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inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 8 months

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Comet Donati [Chapter 10: Through The Dark] [Series Finale]

Series Summary: Sex, drugs, boy bands. You are a kinda-therapist recruited (via nepotism) to help Comet Donati through a recent crisis. Things are casual with Aegon, very not-casual with Aemond. Loosely inspired by One Direction.

Chapter Warnings: Language, references to sexual content (+18), drugs, alcohol, smoking, mental health struggles, pregnancy, bodily injury, death, miscarriage, AND NO OTHER CLUES, HAPPY READING!!! 🥰

Selected Chapter Quote: “What made you want to be a therapist?”

Word count: 6.4k.

Link to chapter list (and all my writing): HERE.

Taglist: @doingfondue @catalina-howard @randomdragonfires @myspotofcraziness @arcielee @fan-goddess @talesofoldandnew @marvelescvpe @tinykryptonitewerewolf @mariahossain @chainsawsangel @darkenchantress @not-a-glad-gladiator @gemini-mama @trifoliumviridi @herfantasyworldd @babyblue711 @namelesslosers @thelittleswanao3 @daenysx @moonlightfoxx @libroparaiso @burningcoffeetimetravel-fics @mizfortuna @florent1s @heimtathurs @bhanclegane @poohxlove @narwhal-swimmingintheocean @heavenly1927 @echos-muses @padfooteyes @minttea07 @queenofshinigamis @juliavilu1 @amiraisgoingthruit @lauraneedstochill @wintrr13 @r0segard3n @seabasscevans @tsujifreya @helaenaluvr @hiraethrhapsody

Thank you for loving the insane and incomparable Comet fam. I hope you enjoy the series finale. 💜

Night sky, string lights, reverberating bass, warm wet verdant air like the earth the dinosaurs knew, swampy and thick with beasts. With his lazy, dreamlike smile—a kind contagious glow, pink sunburned cheeks that match the clinking Salty Dog in his hand—Aegon says: “What made you want to be a therapist?”

You won’t tell him the whole truth. But you’ll tell him part of it. “Sigmund Freud.”

Aegon is intrigued, raised eyebrows and a crooked grin. “The guy who thinks everyone wants to fuck their mom?”

“You would have liked him. He did a lot of coke.” You take a swig of your Salty Dog: rosemary, grapefruit, the singeing bite of gin. “He was the founder of talk therapy. And, yeah, some of the things he wanted to talk about were…unorthodox. Misguided. But still…”

“He just wanted to talk,” Aegon says softly, understanding now.

“This was the turn of the century, okay? This was back in the days when they were pulling people’s teeth out, locking them up in asylums, injecting them with diseases, cutting off parts of women that made them unruly, ungovernable, immoral.” You shudder. “And Freud said no, just talk to them. Just figure out what demons they have chained up in their skulls, dark dusty corners buried way down deep, and help them figure out how to move forward. It’s not about having a cure, a pill or a scalpel. I mean, how ludicrous would that be, thinking I was walking around with some failproof silver bullet to make all the pain of existence vanish? That’s insane. It’s about listening to people, and caring about people, and shining a light on what part of them already knew was there. I don’t have a cure for anybody. Not a single goddamn person on this planet. But I can help them find their own.”

Aegon watches you, contemplates you, studies you like something rare and fleeting. “You are going to be one hell of a therapist.”

“I don’t know about that. But I hope so.”

“I’ll find you. Maybe when you’re done with school you can work on me. I’d keep you busy, I guarantee it. I’m like Disney’s Haunted Mansion. Ghosts everywhere you look.”

You laugh, shaking your head. “You are never going to remember me.” He is never going to remember this place, this time, the way he shared his light with me like a long-lost comet clipping by Earth.

“I might,” Aegon says. He sips his Salty Dog with his elbows propped on the table, his blond hair whipping in the indigo wind, grains of salt on his lips, reflections of string lights like stars in his eyes. “I really think I might.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Your arms thrown around his neck, your face buried in his black t-shirt, inhaling smoke and dust and the coppery sharpness of his spilled blood. You are sobbing uncontrollably, gasping, shivering, wild prideless tears and clawing fingers. Jace’s words circle in your skull like a moon around its planet: Nobody escapes the indignity of becoming a regret. Aemond is trying to calm you, to quiet you. His hands—large and dangerous and bloodstained and careful—are on your back, in your hair. You have to explain, to repent. You have to make him understand.

“I didn’t get pregnant on purpose,” you moan into him, a jagged rush like a hemorrhage. “I swear to God I didn’t. I wouldn’t do that to you. I wasn’t trying to trap you or fix you or use you. I’m in love with you, Aemond, I wanted you, and I still want you, and I thought you would hate me and I was terrified and I didn’t know how to tell you—”

“I don’t hate you, I could never hate you,” he’s saying, and more that you can’t catch; his words are a tide, flowing in and fading out. Now there is pain, deep and sharp and collapsing. Aegon is standing a few yards away, tears flooding down his sunburned face; they clear tracks in the dust that coats him, that coats everyone, that sticks to the blood on your legs. Cregan has pushed the others back, but still, you can hear their incorporeal voices: Jace asking what’s going on, Rhaena explaining, Baela shrieking, Criston shouting orders. Now Aegon has a rough hand on Aemond’s shoulder and is telling him something—insisting upon something—but you don’t know what. Language escapes you; language abandons you.

There are sirens and flashing lights the color of rubies, roses, tangled arteries. Aemond scoops you up and carries you towards them. There is only enough room for one person to ride in the ambulance with you; there is no discussion of who it will be. The rest of Comet has to wait for the Escalades to arrive at your parents’ farm. You do not try to steal a glimpse of the damage, felled trees and scattered fence posts, dead cattle and pillaged earth. You are filled with enough wreckage already; you are built of it, bones made out of bent nails, nerves of barbed wire.

Needles into your arms, chemicals into your bloodstream: something that deadens the pain and muddies your thoughts, makes them slow and heavy and unpanicked, like you are watching this happen to somebody else. In an exam room, nurses strip your clothes away and wipe the red from your skin, routinely, absentmindedly, as if it is of no consequence, as if the future you had taken for granted has not just been drowned, immolated, eradicated from existence like a dying star. They give you underwear fitted with a bulky postpartum pad—the same used by mothers of living children—and a hospital gown that Aemond marks with bloody fingerprints when he touches you. Then the nurses leave you to wait for the doctor with your IVs and your fogbank mind and your glazed eyes that stare blankly at the sterile white walls.

Aemond is smoothing back your hair from your face, and you are reminded of how he held Aegon when he was dying on your bedroom floor in the MGM Grand. You remember once thinking that Aemond is like storms and rogue waves, and that’s true; he turns lethal and then goes kind again, strikes and then soothes. He says once you are alone, each word painstakingly chosen: “I’m sorry that because of how I’ve acted, you felt you couldn’t tell me.”

“I’m sorry I lost the baby.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. I must have. I’m bleeding too much.” You can feel it, blood and clots that ooze, gush, drain away leaving you cold and hollow.

The exam room door opens, not a nurse or a doctor but a man in khaki cargo shorts and a filthy neon green tank top and matching Crocs, clop clop clop. “Hey, Stargirl,” Aegon says, sad and gentle. He holds up a venti-sized plastic cup. “I brought you a Double Chocolatey Chip Frappuccino.”

You blink groggily, not knowing what to do with it. Aegon puts the clear cup in your hands, the green straw between your lips. It’s sugary, cold, rich, topped with a swirl of whipped cream and chocolate syrup. It brings you back a little bit, a few unsteady steps towards the real world.

“Where the fuck is the doctor?” Aemond asks him.

“The nurse said she’s on her way. They’re understaffed.” Aegon shrugs apologetically: Missouri bullshit.

“You get somebody in here, right now.”

“What do you want me to do, threaten to stab medical professionals?! How about you punch some of their teeth out, I bet that would help.” Then Aegon sighs shakily and covers his own face with his hands. “It wasn’t…it wasn’t mine, you know?” Wasn’t, isn’t, will never be. “We haven’t…not since…it’s not…” He looks at Aemond with large, shining, ocean-blue eyes. “It’s not possible. You have to know that. You can’t be the way that you are sometimes. You don’t get a few weeks to come around to doing the decent thing. You have to believe her.”

And Aemond says softly: “I do.”

The door opens again and a doctor steps through it, mid-forties, thick black-rimmed glasses, dark hair secured in a businesslike low bun. Aegon ducks out of the room; the doctor gives him a brief quizzical glance before introducing herself to you. You can’t seem to latch onto her name. You answer the questions she asks you as she readies the ultrasound machine: ten weeks along, blunt force trauma to your back, where and how it hurt before the pain was drugged out of you. She unfastens a tie on the side of your hospital gown and opens it just enough to spread the cool gel across your belly and then glide the transducer through it. She peers at the grainy screen. She’s checking for a heartbeat; she’s checking to see if you’ll need a D&C to help expel a partial miscarriage so you don’t go septic.

“I lost it,” you sob, breaking down again. “Aemond, I’m so sorry—”

“Don’t. Please don’t.” He kisses your temple and then rests his forehead against yours, tears glittering in his river-clear right eye.

“Well,” the doctor says with practiced, vaguely sympathetic composure. “You lost one of them.”

You look to her, not understanding. “One of…?”

She angles the monitor so you and Aemond can see. “Fraternal twins often have separate amniotic sacs and placentas. So depending on the positioning of the fetuses, it is possible to miscarry one but not the other. This one on the left here…” She indicates it with her index finger. “It’s…it’s no longer viable, unfortunately. You’ve already passed most of it. But this one on the right…” She squints at the screen, repositioning the transducer. “From what I can tell, it seems to be holding on. Let me see if I can…” She moves the transducer around, pressing it into the yielding flesh of your belly. And then you hear it: a fierce defiant drumming, a whistling like wind through leaves. “I thought so,” the doctor pronounces, smiling. “There’s the heartbeat. The pulse is approximately 155 beats per minute, which is typical.”

One of them? I didn’t lose one of them? “Aemond…?”

When you turn back to him, he’s staring at the flickering black-and-white whirls of bones and blood flow on the ultrasound screen. And the expression on his face is one that you’ve never seen from him before, serene like when he’s with animals, awed like when he studies the galaxy, and something else too, a great shifting, a clicking into place, tectonic plates and ocean currents and storm clouds unraveling into clear skies. “It’s alright?” he says, not taking his eye from the screen.

“It is,” the doctor confirms. “Measuring a little bit small for ten weeks, but that’s to be expected for a twin. I don’t think you’ll be able to tell the sex for another month, but it’s alive and well.” She freezes the image on the screen, sets the transducer aside, and cleans the gel from your belly. “Based on my experience, in cases like this, I’d say there’s a better than 50/50 chance the surviving fetus can be carried to term.”

You say: “What can I do…? I mean…there must be something I can do to help it…to help it live…”

“We’ll give you medication to stop any residual uterine contractions and antibiotics to prevent infection. I’d like to admit you for observation, just for a day or two. And I would recommend bed rest for several weeks. Until you’ve reached your second trimester, at least.”

“Yes. Anything. I’ll do anything.”

“And sir, you’re…” The doctor peers at Aemond through her glasses, really scrutinizing him for the first time, his brutal scar and his blind left eye and his stillness and his wonder. “You’re the father?”

Aemond nods, still gazing at the screen like a constellation in the night sky, like a comet only glimpsed once in a lifetime. “I am.”

The doctor beams. “Congratulations,” she tells both of you. And then she leaves to arrange for you to be admitted to the hospital.

“I’ll stay,” Aemond says. “When the band flies to New Orleans tomorrow, I’ll stay here with you.”

“No, Aemond.”

“I’m staying. I’m not going to leave you. You need me, the baby needs me.”

“No,” you say again. “What we have now is wrong. It’s painful and volatile and doomed.” You lay your palm against his scarred face, and he doesn’t finch away. “You have to figure out who you are after Comet. And so do I.” Tears in your eyes, tears on your cheeks; but on your lips is a soft, patient smile. “Aemond, I don’t want me and the baby to be a distraction from the work that you still desperately need to do. I don’t want to be a temporary fix. I don’t want to be your life raft. I want to be…if I’m going to be anything to you…” Your thumbprint ghosts across his cheekbone, tender, reverent. “I want to be your home.”

He shakes his head, but he doesn’t speak; drops like rain spill down his right cheek, dyed pink by blood from the fresh lacerations that riddle him, new scars and ancient pain.

“What are you thinking?” you say.

“I’m thinking that you’re right. I fucking hate it, but you are.” He swipes away tears with one bloodstained hand, then he settles it on your not-yet-showing belly, a place of ruin, a place of hope. “When can I come back?”

“When you’re ready. And only you’ll know when that is.”

The exam room door opens again, and your parents rush in like water through a cracked dam. They are frantic and fretting, peering around bewilderedly.

“Lord almighty, what the hell happened?!” your dad booms; and your mom doesn’t even think to chastise him.

“I’m okay, Daddy.”

“You got hit by somethin’? Are they gonna do an x-ray? Your mother and I finally made it back home from church, trees and power lines down all over the place, and that boy was waitin’ on the front porch to tell us where you were. You know, the big one. The one with the godawful ponytail.”

“Cregan,” your mom offers.

“Cregan,” your dad says.

“It’s a man bun, Daddy. How’s the farm?”

“We ain’t too bad off. A couple cows dead, half the herd out wanderin’ since the pasture fence blew away. Me and the dogs gotta bring ‘em on back, but your mother and I had to see you first. Did they check you over good? Can you come home today?”

“Sweetheart, there’s…” Your mom’s voice is alarmed. “There’s blood on your gown, on your face, what happened?”

“Well, I, um, the thing is…” You try to tell them. You begin crying again instead. As you sniffle and avert your eyes—afraid, ashamed—Aemond stands and extends one large, scarlet-streaked hand. Your dad shakes it tentatively. And then Aemond explains for you: the child you’ve lost, the child you’ve kept, what has to happen next.

“I am responsible,” Aemond says as they gape at him, half-ecstatic and half-horrified. “And I know that this didn’t exactly happen in the traditional way, and I know that there is a lot of work left for me to do to prove myself worthy of your daughter. But I hope in time you’ll be able to forgive me. Because it seems that we’re going to be family.”

Your mom squeals and hugs Aemond. Your dad hugs you. They stay until you are settled in your own private room—small bed and clean sheets, drugs trickling into your veins—and only then do they listen to your insistence that you’ll be okay until morning, that they need to go home to take care of the farm. They leave with their arms around each other, exchanging murmurs like vows. Then Aemond asks if you feel well enough to see the band. They want to say goodbye.

“You’ll miss me,” Jace says confidently, then swoops in to smack a kiss on your forehead before anyone can stop him, bouncing dark curls and smirking mouth. Aegon jabs him in the ribs, Criston rolls his eyes, Aemond glowers like he’d enjoy putting Jace in need of another 28 dental implants. “If you ever get sick of mentally ill blonds, just let me know. The kid doesn’t change anything. I dig MILFs.”

“Thanks, Jace. I guess.”

“We’ll still see you around, right? You’ll visit us, we’ll visit you?”

“Yeah. I won’t disappear.”

“Good.” And then again, more somberly: “Good.”

Rhaena is dabbing at her gentle, doe-like eyes with a Kleenex, leaning into Luke for support. Criston is gallant. Daeron is optimistic. Baela is exasperated that you told Rhaena you were pregnant but not her.

“I didn’t tell Rhaena,” you counter. “She just happened to be the person who accompanied me on my ill-fated adventure to procure Plan B in Tokyo at like 2 a.m.”

“Which did not work,” Rhaena adds, sniffling into her Kleenex.

“A cautionary tale,” Jace says to everyone. “You hear that, fellas? When in doubt, wrap it before you tap it.”

Baela nods at you. “Luckily, she doesn’t seem too disappointed.” Her eyes flick reticently to Aemond where he sits in the chair closest to your bed, a presence in the room like skies that could turn in an instant, quiet, preoccupied, protective, dazed. “And neither does he.”

“I’m not,” Aemond confesses. He laces one hand through yours and brings his lips to your knuckles, willing the baby to live, willing himself to be better for you both.

“We’re going to talk later,” Cregan tells him sternly. Talk about what it means to be a father.

“Yes,” Aemond agrees.

And then Cregan says goodbye to you too, his cool greyish eyes growing peculiarly warm, his steely exterior chipping away like flecks of old paint.

Aegon is last, the only person left in the room with you and Aemond. Grinning beneath sad eyes, he presses a hand to his heart, and then to yours, and then to your belly. Starboy, Stargirl, Starbaby. Then he says: “Do you want me to hide under your bed so they can’t kick me out when visiting hours end?”

You smile tiredly, exhausted and in pain, pain of the body and pain of the soul. “You have to go, Aegon. Thousands of screaming fangirls will be waiting for you at Arrowhead Stadium.”

He is stunned. “I can’t perform tonight, obviously.”

“Yes you can.”

“No, I definitely can’t.”

“You can,” you say. “You have to. And more than that, you want to. You’ll regret it if you don’t. You live for being Comet’s disaster playboy. I’m not going to take that away from you.”

And then Aegon whimpers: “You can’t leave me.”

“You’re leaving me first.” You beam up at him, caressing his sunburned face, threading your fingers through his disheveled hair. Aemond observes this with curiosity but no suspicion. “This isn’t goodbye, Aegon. I’ll see you again. You can add me to the long list of girls you FaceTime.”

He laughs. “Okay, Stargirl. Okay. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“For more than a day, right?”

“For all of them. Forever.”

And then he’s gone, riding that elliptical orbit out into all the corners of the world that he will glow for: New Orleans, Miami, Rio de Janeiro, Sao Paulo, Bogota, Buenos Ares, Lima, Santiago.

Aemond swears to you: “I’m coming back.”

“I hope so.”

And he tilts up your chin and kisses you, tasting like smoke and dust and blood and desire, and it takes every atom of you, every string of muscle and rusty speck of bone marrow, not to crumble and beg him to stay. You are still at war with the part of you that wants to surrender as he stands and walks out of the room. He does not look back; he can’t without losing his nerve.

In the night, he returns to you, long after visiting hours have ended. Perhaps hundreds of millions of dollars have a way of making formalities disappear. He is only a silhouette in shadows like dawn, dusk, midnight. Aemond climbs into the hospital bed and catches you as you fold into him, whispering to you that everything will be alright, telling you how sorry he is, lulling you into a fitful sleep against his chest, his warmth, his heartbeat. And in the morning when you wake up alone, you wonder if any of it was real.

Did I dream that he was here? Did I dream that I ever met him at all?

But no, he has left you proof, something tangible, permanent. On the nightstand is Aemond’s small square vintage lighter; Targaryen is etched into one side. And there is something else too, a single piece of black paper with two sentences of starlight-colored ink:

I’m coming back.

I love you.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s October, and the leaves are turning from emerald to topaz, garnet, tiger’s eye. You carve pumpkins with your parents on their front porch. You bake apple crisps and sweet potato pies. You feed the pigs, brush the Australian cattle dogs, buy baby supplies with Aegon’s Amex Black Card. You decide to let the grad student and her Giant Flemish rabbit keep your apartment downtown until your lease is up in the spring. You’d rather be here on the farm, even when you’re not on bed rest anymore. You’d rather be home.

You listen to Comet Donati, The Script, Coldplay, One Direction. Rhaena and Baela mail you boxes of crochet comets and stars and planets for the baby’s room. Aegon mails you boxes of Comet’s new donut-themed merch. Now your dad sometimes tends to the beef cattle in boy band t-shirts. Aegon FaceTimes you two or three times a week, sends WhatsApp messages nearly every day. But you rarely talk about Aemond. It’s too painful, it’s too much of a temptation. You cannot imagine others seeing him, hearing him, speaking to him without needing to do it yourself in the same way that you need oxygen and gravity.

The week before Halloween, you begin spotting. You sob hysterically as your mom drives you to the hospital, convinced that you’re losing this baby too, that everything you touch is damaged and defenseless and doomed. You’re fine, as it turns out, and the baby’s fine too, but even after you’re back at the farm you can’t stop shaking, can’t stop imaging the wet heat of blood on your thighs.

You break down and call Aemond. And you talk for five hours until the sun rises, you in a rocking chair on your parents’ front porch, Aemond on a hotel balcony in Santiago, Chile in the shadow of the Andes Mountains. He says he’s working on something, but he’ll come back now if you ask him to, he’ll board the jet and land in Kansas City in time for supper at the farm, and you can hear the backsliding desperation in his voice: Please ask me to come back. Please just fucking ask me.

But it’s not time yet. He’s not ready, and you both know it. You agree not to call each other again until Aemond returns to you. If he returns to me. Neither of you can sleep for days afterwards. Neither of you can open the door a crack without the other rushing through.

One morning you shuffle downstairs in your Cookie Monster pajama pants and oversized NSYNC t-shirt to find your dad eating a heap of homemade pumpkin waffles in front of the television in the den. All five Australian cattle dogs are perched expectantly at his feet. “Them boys of yours are on Good Morning America.”

“What? Really?”

Yes, they are; they’re celebrating the conclusion of their record-breaking world tour and teasing a new album with an interview and two songs. You catch the end of the first one, their new single called Magic, during which the boys run haphazardly around the neon-lit studio, Jace tears off his donut-themed tank top in protest, and Aegon flubs no less than three lyrics.

Robin Roberts is saying: “Now stay tuned for a very special performance coming up next after a commercial break. We’ll be moving to our outdoor stage in Times Square where a sizeable crowd has formed, and we’ve been told that Comet has a surprise in store for us! What do you think it could be, George?”

“I don’t know, Robin,” George Stephanopoulos replies gamely. “But no matter what it is, I’m sure it will have all those young ladies out there screaming!”

Lara Spencer chuckles. “And not just the young ladies either. I’ve been known to attend Comet concerts on occasion.”

Robin says: “Oh no, Lara, are you a Cregan girlie?”

“Okay, yes, I confess, I am kind of a Cregan girlie…”

You get yourself a plate of pumpkin waffles and return just in time to see the camera panning over the crowd outside: shouting, cheering, waving posters and showcasing their homemade t-shirts.

Robin Roberts announces: “And now, with a cover of One Direction’s Through The Dark, here is the illustrious, incomparable, incredible Comet Donati!”

“No way,” you murmur, staring rapturously at the screen.

“You like that one?” your dad asks, tossing pieces of waffles to the dogs.

“It’s my favorite.” And Aemond knows that. I told him in Singapore.

The stage is empty as the first acoustic notes ring out. Then Daeron trots into view—radiant and cheerful in his donut merch—to sing the first lines:

“You tell me that you’re sad and lost your way

You tell me that your tears are here to stay,

But I know you’re only hiding

And I just wanna see you…”

Aegon appears next, clopping in his sparkly pink Crocs. He flips his hair around and winks mischieviously into the camera as he sings:

“You tell me that you’re hurt and you’re in pain

And I can see your head is held in shame,

But I just wanna see you smile again

See you smile again…”

And now the crowd is not just loud but deafening, and you’re so shocked the plate of pumpkin waffles tumbles out of your hands and onto the floor for the Australian cattle dogs to devour, because who bolts out onto the stage next is not Cregan or Luke or Jace but Aemond Targaryen, wearing Aegon’s beloved donut merch and his Adidas sneakers and his scar and blind eye bare for the world to witness. They don’t seem to take any notice of his maiming at all. They screech and hyperventilate and reach for him, awed, ecstatic, touching his outstretched fingertips and his sneakers like the relics of a saint. He is focused, perhaps nervous, but he is smiling. His voice is velvet-smooth and pitch-perfect.

“But don’t burn out

Even if you scream and shout,

It’ll come back to you

And I’ll be here for you…”

The others arrive, and now all six of them are singing the chorus in harmony as they traverse the stage, dodging each other’s chaotic spins and leaps, waving to the crowd, checking on Aemond with encouraging furtive grins and squeezes of his shoulders. Luke is beaming. Jace shoves Aemond playfully and almost gets flung off the stage in return.

“Oh I will carry you over

Fire and water for your love,

And I will hold you closer

Hope your heart is strong enough,

When the night is coming down on you

We will find a way through the dark.”

“Huh,” your dad says. “They ain’t no Johnny Cash, but they’re pretty good, I reckon. I thought Aemond wasn’t on stage much anymore.”

“He’s not.” And you smile wistfully as you watch him, right here with you and yet a world away, real and yet intangible, facts and myths and faith. “But now he knows he has a choice.”

On warm nights, you sit on the wraparound front porch and flick Aemond’s square metal lighter to life, shut it, ignite it again, a lonely golden spark in an ocean of darkness, a star in the night sky. And voices circle in your mind like satellites:

I think history is important.

Whoever you are when you’re in high school…that’s sort of who you are forever, you know?

I’ve never met anyone like you.

Aemond would want to be involved.

What the hell do I know about being a decent father?

Our father never cared about us.

It’s not just for me. It’s never been just for me.

“Please come back,” you whisper to the infinite emptiness of the universe, so softly you can barely hear yourself.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s November, and you are finally showing more than you can hide beneath hoodies and sweaters. The attendees of your parents’ Southern Baptist church—who glimpse you at Walmart or McDonald’s or Freddy’s Frozen Custard or 7-Eleven—gossip about you ceaselessly, venomously, with pity but no compassion. And your parents, who have been politely ignoring jibes about you for a decade, do more than just ignore it this time. They clear out their church mailbox and walk out the front door together and never go back. They’ve been shopping around for a new place of worship. Your mom says they might get really experimental and try out the Methodists.

Rhaena sends you pictures from her and Luke’s trip to the Mammoth Site in South Dakota. Baela has you on speakerphone when she tells Jace she wants to take a break. She’s completed two ballet school auditions already, and has scheduled two more; at least one acceptance seems imminent. You call Cregan to ask him how to prepare for parenthood. You call Criston to ask if he’d be willing to serve as a reference. He writes you a five-page recommendation letter and tells you prospective employers can contact him any time, day or night. You are hired as a therapist by the University of Missouri. For now, to accommodate your high-risk pregnancy and copious doctor’s appointments, it is a part-time remote position. Your parents are at last forced to get internet for the farmhouse. Your dad starts watching beef cattle raising tutorials on YouTube. And oddly, when you begin taking appointments with college students struggling with breakups or parental pressure or substance abuse, you don’t feel nervous at all. You feel like you’re doing exactly what you were made for.

One morning, you receive a WhatsApp message from Aegon: I wonder if bumblefuck Kansas has the Rolling Stone…

Missouri, you reply, and then you go to Walmart to check. Sure enough, there are numerous copies in the magazine aisle, and that’s a good thing, because a plethora of teenage girls are scrambling for them. Aemond is on the front cover, smiling faintly; his scar and cloudy blind eye are neither centered nor hidden. And he isn’t wearing black. His suit is a deep, lush green like jade, summer grass, ivy. The title reads: Aemond Targaryen is Out of Hiding.

You begin reading. He talks about exactly what happened at the Budokan. He talks about the label’s unilateral decision to excise him from the band. He talks about feeling lost, humiliated, pitied, ignored, unlovable. And then he shares what changed him. He says that he met with other survivors of facial trauma: soldiers, professional athletes, people involved in car and motorcycle accidents. He says that he sat down with half a dozen different therapists until he found one that he really liked. He chronicles the process of finding purpose again in a way that is truthful and inspirational and yet—to you, anyway—conspicuously vague. He is still somewhat involved with Comet’s songwriting and will likely perform with them once or twice per year, he wants to advocate for people living with disabilities like his…but what else? What else?

I think what I want people to know is that progress isn’t instant, and that nobody can do it alone, Aemond writes. I’m only where I am today because of the support of a lot of extraordinary people. I want to thank Comet Donati—Luke, Cregan, Aegon, Daeron, and Jace—as well as our tour manager Criston Cole, who is like a father us. I am immensely grateful to my mother Alicent and my sister Helaena. I am indebted to the fans for the unconditional love they have shown me.

But most of all, I owe my recovery to a therapist from the American Midwest. She can be a little pretentious sometimes, but we don’t fault her for that. She’s earned it. Thank you, Stargirl. I hope this planet is treating you well.

Smiling, glowing, you close the magazine, take it to the checkout counter, purchase it along with five KitKat bars. The baby can’t seem to get enough of them.

Two days later, you have another ultrasound done—your fourth—and at last you are able to give Aegon the answer he’s been zealously hounding you for. You message him on WhatsApp: You’re going to have a niece!

!!!!! he replies almost immediately. And then: Name her Aegonella.

Probably not!

As if you have any better ideas??

You share a few from your list: Celeste, Luna, Aurora, Halley…

Aemond literally just said Halley, Aegon types back. Like right before you did. And then: He’s very excited, omg, omggggggg it’s so cute. Thirty seconds later: Wish you were here :(

“Me too, Starboy,” you murmur as you sit on the couch in the den with Belmont sprawled across your lap. Then you send: I’m scared he’s not coming back.

He is, Aegon replies. He’s working on something. You’ll like it.

And you have to believe this, blindly, faithfully, trusting that something is real even when you can’t see it. You have no other choice.

You beg your dad not to slaughter any of the pigs for ham, and he reluctantly agrees. At Thanksgiving dinner, half the dishes on the table are vegan. You’re trying out new recipes. You jot down the ones you like best in a notebook Luke sent you: black pages, white ink.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s December, and there are stockings hung by the fireplace and a blanket of snow on the ground. You and your parents pick out a Christmas tree at a local farm, and your dad chops it down and throws it in the back of the Ford F-150. Inside your mom’s CD player in the kitchen spins David Archuleta’s Christmas album. As your bump grows, you keep running out of clothes that fit; Aegon is always happy to mail you more donut-themed merch. Thanks to his persistence, they stock nearly every size known to humans. Baela gets her acceptance letters. Aegon gets to make out with Taylor Swift in the Colosseum. They are photographed together in Rome by paparazzi one day and then never again. A week later he’s with Selena Gomez in Ibiza. A week after that he’s spotted with Camila Cabello in New York City. The wheel keeps turning, his route through the solar system long and meandering.

Emergency! Aegon texts you one afternoon as you’re sipping hot apple cider at the dining room table and assembling a 500-piece puzzle depicting the sinking of the Titanic.

You know better than to take him too seriously. You reply, in no hurry: ?

Aemond says I can’t hang out with Starbaby unless I stop taking so many drugs?!!?! Fascist?!??!?!?!

Hang out. Like they’ll be going to clubs and Crocs stores together. You grin and reply: I mean yeah, that sounds accurate.

Well fuck, Aegon says. Guess I better start doing those substance abuse education modules again!

On Christmas Eve morning, your parents are at their slightly-less-judgmental replacement church. You are trying out a new recipe in the kitchen: vegan snickerdoodles. The whole house smells like cinnamon and vanilla. Beyond the window over the sink, snow falls in fluffy white bundles like rumpled bedsheets, like clouds. The Australian cattle dogs follow you around hoping for dropped cookies, their claws clicking on the hardwood floor. David Archuleta is singing O Come, All Ye Faithful. You keep bumping into things; you forget how big you are. Your belly seems to grow by the day.

Your iPhone buzzes. It’s a WhatsApp message from Aegon that puzzles you: Hey, I promised I wouldn’t bother you guys for the first few days but I really need the Netflix password and he’s not answering my texts, rude, so could you ask him for it please??? And then a few seconds later: Please. I just really want to watch Grey’s Anatomy.

You stare at his message, not understanding. You reply: Ask who…?

After a moment, Aegon sends back: …Never mind :)

“Really?” you gasp to yourself in the hushed peace of the kitchen, not wanting to believe, not wanting to be disappointed. You peek out the window. Nothing.

You open Google and search Aemond Targaryen. One of the first results is an article from the Kansas City Star published one hour ago. The headline reads: Comet Donati Heartthrob Opens Farm Animal Rescue Outside of Kansas City.

“Oh my God.” You scroll madly, skimming the text. “Oh my God, oh my God.”

One of Aemond’s quotes reads: I wanted to go where the need is. A sanctuary like this in San Francisco or Boston wouldn’t be anything special, wouldn’t be as necessary. But here in Missouri, at the epicenter of industrial animal agriculture in the United States? There’s a lot of important work to be done here. There are a lot of lives I hope to be able to save. We’ve been purchasing animals from auctions and taking in others that have been seized from situations where they were abused or neglected. In addition to our own efforts, I’d like to help launch similar rescues throughout the Midwest, and increase public access to vegan alternatives…

There are photos of him posing with animals: a towering, scarred, ancient mule named Vhagar, a three-legged goat called Sunfyre. In all the pictures, Aemond is smiling. And here in the kitchen of your parents’ farmhouse, so are you. Without thinking, you reach back to touch your fingertips to the black-ink words beneath your Comet Donati crewneck sweatshirt. You hear the lyrics— I’ll come back for you if it kills me, Comets clip by again after eons and so can I—and you know them to be true like space, time, gravity, love.

You look out the window again and he’s here, speeding down the winding path of the driveway, snow dust streaming out behind his Gold Star like the tail of a comet.

#aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond x you #aegon ii targaryen #aegon targaryen #aegon ii #aegon targaryen ii #aemond x y/n #aemond one eye #aegon targaryen x reader #aemond x reader #aemond targaryen x you

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sincericida · 1 year

Note

hii hey !! i hope you’re having a good night :)) i love your blog and all the stuff you post, you also seem so lovely in general :)

sorry to bother you just i saw this ask about angsty fic recs you replied to and i was wondering since life isn’t going good atm and today suck if you had like any adoring tasm!peter fic recs? like him just being the crazy in love doting worshiping boyfriend we all love ? not like comfort fic, just him being needy and touchy and or like protective and a tiny bit possessive

okay that last part got outta hand a little sorry i just really want to smile today :C

Awwwww thank you, and good that you like my little corner! 🥰

Well, about the fluffy fics, I’ll leave here some of my favorite fluffy & smut & swag fanfics. Maybe you know some of them (if not all), but still, have fun!

"Secret Ingredient", "Lightning Bugs" "Blackout", "Thick and Thin" by @ficthots

"Happiness: and Other Frightening Concepts" by @rancidpancakebatter

"Glad You’re Home", "Field Trips-Not Just Educational", "Can I borrow your height?", "An Intruder (of sorts)" by @withahappyrefrain

"Peter to ice skating", "Peter Parker confesses his love" by @forever-rogue

"YOUR BIGGEST FAN" by @starpdfs

"Baby, don’t make me spell it out for you" by @p3mybeloved

"Wonderfully Bizarre (Mob! Peter Parker)" by @reidslovely

"YOUR GIRL- P.B PARKER", "STUDY BUDDY" by @lanadelreyscokewhor3

The "Symbiote: Mini Series" by @mrshipsmcgee

"Prototype" by @warrenwrites

"Daylight" by @webslingingslasher

"MOON RIVER" by @scorpiomother

"August slipped away" by @peterthepark

"Horror Night" by @forest-fics

"The Tour" by @literaila

"Four drinks I'm wasted" by @mortwig

"Claiming what is mine again" by @frost-queen

"'Til Kingdom Come" by @pedrito-friskito

"Warm Shower and Soft Kisses" by @bitchyycapricorn

"Committed to the Cause" by @ofbluesandyellows

The "Florence" Masterlist by @periprose

If you know of other fics of the genre, repose and value the writers of Tumblr. ❤️

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phantomspiderr · 1 year

Text

Right

Pairing: Jake Lockley x afab!reader (established Marc Spector x reader)

Word Count: 3.9k+

Summary: Who knew being apart for weeks is the thing that sends you both over the edge ~part 2 to this beauty Wrong~

Warnings/Tags: 18+ SMUT, unprotected p in v, fingering, oh sweet virgin!jake, also touchstarved!jake if you squint, edging, both switch!Jake&reader(?), oral (m receiving), little bit of fluff sprinkled in, cursing, smidge of manhandling

a/n: okayyy this was completely self indulgent… I’m feeling a type of way and my heads fuzzy now. I’m glad so many of you enjoyed the first part and honestly can’t thank the anon that requested this enough. As always thank you so much for reading🥰

You stand in the hallway, excitedly buzzing at their front door. You can’t stay still, the impatience of not seeing them for 3 weeks finally gets to you as you wait for the door to open. “Hi,” you have the widest smile on your face as the door finally swings open. For a second you’re not sure who’s fronting, their face is almost expressionless. It could be either of the three but you don’t get a moment longer to ponder. You’re pulled past the threshold and straight into his chest with a thud. His arms are wrapped around your shoulders in a firm hug, it catches you completely off guard at first but quickly you melt into him. Your arms slide around his waist, hands clasping at his back and you tuck your head into his neck. It feels so nice to be back here, it’s as if your body is able to relax for the first time in weeks. They’re here and they’re safe.

“You smell so good,” your nose brushes against his neck, smelling the aftershave that normally clings to your clothes after you leave them. It has a comforting effect every time you smell it and it seems to have an extra level to it after being apart for so long. “I missed you,” you get up on your tiptoes to kiss his jaw and then his cheek before leaning back as far as you can still in his embrace. You’re beaming up at him unable to hold in how happy you are and now he’s smiling too.

“I missed you cariño,” one of his hands comes around to stroke your cheek and your eyes fall shut, the small affection something you’ve missed dearly. His fingers curl under your jaw and gently he pushes your head back just a little. He takes his time to lean down and capture your lips with his and it takes everything in you not to let out a quiet moan.

“Hello, mi amor.”

“Hi, Jake.”

Your cheeks hurt from how long you’ve been smiling and it’s only made worse when Jake’s eyes crinkle in the corners, a rare sight that really only you truly get to see.

“I really missed you,” Jake’s eyes look over your face slowly and he hums in response but he looks like he’s really thinking about what he’s going to say next.

“Show me how much you missed me.”

You blink up at him a few times, unsure you heard him correctly but the way his eyebrow raises and his smile turns more into a smirk, you know you heard him right. His hand slides down to hold your neck, pulling you into another kiss.

“Are you sure?” You breathe against his lips and he nods before you’ve even finished your sentence. It had been months of carefully getting to know each other, months of patience and heavy makeout sessions that pushed the boundaries. Building trust with one another had been so important to Jake and therefore it was important to you. The conversations about what you were both comfortable with and what you both wanted, had done things to the imagination but now it’s happening your mind’s gone a little blank. “We can take it slow,” Jake hums again before pulling you into another kiss, “we can stop anytime.” He’s moving to kiss your neck already and at this point, you’re breathing is becoming more ragged, “you can change your mind at any-”

“Hermosa,” Jake pulls his head away enough so he can look down at you, “I am trying to fuck you, please let me.”

Your eyes grow wide and you nod your head, quickly moving one of your hands up to the back of his head. You pull him down to kiss him this time, it’s desperate and needy. His hands sweep down your body until they rest on the backs of your thighs, he’s crouched awkwardly for a second before he hoists you up. You squeal his name, and your legs instinctively wrap around him while your hands hold his face between them. He has you giggling between kisses and even more so when you realise the front door was still wide open. Jake has you secured around him with one arm wrapped around you, the other reaching behind to close the door before he can press you up against it. He’s back to kissing your neck, strong hands massaging your thighs while yours slip into his hair.

“This isn’t really me showing you how much I missed you,” you’re breathless and it’s funny how he’s got you in such a state already. He draws himself back so he can look you in the eyes, that signature smug expression all over his face.

“Oh, you want to show me?” Again you’re nodding, feeling a surge of confidence come out of nowhere. “Okay hermosa,” he just barely brushes his lips against yours, “show me.”

Gently he pulls your legs from around him and drops you to your feet again. Something within you switches and the urge to please him, make him feel good, to show him just how much you missed him takes over completely.

Your hands smooth down his neck and over his chest, eyes locked on his as your fingers slowly move to the buttons of his shirt. Only briefly do you look away, mesmerised by the way your hands steadily expose him more. His chest is rising and falling so fast you think maybe he’s nervous but when you look up at him he’s nothing but confident. A hand comes up to hold your cheek, the gentle affection stark in comparison to the thoughts you’re having. You crane your head up to kiss him again, a little more forceful than before and your hands finally slip under his shirt. Jake sucks in a sharp breath at the contact but he moves instinctively when you push the material from his shoulders. Jake, with your help, tugs at it until it drops to the floor. The clean crisp shirt is now uncaringly wrinkled in a pile. The kisses grow more fervent as your hands delicately explore his newly exposed skin. Your nails graze against his sides and it causes goosebumps to break out all over his body. Your fingertips follow the waistline of his trousers, enjoying the deep breaths he has to take in.

“Don’t tease.” It comes out mumbled against your lips and you have to chuckle that he thinks this is teasing, it’s more appreciation and taking your time. As if to prove that point you do it again, agonisingly slowly your fingers brushing against the skin just above his waistband. This time he deeply rumbles out your name and it’s your turn to be smug, feeling your ego grow a little.

You show him some mercy, your hands moving to his belt and meticulously you begin undoing it. Suddenly, you find it amusing that Jake’s already half-naked while you still have your jacket and shoes on. So, you pull your hands away from his half-undone belt and a whine escapes him.

“Need to even it up,” you breathe out as you start tugging off your jacket. Jake’s hands quickly fumble to help you before it’s even off his fingers are pushing up the hem of your top. He’s pulling the material up your torso while you’re still yanking the jacket sleeves from your wrists. Then his lips are back on yours, a feverish kiss that makes you feel dizzy. It’s clumsy the way you’re dropping the jacket and trying to kick off your shoes all while Jake tries to strip you of another layer and kiss you desperately. You have to be the one to pull away so he can pull the top over your head. It’s barely off before Jake’s back to kissing you, his hands holding onto your face as if you might disappear and you can feel him getting lost in it all. The excitement mixed with some nervousness you know is lying beneath that’s getting him a bit carried away. Your hands move back to undoing his belt and trousers, remembering the task at hand. Jake gasps when one of your hands slips into his trousers, his forehead pressing into yours as he takes a few steadying breaths.

“You tell me to stop if it’s too much okay?” He doesn’t respond, still breathing hard even though you haven’t moved your hand. You call his name and he just starts nodding, humming briefly.

“Use your words, honey.”

“Yes-okay-please, cariño.” He’s absolutely gone already, it’s satisfying the way you’ve managed to make big, scary Jake turn into absolute incoherent mush. You press a final quick kiss to his lips before ever so slowly you sink to your knees, Jake watches with surprise unable to say or do anything but watch you.

You’re taking your time, not once taking your eyes off of his trusting that your hands can move blindly. They tug at the now undone trousers until they’re pooled at his feet, and then teasingly your nails graze up and up the outside of his legs. His eyes snap shut and his breath shudders when your fingers reach the edge of his underwear, he has to steady himself by leaning a hand against the door. Jake’s reaction makes you beam with confidence, so, your hands move, your fingers hooking under the material and dragging them down just enough. You try your hardest to fight off a grin as you note the way he sucks in a sharp breath and holds it there.

“Breathe, baby.”

Just as he focuses on breathing a normal amount, his eyes blinking open, your hand brushes over his cock and sends his breathing into a frenzy again. It’s endearing how sensitive he is, how reactive to your touch his body seems to be, there’s no hiding how he feels. You stop teasing, the need to see him wither more becoming increasingly more urgent. Delicately you place a kiss on the tip of his cock, absolutely revelling in the way his mouth drops open. Your eyes shift away from his face now, focused solely on the way your hand slowly starts to move up and down his cock and how he lets out such pretty little noises. Then his fist knocks against the door when you slowly push him past your lips, a string of unintelligible words following. You look up through your lashes and unexpectedly find him already looking down at you. His normally slicked-back hair is unruly, now strands fall onto his forehead and his eyes are half-lidded with his jaw completely slack. He’s an absolute sight and he lets out the most heavenly moan when you suck on the tip of his cock.

“Okay, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.” His hand contradicts his words as it cups the back of your head and pushes him even further into your mouth. However, your hands grip his hips and gently push him away. You don’t even get a chance to ask if he’s okay because he’s pulling you back up onto very unsteady feet. Your back hits the door but his hand shields the back of your head from the assault and you’re back to kissing. Your head is dizzy from how fast he’s moved, however, the pressure of his lips on yours again is a welcome distraction to the numbness in your legs. His hands are suddenly back on your thighs and he’s pulling you back up to wrap your legs around him, a groan catching in his throat when you grind up against him. Your hands fall into his hair, combing through the rough curls. You can feel him moving now, trying to walk you both through the flat and he stumbles completely forgetting about the trousers still wrapped around his ankles. There’s an instant shock from both of you but then you’re giggling while he attempts to kick them off.

“Sorry,” he looks back up at you, his features dropped in fear he’s ruined the moment. Immediately you start shaking your head, shushing him between kisses you gently place on his lips. You nudge his cheek with your nose so he’ll turn a little and you can press more kisses to his skin, moving down to his neck while he more cautiously takes steps this time. You take your time sucking bruising marks onto his neck, taking great satisfaction in the sigh he lets out when you graze your teeth along the top of his shoulder.

Suddenly, he’s pressing you down onto the cold kitchen countertop and you’re squealing while desperately clinging onto him. A chuckle rumbles deep in his chest as he pulls back to look at you, his fingers gently graze your jaw before he angles your head up more and just barely skims his lips over yours.

“You are so beautiful, mi amor.” You can feel your heart tighten at the sweet statement, your bottom lip jutting out just a little. For a moment, you just gaze at one another, smiles slowly growing the longer you look at each other. “Now,” his hands are back on your legs, slowly inching from your knees to your hips, “I think you’re still wearing too many clothes, no?” Your teeth sink into the inside of your bottom lip and you nod quickly. Jake grins at your eagerness before he’s pulling at the waistband of your trousers, with your assistance he manages to take off both your trousers and underwear. “That’s better,” he says dropping the material and moving closer again. Your arms wrap around his neck in an effort to keep him close and now, it’s your turn to be sensitive as his fingers lightly touch your now exposed thighs and your body shudders. Slowly, they move like they had before, up and up until his hands rest on top of your thighs. You don’t even realise your breathing has picked up, your eyes glued to his as you wait in anticipation. He smiles at you while his thumbs rub soothing circles against your skin. Your legs instinctively relax, opening ever so slightly wider and Jake seems to take that as his cue to move again. One hand moves off of your thigh and your hips squirm when Jake’s finger finally touches your pussy, your arms pull him closer until your foreheads touch. He takes his time dragging his fingers up to your clit which causes your legs to flinch, attempting to close but instead they just clamp around Jake’s hips.

Your mind’s gone completely blank, solely focused on the way his fingers repeat what they’d just done. Then they’re gone and you whine at the loss, pulling your head back from his just as he raises the same hand that’d just been touching you to his mouth. Jake pushes two fingers past his lips while holding eye contact with you and your head is so cloudy you just watch, mouth falling open. Jake’s smirking after he pulls them from his mouth, his eyes scan down your face and then he’s tapping his wet fingers against your bottom lip. You let him slide the same two fingers into your mouth, and he deliberately presses against your tongue before dragging them out again. For a second, you draw your eyes away from his to look at his fingers, the wet digits glimmering in the light. Your eyes then flicker between his hand as it moves down again and his face, finally settling back on his face just before his fingers reach your pussy again. Jake watches as your eyes fall closed when he finally touches you again, one of your hands slipping from his shoulder to hold onto the edge of the counter. He’s fully satisfied with the way you’re reacting when he’s barely done anything, all the months have built up to this exact moment and he doesn’t think he’s ever been this genuinely excited for something in his whole life. He moves agonizingly slow as he circles your clit a few times, content with the way you whimper and your breathing quickens. Shamelessly he stares at your chest for a moment, enjoying the way it rises and falls rapidly and suddenly he wants more. Jake’s quickly become addicted to the sounds you make and he wants more of them, he wants them louder until it’s all he can hear. So, he casts his gaze back to your face because he wants to watch your reaction as he slips two fingers slowly into you. He’s more than happy when your mouth drops open more and you harshly suck in air. The arm that still hangs around his neck moves, your hand sliding into his hair and holding him in place—like he’d want to be anywhere else right now.

You start panting as Jake moves his hand, pulling his fingers out almost completely before steadily pushing them in again. He builds his pace slowly, trying to memorise the way your panting turns into whimpers and then into quiet moans but he still wants more, he still wants you to be louder. His hand moves just a fraction quicker, the palm of his hand hits your clit with each thrust and it feels so good. Your fingers ache from how hard you’re gripping the edge of the counter, your other hand tugging probably a little too hard on his hair as you dangle on the edge of your climax already. You’re so close, just a little more and… he stops moving. His hand freezes, fingers still buried in your pussy and you’re clenching around him, begging for him to move as your climax begins to fade away.

“You didn’t think I’d forget cariño?” You’re dazed for a second trying to work out exactly what he said, “I need to know you remember who’s making you feel this good.”

“Jake!” You want to punch him straight in his perfectly smug face.

“See you’re learning already,” he chuckles when you raise your hands to your face, you were so close to cumming you could cry.

“Now, you keep saying my name until the neighbours know it.” Jake starts thrusting his fingers again with no warning and you gasp, the air doesn’t feel like it’s enough so you keep gasping in more. Your hands have moved to grip his shoulders, nails roughly digging into his skin.

“Come on, cariño.” Your brain finally registers what he’d said before and his name tumbles out your mouth over and over again. The cocky bastard’s grinning now, pulling you back to that edge unbelievably quick and then he just stops again. He pulls his fingers from you this time and you cry out, completely upset that he’d hold onto this grudge and be so mean about it.

“Just one more, I promise.” He contradicts his punishing hand by placing a delicate kiss on your cheek, waiting just a moment for you to come down. This time he presses his thumb to your clit, moving so slow at first until you whine his name and he shows a little mercy by speeding up. You’re so sensitive from being so close to your orgasm that it doesn’t take long for you to again be right there. You’re at the point you’re chanting out his name sprinkled with curse words and you’re just about there-

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” Your forehead hits against his shoulder and Jake has the audacity to laugh as you cry out, thoroughly frustrated now by his cruel punishment. He’d completely removed his hand again and apparently, he found it funny as you practically begged for him to keep going.

“I know hermosa, I’m sorry.” He sure doesn’t sound sorry. “This time, I promise.”

Unexpectedly, you feel the head of his cock taps against your clit, sending sparks of pleasure up your spine. You pull your head back up again, looking at him as his free hand comes up to hold your face. You think you must look desperate and you are, you’re desperate for him to finally fuck you and you’re even more desperate to cum. Both of you move at the same time, nudging your noses against each other before sharing a heartfelt kiss. You barely pull apart, holding each other close as Jake moves his cock against your pussy. His hand falls from your face to firmly hold your hip as he unhurriedly pushes into you. He’s so careful, watching for any slight indication he’s going too fast but he’s somehow unbelievably perfect. He does stutter about halfway when your pussy clenches around him and he has to bury his head in between your neck and shoulder. Both his hands are now splayed on the counter on either side of you, holding himself still for a second to recollect himself. Somehow you manage to scoot your hips closer to the edge of the counter, your legs hooking around his hips and changing the angle so much his cock slips further into you. A strangled moan falls from Jake’s lips and that urge to see him whither comes back tenfold so you try to pull him even closer. Your hand that had been gripping the counter coming around to his lower back, that paired with your legs tug him closer and one of his arms tightly winds around your back. His fingers dig into your side and he grunts out something you don’t understand but then suddenly, he’s moving his hips at a moderate pace. It catches you off guard and your grip still in his hair tightens, you press the side of your face into his. This time he doesn’t take his time to build a steady pace, slamming into you over and over as you both moan. You’re so close again and you’ll do just about anything to cum this time. The hand that was pressed against his back slips around so you can now touch yourself, your fingers circling over your clit feverishly and almost immediately your pussy starts to clench.

“Fuckfuckfuck-” Jake’s hips falter, the arm around you pulling you almost off the counter. He recovers quickly and continues to thrust into you with slightly more difficult as you clench uncontrollably now. Entirely focused on how close you are to cumming finally, Jake’s thrusts become a little more forceful and you’re completely gone. His name comes out in a whine, your fingers moving just a little faster as your climax hits you hard. It feels unbelievable and it is almost worth all of the edging you received. Almost immediately Jake’s thrusts become shallow and deliberate, your pussy spasming around him causing rough groans to ring in your ears. You’re still on a high as Jake cums, his forehead still pressed to the place between your neck and your shoulder and you can feel his quick pants against your collarbone. You have to remove your hand from your pussy as his hips keep rocking into you as he cums, your entire body becoming oversensitive. Slowly, he comes to a stop still completely submerged inside you and for a second you both try to focus on your breathing, attempting to get your racing hearts back to a normal rate.

“Hi,” you breathe out when he raises his head. Jake looks so shy, his cheeks are completely flushed and he can’t keep his eyes on yours. It makes a smile grow as you tug his head closer, pressing your lips to his and you can feel him smile into the kiss. Jake pulls away only to bury his head in your neck again.

“Hermosa,” you whisper, combing your fingers through his hair which earns you a satisfied sigh mixed with a faint chuckle.

“Hermoso.” He quietly corrects which makes you smile even more, your heart fluttering a little when he kisses your collarbone.

“Hermoso then.” You whisper again before pressing a kiss to his head, content with just holding him like this for a minute.

#jake lockley x you #jake lockely x reader #jake lockley x reader #jake lockley smut #jake lockley #jake lockley fluff #jake lockley fanfiction #jake lockley fic #moon knight x reader #moon knight fanfic #moon knight fanfiction #moon knight #moon knight smut #moonknight #moonknight x reader #moon knight x you #moon knight fluff #jake lockley my absolute beloved

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madame-fear · 5 months

Note

Hi, Amira!

I hope you are well and I am very glad that you have opened your requests 🥰🥰

I wanted to ask you if you could write a Jacaerys one shot with this prompt

73. friends to lovers situation. Getting hit with realisation that they're enamoured with you when [character] sees you laughing at someone else's joke, or flirting. Ends in love confession, too.

In a modern AU, Jacaerys and Reader going to a party together at one point get separated and Reader later sees Jace laughing about something with Sara Snow. I would like the confession not to be through an argument. Otherwise, maybe when Jace is taking Reader back to her house, he's worried because she's silent until she says out of nowhere, "I think I like you."

I can't wait to see how you develop this 💖 💖

Please take care of yourself and I wish you luck in your studies 💖 💖

*ೃ༄ 𝐒𝐀𝐘 𝐈𝐓 .ೃ࿐

★ amira speaks! : Lu my beloved, I got so happy when I got your request! 💖 Thank you very much for all the luck and kindness, sending back to you positive vibes! This was such a great distraction for me to take breaks between my studies. I hope you enjoy this, dear! <333 — summary : [ — ✧ request ] — word count : 4.5k

— pairing : modern!jacaerys velaryon x jealous!reader — genre : friends-to-lovers, a bit of jealousy from the reader, but eventually fluff.

« 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐎𝐍’𝐓 𝐃𝐄𝐂𝐄𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄, 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐈 𝐊𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐎. »

“Come on, it’ll be fun!”

You leaned against your doorframe, with your arms tightly crossed against your chest. A sigh escaped from your nostrils faintly, having Jace’s tall figure towering your own with his height.

It had never been no secret that you had favoured Jacaerys ever since you became friends. Every single time you were together, or someone brought him up casually in a conversation, you were tirelessly teased by all the people that immediatly noticed the rosy hue creeping on your cheeks, dismissing the fact that everyone, including your own family, suspected that you were enamoured by him. You denied it endlessly, even to yourself. All Jace was to you, was your best friend.

Friends and relatives kept insisting that the reason why Jace was nearly glued to you 24/7 despite having other friends to hang out with, was because everyone was so certain that he crushed on you, probably just like you did. You always took their claims between pinches, believing that Jacaerys was merely loving with you, like any best friend would be, and again, you constantly tried dismissing them. You were in absolute denial.

At the present time, you now had the chance of going with Jace to a party, being invited by him and with no other friends from your friends group going with you — as far as you knew —, and unfortunately, you had been left with endless assignments and pending homework to present before the deadline you were given.

“Jace, I have no doubt it will be fun.” you retorted, inhaling a bit before continuing to speak, “But you know I have to study—” quickly, he interrupted you. Jace knew exactly what you would tell him, and he wasn’t having none of it. You were going to get dragged to that party with him, no ‘buts’ allowed.

“I know, I know. But pleeease, come with me?” the way he managed to put on a perfect lost puppy face to be more convincing was tempting you to accept, especially when he extended the word please. It was hard to say no, but you still tried to keep yourself disciplined. “I promise you, I will bring you back home safe and sound early. Please?”

With brief seconds of silence looming over you as you thought of his proposal, you released another sigh, as a little grin tugged at the corner of your lips. A bit of fun would do no harm, after all. And besides, you needed a break from the mind fog seeing all those scholar assignments provoked you.

“Fine. You managed to convince me. I will take my coat with me.” you said, turning around to quickly search for your coat, that surely was tossed on your couch. Immediatly his coffee-coloured eyes twinkled joyfully, stupidly offering you a toothy grin from excitement. Before getting back inside, you turned around, pointing your index finger at him.

“But, you promised you will be getting me back home early,” it was difficult to have a serious expression on your features while noticing how hardly he was fighting back a childlish little proud smile quivering on his rosy, plushy lips. “And you will be fulfilling that promise.”

And with that, Jace nodded eagerly. It was impossible not to adore him with the personified golden retriever vibes he carried. “Understood, ma’am.”

Going from your house to the house where the party had been hosteed was only a short drive. The moment you set foot on the ground off of his car, swiftly closing the car door behind of you, you could even hear from outside the loud music blasting inside and see some flashing bright lights that perfectly set the partying mood. It wasn’t your first time going to a party with a friend, of course, but this one seemed to be louder and more messy.

As soon as you were kindly greeted inside by one of his acquaintances — that was the party hoster as well —, your eyes curiously stared at the ambience. The strong scent of alcohol mixed with the smoke coming from some lit cigarettes was already intoxicating, and everyone seemed to be dazed into their own little worlds. Being such a large house, you felt a bit lost, unconsciously clinging to Jace to avoid getting lost.

“Wow,” you muttered quietly, observing attentively your surroundings. “This place is huge.” Jace quietly chuckled to himself at your reaction, noticing how amused you were at the environment. “I might just get lost at any given chance.” while that was meant to sound as a joke, truth remained under the lines of your statement. He rolled his eyes playfully.

“I know, right?” he retorted, beginning to walk around the large house, getting amidst the crowd of people. “But, don’t worry. You won’t actually get lost, you know? You get used to it eventually.” you walked behind of him like a lost puppy, almost. Your eyes curiously wandered around, occasionally craning your head around and pausing on your steps to mentally guide yourself through the house. Taking slow steps to allow you to catch up with him, a wide grin appeared on his lips as he turned around to look on you.

“Don’t worry about getting lost, love. You can easily find your way back whenever you want. And there’s always someone who can help you, so don’t be afraid of asking for directions.” you nodded in agreement, feeling relieved at his words. The feeling of heat began creeping on your cheeks leisurely, becoming a crimson tint on your face. Hearing him refer to you as love, despite being used to him being this endearing with you, never failed to make you feel like a little schoolgirl with a crush. Everytime that feeling grew inside of you, you quickly tried thinking of something else to pretend you had never just felt those types of emotions with your best friend.

It was unbeknownst to you that the eldest Velaryon boy pretty much felt flustered of having your presence so near to his own, without having any other mutual friend around you. Noticing the blatant crimson shade forming on your cheeks, with his hand Jacaerys playfully ruffled your hair in a teasing manner, like he always used to be around you. “Or perhaps, I could also just leave you around here by yourself without you realising... And you’ll actually see it’s not so hard to find your way back.” he said with a chuckle spurring from your lips. Rolling your eyes again, you pushed his hand from your now chaotic hair from his ruffling, fighting back a grin to form on your lips.

“Do that and I will kill you. Mark my words.” now, he snickered a bit loudly at your comments. for Jace, being annoyed at his own teasing simply made you more loveable for him. He wouldn’t actually admit it, much like yourself, as he felt shy enough to even think about admitting such thing to you, but one of the reasons Jace adored playing around with you and getting you annoyed, or even calling you endearing nicknames, was to simply see your pretty cheeks light up all thanks to him. And he took pride on it.

Several minutes then had passed, with you walking by his side, nearly glued to his body. Jace walked around the large house, trying not to stumble upon the crowds of people in each space, as he lead you to different rooms to show you around. During several moments when you got distracted, you caught glimpses of people dazing themselves off with the alcohol, smoking, or even couples laying on the couches or hiding in a corner notoriously kissing in a rather fervent manner.

Curiously, without thinking much about it as over the passing time you grew slightly more confident inside the house where the party was being hosted, you decided to explore around by yourself. Not that you had forgotten about Jace, of course, but you had all the confidence in the world of strolling around the large party knowing Jace was near you. You hadn’t distanced yourself much from him, or at least you tried not to merely as to not test your own luck; it was just a few random rooms and spaces that you decided to briefly explore, before turning around and walking towards one of the rooms where you had caught a glimpse of Jace going to.

“I have no idea how you can easily walk around here without getting lost.” you spoke naturally, with your voice slightly raised due to the loudly blasting music, assuming Jace was going to be there where you thought you had seen him. “I mean, I get it that you’ve been here several times but Jesus Christ, I would get lost over and over each time.” you continued joking, with your hands on your pockets as your gaze lingered on the ground for a few seconds before raising them to look at Jacaerys.

But there was no sight of him, only a few small groups of people that talked with each other. Without realising, Jace apparently had kept walking mindlessly around, disappearing amidst the rooms and the large crowd of people that occupied the broad spaces. And by the time you tried to keep up with him after trying to quickly explore the house, you immediatly realised you had lost Jace from near sight.

Abruptly stopping on your steps, in the middle of one of the halls surrounded by sy strangers, you tried scanning the place. For fucks sake, how could have Jace disappeared in the blink of an eye? He was just around where you had been, he couldn’t be so far away! You could feel your heart slightly starting to pound against your chest, that provoked a burdening disorientated sensation on you at being in such vast, unknown space.

“Jace?” lifting your voice slightly, you turned around again, moving your gaze absolutely everywhere. A frustrated huff escaped from you. “You can easily find your way back whenever you want,” he said, “You won’t get lost.” and here you where. At that moment, you remembered the moment Jacaerys said he would abruptly leave you to your own so you would know how to find your way back. But, knowing him, it was most likely that he probably left you alone by accident rather than currently be playing around with you.

You were about to kill him for leaving you around by yourself, without a doubt.

The nerves were beginning to overwhelm you, feeling lightheaded at the disorientation you currently had. To which, you decided to trace back your steps, managing to guide yourself to the living hall where most of the guests were, and it was near the main front door. Maybe he was right, once you explored around and got used to this strangers — his acquaintances — house, you would get used to it.

After spending the few next minutes tracing back all of the rooms you had gone through, with your anxiety rising with the slow passing of the seconds, you released a sigh of relief the moment you reached the main living room. Perhaps Jace was there, or if you didn’t find him, you would just leave and wait outside next to his car — sooner or later, he would realise you weren’t there.

The blaring music coming from the speakers had increased in sound, as well as the loud chattering and drunken giggles. You reached the crowd full of people, occasionally tiptoeing a bit, nearly bumping into some as to spot for Jacaerys. You eventually found yourself nearly surfing into the crowds of people, being careful as to not spill anyone’s drink or anything. As you tiptoed again, you managed to spot Jace in a corner, making you feel relieved to have caught a glimpse of him. Immediatly, you rushed towards him, still being cautious due to the vast amount of guests.

And as you got nearer him, you realised a bit late that he was hanging around with a girl. Soft laughter spurred from his rosy lips as his eyes twinkled, hearing very faintly how they made silly comments.

You recognised the girl immediatly, as you had often seen her in the group of friends you shared with Jacaerys, and in a way, she could be considered rather popular. It was none other than Sara Snow. A tinge of jealousy overwhelmed you abruptly, feeling a tight knot forming on your stomach. You had to admit to yourself, she was literally beautiful; with long dark hair, fair skin, and in general, all her features were absolutely beateous. Sara knew how to be charming and endearing, but knowing how close to Jacaerys she was, it simply made you want to vanish right there and forget you had seen him laughing along her silly remarks and being close to one another.

A great burden sat on your chest rather uncomfortably, yet it was hard to gaze away. And now all you wanted, despite being hesitant in approaching them, was simply to leave. For those dreadful seconds that you stood there, almost out of the crowd, staring at them; you were leisurely being hit with the realisation that... Maybe, after all, your friends and relatives were right all along despite your constant denial and dismissing. You were indeed enamoured of Jacaerys. You were head over heels for him, and you felt a part of you being ripped apart brutally at the sight of him hanging around so casually with another woman.

Part of you tried to keep denying it, but another part of yourself, was much more strongly accepting the feelings that remained hidden in you for such a long time. You gulped anxiously, feeling a lump choke your throat, having a mix of jealousy, anger, and disappointment. Of course, you were well aware that both of them laughing and talking meant nothing... Probably. But either way, you had a growingly strenuous need of pulling him away with her, and having him taking you home again.

A shaky huff escaped from you, feeling your hands trembling from all the burning jealousy that had been ignited inside of you. “Jacaerys!” you brought his attention, immediatly breaking their conversation as you approached them, and their gazes fell on you. His coffee eyes seemed to become brighter at the sight of you, offering you a dumbfounding toothy grin. Gods, he could make you melt right there. “(y/n)! I had been looking for you, but I simply assumed—”

You interrupted him abruptly, moving your stare to Sara for a moment. “Sorry, I’m stealing him away from you for the rest of the night. But it was lovely seeing you again!” those words were nearly spat, sounding harshly cold before looking back at Jacaerys, forcing a smile. “We have to go. It’s getting late for me, remember?” your words came rushed as you raised your eyebrows at him, and Jace seemed to be completely oblivious about how you were seething.

His eyes were widen in realisation at the time, remembering you had to get back home early. The party had been a mere study break for you, that was all. “Oh, yes! You’re right, sorry!” he quickly apologised, looking at you for a moment, before staring at the girl in front of him. “It was lovely talking to you, Sara, see you another ti—”

Not holding yourself back from the smothering jealousy that seemed to increase with the passing of the seconds, you abruptly took Jace’s hand. It was the first time you had actually held hands, especially with such a tight grip as your own, currently. His hands were warm, and his skin had some sort of velvet texture. His eyes widened in surprise at your actions, realising that your physical contact seemed very soothing, in a way.

A faint rosy tint formed on his cheeks, as well as your own, starting to drag him away from Sara Snow, and the entire party. He managed to wave goodbye to her in a hurried way, but really, his focus was now on you like it always had been.

Your steps were loud against the floor, nearly stomping. There was something in the atmosphere around you that clearly indicated, you weren’t exactly holding the most positive vibes. Maybe something had happened, besides you wanting to get home early to study and present your assignments on time, and he wasn’t aware of it. The door was swiftly open, taking him outside with you, and you slammed it close immediatly. In a way, you felt embarrassed of not hiding the fact that you weren’t content, but it didn’t matter at the moment.

“Jacaerys Velaryon, I will so kill you. I’m getting late.” you muttered between your clenched teeth, letting go of his hand so he can use his keys to unlock the car, and get inside. Those words didn’t mean to sound angry, but rather, as if you were rushed. And you were, you now wanted to get back home and simply forget about the situation and the own realisation of your feelings. “I’m sorry! I thought you had found your own way around the rooms to have fun!” he shouted back, excusing himself. There was no lie in it, he was merely being innocently genuine having thought that you would follow him, but then noticed how you kept exploring the vast rooms.

Reaching the car door, you opened it, and wasted no time in getting inside of it. Loud slamming was heard from both of you, as he felt a certain discontented hurried vibe to you. It was clear in your words, way of acting, and the certain frowny face you expressed. Fastening your seatbelts, he wasted no time in getting the car started, faintly hearing in the background how the music continued being played, and everyone was immersed in their own little world. Pressing your head against the window with your arms tightly crossed against your chest, you tried to balance the feeling of being angrily moody at the situation, and as well, balancing how you suddenly realised that you did in fact fancy him more than just a best friend.

It was hard for you to admit it. And having to find out about your feelings thanks to another woman so blatantly trying to flirt with Jace and scooting closer to him wasn’t the best manner to find out. Jealousy rooted itself venomously on your stomach and chest, fighting back against the memories of them laughing and talking ever so casually. But at the same time, you felt awkwardly embarrassed of having that outburst with no control of your emotions in front of him. He had no fault in your own emotions, Jace was simply kind and polite with everyone, and obviously he just wanted you to have some fun with him.

As the car started, the rest of the ride was entirely noiseless. Awkward silence bloomed with the passing seconds, only hearing very silently the wind gushing through the slightly open car windows, and the sound of a few cars driving past you. Your eyes were fixed on the view of your passenger window, not daring to even flinch or move to avoid making things more awkward and tense, somehow.

Having known you for quite some time, Jace always sensed when something was wrong with you, and being the lovingly caring person he is — especially when it comes to you —, he always felt the imminent and only natural preoccupation growing in him.

The car leisurely stopped from driving as you had to pull up in front of a red light; being merely a few blocks away from reaching your house. Your arms continued tightly crossed against you, with your head leaned against the car window. The soft gushing of the wind continued passing through the slightly open windows, feeling refreshed in a way to have the cool breeze hit delicately against your face in such a tense moment between the two of you. Maybe you had overreacted, as you really wasn’t angry with him; you were overwhelmed with

Despite not daring to turn your head and stare at him, or even speak up about what happened, you could feel his gaze piercing on you with concern. His fingers fidgeted anxiously as he dreadfully awaited for the red lights to turn green. Clearing his throat, Jace decided to speak up first for both of you. “(y/n), are you... Alright?” he inquired, with a low cooing tone, fixing his stare on you. Your body stiffened slightly as he broke the ice in the atmosphere, but slowly tried to relax.

His eyes returned to the steering wheel and the road, the moment the green light brightly reflected upon both of you. The car continued moving, but in a tranquil manner as you were about to return home in a few minutes. “You seem upset,” jace continued. With your arms still crossed, you shyly decided to face him. “Did something happen back there that I need to be aware of?” gods, he was such a caring person. You felt bad of having reacted that way around him, but at the same time, you knew you couldn’t possibly be angry with him. In fact, you simply felt jealous towards Sara Snow, but not really upset. “Or... D-Did I do, or say anything to possibly make you feel angry at me?”

Despite not wanting to get his eyes off the road, his gaze met your own for a second, before entering the block where your house was located. At hearing his words and the hint of genuine concern behind his voice tone, your heart dropped heavily. Your eyes widened, as you shook your head. The least of things you wished right now, was to possibly make him feel bad at himself for a simple misunderstanding. In any case, you felt like the one to blame for the situation. “No, no! It’s alright, you didn’t say or do anything!” you clarified quickly, feeling your heart beating against your chest nervously.

“I-It’s just that, I...” you trailed off, stroking your arm with your hand up and down in a very slow manner rather awkwardly. Swallowing anxiously, you were uncertain whether to be honest with him, or simply keep up with the lie that you dragged him out of there because you were getting home later than expected. But, as bold as speaking up for your feelings was, with the risk of him possibly not reciprocating them, you felt the ardent need of admitting it to him. At least, it was much better than leaving him worried about you, or wondering what could’ve happened to you to react in such a strange, unlikely-of-you manner.

With a few seconds that passed, with an awkward silence being left after you left mumbled words to trail off into nothingness, the car eventually pulled up in front of your house. You sat in the passenger seat nervously, feeling a knot in your stomach, fidgeting with your fingers. As he stopped the car, his eyes managed to properly focus on you now, attentively hearing whatever you had to say. “You didn’t do anything wrong, Jace. You could never make me feel upset,” you began. Softly, you inhaled air, lingering your gaze on your lap before raising it to stare at his own eyes.

“I think I like you.” you blurted out, immediatly swallowing.

Slowly, realisation dawned upon him. His lips parted very slightly as if to speak, but no words came, not for some time at least. Jacaerys seemed to be taken aback by this abrupt confession of yours, unsure of how to respond back to it. You bit down on your lower lip, waiting. The silence felt thick and heavy, suffocating you. His cheeks became a notorious crimson hue, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

“(y/n),” he whispered, looking at you, “Do... D-Do you really mean it?” his words came out as if he were in utter disbelief. For his friends and close acquaintances, it was wellknown that Jace badly swooned after you, and his gaze never failed to be fixed on yours the moment he spotted you somewhere; unfortunately provoking him endless teasing. His cheeks became a notorious crimson hue, taking over his pale skin. You swallowed again, feeling the pressure build in your throat as your heart began to beat faster.

“Yes. I... I do mean it.” you admitted, nodding earnestly. Jace didn’t say anything further but you could tell from his expression that he was satisfied enough to know your answer. Silence kept hanging around the environment after you admitted it, dropping your gaze to your lap once again out of embarrassment, noticing that Jacaerys wasn’t saying anything else.

But you were surprised when one of his hands delicately, yet firmly lifted your head by your chin, and he leaned closer to you. Softly holding you by your chin, his lips were pressed against your own. They were beautifully plushy, enough for you to have the need to nibble on them playfully. Your eyes initially widened at the feeling of his warm lips locking with your own, but eventually they fluttered shut, allowing him to do as he pleased.

It was gentle at first, then gradually it became slightly more intense, tilting your head to your side to kiss him deeper. He held you securely with his arms around your waist, kissing you so tenderly that it seemed as if Jace had waited years for this to happen. You felt his hand travelling to the back of your neck, with his fingers reaching your hair and tangling themselves up on it’s silky strands. After what seemed to be an eternity, despite merely being almost a minute, your lips parted from one another.

With your eyes opening again, panting from the lack of air during the kiss, a silly little grin tugged at the corner of your lips, quivering until it became a proper toothy grin. Both your faces were equally flustered, as some giggles spurred from your now glossy lips. His arms remained around you, holding you dearly. “You could’ve said so much sooner, you know that?” he mumbled, gazing down at you tenderly with his beautiful brown eyes.

His lips went to your forehead, placing a loving smooch on your skin. His fingers continued lazily playing with strands of your hair, twirling them around his finger. You were nearly breathless, allowing your head to rest against the crook of his neck. It hadn’t taken him long to notice you had become jealous at Sara Snow... But why get jealous, when all he could possibly think about all day long was you?

“You know,” Jace continued, resting his chin on top of your head. He knew you had to go back to your home soon, but the least he wanted was for this moment to end. “I think I should get you jealous more often, somehow it makes you look prettier than you already are.” a proud smirk appeared on his lips at his own teasing, feeling you click your tongue as to dismiss his words, and you immediatly looked up at him; several chuckles escaping from Jacaerys at your reaction.

“You are such an idiot,” you began, helplessly smiling back at him. Your nails gently scraped his skin under his chin, slightly leaning to kiss his jaw. “But you’re lucky I adore you just like that.”

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sagesolsticewrites · 2 months

Text

Pillow Talk

Anthony is in desperate need of rest & relaxation when he returns home from his latest project, and you’re more than happy to provide it.

This was coauthored by my bestie, light of my life, fellow Anto girlie @winniemaywebber! Ilysm bestie, it’s always so much fun to write with you 🥹🥰

playlist for this fic made by @winniemaywebber!!

Warnings: swearing

Word count: 1.1k

You glance impatiently at your phone, willing time to move faster.

Anthony was going to be home from his latest project any second, and you couldn’t wait. He had gone on and on in your texts about how excited he was to be home with you, and all the date nights the two of you had to catch up on.

Your thoughts are interrupted by the telltale jingle of keys at the front door and you race to the foyer with a squeal as the door opens to reveal your boyfriend.

He barely has time to set his bags down before you’re launching yourself into his arms, capturing his lips in a tender, long overdue kiss.

“Hi there, darling,” he laughs as you pull away, “Miss me?”

“So much,” you sigh, “I’m so glad you’re home.”

“I’m very glad to be home,” he says, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead as you help him lug his bags inside.

“So,” he says, once you’ve moved his luggage to a corner of your shared bedroom to be dealt with another day, “Shall we go out for lunch, or make something here?”

“It’s whatever you want, my love.”

“Well… I have been missing your grilled cheese…” he confesses with a pleading look.

“Grilled cheese, coming right up,” you reply with a bright smile.

Anto watches you make lunch, cheek propped up on his hand as the two of you make quiet conversation. He seems… a bit quieter than usual, but you chalk that up to the long flight.

It’s only when his eyelids begin to droop as you’re serving lunch — his grilled cheese adorably cut into triangles, just the way he likes it — that you become concerned, now fully taking in how exhausted he looks: his skin is much paler than usual, large dusky purple bags under tired brown eyes… how had you not noticed sooner?

“Anto, baby?” You prod, shaking his shoulder gently.

He jolts up with a sharp inhale.

“Oh- fuck, m’sorry sweetheart, didn’t mean to doze off on you,” he says apologetically, blinking rapidly.

“Honey…” your hand comes up to cup his scruffy cheek, “Are you okay?”

“Me? I’m fine,” he assures you, waving off your concern, “Just a little tired from the flight, ‘s all. I’ll be fine once I spend some more time with my favorite girl.”

He presses a kiss to your palm, but his eyes don’t have the same brightness and surety they normally do as he asks, “So what would my girl like to do on my first day back?”

“Sweetheart,” you say, your voice suddenly serious, brow furrowing in concern, “I love you so, so much, and I know we talked about all the things we were going to do once you got home, but…”

You scan his face, taking in the stark purple bags contrasting with the paleness of his skin, tiredness etched into every line of his face.

“You look absolutely exhausted, honey.”

Before he can protest, you continue, “You asked me what I wanted to do? I want you to hop in bed and let me take care of you so you can finally get some rest.”

You take him by the hand and lead him to the bedroom, his hand tightly in yours. Closing the door, you take another look at his face: his usually sparkling eyes are fizzling, his cheeky grin fading fast with every extra moment of tiredness. You reach out and stroke his cheek, your face still etched with concern.

Without a word from either of you, you gently begin to unbutton his shirt. He sighs, barely able to keep his eyes open but not protesting this act of service. Next, his pants, bending down to help him out of them. Next is your clothes, your shirt and sweatpants peeling off you quickly.

“Right, my love,” you say softly, sweetly. “Into bed.”

He does as he's told, his whole body relaxing under the freshly laundered sheets, starting to curl up under the goose down comforter. You lay next to him, noses touching. You feel him breathe deeply, seemingly fully relaxed for the first time in days. Your hand reaches out, and you begin to stroke the patch of skin where his neck meets his shoulders.

“This okay?” You inquire, pulling away for a second.

“Darling, it's perfect.” He replies, sleep definitely threatening to take over. He nuzzles his face into the pillow and begins to snore quietly, until he feels you change position in the bed.

Laying on your back, you delicately pull him from his original position to get him to lay on you. Without opening his eyes, he does so, his whole body wrapping around yours, his hands around your waist and yours finding themselves buried in his hair, lovingly massaging his scalp with your fingertips.

The room is silent for several minutes, your calm, slow breathing the only sound. You glance down to where Anthony’s head is now resting on your chest, smiling when you see his eyes are still closed. You notice some pattern in the back of your mind, and though it takes you a moment to place it, a part of you goes gooey and soft as you realize he’s breathing in time with your heartbeat.

You continue raking your fingers gently through his curls, believing sleep has finally overtaken him, until he mumbles sleepily against your skin.

“Thank you, my love.”

You smile and brush a gentle kiss to his forehead, your own eyes growing heavy, “You know I’ll always take care of you, honey.”

The two of you drift off, the bright sunlight streaming through your bedroom window fading to a gold-orange sunset as the day passes.

You blink awake, the soft snores you hear a clear indication that your makeshift weighted blanket Anto is still sound asleep. Noting the change in the light and shifting shadows in the room, you figure it must be time for dinner. Anto must be hungry, at least, even if you aren’t at the moment.

You begin to carefully shift out from under him, inch by inch, only for him to whine sleepily and clutch you close once more.

“Baby,” you whisper with a soft laugh, “I was just gonna fix you some dinner. Aren’t you hungry?”

You feel his head shake stubbornly against your skin in a clear “no”

“Jus’ wanna stay here with you. Food can wait.”

Slowly blinking back to consciousness but staying right where he is, he hums contentedly as he nuzzles himself further into your neck.

“God, I missed you so fucking much, Y/N.”

“I missed you more, sweet prince.”

“Not possible. Not at all.”

#scheduling this for Friday bc i have a feeling we’ll need some softness after this week’s ep 🥺#edit: and i was right!!!!!!#anthony boyle the man that you are!!!!!!!#anthony boyle #anthony boyle x reader #anthony boyle fic #anthony boyle fluff #my writing

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sirdindjarin · 2 years

Text

Sierra Six x Analyst!Reader

In response to an Anon ask, I give you this little one-shot. 🥰

Summary: As a CIA analyst, you've been assigned to help Sierra Six twice. This second time proves a little smutty for you.

Random Notes: Long-haired female reader, usage of words I feel weird writing, Six slighty OOC (hard to write that man as a lover sometimes) but I based him on how he is in Ballistic (Book 3).

TAGS: Smut, explicit sexual content, porn no plot, fluff(y), Six's uncontrollable angst, unprotected sex, bathroom sex, fluff, happy ending, ambiguous ending.

WORD COUNT: 5.3k

ANON ASK

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Six sits on a stone bench inside a cacophonous mall. His target is a mid-level trafficker: forties, American, good-looking. The kind of man who could successfully sell anything. The criminal sits at a table across the cavernous room, waiting for a buyer who will never show.

In D.C. for an op, Six is pleasantly surprised to hear a long-awaited voice over his comms.

"Good afternoon, oh-Six. It's very nice to see you again." He can hear your big smile.

"Considering I can't see you, I'll settle for saying that it's nice to hear you," though he wants to, Six doesn't smile for operational security.

He gets back to business, "I have eyes."

"I’m sure you've done your homework, Six, but I still have to tell you that there's an alley twenty meters behind the service doors, and Tally One will be using it to exit."

Six doesn't respond. He did do his homework. This was a run-of-the-mill mission. This man would be dead in that alley within ten minutes, and the world would be better off because of it. Six needed to exert no brain power over it. His thoughts instead drifted to taking advantage of being on the same continent as you.

Six months ago, he'd been in Peru for a week on an assignment. You'd been his analyst. However, your involvement had been remote - providing Six with data via phone calls. The sweetness in your voice couldn't be mistaken for anything other than a good soul. He'd enjoyed the warmhearted, personal way you'd spoken to him. He'd seen your file in the mission documents and noted your staff photo. Six was surprised to find himself looking forward to your phone calls. He'd thought about you often since Peru, hoping you’d be assigned together again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten minutes later, Six stands above the body of the trafficker. It was as cut and dry as he had planned, and the man never even saw it coming. Six wipes the knife and tosses it next to the body. Typically, other members of the CIA would come clean house, but they were content to leave this guy for the locals.

You pop your head from around the corner of the alley, your hair swinging out like a pendulum. Six notices the movement and his head snaps up to address the threat, but a jolt shoots through him at the sight of you. Bizarrely, he wants to shield you from the sight of the body, so he steps in front of it.

You round the corner and smile gratefully at his chivalrous gesture.

"It is so strange. I’ve been involved in the deaths of targets, but seeing their bodies in person is something else.” You're contemplative, staring at the man’s motionless form.

He doesn't reply, too distracted by you being physically present. You had been in a CIA polo and your hair had been pulled back in your employee photo, but now that you were blending in in civilian clothes, he could finally, properly see you. His heart beats faster.

You hold out your hand, wanting to introduce yourself officially.

"This is my first time out in the field. I’m glad they set me up with a legend like you, Six." You beam at him, then your tone softens, “I enjoyed talking to you last time.”

"Being a legend isn’t very fun, let me assure you."

He takes your hand. You can't help another grin. His hand is much larger than yours, and he holds onto it a second longer than he should.

He continues inelegantly, “I’m also glad it’s you here today.”

"Our ride is in five blocks. Are you okay to go?" You ask in case he had been injured.

The genuine concern on your face makes him want to smile. No one ever cared unless he was visibly bleeding.

He motions for you to lead the way, and it's one of the least altruistic acts he's ever committed. Six shamelessly let his eyes rove. The knee-length sundress you have on hugs your waist perfectly, your hair swings as you stroll, and when you turn to look back at him, Six feels his heartbeat speed up again. His characteristic near-smile appears on his face, which causes butterflies to take flight in you.

He’s so intimidating, you think. What is he smiling at?

Two blocks after leaving the alleyway, you spot a group of cops standing around eating lunch. Six eyes them as they lean down to listen to their radios, and he knows the body’s been found. They collectively trash their food and begin to jog in your direction.

Thinking quickly, you grab Six’s hand and turn into him, placing your other hand on his chest. He instinctively puts his arm around your waist, and you tilt your head up, pretending to be deep in loving conversation.

The cops run by you both without a second glance. You take a steadying breath, peeking around Six to make sure they’re gone. Once certain, you look back up at him. His arms haven’t released you, and his face looks like you’ve struck him.

Six knows what you’ve done was purely tactical, but he feels like he’s just short-circuited. All thoughts of avoiding detection have left his mind, replaced by the feeling of you. He could smell the buttercream scent of your nude lipstick. He could feel your chest rising and falling against his own.

“We’re clear,” you whisper.

He nods and lets go of you unwillingly.

You notice his hesitation and your body tightens at the thrill. Sierra Six does not think of me that way. Be professional, you tell yourself.

Wandering through downtown D.C., you navigate the busy streets until the two of you reach a black SUV. Six gallantly opens the front passenger door for you, which he’s satisfied to see makes you blush. Six gets in the driver’s seat and pulls away from the curb. He’s navigating as deftly as he can, but this city is one of the busiest in the world, and Six is well-known for his poor driving skills. The CIA’s best asset is no match for metropolitan traffic. You decide to pass the time.

“Have you been enjoying being back in the States?” You ask timidly.

You’re fiddling with the hem of your dress, which does not escape Six’s notice.

“I am now,” he says.

What does that mean? “I hope you’re able to see family, or friends, or whoever while you’re back. I’m sure it’s difficult being away all the time.”

He doesn’t answer, which makes you nervous that you’ve touched a raw subject. You can’t know that he’s trying to work up the courage to let you in. To connect with you.

“I’m sorry,” you almost whisper, “I don’t mean to be too forward.”

Your hands twist in your lap. Six’s close proximity is making your heart thump wildly, and you feel self-conscious.

Six is fascinated by your incongruous personality. You are sweet and kind. How did you wind up in such a cutthroat, gritty workplace? So, he asks. In Six’s straightforward way.

“How do you work for the CIA?”

“Oh, I have a few degrees in communications, languages, and finance.”

He raises his eyebrows at you, so you add, “I couldn’t decide what I wanted to study, so I tried them all. And then my aunt - she works in Operations - said I should try for a position as an analyst.”

Six laughs, “I never finished high school.”

Because you hear the bitterness masked in his words, you kindly lay a hand on his arm. You feel the hard muscles tense beneath your touch, which was the opposite of your intention, but you aren’t aware of how touch-starved he is. His knuckles tighten on the steering wheel.

“I know enough about the Sierra program to know why you didn’t. I don’t know what happened, but I’m sure the justice system failed you given your age.”

The vehicle lurches to a stop at another red light. Six looks over at you, amazed at your desire to soothe him. No one had ever tried to cheer him up over his own crime - except maybe Fitzroy. His jaw is clenched as he sorts out his thoughts. Six does not want to drop you off at the Langley headquarters right now, so he finally emboldens himself.

“Have you eaten?” His face is unreadable. He grimaces internally, wishing he could’ve worded that more clearly.

Not getting the hint, and hoping your admission about his past didn’t offend him, your words stumble over each other, “Oh, uh, no. I haven’t. But, if you don’t mind - I hate to even tell you this - but analysts don’t get paid all that much, so I never eat out,” you explain. “My sandwich is back at the office.”

The light changes, and he’s forced to turn away, but he tries to clarify, “I’m- asking you out for dinner.”

Oh.

“You- what?”

Your heart feels like it’s going to pound through your chest. The blood rushes in your ears. No one had asked you on a date since you’d started at the agency, and the first person to do so was Sierra Six?

He tosses you a minuscule smile before returning his eyes to the road. Six should’ve known your diffident nature wouldn’t allow you to flirt, but he wasn’t any good at it, either. He chuckles under his breath at the comedy routine this was becoming.

A small, disbelieving giggle leaves your lips. “Okay, yeah! I’d love to, Six.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You’re seated at a nice restaurant. Nice enough that they had a coat check, and the bathrooms had antechambers with chaise lounges. Six wasn’t trying to impress you; he just liked the steak here. It never crossed his mind that you might think he was trying to show off his means. Despite his humble beginnings, Six hadn’t thought about money in nearly thirty years - thanks to prison and the CIA.

“This place is so fancy,” you laugh. “Am I going to get kicked out for my dress?” It has spaghetti straps, and you’re worried.

“Do they do that?” Six had no idea if this restaurant had a dress code. He was always in a suit, anyway. Six frowns at his own lack of knowledge and chides himself for getting lazy in the U.S. His words don't assuage your worry, but you figure they probably wouldn’t have let you in to begin with.

“I don’t see how anyone could have a problem with it.” He reasons, “I like it. It's very s-” He cuts himself off at the way you're squirming.

“Thank you,” you feel hot again. You shyly duck your head.

You are nervous. Six didn’t need his extensive training in body language to tell him that. Six wonders if a non-physical compliment might make you feel more at ease.

“You were kind to me in Peru. That’s uncommon in this business.”

You meet his attentive gaze, shake your head at his words, and sigh, “That makes me sad. I guess when you see the worst of humanity day after day, it does one of two things to people. It hardens or softens them.”

“What do you think it does to me?” He asks.

You hesitate, wondering if you should be honest. “I think you’re one of the rare exceptions where it does both.”

Six sits back in his chair. “Soft is a dirty word in my line of work.”

You smile, your confidence growing. You shift forward onto your elbows, “That’s the beauty of you. You’re the only operative I’ve ever heard of who is so -” You remember you’re in public, “So good at your job but selective about your targets. You’re like Batman.” You raise an eyebrow in mock conspiracy.

Six laughs, loudly, which surprises both of you. “Batman? Jesus, that’s a first.”

“You’re better, actually,” you continue. “The things you do can be terrible - certainly the ones you go after think so,” you laugh awkwardly. “But the reality is that those terrible things do more harm to you. And you do them anyway because it’s what’s necessary. You’re a good man. You put everyone else above you.”

It’s the most passionately he’s heard you speak, and he forces down the lump in his throat. Six did not agree with you. He was inside his own head, and he knew exactly how little the acts he committed affected him. He didn’t understand that that was exactly what you meant. That the coldness in which he insulated himself also froze him out from the warmth.

“There are things the CIA does not know about me,” he says carefully. He clasps his hands on the table. “And you would not think they were good.”

“You’re human, Six.” You soothe, placing one hand over his. “You aren’t perfect, and you shouldn’t hold yourself to a standard that no one else does.”

Six falls into your eyes for a moment, stunned by the grace and sincerity. His eyes start to tour around your face, appreciating your features, before stumbling over your parted lips. His own part involuntarily, and you feel a twist of tension in your gut.

His eyes don’t leave their target as he asks, “You really think I’m a good man?”

“I mean - I don’t know you personally, I guess, but… yes. Given what I do know and how I feel about you having met you.” You blush at your choice of words, but it was honest.

“Would a good man want to do the things I want to do to you?” It’s said in a thick voice.

He feels guilty for his lustful thoughts, but they just won’t stop. He's drawn to your goodness like a moth to a flame.

Your mouth goes dry, and you answer in a whisper, “I - I don’t know.”

He smirks in a self-deprecating manner. His eyes flick back up to yours. “I think the answer’s ‘no.’”

“Six -” you start, but the waiter comes by to bring your food.

You’re no longer hungry given the look in the eyes of the man across from you. All you want to do now is take him back to your apartment and show him what you really think of him.

You thank the waiter - twice while he refills your water - and he leaves the two of you alone again. You’re speechless now, feeling awkward, wondering how to suggest it.

Six feels more awkward. He was trying not to scare you away, but instead, all he seems to do was put his foot in his mouth. He decides to change the subject abruptly.

“Do you have family?”

“Oh, uh, yes.” You’ve got whiplash from the differences in subject matter, but you tell him about your family. You mention that you’re alone in D.C. “It gets lonely on the holidays. I try to bring in some cheerfulness to the office since there are others like me, but I feel like I don’t really make a dent.” You admit.

“I’m sure you do. I already told you that you made a dent for me six months ago.” Six tries to argue. He finds it hard to believe that you couldn’t lift anyone’s mood, but he also knows the kind of assholes that work at the CIA.

You don’t make eye contact, still feeling unsteady and surprised at the turn your day has taken. Six can read your body language, but his translation is off. He believes he’s offended you, and he’s already trying to manage his anger at himself. Six had waited half of a year to be assigned together again, and now he was blowing it because he had the social graces of a monkey.

“Excuse me. I’ll be right back,” he pushes back from his chair and buttons his jacket.

You notice the look on his face as he gets up and turns away. While your training isn’t as thorough as his, your translation is spot on. You watch as he opens the men’s room door and vanishes.

You make a split-second decision.

Standing, you walk the fifty paces toward the bathroom doors. They’re rather far from the tables, you note happily. You swivel your head from side to side trying to see if anyone is watching as you pull open the men’s room instead of the women’s.

Inside, the antechamber is a deep red with artwork adorning every inch of space on the walls. You turn and see that the door locks with a deadbolt, so you throw it in place. Classical music is piped in, and a violin cries as you turn the corner to see Six standing at the sink, adjusting his jacket sleeves.

Six is visibly shocked to see you. He whirls around, pulls his gun, and races over to you.

“What’s wrong?” He’s immediately on alert.

You smile but it falters, your bravado beginning to disappear now that you’re face-to-face with him and he misunderstood your entrance.

No turning back now, you decide.

You grab his jacket’s lapel and pull him down into a kiss. His face remains impassive for several seconds as he tries to wrap his mind around what’s taking place. You part your lips, kissing him a second time, then a third time, before he finally starts to relax his own lips.

Once he reciprocates, you grab his biceps, pushing him backward in the direction you hope the furniture is. He lets you push him, which oddly makes the tension in your stomach coil faster. Six’s knees fold partially when they connect with the edge of the chaise; he sits down, grabbing your thighs in the process. His gun is discarded beside him.

Your hands frantically unbutton his jacket. He shrugs out of it. His white t-shirt leaves his scarred, tattooed arms bare to you. You rake your nails tenderly down his skin and he shudders. His lips move with yours. His tongue enters your mouth just enough to drive you wild. You lecherously note when his dick twitches underneath you.

Six’s hands come up to cradle your face, wanting to be delicate at first, but he’s ashamed to have initially thought this was a ruse. It makes him overcompensate. His hands drop to skate up your dress, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs, your ass. He pulls your body down against him roughly. Six smirks at the desperate noise you make. He wants to hear everything he can make you say.

You’re wearing the worst possible underwear, of course, as there was no thought in your mind that this would be happening. They’re old, thin cotton with holes in them. They were comfortable, but they were ugly.

Feeling frumpy, you pull out of the kiss to breathlessly tell him, “Wish I’d worn something nicer,”

You feel a jerk and hear a ripping sound as Six hooks his fingers in the elastic waistband and pulls them apart easily, his arms flexing underneath your hands.

He leans forward to taste your lips again, and mumbles, “Now I don’t have to replace them.”

Your fingers move to unzip his pants, and he groans when they graze his swelling bulge. You slide his pants down to his knees - you don’t need them all the way off, you just need him - before settling onto your knees. Your hips buck of their own volition, all-but riding his naked thigh. He clamps a hand over your mouth to muffle the cry you let out at the relief.

“Fuck,” he laughs softly, entranced by the blissful satisfaction on your face.

His laugh makes his cock jump, which reminds you of something you’d thought of often when regarding Six.

You stand, then drop to the tile floor on your knees. You quickly twist your hair into a bun, using your scrunchie to keep it out of your way. You trail your fingers down his muscular thighs, pulling his boxers down now as well. You pull his pants further (now you really do need them gone). You look up at him, wondering if this is okay.

Six is not breathing. His blonde hair is mussed from your hands. His white t-shirt is his only article of clothing. He’s looking down at the sight before him like it’s a cosmic event. His heart pounding, Six watches as your lips, the very same lips he felt depraved over earlier, wrap around his aching cock. He groans as your cheeks hollow and you start an agonizingly slow drag. His eyes close in bliss but he forces them back open. He does not want to miss a moment of this.

You cup one hand underneath his testicles as your other hand strokes along his velvety shaft, working in tandem with your mouth. Your tongue teases along a vein and Six’s hips jerk slightly. You hum, gratified. You wiggle around, your heels pressing into your clit to relieve yourself somewhat.

You relax your muscles, taking him until his tip hits the back of your throat and you gag quietly. Tears spring to your eyes as you make eye contact with him, and he almost cums right there.

“Fuck,” he says again, a strained whisper this time. He grasps your chin and eases himself from your mouth, explaining, “You come first.”

The back of your hand comes up to wipe your mouth, before you’re straddling his lap once more. His lips and teeth and tongue work at your neck, your chest, while his hands push down the straps of your dress to give him more access.

You can feel him, heavy and straining beneath you, and you can’t stop yourself from sliding your hands along his shaft. You tease the head of his cock against your folds, causing both of you to groan.

Suddenly, you’re on your back. The chaise scrapes the floor in protest. You almost lose your breath with the speed he’d tucked you underneath him. But you’re not complaining. He sheds his shirt, and now Six is completely nude.

He’s so beautiful. You feel so pleasantly small underneath him and his intensely warm gaze. Six is making you feel protected and admired. It’s an overwhelming feeling. Your fingers press against the pinup tattoo on his left pectoral as if to feel the ink impression.

I’m still dressed, it flashes in your mind. As you complete that thought, however, he rucks up your skirt and pulls the bodice down, leaving you exposed to him.

Six wastes no time palming your breasts, unabashedly enjoying them. He shifts closer to kiss you, while the movement edges his cock along your entrance.

Six barely leaves your lips, you can still feel his breath, but he locks eyes with you as he tilts his hips and pushes the tip of his heated cock inside you.

Your gasp breaks into a moan, your eyes wide. You grasp at his neck with one hand while the other flutters to his hip.

Six throbs at your reaction. He leans back more, settling his hands on your breasts again, and uses the motion to push himself deeper. You keen at the fullness and watch as his eyes close with a groan. They fly open, black in lust, when he bottoms out. You shiver in your own desire, and he bends down over you, thinking you’re cold. He pushes a lock of hair behind your ear, and you wonder how in the world he could think he’s a bad man.

His hand grabs your left hip, holding you still, while the other hand covers your mouth. His thumb caresses your chin. Six drags his cock along your walls, reveling in the hot grip around him. He pulls out completely before easing back in, just as slow. Six is absorbing every little expression, every ridge inside you, every little sound you make.

Your chest lifts, wanting to be as close to him as possible. He’s almost fully seated inside you again when he suddenly thrusts hard, letting out a grunt as he does so. A small scream is muffled by his hand. He does it again, and it sends a shockwave up your body. He continues, rocking his hips into you faster, hitting some spot inside you that’s beginning to make you feel lightheaded. You’re making sounds without a care, knowing he’s got you there, too.

He withdraws from you with a strangled sound and rolls you onto your stomach. He pulls your hips toward him, raising you onto your hands and knees. You giggle, arching your back for him. A deep groan rolls in Six's chest at the sight of you so willing and pliant for him.

You feel his hands grip your hips, his fingers curling into your thighs, as he slowly re-enters your body. The invasion feels even better this time. He pushes himself inside again, his body rigid at first, savoring the way your walls let him in. His balls swing against your clit sinfully. You feel like you're being split in two, and you bite your forearm to soften your cry. Six does no such thing. His broken moan is not loud, but it reverberates in the room, setting fire to your body.

Six rolls his hips dramatically, wanting you to feel every inch of him. He sluggishly builds his speed, mesmerized by the way your body moves with his. You throw an arm out in front of you, bracing against the arm of the lounge. Six reaches forward to masturbate you, and you press your face into the cushion to whine, your face rubbing on the fabric with his rhythm.

Six leans over you, his thrusts never stopping, and carefully rips the scrunchie from its place. He grasps your hair again, wrapping it around his fist, and gently pulls you back until your head is on his shoulder. You can feel him grunting and panting on your damp skin.

Your hands reach behind you for some purchase and you find it in his hair. His fingers continue to work your nerves perfectly. You feel the cliff approaching, and you open your mouth to tell him, but he hits a particularly sensitive spot and you splinter. Sheer, white-hot pleasure rips through you. Your toes curl viciously. Your knees buckle and Six falls with you. You clamp one hand over your own mouth to dampen the torrent of cries. Your walls clench around Six as he continues to plunge himself into you, though faltering slightly. He’s breathing heavily in your ear, and you finally recognize that he’s murmuring.

“So good. Fuck, you’re so good.”

It’s as if he’s not even talking to you; Six is just telling the universe. You’re pretty sure he’s not aware he’s voicing his thoughts. You tilt your head back in search of his praising mouth, and he understands, surging forward to kiss you from behind. He drops your hair, letting it fan out along your back.

His movements begin to stutter and his hands massage your breasts. Into your shoulder, he grunts with each laborious thrust. You feel lightheaded with bliss. You look back at him again and he notices the mascara running from your lust filled eyes. Six could not be more aroused than this and it finally breaks him. He groans as he buries himself inside your tight heat, coming hard in a burst of final thrusts.

You both sit in this position for several moments, trying to catch your breath and hoping you've not been heard. He kisses your temple as he carefully leaves your body. You miss him already.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Six was gone. It had been nearly two months since your tryst in the fancy bathroom. Immediately after dressing that day, he had been called and sent off to some far reach of the world, and you'd heard nothing from him.

It was terrible. You had no closure, no explanation on what that was or if it meant anything. You went about your job as usual. Despite working for the self-proclaimed intelligence agency, you learned nothing of Six. You knew he was okay - he was too strong, too lucky for anything serious to have happened. No, what you worried about was whether or not you'd ever see him again. And why the thought of never seeing him again made your heart break. You eventually pushed every thought of Six away, trying to block out the memory of him.

One quiet evening, you sit munching on crackers at your desk. Only one track of fluorescent lighting illuminates your office, and the other desks are empty. Everyone else has gone home, but you sit hoping for some news of Six. Normally, you don’t sit here after hours, but it's Friday - the only day you allow yourself to think about him - and you'll have to spend the whole weekend in the metaphorical dark.

He's the Gray Man, you dumbass. You need to get over him. You feel like crying over your inability to let go of Sierra Six, but crying makes you feel worse, so only a few tears make it down your cheeks.

You gather your things and sling your bag over your shoulder. Stepping out into the brightly-lit hallway, you see a figure walking toward you from the far end.

You swipe at your tears, but you're sure the person saw your motion which was just as obvious. Your eyes are blurred, but you realize it's a tall, blonde man in a gray suit. His steps are quick, determined.

Your stomach seizes up in nervousness. Is it him? Surely not, there's no reason for him to be here now.

But as you blink away the blurriness, you recognize the strikingly blue eyes, the reserved smile. You lift a hand up in a timid wave, unsure how this is going to go.

You're not left waiting long as he closes the distance within seconds. He doesn't exactly feel comfortable making the first move, but he knows from your body language that you're taking his lead. So, as he reaches you, his hand comes up to cup your damp cheek.

"Hi." Your voice breaks on the short word. Was the gentle touch him trying to get back in your pants? Or did it mean something more?

"You were crying?" His eyebrows furrow.

"I- It was a rough day." You answer lamely. Then you ask curiously, "What are you doing here?"

"Is it not obvious?" Six drops his hand, confused. He thought he had a flashing neon light above him: Six is In Love.

"Everyone's gone home." You tell him, meaning the upper echelon who ran the Sierra program.

"I don't care about them. I'm- I'm here to see you." Six says it cautiously, now concerned about what you'll say.

Your voice is little more than a squeak, "For some company?"

Six's eyebrows furrow again, deeper this time. He frowns. "Not that kind. You think higher of me than that, don't you?"

"I did. I do. But I haven't heard from you in two months, Six. I'm not sure what happened that day. I don't know what you want and I can't stop wondering what you want." Tears well in your eyes again.

Relieved now, Six's laugh is more of a sigh. He cradles your face in his rough hands.

His blue eyes burn into yours as he spells it out, "I want you. You and your soft kindness. I spent two months away because I had to. But I also had to come back." It's clear he means for you. "As for what happened, well… you came on to me in that bathroom." He smirks.

You smile up at him, joy sparking in your heart, your hands holding onto his arms. You had tried to forget Six, but he's the kind of man you can't forget - despite his Gray Man reputation.

"You're glowing," Six says reverently.

#sierra six #sierra six x reader #court gentry #courtland gentry #fanfic #my fics #personal #smut #anon asks #the gray man #the gray man 2022 #ryan gosling #six #court gentry x you #court gentry x reader #fanfiction

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ravenloop · 1 year

Note

So glad that I stumbled upon your works I really love them! 🥰🥰🥰 If requests/reactions are still open I was wondering how Thor would react if he had a S/O who had ADHD, or was just neuro-spicy in general?Like someone who would make random noises, or quote random memes ya know.

Headcannons: Thor with an S/O who has ADHD

AN: Im so happy you love my writings! I hope this is what you wanted! I tried to make it as realistic as possible <3

-----------------------------------------

When you first met, he didn't really notice the small things you did like fidget or make little noises every so often.

Chances are, if he did notice then he just didn't mind them.

Only after you two decided that you were officially together and spent more time with one another did he really start noticing how common those little things you did were.

Still, he doesn't mind them. It's not something that bothers him.

And if you ever get embarrassed about the things you do, like randomly blurting out words, then he would remind you that (in a loving way) he doesn't care. Plus - he loves you, why would he choose you as his partner if he didn't?

Sometimes the things you say earn a chuckle from him though. You once got annoyed with Heimdall for making fun of you, and from the top of your head you told him, " shut up, you no-bitches boy."

Thor laughed long and hard at that, still hasn't let him live that one down yet. Heimdall also added you to his list of people he wants dead (it's a very long list).

Sometimes you also blurt out insults at the enemies you and Thor are fighting, he loves it because of course he does.

But on a more serious note, you often get very stressed out and annoyed with not being able to pay attention for long, or not being able to understand the simplest instructions.

It makes you feel useless, and Thor does his best to remind you that you are not all the negative things you think you are.

And he's not just saying that because he feels like he needs to - Thor really does see you opposite to what you see yourself negatively. When you think you're useless, he thinks you're the most important person. When you think you're annoying, Thor thinks You're delightful to be with.

It's not something you expected from him, but you definitely appreciate it.

He also realises that he finds your random noises cute, funny sometimes too. But mostly cute.

It's also easy for him to learn what your favourite things are, since most of the time when you find something you like, all your attention goes into it. He uses this to get you things he thinks you'd like.

It's always a surprise, but you love it. You have a little corner in your shared room dedicated to all your favourite things that Thor has brought you.

Sometimes you even tell him about the things he brought. All fascinating facts and details about them that you just can talk about for hours. It's likely he doesn't understand most of it, but he still listens for you.

In the end, he loves you and the little things you do. And he's happy to see you're starting to get more confident in yourself.

You hope to find a way to make it up to him, but he just says you being with him is all he needs.

#god of war #god of war ragnarök #god of war x reader #gow #gow Thor x reader #thor x reader #gow thor #reader insert #x reader

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bunwritesss · 9 months

Text

Rock On

Summary: Daryl always brings you adorable gifts from his runs, and one day, you get to return the favor.

Genre: Fluff

A/N: Hi! I'm so happy to write again, and in english nonetheless! <333

Anyway I still struggle writing Daryl, so I really hope he is not too OOC in this oneshot. I see him as softer with Sunshine!Reader, because he knows how sensitive they are, and he is so fond of them.

I apologize for any mistake, english is not my native language! ♡

Hope you'll enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it <3 And if you like this oneshot, I posted another one this morning 🥰

Have a nice day/night!

You loved going on runs. Going out of Alexandria for a while, having fun with your friends in shops filled with useful things to bring back to your community. And nearly dying two or three times in the process was honestly part of the fun, at this point. The adrenaline was exhilarating, and you cherished the sweet embraces you shared with members of your group after a danger. So when Maggie and Glenn asked if you wanted to come with them on a supply run, you immediatly said yes. And you were glad you did.

And in a corner of the shop, under piles of dust, you found a bunch of sunglasses. After going through all of them, you finally found what you were looking for. Sunglasses that Daryl Dixon would appreciate. So you wrapped them in your T-Shirts to protect them, and tucked them into your backpack with a huge grin.

First of all, you found an almost intact grocery store, bringing home lots of edible supplies. You were also the one discovering a brand new pasta maker in a corner of the shop, begging Glenn and Maggie to let you keep it in order to shut the mouth of your unbearable neighbour who talked about it day and night, and they accepted with great pleasure. In fact, everyone in the community would see their lives improved if Mrs Neudermeyer finally obtained the item she had been begging for for months.

And most importantly, you found a clothing store. There were a few T-shirts with pictures your favorite band on them, but also Spiderman pyjama pants for Carl, and new outfits for everyone. You were overflowing with joy while thinking about your ripped jeans and badly patched-up shirts back home, and about how much comfortable your new clothes would be. Clothes weren't considered a priority by everyone in your group, and a lack of diversity in the community's clothing section was a common subject in your current discussions.

Although Daryl never complained about anything, you were observant. You had seen him squinting his beautiful blue eyes everytime the sun was facing him, or how red they were afterwards. And you had always been told blue eyes were more sensitive to the light. So you had taken matters into your own hands, and were so proud of it. Daryl always tried his best bringing you things you would like from his runs, and finding gifts for him was so much harder, since the man was not a materialist. Now, you were finally able to return the favor.

As Glenn drove you back, the truck filled with your findings you took the sunglasses out of your backpack, fiddling with them. You were almost sure he would love them. They were the only ones without strasses or fluorescent patterns, and the only distinctive sign was a tiny A on the branch. You chuckled while thinking about the jokes you would make about said A, Maggie turning to you.

They had tried conversating with you as well, but gave up when they noticed your dreamy expression and how careful you were with the item. The drive home was not long, and when you got out of the car, Glenn prevented you from taking one of the box of supplies from the truck.

'Why are you laughing?'

'Thought about something funny.' You replied, and she smiled, turning back to continue her animated discussion with Glenn.

'Go give Daryl his gift, you'll help us after.'

You opened your mouth to thank him but he simply winked, turning away to take a box. So you started jogging to Rick, seeing him wandering around. If someone knew where Daryl was, it was him. Or Carol, but your friend was probably busy with the ladies of Alexandria at the moment. After a few questions about the run, Rick finally gave you Daryl's location with a knowing smile, and you walked as fast as possible, so excited to see his reaction. Focused on your steps, you would probably have walked right into him if he had not stopped you, a steady hand on your shoulders.

'Easy, trouble. What's getting ya so excited?'

He gave you one of his fond smiles, seeing you so focused and proud. He knew you were back from a run, and seeing you unharmed was making him happy.

'I brought you a gift!' You proudly declared.

His eyes widened in surprise, but his neutral expression quickly came back.

'Is that so?'

You nodded with even more pride in your eyes, taking the pair of sunglasses out of your pocket and delicately dropping it into his hand. He immediatly brought it closer to his eyes, examinating it. You bit you lip, suddenly extremely anxious about his appreciation of the present.

'Ya think I'm a rockstar?'

You looked up just in time to see the crooked smile he was giving you, and you shrugged, a faint blush appearing on your cheeks.

'I think your eyes are sensitive to the sun and it's time for you to take care of them.'

And as he was putting them on, you added :

'Plus, you'd look adorable with these on.'

He scoffed, turning to you. You were right. He was absolutely gorgeous with the sunglasses on. Uneven bangs were framing the accessory, and you refrained yourself from tucking them away.

He took the sunglasses off, delicately playing with them. He was holding them with the most care in the world, as if they were made out of glass, and you could barely contain your joy. He liked your present! He squinted at the letter on the branch, his eyes going from the item to you.

'How do I look?'

'Cool as hell. It'll look even cooler when you're on your bike!'

'A? Why A?'

You pretended to be confused.

'For your name?'

As he furrowed his eyebrows, you continued, barely contening your smirk.

'Isn't your name Aryl Dixon?'

He rolled his eyes, fakely annoyed, a little smile betraying his whole act. He could never be annoyed at you anyway, and you were well aware of that.

Not wanting to overwhelm him with your excitement, you slowly backed away.

'They look good. Thank ya kid. Ya did good out there, happy to see ya in one piece.'

'I'm so happy you like them!'

'I'm going to help the others carry the rest of what we brought to inventory! See you later!'

He put the glasses on his head, forming devil horns with his right hand. You replied with the same gesture, happily walking back to the others. Your grin did not go unnoticed, Maggie being the only one to say something about it. She took a box from the truck, approaching you.

'I'm taking your huge smile as the sign he did not like his present?'

You laughed, taking the huge box of hygiene products Maggie was giving you.

'Oh, he hated it.'

#daryl x reader #the walking dead #twd #daryl dixon #sunshine reader #daryl fluff

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lyranova · 9 months

Note

Heya! Love your works! I was wondering if you could do a Yuno x reader one with genre hurts- comfort? Here's the prompt list:

Fluff (5.“Home stopped being a place when you entered my life.”)

Fluff (6. “You should probably go home.” “But I’m already home.”)

Angst (1. “I’m leaving.” “Of course you are, that’s all you know how to do.”)

General (3. “I love you.” “You shouldn’t.”)

Again, love your works and id love to see more of them! Ty! <3

(Also, sorry if my english isnt really good, its not my first language, haha. Sorry if this is a bit too much too! ^^')

Hiya anon! Of course I can, I'm sorry this came out more...angsty then hurt/comfort 😅, but I still hope you enjoy! And thank you so much, I'm so glad you enjoy my works that makes me happy to hear 🥺💕! And don't worry about your english it's perfect and is very good 🥰!

Word Count: 468

Warnings: Angst

------

“ I love you.’’

Yuno stared at them with a blank expression, he knew how nervous and hesitant they were to confess, and he had been seeing the signs that they had feelings for him beyond that of friendship. And he had been trying to put distance between them, but they just…completely ignored it.

“ You shouldn’t,’’ Yuno said coldly, he was doing his best to hurt them. He wanted them to have their heart broken, the reason? Because…he wasn’t good enough for them yet. He wanted to become Captain, and then eventually Wizard King, and once he achieved those things then he would consider himself good enough for them.

But right now, Yuno felt that he was lacking.

“ Why shouldn’t I?’’ They asked, their voice firm and determined, and Yuno sighed.

‘Please understand…I’m not good enough for you as I am now, please just wait a little longer, or find someone else who is good enough for you now.’ Yuno screamed at them in his head, but not a single word left his lips, instead he just continued staring blankly at them. Even has his heart clenched painfully tight in his chest.

“ Because you shouldn’t,’’ Yuno said, his tone continuing to be cold and distant, and he felt his heart clench even tighter as tears of frustration welled up in his friend's eyes.

“ You should go home now,” Yuno said softly as he turned around and began to walk away, but he stopped when he heard them sniffle behind him.

“ But, I already am home,” They said softly as they sniffled and wiped the tears from their eyes. “ Home stopped being a place the moment you entered my life.” They finished quietly, and Yuno brought a fist to his chest and grabbed his shirt tightly.

This, breaking their heart, was absolutely painful. At their words, he nearly dropped the cold act, ran towards them to scoop them up in his arms and tell them that he felt the same way and had for a while.

But he stopped himself.

“ I’m leaving, and I’ll pretend we never had this conversation.” Yuno threw over his shoulder as began to walk away again.

“ Of course you are, that’s all you know how to do.” They said coldly as they finished wiping their tears and watched him walk away. “ You’re such a cold-hearted jerk.” They added quietly under their breath, but Yuno still heard them.

Once Yuno rounded the corner, he leaned his back against the wall for support before quietly sliding down to the ground. He hated that he had to break their heart, especially considering he loved them just as much as they loved him. But he needed to become good enough, he needed to become stronger to protect them. They just needed to wait a little longer…just a little longer.

-----

Thank you all so much for reading and I hope you all have a good day~!

#asks #anon🌟#black clover #black clover oneshot #black clover fanfiction #black clover fanfic #black clover x reader #black clover x you #black clover x y/n #yuno grinberryall #yuno x reader #yuno x you #yuno x y/n #yuno black clover #black clover yuno

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forever-rogue · 2 years

Note

Idk if you're taking requests still but I was wondering. If we could get Eddie and reader who've been friends for years. After each go through bad breakups they decided to be friends with benefits which eventually leads to them both catching feelings.

AN | I saw this and went…pain 🥰 but there might also be fluff…and a happy ending because that’s what Eddie deserves!

Warnings | Language

Pairing | Eddie x Fem!Reader

Word Count | 4.6k

Masterlist | Main, Eddie

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“What’s up with you?” Eddie’s voice cut through your thoughts, and caused you to jump slightly. He strode up and hopped onto the rickety old picnic table next to you, “didn’t mean to scare you, princess.”

“It’s alright,” you sighed before scooting closer to him and resting your head on his shoulder, “you’re the only person I really want to see right now anyway.”

“You want to talk about it?” he leaned his head on top of yours and rested his hand on your thigh, “you’ve seemed off the past few days. It’s not like you to…shut me out. You’re my best friend and it…sucks to see you so down and I just want to try and make it better.”

“I know,” you put your hand on top of his and gave it a tight squeeze, “it’s stupid. It literally feels so dumb to be this upset about it. But, ugh…Kyle broke up with me.”

“What?!”

“Yeah,” you shrugged lightly, “he just…told me he doesn’t want to be with me anymore and the fact that I found him sucking face with Ashley later that same day didn’t really help. So…yeah. I’m sure that’s been going on for some time.”

“What a fucking-”

“It’s fine,” you pulled your head from his shoulder and turned to look at him. His heart broke when he saw that your eyes were glossy with tears before a few rolled down your cheeks. He reached up and gently wiped them away, “I mean, it’s not fine, it really fucking sucks but I guess I’m glad at least things didn’t get further than they did. He could have just told me that he found someone else he wanted to be with instead of lying to me. I can’t stand…lying.”

“I’m sorry,” he cradled your face in his hands before pressing a kiss to your forehead, ‘I’m not opposed to beating him up, I’m just saying.”

“Eddie,” you laughed lightly, a small smile ticking up the corners of your mouth, “it’s okay. I’ve got you, don’t I? What else could I need other than my best friend? I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Seriously,” he agreed with a small laugh, “me too, princess.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Eddie had been off. Just as you had been Kyle had initially broken up with you so it didn’t take much to put the pieces together. He hadn’t been at school for a few days, hadn’t called for a Hellfire meeting, or answered your calls. But you weren’t able to let him just completely spiral, you were going to be there for him, as you always had been, as he always had been for you.

“Edward Munson,” you knocked on the door to his trailer, not bothered to care about how loud you were being. You waited nervously, bouncing back and forth on your heels as you waited for him. After a few long moments when you didn’t hear anything, you knocked again, “Eddie, I’m not leaving! Let me in or I will crawl through your bedroom window. This is a threat!”

You waited again, and after a few moments you heard his heavy footsteps heading over until he unlocked the door and poked his head out. He looked…horrible and it broke your heart to see him like that. He always gave and gave and gave to you and everyone else, but he rarely took, so rarely asked for anything.

“Eddie,” you didn’t hesitate to wrap your arms around him, and pull him into a bone crushing hug. You rubbed his back gently as he buried his face into your shoulder and sniffled lightly. It wasn’t long before you felt tears soak into the fabric of your shirt, “it’s okay, my honey boy. I’ve got you. I’ve always got you.”

“I know,” he whispered softly, “I know you do.”

You held him for a bit, until he was able to get it all out before pulling him inside and out of the cold. Without even asking, you took his hand and led him to his bedroom, motioning for him to get into bed. Once he was settled, you kicked off your shoes and followed suit, settling down next to him. You laid so you were facing him, gently reaching over and brushing some of his roguish waves out of his face.

“I’ve been worried about you,” you whispered softly, “especially when you didn’t answer any of my calls. Do you want to talk about it? It’s okay if you don’t or you’re not ready, I’m here.”

“Stacy,” his voice cracked as he spoke about a few beats of silence, “broke up with me. Said it was never serious and just wanted…she just wanted the drugs and to find out what it was like being with the freak.”

“Fucking bitch,” you inhaled sharply, feeling the rage seeping into your blood, “can I…full disclosure - full honesty?”

“Always.”

“I hated her,” you admitted quickly, trying to gauge his reaction, “she treated you like shit, Eds. Even if you didn’t see it. You deserve so much better - you deserve everything. Not some stuck up bitch that only cares about herself.”

“Full honesty?”

“Yes.”

“Kyle was an absolute idiot,” he confessed as you couldn’t hold your giggles, “so stupid and dumb and you, princess, absolutely will find someone better.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he promised, “and we’ll always have each other.”

“Of course,” you agreed, “do you wanna smoke and talk shit?”

“Abso-fucking-lutely.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Is there anything that would make you love me less?” you were sitting on the floor of your bedroom, leaning against your bed as you painted your nails and Eddie flipped through some random music magazine. You heard him stop flipping for a moment before he shifted so he was looking down at you.

“Umm…no?” his pretty face was marred with confusion, “wait…like maybe murder? But I mean I guess that depends on the circumstances.”

“I have a proposition for you,” jamming the brush back into the polish, you set it to the side and waved your hands to get the polish drying faster. You shifted so you were in front of Eddie, who was curiously watching you, “I don’t…I almost don’t want to say anything because I don’t want to…I don’t want to ruin anything. You’re my best friend, the only person that gets me, the only one that keeps me sane in this crazy world, and I don’t think I could ever bear the thought of you not having you in my life.”

“Okay…you won’t? What could you possibly ask that would change anything?” he reached over and brushed a few locks of hair out of your face before laughing lightly, “come on, princess. You’ve got me worried now.”

“I was thinking…I, ugh…it’s just…fuck,” your face felt like it was on fire under his intense gaze, “doyouwannahavesexwithme?”

He paused for a moment, eyebrows raising before his brow furrowed in confusion. Had you really just asked what he thought you had? His mouth opened and closed wordlessly and you grew worried that you’d absolutely overstepped any boundaries, “w-what did you say?”

“Umm…do you want to have sex with me?” you repeated more slowly as he looked at you incredulously, “it’s not…I mean for like a friends with benefits thing, you know? Like…I know you don’t like me like that, and I don’t blame you, it’s whatever. But you know, we’ve both just been through bad breakups and it could be…fun, ya know?”

Your second little comment had caught him guard as much as your initial question and he swallowed thickly. He decided to ignore that little part before gathering up his thoughts, “okay, let me get this super clear - you want us to have sex? Like…as friends.”

“I-it was just an idea,” you stammered nervous as you stared at your drying nails, “obviously it would only be if you want to, but please don’t feel obligated to give say yes and just give me a pity fuck. I only want to do this if you want to do it too.”

“Why me?”

“Why…what? Why not you, Eds?” you laughed softly as you tilted your head to the side, “I trust you, you’re my best friend. We know each other so well, I thought maybe that could translate into whatever else we do. Plus, you’re hot, you have to know you’re hot, right?”

“I…umm,” he ran a hand through his hair nervously. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to have sex with you - oh, he did, he had wanted to for a long time. But more importantly, he wanted everything with you; not just sex but the whole relationship thing and all that entailed, “I-I…you’re so fucking pretty.”

“There’s no need to flatter me,” you insisted softly, “so…ugh, it’s just a thought. You know, all the benefits but no strings and no feelings - besides our usual best friend feelings. But I don’t want to do this if it’s going to even possibly ruin our friendship, Eds. I’d rather be celibate for the rest of my life than lose you.”

“No strings, no feelings?”

“Right - and we stop as soon as either of us starts seeing anyone else,” you caught his eye and found that his expression was unreadable but eventually he nodded slowly.

“Yeah, right, that makes sense,” he agreed, “umm…okay. Okay. Let’s do it then.”

“Really? Eddie, I hope you-”

But he cut you off before you could say anything else, leaning into you to lightly brush his lips against yours. You paused for a moment, caught off guard by his sudden response and looked at him with wide doe eyes that made him weak. You looked at him and he offered you a cute little smile before you sat up and gently took his face in your hands.

There was only a moment of pause before you crashed your lips onto his, kissing him messily as the two of you tried to find your rhythm. It was a bit clumsy at first, but somehow neither of you minded, even when you accidentally clicked your teeth and bumped noses. At one point you broke apart, looking at each other before giggling softly.

“C’mere,” he helped you onto the bed and quickly pulled you back to his lips, finding that it was easy to get lost in you. He’d imagined how it would be to kiss you at least a million times and yet it still didn’t compare to what it was actually like, “you taste like heaven.”

“Eddie,” you laughed, feeling your face warm before you kissed him again, “please touch me.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The next few months turned into…more than you have ever dreamed of. It was like getting all of Eddie, your best friend and your lover…without the relationship part. And sure, that’s what you really wanted, but you’d never admit that to him. You had already been afraid that proposing the whole friends with benefits thing was going to be too much, and you didn’t want to push him away completely. Somehow it felt like that would be what happened if you actually suggested dating. So you pushed that idea down and far away where it would lie forever.

“Hey,” Eddie kissed the side of your head before sitting down next to you at your usual table in the cafeteria. You looked at him with a giant smile and oh. How that caused him to melt, “I managed to snag a few extra pieces of pizza from the lunch lady that likes me. Bone app the teeth, m’lady.”

“What a sweetheart,” you grabbed the soda he pushed towards you, opening it with a loud pop, “hey, are we still on for tomorrow night? I thought that maybe after Hellfire we could catch a movie or go to dinner, or both maybe.”

“Umm, you know what…I can’t actually,” he refused to look at you, instead focusing on picking at the pizza on his plate, “I forgot that I have…band practice?”

“Are you asking me or telling me?” you raised an eye at him, wondering what had suddenly gotten into him.

“Telling,” he cleared his throat, “sorry. I completely spaced.”

“Okay,” you weren’t going to question him too much. If something was going on you were sure he’d tell you eventually, “do you want to hang out after? You can spend the night at mine if you want.”

“It’ll be really late…”

“That’s never stopped us before, Eddie,” you pulled his plate away, causing him to make a small sound of surprise, “we’ve been best friends for years, Eddie Munson. We’ve spent probably a thousand late nights together and it’s never been an issue. Are you sure everything’s alright?”

“Yeah,” he insisted quietly through a tight lipped smile, “of course. Hey, don’t worry princess, I’ll make it up to you soon.”

“There’s nothing to make up for,” you put your hand under his chin and gently turned his face towards yours. There was a light pink flush dusting his cheeks, “I just want to make sure you’re alright, honey boy. You know I’m here for you no matter what. You’re the most important person in my life and I hate the idea that you’re dealing with something alone.”

“It’s fine, I’m all good,” he wrapped his fingers around your wrist before gently pulling your hand away, “just tired and busy.”

“Okay,” you decided to drop it rather than push him further and make it worse than it was, “okay.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

But things were definitely not okay, despite his initial instance that they would be. He’d spend the next several weeks distancing himself from you. It wasn’t in an inherently rude way, but he managed to avoid you, ducking away when he saw you coming, ignoring your calls, pretending he wasn’t home when you stopped by, and always seeming to be busy and wrapped up in whatever he was doing when you were around.

At first you believed that he really was busy and just short on time - after all, why would your best friend lie to you? But then, when you realized he was still hanging out with his other friends, still managing to goof off, and home when you stopped by and he didn’t answer the door. That’s when you started to take things personally. What could you have possibly done to upset him? Nothing had changed, nothing had happened; nothing that you were aware of at least.

It broke your heart; not only was Eddie your best friend, he was also your love, even if he didn’t fully realize that. Not only were you losing your best friend, you felt like you were losing everything.

It came to a point, several weeks after he had been so initially weird that you couldn’t take it any longer. You’d ducked out of class a few minutes early so you could wait for Eddie and follow him wherever he had been going for lunch. As soon as you spotted him, you carefully padded after him, making sure to remain completely quiet. He went to the closed little spot in the woods just behind the school, which did not surprise you in the slightest. You were planning on sneaking up, but the loud snapping of a twig underneath your feet caught his attention.

He whipped around, eyes widening when he realized it was you, “w-what are you doing here?”

“Me?” you sighed in exasperation, “I’m trying to talk to my best fucking friend, Eddie! You’ve barely spoken more than a few words to me in the last couple of weeks. You’ve never done that before. We’ve never…gone through anything like that. The longest we haven’t talked has been maybe a day. But it’s been weeks.”

“I’ve just been busy-”

“Bullshit,” you shook your head and walked closer to him, poking him squarely in the chest, “I’ve you seen with the others, I know when you purposely ignore my calls, and how you’ve been practically running in the other direction as soon as you see me. If I did something, tell me, please just tell me so I can try and fix it. But I can’t stand this silent treatment.”

“Look,” he ran a hand through his messy waves in exasperation before sighing heavily, “it’s not you-”

“It’s me. Okay, Eddie, sure.”

“You want the truth? Full honesty?” he threw up his hands in defeat as you crossed your arms over your chest and nodded fervently, “I don’t want to…I can’t sleep with you anymore. Okay? I tried to just avoid it and hope that you would drop it, but…fuck it’s only made things worse.”

“You can’t? Or you won’t?” you were surprised by his confession; the two of you always had a good time when you were together, in bed or not, “if you didn’t want to have sex with me, you could have said no in the first place. We never had to…”

“I wanted to,” he confessed, which left you reeling an even more confused, “fuck, baby, I’ve wanted to for a long time. But you…you said no strings and no feelings and I can’t…I can’t continue to pretend that I don’t have feelings for you.”

“Of course you have feelings for me,” your eyes widened, heart pounding as your mind raced with all the possible meanings of what he was saying, “y-you’re my best friend. You have best friend feelings for me.”

“No,” he shook his head before groaning lightly, “no, I don’t. You know what I’m trying to say and I know…tell me you don’t feel the same. Tell me and we’ll drop this and pretend it never happened. We’ll go back to exactly how things were before we started having sex. But I need to hear you tell me.”

“Eddie,” you swallowed the lump in your throat, tears stinging at the back of your eyes, “you don’t…you don’t like me like that.”

“Yeah,” he insisted, “I do. And I think deep down you’ve always known it - fuck, we’ve always known it. Tell me I’m wrong.”

“You’re wrong,” the words stung as they left your lips. You regretted it as soon as you said them. Eddie’s face was a mask before it fell completely; he looked utterly devastated. It broke your heart and you hated that you couldn’t admit you felt the same way all because you were scared, “you’re wrong, Eddie. You’re my best friend and that’s…what we are. We’re best friends.”

“You mean that?” his voice cracked as he looked up at the sky to keep back his own tears.

“Yeah,” you lied, “I do.”

“Okay,” he was biting the inside of his cheek so hard that he was soon tasting blood, “okay. Alright, we’ll pretend this never happened, that none of the last couple of months have happened and just go right back to how things used to be. That’s what you want, right?”

“Mhmm,” it was a weak and pathetic sound, and Eddie brushed past you without another word. You were tempted to go and run after him, but instead you found yourself rooted to the ground, unable to do anything but watch him go.

Now you had really ruined everything. All because you were scared, rather than honest with him.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It had been seven whole days since you’d lied to Eddie about your feelings. Seven long, hard days. It could have been seven days of heavenly bliss but you just couldn’t get over yourself and be honest. It was all your own fault. You hadn’t been able to sleep, eat, or focus on anything. Eddie occupied almost every single waking thought and he’d invaded your dreams too. You weren’t able to get any peace; you were sure Eddie was no better off. You hadn’t seen him at school for a few days, but when you did see him he looked terrible.

Fuck. You should have just been honest. Instead you ruined everything.

But that didn’t mean you couldn’t try and make things better. You could at least give him some sort of peace, or even closure because you highly doubted he wanted to remain friends. The thought alone was enough to break your heart but you had no one to blame but yourself.

That’s how you found yourself, jumping out of your car and running through the pouring rain at midnight, to pound on his door. Realistically you knew you should have waited, or something, but you couldn’t. It was now or never and you couldn’t just say never. Not with him, not with Eddie.

“Hold on!” you heard his voice shout before his footsteps came closer and closer to the door. It was only a few seconds until you heard the door unlock and open. His face flickered from annoyance to surprise and confusion, eventually settling on upset. He was still dressed, so at least you knew you hadn’t woken him up, “what are you doing here?”

“Eddie-”

“Whatever you could possibly have to say to me could have waited until school o-or something. Just go home,” he was ready to shut the door but you wedged your foot in the door to stop him, “please.”

“I know you hate me, and honestly I don’t blame you. I hate myself right now, but it’s my own fault, so that’s on me,” you tears now mixed with the rain droplets still clinging to your skin, “and I know you don’t want to see me or listen to me or whatever and I get that. As soon as I get this off my chest I’m leaving and you’ll never have to speak to me or me again.”

“That’s not what I-”

“I lied, Eddie. I was lying when you asked me if I had feelings for you,” you admitted with a sharp exhale, watching his eyebrows raise in surprise, “I’m sorry, I’m so fucking sorry. I should have just told you the truth then and there. Things would be…they’d be so different now.”

“Why didn’t you? It would have been so easy…it’s just me. Why would you lie to me?” His eyes were glossy now too as he tried to make sense of it all.

“I was scared. I was so fucking scared and worried that if I told you how I really felt that you wouldn’t want to be my friend anymore, that you wouldn’t…that you wouldn’t want me,” as soon as the words were out in the open it felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest, “I couldn’t deal with the idea that you wouldn’t want me so I lied to save my own feelings. I thought that maybe you were saying you had feelings for me and if I said it too, things just wouldn’t turn out and I thought I could keep you as my friend rather than anything else. I’m so stupid though and I’ve ruined everything.”

“I wouldn’t have…I told you how I felt, how I’ve felt for a long time,” he was getting frustrated and you didn’t blame him, “all you had to do was be honest with me!”

“I know and I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t,” you wiped at the tears that were running down your cheeks and blurring your vision, “the truth is…I wasn’t ready to admit that I’ve been in love with you for so long, so deeply that it was the only thing that mattered. But that's the truth, Eddie, full honesty. And I ruined everything by just…being a pathetic coward and I don’t expect you to ever forgive me. I just…I had to tell you. That you were right and I’m an idiot.”

“You could have…I’ve been in love with you since we met,” he admitted as your heart constricted in your chest, “there were a million ways I’ve said it and you’ve said it without ever saying those words. When we had our break ups I thought maybe it was a sign, or something stupid like that, that it was supposed to be us finally. And then you asked me to have sex and that you wanted no feelings and I thought maybe it could work. But the truth is, full honesty, I could never have sex with you without those feelings. Why did you ask me if you were scared?”

“I thought maybe it would help me get over you,” you cried, “I thought that maybe if I got to have all of you for once, it would be easier for me to put my feelings in check and get over you. But it didn’t work. Not from the moment you kissed me. It just made things worse, made me realize just how fucking much you mean to me.”

“I wish you would have just told me.”

“Me too,” you shrugged lightly with a small, bitter laugh at yourself, “here I thought everything was going to work out, and I fucked it all up. And now I don’t even have my best friend anymore, and I don’t want to think about a life without you, but I did this to myself - to you. And I’m sorry, Eddie, I’m so sorry.”

The two of you remained silent for a few long, agonizing moments before you decided it was time to leave, “I-I’m going to go. I’m sorry for bugging you but I just had to tell you now before I lost the nerve again. I’m sorry for…everything. But at least now you know.”

You’d turned to leave but before you could make it down the steps of the trailer’s porch, you felt him take your hand and pull you back. You turned around to face him, finding that he had tears running down his cheeks too.

“Eddie?”

He gently took your face in his hands before kissing you. It caught you completely off guard and after a moment you pulled back and put your hands on his chest to lightly push him back, “w-what are you doing?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” he laughed nervously, “kissing you?”

“Why?” you asked seriously as a small little smile tugged up the corner of his mouth, “I…don’t understand.”

“I’m in love with you,” it felt so good for him to finally be able to say it out loud without worry or fear and knowing that you loved him too, “and you’re in love with me. Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Then let’s not throw this away,” he insisted, “you are, first and foremost, my best friend, my other half, the best thing in my life. The fact that I’m in love with you and vice versa just makes it…perfect. I’m not giving up ten years of friendship and our entire future together because of a small mistake. Yes, it hurt me when you said you didn’t have feelings for me, that I was wrong. It hurt me a fucking lot. But I…I’m so in love with you. And I want this, but only if you do too. The best things in life - you - are worth fighting for.”

“Eddie,” he reached up and gently wiped your tears away, his thumb stroking your cheek, “you are everything to me. Always have been and always will be. And I…I’ll never lie to you again. I want this, I’ve always wanted this - you. I just…I love you.”

“I love you,” he promised as he pulled you close so your nose was brushing against his. You both giggled nervously before tentatively leaning in so your lips were almost touching, “I’m going to kiss you now, just so you know, so it’s clear what’s going on here.”

“You’re never going to let me live that down are you?”

“Not a chance, princess,” you could feel him smiling against your lips now, “never.”

“Good,” you closed the small distance and kissed him quickly, “honey boy. Please kiss me more.”

“With pleasure.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x fem!reader #joseph quinn #joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn x reader #st

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restlessmaknae · 4 months

Text

trajectory [keeho]

Sometimes, people just fall apart to fall apart.

➳ Characters: Keeho x female!reader/you

➳ Genre: slice of life, real-life bittersweet, friends drifting away

➳ Words: 1.9k

➳ Warning: mention of losing a pet, stress, insecurities

➳ A/N: The story was inspired by this part in one of Keeho's lives. Also, thank you so much for you all you for supporting my works this year! Wishing each and every one of you a very happy, balanced and healthy New Year! 🥰

➳ P1Harmony taglist: @dat-town, @tranquilpetrichor, @laaylaazyy, @americanokisses, @kuleo26, @hyu-won, @wccycc, @sunooslover, @littlestartonightsposts, @koishua, @seungincore, @s00buwu

➳ Check out: my P1Harmony masterlist

“It’s me.”

The way Keeho shouted this exact sentence into the intercom had never changed. Year after year, time after time, that had always been his signature way of introducing himself. Let it be you or your parents who had picked up your apartment’s door phone, he had always announced his arrival casually and proudly - his tone indicating that he had been glad to enter your home.

You didn’t think that such a familiar sentence - a habit of his by that time - could prick at your skin like a needle pushing through the layers. At first, it didn’t seem to hurt, but then the pain hit out of the blue and all at once - like the waves crashing down on a shore at the beginning of an abrupt summer downpour.

“I’ll go downstairs. Stay there,” you forced the words out, your voice coming out raspy and feeble. You could hear the hesitation in the line - for you had usually let him in instead of going outside to meet him downstairs -, but you had to do it this way. You could feel it coming, and you didn’t want to attach such a conversation to the image of Keeho and you in your bedroom. It would be better if it was played out somewhere else. You had never contacted each other by saying that ‘you needed to talk’ before you would meet up, but now it was time, and you both knew the weight of the upcoming conversation.

“Okay. I’ll be here,” came the answer nevertheless, and you yanked your hand away from the intercom. You took in a deep breath, then told your parents that you would step outside for a bit before opening and closing the front door behind you.

You walked down the stairs instead of taking the elevator, prolonging the conversation as long as you could. As you took one step after another, flashbacks of your teenage years spent with Keeho swang round and round on the carousel of your memories: talking under the watching eyes of the moon, looking for shooting stars on humid summer nights during summer camps that resulted in more mosquito bites than actual shooting stars; having Disney movie marathons on the couch in your flat that was so worn-out by now that a new one was already on its way; checking out so-called Instagram-worthy places with Keeho, roaming around Seoul only to get scared by a passing black cat in the dark, have the worst latte of your life or end up with a sprained ankle on Keeho’s part when he had slipped on a cobblestone; attempting to make viral TikTok recipes only to end up with inedible masses of questionably-looking food and turning Keeho’s family’s kitchen into a warzone; recording TikTok challenges to post onto his account, the one that he said would go viral one day and you wouldn’t need to have a 9-5, you could work for him.

As you turned a corner and passed another floor, brief flashes of tears raining down on notebook pages, talking through sleepless nights worrying about your senior exams, sobs over the passing of your beloved pet and pep talks following outbursts of teenage awkwardness regarding your teenage body and insecurities came to mind; ones that you would have liked to forget, but still cherished so much because they proved you why you were best friends.

Best friends. The word felt like a flicker of light in the darkness now when it had been a huge torch lighting up your life for so long. Your friendship with Keeho had gone through many ups and downs, but the care and empathy you had towards each other had never changed, and that’s why you wanted to talk; because you didn’t want to leave him hanging, you wanted to talk about how you were doing now, and whether you had a future together anymore.

The truth is, when one becomes friends with someone, they don’t think about the end. They might even find it impossible that it could ever end. You had been the same. When you had been going to school together, seeing each other almost everyday, and planning your future in senior year, probably closer than you had ever been before, the thought that it might fade into bittersweet memories one day had never crossed your mind. Yet, here you were, barely speaking, barely catching up, barely seeing each other.

Even though you had gone to different cities to study after high school, you had made it work in the beginning. You had gone back to your hometown at the same time, you had planned trips to visit the other in their uni’s city, and you had talked as if nothing had happened. Yet, semesters went by, and the conversations died down slowly like a candle burning down, the visits back home seemed to never work out at the same time, and even if you talked, it seemed like you had nothing to say to each other, as if you had become strangers in each other’s life. The worst was that there had been nothing grande about it, there had been no big fight, no big misunderstanding, no big secrets, it just all… faded.

Just like the colours of the sky faded into a messy deep-blue when you stepped outside of the apartment complex, and came face-to-face with Keeho. He tried with a smile, but you could tell that it wasn’t genuine.

“Hi!”

Awkward. Unfamiliar. Tense. Everything you had been feeling for some time now came crashing down on you now that you were face-to-face with him. As if the physical body of his made his existence and his footprint in your life more prominent. More painful. More unbearable.

With a heavy sigh, you suggested going to the nearby playground where you had frequently sat on the swings, talking about everything that came to your mind. Now, nothing seemed right, nothing seemed fitting for this occasion.

“I… I don’t know how to start,” you blurted out feebly, playing with your fingers mindlessly just so you could take your mind off the weight on your chest.

“Then, don’t,” came the answer immediately, but Keeho cleared his throat and made an addition before you could question his words. “I mean, we can absolutely just sit here and wait until you feel ready.”

You weren’t sure that you could ever be ready for such a conversation. You knew that Keeho always appreciated your honesty, and wanted you to tell him if you thought he took his jokes too far or he made a hurtful comment or anything of the sort, but you still felt like you were the bad guy now for wanting to bring it up, for wanting to talk about it. On the other hand, the facts spoke for themselves, the lack of messages, the lack of conversations, the lack of hang-outs…

“I just… I don’t know how to describe it, but I think you feel it, too,” you started, truly hoping that it was true, that he felt the same way. He had to, you told yourself. “We’re different and our friendship is different, and everything is different… and I’m not sure I feel as comfortable around you as before. Or that we have things to talk about.”

Your voice was resigned instead of accusing for you didn’t want to start a fight, you didn’t want to start a war. You had too much of a history to accuse him of something that he probably did unintentionally, and he wasn’t at fault. It wasn’t him who made you feel uncomfortable, it was the situation itself. It was that pang in your chest, that twist inside your stomach when you looked at the pictures of you and Keeho on your bedroom shelf, it was that deep, deep feeling inside that it wasn’t the same anymore, and you missed what you had, but you weren’t sure that you could ever get it back.

“You know what I mean, right?”

You looked at him for the first time since the start of your conversation, and saw something flash across his eyes at your question. Something familiar, something close, something deeply connected to a part of you. Keeho looked at you like that when he was about to say something that would put your mind at ease, and when there was a twitch in the corner of his lips, you knew that he was about to speak his mind.

“Yeah, I get you. I think we’re having such different experiences and we live away from each other, we have different friend groups, and it’s just, as you’ve mentioned, different,” he mentioned just as calmly as you had. Neither of you wanted to hurt the other or accuse the other. You were having a conversation, not an argument. “Like Taylor Swift said, everything has changed,” he added as his lips began to curl upwards, and that… that was just so Keeho-like, you found yourself cracking a smile.

“That’s better,” he smiled back at you, fondly and affectionately, and the years of your friendship was squashed into this smile, one that you would never question was genuine. “I don’t want you to feel bad about it. I feel the same way, and I think friendships have their own trajectory. They begin, they soar and they eventually come down. Sometimes… there’s no reason for that, it just happens.”

Seen. Heard. Understood. Despite the jokester he was, Keeho was also very wise, and he handled problems and concerns maturely. For that reason, you should have known that he would understand you, but somehow, you didn’t want to dare that he would, or maybe you wanted him to disagree, to see it differently… so that you could save the friendship, but as he had said, maybe your friendship was coming down to the ground like an air-balloon, and it would never take off again. Or maybe it would, but right now, it just didn’t seem right.

“I had a feeling you wanted to talk about this, and truthfully, I was thinking of bringing it up too, but it just never came to it. So thank you for speaking up about it,” Keeho broke the momentary silence that fell upon the two of you as you were pondering and pondering. You smiled at him, reminiscing about him, about the past, present and the future, and your voice was confident and genuine when you said:

“Me too. Thank you for everything.”

As you sat there beside each other on the swings just like you used to, you saw the old Keeho in him and felt like the old you in that moment. When he stood up to give you a hug while calling you by the nickname he had given you, you reciprocated it, bittersweet yet grateful. Grateful for the you that you had become because of him, grateful for the way he understood still, and grateful for the lesson he taught you that day.

Sometimes friends just fell apart to fall apart - as a part of their friendship’s trajectory, but that was just one of the many trajectories that lined their lives in the past, present and the future.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this story of mine! Let me know what you think!

If you want to read more stories of mine, let it be for P1Harmony or for other artists, consider signing up for my taglist here.

Hope you have a lovely day/night! Take care! ❤️

#p1harmony scenarios #p1harmony imagines #p1harmony x reader #p1harmony x you #keeho imagines #keeho scenarios #keeho x reader #keeho x you #p1harmony angst #keeho angst

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rat-typewriter · 10 months

Note

Hello! Just read your Clumsy fic with Leon x Reader. It was very good and very true to my daily life😅

I was wondering if you do any angst? Like severely injured and the other person(in this case Leon or the Reader) is extremely worried and trying to save them. Ultimately you can choose if they die or not, but I just love the comfort when the other is dying or bleeding out.

Keep up the amazing work! And also may I draw a scene if you end up writing it? Please and thank you🥰🥰😚

Live to see another day - Leon Kennedy x fem!Reader

notes: ok so remember when RE4 was still relevant like two months ago and I said "hey guys, I've got this fic that'll be finished by friday!" and now its july???? Im so sorry and tysm for the request aussie,,, I loved writing this sm!!!!!!

Summary: You get shot, but Leon is trained in first aid by Saint John's Ambulance (I will write a summary when I'm less tired <3)

warnings: descriptions of injury, blood, guns - nothing too bad, all just average RE stuff, mentions of alcohol

This was not the kind of Thursday you had expected. Pulling a bandage from your kit you tried to remember your first aid training, but cold seemed to make your mind sluggish. The snow fell heavier; the clouds overhead and fields blending into a grey-white mass.

This was supposed to be a simple mission; a quick in-and-out job. You and Leon had been sent to talk to some locals in a remote mountain town - just gather some information about the hiker disappearances. They had all been friendly and happy to share what they knew; it was odd talking to people who genuinely had no interest in hurting you, but you welcomed the surprise. Yet - as always seemed to be the way - not everyone was friendly. Especially not the man who shot you. Yeah, he wasn’t very nice at all actually.

Apply pressure

Yeah, alright. Apply pressure - okay.

Inhaling deeply, you surveyed the damage on your leg. Your black trousers were soaked in - what you could only imagine to be - blood and clung to your leg. From where you sat you could now see back the way you came. Your stomach dropped. A trail of blood - your blood - cut through pristine white snow. You glanced back down at your leg again; the fabric sticking to your skin. Shakily, you lifted your hands onto the wound. This was going to hurt.

You pressed down on the gaping wound in your leg. A hiss escaped your mouth, followed by a string of curses. Blinking quickly you tried to focus on breathing steadily as stars danced before your eyes.

Fucking hell, ouch. Fuck.

Leon, where are you?

Squeezing your eyes shut you remembered the young blonde-haired Leon's boyish grin. He used to be so naïeve and keen. The day he'd asked you out he had practically skipped away afterwards - turning back twice to smile at you and awkwardly offering a little wave before he finally turned the corner.

He had grown a lot since then; you both had. Even so, he never lost his playful nature - something you were glad for. It wasn’t quite the same - since as Leon grew more confident, he also realised how nervous he could make you - which meant that he now knew exactly how to tease you and make you blush. His newfound cockiness just attracted you to him all the more.

Flurries of snow had begun to settle in your hair. It was really cold. Your feet hurt from the cold; your face stung.

I need to get up.

I can't stay here.

With a surge or determination you hauled yourself up into a crouch - then a stand. Pain clawed up your thigh as your muscles cramped and sent you reeling into a nearby tree. Setting your jaw you huffed out a breath.

I'm not fucking dying here.

You took one step, pausing to let the agony rising in your chest settle again - still half-leaning on the tree. Setting off, you made it a few more steps before you faltered. Feeling a stab of pain through your leg, you sucked in the freezing air. As you tried to hobble onwards, one misstep became two and then became five, before you lost your balance entirely. Veering towards the ground, you shot out your hands. At the cost of grazing your hands across the jagged rocks, you were just able to catch yourself. Pausing for a moment, you let the shock of the impact with the hard surface pass, taking deep breaths.

The skin on your hands was raw. It stung in the frigid air. Despite the cold that seemed to overcome the rest of your body, your leg had this burning ache - as if someone was driving a hot poker straight into your bone.

Something about the eerie silence and monochrome surroundings seemed to undermine time. The signal on your radio had gone dead long ago - something strange about this remote mountain village frying the circuits. To your numb body, struggling through the pain of walking didn’t seem worthwhile. Instead you lay, curled up - as best you could with the state of your leg - in the snow.

I’m going to die, aren’t I?

I don’t want to die.

I’m so cold.

Then there came a far off sound. The crunching of footfall in the snow.

"Y/N?"

You froze.

"Y/N?" His voice came again, this time sharper; louder.

"Leon?" You said, your voice small and hoarse, you tried to push yourself up off the ground, which was not a good idea as it dragged your leg across the gravel. A string of curses leapt from your mouth.

“Woah, woah-” He knelt at your side, pulling you up into a sitting position with a hand under each of your arms. "Shit, what happened? You're freezing."

Leaning into his side, you struggled to form words - instead fisting your hands in his coat as you tried to think. The sudden brightness of the white snow made your head buzz, a dull ache running through it.

"I dunno." You grumbled. "Got shot, I guess."

"You guess?" Leon echoed. Although his tone was snarky, you knew he was just trying to keep you calm and focused. He fumbled with his radio in his free hand. "Hunnigan? We're going to need that helicopter after all."

The sharp pain now spanned the whole of your leg - as though it were resonating up and down the bone. In a single, swift motion, Leon reached over, pressing his palm down onto the wound. You gasped, unintentionally jerking your leg.

“Easy,” He spoke softly, as though to a small, frightened animal - which you supposed was appropriate. “Easy there, deep breaths,”

Remaining firm, he kept his hand in place; you couldn’t help but admire his unwavering confidence. Any kind of hesitation or mistake would have just caused you more pain,

You grit your teeth, inhaling as he said. Out of the corner of your eye you could see his grimace; the way his nose wrinkled up at the sight of your leg. You couldn’t blame him, the dried blood gave off a sickening metallic smell. You gagged.

“Hey, Y/N?” His tone was playful - maybe a little more upbeat than he intended - an overcompensation to hide the anxious undertone.

“Hm?” You replied - not necessarily disinterested, but more focused on breathing normally.

"Do you remember when we met?"

You furrowed your brow. Inhale, exhale. "What?"

"Don't you remember? That time at the party? I vomited in your car."

The memory flooded back.

The base was loud enough that you felt it buzzing in your feet more than you could hear it clearly. The twenty - maybe thirty? - people throughout the darkened apartment didn’t really seem to care. Or notice, for that matter.

Despite being a party consisting almost entirely of trainee officers - there was an awful lot of “drunk and disorderly” going on. Not to mention a fair amount of “Indecent exposure” and without a doubt “possession” of some substances. But, hey, you weren’t going to ruin their vibe.

This definitely wasn’t really your scene.

You hovered in beside the doorway to the kitchen - unsure of what to do with yourself. It felt wrong to leave so early, but your friends had long since abandoned you and it wasn’t as though they’d miss you anyway. A girl you knew stumbled past you - her blonde hair recognisable anywhere - and for a moment you thought about saying hi. Then you noticed the boy she had in tow, who seemed to be getting awfully handsy.

Yeah, I’ll just leave them to it.

Abandoning your cup of - let’s be real - who-knows-what, you awkwardly squeezed through the crowd towards the front door. A few boys whistled at you as you tried to slip past them and out into the bleakly lit hallway. Although it was slightly easier to ignore as they were all drunk out their minds - it still made you wrinkle up your nose in disgust.

The door clicked shut behind you, muffling the noise of the party. Letting out a sigh, you stared blankly down the corridor, allowing your eyes to adjust to the brightness.

“Those guys are dicks.”

You whipped your head around comically fast, confused as to who had spoken.

“Down here,” He added and you turned, seeing him sat neatly beside the door, just at your feet. He didn’t look at you, instead staring at the wall across from him. Even if you hadn’t been able to smell the beer, you could tell from the way he loosely gripped the bottle that he was smashed.

“Oh - uh, yeah.” you replied.

“I don’t even like parties.” He said, looking up at you. “I have no idea why I’m here.”

As you held his gaze, shrugging sympathetically - you suddenly were able to place his face. He sat next to you in one of your lectures - it must have been a dull one, because you also remembered (making your face heat up a little) that you had spent a considerable amount of time thinking how cute he was.

What was his name?

Somehow he looked completely different here - instead of being so tightly strung and nervous that he looked as though he might just collapse if anyone so much as looked at him, he seemed freer; calmer. His hair was messier too, you noticed, as he pushed it back out of his eyes - setting off butterflies in your stomach.

Leon. That was it.

“If it helps, it’s not really my scene either. I’m headed home,” you offered with a small smile.

"I don't know if you've noticed," He said, matter-of-factly. "But I'm quite drunk, actually."

You stifled a giggle - he was much more fun to talk to like this, rather than his up-tight one word responses. If you were honest, you stopped trying with him within the first few classes, as he never seemed that interested in what you had to say and the moment class ended he suddenly became some kind of record sprinter to leave the lecture theatre.

"I could tell,"

He raised his eyebrows, nodding seriously. "Smart girl,"

For a slightly too long moment he paused and you watched as he searched for his words. It was unbearably cute to see the blonde-haired boy furrowing his brow, clearly thinking as hard as his intoxicated mind would allow.

"I'd like to go home, but I can’t drive,” He said and then suddenly looked deeply dejected, as though the weight of his words just hit him. He let out a huff and ran his hand through his hair again. “I hate parties.”

On any other occasion, you would have left the strange drunk guy in the corridor, where he belonged - no matter how cute he was.

Yet here you were, at two am with a very smashed Leon Kennedy in the passenger seat. It was lucky that you hadn’t touched your cup of mysterious liquid at the party, because driving with a passenger who has just vomited into a plastic bag four (maybe five?) times was surprisingly difficult. He was weirdly apologetic about the whole thing, groaning and holding his head.

“I promise I’m not normally this bad.” He gagged again. “God, I’m sorry.”

You tried to sound reassuring as you spoke, but the vile smell was enough to make you gag as well. Although driving quickly would have gotten you out of the rancid car sooner, every time you turned a corner or hit a pothole - the poor boy beside you grew paler.

“It’s ok!” you said, perhaps sounding a little too reassuring, your voice rising several octaves. Although it was possible that he wasn’t used to drinking - you thought, glancing over at Leon, whose knuckles had gone white holding the plastic bag - this was more likely to be something worse. “Not much further now,”

It was lucky the road was empty - as it neared twelve fifty - because you braked much more suddenly than you meant to, lurching both of you forwards slightly. Leon swore and threw a hand over his mouth. You swallowed, trying your best to ignore the retching coming from the seat beside you.

“Wow,” Leon said, his voice raspy. “This is a great way to impress girls.”

That made you laugh. Though you felt a little mean thinking it, you really got the idea that this guy didn’t get around as much as you first thought. He was attractive, sure, in a sort of pretty way - but he gave this overwhelming feeling of lameness; he was constantly sheepish.

Exactly my type.

“Oh, yeah - I bet all the ladies love this.” you grinned. “Remind me to arrange our second date once I’ve gotten the smell of sick out of my car.”

He actually laughed, sounding considerably more sober than when he got in. Although you wouldn’t want to admit it, the sound made your heart skip a beat.

“Wait, so in this hypothetical scenario - I convinced you to come on a date with me?” he said. You could feel him looking at you. “Hypothetical me must be a real charmer.”

Okay, so he definitely was not as sober as you had thought. Heat rushed into your face as you desperately tried to remind yourself that he was drunk. He probably just flirts with everyone when he’s drunk.

He continued. "Y'know, when I see you in class, I'm normally too scared to even talk to you."

You risked a glance over at him, finding him now staring out of the window into the dark. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, you're like," He paused. "Way out of my league"

Leon was clearly not sober, but spoke with such openness that it was difficult to not take what he said seriously. You focused on the road ahead of you, stopping at a red light - even though the junction was empty. The quiet in the car was by no means uncomfortable, perhaps the knowledge that he wasn’t going to remember this took most of the pressure away. His presence was so unobtrusive - calming, even - that it felt as though you had been friends for years. Although he may not have noticed it, you felt a distinct shift in the air between you. He'd started something; laid the groundwork for something to be built between the two of you. He’d given you a glimpse of who the two of you could be. And once he was sober again, in your next 09.00 AM lecture - he would feel the shift too.

Within a few minutes you pulled up outside his flat - this time doing your best to roll to a stop gradually. He thanked you, a little awkwardly, and apologised for the vomit smell. You smiled and insisted it was no problem. And that was it; he waited outside the door, speaking into the intercom and then disappeared into the flat a moment later.

It was a strange memory. Somehow, with only a few words, he had caught your attention. The whole way home you had thought about him; waiting anxiously for your next lecture.

Leon adjusted his grip on your leg, which left you hissing in pain - grabbing onto his upper arm. Each breath of icy air stung at your lungs, leaving your head spinning even more violently.

“Yeah, I remember.” You said. “What about it?”

Leon tipped his head in place of a shrug - avoiding putting you in any more pain - and grinned. “I have absolutely no clue what happened that night.”

That was new. You felt sure you’d heard him talk about it before: to friends - or even family, occasionally - when they asked how you met. As you considered it, he did tend to stay quiet, letting you tell the story - only chipping in with the odd comment. After all, he was practically off his head that night.

Letting out a breathy laugh, you half-grinned; half-grimaced. “I never knew that.” You tilted your head to look up at him, continuing with eager curiosity. “So - wait - did you just think that I just randomly started to talk to you, after like a year of us mutually sitting in silence?”

He laughed. “Something like that.”

Mildly bemused, you snorted. “Oh my God, Leon - if you told me that back then I would have just about died.”

It was true. Even though, as you got older, your self confidence seemed to grow - back then you were no more than a gangly twenty year-old, who would have crumpled at the first sign of rejection. Embarrassed may as well have been your middle name, since you spent so much time convinced that everyone else thought you were an idiot.

“Hey, I wasn’t complaining,” He said. “When the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen starts chatting to you like you’ve been friends forever - you don’t question it!”

Even after nearly a decade - he still made you blush.

“Prettiest?”

“Mhm.”

As you struggled to find an answer that wouldn’t make you sound like either a disgustingly soppy romantic or socially inept teenage girl, your attention came back to your surroundings. With Leon there and the shock subsiding, you felt substantially warmer; your pulse was no longer thundering in your ears and while the pain was still by no means bearable, Leon had successfully kept your mind off of it.

“D’you know how long until someone will get here?” You asked after a moment.

“Not long now, " he said, glancing off into the sky, perhaps waiting to hear the hum of a helicopter in the thick cloud. “It’ll be fine, Y/N.”

And after another seven minutes, you would see that he was right; it would be fine. You’d be operated on by one of the best doctors that the government could muster up and - without too much more hassle, you lived to see another day.

AN: how do you finish fics?????? I just run out of plot and end it like a terrible sitcom?????

#leon kennedy #leon kennedy re4 #leon kenney re2 #leon re #leon re4 #re #leon resident evil #leon kennedy resident evil #resident evil 4 #resident evil x reader #re4 #re4 x reader #re4 remake #re leon x reader #leon x reader #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you

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crazyunsexycool · 2 years

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can you do stucky x reader where peggy time travels to the future and shows up and the boys kind of give her attention and leave the reader out so she gets really insecure and like even reckless/suicidal and it’s really angsty but happy ending?? love your writing sm by the way, your the best!🥰

Hi Darling,

Thank you for reading it means so much to me. I need you to get out of my brain though because I had been trying to come up with a situation where Peggy(🤮) showed up to the future mostly with Steve though. You have inspired me so I hope you like it!!!

A/N:Peggy is a major bitch so if you like her don’t read maybe. Also throw Stucky into any situation and I’ll probably write about it!😉

Word Count: 5.1k oops

Warnings: some injuries nothing described, Sharon (she’s a warning in the good way), ANGST!!!!!! Fluffy ending (I hope you like it) Peggy

Bucky had been running on nightmares and lack of sleep which meant he was grumpier than usual. With Steve out on a mission it was up to you to look after him. He was sitting in the kitchen with a cup of coffee in front of him. You know he has to be exhausted since he usually doesn’t drink coffee, with his high metabolism the caffeine barely has an effect on him.

“Hi my love,” you say as you walk up behind him and wrap your arms around his shoulders.

“Hi bunny.” He replies as he places one hand over yours.

“Have you gotten any sleep at all? You were gone before I woke up?”

“Not really,” he yawns.

“Why don’t we go to our room and I can run a bath for us. That usually helps you relax, what do you say?”

He looks up at you with tired eyes and nods. You move from behind him grabbing and pulling at his hand so that he'll follow. You loved taking care of them, you even spent hours trying to perfect recipes they would mention to try and give them some comfort from when they were younger or going out finding items they used before.

As you move through the halls of the compound you hear a few voices but most importantly you hear the voice of your other super soldier. You feel giddy as you hear him get closer because you’ve missed him and so has Bucky after he was out on a mission for longer than anticipated.

As you round the corner you see Steve, still in his uniform and as handsome as ever. What catches you off guard is the brunette by his side standing a little too close for your comfort. Taking in her appearance you notice the hair and clothing are straight out of the 40s, as you look at Steve you see he’s beaming as he talks to her and it hits you like a ton of bricks.

Peggy Carter.

Bucky confirms it a few seconds later.

“Peggy?”

“Hi Bucky.” She smiles brightly as she comes closer and hugs him.

“What are you doing here?”

“Well you see I was on a mission in my time and,” she turns back to Steve. “What did you say it was?”

“A portal.”

“Yes, well a portal opened and here I am. I must say it was rather confusing but fortunately Steve was at the same facility.”

“Wow, how crazy is this?”

Sam who had come in behind Steve and Peggy sees everything going on as you stand to the side completely stunned.

“Hey Y/N.”

“Oh, hi Sam I’m glad you’re back safe.” You manage to get out.

“Who is this?” Peggy asks almost too sweetly.

You and Sam began to speak but Steve beat you to it.

“This is Y/N, Bucky’s girlfriend.” He introduces you.

“Y/N this is Peggy.” He looks at you but your expression lets him know he fucked up. While yes it’s true you were Bucky’s girlfriend you were also his. So it confused you that he wouldn’t say so. It was a discussion you three had many times before and it always ended the same, they didn’t care if people knew they were in a polyamorous relationship it was nobodies business but yours. It seems like it was different for Peggy.

“Hi.”

“Hello.” Was all that was said before an awkward silence fell among the five of you.

“Ok. So I’m going to change out of this and I’ll meet you for the debriefing.” Sam said as he moved as quickly as possible.

“If you’ll excuse us, Bucky and I were on our way to do something.”

“Bun how about a rain check? I’d like to catch up with Peggy.” He looks so happy you can’t say no.

“Of course love. I’ll see you later.” You kiss his cheek.

Bucky turns to Peggy and offers her his arm which she quickly takes, leaving you and Steve alone.

“Bugs, I’m sorry.”

“What happened to ‘l have nothing to be ashamed of’”? You cross your arms

“Does she even know about you and Bucky?”

His face gets red as he scratches the back of his neck, it’s his tell when he’s nervous.

“Kind of, I told her about Bucky and I. Maybe I made it seem like we weren’t together anymore.”

You just stare up at him. Taken aback by his admission, was he just ashamed of you?

“Please, don’t take it the wrong way.”

“How am I supposed to take it?” You narrow your eyes at him.

“Captain Rogers, Sergeant Barnes is requesting your presence in the living room.” Jarvis says.

You turn to leave but Steve wraps his arms around your waist before turning you to face him. He dips his head to capture your lips in a kiss but you pull back.

“Why are you trying to kiss your best friend’s girl Cap?”

“Come on bugs, I’m sorry.”

“If you're truly sorry you’ll tell her about me and our relationship, until then I’m only Bucky’s girlfriend and I’m not a cheater so hands off.”

Reluctantly he lets you go and you disappear down the hall until you get to your shared apartment in the compound. You want to give him the benefit of the doubt but in the back of your mind you knew he should have introduced you as his girlfriend. If Steve didn't, maybe Bucky should have said something instead. The afternoon went by quickly and you mostly spent it in your head questioning your relationship with them. Maybe you were getting ahead of yourself, the 40s were a different time and maybe Peggy wouldn’t understand.

***********

You woke up the next morning to an empty bed, it wasn’t unusual sometimes they woke up earlier than you. But you had a bad feeling as you went to the bathroom and found that they haven’t used it recently.

After getting ready for the day and leaving your bedroom you find Steve and Bucky in the kitchen. They were in sweats which was unusual since they normally were coming back from their morning run.

“Good morning bunny.” Bucky is the first to greet you, giving you a quick kiss.

“Morning love.”

“Morning bugs .” Steve says as he gets closer to you.

“Morning Steven.” You say as you skirt around him to get to the coffee pot.

Bucky looks at Steve confused, you only use their names if you have to or if you’re mad.

“So what happened last night you didn’t come to bed?”

“It was late, we didn't want to wake you bunny.”

“It’s never stopped you before. We’ve all come home in the middle of the night and went to sleep in our shared bed.” You frown not really understanding why it would be a problem now.

“We’re sorry. It really was late and you look so peaceful sleeping.” Bucky comes over to you resting his chin on your shoulder as he wraps his arms around you. He starts placing kisses on your neck.

“Fine, I forgive you.” You laugh as he picks you up and turns so that you are face to face with Steve.

“Can I have my kiss?” He pouts and you give in. Giving him a quick kiss as they cage you in between them.

“What are your plans for today?” Steve asks as he bumps his nose with yours.

“I have a briefing for that mission tomorrow and then training with Nat and Clint. Are we still on for our pre mission movie night?”

“Absolutely bunny. We wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Good, now please let me go or I’ll be late.”

“One more kiss. One for each of us though.” You give them each another kiss and pull away before things start to get hot and heavy between the three of you.

“See you tonight.” You say as you head out the door.

************

It was around 7:00 pm when you finally got back. Without being able to see your boys the rest of the day you were anxious to get the alone time with them before your mission. You take a quick shower and put on cute pajamas like you normally do for these nights. You hear the tv in the living room is on so you hurry out to get settled for the movie and there they are Steve and Bucky in their regular seats, but that’s not what gets your attention. It’s the occupant of your seat right between them, Peggy. In an instant your mood has changed now you’re pissed that you’ll have to spend the night with her and you aren’t even dressed. It was supposed to be a night just the three of you.

You turn to at least change into some jeans but Bucky heard you and called out so you turn back and head towards the living room.

“Hello, Y/N it’s nice to see you again.” Peggy says as she looks you up and down and she scrunches her face almost in disapproval of your outfit and you try to not roll your eyes at her. Now that she’s here you don’t understand what the big deal is. You’ve always heard about how incredible, kind, smart and beautiful she was.

“Peggy.” You look at Bucky and Steve waiting for them to do something but they’re busy selecting the movie you’ll be watching. With the couch being completely occupied you sit alone in an armchair with your legs tucked in under you, if at least Bucky would have sat with you it would be ok but you feel like the one intruding on their night with Peggy and not the other way around.

After they picked a movie you had to sit there watching out of the corner of your eye as Peggy flirted with both of them and they allowed it. She leaned into Steve or grabbed Bucky’s arm and in that moment you felt disrespected. You wanted to say something but if they weren’t stopping it and giving you your place why should you cause a scene? You excuse yourself and head to bed and just like the day previous night neither of them share your bed.

***************

You had another tradition amongst yourself and that was that on mission day whoever was there would go with you to the jet to send you off. Except neither Steve or Bucky seemed to be available. They weren’t even in the apartment. So you got ready for your mission and headed toward the jet. The one person you didn’t want to see was there though talking to Nat. You make your way over and Nat grabs your things and heads into the jet.

“You’re going on this mission too, isn’t it dangerous?” Peggy asks, surprised to see you in a black suit, one similar to Nat’s.

“Well I’m an agent so I’m trained for it. Don’t worry your pretty little head, I'll be fine.”

“Well with two skilled agents such as Romanoff and Barton I don’t doubt it.”

“Y/N just as skilled as us.” You turn to see Sharon coming towards you. Smiling brightly at you and you remembered that they’re related.

“And who might you be?” Clearly annoyed that someone was defending you.

“Sharon Carter, your niece.” She says smirk on her lips. Behind her you see Steve and Bucky coming up towards the jet and relief washes over you.

“My niece, working for Shield? That’s wonderful carrying on the Carter legacy.”

“Sure because that’s what’s important.”

“What are you doing here Sharon?” Steve asks.

“Fury asked me to head out with these guys.” She says as she walks past you and heads towards the jet but stops before getting on to talk with Clint.

Bucky quickly makes his way to you. Giving you a hug and whispering in your ear to be careful before giving you a breath stealing kiss. Steve on the other hand just waves at you and your heart drops. You realized he never told you if he told Peggy the truth of your relationship and seeing the way he was acting you knew he hadn’t and it broke your heart.

“What the hell was that about, did you and Rogers have a fight?” Sharon asks.

“No, he introduced me only as Bucky’s girlfriend.” You shrug.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not now I’d rather focus on the mission.” You say as you take a seat with Sharon beside you.

She had become a close friend through your time working for Shield and she was the first one you told about your relationship with both super soldiers and she was extremely supportive. It was easy to compare her to her aunt and the choice was clear as to which Carter was your favorite.

******

The mission has been a success but you were hurt. Some bruised ribs, a busted lip and a concussion. You just wanted to get home and lay down, maybe get some cuddles in with Steve and Bucky, you couldn’t care less how the last couple of days with them had been. This could easily have been your last mission and you would have been upset at them.

But once again they disappointed you. Clint had assured you he called ahead to let them know you had been injured but when the jet landed they weren’t there. You got patched up on the medical floor and Sharon took you up to your apartment and it was too quiet. Not sure if it was how tired you were or the fact that once again you had been pushed to the side in favor of Peggy but it was enough to send you over the edge and the tears started to fall freely as Sharon held you. Trying to soothe your breaking heart, it was always like this you were always second choice to everything. With your parents it was always your siblings over you, your teachers chose your classmates over you, your siblings chose each other over you.

It was always like that except for two things in your life, your job and your relationship or so you thought. You excelled in training and were top of your class, that’s how you were selected to be part of the Avengers and up to that moment Steve and Bucky had always made you feel like the most important person in their lives. Yet you were sitting in the living room being comforted by your friend instead of them.

After a while you finally stopped crying, slowly getting up with Sharon’s help. She suggested staying with her for a couple of days to help you clear your mind away from the compound. Going into the bedroom and getting a travel bag from the walk in closet you gather some of your things. As you walk down the hallway you hear yelling, specifically it’s Sharon yelling at someone. Leaning against the wall hidden from everyone you see Sharon in Bucky and Steve’s faces demanding an explanation as to why they weren’t at the compound knowing you would be back from the mission. After Clint called ahead to let them know you had been injured. Their only excuse was that they had gone out to the city with Peggy.

You put your hand over your mouth to stop the sob that threatened to escape, taking a deep breath you straighten your posture as much as possible and walk out.

“I’m ready Sharon.”

She hurried to your side and grabbed your bag, staying between you and the super soldiers.

“Where are you going bunny?” Bucky takes a step towards you but one look from Sharon stops him in his tracks.

“I'm going with Sharon. She offered to let me stay with her while I heal.”

“But we’re here now, we’ll take care of you.”

“No that’s ok, I’d rather know that the person taking care of me will be there in the morning and not spending time with someone else.” You snap and head towards the door. With Sharon right behind you and then she turns to them.

“Now that she wants space you won’t give it to her? I will shoot both of you in the kneecaps if you don’t back off.”

“But we just want to talk to her.”

“She is injured, she has a concussion and she was given medication. She isn’t in a good place to talk.”

***********

You wish it had gotten better from there but only one thing changed and that is how reckless you were getting out in the field. You came back injured every single time and each of those injuries could have been avoided. It got bad enough to the point that you were one more screw up away from being taken off the rotation indefinitely. It seemed like everyone but them had noticed your change the way you were completing missions, from calculated and precise to going in guns blazing consequences be damned. Steve and Bucky rarely check up on you, if they weren’t on a mission they were with Peggy. She had invaded your life for about a month and you didn’t know how to get rid of her. Stark, Strange and Banner were taking their sweet time coming up with a solution on how to get her back to her original time but that didn’t really go over too well with her. You had all been in the living room on the rare night that no one was out on a mission when she said as much.

“I’ve been thinking that I’d like to stay.” She said, excited at the possibility. Everyone looked at her expressions ranging from happy to angry and everything in between. But you didn’t look at her, you looked at them, trying to see how they would react to the news. Bucky seemed annoyed and Steve was confused.

“Why?” Nat asked, as always she was unreadable but you had talked to her about the situation and she confessed she didn’t care much for Peggy either. You were relieved to hear that because you don’t know what you would do without her.

“Well, I do like it so much more here. And well Steve is here,” she pauses and takes Steve’s hand. “I would like us to have the relationship we didn’t get to have in the 40s.”

The room was quiet and she squirmed at the lack of reaction. For you however it would have been easier if she held you down and Steve ripped out your heart. Without waiting for anyone to say anything you got up and Steve followed, you didn’t stop until you got to your apartment.

“It’s not what you think, bugs swear.”

“It’s never what I think is it. That’s what you always say. Then what is it? Please explain to me what makes her think that you are willing to have a relationship with her? Oh wait, is it the fact that she thinks you’re single because you haven’t told us about us?”

“I’m sorry, I fucked up I know I did but I’m sorry.”

“That doesn’t mean much to me right now. You and Bucky have both pushed me to the side since she got here. Am I not enough for you?”

“Baby don’t say that of course you are.” He grabs your hands and gives them each a kiss before looking at you.

“I don’t know, it was nice to have someone else that knew me before the serum and the shield. When it was just the skinny kid from Brooklyn I guess I got carried away in the familiarity of being around Bucky and Peggy.” He says sincerely. He looks at you with sad eyes.

“I’m sorry Steve.” You shake your head. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t born in the 1910s so that I could meet skinny you and tell you what an amazing man you are without the shield and without the suit or the glory of being Captain America.” You snarl, ripping your hands from his grip.

“I’m sorry that I’m not good enough at showing you how much I love you even if you weren’t Captain America. Maybe my actions weren’t enough to show that I fell in love with the artist that hides behind the shield. The man that puts everyone else before himself. The Steve that doesn’t take himself too seriously and lets his friends make fun of the fact that he said language once. You’ll have to forgive me for wanting your happiness above anything else, so if you want to be with her that’s fine go live your life with her.”

By the time you were done talking you were both in tears. You crash into his chest and wrap your arms around his waist as he wraps his arms around you. He kisses the top of your head.

“Please I don’t want to lose you bubs. I need you so much.” You whisper into his chest.

“You won’t lose me. I did tell her, about us she knew when she said what she did back there.”

“Captain Rogers, Agent Y/L/N you are needed in the jet immediately. It is a matter of national security.” Jarvis interrupts.

You reluctantly separate from him but don’t dare to look him in the eye, quickly going to change and head directly into the jet; the end of your love life could wait a few more hours.

Once on the you both got to the jet quickly and quietly you looked around finding a seat next to Bucky. You rest your head on his shoulder, a move that surprises him since you hadn’t been talking to him either.

“I’m sorry I let you down bunny.” He whispers before placing a kiss on your hairline. When you look up you see her sitting across from you with a small smirk on her lips. Perhaps she knew she won and that she took them from you.

********************

The mission had gone horribly wrong, somehow in the middle of the attack you ended up having to work with Peggy and you to be completely honest you would rather work with the bad guys than her. In a fight that she had led you to you had lost your comms so you were disconnected from the rest of the team. The only thing you could do was keep pushing forward toward your objective. What you didn’t know was that Peggy still had her comms and she had been instructed to fall back. That it was too dangerous and that they had found another way to stop the attack.

By the time you realized what was happening it was too late. You had stepped on trigger that would detonate some type of bomb if you moved.

“Peggy, please go get Steve and Bucky.” You said looking up at the brunette that stood in the doorframe.

“I don’t think I will. See I still can’t understand what is going on between you and Steve. Especially if you are Bucky’s girlfriend. So I think this would work out for the best, don't you think? I could just say you were being reckless after all you have been doing just that for the last month.” She smiles at you.

“Too bad you won’t get a chance to hurt her anymore.”

A sigh of relief escapes your lips as you hear Sharon’s voice.

“Y/N are you ok?”

“No, I am stepping on some kind of land mine or something. I can’t move or this whole place will explode.”

You hear Sharon on comms talking to the rest of the team. She had her back turned so she didn’t see the man that came up behind Peggy and put a gun up to her temple and ushered her toward the center of the room you were in.

Bucky and Steve show up through one door along with Clint while the other door allows Nat, Tony and Sharon a view into the room.

“What do we have here?” He says into Peggy’s neck and she tries to move away from him.

“I read somewhere that this one right here is the great love of your life, Captain. So let’s make this fun. Either save the love of your life.” He says as he places Peggy on top of another pressure plate. “Or save the agent over there.” He motions to you with his gun.

As he finishes his sentence he drops dead a clean shot from Nat. A countdown on one of the screens of the makeshift command center you were standing in starts. The countdown is going faster than you would like and you dare look up at everyone at the door. They are making a plan and as the countdown gets to five seconds your world slows down. Steve and Bucky both run towards you, Bucky grabs you by your waist and you fall to the ground with Bucky on top of you to cover you from the impending explosion as Steve covers the pressure plate with his shield taking most of the hit. Between Tony, Sharon and Nat they manage to get Peggy off the plate but the countdown hits zero and a portal opens against the wall. Bucky and Steve move to get you into the hallway but the portal pulls them in, and with Peggy being close to it she is pulled in as well before the portal closes.

************

They were gone. It had been a month and they were gone. Tony and Bruce worked around the clock to try and find them but it was no use.

The guilt you felt had no end. It was your fault for being careless that you had lost them. They were it for you and they were gone. You could barely sleep as you replayed the last moments over and over in your mind. They managed to push you away from the portal. It was pulling you in and they managed to save you from whatever hell they could all into. So the last conversation you had with Steve wouldn’t leave your memory no matter how much you tried and the words Bucky told you on the jet haunted your dreams.

For the sake of the team you tried to at least do paperwork, you had promised yourself to never go out on a mission again. You wouldn’t put your life on the line anymore because if you were gone then so were they for good. No one but you were gifted with seeing the two loves of your life how they truly were in the privacy of your home. You would be thankful for that for the rest of your life.

“Ms. Y/L/N, your presence is being requested in the common area.” Jarvis announced.

Without thinking about what is going on you leave your apartment and head towards the living room you all shared. You freeze as you take in the scene. Standing in the middle of the living room were Steve and Bucky, dressed in the 30s maybe 40’s style and you were in shock. They looked at you and smiled before coming closer.

“Am I dreaming?” You whisper. “I must be dreaming because I remember losing you.”

“You aren’t dreaming bugs, we’re really here.” Steve says as he stands before you. Cupping your face in his hands he tilts it back so that he can look into your eyes. You bring your hand to cover his and move it up his arm and under until it’s resting on his chest. Tears threaten to spill as you look at him and you can’t help it so you fist his shirt and pull him in. Capturing his lips in a desperate kiss letting you both know that this is really happening. A pair of hands find their way onto your hips and before you know it you are being turned around and you meet the pair of steel blue eyes you’ve missed so much.

“Hi bunny.” Is all Bucky says before he dips his head for a kiss of his own and you respond quickly not wanting to miss the chance to feel his lips again.

“We’ve missed you so much. We’re sorry it took us so long to get back to you but there was something we had to do back in our time.” He tells you. But you’re so happy that they’re here that you don’t care if they had to go to the beginning of time if that meant they would make it back to you.

“What did you have to do?” You ask.

“Oh we had to get this.” Bucky turns you back around and you look at Steve who is now on one knee holding a small box in his hand. Your eyes begin to water and you look back at Bucky to find him on his knees as well with a box of his own.

Steve is the first to speak.

“Bugs, we are so sorry for what we put you through for the last two and a half months. It was never our intention to hurt you. The last argument we had kept playing in my head while we were away and it made me realize that you have given me so much and I didn’t appreciate it, I didn’t appreciate you the way I should have.”

“We got so lost in this little piece of the past that we got when Peggy was here that we didn’t even consider the whole future we had with you. I meant what I said on the jet that day. I’m sorry, we both are so sorry that we let you down. This month away from you has been pure hell for us and we never have to go through that again.” Bucky adds.

“So Bugs, if you'll forgive us for being complete idiots and give us a chance, we want to spend the rest of our lives with you. Will you marry us?” Steve finishes and they both open their boxes at the same time. Steve’s holding a simple gold band while Bucky is holding a gold band with a single diamond.

You stare at them, the fear of rejection in their eyes but there is also hope. Your broken heart is finally starting to put itself back together by having the loves of your life with you again.

“Yes, I will. I’ll marry both of you.” You barely get to finish your sentence before they’re on you hugging and kissing both you and each other. When they finally separate they pull you to the couch to cuddle and you admire the rings.

“We know they’re simple and we can change them if you want.” Steve says Sheepishly.

“I love them.” You assure them both.

Bucky grabs your left hand in his to get a better look.

“They belonged to our mom’s.” He adds.

“Then I’ll guard them with my life.”

“I love you both so much.”

“We love you too.” They say in unison.

#stucky x you #steve rogers #bucky x reader #captain america #bucky barnes #stucky x reader #steve x bucky #steve x reader #angst #angst with a happy ending #stucky

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