeply, then exhaling, he stepped into the light again. You were still sleeping, and seeing you with his own eyes instead of through the visor almost brought him to his knees. He knew then, that unless you told him to, he would never have the strength to leave you again.

Suddenly he was struck by guilt. Could he really offer to take you away, to remove you from the safety and calm of having your own place? Wouldn’t he be ripping your roots right from the soil? A life on board the ship, with him, would be no easy life.

But hadn’t you, in your drunkenness, told him that this planet felt more like a prison than a home? The Crest had been his home once. Maybe, with you at his side, this ship could become home too.

Din gently climbed into the alcove, positioning himself with his knees on either side of your hips, careful to not touch you more than necessary. This way he had enough room, and enough strength to pull your drunken body all the way in.

Satisfied that you weren’t lying crooked anymore, he scooted out and off the bed. He then pulled off your boots and tucked the blanket securely around you.

With a sudden ache in his heart, he was reminded of Grogu, but quickly told himself that leaving the kid with the Jedi was for the best. Still, he was going to make damn sure he didn’t lose you too. With a final pat on your knee, he switched off the light and left you to sleep.

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Some mudhorn was stomping on your head when you woke up. "Hnnnggg… I’m definitely dying. And if not, someone better hurry up and make it happen!” You weren’t ready to get out of bed yet, but it wasn’t a very comfortable position, and your tongue felt drier than the sand dunes on Tatooine. You muttered a curse and tried to turn over on your side, only to face the wall too quickly. You cursed your inexplicable ability to curl up in the smallest of corners in your sleep. Slowly, ignoring the creaking joints, you unfurled and stretched.

"Hey,” a gentle voice said from somewhere up above you.

Okay, so you weren't alone. That was… unusual. You opened your eyes and almost choked on your tongue.

Mando was there. “Good morning,” he said softly.

“Not particularly,” you croaked, wiping sleep crust from your eyes. To be honest you weren't a hundred percent sure he wasn't some alcohol fuelled hallucination.

“Well, here.” He handed you a bowl and a spoon.

The bowl was hot, and the contents steaming, and it smelled better than most space rations you’d seen before. To be honest, you were starving; craving those delicious carbohydrates to chase the alcohol out of your system.

And, when your brain finally started working again, you noticed that he wasn’t wearing a full armour. Helmet, of course, but other than that, only a soft pair of trousers and a thin shirt. If you didn’t know better, you would say he had just gotten out of bed. But then… where were you?

Squinting, you peered around the room. A soft mattress, comfy blankets, a grey metal wall that was dotted with rust and dust. The light was dim, but warm. This wasn't home. And it wasn't the Crest.

Din coughed, you thought, a bit awkwardly, but as long as he was there, he could be as awkward as he wanted. “How’s the hangover?”

“Massive.”

“Eat.” He nodded to the bowl. "And drink this. It'll help."

You noticed the bottle in his hands. Putting the food down on the mattress, careful to not spill a drop, you took the bottle with a grateful smile. The cool liquid ran down your throat with such deliciousness that you had to bite down a moan. “Thank you.” You shook the bottle. It was empty.

“So, drinking alone, huh? That can’t be good for you.” He sat down on a crate.

You chuckled darkly and blew on the spoon before sticking it in your mouth. It was good. “Heh, well… who else would I be drinking with? You weren't there to keep me in check.".

Mando didn't say anything, he just watched as you ate.

You wished you knew how disappointed he looked underneath that helmet. When he wasn't talking, it was impossible to gauge the level of your humiliation. "Great." You squeezed your eyes shut and grimaced, preparing yourself for the mental blow, then you opened one eye and looked up at him. "What did I do? Please tell me I didn’t do anything stupid yesterday!” You searched your memory, jumping over huge, black holes, feeling more anxious with each void you passed.

“You didn’t. Well, you did try to start a fight with a wall, but that was partly my fault, I guess. And you talked a lot. Not that I understood all of it, you were pretty wasted. Hard to interpret, too.” He laughed loudly.

You groaned and hid your face in your hands. “Really? Crap! Listen, Mando -“

“I told you: my name is Din.”

Your brain stopped for a second. “…your name is Din.”

“Funny. That’s the same thing you said yesterday.” There was amusement in his voice.

Heat crept up your neck and blossomed around your ears. “Just unexpected, is all.” You briefly wondered about the implications of this, but decided to worry about that later. Your head hurt too much to think. “I like it. It’s a good name. Suits you.”

“Thanks.” Din grinned. You were never one to make a big deal of something. He liked that. "I'll let you freshen up. The bathroom is down the passageway and to the right. I’ve filled the freshwater tanks, so use what you need. I’ll be in the cockpit.”

“Thank you.” The food was still warm, and it filled your stomach nicely. That, combined with the water, your headache had receded to a dull thumping just behind your eyes. Bearable.

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Clean and feeling a thousand times better, you climbed the ladder to the cockpit, eager to hang out with Din - you couldn’t believe he told you his name! - before he had to fly off to his next job.

“Now it’s a good morning,” you said as a greeting after knocking to let him know you were there.

Din nodded. He was waiting for you, comfortably sprawled in the pilot seat, and gestured for you to sit when you remained by the door.

"So –" you started.

"Listen –" Din said at the same time.

"Go ahead."

“I…” He hesitated, suddenly uncertain how to proceed. “I should’ve come back much sooner. But the job… things… got in the way. I’ve… This past year has been…”

You blinked. This was unexpected. Your stomach tickled; a small hope blossomed in your chest. The way he danced around what he really wanted to say: you knew Din. He either had some really bad news, or… Your cheeks twitched, but you forced yourself to be calm.

“The moment I jumped into hyperspace, I realised that I didn’t want to leave.” He paused again, suddenly convinced he’d imagined all the things you said the day before. “I -“

You put your hand on his. “I didn’t want you to leave either.”

Din sat back. “I was…” he began, rubbing the back of his neck and searching for words. “Things happened. I had planned on returning after the job, but then…”

“Life happened”, you offered, and he nodded.

“Yeah. I needed more money, one job followed the other, and suddenly I had a responsibility other than myself.”

Your heart sank, feeling the weight of what he was saying. He’d found someone. Settled down. “Congratulations,” you said, but you didn’t really mean it.

“What?”

“You have a family now."

“A foundling. For a while we were a clan of two. But he couldn’t stay with me. This isn't a life for a kid. I was tasked with bringing him to his own people. And I did. He's… he's with someone who can train him now." His voice cracked and he swallowed hard.

Utter heartbreak radiated from him. You reached for him, but changed your mind, placing your hand awkwardly on your knee.

Din sighed. He needed to do this, now. The short rush of air from the release of his helmet rang in his ears. Keeping his eyes on you while he lifted it, he held his breath - afraid for your reaction.

The moment you realised what Din was doing, all air left your lungs. How often had you not imagined him without his armour, without the protective barrier between him and the world? Pictured his mouth, his eyes, how his face must shine when he laughed… Mandalorians simply did not remove their helmets, and if they did, they could never put it back on, and now he was letting you see him.

“…Din.” Your voice was a gentle warning.

He stopped mid-movement; chin just visible under the bottom edge.

You continued before he could say anything. “I’ve wanted to see you since the day we met. But please don’t break your creed for me. I’m not worth it.”

“I’m not,” he said, voice raw and emotional. “I want to look at you with my own eyes. Please. There is so much I’ve learned since… and this…” He lifted the helmet off, revealing his face to you with a smile and glistening eyes. “You areworth it.”

Never in a million years had you imagined how it would feel. His face was so gentle. Before you could stop yourself, you put your hand on his cheek. The rough stubbles tickled, but the skin was soft underneath, and the warmth spread through your body.

Din leaned into your touch and closed his eyes. "I have so much to tell you." He opened his eyes again. They were an abyss, and you felt yourself drowning.

Suddenly aware of yourself, your hand dropped back into your lap. "I have all the time in the world." It was barely a whisper, but you both heard the true meaning as if it was shouted. I'm with you to the edge of the universe and back.

"I should've come back before. But I was afraid. Afraid you would say no, but I just couldn't stop thinking about you. Cara hit me over the head more than once, practically ordering me to go back." He exhaled through his nose and smiled. What was it she used to say? What, are you stupid? Go to her. You're so CLEARLY in love, it's disgusting. "But then I found out Moff Gideon was involved too, and I couldn't let him near you. If, if you had been hurt because of him, I would never forgive myself. But he can't hurt you now."

Getting to his feet, he walked around the chair and stopped in front of you. Crouching down, he took both your hands in his, brushing his lips over your knuckles. "Were you serious when you said you would leave this planet if you could?

Not daring to look away, in case this was all a dream, you nodded and squeaked out a thin "Yeah." The sound took you by surprise, and you barked a laugh, breaking the tension in the small room.

Din laughed too, and gave you a crooked smile that almost made you slide off the seat. "I could use a co-pilot," he offered with a wink.

Looking dramatically around the room, you shrugged. "I can't fly."

"Well, company then," he replied, opening his arms to you.

You sank into his embrace, leaning forward with such force that he toppled backwards, pulling you with him. He didn't let go, and you landed on top of him, nose to nose, and with a vague feeling of your skin being on fire.

His warmth and scent enveloped you, and when he leaned up to gently press his lips against yours, thousands of tiny stars skipped over your body, leaving flames in their wake. This was not a time to be gentle, and you dipped down to mould yourself against him. You were home.

#mandalorian fanfic #din djarin x reader #the mandalorian #home #fanfiction #fluff #drunkenness #alcohol #writing is hard

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burnedbyshoto · 4 years

Text

a brush of luck

— In a world where soulmates exist you can communicate yours with a brush of a pen. It just doesn’t help that you are a certified idiot with a skill in misplacing things. —

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pairing: todoroki shouto x reader

warnings: fluff, angst, soulmate!au, cursing

word count: 4,229

a/n: this is for the bnaharem collab and I was super horrible and was not ready and i just woke up and threw this together please dont hate me uhuhuhuhhh see the masterlist here!!!

message to join my tag list!

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“Hey, y/l/n, you forget this!”

Your hair was falling into your face, your face flustered, and your binders filled with paper seemed to be liquid as they slowly fell to the ground.

Kaminari stood behind you when you turned around. His lips were picked into a kind smile. It was a teasing one too by the small glint in his eyes while he held onto your backpack and phone. A look of self-realized stupidity washed over your face when your head threw back into a groan. How stupid were you, really?

“I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, throwing your things onto the nearest desk. You felt the tips of your ears burn with embarrassment when Kaminari helped you slip on your backpack and pocketed your phone in the jacket pocket. “I swear I’m the most forgetful person in the world.”

“Well, you do really clinch the title of the person who would forget their head if it wasn’t on their shoulders.”

Snorting, you shoved him with your shoulder, and he helped you regather your things with a low groan.

“Let’s see the tattoo,” you grin, ready to head out once again. Groaning loudly, Kaminari didn’t seem to want to give in to your demand, but still, with a twitch of his eye and a shove of his sleeve, he showed off his arm. “You know what, I’m going to say it—”

“I’m going to say it, I don’t care that you broke your elbows,” Kaminari finishes the phrase with you with a snort.

“Do you think it’s the first thing out of their mouth or matching tattoo?” you asked curiously when you blond best friend also prepped to leave the classroom for the day.

“I hope its the first thing out of their mouth, imagine how fucking ultra sexy foxy hot that would be,” Kaminari moaned, his eyes rolling to the back of his eyes at the thought. Gagging at the visual horniness of that thought, you walked away, grinning at the way that Kaminari stumbled over his feet to catch up with you.

This was the world you lived in, the world of soulmates.

You weren’t sure when they had first started, but you know that it wasn’t always a phenomenon that was around. When you roamed the internet looking at old, old stories on soulmates, these theories, these worlds were built on one single concept.

They wrote about a world of black and white for everyone until that fateful moment, or matching tattoos for everyone. But no, this world was much more complicated, much more detailed. Yes, in the world there were a lot of theories that ended up being true, but the thing they didn’t see coming was that every couple — every polyamorous relationship consisted of a unique theme.

Kaminari’s soulmate was linked with tattoo’s, and the purpose behind said symbol was unknown, unheard of until he met them. Yours, as you could guess and know, was also different. Pressing your fingers against the pen that sat on the inside pocket of your uniform jacket, you smiled when Kaminari’s arm was thrown around you.

“At least you’ve never lost or forgotten that pen of yours, that would be dangerous!”

“I promise I will never ever forget it.”

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You sat on your bed nearing midnight. You were cocooned into your blankets flipping through your Hero Lawbook that you were supposed to have read months ago, but now finally was. Humming to yourself, you read through the apparent laws and the not so evident laws.

For instance, there is a law that Pro Heroes are not allowed to eat off the edge of buildings anymore! American transfer students had littered so much it became a law!

Snorting to yourself, you flipped the page.

But something warm pressed into your forearm, the most heated energy that sent shivers down your spine. It was comforting as it was ethereal. The second your body recognized the feeling, the Hero Lawbook went soaring across the room, and you grabbed your pen that was waiting at your side for ages now.

Hi, sorry I’m just able to get back to you. I had a bunch of homework and friends who just let me leave them.

Smiling to yourself, you twirled the pen in your fingers and scribbled down your response:

It’s all good, I’ve been studying this entire time too, was just bored and didn’t respond to you earlier today!

Your soulmate theme was straightforward and quite comprehensive — it was dubbed the Forearm and Pen theme (you hated that theme). You could communicate with your soulmate by writing with the pen on your arm, but it only worked with that pen, nothing else.

The year you were to turn sixteen, you received a pen from literally out of the blue. You remember celebrating New Year with your class in your first year at U.A.; it had been an enjoyable night! Everything in life was still going fantastic, and your class was finally past the excellent friend’s point and felt like a genuine family. You remember hugging and telling everyone good night, still being fifteen at that point, and stumbling back to your room exhausted.

When you had gotten back to your room, you didn’t even undress; simply tugging off your pants and removing your bra, you threw yourself onto the bed. But you had landed on something stiff and painful, groaning your hands shuffled for whatever it was that you fell on, and when you grabbed it, you froze at the sight of the white box.

Was this a gift?

Your entire life, you had always wondered if you did have a soulmate, most people you knew after all had soulmate markers that appeared since birth. But you were perfectly normal. You saw all colors; you had no shared pain; there was no tattoo, no mind link, no dream meetings.

Nothing.

You were normal.

Sighing, you opened the box, hoping that it was from someone you at the very least respected.

Inside was a silver pen.

You blinked your eyes rapidly, unsure of what you were looking at, there were no initials, no engraving, nothing.

It was an exquisite pen, and despite what you thought, it was very, very light. Frowning, your fingers pushed down on the pen, but there was nothing that came out, was there no ink?

Shrugging, you dragged it against your arm feeling the way that the cool tip delicately massaged your arm. It felt nice.

“Holy shit!”

Your eyes saw the pretty grey silvery ink on your forearm. It stood out against your skin, the ink appearing nowhere else but your arm, and then it hit you.

This was for your soulmate!

With excitement tearing through you, your exhaustion no longer bitting on your skull, but the overwhelming need to know that this was for your soulmate shook you awake. Twirling the pen in your fingers, you couldn’t help but start writing.

OMG HI

You sat there staring at your forearm, unsure as to what to do next. What do you do next?

Hey?

If your heart could be anywhere but your chest, you were nearly positive it existed within your throat at this very moment. This was nervewracking, holy shit.

Sorry, you don’t know me, but I’m ___ ___.

You frowned when you tried to write your name, it was stopping you.

It seems that we do have some rules to this entire thing.

They responded back to you, and as if they could hear you, you groaned loudly.

This soulmate shit was already stopping your excitement, it seemed.

From that very first night, the two of you were able to discover a few things. First off, anything too personal was not allowed to be written out. So names, location, and gender were the biggest ones. Birthdays were not, and you were quick to find out that both of you were still fifteen. Second of all, just because you couldn’t figure out where exactly you both were located, you did manage to put together that you were both in Japan. Third of all, your soulmate was a Hero in Training just like you and was a male. Last, of all, you were quick to realize that you were in love with the way your body felt like it was gently warming up whenever he messaged you.

I think I deserve a round of applause.

You grinned after writing your sentence, your eyes watching while the warmth filled your body and his writing slowly appearing on your forearm.

Did you not forget anything today? I find that hard to believe.

You had to suppress a scream.

WELL, IT HAPPENED! I GOT EVERYTHING I NEEDED TO BRING BACK TO MY ROOM WITH ME!!

Weren’t you the one who forgot to bring your entire backpack to school the other day?

NO! I said I almost did, but my bestie got it for me!

How do you forget everything? I think you should try to make a list to make sure that you always have things you need for the day.

... I do… but I always lose the list, and im always running late…

You’re the worst…

Congrats bbg, I’m your soulmate

The world really doesn’t want to bless me with a good life, it seems…

HEY, THAT’S MEAN!

The two of you banter for what seems like hours, the night sky fading from blackness to the deep blue of the sky right before the sunrise. You had spent the entire night curled into your pillow, your face shoved into the soft fabric to suppress your chortling snorts because you geniunely enjoyed interacting with your soulmate. But it was late, and you both had classes early that next morning.

Okay, asshole, I need to sleep! I got this stupid test tomorrow that I did not study for. I'll write to ya tomorrow!! Goodnight!!!

Don’t be rude to your soulmate :( but goodnight, and good luck on that test, sorry for keeping you up.

Smiling at his words, you put the pen to your forearm one last time.

I will never ever accept your apology for making me stay up, I love talking with you, goodnight soulmate, sweet dreams.

You placed the pen down, your eyes fluttering close, heavy with sleep. But still, no exhaustion could suppress the fluttering warmth in your body when words appeared on your arm.

Sweet dreams, soulmate.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

“Fuck, sorry,” you groaned when you sleepily slammed into the person standing in front of you.

Blinking tiredness away from your eyes — poorly at that too — you focused up at Shouto. Grinning, you waved at your classmate, who looked almost as exhausted as you felt and definitely looked.

“It’s okay,” he nodded at you stepping to the side so that the two of you could walk side to side.

“You ready for that test today?” you asked after moments of silence.

You and Todoroki Shouto were not as close as you would like to be. Since day one, you had always had a thing for the duality of a man, and while it was mostly superficial feelings derived from the fact that he was attractive above anything else, it still made you awkward around him. At the time, your feelings were still holding you down, you always fully believed that you had no soulmate, so you thought maybe you could sweep him off his feet. It was rumored that his scar covered up his own soulmate mark, so there was no way for him to know who his soulmate was.

Selfishly and embarrassingly, you hoped that you could have him.

Then you met your soulmate, and things changed.

But now you and your classmates were all eighteen and held the world in your hands, yet you couldn’t speak to him usually still.

“There’s no test today?” Shouto stilled, his eyes narrowing in confusion, and your eyes screwed too.

“Isn’t it… Friday? We have a Hero Law test?”

“Y/l/n,” Shouto snorted a grin spreading across his features, “It’s Wednesday.”

If there was a god, he would shoot you right now.

Your cheeks burned with embarrassment while you walked faster to the classroom, Shouto keeping up with your pace easily, he was taller than you after all.

“Shut up,” you warned, your gaze not reaching Shouto’s who was staring at you.

“I wasn’t speaking.”

“I could hear you thinking!”

Shouto put on a smirk, his eyes teasing you, and his mouth dropping to speak, but there was a loud interruption.

“Y/L/N-CHAAAANNNNNN!!!!”

Both of you turned to see Kaminari chasing after you, his arms waving, looking out of breath.

“YOU FORGOT YOUR JACKET AND TIE!”

Shouto chuckled beside you, and you stared down to see that you were, in fact, only wearing half of your uniform. If there’s a god, he will end you now, you thought.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

You're not serious right now, are you?

Going on three years of knowing your soulmate, or at the very least talking with him, you thought you had a good understanding of who he was. He was strong, powerful, and kind. He came off a bit standoffish at times but was the dumbest person you’ve ever known. Common sense was not his friend, and that was okay.

Even at times when the two of you had your differing opinions because it did happen, it never snowballed more into a small annoyance that the two of you would apologize for and move on. But this was something that shouldn’t have had become a fight, it shouldn’t have been anything more potent than a difference of opinion, but when you suggested entertaining the thought of when the two of you would finally meet, he was uncharacteristically cold.

Hurt by his tone, you told him, and he said you to grow up until it became this written fight.

Why couldn’t you talk about meeting?

Why didn’t he want to think about what would happen when the two of you would meet?

It was getting ugly for no reason, a fight just to fight, and it was making you nauseous.

But he crossed a line that couldn’t be fixed when he wrote a simple sentence:

Just because you’re my soulmate doesn’t mean I have to love you, meet you, or marry you.

So there you sat, your bottom lip trembling with tears streaking down your blotchy face. He wasn’t being serious, was he? There was no way… no fucking way this was him. The warmth that flooded your body with his new message felt ice-cold, poisoning you from the inside out while you read it.

You're my soulmate, but I have no obligation to do anything with you now or ever. The world chose you for me, not me. I didn’t choose you. I don’t owe you anything here. Soulmates are bullshit and don’t fucking bother messaging me again if you expect me to fall in love with you just because our “souls are connected”

It was needless to say that you didn’t respond back, not because you felt like he should love you because of your connected souls, but because your sobbing and broken emotions left you curled into a ball, ready for a sleepless slumber to take you.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

“You don’t look too hot,” Kaminari told you, hitting you with his foot when your bleary and puffy eyes stared at your best friend.

Kirishima and Mina, who were sitting beside him, elbowed him at the same time, berating him for his insensitive comment. You could feel Sero and Bakugou staring at you, their eyes concerned and curious.

“What’s eating ya up?” Sero asked, and you found a rock-forming in your throat when you shrugged.

“Soulmate problems…”

“That was fucking obvious,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, taking a drink of his water. “Tell us the problem, not a stupid summary.”

Surprisingly that’s all it took for you to come undone, and you explained what happened with tears falling down your face and a sniffling nose. There was a lot to tell them about it, and you showed them the pen while explaining the entire story. They listened to every word you uttered, faces concern but taking in everything you said.

“You’re an idiot,” Bakugou spoke the second you were finished, his eye twitching while he glared at you. You swallowed thickly, placing the pen on the table while Bakugou edged closer towards you. “He’s not wrong, you know, stupid fucking soulmates are just this irrational solution to an irrational problem. Love is much more complex than that, and you don’t seem to have been fighting for him in that way either, sure you seem like good friends, but that doesn’t give you the right to expect him to love you. But he was a complete fucking dick about it, so I say kill him.”

Your — and all of the rest of your friend group — eyes widened at his words. With nothing to follow him up, you all continued to stare at him while he munched on his food.

“WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING EXTRAS LOOKING AT!”

“Is Bakugou a love expert?” Mina’s stage whispered to the group.

“He almost was, but then he said to kill y/n’s soulmate, so probably not anymore,” Kirishima responded back.

“SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I KILL YOU!”

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

It took four days before the warm feeling shot through your body again.

Fuck, I'm really sorry, I was a complete fucking dick. I said a lot of things, and i didn’t mean to say I was angry and upset, and I know that you're upset, rightfully upset, but i don’t want to lose you.

No matter how long it took for him to get back to you, your heart squeezed with euphoria and poison, your hands moving to grab your pen in your pocket.

It wasn’t there.

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.

You tore apart your room, trying to find the silver pen but you couldn’t find it.

Stay as mad as you want, I just… please talk with me soon, even if it takes five days. I'm sorry, soulmate.

Frustrated tears poured down your face, nausea almost making you wheeze when you stared at the words you wanted to reply to.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

One day after he apologized:

Don’t want to bother you, just wanted to apologize again and say that I miss you, talk to you soon.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

Five days after he apologized:

I’m not really sure if this is normal or not… I'm not really… educated when it comes to romance and shit like that, especially when it comes to someone being upset with the other… my female classmates told me that I should expect a response from you soon. I'm really sorry, please write soon.

⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆

So it seems that i’ve fucked up to the point of no return. I'm sorry, I miss you, I love you. Maybe one day I can reconvince you that I'm your soulmate for a good reason, but I guess I’ll have to work on that.

It had been fourteen days since he had apologized, and you sat in your room with tears streaming down your face. You wanted to respond back, but even fourteen days of tirelessly searching U.A.’s entire campus, ripping it stone by stone, there was no finding your pen. Every day without fail, he gave you an update of his day and another apology. Every day they got more hopeless, more pained.

This was his last message for a while, he needed time to work things out with himself now, the strain of this and graduation coming soon being too much to handle at the moment.

Wiping your tears for what felt like the hundredth time within this past twenty minutes, you stood up on your wobbly legs to go downstairs for water. You were dehydrated and absolutely needed to get out for both fresh air and water.

Walking down the stairwell with swollen eyes, you groaned when you slammed into a body when you opened the door to the common area.

Shouto blinked down at you, and you felt your throat clampdown at the pained look in his own eyes.

“Have you been—”

“Are you—”

You both spoke over each other, and despite the horrid feeling coursing through your bones, you cracked a smile.

“I’m getting water,” you explained with a shrug. “Long night ya know, just needed to replenish my system so I can cry some more.”

Shouto stared at you, and with horror, you realized precisely what you had said.

“Oh my god, ignore me!” you squeak, covering your face trying to move past him, but Shouto seemed to be curious now and followed after you.

“What’s making you cry?” he asked while you rush to the fridge to get your glass of water.

“What’s got you upset?” you counter downing the cup of water.

Shouto sighed, leaning against the counter of the island in the kitchen. “Would it be weird to say its soulmate issues?”

Swallowing the water in your mouth, you shook your head, a tired smile on your face, “Embarrassingly enough, my issue is also with soulmate stuff.”

A joyless chuckle escaped his mouth, and Shouto’s head tilted backward. You studied his jaw and the way his body seemed tense, too tense.

“What happened?” you press gently standing next to him, shouldering him gently.

“I fucked up, and now my soulmate won’t talk with me,” he says slowly, his head nodding while he glances at you. “I guess telling your soulmate you don’t want them is a bad thing.”

You snorted, nodding your head in agreement, “It’s not just a bad thing, its a super fucked up thing.”

Shouto sighed in agreement, and there was silence when you took another drink of your water.

“I didn’t know you were in contact with your soulmate, though,” you smile wistfully, your hand twirling the cup on the counter. “How’d you meet them?”

“I actually don’t know who they are,” Shouto admitted with pursed lips, and your eyebrows scrunched in confusion. “I have that soulmate thing where you write on your arm, and they can read it.”

Showing off his arm, you glanced at the pale skin. You nodded your head when he pulled out a silver pen that looked similar to yours.

“Well,” you shrug your shoulders, motioning him to write. “I’m no expert, but let’s see if I can help you get your soulmate to forgive you.”

“T-They haven’t responded to me in two weeks…” Shouto’s voice cracks, and the number burns a hole through your stomach. “I’ve written every day, but no answer. I don’t really know what to do, and all the girls in the class don’t really know what to do. Bakugou also said to go fuck myself over it, so I don’t think I really have had any help.”

Ignoring the twisting in your stomach, you willed your weirdness away to shuffle in your seat, “Well, you haven’t asked me, asshole, come on, let’s see what I can do.”

Shouto chuckles, his head nodding, “That is true, but to be fair, you’ve been anywhere, but in the dorm these past few weeks.”

“I lost something,” you mutter embarrassed, but you shake away your problems and point at his wrist. “Write an apology.”

You watched when he wrote, the words expressing his apology and love seeping through the silvery ink on his wrist. You told him to add things to delete things, but in the end, it ended up feeling like a genuine and sincere apology. You watched his pen leave his skin and a warmth shot through your arm.

Shivering, you looked at your arm, trying to see what your soulmate had written to you even though he said he was going to stop.

The words he wrote appeared on your skin.

Your eyes widened when you stared at Shouto, who was also staring at your arm.

Your eyes met in an almost world-altering way. This entire time, for three whole years, the two of you had been by each other and never knew. Midnight conversations wasted through ink instead of face to face. Your heart hammered in your throat, and tears once again poured from your eyes when you both stood at full height, staring at each other.

Todoroki Shouto was your soulmate — he was yours, and you were his.

“I’m so sorry, y/n, I don’t know what happened to me. You didn’t deserve that, and fuck, I’m so sorry—”

“I lost my pen, and I couldn’t respond back, I forgave you, but I had no way of reaching back! But I was always forcing myself onto you—”

You both interrupted the other, and now you stared at each other, drinking in the presence of each other and belittling yourselves for not knowing sooner; looking at it now, it was just so obvious. You can’t help it and pull him into a hug. His strong arms wrap around you, and you can hear his hammering heart on your ear, and it fills you up with the familiar warmth when he writes you. This seemed to be a brush of luck it seems.

“Can I kiss you, soulmate.”

“Please do.”

#todoroki shouto #todoroki shoto x reader #todoroki x reader #todoroki shouto x reader #todoroki fluff #bnha #bnha x reader #mha #mha x reader

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tuanhood · 4 years

Text

hypnotic | part one

paring: vampire!im jaebeom x reader

genre: angst, eventual smut (part two), vampire au

warnings: language, cringey vampire cliches i’m sure

word count: 9,800+

summary: jaebeom has been waiting 200 years to find his mate - the one who can break his trance and isn’t affected by his hypnotic abilities. You don’t seem to be that person, but he just can’t seem to get you out of his mind… why?

a/n: hello guys! so i originally had this planned to post tomorrow (the 30th) but it was so long i decided to split it up and post one part today and the other part on the 31st! This first part is mostly Jaebeom and not a lot of Y/N but SO BE IT. This is also my first time writing in the genre of vampire/fantasy loL so please forgive me because it’ll probably be cringe and not make sense. if that’s the case lol drop me a message!! also vampire jaebeom was requested FOREVER ago. so here it is practically 3 decades later. and i attempted to make a banner. if someone can make me a better one it’s v much WELCOME.

part two

Knock Knock Knock

He wished he could just pretend like he was asleep. He wished he could use that as an excuse to not answer the door, but based on the very strong feeling he was getting from who was behind it – that wouldn’t work.

“I know you’re in there! Just answer the damn door Jaebeom!”

Jaebeom rolled his eyes, leave it to Bambam to be at his front door before the day even had a chance to truly begin. Before letting him in, he went through all the possible things or excuses he could use to get out of whatever his younger friend had in mind.

“Is your vintage YSL here or is it still at the dry cleaners?” Bambam asked, pushing past Jaebeom as soon as he has the door partway open.

Gruffly, Jaebeom turned back into his apartment to Bambam already halfway to his bedroom – no doubt to look through his closet, “What are you doing here Bam?”

“What does it look like? I’m here for the vintage YSL asshole!”

He’s learned by now that it’s better to let him do his thing – whatever that may mean. So instead of following Bambam, he plopped down onto the same couch he’s had for nearly 15 years. “You know when I first bought that shirt it wasn’t considered vintage!”

Jaebeom waited for a response, but instead, he was met with silence. After a few moments – many of them thinking about how maybe it was time to replace the couch – he felt his “vintage” YSL button-down hit him in the face.

He groaned; the impact was surely going to create wrinkles in the material he tried to keep in pristine condition. It was ironic since he was often heard making fun of how much Bambam cared about clothes, but Jaebeom liked to keep his things nice. “Bam I just got it back from getting cleaned a couple of days ago.”

“Put it on.”

The tone of his friend’s voice seemed rather impatient. If he had closed his eyes, Jaebeom would have thought he was talking to Jinyoung or even himself.

“Why do I need to put it on? It’s 8 in the morning; where are we going?”

“Um excuse me? Did you forget what day it was? Now come on, we’re meeting Jinyoung at that new café down the street in fifteen.”

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, trying to picture the café on the mental map he keeps in his mind, “the one that used to be a video store in the 90s?”

Bambam made his way into the living room, picking up a few glasses that rested on the coffee table Jaebeom’s feet were on top of, and marched over to the small kitchen. Jaebeom has lived in this apartment more years than he’d like to admit, especially because enough time had passed that the neighbors he had were clearly aging and he just stayed 26. The thought of moving somewhere new often enters his mind, but with this place, he just can’t bring it in himself to go quite yet. It’s almost as though something is tying him to this city, this place – like he’s waiting for something.

“Yes, and a speakeasy in the 20s both of which are not important right now because we live in the 21st century Jaebeom. Now come on, Jinyoung’s waiting – that asshole is always early.”

He heard Bambam mumble something along the lines of known him 100 years, would it kill him to just be on time for once, as he furiously dropped the glasses on the kitchen counter.

“Do I have to go?”

Bambam paused his motions of putting Jaebeom’s dirty dishes into the sink to stare the older vampire down, “Jaebeom you only turn 200 once.”

He scoffed in response, “Jesus don’t remind me.”

“We have to make a whole day of it! So please just put the shirt on, because I want you looking presentable,” he stopped in the middle of his sentence, suddenly wiggling his eyebrows, “you never know what could happen.” The final word is drawn out, almost sing-song like and it drives Jaebeom up the wall because he knows exactly what Bambam is referencing.

For Jaebeom and those like Jaebeom, they didn’t consider the day they were born as their birthday, but instead as the day they turned. There was no point in celebrating their birth anymore as they were no longer alive. However, at this point after 200 birthdays, – alive and dead combined - Jaebeom was beginning to believe that there was no point to those either. He always knew being immortal was a curse but day by day that idea was only solidifying itself in his mind.

Jaebeom let out a gruff breath which only made Bambam look up from the fork he was scrubbing, “Bam I don’t know what you think is going to happen today… but it certainly isn’t that.”

The “that” he was referencing was one of the main factors that as of late had made him feel like living forever was indeed a waste. It was the thing that was supposed to make him feel “complete.” According to old texts and traditional vampire folklore, he was now walking around half full, but once he met his mate, he would become whole. At first, he didn’t believe the tale. He had gotten by so far without a mate that the idea of him not being complete made him laugh. But watching both Bambam and Jinyoung find their mates – Bambam 70 years ago and Jinyoung 16 years ago – made him finally acknowledge and reflect on the piece of himself he was missing.

And fuck he was lonely.

Bambam chuckled at him as if being in on his own personal joke. His friend was strange like that sometimes, “just put the shirt on Jaebeom.”

By the time he’s had the shirt on and Bambam has somehow convinced him to let him wear his Rolex he got as a gift from his friend Jackson in 1920, Jaebeom feels mentally prepared to leave the house and embark on this dreadful day. The reminder that he has now been around for 200 years and still is not whole.

“Finally,” Jinyoung sighed when Jaebeom and Bambam finally reached the café down the street, “I’ve been waiting 20 minutes.”

A disgruntled Bambam checks his watch, “well if you don’t want to wait every single time, don’t be so fucking early,” he promptly turned to Jaebeom to share his grief regarding their friend, “you think he would learn after all this time.”

“Let’s just go order,” Jaebeom shrugged, not caring to be in another disagreement between his longer than life friends.

“Be honest you’re early on purpose just so it gives you something to complain about and a reason to make us feel bad!”

Jinyoung ignored Bambam’s theory, replying to the oldest, “no need. I already ordered for the three of us. It’s a special day, the birthday boy doesn’t need to pay,” he glanced at Bambam, “you on the other hand…”

The two new arrivals, flop down into the sofa chairs on either side of Jinyoung, along of them situated to make a half-circle in front of a low coffee table. The three of them had somehow stuck into this… pattern. Years of friendship that contained years of Bambam/Jinyoung squabbles that Jaebeom would often have to mediate. Patterns were nice, but sometimes they would get old – especially after so long.

As the two of them argue over whether or not Bambam should pay Jinyoung back for a simple iced Americano because Bam swears he got the drinks the last two times, Jaebeom looks over to the counter where the baristas work on – no doubt – the plethora of orders they have. The factor of the café being new has certainly been the cause of the popularity and amount of people in the shop. He can’t help but feel bad for the individuals working on the drinks – three years ago he had been one of them for roughly 18 months and knew that it wasn’t as easy as it appeared to be.

In retrospect, Jaebeom didn’t have to work. He had so much time to learn and understand what it meant to be financially responsible. Not only that, but he’s literally had hundreds of years to save. Plus, his early investments in companies ended up landing him some pretty substantial and valuable shares. Jaebeom was sitting on quite the pretty penny.

“Wow your portfolio is remarkable… I’ve never seen one like it,” his latest financial advisor had said to him in complete awe, “I mean an early investor in Amazon? Apple? Mastercard?”

Jaebeom had laughed nervously, “What can I say? My grandpa had good intuition, I guess.”

Money aside, he had wanted something to do with his time – hence his barista job. It was fun, but like most things, Jaebeom just grew tired of it and as he watched the girl working the espresso machine let out an exhausted breath, he realized that he wasn’t missing it.

Jaebeom has become good at studying people. It was something he still wasn’t sure of whether it was a vampire thing or just something he had picked up over time. Watching the girl at the machine, her hair is in a low bun, a few strands falling in front of her face. It’s clear with the way the hair tie is situated, that the hairstyle was once a bit neater, tighter, and sat at the middle or even top of her head. However, the now fallen placement and slight disarray signal how busy she’s been working and how fried she must be feeling.

He looks to the string bracelet on her wrist, visible from far away enough for Jaebeom to conclude that she must have someone in her life deemed important to wear one of those “friendship” bracelets. He never saw the point, but humans were strange creatures, despite him once being one.

Jaebeom’s breath hitches when he catches sight of the delicately drawn tattoo on her wrist near the bracelet. It’s of lavender and it immediately reminds him of his mother who had loved exploring the lavender field that had been near his home when he was a child. Despite all the time that has passed since he lost his mother, the pain that aches inside of Jaebeom when he thinks of her isn’t any less.

His thoughts are interrupted by the call at the coffee bar, “Order for Jinyoung.”

The call comes from the overworked girl he had been studying and Jaebeom wants more than anything to stand up and retrieve their orders. He finds a weird want to hear what her laugh sounds like. Maybe he could say something or strike up a conversation that would-

“What are you doing?” It takes Jaebeom a moment to notice that he has partially stood up from his chair as if he’s about to go somewhere. Cluelessly, he replied, “going to get the drinks.”

The youngest shook his head, “No way! Birthday boys don’t get their drinks, they don’t lift a finger.”

He knew Bambam was one to take birthdays seriously, but this was beginning to feel like it was going the extra mile too many.

“I’ll get it.”

Jaebeom watched Bambam get up to retrieve the drinks. He expects him to just grab the drinks and return to the table, but instead, Bambam says something to the girl. Arching his neck to the side, he tries to make a clear path to eavesdrop on what’s being said, hearing being one of the benefits of turning. Unfortunately, the café is too loud for him to focus on the conversation and he’s defeated by the fact that he’ll have to stay in the dark.

The girl laughs loudly at something Bambam said and Jaebeom can’t help but feel mixed about it. On one hand, he got his wish – hearing her laugh – but on the other hand, he wasn’t the cause of it. For some reason it makes him bring his clench and unclench his fists which rest on the arms of the sofa chair. Jinyoung takes notice.

Jaebeom quickly looks down at his lap when he senses that Bambam is returning to where they’re sat, not wanting to give away that he had been staring. First, he places Jinyoung’s and his drink on the table, soon turning back around to go back and fetch the last drink – Jaebeom’s.

When he comes back, Jaebeom looks up to see a large grin spread across the youngest’s face. He has that look again – the one as if he knows a joke Jaebeom doesn’t.

The latter nodded his head in thanks for getting the drinks as he inspects his green tea on the table. Just as he’s about to pick up the mug, he’s stopped in his tracks by an announcement coming from the coffee bar.

“Hello everyone! Sorry for the interruption, but I’ve been told that we have a birthday here today,” you said. Giving announcements wasn’t your strong suit, but you figured now that you were an actual owner of something, you were going to get over your shyness. But you didn’t think it was going to be that often that a tall, skinny and pale boy with a Rolex on his wrist would be asking you to get your coffee shop to sing happy birthday for his friend. Even when you were a barista working for someone else no one had made such a request. This was a café after all, not an Applebee’s.

Jaebeom wished more than anything that he could sink into his seat and just disappear. If only that cliché that vampires turned into bats were true, then he could just fly away at a moment’s notice. Leave it to Bambam to torture him like this. It wasn’t intentional of course, but it certainly felt like it to Jaebeom.

It was especially tragic to him because the girl he had been studying was the one leading the entire café in singing “Happy Birthday.” He did his best to avoid looking at her, feeling like his entire body was heating up in embarrassment even though he couldn't heat up.

You on the other hand felt a little insulted by the birthday boy’s lack of eye contact. You hadn’t even managed to get a good look at him before you started singing and now it was not possible with the way that he was looking down at the ground, his long hair falling in front of his face, concealing itself to you. It wasn’t difficult to conclude that he felt awkward about a bunch of strangers he had never met singing him happy birthday, you had felt the same whenever your friends tried to ambush you on your birthday… but you at least looked up and acknowledged the presence of the people singing. A tight smile from this guy would even be happily accepted.

When the song is over and the claps that follow finally subside, he looks up to see the café back at its previous state of normalcy, not a single person looking at him anymore. Jaebeom lets out a sigh of relief.

“You could at least act like you liked it,” Bambam huffed in annoyance. He wished Jaebeom could appreciate the idea of birthdays like he did.

“I really didn’t need to be the center of attention today Bam.”

“But it’s your bir-” Bambam begins to explain, but Jaebeom abruptly cuts him off, not wanting to hear his reasoning for today’s antics, yet again. The day hadn’t even started.

“My birthday, I know. Thanks for reminding me.”

Jinyoung clears his throat and plays with the spoon that came with his Flat White. Just as Jaebeom is the mediator for Bambam and Jinyoung, sometimes Jinyoung has to be the mediator for Jaebeom and Bambam. Essentially the commonality in the disagreements of their trio friendship is Bambam and currently, Jinyoung feels as though he should route the conversation elsewhere.

“What else is in the cards for tonight then boys?”

It’s then based on the look on Jaebeom’s face, that Jinyoung thinks that maybe talking about the plans for tonight – on Jaebeom’s birthday – isn’t re-routing the conversation. Especially since it’s Bambam’s whose eyes light up and is the one to reply to him.

“Obviously we’re going out tonight,” Bambam paused and turned to Jaebeom, wagging his finger in the latter’s face, “there’s no way you’re getting out of this. I’m not taking no for an answer this time.”

Jaebeom rolled his eyes and didn’t respond as he knew he didn’t have a choice in the matter. He had rejected Bambam’s invitations to go out consistently for the last 6 months and on his birthday of all days, Bam was going to force him out of the house just as he had done this morning to come to the café.

He looks back to the front counter, his eyes searching for the barista who has now suddenly disappeared. A frown begins to make itself known on his face, feeling a bit disappointed by the fact that she may have left already or gone elsewhere, but soon she’s popping up from behind the counter, no doubt getting something from the cabinets below. Jaebeom feels relief.

“What did you say to her?” he asked suddenly looking back at Bambam.

He cocked his head to the side, confused, “What did I say to who?”

“The barista behind the counter.”

His friend nodded his head slowly, suddenly realizing what Jaebeom means. A smirk appears on his face, “nothing much… Just how it was your birthday and it would be really good if we could all embarrass you by singing about it. She’s not a barista, by the way, she owns the place. Kinda backward thinking there Jae. It’s the 21st century, women can own things now, they can vote.”

“I know that,” Jaebeom hissed.

Bambam puts up his hands in defeat, “I’m just making sure.”

“Don’t you know her?” Jinyoung asked, “isn’t that why we came here?”

Jaebeom’s interests are perked. It’s not often that the three of them meet new people. It’s not like there’s a huge point to it. The last new person the three of them met was Mark – also a vampire – a bartender at their favorite club in the city, but that was in 2007.

He waits for Bambam’s explanation as to how he knows this girl and why they came here specifically beside it just being near Jaebeom’s apartment.

Waving his hand nonchalantly, the Thai boy gives his answer, “I don’t really know her. Minji does. Met her in some kind of class, I think. SoulCycle? Pilates? Zumba? I don’t know. I can’t keep up with her and her activities these days.”

Minji is Bambam’s mate. He had turned her only a month after they met.

Jaebeom’s not sure what he would do if he met his mate. He doesn’t know if he would want to subject them to turning and living the same kind of life as him, but he also doesn’t know if he could continue life alone after meeting his mate. If he ever meets them.

“Why the curiosity?” Jinyoung asked, for once finding it hard to remain stone-faced. Even his usual chill, non-revealing demeanor seems to fade away when it appears that his older friend might be attracted to someone.

Jaebeom simply shrugged, “it’s nothing…”

“What do you think? Could she be the one?” Bambam asked teasingly, pointing to the girl behind the counter.

Jinyoung rolled his eyes almost immediately at the younger boy, “if you’re going to keep bothering him about it, don’t make it so obvious idiot.”

Jaebeom had been alive – or more like undead – for 200 years and more than half of that time he had to listen to this same conversation from his friends over and over again. His patience was wearing thin and 180 years later, he was tired of their pestering.

He leaned forward slowly and grabbed his green tea off the table, making sure to visibly flinch at the heat of the drink, Bambam, and Jinyoung chuckling at his reaction. Out of the three of them, Jaebeom certainly had the most practice when it came to “putting on a show” for the humans and “acting” the most human. Taking a sip, he looked back at the girl behind the counter.

The youngest vampire had spent many of their outings and conversations hypothesizing who Jaebeom’s mate could be. Despite being the oldest of the three, Jaebeom was the only one left who still hadn’t found his mate and he was beginning to feel hopeless. Typically, Bambam pointed out any human girl as a candidate – all of them of course ended up not being his mate. Therefore, Jaebeom didn’t pay attention to his picks anymore, but he had to admit… He did get a strange feeling from the girl behind the counter.

Jaebeom looked to you, hoping to catch your gaze as you quickly made the coffee orders for the few people waiting to the side of the cash register. Just when he was about to give up and focus his attention back on his friends, you tore your concentration away from the drink in your hand and looked up at him from across the cafe.

Jaebeom focused his gaze deep onto you with his eyes – testing, checking, and trialing your focus. You didn’t look away, instead, you trained your eyes deeply into his and stared at him until finally, it was Jaebeom who broke the contact.

He shook his head at his friends, disappointed by your inability to break the trance and ultimately confused at the feeling he still got from you despite that.

Jaebeom took another sip of the tea, “it’s not her.”

“Did you have to debate that Uber driver on the Twilight franchise?” Jinyoung groaned at Bambam as soon as they’re out of the car.

The entire twenty-minute ride, he had got into a heated discussion with their driver on how Twilight was not “true” or realistic to most actual vampire folklore. It had been an excruciating thing to listen to.

“Got to stand up for our kind dude.”

“Okay, but what happens when she starts asking how you know all these things or why you’re so interested in vampire stuff?” Jinyoung tended to always be right. This wasn’t an exception.

Brushing off his pants, Bambam gives him a nonchalant wave, “chill out man. Everyone loves vampire stuff.”

“Maybe in 2008,” Jaebeom said just barely loud enough for his friends to hear them. The two of them laughed, Bambam shoving him playfully on the shoulder, “Birthday boy getting funny on us.”

“I was always funny,” Jaebeom deadpanned.

“Funny and looking good tonight. Let’s get you laid, shall we?”

After a day that was jampacked full of various activities planned by his youngest friend, the last thing Jaebeom wanted to do was spend extra energy on trying to get some girl to come home with him tonight. Besides, he wasn’t that guy anymore.

Jinyoung scoffed, “he doesn’t need to get laid tonight.”

“Yes, he does! Jaebeom how long has it been?”

This time it’s Jinyoung that shoves Bambam’s shoulder – except it’s not all that playful.

“Fine don’t answer that, but I’m just saying there will be quite a few girls here that you can have your pick of, despite your plain outfit.”

Jaebeom looked at the clothes he had changed into when Bambam spared him a sliver of time to go back home to digress and feed his cats. The latter had wanted him to borrow clothes of his, but instead, Jaebeom decided on pulling pieces from his closet that felt more like him, less like Bambam. A plain pair of ripped jeans, an oversized black shirt that he had bought at a shop from his trip to London last year, and his mother’s necklace that often wasn’t missing from its spot around his neck.

Bambam’s earlier critique was that he was dressed too basic and that no girls would bat an eye at him. Girls don’t like plain guys, he had said. The comment makes Jaebeom wonder about you and whether you’d fall under the category of not liking “plain” guys.

He bites the inside of his cheek. It was probably the eighth time he had made himself do it today. Jaebeom had found his mind often drifting to you throughout the day for some unexplainable reason. During their walk in the park, he wondered if you would take strolls during your breaks from the café or when Bambam forced him to go paint pottery for an hour and a half he thought about what you would paint. It frustrated him because he hadn’t even spoken to you – not a word and yet you were clearly on his mind for one reason or another. It wasn’t even like you were his mate. He had tried to see if you were unaffected by his trance, his hypnotic capabilities, but you had just stared at him completely fixated just as everyone else was.

Jaebeom was not going to think about you any longer. He was already planning on avoiding your café.

“We’re on the list,” Bambam tells the bouncer when they arrive at the entrance of the club. He scans the list and motions his head towards the direction of the door to signal to the three of them to go on ahead. There’s a bit of a whine coming from the people waiting in line which admittedly so makes Jaebeom feel a little guilty, but Bambam ensures him it’s fine, “why have a friend who works at a club if we can’t use him for the perks?”

“Why does he keep bartending again?” As soon as the question is out of Jaebeom’s mouth he realizes it was a stupid thing to ask since the answer is apparent.

Bambam laughed at him, giving his long – irreplaceable he’d like to remind everyone – leather coat to the person at the front of the club. Jaebeom swears he hears him tell the coat check guy the “proper” way to put it on a hanger.

“Obviously for the girls Jaebeom.”

Mark’s mate – Hana had passed on a long time ago. Jaebeom had never got the chance to meet her, only hears about her in passing from some stories that Mark has told the three of them. He hadn’t turned her. Jaebeom’s never asked why.

“Girls… of course.”

He can’t help but think about how Mark must feel inside. Although Jaebeom doesn’t know him as well as he knows Bambam and Jinyoung, whenever he’s with the older boy he’s always got a smile on his face. Often quiet, but he’s always got certain energy bouncing off of him that would indeed make him popular with women. However, if what they say about mates is true, would that mean that a piece of Mark was now missing? Did he feel like he was less of a person? Jaebeom felt like that sometimes and he hadn’t even met his mate yet. Mark had his, but now he didn’t.

“Drinks?” Jinyoung asked the two of them and Jaebeom is partly surprised. Out of the three of them, Bambam was the one who was the most comfortable in a club or even bar setting. He figures that Jinyoung must be using his birthday as an excuse to cut loose and become someone else for the night.

Bambam instantly nodded his head at Jinyoung’s suggestion and Jaebeom finds himself trailing behind the two of them as they make their way over to Mark at the bar who is throwing his head back at something the girl across the bar is saying. Judging on Jaebeom’s intuition – it’s a bit fake and overplayed, but you got to do what you got to do.

“My man!” Bambam yelled over the music, leaning against the counter in a way to make sure he doesn’t get the elbows of his long sleeve turtleneck wet. Mark in response, turned to them and smiled, then routing his attention back to the girl, giving her an apologetic smile. Her half-smile says everything Jaebeom could need to know – this girl would not be going home with Mark after his shift tonight.

“What can I get you guys tonight,” Mark turned to Jaebeom and the latter can barely make out his sharp canines in the dark club, “birthday boy you want anything special?”

Before Jaebeom can reply that he wants to be at home, Bambam answers for him.

“Could we maybe get something that’s off the menu?” He wiggled his eyebrows at Mark who gave him a shit-eating grin, knowing immediately what he was talking about.

“Off the menu” meant Mark’s secret stash of O negative underneath the counter. While alcohol had the same effect on them that it had on the average humans, adding a bit of blood just made a little bit better. Okay… it made it a lot better.

“Three negronis coming right up,” Mark winked to give a little signal that these would most likely not be as well composed or put together as a negroni, but due to them being in public, he couldn’t necessarily announce a shit ton of alcohol mixed with human blood was going to be served up to them.

“How has your birthday been Jae?” Mark asked as he was in the middle of placing three glasses onto the countertop in between them.

It was difficult to explain since to Jaebeom it had just been another day except for a little bit more excruciating. The celebration of another year “older” filled him with thoughts of how much time has passed, whether he’s done anything truly important and why he still hasn’t found the person who is meant to complete him… but like he said only a little more excruciating than any other day.

Jaebeom shrugged in response, “Bam planned a lot and for the most part, it was…” he paused for a moment, wondering if he should say how he felt – numb, lost, and wishing the day would come to an end as if tomorrow won’t bring the same thoughts or problems. But as he looked at his friends who had tried so hard today to make him happy and celebrate, he decided to guard them against the ultimate truth, “for the most part it was fun – really good. I mean besides the singing at the café of course.” He throws in the last part to at least have some kind of believability to his story.

He notices Mark’s eyebrows lift out of curiosity as his concentration focuses on measuring out each part of the drinks, “An entire café sang you happy birthday? Damn, I don’t think I could ever get through that, so I can only imagine how you feel.”

“That was Bam’s idea,” Jinyoung muttered.

Once again, Bambam does his nonchalant waving of the hand, “it wasn’t that bad. I mean okay, maybe it was… But Jaebeom was obsessed with the girl who led it.”

Jaebeom suddenly feels like he wants to put duct tape over his friend’s mouth.

“I was not obsessed with her! I don’t even know her!” Jaebeom for some reason felt the need to defend himself, which was probably the worst option. Him getting defensive was usually a tell-tale sign for his friends being right on whatever they were confronting him with.

Bambam scoffed, bringing gliding his drink across the bar to be directly in front of him once Mark has poured it neatly into the short glass, “I noticed you staring at her before I went to get the drinks. That’s why I asked her to do it in the first place.”

“So, she doesn’t know Minji?” Jinyoung questioned.

The youngest takes his first sip and immediately lets out a hissing noise, signaling to Mark that it’s both strong and good. “No, she does, but Jaebeom’s weird staring only made it that much better.”

Mark pushed the other two glasses towards Jinyoung and Jaebeom, “Was she your…” he drifted off, almost as though he was finding it physically difficult to get the word out. Jaebeom can’t help but feel the want to reach his hand out towards Mark and place it comfortingly on his shoulder, but his group of friends don’t do that. Instead, he saves him the trouble by answering back right away, not forcing him to say it.

“No, she wasn’t.”

The bartender nodded slowly, suddenly avoiding his gaze from the three familiar boys across the bar from him, “That’s uh… too bad that she wasn’t able to break the trance. Sorry, Jaebeom.”

He knows that Mark is just trying to be nice, especially when they’re on a subject that he clearly can’t and doesn’t want to talk about, but the attempt to be comforting makes Jaebeom nauseous.

“Well maybe he’ll find her here tonight,” Jinyoung quipped, placing a hand on Jaebeom’s back. Sometimes the latter swore that his friends treated him he had just found out he had a terminal illness.

“I sincerely doubt it,” Jaebeom commented gruffly.

There’s a sound from the other side of the bar from a customer who seems fed up with the conversation being had between the four of them – distracting Mark from serving anyone else. He gives a signal to them to notify them that he’ll be there in a second. “Well… come to me if you guys need more drinks. It’s on me tonight.”

“Thanks, man,” Jaebeom tells him honestly because he might need a couple more drinks before he gets to the state of wanting to be in this room.

Mark said a final word of “see you guys later” and heads to the other end of the bar to help customers who have been waiting. Grabbing their drinks, Jaebeom, Jinyoung, and Bambam turn around to depart the bar, to find somewhere to sit for a bit before the drinks truly begin to hit them.

With his drink in hand, Jaebeom took a sip and reveled in the perfect balance of alcohol to burn his throat and blood to soothe it. The drink was probably the most relaxing part of his day thus far and as he looked out at the crowd, he could already tell that maybe the mixture was going to his head due to his sudden thinking that this place wasn’t all that bad.

Despite not being a club guy, if he were to go out, Jaebeom would always choose this club that Mark works out. To put it simply – it was vampire friendly. With Mark behind the counter and his “secret” supply free-flowing, it became a notoriously known place for vampires in town. If he had to guess, the attendance on an average night was probably evenly split 50/50, humans and vampires.

The humans weren’t aware of the vampires of course – for the most part.

Jaebeom cleared his throat once they’ve found a booth to sit in, “so… Bam what do you know about that girl?”

Both Jinyoung and Bambam exchange glances before looking back at the birthday boy. The latter tried his best to conceal the smile on his face, “not much… just that she owns the café, knows Minji, and is very single.”

For some reason, Jaebeom’s stomach does a little flip, but he wishes it wouldn’t. “S-So?” Through his stutter, he tries to remain as confident as possible, but his friends see right through his façade.

Jinyoung leaned forward until his elbows rest on the top of his thighs, “Jaebeom you can be honest with us… Why the sudden fascination with this girl? Are you sure she didn’t break the trance? Just with the way that you’re acting…” Jinyoung drifted off, not bothering to finish his final sentence, but once again looking at Bambam. It makes Jaebeom lean forward in his seat as well.

“With the way, I’m acting? I’m completely normal. I’m fine. She didn’t break the trance and now I’m just curious about her as curious as anyone would be about someone they meet.”

There’s the silence between the three of them until Bambam speaks up, “You didn’t meet her though.”

It dawns on Jaebeom that he didn’t even speak to you and he wonders why does it feel like he did. Why did it feel like he knew you but didn’t at the same time? Why haven’t his mind and body been cooperating with him since this morning at the café?

Just with the way that you’re acting…

The way he was acting? What did that mean? Was the way he was acting mean something specific?

He feels like he blinks and thirty minutes go by. And in that past thirty minutes, Jaebeom had somehow managed to drink 6 of Mark’s “negronis.” He felt like his head was beginning to get dizzy. It wasn’t often that Jaebeom found himself drunk on the verge of drunkenness due to alcohol not affecting him as much as humans. To even remotely get to that state, he had to drink a lot and it had to be strong.

“You feeling it Jaebeom?” Through the darkness and the haze of the alcohol, Jaebeom could barely make out the hint of the smile playing on Jinyoung’s face. He had switched to a glass of wine at some point while Jaebeom was binge drinking which had to be the most Jinyoung thing ever. Who drinks a glass of wine in a dark, sweaty club?

He’s afraid to answer him verbally which would give his friend an obvious sign of how he was feeling. So instead he just shrugged – as usual.

“Dude let’s get out there!” The youngest shouted, motioning his hands to the middle of the club, “dance… maybe find you a girl?”

Jaebeom watched the people pressing up against each other on the dancefloor, moving their bodies, and drinking like their lives depended on it. He wondered if he wanted to be a part of that. Everyone out there was so full of life and vigor… he just wasn’t. He also didn’t know if he was that drunk, but bless Bambam because he didn’t need alcohol to be out there.

For what feels like the millionth time, his mind drifted to you. Was this your kind of place? Would you come here? If you did would you come alone? With friends? Someone else? You didn’t seem like the type of person who would like this place. You seemed more like him – the observant, calm, inquisitive type who would much rather be at home with a book than at a party.

Then for a moment, he can picture it. It’s almost like he’s in a trance – an image of you curled up on a couch – his couch – under a large white cable knit blanket fills his mind. Rather than reading, your painting with watercolors – the kind that seems to be in every elementary school classroom – and he hears a voice out of view. His voice.

“Painting really?”

Jaebeom sees you glance up from your painting to look at him, smiling.

“Looks like I’m gonna have a lot of time on my hands so… might as well get good at something.”

Jaebeom hears himself laugh, “Okay but watercolors?”

He feels like he’s going to pass out when he finally hears it – your laugh.

“Let the artist work Im Jaebeom! She needs to get good enough to live off auction house money once her paintings get sold! Shh!” Despite your words, you smiled and suddenly moved the tools away from you onto the coffee table. You lifted half the blanket off of you and patted the space of the couch beside you, “you know I can’t say no when you give me that face. Come here.”

And just like that, the vision is gone. Jaebeom feels confused because it didn’t feel like a dream or fantasy, but it felt real… it felt like a memory.

“Hello, Earth to Jaebeom?”

Right… dancing. Maybe dancing would help him forget whatever game his mind was playing on him.

“Yeah let’s fucking go.”

Another instance occurs where Jaebeom blinks and everything moves so fast. Suddenly he’s no longer sat at the table with Bambam and Jinyoung, but instead in the middle of that mess on the dancefloor with everyone else. He almost feels like one of them. He almost feels human again. But as soon as that feeling washes over him, it quickly dissipates.

He knows it must be the drinks doing all the work, because otherwise, he would have never found himself in the middle of all these people, thinking that dancing is a good idea. Dancing had never done anything remotely good for him before, so why now? To help forget? Was it going to help him do that?

“I swear it’s like he’s not even here.”

Jaebeom tuned back into the moment, and it’s when he realizes that Jinyoung and Bambam have been trying to get his attention this entire time.

“Sorry I was just- the alcohol you know…” He says it so quietly that he knows his friends won’t be able to hear him over the music and the millions of conversations happening around them. But he thinks that maybe it’s better that way and that it truly doesn’t matter what he says.

Jinyoung comes closer to Jaebeom, until his mouth is right next to his ear, “we were just asking if there’s anyone that you’re interested in.”

They’re still on this idea? Jaebeom asked himself.

Even in his drunken state, he didn’t think that finding some random girl to fuck was going to help with the emptiness he’s been feeling lately, but for the first time since getting up and onto the dance floor he takes in the people around him. As depressing as it was to observe, most people were here with someone else.

It’s then his gaze falls onto a couple that stands far on the left side of the floor, behind where Jinyoung is standing. The two of them have their fronts pressed up against each other, dancing so closely with arms exploring one another’s bodies. The female has her head resting on the male’s shoulder as if she’s too exhausted to keep going, but can’t dare to part with him. It’s like they’re part of each other and any distance would cause them to lose all sense of themselves.

The girl lifts her head off the male’s shoulder and gives him this look that makes Jaebeom’s heart – if it was still beating – ache. She says something to him and he nodded happily in response. Even through the dim lights and large crowd, Jaebeom could see the sharp teeth inside her mouth.

She placed her head back against his shoulder, this time, however, the male had his head angled back, stretching out his neck. The girl moves in closer until her mouth just ghosts over the skin, breathing on it until the boy shuts his eyes awaiting the sting and pleasure that will come next.

Biting down against his flesh, breaking skin, the girl drinks from her partner. Even though he’s at a distance from them, Jaebeom can tell by the look on the man’s face that he’s enjoying being fed on and that it certainly isn’t his first time.

He feels like his eyes are frozen on the couple. It’s been so long since he fed off someone instead of the stuff that he gets from his connection at the hospital. Jaebeom tries not to think about the way his fingertips tingle and his throat dries up at the thought of drinking from a warm body. The alcohol has only dehydrated him and made him feel even more thirsty – he’s afraid that going back to the bar and asking Mark for a glass of O negative exclusively isn’t going to make that go away.

After a moment or two, the girl removes her mouth from the boy’s neck and drags her tongue over the spot where she had drawn blood from, ultimately covering the wound and signaling that she was done drinking.

He thinks of how risky it is to do that at a place like this. Although half of the people around them also take part in the activity of drinking blooding and granted most of them aren’t paying attention to those around them – there are still unsuspecting humans everywhere. If one wrong person were to see then that could be it for this club being a haven for the vampire community in the city and that would probably be… it for vampires in this city in general.

But who was he kidding? He was being a hypocrite because he’s for sure done the same thing.

You’ve once again entered his mind. However, this time it isn’t an image, picture, or vision that occupies his thoughts, but instead just the idea of how you would react to who he is, what he really is. Throughout his time that he’s been undead he’s only done the “reveal” to a handful of people and even then, it took him a long time to get there. Well except for one person who ultimately was a mistake and his friends hadn’t hesitated to let him know.

With you, Jaebeom felt that you wouldn’t be the kind of person to judge him instantly based on what he was. You would be shocked of course, maybe even scared, but you wouldn’t let that cloud your judgment. You wouldn’t let yourself reject something just because it was unfamiliar.

What the fuck was he on about?

It must be the alcohol doing this to him. He would have to thank Mark for making them strong this time around, but also make a mental note to never let this happen again. Jaebeom was already a deeper thinker, but this was getting out of hand.

There’s a sudden grasp of Jaebeom’s elbow and he feels himself jump at the sudden touch. His eyebrows furrowed when he realized it wasn’t one of his friends considering Bambam and Jinyoung were both dancing over to his right side.

When he turned around to greet the person who had grabbed him, he was disappointed, surprised, and annoyed all in one. It was the last person he had expected to see her, except not really because it made perfect sense.

“Jaebeom… hi.” Ara smiled shyly at him, tucking a string of hair behind her ear and slightly looking down at the ground. He wants to groan because he knows she’s doing this because he had once mentioned that he thought it was hot when she looked innocent. He shouldn’t have ever said that.

He’s not sure what to say, because what are you supposed to say to someone you’ve been trying to avoid for the past year and a half? Jaebeom had said everything he had wanted to say to her.

At one point in his life, he had been stupid. He had been stupid and he had abused the power that had been bestowed upon him since the day he had been turned. Perhaps one would assume that he’d been foolish with his ability just at the start – 100, maybe even 150 years ago. Instead, Jaebeom had gone through a rough patch about a year or two ago.

The overwhelming pressure of finding his mate had started to get to him again. All he needed was someone, anyone to break the hypnotic trance and that was it. A task that seemed so simple, yet never came. So, Jaebeom had used hypnotism to his advantage, getting as many girls as he could in his bed in the shortest amount of time possible. He wasn’t proud of it and it was something he would constantly regret as long as he was ali- around.

One of those girls… had been Ara.

Jaebeom felt relieved when she didn’t wait for him to answer back at her greeting, “How are you? I-It’s your birthday, right? How old are you turning again? 27?” She winked immediately after her question and he wants to roll his eyes.

She was the mistake by the way. The mistake that knew about who he was.

He doesn’t even remember how it happened, how his secret slipped, or what the circumstances of her finding out was. Part of him thinks he was just horny, thirsty, and weak, but she found out and she… loved it.

Weirdly enough, Ara loved the idea of him being a vampire and his “lifestyle” which at first Jaebeom didn’t think too much about. He thought okay she’s taking this extremely well… better than anyone else I’ve ever told, but whatever, but then it became strange.

She was what those in the vampire community call a “vampire fetishizer.”

He coughed awkwardly, his gaze wandering over to Jinyoung and Bambam, hoping they would catch sight of him stuck with Ara and come rescue him. Jaebeom wasn’t that lucky though, not even on his birthday, “Yeah… 27.”

Jaebeom can’t help but look at her neck. It’s fully on display and it was clear that Ara had come here to find someone to feed on her. He had been the one to show Ara this place before he had been clued into her little… vampire obsession.

“Well did the birthday boy get everything he wants today?” She smiled and gave Jaebeom those eyes. He feels his cock twitch in his pants and he realizes he has to keep himself in check because he’s not that weak tonight… right?

His eyes flash to her neck again and Jaebeom feels his throat get even drier. He was so thirsty and he knows Ara would be so willing.

No Jaebeom… No.

“I-I uh yeah… you know got- yeah today’s been good,” he stuttered awkwardly, bringing his tongue out to wet his dry lips. Judging on the look on Ara’s face, she’s taken the action the wrong way.

“You look thirsty Jaebeom… do you want a drink?”

He knows what she means and Jaebeom swallows hard in an attempt to distract himself, to remind himself that he’s not that thirsty. He doesn’t need it that bad.

“I-I think I am.”

The words come out faster than his brain can process to stop them and the part of Jaebeom that’s coherent, sharp, and aware wants to punch the weak and drunk Jaebeom in the face.

Without a word, Ara turned from Jaebeom and began walking to one of the exits at the side of the club. He feels like he’s the one in a trance, mindlessly following her through the people, not even hearing Jinyoung and Bambam calling out to him. The only thing that Jaebeom makes note of as he follows her is Mark’s face behind the bar, giving him a tight smile. It almost stops Jaebeom. Almost.

When they finally get outside through the exit door, they find themselves in a small alley between the club and a dry cleaner.

Jaebeom doesn’t even get a moment to think before Ara is pushing him against the wall of the dry cleaner, her hands roaming up and down his body, her lips going to his own. They’re pressed up against each other so closely that he recalls the couple he had watched earlier. He feels sick comparing this moment now to the two of them.

“Fuck I missed you so much,” Ara sighed seductively into this ear, making Jaebeom’s stomach churn further at her clear longing for him. Well not him, but the vampire part of him.

“Please, I need it,” she mewled. At her words, he almost puts a stop to this whole thing and has to question whether this is the right thing to do. Jaebeom wonders if this is old Jaebeom behavior – the one that just used women and threw them away later like toys, but then he remembers that this is Ara. She’s using him as well.

It’s almost as though that old, cocky, snide Jaebeom appears out of nowhere as he says his next words and brings himself closer to her neck, “do you really need it?”

“Yes, Jaebeom I do, please.” Ara already sounds so desperate and he’s barely done anything. He can’t help but smirk at her reaction.

“Then I guess I better give it to you then.”

He’s about to do it. He’s about to bite down and finally relieve his thirst, his craving, but then he looks to the side of the alley – towards the street. He feels like he’s seeing things again like he’s in the middle of a hallucination or mirage. That thought is pushed away when he locks eyes with you.

“Don’t mind me,” you placed your hands up in front of yourself, to show him you’re not eavesdropping. Your action frustrated you because it would have been much better to say nothing, but you felt yourself panic. The prolonged eye contact with him while he’s just seconds away from pressing down – bitting down? – on the girl’s next for some reason pushed you into defensive mode. Not to mention his eyes… his eyes were – red?

The girl hadn’t noticed you; you aren’t even sure if she heard you, but she certainly noticed Jaebeom’s stare fixated on you. When she faces you, she wears an unpleasant sneer, clearly annoyed by your interruption of whatever this was.

“Can you go?” She said, the agitation in her voice more than apparent.

Rather than immediately leave the scene, you continued to stare at Jaebeom. It’s difficult to say why you decided to walk this specific way home despite it being so late and dark out, but for some reason, you couldn’t help but be pulled in this direction. You weren’t someone who believed in signs or fate, but it felt so wrong to go any other way tonight. That was another thing, you felt this kink in your neck that practically forced you or taunted you into looking down the alley between this dry cleaners and club. It was yet another thing about today that felt unexplainable to you as you certainly weren’t expecting the birthday boy from the café today to be in a compromising position with some girl.

After a moment of more uncomfortable staring – something else that had happened at the café today with him – Jaebeom breaks your gaze and looks down at his feet. The eye roll and acrid look on the girl’s face don’t go unnoticed by you.

You shouldn’t be here.

“S-Sorry. I’ll just get going then,” you concluded, unsure why you felt an uncomfortable sickness spread throughout the entirety of your body.

You barely knew this guy – all you really knew was that today was his birthday and that he was friends with Minji’s boyfriend. Basically nothing. Yet now and even earlier back at the café you had felt this weird sensation within yourself. Not even when you looked at him, but just being in the same presence. It had been so hard to focus on making coffee today when he was seated across the room. Every part of your body just wanted to get closer, gravitate towards him. It was fucking weird… and scary.

The girl nodded as if to signal “yeah about time,” at the announcement of your departure. Jaebeom on the other hand, still had his eyes glued to the ground as if looking at you once again will cause him some kind of pain.

Just as you’re about to continue your trip back home, you stop yourself and look back at the couple in the alley.

“Happy birthday by the way…” you paused wondering if it would be weird to say his name considering he doesn’t even know yours, but you shove the thought out of your mind, “Jaebeom…”

Hearing you say his name causes that tingling feeling in his fingertips to come back and his entire mind is sent into a frenzy. He feels too awkward, too shy to look at you again, but a sudden thought washed over him. What if earlier was a mistake? What if you are his mate? With the way he was currently feeling just at you saying his name, the visions he had in the club and the nonstop place you know had in his mind, it was difficult to believe that you weren’t his mate.

Bambam and Jinyoung had found it difficult to explain to him what it felt like to find your mate, but surely what he felt right now wasn’t normal behavior or feelings. Unless he was a psychopath.

Tightly shutting his eyes and drawing together all his strength, Jaebeom aims to try once again to see if you can break the hypnotic trance, unaffected by his abilities. However, as soon as he’s finally ready, head turned up to face you – you’re gone. You didn’t wait for him to respond to the happy birthday message. Instead, you simply left not wanting to be a burden or troublesome to whatever it was those two were doing in that alley.

“Thank fucking god, let’s get back to it,” Ara concluded with a final roll of her eyes, gripping Jaebeom’s shoulders to get him close to her once again. He stares at her neck, but this time he doesn’t feel anything. He no longer feels thirsty and his appetite is gone.

Jaebeom shrugs her off slightly. The encounter with you has caused him to wake up and realize what a bad idea it would be to do this right now. He hopes that Ara won’t put up a fight – he doesn’t want to have to hypnotize her if he doesn’t need to.

At his actions, Ara takes a step away in disbelief, as if she actually can’t believe that Jaebeom is changing his mind and no longer wants her, “are you serious?”

He doesn’t say anything but instead avoids eye contact with her just as he had done for you.

Snorting, she glared at him, “Fine. Whatever. I don’t fucking care. I can find someone else to feed off of me. Yours never felt that good anyway. Asshole.”

Just like that, she’s out of his life once again and Jaebeom can’t help but feel thankful. He should have never been weak enough to be dragged out by here anyway. He had just been consumed by thoughts of you, alcohol, and the couple on the dancefloor. Then again, not coming out here would have robbed him of the opportunity of seeing you again and finding out that you actually knew his name.

That’s when it dawned on him.

Fuck… how much had you seen? What did you see?

Jaebeom realized that he might have some explaining to do

#got7 fanfic #got7 smut #im jaebeom fanfic #jaebeom fanfic #jaebeom smut

198 notes · View notes

highpope · 4 years

Text

Silver Keys - Ch. One

JJ Maybank x oc / Soulmate AU / Topper x oc

warnings: none, if there are any let me know!

Word Count: 2k ish

Notes: Hi guys, sorry this is so long overdue. I was fighting with this one. But i really wanted to update this story. It’s not my fave but that’s okay. ** As always, reblogs and feedback is welcome and appreciated.

Masterlist - READ PROLOGUE FIRST :))

June sat at the piano she got for her 16th birthday. She had been saving up for years and finally had enough money for a keyboard. It wasn’t the same as the beautiful grand piano at her instructors, but it did the job. June nervously watched the clock tick down to midnight and tried to focus on the song she was trying to learn. If she came into lessons next week without having learned at least half of it she wouldn’t be on track to play at the recital in a few weeks. It was a big deal to her parents, and June too. The recital was on the mainland with tons of different kids from the surrounding areas. June had never gotten an opportunity to play and she wasn’t about to let worrying about her potential soulmate stop her.

She took a deep breath and began to play. As the minutes turned to seconds, June was gracefully gliding her fingers up and down the keyboard, trying to make sense of the melodies, allowing the notes to soak into the room.

On the morning of her birthday, June walked down the stairs into the kitchen to see a note and a box of donuts. It was Saturday, meaning both her parents were working and Olivia, her sister, was going to be sleeping the day away. June grabbed a powder sugar donut from the box and read the note:

Happy Birthday, Love! We can’t wait to celebrate with you tonight.

Have fun today, Mom and Dad

She smiles and folds the note up. June was just about to grab another donut when the doorbell rang. She looked at the time, 9:30. There’s no way any family member would be stopping by and Olivia’s friends wouldn’t show up unannounced. June opens the door to reveal JJ dressed in shorts and a light long sleeve t-shirt.

“Happy birthday Ju Ju!” JJ exclaims.

June rolled her eyes, “God, please don’t call me that.” She opened the door wide to let him in. The nickname originated from June’s younger sister. They were five years apart and she couldn’t properly say June’s name for quite a while. So from ages 5 to 8, she was Ju Ju.

“Nah, I think 18 is the year we bring it back,” JJ said, slinging his arm around her shoulders.

“Absolutely not,” June says, tapping his cheek lightly, “Thanks though.” He smiles as she jumps up onto one of the stools in the kitchen, “what’s up?”

“You, miss birthday girl, have very important places to be. Go get dressed.”

“Where exactly do I have to be?”

“Well, first, Kie’s and then,” JJ motions like he is zipping his lips and throwing the key away. June narrows her eyes causing him to throw up his hands in defense.

“Okay, fine, but don’t eat my donuts!” June runs up the stairs and begins to get ready. She decides on a blue tube top, shorts, and a white cropped jacket. She runs a brush through her hair and packs her swimsuit and a few other things in a drawstring before going down the hallway to leave a note for her sister. She tells her where she’s going to be and to call when she gets up.

JJ and her drive to Kiara’a in his truck, the windows down and the radio stuck on the same channel it’s been on since he got it. They’ve learned to tolerate it. JJ was so proud of the truck when he first showed the pogues. He had gotten a busted down pickup from some guy on the island and fixed it up pretty much by himself. The rest of them promised to never make fun of it.

“Happy Birthday!” The pogues yell when June opens the door. She can’t contain her laughter. Everyone is wearing pink sparkly party hats. Kie instantly comes over to her, throwing her arms around her neck, “baby is eighteen!” June squeezes back and accepts a hat identical to the rest and hands one to JJ who shuts the door behind them.

“Looking good, boys.” June laughs at Pope and John B posing in their hats.

“It’s the required attire didn’t you hear?” John B asks, kissing the top of June's head and Pope slinging an arm around her shoulders. They lead her through the kitchen and the sliding door to the outdoor patio. The lounge chairs are set up along with string lights and a birthday banner. It was perfect. The whole thing, being with her favorite people, the perfect weather.

“You guys didn’t have to do all of this.”

“But you deserve it. You’re always the first to do anything for the rest of us,” Pope says.

“He’s right, Juney,” Kie says, smiling.

“You’re a bunch of saps,” JJ says plopping into a chair.

After spending the morning and early afternoon hanging out in Kie’s backyard, the five piled into the van and headed down to the beach. The boys were in the water before June could even set her stuff down. It was arguably not warm enough to swim, but that didn’t stop them. Kie and June decided to layout, occasionally sneaking a few drinks from the water bottle filled with alcohol.

“So how are you feeling about the whole soulmate thing?” Kie asks, bumping her shoulder against June’s.

To be honest, June had forgotten all about it. She could barely sleep last night she was so nervous, but now that it could happen whenever, she felt much better.

“Honestly okay.” She admitted.

“Do you think you already know who it is?”

“I mean that happens more often than not, right? Just look at our parents.” Kie’s parents had known each other in high school, having grown up on the island, but didn’t know they were soulmates until later down the line. That happens all the time. Whether or not it’s just coincidence or really is fate, June hadn’t decided yet.

“I guess you’re right.” She paused before speaking again, “I don’t think I want to already know them. I don’t want to marry someone we went to high school with and be stuck here only for our kids to end up the same way.” Seeing Kiara open up like this made June wonder about her own future.

“Don’t worry Kie, you’re gonna go somewhere cool like Australia and stop the wildfires and clean the oceans and fall in love with some really hot girl and leave us all behind forever.”

She moved her sunglasses off her face to hold back her hair, “I could never leave you, but you really think so?”

“Of course. You’re going places. John B, JJ, and I are gonna be stuck here smelling like fish bait until we’re 80.” June gags.

Kiara laughs, making a disgusted face, “what about Pope?”

“Nah, he’s too good for this place.” They both laugh so hard they don’t even notice the boys had made their way back to where they were laying.

“What’s so funny?” John B asks, shaking out his hair.

“Nothing,” Kie says with a smile on her lips. The boys share a knowing look before dropping it altogether. That’s when June’s phone chimes with a message from her sister.

Mom said to make sure you were home soon for tonight. We’re almost all set up here.

I guess Aunt Morrane is coming:/

“No,” June groans at the last of Olivia’s message.

“What’s wrong?” JJ asks, sitting down next to her.

“My Aunt is coming to dinner tonight.”

“The horror!” John B mocks.

“Stop! I’m serious. She’s a nutcase.” June replies, throwing a towel at his face. He catches it in one swift motion.

“Ju it’s gonna be fine.” JJ said reassuringly, “I’ll drop you back off.”

The pogues only stayed a little while longer before packing up their stuff into the van and parting ways once back at Kiara’s.

“I won’t have any fun without you,” Kie begged before June got into the truck.

“You’re gonna be fine.” The rest of the group was going to the first official kegger of the summer. June always missed it. She was sure she would hear all about it tomorrow when she would stop by the chateau with a bunch of water and ibuprofen in the morning to make sure they were all breathing.

“Hey, thanks, J,” June says when JJ had pulled up in front of her house.

“No problem,” he starts. June reaches for the door handle, “actually, I got you something.”

Surprised, June says “You didn’t have to get me anything.”

He waves her off and reaches into the glove compartment, pulling out a bracelet, “uh. It’s not wrapped or anything.”

June examines the bracelet, it was a brown braided string with a single pearl threaded in the middle.

“I love it.”

“Really?” JJ asks, scrunching up his nose, “because it’s okay if you don’t I just thought-”

“No, no I do. Thank you,” June says and reaches up to kiss his cheek. Just then there is a loud pounding coming from the passenger side window, causing June to startle and drop the bracelet. Both June and JJ lean in to grab it off the floor of the car and smack heads. “Shit, sorry”

“Ow!”

JJ finally grabs the bracelet and hands it back to her before they are both faced with Aunt Morrane opening the door and practically dragging her out of the truck.

“You know,” her aunt starts, “darling, everyone is waiting inside.”

“I’ll just be one second, I promise.” She says flashing a smile to her aunt and pleading eyes to JJ. He tries to hide his laughter.

Aunt Morrane locks arms with June and begins walking up to their sidewalk, quite literally dragging her by her feet, and begins talking about this show she was watching.

“Happy Birthday, Ju Ju!” JJ yells from the truck. June tries to flip him off as discreetly as possible with her aunt still gripping on to her.

At the door, her mother engulfs her into a hug, “Happy 18th, love.”

“Thank you, mama.”

“Was that JJ? You know he could've come in. We have enough food.”

“It’s okay, Mama, he had plans.” That satisfied her enough as she went to close the door and straight back into the kitchen. June took off her shoes and that’s when she heard it. It only lasted a minute and she couldn’t recite it if she was asked, but it was there. Faint, but clear. Just how Pope had described it. Just how everyone had described it. Her soulmate.

taglist: @allycat449-blog @ifilwtmfc (hi im sorry I forgot to tag yall)

** if you want to be added to the taglist let me know!!

#highpope #highpopefics #silverkeys #silverkeys masterlist #jj maybank x oc #jj maybank #jj maybank x reader #obx #obx fic #outer banks #outer banks fluff #soulmate #soulmate au #outerbanks #fluff #slowburn

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lenniewip · 4 years

Text

Unknown (A Sterek Wrong Number/Celebrity AU)

11.09 PM Unknown Number

>I’m writing songs about you again.

11.20 PM Unknown Number

>its stiles btw.

>in case you deleted my number

>I did.

>I mean I deleted yours.

>but I still remember it apparently

11:41 PM Unknown Number

>I only have 2 lines so far

11:57 PM Unknown Number

>I bleed you from my veins.

>I grieve you like I love you.

>alone.

>its better with the chords.

>u were always better at writing lyrics than me

12:34 AM Unknown Number

>u were better everything than me

2:00 AM Unknown Number

>I hate that I miss you

2:07 AM Unknown Number

>do u want to hook up?

>I promise not to propose again

2:15 AM Unknown Number

>im sorry.

>ignore me.

>im drinking

Derek blinked bleary eyes. His phone screen was the only source of light in his room, as he read through the flurry text messages.

What the hell is a Stiles?

2:17 AM Unknown Number

<I think you have the wrong number

>Lydia?

<no

>oh thank fuck

>I mean

>I’m sorry

>for disturbing ur sleep

>but im just glad I didn’t drunk text my ex all of this

>bullet dodged right?

>is this what near death experiences feel like?

<I wouldn’t know.

>of course

>hey

>seeming as I have you here can I ask you a quick q?

>all my friends are asleep

<probably because its 3am

<everyone’s asleep

>2.39

>and ur not

>asleep that is

>so?

>I’ll take your silence as a go ahead

>what do you think?

>of the lyrics

<im the wrong person to ask

>never experienced heartbreak?

<no

<all song lyrics just look like bad poetry to me

>oh

>yeah I guess it does

>not everyone can be Rupi Kaur tho right?

<do you want to be rupi kaur?

>sure

>not to be dramatic or anything

>but

>I want to be anyone but me

>think id rather be someone like regina spektor tho

<regina spektor?

>singer/song writer

>shes my fucking inspiration

>her lyrics are like poetry to me

>you should listen to her music

<I dont really listen to music

>what the fuck?

>are you an alien?

<no?

>nice fucking try ET

>thats exactly what an alien would say

<…you got me there

>akdjfen

>is this you admitting I was right?

<no

<but this is me going to bed

<because its now 4AM

>already?

>fuck

>ive got an early start tomorrow

>good night random stranger

>and thanks

>for listening

>or reading ig

<good night

“You’re late.” Laura frowned, arms crossed.

“Are you going to let me in?” Derek grumbled, still feeling the affects of having stayed up until 4AM the previous night.

Laura didn’t argue she just stepped aside to let him through into her flat. “You’re grumpier than usual.” She noted.

“Didn’t sleep well.”

Derek hated the look she gave him then.

The look that said he was broken. The look that said she wanted to fix him.

“Is…Is it the nightmares again?” Laura’s voice dipped to a whisper, like the question alone would be enough to send him over the edge.

“No.”

An awkward silence defended over the two of them, neither knowing what to say.

Derek clung to the silence like a blanket, wishing things could go back to how they used to be. Back to when they knew how to speak to one another.

But this was enough.

It was enough to know that they were both trying. Failing. But trying.

2:40 PM Laura

>I’m here if you need to talk.

Derek isn’t good at art, but sometimes it’s the only way he can express himself. Words had never been his forte.

So instead he doodles.

Shitty toddler level doodles that he never shows anyone.

Sometimes he thinks if he could bring himself to show Laura she would like it. Maybe she would even understand it.

But there was a bigger chance that she wouldn’t, and he would feel even more like a stranger to his own sister than he already was.

10:18 PM Unknown Number

>I don’t remember it anymore

<You have the wrong number again

>No

>This is ‘not Lydia’ right?

<right

>So here’s the thing.

>I always thought if I needed to text her I could

>And I thought maybe I got her number wrong because I was drunk

>But I can’t remember it anymore

<Oh.

>I have some of her things still

>I don’t think I’ll ever get to return it now

>Unless she messages me first

<When did you two break up?

>Last year

>and I know what you’re thinking

>’it’s October’

>and I should be over her by now

>Trust me I know

>So you don’t need to lecture me

<I wasn’t going to

>Oh

<Stiles?

>That’s weird

<what is?

>I forgot I told you my name

<You should throw away the stuff she left behind.

>you’re right

>I don’t like it.

>but you’re right

>…thanks

<What for?

>for listening

>reading**

>my friends are pretty sick of hearing me complain

>so this is nice

<sure

<anytime

>dope

>no take backsies

<am I going to regret this?

>for definite

>you’re stuck with me now

That night Derek saves Stiles’ number as ‘Bad Poet’.

Stiles keeps messaging after that.

Stiles messages like they’ve been friends for years, and Derek very determinedly does not analyse why it is he always responds.

Even when there are messages dated from Laura from three days ago that he hasn’t even been able to bring himself to open yet.

He also ignores how when he’s messaging Stiles the gaping pit that had made residence in his chest feels just a little less inescapable.

Derek can’t bring himself to tell Stiles his name. He can’t bring himself open up, even though there’s a large part of him that wants to.

He’s not above admitting he’s scared.

Derek draws Stiles sometimes.

More accurately he draws a vague pair hands texting on a phone, because he has no idea what Stiles actually looks like.

Derek refuses to let himself dwell on that though, because they are happy drawings.

The pictures of Stiles are pretty much his only happy drawings right now.

They don’t always talk about Lydia.

Sometimes Stiles messages Derek song lyrics he’s working on.

Other times it’s memes, or just a bunch of emojis.

Once Stiles had just messaged him what Derek could only assume was a list of everything he had eaten that day.

Sometimes Stiles messages in rambles - and Derek can’t always keep up with the boy’s run away thoughts, but even then he never feels lost the way he does when he’s trying to interact with literally anyone else.

And sometimes it’s 2AM. Those are simultaneously Derek’s favourite and least favourite texts.

2:02 AM Bad Poet

>sometimes I feel like too much

>and too little

>at the same time

>u ever feel like that ET?

<not really

>its like I’m infinite, and meaningless

>like a never ending echo

>or a recurring decimal

>I just stretch on and on forever but theres no point to it

>I have no depth

<youre not meaningless

<you’re a rhythm.

<like breathing

>…

>was that a regina spektor reference?

<it might have been

>I thought you didn’t listen to music?

<well someone said her lyrics were like poetry

<so I thought I would check out a few songs

>well fuck

>what did you think?

<she’s good

>you spelt ‘amazing’ wrong

<I still prefer poetry

>of course you do

Derek stared at the texts an ache filling his chest.

Derek was the opposite of infinite. Everything he touched turned to flames.

10:30AM Bad Poet

<my sister bought me flower seeds

>I didn’t know you had a sister?

<she’s everything I have

>oh

<and I think she’s trying to trick me into therapy somehow

>…with flower seeds?

<yes

>you sound extremely paranoid

>maybe therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you?

<shut up

>noted.

>keep me posted on how your gardening goes

>also

>as a side note

>you know you have me too right?

>if you ever need to talk or anything, I’m right here for you

<thanks

>anytime

On Derek’s birthday Laura insists the two of them spend the day together, and Derek knows better than to argue.

She buys him a cake and they spend hours sat next to one another silently. Two strangers desperately trying to keep hold of one another but with an ocean dividing them.

Once their family had been so alive.

And it was all Derek’s fault that was gone.

They both knew it.

Sometimes Derek wondered if Laura hated him as much as he did.

He was too scared to ask.

That night Derek chased the ache in his chest away with a drink.

And then several more followed.

1:14 AM Bad Poet

<seh haars me

>sorry bud, you’re going to have to try again

>try spell checking before hitting send

<she.hates mee

>who?

<larn

>are you drunk?

<yeh

<tyongs ndrf

*Out Going Call: Bad Poet*

The phone rings twice before being picked up. “Sorry. Stupid keyboard is so small. Impossible to type.” Derek mumbled, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being pressed into the sofa cushion.

“Wow. You’re really sloshed huh?”

“No.” Derek denied. “Just tipsy.”

“Right. So what was it you were trying to tell me? Someone hates you?”

“Laura.”

“Who’s Laura?”

“My sister.”

“Oh.”

“She looks at me like she wishes she could fix me.”

“That doesn’t sound like she hates you, bud.”

“She should. I can’t be fixed.”

“You’re right, because you’re not broken.”

Hearing Stiles say that Derek could almost believe it to be true.

“I mean it. You’re not broken. You’re just a different shape than you used to be. But the shape you are now is beautiful.”

Derek closes his eyes and lets the words wash over him. “Do you sing?” He finds himself asking.

“What?”

“I know you write songs, but do you ever sing?”

“Oh…” Stiles sounds uncomfortable. “I guess… Yeah. I do.”

Derek hummed in the back of his throat. “I bet you have a nice voice.”

“Th-thanks.”

Derek tried to say something else, but all that comes out is a yawn, which makes Stiles let out a jittery laugh.

Derek tries to memorise the sound of It, but it’s so fleeting, it’s already slipping away from him.

“I think you need to go sleep, ET.”

“Yeah.” Derek agrees.

“Goodnight bud.”

“Wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you stay on the phone? Just for a bit longer.” Derek clutched on to the phone like if he could grip tightly enough it would make Stiles stay.

I don’t want to be alone. The words die on Derek’s tongue.

“Sure.” Stiles didn’t hesitate. “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Sleep pulled at Derek’s consciousness, unravelling his grip on reality.

“Stiles?”

Stiles hummed in answer.

“Your shape is beautiful too.”

A small whimper came from the other end of the phone. “Thanks.”

7:50 AM Bad Poet

>how are you feeling today?

<better

>good <3

Derek holds his phone tightly and wishes that he had more to say. Just to keep the conversation going.

He also wishes (not for the first time) that Stiles was more than a faceless entity on the other end of the phone.

But it’s the first time he feels the want like a physical ache in his chest.

Derek had never been good with words, but if Stiles was here in front of him Derek would probably give him a hug.

But everything Derek touches eventually dies, and a larger part of him is relieved for the distance.

Derek plants the seeds his sister got him that day.

9:48 PM Bad Poet

>would it totally weird you out if I wanted to do another phone call?

>don’t feel like you need to say yes

>I just enjoyed talking to you

>and hearing your voice

>ugh.

>why are words so hard?

<I wouldn’t be opposed to a phone call

*Incoming Call: Bad Poet*

“Hey.” Derek feels breathless as he answers the phone, anxious excitement clawing it’s way up his throat.

“Hey.” Stiles sounds equally out of breath, and that helps.

Derek chews on his lip, scrambling for something to say. “What did you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know.” Stiles admitted. “Anything.”

“Helpful.” Derek said sarcastically.

“I mean. There’s one thing. I didn’t want to ask when you were drunk because it felt a little like taking advantage. And I don’t want you to think you have to answer-”

“Stiles.” Derek interrupts before Stiles could break into a full blown ramble.

“Tell me your name.” Stiles breaks. “Please.”

Anxiety grips his heart. But… he couldn’t stay scared forever.

“It’s Derek.”

“Derek.” Stiles repeats his name in a reverent whisper, as if committing it to memory.

And hearing Stiles say his name makes everything worth it.

Phone calls become a regular thing between the two of them over the next month. Always between late in the evening and the early hours of the day.

The next time Derek spirals he doesn’t drink before he calls Stiles, but he does cry on the phone.

The next morning he wakes up to a text from Stiles.

6:42 AM Bad Poet

>you need to talk to your sister

And Derek knows he’s right.

It’s not easy confronting Laura. He has two separate anxiety attacks on the walk to her apartment alone.

But he forces himself to take the dive.

“It’s okay if you hate me.” He tells her, even though it’s not okay. Laura’s hate might be the only thing in the world that could break him beyond repair.

Laura looks horrified as she stares at him. “I don’t- Obviously I don’t hate you Derek.”

“It’s my fault that they’re gone.” Derek addresses the elephant in the room.

If he hadn’t fallen in love with Kate.

If he hadn’t broken up with her, just to try and prove a point when she refused to say ‘I love you’ back…

There never would have been a fire.

Their family would still be here if it wasn’t for him.

“Fuck that!” Laura let out a harsh noise. “Derek, none of this was ever your fault. You were a kid, and even if you weren’t… You never set the fire.”

“I might as well have.”

“No. If anyone… I was your big sister- am your big sister. But I was so fucking wrapped up in myself. I didn’t even know about Kate.”

The last time Derek had seen Laura cry it had been at the funeral, so it took a second to fully sink in what he was seeing.

He found himself crying to.

“I’m so sorry, Der.”

Derek stumbled forwards pulling Laura into a crushing hug. Laura hugs him back just as tight.

They spend hours refusing to let go of one another.

He realises he fell asleep on Laura’s sofa when he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. But he had no idea where it was, and he was too tired to move.

He feels Laura moving and the sound of the phone ringing gets louder before cutting off abruptly.

“Hello?”

“No - Derek’s asleep.”

“Maybe call at a more reasonable time?”

“Who is this?”

“Your voice sounds familiar.”

“Right.”

“Okay. Bye.”

Derek let sleep over take him once more.

2:29 AM Bad Poet

>sorry for calling so late

>you’re asleep so I’ll just take to you tomorrow

9:07 AM Bad Poet

<sorry, I was really tried

>no worries man

>you’re allowed to have a life outside of me

<was something wrong?

>no I was just bored, and didn’t realise how late it had gotten

>im fine

>how are you?

<im good actually

<I spoke to Laura

>yeah?

>I’m proud of you

>how’d that go?

<we both cried

<a lot

<and I ended up falling asleep on her couch

>look at you, opening up and shit.

>think I might cry now

<shut up

>literally never

>better men have tried and failed to silence me

2:40 PM Laura

>Want to see a movie on Friday?

<sure

One night Stiles calls Derek just to say his name in stupid ways, and laugh himself stupid after each one.

“Duhreek.”

“Doreck.”

“Fuck. I’m getting a stitch from laughing.”

“You’re so fucking dumb.” Derek is smiling as he said it.

“Deeruk.” Stiles wheezes out.

Derek just closes hie eyes and listens.

“I’m so fucking glad I know you, Stiles.” The words fall out of Derek’s mouth without much thought.

He only realises the weight of his words when Stile’s laughter pulls to a stop.

“I uh-” Stiles stammered. “Me too. Fuck. You’re the best thing to happen to me in…so fucking long. I’m glad I know you too Derek.”

Derek finally admits to himself that night that he’d fallen at least a little in love with the stranger from the unknown number.

He keeps trying to draw Stiles, but he can’t. Vague shapes just don’t cut it anymore.

He wants to map Stiles out with his eyes and translate it onto the page.

He wants to be able to see the smile behind the laughter.

He wants.

1:58 AM Bad Poet

>do you think you day we’ll actually meet?

>maybe not intentionally

>maybe one day we’d pass each other in the streets and not even know

>maybe we already have

Derek couldn’t imagine a scenario where he wouldn’t notice Stiles.

<is there ever a moment when you’re not talking?

<I think id recognise your voice and know it was you

>maybe your face would make me speechless ;)

<I think id still know

<but if you want to be sure… I could send you a picture?

<of me

>dkfajd

>for reals?

>you would do that?

>you?

<well…not for free

>there’s always a catch

>what do you want?

>my soul?

>a blood debt?

>you can have whatever it is

<I meant you’d have to send me a picture too

<geez stiles

The next text takes an unnervingly long time to come through.

>I could do that

>a photo for a photo

>I kind of look like shit rn

>so no judging me

Derek spends the next two minutes fussing and fidgeting to take a good photo. No matter what angle he took it from the bags under his eyes were noticeable, and so was the week’s worth of stubble he had yet to shave off.

And maybe this was a terrible, awful, idea.

But Derek would send one hundred bad pictures if it meant getting to see one of Stiles.

He forced himself to press send on the last picture he took.

As he pressed send another photo came in.

Derek’s fingers shook as he hit the button to download the image.

His heart stopped.

Stiles was beautiful in every sense of the word, and Derek found himself unable to look away. Even when he heard the small dings of incoming messages.

But he couldn’t ignore them for long, because it was Stiles. And when ever Stiles messaged Derek had to answer.

>Fucking hell

>are you for real?

>you gave me a heart attack

>am I being catfished right now?

>when do you think you were going to tell me you’re the most fucking beautiful man to exist ever?

>how the hell to you look like that as 2AM!?

>Derek

>oh my god

>you gotta respond my dude because I’m freaking out a little bit

>still there?

>did my selfie scare you away?

>I would have tried harder for a nice photo if I knew I was talking to an adonis

>Derek?

<still here

>of thank fuck

>so…

<so?

>come on

>your going to give me a complex

>the selfie…was it okay?

>I know it’s not much

>but we can’t all be greek gods

<its beautiful

<you’re beautiful, stiles

>oh

>thanks

Derek is so far gone that he makes the picture of Stiles the home screen on his phone.

9:49 AM Bad Poet

<Laura wants me to meet her boyfriend

<this is all your fault

>how is this my fault?

<because she never wanted to introduce us before

<and then you got me to talk to my sister

<and now she wants me to meet him

>…and this is a bad thing?

<yes

>because?

<I don’t make good first impressions

<it’s going to be awkward

>yeah probably

<you’re not helpful

>I wasn’t trying to be ;)

>have fun, Derek!

Meeting Laura’s boyfriend wasn’t as awkward as Derek thought it was going to be. But it was strange.

Derek hadn’t been expecting to meet someone so soft and kind. He was nothing like any one that Laura had dated before.

But he also wasn’t used to seeing Laura smile as much as she did around him.

Maybe not all change was bad.

Derek tells Laura about Stiles by accident. Or more accurately he mentions Stiles once by accident (not even by name) and Laura had badgered him until he admitted that he had made a friend through a wrong number.

“There’s a lot of weirdos out there.”

“I know.”

God did Derek ever know.

But Stiles is different.

“Just…be careful.”

“I am being. I promise.”

Laura reluctantly lets it go after that. “So…what’s he like?”

“He’s…he’s like bad poetry.”

“Oh god. You’re in love with him aren’t you?”

Derek can’t bring himself to deny it, but he does tell Laura to shut up.

Derek fully embraces being in love with Stiles on the day he tells Stiles about his drawings. He’d never told anyone about them before - not even Laura. But telling Stiles had been easy.

‘It reminds me of line art’ Stiles had said when Derek had sent him a photo of the doodle he had been working on. “I love it’.

A warmth flutters through Derek’s veins.

It all goes sideways on the day Laura goes on Derek’s phone to check the time.

She’d raised one eyebrow at him looking amused.

“I thought you didn’t listen to music?” She said, a teasing note to her voice.

“I don’t.” Derek shrugged.

“A huh. So why do you have a picture of Stiles Stilinski as your wallpaper?” She asks.

It’s so startling to hear Stiles name coming out of Laura’s mouth that Derek’s brain refuses to function properly. “How do you know Stiles?” He asks weakly.

Laura laughs. “He’s not exactly a niche celebrity Der. He was a really famous YouTuber before he started selling albums.”

Derek doesn’t know what to say to that. He blinks as his world slowly unravels before him.

No.

She had to be wrong, because Derek couldn’t be in love with a celebrity. Stiles couldn’t be…

“Hey are you okay? You look really sick?”

“He’s famous?” His throat is dry.

“Yes? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’ve got to speak to me Der. Use your words.”

Derek just shakes his head because he can’t.

“It’s him.” He manages to get out.

“What are you talking about?”

“Laura. It’s him.”

It takes a moment to click but Derek knows when it does because a look of thunderous wrath takes over Laura’s face.

“I’ll kill him.” She seethes, shaking with anger. “What kind of fucking punk thinks that this is a good prank to play?”

“What?”

“No one is getting away with catfishing you, Der. I’m going to hunt this fucker down, and then I’ll rip him so many new ones that he going to look like SpongeBob when I’m done with him.”

And god, Derek hadn’t even considered the thought that Stiles might not even be Stiles. The thought of Stiles being a liar…

The gape in his heart grows a little bit bigger.

And it all falls apart.

It takes hours before Derek can convince himself to confront Stiles.

11:08 PM Bad Poet

<you’re stiles stilinki

>fuck

(And yeah, it was really him).

>how did you find out?

<Laura

>I was going to tell you

<Were you?

>Yes

>I’ve wanted to for ages

>It just never felt like the right time to bring it up

<I wish you had decided on the right time was sooner

>Me too

>I’m sorry

>Please don’t hate me

Derek did not think it was possible for him to hate any part of Stiles.

<I don’t

>Thank fuck

>seriously

>can I call you?

<sure

Derek closed his eyes after sending the text and waited for Stiles to ring. A heartbeat later his ringtone sounded off.

“Hey.”

“You believe me right?” And Stiles sounds more frantic than Derek had ever heard him before.

“I believe you, Stiles.”

“Are you sure, because I can prove it if you want? I can do a video call? Or I can tweet literally anythi-”

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”

Stiles lets out a small whine, that reaches through the phone line and yanks at Derek’s already tattered heart, unraveling him just a little more.

“Meet me.” Stiles said, taking Derek by surprise.

“What?”

“Please. I meant to throw a please in there, I’m just really fucking nervous right now. Meet me please. In real life. I uh- I was going to ask when I finally told you about the whole being a celebrity thing. It’s still weird to say that out loud. That’s part of why it was so hard to tell you. But the point was you beat me to the punch with the whole reveal thing, but I still wanted to ask.”

“Stiles…”

“And it’s not that I was trying to use my influence or fame to pressure you into meeting me. I just wanted to be in a space where we were one hundred per cent honest with one another before I asked you. You can still say no. Of course you can, I don’t know why I’m- my point is I hope you don’t say no.”

Derek feels his heart break in two.

“Stiles…I can’t.”

“Oh.”

He hadn’t fully realised just how many worlds apart the two of them were when he had fallen in love with Stiles. It felt even more impossible than it had before.

“I’m sorry.” The words leave him feeling hollow.

“No. Don’t apologise. This is just me getting carried away. It’s okay.”

I love you. The words never leave Derek. They can’t leave him.

There was no way this could work, and he was far too scared of breaking the tentative connection they had with his useless words.

It was better for him to just… fall out of love.

6:17AM Laura

<it’s really him

>are you sure

<I’m sure

>what are you going to do?

<nothing

>Derek you’re in love with him

<I’m aware

<it doesn’t matter

<it wouldn’t ever work

>I’m sorry

<don’t be

<I’m going to be fine

>Im coming over with wine

That night Derek fills pages and pages of his notebook with drawings of Stiles.

When he gets a message from Stiles at 11PM- for the first time since they started messaging- Derek leaves it unopened.

He never ignores a message again after that, and life moves on. Stiles still messages him all the time, but he never asks to call anymore.

Derek misses his voice so much that he goes onto youtube and listens to his music.

He buys all three albums Stiles released and it still doesn’t feel like enough.

He fills an entire notebook with doodles of Stiles.

It’s still not enough.

1:11 PM Bad Poet

>I wrote you a song

>I know you don’t listen to music

>but it felt weird to not a least send you a link

>bad poetry at 2:00am

The link leads Derek to a youtube video of Stiles holding a ukulele and staring with a soft smile at the camera.

“Hey guys. It’s been a while, huh? But I guess I finally found inspiration. So here we go.”

The song is beautiful, but even more beautiful than that was Stiles.

When the song reached the end Derek doesn’t hesitate to hit replay.

He listens to the song ten times before he realises he’s crying - and he knows that he’s never going to ‘get over’ Stiles because he doesn’t want to.

3:00 PM Laura

>have you seen the video?

<he sent me a link

<he wrote a song for me Laura

<I love him so fucking much and he wrote a song for me

>fuck

<what do I do?

>what do you want to do?

<I don’t know

>I think you should look at his twitter

>I wasn’t going to say anything because you said you wanted to get over him

>but I think you need to see it

>@stilesstilinki

@stilesstilinski

I want to hug him

@stilesstilinski

Get you a guy that will stay up with you until 4AM talking about literally anything

@stilesstilinski

Why do I alway fall for people so far out of my league? rip me I guess.

@stilesstilinski

He makes me want to write poetry

Derek spends hours scrolling through Stiles’ twitter.

He scrolls far enough back that he gets to the part of his timeline where his twitter is littered with pictures of Lydia, which causes the ache in Derek’s chest to grow. But he can’t stop looking because Stiles looks so happy.

And Derek falls impossibly more in love.

He lets himself acknowledge for the first time that Stiles might love him back.

And everything else?

It’s worth it.

Because Stiles is worth everything to Derek.

2:00 AM Bad Poet

<so I looked at your twitter

>fuck.

>how much did you see?

<all of it

>tight

>please excuse me while I go die now

>bye

<don’t leave yet

<I had something I wanted to ask you

>did you want me to delete the tweets?

>I can do that

>I’ll just delete the whole account

>I am my own worst enemy so this won’t be a problem

>actually Jackson Whittemore is my worst enemy

>but I’m a close second

<stiles?

>yup?

<Will you go on a date with me?

>alkdjf

>yes?

>Ofc yes?

>are you being serious?

>because this would be a cruel prank if you’re not serious

<I’m serious

>yes.

>yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. yes.

>holy shit

>theres no fucking universe where I say ‘no’ to that question from you

>im so fucking in love with you

>is it too soon to say that?

>I don’t even care

>I’m speaking my truth

>you obviously don’t have to say it back

>im going to woo you so hard Derek

>you’ll have to love me back eventually

>I’m going to write you poetry

>hell I’ll even read poetry for you

>ill give the whole fucking moon to you

<why would I want the moon?

<im not gru?

>despicable me

>that was a despicable me reference.

>you don’t listen to music, but you watch despicable me?

>you’re such an enigma to me Derek

>god I love you so much

<stiles?

>too much?

<no

<I don’t think I could ever have too much of you

<I love you too stiles

<so much

<I just don’t want you to get your hopes up

<I might not be able to live up to it in real life

>impossible

<seriously stiles

>I am being serious

>I’m already in love with you Der

>you don’t have to do anything more than you’ve already done

>you could wear a potato sack, and spend the whole night not saying anything at all

>and I would still be in love with you

>all you have to do now is show up

<…I can do that

>perfect

TWO YEARS LATER

@stilesstilinski

Hey @JacksonWhittemore, remember when you told me I would die alone? Well I just got engaged to the love of my life. So checkmate fucker.

#sterek #eternal sterek #what am i even doing?#i just spent the last two days writing this and banging my head against the wall and nothing else #should i write this into a full fic one day?#i probably wont #hope you guys enjoy #sterek drabble #5k words of them being idiots #i cut so much out how is this still 5k?#stiles stilinki #derek hale #laura is the only other character that makes an appearance #im supposed to be sleeping #but here we are ig #texting #wrong number #celebrity stiles

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unravelling-the-world · 3 years

Text

random thoughts related to kagepro (tw for depression?? death?? suicide ?? implied ?? im not sure and idk what else read at ur own risk)

well idk lately ive been thinking a lot and ik ive uh always (? since i can remember?) have been depressed (i mean...it started around age 12...i dont really remember much before that. most of what i remember are bad moments anyways. or very specific scenes. but they dont feel mine. if that makes sense. its like remembering the scene from a movie. back on track i guess idk well lately ive realized i actually kin some characters and lately ive...been relating a lot to shintaro kisaragi fromkagepro. i mean its ok. there´s always been that specific similarity in us (after all, how many characters in anime are as related to coca cola as shintaro //and me,,im literally a coca cola addict lmao// well anyways. after some days, this lead me to thinking...to a hidden memory within my brain, i guess. I remember introducing my then best friends, to kagepro. one told me haha he´s like u bc the coca cola!! and i think i just laughed and smiled? i truly didn´t see it? i was sad sure, but i couldnt really relate to him. after all, i was the leader of my own little group of 12 year old weebs,right? (i was also 12 btw) i didnt personally dislike shintaro but i didnt rly see myself in him yknow? also i have loved ayano from ever since i have memory so idk like she´s one of my biggest comfort characters and its weird bc if she was ´´real´´ idk if i could date her or anything but im just glad she exists bc it somehow comforts me a lot yeah anyways ayano essay for another time lol. anyways at this age my favorite characters in kagepro were ayano and konoha ( i still love them a lot) thing is, at this point in my life i didnt know/wasnt aware i was transgender but i already kinda liked he/him pronouns so i roleplayed a lot. online. i roleplayed as konoha obviously lmao and actually one of my irl friends related to shintaro ?? and i think we may have roleplayed lmao and stuff.... she even had a facebook account named shin hikkikomori or smth like that. anyways fast forward bc after being 12 a lot of stuff happened obviously. and none of that relates to kagepro until quite some time. i will mention some items that dont really relate to kagepro but marked moments in my friend group that may be relevant later on. Around 2016)? Some of my closest friends changed schools (but we kept contact) yet i still had a big group at school. But it got fragmented along the way. 2017 i went to Japan and formed a new, different friend group with people that even today, are dear to me. When i came back, my friend group fragmented more. I kept contact with other members of the old group but one on one, not as a group anymore. 2018 we graduated, and i broke up my realtionship with one of my former best friends (2016-2018) 2019 was a year of change, and even though i was afraid and shit got weird, i was not doing too bad. i will skip that. Well. Im sure we all know 2020 was a trainwreck, shit happened. i had a villain arc. I lost my shit,definetely. Ups, downs, whatever. 2021 has not been too different. However, even through everything, in early 2020, i kept close relationships with my friend group. as the year moved forward and the restrictions started lifting ( thank you government very cool <3 //ironically obviously, this is the reason this shit wont go away//) some of my friends saw each other irl and stuff, or talked about stuff i didn´t understand/didn´t want to hear while on discord. I felt alienated. I felt empty. I got mad at a friend for the first time, for something he said. I ended up isolating myself. A friend celebrated her birthday. She invited me and never excluded me, asked me a lot of things and asked to virtually include me. But that would just make me feel more alienated, wouldn´t it? I told her it was ok, i didn´t go. Honestly, I felt like a bother. I didn´t want to bother. I wasn´t okay, but i didn´t want to bother anyone, so i isolated myself. I had a very bad breakdown. lasted weeks. When I recovered, it wasn´t the same. It felt like everyone else was closer, while i drifted away. I kind of recconected with some of my friends from Japan after this. In the vacations, i felt like i reconnected with some friends just to drift away again later. However, i never could reconnect with one of my best friends. She never really got mad at me or anything ( i think) but we don´t really talk much anymore. We used to talk daily, be it actual talking, memes, anything. I don´t think we´ve actually talked in weeks. There´s nothing I can do. This year, another friend had a birthday, but I was so disconnected from everyone I didn´t even care. I mean. It´s all broken now, isn´t it? The other day I just started wondering. When did I start relating to Shintaro so much? I had always been like this, hadn´t I? Who am I, actually? Why do I relate so much now? It´s not just about the soda. I had lost friends before, but I never really felt like that. Sometimes I feel like I´ve lost everyone. In a one year span I became a hikkikomori. About a month ago, when I entered classes, I was recognized as Shintaro pfp and I admitted to kinning him to people i´d never talked to before (on chat) // I decided to go apeshit idc anymore about what anyone thinks of me// I had fun. I think I must´ve posted on my stories, because two different people told me they were the ene to my shintaro. I appreciated it. i mean it´s kinda true bc now that i´m only on the pc they do bother me online and try to get me to open up or get better but sometimes the just annoy me lmao but also not bc they all have their own particular lives and they all seem to be doing better than me. Still, my classmates are very nice and inclusive. But it´s not like im close to any of them I guess. I´m just alone now. I´m fucked up man....I don´t feel real anymore. I don´t really know who I am. I guess that´s why I find comfort in seeing a part of myself in Shintaro? But when did i turn out like this? Why didn´t I relate when I was younger? Well, I hadn´t really lost any friends back then. I now know how painful that is. How lonely it is to be alone even when there is people around. idk. and i´ve always been quiet. introverted. shy. a loser. yet now whenever i meet anyone i try to idk connect? but i cant. i wish i could be more evil. maybe it´d just be easier if everyone really, truly hated me. maybe i´d get the strength to actually kill myself then. it´s weird. i really see myself in route xx shintaro. I know that´s fucked up because I know how it ends. but truly, i was trying. I was healing, i think i was going somewhere. and i was trying to keep my newly formed renovated friend group together. I really was trying to. I didn´t mind if we had sub groups on the big group, but we were all there for each other. I tried my best. I felt like i belonged. but now im alone again. and this time there´s nothing i can do. if something, i´ve made it worse. and i keep making it worse. it´s weird. when i first got into kagepro, both shintaro and ayano felt like adults. i thought they were really, really big. im older than them now. now i know theyre not really adults. i get it. i still feel 18. after all, these last two years have been taken away from me. i didnt waste them myself this time. i feel like a rotten 18 year old...when i listen to lost time memory, i just...get it. i always liked the song. i thought the story was so cool. when it first came out.. i still remember. iwas there. i waited for it. i loved it. i still do, but back then, i just saw it all as some really great and cool song. now i feel like i really, really get it. i love it even more. im hiding away in all my memories. but what is my true heart? what do i really want? i don´t know, i don´t know... If I'm 'wise' then, I can't face forward; I have no reason to so, I'll rot away instead It would be nice if time could be turned back. Years may pass but I'll never die I repeat hopeful words to myself, even though I know I still won't be able to reach you. "It doesn't matter, just die already!" I said as I clutched my wrist, simply cursing it. Unable to do anything, I merely indulged myself in life. "If summer can show me dreams, then let's go to before you were taken away" The days where I hid my embarrassment are illuminating upon the atmosphere and burning my mind. If I'm wishing for a dream that can't come true, then I'll embrace this blurry past and have a dream which I don't wake up from and naturally seclude myself from the outside world. "But that means you can't even see tomorrow?" I don't really care 'bout that, so it's ok I stained my hands in order to kill these boring days I'm choosing "solitude" after all A rotten boy at 18 today too, prayed again while clinging on to your colored smile Underneath the blazing sun Asking "Somehow, please take me away instead of leaving like this!" and my murmuring breath was quietly stopped

I guess i just wish someone could actually help me. take me out of this hole. Maybe some kind of closure would be nice. It´s not the same, though. I don´t have enough bravery in myself to actually kill myself. Mostly because of guilt. I can´t take the guilt of dissapointing everyone. I don´t want my parents to get hurt. I don´t want my bunny to miss me. Yet i wish everyday for it to be over. Lately, half of my dreams have been in Japan, with many friends, some who i met there, some who have never been there. Yet my brain shows me the dreams before it was all taken away. I think one of my favorite parts of the day is dreaming. I like to sleep simply because I dream. And i sleep very few. mayb bc i hate myself? I still barely indulge in life. I do anything to stay distracted. If i think, it all goes to shit. it all does. like now. Heh. it´s funny. I guess no one is truly my ene, because no one actually knows how mentally fucked up i got these past months. No one knows how badly i´ve been treating myself and how badly i´ve been doing. Still, i can´t tell anyone but scream it into the tumblr void. No one has to keep up with my shit. No one has to take care of me. After all, it was I who chose solitude. It was me who kept them away. But I don´t get a second choice. I don´t get a change of routes if things go sour. And i guess I don´t get to get a mentally fucked up friend group where I belong for a second time. Once was good enough, wasn´t it? I.. Even when I wasnt as deep as i am now (again) into kagepro, ive always wanted to die on August 15. It holds meaning to me now as well. Every year I used to ask people to go out with me that day. I know im not brave enough to kill myself. I always hoped for a lil miracle i guess. Last year was the first year...I didn´t do anything. I just... I just hope this year i can make it. I hope the miracle happens this year....I can only hope......its too late for me to be saved, isn´t it? I never thought it´d be like this. I don´t get closure. I don´t get goodbyes. I am left behind on a world that keeps moving. I am nothing.

#long post #hinatalks #we live in a society #fr fr #when i die....if god is real..i´ll end this once and for all. all of it #i am left with nothing but pain and anger.... i cant even feel anymore. i think i forgot how to

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emotionsofthesoul · 5 years

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Chapter 32 _ Los Niños

“Juliana it was magical! You need to go! I’ll even cover for you if you need to take the day off but I need you to see it, you’ll fall in love with Anya all over again, I promise you!” Juliana’s coworker, Andrea, insisted as she told her about the Anastasia play. The closest tour stop was in San Francisco, and they would be there through the 29th of September.

Juliana and Andrea had bonded over the Anastasia movie since they began working together. “Drea, I can’t aford $300 tickets to a play, even if it is THAT play… I have bills to pay dude. I’d love to go but I can’t.”

“Baby doll! They’re only $45 dollars!” Andrea said, “Even if they were $300 I’m sure your sugar mamma would be more than happy to take you.” Andrea finished jokingly.

Juliana let out a loud chuckle and smacked Andrea’s upper arm. “Shut up, don’t call her that!”

“So are you gonna go or what? Make it an early birthday present for yourself, J? I’ll even babysit the kids if you need me to.” Andrea said in a very serious tone.

“What kids?” Juliana asked confused causing Andrea to break into a fit of laughter.

Grabbing ahold of Juliana’s shoulders, Andrea shook her dramatically, “exactly! You don’t have any! No one is stopping you, J! Grab your girl and go, have fun. Do something for you, dude.”

Juliana laughed, she truly enjoyed Andrea’s company. She was one of the most optimistic people she had ever met. That girl had a solution to everything and she always found a positive to every negative situation.

“Okay, you’re right I’ve been dying to see it and was completely devastated when it was no longer on Broadway. It’s not that far, I’ll talk with Valentina and see if we can go this weekend. Thank you, Drea, I’ll tell her you’ll watch the kids she’ll be so happy to get away from them for a few hours.” Juliana said still playing along as she packed up her stuff.

As the girls closed up the shop Andrea nodded to herself satisfied that her work had been done. “We can fangirl about it when you get back. Because believe me when I say Tommy isn’t the type of twin to fangirl with me, he only took me because it was our birthday and he knew I wouldn’t shut up about it otherwise.”

Juliana looked up as she found her car keys to see Valentina leaning against her Mustang.

“Im gonna get going, I’ll see you tomorrow, boo.” Andrea said giving Juliana a hug as she turned to Valentina and greeted her with a happy smile and a peace sign, “Hi Valentina, bye Valentina.”

Juliana smiled as Andrea walked away. She turned to look at Valentina throwing daggers at Andrea with her eyes. “Hi Val, what are you doing here?” When she didn’t get a response she got on her tippy toes and gave Valentina a subtle peck on the cheek.

With that, Valentina looked down and smiled at Juliana. “Hi.”

“Why don’t you like her?” Juliana asked letting out a small giggle.

“I never said I didn’t like her.” Valentina said avoiding Juliana’s eye contact.

Juliana threw her head back laughing, “yeah, tell that to your face, babe.”

Valentina crossed her arms and pouted not wanting to admit she was jealous of Juliana’s coworker. “She’s just too friendly, it seems fake.”

“Drea is one of the more genuine people I know, baby. She really likes you, and she’s a really good friend.” Juliana said unlocking the passenger door.

“Are you sure it’s not you she likes?” Valentina said observing Juliana as she unlocked the car.

As the words left Valentina’s mouth, Juliana tensed a bit and she raised her eyebrow. “Valentina, we’re not doing this out here, get in the car.”

Knowing Juliana was not playing Valentina did as she was told while Juliana went around and got in the car, herself.

“I don’t know why you don’t like her Valentina but you don’t know her. For starters she’s engaged to a guy and she’s straighter than Eva. Second you might not know her but you know me. Or at least you should. I’ve never once given you a reason to doubt me. This jealousy thing is a joke and I’m not laughing. It was cute at first but if you’re seriously jealous of Andrea, what the hell Valentina?”

Valentina didn’t know how to respond to that. It was the first time Juliana got upset with her over something like this and she didn’t know what to do. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I just don’t like the idea of someone else having you. She get’s under my skin with how annoyingly attached she thinks she can be with you.”

“Valentina, what are you talking about? We’re friends, Andrea is only my friend. I’m allowed to have friends, as are you. I’m yours and I’ve never given you a reason to think I’d run off with someone else. I’m not liking jealous you. You need to chill.” Juliana said running a hand threw her hair, irritated with Valentina’s jealousy. “Why are you here anyway? If you just came para hacerme una escena de celos, you should go because I don’t wanna argue with you but I’m not gonna feed your little celos either.”

“Juls, you’re right, I messed up, I’m sorry. That’s not what I came for.” Valentina said looking up from her lap. She turned her body towards Juliana. “Juliana, I’m sorry. I was actually here to invite you to the loft, Guille is having a little dinner to celebrate the baby news and I came to see if you were in the mood to go but now…”

Juliana observed Valentina’s face. It was full of regret and those big blue orbs were looking straight into her eyes.

Drawing in a sign, Juliana brought her hand up towards Valentina’s cheek, “Val, I’m sorry if I overreacted but I’m just not okay with this attitude. You have no reason to be jealous, especially of Andrea of all people. You don’t have to like it her but don’t villainize her either, please. She’s not after your girl. She’s not even gay for crying out loud.” Juliana caressed Valentina’s cheek as she spoke. “Imagine if I went off and was crazy jealous over Hope when she first got back from Europe. She’s super touchy with you but I know what we have and I know that the end of the day, she’s your best friend but I’m your girlfriend. And I know you wouldn’t be dumb enough to mess up what we’ve fought so hard for. So I need you to do the same. I need you to trust me.”

Valentina nodded closing her eyes for a few seconds before opening them again. “Okay. I trust you, I might not trust the world but I trust you.”

“That’s all I ask.” Juliana said as she brought Valentina in for a kiss.

After their conversation they headed over to loft with the rest of the Carvajal family. Eva, who Valentina truly thought wouldn’t show, was there happy to celebrate with her brother. She was really making the effort of trying to get closer to Renata and Lusia. The two were more than welcoming but still kept their distance before fully trusting the eldest Carvajal sibling.

On their way to Juliana’s apartment from the dinner Juliana told Valentina all about the Anastasia play. She told her they could leave Sunday morning to make it in time for the 2pm show. It was 2 and a half hours and Valentina was on board. She knew how much that story meant to Juliana and if she wanted to attend she wouldn’t stop her or turn her invitation down.

When Sunday came around the two made the drive. She knew Juliana had never been to San Francisco so Valentina offered to drive. The whole ride there they talked animatedly and listened to music from their favorite artists.

Upon arrival the girls went straight to their seats. They were in the second row and thankfully there were two empty seats in front of them, giving them a clear view of the stage.

Once the play was over, Juliana had shed many tears and was grateful that Valentina would agree to see the play with her. On the ride back they talked about the different scenes they loved and Juliana emphasized her love for the costumes and backdrops. She had never been to the theatre or seen a play and she was glad Anastasia was her first.

Juliana spoke about how Demitri’s character grew on her. The entire drive home they listened the play's soundtrack. They sang along to most of them but especial Once Upon A December. That was one of the only songs Valentina knew by heart and she loved to see Juliana’s face light up when she sang along to it so she made sure to sing it every single time it came on.

“Thank you for coming with me, Val. This was the only play I would’ve paid to watch in New York but I’m so glad it was here and not as expensive as it would’ve been in NYC.” Juliana said as she scrolled through her music.

“Anytime, baby. This is what you love so why wouldn’t I come. Plus since I finished the images from the trip on Friday, I had the weekend free to do anything. It was a good show and I’m happy you asked me to come with you. Remind me to thank Andrea for watching the kids.” Valentina said playfully at the end. She had spent Friday and Saturday’s lunch break with the girls at the boutique trying to get to know Andrea a little better, for Juliana’s sake.

#juliantina #juliana valdes #valentina carvajal #forever #Forever update #forever ch32 #chapter 32

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watchmegetobsessed · 5 years

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Crush // Shawn Mendes mini-series part 2

part 2 wohoooo!! this is honestly such a cute story i love writing it, im currently finishing the last part so i’ll probably update very soon!

part 1

masterlist

The awkwardness soon vanishes. This clear new chapter we just opened with Shawn allows me to loosen up and just enjoy a nice evening. Aaliyah and Eric seems satisfied with the outcome, the parents seem to hit it off quite easily and when we leave they already start making plans for another meetup.

“It was so nice meeting you!” Karen sighs happily as she hugs goodbye to all of us.

“You too, email me that recipe you told me about!” Mom points at her and she nods her head laughing.

I’m just about to step out of the house when Aaliyah grabs my wrist and pulls me back. I look at her with furrowed eyebrows.

“I need your help with a little something. Can you come over sometime tomorrow?” she whispers confidentially.

“Um, yeah. Around what time?” I ask.

“Three pm?”

“Sure,” I smile at her and she lets go of me.

On the way back home I’m thinking about what Aaliyah could need help with and the only thing I have in mind is Eric’s birthday that is on the 29th. She must be planning something special for him.

I call Maddi around midnight when I’m already in my pj’s, but I know she must be still up, maybe even drunk. For my surprise, she answers the phone quite modestly.

“How was the family union?” she asks chewing on something. I throw the cushions off of my bed and crawl under the blanket.

“Um, very interesting,” I chuckle closing my eyes and just shaking my head at the thought of the evening.

“Uh, spill the tea!” She cheers clearly very thirsty for some drama, though this story is not as juicy as she would want it.

“Guess who Aaliyah’s brother is!” I say, but I don’t expect an answer so I just continue. “Shawn Effing Mendes.”

“What?! Are you kidding me?” She gasps. “How did Eric forget to tell you this small detail?”

“Apparently, he thought it doesn’t matter to me, which is kind of true, but there is more.”

“What more? Did he hit on you? Because I’m not talking to you again if he did. He is hot!”

“No, he didn’t, but what you don’t know is that we have history.”

“Okay, now I’m confused!? How do I not know about this?”

“Well, remember my ex, Dylan? I told you about him.”

“Yeah, the asshole who cheated on you,” she hums.

“Well, Dylan and Shawn used to be best buds when we started dating, but the guy hated my guts, or so I thought. He was always mean to me, talking against me and just… avoiding me like the plague.”

“I thought he is the nicest person on earth.”

“He might be now, but when I knew him, he treated me like shit. So it was pretty awkward to see him again after all these years.”

“And how did it go? Was he an ass again?”

“No. He was… nice. Well, we both acted awkward in the beginning, I didn’t know if he would continue his act with me, but he turned out to be nice. And then at one point he told me he is sorry for everything in the past and he was just acting like that because he wanted to amuse Dylan.”

I turn to my side and stare out the window.

“That’s good, right? I mean, he grew out that mean phase and he is all good now.”

“Yeah, it’s just still weird to be around someone I knew from my Dylan phase.”

“But it’s Eric who is dating Aaliyah, why would you be constantly around him?”

“Aaliyah asked me to go over tomorrow, I think she is trying to put a surprise together for Eric’s birthday, so I’m spending the afternoon at the Mendes house.”

“Oh, then keep me updated about the details and sneak me a shirtless photo of Shawn please.”

“Maddi!” I scoff laughing. “Why would I even see him shirtless?”

“Maybe he likes wandering around in his home without clothes on, how would I know?!”

“Unbelievable. I’m going to sleep.”

“Bye bitch,” she sighs making me roll my eyes at her smiling.

“Bye.”

I sleep late the next day, it’s past noon when I actually make it downstairs looking like a real human being. Eric and Dad are watching a documentary on WW II. while Mom is reading the newspaper at the dining table. I join her with a bowl of cereal.

“Do you have any plans for today?” She smiles at me over her narrow glasses as she turns a page. I lean closer hitting a confidential tone.

“I’m helping Aaliyah today, she asked me to go over around three.”

“Oh, birthday surprise for Eric?” she asks clearly excited.

“I think yeah.”

“Great. And you will probably see Shawn again.” Winking at me she puts the papers down.

“Why does that matter?” I ask with my mouth full. She caresses my cheek before standing up and walking over to the sink for some water.

“Isn’t he a nice young man? I think the two of you would look cute together.”

“Mom, you are literally talking about the biggest pop sensation, he is not really the kind of guy who just casually dates,” I say.

In my mind all these celebrities are living their wildest life. Even if I were interested in Shawn in any way, I’m pretty sure I couldn’t even get in the game, he must have thousands of girls waiting for him in line. We are not really on the same page.

“Oh, come on. You guys knew each other in high school, you have a past, that connection must mean something!”

“He was an ass to me!” I blurt it out making her eyebrows raise.

“He was? What did he do?”

“It’s nothing,” I roll my eyes, but Mom gives me a demanding look. “He just didn’t seem to like me no matter what I did, he was avoiding me most of the time when I was with Dylan and also made some pretty rude comments sometimes.”

“Maybe he was into you,” Mom shrugs and I almost choke on the milk.

I start coughing like I’m about to die and my eyes start watering when I’m finally able to breathe evenly again.

“No fucking way!”

“Charlie! Language!” She hisses at me, but there is a smile hiding in her eyes. “You know, young boys tend to do it. They are mean to the girls they like.”

“Mom, it wasn’t in kindergarten, it was ninth grade or something. I think he just really didn’t like me back then and I don’t blame him.” I was annoying, thinking back at it. But hey, all teens are annoying!

“You can never know,” she sighs.

I totally ignore the theory Mom tried to make me believe, there is absolutely no chance of the nonsense she told me, and this is what I keep telling myself as I’m on my way to the Mendes house.

“Hey!” Aaliyah greets me with a wide smile. She is now wearing some more comfortable clothes than the last two times I saw her, the grey sweats and lose white shirt must be her home wear. “Come in! My parents are out at a friend’s place, and Shawn…” she starts, but just when she is about to finish he appears on the top of the stairs.

“Is here,” he chimes in. I look up and there he is, in a pair of checked pj pants and a black shirt. Looking at it, I think Aaliyah has his shirt on, it seems like the same size.

“Hi,” I smile at him.

“Come, let’s sit.” I follow Aaliyah into the living room and we sit down to the couch next to their Christmas tree. From the corner of my eyes I see Shawn going into the kitchen and for a moment I’m actually disappointed he is not coming with us.

“So. I want to surprise Eric with cooking for him, but I have no idea what. I tried to find out what’s his favorite, but he says it’s his favorite to everything!” she growls frustrated. I shake my head laughing.

“That’s typical.”

“Yeah. So do you have anything in mind?”

“Well, he really like tiramisu. He can eat tons of it, all the time. That’s good for dessert,” I offer. Aaliyah has her phone in her hands and she is typing everything I say down.

“Okay, got it.”

“Um, he likes gazpacho. He thinks it sounds fancy and you know, he likes everything with ketchup, so a soup that tastes like tomato was made for him.”

“Oh yeah, he pours so much ketchup into his sandwiches, it’s crazy,” she rolls her eyes jokingly. “Okay, so gazpacho. Anything else?”

“Um…” I try to think about the times we went to restaurants and Eric got really excited over the food. “Oh, we were once at a place and he ordered grilled mushrooms and he couldn’t stop moaning, it was very embarrassing, but I guess this meant he really liked it.”

“Grilled mushrooms, perfect,” she nods to herself noting everything down. “Do you mind helping me pick out his gift too? I have a few ideas, I want to go into the city and buy it tomorrow, I already looked up some jumpers online, but I can’t really decide.”

“Sure, show me!”

We spend the next thirty minutes scrolling through everything she had saved as a possible gift. She found some really nice ones, her taste is fantastic. As the time is passing I’m starting to feel like I’m with a friend and not with my brother’s girlfriend and I’m just hoping Eric will keep her around for a long time.

She asks me to stay a little bit longer so she can show me the awkward photos she has taken of Erik since they’ve been dating, but she gets a call and excuses herself quickly. I stay there in the living room, looking around a bit, I haven’t really had the chance yesterday, I was too occupied with the situation.

Shawn walks in, this time he has a headband on, keeping his locks back from his face.

Damn, Maddi is right. He is hot.

I shake my head at the thoughts and try to look as casual as possible.

“How is the birthday planning going?” he asks plopping down on the couch next to me.

“Good, Aaliyah basically had everything right, I just had to choose the best options.”

“How crazy is that our younger siblings are dating? I mean, I was thinking about it yesterday, the last time I saw Eric, he was about twelve or something. No wonder why I didn’t recognize him when I met him,” he chuckles and I nod agreeing. Aaliyah changed a lot in the past years too.

“Yeah. Strange that they are not babies anymore. I mean, I’m still mad that Eric is taller than me.”

“Oh I remember how you always wanted to get taller!”

“You remember?” I ask surprised. I used to never stop talking about my height, later I accepted my fate.

“Yeah, I remember once you told Dylan how you want to wear the highest heels to the dance so you two can be the same height.”

I laugh at the memory. I remember it too, it was quite early in our relationship and Dylan asked me out for the Halloween dance. I wanted to look taller and told Dylan I would wear heels. Of course, I ditched the plan as I found out how uncomfortable they are and ended up wearing my Converse.

“And at the end I looked like a punk princess with my Converse and mini skirt,” I scoff at the thought of my outfit for that night.

“I think you looked pretty,” Shawn says and I look at him. I catch his small smile before he shakes his head clearing his throat. What the Hell? “High school feels so far away, right?” he quickly says.

“Um, well for you I guess, for me… not really,” I chuckle shaking my head. “Your life got turned upside down, but not much has happened to me since then.”

“What? I don’t believe you. I’m sure you’ve been having plenty of fun. Parties, dates and everything.”

I can’t help, a sad smile plasters across my face. He can’t be more wrong.

“Not really… I had some rough years after Dylan and I split.”

“Can I ask what happened? I mean, after the split,” he shyly asks.

“Well, since I was a dumb naïve little girl, I needed an entire year before I could even think about getting to know other guys. Now it all just seems like the biggest bullshit. I shouldn’t have cared that much. And I’m not a fan of partying, I only go out on birthdays and maybe New Year’s Eve,” I shrug. Maddi has been trying to boost me up a bit, she attempts to drag me out every month or so, but I’m really not that kind of type. I thought I was, when I was with Dylan, he was a popular guy, I kept going to these lame parties with him in the last year of our relationship, but I never really enjoyed them. Shawn was long gone by then.

“I’m sorry Dylan played you so bad.”

“It’s fine, I mean, not your fault,” I chuckle. “But what happened to you and him?”

He sighs scratching the back of his neck.

“Not sure, I guess we grew apart and I realized that he is an ass. When I became a private student we kept in touch, but I met new people and I saw how different a friendship can be, so… I cut him off, I guess.”

“Did you guys fight?”

“Not really,” he shakes his head. “Well, we had one last very awkward phone call when I was in Atlanta, if I remember right. It was forced and… just awkward, really,” he chuckles shaking his head.

“And your life has been better since Dylan is out of it, right?” I grin at him.

“Yeah, you must know about it.”

I laugh nodding. I know everything about it!

Before I could even think about what I’m saying, my mouth just opens and the words roll down.

“The only good thing I got from my relationship with Dylan is that I know you now.”

My eyes widen and I wish I could take it back.

“I- uh I mean…”

I don’t even know why I’m so nervous suddenly, I didn’t even tell much. But for some reason, I can feel myself blushing.

“I meant that he basically ruined my senior year and I needed so much time to get myself over him, but at least now we can talk like, normal people,” I quickly add somehow saving the situation.

“What do you mean he ruined your senior year?” he asks with furrowed eyebrows and I’m happy he didn’t get caught up on what I said before that.

“Well, he successfully made me push all my friends away, leaving me totally alone when we broke up.”

“Wait, what? How about that friend of yours, um… I don’t remember her name, you always sat together at lunch.”

“Rochelle. Oh Dylan played us dirty. He told me Rochelle keeps hitting on him and being my dumb naïve self I believed him and not her. We had this huge fight and I called her a bitch. No wonder why she didn’t care about me when I was alone in the last couple of months of senior year.”

“Ouch, that sounds horrible. I’m sorry he did that.”

“Why did we even like Dylan in the first place?” I ask laughing to myself. It still bothers me how blind I was, I wish I could just shake myself.

“I have no idea!” He sighs rolling his eyes. “I’m sorry your senior year got fucked up, I wish I could be there to have lunch with you.”

I turn to him and swear to God he is blushing! And it is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. I feel the urge to touch him, anywhere, to take his hand in mine, but I stop myself.

“That’s… nice. Thank you,” I whisper touched.

As I’m staring at him I realize this is probably the closest I’ve ever been to him. I wonder how many girls want to be in my position, they see the popstar, the heartthrob from the stage, while all I see is the guy who used to be mean to me in high school but now we are friendlier than ever. I could never see him as a celebrity.

“Okay, so I found some- Oh am I bothering?” Aaliyah walks into the room with her phone in her hands and she is giving me a knowing look. I quickly clear my throat turning away from Shawn.

“No, you girls just… do your thing. I have to make a few calls.”

Shawn jumps up from the couch patting his sister’s shoulder before walking out of the room. Aaliyah takes his place, still grinning.

“What?” I ask her playing dumb.

“You guys… I felt the sparkle,” she says wiggling her eyebrows.

“What sparkle? Aaliyah, you see everything in pink because of my brother.”

“Oh stop, don’t tell me you don’t like him.”

“I don’t know him,” I say truthfully. “The last time I saw him I was dating a douche and he was also being a douche to me. I can’t tell if I like him, because I don’t know his new self.”

“But you seem to get along with him pretty well and I’m sure you are attracted to him.”

“I’m not talking about this with you, you are his sister!” I gasp feeling myself blushing again.

“Whatever. But I think you two would look cute together.”

I refuse to carry on with the conversation about me and Shawn and Aaliyah fortunately doesn’t force it on me. I leave the Mendes house around five, Aaliyah thanks me the help and I can’t help but feel disappointed I don’t see Shawn anywhere when I’m leaving. Aaliyah’s speech about me and Shawn is slowly getting to me.

By dinner, all my thoughts are racing around him and soon I find myself stalking his social media profiles. I knew he is very famous, but seeing the numbers on his pages makes me gasp. Millions of people are following him, waiting for him to post anything. The last photo he uploaded to his Instagram is with his family, Karen and Manny are smiling proudly into the camera while Shawn and Aaliyah are messing around next to them. Before I could realize what I’m doing I double tap the picture liking it.

“Oh shit,” I suck my breath in. I hesitate, but then I realize how dumb this is. He must be getting millions of notes every minute, he won’t see this.

Gaining some confidence from this, I decide to follow him and continue my stalking session. I’m a few months deep into his profile when I get a notification. Opening the tab my eyes widen.

shawnmendes followed charlieprkr

I guess I was wrong about the notification getting lost. A moment later I see that he has liked two of my photos.

One was taken on a family vacation. Eric and I are posing at the beach, I have a red swimsuit on and the wind is blowing my wavy blonde hair that was so much lighter back than from all the sunshine. The other one is a picture Maddie took of me last month. I’m sitting in our armchair with a mug of tea in my hands, smiling shyly at the camera. We had Christmas lights in the window and the lights made me look colorful in the photo.

I’m just about to put the phone down and go to bed when I get a dm. I’m not surprised to see Shawn’s username, but I definitely get excited.

shawnmendes I’m happy I’m not the first one to accidentally like your photo, though I was minutes away from that haha

I smile at the message rolling my eyes.

charlieprkr Ha. Ha. I was hoping I can easily hide in the millions of your followers.

shawnmendes You could have, if only I weren’t stalking your profile as well. Fate?

charlieprkr I guess.

My fingers linger across the keyboard, trying to think of something else to write and keep the conversation up, but nothing comes to my mind. I almost give up when I get another message from him.

shawnmendes I’m in a nostalgic mood, I want to have a walk in the neighborhood, around our school tomorrow. Would you like to join me?

My smile grows wider than ever reading his lines.

charlieprkr Totally.

shawnmendes Great! Sometime around 4 pm?

charlieprkr Perfect. Where?

shawnmendes I’ll meet you at your house and we’ll go from there.

charlieprkr Then see you tomorrow!

shawnmendes Yeah, good night Charlie.

#shawn #mendes #shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes fanfics #shawn mendes fanfictions #shawn mendes imagine #mendes army #crush #crush mini series

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chubsjiminiie · 6 years

Text

Bʀᴇᴀᴋ Mʏ Hᴇᴀʀᴛ 🌙 preview pt 25

a/n: THERES A SECOND PART COMING TM AND THEN IMMA MERGE THEM AS ONE BUT I PROMISED TO POST TODAY AND I DIDNT GET TO FINISH BC I HAVE HW AND IVE BEEN BUSY W WORK BUT IM GOING TO FINISH TONIGHT ILLYYY

~тaeнyυng х reader

~ pt 25/??

~ birthday preview

~ prev || next

posts everyday at 9pm est

requests are open!

You giggle looking down at your phone seeing all your friends being a little dumb. Your birthday had finally arrived, usually you weren’t one for birthdays because they were just another regular day. At least that’s what they ended up feeling like since you had either school or work that took up most of your time.

Tae really put his all in celebrating your birthday this year. Buying gifts left and right; anything he thought that you’d enjoy he got. So far thing between the two of you really had gone well; it seemed things were getting somewhat serious. You spent almost every single day together, finding any free time to see each other and have little dates. Every time he was near your heart overflowed with love, you were falling in deep. It seemed, at least to you, his eyes were brighter, his smile sweeter, his touch a little warmer, and his heart a little softer.

With everyday that passed your feelings got stronger, and you were almost 100% sure you had fallen deeply, madly in love with Kim Taehyung, your best friend. It was different now though; before you tried your best to ignore what you felt because he’d never feel the same but that has changed. Now you knew his flirting and clinginess wasn’t all in your head, it was real. Jungkook, being his roommate, was constantly teasing you about stealing his boyfriend and hogging him night and day. There were times when he’d complain even when he wasn’t with you but you assumed it was him just messing with you. The others were very supportive about everything and very invested in the relationship.

For tonight though, you guys weren’t really bothering with thinking about the budding relationship. It was time to enjoy the party and get drunk out of your minds. All the boys had agreed on things to help you get prepare and were going to be at your place an hour early. They said you were going to need some help protecting your place for the destruction that was to come. Already you could see the mess that would be waiting for you tomorrow morning. Beer cans and bottles scattered everywhere. red solo cups covering every single flat surface, strange puddles of liquids on your wooden floor. Maybe you shouldn’t be celebrating your birthday with a hundred drunk college students… oh well.

The night before Taehyung had come over to give you his final present and stay the night with you. It was huge teddy bear and a bunch of balloons with a bouquet of roses. In that moment you had no idea how to react so you jumped on his and wrapped your legs around his waist. He got caught off guard so you both fell to the couch behind him and you both laugh. You felt your smile grow just thinking back on that memory and you looked up to your ceiling. After doing what you need you had come to lay down on your bed but you couldn’t calm your mind from constantly thinking of Tae. He was in your guest room changing into his outfit, he had brought two full bags of clothes to make sure he was prepared for any outfit color you chose. It was these small things he did that always made your heart swoon and jump out of your chest. They gave you hope, hope that everything would be alright if the two of you made the decision to stay together.

Some could call you ignorant for trusting a fuckboy, even if he’s your best friend. That made it worst thought because you had seen all the moves he makes to get girls or to break hearts, you knew his little games. There were girls in your classes that “warned” you about him, they said when they hooked up he was quick to leave and ignore their entire existence. They said he may be a little nicer because you were friends but at the end of the day he was Taehyung. Not going to lie this ran through your head a lot, you always wondered if he was playing games but you gave him the benefit of the doubt. He would never you thought, he cares way too much about you not just romantically but as a friend. Was he really the type to not give a fuck and hurt his own best friend knowing she’s head over heels for him?

You don’t know though, and that in itself drove you crazy. He had so much power in his hands, it was all in his next move to see what came out of everything.

You eyelids slowly began to close trying to keep away the negative thoughts that had already starting coming through. Tonight is for having fun, enjoying your birthday, celebrating you. Suddenly the empty side of you bed sunk down and a body laid next to yours. He slowly turned and wrapped his arm around your waist resting his on your chest.

“Princess, are you taking a nap before your ruin your liver tonight?” he whispered not wanting to wake you up in case you were really asleep.

“Mhm. Oppa really has good ideas about charging up before a party,” you giggle.

He chuckles at your comment and somehow cuddles closer onto you; you bring your free arms and wrap them around him pulling him even closer. You both had always had cuddling sessions and slept in the same bed together but it’s been completely different nowadays. They felt, weird, a good weird. The type of cuddles that made you want to giggle and blush and just be there forever if it was possible. As soon as you both started to get into your nap a loud bang can from the front door being swung open. Six voices filled the empty rooms at your place, their feet shuffling around trying to find where the star of the night was. Once they reached your room they saw the two of you laying holding each other and began their teasing. Jimin and Jungkook hyped it up the most jumping on the bed and falling on top of the both of you claiming they wanted cuddles too. Jin and Namjoon were hand in hand laughing from the door. Surprisingly Hobi and Yoongi were also hand in hand but their expressions were unreadable. Almost as if something was bothering them but as their eyes met yours their smiles appeared.

“ALRIGHT MY CHILDREN LETS HEAD DOWN AND GET OUR DRINK ON!” Namjoon yelled overly excited.

“Hell yeah!” Jungkook jumped off the bed and made his way down with the rest of the guys.

Taehyung and you took a bit longer trying to unwrap yourselves and fix up the messiness that was created by the cuddles. As you made your way down, his hand found yours and intertwined your fingers. He loved being touchy, he lived for holding hands, hugging, and any type of affection. Time passed as you guys pregamed in the middle of kitchen. Each one of you complained about all the assignments that were being given in almost every major. Most of you being art majors, you enjoyed and hated big projects because you had creative control but the deadlines really killed.

Slowly more college students began arriving and started drinking. In the beginning most of them tried their best to greet you but as the night went on they completely forgot why they came in the first place. The music was blasting and shaking all the beautiful paintings and pictures on your wall but you didn’t mind. it felt good to let loose and celebrate you. The guys had stuck by your side most of the night wanting to drink as much as possible with you.

“No Jungkook stop you can’t say those things to a girl!!!” Jin scolded the youngest.

“Jin hyung. I only wanted to know if she keeps money in her bra like y/n!”

“You can’t ask so freely unless you know her!” he shook his head, “She’s going to think your a creep.”

“That’s okay,” Jungkook shrugged and his bunny teeth came out as his lips spread into a big smile.

You didn’t know how many shots you had taken but it was… a lot. Plus the guys were refilling your red solo cup right after you finished, it felt like you were floating at this point. Taehyung had drank just as much as you taking every shot you took filling his cup just as much as yours got filled. He was gone. You were a bit surprise to find out he was even more touchy as a drunk. He turned to face you and brought you into a hug, his arms wrapped around your waist and his head rested on your shoulder. You were leaning against a wall in your house as the rest of the group circled around you. His soft lips began to peck your shoulder sweetly, he moved up a bit and started kissing your jaw. Your knees felt weak as he got closer to your ear.

His raspy voice whispered, “You’re so beautiful y/n.”

“Thank you,” you spoke back softly not really knowing what to do.

His lips continued to leave trails of kisses along your neck and shoulders until he finally reached your lips. He only gave you a small peck and let go of you.

“I’ve been wanting to kiss you all day long but I haven’t had the balls to,” he chuckles as he bends down speaking into your ear, “I almost forgot to tell you. I have one last present to give you. But it’s for when were both alone.”

You’re eyebrows knitted together and your head tilted to the side, “Birthday sex?” you asked teasing him jokingly.

“I mean if you’re down…” you playfully smack his arm, “No baby, its something more special. I can give you birthday sex after that if were sober enough,” he winked.

You both laughed at each other and he pulled you into his arms. This time he was leaning against the wall and your back was pressed to his chest. His head rested on the top of your head and his arms were on your shoulders. You held his hand, and watched your friends get wasted and start talking complete nonsense. Feeling in the mood to move around and take out all the energy the alcohol had given you, you drag Tae out to dance with you. Your dancing wasn’t much of anything, a couple of the guys gave you thumbs up or would make kissing faces at you. You were too out of it to feel Tae’s phone vibrate in his pocket but he noticed.

He pulled his phone out and looked down at who had texted him. He felt his body cringe just looking at the name written on the screen while he was having a moment with you. The text read, “Where are you?”, there were 3 dots indicating she was typing. He didn’t want to but he couldn’t help it. He excused himself and went into the bathroom to text back the girl who had just texted him.

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bananadineapple · 6 years

Text

Distraction >> phase 2

PROMPT: It's Y/N's birthday. In the Avengers tower where Bucky was set to distract Y/N from a party, she was already distracted herself while walking back. It didn't help as well when she sees Bucky with his bare arms and toned body sitting in the middle of the couch.

PAIRING: Bucky x slightlyOCD!Reader

WORD COUNT: 5,564

WARNINGS: Language, a bit of NSFW (just a teensy bit)

A/N: IM BACK GUYS and Im so sorry this took reaaal long, I had to make sure every detail was perfect. And it actually too reeeeal long to write, surprisingly. But at last, I have delivered! And so will Bucky soon if you continue to read on nyeheheheh ;))

I hope you guys like it!

MASTERLIST

Phase one >> Phase two

Y/N has just come home from a long and exhausting briefing, one that to her distaste fell on her birthday. After that alarming surprise mission that knocked all the energy out of the Avengers, Y/N was more than worried for her own state of wellbeing. So all the while she stood their explaining every detail of the mission to Fury, she was absent-mindedly thinking if the rest of the team was still up for a night out in a resto bar, laughing and celebrating the night away while trying to endure everyone else's corny half-drunk birthday messages.

It was a huge breath of air when Fury does the weirdest thing he’s ever done; hug her and wish her a happy birthday along with a short but well-meant ‘thank-you’ for her undying loyalty and service to SHIELD and the Avengers. With a short nod from his head he dismisses her, and she went bolting right out of the building, a bit ignorant of the passing greetings coming from her co-workers and friends, and hopped right in her car while mentally laying out the plan for tonight such as which resto bar would be nice enough, the budget Tony would be willing to allot, how much alcohol would Steve be willing to allow, and what to wear and all the basic fiddle-faddles of a night out.

Oddly, she found her train of thoughts faltering when she had imagined a certain someone's smile she'd want to see all night long. Maybe his piercing blue eyes crinkling with his heartfelt laughter and his warm aura that made her feel safe was on the list of things Y/N so desperately wanted to see to complete her birthday night out. Even if he just sat there quietly, not bothering to talk more than a few words with her other than ‘Happy Birthday’ or ‘You look nice tonight’, it’d be enough.

----

“Does he hate me or something?”

Clint makes one of the most shocked faces Y/N has ever seen her best friend make.

“Y/N” He quickly makes his way beside her, “You and I both know you’re way to kindhearted for anyone in the Avengers team to hate.”

“But…I have no idea why he won’t talk to me.” Clint noticed the way Y/N’s voice trails off into a whisper, as if he didn’t notice the fact that Y/N was completely interested in Bucky.

“And I have no idea why you won’t talk to him.”

Her eyes widened with realization when she looked at Clint’s knowing face. And she feared that beneath that look was a reason why the silent air between her and Bucky remained untouched throughout the months.

“It’s 2018, for God’s sake Y/N.” Despite the annoying chuckle from her close friend, she nods slowly, “It doesn’t matter who goes first. What matters is how long will you let the silence last. Don't complain about something you can fix yourself."

Y/N remained silent. And that’s when Clint knew she knew he was right.

“You think he’ll like me back?”

“Everyone does, and so does he. Just give it a go, maybe tomorrow’s you’re lucky day.”

----

Despite the image from the surface of Bucky Barnes as the soldier he is with his undeniably attractive frame, she wanted to see that man she fell in love with over the few words and interactions they’ve had for months.

She was clueless to whatever was the reason behind Bucky's shy nature. From all that action she sees of him on the field; strapping, ruthless and fierce with every move he makes, he just suddenly turns into a big ball of awkwardness around her. Y/N tried many times to figure out if it was her morning breath or something on her face that was bothering Bucky to not even have a normal conversation with her. To this, she just painful got accustomed to, thinking that in no ways would it ever change. Even during the past couple birthdays all he would do is mutter a greeting with a compressed smile she awkwardly reciprocates.

And it became a silent agreement all of a sudden. Nods, silent glances, very small talks that would last for only seconds even if she wanted it to last for hours. A 'safe' distance, as she put it, Y/N thought it was best that they kept it that way, because she was slowly giving into the thought that he just doesn't feel the same way and that's really just how the real world works.

So yes, it was pretty surprising that he was suddenly right there in the middle of the living room, just suddenly taking interest in actually looking back at her eyes.

"Hey Y/N." He spoke in a tone softer than from the raspier one she often hears.

"Uh...” She had no idea what to say so Y/N gives off an awkward wave of her hand, “…h-hey Bucky.”

“You’re here early?”

The words and the way he said it was different.

Too different that she tried gathering her thoughts to figure out if this was real, of just another one of her birthday fantasies. But when Bucky puts on that signature, million-dollar smile on his face, just once, and the entire view of his gorgeous, sculpted body pressing against the tight fabrics of his clothes began to seethe through Y/N sense of focus. The moment she felt the rising heat in her cheeks threatening to ruin her composure she clears her throat and tore her gaze from Bucky before her eyes began to travel down further.

“Uh yeah yeah I-uh…” The habit of denying the words Y/N was dying to say to him stuck to her like a leech, and she didn’t bother to take it off especially with him around looking like such a fucking god, “Fury gave me an ‘early dismissal’ as his birthday present to me.”

When Y/N’s eyes weren’t looking where he wanted them to be, Bucky was knocked ever so slightly out of focus out of a distant feeling of uncertainty of the plan working.

“You okay Y/N? Did whatever that incident I heard a while ago still bother you?”

At Bucky’s decision to stand up from where he was seated, Y/N found herself awkwardly shifting her stance while rubbing the back of her neck nervously. Because she still couldn’t imagine managing to stay alive under his towering stature dangerously close to her.

Shit Y/N stop it.

“No no it’s just that…” You’re too hot to look at damn it. “…FRIDAY was acting real weird with the keypad and everything and Tony-“

When Y/N too suddenly pauses, so did Bucky. Because it looked like she had realized something real big, and Bucky was mentally hoping that she had it all figured out. But it wasn’t the surprise she figured out, but a ticket out of this thickly awkward air between them, that could still eventually lead to the sabotage of the Avengers’ plan.

“TONY!” Bucky was startled at the way her body jolted and her finger pointed at him. “Yes, uh Tony! I-I need to look for Tony.”

“W-what?”

Safe distance. Safe distance, Y/N, she tells to herself like a mantra.

Y/N’s feet began to shift as she tried to figure out where to walk around and way way far from Bucky. But at every shift to her left or to her right Bucky quickly blocks her to it. She stops for a moment to make sure she wasn’t being fooled by her playful imagination. And she was certain with the way he had oddly locked his gaze into hers as if he was observing every movement she made. Again, odd. And extremely hot enough to form a lump in her throat she could not manage to swallow.

“Why?”

Bucky had stepped closer to his right to block Y/N off just a subtle bit so as not to give it all away.

“I-It’s my birthday and-“

Another step to her left, was mirrored suit by Bucky.

“H-Happy Birthday by the way.”

By then he was already a few inches away from her, and Y/N was too engrossed with trying to pry her way out of the sheer bashfulness she was feeling so near around Bucky. Despite the fact that he was still a bit rusty, Bucky had liked the way he was already making her feel; he could practically feel the radiating heat from her flushed cheeks without even nearing the touch of her skin. It was pretty much enough to give him the right leverage to do more than just distract Y/N.

“Thaaanks…” Her lips were barely carrying the smooth, nonchalant laughter she intended that it came out rather nervous and squeaky, and Bucky found it so amusing to hear, “…u-uh Buck…c-can you excuse me for a moment?”

“Why?”

Y/N got herself cornered looking back into those alluring eyes of his.

“W-well I uh-you see it’s like-yeah uhm…” Now Y/N was even confused herself if the system lock was malfunctioning, or every single part of her common sense, “…t-the party-n-no I mean tonight-I-I need to talk to-A-Avengerss….”

Bucky didn’t realize how adorable Y/N looked so flustered up like that. It sent his lips curling into a smile went he let his imagination dance around his head with the thought of having Y/N melt in his touch, and it led him everywhere he wanted his hands to be on hers, and it soon had him bursting with a newfound confidence to shake off every ounce of awkwardness left in his bones.

“They’re not here.” He takes a pretending look around, with a slow shrug of his shoulders, making sure that his eyes land back on hers, “It’s just you and me.”

Both her eyes and mouth widened when realizing that he was right. But it was worth one more push to pry him off of her.

“W-where did they go?” She tried to pull the conversation back to a casual one, but the way he just looked at her differently, she knew she was losing to whatever Bucky was playing on her.

“Off to buy you some presents.” Bucky grins, while leaning his arm beside the wall to rest his body just close enough to lock her in her place.

“W-why?”

Because it was a bit odd that all of them except Bucky would be running off to buy her presents. But the more she tried to wire her brain to fire back up her skills in exemplary focus, she just couldn’t with having Bucky Barnes too close for her to even function properly with standing up straight.

“Why not?” Now Y/N was beginning to feel her heart thump too loudly when he began to take closer steps towards her, that she panicked and automatically strode backwards and found herself not being able to take her gaze off of his trance, “Why wouldn’t they lavish the special birthday girl with gifts that she deserves?”

This man was acting suspiciously out of character around her. And Y/N tried to find every reason she could think of to answer why but how her brain was juggling two thoughts all at once was knocking out every ounce of her well-trained skill.

“Y-you?” She was almost too speechless, but Bucky had picked it up.

“I already have mine.”

At the last word that rolled off his lips she felt the cool surface of the wall suppress her from walking back any further, and to her fear, had her right where Bucky wanted her.

Bingo.

Bucky watched Y/N heave out a breath in surrender. There was nowhere else to go, and Bucky made sure that she had a good and close view of him when she slowly lifted her eyes to look back at him.

Heaven be damned at such a gorgeous view Y/N had of Bucky Barnes, the closest she has even gotten to in months. And she marveled at how better his entire frame looked so damn close. The way his ocean blue eyes traced down every part of her frame, strands of his hair delicately sweeping at the side of his flushed cheeks that couldn’t beat the shade his smirked lips were showered with. This time Y/N let her eyes feast on a view lower, but ever so slowly enough to take in his breathtaking, massive form. She felt her breath hitch at the sight of part of his bare chest peeking from the fitted shirt that was barely able to hold back the shape of every curves of his muscular torso, and she could barely keep her sudden crave at bay. In every single detail she had grown to love so damn much, Bucky had never made her feel so captivated without even saying anything.

Despite the blush in her cheeks creeping slowly everywhere on her face, Y/N was admittedly loving Bucky’s alluring display at a distance just in hand’s reach.

“You look beautiful, Y/N.” He was so close, she could feel his breathe tickling on her skin that began to heat in longing for his against it.

Even Bucky himself was so perplexed at how he underestimated the beauty of this gorgeous woman. How delicate her bashfulness made her look, how prettily she blushed like that. But one look at her skin that showed only a portion from her neck down, he bit his lip at the thought of having every inch of her all on him, and it could be in a matter of seconds if Y/N didn’t stop looking so fucking irresistible to his taste, so he bit his lip to try and keep his desire controlled.

Bucky felt a deep craving for her, something that he was trying so hard to avoid over the past few months he only had her at his sight. And to think, all it took was one small mishap of a scheduled package to have her right where he wanted her that he was longing for months. Thank you, T’Challa.

“Bucky…” She breathes out a whimper, dangerously aware of him closing in, but could do nothing but helplessly look at his nearing lips, “… Y-you’re acting so weird today…”

"Y-you.." Y/N couldn't find where to place her hands so it began having a mind of its own and just went pointing at every inch of Bucky, "..y-you're talking to me."

For a moment Bucky blinked, "Yeah uh…I am?"

"Right I just um.." Y/N could only squint to Bucky's eyes staring her down, so to be careful not to get lost in them. "…you-me…we never talk like this."

He lets a deep chuckle rumble from his chest, and Y/N swore it sounded more like a growl enough for her to automatically bite her lip in suspense. Bucky was aware of the surprising amount of confidence he had all of a sudden, and it was only because he knew the truth that still had Y/N denying it through her pursed lips.

“Well I…” There it was. It was about to happen. "It's your birthday, Y/N."

"Aand? W-What's the difference today from the others?"

Another grin emerges from the corners of his lips. He did find the newfound confidence in him to be completely out of the silent character he had Y/N be used to. Bucky was beginning to like this new attitude he realized only Y/N was able to bring out of him.

"Well, I uh…" His gaze simmers down to a softer tone, "…I found out something today…"

It took Y/N less than seconds to know what he meant. His oddly sexy demeanor today, right on her birthday, made sense of it all. But what had Y/N hold her breath was he found it out, and she knew he was a bit dense to figure it out himself. Someone told him. Another feeling she tried to keep controlled was the sudden urge to open her mouth at a probable suspect such as Clint.

"Mmm?" Y/N hummed, trying to look cool when her whole body was already heating up.

"A little bird told me something that you've been hiding from me all these months we never talked."

Right. Shit. Clint was soo getting a clean knock on his head later.

"H-hiding? Me?" She tried to look innocent, but had the rest of her words tumbling down, "N-nooo I- what would I hide from-"

"Try hiding all you want; bat those pretty lashes of yours, keep telling me lies,"

Bucky paused, and it was to find the right words to say to her. Because that moment was it, it was happening. The one thing he could only dream of but never get a chance to actually do. This was the chance.

“Your trick may be working on me, but I already know the truth.”

His body was practically magnetizing hers, and she was almost too close to giving in. The suspense was slowly driving Bucky mad, but he knew it was what had Y/N holding onto every quick breath she took.

"Y/N…" The way her name slips off his mouth sounded gentler this time, letting a few quiet seconds pass while slowly pulling her hips closer, and the soft gasp she exhales drove him wild.

"Bucky…" He took the first move to slowly close the inches of a gap between his lips and hers. "…I-I…am completely confused right now…"

"Don't worry, doll." The way Bucky purred had Y/N completely entranced, "I have the answer to your problem."

It's really happening. Y/N couldn't find the urge to retaliate anymore, because Bucky himself was pulling her closer. It was beginning to be clear that Clint was right all along. So Y/N slowly begins to lean in as well, giving into her fast beating heart that screamed and craved to having him pressed against her in what was just about to be in seconds apart. She closes her eyes ever so slowly, raising her chin against his hot, fanning breath tickling her aching lips.

Right, until..

CCLLLAAANNNGG

“FUCK!”

A loud noise, followed by a voice broke throughout the entire room, bouncing right off the walls and breaking in between the two's momentary trance. Y/N’s eyes shot right open at Bucky’s bewildered ones. It was until the few remaining echoes of whatever made the noise began to process in both their heads. Not a good thing, though, for Y/N to instantly recognize what, who, and where it came from.

“Was…” At first she was uncertain, but still asked him nonetheless, “…w-was that Sam?”

Sam? Even Bucky had the same look of confusion knocking every last bit of that distractingly attractive look on his face. Until Sam’s voice replayed in his memory, and all too quickly, came in remembering the string of thoughts of the surprise birthday party bursting in with the sense of panic surging through his body. He was trying his best not to show it through his eyes so he blinked rather a bit too fast to still make it obvious enough for someone with Y/N skills in deducting.

“U-uh…no?” And Bucky had made the mistake of asking rather than answering.

Something didn’t click in Y/N’s head. The bat of her lashes along with the nagging thought of not figuring out the hell of what happened began to loosen the grip Bucky had once had around her.

“No Buck, don’t play me for a fool.” She pauses, “I know how Sam shouts when he drops something.”

Now Y/N had Bucky into a muttering mess, as he struggled to find the words to try and say to cover up the obvious sabotage to the entire plan, and his own plan of finally being able to pursue Y/N. He didn’t even know how to stop Y/N’s head for trying to make sense of the oddly misplaced mishap of hearing something she wasn’t supposed to hear.

Empty. With the circular sound of a bowl, probably plastic from the emanating sound not likewise to the sound of glass. And a voice from a man which seems out of place for an empty room?

“A-and I know what he dropped, and where he is.” Bucky, for once, hated how smart Y/N was and for not listening to Thor enough to not underestimate this woman’s intelligence.

He also hated how Sam, though not surprisingly, has ruined practically everything.

“I better check that out.”

Bucky had not realized that Y/N already had slipped from under his arms and making her way slowly towards the hallway, but he instinctively glid in front of her, which took her aback.

“I-I don’t think you should.” Y/N at first could vaguely make out of his nervous grin

“Bucky…” She raised her brows questioningly, “…why are you blocking me?”

Fuck. Bucky knew that he was the one on the hot seat right at that moment. He could do nothing but shrug sheepishly, something that one doesn’t usually see out of a mysterious assassin like him.

“I-I uh it well…” He was beginning to feel sweaty when Y/N crossed her arms in suspicion, “…I-It could be an…intruder! Yeah uhm, an intruder that sounds like Sam!”

Now Bucky was beginning to sound so silly. This had Y/N remembering that one time he broke one of Tony’s extremely fragile coffee machines that was just freshly manufactured out of his own hands. She could see every lie grow sillier and sillier each time it passes through his quivering lips. The same manner she was seeing right in front of her.

It finally clicked in her head.

“Ohhhh…you’re not hiding something, are you?” A grin began creeping up her lips, “On my birthday?”

“Noooo…” Bucky’s voice trailed off into a whisper with a tilt of his head to the right. Lie.

“You are. I’m checking whatever you hid down there right now.”

The surprise was officially 90% ruined.

“Y/N-NO!”

By then Bucky’s adrenaline response dialed up to 11. As Y/N abruptly turned her body away from him, in a split second his metal arm jerked to grab Y/N by her wrist, earning a loud pained gasp from her, and the rest began to happen in a quick blur.

She wasn’t even able to let a curse slip through her lips when Bucky had tugged her arm towards him and had her body colliding on his and his lips landing right on hers. Y/N was extremely startled at what just happened, but when it began to sink into her that she was being kissed by Bucky Barnes, having to feel his lips that was surprisingly so soft and warm, she soon felt her tensed body instantly ease into his arms tracing its way to take all over her frame.

Bucky had made it sure to move his lips in a pace enough for her to slowly fall into a trance. He too, soon began to realize he was kissing Y/N. At first his movements were hastened, still wanting to make sure that she wasn’t too startled or uncomfortable. Until he felt her returning the kiss with a long moan vibrating against his lips, and Bucky loved it.

In moments, he soon had his arms wrapped tightly around her waist, feeling his cheeks flush at the feeling of her body pulled closer and moving against his. And the way she was responding with hitched breaths and moans drove him to deliver as much as he can to keep his growing crave for more of her intoxicating touch.

“Buck…” her shaky breath could barely mutter at the uncontrollable feeling of falling back into his lip-lock.

“Sshhh…” He whispered against her mouth, as his still ached for more to kiss her back again.

At each second that passed they both felt the immense heat rising between them and they could both hardly keep it at bay. Just as Y/N was about to push him over the edge and tackle him down, he clung onto her body and let the spur of the moment drive her back against the wall with a loud thud. He felt her shudder when he deepens the kiss while grazing his tongue on her lips, and had her chasing him back in a silent beg to never leave them. And damn how he tasted so good.

It wasn’t until he could sense her arms wrapping around his neck with a few grips of his locks here and there when he kissed her just right to make a deep growl of content rumble right through his chest and onto hers. He chuckles softly and responds with his hands gliding down to reach for her legs and had her lifted with ease, earning another low moan of his name at his has tracing every curve of her thigh. Bucky was practically melting into this tight embrace of deep endearment between them, and he wished Y/N was just as pleased as she should be on her special day.

This was different. Not because he completely forgot that this was all a distraction plan, but because by then he could only feel the pure, raw feeling both of them had for each other in this sweet chase of ecstasy between them that had his heart thumping fast against hers, and he could hear their heartbeats as one. It wasn’t a distraction plan, it was real.

Midway into the moment escalating, he felt his lungs gasp for air and only then was able to pry himself away from her, but just ever so slightly still near enough to see the way her flushed lips puffed from all that irresistible kissing.

“Y/N…” He wasn’t sure if what had him breathless was either the kiss or her lovely features glowing in a way he hasn’t seen before.

“Damn…” She whispered as she tried to catch her breath, looking at Bucky in that way that had his mouth tickling with a growing smile, “…you hid that from me all this time? Where was I a few months ago?”

“I-I thought you didn’t like me.” He grinned sheepishly having only that excuse to say.

A loud, almost too scandalized gasp escapes her agape mouth to which Bucky found too amusing to suppress his heartfelt laughter, “Not like you?! Especially now that I know you kiss like that? Lies!”

Bucky’s laughter, once it filled her ears sounding like sweet music, it had her contagiously doing the same. And man, could he listen to her delight all day. As the laughter died down, his eyes simmered back lovingly in a gaze that admired that smile of hers, and knowing it was because of him had the same smile that felt like warm sunshine on her.

“Oh Bucky…” She coos softly, cupping his cheeks in her hands while letting her thumbs softly brush against his skin, “…I…I do like you. Hell, I think I’m falling in love with you.”

Bucky let out a breathy gasp at feeling his heart dance around the words it wished to hear. “You do?”

“So much.” She whispers back with every word coated with endearment, “I had no idea you felt the same way. I was beginning to think you didn’t.”

“God I do love you.” His voice grows deeper in a way Y/N knew he meant what he said.

“I was just having a hard time to accept the fact that I was flustering head over heels for you. I just didn’t know what to say. I thought I wasn’t good enough for you. So I tried to keep my distance, and you just seemed to agree to it, so I went along with it. But fuck, you were just too beautiful with your pretty little eyes, your enchanting laughter, your bright smile, your gorgeous figure; I-I tried so many damn times to break the barrier, because I could barely stand the thought that you were slipping away from my hands. But this…”

He gently tucks away a strand of her hair behind her ear, to get a better view of those dazzling eyes that was the first thing that drew him to believe he had a crush on her, “…you. Right here in my arms. I wish I could’ve done something earlier to get this lovely view of you near me sooner. Seeing every single bit of who you are this close, it just, it takes my breath away.”

Y/N felt so touched with his genuine endearment, it had her barely struggling to find the words that could amount to his poetic lines.

“I still can’t believe that someone so amazing like you would love someone like me back.” Bucky shakes his head affectionately with a warm smile, but Y/N felt the trail of doubt leaving from his mouth.

“Do I have to kiss you again to convince you that I do?” She wiggled her brows at him suggestively, and he liked the way she did that.

“Oddly, I’m tempted doll.” Y/N giggles at the touch of his nose on hers.

She takes a moment to pause and just savor at that man’s gorgeous features. It was radiating with a calmer aura, something she found herself feeling at home at. And she grew fond of the way his smile was adoring her, getting one for the take and press a quick gentle kiss on to steal it from his. It was still her birthday anyway, might as well take more than just a taste.

“So all this.” She says as she pulls away, “All this was some sort of a distraction plan?”

There was actually no more point to argue for Bucky, since it wasn’t his fault she had it figured out. “Yeah yeah…I uh, actually didn’t expect it to work too well.”

“For a moment, you did get me with that hot bod of yours.” Y/N admitted with a playful bite of her lip. “And that was Sam I heard?”

“I think the entire team’s pissed off at him right now, let’s just leave him be.”

“So it was a surprise party!”

He blinked at her smart guess. “Y-Yeah, you got us.”

“And the entire team is in here!”

And oddly, he loved the way she was so proud and giddy of her achievement in finding out herself. Damn, a confident Y/N close to him was better than a bashful one from afar. “I didn’t know you were this enigmatic.”

“And I didn’t know you didn’t know that I knew and blah blah blah blah…” To this Bucky chuckled at. There were too many words apart from Y/N and Bucky’s lips that she decided to dismiss all the talk and press her lips once more onto his, missing the way it felt so good a while ago.

This one was a sweeter version of what they shared from before. It was a sort of deep acknowledgement between them, now that all confusion was gone and nothing but deep affection for each other was blossoming in their chest and through their lips. To which Y/N hummed in delight to, since she finally got that only present she’s been wanting all day long, that whatever party she or the team had planned wasn’t at the top of her priority list for the day.

Because all she had her head wrapped around was all on him. All on him.

“Oh wait, that reminds me.” A thought pops up in his head when she pulls away momentarily, “You should still go in that room and see what the team has prepared for you. Pretend to act surprised for Sam’s sake.”

“Awww do I have to?” She whines with a pout of her lips like a child would on her birthday, “Can’t that wait until later? It’s my birthday anyway and I get to choose what I want to doooo…”

“Why? Do you have something important to do?”

Y/N was amused at Bucky’s cluelessness to her small hints. She lets out a small giggle before biting her lip to give him a head start. “You, you silly idiot.”

“Ooohhh…”

The moment Bucky gets it he bites his lips playfully as well, scrunching his nose at Y/N’s smooth line. He was glad to grant the birthday girl’s wish at the sight of another door leading to a spare bedroom. And how he was turned on by the way Y/N looked right at him that sent his mind wandering to intimate thoughts shared with her body all over his. He couldn’t careless of the initial plan and had his impatience drove his arms to swiftly carry her towards the said room.

“Well then, wait until you unwrap my present to you.” He purrs against her ear, giving it a little nudge before pressing her back against the door. “Fuck, I love you Y/N.”

“I love you to Bucky…” Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine at the sound of his raspy voice, grinning to herself at the thought of such a surprising gift, “…Happy fucking birthday to me.”

And just like that, Bucky did not waste his time with her any longer and had his hand grasping for the doorknob as the other quickly pulls her in for a hungrier kiss she finds herself sinking back into. And they let themselves fall into each other’s embrace, their thoughts playing into reality with intimate touches at the close of the door.

--- BONUS: ---

“Took him damn long enough.” Sam chuckles at finding out that their friend finally made his move.

"If it wasn't for you fucking it all up with that popcorn bowl you ‘accidentally’ dropped." Tony rolls his eyes, something that Sam dismisses annoyingly at. “Wanda clearly warned you to duck.”

"What's the word on the lovebirds Wanda?" Clint leans in closer to Wanda, who had her thoughts linked to hear both Y/N's and Bucky's.

She only gasps with a cheeky grin on her face as a response. To this the whole team had known what was spiraling down from the sound of the door across theirs slamming shut.

"Lucky punk." Steve shakes his head, to which Bruce gives an acknowledging pat on his back with a chuckle.

"So much for the package." Tony sighs. "And the party."

"I taught him well." Natasha helped herself to a smug grin.

"Lady Y/L/N's fantasies finally came true." Thor wriggles his eyebrows in agreement to Natasha.

"Are we still pushing through with this party?" Wanda could barely suppress her amused giggles, shutting off her powers to give the two enraptured lovers their privacy. "They seem very engrossed in whatever they're doing."

"Welp, seems like this party's postponed." He knew that look on Wanda's face, Clint knew. "The distraction plan did work but their having a little party of their own now."

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Heeyyy guys!! So wow, this one had a whopping 5k+ words. It really took a long LONG process to finally have my head click with the right words and plot. But again, I’m so happy with the overwhelming response to the first part. THANK YOU as well for reading this imagine and for the support. Here’s to more imagines! <333

BUCKY BARNES DESERVES BETTER I AM NOT CEASING TO SCREAM THIS EVERYWHERE

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roxxdafoxx · 4 years

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Why I stopped celebrating the holidays...

for me holidays were always a disappointment the decision to not celebrate the holidays can save you money and your sanity its definitely a “rich mans holiday” my grandmother always made it a point to make sure i felt valued she always got me a gift and a birthday cake My great grandmother an I shared the same birth date and having a birthday with my great grandmother was the best now with the exception of a few cousins and my children now that my entire family is dead and after spending every holiday in the hospital ive had a lot of time spent in isolation to learn and get to know myself and God on a more intimate and deeper level not being with family always being depressed during the holidays made me realize why am i allowing these holidays cause me anxiety get me all upset about being able to afford gifts for everyone especially when u have a big heart and the desire to give to everyone id give to almost everyone in the entire world if i could but feeling that way during holidays never sat right with me it would ruin my mood my self esteem/self worth i would feel i had no value like i was never good enough no matter hat i did or gave would never be good enough i would find myself damn near balled up in a corner crying on a day that was supposed to be happy my birthday being so close to christmas put my birthday in the my mind in the “you dont matter box” lol im sure most can relate if their birthday is during that time when most people are getting ready for the holidays while everyone else gets both a birthday present and a christmas present for christmas babies your lucky if you even get a gift in general trying to throw a party around that time is equally as difficult people are just too busy the holiday its supposed to be about Jesus and his birth and birthday although its not even the day he was born a lot of people aint even really thinking about Jesus at all some celebrate christmas and dont even believe in God its just tradition for them and a reason to celebrate and get gifts and its origins have nothing to do with God!!! The origin of Christmas is completely opposite of what most think theyre celebrating and most are in denial that they continue to celebrate a lie with a dark origin they say halloween is a devils holiday but Christmas is too!! the reason the birth of Jesus is not listed in the bible is because God never planned or commanded us to celebrate his birth because he doesnt have a birthdate he has always existed the bible even calls it foolishness (Jer 10) this is the reason people cant wait for the holiday cram to be over with because theyre busy trying to please everyone except God being selflessly selfish and putting themselves into debt is that really the correct way to show people that you care? When u travel a bit when u go through some things when u see people struggle just to have a roof over their head are homeless or living in a shelter or if you think of people in other countries who are just grateful for a pair of old worn out shoes you realize how vain the holidays really are the bible even calls it “vanity” when you look at all the beautiful decorations all the money spent on trees and lights etc u start to see it for what it really is its all “vanity” please believe im not being judgemental i celebrated this holiday before i somewhat celebrated it even tho i was in the hospital i mean you really cant avoid the celebration because the majority is celebrating and it will trickle its way on down to you in one way or another for instance i no longer celebrate and this is my first year deciding not to the nurses bought me gifts along with a santa claus hat that ive been wearing because i love hats its warm im into costumes and fashion but even fashion can be considered vanity we have put ourselves in a place and position that we forgot where we came from and what our ancestors went through.. I loved planning birthdays and surprises for friends, but when it came to me, the favor was never returned. That's when I realized that planning my own birthday or holidays or others birthdays that it was too much pressure trying to please others. it still makes you feel inadequate and terrible. nobody cares Let's be real Everyone is already in debt. Your birthday just became another errand on their daily to-do list. If you invite a lot of people they dont show up or might not bring anything some folks just really are there for the food and a party could care less about you but its just something to do it could mean you have false friendships/relationships in general and you're just there hoping for gifts even fake friends buy gifts too u just never know .... the dark origins is really what made me give up on holidays valentines day is supposed to be about love but i never felt more unloved than on that day halloween aka “the devils day” you get more gifts of candy from strangers than any other holiday ironically and its like the day where being scared is supposed to be fun the bible clearly states fear is not of God a lot of people like that stuff and like the feeling of being afraid until its a real situation then its not so fun.. i can barely watch horror films i honestly dont know how people come up with these crazy scary movies how do they film them write them and play these characters i mean acting is most def a talent...If you’ve never researched where our Christmas traditions come from, if interested in the truth look into it. I started to share them here, but it would take me FOR.EV.ER. to go through all of the names, dates, traditions, etc. But look into where Dec. 25th came from. the Yule log, the Christmas tree and its ornaments and lights, holly, mistletoe, wreaths, the Christmas ham… look up Winter Solstice and Saturnalia. If you are really interested in knowing where your traditions come from and what they mean… do some studying.Suffice it to say, what we are doing when we partake of the traditions of Christmas is nothing more than imitating the pagan’s worship of the sun god. And i no longer can stand to have any part of spitting in the face of God. (Sorry, I know that sounds harsh, but this is how it makes me feel.)For a long time I tried to rationalize that it was okay to continue enjoying the festivities. After all, we weren’t doing it to worship a sun god, we were honoring the birth of Christ! Right? Well, after much prayer and studying God’s word, one day the Lord revealed this analogy to me.Let’s just say that your spouse has cheated on you. After all, the Lord does call his people an “adulterous bride” after they went chasing pagan gods.Let’s say that your cheating spouse has come back to you, and asked your forgiveness. All has been made right again.Now, let’s say it’s your birthday. And your spouse wants to honor you on this day. (Although, in an appropriate analogy the celebration wouldn’t even be on your actual birthday!its on the other womans/guys birthday)But instead of giving you gifts that you have clearly expressed a desire for, your spouse gives you things that his lover enjoyed! He made his/her favorite foods, wanted to enjoy his/her favorite activities with you, lavished you with things that would have delighted him/her! Now, would this honor you? Would you feel loved and esteemed in this situation? Of course not!!! You’d be Livid!!! Is this not what we do to Christ, when we say that we are honoring Him by means of pagan traditions!? Being me,.. I wanted to find something in Scripture to solidify my convictions. Would God see the intentions of my heart, and understand that I’m just trying to please Him? Or would He be angry as I know I would be in that situation?...YHWH brought me to Exodus 32, the story of the Golden Calf. Remember that one? Moses had gone up onto the mountain to speak with God (and bring down the 10 commandments), but he took so long in coming that the people began to wonder what had happened to him. They asked Aaron to make a golden calf for them to worship, and he did so. But I thought this was fascinating, in verse 5 of that same chapter Scripture says, “And when Aaron saw it (the golden calf), he built an altar before it; and Aaron made proclamation, and said, Tomorrow is a feast to the LORD.”Do you see what he was doing? The people had fallen back into pagan practices, and were worshiping an idol, yet saying it was to honor God!! The next verse goes on to say,“And they rose up early on the morrow, and offered burnt offerings, and brought peace offerings; and the people sat down to eat and to drink, and rose up to play.”Wow. Sounds like they were having a very fun celebration, huh?! Did the Lord look at the rejoicing of their hearts and feel honored? Let’s find out…In verses 7-9, YHWH speaks to Moses and tells him what the people are doing. He says that they have “corrupted themselves”, and “turned aside quickly out of the way which I commanded them”.Then in verse 10, YHWH says, “Now therefore let me alone, that my wrath may wax hot against them, and that I may consume them…”.He was SO ANGRY! He was ready to destroy them all! Evidently, He was not pleased at the way they were trying to honor Him… mixing worship with pagan traditions. Mixing the holy with the unholy. water oil Vinegar type mix Just. Like. Christmas.....As I continued to study, I also came to 1 Samuel 15…This is where King Saul went out to destroy the Amalekites. But the Lord specifically told him (through Samuel) that he was to “utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not; but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling, ox and sheep, camel and donkey.” (verse 3)But if you read on, you’ll find in verse 21 that they did not do as the Lord had commanded, and had in fact brought back with them the best of the sheep and oxen instead of killing them. Of course, when Samuel confronts him about it, Saul rationalizes that they did it “to sacrifice unto the LORD”.Here again, man is disobeying the Lord’s commands, yet saying he is doing so to try to please God. What does the Lord say? Verse 22-23, “And Samuel said, Hath the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to “OBEY” is better than sacrifice”!!!, .For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.”God didn’t want the sacrifices. He wanted obedience!!!.Here’s another in Deuteronomy 12:29-31; He is speaking to the Israelites before they go into the promised land,“When Yahweh your Elohim cuts off from before you the nations which you go to dispossess, and you displace them and dwell in their land, take heed to yourself that you are not ensnared to follow them, after they are destroyed from before you, and that you do not inquire after their gods, saying, `How did these nations serve their gods? I also will do likewise.’You shall not worship Yahweh your Elohim in that way; for every abomination to Yahweh which He hates they have done to their gods…”We are specifically told NOT to worship God with the ways of the pagans!! Jesus himself said in Matthew 15:7-9, “Ye hypocrites, well did Isaiah prophesy of you, saying, This people draweth nigh unto me with their mouth, and honoureth me with their lips; but their heart is far from me. But in vain they do worship me, teaching for doctrines the commandments of men.”I don’t want to worship in vain, forsaking the commandments of God and clinging to the traditions of men. (also in Matt. 15:3)I don’t want to have anything to do with the unholy.Ephesians 5:11, “And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them.”In fact, the recurring theme all throughout Scripture is for God’s people to NOT follow the way of the pagans (in other words, go along with what the rest of the unbelieving world does), but to be set apart as holy, and to honor YHWH by obeying His commandments!If we profess to worship the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Israel, then we cannot ignore the very character of God as repeated to us throughout Scripture. He is a loving God, yes, but He is also a jealous God. He will not share His people with idols.“For thou shalt worship no other god: for the LORD whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God.” Exodus 34:14 But let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that Christmas traditions don’t really have pagan roots. Let’s just pretend that’s a bunch of baloney.Even still, nowhere in Scripture is it commanded to remember the birth of Christ. In fact, what we are commanded to celebrate are the Biblical Feasts of the Lord (given in Lev. 23), including Passover in remembrance of Christ’s death. Yet, far too many Christians have never even heard of the seven Feasts of the Lord, or they think they are “Jewish” celebrations. Scripture doesn’t call these holy days (not holidays) “Jewish feasts”, but the LORD’s Feasts. And everyone who calls himself a child of Elohim is to keep them. Forever.And so, we have chosen to give the Lord the gifts He has specifically requested, and honor Him through celebrating and remembering the Feasts of the lord.Loved ones, I know that Christmas is a special time of year, and that people get very caught up in its traditions and festivities. But our hearts yearn to honor the Lord… above all else. And this is something that i feel is non-negotiable.So, im saying “No”: to the holiday rush, and fighting over the latest toys for my kids, and inflatable yard decorations, and the lies of a bearded man who claims to have the powers of God (all seeing, all knowing, all present), and the Great Big Toys “R” Us Book, and “Yuletide” carols, and guilt induced credit card spending, and drunken company Christmas parties, and everything else that the world gets so wrapped up in during this time of year.For me, it really only comes down to one thing:“If you love me, keep my commandments.” John 14:15 And I think I’ve laid out pretty clearly what i believe the Lord expects from us. one holiday i like which is the 4th of july because it summer and there’s fireworks in the sky and bbq but what is the true origin of 4th of july? i wish we didn’t have to have wars i wish people could just live and let live without hurting anyone why steal why not just learn from each other share a world without greed would be beautiful but also when u have nothing really left and after you have gotten rid of all the fake people in your life u find no real reason to celebrate if you have no one to celebrate with with my family all passing away the money has been short after being locked up in an institution it puts a damper on things i feel like these holidays are made up just to make the rich get rich yes we all want to have fun and have a good time but id rather celebrate with the right people for the right reason without any ulterior motives that battle against principalities ans spiritual wickedness against rulers of darkness evil spirits in high places the fowl of the air id much rather sell things to people who do celebrate these holidays because at least it can help with bills instead of be a hindrance and burden in my life i’m not judging anyone who celebrates holidays i use to celebrate them too i’m just sharing why i have chosen not to honestly i celebrate everyday i buy gifts throughout the year why celebrate when the government wants us to? so they can capitalize on the citizens have us participate in their hellenistic rituals that we aren’t even made aware of until we do the homework and learn about them for ourselves these traditions were forced on us we weren’t given a choice and to think we were told that by celebrating these days we are honoring God and all along we arent we are honoring other gods celebrating holidays that have origins of other gods and not the true God the bible doesn’t encourage us to entertain these practices why even celebrate anything that has the potential to be a set up for disappointment by not celebrating it eliminates any expectation of having a day that you really only see in the movies on the hallmark channel i’ve also noticed people dread and just cant wait for it to be over like a funeral and its supposed to be a joyful prosperous time its even programmed to be called the most wonderful time of the year i tell ya satan is a sly trickster i chose life and freedom from the imprisonment that i feel when it comes to the holidays so while everyone else is celebrating i decided to be happy and enjoy myself in my own company with God the real comforter snuggled up to him in worship and gratefulness as an introvert id rather spend the days away from all of that i enjoy being an introvert i enjoy being in my own company creating with the creator holding me down and uplifting me and perhaps the holidays have turned me into a “scroogey your highness grinch” because i view things differently now but with that comes the freedom of me not having to do what everyone else is doing setting myself apart from the masses (mass level of destruction lol insider) i’m living my life by my rules by my preferences and spending time with God my best friend God never asked for anything but for us to live right and be holy because he is holy this is something to be celebrated always everyday everyday is our unbirthday one day out of the year is a day we were born on and we shouldn’t feel pressured or disappointed because someone didn’t get us a gift or acknowledge the fact that we are here another year and alive if anything we should spend our birthday alone with God because for sure its facts that you’ll feel value and loved in the arms of God i feel we should do something special for ourselves no one will ever love us like God can no one will ever love us like the self love we give ourselves truth be told people will always fail u people will not always be there for you people die there are no guarantees in life except the existence of God and his everlasting word anything else is temporary everything we see will one day no longer be so i make it a point not to depend on external happiness internal happiness is the greatest gift we can give to ourselves always do you stay true to yourself get rid of old habits that dont benefit your soul and be happy do what makes you happy there’s always room to learn more and to improve in certain areas in your life in all areas a friend once told me and it will forever stick with me and that is we aren’t perfect we are not all knowing we are forever learning and correcting things we are all a work in progress give to others keep yourself in alignment with the word of God by giving to others its like youre giving to God and it will be given back to you within the same measure you gave with so just be a happy cheerful giver give from you’re entire heart good things will happen just dont give and expect something back giving to receive doesn’t work like that...another thing don’t wait for their birthday or a man made holiday to do things for people some might not even live to see another birthday this kinda follows the saying don’t wait till i’m dead to buy me flowers or wait till im gone to finally miss me invite someone to dinner just because why wait until thanksgiving to feast and be thankful around your loved ones thanksgiving a day where we are actually celebrating stealing the land from the people who were already here thats like allowing someone to move in with you you teach them how to grow food and make a living for themselves and then they rob you and kick you out of your own home and force you to pay them to live in the street and first and foremost last but most assuredley not least never allow the holidays to validate you your value doesnt depend on gifts u get or didnt get or the people around you i like small numbers i think God prefers small numbers too because quality is and always will be better than quantity id rather have 1 real friend than a thousand fake friends even if my only friend is myself i remember in elementary school they would give out secret candies on valentines day some student s would recieve like 30 gifts because either they were that much admired and popular or they bought themselves gifts and made it look like someone else did it for them to make themselves appear to be better but i wonder if fake love makes them feel better its kinda like today how they buy followers do me a favor be happy keep the fake stuff to the side seek to be happy internally so nothing or no one can take that from u people and material things are all external things theyre all temporary the things money cant buy the things we cant see are the more permanent things our bodies are also temporary but these souls of ours are gonna be with us a lot longer so make sure you take good care of it and of you real love is internal and eternal and its the best gift we can give to ourselves signed #EternallyYours #EternalLove

#EternallyYours EternalLove InternalLove #God WhyINoLongerCelebrateChristmas WhyINoLongerCelebrateHolidays #Love #WhyINoLongerCelebrateChristmas #WhyINoLongerCelebrateHolidays

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marauder--harder · 7 years

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CONGRATS ON 1K, MY LOVE! IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!! Can I get a marauders ship? I think you probably know me well enough that I don't need to include a description, but you can always message me if you do!!! (Also this is Renee/goblackhatwithme 😉)

Renee! My dude, my darling, my ever-loving doll, thank you. I hope you enjoy your ship, b.

(Note: Sorry, but Renee, as my OG number one, she gets slight special treatment. Don’t kill me. :) )

ERA: Founders | Riddle | Marauders | Lightning | Next Gen

HOUSE: Slytherin | Gryffindor | Ravenclaw | Hufflepuff

WHO I SHIP YOU WITH: Remus John Lupin!

YOUR BEST FRIEND AT HOGWARTS: Sirius Black.

BLOOD STATUS: Muggle-born | Half-blood | Pure-blood

PET: Owl | Toad | Cat | Rat | Something Hagrid would smuggle in

FAVORITE SPELL: Riddikulus. You always could enjoy the fact that you had control over the things that you feared. It felt like you could have a better grip on things when things became too much.

SHIP NAME: Renmus. (But everyone just calls you Mrs. Moony)

WHO KISSED WHO FIRST: You | Him

WHO SAID I LOVE YOU FIRST: You | Him

WHO IS MORE PROTECTIVE: You | Him

HEADACANONS:

so like I feel like y’all would be couple goals (which only hurts my Remus loving heart slightly)

Like you guys are the best support system duo

People need advice- they go to the wise couple; People need a favor- they go to the couple who somehow can pull strings with everyone??

And somehow, you both become the ‘mom and pop’ type couple.

Which is slightly strange because neither of you act too motherly or fatherly

But Remus suspects it is because you both have been through a lot together.

But that doesn’t mean y’all don’t fight

Because we all know that you guys can bicker like a married couple because “Remus, no, I am positive that you have to use the dragon horn for that.” - “Renee, for the last time you have to use the dragon blood.” (it was really the liver, but Lily would never get in the middle of your bickering.)

and both of you have bad days (and sometimes bad weeks)

But you use it to your advantage in your relationship, and somehow come out stronger because of it

Because, Remus knows just when you need a good hug and when to just let you be for a bit. He respects your boundaries, and never pushes.

And you know just how to get right through the wall he puts up sometimes with a simple kiss or touch

James and Sirius are honestly kind of scared by how well you know each other (better than you know yourselves, they’re sure)

Speaking of the boys, they adore you with Remus.

Sirius is very happy, and as your certified best friend (yes, he calls himself that), he must approve of everyone you date.

Ugh, Renee and Remus would be couple goals and honestly breaks my heart. (in the best way)

CHECK UNDER THE CUT FOR THE LIL EXTRA THING, DOLL!

BLURB: (Whoops?)

Laying down on Remus’ bed, you waited for the boys to return from their late night sneak out. You were sure that they were up to some sort of mischief, as they couldn’t possibly be doing anything else at this hour. The four boys were constantly up to something, and one of these days you knew it was going to backfire. You had to just wait for their return to hear about the next prank they were most likely trying to pull on someone.

Sighing deeply, you rolled over and sank deeper into his sheets. They smelled strongly of Remus, a comforting scent you have grown to love over the years. It smelled like home.

Slowly, you started drifting off, and blinked slowly to try and keep your eyes from drooping. It was a long day, and you just wanted Remus to cuddle with. Glancing over at the clock, you checked the time. You really wanted to stay up long enough for Remus to come back. Truth be told, it was always a lot harder sleeping without him near; a thought you had yet to admit to yourself even if you knew it was true. You refused to seem clingy. As an young witch, you prided yourself on not being dependent on primarily anyone. Although, after long days like these, you often felt your ideals crumbling as you yearned for your boyfriend’s comforting embrace.

You did not remember falling asleep, only the slight shuffle of the bed sheets rustling that woke you and the pull as you were now flush against someone.

“So, was it the Slytherin common room, or Filch’s office?” You asked sleepily.

He chuckled softly and kissed the back of your head firmly. “Neither. Just go back to sleep, love. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I was up.” A blatant lie, but you didn’t want to go back to sleep yet.

“Sure you weren’t. I’ll tell you in the morning. Sleep now.” Another kiss, placed on your exposed shoulder.

You smiled softly and nodded, reaching down and interlacing your fingers in his. “M’kay. G’night Moony.”

“Good night, Renee. Love you.”

Remus took in a deep breath and smiled as he listened to your breathing slow, a clear indication that you had fallen back asleep. He thought back to the fluttering in his heart when he walked in and saw you sleeping peacefully in his bed, obviously waiting for him to return with the boys.

Pulling you slightly closer in his arms, he relaxed quickly. You always had that effect on him, and he loved it. Still not all too tired, he laid there for quite some time just listening to your soft, rhythmic breathing. He had been out with the boys planning, and was still slightly wired for the big surprise tomorrow. He wasn’t pulling a prank on any house, but rather it was a surprise for you as your anniversary was coming up. You were never one for big displays so you grew wary on the days leading up to any anniversaries or birthdays. So, he chose to surprise you a week early so you didn’t suspect him of anything.

Slowly, he felt his eyes droop slightly and he fought for them to stay open just a little bit longer. He wanted to commit this moment to memory. The warmth of having you pulled flush against him. How your hair tickled his neck slightly. The sweet smell of your shampoo calming him. Yet, he fought in vain. His long night, and the calming feeling coursing through him left him contentedly sleepy. He closed his eyes and fell asleep, happily awaiting waking up next to you come morning.

To request a ship or blurb, check out Kay’s 1k Celebration!!

#kay's 1k celebration #ships #goblackhatwithme #renee #my love

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cyjprojectarchive · 7 years

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happy birthday, king jackson | jackson

group: GOT7 pairing: jackson wang, you genre: fluff words: 2826 note: just in time until his birthday ends. this wasn’t the expected route of the short imagine but hey, i think it turned out pretty sweet. it’s my very first got7 imagine, pls be gentle ;~; & thank you for reading. we don’t deserve our wang puppy at all. ugh. i love him.

“okay, you guys ready to be on standby?” “yes, ma'am!” you laugh at bambam’s enthusiastic reply. he was squished in the center between his ultimate best friend, yugyeom, and hyung, mark, on the long couch of their dorm back in south korea. the other 6 members of got7 graciously agreed to the surprise mini birthday celebration you had planned out for your boyfriend, jackson, the 7th member of the group. “again, thank you so much for doing this! it’ll make jackson so happy as he misses you guys a lot,” you comment, sitting at the edge of the hotel bed and looking straight at your laptop screen, skype on full desktop mode. “no worries. and hey, we miss jackson too. we’re glad he’s fully recovered to have celebrated his birthday there in hong kong,” jinyoung joins in the conversation, trying to fit himself in the view of the webcam as he was on the very end of the couch from the left. “so you two are flying back here tomorrow evening, i suppose?” jaebum asks,eyes squinting at the screen as if to discern your background. “you in a hotel room? are you sure you want us to watch?” he added, a sly smirk starting to play on his lips. mark immediately punches the leader’s arm and the latter only snickered. youngjae and yugyeom looks offended at his hyung’s insinuation of the situation. “i thought we were greeting jackson hyung a happy birthday,” the maknae trails off to himself. bambam laughs at his friend’s innocence and jinyoung only sighed, shaking his head. you blush a crimson red- you were totally getting im jaebum for that once you and jackson come back. after the short shenanigans, you hear a familiar ringtone emanating from your phone on the kitchen counter. it was your boyfriend’s assigned ringtone for when he calls you. he was probably done celebrating with his family and was on his way to your hotel. “is that… our confession song?” bambam exclaims, excitement and mockery evident in his voice. you are tempted to end the call right there and then as you had a feeling all six of them were going to start teasing you, but your composure remained intact. standing up, you shush the boys and tell them to keep quiet as you turn the laptop facing the wall. they all nod, some reluctantly as their giggles fail to be kept hidden in their lips. you literally just got back from the bakeshop to get jackson a cake roll and you weren’t able to chill it in the fridge because you went to call the guys on skype first, making sure they remembered your request. it hasn’t been that long as you’ve already briefed them yesterday about this surprise greeting they’ll give jackson over skype, so the cake isn’t that melted yet. grabbing your phone on one hand and the cake box on the other, you accept the call as you walk to the fridge. “jagi, were you in the bathroom? took you a while to answer.” as usual, jackson’s playfulness shows through his voice and his corny jokes. you smile to yourself and roll your eyes, sliding the box ever so slightly onto one of the racks and closing the door gently. “ha-ha, don’t you insult my bowel movements, wang.” “insult? i was complimenting you for it!” he defends, chuckling through his words. “how’s my girl? i miss you already.” you can’t help but widen your smile a little bit more- okay, let’s admit it, a whole lot more. his words never fail to warm your heart and every other parts of your body- even if it was his special day today, he made you feel so special every day. “i’m great, jacks. i miss you too, but you were out with your family and aren’t you on your way here right now? just be patient for a bit more,” you encouraged him. you hear him whine on the phone, just like a tiny pupper asking for his person to give him love and cuddles. “i knoooow that but can’t a man miss his girlfriend when she’s not around? oh, and i’m not on my way, babe.” “oh,” you blurt out, surprised. “then where are -” “i’m right here!” jackson’s voice booms through. your eyes widen and your palms start to sweat in just a millisecond; you aren’t done preparing the room at all! you still have some strings and balloons to decorate the place up!

“j- jackson! what are you doing here?” you ask, overwhelmed by his presence.

walking closer to you, it was almost reflex that you two share a quick peck on the lips once you see each other, but jackson had other things in mind this time.

you notice him gingerly place a paper bag on top of where the cake box was placed and quickly rest both his hand on your waist, gripping you slightly tighter as your chest collides with his with a soft thump. your heart falls limp at his intimate touches as your arms respond by wrapping them securely around his neck.

your lips perfectly connect with his. softly you express your genuine love and so did he. your moan quietly escapes in the heat of it all and that just made jackson even more excited to hold you as he soon grabs your thighs and carries you over to let you sit on the counter, your legs automatically clinging to his torso.

you no longer have any other thoughts in your mind except this- this loving and intimate moment you have with the love of your life.

and it seemed as if he was content with it as well.

tongue pulsing through your mouth, you open them nervously but jackson reassured you by caressing the side of your cheek. you share a minute of tongues dancing together in ultimate passion and your hands messily messing his already disheveled black hair.

his hands find their way to the waistband of your jeans, and before you give him access, your eyes shot open from the blissful experience you’re having, and your lips breaking the lock it has been in with jackson.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!” you shout at his face directly.

he blinks. twice. face flush with the intimacy you shared and now with confusion as to why you decided to end it so abruptly.

your words trigger the awaiting group still on skype as you finally hear a chorus of “happy birthdays” blasting through the speakers of your laptop. jackson jumps at the sound, moving his head in all directions to locate the source.

“c'mon, show us the birthday boy!” mark’s cheerful voice calls out from the screen. you hop off the counter, your legs still jelly from the previous endeavor you shared with jackson but you tried your best to grab your still confused boyfriend to sit at the edge of the bed. you finally turn the laptop to face him and his expression changes to that of utter glee. “h-hey guys! what’s going on?” “it’s your birthday! and we’re greeting you happy birthday!” youngjae replies with a grin and a thumbs up. “all the way from our dorm! we miss you hyung~!” bambam adds, pouting his lips for emphasis. jackson scoffs at this and you realize his hands sneaking up to rest on your waist as you sit next to him. your cheeks are still warm and your chest numb. did they hear? are they playing dumb that they didn’t hear you basically having a heated make out session with jackson? “did you set them up to do this?” jackson turns to you and immediately all the anxiety bubbling up in your system is replaced with warm fuzzy feelings again. his eyes are glinting with pride for his thoughtful girlfriend and you reciprocated by nodding your head and kissing his cheek. “they wanted to be a part of your birthday even if you’re all far away from each other right now.” “aww, you guys really love me so much, don’t you?” “don’t push it, jackson,” jaebum warns him. they all laugh and soon you left the boys to chat to themselves. you took out the cake that has only stayed in the fridge for a few minutes and also the box inside the bag jackson brought back. it was leftovers from the dinner he had with his family a while ago. you smile to yourself as you prepare a set of two plates and utensils. resting your head on the palm of your hand, you watch jackson mindlessly catch his friends up with the recent happenings in his life which were hospital admissions, check ups, sleep and a whole lot of soup for recovery. he asks the boys how the comeback has been and you can witness pure happiness exuding off of him. his presence is truly missed during the group’s recent performances, but you’re glad that he’s fully healed and ready to be reunited with six of his closest friends- and with his fans, of course. “babe, was there supposed to be decorations up tonight?” your thoughts dismantle as jackson’s question brings you back to the situation at hand. bringing your palm to the back of your head instead, you nod shyly. “you got here too early for me to put them up. i only have cake to celebrate with you,” you admit. jackson brings the laptop to the kitchen counter where your little late night dinner set up was placed. the boys on the screen look at you curiously.

“this is more than enough, jagiya. i can’t thank you enough for doing all of this for me,” jackson tells you, his smile reaching his eyes. “oh jackson, you deserve so much more.” you hug him tight, squeezing yourself into him as if eliminating any kind of space between you. “okay, if you guys are going to start getting all mushy, we’re ending the call now,” jinyoung disrupts the moment with his annoyed voice and the boys back him up by shouting “boo’s” or “ew’s” or “get a room.” on one hand, you shake your hand at their comments but on the other, you silently thank the gods out there because it seemed as if they weren’t witnesses to your private intimacies some moments ago.

“no but seriously though, you guys should enjoy jackson hyung’s last hours of his birthday! we’ve done our part, and we’ll be seeing you tomorrow anyway,” bambam suggests.

“yeah, let’s give them their privacy for now,” youngjae nods in agreement.

“they’ll need their privacy, all right,” a certain leader mumbles with a hint of teasing. mark, once again, almost seemed to contemplate punishing him, but eventually decided. to just roll his eyes. “jb hyung, stop it!” yugyeom protests, frowning at their leader’s intense teasing. he only snickers. “fine, fine. i’ll stop the teasing. for now. so better come back in tip top shape, wang.”

“aye, captain,” jackson assures all of them, putting his hand against his forehead for exaggeration. they all wave goodbye and you thank them one last time before the call ended.

“you think they heard us?” you ask quietly once the laptop has been settled to the side and jackson sits in front of you. he shakes his head, “i don’t think so. we were pretty quiet, surprisingly.”

“i got carried away!” you huff, crossing your arms in the process. jackson laughs and takes your hand encouragingly, kissing your knuckles one by one with such grace and softness. your heart begins to race yet again.

“seriously, jagiya, thank you. so much. even if your decorations weren’t put up, i appreciate the thought of all of this. for me,” he confesses, finishing with one last lingering kiss on the back of your hand. you let your fingers brush his hair, his face, and his neck. feeling him, and knowing he’s all better and fully rested right in front of you, there’s nothing more you want in this moment than to just stare at such masterpiece.

“careful, baby or you might drool all over the cake you bought me!” jackson mocks your trance and so your gentle caress turns into a playful slap against his cheek. he feigns pain and groans loudly. “agh! my face! my beautiful, adonis face!” “shut up wang, or you won’t have even a single piece of this cake,” you challenge him, the grin on your face threatening to show.

he clutches his heart in a dramatic way, facial features matching the phony agony he was presenting to you. “but you bought that for me! jackson wang, your boyfriend!” “i don’t recall my boyfriend being too full of himself.” he shrieks in offense yet again. “i yearn to see the day that vanity is seen as something positive in our world! were recognizing features of yourself you think are worth announcing to is a sign of extreme self-confidence!” he pounds his chest proudly, eyebrows scrunch together with much focus. you aren’t able to hold in your façade as you burst into laughter, absolute admiration in every breath of air you exert out of you. jackson sees your carefree form and joins in. after much exhaustion, the both of you relax into each other’s gazes. “happy birthday, jackson. i’m glad you’re happy,” you tell him. “thank you. for everything. i’m happy you’re happy,” he responds, taking your hand once again. this time, he guides it on his own to rest against his warm cheek. “i love you.”

you feel him smile into your hand and you nod your head solemnly. “i love you.”

#g7hyungnet #jackson wang #jackson wang imagines #jackson wang scenarios #got7 imagines #got7 scenarios #emjae fics

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patatinolovenotes · 7 years

Text

love notes #Part3

5/1/17

P: Amore i watched ten Times each video because I miss you soo much. I would really need you here with me for the next days at least to have my love here since I can’t do anything but studying. You are so beautiful and I wish you were snuggling under the bedsheets with me. I want to wake up early tomorrow morning. Send you my love🐒❤

5/2/17

P: Amore mio.. you are my muse. You inspire me and seeing you so discouraged by your bosses really made me upset. I can’t live with the though you’re not enjoying your everyday life. I hope this will change soon and that with experience you’ll be able to have more of a first hand on your tasks. Ask, be hungry, absorb what you can but remember you work for living and not viceversa. Keep in mind that you are not what you are professionally but you have a spiritual soul which is so pure and kind that any job position would appear so useless compered to your beauty. I know it’s just a hard moment for you right now, and a traditional period to a life style you’re not used to.., and I’m so blind I didn’t understand how many things you are asked to be strong about. I’ll be a better listener I swear my love. Please sleep with free mind and wake up like a flower ready to blossom . I love you from here to there and back together with wrong dates❤🐒 go out and rock my miracle worker. Because with our love you’re doing such a miracle 🐽tu bacio patata

Y: Hahahaha Amore I love the wrong dates part ❤ Honey you are the best, I love you so much. Some time I still can’t believe how magical is it to have you .. thank you for being so amazing and standing by my side .. 💙un bacione, have a lovely day

5/4/17

P: Amore mio, I just read yours.. it can be very true in some aspects and I’m in doubt for some other parts but it might be I didn’t had the chance to get to you well enough yet, and this boosts my curiosity to see everything about you!!! I didn’t read mine yet. I’ll do that tomorrow while on the train for uni. Juventus won 2-0 and I’m quite happy, but I would honestly exchange that result with only one night here, with you. My patata. I miss you so much and always hoping nothing is harming you. I need you. I wanna cook carbonara and matriciana for you❤🐒 un bacio amore, wake up with my love

Ps: I just read mine as well.. I’m astonished how true this things sometimes are

5/5/17

P: I truly love you baby, I was boring and very not romantic in my answer tonight, I just wanted to feel powerful on a very easy going thing and I ruin the mood to both of us. I just want your happiness and you know I would come anywhere anytime to see you, my love. With tonight dreams you’ll wake up fresh and strong again, just wish I was there tonight drinking with you❤🐒 Ps: if by any strange case you bought the flight, don’t throw it away ! I would jump on it! I send you loads of love And enjoy your night You are super sexy

5/6/17

P: Amore mio. Happy birthday. Another winter is gone and you are more beautiful than I could ever imagine. Time goes by, you’re growing and I love you more each minute, hour, day, month! What kind of magic is yours that enchants me more and more each time? You’re entering in the best years of your life. You have the gift to have a rich mind, a deep soul and beautiful body. Don’t ever be sad because the energy you can dissipate will take you wherever you want. I admire your life till now and I hope to be part of it for the upcoming years, cherishing many other adventures, silences and birthdays with you. How much we are invested in the future of each other? The time will give our love a label of beauty, if we will only be lucky enough. Today its your day and I’m sure eating like a pig will make you smile even without me. You’ll be a bit tipsy screaming those little sounds which made me follow in love with you. I really wish I was there to pamper you, to make you feel loved on this planet. I will always be next to you with the aim of being a lift to the other dimension. To the world of dreams where Love rules and we are just little puppets eating passion. But, what I want the most, what I would really like, is to be close to you as soon as possible, so that, with a big kiss from me, you would also receive the wish for happiness that lies in my soul in this very moment. We will find a way to make that happen, together. I send you kisses and 22 minutes of pussy pompino bonus to be asked whenever my princess is in need. Have fun with your friends, go crazy and live the night. Cant wait for the time to come, sharing the same sun, the same soil. I want to discover the world with you. As usual, I woke up today thinking about you, just as I go to sleep with you in my thoughts every time. I love you. Always yours, P. Happy Birth day pataaaa ❤❤❤🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽🐽🐒

5/7/17

P: My love, your birthday is everyday for me because I want to celebrate you daily. We already saw each other growing up from one day to the other and from my side the feeling is that many are yet to come. Im really keen for the upcoming ones but I would like you to savour the present one. Keep one significant image printed in your brain, and rise smiling to the world. I love you. Un bacio🐽🐒

5/9/17

P: You’re such a pataaa and I’m grateful to life, to the world and the starts for putting us together. Sometimes I don’t even know if it’s true because this loves elevates me to a powerful dimension never experienced. I love you amore mio🐽🐽🐒 ti bacio, I miss you

5/10/17

P: My love, I’m sure you had a lovely night with your friend ! How long will she be there? That’s great. I miss you and I want to be there eating hummus on the bed with you. Good night baby sweet dreams ❤🐽🐽🐒 Tesoro have a lovely day

5/11/17

P: Good night my love I will wake up super super early tomorrow to review the final and revise big times! Anyway the only person I would really love to celebrate this with is you and luckily we will be together to catch up very soon 🐽🐒 I’m glad you have a new table, useful, and a friend whom staying over for the weekend ❤before I was just being greedy thinking about the gifts for your colleagues..if it is a “tradition” in the office in the end of the day it will probably build warmness and everyone will gather positive vibes from that ! Hope you have Sweet wet dreams. I love you

5/13/17

P: My pussy patata I’m bouncing to bed for few ours and at 4:20 I have my train from nyon! I always think that I love you because even when passion will slow down and than up and down.. I’ll always love you, for the person you are, whatever happen,I’ll stand with you❤🐽 I’ll text you tomorrow morning! I love you and I don’t know who’d I be without you. Ti bacio amore🐒

P:In train patata! Everything smooth till now I would like to materialise there and watch you sleeping and kissing you slowly without waking you up, kiss kiss for you sniffff wooooof wuf ruuf

Y: Honey I’m going to bed I hope you guys have a fantastic night out, I love you from D to Barcelona, and to the moon and back again. Can’t wait to see you soon! Un bacione my love ❤

5/14/17

Y: Honey bunny I hope you had an amazing night/day Heading to work now!! Un bacione x

5/15/17

P: Dear my love. I can’t explain the amount of joy that I’ll have when I’ll see you. I’m sick about you and I hate we didn’t Skype this two days even when we have had both busy days. But what really make me realise my true love for you is the fact that every moment, even on vacation with my family and busy all day, happy, full.. at my best, I still miss you a lot. Anywhere I go I wish you were there, with me, hand in hand, fighting all the beasts and ghosts of this world. In the dark and in the light I renew my love for you every moment. I love you. I hope today you had fun with your friend at the reastaturant and please let me know how are you! Today after sagrada we went to park guell and stayed at the beach! At night we had amazing dinner in a very conceptual restaurant I hope you’ll drop your point when the time will come and we will make Barcelona one of our cities of love such as the Paris one already on the list.

5/17/17

P: Amore mio! Can you please, I beg you, send me a vocal message tomorrow? I really need to listen to your voice.

P:I love you so much. I’m so upset with words to be so poor after a while to not have more words to describe love. I wonder how poets managed to write so much about love with a relative short dictionary. I really want to have a new vocabulary to talk about love with you and till now we just coined “don’t patata meee” which is not enough and we can do much better. I just want to melt my lips with yours into a never ending kiss.. I feel part of something when with you. Buona notte amore, I could talk for hours about my love for you. I really want to maximise time this time in D and just to spend all the time with you, I don’t need site visiting I just need to visit you my Love. Un bacio grande and have a great day lady❤🐒🐽🐽🐽🐽

Y: Ciao patata Thank you for always being the best boyfriend sending me love letter Even on your vacation day. I’m truly the most lucky girl, found my love and I’m deeply so happy and still in love with you Un bacione, let me know what’s your plan for today Hopefully we can skype tonight amore 🤞🏻

5/18/17

P: I love you, good night my only love, dream.❤🐷🐒

I’m back Already I just wanted to check out the mirador one last time at night, the view on the Alhambra. I was there talking to my self and than I just started referring to you my bocca d'orata, making you alive next to me watching at the view trough my words. It might seem full but I jope you received my call on love in your dreams🐽🐽🐽

5/20/17

P: Amore mio good night, sleep well and I love you ❤

Y: Good night patata I love you Can’t wait to see you soon!

5/21/17

P: Dear my patata I’m counting the minutes and thinking about how I will spend every valuable second with you. I want to have a routine, I want to experience chill life with you and massage you after work cuddling and having nice meals together. I miss you everywhere and soon you’ll be in my arms! I love you❤🐽 Always yours.. We just arrived in T.

5/22/17

P: Home sweet home for a couple of days Amore mio im in my great bed and I feel like a king! I wish you were here next to me as always I send you all my love, I’m exploding thinking there are still 2 days left before my departure ! Tomorrow I will go grocery and stuff and meet the Airbnb guy ect ect! Have a great wake up, I wish I could wake you up tomorrow with a routine pussy pompino❤🐒

Y: Love good night Sorry I was being stupid today I love you so much can’t wait to see you soon, no matter how many days you may have Un bacione my love ❤️

P: No amore Don’t say that Cry for love whenever you want for me, I feel special to be the reason of your tears But I want as well to be the reason of your happiness

Y: Always ❤

5/23/17

P: I love you my patata! Everything is ready for my departure and tomorrow is grocery day❤🐽 can’t wait to be in that Airbnb with you for the time gifted us by gods! Sleep tight and wake up as a princess Hope I’ll dream you tonight🐒

5/24/17

P: Im awake And without alarm

5/29/17

P: Ciao my love! Once again it’s hard to leave you here. This staying has been lovely, even if doing almost nothing, being fed with our love makes me always feel alive more than anything else in my life. I’m always dreaming about that day when we will have our own life together, when we will get the chance to feel sick of one another and ti anyway come back because this love is too great to be trashed. I’ll miss you..! Tonight I’ll send you the no no period in august so you can ask for days off. Planning a new adventure with you is always thrilling.

Y: Hi amore

P: Love you

P:: I’m boarding

Y: Text me when u r at Istanbul and Milan I love you so much

P: Yes patata

Y:Thank you

P: Have a great day at work my miracle worker

Y: ❤ Can’t wait t to see u soon

P: Wish you a good life again in this period while I can’t be there for you. Treat your self and be safe. Take care if the bump goes worse and please keep me up to date.

P: Ciao ciao D 🐒❤

Y: Safe flight baby

5/31/17

P: My patata I love you and I want to be with you now and always I need to drive back now Gugus is drunk with his friend the grandson of S H! G is strange.. you always meet this kind of people but I can’t wait to have you here already. Ti bacio amore, always yours. P ❤🐽🐽🐽🐒

6/1/17

P: My patata.. days, months are gone behind us but I still feel the same passion, the same flying soul and big heart when I look at you. I hope there, in your worm spirit the feeling is just the same. I love you so much and I don’t know what I would do with my life without you. You are my reason of hope, my guiding light and I can’t wait to have you tight in my arms soon again. Sometimes..now for instance I’m falling asleep picturing all the moments of our love: on that pagoda in T, in front of louvre and in Istambul caffè . I want more. I need more. I will do my best to have more time with you in my future days. Often I feel detached, lost, confused but when you are there with me..well everything has a clear shape, a smooth label and vibrant vibes are stimulating my mind. I deeply believe in the love I host in my heart for you. Hoping you’ll be feeling better tomorrow I wish you sweet dreams. Please let me know if you recovered or if there is anything I can do. Distance is hard but it also gives a strong taste to relationships if well managed and I’m proud of us. I’m sleeping in your blankets. I feel good. Ti bacio..i love you🐽🐽❤🐒

6/2/17

P: Pattaaaaaa! I want you here next to me every moment and I have no other words to express this will. My happiest moment of the day is when we are on Skype telling each other about our day, sharing thoughts. I miss you dearly.. I don’t feel my love could ever be bigger than the one I have for you. I learned to love from you. It’s like we were meant to meet and show each other what love was and is. It’s been hard for us, left and right since the day we became “we”. You’ve changed me, with your love you’ve made me strong, you’ve accepted me in your life. Y, I love you a little more every day. Thank you. 6 months. Happy anniversary baby. Ti bacio❤🐽🐒

Y: I love you

6/3/17

P: My love good night 🐽❤I’m home and the night was good to us, we walked a lot and showed the guys the river side and we end up at a strange silent party in baroc park! I love you and hope you’re dreaming softly. Ti bacio amore mio , I need you by my side🐒

P: Amore Patata Love Goodmornig 🐽🐽🐽

Y: pattt

P: We are going to the boat🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾

Y: Be careful baby

❤❤

6/5/17

P: My dear pussy patata! Seeing you so sad makes me sad as well, when you’re happy I’m fine as well. My mood is bounded to your intrinsically, therefore I can only hope and help to always make you feel fair, happy, full. I love the Y crazy for life, passionate about anything and strong as a Siberian tiger. It’s only through the synergy of our love that I can have hope for my life. I love you so much and even now in Geneva, there’s anything that keep set my mind off you. I know it’s hard to ask and that I can’t even imagine how really is.. everything in D for you.. but try to be strong and to be professional till you’ll sit in that office. Be polite, fair, kind, smart..all what you are and sooner or later results will come. I strongly believe in you and in our love as well. Can’t wait to have you in my arms and die in yours because you’re simply home to me. I’ll text when go running tomorrow. Sweet dreams tesoro mio. Ti bacio❤🐽🐒

Y: Ciao patata thank you for being you and making me always in love and happy Good night amore

6/6/17

P: I love you my dear! I’m so glad I have you in my life and I can’t wait to have you in my arms whenever time will be so gentle with us. I always think about you before sleeping because it’s the only thought that makes me relax and wondering about our adventures is the driving force for everyday . Sleep tight my only princess. I send you all the love I have and hope sun will rise in your heart tomorrow morning. I hope I dream of you tonight and our fairy tail. ❤🐽🐒

Goodnight my loveree

6/7/17

P: Patata mia I just so all the concert to commemorate Manchester victims and Liam Gallagher from oasis is always the best

P: Anyway you are my angel and I don’t know where you’ve been al this time I don’t even remember life before you came into mine. Please do never worry about a thing because I would hurt my self before hurting you and I could never betray the promesse of love I did for you. Amore i now feel I want to live my life with you. You’re bringing so much energy into my life but mostly I feel alive because you allow me to bring love in you’re life as well. Thank you for opening me that golden door. Sweet dreams my love. I really wish the best for you and I hope you’ll get what you want and go to Hong-Kong or wherever you’re passion will take you. I’ll be standing next to you fighting for our abd your happiness . Ti bacio.

Y: Ciao pat Thank you for being so supportive love you and I want to be with you and guard our happiness together Ma mi ami ? 🙈

P: Ciao pat yes wa oi ni

Y: ❤ I miss you

6/8/17

P: Patata i would love to have you here with me now. I’m getting into bed missing you so much! Every time I see something beautiful in this world I want to share it with you because you’re a lovely being. As simple as that. Tonight I truly hope to dream about my panther 🐯 alias eggplant! Good night❤🐽

6/9/17

Y: Baby Can u write love letter for me ?

P: Sure my love

P: My dear patata I’ve simply never been that in love in my life with anyone. I fully express my best when with you and I thank you for making me being who I am now. I feel i have the power to conquer peace, happiness and this equilibrium is feeding my soul. I miss you more than ever.. I want you in my arms now I would give anything to swap you and matteo or you and Juanita which is here I hope you feel empowered from my love as well, that you feel to be a better person just for the reason of our lovely relationship. I picture my self with you and our dog one day! I really hope fare will be gentle enough with us to give us this time!!🐽❤🐒

P: Ciao patata. Un bacione

Y: Good night my one and only

6/11/17

P: Ciao my patata!!!!! I’m home and everything was just fine. We had chill dinner down stairs in the common kitchen and than we went on the bench in plan palais square to have a drink and a walk by the lake side! I love you so much and I enjoyed Skype session with you. You were very gentle and sweet today I really felt loved and I happily enjoyed this extra pampers from yours. I hope some days I have the same effect on you and that this passion will last forever. My days would be so happy , full of love and energy. I send you my best kisses from the alps which are waiting to welcome you❤🐽🐒 ti bacio mia principessa

Y: Ciao pat pat And you always have this lovely and sweet effect whenever I talk to you ..❤ Good night amore Let’s see if we can catch each other tomorrow then.

6/12/17

P: Amore I’ve been thinking about the ifs about our relationship.. if we kissed earlier, if we had sex earlier, if we began all of this 12 months ago. If I have to be honest I do not regret one thing. Time gave us the appetite of one another, experience, I mean we fell in love because of time value of our own humanity. We were perfectly cooked just like a medium rare stake or a juicy muffin. What I’m trying to say is that I appreciate every small thing of how things went because I’m afraid any change would impact our current passion and that is the only relevant thing. I love you from the moon (which I’m praying to be in our favour) and back and I would be lost in this chaotic universe. Stay with me and let’s save each other from the boredom of daily life to cherish the moments of wilderness. I send you all my love and I hope tomorrow you’ll have a great day. I need you in my arms. Here. Un bacio grande stellina❤🐽🐒

Y: Honey You are right. We fell in love in the right time and I should be grateful of that. Like you said, we have so much time left together. I can’t wait to explore it with you. Thank you for always keeping up, being the poet and lover that I know and love. I love you from the moon and back My stellino ❤

6/13/17

P: My love since I m loosing a bit my imagination after writing so many love letters, which start being repetitive, I decided to start something experimental today. Daily letters would not be so special any longer, therefore I’ll describe a moment of love we had. Our ancestors said: “verba volant scripta manent” (words disappears, ink writing will survive history). For this reason I want to make unforgettable some of our most lovely portraits. Walking to the restaurant under the rain with you was something magical. I remember the love I felt for you in front of notre dame in the cold Parisian night. You had black leggings a blue jacket and black water proof boots, the ones I like. We were both freezing and I just wanted to go home to warm up under the bed sheets. I felt wanderlust watching to shining Eiffel Tower. Talking of art, dreams and hope for a stimulating life made my staying in Paris something unforgettable so dense and perfect. I love you. I want this to last forever. Un bacio amore mio.❤❤🐽🐒wa oi ni

Y: Ciao baby I’m happy to say I’m sure there are more to come those momsnv Moments* Those moments where we felt madly in love of one and another all the time miss you x

Y: Pat

Do you love me

6/14/17

P: Dear love tonight it’s the turn of the caramelised strawberry at the night market. The lights, the stinky tofu and a huge winner schnitzel Asian style made me full and happy. What I really loved was sharing with you caramelised strawberry sticks which at first are crunchy than sweet and juicy just like your pussy. I would feed my life of those two ingredients and nothing could be ever better. Eating on the door step of a temple a non identify soup, buying gringo prized tropical fruits and waiting your friend to get pierced: well all the little things happening in our world are somehow to me meaningful for the sake of being ours, unique in a way. I love you deeply and I need another pussy strawberry stick very soon. I want to go back to Taipei with my only princess.❤🐒

Y: Ciao pat I miss being with you When you narrative these stories, I can see it in front of my eyes You are a true poet and lover, you should write that on your application 🤗

6/15/17

P: Yo pata I really wanna tell you. You rock. Yes you are lovely because you always have sweet talks for me and your words tastes honey. I remember when we are breakfast on the first morning in Istanbul. The weather was pretty nasty but apart from that breakfast was awesome fried cheese, olives and a young black kitty out of the window. I was happy that day as much as everyday I can have breakfast with you. We have more of those to come❤🐽 buona notte stella🐒

Y: ❤ Amore I was just talking to a friend last night saying the best is to have breakfast with family And tonight you also thought about our breakfast time Have great great day my love You are incredible, I’m so happy I found you Everyday, you reminded me of why we are in love Thank you

6/16/17

P: Amore mio im eating the days and I simply live dreaming about the tomorrow with you. Can’t wait to have you here in my arms, it’s going to be phantasmagoric. I remember the night in the toilet at M palace. Your blue dress was short enough to be easily lifted up for an easy sneak in. Us at the beginning of everything. I can’t even imagine what I was thinking back than because I was literally smashed by love. Pure dust of love. It’s always good to have some rough sex. Above all I think I really fell in love with you in Paris that first evening eating Indian food. I can’t wait to make another adventure with you. Wherever and whatever it takes. I hope you are all god, having fun with tam tam and the guys. Un bacio stella🐒🐽🐽❤

Y: Thank you for always giving me the strength. Being with you, I’m always discovering more about life, us, and love. You fill up the gaps of my ignorance about being in love and loving. I can’t wait to spend next weekend with you It will be another time of our lives, just like all the other times I’ll see you soon, my hero, love, and patata I love you so so much. ❤❤

6/17/17

P: Amore These days I’ve been asking my self lots of times why am I here attending summer semester and what really matters in this life. It took my a while to start understanding that working the entire life to accumulate, to run, to climb the social ladder it’s a narrow minded, dumb approach. First thing must be love, love doesn’t need consumption because it can be always renewed every single day. What will really makes our life meaningful is the amount of love we are going to spread during the time given. I found in you my access to the door of love and without your guiding light I’m sure I wouldn’t be able to express me at my full potential. This being said, I want to say that I don’t care if we are broke, if things are going to be hard, if time and kilometres will take us apart or whatever will fate reserve for us. I’m sure of one thing only. That love is the only thing that matters, and you are my love, so you are in first place for everything. Tonight takes me back to the crazy dance with you at the club. I will always remember the trashy time I had with you in the stars of taipei. I love you my patata ! I can’t count the seconds that are taking us apart but I love you crazily ❤🐽🐒ti bacio

Y: Good night my patata Can’t wait to explore Geneva with you ❤

6/18/17

P: Dear love, I’m in my bed thinking of you, as always, before sleeping. I would have loved to have you here tonight. The art scene in plan palais was something you would have loved and was seeing you everywhere. Tonight I felt in love with the memory in Basel when waiting for Zey’s friend to come pick us up, you wished I had something for the party really keen to get high. You rocked! it was our first official kiss even if I already kissed you a lot in my dreams. I am only thinking of you every time. Un bacione amore mio. Sleep tight because you need energy for the weekend.❤🐒🐽🐽

6/19/17

P: My sweet lady. I miss your skin, your fluffy touch and your cute head. I think how we treat our relationship is extraordinary. It’s a miracle how strong we are and you are my dream, golden mouth from Taipei. I remember the chicken eaten bare hands. One of my favourite dinner with you. Actually it was a bit cold but fried eggs, rice and vegetables fed me perfectly. Any day, night spent with you gives more hope for this life. I want to be tourist forever with you. Soon there’s gonna be another adventure patata and I really can’t wait. Have a great day Stella , I love you.❤🐽🐒 ❤❤🐽 You brought strength amore I love you pat, everyone who does not is missing out something special you flower Can’t wait to have you here and make you feel so.🐒

Y: Honey, I feel lost and feel not in peace for a while. In the past years, I have been motivated to have goals and to always work hard to achieve it. From stuck in T for six years, my goal was to leave, and I did it. From being in school and deciding where to go for my internships, I did it all. And from graduating with honours with finance specialization, I did it. And once I’ve done it all, I feel lost. In the alchemist, one of the crystal merchant never went to Mecca because he was too afraid that if he did go, his life will be without a meaning. And now I feel like I’m in the stage where I am a plastic bottle in the ocean, going with the flow but at the same time struggling to tell myself I have some sort of “purpose”, goal, or dream. The truth is I have been lost for the past almost a year. I don’t know who I want to be anymore, I don’t know where I want to be, and I don’t know if I should stand up tall and just keep thriving without a direction or to do something else. I feel trap in this maze that I set myself in. I hope soon I can feel happiness and determination like the times when I walk down the stairs in the humid and stinky NYC subway, or stroll down the vertical avenues of the NYC street, passing through financial buildings, historical buildings, and parks. I want to feel the sense of coolness when biking down the road in bulle, where I see the nature at its best and worst in that far faraway town. I want to go out and meet new people and different people. I miss socializing with humans. I miss dancing and getting drunk with people have just met one hour ago. I miss feeling that I have a goal and purpose. I feel trapped, honey. And I feel my heart and brain is not glowing anymore, because I’m too afraid or don’t know where to go and what to do with my life. I feel dull. I used to look at the flower blooming and feel like the happiest person. I used to spend time going to supermarkets and struggle to find the cheapest discounts and feel rewarded. I used to go online and look for healthy recipe and make it for me and my sister. I used to be so fearless, and now I lost that sense of courage and feel dull….

6/20/17

P: Sometimes we find our selfs in times of trouble and nothing seams to be clear. This feeling of disruption, of detachment you had tonight is just the beginning of understanding who you really are. Life till now was easy; goals were clear, the path was well indicated and success was the only possible answer. Nevertheless after playing by the rules, after such a hectic life for the past few years, getting back to a sedentary life in the desert where freedom is not granted and humanity is hard to find like water..well I understand your struggle. I think nobody would be able to stand still, to not feel like you feel every here and than. You want to be stoic? You are already my love. You’ve been so strong, with self control and wise attitudes. Nobody said it was easy to go to D at 22 with the hope of a youngster and feel integrated in few months. Be resolute my love. Now that you have clear in your mind that even with top management positions, with all the possibilities in this world..when you have no one you love to cherish the fortune with, everything is gone. I would advice you to set new goals in your life, new steps to be achieved. Find something you want to improve of your self, take care of small soul facets you’d like to empower. Be close to spirituality and transcendence, feel the magic of love and have faith for a wonderful life. When you practice love and wisdom the rest will follow, I’m sure the light will guide you pat. I cannot teach you anything unfortunately because I know nothing. Wisdom or love are only practicable, liveable. When you are seeking and you’re able to find nothing, nothing because what you see is only what seeks, being obsessed with the goal I mean. What really finding is..is being free, being open, having no goal. Your soul is the whole world, the world that you create. Finally I want to tell you I love you so much because you’re full of questions, with very little answers. This is a sign not only of mere couriosity but mostly a sign of intelligence. I hope that within us there is a sort of sanctuary where we can both retreat and be our selfs with each other. Trough your struggle I’m learning my self new aspects of my soul and I’ll be always grateful to golden mouth. Don’t be so angry at your fate, because you’ll find new solutions. Great humans rise when in shitty situations. You are not alone on this planet patata, you are not the only one struggling in the chaotic cosmos. I’m here to hold your hand, not being ambitious to guide you, but just to tackle the flow together if you wish. I send you all my love and wish for a better day tomorrow. -4 and you are in my arms and I’ll be in yours. Ti bacio tanto amore, sei una stella❤🐽🐒

Y: Ciao patatoz Thank you for being here I’m looking forward for the day when I am stronger. And looking forward for the day when I’m going to see you This Friday my love I can’t wait

6/21/17

P: Dear my waxed patata🐽🐽🐽🐽everything is ready to host you here. Please don’t cut your hairs tooo much. I have no words tonight to explain my will to have you here right now next to me sharing the same sky. I want to remember our dinner in front of Sophia mosque, with the muezzin calling the prayers. The food was delicious and I loved you so much that night. Maybe for the reason that you were dizzy just after a glass or because you always choose the nicest places for us. I love you and I need to have you in my arms amore. I’m super happy seeing you pimpin to come. Ti bacio🐒❤

6/22/17

P: I don’t even know if you’ll manage properly to read this message since screen is fucked! Patata -2 I don’t know if this is real. The magic you bring in my life is powerful. Today since you mentioned in our last call I want to jot down the memories of me walking on the floor in Taipei. It was amazing smoking up with you and just crawling in each other eyes. I loved how that night we went out for dinner whatsoever, I loved the way you just stayed there with me in the dumbest moment. I had a lot of fun with the best Jerome ever drinking beers, playing FIFA and talking about the news of the workd, (he was being very generous and I cooked pizza for us). Sabrina and matteo are at home and now I’ll try to go to bed knowing I’ll have to sleep deeply. I wish you were here my love to share bed with me. Tomorrow is the day, you didn’t fly out of the country recently and now you are coming to Geneva to meet me, you deserved that. Ti bacio, I can’t be more impatient, I wait for you here Stella.

6/23/17

P: Hey patata tonight I am excited about our love in a way I never experienced before. I am always up to speak with you and see what you’ve become shaped by life. I want you so much my patata that I can’t explain! I will send you all the infos and Sabrina will be there to open the door and get you settled. I love you, hope you’re confi there because here, here we will have to rock❤🐒ti bacio amore mio

Y: Amore I’m in Frankfurt Good to be back in Europe

P: Welcome home

P: Ciao pat! I’m in a super rush and late! S will be there to welcome you in, money on my desk inside the book, I forgot to leave the keys but you can arrange with Sabrina since she has M’s. I should be done early I think since there is in class assignment. Be safe for the last bit and weekend is about to lit !!🐽🐽

6/26/17

Y: Dear pat.. ❤thank you for this weekend one again. I’m so grateful to have met you in my life, over the past 6 months, I have only loved you more not less. And like you said, when we are together we both feel more assured about who we are and want to be together. You are my love. I honestly have never met someone I love so much. Being with you I only have love, happiness, and sex. I honestly can’t wait for what’s more to come. I want to travel, live and have puppies with you. I can see myself spend time with you and being better for you and for us. Amore, for every moment looking into your eyes, I love you more. I’ll see you super soon ❤

6/27/17

P: Amore mio I can’t believe just few hours ago I was holding you tight and playing with you. I feel so happy when I’m with you whatever happens around. My soul is at his best when you are there and my body feels fearless. I can perceive the energy. I become stupid and I can’t stop to repeat pat pat and whaaaazzz uuuuuup! Anyway the thing is I’m in love with you. Hope you felt the life going fast, open heart and indulgent with me. I will always take care of you. We will meet soon mia dolce bocca d'orata. Ti bacio 🐒❤

Amore i love you so much that you can’t barely imagine. I never loved in my life that intensively and I can’t think of me loving someone more. Please trust me on that

6/28/17

P: Amore I don’t know how you do but you always manage to make me feel loved even when you are far away. These last days were amazing for me. I will never forget,whatever happens, the picnic with paella and sausages laying on grass. The stroking around the city, floating with the river’s current and the easy food. I’m in love with you, meaning that you’re my sexy exotic pussy and best friend, a home where to restore with joy. You buying a cake also makes me happy because you’re always gentle and generous. I hope tomorrow will be a fine day at work and I’ll Skype with my princess for sure,

If available. Ti bacio tanto amore mio. Mi manchi❤🐽love

6/29/17

P: My love we spent more than 2 and a half hour on Skype and calling today without counting the amount of messages and related stuff . I think this is love. I think about you all the time and I wish you were next to me all the time. I love you. The time we had sex till 1pm in milan with elisa in the apartment and than I run to giannasi to grab some food for us. I would be happy if I could continue to feed you for the rest of our remaining time. Please let’s make an effort and resist till we enter in our own place. I’ll be very happy that day especially if you’ll give me that pompino you promised. Buona notte tesoro, don’t be late tomorrow. Ti bacio tanto❤🐽🐒

6/30/17

P: Dear pat, distance is hard to understand many times and things seems to fade away, but in the deep of my heart I know you’re hear. Just next to me. I want, I need to create with you a value of life that would satisfy my soul. I want to be shaped by our necessities. I’m thrilled by the idea of being like water ready to leak into every grief. I’ll be always there for you, loyal to our love, asking for nothing, offering all I’ve got. These days may seem strange, hectic, full of confusion and different dreams. I truly hope our paths won’t take opposite direction. I see my self five years from now next to a great yet normal woman, simply sharing the time gifted to us. It’s widely spread the idea of how a relationship ought or shouldn’t be, how work life should or shouldn’t be. I don’t want to be part of any label. I want to shape our own time in a very personal way, asking many question without necessarily having all the answers. I want to print in my mind the lucky day when you were laying in this bed naked, satisfied by sex. I wish you were here with me right now to be animalistic in bed, flying high with our minds on the madness of the world out there. I thank every atom, particelle of experience that lead my path bumping into yours in a cold snowy night in Bulle. Since than slowly but surely our destinies were bound to partner. I love you my patata. I wish you a nice sleep. The stars of the desert are looking at you, because you’re beautiful and precious. Ti bacio sempre. ❤🐽🐒

7/1/17

P: Amore mio im in bed room with parents and they are sleeping already can’t really call You are my one and only princess on this planet. I need you so badly. I’m in a very small bed right now and wouldn’t share an inch with anyone.. but I’m sure with you this would be just fine. What I mean is that there always room for you to stay with me if you only wish. I can’t wait for the day when we will have a tesla and a couple of dogs..driving our down the road mood. I want to live my life with you and it’s hard to accept is still not happening. I miss you deeply tonight I want to touch your hairs and have you. I want to remember the first evening in Taipei where I rolled and your friends were astonished, I was talking to a South African friend on the phone regarding the shitty sumas situation, we were high and the air was hot. The only moments when I’m calm, happy are the one with you. I love you pat, buona notte.❤🐽🐒tuo P

Y: 💙💙💙 I know I’m always jealous and annoying But with you I can’t stop thinking about everything. All the happy and sad runs through my mind when thinking about you. You are the sunshine and strawberries, and my source of happiness and food.

Y:I was watching a series yesterday, don’t really remember what was it about, but one part the girl was saying how her ex boyfriend depend on her so much, he lost who he is, and how can she be with him when there’s no more him…. I fell asleep with those sentences in my mind, because i realize my happieness everyday depends on you too now. Of course it relates to other things, but I couldn’t imagine going through the first couple of the year in D without you. Not just in D but the fact that I can’t think and imagine another time right now without you. You are my source of happiness and dopamine. I seek for the messages you sent when I wake up, I look forward for the nights when we Skype, and I travel through time and cities having you with me. And this makes me afraid too. Because now again, I realized never love someone so much as I love you and there’s no one else I would want to share my happiness sadness anger and love with. I know I’m not the easiest girlfriend to be with, and thank you for giving me so much patience, kindness, and love. Be with me for a bit longer and I’ll give you all I can give…would you ? 💙 I love you my love ❤️ I’m always only thinking about you

7/2/17

P: Amore mio. You deliver love letters less than me. This is a matter of fact. But when you do, well it’s exceeding any expectations. I love you so much and every time is a special gift for me. I believe more than you that is possible, that for us there is a shared fate. You are not hard at all. In this world where we look only for perfection and fiction stories, I seek for mistakes, for the love of misunderstandings. I believe I love you not for your perfect body, for your smooth skin and sexy ass. I love you for te annoying part, for every small mistake you do that freaks me out. I’ll never stop loving you and I can’t wait for august to bring you to my home land. We will eat like kings and I’ll show you everything worth our precious time. Thanks for being you and sharing your time with me, my only princess. I depend on you and my happiness is bounded to yours, so please do not be afraid because there is no fear we can’t defeat together. Ti bacio tesoro mio. 🐽❤🐒always yours Have an amazing day tomorrow and please let me know username and password Let’s dream my love

7/3/17

P: Amore I just want to hug you so much And hold you tight t must have been something I can’t imagine But I’m sure you’ll manage to find your pictures I would like to be with you and go trough them together You know I’m here if you ever want to talk or call right?

P: ❤❤ my love I’m not prepared enough to understand how traumatising was that moment of your life for you. I can’t imagine you going trough such a horrible period and becoming the woman you are now. You’ve been amazing and I’m astonished, amused of you as always. You exceed any expectation, as always. I just want to be there and hug you tight in my arms I can’t stand the idea of you being there in the bed thinking of those things without my support. It makes me sick as well. In quinte sure now if I say I believe our moods are dramatically bounded and so I feel a bit sad as well. I’m very sorry for what happened and how you feel tonight. I hope one day we will be able to share this when we are together. I send you all of my support, please call me any moment of you have nightmares or anything, I’ll live the ringtone max level

Anyway tonight I want to remember the dinner in Oman, at the nice random restaurant before taking off for D, I loved that dinner as almost all the ones with you. I really liked the rice and all the dishes. We also changed table to go to the window one, I can remover we had a nice conversation. I enjoyed su much your company that night and I hope there are thousands to come. I need to live with you pat, I can’t wait any longer.

Juste remember call me if you need anything or if you wanna talk or just stay in silence. Un bacio grande stellina mia 🐽🐒

: I’m always yours and ready to give you my love❤🔥buona notte

7/4/17

P: amore mio in these days you’re making me feeling so loved and wanted that I can’t remember a better moment of my life for love and passion. I always think of you in a sweet way, moving than to a strong sexual desire and this is simply crazy because I’ve been always separating my sexual desire with the passion I hold for your mind, philosophy of life. I m hanging all my hopes for the time when I’ll be hugging you again, showing you the beauty of my homeland. I really need you badly here and in the future. I want to jot down tonight our joints in taipei especially the ones smoked on sun and moon lake just out of our small hotel. Do you remember the butler/receptionist asking for how I felt about the coffee? I admit I like every moment when you are there. Hope tonight is a smooth sleep in for my princess. Ti bacio tutta. love

7/5/17

P: I am loving with no expectation nor demands but only with the curiosity for what will happen, being sure the best is yet to come for us. I barely imagine a situation in which patata number one is without pataaa2. I know sometimes we become childish but it’s hilarious. I really like it. When you tease me I’m still loving you. These days Goldenmouth is making me so happy. I love you. I want to remember the first time I met your mum . I couldn’t say properly the things you thought me. I really loved my time in town with you. Everything form food to sleeping wee had was great and sometimes I dream about the market and being there eating anything. Tu bacio tanto amore mio❤🐒have a great day tomorrow

7/6/17

Y: Buona notte amore I love you 💓💓

P: Amore tesoro mio!❤ you are a crazy little lovely thing and I can’t can’t loving you. I’m so happy we obtained another adventure together and it’s gonna be great time because whatever happens or we do when we share same stars above us everything is magic, full of passion. I kind of like the memory of us walking into park de bastion in the morning and listening to the small van beats while sitting on the yellow iron chairs. It was a charming moment for me full of recalls. I want to drink coffe with you every morning and last ray of sunshine. Ti bacio tanto my love and I wish you sweet dreams. 🐽🐒 Can’t stop In the beginning *

7/7/17

P: My tesoro caro where you that tired?

I love you. I love your nose Y, your mouth and crazy voice. I love the way you walk and and how you smoothly surf life. I’m always thinking about how happy I’ll be when we’ll be together in august. I need to play with you and keeping you right tonne. I don’t want to ever let you go forever. I love you my sweet patata. Un bacio 🐽❤🐒always

Tight in my arms*

7/8/17

Y:My love, words can’t explain how much you mean to me. Your knowledge and love for life enlightens me to be the best version of myself with you and alone. Thank you for taking the time and patience teaching me the things that I forgotten or never know about. I promise you, each day, I’ll become more positive with our love. Not that I am not positive now, it’s just that there’s a burden of love for me when opening my heart to someone or going to someone’s heart. I love you so much but it’s still hard for me to see the way you see love. I do believe what you believe deep down, but I always forgot about it with my three second gold fish memories. I would like to have faith in us together. Please give me some time, as I never thought about I can be competed naked outside and in. Thank you for showing me another world. I love you my patata or should I say I am passionate about you.

P: Ciao My passion I miss you so much here

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helloatomicbouquetpoetrywor-blog · 7 years

Text

Compilation of Stories

“Friendship is forever”

By: Junley Nazario Dula

Exposition: Axcel- he is main character of the story, he is very handsome, kind, approachable, trustworthy and humble. He has a best friend named Darlene, they are very close to each other since they were a child.

Darlene: a strong, beautiful, kind but boyish, she is the buddy of Axcel.

Arianne: sexy, hot, kind girl she is the ideal girl of Axcel.

Sebastian: (father of Axcel) he want Axcel to by marry by Arianne.

Daryl: best friend also of Darlene, lesbian but kind.

Settings: boutique, secret place, house

Conflict: Darlene confess to Axcel that she love him since they were a child, but Axcel is already engaged with Arianne.

Climax: Darlene fight for her feelings to Axcel in her life forever.

Resolution: she do everything just to make him happy, even if Axcel and Arianne are planning to marry. She showed to axcel that she is better than Arianne.

End: one time Darlene and Axcel are celebrating party, they drunk in that night they are hang over don’t know what happen, a month after Darlene was vomiting because she’s pregnant , she tell it to Axcel sad to say tomorrow is their wedding. Axcel is very confused who will he choose? Darlene that is pregnant? Or the one he loved? He didn’t feel it to Arianne the ceremony is unstoppable, he need to decide. Accidentally in that evening Arianne was happy and she told Axcel that she is pregnant. They don’t know what to do! He is planning to kill his self, but Darlene saw him, Darlene told Axcel that he must choose Arianne because you love her.

“Friendship is forever”

Long time ago there are best friend namely Axel and Darlene, they are close to each other in sadness and in happiness until they grow up and find their love one’s.

(Arianne passed in front of the house of Axcel)

Axcel: Wow! Shes so beautiful and gentle I think she’s the one

Darlene: Yeah dude, why don’t you get her number? So that you can know her better.

Axcel: Good idea dude perfect!

(Axcel ask the girl)

Axcel: hi! Your so pretty and may I know your name?

Arianne: Sure! I’m Arianne nice to meet you

Axcel: Can I have your number?

Arianne: Sure, here! (gave her number) just text or make a call with me.

Axcel: Thank you.

Narrator:

Axcel and Arianne are getting to know each other their having a date once a week, or if they have free time. One day Darlene caught axcel and Arianne going home, at that time Darlene want to confess her feelings to axcel.

Darlene: Where did you came from?

Axcel: Were having a date

Darlene: Axcel can I talk to you for a while?

Arianne: by the way axcel I want to go home now! Thankyou and I love you

Axcel: Good bye babe see you again love yeah.

Axcel: Yeah sure what is it best friend?

Darlene: I just wanted to tell you that I love you!

Axcel: I think you’re not feeling well today. Just go home and take a rest

Darlene: But axcel?

Axcel: No! Just leave!!!

Darlene: Okay..

A days after Axcel is shock because his boyish friend start to put make-up in her face and very conscious what she wear.

Darlene: Hi dude, do I look so beautiful this day?

Axcel: Yes, unbelievable dude

Darlene: Thank you.

Narrator : Darlene look beautiful everyday, she go to axcel house to cook meals, and take good care of him to show her feelings to him.

Scene 2

Narrator

Until the day come! Axcel told Darlene that axcel and Arianne are engage already, Darlene was shocked and accept the truth and because they are bestfriend Darlene put limitation to her self.

Febuary 14 its Darlene’s birthday so the bestfriend Axcel and Darlene was celebrating.

Axcel: Good morning Darlene wake up! Wake up its your birthday lets celebrate and enjoy.

Darlene: Stop dude im still sleepy..

Axcel: Wake up. Wake up dude..

Darlene: Grrrr… okay okay okay.

(Celebrating party)

Axcel: Woah cheers..

Axcel: Darlene, and daryl cheers.

Daryl: Shit.. My mother told me to go home now because my father had admitted to hospital

Axcel: Okay dude keep safe

Darlene: Lets go to sleep, Axcel im dizzy

Axcel: Okay want dude…

Scene 3

Narrator: They are not in their selves at that night because they are hang over accidentally there is something wrong at that time.

July 8 is the wedding day of Axcel and Arianne but before that July 2 9 pm in the evening Darlene talk to axcel.

Darlene: Axcel can I talk to you?

Axcel: Yes? What is it?

Axcel: Do you have a crush awee.

Darlene: No! I’m serious dude

Axcel: Okay what is it?

Darlene: I just want to informed you that im pregnant

Axcel: What this is bullshit!

Darlene: Okay bye I want to go home.

Arianne: I’m sure axcel will be happy for this I’m pregnant

Arianne: Babe what happen?

Axcel: Nothing

Arianne: I have good news

Axcel: What is it babe?

Arianne: I’m pregnant

Axcel: What?

Arianne: Are you sad?

Axcel: Hamm of course I’m happy babe

Scene 4

Narrator: Axcel is very confused and don’t know what to do, so he is planning to commit suicide. But Darlene saw him.

Darlene: Stop that dude please? I’m not saying that you should stand for our baby.

Axcel: I don’t know what to do dude I want to die.

Darlene: Please stop! Come here let’s talk about it.

Axcel: This is all my fault.

Darlene: No, it is all my fault. I’m carried away from my emotion don’t be sad tonight tomorrow is your weeding hope to see you in the ceremony, Congratulations best friend!

Scene 5

Narrator: Darlene set him free because Axcel’s true love is Arianne, she accept the fact that they are not mean to be forever.

“Homeless but not hopeless”

By: Group 4

Narrator: There was a very poor family who’s living in the nasty street. They have a son named Brylle. He is 17 years old, tall, thin, with black hair and brown-colored eyes. He collect scrap or plastic bottles every day to help her mother find money for their food because his father is already dead. He also has side-line works for additional income because he want to study and to become a teacher someday, he want to teach children like him living in a nasty street. Because of their status in life, Brylle is mature enough in facing life’s challenges.

(There are students passing in the street)

(While helping his mother wash their clothes)

Brylle: look at them mother, soon I will be like them a student wearing his uniform and goes to school every day to study.

Sesil: that’s good Brylle, I hope to see you walking in the stage with a lot of medals or awards but sorry for everything we are not able to send you to school even if that is our responsibilities as parents.

Brylle: it’s okay mother, don’t worry I will find a way so that I can finish my studies and I’ll make sure that you will get tired of putting all the medals (laughs).

Sesil: hmmm I’ll be expecting that son.

Narrator: One day his mother broke down because of Leukaemia. Brylle tried everything just to save her mother. He asked for help from other people, begged in the streets and any other ways where he could find money for his mother’s medication.

(Begging in the street)

Brylle: ma’am please help me, my mother is sick she needs medicine please help me

Rude girl 1: (shouting) stop! I don’t have money get out of my way!

Rude girl 2: you’re big enough! Why don’t you find a work to earn money?

Narrator: Unfortunately nobody helped and gave him money. Brylle was so desperate to do everything just to save her mother and that he thought of stealing.

(Bryle is waiting for a perfect time to get the loaves of bread)

Sebastian: I got you poor boy!

Brylle: I’m sorry sir I didn’t mean it, I’m just trying to help my mother so please let me go.

Sebastian: the people like you must be put in jail, you thief!

Brylle: but sir, my father is dead and my mother is sick and lying in bed, living in this world without her is useless so please give me chance, let me go.

Sebastian: okay I will accept your apology for now! But next time if you will do it again you will face the consequence.

Sebastian: thank you so much sir, God bless you.

Narrator: Brylle went home and what he saw made him shocked. His mother is lying in the floor and was already dead.

Brylle: mother wake up, please don’t leave me I can’t leave without you mother, so please?

Narrator: What happened may be tough for Brylle but he had no choice but to accept the fact that his mother was gone. It took him time to overcome what happened. And because of his mother’s death he has no more home to be lived in. He only sleeps on the roadside and find food on trashes until one day someone approached him.

Merly: hey boy! Wake up

Brylle: hmmm what do you want from me? Who are you?

Merly: umm I’m Merly I just want to help you, and get out of you here in a dirty place do you have a father? Mother? Or Relatives here?

Brylle: no, I don’t have any, I’m all alone.

Merly: why? Where are they?

Brylle: my mother and father have passed away

Merly: hmmm I’m sorry for that

Brylle: it’s okay

Merly: by the way what is your name?

Brylle: I’m Brylle and you are?

Merly: I’m Merly, okay what are you waiting for? Come on come with me

Narrator: Merly helped Brylle and let him live in her house and treated him as her own son.

Merly: come on get inside don’t be shy

Brylle: how can I call you?

Merly: you can call me Merl, Merly, Aunty if you want to

Brylle: hmm can I call you mother?

Merly: yeah! Sure

Brylle: can I ask a favour? Mother?

Merly: yes? What is it?

Brylle: can you help me? I want to study because that is my promise to my mother and I don’t want to fail her, can you do it for me mother? Promise I will do my best the best that I can.

Merly: no problem, okay lets sleep early because tomorrow we will go to school to enrol you.

Brylle: sure? Thank you so much mother.

(In the morning)

Merly: Brylle wake up! We will go to school now

Bryelle: okay mother

Merly: let’s go?

Brylle: let’s go!

Narrator: Merly enrolled brylle in New Ormoc City National High School for his Junior high school, hopefully we will see him years after, walking on the stage receiving his diploma.

“field trip”

By: Archie lawagon Contapay

Setting: Home

Time: Present

Theme: Industriousness

Characters:

Amy- a high school student

Ronald- Amy’s father

Paula- Amy’s mother

Dina- Amy’s friend

Conflict: Amy knew very well that her father would allow her to join the schools fieldtrip. However, she also needed the permission of her mother but she was afraid she won’t let her go.

End: She knew she would find pleasure in everything she would do inside the house.

“Fieldtrip”

The students of St. Francis academy have a field trip to Laguna. And Amy would need five hundred pesos so she could join the trip. Her mom is a high school principal and her dad is an engineer in a multinational construction firm. But she had to get her mom’s nod if she really wants to be with the group now, she has a problem with her mom. Her mom has been nagging her to clean her room, study hard, and sweep the backyard. She wanted her to limit her watching television, playing with her cell phone and going out with friends, which, according to her mom, has a bad record on her report card. Her classmate Dina told her while they were eating snack at the school canteen. “I think that the best thing you can do to please her so she would allow you to go”

After breakfast on Saturday morning. Amy went her room carrying a broom and a dustpan. She wanted her mom and dad to see that she was changed. She promised herself that she would skip TV in the morning and in the afternoon and not touch her cell phone unless it was necessary.

They walked towards the house. After what she did that morning and after seeing her mom’s beautiful smile, she was sure she would allow her to go. More than that, she knew she would tried pleasure in everything she would do inside the house.

Narrator: the students of St. Francis academy have a field trip to Laguna. And Amy would need five hundred pesos so she could join the trip. Her mom is a high school principal and her dad is an engineer in a multinational construction firm.

Amy: mom! Can you gave five hundred pesos

Paula: for what?

Amy: because were having a field trip and I need five hundred pesos so that I could join.

Paula: no! I want you to clean your room and sweep the backyard. (Bad mood)

Amy: but mom!

Pula: and from now on you should to limit on watching television, playing with your cell phone, and going out with your friends.

Narrator: because her mom didn’t like that there is a bad effect on Amy’s report card.

(At the canteen)

Dina: “I think that the best thing you can do to please her so she would allow you to go”

(While eating the snack)

Amy: thank you for your advice Dina!

Narrator: after breakfast on Saturday morning. Amy went her room carrying and a dust pan. She wanted her mom and dad to see that she has changed. She promised herself that she would skip TV in the morning and in the afternoon and not touch her cell phone unless it was necessary.

Amy: mom! I’m done cleaning the house.

Paula: that’s good Amy!

Ronald: Hon! You should allow her to join the field trip.

Paula: okay! I’m allowing you. But! You should care for yourself. Here’s the five hundred pesos.

Amy: yeah! Yes mom thank you so much !

“Friendship”

By: Biacolo, Fatima T.

CHARACTERS:

Eya Rodriguez- A nerdy girl that is clumsy yet a responsible student

Cross Standford- A handsome guy, famous and feels like doesn’t care about everything.

SETTING: Road

PLOT:

EXPOSITION: Rushing along the road with a little bit of clumsiness, here comes Eya Rodriguez, hurrying like no other for the fear that she might get late from her first period class; carries books, left and right hand. A back bounding over and over again with her matching nerdy eyeglasses that suits her personality.

CONFLICT: While running like no other without even noticing of the different vehicles that she was passing. A black sports car suddenly bumps her that would actually hit her harder and be thrown far away. Fortunately, it stopped on the little space that even her belongings will not be moved. But actually was thrown away from different directions due to her unmeasurable

ratelessness and panic.

CLIMAX: As expected, Eya was really mad like there is no room for any calmness. She was already talking all the bad words that she could. When suddenly a man slowly gets out from the car when the same feeling that Eya was engaging lately. He was also mad saying that how clumsy Eya is and if she wants to die early, she should not include another person. Eya didn’t already the face of the guy yet, she answered it also with anger.

RESOLUTION: They had an intensive argument but then it suddenly stops their eyes meet. They had a more than a minute eye to eye contact on each other and this cause Eya to prevail her calmness when she also cross Standford. Even though, they didn’t officially settle the situation, they both walked away with sweet smiles.

ENDING: Cross Standford get in the car like nobody cares and continue driving to park his car while Eya Rodriguez continued to get her books that were scattered all over. While reminiscing the handsome face of cross hoping that their paths might cross again.

NARRATOR: One day a guy calls her to serve him a food

CROSS: Hey miss come her.

EYA: Yes, sir what do you want sir?

CROSS: One box cup cake

EYA: Copy right sir! But the both eyes of Eya see a guy beside, he is a cute and charming face of this guy.

(In the school)

GIRLS: Ugly duckling face

GIRLS: ewww!!!

GIRLS: When Eya was push in a 3 girls

CHAD: Hey girls stop bullying, go leave her alone.

EYA: Was cry when the 3 girls do that to her

CHAD: Are you okay?

EYA: Thanks for saving me

CHAD: by the way I’m Chad

EYA: I’m Eya

CHAD: Nice to meet you

EYA: Nice to meet you to

By the way, excuse me Chad can I go to my class, thanks for saving me again.

CHAD: Can I go with you, if its okay to you

EYA: Okay..

CHAD: Ahm Eya?!

EYA: Yes Chad?!

CHAD: If they do that again to you just tell me okay?

EYA: Thanks for your concern Chad, but I can manage myself.

CHAD: Okay

NARRATOR: Back to Eya since she is a poor gil she looks a job to sustain her personal maid of cross

(In the house of cross)

EYA: Sir wake-up…. Sir… wake-up

CROSS: Shit… What the hell are you doing?

EYA: Sir Cross….

NARRATOR: Cross was shocked

CROSS: What are you doing to my room? Why don’t you knock the door?

EYA: Sorry Sir, your mother asked me to wake you up, because you might be late in going school.

CROSS: Okay! Can you go out to my room?

NARRATOR: Chad did not expect that Eya is her personal maid.

CROSS: Eya can we talk?

EYA: Yes Sir!

CROSS: I have something to tell you,

I just don’t understand my heart, I have lot of girls but the time I saw you my heart beats so fast.

NARRATOR: Chad confessed his feeling for Eya.

EYA: Sir..? Do you really like me? You know that we are not compatible for each other, your standard is quite high compared to me.

CROSS: But I like you so much. Eya, look… I really don’t care about my standard, what is important is that I love you.

EYA: Cross….! I love you also.

CROSS: Does it mean that we are officially in relationship?

EYA: Ahm….. Yea…..yes, from this time on I am your girlfriend.

CROSS: Yes..! Yes..! Oh… I love you Eya!

EYA: I love you too Cross.

NARRATOR: Eya and Cross are officially in relationship.

“VAMPIRE ECLIPSE”

By: Emalou Larioza

(In the house)

Mother: Jong come here

Jong: Yes mom.

Mother: Son, meet sandarac hmm daughter of our business partner sandarac this is my son Jong.

Sandarac: Hi, I’m sandarac

Jong: Nice to meet you sandarac.

Sandarac: Just call me for short Dara okay

Jong: Okay

Mother: Son can you please be a nice her because she’s stay her in our house for a few months.

Jong: Mom. No

Mother: But why son? She’s pretty and kind honestly she’s beautiful.

Jong: But mom I don’t like her to stay our house so please mom.

Mother: No son his final decision okay be nice to her.

“The Rivals”

By: Juntilla maricris

Narrator: In a school named San Andres University, there were different kind of students, different views, different standings in life. But despite the differences, students still co exist and happy hanging out at each other. Some find things in common and some find love. Like Manulo and Maria. And it all start in the first day of their college life.

Manulo: I am so exited for my first day in college! I will do my best and be myself.

Narrator: Manulo went to his class. And while waiting for their instructor, he and his classmates are now making friends.

Manulo: Hi! My name is Manulo. What's yours?

Jasper: I don't talk to stranger and to a beggar like you.

Manulo: Ok? But in case you need someone to talk to I will be here.

Narrator: While still waiting for their Instructor, a beautiful girl named Maria suddenly walk in the class with her best friend Laura. Manulo and Jasper's eyes couldn't look away at Maria for they were astonished of Maria's beauty. Maria and Laura sat in front of Manulo and Jasper.

Laura: Hi, my name is Laura. What's yours?

Jasper: I'm Jasper, my family is an influential family in this City. We live in a Mansion, and I only hangout to rich students like you two. By the way, what is your name?

Maria: I'm Maria.

Manulo: Hi guys, I think we will became good friends, and will have a good time together. By the way I'm Manulo. I may not be rich but I live with dignity and honesty.

Maria: Oh, hi Manulo. Nice to meet you.

Manulo: It's nice to meet you too Maria.

Princess: Hi guys, I sit at the back of the class and i notice you guys. Can we be friends? Hi Manulo and Jasper, I did know your names because I have heard your conversation.

Narrator: There Instructor suddenly came in the class. Princess is insecure of Maria because of her beauty and because of many admire her and that includes Jasper and Manulo. In the following days, they became friend which the whole school admires because of their looks. 2weeks past by and they know each other much well. Manulo and Jasper fell for Maria because of Maria's looks and personality, and Maria started liking Manulo because of his good and kind kindhearted heart. Laura likes Jasper despite of jaspers personality.

Laura: Can I talk to you for a second Jasper?

Jasper: Ok, no problem.

Laura: Jasper, it is hard for me to say this but I finally have the guts to say this right now. I like you!

Jasper: I'm sorry Laura, I can only give you friendship. Because the one that I like is Maria and no one else.

Manulo: Maria, I have a confession to make for you. At the first day that i meet you, even from now my heart is pounding whenever I see you. Every time you are near, I am always happy. You always makes me smile. I think I love you!

Narrator: Jasper heard of Manulo's confession to Maria and immediately interrupts the conversation.

Jasper: I to love you Maria. Would you choose someone like him over me?! Someone that do not have anything, rather than I can give you anything. I have many things that I have that Manulo don't have. I have money and influence. How about you Manulo?

Manulo: Maria, right now I have nothing to give like what Jasper can give you. But the only thing that I can give you right now is my true love that never die. I promise that I will love you with all my heart, and I will do, my best in school so I can give you anything you want in the near future.

Maria: I don't need anything Manulo, the only thing that I need is your love. I too like you, because you are not just handsome but you also have a nice heart. And even our instructor can see your potential to be a succesful man someday because of your hard work.

Narrator: Jasper's anger suddenly blow, because of jealousy. And started a fight with Manulo by punching Manulo. Manulo did not punch Jasper and just blocking and pushing Jasper away to avoid the fight.

Jasper: Maria likes me and she will never be yours Manulo! And I will do everything to make Maria mine.

Manulo: Cant you see it Jasper? Maria loves me and I love Maria more than anything. Stop being selfish and let us be together peacefully.

Maria: Stop it you two! Jasper, if you truly love me. You should be happy for what makes me happy. And Manulo is my happiness.

Narrator: Jasper realizes that he have been a bad person and now did change for the better. And again started hanging out with Laura more often. Because of what happened, Princess did know that Jasper and Manulo is fighting because of Maria. That made her jealous, envy, and insecure of Maria and made her hate Maria. And she did approach Maria with a slap, but Manulo stopped Princess slap before reaching Maria.

Maria: Oh thank you Manulo, thank you for protecting me.

Manulo: What are you doing Princess? Could you please stop acting like a child. Can you please leave us alone, because you are just jealous. You should change to be better than being like this, for others to also like you. Don't worry Maria, I will always love you and protect you. I will never leave you, I will always be by your side.

Narrator: Princess did not say anything and just leave, and transferred to a another school. Manulo and Maria graduated from college with honors and keeping their relationship strong. And keeping their promises at each other and they live happily ever after.

“The Ugly girl”

By: Chene Rose Gara

Exposition

Characters:

Farah- The type of a girl have an ugky face who would be the first to back down from an argument passesive friends.

Thomas- The father of farah, think that her daughter are the most beautiful.

Claire- The type of a girl that always love farah.

Shane- She is the girl have a bad attitude.

Jake- He is the ond only love farah.

Setting: In Chinese restaurant and school.

Conflict

Farah really didn’t to be feelings misery all her life, Poor farah she didn’t understand that it was not allah but satan who has teasing her! Shane said to her you idiot, your not pretty with your dark skin and that kind of face!

Climax

Farah looked herself, but for once not in a mirror, but during prayer within herself and finally he saw with her own eyes and not with satan’s. She had only opened her eyes now and could finally see it herself. Farah said “I need to keep reminding myself I have a lot more than a lot of others and thank allah all the time.” The farah of farah have a lung cancer.

Resolution

And that day the father of farah sorry for everything what hi’s farah do this for her, The friend of farah and his one and only love they said “farah pls be strong your beautiful, your not an ugly”. And that day farah did not listen the saying of shane foor her.

End

The ending his father love farah, his father dead. And the farah of farah buried of cementery, And shane saying sorry for farah what she’s saying about farah’s face and the friends of farah love her they happy now what is farah personality. Now farah is so happy because they have a friends and hi’s father was in a very silent place.

Narrator: Long time ago there was a girl that name Farah. She is a ugly girl the other people bully about herself that she is a very ugly face. She have a friends name Claire and Jake.

Scene 1

Claire: Hi Farrah

Farah: Hello Claire

Jake: Hi Farah, I'm Jake.

Farah: Hello

Claire: Farah, can i be your friend?

Farah: Yes! sure!

Jake: Me too Farah

Farah: Thank you guys, you have a good heart to be friends with me.

Jake: No problem Farah

Claire: Let's go, we go to canteen to have a snack

Jake: Lets go guys.

Farah: Okay!

(They go to canteen and their have a girl name Shane the snobber, richkid, arte girl)

Shane: (laughing) Farah your so ugly.

Claire: Hey, who are you to judge Farah.

Shane: Me? I'm the only pretty girl in the campus why?

Shane: Oh, Jake why are you here?

Jake: So, what is your problem?

Shane: Oh Jake don't be close to Farah she is a ugly face.

Jake: I don't care

Claire: Let's go guys.

Narrator: Farah went their home and his father angry about her.

Scene 2

Thomas: Farah come with me.

Farah: Yes father?

Thomas: Your the daughter, the bullshit of my life. You know why? because your not so beautiful.

Farah: (crying) why father this is not my fault that I'm not beautiful.

(Farah go to her bed and crying about what father he did for her)

Narrator: In Sunday morning Farah went to Chinese restaurant and calling with Claire and Jake.

Scene 3

Farah: (calling with Claire)

Claire: Yes Farah?

Farah: Where are you?

Claire: I'm her in house now, why?

Farah: Please be her in Chinese restaurant, please?

Claire: Okay Farah.

Farah: (calling with Jake)

Jake: Hi Farah

Farah: Hello Jake, where are you?

Jake: In house, why?

Farah: Please be her in Chinese restaurant, please?

Jake: Okay, no problem Farah.

Narrator: Jake and Claire was going to Farah in Chinese restaurant they saw Farah crying.

Scene 4

Jake: Farah whats happen?

Claire: Farah, why?

Farah: My father told me that I'm not his beautiful daughter, bullshit in his life. (Crying)

Jake: No Farah for me your a beautiful.

Claire: Yes Farah, you are so beautiful.

Farah: Why did Allah do this to me?

Claire: No Farah Allah is a good for us.

Farah: Why? I'm not beautiful to see the people with me.

Jake: Please Farah, don't cry we love you

Farah: Thank you guys!

Jake & Claire: No problem Farah.

Claire: Let's go! we have a group activity in house of Shane.

(In shane house)

Shane: Oh, farah why are you here?

Jake: Farah is part ofbour group.

Claire: Yes shane she is the part of our group.

Shane: Please go outside farah your so ugly

Jake: Shane why are you angry about farah? why?

Shane: (laughing) so? farah is so idiot, farah your not pretty with your dark skin and that kind of face!

Jake: Stop shane!

Farah: Jake i'll go home. (crying)

Jake: Shane you have a bad attitude, be change of that. You love me? So i don't care i don't love you.

Shane: Sorry jake, sorry.

Jake: Your sorry is too late, i love farah. Okay?

Claire: Let's go jake.

Narrator: Farah went their home and she saw his father lying in bed, his father have a sick have a lungs cancer.

Scene 6

Farah: Father, what happen?

Thomas: Farrah, sorry for everything what did i say for you sorry farah.

Farah: It's okay father

Thomas: I love you Farah, sorry that I cannot accept that your not pretty.

Farah: No father it's okay.

Farah: I love you father please don't be die be strong.

Thomas: Sorry Farah, (Farah father died).

Farah: Father wake up, wake up. (Crying)

Narrator: Farah father was burried cementery, she shocked why shane is their in cemetery.

Scene 7

Farah: Why are you here?

Shane: Sorry Farah what i did for you, what i say.

Farah: Its okay Shane.

Shane: Thank you farah (hugged together).

Jake: Farah i have to tell you.

Farah: What is it jake

Jake: I like you farah, i love you.

Shane: Me too jake, i love you too.

Farah and jake got a married. Shane and claire was the one who loves farah. Farah is soo happy because she find her true love and accept her. Now farah have a family 1 boy name zack :)

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