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#i've literally read two long fics 💀

fleursfairies · 7 months

Text

i really dont need some extravagant 100k word fanfiction with slow burns and angst

all i need is a small 1k word fic where they are sitting on the floor of their childhood bedroom with dust particles seen through the golden sun shining through the window. i need a first kiss, someone walking in unexpectedly, cracking a joke, then a sweet scene of them saying "about time 💀"

thats really all i ask for

290 notes · View notes

the-oblivious-writer · 5 months

Text

Comfort Crowd

Core Four x Fem!Reader | Sam Carpenter x Fem!Reader

One-Shot: Social Media Au, No GF Au

Summary: Just you, the core four, and a few other scream characters being chaotic

Warning(s): Swearing, "kys" being thrown around (once & jokingly ofc), no gf au, best friend's older sister & age gap (sam is 25/26 & r is 19)

Notes: First time doing a social media au thing for a fic soo if you have any feedback lemme know. Hope you enjoy, this was honestly fun to make

3/7 for Seven Days Of Christmas

mindythegreat

liked by chadtheman_meeks, ambers_notafreeman, and 8,563 others

mindythegreat: can’t take these bitches anywhere @y/n @justalilguy

view all 8,432 comments…

chadtheman_meeks: I just know your asses are freezing 💀

>justalilguy: SHE THREW ME ASS FIRST

>y/n: THREEWW?? YOU JUMPED ON MY BACK THEN SLIPPED

>justalilguy: LIESS

>y/n: YOU CAN SEE IT SO CLEARLY IN THE FIRST PHOTO

>justalilguy: GASLIGHTER

>y/n: LITERALLY STFUP

chadtheman_meeks: now they're at it in the replies 😭

>ambers_notafreeman: LMAO

—

y/n

liked by justalilguy, chadtheman_meeks, and 4,127 others

y/n: we studying tf outa this exam 😤

view all 2,598 comments...

chadtheman_meeks: you spent the first 20 mins deciding on what playlist to use and then another 10 flirting with the librarian

>y/n: and you spent the first half hour giggling with liv on face time 🤨

mindythegreat: chad knows how to read??

>chadtheman_meeks: fuck you.

justalilguy: I see you've started without me 😒

>y/n: WE WERE SUPPOSED TO MEET LIKE TWO HOURS AGO??

>justalilguy: IT'S NOT MY FAULT MY ALARM DIDN'T GO OFF

>y/n: WE WERE MEETING AT 4 HOW MUCH SLEEP DO YOU NEED???

samcarpenter1997: @justalilguy This is the study session you slept through?

>justalilguy: sam?? since when did you have insta?

>samcarpenter1997: Mindy helped me set up an account

y/n: @justalilguy why have you never told me that your older sister is so breath taking? that's breaking girl code 😔

>justalilguy: no. just no. stay away from her.

>y/n: I was just making an observation? btw can I come over?

>justalilguy: NO.

>y/n: so in 30 mins work? great! tell sammy I won't be long

>justalilguy: YOU DID NOT JUST-

chadtheman_meeks: @justalilguy it's a canon event.

>not_ethanlandry: she hit on my sister too

>justwes: and mine

>livvy: mine too

>ambers_notafreeman: same.

>justalilguy: @y/n you have a fucking problem

—

y/n

liked by ambers_notafreeman, mindythegreat, and 8,752 others

y/n: bro's too stubborn to admit she needs help reaching the top shelf

view all 4,673 comments...

ambers_notafreeman: lmao she's so short not even tip-toeing would help her reach

>mindythegreat: rip amber

>livvy: was nice knowing you ames

>justalilguy: oh? well if I'm so short then ig I can't kiss you

>ambers_notafreeman: I didn't mean it in a bad way bby 😢

>justalilguy: there's a good way? please. enlighten me.

ambers_notafreeman: @y/n wat do I do.

>y/n: hm? oh, sry, I was too busy laughing at your ass being in the doghouse for the 3rd time this week 💀

>ambers_notafreeman: kys.

—

samcarpenter1997

liked by y/n, mindythegreat, and 6,732 others

samcarpenter1997: (sam? putting a caption? funny.)

view all 4,873 comments...

y/n: KSHFSKH I mean- Gorgeous as always 💕

>samcarpenter1997: Thank you! 🙂

>justalilguy: GTFO OF HER COMMENTS as for you @samcarpenter1997 wtf was that???

>samcarpenter1997: Your friend gave me a compliment. I literally just said thank you.

>justalilguy: since when do you actually reply to comments?? second of all, THE EXCLAMATION MARK AND EMOJI??? Sam. for you, that's basically jamming your tongue down her throat

>samcarpenter1997: I was just being polite, you're really overthinking this

>y/n: yeah, @justalilguy just listen to the drop dead gorgeous woman

>samcarpenter1997: @y/n Talking about yourself?

>y/n: oh!! 🤭

>justalilguy: I've died and this is hell.

—

y/n

liked by samcarpenter1997, justwes, and 9,892 others

y/n: me and my fav drummer boy @juswes are back at it again

view all 8,992 comments...

justwes: anything for my favorite guitarist 😊

>y/n: ❤️

chadtheman_meeks: I better be the first to hear it!

>y/n: was there any doubt??

samcarpenter1997: That guitar looks good on you

>y/n: bet you'd suit me better

>samcarpenter1997: We could test that theory

>y/n: oh, how I'd love to

>justalilguy: what. the. actual. fuck.

—

mindythegreat

liked by ambers_notafreeman, chadtheman_meeks, and 8,968 others

mindythegreat: LMAOO guess what she just walked in on

view all 8,572 comments...

chadtheman_meeks: I KNEW IT I KNEW IT

ambers_notafreeman: @justalilguy I just got your text, I'm so sorry babe 😭

>justalilguy: IN THE FUCKING LIVING ROOM

not_ethanlandry: I don't get it?

>justwest: same

>chadtheman_meeks: y/n and sam were making out and Tara saw them...

>justwes: OH...y/n's gonna be annoying asf now right?

>chadtheman_meeks: 100%

—

y/n

liked by samcarpenter1997, nik, and 6,432 others

y/n: LOST IN THE LABYRINTH OF MY MIND

view all 5,897 comments...

justalilguy: this is my new waking nightmare.

>chadtheman_meeks: I tried to warn you

>ambers_notafreeman: you should see the look on her face rn

nik: aww, you guys are so cute together 🥰

>y/n: thank you anika<33

not_ethanlandry: you said you weren't looking for a relationship?

>y/n: with you. I wasn't looking for a relationship with you

>not_ethanlandry: noted

mindythegreat: @ambers_notafreeman pay up

>ambers_notafreeman: @y/n you couldn't have waited another week before posting how down bad you are??

>y/n: the heart wants what the heart wants

samcarpenter1997: 🖤

>y/n: 🤍

>samcarpenter1997: Are you coming over later?

>y/n: ofc I am 😉

>samcarpenter1997: Then I'll see you later, beautiful

>y/n: skhfkhfksh see you 🥰

mindythegreat: @justalilguy weren't you just telling me you think they look good together?

>justalilguy: MINDY

—

chadtheman_meeks

liked by justalilguy, ambers_notafreeman, and 8,997 others

chadtheman_meeks: @y/n was supposed to put them in for 10 minutes...she put them in for 30 😐

view all 8,542 comments...

justalilguy: @y/n how tf do you mess that up

>y/n: I don't appreciate being attacked rn

>justalilguy: hm?

>y/n: ...I wanted them a extra crispy

>justalilguy: you're such a dumbass sometimes 💀

>y/n: actually I'm just a girl

ambers_notafreeman: @y/n aren't you always saying how you'd be a housewife for the right woman and shit

>y/n: that still stands!!

>ambers_notafreeman: how do you expect to do that when you can't even bake cookies??

>y/n: wow. I wasn't expecting such sexism from you- chad maybe but you? it's the betrayal for me 😦

>ambers_notafreeman: idk how I tolerate you

>chadtheman_meeks: um hello???

—

y/n

liked by justalilguy, samcarpenter1997, and 9,896 others

y/n: Merry christler🎄❄️

view all 9,047 comments...

-----------

A/N: Tara and R in a nutshell (poor chad getting caught in the middle)

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dr3c0mix · 1 month

Note

Alistair x (platonically) Teen Reader

In the fic he is like oh my god a bride, he walks in and instead of an adult..or a bride-

They find a teen, who literally threw a pebble at him, an angsty teen💀

I’m very happy to read ur fics and usually pair them with teen/child mc because I find it funny because they expect the love of their life

and teen mc standing there :🧍‍♂️

anyways sorry for the long request, luv ur writing, and ur art :D

Yandere! Evil King x Teen! GN! Reader

CW: platonic relationship, Alistair is a bit of a DILF so do with it as you will, Dads are hot you guys!! READER IS A MINOR.

👑 Who is this sassy lost child?

👑 His minions kidnapped you while you were on a carriage ride back to your kingdom.

👑 He was hoping for like a princess or something to marry and take over the kingdom with or whatever so like...what tf he gonna do with you???

👑 Clearly you were too young to be in a situation like this, but theres no way he's giving you back without a reward, so yes he still holds you for ransom.

👑 "Child, I am Alistair, King of-ACk!"

👑 Did...did you throw a pillow at him?!

👑 "How dare yo- AHK! Stop it!" another one..

👑 You refuse to listen to anything he says, you just wanted to go home

👑 You two had a bit of rivalry for a bit. He hated you and you hated him.

👑 He promised not to show any affection or care towards you since in his eyes, your actions didn't deserve it. How can someone be so rude to a king !?

👑 But he starts to notice you don't eat much. He never sees you in the dining hall and has only seen quick moments of you nibbling on some bread or pastries the servants gave you.

👑 He scoffed, so irresponsible! You must eat a proper meal right this second or you'll starve!

👑 You're surprised to see a meal prepared for you during your routine trip to get a snack from the pantry with a note on the plate.

👑 "Next time, ask for a proper meal. I don't want your parents to think I've been starving you. -Alistair P.S. go to bed early."

👑 Huh...

👑 Alistair smiled from the doorway of the dining hall, watching you eat up with a smile on your face. You might have been too scared of him to ask for food so you've been sneaking snacks while he wasn't looking.

👑 Of course he wasn't doing it because he cared about you, he just didn't want royalty like you to resort to such pathetic means to eat!

👑 Why are you still sad? Perhaps he should get you some things to keep your attention..

👑 He asks (threateningly may I add) about your hobbies or interests.

👑 The next morning your cell (which has been upgraded to a lovely room in the castle because he didn't want you to be filthy and gross in a dungeon) was filled with anything he could find that he thought you'd enjoy.

👑 Don't think he wants you to be happy! He's just tired of seeing you sulk everywhere!

👑 He denies everything, but you swear you could see a tiny smile on his face when you hugged him happily.

👑 You start being a little more open to him, showing him anything you've made or done with pride and he'd receive it gratefully, but he won't show it of course.

👑 "I made you this friendship bracelet!"

👑 "I've seen better jewelry."

👑 "Oh I'll take it back then I guess.."

👑 "No, it's mine now, back off."

👑 Drawings and the like that he said would be thrown out as soon as you left would be seen framed in his room

👑 It would be a..waste of good canvas..

👑 And of course he buys a few books of your choice for you to read, he'd be damned if your brain turns to mush.

👑 Bro bro he'd be the type to let you swing around while holding onto his bicep.

👑 If you ever have any problems, or come to him in a bad mood, he'd have no idea how to help other than to sit down and listen to your troubles.

👑 He's not the most physical when it comes to affection, but you bet your ass he's gonna do everything he can to cheer you up.

👑 At this point he's rewriting his demands for the ransom. Either your kingdom lets him sign some adoption papers or he's starting a war.

#yandere #yandere x gn reader #male yandere #yandere oc #oc yandere #yandere male #yandere x reader #yandere x male reader #tw yandere #x reader #x gn reader #gn reader #yandere x you #yandere x darling #king x reader #yandere king #evil king #platonic #platonic reader

347 notes · View notes

jeonqkooks · 1 year

Text

our beloved summer (05) | jjk

You made a vow to hate Jeon Jungkook ever since he packed up and left you without a single explanation, but when he shows up at your door after years of radio silence, it turns out that maybe your resolve isn't as strong as you thought.

pairing: producer!jungkook x songwriter!reader

genre/warnings: exes au, fluff, angst, eventual smut, drinking, swearing, crying, Sad Boy JK Hours ??, valentino!yoongi bc that should be a whole warning 🥵 even though he's there and not really there for literally 2 seconds lol

rating: PG-15

word count: 9.5k

note: this is the most stressed out i've ever been while trying to post a fic 💀 argh anyway, 2 obs updates in one month ?? is this even real life !! consider this a (lunar) new year's present from me to everyone who celebrates it and also to everyone who doesn't !! idk i'm bad at notes and i'm delirious so that's it 😗

series masterpost / main playlist ; interactive playlist ; moodboards ; taglist

— as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

Hey, I feel like if we gave it one night You'd hate me less and make it alright Just wish that we could fight now I'd hold you on the comedown

Rockland - Gracie Abrams

One thing about you, is that you don’t do well with change.

After you moved out of the first apartment you got as an adult, you constantly went back to your old neighborhood even though it wasn’t close to your new place. You kept walking those familiar streets, kept shopping at the stores where the workers knew your name. At night, you still pictured yourself living there, with all of your furniture and clothes and decorations that you’ve already emptied from those old bones. Then, you imagined what the new tenant was like, if they could feel the lingering love you had for that apartment. You wondered if they were putting the coffee table you left behind to good use, or if they thought that it looked out of place among all of their belongings and had already thrown it away.

Jimin called you weird for that, but he didn’t know that you always leave a piece of yourself everywhere you go. The biggest pieces, you think, are hidden somewhere in a closet in your childhood bedroom where your mother still lives, and in the tiny space of your dorm room where you spent most of your college years.

It took you more than half a year to finally start considering your new apartment home.

Because you hate change. Change is scary. Change is walking into a pitch-black tunnel with no flashlight, not knowing what awaits you in the darkness and not knowing if you’ll make it to the other side.

That isn’t to say that change is inherently bad. You’ve experienced good changes before. Arguably, Jungkook was a good change when he went from someone you couldn’t tolerate, to the love of your life back then. You were happy with him, so blissfully happy that for a while, you forgot what it was like to experience any other emotion.

Yoongi has always been your friend. It didn’t take you two very long to become well acquainted with one another and from there, develop a good friendship. You have never thought of him as anything other than a friend. Even when he was your boss, he still felt more like a friend.

As you sit next to him in a bar too empty for your liking – but seems right for a Tuesday night – you feel a palpable shift between the two of you.

When your phone vibrates with a notification, you glance at it only to exhale annoyedly – unclear whether this frustration is directed toward yourself, or the person blowing up your mobile; maybe it’s both. That’s the nth message that Jungkook has sent you in the last couple of hours, and you don’t need to read it to know that it’s probably another iteration of the same apology. How many different ways are there to say “Hey, I’m sorry for fucking the receptionist and then having the balls to tell you that you’re the unprofessional one when you didn’t even do anything.” Apparently a lot, because the texts just keep coming.

“Jungkook again?” Yoongi asks from beside you. Fuck. You’ve mostly been silently moping since he brought you here, too enmeshed in your own web of muddled thoughts that you forgot he’s someone you need to make amends with too.

You give him a nod but still continue to stare at the drink in front of you, trying to disentangle your Yoongi thoughts from your Jungkook ones.

Taking a sip of your drink, your face manages to keep a grimace at bay as the liquid ambushes your tastebuds. You don’t like whiskey, but you need something to hate more than yourself tonight. When you set the glass down, the alcohol sloshes around like a compact sea of your own amber-colored miseries.

“I’m sorry,” you say finally. “This is unfair to you. I don’t know what came over me. I just want you to know that this isn’t me responding to…” To your confession.

“If you’re about to say what I think you’re about to say, then I have to stop you right now.”

“Yoongi…”

“I’m not saying that you can’t turn me down, although I hope you don’t do that,” he chuckles. “I’m just saying that whatever you do, whether you give me a chance or reject me, I want you to decide after you’ve really thought about it, about me.”

You can’t say no to that; it’s only fair. Yoongi knows what he deserves. You haven’t looked at him in any other way, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t. Didn’t you say it yourself, that maybe you should start putting yourself out there? Well, here is someone coming to you before you even have to look anywhere. You may not have expected Yoongi, but then, you didn’t expect Jungkook either.

Yoongi could be the good change you need.

Nevertheless, you want to tell him you’re sorry for the other night. It should be fairly simple, but the words have a hard time dislodging themselves from your throat.

“I’m sorry about what I said that night at dinner… and what I did…”

Yoongi props an elbow on the bar top and leans forward to rest his chin in the palm of his hand, his eyes glimmering with mischief. “Remind me what it is that you did again?”

“Come on, I’m serious.” You are grateful that he’s trying to keep it light, though.

“I’m serious too. I seem to have forgotten.”

“Yoongi…”

“Yes, Y/N?”

You sigh, shutting your eyes momentarily. Recalling the moment makes you flush with embarrassment, bringing a splash of color to your cheeks which Yoongi always seems to enjoy.

In a quiet voice, you say, “I’m sorry for throwing salt at you…”

“You threw salt at me!” He tips his head back, laughing freely. The bartender spares you two a glance at the sudden disruption. “You shouldn’t go around throwing salt at people!”

“Stop laughing! I’m trying to apologize.” You punch his arm out of habit and for a second there, you forget that your relationship with Yoongi isn’t the same anymore. Changed forever.

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop. Jeez, why are you so violent?” He rubs the spot where you hit him, muttering under his breath something about him bruising like a peach. “Apology accepted. No hard feelings.”

“Okay, good. But I still want you to know that if you were expecting anything from tonight…”

Yoongi ruffles your hair with a scoff. “I’m not that dense. Of course I’m not expecting anything.” When you peer at him with curious and unsure eyes, he continues, “Y/N, earlier you looked like you wanted to set the place on fire and Jungkook looked like he was about to shit himself. Tonight, I’m just a friend who’s here for you if you want to vent. We’re just two buddies having a drink, that’s all.”

He makes it sound so simple, while your brain is already going haywire.

Despite yourself, you chuckle at his words. You tell him how much you appreciate it, though you don’t really tell him anything about what happened this afternoon, just that Jungkook said some stuff that pissed you off. You can’t tell him exactly what Jungkook did to anger you without alluding to the confession for which Yoongi is letting you off the hook for now.

“Do you wanna come with me tomorrow?” Yoongi asks.

“Come with you where?”

“I have a shoot with Valentino in the morning.”

“You have a photoshoot not even 12 hours from now and you’re here drinking? Aren’t you gonna wake up puffy or something?”

“Yeah, my manager would kill me if she knows what I’m doing,” he replies casually, like his manager has a telepathic connection with him and she can sense him mocking her over a drink. When people see Agust D, they tend to only see the icy exterior that he dons. That tough, maybe even callous, image has sustained him in the entertainment industry for years. For many, Agust D seems intimidating and unapproachable. That’s how you felt when you first met him too. But after a while, you got to see Min Yoongi, and Min Yoongi is nothing if not warm and tender-hearted, even if he’s a little shit sometimes. At least, that’s what he has always been like to you. “She thinks I’m getting my beauty sleep right now.”

You lightly snort at that, telling him, “Yeah, you need it.”

When you start to yawn, Yoongi calls a driver to drop you off at your place. The ride is mostly silent, because you’re tired and because you’re not sure what to say to Yoongi in the presence of a stranger taking you home. The car pulls up to your building soon enough, and before you can step out and tell him goodnight, he offers to walk you up. He takes the elevator with you to your floor, how gallant but unnecessary. When you reach your door, you wonder whether you should invite him in for a glass of water or something. If this was a week – or even just a couple of days – earlier, you would’ve had no reason to hesitate. He doesn’t ask if he can come in but instead takes one of your hands.

“I see you’ve been giving yourself some TLC. They’re a lot better now,” he comments, smoothing his thumb over your skin. You’ve been diligent with your hand care routine since he gave you that lotion. It feels nice, and it smells amazing. Besides, your hands were starting to hurt anyway.

Silence descends upon the two of you as you become aware of Yoongi touching you, and the weight of the answer you’ve yet to give him. He must feel you stiffen, because he lets you go and smiles.

“Relax, princess. Get some sleep, you’re the one who needs it. I said I’ll let you think about it, didn’t I? Stop stressing so much.” His index finger taps your cheek playfully, so familiar yet so foreign at the same time. The wink that he tacks on makes you roll your eyes. You watch Yoongi make his way to the elevator, step in and press the button for the ground floor. He maintains eye contact with you as he waits for the doors to shut, and you don’t think you’ve really noticed before how Yoongi carries himself with such confidence and poise even when he’s off-camera. That’s just the kind of person he is and it’s… kind of attractive.

You can’t even fish around in your bag for your keys, you just stand there because he keeps your gaze trained on him. His eyes are alluring even under the shitty lighting of your building’s elevator. Before the lift closes, his voice carries over from the metal box to your door, and you don’t know if it’s the echo of his low timbre in the empty hallway that makes you shiver, or if it’s just Yoongi.

“I’ve waited this long, what’s a little more time?”

One week. This is a record for you and Taehyung.

You’re still baffled by his attitude that night, and no one has cleared anything up for you. He was right, but that doesn’t mean you were wrong. You stand by your initial reaction. Could anyone really blame you for that? In your defense, who the fuck could believe that a worldclass megastar has romantic feelings for them? Not to mention that the person whom the megastar in question has feelings for is you! You, the pathetic girl who can’t seem to get over her ex. Yoongi had to sit through a whole hour of you drunkenly crying over Jungkook, for fuck’s sake!

That really wasn’t your best moment, but it’s not like you even remember it anyway.

Your phone buzzes to life with Jimin’s face taking over the whole screen – a photo of your hand squishing his full cheeks until his lips jut out. “Hey Minnie,” you greet him once you’ve swiped to accept the call.

“Y/N,” he says, sounding out of breath. “Where are you?”

“I’m at home. Where are you? Are you doing pull-ups again? You know you practically hyperventilate when you do more than 3.”

“Shut up, I’m at dance practice. But listen, have you talked to Tae yet?”

You purse your lips at the mention of his name. “No. We’re supposed to go grocery shopping tomorrow like we always do, but I guess that won’t be happening.”

Jimin hums, like he’s in thought. He doesn’t speak again until his breathing has calmed. “Well, can you go to his place right now?”

“Why?”

“He’s sick and I’m kind of worried about him. He hasn’t answered my messages.”

You frown. “Tae’s sick?”

“Yeah, he must’ve caught a cold the other day. Could you go over there and check on him? I would go but I can’t leave for another few hours.”

You agree to go, because of course you would. Even if you’re stubborn and hot-headed, no amount of pettiness could make you ignore your friends especially when they’re unwell and need somebody. Especially when it’s Taehyung who’s been there for you so many times.

You stay on the call with Jimin for another ten whole minutes even after you have said you would go, because he keeps droning on and on about how shitty Taehyung looked yesterday.

Before you go to your best friend’s apartment, you stop by your regular diner to pick up some comfort food for him, and the pharmacy for some medicine. During the rest of the drive there, you start getting a little worried. When Taehyung takes care of a sick you or Jimin, he practically goes into full mama bear mode, making sure that you’re as comfortable as humanly possible and not leaving your side until you’re a functional human being again. But when it comes to his own wellbeing, Taehyung doesn’t seem to be that concerned. It’s not that he neglects his health, but you wish that he would show himself the same kindness that he shows you.

It feels weird to use the spare key that you have to his place, considering that you aren’t really on speaking terms. In hindsight, it feels so childish. How old are you to still be pulling the silent treatment on each other?

You ring the doorbell and wait a couple minutes until you hear Taehyung shuffling to get the door from the other side. When it swings open, he tenses up a bit, not expecting to see you at all. His hair is damp; he must’ve just gotten out of the shower. Taehyung doesn’t look as bad as Jimin described though. Just some dark circles under his eyes.

You raise a hand and wave. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he parrots somewhat awkwardly. It’s understandable; neither of you thought you’d be the one to break the ice. “What are you doing here?”

Bringing your other hand up, you show him the bag you’re holding. “Brought you soup and cold meds. Jimin said you’re sick.”

His brows knit together in confusion. “Thanks…” he says slowly, “but I’m not sick?”

“But Jimin said you caught a cold and you’ve been wheezing like a dying fisherman and–” You purse your lips, catching onto what’s really happening here. “He tricked me, didn’t he?”

Park Jimin…

Taehyung tuts under his breath, shaking his head at the ground. “Mhmm.”

“He could go into acting. He sounded really worried on the phone, like you were on the verge of death.”

“No, yeah, he really could,” Taehyung agrees. “Jimin is bizarrely good at lying sometimes. We should be worried about that.”

You laugh, and that makes him feel like the air is relaxed enough for him to laugh too. It only lasts a few seconds before you’re left staring at each other again. You hate it. You really, really hate it.

You thought that the universe sent you a sign, gave you a reason to come over and make nice with your best friend. Turns out that “the universe” is really just Park Jimin and his scheming tongue. But you’re already here, and you have to talk to him eventually. Jimin might have lied, but you would’ve just waited for Taehyung to reach out first to offer an olive branch anyway.

“Well, can I come in?” you ask. It’s weird that you even have to ask.

“Of course,” he says absentmindedly, stepping to one side to let you in. He takes the bag from your hand and brings it to the kitchen while you kick off your shoes and change into the pair of fuzzy bear slippers that he keeps for you here.

You want to tell him what happened as much as you hate admitting that you were wrong.

“Have you eaten?” you ask, a sad attempt at delaying what will inevitably come.

“No,” comes his simple reply.

“Should we eat? I bought enough for two people.”

“But I’m not sick.”

“You don’t have to be sick to eat chicken noodle soup.”

Taehyung looks at you like the thought has genuinely never crossed his mind. “Interesting… Okay, then.”

You put on an episode of your favorite show while he heats up the food. When you both sit down to eat, it’s mostly silent while the TV continues to play. The most you and Taehyung thing that you exchange in these 30 minutes is him saying soup tastes like shit when you’re not actually sick, and you telling him to stop being such a hater. When you both finish, Taehyung rinses the bowls and puts them in his dishwasher.

Before you came over, you thought you would only be making him eat, take his meds, and sit there for a bit while he sleeps. If you had known this would happen, you would’ve prepared yourself for it.

But then again, you were tricked into coming.

Ugh. Just do it. You are so freaking dramatic.

“Well,” you start, keeping your voice light and trying not to stand around like you’re out of place in his apartment, “you were right.”

“About what?” Taehyung asks, wiping his hands on a towel.

“About Yoongi and… all that.”

“Oh.” His expression is one you aren’t too familiar with. There’s surprise – yes, that you’re making peace with him – in the way his brows slightly lift, but there’s something else too. Something odd that you can’t quite put a finger on, and it makes you slightly uneasy because you don’t like it when you can’t read Taehyung.

He’s pretty quick to mask it, and it makes you even more conscious that there’s something he isn’t telling you. Of course, this feeling is miniscule, practically a seed compared to the blooming garden of nerves that the events of these past few days have dumped upon you, so you can’t categorize it as a high-level priority to nitpick. You need to deal with your main concerns first, aka what to do about Yoongi and Jungkook, both individually and together, and then you can begin to inspect what’s going on with Taehyung.

It all sounds so easy in theory.

Taehyung goes to the couch and you wordlessly follow. You sit down when he pats the spot next to him – your spot. “How did you come to that conclusion?” he asks. “You know I don’t get to hear you tell me I’m right very often.”

Because you aren’t right very often, is what you almost say. It’s light and playful, and you both know it would diffuse the leftover tension, but you chuck the words aside in favor of something more serious. There isn’t that much to catch him up on, but there is a lot to unpack from the few things that did transpire over the last few days.

You give him a recap of what happened with Yoongi and subsequently what happened with Jungkook. Those are the two things weighing the most on your mind. You haven’t really processed anything; blame it on Yoongi for telling you that you have time to think things through.

One thing you love about Taehyung is that he doesn’t tell you what to do, but rather helps you sort things out on your own. Come to think of it, these conversations often take place on his couch. He’s like your own personal therapist at this point.

“Can you give me a hug?” You probably can’t ask a licensed therapist to do this, though.

He softens even more with a smile. Opening his arms, he says, “C’mere.”

You shuffle over to sink into his embrace. You sigh as you practically melt in his hold. Taehyung is a little bony, but hugging him feels exactly like hugging a giant teddy bear. He’s soft, and always knows how to hold you just tight enough, how to stroke your hair the way you like, how to be just the comforting presence you need amidst a whirlwind of anxious thoughts. And he smells like jasmine, though that might be because you keep deliberately gifting him colognes with scents that you like.

With your chin perched on his shoulder, you feel yourself start to relax, walls coming down if only briefly.

“You okay?” Taehyung asks after a moment.

You’re suddenly aware that you’re crying. You don’t know how it started, but now that the waterworks have begun, it seems like there’s no stopping. “No,” you sniffle. “Can I just…”

You feel him exhale. “Of course.”

Taehyung is one of the few people – oh who are you kidding? He might be the only one – whom you feel comfortable enough around to let yourself cry to your heart’s content.

You’ve been feeling it for days now, even before all that shit happened. Every cell in your body is constantly vibrating, with anxiety, with guilt, with a heaviness that sinks into your bones. You’re shaking even when your hands are perfectly still. People, memories, thoughts you keep only to yourself – they all phase through you, not giving you a single moment to catch your breath.

When it rains, it pours.

Everything is weighing you down like someone has tied you to an anchor and pushed you into the unrelenting, unforgiving water. Grief is an ocean and you don’t know how to swim. Your job, your friends, the unbridled mess that you call a love life… Everything is changing and you’re the same. You’re different, but somehow still the same. Deep down, you’re still that scared little girl who doesn’t know what to make of the world. Your knees are bleeding but your mother is telling you not to cry. Why can’t you cry when you’re hurting? Every minute feels like a lifetime but every day feels like it’s going by in two seconds. Things are moving so fast. Things are moving too slow. You can’t remember the last time you actually cried. Really cried. Bawled. Sobbed. Let out all the dirt until you can see your roots again. Until you originate back to being a blank canvas. Sometimes it feels like that’s the only way that can help you see things more clearly. Your vision might blur for a while but afterward, it’ll have washed everything away. At least a little bit. So you can get your footing again.

You miss clarity, or the illusion that you have any control over your life. You miss looking out the window and have something to look forward to, even on overcast days where the sun can’t be bothered to bring you light. You miss hearing your heart beat a melody that doesn’t ache, doesn’t rattle you to the core. Pieces of you have been held together by nothing but tape and glue for the longest time. Eventually, they’ll deteriorate, and you’ll go back to being skin and bones always on the verge of falling apart.

Some of your best writing was never meant for anybody to hear. The best lines that you’ve scribbled down are diary entries disguised as music, as poetry. They’re results of your lowest and weakest moments, it just happens that there was a journal lying around and you thought that if you had to keep all that sadness inside for a second longer, you would burst. Those immortalized lines represent your heartbreak, your self-hatred, your sorrow and your grief. They come from a lifetime of unshed tears, from the burden of having a heart that feels too much but is always silenced. Words are your escape when time rushes through you like a child skipping stones. Everything hurts all the time but no one knows and you don’t bother explaining to anyone how you wish you could be a different person living a different life because it seems like the universe has made a mistake with this one. How it feels like a divine power has miscalculated and misread your false stoicism as resilience. Just because a person carries it well doesn’t mean they have to carry it at all.

Sometimes you like to muse that if anyone could catch a glimpse of what it’s like inside, they’d think, Wow. How are you holding all of that weight? How are you so silent through it all? How do you live with an ache so allconsuming that I can hardly see you underneath it?

It’s the only way you know how to express yourself. But even then, when you’re screaming and burning, you’re still quiet. Those words are your heart on paper, raw and bleeding all over the place, covered in a million cracks that no one can see or even pay enough attention to notice. They’re there whether anybody likes it or not. They’re right there, red ink staining white pages, begging in a voice small like a child asking for love. Please see me. I’m here. Nobody taught me how to swim. Please see me.

But nobody does. They walk past you every day. They sit with you, smile at you and laugh with you. They leave you. They stay. They break your heart. Even when they love you, nobody sees you.

You love Taehyung, but you don’t think he understands. He knows you better than almost everyone in this world and he tries to help you in any way he can, but at the end of the day, maybe this isn’t something that a person can understand even if they want to. It’s worse, to realize that perhaps it isn’t because people don’t care enough to see it, but that no matter how hard they try, they can’t.

The only person who has ever come the closest is Jungkook, with his big doe eyes that always see through you and see into you. Sometimes, you think there might be parts of you that he could see but you still don’t. He knew things about yourself that you never want anybody to find out, and he loved you anyway. He went the lengths that nobody ever did because they all gave up after a while. Someone once told you that you felt like a fortress wall impossible to climb, that nobody had the time, the patience to wait for you. In other words, you weren’t worth it. Not worthless, just not worth the effort it would take to break down your walls.

But Jungkook showed up and tried, every day. The one person that you never saw coming. You might have resisted at first, but then you became his biggest supporter. You were rooting for him to know you, how fucked up is that? You were right there. He was so close.

And then he stopped.

You suppose that’s what makes everything awful now – to know that you should let go of him when he’s the only person who ever came that close.

You don’t know how long Taehyung has had to sit here, comforting you like this, but at one point, your stomach starts growling and you feel your best friend trying to hold back a giggle. Jungkook might have mastered the art of loving you, but Taehyung is an expert at comforting you.

“Shut up.” You wipe away the dampness on your cheeks with the back of your hand and push Taehyung off. “Crying makes me hungry.”

“Should I order us fried chicken then?”

“And soju. Get some soju too.”

Jimin is a strategic trickster. There was no dance practice. He just ran around his apartment ten times until his breathing turned ragged, which if you ask anyone, was completely unnecessary. He’s very extra, but at least it was effective.

After he got off the phone with you, Jimin immediately went to your shared phone tracker app – today was one of those times where it proves to be the most useful. He stared at the little circle with a silly photo of you as it moved from your address to Taehyung’s with a couple pit stops along the way. Jimin giggled to himself when he saw your circle meet Taehyung’s, because at that point you two must have realized already that you’d been swindled. Of course, there was always a chance of you leaving the moment you figured out you had come all that way for no reason at all, but when Jimin saw after a couple of hours that the two circles are still next to each other, he knew that you and Taehyung made up already.

Jimin sends a message to your group chat, a simple hello but Taehyung knows what he’s trying to get at. The text thread shared by the three of you lights up with a selfie of you and Taehyung each holding a chicken drumstick and wearing a content smile. In the background, there are some soju bottles, a box of chicken and some fries.

Jimin doesn’t question why your eyes look a little puffier than usual. He just replies with a smiley emoji and a thumbs up. The triumph of his mini victory almost makes him forget that there’s someone else in his home.

Jungkook peeks over Jimin’s shoulder to peek at his phone, curious to see what’s making his friend so delighted. When he sees you and Taehyung on Jimin’s screen, he sinks again, heart sitting in the pit of his stomach. The words you told him just the day before ring loud in his ears, as if they haven’t been stuck on his mind, playing on a loop.

You’re such a fucking hypocrite.

You weren’t wrong, but man, did that feel like a punch in the gut.

He goes to sit across from Jimin, taking note of every single sound that notifies his friend of a new message. For the first time, he feels like an outsider, like he’s intruding on a private moment.

“I fucked up,” Jungkook admits quietly, cracking open a can of beer and taking a long sip. It makes Jimin look up and put away his phone. “With Y/N,” Jungkook clarifies.

“Yeah, I’ve been informed. That was the stupidest thing you’ve done in a while.”

“In a while? When was the last time I did something stupid?”

Jimin doesn’t even have to think about it. He answers right away, “When you left her.”

Jungkook hums, unclear whether the noise is meant in agreement or just in acknowledgment. His tongue darts out to swipe across his dry lips before he breathes out. “I don’t know what to do. She hasn’t replied to any of my texts. I feel like a fucking asshole.”

“From what I’ve been told, you were a fucking asshole,” Jimin says lightly, his words emphasized with a chuckle like he finds Jungkook’s predicament so funny. “I can’t believe you would say that shit about Yoongi to her right after he confessed.”

Cue a pregnant pause, and a pair of doe eyes staring right into Jimin’s skull, unable to decipher if what he’s hearing is a joke or not.

“Yoongi– what?”

Jimin slaps himself internally. Shit. It slipped, he swears. “Nothing,” he sighs, but he knows it wouldn’t be dropped so easily.

“No. Not nothing,” Jungkook sits up straight and puts his chilled beer down on the table, missing the coaster entirely just to piss off his friend. “The fuck do you mean Yoongi confessed? Confessed what?”

Jimin sighs with pursed lips. “What else? What do you think he confessed to?”

Jungkook gulps, and blinks a few times. When? Why? Was that the reason you looked so distraught yesterday before all that shit went down between you and him? Who confesses to someone in a freaking break room?

Then Jungkook remembers that you and Yoongi went out for drinks last night. What did he say? What did you say? His stomach churns at the thought of something… happening between the two of you.

Jimin takes in his friend’s dumbfounded expression. “Why are you shocked?” he asks. “I thought you expected something like this. Isn’t it why you spewed all that crap about Yoongi flirting with her?”

“Fuck, I don’t know! It feels like the guy is out to get me for some goddamn reason. I thought he was just playing with Y/N to piss me off!”

Jimin shakes his head, looking thoughtful. “Yoongi wouldn’t do that to her.”

“How would you know?”

“Because when they first worked together, from the things that she told us, the stuff that Yoongi would do for her, Taehyung and I thought he liked her back then too,” Jimin says. “This has nothing to do with you.”

It sucks. It fucking sucks.

“Should I go over there?” Jungkook asks, a newfound sense of urgency in his voice that borderlines panic. He’s acting like this fact that Jimin just dumped upon him is unraveling just as this conversation is taking place, but in reality, he’s one of the last people to know.

“And tell her what? If you’ve said sorry a million times and she hasn’t responded, then saying it one more time won’t change anything.”

“What am I supposed to do when I see her tomorrow?”

“Nothing? Are you incapable of leaving things alone? If she wants to ignore you, let her ignore you. If she wants to yell at you, let her yell at you. If she wants nothing to do with you, let her do that too. Why do you keep making things worse for yourself?”

Jungkook runs a frustrated hand through his hair. “So your solution is for me to just let her hate me?”

Jimin levels him with a look, which just annoys him even more. “You had no problem with that before.”

“If you’re not gonna help me, should I ask Taehyung then?”

“Don’t go to Tae about this.”

“Why not?”

“Just don’t,” Jimin snaps, and it makes Jungkook falter for a few seconds before the petulance in him clouds his better judgment.

“Why? He’s her best friend. They’re practically joined at the hip. He’s gotta be able to help me with this.”

“You really want to go to Taehyung for advice on how to suck up to your ex-girlfriend? He’s the most protective of her. What makes you think he would be willing to help you?”

“He’s my friend too, isn’t he? Shouldn’t he want to help all of us be civil with each other?”

“Yeah, he’s your friend. I’m your friend and Y/N’s too. And you’re right, all of us should get along, but we shouldn’t be put in a situation where we’d have to try. You did that to us and nothing is going to be the same again. I don’t even know why you did it. You kept your mouth shut for years no matter how hard me and Taehyung tried to get it out of you. Now you suddenly can’t make peace with the consequences of your actions? Now you want us to help you win over the person you fucked over, who is also our closest friend? I don’t get you, JK. I’m starting to regret not letting Taehyung punch you back then.”

Jungkook stares at his friend. Is this shock that he’s feeling? He still remembers that night, because he doesn’t forget a lot of things. He can’t forget it. He had never seen Taehyung – who is usually so calm and cordial – get that angry before. His friend, who is a saint of a man, felt so much rage toward Jungkook that Jimin had to physically hold him back.

“What? Why are you looking at me like that?” Jimin asks. “You’re not used to me not being on your side all the time?”

He knows that. The only person who seems to be on Jungkook’s side is himself, and sometimes he isn’t sure if this is even true at all. What you told him at the dance studio’s opening party, what Jimin is telling him now, and even the things that Taehyung shouted at him a couple of years back – it’s all true. He knows these things already, but it feels different to hear them from other people. You’re all right; nobody is overreacting. To an outsider, it might come across as harsh, but to anyone who knows anything, it’s rightfully deserved.

Nevertheless, Jungkook admits quietly, “Actually, yeah.”

Jimin sighs, because he knows that his friend has no malicious intent toward you or toward anyone. Jimin knows that Jungkook doesn’t mean to hurt you, any more than he already has. Jungkook is even more crazed now that Yoongi is somehow a factor in all of this. It’s the insecurities bubbling at the surface. He’s panicking and he can’t even see straight. This is just his own stupid take on fight or flight. It was flight for a while, and now apparently it’s not. Jimin doesn’t really understand it, but he gets that this is his friend’s way of dealing with shit. “I tried, man. I did. But it’s really, really hard to have your back on this.”

Jungkook is well aware of it too – that to leave you alone is probably the best thing he can do at this point. Everything he says or does seems to backfire; instead of pulling you closer, all he manages to do is push you further away and make you hate him more than you already do.

But in a way, isn’t that a good thing? Better to have you hate him than be indifferent toward him. After all, there’s a thin line between love and hate. You yourself blurred this line long ago. You can do it again, can’t you?

Jungkook sits there for a while longer to finish his beer, even though he doesn’t have anything else to say. It’s clear what Jimin’s stance on this is, and no matter what he says, it’s unlikely that anyone will help him try and get back in your good graces.

Before he leaves, Jimin says something that makes him nauseous. Makes him want to fucking cry and kick something and speed over to your apartment just so you could reassure Jungkook that he’s still the one you hate the most. That all of your feelings, whether they’re good or bad, are still reserved for him and only him.

It isn’t what his best friend should tell him, but it’s what a good friend would say. It's not about Jungkook, it's not about Jimin or Taehyung or anyone else. It's about you, who has been hurt the most here.

“If she wants to choose Yoongi, let her do that too.”

[10:48] Yoongi: Attachment: 2 Images.

[10:49] Yoongi: got yelled at for showing up puffy yesterday

You tap on the notifications and the photos pop up within seconds. It’s Yoongi at his Valentino shoot probably. He never used to send you stuff like this, nor asked you to come watch him at his photoshoots. Why would he?

You zoom in on his face to inspect if he really was puffy, but you can’t really tell. Maybe if you were a makeup artist with a sharper eye, you would see it. But under your regular-person gaze, everything seemed fine. Yoongi looked handsome in the pictures.

[10:55] You: you don’t look puffy to me

[10:57] Yoongi: so how do i look to you? ;)

[10:58] You: the fits look good

[11:01] Yoongi: i wasn’t asking about the fits

[11:05] You: and i’m telling you the fits look good anyway

[11:07] Yoongi: what about the model?

[11:10] You: are you fishing for compliments?

[11:11] Yoongi: what if i am?

[11:14] You: the model looks Not Puffy

[11:16] Yoongi: you’re no fun ;(

You consider your next reply for a moment. It doesn’t seem like that big a deal. You want to send it. It seems innocent enough, and it’s the truth. A simple praise can’t hurt, right?

Your fingertips tingle just typing the words out. You’re suddenly so jittery for some reason as your thumb hovers over the arrow symbol that would whoosh away your message. It's a good kind of jittery. You might even say that you’re excited.

[11:22] You: the model looks good too

You put your phone face-down on the table, not even checking when it vibrates with Yoongi’s response to your latest text. It’s so weird that you’re feeling like this, maybe because it’s been so long since someone has shown an actual interest in you? Or is it because it’s Yoongi? If it were anyone else, would you still react the same?

It’s weird, but not necessarily weird in a bad way. You just aren’t used to it, or it’s been such a long time that you forgot what it feels like to be… wanted? You don’t think about it often but it’s true, you’ve missed the thrill of being chased.

“So… word on the street is you have a secret song.”

Seokjin’s voice makes you glance up, wondering who he could be talking to when the only people in the room beside him are you and Jungkook – whom you haven’t spoken a word to all morning despite him glancing not-so-subtly at you every two seconds. When you got here this morning, there was already a chai latte on the table with your name on it. The order was too specific for it to be Seokjin, but you didn’t say anything.

“The street?” you ponder for a moment, knowing exactly who the culprit is. “Is that what Yoongi calls himself these days? He’s been here for what? A couple weeks? And he’s already blabbed to you.”

“So it’s true?” Seokjin leans back in his chair, a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Yoongi said it’s real good. Top shelf kinda stuff. And you know he never says things like that.”

It’s not a song, or at least that isn’t what you would call it. Maybe more like an essay composed of sentences that go together like misfit puzzle pieces. You don’t think you would ever rework it and pitch it to anyone because it’s yours and it’s personal. You would never tell anyone about it, and Yoongi wouldn’t have come to know about its existence if he hadn’t stumbled across it in your journal by accident.

“Don’t listen to Yoongi,” you say. “At this point, I feel like you should know that Yoongi tends to exaggerate sometimes.”

“He never seems to be exaggerating when it comes to you,” Seokjin muses. You almost blush, thinking about what else Yoongi could’ve told Seokjin. He doesn’t notice the split second in which your cheeks redden just the slightest, or he doesn’t mind it enough to comment. “What’s the title?”

You shrug, saying nothing.

“You can’t even tell me the title? Damn, Y/N. Are you the CIA?”

“I’m not telling you because there is no title. There’s not even a song, just something I go back to sometimes. It’s mostly just word vomit. I promise you, it’s nothing.”

“Tell that to Yoongi. He told me whoever’s gonna get that song is one hell of a lucky bastard.”

Again, what is it with the praise? You know working with Yoongi and being associated with his last album gave your career a boost, but you weren’t aware that he was talking about you with other people. Maybe he only does it with Seokjin because they’re close, but still, it makes you itch with curiosity.

“By any chance are you gonna give it to… me?” Seokjin asks, and seems to immediately hear how flawed it sounds. You stare at him blankly, trying to bite back an amused smile, and even Jungkook turns his head to look too. Seokjin’s ears turn red in an instant. “Okay, that came out kinda wrong. I’m really, really sorry. But you know what I mean.”

You continue to stare at him until his face is so flushed, you swear he’s like a tomato that’s about to burst. You can see why Yoongi likes to tease people this way. “Okay, boss,” you acquiesce with a laugh, relieving Seokjin of the fear that he genuinely offended you. “If the song ever gets to see the light of day, I’ll make sure to ask you to lend your voice.”

“Ah, so you admit it’s a song.” He grins brightly at your empty promise, making you roll your eyes half-heartedly. He goes back to his normal shade in a minute, no longer ridiculously red like a cartoon character. “What’s it about?”

You ponder his question silently, missing the way Jungkook takes this moment to glance at you. When you look up again, he’s already averting his gaze.

What is it about? That’s a question that you yourself have never really considered. It’s about everything and it’s about nothing. It’s love, it’s loss, it’s the infinite in-between. You give Seokjin an answer that won’t satisfy him, but it’s the truth.

“I haven’t figured it out yet. I’ll let you know when I do.”

He tuts at you, like he was expecting the obscurity from you anyway. “You’re really not beating the CIA allegations,” he says.

You flip him the bird, which only compels him to stick out his tongue and make a face at you. Then, he diverts his attention to the person who hasn’t contributed anything this whole time.

“JK, why are you so quiet today? We’re not gonna eat you.”

Jungkook mutters something to Seokjin that you don’t quite catch because the words come out of his mouth like an inarticulate mess, which is so unlike him. He sounds jumpy, like he’s too nervous to speak in front of you. Seokjin’s eyes land on you again as he mouths a confused What?

You just shrug, and Seokjin has to take Jungkook’s weird response as him having an off day. The man checks his phone, lets out a quiet whine, then addresses the both of you. “I have a shoot this afternoon so you two will have to hold down the fort, by the way.”

You come back from your solo lunch date to an empty studio.

Well, almost empty. There’s something new that wasn’t there before.

Another chai latte waiting for you equates to another apology hoping to be acknowledged. The paper cup is still hot when your hand reaches out to touch it. You sink into your chair with a sigh. You could laugh at yourself for feeling so nostalgic at the sight of a beverage in the middle of a workday.

Jungkook walks in about 15 minutes later, and the air turns suffocating at his arrival. He feels it too, you know he does.

You chew on your bottom lip until it starts to hurt, bite down on it until it almost bleeds.

“Jungkook,” you say, catching his attention. It looks like he didn’t expect you to initiate any conversation. It’s not like you want to, but you have to. You keep having to do this, because he just wouldn’t listen. “Stop buying me drinks.”

It translates to: Stop saying sorry. Stop trying to make things right. Stop doing things you think would make me happy. Stop making me have the same argument with you over and over again.

“Because you wouldn’t hear me out,” he says, and proceeds to repeat the one thing that you’re sick of hearing from him. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing,” you verbalize it. “If it’s not about work, I don’t think it’s necessary for me to hear it, Jungkook. I don’t want to hear it.”

“You do need to hear it. Because I can’t function properly until you know how sorry I am.”

“Well, that sounds like a you problem.”

“Y/N.”

“What?”

“Hear me out,” he says, sounding a little firmer now but you still catch the crack in his voice. “Please.”

Jungkook must take the way you hesitate to shut down him as reluctant permission for him to keep going, because he stands up and moves to a spot closer to you. Not close enough that he could reach out and touch you, but enough for you to see the tiny mole under his bottom lip and how it quivers when he looks at you.

Fuck. You’re letting him win again.

“Okay, fine. Talk then. I’m listening. You’re sorry, right? You keep saying you’re sorry for everything, but what exactly is everything? What are you even sorry about? Are you sorry about annoying me right now, or are you sorry about being a prick the other day, or are you sorry about leaving me five years ago? When did you become this pathetic, Jungkook?”

“W–what?”

“When did you become so pathetic?” you repeat. “If you had to come back, couldn’t you come back as someone better? Someone who’s sure of himself and has a good life, not this… person who has to grovel at my feet for forgiveness. Even when you were at your lowest, you weren’t like this. I don’t even know who this Jungkook is. What happened to you?”

If you think that you saw him at his lowest, then you’re wrong. He didn’t hit rock bottom until he’d left you and had to live with what he chose to do.

“You’re right. I am pathetic,” Jungkook agrees, dropping his gaze to the floor like he’s ashamed. “But fuck, I’m trying to be worthy of you.”

It’s a truth that he doesn’t want to face, doesn’t want to admit how very real it is until you’ve just said it and it fucking guts him. He knows his friends pity him sometimes, even if they don’t want to view him as someone to be pitied. No matter how much of a front he puts up, he knows that Jimin and Taehyung see right through him. They won’t say it to his face, and for that Jungkook has gotten away with avoiding this fact for so long. But to hear it from you, to watch you spell it out for him, it hurts.

He wants to mention Yoongi, but he doesn’t know how to phrase it in a way that wouldn’t immediately aggravate you. After all, bringing up Yoongi is what got him into this mess, isn’t it?

Regardless, he wants to ask you a question that he already knows the answer to. What does Yoongi have that he doesn’t? The answer is: A lot of things. Yoongi has a lot of things that Jungkook doesn’t, one of them being the self-assurance to not run away when it comes to you and what you deserve.

He wants to ask, but he doesn’t, because he’s scared it might drive you right into Yoongi’s arms and Jungkook can’t compete with a man like that.

He can barely keep up even with just himself in the running.

There’s a big question mark that pops up in your head, along with a slight sting in your eyes that you blink away. You’ve never seen Jungkook like this before. This whole time, was it not only you who was miserable?

He looks so small that it breaks your heart. For once, you aren’t sad for yourself but you’re sad for him. It never occurred to you that he could’ve been lonely too, having to keep all of this inside because you know he didn’t share it with anyone else. You catch a glimpse of him again, like you did when you were making ramen together in your kitchen while a storm was raging outside. In a lot of ways, Jungkook is still that kid stuck in an adult’s body, lost and scared and loved you. It feels like you could’ve seen him in the same ocean while you were just trying to keep your head above water.

The sight of him, so vulnerable and astray, placates you. Your resolve crumbles, but not like it was ever that strong to begin with. You suppose you could see why he was being a jerk to you. Even though it doesn’t justify what he said, you understand just a little bit where he was coming from. You find yourself forgiving him for some of it. It’s part of letting things go, right?

But no matter how much you want to reach out and comfort him, you know you shouldn’t. What are you supposed to do in a situation like this? You’re confused and it feels like you two have been going around in a circle, looking for a solution that doesn’t seem to exist.

Coexisting doesn’t work. Telling him to leave things alone doesn’t work. What else can you do?

Why do you have to resolve a problem that isn’t even yours? Jungkook says he’s trying, but his efforts keep making your life harder and harder. You practically blew up in his face, then apologized for being harsh even though you were fully aware that you had nothing to be sorry for. You called him a hypocrite and now you’re ready to cave just because he’s on the verge of shedding a few tears. This constant back and forth between your anger and your reluctance to see that anger through is possibly the thing that’s hindering you.

You can’t – and shouldn’t – accommodate him anymore. You have to put your foot down, no matter how difficult it is with the lingering ghost of your past love.

Because you’re always weak when it comes to Jungkook.

Because you’re still holding onto something.

Because Jungkook will always be the first person that you have ever loved, and those four years meant a lot to you even if they didn’t to him. Maybe it’s even fair to say that you might never truly get over it, and that doesn’t have to be such a terrible thing. Maybe he was never the person you thought he was, or maybe you never meant as much to him as he did to you. Somehow, that’s okay. It’s manageable because it’s routine at this point. You’ve internalized it. The years have taught you that sometimes, things get shitty just because they can and you just have to deal with it.

The intrinsic pain of the human experience. C’est la vie.

What a world this is.

Is it bad that you’re thinking about Yoongi in a moment like this?

Yoongi could be your future, if you’d let him.

You should let him. Maybe this is your answer right here.

“Jungkook, let’s stop.” He looks at you with crestfallen eyes, but you have to keep going. The only way out is through. “Let’s stop. You want me to listen to you, but you haven’t been listening to me. I don’t have the strength to keep this up anymore, and I have told you that repeatedly but you wouldn’t listen. Jungkook, move on.”

You pretend not to notice how his lip trembles even more. “What if I don’t want to move on?”

This feels like a conversation that should’ve happened ages ago. Five years ago, you should’ve screamed at him, cried with him, held each other as you both fell apart. He stripped you of that right and gave you no say at all.

“You’re being awfully selfish,” you tell him, but in your head, you’re already thinking about what his words actually mean.

“Have you completely written me off then? Is there nothing at all that I can do? Because I would do anything if you asked. You know that.”

Your throat is so dry that it feels like you’re swallowing sand. You dig everything back up again until you find the memory of that day hidden at the very bottom.

It’s terrible. He’s making you relive it again.

“I remember calling for you and you didn’t even look back,” you say, but your voice breaks toward the end. “I can’t trust you anymore.”

Jungkook just stares at you then, and for the longest time, neither of you say anything. This is the first time that you two have addressed the problem, properly addressed it instead of half-heartedly sweeping it under the rug like you tried to do.

You breathe in, he breathes out. You hate the way you feel, and you resent the way he looks like he’s breaking down just as badly. There are tears in those eyes, tears that Jungkook doesn’t let spill because he defiantly wipes them away with the back of his hand after a moment.

When he speaks next, you want the world to end.

“Then I’ll earn your trust back. I’ll do whatever it takes. I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you. I will.”

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babiebom · 3 months

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apologies for my absence- holiday periods are tiring lmao how were they for you? unfortunately we have yet to watch the fnaf movie, as our group is one that is exceedingly difficult to make plans around because we're all busy 💀 but then there's the one guy who doesn't want to leave his house lmao luckily, iv'e been pretty good at staying away from spoilers, so i've got that going for me. on the other hand, i'm planning to go see Trolls 3, and my mother and sister recently went to see the new Wonka movie. Though from what i've heard from a friend, Wonka's no good :// Yeahhh, if i actually commit to the mod, i'd have to learn pixel art and reteach myself code and programming 😭... i used to be somewhat decent at it. oooo yes i love a good choose your own adventure! they're so much fun and i've actually coded 1 of my own :,) it was through Visual Basics though, so the formatting was a bit weird for me lmao if you're going for a visual novel type of look and playability, I'd probably recommend Unity or itch.io? in my experience, Unity is probably easier to use.. theres another website/app i used but i can't recall the name sadly :( if i do i'll get back to you though! i don't have that much of a detailed request this time, but perhaps some fluff and love languages between rasmodius and the reader? or like hcs of rasmodius's evolving interest/thoughts arund the reader before finally getting together? i'd perhaps request nsfw/smut stuff too but tbh i just don't have any ideas 💛 tysmm :D -🔮

A/N: I’m glad you’re okay!! Honestly I’ve been sick these past couple of weeks (I caught pneumonia and had it for a month before going to the hospital. I thought it was a cold oopsies) I haven’t watched anything new recently but I am watching the third season of singles inferno with some friends. And I guess until I can figure out how to make a visual novel I have to write the fic out lmao sucks for me because I think a game would be better but oh well. What can I do? And like always I’ll try to do both!! Check back for the second one!!

Tw: cursing, slight nsfw but no full on smut. Let me know if there’s something I missed!!

Wc: I have no idea! But these are headcanons so 10+ is the goal!!

Sdv Masterlist

Okay so there are five main types of love languages.

Physical touch, Words of Affirmation, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Quality Time.

I would also like anyone reading this to remember that these love languages are how you want to be loved/receive love not how you show love to others.

I do think that Rasmodius is very connected to himself

And by that I mean I think he knows himself very well, or at least he thinks he knows himself very well.

And for a long time I think he probably thought that Quality Time and Physical Touch were his main two love languages.

I mean idk if it’s canon but in my opinion I do think he cheated on the witch with Caroline

And I’m not gonna go into it here because this isn’t about them, but I think it might’ve had to do with that and his own struggles with temptations.

And I also think gift giving is canon for literally every single character in stardew because that’s the main way to befriend someone.

But I think that after marrying you/beginning to date you he realizes that his actual love language is words of affirmation.

While Physical touch and quality time are still very important to him, being with you makes him see that he really does like being praised.

Like whenever you say that he has done something well, or that you like something he has done his heart flutters as if he were a teenager again.

Especially when it comes to his magic

Like I feel like the townspeople aren’t really fond of him

And they never thank him for the things that he does whenever they actually need him for stuff

Like the haunted maze

Like they’re just talking about how weird he is and how he got it done

But they never stop and say anything that’s positive like WTF

So I think he would appreciate whenever you thank him or praise him and it would go straight to his head (which one idk 👀)

With quality time I feel like you get a lot of it after he moves to the farm

Like unless he’s working in his tower, or you’re off somewhere like in the mines

That you’re like together even if it’s spent in silence

And he loves that

Like he was super lonely before even if he doesn’t want to admit it

So just being in the same room as you counts as quality time for him.

And if you’re doing an activity that’s particularly domestic

He’s in heaven like he doesn’t wanna make it a big deal

But baking and helping you around the farm makes his heart soar.

I think in terms of how he shows love i think he would show it in acts of service and gift giving

Like oh you don’t feel well?

Don’t bother going to the clinic he’s just going to create a potion that stops you from getting sick

You’re afab and you’re having bad cramps during your period?

Consider them gone

Look at this thing he got for you

And while yeah this might seem like either a lot of insincere

In his mind and heart this is how he shows that he appreciates you and wants you to live a good and easy life.

If he can make things easier and less stressful for you

That’s exactly what he’s going to do

He loves you and while he loves receiving attention and love he’s kinda crap at giving it in the same way because he just doesn’t really know how

So this is how he does

He’s VERY romantic sometimes and shows it through gifts and services.

Very cute and a good significant other when you get past his rough exterior.

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talictries · 4 months

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THE HONEY OF HUMANITY - FIC TRAILER

GO READ THE FIRST CHAPTER HERE

It's a death that after eight long years brings them all back together.

It's been almost a decade since the self-proclaimed 'Bellgate Eight' have all seen one another. It just happens that the funeral of their shared past Literature teacher, George's life role model, is what brings them back together, for the better or the worse.

Alternatively; an exploration of justice and injustice, love and hate, fire and water, and perhaps most fittingly the novel they studied together in their senior year at the prestigious Bellgate Academy; Crime and Punishment.

Double Alternatively; The Dark Academia Murder Mystery F1 Fanfic that the world never knew it needed. (Especially in these trying times when there is still two entire months before we see cars on track again.

so,,,, mayhaps not what you expected from me (a wannabe video editor?? who am i??) but i was talking to @cak3art and they made a literal crime board of the suspects which was so funny considering they had the 'groundbreaking idea' before a few scenes later the literal characters were making one 💀.

but yeah? this is... something?? i'm pretty ass at editing still, but honestly this fic is my favourite thing I've written and a 2024 goal of mine is to try do more editing so i pulled an all-nighter and made this.

if you do read this post and decide to give it a read, then thank you!! reblogs appreciated <333 and hope everyone is well <333

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missmonsters2 · 1 year

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However your page is 18 + so let's be real nobody under 18 should be reading your works and the whole point of a reader insert is to INSERT yourself in readers.

It's just rlly not sitting right for me.💀 I would say try to avoid a Wednesday x reader especially if you are over 18 and with no sort of clarification.😭

Love your work though<3

I understand your concerns are valid and also appreciate that you're trying to check. But I also feel like you're trying to insinuate a very predatory image of me when I've been clear on my blog about my stance.

Please actually read my navigation post. Nowhere on my blog states that it's an 18+ blog only. I have 18+ work but as stated in my navigation post and multiple posts in my past that minors are to not DNI with those. But I don't only post 18+ work which is why I welcome minors to my blog and read those as long as they respect my boundaries (which they have been very good at doing).

You've opened this pandora box about reader inserts. Yes, the point of Y/N fics are that people can try to imagine themselves, but not everyone does that. Also reader fics cannot cater to every single reader. That why I believe or see reader as an OC as if it were a traditional book published.

I want to know(but not really because I don't want to keep debating this with you) if you bring this energy to the entire marvel fandom as well. I can't assume how old you are but I hope you also then have concerns about:

marvel high school AUs

sugaring AUs that typically bring problematic age gaps

Aged up marvel character fics, specifically peter parker

minor fics that feature sexual situations with peter parker or MJ

Natasha is 32 in Black Widow, are you concerned about 18 yo reading reader inserts about Natasha. Are you even old enough to be with Natasha in fics if you self-insert.

Same with Wanda. MCU has aged her up and she's about 30. But there are also sites that state she's supposed to be around 17-19 in AoU.

fics where reader is a child or a relative of your marvel character but in a diff fic, you're dating her?

Do you just not read fics then if you just don't 100% see yourself as the reader? If you see POC!reader or you're pretty sure reader is white or different sexuality!reader do you just say fuck it, I can't support that it isn't me.

Were you out there when people were writing 1D fics or TVD.

Are you out there saying stuff to people who write for stranger things like Steve, Robin, or Nancy?

Prior to marvel, I've never written any reader insert fics as I typically came from fandoms where they were character x character ships. You can see my transition from earlier fics where initially did it as character x ofc/reader. Personally, I would prefer to continue to write distinct OCs for these characters if I don't lean towards any character ships. But I'm trying to reach a wider demographic by doing x reader fics.

Obviously, there is wenclair and I love to see it and maybe as they explore their relationship in season 2, it'll become canon.

I don't have a romantic interest in wednesday by writing these fics as I'll be tagging it as wednesday x OC/Reader for people who lean whatever way. But I'm still going to write it because I like wednesday as a character and the OC/reader I'll write her with is another 16 year old obviously because why would there be an adult as a student in nevermore. The fic will literally be harmless fluff between two 16 year olds.

#mm: answered #anon #please know this is the end of the discussion and I will not be posting more asks about it #mm.readerinsertdiscourse

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manofmanymons · 25 days

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Everyone knows I'm deranged about Digimon Survive, but here are some unhinged things I did while in other fandoms!

MHA:

Was a leader on the kiribaku amino.

Amino.

Let that sink in just a little longer.

Participated in a secret santa event in said amino by compiling the most requested prompts by all the members and writing for all of them. Why did I do that to myself!

Hetalia because yes I was that cringe:

Opened a short story collection to requests, forgot to specify things I didn't want to write, didn't want to turn down my first request, and wrote abo smut. I think I was like 15 at that point ksjskd I cannot express strongly enough how much I do now and did then hate abo

...changed my pfp to a sfw screenshot from an nsfw comic because I thought it was funny that no one could call me on it without admitting they recognized where it was from💀 yeah I was...one of those kids 💀💀💀💀

Kingdom Hearts:

Wrote 200k words worth of fic for that fandom. For reference I've only done ~40k for Survive.

Most of it was for a rarepair that never met in canon because something is very wrong with me! A lot of rest was for pairs that have met but are still also rare because again something is very wrong with me!

I reread. The entirety of Roxas's diary from 358. Just so I could emulate his writing style for a fic.

Actually ran a gimmick account for a while! I haven't done that before or since!

Temporarily replaced my entire personality with really loving Vanitas. Kinda like how I am with Kaito rn but somehow even worse. Somethin about a fucked up black and red color scheme boy 😔😔😔

Talked about it SO MUCH irl that two of my friends literally stopped wanting to talk to me anymore cuz they were so sick of hearing about Roxas

Genshin Impact:

Wrote a joke fic for a ship I hate but accidentally took it too seriously to the point where it was not clear that it was a joke and it became my second most popular fic not on that account but of all time and I'm STILL angry about it

Wrote one of the first 5 fics to ever exist for, you guessed it, another rarepair

I...see this isn't about my behavior in the fandom necessarily but it's kinda embarrassing how feral I went over Thoma. Like,,,spent money on the game for the first time just to get a weapon that matched his outfit, built a whole ass shrine to him in my in-game home, GOT MY EARS PIERCED DO YOU KNOW HOW EMBARRASSING THAT IS, listened to nothing but his theme song for a very very very long time, bought entirely too much merch of him/him and Ayaka, refused to take him off my team no matter how useless pyro was even in floor 12 spiral abyss, and perhaps most embarrassing of all...read x reader fanfic for the first time since I was literally 11 💀 That man DID something to me y'all

Sasaki to Miyano:

Knew the manga so well that I could tell you exactly what chapter any given scene was from

Sent a different picture of Sasaki to my irls' gc every day for over 200 days

Got better at baking and learning recipes for friends as a way of expressing affection because that's what Sasaki does

#i only know how to like things in the most obsessive deranged way possible :)

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doctorweebmd · 2 months

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I never knew what to say about zsg because, well, there are a lot of aspects about it that don't align with my usual taste, despite its objective high quality. I mean, I'm a sfw fan 😂 That said, I'm always in awe that with your busy job, you continue to feed us so well. I'm busy too and only going yo get busier, so it's an inspiration, as longfics are what I prefer to write as well (though it doesn't come nearly as naturally, lol). And, you're right, zsg deserves to hear the love and admiration I have for it, so here goes.

To start with, the fic definitely has residence in my head, despite reading it nearly a year ago. There are scenes I still think about. I was talking about then with a friend just a week ago. Since I don't have time to read fic these days (cries), the most I can do is go back to old fics and reread my favorite scenes, and I do that with zsg, because there are such high quality, top tier moments. The "you're looking at me" "I never stopped" ??? That might be the pinnacle bkdk. I can't believe I've never seen that before in a bkdk fic? Or if it was there, it didn't hit as hard.

I know you're not so into the falling action part of a fic, but I loved the last bits with bkdk. When Baku realizes Deku's staying? Those moments they have of figuring things out are so good. And the provisional exam being inspired by Kamino was great. Really clever and a nice homage. And, of course, very nice that Deku could be a hero again.

Also, the Shinsou content is perf. I always love a side character having a big part in a ship fic and that shinbaku relationship is exactly why. (Similarly, I loved All Might and Aizawa helping Baku out.) That flashback scene where Deku calls Baku Kacchan? So good. And so smart as a flashback, because it would have been too much in the actual timeline, but where you fit it in the plot was really really clever. I also generally love a flashback--unpopular opinion, but I do.

Those were some of my biggest highlights! I hope my little disclaimer at the top isn't totally assholish 💀 I think you're just great and really admire your openness and the things you try to tackle in fics and your incredible output. I hope you're doing well <3

ahhh Anjum thank you so much for sending this!!! AHHH i'm sorry i complain on here so often i was so embarrassed i deleted the post lmao

gosh yeah especially when you read sfw stuff in general! i have this habit of writing REALLY detailed and explicit sex scenes 😳 what made you read it, in that case? (obviously you dont have to answer!)

god. every time i think about their devotion to one another i want to combust into flames. think for much LESS we had to work with when we were writing a few years ago?! the way horikoshi has developed katsuki into this passionate, level-headed, absolutely hopelessly committed to Izuku - literally never saw it coming. these two deserve peace in the end. they deserve to live a life on their own terms. they just DESERVE TO BE HAPPYYYY

urgh its Izuku's DREAM and of course horikoshi is setting him up to lose one for all, i think thats been his intention from the beginning, but his life is only starting!!! he's only 15!!! you're telling me he's going to risk his life and lose the only thing he's ever wanted?! i wonder if horikoshi used all might in his big-old mecha suit as a hint that deku would still be a hero, just using assist devices. at least i hope. this kid deserves a chance. (i dont know if you're caught up on the manga?? i'm kind of ranting lol)

adjfakldjflk;asjdlfjasdfj ANYWAY WHEN I TELL YOU THIS MADE MY DAYYYYYY adsjfaldjfkl argh you just made me so happy especially because its been a long time and i forget parts about it but TO HEAR THAT EVEN THE PARTS THAT FELT LIKE A STRUGGLE WERE STILL ENJOYABLE?! urgh i appreciate you so much thank you for taking time out of your day to reassure a complainy weirdo like me

#🥺🥺🥺#i love you and appreciate you so much #i still remember izuku leaving U.A and that panel of him looking exhausted and saying 'a giant villain' was what inspired zsg #and just the thoughts of what katsuki would do. if izuku went full vigilante and disappeared #now we have SO MUCH. we have the apology. the izuku. the catching him in the rain. the literally thinking about him before he dies.#the instantly meeting eyes as he resurrects like some angel. them saving all might together.#god. i love they.

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kalpasio · 1 year

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Yo hey!

New reader here, but I was confused as to why you described kalpas in your fic, “The Chef in the Shitty Kitchen”, as OOC? I might be biased because I love exploring how other sides of characters surface in different scenarios. I feel like it’s our job as a fandom to expand on our blorbos! I’d just like to know your thought process (that was actually my favorite fic, I love domestic kalpas. Imo it’s much better to be a carb addict than an alcoholic—)

On the other hand, thank you for single-handedly keeping the kalpas fan club afloat. I scraped Danbooru for some kalpas content, but in 60% of the pictures he was like 6 pixels in the background.

Moving from genshin to honkai where there’s a severe lack of content almost made me implode, so I’ll try my best to help out! Although I’ve only written two fics, and both times my wrists hurt so bad I had to stop.

They were only 1k words. 💀

Fellow kalpas lovers, rise up!!! (Sorry for being wordy but I didn’t want to clog up your ask box, you’re probably already in really high demand 😭 )

I think I say he's ooc in all my fics because I'm nervous lmao but that one especially I wrote before the golden courtyard anime came out and it was like entirely made up from brainrot? so I was like this is NOT real kalpas, and I can say it but if someone else said he was ooc I would definitely start arguing lol

I feel like flame chaser kalpas 1) has seen Some Shit, 2) been through Some Shit, and 3) does not have access to a kitchen so his personality is very different than it would have been if honkai hadn't destroyed his life. Golden courtyard kalpas is what I guess he would be like if he had actually gotten a chance to live his life I guess? idk he deserves a little happiness ya know? also domestic kalpas is a bean, change my mind

tbh moving from genshin to honkai and seeing so little content was part of what made me start writing for kalpas? I was like "oh Thoma has no content" because he only had like a couple hundred fics and then kalpas had like. two. and I was SO Mad I swear even if I write for something else if I ever get a chance holy shit I will always come back to Kalpas

my wrist HATES me which is problematic so I completely understand lol I usually end up taking breaks and writing things down on notes so I can come back and elaborate when my hand isn't about to fall off? still makes me sad tho. also 1k words is 1k more words than we had before!!! if you feel comfortable with it I'd love to read your works 🧡!!

asks are unfortunately all I've been doing lately because of school so you don't have to worry about sending any in! tbh my request list is so long because I have some that are literally over 100 days old and I am just dying rn 💀

#hiiiiiiii 👋👋👋#extremely long response #my b lol #you have no idea how happy i am to meet another writer!#like the community is small but i am bad at interacting lol #so I'm glad there's someone else writing and I'm like super honored that you reached out to me even though ive been dead for months 😭😭#I'm gonna get a fic out this week if it kills me #because not writing S U C K S

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fyreflys · 8 months

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Hi 👋😊 I just wanna say I read your brilliant catching fire AU last night and I was just too tired and out of it to leave a comment coz I found it at like 3am and read till 6am💀 I hope that already tell you how absolutely OBSESSED I am with the concepts and your writing is so beautiful and I just love katniss and peeta and GODDAMN do you know how long I've been looking for a fic like this?? SINCE THE BOOK WAS FIRST PUBLISHED. So I am BEYOND hyped and I am literally on my knees I'm telling you I worship the ground you walk on. Did I say brilliant? EPIC. ICONIC. INCREDIBLE. Everything I ever wanted 😭😭🥺🥺🥺 I wish I'd had the energy to leave a throughout comment on every chapter but I was already way too out of it at that point. Didn't matter that I had an important meeting at 8 and literally slept 3 hours or smth because as soon as I read the first paragraph I knew I would be able to put it down until I'd read every already published chapter.... Anyway. Thank you for writing and sharing!!! And linking your tumblr so I could geek out here 🫡

OMG YOU ARE SO KIND

this is such a sweet message to find in my notifs. I too have been looking for a fic like this forever, hence why I decided to start writing it 😅. Also you are crazy for only sleeping what was probably less than two hours before an important meeting but also I’d do the same thing so I can’t judge at all.

Comments like this really fuel me to keep writing so I really appreciate the love & I hope you enjoy what I have set up for the next chapters. I haven’t gotten many opportunities to write lately but this comment by itself has me excited to start writing again 💜💜💜 so THANK YOU for reading and leaving me such a lovely message

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a-swiss-and-a-spaniard · 6 months

Text

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for thinking of me @yoellglia ! I had fun reading your answers and even more so trying to answer myself :)

1. How many works do you have on A03?

Jeez, should I consider both of my accounts? Let's do it, why not.

I have 12 fics in total. 7 for Tennis RPF and 5 for the DC Universe.

2. What's your total A03 word count?

37,211 words combined. Ngl, I thought it would be less than that as there are only two multi-chaptered fics and the rest are one-shots. Hopefully, I'll add some more words in the upcoming months :)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I only write Tennis RPF. I've been toying with a few ideas for the Good Omens fandom, but I haven't opened a new doc yet. And I used to write for the DC Universe, but I haven't done that in ages.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

(I’m gonna keep this Tennis RPF only bc this blog is tennis themed)

Waking in the Night Light: Fedal share their first kiss in a parking lot.

A New Target: Fedal have sex in the locker room.

Moonlight in Paris: Rafa goes to Roger's hotel room.

Strawberry & Dulce de Leche: Roger and Rafa get ice cream.

Somewhere or Other: Fedal phone call.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes yes yes! At least I try to. Although more often than not I get the notification, reply in my head, then forget to actually write back, and I'm too embarrassed to answer if more than a week has gone by… so apologies for that. That doesn't mean I don’t appreciate every single comment I have ever gotten, they always make my day in fact.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Mmh… perhaps Moonlight in Paris. It's not angst per se but it does have an overall sense of uncertainty.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Strawberry & Dulce de Leche, definitely. Rafa's joy at the possibility of Roger going to his birthday party is everything.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, thankfully. I’m glad I haven't unlocked that side of fandom yet.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, but I consider myself a newbie at it (smut writers, pls teach me your ways).

Generally speaking, I prefer it when smut has a little plot. It doesn't have to be anything complicated or serious, I just need a bit of a story behind what's happening for it to feel more organic. I also like it when the focus is on the emotional aspect of it, though descriptive can be nice as well. And I don't mind wordy smut as longs as it doesn't mess with the flow.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope, and I'm not a big fan of those tbh

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Story time! Yes 💀 Although it wasn't the whole thing, just a fragment. The fic in question was None but the Lonely Heart for the DCEU. And I only found out bc a lovely person left a comment on my fic, letting me know what had happened and the link to the other fic. I checked and the writer had indeed literally copied and pasted one of my scenes, they'd just changed the names of the characters. So I reached out to the AO3 team and they took care of everything.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. Stef and I had an idea for a Fedal fic, but who knows if we'll ever get to actually write it lol

14. What's your all time favourite ship?

I don't think I have one, really. I would say my main ones/the ones I keep coming back to are Fedal (Roger Federer/Rafael Nadal) and Superbat (Superman/Batman). Though right now I've been reading almost exclusively Ineffable Husbands (Aziraphale/Crowley), so it mostly depends on my hyperfixation at the time

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oof, that might be a Superbat (long) fic set post BvS, where resurrected Clark has lost his powers (and the sun seems to actually make him sick now), so Bruce helps him to get back on his feet and of course they fall in love in the process. I have the whole thing outlined, sheets of dialogues and a couple of scenes already fleshed out, but I took a break from the fandom bc it was draining me out. Idk, maybe one day I'll get back to it. I mean, never say never and all that, but it's looking highly improbable right now

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at setting the tone of scenes, be it fluffy, angsty, whatever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I tend to write in long, long sentences. Seriously, you should see my drafts, sometimes a whole paragraph can be a single sentence. I don't know if it's due to my Spanish hard-wired brain or what, but I’m working on breaking things up a bit more.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love it! But you need to make sure readers will still get the message through context, so I think it's best to stick to single words and/or common phrases. Unless, of course, you want to leave your character (and thus your readers) feeling confused.

I do it often when I’m writing Rafa and it's part of the reason I love writing him so much.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

DC Universe

20. Favourite fic you've written?

Tough question… can I say an unpublished one? I have this sort of introspection/character study of Domi, his struggles coming back on tour after the wrist injury and dealing with all the ups and downs. There's not a story to it per se, like I'm not trying to get him from A to B. It's just a dive into his mind, where it gets kinda dark real quick, and it's unlike what I usually go for in tennis fics (fluff), so I've been enjoying the challenge of getting out of my comfort zone there

#fic writing #tag game #about me

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esta-elavaris · 10 months

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ok new fic ask game bc why not!! 📚⏰ — i kinda have my own own question to tack onto these two though and that is if you read any fanfic or if you mainly focus on writing it, and so if you do read any do you have any that you would recommend for some reason or another?

📚 Do you read your own fic?

CTW is the only one I can read for actual enjoyment/out of pride 🥲 I remain stupidly proud of that one. I think LBL was my first properly good fic, but I improved a lot as I was writing it so I wince throughout it a lot, especially with the early chapters, if I have to refer back to it for whatever reason. I've also never looked back at HTWA until literally just last night, because I'm doing a read-through to make sure I can land the thing in a decent way over the next few months, but even that one has me cringeing a lot. Usually if I'm reading something of my own, it's so I can remember what I've already done, especially if it's a fic I haven't touched in a long time 💀

⏰ Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?

Writing it, for sure. I used to read tonnes of it, easily outweighing the actual books I read, but at this point I have so many actual books I want to get through that I can't justify reading lots of fic unless I have bad fandom brainrot - like, deep hyperfixation style. The last one for that was the Ghost fandom, since the members of the band are characters rather than just normal musicians, so I don't feel weird reading about them. But nine times out of ten if I want to read I just go for a book.

That being said, it doesn't help that I make a point of completely avoiding reading pairings that I write (sometimes even entire fandoms, depending on whether I want to keep writing different pairings in the same fandom later on) because I don't want to be accidentally influenced by another writer to a point where I'd unwittingly copy their ideas without realising it. So the more fic I write, the less I can really read. It's definitely a bit of a paranoid move but it offers peace of mind lolol.

Buuut I did read this Haldir/LOTR fic this year - it's very, very good and it's still being updated! I'm going to reread it from the beginning soon for sure.

Thank you for consistently giving me an excuse to whitter on about writing I do very much appreciate it 💜

#asks

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storiesbyrhi · 1 year

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girl i just wanna say that i’m so happy you’re writing a bones and all au like it’s literally my fav movie (i already know what happens in the book i just haven’t read it yet) and i remember right when you posted about you beginning to write it i was thinking of how badly i wanted someone to write it just a couple hours before 💀but ik that a lot of people feel uncomfortable with cannibalism in media, which yk is understandable, but it’s fiction and it’s metaphorical and romantic in this case😭like also this is just a quick little rant having to do with the novel and film itself but i saw a lot of people being like “ew that’s not love” or saying it’s romanticizing cannibalism and it just reminds me of how people are really not looking more deeply into things like this cause b&a is SOOO much more than just cannibalism. it shows poverty, loneliness, queerness, feminism and showing how rare it is to really relate and understand another completely BUT ANYWAY JFJJDJD just ty i’m obsessed oh also i just want to know if you prefer the film or the book more and why? like what are the differences you liked?

Hellooooo. Sorry for the late reply; I've had gastro and it has been a bad. time.

I love cannibalism as a romantic metaphor. Ooofff. Love me so completely and insanely that you need to eat me up and have me inside you. That's the good shit.

Yes, Bones and All has so many interesting viewpoints on the things you listed. It's not a perfect book or film, not by a long shot, but it is something a bit more unique than a lot of the YA offerings we've had recently. And, I'm always gonna be a sucker for horror romance.

Honestly, I still haven't decided if I prefer the film or book ending. As I write this fic I'm finding it a great tool to analyse the two texts more in-depth. I pick and chose what to take from them in terms of both what fits with Eddie's character best, but what I feel like makes a good story. How about when I finish the fic and the final chapters are published, you ask me again about which ending I like best? I'll probably have a set answer by then.

Thank you for reading the fic and for writing! I am so stoked you're as excited about it all as I am lmao. xo Rhi

#Rhi Talks

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stayxlix · 11 months

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I've been saving off the deep end to read once I had a break between exams

BRUH THAT STORYYYYYYY!! Pls don't mind my analysis and play-by-play reactions😩

You're writing style is so good I love the descriptions and how you manage to make everything so vivid. District 7's description was so on point, I really like how I could visualize it.... The tavern, the roads, the forests, the people...

"Cold rings on his fingers pressed into bare skin" goodbye I'd fold so fast✋✋✋ like yes he's a stranger but BRO

"He hesitantly brought his thumb up to run it over your bottom lip," I- 😀

I'm barely 2k into this story and already feeling a scream creeping up my throat.

"Without another word or giving you the chance to respond, he turned to go." Now excuse me dear sir✋ Get your outer district ass back here👹

How are you gonna make out w/ me then just dip💀 survival ig but STILL

"....so many eyes on you, permanently associating you with your father and his regime," SO WELL WRITTEN UGH CHEF'S KISS

I love the mc (main character) so much. They've won my favour so fast, uncharacteristically so. This is the kind of 'y/n' that we need to see more often! The change, the hero.

"A life with him certainly wouldn't involve tight corsets and suffocating lies." How are we so sure about the latter sweetie👀

But mc is better than me I'd probably be going there (district 7) every night in hopes of seeing him. But the chances are low considering he was on the run😔 Rational thinking ftw I guess?

"He had probably already forgotten about you." NAURRR😭 (I could never be this mature... To admit this to myself in such a situation? Nope)

"...followed by the glass walls of the hall shattering to pieces around you." Ok THIS PART IN THE STORY✋ Loveeee the build up of tension. I feel like I'm there omg.

"six..seven..maybe eight figures dressed in all black with bandana...." OOOH👀👀👀 !!! STRAY KISS WOO

"a group of your father's guards run up and make contact with the boys, tossing a couple of them their own guns."😨 HUH? OMG WHAT???? Betrayal of the century purrr😻

"The boy who had kissed you in the alley two weeks ago." GOODBYE CBFNFNFBFV

I should've seen this coming butt I'm FLABBERGASTED

Let's goooo😩😩✋ Also thank you for making it brown hair Felix, like THANK YOU😋 (btw this ask is so long sorryyyy)

"You swear you saw the faintest hint of a smirk... " OFFICIALLY HOLLERING RN AARGHHHH

No bc I hope he kidnaps mc😘 and Jisoo ofc😻 let's go live in the trenches 😋

NO the guards ruined it😒 Can they duck off istg

"Were you protecting him? " Dgfhgkhmkdxnh

"You mouthed "go" and if you had blinked you would have missed the nod he gave you in return." I need a minute🤒 A longgggg minute to process this

"Why would the boys risk their lives to send a message? " THIS IS SUCH AN ACCURATE REPRESENTATION OF SKZ HELP

Like that's LITERALLY THEM

"As far as he knew, you were just like the rest of them." Bro this story is INTENSE

On that more I will be leaving for now, I need to eat and process this story before continuing it is so bloody good

Again, I'm so sorry for how long this is

omg so i just want to start by saying that from the bottom of my heart i am so touched by this. i seriously think i re-read it at least 7 times and i can’t even begin to express how much it means to me that you took the time out of your day to go through and immerse yourself into the story the way you did.😭💕 the play-by-play literally had me giggling to myself like a CHILD lmao you’re actually so funny like i wish i could hire you to narrate my life.😂

this is the first/only fic i’ve ever written and you complimented some of the parts i was most insecure about without even knowing it and i just. thank you.🥹💕 like your comment about the mc i could actually cry. and it’s always nice to find another dark hair felix stan because as much as i love the blonde (and i really do) i just couldn’t imagine him any other way here.

please don’t ever feel the need to apologize for how much you write this is what i LIVE for and it gives me so much motivation to continue the story. you could write an entire novel and i would happily sit down and read every single word.😊 i hope you got something good to eat (and that your exams went well) and i hope the rest of your day/night has been just as good as this made mine.💕💕💕

#alex answers asks♡#otde.

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taegularities · 1 year

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RID 🫶🫶

how are you? hows work? i hope youre enjoying it!

i just finished up all my finals and im finally back home for the summer, like i quite literally got home an hour ago - it is very bittersweet bc i absolutely love college ‼️

i also kinda met someone who was SO similar to me, it was scary (like same sense of humor, same values, same religious povs)🤭 but we both moved back home for the summer and idk i dont think it'll go anywhere, but i do like him quite a bit ‼️ our first date ended up being 5 hours long, we literally just talked about everything and anything 🙏 i hope it goes somewhere, i felt like i should update you since you were present during my tinder phase 💀

AHHH I READ THE NEW C&F PART!!!! oh my god rid. IT WAS SO GOOD ‼️ how are you ever nervous releasing such good fics 🤨 i was so enthralled, i read it within an hr 🤭 the smut.. jungkook being head over heels in love... the PLOT TWIST 🫡 im in love with them, it actually felt like a reward after these last two draining weeks ❤️

i hope you are having an amazing day, please remember to take breaks 🫶

- wife from war anon 💂‍♀️

BABE HI !!! i'm okay, just a lil sick and very tired jfjsjsid i need to be better before work on monday.. which !! i've been enjoying so far! ty for asking 🥺

awh, i hope you have fun back home and then an even lovelier time when you return to college. but considering that little update 👀 i understand why you love college so much 👀 LMAO BABE THAT'S AMAZING ???? after that confusing ass tinder time, you definitely deserve some certainty and comfort. i'm so happy you've found someone who you can vibe with, and i truuuuly freaking hope it leads somewhere, too. i'll be the first one to cheer 🥺

ALSO YAY YOU READ C&F?? yeah, i was nervous af and now i'm just as nervous about the epilogue rip hsjsusue but so nice to hear you enjoyed it and that it was rewarding. jk is a simp fr :') and an hour is a short time for 30k+ hahaha i love you a lot bby :(( 🤍

#hope you've been all okay !!#miss u always #notes for rid 🌹#wife from war anon 💂🏼‍♀️#fic: candles & flames

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