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babiebom · 2 days
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Wowow rewatching criminal minds from the start I really dislike Haley(this is hitch’s wife right?)
Like I understand that she wants him home but DAMN I don’t even think she works?????? Like when he’s home he helps with the house and child care (so he’s obviously not a bad guy to be married to)
He’s gone all the time but he’s WORKING. It’s not like he’s cheating or leaving to leave. He’s saving LIVES like actually an irl hero. And you’re mad because his life goal is to save people??? Like damn you’re obviously living in a good house, and from this episode it looks like she’s cheating
So like stfu? Like DAMN I’m mad my super hot husband who loves me is good at his job like I would understand if she was worried about the danger but every time she’s mad it’s because he’s working?????
Like MAAM from what I see they don’t even have to put the kid in daycare bc she doesn’t work like be happy? Or like get your own job so you feel fulfilled? Idk like this isn’t a pick me thing it’s more like if your main problem is that your husband works too much and you’re alone in your big ass house then I think you’re not dealing with any problems. Like if them being in danger was her main concern I would understand but it’s not lmao
Or maybe it’s bc I prefer being alone and would be fine with this as long as he’s safe like ohhhh noooooo I have my big bed to myself and my baby loves me and my husband is good at his job and obviously not a cheater and he makes big bucks so we can afford this house oh noooooooooo
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babiebom · 2 days
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Howdy do! I just found your blog not too long ago and I already absolutely love your headcanons for everyone! (Esp my baby, Seb). I was wondering if you could possibly do like headcanons or a scenario of Mr. Qi finding out that y/n/the farmer is preggo with his kid? (assuming that they would already be married or together in some way). If not, then that's totally okay! I just think that he'd be a really good dad and hubby
A/N: HIII lmao the howdy lowkey triggered me(not in a bad way I promise I’m just southern) but yes it’s no problem at all!! Idk which you’d prefer of headcanons or a scenario so I’m going to combine them <3 hope you enjoy!!
Tw: some cursing, pregnancy, mentions of pregnancy troubles, I refer to him as Qi instead of Mr.Qi bc I think it would be strange to refer to your husband like that lmao. M
AFAB reader lmk if I should tag anything else!!
Bc/wc: 10/ I think around 400-500
Stardew Valley Masterlist
I think if you get pregnant it’s because you were purposefully trying to have a baby
Like dude is taking no chances he is not in his slutty era he likes being cool and mysterious and being a baby daddy to random kids is not that
I personally think that he wouldn’t jump for joy or anything
Like yes he’s excited and happy but I don’t think that’s him at all
That baby would actually be the most loved child because again I don’t think he’d just be making a baby if he wasn’t a hundred percent sure he wanted one.
Actually would spend so much time trying to make everything as comfortable as possible for you
Helps with all the decorating even if he has a few odd tastes
I think he knows a few tricks to be more comfortable during pregnancy and labor
Is absolutely already getting everything ready for labor even if you just find out that you’re pregnant
Again I think he is more excited than he shows. He’s just good at maintaining a clam exterior
After months of negative tests, your excitement and hope has dwindled. Like yeah, getting pregnant takes some time but it still hurt every single time you didn’t get what you want. But now, by the grace of whatever God there may be, you’re holding a positive test in your hand while three others sit on the counter in front of you. You haven’t even pulled your pants up because after the first test had come back positive you had sat back down on the toilet to take another test.
Everything you had been wanting is coming true, and while things could go wrong between now and nine months ahead of you, you still feel the excitement crawling its way into your body after being lost. You can’t help the squeals of excitement that leave your mouth as you struggle to breathe and dance around in happiness with your pants still at your ankles.
There was so much to do, so much to plan. Baby showers, getting a birth plan, your hospital bag, the nursery, working more so you have enough money to splurge, baby clothes, diapers, decorations, doctor’s appointments…there’s so much that you’re unable to keep the joy in.
And you still had to tell your husband. You wanted to have a cute little reveal for him, to let him know that the two of you had finally achieved the first part of your dreams, but the actual you knew that you would have no time really to plan, nor do you think he would be surprised. He somehow always had a way of knowing things you didn’t.
Without any predictability, Qi walks into your home, the only way you’re able to tell is the front door closing a bit loudly. Quickly you pull up your pants and gather the positive tests, shoving them all into the boxes hands shaking with your giddiness. “You’re home!” You run over and engulf your husband with a hug. He grasps you just as tightly and when you pull back he’s smirking as if he knows something you don’t. You have the same facial expression because this time it’s you who knows something he doesn’t.
“You’re rather excited aren’t you?” He asks, eyebrow quirking up in amusement.
“I am, you wanna know why?” You ask, unable to keep still. You bring the box’s in between you two, smiling at him. “Take a look.”
He pulls a pregnancy test out of a box and his smile never falters, and he doesn’t really seem surprised. You don’t let it upset you though, knowing that he feels exactly the same as you do. He presses a kiss to your head and returns the test to the box.
“Well,” he clasped his hands together, “we have a lot to do now don’t we?”
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babiebom · 6 days
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Ranking the relationships in my fics
A/N: I have so many requests right now and no time to do them and I’m kinda burnt out on the one I’m doing so here’s something easy for right now :) both platonic and romantic as long as it’s a main relationship also half of these Fics have been either deleted or never posted but might be in the future!! I will include links to those posted :)
Tw:some nsfw? Some cursing, some angst, mentions of murder and suicide mentions of abuse (physical mental verbal) lmk if I should tag anything else!!
Bc at least 4 for each pairing
Misc Masterlist
1) Denali x Naomi (Escape the Fog)
From a deleted fic that I am currently rewriting its a dead by daylight fic with two original main characters
The reason this is number one is because out of all of the relationships this is the one that is strictly platonic
Like yeah romantic relationships aren’t bad but
Out of all the relationships this one is the most demanding and pure
I mean not to spoil but Naomi is literally taken to the Entity’s realm and Denali is taken there simply because her need to find her friend is so strong!!!!
Like she doesn’t care that she’s being killed every single day
She’s just happy that she’s found her friend that went missing
And loves her friend so much that she’s willing to be permakilled to get her back home
2) Sebastian x Reader (When You Fall)
From When You Fall which is a Stardew Valley fanfiction
The least toxic out of the romantic relationships
And by least toxic I don’t think they’re toxic at all
Like even if there’s a little angst (there’s gonna be a little angst btw) they’re a strong couple
Actually makes each other better rather than making each other worse.
They love each other for who they are including all of their flaws and they would be number one if Denali and Naomi didn’t have a relationship that goes above and beyond.
Like what kind of person would help you through your depression?
A person that loves you that’s who.
Like 80 years from now the two will be old and grey and still acting as if they’re in the honeymoon phase
3) Eden x Eleventh Doctor (The Garden of Eden)
From an unpublished Doctor who fanfiction that I am in the process of writing
Here is where we’re getting into the ohhhh this relationship is kinda toxic really
And it’s a shame they’re number THREE on the list lmao what does that say about my writing?
They are constantly arguing (90 percent not in a serious way)
And Eden sort of sees the Doctor as a God due to how they met which puts him on a pedestal
BUT the relationship doesn’t start off romantic which I think is healthy for them
And they are both fiercely protective of one another due to how long she’s spent traveling with him
So while she does see him as a God it isn’t in a very obvious or serious way unless you can see inside of her head as she doesn’t treat him as such at all.
Also a very goofy relationship overall
4) Grace x Seth Clearwater (unnamed fic)
It’s an unwritten and unnamed Twilight Fic that I might post when I’m done with the whole thing lmao
The only reason they’re number four is that I think that him imprinting on her is taking away his choice
Like yes they would probably still end up together regardless of if he had the ability to imprint or not because they’re soulmates
But him having the trait does take away the ability to actually choose
Like it’s literally a one look and that’s it thing. It forces you to live someone platonically or not so he doesn’t have a say in the matter
BUT the two do genuinely love each other so so so much that after their angst is done they’re inseparable
Which again sorta toxic when it’s a codependent relationship but they actually RARELY argue
Seth is actually so sweet that again after the angst is done they might have an argument once every like 5 years.
5)Quinn x Spencer Reid (Baby Blue)
From my Criminal minds fic that is currently posted on ao3 that I am debating on posting here.
Actually they argue so often
If he hadn’t have gotten her pregnant in a one night stand they would have still met and would have a love hate relationship
Like without the baby they would be an enemies to lovers trip but instead he immediately and accidentally got her pregnant so now they’re stuck with each other
Do genuinely love each other and after they finally figure out that they have feelings for each other everything calms down
But with her being pregnant and them not being in a relationship and then the jealousy and miscommunication everything is just toxic
Like could they tell each other that they accidentally fell in love with the other and they wanna try to have a relationship?
Yes.
Will they?
No.
But again after the drama they’re actually a very affectionate couple that manages to keep their passion into their old age
6) Ashanti x Cárter Walsh-Kim (unnamed fic)
From my deleted twilight fic
While he isn’t a main main character he serves to be the Jacob of the plot but they actually dare and he doesn’t force himself on her or fall in love with her future child :)
They’re a healthy college age couple?
Kinda boring but not toxic at all until Emmett enters the mix
They’re stable and comfortable and honestly would be endgame if it wasn’t for Emmett
She loved him and he loved her not much else to say. They’re low because they break up lmao
7) Ashanti x Emmett Cullen (unnamed fic)
From the same deleted fic as above I might rewrite and repost
toxic because they can’t figure out if they wanna be together or not
Like actually they have a really good relationship when they’re not arguing and he’s being a wannabe Edward with his angst
Like when they’re not fighting a great comedic duo
And he’s her biggest supporter and she’s his.
And while I know I just compared him to Edward they don’t have the whole turn me I don’t wanna turn you drama like it’s a very easy discussion and decision
He’s literally just hung up on Rosalie and that’s where the drama comes from
And the arguing kinda makes some of his old human traits reappear
8) Fawn x Johnny Slaughter (Accidental Prey)
A Texas chainsaw massacre fanfiction that isn’t finished
Would be lower because he’s actually a murder and is keeping her hostage????????????
Like he’s forcing her to live with his murderous cannibalistic family
And he kinda abusive
But he’s genuinely in love with her (more like obsessed)
And hes the only reason that she’s alive
I can’t spoil the end but dude LOVES her more than Johnny in my other fanfics loves their partner more than just being possessive and obsessive
9) Bucky Barnes x Reader (Mr.Right)
From a deleted marvel fic that I haven’t finished and probably won’t until I get the urge
These two just absolutely JUMPED into a relationship without thinking about it
And tbh idk if they’ll last or not but they do currently love each other
It’s super middle/high school vibes but they do have a good relationship
He’s an assassin though
And has gotten them almost killed
And has taught them how to murder people
And is actually kinda a fucked up guy AND relationship because they kinda lose their mind.
10) Evangeline x Danny Johnson (Between a Rock and a Hard Place)
My dead by daylight x Texas chainsaw massacre fic that only has like a single chapter posted
Is higher than Johnny because he isn’t physically abusive like Johnny is
But still low because he’s actually insane
Is a serial killer but isn’t a cannibal
Is obsessed with her and probably wouldn’t kill her
Loves her I guess if obsession counts lmao
Is willing to take care and love a child that isn’t his if she chooses him
11) Evangeline x Johnny Slaughter (Between a Rock and a Hard Place)
From the same fic as above
Physically, Emotionally, and Verbally abusive
And while you’re thinking IM HOW IS HE NOT LAST
He did leave his family to go find her and does somehow love her that he hasn’t murdered her yet
And even though he threatens to kill her he never actually would unless he has a breakdown and kills her and himself
12) Corinne x Johnny Slaughter (unnamed fic)
From an unnamed unfinished unpublished Texas chainsaw massacre fic that will be posted when I’m done with all three chapters
Actually one of the WORST relationships and probably should be last
But the reason why it isn’t is because Corinne is no longer stuck with him
He physically, verbally, and emotionally abused her
Forced her to kill their child because the police were close to catching them and a child would slow them down
Constantly cheated on her with victims after he kidnapped her and forced her to live with him and his family
He doesn’t really love her (he thinks he does) he really just sees her as a possession.
13) Peter Parker x Reader (the Beauty of You)
A marvel fanfic that I deleted that is a You AU so Peter is in the role of Joe lmao
While he isn’t abusive he is VERY manipulative which is mentally abusive
Has murdered people to get to Reader
Has threatened to kill them
They’re lower than Corinne because Reader is stuck with him like until they die
Isolates them from literally everyone and uses his powers to keep them isolated and needing him
Loves them I guess lmao
14) Rasmodius x Reader (the Wizard and I)
From the stardew valley oneshot
Reader is also stuck with him for life
And this relationship is kinda romantic but the reader is being held hostage as some sort of slave
Like dude doesn’t actually love her just wants to keep his place
Like they’re literally his pet and is stuck like this
And unlike the other bad guys he literally has the ability to make them immortal
Like there’s no love at all, Reader is just possessed/enchanted to be okay with this.
Like their choice was no but this is still how they ended up unfortunately
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babiebom · 14 days
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stardew sebastian H, I and O for nsfw alphabet, pls????
It’s my bad because I don’t think I’ve updated the master lists at all in the last like three months? But those letters are here💖 where I’ve finished his nsfw alphabet <3
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babiebom · 17 days
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bachelors and their weird kinks/turn ons perhaps 👀
A/N: it took a LOT for me to find weird things that arent gross(literally shit or dead people sorry if you’re into these) and even then I don’t even think these are weird but there’s only so many sites that I can go on to find weird kinks or even kinks in general. Fun fact there’s a kink for watching people fall down the stairs!! Keep in mind I’m talking about these fetishes and kinks from my own memory from looking them up lmao.
Tw:nsfw like all of it, cursing etc let me know if I should tag anything else!!
Bc: at least 4 for each? One for what the kink is and one for the explanation?
Stardew Valley Masterlist
Sebastian
Dacryphilia the kink or fetish for watching or causing someone to cry(positive or negative). A kink for tears if you will
I don’t know if I’ve talked about this before (I might’ve?) but dude has a major crying kink. Like he needs to make you cry while having sex. In this instance it’s a good crying. Like from how good his dick feels inside you. How good it feels when he moves, when he touches you. It’s like overstimulation but the crying is the main thing he wants.
Somnophilia the kink or fetish for having sex with someone while they’re asleep.
AGAIN this is all consensual but he likes the way you look when you’re asleep. You’re fully content and relaxed, no troubles or worries. He just wants to make you feel even better to send you to a new level of paradise. And the way that you are free in your reactions instead of holding everything back. All of your sounds and the way you move…it just gets him off in a different way.
Sam
Katoptronophilia the kink or fetish for watching yourself or others have sex in a mirror
I think this kink more so has to do with his partner. I do think he would get off with watching you or him fucking you in a mirror. Like you both can see your own faces and it’s just hot how you can see how good he’s making you feel and the other way around. It’s like his recordings kink but in real time.
Claustrophilia the kink or fetish for tight spaces literally the opposite of claustrophobia
I think he would like the whole stuck in a small closet together thing or the whole (if you’ve seen kdramas bc this is the only time I’ve seen it) hiding from someone in a tight space and being forced to be close or touching.
Shane
Shibari the fetish or kink of Japanese bondage. It’s more artistic than regular bondage and can sometimes be nonsexual(meaning it can just be for the act of being tied/tying someone up)
I do think Shane might have a artistic side to him, he loves his blue chickens and even though he hasn’t particularly shown that he likes art I think he’d appreciate this form. Like yeah it has bdsm tones and he likes that, but he likes the time taken to tie you up, the time it takes to make the ropes look pretty on you. It gets the both of you riled up so the sex might be more passionate.
Electrostimulation the fetish or kink to being stimulated or stimulating someone with electricity
Oh dude is definitely a sadomasochist. He wants to shock you, he wants to be shocked (partially because he wants to feel something other than mental and emotional pain). It’s never so much that it hurts too much but it’s a little stinging sensation that he can’t get enough of.
Harvey
Quirofilia the kink or fetish for hands, but well taken care of/pretty hands
Oh I think Harvey HAS to take of his hands. As a doctor I think he would be happy if someone complemented how soft his hands were or how clean they looked. And on the other hand(heheheh) he would appreciate how nice your hands look, how soft they feel, how good they feel when touching him.
Breeding/Pregnancy the kink or fetish for pregnant people or getting someone pregnant. It has nothing to do with the child itself but the person carrying the child.
NGL I think once you two come to an agreement about pregnancy(in this case you agree to start trying for kids) Harvey is absolutely going to go batshit insane with this new development. Before he would’ve never said that this is something he’s into but once you two agree he’s so pumped up and actually starts talking dirty if he didn’t before. It’s crazy how different he is during this time.
Alex
Anasteemaphilia the kink or fetish for extreme size differences so either a giant or a dwarf(I hope this word isn’t offensive it’s what the website used)
Dude would NEVER reveal this but actually would love a giant girlfriend. I think because of the lowkey misogynistic views he has he would like a bigger woman and a smaller man. He would LOVE lady dimitrescu from resident evil. Like bffr.
Food Play the kink or fetish of involving food during intercourse so either eating it off each other or involving it in some way
Oh absolutely would love to eat food off of you and would want you to lick stuff off of him. Like whipped cream and chocolate syrup are MUSTS if you’re having a particularly long night. He thinks it’s so erotic to eat and consume stuff off of each other that don’t really have anything to do with sex.
Elliott
Psellismophilia the kink or fetish for stuttering
One of the weird ones I found. I think he would think it’s cute and if you do have a stutter or happen to stutter when you’re nervous he’s going to have such a confidence booster because of it. Like YES keep stumbling over your words and stuttering it actually is cute to him and he feels like he’s in a book or a movie or something.
Podophilia the kink or fetish for feet
I think this one is obvious? I think he’d prefer beautiful people and that includes feet. In a lot of erotic movies and books and even in romance books feet have some sort of importance to them. Whether it’s used to dominate someone or to pleasure someone he likes beautiful feet. He wants you to step on him(not in a rough way) and tbh I could see him wanting to recreate the scene in that one tarentino(is this his name) movie where he casts himself in the role that drinks I think alcohol from that woman’s food after it runs down her leg.
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babiebom · 19 days
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Hi, hello question for the Johnny slaughter fans as well as criminal minds fans if you are fans of both
If a woman is on death row for crimes she did not commit but feels guilty for them, would you want her to be taken off of death row? If you cannot understand what I’m talking about read the summery or plot of the criminal minds episode Riding the Lightning (season 1 episode 14) and vote please!!!
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babiebom · 19 days
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Hi :3 Can I request???? Sabation (sdv) x pregnant fem wife reader headcanons
A/N: this is actually really cute and especially because I posted the how many kids I think they’ll have thing I can kinda go into detail for each kid. AHHHHHH one thing about me is that I’m a family oriented sim(person) and I LOVE kids. I know it’s a thing right now to hate kids but I don’t and a lot of my fics involve this and I’m ranting so I’ll end this note here lmao.
Tw:pregnancy, mentions of sex, mentions of pregnancy complications, cursing, lmk if I should tag anything else!!
Bc:probably at least 10
Stardew Valley Masterlist
So in my other post I said that he would have either one or how many his partner wants
So I’m gonna say three because I think that’s like the average amount of kids people have
The very first pregnancy Sebastian is absolutely out of his mine
“Don’t touch my wife” “be careful she’s pregnant” “she can’t have that it’s not good for her or the baby”
To be honest I think you being pregnant would cause him to be more outspoken
Like usually he doesn’t say anything unless he has to speak up because he’s sorta antisocial(I don’t think he’s shy, he’s quiet because he wants to be)
But now he’s always saying something to someone.
He is literally just out of his mind with worry and he has to keep you and the baby safe
STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE❗️❗️❗️🗣️🗣️
If it’s a particularly hard pregnancy he’s even more protective
Like if your doctor says bedrest Sebastian is taking that SERIOUSLY
You are not getting out of that bed unless you have to piss or shit nothing else.
He is so lucky to have a stay at home job, and even if you take time off because of the pregnancy he can take care of the animals.
At the birth he probably passes out while seeing your child being born
But it’s not out of disgust, it’s because his emotions are out of control.
Cries at the hospital, probably more than you do are you have to be like….Seb please calm down I get you love the baby but you’re crying all over them…….
Second child he’s more calm but is still VERY strict with you
Also since you already have a kid, the dynamic has changed.
He completely takes over anything that you were in charge of parenting wise.
Won’t let you cook for anyone
And the only thing you would be allowed to do is stuff you can do in bed
The second birth goes more smoothly, and he actually stays awake through it and is able to watch your child be born
Third pregnancy he would probably be ramped up in worry especially if you have had complications before and this being your last child
Since this would be your third time going through this I think he would be sick with worry but confident that you could take care of yourself.
During the third birth he actually has the confidence to cut the umbilical cord and would probably be excited to do so
Would probably be hesitant to have sex while you’re pregnant
Like all three pregnancies he would be like ummmmmm I don’t know about that what if I hurt you?
Will have sex if you reassure him bc I do think he might have a bit of a breeding kink and would want to.
I think first and second labors were progressed by y’all fucking
Third you both didn’t need to because your body was like yup let’s get it over with
Overall a very helpful and anxious daddy
Actually tries to make sure your kids get along
And tries to make sure that his relationship with them is good.
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babiebom · 19 days
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What Type of Person They would Go For
A/N: I restarted criminal minds before finishing it because I don’t want it to end even though I know it’s been renewed. So now I’m back on season one and I wanted to write something for it lmao
Tw: none but let me know if I should tag something!!
Bc: at least 5 for each!! (Morgan, Hotch, and Reid)
Criminal Minds Masterlist
Aaron Hotchner
I think he likes more maternal women. He’s a family man and he’d love someone who is just as family oriented as him.
I also think he likes particularly patient people he has a demanding job so he wants a person that’s understanding of his situation.
I also think for women he’d prefer a more submissive person that also allows and supports his growth. He wants someone that allows him to be the protector but also is not so submissive that they allow him to do just anything. He wants to be challenged in a healthy way.
For men I think it’s the same thing he wants someone that allows him to take charge but not someone that allows him to do anything.
For looks I think he likes people with soft looks but sharp features if that makes sense.
Spencer Reid
His type is quite literally everywhere I think his type is squally based on two things that can be both or either of them it doesn’t really matter.
The first type is smart people. I think Spencer would like a really smart person he is attracted to intelligence and looks in this case do not matter for him he just wants someone that he can infodump to and that he can have an actual meaningful conversation with
The second type is literally just beautiful people. There have been times in the series where intelligence doesn’t matter to him when he thinks a person is insanely attractive. Like I do think he would do well with a himbo/bimbo significant other that also allows him to infodump and doesn’t judge him.
For both men and women I think he thinks he would prefer a more dominant personality to be his significant other but would find that it’s kinda annoying for him. Yes he’s good at following directions but he would also want the freedom to make the decisions and would probably end up with a switch unless he wants to give being the dominant a try.
Prefers people with softer looks that are striking. Like the person doesn’t have to have sharp features their face just has to be captivating to him.
Derek Morgan
Definitely prefers women that are a bit spicy and dominant. He wants a challenge and he likes women who won’t back down to him even if it annoys him. Likes a woman who will tell him off and stand up for themself.
Also likes protective women and though he would say that children aren’t on his mind he would probably go after a family oriented person without thinking about it
For men I think he would specifically prefer a more submissive man. I think he would have a lowkey problematic pov where it’s like the “who’s the woman/man” in a same sex relationship. He would want to be the male role in the relationship. Would absolutely refuse to bottom.
Would also want a guy that can comfort him. Personally because of his childhood I think he would have some trouble with this type of relationship and would need someone that could make all of his doubts and fear go away.
I think he would prefer someone with a sharp face. Like their face is angles and lines and they have very prominent features. He likes a sexy and model like person.
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babiebom · 19 days
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So, I was thinking and would like to make a small request, how about Harvey x medium!reader?I just want to know what that would be like 🫂
(Sorry if the English is bad 😔)
A/N: I used to watch this show about a medium and for some reason I thought it was one of those ghost show where they’re ghost hunters and then I found out it was like a fake show (scripted actors ykwim) and my whole world came crashing down.
Tw:talks about death, maybe some cursing
Bc: at least 10
Stardew Valley Masterlist
Avoiding ghost in Pelican Town was harder than you thought it would be
Having the town cemetery in the middle of town instead of in some far away corner meant that when you walked through town you had to keep your eyes ahead of you
It wasn’t hard to know if what you were seeing was a ghost or not
Only a couple of people lived in Pelican Town which meant it was easy to ignore someone that you knew wasn’t one of the handful of people currently living there.
When you had first moved in it was difficult, seeing the dead and not realizing that they were in fact dead and not some random villager
But now more than two years of staying in the town there was no way to make that mistake anymore.
Well there wasn’t anyway until a new family (a dad and his daughter) moved in
You had ignored them both and walked past them into Pierre’s because no one had told you that there were new people arriving
And they complained to Gus who was confused because the FARMER? Being RUDE? NEVER
He in turn asked Harvey what was going on because he happens to be the town doctor and also happens to be your boyfriend
Harvey is SUPER CONFUSED because HUH what do you mean they’re being rude let me check on them.
And when he comes to talk to you you’re just like……they’re REAL, LIVE people?????
And he’s like WTF do you mean real live people of course they are
And you have to play it off like you’ve been feeling off for a couple of days
But him being a doctor, that just makes him suspicious because you’ve never acted weird in the last couple of days, nor have you said anything about being off.
The way he cares about you is insane like
He will find out what’s going on he needs to make sure nothing bad is happening.
He is the nosy significant other that almost gets you caught if someone is blackmailing you or something.
He wears you down until you confess exactly what’s going on
And by wears you down I mean he looks at you with those big ass hazel eyes and you immediately break down and tell him.
He doesn’t believe you at least not at first and is like “haha babe are you sure you’re okay?”
So you take him out to the graveyard at 3 am.
You set up some candles and an ouija board in the middle of all the gravestones.
He still doesn’t believe you and is HELLA afraid like dude doesn’t like this AT ALL.
Unlike with witches Harvey is TERRIFIED of ghosts even if he doesn’t think they’re real (they are you see your grandpa sometimes when he visits)
At some point things pop off with the ghosts and thankfully before everything goes wrong you close all communication and connections to the other side.
He thinks it’s cool but would prefer to NOT have ghosts in y’all’s house.
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babiebom · 1 month
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Where's the rest of Accidental Prey at? 😭
MY BAD!!! I started working and have had no time to write because I’m so tired. Like I only write a little every other day to like once a week because it’s like too much for my brain to think. I’ll try to get the next chapter out soonish
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babiebom · 1 month
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Hello hello. I just recently stumbled across your blog and in celebration of the 1.6 update (and also just outta pure curiosity), I wanna ask about the SDV bachelors reactions to a farmer who's ace/uncomfortable with intercourse but still wishes to pursue a loving relationship with them. If this ask isn't up your alley, feel free to disregard it. Hope you have a good day ✌️
A/N: hiiiiiiiii!! Obligatory I am not a part of this community(I am cishet lmao) so I am just going to have to try my best!! I am not ace or aro or anything but like never feel bad for sending an ask like this!! By the time you see this it’ll probably be like next week or something bc I do take little writing breaks so it isn’t absolute trash but I hope when you see this you enjoy it!!
Tw:mentions of sex, some cursing maybe,
Bc: idk at least 5 or 6 for each bachelor
Stardew Masterlist
Sebastian
Is this a joke?
No? Okay.
Would be disappointed at first because let’s face it dude is constantly horny
But would get over it rather quickly like just because you don’t wanna have sex doesn’t mean he can’t run one out
And now that you’re dating it’s easier than ever to do that because he finds you so attractive.
So not really all that disappointing when he thinks about it, really
Sam
Dude for real? Like ever? I mean I guess that’s okay
Sex isn’t the top thing on his list so it’s fine
Like yeah he would like to have it but it’s whatever
Would rather give up skateboarding and music than give you up so not having sex is easier than that by a long shot
Can he still get kisses tho??? That’s all he’s really worried about
Shane
I think the least affected and disappointed out of the bachelors
He has more things to worry about than having sex
It’s not that he isn’t attracted to you
It’s that you loves you for you and sex is the last thing on his mind when he’s thinking about bettering himself and taking care of Jas and his chickens the list goes on
Would actually be so chill when you have this conversation like “yeah okay, that’s fine.” And would never make you feel bad about it because he honestly doesn’t mind
Elliott
Tries not to react on the outside.
I think before you two start getting hot and heavy it probably wouldn’t have come up
Because I think Elliott would want to be a gentleman and not bring it up until you do
And during a particularly heated makeout session he tries to take it further to test the waters when you stop him in his tracks
And he’s like oh…okay!
He’s good with whatever you give him
Sometimes he’s disappointed when he gets the urge but gets over it very quickly because he obviously knows how to handle those feelings himself.
Alex
“Like…at all?”
Would be high key disappointed because dude likes to fuck tbh
BUT at the same time you aren’t just some random whose pants he’s trying to get in
You’re quite literally the love of his life (if anyone asks him he will never say he believes this because he’s scared of rejection)
So it takes a minute but he accepts this with literally a “welp back to using my hand” mentality
Like when he thinks about it, sex is literally the least important aspect of your relationship, he fell for you because of who you are not because he just wants to fuck.
Harvey
I think he wouldn’t really be disappointed but like dang y’know?
Like he doesn’t care that much about sex to really be disappointed
But does enjoy the act of sex, especially with a person he’s connected to like you two are
So it’s not as far as disappointment but is still like oof okay.
Out of all the bachelors understands the lbgtq+ community better than the others so isn’t really all that surprised when you talk to him about it.
He knows what it is and doesn’t mind, you don’t have to explain yourself, you’re valid how you are he doesn’t mind and he won’t and doesn’t want to force you to do anything.
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babiebom · 1 month
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Stardew Bachelor/ette’s as Mean Girls (2024) characters
A/N: i recently watched the new mean girls musical movie and it wasn’t as bad as people were saying it was. Like the singing and the songs were good, the cast fit their characters(except for Aaron’s actor sorry I feel like they could’ve gotten someone hotter but I do understand where Cady was coming from like he’s cute enough that if you’re in high school and in the same class as him at least one person would have a crush on him.) so like I do with everything I consume let’s stardew-ify it!!
Tw:mentions of bullying, cursing, sex, drugs, lmk if there’s something I missed!!
Bc: at least 4 for each
Stardew Valley Masterlist
Shane
Principal Duvall
Is tired of this shit
And teenage girls lowkey frighten him
Would yell and get everyone’s attention in the hallway bc I think he has the lungs
Would leave it to Leah to take over the assembly lmao
“Tell everyone you’re not a drug pusher PLEASE”
Elliott
Damian
While Elliott and Abigail aren’t really friends
He has the flamboyancy I feel to fit this character
Also it’s canon that all characters are bi so it’s okay for him to be in this role
Would probably have all the tea and would be as dramatic as Damian
“She doesn’t even go here?????”
He just seems bestie type
Alex
Aaron Samuels(is that his last name?)
I think this is as obvious as who Regina is.
I don’t think he’s as smart as Aaron is, BUT is popular enough to make Haley want to have some claim over him.
And is cute enough that new girls will immediately have a crush on him
Would actually be crushed if he got cheated on
Harvey
Kevin
The guy on the mathlete team or whatever it was called
Mostly because he’s smart and I do think he would’ve been in some nerdy ass club as a kid
Also at high school college point I do think he would’ve gone through a slightly edgy phase of being a nerd that talks about getting bitches all the time
Would want Maru on the team
Leah
Ms.Norbury
Because I think it’s funny
Like out of all of them Leah would be the one to be called a drug pusher
Like I personally think she smokes weed or eats like weed salads or something
And personally I think she’s above all of the drama of mean girls
Would gather everyone and be like WTF is wrong with y’all we are better than this.
Emily
Karen
Now don’t get me wrong Emily isn’t as dumb as Karen at all
BUT they both have this daydream-y airheadedness about them
And I don’t mean airhead as in stupid either, just more….in outer space than other people if you know what I mean
Like always in their own head
Don’t care about what others think to an extent
If you think about it she fits kinda
Somehow finds herself in the drama even though she’s just been daydreaming this entire time
Maru
Cady Herron
Listen I don’t think Maru would have the balls to do what Cady did
But they both are insanely smart and I can see Maru falling in love with any boy in her class that gives her attention
Would tell someone they aren’t as smart as they thought they were while drunk
She is in calculust yall
Penny
Gretchen Wieners
In the movie Gretchen is very insecure and just wants to be the best friend she can be even if it’s by helping Regina bully others
And at some point turns on Regina because she’s had enough
And is quiet enough to be overlooked as the pretty friend of the popular one
Meek and accepting like Gretchen is
Literally just wants to fit in
Abigail
Janis
I went between her and Leah for this but I think Abigail fits this role more
I think it’s more about style Janis always has a punk rock look about her and Abigail is emo/goth/punk
And while she isn’t autistic I think she is more likely to be called a pyro-Les than Leah is.
Abigail is just the right amount of unhinged to be Janis
Haley
Regina George
Come on this was the most obvious thing about this list
Like actually blonde, gives off bully vibes
Would take over a school and is probably rich.
Would be an absolute bitch and be mean to people then throw a fit when it turns around on her.
Tell me who “world burn” and “introducing the plastics” fits more. I’ll wait.
Unfortunately there aren’t enough characters so Seb and Sam don’t get anyone to themselves but I think both have the energy to fit both Aaron and Damian. Like both are total cuties that anyone would have a crush on even though seb is intimidating and introverted. And both I feel like would have the sass and bestie vibes of Damian so both could be both oof
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babiebom · 1 month
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Classic who is insane!!!
Literally they’re 22 minutes each and like there are like 4 or 5 episodes for a storyline and it’s just everyone being like “we need to be nice!!” And the doctor is like “lmao fuck those people” like HUH the first doctor is actually me like “ugh I don’t wanna do the thing but if enough people yell at me I’ll do it while grumbling” also the Daleks need to get a freaking life what is their problem???
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babiebom · 1 month
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Doctor Who Villains and how I Feel about Them
A/N: idk why I’m on a doctor who streak right now(yes I do it’s taken the place of number one special interest again) but here’s some more of my scuffed content regarding it as a person who has only seen the revival of the show. Though I’ve said I probably won’t watch classic who the edits are getting to me and I might watch all of classic who literally just for Sarah Jane and the Doctor(all of them) being chaotic in a different way than they are in nuwho(I did not know the man used to throw hands like that why did no one tell me?). No the master is not included as a villain because they’re the loml and neither are the Ood it’s not their fault people be mind controlling them. The ratings are how much they scare me so 10 is a lot 0 is none
Tw: mentions of murder, cursing, death, yk dw things!!
Bc: at least 3 or 4 for each maybe more lmao
Doctor Who Masterlist
Daleks
Idk they’re not really scary to me
Like I’d probably be killed by them but they don’t scare me
Like oh no they can shoot at me
I’m from Texas people have guns here that’s like basic
Like I don’t think they’d let me get close enough
But if they did I think I could beat a dalek up
I would actually find a way I genuinely think they’re annoying
EXTERMINATE EXTERMINATE
Literally became one of the sounds I copy
Kinda iconic ngl but they show up way too damn much
I feel like the characters should be allowed to curse when Daleks are around
Like oh my fucking god YOU AGAIN?
DO YALL EVER GIVE UP DAMN????!!!!!
Literally I’m on season one of classic who and they show up HERE like WTF
6/10
Cybermen
Cybermen only scare me bc they kinda give me uncanny valley vibes bc they’re used to be humans.
Like that creeps me out
But I do think I could survive them if I hid well enough
Like actually they’re like only finding people who are making it obvious that they’re hiding
I’m turning off all the lights and opening the doors to make it look like my house has already been gone through
Like zombies but robots
8/10
Weeping Angels
Terrifying
Actually I hate them so much
Like WYM IM NOT ALLOWED TO BLINK
and as a black person I do NOT want to be sent back in time
I think I’d attempt to do the blink one eye at a time thing but I think I’d fail bc I’d be to focused on that
I WOULD however attempt to hit them with a sledgehammer
Like actually I would try to destroy them and then probably be sent back bc I don’t think that’s possible unless it is
I haven’t seen anyone try to just wreck they shit
15/10
Slitheen
They’re not scary at all
What are they gonna do fart me to death
I’m pretty sure it’s something like baking soda that you can kill them with
Like actually they’re no match for my feralness
And since they need larger people (in size and in height) they won’t go after me bc even though I’m chubby I’m short so they won’t try to get me anyways
Literally so easy
And I think they could just be straight up shot
2/10
Sontarans
They have no necks how are they gonna get me fr
Like actually again all they’re gonna do is shoot me
What are they gonna do CHASE ME?
Like if I hide well enough I can bonk them like Donna did
EZ
I feel like if I asked for hand to hand combat they might indulge me
They don’t know I know this one simple trick (being an absolute menace)
4/10
Beep The Meep
Unlike Rose Temple-Noble (or Noble-Temple)
I would not have been nice
I would’ve killed him with a hammer bc wtf
But probably if I didn’t kill him he would’ve killed me bc it’s hard to manipulate me because I’m always confused
Like he would actually get tired of me
And I don’t want the police at my house so you gotta go sorry
Like my dogs will tear you apart get out of here loser
3/10
The Empty Child
SCARY
Have you seen my mommy
Like actually scawwy
Like he’s just a baby and I would be gasmasked immediately bc I can’t help but try to comfort a child
I mean I literally work in childcare it’s something that I can’t help but to be like “omg well find your mommy baby it’s gonna be okay!!” Then immediately I’m possessed or whatever he did to those people
Kid is adorable tho
7/10
The Carrionites
The witches
Eh
They’re not really scary
And I don’t think I’d be in their way because I’m a woman and not powerful at all
So they won’t try to kill me or anything
Like actually irrelevant to their plot and they’re irrelevant to mine
Kinda funny tho
3/10
Cassandra
I mean in the words of the ninth doctor what is she gonna do? Moisturize me?
Like she’s a sentient trampoline she’s not scary at all
Literally throw something at her and she’s dead
Like somehow she managed to take over Rose’s body but like she wouldn’t do that to me
Not scary at all
Moisturize meeeeeeeeeeee
-2/10
The Celestial Toymaker
I LIKE HIM
I want to be twirled around by him!!!!!!!
But also I’m bad at games and can only win by accident
So I would actually be trapped in his dimension bc I would lose
But like eh? Not so bad me thinks
Especially if I can get him to change the terms of the game
He just seems so fun but tbh I think I would get tired of him quickly lmao
5/10
The Family of Blood
I’ve only watched the episodes once each because I actually hate them
So I don’t remember anything other than Martha threatening them with a gun
And honestly if they could be killed by that I think I’m fine
Like what were their powers or like ways of killing people
I don’t remember honestly just possessed people I think
Like that’s like not really scary seeing as they weren’t climbing walls and their heads weren’t spinning as far as I remember
2/10
The Thing in Midnight
Terrifying but also funny
Like haha you’re copying me
Jokes on you I’m not scared I’m just gonna be amused bc I’m gonna make you say stupid things
But also scary bc do not take my voice or my movement that’s mean
I just wanna make you say things that I think are funny be NICE TO ME
like actually I would’ve had fun but would’ve been scared in that episode
Though again in not easily manipulated so I wouldn’t have been part of the screaming and panic
Like would I have committed violence against stupid married couple and the train lady like WYM KICK HIM OUT OF THE SHIP ARE YOU DUMB
I feel like they all lacked common sense that episode but again I’m supposed to be talking about the thing
6/10
Futurekind
They’re literally just people but cannibals?
With sharp teeth
Like that’s not really scary that stuff exists right now
Like it didn’t looks like they ran faster nor did they have like special abilities
We’re afraid of guns and could be kept out by a fence
Actually just people
I could literally just shoot at them and they’d leave
Like okay you’re cannibals so are people now you’re not special and people get body mods all the time.
1/10
Judoon
Scary because they’re dumb
Like they don’t really understand anything except for their concept of justice and would kill me in an instant
Also kinda ugly
SHO TO RO TO LO TO FLO TO
I like the way they talk
But also if you’re innocent odds are they’ll leave you alone?
Unless you try to fight against them
So not really scary just like…honestly similar to the bad cops out there
Like scary but I shouldn’t be in their presence because I don’t think I do anything wrong
7/10
The NotThings
Honestly I just think clones are scary
Like you know that thing that’s like what would you do if a clone of you was right in front of you and it’s like fuck it or whatever
I would kill her
Not because I hate myself but seeing myself would terrify me and I would have to kill her out of sheer panic
And the fact that the more you think or talk the more they copy until they’re 100 percent an exact copy of you.
And irl with my friends I do have an unhinged sense of humor so they wouldn’t even be able to tell anything is wrong bc I talk about eating them and keeping them as a taxidermied thing every day because that how I portray my love (I swear I’m normal)
So they would be able to say all sorts of shit and my friends would be like lmao yeah that’s her unless they eat or do something I would absolutely never do
9/10 scary
The Silence
Do they even do anything except for be there?
Like I don’t think they bother people unless they’re feeling particularly evil I guess
They’re literally just npc’s
Like the most terrifying thing is like them being there when I poop or shower or something and I just keep forgetting they’re there.
So scary kinda but not really
They’re just kinda ugly
4/10
The Beast
I don’t remember anything about this person or thing
Other than it’s just like…satan?
Don’t kill me but I haven’t gone back to watch any season 2 episodes so I don’t really remember
So not really scary just alien satan
Like all I remember is the drawing on dudes face like oh well
And I’m pretty sure the doctor defeated him by breaking some vase or something
Because I don’t remember he gets a low scare rating
3/10
The Smilers
I DONT THINK I WATCHED THIS WHOLE EPISODE
But I was not happy with the doll head thing turn around and look angry
Like NAUR WHAT DID I DO?????????
Was this the episode with the big ass space whale????
I think they were feeding the whale
They kinda terrified me bc imagine going to like a fortune teller booth with the little fake people and it just gives you a bad fortune and it’s face is mad at you now
Like HUH was misfortune am I gonna have because of this
Like 6/10
A literal Sun
BURN WITH MEEEEEEEEE
I just rewatched 42
Honestly scary in the fact that I hate the sun because it’s too hot and I hate it when it’s hot
And the fact that it’s a LIVING SUN and can POSSESS PEOPLE
Like WTF do you mean??????
But also I would have never done what miss girl did so I would not be forced to burn
Also I just read a hella good fic on ao3 that’s tenmartha and the sun is still possessing ten and is OBSESSED with Martha and literally only wants love.
So that has also changed my opinion
So like 5/10 scary but wouldn’t try to kill me because I’m nice.
Tecteun
THIS BITCH
I’m not scared of her nor will I ever be
Would beat her to death with my own hands
Or with a hammer
Deserves no kindness
Like actually who takes advantage of an actual child?????
Insane people that’s who
She better hope she never sees me out in these streets
-5000/10
Toclafane
This just makes me sad
Like they really wanted to go to Utopia and ended up as these things???????
Also just balls that can shoot you????
I think a baseball bat and a good swing would allow you to survive as long as it’s only like one or two
They also have the spinny knives but I think you can avoid them if you try and aren’t trapped
Like haha you stupid metal ball try to get me now as I go in all the hidey holes that you can’t fit in because you’re METAL
6/10
Vashta Nerada
THESE EPISODES WERE NOT OKAY
like what do you MEAN there’s little monsters in shadows
I have to SLEEP in the dark
What do you MEAN they’re responsible for the bones left in roadkill WTF
actually terrifying
Can just kill me whenever it’s dark?
BFFR
They’re name is actually cool though
Also the episode we meet miss mother river song
But like can turn me into just bones in a second
That’s rude
Literally no way to survive unless you’re always in light
And they can turn lights off (I think) so like ur fucked dude
10/10
The Autons
Terrifying
I’m already scared of mannequins and this is like a nightmare come true.
The only way I survive this is if I immediately run
Like I don’t think y’all understand I HATE MANNEQUINS
Also the fact that their limbs can still move detached is scary
Like actually being an adult that’s already afraid of these things I would actually just piss my pants and die on the spot
Only funny part is nine being choked in the back ground and even my first time watching I was so nervous for him
And auton Mickey is actually a nightmare I hated that
9/10 hate them
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babiebom · 1 month
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would you maybe write something with some of the SDV bachelors + farmer/reader who has vaginismus? thanks!!
A/N: fun fact I had to Google what this was. It’s actually VERY interesting and kinda sad. Like I think if sex isn’t important to you it would be easier to live with this (idk if it can be….fixed or made better or not) but like if you’re a person that likes and wants sex I think this could be terrible. Obligatory I have no experience with this(I am a virgin) so take everything in the view of entertainment. Also this is written in headcanon format!!
Tw: nsfw content, cursing, female bodied reader,
Bc: I have no idea at least 5 to 10 for each
Stardew Valley Masterlist
Sebastian
I think that in the moment he finds out like the rest of the headcanons it would be in the heat of the moment while trying to have sex even if you’ve known of not doesn’t matter in this situation because I don’t think you’d engage if you didn’t want to
That he would just freeze and stare. I think his way of thinking is like he has to take a second to let everything sink in
But I also think this would give you immense anxiety
Like wow he’s literally just staring and not moving he must be upset
But right after he finishes processing he proceeds like nothing happened.
Like not going on with the sex, unless you want to and only doing sex that doesn’t require penetration
But right after he’s like do you wanna talk about this? Have you thought of treating it? Do you want me to help or do anything? Like a good loving boyfriend
Is worried but more for you and less about y’all’s sex life
Like there’s plenty of ways to have sex without him putting his penis into your vagina and so he doesn’t care
Just wants you to be happy
Probably doesn’t really understand until he looks it up
Hesitates on asking Harvey and would probably prefer to go outside to one of the bigger cities for an obgyn.
Sam
More mature about it than I think people realize he would be
I think he does enjoy sex so would ask if there’s anything you both could do about it after a couple of moments when everything has calmed down
Does probably panic and try to say that sex isn’t all that’s on his mind and that it’s not more important than you
But like wonders how everything will work with this happening
Like you get horny he gets horny what’s supposed to happen then?
Would probably look it up rather than going to Harvey because he doesn’t want you to be embarrassed or have anyone know that you don’t want to know.
Because of you haven’t talked about it with Harvey yet then that means you don’t want nor do you need him to know
But he also gets worried when it comes to your period because obviously it makes tampons hard to insert and if you don’t like pads and go through the pain of still trying to use tampons he doesn’t like that you’re in pain at all
Actively helps you but also willing to give you space to work on it yourself if you don’t want his help
Is actually very chill about it after you both get over the initial shock and embarrassment.
Shane
I think out of all the bachelors that Shane wouldn’t change anything about it unless you actively needed and wanted to
Like I don’t think sex is that far up his needs list
Especially since he needs to better his own mental health to be a good boyfriend
So unless you want him to help you he won’t complain or be upset at you about it
And is fine with just hand and mouth stuff
Does actively help though if you want him to
Like reminds you to do your exercises every day
Is there when you need a shoulder to cry on
Actually very comforting because he knows just how connected physical and mental health are from first hand experience
Won’t even make a big deal out of it either
Is just like oh okay, guess that won’t work right now oh well.
Elliott
I think he would’ve probably found out the first time you two are engaging in anything sexual.
Is super surprised and wants to help but I don’t think he would know how
Tries to make it seem as if he isn’t doing this for sexual gratification
Like he might be but it’s not his own gratification that he’s after.
If you don’t want to treat it for any reason he won’t make you, is fine with hand and mouth stuff
But he wants you to feel pleasure and not pain, that’s what’s most important to him
Is kinda dramatic about it ngl
Like actually takes you out of your head from how he acts and it somehow calms you down
Might talk to Harvey with your permission to see what the two of you can do.
Harvey
He’s a doctor so best believe he is the best equipped to handle this sort of thing
Is the most likely to push for helping you manage and treat it
Not because he’s that big on sex and that he wants to have penetrative sex with you that much
But because he knows that it’s painful and wants you to be able to live as pain free as possible
Like from what I’ve read about in in the 30 minutes I’ve spent looking it up, it can make things like putting a tampon in painful and difficult
And the pain can be worsened by uti’s, bladder infections, yeast infections, and more things so like it’s super shitty
And I think he would want to make it go away as much as he can and would help you try as many things as you want if you want to try.
Wouldn’t push too much though because of you don’t want it he won’t force you!!
But does look at it through a medical lens rather than a romantic relationship one.
Alex
Understands the least out of the bachelors but believe me dude is not dumb at all
Would probably panic at you being in pain especially if it’s the first time the two of you are going that far
Does not want to hurt you at all, so doing this is actually a nightmare for him
Would probably try the least to treat it, simply because I don’t think he thinks that you can
Would be extra gentle around you after that.
Like I think I’ve said previously guy is lowkey misogynistic but not in a negative way is just like women should be treated with care not roughness
So he would probably pamper you without thinking that he can treat it so you can have penetrative sex like oh jeez she’s in pain I have to take care of her
Would also ask Harvey or at least look it up if you say you want to find ways to treat it.
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babiebom · 1 month
Text
Are any of you doctor who fans also fans of la noire and also the other way around(la noire fans also fans of doctor who) because I think this is an insane crossover and I wanna make a fic about it but like weeping angels literally like ten Martha episode with the sally sparrow or maybe like a murder mystery bc la noire is obviously us being a cop. Even if I have no audience for this I probably will still write lmao. It will probably just be a matter of which doctor I write (most likely ten or eleven).
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babiebom · 1 month
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Heyyy! I was wondering if u could do the bachelors & bachelorettes reactin to / dating an s/o who has really intense nose bleeds when they're stressed. But plot twist bc this is literally the norm for the farmer bc they have crippling anxiety, especially social.
Thank u sm!!
A/N: I don’t know why I thought this was funny??? My anxiety just makes my stomach upset but a nosebleed in front of everyone like some sort of anxious demon is funny. Not the clean up tho. I’ve never had a nosebleed but I know they bleed SO MUCH. Also no problemo!!! Always glad to get requests!! I did different things (so not just stressed because I would’ve written the same thing for anyone I made crush aspects as sort of for stress too lmao) for each hopefully they’re good enough!
Tw: cursing, blood, anxiety, the nose bleeds are VERY dramatic because it’s fiction lmao. Physical fights(in Leah’s part), arguments(in almost all of them). Pierre hate Pam hate(kinda) Demetrius hate Morris hate. And Kel is gender neutral! let me know if there’s anything else to tag!
Wc: idk lmao hopefully at least 100 words for each
Stardew Masterlist
Sebastian:
Just frowns
Actually helps unexpectedly
….we can never talk about this happening again if you want……
It’s not often that you get to see the towns resident emo, even after visiting Robin multiple times for various building needs. So when you wander into the house, looking for Robin so you can upgrade your coop, seeing him makes your brain malfunction.
“Oh…hey farmer.” He greets, moving past you to head further into the house. You blink for a second before returning the greeting, watching as his dark hoodie disappears behind a wall.
You try to force your breathing to slow down. There is absolutely NO reason you should be this worked up over a literal one second conversation. While you sit with your thoughts, foot steps fill your ears and the sight of Sebastian returning from wherever he went makes all of your progress regress. “So…you here waiting for my mom?”
You nod quickly, clearing your throat, “yeah…um…just need to upgrade my chicken coop.”
“Oh well, she’s not in today. She usually goes to Pierre’s store to work out with the other moms.”
You frown to yourself, how did you miss that she wouldn’t be in today? Damn now all you can think about is how you just made a fool of yourself. Lost in your thoughts, you miss that Sebastian had cleared his throat a couple times until he waves a hand in front of your face.
“If you want, I can take your order and tell her when she gets home later. That way she can get started tomorrow.”
“Would you?” Your heart flips as you perk up. Was he usually this nice? You kinda heard from Robin herself that Sebastian never really interacted with people he wasn’t already friends with.
“Yeah sure.” He shrugs and moves to go around the counter, setting his slowly cooling food down. “Okay so she usually charges 10,000g and you have to have 400 logs of wood and 150 things of stone. Sound right?”
You nod and hand over the bag of money. The second your hands touch it’s like your body decided it couldn’t handle anything else from him. Luckily he just takes the money and pretends like your nose hasn’t become a geyser as you scramble to try to keep the blood from dripping all over their furniture.
Sam:
WOAH DUDE IS THAT LIKE….NORMAL?
it’s like from a movie or something
Is overall sorta scared but at the same time thinks it’s cool
“And this is how I do a kick flip!” Sam shows you skateboard trick after trick and honestly you can’t get enough of it. It wasn’t a secret that the both of you had crushes on each other, and even now it was very obvious by how you were watching him do his tricks that you had feelings for him. Yet still you two weren’t in a relationship, just sort of friends who like each other in a romantic sort of way.
“You’re so cool!” You clap as he lands another trick.
“And you’re cute!”
“What?”
You freeze in your spot and watch in confusion as he sort of freezes midway through his next trick and crashes to the ground. His words echo in your head, making your face heat up and your heart soar. He smacks his face on the ground, sending you into a panic because now all you can think about is how he thinks you’re cute, and now how he probably has a concussion from hitting his face directly onto the concrete.
When he lifts his face off the ground, you’re kneeling next to him, trying to check on him. His forehead is bleeding, his nose is bleeding, and so is his mouth. You shriek and try to go through your backpack to see if you have anything to help him. You didn’t.
You already know where this is leading, and you let out a groan of annoyance right before your nose starts leaking just like his. His eyes widen and he lets out a loud laugh. Maybe you two can move out of the weird friendship you have after all.
Shane:
Would just stare silently
Like no comments no nothing
Doesn’t even act like it’s happening
Having a part time job at Joja Mart during the winter is one of the absolute worst ideas that you’ve had in a while. But you didn’t make a lot during your first year of farming. Stacking the products onto the shelves, your only saving Grace is the fact that you’re allowed to have earphones in. Except for the fact that Pam is now standing next to you asking loudly about where something is. Shane is stacking the shelves behind you.
“I don’t know Pam…the alcohol is probably on the wall in the back.” You frown at her. She obviously knows that you don’t know this store that well, you were a FARMER that NEVER shopped here before. She rasps out another question and it takes everything in you to not snap at her. Trying to calm yourself of course there’s gonna be something else that makes you lose your mind. That something is Morris, coming over and being the absolute WORST and in turn making Pam LOUDER and more insistent.
He’s lecturing you, Pam is agreeing with him way too loudly, the music on your headphones is now overwhelming instead of calming, and the sound of random things in the market is making you want to bite a chunk out of the loaves of bread in front of you, plastic and all. With everything building up inside of you, you already know what’s going to happen. It always happens, but instead of excusing yourself you stand there, staring Morris down as the blood begins to flow from your nostrils.
Pam yells out curses and Morris begins to stutter, but behind them Shane just stares for a second before continuing to work. When you’re finally left alone with him in the aisle as your two stressors hastily take their leave, all he does is let out a dry chuckle.
“Sam has a hell of a mess to clean up…”
Alex:
Oh DUDE your nose is like….LEAKING
Doesn’t help
Just watched and comments
“AND THEN HE HAS THE NERVE TO TELL PEOPLE THAT MY HARVESTS ARE HIS BUT HE ONLY DOES IT IF ITS GOOD!” You rant to the brown haired boy, pacing back and forth in his room. Thankfully both Evelyn and George were out so you weren’t bothering anyone except for the man in front of you.
You huff and puff as he watches, slightly amused slightly concerned. Alex wasn’t the best person to go to when you’re upset unless it was something absolutely devastating. So being in front of him now, complains about your farming woes meant that he was only half ass taking it seriously. “You should go and speak your mind.” He says.
Turns out you should NOT take advice from Alex. Standing in Pierre’s shop, you’re staring him down angrily, anxiety creeping up your throat from you trying to will yourself to call him out on his bullshit. The older man just kind of stares at you in confusion because all you had done was shout his name angrily as you entered the shop then stand in front of him seething.
“You….you…..” you point a finger at him. This was the moment, the moment you stand up for yourself and tell Pierre how HORRIBLE he is!
But of course things don’t work how you want and your nose gushes out blood all over the counter before you can work yourself up to the point of accusations. With a gasp you run out of the shop, hoping that he would keep his mouth shut with Alex running behind you laughing. Again, NEVER let Alex talk you into anything.
Elliott:
Panics
How do I help PLS LET ME HELP
Everything probably gets messy
Fishing had never been your favorite pastime, but now trying to fix up the community center you had to. Unfortunately Willy was gone and couldn’t properly teach you even though he had gifted you an old rod of his, so the next best thing is getting your boyfriend to teach you since he does fish often. Now you stand on the docks, waiting for a fish to bite the hook.
“Keep calm, the fish can feel your fear and it makes them upset.” Elliott spoke. In all honesty you didn’t even know if that was true or not, but you take in a breath to calm down. You did not want to be here all day you had cows to pet.
The second your line begins to pull you try to pull the fish in. And you succeed until it comes time to unhook the eel you managed to catch. The eel is slimy and slippery and all around not a good thing to try to grip. A shriek leaves your lips and the eel struggles, Elliott tries to help you but is also struggling to catch hold of it. And now your nose is bleeding adding another layer to the already hellish experience.
You’re unhappy, the eel is unhappy, and Elliott is unhappy. After what seems like an hour, the stupid thing slips out of your grips and back into the ocean, washing your nose blood off of it and splashing you with saltwater. 0 out of 10 you will not be trying again.
Harvey:
Calm but concerned(after panicking for a second)
Has a doctory approach to it
But is secretly like WTF inside
Your heart thumps in your chest as you sit on the clinic bed. It’s been a while since you’ve been in Harvey’s clinic, having taken a break from the mines, and somehow this seems more shameful than having been beaten almost to death by living slime. Your hands bleed into the cloth you have pressed into it. One of the pigs knocked you over into the broken fence you were in the middle of fixing. Now you sit waiting for the good looking Doctor.
When he walks in he’s all smiles, tapping his clipboard with his pen. “While I’m sad to see that you’re injured, I’m glad to see it isn’t from those mines again.” The eye contact he makes with you makes your heart twist for a second.
He starts speaking of all the shots you need and the antibiotics you need to take, rust poisoning is quite serious you know. “Now,” he says, moving towards you, “let me see your hand.”
Your heart thumps erratically at the close proximity of him and you. You only really ever got to see him this close when you were half dead and barely conscious. His face is much too close for you to be able to do anything but focus on how pretty his eyes are, and how fluffy his mustache is, and how…
“OH MY DEAR YOBA” He yelps and jumps away from you. It takes only a second after him to realize what’s going on, and now your furiously wiping away at your nose with your hands instead of with the cloth, and he’s trying to get something on your nose to catch the blood. It’s a disaster, really. But at least you’re already in a clinic!
Penny:
Probably panics
Doesn’t know how to deal with it
Would try to help though
The warmth of the pool in the spa did nothing to ease your nerves as you waded in the shallow end of the pool. Penny had invited you to come sometime after 7 pm, and when you had arrived she was already waiting for you, kicking her feet in the pool. The thought of her asking you here made your stomach turn, did you do something wrong…? Was she inviting you here to tell you she hated you or something…? You had grown close to her over your time here and would hate it if she thought you were too much or something.
“Do you know why I invited you here?” She asks, moving closer but keeping her eyes on the water.
You shake your head, “I’m not exactly sure, no.”
She frowns and sighs at you, meeting your eyes for a fleeting second then looking elsewhere. “Really? I thought you would’ve noticed by now…” her words trail off and her eyebrows furrow.
The next few seconds are ones that you simultaneously want to remember for forever and forget. She confesses her feelings for you. Feelings that you obviously reciprocate, and the emotions in you mix and grow, rising up your throat as if you were a volcano of conflicting feelings. As soon as you open your mouth to tell her that yes, you like her too, her face morphs into one that’s horrified instead of hopeful, disgusted instead of smitten and you realize a second after she does that your nose is spouting red, dyeing the water you both were swimming in.
Penny shrieks for a solid second before trying to scramble out of the water as fast as she can. You do the same, swirling the red around the pool as both of you splash trying to exit the now crime scene looking pool. When you get out of the water, she’s holding a towel right in your face, smooshing it so hard you can barely breathe and now your nose is throbbing with slight pain. “What do we do?!” She asks moving about quickly. She’s so confused that she just keeps walking and turning as if she’s remembering and forgetting things at the same time.
You just tilt your head downward and cringe inwardly, this was not the way to get a girl to like you. “It’s fine…I’m fine,” you say voice nasally and muffled. “And I like you too by the way.”
Haley:
confused staring
wtf is happening
Actually speechless
It isn’t every day that you get to talk to a beautiful blonde. It isn’t even every day that you talk to anyone. So when she approaches you on one of your trips off of your farm you couldn’t help but feel like either everything is out to get you or that you’re up on your luck. You don’t really know for sure, it honestly depends on how things go.
“Hey farmer!” She smiles as soon as she stops in front of you, the feeling of your stomach twisting makes you want to vomit in all of your nervousness. “I have a favor to ask you…”
“Yeah?” You ask trying to keep your cool. “What is it?”
“I would totally love love LOVE you forever if you could bring me an amethyst? It’s for Emily’s birthday and I don’t really like Clint so I don’t wanna buy anything from him. I’m willing to pay 150g!”
You cough into your fist, nodding along and taken aback by how casually she’s speaking to you. Before you can accept doing her the favor, the horrified look on your face makes your words falter.
She looks absolutely horrified, and touching your hand to your face you can feel why. Your nose started dripping blood, and by dripping you mean you can now feel it running down to your chin. A flurry of curses leave your mouth as confused noises leave hers. It's not much of a surprise that this has happened, but man did you wish it wasn't in front of her.
Emily:
Surprisingly chill about it
Probably has a weird story about a nosebleed or something
Actually helps
You sit at the bar alone, upset at a horrible farming day. You tried your best, you really did, but those stupid ass crows actually ate ALL of your seedlings. Or…almost all of them but that’s basically the same thing! There is no way you’re gonna make enough to make it through winter comfortably. You told Emily exactly this, appreciative of her listening ear in the middle of her busy shift.
“You know they probably didn’t mean it…or maybe they did,” she sucks in a breath eyebrows furrowing as she thinks, “you know crows are very smart they probably know that you’re using that land to farm and stay there because of all the free food.”
“But it’s not free!” You exclaim, throwing your hands up in annoyance, “I have to buy those seeds! They’re just putting me into debt!”
She hums and nods, wiping the bar next to you where a person had just left. You had only a couple months left until the snow started falling and making it virtually impossible to grow anything. The little plants you had left you had to fight the crows for. And by fight I mean you angrily swung a broom at the with the intent of scaring them (not hitting them that’s mean). Still the growing anger inside you was not easily crushed by her warm and quite frankly outlandish words. No, in fact your anger grew the more you thought about it.
You felt it coming before anything had even exited your nose, hurriedly snatching the rag from Emily’s hands. Damn now you would have to buy the bar a new one. She just blinks then nods as if your nose becoming a bloody waterfall was normal.
“You know…nose bleeds cause by stress is usually because your heart rate and blood pressure increase and it causes your blood vessels to dilate!”
You stare at her before laughing. Maybe she was helpful after all.
Abigail:
WOAH
WTF
WHAT DO WE DO?
You stand in front of Pierre in front of the shop, arms crossed as you watch his face grow redder the longer time goes on. “-IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH MY DAUGHTER?” You’re not really listening to his tirade, over the whole ‘protective dad’ thing.
“Dad I’m an adult! You have no say in who I date!” Abigail yells back, face equally red. Who would’ve known that he would have a problem with the farmer he rips off constantly dating his daughter?
He yells out more reasons that the two of you shouldn’t be dating, and in turn points a finger into your chest roughly. You sputter out an offended sound, moving away from him. “Don’t touch me!”
“You shouldn’t be touching my daughter!”
“What? Dude we just started dating, you’re weird as hell!”
The arguing only gets worse from there, accusations flying around and now an audience comes with the drama. It’s almost too much for you to handle with now Caroline, Harvey, Haley, and the Milner family standing and watching the chaos. “Abby let’s just go to my place…” you try suddenly feeling the need to escape and no longer feeling the ‘fuck you dude’ attitude.
“No! He needs to understand that he can’t control my life!”
It’s like a volcano in your body and just like a volcano your nose begins to erupt. Now you’re screaming, Abigail is screaming, Pierre is screaming, the Mullners are screaming. Could this get any worse?
Turns out yeah, it can get any worse, like a family fight worse and now all of you are sitting in Harvey’s clinic. At least you aren’t the only bloody one now.
Maru:
Is surprised
Also forgets what to do
Would probably make things worse
Maru talks about robots and space the way you would talk about her: totally and completely enamored. You sit on her bed listening to her talk about her newest invention, some sort of robot that can cook and clean and basically be a free maid. You laugh and move your arm to get in a more comfortable position to watch her. Unfortunately your arm had other plans and smacked hard into her bed post. Groaning out in pain, your eyes close and begin to water from how much your elbow hurt.
Demetrius is in your face before you even realize that he was in the room. You yelp out in surprise as he starts ranting about you ruining his daughter’s future. You blink in surprise and try to retreat back into the mattress. What was happening. You can hear Maru screaming over his words but your ears feel like they’re filled with water.
“We’re just friends!” You find yourself shouting. Like damn is the man insane? It wasn’t the first time he’s gotten upset at you over Maru, but it was the first time that he was absolutely losing his mind.
“Dad stop!”
Time froze for a second as you and Demetrius stared at each other, Maru standing near him. Breathing in you can taste blood in your mouth before your nose starts bleeding, yet you can’t bring yourself to do anything but sit and catch your breath.
“Oh my god!” Both Demetrius and Maru exclaim moving around the room trying to find something to help. You couldn’t help but feel annoyed at him acting concerned now.
Thankfully Maru looked cute trying to help you which at least made things a little better.
Leah:
Is also freaking out on the inside but calm on the outside
Helps you with tissues
Is understanding
Going on a date with Leah is a dream come true. There’s paint, wine, food, and you’re sitting in the prettiest meadow you’ve ever seen, well it’s pretty because Leah is there and she’s pretty and you’ve been here multiple times because it’s near her cottage but it still looks different today.
You sit, paintbrush in hand, laughing at something she’s saying. It’s fun and if she hadn’t have asked you would’ve spent the day farming like usual, this little break was needed. The day couldn’t be ruined, absolutely nothing can ruin it.
Okay, one thing can ruin it and that one thing is Kel coming and ruining everything. The argument that ensues is one of the worst that you’ve seen. Kel tries to walk up on you(translation: Kel wants to fight you), Leah stops them but in turn gets into a fight with them which causes you to actually get up and try to defend her.
You kinda block out until you can hear Kel call out “I made your nose bleed bitch!” Which again causes you to want to drown in your anger.
“My noses is bleeding because I’m stressed, stupid!” You back. It’s obvious Kel hadn’t been able to hit your nose so claiming to be able to hit you so hard your nose bleeds isn’t even possible. It’s almost childish how the two of you argue.
Leah finally gets Kel to leave and hands you a bunch of tissues as she sits you down on the now rumpled blanket. As the two of you catch your breath and calm down, you find yourself smiling at her behind the wad of tissues catching blood flowing from your nose.
At least the situation would be funny in the future.
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