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#i'm sure i'm not the only one who feels this way
ponderingmoonlight · 22 hours
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Seeing JJK men shirtless for the first time
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Pairings: (true form) Sukuna x fem! reader; Nanami x fem!reader; Choso x fem!reader; Gojo and Geto x fem!reader; Ino x fem!reader; Toji x fem!reader; Ijichi x fem!reader
Word Count: 6k (this is literally one third of my bachelor thesis lmao)
Warnings: Spice in Sukuna's, a little bit in Choso's and in Toji's part, true form Sukuna so slight spoilers regarding his appearance, I'm sorry but Choso's part is a lil shitty
Notes: You guys...This has to be my biggest fic yet and let me tell you, I poured my heart and soul into this piece. So please, if you find the time, leave me a like, a comment or a reblog. I appreciate it more than you could imagine 🤍
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Sukuna
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You don’t even know how you ended up here. To be exact, it still feels like a feverish dream to you. Only one second ago, you were on your way to find your friends, injured with your shoulder throbbing each passing second. But now…
Your eyes roam around the barely lit area, gleaming in that unpromising red light that runs shivers down your spine. There is absolutely no logical explanation for how you ended up here.
“Sure took you some time to finally wake up again.”
That dark voice hollering at you, the sarcastic undertone in it. It’s a man, without any doubt. And just by the sound of his masculine voice you can tell that he’s build like a wall.
Is it wise to move forward, to discover this place? Well, standing here like an idiot definitely won’t help to find a way out of here, right? And you definitely need to find out who that man is…
“Who are you?”
Your voice gets lost against the tall walls, echoes back at you over and over again. But no answer.
“Are you the reason for me being here?”
There is no doubt in the fact that his eyes are all over you. Like a hunter, he roams around you in silence while your tingling nerves almost cause you to lose your mind. Who is he? Where are you? What is all of this?
Your feet dash forward once again. Straight into the darkness, chasing after a dim beam of light that catches your interest immediately. Maybe this is your way out, maybe you’ll get to meet your friends again, maybe-
Suddenly your breath gets stuck in your throat, feet stopping immediately. That thing…
You swallow hard, eyes fixated on the most muscular male upper body you’ve seen in your entire life. No, this isn’t a thing. This is a grown man.
“Stop staring at me like that”, he growls with his now familiar voice.
This is him, the person who talked to you earlier. You want to confront him, want to ask him for a way out, but instead you stare him up and down. Those oh so muscular four arms decorated by hypnotizing tattoos, a chest so broad it takes you all your strength to outstand the urge to press your head against it. But what really catches you off guard is his mouth. No, not the mouth on his face. Your gaze gets caught by the parted lips that cover his stomach, teeth exposed to threatful that the thought of getting killed crosses your mind for a split second.
“Are you done now, stupid girl?”
Before you even realize what’s happening, you find yourself lying in his arms, his body pressed so tightly against yours that you fail to breathe. His half naked body, muscles touching your bare skin…
Oh god, this is so wrong. There is no doubt in the fact that this is Sukuna in his true form, the king of curses in his full glory. And you? You are nothing but a tiny human compared to him, an ant underneath his boot.
But why does it feel so good, then? Why do your knees give him, why does your body start to throb in places where it shouldn’t?
A whimper escapes your lips, body almost collapsing into itself when you can feel his mouth there.
Against your bare skin.
Caressing the sensitive flesh of your thighs.
“If you just break into my kingdom like that, then I can do whatever I want with you”, he whispers against your ear.
“P-please”, you groan, not even knowing yourself what exactly you’re begging for.
“(y/n)?”
You close your eyes, searching for the feeling of his tongue against your skin.
“(y/n)!”
No, don’t open your eyes, don’t get distracted.
“(Y/N)!”
When your eyes dart open again, you aren’t greeted by Sukuna’s stinging gaze. No, the innocent eyes that look at you filled with worry belong to someone else.
“Man, you really have me worrying out here for you. You just broke down and started whimpering”, Yuji explains while lifting you off the ground.
Was it…all a dream?
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Nanami Kento
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Your heart races, blood rushing through your ears like electricity. You told him right from the start that leaving on his own wasn’t a good idea, that the injuries of other jujutsu sorcerers make you believe this might be a special grade curse.
But Nanami Kento never listens when you worry about him.
“I’m sorry to bother you, but it seems like there’s a gaping wound placed under my ribcage on my right side.”
You didn’t hesitate a single second, rushed after him with your little case like you always do. As Shoko’s co-worker, it’s your responsibility to look after injured jujutsu sorcerers. Even though you’ll never be as good as her, you will always make it your mission to help as fast as possible.
Especially him.
His signal grows stronger and stronger with every step you dash towards his location, mind racing back and forth. A gaping wound, what is that supposed to mean? Did he get hit by a gun, a curse? You don’t allow yourself to catch your breath, eyes focused on the little dot that comes closer.
“Are you alright, (y/n)? You really don’t need to rush to my side like that.”
A wave of relief washes over you when you see him leaning against the wall of a public toilet. But only until you catch a glimpse of the deep red tissues covering the sink and ground, his usual dark blue shirt discoloured in horrific crimson.
All colour drains from yourself while you lunge yourself at him, thick fear rushing through your veins.
“Why didn’t you call me sooner? You already lost a hell amount of blood”, you press out, inspecting the wound carefully.
This looks bad. Really really bad. If you don’t act right now, if you don’t start to use your technique immediately…
“Take off that shirt. Now”, you instruct him without waiting for his response while putting on gloves and showering your hands in sanitizer.
You fail to understand the meaning of your automatic words until he stands in front of you, bare chested.
Oh.
Your breath gets stuck in your throat all over again, eyes shamelessly discovering the way his muscular chest rises and falls steady.
“Did you just…”
Suddenly your mouth feels dry like the desert, mind unable to form a single sentence. Since you know Nanami Kento, you always know him as that well-dressed gentlemen in that suit that makes his butt look delicious and his shirt that leaves you pondering about the way he might look underneath when you’re supposed to work. There was never an opportunity to peek at more than his veiny forearm. And now this force of a man is standing right in front of your hungry eyes, showing you that reality is so much better than everything you could have imagined.
“Sorry, didn’t you tell me to take my shirt off?”
“I…”
When Shoko wasn’t around, you always pondered about the way he might look under his dark blue shirt. Do his tight muscles draw those valleys onto his belly you’ve seen on TV before? Does his biceps have that popping vein his forearms make you suspect?
You can’t help but allow your eyes to roam around his frame freely. That little scar decorating his chest. Is it from a fight? And that minor trail of untrimmed hair that lets your gaze wander to places…
“I don’t want to be rude but…I’m not feeling that well, (y/n). Would you mind treating me?”
Fuck, fuck, fuck. Blood rushes into your cheeks immediately, face heating up by the horrific thought that he caught you staring at his bare chest like an idiot. Fuck, he definitely thinks you’re nothing but a freak now. What if he’ll ignore you from now on? What if you won’t see him again after that? What a dumbass you are, didn’t you see countless men without a shirt on already-
“Hey, stop worrying. I’m more than flattered that I caught the attention of someone like you but…let’s do this when I’m feeling better.”
Your widened eyes fail to leave his oh so gorgeous face while your trembling hands go to work, mind too focused on what he just said.
“Let’s do what?”, you finally breathe out.
Is this…a smile forming on Kento Nanami’s lips? You feel like tripping all over again, heart pounding so roughly against your ribcage that you might pass out right by his side any given moment.
“I like the way you look at me, (y/n).”
What a simple reply. And yet, his words send you into another dimension.
“You…WHAT?”
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Choso Kamo
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Your body threatens to fail you, eyes in desperate search for Yuji. When Megumi finally gave in and told you he went out on his own, you almost lost your mind. Yuji, Sukuna’s vessel, on his own in Shibuya when everyone chases after him? Megumi definitely deserves another slap for that.
You sprint down the empty hallways of Shibuya’s train station, following the distant sound of battle. Please, let Yuji be alright. As his bigger sister, it was always your aim to protect him. When Yuji joined Jujutsu High, you did as well. When Yuji decided to fight in first row, you did too. There is no way you’ll allow your little brother to die, even though technically you aren’t related by blood. But even as your step brother, you can’t afford to lose him.
“Yuji?”
Nothing. Your body hollers back at you unanswered, mind slowly but surely starting to get into panic mode as the sound of cracking metal grows closer and closer.
And then you see it, the chaos that lays itself out in front of you dipped in neon purple lights. Blood is splattered across the area, the floor swimming in water that escapes the nearby toilet.
The toilet…You furrow your eyebrows. Is this… a wave of pink hair?
“Yuji?”
His eyes meet yours. The so determined gleam in them escapes instantly when fright replaces it.
“Get away from here right now, (y/n)!”, he screams at you just before a fist pushes him into a nearby wall violently.
Your brain threatens to fail you, body dashing into the toilet without thinking twice. Whoever this is will pay for hurting your brother so violently, for causing all this mess.
“Didn’t I tell you to walk away?”, Yuji questions with an irritated voice.
“And I told you more than once that I won’t leave you hanging!”, you hiss through gritted teeth.
“Are you two done?”
A male voice that makes you turn your head instantly. The second your eyes find him, your breath gets stuck in your throat. Oh, what a force of a man he is with strands of dark hair sticking to his wet face, his gorgeous eyes looking at you so unbothered. But what almost sweeps you off your feet is the way his robe allows you a single peek at his firm muscles that are lit by neon purple.
“Oh my”, you mumble to yourself.
Who on earth is this guy? Why is he fighting Yuji? But most importantly…Why does he have to look so steaming hot?
“Why are you not moving, (y/n)? Get out of here right now”, Yuji taunts urgently.
“What a waste”, you jeer at the man in front of you while taking a few steps towards him.
Choso can’t help but look at you bamboozled. How you move so confidently even though you don’t even know who he is, your eyes still fixated on…
His body? Are you looking at his abs?
“That a handsome guy like you acts like this.”
His eyes widen unintentionally, hands not daring to move. He should kill you right on the spot, should end your life just like that of Itadori Yuji. You’re partly responsible for the violent death of his brothers as well, given the fact that you’re also wearing that uniform. But his tight fists don’t dare to move a single inch, glued to his sides.
“Idiot, you don’t even know who you’re talking to. I will kill you just like Yuji Itadori, I will-“
“Will you, though?”
You come to a stand in front of him.
“W…What are you doing, (y/n)?”
Yuji’s voice shifts into the background. This definitely isn’t the first time you get close to a handsome man, but the others definitely weren’t that handsome. Just one look into his surprised eyes, the delicate marks on his face. And that force of a body. There is no doubt in the fact that this man trains a lot.
“I am distracting him, what else?”, you purr.
“I am not distracted.”
“Are you sure about that?”
Before he’s able to think about your words any further, you wrap your longing arms around his neck and hold him firmly against yourself.
“Because your eyes tell me something else.”
Now it’s Choso who fails to breathe. He never understood the simplicity of tender touch, the urge that drives humans almost crazy. What is so special about another hand placed against your skin, about lying in each other’s arms? He might have never understood if it wasn’t for you. You with your arm wrapped around his neck. You, with your free hand wandering down his chest, the wet fabric exposing his tight muscles without mercy.
In the split of a second, he begins to realize what touching each other seems to be about.
“Respect. Out of all the trained men I see on a daily basis, you have to be the most handsome one out of all. You work out a lot, don’t you?”
Your fingertips discover the valleys of his abs even further, force Choso to feel an uncomfortable tightness in his pants. Fuck, he doesn’t even know your name, has never seen you before. How is it even possible for you to have this power over him?
“None of your business, idiot”, he breathes out.
“What’s your name?”
Your voice does things to him his mind fails to understand, his sharp breath now hanging in the air between both of you. You are threatening, your glowy eyes showing more than urgently that you aren’t playing. But that slight smile on your face, the confidence dripping from every pore of your body…Who are you?
“Choso Kamo.”
“I’m (y/n)”, you reply while allowing your eyes to take one last glance at his tight abs.
Oh, you’ll definitely regret what you’re about to do. What if you won’t get to see him afterwards, the most handsome man you ever laid eyes on? There’s no other way, though.
“And I hope I’ll get the chance to be this close to you again.”
One innocent kiss pressed against his soft lips. One innocent kiss that sends him straight onto the ground, emerged into nothing but darkness. A pretty useful cursed technique, probably the reason why you get called femme fatale at Jujutsu High.
“What a shame, I really liked that guy”, you comment with Yuji coming to a stand right by your side.
“You didn’t have to touch his abs like that…”
“Oh I definitely did”, you reply instantly.
Your hands brush over his upper body one last time before you turn around and walk away.
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Gojo Satoru & Geto Suguru
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What a lovely day. Well, lovely apart from the stinging fact that you are forced to babysit the vessel of Tengen-sama when a bunch of bounty hunters chases after you. Your shaded eyes roam around the area without any break, too scared of the consequences that carelessness could have. In contrast to Gojo, you take this task very seriously. You, who is nothing but an average jujutsu sorcerer at jujutsu high, surpassed by her classmates a long time ago. Who, who only got the chance to go on this mission by coincidence.
Well, and then there’s him.
“(y/n), why are you not wearing a bikini? We’re at the beach, aren’t we?”
Gojo Satoru, the honoured one. Of course, they would choose him to escort the plasma vessel. It’s only logical for him to be here.
“We’re on a mission, Satoru”, you remind him urgently without even looking his way.
“Hey, are you alright? There’s no need to be so tense, (y/n). We have everything under control.”
And then there’s also him, Geto Suguru. The boy with the most charismatic smile you’ve even seen, so gentle and kind that it’s almost unbelievable he’s even talking to Satoru.
“I won’t be tense when she’s finally with Tengen-sama. This mission is very important to me”, you mumble with your eyes fixated on Riko and Misato walking in front of you, completely unbothered by the fact that both of them almost died more than once.
“Hey, stop looking so serious, (y/n)! I’m here to save you if it get’s heated”, Gojo purrs from behind, literally forcing you to roll your eyes behind your sunglasses.
“Why do you always have to tease her like this? (y/n) can help herself and you know that”, Geto remarks instantly, letting himself fall behind to mumble something you can’t understand into his best friend’s ear.
You worked your ass of for this opportunity, always stayed longer than anyone else on the training field, always learned until far past midnight while everyone else was sound asleep. There was never anything except getting a better jujutsu sorcerer in your life. God, you didn’t even have a single boyfriend in all those years.
Enough. You straighten your shoulders and force your eyes onto Rika again. For now, you have a job to do. There’s no time to think about something so wasteful as boys.
Your gaze roams around the beach before you allow the plasma vessel to get into the water with a wink. No one but a little family without cursed energy is located around you, so everything should be fine. Also, Gojo would have detected an enemy with his six eyes. Gojo…where on earth is he, though?
When you turn around in order to follow his and Geto’s muted voice, your breath gets stuck in your throat. You really don’t know what you expected when going to the beach with both Suguru and Satoru, but that? Both of them wear nothing but shorts and a shirt – an opened shirt. Your gaze hits their bare chests one after another, races back and forth while your mouth opens on its own. To be honest, you’ve never seen a real guy shirtless. Maybe here and there at the swimming pool when you were training or at the beach. But they weren’t like them. They weren’t this toned.
“Enjoying the view, (y/n)? Looks like a cat got ya tongue, huh?”, Satoru jeers at you.
“Not every girl looks at you, Satoru”, Suguru comments dryly.
“Hey, are you alright, (y/n)?”
You missed out.
Fuck, you definitely missed out.
How is this he first time you saw both of them shirtless? Geto with a firm body that doesn’t match his soft personality at all. Gojo, who isn’t only blessed with his immense powers but with a god-like body as well.
“I…Uh…”
You can’t find words. How are you supposed to say anything logical when your heart almost beats out of your chest? They were never more than comrades to you, never more than strong jujutsu sorcerers you look up to. But damn, at this very moment, you truly see them as man.
Suguru puts his hand on his hip which makes his muscles dance delicately, head tilted to the side in sheer confusion while he walks towards you. Lord have mercy, you really are doomed. How are you supposed to concentrate on this mission when now you’re aware of how they look underneath those strict uniforms?
“Are you feeling unwell? It’s totally fine if you go back to the ho-“
“No”, you interrupt Suguru immediately when he puts his hand on your shoulder.
His bare hand.
While he stands in front of you with his bare chest.
You never longed for men. No, your only interest has always been your training, to become greater, better, faster, stronger. But at this very moment, when both of their toned bodies stare right back at you, you suddenly feel a weakness you’ve never felt before, a hunger that was unknown until now.
“Can’t you see that (y/n) is busy staring at us right now, Suguru? Bet that’s your first time ever seeing something apart from training”, Satoru teases you.
Faster than your mind is able to follow, he stands in front of you, grabs your wrists and presses your palm against his naked chest. His heartbeat pulsates against your fingertips, forces a warmth between your legs you’ve never felt before. Those tiny hair that tickle against your oversensitive skin, the heat that radiates from his body, that makes you almost faint.
You stumble back a few steps only to get caught by Suguru, who presses you against his body firmly.
“Hey, are you not feeling well?”
“I…I…”, you stutter.
Oh god, you feel like dying and flying at the same time, lying like an idiot in Suguru’s arms while Satoru still grins at you.
“Want me to take off my pants as well, (y/n)?”
“SATORU!”
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Ino Takuma
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“Why do I have to train with this jerk again?”
Your eyes roll backwards while you let yourself fall onto a nearby bench theatrically. God, how much you hate that guy, the way he always acts so competent around Nanami makes your guts turn in pure disgust. Doesn’t he understand that you are better than him, that you are Nanami’s favorite student? Ino Takuma doesn’t stand a chance against you.
But why does Nanami insist on both of you training together, then?
“Because both of you need to work on your abilities and you complement each other perfectly.”
“That’s not true!”, you answer along with each other instantly.
No, you despise Ino with all your heart. There’s nothing you could learn from him. Him with that stupid grin, him with that dumb confident walk, him in that oversized black sweater.
“I will be back after my mission. It is your choice how you spend your time until then. Stay safe.”
Fuck, Nanami knows exactly what he did with those words. Of course, there’s no way around spending your time with that jerk now.
“Can you stop breathing so fucking loud?”, you jeer at him.
“Me? Nothing but hot air comes out of your mouth. Save your breath, idiot”, Ino bites back instantly.
“You know what? Let’s start right now. I can’t wait to beat your puny ass.”
You dash to the other side of the large room after bumping into his shoulder provocatively. There is no doubt in the fact that you will make Ino regret coming into your life like this. You are the one and only one who deserves a recommendation from Nanami and not him. Just one look into his oh so confident face makes your veins pulsate.
“What’s wrong? Are you scared, (y/n)?”
You let out your shaky breath, hands balling into tight fists. That fucker will regret every stupid comment he ever made when you’re done with him.
“If you were as good at staying dumb stuff as you were at fighting, you’d probably be a special grade by now.”
He dashes towards you with his mask covering his face. Just in time, you are able to dodge his merciless attack while holding onto your sword so tightly that your knuckles stand out white. Over and over, he tries to hit you, tries to distract you while you swing your swords without regard as well.
“I won’t lose this fight, (y/n)”, he presses out while pushing you backwards.
“I won’t either.”
Over and over, again and again, your body collapse against each other, his flying fist missing your face only by inches. You have to fight back harder, sweat sticks to your forehead while you squint your eyes in order to follow his rapid movements. How much you hate to even think about the stinging fact that Ino is a decent fighter, that both of you actually meet eye to eye.
You ball your fists even tighter, let your powers roam free in your pulsating veins. Still, you won’t allow him to win this. You will stump him into the ground, make Nanami proud, show him that you deserve his recommendation. This is your only way to become a grade 1 sorcerer, to surpass Ino.
With one well-placed dash of your bare hand, his sweater gets torn into pieces while you position yourself in front of him, so ready to give him that last hit he deserves, so ready to win this fight.
This fight…Your eyes follow the movement of your hand, watch how the black fabric hangs on for dear life, how it reveals something you’ve never seen before.
Your eyes widen in sheer surprise, blinking against the sudden sensation that hits you. Are those really Ino’s abs? So well-toned that you simply can’t look away, covered in a layer of glittering sweat and flexed to the brim.
“Oh my god”, you mutter to yourself.
This is definitely not the sight you expected. Of course you know how much he trains, that he has to be somehow fit. But that?
“Why you’re looking at me like that?”
“You look like fucking adonis”, you spit at him.
“Why do you have to look so damn good?”
“Huh?”
“This is not fair”, you continue, grabbing his arm and yanking him towards you.
“You don’t deserve to look like that.”
“Are you out of your mind, you idiot?”, he hisses through gritted teeth.
Like in slow motion, a sudden redness creeps up his face and discolors his cheeks red.
“Just shut the fuck up”, he continues.
Your eyes travel downwards his body again. What a great figure, what a body of steel. Why does it have to be Ino Takumo who looks this damn good? Why on earth does it have to be him? Your cheeks heat up like fire, a nauseous feeling threatening to eat you up alive. Is it even more disgust, more hatred than you already hold for him? No, this feels somehow different.
Is this…desire?
“I need to get out of here”, you announce before turning on your heel and aiming to walk away.
“No, there’s no way in hell I’ll let you leave like that you creep. Did you just check me out? I thought you’re disgusted of me.”
He grabs your arm and pulls you backwards before you’re able to stop him, his eyes gleaming at you.
There you stand, both of you with red faces, just looking at each other like plain idiots while you force yourself to keep your eyes focused on his face.
“You don’t deserve to be this hot”, you reply in a haste.
Why do his lips suddenly look this inviting? You actually never saw him up-close, always kept your save distance to your greatest enemy. Ino is a jerk, nothing but a trash talker, a pain in your ass since you first saw him. But on the other hand, he’s well-toned and strangely handsome with the way a coat of sweat decorates his forehead, his troubled eyes and those lips. Those lips you never payed attention to, those lips who did nothing but talking shit until this day. You can’t help but wonder how they feel pressed against yours, how his abs feel pressed against the palms of your hand. Out of instinct, your head moves forward, closes the gap between both of you step by step. How did you never notice his delicate smell and how hot he looks with that mask?
“Ino”, you breathe his name out like a prayer.
“(y/n)…”
“What’s going on here?”
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
You stumble backwards immediately, heart dropping to the floor. There he stands like a knight in shining armour. None other than Nanami Kento.
“I didn’t know you were still busy, I’ll come ba-“
“This is a misunderstanding”, you desperately try to explain yourself.
And there it is. Even worse than seeing him standing in front of you with his arms crossed after catching you only inches away from your worst enemy.
A smile. A tiny fucking smile forming on Nanami’s lips.
“Is it, (y/n)?”
“I hate you”, Ino mumbles next to you.
“I hate you too.”
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Toji Fushiguro
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To say that you’re bored is an understatement. You feel like fucking dying with that little brat walking by your side. These last days were like a trip to hell and back.
“Let me say I’ll never babysit some stupid kid again”, you announce into the silence around you, earning a cheeky grin from Gojo.
“Totally agree with that.”
“Oh yeah?”, Riko replies challenging.
Just seconds before a blade pierces trough Gojo next to you with full force.
Just before his blood splatters across your face.
“Satoru”, you hear Geto breathe out far away.
“Get Riko away from here right now”, you instruct him out of instinct.
When you turn around, you get greeted by the hottest green eyes you’ve ever seen. The man who forces his blade straight into Gojo’s chest looks stunning with that maniac smile plastered on his gorgeous face.
“Now that’s a pleasant surprise. Apart from piercing through my friend, of course”, you comment dryly.
It’s clear that he’s older than you. Just one glance into his masculine face tells you that he’s no one to be messed with. Well, separately from the sword he pierced through the honoured one.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt ya, princess. But you and your little friends have something I need to kill”, his low seductive voice hollers back at you.
“(y/n), you shouldn’t stay here, y-“
“I got this Suguru. Get Riko to Tengen-sama as soon as possible”, you interrupt him immediately.
Your heart almost beats out of your chest by only a glimpse at the stranger standing in front of you. Finally, something exciting. Or rather, someone exciting.
“C’mon, we both know I can’t let that happen, princess.”
“Get out of here as well and use your reversed technique, Gojo”, you instruct the white-haired man again.
“I’m the honoured one, remember?”
“Well, I’m a woman”, you hiss through gritted teeth while walking past him.
“Seems like we have to fight, then.”
His smirk is intoxicating while he dashes towards you with neck-breaking speed. Over and over, you escape his blade just by inches while enjoying the wave of dopamine that rushes over you.
“You’re hot”, you jeer at him while dodging another attack.
“Ya know, we don’t have to fight here. Lemme finish this real quick and then we’ll have a talk under four eyes”, he replies with his enormous biceps rushing over your head.
“A talk, I’d rather see you naked.”
“Oh yeah? Don’t force yourself.”
A grin creeps up your face while you attack him with both of your swords, swinging through the air so effortlessly that he can’t help but stare at you. How are you so different from all the women he’s met before? So fearless, so forbidden hot. Maybe not his age, but given the gleam in your eyes mature.
What he’d do to run his fingers through your hair once, to watch your expression twitch underneath his merciless touch. You’d sure feel good pressed against his body with your bare back pressed against the mattress.
“Oh no, seems like I broke your shirt. What a shame”, you purr with your eyes locked onto his now exposed upper body.
Just as you expected, exactly how you imagined a man like him to look like. A body built from heaven itself, his abs so firm that you’re sure they’d feel like cement underneath your touch. What a force of a man.
What a shame he came here to sabotage your mission.
“Would have happened sooner or later anyway”, he replies while pinning you against a nearby tree, desire obviously clouding his dark eyes.
You can’t deny the fact that you are oh so tempted to enjoy this little sensation, a timeout from that shitty mission. Carefully, you allow your hands to discover the valleys his upper body has to offer, to feel his muscles tense underneath your merciless touch. There’s no shame in admitting that this was your favorite first glance of a male for a long time.
“You’re probably my favorite.”
The smirk on his face grows even wider while he traps you between his strong arms. What a shame, you think to yourself. You definitely have to tell Gojo to work out even harder after seeing a guy like him.
“But I can’t afford to play favorites when it comes to men. You’re in my way and if you sabotage my mission, I’m screwed, big guy. Let’s just stay here and let that girl live-“
Suddenly all air escapes your lungs, you fail to breathe when he pushes your body onto the ground with full force.
“Thought you were in control, huh? Too bad for ya, I don’t get distracted by a girl touching my abs. Even though I have to admit you’re a nice one. Now you stay here and let me finish your little friend before killing that vessel, okay?”
Your eyes widen in sheer horror as he simply walks away. Him, with his shirt hanging in shreds down his body, exposing his shamelessly toned back to your watery eyes.
He tricked you with the force of his muscles. And you actually fell for it.
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Ijichi Kiyotaka
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Your heart is racing in your chest, fingertips trembling by the nauseous wave of stress that washes over you. Again, something you didn’t calculate correctly. Again, some students got stuck underneath a curtain.
Your feet rush you to his room immediately. He’s probably the only one who’s able to fix the mess you’ve caused. After all, this is what he always does. Making sure no one gets hurt, having your back when things get messy.
For you, Ijichi is a blessing walking on earth. And he might be your only saviour right now.
With rapid steps, you dash into the building you know so well, the building he calls his come. Even if blindfolded, you’d always find your way to the man who seems so powerless in a world full of people who are ridiculously strong. Forced into the shadow, always looking out for everyone except himself.
“Ijichi, I need your help, I-“
You dashed into his flat like you always do, expected him sitting on the table while reading a book like he always does when you come around. But today, that doesn’t seem to be the chase. All of the sudden your mouth starts to feel dry, eyes fixated on nothing but his naked upper body.
His naked upper body.  
“(y/n)! I…I didn’t expect you here today!”, he frantically mumbles while fighting for dear life with his white shirt.
“I never expected you to be so trained”, you breathe out, glance getting stuck on his surprisingly toned chest and six-pack.
“Don’t make fun of me, (y/n). I’m just an average guy”, he tries to laugh your words off.
“You look fantastic. Literally, you’re definitely able to keep up with Gojo. Are you training in secret?”, you insist.
“Don’t say something like that too loud, (y/n). If he hears you-“
“It’s nothing but the truth. You look absolutely…stunning.”
“Stunning” isn’t enough of a description for those butterflies violently racing through your stomach. It takes all your strength to stop your eyes from moving downwards again, to burn the picture of his toned abs inside your brain. How are you supposed to ever look into his face when knowing very well what an attractive man he is?
“Do you…mean it?”
His eyes meet yours, search for a spark of sarcasm in your glance. But there is no doubt in the fact that you mean it. Every single word you said about his lousy body, the praises.
A woman like you…Finding him attractive?
“Of course I do”, you mumble.
Oh.
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lyvhie · 2 days
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nct dream having a s/o who's shy during sex
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nct dream x fem!reader (18+ mdni) a/n: reposting this one bcs somehow this just disappeared from my blog and i remembered to repost it now 😭😭 cw: smut, oral (f), fingering, petnames.
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MARK seemed taken aback at first. like, he didn't want to make you uncomfortable, he wanted this moment to be good for you too, so he kept asking if you were sure and if it was okay to continue. when you gave him a green light, he would nod and take things slowly with you, checking to make sure you were fine with what he was doing and reassuring you that it was fine to be shy. he let you wrap your arms around his neck and hide your face there, knowing that this was your way of cooperating with the situation.
he was understanding and patient, knowing that you needed time and didn't want to push too quickly. he loved having you close to him like that, everything seemed more intimate when you were close together. it was like a whole new level of intimacy and he couldn't really explain it with words, but it just felt right to him.
“babe, please,” he murmurs against your forehead, his voice shaky with restraint. “think you can relax a little for me? your tightness is amazing, but i need to move,” as soon as you relax, he begins to move his hips slowly, savoring every inch as he pushes deeper into you. each stroke hits just the right spot and elicits a soft moan from your lips. he showers you with praises as he makes love to you tenderly.
it seemed like there was an unspoken contest between you and JISUNG over who could be the most bashful in that moment. and, just as usual, you managed to claim victory! despite seeing himself as the one to lead, he was surprisingly unsure of his next steps, attempting to put you at ease as best he could. with a gentle determination, he whispered reassurances in your ear about making it feel good and creating a memorable experience for you. yet, every word he uttered only seemed to amplify the heat in your body.
but through all the nervous laughter and flustered glances, you could sense jisung's genuine care for your wellbeing. as his hands explored your body, they were hesitant yet firm, as if trying to learn your every curve by heart. he gently nuzzles your neck as he speaks, his breath hot against your skin. "i promise i'll take it slow. just tell me what feels nice.”
HAECHAN remembered how he saw you struggle to just take off your clothes, how embarrassed you seemed, so he figured he'd take the opportunity to help. initially, he was gentle and supportive, telling you it was all right, and you could take your time. however, when you were underneath him, hiding your face with your arms and holding back your cute moans, oh boy, that's when he would get really devious. he'd force you to look at him and whisper dirty words in your ear, really making you squirm and, more important, he would make sure to tease you enough to make you beg.
“look at me,” he would say demanding. “i’ll stop moving if you close your eyes again,” as he says this, he's already thrusting into you in an agonizingly slow pace. it would be so much worse if he just stayed still.* “n-no, hyuck, p-please,” you stutter out in a pleading tone as you open your eyes quickly and look at him. “please what? i said you have to use your words, love,” he leans close to nibble on your earlobe, making you shriver. he loved how responsive you were. “please… f-faster, i…” you tried to move your hips to match his rhythm but his grip on your waist tightens, keeping you exactly where he wants you. "mmh, i'm listening,” he nuzzle against your neck, patiently waiting for you. "I-i want to c-cum again, p-please, go h-harder,” you say in a frustrated tone, burying your face in his neck to hide yourself. he was pleased with you words, his smirk widen and he feels his cock throb with excitement. he would let you hide this time. “can’t deny it if my love asked so nicely.”
seeing this side of you, the vulnerable and timid one, was something truly endearing to JAEMIN. “my bold princess is feeling shy today?” he asked, amusement tugging at the corners of his mouth as he pressed a light kiss to your quivering lips. “there’s no reason to be,” he assured before placing another tender peck. gently coaxing your arms away from hiding your chest, he encourages you with another kiss, his thumb tracing lazy circles on cheek. “you’re stunning, princess,” his lips soon follow suit, moving down to your neck, leaving trails of kisses as he goes.
jaemin’s breath is hot against your skin as he nuzzles further downwards, pausing at your collarbone. he flicks his tongue across the delicate flesh, the sensation makes goosebumps break out on your skin, causing you to shiver slightly. “you’ve got nothing to hide from me,” his hands move to unclasp your bra, freeing your breasts completely. with a low groan, he finally takes one of your nipples into his mouth, suckling lightly.
CHENLE would be so confused. he was trying to make you feel good, but you were making things difficult. it wasn't because you didn't want it, so he was even more confused as to why you weren't letting yourself enjoy it. "baby, why are you doing that?" he asked with a puzzled look, raising an eyebrow as he saw you closing your legs. "stop closing your legs," he said, making you look away from him. “n-no, it's... i-it's embarrassing..." you mumbled, biting your lower lip. he let a small "oh" escape his lips when he realized what was happening.
"aw, are you feeling shy? you're so cute!" he said, letting a small sigh escape his mouth as he ran his hands gently up and down your thigh. the touch was comforting, his hands caressing the skin as he leaned in closer. "what about this? keep your eyes closed and let me take care of you, just relax,” he kissed your thigh, his voice so gentle it made your heart flutter. the thought of just letting go and giving him control was enticing, so you nod and kept your eyes closed as he requested. with a wicked grin, he pushes your legs further apart, revealing your beautiful, swollen center. he takes a moment to appreciate the sight before leaning down to taste you, his tongue sliding effortlessly inside. you gasp and grab onto his shoulders, trying to steady yourself as he begins to explore every inch of you.
JENO had come to understand your behavior patterns, he knew that you would react just this way. you were always the type to talk too much and do less, specifically in regards to your flirting. you seemed to derive a lot of fun from sending suggestive texts, spicy pictures that didn't give too much away, raunchy voice messages and all. yet when it came time for the actual act, you seemed to always shy away from it. he had learned to read your subtleties, and this time he didn't let you ran away.
"aww, look at you now," he says, his voice low and teasing. "you were all fire and ice earlier, sending me those naughty texts and photos, making my imagination run wild." he leans in closer, his breath hot against your cheek. "but now that we're here, you're suddenly shy?" he held your chin to force you to meet his eyes. "what happened to the feisty little thing that had me on edge all day?" before you could try to say something back, he shut you up with a hard thrust, making you gasp. "you know, you really shoudn't start something you can't finish."
RENJUN knew you were naturally shy about physical contact, he wasn't surprised by your reluctance. in fact, he knew that you would be a little coy whenever the physical intimacy went up a level. he knew your shyness would make this a delicate process, so he decided to start things off gentle. "that's it, just spread your legs a bit more, darling," he asked softly in your ear, continuing to keep you in a gentle hug from behind. you could practically feel your heart beating out of your chest. you had asked him not to look at your face since you felt nervous, and he agreed. but he was lying, he just had to move his head a little to capture your expressions.
he starts gently caressing your inner thighs, sending shivers up your spine. he feels your pulse quickening and your breathing becoming more ragged, which makes him feel even more determined to give you pleasure. he continues to tease you, getting closer and closer to where you really need him to touch. he traces his fingers lightly over your wet panties, feelings your arousal seep through the fabric. he slowly pulls them aside and slips a finger inside you gently, pumping slowly as he watches your reactions. your breathing quickens and your moans get louder with each thrust, so he adds another finger, stretching you just enough to feel amazing. as he continues to move inside you, he presses his thumb against your clit, massaging it in slow circles. he’s careful not to go too fast or hard knowing that anticipation can be just as satisfying as release.
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Bucktommy-missing scene: 7x09-265 words
They sit back at their table, the only ones there for the moment. Chim follows them.
"So he was calling you a-" Buck says slowly as they sit down.
"Yep," Tommy says, popping the 'p.' "Thanks, Howie. You didn't have to do that."
Chimney shrugs, grabbing a piece of food off his plate and popping it into his mouth. "I wasn't sure he knew about you, but you guys aren't exactly subtle, so I thought it was better safe than sorry. Also it was safer than punching him in the face."
"Hey!" Buck protests. "I have not grabbed his ass once today, thank you very much."
"I saw you guys making out in your jeep on my way in."
Tommy snorts and Buck can feel the heat suffuse his cheeks. "Have you seen him, Chimney?"
Tommy says "Evan, for goodness sake-" and Buck shoots him a wink, glad he's managed to get that Gerrard-related look off his face.
"Not my type, Buckaroo," Chim says as he eyes Maddie talking to Athena. "But you do you."
"I will, thank you," Buck says primly. He glances at Tommy a little uncertainly because he'd like to kiss him, but he also doesn't want to put Tommy in any weird spots with Gerrard just having done what he did.
He needn't have worried. Tommy leans forward and plants a sweet kiss on his mouth.
"Ugh," Chimney fake-gags. "You guys are gross. I'm gonna go kiss my wife."
"Bye," Buck says, not taking his eyes off Tommy, who's eyeing him with an expression of affection and fondness. Buck loves that look.
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teojira · 18 hours
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Scar x fem! Reader/Rover from Wuthering Waves where Reader is trying to get Yangyang back, and Scar offers to give her back for a kiss from reader 🫦
[What's the harm?] [Scar/reader drabble]
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Summary: Scar strikes a deal with you, for both your and Yangyang's freedom. (You are Rover in this!)
Word count: 1k+ (I got POSSESSED)
Pronouns: She/her implied
Warnings: Possibly OOC but the game is 3 days old, have mercy. Slightly nsfw! Scar is down bad. You're Rover in this and you're also down bad.
A/N: I want him so bad, the constant flirting with MC? The way his eyes soften at her? I'm in love with him so bad.
“Where is she?” He's already isolated you for Yangyang, bringing you into his domain.
 It's unnerving, standing alone with a man you've seen cause so much trouble, someone who constantly is trying to get into your head.
The comments he makes, there are so many of them and they just keep coming. 
Is he lying about wanting you? Lying about wanting your trust? Is this just a ploy to get you on his side? 
You're not sure, your brain can't deny that this is a trap, he trapped you, but your brain can't deny that he's looking at you with a soft gaze that you're sure he's never graced another human with. He looks like he simultaneously wants to eat you alive and protect you like he claims.
Scar himself stands a few feet away, arms crossed as his eyes trail along your form, starting from your feet, lingering a bit on your chest until finally meeting your eyes. You swear you can see a twinkle in his eye, and he doesn't even remotely try and hide the way he licks his lips at you, a predator grin making it's way on his handsome face.
“Oh come on Rover, she'll be fine~”
“I'm not doing this with you, give her back.” You steel yourself, hand resting on the scabbard of your sword, ready for him to attack.
To your surprise, he knocks his head back and laughs, shaking his head, the movement jostling his locks. He turns back to you, moving closer, step by step.
“Look at that, that fire in your eye is mesmerizing Rover, you're that concerned with a woman who only wants to use you?” He coos, voice mimicking how an adult talks to a child and you feel small, taking a small step back but the distance still closes, he's not letting you get away.
“Stop. I'm not playing this game with you Scar, let me go and give Yangyang back.” You hate how your voice trembles a bit, hating yourself for his presence having such an effect on you.
“Yangyang This, Yangyang that, what about me my dear? Why don't you say my name like you do hers? With that fondness.” He glowers, finally closing the distance, stepping into your personal bubble and cornering you against a large rock.
“What are you even-” You can't help the flush that rushes to your face, your head dizzy at the proximity. The body heat radiating off of him is jarring, but not as jarring as his smell. He smells of ash and burnt wood, and a mix of his own natural scent and it feels warm and safe. For the first time since you've woken up, you feel protected, despite him being the enemy. The same one who the nation you're supposed to protect hates.
It's so stupid, it's so stupid.
"Say my name.” He's leaning down now, was he always this tall?
“W-” He cuts you off, grabbing your jaw with one hand, squeezing your cheeks ever so slightly, only releasing to brush a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Say it, Rover.” His face is so fucking close, you can feel his breath tickling your face.
"Scar." You breathe out, your head spinning, this is wrong, you shouldn't have let him get this close, you need to get out and find Yangyang, what the fuck are you doing?
"Give me what I want, and I'll let you both go." He murmurs, eyes zeroed in on yours.
His heterochromatic eyes are beautiful already, but the way they're so dilated, barely any of his color is shown.
"I'm not following."
"Just a kiss my dear, just one."
"How do I know you're gonna keep your word?"
"You don't, but I don't think that's gonna stop you." He coos again, moving to trail one of his hands down your back, pushing you closer to his body, your chests both heaving and resting on one another.
He's right, as of right now, there is absolutely nothing that will stop you from this, from giving in just this once.
You lean in first, shutting your eyes tight.
It's Scar who does the rest, crashing into you like a wave, trying to consume you.
He kisses you like you're long lost lovers, pouring so much passion into the kiss that you can't ever hope to return, so when he pushes you up against the rock, you know this'll be a reoccurring occurrence. It's addicting, the feeling of his lips finally on yours, all the tension finally reaching a climax. His tongue is damn near down your throat, swallowing down your moans as much as he could, his hands gripping your hips so hard, you wouldn't be surprised if it left a mark later (a small part of you hope he does).
It takes everything in your power to pull away, but the second you do, he moves to start licking at your neck, you can feel his canines run along a specific patch of skin that makes your legs weak. You place a hand on his chest, trying to gently push him away.and when that doesn't work, you bring your other hand up to run your fingers through his locks and tug him away.
The groan he lets out is downright sinful. He looks up at you, his expression as if he just fucked you within an inch of your life, his hair mussed, his lips glossy from your combined spit.
"Was that good enough?"
"Oh honey, you're lucky I don't take you right here. But I am a man of my word." He hums, licking his lips and letting out a snicker. With a shocking gentleness, he pecks your lips one last time.
"Wake up now."
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"Rover! Rover! Are you okay?" Yangyang has your head on her lap, one of her palms on your forehead, feeling the warmth there.
All you can do is groan and bring a hand to your face, covering your cheeks.
"What'd he do to you in there?"
"I don't want to talk about it."
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ᴛʜᴀɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ᴠᴇʀʏ ᴍᴜᴄʜ ꜰᴏʀ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ʜᴏᴘᴇ ᴛᴏ ʜᴇᴀʀ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜ ꜱᴏᴏɴ!
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mionemymind · 2 days
Text
Chapter 3: Choosing for You
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My Rival Series
Series Summary: The time where Y/n Y/l/n and Wanda Maximoff were academic rivals that fell for each other.
Chapter Summary: The competition is here. Who will be the winner?
A/n: This was a long chapter, honestly might rewrite it, but here it is with all its mistakes and glories. And I'm sorry if you've asked to be tagged and wasn't included in this post, I'm posting this from work because I promised to give y'all something. (Gif credits to @elizabetholsens)
Warnings: Rivals to Lovers, Obvious Feelings, Stubborn Reader, Cursing, Alcohol, Mentions of Puking, Memory Loss, Panic Attack
Word Count: 7.2k
Masterlist
Series Masterlist
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 |
Fall Semester - Freshman Year
“Why does winning matter so much to you?” Winning hardly had rewards in life. Sure, there was sometimes money involved on the line but other than financial gain, winning was mainly there to feed the ego. For Natasha, she never viewed Y/n as someone that cared about being number one in life. Based on the few phone calls she overheard, the university felt like a getaway from troubles at home. So why did Y/n even want to win? 
The brown eyed girl sat in confusion. Her pencil was still as she wracked her brain for an answer. By all means, winning is fun. Back in high school, Y/n would naturally win things that being number one felt like home at that point. But having moved on from that mentality, winning wasn’t quite the same in Evergreen University. Well, it’s not like she had a chance to feel it when Wanda Maximoff was around. 
“If I’m being honest…I don’t think I’ve ever worked for a win in my life before.” The two locked eyes as Y/n softly confessed what was long on her mind. She placed her pencil down and gave Natasha her undivided attention. “Studying has never been my thing before up until now. Don’t get me wrong, I quite hate it, but it feels different now. Like if I just beat her once, then that high will be like nothing ever before.” 
“Does she really challenge you that much?” The question sunk into Y/n’s brain and into her deeper subconscious. She sat quietly, overthinking her answer. 
“I think…she’s the only one that ever challenged me at all.” 
-------------
Competition Day - Spring Semester - Junior Year 
‘Why does winning feel so wrong?’ Y/n looked in the mirror, splashing small bits of water on her face to help wake herself up. Rolling her neck, she could feel how stiff her bones were from last night. Unfortunately, the bus was no help at all, only providing mild comfort on their four hour journey. 
Stepping out the bathroom, Y/n wore the tightly pressed and cleaned uniform as Wanda started her speech for the group. “I want to thank you all for joining us today at this competition. For some of you, this is your first time ever attending the conference while for others, you are returning. Regardless, you’ve all earned your spots on this team, so congratulate yourself for that.” 
A couple of applauses were heard as Wanda smiled at the team. She briefly glanced to Y/n who was sitting all the way at the back of the bus. “I know that this bus is carrying some of the brightest minds that Evergreen University has to offer. Without a doubt in my mind, I know we can win this competition.”
Y/n looked away to the view of the hotel where the conference took place. The turmoil in her gut was hard to ignore as she focused on other things besides Wanda’s eyes. ‘Winning is a must. If I want to come back to her here, then I need to win.’ 
“However, winning is not always the priority. Overall, I’ve been more than happy to see everyone grow into their strengths and even improve your weaknesses. Your efforts have been highly noted by both of your captains.” Y/n looked back at Wanda, her stare as confident as ever. 
“We want to thank you all for all the nights, practices, and energy you’ve committed to be in this competition.” Wanda looked over as the bus entered the garage of the hotel. “Okay, everyone come in for a quick send off.” 
Everyone gathered into a huddle, placing their hands in the middle. “On three - one - two - three - Evergreen! Fight! Fight! Fight!” Their hands lifted into the air as Wanda looked at Y/n with a determined smile. 
‘I’m going to win.’ The brunette thought as she stared into those brown eyes, but little did she know the costs of this win.
-------------
The hotel was massive. It was honestly a surprise at how many schools can fit into one place. Some had to fly in, having been more than five hours away. The group followed Wanda to the selected tables meant for Evergreen University. 
“Break into your groups, Y/n and I will be investigating the brackets to see who we will be versing first. We have about an hour before round one is officially called. If you need to change or use the bathroom, this is definitely the time to do so. If you have any questions or concerns, please let Y/n and/or I know immediately.” 
Doing as told, the members immediately broke into their four person group and discussed strategies for round one. When no one came up to ask any questions, the pair walked off out of the conference room, and into the large hall that had many posters hung up with all the different brackets. 
There was a small but comfortable silence as Wanda walked slightly ahead from Y/n, focusing on finding out who they were versing first. While Y/n was also thinking of the competition, she wondered if they were ever going to talk about last night. 
Walking up to the first bracket they could find, Wanda took a picture of it and sent it to the math club group chat for everyone to see. “Princewell University, Maroon State College, and Gale College, not a bad start. Looks like we’re going to easily make it into the second round.” 
Since Y/n was unable to sleep last night, she made use of her time by looking over the bracket. Going over the many possibilities, there was still a high chance of her group making it to the top five. Round one was thankfully full of easy opponents having judged their previous matches with other schools. 
“I agree. Looks like our main trouble is with Harford University. But they’re all the way at the otherside. I’m hoping Legacy College takes care of them so we don’t have to,” Wanda comments. She turned to face Y/n, taking a good look at her clean uniform and brushed hair. 
“I need you to be on your A-game today.” Unsure of where Wanda’s seriousness was coming from, Y/n nodded in understanding. “If you can give me that, I’ll overlook this morning.” 
Puzzled by her statement, Y/n asked, “What are you talking about?” Wanda crossed her arms, trying her best to be level headed at the moment. 
“You wreaked alcohol. Last night was a supposed to be a get together, not an opportunity to get drunk.” The judgment coming from Wanda’s tone felt like a slap in the face as Y/n took one step back. 
“Are you kidding me? I took one drink. I wasn’t the one that was drunk last night. Are you seriously remembering the same night as me?” The small moment with Wanda was all that Y/n replayed in that moment. 
‘Apologize and I’ll forgive you for everything - apologize and I’ll let go of this whole feud.’ Whether Y/n was going to loudly admit it or not, the small ounce that she saw of Wanda’s true personality changed her view of the brunette. Even if the conversation was small, even if Wanda didn’t hear her response, even if it was a drunk confession, Y/n was going to cling to it. 
Wanda was always the girl that was number one but in that small moment, Wanda was just a girl who wanted to win for the sake of not disappointing her father. Because God, how could someone ever be disappointed in Wanda Maximoff? And how could they not see just how amazing she was? 
But as Wanda rolled her eyes, and hardened her stare, Y/n knew none of that moment mattered to Wanda, not when her green eyes still showed some form of hatred. “I remember last night clearly. Everyone in the group arrived and managed to say check in with me. You were the only one in the group that I didn’t even get to see. Once it was late, I went back to my dorm and slept. But it’s obvious why you avoided me - you were too busy drinking rather than focusing on the competition.”
“That’s not-”
“I don’t want to hear your explanation. Your team deserves a good leader and if you can’t provide that, I’ll make sure that math club will be looking for a replacement captain next semester.” The pounding in Wanda’s head was hard to ignore as she walked away from Y/n, not even bothering to hear her side. 
-------------
‘Focus. Everything will be alright if you just focus.’ The ringing in Y/n’s ears was louder than the judge in front of her. The question left his lips almost slipped past the girl but thankfully her teammate, Luke, was paying attention, easily answering the question. 
“Another point for Evergreen University, which solidifies their victory for this match!” Cheers erupted from the crowd as each group got up, giving the other members handshakes for the great match. 
‘I can’t fucking focus.’ Y/n wore a fake smile as she congratulated the other captain on the team, quickly walking off the stage. Ever since her interaction with Wanda, her nervousness and anxiety came back in full throttle. Her mind went from completely tired to panic. And while her drive to win increased, it came with overthinking as well. 
“That was a great match everyone! I’m so proud of you all for being so great for these four rounds that I haven’t had to worry one bit.” Well Y/n did worry, just not for her team’s sake. “I’m going to go ahead and let the staff know about our victory. In the meantime, go ahead and relax at our table. After the fifth round, let me know if y’all want snacks. I can go ahead and purchase them for everyone.” 
“Thank you Y/n. We appreciate it!” Luke stated, he was a returning member of the competition, one that Y/n knew well. Letting the group walk away, Y/n finally brought her guard down as she walked out of the conference room and to the direction of the staff booth. 
‘I can’t believe I fucking froze.’ Y/n knew the question was for her, yet she had to rely on her team member for something she could’ve easily answered. Wiping her frustrations off her face, Y/n tried to compose herself before she approached the staff. 
“School, team, and placement?” The lady wore rectangle shaped glasses. She offered Y/n a kind smile, ready to write the results. 
“Evergreen University, team two, and we won our match.” Y/n peeped her name tag, Laura, as she wrote down the results. 
“Looks like you’ll be versing Apollo College next in conference room seven.” Laura handed Y/n a slip of paper with the information before calling next. 
Shoving the paper in her pocket, Y/n walked past several conference rooms, their doors open for anyone to watch their matches. None of them interested her, but her voice certainly did. Stopping at the entrance of the doors, Y/n watched Wanda flawlessly answer the question. 
The bright light focusing on her group amplified her natural beauty. Y/n could pick up on every single detail, something she already knew like the back of her hand. Her jaw clenched as she noticed Wanda's smile, the same type of smile she had when she got hundreds on tests. 
The anger inside Y/n manifested once more. She could legitimately feel herself start to boil the more she stared at Wanda. It was dangerously coming close to the anger she felt when she lashed out at Natasha that one night. 
Clenching her fists, Y/n walked away from the match, unable to stand Wanda any further with thoughts of winning in her mind. 
-------------
‘You’re making mistakes.’ Wanda stood in the crowd with her arms crossed. The displeased look on her face was hard to miss as she witnessed Y/n make her third mistake of the match, causing another precious point to be missed. Her brain rushed through many thoughts of disappointment towards the girl she used to hold to a high regard. 
‘This isn’t like her.’ But the frown on Wanda’s face deepened, did she really know Y/n at all? Yes, she can admit that Y/n was smart. Smarter than a lot of people at their university. But other than that obvious characteristic, Y/n was admittedly someone she only knew at surface level. They’ve hardly spoken outside classes or math club. Essentially, she was just a stranger that was smart. 
Shaking away the sadness that was snaking through her, Wanda watched as Y/n sat back in her seat. 
The shame that Y/n carried on her shoulders felt massive along with the anxiety that continued to paralyze her more and more. The brown eyed girl was certain of her answer, so when the judge loudly announced that she gotten it wrong, embarrassment flooded her senses knowing that Wanda was in the crowd, silently judging her every move. 
It all came down to the final question of the match. Whoever answers correctly will have to verse Wanda’s team. Luke, once again, got up, ready to answer the question. All eyes were on him besides Wanda and Y/n. 
As the two finally locked eyes, Y/n couldn’t help but drown further in Wanda’s rage. ‘Forget everything I ever said - I do fucking hate you, Wanda Maximoff. And I hope you never forget that.’
-------------
“We need to talk.” Celebrations for Evergreen University were deaf to Wanda’s ears as she held Y/n’s wrist. Quickly, she led them out the crowd and through the near empty hallway outside the conference room. Dropping her wrist, Wanda stood there fuming with anger. 
“What was that?” Y/n didn’t want to speak, unsure of what would be the ‘correct’ choice of words for the brunette. And by the looks of it, nothing was going to satisfy her. Choosing to be silent anger Wanda ever further. 
“This isn’t the time to be childish - you’re making mistakes and if it wasn’t for your team, you wouldn’t have had this spot in the finals.” Y/n clenched her jaw as she bit her tongue. Sure she made mistakes, but it hurt Y/n to realize that Wanda didn’t even care for the ways she did contribute to the team. 
Mistakes were permanent for the girl that was always perfect. That was something Y/n realized now more than ever. 
“Can you not let go of three mistakes, Captain?” Y/n continued to stare off at the other side of the hallway, refusing to make eye contact with Wanda. Her words sneered off her mouth, feeling disgusted at the way Wanda ridiculed her every move. 
“Un-fucking-believable. Dean Holloway was right.” At the mention of the Dean, Y/n’s blood ran cold. Her eyes locked with Wanda’s, as the brunette stood there. “You take everything as some type of joke. And to think I stood up for you.” 
Y/n’s mind scrambled on what possibly happened between Dean Holloway and Wanda. ‘Does she know about my scholarship?’
But why on Earth would Wanda assume such things if she knew about her scholarship? Pressing for more information, Y/n asked, “What did he say?”
Wanda rolled her eyes. ‘Of course that’s what she would focus on rather than her own mistakes.’ Looking at the time, there were twenty minutes left before the final. The brunette should have been using this time to help practice with her team, yet here she was arguing with Y/n. 
“Last week,” Wanda sighed. This all felt pointless to admit but she felt that Y/n needed to know. Maybe this could be what straightened up her act. “Dean Holloway asked me to reconsider your place in this competition.” 
“What?” Y/n took a step back at the confession, feeling more hopeless at how rigged everything was. ‘How could he do this to me?” 
“I told him that I could trust you - that you were the only person besides me adequate enough to lead the math club. Somehow, he managed to let me know that you were slipping in classes. No longer being at the top.” Wanda looked at Y/n. She focused on all the minor details of the face that haunted her mind. But upon seeing how hurt those brown eyes looked, Wanda couldn’t help but falter slightly. 
“I wanted to believe that it was all wrong, but now…” Y/n silently pleaded as her mind went into overdrive. Couldn’t Wanda see how innocent she was? How she had been studying day and night for weeks just to make it another year at Evergreen? Couldn’t she see that this was all for her? 
“I think we should go back to our groups. We need to prepare for the final. But Y/l/n…after this competition, we might have to reconsider your place as captain for math club.” 
How cruel the world must be for the universe to deal Y/n such a bad draw? And how awful it must feel to know that Wanda was the one that delivered the final blow? 
-------------
‘I have to win for me.’ Water dripped down Y/n’s face as she stared at herself in the mirror. There was five minutes left before she was expected to take the stage. Currently, Y/n was in the bathroom, hoping to subside the panic attack that was itching to come out. 
‘Even if the school doesn’t want me, even if Wanda doesn’t want me, I want this more than anyone.’ Gripping the counter for stability, Y/n slowed her breathing down, hoping it would be enough. She wasn’t going to let the world decide her fate even if it had cheated her of a fair opportunity. 
-------------
“Welcome everyone for the final match for the annual math club state competition. I’m thrilled to announce that this year’s top two teams both come from Evergreen University!” Applause rumbled throughout the large conference room as the rest of the school's watch in anticipation. 
Wanda sat in her seat, overthinking her conversation with Y/n earlier. ‘Did I go overboard?’ Sneaking a glance at Y/n, it was hard to get a read of what the brown eyed girl was thinking. ‘Whatever, she needed to know.’
Pushing her thoughts to the back, the brunette focused back on the competition. It was finally her turn to go up as well as Y/n’s. 
“Please find the inverse of the following equation.” Like a switch, everything in Wanda’s mind grew silent as she focused on the question on the screen. In seconds flat, she hit the buzzer to submit her answer. 
“And the correct answer choice was…C, point goes to team # 1.” This was Wanda’s element - this was her reason for being. Glancing at Y/n, Wanda knew her purpose. She was number one and god forbid anyone that stood in her way. 
-------------
The competition went by like a blur. In the first quarter of questions, Wanda’s team led with a gap of seven points. However, after a couple small mistakes by her team members, Y/n’s team was able to catch up and shorten the gap. 
Right now, there are only five questions left. The score remained tied as Y/n tried her best to remain perfect. If things were to continue the way they were, the last question would determine the winner. 
Before she knew it, it was finally her turn. Standing up to take the podium, Y/n glanced at Wanda accidentally locking eyes. ‘I will be the one to defeat you, Maximoff. I will make sure of it.’
-------------
Fall Semester - Freshman Year 
“I’ve never seen you study so much before. It’s kinda freaky.” The two roommates sat around the small circular table in the middle of the room, enjoying a couple of drinks and snacks. Natasha begged for Y/n to stop for at least a small break, having missed talking to her roommate. 
“Trust me, I hate it just as much as you do.” Y/n stretched her legs at her sat position. Rolling her neck around, a couple of pops and clicks could be heard. 
“Why do it? Your grades are fine the way they are.” Y/n looked back at the pile of books on her desk. She never really recalled studying this much before during her high school days. Heck, she’s been able to get by this whole time just by how naturally smart she was. So when she looked back at Natasha, there was this ‘ya know’ look in Y/n’s eyes. “Does it have to do with Wanda?”
Y/n smiled at the mention of the brunette. It was odd at how many classes they were in together even though their majors were entirely different. There was something about Wanda that caught Y/n’s eye. She didn’t quite know what it was and didn’t quite want to delve too much into it. 
“And if it does?” Y/n sipped on her drink, a smirk on her face as she avoided Natasha’s question. The red head shook her head, grabbing a chip.
“Well - you speak of her like she’s a God.” Eating a couple more, Natasha watched as the glimmer in Y/n’s eye brightened every time the brunette was brought up. Like the simple mention of Wanda could make Y/n smile instantly. 
“Wrong, Wanda’s not a God. Gods make mistakes,” getting closer to Natasha’s face, the red head could smell the faint of alcohol on Y/n’s lips, “and Wanda Maximoff does not make mistakes.” 
Y/n leaned back, still drinking the rest of her drink as Natasha looked at her roommate with a puzzled look. “Whatever you say. Just try not to make this a habit now.”
Y/n shook her head, feeling optimistic that she’d beat Wanda soon enough. Probably in the same semester. “I won’t. Promise.” 
-------------
“Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in our state’s history the competition’s fate lied in the last question.” The crowd applauded for the accomplishment as the judges beamed in smiles towards Evergreen University. “.As your judges, we believe this calls for a special problem. We’ve rewritten the last question to make it a more challenging problem.”
“With one point in the lead, if Wanda answers the question correctly, her team will solidify the win. If Y/n answers the question correctly, this competition will proceed to overtime.” 
Y/n and Wanda stood at their podiums, anticipation both killing them. “Here is your question.” 
As the screen showed off the problem, Y/n could feel herself standing tall as she looked over the problem. It was a multistep calculus problem that involved finding the inverse of a 3x3 matrix. Essentially, a problem that would require two pages of work just to find a solution. And by the looks of it, Wanda was already finished with the first quarter of the work. 
Calming her breathing down, Y/n cleared the noise from her head.  She looked back at the problem, digesting all of what it told. ‘This is just another problem, Y/n.’ Thinking lightly back to the days where math was just a fun activity to do, Y/n finally smiled, remembering the feeling where math naturally came to her. 
Letting the feeling sink in, Y/n started to solve it. The crowd waited with whispers and talks of who was going to win. Many people in the crowd believed Wanda would secure another victory as she did in the past. Very few people cheered for Y/n, simply wanting to believe in the underdog. 
A few minutes later, Y/n approached the final bits of her answer, immediately eyeing the answer choice on the screen. Her heart skipped a beat realizing that she could do this - that she could win. 
Before she could reach out for the answer, Wanda had buzzed in first with her choice. Suddenly, everything inside Y/n shut down as she saw Wanda smile once again. It was that infamous smile that she grew so used to. 
‘This can’t be it. This can’t be the end.’ Feeling herself lock up again, Y/n didn’t dare to look at the screen, hoping to save some of her dignity that was barely left. 
Believing the world to be crashing in front of her, she failed to realize that Wanda had made a mistake. The screen glowed in bright red as her answer choice was incorrect. “Y/n, looks like the question is left to you. You haven’t locked in your answer, so what will it be?” 
Y/n looked up, unable to digest that Wanda actually messed up. The Wanda Maximoff made a mistake. Fighting back the smile on her face, Y/n reached out for the correct answer choice, her finger tips grazing answer choice B. 
The smug look on her face was hard to miss. Everyone on her team knew they would come home with the victory. Wanda’s team sighed in defeat knowing that Y/n would answer correctly. 
So why did everything change when Y/n glanced at Wanda? Why did her heart hurt at the sight of Wanda spilling angry and frustrated tears? Why did her breathing stop? And why did all thoughts consume her? 
Wanda never cried or at least in front of Y/n or anybody. She was always the strong and confident girl that knew every answer for every question. She walked like she was untouchable. So how did she mess up? 
‘Please stop crying,’ she thought. Her heart constricted knowing she was the reason Wanda was crying. Yet every ounce of her brain yelled for her to press the damn answer, to finally prove to Wanda that she could be defeated, to finally get the win that she had been craving for since freshman year. 
So why couldn’t she just fucking press it? Looking back at the crowd and at the answer written down on her paper, her free hand crumpled the sheet as her heart overtook what her mind pleaded. 
Feeling like time stopped, Y/n held her breath when those green eyes locked with her. ‘I want to win…I want to stay…but at the cost of this…this isn’t a win.’ 
Beyond logic and reason, Y/n pressed her answer. Confetti blew in the air as the judge announced, “And the winner is team # 1 with Wanda Maximoff as their team captain. Congratulations to Evergreen University!” 
Regardless of what Wanda had ever done, said, or thought, Y/n knew that today was all because the school wanted to so badly pin Wanda against her. But Y/n finally knew better. This will not be the day she wins. This will be the day she was finally okay to be second to Wanda. 
-------------
Many cheers and laughter filled the bus as the group celebrated the Evergreen University win. Wanda had been smiling so hard since the award ceremony that her cheeks started to hurt.
As she looked over the trophy, her eyes couldn’t stop looking at the sleeping figure near the back of the bus. ‘I almost lost it,’ Wanda thought. It was unlike her to make a mistake and if she was being honest, she didn’t know what to blame. 
As much as she wanted to overlook her work, she wanted to leave that mistake in the past and enjoy the win. But as she kept looking back to Y/n, who hadn’t said a word to her since the final match, Wanda couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong. 
Regardless, the drive back to Evergreen was filled with joy as Y/n finally slept after a long exhausting day. 
-------------
Finals Week - Spring Semester - Junior Year
Wanda loved winning…but lately, it had a sour taste in her mouth. Finals week came in full swing, giving zero time for Wanda to dissect this weird feeling in her chest. She had helped some of her friends and classmates with studying, making her even more busy than usual. 
By the time she was done with tests, the sour feeling still sat in her chest. With only two days left, Wanda couldn’t help but lose some sleep over this feeling. Why was winning suddenly so bad? When did it become something she felt guilty for? 
Subconsciously, her mind gravitated towards Y/n. In her dreams, the moment before Y/n answered the final question replayed constantly. It was as if her mind took a vivid recording of the whole interaction. And as she replayed the moment she locked eyes with Y/n, Wanda couldn’t help but feel like the trophy wasn’t meant for her. 
Of course she downplayed the scenario, believing that this was another mistake that Y/n had made for that day. And the words of Dean Holloway, this was something Y/n never took seriously. So why did she vividly remember how Y/n’s eyes looked the moment she had chosen her answer? Why did Y/n look so accepting of defeat? Why was there no anger or thrive behind them? 
And the more she thought, the more she realized how little she saw of Y/n during the whole week. Friday, the last day of the semester, came around. During the test, her mind suddenly diverted to her. So when Wanda looked up and found Y/n in the crowd, she couldn’t help but want to talk to her, to see what exactly happened in that moment. 
Was it something she made up in her head? Was she feeling weird for actually making a mistake in front of people? Was this blown out of proportion? 
Regardless, Wanda didn’t dare describe this feeling as part of missing Y/n. Cause if she had, maybe she would have realized sooner that winning felt wrong this time. Because maybe, just maybe, it had pushed away the person that actually understood her better than anyone else. 
-------------
Last Night - Spring Semester - Junior Year
Y/n Y/l/n,
We regret to inform you that your scholarship has been revoked for the following 2019 fall semester. This decision was not made lightly as the board is aware of the accomplishments you’ve brought to Evergreen University. Nevertheless, the requirement to place #1 in the most recent STEM competition was something we could not ignore. 
We do hope you decide to enroll for your senior year. For further information on financial aid or loan applications, please visit the Bursar’s office. 
Dean of the College of Arts & Sciences
Cedric Holloway 
Evergreen University
The letter sat on the Y/n’s near empty desk as she continued to pack in preparation for tomorrow. It was the last night on campus for every student. While many chose to celebrate it with a party, Y/n chose to spend it alone. 
The silence of her room provided some comfort as she cleared her bookshelf. “Why must I have so many books?” 
While Y/n never imagined this would be where her college career with Evergreen ended, she certainly never regretted her choice. Then again, she hadn’t been home in forever, so that may change soon once she goes back. 
Looking back at Natasha’s fully furnished side, Y/n could feel some guilt rising to her chest as she hadn’t broken the news yet to her best friend. Not wanting to burden the red head with a sad night, Y/n remained silent, hoping tomorrow would be best to break the news. 
As for Y/n’s group, none of them were particularly angry about her mistake. Everyone tried their best to cheer their captain up, providing some comforting smiles and words. None of it truly mattered though. This was Y/n’s choice to make and she fully knew the consequences of it. 
So for the first time in a while, Y/n was actually alone and not studying. That was until she came. Wanda stood in the hallway, thinking of how she would talk to Y/n, to hopefully apologize. She carried the trophy that was mailed in from the conference, one that actually had her name engraved on it. 
But the trophy felt heavy and awkward in her hands, but it was the closest thing Wanda could think of as a conversation starter. Pushing her anxieties away, Wanda walked to Y/n’s dorm, surprised that the door was actually opened. 
The first thing she noticed was the pile of boxes that almost blocked the doorway. Looking past it, Wanda couldn’t help but notice how bare Y/n’s side looked. 
“What are you doing?” Y/n jumped from the corner of her room, hand on her chest.
 “Jesus Christ, Maximoff, can you give a girl a warning?” 
Wanda placed the trophy in the hallway, and walked around Y/n’s room, not caring for an invitation inside. Thinking back to the dorm setup, Evergreen University typically had students stay in the same dorm assigned to them from freshman year all the way to junior year. During senior year, students would be upgraded to bigger dorms. 
“I thought you couldn’t transfer dorms till senior year was closer?” Wanda turned around to face Y/n, the empty side didn’t make sense as juniors typically left their items alone throughout the summer. 
Y/n’s eyes glanced at the letter on her desk. “I’m moving to a new scenery.” She picked up the box with her knick knacks and placed it on top of the letter, hoping Wanda didn’t notice. The brown eyed girl leaned against her desk. She tilted her head noticing the shiny object in the hallway. 
“Is that the trophy?” Wanda looked back, almost forgetting what she came here to do. She walked back to the hallway and grabbed the trophy. Their fingers brushed as Wanda handed it to Y/n. “Wow! It’s…it’s really beautiful.” 
Y/n rubbed her thumb across Wanda’s name. Wanda Maximoff 2019 Champion. “Congratulations by the way. Sorry I wasn’t able to say it back on stage.” Y/n handed the trophy back to Wanda. If the girl was paying attention, she would’ve noted the odd look Wanda gave her. 
Something was different and Wanda hated it. Winning always gave her a high but something about this interaction increased the bittersweet feeling in her chest. “What dorm hall are you relocating to?” Wanda placed the trophy on Y/n’s desk. “I could help you out if you need it.” 
Already ready to help out, Wanda lifted the box of knick knacks, her fingers brushing over the letter. “Wanda-,” Y/n startled herself, not expecting to nearly yell at Wanda, “I- I -” 
No words left Y/n’s mouth as those green eyes stared back at her. Suddenly, all those times where they yelled in each other's face came to mind. How close were they to ever…? 
Y/n sighed, there was no use hiding from the truth now. “I’m actually going back home.” Wanda placed the box back down, still not understanding why Y/n’s things were packed. “I’m-” 
Y/n scratched the back of her neck, avoiding Wanda’s stare. “I’m transferring to Langford University.” An eerie silence settled in Y/n’s room. So when Y/n got the courage to look back at Wanda, she hadn’t expected the teary eyes and offended look on Wanda’s face.
“You’re transferring? Why?” Moving off the desk, Y/n sat on her bed as Wanda leaned back on to the desk. “It’s - complicated. I really don’t want to go into it.” 
Wanda’s hand balled up into a fist. The lack of details pissed her off. “You’re seriously not coming back?” Wanda hated how bitter everything tasted. The sight of her trophy pissed her off even more. 
Y/n opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. She didn’t know what to say. She was leaving what she called home for the past three years. Not only that, she was leaving the girl that has been there since her first day. What could she even say?
Before she could admit anything, Y/n’s phone rang, breaking the tense atmosphere. “Sorry, let me take this real quick.” Y/n walked out to the hallway to answer her phone. 
Wanda sighed with her head hung low. What was she going to do now? Being #1 was something her parents always pressured her to do. But ever since she met Y/n, #1 was something that motivated her to get out of bed and start the day extra early. Meeting Y/n meant countless hours studying just to make sure she knew the lessons by heart. Meeting Y/n meant her life revolved around beating the girl in every single thing. And as harsh as it sounded, it was the only way Wanda knew to get closer. 
She turned around and glanced at the open box. There was a various amount of figurines, crystals, and journals thrown in. Wanda picked up a green crystal, one that almost matched her eyes. She remembered the day back in freshman year where Y/n had admitted she recently got into collecting crystals. Wanda thought at first it was a waste of money until she stopped by a local shop. 
The red head could see why it was intriguing to buy them especially when you believe the auras and specialities that a certain rock can bring to your life. So in secret, Wanda bought a sphere of rose quartz and placed it in her room. She didn’t notice anything different in her life but then again, all her thoughts already surrounded Y/n. 
Wanda looked back at the hallway and could hear Y/n still talking on the phone. It felt wrong to steal, especially since that was a no no in the crystal community. But the idea of Y/n leaving her without a single thing to keep for herself felt cruel. So when she slipped on the necklace, as if it already belonged to her, she could feel her heart skip a beat at the thought of Y/n giving it to her. 
Wanda tucked the crystal under her shirt when her fingers brushed the letter once more. The school logo printed on the top right called her name. It felt wrong to intrude, but the more she reminded herself of the situation, the less she cared about her morals. 
Gently sliding the letter from under the box, Wanda quickly read it. Eyebrows furrowed, Wanda read “We regret to inform you…”
Y/n shuffled back into the room causing Wanda to straighten up. “Sorry about that. I need to get Natasha. She’s stuck at some frat party without a ride back home.” The brunette crumpled the piece of paper and tucked it into her pocket.  Y/n was too distracted to notice. “Again, I’m really sorry but congratulations on the win Wanda.” Y/n looked at Wanda with the most sincere eyes. “Incase no one has told you, I’m really proud of you.” 
With one last look, Y/n left her dorm, hoping the Wanda would be decent enough to lock it up for her. And all Wanda could focus on was the sound of her name leaving Y/n’s lips. ‘You never call me Wanda.’
-------------
‘Like hell I’m going to let this happen.’ Wanda stormed into her father’s office, knowing he would be working another late night. The clear warm glow from his room indicated that he was there. 
Storming through the doors caused him to look up from his computer, clearly unexpecting guests at that moment. 
“Give her scholarship back.” Wanda slammed the letter onto his desk, crossing her arms hoping to show that she wasn’t messing around. The brunette couldn’t think straight about anything after she fully read the letter, and by now, she didn’t know whether to strangle Y/n for not telling her or for her father to even approve such decisions. 
“This decision was not made lightly.” Wanda could read past her father’s sentence and she was not going to take no for an answer. 
“Then clearly you’ve made the wrong decision.” Eric sighed knowing just how stubborn his daughter was. It was unfortunately a trait she got from him. Knowing fully well just how smart Wanda was, explaining this decision was going to be a disaster and a headache away. 
Looking past the letter and into his daughter’s eyes, he’s never seen her be this angry. Sure they’ve had arguments, but they’ve subsided ever since she started to attend college. Eric was hoping it was because Wanda was getting older and more mature. 
But as she stood there, eyebrows furrowed with a frown on her face, it felt like she was 16 all over again. Not wanting to beat around the bush, Eric figured to cut to the chase. 
“She’s a threat.” He didn’t like to admit it, but there was hardly anyone on campus that could match his daughter’s intelligence. This was something Eric wanted to keep. But the more he noticed Y/n move up on the Dean’s list, the more he feared Wanda’s spot would be threated. While he was confident in his daughter’s ability, he simply wanted to keep her spot safe. And that meant dealing with Y/n.
“She’s my equal.” All the guilt from the competition finally made sense. And as more things continued to click, the more Wanda stood in horror at the things she said to Y/n. This was all starting to become a nightmare, one that Wanda prayed to go away. But the look on her father’s face pissed her off even more. “If you don’t, I’m transferring. And there’s nothing you can do that will stop me.” 
Giving him no time to respond, Wanda walked out of the office. There was no time to think about her ultimatum, not when all she could think about was Y/n. 
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‘Say something to her, Wanda, for fucks sake.’ It was finally the last day of the semester. Every student was mandated to leave by a certain time. While there was a large crowd of kids with their backpacks and suitcases, all Wanda could focus on was the goodbye happening between Natasha and Y/n.
The brunette had stayed up all night figuring out ways to get Y/n’s scholarship back. At one point, she even considered paying for Y/n’s tuition herself if it meant getting her to come back. But her father would immediately block her allowance if he caught wind of this. 
So far, she hadn’t gotten a response back from him. ‘Maybe he needs more time.’ But time was running out as Natasha helped Y/n with the last box. Percy was already in the driver seat, ready for the long drive back home. 
She could overhear their goodbyes and that Natasha would visit soon to hear the full story. But still, Wanda stood paralyzed, unable to move. ‘What if she doesn’t want to see me? What if I was too mean to her?’ 
And as Y/n got into the car, waving her goodbyes, Wanda stood behind the tree, clutching on to the only thing she had of Y/n. Tears quietly fell down her cheeks, a lingering question on her mind. ‘Did I push you away when you needed me the most?’ 
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irishmammonagenda · 3 days
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"Solomon?" You ask, eyes unblinking like a lizard as you stare at your favourite Rat Bastard. "You know how you're immortal?"
Solomon turns to you in mock shock, "Really? Why I never wouldve guessed."
You deadpan. "It was a serious question."
Solomon smirks his usual evil smirk, which to anyone else observing would look like a pleasant smile. "Yes, and what about me being immortal, MC?"
"Well, did you ever know Merlin?" You tilt your head as Solomon's smile falters for a split second before he fixes it.
"..."
"Solomon?"
"Yes, I knew Merlin."
"Before or after you became a Rat Bastard?" You ask him, eyes trained on his pretty smile. (evil grin)
"Well...I may or may not've been good friends with him..."
"Do you think I could meet him?" You ask, bouncing one of your legs after you sit down on Solomon's workbench.
Solomon moves towards you, something flashing in his eyes for a split second before his hands find their rightful place around your waist. "No."
"Why not?" You pout.
"Because I'm the only famous sorcerer in your life." He states, that something flashing in his eyes once more. Something animalistic. If Solomon was a demon, you were sure his demon form would sprout out.
"What about Maddi?" You raise an eyebrow.
Solomon scoffs. "You hate Maddi. You put on a mask with Michael's face on it, and then tried to drown her in a ditch."
You shrug. "I'm just mad the bitch didn't drown."
"She did damage her oesophagos though." Solomon smiles evilly, actually evilly this time.
"So why can't I meet Merlin. I want his autograph." You bring th conversation back to the topic at hand, your flustered gaze trained to where the Great Sorcerer holds you by the waist possessively.
Solomon scoffs once more, grey eyes narrowed in on you. "And why do you want his autograph?"
"Because he's the greatest sorcerer to ever live? Duh."
Solomon's grip tightens at that. His brows furrow.
"...No he's not." The silver-haired sorcerer replies after an awkward moment of silence.
"Yes he is."
"No he's not." Solomon glares at you, grip tightening once more, it's almost painful. "I can give you my autograph if you yearn for one that badly. End of."
"But-" You pout, eyes flickering with the flame of mischief, wanting to see how far you can take this.
Solomon's eyes snap up and down your body before meeting your gaze, forcefully he moves closer to you, you lean back until he's directly in your face and your back is up against the surface of his workbench.
You feel his hot breath on your ear as he whispers, "The next words out of your mouth better be 'I love you Solomon!' or I'm not hearing them."
Your breath hitches, you suppress a grin, "It's just that-"
"Not hearing it."
"Emrys is just so cool-"
Solomon flicks you on the head for that one. He moves away from your ear so he can look at your face. Grey eyes instinctual and crazed.
"My darling apprentice....you don't want to know where this is headed." The Witty Sorcerer grits out, emphasising the word 'my' like it's an ancient incantation.
You stiffen, you've really done it now. There was no way you could keep teasing your favourite Michelin Star Murderer and come out unscathed.
A dark purple surrounds the sorcerer, are those flames?!
You pout, looking into the crazed feral eyes man who's about to lose control. You'd have to stop being a gremlin and take responsibility.
"Sol...I love you." You say, and you mean it.
And like clockwork, rhe dark purple flamey aura disappears, Solomon's grip loosens on you, he moves a little farther back, allowing you to get up off the surface of the workbench. His usual Rat Bastard smile returns, and the crazy feral look in his eyes diminish, never fully going away.
You raise an eyebrow teasingly, "So that's a no on meeting Merlin?"
Solomon sighs exasperatedly, love ever-present in his expression, "Forget Thirteen, you'll be the death of me."
You laugh, "Back to your Alchemy lesson now?"
Solomon chuckles. "Back to my Alchemy lesson." He nods, taking his hands off of you and walking over to his cauldron.
You follow him like a lost puppy, unaware of the extent of the danger just a few moments ago. Not danger you were in, of course, like Solomon could ever hurt you. But the rest of the realms?....well that's a different story....
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Never wake a sleeping dragon....
Never underestimate the obsession love that Solomon the Wise has for his Darling Apprentice.
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to the anon asking about the large amount of sex-trafficking/rape prompts/stories/blurbs, im going to try and give you a real answer
one major factor, is shame
it's a largely subconscious thing, the fact people's sexual fantasies lean toward this aggressive often dehumanizing scenarios.
but its something that has been observed in people raised with very strict social expectations regarding sexuality often having rape fantasies, because it is a way to indulge in their sexual feelings without having to admit to them, in a way.
i, personally, am fat and queer. and while never stated outright to my face, the fact that small children have on several occasions began crying while looking at me in the supermarket line, I would also have to assume im not that much of a looker either
any show of desires for intimacy, physical or emotional, has been laughed at. people asked me out as a joke when i was in school, my father's side of the family openly lamented my appearance since I was a child because my only real value to them was continuing the family line, and that's not going to happen if I'm unattractive and fat
the fact is I have been told my entire life that me being wanted was impossible, if anybody desired me they would keep it a secret out of fear of ridicule, and anybody who would be open about it must have a specific fetish or be using me
I want to be wanted, hell there are times I'm desperate to get catcalled, because that proves somebody finds me attractive enough to express that. (even if the reality of it is objectifying and rude) the basis of these sorts of fantasies are often rooted in being seen as so desirable, so wanted, that any and all restraint goes out of the window. (you know that romance trope line that's like, "are you sure? because once we start i don't know if i can stop." same idea) the tendency towards trafficking and sexual slavery are also rooted in this, but with the added bit of "see, somebody wants me so bad they will spend money on me, to own me. they will fuck me in a crowded room without shame because their desire for me isn't something they're ashamed about, i am a prize, and the fact they get to fuck me is something they will gloat about."
one of the major appeal of monsters is that they wouldn't be bogged down by our social expectations, or they would have ones of their own. there is no fear regarding being wanted despite my looks, because the things about myself I have been told make me unattractive, are things that they openly and voraciously desire. Also, for the fat folks in the chat, wanting to be picked up and tossed around by your partner is largely something we can't have, (BMI is bullshit but mine is nearly double what it "should" be) you don't have to worry about that if your partner is an 8+ foot tall creature that can suplex a sedan
so while in reality, me being stocky and fat is seen as something that makes me unattractive, a werewolf would look at me and go "ah, yes, broad as a brick wall and twice as thicc, he can take it in a tumble."
can you see where the overlap occurs?
obviously there are some generalizations and assumptions based on my own biases here, and everybody's got their peculiarities, but these are themes I have seen throughout my many years too many online
I also just think monster fucker spaces are a little more open to taboo kinks. like wanting to fuck a werewolf who could kill you at any second is already weirder than most people want to go. thank you for sharing your perspective anon.
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jayflrt · 2 days
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𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝟕𝟖𝟔 39. we can't do this
content warnings: so much pining and yearning and praise and some thigh riding (wow!)
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ONCE CHAEWON HAD LEFT THE ROOM, YOU HEARD A KNOCK AT YOUR DOOR WITHIN MINUTES.
Your heart all but jumped in your chest. It had to be him, and even though you were the one who asked him to come over, you were still nervous to see Jay.
You figured that after your little interaction with him on the airplane, something would eventually happen. After all, you two were in Europe and spent all this time together. There was clear tension between you two, and you had been patiently waiting for it to break all weekend.
It was never this hard; you were fairly confident when it came down to getting a guy's attention. All you had to do was get a little closer and smile a little bigger around them.
But Jay? You felt like you were losing your mind. Not only did he avoid eye contact with you all day, but you found it next to impossible to even talk to him properly. First, it was because he kept running away before you could strike up a conversation, then it was because he made you so flustered that your mouth went dry whenever you wanted to talk.
You thought being featured on his Instagram story was a feat to be celebrated, but that fizzled out as soon as Jay went back to talking to everyone but you.
When you opened the door, he looked as confused as you were with his eyebrows narrowed and his expression stony.
"Hey, what's up?" he greeted, his eyes doing a quick sweep of the room. He was always so observant around you, and why would he be if he didn't reciprocate your feelings? "Are you okay?"
You opened the door wider to let him in before closing it. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanted to see you."
"We could've just gone out for drinks together."
"No, alone," you insisted, sitting down at the edge of your bed and looking up at him. "I wanted us to be alone."
You noticed him swallow thickly before he asked, "Why?"
"I just..." You hesitated before continuing, "I just wanted to make sure that what happened on the plane was real."
He looked more puzzled, if that was even possible. For a second, his reaction made you wonder if you had dreamed about the entire encounter. It was plausible, considering the whole thing felt like a fantasy that ended far too soon.
Jay took a seat next to you and placed his hands on his thighs, staring ahead at the wall as he tried to piece together what you were getting at.
"You mean... Shrek."
So you weren't hallucinating. Never did you think you would feel so much relief over hearing the name Shrek.
"What happened during Shrek, I mean."
"Oh, like—"
"When you had your hands on me," you said gently, taking his hand and placing it right where he had it earlier. The familiar warmth put you at ease while causing a flush of heat to rush to your cheeks simultaneously. Jay didn't move his hand, but he looked down at it and stilled. "Like this."
"What're you—"
"Is this okay?"
It took him a few moments to process that you were fully on top of him, but, eventually, Jay nodded slowly. "Yeah, you're good."
Neither of you said anything for a while, and the seconds felt so unbearably long that you spoke up first, asking, "I'm not going crazy, right? I just thought maybe we feel the same way."
He did that nervous habit of his again where he swallowed hard instead of answering, so you pressed on, "You told me to sit on your lap." You maintained eye contact with Jay as you moved to straddle him, sitting closer to his knees without much care for how your skirt rode up. Keeping your voice as steady as possible, you took his hands and placed them on your thighs again, murmuring, "And then you did this."
He breathed out, "Yeah, I just—"
"But you ignored me all day," you cut across him, and although you felt bad for interjecting so much, the flush of pink across Jay's cheeks was too endearing for you to stop. "I felt like I was invisible to you."
You knew he wanted you, too; it was the longing in his eyes, the way his grip tightened around your thighs, and the way he hung onto every word of yours as if it was the last sound he was hearing. It was unmistakeable, but why did he keep pulling away whenever you toed closer?
"You're not," he said sincerely, gazing into your eyes with an unrivaled intensity. "You're not, I swear. I wasn't... trying to ignore you or anything." For a moment, he stopped talking and just looked down at where you were sitting on top of him. "Actually, I felt like I couldn't stay away from you until I let Heeseung drag me away."
"Really?"
A little hopeful tug of your heart made each concern of yours peel away one-by-one.
"It'd be"—he shook his head in a decidedly frantic manner, all the while keeping his gaze locked with yours—"absolutely impossible to ignore you."
Everything you felt for him, everything you felt in this moment, it all festered and billowed around you until you couldn't keep it under the surface anymore. Your confession had been hanging on your lips for days, and it was somehow easier than breathing to let it slip.
You bit back a small smile. "I like you, Jay."
You couldn't understand why his face crumbled as soon as you said those four words, why the longing in his eyes felt like an endless pit you could drown in. Was it possible that you were misreading the situation? How could that be the case when it looked like his feelings for you were overwhelming him?
His steady breaths grew shallow. "We can't do this, Y/N."
"Why not?"
"You're... you're so... I can't." The desperation that clung to his syllables made his frustration clear.
You frowned. "I'm what?"
"You're perfect. I can't"—he shook his head again—"I just can't give you what you want, or I'll end up giving you all of me, and that can't happen." He leaned forward a little to let his head hang, and you were certain it was to avoid looking you in the eye. "I want you to be happy. I want you to find someone who treats you right."
"You're saying you won't?"
"I can't," he whispered, agonized. He stammered a few times before starting, "Hoon—he'd definitely be upset about this."
By the way he hardly elaborated, you figured there was more reasoning that he simply didn't want to share yet, but you could still understand why Jay was cautious because of Sunghoon. Not only had you two broken up around three months ago, but now Jay was close with your ex-boyfriend. Part of you felt a little worried about how starting something with Jay would affect the group dynamic, too, but you knew that pretending like nothing was going on would make you feel worse.
You slid up further onto his lap, hooking your arms around his shoulders. Jay drew in a sharp breath by your sudden action, but he squeezed your thighs all the same. The flutters in your stomach from before had now become arousal pooling between your legs. You pressed your lips together and looked up at him again; hunger dawned in his eyes, and you could almost feel the way he was ravaging you with a single look.
"We could keep it a secret," you offered shyly.
"I'm sorry, it's impossible," he replied, sighing. His voice was hardly loud enough for you to hear. "I'm so sorry."
You couldn't help your emotions from pouring out when you squeaked out, "Am I really that bad?"
"No—no, never." He nearly shouted the words, his eyes burning with wicked desire. "I just promised myself I wouldn't do anything to you."
"But why?"
"You deserve better, Y/N. I won't let myself ruin you."
You hated hearing that phrase. Despite the pleasant goosebumps that prickled your skin at the thought of him ruining you, you couldn't understand why Jay thought so lowly of himself. He wasn't supposed to decide whether he was better for you or not, and you wished he could see himself the way you saw him—someone who gathered and fixed all of the stars in your sky.
"But I want you to ruin—oh." Your breath hitched upon the jolt of pleasure that left heat blooming under your skin. Whether intentional or unintentional, Jay had gripped your thighs so hard that he ended up pulling you up higher onto his legs, and the friction against your cunt left you needing more. "Jay, you—"
"Don't say that," he warned sternly, and when you looked up at him again, he looked as though he was fighting an addiction that he hadn't quite slipped into yet. And then his expression was pained, and how mad he was for you was as clear as day. "I've forced myself to stay away from you every single day, and my emotions always betray me. Just let me have this, at least. Let me stop feeling like I'm out of my mind."
And then his eyes softened, and he brushed away a loose strand of your hair. "If my circumstances were different, I'd have agreed in a heartbeat."
His words should have made your heart swell (and they did, to an extent), but you felt a strange sadness lingering in your chest. It didn't seem like he was going to elaborate on his reasoning, but you felt indubitably unfulfilled. You didn't understand, and he wouldn't let you understand.
Perhaps it was the fact that you had never been turned down like this, or you couldn't fathom getting this far and still being pushed away, or a rather unfortunate combination of both, but you couldn't stop yourself from tearing up. Even though he had been so, so kind, his words were like a dagger in your gut.
"It's okay," you warbled out, and before you could furiously wipe at the stray tear streaming down your cheek, Jay got to it first with a gentle, steady thumb. "I kind of expected it."
This time, he frowned. "You did? Why?"
"This is the first time I've liked someone like this... tried for them, you know. It's just hard for me to believe that you'd ever want me the way I want you."
Your words seemed to ignite something in Jay for the gentle flicker in his eyes was replaced with a blazing fire that only burned hotter when his eyes narrowed to slits. Your breath was caught in your throat when you felt the pads of his fingers press into your skin with a bruising grip.
The way he looked at you made you feel like you had burst into flames, too.
You weren't sure how long Jay had harbored such feelings for you, but they all came out at once in a fury. It was as if he pushed it deep inside, allowed it to simmer for months before it grew too wild to be contained. It was only a matter of time before everything came up to the surface, and now, it was on display.
"You think I don't want you?" He nearly barked out a laugh, disbelief thick in his voice. He let his head drop onto your shoulder, breathing out a few more baffled laughs before you felt his hot breath fan your skin. "You have no idea what you do to me. God, Y/N, you consume my every thought—day and night." When he raised his head again, there was a piercing intensity in his dark eyes. "I punched Hoon for you. I punched him 'cause he hurt you." He closed his eyes and sucked in a sharp breath that seemed to shake his entire body. "I'm not a violent person by any means. I just couldn't stand hearing how he treated you."
Your lower lip was caught between your teeth. You could hardly believe you were hearing his unfiltered emotions like this, but you didn't want him to stop. You were only afraid that he would snap out of it soon and push you away again, so the least you could do was tell him a secret of your own.
"I have something to admit, too," you started. "Back in Seattle, I might have lied about the hotel availability because I was having so much fun." You paused to gauge his reaction, and you were pleasantly surprised that there was no trace of anger in his face; his eyes simply widened a fraction. "I was also freaking out about us sleeping in the same bed, but... it's not like I disliked it."
Jay went silent again, and you peered up at him curiously, waiting for a reaction. Eventually, he sighed heavily and pulled you an inch closer to his body, letting you chase that addictive friction for a split second.
"Please, Jay," you couldn't help but whimper, which, in turn, caused him to clench his jaw. "Don't make me feel good if you're not gonna keep going."
He shifted, cursing under his breath. "I can't, Y/N, I can't..." He then removed his hands to rub his face, aggravated. "I can't do this to you."
But then you saw his bulge strain against his pants, right in front of the apex of your legs—so close that you could simply move forward so that your cunt was flush against it. Jay didn't mention his boner at all, but he followed your gaze and ended up blushing scarlet under the dim light.
"Just ignore that," he muttered quickly. "I can take care of it myself."
"Are you sure?" You pouted. With Sunghoon, you always got him off first before he touched you; there were only few exceptions to this, but it was basically a ritual for you to pleasure him before he took care of you. "You're gonna go back to your room like that?"
Jay pressed his lips together in a thin line. "I'll figure it out, but are you gonna be, uh, okay?"
"I can manage just fine; I've handled it myself plenty of times."
It caught you by surprise, but those were apparently the words that drove Jay to the brink of madness; you stretched him thinner and thinner until he had finally snapped right then and there.
His voice was pitched dangerously low when he asked, "Are you serious?"
"Yeah? I thought that was normal."
"No fucking way." Jay scoffed. He shook his head in dismay. "Sunghoon's an idiot."
Careful not to push his buttons, you mumbled, "But... aren't you doing the same thing, too?"
He gave you a long, hard look. The weight of his gaze almost made you want to wither away on the spot. You trapped him with that one, and he seemed to be very aware of this fact when you heard him let out a half-frustrated, half-tired groan.
You quickly added, "Sorry, I didn't mean—"
"One condition," he interrupted. "I'll help you, but you're not allowed to touch me." He had a firm grip on your thighs again. "I'm not moving my hands, either."
Your heart stopped.
"Please."
That ache between your legs grew more desperate, and you felt like electric currents were running under your skin just by the way he held you. Truthfully, you did feel yourself deflate a little when he set down the rule that you weren't allowed to touch him, but then Jay sat against the headboard and pulled you back onto his lap with his eyes fixed on yours, and you couldn't remember anything anymore.
He was truly committed to only pleasuring you; even though his cock looked painfully hard through the fabric, Jay was adamant about keeping you on his thigh. His leg muscles were strong, you gathered, as he guided your hips down to grind against his thigh in torturous circles.
Immediately, you were dizzy with pleasure. Each motion ended with a little pressure against your clit that sent shocks of bliss throughout your body. He flexed his muscle enough for you to whine from the stimulation.
"F-fuck, just like that."
"Wow," Jay got out in a rush, his voice raspy and fervent, relishing the way you were bouncing on his thigh with occasional whimpers and moans falling from your lips. "You're perfect, Y/N. Everything I've ever dreamt of and more."
And when he called out your name, it felt like he was worshipping you, like your name was a prayer that he needed to chant to preserve some semblance of sanity. Jay was using all his might to suppress the all-consuming desire that threatened to take over every rational decision he had made so far.
Not that this was a rational decision in the slightest.
Not being able to hold onto him was the worst punishment you could've gotten. You were drawn to him, as if you were magnetized, but he put up a very clear boundary that you wouldn't dare push. You had already gotten this far, and you weren't going to push your luck any further—not when you were already seeing white flashes in your vision as he continued his rhythmic motion of helping you ride his thigh.
Maybe it was because you hadn't been taken care of in months, or maybe it was because Jay had tapped into some hidden talent at getting you off, but your climax crept up upon you unexpectedly. One minute your eyes were locked with Jay's as you ground your hips into his thigh, and the next you were arching your back and gripping the sheets underneath for leverage as your orgasm rushed over you.
You threw your head back as you succumbed to the current of pleasure that ripped through you. When you opened your eyes again, Jay was staring at you like he wanted to kiss you, and you were so sure he would for a moment. You leaned up, lips barely grazing his before he pulled back with a groan and dug his fingers firmly into your thighs.
Jay didn't stop even as you gasped and moaned his name throughout your orgasm. (It did seem to rile him up a little more, though.) He only tightened his grip so that he could continue the same, ancient rhythm that ended up driving you to the edge of your second orgasm.
"Oh my god," you gushed out, finally losing your balance and using your shaky arms to keep you upright.
Jay finally slowed down until he was sure you had fruitfully ridden out your orgasm. You were a fucked-out, panting mess by the end of it, and you craved nothing more than for Jay to pull you into his arms and show you just how much he could make love to you.
If he could make you feel that good by only holding your thighs, then you would surely be ruined if you two went further.
But, to your dismay, he gently moved you off of him and sat at the edge of the bed, letting out a soft sigh and staring down at the carpet.
"Are you leaving?" you asked once you regained your composure, slightly hopeful that he wouldn't.
"I should." He stood up and looked down at you tenderly, almost reaching down to fix your hair but stopping himself when he was inches away. "I really would spend the night if I could, I swear."
"I believe you," you said, "but we're gonna talk about this soon, right? I don't think I can just pretend this didn't happen."
Jay pondered for a moment before saying, "Yeah—just not right now."
"Okay," you breathed out, relieved. Blood rushed to your cheeks again. "Thank you."
He only blushed in response, ducking his head to hide how flustered he was.
"Are you going back to your room now?" you asked.
Jay nodded, but the two of you stayed where you were for a moment, and you were hoping he'd give you something—a hug or a kiss—before he left. He went with the former, which you had no complaints about, and squeezed you into a tight hug that you only had a few seconds to reciprocate before he pulled away.
His eyes lingered on your lips for a moment too long. His searing look left you with a curl of desire seizing you so viciously that you were certain you would feel empty for the rest of the night.
"Sleep well, Y/N."
You managed a smile for him, even though you oh-so-badly wanted him to stay. "Goodnight, Jay."
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SUMMARY ▸ private investigator jay park just wants to complete his mission quietly and move on with his life. you, his new assignment who keeps consuming his thoughts, don't make that very easy for him.
TAG LIST ▸ @zdgx1 @smouches @heesdazed @teawithbucky @leep0ems @peachpie4you @niniissus @kgneptun @jaeyunluvr @zerasari @sophiko22 @iselltulips @hoondiors @baekhyunstruly @jays-property @woninluv @heerinnie @fakeuwus @yizhoutv @theothernads @y4wnjunz @dammit-jjk @en-happiness @mari-oclock @soonyoungblr @jakeslvt @taetaenic @jebetwo @fairysungx @hsgwrld @shmooooo @ineedsomezzz @mrowww @enha-stars @seongclb @lockburn-castle @alyssajavenss @enczen @calumsfringe @w3bqrl @luvyev @uhsakusa @luvnicho @wildflowermooon @navsnct @hooniesuniverse @enhalov @enhypens-baby @isawritesss
AUTHOR'S NOTE ▸ if ur reading this chapter and thinking omg jay's so screwed 😭 ur so right but this is crucial to the plot so let me cook
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daydreaming-nerd · 2 days
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The Prophecy (Lucien Vanserra x Rhys! Sister)/(Azriel x Rhys! Sister) Part 3 (Azriel's Version)
Part One , Part 2
AN: "Majesty, Palo is exhausted. Because Majesty only Palo can take this (angst) and this (groveling) and give you...a masterpiece."
No fr guys I put my whole puss into this plz tell me if you liked it
check out my masterlist
Summary: The only thing worse than having Azriel not know about the bond is watching him and Elain carry on like she doesn’t have a mate as well. Lucien and you have been long time friends but things change after one fateful starfall celebration. It’s not wrong if both of your mates don’t want you right? 
Warnings: angst, fluff like so much fluff, no editing (I'm so tired omg)
Word count: 9,370
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We arrived in the house in silence, the only thing to fill the void was the crackling of the enchanted fire that always sprang to life whenever I walked through the door. My eyes were fixed on the floorboards, studying every grain of wood as I put together what had just happened. 
I had told Azriel about the bond, and I did it in anger. I had imagined telling him a million different ways over the past 400 years but never did imagine doing it out of spite. I was just so angry with Elain and her insufferable entitlement that had me seeing red. If anyone should act in such a manner, it should be me, I was a princess after all. 
I was furious with Elain there was no doubt about that, but the voice that kept echoing in my mind was Azriel’s. How he yelled at me. I had known him my whole life and I had never once been afraid of him, until today. 
As if he was tired of the silence, Lucien brushed his hand under my chin bringing my gaze to his, it wasn’t until then that I realized I was crying. 
“Are you okay?” he asked, brows furrowing at my tear stained cheeks. 
“Yeah,” I laughed him off, wiping the water from my face. 
“I’m sorry I interfered like that, I wasn’t sure if you wanted to speak to him or if you wanted me to kick his ass. But he seemed mad and I wouldn’t stand for him yelling at you.” Lucien apologized leaning against the back of the couch a good three feet away sensing I needed some space. 
“I suppose that I wasn’t sure what I wanted either,” I sigh leaning against the doorframe. “Thank you for stepping in. I think it was for the best.” 
“Of course, I’ll always be there for you,” Lucien nods before resuming his staredown with the floor, probably trying to make sense of everything just like I was. “Az seemed…concerned for you. I think the bond snapped for him.” 
“It did,” I say, running my hand over my chest, as if I could touch the faint glow of the bond that now sat in my chest. “It clicked the moment he saw us in the kitchen.”
“Are you happy it clicked?” he asked, once again asking all the questions I truly didn’t have an answer for, at least not yet. 
“I-I’m not sure.” I say honestly, knowing I didn’t need to hide my true feelings from Lu. “I’ve pictured him finding out a million ways, but over the last couple years I’ve kind of given up on the whole endeavor. I felt like I made it clear that I liked him, and he only met me with complaints about other women. First Mor and then Elain.” 
“Maybe he’s changed,” Lucien pointed out. 
“Even if he had it’s not because he loves me.” I murmured sadly. “You heard him in there. He only wants me because he feels entitled to me. He never once acted like he cared about me beyond being his best friend's little sister.” 
“I suppose you’re right, it’s hard to forgive 400 years of cruel behavior,” Lucien muttered, still staring at that little spot on the floor. 
I strode across the room and leaned against the couch with him. I wanted to say something, anything to break the silence. But it was as if all the air had been sucked from the room in one foul swoop. I had just let out a 400 year old secret and for the first time ever, our mates seemed to give a damn about us. I look to Lucien who is still processing everything and I recall how Elain was so upset to see her mate with another female.
“Elain…” I started, wanting to tread carefully. “She seemed pretty upset,” I said, only stating the obvious. 
Lucien chuckled, “Yeah, I think that’s the first time she’s ever called me her mate.” 
“And how do you feel about that?” I ask wanting to give him the same room to speak that he gave me. I knew if he didn’t feel like sharing he wouldn’t, Lucien was no pushover. 
“I feel strangely happy,” he says and for the first time since we got back his lip curls into a half smile. “I think that she might be willing to give me a chance.” 
My heart warms at the idea of Lucien finally getting to have a chance with his true mate, “I’m really happy for you Lu,” I smile, patting his hand that sat on the back of the couch. 
He snaps out of his trance, “that’s not to say that you’re not- you’re a wonderful woman y/n-” he rambles. 
“Hey, HEY!” I shout getting his attention. “I’m happy for you Lucien. You deserve this,” I laugh at his attempt to not hurt my feelings. 
“Thank you y/n,” he smiles, grabbing my hands and squeezing them. 
“What do we do now though,” I sigh looking at his family ring on my finger. 
His eyes flit to the ring as well as his thumb brushes over it, “We continue on as normal, we can push back the wedding. I’m not confident in what Elain wants from me at this point and you clearly are at odds with Azriel. If things don’t work out…” he trails off thinking about hsi next words. “If things don’t work out I would still be honored to have you as my wife. I still feel like we could make eachother happy.” he says earnestly. 
I look into his eyes of russet and gold and see that he truly means every word, “Okay,” I nod my voice barely above a whisper. 
“Okay,” he agrees, keeping his voice down as well. “Shall we head to bed?” he asks. 
“We shall,” I laugh, following him up the stairs. 
That night we didn’t make love, we cuddled as normal though, but somehow even that felt wrong, now that the bond I prayed over for so long hummed within my chest.
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 While the little High Lord in training was typically quite docile, he had just learned to crawl and had begun flapping his little wings, which meant trouble was becoming the new normal. Which is exactly what had happened today…
“Nyx no!” I shouted as he reached for a heavy book on one of the bookshelves, his tiny wings helping him to gain the extra inch or two of ground he needed. 
I grabbed him from underneath his shoulders and brought him into my arms, bouncing him on my hip as his eyes caught the shiny necklace I was wearing. His little hands grabbed at it and I figured it was better than a vase or another heavy book. 
“Just wait till he can actually fly,” Lucien chuckled, coming up behind me.
“That won’t be for quite a while thankfully,” I laugh, bouncing the babe up and down.
“Are you so sure about that? Cassian seems to already be giving him lessons.” he points out. 
“I don’t even want to think about a flying toddler,” I scoff and Lucien chuckles behind me. 
 He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and I could feel his lips curling into a smile.“You’re going to be a great mother one day” he admitted. 
“I’ve always wanted children,” I said and a beat of silence passed until I decided to be bold. “Lu, do you think we could ever have children?” I ask, afraid to turn around and possibly see a wary look on his face.
I felt Lucien’s chuckle reverberate behind me, “Of course, I’ve always been fond of children myself,” he laughed. 
I whipped around with Nyx to search his eyes for a hint of uncertainty, but he seemed happy about the idea, “Really?” I asked in disbelief. 
“Of course,” he assured me. 
“I want a million just like little Nyx here,” I smile looking at the babe in my arms. 
“Minus the wings of course,” Lucien laughs behind me and I pause. 
My entire life I had always pictured my children with wings. Small, delicate little things that I would ‘ooo’ and ‘ahhh’ over.  I remembered seeing the Illyrian children in Windhaven growing up, I was always so happy when mothers would let me hold their babies, their wings so adorably small. I looked forward to having winged children of my own, I always pictured them scaling Azriel when they were little like Nyx, and as they got older I would watch as Az taught them to fly.
“What is it my dear?” Lucien asked, breaking me out of my trance. 
“Oh it’s nothing, it’s just that when I pictured my children I always figured they would have wings,” I say, pressing a kiss to Nyx’s temple. 
As if summoned, Azriel walked in, Rhys and Feyre in tow, signaling that their meeting was over. His eyes flitted to me, no doubt having heard what I had said. Lucien’s hand tightened on my hip.
Feyre’s eyes sparkled at the sight of her son and Rhys eyes sparkled at the sight of Feyre taking their babe from my arms. I reluctantly gave Nyx back, already missing being able to pretend he was my own. 
“He was a little angel,” I report to Feyre.
“If by angel you mean hellion,” Lucien chuckles behind me. 
“I would expect nothing less from a child raised by this family,” Rhys laughed, wrapping one arm around Feyre and brushing a hand against his son’s cherub cheeks. 
A silence rolled over the room as we all watched the little family reunite. I couldn’t help but flit my eyes to Azriel, who looked at them with a grin and a longing in his eyes. His eyes find me and I don’t dare look away. 
“Can we talk?” Azriel asked timidly, taking a step away from the doorway he leaned against. Feyre and Rhys take out of the room, no doubt feeling the change in the atmosphere.  
I searched his eyes for a hint of aggression but all I found was remorse, “Yes we may,” I say quietly.
Lucien releases his grip on my hip as I follow Azriel into Rhysand’s study and close the door behind me with a resolute click signaling that I was locked in here with him. Az takes up residence by Rhys’ desk, leaning against it like some sort of tortured man. I couldn’t help but notice he was still in his fighting leathers, his wings tucked in tight and his knuckles perched over his lips, like he was contemplating what to say. Even now, when he was at his most vulnerable, he was so beautiful. 
“I’m sorry for the way I acted last night. I yelled at you and I shouldn’t have,” he says fidgeting a bit. “Its just… it’s just that I was so pissed when I found him with his hands all over you and you just seemed so happy.” 
He sighs running a hand through his hair staring at the ground, still unable to meet my eyes. 
“I think that’s what bothered me the most,” he continues. “You seemed…happy.”
“You were upset because I was happy?” I scoff furrowing my brows at him, the fucking gall of this male. 
“No, no! Gods y/n,” he corrects me, running his hands down his face clearly upset with himself. “I think I was upset because I wasn’t the one making you happy.” he finally says and I can hear the vulnerability in his voice. 
I’m completely taken back by his words, at the fact that he admitted that he wanted to be the one to make me happy like that. The way Lucien did. It didn’t make any sense, given the fact that he never showed me in the last 400 years. 
“That’s funny coming from a male who’s been complaining to me about the females he’s been in love with for the past 400 years.” I deadpan, crossing my arms. 
“Is that how long you’ve known? 400 years?” he asked me, voice rising a bit. 
I nod, “I knew the night you danced with me on solistance in the Hewn City all those years ago,” I confess. 
“Fuck y/n,” he groans running his hands down his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 
“Because you started panting after Mor and the second you gave up on her in walked Elain!” I shouted, it was the most obvious thing ever as to why I didn’t tell him. 
“You had to know that you were first,” he says, snapping his head up to meet mine, pleading in those hazel eyes. 
I gave him a blank stare not knowing what he was talking about. 
“Please tell me you know you were the first, before Mor, before Elain, I was practically on my knees for you,” he confessed. 
Once again I’m left speechless. Could it be true? That he had wanted me before I even knew about the bond? 
I shook my head, even if it was true he was speaking in past tense. I didn’t want him to be my mate because he felt like he had to be, I wanted him to love me, truly love me. I wanted him to choose me.
“I had no idea,” I admit feeling a bit of shame. “But that doesn’t matter anymore, it’s all in the past. I’m not mad at you Azriel.” 
“Thank the cauldron,” he breathes, crossing the room to cup my face.
I place my  hands on his wrists and pull them away from me, “Az I think that you should be with Elain,” I say, stepping back from him. 
“What? No.” he shakes his head and I take another step back.
“You clearly love her and she loves you, the cauldron made a mistake by making us mates, it's as simple as that,” I say trying to hide my tears.
I loved Az, a part of me always would, but I wouldn’t be his consolation prize just because the cauldron fucked up and made me his mate instead of Elain. I couldn’t live with that. 
“No don’t say that, please don’t say that,” Az pleads, his voice softening. 
“I’m sorry Azriel but I won’t be your consolation prize,” I say before grabbing the door handle and walking out into the living room where Lucien was. 
Azriel goes to say more until he hears the hitch in my breath. There, before me, Lucien is tucking a stray hair out of Elain’s face and placing a kiss on her knuckles. A sweet gesture, one I’ve probably read about a thousand times in my romance novels. Lucien’s eyes flit to mine, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen him so happy. 
“We’re going to give it a shot,” he smiles happily, putting an arm around Elain. 
“Really?” I ask looking to Elain who smiles brightly. 
“Yeah we are,” she says smiling up at Lucien. 
“Oh I’m so happy for you two,” I cheer before engulfing them both in a hug. 
“Congrats you guys,” Azriel mutters from behind me, seemingly abandoning whatever he was going to say to me in favor of praising his friends. 
Lucien chuckles at my excitement, “Don’t get too excited, we’re going to have to move my stuff out of your place today, I think it’s time I move back into the townhouse,” he smiled. 
“Well what are we waiting for? Let’s get started!” I cheer, grabbing his hands to winnow us away. 
In reality I wasn’t excited about the idea of moving, and much less excited about the idea of my little townhouse being empty again. But I needed to get away from Azriel. 
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One week later:
After the all day affair of moving Lucien’s accumulated stuff out of my house and in the townhouse I was back to loving alone. Which at first wasn’t terrible. I was content to read my book and cook for myself when necessary. But after about a week I began to miss the food Lucien would make, or having someone to lie next to. It was a strange feeling, it felt like a breakup, but I wasn’t sad. I missed having another heartbeat in the house, not Lucien himself. 
After a week of getting my affairs in order my brother finally asked me for some help and I was thankful for the distraction. All week I had been in my own head about all that had happened, with Lu and Elain, with me and Az. I needed a break to think of something else. 
That’s how I found myself slipping on an old day court dress and getting ready to winnow to see Helion, an old friend of mine. I was leaving the house and locking the door when I ran smack into a large chest I screamed being taken off guard. 
“Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you,” a familiar voice apologized, I turn to find Azriel standing before me. 
“It’s okay, I should’ve been paying more attention,” I chuckle awkwardly. I hadn’t heard from the spymaster in a week, why would he come to talk to me now?    
Azriel’s eyes furrow from where they tower over me, “Why are you dressed for the Day Court?” he inquires. 
“Oh well,” I look down at the swaths of white fabric that cascaded down my body, suddenly feeling a bit exposed from off the shoulder dress. “Rhys wants me to go and schmooze Helion a little bit. Something about wanting to get him to agree to better trade deals.” I laugh remembering how my brother agonized over it the other day. 
“So he wants you to go and flirt with Helion?” Az cocks an eyebrow at me. 
“Well Helion and I go way back, and he’s always been…well keen on me.” I say honestly and I watch as Az bristles just a bit. I can’t even count the number of times the High Lord as tired to get Cassian and I in his bed
“I’ll give Rhys one thing he sure is ruthless,” Azriel chuckles trying to play off his nerves. 
“Is there something I can do for you?” I ask, still wondering why he’s here, at my doorstep. 
“Oh uh, no,” Azriel stutters. “Well actually I was walking by and I saw this and I thought of you.” he says pulling out a white rose. It looked like he had plucked it right off the bush down the street. “I thought you should have it.” he finished. 
I take the rose from his hand and notice that the thorns have all been cut off. I eye Truth Teller strapped at his side and the lingering thorn that was still stuck on its sharp blade. 
“That was very thoughtful of you Az thank you,” I tell him sweetly, taken back by his gesture. 
“You’re welcome,” he says, seemingly relaxing at my acceptance of his gift. 
I check my watch, “Well I really do have to go, Helion is waiting for me,” I wince moving past him on the stairs so I can get past the words my brother has on my place. 
“Yes of course,” Az says following me down the steps and out the wrought iron fence. “Do you need a ride?” 
“I’m okay, I can winnow,” I chuckle, closing the gate behind me. 
“Well I guess I’ll see you later then,” Azriel voices with a hint of a sigh. 
“Yeah I’m sure you will,” I reply before winnowing into Helion’s mansion. 
How could Az be so calm about all this? It was like he was trying to force himself to have feelings for me, figuring he better learn to love me now that he’s shackled to me for eternity. Part of me wondered if Rhys had given him a firm talking to and convinced him to attempt to like me.
“There she is,” Helion mused from the top of the stairs coming down the stairs dressed in his usual attire. Part of me hated that I found him attractive, in another life, if he wasn’t so promiscuous, I might’ve seen myself standing by his side. 
“Helion,” I smile, pulling him in for a hug. 
When we pull away his hands linger at my waist and his eyes look at the rose in my hand. “What’s this?” he asks plucking the rose from my hand. 
I think about the encounter with Azriel, how forced it all felt.
“It’s nothing,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders. 
Helion tosses the flower aside before throwing his arm over my shoulder and leading me inside, “So, your brother has sent you to convince me to agree to his new trade agreements.” he smirks.
“He’s done nothing of the sort, I came to visit an old friend of my own accord,” I tease, knowing Helion isn’t as daft as Rhys makes him out to be. 
“We’ll see about that new treaty after some wine, and tell your brother that next time he wants to use you against me as leverage he should just send you naked,” Helion chuckles. 
I erupt in laughter, slapping his arm as he leads us to a white couch with a bottle of wine sitting on the coffee table. 
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Three days later after successfully getting Helion to agree to a new trade treaty I found myself sitting in my living room with a glass of wine enjoying the fruits of my labors. As soon as I told Rhys about the High Lord of Day’s cooperation he sent me one of his finest bottles of wine as a thank you. Not that I required any thanks, I enjoyed spending time with Helion. 
My silence was interrupted by my door opening and closing. I just about jumped out of my skin, the only one who had the key to the place was Lucien and he had given it back a long time ago. My heart pounded as I stood from the couch in my nightgown and robe. I had turned in for the night and certainly wasn’t expecting visitors. I lift my romance novel over my head and step around he couch ready to swing when I see Azriel locking the door behind him quietly. 
“Azriel you scared the hell out of me,” I sigh, lowering the book. 
He turns from the door looking me up and down taking in my casual attire hungrily. “I’m sorry I guess I’m just used to walking right in, I wanted to give you these,” he says holding out a large bouquet of white roses, exactly like the kind he gave me the other day.”
“Thank you Az, they’re beautiful,” I say wearily, taking them from his scarred hands. “I’ll uh- I’ll just put them in water,” I tell him, padding into the kitchen to grab a vase and fill it. 
“I thought since you liked the other one I gave you that you might like those ones too,” he says walking into the kitchen and leaning in my doorway. 
I place the two dozen roses in a vase,“Well I appreciate them, it’s been a while since I’ve had fresh flowers in the house,” I divulge to him, remembering how Lucien used to bring them home all the time. He would always ask for Elain to make him a bouquet, his little way of speaking to her in a way that didn’t make her uncomfortable. The thought had me thinking of how Lucien and Elain were probably sitting at a nice dinner right now, had me questioning why the fuck Azriel was here. 
A silence fills the room as Azriel sits admiring either me or the flowers, from where I’m standing it could be either or. I walk around the kitchen island to test the theory and sure enough his eyes follow me as I lean my back against the side closer to him.  A wave of embarrassment slips over me. Did Rhys ask him to bring more flowers again? Was I really that pathetic? 
“Az why are you doing this?” I ask, gesturing to the flowers behind me. 
Azriel straightens taking a tentative step towards me, “Because I want what Elain and Lucien have. I want you to give me a chance to be a good mate,” he says softly. 
I look to the wooden floors below me, my bare feet messing with a loose floorboard, “You don’t have to do this Azriel. If Rhys sent you I’ll just cover for you and say you came.” I say not daring to look at him. 
“I’m not here because of Rhys, I’m here because I want to see you,” he implored and I heard his feet shuffle closer. 
“I’m still not your consolation prize just because Lucien and Elain are doing well. I won’t do that to myself,” I say, continuing to mess with the loose floorboard. 
“You’re not my consolation prize y/n, you’re my mate.” Azriel states, his voice becoming more urgent causing me to tighten my arms around myself ever so slightly. 
His boots come into my line of sight and suddenly he’s titling my chin up to meet his pleading gaze. I’m suddenly all too aware of how underdressed I was. There was a time when I would’ve killed for this. But now? I won’t let myself be hurt again.
“Y/n please-” 
“Azriel I’m at peace,” I snap, cutting him off and looking down at our feet once again even though his hand still rested under my chin. “For the first time in 400 years I’m at peace. I have loved, and pined, and thrown myself at your feet for 400 years, and I am finally happy in my exile. So forgive me if I’m hesitant to give that up so quickly because you all of the sudden want a mate.” I bit out.
His shadows dance around my hands and I move my fingers out of their grasp, like their cold kiss was burning me.I wait for him to say something back, for him to breathe wrong, yell at me or leave but he doesn’t move. I let my eyes flit up to his, and I find him staring down at me, like he’s been waiting for me to look at him this whole time. 
“I’m not going to give up,” he states, if he was sad or upset by my previous words he doesn’t show it. 
I sigh, tossing my head back, “Az please,” I beg. 
“No I’m serious, I’m not giving up on you, on us,” he maintained steadfastly, his hands not leaving my cheek as he steps even closer to me and my back hits the cool granite behind me. 
“Azriel I think you should go,” I grit out, the second my body stiffens under his he steps back giving me my space. 
“Alright I’ll go,” he says, taking a step back.
I follow him to the door and hold it open as he steps out into the cool night air that has me wrapping my silk robe around me tighter, as if it was helping anything anyways. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he assures me before shooting off into the sky. 
“I really wish you wouldn’t!” I shout into the air after him before slamming the door and locking it. 
I take a deep breath once I’m seated on my couch again, trying to salvage any sort of peace I might still have. But that tranquility was disappearing in my hands the more I chased it. 
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The following day I head to Rhys’ house to talk over the new adjustments in the Day Court trade agreements. It was supposed to be easy enough, but as things got more and more complex it ended up being an all day thing. By the time I walked up the steps to my own townhouse I was exhausted and starving. I wasn’t looking forward to bread for dinner as I had no time to go to the market today. 
I kicked open the door and locked it behind me, the smell of fresh tomatoes and basil wafted through the air causing me to pause in my tracks. Was Lucien here? Had him and Elain gotten in a fight or something?
“Ah shit!” I heard a male cuss followed by the searing of liquid on a burner. 
I curiously walk around the corner of the kitchen where I’m greeted with the sight of Azriel, standing in my apron, reading my cookbook and stirring some sort of sauce. His shadows were helping him turn the pages of the book. I see the spilled sauce on the burner that was the cause of his profanity just moments ago. 
“There you are,” he smirked, his eyes flitting up to mine before reading the book again. 
“Az what are you doing here?” I ask, setting my bag down on the table. 
“Making you dinner,” he said, gesturing to the numerous used pans and utensils lying around my once clean kitchen. 
I walk over to inspect what he’s cooking. Fresh herb crusted chicken cooks in the pan next to him while he stirs a red sauce. In the sink is cooked pasta sitting next to freshly sauteed green beans. I inhale the smell of the food deeply and I can’t help but feel myself salivate a little, it smells delicious. 
“You always dog ear the recipes you want to try but you never make them for fear of not liking them,” he says nonchalantly as he prods at the chicken. 
I look down at the cookbook he’s reading, sure enough the recipe he’s making has a bent corner. I had been itching to try it but had never found the time. 
“If you end up not liking it there’s take out from Rita’s in the ice box,” he said using the spoon to point to the ice box in the corner of the room.
I look up to fully inspect him. This all feels like a ridiculous practical joke. If someone had told me that my spymaster would be cooking me dinner I would’ve laughed in their face. Upon further inspection I realize he’s shirtless, save for my apron he’s wearing. 
“Was the half nudity necessary?” I cock an eyebrow leaning against the counter. 
Azriel barked out a laugh, “It took me a while to find the apron, I had gotten tomato juice on my shirt when I started chopping them up for the sauce so I took it off and washed it,” he explained the corner of his mouth turning up in a smirk. “Plus I figured the whole shirtless bit might win me more brownie points with you.” 
I rolled my eyes at his cockiness, I didn’t dare let him know how right he was. 
He laughed at my reaction, “Why don’t you go sit down, dinner’s almost ready.” he said gesturing to the couch. 
I shrugged my shoulders and padded my way over to my favorite reading spot. The one he found me in yesterday. I plop down on the velvet sofa and there in front of me on the coffee table, my book has been left open to the place I bookmarked and a glass of wine sits for me. I raise an eyebrow but decide to just roll with it, I pick up the book and sip on the wine, becoming engrossed with the story.
A few minutes later I feel the cold begin to bite at my toes. I look around for a blanket and see that the nearest one is across the room. I curse at the idea of having to move, but before I can even set my book down one of Azriel’s shadows is scurrying across the room to retrieve the knitted blanket for me. The wisp of darkness arranges the blanket neatly over my legs, tucking me in like a mother would her child.  I can’t help but laugh at the care the little thing is putting into the job. 
Azriel’s shadows looking out for me was nothing new, the second the bond clicked for me they tended to stay near me. Picking up pens and silverware I dropped on the floor and always twirling around my hair and wrists. There were even times they would try to drag Az near me, like on starfall and solstice, nights I looked especially beautiful. But he would always curse and wave them off until they left him alone. 
The little shadow perched itself on my shoulder as if it too wanted to read my book. I could sense it was trying to anticipate any other small need I might have. 
“You know he might be insufferable but you guys are pretty great,” I laugh looking at the curious being. 
In response the shadow boops itself on my nose as if it was giving me a kiss. 
“Don’t tell them that or they’ll get a big head,” Azriel murmurs behind me where he’s leaning against the doorway between the living room and the kitchen, still shirtless and wearing that damned apron.
“In that case I’ll be sure to praise them more often, they’re little angels,” I smile as the tendril of darkness dances around my collar. 
Azriel lets out a small chuckle behind me, “Dinner is ready,” he tells me before disappearing into the kitchen once more. 
I follow him as the small shadow frantically pulls at my wrist towards the table, as if it’s eager for me to see what it helped its master cook. When I walk into the darkened kitchen and find that Az has set the table not only with our dinner but with candles and another bouquet. This time it’s an arrangement of jasmine, no doubt from the florist down the street. 
I sit down and inhale the heavenly scent of the white flowers and hum in delight. Azriel comes in with a bottle of wine and two glasses, pouring us each a bit. He sees me admiring the flowers and smiles. 
“Jasmine, like your perfume,” he says, putting down the bottle and taking his seat next to me. 
I smile and look down at the plate before me. It looks delicious, the pasta is fragrant with basil, the chicken is cooked to perfection and the green beans are vibrant and green. I lift my fork and dig into the past first. The moment it hits my tongue the flavor melts in my mouth, rich, bold and oh so savory. I let out a moan as my eyes flit to Azriel who is watching me expectantly wondering if I’m going to like it or not. 
“This is incredible,” I say, covering my mouth with my hand so he doesn’t see me chewing. 
“Thank the cauldron I thought I put too much red pepper in,” he breathes out, seemingly relaxing before digging into his own plate. 
“No it’s perfect, thank you really,” I say earnestly. 
“You’re welcome,” he smiled, taking a bite of chicken.
We sit and eat our meals in silence simply enjoying the good food. A little shadow flitted up in front of my face to gauge my reaction to the bite of chicken I was chewing. I couldn’t help but laugh as it shifted like it was cocking its head at me. 
“Yes it’s very good, you did a wonderful job,” I laugh at the little fella. 
My giggle brings Azriel’s attention to me once again and before I know it he’s waving his hand at the little tendril like he’s swatting a fly. 
“Hey go away let her eat for the love of god,” he chastises as the shadow slinks back behind him. 
“Don’t worry it wasn’t bothering me,” I laugh taking another bite of green beans. 
“Yeah well they haven’t been listening lately,” he says looking back at the little shadow that had slinked behind his shoulder like a reprimanded child. 
I shake my head at the two of them interacting and take another sip of wine. To be honest I wasn;t really sure what to say to Azriel. Despite his valiant efforts to win me I still wasn’t ready to abandon the peace I had grown so fond of. 
“You know it’s funny,” he tells me, playing with the food on his plate. “I feel like my shadows have always liked you. It was like they knew before I did,” he laughed nervously at his confession. 
“Maybe so,” I shrug, not wanting to broach the subject, the friendlier we could make this the better.
“I can remember times when they would drag me into any room that had you in it. Most of the time I control them, but when it comes to you? They control me.” he laughs while taking a sip of his wine. 
“Thank you again for dinner,” I say, forcibly changing the topic of conversation. “It’s been a while since I had a home cooked meal. I think the local restaurants have my to-go orders memorized now.” I laugh. 
“Lucein used to cook for you didn’t he?” Azriel asks, and I can feel his eyes burning into the side of my head as I play with the pasta on my plate. 
“Yeah he did, he was a surprisingly good cook too,” I say, recalling the traditional Autumn Court meals he would cook all the time. They were mostly for him, for when he was feeling nostalgic, but he always left some for me as well. 
Azriel sits for a moment as if debating whether or not to say something for a moment. “Did you love him?” he asks. 
My fork clatters to the plate at the abrupt question and I’ve never felt so put on the spot. It was never something I had thought about in regards to the autumn court male. Love seemed like an emotion  that would be reserved for Azriel and Azriel alone, until one day it wasn’t. I didn’t love Lucien, but I certainly stopped loving Az in that way, or at least I think I did.
“No I didn’t” I say honestly turning to meet the shadowsingers gaze. “Lucien and I… it was never like that. We both knew what we needed for each other, it started as just sex. But then he would stay the night, and then we started going to breakfast. His shirts started showing up in the laundry hamper, his books on the coffee table. Eventually I just gave him a key, it seemed like the logical thing to do. We didn’t even label our relationship until he asked me to marry him.” 
“I wasn’t sure,” Azriel said, going back to shyly staring down at the table. “I overheard your conversation that one day. When you asked him about the possibility of having children. You said that you always pictured your children having wings, was that true?” he inquired. 
I nod shallowly, unable to trust my own words in such a raw moment. 
If Az had any other questions he didn’t ask them or press me to talk about the two of us, it was as if he was happy with the answers I did give him. He was perfectly content to let me finish eating my meal in comfortable silence. When I was finished he cleared the table and didn’t let me lift a finger to help clean. Instead those pesky shadows cornered me into reading my book once more. 
It wasn’t until a few minutes later that he came in, dressed in his shirt once more to bid me goodnight. He insisted that I stay in my comfortable spot by the couch as he walked himself out locking the door behind him. As the comfortable silence, which I had grown so used to, ensued, I found myself silently wishing he had stayed just a little longer.
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The following weeks were spent with little visits from shadows and shadowsingers. Sometimes it would be Azriel showing up at my door with coffee or gifts. Other times, when Rhys had Azriel on missions he would find ways to leave things at my doorstep. The first time it was another bouquet of flowers and then chocolates. 
My favorite gift from Azriel had been the books. The first set he got me was the second and third book in my series. They appeared at my door the morning after he made me dinner with a note that read…
I noticed that you were almost done with your book last night so I went out to get you the second book. I noticed it was a short book so I got you the third in case you finished it in one day like you no doubt will. 
-Azriel
Of course he was right and I finished the second book by the end of the day. When I opened the third, and much longer book, to begin reading it a bookmark fell out and another note. 
I figured you might need a bookmark for this one.
-Azriel
He was right about that as well. 
The next book to be delivered was a classic romance with certain pages, and quotes underlined. His notes scribbled in the margins. Clearly he had taken the time to read the novel himself. When I saw the first annotation I expected his further notes to be corny or cheesy, but each one was well thought out. 
The most recent literally delivery was a small and short book about different types of flowers. Between each of the pages sat a live flower that corresponded with the page. It was possibly the most vibrant and beautiful bouquet I had ever seen and by far my favorite floral gift I had received. 
This week though things had been different. As the colder months were drifting in I started spending more time inside, reading by the fire. But not once had Azriel stopped by. Not a present, not a note to be found. When I subtly asked Rhys were the shadowsinger was he told me he was in the isle of Hybern. 
A week had come and gone without so much as a tendril of a shadow to be seen. I sat infront of my roaring fire with a book in hand trying to escape the bitter cold. Outside the first snowfall of the year had taken the form of a blizzard. I pitied the shopkeepers that would have to walk home in it. 
Around midnight I heard the scraping of metal against stone from outside my house. I jumped out of my skin and quickly looked at the clock noting the late hour. I set down my novel to wrap myself in a blanket and pad over to the front door. I could already hear the winds outside and feel the cold air seeping in through the cracks in the door. 
I open the door to investigate the strange sound and I nearly gasp when I find Azriel outside my house shoveling my walkway with a small shovel from my garden. One meant for digging out plants and trees, not snow. 
“Az what are you doing?” I ask, making the spymaster jump a bit. 
“I’m shoveling your walkway. I didn’t want you to slip tomorrow morning or hurt your back trying to shovel it yourself,” he said, digging into the snow again with the little metal shovel. 
“Oh Az you don’t have to do that,” I coo walking out into the cold pulling my blanket tighter. 
“I don’t have to but I want to,” he said shoveling more snow. “It wouldn’t take so long if I had a bigger shovel.” he grunts, frustrated.
“Well why didn’t you take Rhys’ shovel?” I laughed watching as the overgrown Illyrain tried to mangle the tiny thing. 
“Well I just got back from Hybern, I saw it had snowed and I came here first.” he explained and my heart swelled. He had come to my place first before he even went home. “I figured if I didn’t do it you would fall and break your head open.” 
“Azriel, really you don’t have to do this, I can handle it,” I plead with him feeling bad that he’s subjected himself to the weather. 
He stops his shoveling and turns to look at me, “y/n I want to do this. Don’t worry about it.” he says before looking me up in down seeing that I’m in nothing but a short nightgown and a blanket. “Now go inside before you catch a cold.” 
“Me? What about you?” I laugh looking around at the snow falling around us. 
“I’m Illyrian the snow doesn’t bother me,” he retorts and I can tell that he’s lying by the pink in his cheeks from the cold.
“Well I’m half Illyrian,” I counter, swinging back and forth on my heels. 
“Then I’m sure half of you is really cold,” he rebuttals. “Now go back inside and get warm before I carry you inside myself.” he smirks before shoveling up another heap of snow. 
I just shake my head and retreat to the warm fireplace awaiting me. 
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I waltz into the House of Wind  where the Solstice party is in full swing. Lords from neighboring courts are chatting and drinking all around and from the corner of the room I can hear Cassian’s booming laugher as he doubles over at something Helion has said. 
Like almost every solstice party I arrive fashionably late. I truly never mean to be the last to arrive, but it feels like the whole guest list decides to arrive early just to spite me. I make my way around the area where couples and children are dancing to a small quartet and head toward the bar. My dress billows behind me like liquid starlight. Just like every solstice party before this one, I will get by with copious amounts of wine. 
I lean against the bar and watch as Elain and Lucien laugh and giggle across the room. I smile as Elain pops a pastry into Lu’s mouth and I can’t help but feel a warmness in my chest at the two of them. Lucien was finally happy with his mate, and if there was ever someone who deserved such happiness it was him. 
My thoughts are interrupted by a shadowy friend making its presence known. Flying up by my face to say hello and then rushing behind me as if it was called. I turn to see Azriel dressed immaculately staring at me. His eyes flit up and down my body taking in every detail of me.
“You look…” He trails off, shaking his head, as if the words he was going to say wouldn’t be the right ones. “There are no words. Even the poets would get it wrong.”
I can’t help but blush at his choice of words, taking a step toward him as the shadows behind me are pushing me to do so. 
“You clean up pretty good yourself, spymaster,” I chuckle giving him a once over.
He blushes and then speaks again, “I mean it, you look beautiful tonight y/n.” 
I blush again and turn my head to avoid his gaze, like that shade of hazel might burn me from the inside out if I look too long.
“You must allow me to dance with you,” he says, taking both our drinks and placing them on the bar. “Not having you out on that dance floor would be a disservice to everyone here.”
I laugh taking his outstretched hand and allowing him to lead me to the dancefloor, “Alright Az you’ve convinced me, but only because I know you won’t step on my feet,” 
We fall into a comfortable motion, swaying back and forth to the slow tempoed song the quartet is playing. The couples around us filter around us, some lost in deep conversation, some embraced closely swaying to the song. I keep my eyes on them, knowing that Azriel’s gaze is on me. 
Memories of a solstice much like this one float through my mind. The way my feet ached before Azriel saved me, sweeping me up into a dance. The way the bond felt when it snapped into place for me. I had pulled on it so desperately hoping he might feel it too. I thought of all the years of agony that followed that night. Watching Az fall for Mor and later on Elain. Hearing my brother and Cassian talking about Azriel’s exploits in bedding local women. All of it tore me apart and it took over 200 years to rebuild the part of me that I had lost. I wondered if I would ever be whole like that again. 
I hear Elain and Lucien’s laughter once more, the sound breaking me from my thoughts as Azriel and I continue to sway to the music. 
“They make a great couple,” Azriel’s deep voice rumbles through me. 
I smile watching Lucine place a kiss to his mates lips, “They really do,” I say with a lightness to my voice. 
“Do you think we’ll ever be like that?” He asks tentatively and my world comes crashing down. 
“Az,” I say and his face falls at the dismissal in my tone. 
“Why not y/n? Why can’t we have a shot like they can?” Azriel says starting to get upset.
As if on queue the song that the quartet is playing ends and I hear the musicians flipping through their sheet music to find the next song. I pull my hands out of Azriel’s and take a few steps back.
“I think it’s time for me to go,” I say calmly, trying not to let the damn of tears break. I swiftly move past him towards the door. 
“Y/n wait!” I hear him call out behind me but I’m already out the door, my tears falling down my face as I make my way back to that empty townhouse in the middle of the city. 
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The rain outside my house slams into the window violently. Spring has come early in Velaris and I wasn’t exactly upset about it. At least I wasn’t until this torrential downpour blew into town. I hadn’t seen rain like this in the Night Court for at least a hundred years now.
It’s been weeks since solstice and it seems that Azriel has finally taken the hint and left me alone. I hadn’t heard a peep from him since that dance. Not a flower, chocolate or shadow to be seen and while I should be happy about it I had never been sadder. After all the walls I put up trying to keep my peace it seemed that he had succeeded in breaking them down again. 
I sat by the fire staring down at the dancing flames, no book, not even a glass of wine or tea. Just me and my all consuming thoughts. Each one of them led back to hazel eyes and blue siphons. 
I jump at the sound of a fist pounding on my door. Pulling my sweater tighter to cover up my nightgown I walk over to investigate who would have the guts to stand out in this monsoon at this hour. When I open the door I find Azriel bracing his arms against the doorframe, out of breath like he ran here. His hair soaking wet and sticking to his brow as the rain pelted him. 
“Az?” I shout over the sound of rain. 
“I can’t go on like this any longer y/n, I won’t do it!” he shouts over the storm. 
“Az it’s pouring what are you-” 
“I love you y/n!” he shouts stopping me mid sentence. “From the moment I met you I knew. I wanted so badly to put my hands around your waist and kiss you. And if you’re wondering why that seems like such an adolescent dream it’s because that’s what we both were. I was 117 years old and  you were 115 and that’s all I wanted. I knew little of love, even less of lust. All I knew was that I wanted to kiss you,” he hollers over the sound of rain wiping the water from his eyes.
“I’ve made mistakes, and I’ve hurt you, but I swear to you I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you, because I love you. And I don’t care that you don’t love me too, because I love you y/n. I choose to love you!” he finishes and I can’t tell if it's rain falling from his eyes or tears that match my own. 
I choose to love you.
I take a shaky breath and take in the sheer desperation on his face, “I love you too Azriel,” I laugh feeling another tear slip down my cheek. 
He doesn’t waste a moment, stepping through my threshold and cupping my cheek to place a searing kiss on my lips. I melt into him, feeling his clothes soaking my own as my nightgown clings to my skin. His hands are on my waist, scarred and cold from the elements but still so intoxicating. My arms wrap around him pulling him further into the entryway. I hear him slam the door shut with his boot drowning out the sound of rain leaving only the music of our ragged breaths as he kisses me deeper. 
He pulls away to press his forehead to mine, his wet hair and skin causing drops of water to cascade down my own face. 
“I love you so much,” he breathes cupping my cheek to press a chaste kiss to my lips. “My mate.”
I pull him in deeper at the utterance of those two little words. I had waited 400 years for this male to kiss me, and this kiss right here? Well it made everything all the more worth it. 
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Epilogue: 5 years later
I stand outside on the lawn of the townhouse. My arms clutching around the sweater I’m wearing as the fresh spring air blows over my skin. My hands drift lower to the small bump of my stomach. 
I was only a few months pregnant and barely starting to show. Elain had told me that it would be a girl claiming she had seen it in a vision. I couldn’t have been more excited for Azriel to be a girl dad. 
“You’re doing it son!” I hear my mate call from the sky where he teaches our son to fly. 
“Dad, I'm flying!” the onyx haired child shouted as he flapped his wings to pick up some speed.
At first I was apprehensive of him learning to fly so early, even though it had always been a dream of mine to watch my children learn to fly. But Azriel had assured me that the youngster was more than ready, and after a few weeks of lessons here he was taking to the air like a natural. 
I look around at the townhouse behind me. It had seen some significant changes since the night Azriel stood in the rain and told me he loved me. The front yard was littered with toy swords and shields, and the outside had a fresh coat of paint. The inside had a room addition, a room for our son, Kai, and now we're adding another room for our daughter. All paid for by Rhys of course who was more than happy to give his nephew and niece everything under the sun.
My thoughts are interrupted by Azriel slamming into the ground before me. I turn to see him walking over to me with a smile on his face. 
“Az shouldn’t you be up there with him?!” I fuss looking to where our son swoops and dives through the air. 
Azriel laughs and picks me up bridal style, pressing a kiss to my lips. 
“It didn’t feel right being up there without my girls,” he smiled nodding to my bump. 
Without warning he took off into the sky meeting Kai up there. We must’ve spent hours flying around the city, stopping by every uncle and aunt's house to show them Kai’s new skill. Everything was perfect, and for the first time in my whole life, I finally knew peace.
(Do you guys want a smutty bonus chapter of what they did after he confessed his love???)
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nebuliias · 2 days
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I read your post about being the younger sibling of Sunday and Robin, and let me just say, I am SO glad I'm not the only one who enjoys the idea! There is so much potential!!!
Though I'd like to offer a new flavor of sibling fic: the two chicken wing sibs are normal, but their youngest sibling is like Jim Hawkins from Treasure Planet. Rebellious and reckless, always getting into trouble on the solar surfer. Why? Because they feel neglected. They feel that the only way to feel alive again is to zip around in restricted areas of Dream's Edge, making the Bloohounds chase after them. Again. And Sunday can only sigh and punish them for their reckless behavior. Again.
Because let's face it, if the youngest sibling is unremarkable in any way, shape, or form, they're gonna be overshadowed and forgotten. Sunday is the head of the Oak family, and Robin is an intergalactic superstar. All the youngest can say they've done was build a solar surfer from spare parts that Robin brought back for them.
(As you can see, this idea has been Plaguing Me)
— just trust me, you’ll be fine..
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ft. you’re the sibling of sunday and robin who’s frequently overshadowed by them
cw: hurt/comfort-ish but not really ig, PLATONIC, reader is aged 15, reader is halovian but no specified appearance other than halo and wings, mentions of maeven ellis and makeup and all that stuff, gn! reader, also reader’s a performer
a/n’s note: hiiii anon, tysm for the idea!! sorry if its not exactly how u wanted it, i didnt know how to write it down that detailed since idk the character too well so i switched up some things and roles :(( i hope u like it though, i tried 😓 BTW THIS IS LONG AS HELL AND IDK HOW TO CHECK WORD COUNT ON MOBILE SO ENJOY‼️
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— to the entirety of penacony, you’re the sibling of sunday and robin who’s simply just.. there. sure, they respect and acknowledge your presence when you appear in public, but it’s not as grand and respectable when your siblings make way on the streets.
— being the youngest has its cons as well. you’re pretty lonely since your sister is in and out of the home planet, and your brother is always busy upholding his duties. they weren’t neglectful to you, oh no. they just never really had the time for you..
— because of this, you had to get creative with entertaining yourself. your passion for two of the seven fine arts, sculpture and performing, distracted you from the solitude.
— occasionally, robin would buy you materials so you could sculpt simple creations which made you feel overjoyed. you would spend hours trying to perfect a single masterpiece to gift sunday. when you did give it to him, he would always pat you on the head and thank you for the gift with a smile and proceed to put it on a shelf with the rest of your artworks. after that, he would practically never mention it again.
— it didn’t dishearten you entirely, but it made you feel.. empty? you knew you couldn’t cry over something so small, it was too pathetic to do so, right? plus, you couldn’t really tell robin about it. after all, what was she going to anyway?
— as for your love for performing, it was beyond explanation. your older siblings had enrolled you into a theatre arts center that was administered by the iris family themselves. on the weekends, you would go there to attend classes on performances to practice and learn about acting since you strived to become a famous artiste, just like your sister!
— almost immediately did you fit in with the school. your drama coach praised you for your exceptional talents, and newly made friends complimented for your devoted skills for someone who just arrived! but of course, they were just compliments. who knew if they were your friends just because you were the sibling of the great sunday and lovable robin..?
— but because you had just recently joined, you weren’t offered opportunities just yet. instead, you assisted those who worked in theatre production, the ones who help make the sets, costumes, etc. however, you didn’t let the chance go to waste, but you decided to go against telling your siblings since compared to what they have accomplished, your achievement was like ashes flowing in the wind.
— was this envy?
— eventually, you dropped your habit of sculpting to pursue your dream in acting. sometimes, you would sneak out in the night to go towards the center’s theater where the more experienced students held their musicals, plays, and such, even though sunday had basically forbidden you from leaving the abode late in the evening.
— while in disguise, you blended in with the audience and watched as the performers sung, danced, or acted on stage, praying to xipe that maybe, just maybe, you would be the one the audience would be clapping for one day. and that maybe penacony would finally view you with the same admiration that they gave to sunday and robin.
— unfortunately, while returning home after one of your escapades, you ran into your older siblings, and boy, did it turn out so great..
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you knew you had messed up big time terribly when you found yourself sitting in a chair a foot away from sunday, his molten gold eyes glaring daggers at you. robin simply stood nearby, a compassionate look in her sparkly eyes.
“so tell me,” sunday began to say, “why on earth are you just returning home at almost midnight, wearing clothes suitable for a banquet?”
robin sighed before looking away from you, probably aware of why you were dressed that way. after all, she knew of your dedication towards the fine arts. meanwhile, one of your hands nervously stroked the feathers of your dainty wings while the other dug around inside your handbag. “uhm, well, i-“
“do you know just how close i was to sending the bloodhounds after you? do you know how worried sick we were because of your sudden disappearance?” sunday asked, his voice shattering the quietness of the study room.
you flinched at his sudden tone, your hands shaping into trembling fists. your face heated up in shame, your eyes burning with unshed tears. your older sister, sensing your fear, rushed to The Family’s head side and grabbed ahold of his hand. “brother, please, watch your tone.. i’m sure they didn’t mean to.”
this was supposed to an action to ease your turmoil, to soothe sunday’s temper, but this infuriated you.
unexpectedly, you stood up and yelled at them, uncaring of whoever could be nearby.
“shut the hell up! i’m tired of hiding in the dark. you two always get all the recognition, while i’m left in the shadows. while you get the praise and recognition for what you’ve done, i’m left unnoticed! does anyone bother to recognize my efforts? no, all because you're both prominent and more experienced! its not fair at all.. i have talents and abilities too, you know. why do i always have to be the one to fade into the background?”
your siblings were stunned. they weren’t expecting such.. a strong reaction from you. sunday’s glaring eyes softened and gave you an outstretched hand, only for you to shove it away.
as if a switch had been flipped, you took a deep breath in and out, a tear rolling down your suddenly now-jaded face. “who cares, honestly," you gave a dry laugh, throwing your handbag down in frustration. "it’s not like anyone will ever notice my hard work anyway." with that, you stormed off, dropping off the conversation and leaving the room.
among the spilled items on the floor, a crumpled flyer innocently lay there. sunday, with a remorseful sigh, picked it up and smoothed it out, holding it towards the moonlight where robin could also see it.
“Sonata Productions Presents: the upcoming musical, “Harmonium Heights” that’ll be held in Moondrop Coliseum located in Moment of Stars!”
“Starring Y/N in her debut role as the main and noble protagonist, we invite you to join us for an evening of unforgettable music, as we witness the rise of a star shine on the Iris Family stage! Tickets will be available at the theater’s entrance on May 24th, we hope to see you there!”
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— it was safe to say that after your outbursts, you refused to meet eye-to-eye contact with your family, only exchanging nods in greeting.
— to avoid the pain, you worked harder into improving your character for the upcoming musical. it was still beyond belief to you since it was lady maeven ellis, head of the iris family herself, who had personally gave you the position because in her words, you had “the voice to achieve stardom.”
— many of your peers were jealous but still supported you nonetheless. however, they quickly lost their reason for their envy and instead joined alongside you, some casting in other leading roles in the same musical.
— is this what it was like to be genuinely admired?
— despite the kudos, there was still a guilt-ridden spot in your heart which made you feel horrible for the quarrel you started and hoped you could make it up as soon as possible.
— alas, lady maeven ellis was quite demanding. not necessarily strict or hurtful, but she expected that you gave it your all during the musical, considering the fact she created it herself.
— so everyday, after school and on the weekends, you would head to the theatre arts center to practice in front of an imaginary audience, pretending that you were just like robin who had thousands of fans cheering for her onstage. but you suppose.. your good friends and coach were enough for the time being.
— you forgot about your problems when you pretended. you enjoyed the faux spotlight when you pretended. hey, maybe pretend-play wasn’t so bad, after all!
— however, you no longer needed to pretend once the big day had arrived. aeons, were you nervous.
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actors and actresses alike ran around the dressing rooms looking for their costumes or shoes, or were practicing last-minute lines, while you were preparing for your big debut. with your elegant costume and hair and makeup were done to perfection, you exuded a sense of readiness and nervousness at the same time.
maeven ellis had come to comfort your nerves, giving you a pat-down of your outfit and polishing your golden halo for finishing touches.
“lady maeven, what if i forget my lines? what if the audience is displeased by my performance?” you anxiously inquired, fixing the bracelet on your wrist. the woman placed a finger on your lips, cutting off your words.
“my child, you have nothing to fear! the stage is your canvas, and you are the artist. your fondness and talent have brought you here, and now it's time to let them shine. immerse yourself in the limelight, and let the emotions wash over you.”
“the stage is a realm where all barriers between people are shattered. tonight, you are the star they’ll be admiring. let your voice and your presence shine brighter than any constellation in the night sky. go forth now, break a leg, my dear! the show is about to commence.” with that, she gave you a kiss on the cheek before rushing to where the elites were to be sat at.
you found yourself being escorted towards the backstage. as the lights dimmed and the chatter in the auditorium quieted down, you made your way up the stage while your heart pounded in your chest.
the curtain slowly rose and the opening notes of the musical's overture filled the air, you took a deep breath and made way. the bright spotlight illuminated your figure, and the cheers and whistles of the audience were directed to you. despite the inner stage fright, you held your head high and smiled, ready to give the performance of a lifetime.
unbeknownst to you, your older siblings, robin and sunday, whom you thought were completely unaware of the grand show, sat right in the front row seats, clapping eagerly for you. suddenly freezing in your place, you simply waited for the audience to die down their patience, until your sister whispered-yelled at you loud enough to hear. “we believe in you!”
the simple gesture instantly lifted your spirits, and a beaming grin spread across your face. any haunting disappointments melted away, replaced by an adrenaline that could hardly be contained. armed with newfound confidence, you turned your attention back to the audience all hustle and bustle, prepared to give them the rendition of a lifetime.
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— when you brought down your final and dramatic act, everyone — from the minor to leading actors and actresses, especially you — had received thundering ovations from the mesmerized crowd. heck, some were even chanting your name! finally, your life-long prayers had been answered!
— after the performance, you found herself roaming around the backstage area, feeling proud of yourself that you proved your worth to the citizens of penacony at last. howbeit, you were specifically waiting for a few certain people whom you occasionally glanced during your act.
— just as you were about to slip away unnoticed, suddenly, you felt yourself being lifted into the air, and the next thing you knew, you squealed and were twirling around in the arms of sunday who released you once he was done.
— robin approached with a bouquet of your favorite flowers, offering them up with a proud smile.
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“oh gosh, you scared the living life out of me, sunday!” you lightly scolded, but a small smile had now taken your frown’s place. you turned to face robin who was currently giggling at your banter. “what are you two doing here? i thought you didn’t know about my debut..?” you pondered.
“seriously, y/n?” sunday responded instead. “you conquered that stage with such mettle and charisma, i thought to myself: was that even my littlest sibling anymore?” he chuckled in that tranquil tone of his while gently ruffling your neat hair.
robin happily chirped in. “we just couldn't help it, your performance was absolutely stunning! and your outfit too! we wanted to show you how proud we are of you, especially after all you’ve been through.” she poked at your cheek playfully.
you couldn’t help but laugh. not out of sarcasm or dryness, but genuinely out of pure bliss. carefully holding the floral bouquet in one hand, you gave your older siblings a side hug with both your arms.
“thank you both so much,” you began, “your support is all i need in this dreamality, really.” a full smile had now formed on your face, eyes shimmering in the theatrical atmosphere.
as the three of you made weaved your way outside and through the busy streets, sunday spoke up. “well, how about a celebratory dinner at your favorite restaurant? it’s on me tonight.” he gave you a playful wink.
you linked arms with them both, taking in sunday’s simple yet meaningful smile and robin’s bright presence. as you all walked under the blanket of the cosmos, you nodded earnestly.
“i’d love that.”
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a/n’s note (2): HOLY SHITITITI THAT TOOK SO LONG 😭 again, sorry anon if its not to ur liking but i tried to shed light on it yk. but i rlly hoped yall liked it nonetheless bc imo, i sure did :3
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Text
Sam is sleeping at your place tonight \\ S.M
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Summary : It was another one of those days where your boyfriend stayed over for the night. But what happens when instead of sleeping, something else happens?
// kisses, touching a bit, a bit of 18+ stuff , both of you are 18 or 19...
(I totally forgot that Sam is literally 16 in the movie 🙃)
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The soft glow of the TV illuminated the room, casting shadows across the walls as you and Sam lay on your bed, cuddling.
Your leg draped over his.
Sam got hooked by the show, but you were focusing at his face,
admiring the contours and features you knew so well.
His natural beauty, without makeup, had a unique charm for you.
In the quiet of the night, surrounded by one another's warmth, It was the simplicity of being together that gave you joy.
"You look beautiful without makeup, Sammy" you whispered softly, your words barely audible over the sound of the TV.
Sam turned to you, a hint of surprise in his eyes, followed by a warm smile that reached all the way to his eyes "Thanks, babe" he said.
"I also love your profile side" you said, running your finger along Sam's jawline.
He tilted his head slightly, the soft glow of the TV drawing attention to his features.
"Really?" he asked, his tone slightly shy.
With a soft smile on your lips, you nodded. "Yes, without a doubt" You replied, appreciation clearly visible in your look, "It's just as beautiful as the front view"
A mixture of passion and affection colored Sam's face who felt grateful for your compliments.
"What's going on right now, baby?" He laughs, taken aback by your surprising compliment, you chuckle at his confusion,"Just feeling extra appreciative of your beauty tonight, that's all" you say, your tone light and affectionate.
Sam's laughter fills the room, the sound echoing with warmth and happiness "Well, I'm not complaining" he said as he pulling you closer for a hug.
You meet Sam's gaze, feeling a flutter of excitement in your chest as he looks down at you, his eyes linger on your lips, and when he asks, "Y/N? Can I kiss you?" your heart skips a beat, you nod, a soft smile spreading across your lips, your eyes locking with his, "you don't need to ask" you whisper, closing the distance between your lips in a sweet, tender kiss.
Suddenly you hear a knock on the door, causing you both to sit up fast like you did nothing "Yes?" You said, "Kids, can you turn the TV down a little?" "I'm going to bed" your mom said.
You exchange a quick glance with Sam, a smile playing on your lips as you both try not to laugh. “Sure, Mom” you call out, trying to sound casual despite the lingering heat of the moment. "Good night!" Sam adds, his voice filled with amusement.
As the sound of your mother's footsteps fade away, you both break out into quiet laughter, the interruption only adding to the sweetness of the moment.
"Let's go to sleep, I need to help my dad tomorrow with the house, you know." You nod understandingly, "But..." he continues, a hint of frustration seeping into his voice, "I really would like to kiss you again" you meet his gaze with a soft smile "Of course you would" you joked, your heart skipping a beat at the thought of another tender moment shared between you two.
With a gentle sigh, Sam leans in, pressing a lingering kiss to your lips before reluctantly pulling away, "Why are you disappointed like it's the end of the world" you laughed "well.." he adjusts his sweatpants "Not now..."
You watch as Sam adjusts his sweatpants, a mix of desire and frustration evident in his movements.
His words trail off, leaving the suggestion hanging in the air.
You meet his gaze, "Maybe we can steal a few moments" you suggest, a playful smile tugging at your lips.
Sam's eyes light up at your suggestion, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. "Yeah?" he murmurs, the excitement evident in his voice.
Without waiting for a response, he closes the distance between you, his lips capturing yours in a passionate kiss.
Time seems to stand still as you lose yourselves in each other, the world outside your bedroom fading away.
As the kiss deepens, a wave of desire washes over you, igniting a fiery passion between you and Sam.
His hands roam gently over your body, tracing every curve that sends shivers down your spine, your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him closer as you lose yourself in the intoxicating heat of the moment. Time seems to stand still as you explore each other with a fervent hunger, your bodies moving in perfect harmony.
As you reluctantly break the kiss, a breathless chuckle escapes your lips. "We should stop," you say softly, though your own desire still burns brightly.
Sam looks at you with a mix of longing and uncertainty, his eyes searching yours for reassurance. "Are you sure?" he asks, his voice husky with desire as he leans in to kiss you again.
Despite the tempting pull of his lips, you gently place a hand on his chest, meeting his gaze with a smile. "Yeah, I'm sure," you reply, your voice filled with affection. "We have all the time in the world for this Sam" With a final lingering kiss, you both reluctantly pull away,
" You can't do this to me right now " he said, joking leaning in to kiss your neck, you laugh softly at Sam's playful protest, feeling a rush of warmth as he leans in to kiss your neck.
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His lips against your skin send a shiver down your spine, and you tilt your head back, savoring the sensation. "You're the one who started it" you tease, a smile playing on your lips as his kisses trail along your neck.
Despite the temptation, you gently push him away with a playful pout. "But seriously, let's save the rest for other time" you say, Sam chuckles, pressing a final kiss to your lips before settling back beside you, his arm draped protectively over your waist.
"Well, you are the one who gave me those compliments" he said, making you gasp softly and turning you around in surprise as Sam's lips find yours once more.
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His hands roam over your body, sending electric pulses of pleasure through your veins.
You find yourself melting into his touch, unable to resist the magnetic pull of his desire.
As he squeezes your breasts softly, a moan escapes your lips, the sensation sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.
Lost in the heat of the moment, you surrender yourself completely to the intoxicating bliss of his touch, knowing that with Sam, every moment is filled with love and desire.
you find yourself melting into his touch, unable to resist as he squeezes your breasts softly, a moan escapes your lips, the sensation sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.
As his lips continue to caress yours, the world around you fades into a blur, leaving only the two of you lost in a haze of passion and desire. His touch ignites a fiery longing within you, sending your heart racing with every gentle squeeze and tender kiss.
You find yourself craving more, your body arching towards his in a silent plea for closeness.
Feeling Sam shift his weight, you gasp softly as he settles on top of you, his gaze burning with desire as he looks down at you.
Your breath catches in your throat as his hands roam over your body, his touch sending shivers of pleasure coursing through you.
Lost in the intensity of the moment, you wrap your arms around him, pulling him closer as you lose yourself in the heat of his embrace.
"Hey" you murmur between kisses, "you're pretty good at this whole making out thing" Sam grins against your lips, his hands tracing patterns along your sides, "Well, I've had a lot of practice" he teases, his voice husky with desire.
You playfully roll your eyes "Oh, is that so? Should I be jealous?" He chuckles, leaning in to nuzzle your neck "Nah, you're the only one who gets to experience my expert kissing skills", You laugh softly, running your fingers through his hair "Lucky me" you quip, pulling him closer for another kiss.
you playfully nudge Sam with your elbow "So, tell me, Mr. Expert Kisser, what's your secret?"
Sam smirks, his eyes sparkling mischievously "Ah, well, it's all about the technique" he replies with mock seriousness.
You raise an eyebrow, "Oh really?"
Leaning in close, Sam whispers conspiratorially, "It's all in the lip action" He punctuates his words with a series of exaggerated kissing noises, causing you to burst into giggles.
"Is that so?" you tease, running your fingers along his jawline "I'll have to take notes for future reference", Sam laughs, pressing a quick kiss to your nose. "Consider it a masterclass in smooching" he says with a wink, before capturing your lips in another passionate kiss.
Sam suddenly pulls away, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Wait a minute," he says, pretending to search his pockets, "I think I have something that'll take our makeout session to the next level."
Curious, you watch as Sam rummages around before producing a small tube of lip balm, you raise an eyebrow, unsure of what to expect, "Trust me," Sam says with a grin, uncapping the lip balm and applying it to his lips with exaggerated precision.
You can't help but laugh at the sight of him, his playful antics bringing a smile to your face. "What are you doing?" you ask, trying to stifle your giggles.
"Just adding a little extra...flavor" Sam replies with a wink, leaning in to kiss you once more.
As his lips meet yours, you can't help but taste the sweet hint of the lip balm.
You pull away from the kiss, unable to contain your laughter as you look at Sam with mock disbelief. "You are so weird, Sam," you say between giggles, shaking your head in amusement. "That's the last thing I expected from you to do."
Sam grins, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he shrugs, "Hey, I like to keep you on your toes" he says, his tone playful,
"Life's too short to be predictable."
You chuckle, reaching out to ruffle his hair affectionately. "Well, you definitely succeeded in surprising me," he lean in to capture your lips in another kiss, the taste of the lip balm adding an extra layer of sweetness to the moment.
You gently place your hands on Sam's chest, trying to suppress a laugh as you push him away gently. "No, enough, Sam," you say firmly, though the laughter still dances in your eyes "We really need to sleep."
But Sam doesn't seem to heed your words, his kisses growing more insistent, you can't help but giggle as his persistence, even as you try to maintain some semblance of seriousness.
"Sam, seriously" you protest, though the smile on your lips betrays your amusement, "We have to get up early tomorrow" Sam finally relents, though a mischievous twinkle remains in his eyes.
"Okay okay" he says with a grin, rolling over to his side of the bed, "But no promises about tomorrow night."
You laugh softly, shaking your head in fond exasperation as you settle back into the bed beside him.
With a final kiss goodnight, you both drift off to sleep.
Should I make part two? ;)
Edit:
Even though no one asked, I'm still going to try to make a second part to this, lol.
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irisintheafterglow · 2 days
Text
he's the death you chose (you're in terrible danger)
summary: married life with husband!gojo means cleaning up bodies at 2am.
wc: 1k
cw/tags: mentions of violence, blood, and deaths (nothing graphic), mild angst/comfort with happy ending, some swearing, yes this is the albatross coded
note: honestly not sure where this came from! was just listening to ttpd and thought about what being married to gojo realistically would be like (aka always being targeted as his weakness that it becomes routine). hope you like it :)
likes, reblogs, and replies are always appreciated <3
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Wise men once said, “Don’t sleep with your windows open,” and you should have listened to them. If you had, there wouldn’t be three dead mercenaries in your living room, and another somewhere in your kitchen. There were five, originally, but you figured the last one was being hunted down a hallway as he tried to escape your building. The blood-spotted microwave’s clock reads 2:08 when you glance at it to grab cleaning supplies from the cupboard. 2:10 is when Satoru re-enters the apartment and kicks off his shoes. 
“I called Ijichi; he’s sending over cleaners right now,” he says, carefully stepping around the blood and curse guts splattered on the floorboards. Stray drops of who knows what speckle the photos on the bookshelf and he wipes them with his sleeve, scowling. “I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner.” 
“Yeah, there’d probably be less of a mess,” you admit, wiping down the kitchen island and guiding the crumbs and dust into the trash. “But they’d still be dead, so I guess it doesn’t really matter in the end.” 
“You handled yourself pretty well for being out of the country for a few months,” he adds appreciatively, retrieving the carpet cleaner from under the sink and sprinkling it onto the living room floor. “I still think it’d be better if you lived on-campus, though.” He squints in the pale moonlight at the pile of abrasive powder and decides to dump a little bit more for good measure. 
“I know–Hey, what’d I tell you about wasting the carpet cleaner? A little goes a long way, remember?” Satoru sets the tube down and puts his hands up in surrender, reaching back and tightening his blindfold before he approaches you in the kitchen. “I can hear your thoughts as they make their way to your mouth, dear.” 
“Look, I know what you’re gonna say–”
“Don’t ask what you’re about to ask, then, if you already know the answer,” you interject with that lightning-quick wit he adored so much. You move to grab the broom from next to the fridge, but he gently catches your wrist and turns you to face him. 
“You’d be safer there,” he continues and you pull your lips into a tight line. 
“Only place I’m safe is wherever I'm with you, realistically.” You had a point. In any other circumstance, the sentiment would be sweet if it wasn’t horribly true. You’d heard time and time again from Satoru how he stared restlessly at the ceiling, anxious about what danger might be coming wherever you were. He theorizes that the higher-ups promoted you to spite him, to have you travel even more often than he was and visit more places across the globe than any seasoned sorcerer would be comfortable with. Phone calls weren’t enough to verify that you were safe; he had to see you, feel you, know you were alive. “This is, what, the second time this month? The first time was when I came back from Paris, right?”
“I don’t think that was this month. It might’ve been the last week of the month prior. Monaco, maybe?”
“Eh, same thing. They always come after me when I get back from Europe. You think they’re trying to catch me off guard or something?”
“I don’t know if we can predict a schedule with these guys, babe,” he grimaces. As much as he liked that you were making light of the situation, the churning in his gut about what could have happened if he didn’t come was too painful to ignore. “Your dad would kill me if he saw how much danger I put you in.” 
“It’s a step up than sneaking me out of the third story of the house, I’ll admit,” you tease. How you could still find humor in times like these, he could never fathom. It’d taken months to convince your father to let Satoru court you, let alone marry you. To your family, he was an impediment, an obstacle, and, unfortunately, the love of your life. “Maybe even as bad as the food poisoning you got from that one place in Sendai.”
“I don’t think ‘in sickness and in health’ is supposed to apply to attempted assassinations. Food poisoning and sprained ankles, sure, but that other one toes the line a little too much.” The frequency of your life in danger was why he wanted you to live full-time on one of the Jujutsu Tech campuses and become a teacher, like him. Sure, a selfish part of him wanted you closer all the time, but he’d pick your safety over your proximity any day. 
“How far are the cleaners?” You yawn, washing your hands at the sink and scanning for everything in your home that needs to be wiped or scrubbed. 
“Ten minutes, tops. I can wait for them if you wanna go back to bed.” He knew you weren’t going to take him up on his offer. You were never able to sleep properly after attempts like this unless he was in the same room. “Though I know you won’t.”
“Isn’t it a little fucked up that we know how the rest of these nights usually go?” You chuckle, a soft, airy sound that takes some of the weight off of Satoru’s chest. You were truly sunlight incarnate and he was the darkest, unseen side of the moon. 
“I’d say this is all my fault, honestly.” You look at him curiously and he shrugs. “I’m the one who made you fall in love with me, after all.” 
“By that logic, I’m also partially to blame,” you point out, flashing him the ring on your left hand. The glow of cursed energy Satoru had embedded into the gemstones glows like Christmas lights in the darkness. The energy was more concentrated than your own body’s natural reserves, allowing him to pinpoint you immediately as long as you were wearing it. Danger and plans A through Z, and everything in between that came with marrying the strongest sorcerer in existence. “I can’t count the number of people who warned me about you.”  
“Why didn’t you listen to them?” 
“Because they’re not you,” you smile. “If you say that you’ll keep me safe, then I trust you to keep your word.” Sunlight incarnate, he thinks again, and God help anyone who tries to block you from him.
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yurinaa-world · 2 days
Note
Can I request Jing Yuan, Dan Heng and Sundy with an anxious!cozy!s/o who secretly terrifyingly observant and calculating? ((👁-👁) level ie. looking deep into your soul level observant.)
At times it slips (ex. Admitting to being obsessed with complex puzzles that most people can't even fathom or subtly tipping them about someone's intention before the boys pick up on it) reader panics a bit.
Reader is conflicted because on onehand, they know whats going on and they wont get tricked easily BUT they hate how they know too much at times. Thus fuels their anxiety.
They either have to isolate themselves for a while or wear cozy oversized garmets as comfort (aka all the time)
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Characters: Jing Yuan, Dan Heng, & Sunday x Gender-neutral reader
Synopsis: with anxious and cozy reader
Warnings: Fluff and spelling mistakes,
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𝒥𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒴𝓊𝒶𝓃
Over time he’s picked up more details on your behaviour, you're so observant to the point you don’t realize that your face says what you're thinking. Just in the middle of a conversation with you, he can see how you look around taking in everything around as if you were a cute detective. 
He doesn’t mind that you want to be alone or that you just want to sit in silence, seeing You'll get overloaded and get a headache. He does worry you end up staying up late and being lost in thoughts, forgetting that it’s already 3:00 am. (He might just grab you, cover your eyes and force you to bed to get a good night's sleep).
He finds your cute oversized clothes then formal (because you like to look so comfortable in them), your hair is all messy, your tired voice, sometimes the shirt is off one of your shoulders because it is way too oversized for you but it’s still comfortable.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“What might my dear be thinking about instead of sleeping?”  
You don’t even realize that he’s there until he wraps his arm around you and pulls you against his side. “I can’t sleep, I'm thinking about something.”  You turn towards him and find him already looking at you with a look that’s both gentle and tender. 
You feel like something is wrong, squinting your eyes at him—you just have that weird gut feeling—looking around his body to find ‘something’ you are not sure what it is until you look at his shoulder—it looks way too stiff than usual, your hand grabbing his shoulder a bit roughly only to hear him let out a small groan.
“Did you get hurt?” You ask softly, letting go of the shoulder in an instant,  looking at him worriedly, “Can't let anything escape your gaze?” He smiles slightly though, leaning forward and kissing the side of your head lightly before you cover his mouth with your hand, frowning on your face.
“Are you sure you’re fine?”  You ask again, this time more serious than earlier. He shakes his head and kisses your hand once before removing it from his mouth. “I promise that I’m alright.” He says in a soft voice,  caressing your cheek.  This makes you look away shyly,  the warmth spreading across your cheeks.
“it’s time for you to go to bed.” “I don’t need you telling me that-“ he grabs you and pulls you close into him, shoving your face in his chest so you couldn’t see anything “Sleep.”
𝒟𝒶𝓃 𝐻𝑒𝓃𝑔
He’s amazed by how you still remember the small details in a conversation that even he can’t remember. He thought at first you were like him, observant, and quiet but you surpassed and beyond everything you expected from him.
You spend most of your time in his room and not your own, not that he doesn’t mind at all but just looking over from his books to see you looking around his room trying to see small details while messing with a complicated puzzle in your hands.
He takes you away to calm you down when you’re in a conversation to hear what you want to say—that face you had, eyes wide and slightly nervous while looking at your nails and back at the person. (he got you out of that conversation so quickly)
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
Looking down on your puzzle with your brain bustling with ideas and taking notes of small details around his room that usually aren't noticed (and you might also be watching him read one of his books and might have been staring for too long that you locked eyes by accident and looked away). Quickly shifting the pieces of the puzzle when you get caught yet neither of you say anything, that doesn't stop you from gazing at him from the top of your eye.
"Dan Heng why are you reading that book when you already finished it?"  you asked softly/ "It's a well-written book with good character development and story building." "Is it that good that I want to read for the 3rd time?"  he responded while looking up from his book to look at you. "you just said it was only the 3rd time so I'd assume it is still good enough to read again." 
"But Dan Heng don't you ever want to read new things?." you understand everything and why people do it but you're just curious about what a person thinks of what they're doing and the reasons for their actions. He doesn't mind asking him questions and he'll answer each one with the best of his abilities. 
“Sometimes people like to reread things because they don’t want something to end.”
“Oh is that what you're doing?—oddly enough you always are in that spot specifically while reading that same book.” You say before murmuring another part. “You always remember everything don’t you.”
𝒮𝓊𝓃𝒹𝒶𝓎
You’re just like him. He doesn’t expect anything less from his soulmate, it’s as if you were hand-made for each other. Your mind is so calculating and observant, the dream you are. He’ll adore you, he’ll tease you, smile with you, he’ll experience everything with you.
He raves about the small cute glances you do when you think he doesn’t notice or when you take your eyes off from whatever you might be doing just to look at him working. He can feel your loving gaze before you go back to whatever you might be doing. (He might just confront you and see your embarrassed expression)
Don’t worry about anything, not even the person you’re warning him about, he’s already dealt with long before you got the chance to tell him.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“Sunday aren’t you worried?” 
You don’t understand how he’s never worried about anything, just so calm even when you're alone with each other. “what would I be worried about my dear?” you feel him taking into your heart, arms around your shoulder, your back pressed against his chest.
“Didn’t you see how suspicious they were acting?” you say with hesitation in your tone, your fingers tightening onto the fabric of his shirt. you feel him nod as a response from behind you. 
“I know something’s up, I feel it in my gut…I just wanted to warn you”. you mumble the last sentence,  turning to face him, he looks down, and his hand goes to the side of your cheek already making you feel comfortable.
“No need to worry yourself over me,”  he leans down and kisses you on the cheek,  smiling sweetly at you, a warm feeling spreads through your chest. 
“I've already dealt with everything.”
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scorpioriesling · 3 days
Text
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Dream Come True
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Pairing(s): Lucien x reader
Warnings: light swearing
Summary: When Elain rejects the mating bond, the High Lord of Autumn spares no sympathy for his youngest son (well… you know. Anyways.) Hosting a ball with all the most eligible maidens in the court, you are of course eligible and happy to attend, wishing from afar for so many years — but, you decide to take a different approach to hopefully win his heart.
SR’s Note: *sigh* this is my current favorite art for my favorite fox boy… did I stare at it for way too long? Maybe. Anyways, here’s the fic. Enjoy! xoxo
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚: *
Honestly, you couldn't understand what the fuck was wrong with the Archeron girl.
First of all, she was blessed enough to look the way she did -- not that you wanted to look just like her, you would thank the Mother every day and night for blessing you with such lovely parents of your own who'd only pass on their best genes to you. But, she didn't have to try so damn hard to catch the eye of every male in Prythian, just with the swoosh of her skirt or the toss of her hair over her shoulder.
It sure caught the eye of the youngest Vanserra.
Her mate.
Don't even begin with her newfound Cauldron-blessed gift, either. It seemed like everywhere she went, all that was talked about was, "Ooh! Elain, the seer" or "have you been seeing anything new?" blah blah blah, I mean really -- how much longer will we hyperfixate on this? On her? Long gone was talk of her younger sister, the one who literally saved the land from Hybern's hand. You wondered if she ever grew as tired of her sister's attention as you did, not that you knew the Cursebreaker personally.
However, none of it mattered the 28th night of September. You'd been working that evening in the Autumn Palace, completing the tasks assigned as the Lady of Autumn's first assistant when you heard probably the best rumors to ever grace your ears. Beron had been passing you in the hall with his oldest son Eris, and you spared both of them a nod as they passed. Eris returned the small smile, having known you for years, but you didn't expect much from his father, knowing how cruel he was even with his own wife. You also didn't expect to hear the conversation they were having, but you slowed your pace as they continued in the opposite direction down the corridor from you.
"The girl said she wanted the bond broken," Beron muttered in a menacing tone. Eris sighed, and your breath hitched.
"What do you think Lucien-" Eris started.
"I'm not asking Lucien what he thinks. We won't deal with some ignorant wench who doesn't know what she wants. I'm not surprised she doesn't want to deal with him, but I won't deal with the scandal of him going unmated..." Beron's cruel tone fades as the pair rounds the corner of the corridor, and you brace yourself on one of the credenzas along the wall for a moment. Elain wants to break the bond? There's no way. You look up, eyes catching on your reflection in the dimly lit mirror hung on the wall. Was she really so unhappy that she would ask to break something so sacred, with someone as special as Lucien?
You took a steadying breath, forcing your feet to keep carrying you and your completed task sheet to the Lady of Autumn's office. You could barely focus; what was Lucien going to do? How was he feeling? You remembered all of the times you'd stolen glances at him, all the memories of hearing his warm but rare laugher through these very halls with his brothers over the years. He wasn't around as much anymore, but that didn't stop the desire that still warmed your heart at the thought of him.
"Thank you for your assistance, Y/N," the Lady of Autumn's voice was a warm caress as you laid down the task sheet upon her desk. "You're free to go for the evening."
With a nod you made for the door, but instead of heading for the front of the palace, you made way for the back stairwell, one that led to the private bedrooms. You knew your way around this place as you'd worked here for years, becoming rather close with the family and the boys that lived here. You counted the doors: one, two, three on the right side, and gave the third door a soft knock. Within moments, it was unlatched and a familiar pair of mahogany eyes met yours.
"Oh... hello, Y/N," Eris steps back, allowing you into his room before his father caught on somehow that you were still here. You silently slipped inside, as you'd done so many times before and taken a seat on the edge of his mattress. He perched near the top by his pillows, and offerred a quizzical look. "What brings you-"
"I need to know. I need to know about Lucien." You cut in. Eris' face immediately softened in realization. You'd been in this position many a time, coming to Eris with your concerns about his brother and him confiding his own feelings in you. This is what drew the two of you so close and provided a friendship so precious you knew you had to keep secret, as Beron was unpredictable and could use it as a weapon in a time of his own need.
"Elain... she asked Helion today to break their bond. He told my father right after she'd requested it." His hand found yours, and you loosed a breath. Your heart constricted, only imagining what Lucien must be going through right now.
"And... and Lucien? Was he-" Eris only shakes his head. Your sadness turns to anger, and you yank your hand back. You rise from the bed, beginning to pace back and forth in his room as traitorous thoughts cloud your mind.
"So, he wasn't even there? He doesn't even know?" You say, voice rising in octave. Eris leans forward, pressing a forefinger to his lips and shushing you.
"Shhhh, he likely knows by now," he says soothingly. But it doesn't matter. You feel as though your rage is bubbling over like the milky substance of the Caldron.
"Yeah. You're right, he probably knows -- I'm sure it probably hurts pretty fuckin' bad when a cord inside of you just... just..." You're throwing your hands in the air, fists clenched and shaking. "...breaks right in half out of nowhere-" Eris is instantly on his feet, taking both of your wrists in his, eyes searching yours in all seriousness.
"Y/N." He says solemnly. "You have to calm down. Someone is going to hear you, okay?" He says calmly. Your breath is heavy, chest rising and falling rapidly as his hands still grip your wrists mid-air. He lets go, moving one hand to brush the stray hairs sticking to your face behind your ear, clinging to your forehead with the sweat you've worked up. "Just, take a deep breath, okay? I'm not too keen on it either, but this isn't my situation to have an opinion on, alright? We have to try and remember that."
You take his words into consideration, wiping your perspirating hands on your smock and breathing deeply. He takes a step back from you, allowing you your space and returning to sit on the bed. You follow, rubbing your hands over your face in defeat.
"My father doesn't want this to be a big thing," he continues, and you move your hands to look at him. He peers at the patch of bedsheets between the two of you, appearing to zone out as he continues. "He thinks if he finds someone else for Lucien quickly, the whole bond "thing" won't cause too much talk and Lu will be able to get over it faster or something." You roll your eyes, scoffing.
"That's the most rediculous thing I've ever heard." You say.
"I know." He replies. You shake your head, biting your bottom lip.
"What's he planning to do? Line someone up for Lucien to wed instead?" You ask. You really don't want to know the answer -- hearing he had a mate was already heart-wrenching enough, now hearing he would be betrothed to another would be even worse.
"He's planning to have a courting ceremony in two days, in the palace," he says. You perk up.
"Oh?"
"Mhm," he continues, eyes sliding to yours with a mischevious grin. "Now, don't get your hopes up, but he's only inviting the most eligible maidens and High Fae to attend, but anyone in attendance would technically have the right to Lucien's hand, if he accepts it. I've known a sly fox like you long enough that-"
"You know I'll find a way in." You finish. He chuckles.
"You also have to get him to say yes." You heart sinks a little. With Eris, its always been so easy -- the conversations, the getting along, the understanding. But, you started working here not too long before Lucien was on his way out the door. You could only pray you would be able to talk to him the same as his brother.
"Don't worry about it, Y/N. I'm sure when Lu sees how charming you can be, he'd be stupid not to take your hand." Eris flashes an award-winning smile, and you can't help but feel hopeful by his tone.
You only hope you can pull this off without a hitch.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚
The deep violet dress you wore clung to every curve, the soft fabric scrunching in all the right places as it brushed the against your legs and drug along the leaf-littered ground behind you. You'd allowed your hair out of your usual braid for tonight, the long wavy tendrils sweeping down your exposed back, locks illuminated by the moonlight. You had to admit, you did appreciate the way you looked when you put in some effort -- you'd do it everyday, only for him.
"Y/N," Eris' soft whisper-shout echoes from the illuminated doorway as you round the corner of the palace, just where you'd arranged to meet. Turns out, sneaking into the ball was a lot easier than you'd thought; Beron was too busy in the throne room to pay any mind to where his oldest son was, which of course, was helping you enter through one of the unguarded back entrances.
"Wow," he breathes, pulling the heavy door closed and ushering you inside. "You're a vision." You blush, swatting his arm.
"Well, while I appreciate the compliment," you state. "Let's hope your brother reciprocates the sentiment."
Eris chuckles. "He would be a damned fool not to." You followed closely behind him as he led you down corridor after corridor, some unfamiliar at first as he peered around the corners before leading you down the halls. The sound of people talking rang out, and you heard the approaching throne room, recognising more of your surroundings. You placed a hand on Eris' arm, the fabric of his ornate jacket rough under your touch.
"You go in first," you say.
"Are you sure?" He asks, a tender look in your friend's eye.
You give him a knowing look. "Yes, your father would be suspicious if we walk in together." He nods, opening the doors a slit and slipping inside. You take a deep breath, wringing your hands and grounding yourself once more. You were finally going to have a chance, a chance to see him again tonight - and try your very best to not mess this all up.
Opening the door, you inch inside, hoping to not catch the eye of Beron or the Lady of Autumn -- youwere, after all, not "technically" invited to this thing after all. Luckily, you'd waited long enough that their attention had drifted back to the dancefloor and Eris had made it to their side by now, and only he was looking to you as you slid along the wall noiselessly blending in with the crowd.
Your gaze searched the scene, looking for a certain redhead. Of course, Eris stood out among the crowd of beautiful maidens, all adorning lovely full gowns and makeup much more extravagant than your own. Guess you didn't get the memo. Nonetheless, you see a few of Lucien's brothers making their rounds as well, girls shamelessly flirting with them too. However, the Vanserra you were seeking was nowhere to be found.
That is, until a few moments later when Beron rose and cleared his throat.
"Good evening to everyone," he began and the room quieted. You slunk deeper into the shadows, trying to remain hidden as he peered out into the crowd.
"Thank you all for attending this rather, special, evening," he chuckles. Eris rolls his eyes at his father's indecency. You can't help but do the same as a few girls near you giggle in excitement.
"I would like to present my son of the evening, the most eligible and willing bachelor, Lucien Vanserra," he says. Lucien stalks out from the entrance beyond the thrones, and many of the ladies in the room gasp and giggle. You can't help but widen your eyes at his presence. You had to admit, his beauty was incomparable.
"Allow the ball to commence!" Beron ends his stupid announcement with that, and Lucien's stoic expression has your gaze dropping, remembering how hard this must be from him. Women all around are fluttering about, some gossiping, some flanking his side immediately -- Gods, that must be so suffocating. Your gaze meets Eris', and he tosses you a wink, motioning with his hands in a way that indictates give him some time. You then watch him glance at the incessant ladies pouncing on Lucien, and see him grimace and shake his head. You giggle, and head for the table of treats along the wall. If you have to wait your time, that's fine -- you'd been playing the long game for this long anyways, what was a few more hours?
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚
Yes, you'd been crushing from afar for so long -- but now that you shared air, it was a lot harder to stay on a long leash.
Watching him share dance after dance with beautiful fae after beautiful fae was... well, hurtful. You knew what you wanted, well... what you damn near needed, but you also knew that you needed to wait for the right moment.
What did you have that these ladies didn't?
All night, you looked around, comparing -- they were gorgeous, all High Fae, all much more glamorous than you. But, did they know him? No. Did they have much of a personality, or were they just here in hopes of being married off to the High Lord's newly-available son?
You needed to take the different approach.
And, hiding out by the food tables would not get you noticed.
You knew by the look on Lucien's face that he was getting tired of dancing the same dance, over and over and over. Having the same conversations, over. And over. And over. Sooner or later, he'd need an escape, and you knew this place like the back of your hand.
So where would he go?
You slipped outside, to the vast expanse of the private balcony off the throne room and rested your arms on the marble railing. Eris didn't miss your exit, suggesting to his brother a breath of fresh air, which he was happy to oblige in. You would have to remember to thank him later.
"Uhh, miss? This is a private balcony-"
You turn, hair brushing over your shoulder with the movement. Your eyes meet his, and heat floods your cheeks at the realization that the moment has finally come. The moonlight illuminates every russet freckle on his skin, the color matching his iris as his eyes widen in his own realization.
"Y/N?" He whispers, taking a tentative step toward you. You crack a half smile. You shrug your shoulders.
"In the flesh."
He walks quickly over to you, gasping and wrapping his arms around your waist. He pulls you in so tight, and your arms wrap around his neck. He laughs against your neck, the sound as light and magnificent as the stars above. You inhale deep, his scent of amber and sunshine warming you to the core.
"I can't believe this, I... I haven't seen you in forever, I mean... how... wait, how are you here?" He chuckles again, releasing you. You wish he would hold you forever, but you pull back to look at him. He's still smiling down at you, a mere foot from you now, his hands still resting on the small of your waist.
"Well... you know I would never be invited to this sort of thing but... I've never exactly played by the rules." You wink at him, and he rolls his eyes, laughing heartly once more. He inhales fully and lets it go, gazing once more at you.
"Ohhhh, Y/N, it sure is good to see you again. And no, you never have played by any kind of rules," he shakes his head, and you register your hands still softly bracing his biceps. You grin up at him, and he seems to realize the intimacy at the same time you do. He releases you in that moment, moving to the balcony and loosing a breath, looking out at the Autumn Court beyond. You move to stand next to him, feeling his body heat even from a few feet away.
"Can you believe my dad would do such a rediculous thing like this?" He asks after a few beats of silence. You chew your lip, sneaking a glance at him. His jaw is tight as he continues to look straight ahead.
"Honestly... yeah. He is... he is somethin'." You say. Lucien turns, facing you once more.
"Has he gotten worse since I left?" He asks. You think for a moment, and his eyes search yours.
"I mean... I don't know. I talk more with your mom. He's still, well, cruel, not with me in particular, but with just everyone, I guess." He swears under his breath.
"I should have never left." He says. You place a hand over his and he glances down at it, then back out at the court, swallowing thickly. "None of this would have ever happened. I would have never met Elain. It never would have gotten worse here. I would have never-"
"Hey hey hey, don't say that," you say. He gazes at you again. You smile kindly at him. "We're all okay here -- the only thing that got worse was how much we all missed you." You trace a vein atop his hand and he breathes in deep, eyes fluttering down, then back up to yours, growing darker. "Well... how much I missed you, anyways."
He smiles softly. "Is that so?" He says quietly, and you nod.
"And... Elain is... so... so blind for not seeing the amazing man she's missing out on..." you lift your gaze to meet his eyes, and he slides his empty hand to your hip, pulling you close. He pulls you so close that you're sharing a breath as he practically whispers the next words into your mouth.
"Honestly... I might be glad she broke the bond. She is nothing compared to what I've been missing out on."
His lips press to yours, and you can only feel a rush of golden fireworks inside as his fingers brush through your hair, moving to cup your jaw and stroke your cheek. His lips move, kissing you sesually as your hands hold onto his shoulders, finally reveling in the moment you'd only dreamed would come true.
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* ✧・゚
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14dayswithyou · 2 days
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Meowdy Saint! ^^ lolol hello hello o/ hope you are doing good!!
So this masterpiece of a game has been invading my mind with ZERO chill lately which directly translated to me coming up with a TON of questions orz I really didn't realize how many I ended up compiling lol
If you don't feel like answering this many please feel absolutely free to ignore this ask or only answer the ones you like the most, the last thing I want is for you to feel overwhelmed! ^^
ALRIGHT LET'S-A GO
-do Rendacted's memories remain intact when he resets the day or do his wipe too with everyone else's? Also is there an in-universe answer for why he has these glitchy powers or is he just Built Different™?
-if angel made it VERY clear that they would be mad asf and prolly even start hating and leave Ren/[REDACTED] if he were to hurt their friends(or killing people bc this man needs to chill fr), would he listen to them? Bc I know that if he touches Violet, Elanor, Kiara or god forbid Moth I'm personally deleting his kneecaps 🥰
-since it seems to me that Ren/[REDACTED] is only kinda meh at cooking I was wondering if he actually made the not burnt pancakes in day 3 or if he had some store bought ones that he passed off as his own lol
-does he know how to give massages? :00
-during day 1, how did Ren come up with a book on the local flora?? It seems like such a random topic to pick when put on the spot without already having a genuine interest in it lmao
-if I understood correctly Maple should be Jae's dog right?? Did you have a specific breed or age in mind when creating her? I got curious because in my head she automatically popped up as a young australian shepherd to match with Jae's hyperactive dumbass energy lol❀⸜(˶´ ˘ `˶)⸝❀
-staying on the dog topic lol, in day 1 when angel gets up from the couch to get Ren the inflatable mattress(iirc) and he follows right behind them i immediately thought he acted like a puppy lmao. So would he mind being called 'puppy' as a pet name?
(I am not sure if this⬇️ questions falls under character deaths, if it does I really apologize and absolutely feel free to ignore it ^^)
-from an ask from last year it seems [REDACTED] would ultimately kill angel if there was ultimately not way to enter in their life?? Gotta say I was very taken aback by this, would this still be the case after a year of building more to his character? (Ok I went back to check the ask again but I can't for the life of me find it anymore maybe I dreamt it up idk😭😭 im really sorry if that is the case jdkslajdl)
-uuhh I know there is already a lot in this ask(im seriously sorry orz), but I was wondering if we will eventually get an SFW alphabet for Ren/[REDACTED] for the folks who don't care about the nasty 👉👈
-THIS IS THE LAST THING I PROMISE 👹 will there be a guide to get all the endings? I'm not sure if there is one already and in that case I missed it 100%
Also I find it ironic how the fandom is trying to find out every single aspect of Ren/[REDACTED]'s character the same way he must do with angel lmao
ALRIGHT THATS ALL IM SO SORRY FOR ASKING SO MUCH THE REN BRAINROT HOURS ARE SO REAL IM LOSING BRAINCELLS orz Remember to take care of yourself drink water and take breaks!! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧
(Also sorry if some phrases don't make sense, english isn't my first language as I am 🤌 lolol)
✦゜ANSWERED: Under da cut because this got long >:3
-do Rendacted's memories remain intact when he resets the day or do his wipe too with everyone else's? Also is there an in-universe answer for why he has these glitchy powers or is he just Built Different™? Ren's memories remain intact!! I mean... He remembers each time you get a bad end and sometimes says something different... >:3 There is also an in-universe reason as to why he has his abilities — I won't spoil anything, but his real name (along with River's and one other character) have a reeeeally big tell. But what this tell is is for me to know and you to find out >:3
-if angel made it VERY clear that they would be mad asf and prolly even start hating and leave Ren/[REDACTED] if he were to hurt their friends(or killing people bc this man needs to chill fr), would he listen to them? Bc I know that if he touches Violet, Elanor, Kiara or god forbid Moth I'm personally deleting his kneecaps 🥰 Ren (and by extension [REDACTED]) knows not to harm anyone if he knows you won't like it — and even then — he won't actively show that murderous side of him in the first place. To Angel, Ren is just a timid, normal guy.
-since it seems to me that Ren/[REDACTED] is only kinda meh at cooking I was wondering if he actually made the not burnt pancakes in day 3 or if he had some store bought ones that he passed off as his own lol Ren is actually good at cooking, he's just a bit out of touch since he doesn't normally cook for himself! It's normally microwave meals or takeout for him... ^^; And yes, Ren did burn and burn the pancakes in Day 3 — he was distracted by something on his phone :3
Bonus cut Day 3 content: I took out the scene where Ren started to profusely apologise for burning the pancake because he often had to cook when he was younger. Given the dynamic of his family and the environment he grew up in, Ren didn't have much room to make mistakes ;n; I cut this scene out because I felt bad ksgskd So y'all get to have flustered, happy Ren instead!!
-does he know how to give massages? :00 If that was one of Angel's interests or desires, then sure!! ^^
-during day 1, how did Ren come up with a book on the local flora?? It seems like such a random topic to pick when put on the spot without already having a genuine interest in it lmao Someone else likes flora too, and it sure would be funny if Ren (eventually) starts to mimic certain traits and interests of the person you have the highest affinity/relationship points with in order to make himself look more appealing… >:3c
-if I understood correctly Maple should be Jae's dog right?? Did you have a specific breed or age in mind when creating her? I got curious because in my head she automatically popped up as a young australian shepherd to match with Jae's hyperactive dumbass energy lol❀⸜(˶´ ˘ `˶)⸝❀ It was mentioned in Jae's lore post (I'll link it here once I find it), but Maple is a Labrador! (Leon would be Jae's Australian Shepherd hehe) In my mind, Maple is only 2 or 3 years old, but that wouldn't really fit the official timeframe... ^^; Jae adopted Maple during high school so he wouldn't feel lonely at home, and it's been over 6+ years since then.... hgdshjg
-staying on the dog topic lol, in day 1 when angel gets up from the couch to get Ren the inflatable mattress(iirc) and he follows right behind them i immediately thought he acted like a puppy lmao. So would he mind being called 'puppy' as a pet name? Angel affectionately calls Ren a puppy during the scene in Day 1 where they meet up after work, so that nickname definitely could work!
-from an ask from last year it seems [REDACTED] would ultimately kill angel if there was ultimately not way to enter in their life?? Gotta say I was very taken aback by this, would this still be the case after a year of building more to his character? (Ok I went back to check the ask again but I can't for the life of me find it anymore maybe I dreamt it up idk😭😭 im really sorry if that is the case jdkslajdl) aaa I think you might be mistaking that ask for something else? ;v; [REDACTED] would NEVER harm Angel in any capacity, and they're a very patient person. Even if it took decades for Angel to fall in love with him, they'll wait.
-uuhh I know there is already a lot in this ask(im seriously sorry orz), but I was wondering if we will eventually get an SFW alphabet for Ren/[REDACTED] for the folks who don't care about the nasty 👉👈 You're fine!! And I'm open to doing that! I'll add it to my list hehe
-THIS IS THE LAST THING I PROMISE 👹 will there be a guide to get all the endings? I'm not sure if there is one already and in that case I missed it 100% I've shared a spreadsheet that lists all the available choices, the points you earn from each of them, and the endings you can get — however it's only available on Discord and I don't really want to share it outside of the server and potentially put it in the hands of minors. Sorry!!
Also I find it ironic how the fandom is trying to find out every single aspect of Ren/[REDACTED]'s character the same way he must do with angel lmao Hehe >:3 There's a loooot of lore that won't ever be mentioned in the game (since it doesn't seem fitting/I don't see a reason to), so I'm happy to provide it here!
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scoonsalicious · 3 days
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7.1 Major
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader
Summary: Lily McIntyre, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, discussion of feelings, nudity, mentions of some sexy stuff.
Word Count: 3.2k
Previously On...: Idk; it's been so long. Who can even remember? Just kidding-- Bucky blew off his plans for a 'friend-date' with Lily to talk to you about what happened that morning.
A/N: And we're back!
Hi, besties! I confess to not getting as much writing done as I had hoped on my break-- cursed writer's block! Then, last night, I ended up scrapping most of the writing I did do and started over, lol. However, I've got a bit of a back log again, and a four day weekend starting tonight, and now that I feel reinvigorated with the story, we'll be able to resume our regularly scheduled program!
If you ever feel so inclined to support my work, hop on over to buy me a coffee; it's much appreciated! <3
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
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You pulled up to the destination Bucky had sent you as dusk was falling. Langston Park. A weird spot for dinner, you thought, but you’d double-checked the location with Bucky, and he’d assured you that you were in the right place. 
Glancing at your map, you noticed that the pin he’d sent you was a little ways up a trail. You parked your truck and double checked your bag to make sure you had your pepper spray at the ready– not that you were afraid that Bucky was going to harm you– just that, a woman alone in the woods at dusk? You could never be too careful. It actually went against your better judgment to go in there at all, but you trusted that Bucky wouldn’t lead you into danger. 
If I do come across something unexpected, you thought to yourself, please let it be the bear.
You cautiously made your way up the trail, using the nearly useless flashlight feature on your phone to keep yourself from tripping over anything. It was difficult adjusting your eyesight from the bright light of the map you were following on your phone screen to the darkness gathering around you. After you’d been walking for about fifteen or so minutes, you had to turn left to go off-trail, cutting off your access to the dwindling daylight even more. You gently pushed branches of leaves aside as you made your way through the woods, until you noticed a soft, orange glow coming from up ahead of you.
When you broke through the tree line, your breath caught in your throat. The pin Bucky had sent you had led you to a small clearing nestled along a stream, with a melodious waterfall cascading down into a pool that held a handful of floating lanterns. The entire clearing was lit with hanging lanterns that gently swayed from the branches of the surrounding trees, washing the entire space with low, warm light. Spread out on the ground was a large blanket with some throw pillows, extra blankets, and a picnic hamper. And in the center of the clearing, crouched Bucky. He’d appeared to have just finished setting up his phone to stream some soft music. The entire tableau was the most romantic thing you’d ever seen.
“Hey,” you called softly as you turned your flashlight off, dropped your phone into your bag, and made your way into the clearing.
Bucky stood and turned to face you, a wide smile spreading across his face. “Major, hi,” he breathed. “Thank you so much for coming.”
“Did you do all this for me?” you asked in awe as you looked around, taking in your surroundings. You could feel a lump form in the back of your throat, and you had to actively tell yourself not to cry. No one had ever done anything so absolutely romantic for you in your entire life. Not once had Connor ever made a fraction of the effort Bucky had made tonight.
Bucky’s face took on a look of panic. “Is it too much?” he asked, nervously glancing around as though he were trying to judge it anew through your eyes to see what you might find wrong with it.
You smiled, reaching for his hand to offer a squeeze of reassurance. “It’s lovely,” you said. “No one has ever done something so amazing for me, Bucky. Thank you.” 
Bucky visibly relaxed at your words. “Figured I owed you something special, to make up for this morning.” He motioned to the blanket, guiding you to sit down with him. “I brought dinner,” he said, opening up the basket. Inside were several subs, a couple of bottles of lemonade, and a few bags of chips. “Sweet onion teriyaki chicken with cucumbers, extra pickles, and red wine vinegar,” Bucky said, handing you a sandwich. You held the sandwich to you for a moment, your chest filling with warmth at the fact that he’d remembered your offhand comment about your favorite sandwich. 
You put the wrapped sub down on the blanket in front of you. “Could we talk before we eat?” you asked him. “I’ve got some things I want to clear up first.”
Bucky swallowed and nodded, putting down the sandwich he had gotten for himself and looked up at you through his lashes. “Go ahead, sugar,” he said.
You took a breath. “I get why you didn’t tell Lily about me,” you said slowly. “It’s new, and we’re not even really anything. So, what’s there to tell her, really? Plus, she and I didn’t really have the best first impressions of one another, so that part, I understand. What I don’t get is why you felt you needed to lie about being out on a date at all.” Bucky opened his mouth to say something, but you weren’t finished. 
“I can’t even begin to tell you how many calls I got toward the end of my marriage that went just like the one you had with Lily last night. All the times Connor assured me he was just “out with the boys,” when, in reality, he was with his mistress. So, I guess, hearing you tell Lily you were with Sam for a ‘guys’ night’ was kind of triggering.” You sighed, heaving your shoulders. “I need to know, and I need you to be honest with me: Is there something going on between the two of you? Is that why you felt the need to lie to her about being out with me?”
Bucky shook his head vehemently and made a face of mild disgust. “Major, no– there’s never been anything between us,” he said. “I won’t lie, Lily is very important to me– as a friend– she was the first new one I made in almost eighty years, and she stuck by me when I was going through a really difficult time in my life, when I really hadn’t given her much of a reason to, but in terms of anything romantic, or sexual? Never.”
You tilted your head, considering his words. He seemed sincere, though if you had been a good judge of when a man you had feelings for was lying to your face, your marriage to Connor would probably only have been a fraction as long as it was.
“Alright,” you said, choosing in the moment to believe him, “so, if you’re as close as you say, and there’s nothing romantic between the two of you, it makes it even stranger that you lied to her about being out on a date last night.”
Bucky looked down, toying with a loose thread on the blanket you both sat on. “At the time,” he said, not looking up at you, “not telling her the truth seemed like a good idea. It didn’t really cross my mind that I was lying… more like ‘just not telling her the truth yet.’ I was really looking forward to seeing you again, doll,” he told you, his eyes now rising to meet yours, “ and telling Lil… well, it felt like I was needlessly complicating things."
You let out an exasperated sigh. “None of that explains to me the why behind it, Bucky,” you said. “Why would telling your best friend complicate things? 
“I just didn’t want her getting involved in our business before the two of us even knew what our business was,” he said, as if that made everything clear.
“But, shouldn’t your best friend knowing your business be, I dunno, a good thing?” you asked him in frustration, wanting to reach out and shake him. You felt like you were going around in circles. “Shouldn’t she be happy for you?”
“Of course!” he exclaimed. “Of course she’ll be happy for me. It’s just…” He heaved a heavy sigh. “Lily’s always had… opinions about every girl I’ve ever dated, and she’s never made it a point of keeping them to herself. I mean, most of the time, she ends up being spot on, and the relationship flops, but this…” he moved to place his hand over yours where it rested on the blanket, “with you? I wanted to enjoy it before she makes those opinions known.”
You turned your hand over and squeezed his. The full truth of the situation had clicked into place for you at his words, and the realization brought both intense clarity and an all too familiar heartache. “All my life, I’ve been… impulsive,” you told him. “I jump head first into things, without thinking about the consequences. It’s how I got into the Army, ended up with Connor, hell, even how I started my business. Sometimes it works out, but…” you  heaved a sigh, “usually it tends to blow up spectacularly in my face. I don’t want this to blow up in my face, Bucky.” 
The confusion in Bucky’s face as he took in your words was evident. “What are you saying, doll?” he asked.
You took a moment, considering your next words carefully. “I… I really like you,” you began as a wide grin broke out across his face. “Probably more than I should for a person I just met a few days ago, but the truth of it is, I’ve seen this story play out before, and I’m not sure I could handle opening my heart to you, only to have you leave me for the best friend you swore I’d never have to worry about.”
Bucky took both your hands in his own, a look of desperation crossing his face. “Sugar,” he said, then cleared his throat. “Major. I don’t know how many other ways I can tell you that I just don’t see Lily that way,” he said. “Hell, I don’t think I’ve ever seen any dame the way I see you. You’ve got me feeling all kinds of ways I’ve never felt before.”
His words were sweet, and you felt your heart soften, but you had to remind yourself: you’d heard words just like it before. “Look,” you said, pulling your hands away from his, “maybe you don’t , but it seems pretty obvious, even as an outsider, that her feelings for you are stronger than just friendship. I don’t want to lose my heart to you if you’re going to realize that you belong with someone you’ve known for years, instead of a one-night stand that went on for too long.”
Bucky reeled back as if you’d slapped him and closed his eyes in a grimace. “That is never,” he began, a pained expression clouding his handsome face, “ever all that you could be to me, Major.” When he opened them again, his eyes were boring into yours, the blue gone cobalt in the growing night. “I’m not going to wake up one day and decide I want to be with Lily. I’ve had four years in close proximity with her for those feelings to develop, and they never have. I honestly can’t see why that would change, especially now that I’ve met you.”
God, you wanted to believe him, but you’d already played this role and it had nearly destroyed you, despite how nonchalantly you acted about it. “Does she know that, Bucky? Because, to be completely honest with you, on the night we met, both Nat and Wanda advised me not to get involved with you, because of her.”
His face blanched at the admission. “What?! Why would they say that?”
“They warned me,” you clarified, hoping that you weren’t betraying any trust with your new friends and only feeling mildly bad that you were divulging Lily’s secret, “that Lily wasn’t a ‘girl’s girl;’ she was a ‘Bucky’s girl,’ only, you didn’t know it.”
“But she–” he spluttered, “she– we– she never– she’s never said anything. She’s never acted…” He was at a loss for words, and you could tell that the information had genuinely taken him by surprise. Despite what Lily may feel for him, it didn’t seem like he ever suspected it.
“Maybe I should leave you to think that over,” you said, making motions to start standing up. “Thanks for the sandwich.” Before you could even get your legs under you, though, Bucky reached out a hand and grabbed your wrist.
“Wait!” he exclaimed, gently tugging you back down to the blanket. “Why are you leaving?”
You shrugged, confused. “I figured you’d want some time,” you told him. “Decide what you want to do about her feelings.”
Bucky looked at you like you were crazy. “Doll, in what world do any feelings Lily may have about me concern how I feel about you?”
“I just assumed…” you began, but he interrupted you.
“Assumed what? That just because she’s got a crush on me, I’m gonna ignore this thing between you and I? That I’m gonna develop feelings for her, outta nowhere, I might add, and just forget all about you?”
You shrugged your shoulders sheepishly. “Yeah, actually,” you said.
“You idiot,” Bucky said, shaking his head  with a gentle smile and a soft laugh. He put a hand behind your head and pulled you forward until your foreheads were leaning together. “I sincerely mean this when I tell you I don’t give a fuck about Lily’s feelings,” he said.
You both widened your eyes at the perceived callousness of the statement. 
“Fuck,” Bucky backpedaled, backing his head away from yours a little “that came out soundin’ awful, and definitely not how I meant it.” He ran a hand nervously through his hair. “Of course I care about her feelings– she’s my friend– I just mean… shit. Just, obviously, I feel bad if me not reciprocatin’ hurts her, but there’s nothin’ I can really do for it, y’know? Because it doesn’t change my feelings, and it’s not gonna change my feelings. 
And shit, you believed him. 
“You know what?” Bucky said, as if an idea had suddenly come to him. “Here.” He reached under the collar of his shirt and pulled out his military dog tags. Lifting them over his head, he slowly draped them around your neck.
“Bucky,” you said, fingering the embossed metal, “what…?”
“Think of it this way,” he said, “you, of all people, know what these tags mean to a soldier. Since I came outta cryo, came back to myself, not a single person has worn them, ‘cept for me. I’ve had girlfriends ask– hell, Lily’s asked– but it never felt right.” He brushed a strand of hair back from where it had fallen into your face when you’d looked down at the tags. “But with you, it feels right. So, if you’re afraid that I’m gonna up and decide that I’d rather be with Lily, or fuck, anyone else but you, I want you to look at those tags and remember that you’re the one I’m picking, Major.”
You swallowed. You did know what those tags meant. Commitment. Trust. An unbreakable bond. Wordlessly, you reached around to the back of your neck, unclasping the chain that rested against your skin. 
Bucky watched your motions carefully. “Yeah,” he said, licking his lips nervously, “that was probably me moving too fast, huh? I get it– you don’t have to wear them if—”
“Shut up,” you said gently, as you removed your own dog tags from around your neck and fastened them around his. “I don’t need to wear two sets, and your neck looked so lonely without one.”
Bucky held up one of the tags so that he could examine it, and you caught the moment he registered your name and information catching the candlelight.
“Sugar,” he said, his voice cracking on the nickname. 
“You’re not the only one making a choice, Bucky,” you assured him.
He leaned in closer, taking your lips with his own, the kiss filled with the fire you’d come to associate with him, and only him. 
When you pulled apart, he rested his forehead against yours, and you could make out the glassy sheen of unshed tears in his eyes. “This is perfect. Thank you.”
You admired the way they hung from his neck for a moment, and were overcome with the sudden urge to touch them. You placed a hand over the dog tags, your name, now resting over his pounding heart. Bucky cupped his own hand over yours, pressing it against his chest.
“These look awfully handsome on you, Sergeant,” you told him with a soft smile. Bucky let out a low groan and you looked up at him, eyes questioning. “What is it?” you asked him.
Bucky’s face turned bashful and he shook his head. “Nuh uh,” he said. “Forget it.”
Oh, you weren’t going to have any of that. “Come on, Bucky,” you said, playfully poking him in his rock hard stomach. “You can tell me anything. I’m wearing your tags now,” you added in a singsong voice. “We’re practically going steady.”
Bucky’s gaze on you darkened, and he tugged at his lip with his teeth. “Okay then, if you’re sure you really wanna know.” You mirrored him, biting your lip and nodded eagerly. Of course you wanted to know what was going through his head to cause him to make such sexy sounds. “Just imagining what you’d look like wearing nothing but the tags, sugar,” he responded, his voice a low, husky whisper. “Bet it’d be the prettiest thing I ever saw.”
Well, if you weren’t going to take that as an invitation. Raising an eyebrow in his direction, you got up so that you were standing before him. Bucky moved forward, as if he were going to follow you up, a question ready on his lips, but you leaned down and gently pushed him back to the blanket, so he was propping himself up on his elbows.
Not once breaking eye contact, you slid your hands to the hem of your shirt, slowly dragging it up, over your head before tossing it to the side. Next, you toed off your shoes while you worked the buttons of your jean shorts, letting them slide down your thighs until you were standing in just your balconette and panties. You didn’t even care that you were in the middle of a public park and you were undressing for a man. All that mattered was that you were undressing for this man, and in the moment, you were willing to do almost anything he asked of you.
Bucky’s eyes roamed your body from head to toe and back again, but you weren’t finished. He’d said ‘nothing but the tags,’ after all. Reaching behind your back, you skillfully unhooked your bra, but didn’t pull it off, instead letting it sit on your chest while you slowly shimmined your panties down your thighs and kicking them off to join the rest of your discarded clothes. Bucky’s breath hitched as he took in your near nakedness, and you almost giggled at the visible tenting taking place in his jeans. 
Clutching the bra to your chest, as if you were shy, you slowly got down on your knees and crawled up Bucky’s thighs. Finally, you let the bra fall away, and Bucky’s wide eyes never left your breasts as he licked his lips. You palmed him through the fabric of his pants.
“I believe I once said something about wanting this down my throat,” you told him with a wicked smile.
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