#i do not hope for anything ( broken trust is not easy to build up again ) and it's not the best idea to speak out about it in posts maybe
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Request: Hop & Joyce don't really like or trust Steve & he knows it. He can tell by their behavior towards him. Post spring break from Hell, Steve tears into them both after they insinuate that it's his fault for the kids being hurt. Steve YELLING at them in front of the party bc he is injured more grievously than the kids & he once again protected them, to the detriment of himself.
Joyce & Hop are forced to acknowledge that their behavior was cruel. And they have to apologize but Steve doesn't accept their apology straight away.
I am usually such a sucker for Hopper adopting Steve and treating him as his own that this was really difficult. Like, maybe top 5 most difficult things I have ever written. It's kind of short, but I wanted more of the focus to be on people standing up for Steve and Steve standing up for himself than the actual angsty part. My darling, I hope it lives up to expectations! -Mickala ❤️
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“I guess I just don’t understand how Max ended up like this if Steve was supposed to be protecting them all.”
Joyce’s words echoed in Steve’s head.
She was whispering to Hopper in the waiting room, but it was surprisingly quiet, and easy to hear just about anything.
The kids were asleep on the couches, waiting for any news on Max or Eddie, but the nurses told them it could be hours. Hours were a long time to wait when someone was bleeding out and the other someone had multiple broken bones and was unconscious.
Steve felt untethered, his connection to the earth cut the moment he saw what happened to Eddie, pushed into a dangerous orbit when he saw what happened to Max.
“He’s never really let me down like this. Did you hear Dustin say he thinks he was distracted by Eddie?” Hopper asked quietly.
“What did he mean by that?” Joyce paused. “Oh. Do you think so?” Steve couldn’t see their faces, couldn’t see the way they were having a silent conversation within a conversation. “It wouldn’t be the first time Steve let his romantic feelings get in the way of their safety.”
And that really wasn’t fair.
It wasn’t fair because he always put these kids who weren’t even his first whenever he could. It wasn’t fair because it wasn’t his job to be perfect. It wasn’t fair because they were the adults who should have been here to help and they weren’t.
He could feel tears building up, his vision getting just blurry enough that he knew he needed to walk away or he would start actually crying, and he couldn’t let anyone see that.
Especially not Joyce and Hopper.
Apparently, they already thought so little of him, he couldn’t possibly show them that he was struggling now.
“I think we’ll have to have a talk with the kids about trusted adults. They seem to rely on him for a lot and maybe if we just explain to them that Steve can’t handle it-”
“Excuse me, Mr. Hopper?” A nurse, thankfully, interrupted them.
Steve turned to see a young nurse, probably barely older than him, standing in the entranceway to the waiting room.
Hopper walked over to her, actually whispering this time, as if what was being said right now was a secret, but not the way he felt about Steve.
He glanced over at Steve, then nodded to the nurse. He called Joyce over to them, whispered something, then they both looked at Steve.
He hated what was happening. He was used to being a disappointment to adults, but in a silent way. His parents weren’t really ever around long enough to show their disappointment for long. Seeing it now, on the faces of people he respected and wanted to impress, hurt.
Hopper started walking over to him, his face serious.
“They have Max stable. She may not wake up from the coma, but they’re hoping she makes a turn for the better soon. Eddie woke up a few minutes ago while they were trying to stitch him up and he kept yelling for you. He isn’t quite stable yet. He passed back out as they were trying to put him on oxygen.”
“But they’re both alive?”
“For now.”
“Can I see Max?”
“I don’t think that’s a great idea right now. They’re trying to reach her mom, but the phone lines keep going down. I’m standing in as the adult responsible until she can be contacted.”
“So now you want to be the adult responsible? Not any other time when we needed you?” Erica said from behind them.
She’d been asleep with Lucas and El only a minute ago.
“Erica, it’s fine. I’ll just wait with you guys.”
“No, Steve, it’s not fine.” Erica put her hands on her hips, scowled up at Hopper and Joyce, who had just joined them. “Steve looks out for us every day. Even when the world isn’t trying to end. He drives us to school or from school or to the arcade, he pays for our food at the diner all the time, probably spends all his paychecks on us. And where are the parents? They don’t even know where we are most of the time.”
“But-” Joyce started to interrupt until Erica held up her hand.
“You left your kids to fly to Russia when you knew something weird was going on. You could have died, and then what? You know who would have stepped in? Steve. Because that’s what he does for us. Do you know one of his worst concussions was because he was protecting Lucas and Max from Billy? You know he drove Max everywhere she needed to go all year because she didn’t wanna be around anyone else? How about the fact that without him, we wouldn’t have even been able to get Eddie back here? But sure, blame him for this. It totally makes sense to point the finger at the one person who has protected us over and over again.”
Steve was crying.
The other kids were starting to wake up from her voice getting louder as she spoke, and it didn’t take long for them to realize what was happening.
El and Dustin surrounded Steve, cuddling into his sides to comfort him. He needed it, and he was always willing to accept love from the kids. They so rarely gave it, not because they didn’t love him, but because they were at that age where they didn’t want to.
These kids were his in almost every way that mattered, and he was just grateful that they weren’t hesitating when he needed them most.
“You kids could have died. Steve should have never allowed most of this to happen. He’s the adult, and he let you all go into this without even considering you could die.”
“You think we were just gonna sit around and wait for the adults to handle it? When have we ever done that?” Dustin asked incredulously.
“It’s what you should have done. Steve knows that.”
“Mr. Harrington?” A different nurse was standing in the doorway now, older, definitely less nervous.
“Yes?” Steve responded, wiping his tears away quickly.
“Mr. Munson is in a recovery room. He’s woken up a few times for a minute and each time he’s asked for you. Are you family?”
He was pretty certain hospital policy meant only family could go back, especially during natural disasters, so he lied.
“Yes, he’s my cousin. I can’t reach anyone else yet.”
The nurse smiled, though she probably didn’t quite believe him.
“Right this way, then.”
Dustin tugged on his arm.
“Can I come with you?”
“Sorry,” Steve shook his head. “Not yet. Let me check on him, and I’ll come right back out for you.”
“See? This is what I meant about letting his feelings get in the way! What if we weren’t here? Would you just leave the kids to sit out here alone?”
This time, El spoke up.
“Steve is always putting us first. He can put himself first sometimes. That is allowed.”
Steve wanted to hug her again, but the nurse looked like she was going to walk away, and if he didn’t follow her, he wouldn’t see Eddie.
“Go see him, we’ll be here,” Lucas said from next to Erica.
He nodded at them all, giving them a smile before he followed the nurse without looking back at Hopper or Joyce.
Eddie was asleep when they entered the room, so the nurse whispered to him at the door.
“He’s on a lot of morphine, and he’s still receiving a blood transfusion. He may wake up off and on, but he probably won’t make much sense until they lower the dose. Just be here for him,” she smiled before leaving the room.
Steve turned to Eddie and couldn’t hold back more tears.
He’d let him down. He’d let all of them down.
He was supposed to be the hero, despite the jokes about it all, they all knew he was.
But not this time.
Eddie almost died. Max almost died.
He could feel the bat bite on his stomach burning and itching, like it was already getting infected, but he ignored it.
He could wait.
He sat down on the side of the bed, slowly so he wouldn’t wake Eddie up.
But Eddie’s eyes fluttered open once, then twice, then a third time before they managed to stay open enough to see Steve.
“Stevie?” His voice rasped out, a small smile hidden under his oxygen mask. “You’re here.”
“I’m here, Eds.”
He had to be strong, but his brain was so focused on everything he’d done wrong and if he’d just been faster or got out of the vines quicker, Eddie probably wouldn’t be here and Max would be awake and-
“Stop.”
“Hm? Stop what?”
“Bein’ mean.”
Steve’s brows furrowed. He hadn’t even said anything else, had he? Was he so exhausted that he was actually talking without realizing it now?
“I’m not even saying anything.”
Maybe it was Eddie hearing things. He knew morphine was pretty intense.
“To yourself.”
“What?”
“Bein’ mean to yourself. In your head.”
“I-”
“‘S okay. Me too sometimes. Just gotta stop.”
Steve couldn’t help but smile at the way Eddie’s eyes kept drooping closed as he spoke. He would probably fall back asleep any second.
“I’ll be nice. You get some sleep.”
“You rest?”
“Not yet. Maybe later.”
Steve couldn’t really rest until he knew everyone was home, safe, and sleeping off some of the worst of their injuries.
“Yes yet.”
Steve snorted. Eddie was so high. He knew it was better than whatever pain he would feel when they eased him off of everything, but hopefully he wouldn’t remember all this.
“Sleep,” Eddie said, his hand managing to find Steve’s and tugging weakly on it.
“I can’t sleep here, Eds. This is your bed.”
“Our bed.”
Steve’s cheeks were hot, he knew if he touched them, they’d feel like fire. Eddie just had that way of completely rendering Steve speechless. He’d done it so many times over the last couple of days, Steve lost count.
“I’ll stay right here until your uncle gets here, okay?”
“And after?”
It probably wasn’t smart. It would look weird for him to stay in general, but he also had to get the kids home, try to patch himself up at home, maybe shower before he did some rounds and made sure everyone was taken care of.
“I have to take care of the kids.”
“But they have parents.”
“Yeah, well.”
They were interrupted by a knock on the door.
Hopper walked in, face as serious as Steve had ever seen it.
“I was able to contact your uncle, Eddie. You can go now, Steve.”
But Eddie gripped his hand harder, frowning at Hopper. He seemed more awake all of a sudden, but with the way his eyes kept trying to close, Steve could see it was a challenge.
“I want him here.”
“Eds, it’s fine. He’s not too happy with me right now, so-”
“What? Why? You helped save the world.”
Eddie was looking between Steve and Hopper like an answer would suddenly make itself known, but Hopper was just staring at Eddie, and Steve was just staring at his feet.
He didn’t want to get Eddie involved in this. He just wanted to pretend it never happened, maybe try to look Hopper in the eye again someday, and apologize to Joyce for not keeping the kids as safe as he could have.
But Eddie apparently took the “no running” thing very seriously now.
“Steve? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Just. I kinda let them down, didn’t keep everyone safe.”
Steve shrugged it off, but he knew he wasn’t very convincing, or really even shrugging it off. He still felt the ache of disappointing people in his chest.
“Hold the fuck up. You’re serious?”
Eddie sounded as outraged as someone high on morphine could. His voice was barely distorted by the oxygen mask on his face, and his eyes were nearly at their normal size.
Steve couldn’t look at either of them.
“Steve is trusted by all these parents to keep their kids out of danger, and he brought them headfirst into it. It just made Joyce and I wonder how often they were doing stupid things,” Hopper explained, though he didn’t even sound convinced he believed his own words.
Joyce was walking in just as Eddie was about to speak.
“Steve, I think you should bring Dustin home. Claudia is going to get worried.”
He didn’t need to look up to know that Eddie was glaring at Joyce and Hopper.
“Let me get this straight. Steve provides free rides, and babysitting services, and meals, and fun for your kids damn near every day. He protects them during this shit every time it happens, literally puts his body on the line to keep them alive. Tried to somehow keep them as safe as possible when it seemed like the world was ending this time, did keep them alive, and you’re still finding reasons to blame him?”
They both had the decency to at least look like they regretted it.
But they still didn’t say anything.
“Fuck this. I’m not gonna pretend to know everything about your little Upside Down Club, but I’m in it now. None of us wanna be here, but we are. Steve’s been doing his best for years, since he was a kid, and all you can do is complain that your sweet angels aren’t completely unscathed? This is a team effort, you know that. They volunteered. Steve would have had to lock them in a prison cell for them not to help.”
Steve looked up at Eddie, watched as he started to lose the fire that had overtaken him temporarily, his eyes dulling as the morphine dripped into his veins and flushed through his system.
“Best damn babysitter…” Eddie mumbled as his eyes fell closed.
Steve watched him for a moment, waiting to see if he suddenly woke up again. When he didn’t, he stood up slowly, didn’t want to risk him feeling the bed move, and made his way to the door.
But something hurt in his chest, something he knew wouldn’t go away unless he said something.
He turned to see Hopper and Joyce staring at each other, having a silent conversation.
“I’m used to disappointing people. I’ve been disappointing my parents my whole life. Disappointed friends, Nancy, bosses. But I have never let those kids down. I do my best with them. I try to be there for them the way I wish someone had been there for me. I make sure they’re kids because life handed them a shitty card or whatever and they deserve to still be kids. You can be mad at me if you want, but I know I did my best. They know I did my best.”
He didn’t wait for a response, didn’t want to hear them say anything else about how wrong his decisions were.
But Joyce stopped him from leaving the room, hand on his arm.
“Steve, wait. Honey, I’m sorry. I think…I think we got caught up in the moment and just needed someone to blame.”
“You do the best you can. We know you do a lot for them.”
It was nice to hear, but he couldn’t get over the uncomfortable itch in the back of his head that he deserved more than that.
“Thanks, but I don’t think I can accept the apology right now.” And then the anger really set in. It came over him so fast, he could feel his hands shaking. “A lot of things are out of our control. We all wanna blame someone for this stuff, but it just boils down to the same people over and over. Max is in a coma because of Henry Creel, not me. Eddie is in the hospital because of demon bats, not me. Eleven and Will are connected to the Upside Down because of the government, not me. I’m just trying to be whatever they need, and that’s better than I can say for either of you at this point.”
Steve left this time, Joyce dropping her hand from his arm halfway through his loud speech.
Okay, he was yelling.
But Eddie slept through it, and it felt good to get all of that out.
He made his way to the waiting room, hoping everyone would still be there so he could check in.
Everything felt too fresh, too much like Vecna could show back up and take any of them at any moment.
But the waiting room was empty, not even Dustin remained.
Steve did his best not to panic. Their parents had all been contacted, so they most likely had just been picked up and brought home.
“They’ve all been picked up, sugar,” an older nurse said from the front desk.
“Oh. Thanks.”
“They left you a note, though.”
He recognized her as the woman who had been here the whole night, handling phone calls and people walking in like she’d been doing this for decades. Maybe she had been.
He walked over and grabbed it from her, giving her a small smile in thanks.
He walked outside before he opened it, not sure why he was suddenly nervous.
But as he read, he felt tears in his eyes for what felt like the hundredth time that night.
Steve-
Go home and sleep. We’ll be okay for a day while you rest. You don’t ever do that. We don’t agree with Joyce and Hopper, and we hope you know you’re the best damn babysitter ever.
Love,
Dustin, Lucas, Erica, El, Will, Mike, and Max (if she could)
He folded up the note, put it in his pocket, and walked to his car.
He ignored the blood in the backseat, rolled his windows down to ignore the stench of iron.
Knew he would be spending most of his day tomorrow trying to clean the stains out, but figured it would be a good mindless task.
He thought about Eddie, about how quick he was to defend him. About how he’d gripped his hand like it was a lifeline.
It felt that way to Steve.
He hadn’t let Eddie down. He’d saved Eddie.
If he didn’t do anything else right, he’d done that, and nothing Joyce or Hopper said could take that away.
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#joyce byers#jim hopper#ficlet#request#some angst but a positive ending#with some cute drugged up eddie#and some overprotective gremlins
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I always wondered what fics do my favorite authors read bc maybe if I start reading them too, I'll be able to write like them 😤 Kidding aside, can you recommend some Erwin x Reader fics that you really like/inspire you to write? I'm fine with on-going ones 🤩
little anon i could KISS you!! i've been looking for an excuse to make an erwin fic recs post so here we go *cracks knuckles* brace yourselves heheh (warning: most of these recs are 18+)
first of all: everything @riewritten has ever written. EVERYTHING. that goes without saying. her brain is so big. i wish i could take a trip inside her mind. rie ily
this is a story of the sea by shinzouing is a canonverse eruri x reader fic, where the three enter a relationship (or rather, erwin enters a relationship with both of them. levi and reader are idiots at first. the pining is so delicious though). where do i even begin to talk about this masterpiece? it broke me. it seriously broke me. i'm just going to say that the universe she has created in this story (as well as in the sequel which i'm going to talk about in a sec) feels so real and so right that when i finished it i needed a minute to remind myself what details that are ACTUALLY canon and what aren't. peak writing i swear. heartbreaking, but worth it.
after tiasots has broken your heart, go read beyond the sea by the same author and let it piece it back together!! it's currently being posted, and it's basically the continuation of tiasots BUT erwin survives at shiganshina (unlike in tiasots). again, same thing: peak writing, and a little universe it's sooo easy to get lost in. this story will end up living rent free in your mind, trust me.
aaand also set in the tiasots universe is certain obscure things!! it's three chapters, and in each of them they take turns between being dominant or submissive. this is smut that goes a lot harder than what you can find in tiasots but everything shinzouing writes is pure gold
to complete the eruri x reader category (aka the fics that made me go "i think i might be into the concept of throuples") there's two lovers by feelingthorny. it's also set in canonverse. erwin and levi are in an established relationship, one day they invite reader into their bed, and... Big Feelings ensue. i have another fic by feelingthorny by recommend, and oh man, she truly has a way of writing emotions that is so evocative and poetic, it truly drags you into the moment and you are able to feel exactly what they are feeling, they're so immersive. the smut parts literally drip with body worship, it's insane. beautiful.
the other fic by feelingthorny i HAVE to mention is close call. this one is pwp, but FUCK this erwin is SO DREAMY. and, as one might tell, the writing is just marvelous.
next, i recommend every! single! fic! that belongs to the to build a home series by nylondreams. the romance, the intimacy, the tenderness... ahh, they're so lovely to read. and *cough* the first fic in the series gave me a breeding kink *cough*
more recommendations in the "horny fics that also made me fall in love even more" category: e major, uncorked and treasured memories, all by whatsherquirk. delicious. that's all i'm going to say.
prying eyes by SecretsOfHarprocrates is in my opinion a depiction of erwin that's very close to how he'd behave in canon (if canon included sexy times)
four christmases by ghost_party was !!! ok i don't really know what to say about this one because it's been a while since i read it, but you have to trust me and check it out!!
i think that's all for now, i hope i haven't forgotten anything (if i have i'll just reblog this post and add more). happy reading <3
now PLEASE give me an excuse to make an eruri fic recs post (or even a levi one)
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Rewriting "At All Costs" (and making a new song)
Ah, my favorite song from the film! I decided to rewrite it anyway to work into my AU (as I did with "Knowing What I Know Now" and "I'm a Star"). If you've read my rewrite, you'll know that I also imagined a reprise of this later. In contrast to the mellow vibe of this, I'd want a more energetic, rumbling version of this song, given that it's sung between an the villains, a tortured Magnifico and power-hungry Amaya. Amaya at this point is rather displeased, as she has only JUST learned that Magnifico could bestow others with his almost limitless power, but never offered it to her, which is because a part of him, while loving her, knows how dangerous it'd be in her hands, and he'd never want to subject her to the burdens he carries anyway. Thematically, I'd probably say this was a mix of "Part of Your World" and the end of "Do You Wanna Build a Snowman?" Hope you enjoy this! And spoilers: I had two different ideas on how to make this song, so I made it twice! Hope you have the patience for two different songs in this post.
[Magnifico]
You just don't understand. I don't think about subjugation
But I know you do.
Mi reina, she knows how to ignore her past
All the power to you!
Anxiety has been a part of me
Since I was five
I ask you to see caution through my eyes.
[Magnifico]
You are the thunder that goes with my rain
You feel rage when I feel pain
With me, you're not a liar.
Amaya
[Magnifico]
Love me for my flaws
For I, I will protect you at all costs
Tell me all is calm.
That without me, you are lost
You are lost.
[Amaya]
Mi Rey, you always see through
My games, makes me respect you
But you know I can handle it, so come on pay me my dues!
I know your biggest fears
I won't let that come to fruition
Just trust me and love me for my ambition.
As you say, never can I lie
With you here in my face, you know I wouldn't try.
[Amaya]
So love me for my flaws
For I, I will protect you at all costs
Like the roses in the frost
Without me, you don't exist,
You are lost.
[Amaya and Magnifico]
And if I'm wrong, you can call me worthless and then
Go cast me aside
But if I'm right, don't you dare to question me again
As husband and wife
In this dark world, we'll become the boy and the girl
Who ruled over life
[Amaya & Magnifico]
But promise as one does
Let's not fight again, at all costs
Keep you safe here in my arms
I, I will protect you at all costs
At all costs
I hope you enjoyed this version! If not, I hope you enjoy the next idea. I call this "Love & Fear (Royal Frustration)" or perhaps just "Love & Fear."
[Magnifico]
My dear, I love you
I will never take that back
But take advantage
And I'll be on the attack
As a child, my heart was broken
Then I met you, and I found it could still beat
Not many words needed to be spoken Just like then, I'll make this short and sweet
[Magnifico]
You barking up the wrong tree
Stop test-test-testing me
I have my reasons
So just let-let-let it be I can't have closure You don't want exposure So obey the king If I mean anything!
[Magnifico]
To you, everything comes easy
The likeable princess, the wise and just queen
But me, I'll always be the outcast
They only adhere if I keep on this ring!
"The Dangerous Sorcerer," Ooh, it fits like a glove! Perhaps it'd be better to be feared rather than loved.
[Amaya: Spoken]
(Sigh) All that power, and you're still pathetic.
[Amaya]
Come here, let me coddle you
Just like when we met
Another poor refugee
I guess that's what I get.
You're codependent, you're insecure
You're all bite and no bark!
Are you a hero or a villain?
You can't even play one part!
[Amaya]
To you, everything should be easy
For me, it's been anything but.
Clawed my way up the tower for knowledge and power,
And it seems I even have more guts!
"The Dangerous Sorcerer," Ooh, is that who's here? We agree on one thing: don't embrace love; embrace fear!
[Amaya and Magnifico]
Don't crumble under the weight of expectation
Don't let them stomp you when you run the nation!
Wishes aren't made; they're given
Like a gift with the most exquisite ribbon.
And gifts don't come for free
When they come true 'cause of me!
[Amaya & KING MAGNIFICO]
So cower, my subjects
It's what I desire
Keep on wishing
It's what I require!
[Amaya]
And just remember, my doves.
[Magnifico]
It's better to be feared than loved.
And there you have it! Please let me know which version you prefer. This original song isn't my best work, I'm sure, but I tried!
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Silk & Cologne (20)
A Miguel O’Hara x OC series - link to AO3 (X)
Chapter 20 - Kiss - previous chapters (X)
Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x Female OC
Words: 4.4K+ words
Warnings: PG for classic Disney musical number and predator Miguel instincts
Summary: Lisa and Petra set off to rescue Miguel
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“Lisa, what happened?” Lyla’s virtual form fizzled before me as she searched the room frantically. “I lost Miguel’s signal, what’s going on?”
I pointed at the destroyed glass window and she turned, her jaw dropping. “Oh, shock,”
“You could say that again,” I groaned.
“Oh shock,” Lyla repeated, shaking her head before she turned back to face me.
“It gets worse,” I grimaced.
I picked up Miguel’s broken gizmo from the floor and showed it to her. Lyla’s hands reached up to her mouth as she gasped, zipping over to hover over my hand as she analyzed the damage. “Oh, no, oh this is really bad,”
“Can it be repaired?” Petra asked with concern.
“Unfortunately it’s beyond repair,” Lyla sighed before looking up at me. “I heard Miguel scream before I lost his signal. Lisa, what did this?”
“One of Petra’s maids turned into a bat demon,” I answered, lowering my head. “I didn’t see the initial transformation like Petra did, but she took his body and flew through the window and out into the outskirts of the kingdom,”
“It was horrible,” Petra shivered, “My spider-sense didn’t detect her treachery. She was my friend, and so was Miguel. . .”
“We’ll bring Miguel back, Petra, that is very much certain,” I stated with a firm nod, my fingers curling into a fist. “Lyla, this is an emergency situation. Can you call Jessica to come down and help us?”
“Um, about that. . .” Lyla seemed to hesitate, tapping her fingers together nervously.
“What’s wrong, Lyla?” I asked, a pit of worry growing in my stomach.
“I’ll still call her, but, unfortunately she can’t come on this mission,” Lyla sighed in disappointment.
She swerved to the side as Jessica’s caller ID appeared beside her. After a few rings, Jessica answered, her holographic image taking form. She appeared to be sitting down, her baby bump had grown a little since I had last seen her.
“Lisa, Petra, please tell me you have some good news,” Jessica panted, her forehead riddled with sweat.
“I’m afraid not, Lady Drew,” Petra shook her head in remorse.
“What’cha talking about?” Jessica raised a suspicious brow. “Where is Miguel?”
“That’s why Lyla called. Miguel was kidnapped and his Gizmo got busted,” I explained with a worried expression.
I could see the guilt and frustration build up in Jessica’s eyes as she smacked herself in the head. She cursed under her breath. “Oh, lord have mercy. . .”
“Jessica, easy,” Spider-Doc’s voice came through the speaker as he came to Jessica’s side. “Remember your deep breathing,”
“Doc, what’s wrong with Jessica?” I asked with worry.
“I’m afraid she’s not fit for duty at the moment. She’s experiencing minor Braxton-Hicks contractions,” He explained before crying out in pain.
Jessica had tightened her grip on his hand, appearing to be literally crushing it. “You call this minor?!”
“In medical terms, yes,” he gasped as she released him, shaking off the pain.
“I’d do anything to help you rescue the big guy, you two, but you heard the Doc. I’m unfortunately not going anywhere,” Jessica shook her head. “But I can send Gwen and Pav in my stead. I trust her to help handle things, and I’ll inform Margo whip up a new Gizmo for Miguel,”
“Thanks, Jessica, that’s more than enough,” I smiled in relief. “Hope you feel better soon,”
“Tell Lady Gwen and Sir Pav to meet us on the outskirts of the village,” Petra instructed politely. “I believe I may know where our friend is hiding Lord O’Hara,”
///////
Petra and I arrived at the outskirts of the village, overlooking another part of the forest. The part of it that wasn’t contaminated with mosh. Within moments, a portal opened up as Gwen and Pav emerged from the opposite end.
“We came as quickly as we could,” Gwen panted, appearing to have been running and out of breath.
“You’re right on time, Lady Gwen,” Petra reassured the Ghost-Spider with a soft smile. “Lady Lisa and I have just arrived. You must be Pav,”
“Your highness,” Pav offered Petra a curt smile as he bowed respectfully, his luscious hair dangling.
“Would we have time for pleasantries, I’d love to get properly acquainted, but time is of the essence,” Petra stated as she pointed inward through the forest. “Beyond some ways away through those trees lies a gorge, and within that gorge is a cave that was once home to a demon summoning cult,”
“You’re absolutely sure that’s where Isabella took Miguel?” I asked her for clarity.
She nodded firmly. “I’m very sure. I’ve dealt with monsters in that dwelling before, this will be no different,”
“Then let’s not waste any more time. We don’t know how long Miguel could have been glitching for,” Gwen responded with urgency.
“I just hope we can make it to save him in time,” Pav shared the same level of urgency, though his voice was laced with worry.
“You have the extra Gizmo?” I asked Gwen.
She reached back into her pocket, showing it off. Pav also reached into his back and handed me an extra music player. I gasped, my eyes widening as I silently thanked Pav for the surprise as I slipped it into my holister for safe keeping.
“Good. Hang on to it for me until I tell you to pass it along,” I instructed. “Isabella wants me and only me to go through her challenge. Let’s move out,”
The four of us activated our web shooters as we slinged and swung through the forest like trained acrobats in the late night sky, the full moon shining down on us. Pav swung near me, hovering at my side. I couldn’t help but notice he kept his knees up when he swung. It was actually kind of adorable.
“So how exactly did this happen?” He asked.
“Isabella turned into a bat demon, claiming that Spider-Freaks were invading their kingdom and knocked Miguel unconscious and placed a curse on him,” I explained.
“A curse?!” Pav gasped.
“Unless Lady Lisa can get past her stone golem and free Lord O’Hara from the curse, he will remain in slumber for eternity,” Petra quickly added.
“Or if the glitching of his atoms doesn’t kill him first,” Gwen grumbled in despair as she swung ahead of us.
“What kind of curse?” Pav asked. “How does Isabella expect Lisa to free Mr. O’Hara?”
My cheeks flushed, a ting of embarrassment showing on my face. My memories drifted back to our dinner, at Pav’s realization that I may be developing feelings for Miguel and his reassuring words of encouragement. Did I want to give him the satisfaction and confirm my true feelings on the matter?
“. . . An act of true love,” I answered.
Pav gasped loudly, his free hand cupping the side of his face. “You mean true love’s kiss?!”
“How did you guess that?” I gawked at the young boy. “An act could be a multitude of things!”
“But that’s the most effective,” I could hear the smirk on his face as he winked at me. “You like Mr. O’Hara! I knew it, I knew it!”
“Let’s focus on the mission, Pav,” Gwen yelled from her position. “Miguel’s life is literally in danger!”
“Right, right, you’re right, Gwen, the mission is important,” Pav collected himself, composing his emotions.
///////
We arrived at the gorge and quickly found the cave that Petra described. She wasn’t kidding about it previously being overrun by cultist demons. Strange drawings and glyphs written in paint littered the walls as we walked through the entrance of the cave. When we came to the other end, it was an open clearing with a large pit at the bottom that was shaped like an arena.
Passing the arena, my eyes quickly recognized Miguel’s form as his body had been placed on an old altar, left to slumber on his back.
“Miguel!” I cried out, my voice filled with relief now that I laid eyes on him.
The others and I began to race forward but stopped when a large black winged beast flew past us, the wind blowing harshly as we steeled ourselves. Isabella flew upwards, flipping her body so that she clung to a stone spike on the ceiling, her hair dangling in the air. “So you’ve come,”
“You thought we wouldn’t?” I raised a brow at the bat demon.
“Isabella, you can still stop this. Release Lord O’Hara and we can talk this out in a peaceful manner,” Petra stepped forward trying profusely to reach out to her friend that hopefully lingered still inside the beast.
“NO!” She roared. Pointing a clawed finger towards me. “The deal was for her to accept my challenge,”
I could feel my body shudder as stones and boulders within the pit began to shake and merge together, forming a big stone golem. The guardian of the cave Isabella had mentioned earlier. So that was the thing I had to get passed in order to get to Miguel?
“It’s okay, Petra,” I placed a hand on her shoulder. “I don’t think she’ll budge on an alternative,”
“Are you going to enchant it with your powers?” Gwen asked.
“Hopefully,” I sighed, loosening my shoulders as I warmed myself up.
“You can do this, Lady Lisa,” Petra offered me an encouraging nod. “Just sing from the heart,”
“Show that golem that love conquers all!” Pav cheered.
I handed Pav the spare music player that Byte made for me. He pressed the play button as the melody began to play. I bobbed my head, getting a feel of the music and the beat it made. “Here it goes,”
I took a deep breath, taking a moment to compose and steel myself for what was to come. I opened my eyes, firing a web sling as I vaulted myself into the pit below and faced the stone golem. Its red eyes glared at me as it raised a fist and swung towards me. Time to dance!
[Song: One Kiss by Sofia Carson from Descendants 3] (X)
“Don't freak out, it's okay
'Cause true love can save the day
And I think we feel the same
But I don't know~”
I jumped out of the way of the punch, firing a web to sling myself onto its hand as I began to run up its arm. I fired some web fluid into its orbs and it groaned in frustration, staggering back a step. My footsteps were loud against its rough terrain, able to feel where I was climbing as it swung for me with its other hand.
“When we met, it was sweet
He was oh so into me
Seems like things are meant to be
But I don't know~”
I front flipped out of the way, channeling some power into kicking it in the face. The golem fell back completely and collapsed to the ground. I saw my chance, jumping off its body as I began to run for the other side of the pit to reach Miguel, but then the ground shook violently at my feet as I stumbled.
“Does he love me? Or does he love me not?
Do I love him? And is it strong enough?~”
I turned around to see the golem slam its hands into the ground. Its body made a 180 U-turn with its body, standing itself back up right and faced me completely. I glanced between it and up at Miguel’s unconscious form on the altar.
“One kiss, one kiss
It all comes down to this
One kiss, one kiss
Ooh~”
I whined a hiss from my lips, quickly shooting another web fluid at its face before making a break towards the opposite end to the pit once more.
“One kiss, one kiss
This moment could be it
I, I, I wanna know
So here I go~”
I fired two web slings and yanked on the robe, propelling me forward as Pav, Petra, and Gwen watched on in anticipation. “Oh, oh, oh–!”
When it looked like I was going to make the jump, my spider-sense went off as I felt something tightly tug at my legs. I turned around to see the golem reach its hand out and grab me and tossed me back the opposite way, crashing into a boulder. Thank GOD for the enhanced Spidey-strength or I would be a dead Spider-Muse right now.
Oh GOD, I agreed on Hobie’s Spider name for me didn’t I?
“OH!” The trio winced at the hit.
“Keep it cool, keep it calm
Think he's loved me all along
But maybe I got it wrong
So I don't know~”
I pulled myself free from the rubble, desperately shaking off the hit. My eyes widened as the golem threw another boulder at me. I managed to roll and swerve my body away from the incoming projectile. I fired a web at his chest, vaulting me forward as I channeled my power and activated my webbed gloves, glowing their golden hue as I struck the golem.
“He's so good, got my back
But maybe I'm just too bad
Could we be a perfect match?
Now, I don't know~”
The golem stumbled back as I landed firmly on the ground. I dashed forward, going to try and bust his stone knee-caps and shins. He didn’t take kindly to that as he swung for me. I did my best to serve and duck around his swings.
“Does he love me? Or does he love me not?”
Finally he grew tired and decided to straight up squish me with his fist. I raised my arms above my head, crossing them as I channeled more power into my fists as the golden hue intensified. When the fist came down, I grunted, kneeling closer to the ground as I managed to stop him from completely squishing me as my leg muscles screamed for relief.
“Do I love him? And is it strong enough?
Ooh-ooh-ooh!~”
With a loud grunt I put everything I had into lifting my arms and shoving the golem’s fist away from my form. His stone ridged arm flew back and smacked himself in the face as it recoiled. Taking a few steps back, he composed itself and I began to stalk towards it.
“One kiss, one kiss
It all comes down to this
One kiss, one kiss
Ooh~”
I could hear Petra and the others cheering me on, offering words of encouragement. I cracked my knuckles, flexing and shaking off my fingers before I charged at the golem as it went in for another punch. I met it half way, firing a web to sling me forward to meet its momentum and channeled my golden punch one more and broke through its hand, tumbling into rubble.
“One kiss, one kiss
This moment could be it
I, I, I wanna know
So here I go~”
The golem fell forward, landing on its side as I walked past it. Isabella snarled, giving it a command but I paid it little mind. I gaze shifted towards Miguel’s sleeping form on the altar above us and I continued moving forward.
“Yeah, here I go~”
Rumbling caught my ear as my spider-sense kicked back up again. I turned back to see rocks flying towards me and I managed to duck down out of the way of the incoming fire. I stood up only to see the rocks flying back pounded into me, and carried me as the rocks around me formed back into the golem’s hand as I was now caught in its grasp.
“I feel my heartbeat beating saying, "It's gonna work"
But if I'm dream-dream-dreaming, this is gonna hurt,”
The golem hurled me around like I was a toy and it was a little toddler having the time of his life. He slammed his fist into the ground, knocking me around senselessly, dragging me across the wall. It was painful, not to mention aggravating. Every hit made me think back to all the times I was with Miguel. The good, not so good, and the ugly.
“Either I will or I won't
What if I do and he don't?
Is he my Romeo? Oh~”
When the golem pulled me out of the rubble, I could faintly see out of the corner of my eyes of Gwen, Petra, and Pav wanting to step in and help. But they held back, knowing it would break the deal I had made with Isabella. Even still, my gaze solely fell on Miguel’s form, and I felt my heart flutter. Something snapped in me, encouraging me to keep fighting.
Even if these feelings don’t fall through for us, Miguel was still my friend. He was still someone I cared for.
“There's only one, one way to really know~”
I managed to wiggled one of my hands free, slapping my hand onto its wrist. Web fluid leaked out as I sang a quick melody, enchanting it. Its orbs turned yellow as it released me. It stayed in its daze, allowing me to swing and zip through the air, creating dozens of webs around him and smacking them into its body.
Finally the golem released itself from my trance, its body getting stuck on my webs as I created a little platform for myself along the webs. Once the golem realized he had caught himself into my trap, a wicked grin curled on my lips as I crouched down, slamming the palms of my hands onto my platform.
“Heeeey!~”
All the interconnected webs of my trap glowed their golden hue and I raised my voice an extra octave, putting more power into my voice. It caused a chain reaction and there was a sudden explosion on the golem’s right side. When the smoke dispersed, it stumbled back and its right arm had shattered into tiny pebbles and dust.
“NO!” Isabella scowled.
“One kiss, one kiss
It all comes down to this
One kiss, one kiss
Ooh~”
One by one, small parts of the golem’s body began to explode. The more I sang, the more webs gave off the chain reaction around its body. Out of the corner of my eyes I saw Pav shaking Gwen by her shoulders, freaking out as Petra cheered me on. A sense of pride swells through me.
“One kiss, one kiss
This moment could be it
I, I, I wanna know
So here I go~”
I ran and glided across the webs, chasing after the golem’s crumbling body. When I was close enough, I jumped onto its chest, running up its body. I leapt up from its head as the last of its body exploded.
“Here I go
Here I go
Here I go!~”
I fired a web and swung out of the fighting pit and landed safely mere feet away from the altar. I jogged up the steps and inched closer to Miguel’s sleeping form. I looked him over, my hands hovering above him, hesitating to touch him. Until I saw him glitch in front of me. It was awful, due to the curse, he couldn’t scream from the pain, but the way his body morphed and shifted before resetting. . .
“Gwen!” I shouted, looking back at her.
Gwen ran ahead, using her webs to sling shot the brand new gizmo towards me as Pav and Petra chased after her. I caught the gizmo in my hand before putting it on Miguel’s wrist, securing it tightly. My eyes trailed his body frantically, taking deep steady breaths to try and keep myself calm.
“Lyla, is he okay?” I asked nervously.
Lyla’s AI form appeared before Miguel as she hovered over him. The screen on his gizmo lit up with vital signs and beeps repeatedly. Lyla wiped virtual sweat from her forehead, sighing in relief. “You did it, Lisa! His body is restabilizing from the glitching,”
“Thank GOD,” I exalted a heavy sigh of relief as I leaned my hands against the side of the altar.
Lyla stayed silent, making sure everything else was running smoothly on the new Gizmo to finetune them back to Miguel’s preferred specifications. My eyes trailed over his form, up to his face. A felt a shiver course through me, my fingers beginning to tremble.
“Everything checks out okay,” Lyla spoke up, drifting towards me. “All that’s left to do is wake him up,”
I took small steps along the altar, walking closer towards Miguel’s face. There were butterflies in my stomach as my heart pounded in my chest, beating so fast I thought it would burst out of my chest. I slowly began to reach a hand out towards him, but stopped, hesitating as I pulled back.
“What’s wrong, Lisa?” Lyla asked me.
“What if he wakes up, realizes how I freed him, and he thinks of me differently?” I looked over at the AI with worry.
“Like in a bad way?” Lyla tilted her head to the side.
I slowly nodded my head.
Lyla gave me a soft smile. “Lisa, trust me when I tell you, Miguel can come off as a bit closed off. But behind the scenes? He likes you, Lisa. A lot more than he’s willing to tell, even to me,”
“You really think so?” My eyes widened a bit at her proclamation.
“I’ve seen the way you look at him,” she grinned. “—and I’ve seen the way he looks at you,”
A blush formed on my cheeks. I glanced down towards Miguel’s face. To his lips.
“Tell you what; I’ll leave the call to you on how you want to explain this to him. You can be fully honest about your feelings or play it safe,” Lyla explained as she hovered down and patted my head. “Your secret is safe with me, girlie,”
“Thank you, Lyla,” I smiled.
Lyla fizzled away to give me some privacy. I managed a deep breath to compose myself, steadying my nerves. I reached my hand out, gently caressing Miguel’s face, my thumb brushing against his cheek.
“Please, please, let this work,” I uttered a small prayer.
Closing my eyes, I leaned and pressed a gentle kiss to Miguel’s lips.
It was a small, little peck, not meaning to overstay my advance, as this felt like a strange invasion of privacy even if it was saving him. But his puffed lips were soft, the complete opposite of his demeanor. I pulled back softly, watching him closely.
There was a gentle pulse of a magical aura coursing through him and then his arm shifted. A groan escaped him as he opened his eyes. He slowly sat up, lifting a hand to his head.
“Dios mío, mi cabeza. . .” He grumbled under his breath. - My god, my head.
My eyes widened at the sight as I took a step back in disbelief. I could hear Pav and the others cheering in the background, but I was so focused on Miguel that I had tuned them out. I was so happy and relieved that a small cry escaped me. I placed a hand over my heart, monitoring my heart beat as it pulsed quickly.
“You’re awake!”
“Lisa?” Miguel mumbles as his eyes adjust to his new surroundings. His gaze fixed on me and his eyes went wide. “Lisa!”
He tried to move and stand from the altar, but he growled, instantly reaching for his side. The growl sounded like something from a feral animal as he hissed from the pain. I came to his side, carefully placing a hand on his shoulder.
“Go slow, Lyla said you had been glitching for a minute there while you were under,” I explained, slowly helping him stand to his feet.
“What happened? I remembered the meeting in the lounge back at the castle. There was this light and then–,” Miguel hissed as he shook his head, the memory alluding him. “- nothing,”
“Isabella, Petra’s maid, was a demon in disguise. She put a curse on you and brought you here,” I recalled the events as I glanced down to see the bad demon at the bottom of the pit, weeping over her crumbled golem.
“What kind of curse?” He asked, looking down into my eyes.
I could feel my cheeks warming up at the question. I thought back to what Lyla said, the butterflies in my stomach returning as my fingers fiddled nervously along his shoulder. “Well–”
“YOU WENCH!” Isabella suddenly screamed.
Her form jumped from the pit and she shook the ground at our feet as she landed before us. I immediately stepped in front of Miguel, raising my arms in a protective manner. “I completed your challenge. The bargain was made,”
“No, my bargain was for you to get past my golem, not destroy it!” She roared.
“It didn’t exactly let me go easy,” I grumbled, narrowing my eyes at the demon.
“You don’t deserve it, no one deserves true love!” She screamed.
She reached into her back, pulling out a large sword and rose it in the air in a threatening manner. I gasped loudly, eyes wide as my legs suddenly froze, not wanting to move as she swung the sword down towards me.
“Miguel, RUN–!” I screamed until I saw a tall figure move by me.
It happened in slow motion. I watched as Miguel stood in front of me, raising his hands as he summoned his talons and caught the blade of the sword in his hands. My knees buckled at the impact, listening to him growl under his breath as the pupils of his eyes turned from his soft brown to feral red. With a heavy snarl, I watched as his talons sliced through the metal of the blade, tearing it to shreds.
The metal pieces cluttered to the floor, Miguel’s chest rising and falling as he bereaved heavily, starring Isabella down like a predator intimidating his prey. Isabella let out a cry, and before she could make another move, webs shot out from behind her as Gwen, Petra, and Pav yanked her away from the two of us.
Isabella struggled in the webbing as Miguel began to stalk towards her. He stared down at her with cold, menacing eyes. “Anyone who dares lay a hand on my Lady, will answer to me,”
My heart skipped a beat, my blush darkening.
Miguel rose his head, seeing Petra’s smile as he shot her a wink. He turned back to return to my side as Petra and the others webbed the demon in a cocoon.
“Now we’re even,” he grinned.
“Yeah, I suppose so,” I nodded slowly, the blush still evident on my face.
He offered me his hand, “Shall we return home, Lady Lisa?”
I smiled at him as I took his hand in mine, squeezing it tightly. “Yes, Lord O’Hara,”
///////
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How can you come up with your own OC? Help me with this please
For me, I start by taking things I like in people aesthetically and physically and then combine them in a way I find pleasing.
Lets use Arette and Fyra for examples.
I like redheads with freckles. I like braided hair. I like corsets and dresses that show shoulders. I combined these to make Arette.
Then we have Fyra!
I love grecian noses, olive skin, chocolate hair. You can see I brought the braided hair back too.
Once I am satisfied with the design, I then figure out how I want them to act. Most of my OCs these days are made SPECIFICALLY to ship with certain characters, so i make personalities that play off and contrast some what to the other.
Arette is kind, she has a moral compass, and is very protective of her adoptive daughter. But her fatal flaw is that she ignores red flags for the sake of her own comfort, this can cause her to bend her compass if given enough reason to over look things. This also ultimately puts her daughter in danger. This makes it easy for Bondrewd to tell her little white lies, and for her to ignore the red flags she does see. All until its too late and he's enacted his master plan. She turns on him, and deals with the massive guilt her own inaction caused.
Fyra is gentle and kind almost to a fault. She is naive to manipulation, but not to evil itself. She has a very strong moral compass and she sticks to it. Gideon can get away with SOME horrible things purely by lies and garnering sympathy. But he can not keep getting away with everything he does, and must adapt as Fyra can't be disposed of. Not only because she's growing powerful, but because he is growing fond of her. His jaded view of the world is slowly broken down by Fyra's kindness and love of anything and everything, broken or not. This ultimately leads to a not so tragic end for him as she changes him for the better.
After that is the part I find the hardest, which is creating a backstory and origin. Rule of thumb however is, that ones environment molds them as a person. Fyra's gentle nature is caused by the valley she grew up in, which was very peaceful. Everythig else I add to her (deceased mother, love of cooking dance and music) are all things I add for more flavor that fit a personality like she has.
Arette is a delver from Orth. She already grew up idolizing White Whistles, so its easy for her to be made to trust Bondrewd by him spinning similar tales that got all his men working for him. Her growing up there also means she can just write off Bondrewd's behavior as just him being a white whistle, as they all are a bit crazy. Her mother's dislike of delvers and the abyss pushes Arette into Bondrewd's arms when they first meet, cementing her place in his mind so when they meet again, he simply HAS to keep her with him.
So yeah. I hope this all helps you, and give you an idea what to do. Just start by making what you think looks cool, and then build off that to create a story. =)
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I shouldn't stay up so late anymore while sober, because then I start missing people I had to leave for safety reasons. Or people who just... stopped texting one day even though we were friends for years, and started dodging my messages and calls. Or people who were part of my life for a season, but we've now lost touch.
And they're not coming back, and some of them wouldn't or shouldn't, but I notice their absence all the same. I don't like being alone. I fucking hate it. But I keep getting hurt every time I trust someone, and that's a shitty lesson to learn.
So I'm trying to... listen to myself. And stay safe. And build strong friendships based on mutual trust, and not one person giving more than the other. I'm trying to not use more energy than I physically, mentally, or emotionally have to give, like I used to.
But I'm also trying to be kind, and open, and honest. It is not always easy. I do not always succeed. I mean, anyone who says they have their life entirely figured out before turning 30 is full of shit, because life changes (fortunately or unfortunately, depending on who you are and where you're at).
If I could ask one thing of the universe, it'd be to just. Find someone who Gets It. And they don't just think they do, they actually do. That's such a tall order because no human is perfect, and it's not realistic to only accept someone who comes my way who has no room to grow. I'd be a fucking hypocrite. I'd be an asshole.
Being in a loving relationship isn't supposed to be this hard, right? I shouldn't expect to be ridiculed or forgotten or disbelieved, right? Just because I have friendship, romantic, and sexual trauma doesn't mean my neural pathways are just too fucked up to be loved or find love, right? I'm not... broken?
There's a song by Tom Odell, "Another Love", that I've covered and sung at cabarets and alone to echoes against the wall for years. The speaker laments that he wants to love, cry, laugh, fight, feel anything in this new relationship of his, with this person who is so precious to him, and he just... can't. He used up everything in his prior relationships, he got burnt out, his time was wasted, whatever.
For the writer of the song, his purpose was to speak to a girl that he wants to be with but can't because he's currently in a relationship. However, he's acknowledged that many listeners interpret it as talking about a past relationship, and that's the meaning it holds for me. That's what it means to me when I sing it.
I don't want to miss Someone because I was burnt out by people who did not care. Because I was so focused on making everyone but myself happy that I didn't have the energy to engage. And so I try to do everything I can to fix things, and I've even gone back to those who left, and been hurt again. Sometimes I fuck up at trying to fix things despite my (and occasionally, their) best efforts because we just aren't compatible, or our trauma overlaps, or whatever it is this time.
It is so terrifying to put yourself out there only to get hurt... But I also know that I fear being alone more than I fear getting hurt. I'm not done growing or learning. I will fuck up again. Hell, I'm an adult who's barely started the correct puberty. I can barely take care of my cat, let alone myself.
But I can't stop hoping that I'll find Someone. Or Someones. I have far too much love to give for that. A fucking hopeless grayromantic.
Maybe someday, I'll get there.
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little writing event so i can get back into the swing of things! length will be determined by how motivated i am by the specific prompts. no set end date, but it won’t stay open forever.
pick 2+ characters for me to choose from (i’ll only pick/write for one).
— feel free to request anyone from genshin or hsr, but i’m less likely to prioritize genshin and it’s more just if it catches my eye.
lyrics! pick 1-3. i’ll include them all. all by the crane wives, a couple by emilee petersmark alone.
1. don’t buy me flowers (it pains me to watch the pretty little things wilt away)
2. i tried to do the best i could, but try as i might, i couldn’t bring myself to hold you
3. years of imitating mastery only made me a better thief
4. there is love that doesn’t have a place to rest, but it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders
5. i cut my teeth on second hand sentiment (you can’t trust a single thing i say)
6. on some level i think i always understood that these hands of mine were clumsy, not clever
7. tie me up by my callow belief someday i’ll make something out of me
8. it’s a secret i keep tucked inside my chest, with this heart of mine that’s guilty, not remorseful
9. i have hands that shake when there are cuts to make
10. there are times i still wonder about you
11. it was a march we made towards ruin and despair, but we held hands all the while
12. you’ll never see the reasons i had for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you
13. when i’m gone and you have naught, when you’re hollowed out and empty
14. i have gasoline in my veins; i am always burning, burning, burning
15. i am selfish, i am broken, i am cruel — i am all the things they might’ve said to you
16. we didn’t give up, we wouldn’t dare surrender — it was an honest loss
17. for as winsome as you may be, all you’re doing now is losing me
18. you are someone i have loved, but never known
19. i am a falling axe; i am a sharpened knife; i am a poison asp; i am a risk to your life, my love
20. you’re the culprit, so don’t blame me
21. so kiss me quick, steal every secret i keep (you can have anything that you want from me)
22. can it be easy for once? ‘cause i’m no good at being kind to myself (or anyone)
23. desire, desire ‘til there’s nothing left of me
24. and as for time, i am powerless to stop it
25. i am the beast at your back (you better run for your life)
26. so let my hope grow cold and atrophy, ‘cause there is no more room in your heart for me
27. how long have i been here all alone?
28. you kissed my mouth, you pushed me out, and now i’m struggling to free myself
29. i am not brave, i keep my focus on what is safe
30. with no more roots to tie me down, it’s just a different kind of lonely
31. do you ever feel nothing at all? i do (i would not wish that on you)
32. build yourself a citadel amid the foothills of regret
33. ain’t it a shame with time our dreams turned into jokes? i won’t let that be us
34. i learned to lie, i learned to grow, i learned to hold it for awhile and let it go
35. don’t just watch me go, you fool, run with me, keep up
36. those of us who vow never to love again are making liars out of honest men
37. i saw your eyes, so sweet, go cold
38. the only peace i have ever known is the peace i made with you
39. how long is forever?
40. i learned to take, i learned to keep, please tell me someday i’ll at least be able to sleep
41. i can take for better, but for worse i can’t condone
42. i won’t move but i can’t stay here, so what the hell am i supposed to do?
43. it’s not you i’m leaving, are you listening?
44. i’ve grown a mouth so sharp and cruel, it’s all that i can give to you, my dear — and when you come in quick to steal a kiss, my teeth will only cut your lips, my dear
45. i want to kindle a love that doesn’t age, even when all the years carve lines into your face; tell me i will be surprised, when i think i’ve memorized every touch and every thought, i want you to prove me wrong
46. red sky morning, lover’s warning; oh i know that the promise you wear, well, it ain’t for me
47. only my lover, not i, can keep my soul
48. i will only break your pretty things — i will only wring you dry of everything (but if you’re fine with that, you can be mine like that)
49. you could still carry me away, but you’d leave me here to die
50. bring it down on my head if these sins are mine; call it down on my head, for these sins are mine
51. far too soon for this, but i am all in, no matter how it ends
52. i am lost, i am wandering, love, through the withering greens, while you’re busy in love with the colors you see — and i dream of dying trees while you see yellow leaves
53. swallow the poison, i don’t want to spit bitter medicine — i think it’s making me sick
54. break my bones, turn me inside out again (‘cause i can’t hold on to what i’ll be in the end)
55. nothing could’ve been done, is that right? ‘cause i was born with a hole in my heart — we were fucked from the start
56. i think i might learn to linger, but not now
57. i am not afraid to give you everything
58. when azaleas bloom, he said, when the flower blossoms spread — that’s the day, that’s the day, that’s the day i’ll love you
59. bleeding together, the nights seem to stretch on forever
60. the moon will sing a song for me, i loved you like the sun; bore the shadows that you made with no light of my own
61. swallowing your doubt, like swords to the pit of my belly — i wanna feel the fire that you kept from me
62. i shine only with the light you gave me (i could’ve been anyone, anyone)
63. the words i speak are wildfires and weeds, they spread like some awful damn disease; and i swear i didn’t mean what i said, i swear, i didn’t mean it
64. now listen close, you owe me ears for dropping eaves; forget it all, you caught me in a moment weak
65. are we allies or enemies? this will be the death of me
66. remember when i could tell you not to smile when you were mad, and you would always crack? and we’d both be laughing in the end — now you’re not so quick to forget
67. all is fair in love and war, but i can’t fight with you anymore
might add more later. also, if you know the crane wives, feel free to send a lyric that isn’t listed here! these are just some i took from shuffling on spotify. they have way more music and it’s all worth a listen!
current favs are acheron, aventurine, blade, dan heng, and sunday, but i’ll do all the hsr ones i get!
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Love Lockdown | 01
𝐢. 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠
↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; no longer hiding in your apartment, it's either your beginning or definitive end
⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: yoongi x reader
⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: zombie apocalypse au, enemies to lovers, angst, fluff, eventual smut, horror au (?)
⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language
⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.7k+
𝐚/𝐧: huge thanks to @dee-ehn for creating this masterpiece! I knew I wanted her to make the banner for love lockdown because I trust her the most & her work is absolutely stunning! dee, thank you again x
𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢
Windows completely shattered, the building and grocery store that once looked and used to be one of the better ones now looks as if a big group of vandals have vandalized the entire place. The shelves are almost empty, minus the items that have been destroyed by rushing, desperate and eager citizens. With the glass everywhere, different kinds of liquid and sauce makes the whole store stench and even more disgusting for the nose, rather than a pair of eyes.
It's dark, too dark to try and avoid any necessary sound the shattered glass makes under your boots. Cringing at the sound, you continue your path down the aisle in desperate need to find something to eat. Anything that could drive away the hunger that caused you to come out of your hidings to the cruel and dark world.
It's been around four months since the hell broke down.
It started with a supposed virus all around the world. People were asked to wear face masks to prevent the virus from spreading, and follow the hygienic instructions the government ordered. With a little knowledge, everything got closed for a certain time – it's just for a certain time, they said. From stores to cinemas, schools and workplaces. It never came back.
They never opened any of these again.
The last true information people got was that the virus got mutated. Each day scientists, doctors promised they were working on it and were doing their best to figure out what was wrong. And maybe they weren't lying, they really tried but never succeeded.
Not until the real hell broke down and people started turning into something that was uncontrollable, spreading like disease that slowly but surely killed people and turned them into monsters. Most people wouldn't believe it, if it weren't for the live television where everyone could see. People surrounded a human that came out of nowhere, walking slowly as if its two legs were broken until it came to the camera, letting out the most disgusting and horrific sound before it bit the journalist right in front of the camera while millions of people were watching.
It cruelly bit off the flesh of the man's hand, the camera man screaming before the camera fell down and that's the last thing people saw before the world erupted into panic.
The disease, as scientists called it, spread fast and relentlessly. Humans turned into zombies in some might say short process, going after everything that breathed.
Zombies.
If someone said there will come a time when all those movies will turn into reality, disguised behind the terms of sickness and disease, most people would laugh.
All those people that tried to run away as fast as they could, in a hopeful promise there is a place where the disease and apocalypse didn't hit.
Is there a place like that?
Nobody knows.
There is no news, no contact with other people. There is barely any electricity as the whole world got swallowed into the darkness.
How did you end up all alone with no one to help you?
Easy.
The government sent all people into a hard lockdown, not allowing anyone to get out of their homes until completely necessary, which happened to be an emergency that required medical attention. The food and everything people needed got delivered straight to their doorsteps.
Living alone never felt more lonely.
How wrong you were.
Living in the world alone, where the undeads lurk behind every corner to bite off the flesh of anything that lives feels ten times worse.
Undeads – the name they have gotten and was last referenced in the television before no more news ever made it out.
An uncompromising whine wants to rip out of your mouth when the shelves of canned food are completely empty, no sign of anything small you can at least take a bite off. This is your end… maybe you won't die being bitten and turned into the blooded and rotten undead. You will die of hunger.
Still, hope dies last and you don't want to give up unless you find at least something. Not when you've risked everything to get here.
The flashlight in your hand that is slowly dying and shows barely any light isn't making it any easier for you to find something, maybe some hidden gems, but at least it's something.
The sheer light exposes even more spilled liquid, both the sight and stench of it making you almost gag as you crouch down, not wanting to get your clothes dirty – especially when you don't have any spare ones. You had to leave everything behind. The building you lived in is swarmed by undeads. It's a miracle you made it out alive. Without killing or harming anyone.
But your grumbling empty stomach protests and you crouch down even more, your knees almost hitting the dirty floor when you see a single can of peas, rolled out at the very back of the last shelf. Somebody had to miss it.
You want to let out a cry of happiness, ignoring the way your nose scrunches in disgust when you realize the can is covered in an unfamiliar liquid and you will have to reach for it and touch it with your bare hand – that is until you still want to eat.
You know you will have to get used to this. This new style of living because you no longer can go back to your small apartment, there is no food and electricity. You will never be able to come back when your neighbors are undead and if anyone there managed to survive, they are no longer there.
Fuck it, you think as you reach for it, swallowing a gag as you take the can. Holding it with your two fingers, a disgusted grimace present on your face, you point your battery further down the aisle as you try to find at least something to wipe your hands off.
Just like you thought so, even the aisle of toiletries is empty and even if there is something that was left behind, it's completely damaged and ripped. Finding a cloth that has dried blood on it, you take it and wipe your hands with it along with the can.
That's something you still need to get used to. The sight of blood everywhere.
Tossing the cloth away, you ignore the way the can stenches from the previous spilled liquid over it. You need to eat at least some of it. The canned peas are in water which could at least quench some of the thirst you will feel once you finally eat something.
Just as you're about to open the can, a sound of someone entering the store and the glass crushing under their boots makes you stop. Heart dropping down your stomach, you quickly hide behind one of the ending shells, heart thumping in your chest.
The footsteps and the constant glass crunching makes you realize there are several footsteps. It has to be a group of people.
Some may be happy, the knowledge of not being alone sparking hope inside them. But even humans that are alive and managed to survive so far have turned into monsters.
They are greedy, willing to fight and some even kill over the smallest things. On your way here you stumbled upon two men, fighting over something in the middle of the street until their fists were blooded. You hid behind the corner, praying they wouldn't see you even if you didn't have anything with you they could take.
People are ruthless.
You waited around twenty minutes until the sound of their fists stopped. When you peeked from the corner that managed to be your hiding spot, no one was there. That's until you noticed one of the men lying on the ground, blooded and not moving.
Should you go there and check if he lives? Should you get over your fear and help him?
The questions were answered before you could even think them through because a growling and deadly sound caused you to freeze. The man was too far away for you to be able to make it to him and even if you did, you are not strong enough to pull him up. Adrenaline and fear racing inside of you, you watched right in front of your eyes as the undead made its way to him and bit off his flesh.
The man wasn't moving. He never responded.
He was dead and the man fighting with him ruthlessly killed him.
You can't trust anyone. Not when the world is in the middle of an apocalypse and people are willing to fight over anything. There is no way people wouldn't kill you for the stupid can of peas.
There are distant voices you can't make out that slowly inch closer to you with each minute and you know it's just a matter of time before one of them notices you.
“This place is a fucking mess,” A man voice says, someone snickering nearby them. “I told you this will be an empty shot.”
“Shut up Johnny,” A feminine voice scolds the man, “You never know, that's why we come to these places.”
He grumbles something back, too low and quiet for you to understand.
Looking down at your hands, the battery is already dead and you're hidden in a complete darkness. Slowly walking around the aisle, you stay crouched down.
Maybe you will be able to make it out alive. Once they will be further down the store, you will silently leave without them noticing. It's still worth a try, you think.
Still hearing their footsteps and occasional grunts of disgust, you are careful about making any sounds as you round the corner, looking behind you where the voices get nearer and nearer. Too focused on pinpointing where they are (on the other side of the aisle where you are hiding) you are completely oblivious to another presence near you, too near, until you bump your back into their chest.
A yelp leaves your mouth, so loud that even the others shut their mouths. Turning around, you see a man standing behind you and you immediately stumble back, boots slipping on whatever that's on the floor as you land on your butt. The humiliation or disgust are long forgotten when you try to get away from the man who keeps walking towards you.
“Ah, hello,” he lets out, amusingly staring at your face full of fear as you clunch the canned peas to your chest.
He turns on his flashlight, aiming its light to your face which immediately makes you squint your eyes as you try to block it with your hand.
The rush of other footsteps are heard and you know you're bused. This is it.
“Looks like we have company.” The man chuckles, the sound causing you to shiver as you can think of nothing but danger.
It's the fact he clearly sees you scared, trying to get away from him no matter how much the metal of the aisle is digging into your back, and does nothing to assure you he is not going to hurt you.
“Get away from her, idiot. Don't you see she's scared?” A feminine voice scolds him. It has to be the one you heard when you were hiding. Oh, how gladly you would turn back time.
You turn towards her voice, seeing her standing a few meters away from you and the guy, flashlight aimed somewhere behind the two of you so she doesn't directly aim it at your or his eyes. You notice there is someone else standing beside her and from the looks of it, it looks like it's another man but you can't really make out any specific features.
There's no time to look at them thoroughly, especially when the man leans down to you and his flashlight points at the item in your hands.
“Looks like we found something after all,” And just as he says it, his hand is about to take it away from you but you don't let him, clutching it to your chest as you try to turn your body away from him.
His grin drops and a frown makes it into his face, you see it thanks to his flashlight illuminating the space around you two.
“We are not gonna hurt you,” he finally says, but still sounds annoyed at your stubbornness and unwillingness to hand him the food you've found. “Just give us the food.”
“No,” you manage to croak out, “I found it.”
“Oh, she speaks.” he calls out amusingly, but no one actually laughs and his presence causes goosebumps to appear on your skin.
“Just leave it to her.” The woman tells him, equally annoyed at him as he clicks his tongue.
He doesn't listen to her though, growling annoyingly as he leans down again, this time his hand making contact with you which makes you whimper as you start to wiggle on your spot again.
“What the fuck is this commotion about?” Someone's rough and loud voice booms out, no doubt it's another man, as another set of footsteps nears you and a new person joins the woman and man as he stands next to them.
“Johnny is being an idiot again.” The woman says right away, the guy next to you scoffing loudly immediately.
“You guys are stupid. There's no food in here and she has it,” Johnny, the man not leaving you alone and causing the hair on your body to stand, snickers. “Yoongi, we came here for food. There's nothing!”
“That doesn't give you the right to take it from her!” The other man scolds, the one standing next to the woman who's been quiet so far until now.
“You idiot, it's just a matter of time before we will run out of our supplies! Why the fuck do you think we went to look for food the third time in the row?” Johnny angrily spits as both of them scoff.
Yoongi, who only said one sentence so far starts to take long steps towards and for some reason, you grow even more intimidated because so far Johnny seems to wait for his next move rather patiently. Even with the lack of lightning you notice the dominance he holds, the whole group growing silent immediately as he moves.
His boots stop next to you, flashlight pointing at the item in your hands as you clutch it in your hands, hiding it from his eyes as he lets out a bitter chuckle. You think it's aimed at you, but then he looks up.
“You are seriously fighting over a fucking can of peas?”
The woman and man a few meters away from you start to stifle a laugh, Johnny stuttering over his words.
“It's something!” he points out as Yoongi shakes his head.
His flashlight illuminates the whole space even more and you take that time to fully look at his face. The first thing you notice are his cat shaped eyes, sharp and holding depth and strength as he glares at Johnny, looking rather annoyed at the man and his antics.
But then he glances at you and your eyes meet, and you immediately shrink under his cold gaze.
“Leave it to her.” he simply says, a groan of disapproval resounding from Johnny right away.
“Yoongi–”
“Look at her. She looks like she has been barely eating. We will keep looking,”
In other times you would grow offended by how sarcastically he says those words aimed at you, looking at you with so much coldness that makes you want to cuddle into your thin jacket.
Before anyone can say something else, the dark-haired man turns around and starts searching for supplies again, totally ignoring you or anyone else.
“Let's get back to work. It's already dark enough.” he says sternly, Johnny giving you one last glare as he turns around and walks away from you, finally leaving you alone.
Releasing a breath that you seemed to be holding, you shakily stand up back on your feet but that's until someone walks to you again and you rush to get away from them, feet stumbling once again.
“No, don't be afraid,” The man says in a soft and worried voice, “I'm not gonna hurt you,”
You stop, staring at him wide eyed as he comes closer, setting his flashlight down on the shelf as you can make out his soft features.
“I'm sorry about him. He's an idiot,” he says, chuckling a little but your features remain frozen as you can't bring yourself to laugh at his obvious jab at the guy named Johnny. “Are you okay?”
You hesitate, giving him a soft nod.
Sighing, he takes off his backpack as he starts rummaging through it. Doing that for a moment, he suddenly stops as he pulls out a small bottle of water handing it to you. You stare at him, still not moving an inch as he moves his head towards the bottle.
“Take it, please.”
You do, hesitantly but then you snatch it from his hands that makes him smile amusingly.
“Thanks.” you murmur, clutching the bottle to your chest as well.
He nods, eyeing you for a little bit. “Are you alone?”
Well, duh. Does he see someone else here?
Maybe that's why he is asking. He wants to make sure there is no one that could hurt them. You obviously can't.
“It's okay, you can tell me. I'm not gonna hurt anyone.” he assures you, despite his deep voice, it's somehow sweet and caring which makes you relax slightly but you still don't let your guard down, being aware of your surroundings and them.
“Yes.”
You watch the man's eyes widening before he gives you a pitiful look. He opens his mouth, ready to say something before the previous cold and deep voice cuts him off.
“What the fuck are you doing, Taehyung?”
You turn around, seeing Yoongi and the woman making their way to you both as he visibly frowns at the guy – Taehyung – in front of you. He eyes the bottle in your hands, immediately giving a glare to him.
“She is alone here, Yoongi,” Taehyung starts, not hiding worry in his voice. “We can't just leave her here.”
“You are alone?” The woman asks, letting her presence known as a concern can be heard in her voice and she joins you and Taehyung.
You notice her staring at you, giving you unconditional attention while you squirm under her eyes. She looks pretty, she hovers over you slightly but still lets enough space between you two not to make you extremely uncomfortable.
Shocked at the sudden attention, you give her a hesitant nod as she turns her head to Yoongi.
“Yoongi…”
“No, Zoya,” he says immediately and firmly, shaking his head. “We don't have enough food for anyone else. We are not here rescuing people.”
After a long time being in the presence of people, you comically start to feel more safe of not being alone but you're still aware of them. You're not fearing them as much, now that they seem like they really don't want to hurt you.
The sudden hope of not being alone makes your heart pick up its pace, although you're not sure if joining a group of people you don't know it's the greatest idea. Still – is it worse than staying alone knowing you have nothing to defend yourself with? You have nothing.
“She has nothing with her. She will be dead by the end of the night.”
Her words make you wince, knowing she's probably more than right.
“We can't save everyone, Zoya.” Yoongi tells her firmly again, Zoya clicking her tongue annoyingly at him.
“You don't have anything with you?” Taehyung asks, gaining your attention as you shake your head. “What's your name?”
You hesitate, staring at all of them as Zoya softens her features. “It's okay. We won't hurt you.” she reminds you, although she doesn't know Taehyung told you the same thing.
“Y/N,” you answer, voice shaky and fragile as Taehyung deepens his pitiful gaze full of empathy and worry. Zoya looks just the same, giving you a slight smile which you don't return, too scared to let your guard down.
“Do you have something to at least defend yourself with?” Taehyung asks gently, brows rising in concern when you slowly shake your head.
“I–I packed something,” you start, Taehyung nodding his head encouragingly at you. “But as I was leaving my building there was one undead, it attacked me and I lost my backpack.”
“Are you bitten?” Zoya asks warily immediately, suddenly looking on guard.
“No,” you answer, “No, I am not.”
Before it could, you let it drag down your backpack as you hurriedly made it outside. You lost all your spare clothes and some of the snacks in it. You have nothing.
“You didn't kill it? Didn't you have anything with you?” Taehyung asks, trying to understand your situation.
“I had a knife.” you answer.
“Why didn't you use it then?” Yoongi asks, sharp eyes glaring at you even from the distance between you and his friends.
“I dropped it when it almost jumped at me from around the corner.”
“You didn't kill it?” Taehyung asks again, brows pinched together.
“I-I got scared. I ran.”
That makes Yoongi scoff as he shakes his head, staring down at his boots almost amusingly as Taehyung frowns.
“How are you even alive?” he asks and you know it's just a bitter metaphorical question he doesn't expect an answer for.
You frown, growing embarrassed how mockingly he treats you. You're not a fighter, you never were. You locked yourself until you were forced to get out. You knew you wouldn't be able to make it out by yourself. You still know that.
“Yoongi, we can't just leave her here. She has nothing.” Zoya tries again but he only says her name through clenched teeth.
She keeps her mouth shut though, both her and Taehyung giving Yoongi a disapproving frown.
He doesn't seem to care, walking towards you while he pulls out something from a pocket of his cargo pants. He tosses it on the floor, the object landing next to your boots as he raises his brow at you. A knife.
“This will have to do,” he tells you. “Next time you meet undead, use it.”
There is a low chance of that happening – you using the knife and killing something – you think.
“You can't be serious, Yoongi!” Taehyung exclaims, not hiding his distaste as Yoongi just gives him an unbothered look.
“Guys, there is a backroom here!” Johnny calls out to the group, Yoongi's attention already elsewhere as everyone turns their head to Johnny. “But it's locked.”
“It's probably a supply room.” Zoya says in thought, Yoongi already nodding as he starts walking towards Johnny who stands in front of a dark blue metal door.
“Can you open it?” Yoongi asks, Johnny shrugging as he opens his backpack and starts looking for something.
He pulls out something metal – a gun, you realize – and you immediately start to back away, your eyes widening as a fear crosses your entire body. Taehyung and Zoya notice it, Zoya gently catches you by your forearms as you try to pry her hands off you.
“Hey, no, don't be scared. It's just for safety measures. It's just for the undeads.” she assures you, Taehyung immediately nods.
“Come on, if there is food you can take some of it. I'm sure there is enough.”
You hesitantly look at Johnny as Zoya snickers next to you. “Don't worry about that idiot. If there's a problem we will just give you our shares.”
Taehyung nods, motioning your head to follow them. Not that Zoya gives you too much of a choice, she keeps a hold on your forearm as you approach Yoongi and Johnny hesitantly.
“The sound will just attract them,” Yoongi comments, frowning at the gun. “Why do you think we haven't used guns in the middle of the night?”
Wait–guns? They have more than one?
“Do you have a better idea?” Johnny remarks, glaring at Yoongi from his crouched position as he slings his backpack across his shoulder.
“We have to try, Yoongi. If there is food, we can have enough supplies for another month or two.” Taehyung reminds him, causing the man to think before he gives a nod.
“But be aware and listen to every little sound.” Yoongi reminds the group, staring at each of them as if he is giving them an order, his eyes falling onto you momentarily.
His stare is cold, even if it barely lasts a second but you know he doesn't want you here. He probably wonders what the hell are you still doing here. However, he doesn't comment on it as he fully focuses on Johnny who aims the gun at the lock.
“Be careful, the sound is not really pretty.” Taehyung murmurs into your ear as you nod, expecting a loud sound to come from the gun.
And it comes, loud and clear despite the silencer used on the gun, causing you to jump. Zoya slightly jumps next to you but the guys seem like they're already used to it, not even flinching. The lock is destroyed immediately, falling onto the ground with a loud crash as everyone stays unmoving and silent. There are no sounds, Yoongi giving a nod as he pulls out a knife, much bigger one than he gave you (which is still laying on the floor where he tossed it, your hands full with holding the bottle and the can).
Johnny opens the door but Yoongi is the first one to walk into the room, your breath hitching at his bravery of going into a dark room when he has no idea what's behind the door.
They're wary, Johnny joins Yoongi right away with a gun pointed at whatever that could mean danger. Taehyung, Zoya and you are the last one to follow them, Taehyung pulling out his own knife while Zoya does the same.
“You should put this down, just in case,” Zoya tells you, pointing at the food in your hands. “No one will take it, trust me.” she says, laughing a little at your widened eyes.
And then she pulls out another knife, the one that looks exactly the same Yoongi gave you. Your widened eyes make her chuckle.
“You should've taken this with you first. This one will save your life, a bottle of water and canned peas won't.”
You listen to her, letting her take the stuff from you as she quickly puts it into her backpack, telling you she will give it back to you. You're not sure if you can trust her but there's nothing much you can do anyway. She hands you the knife Yoongi so “kindly” gave to you. You don't remember her picking it up. You are so nervous and constantly on edge that you don't know what to notice first.
The room is dark but illuminated with everyone's flashlight.
“It looks like nobody was here.” Taehyung comments, shining his flashlight at the food supplies.
There are tall shelves with a bunch of canned food, most food already rotting and spoiled which explains the unpleasant smell in the room.
“Bingo.” Yoongi mutters, noticing not only the amount of food but also water and some beer.
You don't even have a backpack to put the food into, you think as they start loading their backpacks and bags with food.
“Don't worry, I have an extra bag.” Taheuyng tells you softly as he notices your distraught and you give him a slight smile in return, silently thanking him.
“Oh my god, how much I missed ramen.” Zoya cries out dramatically, her arms taking as much as they can as Johnny and Taehyung snicker at her, although sharing her joy with her.
“Man, I can't wait to have beer.” Johnny says, almost whining at the carton of beer.
This supply room is clearly untouched, nobody made their way here to take all the food. It had to be locked even before the apocalypse happened. It would explain the full shelves and spoiled fruit, vegetables and other food that has a short expiration date.
The rustle sounds of everyone packing the food is the only thing heard for a moment, as you squint your eyes in the distance noticing another shelf hidden behind the corner. You slowly make your way there, wanting to get useful and maybe discover more food.
Nobody notices you, you're still in the same room and not that any of them truly cares – they came here for food after all. You don't belong with them.
You clasp your hand over your mouth at the sudden stench, undoubtedly more spoiled food in this section. This is where the main smell has to come from. It's too dark for you to make out what kind of food it is and as you squint your eyes even more, trying to figure out if any of it is edible and in good state, you hear a faint growling and grunting which makes you freeze.
You've heard it before. Not many times but it's unmistakable because the single sound makes you tremble with fear. Backing away, you whimper as the sounds start coming closer and you make out a shape of someone, of something coming out of the shadows. Undead.
And then it hurls at you as it spots you, or smells you, causing a scream rip out of your mouth as you start backing away fastly. But your feet stumble in the rush of everything, causing you to fall to the ground as you start to kick the undead that falls too, bringing some of the items on the shelf with it with a loud clunk. It grabs you by your ankle, your eyes watering as you scream and join the others in the room by backing away from it on your butt.
It happens too fast for you to even grasp it, the undead tries to grab your ankle and bite into your living flesh, its movements slow but enough to terrify you with its need to eat you out alive. Before it can make any further movements, a knife is stabbed through its brain as the undead stops immediately, falling onto the floor.
The first thing you see as you look up is Yoongi, staring down at you with stern eyes.
“Oh my god, are you okay? Are you bitten?” Taehyung asks immediately, crouching down next to you as he helps you to stand up and pulls up your shaking form.
You shake your head at his question. It almost bit you.
Yoongi then glances at the knife, his knife, in your hands as he's about to walk past you but not until he stops next to you.
“What do you have that for, huh?” he spits, your entire form flinching how cold he sounds as Taehyung mumbles his name in disappointment. “No, Taehyung. She needs to learn how to defend herself.”
“She clearly doesn't know how to! Not everyone is ready to fight right away!” Taehyung exclaims, as if he reminds him of something but Yoongi's expression stays stoic before he glares at you.
“She better learn or she will be dead before the sun comes up.”
“Yoongi is right, if she's just gonna run away every time, it's just a matter of time before she gets killed and turns into one of them.” Johnny joins.
Their cold words make you flinch as Taehyung squeezes your forearm in support while Zoya glares at Johnny.
“You're just kissing Yoongi's ass.” Zoya remarks, Johnny glaring back at her.
But you know they are right. You will never make it if you won't be able to kill undead.
“Maybe that's why she needs us.” Taehyung's deep voice booms as he frowns at Yoongi.
“I said no.”
“Yoongi!” Taehyung exclaims in disbelief. “You know she will never gonna make it. You seriously want her to die?”
“We can take care of everyone we stumble upon, Taehyung.” he reminds him harshly.
“It's okay…” you tell Taehyung with a soft tone but he just glances at you disapprovingly.
“No, it's not,” he scolds you, “Yoongi, are you really that heartless?”
“I'm fucking taking care of all of you!” Yoongi suddenly screams, throwing his hands angrily as that shuts up Taehyung while Zoya flinches and Johnny grows silent. “I can't take care of everyone.” he says more calmly.
“Taehyung, right?” you ask silently, your soft voice booming in the suddenly quiet room as Taehyung nods in confirmation. “It's okay, Taehyung.” you assure him, despite the tears rushing to your eyes at the thought of being alone once again.
Yoongi just saved your life.
If they weren't here, you would probably be dead. Maybe not at this exact time because you wouldn't be able to open the supply room you're standing in right now by yourself. But like Yoongi said, you will be dead by the time the sun comes up.
Taehyung can't even look you in the eyes, his own features twisted in anger but most importantly sadness because there's nothing he can do. From what you understood, Yoongi has the final word and he doesn't want you to join them.
“I,” Taehyung starts, turning around as he takes a bag off the ground and tries to hand it to you. “I packed you some food. It should last for at least a month.” Yeah, if you will ever make it for a month.
He still doesn't look you in the eyes while Zoya watches you interact with empathic eyes. Yoongi stares with a cold expression while even Johnny looks a little pitiful at the sight of you.
Zoya sniffles, suddenly rummaging through her backpack as she hands you the stupid canned peas and the bottle you got from Taehyung.
You take it, clutching it to your chest as you ignore Taehyung's hand, not taking the bag from him.
“Keep it.” you tell him, his head snapping towards you immediately as he widens his eyes, looking shockingly at you.
“What? Why?” he breathes out, “Do you want more? I can give you some of mine. Please, take it. At least you won't have to go search for more food.” he tries to tell you quickly but you just simply shake your head, giving him a slightly saddened smile.
“I probably won't make it, I won't eat all of this food. You need it more,” you tell him, voice shaky as you angrily blink away the tears. Then you look at all of them. “All of you,”
Taehyung gasps, Zoya shaking her head at you but you ignore them, gently pushing Taehyung's hand away from you.
Giving Taehyung one last smile, you see his own eyes watering but you straighten yourself, ignoring it. “Thanks for the water,”
And then you look at Yoongi, his dark and emotionless eyes watching you. You should be mad at him. You are not.
You hate how angry you feel at yourself for not being strong enough, having to rely on others.
“And the knife… and for saving my life.” you say quietly to him, biting into your lip as you quickly make it out of the room.
Yoongi is met with one of the deepest glares he has seen on Taehyung and Zoya once you are out of the room. Johnny stays quiet though, knowing that's what life is about now. He might not be the person with the kindest heart but he did feel bad for you. Surely, he wouldn't want to be in your place right now.
“I can't believe you.” Taehyung spits at him, eyes watering.
“You just met her, you don't even know her. You really want to bring a stranger to the rest?” Yoongi asks sternly, Taehyung gulping as he's reminded of other friends that are waiting for them.
They are already low on the food supplies, even with what they have found right now, they will still have to move and search for more food. There is not a place that is completely safe.
“This store is in the middle of nowhere. We are surrounded by woods.” Taehyung comments through clenched teeth, causing Yoongi to scoff because the younger one doesn't listen to him.
“She can be dangerous.” Johnny suddenly says, taking Yoongi's side as always but that's not surprising which causes both Taehyung and Zoya to scoff.
“It's bullshit and you know it. She doesn't know how to defend herself, she would be dead if it weren't for Yoongi and you both know it.” Zoya spits.
“She might not be able to hurt us but she is still a stranger. She still can be dangerous. Are you hundred percent sure she won't steal our medicine and food once she has the chance?” Yoongi asks angrily, causing Taehyung to clench his jaw as Zoya does the same.
Still, she straightens herself and holds her head high as she faces Yoongi.
“She gave up the food and left it to us because she knows she's gonna die either way.” Zoya says brokenly and that's when for the first time, Yoongi looks away.
Jaw clenched tightly, it flexes under the pressure he puts into it as he rubs the bridge of his nose. “For fucks sake.”
And then he's out of the room, walking down the aisles to leave the store.
You are nowhere in sight and a part of him hopes you are already gone. It's selfish of him, he knows that. It's so fucking selfish but he needs to take care of his close friends. It's already tough as it is, they can't bring another person with how low they are running on everything. Plus, you can't even fight and he can't keep his eye on you every time you stumble upon some danger. You will just put them all in more danger.
He wonders how it is possible that you've made it out to this store that's settled far away from the city, surrounded by woods and trees. You had to walk here until it got dark, that's the only explanation he has.
And he looks left and right, a part of him still hoping you went into the woods and he can tell others he tried (because he did) but he couldn't find you.
But there you are.
Walking just a few meters away from him, making your way down the driveway. Your steps are slow, you don't rush anywhere and it's more than clear why. You have nowhere to go and you know your end is nearing.
Woods are full of undead, you will never make it by yourself and by walking.
Cursing under his breath, he grumbles as he starts walking towards you.
You're angrily wiping your tears, putting the knife into your pocket as it sticks out but you don't care. Will you even use it? Sure, it's practical and you're not giving up. But you're also not stupid and you know you're not skilled to fully defend yourself from undeads.
“Wait!”
You stop, turning around to find Yoongi standing not far away from the store.
Then you notice the others making it out of the store with bags and backpacks full, eyes watching you as you nibble on your bottom lip as you slowly make your way back to them.
Did you forget something?
Do they want to offer you more food? You already told them you don't need it.
What's the point?
You can't feel your legs. You've been walking here for hours, which is usually just a twenty minutes drive by a car. You are tired. You can't possibly carry a heavy bag.
Stopping a few meters away from Yoongi, just enough to see and hear him as he watches you attentively. You don't make a sound though, both of you just standing there until an irritated sound makes it out of Yoongi's mouth.
The others stay in front of the store, not jumping into this interaction – or whatever this is.
“You can join us.”
It's simple, yet it leaves a bitter feeling in your chest. He sounds unwilling, as if it's the last thing he wants you to do and you know that's exactly what it is. Johnny, the man with slightly longer hair falling into his face and big eyes, most likely agrees with him.
“It's fine.” you tell him, hating how broken you sound but your voice still comes out strong despite its shakiness.
“So, that's it? You suddenly don't need our help?” he asks angrily, growing even more irritated by you as you stare at him with nothing but emptiness, until you scoff at turn around.
Meanwhile Taehyung watches the interaction from afar, his mouth opens and face drops in sadness while Zoya looks anxious next to Johnny who simply watches and waits for what's going to happen.
“Why would you want to help me?” you ask him silently, voice completely opposite from Yoongi's as it comes out emotionless yet soft. “I can't fight. I'm scared. I will be just a burden.”
He fucking knows that.
“So, you're just gonna give up?” he asks, scoffing in both annoyance and disbelief.
“What's there left for me to do?” you ask quietly, almost whispering it into the night but Yoongi hears every word.
Are you stupid?
“You learn how to fight. You learn how to survive.”
It sounds simple from his mouth. Will you ever be ready for that?
You have no one to survive for.
Your family is probably dead for all you know. You have lost contact with them since it happened and there is no way you can get to your home country. Your friends lived in a part of the city full of undeads around every corner. You would be dead even before you could make it to the part of their city.
“I'm all alone,” you tell him angrily, but you know it's just the sadness speaking out of you. “Who am I going to survive for?”
“Yourself,” Yoongi answers immediately, frustratedly brushing his fingers through his hair.
You would rather be dead than by yourself.
You don't realize you mumble those words under your breath, turning around from him and the group that funnily enough, turned out to save your life and scare the shit out of you at the same time.
“Just let us fucking help.” he growls, causing you to stop in your tracks as you slowly turn back to him.
That's when Taehyung and Zoya rushes to you two, Johnny following as well holding Yoongi's backpack along with his and a few bags.
“You can't just leave,” Taehyung pleads with you, “You will be safe with us. We will take care of you.”
Yoongi clenches his jaw but stays silent, though you see the way he really doesn't want you to join them. For some reason, he's against it but still stands here and offers you the help. Why? Because Taehyung and Zoya persuaded him?
“She will learn how to fight and will help us to get stuff for everyone,” Yoongi corrects, dominantly as Taehyung still stares at you with a hopeful gaze. “You will be safe with us, will have food to eat and a place to sleep in. That's my offer.” he says, staring right at you as you glance between him and Taehyung who pleads with you with his eyes.
“Don't be stupid,” Zoya says to you, “You know we are your only chance.”
“Zoya's right,” Taehyung reacts immediately, “You don't have to be alone.”
As much as your old self never wanted to depend on somebody else, things change when your own life is at stake. Especially if there's a high possibility you will be killed and eaten alive by a monster and later on, you will become one of them.
“I'm going to the car.” Yoongi suddenly says, dismissing this conversation as he walks past you.
Johnny follows him, giving you a look as he brushes past you but not before he momentarily stops and leans down to you without even looking at you. “Don't be stupid.” he says quietly, joining Yoongi as you see them approaching an old Jeep.
You were wondering where that car appeared from. It's theirs.
“I'm not taking a no for an answer,” Taehyung approaches you, frowning at you as if he's disappointed they even have to ask you to come with them.
You understand them. They pity you and you don't blame them. You would be acting the same way if you saw a lonely person against the whole world with no chance to survive.
“We will protect you.”
Zoya nods along to Taehyung's voice, squeezing your shoulder as you slightly flinch at the surprising touch. You look at her, seeing her features soften as she's close to you.
“Come on, you can leave whenever you want to. We won't hold you hostage.”
Before you can utter a single word, Taehyung is already grabbing you by your wrist and leading you towards the car where Johnny and Yoongi are loading the truck with backpacks and bags of food.
They don't notice you, Yoongi opening the driver's door as he slips inside the car as Johnny does the same with the passenger seat.
Taehyung ushers you into the car and you let him, appreciating how warm it feels and smells of vanilla. He goes to put Zoya's and his backpack into the truck, taking your things away from you with an encouraging smile.
Zoya does the same, wanting to assure you it's going to be fine and there's no need to be unsure about your decision to come with them. You know it's your only way of survival.
They are.
When you face forward, you catch Yoongi's eyes in the rear mirror, seeing them clearer than ever as they seem to be even sharper and darker than you thought.
Quickly looking away, your attention is taken away as Taehyung slips into the seat next to you, telling Yoongi everything's ready. He turns on the engine and puts the car into drive.
The vandalised store is slowly drifting away as you drive out of the parking lot and make it onto the highway.
#networkbangtan#ksmutclub#btswritingcafe#ficswithluv#bts smut#yoongi x reader#bts angst#bts fluff#bts au#yoongi fic#personasintro
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Can your write a longer version of the Romanov (Romanoff) teacher x fem reader and/or with Carol Danvers or Yelena Belova? (I know she is her sister but they aren’t really)
And I’ll buy you two cups of coffee. Or if u do All three characters, (not at once but maybe eventually in another story), I’ll buy u 4 cups 🥰
F-four cups?? Bdosskdskssosjs I'm on it!!
2.8k words
Warnings: teacher!Natasha X student!reader, teacher!Carol X student!reader, unhealthy power dynamic, dub-con (not really?? Putting it to be safe) age gap (R is 18), smoking, being caned, praise, degrading, strap on sex, oral on strap on, gagging and overstimulation
[ masterlist ]
Buy me a coffee ☕
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Your head fell back against the brick wall as you exhaled heavily and let the thick smoke escape your parched mouth. You stared up at the clouds amongst the perfectly blue sky and made out various shapes the clouds displayed, each telling their own story. You smiled when you spotted a laughing dragon.
"Y/n." Came a snappy voice that pulled you from your daydreaming. You recognised the voice instantly and clenched your teeth together as you dropped your joint to the floor and stepped on it.
"Yes, Miss Romanoff?" You rolled your eyes and glared at the teacher approaching you.
"You know smoking is not permitted on these grounds. Neither are the those." The redhead stated as she eyed the the packet in your pocket and held her hand out for it. You begrudgingly handed it over.
"Detention. 7 o'clock. Do not be late." She warned before heading back towards the old building. You continued to glare daggers into her back as you watched her leave, those damn hips swaying with every step.
You would be the first to admit your teacher was hot. With all those curves and a look to kill, yes you were attracted to her. But there was a lot of teachers at the school that were easy on the eyes. The difference with Natasha was she seemed spent on making your life at that school a living hell.
It felt like she was always out to get you, giving you detentions left and right and shouting at you for seemingly nothing. So being attracted to her while she played the role of the your own personal guardian devil wasn't easy. Plus: it was beyond frustrating being horny at a boarding school.
The day dragged by after that. Every time you looked up at the clock on a classroom wall it had barely changed. You just wanted the day to be over with.
Finally, 7 o'clock came and you dragged yourself to Natasha's classroom a few minutes late. You would be lying if you said you hadn't deliberately been late to piss her off. Not to mention you had made it quite the habit with your teacher. You were a sucker for tradition.
"I do hope that one day you'll learn the importance of being punctual." Natasha said from her desk where she didn't look up from marking.
"I guess today just isn't that day." You said as you slouched down in your seat in the back row.
You frowned as you noticed a workbook wasn't placed on your desk already. That was usually all your detentions consisted of, you doing more work. You looked up and saw Natasha watching you darkly. You struggled to hold her gaze for more than a couple seconds.
"On the contrary, y/n. I think today is exactly that day." She said with a small smile you didn't trust at all. You rarely saw her smile. Brief, forced ones towards her colleagues was all you thought she was capable of. But the one she gave you, it was hiding something.
"Come here." She said suddenly and you found yourself getting to your feet rather hastily.
You made your way down the room and stood infront of your teachers desk with some nerves. While you had never strived to piss off any teachers, their threats never seemed to scare you because you knew there was nothing they could really do. It never got any worse than a series of tedious detentions. But you found yourself not wanting to test your teacher that evening.
Natasha stood up from her chair and put the papers to the side before walking around the desk and past you. You didn't look back to see what she was doing but you could hear her open the door to her supply room. There was one in every room in the generously sized school. All stocked with books and alike, but you had never seen the inside of Miss Romanoff's supply room, it was always too dim.
Her heels clicked against the wooden floor as she made her way back to you. You still didn't dare turn around, maybe if you had Natasha wouldn't have pushed your back down with alarming force that had your front pressed against her table in less than a second.
You gave a startled cry in alarm and went to get back up but Natasha's hand stayed firmly between your shoulder blades and forced you to stay flat against the desk.
"Miss!" You called but she didn't respond. Instead, her other hand wandered up the back of your left thigh. Her touch was light as a feather and it brought out an involuntary shudder from you despite the screaming in your head.
Natasha then hiked your skirt up over your hips. You stayed silent at the act. In shock more than anything else. Perhaps part of you wanted to know what she was planning.
What you didn't expect was to feel a sharp sting across your ass and a cracking sound echo across the room. You cried out again and tried to get off the desk but your teacher was too strong.
"What the fuck was that?" You demanded as your ass continued to sting furiously.
"I thought some old school punishment would fit you better, y/n. Nothing else quite seems to suffice." She explained and brought the cane back down on your thinly covered ass. You jerked forwards and gripped on to the edge of the desk firmly as another cry was ripped from your throat.
She hummed in consideration for a moment, most likely pausing for an extra second just to taunt you, before dipping her fingers under the waist band of your panties and pulled them down your legs. You whimpered quietly and pressed your thighs tightly together, not wanting your teacher to see any possible and surprising signs of what her actions were doing to you.
When your panties were at your feet you breathing became more shallow and you awaited the next strike in fear.
"I think ten strikes will suffice." She declared and your eyes widened. "But let's not forget I also have to teach you the importance of punctuality. How many minutes late were you, y/n? Seven?"
"Please." Spilled from your lips. You weren't sure you could handle seventeen strikes from the devil crafted stick in you teacher's hand.
"You can take it, darling. After all," She started as she leant forward to whisper in your ear, "Daddy knows best." You shivered from her words and tried to ignore the way they seemed to travel through your body.
A harsh strike came down suddenly and you cried out pathetically and gripped on to the desk like a lifeline. The cane in harsh, random strikes after that, each one as unpredictable as the last and all of them hurting more.
Tears sprung to your eyes and yet every hit added to your arousal that filled you with shame. You were sure Natasha noticed it because every time you pressed your thighs together she kicked your legs apart again, surely seeing your wetness as she did so.
"That's it, sweetheart, it's done." Natasha cooed as she ran her cold hand over your throbbing ass. "You took it so well." You flinched from the contact but luckily she didn't linger too long on the broken skin, instead letting her hand drop further down.
You couldn't help the breathy whine that escaped your lips. "Perhaps too well." Natasha mused as her slender fingers glided over your glistening folds. You leaned back into her touch and was partly surprised that she let you, consequently slipping the tips of her fingers through your folds.
You whined louder at the teasing contact but Natasha withdrew her hands and instead smacked your pussy hard. You lurched forward and moaned at the impact.
"Come here." Natasha said but didn't give you much chance to respond because she gripped the back of your shirt and hauled you through the room. You stumbled the whole way but didn't dare question your teacher. She pushed you into the storage room, much to your confusion, until you stumbled into what felt like a table and the dim light flickered on.
Your breath caught in your throat as you caught sight of all the packed shelves around the room. There were more sex toys in the surprisingly small room than you could even process with more range than you could ever beging to fantasise about.
You admired as many as you could in the time Natasha stripped herself of her clothing and stepped infront of you to pick out a dildo to attatch to the harness she wore. Her eyes raked over the large collection and landed on one of the biggest with a confident smirk on her face. She grabbed the toy and some lube and stepped behind you again where she attatched the toy and prepared it with the lube before tangling her hand in your hair to hold you against the oak table.
"You like my collection, sweetheart?" Natasha asked as she ran the strap through your folds. You hummed vaguely, too caught up in the thought of her using the toy on you.
"Answer me, slut." Natasha said lowly and thrust the strap in.
You moaned loudly as your teacher pushed more of the inches in and you squirmed beneath her. She gave another harsh thrust and burried the rest of the strap in to your pussy.
"Well?" She asked teasingly as she withdrew the toy only to slam it back forwards harshly.
"Yes!" You cried out as you squeezed your eyes shut.
"Yes what?" She tested.
"Yes, daddy!" You moaned in bliss and desperation.
"Fuck, this pussy's so tight." Natasha smirked above you, no doubt knowing the slight buzz of pain you were feeling at the stretch of her toy. You moaned in response as she continued to thrust the toy in at a merciless pace.
You were so lost in the overwhelming pleasure Natasha was giving you you were unaware if anything that wasn't her or the toy. Even the cold surface of the table pressed so harshly against you had slipped from your mind. So it was no surprise you didn't hear the heavy footsteps entering the room.
"Evening, Danvers." Natasha greeted and your eyes snapped open. You tried to look back at who ever Natasha was talking to but she gripped your hair tighter and held your head down against the desk making you whimper.
"You finally did it, huh." Came the voice from behind you that you definitely recognised. "And I thought you were chicken shit." She mused.
You whimpered when you felt a hand snake down to your clit and rub the neglected spot slowly. But it was gone barely a second after it came.
"Wait your fucking turn, Danvers." Natasha spat at the blonde but you whined desperately.
"Please, daddy!" You begged, missing the contact instantly.
"I think the little whore wants me more." Carol chuckled and Natasha snapped her hips particularly hard at her words.
"Oh but she's going to cum all for me now, aren't you, y/n?"
"Please, please!" You begged more as Natasha's pace increased and you moaned more frantically, still trying to get a look at the blonde.
"Fucking cum." She demanded and at that, you lost all control. You clenched around the fake cock and trembled on the table as the brutal waves if your orgasm washed over you again and again.
But to your distraught, Natasha pulled the strap out as you came and effectively ruined the full effects of your high. You whimpered again at the loss but your legs felt too numb to fully do anything about it.
"Don't be so ungrateful." Natasha warned as she slapped your pussy making you jump slightly.
Carol stood infront of you as she started to unbuckle her belt and freed the strap she had been packing underneath.
"You're gonna use that slutty mouth to get my cock ready for your pussy now, Princess." Carol explained as she tapped the head against your cheek. You happily obliged and opened your mouth for the strap that Carol wasted no time in easing in.
She held your head in place where Natasha had let go and pushed the strap against your gag reflex. You coughed around the toy but the blonde shushed you as she kept pushing forward in a thoughtful silence, admiring the tears that sprung to your eyes.
"You look so pretty with my cock in your mouth." Carol muttered as she withdrew the strap slightly only to snap her hips forwards to effectively fuck your mouth. "You want it in your slutty hole now?" She asked with faux sweetness.
"She'll take whatever you give her." Natasha mused. You looked up and saw her in a dark red chair against the wall facing you, her eyes glued to your form.
Carol slipped the strap from your mouth when she deemed you had done a good enough job. It glistened in the dim light and disappeared from sight when your other teacher strolled back behind you.
You locked eyes with your red headed teacher as you felt Carol's presence behind you. Natasha pulled something from the cabinet besides her that you instantly registered as your amateur cigarette and the little tobacco that was still in the bag. She chuckled at the rookie joint you had made yourself but you didn't have much chance to feel any embarrassment or annoyance because the woman behind you gripped onto your hips tightly and pushed the entirety of the toy in in one thrust forward.
You moan was bordering on a scream at the action. Carol set about a merciless pace that rivalled your other teacher's and had you trembling instantly. You gripped on to the edge of the table tightly and babbled incoherently about how good it felt and pathetic pleas not to stop, all of which Carol had no issue aiding. She pounded the strap into you and revelled in your pleasured cries all while you tried desperately to hold eye contact with Natasha.
The red head was looking through her cabinet again until you brought out a box of Humidor cigars that probably cost more than a year at your school. Your cheap tobacco had been thrown to the side as she lit the expensive cigar all while smirking at you and your limited responses to her.
She brought it up to your lips with a knowing smile but you had no energy or ability to make an annoyed comment about how unfair the teacher student hierarchy was because Carol's pace seemed to increase.
"Don't stop!" You managed to cry out to the blonde. You clenched around the strap desperately as your breathing increased and.you could feel your high approaching at a fast rate.
"Cum, slut." The blonde ordered and with that, you fell apart again. You bucked back against the strap as Carol fucked your through your orgasm and kept going. You were becoming sensitive from the intense pleasure you had been feeling and all of a sudden it became too much.
You thought Carol stopped when she pulled out, but she swiftly flipped you on to your front and sunk the strap back in. Your head threw back as you moaned lowly and instinctively wrapped your legs around your teacher's waist to help you handle her deep thrusts.
"I want to see you cum this time." Carol said as she eyed you greedily.
You felt a pair of soft lips meet your exposed neck and turned your head away more to give Natasha's wandering lips further access. Her hands crept up under your shirt and massaged the soft skin contained by your bra. She pinched your nipples as she sucked and lightly nipped at your neck, all while the blonde continued to fuck you into your next orgasm.
You gasped before giving a long moan in relief as your third orgasm washed over your body. You trembled in the women's gripped as they guided you through your high that had you seeing stars.
Your head fell back against the table with a light thud as you tried to steady your breathing.
"Fuck." Carol smirked as she combed her hair back away from her face and grinned down at your body arrogantly. "We're going to have to do that again." She sighed as she pulled the strap out slowly making you whine.
"You want that baby? You want to be our secret slut?" Natasha muttered into your ear and bit down gently. You groaned and nodded your head in response.
"Please." You whispered, your voice going hoarse.
"That's a good girl." Natasha praised as her hand wandered down your body again.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
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dirty little secret | (m)
pairings: jock!eren yeager x fem!reader
warnings: nsfw, dub con, cheating, creampie, oral sex (male receiving), mouth fucking, saliva, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, sneaky sex, explicit language
words: 3.2k+
summary: eren’s unsatisfied in his relationship with his girlfriend, so he looks to you for sexual gratification.
a/n: all the characters in this story are adults! it was originally meant to be a college au but the whole “fire drill” detail doesn’t really make sense in a college setting since fire drills are typically held in dorms, so as per usual 18+ minors dni.
Your legs moved quickly against the polished tile of the hallway while you sped up to meet with your class who had already been far ahead of you, disappearing into the throng of people filing outside at the blaring signal of the fire alarm.
You’d excused yourself during your lesson to use the bathroom, unaware that an unplanned drill had been scheduled for that day, so with haste you finished up and rushed to rendezvous with the rest of your classmates before you were left inside the building.
As you rounded the corner, you felt a pair of hands wrap around your forearm, forcibly pulling you behind the small door that stood at the end of the corridor.
Instinctively, your hands balled into fists, and you threw them blindly in the direction of your assailant. You hoped that you’d at least land one successful hit, and it would give you enough time to break out of their hold and flee.
“Y/N, relax! It’s just me!”
Your hysterical flailing ceased, and you opened your eyes hesitantly at the sound of your attacker’s familiar voice. “Eren?”
Frantic pupils fell upon a pair of mischievous jade eyes, and your terror-stricken expression contorted into an angry scowl as you drove the palms of your hands into his chest, sending him careening back into the metal shelf behind him. “You asshole! What is wrong with you?”
Eren’s quick reflexes allowed him to catch himself and the rack before both were sent tumbling to the floor. “Ow,” he grumbled, rubbing away the soreness spreading over the skin of his arm from your knuckles’ potent impact. “You’ve got a brutal left hook.”
“Yeah? You wanna see my right one?” Your right hand tightened as if you were projecting another throw, but Eren’s outstretched arm maintained a safe amount of space between you two. “What the hell are you doing in here?”
Eren’s tightly-wound eyebrows began to arch as his distressed face eased into a buoyant grin. “I wanted to see you. I missed you.”
You blinked. “Were you the one that pulled the fire alarm?”
“No, I didn’t pull the fucking fire alarm,” he replied sourly, evidently offended that you’d suggest he’d do something so juvenile. “I just got lucky.”
Your curled lip relaxed, and your irritation waned into a resigned stare. You desperately wanted to trust Eren’s saccharine words, and it didn’t take much effort to believe him while you were faced with his stupidly winsome expression. His smile was warm, eyes glossing over with adoration like he was truly expressing what he felt, and it wasn’t just empty flattery, yet you’d been more perceptive than to just take his intentions for what they were. Rather, you’d been smart enough to learn from last time.
He’d said something along the same lines, after you two had hooked up in his car after his lacrosse game. He was feeling mirthful after winning and wanted to celebrate with you, but on the cusp of his orgasm, he’d let the “love” phrase slip, and when you’d asked him about it afterward, Eren mulled over it for a second before nodding, admitting that he had feelings for you.
His confession had been somewhat of a relief, and you’d expected him to end things with his girlfriend shortly after he’d realized what he really wanted, but the following day in the courtyard, you were stunned to see Eren sitting with her and the rest of his friends, showering her with kisses like nothing had taken place the night before.
You swore you’d learned your lesson.
“Are these new? Can I see them?” Eren’s fingers gently wrapped around the frame of your glasses, pulling them from your face, and he slid them onto his ears, adjusting their position on his nose. “How do I look?”
“I can’t see, Eren,” you answered simply.
Eren laughed bashfully. “Right, I think they look better on you instead.” He slid your glasses off and tucked them back behind your ears.
Your lenses restored your lucid vision, and now that you could properly see, you noticed the way Eren’s lips were parted, lids low and languid as his face lingered only inches from yours. He’d used your glasses as leverage to get closer to you, a crafty technique, and now that he was close enough, he could whisper.
“You know what else looks better on you?” The corner of his mouth quirked upwards into his cheek, and he closed the space between you two, fixing his lips onto yours while his thumb and index finger supported the curve of your chin. His kiss was slow, mouth undulating with the most tender of movements, and when he carefully slid his tongue between your teeth you could taste the vague chill of spearmint on his breath. He proceeded timidly, as though he was touching you for the first time, but that was the very detail of your couplings that always had you running back. He handled you like he cared.
The tip of Eren’s nose skimmed against yours, ever so slightly, while he continued prompting his tongue further into the depths of your mouth, eager to have you savor his desire.
Your body was traitorous and unmoving, allowing Eren to command you with his lips, and for a few blissful minutes, you forgot the two of you were crammed into the unyielding space of a storage room.
Eren withdrew from your mouth, and tilted his head to the side so he could occupy the empty curve of your neck, and once you felt him press mild kisses to the hollow of your throat, you freed a displeased sigh and sent him backwards with an assertive push.
“Seriously? In the supply closet?”
“We’ve got like fifteen minutes before everyone comes back.” He reassured you, shrugging dismissively before tipping his head in for another kiss.
You shifted backward, studying Eren as he continued to lean in until his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Wondering why he wasn’t receiving any contact, his eyes flitted open.
“You still haven’t broken up with her have you?” You pressed your lips into an unamused line.
Your question had Eren angling until he was standing upright, and then he rolled his head back and released a groan as though already tired from your question. “Y/N, come on. I don’t feel like having this conversation.”
“Have you?” you probed.
“No, I haven’t. It’s not that easy.”
“It really is.”
Eren drew his eyebrows up, now in regret. “We’ve been together since freshman year. Do you know how big of a douchebag it makes me look if I break up with her two months before graduation?”
You scoffed, folding your arms across your chest. “Do you know how big of a douchebag you look fucking me behind her back?”
Eren’s eyes drifted to the side.
“Or are you just embarrassed to be seen with me?” you questioned, canting your body into his view.
“Okay, you sound ridiculous,” Eren laughed dryly.
“Because I’m not a cheerleader or an athlete, and I have about one other friend. You don’t want everyone to know you’re fucking the girl that spends lunch in the library.”
“What kind of cliche movie do you think we’re in right now?”
“It’s just something I’d expect from someone who peaked in high school.” Your words were sharp on the tip of your tongue, and you could tell by the way Eren recoiled that your statement managed to penetrate his seemingly careless guise.
“I’ll handle it okay?” Eren’s hand slid over the back of his neck, looking blameworthy of all the faults you’d accused him of. “But right now I really need help handling something else.”
Your eyes narrowed in his direction after realizing he’d managed to do it again, forcing you into forgiveness with his charming abashed impression. He’d taken advantage of how spineless you were when it came to matters concerning him.
“Please?” he urged.
It was his thick brown brows that were creased in the middle and opalescent green eyes that stared you down that made him look so sincere. He was easily one of the most spellbinding people you’d ever met, attractive and likable, he knew exactly what cards to play to get his way, and even though you were aware of it, you always found yourself wrapped around his finger. A pretty face and a sweet tongue was a recipe written up by the devil himself.
You lowered yourself onto your knees, leveled with Eren’s hands working swiftly against the buttons of his slacks. “I’m done doing this, Yeager,” you announced wryly.
“I know,” Eren said, as though guaranteeing you it would be the last time.
He pushed his pants down along with his briefs in one swift motion, freeing his cock from the tight cotton confines of his underwear. His length was already rigid, the sticky beads of precum leaking out of his swollen head the result of your stalling. He’d already provoked himself by thinking of all the ways he wanted to have you, you didn’t have to do anything more to get him hard.
A relieved exhale left Eren’s lips once he grabbed the base of his cock in the sweaty heat of his palm, tapping his wet tip against your bottom lip, then he pulled the hem of his shirt up slightly, allowing you enough clearance to take him into your mouth.
You wrapped a ginger hand around his length, feeling the way his warmth throbbed in your fingers, and you leaned in, using your tongue to lap along the rim of his cock.
“Fuck—” Eren’s voice was husky as it ripped through the depths of his throat. He watched you with heavy lids, observing the way your tongue’s tip danced around his swollen head, giving coy licks to his slit, and the way his cock twitched with need at the slightest provocation. “Jesus Christ—”
You gave him a few generous pumps before taking him whole, humming at the way his girth felt against the inside of your cheeks. The skin of his length ran like hot silk over your tongue as you fell into a natural rhythm, and your lips and hand rocked back and forth against him.
Eren’s face broke out into a dirty grin. “You’re such a little slut for my cock, aren’t you?”
You glared up at him over the edge of your glasses.
“Sorry,” he responded meekly, fingers brushing away the strands of hair that fell loosely against his forehead.
You continued working against him, excited by the honeyed melody of his moans every time your fingertips ran over the sensitive skin of his balls. Eren’s cock pulsated against the surface of your tongue with each small ministration, and you watched the muscles across his abdomen tense.
“I know you hate me,” he started. “But you have no idea how hot you look on your knees right now. Keep glaring at me like that, and I’m gonna cum in your mouth.”
The mention of Eren’s warning had a torrent of heat surging between your legs, and you fought off the urge to dip your fingers beneath your skirt and begin rubbing away your discomfort. You didn’t want him to know you were enjoying this almost as much as he was.
Your heavy yet stifled breathing caused your glasses to fog lightly, so you sat back on your knees, withdrawing your mouth from him briefly to catch your breath. You lifted a thumb to wipe away at the saliva that dribbled down your chin, but Eren’s fast fingers stopped you, holding your wrist away from your face.
“Don’t,” he breathed. “You look pretty like that.”
You ran the back of your hand across your cheeks, as though you were trying to rub off the furious heat that crept across your skin and over your nose. “Shut up.”
Eren only responded with an amused smile.
Then when you brought him back to your lips for the last time, his hands settled on the crown of your head, and he pushed his cock back in until his tip relentlessly prodded the back of your throat. Holding your head in place, he began jerking his hips, fucking your mouth at an agonizingly slow pace that had heavy tears cascading down your cheeks.
Every time his cock slowly and deliberately pressed against the back of your throat, you gagged involuntarily, fingertips digging into the side of his thighs.
“Feel how hard I am?” Eren asked. “You did that.” He rocked his pelvis forward again, muffling your whines.
“Yeah? You like it when I fuck your pretty little face, don’t you?” He thrusted himself between your jaws, throwing his head back and liberating a series of foul swears. “I really need to feel you.”
With the declaration of his wish, he pulled his cock out of your mouth, inhaling sharply at the obscene sight of his length coated and dripping with your spit.
After your dry heaving subsided, Eren helped you up with a gentle hand, running his palm between your shoulder blades to soothe your coughing. He made sure you were steady before cuing you to turn so that your back was facing him, then he watched as your shaky hands slid underneath your skirt and fingers hooked around the fabric of your underwear.
“Pull out this time, Eren. I mean it,” you rasped, cautioning him ahead of time. You stepped out of your underwear and used the toe of your shoe to cast it aside.
Eren’s hands reached under your hem, large palms gliding over the curve of your ass. “The odds of you getting pregnant are like one in what?” He flipped up your skirt and continued teasing the skin of your backside. “Plus I always cover you for the pill, don’t I?”
“I don’t care, cum in me and you’re dead.” Your fingers gripped the edge of the metal shelf, and you slid your arm around Eren’s shoulder while he placed one hand on your waist for support and curved the other under your thigh. Then, he brought your knee up to his chest until all of your weight was allocated onto one leg.
Eren held his cock with his fingertips and slid himself between your folds from behind. You let out a soft, unanticipated whimper, but quickly brought your teeth down on the flesh of your tongue to smother any more sounds of pleasure. You didn’t even bother looking over your shoulder at Eren’s satisfied smirk, you could tell by the way his hand squeezed your thigh that he had noticed it.
Eren positioned himself at your entrance, skimming his wet tip over your hole before sliding himself inside you. His cock slipped in with ease, your saliva acting as a crude lubricant.
“Oh fuck—” His breath was hot over the span of your neck.
“Eren—” you sighed, forgetting all your pretenses. You closed your eyes, enjoying the way he stretched you out, and then he started moving causing a pattern of shallow cries and moans to fall from your lips.
“Fuck Y/N, you drive me fucking crazy,” Eren groaned, thrusting up into you, slowly and rhyhmically, steadily filling you to the hilt every time, while his hand traveled beneath your ribcage to cup your breast over the crisp fabric of your uniform. “She doesn’t take me as well as you do.”
You shook your head, making weak sounds of protest between delicate whines. “I don’t wanna hear that, Eren—”
“But it’s true.” Eren moved quickly between your legs, hissing every time your slick walls tightened around his aching cock. With each punctuated thrust, you continued to lose yourself, until your need unfurled and Eren had you under siege. His methodical pace sent you into a flurry of moans, and you cried his name over and over.
His even strokes began to stagger, and his breathing became rapid and shallow, chaotic pants of hot air rolling out over the span of your shoulder.
“I’m gonna cum—” He continued pounding into you, faster now, harder, keen on drawing out his orgasm, and then Eren gave one last thrust, so deep it had you shutting your eyes and pursing your lips to keep from screaming. Then he shuddered, his body convulsing with the bout of his orgasm, and you felt him release inside of you, thick, hot ropes of cum flooding your pussy with every twitch of his cock.
“Y/N—” he moaned, resting his chin in the curve of your shoulder while he continued to jettison every drop of his release until he was sure he was empty.
Your hands tightened around his shoulder, as the ripple from Eren’s climax had your cunt tightening around his length, and ecstasy spread over the span of your pelvis and down your thighs. Once he grew limp, he slipped himself out of you, and you felt a slow stream of his cum run down the inside of your thigh.
“I said not to cum in me you fucking idiot.” Your legs were sweaty, making it easier for you to twist yourself out of Eren’s hold until you were now standing upright, both legs planted unsteadily on the ground.
“I’m sorry, I couldn’t help it.” Eren wrapped his arms around you apologetically, but you shrugged him off, using your elbow to drive him back.
Your eyes scanned the closet with haste, looking for tissue paper you could steal to clean up the mess between your thighs, and Eren must have sensed your aim because he made use of his height, seizing a large roll from the top shelf and unwrapping it before handing it to you.
You grabbed it out of his hands, waiving a statement of gratitude, and ripped away a few plies, crumpling them up into a generous wad. “You owe me eighty dollars.”
Eren’s eyebrows lifted and his face twisted into an incredulous expression while he stuffed himself back into his pants and buttoned them up. “Are you running a prostitution ring?”
“I’m serious. Fifty for the pill and thirty just for dealing with you.” You straightened out your uniform, and watched as Eren did the same, tugging on his collar to smooth out the creases.
“You’re a mean little bitch,” he jeered with a slight playful undertone, and then he looked off to the side in concentration. He turned around, pressing his ear to the door of the supply closet, and then he looked back at you. “I think they’re coming back.”
You hummed.
“I’ll walk out first.”
“Right,” you said unenthusiastically, recalling that no matter how many praises he lavished you with in private, in public you were still his dirty little secret. He vowed to you that he would end his current relationship because it was clear you were growing tired of being his toy, good enough for him to fuck but undeserving of anything else. And after all was said and done, when you two passed each other in the halls, he’d still glance at you with the cordiality of a stranger.
Eren had promised to handle it, yet it was obvious he had no intentions to, and you knew that while you watched him give you a fond smile before slipping out of the supply closet.
#eren smut#eren yeager smut#eren x reader#eren x reader smut#eren yeager x reader#eren yeager x reader smut#aot smut#aot x reader#aot x reader smut#attack on titan smut#attack on titan x reader#attack on titan x reader smut#aot au#eren au#attack on titan au
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𝙁𝘽𝙍𝙊 ; 𝗯𝘂𝗰𝗸𝘆 𝗯𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗲𝘀 [𝟳/𝟭𝟭]
summary┃bucky’s past comes back with a vengeance and you’re determined to get the answers you’ve been searching for.
pairing┃roommate!bucky x f!reader
word count┃2,682 words
warnings┃bucky’s past is revealed, character mentions; [sam wilson, natasha romanoff, tony stark], pet name [kid (platonic), sweets & baby], threats made against bucky + reader, trust-issues, mention of hit-men, brief mention of death, phone sex, praise kink, masturbation, mention of toys, slight angst, soft ending — 18+ ONLY • MINORS DNI
notes┃there is A LOT of plot here but also some filthy goodness and a sprinkle of angst <<3
SERIES MASTERLIST
Ex-wife.
Bucky’s words echoed in your ears as he didn’t dare to look at you.
His ex-wife was threatening you.
And he didn’t think to mention her? Ever?
“Can I please explain?” Bucky croaked finally, voice sounding broken as you shrugged your shoulders — in a state of shock.
That was all he needed before he recounted his previous relationship with the woman who was now sending you threatening emails.
Married young, too young and too fast and it ended up blowing up in their faces.
Well, clearly she hadn’t gotten over it.
“I thought I lost her,” he explains. “I thought that moving halfway across the country would be enough.”
You finally looked up to meet his eyes, glossy, sad and terrified as you sniffled.
“There’s a reason only Tasha calls me James.”
It broke your heart hearing that, the way his head hung low and he nearly winced at the sound of his own goddamn name.
But you didn’t know who to trust anymore.
Bucky always glossed over how he, Sam, and Nat knew each other — telling you that they were old friends that go back.
How far back?
You needed to know, but clearly you weren’t about to get answers from him.
“Buck,” he stopped you, taking a step closer as his eyes begged and pleaded you not to finish your sentence.
“I can’t,” he shook his head, “I need some time.”
You couldn’t bring yourself to say those words that would shatter both of your world’s. But you had no idea what the hell you had gotten yourself into and you needed answers.
And you knew exactly who to go to for them.
“I understand,” Bucky sighed. “I’ll stay at Sam’s for some time, okay?”
You could only nod your head, watching him walk past you and into his door.
Then he shut it, something he never did because his door was always open for you. No matter what you needed and no matter what time of day it was.
It felt...wrong.
But you couldn’t dwell on it, grabbing your keys, phone, and whatever other important things you could think of being you nearly bolted out of the front door.
You plugged your headphones into your phone, hitting shuffle and descending down into the subway.
The entire ride made you anxious, slowly approaching your stop and you were way out of place in this crowd.
People rushed by you in expensive suits and what you could only guess were the infamous red-soled shoes that were worth close to your monthly rent, if not more.
You cringed, thinking of the man you were about to see in his stupidly tall office building that you had to crane your neck at an uncomfortable angle just to get a look at.
The elevator could not have taken longer, tapping your foot impatiently as you rode up to what felt like the heavens before the doors opened to revel smooth wooden doors that reach from the ceiling to the floor.
You were so close, before you were stopped.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry, you can’t be here right now.” A man’s voice stopped you, dressed in a security guard uniform and oh, this was so him.
“I know him,” you said, intent on seeing the man probably sitting behind those large doors.
“I’m sorry, I can’t let you do th—”
“It’s okay, Marv. I know her,” his voice came not from behind the doors, but from the long hallway to your left.
The security guard, Marv, nodded his head as he looked at you once more before retreating back to where he was leaning against one of the walls.
“This is a surprise,” you rolled your eyes, “Tony, please. I don’t wanna hear it.”
He walked over to you, embracing you in a hug, “oh c’mon, I’ve missed you, Kid.”
You shook your head, “I haven’t been a kid in years,” you tried to remind him, but it was Tony, he wasn’t going to listen as he just laughed it off and welcomed you into his office.
It was much different from last time, all new furniture and appliances, but nothing lasted more than a year with Tony.
Tony was an old friend, sort of.
He was an old friend of your father’s, something like an uncle, but also like your older brother.
So just one giant pain in your ass.
“So,” Tony sighed. “What trouble did you get into this time, Kid?”
You told Tony everything.
From being roommates with Bucky to the way he asked you to be his fake girlfriend to Sam’s wedding and all the way to the situation you were in now. Confronted by his ex-wife without any idea of what she was going to do.
Tony had that look on his face. The one where he was going to tell you that you were crazy.
“I don’t know how you manage to get yourself into these situations,” he chuckled, hand clamping over your shoulder as he walked around his desk and typed something into his computer.
“Last name is,” he looked at you. “Barnes.”
He nodded his head, typing away at his computer again before he stopped.
There was a brief moment of silence, Tony hiding behind the computer screen before he stood up and walked back around the desk, “I’m gonna need some time.”
You understood, shaking your head. You were asking Tony to hack into any known database and collect as much data on Bucky as you could. It was wrong, but you just needed to know who you were dealing with.
“Thank you, Tony. I-I really appreciate it.” You weren’t good when it came to...well, the heartfelt side of things but luckily neither was Tony.
“Don’t get sappy on me now, Kid. You know it makes me sick,” he joked playfully, smile on his lips as you stood up to give him a half hug.
“I’ll call you as soon as I know anything.” He promised before you walked out of the too-tall building with far more questions than you came with.
It was a waiting game that you didn’t want to play, but you didn’t have a choice.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
It seemed like your relationship with Bucky was doomed from the start.
Friends to lovers rarely, if ever, works out in anyone’s favour.
The fake dating trope you could handle, pushing your feelings aside to help Bucky win a bet didn’t seem like the worst thing in the world. You had a great time, great fucking sex, and a trip out of it.
Then Steve wouldn’t leave the picture. Going as far as coming to the wedding as Natasha’s boyfriend to spite you not realizing that you and Bucky had gotten married.
Married.
You and Bucky were married. Bonded in a whole other way and now, his ex-wife was out for you and him.
Maybe this was a sign from the universe, a big red fucking flag telling you that it wasn’t worth it and yet...you couldn’t let go.
The apartment felt empty without Bucky, his bedroom left the way it was in the morning with your favourite sweater of his laid out on the covers and a little post-it note on top of it.
You never could really decipher Bucky’s handwriting. It was absolute chicken scratch as you picked it up and managed to make out in case you get cold scribbled onto it.
It was an easy decision to pull it over your head and drown yourself in the scent of Bucky’s cologne as you fiddled with the small gold band you now wore around your neck as a necklace.
You didn’t want anyone other than Bucky. There was no in the world who understood you better. Who knew how to make you laugh when you were having a bad day.
Everything led you right back to Bucky.
So when your phone rang from the other side of the couch, you were secretly hoping it was Bucky.
Instead, Tony’s name flashed and your heart sank into your stomach as you quickly hit answer and held the phone up to your ear.
“You’re not gonna like this, Kid.” Tony’s voice flowed through the speakers as you took a shaky breath in and braced yourself for what Tony was about to tell you.
“He did a damn good job at erasing his history, but you can’t erase all of it,” Tony chuckled as you rolled your eyes, “quit stalling.”
He sighed, “the Howling Commandos was an organization tasked with,” he paused, “tasked with collecting intel and making sure that information never got released to the public.”
This time, it was your turn to fall silent.
“Like, spies?” You asked and Tony hummed, “sort of.”
“They had spies, agents, hit-men.”
No. You shook your head, no.
“James Buchanan Barnes was their highest ranking hit-man. Him, along with Sam Wilson and Natasha Romanova worked as a team. A spy, agent, hit-man trio.”
You had to shake yourself out of spiralling, what you needed was everything Tony could possible tell you.
“Anything on his ex-wife?” You then asked and heard shuffling on the other line, “not much. Mary Barnes, but I doubt that’s her real name, was part of a training initiative the Howling Commandos were testing.”
You bit your lip, at least you had a name, even if it wasn’t her real name.
“By that point it looks like James—”
“Bucky. His name is Bucky.”
Tony cleared his throat after a moment’s silence, “Bucky looks like he had disappeared. Blipped off of the face of the Earth. There’s nothing in his file after 2014.”
That makes sense. Bucky was perhaps the most old-fashioned man you knew, only upgrading from his flip-phone just a few years ago. He barely knew how to unlock it, though.
“Sam and Natasha went on to live normal lives, Kid. I’m sure that’s all Bucky wants.” Tony tries to assure you and you laugh, “you sound like my dad.”
He laughed on the other line, “oh gross.”
“Thanks for everything, Tony.” You said, “you know what number to call in case you’re in trouble.”
With that, you both hung up, tossing your phone away from you to digest everything you’d just been told. You knew you had to talk to Bucky, but you didn’t know when.
━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━
“So you’re tellin’ me,” Sam was confused. “That this is the same Mary that tried to get you killed?”
Bucky rolled his eyes, taking another swing of his beer as he rounded Sam’s kitchen island.
“That’s the one, you know, the undercover agent working for Strucker.” Bucky scowled at the name.
He was angry, beyond angry at the fact that his past was creeping up on him despite how far he had gone to erase it.
“But why now? Why come after you now?” Sam poses the question that even Bucky doesn’t have an answer to. So he just shrugs his shoulders and finishes off his beer.
“Unfinished business.”
They stand in silence for a little while longer, listening to the old ticking clock hanging on the wall before Sam takes a step towards Bucky.
“Whatever you need, you know that Tasha and I are here for you, right?” He whispers and Bucky feels the warmth blooming in his chest as he gives him a half-smile.
“Yeah,” he nods his head, “thanks, man.”
Sam knows that Bucky was never really good at the sappy shit, so he doesn’t force it. Instead, he offers him another beer, bottle necks clinking as Bucky’s thoughts race.
He was worried.
Not about himself, but about you.
And you were worried about Bucky, curling up in his bed as you sighed and tossed and turned. There was no way you’d be able to fall asleep alone tonight. And hugging his pillow just wasn’t enough.
So you grabbed your phone, hitting his name and waiting for the ringing to sound before he picked up — tired and groggy.
“We need to talk.” You didn’t give him a chance to greet you. He sighed on the other line, but hummed in agreement, “tomorrow?”
You hummed in response to his question, the sound of his voice soothing as you played with the sheets of his bed.
“I miss you, Sweets.” Bucky whispered, your breathing hitching at how low and raspy his voice really was.
“I miss you too, Bucky.” You admitted, shifting as you got comfortable on the pile of pillows against your head.
There was a moment of silence before Bucky spoke again.
“You know what ‘m really missin’ right now?” His words sent a shiver down your spine as you shakily inhaled, “what?”
Bucky sighed, reminiscent of how he sighs when he runs his hands all over your body.
“I miss that sweet cunt of yours.” Bucky purrs, you know he’s smirking, possibly even dragging his tongue across his bottom lip as he closes his eyes to imagine you under him.
You’re at a loss for words, feeling your panties grow damp, core aching and you’re going to have to touch yourself soon. But that’s all part of Bucky’s plan, you think.
“Here I am, all alone, with my hand wrapped ‘round my cock,” he whispers, but you can hear him stroking himself.
“And all I can think ‘bout is that way your tight little pussy grips me and milks my fuckin’ dick, baby.” Bucky was always so good with his words, knowing exactly what to say to make you melt.
And it was working, because you were a squirming mess in his bed.
“Well,” you could tell he was smirking by his tone, “what’re ya waitin’ for, Sweets. Go on, touch yourself. I wanna hear you work your clit.”
Your hand flew under your panties, being given the permission only made it sweeter as your fingers came in contact with your soaking folds. The sensitive bundle of nerves needed desperate attention as you slowly circled it.
“Good girl, that’s my girl.” Bucky praised, continuing to work himself.
“God,” he hissed, “can’t wait to have you all to myself again. Bury myself deep, maybe even have you sit on my cock as you beg me to do somethin’.”
You worked yourself a little faster, applying some more pressure as you let out a whine at his words.
“Add two fingers, Sweets. I know how much you love bein’ stretched,” Bucky chuckled deeply, “been thinkin’ of gettin’ you a mould of my fuckin’ dick for when ‘m not home.”
Oh my God. Oh my God that shouldn’t be so fucking hot so why does it make your walls flutter and breathing uneven as you have to stop yourself from actually fucking cumming.
He chuckles again, “yeah, you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
You can’t verbally respond, too focused on the tight coil in your abdomen that’s ready to snap.
“I know you’re close, can hear it in how fuckin’ desperate you sound,” he pants, “so why don’t you make a mess all over my clean sheets.”
You gasp, how did he know, but you don’t get to dwell on it for much longer than a moment because your orgasm rips through you and leaves you panting Bucky’s name.
Both of your breaths are uneven and ragged through the phone’s speakers, bed springs creaking on Bucky’s side as he hums.
“If only you could see the miss I made for you, Sweets,” you shuddered at his words, closing your eyes to relish in the moment.
“Now get some sleep, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.” His tone has changed, entirely sweet and caring as you grab the phone to bring him closer to you.
“Okay,” you reply, another lick of silence before you hear Bucky going to end the call but you stop him.
“I love you, Bucky.” You quickly blubber out and it feels good to finally say those words because there’s no more denying how you really feel about him.
“I love you too, Sweets.”
It’s a bittersweet ending to the phone call, thoughts and emotions running wild as you’re forced to remind yourself that Bucky has a lot of explaining to do.
#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x reader smut#bucky barnes headcanon#bucky barnes headcanons#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes oneshots#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes au#roommate!bucky#bucky barnes series
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The Devil’s Own.
Jungkook x OC
Mafia Au!
Warnings : Non-Con ! Manipulation, Degradation, Shitty hero with no redeeming Qualities you have been warned. ( i mean he does get better but not much.)
Summary : Just Mob Boss Jungkook doing mob boss things.
Chapter 1
“ Sign it. ”
I glared at him, feeling sick at the tone. The entitlement.
“No.” I said sharply and I could feel his anger swelling, morphing into something dangerous and deadly but I couldn’t care anymore. I was tired. Exhausted. This cat and mouse game had gone on , long enough. It wasn’t an even playing field, in any sense of the qword.
If today was the day I died, so be it. I would accept it. I would even welcome it.
I was done.
He had everything : an empire at his beck and call , enough money to pave the streets of Seoul in gold and an army of loyal associates behind him. His face was plastered on Billboards across the country , the President posted pictures of him on his fucking SNS and delegates from other countries had to wait weeks , just to get an appointment with the youngest billionaire South Korea had ever seen.
And yet none of those white collared dignitaries saw this side of him. The dirty, violent ruthless man who had more blood on his hands than anyone else in the country. My father’s. My brothers’.
Jeon Jungkook was both the most revered business man in the country and the undisputed king of Seoul’s criminal underbelly.
“You defiance only makes me want to break you in other ways Elena.” He said warningly and I felt my throat go dry. I stared at him, wondering how someone could look so expensively gorgeous and yet, like a hardened criminal.
The expensive silk shirt, the fitted slacks and the handmade shoes ought to clash with the dark ink that covered his entire arm and neck, the piercing on his eyebrow and the glint of metal on his tongue but it didn’t.
It just all came together to make him the most attractive man in existence.
I took a deep breath. Perhaps begging was the way to go?
“ You have my father’s company. You have my brother’s Hospital and you have the family mansion. It’s all yours. This bakery belongs to my mother. It’s all I have left of her. My sister in law is pregnant , due any day. She needs a place to stay and I don’t… I don’t have money to rent anywhere else.” I said desperately, thinking of the paltry wage I earned waiting tables. I could barely afford food for myself let alone for Jisoo and the baby on the way.
The bakery was abandoned but it had a roof. The furniture was crumbling but I could fix that. If I didn’t have to worry about rent, I could save up enough to make it livable. At least till I got a better job.
“I’ve offered you solutions for all of that.” He reminded me softly, eyes trained unblinkingly on me and I stared at him.
“I’m not going to be your whore.” I felt my voice shake.
He grimaced.
“You aren’t qualified to be my whore. And I don’t need one either. Whores are not my thing. I have a beautiful fiancée, don’t you remember? ” He grinned. I felt my heart ache because that fiancée was once my best friend. The only person I had trusted with my entire life. Lisa had betrayed my trust, had spied on my father’s operations and brought him down and I had the horrible, horrible inkling that she had also had something to do with my father and brother’s untimely death in a car crash.
But I couldn’t think about that. Every time I thought about her my heart broke and head spun, and I had to be at my maximum mental capacity if I was going to deal with her heartless fiancée.
“ If you ask me, you’re not fit for anything more than a back alley blowjob for a couple bucks. But Hoseok thinks you have potential. Join his agency, there are a lot of very wealthy men who have a bone to pick with your father. He made a shit ton of enemies. Most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of you. ”
His words felt like worms crawling all over my skin and I could feel the nausea churn inside me.
“I’m not signing the bakery over. You can call the creditors. I still have another year and half to pay the one remaining loan and they won’t come for me till then.” I felt my head begin to throb and Jungkook sighed.
“Suit yourself.” He stood up and I stayed still, watching his tall frame tower over me with ease. He gave me a small bitter smile. It was fraught with hatred and I stared back at him, knowing the emotion was probably mirrored in my gaze.
“Beautiful Elena. As pretty as the day you left me at the altar.” He smirked and I flushed.
“Your vengeance is petty and pointless and unfair…just like you.” I said angrily, frustration building u at his words. The way he talked about our broken engagement like it even mattered. It hadn’t even been real. We had hardly spoken and my father had called the wedding off at the last moment. But apparently, that had been the last straw for the Jeons. They had come after my father’s entire existence with a single minded intent to destroy him and they had succeeded. The man was dead . His two sons were dead.
But apparently it wasn’t enough.
Jungkook stared at me, slipping his hands into his pockets.
“Maybe. But it’s also deadly and potent. And it won’t rest until I see you reduced to nothing but a whore on the streets, spreading your legs for every man who can afford you.” He laughed. “ Saying no is a luxury , one that you’ll soon be unable to afford.”
I refused to be cowed, refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing that his words scared me. Because they did.
They scared me so damn much.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“This bed is so lumpy… I’m so sorry, unnie..” I said apologetically but Jisoo shook her head quickly, palms cupping my face as I held her elbows, gently lowering her to the bed. I stared at her feet, feeling my heart race at how swollen they looked. That can’t be normal, a voice whispered and
I didn’t know if that was normal and I had no money to take her to a clinic. The social center we usually went to only allowed three visits per month and we had used it all up. I wanted to throw caution to the wind and spend the thirty thousand won it would take but that would mean no groceries for a week and surely bread and eggs wouldn’t stretch that long, even if I could sneak meals in the restaurant for myself.
“I’ve been feeling a little dizzy…I’ll just sleep.” She said tiredly. She was thirty six weeks along, not due for another four weeks but her blood pressure was erratic. Her lab numbers were oscillating and there had been talks of an emergency c section. Even with insurance it was way more than I could afford but I had my own jewelry, a few expensive trinkets from my teenage years. I’d been obsessed with diamonds and my father had indulged me and I had a pair of earrings left. I’d already sold the rest but this would take care of the medical bills for the birth itself.
“My shift starts in ten minutes. I have to go. Give me a call if you need anything…” I said softly and I saw the familiar blank and listless look come into her eyes. I knew she was depressed, dealing with grief and pregnancy and loss but there was nothing I could do for her. Nothing. I had applied for a bunch of other jobs but they never wrote back. It wasn’t easy, being rejected over and over again but it wasn’t like there was much else I could do. And the truth was I was resigned to this, accepted that at some point I would have to take more loans and be stuck in an endless cycle of debt for the rest of my life.
And I had made peace with that.
There was no future for me. And I was okay with just surviving.
If only Jungkook would let me.
Apparently, watching me wipe down greasy tables and mop up floors and toilets trying to earn just enough to get a few square meals didn’t soothe his anger. It only fueled it. Jungkook couldn’t fathom that it had been six whole months of me on the streets of Seoul and I wasn’t completely destitute yet. I’d kept myself and my sister in law alive, safe and it pissed him off.
He wanted to see me broken and on my knees, begging him for help. The idea of me somehow surviving despite him taking everything away from me, it just didn’t sit well with him.
I couldn’t afford to have him as an enemy so all I could really hope was that one day he would wake up and give up. One day he would just wake up and decide that I wasn’t worth it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When I walked into my shift and noticed a familiar pair of high heeled Louboutins , completely out of place in my seedy place of employment, I knew I was in trouble. Lisa sat against one of the booths and her gaze was fixated on the door which meant she was waiting for someone. And when her eyes narrowed at the sight of me, I just knew I was the someone.
She wants to get me fired.
It wasn’t rocket science and I felt the urge to turn right back around and leave. But I tamped down on it. I could get through this. I would get through this. Lisa and Jungkook got off on invoking reactions and I wouldn’t give them that.
Except it wasn’t that easy.
It was a nightmare, watching her demand and reject and walk all over me but the sleeplessness from the past few days made spacing out easier and I just stared away at the wall as she yelled and complained and made a scene.
“You’ve stopped fighting? Finally giving up? Good…” She hissed when the manager apologized to her and told me to meet him after my shift and I felt myself tremble in indignation.
“I won’t fight you or Jungkook, you and I both know I can’t afford to.” I said quietly and she went still, something flashing in her eyes for a second. It was gone before I could fully process it but it had been there. Guilt.
Lisa wasn’t a terrible human. She had been a dear friend. We had grown up together and she had even hugged and teased me when I’d been betrothed to Jungkook, all those years ago. I had been twenty back then, naïve and spoiled. While Jungkook had taken my father’s entire legacy apart, piece by piece, Lisa had been nothing more than a pawn. I remembered all the times I had let her home, how she would disappear for lengths of time.
Planting bugs all over the house. All over his office. Jungkook had been smart. Someone like Lisa, so fascinated by thr wealth she had grown up around would naturally jump at the idea of more. It wasn’t greed. It was human nature. And with her help he had destroyed everything my father had built over decades.
I shuddered. My father hadn’t been a good man. He had been greedy, yes. But he hadn’t deserved to die. And Jungkook would have to pay for that sin, someday.
“There’s a job waiting for you in Hoseok’s club.” She smiled cruelly , “ you don’t need this one.”
“The fact that you want to take it away from me, tells me that maybe there’s nothing left in you save.” I said blankly and she turned her nose up at me.
“I have Jungkook. I don’t need to be saved.”
I shook my head. She was so naïve. Men like Jungkook cared for nothing but themselves. But I wondered if women like her didn’t care for anything but the money that came with being his. Money was precious, I thought bitterly. I’d never realized how privileged I had been until I’d had it all ripped away.
“He’s the one you need saving from. And one day you’ll realize that.” I shrugged, not in the mood to offer her anymore life advice. If she was alright with being a trophy wife in exchange for a few pretty shoes that was her prerogative.
Before she could reply, my phone rang.
“Hello?” I asked nervously and I felt my heart drop to my knees when I heard who it was.
I turned on my heel rushing inside and my manager gave me a look of surprise.
“ My sister..she’s… she’s sick. I need to go.” I said desperately and his eyes narrowed. It was the worst timing. He was already annoyed because of Lisa and I stared in disbelief as he quickly shook his head.
“No. I’m sorry Elena…I just can’t let you leave like that…” He said sharply.
It was so unfair.
“I haven’t taken a single day off in five months…” I said desperately..” Please, she’s pregnant..She needs me, she-“
“If you leave, you won’t have a job to come back to. I can’t do this.. First you make trouble with a customer and now you just want to walk out in the middle of your shift without any notice…”
“Fine. Fire me.” I snapped, because I’d just had enough of it. I was exhausted, and tomorrow I’d go knocking on some other tore and I’d get a job. I lived in Seoul …How hard could it be? For now, I had to get to Jisoo. I had to get the hospital and things would be okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It wasn’t okay.
“I… You want to keep her in? So soon?”
“Her blood pressure is through the roof. There are signs of severe pre eclampsia and we want to get her started on a magnesium drip. Steroids to help the baby’s lungs incase we need to deliver…”
“Deliver..?” I couldn’t breathe.
“Yes, I’m sorry…. If her blood pressure doesn’t come down we’re going to have to deliver.”
I nodded, glancing at the bed where Jisoo was sleeping, her face swollen and I knew that she was sick. Really sick. She looked pallid and ill.
“Is she going to be okay?” I asked hoarsely.
“We’re going to do what we can… But I’m going to be honest, we’re looking at a c section, a lot of meds and also some time in the NICU for the baby…. Can you afford it? Your sister’s insurance only covers 80% .”
I blinked, completely thrown. White noise rushed through my ears, a dull throb settling right at the base of my skull and beginning to spread all the way to my arms and back. It was panic mixed wth anxiety mixed with despair and I couldn’t quite cope. The earrings wouldn’t cover all that.
“Oh… Oh..yeah.” I said dully, “ Of course I can… Let me just…. Can I have a moment? There’s somethings I need to do.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I carefully slipped the cash into the envelope, swallowing as I sat on the pavement. I’d got another call from the hospital, they had administered the steroids but Jisoo’s condition seemed to be worsening. They wanted to try inducing labour soon but they wanted me to pay for the room and for the medicines, and apparently, the earrings weren’t as valuable as I thought they were.
I fought nausea wrapping arms around myself as I stared at the cars whizzing by, the putrid city air clogging my lungs as I tried to come to terms with what was happening. Jisoo needed help. She was the only one left and she carried my brother’s son. I felt my throat clog when I thought of Daehwan. He had been a good guy. I had loved him. It wasn’t fair, what Jungkook had done to my family, I thought miserably .
And the only reason I wasn’t driven by vengeance or anger was because I was nothing like Jungkook. I hated him. I didn’t want him to live in my head, didn’t want to waste any part of myself on him , not even my anger. But it was hard when he wouldn’t let me breathe, always at my heels like a wolf : jaws snapping and blood thirsty eyes trained on me at all times. I couldn’t fathom his obsession sometimes. Surely, his hatred was uncalled for now? He’d taken everything from me anyway.
There was a dull roaring in my ears, one that said that this was not really a surprise. I’d thought about it way too often, had considered it countless times. Had even spent one absolutely horrifying evening scouring the streets of Seoul’s red light district just to see how sex workers behaved.
I’d also realized that in the face of desperation, dignity didn’t hold much value.
You are going to pay your debts on your back and on your knees.
The first time Jungkook had thrown it at my face, eyes glinting with glee, my stomach had rebelled so hard. I’d been absolutely infuriated, had thrown a vase at him. And it had been awful, watching him catch it out of the air with ease, his mocking laughter making my bones rattle as he shook his head, “ That’s how this ends, Elena. Mark my words.”
And it was pitiful , that he went through life so consumed with hatred and vindictive cruelty that he couldn’t leave me alone . He was pathetic. That’s how I saw him. A pathetic child who refused to stop tormenting the helpless ant on the floor although it was no match for his cruelty.
At some point Jungkook was going to win. And his idea of winning was seeing me stripped bare of the one thing that kept me alive : my freedom.
It had just happened sooner than I’d thought.
Because I knew what it would mean, to go to Hoseok. He would own me. Hoseok’s whores were all slaves, tangled in his web so badly that there was no hope of escape. He wasn’t cruel but he was smart. No one left the his ‘ agency’ once they went in. I would be lost, forever. And I couldn’t stomach it.
I stared at my knees, fists clenched on the fabric of my skirt. I grabbed my phone, scrolling through the contacts. I considered it carefully. I had to do this on my terms. Had to make sure I retained some sort of control here.
And I knew just how to do it.
Hoseok picked up on the third ring.
“Hello.”
“I need help.” I croaked out.
The deep chuckle made my skin crawl.
“Elena Gong. What a wonderful, wonderful surprise. What can I do you for?” He drawled.
“Well sweetheart, I’m all out of charity so you’re going to have to make it worth my while.”
I took a deep breath.
“I’m a virgin.” I whispered.
The line went completely silent.
“What?” The amusement in his voice died.
“You heard me and I’ll let you cash in on it. I’ll let you auction it off…” I tamped down on the burning protest in my lung, the screaming inside my head that said it was horrifying, that I was considering this. “ But only if you keep my terms.”
“What makes you think you have a say in that.” He said sharply and I laughed.
“I belong to your world, Hoseok. Did you forget that we were friends, once.” I whispered and he didn’t reply.
Laughter, kindness, a big brother I could always count on, hobi oppa, nine year old me with my fingers curled around his wrist as we ran all around the gardens , a smile so wide that he could spread sunshine on the gloomiest days. Different from Jungkook and Namjoon and Yoongi and the others. Willing to include a ‘ girl’ in his playtime. Lisa and I the only girls, not even fazed watching as the rest of them wielded toy guns and mock interrogation scenes, pretending to kill and maim and torture because that was the world we were born into.
“We’re not friends, Elena. Let’s get that straight. The only part of you that holds any value to me is th part between your legs. So tell me, what do you want.”
“When was the last time you auctioned off someone’s virginity? You know how much money you can make off something like that. Not just from the sale itself but from the entire night. Your club… Your gaming hell…. All of it.”
“You expect me to believe you’re a virgin. At twenty seven.” He scoffed.
“Put the word out, everywhere. If you find one man who says he’s slept with me , I’ll back off.”
“That would require me to tarnish your family name. And you’re alright with that?”
I smiled biotterly.
“Isn’t that what you and your precious Jungkookie want? To see the last living Gong, be labeled as a whore and a slut.”
He didn’t reply.
“I’ll give you that. You can do it… You know that will only interest more people. As Jungkook so eloquently put it, most of them would love to fuck the defiance out of me.”
“What’s the catch. What do you want. ”
“2 billion won.” I said firmly “It will be one night. One night only and I want enough money to pay off every one of my father’s debts, to get me an apartment for my sister in law and to support her and her baby for a year at least.”
“Done.” He said without missing a beat and I went still. What must it be like, to throw around money like that without a care in the world. And it sickened me that Jungkook was probably ten times as rich as Hoseok , the money my father owed him and his associates not even pocket change in comparison to his gargantuan wealth and yet, he stayed on my heels, snapping his jaws like a dog with a bone.
“And Jungkook doesn’t get to watch.” I said softly, knowing exactly what Jungkook would get off on.
That made Hoseok laugh.
“You know him too well. I keep forgetting he was madly in love with you once.”
I resisted the urge to vomit. Jungkook didn’t know love. He knew ownership. He didn’t love me, he thought he owned me. That I was his to play with…. For the rest of his life. And when my father had denied him that, just like a toddler in a toy store being denied a shiny toy to break and trample on, he had thrown a temper tantrum.
Except his tantrums always ended in death and destruction.
“That’s the deal. He doesn’t turn up there to gloat.”
“He’s heading out to Switzerland for a week , two days from now.” Hoseok said evenly.
“Good then. My sister in law…she “ I swallowed. “ She’s in a hospital in Yongsan. I’ll send you the address.”
“I’ll take care of it. But I want you here tonight. I’m not going to drop a couple billion won on your head without making sure I’m getting my money’s worth. And I can’t have you changing your mind and bolting either. My reputation is on the line here. If I put out the word that I’m serving something so fucking delicious and then back out, they’re not going to want to buy Hobi’s wares anymore. You understand what I’m saying darling?” Hoseok drawled and I knew exactly what he was saying. If I agreed to this, it was blanket consent for him to whatever he wanted.
“I won’t back out. I can’t. But this is one night. One night with whichever bastard you choose and that’s it. I want out. I don’t want you or Jungkook hounding me again. Ever.” My voice shook as I dug my fingers into my knees.
“My men will be there in ten minutes. Sit tight, princess.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I stared at Hoseok as he carefully poured me a finger of whiskey, neat. He gave me a smirk and I shrugged.
“you remember.” I said casually, throat itching because it had been way too long since I’d had quality alcohol. I missed the burn, the warmth , the numbness that followed.
“Of course I do. You could drink all of us under the table with little effort. It was spectacular.” He laughed and I leaned back against the couch, letting my head fall back.
“I was half certain that you would have a doctor around to make sure I’m a virgin.” I stared at him and he shrugged. “ Pointless. You’re twenty seven, you’ve probably had stuff up there anyway… Not like your hymen’s still going to be intact.”
I thought it was rather horrifying, that I didn’t feel nearly as mortified as I should. This was how Hoseok talked, matter of fact and open and that was why he was so popular. Anytime an important person came into the country, Hobi was the one who offered entertainment for the night. Hobi’s girls were always the prettiest, most well behaved and perfect. They were educated, knew what they were talking about and he didn’t force them into the life. They loved it, enjoyed it and it showed.
Not to say he was a saint.
Far from it.
Hoseok knew how to dine with kings in castles but also how to wrestle with swine in the gutter. The seedy brothels in Seoul’s back alleys were his as well, and he ruled his kingdom with an iron hand. The prostitutes there feared him, one look or word enough to silence any rebellion, any thought of escape.
He was called Hope. And yet somehow that was exactly what he denied the women under him. There was no hope here. There was only lust and power and money. You came to Hobi…. You never left .
I took the glass he offered, taking a small sip, savoring the taste.
“But you believe me. I wonder why.” I watched him closely and he scoffed.
“Between your father and Jungkook, no one ever really had the pluck to come anywhere near you did they?”
Undisputable.
I sighed, leaning back to stare at him.
“Do you think dying hurts?” I asked softly.
It was frightening, how his entire body went stiff, eyes wide and jaw dropping.
“Elena, what the fuck-“
“Its just a question. You’ve killed people. You’ve watched them die… how do you think they feel?” I asked , curious.
“None of them wanted to die. If that’s what you’re asking.” The look in his eyes made me nervous.
I stared at him and the question was obvious. None of them wanted to die, but do you?
I didn’t.
“I’m not thinking of killing myself , oppa. Stop looking so horrified.” I laughed. He shook his head.
“ Don’t joke about that. It’s not fucking funny.”
I sobered up, remembering with a jolt. Ah, of course.
“I’m sorry. I forgot.” I said quietly.
Hoseok’s little sister had killed herself when I was seventeen. She was a year older than me and her father had lost her in a wager to a seventy year old man, known for torturing his bedmates. She had heard the news, taken a deep breath and taken a deep dive off the seventeeth floor of the condo where she lived with her mother.
I’d been engaged to Jungkook by then. And I had almost wanted it. Jungkook wasn’t old at least… twenty one to my seventeen.
“Just so you know, he’s going to find out. And he’s not going to like it.”
I shrugged. Three years is a long time to be preyed upon and now my mind was resigned to a life of being hunted. Hoseok was right. Jungkook would find out and he wouldn’t like it.
Good.
“I don’t care what he does anymore. All I care is that Jisoo and the baby are left out of whatever plans he has…. If you promise me you’ll keep them safe , I’ll cooperate.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a baby boy.
I stared, fingers itching to hold the baby but it was impossible, the little one whisked away to the NICU right after with respiratory distress and Jisoo had gone into a seizure, eyes rolling back into her eyes.
She as alright now, resting in a VIP room with the best care money could buy. Hoseok had asked me if I was happy with the arrangements, and if I would name the boy after him.
I stared at the room, large and breezy and filled with flowers and gifts, toys and baby stuff and I knew right then that I had sealed my fate. I was going to have to go through with this. I could imagine how much Jisoo would protest when she came to her senses. The only relief was that it would take her a few days to be good enough to fight or protest. But then this would all be over and done with.
Jungkook would leave this afternoon. His flight was at three.
I would reach the club at five. The patrons would arrive at seven.
One night, I reminded myself , staring at the gentle rise and fall of Jisoo’s chest as she slept, my fingers playing with the soft skin on her wrist. The IV line went through her veins and I watched the gentle drip of it.
One night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I didn’t know how auctions happened and while I’d been prepared for the worst kind of humiliation, Hoseok assured me that he wasn’t going to make me stand naked on some podium or something.
“Generally, I would do something like that simply for the flair of it but consider this a favor ….a respite because you were, as you said, once a friend.” He gave me an even smile and I could only nod in mute relief.
I was grateful. Beyond grateful.
And what was more, he hadn’t told anyone, who I was.
That stunned me. Because wasn’t that the selling point? The murderous, greedy mob rat Gong Hyo Suk’s only daughter forced to spread her legs for one lucky stranger? If Hoseok had cashed in on that he would have made a fortune. But he hadn’t. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. Would , whoever it was be upset if he recognized me?
I was led to a bedroom, large and tastefully decorated with silky satin sheets and dark curtains and dim lighting that lit up parts of the room and left other parts plunged in darkness. Hoseok had told me to wear whatever I wanted and I realized with a pang that he really didn’t see this as some sort of transaction. He was trying to make it as easy as possible without making any decisions for me. Offering me choices and options and some illusion of being in control.
I didn’t have anything fancy so it was just a dress shirt that I borrowed from Hoseok. I’d left the underwear off, eager to merely get the whole thing over with. I felt a sudden overwhelming urge to laugh out loud.
If Jungkook were here he really would have lost his damn mind, simply because of how little this whole thing affected me. And that was it, really. He was always desperate for a reaction.
Earlier when this whole thing had started, I’d obliged him with that. I would scream, rant and yell….launch myself at him like a wildcat, scratching at him , fists flying and it was obscene, how much he seemed to enjoy that. He would press me up against walls and tables , fingers choking the breath out of my lung, just so he could see me struggle and push back.
He fed off from every negative reaction I offered him and it had taken me a long long time that the way to beat him was to become passive, unresponsive. I would go limp in his arms, stare at him blankly as he tried to manhandle me and that…that had pissed him off. Because that meant I wasn’t playing his game anymore.
If the prey wasn’t playing, the game wasn’t fun anymore. It was drab.
Boring.
And I knew that Jungkook kept raising the stakes, kept tightening the noose around my neck….just to bring that girl out again. The one that had wanted to put up a fight . The one that wanted to mouth off even with the muzzle of a gun pressed against her head. The one who would spit in his face in front of all his associates, even if it earned her a vicious strike of his hand across her face.
I shuddered. They weren’t memories I liked reliving.
Well, if that was who he wanted, I’d make sure he would never see her again.
The door opening made me jump and Hoseok came in , with a wide grin on his face.
“Baby…. Your guest for the night.” He said softly and I peered over his shoulders, my heart and mind grinding to a halt when I caught sight of what had to be the most breathtakingly beautiful man on the face of the planet.
I felt my heart begin to pound, fear taking over because this wasn’t okay. Not really. I was okay with old, creepy and disgusting , not able to get it up for more than ten minutes.
I wasn’t okay with someone who looked like they stepped right out of the latest issue of GQ.
Hoseok left quickly, closing the door behind him and the man stepped into the light, the brightness lighting up his perfect features even more. I felt my throat go dry, and fought the urge to get up and run. Growing up as the daughter of a mobster , I’d learned how to trust my instincts over appearances.
And right now, every single one of those instincts screamed at me that this man was absolutely dangerous.
“Well, you are beautiful. I’ll give you that. “ He said casually.
“Thank you.” I said stiltedly, watching as he tugged on his tie, pulling it off his neck deftly . Instead of tossing it aside , he wrapped it a bunch of times around his wrist over and over as he smiled at me.
“Don’t thank me yet. The only reason I like beautiful things is because of how easily they break.” He smiled. “ I haven’t been with a virgin in a while…. I miss the screams.”
And there it was the full blown panic that came with stark terror. I crawled back on the bed, staring as he moved closer and there was no mistaking the look on his face, the harsh grip of his hand on my ankle telling me that I was going to regret every one of the choices that led me here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Hoseok wasn’t at the airport.” Jungkook observed casually, glancing at Yoongi as the latter finished cleaning his gun carefully, eyes fixed on his weapon with utmost concentration.
“He’s holding some sort of auction tonight. Some chick …” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook hummed. It was not the kind of thing he was interested in. Anonymous bids were often boring : actresses or female idols past their prime, desperate to make some money to survive. He had no interest in those but he was a little peeved that Hoseok hadn’t told him anything about it.
Hoseok was one of Jungkook’s most trusted friends. He was almost as powerfully rich as Jungkook and the only reason Jungkook reigned supreme was because Hoseok had no interest in challenging him for the throne. Hoseok was dangerous and cunning and loyal and Jungkook was grateful to have him on his side and he had hoped to see him before leaving. Just to ask him to keep an eye on Elena.
He grimaced, hating himself.
God, he couldn’t go two hours without thinking of her. It fucked with his head, the amount of space she took up inside him. Jungkook , for all his wealth and power, was driven solely by his need to prove himself. He wanted to be powerful and terrifying yes, but more than that , he wanted people to know.
He wanted people to look him in the eye and acknowledge him for what he was : the most dangerous man in the country. He liked seeing that fear, that worship, that admiration. He got off on it. He wanted it , craved it and for some reason he craved it more from her , than anyone else.
And instead of giving him what he wanted, instead of begging on her knees for mercy, instead of licking his shoes and begging for him to let her live….she ignored him. She looked at him with defiance and pride, her chin straight and her back unbending, her gaze locked right on him like she was his fucking equal….
And Jungkook, he’d taken a lot of insults. Taken more than his fair share of hits in life …..
But when she looked at him like that , like he was something stuck to the bottom of her shoe….
Fuck it drove him wild with fury.
It made him want to teach her a fucking lesson, to remind her that he owned her because he owned everything. To break her down, snuff out the flames of defiance that burned so bright in those ember eyes… Take her into his bed and brand her with his body. Till she was on the floor, on her knees covered in his spit and cum begging for mercy….
Because no one looked at Jeon Jungkook like that and lived to tell the tale..
“Seokjin’s here. Landed in Korea a couple of hours ago. ” Yoongi said casually and Jungkook smiled a bit at that. He loved his older brother, technically a step brother and growing up he had only saw him when he visited his mother in China. That meant a couple of months a year and now as adults, a bit more often because Seokjin loved Jungkook and liked to visit him often.
Seokjin was a celebrity trainer, working with actors and athletes and he did a good amount of modeling as well. He was rich, handsome and well liked and the only thing that gave away the Jeon blood in him was the fact that he was a sexual sadist.
The face of an angel with a devilish streak, he had a penchant for sadism and inflicting pain on his partners and while Jungkook didn’t particularly enjoy indulging him, he knew there were women who were into that and usually had them arranged for when Seokjin dropped by in Korea. His hyung’s visit seldom lasted more than a few weeks at a time and it was a pity that he would miss out one whole week of it .
But the issue in Switzerland was a little pressing and Jungkook had to be there in person to sort it out.
He leaned back against the seat, staring out of the window, sighing.
“An unsullied dove ….What the fuck is this shit..” Yoongi muttered and Jungkook turned, curious.
“What?”
“Hoseok’s been hyping up some new girl for the auction and Seokjin hyung’s bidding on her.”
Jungkook laughed at that.
“Jungkook…..” Yoongi’s voice is completely stunned, his eyes confused as he looks up at Jungkook.” Its Elena.”
Jungkook’s thought process came to a grinding halt.
There’s a sound between his ears, a dull rushing sound like the wind in a storm and he can’t quite comprehend what he just heard. Even Namjoon who had been buried in his laptop , looked up then, tugging an airpod out of his ear.
“Wait…did you say Elena?” His eyes were wide , lips parted in shock. Yoongi and Namjoon exchanged glances, no doubt bracing themselves for the explosion that was to follow.
Jungkook took a deep breath.
“Turn the fucking plane around.”
That jolted Namjoon out of his stunned stupor..
“Turn-? Jungkook what…. We’re on a fourteen hour flight-“ Namjoon began but the look on Jungkook’s face made him stop.
“DID I FUCKING STUTTER?”
Namjoon swore.
“Fucking hell… alright just calm the fuck down, Jesus…just put a fucking bullet in that girl’s head and spare us all the headache fuck…” He growled, unbuckling his seat belt and rushing to the cockpit and Yoongi groaned.
“ Let me guess you want me to get in touch with someone in Seoul and ask Hoseok to hold off on letting Seokjin near her…”
Jungkook glared at him.
“If you already know that why the fuck are you still here…” He growled and Yoongi gave him a look.
“Just tell her you’re in love with her and let us live, Jeon Jungkook.”
In love….. what the fuck….
He glared at Yoongi’s back, his asinine words making him madder. God he wanted to crush someone’s skull into dust with his bare hands.
And right now, in his head , that skull belonged to Jung fucking Hoseok.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“What just happened?” I asked, frantic staring at the door as Hoseok’s men casually led a fuming Seokjin away while the man himself stared at me, looking pale as parchment.
“ Jungkook found out.” He said shortly and I felt my heart drop although I was half relieved because there had been something insane in Kim Seokjin’s gaze when he’d reached for me , a cruel glint of hunger that told me he would have hurt me really badly if Hoseok hadn’t barged into the room , frantic and worried.
He had given Seokjin a wide smile and then, “ I’m so sorry. We were waiting on her blood results and turns out she has a…. well, certain occupational disease that is very infectious.”
Seokjin’s mouth had dropped open even wider than mine.
“I thought she was a fucking virgin.” He had snapped, and I flinched at how cold and furious he had sounded.
But apparently there was a reason this whole thing had happened.
“What do you mean Jungkook knows? What does that mean?” I asked frantically, fear taking over.
“ He’s heading back here… He wants to see you.”
I felt my entire body go ice cold as I shook my head…
“No…fucking no bring Seokjin back here , he can fuck me that was the fucking deal, Hobi, please don’t../…”
“Elena , I’m so fucking sorry.. Seokjin…he’s fucked in the head…. He likes hurting his whores, likes making them bleed and he would have fucking destroyed you…”
I gaped at him horrified.
“What?!” I hissed shaking my head in disbelief.
“He’s Jungkook’ stepbrother. I’ve arranged whores for him before, I knew he was a little crazy but I’d never seen him before and I didn’t know he was the Kim Seokjin…fuck he outbid everyone and fucker looks like a fucking angel, how the fuck was I supposed to know he’s unhinged? Thankfully, I messaged Yoongi and …. Fuck… Listen… I know I paid for your sister’s surgery but you’re going to have to pay me back….”
I felt my body convulse in rebellion.
“I can’t.. You know I fucking can’t…”
“I can’t make an enemy out of Jungkook…. I can’t.” Hoseok shook his head. “ You can get out of here now if you want but I’d advise you to stay. If you run it’s only going to make Jungkook angrier.”
“WHAT DID I FUCKING DO TO HIM?!!!” I screamed, feeling my composure crumble into smithereens. “WHAT THE FUCK DOES HE WANT FROM ME?!!”
Hoseok flinched, stepping back and holding his hands up.
“Whether I want to or not, I answer to Jungkook. I shouldn’t have done this in the first place , I’m sorry Elena.” He shook his head and stepped back like the coward that he was and I wanted to hurt him. To shake him and ask him to fucking remember who I was. That I had nothing to do with my father’s sins . That I had been a fucking marionette in his hands, had wanted nothing more than to be left alone.
I stared at him in disbelief.
“So much for being a friend…” I whispered.
His jaw tightened. But he didn’t look guilty. None of them ever did. It was like guilt didn’t exist in their world. They did what they wanted to whoever they wanted , whenever they wanted and they got away with it because that bastard’s word was law. What Jeon Jungkook wanted, he got.
“I’ll get your clothes sent in.”
I watched him leave, the door slamming shut behind him and sagged against the bed, staring at myself. What had just happened?
Was I born to endless misery and misfortune?
Couldn’t I catch a fucking break?
I’d agreed to sell myself hadn’t I? Would have even let Seokjin hurt me if that was what he wanted. Because it was one night. It was one night of this…whatever the hell this was and then freedom. That was the deal.
The door opened again and I stared as a young girl brought me a pile of my clothes neatly folded.
“Do you work here?” I said sharply.
She blinked before bowing her head.
“Yes, mistress.”
I scoffed.
“Don’t call me mistress , I’m here to get fucked, just like you. Tell me does Jungkook ever use the women here.” I demanded.
She looked trapped, glancing at the door, clearly wanting to run .
“Tell me.” I snapped and she flinched.
“I..uh..yes. Sometimes.” She said softly.
“Can you tell whoever fucks him next to kick him in the fucking balls?”
The girl bowed deeply and all but ran out and I sighed, feeling myself shaking. Jungkook was on the way here and I wanted to yell and scream and rave at him but I knew that was exactly what he wanted. I wanted to deny him the satisfaction …wanted to act all cool and composed in front of him but it was impossible…
Because I hadn’t realized just how tired I was of this whole thing, till right this moment, when the end had been in sight. I was supposed to get my two billion won pay off all the debt , give Jisoo the rest of the money and disappear. I was so tired, so tired of this life I’d gotten trapped into, slaving over for hours on end just to afford a couple of meals a day. No friends, no boyfriends, no hope of a future …..
The door banged open and I jumped, crawling back when I recognized the man who had just entered.
“Yoongi-“
“Jungkook wants to see you.” He ground out and I swallowed.
“I need to get dressed. Please just wait outside.” I said shakily.
And then the door opened further and a tall looming shadow stepped in familiar and vomit inducing.
Jungkook looked livid, piercing glinting through the dimply lit room and I stared at him. He was dressed in a tight black t shirt, he sleeves stretched thin over his biceps and the tattoos stark against his skin.
“Leave us.” He said softly and Yoongi moved away to the door leaving me alone with the devil himself. I cursed myself for not putting at least my panties on, I was naked underneath this shirt and although it was big it left nothing to the imagination.
Jungkook’s eyes raked over my form before resting on my face.
“You think you’re smart enough to outsmart me, Elena?” He whispered softly.
I swallowed.
“Send you brother back in. He can fuck me and I’ll pay you back.”
Jungkook hummed, stepping closer and grabbing my clothes from the bed, he grabbed the plain white bra and the pastel pink underwear and then to my complete and utter mortification he brought the clothing up to his face, breathing in .
“Fucking pervert!!!” I screamed, feeling the action like a physical touch and wanting to claw his eyes out and the smirk on his face told me that this was exactly what he wanted but I was too fucking gone to care.
“If you want me to be a whore, fine. I’ll be a whore. But on my terms…” I spat out and he shook his head, laughing.
“I don’t just want you to be a whore, Elena. I want everyone to know that you are one…” He dropped my clothes and moved closer, holding a hand out. “ Come here.”
I stared at the inked fingers, adorned with sterling silver rings and bracelets with the motifs of his gang. I shook my head.
“No. I’m not playing this game with you.” I turned my face away.
His hand shot out gripping my upper arm with enough strength to bruise and I screamed, agony shooting up my arm and shoulders as he dragged me off the bed and onto the floor. I landed hard, hips and elbows bruising from impact and I stared at him in disbelief.
“I’ve been to gentle with you. You’ve forgotten your fucking place.” He bent over and grabbed me by my hair, yanking me to my feet so hard that it felt like my scalp had been ripped away from my skull.
“Okay…okay…Okay Jungkook..just…!!” I said softly, flinching because my pain tolerance was almost zero and Jungkook’s grip was so hard that my eyes were beginning to water now. He let me go, grabbing my panties off the floor and tossing them at me.
“I’m going to count to five. Put those on and get out.”
He walked out of the door and I stumbled a little fumbling with the fabric before quickly, slipping my legs in and yanking it up to my waist. I made to put on something else but his voice came, loud and impatient.
“Get the fuck out here.”
I walked out of the door and he was standing there next to Hoseok. I couldn’t meet either of their gazes , hating how they had so much power over my life. I stared at the floor. It was tempting to yell at them and scream but that never led anywhere.
“ I’ve asked them to stop the payment on the Hospital bill. Seeing as Elena hasn’t kept her end of the bargain.”
I felt my breath hitch at that, willing down the tears as I glared at him.
“What do you want?” I snapped. “ Tell me who you want me to fuck…. I’ll do it. Let’s get this over with so you can go back to whatever sewer you fucking climbed out of. ….”
Hoseok’s breath caught like he couldn’t believe what I’d just said and the look in his eye was a warning but I was sick of this. Sick of them all.
Jungkook turned to Hoseok with a laugh.
“You see hyung? See why I can’t let her go? If I let her scot free, everyone’s going to think I’m a pushover….that any worthless bitch can talk to me any way she wants and get away with it….” He shook his head, staring at me with a glint in his eye. “ I’m not going to choose. They are. You think you can charm your way into Hoseok’s heart and get special treatment? You think you’re ready to be a whore, Elena? Let me show you how a real whore gets treated in Hoseok’s club.”
He gripped my wrist, yanking me behind him as he stalked off down the narrow corridor that opened up into the club. I let myself get dragged out into the club dismally aware of the fact that I was wearing nothing but Hoseok’s shirt. I could feel eyes on me but I kept mine on the back of Jungkook’s head as he dragged me all the way to the front. I knew what he was going to do and at this point I was just numb.
There was no point reasoning with the devil.
I glared at him as he pointed at the stage. “ Get up there.” He whispered harshly.
I stared back at him, not moving. I saw Jungkook’s jaw clench.
“Either you go up there by yourself, with your clothes on. Or I carry you up there, after stripping you naked. What’s it going to be? ”
I glared at him, pursing my lips before climbing up using the small stair in the side. I moved to the center, right in front of the stage lights, so the rest of the room would disappear. I had no wish to see any of the bastards in the room.
“I think all of you recognize this little beauty here, don’t you?” Jungkook’s voice was cheerful, friendly even and I bit my lips, fists clenched. “ Well, if you don’t let me tell you . This is Gong Hyo Suk’s daughter. Remember that bastard? He put a hit out on my father. Killed him and my mom on the night I was supposed to be marrying his fucking daughter. A daughter who later called off the wedding, because I was too poor now, to give her the life she deserved. ”
I felt the familiar ice cold guilt in my vein. I was seventeen, I wanted to scream. I was seventeen and all I did was say what my father asked me to say, do what my father asked me to do.
“ That was nine fucking years ago… and you know what I told myself…. I told myself, that a greedy little bitch like this, doesn’t deserve shit.” He laughed. “ If money’s what she values the most, then the only thing she deserves is to be treated like the whore she is.”
“Why don’t you guys tell me, how much money you’d be willing to spend, to fuck her? Come on, Hobi’s been treating you guys so well lets help him make some money tonight… be generous. ”
I could barely hear what they were calling out but when Jungkook climbed onto the stage next to me, I jumped. Moving back instinctively, I winced when brought a forearm around my throat nearly choking me as he dragged up against his body.
“90 million won….That’s a lot.” He grinned. “ Jihan hyung….. that was you right? You’re gonna pay 90 million won for her?”
I felt my heart race, it was a lot. More than enough for the Hospital Bills, would even leave extra to get a decent apartment somewhere... I grabbed his wrist as it pressed into my throat, trying to pull his hand off me but he just wrapped his free hand around my waist, wrapping his entire body around mine and chuckling into my hair.
Jungkook pressed his head against mine and I froze, hating the close contact.
“Okay…but since I’m feeling a bit left out here…Why don’t I pitch in… 500 Won.” Jungkook said loud and clear.
I froze. An eerie silence fell over the club, laughter stilling and the clink of glasses slowing down.
What.
I struggled to get away from his but his hold tightened.
“Anyone else?” He called out. “ Come on… Not even thousand? Surely you think this one here’s worth a thousand won? Aren’t you going to outbid me?”
No one responded of course they didn’t. Jungkook’s anger was palpable and no one was going to get on his wrong side …..
“Ahh… is that it then? Bid’s going to close for 500 won then…. Hear that baby?” He whispered against my ears and I swallowed. “ 90, million won to five hundred won in a few seconds… What does that tell you?”
“It tells me you’re a fucking psychopath in love with your own voice… Get off me.” I hissed.
“No. What it tells you is that only I get to decide how much that body of yours is worth, not you. . You don’t get to go sell your fucking body behind my back for two billion won and then pay off all your debts and ride off into the sunset, that is not how this works….”
I went limp in his arms fighting tears because he never played fair. Never.
“Hear that Hoseok-ah… I win her for the night for 500 won…fair and square…. Is that alright?” He called out into the darkness and I felt the first inkling of dread begin to seep in.
“No.. No… get off me.” I hissed and he laughed, dragging me off the stage with ease. I screamed, kicking out in disbelief.
Jungkook grinned at me, before grabbing both my arms and yanking them behind me, and I whimpered, unable to move as he easily pulled me along to the door that opened into the hallway. Behind us I heard Hoseok’s voice.
“Jungkook, don’t be impulsive. Think about whatever you’re going to do.”
I flinched at that, panic building.
“He’s not going to do anything. I’ll fucking kill him if he touches me , I-“
“Shut the fuck up, you little bitch.” He shook me hard till my teeth rattled and I sobbed out.
“Jungkook…” Hoseok warned but he merely snarled.
“I know what I’m doing hyung, just…. Don’t disturb us. And make sure everyone here knows that she’s open for business.” It was loud enough to carry through the club and I felt humiliation burn my throat, acrid like acid.
I froze in disbelief.
“Jungkook …” Hoseok’s voice held a tone of reproach.
“ And tell them that her body is amazing. Tell them she spent the night with me , the best fuck I’ve ever had , mouth made for cock.”
I stared straight ahead as he pulled me all the way to the room we had left earlier and I tripped when he shoved me inside, landing on my hands and knees . I quickly rolled back around to land on my ass, crawling back as he slammed the door shut and locked it from the inside.
He stared down at me, mouth grim.
“You do owe me a wedding night. I was so ready to fuck your tight cunt, nine years ago… I think I’ve waited long enough yeah.”
I stared at him in disbelief. I knew exactly what he wanted me to do, to yell and scream and protest and fight so he could get off and forcing me…. Fucking psychopath.
I took a deep breath and nodded.
“If you pay for my sister in laws bills, and give me an apartment sure. “ I shrugged. “You’re not any different from any of the bastards here. I don’t give a damn which one of you idiots wants to rut into me like the absolute animal that you are…. I don’t care…” I said softly.
“you don’t? Really? You want me to tell you what your brother said when one of my men put a gun into his mouth…. He begged for his life…said he had a kid on the way….” Jungkook laughed, shaking his head. “I told him it was better than what his father did…. My sister was six months pregnant when his lieutenant gunned her down on the streets.”
I shuddered, wrapping my arms around myself.
“Why are you telling me this…” I snapped.
“Because she didn’t deserve it did she, Elena? She didn’t fucking deserve to die like that , like a dog on the street when she had nothing to do with any of this…. She didn’t deserve it.” He growled, bending down and gripping my chin hard.
“Maybe she did deserve it.” I spat out. “ If I deserve to be here, maybe your sister deserved to die too. “
He snarled, hand flying to my hair and dragging me up off the floor in one sharp yank. I whimpered as he pushed me on the bed, before climbing on top of me. I felt like every bone in my body was about to snap in two, the weight of him unbearable on me.
“I won the bid tonight…. I won it fair and square… You signed the waiver didn’t you…that you agreed to the auction…I won and I’m going to fucking collect.” He growled, and I kicked out, trying to buck him off of my body.
“Get off me.” I hissed. “ I’m not letting you fuck me for 500 won.”
“How about for your Jisoo then?” He whispered and I went still.
“What?”
He chuckled, reaching down and I felt my pulse pound as he pulled his phone out, dialing quickly and turning on the speakers.
Yoongi’s voice made me go ice cold. Everyone knew what Yoongi did for Jungkook.
“Daehwan’s wife is in a hospital room in Yongsan. Hobi’s got the details. I think she’s served her purpose.”
“No!! JUNGKOOK NO!!” I screamed , thrashing so hard my head began to spin but he grunted pressing down into me harder.
“Are you serious? I’m not home yet… I can take care of it tonight.” Yoongi said, voice casual and I sobbed, shaking my head in sheer terror.
“Okay… I’ll behave.. I promise.. please just don’t…”
Jungkook hummed.
“Well, that was easy… Yoongi-yah… why don’t you stay on the phone yeah…. Going to get that wedding night I’m owed and if my baby doesn’t co operate you know what to do, yeah?”
I bit my lips, glaring into the sheets as he gripped my waist, pulling me up.
“Ass up like the bitch that you are, baby.” He whispered and I felt my entire body shudder in disgust. It was worse because I hadn’t done this before. Didn’t know what to expect. But I couldn’t let him know that. If Jungkook knew that I was a virgin, I could just imagine how much fun he’d have with that info.
Hands gripped my wrists, pinning them to the bed and I turned my face away when I felt the press of his lips on my cheeks. He gripped both my wrists with one hand, keeping them pinned over my head and I flinched when I felt his fingers pulling the fabric of my panties aside, just enough for the blunt head of his cock to press against my slit.
“Yoongi, you there?” Jungkook said softly and Yoongi grunted over the phone. I felt my face flame in embarrassment.
“You’re a sick bastard but I’m used to it. What’s up?” he said casually.
“Remember how we used to wonder just how tight Elena’s cunt was… back when we were in school.”
Fucking monster, I thought in disbelief. I hate him I hate him I hate him….
“Good times…” Yoongi chuckled lightly .
Jungkook pushed into me in one hard thrust and pain shot straight up my spine, my insides burning like he’d fucked me with a knife and not his body. I couldn’t stop the cry of agony that got torn of me, my eyes tearing up and tears spilling over onto my cheeks.
“Damn Jungkook, she okay?” Yoongi’s chuckle made me want to claw his face off, and just the urge to kill was growing inside me.
“Well, I can confirm that it is, in fact just as tight as we thought…” He grunted, thrusting into me at a pace that was inhumane, every push and drag of him rubbing my insides raw and I bit down on the sheets under me, afraid that I would do something absolutely humiliating, like beg him to stop.
“Good, you should let me take that tight ass for a ride someday then. With her permission of course…. I’m a gentleman after all. Big on consent.” He laughed and I swallowed the urge to tell him that I would puncture his balls with a switchblade if he came anywhere near me.
“Oh, she’s going to do whatever I ask her to….aren’t you baby…” He grunted, “ Turn around so I can see you.”
He pulled out of me, his weight lifting off my body as he moved away. I couldn’t move, limbs numb and insides throbbing in pain . His palm landed on my thigh, hard and the sharp sting of it made me jump.
“I said turn around, I want to see your face when I fuck you.” Jungkook growled. I stayed limp, breathing hard and he grunted impatient, fingers sinking into my hair , yanking me to my knees and the movement made my legs scream in protest.
“How’s she so quiet? You fucked the voice out of her, kook-ah?” Yoongi asked amused and Jungkook pulled me by the hair, dragging me to the center and pushing me down till my head landed on the pillow.
“Hyung you should see her right now, all fucked out …. Like she’s never had a dick in her before.” He shook his head, “ Fucking slut. Take that off and hold yourself open for me.”
I stared at him, uncomprehending and he grabbed both my hands, placing them on my knees.
“Grab your knees and pull your legs back… So I can fuck that tight cunt the way I want to.” He said slowly, like I was a dog he was trying to train and I stared at him , defiantly.
“ Go to hell.” I whispered.
Yoongi’s laughter came from somewhere to the right.
“Your dirty talk needs work, Kook ah… Tell her she’s a precious little kitten and she makes you feel really good…. Bitches love that shit…”
Jungkook hovered over me, grabbing the back of my thighs and spreading them wide enough to make me whimper in pain.
“Is that so babygirl? You want me to tell you that? That you make daddy’s cock feel good?” He cooed, nudging the tip against me again and I had never hated anyone so much in my life. I stared up at his face, and he smiled at me, a cheeky little grin that made his bunny teeth stand out and for a second he looked so deceptively angelic and the glimmer of his piercing caught my eye.
I couldn’t help but swallow, gaze trained on the glint of metal on his tongue.
“You like that?” He grinned suddenly, sticking his tongue out for me to see, I felt my eyes widen at how sinfully good he looked .” Hyung she likes my tongue piercing.”
“Show her how it feels on her clit.” Yoongi laughed and I could barely fully process what I heard before Jungkook was crawling down my body, arms, curling on my thighs and yanking me onto his tongue .
I felt the press of his tongue on my slit, licking right into me and the jolt of pleasure was so unexpected, the pleasure so unwanted and yet so overwhelming and I couldn’t stop the way my body thrashed against the streets, lips parted as I practically mewled out in pleasure.
“Definitely a kitten…” Yoongi called out and I shuddered as Jungkook slipped two fingers into me , the ice cold press of his ring inside me making me jump. I wanted to pull away, grab his hair and yank him off but I couldn’t because it was
“Next time I’ll put the dick piercing in too, yeah? Fuck you with a bit of metal on my cock so you can feel that up there…. ” He laughed into my thighs and I screamed when he bit into the flesh there , hard.
“I’m getting bored… Either turn on facetime so I can at least jerk off to this , or I’m hanging up…” Yoongi called out .
“Hyung she clenches down on me every time she hears your voice… Just stay on for a few more minutes yeah, she tastes so fucking good, I’m gonna cum soon….” Jungkook added another finger, slipping in deep before spreading them apart inside me. I whimpered when he pushed his tongue in between the wet digits, licking into my walls and I could feel the ball of his piercing drag against my walls, ice cold and hard.
Was it fucked up that I did clench down on him again, my body apparently a slave to my base desires even as my mind screamed that he was the absolute worst bastard on the face of the planet.
“Elena, you owe me a blowjob at least for this…” Yoongi called out and I glared at the phone.
“I’ll bite your fucking dick off if you come anywhere near me.” I snapped.
“Fuck, I could get off just to that mouthy fuckhole of hers…..” Yoongi grunted.
Jungkook pulled away, climbing back up over me and lightly slapping my breasts.
“Now, how about you open that mouth and let me fuck it?”
Yoongi snorted from behind us and Jungkook glared at the phone before glaring at me again.
“Well?”
“You want to know how hard I can bite?” I said sharply, the pleasure ebbing away into nothing and resentment taking it place, the momentarily physicality of the situation fading and the reminder of who he was and who I was entering my sex addled brain.
“No.. You’re right…. But you know what, I’m not feeling it anymore. I was right.. you really aren’t qualified to be my whore. Your body…it’s frigid like a fucking popsicle…such a fucking turn off. ” He reached over and hung up on the phone.
“Now…”he whispered, leaning in closer and I yelped, when his fingers closed over my throat..” Shut your mouth and take what I give you like a grateful bitch.”
I swallowed when he pushed into me again, his pace steady as he fucked into me, eyes closed and I realized that he was almost fully dressed having just unbuttoned himself enough to get his cock out.
When he stiffened, spilling into me his eyes blew open and he locked eyes with me, wide eyed and for one horrible second he looked young and vulnerable and hurt.
I blinked as he pulled out, the sticky warm mess of his cum dripping down my inner thighs and onto the sheets.
“Well, that was much worse than I thought it would be.” He said and I stayed on the bed as he grabbed his phone and buttoned himself back up.
He smirked at me and then reached into his pocket.
I quickly pulled myself together, ignoring the aches and pains and getting to my knees before reaching for my dress on the bed. it was kind of pointless because I still had Hoseok’s shirt on and I wasn’t going to take that off in front of Jungkook.
“Well, I’m a man of my word , Elena so…here you go..just as we discussed.” He tossed a coin on the bed and I stared at the engraved 500 on the shiny surface, feeling my rage swell inside me.
“If you still want to work out a payment plan for your sister’s bills …. Why don’t you come to my office tomorrow?” He tossed his card on the bed before moving away to the door.
Fucking bastard.
Author’s note : My whole life is filled with regrets .
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Goodbyes- Bakugou Katsuki
Bakugou x f!reader (ft. Katsumi, yours and Katsuki’s daughter )
Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Bad Father-Daughter relationship, slight SLIGHT SLIGHT (like 0.00000000000001%) fluff, intense kiss cuz Katsuki’s a SLUT
Summary: Years have passed and even so, Bakugou never gave up on you. You or Katsumi. You were both his family. His girls. He needed the both of you. And he will do everything in his power to bring you both back to him, but his now 16 year old daughter doesn’t plan on making it easy for him.
BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST
Pt.1 Pt.2
11 years have passed since you left Katsuki that day. That horrid day. After leaving the house of hell, you went to Mina’s place to see your daughter. You saw her, happy, with her uncles and aunt. Her world was about to change and so you had to give her every ounce of happiness she could possibly get. You decided it would be best for both of you to stay in the welcoming home a little longer.
While continuing Katsumi’s play date, Mina had suggested you and Katsumi stay with her and Kirishima, but you declined. You knew it would be too easy for Katsuki to find you both and you knew he wouldn’t stop trying if he knew you were both at such easy access. And so, after hours and hours of Katsumi having the time of her life, it was time to bring her to her new home. For the time being at least.
After you left the happy couple’s house, you and Katsumi stayed in a hotel for the time being. It was a very nice place. Plenty of other kids for Katsumi to get along with, luxury rooms, and a pool! You both had stayed there for about a month until you found a gorgeous little house where you and Katsumi could call home. Not only was it spacious, luxurious, and all around amazing, if was far, far away from the previous home your shared with your soon-to-be ex husband.
You both had finally moved in, but that was the least of your problems. Like you told Katsuki, you allowed him to be a part of your daughter’s life. You allowed him to take care of her for 2 weeks, and then it was your turn. 2 weeks would pass and it would be his turn once again. You never allowed Katsuki to know where you both where. You kept your information very hidden and made sure your young daughter wasn’t capable of telling her father the new address whenever she was in his custody. You also never allowed Katsuki to pick Katsumi up. You always dropped her off, but never in a vehicle of your own. Can’t risk having him look up and track down your license plate. And if you couldn’t drop her off, you’d have Kirishima or Mina do it.
As time went on Katsumi continued to ask what was going on. Why was her life suddenly so different? She had asked Katsuki before, but he always told her it was a conversation she should have with her mom. When she asked you, you just smiled at her and told her “Things are changing right now, so it’ll just be me and you for a bit. But a Mommy-Daughter play date sounds fun doesn’t it? And it’ll last for a long time~” you said, hinting at what could possibly be the end of Katsumi and Katsuki’s relationship.
Thankfully, Katsumi liked the sound of that. Even though she was a daddy’s girl, she loved her mommy just as much! Of course her head would constantly be filled with thoughts of Katsuki but what can you do? You can’t bring her back to the cheater. Not permanently at least. You just...can’t.
Katsumi wasn’t the only one who was constantly thinking about family. Katsuki also had his face in every screen, every device, every piece of paper that might be able to help him find you. After you left him, he fell into a deep depression. He lost his two girls and it drove him mad. Even though he got to see Katsumi every 2 weeks, he knew that soon, she’d be old enough to be allowed to know what had happened. He was constantly on the lookout for you and where you could possibly be staying and with his friends refusing to help him, he concluded that for this job, he was on his own. He didn’t care. He had to find you again. He was going to bring his family back together.
—
A few years had passed. 6 to be exact. Katsumi was now 11 and she had questions. Why does life have to be like this? How long will the family be separated? Will we ever be together again? Due to all the confusion, Katsumi began to lash out constantly. It was like she was a mini version of her father. She needed answers. She needed to be led out of the dark. She needed to know. And it was time you told her. And boy, did you tell her something.
“Katsumi...your father left..because of me. I’m sorry. I was a horrible wife..and he just couldn’t take it anymore. It was understandable as to why he left..so..don’t be mad at him. Okay?” Y/N told her daughter.
Yup. You lied to her. You lied to your Katsumi but you had your reasons. A girl should think well of her father. Especially when that girl considered her father to be her best friend. So no, you didn’t tell Katsumi that the real reason you were separated was because her father cheated on you. You just couldn’t. Not when you knew Katsuki held the most important relationship in his daughter’s heart.
The relationship between a father and daughter is something irreplaceable. Something special. You couldn’t ruin it for her. So you were okay with her being mad at you, for her blaming you. As long as she was satisfied with her father-daughter “relationship,” that was good enough for you.
However, even though you put the blame on yourself, it didn’t stop Katsumi from being mad at her father too. He should’ve stayed. He should’ve tried to work things out. You both were her parents! You couldn’t even at least try to stay together for the sake of her? After finding out the “truth,” Katsumi did indeed grow resentment towards her dad. You were right in the end, and she no longer wanted to see him. That was fine with you. She could hate him, but as long as she didn’t know he was truly a scum, then that was settling as well.
Anger and fury resided in Katsumi. It bubbled up inside her and for the first 3 years in her teenage life, she was a child straight out of hell. Constantly in trouble, constantly taking out her anger on the world. You couldn’t blame her though, it was Katsuki’s fault she was like this. And you soon realized it was your fault since you lied to her too. Even so, you still didn’t tell her the truth. You opted to allowing Katsumi to express herself but with you and you only.
Katsumi was a good child at heart, but she was just lost in the dark. So when her mother allowed her to take her anger out on her, Katsumi did NOT lay a fist on her mother. Instead, she broke down. She broke down hard. Like she’s been broken all along.
“Was I not a good enough reason for him to stay?!” She sobbed out in anger as tears flowed down her face. You held your daughter as she cried and tore down all her walls she spent years building up. “I understand if your relationship was tough..but I hoped that maybe he would’ve came back to try for me at least. How could he just run away?! I just want my parents together. I just want to be considered! I’m not like other kids! I don’t have a family!!”
“I’m sorry, Katsumi.” You would whisper into her hair as she balled her eyes out. You didn’t expect your rebellious and strong child to be so..torn. You knew she was broken and you tried to help however you could but you never expected a meltdown. You were glad it happened though. After that day, followed a few more breakdowns. It was like Katsumi was opening the gates to allow everything to be bare just for her mother to see.
Her mother. Someone she now fully and completely trusts. Someone she loves. She allowed her mother to see all her cracks and damaged pieces. And thank god she did because now your mother-daughter relationship was better than ever. Katsumi replaced the thoughts of her father with happy memories of you. Instead of her father, her mother became her keeper, her guardian, her protector, her hero.
—
You smile as you look back on the journey you and your daughter traveled on. A happy family of 3, to a sad and confused duo, to a timid and raging two, to finally a content and happy mother and daughter. It’s been one hell of a ride for you, but if it meant reaching Katsumi’s happiness, then you’d happily do it all again.
“G’morning mom!” Katsumi happily said as she walked into the kitchen.
“There’s the beautiful birthday girl!” You happily said as you turned to your 16 year old daughter. Katsumi was no longer harmful towards others. Your once brutal and ruthless bully of a daughter became a sweet, sassy, and fun teenage girl. She was happy now. The sadness and anger finally left...at least, that’s what you thought. And that’s what she thought too. But the inner Katsumi was still in shambles...just..nobody knew that. Not even herself.
Katsumi was quick to jump onto you and give you a hug. She loved you. You became her best friend, her rock. Her protector and hero. It was always you two against the world and Katsumi wouldn’t have it any other way. “Not to be ‘self absorbed’ or anything, but are we doing anything special today?”
“Welll~ I know we haven’t seen them in a few months but I pulled some strings and so! Uncle Kiri, Uncle Denki, Uncle Sero, and of course Auntie Mina will be coming over to celebrate your 16th birthday!” You said with enthusiasm. You watched as your daughter’s jaw drop in happiness as tears of joy began to fill her eyes.
“Seriously?!” She asked with excitement and watched as you nodded your head. She jumped onto you once more and squeezed you tight. “Mom, that’s amazing! Thank you!”
You smiled as your daughter beamed with happiness. It’s been awhile since the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) came to see Katsumi. Everytime they left their homes, Bakugou grew suspicious and assumed they were seeing Katsumi (and you of course), and even though he was right, he couldn’t know that. So to keep your location hidden from Katsuki, they had to stop seeing you and Katsumi for some time. After a few months, they decided it was perfect for them to pop up again on her 16th birthday, a very special time in a young girl’s life.
“Anything for you Sweetie! C’mon, I made your birthday breakfast and then we can get ready for the day. They’ll be here very soon!” You said to your daughter. She nodded and you both took your seats at the island, enjoying the delicious meal.
Growing up, Katsumi did indeed have friends, but they were more like school friends. She only talked to them in an educational environment but outside of school, her best friend was her mother. She was all she needed. Her friends were her aunt and uncles and that’s why she was more than happy to spend her 16th birthday with just them.
—
Katsuki looked at the date. His heart stung in pain as he stared down at the calendar.
“Katsumi’s birthday.....happy birthday Baby Bear.” He said in a broken voice. The same broken voice he had that day you left him. The same broken voice he’s had ever since you left him.
It’s been 11 years since you left. It’s been 5 since Katsumi decided she no longer wanted anything to do with him. Katsuki felt like he lost everything and in a way, he did. Even so, he kept the house the same in hopes that one day you’d return.
Over a decade has passed and Katsuki still holds hope that maybe..maybe if he prays long and hard enough..if he remains hopeful..his world will go back to normal.
Katsuki was so lost in thought that he didn’t even realize his own friends were possibly going to visit you and Katsumi. It wasn’t until he heard his phone ding and looked to see a notification from Denki to the Bakusquad group chat. Denki must’ve realized he texted the wrong chat room because he never sent another text. Coming to that conclusion, Bakugou assumed something was going on and so he got ready to make a quick trip to his best friend’s house to get in the know. This was a stretch considering they never told him anything about you, which he’ll agree is deserved, but regardless he won’t stop trying.
He got ready and once he was done he was right out the door. As he pulled up to the house he noticed not only Kirishima and Mina, he saw Sero and Kaminari. Something was definitely up. He pulled over to the side and just watched. He saw the 4 friends talking and laughing and finally, he saw the gifts. That’s what gave it away. He watched as the friends packed gifts into their cars and once he saw Kirishima bring a cake, that was all the confirmation Katsuki needed. They were going to see you. They knew where you were.
Katsuki stayed hidden as he followed his friends on the road. He stayed a few cars behind and took on a slow pace. Thankfully, they never noticed him. As the ash blonde drove he couldn’t help but feel a little stinging in his chest and butterflies in his belly. He was so excited to see you..see his daughter..his family.
The drive felt like forever and it probably was. Katsuki looked at his location on the map and it was then that he really saw how far you had moved. It hurt his heart realizing how much you really didn’t want to see him but the fact that he was going to reunite with you soon was overcoming any negative thoughts or feelings. Eventually, his friends ahead of him had arrived and of course, Katsuki followed. The blonde parked a little ways off from the house and waited. He figured that seeing him would cause some shock throughout the home. Katsuki didn’t expect you or Katsumi to be happy to see him but he didn’t care. He’s willing to go through whatever to bring you both back. So, instead of going in right away, he allowed you and Katsumi to enjoy yourselves for some time before he went in and crashed the place.
—
“Happy birthday to you~”
“Blow out the candles, sweetie!” You said while holding the cake. Katsumi smiled, took a tiny breath, and took out the small flames. You all clapped for the now 16 year old girl and you placed the cake down. Playful banter and happy talks were discussed all around as you began to cut the cake and pass around slices.
“I can’t believe our little Katsumi’s all grown up!” Kaminari sobbed into Sero’s shoulder. The slender man made a face of disgust as slobber got all over him and pushed the electric blonde off.
“We’re so happy we got to see you today, kid.” Sero said to the smiling little lady.
“I’m really glad I got to see you guys too! You really made this birthday something special. I love you guys! Especially you, Mom. Thanks for everything.” Katsumi said as she walked to you and wrapped her arms around you.
“I’d give the whole world for you Katsumi. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy. Your smile s’all I’ll need.” You said while rubbing soft circles onto her back. You released the hug as chatter grew again.
On the outside, Bakugou was pressed with his back against the door. He was lucky it was pretty late, so no one would take notice of the pro hero snooping on some “random” house. As Bakugou listened in on the party inside, he teared up at the sound of the singing. What you all didn’t know was that on the other side of the door, Bakugou was also singing and wishing his daughter a happy birthday. Although it was Katsumi’s day, Bakugou took her wish, and begged for his family back.
He stayed outside the door for awhile but the sound of his name made his ears perk. “So..how are things with Bakugou?”
—
You rolled your eyes at Mina’s question. “C’mon. Seriously? Like I’d know.” You laughed a little.
“Y/N, I’m being serious. Katsumi’s 16 now. She hasn’t seen Bakugou in 5 years. Don’t you think it’s a little tough on both of them?” Your pink friend asked. You soften your eyes a bit as you looked towards your hands
“....Of course I do, Mina. Katsumi has always been a daddy’s girl.” You said while looking towards your daughter, who was laughing with her uncles. “She loves him...and so do I. But it was her choice to not see him. ....She thinks I don’t know it, but I’m well aware of just how bad Katsuki’s absence is hurting her. She puts up a strong facade, but I’m her mother and I can see through it. She misses him but she’s too hurt by what happened.”
“But still, what about Bakugou? I know what he did was horrible-“
“Extremely.”
“Right. But he’s still my friend. He tells us everything. He’s so broken by what happened and I’m not saying you should forgive him but if Katsumi misses her dad as much as Bakugou misses the both of you, maybe she should consider seeing him again.” Mina mentioned. You couldn’t believe yourself but you honestly began to consider it.
Back with Katsuki, his eyes widened a bit. A small smiled grew on his face and tiny tears of joy filled his eyes. He made a reminder to thank Mina for her recommendation for you. If you agreed to it, he might get his Baby Bear back. ..He might get you back too. However, a sudden voice made his hopes shaky.
—
“No, she shouldn’t.”
You and Mina both looked behind you to see your daughter standing there. You both held shocked expressions as you watched her.
“..Katsumi..you don’t ever think of seeing him again?” You asked as her expression grew a mix of hurt and anger.
“No! Not after what he did to you! What he did to us.” She said. You kicked yourself as you and Mina were reminded of the lie you told your daughter. He did hurt the two of you...just not in the way that she thinks. “If he was lucky, and his reasons were good enough, then maybe, maybe I’d forgive him. And maybe I’d go back to seeing him. But he’s gone and he’s not coming back.”
—
On the other side of the door, Katsuki grew hurt by the memories of what he did. After hearing his daughter’s words, he had enough and finally worked up the courage to knock on the door.
—
“-he’s not coming back.”
*knock* *knock* *knock*
The 3 of you looked to the door and were shocked at the new guest. Nobody else was scheduled to come. Who could it be? You watched as Kirishima went to open it and took notice of his surprised face. He said a few quiet words, nodded, and then took a few steps away from the door. He looked towards you and your daughter and you felt the whole world stop as you all looked to the man in front of you who had just stepped in.
“....Hey.”
“.....Katsuki.” You said with small tears in your eyes. You looked towards your daughter to see a sad and hurt expression on her face as her jaw slightly dropped.
“...Dad.”
—
“So.....you’re back.” You said with a broken and bittersweet voice as you stepped to him. You crossed your arms as a way to hold yourself in comfort and to put on a strong front in front of Katsuki. Only problem was, he was the man you loved and who loved you. You’ve been together since you both were babies. He knows how you truly feel.
Bakugou chuckled a bit as he put his hands in his pockets and stepped towards you. “Thank you, Y/N.”
“For what?” You quickly and sternly asked.
“For keeping my secret. You think my dumbass friends wouldn’t tell me what you did?” He began before he was interrupted.
“Hey! At least these dumbasses know it ain’t cool to crash a party!” The electric dunce said as he took another bite of cake.
“Denki!” The rest of the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) shouted. Bakugou shook his head with a small laugh before continuing.
“Thank you for protecting Katsumi from me. You never once sold me out.” He explained with sad eyes and a hurt smiled. You used your arms to console yourself as you rubbed your sides for warmth. A warmth that only Katsuki could ever help you feel.
“Yeah well...a girl should think well of her father.” You said as you stepped to the side and you both turned to face Katsumi. She held her hands together by the fingers before dropping them and walking to her dad.
“Hi Katsumi.” Katsuki said with a loving, cracked voice. You all watched as Katsumi took small breath before speaking.
“...W-Why are you here? And what do you mean Mom never sold you out? What are you guys talking about?” She asked with her teary eyes.
“..I can answer all of those questions if you talk to me. In private, I’d prefer.” Bakugou said. Katsumi shook her head no before taking a few steps back.
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” She said.
“Katsumi,” the said girl looked to her mother who called for her. “You should talk to him.”
“What?” The Bakusquad said.
“What?” Katsumi said.
“What?” Bakugou said.
“There’s some things that you need to know.” You turned to Bakugou as you said this part. “Some things that only you can tell her. That you should tell her. .....You both can talk on the patio.”
“Mom, I don’t want to-“
“I’m not asking, Katsumi. I’m telling you. Go talk to your father. There’s something that you should know.” You sternly said to your daughter. She only stared at you for a minute before looking towards Bakugou and walking to the patio. Bakugou looked towards you and saw you nod your head for approval to follow her. Before he left he pulled you in for a hug. As much as you wanted to hate it, you couldn’t. His scent engulfed you and his warmth finally reached you after so many years. You missed him and your mind and body were quick to give in. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held onto you by your waist. He embraced all of you and melted into your soft touch that he so dearly missed.
“Thank you, Y/N......I love you.” He whispered into your neck only for you to hear. You nodded, but he knew you still felt the same way when you squeezed him tighter. He smiled at that, and you both finally released each other before he walked to his daughter who was waiting outside.
He opened the back door to find his daughter waiting at the outdoor table. He took a seat across from her and just smiled. She’s really here. In front of him. He finally got to see not only the love of his life but his precious little girl as well.
“...It’s so good to see you, Baby Bear....you’ve grown so much.” He softly said to her. She looked up with sad, angry eyes as she glared at him.
“....Why are you here, dad?” She said in a hurt tone. Bakugou held a shaky smile as she said that word. Dad. Granted, it was no longer daddy but it was something. He loved it either way. He needed to hear it.
“A lot of reasons. To wish my daughter a happy 16th...to apologize..and explain..to see my daughter..my family-“
“We’re not your family. You left us. You don’t leave family.” Katsumi sternly interrupted.
“Right...‘I left you guys.’ ......Baby Bear-“
“Don’t call me that.”
Ouch. That hurt Katsuki’s heart. Broke it even more than it already was. “...There’s something I have to tell you. Something your mother didn’t. Something she lied to you about..to protect me.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Mom is perfect! And amazing! She would never lie to anyone especially me!” Katsumi pointed out as she raised her voice at her father.
“She really is perfect and amazing...and I was dumb enough to lose her. Katsumi...I know your mom told you that I left you both..but in reality...She..left me.” Bakugou said. It felt like lead fell onto his body as he watched his daughter fall into confusion.
“N-No...no you’re lying!” Katsumi said as she stood up and slammed her hands on the table. Katsuki didn’t flinch as he expected this reaction. “She wouldn’t! She wouldn’t tear apart our family..she..she wouldn’t do that...to..to me.” She said as her voice progressively got softer with each word. “Quit lying and just admit that you left us! That you put me and Mom through hell!” Her voice rose once more. “Was I not enough for you to stay?! What did I do that was wrong?! I thought we were the perfect family! I thought...we were happy. Was I not a good enough reason to stay? You couldn’t even try for me? For your daughter? You didn’t even take my feelings into consideration when you left. You didn’t even think about me, Dad.”
Bakugou couldn’t believe it. Your lie was supposed to protect Katsumi, but instead it installed all these insecurities she now has. His friends had told him Katsumi was finally happy..but he guessed she hid all her thoughts..just like he would. She really was his daughter. “Katsumi...it wasn’t like that.”
“You’re lying!!!” Katsumi screamed to herself as tear drops began to fall.
“Katsumi! It’s been 11 years since your mother left me and 5 since I got to see you!” He said with a hurt voice. “Do you honestly think I would wait this long, spend years to find your new home, and come all the way out here just to lie to you?” He watched as his daughter’s face fell as she realized he wasn’t lying. He watched as her faith in her mother deteriorated. He couldn’t let that happen. “Don’t be mad at her though. Be mad at me. She had every reason to leave.”
“..What did you do?” She asked unbothered. She doesn’t care about anything anymore. She doesn’t think she could get any more hurt. Her best friend and mother lied to her about something so crucial. What could possibly make it worse? Katsuki felt his heart beat all around his body. He grew nervous and his palms grew sweatier than usual.
“...I-..Katsumi..*sigh* ...I’m so sorry, Baby Bear.” He slightly sobbed. Katsumi now grew interested. She couldn’t remember much but from what she could, she doesn’t think she ever saw her father cry. Even in the worst situations, he never broke. He always put up a strong front for the world. For her.
“Dad?...” she asked as she sat up in her chair.
“....Katsumi...your mom left me..because I cheated on her.”
There it was. The truth was finally revealed to Katsumi. Plain and simple. Her E/C eyes popped as angry tears filled them. Hurt. Betrayal. Fury. All those emotions she abandoned years ago all came rushing back through her. She began to shake as her breath grew heavy. Bakugou apologized over and over with his head down. Katsumi felt her palms grow hot as they began to spark. Out of anger, she screamed and hit her father with an explosion. The same explosions she got from him.
She watched as her father flew back a few feet and cringed in slight pain. Her blast wasn’t intended to hurt him completely but was more meant to keep him at a distance. She watched as Bakugou got up from the floor and faced her again. Her tears fell heavy as a shadow casted over her eyes. Screw the distance. She ran to him and began punching his chest with everything she had. Thanks to his training, and Katsumi’s distraught state, Katsuki felt little to no pain. He could only look down in heart break as he watched his daughter become a mess due to his actions.
“H-How could you?!” She said as she continued to hit him. “How could you do that to us?! TO MOM! TO ME!” She said and finally looked to her father, showing him her tears, cherry red rose, and puffy eyes. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU PUT US THROUGH?! Do you have any idea what kind of hell Mom went through?! Mom doesn’t know it but I saw her face! I saw the tear streaks in the mornings, her red, swollen eyes! I saw her sadness behind her happy cover! And not to mention what I did to her! My family broke and I became a little terror. I caused Mom hell. ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, DAD! YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH?! I had to leave my home! I had to move away from my friends! My family! I HAD TO LOSE MY FAMILY! I HAD TO LOSE YOU!!”
Inside the house, the group of friends could hear everything. All the yelling, the shouting. The anger and pain. Y/N had rivers flowing down her face as she covered her sobs with her hand. Her friends settled around her and comforted her through this horrible time. Outside, Bakugou’s face went into a slight shock at his daughter’s last sentence. “W-What?”
“I had to lose you, Dad! You think I don’t remember? You were my best friend. My idol and hero. To me, it never got better than you. ...But you did this? You betrayed Mom. You betrayed me. I love you, Dad, I still do...but I guess you never loved me or Mom.” Katsumi said as she looked down again.
“Katsumi that’s not true. I love both of you with my entire being-“
“So then why’d you do it?” His daughter asked with her voice, laced with pain.
“I was drunk and made a stupid mistake. It’s a day I completely regret because it was the day I tore apart my family and lost everything.” Bakugou said.
“Tch, you didn’t lose anything at all! You still have the house, the money, the fame, the fans. You’re still a pro, you still have everything!” Katsumi shouted.
“I don’t have you or your mother.” Silence grew at the beginning of his confession. “Like I said, you both are my entire being. Yes, I love my job and I’m grateful for everything I’ve earned and accomplished but I’d give it all up in a heartbeat if it meant I’d get to bring you and your mother back home to me. I don’t care about anything else other than the two of you. You haven’t seen me in the past 5 years and in the last 11 years when you did see me when you came over, you never saw my broken side. You never saw how distraught I was. You never saw the hell I went through because I don’t have the two of you, at home, with me.”
Bakugou stepped to his daughter and wrapped his arms around her to hold her. She allowed him to do so and began to silently cry in his chest. She refused to hold him back as her head was still in a cloud of confusion. Does she forgive him? Go back to seeing him? Try to bring her family back together? What to do, what to do.
“I’m sorry for everything I put you through Katsumi. Both you and your mother. I ruined our family and it’s something I’ve regretted for over a decade. But I won’t let you both go. I will do everything in my power to bring our family back together so we can be happy again. And I’m starting here, by telling you the truth.” Bakugou explained. Silence grew once more and Katsumi had finally made her decision.
“Well I suggest you stop trying..’cuz you’re never bringing us back.” Katsumi said as she pushed her father off of her and narrowed her eyes at him. Bakugou stared at his daughter with wide eyes.
“What?” He asked with an exasperated voice.
“You committed the ultimate betrayal. You broke Mom’s heart, betrayed me and her, and broke this family apart. You ruined us. We’ve finally picked ourselves back up and I don’t think we should let the guy who wrecked our world come back into it. ...I’m glad you came and told me the truth..thank you for that..hope you get home safe.” Bakugou was hurt but he understood where she was coming from. He watched as his daughter began to walk away but he wanted to keep her around as long as he could. He knew this probably would be the last time he would get to see her for awhile.
“I’m sorry!” He said with a sob. He watched Katsumi flinch to his sudden booming voice and turn to him. Bakugou looked at his daughter with teary eyes. “You..you turned out great. You’re the best daughter I could ever ask for. Your Mother did a great job at raising you...I just wish I could say the same.”
As Katsumi took in his words, she could feel a heavy weight fly off of her chest. “.....Woah.”
“What?” Bakugou asked.
“...F-For so long, I’ve been mad at the world. For a period of time, I was mad at mom. But for the past 11 years, I always thought I wasn’t good enough. I thought I was a problem..and I was so broken and mad,” Katsumi looked up to her father with tears at the ends of her eyes and a tiny smile. “I-...I’m not mad anymore...thanks to you.”
Katsumi ran back to her dad and wrapped her arms around him. Bakugou was shocked but felt the tears build up again. He wrapped his arms around her and held his daughter tight for as long as she would allow. Time passed and it was clear the both of them were trying to hold onto this father-daughter moment for as long as they could, but Katsumi knew it was time to let go. Before releasing her hold on her father, she allowed herself to say her farewells.
“Goodbye Daddy....I love you.” Was all she said before pulling away from her dad and walking back into the house. Bakugou watched her go and dropped his head as he allowed himself to cry in peace.
When Katsumi entered the house, she was quick to break down again and sob. She ran to her mother who immediately wrapped her arms around her sad daughter. They both held onto each other as Katsumi said her apologies.
“I’m so sorry Mom! There was a time where I blamed you and none of this was your fault. I’m so sorry!” She sobbed and you pulled her back so you could face her.
“It’s okay, Katsumi, it’s okay,” you whispered. “Don’t apologize for anything. None of this was your fault, okay?” Katsumi only nodded as you pulled her in for another hug. The Bakusquad offered to take her back up to her room so she could settle down and you nodded as you allowed your daughter to head to the comfort of her room. The Bakusquad went to help her cheer up and they of course brought the comedic genius, Kaminari, with them.
“Nothing brings more joy in sad times than a goofy uncle!” Kaminari said as the 4 of them walked up the stairs.
“I could name so many more things, Denki. Trust me.” Mina said as she walked along side him. You chuckled at their conversation as they walked up the stairs but soon, your attention was directed to the opening back door. Katsuki walked in with a sad expression but gave a happy glance once he saw you. He walked towards you and you gave him a sad smile.
“So...I guess now she knows.” You said to break the silence.
“Um...yeah..she knows.” Bakugou said as he looked towards the ground. “......Y/N..I’m so sorry,” he said looking back at you. “If I could go back in time and stop myself I would. Because then I would still have my family. My daughter....you. I’d still have you and Katsumi and we’d still be in the same house with another kid a few years younger than Katsumi and then maybe we’d have another on accident because everyone knows I can’t keep my hands to myself when it comes to you,” he joked sadly. You laughed at his fantasy and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have similar thoughts.
“Yeah..just...maybe if things were different.” You said with your sad smile. Bakugou slowly went in to grab your hand and you allowed him as he moved in closer to you.
“I’m sorry, Teddy Bear-“
“Stop saying ‘sorry’ Katsuki,” you said as you threw your head back with your small smile still plastered on. You faced him again before speaking. “I know you’re sorry. But..there’s nothing that’s gonna change with it. Maybe it’s time for you to move on. Time for both of us to move on.”
Bakugou shook his head at the idea. “No. I know myself. I know I’ll never be able to let you both go. I’ll never be able to move on, even if I wanted to. But I am able to respect your wishes. If Katsumi doesn’t want to see me anymore....then I’ll give her what she wants.”
“I’m sorry, Katsuki.” You said in regards to your daughter.
“S’not your fault Teddy Bear. It’s mine, obviously. Just what happens when you’re an idiot.” He said, degrading himself. You giggled at his comment and went in to wrap your arms around his neck.
“Yeah..but you’re always gonna be my idiot.” You said into his neck. Bakugou held you tight and took in your intoxicating scent. He took the time to memorize the warmth you had, the way you smelt, the way you felt. How amazing it was to hold you in his arms. He drilled it all into his mind so he would never forget.
“I’m glad. ....I love you Y/N.” He said into your soft hair.
“......I love you too Katsuki.” You replied back with all the love you could give. You both pulled away to face each other but felt something immediately draw you back in. You pressed against each other closer than before as your lips slowly came in contact.
This was something Bakugou also drilled in. The way you tasted. Your sweet strawberry lips were something he would never forget. Something he could never resist. The kiss slowly grew more passionate and intense as Bakugou bit down on your bottom lip, releasing a very quiet moan from you. Quickly, he slipped his tongue in and you allowed it as you succumbed to him. The kiss was strong and Bakugou began to push you against a wall but when his hands traveled to the hill of your ass, gave it a squeeze, and you released another moan, you decided it was enough.
You pushed on Bakugou’s chest and kept him back a bit. He looked down at you in confusion but when he saw your small smile and little head shake he understood. He smiled down at you with sad eyes as he nodded. His hands returned to your waist and pulled you in for a final hug that you happily returned. He pulled away but not before giving you a sweet peck on your forehead. He finally stepped away from you and walked to the door. You followed him as you escorted him to the exit and with his hand on the knob, he opened it as he looked at you with the same sad smile that mirrored your own.
“Bye Y/N.” He said on the other side of the entrance.
“Bye Katsuki.” You said with your hand on the door. While he pulled on the knob, you lightly shut the door.
You both placed your backs on your own sides of the door and released a breath you both didn’t know you were holding. A heavy feeling finally hopped off your chests as you both looked up. You both knew that you weren’t letting each other go. That’d be impossible and you knew it. It was more of you both accepting the new reality. You loved each other, wholeheartedly and entirely, but this would have to be the end of your story together.
You’re not letting go...this is just goodbye.
#bakugo x reader#bakugou fanfiction#bakugou katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou imagine#bakugou x y/n#bnha#bnha bakugo katsuki#mha#bakugou fluff#bakugou smut#katsuki bakugou smut#bakugou katsuki smut#katsuki smut#katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou x reader#katsuki bakugou angst#katsuki bakugou#bakugo angst#bakugou angst#bakugou katsuki angst#katsuki angst#mha bakugo x reader#mha bakugo katsuki#mha bakugou#bnha bakugou#my hero academia bakugou#my hero academia#bnha bakugo x reader
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Red Lights
Request from anon: hiii I’m soo shy to ask this 😩 but can u do like a Dom!Shouto umm smut ahhh thankiew u can make ur own storyline haha eeekk thankiew again✨✨
Pairing: Dom!Shouto x sub!reader
Word count: 2.6k
Warnings: NSFW, MDNI, 18+, PWP, dom/sub relationship, daddy kink, breath play, impact play, breeding kink, quirk play, spitting, degradation, dumbification, dacryphilia
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“Fuck yes, baby girl, just like that.”
The words tumbled out of his lips like a hushed growl as juxtaposed hands worked their way into your hair; one ice cold and the other warm enough to coax sweat from your scalp immediately.
“You’re doing so good for Daddy.”
The sweet praises Shouto offered you further encouraged your efforts as you sheathed his entire cock within your mouth, your bottom lip placing soft pressure on his balls as you took him to the hilt, gagging and choking for air as your esophagus became suddenly all too full of his impressive length.
His deft fingers seized your hair in tight fists as a guttural groan rang against the walls of the living room. You could feel his thighs flex on either side of you, kneeling in your rightful place between his legs as he sat atop the couch.
Releasing his vice grip on your locks, he raked his right hand through the strands until he caught another fistful at the nape of your neck and forcefully tugged your head back.
His heterochromatic orbs bore into yours, a sadistic sheen of lust darkening them even further than the ambient red lights that shone down from the ceiling ever could.
“You’re really hungry for this cock tonight aren’t you, baby? Tell me how bad you need it and maybe I’ll let you have another taste.”
The icy coolness of his right palm soothed the heat of the sweat that had broken out over your body, but the grip he had on your hair didn’t falter.
His eyes searched your face and his left palm connected with his large member. He didn’t dare look away from your needy expression as he wrapped his fingers around his length, stroking it at an agonizingly slow pace.
Even in the dim lighting, you could see the veins on the underside of his pretty cock, stretching across the wide girth of the appendage. Just watching his fingers slowly drift up and down his shaft had you captivated and absolutely dripping with need.
You captured your bottom lip in your teeth, exhaling through your nose as your pussy clenched desperately at the emptiness between your thighs, trying in vain to catch some friction to relieve the ache deep in your belly.
The words flew from your lips, breathy and frantic with the lilt of a whine as you tried to steady your breathing.
“Please, Daddy..m’please lemme taste your cock again. I’ll be such a good girl. Need you to fill me up, pretty please, Daddy. I’d do anything just to taste you..”
Devious couldn’t begin to describe the smirk that flashed across his face. Before you got the chance to speculate what his next torture might be, you felt deliciously warm fingertips on either side of your jaw.
Your lips parted, forced open as he applied pressure, the pads of his fingers growing warmer against your flesh as you watched his jaw shift momentarily.
Finding his eyes again, you noticed his gaze drop to your open mouth as he leaned closer to you, finally relinquishing his hold on your hair.
His index finger found your bottom lip, tugging it down as he tilted his head forward and allowed a long string of saliva to pour from his mouth into your own, watching with possessive purpose as it pooled on your tongue.
“Swallow it.”
Heeding his command without question, you obeyed and felt your cunt clench even tighter as a desperate moan left your lungs.
The dirtier he made you feel, the deeper the need for you to satisfy his every want grew. He loved it. He adored it.
The way your eyes were already glassed over, still moist from the tears that pricked your eyes when you swallowed him whole. How your body reacted so beautifully to every little thing he did to you. How responsive you were to him even just looking at you the right way.
It hadn’t always been like this. When you two first got together, he had been so careful with you, as if you might break right there in his grasp if he mishandled you to even the slightest degree.
But once you had successfully assured him that you weren’t made of glass, he was willing to try out some of the things that you were interested in. He was still hesitant at first, but once he saw how your face contorted in ecstasy the first time he really tugged at your hair, he was genuinely intrigued.
The first time he heard you moan in response to the crack of his hand against your ass, he had warmed up to the idea of pushing the limits.
But the first time he saw your completely fucked out expression, tears streaming down your face as you tried in vain to beg him for more, too dumbed down by how good he was make your feel; that’s when he knew he was addicted.
Here you were again, on your knees and ready to submit to whatever he felt like subjecting you to tonight and he had nothing but time on his hands.
“Such a good little girl.” he crooned, notes of debasement peppering his tone. “Daddy’s obedient little whore. That’s what you are, isn’t it?”
Fire and ice met on your face, his hands cupping both of your cheeks as he leaned in close enough for you to feel his breath against your chin.
The exhilaration of the filth pouring from his lips coupled with the pressure building between your thighs made your head swim and you clenched your eyes shut.
“Yes, D-daddy. S’all I am. Just a filthy little whore for you. Please, use m—“
Frosty fingertips found your neck and squeezed with intention, causing your eyes to snap back open to see Shouto’s darkened demeanor.
“You want me to use you, baby? I might not be nice. Are you sure you can handle this?”
The condescension in his voice and the way you now had to struggle to pull more air into your lungs made you squirm, which was exactly what he was hoping for.
His lips pressed against yours, conveying a sense or urgency with the way they collided so eagerly. The chill of his fingertips left your throat and slid up the side of your face, cupping your cheek for the briefest of moments, before pushing into your hair.
You found yourself still breathless when your lips disconnected, panting as you whispered your needy pleas to him as if making a sacrificial offering to your own personal deity.
“Please, Daddy...‘s’all I want..I’ll be so good for you..”
He groaned, his cock twitching in anticipation as both of his hands moved behind you, finding purchase in the underside of your thighs.
In one swift motion, he leaned forward, standing up from the couch and lifted your off your knees. Your legs instinctively wrapped around him and you could feel his throbbing erection pressed against your abdomen.
Your arms circled around his neck as your mouths met once again, moans and sighs tangling between your tongues as he walked across the room.
The coolness of the wall met your back as he pressed you up against it, never slowing the efforts his lips were making as he leveraged you against the structure just enough to take a moment to align his cock with your entrance.
Your yelp met his now smirking lips, a symptom of trying to adjust to sinking into his entire length so quickly.
His hips moved slowly, mercifully so, as he graciously gave you time to adjust to the sensation of this new position. It didn’t take long until a grateful moan rang in his ears, which he took as a sign to pick up the pace. 
A chill crept over you neck as he decorated your skin with icy cool kisses, each one leaving a layer of frost behind, which was quickly melted away by the friction between you two.
His labored breathing and sinfully satisfied grunts tickled your ears as you tilted your head to the side, giving him better access.
The feeling of him sliding in and out of your slick, velvety walls, concocted with the added stimulation of the ice quickly turning to slush and slipping between your torsos, had you reeling.
The wall was suddenly absent from behind you. He had taken a few steps back and your arms tightened around his neck in response to the loss of the added support.
“M’relax baby girl, just trust me, okay?”
Shouto’s husky voice sounded like liquid honey, sweet, but thick. Thick with sensual promise. Your arms loosened as you relaxed into his hold, allowing his hands to bear the majority of your weight.
The muscles of his capable arms flexed taut, coated with a thin veil of sweat as he lifted you, up and down, over and over again. Each time you sank back down, you could feel the head of his cock connecting with your cervix, coaxing louder and louder moans to tumble from your throat until all you could do was whine and haphazardly mutter about how fucking good he was making you feel.
“You love this, don’t you, bitch? Like getting fucking rammed by this fat cock? How fucking deep I can stuff the pretty little pussy of yours?”
Tears welled in your eyes as the pressure inside your center became insurmountable. His disgusting words were sending you hurdling towards the apex of your journey and all you could do was try to hang on.
Your nails duh into the nape of his neck, clinging to his as if your life depended on it. His motions were so fluid and he was still picking up speed as he took in your contorted face. He was bouncing you effortlessly on his cock and eagerly awaiting the very moment you came undone.
“Let go, baby girl, come all over Daddy’s cock like a good girl. Show me what a good fucking girl you are, that’s it.”
His devious commands catapulted you over the edge as a shriek of pure, unadulterated pleasure ripped from your lungs. He didn't bother slowing down, instead choosing to pound the rest of your high out of you. There was no going easy tonight.
He marveled at the sight of your expression, willing himself to hold off on his own release, so he could see yours through. His arms never wavered, holding you securely and thrusting you up and down along his length until you were shaking from the pleasure still sending waves through your body.
“D-daddy, t—..thank you s’much, Daddy..oh fuck..”
Your eyes were too heavy to open, the pleasure still buzzing too high across every single one of your nerves as you felt the familiar fabric of the couch against you back.
“Good girls get what they want. And we’re not finished yet.”
Thought your arms were practically useless, he captured your wrists between one of his strong hands and pinned them above your head, rising his other hand to tuck under your hips and tug you toward the edge of the couch.
“You want Daddy to fill you up, sweetie? Pack this tight cunt of yours with my cum?”
You mewled as your pussy clenched tight around his impossibly hard cock and you realized he was about ready to burst inside you, but you had no words left to beg for what you so desperately wanted.
A nearly feral growl escaped him as he felt your walls grow even tighter around his throbbing length. He angled himself above you, so that his hips could continue their merciless assault on your body with gravity’s assistance.
“Of course you fucking do. You’ll beg for whatever I’m willing to give you, won’t you, you cock-hungry slut?”
He lifted his left hand and briefly lit it aflame, before extinguishing the blaze just before he palm connected with your ass, drawing a whelp and a gratuitous moan out of you.
“Beg for it. Beg for me to pump you full, darling. Beg me to use and abuse your pussy as I please. Unless you’re already to fucked out to form words.”
His still scorching palm slapped across your breast, before offering a fleetingly soothing rub and catching your nipple between his thumb and index fingers, tweaking it in just the right way to have you about to fall of the cliff of another climax.
“P-please, Daddy!”
Your cries were almost frantic, so desperate sounding for any and all of the filthy things he would do to you.
“Please fucking fill me up with your cum! Please don’t stop fucking me, Daddy! I want you, I want you, I want you..!”
More ritualistic chants sprang from your lips as Shouto’s head snapped back, his jaw going slack and a powerful groan reverberating throughout the room as he shot ribbons of white within your most hallowed halls. You were quick behind him, the sensation of his seed releasing within you sending you over that cliff again.
Your bodies both shook in sequence, as if passing those delicious tremors back and forth to one another as you coasted on your respective highs.
“Fuck, baby girl..”
His hips slowed as he rode out the lingering shock of his eruption, trailing gentle fingers over your hips.
“M’thank you, baby.”
Slowly, he pulled out and you relished the feeling of how well his cock always filled you up as you tried to catch your breath, still unable to form coherent words. His forehead pressed against yours and you could see his soft smile just inches from yours as he spoke in a gentle, husky whisper.
“You are so wonderful, you know that? Lemme take care of this mess. I’ll be right back, okay?”
Gentle kisses traced down your jaw line, over your chin, and all the way to your lips, where he let his mouth linger as he sighed through his nose. The feeling of his smile against your lips never failed to make your heart flutter and now was no exception.
He was still smiling as he forced himself to break the contact and tear himself away from you. For a moment, he disappeared into another room, until he returned with a small towel, dampened on one end, and a glass of water, which he was sipping when he reappeared.
Extending the glass to you, he sat beside you on the couch, letting you quench your thirst as he cleaned up the mess he has made of you.
“How are you feeling, baby? I wasn’t too rough, was I?”
Traces of concern were evident in his mismatched eyes as he laid down on the chaise of the couch, extending his hand to you to invite you into his embrace. Slipping your hand in his, you allowed him to guide you from your position on the couch and against his chest, your back to his front, as he placed a hand on your hips.
“No, babe, not at all,” you smiled as you reassured him. “That was amazing. I know you’re never going to hurt me. I don’t think you’re capable.”
A quiet giggle echoed around you as you felt him kiss along your shoulder and up your neck, before nuzzling your cheek and placing one last, sweet kiss there.
“I never want to. I love you so much, y/n.”
He let his head rest on the couch, tugging you gently against him, so that you were as close as you could comfortably be.
“I love you too, Sho.”
His lips turned up in smile as he kissed the top of your head, letting his eyes close as yours already had, and the two of you drifted off into sleep curled up together.
#shoto imagine#shouto todoroki#todoroki smut#todoroki imagine#todoroki x reader#todoroki shouto#mha todoroki#shouto smut#shoto smut#mha imagines#mha x reader#mha x you#todoroki x you#bnha#my hero#my hero x reader#my hero academia imagines#my hero academia#boki no hero academia#todoroki
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The Singer – Part Two
Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader
Words: 7,970
Warning: Lots of Smut, Some Swearing
Tag List (Cillian):
@lilymurphy03 @deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall @elenavampire21 @hanster1998 @mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-my-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang @0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee @cloudofdisney @missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey
Cannot Tag (please check your settings):
@l0tsofpennies @margoo0 @trolleydolly @avonlady1985 @chrisevanshoeee @daydreamingnymph @fookingshelby @chocolatehalo
***Drinks and Secrets***
Seven days after your last encounter with Kurt, you finally had his desk delivered back to his office which was located at the Dublin theatre and music district at the back building of a large venue.
Next to his office were several recording studios which meant that, whilst you were recording your new album, you saw him more frequently than you would have hoped.
In addition to working on your new album, you were working on an advertising campaign for the upcoming arts and music festival. As part of this campaign, you were recording a song with Amanda and another Dublin artist named Jeremy who gained a lot of popularity lately.
He was a nice man, in his late thirties who had a lot to offer. He played several instruments and it was easy to work with him and Amanda, at least until Amanda tried to organise a date between you and Jeremy.
She told you about it over some drinks on a Friday afternoon following a day at the recording studio.
‘I have two tickets to see the new play at the Abbey. I was going to see it with Cillian but, since we broke up, this isn’t going to happen. I thought that, perhaps, you could go with Jeremy’ Amanda said with a big grin on her face as she handed you a pint of Guinness.
‘Jeremy? Why would I go with Jeremy?’ you laughed, somewhat surprised by Amanda’s suggestion.
‘He is handsome, a real gentleman, funny and defiantly not a douche like Kurt. Despite, you said that you liked older and more mature guys’ Amanda laughed.
‘Well, perhaps you should ask him out yourself then?’ you giggled, causing Amanda to sigh.
‘I am not ready to date anyone Y/N. In fact, I don’t know if I am over Cillian yet’ Amanda said somewhat disappointed, causing you to take in a deep breath as you thought about your recent encounter with Cillian.
You were overrun with guilt as Amanda continued on, talking about her breakup with Cillian. You knew that you shouldn’t have slept with him, but then again, you didn’t know that you and Amanda would be working together again until three days ago when one of the other musicians dropped out of the project.
‘So, do you think you will give it another chance?’ you asked curiously.
‘I don’t think so. I think he made up his mind. To be honest, I don’t know if I still have feelings for him or if I just miss the sex’ Amanda laughed just before she ordered another drink.
‘Right…that good, eh?’ you said as your face turned red almost immediately. Of course, you knew the answer to your own question.
‘That’s probably too much information, I am sorry. The beer is getting to my head’ Amanda said with some embarrassment.
‘It’s fine, seriously’ you responded before telling Amanda a little bit about your relationship with Kurt.
In turn, after Amanda had more beers, you learned that Cillian liked to take control in the bedroom and you weren’t surprised about this in the slightest, thinking back to the night at your apartment where he took you over Kurt’s study desk. The same study desk that was now in Kurt’s office once again. The thought of it made you giggle internally.
But then, the conversation changed and became more serious when Amanda told you the real reasons behind their recent break up. She believed that she was at fault, pushing him away slowly over time with her jealousy and trust issues, trying to prevent him from socialising and leaving him no space for himself. She accused him of cheating several times but later found out that there was nothing behind the rumours. Cillian eventually had enough of her antics and broke it off again.
‘Oh my god, I am sorry. I usually don’t drink’ Amanda said as she observed your facial expression when she continued to talk about Cillian. She was certainly more direct and open about her sex life than you had hoped.
‘I think I should get you home’ you said with a warm smile, feeling a sense of responsibility, and Amanda nodded in agreement.
Since you only had two beers over two hours, unlike Amanda who had at least six or seven, maybe more, you were still able to drive and you helped Amanda to your car, hoping that press wouldn’t notice her state. After all, she had quite a following herself.
Twenty minutes later, you pulled up in front of Cillian’s house which was where she was still living at the time as the settlement of her property was delayed.
Supporting her, you walked towards the front door and rang the doorbell. Within a minute, Cillian opened and couldn’t believe his own eyes when he saw you with his completely drunk ex-girlfriend.
���Hi’ Cillian said somewhat surprised as he took hold of Amanda. She barely managed to walk by herself.
‘Hi’ you said, your eyes avoiding his.
‘Uhm, thank you…’ Cillian chuckled, not knowing what else to say to you, before asking you whether you wanted to come inside.
‘I would love to use your bathroom, if I could’ you laughed as you had to pull over earlier when Amanda got sick and your clothes smelled like vomit.
‘Sure, common in’ Cillian said just before he pointed you to the bathroom and helped Amanda getting out of her vomit-stained clothes.
You left the bathroom door open slightly as you cleaned yourself up and observed Cillian getting a bucket from the laundry before telling Amanda to have a rest.
After he helped her to lie down, placing the bucket next to the bed, he came into the bathroom to speak to you. He left the bedroom door open slightly so that he could hear if Amanda was getting sick, worried that she might miss the bucket in her state.
‘What happened? It’s only 6 o’clock’ Cillian asked almost amused.
‘She just kept drinking Cilly…I don’t know’ you said with a chuckle as you tried to wash the vomit out of your expensive vintage blouse.
‘Beer?’ he asked curiously, causing you to nod.
‘Fuck. I am in for an interesting evening then’ Cillian said somewhat irritated, causing you to laugh out loud.
‘So am I because I meant to see my sister and her husband for dinner at 7 o’clock and I smell like puke now’ you giggled, seeing the humour in all of this.
‘Have a shower here. I will get you a clean t-shirt’ Cillian suggested and you accepted his offer gratefully.
A minute later, Cillian gave you a towel and one of his black t-shirts. You closed the bathroom door behind you and got undressed.
When you stepped into the shower, you were slightly confused by all of the buttons. You never saw anything quite like this. You pressed one of the buttons and nothing happened. Then you pressed the next and, finally, water came rushing out from the top like waterfall but, it was cold.
‘Dammit’ you said loudly as the cold water came rushing down over your body, barely managing to wash away the little bit of soap you had placed on your chest and breasts earlier.
‘Having problems with the shower?’ Cillian asked from outside the bathroom door a few seconds after he heard you yell.
‘There is no hot water’ you said as you stepped out of the shower, wrapped the towel around you and opened the door.
Cillian stepped inside, gazing over your semi naked body for a second or two, before turning on the shower for you.
‘Wow, that’s high tech’ you giggled as you stood right next to Cillian, his body awfully close to yours.
‘Isn’t that usually how you young people roll?’ Cillian chuckled, causing you to give him a slight nudge and, in the process of it, loosing hold of your towel on one side.
Cillian noticed immediately and his jaw dropped as he drew a deep breath.
‘Cillian?’ you whispered as you noticed him looking at the ceiling, purposely trying to avoid eye contact with you.
‘Yeah’ he said with a low voice as he looked back at you but, instead of saying anything else to him, you pressed your lips onto his tentatively.
Cillian gave into the kiss and parted your lips with his slightly, allowing him to slip his tongue into your mouth in order to meet yours.
Your hands reached for his cheeks and the back of his head while your towel dropped to the floor.
‘We shouldn’t be doing this Y/N’ Cillian whispered as your lips drifted apart after what seemed like an eternity.
‘No, we shouldn’t’ you responded despite the fact that you wanted him, right then and there.
But, his lips landed on yours again almost instantly, ignoring the interfering thoughts in your heads.
As you were kissing, Cillian’s hand wandered over the back of your body and then in between you, immediately finding your wet mound.
You let out a low moan as his fingers began to gently massage your clit before one of his fingers dipped inside of you momentarily.
On your left upper thigh, you could feel his erection press against you, restricted by his tight and ripped jeans.
You pushed your mound against his hand as much as you could while he swallowed up your moans, continuing to kiss you passionately.
But, as he began to apply more pressure against your clit, you had to pull away from his mouth and moan escaped you.
His speed increased and you let your head fall forward against his chest and shoulder, taking in the scent of his aftershave and moaning into the thin black cotton of his t-shirt.
Your legs began to quiver within minutes and his magical fingers on your clit brought you over the edge fairly quickly.
You held onto Cillian, continuing to moan against his chest as your orgasm washed over you and he finally slowed down his movements.
‘Fuck’ you whispered as Cillian chuckled at the fact that he just made you cum within less than five minutes.
‘You should have a shower now or you’ll be late for dinner’ Cillian winked before pressing his lips onto yours again.
‘What about you?’ you asked quietly as you ran your hand over his crotch.
‘I better check on Amanda’ he said somewhat reluctantly before leaving you by yourself in the bathroom.
After a quick shower, you got dressed and returned to the living room where Cillian was sitting, watching a documentary.
When you approached him to give him a kiss, he pulled away.
‘We cannot keep doing this Y/N’ Cillian said quietly and it was obvious to you that he had been doing a lot of thinking while you were in the shower.
‘You are right’ you murmured, upset by his response.
‘Are we okay?’ he asked and you nodded.
‘Thanks for the shower’ you said a little upset before grabbing your keys and phone and returning to your car.
***Family***
Later that evening, at dinner with your sister and her husband, your sister asked you about your music projects and, of course, your love life.
She knew that you had separated from Kurt and, even though you called it a break, it was obvious to her and anyone from your family that this was final.
She was glad that it was over. Finally, you were free from him.
When she asked you if there was anyone else, you couldn’t help it but tell her about Cillian. But you didn’t tell her his name, nor did you tell her how you had met.
All that you told her was that there was a man who you had slept with and who you think you might like and this was the first time that you admitted your feelings for Cillian to yourself as well.
It felt strange to you as, initially, when you met Cillian, you couldn’t stand him but now that you got to know each other more intimately, this changed.
When you told your sister that he was 43, making him exactly twenty years older than you, her jaw dropped.
‘Forget about him Y/N. Honestly’ she told you, thinking that he was too old for you and the press would rip you to pieces about it, just as it happened with your ex-girlfriend which emotionally destroyed you at the time.
‘I’ve grown since then, emotionally and mentally and I cannot help it. His presence does something to me and, currently, I work with him all the time’ you said with a deep sigh.
‘Is he a musician?’ your sister asked curiously and you shook your head.
‘He’s an actor’ you admitted but went no further than that regardless of how much your sister was poking around, asking you for his name.
‘It doesn’t matter because it isn’t going anywhere with us and you are right, it’s probably better that way’ you said when she asked you for his name for the third time.
Your sister gave up eventually and, after several glasses of wine, you decided to stay at her house for the night before a big day at the studio finalising the schedule for the music festival.
The next morning, when you tried to start your car, the engine had stopped working. It was a brand-new car and you were extremely irritated and contacted the car dealer immediately.
The car dealer advised you that they couldn’t get the car in for repair until Monday and your sister luckily offered to drive you into Dublin city.
‘Do you have time for a coffee?’ she asked as she pulled up in front of the studio and nodded. You still had twenty minutes before your meeting with Cillian and Kurt.
You sat down at a booth table in the small café beneath the theatre and the waitress was quick to take your order and bring you some water.
‘The coffee here is really good’ you said to your sister but she seemed somewhat distant and unresponsive.
‘June? Are you with me?’ you chuckled and, suddenly she looked at you with wide open eyes and whispered ‘Cillian Murphy’.
‘What about him?’ you asked absolutely flustered.
‘Over there, at the counter’ your sister then whispered with excitement, causing you to take in a deep breath. He wasn’t the person who you wanted to see right at this moment, especially after what you told your sister last night.
‘He is my cheat pass’ your sister then said, causing you to inadvertently spit out some of the water in your mouth.
‘You are joking?’ you asked, causing your sister to shake her head and continue to stare at him.
‘I am going to say hello’ she said determined and you took her hand quickly and responded ‘no you are not’ which was when Cillian noticed you and walked over towards your table.
‘Morning Y/N’ he said with a smile before giving you a friendly kiss on the cheek.
‘Hi Cilly’ you said before introducing him to your sister with some embarrassment.
Your sister was quick to move to one side, indicating for Cillian to sit down next to her and he didn’t think anything of it and joined you both for coffees and a snack to eat.
The three of you engaged in some small talk and Cillian informed you that Kurt had called him earlier that day telling him that he was sick and wouldn’t be coming in.
You were glad about it in a way but it also meant that it was just you and Cillian working on the schedule which might be a problem after last night.
After you drank your coffees and engaged in some more conversation, each of you went your separate ways. Cillian and you had a days’ work ahead of you and your sister had to get back home.
A few minutes after you left the café, you got a test message from your sister. ‘Fuck he’s hot. Can you invite him for drinks with me or something’ it said and you couldn’t help but chuckle.
‘What’s so funny?’ Cillian asked as he observed your facial expressions and small giggles.
‘Nothing’ you responded before putting your phone away, ignoring your sister’s text message.
***Working Together***
The day went by quickly and you managed to be quite productive, finishing the schedule for the festival by 4 o’clock. There was no arguing anymore between you and Cillian and, with Kurt not being there, there was also no shouting.
As you were working together, you and Cillian kept your distance from each other, trying as hard as you could to stay focused and professional.
You sent the schedule off to Kurt for consideration and communication to the artists and Cillian offered you to drive you home after you told him about your car.
You agreed reluctantly as it was raining but all of your focus and professionalism went out of the window as soon as Cillian pulled up in front of your apartment.
‘Uhm, would you like to come up for a drink?’ you asked, knowing exactly that you shouldn’t have asked him that after last night.
‘I shouldn’t’ Cillian responded reluctantly. He knew he couldn’t get involved with you again. Another relationship was not what he wanted, especially not with someone as young as you.
‘I know, I shouldn’t have asked that. It’s fine. Thank you for driving me home. Have a good night’ you said before giving him a friendly kiss on his cheek before getting out of his car.
As you reached the front door of your apartment building and searched through your bag for the key, you heard the door of Cillian’s car close.
You looked back and saw Cillian approach you with a hesitant smile.
‘Changed your mind?’ you smirked as he walked up the pathway leading to the front door of your apartment block.
‘Yeah, I suppose’ Cillian smiled with his hands in his pockets like a shy schoolboy while he was waiting for you to open the door.
You finally found your key and you both took the elevator up to your apartment, keeping your distance from each other.
You opened the door to your apartment and Cillian followed you inside almost shyly, remaining standing in the doorway and asking ‘before I do anything stupid, it isn’t really a drink that you are after, right?’
‘No. In fact, all I’ve got is tap water’ you said almost embarrassed and, just after you did, you found yourself pinned against the wall and Cillian crashed his lips onto yours in a haste.
You parted your lips slightly, allowing his tongue to enter your mouth and explore yours in a passionate kiss.
With one foot, you pushed your apartment door closed behind you before you gave into the Cillian completely.
‘Not fire safety compliant’ Cillian murmured as your lips drifted apart, causing you to look at him with some confusion.
‘The door. It’s opening into the wrong direction’ Cillian chuckled, causing you to raise your eyebrows and start to laugh.
‘You are weird’ you chuckled before you pressed your lips back onto his, thinking why on earth he would have noticed this in the heat of the moment.
‘Coming from the woman with a Harry Potter tattoo beneath her left breast’ Cillian chuckled after your lips drifted apart again momentarily and he began to unbutton your mustard-coloured vintage shirt.
‘What can I say…I am magic’ you chuckled before you pulled him closer again for another kiss.
Each and every kiss was passionate and urgent, full of desire for each other.
‘Didn’t we say we wouldn’t do this again?’ you asked as your shirt landed on the floor.
‘You are the one who initiated it by asking me upstairs for a glass of tap water’ Cillian chuckled. ‘Do you want to stop?’ he then asked, causing you to shake your head and pull his t-shirt over his head exposing his bare chest.
‘Didn’t think so’ Cillian smirked before he trailed kisses over your breasts, which were still covered by a black lace bra, and then all the way down to your stomach. He dropped to his knees slowly while his lips explored your body and his hands began to fondle with the button and zipper of your jeans, pushing them down gently.
You let out a soft moan as his hands ran over the front of your treasure. His face was awfully close to your most intimate area and you could feel his hot breath on your wet mound, fanning through the lace of your panties.
With your jeans stuck over your ankles, Cillian pushed your legs apart with his hands as wide as he could.
‘Don’t move’ he instructed, causing you to take in a sharp inhale and, just as you did, he hooked the index fingers of both of his hands into the hem of your panties and pulled them down all the way to your ankles.
You wanted to push your legs together, feeling vulnerable now that he got such a close look at your wet mound. But, Cillian’s hands wouldn’t allow as he held your thighs in place while pushing you all the way back at the freshly painted wall of your apartment.
Cillian then moved to your inner thighs and his soft, wet tongue administered little licks, alternating with kisses, as he moved back and forth between your left and right thigh, ascending higher and higher as he did.
‘Hmm….fuck’ you moaned in anticipation, causing Cillian to smile against the flesh of your right thigh before looking up at you for a brief moment, his blue eyes meeting yours.
You bit your lip suggestively and then watched as that pink, wet, soft tongue of his slid out of his mouth in a flattened state and land on the right outer lip of your wet mound.
A loud moan escaped you as soon as his tongue moved closer towards your centre, giving your slit a very long, very slow, torturous lick.
You placed your hands on his head and ran your fingers through his hair as his tongue licked up and down before sinking it into your entrance once slightly, making you squirm.
‘Hold still’ he instructed as he pushed your thighs apart again with his hands.
With both outer lips equally swollen, you watched as he made his tongue pointed again, spreads your swollen outer lips and then licks both of your inner lips from back to front at the same time, sending shivers down your spine. He then ran his tongue over your clit hood and gently pulled the hood back, revealing your swollen, throbbing, pulsing clit.
‘Cillian, fuck’ you moaned as he continued to lick you. He took his time, slowly licking all of the surfaces of your clit.
Unlike most men you've been with, he knew what he was doing and you soon began to shudder and shake as he covered this territory.
After as little as ten minutes, you could feel yourself getting close to your high.
‘Cillian, don’t fucking stop’ you moaned as your hands held onto his head firmly as he continued to suck on your clit gently.
Your orgasm washed over you almost instantly and you lost all of your self-control while Cillian kept pushing your legs apart with his hands and stimulating your clit with his mouth.
Your legs wanted to give way shortly after you came down from your high and Cillian got off his knees quickly before pressing his lips onto yours in a haste, wanting you to taste your own juices that had pooled across his lips.
You moaned into his mouth while your hand reached between the both of you, running over his erection which was trapped beneath his tight jeans.
‘I am not done yet’ Cillian said as he moved your hand away from his crotch and pinned you back against the wall, kissing you again passionately.
While he was kissing you, he ran his hand over your wet mound, collecting your wet juices with his fingers before bring his finger up to your mouth.
You took his fingers into your mouth, licking them suggestively until he pulls them away from your mouth again.
Without words, his blue eyes starred into yours, full of want and desire and, without you noticing, his hand returned back in between your legs where he now, effortlessly, slid both of his fingers into your warmth.
You let out a loud moan, while Cillian looked at you, taking in your facial expressions. His lips were parted slightly as he observed your moans and you leaned forward to kiss him, but he wouldn’t allow it.
Within a few seconds, he found the magic spot inside of you and proceeded to tease it with his fingertips.
‘Holy Fucking Christ’ you screamed in shock. No one, not even yourself, had found this spot before and your legs were ready to give in right then and there.
‘Oh my god, stop…I mean don’t stop. Fuck, this is intense’ you said with laboured breathing as you starred at Cillian who responded with a satisfied grin.
‘Just relax and let go’ Cillian said before he pressed his lips back onto yours.
The pressure he used was gentle at first until he could feel you relax, which is when he increased his movements. You were already wet but, when his fingers massaged your g-spot, you began dripping on to the dark wooden floor.
‘Cillian, fuck fuck fuck, oh god’ you moaned as you felt a sensation you never felt run through your body. It was more intense than anything else you had ever experienced and, without being able to control yourself, you screamed loudly as your walls began to tighten around his fingers.
‘That’s it baby’ Cillian said as he watched your eyes close shut and listened to your loud moans while another orgasm washed over you.
As he did, he could feel a gush of wetness run over his hand and down to the floor, But you didn’t notice, you were in a trance, your legs were shaking by that point and you were entirely consumed by the most intense orgasm you ever had.
As you came down from your high, the wall behind you preventing you from collapsing to the floor, you looked at Cillian in disbelieve before noticing the puddle of clear liquid that had formed on the floor.
Cillian grinned, his tongue running over his lips suggestively as he watched your embarrassment.
‘Oh my god, what the fuck. This never happened before’ you said somewhat embarrassed when you noticed the puddle.
‘I am good then’ Cillian said before he pressed his lips back onto yours and wiped his hand on his jeans.
‘I am so sorry’ you said as your lips drifted apart, your mind filled with embarrassment about the mess you just made.
‘For this? Don’t be ridiculous’ Cillian said before kissing you again. ‘In fact, I think it’s sexy’ he added after your lips drifted apart.
‘Would you like to break in my new bed?’ you smirked as you took off the remainder of your clothes and indicating to Cillian to follow you.
‘It would be my pleasure’ Cillian smirked before he quickly kicked off his shoes and picked you up, remembering the location well from the last time he visited you.
As he held you against him and walked, you could feel his hardness pressing into you through his jeans and throbbing against your wet and naked mound.
He carried you to your bed and, with one swift movement, you found yourself with your back on the mattress.
As he took off his jeans and briefs all at the same time, Cillian couldn’t help but stare at your naked beauty, right there in front of him.
You could see his body respond as his hard member twitched and a few drops of precum escaped and fell to your bedroom floor.
You didn’t have to wait long for him to join you on the bed, hoovering over you and planting kisses over your body before meeting your lips again.
Then your lips were sucking and nibbling on his as he pulled away after each kiss, teasing you and occasionally your tongues would meet and fight each other.
No one ever kissed you quite like he did. It was intense and full of desire. Each kiss was different, new and exciting.
After your lips drifted apart again and while Cillian once more tried to take control, directing you to the position he wanted you in, you pushed him beneath you instead, catching him by surprise.
‘Do you have condoms?’ you asked as he was lying beneath you, thinking that you should have thought about this much earlier.
‘What happened to the ones from last time?’ Cillian asked as his hands continued to trail over your body, paying particular attention to your breasts.
‘They are in Kurt’s desk which is now in Kurt’s office’ you said, causing Cillian to laugh.
‘I can get dressed and walk to the shop. It isn’t far’ Cillian suggested before letting out a deep sigh knowing that his erection would defiantly not come down if he had to walk to the shops.
‘I am on birth control and, after Kurt, I just had all of my check-ups done’ you said, causing Cillian to nod in agreement before trying to take charge once again. But you wouldn’t budge and held him down against the bed playfully.
‘You really don’t like to give up control, do you?’ you grinned, causing Cillian to respond with a quiet chuckle.
‘No, but I am willing to try if you manage to tame me’ he winked jokingly before trying to pull you closer for another kiss.
‘I think I might just have the right thing for you Mr Murphy’ you grinned as you pulled away and reached for your bedside table.
From your bedside table, you pulled out a pair of leather handcuffs and held them up suggestively.
‘Do I get to use them on you some time?’ Cillian chuckled before he willingly put his hands above his head, ready for you to tie him against the metal frame of your bedhead.
‘Maybe’ you smirked as you secured the cuffs against his wrists and the bedhead, leaving him completely at your mercy.
By this time, the windows of your bedroom had become foggy, with precipitation running down the inside of them and the room was starting to smell like two people in heat, lust filling the air.
With Cillian’s wrists tied to the bedhead, you were now the one who hoovered over Cillian, planting kisses over him and rubbing your wet folds over his upper thighs suggestively. Random drops of his precum were caught by your skin and you got intermittent glimpses of his cock, still rigid this whole time.
He hated and loved the way you were teasing him all at the same time until, finally, you made your descent over his perfectly shaped chest and stomach and all the way down towards his hard member.
Cillian inhaled sharply as he watched you lick his precum of his cockhead, using your tongue only.
He pulled on his restraints, desperate for you to take his rigid member into your mouth as you continued to tease him with only small licks.
‘Patience’ you whispered before, finally, you took all of him deep into your mouth, making him groan loudly as he bottomed out in your throat.
Whilst your hands paid attention to his balls, you began to bob your head up and down before taking his hard shaft into one of your hands and licking around his tip only.
After about ten minutes, Cillian’s breathing soon became laboured and you knew that he was getting close as you could feel his cock pulsate inside your mouth.
‘Fuck Y/N’ he moaned until, eventually, your motions came to a halt and you shifted your body back up towards his until your lips met his once again.
While you exchanged a passionate kiss, you swung one leg over Cillian’s waist and reached between you, holding his hard shaft and carefully guiding it inside you.
‘Jesus’ was all that escaped him after your lips drifted apart and you lowered yourself onto him, taking inch by inch of his cock inside of you until you sat flush against him.
‘Hmm yes’ you moaned as you could feel all of him inside of you, stretching you and filling you completely.
‘Fuck you feel good’ Cillian moaned, trying to pull against his restraints in order to touch you. But his efforts were futile.
His warm cock felt amazing inside you and, once you adjusted to his size, you began to move, up and down, backwards and forwards.
You flicked your head back, riding him fast and hard. His breath was laboured and it was obvious to you that he was enjoying it, no longer trying to get out of his restraints.
‘God damn Y/N’ Cillian groaned as he watched your breasts bounce slightly up and down with every movement and it wasn’t long until your fingernails dug down into his chest, leaving some visible marks.
‘Come inside me’ you moaned, turned on by the thought of it and this was all he needed to hear in order to let go completely.
‘I am so fucking close’ you moaned and Cillian groaned in sync with you as he tried to thrust back up into you despite the restraints.
‘Fuck Y/N’ he moaned again, his cock beginning to throb inside of you and, just as he groaned once last time, you screamed his name as your third orgasm washed over you.
Cillian and you came together, in sync, and your walls contracted just as he filled you with his warm cum.
After you rode out your orgasm, you slowly uncuffed him before lifting your body up slowly, allowing his cock to slide out of you.
You could feel his cum leak from your core and down your thigh as you got up.
‘Oh wow’ you grinned sheepishly as you noticed the large amount of cum on your core and thigh.
‘Yeah sorry, it’s been like a week’ Cillian chuckled but you didn’t mind at all and collected some of it with your finger. You brought your finger to your mouth, licking it suggestively.
Your actions caused Cillian to raise his eyebrows and stare at you in disbelieve.
‘Well, I wanted to see what you taste like’ you smirked before you collapsed next to him.
You curled up against Cillian’s chest while he wrapped his arms around you, his fingers gently tracing over your back.
You pulled the sheets over you, feeling the cold air passing through the room, the heat of Cillian’s naked body radiating to yours.
‘I don’t really want to get up’ Cillian said, half covered by your sheets, starring at you with his deep blue eyes.
‘Then don’t. Stay here tonight’ you smiled before pulling him close for another kiss.
‘It’s only 8 o’clock Y/N. I probably should go’ Cillian said, causing you to pout.
‘I could order some chinese and a bottle of wine…we can watch a movie and then we can fuck again’ you suggested, causing Cillian to laugh.
‘I didn’t think that you could handle any more’ Cillian chuckled as he could see the exhaustion on your face.
‘Oh trust me, I can’ you said.
Cillian reluctantly agreed and you got up from beneath the sheets to get your phone to place the order.
Luckily, your apartment was a loft style studio penthouse and your large bed was in the middle of the large room, right in front of your flat screen TV.
‘What do you want to watch?’ Cillian asked as he flicked through the movies on Netflix and you finally agreed on a scary movie you had heard about from your sister.
But, neither of you paid much attention to the rather horrible movie. You enjoyed your chinese food and wine and joked, talked about almost anything and everything until, finally, the credits came on.
‘That was terrible’ Cillian laughed and you agreed and apologised for your choice of movie.
‘At least the main actor was hot’ you giggled as you got up and placed the chine food containers into the bin in your kitchen area.
‘Do you want me to introduce you?’ Cillian chuckled.
‘Nah, I don’t get involved with actors’ you said as you sneaked back under the covers. You were both still completely naked, covered by the doona.
‘Is that right?’ Cillian laughed before his lips crashed back onto yours and you quickly found yourself beneath him.
‘I can’t believe you can actually go again’ you said delighted as you could feel his hard member poke against your upper thigh, causing Cillian to chuckle.
‘Well, I am in bed with a very sexy woman…one who doesn’t get involved with actors apparenty….so maybe I should leave’ Cillian joked as he ran his hand through your hair gently.
‘I will make an exception for you’ you smirked just before Cillian got up from the bed and walked to your bathroom ensuite.
Seconds later, he returned with a large white towel and placed it onto the bed, causing you to look at him with surprise.
But, before you could put any more thought to it, he kneeled on the bed and took your legs, putting them over his shoulders.
‘Uhm…’ you said, somewhat surprised by his choice of position and, before you could say anything else, he interlaces your fingers with his and you felt the head of his cock rest against your entrance.
Cillian shifted his hips back and forth, running the length of his shaft and head over your wet folds and then pushed the head into your already soaking entrance.
You take a deep, shuddering breath as you felt his swollen cockhead push your lips aside and stretch you.
Your walls relaxed while you felt even more wetness flowing from you as Cillian gently pressed forward and you could feel your walls stretch around him once again.
Cillian leaned forward, bending at the waist while he entered you slowly and fully until he bottomed out inside of you and there it was again, this unfamiliar feeling.
You let out a loud moan as you could feel the tip of his cock press against your g-spot which was when you began to realise why he chose this position and why had placed a towel beneath you.
‘You are so fucking beautiful’ he whispered while you watched as he started to pull out again almost all the way before pushing back in and pausing when his cockhead hits your g-spot again.
‘Cillian, oh god’ you moaned as, with some subtle movements of his hips, he rubbed the head against your g-spot, making your fingers and toes curl.
Then he pulled out again almost all the way as he waited a few seconds for you to swell tighter. During that time, he ran his fingertips up and down your thighs and gave you grin before he started thrusting back into you again. He was slow and gentle, similar to when he his fingers first stimulated your sweet spot.
Once Cillian felt you relax completely and give in to the sensation of being penetrated this way, his thrusts became more forceful and fast.
The temperature of your apartment had increased significantly as sweat starts pouring down your bodies. Your juices once again started dripping from you and down his shaft. Your wetness was pooling underneath you two.
Cillian watched your toned stomach muscles flex as you cannot stay still as he reached down to rub your clit in circles, clockwise and counterclockwise while continuing his thrusting. Your breathing, which had started to become irregular, was now erratic. He smiled and enjoyed watching your breasts jiggle everywhere as you squirmed, trying to hold still.
Most of your body has now become a little numb, and as you felt him pulse and throb deep inside you and hear him moving in and out of your wetness, your eyes start glazing over a bit and rolling back into your head.
And then the intense feeling started again, at the top of your head. You couldn’t completely explain it and it was the most calm, relaxing feeling but with an undercurrent of tension that just gradually builds as that feeling flows over your face, neck, breasts, stomach, arms, and legs. When the feeling hit between your legs, your walls clamped down as hard as they could on his thick shaft.
‘Cillian, fuck…please don’t stop’ you moaned and with a loud cry, your body began to shiver, quiver, shake, bend, shudder, and contort as a multiwave orgasm rolled through you. Each wave feeling like a lightning bolt from head to toe as your tension lessened with each episode. Cillian pinned you down as you could not possibly stay still as he watched you writhe in ecstasy.
You almost blacked out as your whole body couldn’t stop coming. Just like the last time when Cillian massaged your g-spot, the pool of juices beneath you had quickly become a puddle and you could soon feel his balls swell up against your mound.
When your walls tightened around him, you could feel his cum rising within his shaft just before, with one loud groan, he filled you again with his warm seed.
Small tears fell from your eyes as you finally came down from your high and Cillian carefully pulled out of you, allowing you to rest your legs on the mattress.
‘Fuck Y/N, are you alright? I didn’t hurt you, did I?’ Cillian asked as soon as he noticed your teary eyes and flushed face.
‘No, it was just…’ you said as you took a deep breath before continuing your sentence. ‘It was very fucking intense’ you said, your breath heavy.
‘In a good way I hope’ Cillian chuckled before pressing his lips onto yours.
‘In the best way’ you giggled before you curled up against him.
After several gentle kisses and your hands roaming each other’s bodies, you eventually both drifted off to sleep.
***The Watch***
The following morning, you were both woken up by Cillian’s phone ringing at 8 o’clock. It was Kurt and he was persistent after Cillian didn’t pick up the first time.
Half asleep, with your head still resting on his chest, he answered the phone and talked to him.
‘Hey Kurt, what’s up?’ Cillian asked as he was waking up slowly while you began to trace your fingers over Cillian’s chest, playing with the little bit of chest hair.
‘I got the schedule last night and wondered whether you want to talk about it’ Kurt said politely just as Cillian wiggled around, stretching himself while you planted small kisses over his chest and down towards your stomach.
‘Uhm, talk…yes’ Cillian said as he raised an eyebrow when he noticed that you disappeared beneath the doona, your hands running over his upper thighs.
‘Could you come to my office in an hour?’ Kurt asked as Cillian took in a deep breath as your hands ran over his hardening cock.
‘Fuck’ was all that escaped him as he suddenly felt your warm lips wrapped around his base and he instantly went completely hard in your mouth.
‘Cillian?’ Kurt asked surprised by Cillian’s response.
‘Yes…fuck…sorry…9 o’clock?’ Cillian asked as he tried hard not to moan while you began to bob your head up and down, occasionally twirling your tongue over his head.
‘Yeah, if that’s alright?’ Kurt asked again, somewhat concerned by Cillian’s strange responses.
‘Yeah…’ Cillian responded before holding his breath, a deep groan stuck in his throat.
‘Can you call Y/N? She is being a fucking cunt not picking up my calls even though we need to work together on this’ Kurt complained.
‘Mhhm…’ Cillian said, pretending to listen to what Kurt was saying while you swallowed his length whole, moving your head up and down over and over again.
‘I actually think she is seeing someone’ Kurt went on to say as you ran your tongue piercing up and down Cillian’s shaft.
‘Aha’ Cillian responded trying to hold back his release, so close to coming.
‘I have to go man’ Cillian barely managed to say as your hands wrapped around his tight balls.
‘See you soon’ Kurt said before hanging up and just as he did a loud groan fell from Cillian’s lip.
‘Fuck Y/N’ he moaned just as his shaft pulsated heavily and he filled your mouth with his warm and sweet cum.
You looked up from beneath the doona, opening your mouth slightly and suggestively before swallowing all of it with a grin.
‘So, what did my ex want?’ you asked sheepishly, causing Cillian to chuckle.
‘You are so fucking bad’ he laughed before pulling you close for a kiss and telling you about the meeting.
‘You didn’t last very long despite your conversation with Kurt’ you giggled as you jumped up, walking towards the shower.
‘What can I say, blow jobs are my weakness especially coming from someone so talented’ Cillian smirked before he grabbed you from behind, kissing your neck and following you to the shower.
‘But, that’s not to say that we can’t keep going in the shower’ he grinned and so you went, spending twenties minutes making love while streams of hot water ran over your bodies.
After you came out of the shower and starred into the mirror you noticed that both, Cillian and you, were covered with small little bruises, scratches and bite marks.
You never quite had a night like this with anyone before and you weren’t ashamed. Nonetheless, you opted for a turtle neck jumper and some tight jeans.
Cillian had no choice but to wear the clothes he wore the night before, including the pair of jeans which had some obvious stains.
‘Sorry’ you chuckled as you noticed the stains.
‘Don’t worry. I’ll throw them in the wash and they’ll be grand’ he chuckled before you both walked to his car.
Ten minutes later, you arrived at Kurt’s office together and you felt the need to explain to him that your car broke down and Cillian was kind enough to offer to pick you up.
Kurt wasn’t suspicious by the fact that you arrived together, nor was he suspicious about the little bruises on Cillian’s neck. It was something else that, during your meeting with him, caught his attention and this was Cillian’s watch. It looked awfully familiar.
An hour into your meeting, rewriting half of the schedule because of Kurt being difficult and Cillian continuing to argue with him, Amanda and Jeremy arrived as well to finalise the advertising campaign for the music part of the festival.
Immediately, as soon as Amanda walked into Kurt’s office, she pulled Cillian aside.
‘Where the fuck were you last night?’ she asked quietly but everyone heard it, causing Jeremy to laugh.
‘I don’t think I have to answer that Amanda’ Cillian responded with some irritation before taking the paper schedule off Kurt and walking to the utilities room. Of course, she noticed the small bruises on his neck. It was obvious to her that he’s been with another woman.
You and Jeremy followed Cillian knowing very well that, the last time he tried to use the copier in the utilities room, he almost broke it and one of the administration assistants had banned him from ever touching it again.
As you were gone, Kurt had time to speak to Amanda in private.
‘I think I have an idea as to where Cillian may have been last night’ he chuckled, catching Amanda’s interest.
#cillian murphy#Cillian Murphy x Reader#cillian murphy smut#cillian murphy imagine#cillian murphy x you#cillian murphy x y/n
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Title: What the Heart Wants
Pairings: Young!Shota Aizawa x GN!Reader
Summary: You were a young hero in training, living in the United States. And when your high school offered an exchange internship to one of the hero agencies in Japan, you were first in line. But the last thing you expected was to fall for another of their young hopefuls.
Notes: Story features the other dumbigos as well. It’s implied that this story is just the reader reminiscing, and that the reader and Aizawa have been in an established relationship ever since.
Warnings: Mention of blood and a little battle damage, otherwise just superpowered teenage friends being pretty wholesome honestly.
My Masterlist
——————————
The first time you’d ever met the now pro hero Eraser Head, he hadn’t been much more than another teenager in over their head so much like yourself.
Back then you hadn’t known how to say no to anything either. While most of your classmates had been taking the typical internship offers from your state’s local hero agencies, you’d heard about a new exchange program abroad. And of course you’d jumped at the opportunity, anything to set yourself even one hair’s edge above the amazing competition.
Your Japanese had been terrible too honestly, so much so that you’d almost been afraid to speak for fear of ridicule once you reached Japan.
Luckily, the hero you were assigned to, Stunner Man was fluent in several languages. And his quirk was something akin to fireworks from his body at will, like a human flash bang. It greatly complimented your own quirk of consuming light energy to then expel it as energy blasts as well.
For the first few jobs together, you’d likely grown too confident and complacent because of this. It was all too easy to replace your own energy by drawing in that light from his fireworks. Sometimes to the point that all around you went dark, before then expelling the energy again as concentrated blasts from your hands to help incapacitate the small time villains you both ran across.
But then had come that rainy night and reports of a much stronger villain taking out actual teams of heroes somewhere downtown. Multiple agencies had responded to this of course, but your hero had been adamant about you staying behind. This was real danger he said, and it would be unheroic to let your desire for success blind you to your own inexperience. You would be a liability in the main battle, and you could be just as valuable assisting firemen and police in their efforts to evacuate the nearby apartment buildings instead.
Of course you were obedient, and so there you’d been, running up the stairs and through the corridors as fire alarms blared and people cried in panic in these high rise buildings. You’d put on your best act of confidence, directing the scared people to exits, asking them to mind their neighbors. You told them not to push, to please help those that were elderly or disabled, and that it would all be all right. Surely it would be because so many pro heroes were now on the job.
But just as you were almost done clearing the last floor at the top of that building, a terrible crash had sounded from far down the hall. Maybe debris breaking through from the nearby battle? You were cautious enough though to make sure that the police and firemen safely exited this floor entirely with the last civilians before you went to investigate.
You would make sure no one was left behind, that no one was hurt or trapped. But as you’d rounded the corner, in a glitter of broken glass and blood, that was where you’d first seen Shota Aizawa…Eraser Head.
He was only a sidekick you thought immediately though just from his age, so similar to your own. Yet he was already trying to get back to his feet even as you called out to him. The hole he’d come through in the large windows and the cracked wall around it were letting the rain now blow fiercely inside.
“Get back!” He’d yelled right back to you in Japanese however. As if he wasn’t losing blood all over the floor as you did pause brief enough to hear an odd humming sound outside even over the rain.
It was reflex of course. He hadn’t even been facing you, but the way he tensed you’d assumed what was going to happen only that fraction of a second before it did. Before whatever villain had just thrown him through this window attacked again, you’d used your energy reserves to make a shield of light between Shota and the broken windows and wall.
The blast that came through the hole had likely been intended to finish the boy. As it was, it still exploded violently against your force field, the recoil sending pain through your arms as you’d dug your boots into the floor beneath you as much as you could just to keep from being knocked backwards with the force.
You wouldn’t be able to take another direct strike like that without gathering more energy. And in the confusion as the blast did dissipate, you ran forward, grabbing the boy by the wrist. “Come on!”
You only saw the surprise in his reddened eyes for just a moment, the first time he’d really looked at you. His shaggy black hair was dripping on you from the rain before you both ran together.
“It’s going to get dark. Just hold on to me and trust me!” You spoke as you pulled your goggles down from off your head to cover your eyes in mid run. The goggles were a support item developed especially for you. In darkness you could switch between night-vision and thermal imaging to allow you to still see when your opponents and even teammates could not. And when you used your light abilities to discharge energy again, the opacity of the lenses darkened instantly to keep you from being blinded by the brightness of your own quirk as well.
As you both ran, you activated your quirk to draw energy from the artificial lighting in the hallway. True to your word, the whole hall became almost pitch black in short time. Your skin darkening to an inhuman shade as well as you used your power, a color akin to the lightless void now around you as you led him to a stairwell in the center of the building.
“Will the villain follow us in?” You asked as you closed the door, but making sure not to absorb all the light of the stairwell as well as you could still hear people making their way down to evacuate below. You knew you couldn’t stay in this place long. You had to protect these people you had already been trying to rescue as well. But information was always crucial to having a better chance at victory, and you needed anything that the boy could tell you quickly now.
As you lifted your goggles back up in the light of the stairwell, you were already trying to assess his wounds as well. But when you realized he was just staring at you, you finally made eye contact with him again just before he spoke.
“He’s more powerful out in the open.” The boy said. “So I don’t think he’ll follow us inside yet. But you’re assuming I’m a hero?” He sounded somewhat surprised? But the way he was looking you over, he was also trying to discern your quirk even in his own confusion.
“You told me to get back when I found you in the hallway, even though you were hurt.” You saw now that most of the blood was coming from his lower abdomen. A puncture wound maybe? “Who else would worry about others even when being attacked themselves?”
You saw his eyes widen a little at the sort of compliment, but you kept on. “And I’m sorry if I’m hard to understand. My name is (Y/N). I’m from the United States. Part of the intern exchange. I’m working for Stunner Man right now.”
“I can understand you.” He admitted. Though still looking at you in that odd way. “My name is Shota Aizawa.” He paused, seeming a little less confident, before he admitted his nickname. “Codename Eraser Head. I’m interning from the UA with His Purple Highness.”
“Oh,” You said, impressed truthfully, as that school’s hero course was obviously world renowned. But from the quizzical look you couldn’t help but show at his codename, he clearly had already discerned your next question.
He answered before you could ask, but even as he did you could tell he was already steeling himself for your disappointment. “I can erase others’ quirks just by looking at them.”
“You can…what?” You stared helplessly, for a moment almost forgetting your training to always be cool and collected as you tried to fathom what on earth this boy could really mean.
But he just stared back at you, was he that surprised at your reaction?
When he said nothing more, you had to shake away your shock to press further. “I’m sorry. This might be the language barrier again, but I need you to explain that to me please.”
Hero work could lead to unexpected team up situations at any time. And if this was to be one of those times, you both needed to know what you would be dealing with.
He frowned slightly, like he was having to talk more about himself than he was comfortable with. But he did comply. “If I activate my quirk while someone is in my direct line of sight, it inactivates theirs. But I can only do it for so long. Once I blink, or the line of sight is broken, their powers will come back.”
Silence hung between you for one long moment after his admission, and you could sense the tangible unease building in him.
You didn’t mean to make him jump either when you just blurted out. “That’s amazing!”
You still didn’t yell, but it was loud enough to be unexpected. But you couldn’t help it. You’d never heard of such a quirk. How could anyone be so powerful to make someone else quirkless just by looking at them!?
And why the hell did he look so self conscious about this? “You can’t be this modest. How are you not believing me that this is amazing!? I bet you only got thrown in here then because the rain obscured your vision, right!?” Your voice was quickening with your excitement. Your strategies to victory also readily multiplying in your brain. You could make a shield of light to push away the rain and Shota could look at the villain to make them helpless, then you could take them out with a subsequent light blast!
“My quirk has no offensive merit.” He deadpanned.
“Not every quirk has to!” You retorted, but maybe yourself now finally starting to understand a hint to his self conscious nature. “There are always multiple ways to win! Don’t they teach you that at UA?”
“We need to get moving,” He grumbled still in resistance to this subject. “People could be being killed out there.”
He wasn’t wrong you knew, as you nodded. “I’m sorry. I was just trying to gather information.” Which fair was fair as you tried to keep your own explanation as straight forward as you could.
“As you saw, my quirk is that I can absorb visible light energy. It doesn’t matter what kind. I darken everything as I absorb the light around me. I can store it inside myself, then discharge it when I’m ready, to make force fields for defense…or light blasts for offense or distraction to blind opponents.” Like everyone though, there was always still a catch as you continued. “But the weakness is that once I’ve discharged what I have, I’m tapped out until I can absorb more light. Which, at night in a rainstorm like this…there’s not much to be had.”
He was mostly stone faced as he listened to you though. But there was an analytic sharpness to his eyes, like you were inputting information into a human calculator before abruptly he tried to walk back away from you as if to continue up the stairs.
“I have a plan then,” He announced quietly, his back already to you again.
As much as you somehow believed him already though, you grabbed his hand before he could get much farther. “And whatever that plan is, we still won’t be much help to anyone if you faint from blood loss.”
It was obvious he was someone not used to being touched, you could tell that from the instant way he stilled and looked back at you.
But you didn’t weaken at the stare, only offering him a slight smile. “I’ve been trained in emergency first aid as well. There are first aid kits all through this stairway.” You’d passed them on the way up. “I’ll be quick, alright?”
————————————
The logical side of him must have won out that night in that stairwell. He’d known you were right about at least stopping his bleeding. But that was the real beginning you thought. This odd relationship that would keep its hold on you both for so many years to come.
Him, still so skinny then and self conscious, quiet and awkward as he’d sat on one of the stairs, holding his shirt up so you could clean and disinfect the wound just above his belt while you kneeled in front of him. Luckily the injury was not as deep as it could have been. Just too wide to close or clot on its own as you’d wrapped his abdomen with the appropriate bandages after cleaning out the debris.
And you kept your word, you still weren’t negligent of your duty as a hero in training even then. You didn’t waste any time at all, being as quick and efficient as you could while working on him. But even if all your training told you to also keep your mind on the mission at hand, you’d still felt that warmth in you.
The intimacy was practical, professional. But it still had its effect as you’d run your fingers across his abdomen to finish securing the bandage. You felt him tremble just for the slightest moment, and then it was over. His shirt was back down and he was standing again.
He’d only muttered a quick “Thank you,” as you’d both headed for the roof to execute his plan.
And still only being teenagers then, the clumsiness of your yelling and waving to attract the villain’s attention again would be something you’d both have been embarrassed about now. But at the time, you’d really both done rather well considering your low experience levels.
That villain of course hadn’t been the only villain that night. The main heroes had had their hands full with the other, stronger one at the heart of downtown. This one had been more like the sidekick really, just trying to keep on the outskirts to run interference and keep even more heroes from joining the fray for his boss.
He’d picked off Shota earlier he thought, so he was easy to get worked up when he realized Aizawa was now back for more.
But that villain had drawn his power from the difference of electrical charges in the air. Obviously then at an even greater advantage over the two of you with the thunderstorm above. But the trick had only been avoiding his electrical blasts, but drawing the light energy from them enough times to eventually surprise him with a big enough blast in return.
There’d been a few miscues of course, as well as you using your shielding to protect Shota all the while trying not to get hit either before you could finally land that big enough return hit to stun the villain. Then Shota binding him up in his scarf like weapon and removing the enemy’s quirk long enough to deliver a decisive knockout kick to the villain’s head.
It was your first ever victory as a team.
—————————————
And it’d been a bit of a whirlwind afterward. The congratulations and acknowledgement from your respective heroes for the small, but positive role you had both played of course. But more personally for you, you had owed so much to one of Shota’s best friends you had met immediately in the hustle and bustle afterward.
Oboro Shirakumo, otherwise known as Loud Cloud had been there immediately, ecstatic to hear the story of Shota’s and your success. His extroverted and effervescent personality such a direct opposite to Aizawa’s quiet nature. But Oboro had been the one seemingly so excited to learn you were from the United States as well.
He’d insisted that he, Shota, and their fellow UA student and other best friend, Hizashi Yamada (codename Present Mic) show you the real young hero life in Japan before you would leave again in the coming weeks.
Without Oboro’s intervention, there was likely no way otherwise you would have gotten to see the shy Aizawa so many times again after that night.
As a group the four of you had gone to malls, out to eat, and to see the touristy sights you likely never would have gone to alone. They didn’t even make fun of your bad Japanese, well not seriously anyway. Hizashi did a few times, but in a way that had you laughing with him as he teasingly walked you through a few pronunciations you’d butchered yet again.
On your last night in Japan, you’d been feeling a little sad really though as you’d wished you had gotten to speak to Shota a little more one on one. Even though he’d accompanied you all on your excursions together in those few weeks, you still had noticed how little he really talked and how often he seemed to always be looking away from you.
In the end you just had to think you were being silly for the way you’d felt in the stairwell with him briefly that night and how often you’d thought of him ever since. You’d probably never see him again you knew.
That night though you’d all gone to a park together that met the beach and ocean. Oboro was insistent that you needed to see the view of the sea there before you flew back to the United States the next morning.
Oboro had made one of his clouds, taking just the two of you up high into the air. As Shota and Hizashi still on the ground grew smaller and smaller, you did look away to the horizon and the starlit ocean beyond. It was beautiful of course.
But what Oboro said next, made you forget all about that view entirely.
“He likes you you know. He just doesn’t know what to do about it.” The blue haired boy said as if it was as simple a truth as saying the sun would come up tomorrow.
Your head turned immediately, just to see Oboro smiling at you in an almost conspiring way. “And you feel the same don’t you?” He asked you. “You look at him the same way he looks at you.”
“He doesn’t look at me!” You blurted, stupidly protesting as if your stomach wasn’t already trying to tie itself into a knot.
But Oboro just laughed, that genuine, happy one you’d heard from him so many times already. “Well he knows what to do with his eyes doesn’t he? He has practice. Of course he doesn’t let you catch him staring!”
So many emotions ran through you at once then. Embarrassment at your naivety, sadness that you still had to be leaving the country regardless, shock that this could even be true, and….frustration that you would just be being told now!?
“I’m leaving tomorrow, Oboro. Why would you even tell me this now!?” You asked somewhat desperately, but still keeping your voice down in your escalating panic.
He raised his hands innocently, yet unafraid of you either way. “Hizashi and I have been encouraging him as much as we could to speak up, but Shota is like those stories where an unstoppable force meets an immovable object…but in this story both are Shota!”
You stared, the absurdity only mounting at his words.
He chuckled, looking a little embarrassed then. “He’s quite stubborn is what I mean? And he says it’s pointless because you’ll be thousands of miles away. And I said that’s what phones, email, and video calling are for! Of course conversation is not one of his better skills…”
“Oh, man” You sighed, yet trying to think in your nervousness. “Did he send you to tell me all this? Or does he even know we’re having this conversation right now?”
The boy just shook his head. “He didn’t tell me to, and I didn’t ask his permission, no. He would have only told me not to. But sometimes heroes have to do what heroes have to do, right?” A kind look overtook his face again. “I want to see him smile sometime. He actually has a nice smile you know. I think I’ve seen it all of twice,” Oboro joked.
And it was true, it’s not like Shota was cruel or anything. But he didn’t smile, he didn’t laugh. It was like he was always afraid to perhaps. You weren’t really sure yet. You hadn’t known him long enough. But surely Oboro and Hizashi had. You should at least be able to trust that they had made a correct assessment of their friend’s feelings.
“Well…” You hesitated. “If I told him I wanted to stay in contact…do you think he’d actually call or write me?” You looked at Oboro imploringly, unsure if it would hurt more to try this and be rejected later anyway if you still never heard from him again.
“I can only promise you that we’ll try to keep him from screwing up if it’s only his fear that’s holding him back. We all have to overcome fear in one way or another if we’re going to be pros one day.” He smirked then, before looking a little more boastful. “You know, when Shota, Hizashi, and I graduate, we’re going to start our own hero agency. I’m sure by then if you wanted to come and do some more work in Japan, we could make a space for you too. I’d be a bad manager to turn down foreign talent you know.”
He did seem so sincere, you couldn’t help but smile back at him. “I’ll talk to Shota. But, whatever happens, thank you for trying to help either way.”
Oboro gave an exaggerated thumbs up with, what honestly you were guessing was his best imitation of an All Might type grin. “Of course! Plus Ultra! Always!”
———————————
It was something how quickly Oboro and Hizashi got themselves out of sight, now just you and Shota on the beach together. Yet you suspected they may still be in earshot somewhere in the distance. No doubt painfully curious of how this would go and silently cheering their best friend on.
At first you were afraid that Shota was angry actually, the way he’d visibly bristled, shooting his friends’ quite unhappy stares before they’d left as he fully realized what was about to happen.
But he didn’t ignore you, nor did he look away from you this time as you got closer to hopefully speak a little more privately. “I’m sorry if this is…weird.” You started awkwardly. “But I don’t think you should be too hard on your friends either. It’s obvious they really care about you.”
Your foot was kind of shifting in the sand. Nervousness still flowing freely as you just kept on. “But I’d still like to hear it from you…if you’re wanting to keep in touch. If you want to get to know me better, I’d like that…so…um-” Ah, this would be awful at any time, but stumbling over words you’d only recently learned made it all the worse. “So is it true, Shota? Do you want to keep talking after I’m back home…maybe I can come back again though…I’d like to see you again…I really would.”
He was silent at first, but he was clearly listening. Intently, as if analyzing your every movement, your every word.
But it was painful how long you had to wait for a response. Surely it wasn’t really as long as it felt though before he finally responded. His voice surprisingly even, almost emotionless?
“You’ll be a successful hero if you keep to your studies and training. I find it unlikely that you wouldn’t be able to start at any agency of your choosing in the United States once you graduate.”
A huge compliment to be sure, as you stared at him in surprise. But what did that have to do with the subject at hand? Was he trying to avoid your questioning entirely?
Yet his eyebrows lowered before you could interrupt as he kept on. “So I don’t understand why you would ever want to come back to Japan longterm where your reputation would have to be built back up again just to get equivalent job offers to what you could attain already in the US. The one instance with capturing the villain at that apartment complex isn’t enough for top placement at the agencies here in Japan. Especially without UA accreditation on your record. You would be putting yourself at a disadvantage to be here. It would be a mistake for your career.”
You could swear you almost heard a groan from somewhere in the distance. If you’d put your goggles on now, you were sure you’d probably see Oboro and Hizashi hanging on every word, wherever they were hiding to eavesdrop in the dark.
But your brain was also quite busy trying to digest the most words you’d ever heard from Shota at one time. Was this his excuse to reject you more lightly? To say he was only thinking of your career?
Of course he was under no obligation to feel anything for you. You knew there were certainly those with more powerful or interesting quirks than your own, or people more physically attractive. You weren’t anything amazing in your own mind compared to all the potential superstars you interacted with on a daily basis back home.
Yet if he didn’t feel how you did, you wanted to hear it outright instead of buried in a confusing way like this, and you couldn’t help but admit so then. “So you think I shouldn’t ever want to date you because it could make me spend too much time in Japan and not become as famous as I could have been otherwise? Nice that you assume working at a top tier agency is the only thing I would care about for my future….”
Perhaps you did come across a little harsher than you intended, but the way his normally tired looking eyes suddenly widened in shock had you realizing you had definitely brought some sort of emotion out of him at last with those words.
“You…wanted to…date me?” He uttered the words as if he never would have expected that combination of syllables to ever leave his mouth.
Well, you never would have been so forward if you didn’t feel he forced your hand with that strange insinuation of saying your personal choices should all be tied to a need for future fame and fortune.
You put one hand on your hip, trying not to sound as dumb as he was making you feel in this moment. “Well, not like tomorrow or anything. We’d need to get to know each other some more of course. But yes, I thought about it a lot these last few weeks. But if you didn’t like me like that, then friends is fine. I was hoping that was what we were going to talk about here. If you…liked me like that or not.”
Oh Lord, was this high school like it should be or was this elementary playground kind of drama? You didn’t have enough experience to be any more adult about this. But it was a yes or no type of question wasn’t it? Either he felt some sort of interest and attraction like you did, or he didn’t. You just needed to know.
“I…think you’re talented. And capable.” He said, like it was taking so much just to do this.
It was maddening somehow though. Could he not just say he felt nothing if that was the case? Was he so afraid of hurting your feelings? But honestly, he didn’t seem the type to ever mince words either. “Shota…” You tried. “You know you don’t have to worry about sparing my feelings. All you have to say is that you’re not interested. I’m not some delicate flower.”
Yet, you were starting to feel guilty yourself. Maybe this was all wrong, trying to force him out of his comfort zone too much. You should just take a hint right?
When he still said nothing more, your stomach finally sank as you stepped back from him a little again. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to know the truth, so I didn’t have to worry wondering later. If I’m not your type that’s okay. I appreciate you taking the time to try and talk to me like this.”
Oboro must have been wrong. That was all it could be. His friends had seen something that wasn’t there, and then pushed it this far in a sincere, but misguided attempt to help their friend.
But the let down still hurt. In the span of a short time, Oboro had gotten your hopes up and then they’d crashed down again. You’d been able to admit your feelings to Shota, just for it to end up as one sided.
Or so you thought.
You started to walk away, not wanting to be further embarrassed if the disappointment in your face had really started to show.
But you froze as soon as you felt his shockingly quick hand grab around your wrist. The memory of you doing the same to him in the apartment complex flashed through your mind.
“I didn’t say you weren’t my type…not that I’ve had a type before.” He spoke, but not in his usual even tone as you looked back at him.
And that was likely the very first time you’d ever seen a little bit of fear in his expression. He was still holding your wrist tightly, but it was like he didn’t know what else to say. He didn’t know how to express whatever it was that he was really thinking.
“Eraser really is that bad at this! Just run with it, (Y/N)!” Hizashi’s voice boomed in the distance even if he was only partially using his quirk. The vibration startling you both as Shota immediately shot a death glare in that direction, his hair levitating as he activated his quirk as if trying to lock on to Present Mic even in the dark.
And you couldn’t help it then, slipping your wrist out of Shota’s grip at his distraction, but just as quickly clasping your hand warmly around his own instead as you used your quirk to absorb some of the ambient starlight. It created a dark spot on the beach between the two of you and the others, just enough that Oboro and Hizashi would no longer be able to see. Though Shota would still be able to see you as you chose to take a risk, leaning in enough to kiss his pale cheek.
His hair fell back down at that very personal touch, the red glow also leaving his eyes as he looked back to you.
But you couldn’t read him then. You weren’t sure at all what would happen.
Yet he was still human wasn’t he? Even as stoic and calculating of a person as you’d ever met, he was still human, and still young then with that touch of recklessness you all had deep down.
And when you felt his lips touch yours not long afterward, it was as clumsy as could be expected for teenagers. But you didn’t care at all as you easily returned the kiss.
You knew immediately then that you would be coming back to Japan as soon as you could. Your goal was still to be a pro hero, but it didn’t really matter where.
A true hero’s spirit came from the heart. And if your heart ended up in Japan…who were you to tell it no?
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(End for now. ❤️ I will likely write more of this pairing, but not sure of how soon. Thank you for reading!)
#shota aizawa#shouta aizawa#shota aizawa x reader#shouta aizawa x reader#shouta aizawa x you#shota aizawa x you#shouta x reader#eraser head#shouta x you#eraserhead#shouta x y/n#eraser head x reader#eraser head x you#my hero fanfic#my hero x reader#my hero academy fanfiction#my hero academia#my hero imagines
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